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polyklok · 1 year

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B, D, F, I, J, K, P, U, X, Y smut for toki please i hope this isn’t too many i have an unhealthy obsession with toki i wish he was real😭😭😭💔

BITCH ME TOO

It’s so hard to be a groupie when the band isn’t even real 😔 lol

Anywho-

B- Body Part

He could write a thesis on all the parts of your body and why he loves each one, but his favorite is your tummy! He loves how soft it is, he loves the way it folds and twists when you move, and he probably has a breeding kink so-

If you’re chubbier, he likes to playfully poke at it and squeeze your waist as he’s kissing you. If you’re skinnier, he finds the image of the bulge of his cock moving in your ‘stomach’ really hot.

As for on him? He’s hasn’t thought about it before but Toki would say his arms. He’s obviously ripped and he likes that he can pick you up and manhandle you around if need be.

D- Dirty Secret

Toki is very open with you so he doesn’t have many secrets. That being said, he is a little, erm, fucked up in the head so I think a small part of him craves to watch you get dicked down by Skwisgaar and even join in on the action.

The guitarists have a complicated relationship, ok?

F- Favorite Position

This is me realizing now that I know like…three named positions at most

Ok, after some research, I’ve decided that Toki would be a big fan of Rocking Horse. He likes the closeness, leaning into you, seeing your face and being able to grab at your hips and control how you move on him. Though, he usually resorts to classic missionary.

I- Intimacy

It’s a bit of a mixed bag. Usually, Toki will start off very sweet and giving to you but that quickly melts away when his head starts getting clouded with pleasure.

His foreplay is extremely passionate, he’s completely focused on your pleasure, usually getting you to an orgasm before he even takes his pants off.

But he has a tendency to get quite rough, even if he tries to hold himself back. His thrusts get hard and sloppy, he grips onto you until you start bruising, his little whimpers turn into grunts. He might even accidentally hurt you- if something crosses the line, you’re gonna have to be very vocal in order to get him to snap out of it, and he’ll apologize immensely! It’s gonna take some patience to find what you both can gain pleasure from at the same time.

His aftercare is top notch too, very intimate.

J- Jack Off

Poor boy didn’t even start until his early twenties, his religious environment made him terrified of the act when he was young.

Once he was in Dethklok, he finally stopped fearing God and decide to take a whack at whackin’ it. I’m so sorry And-woof!-he found himself a new favorite pastime.

Ok, honestly, Toki doesn’t masturbate as much as some people do, but at least a couple times a week. And it’s very intense. He has to bite his lip, or sometimes his shirt, to suppress his moans as he thrusts up into his own hand. He uses his own imagination rather than porn, maybe he’s thinking of you. He usually finishes on himself rather than on the bed or something (see headcanon X).

If you two are in a relationship and are suddenly apart from each other, likely because he’s on tour, he’s gonna be masturbating a lot more and he’s always gonna FaceTime you to join him. Please, please join him, he feels so much better if he’s coming with you.

K- Kink

Hair pulling, temperature stimulation (like using ice or hot wax), blind folding, overstimulation, breeding, cockwarming, praise and a little bit of degradation.

He’s also usually the one in control of these situations. He doesn’t like being a sub all that much.

P- Pace

Like I said, he can start slow but he gets rough very quickly. While he doesn’t “Jackhammer” (I hate that word) he does keep a generally fast pace. If you put music on in the background, he gonna naturally keep pace with it.

U- Unfair

He teases you all the time, even to a point where you can’t tell if it’s accidental or not! He’ll grope and grab all your sensitive parts and then ask what you want for dinner. His lips will graze over your neck before he gets caught up in an interesting part in a movie!

Once you’re in the bedroom, he really doesn’t have the patience for teasing. He might taunt you a little bit, but he’s not going to withhold pleasure. If anything, he’s gonna keep making you cum for him until you can’t properly use words.

If you try to tease him in anyway…oh boy. In public, he’s pulling you away immediately and take you in whatever semi-private spot he can find. In the bedroom, he’s gonna whine and complain and might legitimately get upset if you don’t give up the act. He doesn’t like being teased.

X- X-Ray

It’s six inches fully erect, circumcised, slightly higher than average in girth, although the base is larger than the head, and it aims upwards against his stomach, not very veiny.

Not much else to say here. It’s a pretty nice dick.

Y- Yearning

Toki waxes and wanes. Sometimes he’ll go at it multiple times a day, multiple days in a row, and other times he could go a good month without even thinking about it. Although if you ask, he’s pretty much always down.

If he’s really desperate, he will literally get on his hands and knees and beg you for some relief. He can only jack off so many times before he craves your touch again.

If anyone else wants to make a request, refer back to here!

#dethklok #metalocalypse #polyklok is real #toki wartooth #dethklok headcanon #metalocaypse headcanon #request filled #metalocalypse x reader #metalocalypse toki

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lilscottishlesbian · 5 months

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Am I beautiful?|| Lillian Ezra

This is pre Sakamakis and way before her mother was murdered therefore her name is “Lillian Ezra” for now. She only changes her name to Alexander once she moves in with the Sakamakis.

An insight on her backstory and Lillian as a character as she’s more than just a cannibal.

TW: body shaming, body dysmorphia, parental issues , physical abuse, being sexualised

If I was human then this corset would have shatter my ribs or I would’ve suffocated to death. The dress is beautiful but not on me , purple is far from my colour. It would be nice if there was more coverage over my chest , I’m not flat chested which makes the dress more uncomfortable. The tightness of the corset causes my chest to press up excreting my cleavage as much as possible. I hate it , the whole sexy vampire look isn’t for me.

“Straighten her hair please, it’ll make her face look slimmer” Silas chimmed in before leaving again, anything to make me skinnier makes him pleased , makes him able to look at me. The stylists brushed my hair , which makes me question their talent because you never brush out curly hair but then they began straighten it. It makes me sad seeing my curls go away , it was the only thing I liked about myself. It was the one thing he actually complimented about me when I was younger but now that I’m older , Silas wants it straighten. If it was human hair it would be damaged by now , possibly burning off.

The only thing I like about my outfit are the gloves. They were black and lacy but the lace formed multiple spiderwebs. No matter how much Silas wanted to drown out as much as me as he possibly could , there’s also something there to show my personality. Ince they were done I made an effort to walk over to my mirror in these god awful heals. I looked at myself in the mirror and I don’t recognise her. Who I saw was someone in heels that made her look too tall, a woman in a dress that made her look too busty for her already lanky body which was now being suffocated under a tight corset. The dress was beautiful but the colour didn’t match her , she looked like a ghost. She looks sick. She looks fucking hideous I want to puke. She looks like a skeleton almost crying like a baby because she fucking hates herself.

