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staytheb · 1 year

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Change of Plans

Pairing: ATZ’s Seonghwa x OC [Yiseul] || ATZ’s Hongjoong x OC [Yiyeon] Genre: idol!au, slice of life, slight fluff Word Count: 2,402 Summary: The sisters had a change of plans about their flight out of the country, but it’s just that they didn’t inform their idol boyfriends about it.

Warning: none

hi! it’s been a while, but i realized that i haven’t written anything new in so long and it’s been due to a very eventful year this year. other than that, so i finally got around to writing a piece due to the winter holiday! i needed to get something out before the year end and so here we are. luckily, i had the two oldest of ATEEZ in mind and this came out. so yeah, happy reading and kthxbai, Admin Lia~

Yiseul entered Yiyeon's room at five in the morning.

"Hey." She called out softly.

Yiseul opened the door wider to allow the lights from the hallway to illuminate her sister's bedroom instead of turning on the actual lights.

"Yeon."

Yiyeon groggily heard her name being called while fluttering her eyes open and slowly turned towards her bedroom door.

"Hmm?"

Yiseul walked in further while taking a seat at her sister's desk chair.

"So, there's been a change of plans."

Yiyeon now sat up in bed, facing her sister.

"What plans?"

"We're not going on the trip with Dad and Mom."

"Why?"

Yiyeon rubbed her face, tiredly as she ran a hand through her hair.

Yiseul also ran a hand through her hair before replying.

"Remember how I told you that our flight got switched at the last minute last night, right?"

"Yeah."

"I went to check-in for it and it got switched to another gate. Then that flight got delayed and now it just got cancelled a while ago."

"Wow, that's so dumb. So, what now?"

"Just waiting for the airlines to refund me."

"Mom and Dad?"

"I messaged them, telling them we're not joining them in Sydney to fly to L-A."

"I see, I see. Oh, well. Too bad we can't meet Hanjun and Rosalie to help plan out their wedding in person."

"True, but we can catch up with them in the summer."

"Oh, yeah, true."

"Anyway, I was gonna book a new one, but it's more pricey and neither of us has the funds to cover it."

"Ugh, lame." Yiyeon groaned as she lay back down.

"At least we can spend our first Christmas and New Year with our boyfriends."

"I would rather still celebrate it by myself this year." Yiyeon declared as Yiseul just shot her sister with a knowing look.

"He won't let you celebrate it without him."

"He'll be fine since he won't know I didn't leave for the trip after all. Besides, they have those year-end awards to attend, prepare for their next comeback, and even prepare for their European tour. So, he's gonna be busy and have no time to bother me."

"Kim Hongjoong would be very sad that his girlfriend doesn't wanna spend time with him."

"He's an idol. ATINY and his members can keep him occupied. Anyway, leave me alone and go hang out with Park Seonghwa for Christmas and New Year instead."

The corners of Yiseul's lips quirk up, but she didn't respond to that and said something else.

"Alright, but we're basically off for the next two weeks and have a lot of free time."

"Which I will enjoy without much in person socialization."

"Fine. Anyway, I might do some Christmas shopping later today if you wanna join me."

"I'll think about it after I wake up for sure, but Christmas is like in two days though."

"Yeah, I know, but since we're not going anywhere, might as well."

"True."

"Yeah, but good night."

"Good night."

Yiseul left Yiyeon's room, closing the door behind her and returning to bed herself.

"Hmm, what should I get today?" Yiseul asked herself as she glanced at the menu before her.

She just got done shopping for gifts and Christmas decorations just so she could take photos to send to their parents and have some prepared when they returned. Even though today became Christmas itself, Yiseul didn't feel like shopping yesterday or the day before that. However, Yiyeon didn't want to do anything either on both days, too, and so she continued to sleep in as well today. It was already two in the afternoon and Yiseul wondered if her sister had woken up by now.

"Should I get donuts, too, or just drinks? Then again, I can always eat the snacks later."

"Hey, beautiful."

She heard a familiar voice say from behind her. Yiseul glanced over her shoulder to see a tall man, wearing a black and white striped shirt with a beige overcoat, and black pants. He also wore a black face mask and a black bucket hat. At first she blanked out on who this person was until she caught his eyes and recognized her idol boyfriend, standing closely behind her. Her face lit up as she smiled and leaned in for a hug while Seonghwa welcomed the warm interaction.

"Hi."

The two giggled as they shared a hug before Seonghwa asked her a question.

"Weren't you supposed to be in another country by now?"

"I was, but things occurred, plans got changed, and now we're here."

"Oh?"

She nudged him playfully.

"I was gonna tell you later."

"But not soon enough as it's now Christmas day."

He cast her with a knowing look as she smiled mischievously at him.

"Yeah something like that, but I would have told you later due to your own busy schedule."

"True."

Seonghwa shot her another smile before remembering something.

"Since you mentioned 'we're here', then I'm assuming that Yiyeon didn't go either, right?"

"Mmhmm." Yiseul responded as her focus went onto the menu.

"Now, what should I order?"

"Oh?"

A sly-like smile graced his face as he pulled out his phone to notify his friend, Hongjoong, of what he just recently learned.

"By the way, Yiseul, do you have plans for later tonight?"

"Yay! The fake Christmas tree is finally up, holiday decorations are up, now let's get something to eat." Yiyeon said to her sister as she rushed to her room to get ready.

Yiseul didn't say anything as she lingered around the living room and admired the area and display she and her sister had spent an hour putting up before heading to her own room to dress up warmly. Yiyeon came out of her room all covered up for the cold night and stared at her sister, confused, upon seeing her sister dressed a little more than casual.

"Um, we're just gonna go down the street. Nothing fancy."

"Well..." Yiseul trailed off, not sure how to tell her sister about another change of plans.

Yiyeon eyed her eyes suspiciously until the doorbell rang and her eyes narrowed knowingly thereafter.

"It's them, huh?"

Yiseul giggled, not responding before making her way to open the door.

"Now I know why he's been blowing up my phone this whole afternoon." Yiyeon muttered as she heard her boyfriend's voice calling out for her.

"Jung Yiyeon!" Hongjoong called her name in a slightly scolding tone due to her ignoring his calls and messages since this afternoon.

"Hi. Bye."

Yiyeon smiled and gave him a small wave before running off to her room with Hongjoong hot on her tail.

"Yah! Jung Yiyeon!"

The other couple could hear Yiyeon laughing in response as the two watched the other pair with their usual antics with each other.

"Should we intervene?" Seonghwa asked as Yiseul shook her head.

"Nah. Let them do their thing." She responded while glancing up at her boyfriend.

"So, where is it that you wanna take me out to?"

Seonghwa grinned underneath his face mask.

"You'll find out soon. Now, let's go."

He offered his arm as she hooked hers along with his as they left, leaving the other couple alone.

"Why didn't you respond to my calls or messages?"

"Because I was sleeping."

"Yeah, that's likely true."

Hongjoong paused in mid-chase upon hearing his girlfriend's response as he and Yiyeon were running around her home with the latter trying to not get caught by the former. Yiyeon for a moment got Hongjoong trapped in her room for a bit, but of course he escaped and now here they were in their living room with Yiseul's fake Christmas tree in-between them. She had paused, too, to catch her breath once she noticed he wasn't chasing her.

"But you could've still responded after you woke up." Hongjoong stated as Yiyeon shrugged.

"Well, it is what it is, Hongjoong."

"No, it's not."

"Okay, yeah, but I didn't feel like it then and I was gonna say something later."

Now, Hongjoong decided to play around with walking to and fro from side to side, causing Yiyeon to be wary of his stance as he could go either way to chase her.

"How much later?"

He eyed her knowingly.

"I mean today is already Christmas and you were supposed to be gone, yet you've been here still for the past couple of days."

"Um, yeah, true, but it is what it is. Besides, you could've waited until tomorrow later, to find out, too."

"After Christmas day."

"Yeah. Like I said, well, it is what is it."

Hongjoong continued to pace back and forth with his eyes set on Yiyeon, firmly. She flashed him a small smile as her eyes continued watching him, cautiously.

"Well, I'm here now, so let's cuddle until tomorrow morning."

"No." Yiyeon declined with a slight frown.

"I was supposed to get food with Yiseul, but instead I have to hang out with you."

"Wow. You make it sound like it's a bad thing."

Hongjoong's jaw dropped as Yiyeon giggled with a shrug.

"I mean, you just get a little too affectionate."

Hongjoong rolled his eyes.

"You've never complained before."

"I'm not complaining. I'm just saying."

Yiyeon chuckled again as Hongjoong slightly pouted before settling on a compromise.

"Fine. Okay. How about I cook for you."

"Uh, no thanks. You can't cook to save your life."

"I..."

Hongjoong immediately closed his mouth, knowing that was true. Taking this as her chance to make an escape, Yiyeon made a run for it. However, Hongjoong caught sight of his girlfriend's movement and without hesitation leapt forward, passed the fake tree, and reaching out to grabbed Yiyeon. Yet, Yiyeon freaked out that her boyfriend would hit the tree that she tried to reach out towards him to move him out of the way, but instead the two got tangled and crashed into the fake tree. Yiyeon's attention went towards the now toppled Christmas tree with widened eyes before glancing over at her idol boyfriend.

"Kim Hongjoong."

Yiyeon glared at her boyfriend as Hongjoong turned his head towards his girlfriend as he continued lying on his back after the incident with a nervous giggle.

"Yes?"

"No more cuddles for you this year."

"Aww, don't be like that."

Before Yiyeon could gather herself up, she suddenly felt herself being tugged against her boyfriend as he wrapped his arms around her tightly.

"I need my cuddles." He mumbled against the crook of her neck as Yiyeon rolled her eyes in good-nature and gave in to the affection.

"Fine, you big baby."

She heard him laugh in victory while repositioning themselves in a more comfortable position on the floor.

"Merry Christmas." Hongjoong wished her with a slight peck to her forehead.

"Merry Christmas, to you, too."

She returned the gesture, but to the left side of his jawline. A moment passed by before Yiyeon ruined their loving moment.

"You do know that we have to fix this before my sister comes home, right?"

Hongjoong groaned before responding.

"Yes, I know, but let's cuddle first and worry later."

He hugged her tightly while nuzzling against her as a ghost of a smile crossed her face and she allowed the sweet moment to settle upon them once again.

Once Yiseul and Seonghwa stepped off the bus onto the lighted evening streets of Cheonggyecheon in the downtown area of Seoul, did Yiseul curiously glanced about their surroundings.

"You're not planning on buying me stuff for me, are you?"

"No." Seonghwa answered with a laugh, but his girlfriend remained alert.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

He cast her a knowing look.

"Besides, I've already got that covered."

Yiseul slightly nudged him.

"I thought we made it clear to get no presents for each other."

"Yes, but I couldn't help it and I had to buy it as I thought of you."

Yiseul groaned.

"Now I feel bad for not giving you anything tomorrow as it's still on its way."

Seonghwa scoffed.

"And you're over here trying to make me the bad guy for getting your a gift."

"Oops."

The couple giggled as they walked hand-in-hand down the Cheonggyecheon stream.

"Anyway, if not shopping, then why come here?"

"The Christmas lights."

"Oh, well, why this one specifically?"

Yiseul motioned with her free hand about her.

"I mean, there are other places that have lights displayed set up elsewhere, too."

Seonghwa smiled, but Yiseul couldn't see, yet she knew it reached his eyes.

"Because you wanted to see it during this time of year."

"I only told Yiyeon that, so how did you find out?"

"Because I pried it out of her after your birthday to plan out something, okay?"

Yiseul laughed as Seonghwa seemed slightly embarrassed about admitting that fact.

"Okay, okay. Thank you."

She held his arm firmly to give him a small squeeze to indicate her appreciation of him doing that for her.

"It's so pretty."

"I know."

Yiseul had meant the holiday light display around them while Seonghwa's words had meant someone else. Still, the couple walked cozily together about the area, blending in with the other couples and tourists also out and about during this festive time of year. Luckily, Seonghwa's disguise became obscured due to the lighting and everyone focusing on the light display. Yiseul's own face covering aided in making them stand out less as well.

"C'mon, let's get some dinner." Seonghwa suggested.

"Oh, I got that covered."

Yiseul showed her phone to her boyfriend.

"Just put in an order for bulgogi, sweet potato noodles, kimchi, tteokguk, chicken, and bubble tea to the house."

She put her phone away.

"That way Yiyeon won't be too mad about being ditched last minute."

Seonghwa laughed as he nodded.

"Very true and Hongjoong can't cook either."

"Yes, totally true."

The couple shared a laugh as they admired the scenery around them.

"Merry Christmas." Yiseul wished her boyfriend as Seonghwa glanced down at his girlfriend and she could see his eyes smiling brightly.

"Merry Christmas, to you, too."

The pair nuzzled against one another as Yiseul's eyes lit up.

"First, let's get some ice cream."

"But it's cold out."

"Don't care. It's honestly tastes the best when it's cold out."

"Now c'mon. Let's get some ice cream before going home."

"Okay, okay."

They continued down the stream before locating the nearest ice cream shop, and afterwards headed home to enjoy their Christmas meal with the other couple.

#staytheb #ateez scenarios #park seonghwa #kim hongjoong

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jeongwife · 2 years

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jeonghans reaction to you sliding off your panties to give to him while being out with all your friends… jeonghan brainrot 😩😩

- 💃🏽

AHHHHHHHH

the entire night you were basically daring him to make a move. from the moment you had stepped out into the living room in a dress that really accentuated your curves and asked him to zip it up, his hands wandering across the expanse of bare skin, he would be in a daze from your whole outfit. literally his only thoughts are to rail you right then and there, but you’d insist on going out for drinks with your friends, inviting him to tag along. the entire night you’d be teasing him — running your hand up his inner thigh as you talked to your friend, stopping your hand on his growing bulge to palm him achingly slow over his jeans. and when you pull your hand away, his eyes are already dark with lust and he’s ready to call it a day and take you home so that he can rail you into your mattress. but you pull him with you to the dance floor of the club to dance with your friends. he’d grab your waist and pull you against his front, grinding his bulge into your ass so that you remember how needy he is for you. which, of course, makes you more wet for him. you’d drag him to a secluded corner of the bar, and hand him your panties of which are covered in your slick and leave him with them as you went off to talk to your friends. at first he’d be shocked that you’d be so daring right now, when you’re out with your friends but he’d quickly snap out of it, his cock twitching at the thought of how needy you are for him. and he’d make up some lame excuse to get the two of you home so that he can fuck you hard for teasing him so much <3

— admin ryu (CRYING SCREAMING THROWING UP)

#today is just… jihan brainrot #jeonghan smut #yoon jeonghan smut #svt jeonghan smut #seventeen jeonghan smut #svt smut #seventeen smut #jeonghan scenarios #yoon jeonghan scenarios #seventeen scenarios #svt scenarios #jeonghan reactions #yoon jeonghan reactions #seventeen reactions #svt reactions #answered!#🍜 answers!#💃🏽 anon

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evienyx · 3 years

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DSMP Citizens POV 4: The Rebellious Teenager

DSMPsona created by anon

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Hel had lived on the Dream SMP server for longer than they cared to remember. Their parents had moved them and their siblings to the server rather early on, before there was anything more than the main faction. It was peaceful, for a good while, and Hel did their studies, made friends, and lived a calm life.

Then, though, a man by the name of Wilbur Soot, with the help of his right-hand man, TommyInnit, started a revolution, fighting for independence from the rest of the server, and things seemed to almost immediately fall into chaos.

Hel, the oldest of their siblings and right around the same age as TommyInnit himself, did what their parents told them to do: Stay out of trouble. Dream, the Admin of the server, was decidedly not happy with L’Manburg’s defiance, and each side rallied their forces to prepare for a war.

“Hel,” their mother said as they stared out the window at respawned troops running back toward the battlefield, smoke billowing into the sky, “Stay out of it. Don’t get caught in the crossfire because you’re curious. You’ll just end up making enemies, and they’ll come after your siblings just to get back at you, I promise you they will.”

A hand rested on their shoulder. They turned their head to meet their mother’s firm gaze. “Stay out of it.”

And so Hel stayed out of it.

Their friends made bets on which side would win and how.

“I’ll say Dream will win by killing all of them for… three diamonds.”

“Ha, c’mon, that’s lame! I’ll say Dream wins by killing them all and imprisoning them when they respawn for, uh, let’s say five diamonds.”

“I bet Dream kills them all until all their lives are gone for, uh, three diamonds.”

Hel was the only one who bet that L’Manburg would end up winning. They took home most of the prize pool, with one of their friends getting a small cut for correctly guessing that Dream would have a traitor working for him within L’Manburg.

“Who was the traitor?” One of their friends asked them, as Hel was the one who had been the most interested in the members of the Revolution.

Hel shrugged. That information had been kept rather underwraps.

“Oh, well. Anyway, what do you think about King Eret being in charge, now?”

“A puppet monarch if ever I’ve seen one.”

“Yeah, but a pretty puppet monarch.”

“Point taken.”

After L’Manburg gained independence, Hel came home from school one day to boxes lining the front room of the house.

“What’s going on?”

“Mom and Dad decided we’re moving to L’Manburg,” their younger sister said, passing by with her arms full of books that she dropped into a nearby box. “Now that the war is over, they decided that they like President Soot’s policies more, I guess.”

Hel raised an eyebrow but grabbed a box and moved upstairs to begin packing away their own things.

“Why didn’t you fight for L’Manburg?” Their new neighbor, someone who had, asked them about a week after they’d moved in.

“Wanted to stay out of trouble,” Hel replied simply. The neighbor shrugged, passed over a welcome gift of flowers from the Prime Path Flower Shop, and left. Hel shifted the bundle of daffodils in their hands before moving to put them into a vase.

A bit of time passed, and the L’Manburg elections were announced. Hel’s parents and siblings all stayed rather distant from politics.

“No need to waste time paying attention to something that doesn’t matter anyway,” their father said as he held the ladder so their mother could paint the new wood on a corner of their house that had gotten blown apart during a recent conflict between VP Tommy and Dream.

“At least this doesn’t cost us anything to redo,” their mother said each time, as President Soot allocated funds to anyone who needed to rebuild because of a conflict that they weren’t involved in.

