#SAGE AND ROSEMARY LITERALLY MEAN SO MUCH TO ME | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

the-witch-with-red-hair · 3 years

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ɢʀᴀʙ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴏᴏʟꜱ! 🛠

Wait, not those tools. These tools:

That’s better.

Good morning my witches and warlocks! Today, I thought I would talk about the tools of the Craft and what they are used for. Keep note, however, that tools are not needed for spells to work. They are simple an extension to help channel your focus and intent.

Starter Tools

When you’re first starting off in witchcraft, you’re going to be overwhelemed by all the options of tools there are for you to use. Let’s not worry about them all and start with the simple, most basic tools you’ll ever need to use.

1. Candles They are everywhere. From your local dollar tree to walmart, and sometimes your nearest gas station; you have a wide variety of places to choose from. Candles are easy to use and can be a great way to perform spells when just starting out. As you’re picking candles, think of the colors you select and what those colors mean. You might want to do a happiness spell and choose yellow. Maybe you want to attract money, so you choose green. Once you have your color and you know the intent you want it to have, simply light your candle and let that intent come to life.

Never blow out your candles. This cancels or ‘blows out’ your spell/intent. Instead, snuff out your candle. You can use a small cup, saucer, etc. Please be careful when using candles indoors. Stay safe and always keep water nearby.

2. Nature Yep, you heard me. Nature. Acorns, feathers, rocks, sand, pine cones; you name it and it can be used in witchcraft! Each item you find outside has a meaning. For example, acorns carry the attriubtes of money, abundance, luck, and protection. You can carry an acron with you to attract money or luck, perhaps wear it around your neck for protection. So go outside and see what you can find!

3. Salt Salt is a wonderful starter tool. It is used to purify and protect. You can sprinkle it around your doors and windows to keep unwanted energies/spirits out. It can also be used to bless your food when you cook, your baths/showers, etc. When you are casting a circle, you can even use a pinch of salt as a line to draw the circle.

Another reason salt is a beginner tool is it can be used as a substiture cleanser/purifier, especially when you don’t have sage on hand.

4. Quartz This is the substitute for every crystal. Just like how the color white substitutes other candles, quartz can be programmed and used for just about anything and everything. It’s so easy to find as well and is usually very cheap to purchase. On its own, quartz is for manifesting, healing, meditation, protection and channeling. It also comes in a variety of colors, each with their own meaning. For example, rose quartz (pink in color) is used for romance, friendships, and love while smokey quartz (cloudy in color) is used for dissipating emotional and environmental negativity.

Etsy is a great place to find very cheap quartz and even other crystals. Remember, quartz can be found naturally right outside. Take time to find some before you spend money. When you do buy online, always make sure to check reviews and the background of the store/person you are buying from.

Other Tools

Once you get the hang of things and advance your spellwork, there are other tools that can aid better in complex spells/rituals.

1. Athame The Athame is a small dagger or knife that is mainly used symbolically, not physically. It can have an elagant bone handle or be a simple pocket knife you got from your grandfather as a child.

Athames are used for directing energy, such as “cutting” unwanted energetic ties, drawing symbols in the air, etc. It is mainly used for drawing/casting a protective circle. Athames are optional for this use, however, as wands, feathers, etc. can be used for the same purpose.

2. Bells These can be considered starter tools but aren’t necessary when beginning your craft. Bells are used to ‘clear’ the air or dispel negative energies.

Have you ever felt the air was stiff when you walk into a room? That’s when a bell comes in handy. Ring a bell a couple of times throughout a room; the vibrations of the sound helps to clean out anything negative, stale, or unwanted. They are also cheap to find, usually in your local Dollar Tree or Walmart. You can also decorate your bell with ribbons, flowers, crystals, etc.

3. Besom Also known as a broom, a besom is a cermonial tool used to ‘sweep out’ negative energies. Just like how the bell uses vibrations, a besom uses the active motions and movements of you literally sweeping a room clean. Now, when I say sweep, I don’t mean touching the besom to the ground or floow. instead, you’re holding it slightly above the floor, in the air.

Another use for a besom is to hang it above your door to keep bad spirits from entering your home and to keep negative "dirty" energies out.

For me, I simply bought a wooden handled broom and decorated it to be more symbolic. I placed white, purple, and black ribbons around the handle for peace (white), clarity (purple), and to repel negative (black). I also tied quarts crystals towards the end to trap the bad spirits and energies, which I replaced once a week. However, it’s your besom - do with it how you want!

4. Herbs Glorious, glorious herbs! Once you start advancing in your craft, herbs are a fun tool to add to your daily work. You can add them to jars, bottles, pouches, teas, cooking recipes - the possibilities are endless!

You can find them in your kitchen cabinet, in your backyard, and even in your local grocery store below $5! There’s an abundance as well; cinnamon, rosemary, basil, bay, nutmeg, thyme - you name it!

5. Grimoire/Book of Shadows Go to your local store and buy as many notebooks as you can. Notes are essential in witchcraft, whether you’re writing down your references or your latest spell. You can use them as dream journals, tarot journals, write your spells, your rituals - there is nothing you can’t write in them.

Now, there are many more tools that can be used during your witchcraft. These are just the most common and known for most witches to use. However, anything can be a tool - a pencil, piece of paper, paperclip, nail, dirt, tape. If you see an intention within that object, then it can become a tool for your Craft. Don’t be afraid to go out and find what calls to you.

Remember, there are many witches online who are willing to help. Be sure to reach out to them and learn as much as you can.

May the ☀️ guide you through your day and the 🌙 light your way at night. Blessed Be ☽〇☾

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heartofether · 3 years

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Episode 13 - Dog with a Bone TRANSCRIPT

[You can listen to the show wherever you get your podcasts, or go to our “Listen” page if you’re on desktop.]

AUTOMATED VOICE

[INCREASINGLY SLOWLY] Please state your message.

[THEME SONG PLAYS.]

VAL

Three-eyed Frog Presents: The Heart of Ether.

[THEME SONG FADES TO A STOP.]

[PHONE BEEP.]

[INT. AGENTS MAY AND JUNES’ COMPANY VEHICLE, DRIVING INTO DAUGHTLER, WASHINGTON, MIDDAY.]

[THE TWO ARE HEARD DRIVING THROUGH THE TOWN.]

AGENT MAY

This is the audio log of Operation Saturn, phase 1.2. Investigation taking place in Daughtler, Washington, 2019. Set to last for two months minimum. This is day one. Conducted by Agents May and June. All recordings are legal property of the Harper Foundation. Any unauthorized access to these recordings will result in—

AGENT JUNE

[OVERLAPPING] Does Daughtler know no God? That church is crumbling like a communion wafer!

AGENT MAY

Agent June.

AGENT JUNE

I’m just saying! You’d think for a place of worship, they’d take better care of it. Basic maintenance, maybe a new paint job.

AGENT MAY

Well, I guess the people of Daughtler aren’t particularly religious.

AGENT JUNE

Oh, not that I care. I’m an atheist. Raised in a Catholic household, which went about as well as—

AGENT MAY

Look, in the future, could you please avoid speaking over me when we’re recording important information?

AGENT JUNE

What important information? We just got here.

AGENT MAY

Well, if we’re going to be constantly on the record, I would like to maintain some level of professionalism.

AGENT JUNE

Ahh. Hate to break it to you, bud, but if you expect me to shut up for this whole mission, I think you will be greatly disappointed. I am, you see, constantly burdened by great ideas—trust me, it’s exhausting.

AGENT MAY

[SARCASTIC] I’m sure it is.

AGENT JUNE

[AFTER A BRIEF PAUSE, HE SNORTS A LAUGH.] DVD rentals? Dude, who’s renting DVDs in the digital era of pirating—I mean, uh, legally buying and streaming everything online?

AGENT MAY

[DEADPAN] Nice catch.

AGENT JUNE

Anyways, where are we heading first? I’m guessing the motel?

AGENT MAY

Actually, we’re going to make a quick detour. Stop somewhere for a quick interview.

AGENT JUNE

[HE GROANS.] Seriously, dude? We have so much time to do that kind of stuff. Can’t we just, you know, relax for our first day? Settle into Weird Town, USA?

AGENT MAY

I’d like to start this mission off on a good foot. It would be valuable to meet some of the residents, see what they’re like. Besides, this particular individual is important enough that by establishing a relationship early on, it may be beneficial in the long run.

AGENT JUNE

Ugh, fine. Who is our person of the hour, then?

AGENT MAY

Actually, it’s less about the person and more about where they’re living.

[A BEAT.]

AGENT JUNE

Yeah, dude. Obviously. They’re living in Daughtler, Washington. You know, the place we’re investigating?

AGENT MAY

[OVERLAPPING] I mean their house.

Agent June, please, please tell me you know who Bernard Kelly Valencia is.

AGENT JUNE

Obviously, dude! That’s like asking a chemistry student if they know what an electron is. [THEN, UNDER HIS BREATH] Actually, I failed chemistry, so maybe that isn’t the best analogy.

But yeah. Bernard Kelly Valencia. Super weird dude that the entire town was kinda freaked by. Supposedly was well-known among the Ether community for his vast range of research conducted with Dorothy Wood. Nobody actually knows where all that work went after he and Dorothy died, though.

AGENT MAY

Actually, it’s possible some of it was left behind in his own house.

AGENT JUNE

Wait, seriously? Didn’t all of his belongings go to his son afterwards?

AGENT MAY

According to the original house plans, there’s an attic. His son, after leaving the house once and for all, never mentioned there being anything in the attic. This could mean it was just empty, but that fact would have to have been noted at some point. His son was thorough in his complaints about clearing his father’s house, from what we could find. It’s possible nobody ever even bothered to look up there.

AGENT JUNE

So you think he had something in his attic that just never got found?

AGENT MAY

That’s what the Foundation believes.

AGENT JUNE

Alrighty, then. That’s not too bad. We just break into a dead guy’s house and pillage through his attic. I mean, how hard can that be?

AGENT MAY

It’s not that simple. There’s a new tenant living there.

AGENT JUNE

Ahh, I see. Do you think they know?

AGENT MAY

Perhaps. There was a recent missing person report linked to the house—an inspector who the landlord sent out to investigate a supposed mold problem.

AGENT JUNE

Classic.

AGENT MAY

Which leads us to believe that the new tenant is at least familiar with Ether—assuming the mold problem was of supernatural origin, which is probable due to the house’s location and the report filed by the landlord describing the mold: yellow, with an odd scent.

AGENT JUNE

So, what’s our plan? Are we just going to go and ask to search the house?

AGENT MAY

Unfortunately, the Foundation couldn’t acquire a formal search warrant. We’ll have to convince the new tenant to let us in of their own free will.

AGENT JUNE

Who is this person, anyways?

AGENT MAY

Her name is Irene Gray. She’s twenty-one years old. Works as forestry aid.

AGENT JUNE

Do we know anything else about her?

AGENT MAY

Let’s just say the mold inspector isn’t the only missing persons case she’s connected to. Four years ago, an 18-year-old girl named Rosemary Quinn went missing. Officials think it’s likely she ran away. Irene Gray was Rosemary’s girlfriend. The police’s interview with Irene states that the two of them had planned on running away together not long after the date Rosemary had gone missing.

AGENT JUNE

Way to rat your girlfriend out like that.

AGENT MAY

She could have been desperate for any sort of lead, even if that meant getting herself and Rosemary in trouble. And she did get in trouble, I believe, though not with the law, per say. Irene couldn’t have known where Rosemary had gone, though. She was so emotionally devastated after the event, there was little chance she was faking it or lying to cover for Rosemary. She actually started therapy not long after.

AGENT JUNE

So, why does it matter? Did they ever find Rosemary?

AGENT MAY

Unfortunately, no. The official record states that the last place she was potentially seen was a local animal shelter, where she dropped off her cat, whose name she said was Sage. This, however, does not sync up with reports from her family claiming the cat’s name was Sir Griffin the Third, which led to some uncertainty. They had a difficult time tracking her after that, though. All they had to go off of was one potential gas station siting, but all that resulted in was another dead end.

AGENT JUNE

Uh, you still haven’t explained why any of this matters.

AGENT MAY

[FRUSTRATED] Could you just be patient for one— [HE HUFFS A SIGH.]

Look, it’s important because it’s unlikely Irene Gray will let us explore her house if we just ask nicely.

AGENT JUNE

So, we have to use bait?

AGENT MAY

It could be a mutually beneficial relationship, is what I’m saying. We both have something the other wants.