I couldn’t stand the look of her , I hate her , I hate that I am her. But behind me in the mirror was a woman who looked like an older version of me if I was actually beautiful. I got her curls and her big brown eyes , I didn’t get the rosey cheeks or the lively look. I look sick like I’m dying , my eye bags are horrible. The older woman was my mother , she looked at me with a sorry look. She puts her soft warm hand on my shoulder and comfort instantly washes over me. Another thing I gained from my mother was the body heat that werewolves have which is warmer than humans and way warmer than those filthy blood suckers. If I can make one wish , I would be a full werewolf, the blood sucker side would be gone.

“Remember to smile my little spider” she says softly putting on a smile before walking away. Her smile touched her eyes but the eyes weren’t happy , like me she was fighting back tears. Once she left , Silas walked in making my stomach instantly turn. “Now you look like you’re ready for a ball” He sounded cheerful , clapping his hands together with that usual smirk on his face , like he’s proud of himself. Whats he got to be proud of? “I don’t feel…comfortable” I muttered my annoyance showing while I uncomfortable shifted around trying to find some comfort in this fucking trap of a corset. “Oh don’t be a baby Lilli , you’re fine” He scoffed , brushing off his own daughters discomfort, no surprise there. “Please father I’m-“

*Slap*

“You need to drop this bratty attitude Lillian! You’re a grown woman now. Act like it” I pressed my gloved against my burning cheek, tears are forming in my eyes now. “For once you actually look beautiful, don’t spoil it with those pathetic tears” For once? I only look beautiful when I’m in pain? When I’m..sexualised? Am I actually beautiful?

“The carriage is outside , now hurry up we wouldn’t want to be late” His mood instantly goes back to being cheerful , acting like nothing happened. Silas walked out expecting me to follow. Time for another Galla held by the king Karlheinz. His sons are meant to be there which is why Silas forced me to dress up.

#Spotify #diabolik lovers #haunted dark bridal #laito sakamaki #ayato sakamaki #kanato sakamaki #yui komori #shu sakamaki #subaru sakamaki #reiji sakamaki #lillian ezra dl oc #lillian alexander #dialovers oc #diabolik lovers oc

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igotanidea · 2 years

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The Raven's daughter: Morpheus x Matthew's daughter part 7

previously: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6 (catching up is highly recommended)

Part 7

A kickass party

-Well, sure as hell it took you long enough- Kat greeted her friends, fairly annoyed – do you wish to tell me what kept you.

- Not really, but you’re not gonna let me of lightly, are you.

- Not a chance.

- Great. Because that’s exactly what I need – relieving the most terrible day of my life – y/n entered the cafeteria and started to study the menu for the day. Nothing particularly interesting and she was wondering if maybe she should skip the meal, but the rumbling in her belly had different plans.

- Oh come, on, y/n. Spill the bean – Kat had already made an order and now was dragging her friend towards one of the tables.

- I got suspended.

- what? – Kat snarked – the golden child got punished? Oh God! What did you do you rebel?

- I called the classes off. Nearly anyone showed up so there was no point in conducting it. Or at least it seemed like that at the point. Clearly a mistake from my part – y/n sighed

- How long?

- Three days. Gadling will be assigned to my students until next week, can you imagine that?

- Well, he is hot, so maybe you could use that as an excuse to ….

- Kat!

- What? You can’t stay single forever, you know. You are not getting younger and skinnier, girl. And speaking of boys, I’m actually pretty glad you got so much time on your hands now.

- Yeah, thanks for lifting my spirits, my friend. What’s your idea than?

- A party!

- A party? – y/n looked at her confused – are you serious.

- No. I’m not. You are making up for both of us. Thus, you have to let go of all the tension, so … party. And before you say no….

-Im down for it.

- …. Let me tell you why…... Wait? You’re actually saying yes? Who are you and what did you do to my friend?

- It’s like in this Avril song, you know all my life I’ve been good but now….

- That’s what I’m talking about! – Kat threw a fist in the air – my girl! So, the plan…

- You’ve already made a plan?

- Obviously. I know damn well that only facts speak to you, so I just in case I prepared my case for presentation.

- Not only facts.

- Of course not – Kat nodded in agreement – you are miss imagination after all. So imagine how much fun we are going to have. Oh, and we have a third musketeer coming. – she waved a hand towards another women who was just entering the cafeteria. – Sarah!

- Morning ladies, how’s your day so far? – the elegant redhead approached them and put her designer bag on the chair.

y/n rolled her eyes. She definitely wasn’t going to repeat the story.

-Someone’s in the mood – Sarah stated

- Don’t mind her. y/n had quite an eventful forenoon. However, I did my magic to convince her to participate in our ladies’ night.

- Magic, indeed, than. – Sarah smiled.

-Oh, come on, I’m not a bore – y/n exclaimed – just …. mature. And I can’t believe you were involved in this shenanigans, Sarah.

-To be honest, I was plan B. Kat was going to win you with arguments, and I planned on attacking with threats.

-I’m glad it didn’t come to that

- So do I. Anyhow, since I’m the only one with the car, I’m going to pick you both up at 8 sharp. Be ready.

***

Growing up, y/n was never a party animal. Well, even as a grown-up woman she never aspired for that. On one hand she watched a lot of girls who felt at a club like at home, with their fancy dresses, looking hot and feminine and wondered if she could ever be like that, on the other always believed herself to not be good enough. Being self-conscious with her body and general outlook dolling up was always out of her reach. Supposedly she was afraid to make a fool out of herself. No one really noticed that though, because if anything she knew perfectly how to cover up. And what’s more, y/n was never jealous. It was more like a guilt inside her that she is not a picture of a perfect women, whatever that may mean. And that was also the reason why she struggled with relationships as her friend nicely mentioned.

However, making a promise to Kat and Sarah she made effort to get ready. Trying to balance her own comfort and the specifics of a club she picked up a blue sleeveless trouser suit. Nothing to extravagant or defiant yet still party-like. Hair down, luckily it was best to just leave them natural. Just a quick glance in the mirror just to avoid any second thoughts and she was ready to go.

Sarah and Kat were right on time and without any further delay the girls reached the destination point.

-This was a mistake – y/n stated the very second they reached the entrance.

-Oh, come on, girl, you can’t back out now. Besides, it’s only gonna get better, you’ll see.

-Ladies, less talking, more partying – Sarah grabbed her friends and dragged them both inside.

There were so many people. Like the club was just completely full, despite the fact that it was middle of the week. This seemed abstract to y/n, who was always mature to quote her own words.