“Still need to do the labor,” Hel responded every time, often on their hands and knees to assist their parents.

Their mother would hum vaguely, then, and continue working.

Hel could understand their parents not wanting to pay attention while it was just POG2020 in the running, but when SWAG2020 announced their candidacy, their family still didn’t care. There were stakes now, things that could change in the event that the administration changed, but still their parents didn’t even bother listening to what each candidate promised.

“There are how many parties, now?” Their mother asked one evening when Hel mentioned the debates.

“Four. POG2020, SWAG2020, SCHLATT2020, and COCONUT2020,” Hel replied, despite the fact that they had just talked about this.

Their mother furrowed her eyebrows. “Which one is led by Secretary Underscore, again?”

“None of them.”

As the elections approached, Hel found themselves getting more and more nervous. There were people, ones who had moved into L’Manburg and the server itself long after the Revolution and so had never witnessed Wilbur Soot’s leadership in action, who were passionately supporting SWAG2020.

“A change in leadership is needed,” one of their friends, someone who had moved from a larger survival server with their family about a week-and-a-half after the L’Manburg Revolution ended. “President Soot and VP Tommy have been in charge this whole time! A new perspective is necessary for the country to develop.”

When the election results were announced, Hel wondered if this was what their friend had meant by ‘a new perspective.’

Their parents hadn’t come to hear the results, nor to witness the inauguration that would immediately follow, but Hel was there in the stands, watching the members of the four campaigns standing on the stage above.

President Soot announced the victory of SCHLATT2020 thanks to the coalition government, and he sat with VP Tommy in reserved seats just a few rows ahead of Hel as Schlatt took the microphone for himself.

Then, before Hel could even blink, the leaders of the previous administration were being chased out of the event, and then ex-President Soot fell over, an arrow in his back and screams for VP Tommy on his lips/, and then his body was gone, returned to the server for the second time, with only one more chance before it would stay there for good.

Hel heard whispers of an internal rebellion, led by Niki Nihachu, who were in support of the Pogtopia rebellion that was sprouting up under direction of Wilbur Soot and TommyInnit, and immediately went to the bakery.

“Hello,” Niki Nihachu said, looking rather exhausted as she grabbed a cupcake for another customer and began to bag it. “How can I help you today?”

Hel wet their lips, remembering what one of their friends told them to say. “Feel free to call me crazy, but I was actually wondering if you had anything made with cave crawlers?”

The customer in front of them gave them an odd look as they paid for their cupcake.

“I’ll see if I can find something,” Nihachu said, cracking a smile. “Could you wait for a few minutes?”

Hel nodded and the other customer hurried out of the shop a moment later. Nihachu helped two more people who entered the bakery before she moved into the back room, beckoning at them to follow.

“Niki, nice to meet you,” she said, holding out a hand. Hel took her hand in theirs and shook it firmly.

“I’m Hel, it’s nice to meet you, too,” they replied. “I’ve been trying to get my parents to move to Pogtopia to support the rebellion, but they don’t want to, so I’m here to help however I can.”

Niki smiled. “I’m glad to hear it.”

They snuck around with their friends involved in Niki’s internal rebellion, listening to what the baker told them to do, silently tipping her extra money to compensate for her increased taxes, and, one night, as they were sneaking back into their house in Manburg after helping vandalize the White House, the lights flicked on as they moved to go up the stairs.

Hel winced. They took in a deep breath and turned around to see their parents standing there, arms crossed, their oldest younger sibling standing next to them.

“Hey, guys,” Hel said, forcing a smile. “I was just grabbing some water…”

Their mother glared, and they felt their heart sink in their chest.

“I wasn’t doing anything dangerous!” Hel exclaimed five minutes later, sat on the couch with their parents looming over them. Their siblings weren’t being very discreet where they stood on the stairs, peering around the corner.

“You’re part of a rebellion!” Their father replied. “That, by definition, is dangerous!”

“Nothing’s gonna happen to me!” Hel shot back. “I’m in my final year of school, I’m basically an adult!”

“But you’re not, Hel, you’re not!”

"Well someone has to be!" Hel growled out. "Schlatt is ruining this country!"

"You don't need to be worrying about that," their mother said. "You work on your studies, and play with your friends, and stop it with all this rebellion talk."

"I'm not going to go live in Hypixel like you and Dad did!" Hel said. "I don't want to go to a 'big' server to 'find myself!' I'm going to stay here and I am going to fight for what I care about!"

"What, you're just going to leave? Go join the rebellion. Leave you family behind?" Their mother asked, her nostrils flaring and hair wild.

Hel grit their teeth. "Watch me."

Their parents calling their name behind them, younger siblings frozen around the corner, Hel shouldered their bag again and stalked out the door, slamming it closed as they went. Their face hot and eyes stinging, Hel went to the spot on the Manburg border that they had learned was never surveilled, glanced around, and then slipped into the forest.

A few hours later, they ran into a Pogtopia scouting group, who attacked them until they managed to say the newest code that they had been given for the rebellion. One member of the group split off to lead them back through the forest farther.

"Pogtopia isn't the most... luxurious, I guess," the scout said, "But it's not forever." They turned and faced a dirty wall of rock. The scout knocked on the rock in a rather quick pattern, and a moment later, the wall fell away to reveal the tired face of a guard. The scout nodded to the guard, who returned the greeting, and Hel followed them inside, the rock wall closing behind them. As the scout led them down the stairs, they looked back at Hel and said, "I hope you like potatoes."

Before Hel could ask what they were talking about, they went around the final turn in the staircase and emerged in an enormous ravine. Lanterns hung from the ceiling, bridges strung across to allow access to rooms dug into the walls. The bottom of the ravine was expanded out, and people moved past one another with a surprising amount of purpose.

"Welcome to Pogtopia," the scout said, patting Hel on the shoulder. They realized that they had been staring. The scout cracked a smile. "C'mon. Let's get you sorted."

Hel was given a bunk a few hours after, a chest for themself, and was officially a member of Pogtopia. As they talked with friends that they hadn't seen since the election, they pretended that their heart didn't feel a bit empty.

For the months following, Hel assisted where they could. They helped establish firmer contact with Nihachu and the internal rebellion. They gave any information they had, and contacted trustworthy friends of theirs to get insider information. They attended training to learn how to wield a weapon, and they was taught how to disguise themselves, and quiet their footsteps, and, for some reason, how to prepare potatoes.

"Sometimes we need extra hands," the kitchen head who had asked President Soot to require the class told Hel. "Technoblade grows a lot of potatoes."

Hel found that that was true very quickly when, a week later, they were called out of training early to help out at the kitchens and watched as a piglin hybrid lugged in barrels and barrels of potatoes.

"This enough?" The hybrid asked gruffly once he'd brought in the sixth and final barrel.

The Head Chef nodded, a gentle smile on her face. "Yes, this will be good for the week, thank you, Technoblade."

Technoblade gave her a nod in return before turning and leaving the room without another word.

"We prepare everything other than dinner in advance," the Head Chef told Hel after the hybrid was gone. "And sometimes he shows up with more than this. Thankfully we had enough forewarning to get some help here before he showed up."

Other than the cold, damp nature of the ravine, and the general serious, somber feeling that clouded everything, Pogtopia wasn't the worst place to live. Hel enjoyed themself more than they had living with their parents, and they felt like they had a purpose, much more than when all they did was study.

"Tomorrow, November 16th, we shall fight the combined forces of Manburg and the Greater SMP to determine the fate of our country," President Soot said. Everyone had seen the deterioration of their leader, there was no way to miss it, and the mania in his eyes was present even now, but he was smiling, and he sounded hopeful, so the people couldn't help but feel the same. "Those of you who wish to fight have already indicated so, and everyone else has been given their jobs."

Niki Nihachu, who had fully joined Pogtopia after the Manburg Festival, stepped forward. "Remember, you might be fighting against friends. You might be fighting against family. The Manburg and Greater SMP forces will be shooting to kill. You must be prepared to do the same."

"We will not ask you to sacrifice your morals," President Soot continued, "But if you do not think that you would be able to kill if you're backed into a corner, then feel free to pull yourself from the forces. Make sure you do it by the end of the night."

Soot's fingers tapped aggressively against his leg, and he kept glancing up to the roof of the ravine. Then, without another word, he was gone, Niki trailing behind him.

The people of Pogtopia who had been present and not just listening over the loudspeakers dispersed to go prepare for the battle the next day. As they did, there was a crackle above them again and, just as it had twice every day for weeks, VP Tommy's voice came through the speakers.

"Hello, Pogtopia!" He exclaimed, static filling his words thanks to his volume. Someone hissed at him, and he quieted. "Er, sorry. This is Big Man TommyInnit, just reminding you again not to touch any of the buttons on the walls if you don't want everyone to die! Thanks!" There was another crackle, and the voice disappeared.

Hel exchanged glances with the person next to them and shifted a bit more away from the wall before continuing on.

The battle the following day went by quickly. Their family was nowhere to be seen, and Hel had been put on ranged combat, anyway. They bowed down anyone not on their side, and hoped that none of the people they were killing were on their last life.

When all was said and done, Hel stood watching the newly-inaugurated President Tubbo speak of rebuilding their country, and Hel felt pride swell up in their chest feeling that, now that they've fought for L'Manburg, they could truly call it theirs.

Then, there was a hissing below them. People in the crowd around them screamed. Hel spun around, watching in confusion as the people ran. The ground shook, then everything froze for a moment, and then they were gone.

Hel shot up in their bunk in Pogtopia. Their hands shook, their face was hot, tears falling from their eyes. Someone grabbed at them, and they let out a cry, whacking the hand away.

"Hey, Hel, calm down, calm down."

They blinked and focused in on the Head Chef, standing in front of them with a gentle smile.

"What happened?" She asked.

Hel's mouth was dry. They wet their lips.

"We... We won," Hel said.

The Head Chef gasped and relayed the information to someone at the door, who called it out to the rest of the occupants of the ravine. The remaining members of Pogtopia could be heard cheering.

"Wait, if we won..." The Head Chef looked down at them. "How did you die?"

Hel, as well as the other Pogtopia members who were respawning from the explosion and following fight, explained what had happened. Apparently, Hel got off lucky, as Technoblade had then spawned Withers. That was when they all noticed the notification that had shot through their communicators, one that informed the whole server of Wilbur Soot's death.

"That was his last life," the Head Chef said, and she sounded like she wasn't particularly surprised. Her arms, at some point, had ended up embracing Hel.

"So, we won, but our country is gone, and whatever is left is being led by a teenager?" Someone asked.

Hel, sixteen-years-old and freshly dead themself, buried their face in their hands and pretended that the Head Chef's arms, holding them close, were their parents' instead.

#dsmp #dream smp #dsmp citizen pov #dsmp citizens memes #tw death #niki nihachu #wilbur soot #tommyinnit #tubbo #mcyt #technoblade #dsmpsona #the rebellious teenager #not just rebellious in terms of joining rebellions #but also against their family #its like #a double meaning #whoa thats so crazy #anyway yes i am still accepting dsmpsona submissions i will lyk if i ever change this

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the-vault-apprentice · 3 years

Note

*peeps in* If I can ask, why did you decide to be a vault apprentice? And what drew you to the Vault of Knowledge?

Well..... I like the Vault.

((The admin of this blog has ADHD, anxiety/depression issues, and is on the autism spectrum. I spent a good deal of my childhood indoors. Reading, mostly. I've always felt at home in a library, and I've always loved the stars. The Vault of Knowledge is like a library had a baby with the night sky, and I LOVE it. Plus, my first season was Little Prince, so....))

Isle is too empty, Prairie is too bright, I don't like rain, the Valley is too fast, Wasteland is too sad, and Eden is.... Out of the question. But the Vault?

It's so... Peaceful. It's quiet, but not an empty quiet. It's open, but not NOTHING. There is nothing that can hurt you here. There are four walls around you and you are safe, but not TRAPPED or cramped, either. The ghost mantas and the purple flowers and the strange small waterfalls give me a strong feeling of peace and comfort.

Destruction behind me, and death ahead, but here is a dream. A moment of calm and quiet and peace and rest.

As far as being a vault APPRENTICE, well. The bottom floors clearly saw SOME damage in the disaster. There's always sand being tracked in from the Wasteland, memory cubes are knocked over, it's a mess! Besides that, SOMEONE has to light the candles and pet the ghost mantas and keep the spirits here company! They're so spread out, and I do not want them to think they have been forgotten!

.....

And I felt very strongly that Lamed needed help. I can't explain it. I just FEEL it. Here.... Feels RIGHT

#sky: children of the light #that sky game #koulakani #vault of knowledge #wish upon a star #the faceless ones

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kuroopaisen · 4 years

Note

Hi! Can i req kuroo falling in love with kenmas best friend?

this got super self-indulgent and super long (it’s about 3k), but,,, i hope you enjoy it!! i really loved writing it

- admin rowan

they’d done it. they’d done the one thing most people thought was nigh impossible.

they’d become friends with kozume kenma.

kuroo stared at his phone, one eyebrow raised. sure enough, the message was there.

KENMA, 3:42 PM: i’m at the coffee shop. i’m meeting a friend for lunch

kenma. meeting a friend? for lunch? on campus?

oh, he had to find out more.

“so you’re meeting them for lunch, huh?” kuroo propped his chin up on his hand, grinning at kenma from across the table. the uni cafes tended to thin out in the later afternoon, which had made it the ideal time. this new friend of his might not have been able to encourage kenma to hang out with them if they’d arranged it for earlier in the day.

“uh huh,” kenma murmured, eyes glued to his phone.

“where’d you meet this friend of yours, then?” kuroo asked. all sorts of questions were bubbling in his mind. he didn’t know if he had enough time to ask them.

“one of my electives,” kenma said. “we got paired up for an assignment. i thought it was going to be painful, but it wasn’t.”

those words were pure poetry to kuroo. this was the first time he’d heard kenma even say something like that.

truth be told, kuroo had been terrified that kenma would go his entire uni career without making a single friend. sure, it was only his first year, but that first semester hadn’t shown much promise. the uni volleyball team hadn’t quite… bonded yet either. not in the same way nekoma had. but that wasn’t a pain kuroo wanted to linger on in that moment.

“so,” he hummed, “what are they like?”

he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t intrigued. kenma hadn’t made an active effort to be friends with anyone since middle school – the fact that he was going to lunch with them, of his own volition, felt like something kuroo’d have to note down in the history books.

“they’re cool, i guess,” kenma shrugged.

kuroo pouted. he’d been hoping for a little more than that, but…

“hi!” a voice rang out behind him. both he and kenma turned to look.

there they stood, cheeks blindingly red and hands on their knees.

“sorry i’m late,” they waved a hand at kenma, the other held to their chest. “i got lost, and this campus is far too large, and then someone asked me where the health center was, and–”

“it’s fine,” kenma said, his voice still soft. they stopped their tirade, trying to stand up straighter. “you should get some water.”

“right!” they nodded. a flash, and they were gone, lost inside the coffee shop.

kuroo bit back a smile. this was kenma’s new friend? he hadn’t expected someone so… flustered.

“what?” kenma asked, eyes turned to kuroo.

“nothing.”

kenma narrowed his eyes ever so slightly. “don’t be lame.”

kuroo gaped at him, one hand over his chest in mock offence. “whatever do you mean?”

“you know exactly what i mean.”

“i can’t believe they’re charging five dollars for a bottle of water,” they grumbled, appearing out of nowhere once again. both the boys looked up at them, face still flushed.

“there are places to get free water,” kenma said.

their expression dropped, but only for a moment. they shrugged. “too late, i suppose.”

their eyes drifted over kuroo. he could’ve sworn their cheeks turned just turned a tad redder. “sorry, i didn’t really introduce myself, did i?”

“kuroo,” he nodded, looking them up and down.

“oh, right,” they smiled. “i’ve heard a bit about you.”

a shit-eating grin crossed kuroo’s face as he turned to look at kenma.

“none of it was good.”

they bit the inside of their cheek, unsure about whether or not it’d be okay to laugh.

kuroo just scoffed, raising an eyebrow at kenma. “after all i’ve done for you? you wound me.”

“you’ll recover.”

kuroo looked between the two of them, that same sly smile returning to his face. “well, i’ll leave you to it then,” he said, standing up to full height. their eyebrows raised ever so slightly – wow, he was tall. “you kids better not have too much fun, you hear me?”

they didn’t quite know how they felt about him referring to them as a ‘kid’, but they simply smiled at him.

“it was nice to meet you!” they said, before immediately chastising themselves for their peppiness. god, you must seem so weird, they thought.

kuroo grinned. “and you.”

and then, he was gone. they turned to look at kenma, tilting their head at him. “he’s that childhood friend of yours, right?”

kenma nodded.

“huh,” they hummed, sitting themselves down in kuroo’s old seat.

kenma didn’t talk about the people in his life with much embellishment, and he didn’t like being pushed to talk about them. but, this new friend of his had heard quite a few stories about kuroo; scant details that they’d managed to string together to form a loose idea of a person. they’d gotten the impression that he was a kind, grounding force, one that’d been there for most of kenma’s life.

he wasn’t what they’d expected.

——–

to say the friendship between them and kuroo felt natural is an understatement. hell, the boy decided he was fond of them that day they met – they’d got kenma’s approval? kozume kenma, known recluse, engaged with them in meaningful ways? nothing had quite warmed the cockles of his heart like that in a while.

and better yet, they and kenma had gotten close. they hung out a lot – or rather, they spent a lot of time at the apartment he and kuroo shared. and kuroo, nosey as he was, often crashed their time together. not that they or kenma minded; the atmosphere just always felt… right.

and sooner rather than later, they started to go over explicitly with the intention of hanging out with both of them. as much as kenma loved the both of them, he could only deal with company for so long; but neither they nor kuroo were quite done with the conversation. they’d lost many a good night’s sleep to a long, drawn-out chat with kuroo. not that they minded. not with him.

and that night looked like just another one of those, at first glance.

they were both sat on the couch, their legs absentmindedly strewn over his. they couldn’t help it, really; he was just so long, and he’d decided he wanted to take up as much space as possible. mainly to piss them off.

and, one of them was rambling on about something vaguely esoteric. this time, they’d dominated the conversation. they hadn’t planned to; it’s just that they were thinking about one of their classes that week, and it had all come flooding back. and kuroo, bless his soul, was humouring them. like he always did.

