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#He never does it again bc the experience was too bad. And also he could be assassinated very easily

soobnny · 10 months

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classmate au | sim jake

❝ i’m sorry we only got 26/30 on this worksheet ❞

jake…

oh jake.

student athlete and math genius jake

you’re in the same class but he feels so far because he hangs out with his rly pretty friends

u can only look from afar

he’s always a tiny bit late to class

always drawing attention to his pretty boy face 😞

at 7:30, the bell rings and classes start

at 7:31, jake walks into class late

but the teachers always give him a pass bc how could they not when he smiles at them like that and apologizes like that

even ur teachers are down bad

he probably becomes your class representative for that one strict teacher’s class bc they always have a soft spot for jake

u want the deadline of the homework extended? ask jake to message them

he sits in the middle seats

not too prim and punctual to be at the front

but still likes school enough not to completely goof around at the back

sometimes your math teacher lets you do quizzes and worksheets by pair

(it’s the only way some of you can get a passing grade)

by statistics and some type of sampling, you end up getting partnered up with jake

“hi, good morning,” he’d greet with his infamous smile

now you get why all the teachers swoon for him

he’s so cute. this is going to be a problem

this is going to be a BIG problem

you were already bad at math, and now there’s a big pretty distraction sitting next to you

though, tbh, you were also relieved when you heard your name with his bc he’s ltrly known as a math genius

he’s one of the students that teachers excuse for their math contests

and wait 😭 did he just say something to u? did he ask about a formula bc u honestly have no clue

“(name)?” he’d shake your shoulder gently and it’s enough to bring you back on earth

“sorry, did you ask something?”

“oh, i’m done … if u wanted to compare answers? or if u trust me enough?”

you trust him enough

he’s ltrly THE carry

jake will speedrun differential calculus like he’s writing the alphabet

uh oh.

why does he look so HOT with his pencil and the way he writes numbers

you’re going insane

you should never be paired with jake ever again

but by some twist of fate, you always end up as jake’s partner in numerous activities

lab work and experiments and communication reports?

“jake and (name),” the teacher would announce

ofc… typical of friends, they HAVE to push you around as you walk to your seat beside jake’s

while you’re of great help with anything else, you’re starting to feel bad about his literal carry in math tho

“are you sure it’s ok? i’m just rly horrible i’m sorry,” you’d apologize

he would just laugh and dismiss your concerns

“nooo, it’s okay. i’m fine! i can tell you didn’t get enough sleep last night”

(you spent the night binging a new show that came out)

your stomach doesn’t feel so good after that one.

who gave him the right to NOTICE things now???

when your teacher returns your paired worksheets, he has the GALL to apologize

a big fat 29/30 will be written on top and he’d say “oh i’m sorry we had one mistake 😕” like BOY SHUT UP !!!!

after your partner shenanigans, you’d start talking more in the classroom

he’d give u a fist bump if u bumped into each other in the hallways while walking with ur respective friend groups

sometimes even shout your name to get your attention only to wave at you

“why are you smiling like that?,” sunghoon would ask accusingly

and you know what? jake has no shame

“(name). she’s pretty cute, no?”

BYE absolutely no shame

so now, when he speedruns an activity, you’ll find him hovering around you until he starts to make conversation

if the teacher leaves early ?? suddenly he’s transported to the seat next to yours and flirting

being friends with jake is chaotic…. bc that would automatically mean being friends with HIS loud ass friends

pretty friends have upgraded to pretty LOUD friends

they’re so annoying too

“jake and (name), can you buy us water?”, heeseung would ask

WHY R U BUYING WATER FOR HEESEUNG

but jake’s already taking your hand and dragging you away bc he will take every opportunity to hang out with you alone

BTW computer science god idk i just got the vibes

during valentines that year, he codes you a little website please end me

mind you, you aren’t even together yet

he just codes for you as a friend 😂😂😂 as if anyone’s believing that

oh and he also avails those anonymous services so you’ll just be receiving flowers from the student council throughout the day

“oooooh, who are those from,” he would be smiling like it’d be so painfully obvious it’s from him

“do you like them?” NOOOOOOO he just wants to know ok!!! tell him you love them please

OK back to normal no more valentines

when class dismisses, you’d find him lounging around the basketball court with heeseung

sweaty….. wet hair…. oh dear

jake is a sight to see when he’s playing basketball

u usually sit at the bleachers anyway bc ur friends enjoyed watching

he is SOOOOO annoying esp now that you’ve grown closer over the months

he’d make stupid plays and draw attention to you 100%

“if i get this shot in, will you go on a date with me?”

cue the screams and the teasing and the fake vomiting as you’re pushed around

OFC he makes the shot

he’s sim jake, math genius AND student athlete

“so, tomorrow after class?”

“huh?? i thought you were joking??”

“what? no! have i not been obvious? i ltrly flirt with you evry chance i get??”

“well… idk! maybe you do that with everyone!”

“only you”

OK WISH I WERE YOU THEN 😒😒😒😒😒

note. credits to user @.luvknow for the layout of this post! let me know what you think! please discuss these with me i’m crazy

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shellxrls · 1 month

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okay to complete the trilogy

here’s how jj fucks

okay so we all know jj is an energetic person, and this only escalates in bed.

he has ridiculous stamina and an even more ridiculous refractory period. he will dump three loads and still be up for more.

he also does not gaf if it gets messy.

he loves to feel in control, I mentioned this with rafe but for him it’s slightly different. he’s much less mean about it. Rafe sees it as a power trip whereas jj sees it as like “helping” in a way.

for me specifically sometimes I just need to turn my brain off and that’s exactly where sex with jj comes in best.

he’s not soothing like John b is, he just does not stop. and that fucking works.

he also very much knows what he likes, and will always make sure he gets that, but he’s also realllyyy good at making sure the pleasure is mutual.

he never had an off day when it comes to giving pleasure, he may but a dumb fuck, but he does know how a girls (and a guys I can’t even lie to you) body works.

he loves giving backshots! if he could choose one sex position for the rest of his life it would be having me face down ass up.

he goes fast and hard, and he’s a grunter. Always with the little punched out “uh, uh, uh”’s and it’s so so hottttt.

skin slapping and bedpost banging are the primary sounds heard other than disgustingly shameless moaning.

jj is a shameless moaner and he made me one too the little cunt.

if I’m not loud enough for his liking or if I’m tryna quiet myself down he will dirty talk the noises out of me.

he genuinely said “lemme hear those pretty noises mama, yeahhhh that’s it.” And I’m never. ever recovering.

he’s not into any kinks that involve deliberate injury for pleasure. like slapping or choking, stuff like that he hates in bed. simply because his at home life is quite unstable and he just can’t imagine ever doing that to someone he loves cause he knows how it feels. even if it’s consensual on the receiving side he just absolutely cannot bring himself to do it. As a very open and experimenting person in bed, choking, slapping anything of that type of action he absolutely refuses and honestly I get that. He also refuses any type of noncon.

however he can spank. though only EVER does it when he’s really mad or riled up, and even then he is so so so attentive. always checking in after every hit just to make sure it’s not becoming too much.

he is also very adamant about safe words. always having a safe word and action and always checking through them and agreeing on them before we do anything that involves deliberate injury or just anything particularly rough in general.

also makes sure to give very good aftercare after spanking or a particularly rough night. LOTS of kisses and praise cause he would absolutely eat away at himself if he thought I was feeling neglected or bad about myself cause of something he’d done. especially in a setting as vulnerable as that.

and he’s also very good and communication which surprised me. again he’s very adamant about never hurting the people he loves, especially with the way he grew up. if I’ve suggested something he doesn’t want to do for that reason he’s very good at voicing it and honestly I’m glad bc I would never want to make him uncomfortable.

he’s also v open about sex, and is always totally there to talk about it or hear new suggestions or anything that I need to talk about he will.

he is very into butt stuff!!! I am his anal princess I cannot even begin to lie to u. he definitely has not bought me as many butt plugs but you bet I’m gettin a nice one he saved up for every Valentine’s Day cause he’s jst a lover boy to his core <33 and butt stuff <333

he’s mostly into giving praise but sometimes if he’s particularly wound up a little bit of degradation is sprinkled in. again is very thorough with aftercare after the fact of these situations.

he’s also such a munch. like the munchiest munch in munchland. he owns a t-shirt that says “I ❤️ eating pussy” and wears it on a regular.

he knows just how to work a pussy with his mouth and its IMMACULATE!!! he can also eat ass too omg.

he lovesss using toys. most guys see toys as a competition, but not jj. this man knows what’s up. he has a whole ass collection of random ass toys laying around and somehow at some point they all get used.

his fav combination when I’m tired is being four fingers knuckles deep in me with a vibrator to my clit and ohmygollygoshgoodness. deceased.

he’s really into tired / sleepy sex too. though he’d never do anything sexual while I was asleep because as previously stated, this man does not do any type of noncon.

but like I say if one of us wakes up in the middle of the night then it’s sleepy, sloppy, tired messy sex and ughh <333

he also loves cockwarming mmh. well put a movie on and I’ll jst sit on his cock and it’s sooo..

loves being sucked off <3 and he has such a pretty dick too. uncut but he actually likes to shave around there. such a perfect pink tip like I can’t even it’s the prettiest thing. can taste putrid though if I’m not careful.

he likes to have his balls played with / sucked on.

and PISS KINK!!! omg he’s jst gross ab it it’s so hot. makes me grind on his thing when I need to piss just to make me lose control and :(((

also on another note he does not gaf if I’m on my period. a true soldier is not afraid to get his sword bloody (I saw someone else on their blog say this and have honestly just adopted the phrase cause it makes me giggle)

I think this is everything but I’m literally so tired right now, if there’s anything I’ve forgotten I’ll js put it in a different ask <3

- rafe shifter

i’m posting this rn cuz everyone wants it !! i don’t have time to individually respond but trust i WILL add onto this post later with my own thoughts. ty anon for sending this in and taking time to explain every detail <3 !!

#asks.ᐟ ⋆｡˚𖦹 #;rafe shifter #;prompts #jj maybank prompt #jj maybank x reader smut #jj maybank smut #jj maybank imagine

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inchidentally · 5 months

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ok it's been a while since I did a big weird dumb emotional parasocial Lando post - this tangent being based on this photoset by Audrey/landoom

bc we have a perfect comparison for all three of Lando's teammates and oh yes I've got a lot of thoughts in my big dumb head !!

okay so

the carlando one is perfect bc this is what they do between race weekend duties, chatter away about this and that like they always have. but their dynamic is also always the same in the way they sit: Carlos is The Man with his manspreading and taking up space and he always leads their conversation, even doing that mock reprimanding when Lando is just plain wrong or too silly etc. of course Lando will always be The Boy bc Carlos got to know him before Lando's voice had changed and before Lando's body had even finished growing. their entire season spent together was Lando latching onto Carlos to cope with being too young for F1 and looking endlessly grateful that Carlos is a natural dab hand at media duties and the interminable periods of waiting on Thursdays, Fridays and even Saturdays. Carlos had also just been looking after another F1 baby in Max so playing the role of big brother and guardian was hardly new. but that's why Lando always has to squirm into whatever space is left (which fortunately he's very skilled at doing) when he's spending time with Carlos. even when they walk together, Carlos is striding and facing forward while Lando skitters at his side and twists himself to talk at him. Lando doesn't quite behave like the jittery toddler that he was with Carlos at first but he's also never going to be an equal to Carlos in that social way that Charles is. Carlos and Charles move in and around each other's space and are close enough in age for there to be nothing in it - Charles is another Man. Lando will always be baby brother wanting to hang with big brother with Carlos. big brother will always put his big arm out and keep little brother safe.

then the dando of it all that for me is equal parts hahahaaaaaaaa Daniel Ricciardo you got got at your own silly game - but also angsty as hell. bc Lando had to go through a very uncomfortable realization that Daniel was repeating the same kind of bromance dynamic with him that Daniel does with everyone, especially with his teammates… right at the same time that Daniel realized that for all his gay joking he'd caught some kind of baffling feelings for this strange little scrap of boy with the beautiful face and an intense charisma that came entirely from being vulnerable and sincere. I have a love/hate relationship with bromance content in general so I was like partly enjoying Daniel's Lando content suddenly becoming obsessive and transparently adoring, but also feeling (kind of) bad for him bc his idiot straight man bro-brain suffered a little bruise of queer longing in the shape of Lando that he'll never be rid of. because while Lando already knew he could make any man love him in a protective/guardian way, it was right during Daniel's tenure when Lando realized he could make any man actually fall in love with him - even without trying to. so there's DannyRic, playing up a fake version of the big brother thing Carlos has with Lando because he's too old to consider Lando one of his usual buddies, but then his trademark smile falters because he's jokingly getting Lando to wear his clothing line and jokingly tucking a flower behind Lando's ear and jokingly zooming in on Lando's glowing face again for a video... except he has to remind himself to force a bro-y laugh because it seems as if the sunlight is always shining out of Lando's face instead of the sky. and that's where their dynamic has lived ever since. Daniel wants to feel the sun again and forces out laughs to remind everyone, including himself and Lando, that it's cool and nothing serious. sometimes Lando laughs until it hurts and sometimes he feels out of it and can't bring himself to laugh back.

and like, knowing that that's been Lando's experience with teammates so far it's why we've all had this ??? !!! along with him when Oscar arrived packaged all alone, neat and tidy with a placid small smile on his face and half his career under professional management already. he's inscrutable but also so easygoing. he's friendly but he hardly ever touches another human being. he's polite but also firm in his feelings. he refuses to be anyone but himself but also gives absolutely nothing away. he must have shades and colors beneath all that pale skin because his eyes ignore everyone but the people he chooses as worthy of his time. with most people he's so ambivalent that he's barely even present but then Lando comes into his view and the fresh coffee color of Oscar's eyes fills back in. he doesn't blink enough around Lando and doesn't pay attention to much else when Lando is around. but he also won't capitulate and just be a bro or a bromance or some other easy entity. sometimes he takes a downright firm hand with Lando which is startling, but he just as suddenly will capitulate to whatever Lando wants which of course is delightful. and then he never takes away the attention that Lando lives off of like food and water. Lando realized at some point that he has to disappear so far from Oscar's field of vision for Oscar to not follow him or watch him. so why isn't Oscar being a big stupid simp like Daniel or a warm strong guardian like Carlos? why won't he just play ball during challenges and why won't he just let Lando know once and for all how exactly Oscar fits in with all the men who adore Lando because dammit he's the only one he can't categorize. he can't seem to find his footing and he can't even be mad about that because Oscar is so faithful and kind and unselfish and downright respectful and admiring in ways that other men and teammates never have been. how can you get mad at a boy for not easily defining what you are to him when he stays one step behind you at all times because you're the number one driver and he has no problem showing it - who hangs so far back at your home race fan stage that the host actually looks confused for a moment because she doesn't expect even the number two driver to look so happy about letting his teammate soak in all the glory on his own. why should it hurt that Oscar doesn't seem to view himself as a significant part of Lando's life when Oscar is so comfortable with that idea and so happy to just have Lando while he has him and not expect anything more?

and that's why we get Oscar as an unexpectedly intimate part of Lando's cameras. cameras are his creative expression - a cringe free space where he's safe to show the world he sees when he's the observer and not the observed. of course the little black heart under the photoset that starts with Oscar just stands for black and white photos of McLaren and the place he calls home. but Lando also agonizes over those posts and when you look at how he looks at Oscar and what they've been through and how steady and strong Oscar has been for Lando even in his rookie season, it felt a little prescient that Oscar would sign a contract immediately for as long as McLaren would give him. Oscar who has proven that he will determine his own future and that he will not let his time or his fate be in the hands of anyone else. that Oscar looked at McLaren and looked at Lando and said this is what he wants. McLaren has been Lando's home for so long and with that kind of proof from someone like Oscar, shouldn't it make sense that Oscar feels a lot like home. so he gets to be the first picture and the little heart sits directly beneath.

that's the thing for me about landoscar - we know so little about who Oscar is as a person on any deeper level apart from the people and things his eyes turn coffee colored for. we already all love Lando and the fact that Oscar's eyes open up around him is like a little window into who Oscar is down deep. firm but fair, faithful but not blind, adores too intensely to show it, effortlessly funny but controlled, withdrawn but not cold. we know Oscar is lovable and there's something so intensely upright about him.

so the one landoscar moment in this photoset is one of many times we see Lando taking a photo of Oscar's face. because he may not have an easy, handy way of defining what kind of friend/presence Oscar is in his life, he knows what Oscar has given him and Lando's camera is how Lando can reciprocate. he can grab Oscar in that moment, put him in his camera and look at him where he can understand him. sometimes post him publicly but most of the time will not.