-I don’t feel good – she stated again as the crowd surrounded her pulling her towards the dance floor. – I’m gonna…. I think I’m gonna grab us some drinks, if that’s ok with you two.

-I could use a beverage – Sarah said – but you’re not going alone. We’re in this together and besides it’s better to watch each other backs, you never know what can happen.

- Sarah’s right – Kat chimed in as the girls elbowed their way through the crowd– I’ve heard enough stories about roofies to make me not want to be a part of one. Bartender! – she yelled – three shots of vodka, por favor.

-Since when do you speak Spanish?

- Since I’m trying to complete my Spanish outlook. Don’t you think it suits me? – Kat turned around. With her curly dark hair, red lipstick and tight dress she did in fact look Spain-like. As for Sarah she choose a mini skirt and strapless shirt and her hair was straightened and shiny.

- Yeah, it does – y/n took a sip of her drink suddenly feeling heavy underdressed.

- Oh no, no, no. – Kat pointed a finger towards her friend – no long face. I can read your mind, I know what you are thinking right now.

- Really? Please, enlighten me.

- You think yourself to not fit in this place. You believe you are a duff, don’t you?

- Wow. That was painful, Kat, seriously. And completely unnecessary – Sarah smacked the brunette.

-What? I’m just telling that’s how y/n feels, I never say that’s true.

-You can be such an idiot, Kat – Sarah rolled her eyes – come on, y/n let’s hit the dancefloor. This will cheer you up.

- Yeah, I’m gonna stay here for a while if you don’t mind. But you go, go have fun – I’ll join you in a minute, I promise.

When Kat and Sarah started dancing it was captivating. Their moves were intoxicating and capturing the attention of everyone around them – both man and woman. y/n was both jealous of her friends’ sex appeal and proud to be with them and sad that she herself would probably never get to be like that.

-Have you seen that red head? Man, she is hot – y/n heard a man across the bar, clearly talking about Sarah

-You don’t stand a chance man – the other one laughed – I think you might as well take your chances with her friend. You know, the one in blue, right there – he pointed a finger towards y/n. – She’s watching us right now. Poor thing, with that look she will be alone for the rest of her life. Nobody would want to touch her with that look.

Once again y/n felt sick to her stomach. Hearing something like that was brutal and her first instinct was to flee the club, get back to her house and lay down on the bed with some good book. However, doing something like that would be like handing the argument to her tormentors. Y/n finished her drink, put the glass on the counter with a loud bang, and joined her dancing friends. Loosing herself in the music and the movement she completely forgot where she was, until she felt a hand sneaking on her waist and a strong arm pulling her outside the building into the dark alley. A little overwhelmed and light headed she had no power to oppose to whoever it was.

-Let go off me – she finally yelled as the cool air brought her back to reality.

-That one’s feisty – a man laughed – she’s gonna be a good starter before we hook up with her friends. – this was one of the group who was laughing at her at the bar, the girl now recognized him clearly.

- Trust me, you don’t want to do this – she spoke calming herself, even though her hands were shaking a little bit.

-And why is that, little one? What exactly is stopping me? I’m a man and you are a woman, you have no say in what I’m about to do.

-Honestly, I have no idea in what century you’re living, but it’s 2022. Women are actually equal to men, it not… better and definitely smarter – she smirked

- Careful, doll. Me and my friend may have quite a different opinion on that – he spated as three other man started to surround their prey.

- Once again - you don’t want to do this.

-Oh, we do – with one step the man was right in front of the girl, grabbing her wrist, while the other squeezed her waist.

-Damn it, don’t say I didn’t warn you all.

Y/n was quick to turn around and kicking the man behind in the groins causing him to fall to the ground. Then she quickly moved towards the one grabbing her arm, using the other to punch him straight into the nose. As for the other two - one got a kick from a half turn which left him mazed and the other, who was bold enough to come directly at her trying to use some hand movement was knocked off his feet when y/n popped a squat and made a single leg movement. With all her punched and kick all of the men was soon lying on the ground lifeless. Even though she was safe now, the girl was shaking a bit, all of the emotions now getting out.

-y/n! – Sarah and Kat flounced off the club looking for her, terror on their faces visible when they noticed some unconscious men on the ground – what happened? Are you ok?

-Yes! – y/n started laughing frantically – Honestly I’ve never been better.

-But… but what happened? Did you do this? – Kat pointed at the surroundings.

-Not to brag, but yes, this was my doing.

-How? I didn’t know you know how to fight

- I watch a lot of Cobra Kai, you know. After some time you learn some useful movement – y/n grinned. – Anyway I think I have enough for one night, I’m heading home. But you were right, this was fun.

-Wait, y/n you can’t walk alone at night. I’m gonna give you a lift, so ….

Before she could finish her sentence, a tall, broody man came from the shadows.

-I’ll be taking care of miss y/n, now – he spoke in dark yet silky voice.

- And who may you be, sir – Kat defensive attitude got the best of her.

- Hold the fire, Kat – y/n reassured her – he’s a … an acquaintance. I’m gonna go with him, I think I’ll be safe.

- You think? – Sarah hissed – that’s not enough for me. I’m not letting my friend get into any more trouble.

-I know how to defense myself, remember? – y/n didn’t bother mentioning that her little karate trick would be nothing against the Lord of the Dreams. – I’m gonna be fine, I promise. I got backup – she nodded as a certain Raven flew from the sky and sat right on the girls arm.

-Fine. But call me as soon as you get home. This is all weird like hell. – Kat and Sarah turned around, got into the car and drove away while y/n turned towards her visitor.

- Hello Dream, what brings you to the Waking, now?

@marvelsmylife

@wickedly-grim

@mind-of-a-girl

@thereeallink

@lisacarolined

@boofy1998

@endlessdreamqueen

@mikariell95

@shadowluna25

@sippysthoughts

@kaoriloveskeiff

@venomsvl

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kiindr · 5 months

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Hey I wanted to just kinda share my success story here because I think it's important for people to hear

Trigger warnings for suicidal thoughts, self harm, eating disorder, being young, mild sexual harassment, anti-depressants, anxiety meds, and sedatives, toxic relationships ('romantic' but it was petty and short, so I'd say mostly friendships), and talking about therapy and mental hospitals.

- Just turned 15 recently (Present)

*FIRST YEAR*

- Was 11, in 6th grade, when covid hit hard

- Sister has mild disability in her legs so my family was extremely extremely cautious to not catch the 19 because viruses trigger it

- At this time my thoughts were as follows:

"Emotions make me weak"

"Crying is a sign that I'm not strong and confident"

"If I can just get rid of these god damn emotions I can manipulate and gaslight my way through life and be successful"

- I was so desperate for attention I would seek out negative attention. And not sexual negative attention or doing weird stuff... I mean I would sit in gaming chat rooms and tell people to insult me for hours.

