#GOD all he wanted was to save them he kept living for them he endured so much abuse for them he was willing to die for them

[goldiipond]

sweet dreams

#skye's doodles #the thing is they're definitely not sweet. but they'll all be worth saving his best friends. whatever im normal #got real emotional over pre-escape ray (<-misleading sentence bc it implies that im ever not emotional abt pre-escape ray) #GOD all he wanted was to save them he kept living for them he endured so much abuse for them he was willing to die for them #the nightmares the panic attacks the loneliness EVERYTHING WAS FOR HIS BEST FRIENDS. SHAKES YOU #im so normal about the amount of love in ray's heart ray would do anything for the people he loves. what EVER #also can you tell i had fun with the lighting on this one. because i did #the promised neverland #tpn #yakusoku no neverland #tpn ray #tpn emma #tpn norman

[acourtofmarvels]

Patience - Cassian

No OC this time, just your average Cassian x Reader (I used she/her pronouns but please use any you would like to.)

Summary: Y/N has been apart of the IC for 100 years after they saved her from a horrible incident that left her broken and traumatized. Cassian knew she was his mate from the second he saw her. Though he never could tell her, not after everything she endured.  They put her back together. She loved them and they loved her. Her family. Though, in the recent couple years she developed feelings a little stronger toward the male who she would soon find out to be her mate. 

Warnings: hints of abuse and assault. fluff

Word count: 3369

Cassian

"Why haven't you told her?" Rhysand asked me. I looked at him like he was crazy. He must be. Thinking I could ever tell her.

"How could I put that on her? After all she's been through. She's open to us now. She's stronger, braver. She's finally starting to learn to cope with her trauma. I don't want to scare her with something so... intimate."

I saved her. I have kept her safe. I helped her, trained her. Held her when she needed it, gave her space when she needed it. Those 50 years when Rhys was under the mountain she never left the House of Wind once. She didn't feel safe without her High Lord here. Even though Az and I were always with her.

"Cassian..." Rhys started.

"You kept it from Feyre, why? Cause you wanted to keep her safe, you didn't want to scare her. You wanted her to be ready for it. Thats exactly what I'm doing." He's being so hypocritical. How could he think I could just spring this on her?

"You've know for 100 years-"

"I knew the moment I saw her. She was covered in her own blood and vomit, bruised, broken and bare. You didn't see her, Rhys. You didn't feel-" I felt sick to my stomach just thinking about it. I was the one who covered her, brought her to Valaris to be healed and saved."What those monsters did to her..."

"They're dead now. They'll never hurt her again." Yeah. I killed them all. Made them suffer. Had them begging and pleading for their lives.

"She's still healing. I'd wait another 100 years if had to." 

Her POV

"We can go back if you want," Mor said quietly to me. We walked down the cobblestone sidewalk through the markets in the town square. Her arm linked in mine, her way of letting me know she wasn't leaving my side.

"No, I feel... good. It's a beautiful day. Everything feels like it's fitting into place. I've noticed these past few months that I finally feel like my old self again. But.. better."

It felt so good getting out of the house. Walking down the streets of my home. Home. I'd been here for a century. I've found my family here. People who love me, scars and all. And I love them. They're my rock. I wish I could say that I put myself back together after being broke for so long but it was them. They hold me together.

"Have you gotten all your gifts yet?" It was solstice this week. Everyone's favorite time of year.

"I have." I smiled at her. "And I'm not telling you what I got you." I knew by the tone in her question that's exactly what would lead next.

"Come on! Did you get it when we were together? I always take you shopping. How could you have possibly gotten my gift?"

"Cassian took me yesterday." I didn't like going out by myself. Too much anxiety. Mor or Feyre always go shopping with me in the markets. The boys take me other places, exploring Prythian if I please.

"Cassian never goes shopping with me! Gods, how did you convince him to do that?"

"I just asked him and he said yes." I shrugged. Cassian has always been sweet. He never tells me no. I feel guilty about it sometimes. I don't want to bother him.

"You have him wrapped around your finger, I swear." Mor groaned and I laughed.

"I do not." My face felt warm as a blush crept up upon my cheeks. Me blushing for a male? That hasn't happened since before... "Cassian just worries about me."

"Yeah worries a little too much." She rolled her eyes playfully. "You're staying at the town house with all of us this week right?" Rhys and Feyre mentioned they wanted everyone there this week. It was kind of tradition but this was the first solstice since the war and it just felt a little extra special.

"Of course. And I will also be drinking my weight in wine."