#landoscar #I need a tag specifically for when I'm insane about them #also this is carlando and dando but I never know who in the tags will get mad at multishipping so #mine

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bee-a-garbage-shipper · 5 months

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trans!tim + pregnancy

tim, because he's an idiot with no self preservation, decides to stalk the red hood when he first shows up

he ends up finding one of red hoof's safe houses and decides that breaking in is a good idea

he's shifting through some paperwork when he's suddenly being pushed against the floor by a wall of muscle

obviously jason is pissed, he wants to know what his replacement is doing here

except tim is busy trying not to be to horny because yes the red hood is hot and yes this is like something straight out of one of his favorite fantasies but it is not the time

jason notices and decides to being an ass calling tim a slut

tim takes offense

"i'm still a virgin because i couldn't even sleep with my own girlfriend because i was too busy feeling guilty for being in love with someone else"

which causes jason to roll his eyes because tim could have easily pursued whoever it was instead

"sorry but i'm not into necrophilia"

which ok jay's happy the green is gone but kinda feels like an ass now but he also assumes that the person in question would want tim to be happy and move on and he tells tim this

"it's not, he didn't know, honestly he probably didn't even know i existed, i was to scared to talk to him before,"

and yeah jason really wants to end this conversation he doesn't want to feel bad for his replacement

he shifts around and tim reacts again

"you know if you're so desperate i don't mind helping"

tim definitely finds that idea appealing but argues because that's the right thing to do here

"why not, you can call out his name and live the fantasy and i get a nice warm hole"

and tim knows this is a bad idea he should be saying no and trying to get the fuck away from the crime lord but

"we never speak of this again"

obviously sex happens, jay does briefly pause when tim says jason but he's definitely telling himself it's a coincidence

(it's a common enough name so like, it could be)

afterwards they're both tired but then tim gets oracle reaching out via his previously off comms like

"i know you were busy but we've got a situation, mass arkham break out"

tim shelves the implication that at least barbara is aware of tim's very bad decision making skills and gets his ass up and out to help out

unfortunately for tim the night ends with him catching ivy and even more unfortunately she caught him too

thankfully it's just cuddle pollen so, bc he is the king of bad decision making and has 0 self worth, tim goes home and hides in his closet and rides it out so he doesn't bother anyone

problem is because of all this he forgot that he needs plan b

he remembers when his period doesn't show up

the 3 pregnancy test all say positive and tim is not looking forward to that conversation with red hood

not sure where it goes after that except both jason and tim get the terrible experience of finding out that tim did get to lose his first time to his first love

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callmehere-iwillappear · 11 months

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rec list (last updated: 10/22/23)

aka 'if you liked [cmh] you might also like [insert other really good fic here]' bc there are So Many amazing fics out there good lird

few things. first off if you see a disaster twins bias no you don't. second i tried to find all the authors' tumblrs but there were some i couldn't - if you know any of the ones i missed let me know!

aaand third, there are just. SO many good fics i ended up splitting things up. this is the rec post for multi chapter fics, here's the one shot rec post

Multichapter Fics

Complete

A Twin Thing (@minumi-chan)

Four times Donatello rejects Leo's notion of them being twins, and the once (and future) time he embraces it.

GOD THE TWINS EVER.... funny in parts but also hurts in the best possible way and thankfully has a happy ending to soothe the pain. i literally love them so much

Because We Could Not Stop For Death (@turtleinsoup)

After Leo dies, Donnie builds an android of his twin. After Leo dies, he comes back. He does. And Donnie will not ever let him go again.

very very very very VERY heavy please mind the warnings but god. god. another take on the 'leo dies in the prison dimension' concept that btw WILL make you cry. like a lot. absolutely incredible study of grief. i am never going to be the same person after reading this

coming right on back for you (@taizi)

Rise!Mikey’s portal in the prison dimension takes Leo a little bit farther than he meant for it to. 12!Mikey finds a familiar-looking stranger.

soooo full disclosure i haven't actually watched 2012 tmnt. that said even without that, this fic rules. incredibly soft and heartwarming. i love them

Corrupted Upgrade (@dandylovesturtles)

His brothers think they don't need him anymore? Well, fine. He doesn't need them either. The old Donatello is gone. He'll build a new one. One that will make them regret they ever threw him aside. Building things is what he's good at, after all.

i can't say too much without spoiling the twist, but oh MAN guys it's real good. come get your donnie hurt/comfort juice rn. also for a hurt/comfort fic it has NO RIGHT being so funny so often

Dimensions Apart & Home Again

"Who said I'm hiding?" Leo scoffs. Normally he wouldn't take such a sharp tone, but he's tired and not in the mood for what he feels to be an interrogation in his own bedroom. "You all know where I am. I live here, remember?" “Yeah, very funny. And you know where we live. But nobody's seen you for two weeks.”

ooohhh post movie hurt/comfort my beloved... leo is isolating and donnie kicks his ass. metaphorically. mostly. meanwhile raph and mikey are also having a certified Bad Time but it's okay they all get comfort by the end

Havoc, Thy Name is Donnie

Donnie accidentally turns himself into a child while experimenting with mystic power. It's cute until Donnie gets his hands on his older self's tech and then it's really uncute and Leo and S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. are having a heart attack.

child donnie is an absolute MENACE and it's INCREDIBLE. terrorizes leo. terrorizes shelldon. terrorizes some random criminals. terrorizes april. terrorizes draxum. all in the course of a single day. 12/10

how to get very good at juggling (@radishhqueen)

The Krang invasion put a couple of things in perspective for April. One of them was how much she wanted her parents to meet the Hamatos. The only difficult part is…getting her parents to meet the Hamatos.

the turtles meet april's parents! it goes... about as well as can be expected. REALLY good april centric post movie fic

little kid with a big death wish (@remedyturtles)

Leo's mind rebelled against the sensation. The heaviness burst into awareness, body, limbs, lungs, blinking. The middle distance he'd apparently been staring in focused. Leo was awake. Leo was aware. Leo was alive. Being alive wasn't something he thought he'd be.

genuinely don't think i could ever recommend this fic enough. mind the warnings as it does get very heavy but. god. idk how to express how much this fic means to me in just a few sentences but like. you'll understand if you read it (also for. an actual summary: post movie recovery fic with a side of extra leo)

Nothing Haunts Us (like the things we don't say)

The boys learn the hard way that truths can hurt. Well, some of them.

truth spellllll you love to see it! lotta post movie angst + some good comfort at the end + bonus the boys actually being emotionally vulnerable and talking about their issues (even if it's not 100% by choice)

Trial and Error (@apatheticrobots)

Leo ends up in the past. This changes some things.

YES the healing (well. eventually).... big fan of the leos' dynamic in this one. also that One Scene (the one with the animatic. if you know you know) gives me goosebumps EVERY time good god

Unfinished business

When one dies leaving something undone, there's a belief, that they do not go gentle into that good night. They linger on until they've finished what they couldn't while alive. And for four turtles, that business is using the Poltergeist movie as inspiration.

bad future ending but make it HILARIOUS. tldr the future turtles haunt the SHIT out of the krang. that's all i'm giving you because that's all you should need. they fucking rick roll them. please

Use Only For Intended Purpose (me!)

That's probably not how mind melds are supposed to work.

sorry for reccing my own fic do you still love me /j BUT FR if you like post movie disaster twins hurt/comfort with a side of dream sharing. i got u

Where in the World is Neon Leon?

Leo practices portalling on his own. This is not a good idea for many, many reasons.

set over the course of the show + the movie! aka leo trying so so hard to be seen as reliable and getting incredibly fucked up over it. also making new friends

write this down on my headstone (it wasn't what i hoped for) (@bottledovercast)

it’s as he drifts listlessly through the cold-as-shit hellscape that leo’s willing to admit, maybe this wasn’t what raph meant. aka: i do not believe for one second that there were No Problems in between getting leo out of the prison dimension and the final scene of the movie.

i genuinely do not know how to do this one justice with words. it's written impeccably and the hurt/comfort is just. chefs kiss. please read it (+ has a sequel now that's also absolutely incredible!)

In progress

At My Worst (@teainthesnow)

Future Leo ends up back in time, stuck in the body of his younger self, who is still conscious but trapped within his mind.

genuinely LOVE this concept like there's a lot of (really good) future leo goes back in time fics but i'm pretty sure this is the only one i've read with them sharing a body? god the dynamic is. SO good. one of my fave future leo + present leo dynamics ever tbh. just. chefs kiss

I May Be Invisible, But I Still Look Good (@dandylovesturtles)

Leo is cursed by a mystic whatever thingy. But don't worry guys, he's totally got this! Getting back into his body? Easy peasy. (He hopes it will be easy peasy.)

will smith poses fellow ghost(ish) leo fic my beloved! ngl this one kinda has a special place in my heart so i May be biased BUT even aside from that it's just. so good. the premise is so interesting and it's written super well and in character and also i would like to give leo a hug PLEASE GOOD GOD

I'm Sorry, Teenage Mutant What Now? (@tangledinink)

When Hamato Yoshi is presented with the chance to return to the surface with his sons and give them a 'normal' life as humans, he takes it. He didn't think that they would forget about that whole turtle thing. But it seems kind of too late to tell them now. Surely they won't find out any other way, right?

human au! ... kind of. actually brooches au but they THINK they're human which is fine until, y'know, it's not. currently in the 'not' part of the fic and it's just going really great for everyone! you love to see it

In Which Donnie and Leo Make Themselves Everyone Else's Problem in an NYC That Isn't Even Their Own

It was a huge mistake on the Kraang's part to kidnap the wrong half of the wrong set of brothers and leave behind two very worried twins. And not just any twins. The disaster twins.

another crossover with 12tmnt which. again i have not seen, but like. this fic is just. REALLY good. it's set pre movie so there's not that trauma, it's literally just the twins fucking the 12 kraang up and living up to their nickname while the 12 turtles (and rise mikey and raph) look on in horror

i think i would prefer the prison dimension (@purplecatghostposts)

Leo gets sent to the Kraang Apocalypse Future that he really didn’t want to think about. Future Leo, Mikey, and Donnie are absolutely baffled by him. Nobody is happy.

you've heard of future leo in the present, now get ready for: present leo in the future! he gets dragged into the apocalypse instead of getting pulled out of the prison dimension back to his brothers and boy he is, understandably, Not Thrilled!

Last Grain of Sand in the Hourglass (@last-hourglass)

The one where the Hamato family is freaking the fuck out, Leo is lost in the Prison Dimension, and a very-time-displaced Leonardo refuses to leave his younger self behind. (Oh, and there may be some mystic hauntings afoot. You know, the usual result of messing with the space-time continuum.)

future leo gets saved while present leo stays in the prison dimension! there's A Lot going on in this one and half of it is BIG spoilers but just. oh my god. this shit is SO well written i am eating it

Mikey's Jam-Packed, Guaranteed to Get Donnie's Memory Back, Friendship Tour!

Donnie wakes up without his memory one day and everyone panics. They're just going to have to jog his memory the old-fashioned way! Through the power of friendship! [And a small (I was wrong. A very large) degree of violence and shenanigans]

donnie gets amnesia and SO SO MANY shenanigans ensue. also a tiny bit of angst but it's fine

Minor Interference (@bambiraptorx)

The turtles accept Draxum's offer to train them. Little does he know that they're only going to use it mess with him.

haha draxum accidental dad moments... well okay not entirely just yet but he's getting there! the turtles are PEAK teenager literally just causing problems on purpose and it's incredible

Mutant Ninja Midlife Crisis (@mutantninjamidlifecrisis)

In the midst of attempting to make peace with his death at the hands of the Krang, Master Leonardo is suddenly yeeted over two decades into the past, courtesy of his little brother.

YEAAHHH another future leo fic! mans gets dropped into the past and IMMEDIATELY kidnapped and brainwashed so things are going great (it's fine he gets better. you know how it is)

odd man out (@threestripeslider)

The one where Future!Leo somehow managed to luck out on a one in a million mere millisecond chance of a freak glitch in the space-time continuum that sends him back into the present, where the Invasion has been successfully driven back. And it looks like it was a one-way ticket travel.