- I didn't know crap about mental health at the time

*SECOND YEAR*

7th grade. 13. My lowest. God, so fucking low.

- Still desperately sought out negative attention. I was the weird girl and the pick-me girl in one. I was convinced that if I just brushed off every insult and wrongdoing to me, I'd be "chill" and "fun"

- Hang out with people that used me as entertainment when they were bored, yelling at me and degrading me and insulting me and the worst part is that I LIKED it because I was just so damn lonely

- Started dating some boy. He was 12 I was 13. We never really talked to each other. We were making out before he ever said he wanted to be my boyfriend.

- Soon he was pushy, and disgusting. He would dry hump me, rut against me, spit into my mouth, squeeze my throat...

- And I never said no. Because I was so scared of losing what I had convinced myself was someone who actually loved me.

- But when I tried to 'lightheartedly' protest, or struggle or try to get out of his grip, he would grab me and pin me down and no matter how much I tried to escape he would just force me not to move and he didn't ever actually penetrate me but dear lord that horny ass 12 year old boy had boners more often than not. I didn't tell anyone bc I was scared that they'd be mad that I didn't tell them sooner.

- Also went through a huge identity crisis. It wasn't because I was trans, it was because I wasn't allowing myself to be me so I didn't feel like ME and so I turned to the easy thing. At one point I was "Demiaro pan genderfluid trigender"... I'm just a cis lesbian though.

- My thoughts at this time are as follows:

"Oh."

"I don't care."

"Eh"

"It is what it is"

"I want to sleep"

"I wish I was sleeping right now"

"I can't be here, I have to go"

*SECOND PART OF SECOND YEAR, WORST TIME OF MY LIFE*

- I hate my body. I dont eat all day long. I don't eat lunch at school and told my friends I prefer to eat at home and at home told them the opposite.

- I can't take it one day and I cut myself with a dull old xacto knife.

-It's addictive. I've been punching myself for ages, but cutting is completely different. It made me feel like everything would be okay... for a few seconds... and then I'd look down and all there would be is blood and a rusty blade and a mark that will never be erased.

- I begin to feel suicidal. I think about how much easier it would be to just not exist. I sleep 24/7 so I dont have to be conscious

- I begin to throw up all my food to try to be skinnier

- I progress, I'm fantasizing about killing myself and I'm writing out 3rd person blurbs of me doing it. I drew it too. It was all that consumed my thoughts. It wasn't long until I couldnt trust myself at all to be alone for a minute.

- Living is just so hard. I couldn't describe it then, and I can't describe it now. There are simply no words that will begin to encompass the sheer delusional, wrenching, miserable agony of what that low low feels like. I am positively amazed at 13 year old me for every day she woke up and lived.

- Im missing 1-2 days of school every week. My grades drop, hard

- We try a new anxiety med with my therapist that is known to potentially cause suicidal thoughts. I see it as my chance

- In a month my parents are checking in with me, making sure I don't feel suicidal

- I kindly inform them that I, in fact, am. Very.

- I sleep in their bed at night. I silently get in and we turn the lights out and we all silently cry ourselves to sleep every night.

- I come foward about everything

- We switch meds, I'm getting treated for not OCD but now depression and the likes

- The biggest thing in my life was recovering. Every day I worked SO fucking hard to recover. Every time I opened my eyes in the morning, or put on clean clothes or went to school or took a shower or said hello to someone or finished my homework or ate something was a MASSIVE battle. It was so tiring. I was SO tired.

*THIRD YEAR*

- Over the summer, I'm able to continue to work on myself without worrying about school, it helps a ton.

-Come the school year I'm 6 months free of self harm, no longer suicidal, and eating healthy and balanced meals. I'm into fitness, as running became my coping mechanism for self harm urges (Because running is horrible 💀). I'm going to school almost all days and I'm dropping friends that were bad for me and open myself to new friends.

- It's still hard, I still struggle with my OCD and severe social anxiety, but the depression is so so much better.

- My birthday comes. I'm turning 14. It was so amazing... I was excited for it.

I was EXCITED FOR IT.

I CARED.

I was excited to see my family and I was excited to have a yummy dinner and I was excited to open Presents! I didn't feel like a burden or like gifts for me was a waste of money and my party a waste of time.

This happens at Christmas too. It's so hopeful for me.

- I dunk back into depression towards the end of the school year but resurface a few weeks into summer even better

- We take month long vacation where me and my lil sis have full access to the city and everything while my parents work in our camper. This was so impactful on my social anxiety. I was empowered by my independence.

*NOW*

- I've learned to set boundaries

- I have a healthy friend group with wonderful communication

- I feel HAPPY at least once every day (!) and I let myself cry and it feels so good to let it out and I let myself be sad or angry or dissapointed

- Im not afraid to ask for what I need (Okay well I'm afraid but I've learned to cope with that fear and do it anyway). People like me BETTER when I just ASK for water when I'm thirsty, or I just ask if I'm allowed to use their TV, or I just ask for some milk because Asian food is too powerful for me (😔).

- I have learned how to NOT give advice and just listen. I can hear someone's problems and not want to fix them.

- I have learned what I can and cannot control

So, in summary, I was just in the PITS and I am in awe of myself for my recovery but I am BETTER now. I feel GOOD.

The biggest piece of advice I have to anyone struggling with suicidal thoughts is to think about how PROUD future you will be of you for every day you hold on. Future you will try to give you hugs and comfort and they cant... not until you reach them. Future you is watching from above and sees your path to recovery but in the thick of it you can't see it. Future you is counting on you. Don't let them down. Just, hold on. They deserve a chance right?

(I'm sure this is littered with typos so I'm sorry about that, I don't have the energy to check right now, it's kinda late and I have to get up early)

♡

i love this!

i am so proud of you!