“what, so there were eight distinct winds?” kuroo asked, tilting his head at them.

“yeah,” they nodded. “each was it’s own, like… deity? and winds blowing from different directions would do different things to you.”

kuroo raised an eyebrow.

“this guy, vitruvius was saying that… well, wind would make you sick, right?”

“uh huh.”

“hot wind specifically would make you really sick.”

kuroo snorted. “why? isn’t it the other way around?”

“well…” they bit their lip, trying to simplify the needlessly convoluted concept in a matter of seconds. “the romans thought the body was made up of the four elements, right? but they thought they were heat, moisture, earth and air. and humans were supposed to have all four in balance, right? unlike fish which had like… no moisture, so they could live in water pretty easily.” they paused. “is this too much?”

kuroo shook his head. “nah. you look pretty into it.”

they didn’t quite know what he meant by that, but he was smiling. they ignored that weird little buzzing in their stomach and moved on.

“so anyway, getting too hot was supposed to make you weak and sick.” they didn’t quite know why they were going on about all this. it hadn’t even been a big component of their class that week; it was just a tidbit they’d found interesting. but, as always, they just kept talking. and talking. and talking. that was always the way, with kuroo. they wanted to tell him about everything.

and half the time, it seemed to be the same thing for him. they’d heard a lot of scientific jargon they didn’t quite understand, no matter how well he explained them to them.

“oh,” they held up a finger, their favourite fact of the week springing to mind, “they also thought that hot air made everyone horny.”

there it was. that ugly cackle they’d grown so fond of. “what, really?”

they nodded. “and this was in the mediterranean, so… they would’ve lived through some pretty hot summers. with no air con.”

“gross.” kuroo scrunched his nose up. they tried to ignore how cute that was. “sounds like a terrible time be horny, to be honest. you can’t be having a good time.” he looked up at the ceiling and away from you. “i’d make sure to have a fan around, at the very least.”

“did you really just say the equivalent to ‘sorry ancient romans, but i’m different’?”

“and if i did?” kuroo shot them one of his devilish grins.

they had no retort to that. if they did try and throw a quip back at him, the conversation might get into a territory they weren’t quite ready to confront.

“how’s your assessment going?” they asked. sure, it was an abrupt change of subject, but it was a safe one.

kuroo groaned, his head falling even further back over the arm of the sofa. “don’t remind me.”

“sorry,” they grinned.

he sat back up with a grunt, his dark eyes narrowed. “i’ve been putting if off. volleyball practice has been my excuse, but…”

“did you get your pracs done, at least?”

“oh, yeah,” he waved a hand at them. “i got those done ages ago. it’s just writing the damn thing up.” he sighed, running a hand through his hair. he froze for a second, turning to look directly at them again. “i saw that care package, by the way.” kuroo’s eyes were much softer than usual. fond, even.

right, the care package. it was just a little something they’d put together for kenma; he had a particularly rough few weeks ahead, with awkwardly scheduled exams and assignments. he hadn’t seemed to be all that stressed about it, but they’d wanted to do something. he always got so… anxious after procrastinating for so long and even more neglectful when it came to his health.

“oh, that,” they waved a hand at kuroo, suddenly very self-conscious of how their legs were entangled. “i didn’t really expect him to use it, but…” they tilted their head to the side. “i hoped it’d remind him to take care of himself a little.”

a gentle smile crossed kuroo’s face as he gazed at them. suddenly, they didn’t know where to look.

“thank you for looking out for him.”

the words left kuroo’s mouth before he’d really thought about them. but he meant it. he really did.

they shook their head. “i haven’t really done anything worth thanking.”

“you know he hasn’t actively made a friend since middle school?” kuroo said, turning to look at them.

they turned to him with wide eyes.

“there were the guys on the team, of course, but…” he sighed. “i think that was more propinquity than anything else. can’t see him ending up friends with them otherwise.” he ran one hand through his hair. “well, there is that kid hinata, but other than that…”

“sounds like he’s made a few friends since middle school,” they smiled.

kuroo chuckled. “well…” he bit the inside of his cheek. should he be having this conversation? was it wise?

fuck it.

“i just… i get worried about him,” he said, the words slurring together ever so slightly.

“because he’s so reclusive?”

kuroo nodded. “i just… i want him to be okay, and i don’t want him to end up isolating himself, but…”

he couldn’t grasp the words. fuck, he hadn’t even drunk anything tonight.

“he tends to hide himself away?”

“exactly,” kuroo nodded. “i’m surprised he decided to come to uni, honestly. even if he wasn’t really academic at school or anything like that…” he sighed. “he still does really well, despite leaving everything to the last minute, but…”

“it’s not healthy,” they said.

“yeah,” kuroo smiled, running a hand through his hair. “you get it. you always do.” he was looking at them again.

he really was handsome. tall, broad, with a certain devil-may-care vibe that made it all look so effortless. it was a weird thing to think, but they enjoyed looking at him. not quite as much as they enjoyed spending time with him, though.

oh. shit.

it was like he was coming into clarity for the first time. this guy, who loved kenma so much, who looked after him and treated him with the respect he deserved. the same guy who just seemed to get them, to understand them so well even when their words were clumsy – and who genuinely listened whenever they rambled about whatever was on their mind. this guy who was such a nerd, and yet also some of the best company they’d had in a long while.

they knew he was attractive the day they’d first met – hell, all they had to do was look at him to work that one out – but that’d just been physical. they’d never expected to actually catch feelings for him.

and all that weird buzzing in their stomach made sense. all the nervousness, all the tension.

shit. shit, shit, shit.

“what’s wrong?” kuroo asked, raising an eyebrow at them.

“hm?” they blinked.

“you’re staring.”

“oh,” they swallowed, shamefully aware of the blush creeping across their cheeks. “nothing’s wrong, i was just… thinking.”

“about?”

“kenma,” they lied.

“right,” he cleared his throat, breaking eye contact.

they sighed, bringing their knees up to their chest. no point in denying it to themselves anymore – they had feelings for a certain kuroo tetsurou.

“i’m tired,” they said, before really thinking about it. it wasn’t a total lie – it’d be a long week, after all – but they knew they’d said it more as an excuse to get away from him. part of them felt bad about it.

but the other part of them knew that if they stayed here much longer, they might say something they’d regret.

–—

kuroo shut his bedroom door with just a tad too much force.

fuck. fuck.

this entire time, he’d been teasing kenma about having a thing for them, but…

fuck.

he was a fucking idiot.

of course he had feelings for them. there was no other way to explain any of it; how he looked forward to their visits just a bit too much, how making them laugh made his stomach feel a little funny, how they were the first person he wanted to talk to about the things that’d happened in his life…

and he’d had feelings for them for quite a while now.

he’d wrote it all off for some stupid reason. something about being happy about getting along so well with kenma’s close friend. or simply the joy of being understood so well.

but seeing them look at him like that, with such tenderness in their eyes…

fuck, he’d thought about kissing them.

and he couldn’t get that thought out of his head.

was that out of line? was he betraying their friendship somehow, by thinking about them like this?

he cared about them. a lot. regardless of these… romantic feelings. but would that get muddied?

and what about kenma? what would happen if things didn’t quite work out?

no, he was thinking too far ahead. he didn’t even know if they were interested in him. were they? a warm, fuzzy swelling burst in his chest at the thought. huh. he really was whipped, wasn’t he?

kuroo groaned, rubbing his eyes. it’d been a while since he’d worked himself up over something like this. he was getting carried away.

this wasn’t going to go away overnight. nor would it be easy to ignore. no, it’d been spreading its roots for a long while now.

he had faith that he’d be able to act normally around them, at the very least. but maybe it was wise to set some distance between the two of them, just for a while.

–—

“you should just ask them out, you know.”

kuroo’s phone tumbled out of his hand. “what?”

kenma looked at him out the corner of his eye. “you know what i’m talking about.”

oh. kuroo tried to swallow the dryness in his throat. had he been that obvious?

“you’re like a puppy. it’s weird.”

kuroo stared at kenma for a long while. what on earth was he supposed to say to that?

“i don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“they can tell you’ve been ignoring them, you know,” kenma said quietly. “they’re getting sad about it.”

an icy shock jolted through kuroo’s chest. shit, so they had noticed. he’d hoped that the chaos of the past few weeks would give him a good enough excuse to draw back without being too obvious about it.

of course they’d notice. why was he being so stupid about all this?

“i…” nope, nothing was coming.

“if you’re worried about me, you shouldn’t be,” kenma continued, monotone as ever. “if you date and break up i’ll just hang out with them at their place.”

“wow,” kuroo scoffed. “preparing for the end of the relationship before it’s even begun? you wound me, kenma.”

“so it’s going to happen then?” kenma said, not missing a beat.

kuroo narrowed his eyes at him. “do you want it to happen?”

kenma shrugged. “it’s got nothing to do with me. and maybe it’ll stop you being so lame.”

that was the second time that afternoon that kenma had struck him dumb.

kuroo sighed, running a hand through his hair. he was going to have to say something, wasn’t he? otherwise he was going to regret it.

#haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #kuroo tetsurou #kuroo x reader #admin rowan #do i want to do a part two to this? we'll see #i also kind of feel like it's a bit disjointed so maybe i'll rework this at a later date

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brittledame · 4 years

Text

Pairing: Shirabu Kenjirou/Reader

Warnings: Explicit, hate-sex, swearing, name calling, light bondage, edging, overstimulation, semi-public sex

Word Count: 6.6K

Summary: Contrary to what you both believed, the tryst in the study room only served to intensify the tense air between you two. Not wanting to acknowledge how he’s been on your mind since, you shut him out completely. Unknowing to you, Shirabu is plagued with the same thoughts. Tension boils over once again as you find yourself left alone with him in the gym.

Series: Part 2 of 3 (Part 1 & Part 3)

To say that the last few weeks since handing in the assignment have been tense was an understatement. Ever since the incident in the study room, your head has been in utter disarray.

There were many things on the burning pile of your mind that added to your mounting vexation. The first one being that you gave into him, and no matter how pleasurable that was, it was a major blow to your pride. Since that library session, Shirabu acted as if nothing out of the ordinary happened. Hell, if you weren’t for the bruises painted on your hips, you might’ve convinced yourself it was a very vivid sex dream about your rival.

Unlike Shirabu’s heated anger, yours was more of the frosty kind. Cold shoulders punctuated with icy looks. The two of you were opposites in every sense of the term and yet he haunted you like an embarrassing childhood memory that refuses to let you sleep.

You let your hand slip out from where it was supporting your cheek and let your head ‘thunk’ against the table. Concerned, Natsuki pauses from her bento and gives you an assessing look.

“Alright, you’ve been acting weird for a while now. Are you alright?” Natsuki narrow her eyes at you, a silent warning that you wouldn't get away with lying.

Asides from her expression, you could hear concern ring loud and clear in her voice. Natsuki was a dear friend but she was also as stubborn as a bull if she wanted something, just like you. Now that you think of it, maybe that was why you two got along so well.

Knowing that you weren’t going to be able to evade the question, you give her a plausible excuse.

“University entrance exams are getting closer and I feel like I’m hitting a wall when I try to study.”

It was partially true. Albeit the reason you were hitting a wall was mostly because you can’t go more than an hour sitting there without your thoughts drifting to Shirabu’s hands on your hips, thrusting inside of you with vitriolic comments on the tip of his tongue. But Natsuki didn’t need to know all of that.

Accepting the lame excuse, Natsuki nods her head in empathy.

“I feel you there,” she frowns, “with my council duties on top of everything, I feel like I’m doing work but getting nowhere with it. They have me running around every afternoon trying to get forms signed. By the time I’m done I don’t want to study.”

You quietly hum at her tribulations. Annoyed at your uncharacteristic brooding demeanour recently, Natsuki sharply prods your cheek with her chopstick. You bat her hand away and turn to weakly glare up at her.

In your periphery, a flash of copper-toned hair catches your attention. Peering at the boy that’s been distracting you from the corner of your eyes, you could see him sitting like a statue among the lively chatter of his table. For some reason, the mere sight of his blank face and stupidly straight fringe elicited anger inside of you.

If it wasn’t clear before, that reaction to his existence was enough to rule out the possibility of you falling for him. This fills you with relief. You had suspected the possibility when you caught yourself thinking about him on a daily basis, but the thought terrified you.

“Hey, are you even listening to me?” Natsuki pouts at you, hand poised to jab you in the cheek with her chopstick again.

“Yes.”

“Is that a yes to delivering the form or for listening?”

“Both,” you absent-mindedly answer, eyeing off your unfinished bento, knowing you weren't in the mood to finish it.

“Thanks for doing this favour for me.” Natsuki sounded genuinely glad as she riffles through her binder she refuses to leave in her desk.

With a small ‘aha’, she pulls out a sheath of paper and holds it out to you. Sitting up from your slouched position, you gingerly take the paperwork. You wonder what you might’ve signed yourself up for when you see how much writing is crammed onto the first page.

“What is this?” You ask.

“I knew you weren’t listening.” Natsuki says, a knowing glint in her eyes. “I told you that I need to get the volleyball’s club captain to submit their plan for the new people filling the team roles and other admin stuff like that.”

At the casual mention of the volleyball’s captain, dread gripped your heart.

“The volleyball captain?” You parrot back weakly.

“Yeah,” she gives you an odd look, “you know, Shirabu. The guy who you claim to hate. Surely you knew he was captain.”

Oh, you knew all too well that he was the damn captain. Being the overachieving bastard that he was, as if acing high school and aiming for medical school was enough, the dick had to add in being captain to a national-placing sports team as well.

Petulantly looking away to not meet Natsuki’s unimpressed look, your eyes incidentally met golden ones. The eye contact probably lasted all of a millisecond, but it was the most you two shared over the past few weeks. With you avoiding looking at Shirabu at every possible opportunity and Shirabu himself making no attempt to address the elephant in the room, you both let the elephant waste away and dye under the lack of attention.

Breaking the eye contact, you turn your attention back to the brunette in front of you. “Why am I doing this for you?”

“Because you’re a good friend?” She bats her eyelashes at you.

You give her a flat look, not believing her for a second.

“Come on,” she whines, “you know those volleyball guys scare me. They’re way too tall.”

“They shouldn’t. They’re a bunch a meat-heads.” You don’t mention the fact that their captain is below the national height average, which you find quite hilarious for a sport that’s all about height and strength.

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Whatever, I’ve got the papers now, so it’s already settled. Don’t say that I’m not a good friend.”

Natsuki gives you a wide smile that makes you pause.

“Maybe while you’re at it, you can sort out whatever happened between the two of you since working on that science project.”

Your skin breaks out in goose bumps at the innocent words paired with a meaningful undertone.

It was then that you swore to never underestimate the power of Natsuki’s perception.

Not wanting to interrupt practice and bring unnecessary attention to yourself, you decided it was best to wait until practice finished. Remembering the time practice should be ending from your previous sessions with Shirabu, you holed yourself up in the dorms during the meantime, trying your hardest to work through some practice exam questions to no avail. Your traitorous thoughts kept drifting to the copper-haired setter roughly handling you.

Phantom touches ghosted along the same places Shirabu had graced upon not that long ago. Unthinkingly, your thighs press together as the memory of him ruthlessly fucking into you plays in your mind for the umpteenth time this week alone.

Frustrated with your horny mind, you slap your cheeks. The sting drives away the faint tendrils of arousal and brings back clarity. God, now was not the time to be getting all hot and bothered over something he probably hasn’t thought twice about. You valued yourself more than to ruminate over something so basal.

Looking at the time, it signals that you should head off if you want to get the forms signed tonight as per Natsuki's explicit orders. Snatching the forms off the corner of your desk, you set off to the gym with a stone sitting heavy in your stomach.

Thankfully, it was warm enough to not wear a jacket. The heat teases the stress from your tense shoulders. The walk was calming, the scent of blooming sakura and freshly cut grass further soothing your frayed nerves.

You weren’t nervous per say, more anxious at finding out how your body may react to being in such close proximity to him again. Since that night, purposeful or not, you both struggled to find an appropriate time to meet up and decided that it was best to do it all online since the majority of it was completed.

The sounds of shoes squeaking over varnished wood along with the low murmur of male voices met your ears as you slide your shoes into a cubby and slipped on indoor shoes. You’ve only been in gym one three times before and that was for the opening ceremonies. The sight of high beam ceilings and sleek modern interior still astounded you.

The boys running around had mops in hand, whilst others climbed to dismantle nets, but most of them were missing. Looking around for a head of copper-hair, you hoped that Shirabu hadn’t left early like most captains would. However, your mission was interrupted as your sight was filled with black hair and glittering dark eyes peering at you.

“Hi, can I help you?”

“Yes. Is Shirabu still here?” You answer, taking note of how tall the boy is. His face doesn’t seem familiar and you’d definitely remember meeting someone with a bowl-cut. He must be in a year below you, you reason.

“Ah,” the boy’s eyes flit over to the right, “he’s over there.”

Following his line of sight, you found Shirabu standing with his arms crossed next to an open door talking to a ginger-haired guy that you’ve definitely seen in your class before.

“Thanks.” You nod to the younger who smiles to you and continues whatever chose he was assigned.

Walking over to the pair, you catch his eye without even trying. Shirabu’s expression changes minutely, a subtle twitch of the mouth that has you contemplating homicide. You were over-reacting, surely. Still, you hoped that maybe he could fake being pleasant for as long as it takes to fill the forms out.

“Sorry to interrupt –“

“No, you’re not.” Shirabu interrupts. Well there goes the fantasy of him being pleasant for one minute. Even his tall friend gives him a look for cutting you off.

“You’re right. I’m not,” You concede. Placing a hand on your hip, you hold the papers out to him.

Shirabu blankly stares at you instead of taking them, which added to your mounting annoyance. Fine. If he wanted to play the petty game, so would you.

“These are forms for the retiring captain of the volleyball club to fill out. Unfortunately it turned out to be you.” You say with a plastic smile. “The team must be really sad to see their esteemed captain leave, huh?”

Shirabu’s jaw clenched at your poorly concealed insults, not even bothering to dress them up like you preferred to do. Expecting him to rise to the bait, you waited for the onslaught of offense he’ll spew in response.