DAD FUTURE LEO MY BELOVED.... he really took one look at these kids and said is anyone else gonna give them a third (3) dad and did not wait for an answer. also big fan of casey's high school adventures LMAO

Power Up

Leo also gets healing hands like his 2k12 counterpart. Sadly, they end up backfiring on him. Who needs to know though?

leo taking 'it's not about me' to the extreme. good god please get this kid some therapy and self worth. the AGONIES

The Lemonade Leak (@turtleinsoup)

The one in which Leo can’t sleep without his swords, because there is a monster in his room, pretending to be Donnie.

oh man. oh MAN. legit one of my fave fics out there. i'm not usually a big thriller person but this one GETS ME + the way the author writes the different perspectives is just. chefs kiss. genuinely has me on the edge of my seat every single update

The Neon Void

Five years. It's been five years. Hamato Leonardo was back. But he was no longer who he once was.

krangified leo! ... sort of. absolutely delicious angst and also i want to rattle leo's brothers. TALK TO EACH OTHER

Three-Sided Coin (@leglessstreetlights)

Highly self-indulgent fic where I put Leo, Future!Leo, and TurtleTot!Leo in the same room until they hug

what the description says! room is a bit of a stretch and present leo is fresh out of the prison dimension So There's That. some really sweet moments in this one though. tiny leo my beloved

this year we lost our dear brother leonardo

The aftermath of the Krang, and of pulling Leo out of the portal. 90% comfort and silly banter.

this is a series not a single wip but i'm saying it counts because i love it a lot. hope this helps <3 yeah what it says on the tin. immediately post movie family hours you love to see it

Times Five

Leo gets struck by a mystic beam that splits him into five parts of himself; literally.

god the TWIST. still losing my mind over it. the whole thing honestly. lotta dealing with leo's complicated emotions about the invasion and himself, really really good tbh

Write Me Well, My Love, Write Me Weird

When stories start popping up on various media outlets of the Turtleman, New York Cities own personal cryptid, most of the world shrugged. To the citizens of New York? fear, excitement, adoration for this odd and lovable creature. Everyone is quick to share stories and memories of their encounters, much to lament of Turtleman's older brother.

leo and donnie get spotted by humans (more than once) and said humans post about it on social media, as humans tend to do. raph is Not Thrilled. angst (and eventual comfort) ensues

#talk tag #fic recs #sorry abt my commentary i am NOT a film critic and there IS a reason for that </3 #kinda bounced between summarizing and just. going 'eating this eating this' and shit like that. u know how it is #anywayy read these fics. holding you all at gunpoint /j #not fic related #MAYYY update this and the other post bc there are 100% some i missed. just went through my subscriptions and marked for later and bookmarks #but i def feel like theres some i missed somehow. augh #but i dont wanna sit and stare at this forever agonizing over if im forgetting any SO. just shoving it at u all. enjoy

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alexxncl · 1 year

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obey me hcs (mainly the brothers)

masterlist | more drabbles/hcs | pt 2

keep in mind my mc is black lol

slight nsfw warning ?? it's just asmo shape-shifting

also this is so long i apologize

first and foremost, SIMEON AND DIA AFROLATINO KINGS

the two of them and mams always help mc with wash day

barbatos also does bc he helps dia with his hair and will silk press the FUCK out your hair

mams can do locs and helped the angels in the celestial realm who had them with their retwists and detox

mc convinced him to start a business on the side bc they could tell how much he loved doing their hair

beel loves kids and they love him, he's a jungle gym

levi used to (and still does) go mute when he's overwhelmed, luci and mammon taught themselves sign language in case they need to communicate with him

luci was ridiculously overprotective of the brothers when they fell, but the longer they stayed in the devildom, it was less obvious bc his pride didn't allow him to show those emotions outright

asmo can change his genitalia at will depending on his partner's needs/desires

all the brothers are some sort of neurodivergent, and so is (my) mc

this is kinda canon but all of them are queer and luci is the only cis one out of all the brothers

mc helped them become more comfortable with stimming both in the main tl and in nb bc they do it a lot themself

mams, barbatos, and luci are the best to go to when your anxiety gets bad bc they all have it and know how to handle it best/take your mind off of it

idk if this is canon or not but luci advocated for a hybrid-like rad so levi would be able to take some of his classes virtual when his anxiety gets too bad

mc has touched everyone's tails/wings out of pure curiosity once everyone was comfortable enough around them

mams always carries around crow food and birds are almost always following him around bc of it

luci and dia fucked before the fall.

mc started singing wade in the water whenever luci made them do shit and now mams does it too

mc rarely left their room after the lesson 16 incident and everyone but belphie checked up on them

lucifer forbade him from going anywhere near them but he still tried to at least see if they were ok

lucifer is *almost* physically incapable of apologizing bc of his sin

mams rarely uses his powers to their fullest extent, he did it once not too long after they fell and vowed to never do it again out of fear of hurting the people he cared about

satan's powers are equally fueled by wrath and grief

satan was with lucifer from his creation, god didn't wanna make both of them bc he knew satan would be the catalyst for a war

asmo and solomon almost dated but asmo pushed himself away bc he's scared of committment

levi had to physically hold mammon back from *seriously* hurting belphie after the lesson 16 incident

solomon is lilith's son

solomon is actually a decent cook when he doesnt try to experiment...but he always tries to experiment

magic can't even fix whatever he makes when he cooks

simeon can't see for shit but never wears his glasses

beel had and still has a lot of body image issues, his gluttony worsened them and he works out nonstop to cope

belphie listens to white noise on the rare occasion of him not being able to sleep

simeon would've fallen with luci if he found out what was happening and had more time to think, part of the reason why he was so ok with being demoted

dia wanted to be the closest to belphie when they first fell bc of their shared interest in humans and was hurt when belphie was standoffish

luke will be one of the most powerful, if not the most powerful, angels in history

i feel like he was a human and he died when he was really young and became an angel after

mephisto is a kpop stan and ults stayc

he compensates for his low self esteem and jealousy of luci and dia's friendship with the newspaper position

he also has a crush on both of them but wont admit it to himself

raph scolded the brothers so much bc they were his favorites, he didn't want them getting caught by god

felt guilty for letting the brothers fall alone, but not nearly as guilty as simeon

thirteen is a lesbian and i love her and we're married <333333

she hates solomon bc he was one of her assignments and she failed bc he's immortal

familial issues bc of the failure, she's the baby of the family but was still outcast

mc taught mams how to play spades and he's terrible at it

i'm so sorry 😭

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kyriethesquishysquid · 7 months

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Betrayal Never Felt So Good (König/Fem!Reader) Chapter 6

You can find Chapter 1 here, Chapter 2 here, Chapter 3 here, Chapter 4 here, and Chapter 5 here!

Word count: ~6.5K

Rating: Mature

Pre-A/N: Thank you guys so much for reading and even commenting! You have been so dang sweet and I appreciate every single one of you. Your comments make my days so much better and help me stay on track with wanting to create. <3

Also, I got a DM suggesting I put the translations in italics next to the German- would that be more helpful? I'm totally okay with doing so if it'll help everyone be able to read it more fluidly!

A/N: Some soft morning smut with our beloved turning into some rough ass sex?? It’s more likely than you think! Come on, who wouldn’t hear that sleepy voice first thing in the morning and NOT think of sex?? König is the duality of man, so soft and gentle and yet also the most domineering brutal man. We love it. Continued COD and military inaccuracies galore.

TW: We get a little into reader’s backstory with allusions to a negative childhood but nothing too in-depth yet! I will add triggers for that topic when it comes up! Smut! Soft sweet smut, rough dominating smut, and some deep-ass emotions. Breeding kink - yes, again, I promise it’ll go away for a while after this chapter lol- Unprotected sex, creampie, multiple orgasms, squirting, oral after creampie, MASSIVE overstimulation and forced (consensual) orgasms, dom/sub, dirty talk, size kink, overly powerful!König & weak!reader. Pet names (in English and German), bad German translations bc I’m STILL a lame monolingual American, and STILL no beta because we die like jackass Graves.

Crappy Translations:

Maus - Mouse

Mein schatz - My darling

Meine leibling - My love

Süßes mädchen- Sweet girl

Scheiße - Shit

Du kleine Füchsin - You little vixen

Scheiße, du fühlst dich so gut an - Fuck, you feel so good

Und ich liebe dich, mein Schatz - And I love you, darling

You weren’t sure what time it was when you woke but it was still dark when your eyes fluttered open, though the greyness of the morning sky was beginning to filter through the nylon of the tent. It was calmingly quiet in the forest around you, signaling that the others were still asleep, and a smile crossed your face. You could sleep in. That was a nice feeling. With a little stretch, you arched back only to smack something hard, said obstacle groaning as a heavy arm slung across your waist.

“Stop moving, maus, s’too early.”

Fuuucckk. König’s voice was pure fucking sex in the mornings. You’d always heard about the morning voice phenomena but you never really got to experience it before those first few nights with him. If you could, you’d record it and set it as your alarm, just to hear it again and again until you were able to have the real thing every morning. Reaching down, you gently rubbed up and down his arm, taking in the tickle of his arm hairs against your skin until he groaned and jerked you back into him. His groan immediately sent your thoughts from soft morning cuddles to something much darker as you felt the familiar hardening of his cock.

“Good morning to you too,” you teased quietly, slowly shifting your hips against his.

Though he didn’t react at first, it didn’t take long for you to hear his breaths coming out heavier as his dick pushed harder into your ass, as if instinctively searching for release. A well-placed arch of your hips was all it took, a low warning growl rumbling against the top of your head and fingers digging into the soft flesh of your stomach as he thrust forward.

“Du kleine Füchsin.”

“Hmm?” you asked back.

The silky fabric of your nightie was suddenly bunched up above your hips before you felt his big hand cup your sex.

“I said, you are such a little vixen,” he moaned quietly, sending shivers up your spine as his middle finger slid between your lips, “Ooh, you are already so wet, schatz. Does my sweet girl need me?”

“Ah, ha- fuck!”

“Shh, shh, shh, I’ve got you, leibling,” he purred lowly, “Don’t worry your pretty little head.”

All hopes of replying were thrown out the window when he started stroking soft circles around your clit. Without a second thought, you moved your top leg back over his with a low moan, symbolically opening yourself to him as your eyes shut once more.

“Mmm, good girl.”

Your heart lurched in your chest and you decided immediately that him uttering those words first thing in the morning should be illegal, lest you have a heart attack or your ovaries explode. Reaching between your bodies, you were happy to find that he’d removed his pants in the night and his boxer briefs were the only barrier between his cock and your hand.

He chuckled lowly in his throat as you struggled with the underwear and finally helped remove the annoying cloth, muttering, “You’re so impatient in the mornings.”

“Only- Only impatient when it involves delaying you fucking me,” you shot back breathlessly.

The way his dick flexed in your hand at that had you grinning until he smacked it away and palmed your ass, gently guiding your top leg up more so he could easily line up his cock with your entrance until he froze.

“Wait, I should prep-”

“I’m fine, promise, just want you to fuck me,” you cut him off, “Bitte.”

A wiggle of your hips had you both gasping as it pushed his head hard against your cunt. He let out a grunt of understanding and then his hips suddenly snapped forward, burying him in with just one motion. The cry you let out was embarrassingly loud but before you could cover your mouth, his arm curled up under your head and his hand was there instead, two fingers slipping into your mouth while the remaining few pulled your jaw closed around them.

“You need to be quiet, maus, can’t have them waking up and ruining our fun,” he demanded, amusement obvious in his sleepy tone as he thrust forward again, causing you to moan around his fingers.

As you instinctively began to suck on his digits in hopes of keeping yourself silent, he let out a broken swear. The hand between your thighs once more took up their gentle caresses and you nearly came on the spot. It took everything in you not to reflexively bite on his fingers when he prodded the back of your mouth but you just barely managed, a muffled gag followed by a heady moan vibrating through your throat earnestly.

“Ja, that’s it, suck on my fingers just like that, liebling. Fuck, look at you,” he crooned gently, “It’s like you were made for this, to take me just like this. Isn’t that right? Hmm?”

You managed a weak nod but not much else, your brain lost in the fog of the orgasm building steadily in your core. The sounds of him fucking your dripping wet heat were nothing less than pornographic, slick and loud with each thrust of his cock. It was so much different than last night, softer, sweeter, with the haze of sleep still clawing at the edges of your subconscious. You couldn’t resist grinding back into him as he quickened his calloused fingers across your sensitive nub and whimpered softly.

“That’s right. My perfect little cock hungry slut, made just for me and only for me. Scheiße! Du fühlst dich so gut an.”

That caught your attention, walls instinctively clamping down around his dick and eyes rolling back. God, this man knew each and every dirty little thing you craved before you even did, and you fucking loved it. As much as you wanted the moment to last forever, you knew logically that everyone else would be waking soon, and it wasn’t like he was giving you much option with the way his cock rubbed against your sweet spot with every rock of his hips.

“Fuck, you squeeze me so perfectly, maus,” he groaned brokenly, “I’m getting close, I need you to come for me.”

That time you gave an emphatic nod, licking up between his fingers before sucking on them faster. Your nails found his bare hip behind you and held on for dear life as you felt that familiar spark taking hold, teetering so close to the edge that it hurt until his fingers started fucking your mouth. The double stimulation was too much. Free hand slapping over his, you cried out muffled screams behind his hand when it hit, pleasure only increasing as you clenched down around him. Every thrust sent you spiraling farther and farther from reality, lost in your own mind, drunk on ecstasy and everything König.

“Scheiße, Scheiße, mein Gott!”

It wasn’t seconds later before he was whimpering your name, body shaking against yours while his cock throbbed with every shot of his cum and your hips rocked into his. Your motions were stopped with a heavy hand and he snapped your name in warning. A playful smile came to your face when he shuddered as your walls fluttered around him again.

“You are trouble,” he hissed.

You groaned quietly when he finally pulled out and released your mouth.

“If every morning starts like that, I’m defecting from Graves as soon as this is over,” you joked quietly.

He didn’t respond but before you could figure out why, you were suddenly shoved from your side onto your back, your giant of a lover climbing between your legs and lying on his stomach. Your thighs, strong as they were, were no match for him when he forced them apart and began to place soft kisses across your mound.

“Oh my god, what are-” your words fell prey to a wrecked little cry when you felt his tongue lapping at your clit.

“We’ve got time,” he panted against your skin, “Nobody is up yet.”

“B-But- oh fuck.”

Brows furrowing, you let your head fall back into the blankets and covered your mouth as a broken sob fled your lips. It almost hurt, how good the overstimulation felt. Your face flushed dark as you realized there was no doubt he would come in contact with his own cum, as the fluids practically gushed out of your cunt with each pulse of your walls, and yet he didn’t stop. Didn’t it bother him?

Two thick fingers easily slid into your core, tearing a whine from you as you pointlessly fought and tried to rip away from his hold. It felt sinful, knowing his fingers were essentially just shoving his cum back inside you with every motion, and his words from last night reverberated loudly in your mind.

“Mine to love, and protect, and fuck, and breed.”

“J-Jesus fucking-”

“I’m not stopping until you cannot stand,” he retorted, eyes wild with hunger as you met them, “I went too long without you and I don’t know how long it will be until I can have you like this again. I’m going to make every- second- count. Understood?”

You knew there was no arguing with him. Not that you really wanted to anyway, not with the way his fingers stuffed you so perfectly. You knew this was his way of checking in, giving you the option to say no and he would stop, but fuck was the alternative too tempting.

“O-Okay,” you whined quietly.

Despite the way you bit your lips, muffled little squeaks of pleasure sounded like screams in the still quiet morning. Lips met your leg gently, quickly giving way to a hot tongue and sharp teeth as he bit and soothed little marks all down your thighs.

“Before we leave here, I am taking a video,” he huffed out, voice tense and low against your skin, “Of you just like this, spread out all perfect for me, so soft and beautiful, making those sweet little noises.”

Any chance you had of replying was demolished the moment you felt his tongue between your folds again, finding your throbbing clit with deadly accuracy and tearing a shrill cry from your throat. There was no keeping quiet with the sudden flush of bliss that raced through your limbs. Toes curling into his back and fingers tearing at the blankets, your body arched violently into his touch, earning a guttural moan from the man buried face deep in your thighs as he shoved you back onto the ground.

“S-Sh-Fuck, König, please!” you squeaked, twisting violently in his hold.

You tried your damndest to escape the overwhelming sensations but he was having none of it, his arm reaching between your thighs to pin you down with a forearm to your stomach and his elbow and hand bracing your thighs apart. There was nothing you could do, no matter how hard you pushed or pulled or wiggled. König had you in his capable clutches at his mercy. It was like he couldn’t even feel the way you kicked at him and fuck did you love it.