#ask #recovery story #mental health #mental health awareness #mental health support #mental health reminders #coping #reminders #therapy #positivity #kindness #wellness

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teal-raccoon · 6 months

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You know, something I’ve realized lately is that it’s really difficult to not end up alone. I’m already awful at maintaining positive, healthy relationships. When my friends are doing something as a group, I end up in doing something else, still relatively isolated despite being surround by the people I supposedly like. I can’t stand human interaction, but I’m also clingy as shit. I can leave people in a heartbeat, and usually? I feel nothing. All of my connections are superficial. I am an actor. I am fake. I am not real. I am not a person. I am detached. I do not deserve connection because I will break every bond and feel no remorse for my actions. I like to see people suffer. I enjoy torment. I am sick. I am a monster. I am a freak. I think it’s better that way. If I distance myself, I can’t hurt anyone. If I distance myself, I’m just weird. Beast in a cage. I’m always saying I want a relationship, but I never bother to put in the effort. I hate myself to much. I’m never good enough. This one guy I liked? My friend also liked him. I just decided to stand by and let her do what she wants. I’m a fucking background character. I don’t matter. That’s good. No one will remember me. That’s good. People don’t remember my name. I change my hair, now I’m a stranger. Am I that unremarkable? Good. Nobody will notice when I die in a ditch somewhere after doing everything I’m not supposed to do. Good.

I like calling myself a slut, a whore, a hoe, a faggot, etc. Why? Because I crave intimacy. Why? Because it’s the only way I can think to love. I can’t love. I don’t know why. I don’t love. I only objectify myself to the point where I call myself an ‘it.’ Am I really nonbinary? Maybe not! Maybe I just want to be a pretty body and an empty heart. Maybe I shouldn’t eat so much. Maybe I should be skinnier. I wish I were a real boy. I don’t want this. I don’t want my body. I want to be real. I want to feel real. I want to be somebody people actually think about. I want to be known. How do I achieve that? It isn’t through school, that’s for sure. Maybe I’ll be the kid who shows up to parties and makes the seniors give it their vodka. Maybe I already am. Maybe I want to hurt myself. Maybe I already do.

God, I really hope he hates me.

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jirwemthegreat · 6 months

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Oh! Hey! Been a minute!

…

……

… I finished him.

This is Krillissssk, the Ilion’s security officer. Krill’ to his cohorts if you want to incur his wrath (you don’t, but people do it anyway). He’s a 7’3 insectoid alien from the planet Beelzebub. Prideful. Quick to anger. Enjoys a challenge. Serves Is in the employment of lesser life forms vertebrates. Harder to kill than an armed Cockroach and five times as deadly. Probably sounds like some variety of Scott McNeil!

Believe it or not: despite the non-human face, he’s VERY good at speaking English (well, more so than Paz anyway)! Thanks to a complexly articulated larynx that allows his species to terrifyingly mimic the calls of their prey, he can even do a spot on impression of YOU🫵!

BTS Notes: His coloration is actually based off of the Mjolnir Security Officer from Bungie’s Marathon trilogy. It was almost bright green until I realized I already had two other characters who had that same color…

This was also before I learned how to use vectors… yeah… he was also much skinnier!

But thanks again to—

…

Oh god should I even mention them here..? What are the odds that they’ll block me here too? I’m a firm believer in credit where it’s due, but they told me they consider these sketches mine even though they’re clearly not. They’ll probably see this, too… I wish I could talk to them again… They’re not just an artist, they’re one of my best friends… I wish I could clear the water, find out why they’re blocking me… I fear it’s shown above…

Whatever. Look in previous posts for the artist. It’s the same one. They were a big help in redesigning Krillissssk and designing a lot of my other characters too. They’re very talented and helpful.

Well, hopefully I’ll finish my villain dump soon! For now: That’s my main cast! Maybe I’ll find someone to help me design my ship, too. I’d do it myself, but I’ve been struggling with it…

More to come, I think!

#ocs #scifi #procreate #art #giant insect #alien #alien oc #he sounds like Dinobot from Beast Wars #fun fact: he and Paz almost had their roles swapped!#I got kinda derailed there…#I’m in kinda a state right now lol #message me back pardner… meowdy…#Ngl I thought I had already posted this…

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lacroxton · 7 months

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Automatic Autonomic Automated Vending Machine

One of my favorite fics I wrote and also the first translation I tried. Inspired by Cyberpunk 2077, Death Stranding and Atomic Heart, it's a story about freedom, promises and the post apocalypse Terra with Vending Machine Exusiai & Messenger Texas.

Warning: Blood and Gore

Once there was a flood; A surge that gave birth to all life. Once there was a flood; A surge that selected our civilization to survive. And then there was another flood.

The flood that left nothing behind.

Later that night, Texas opened her eyes and saw two men staring at her bed, clutching a hoe and a harpoon respectively. The harpoon's tines touched both sides of her neck, and the soon-to-be murderer was tense and shaky. Texas wasn't sure whether the corners of his compressed lips were laced with excitement because the moonlight was too faint to cast a shadow.

She and Exusiai originally came to this church to escape the sandstorm. The journey to Laterano passes through vast wastelands—places that had never been favoured by Mother Nature, and would never be transformed into mobile cities. The whole world had forgotten them, but God still allowed them to survive, so the people were left with nothing but faith. They gathered together, lingering in groups of three or five, praying. No one knew what they were praying for, but they were confident that a miracle would happen one day.

It was at this time Texas and Exusiai pushed the door in. As luck would have it, this small self-rescue community had just vacated a few beds. Last week, a man had died of a hyena's sharp teeth; a mother and her daughter had died from picking poisonous sandfruits. If the food in the warehouse didn't replenish soon, everyone here would starve to death. Exusiai hence made a proposal: to exchange three nights of safe and sound sleep with hot, yummy meals.

At first, people questioned whether this was some kind of originium arts or tricks unleashed by Texas. They had never seen anyone travel with a vending machine, let alone a talking, enthusiastic, joyful vending machine. The flashing pixels would form an image of a redhead Sankta on the machine's square screen, with up to 24 combinations of facial expressions and an excellent sense of humour beyond the human level. Of course, these extra "add-ons" were shenanigans Exusiai came up with just to sound a little bit cooler. Based on her polymeric converting system, her most crucial core function was actually INSTANT COOKING : you can put any raw materials into the ingredient slot, select the recipe and wait for a few seconds; gourmet foods full of umami will instantly drop out and ready to serve. Wilted rice cobs become hearty rice balls, and expired tuna cans become creamy bowls of tuna soup. If you put in a few shrivelled berries, even the melt-in-your-mouth desserts will no longer be a luxury. Exusiai fulfilled everybody's wishes with a big smile: the first day, and the second day, until eventually, no one questioned her or their own stomach. They praised: these are the best food we have ever eaten in our lives; these are the evidence that God has come to save us.

And that was also why they would never allow the precious happy hour to come to an end. Selfishness let greed swell and fester in their hearts, finally, on the last night, they decided to take possession of Exusiai for themselves and leave Texas to Death.