"Oh gods, a drunk you is never good." Mor and I both laughed loudly. I didn't drink much. Only with them. And usually on special occasions.

***

"Leave! You'll see us when we are ready!" Feyre yelled through the door. Rhysand wanted to see which dress she picked. He was being very persistent. It was so cute.

"Just a peak, my love," he said. I could practically hear the smile in his voice. I felt a weird pang in my chest. That was weird.

There was some more playful arguing between them before Feyre finally came back over to the vanity where I was sitting as Mor was doing my hair and makeup.

"He's acting like a child and I just took away his toy," Feyre mumbled, "Illyrian baby."

Mor was the first one of us who was ready. She was wearing a long black silk dress with her signature red lips. Feyre was wearing a dark blue sparkly dress. It took me a while to pick which dress to wear. Feyre insisted on the maroon one, while Mor wanted me to wear the emerald green. I am bad at making decisions so I let Elain pick and she favored the maroon one more like her sister. 

"Mother above we look hot," Mor whistled as the three of us stood in front of the giant mirror in Feyre and Rhys room. 

The door squeaked as it opened, Elain slipping through. "Stop being annoying, you swear you've never seen her dolled up before." She mumbled to whom I could only assume was Rhysand. She closed it behind her, pressing her back to it. Elain was in a pale pink dress. She favored the lighter colors. "The boys are getting rowdy and insist we go down to eat dinner."

"They're children, I swear." Feyre rolled her eyes but she was smiling, as was I. Feyre followed Elain out the door. I briefly heard Rhys say some curse words at the sight of his mate before Feyre shut the door behind her. 

Mor reached for the handle of the door but paused when she noticed I was hesitant to follow her. I could tell she was immediately worried for me. "What's wrong?" Was I really that transparent? 

I couldn't lie to her. She can always tell when I'm lying or hiding something. "I am nervous." I admitted, my hands gripped the fabric of my dress nervously. 

"Why? Has something happened?" I think I was the closet with Mor. She was there since the beginning. For the first few months after the incident I was to afraid to be around males. Mor never left my side. She didn't even know me yet she cared so much. 

"Nothing has happened. Just, something feels different." I could feel the aching in my chest. I had noticed it every time I was around Rhys and Feyre, I didn't understand. 

"A good different or a bad different?" She took ahold of my hand, a comforting gesture she did to know that she was there for me and she wasn't leaving. 

"I'm not sure. I think what I'm feeling is good but it hurts sometimes." She gave my hand a small squeeze. 

"Do you want to leave? I can winnow us out right now. No questions asked. You say the words and we're gone." I smiled at her. 

"No I don't want to leave. I just... I had that on my chest." I took a deep breath. She continued to rub her hand over mine. She always held my hand when I was anxious or feeling emotional. It was comforting, to know she was always by my side when I needed her. 

The door burst open, in came an angry looking Amren. Her hand was gripping the doorknob so hard I thought she might pull it off. "If you don't get downstairs in the next two seconds I'm killing them all." She glanced down at Mor holding my hand and Amren's face actually softened. It wasn't often I saw any other sign of emotion on her face that wasn't anger or annoyance. "What's going on? Are you alright, Y/N?"

I let out a small laugh. I love that they all worry for me. But it does get annoying the amount of times a day I hear Are you okay?  "I'm quite alright, thank you. Let's eat, I'm starving." 

Amren went first, Mor following and myself close behind. The biggest smile formed on my face the second I heard the low, loud, voices of the rest of my family downstairs. I don't even know what they were saying but Cassian's voice stood out to me. My heart sped up and I ignored it like I always did. It was a weird feeling I didn't understand. It always happened around him or even to the thought of him. 

"The night has barely begun and you're already giving me a headache," Amren grumbled as she hopped off the last step. The room grew quiet as Mor and I came into view. My eyes locked onto Cassian's first. There went that feeling again. He pushed his chair back, standing up straight. I noticed Rhysand and Azriel were standing up to. 

"Now don't stop the party on our account," Mor said. 

Rhysand was the first to speak out of the males. "You both look marvelous." He then looked at down at his mate who was sitting in the chair beside him. He must have said something to her for only her to hear because a slight blush freckled upon her cheeks. 

Azriel approached both of us, complimenting us. He hugged Mor, then looked at me for permission. I smiled at him and opened my arms to give him a hug. "Thank you, Az." The males were always hesitant to show any type of affection toward me. I understood why and I was grateful for it. 

As Azriel walked back over to where he was sitting previously at the dinner my eyes locked once more on the Illyrian general. 