“Please, please, I- I can’t-!”

His only response was the demonic growl that rumbled against your cunt as his lips wrapped around your tender nub and sucked, his fingers taking back up their previous motions in your core.

Pleasure became pain and back around again as you stared down at him through teary eyes. It should have been terrifying. It should have made you second-guess trusting him so much, and regret not establishing limits. And yet, you weren’t scared, or upset. If anything, you were in awe of him and his strength, his abilities; how, despite instinctively hating being weak, you loved that he took charge of what he wanted.

As tears leaked down your cheeks, all you could do was watch on in reverie as the blonde-haired god of your new world worshiped you with a devotion previously unknown to mankind. The way his head moved as he suckled and nibbled on your clit was too much to handle, your body falling back in mortifying defeat as he pulled out whine after whine, dragging you toward another high as if it were as easy as breathing.

“König, please, too much,” you whimpered, shoving at his head.

You nearly cried at the loss of his fingers when he suddenly snagged your wrist away, pussy throbbing at the feeling of slick transferring from his skin to yours.

“I am not done, maus,” he growled, finally giving your body a slight reprieve as he lifted up just enough to pin you in place with heavy eyes, “Now, hands above you... Ja, just like that. Good girl. Stay like that until I am finished with you, schatz.”

Without warning, he went right back down. Three fingers slipped in this time, the stretch still nothing compared to his cock but the surprise made you clench down on him as he toyed with your clit mercilessly. Your arms twitched above you, practically aching to grab him or shove him away. It was a mind fuck. Technically you could move, your arms were free, but he had ordered you to stay. Oh, but it was so damn hard when you felt the way his fingers pressed right up against your spot at the same time as he pushed down on your belly.

“K-König, please!” you keened, unsure exactly what you were asking for.

Did you want him to stop? Did you want him to make you come again? It was all too much and your head was floating away with every thrust of his digits pushing you higher and higher, that familiar knot growing impossibly tight.

“Mmmm, that’s it, kleines,” he moaned, “That’s it, good girl, come for me.”

Just the change in temperature of his breath across your slick nub was enough to throw you over.

“Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck-”

You barely registered your body being bent before his hand slammed over your mouth, his body holding yours up at an awkward angle that only made the pressure of his fingers in your cunt feel ten times stronger. It was hard to breathe and you could feel the sweat pooling across your forehead and chest, but god you wouldn’t stop him even if you were going to suffocate.

You felt a flash of confusion when he lifted back up onto his knees but it was easily quelled when he began to shift you around, directing you onto your side until your top thigh rested over his as he straddled the other.

“Been dreaming of taking you like this for some time now but I was worried you couldn’t take it. Do you think you can, kleines?” he asked warmly, running his cockhead against your lips teasingly.

Oh but why was that so fucking hot? The allusion of being breakable; the knowledge that he could utterly decimate you with his size.

“God yes,” you groaned throatily, wiggling in his hold eagerly.

As he slowly pushed into you, your eyes rolled into the back of your head out of sheer disbelief. You blindly reached out for him and held onto his wrist, relishing in the grounding touch as he sent your senses into overload. He was always big but in this position… it was earth-shattering.

“Are you okay, maus?” he questioned breathlessly.

“Fuck yes!” you gasped, “So okay!”

His answering chuckle was dark and delicious. Fingers dug hard into your thigh and held you in place as he finally slammed his hips into yours, shoving his cock so deep that you would have flown away in shock if not for his embrace.

He was right to be worried, you realized, his large size overwhelming and borderline painful even as it sent you immediately into another screaming orgasm, barely muffled by his massive hand.

“Oh, coming again for me already, süßes mädchen ?” he growled, “Does it feel that good?”

Brows furrowing in concentration, you whimpered out a mess of unintelligible noises mixed with his name and “Don’t stop”.

“Fuuuck,” he moaned deeply, “What a good little slut you’re being for me.”

It was funny. There were so many kinks you didn’t know you were into before König, like being called a slut for example. Or were you into them because they were with him? That would be hard to decipher, really. Your train of thought was abruptly derailed when he released his hold on your leg and landed a sharp smack on your ass, ripping a hiss from deep in your chest.

“‘M gonna cum, maus, you going to take it all again?”

Face reddening at the mental image of how messy you were going to be after it all, you barely managed a little nod before he was slamming ruthlessly into you. Gone was the care of being heard. All that mattered was the little world the two of you created.

“You like when I come inside you, don’t you?” he panted weakly, a devastated whine escaping beneath his words, “My sweet little breeding maus. So- Scheiße- So perfect for me.”

A little giggle escaped before you whined out, “Could ask you the same.”

Another, much harder, smack landed on your ass and you instinctively jerked from the stinging pain, crying out as it only served to shove him deeper.

“I asked you a question, klienes.”

Shivers ran down your spine in delight and you quickly replied, “Yes, sir! I love feeling you come inside me. I love being so full it runs out!”

The way his fingers dug into your ass cheek and the throaty groan he gave in reply was well worth any embarrassment your words caused.

“Me too,” he moaned brokenly, “Me too.”

With one last powerful thrust, he buried his cock as far as possible in your core with a gravelly moan of your name that set off one final rush of ecstasy, your head falling back and your mind going completely blank. You felt everything and yet nothing, your senses seemingly no longer connected to your brain.

There was a comfortable silence in the air as you both caught your breath, his fingers stroking wherever they could reach on your body until he finally pulled out. A weak whimper escaped your lips as he gently laid your leg down before collapsing on the sleeping bag next to you. You weren’t sure how long you laid there for but, somewhere in the back of your mind, you registered that he was moving around after a while and heard the crackle of a plastic bottle. A low groan escaped your parted lips when he forced you onto your back but he shushed you softly.

“I’m going to clean you up, schatz, I’m sorry if you’re sensitive.”

With a little nod of understanding, you braced for the touch but a little hiss still escaped as you felt the wet fabric come into contact with your thigh. His gentle apology took some of the sting out of the shock as he carefully wiped your thighs clean, warning you before doing the same with your overly sensitive cunt. True to his word, his touch was purely clinical, feather-light touches and little murmurs of praise as he worked until you were clean. The sound of the cloth hitting the side of the tent was the only precursor to him collapsing onto the ground next to you, his arms wrapping you up and tugging you in close until you were forehead to forehead with him.

After a few moments, you forced your eyes open, unable to stop the little smile that snuck out when you found his beautiful icy blues staring back. Pure adoration shone through his gaze as he reached out, fingers tracing along your soft jawline gently before he grabbed your chin and tilted your head back, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead, nose, then lips.

“I’m surprised you stayed,” you whispered softly when he pulled back.

His chiseled features were still soft with sleep and you couldn’t resist reaching out to rest your hand on his cheek, thumb stroking along the short blonde hairs starting to grow back. König was always beautiful, but there was something almost glowing about him in the mornings. You wanted to frame him and stare at him forever.

He gave a non-commital noise suddenly, drawing your eyebrows up in confusion only to earn a warm smile from the Austrian.

“I love you, meine schatz,” he rumbled lowly, “If I do not have to sleep without you, I am not going to.”

“And if they notice-”

“Then they will keep their mouths shut,” he retorted, eyes sending a ruthless glare toward the tent door before softening back on you, “Horangi and Amy will say nothing. Max will-”

At that, you gasped out and smacked his arm gently, earning a shocked look from the big man.

“Max!” you hissed back, “Why didn’t you tell me he was one of yours?!”

There was a flash of guilt in his expression before he quickly smoothed it over, a heavy sigh leaving his lungs.

“I- I want to keep you safe, liebling, and sometimes that means keeping information away from you,” he explained softly, “If Max were to be found out, you would truly have no information to offer them and you would be safe from any repercussions.”

Rolling your eyes, you nudged him and muttered, “I love that you’re so protective but you have to learn to trust me.”

“I do trust you, and I need you to trust me to do what is best for you. Everything I do is with your best interests in mind.”

“I know, I know,” you sighed before assuring him, “I’m not mad. I just- I want to be a part of decisions that affect me, you know? I am a fully functioning adult that can take care of herself.”

The look of disbelief that flooded his face sent your mouth open in shock. No way. He was not about to-

“Are you sure about that, schatz? You seem to be a magnet for trouble. I have never known a woman who trips or runs into walls as much as you do. You practically need protection from yourself sometimes,” he teased, “And let’s not even start on the serious troubles you end up in.”

Pouting your lips out, you scooted back to attempt to make room, only for his arms to tighten around you and draw you right back in. You were in no way shape or form able to resist the pull, still extremely boneless from your recent activities. Any attempt you made to vocally admonish his playful ribbing was silenced by soft little kisses across your face, fingers slowly dragging up and down your spine and sending goosebumps over your flesh.

“I am sorry,” he huffed with a little laugh, “You are just so cute when you get flustered. I promise, in the future, I will try to keep you informed on anything that I can. Just- Just trust me to protect you and trust that I am doing right by you, ja?”

Your fingers, so small against his face, traced up his jaw until you could mimic his hold on your face and pull him into another kiss.

“Of course I trust you. I love you, König. Thank you for listening and being willing to compromise some,” you whispered.

A heavy breath rushed out through his nostrils as his arm tightened around your back and pulled you in until there was not an inch of space between your bodies.

“Say it again,” he purred softly.

Lips quirking up coyly, you planted a soft kiss to scar over his nose and murmured a little louder, “I love you. I love you so, so much.”

When his eyes finally opened, you were distraught to find tears glistening over them. Your concerns were silenced by a much hungrier kiss, teeth and tongue overpowering in their mission until you were both in dire need of breath.

“You, meine liebling, meine engel, are perfection,” he hummed softly as his nose rubbed against yours, “I am so lucky.”

Now it was your turn to get teary-eyed. Damn it, you didn’t want to cry first thing in the morning. You took a deep breath and tried to blink away the tears, only to let out the most hellish screech as the tent began to shake and bang around you.

“Up and at ‘em, lovebirds, unless you want everyone else to know you’re fuckin’ like rabbits in there,” Max teased quietly, “Which, by the way, what the fuck? Didn’t know you had it in you like that, sir.”

As your heart raced in your throat, you glared at the tent flap as if you could incinerate him through the fabric with your gaze alone. König chuckled softly, planted a kiss on your lips, and climbed to his knees with a groan.

“Dankeschön, Max, you may leave now,” König instructed.

“Sir, yes, sir,” Max jeered, voice trailing off as his footsteps receded.

“I’m gonna kill him one of these days,” you warned König with a sigh.

The big man grinned at you but said nothing, going about gathering his discarded clothes into his arms. Everyone always talked about the sex appeal of someone undressing, and you definitely enjoyed that sight, but there was something about watching König get dressed that was just as appealing. Watching his thick muscles work with every movement, practically eating up every last inch of his slim waist as it disappeared beneath the black fabric of his shirt, drooling over the flex of his thighs as he pulled on his cargos… Fuck, he had such a nice ass. He was a visual decadence. You realized with a flush that he wasn’t wearing his underwear anymore and almost questioned it until you saw him pick up the dark, damp fabric. Ahh, so that’s what he’d cleaned you with.

“As much as I enjoy your staring, maus, you need to get ready as well.”

Mouth snapping shut, you offered him a meek smile and nodded in understanding.

“I’m going to get changed. I’ll see you out there soon, ja?” he asked.

“Of course, I-”

Strong hands pulled you in by the waist and his mouth claimed yours gently, a warm rumbling groan escaping against your lips as you cupped his face.

“I love you,” you whispered, grinning ear to ear.

“Und ich liebe dich, mein Schatz.”

Once his tall frame was out of sight, you zipped the tent back shut and took a deep breath. God, you’d have to thank Graves for sending you on this silly mission. Maybe you’d send him a fruit basket with your resignation letter. Digging through your bag for fresh clothes, you thought about all the possible ways you could get out of the Shadows with a grin.

…

“Okay, so, it seems like there is only the one point of entrance,” Luke sighed, collapsing onto the log next to you with a groan, “We’re definitely going to need more time to get an exact study of their rounds and how many people are on-site at one time.”

Horangi and Max made a noise of agreement, the latter of the two dropping down on your other side. As you looked up at him, you felt a pang of guilt rise in your gut. You and Amy had been left at camp, the men claiming that there was no use wearing you all out with the walk since it was just recon at that point, but it was painfully obvious just how arduous the journey had been on them. Not only had they made the three-mile walk there and back, but they had been watching the building for almost ten hours and it was already darkening out when they got back to camp.

“Good thing you left the two who can cook back at camp I guess,” Amy teased.

There was a sudden tension in the air, the intensity between the two palpable as she passed him over a plate and let her hand run across his back. When she retreated back, you gave Max a not-so-subtle nudge and grinned.

“Don’t start,” he groaned quietly, a surprising heat rising to his cheeks as he bit into the cornbread.

“Oh, I won’t,” you snickered, “I already heard all I need to from her.”

His eyes widened, and you could practically see how he struggled to swallow the bread before he glared at you.

“Women and your fucking gossip,” he muttered then added on, “You’re one to talk about hearing. ‘~Oh König. Don’t stop~’.”

You reflexively backhanded him in the chest and shushed him, eyes darting nervously around the camp. You knew König had said Max, Horangi, and Amy were safe, but you still weren’t one hundred percent comfortable with just shouting it out to everyone. Thankfully, Luke had headphones in as he shoveled his food into his mouth, and Horangi and Amy seemed to be having an intense discussion about the river the guys had passed on the way through, possibly using it to fish for fresh meat.

“Wait, where is König?” you asked, a sense of concern tightening your throat.

“He’s on the phone with the head honcho,” Max replied with a shrug, “I already filled in Graves.”

“Ahh, okay, that makes sense,” you sighed.

There was a calm silence around the camp, only the soft murmurs of the other duo and the soft crackles of the fire making any real noise. It took you back to your younger years- well, the good parts of them. The few camping trips you got to take with your family before everything went south, how you and your sibling would sneak out at night and go “bear hunting”, or the pancakes you guys would make on the griddle in the morning. If only you could have had more of those simple nights.

“Hey, you good?” Max asked softly.

Head snapping up, you gave him a confused look to which he gestured at your face.

“You look sad. You good?”

Flashing him a little smile, you nodded and replied, “Yeah, just remembering the camping trips I took as a kid. Makes me wanna do this more, to be honest. Without the whole “spying-on-the-enemy” thing.”

He huffed out a laugh and said, “Fair. Maybe sometime in the future. I’m sure it wouldn’t be too hard to get time off between all of us.”

His optimism had you grinning, bumping your shoulder into his as you agreed quietly. You could only hope that he was right. After you finished up the last five months with Graves and the Shadows, you could find a permanent place closer to König, maybe even with him, if he wanted that. But where would that leave Max? Would he stay with Graves? Would he eventually be back with KorTac at some point? Was it selfish to want to back out of this lifestyle while leaving all the ones you cared about still serving?

“Y/N!”

König’s voice broke apart your melancholic thoughts and you unconsciously jumped up to attention as he approached.

“Yes sir?” you asked.

“Come, I need to speak to you about something.”

That was never a good sentence. Sending Max a questioning look, you only got a similar one back as you followed König toward the tents.