Luckily, Texas had been acquainted with Death for so many years. The harpoon that choked her could've bounced off the bed, projected back the way it came, and quickly pierced the murderer's heart whenever she wanted. The guy holding a hoe beside him was even skinnier, and wielding an unfamiliar weapon in panic could only backfire. Inertia would cause that weak body to trip over the bricks behind him, inadvertently knocking over a bright oil lamp on the way, until drowning the entire church into a roaring fire.

But before all this could happen, Exusiai's voice drilled into Texas' ears. Texas tilted her head and saw the screen of Exusiai still showing a smiling face; her voice still sounded warm and joyful. She asked those two guys, and everyone in the room who pretended to be asleep: Even if you've taken me for yourselves, how do you know they won't eradicate you the same way they eradicate Texas? How can you be so sure that the fairness everyone promises will indeed be fair?

......We can get through anything as long as the Lord stays with us! Nobody could tell who shouted first in the darkness.

Is that so? Another voice came up, however, retorted, you don't think putting on this face will help you cover the fact that YOU are the thief who steals from the warehouse every chance you get, do you?

As it turns out, people's beliefs are often more vulnerable to suspicion than they could ever imagine, just as fragile as their relationships with each other.

Like something important had suddenly dawned on him, the harpoon was removed from Texas' neck and then dragged slowly toward the tall man guarding the warehouse. The hoe guy also clenched his teeth, turned to aim at the old man lying under the window who always got pardoned from labour duties due to health conditions. Their movements ceased to tremble, so the stone effigies around the church were soon stained with blood. In the midst of yelling, cursing, and killing each other, no one bothered to care that this was a place blessed by God anymore, leaving only dead bodies and pieces of flesh twisted ugly on the floor.

Then, Exusiai selected a few freshly slaughtered tenderloin, had Texas put them in her ingredient slot, removed the bones, and grilled them on both sides to make black pepper patties: crispy outside, juicy inside. Her body wasn't equipped with a gustatory system, therefore couldn't taste anything, but she hoped Texas would like it.

Such a shame it ended so soon. Exusiai's vocal compartment created a series of chewing noises. I was kinda looking forward to watching Texas fight over me.

There was no need for that. Texas divided the patties into equally small pieces with her originium sword, then sealed and packed them into a leather pouch—which would be her sole food supply for the next two days. If you're willing to go with them, she said, I won't interfere much.

What if I'm NOT willing?

The pixels that make up Exusiai's pupils had narrowed, so that her eyes could scan every frame of Texas' movements, watching her light a cigarette by the remaining flame of the oil lamp.

The cigarette seemed to have damped too badly. Texas lowered her eyebrows in silence for a long time before finally exhaling the first puff of mist.

She thought for a moment and said to Exusiai, then I will guarantee your freedom.

For a long time, Texas couldn't be sure whether adding the word "freedom" to her vocabulary would be a change for the better. But, she must admit that ever since she met Exusiai, "freedom" had always been intertwining with her life.

When she thought back to that day, Texas' memory was already a little fuzzy. She hadn't eaten a full meal for probably five or six days straight, so hungry that she couldn't even spell out a word, and every breath of air she took only made her stomach emptier. Her car crashed far away, and her package was destroyed in a cave even further. At the end of the day, only half piece of hardtack was left in her pocket. But that was the last straw Texas could grasp. She couldn't eat it yet, not in such a rush. She just needed to find a roof in the ruins of this nameless city to rest for a while; so that when she woke up, the illusion sleep brings to her brain would allow her to hold on for another day.

Texas leaned against a broken wall covered in mud and dust. She knew no one would come to save her. No one would rescue a messenger who failed her mission. Not before The Silence , and sure not for fifty years after it. The only hope was the golden sunset shining on her cheeks; Texas exhaustedly shut her eyelids, wishing it would bring her a sweet dream.

Then it brought back a terrible chunk of brownie. And a very talkative vending machine.

Exusiai had so many things to say, as if she was trying to list out all the details that did and did not happen to her life in a single sentence. She said she hadn't met a living human for fifty years—spent thirty years drifting in the sea, and twenty years drying out on the land after the flood receded. The good thing for her was that Sankta's ancestors, Aggeloi, were a kind of inorganic swarming construct floating in space, which led the modern technology of Laterano to be waterproof, and not even have to rely on electricity. By solely absorbing cosmic radiation, Laterano machines could function perfectly under almost every circumstance; some newer models could also disassemble, reorganize, polymerize, and activate any substance on the molecular level.

By conducting hundreds of millions of calculations for armageddon, Sankta's God, the supercomputer under The Basilica, had ultimately decided that the Digital Life Project was the best option with higher success rates. Even if their paradise got annihilated by the Seaborns, and their primary network connection got cut forcibly—as long as a certain number of angels' consciousness was successfully uploaded, one day, the Sanktas would return to their homeland and continue the Laterano civilization.

Exusiai was one of them.

Her consciousness was uploaded to a vending machine, which had no mobility whatsoever, nothing but to lie on her back in the ocean currents, looking up at the sky. Therefore, Exusiai had only been to places where the wind took her. The seawater licked her metal surface and plated it white with infinite waves of salt. Time has never been slower than the years stuck between gears. The wait was too long for the Sanktas to maintain their sober soul; so far, Exusiai had received 1099 neural signals from the other machines shutting themselves down—signals of solid, mutual emotions constructed by the shared memories of Sankta, which is also the confirmation of the very faith of being alive.

Every time these signals dissipated, it felt like some dull, gloomy, lifeless light spots distantly fell across the horizon. But Exusiai was looking up at the sky still. Waiting, expecting, humming while counting the seconds, and fifty years passed just like that.

Until Texas' elbow accidentally touched her button.

Exusiai said she had nothing else to give Texas as a courtesy for their first meeting, and her ingredients, the residue of fruits and dirt dropped inside her slot during all these years, were barely enough to make a brownie. It's probably gonna taste bad as hell, Exusiai added, but at least you wouldn't die from eating that.

Texas wolfed it down almost immediately. She was so, so hungry that her tastebuds no longer distinguish between good and bad, mistaking the sweetness of blood in her saliva for a chocolate flavour. She even ripped off a couple pieces of skin on her mouth as she rolled down the grassy crumbs with her teeth.

Then she licked the corners of her dry, cracked lips and asked Exusiai why would you save me, using a voice as hoarse as broken bellows.

Simple. Said Exusiai, scrutinizing the employee name tag on Texas' chest. The plastic seal was severely scratched, and so did Texas' entire body, as it was tattered and torn, revealing scabbed wounds on her shoulders and tail. I need a messenger to get me to Laterano.

But verbal promise never equals trustworthiness, Exusiai. Texas could feel the thirst now; taking carbohydrates all of a sudden with a flimsy stomach wall apparently triggered some acid reflux up to her throat. For example, I might promise you first, then drop you in the middle of nowhere halfway through.