"Y/N you look-" Cassian choked on his words. "I mean y-you both look, um, wow." He motioned to Mor and I. I'd never seen him so nervous. 

"Settle down Cass, you might just woo them away." Rhys said making Az laugh. Cassian's face turned red as he sat back down in his seat. Feyre swatted his arm and scolded him silently. 

The night continued on as we ate and drank. I sat at the end of the table with Elain on my right and Mor on my left. The smile on my face only grew bigger as the night went on. 

I kept the smile on my face as I glanced at Rhys and Feyre, who were talking quietly to each other, stealing kisses back and forth. I wanted that. That love that they share. That was the first time I was admitting it. I think I just realized why I felt that pang in my chest every time I looked at them together. That connection was what everyone craved. That unrelentless love. I didn't even know I was ready for that but I now realize that I do. 

I looked away from them. I couldn't watch anymore. I needed to focus on something else before they noticed my change in demeanor. 

I couldn't help but look at Cassian. He could always calm me down in the worst of times. It was like he knew I was watching him cause the second he looked at me every thing changed. It felt like the world stopped and something shifted. It started in my chest, a glowing warmth that began to sooth my aching heart, like a bandage to a wound. The warmth spread outwards, moving to my limbs and beyond my body, forming a bridge between us. 

The second that connection snapped I stood up abruptly, the chair beneath me almost falling back I pushed it back so quickly. The tears were already falling down my face. "You-" I couldn't even form a sentence. I had to cover my mouth with my hand to prevent myself from sobbing then and there. Cassian was standing too, worry all over his face. But he knew. I knew he knew. 

I couldn't breath. I knew people were calling my name. I knew Mor was by my side but everything felt numb. I needed to get out of here. 

I didn't look out as I ran out of the townhouse. Into the cold air, through the falling snow. He's my mate. Cassian is my mate.

"Gods, Y/N, you're gonna catch a cold out here." His voice alone soothed me. He appeared in front of me, wrapping a cloak around my shoulders to keep me warm. 

"How long?" I looked up at him, his face blurry through my tears. 

"Let's go back inside, I don't want you to get sick out here," he avoided the question, which only made me angry. 

"How long have you known, Cassian?" I raised my voice. I wiped my tears away so I could see him better. The sun was beginning to set but the faelights outside were shining on his face. 

"I knew the moment I saw you. It snapped immediately." He said quietly. He looked down at his feet, not daring to look at me. 

"Why didn't you tell me?" My voice was barely above a whisper. I was trying to hold it together now but my voice was failing me. 

"How could I?" Cassian looked up and it was then that I noticed the tears in his eyes also. "After what they did to you. After everything you've been through... I couldn't put that burden on you."

"A burden? You feel being my mate is a burden?" 

"No, never." He reached his hands out like he wanted to hold me, but he lowered them and took a step away from me. "I didn't want to scare you. I wanted the bond to click into place for you. I wanted you to be ready. But I will never force anything upon you. If you want to reject it, I will be okay." It was hard for him to say that. I know he didn't mean to but I could feel him send his sadness through the bond. 

I stepped directly up to him, he straighten up but didn't move away this time. He was watching me nervously. I wanted him to hold me. I needed him to make the first move. I don't want him to be scared either. 

Warmth spread through my body as he gently placed his hand on the side of my face. I let out a small cry as I placed my hand on top of his, wanting him closer. I looked up at him. "You do not scare me, Cassian. There is no one in this world that makes me feel safer than when I'm with you. And I am honored to be your mate." 

Cassian let out a cry of relief as he pulled me into his embrace. We both stood there in the snow, holding each other so tightly, crying with one another. After a few minutes he pulled away first, both his hands cupping the sides of my face now. His thumbs wiping away the few tears on my cheeks. "The honor is mine. And I will give you the everlasting love you deserve, for eternity."

"As will I," I reached up and wiped his tears also. "I will need your patience. I would like to go slow." 

Cassian's eyes went wide and he took a step back from me. "Of course." 

I laughed a little and grabbed his hand pulling him back to me. "This is just fine." He smiled and wrapped his arms around my waist. "And I would like you to kiss me." A blush formed on my cheeks as I said that. I hadn't kissed a male in over a century. 

"You sure?" He asked. I nodded slowly, he leaned in closer and when he was just mere inches away from my face I closed my eyes. Finally his lips found mine in an achingly slow, gentle kiss. He was holding me so softly, as if afraid he would hurt me. "You're it for me. I'm never letting you go." I leaned into his touch, wanting to be as close to him as possible. 