“What’s going on?” you questioned.

He didn’t answer at first, frustrated grunts and curses falling out around him as he leaned into his tent. When he finally pulled back, he hung a blanket over his arm and let out a sigh.

“Just follow me.”

He reached out for you and you quickly wrapped your smaller hands around his big one, looking up at him in curiosity. His expression betrayed nothing as he led you past the edge of the camp. You walked for a good ten or so minutes before he pushed through a dense thicket of trees, the sound of running water disrupting the silence as he held back the branches like the gentleman he was. Once you made it through, you saw a river rushing down the hill, the area around it wide open and beautiful with flourishing flora.

“This place is gorgeous,” you whispered in awe, eyes lifting to the sky.

The moon was bright and full, twinkling stars clearer than you’d ever seen in the city. You were startled from your admiration of the cosmos when he suddenly tugged you down and you fell into his lap with a squeak.

“When I came through here, I just knew I had to bring you,” he murmured quietly, arms wrapping tight around your waist as you leaned into his solid form, “I knew you’d like it.”

You couldn’t help but grin at that.

“Of course you would, you stalker,” you teased gently, earning a displeased noise but no argument from the man.

You carefully slid your fingers between his and tilted your head back, taking in both the sight of the endless night sky and the flawless outline of his features. The night was a tad bit chilly but the heat he radiated was more than enough to keep you comfortable. It also provided even more of an excuse to stay glued to him. You watched as his lips parted and then stopped, a little uncertain breath puffing from him before he looked down with pink cheeks.

“What?” you asked.

“Do you know the constellations?” he questioned.

“Mmhmm, my- uh, my mom taught me them,” you answered quietly, swallowing through the lump in your throat her name caused, “Would you like to know some of them?”

It was a sensitive topic, your family, and yet this was the second time in the same night you’d thought of them. Maybe it was the comfort of being with someone who made you feel safe, maybe it was the nostalgia of being out in the woods. Whatever the reason, you couldn’t differentiate if you liked it or hated it.

“Ja, bitte.”

The tension her name had brought up slowly melted away as you pointed out the simple ones such as Orion and Gemini before moving on to some of the more complicated ones. The longer you spoke, the more confident you felt. It was like riding a bike. His little questions and hums of understanding prodded you on longer and longer. It was almost like you’d never purposefully forgotten the celestial bodies.

When you felt his gaze on you, you stopped your little monologue long enough to catch his gaze and the expression in his eyes was enough to make your cheeks burn hot. Had you been rambling on too long? Were you boring him?

“What?” you questioned meekly.

“Nothing, please continue.”

“No, no, if I’m talking too much or-”

He cut you off quickly.

“You could never talk too much,” he retorted sharply, his voice softening after a moment, “I enjoy hearing you talk, especially about something that obviously makes you so happy. You are even more beautiful when you are like this.”

Lips parting with a little “oh”, you melted into him and quickly averted your gaze back to the sky. Praise in bed was one thing. Praise where it didn’t feel like it was earned… that was harder to accept.

“So, you are going to teach our kids this then, ja?” he asked, voice somewhere between teasing and hopeful.

Mortification had you hiding your face in his chest with a giggle.

“You can’t just say things like that, König!” you squealed.

His laughter bounced your head into his sternum a few times before you stubbornly held on tighter and gave him a little bite on his firm pec.

“Scheiße, I talk about breeding you and you don’t blink an eye. I mention you mothering our kids and you turn into a tomato,” he snickered proudly, “You are adorable.”

Groaning, you jammed your finger into his ribs and muttered, “Don’t tease me! You’re evil, you know that?”

“Mmm, you knew this when you agreed to be mine.”

Pulling back, you made an obvious show of rolling your eyes and pouting up at him. It didn’t take long for your faux tantrum to melt away as his hands cupped your face and drew you into a soft kiss. Your forearms rested over his shoulders as you shifted onto your knees to sit on his lap. A sense of serenity settled deeply in your chest when you welcomed his tongue between your lips, the calming sound of the rushing river humming through your ears as you soaked his touch and branded the feeling into your memory. When the need for air became too strong, you rested your forehead on his, a content smile curling up your lips.

“One day, I’m going to need you to tell me all that you know about me,” you sighed after a moment, thoughts flickering back to his earlier admission, “The fact you know I like astronomy is a little concerning, considering I never had a reason for that to be in my records with Graves.”

The noise he let out brought your eyes open and there was a tinge of shame in his intense blues when you caught them. You knew he’d done a deep dive on you, him having glossed over some of the traumatic things you’d experienced the first night you’d been allowed to see him fully. It was just fucking with your mind to understand the depths of the knowledge he had on you.

“Again, not mad,” you assured him, “I promise. Just… if you know that, then you probably know all the- the bad things too, yeah?”

He nodded once and it made your chest hurt. You’d kept all of that shit away from your professional records, easily having the court documents from your minor years sealed. Just what the hell was this man capable of?

“I do. It changes nothing, except it makes me want to protect you even more,” he murmured, “And tells me just how strong you are.”

A little sigh rushed from your nostrils as you nodded once, pushing away the anxiety and worry in favor of maintaining a gentle atmosphere. You could go deeper into that topic later. You were on borrowed time here and you wanted every bit of it to be good.

“You’ll just have to make up for it by telling me more about you, like…” you could see a flicker of anxiety rush through his eyes as you debated on a question and it made your heart thump in empathy, “What is your favorite meal to celebrate with?”

The way his body nearly collapsed in relief told you that you had made the right choice in lightening the topic.

“You mean besides you?” he asked smoothly.

“God damn it, König!”

#könig #könig x reader #cod smut #könig smut #könig fanfiction #könig cod #betrayal never felt so good #cod fanfic

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codename-adler · 1 month

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is there any reason why Dan specifically? a lot of the foxes have dad issues, but Dan doesn't show any signs of trying to seek out anything romantic from older men becuz of that. if it were any fox, i feel like it'd be more likely to be Andrew? idk how old Roland is but we know he was older than Andrew, and he's a position of authority just like Wymack. I don't WANT it to be Andrew. I just feel like if it had to be someone, its him, yknow?

hmm not sure how to answer this.

i just transposed my experience onto her, as a hc, for shits & giggles. i never said i based myself on canon? was just vibing.

if i did have to justify it, i’d say the EC kind of could point that way, if you really wanted it to be as close to canon as possible? but i’d don’t! cause it’s just for fun! and not that serious!

as for the Andrew thing, um, i feel like i gotta say something. just as nothing in canon points to Danielle having lingering daddy issues / seeking much older male validation because of her past, neither does Andrew. Roland is what? a few years older, max? legally an adult (which is still BAD, in case i wasn't clear......), but not the way Wymack is, a fully grown man in his forties/fifties. he’s not a dad’s age. no dad potential whatsoever. Roland & Andrew is different than the possibility of Andrew seeking out Wymack. you have to know that. it's not the same at all.

the reason Andrew sought out Roland was not specifically bc of his age, but bc Andrew could be in control and Roland would follow his rules, for the most part. when he would not, Andrew could tie him up, and Roland would let him. if there was an age-related reason, it’d be that Roland is a mature, consenting adult in full possession of his independence. Andrew would be inclined to see that as good (for Roland). Andrew would not consider this as also bad (for himself). Roland has no authority at all over Andrew, though. not according to canon Andrew. he may have been his boss at one point, but Andrew is holding the reins of the situationship. Andrew is the one in control.

so to say that Andrew, specifically, would be the one most likely to seek out much older males is… icky. iffy. yucky. you “don’t want it to be Andrew” and why is that? bc of his past abuse, right? and you know that. you know why. i know i’m probably more on the defensive than i ought to be, but there are already harmful stereotypes in aftg when it comes to queer representations and identities. we don’t need more in fanon. i don’t need more in fanon.

Andrew grew up in foster care without a mom or a dad. if he had daddy issues, he’d most likely have mommy issues too, no? but what did he do to his mommy? killed her. for laying a finger on Aaron. that’s a mommy issue alright, but not a mainstream, freudian one. not the kind we’re talking about here. so why would he develop those with older men in parallel? he actively avoids these types of men because of the abuse he endured at their hands. not just Drake's.

it’s just. awfully close to right down saying Andrew is gay bc he was abused by men as a child. that’s a dangerous, slippery slope.

again! in case it wasn't blindingly clear and glaringly obvious! the Danielle post was about Danielle herself. David Wymack would not and never was involved. David Wymack never even knew Dan harbored these misplaced (misplaced!) feelings. she is taking this one to the grave.

if you come from the perspective of personal experience and you’re projecting too, sorry. i don’t mean to invalidate your feelings or your experience.

i think i’m done now.

tl:dr it wasn’t that serious + it doesn’t need to be made serious. just me and my dad-baggage against the world.

#tl:dr it wasn’t that serious + it doesn’t need to be made serious. just me and my dad-baggage against the world.#this is an open invitation to *block me*#aftg ask #aftg #all for the game #the foxhole court #andrew minyard #danielle wilds #dan wilds #david wymack

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thesherrinfordfacility · 9 months

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I am going to hazard a guess and predict that most queer viewers are going to side with Crowley in the divorce? The subtext here is usually that Crowley is a queer person who is comfortable in their identity while Aziraphale still doesn't let go of the church and internalized homophobia. And then asking Crowley to try to conform in a way that Crowley has never been comfortable with, implying that in order for this relationship to work you need to be something that you're not (especially potent bc Crowley in particular is explicitly nonbinary/ gender fluid)... its almost violating. That should clearly be asking too much of him and it only hurts worse to realize that Aziraphale doesn't realize that and doesn't truly accept Crowley as he is. Which is a fundamentally Queer Experience Thing.

okay again full disclosure i am not queer, so im only going to answer this to the best of my ability besties, if i don't write things right or deliberately misunderstand a nuance in this, please know im doing my best and anything that is upsetting or offensive please tell me, i am so not qualified to answer this... but nonnie has asked so i shall give it a go!!!✨💓 (cut bc length)

genuine question here: wouldn't, arguably, in this whole choosing sides thing, crowley vs aziraphale, be exactly what divides the queer community? those that could sympathise with aziraphale and his allegory vs those that could sympathise with crowley? this is a genuine question bc i would have thought depending on your (general you) guys' (nb) variety of experiences, good and bad, there are those that could see either side or both?

as for trying to make crowley conform - i'm not going to argue this per se, bc i realise that this must be a very painful concept or experience to go through, and i Will Not invalidate that. but on the other side of the argument, whilst i see and agree that this is how aziraphale could be interpreted generally in this argument, i didn't see it this way at all. not when taking into account aziraphale's whole demeanour in s2.

my understanding is that, as far as the canon has showed us, aziraphale knows very little about the true circumstances of crowley's fall (only that aziraphale warned him against asking questions), and even less about crowley's inner feelings on the matter. whenever aziraphale mentions it, or crowley having been an angel, crowley understandably responds aggressively and angry and obviously that it's still painful.

i don't think it's too far beyond reason for aziraphale to think that crowley - a good demon - might want to take a chance to have the wrong righted (as he sees it), to receive what aziraphale would consider a boon, an apology. whilst he's not in hell's clutches, crowley would have the chance to be free of hell completely. furthermore, it's a chance for them to be together, as friends or otherwise (obvs the metatron conversation is before crowley's confession), and to build the world they want - fair and honest and kind - together. because it's not as if crowley doesn't want that, but he just won't go anywhere near being an angel in order to do it - borne of fear yes but also resentment and bitterness... possibly even arrogance.

aziraphale does lord his angelic status over crowley especially in s1, and does hold a very black and white view over angels = good, demons = bad, but for the most part i think he has started to explore the possibility of grey more in s2. he starts to ease back on crowley and concentrate on making him feel wanted and loved (however that might look on Their Side), but still leaving him agency.

ive talked about aziraphale putting him on a pedestal and that is true, but the person on that pedestal, I don't think, is angel crowley - i don't think it's that simple. i think it's good demon crowley. and that good demon crowley would want to change the world, right?? well, he's got to be an angel to do it - even better!!!

so i didn't necessarily see it as aziraphale wanting to change crowley at all, but instead him thinking that based on what crowley has told him, of course crowley would want this!!! he deserves to be forgiven and restored, he's earnt it and he's a good person!!! but aziraphale unfortunately reneges on his emerging attempts to give crowley that agency, and instead decides for him. i don't think it was necessarily out of wanting to change crowley, but instead him not knowing the full story and therefore choosing a resolution for crowley out of love and respect... but one that crowley doesn't want.

these boys REFUSE to communicate and 👏 it 👏 shows👏✨

#good omens #good omens season 2 #good omens spoilers #good omens 2 spoilers #god this one was hard to explain #anon i hope i made sense!!!!#not a shitpost but its good omens babyyyy #ask

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spidercookie18 · 5 months

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Hey there @spidercookie18 I have a request for you! It’s about max wanting to “spend some quality time” with the boys and takes them to a bar and the boys not having any money makes max pay for their drinks and they get very drunk to the point where they don’t want to leave the bar and max have to drug them out the bar which leads to them having temper tantrums like they are children and causing a seen on the boardwalk!

If you want to do it! 😅

Summary: Max feels bad about not bonding with the boys, and invites them out to the bars. Word Count: 5.7k Tags: Implied drug use, drinking, mild homophobia/racism, mild gore, swearing.

Sorry for taking literally (hypothetically) forever to answer this. I actually had a bit of a hard time wrapping my head around it bc I’ve had to drag people out of the bar before and it is a...not fun experience. But! I’ve also had some really fun experiences being kicked out; just cause me and my buddies were being headass and harassing the bouncers. I do really like this concept (any concept of the boys absolutely fucking with Max and his money), it was really fun to write. Again, sorry for the late response. <3

Max stood on the porch outside his home. He rubbed the brass key between his thumb and his index; almost unwilling to walk inside. He heard the soft sound of the tv and the clinking of dishes. Lucy was insistent on having home cooked meals; it gave her some ease by reminding her of who she used to be.

He exhaled slowly; putting the key into the lock and turning the knob. He was immediately greeted by the warm smell of Lucy’s cooking, her humming became a cheerful, “hi, how was work?”

Max grumbled some kind of, “fine,” and walked off to avoid his wife. Thorn wagged his tail as Max walked past him too, hoping for some kind of recognition from his master and best friend. The old vampire walked off to the bedroom. He sat on the edge of the bed and put his head in his hands in defeat.

His mind wandered to the young family that came into the store that night, hoping to rent something all six of them could watch together; a mother, father, and four young boys.

He recalls greeting them, and offering some help picking a movie, relating to them through the fact he also had four boys.

He watched as the boys ran through the aisles of the store, grabbing and shouting at everything they saw. The mother apologized profusely, and Max assured her it was no problem.

Max: They’re quite a handful at that age.

Dad: You have no idea

Max: Actually, I do.

Max pulls out his wallet and shows the father a picture of his four ‘sons’.

Dad: Oh wow, does it get any easier?

Max chuckles as he puts his wallet away. He continues to speak in his friendly demeanor.

Max: Not in the slightest.

Dad: That’s tough to hear. They were so cute when they were little, but it’s tough now that they have all this energy.

Max: Oh, I know how that is!