AGENT JUNE

Wait, does the Foundation, like, know what happened to that girl?

AGENT MAY

Not quite, but, potentially. I’ll show you what we have once we stop the car.

AGENT JUNE

Great! This should be interesting.

AGENT MAY

[UNDER HIS BREATH] I’m sure it will be.

[PHONE BEEP.]

[RECORDING ENDS.]

[INT. IRENE GRAY’S HOUSE, MIDDAY.]

[IRENE IS ON A PHONE CALL WITH ADEN. ON HIS END OF THE LINE, THERE IS THE LOOPING SOUND OF A BROKEN FAX MACHINE ATTEMPTING, BUT FAILING, TO PROCESS PAPER.]

IRENE

It’s a fax machine. How do you not know how to use a fax machine? I’ve literally watched you do it before.

ADEN

Well, I thought I knew! And I mean, come on, how come you get to judge me when you can’t even use your phone properly?

IRENE

Oh, my god—Aden, it’s my day off. Can’t you just look it up?

ADEN

I don’t know how to describe the problem in a way a search engine will understand. It’s too—you know—specific.

IRENE

Ask someone there, then. Carol and Julia probably know better than I do.

ADEN

Julia’s sick, and Carol’s on some important phone call. Look, I just—if we have to replace this thing and it’s my fault, I’m going to freak out—

IRENE

Okay, wait until Carol gets off the phone and then—

ADEN

[WORRIED] What if it sets on fire or something?

IRENE

[FRUSTRATED] It won’t! It’s probably just jammed.

ADEN

But what if it does?

IRENE

[SNAPPING] Jeez, dude, just go find the manual! Why are you calling me?

ADEN

[PANICKED, STUTTERING] Because I’m panicking, alright? Look, ever, ever since the mold incident, I’ve been so scared constantly of everything. Every tiny thing that happens feels like it’s the end of the world, especially because that dude’s van went missing and it’s like you guys are just constantly waiting for the police to just show up at your door—

IRENE

[HER TONE SOFTENS, GROWING SYMPATHETIC] Oh, Aden—

ADEN

[CONT.] —and you and Carol almost died, and I did nothing. Okay? I sat in my office and talked to the knitted cat on my desk while I had a panic attack and did nothing.

I just want to find some way to, to do good, to fix something, but instead I think I ruined the fax machine and now I’m just failing you and Carol, again.

IRENE

[CHOOSING HER WORDS CAREFULLY] Hey. Look, I—I’m sorry I snapped. It’s not…it’s not that big of a deal.

ADEN

[COMING DOWN, GUILTILY] No, no, you’re right. I shouldn’t have called you on your day off.

IRENE

It’s fine. Seriously, don’t worry about it. Do you need me to go down there and look at it?

ADEN

No, don’t. I’m kinda starting to calm down, and I think if I can’t find the manual, I’ll just wait until Carol gets off the phone.

IRENE

That’s a good idea.

[A BEAT.] Um, if you need a distraction or anything, we can still talk for a bit. I know how anxiety can be.

ADEN

[SINCERE] That means a lot, Irene. Thank you.

IRENE

Of course.

Is there anything in particular you want to talk about?

ADEN

[A BEAT, THEN, HESITANT] I actually have a question. I’ve been thinking about it for a bit, but if it’s too personal, you don’t have to answer.

IRENE

I mean, I think you’ve already seen me at some pretty low points, so…

ADEN

[HE CHUCKLES.] Alright.

[CAREFULLY] You said you had a girlfriend who went missing.

IRENE

[A BEAT.] Yup.

ADEN

What was her name?

IRENE

[A HESITANT BEAT.] Rose. Er, you may have seen the name Rosemary Quinn at some point, but it was years ago.

ADEN

Yeah, I don’t remember. Sorry.

IRENE

It’s fine.

ADEN

What happened to her?

[THERE’S A PAUSE.]

IRENE

[GRIM] We never found out.

For a long time, I’ve thought that she just decided she was sick of her life as it was. Ran away to start a new one without telling anyone where she went. It would have made sense—she had planned on doing it for a while. Even took cash from her savings out in chunks so nobody would be able to track her card when she did. Her mother simply wrote this off as poorly thought-out impulse purchases.

We had planned our entire future together, though, and for her to just throw it out didn’t make sense, it—well… [SHE TRAILS OFF.]

ADEN

I’m sorry.

IRENE

I thought it was her mom at first, though. Grace Quinn. [SHE SAYS THE NAME WITH VENOM.]

They investigated Grace for domestic abuse. Believed Rose ran away to escape a dangerous situation. Upon Rose not answering her bedroom door, Grace, well…broke it down. Rose had locked it before she went out the window, and her mother just—decimated the doorknob to get in. At least, that’s what the police report says.

ADEN

Jeez.

IRENE

Without the child there, however, it was difficult to prove any abuse. I had some texts. Her aunts had a couple of anecdotes. That was all, though. Grace refused to admit to anything, of course.

ADEN

[HESITANT] Was there? Um, was there abuse?

IRENE

[A BEAT.] Yeah.

ADEN

I’m so sorry.

IRENE

It was rarely ever physical, but it definitely happened.

ADEN

I mean, if Rose was trying to escape something, I hope she was safe in the end.

IRENE

[PAUSE, THEN, SOFTLY, ALMOST SAD] I do, too.

[A BEAT.] That wasn’t all, though. Grace acted really strange afterwards. When police asked what had happened the night before, she said she couldn’t remember. Seriously, she didn’t have any concrete details. She said she had just woken up that morning and Rose was gone, but her story kept changing in little ways. It was disorienting.

She seemed…paranoid. Jumpy. Confused, even. Angry, but her anger wasn’t directed anywhere. I might have felt bad for her if just the thought of her hadn’t made my blood boil. I mean, I imagine your daughter going missing has gotta have some sort of effect on you, even if you’re not on good terms with her.

Grace wasn’t entirely there, though. Looking back, it’s a lot more clear. I…know some things, I didn’t know back then. I just, I wonder what was really wrong with her. I haven’t talked to her in years. Certainly not about to start now.

ADEN

I mean, I kinda sympathize with her, but also, she doesn’t sound like a great person.

IRENE

Oh no, she’s horrible. I know I should feel some remorse for all the awful things I’ve said about her, but I don’t. Not really.

When Rose first went missing, I became blinded by rage. I screamed at Grace when I saw her. Cursed in her face. Said it was all her fault, because I was—well, I was scared, and I had no other explanation. My dad had to drag me away before I attacked her.

ADEN

Jeez, Irene.

IRENE

I’m obviously better about my anger management now. Therapy at least did that for me.

ADEN

I mean, I get it. I can’t imagine how hard that must have been for you.

IRENE

Yeah. Um, yeah. [IT SOUNDS LIKE THERE’S SOMETHING ELSE SHE WANTS TO SAY.]

Thanks, Aden.

ADEN

Of course. If you…I mean, I know it’s been a while, but you can always talk to me about it. I’ve said that before, but, y’know.

IRENE

I appreciate it.

[A PAUSE.]

ADEN

I think Carol’s call ended.

IRENE

[TEASING] And did the fax machine catch on fire?

ADEN

[HE LAUGHS.] No. No, it did not.

[IRENE LAUGHS. ANOTHER PAUSE.]

IRENE

[MORE SERIOUS] Aden?

ADEN

Yeah?

IRENE

I’m…I’m working on something. It’s a personal project.

ADEN

[CAUGHT OFF GUARD] Oh. Okay.

IRENE

I don’t think I can tell you what it’s about, but…just so you know. I mean, I trust you, so.

ADEN

That’s—um, that’s fine. Uh, let me know if I can help at all?

IRENE

Sure. I’ll talk to you later.

[AS THEY SPEAK, THERE’S APPROACHING FOOTSTEPS ON ADEN’S END OF THE LINE.]

ADEN

You, too. Thank you again for talking.

IRENE

Not a problem. Bye.

ADEN

Talk to you soon!

CAROL

[IN THE DISTANCE] What did you do to the damn—?

[PHONE BEEP AS ADEN HANGS UP. IRENE SIGHS.]

IRENE

[CONFUSED] Oh, uh. Didn’t realize my phone was recording. [MUTTERS] When did that start? Guess I turned it on at some point.

[A BEAT.] Well, Rose. I’m talking to you now. Not just some figment of you in my head, but, you.

I know you’re going to hear these. I don’t know when, but you will. Of course you will.

[A BEAT.] Only problem is, I’m kind of at a dead end. My only lead so far is a mysterious recording that popped up on my laptop with no explanation. I have no idea how any of those files got there. Do I just have to wait until whatever weird force that gives them to me decides to throw one my way?

It’s like gambling at that point. I don’t know when I’ll get something or if what I find will be helpful or not. I mean, hell, I could get a new file on my computer and it’ll just be some voicemail I sent you sophomore year about baking brownies. Who knows what I’ll find or when I’ll find it?

I have to figure out something more reliable. Maybe figure out where the recordings are coming from, and if I can use whatever it is to my advantage. Or, I don’t know, Phoebe is coming over at some point to look in my attic. Maybe I should just—

[THERE’S A KNOCK AT THE FRONT DOOR.]

IRENE

…huh. Wasn’t expecting anyone.

[IRENE IS HEARD GETTING UP AND WALKING TOWARDS THE DOOR. AS SHE APPROACHES, THE AGENT'S MUFFLED ARGUING IS HEARD, GROWING LOUDER AS SHE GROWS NEAR.]

AGENT JUNE

[MUFFLED] I'm just saying, it could be pretty cool, you know? I'm all like, "Ooh, ahh, no, tell us what we wanna know, and you're like—"

AGENT MAY

[MUFFLED, OVERLAPPING ] June, you're too impressionable by all of these movies that you watch.

[IRENE OPENS THE DOOR, BUT THEY CONTINUE AS IF SHE ISN'T THERE.]

AGENT JUNE

[CONT.] No, no, listen. It could be great, it could be great! We could like, stand back to back, and like, ooh, finger guns—

AGENT MAY

No, I'm not doing finger guns!

IRENE

[OVERLAPPING] Um, can I help you?

AGENT JUNE

[TO AGENT MAY] Okay, but just try it—

AGENT MAY

[HARSHLY CUTTING HIM OFF.] Yes, actually. Is this the residence of Irene Gray?

IRENE

[SKEPTICAL] Who’s asking?

[AGENT MAY IS HEARD FLASHING HIS BADGE.]

AGENT MAY

We’re Agents May and June of The Harper Foundation. We’d like to ask you a few questions, if you don’t mind.

IRENE

The hell is that?

AGENT JUNE

Ah, see, that’s the point: you’re not supposed to know. [A BEAT.] I mean, well, we do leave kind of cryptic ads in the local paper sometimes, but, still.

AGENT MAY

[UNDER HIS BREATH] Agent June.

AGENT JUNE

What? I don’t choose to put those weird ads there!

IRENE

[UNIMPRESSED] …so, what, you’re secret agents?

AGENT MAY

If you’d like to call us that. May we come in?

IRENE

Why?

AGENT MAY

We just need to ask you about a few things. I promise it won’t be long.

IRENE

…are you going to, what, search my house?

AGENT JUNE

You got something to hide?

IRENE

[DEFENSIVE] No! I’m sorry that I value my privacy.

AGENT MAY

We’re not searching your house right now. This will be much easier for all of us if you comply, Ms. Gray.

IRENE

[SHE THINKS FOR A MOMENT, THEN, DISGRUNTLED] Fine.

AGENT MAY

Thank you.

[IRENE IS HEARD LEADING THE AGENTS INTO HER HOUSE, CLOSING THE DOOR BEHIND THEM. THEIR FOOTSTEPS ARE HEARD AS THEY ENTER.]

AGENT JUNE

It’s a nice place you got here. Oh, wow, did you paint that yourself?

IRENE

It was a gift.

AGENT JUNE

Ah, gotcha, gotcha.

[THERE’S A PAUSE AS THEY STOP WALKING.]

IRENE

Well? Take a seat. Be my guest.

[AGENTS MAY AND JUNE ARE HEARD SITTING AT THE TABLE. THERE ARE TWO LOUD THUNKING NOISES, AS IF SOMEONE IS HITTING THE TABLE.]

AGENT MAY

Agent June, take your feet off the table.

AGENT JUNE

Sorry, sorry.

[SHUFFLING NOISES AS AGENT JUNE MOVES HIS FEET.]

IRENE

Can I get you both anything to drink?