“I’m busy right now. You can wait until I’m done.”

He brushes you off, turning and walking away from you. His friend gives you an apologetic look, knowing how shitty his friend’s personality is.

Your eye twitches with restrained violence as you watched him saunter away. With clenched hands you wait by the storage room’s doorway. You dismiss the few pitying glances from the few people walking past you to put the cleaning equipment away.

You busy yourself with your phone as Shirabu continues to waste your precious time that you could be using to catch up on some much needed studying that he was unknowingly depriving you of recently.

Kenjirou had not expected you to turn up tonight, catching him by surprise. When he noticed you, an inexplicable feeling rushed over him. He tried to keep his face neutral as you drew closer but the moment you opened your mouth he couldn’t help himself.

That temporary high of riling you up and then giving you the cold shoulder was incredible. After the weeks of your frigid treatment and the plain disregard for his existence you subjected him to, it was the least he could repay you with. The worst part of it all was that he couldn’t even ask about your sudden change of attitude, as you would try your hardest to avoid being in a room alone with him.

All he did know was that he weirdly missed the fiery attitude you possessed. It frustrated him to no end that as soon as the assignment was completed, you had done your hardest to ghost him. As much as one could when you shared the same classroom for near seven hours of the day.

Your suddenly frigid attitude didn’t stop you staring, though. Kenjirou had caught you a few times looking in his direction with an indescribable expression. From your distant expression, he couldn’t tell if you either wanted to stab him or re-enact that last study session.

Regardless, the entire affair has him on edge. He thought that fucking you would vent all those conflicting emotions and give him peace. Instead he feels more restless now than ever.

And to his dismay, this did not go unnoticed by Taichi.

“Is there a reason why you’re being more of a prick to her than usual?”

Kenjirou ignored the question in favour for checking out the gym. The first and second years were generally tasked to do clean-up and they did so with vigour, feeling privileged to work in an old war-horse team with a vendetta.

“Man, I never took you to be the ‘boy pulls girl's pigtails because he likes her’ stereotype when getting a girl's attention.” Taichi muses.

Shirabu scowls at Taichi. “Shut up. She annoys the hell out of me and that’s all.”

Taichi grabs him by the arm, eyebrow piqued. “She didn’t even speak two words and you were at her throat.”

“She doesn’t need to say anything to piss me off.”

“Funny that she’s willing to be civil and yet you aren’t.”

Kenjirou chooses not to comment on that.

The pissed off expression on his face has the younger members avoiding him like the plague, choosing to leave for their dorms over loitering in the locker room.

“Are you going to help me lock up or not?”

“Only if you stop looking murderous.”

Taichi’s knee buckles as Kenjirou delivers a swift kick to the back of it.

“Go away, I can do it on my own.”

“Fine,” Taichi says, looking relieved at the early dismissal. Kenjirou didn't doubt for a moment that Taichi planned for it. “Don’t murder the cute girl. I won’t be your alibi.”

“You’re a terrible friend.” Kenjirou hisses under his breath.

Taichi laughs and leaves Kenjirou to his own devices. Remembering that you were waiting on him, he’s surprised to find that you were still there. Leaning against the wall tapping at your phone looking bored, you didn’t notice his eyes on you. You were still wearing the school uniform, with the exception of your tie and first few buttons undone.

There was a casual air about you that he didn’t get to see every day. His eyes linger on your skirt, fingers twitching with the memory of how the fabric felt under them. Without his permission, an image of your panties tucked away in the back of his bedside table flashes to the forefront of his mind.

Unlike the previous times the thought popped into mind, Kenjirou chooses not to fight it away as he turns away from you and goes through the motions of checking the locker room and hallways before locking up.

The lacy scrap of fabric was a memento of sorts, a trophy of him putting you in your place the same way he envisioned in his more… illicit fantasies. Although, they may be cursed. As absurd as the idea is, Kenjirou has no other explanation for the phenomenon that’s been occurring since his ownership of them. He can barely stand looking at the harmless piece of furniture containing them without feeling heat spark up inside of him.

At first, he ruled it to anger or frustration, a common emotion he experiences in your vicinity. It only took a week after the tryst, left alone in his dorm room for the weekend did he indulge the demon in his mind. It wasn’t until he was coming down from his high, your soft panties wrapped around his hand covered in drying cum, did the weight of his actions sink in.

It didn’t stop there, though. No, that’d be too easy for him, and if Kenjirou had learnt anything since you breezed into his life, life was all about being difficult.

He had woken up a few times to ruined sheets from dreams of your sweet moans and pliable body under his hands, all too willing to obey his every demand. It's laughable that he thinks you would ever be like that, but that’s why he supposes their called wet dreams – they’re unrealistic fantasies. The logical part of him chimes in the significance of Kenjirou liking you to the extent of your appearing in those fantasies, but Kenjirou did his best to smother that voice until it died.

The keys in his hand rattle as he shoves them into his pocket. Without even realising it, he managed to complete lock-up. The only soul besides his in the gym belonged to the only person that could piss him off with just a look.

Walking down the hallway, towards where you were waiting, Kenjirou decisively concluded the knot in his stomach was not anticipation, it was from the annoyance at knowing he was forced to be with you in the few precious hours he has to himself.

Your mindless scrolling stops as you check the time, pissed that he’s held you back for this long. You wished you could leave but you promised to give the completed forms to Natsuki in the morning and you didn’t trust Shirabu for as far as you could throw him.

Whilst you didn’t expect him to greet you with open arms and a charming smile, you were fed up with his belligerent attitude. While he’s always been like that, it’s really been grating on your nerves recently. You’ve become acutely aware of Shirabu’s every move. The sight of him alone, at ease talking among peers made you experience something you’ve never felt before.

The closest description to the feeling is butterflies fluttering around your stomach, but the idiom was simultaneously nauseating and horrifying to you.

From dwelling on it for weeks now, you knew that your sudden interest towards him stemmed from lusting over him, as adamant you were to admit. Unfortunately, you enjoyed him taking you from behind without any regard for you. It infuriated you that you got off on his nasty personality.

“Give me the papers.”

The unexpected appearance of Shirabu’s voice startles you, very nearly causing you to drop your phone.

You click your tongue at him and give him an admonishing look for his rudeness. Grabbing the papers tucked under your arm, you hand it over to him.

“Here.”

Without a word of thanks, he takes them and starts reading over them, not wanting to dignify your cold tone. Biting your tongue, you fish out a pen in your pocket. You were sorely tempted to toss it at his head, but you were above acting so childish, unlike Shirabu.

Moving close to him, you stay out of his personal space as you point to sections of the paper with the pen and start reciting everything Natsuki told you. You were nothing but meticulous and as much as you despised her for setting you up, you never half-assed anything.

At the end of your spiel, Kenjirou snatches your pen from your grasp and start filling out the form against the wall. At your indignant shout, he simply rolls his eyes.

It was obvious that Shirabu wanted to be anywhere else but here with you, evident by his silence. Weirdly enough, the thought hurt, like little pinpricks piercing your chest.

Surprisingly, Shirabu is the one to break the silence that fell over the gym.

“Why does the council need to know how many students I think are going to join next year? How could I possibly guess that?”

You roll your eyes at his griping. “Just fill out the damn form.”

Uncaring of the dilemma threatening his fastidious nature, you grinned as his jaw clenches. He’s put you through psychological torture for a month now, this was only a taste of the frustration you felt.

You felt a little vindicated when he huffs out loud at another unnecessarily specific question.

Fuck what Natsuki said, this was exposure therapy at its finest. If you could do this without admiring his body in some way then that’d be a victory. And you despised losing, so you were intent on winning this as well.

Easier said than done.

Your eyes lingered on his lips as his tongue darts out to wet them. They further stray down the column of his throat and settle on the hand scribbling down information. His hands were surprisingly slender for a guy, but no less deadly. You’ve heard about his pin-point accurate tosses and serves. You knew firsthand the mistake of underestimating his strength.

“What?” He snaps, noticing you intently staring at his hands.

“Nothing,” You sniff, trying to look disdainful to cover your embarrassment at your wondering attention.

‘For fuck’s sake, pull yourself together woman!’ You inwardly admonish yourself.

For Kenjirou, this was the last straw. He tried carrying on as normal after the incident, he tried not biting back for the sake of decency, and yet your attitude flips on him out of nowhere. He’s tired of all of this shit.

Letting the papers fall to the ground, he grabs your wrist in an iron-hard grip and bangs open the door of the storage room beside you. Fed up with your attitude, Kenjirou knew that confronting you about it could blow up in his face but he couldn’t stand his last few weeks of high school spent with your bitchy demeanour.

“Hey! What the fuck?” You protest, pulling against the tight grasp he has on your wrists as he kicks the door closed pulls your further into the dark room.

Not listening to your complaints, he pulls you behind the high stack of mats and shoves you against the shelving unit. The shelves uncomfortably dig into your back as he cages you in, arms placed beside your head, breaths intermingling.

“This has got to stop.” He growls.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” You raise your eyebrows at him, outwardly acting unaffected. Internally, your heartbeat thundered in your ears, deafening you with the excitement you felt.

“Oh, so now you want to act normal?” He snorts.

“Fuck off.”

For the past three years you’ve taken enough of his shit. You thought denying the issue attention would starve him and he’d get bored. How wrong you were. Instead you managed to piss him off even more, evident by the way the air vibrated with the tension between your bodies.

“I bet you can’t get me out of your head,” Shirabu says lowly, possessive grip on your hips tightening minutely. “Maybe that’s why you refuse to meet my eyes.”

“Don’t sound all high and mighty. I bet you get off with my underwear that you stole, asshole.” You bite back, defiantly meeting his gaze head-on to prove him wrong.

Unexpectedly, Kenjirou flushes. If you didn’t know how big of a prick he was, you’d almost think it was cute. Now though? It was all you needed to know that was exactly what he’s been using your stolen panties for.

“Oho, hit the nail on the head now, did I?” You tease, drawing your faces close enough to see the faint freckles that were hidden by the redness.

“Shut the fuck up.” He says warningly, a hard expression on his face.

“Or what? You’ll gag me again? Oh no.” You challenge, lips pursed in faux concern.

“No,” he drawls, brushing his thumb across your lower lip. “I want to hear you beg for me this time.”

His thumb presses down hard, preventing you from responding coherently . You glare at him from under your eyelashes, not liking the smug look on his face at all.

His titillating tone had your horny hindbrain rearing to go. Meanwhile, your forebrain was too stubborn to give in just because he was wanted it, despite you wanting it as well.

Shirabu’s eyes dart from your eyes to your mouth, watching your tongue flick at his thumb. He replaces it with his index and middle finger, pressing down on your tongue and admiring the way your tongue melded around them. It was the best way he could stop your witticisms for one fucking second.

“You’re so much cuter when you’re not talking.” He sighs, feigning a wistful tone.

You scowled at him, hating the fact that he was enjoying himself and that you were weirdly enjoying it as well. His other hand migrates southward, slipping up underneath your skirt. The brush of his fingertips leave a tingling sensation on your skin as it makes its way up your inner thigh.

Your knees lock up as he brushes along the edge of your panties. Unable to take his intense focus on your face, you shove shove his fingers out of your mouth and pull him down into a kiss. Much like the first one you two shared, there was much more teeth and tongue involved for it be labelled such, but you had no other word for it.

As his tongue slips in, Kenjirou forcibly rubs against the wet spot he found. He pressed against it, testing how far the fabric would stretch. You keened into his mouth at the rough feeling of the fabric stroking against your folds.

Breaking the kiss, he leans his forehead against yours. His fingers move the panties to the side and you finally get the skin-on-skin contact you’ve been craving. Stroking your bare folds and smearing the wetness around, Shirabu manages to touch you everywhere but the place you wanted him most.

“If I didn’t know better, I would’ve thought you never done this before.” You tease, hoping to urge him on but unknowingly sealing your fate for another rough night.

Shirabu’s ministrations stop and he levels you with a serious expression – a dangerous glint in his honeyed irises.

“I’m going to make you beg for me.”

Committed to his promise, he buries two fingers into you without concern. You yelp at the burn of the sudden stretch and lack of lubrication. As if you didn’t think you were insane as it was, you could feel yourself get wetter at the lick of pain. Kenjirou smirk as he watches your face screw up as he pumps and twists his fingers inside of you, feeling you become wetter around his digits.

Skillful fingers make a mess of you. Unable to support yourself on weak legs, Shirabu and the shelving unit bare your weight as you pant and give breathy sighs whenever he makes a particular set of motions that has heat rushing throughout your body and your hole gush.

It wasn’t long before you could feel that heat accumulating low in your gut. Throwing your head back and letting out a lengthy moan, needlessly warning Shirabu that you were close.

‘Just a little more,’ you thought desperately, ‘just a little more and I'll be there.’

Kenjirou knew he was a sadist at-heart, told many times by Taichi and his seniors for pushing the younger years during practice. He never had the chance to explore it with a partner before and while he never imagined you to be the one, he found himself enjoying your sinful expressions and sounds.

With a cruel smile, he watches your reaction as he pulls his fingers out of you. You Eyes fly open, hips pausing in their mindless rolling and a complaint rises to your lips.

“You fucker.”

He laughs at your reaction. it was exactly what he expected from your impatient bitchy self.

Instead of resuming the bickering from before, you force yourself to calm down. Closing your eyes and turning your thoughts inwards, you practice breathing techniques counsellors taught you for exam stress. The back of your mind registers his fingers skirting around the edge of your hole with enough pressure to cause your leg to twitch.

Envisioning the smug look on his face did not help you calm down. it caused your blood to boil all the more. Begrudgingly opening your eyes, your eyebrows furrow when you see his contemplative look.

Kenjirou wondered how long it would take for you to give in to him. From the way your chest was heaving, looking at him through lidded eyes, he concluded that it would be miracle if you could last more than two rounds of this game.

Determined to prove his theory, he ripped your skirt down with your panties in one smooth motion and slipped his fingers back into your greedy hole. It took a much shorter amount of time for you to get close this time, thighs tensing around his hand.

Trying to spread your legs wider, you’re stopped by the elastic waist of your panties. Annoyed, you step out of them and kick the skirt and panties away. Now freed, your legs spread wider to give Shirabu’s miracle hand more room to work with, which he gladly abused.

“Fuck.” You moan

“I’ve barely started and you’re already a mess,” He notes, eyeing your glistening eyes and the bared column of your throat.

“Screw you.” You hiss, thighs tensing as he works you back towards the high he ripped from you.

Kenjirou darts forward to deliver a harsh nip to your bottom lip in punishment. Not expecting it, you moaned at the bite of pain, tightening around his long fingers.

Believing you learnt you lesson, his lips move southward. Trailing down the column of you throat, his mind summons thoughts of your neck being littered with his mark. His hand increases the pace, brutally pumping in and out as the mental image makes his dick harden impossibly more.

The sting of his scalp as you tug at his hair pulls him away from the thought and in turn gives him another idea.

You smother the whine threatening to come out as he remove his fingers from your soaking hole, once again depriving you of that high.

Mildly confused, you watched as he loosens his tie and slips it over his head. It hits you a moment too late what he was planning. The fabric rasp against your overlapped wrists and tightens as he slide the knot down.

“I didn’t know you were into that, Shirabu. Mummy and daddy must be so proud of their little boy using their knot tying skills for bondage.” You comment, to which he rolls his eyes and forces your arms upwards to loop the other end of the tie around a pole.

He tests your new restraints by tugging at the knot. Satisfied with his handiwork, he turns his attention back to you.

“I was serious about you begging,” he starts conversationally, like you weren’t tied up and half naked. “I’m not going to fuck you until you do.”

“I’d like to see you try and get me begging, pretty boy.” You taunt him full-well knowing that you were starting to become a little desperate. Once clear mind was now clouded with a need that he’s been denying you over and over again.

Kenjirou knew this as well. Your legs were trembling minutely, your pupils dilated, and face flushed a cute pink. He could tell you were close to breaking. He was mildly surprised that you survived this far in, but your resilience – more like stubbornness, he muses – only served to make him all the more determined to break you.

Unlike before, it starts off slow. Calloused fingers massaging your faintly pulsing walls as you roll your hips against his palm. Just when he lulls you into a sense of security, the pace is amped straight back to maximum and fans his fingers out.

Kenjirou scissors his fingers as he pulls out and twists his wrist as he draws out. This had your eyes rolling into the back of your head, loud moan reverberating off of the walls.

It takes only a few pumps and a twist to have the heat grow and spark inside of you as he brings you closer to an orgasm than the previous times.

Kenjirou can feel the tell-tale fluttering of your walls, thighs clenching around his hand, as if trying to force him deeper. Easing up, he lazily pumps his digits in and out, watching as your expression twists into a pained one as he rips yet another orgasm from you.

“Fuck me already.” You moan, fed up with the ups and downs. You both loved and hated Shirabu having all the power right now. You’re sure this was something you’ll contemplate once this is all said and done.

“You know what I want.” He massages your walls and brushes against a sensitive spot.

A moan cuts off your words, walls clenching down on long fingers that weren’t enough to scratch the itch deep inside of you.

“Say it.”

Kenjirou buries his fingers inside of you, this time deeper than before, reaching spots that your own failed to reach. You very nearly screamed at the sensation. Shirabu was pushing you to your wits end without any effort.

“Please! Just fuck me already!”

The tears gathering at the corners of your eyes spill as he hastily pulls his fingers out of your sopping core. The sound of a zipper followed by fabric dropping to the floor fill your ears as Kenjirou hastily preps himself.

Smearing the juices from your dripping hole onto his length with slick fingers, Kenjirou catches your eyes as he strokes himself and smirks at your curious look.

A blush sears onto your cheeks at his look. Last time you didn’t get to take a look at his member, even though you became intimately aware of its slight upwards curve, you had to admit to yourself that his length was impressive. You’d rather cut out your own tongue than tell him that, so you make sure your face devoid of those thoughts.

Kenjirou doesn't waste a moment as he grabs your thigh and wraps it around his back as he lines himself up. The breath in your chest stalls as his tip prods at your entrance.

“Good girl,” He breathes as he finally enters you inch by excruciating inch.

Head dropping back, your arms strain against their restraints as his dick perfectly fills every crevice inside of you. The slight sting of the stretch brings more tears to your eyes, but it was soon overshadowed by the liquid pleasure that coursed through your veins as he starts rocking up into your warmth.