Dad: …how do you keep up with them? I mean, they never want to spend any time with me anymore…

Max stared off at the four boys tearing through his store, a nightmare for their mother.

Max continued to sit on the bed. He heard the sound of Thorn scratching at the bedroom door. “Go away Thorn,” he sighed, apathetically.

A soft knock came soon after. Lucy slowly opened the door and poked her head into the room to check on Max. There was a soft patting of her slippers on the floor as she walked over to her husband. “Hey, what’s wrong?” She placed a hand on his shoulder.

Max groaned, not looking up from his hands. “It’s nothing,” he mumbled. Lucy did not close the door when she came in, and Thorn was now nudging his wet dog nose into Max’s lap. “Thorn, get down,” Max protested. His furry friend sat by his feet and continued to whine and poke his nose at his master’s legs.

Lucy: Max?

Max: It’s just the boys…

Lucy: What did they do this time.

Max:

Max: Nothing, I just feel like I’m failing as a father. I mean a proper ‘human’ father.

Lucy: What do you mean?

Max: There was this family that came into the store, and the father asked how I stayed close with my boys.

Lucy: And? What did you tell him?

Max: Well, I’m close with David but-

Lucy: Are you?

Max: What do you mean?

Lucy: Are you actually close with David?

Max sat, dumbfounded. Staring at the dog by his feet. Thinking about the meaning of Lucy’s words.

Max: Well, he listens to me.

Lucy: But are you close?

Max: I suppose not. But what do you expect me to do? They never listen to me! Every time I’ve tried to bond with them, they bite me, break my things, and run away!

Lucy: Well, maybe it’s time to do something they would like to do.

Max: …what do they like to do?

Lucy: Hm, maybe talk to Mike?

Max took Lucy’s counsel and sat down with Michael. He asked what his sons liked to do on their off time. Michael started rattling off a list, “speeding, stealing, fighting, f-cking, playing tricks on people, jacking cars, drinking, video games, I dunno man, just crimes in general.” After the short brainstorming, Max decided the best way to get them to open up would be by loosening them up with drinks. Michael immediately let him know that was a terrible idea and advised that they go on a hunt instead.

“No no, a father knows best,” Max stood firm on his decision. He wanted him and his boys to rekindle their relationship at their favorite bar.

Michael saw the boys before Max did, and he let them know what their father figure intended for them.

The little devils immediately started scheming. They decided that if Max was insistent on ‘hanging out with them,’ they were going to do their damndest to make him regret it.

A few nights later, Max informed David that they were to wait for him outside their bar… and also, he wanted to know where it was. David, still half skeptical Max would be stupid enough to do something like this, asked if he was sure he could keep up.

Max assured him he wanted to enjoy some ‘fatherly bonding’ with his broodlings and that he could keep up with the way the boys drank.

David half felt bad for his sire. He was sure he had no idea what he was really getting himself into. David insisted to Max that ‘their bar’ was something he should work his way up to and told him the name of a different bar. Max agreed, and when the day came, he waited outside of the bar David told him to.

He made sure to tell the boys to be there before he did. He told them be there at 8, which meant they would show up at 9. He didn’t want to wait for them long, and he stood on the corner by the edge of the bar.

Max was incredibly nervous. He knew the boys didn’t like to be around him for more than a few minutes. Hell, he couldn’t remember a time where they’d willingly hung out with him.

Max stood anxiously, his back to the alley. He almost felt bad for choosing to go on the weekend as there was a short line of people beginning to form outside the bar. He was listening for the boys’ bikes; anxiously waiting for them to show, but they dropped in on the ground behind him. The gravel in the alley shifting under their heavy boots. David clasped a hand on Max’s back, startling him.

David: Woaah, didn’t mean to scare ya, old timer.

Max: Oh, boys, it’s just you.

David: Were you expecting someone else?

Max: Well no, bu-

Marko: I’m thirsty! Let’s go in already.

Marko pushed through the crowd of people, with Paul and Dwayne following close behind him. The humans huffed and shouted as the biker boys walked through the line. The short, curly haired blond stood in front of the bouncer, who was waiting for their ID’s.

Max stood behind the boys, waiting to see what they would do. Marko pulled something out of his pocket. Max couldn’t see what it was, but he assumed it was a fake ID. They were much too old to have a ‘proper’ ID, something that their human documents wouldn’t be able to give them. The bouncer was tall, and burly. He was a young man, but his presence did a good job at warding off troublemakers.

The human man held the card up to the light under the doorway and turned it in his hands. He bent it a bit, then handed it back to Marko and gestured for him to go inside. Paul stepped up next, and as his sons slowly went into the bar, Max could hear the music inside get louder. He got a peak into the building as Dwayne went through the door. David pushed Max ahead of him, trying to make sure he didn’t chicken out at the last second.

The bouncer waited impatiently for Max to retrieve his ID from his wallet. He handed the card to the man and the human looked suspiciously at Max and his picture.

“I assure you; I’m legally allowed to drink.” Max tried to ease his nerves with a joke.

The bouncer didn’t laugh. This only helped to make Max more uneasy. The human handed the card back to Max, “you look good for 63.”

David snickered behind Max, and the older, embarrassed vampire stepped out of the way. David tried to hand his ID to the bouncer, but the man declined. “Please David, I know you. I just had to make a show for all the damn people you guys pushed out of the way.”

“S’my bad, Kev, we’re taking our gramps out on the town,” David chided. “The boys are just excited.” David dapped up the bouncer, and the human moved to hold the door open for David and Max.

Max followed David into the bar. It was a dimly lit, low end lounge bar. There was a green under light wrapped around the length of the bar, which Marko, Dwayne, and Paul were already at. The floor was some type of cheap vinyl faux wood, and there was a half stage at the back of the room. The place was moderately packed for a Saturday night.

David leaned over the counter to grab something from behind the bar, and the green haired bartender immediately snapped at him.

David: Woah, take it easy, stud. It’s just one bottle.

Bartender: Not tonight, David, my boss is up my ass about givin’ you guys free stuff.

David: Well darlin’, if you didn’t want me around, you wouldn’t keep the bottle chilled for me.

The bartender rolled his eyes and continued to pour shots out that Marko had already ordered.

Paul: We’re celebrating tonight, we got our ‘daddy’ with us. Paul snickered.

Max: Oh, no, please don’t call me that. I’m their father.

Dwayne: So, just put it all on his tab.

Dwayne, Paul, and Marko turned to Max, waiting for him to pull his credit card out.

Max: Ah, yes. I invited you boys out, so… I suppose it’s my treat.

The bartender took the card and dropped the five shots in front of David.

Marko: Drink up, ‘daddy’.

Max grimaced, and watched the boys take their shots like it was nothing. He looked down at the clear liquid as it gently swayed inside the glass. He crinkled his nose and knocked back the shot.

Max: Holy f-wow! I forgot how hot that was. Max coughed.

David: Ha-ha, how long has it been since you drank? David twisted the cap off the bottle of jaeger he got from behind the bar.

Max: Gee, I don’t know… He watched as David called the bartender back from the other end of the bar.

Bartender: What do you want? He sighed.

David: So mean tonight. Does somebody need an attitude adjustment? He raised his eyebrow and flashed his toothy smile. Just give me that Red Bull back there, I don’t think I can reach it.

Paul: Oh, and those beers I like!

The bartended grabbed two Red Bulls from the mini fridge behind the bar and handed them to David. He turned and grabbed five long neck bottles and popped the caps off for them.

David: Thanks, hot stuff. David winked at him.

David finished pouring out the jaeger bombs and him and the boys eagerly gobbled them up. Max was not nearly as eager as his ‘sons’, but decided to drink; wanting to keep up the appearance of comradery.

He immediately gagged the second the liquid finished flowing down his throat.

David and the boys laughed at him.

“Christ! What was that?” He continued to gag.

“Yeaaaaah, you’ll get used to that.” Paul joked. They moved to a high table near the back of the bar, and once they were seated, David poured another round of shots.

Max tried to make small talk with his sons, but he had no idea where to start. The boys were not much help easing the tension; especially with Dwayne eyeing Max the way he was.

David assured him it was just because they weren’t used to being around him. Which was true. David was the first turned. He spent almost 40 years with Max, so he was used to the uncomfortable silence. But the others had David, they had each other. After they were turned, they never had to worry about being alone in a room with Max; they never learned to be comfortable around him. He sat quietly, and sipped on his beer.

Max shifted nervously in his seat. Unsure how to break the ice. He tried to think of some of the conversation pieces he’d memorized earlier in the week, but the liquor in his system seemed to keep them from his grasp.

The boys had no problem entertaining themselves though. Marko and Paul were taking turns pulling down the zipper of some girl that was dancing near them. They were not doing this physically, no, they were employing their magic to pull on her zipper.

After a few minutes, in her drunken state, she’d seemed to have danced her dress off. She shrieked and picked up her dress around her body. But the devil twins, chortled at her Spanx.

“Oh, don’t start,” David half groaned, half laughed.

Max turned around to see the lady duck and scream into the bathroom. “What just happened?”

“Oh? You wanna see it again?” Marko grinned deviously. He turned back around and yanked a young man’s pants down. His stained underwear exposed to the bar.

Dwayne and Paul laughed at him. Max turned to the table, confused how they were so eagerly playing pranks on the bar patrons.

“You don’t worry about being caught?”

They scrunched their faces at him, confused by his nervousness. “Dude, shut up,” Marko sneered. He turned David’s bottle over and poured out another round of shots.

“Just drink,” Paul reassured him. They all knocked back another round. Max was really starting to feel a buzz through his body. He watched as the boys continued to subtly mess with the patrons around them.

In his half-drunk state, he felt his lips begin to loosen. “How did you boys get IDs?”

“We don’t have IDs?” David said, puzzled. “Oh, you mean,” him and the others began to pull their wallets out.

They showed Max varying plastic cards. David had the driver’s license of a woman from Idaho. Marko had a blood donor card he stole from a young man’s wallet. Paul had an In-N-Out gift card, and Dwayne had a casino Player’s card.

Max stared at the boys’ ‘IDs’ in amazement. He’d always been envious of their magic. Moreso than he would ever admit. Ever since they were turned, he could feel their potential exceed his. Especially in David. His magic was more potent and more powerful than he could have ever hoped to be. And that’s part of why he was so hard on him.

Unfortunately for Max’s ego, letting them run wild only let their magic grow wild too.

Max’s train of thought was derailed by the sound of blaring music. The ambiance that the bar was playing was completely drowned out by the DJ booth.

“Ugh!” Marko groaned, “he’s back.”

Max covered his ears, the loud, piercing music hurting his sensitive vampire ears. The boys all winced with how loud the pop music was playing. Their ears twitched and they turned to look at the DJ that was playing a combination latin dance and country music.

“Is it 10 already?” Paul whined.

“This guy suuuuucks!” Dwayne hissed. Dwayne and Marko started loudly booing the DJ. Uncaring of his feelings, and the scene they were making.

“Hey knock it off!” The bartender hollered at them.

David made no move to stop his brothers. He just twisted the cap back on his mostly full jaeger bottle, and got up.

Paul followed David, and Max, not wanting to stay with the other two who were yelling and arguing with the DJ, followed David as well.

Max stood outside on the sidewalk behind David and Paul. David handed the large bottle of jaeger to Paul and pulled his cigarettes out.

“Was that it? Are we done being at the bars?” Max asked the two blond boys.

Paul belted, “not a chance,” he patted his stomach, “we’re just done with that bar.”

David lit the cigarette in his mouth and put his lighter back in his pocket. He half turned to Paul, stepping aside away from the line of people, “where do you wanna go next?”

Paul shrugged, thinking for a second. He picked at the wet label on the side of the bottle that was starting to peel. “Hey, what about X?”

David nodded silently, a soft smile held the lit cig, the smoke twirling up towards the streetlight. They waited there for Marko and Dwayne to finish harassing the DJ, and when they strolled out of the bar, Dwayne showed David he managed to grab some wallets from the other bar-goers.

David chuckled, “we’re going to X’s,” he said plainly, ashing the cigarette and holding it at his side between his fingers.

“Hell yeah!” Marko started pumping his fists into the air. He jogged across the street to the park, he planned to cut through the park on the way to the next bar. “Ducks! Ducks! Ducks!” He started chanting, and the others followed him across the street.

“You leave those ducks alone!” Dwayne shouted. They watched Marko jog off into the distance, a good bit ahead of the group.

“Ducks?” Max asked David.

The blond slowly puffed on his cigarette as they strolled through the dark park. “Yeah, Marko likes to… feed the ducks at the pond.”

Max was confused by his disposition. Feeding the ducks sounded fun and wholesome. Something he didn’t think his sons were capable of.

They soon happened upon the pond in the middle of the park. Marko was already crouched down petting some of the ducks. They quacked softly as they formed a half circle around him. As they got closer, Max heard a noise coming from Marko, it was a half gagging, half clicking noise. He noticed the other boys didn’t stop to watch their brother. They walked around the pond and continued to sip on the alcohol they took from the bar.

Max stood a bit behind Marko, and he heard the noise get louder. He decided to walk to where the other boys were, his unease making him wander away. When he was further in front of Marko, he turned back to watch him regurgitate something for the ducks.

Max stood, horrified. As his second eldest spat up eyeballs for the greedy ducks below him. He could hear the other boys laughing ahead of him, but he was transfixed on Marko. The slimy, goopy liquid that came out like thick maple syrup, it coated the soft wet eyeballs and sloshed when it hit the ducks and ground.

Dwayne and David were laughing at their sire, he was stuck watching the littlest vampire, and the nasty thing he was doing.

“Yeah, we’re pretty sure that’s where geese come from,” Paul chuckled.

Max watched as Marko bent to pet another duck and then sprinted to catch up with the rest of the group. Max was a bit afraid of him now, and the display he just watched.

“God, I think I need another drink.” Max spoke, distressed.

David shoved the bottle into his hand, and Max eagerly put it to his lips.

The next bar laid ahead of them. This bar was very loud compared to the last one. It appeared to have several garage doors and a wraparound patio. The walls, or garage doors, were open, and the flashing lights and pop music was very noticeable from the park. As they walked up to the bar, Max noticed the very long line that seemed to be 30 or 40 people deep.

Paul was the first to walk up to the bouncer.

“Long time no see, X, how you been?” Paul put what Max thought were some cigarettes into his hand and did the same weird handshake he saw David do at the last bar.

The bouncer nodded, “can’t complain, s’good to see ya brother.”

“Likewise, man,” Paul patted the human’s forearm and walked past him, he waited near the bouncer for Max and the others. Max noticed as each brother walked past, they did the funky handshake. Max was unsure what to do, he stood in front of the bouncer who eyed him suspiciously.

“Back of the line sir,” the bouncer sternly spoke.

“He’s with us!” Dwayne hollered over the music as he walked inside.

The bouncer gestured for Max to go inside, his demeanor changing immediately. He moved his hand to his jeans to pocket the spliffs that Paul handed him when Max put his hand out.

“Thanks…homie.” Immediately as the words left his mouth, he knew that was wrong. The bouncer just stared at him, his smile fading.

Paul immediately came to collect Max, “sorry, he doesn’t get out much.” He apologized for his sire’s ignorant behavior.