AGENT JUNE

There are your manners!

AGENT MAY

[UNDER HIS BREATH] You’re one to talk.

AGENT JUNE

Whatcha got?

IRENE

Um, water? I could make coffee? I also have lemonade in the fridge, but that’s for emergencies.

[A PAUSE.]

AGENT JUNE

I think I’m in the mood for an emergency lemonade. You, Agent May?

AGENT MAY

I’m fine, thanks.

[AS THEY CONTINUE THE CONVERSATION, IRENE IS HEARD GRABBING THE LEMONADE OUT OF THE FRIDGE, TAKING A GLASS FROM THE CUPBOARD, AND POURING JUNE'S DRINK.]

AGENT MAY

How long have you lived here, Ms. Gray?

IRENE

Not long. I moved here for work.

AGENT MAY

And what do you do?

IRENE

[HASTILY] I’m an engineer.

AGENT JUNE

Mm! Enjoying the area so far?

IRENE

It’s nice. The people are friendly.

[SHE SETS AGENT JUNE’S LEMONADE DOWN ON THE TABLE.]

AGENT JUNE

Much obliged.

[HE TAKES A DRINK LOUDLY. IRENE SITS DOWN ACROSS FROM THE TWO OF THEM.]

IRENE

…well? You said you had questions.

AGENT MAY

We’re here to ask you about a missing person.

[A TENSE PAUSE.]

IRENE

Which one?

AGENT MAY

Which one are you thinking of?

IRENE

[SHE PAUSES.] Are you talking about Rosemary Quinn?

AGENT MAY

[A TENTATIVE PAUSE.] You and Rosemary were close, correct?

IRENE

Why do you care?

AGENT MAY

I’m asking a question. An answer would be nice.

IRENE

[HESITANT] I knew Rose, yeah.

AGENT MAY

When was the last time you saw her?

IRENE

Um, it was two days before her disappearance, I believe?

Look, this should all be on her file. I don’t see the need to recount this all to you unless they’ve opened the case again. Hell, you’re not even cops, are you?

AGENT JUNE

Oh, don’t be that way, Irene. I know this case isn’t as recent as the other one you’re involved with, but you should be able to remember, right?

IRENE

The—

[THERE'S A LOW, EERIE INSTRUMENTAL AS IRENE'S BLOOD RUNS COLD.]

IRENE

[BLUFFING] What other case?

[AGENT MAY SLIDES A PIECE OF PAPER ACROSS THE TABLE.]

AGENT MAY

You were the last person to see this man, correct?

IRENE

I, um, I don’t know him, no.

AGENT JUNE

You’re not as good at lying as you think you are, you know.

[HE'S HEARD FLIPPING OVER A PIECE OF PAPER TO EXAMINE IT.]

AGENT JUNE

[CONT.] I mean, why lie to us about your job, anyways? There’s no shame in being a forestry aid. I’m sure it’s a lovely profession.

IRENE

Who the hell are you people?

AGENT MAY

Relax, Irene. The Harper Foundation has already taken care of his vehicle and rerouted the case so it doesn’t trace back to you. Investigators will come up with a dead-end soon enough, and nobody will know what you did.

AGENT JUNE

You’re welcome for that.

IRENE

I— [THEN, GUILTILY] I didn’t kill him.

AGENT MAY

I’m sure you didn’t. That’s not important right now. We’re just trying to give you a nudge in the right direction so maybe then you’ll be inclined to tell us the truth.

IRENE

Why? What do you want from me?

AGENT MAY

If you’d give me a moment to speak, then I can explain.

[IRENE HUFFS A SIGH, BUT LETS AGENT MAY SPEAK. HE FLIPS OPEN A FOLDER.]

AGENT MAY

Are you aware of this house’s previous tenant?

IRENE

You mean Bernard Kelly Valencia? His reputation precedes him, but I never knew the guy.

AGENT MAY

That’s correct. We believe he left something behind after he died, however. Something that could be incredibly beneficial for the Foundation. Have you found anything like that?

[IRENE STAYS SILENT.]

AGENT JUNE

[WHISPERS TO AGENT MAY] I think she’s trying to plead the fifth.

AGENT MAY

We expected such stubbornness. We’re not asking you for this for free, you know. We believe we may also have something that would be beneficial for you.

IRENE

And, what is that, exactly?

AGENT MAY

I’m glad you asked.

[HE'S HEARD HANDING A PAPER TO IRENE. MYSTERIOUS MUSIC BEGINS PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND.]

AGENT MAY

Sometime in July, the same year Rosemary Quinn disappeared, a dusty yellow bicycle was found in the middle of nowhere in Oregon. It appeared to have had a broken piece in the front where a basket was supposed to be attached. It was never brought to the police, so unfortunately, it could never be examined as possible evidence.

AGENT JUNE

Hiker who found it posted about it on Twitter, though. The guy didn’t have many followers, so it never got traction.

AGENT MAY

This photo was taken not too far from Bent. If this is Rosemary’s bicycle, it could mean that we have a possible travel path for her after her disappearance.

[A TENSE PAUSE.]

AGENT JUNE

Oh, that was quite the shift in your expression, Irene. Have we struck a nerve? [MELODRAMATIC] I guess young love tends to leave such sore, open wounds, doesn’t it?

AGENT MAY

If you let us look at whatever it is Mr. Valencia left behind, we can help you find Rosemary Quinn. It may take some time, but we believe we can determine what happened to her. We just need your help.

[THE MUSIC STOPS. THERE'S A LONG PAUSE.]

IRENE

Get out.

[SHE'S HEARD GETTING OUT OF HER CHAIR.]

AGENT JUNE

Wh—hey!

IRENE

[GROWING MORE UPSET] Get out, I said. Get out!

[AS SHE SPEAKS, SHE'S HEARD PHYSICALLY GRABBING THE AGENTS AND PUSHING THEM OUT OF HER HOUSE. WHILE SHE'S AT IT, SHE GRABS THEIR FOLDERS AS WELL, THOUGH ONE PAPER STAYS BEHIND.]

AGENT JUNE

Hey, no, stop! You can't just grab our things like that! Please.

AGENT MAY

[OVERLAPPING, STUTTERING] Hey—!

[BOTH AGENTS STUMBLE OUTSIDE. IRENE IS HEARD THROWING THEIR PAPERS OUT THE DOOR.]

AGENT JUNE

Woah!

AGENT MAY

That's confidential information, you can't keep that in your house—

[SHE CUTS HIM OFF BY SLAMMING THE DOOR. THERE'S A PAUSE AS SHE BEGINS PACING THE FLOOR.]

IRENE

Who the hell do they think they are? Do they think I’m just some sort of—some sort of tool for them to use? Do they think they can dangle Rose over my head like I’m a dog with a bone, all over some—

[SHE PICKS THE PICTURE UP OFF THE TABLE, STOPPING HER PACING]

IRENE

Some picture of a bicycle?

[THERE’S A PAUSE AS IRENE STARES AT THE PHOTO, BEGINNING TO CALM DOWN.]

IRENE

[CAUTIOUS HOPE.] Is this really your bike, Rose? Why would you tear the basket off? You loved that basket. [WANDERING INTO DAYDREAM TERRITORY] You’d put flowers I got you in it and then ride around your block. Said it made you feel like you were in a painting.

[A BEAT.] Maybe I shouldn’t have kicked them—

[THERE’S ANOTHER KNOCK AT THE DOOR. IRENE STORMS BACK OVER TO IT.]

IRENE

[YELLING] I told you to get out! I’m not some stupid—

[SHE OPENS THE DOOR, AND REALIZES IT'S NOT THE AGENTS.]

IRENE

[EMBARRASSED] …dog.

TEEN

Well, I sure hope you’re not.

IRENE

[AWKWARDLY] Um, hi. Sorry, it’s just, someone else was just over and—

TEEN

Those two dudes? Yeah, they didn’t look very happy. That one guy, the one who had his tie undone for some reason, he had to chase one of the papers down the street. It was really funny.

IRENE

You were watching?

TEEN

Well, I didn’t realize you had a line going out your door of people waiting to talk to you.

IRENE

[DEADPAN] I’m new to the famous life.

TEEN

You’ll get used to it, I’m sure.

IRENE

Well, are you here to interview me and talk about my darkest secrets?

TEEN

That would be cool, wouldn’t it?

IRENE

[DISGRUNTLED] Not after the day I’ve had.

TEEN

Well, you see, I’ve actually been dying to meet you. My mom told me about you, said she met you at the store. I don’t know if you remember her, but from what she told me, it sounds like maybe you could use a bit of help.

IRENE

Your m— [IN SHOCKED AWE] Oh my god, are you the meat lady’s kid?

AVERY

Actually, my name is Avery.

Wanna grab lunch sometime?

[PHONE BEEP.]

[RECORDING ENDS.]

AUTOMATED VOICE

Today's quote is: "Most of the people are homesick anyway, and a little lonely, and they hide themselves in their hair and are turned into flowers."

Tove Jansson in Sculptor's Daughter, 1968.

[A PAUSE AS A HOLLOW NOISE BEGINS TO GROW IN THE BACKGROUND, FOLLOWED BY STATIC.]

AUTOMATED VOICE

[SLOWLY, AS IF STRAINED] Sometimes, when I close my eyes, I can feel it—

[THE VOICE IS CUT OFF BY STATIC.]

[OUTRO MUSIC & CREDITS PLAY.]

[AN EXTENDED PIANO VERSION OF THE NIGHT POST’S OPENING THEME PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND.]

NIGHT POST PROMO

Hello there, citizen. You’ve lived in Gilt City for a while now. Maybe you’ve wondered, when you wake in the morning and retrieve the letters tucked neatly into your postbox, just where your mail comes from. It comes from the Night Post, of course. Those faithful couriers deliver it while you’re sleeping--all the better that they stay out of sight, and keep the unseemly strangeness that follows them out of our city, in the Skelter, where it belongs.

Ahem. If, for some reason, you’d like to know more about Gilt City’s conscripted couriers and the burden that chose them, their secret hopes and fears, the ancient, untamed threats that hound them on their nocturnal journeys--you have only to listen. The Night Post is a supernatural audio drama by an all-LGBT team, delivered weekly, in dead of night, to wherever you listen to podcasts.

Find answers at nightpostpod.com.

#heart of ether transcripts

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dialovers-translations · 4 years

Text

Diabolik Lovers GRAND EDITION for Switch ;; More, Blood ー Kanato Dark [Prologue]

Monologue

ーー I cannot seem to recall,

where exactly I learnt that.

I wonder since when,

but without realizing, I hum this song.

Only when I am singing,

I feel as if I have been liberated from something.

I am not quite sure what exactly is tying me down,

but strangely enough, I felt that way.

They say that various desires have been put into a song.

A song about a prayer.

A song about sharing the pain.

And, my song isーー

ー The scene starts with a flashback of a young Kanato on the balcony

Kanato: Are you going to Scarborough Fair...

Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme...

???: ...Fufu...

Kanato: ...

???: That tickles~ Please stop. Fufu...

???: When you make those kind of sounds, it is almost as if you are begging me to continue.

???: Oh dear~ Aren’t you the one who does not want to stop?

???: Yes. If I could, right here, right now, I would love to ーー

???: Nn...Fufu...

Kanato: ...

Cordelia: ...Oh my, Kanato? What are you doing? Please sing more.

Your singing voice is a perfect fit on nights like these.

Besides...When I hear it, I feel exhilarated. It makes me enjoy the night all the more.

Richter: Cordelia, let us put the song aside for now. Come on, scoot closer.

Cordelia: Fufu...

Kanato: ...Okay, Mother.

Are you going to Scarborough Fair...

Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme...

..Fufu.

ー The flashback ends as the scene shifts to Kanato’s room

Kanato: Remember me to one who lives there...

Yui: ( Kanato-kun has such a beautiful singing voice. I can’t help but get enchanted by it. )

Kanato: She was once a ーー ...

...Why have you been intently staring at my face this whole time, if I may ask?

You truly are a rude person.

Yui: S-Sorry...

Kanato: If you are going to apologize, I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t do such things to begin with.

Besides, even if you say sorry now, it doesn’t change the fact that you made me very uncomfortable.

Say, how will you make it up to me, Yui-san?

Yui: Even if you say that...

ー He steps closer

Kanato: Fufu...That shouldn’t even be a question (1), as there is only one thing you are capable of doing, right?

Come on...Please offer me your blood.

No, ...asking you to offer it might be a little odd.