The shelves rattle as each thrust jostles you back. You were unaware of the pain caused by them digging into your back as each stroke already had you becoming closer and closer to your peak. The friction alone from his hurried pace had your toes curling and mind wiped of coherent thought.

Having you tied up and at the mercy of his whims had blood rushing from his head to his dick. It was an incredible feeling to tame your fiery spirit, creating a high that he could see himself chasing for the rest of his life.

“Look at you, taking my cock like the good cock-slut you are.” He pants into your ear.

You moan loudly, not giving a single fuck for any unfortunate soul that might still be in the gym, as your evasive orgasm finally comes into arms.

Your walls tighten around Kenjirou's length hard enough for him to hiss. Kenjirou knew you were close, moans reaching a new pitch. As a reward for you being compliant with him, Kenjirou lends you a helping hand. With a few strokes of your sensitive bundle of nerves he tips you over the edge.

Sparks coalesce inside of you and dance along your skin as you orgasm, creaming over Shirabu’s cock. Your vision turns black, but the feeling of Shirabu fucking you through your orgasm intensifies as he works through your tight warmth, seeking out his own peak.

“Kenjirou.”

Hips jerking out of motion, Kenjirou nearly chokes on his tongue as his orgasm sudden crashes down on him at your call of his name. Burying himself as deep as possible, cum sprays inside of you with considerable force as he unloads inside of your hole.

“You sound so good begging and moaning for me,” He pants. “It’s the only time where you’re not being a bitch.”

“Like you can talk Mr. When-I-Talk-Over-Someone-I’m-Automatically-The-Winner. You’re no better-”

Abruptly pulling out, Kenjirou replaces his cock with his fingers, pushing his cum back inside of your leaking hole. A weak groan rattles your chest as his fingers brush against sensitive hole, holding their position.

“As you were you saying?” He says smoothly, knowing he’s robbing you of speech as he applies more pressure to your hole.

“You fucker.” You grit out, tugging at your restraints as you automatically move to try and move his hands away, the full feeling of his hot cum inside you becoming overwhelming.

“A reward for being a good girl.” He breathes into your ear, causing a shiver to consume your form.

Reaching up with his free hand, Shirabu single-handedly undoes the knots of his tie and frees your wrists. You’d be impressed by this if it weren’t for his two fingers rubbing incessantly against you the entire time, making your vision fritz at the edges.

Arms falling to your sides, the blood rushes back into them and the feeling of static pairing wonderfully with the way Shirabu’s digits moved against your abused hole.

Pain flares up in your wrists when you grab his hand to stop his unrelenting movements. Working through the pain, you move his hand away. As Shirabu pulls away from you, he avidly watches as his cum drains from you. You swallow thickly at the sensation of warm globs trailing down your thigh.

Disgusted at the feeling of it drying, you glance around and spot a roll of paper towel sitting on the shelf beside your head.

You busied yourself by cleaning up the mess Shirabu made of you as the devil himself also wiped himself off.

Leaning down to pull up his shorts, Kenjirou notes the red fabric sticking out from your skirt piled on the floor. Surreptitiously checking that you weren’t paying attention, he tucks the fabric into his pocket with a sly grin, claiming his rightful trophy to his second conquest.

Glancing over to Shirabu as you pick up your skirt, you find him tucking himself back into his shorts with a carefully blank look on his face. You eye him suspiciously, unknowing of what he was going to do or say next.

“Here’s the key, lock up when your done and give it back tomorrow.”

You scramble to catch the key he tosses at you, dropping your skirt in the process. He doesn’t wait to hear your complaints, giving you one last long look and waltzes on out like he didn’t have you tied up and fucked senseless not even five minutes ago.

Incredulously, you watched his back disappear around the corner. Shaking your head, you go to pick up you skirt again. Noticing the absence of red fabric inside of the purple plaid, you looked around the floor, hoping that maybe you kicked them under the shelves.

After one quick look around, the fate of another pair of your favourite panties hits you like a brick to the head.

“Motherfucker!” You scream after him.

The deep laughter in the distance filters through your ears and fanned the hatred simmering inside as well as the blush doing its best to turn you into a strawberry impersonation.

Leaning against the shelving unit, chest heaving and sweat drying along your skin, you swore to fix the part of you that craved Shirabu's touch.

Notes: Too bad I can’t write degrading stuff without looking too far into it because goddamn does Shirabu suite it. Hope you enjoyed this indulgent fic!!

#shirabu kenjirou x reader #shirabu kenjiro x reader #shirabu kenjirou #reader-insert #haikyuu reader insert #haikyu!! x reader #head filled with nothing but shirabu recently #shiratorizawa #haikyu!!

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syms-things-5 · 3 years

Text

Clear The Area - Chapter Seventeen

Previous Chapter Here

Warnings: Strong language and an air of discomfort.

Notes: I hope this reads OK as it’s quite dialogue-heavy.

Tags: @kelbabyblue @jennmurawski13

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

The night shifts weren’t all bad. From time to time, they were even as good as “pretty straight forward”. They proved especially useful when trying to finish patient notes and random admin that always got left to the very end of the shift. Perhaps they’d endure a tidy-out of the stock cupboards if the crew was feeling generous. Since O’Brien had taken up his post at the hospital years earlier, he had insisted upon mandatory training updates for the ER units every three to four months (the national average was about once a year) so the team were regularly reminded not to set fire to their computers and not to leave boxes in places people could trip over. You’d be surprised how often both those things happened in an emerging crisis.

“I swear he thinks we’re idiots half the time.” Complained Jack, his head now glued to the palm of his hand. Jack was hurtling towards an early retirement thanks to an ever-increasing distrust of the corporate environment ER departments found themselves in. We trained to save lives, he’d say, not file stat reports. He was so right, it hurt.

The crew was sat round the reception desk. The ER was empty except for a local homeless man the team allowed in from time to time to sleep off his latest drunken adventures.

“Who doesn’t know how to bend their knees when lifting something heavy?” Jack asked again.

“Ryan for one.” Sarah joked, pointing her cold cup of tea towards the fellow nurse in question. Ryan was a tall and skinny guy, not dissimilar to Alexander Skarsgard in the right light but with less charm although he had left a few of the interns swooning of late. Shanna quite liked him, too.

“One time, Sarah. One time and I suffered for it greatly.” Ryan remarked, spinning a full 360 in his swivel chair. “Did you tick ‘agree’ or ‘strongly agree’ for question eleven?”

“Oh, if you don’t tick ‘strongly agree’ even if you only ‘agree’, they mark you down a couple of percentage points.” Entered Audrey, slamming down a pile of files on the desk beside Sarah. Their nightly routine just got more interesting. “Just get it over with. It’s not worth the effort. It’s just O’Brien being obsessed with stats again. He turns everything into a competition. I swear it’s unhealthy.”

Ryan looked momentarily confused before returning to face his computer screen. He re-read the question for the fifth time and rubbed his eyes in resignation. Something about 3am made this far too complicated.

“When did you even find time to do this, Aud?” Jack asked, turning back to Sarah and Audrey in time to witness their shared look self-satisfaction. “I’ve been sat here for half an hour and am still only part way through the first section.”

“I logged in at home earlier.” she responded before catching Sarah’s quizzical look. “Well, Michael did most of it for me.”

“Fucking hell!” exclaimed Jack, chucking his pen on the table, giving up. “Got no chance then, have I? Michael’s a bloody genius. Hey, how much for him to do mine?”

“Normally I’d say $100 but he’s pretty cheap these days.” shrugged Audrey. “Probably a fancy cigar would do.”

“He still grumpy about the you-know-what?” whispered Sarah to her friend when the guys started joshing between themselves.

Audrey leaned back on the desk beside her and took the mug from Sarah’s hands to take a sip, grimacing slightly at the sweetness. For some reason, Sarah had to have at least three sugars in her tea if she was drinking it post-midnight. It helped to keep her more alert apparently. She didn’t drink it like that at any other time of the day. “No more than usual. Seems like we’re both unlucky in that department at the moment.”

Sarah smiled at her in acknowledgement, lips thin before biting the inside of her cheek.

Following their last meet-up, Chris had been decidedly quiet. Too quiet almost. It was weird. He hadn’t messaged her. He hadn’t called or visited their apartment except to collect a parcel he had left. Sarah has been out for a run at the time and had felt silently glad to have missed him. He hadn’t updated his twitter and there had been multiple sports events occurring that would have guaranteed a humblebrag or five. Shanna had pledged to buy rib-eye steaks for a Saturday night meal during a Celtics game and he had cancelled at the last minute citing an interview he had conveniently forgotten. Even Audrey thought it was weird. If anything was guaranteed to get his attention and bring him out of whatever funk he was in, it was the promise of sports and a ‘Grade A’ barbeque.

Shanna merely put it down to his laziness or him having something better turn up. Scott had started replacing Chris around their apartment, wanting to get some of his own distance from the tricky Zach situation and it helped her feel better knowing he was at least in touch with him if Shanna wasn’t. He was evidently still alive.

Sarah decided to swap a couple of daytime stints to partner up with Audrey for the nights. She needed the comfort of working with a good friend to calm her down from whatever ledge her anxiety had placed her on.

“You know that he’ll come back, right?” Audrey interrupted her thoughts. Maybe Sarah spoke too soon. “Haven’t you got that birthday thing for Lisa coming up?”

That trip was a couple of weeks away yet. She was trying to bank some reasonable excuses but everything sounded lame in the cold light of day and Lisa was never going to accept her not coming as well. Surely things would have smoothed themselves out by then?

“This won’t just fix itself, hun, you’ll need to speak to him eventually. And the sooner the better.”

It was like Audrey had a hotline straight into Sarah’s psyche. It was unnerving at the best of times. Sarah knew she was right of course. It’s just, a little bit of distance would be a good thing, right? Even Chris himself had offered that advice from time to time, and stressing herself out at this point almost seemed counterintuitive.

“I reckon you could go in an hour or so if you wanted.” Audrey offered, nudging her friend with her elbow to bring her back into the room. “It’s dead out there.”

“I hope not.” Sarah joked, trying to lighten the mood. “We’d be shit at our jobs if that was the case.”

Audrey laughed for the first time since Sarah could remember that day. It was moments like this that reminded her of why she enjoyed working alongside her so much, and why she didn’t mind if it resulted in overtime.

“You wanna take patient referrals while I take the EPRs?”

“How can I refuse an offer like that?” Sarah picked up the dozen or so documents sat in front of her and grabbed the nearest chair. Audrey told her she’d put the kettle on and nudged the guys still glued to their screens. Ryan had pretty much given up logical thinking and was now ticking random boxes. Jack was cursing under his breath. O’Brien was going to be in for a real treat when he could finally tabulate the responses.

It was nearing 6.20am when Sarah and Audrey finally packed up to go. Matt and Stephanie had just arrived to take over for the morning, bringing a fresh perspective for the day. There wasn’t much for them to catch up on so it should be a smooth few hours at least. Sarah even ran a mop through the staff locker room as an added gift – Steph was a notorious clean freak – nearly tripping Greg up in the process.

He’d been on leave for the past fortnight and his hair was a little longer than she remembered. A five o’clock shadow graced the lower part of his face and it suited him more than she thought it would. He had kept up with the informal tie-less attire and he seemed to be, dare she it, enjoying himself.

“God, I’m so sorry.” She held her hands up in a mock mea culpa. “I was just gonna put it away before heading out. It was a stupid place to leave it.”

“Did you not take the Health and Safety refresher?” he joked, rebalancing himself and trying to play down the redness creeping into his cheeks from the embarrassment of temporarily losing his footing in front of her.

“You gonna rat me out to O’Brien? ‘Cos you know as well as I do that he doesn’t need yet another reason to know he’s right.” She shifted the mop and bucket and placed them back in the supply closet before reaching for her bag again.

“Nah, don’t worry about it.” He moved passed her before turning to face her again. “Tell you the truth, I ghosted the last couple of tabs myself. Who knew there were so many ways to ask questions about standing in elevators?”

Sarah rolled her eyes in acknowledgement. “Yeh. I can’t wait to have the team meeting when he realises we’ve all pretty much done the same thing. That’s gonna be fun. I might finally take some of my holiday.”

“Yeh, good plan. Hey listen,” His words stopped her in her tracks, feet from the exit. “Um, I know it’s been a while but I was wondering if you might want to reschedule that tennis match some time? Or if not, we could get some dinner or something? There’s that new sushi place on Reagan Street. It’s meant to be really good if you fancy it?”

She was indeed familiar with that very restaurant thanks to the glowing reviews she had been unable to avoid since it opened. Audrey had only mentioned it a mere thousand times in her presence. Word was that bookings were now months in advance so she wasn’t sure how Greg was hoping to find a table unless he wanted to make plans with her in November. Given the number of commitments he always appeared to have going on, it wouldn’t be completely outside the realm of possibility.

“Wow, I thought that place was fully booked?”

“Yeh, it is, but I went to college with one of the investors and he’s promised me a one-off.”

Of course he did. Sarah bit her bottom lip to stop herself from chuckling out loud, imagining Audrey’s face when she would inevitably find out. To be honest, she was genuinely surprised he was still showing a minor interest in her. When she finally made eye contact with him, his earnestness was practically shining. Had he always had perfect skin?

“Um…” That was a good start, she thought.

“Honestly, it’s not a big deal if you’d rather not.” He helpfully pre-empted her awkward rejection but she wasn’t sure if that was a good thing. “I’ve been meaning to go is all and I knew you liked sushi and figured it might be fun? They have live Jazz on Sunday nights.”

When did he find out she liked sushi? And live Jazz? Just how much had Audrey told him about her?

Realising she probably looked perplexed, she shuffled her shoulder strap back up onto her shoulder and tried to relax the awkwardness setting in between them. It was still quiet and no one was within earshot that she could figure out of her peripheral vision.

“It’s not you, Greg, I promise. It’s just, I’m not really looking to get into anything right now. With anyone. Plus, we work together and…I’m sorry. I hope that’s OK?”

“Hey, look, I promise it won’t be awkward. There’s absolutely no expectations from me and if you change your mind, just let me know, yeh? I literally know no one else who likes Sashimi so I can’t waste my only chance to get a table.” He chuckled and she felt more at ease.

“If it’s any consolation, I’m a pretty crap date.” She smiled at him as she edged herself down the hall, putting space between them both literally and figuratively. “You wouldn’t be missing out.”

“Oh, I doubt that somehow.” He returned her smile. “I’m serious, though. Just let me know. Anytime. No expiration date.”

And with that, she had been left dumbfounded by two men in the space of a single week.

It would have been easier to get the early morning bus home at this time, as tired as she was starting to feel. She hadn’t slept well in the last few days and she had a creeping nausea from the lack of proper rest. The walk and crisp, fresh air might do her some good. It was practically full daylight even at this hour, and it was sometimes fun to watch people on their own way to work, huffing along, trying not to drop their coffees.

The out-of-town school bus passed her a few minutes out from her apartment and as she rounded the corner, she got this weird sense that someone was watching her. Another corner turned and she could see her building in the near distance. Still, she couldn’t shake it. She stopped, pretending to fumble for her phone in her pocket and turned around swiftly to see a sweaty Chris stop a few steps behind her.

It took her a moment to register it was in fact him, his beard fuller and a Red Sox cap pulled down low over his eyes. He had sweats and sneakers on and looked like he was on a run. Honestly, if someone else had spotted him from this distance, they would have worried he was going to attack her.

“Hey,” she said, turning to fully face him. “What are you doing out at this time?”

He didn’t respond at first. He shuffled from one foot to the other before grounding himself and taking a couple of steps towards her. Again, he shuffled back a step like he was rethinking his move. She didn’t appreciate seeing him like this, so unsure of himself.

“Five months out from filming some pre-shoots so figured I’d make a start.” He finally spoke. Not a really a smile but he at least sounded OK.

“Cool.” She said, nodding back at him. “Um, I’m not sure if Shanna is awake yet but do you want to come inside for some water or coffee?”

“Yeh, that’d be great. Thanks.”

She turned to continue walking on. For a few long moments, he stayed walking slightly behind her. A couple more strides and he had decided to catch up. The last time it had taken this long to walk this same street, she had been so drunk she had narrowly avoided falling into her neighbour’s front garden.

“Five months? You’re not that out of shape.” She tried to make a joke. It was the only thing she could think of. Audrey would be eye-rolling like a champ if she could see them now.

Chris knew she was trying to make small talk now so he decided to indulge her. It was a fair response, he thought - he was doing OK - as he followed her up the stairs deliberately keeping two or three behind her in an effort to keep it casual.

“Oh, y’know. I fluctuate pretty easily. A few pizzas here and there and it’s game over.”

They walked into her kitchen and she had been right in assuming Shanna was still asleep. Unless she had awoken really early but that was highly unlikely, unless there was a sale at Ted Baker she didn’t know about.

He lingered in the doorway while she searched the fridge for a bottle of water. Grabbing one from the back, she turned to hand it to him expecting him to be within an arm’s reach from her but he had been distracted by something down the hall before turning back to her. Gratefully, he accepted it and walked into the kitchen to take up his usual spot leaning against the counter.

“Sorry, did you say you wanted a coffee?” She offered.

“Nah, I’m good. Can’t really take caffeine until this afternoon.”

“Sorry. I always forget how strict it is.” She apologised, offering him a sympathetic smile.

He took a long swig from the bottle, not breaking eye contact from her. “No need to apologise. You OK? Night shift?”

“Yeh. Pretty quiet, thankfully.”

“I’ve always meant to ask but what is it like, a night shift? I can’t work out if it would be worse or not.”

She understood what he meant and laughed. “It can go either way to be honest but it’s been quiet the last few nights. Nothing crazy. I caught up with some paperwork, so…” She shrugged again, acutely aware of how boring she must sound.

He nodded at her. “Aren’t people supposed to be crazier in the summertime?”

“Well, kids are around more and families tend to spend more time together, so…”

The apartment was unnervingly quiet now which was weird. She could hear the uptake in traffic outside which provided some relief that perhaps he couldn’t hear her heart beating out of her chest. She could make out some small sweat patches on his hoodie and it did something to her that she wasn’t expecting. Shaking the thought from her head, she turned to switch the kettle off.