It's your freedom to do what you want, Texas. Just like it's my freedom to trust a starving ghost lying next to Death. Exusiai didn't tell Texas what she really trusted was a pair of eyes that couldn't lie.

Then what? Texas asked. Those eyes lit up for a rare second. After I get you to Laterano?

Then a REAL piece of strawberry shortcake, of course. Said Exusiai. But if I'm in a good mood, I might also be merciful and share half of it with you.

The Lupo without a home and the Sankta without a human body had been on a long journey together ever since.

The vending machine's weight was lighter than expected. Texas quickly scavenged some iron parts and fabrics from the wreckage of the surrounding buildings; Exusiai's polymeric converting system then polished them into a brand new cart with four wheels and two strong straps. Using the rest of the materials, she even tailored a new set of well-fitting clothes for Texas. It was still a long, long way from Laterano, so they spent the daytime walking in sunlight and nighttime under the tarp by a campfire. When Texas fell asleep, Exusiai would dim her screen and lay on the ground, counting the stars.

Exusiai also cooked many, many meals for Texas. From burger and soda combo to fettuccine alfredo, from apple cheese tart to creamy mushroom soup, the chef's recommendation never repeats itself. Although the truth was, these were the foods that Exusiai wanted to eat the most, and yet she couldn't, so sending Texas to collect different ingredients and cook them was the only effective placebo for her cravings. After Texas finished a dish, Exusiai would also force her to comment on it, as if she were some kind of a regular cast on a cooking show.

Texas remembered she had watched something just like this on an old VCR when she used to eat earthworm burritos and cricket jerky back at the shelters in Columbia. That show must be about 60 to 70 years old, even older than The Silence , and the person in front of the camera with a microphone, known as the host, would use a crazy amount of fancy words to describe whatever dish served to her. In the same way that "a steak without wine isn't a good steak," all of the diners captured on screen must also demonstrate an exaggerated nodding, smiling face as if the deliciousness has blown their mind away. Nobody ever found out if those foods were indeed that delicious.

However, Exusiai's 24 pixel combinations didn't allow for such precise facial expressions. Her screen would only display a progress bar below her complacent grin—accompanied by a short piece of electric punk music that runs way off-key at the end of the bar. She was clearly neither a good host nor a good singer.

Texas, on the other hand, was neither a critic nor a liar. So she simply rated every single dish Exusiai cooked her as "tasty".

Time flew by, and they met many other people along the way, leaving new stories with new encounters. Although the flood had receded for twenty years, it was still hard for people's hearts to sprout again from the barrenness. At first, they were tormented by the never-ending hunger and fear. Then, they spent countless days and nights tearing down the fortress besieged. Finally, they returned to the surface, only to find out they must work even harder to keep themselves alive. Everything else was torturous, only the stories were glamorous, so people immediately embraced a new faith. These stories then spread further and further through the winds of the wilderness.

When the neural signal of the last Sankta's death had reached Exusiai, people started praising again: a newborn God had come to this world. God is among the machinery, with a grey wolf guarding her side. Wherever they go, there will be no worries or troubles; Wherever they stay, that place shall be the home of all joy.

People voluntarily elected the talking, enthusiastic, joyful vending machine to wield the sceptre of salvation for all mankind.

The only remaining Sankta therefore walked on earth, stretched her wings and halo, as she had become the living Laterano.

Sadly, the results of being at the center of attention were often mixed between good and bad, Texas was well aware of that. As many people accept their existence, there will only be more people coming after them, and that's how every story ends. Whenever God seems to tilt the scale to one side, those who desire to be favoured but have not been granted will automatically gather on the other side. The center of the scale is engraved with war. No one ever realized that wars have always arisen from people themselves, and have nothing to do with God, nor with Exusiai.

But Texas was not the type to guess at people's hearts. Whatever side people showed her, she would believe it until they betrayed her. That's why Texas was always covered in blood. Mostly from other people, occasionally from her own, with the crimson slicing her forehead open, drenching her hair and burying her heavy eyelids. Exusiai stood just behind her, acting as a solid wall, letting crimson handprints blend into her crimson metal. That wall was uncomfortable to lean on, and it was even colder to the touch than stone bricks, but the key selling point was that the wall could tell a lot of corny jokes. Exusiai's excellent sense of humour put Texas at ease.

While waiting for Exusiai to prepare dinner, Texas unprecedentedly had a sweet dream.

The dream was of a certain cafe recommended by another cooking show. Texas had never been to a cafe, only seen it on videotape, so the whole place was covered with an old film-like filter. But Texas did drink coffee. She remembered the coffee at the shelter as a liquid very bitter, very sour, and very astringent with no aroma at all. Not sure why it was so popular other than it keeps people awake. Thinking that maybe real coffee wasn't like this, Texas ordered another cup of brew in her dream, but it still tasted the same. She frowned, and her tail froze briefly, only to be watched by her tablemate, stifling a laugh while letting out a long gulp of air.

Texas lifted her head up. The girl on the other side of the table looked like a Sankta, with a halo, wings, striking red hair, a cheeky face and beautiful eyes. Texas didn't think she had ever met this girl before. But the subconscious reaction of the brain soon let Lupo know that the angel in front of her was indeed Exusiai. Perhaps it was because she had a delicate piece of strawberry shortcake in her hand.

Then, Exusiai took Texas's coffee cup, tore open a few small paper sacks and plastic wrappings, poured sugar and milk into it, tasted it first, and stirred it evenly with a wooden stick. This time, Texas couldn't taste the bitterness anymore. It wasn't sour, wasn't astringent, and the coffee became nutty and sweet for the first time. A sweetness that Texas could understand.

Humans are supposed to eat together. Using a mysterious tone, Exusiai in the dream scooped off the corner tip of the cake and handed it to Texas. With a voice no longer being mechanically compressed, every expression and movement of hers was so smooth. Curious about this Exusiai's touch, Texas then reached one hand out to her and realized that Exusiai's skin was much softer than her own.

If there's no one joining the table, Exusiai stopped for a while, even the best food could be unappetizing.

Texas had to admit that Exusiai was right. She realized with hindsight that her tastes had sweetened over the time being with Exusiai—she even seemed to have become a little bit like Exusiai, with a pleasant glimmer of expectation for tomorrow.

She hoped, when they arrived at Laterano, that half piece of strawberry shortcake would be just as good as the one in her dream.

Texas woke up, only to find herself lingering in that same dream once again. The light of dusk stung her eyes. She tried to stand up, but the sharp pain and exhaustion coming from all parts of her body kept tugging her down, making her realize that struggling was nothing more than a futile waste of time.