After all, your blood has been mine all along.

Yui: Waiーー

Kanato: I won’t waitーー

ー Kanato bites her

Yui: Ah...

Kanato: Nn...

...

*Sluuuuurp*

...Haah.

That being said...

When it is this easy to obtain, it isn’t very interesting...

Yui-san, were you hoping to bore me?

Please resist a little in an attempt to entertain me.

Fufu...Well, no matter how much you struggle, I won’t let you get awayーー

...

ー He continues sucking her blood

Yui: Sto...

Kanato: Do you want me to stop? Really? Fufu...

Well, if you insist...

You’ll have to push me aside and use your own strength to run away.

If you can’t do that...You have no other choice but to keep quiet and have your blood sucked. You are a powerless being after all.

Fufu...!

Yui: Ah...!

( No good, I can’t fight back. )

Kanato: ...Nn...

I get irritated just from looking at your face...

If it were not for this blood of yours, I probably would not hesitate to kill you on the spot...

...!

Yui: ( I wonder why Kanato-kun is so mad...? )

( I don’t understand... )

Monologue

Kanato-kun is surprisingly powerful,

continuing to suck my blood as he pinned me down.

In his eyes,

I can’t see anything but rage.

If I let my guard down for even a split second,

I feel as if I will be pulled into the abyss,

known as Kanato-kun’s emotions.

Whoever, or whatever,

caused this look in his eyes,

I do not know.

I could only allow Kanato-kun,

to continue draining this blood of mine,

flowing through my entire body.

ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー

Translation notes

(1) He says どうするもこうするも or ‘dou suru mo, kou suru mo’ in Japanese which literally means ‘whether you do this or that’ and is used when the answer to a certain question should be obvious, or when there is no real question to be asked in the first place.

<- [ Kanato prologue ] [ Dark 01 ] ->

→ LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!

#diabolik lovers #dialovers #kanato sakamaki #more blood #diabolik lovers translation #mbkanatodarkprolog

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spiltscribbles · 3 years

Note

Hey love =) 1, 7, 24, 32 and 41 pretty please? If these are too many, just pick some =)

ANNE!!!! BABY!!!! I MISS YOU!!!!! Why haven’t we talked in a century and a half????? I know I haven’t been on the writing server in a hot minute but I still miss you damn it!!! XS Thank you so much for the ask darling!!!! You’re an angel!!!!

if you were to have Hanahaki disease, what flowers would you cough up?

I literally only recently found out what this trope is lkasgjlksdfhiodslkjg And JFC it’s tragic!!! But idk, my gut is just to talk about my favorite flowers which are pink roses, yellow calla lilies and white peonies, I’m not quite sure what all the meanings are though, but obligatory reference to the flowers growing outside my parents house in Palestine which smelt like the most beautiful thing in the world and I only heard the arabic word for them so idk, but those would def be there bahahaha

7. scythe, battle axe, broad sword, spear or trident?

Spear purely for the sex appeal tbh, but I’m also soft so like how am I suppose to use this kladsjglkasdhgioaewjgs

24. mint, rosemary, basil or sage?

Oh sage hands down for dim healing properties babey!!! I be keeping that in lock!!!

32. what would you end up in the dungeon for?

Okay!!! Okay!!! I scream laughed over this j becs there’s a channel in my server for this that I send folks when they’re being insolent (It’s totally a joke and everyone invovlved knows it and I’m just a chaotic Mod LMFAO) but it’s called the gallows, and I obvi can’t be sent there, but I’m told I should be sent there only because I’m either being to chaotic or horny on main…. We’re a very messy bunch, ya’ll should totally join us hahahahaha it’s like ten percent about RWRB and the rest is us being the world’s most tragic family bahaha

41. stained glass windows or fairy lights?

FAIRY LIGHTS!!! FAIRY FUCKING LIGHTS!!!! My reception/wedding will be outdoors and it will be like so late by the time it ends, and during dusk I want just the entire area sparkling in fairy lights and I’ll be wearing my second dress that’s meant for partying okrrrrrr

These were so much fun!!!! I love you endlessly baby!!!!!! Thank you!!!

~Ask Me A Romantically Tragic Question??

#letters #sweet peeps #💜Anne💜

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inevitablesurrender · 3 years

Text

It was a day for plant pictures, I guess. ...I’d already been taking the rest of the week easy, why make extra effort in anything today.

Oh we will have a good crop of fuck you flowers this year.

As for the seedlings, two dahlias do seem to be surviving! ...And that’s it. All the blue crab plants are more than thriving and that is still really unexpected, along with the lupine at the very very bottom doing just fine. .........None of the primrose survived. The middle is bare. Open for something else, I suppose, but I’ll hold off for now and see how the rest grows this year.

The other side of the bed with dahlia patches... not too noticeably barren. I haven’t decided if I want to expand the bed or leave some grass between this and the next one yet, but either way no border as of now.

And now for indoor downstairs plants because the sun coming in looked nice.

The key lime tree said “Hey, wanna see a trick? *EXPLODES WITH NEW GROWTH*“ Yeah this is gonna need that bigger pot sooner rather than later. So I bought more citrus/cactus potting mix.

The meyer lemon tree similarly desperately needs to be moved to the bigger pot but That Fucking Lemon is Still There. I mean, I’m not actually complaining, but moving it is. Going to be a thing, alright.

Behind the lemon are sage, the avocado sprout (wait for it) and the housemate’s gerbera daisy that I quite literally snatched back from the jaws of death. It’s doing really well now and that makes me afraid to put it in a more size-appropriate pot.

This tiny tall avocado bastard was very sudden and is still very much extending upward. Here’s hoping it lets go of the seed/shell soon so I can pull that out before it goes black and gross.

Behind all that are some covered seeds and seedlings, butterfly bush and a random assortment of seeds that looked like they may just be splitting open, and three little hibiscus sprouts on the far right. Left-middle is a brand new butternut squash sprout, and two jalapenos in the middle that are just chilling with no apparent desire to grow quickly at all, nope. Nope.

On the window behind the lime tree we have a smattering of other hibiscus seedlings in various stages of development. ...I want flowering hedges, so I’m growing my own.

On the left are brand new dahlia sprouts. Growing way faster than I expected, so good. And the little nondescript pepper plant on the right with one fruit. Because the other flower just fell off. Well that’s fine seeing as how it’s tiny and all.

Taking up a window in the other room are oregano on the left and peppermint on the right. Hoping to get the peppermint moved outside to expand and serve as a bit of pest protection as soon as the weather stops pissing the plants off.

And finally, the ones I call “the survivors”. The only seeds that sprouted in the dozen I planted: thyme on the left, rosemary in the middle, and chive on the right. So, well, fine. I will plant more eventually but for now let’s see how this goes.

#yammering #yammering with pictures #PLANTS

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jonnyblackwrites · 4 years

Text

Desert Rose Metaphysical: Incense, Tarot, and Crystals!

A story about a skeptical cashier who just wants to eat her lunch and a delivery person who claims to have lost their head, with a dash of magic and some ASL!

Genre: Fantasy, Word Count: 1,571. Enjoy Reading!

“Okay, so I have three sage bundles, 2 packs of palo santo, and a seven day candle. 15.37,” Mara told the blue haired teen. She paid with card and left, leaving the store empty save for Mara. Her customer service smile quickly disappeared, replaced by a yawn. Finally, she was alone, blessedly alone for 45 minutes. Enough time to scroll through her apps a bit before ordering lunch.

All the witches these days had colorful hair. This month’s trend seemed to be some variation of blue. She wondered what platform it was they gathered on, how they decided what color to dye their hair that week. Every time she searched “witch”, “witchcraft”, “spells” on Instagram or Facebook, she never saw a customer she recognized. How many witches in one city could there be? She desperately wanted to find whatever subreddit it was they all posted on.

She took a large breath, breathing in all the smells that culminated in the shop, filled her lungs with the aroma. She loved the smell of incense burning, loved that she came home with the soft smoke of it wafting off of her. But magic? Spells? Maaaybe she could get behind energy and vibrations in rose quartz crystal, but chanting to the air or the moon wasn’t going to pay the bills, or make someone love you more, or help your rheumatoid arthritis. Then again, she believed in a floating man up in the sky, so who was she to judge, really?

Mara’s thumb wandered over the FoodPals app, and she ended up ordering a Teryaki bowl, even though she had perfectly good leftovers in the backroom. She flipped the sign on the door and locked it. With not much else to do she walked around, tidying up bottles of rosemary oil, making sure the malachite and jade hadn’t been mixed up again in the rock box. It was never really untidy in here— business was alright, but it was February. Only candles were flying off the shelves, probably for all the love ritual baths that everyone was taking. The shop saw a lot of Aphrodite patrons this month.

The tea section was her second favorite, after the incense and oils. Last payday she treated herself to the “DREAMER” tea, made with mugwort and chamomile and a host of fancy herbs she’d never had in tea before. Just a little treat- it was one of the more expensive products in the store, and the little voice in her head was singing treat yourself. Supposedly, it would help the drinker sleep. She did feel tired while sipping it, but it was mainly chamomile. A simple cup of tea wasn’t enough to convince her yet.

She had her nose in a loose leaf tin labeled “HEART MENDER” when a knock on the glass spooked her. Oh right, her delivery. She opened to door and came face to face with a bright purple motorcycle helmet. The person wearing it held up a white take out bag.

“Oh, you’re from FoodPals?” Mara asked.

The helmet nodded. In the other hand, they held a portable credit card terminal. They lightly nudged it towards Mara. Oh, that’s right. She didn’t want to pay on the app.

“Oh, yeah. Sorry— I left my card in the back. Come on in, I’ll go get it,” she said.

The helmet looked around, but said nothing.

“Can you see under there? You can take your helmet off, if you want.”

But they just shook their head and Mara began to wonder if locking herself in with a delivery person, a stranger, wasn’t a great idea. It was probably, fine right? All they were holding was the bag and terminal.

The helmet seemed to be staring at Mara’s chest. They set the bag and terminal on the counter, and pointed to her pin that read I know ASL. How Can I Help?

“You know ASL?” they asked in sign.

Oh! That was a relief. “Yes,” she signed back, “I do. Is this better?”

“I can hear you,” they said, and Mara saw that their nails were also bright purple. Matchy matchy. “But I have to sign. Go ahead and get your card, now that I’m here, I have a question?” Mara assumed this was the correct inflection— the delivery person seemed to be substituting a tilt of the head for the usual raised eyebrows that indicated a “questioning” tone. “If you don’t mind answering on your lunch. I’d really appreciate it.”

“Sure,” she shrugged, answering back with her voice. She didn’t really want to be working on her lunch, but if it was just one question… this person couldn’t linger long. It looked like they had more deliveries on the back of their bike. Mara came back quickly with her card, swiped for her meal, and dug in behind the counter, opening up each styrofoam tub with a little sigh. It smelled delicious. She took a large gulp of her coke before giving her attention back to the delivery person.

“So,” she said between bites, “What’s your question? Actually, can I ask why you won’t take off your helmet? I’d be able to understand you a little better if I could see your face.”

“I want to,” they said, “but I can’t. I got cursed by a witch. My head is lost somewhere. That’s why i’m signing— no mouth. I thought, since you work at this shop, you could help me?”

“Mmhmm,” Mara said, “I know a bit about hexes. Not a lot of people go around cursing though, and I definitely haven’t heard of a curse that makes you lose your head. You mean you’ve been feeling anxious? Out of sorts? Mercury retrograde, maybe?”

“No,” they said, “ I…” their hands hovered in the air, thinking. “I literally lost my head.”

Mara’s spoon nudged her chicken. “What, like, there’s nothing under there?”

“Yes! I need help. I need to break it, the curse, or find my head,” they said, their motions becoming more frantic. “I’ve been like this since the beginning of February, and I’ve had to keep this stupid helmet on all the time! I mean, it was my fault, and I get it, I learned my lesson, but I want my head back.” The helmet tipped forward a bit, and was righted quickly.

Mara sighed. She’d had a few prank calls come in to the shop before, stupid teenagers or kids, but this was dragging on. This person had to be at least eighteen if not older. Way too old to be pranking people, especially while they were working. If Mara wasn’t so tired, she’d have been pissed at this person for wasting her lunch time.

“Alright,” Mara said, “I don’t appreciate being made fun of. Even if I did believe you, I’m pretty positive there’s no curse for making people’s heads disappear. I have sage, teas that help you sleep, and essential oils on these lovely reclaimed wooden shelves. Thanks for my lunch, but if you wanna buy something, you’re gonna have to come back in an hour when my breaks over.”