“What?” He asked.

She jerked her head back around to face him. “Huh?”

“You were thinking of something. Your neck just went red.” He smiled, tilting his head at her and relishing the look of surprise making its way over her features, knowing he’d caught her out.

That was news to her. She knew she had “tells” but a red neck was not usually one of them. How come no one had ever told her about this?

“I can’t tell if you’re joking with me or not.” She inquired, playfully narrowing her eyes at him in an effort to lighten the mood.

He shrugged a shoulder at her, a smirk starting to cross his fine features. Joshing with her was good. She’d take that. A small step in the right direction.

“Sometimes, it’s really obvious. You get it when you’re embarrassed about something, or when you try to lie. I’d never really noticed it before, but...” He paused. His expression started to turn more thoughtful and she wished he’d just continue to make fun of her instead.

“Guess I won’t be playing poker anytime soon.” She finished the thought for him.

“Yeh, no, you’d be rubbish at that. Just terrible.” He took another swig from his bottle and waited for her to throw something at him.

“Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

The room went quiet again. She stirred her mug of coffee and offered him another chance at one which he politely refused although his discipline was waning slightly now he could smell it.

“So this is fine.” He said after a couple of minutes, nodding in a slightly exaggerated manner. He looked out of the kitchen window. “We can do this, right? No awkwardness. No embarrassment. Just normal, everyday conversation.”

“’Course,” she nodded in agreement.

“Start as we mean to go on, right?”

She nodded again. This felt like a trap and she couldn’t put her finger on why. Chris had a knack for saying and doing two different things at the same time, an intimidating ability that often put people on edge if he thought it would serve his purpose, whatever that may be. Probably the actor in him. When you called him out, he would aggressively defend himself which only served to prove the point you were making in the first place.

Scott was the only one, truly, who knew when it was happening. It had taken Sarah years to get to a similar position but now, she wasn’t sure she was remotely close to it.

“It’s as good a starting point as any, I guess.” She shrugged again, sipping from her cup.

“So there’s no need to ignore me then.”

“I haven’t been ignoring you, have I?”

“You tell me. I’m just pre-empting it is all. I’m just saying we can still interact, you and me, if we need to. Like, it doesn’t always have to be in social settings with other people around.” He took a final drink from his bottle and turned to locate the recycling pot stashed away in the corner. Even with a mundane task, he always looked cool doing it.

“So don’t worry about it.”

“Alright then. That’s good to know.” She shot him a raised eyebrow which he caught and returned with a sly smirk. “I’m just trying to be sensible. We have to get this right or else there’s no point.”

“I know, I get that, too.” If he wasn’t attempting to be serious before, he was now. He had a hand on his hip and seemed to have grown a few inches in height. “What do you think I’m trying to say?”

“I…think I’m on the backfoot again and it’s weird.” She held a hand up in defence.

“Hey, I’m just doing what we agreed, OK? I’m just following your rules.”

“They’re not rules.” She struggled to regulate the volume in her voice in case she disturbed Shanna. “And you’re making it sound like I’m controlling the situation when I’m not. We both agreed on this. There’s no point being difficult about it.”

Was he being difficult? Yes. Obviously, he was. He wasn’t happy. He wasn’t sure what he was feeling but happy definitely wasn’t it. Things were out of sorts and he hadn’t been able to eat carbs or sugar for four days so the withdrawal symptoms certainly weren’t helping. He should go easier on her. She was doing the thinking for the both of them. He should learn to be more grateful for that.

He scratched the back of his head and let out an audible sigh in frustration. “I’ll try harder, I promise. We’ve got that cabin thing coming up with Mom, so…I promise I’ll be good.”

He imitated the scout salute and she smiled at him, a smile not quite reaching her eyes.

Another night shift and Audrey and was starting to get suspicious. No one willingly switched for a night shift. For one thing, there was a disproportionate amount of recovery time. A couple of night shifts often took in excess of a week to recover from; a week that a nurse definitely did not have to spare.

“He been buggin’ you?” she asked, finally growing tired of the silence.

“Who?” Sarah looked up from the cabinet. “No, not really. We haven’t really spoken.”

“So why are you ignoring him?”

“I’m not ignoring him! Why does everyone think that?”

“Who’s everyone?”

Crap. Audrey had her there. Sarah open and closed her mouth without a sound coming out. She took a breath. “He’s not bugging me. He’s not. I’m just trying to limit the times we’re in the same place at the same time.”

“Huh, you’d think he would at least allow you to have peace in your own home.”

“Well, to be fair, he hasn’t been around all that much, but…at least I don’t have to worry about him showing up unannounced. It’s stupid but I feel way more awkward about him than I thought I would. It’s like I can’t even stand to be under his gaze.”

Audrey glanced at her friend, wishing she could offer some words of comfort. Even for someone as verbose as she normally was, she was finding it a struggle. Sarah wasn’t much looking for words of comfort at the given time either. She was all too aware of the predicament she was in and how much responsibility laid at her feet. In her mind, waiting it out was the only logical solution she could come up with. The only logical solution that didn’t require more conversations with someone who could feasibly run rings around her “theory” that if they just stayed apart for a little while, they would suddenly and magically forget about the past couple of months.

They stayed filing documents in silence again, the air seemingly getting thicker.

“You ever spoken with someone and it’s like they’re thinking the complete opposite of what’s coming out of their mouth?” Sarah huffed while shoving the cabinet drawer closed.

“Not really. That person’s usually me.”

“But why?” she asked. “Why can’t you just be normal?”

“I mean, it’s not my go-to response of course. It’s normally reserved for occasions when I am trying to indulge someone because I know they’re talking bullshit. Like, when I know Mike has been gambling but he tries to deny it? It’s just easier to figure him out that way.”

Sarah froze to the spot, looking at her friend. She breathed a heavy sigh and turned to lean back on the table behind her and crossed her arms. She stared at her shoes for a second.

“Chris is a smart guy. I’ll give him that.” Audrey muttered loudly so she was sure Sarah could hear.

“Give me something! I’m your friend here.” She implored her before chuckling to herself at Audrey’s face and her own apparent lack of self-awareness.

“You know what I think? You’ve probably got withdrawal symptoms from the all the amazing sex you’ve had and now you’re sulking. I think you should get back on that horse and let him fuck you again. That’s what this is.”

Sarah eyed her friend again. For once, she would love to hear someone tell her that she was right. “That’s really not helping, y’know.”

“And this is?!” Audrey’s shriller tone cut through the dry air, smacking Sarah right in the face. “Honey, this isn’t healthy. You hiding out in the hospital and treating it like your own solace is not healthy at all. I love you but you are your own worst enemy.”

“Alright, thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for your unswerving efforts to be honest with me at all times and not, like a normal pal, be comforting in any way.” Sarah comically bowed to her friend before considering leaving the office. She would have followed through with the idea as well if it wasn’t for the cosy warmth of O’Brien’s office versus the coldness of the ER department thanks to a leaking pipe. “It’s difficult. I’m sorry. I don’t wanna fall out with you, Audrey.”

Audrey just smiled at her. “I don’t know why you think you have to be the beacon of morality all the time, Sarah. Take a look around. No one else is. We all out here just trying to live our lives as best we can and a part of that is taking advantage of moments of happiness when we find them.”

Something about what Audrey was saying did resonate with her but comparing two months of happiness with Chris to ten years with Shanna was not something she could in good conscience do. Shanna was her security blanket. She provided a comfort of living with someone with shared life experience, of knowing how little you thought about yourself because you were given up as a baby. Honestly, from the very first day they had met, Sarah felt lucky to know her.

Yes, Shanna could be immature at times. Maybe a little selfish. She would often get carried away with trivial things and wasn’t the most reliable person, but what Sarah got in return was worth that and more. Her family enjoyed highlighting the maternal care Sarah would have to provide to someone who was seven months older than she was, but honestly it didn’t matter.

Maybe this was one of the rare occasions where Audrey was wrong.

Chris was a fling at best, Sarah told herself, when she was lying in bed struggling to fall asleep. When she was cold and missing his arms around her. They were both having shitty times and they both got something out of it. That was what Chris had said himself at the very beginning.

Chris 08.15am: You home? Shanna said you were working late again

It was like he knew she would be thinking about him.

Chris 08.17am: I really dont want u ignoring me all the time. This is hard for me right now as well

Fuck.

Sarah 08.21am: I kno. I’m so sorry I made you feel like that :(

He didn’t respond. She thought she saw the tell-tale three dots of him writing something but nothing appeared. Giving up on sleep, she got up and headed into the kitchen. Shanna had left her some bacon in the fridge and a fresh bread bun on the side so she turned on the grill and set about making some coffee.

She felt strangely awake for this time and the apartment was nice and warm from the bright sunshine streaming in from all corners. Maybe a run would help. Or a cold shower.

Chris 08.44am: I wanna be honest with u but I dont think u want that

Chris 08.45am: so what do i do??

Fuck knows.

Chris 08.51am: Can I come over?

Sarah 08.54am: that’s not a good idea

Chris 08.55am: cos you know what will happen?

Chris 08.56am: what does that tell you??

She was sure he was nursing some kind of hangover or, quite possibly, he was still a little bit drunk. There were two responses she could give, she figured. The first would be her usual denial and perhaps an excuse that she was busy or working later than planned. The second, and ultimately the one she opted for, was to agree with him.

Sarah 09.05am: I know what it tells me. That’s why I’m saying you shouldn’t come over

Another three dots followed. There was only so many times they could go around and around in circles and as much as Audrey’s words made sense to her, it felt like she had to make the effort to regain some normality.

He didn’t respond. She stared at her phone for an age but nothing came through. Maybe he got the message? Maybe he had fallen asleep. She was both relieved and suspicious; Chris wasn’t someone who backed down from an argument when he thought he was right. He had said as much himself.

She turned the grill off, having lost her appetite. A run might make more sense and could help clear her head.

She couldn’t sit around waiting for Chris to make his next move.

#Chris evans #chris evans fic #evans fic #fanfiction #clear the area #sarah bernette #chris evans x original female character

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blisslilywrites · 4 years

Text

they’re not you.

#knbvdaychallenge2020

– Day 7 of KNB Valentine’s Week hosted by @vanilla-daydreams and @theuglycrybaby

A/N: Aaa this is the last day of the challenge. I hope everyone had fun with this cuz I know I definitely did. On a slightly different note...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ADMIN BLISS!!!

I know I gave you a gift already but here’s another one cuz why not hehe. ~Lily

Summary: You and Kise were the best of friends, but you had a secret crush on him for the longest time. However, with so many of his fans around him on Valentine’s Day, you start to get even more discouraged...

Your alarm clock just had to be broken today, the day you had a test during the first period no less.

You quickly grabbed your bag and ran out the door.

What’s even worse was that you burned a hole in your uniform too.

Dammit, mom’s gonna kill me.

Groaning, you hurriedly made your way to the train station and thanked the heavens when you saw the train hadn’t left yet.

You boarded and moved to the back of the train, where there weren’t as many people. The train doors closed behind you and you shivered slightly.

You reached into your bag for your jacket but didn’t find it there. Then you remembered that you left them in your room this morning when you hurried out.

You groaned inwardly.

Guess today’s gonna be a bad day for me. Should’ve expected it. I never have much luck on Valentine’s Day anyway.

You looked out of one of the train windows and couldn’t help but smile. The view may not be beautiful to everyone but it was to you. It was a view that just filled you with a calming sense of nostalgia.

Even today, with everything going wrong so far, it still somehow managed to calm you down, to some extent at least.

“You’re always being such a worrywart y/n-chi”

His words suddenly came to mind.

Just like the view from the train window, he’s one of the few things, or rather people, that could actually get you to smile and relax.

It’s not that you weren’t a relaxed person. It’s just that a lot of the people you were with, your friends and classmates at school, somehow brought out a tenser side to you.

That all changed when you met with Kise Ryouta though. Since the moment you two first talked, something just clicked. The two of you became really close and stuck together through thick and thin. He was what you deemed a really good friend, a best friend even.

Suddenly, your phone started ringing. You picked it up and to no surprise was greeted by Kise’s panicked voice.

“Y/n-chiii, where are you? Assembly just finished and class is about to start. Sensei also seems like he’s in a bad mood today. You better hurryyy.”

“Oh great... sorry Ryouta. My alarm clock broke and my uniform got burned and ughh I’m not really having the best start for today. But I’m on the train to school and I think I can make it in like 10 minutes max.”

“Ok. Just hurry though, I don’t wanna have to do this test myself.”

“Ryouta, you’re gonna have to do it on your own anyway.”

“I know,” he whined. “It’s just that I feel more confident when you’re around.”

Your heart swooned at this. Yes, yes, here you were in the classic “in love with best friend but can’t tell him for fear of losing him” situation.

“Oh crap. Class started. Gotta go. Hurry. Please. Byeee.”

“Right. Almost the—”

He suddenly hung up on you. You understood though. Your first class teacher was pretty strict and is almost always in a bad mood.

A few seconds later, you felt the train slow to a stop. You sighed in relief as you realized this was your stop. Quickly gathering your things, you made a beeline for the exit and ran the rest of the way to school.

-----

“How’d you think you did?” Kise asked you after class ended.

You had made it with just enough time to quickly finish the test. you didn’t have time to double-check the answers but at least you were able to complete it.

“I think I did good enough. I mean I did study a lot last night and the test wasn’t that bad so I guess it should be fine. How about you?”

“Well I have a great tutor so I’m sure I did good too,” he replied, winking at you.

A small blush crept up to your face.

Arghh, why’d he have to be all flirty and cute all the time?

As you were trying to calm yourself, a girl you’ve seen a few times before walked up to you and Kise. Completely ignoring you, she told Kise to come with her as she had “something important” she wanted to discuss with him.

You rolled your eyes.

Kise looked at you as if asking for permission. You told him it’s fine and to go with her.

“I’ll wait for you in class,” you said with a forced smile.

It was the same every year. Valentine’s Day just seems to give everyone ten times more confidence.

It honestly scares you a bit though. Even though Kise kept saying there wasn’t anyone he really liked, you kept worrying that maybe, one day, someone would come and steal his heart.

What’s even worse is that you were the main reason Kise was so popular.

It had started around middle school when puberty began to change Kise. At the time you were into photography and had also noticed how he had become much more attractive.

Knowing he was a naturally photogenic person and wouldn’t mind helping you out, you asked him to model a few pics for you. You posted them on social media and he immediately became a big hit. He told you he had fun doing it with you so you guys continued. Until of course, a professional agency scouted him. You two have still stayed close friends through it all though.

You’d always find it funny how much of a cliche the situation you were in was.

Girl meets boy. Girl helps boy become successful model. Boy becomes popular with the ladies. Boy meets another girl and falls for her. Girl is left heartbroken as she’s had feelings for him this entire time.

At this point, you’ve kinda accepted it already. You did want to tell him how you really felt, but you valued your friendship with him way more. So that’s why you just enjoyed whatever time you had with Kise. That in itself was already more than enough to you.You took a seat in the classroom and took out your materials, waiting for Kise.

You tried not to think about what was going on between him and that girl because, despite everything, you still can’t help but get jealous. It’s only natural but it’s a hell of an annoying feeling and you knew it would only get worse if you fixated too much on it.

Kise finally came to class a second before the bell rang. He held a small heart-shaped box in his hands. You glared at it but tried your best to hide your jealousy.

Fortunately, Kise didn’t notice anything off and quickly came to sit beside you.

-----

The rest of the day went by the same as every other Valentine’s. Kise would receive gift after gift and have to deal with all his fangirls and even some fanboys.

Today though, there seemed to be an extra amount of people giving him gifts, which you didn't think was possible.

Because everyone was always crowding around him, you decided to leave him for now. You felt kinda bad for him but there wasn’t exactly much you could do. Besides, you’d probably make things worse for him by being there.

When school ended, you waited at the train station for Kise. You remembered he said there wasn’t any basketball practice today and you were hoping the two of you could go home together. You had sent him a text telling him you’d wait for him here.

After waiting almost an hour though, you just about gave up and was about to board the next train when you heard a voice calling out to you.

“Y/n-chii! Wait!”

You turned and saw him running up to you. He had a few chocolates, roses, and even a teddy bear in his arms. He came to stop in front of you, panting.

“I’m sorry for making you wait,” he said sounding sincere.

You tried to give him a sympathetic smile. “Well, I’m assuming you were probably cornered by those love-crazed people again so don’t worry about it. It’s not your fault anyway,” you said more bitterly than intended.

Kise fell silent.

“Y/n? Are you ok?”

“Yeah, sorry. I'm just not really having a good day that’s all”

“Oh ok…”

Not knowing what to say you both stayed quiet.

You looked at the sign by the train tracks. There were 3 minutes left until the next train arrived. Kise gestured to an empty bench and the two of you moved to take a seat.

“Y/n,” Kise said softly. “There’s something I want you to know ok?”

You looked at him in slight confusion.

He cleared his throat and continued, “I may get presents and gifts from all those ‘love-crazed people’ as you put it. But none of them matter to me.”

At this, your confusion grew. What’s he trying to say?

“None of them matter, because, well because they’re not you.”

He looked at you, golden eyes shining.

It took you a second to process what he had just said, but when you did, you blushed heavily and quickly looked away.

He laughed, “Don’t be so shy y/n-chi. I thought you already knew anyway.”

“Knew what?” you asked trying to feign innocence.

“Knew that I like you of course,” he said with a suave smile.

“Oh,” your brain seemed to have short-circuited after hearing his words.

“Umm I like you too…” you mumbled lamely.

He smiled widely at you and you blushed back.

“Well if we both like each other I think it’s only right that I ask,” he said before standing up and extending a hand to you.

“Y/n L/n, will you be my valentine?”

You shyly nodded and took his hand, “Of course.”

The train arrived and he pulled you up, putting an arm around you as the two of you boarded the train.

Needless to say, what had started off as a bad day ended up being one of the best days you’ve had in quite a long while.