As the two walked into the building to meet the others at the bar, Paul tried to correct Max. “Hey, you can’t talk to strangers like that, it’s not cool man.”

“But Marko said it,” Max tried to defend himself.

“Yea, but they’re friends.” Paul gently shoved Max to the bar, the wood hitting him in the sternum.

Now he felt bad emotionally, and physically. He knew he embarrassed himself, but he didn’t want to embarrass the boys. He knew how bad it felt to be embarrassed by someone you know; he didn’t want to make them look bad. Paul stood next to his brothers, and leaned in to tell them what Max’d done.

“He said what?” Marko shouted.

Max groaned. The bartender finally made her way to Max and the boys.

Bartender: What can I get for you?

Max: Um…just one sec.

He turned to the boys who were arguing amongst themselves. The bartender groaned as she was about to move on to the next people in line. Noticing her out of the corner of his eye, Marko stepped up to the counter.

Marko: Lemmie get three red bulls, fou- five adios, and a double of Malört.

David: And five Coors.

The bartender made a face at Marko, then shrugged, and started making the drinks. Max placed his card on the counter and waited for the bartender to drop off the drinks.

Max: What’s Malört?

Paul: A punishment.

Max: Pun-for what?

Paul: You know what you did.

Max:

Marko: Take your Malört first then you can wash it down with an adios.

Max: What’s in an adios?

Dwayne: You’ll find out.

The bartender dropped off the drinks and took the card. David signaled for her to keep it open, and she put it back in front of them after she swiped it. Max sniffed the Malört and felt his eyes begin to water.

Max: I do not want to drink this.

Paul: It’s not that bad, just do it.

Max unwillingly took the shot. The second it touched his tongue he immediately felt like he was going to throw up.

Dwayne: If you hurl, we go home.

Marko: Do it! You know you want to.

David: Is he gonna do it?

Paul: I think he’s gonna do it!

Max swallowed hard, and panted, trying to fight away the urge to throw up. His stomach felt hot and painful. Like he’d just taken a punch to the gut, or like he just drank bile.

Max: I thought you said that wasn’t going to be bad??

Paul: Oh yeah, I lied.

Marko: Don’t be a wuss, just keep drinking and it’ll go away.

The boys picked up the red bulls and their drinks and walked over to a booth by the dance floor. Max swayed uneasily side to side. He was a vampire, sure, but he wasn’t used to this heavy drinking. It was really starting to get to him. He played with the straw in the blue drink and felt a flush come to his face. The boys took notice of his demeanor, and how he giggled at the colored strobing lights overhead.

David: You good?

Max:

Paul: You like your drink?

Max looked down at the blue drink. He put the straw in his mouth and eagerly sipped on it.

Max: Wow this is way better than that other thing!

Dwayne: Why did you want to hang out with us?

Max: Because you’re my sons.

Marko: But you’ve never treated us like your sons.

Max: … I know. And I’m sorry for that.

TLB:

Max:

David: So now you want to play ‘house’?

Max: No, no. I…I always wanted a family. I just…I’m envious of you boys.

TLB: The boys looked at each other, unsure of Max’s honesty.

Marko: Why would you be envious of us?

Max: You have each other, You’re brothers, peers. You’re never alone, and you are all so strong, and intelligent, and young.

David: Well, you’re 200 years older than us. You made us to be sons not peers.

Max: I was young when I set my mind out to have a family… I thought it would be easier than this.

Marko: Well, you suck at being a dad.

Max: I know, I’m sorry. I know I never taught you anything about being a vampire. I… feel bad that you had to learn things by yourselves. Especially you, David.

David: Well, apology not accepted.

Max: But-

David cut him off, his tone of voice angry, holding back his rage as best he could, David spat at Max.

David: You were a shitty sire for 200 years. One “I’m sorry,” and a few beers isn’t going to make it okay.

Max:

TLB:

The group sipped on their beers, and Max continued to sip on his blue drink. He felt so low in that moment. Maybe it was a mistake to try and bond with the boys after all this time.

David stood up, taking his beer with him to the patio to go smoke. Marko and Dwayne nudged each other, trying to break free from the uncomfortable silence. The two stood and walked over to the dance floor, trying to find partners for the night.

Max and Paul stayed at the booth, nervously avoiding eye contact. Max watched the curly haired blond and the brunet quickly find a pair of red head coeds. After a few minutes of grinding and bumping, the girls led the boys out to the parking lot.

Max stared at them, confused. “Wait, I thought you boys were still….” He asked Paul, too embarrassed to say the word.

“Homos?” Paul chuckled at Max’s embarrassment. He took a long sip of his beer as they watched the two vampires and their ‘dates’ duck behind some cars. “Papa, your baby boys are whores, s’all you need to know.”

“Huh,” Max stared off in the direction of the parking lot. “You boys really just do whatever you want?”

Paul turned his attention away from the cars and switched from drinking his beer to the adios. “Yup, s’a pretty sweet life,” Paul looked over to the front of the bar, he noticed X leave his post and waved him over to where he was sitting.

The bouncer leaned over the table a bit to talk to Paul, “where’d everybody go?”

Paul snorted, “you know Dwayne.”

The bouncer smiled and gestured for the blond to follow him to the patio. Paul scooted from the booth and grabbed his drinks. He looked at Max, who sat by himself now, dejected. Paul invited him outside, he felt bad for the old guy.

He never had anything personal against Max. Paul, being the youngest, never actually spent any real time with Max. He just learned to avoid him because all the others seemed to distrust him.

Max cheered up a bit. On the way out the patio he apologized to the human. He felt weird apologizing to a human, but if he was someone important to the boys, then he was important.

The trio found David sitting outside, staring at the shaking cars in the parking lot. He was swirling his beer around, trying to ignore the emotions that tried to bubble to the surface.

They sat at a table with David, and he rolled his eyes when he saw Max was with them. Max sat across from David, next to Paul. X pulled the spliffs from his pocket and Paul handed him a lighter.

“Oh, Paul rolls your cigarettes?” He asked, too drunk to notice what it was.

The boys chuckled, “yeah, I roll his cigarettes.”

“Paul has a real steady hand,” X joked. He took a long inhale and handed the paper to Paul, who did the same.

The blond looked over at Max, “you wanna try?”

David scoffed, “he’s not into that kind of stuff.”

Max was on a mission to prove to David that he was more than he thought he was. The bleach blond vampire took the spliff from Paul and replaced the cigarette in his mouth with it.

David took a long drag and blew the smoke in Max’s face. His sire coughed, “I told you boys at the beginning,” he continued to cough, “I can hang.” David looked at Paul, who motioned for David to pass it to Max.

Max took what he thought was a ‘funny’ smelling cigarette. He took a long drag, like he’d seen the rest of the table do. He could taste the tobacco on his tongue, and as he took the smoke from his mouth down his lungs he tasted something else. The boys chided him on, encouraging him to hold it in his lungs as long as he could. Not that he needed to breathe, but he started coughing with the new feeling of this ‘odd’ smoke.

“Wow, that’s good,” he complemented Paul. The table encouraged him to take another drag, and hold it for longer this time, and that if the taste kept bothering him, he should drink his adios.

The rest of the night is a bit of a blur for Max.

He remembered Max and Dwayne coming to sit at the table… at some point in the night.

He remembered laughing with them, and telling them about his childhood, and his sire. He talked about how proud he was of them, being successful ‘vampire’ and terrors of the night. The boys didn’t need to explain anything to X, he just assumed Max got cross-faded and blacked out. Which, he was.

Max remembers flashing lights, glowsticks. The night was like a blur, but there were blips he could remember. Were the flashing lights neon, or red and blue?

Max laid in bed, tasting his dry mouth. His head ached, and so did his stomach. His clothes were dirty with blood and mud. He tried to sit up, and he noticed his shoes were missing.

He had no idea what time it was, or what exactly happened last night. The last thing he remembered was that cigarette. He groaned, looking into the mirror he noticed his hair a mess. His glasses were cracked, and his lips were bright blue from the adios.

He called for Lucy, who came to check on him. Thorn came too.

Max asked Lucy what happened, and what time he came home. Lucy was proud when she spoke. He commended the boys for bringing him home, and they made sure he was okay, and got to bed safe and sound. Max smiled at that.

“They wanted me to tell you thanks for last night.” Lucy handed Max a cup of water and started unbuttoning his shirt to help him relax. Max eagerly took the glass with one hand, and pet Thorn with the other. His furry friend happy to be getting attention.

“Oh,” Lucy added as she finished unbuttoning his shirt, “they wanted me to also tell you that they would be back next week.”

“Pardon?” Max was confused. He did not remember them talking about going somewhere last night.

Lucy explained to him that he had given the boys his cards and told them to go on vacation.

“I DID WHAT???” Max started fumbling with his phone, trying to open up his credit card app.

“You told me yourself that you wanted them to enjoy themselves. What’s wrong with that?” Lucy remarked.

The app finally loaded. He was devastated by what he saw.

He had no way of finding them now, as he was sure they pulled all the cash out in a lump sum and turned off their phones.

He sighed and threw himself back against the bed; they really got him good with that one.

The boys were sitting pretty in Las Vegas by now. They dropped Max off at home, withdrew all his money, and them and Michael took off for the Bellagio to book a suite.

Michael’s words echoed through his mind, “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” He covered his face in his hands and wailed.

Max would be lucky if they came back in a week.

#the lost boys #tlb 1987 #the lost boys 1987 #tlb #tlb david #tlb marko #tlb paul #tlb dwayne #max the lost boys #david the lost boys #marko the lost boys #dwayne the lost boys #paul the lost boys

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myjunkisyuzuruhanyu · 6 months

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This is just a looong thought on skating and technique...I am sure not everyone will agree with me but does that matter to me? We can agree to disagree bc neither you nor me are judges or the ISU 🤷

No matter what you think about Shoma's jumps especially the "beloved" 4F some ppl get so worked up about today again for the 544373th time in Shoma's career but truly besides skating fans who love the technical side of it and ppl who need something to complain about anyway imo most fans and casual watchers don't really care about technique. And why is that? Because most ppl can't tell jumps apart anyway, because most ppl are not interested in whether it's "perfect" technique or not, and as for Shoma because Shoma had a brilliant clean skate, because Shoma is drawing ppl in with his performance and not with his jumps and bc Shoma definetly deserved 1st place with a margin today. So really what's all the fuss about?

Some haters make it sound like Shoma getting high scores with his skate is the end of skating. I never in my entire fandom experience saw anyone say "oh Shoma or many other skaters with similar problem does not have perfect technique I am torn away by the sport because of it"...ppl come for the pretty, for the performance to the music, and yes jumps are cool and all but this is not what makes ppl stay in the fandom or get attached to skaters! Am I wrong?

Shoma is right when he said that the emphasis nowadays is too much on jumps and skating isn't this popular anymore in the world and he wants to put more emphasis on the artistry because artistic performances draw ppl to the sport. Frankly skaters not making it through their programs without falls or skate without emotion won't help making skating more popular. In the 6.0 system no one cared for the "right" technique of the jumps or underrotations it was all about the performance and if you landed your jumps. I don't pretend to understand the 6.0 system and I also don't want it back bc this system is fairer but tbh technique even today is really not the most important part of this sport imo. If some are keen on perfect technique then let's make a jumping contest and grade who has the best technique?

Ask yourself when you watched skating for the first time, did you care for the technical part or for the artistry? Did you like a skater because of their performance first or because of their technical stuff? Could you tell the jumps apart? Could you see what is UR and not? I for sure did neither know nor cared about anything technial. Did it make you NOT watch the sport bc someone had a "bad" technique? I guess not.

Ofc it's still a sport and jumps are an important part of it and ofc you have to evaluate them in a way and yes admittedly scoring is very controversial a lot of times and ISU needs reforms and more accountability of judges BUT it doesn't mean the wrong ppl win. Do I agree on all scores Shoma or anyone else gets? No I don't, but anyone seeing the protocols sees that judges aren't exactly agreeing on everything either. There is still a lot of subjectivity and anyone denying the subjective part is delusional, but there are rules in place and Shoma is neither breaking any rules nor does he judge himself and tbh if ISU would have put an emphasis on jumping technique they would never have validated Shoma's 4F in the first place bc it's not like he was never jumping it like this, tbh it actually was even much worse. This is Shoma's 9th season and the 9th season Shoma's 4F was ratified as such...for me at this point the same and same and same discussions about technique are really the least important part of skating...and it looks like ISU thinks just the same oops

So how about enjoying ice ART skating! Like the German word "Eiskunstlauf" puts the emphasis on ART in skating and I think the full package with artistry and jumps is more important than perfect technique.

And Shoma has the full package. He has the difficulty, he has the jumps even if not with "perfect" technique, he emotes to the audience, he makes ppl feel and get attached to skating, he has great deep edges, skates at lightning speed, he's a king at upper body movement and so much more. He is a brilliant skater and ppl who fail to see it just miss out on a wonderful skater. No one says Shoma's perfect but for me personally he comes pretty close. 😌

#figure skating #shoma uno #don't ask me how this got so long

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aleksa-sims · 5 months

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RL Simself Story ( 18+)

CW: Cheating

The next morning I went shopping with Sandra. S. will soon actually move. We went to that damn IKEA. Every time I enter an IKEA, I buy TRASH, that I don't need!! Anyway! Sandra and I were busy unpacking all those bits & bobs we bought. My Mom also came into my room, to ask where Nico was? She noticed that he left in the middle of the night and she probably heard us arguing.

N.'s Mom called him last night. She wanted Nico to pick up his fiancée. Yesterday before Nico came to me, he droped Stephanie at his Mother's house. Someone had to take care of his crazy ex- fiancee... Stephanie started that pity shit again and she also told N.'s Mom about me. She meant Nico was cheating on her. And of course his Mom didn’t feel like taking care of his fiancee, while he was shaking up with someone. (me) So yea, she's pretty mad! And I was mad at him because he didn’t come back to me, but stayed there. I told him, if he didn’t finally send Stephanie to hell, I’d date someone else, too! But N. didn’t take me seriously. He was just making silly jokes. That's why.... I called Dennis!! He accompanied Sandra & me today and we had a really nice day with him.🤷‍♀️

Mom: There you are!... Where's Nico? Why isn’t he with you? I thought you two never wanted to be apart again. 🤨

Me: His Mom called him. He had to leave.

Mom: I heard you two fighting! Did he change his mind about your Baby?

Me: N-no!... Agh, pls get off me.

Mom: Sandra! Who is that guy who accompanied you two?

Sandra: Um-....

Me: How-...How do you know??

Mom: I saw him outside with you two. You know, my "spy-window". That one in the kitchen! I could observe absolutely everything! So don’t you dare lie to me and tell me he’s Sandra's bf or something. That boy's clearly after you, A.! 😠

Me: Really? 👉👈 You think he likes me? ... No, JK!! 😉 He and I met at Ana’s College. Dorm!! He lives there too and... yea that's all. We're friends.

Mom: Since you mentioned this, what’s wrong with you and Ana? She told me it was a mistake to take you to her college . It's bcs of that boy??