Mara went to the door and waited, holding it open. Reluctantly, the delivery person walked through the door. “Sorry to bother,” they said.

Mara wasn’t sure what came over her, but she felt bad for this person— and the “lost head” joke sparked a memory. “Listen,” she said, “I don’t know if you’re trying to test my childhood fairytale knowledge or what, but a lost head sounds more like fey. You know, faeries? I don’t even know why I’m telling you this. Go prank someone else, huh?”

“Really? Fey?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“Thank you!”

Mara swung the door shut and locked it again, checked that it was locked. Well. That wasn’t as bad as halloween. Teenagers asking her questions about ouija boards, magic wands, all around wasting her time. She jabbed at her rice, deciding it needed more soy sauce.

The roar of the motorcycle was strangely absent. She peeked out the window, and was right— the delivery person was leaning against the motorcycle, looking at something on their phone. A strong gust of wind blew then, knocking over sandwich signs and trash from the street. It also managed to tip over the bike, followed by it’s rider. Straining to see, Mara stood on her tiptoes. It lay on it’s side, wheels up, and all Mara could see of the delivery person was a pair of shoes, and an errant shoulder. Mara tried to follow that shoulder up, up, but the bike obscured too much. And the helmet, which was lying about a foot away had fallen off! Before Mara could even think about going outside, the delivery person snatched it with quick hands, and stuck it back on.

Mara would have forgotten about it. She wouldn’t have given it a second thought. But the way that shoulder was positioned… Mara was dead sure that she should have been able to see their head, even if the bike was in the way.

She should have been able to see a head, but she didn’t. She couldn’t.