#knbvdaychallenge2020 #knb #knb imagines #kuroko no basket #Kuroko's Basketball #kuroko no basuke #kise ryouta #kise ryōta #kise x reader #kise ryouta x reader #knb x reader #knb kise

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diveronarpg · 4 years

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We’ve arrived at day four, everyone! Today, the admin team would like to take a moment to appreciate one another. Running a group for two years comes with many moments of excitement and joy. It’s incredible to see the plot make leaps and bound forwards, and watch characters that first began in our heads flourish into the player’s own on the dash. It also, admittedly, comes with its challenges; challenges we embrace with enthusiasm as a team, relying on one another and encouraging one another when life gets demanding.

For a DiVerona admin history lesson — Rosey and Jen first opened the group together in August 2018, preparing diligently to launch DiVerona and bring it to Tumblr after a few years of hiatus. Minnie acted as an invisible admin beginning August 2018, offering advice when requested, and came on as an official admin in MAY, 2019. Julie joined our team as the graphics admin in JULY, 2019 and ushered in a beautiful era and graphics revamp for Act II. Last, but certainly not least, Rogue was welcomed to the admin team in APRIL, 2020 to create stunning, heart-wrenching characters and continue building on the momentum of the plot.

Below, you will find a little love letter each admin wrote for one another. For this particular day, we will not be requiring any activity from our members. Feel free to take a break! If you’d like to show admin appreciation, you are free to do so, but we are not expecting it and hope you do not feel pressured to do so.

Thank you all for a wonderful two years of being admins of an incredible group like DiVerona!

JEN

My fire sign soulmate, my BITCH. As an admin, you bring aLL of the Montague spirit and heart and fire, and it shows in how passionate you are when guiding DiVerona’s story and development. Your creativity? Your flair for drama that inspires the most game-changing plot drops and the most iconic line in this group’s history? I mean, who else could have come up with infant king? For me, Jen, you embody the creative and collaborative spirit of DiVerona, and I treasure the fun you bring to the group and to the team. On a personal level, you have shown up for me time and time again. For that, I am so, so thankful for you. Your honesty is invaluable to me, whether you’re telling me I’m being impulsive or need to calm the hell down. You’re the sense of humor when we need it most, the ride-or-die who both starts adventures and cleans up the messes after, and my dear friend. — MINNIE

I’ve never met someone as passionate as you. You stick to your guns the whole way down and there’s something so deeply admirable in that -- you take such great pride in the things you do and how hard you work and what you bring to the table both as a writer and as an admin. We have exactly the same sense of humor and I love sending you memes and text posts through Discord at like, four in the morning, and seeing a reply from you when I wake up. It’s like taking a shot of orange juice right after rolling out of bed. Wakes me right up! You’re dedicated to the end, even when you’ve struggled, and I think that spokes both to your character and who you are as a friend. You’re like a sister to me in the sense I feel like we see right through each other, and I couldn’t be happier to know someone like you and get to work with you, even on opposite sides of the world. Our calls together are one of my favorite things to do -- we just click. <3 -- JULIE

Getting closer to you, Jen, has been one of my favorite parts of coming online as an admin. I have always admired you, I’ve always loved writing with you, but being your friend is one of the most rewarding things in the world. You have such fierce passion for things, all this burning intensity inside of you and an unflinching way of confronting the world that leaves me in absolute awe. The way you can always see around the corner to what a character needs (rather than what they want or what they might say) gives you such a great ability to build masterful plots and expand our world. Our shared weird insomnia has led to so many absolutely insightful, ridiculous, very hazy conversations, and I am shocked the team has put up with us for this long, but also more glad than anything in the world. Every word you write is precious to me, in character or out, and I’m going to save all of them forever so I can drag you within an inch of your life at ANY moment. Like a clingy little barnacle. I treasure both the experience of working creatively with you and of getting absolutely nothing done with you, and I love you with all my heart!! — ROGUE

to my idiot jen, sometimes i really can’t believe how we found each other again. i truly believe that it was no less than fate (and my utter disregard for any sense of self-preservation) that we would come into each other’s lives right when we did. i have never really questioned why or thought too much on how - because truly i cant really recall a moment where i didn’t know everything about you. there are so many things that i love about you: your tuna sandwiches and food pictures, our really really extensive aus, sharing with me every little frightening piece of your heart, forcing vulnerability and honesty and unconditional LOVE and being so very patient with me...over the past two years there has been so much that i’ve learned about you and still so much that there is still left to learn and love. i adore you to the moon and back you idiot. - ROSEY

JULIE

Hopefully you're not cringing too hard over this Very Formal Approach that I'm taking but trust me, if I could throw a meme in here somewhere I WOULD. Anyway, ever since you came on board, you've been nothing but a blessing to the team, and I mean that in every sense of the word. Your graphics and aesthetic vision for the group have inspired us in amazing ways, and beyond that you've lifted the team up with your pragmatic sense of judgement and gentle sensitivity to things. You really represent both sides of the same coin, dude, like… IT BLOWS MY MIND. I'm so happy to be sharing this anniversary with you, and I'm so proud of you and how far you've come ever since I met you, not just when it comes to the growth of your incredible talents but also when it comes to your writing and your maturity and pretty much everything about you. Thank you for being part of this amazing journey with us. I wouldn’t want to share it with anyone else. — JEN

Goosie, I really think you’re the closest thing to a renaissance woman I’ve met, not just in ability but also in who you are. Our entire admin team is pretty creative and original, but you are I think the true artist among us! And while your graphics are truly godlike and unlike anything I’ve ever seen in the RPC before, it’s in your writing I see it most. You’re the most versatile member on the admin team, Goosie, and I think you ground us in so many ways. Not just in doing major graphic makeovers or writing the single most iconic plot drop of DIVerona, but also with your kindness, compassion, intuition and self-awareness. I really would feel a little lost without you, Goosie - not only as an admin, but as a person! Every time you speak, I want to listen; every time you create anything, I want to frame it in a museum. I love you to fucking BITS, and I am genuinely so proud to call you buddy. (I thought about using friend instead, but buddy felt more accurate for us…) — MINNIE

Where would I begin? How can I even write a note when I feel like everything I do and every act I take is part of how much I love you, because it’s like, an entirely indelible part of me? Julie, you’re one of the most talented people in the world. Literally. Your writing is so piercing, so emotionally intelligent and brave and just vulnerable in a way I’ve never seen. Your graphics and art have such a passion to them; I think I love them because they’re beautiful, but I know I love them because I see little parts of you in them that delight me every time. I would crawl across broken glass to be a part of anything you do; I feel so lucky that I’m someone who often gets to see your works in progress, the messy edges of things, the half-finished projects. You bring such warmth to the team and such a grounded, different perspective; there have been so many times where we would entirely miss things if you hadn’t pointed them out when we were blind. You are our cornerstone, the one who anchors and glues us all together in so many ways, and I want to bask in that warm glow of your sunlight forever. — ROGUE

to my dearest julie, i wish i could just put a cody ko meme here but i am ABSTAINING EVEN THOUGH I FEEL LIKE YOU KNOW WHICH CODY KO MEME I WOULD PUT HERE. whenever i think about the times that i dragged you back into my life...like there are so many things in life i thank god i did but keeping you in it EVEN WHEN YOU TRIED TO ESCAPE MY CLUTCHES - that is number 1. having late night conversations with you about literally everything and anything makes my heart feel so full. you have been so much to me and trying to put it into words is really really difficult because none of them feel like they’re ever going to be enough. i love you for so many reasons: your humility, your determination to be there whenever, every single video and podcast you send me, your ability to listen and make people feel heard. you are special and if we are to take on this world i thank god i get to take it on with you. i love you. -- ROSEY

MINNIE

We complete each other and THAT'S JUST THE TEA. I admit, I can be a little over the top and just Too Much sometimes, but you always get me, and it's something that I appreciate more than I can put into words. You're the rock of this team, Minnie, and even though it's a pretty lame way of saying it, it feels right. I truly don't know where the team would be without you, but I know it wouldn't be anywhere near where it is now. You have a way of holding us together, of keeping us steady when we're weighed down or doubtful, with your kind heart, endless calm and unconditional support. I honestly don't know what to thank you for because it feels like there's way too many things and I wouldn't even know where to begin… but thank you for being here and being at our side through everything. I'm so proud of you and the amazing, one of a kind person that you are, and I wouldn't wanna share such a special moment with anyone else. — JEN

When it comes down to it, I think the best word to describe you would be a powerhouse. I’ve never met a woman in my life who works quite as fucking hard as you do -- and if not harder, then smarter, y’know? This past year I’ve spent getting to know you more and more, slowly wheedling you into opening up (motherfucker! We are Known in this house!) and sharing bits and pieces of myself, I’ve come to admire you just for who you are as a person. I’ve learned so much from you in standing my ground and not letting the wind blow me over. You’re funny and witty and sharp as a knife when it comes to your style of prose, and your love not just for Maeve and Paola but for the group shine through everything you do. You’ve held us all together like glue when we needed some extra assistance and let us know when we needed to pick things up, too. You’re open and honest with your feelings and I value that so much about you, knowing I can come to you and lay the cards down and ask your opinion on things and you’ll give it to me straight. I’ve never really had someone “at my back” in the sense of friendship, but oh man, Minnie, you make me feel safe, and I think you’ll know how much that means when I say it. -- JULIE

Oh, no, I’ve already been so embarrassing about how much I love you Minnie!! I suppose it’s only right I do it on main as well. I genuinely feel like I haven’t had another friend in my life who balances with me so well. When we’re united and on our peak shit, we complete each other, shoring up the places where we’re both insecure, making us both feel safer with each other nearby. I’ve written some of my favorite dynamics in RP with you, here at DV, and I don’t think I’d have grown half so much in my outside life or my rp life without you there to talk to. You are also the absolute rock of this team, to steal Jen’s words. When we’re all freaking out and afraid to act or worried about getting stuff wrong, you cut through everyone’s bullshit and get right to the heart of the matter. Your direct and straightforward way of speaking and of loving is a force for good in the world and on the team, and you are also maybe one of the funniest people alive, or at least in my acquaintance. I love your laugh, I love how open you are with your heart when you’re with us, I love you so very much. I want to write with you and talk to you for as long as you let me. — ROGUE

to twin-flame minnie, i wish you could see my face as i type this because this amount of vulnerability is making me like...ew. but minnie your soul resonates with me so much - never would i have ever thought in the time that we’ve known each other (it really did start with a conversation about glitter and then somehow just expanded from there and tbh i am not at all surprised) that i would bare myself to you as much as i have and felt completely and totally understood without having to say things in so many words. i cannot wait for the day when i can sweep you into my arms in a great big hug and i probably will cry when i do because i love you so much. there are too many things to love about you: from your signature giggle, to your ability to take on the world, to your conscientious growth as a person...you give me so much hope. and i don’t think it’s necessary to say anything more than that. i love you. -- ROSEY

ROGUE

When you first joined, you fit into the team so naturally, Rogue, it honestly felt as though you had always been a part of it. I remember being SHOOK AS FUCK at all the incredible things that you were doing in NO TIME, like, right from the start, you crafted the most amazing bios, offered the most rich and intriguing input for the plot, and helped us when it comes addressing issues and concerns in a way that made it all so much easier to tackle over time. Not to mention your sunny presence and the unconditional support that you offer, which never fail to brighten everything when we hit a bump in the road or things get a little tough. It's amazing to consider all that you've achieved and all the ways you've uplifted the team despite being with us for the least amount of time. In my eyes, you've always been with us, and I'm SO fucking proud of you and happy to be sharing all of this with you. Thank you for being a part of this team, and a part of this journey with me. — JEN

Maybe it’s a little cheesy to say, but I think the universe meant for us to meet, and having you on the team with us is a gift. We all mesh together so well and you pull things up out of nowhere on the fly, whether it be individual character plot development or actually writing The Most Iconic Plot Drop Of All Time(TM) and letting me tack on a little flourish at the end. You’re like... the cheese to my cracker, the whipped cream to my slice of pie, the biscuit with my coffee. We complete each other, and you listen to me when I really need to just word vomit all over the floor about something either entirely related or all too related, from time to time. I know if I need to call you anytime I can, and maybe my favorite memory of 2020 so far has been us watching Cats together and just suffering the entire time, but getting through it together. You’re funny, smart, endlessly endearing, work harder than the devil when it comes to threads and replies, and I’m grateful as all get out to have you with me in life!! -- JULIE

ROGUE, YOU REALLY CAME IN HERE AND SAID YEAH, I’M GOING TO SHAKE SHIT UP FROM DAY ONE. Whew, I remember one week you knocked out like four bios back-to-back and I just stood there trying to stop myself from booking a flight to your city and camping out in front of your house like the stan that I am. Sometimes, I still can’t believe there was a day you weren’t on the admin team because you not only fit seamlessly, but you also are just so essential now. Everything you’ve done in the few months since you joined our team, Rogue, has been *chef’s kiss* flawless. From the characters that I’m ANXIOUS to see on the dash to the ways you’ve helped guide our decisions and responses, I can’t imagine DiVerona and the admin team without you anymore! You brighten my day on a daily basis, and I love brainstorming with you, screaming with you, and I just love YOU! — MINNIE

to baby rogue, you see and know my True Sinner Nature rogue and the fact that you, in turn, have shared yours with me makes me feel so warm and bubbly inside - as well as makes me giggle. we really do have this habit of taking little smidgens of inspiration and connections and growing them into something extraordinary. geeking out about anything and everything within that encyclopedic brain of yours is one of my favorite things - our late night conversations, watching cursed together, plucking characters and plots from each other’s names as if they were already written in the stars...i dont know how to live without. there are so many things that i love about you: how you want to make everyone feel seen, how inclusive you are and kind, how you foster such creativity to others...i love and treasure you so very much. and we have so many more characters and worlds to explore together. -- ROSEY

ROSEY

I don’t think I'll ever forget the day that you asked me if I'd like to be an admin and offered me a spot on the team. It was just you, me and Bree back then and I was way in over my head, but you made me feel at home without even trying, honestly. DV is my first longstanding admin experience and truly the best one I've ever had, and it’s all thanks to you, which is something that I'll always cherish and keep close to my heart. I've looked up to you, learned a lot from you and felt inspired by you over the years, not just because everything was so new to me at the start, but because you're a guiding light for anyone who's lucky enough to have you in their life and share with you the experiences that I have. I'm so incredibly proud of everything we've done together, and proud of you most of all. Thank you for being the one to bring me along for this amazing journey, Rosey, and thank you for going through it with me for two amazing, unforgettable years. — JEN

I think, sometimes, that people think I’m joking when I tell them you saved my life, Rosey Ro, but you did, in a way that I would never have guessed. I felt utterly alone, coming fresh out of a physically and mentally abusive relationship, juggling court dates and other things that seemed impossible to conquer. I’d left Diverona unsure of my present, what I’d considered my past, and my future, but I happened to log into Discord one day and came upon that good ole’ 9+ messages notification. All of them were from you. Every single one. It felt like a sign, of some kind, and so, as I scraped my life together, we chatted and I re-apped for DV, and in spite of tumultuous times on both our ends, I don’t regret a fucking minute of it. You have truly helped me in figuring out who I am as an individual person, where I fit in the world, and with every crisis and “OH SHIT” moment, you’ve been there for me, whether it was in your writing, your jokes, late night calls with you, messages over Whatsapp knee-deep in irritation or excitement. You’re the older sister I never got to have. Without Diverona, my life wouldn’t be the same. Without you, my life wouldn’t be the same. I love you so much. -- JULIE

How far we’ve come since we talked about Greek life parties and glitter… Rosey, my sister sign and my mirror, the mother to my father, I love you very much. Your creativity is – as we all can tell from DiVerona’s success – UNMATCHED, and your heart goes even deeper than I think most people realize. For someone who writes some of the scariest and evilest characters, you are one of the most considerate, thoughtful and empathetic people I’ve yet to meet. Thank you for creating this space and reminding us time and time again that we’re more than just admins; we’re individuals with Big Feelings as well as Big Brains. You did an amazing job, Rosey. It doesn’t get said enough, and if I could, I would tattoo it to your brain if it meant it would stick: you created a beautiful group, and no one can take that away from you. — MINNIE

Rosey, Rosey, Rosey. All of this is your fault. I never thought I would join any kind of mafia RP, always having been prone to more fantastical settings in my preferences, but when you asked me to look around at the bios, how could I say no? How could I have known it would entirely change my life? Before DV and in DV, you and I have written some of my favorite relationships to work on, some of my favorite threads of all time. You pull out such creativity from me that I never would’ve imagined existed in my brain. I love you such a ridiculous amount. I could, would, and do talk to you about anything and everything. I want to spend like 50 years of my life fighting with you over whether Hope from Legacies is hot and indulging in our weird shared white boy thirsts. You are so funny, so talented, so bright, so interesting and I don’t know how I got so lucky as to be your friend. If you and I aren’t writing together when we’re 80 it’s because I died early and tragically and you wore a sexy fascinator to my funeral. — ROGUE

#diveronaadmin

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galunacycheckyourheadtour · 3 years

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How high?

Firstly of all, sorry I have not been keeping this as up to date as I had hoped. That is part of my problem - I always start things when so much other stuff is going on and feel guilty for not keeping it updated. I should have waited, but anyway, here we are.

Where were we...so I have had a bit of a month of it. I am so self aware I could see it coming. It is a bit like a tsunami after an earthquake - you know it is inevitable, it’s a force of nature and all you can do is try to get to higher ground. But that is not necessarily safe either. Being too high can be a bigger danger to me than being too low.

But that all sounds a bit riddle like. So to strip it back, I knew I was going to have a huge workload, a lot of pressure and no real support. Self employment, (even with a full time contract like I have), for all its pro’s can be incredibly isolating. I had to deliver back to back virtual events, something I had never done before, do all the marketing, social media, registrations, have a 3 day board meeting and deliver content for the associations annual meeting, as well as day to day admin work stuff in the space of three weeks.

I had to learn quickly - having never produced a virtual event, and probably gain some extra arms or a second brain or something. Usually when I am doing these sorts of events, they are live, there is support - people around me who can say something nice, get me a glass of water or offer to help. But here I was sat in my office - getting on with it. I work well like this to be honest, I get it all done, go above and beyond, all with a smile on my face - people never know what I really feel like. Once a client said to me after an event ‘I don’t know how you do it, you are constantly busy, staff and delegates all asking questions all the time but you are always so helpful and so positive to everyone around you.’ This to me was a huge compliment. I am one of the best actresses I know FACT. Pass that Oscar Paltrow - I’ll show you how to cry.