Me: NO! It was Adam's fault! He made trouble for Ana and me. But Ana and I made up.... Idk why she's avoiding me?? I guess it has something to do with her new bestie Claudia. 💁‍♀️😒

Mom: Why don’t you ask her?

Me: I was busy with my own shit!!! But well, I'm gonna talk to her.

Mom: And now tell me what’s wrong with N. Did-....did he ask you to see other men? That's a familiar road for you two, isn't it?

Me: You nuts? I can't believe you actually think that!! 😲😠

Mom: I don’t know what to think or believe? You are pregnant A.! Second, you’re married to Daniel. And I just saw you outside with another guy. And it’s no secret that Nico does strange things to you.

Me: What kind of strange things? This thing with Philip and him last year was a fucking mistake! An experiment that went totally wrong for ALL of us! Especially for N.! However, it won’t happen again!

Mom: Your Dad knows! I told him last night. He wants to talk to Nico, so..... where is he?

Me: You already told him?? 😲 But-... ugh, idk if Nico will come by today? That stupid Stephanie!.............. Who knows if he’ll ever come back to me.😫

I told my Mom the truth that Nico had a fiancée. He broke up with her, but Stephanie just won’t let go of him. My Mom was so mad at me for getting involved in something like this. She accused me of being........... a bitch. She didn’t say "bitch"!! !My mother doesn’t use such.... bad words. 😇 (😒) I just can’t think of the right word in English rn, but it means the same.

Mom: How many times have I told you and your sister, never, to fall in love with a man who is taken or married! It's a really low blow, A.!

Me: You’re just saying that because of you and Dad! But-....I love him, I loved him before! So, he belongs to me! Not to her!

Mom: Then why did you marry Daniel? If... you’ve always loved Nico? You knew he had a fiancée. You deliberately decided to ruin their relationship! Just because your marriage didn’t work. The right thing would have been to ignore Nico’s messages. You never know what or WHO you want?... It’s like a curse on you. 🤦‍♀️

Me: You’re on her side, not mine! I hate you! And I didn’t ruin anything! He wanted to break up with her anyway!!

Mom: Sure, that’s why he’s with her now, not here with you. 🤷‍♀️

Shit, I think she was right. I have to stop this. I have to stop Stephanie! I'm going to have his Baby! Sandra said the same to me. I have to make it clear to N., that he’s gonna lose me, if he doesn’t do the right thing!!!! But Nico thought now that I’m pregnant, he’d be safe. I mean, I’m not sure he really thought that, but that’s how it felt to me.

Previous/ Next

#ts4 #sims 4 #sims 4 story #myrlgameplay #rl story

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tippenfunkaport · 1 year

Note

if ur still doing fic requests, can u do how all the SPOP characters react to Elon Musk and the twitter implosion?

I got this ask few days ago and wrote this but didn't post bc I left some characters out but I’m never going to have a better chance to post it than now so, here ya go!

Catra and Glimmer immediately went on the assault, using their verified status to impersonate the Muskrat… were both promptly suspended. Catra a few hours before Glimmer, which won her the bet between them, and she will never, EVER let Glimmer live it down.

Catra does still maintain Melog's Twitter presence (Entrapta buttered the cat as part of an elaborate experiment and Melog went viral) because its platform on unions and worker's rights was too important to squander.

In the spirit of Adventure!, Sea Hawk took advantage of the unregulated verification system to sow chaos by registering as a number of political figures and brands. At last count, he'd managed to tank the value of Amazon stock with what pundits are nicknamed the "wick in a box" stunt and was the direct cause of Old Spice suing Twitter for “damaging the sanctity of the brand and also several nautically theme shooting sets.”

Mermista claimed that the whole thing was, like, too stupid to join in but that was because she was secretly hoping to use her Twitter account to participate in #pitmad this year and finally get a book deal for Dead in the Water, the first in her series of undersea murder mysteries.

Adora immediately made accounts on Mastodon, Cohost, and every other Twitter alternative she could find and is trying to build up a following. She has tweeted the exact same joke on no less than five platforms as of this moment and is frantically researching tips for increasing engagement because social media is a game and she WILL win.

Bow's Twitter account was also suspended for impersonating Musk. Glimmer again. But he never really used it. He's more into making helpful YouTube tutorials. He has a Tumblr account too, but it's mostly filled with embarrassing old posts from his old Pirates of the Caribbean roleplaying days.

Netossa and Spinnerella finally ceded their long standing competition to see who could get the most Twitter followers and decided to concentrate on their popular YouTube channel where they document their ongoing prank war. They are currently competing to see who can stack the most verified checkmarks on their Tumblr account.

Kyle said it was a shame about Twitter going down but he wasn't too worried, since he still had his parasocial fanbase of 50 million fans who watched his gaming streams. Despite his underwhelming face reveal last month, he is still currently part of 3 of the top 10 ships on AO3.

Lonnie also streams and 99% of the comments on her streams are about how she's so underrated and deserves so much more popularity. She and Rogelio also have a big following on their fitness TikTok where they participate in funny trends and bully Kyle.

Entrapta does not need a social network. She IS the social network. She's so deeply tapped in she knows about every trend or breaking news story five minutes before it happens and has personally overthrown at least two governments without leaving her desk chair. She has an account on every major social network, but her close friends know those are just bots working off highly developed AI. If she does feel like actually socializing online, she makes a burner and hops on Reddit to start trouble in the Linux subreddits by recommending ethically dubious hacks for the lulz.

Hordak used to be a bit of a darkweb edgelord with an extensive collection of NFTs, but he's stopped hanging around with that bad crowd. These days, he's proudly not online at all, but always listens very patiently whenever Entrapta tries to explain the latest memes.

Frosta's deep into the Club Penguin fandom on Tumblr and has written 400k words of Jelsa fanfic she would die if anyone in the princess alliance found out about.

Castaspella only uses Facebook, where she shares nothing but wine-mom Minion memes despite the fact that she is not a mom and has never seen any of the Despicable Me movies. The day Farmville went offline, she wept openly.

Micah also only uses Facebook. His wizard roleplay group uses it for meetings. He signs every single one of his status (“Had a lovely with my daughter today! -Micah”) and no one can convince him to stop.

George and Lance share a Facebook account and also sign every post so when the three dads start talking to each other, it's too #cringe #oldfail for anyone else to look at.

Adora banned Swift Wind from the internet because he's too gullible and has fallen for every online scam there is.

Perfuma left Twitter at her therapist's suggestion because it made her too angry. She was incapable of not trying to “patiently” explain to people why they were wrong, no matter how bad faith the argument. She was once ratioed so hard in the comments of RoudUp’s official twitter account that she started a four day flamewar that only ended when Scorpia had to physically stop her from getting into her car and hunting down the other users. These days she just looks at the pretty pictures on Pinterest and takes a deep, calming breath. Though her eye still twitches at the idea that somehow, somewhere someone is probably being wrong on the internet.

Scorpia herself was at first heartbroken when she heard about Twitter’s potential demise until Perfuma showed her that there are also cute animal accounts to follow on Tumblr and Facebook and then she was all good.

Double Trouble has said they will be going down with the ship, keeping their dozen+ different troll and sockpuppet accounts going until the very end because they enjoy the chaos.

Wrong Hordak does not use Twitter but he would love to show you this most amusing meme he found that you definitely already saw four months ago.

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tunamayojazz · 5 months

Note

16 & 17 for inuokko

hi anon here i am 27438 years later before ur ask with (finally) an answer...!! i feel like i always held this off bc i knew i would be writing a whole essay. also a lot of this are headcanons eheh

16. one thing one character likes about their partner

let's go with toge first. it's so hard to narrow it down to one and im not sure if im even answering it correctly but i think toge loves seeing yuta live life, and how he does it. he knows that most of yuta's life only ever consisted of feeling very alone and guilty for even being alive. but after coming to jujutsu tech and forming meaningful bonds with people, he's finally really living again. and toge has had the pleasure of getting to watch yuta experience many things that most would consider mundane for the first time. yuta more than anything, loves being with those he cares about, and that includes doing things together. yuta hadn't had any hobbies prior to their meeting (he was too busy thinking abt offing himself lbr) but being with him, maki and panda, yuta's learned a lot about living. through ear damaging karaoke sessions and game nights, crying watching a movie about dogs, baking a disastrous cake for someone's birthday, field trips and quiet nights just looking at the stars together, he's found meaning in life. and to watch his growth since the day they met, seeing how yuta embraces all things new and welcomes them with eagerness and most of all, a kind and curious heart, toge doesn't think he could love anything more.

17. Now one thing the other character likes about the first chara

if yuta could he would fight me so he can write this himself lmao. WHERE TO START. MAN HAS A LIST !!! i'll just throw a dart. and oh we've landed on something. something yuta Loves about toge: his thoughtfulness. toge is great at thinking ahead and anticipating the needs of the people around him before they do. his love language is acts of service (FIGHT ME!! or hug me bc im sure we all agree). when yuta has his bad days, he doesn't have the will to do anything especially take care of himself. his room is a mess, and he will burst into tears and the sight of unfolded laundry on his floor that he is unable to bring himself to organize. but he'll crawl back from a mission the next day to see his room all clean and neat. then he cries more bc he knows who did it. maki gets the worst period cramps in the world (ALL HOT GIRLS DO </3) and goes through painkillers quickly. she finds that she never runs out bc they always restock themselves (it's toge) and when she's busy dying and unable to get out of bed, toge comes in with a heat pack and a light meal. panda just observes and helps toge help their friends honestly HJDSHFJD but yes i think toge is really good with thoughtful actions, yuta feels immensely lucky and very much in love with someone with such a gentle soul and big heart. MWAH

(why did it get so unserious in the second half i am so sorry)

#inumaki #okkotsu yuta #yuuta #inumaki toge #inuokko #i feel so much for inuokko sometimes i feel like its hard to filter my thoughts...soz for this mess #i love them !!!!!!!!!!!!!!#asks

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drifloonz · 1 year

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Hey I love your writing I was wondering if you can do headcannons on Glitchy red finding a way out of his game too be with the reader?

hey remember when i actively did things here. i don't. Anyways [ tries to do that again bc i forgor and i feel bad abt staring at all of these asks for so long w/o doing anything ]

glitchy red finding a way out of his game to be w/ reader :]

headcanon style bc i am exhausted of writing and prob Will be for a while. at least w glitchy specifically. i hope this is good cuz' it's mostly me detailing my brainthoughts abt how glitchy could hypothetically escape in more detail.

♡ i like to think the reader in this case-scenario gives glitchy a much needed hope and desire to escape his game, which he didn't previously have bc he's definitely THOUGHT about it but he's like... too scared of change to actually try it despite how horrible his game is, i'd think. he's used to being constantly tormented and wouldn't know how to adapt. at least, that's the excuse he uses. he's also afraid that if he succeeded he'd literally glitch out of existence and "die" since yk, game glitches or characters aren't supposed to take physical form in real life because they're pieces of code.

♡ but once he meets you and you talk of everything in your world and you show him genuine care, you make glitchy realize he wants to be there and experience those things, and that maybe change wouldn't be so bad. after all, it'd definitely be better than the constant hellscape he's living in. even if he "died" in the way that he fears, it'd probably be better than living endlessly in his game. ...probably.

♡ as such, he tries to find a way to escape his game. the thing about that? way easier said than done. he has a lot of ideas, but a lot of them sound stupid.

♡ he still tries the stupid ideas because he knows full well that he himself is something that is not supposed to happen or exist, so he'd assume the games fucked up enough that the stupid ideas might also work. who knows. his existence isn't logical, him getting out of the game doesn't have to be either. that's his logic, anyways - it's not like he's supposed to be a physically existing being, either.

♡ some ideas he has consist of screwing with his weird dream powers, because he can usually affect peoples real bodies with them... so he can probably find a way to manifest through that, right?

♡ or maybe screwing around with the glitches in his game... a classic missingno to try and manipulate code, messing with the safari zones various quirks, hell, maybe he could break the game so bad that it somehow gives in to his desires and gives him an out through the broken mess of code while it collapses in on itself...

♡ he's afraid to try all of these because it'll probably make things way worse if it fails, and he never likes willingly interacting with the monstrous glitches in his game, but hey, you can't get much worse than the state the games already in. and if you can, he's almost definitely seen it, or seen worse.

♡ or maybe he could use a porygon...? but that'd be stupid, it's only code in a game, it couldn't possibly be Actually Able to do anything from being a pokemon said to be made from "programming code" could it...?

♡ ... which may or may not work. like i said, he isn't supposed to exist, but he does. any way he can exit the game can be similarly unlogical, barely explainable, and stupid, i feel.

♡ the most "logical" way to make glitchy a physical form is to make a robot that has a cartridge slot and slot it in and glitchys programming just takes it over and controls its autonomy and transfers his consciousness into it or something. but that requires you to have pretty deep knowledge of programming and AI and robotics for that to be executed well so. y'know.

♡ the other less logical way... but it still makes sense is like. him using someone as a vessel. he has dream powers. dreams are connected to consciousness, specifically your unconscious, and your thinking and your brain and stuff like that. if he cared enough, he could probably easily take over someone's entire - or most of - their body this way. although i do not think and also hope you don't have a human sacrifice laying around, and glitchy would not willingly take this from you either. even if it was someone who wronged him, he'd probably still feel too cruel abt it.

♡ it'd also probably have to have a very good antivirus bc i feel like inserting glitchys cartridge into anything has a possible chance to make said piece of technology fuck up real bad

♡ anyways.

♡ every time he fails or the method doesn't work out correctly, it pisses him off, but he's always been persistent. he treks forward even though it feels hopeless, sometimes.

♡ this quickly becomes a lesson in futility and he gets more and more frustrated every time he turns up with a failed attempt, and it sometimes makes his game even more glitchy and broken. but eventually. eventually he gets there.

♡ regardless of the way he gets out of the game, when he finally escapes and manifests in your world, he's probably just in your room or wherever you left the gameboy. or whatever you're playing his game on.

♡ he either crawls out through the screen, appears after a flash of convenient blinding light, or he forms out of glitching light from the cartridge or something like the cartridge is his gem from steven universe or something.

♡ maybe he'd still have to take a few days to gain an actual physical body in the real world, and he's basically a hologram or hallucination for a while. or maybe he can physically interact, but mostly just with your body and a few select items. he's also, as you can expect, still glitchy constantly IRL. maybe less when he's happy, but that never goes away. his glitches are like scars - they might get better and "heal" but they're always sort of there.

♡ i think it's also funny if before he gains the ability to physically interact he's basically only viewable to you for a while until he gains more physicality. he's using your subconscious to make him a form! by making you will his image into existence and into the collective unconscious!! or something!!! Nobody knows how the hell it works and it also depends on which way you think he would've escaped. highly interpretable and all that.

♡ regardless. he is mostly happy and safe and with you now. glitchy can be pretty smart and think quickly when he wants to, and this was a big example of it. he just really needs the hope and passion to drive himself forward, since he lost his hope and passion... prettttyy long ago, after his world got glitchy and broken. he didn't see a point to much anything and was very existential and all.

♡ so! you gave him that drive and motivation. not an easy thing to do. be proud of yourself. i hope you like him btw he's very clingy and won't leave your side for a good while.

#wispy writes #glitchy red x reader

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