Mara worried her lip. In twenty minutes now, her break would be over, and she hadn’t even gotten to her desert yet. She watched the delivery person start up their bike, kick up the stand, and drive away. She’d have to ask her boss about “lost head” curses tomorrow.

~~~

Thanks for reading! If you like this story, feel free to check out my other stories like Jupiter’s Curse or The Market Value of Holy Water is Exactly One Glazed Donut ! Also, if you’d like to support a POC writer, my Patreon and Kofi are linked in my bio~ I’m also on instagram @ jonnyblackwrites, where I write poetry!

#fiction #original fiction #short story #fantasy #fantasy short story #short stories #poc writer #poc author #writers of tumblr #asl #asl short story #asl character #short fic #jonnyblackwrites #short story sunday #spilled ink #metaphysical store #writeblr

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noblecrumpet-dorkvision · 6 years

Text

D&D Class Cocktails

I originally just wanted to make cocktails for my players based on their character classes, but then I got a little too much into it and made ones for each of the twelve D&D classes! Two of them are from a Youtube channel that does this all the time (part of what inspired me to do so) and you can find links to them for the Vicious Mockery and Eldritch Patron drinks. The ones that I ended up spending time (and money) making I was able to take Insta-worthy pics of for the post. Either way, enjoy!

Barbarian Rage

½ oz Lime Juice

1 oz Tequila

1 can Stout

Lime Wedge

I feel like anything that has a head on it counts as a barbarian’s drink, but this one also has tequila to fuel the rage. Pour the stout into a tankard, crush the can against your head. Pour the tequila and lime juice into a 1.5 oz shot glass. Dunk the shot into the tankard, then crush the lime with your bare hands over the drink, ignoring the pain from any cuts sustained through combat, and drop it in. Enjoy.

Vicious Mockery

¼ Orange, Muddled

1 ½ oz. Spiced Rum

1 oz. Jaegermeister

Several dashes Peychaud's Bitters, to taste

Orange Twist for garnish

From the lovely people over at Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies. I mean if it ain’t broken don’t fix it. Muddle the orange quarter, add the spiced rum, Jaeger, bitters, and ice, then mix and garnish with the orange twist. Bound to deal d4s of psychic damage.

Turn Undead

½ oz Elderflower Liqueur

2 oz White Rum

2 oz White Cranberry Juice

¼ oz Lime Juice

4 Basil Leaves

Club Soda

This is meant to look clear (or close to it) as if it's pure enough to turn undead itself. Kinda like boozy holy water. Muddle two of the basil leaves. Shake the muddled basil, rum, cranberry juice, elderflower liqueur, and lime juice with ice. Then strain into a glass and top with the club soda and garnish with remaining basil.

Druidcraft

1½ oz Gin

1 oz Elderflower liqueur

½ oz Honey

¾ oz Lemon Juice

2 oz Club Soda

1 tsp Culinary Lavender

3 Sage Leaves

I actually make this one a lot... I just named it for this post. It's very floral and light, like you would expect from a druid. Shake together the gin, elderflower liqueur, honey, lemon juice, lavender, and two muddled sage leaves with ice, then strain into a glass. Garnish with the remaining sage leaf. Little bits of the lavender getting in the drink is fine. If you don’t want to slurp them up you can easily use a straw too.

Action Surge

1 ¾ oz Vodka

¼ oz Triple Sec

4 oz Surge Soda

Splash Cranberry Juice

2 lime slices

2 maraschino cherries

This one was very tasty. Prepare a highball glass with lime slices and some maraschino cherries and half-fill with ice. Mix the vodka, triple sec, and Surge together (don't shake, it's soda). Pour into the prepared glass and top with a splash of the cranberry juice. Besides the Surge pun, the red slowly combining with the green almost seems like it's the blood pumping through the fighter as they proceed to literally take an entire extra turn.

Flurry of Blows

1 oz Gin

½ oz Triple Sec

½ oz Peach Schnapps

½ oz Lemon Juice

1 oz Ginger Ale or Ginger Beer

1-2 Leaves Basil

A series of three shots to take. Careful, one is a Stunning Strike and hits much harder than the other two! Muddle your basil leaves and stir with the lemon juice and ginger ale/beer. Put the peach schnapps into one 1.5 oz shot glass, the triple sec into another, and the gin into the third. Top off each shot glass with the lemon-ginger-basil mixture. Ideally, only the one with the gin will really do anything.

Divine Smite

½ c. Apple Cider

½ tbsp Maple Syrup

1 oz Whiskey

Fresh Rosemary

2 Dried Rosemary Sprigs

This one was very good. Burn some dried rosemary and place the glass upside-down over it to let the smoke coat the inside of the glass. Shake fresh rosemary, cider, maple syrup, and whiskey with ice and strain into the smoked glass. For garnish, burn another rosemary twig, blow it out, and drop into the drink so it lets off smoky wisps. The theory for this one is the smoke is the aftermath of the paladin's smite. I used a martini glass because I have a limited variety of glasses but I feel like the garnish floats too much. If I did it again I might use a lowball glass with rocks to keep the rosemary in place.

Hunter's Mark

2 oz Maker’s Mark Bourbon

1 oz Lemon Juice

1 tsp Cane Sugar

Club Soda

Lemon Round

Hopefully the pun resonates. Shake the bourbon, lemon juice, and sugar with ice and strain into a lowball glass. Top with a bit of club soda and garnish with a lemon round pierced with a toothpick right through the bullseye. I did a hack job turning the toothpick into an arrow. You could probably get away with those hors d'oeuvres toothpicks that have the colorful frilled tips for the arrow's fletching.

Sneak Attack

5-6 oz Orange Juice

1 oz Peach Schnapps

2 oz Vodka

Cream Soda

Orange Twist

Red Syrup (I just made 2:1, sugar:water ratio of simple syrup with red food coloring; grenadine was too runny when I tried it)

Named because the alcohol is completely hidden by the sugary drink. It will indeed sneak up on you. Dip the rim of the glass in the red syrup, then turn over so it drips down the glass. Stir the orange juice and vodka and pour into the glass without touching the sides (I don’t own a highball glass but that would probably look nicer). Top the drink with cream soda. Garnish with an orange twist (use those little plastic swords if you have em!)

Maximized Fireball

2 oz Fireball Shiskey

1 oz Dry Vermouth

1 Dash of Bitters

Orange Twist

Cinnamon Stick Soaked in Bacardi 151

Stir the ingredients together with ice then strain into a lowball glass. Garnish with a "flamed" orange twist (squeezed over a lit match into the glass). Light the cinnamon stick on fire, then drop into the drink. I know Fireball gets a lot of flack but I mean, come on, it's the name of the spell. You could try that Tabasco whiskey instead if you hate Fireball.

Eldritch Patron

2 oz Gin

½ oz Vermouth

¼ oz Black Sambuca

3 Dashes Black Walnut Bitters

Green Maraschino Cherries

Another one from Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies. Stir the gin, vermouth, Sambuca and bitters with ice then strain into a martini glass. Garnish with the green cherries. Looks like alien eyeballs in an inky darkness, as it should.

The Spellbook

12 oz Pinot Grigio

2 oz Blue Curacao

2 oz Lemonade

2 oz Simple Syrup

Blue Petal Dust (optional)

Orange Juice

Lemon-Lime soda

Fruits like oranges, cherries, and starfruit, cut into slices

Mix all the ingredients into a punch bowl, then add equal parts orange juice and the soda to fill it out. Add the fruit slices. I used starfruit because it looks wizardy, but you can always add whatever you want to your Spellbook, as long as you spend gold and time based on the spell's level. The blue petal dust can be used to make the drink opalescent, though I imagine it will be less apparent in a big bowl. Try mixing it individual glasses.

#dungeons & dragons #DnD 5e #cocktails #drinks #mixed drinks #D&D #DnD #D&D 5e

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rebellect-writes · 4 years

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[SIZE=1][b]Name:[/b] Jess. [b]Age:[/b] 20. [b]How did you find us?:[/b] I hate this question. [b]How did this happen?:[/b] Chase and Fallon refused to kill him.

[b]Name:[/b] Nathan Eliot Travis. [b]Nicknames & Aliases:[/b][LIST] [*] Nickname: Nat. (Earns some responses at times.) [*] Nickname: Nate. (Earns less responses than Nat.) [*] Nickname: Travis. (Responds to this!) [*] Alias: Nathan Reese. [/LIST][b]Age:[/b] 42. [b]Date of Birth:[/b] July 31st 1969. [b]Gender:[/b] Male, defiantly a male. [b]Sexual Orientation:[/b] Straight. He’s not exactly looking right though. [b]Occupation:[/b] Works at Resurrect-R-Us.

[b]Nightly Raising Limit:[/b] 2 on his own, 3 with help from another animator. [b]Standing Rising Kit:[/b][LIST] [*] A sacrifice. Which is usually a chicken, sometimes a goat, or even his own blood. [*] A ceremonial knife. His knife is a simple hunting knife. [*] A jar of ointment. Which is basically blended Rosemary, Cloves, Sage, Thyme and graveyard mould. [*] Salt. [/LIST]

[b]Powers:[/b] [LIST]Nathan is an animator. Which means he was born with the power to raise the dead from their graves prior to the deceased soul leaving its body and moving on into the next life. It’s not as easy as it sounds either, there’s no waving a magic wand and saying a few words and hey presto, a zombie appears. An animator’s job is more ritualistic than that. – Nathan: Which is probably why it pays as much as it does. – Unless they mess up that is, but nine times out of ten, nothing bad happens.

While he was born with the power in him, he still needs some tools for the trade. Those include, and I kid you not, chickens or goats and at times he’s even needed a pig, as the summoning involves a sacrifice. The older the zombie, the bigger the sacrifice, and since he doesn’t like ruining his jeep with farm yard animals, Nathan tries to keep it to chickens and the odd goat. Nathan also needs the zombie’s name in the ritual, the full name is best but if he’s pushed then the given birth name will do. During the ritual, Nathan circles the grave with the blood of the sacrifice, ‘drawing’ a circle of power. Now, normally he’s the only person in that circle when he raises someone, but at times relatives of the deceased want to do things or ask things so Nathan makes them stand behind the grave marker before feeding the zombie blood and then giving the other person a chance to ask what they want. As a newly raised zombie has no memory and needs blood fed to them to regain their knowledge of their former life, Nathan gets through the basics first and hopes to God that anyone else inside the circle with him would be ballsy enough to disrupt the ritual.

So, he circles the grave with blood and power by picturing a glowing circle in his mind, it’s a double edged sword. Dead things can’t get out and dead things can’t get into it without him breaking the circle. With that done he dabs the blood of the sacrifice on his forehead, cheeks and heart, then repeats the motion with the ointment before smearing the headstone with both blood and ointment. The chant he then has to say is pretty basic [i]“Hear us, (corpse name). We call you from your grave. By blood, magic and steel, we call you. Arise, (corpse name), come to us, come to us. (corpse name X2) come to us. Waken, (corpse name), arise and come to us.”[/i] With that done, the dead literally rise as the earth covering the zombie rolls away allowing it to rise to Nathan’s command. Since the zombie’s just a zombie, Nathan must then prick his finger and let the zombie taste blood to bring back its memories and give him total control. Insta-zombie! – Nathan: Hey! They have feelings now you know. – Questions can be asked and then he can send the zombie back to its resting place with salt and the chant to release them. Then its just a matter of going back to the car and cleaning up.

He also has the minor ability to sense the dead, and occasionally see human souls and ghosts that haven’t moved on. They’re nothing more than shades really, and so he doesn’t give them much attention. Everyone knows if you give ghosts attention, they’ll come back for more and more of it. [/LIST]

[b]Face Claim:[/b] Simon Baker. [b]Description:[/b] [IMG]http://i54.tinypic.com/33o7790.jpg[/IMG][LIST]Nathan? A remarkably stunning male that needs to be in a fashion magazine? Never! He is however 5 feet and 10 inches tall and of average build, though – Nathan: I work out....Sometimes. – he looks a bit bigger than his 160lbs in weight. He can hold his own in a fight though for a time, and I suppose that’s what counts in the end right? Well, he’s also got blonde hair that can be mistaken for mousy brown when it’s wet or under certain lighting, and stunning green eyes and that’s about it.

Oh! You want more, ok. His hands are rough with small scars from his work; those scars turn a little bigger and more pronounced against his skin as you move up to the wrists. Suicidal, psh, never, but it’s often mistaken for such. Tattoos, piercings and Nathan don’t belong in the same sentence. Nathan has nothing in the way of ink work or metal work and has never shown interest in getting things like that done and likely won’t anytime in the future. While he may not have any work done himself, he does take an interest in stuff like that at times. – Nathan: its art, of course it’s interesting. –

Nathan tends to wear suits more than casual clothes like jeans and t-shirts but he won’t rule them out. A nice suit can promote maturity and professionalism, and that seems to calm down distraught clients. Of course, there’s that and the fact that suits are cool. He won’t rule out t-shirts and jeans though, he tends to wear them more when he’s spending time at home or on his day off. [/LIST]

[b]Special Skills:[/b] [LIST] [*] Has a degree in preternatural biology. [*] Has helped in multiple RPIT cases stateside and brought in four killers. [*] A good listener when people need a shoulder to cry on. [*] Can summon a zombie up to 130 years old. [*] Giving blood. Yes, this means he’ll feed vampires in a pinch as well. [*] He’s good with a knife but he won’t ever use it against anyone. [*] Screw your weapons; he has logic on his side. [*] Knows a bit of Spanish, just enough to get by really. [/LIST] [b]Personality:[/b] [LIST]Nathan isn’t a generally moody person, he likes to see the positive side of things rather than the negative and often remains open minded about things around him. Some would say that he’s blunt and cocky at times, but that’s more because when he sees things, he doesn’t always think about what he’s saying until he’s actually said it and getting weird looks from people. When he’s thinking about the situation before him, Nathan can be the polite charmer that can pick up on other people’s emotions and body language quiet well, and will often manipulate people into emotional situations that suit them all. He doesn’t do it to be malicious, he does it to give people a piece of mind because really, he doesn’t like people to be all about the doom and gloom in their lives. – Nathan: I refuse to be that one emo guy in the corner; I won’t let others suffer either! –

So he’s the token smiler and the charmer, and a bit of an odd ball for apparently caring. – Nathan: You forgot impudent, annoying and clever, my dear. Opportunistic at times as well.– You’ve got to earn respect to get it, Nathan’s a fond believer of that and while people may cower and cringe around angry supernatural’s he won’t do it without due course to do so, say like, he’s being paid to do it and only then would he cower like a struck dog. Since his boss signs the pay check, he has to be nice to them, and will often swing from being a fake to a cheeky flirt. –Nathan: The last time I did that, I ended up with knee to the groin. Please don’t paint me out to be something I’m not most of the time. – Nathan will often feel bad for victims of supernatural violence, be it a lycanthrope mauling or a vampire killing, or anything else and if he’s called into help on a RPIT case, he’ll do his best to help and once it’s solved, sink into oblivion with a nice bottle of alcohol.

Yeah, he doesn’t instantly trust anyone either. He may appear like it but he’s always on his guard until he decides that he doesn’t need to hide behind the fake smile, and cryptic puzzle loving mind. Nathan can be impulsive at times, often doing things without telling anyone until he needs help or after the fact because he’s a bit of a masochist that way. He doesn’t often accept help, either in day to day life or working life, but when he does, he obviously feels a need to have it. Nathan tends to keep a lot of emotions bottled up at time, it’s nothing intentional on his part, he just does it unconsciously for reasons spanning back years. Doing this has gifted him with the inability to sleep properly on a night, instead of getting the recommended eight hours; Nathan rarely gets more than four at a push.

He does have a bit of a bad side though and you can tell the difference if you know him well enough. He withdraws into himself and often keeps his thoughts to himself, even when asked to share he won’t do it. He’s the type of person that likes pushing buttons and playing mind games with people so this is a startling difference in his person. He doesn’t get violent and smack people about like some thug on an ego trip, but some of his snappy growled comments will often leave marks that he will try and fix later on when he’s calmed down if he’s presented with the opportune moment to do so. He doesn’t like being angry, isn’t naturally angry, so there’s no real need to leave things fester just to be cruel.