So she had to strain to roll her eyeballs and hold open her blood-slicked vision, looking around.

She was surrounded by broken statues and marble columns. Collapsed church steeples in her far distance; scarred stained glass windows and stone arches in her near distance. The building's unusual solid structure caused one-third of it to survive the devastating crash from The Silence , whereas the other ruined two-thirds had the setting sun spilling in, wrapped around by gravel.

Texas leaned against a pure, white forest. Her memories were finally starting to flow again, which was a good thing, but what wasn't so good was the large amount of viscous blood gushing out along with it. She looked down, and the bleeding holes in her body then followed suit, loosened and gurgled like a dying crimson brook, one bubble after another. Texas's clothes were tattered and torn again. Only this time, the murderers were more skillful than ever. They had waited with more cunning and purpose, laying an early ambush around Laterano, armed at military grade enough to suggest that the still-functioning secret government had sent them on this mission. Texas couldn't quite understand why a force of this size had still yet to be used on rebuilding mobile cities.

And of course, none of that mattered anymore. The crushed arm, the thigh impaled from the crook of the knee, the ripped-open liver and intestines brushed by the warm wind, none of those things mattered anymore. Texas moved her tongue laboriously, letting the blood slide across her tastebuds with her weak breath. What mattered was that she couldn't taste anything any longer.

She lost her mobility, lost her sense of taste, lying on her back, looking up at the sky, and became just as wretched as Exusiai. Texas apologized for the half piece of cake. She poked out a few fingers, broken but barely retaining the sensation, and started touching the ground, searching for the metallic surface that made her feel at peace. Her colour had long been redder than the paint on the vending machine. But Exusiai didn't say a word. She stood quietly beside Texas; as if she was just a solid wall.

Their story was never supposed to end like this.

The Sankta had sung all the songs she could, told all the corny jokes she had, and made all the food she was able to, but the Lupo right in front of her wasn't getting any better because of it. Even though Exusiai's screen clearly possessed 24 different combinations of expressions—no matter how often she switched these pixel arrangements, none of them could accurately convey the absurdly huge sense of powerlessness that had descended upon her. She judged that her internal programming had made an unfixable error, or how else would she have only learned by now, that waiting for someone to die had turned out to be so hard.

Let's just......go with the joyful face then. Texas said softly, sounding like a dimming bonfire.

Then the joy returned to Exusiai's screen. She saw the corners of Texas' mouth lift gently upward as well—Texas looked so pretty when she smiled. Exusiai thought to herself, that if her happiness could make Texas happy too, she wouldn't mind being happy forever. She just felt confused at the same time. If Texas actually died, but there was no empathy link between Lupo and Sankta, hence no light spot belonging to Texas falling across the horizon—then how exactly should Exusiai mourn her?

But Texas had made her choice long ago.

She held onto the vending machine's shell, fingers sluggishly climbing upwards, bit by bit until she reached Exusiai's ingredient slot. Having the ability to polymerize and reorganize any substance meant that, even without the supercomputer's core connected, Exusiai could recreate her original body anytime, free of mechanical constraints, if she just used a living human of comparable mass as blueprints and raw materials. Texas had known that from the beginning. She also knew that the fact Exusiai had never brought this up, was because they promised to go to Laterano together. For the cake, apparently.

A pair of eyes that couldn't lie and a mouth telling only the truth. The same goes for both Exusiai and Texas. So, Texas chose to honour the other promise she made to the Sankta.

......Eat me up, Exusiai. One of Texas' arms stuck into the vending machine, and the other encircled the shell. She finally managed to straighten her neck, then pressed her groggy head against the conversion button, shivering, face turning sideways. As the soft Lupo ears snugly against Exusiai's hot metal surface, all she could hear was the creaking sound of mechanical parts and the off-key music singing "now processing" to the air.

I WILL GUARANTEE YOUR FREEDOM.

The human in the story closed her eyes in relief and chose to give God a hug.

Exusiai's gears mashed through Texas' young body at full speed. Hair, flesh, organs, and all different kinds of bones. In the iteration of death and rebirth, the piercing roar flew over Texas's lightly scratched ulna, half-healed ribs, worn-out cartilages and spiderweb-cracked femur......But without any exception, every bone of her was holy white, the same colour as those sun-bathed stone tiles on the dome of the Memorial Hall. They were reduced to pieces in unison with a short notification tone, becoming sustenance for Exusiai, light and airy, just like the last bit of frosting sprinkled on a dessert.

As the remnants of the secret operation squad scoured the ruins, the bloodied Lupo with two originium swords had already disappeared. Instead, a true Sankta with wings and halo pointed a pitch-black rifle at their nose.

Sankta's hair was striking red.

Sankta's eyes were beautifully shined.

Yet in this golden sunset, no one could truly see Sankta's face.

Exusiai could never figure out, why they had such a look of fear on their faces when she simply just returned all the arrows, bullets and originium arts back to where they belonged?

Unfortunately, the only Texas who knew the answer to that question could no longer answer her. It was as if Texas had never been born on this earth—and no one, no one except Exusiai, knew about her name, her past, or her future. The last thing left to prove that she had existed, was the tattered and torn clothes on Exusiai. The gift that Texas had worn for a long, long time, and now it had finally been gifted back to the owner.

The sunset had come to an end.

In the long night, Exusiai tucked her hands into her pockets, dragging her narrow shadow forward, alone.

Ahead of her, was The Basilica of Laterano that buried the supercomputer's core; And behind her, was nothing but a silent, barren, white and lonely land.

Strawberry shortcake didn't seem so delicious all of a sudden, Exusiai said to herself, thoughts interrupted by a small, firm chunk hidden deep in her pockets.

—Exusiai found the half piece of hardtack in Texas' jacket.

Doing her best to mimic the movements of Texas, Exusiai peeled off the outer wrapping and took a bite, chewing very, very slowly. Tens of thousands of taste signals on her tongue fed back to her brain, that it was "salty with a hint of sweetness". Perhaps sesame was also on the ingredient list, but time and the poor assembly line had far grounded away its aroma. It tasted hard and certainly dry, with crumbs flying everywhere in her mouth. Definitely didn't look good enough for an appealing advertisement.

But the flavour was so familiar. Exusiai thought, fingers rubbing against the fabric.

Till she eventually realized it was the flavour of being alive.

It was the flavour of Texas.

Exusiai then shed her first tear, declaring that hardtack was the most delicious food on earth.

END.

Lacroxton

#texusiai #ektk #Texas #Exusiai #arknights #arknights texas #arknights exusiai #post apocalypse

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