I had asked for extra resource a year ago and it was cancelled due to COVID, even though my work actually increased by 300% When help was offered a month ago, it was already too little, too late. It would have taken me longer to train or pass work on to someone, than just get my head down and do it myself. But that is always to my detriment.

I have been working on 5 different screens, 8 different social media accounts, 16 different whatsapp groups (this is why I hate whatsapp) all demanding different parts of my brain - 15 hour work days, no fresh air, not really eating and then I struggle to stop and get perspective. I don’t work in an industry where someone is going to die if I fuck up, but that kind of the perspective is nowhere to be found. Everything must be perfect - like a seamless operation.

Nobody has a clue what is going on behind the scenes, and that is the magic - they never should - because if they did, that means something has gone wrong. So, I am a complete perfectionist when it comes to my work - I don’t let things drop, I look at things from every possible angle, work out contingencies, problem solve on the spot, write briefs, manage people...I have to keep the plates spinning at all costs. (I will tell you the story how all my plates stopped spinning at one point - it links to New Orleans one of my milestone stops on my bike ride)

This is a really common issue for event organisers and not one that is talked about in our industry. The thrill of delivery which sometimes has been 6 years in the making, evolves to the post event blues. You feel ‘jangly’ (sorry probably not a word but it is what I use), pace around, trying to find challenges to solve, over communicating, not sleeping, feeling a bit invincible, drinking too much, just being a little over confident, taking risks, spending too much - until you crash in a little ball in the bottom of your wardrobe, not knowing what the hell to do except cry and hibernate for 3 weeks. You know that scene in Blackadder when he sticks pencils up his nose and says wibble - I get that. It is quite tempting to turn up on zoom and do that (I just tried to find pencils, will sharpies do?)

I have been working in events since I was 15 so I know this feeling all too well. I know it is coming and what I should do to avoid it. But when you are delivering everything in such a positive way - people don’t stop pushing you - they think you are fine and in fact, if I ever say ‘I’m fine’ to you - be concerned - maybe pry a bit more. You need to have someone around you with the emotional intelligence to say - hey, are you ok? I think you need to go outside for a walk - touch some leaves, hug a tree, smell some grass...throw a fucking great rock in the sea.

That is why I am so grateful for my counsellor - she works with me to make a game plan before I go into these periods and this time it helped - I would say I took on board 40% this time round but next time it will be more, because I am getting better. Plus I am getting support. So here are some of the things, they might help you or someone you love.

1. Go outside every day and look at the horizon (even better go look at the sea)

2. Keep hydrated, plenty of water (I put 2l of water on my desk at the beginning of the day - if it is there I drink it - if it isn’t then I don’t. Simple.

3. Avoid caffeine. I have been so bad at this my coca-cola addiction is rife and my new ‘hipster wanker’ coconut milk latte addiction has to be squashed soon - mostly as it makes me sound like a total prat!

4. Try to do some movement, yoga, ballet barre each day. Again, another thing I am bad at. One day I went to my desk at 5am and barely left until 10pm that night - ridiculous! I was walking like the hunchback of ND.

5. Breathe - I do something called EFT (tapping) I find that helps to do throughout the day. I have a little ‘mantra’ type thing - it sounds lame but actually whatever, it helps me and I will take what I can get.

So I am sat here, feeling a bit jangly but having done a nice 30 minute bike ride - the first one in a week. But knowing that is ok, I need to take it easy - don’t push myself, quietly observe, chill out, watch some films or some terrible reality tv and let the tsunami just lap over my feet while I rest in my hammock. I have 10 days off now, so this is time for me to reset. I am planning to hit my halfway point of my bike ride by the end of the month and that is doable I think - but no pressure. All I know is that I am going to get it done - I know that. Keep on Keeping on.

So I feel I might need to rewrite this at some point - it feels a bit rambling, but I wanted to just put it out there.

Keep looking at the horizon

#mental health #fitness #depression #anxiety #meetingprofs #eventprof #eventprofs #meetingprof #indoorcycling #mental heath support #awareness #journal #journalling #coping #worklifebalance

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goofygomez · 4 years

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Hallelujah - Clouis OneShot

Hey y’all! I’ve decided to repost all my works onto Tumblr for those of you who might not have heard of them or just prefer reading on this site. I will be shooting to post one per day starting today. I hope you enjoy. (Also, comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated <3)

Description: After having a nightmare, Clem finds Louis alone in the music room, and he shares something personal with her.

Wordcount: 3029

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Clementine jerked awake, covered in a pool of her own sweat. She’d been having nightmares again after what happened. This nightmare, however, did not concern the McCarrol Ranch, but Marlon’s untimely death, and the person who’d pulled the trigger. Ten days were certainly not enough to forget what AJ had done. She looked around and took in her surroundings. All the little trinkets she’d collected decorated the room, and gave it her own little touch. She looked at the deer skull on top of the door and grinned. It looks awesome, she thought to herself.

Fortunately for them, the rest of the kids had let her and AJ stay, at least until after the raider attack, which didn’t seem to be coming any time soon. It certainly had everyone on edge.

She scrubbed the grogginess from her eyes and lifted herself from the less-than-comfortable bed. She took a sad glimpse at the sleeping form of AJ. He’d been getting stronger, but still not strong enough. He’d never been shot before, and she had hoped that had stayed the case for a while longer. On their makeshift nightstand stood the wildflowers she’d found on that bench, though now their purple color had faded somewhat into grey.

“I’ll have to water them or AJ’ll have my head when he recovers,” she said to herself, frowning at the thought. If he ever recovers, that is.

“No, stop it Clementine,” she scolded, “He’s gonna be fine.”

She didn’t know how long she’d been talking to herself, but she estimated it had been around three years. Was she going crazy? No, she just needed someone other than AJ to talk to, that was all. She decided that she wasn’t helping anybody by standing around, so with a swift motion she grabbed her trusty hat and made her way to the courtyard.

Looking around, she couldn’t find a soul, which was strange. Maybe it’s earlier than I thought, she reasoned. The sun was barely scraping the roof of the school and yesterday really had been an exhausting day. Clearing the debris from around the school had not been an easy task, so everyone had volunteered to help in one way or another.

On a hunch, she turned around and walked into the admin building. Walking around the place seemed odd, like she didn’t really belong there. Of course, that much was true. She and AJ were merely outsiders to this place, guarded so strongly for close to nine years. And now it was preparing for a war with a group of raiders who were ready to take kids for their own battle up north.

Before Clem could delve further into her own thoughts, a soft, sweet sound caught her attention and she stood still, trying to pinpoint where it was coming from. She rotated slowly on the spot, until she realized there was only one place that sound could be coming from. Sighing, Clem walked down the hallway and opened the door to the music room, which was ajar.

Inside, she saw the hunched figure of Louis sitting on the piano stool, playing a soft melody that seemed to envelop the entire room as he played it. Clementine leaned on the doorframe for a moment, admiring Louis’s music. After a few minutes, Louis stopped abruptly and stiffened. Clem took a step forward and let out a breath,

“Hi, Louis,” she greeted lamely, hoping against hope that she hadn’t been the reason he stopped playing.

For a moment, Louis didn’t stir. He sat on the stool, perfectly still, looking at the keys with a sunken look in his eyes. The girl was about to talk again when he turned around and smiled at her. A real, genuine smile. It was the first one she’d seen him wear since that fateful night ten days ago. A silent, grieving Louis was much sourer than a happy, gleeful one, Clem gathered.

“Oh hey there, Princess,” he said with a wink in her direction, causing her eyes to roll and the beginnings smile to form on her lips.

“I hate it when you call me that,” she warned, trying as hard as she could to fight off the urge to keep smiling. She moved closer and sat on a small chair beside the piano stool, facing Louis.

“Yet here you are,” he rebuked, turning his attention back to the piano and pressing a couple of keys with no real pattern to it.

Silence fell between them once again as Louis started playing the beautiful song again. It filled Clementine with a joy and serenity that she hadn’t felt in a long time. It was as though, while that song was playing, everything that was going on outside came to a standstill. Time stopped for the two of them, and the only thing in the world was this room.

Then, to both Clem and Louis’s surprise, he started singing. It was a beautiful sound, Clementine decided, and the words seemed to roll off his tongue so elegantly, as though he’d sung that a thousand times over. She had the overwhelming urge to close her eyes, almost as if that would bring the lyrics closer to her heart.

“I’ve heard there was a secret chord

That David played and it pleased the lord,

But you don’t really care for music do you?

It goes like this: the fourth, the fifth

The minor fall, the major lift

The baffled king composing,

Hallelujah.”

Although Clem was clearly enthralled by the words being sung by Louis, the boy stopped singing and glanced at her, careful to keep playing the tune. She was so beautiful when she didn’t know she was being watched, Louis thought. The way her curly brown hair rolled over her face from behind her hat; the way her lips curled upwards as the muscles on her face relaxed and became accustomed to the music. There was really only one word to describe her, Louis gathered: breathtaking.

After a few moments of not hearing any singing over the piano, Clementine opened her eyes and eyed Louis quizzically. He was staring at her with a smile on his face. What was he looking at? Did she have something on her face?

“Why did you stop?” was all she could say when she realized the song probably had more than just the one verse.

Louis thought hard about the next words he said, before settling for, “would you like me to teach you? I am the best piano teacher in the world, currently,” he finished with a cheeky grin.

At the request, Clem’s golden eyes lit up with a sparkle that Louis figured had been lost long ago. He didn’t know why he knew this, but her demeanor around other people suggested she hadn’t had such a fun time growing up. Well, who had, anyway?

“You could do that?” her words cut through his thoughts and Louis put on his signature smile back on.

“Of course,” he assured her, “c’mere.”

Nodding, Clem sat beside Louis on the piano stool and set her small hands hovering over the keys. She eyed the piano with hesitancy, as if it was about to come to life and eat them both. Louis swiftly took her hands in his and moved her fingers to be over the C key, the E key and the G key.

“You know, for a walker killing machine you have the softest hands,” he commented before finishing the final touches to her hand placement. Clem couldn’t help but blush at his comment, though the reason for it was a mystery to her. Why was she embarrassed about that of all things?

“Uh, thanks?” she said uncertainly, her eyes darting from her mentor to her right hand forming the C chord on the piano.

“You’re very welcome,” he said, still smiling that devilish smile that seemed to light up the room more than the sun streaming from the high windows. “Now, you’ve got the placement down. Just press those three at the same time,” he instructed, pointing at her right hand.

She did as he said, and smiled at the sound that she had created. It wasn’t anything special, obviously, but it amazed her nonetheless. After trying a few times and perfecting that chord, they moved onto the other two. It took less than half an hour to learn the rest of the sequence, by which time Louis was ecstatic.

“You’re a damn natural, Clem,” he kept saying whenever she managed to string all four chords together. “Now it’s starting to sound more like it,” he encouraged, which made Clem smile.

She didn’t know what it was about him, but at that moment, she felt safe. Thoughts of the impending raider attack were pushed from her mind completely, and the horrors she had experienced lately were greatly diminished while they were in each other’s presence.

Louis felt his face hurting from smiling so much, and wondered how it was that he could be this way after what had happened barely ten days ago. Of course, he knew that already. He was with Clem. There wasn’t much to it, and he knew the reason he seemed to forget the world when they shared time together.

While Clem kept playing the four chords over and over, Louis cleared his throat and started singing again, this time starting with the second verse.

“Your faith was strong but you needed proof,

You saw her bathing on the roof

Her beauty in the moonlight overthrew you.

She tied you to the kitchen chair

She broke your throne, she cut your hair

And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah.”

Clementine must have zoned out somewhere during that verse, because before she realized she had closed her eyes and kept on playing from memory.

“Look at me, Louis!” she called enthusiastically, careful to keep her eyes closed as her fingers gracefully moved from a C chord to an Am chord.

“That’s great, Clem, I knew you were a natural,” he exclaimed. Only he wasn’t looking at her hands, but at her. The way her face lit up when she realized she could play with her eyes closed could have illuminated the courtyard, had it been night. Her cheeks were flushed with excitement, and she was laughing.

A genuine Clementine laugh was not something Louis got to experience often, so he soaked it in while it lasted. After a few seconds of hearing no more feedback, Clem opened her eyes and glanced at Louis. The question that had been forming in her mind finally made its way to her lips.

“Louis?”

“Hm?” he questioned, turning to the girl sitting beside him.

“Why were you here today?”

Boy, was that a question. Louis’s featured contorted into a frown and he looked away for a moment. It was no use hiding it from her; she had a way with faces, he knew.

“I wanted to tickle the ivories once more before the raiders come knocking,” he said nonchalantly, but frowned when Clem’s concerned parent look locked onto him. Sighing, he looked down at his hands.

“I just… wanted to play that song again. It’s been a minute,” he confessed, scratching the back of his head awkwardly.

As she stopped playing, Clem placed a tender hand on his forearm and looked up into his chocolate eyes. Those damn, beautiful eyes. What’s wrong with you, Clementine? Be there for him, she chastised herself.

“How long has it been?” she asked him softly, turning on the stool to face him fully.

“Last time I played it, it was on Marlon’s fifteenth birthday,” he told her, looking away again, fighting tears that threatened to break surface with his eyes.

“Oh,” was all Clem could muster when he shared that information. She knew Louis hadn’t been himself lately, and that was entirely because of the lack of one very important person. Marlon had been his best friend, his brother, and Clem and AJ had taken that away from him as quickly as two days after they’d saved them.

“Yeah,” he replied lamely, looking into her eyes with a sad smile on his face.

Before she realized, Clem opened her arms and embraced the boy in the most motherly hug she could muster. She cursed herself for being so awkward, but Louis actually leaned into the hug, wrapping his long arms around her and sniffing softly. They stayed like that for a few minutes before breaking apart and straightening themselves.

Louis was the first to recover from the wave of emotions that overtook both of them after that rather personal exchange. “Thank you, Clementine. I know I’ve been a dick lately, and I’m sorry. Haven’t really been the amazing companion I usually am. I just needed some time, you know?”

Clem shook her head and smiled at the boy, “you have nothing to apologize for. You had every right to be mad. I would have been, too,” she confessed, knitting her brows together in concern for Louis.

A soft chuckle left Louis’s lips, and Clem thought she was making progress. He raised his head until they were face to face and at that moment Louis realized something. He would have to stop sitting on his ass, and start acting. The past was gone, and he had to think of the future. With a long sigh, Louis straightened his shoulders and cleared his throat.

“Um, Clem?” he said softly. Such a smooth talker; damn it Louis, he cursed himself.

Her golden eyes scanned his hard features slowly before settling on his eyes. She looked deep in thought as well, though what thoughts troubled that beautiful mind of hers, Louis didn’t know. She nodded for him to continue and he did.

“Okay, I’m gonna get serious for a moment,” he began, nodding along as he said the words he’d rehearsed over and over in his head.

Clem’s eyes opened wide and she quickly placed the back of her hand on his forehead. “Oh my god, Louis, are you feeling okay? Should I get Ruby?” she mocked him, making a sizzling sound as she removed her hand.

“Ha ha, hilarious,” he laughed, rolling his eyes. “I thought I was the jokester here.”

“I know, I am too,” she reminded him, though she could sense he was actually being serious when he didn’t laugh at that. “Right, sorry. Continue.”

“I’ve been battling with myself for the last two weeks, and it hasn’t really been easy,” he started, fumbling over his own words and frowning at his awkwardness. Clem encouraged him with a smile and he sighed.

“Okay, I’m just gonna say it. I like you, Clem. As in, like-like you,” he explained, topping it all with a cheeky smile that contrasted with Clementine’s shocked expression.

The following seconds were a blur of emotions in Clem’s head. The first of which was astonishment. Louis likes me? Likes me, likes me? she kept thinking. She started grasping at the pieces of the puzzle and understanding took over her features. It all made sense now.

The senseless flirtations at every possible opportunity; Louis’s insistence that she come with them on hunting trips, even though they weren’t really speaking at all; his stupid query about her ever having had a boyfriend. Louis really liked her.

She racked her brains for something to say back to that, and came up empty. The truth was that she liked him too. As much as she hated to admit it, even to herself, she had grown quite fond of Louis in the past two weeks. Not only that but, even if Louis hadn’t told her, she knew he’d been the one to help AJ up after Marlon pushed him onto the ground. That had been the first time someone other than Clementine came up behind AJ and came out uninjured. She realized then that AJ must have really looked up to him to trust him the way he would trust Clem.

She couldn’t really lie, either; she did think he was cute. From the moment they met, that fact had been in the back of her mind almost constantly, but now it flew right past her eyes in front of her and screamed at her to go forward. Louis’s voice cut through her thoughts like a knife.

“Oh no, I’ve made it awkward,” Louis exclaimed, “whelp, gonna go throw myself into the river and never come back,” he started to get up but was yanked back down by Clem, who took a moment to look into his chocolate brown eyes before doing something she’d never done before.

She kissed him.

It was a sweet kiss, filled with the underlying feelings they were both feeling as they embraced. She felt as though she was sitting on a cloud, and she never wanted to come down. She couldn’t actually describe the feeling, though. It just fit.

As they broke apart, both panting from the intensity of the situation they now found themselves in, Louis searched her features for any indication that that was real. He thought he might be imagining things, but he could have sworn she was grinning with her eyes closed. She kissed me? was his only thought.

“I like-like you too, Louis,” she finally said, breathless. Even after that kiss, Louis was still baffled that those words had come out of her beautiful mouth. He took a second to savor the moment before saying,

“Wait, so when you said you had feelings for someone back at that game, you meant me?”

Blushing, Clem pursed her lips and looked away. “Yes,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Holy shit, it’s me!” he exclaimed, eyes wide as plates as he took in this new-found information.

Another kiss from Clementine shut him up for good. They embraced tenderly sitting as close to each other as the rickety piano stool would allow them. After a good few minutes, Clem broke apart from him and glanced at him quizzically.

“By the way, what was that song called?” she asked, the twinkle in her eye making her even more beautiful. As if that was possible, thought Louis with a grin.

“Hallelujah,” he said, embracing her again.

#fanfic #clouis #twdg final season #twdg clementine #twdg aj #don't judge me it was my first story

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