Nathan’s an excommunicated catholic – Nathan: If God loves all, then the Pope is an idiot for excommunicating all animators and necromancers because they can summon the dead. – So he doesn’t have faith like most people that he knows does, thus a Holy item won’t protect him. He’s an Atheist and proud of it. He just doesn’t believe in a higher power because it’s illogical and he won’t believe until there’s proof of said power before his very eyes. However, saying that, you could also label him as Agnostic because if vampires and other supernatural creatures exist, then why shouldn’t a “God”? Now, his views on the supernatural community are a little more logical. Well, since he’s a part of it he can’t complain much about it. He won’t put himself in the middle of angry vampires or lycanthropes because he knows that they have a system of their own. He will however, step in and try and diffuse the situation if there are other humans involved between other beings because it’s only natural for him to help the underdog. [/LIST][b]Likes:[/b][LIST] [*] Puzzles and challenges. [*] Relaxing after a long day with a puzzle book. [*] A nice glass of red wine, or a cup of tea. [*] Risings that go to plan. [*] Walks on the beach. [*] Sleep when he can get it. [*] Helping people out to the best of his ability. [*] Going for a walk if he’s restless. [*] Appearing professional in everything he does. [*] A home cooked meal over fast food. [/LIST][b]Dislikes:[/b][LIST] [*] Sunrises. It means he’s worked all night long. [*] Ankle biting dogs. Have you ever been bitten by one of them? He has! [*] Vampires that thing they’re all that. [*] People that take no badly. [*] Noisy criers. Zombie rising is hard work without the distraction as it is. [*] People that think being ‘supernatural’ is a crime against God. [*] Killing goats for work. He likes to make do with chickens. [*] When his computer doesn’t work, because he has no idea how to fix it. [*] Types of people that spoil movies or books before he reads or watches. [*] A promising challenge turning into a dud. [/LIST][b]Strengths:[/b][LIST] [*] Will be polite if he’s with civil people. [*] Can follow orders, in his own way. [*] Is professional when it comes to his work. [*] Doesn’t drink through the week, that’s saved for the weekends. [*] He’s got a good mind; he just over uses it to the point of abuse. [/LIST][b]Weaknesses:[/b][LIST] [*] He’s anyone’s for a nice cup of tea. [*] Victims of supernatural crime, particularly children. [*] Isn’t that technological advanced. [*] Attitude and trust problems. [*] Bull-headed reckless streak. [*] Can be pretty oblivious to things at time. [/LIST][b]Fears:[/b][LIST] [*] Claustrophobia: He’s tried to get help for this, but there’s nothing to be done. It’s an irrational phobia that makes him terrified of confined spaces. [*] Belonephobia: He’s afraid of needles and will faint if they’re used on him. He’s fine if he doesn’t look but this phobia’s what’s pushed him to avoid many medical experiences than he cares to mention. [*] Being the cause of an out of control zombie of any kind. [*] Being tricked into raising a murder victim from the grave. [/LIST][b]Family:[/b][LIST] [*] Janet Reese: mother : alive. [*] Elliot Travis: father : unknown. [*] Ines Reese: grandmother : alive. [*] Jonas Reese: grandfather : dead. [/LIST][b]History:[/b] [LIST]Nathan Elliot Travis was born in downtown San Diego, California way back in July 1969. He was the surprise – Nathan: More like unwanted but mother never was to hurt people’s feelings. - Birth of female police officer, Janet Reese who before she had found out about the pregnancy, had recently changed her name back to her maiden name after a long year of family and relationship drama that she wanted to put behind her. Nathan was simply the product of a very brief fling with her former husband Elliot Travis and she didn’t know about their child until it was too late and she was screaming blue murder and cursing all males within a thirty mile radius of her. Now, as an unwanted child, you’d think that his childhood would’ve been one full of heartache and misery but it really wasn’t. His mother loved him with every breath in her body and even though she’d given up her badge without thinking about it when he’d been born, she never once let people put her down or her son for that matter. So what if his Grandparents where old fashioned and thought that he should’ve been put into the foster system because his mother couldn’t cope! She would be twice as mean back and just as stubborn as them and prove that she could. Since she was a single mom though, things were hard on her. If Nathan got sick, she would go without sleep and food just to make sure that he was better. If he outgrew any clothes, she would go without stuff for him all the more. The stubborn streak was what cost Janet the semi support of her parents by the time Nathan was three years old, and brought into the young man’s life something that Janet had never wanted. His father.

Elliot Travis was a manipulator, he wooed his mother for months after finding out that he had a son by her and almost a year later, he was back in her bed and in her body as well as her mind. Nathan didn’t like this man from day one and while most children wanted to be like their father and impress them, Nathan did not because at the end of the day there was only enough room in the house for two people. His father had to go. – Nathan: You make it sound so malicious than it actually was at the time. – Nathan started to plot little things at first, typically childish stuff like dumping his father’s wallet into the bin or tossing his car keys out of the window and into the garden hoping and praying that someone would find them or that they’d get buried under garden refuse. He even went as far as switching the setting on the washing machine to shrink Elliot’s clothes. Poor Nathan, he got the shock of his life when his father found him red handed pouring paint on all of Elliot’s clothes just after his eighth birthday, his plan had been to blame the decorators that Elliot had hired to redo the ‘marital room’ – Nathan: Oh lovely, I think I’ve just been sick in my mouth. - If it ever came about. Elliot beat Nathan into submission both physically and also mentally. He swore that if Nathan played anymore tricks, that Nathan would be made to watch Elliot hurt his mother and that alone put Nathan back in his place for many years to come. Of course the occasional beating that was brushed off as accidents helped Elliot control Nathan, as well as the threats towards Janet’s safety and wellbeing. It all stopped by the time he was fourteen thankfully, but it would be one of those memories that Nathan would keep for the rest of his life.

He’d been suffering at school, insomnia during the night and headaches and nausea, the inability to hold down food for more than five minutes before running to the bathroom, had affected his grades and performance on a whole as well as his life. His mother was worried, almost frantic that something was seriously wrong with her son, but Elliot didn’t care. He tried to calm Janet down but she had none of that and called in the grandparents. Nathan had an alright relationship with them, they neither loved him or hated him and defiantly didn’t try to beat him like Elliot did. His grandmother took an interest immediately when she found out that he hadn’t been sleeping or eating. Granny Ines put her foot down so hard when Nathan complained that he wasn’t hungry or lied when he said that he was going to try and sleep. Sure it made her angry but what really infuriated the dear old soul was the time when she’d come to give Nathan some clothes to put in his wardrobe – Nathan: I remember that night. Mom was on a date and they were babysitting. - And saw the bruises on his ribs and back. Nathan broke and told her every single detail, and at fourteen years of age, it was hard to ignore [i]the look[/i].

By the time Elliot and Janet returned, Nathans Grandfather Jonas was waiting. Jonas at the time knew everything – Nathan: Well, not everything. I didn’t tell them about me trying to get rid of Elliot in the first place – and just like Ines, he was furious and simply set the big old German shepherd dogs he kept around the back of the house on Eliot to scare the live out of him. Hex and Hooligan did their job, but what was worse, Ines told Janet the whole sordid tale and Nathan’s mother saw red. In the following days, Nathan enjoyed peace. Elliot was out of his life – Nathan: Go, go gadget restraining order! - And in an amusing turn of events, Nathan had his grandparents around in his life more often and his mother had her parents back. All was well, until a year or so later when Jonas suffered a heart attack which proved too much for the seventy two year old and slowly killed him. Nathan shouldn’t have been listening in on the brief conversation between his grandparents, but the talk of being brought back and his grandmother agreeing had caught and held his attention in its poisonous grasp and still weighed heavily on his thoughts throughout the following day into the next until Ines informed him and his mother that Jonas had passed away. The look that she gave Nathan though, removed any idea that he’d not been caught spying and listening in.

After Jonas’ funeral, his grandmother drew him aside. She explained...things to him. She was a long retired vaudun priestess, having left her religious beliefs behind when she’d found her true love and could bring the dead back for brief periods of time. Monsters from fairytales and movies were real and lurking in the shadows preying on people and the world was in for a very big wakeup call someday. Instead of brushing her off as a distraught widow, Nathan believed her, he could sense something about Ines now that he hadn’t been able to sense before, and he begged her to train him as her apprentice and seeing something in the young one, his grandmother agreed. Thus, at the age of sixteen, Nathan Travis’ mind was opened to a world bigger than the one that he thought he knew. Oh, Ines poked and prodded that spark in Nathan and helped him grow in his power and never gave him a break. She wasn’t the best mentor – Nathan: Her words, not mine. She said them repeatedly. – But she wasn’t exactly the same as Nathan was. He’d been born with this power, but she couldn’t work out how he’d got it since Janet hadn’t been born with it. However, they rarely sat down and brooded about things in the past because there was always something new that she could teach him and by the time he was twenty one, he’d brought back his first zombie on his own and Ines declared that there was nothing else to teach him.

What could a young animator do in a world that didn’t accept the supernatural? Vampires and were-creatures? He knew that they were there thanks to his grandmothers training and her lessons. He could now make out the souls of recently dead and lingering ghosts if he focused hard enough. He was at a loss, and even though he knew things that not many did, he hid away. Got on with life and moved to New York, then when he got bored with New York, he tried his luck in New Orleans a few years after in 1995, bouncing back to San Diego three times a year to see his mother and Ines when he could. It was great. For awhile he forgot that he could bring back the dead, for awhile he was normal. Then the supernatural world came out of hiding in 1997 and everything changed. Vampires where hunted, lycanthropes where run out of jobs and lynched in the streets, supposed “psychics” and other people that worked with magic where arrested. It was bad times for everyone and people where scared but in 2000 supernatural became legal. It still didn’t stop people from being scared and angry. – Nathan: They had a right to be as well. I’d have been scared if I hadn’t known before hand. -

That was eleven years ago, in that time Nathan’s moved from New Orleans to San Francisco, from there to Atlantic City, and to Toronto plying his trade as a freelance consultant for RPIT teams and anyone needing their formerly alive loved ones returned for a little while, never really running with the ‘’big dogs’’ in reanimation until 2006. By that time he was in trouble, up to his eyeballs in debt and needed the money that a proper position in an animation firm could get him as well as signing himself up as a stable retainer for the Toronto RPIT teams. It took him nearly five years to dig himself out of debt and save up for another move. Outside of San Diego growing up as a kid, five years was the longest time that he’d ever stayed in one place and it was starting to get to him.

Nathan would’ve ended up in another city if he hadn’t heard from an English vampire about this quaint little city England. Jackford. He was told that it was one of England’s supernatural hotspots, and surprised that it wasn’t London, or Cardiff or any of the more commonly known places. Since it was overseas, Nathan had to wait another year to sort through paperwork and stuff to move overseas, while researching Jackford and in February of 2011, early he actually made it to England! Well, London really but close enough to his final destination. –Nat: Now I’ve just got to secure a job and a home and not be stuck in a hotel for the rest of my time here. – It’s now early March, he’s finally made it to Jackford and he has no idea what’s going to happen next. [/LIST][/SIZE]

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snarkandsarcasmftw · 4 years

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tag games, ftw

I was tagged by both @rampagewriting and @heelsamizayn to answer this and it seems like a fun time and my brain’s being a bag of dicks rn, so whhhhy not... Here we go.

0) Name/Nickname? If ya wanna share it.

Ashley, AA, Snark - mostly on here. Oh and lil bit, but... family only.

1) If you could bring any two fictional characters (from books or film/tv) into the same world who would they be, what world would you put them in, and what would their relationship to each other be?

Uhhh... Uhhh... Okay, alright, hm... This is going to be an unconventional answer but.. I’d take Bucky and Cap and I’d drop them right into the middle of The Walking Dead. Hear me out.. They’re both military trained / enhanced superheroes and they can walk that line of having compassion and being totally ruthless if they must. I think it’d be neat. They’d be friends / psuedo brothers, of course.

2) If you could drop yourself into any fictional world from books or film/tv, which would it be?

Oh god, oh noooo.. Every part of the fifteen year old trapped within my old woman body is screaming at me to answer Harry Potter -cos magic.. But.. I’m going with The Walking Dead. Just for the simple fact that I could smack both Lori and Dale Horvath in the back of the fuckin head.

Alternately.. I’d really wanna hunt vampires with Edgar and Allen Frog, and the eighties were my shit, so.. That too.

3) What’s your spirit animal?

A cat or a raccoon. I have under eye circles, stay up late, eat only junk and I’ll bite if you take my food plus kinda chonky ( raccoon) and I like to take naps, I’m... adamant about cleaning / grooming plus, I like to sit around and give people side eye when they’re doing dumb shit. ( cat.)

4) What is the most unpopular opinion you hold?

NO. NOPE. NOT ANSWERING. ISSA TRAP.

Okay, since I obviously have to put something here, I’ll say it. And I’ll start with wrestling:

Seth Rollins is vastly overrated and I don’t get the whole.. Attraction to him. And the same goes for Cody Rhodes. Also, is it just me or are his fucking intros too long? Idk, maybe that’s me and my lack of patience. If you like either of these, sorry, continue to do you, but.. I’m not a fan and I honestly don’t particularly care about either and this is my own personal opinion. I’m allowed to have one. I’m not saying bad shit about either guy here, if you take it that way, it’s your own damn problem? I’m not telling you not to like them. I’m simply saying I do not.

As far as media goes : Fifty Shades of Gray is fucking dumb. I mean.. 10 page contract.. to get what has to be mediocre dick, at best? And it’s not even written with any regards to true BDSM concepts for the most part? Nah. I’ll pass.

And now, for one about our current situation: I think the idiots who hoarded TP at the beginning of this should be allowed to return things.. Provided it’s unopened, they have a receipt, and they don’t see a fucking dime of the money they spent and that the money from the returns goes to masks / other methods of protection for front line workers or straight into the unemployment packages and the stimulus thing. Like literally, the hoarder gets nothing, people who need TP / sanitizer / etc get UNOPENED NEW PRODUCTS and the front line workers get the proceeds of the voided returns. We all win here. (I realize this probably cannot happen, but. It’s one way to kind of... help this current shit show we’re all trapped in.)

5) How do you like to style your hair most often?

Uhh.. Down. I’m too goddamn lazy to be bothered.

6) I always love this overdone question - you’re allowed three books on a desert island, what do you bring? (Note: Survival Guides don’t count).

The Shining, The Dark Towers series - Stephen King, The Client - John Grisham and The Outsiders - S.E Hinton

7) Something new you’ve learned in quarantine/lockdown/corona times?

That no matter how hard I try, I cannot apply false lashes. That more than two noisy things going in the background is TOO MUCH. Oh and I’m pretty damn good at baking when I bother to try / don’t toss out the directions.

8) Favorite alcohol? (Or non-alcoholic beverage if you don’t drink!)

Haven’t drank in... a while-ish. But my favorite thing to drink when I do is vodka or tequila. Occasionally White Claw ( i know, i know.). Favorite non-alcoholic beverage is water lately.

9) Music you can’t stand? Music you love?

I’m gonna get torn the fuck apart for this but yolo.. I can’t get into K-Pop. I’ve tried. It’s just.. It’s up there with new pop for me. Older boy bands / pop stars? Not a problem. I just don’t like a lot of pop music and I can’t get into K-pop. If you like it, awesome. It’s just not for me personally. Beyond that? I love literally any other kind of music. I have a veeeery varied eclectic listening preference but my all time favorite? 80′s glam / pop or country.

10) Have a favorite herb?

FIRST OF ALL.. GARLIC.. yeah, it’s not a herb buuuut... yeah.. Anyway, for actual herbs..Basil, Rosemary and Sage.. Oh and cilantro. Cilantro will save your ass in a pinch.

11) What kinds of cups/glasses/bottles do you prefer to drink out of?

My big tol cold cup. Or.. my stemless plastic wine glasses, of which I have apparently lost.

12) Preferred mode of communication: texts, phone calls, emails, letters?

Text or email. I’m not... fond of making calls, but I will if I have to. I prefer texts or email. Oh, I do enjoy writing letters now and then.

13) What is your favorite weather?

Not too hot, not too cold. Not too sunny but not overcast and gray either. A light breeze. NO POLLEN.

14) What kind of lighting do you like?

Softer lights, for the aesthetic.. Overhead lighting, so my blind ass can... yannow... see. If I had my way, I’d have candles and string lights every where though.

15) What is the best thing you cook?

Honestly, I feel like it’s my chili or my stew. Alternately, husband seems to ask for chicken / bacon / ranch pasta casserole a lot, so... Idk.. I guess pretty much anything (except fucking hamburger helper, i can NEVER get this shit right, despite directions, sacrifices to the culinary gods and pleas/promises of my first born. It always turns out icky so I never cook it.)

16) Do you have a favorite font to write in?

Handwriting or typewriter fonts for the most part. Roboto when I’m writing / editing my own fics and such.

17) What is something you’ve always wanted to write in a fic, but you’ve been too afraid to? Or, what is something that you were afraid to write, but then you did and it ended awesome?

Honestly, I’m scared to death to write smut. Which is why I’ve been trying to write more of it lately. I won’t say it’s going awesome ( I’m pretty sure some of you sit and read it when I post and are like what the fuck... this isn’t realistic and this is so bad.) but it’s going.

I’ve wanted to dip my toes into writing for more obscure fandoms too. Like ones that I personally enjoy. As far as something I’ve always wanted to write? Horror. But I’m scared to death I’d fuck it up.

18) If you were in your favorite fantasy world, what would your weapon of choice be?

A sword or a knife. Machete, maybe?

19) Is there a commonly used expression/saying that you can’t stand?

While I agree with the answers J and K put to this “It’s in God’s hands, etc” - sometimes things are GOD AWFUL. The last thing I want to hear is what the reason God had for doing it is. So don’t tell me.

Triggered is a useful term.. if it’s used right. And I’m starting to realize that 95 percent of people DO NOT know the proper use. They think that being triggered =‘s a reason to bitch and tear someone apart over some miniature thing they’ve done. So now, when I hear it being misused, it fucking annoys me.

20) What is something that you would like people to know about you?

I’m a grumpy ball of rage. I’m petty as fuck and saltier than all the oceans combined in the right circumstances. But.. I can be a nice person and I love getting to know people and helping people or talking to them. Even if it’s hard for me to start it off bc I’m fucking awkward as fuck also - hence the reason it takes a while for me to actually... attempt... conversing with new people both IRL and on here.

I’m gonna leave this open to anyone who wants to do it bc Idk who has or hasn’t already and I don’t want to annoy people.

This was a blast!

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allthephils · 5 years

Text

Spells and Other Life Skills

Or How Dan and Phil Got Their TV Back

A cursed diamond is not forever, hopefully.

Word count: 2580 Rated G (Tiny mention of blood, magic)

This was written for @phanfictionevents telephone event. I wrote the last bit and the first two parts were written by @mctaetae613 and @itsmyusualphannie !

Read on AO3

“Uh, Phil?”

Dan’s voice made the raven-haired man look up from his laptop’s screen. His gaze fell upon his partner, who had a very confused expression on. Daniel was currently staring intently at their dining table with one of his eyebrows raised. Philip followed the brunette’s gaze towards the table. His whole face fell as he noticed what was missing.

“Where’d it go?” Dan asked as he immediately turned to look at Phil. The older man cowered under his furious glare. “Phil, where’d it go?”

Phil gulped, already imagining what was yet to come. Still, he couldn’t give up so quickly. He forced out a smile, pushing his tongue through his teeth as he always did, only this time he did it consciously. “What do you mean, Dan?” He squeaked out. “I left it there as soon as we got home. Uh, maybe it moved?”

The brunette let out a long, defeated sigh as he set his laptop down on their couch. He tended to move his arms around when he talked, and he really didn’t feel like letting his prized possession fall due to his antics. “It’s an inanimate object. It shouldn’t be able to move on its own, you do realize?”

“Well,” Phil said as he slowly closed his laptop. A grimace replaced his expression as he could already listened to Dan’s panicked screams. “The diamond…”

“I’ve known you for nearly ten years now, Lester, don’t you dare think I don’t know what that face means.” Dan slowly approached the pale man, his hands on his hips as he did so. “What the fuck are you hiding?”

Phil felt his shoulders rising and his whole body sinking down into their couch as Daniel’s voice got progressively louder. He scrunched up his eyes, raised his hands to cover his face, and squeaked out his response. “It might’ve been haunted!”

The raven-haired man waited for his partner to react. Perhaps a scream, a shoe thrown at him, a defeated sigh, or just any reaction in general. So, when no reaction was ever delivered, Phil opened his eyes and peered through the minimal space between his fingers. He was only met with an open-mouthed, very amused looking Dan. The brunette’s mouth opened and closed a couple of times as he tried to come up with a reply.

“Haunted?” Dan was able to make out after a split second of stuttering and shaking his head. His arms stretched towards Phil, his hands threatening to strangle him before he brought them down on the coffee table standing in their living room. “Haunted, Philip Lester? Have you not learnt a single thing after all we’ve been through?”

Phil grimaced at the sharp crack of the wood beneath the brunette’s hand. He stood up as his partner seemed to constantly keep muttering something under his breath. His right hand slowly settled down on Dan’s shoulder. The other man whipped around, his eyes carrying the clear message of murder as he glared at him. “Come on, Dan,” He said, his eyes big and pleading. “We’ve dealt with things that are way wor––”

The sudden snap of fingers and a hand resting on his own shoulder made Phil stop mid-sentence. His eyes travelled up to Dan’s sudden face of relief and realization.

“That’s it!” The brunette exclaimed as his free hand pointed at the dining table, where the diamond was supposed to be. “That has to be it, Phil!”

“That has to be it? I don’t think we’re quite on th––”

“How long have we had that diamond around for?” Dan asked, rudely cutting Phil off as he continued to go on a frantic rant. “About a month maybe? How long have we been researching about it? Holy fuck that explains so much…”

Phil watched his partner take a couple of steps away from him, his arms waving around excitedly as an expression of pure bliss, relief, and happiness settled on his features. He remained static as he watched his partner scream out in victory and curse half the deities they knew of. The raven-haired man wondered if it would be prudent of him to assume that Dan had finally lost his mind.

“You still don’t get it?” Daniel’s words had come out as a laugh rather than actual words. He took two long strides before standing in front of his partner. His hands held onto the other man’s shoulders as he shook him for a second. “Just think about it, Lester, how has the past month gone for us?”

“Not good?” Phil replied, his words separated by a very long (and very confused) pause.

“It’s been shit!” Dan said as his voice completely drowned Phil’s. “Just think about it for a second. So much has gone down, and it’s all happened with that fucking diamond here.”

Philip ran over the idea in his head. He didn’t have to do much thinking; it seemed like all the horrible things that had happened to them were bound to the diamond in one way or another. He dragged his tongue over his bottom lip as he came to a conclusion.

“So, you think everything that’s been going on has to do with the diamond? Like we set it off or something?”

“Yes!” The brunette replied. His hands cupped Phil’s cheeks as he pulled him in for a short, adrenaline-filled kiss. “Phil Lester, you’re a genius!”

The raven-haired man let out a laugh as he pulled his partner in for another kiss. He let out a laugh as he finally understood the cause of Dan’s euphoria. The past month had been absolute shit for the both of them. From their TV falling from its stand to losing their passports to getting lost in a completely different country. Everytime something particularly bad happened, the diamond was present.

“If the diamond’s really the cause of everything that’s happened,” Philip said, his smile slowly melting away as a sudden realization hit. “What are we going to do about it?”

Dan’s eyes narrowed as he considered what they were going to do. “Hmm,” he said. “Well.” With another glance at the still-empty coffee table, he nodded decisively. “I’ll tell you what we’re going to do. We’re going to find that fucking diamond and we’re going to destroy it with whatever means necessary?”

“Whatever means necessary?” Phil echoed dubiously. He never liked it when Dan said those words. With a terrifying amount of power, though limited, literally at their fingertips, that wasn’t Phil’s favourite thing to hear.

“Yes,” said Dan. He pursed his lips in determination. “All right, let’s find the diamond. I don’t care whether you lost it or not - ”

“It moved itself!” Phil protested, but was ignored.

“ - we’re going to find it.” Dan whirled toward the kitchen. “Look under the cushions!” he called back over his shoulder to Phil. “Just in case. I’ll get the summoning materials.”

Phil sighed heavily and hauled himself up off the couch, turning to lift the cushions he’d just been sitting on to rummage beneath them. As expected, he found nothing but lint, a few coins, and - “Hey, here’s that protection stone that disappeared a few weeks ago!”

“Put it back!” Dan yelled. A cupboard slammed as he flew through cabinets in the kitchen. “I spelled it for gaming.”

So that’s why Phil had been so good at Fortnite lately. He shrugged and tossed it back under the cushions, replacing them. He headed for the kitchen. “I didn’t find anything,” he told Dan, who looked wild-eyed as he yanked various containers out of the fridge.

“I knew you wouln’t,” Dan said, shoving a jar filled with questionable, sticky-looking contents across the counter to join the other items he’d collected already. “I just wanted to keep you busy while I got stuff.”

“Rude,” said Phil absently, wandering over to look at the materials that Dan had already gotten out. “Want me to prep the bowl?”

Dan waved at him. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t forget the calf’s foot this time.”

“When have I ever,” scoffed Phil, distinctly remembering two weeks ago, when he’d been trying to summon a lost sock and instead had caught the sink on fire. The sink had been filled with water.

Dan ignored him again, yanking open the freezer. He paused and reached in slowly to pull out a candle, studying it. “Phil, how - never mind. I don’t want to know.”

“I don’t touch your candles,” Phil protested. He dug through their stack of bowls in the cupboard and found a decent-sized one to slap on the counter, then shuffled through the ingredients that Dan had collected. Finding the oil, he spilled a little in the bowl, then swiped the oil with two fingers to cover the inside of the bowl’s surface. “Where’s the thyme?” he asked, not finding it among the heap of items.

“We’re out, use a pinch of sage and rosemary.”

Phil frowned. “If you say so.” He did so, sprinkling them across the bowl. He maneuvered around Dan to grab the calf’s foot that Dan had just retrieved from the freezer and dumped it in the bowl. “Ew,” he said, watching it with mild disgust as it dripped blood onto the herbs. “Why does gem summoning have to be so gross?”

“Because you’re gross,” said Dan. He had a handful of ingredients and Phil stepped aside to let him drop them all in the bowl.

“Your mum’s gross,” Phil said automatically.

Dan slapped his forearm with a bloody hand and Phil squeaked. “Shut up, twat.”

“Ew!” Phil said with feeling, after recovering from the initial shock. He swiped at the smeared handprint Dan had left on his bare arm. “I hate you.”

“Good, help me finish this.”

Phil turned and shoved the table till it was up against the wall. He grabbed a handful of salt from the jar they kept on the counter and slowly poured, tracing a perfect circle as he walked. Just before joining the ends, he paused and Dan stepped in, cradling the bowl in his hands. Phil drew the last bit in salt and threw a pinch over his shoulder.

“Really Phil?” Dan rolled his eyes at Phil’s superstition as he placed the bowl in the center of the circle. The two of them sat facing each other, the bowl between them.

“Ready?” Phil said. He always started these things. There was just so much energy in Phil, it was best to lead with that and let Dan pull it all down at the end. Phil had the power but Dan had the focus.

“Wait. Should we talk about how we’re gonna kill the thing?”

“What do you mean?” Phil asked, assuming they’d cross that bridge when they came to it.

“Can’t stay in this circle forever Phil.”

“Yeah ok. Um, you could explode it? It’ll take a lot out of you but it’ll be done.”

“Yeah great plan Phil. How do you reckon our kitchen will fare in that scenario?” Dan ran a hand through his curls, thinking. “We could break it into bits and sell it off to jewelers! We’ll make a fortune and it will be scattered all over England, never to be reassembled.”

“But won’t that bring this terrible luck on like every bride to be that gets a piece in a ring?”

Dan shrugged. “I mean, it’ll just be a little bad luck and marriage sucks anyway, they probably won’t notice.”

“No Dan.”

“Throw it in the ocean?” Dan asked.

“And curse the penguins?”

“Penguins? In the UK?”

“Ok, whales then.”

“We could pack it up, send it to President Trump, say it’s a gift from the queen?” Dan raises a brow.

“Be serious Dan. We can’t just dole it out. We have to destroy it once and for all.”

“OK, a guy can dream. That really only leaves one option,” Dan said solemnly.

“Yeah,” Phil said. “Ok. But promise me you won’t be grumpy.”

“I don’t have any control over that and you know it.”

Phil gnawed on his cuticle, worried out of his mind. “What if us getting lost in New Zealand led to someone getting married and now they have a baby and then the baby just...poof! Gone.”

“It’s only been a month and we didn’t really meet anyone that day. Let’s think. Did anything happen that we really shouldn’t undo?”

“No.” Phil said, looking into Dan’s eyes for some kind of reassurance. “I guess not. But we can’t know for sure.”

“And we also can’t let it stand. It’ll destroy us eventually Phil, you know it will. Or whoever comes across it.” Dan reached out and brushed Phil’s cheek with his fingertips. “It’ll be ok.”

With a deep breath, Phil reached into the bowl and Dan followed suit. They crossed arms and each one dabbed the bloody oil concoction onto the other’s forehead. Phil muttered a few words, his lip curled in disgust at the goo on his face.

“So mote it be.” Dan said and raised his left arm, hand open, into the air. The diamond came in from nowhere with a whoosh and landed in Dan’s hand like a fly ball. Wrapping both hands around it now, he spoke words he’d practiced since he was a child, in a language few people know. This magic is old.

A soft glow radiated from the diamond. It grew in intensity until it shone so bright neither Dan nor Phil could look right at it. Dan quickly moved to drop the diamond into the bowl and just as it touched the calf’s foot, it burst into a beautiful silver flame. Phil reached out and clasped his hands in Dan’s, joining in on the chanting. They looked at one another and Dan smiled.

“It’s ok Phil. I’ll see you on the other side.”

“I love you Dan.” But Dan didn’t respond before everything went dark. When he opened his eyes, he was sat in a circle of salt with Dan in front of him and a pretty disgusting bowl in the center. The diamond was gone, as if it had never existed.

“Hey.” Dan said.

“Hey. What were we doing?” Phil felt the goosebumps on his arms and had no idea how they got there.

“Apparently, we were casting a spell? A protection? I don’t remember.” Dan stood and stretched. “I can’t remember anything after this morning. I was on my laptop, scrolling. And you were…”

“Last thing I remember was winning at fortnite.”

“Oh yeah, remind me to tell about the gem I hid in the sofa.” Dan said, “Phil, I feel really weak and just weird. Do you think we demanifested something?”

“No. No way. We said we’d never do that again.” Phil stood and stretched. “Anyway, what would even be important enough to warrant that?”

“Dunno. That’s kind of the point.” Dan stood too and took the bowl in his hands. “We clearly summoned something. And I don’t see anything unfamiliar so…”

Phil knelt to brush some salt aside, muttering a few words to open the circle. “No point in worrying about something we’ll never know. I’m exhausted. Let’s watch Bake Off!”

“Ooh, ok.” Dan waggled his eyebrows, “in bed?”

“No, you perv. Let’s watch in the lounge. We never put that tv to use.”

Dan cleaned up the floor while Phil grabbed snacks and Ribena. Soon, they were snuggled up on the sofa covered in a furry blanket, watching the sweetest of shows on their big television.

“Phil?”

“What Dan.”

“I love you too.”

“Wait, what?”

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