"Should we go back inside with the others?" I asked, nuzzling my face into his chest. 

"Yeah, we should." He replied but neither of us made an effort to move. "They're watching us from the window." 

I whipped my head around to look at the house behind me, multiple heads jumped away from the window. I laughed and shook my head. "They're always so nosey."

"Let's go. It's getting cold." Cassian and I held hands as we walked back inside. He took my cloak off for me and hung it up. Everyone was sitting at the table acting totally normal. 

I noticed Mor has taken my seat, pretending to be in a serious conversation with Elain. Rhys was trying to hide his smile behind his drink. Cassian pulled out the empty seat from beside him, allowing me to sit down before he took his seat. My face was red as a tomato but Cassian had a smug grin on his. They were all pretending like nothing happened, that this was all totally normal. 

"Did you guys know it started snowing outside again?" I spoke up finally, a smirk on my face.

 "What?" "No way." "I had no idea." They all said as a chorus. Then we all started laughing. Thank the mother for that. 

Cassian grabbed the edge of my seat and pulled me closer to him, wrapping an arm around the back of my chair. I grabbed his other hand and held it in my lap with both of mine. I need the connection.

"So did you all know?" I had to ask. I wasn't mad. I found it funny actually. 

"Know what?" Rhys asked, playing dumb. Then a devilish grin formed on his face. 

"I told Rhys the moment I knew, Az suspected the same day." Cassian told me. 

"I figured it out easily," Amren said, her arms crossed over her chest and a bored look on her face. "He stares at you constantly."

 "I do not!" Cassian said loudly and everyone laughed again.

"She does the same, don't worry." Mor smirked at me and my eyes went wide. 

"I do?!" I didn't even realize. My face was so red right now. 

"Oh, all the time," Feyre spoke up. Cassian squeezed my hand, begging me to look up at him. When I did his face was so full of happiness, my heart felt like it was melting. 

He leaned down and whispered in my ear, "Do I have permission to kiss your cheek?" I giggled, literally giggled. Who am I? Where did this side of me come from?

"You have my permission and may do so anytime you want," I whispered back. He kissed my cheek with glee. I was so happy. I loved the affection he was giving me. He was respecting my boundaries and accepting that I wanted to go slow. But I now understood that with me wanting to accept the bond he was gonna take any affection he could get from me. I wanted to give him everything but I need time. 

"I think we can all agree, Cass and Y/N, we are very happy for you both." Rhysand raised his glass to us. Everyone copied, raising their glasses as well. 

Acotar Masterlist

#cassian x reader #cassian #cassian fanfic #cassian imagine #cassian fanfiction #cassian acotar #acotar fanfiction #acotar #acotar imagine #a court of thorns and roses #azriel #cassian x y/n

[winterchimez]

A Little Care | Lee Sangyeon

SUMMARY: you have been awfully stressed out with work lately, and your boyfriend notices how it has affected you negatively, so he finally decides to give you some care for the night.

PAIRING: bf Sangyeon x f!reader

GENRE: smut (18+ MDNI!!)

WARNINGS: kissing, making out, fingering, oral (f!reader receiving), nipple play, cum tasting (f! reader), p in v sex, unprotected sex (pls do it safely irl folks)

WORD COUNT: 2,253

A/N: so i know i've said from the beginning how i would never write smut... well, something snapped and things happened so here we are 🤡 huge shoutout to my loves @sungbeam & @juyeonszn for proofreading this & reassuring me that it's okay ily both 😭🩵 this is my very first smut, so pls bear with me ><

update!! i've moved my nsfw works to @midnightfantasiez so do drop by and read my other works & say hi 🥰

The pouring rain that was hitting the train windows was making you ten times worse than you already were. 

It has been such a hectic few weeks for you at the office, but today was the worst of them all. Apparently, your director has been disregarding their employees' well-being and instead kept giving every single one of you more workload than you could’ve possibly endured. They have also made it clear that there will be no exception for losing the deadlines as they are now finally trying their awful best to fix up the company’s image before their subsidiary arrives in Seoul in the coming weeks for a visit. 

Hence, you have been working way overtime each day at the office, and by the time you have gotten home, it was already late enough to the point that most times, you would immediately crash onto your bed and skip dinner. 

Even spending less time with your boyfriend, Sangyeon.

You both have been in a relationship for two years and recently moved in together at the start of the year as Sangyeon managed to transfer to another branch much closer to where you lived. You were thrilled, to say the least, because that would save you plenty of time to take the one-hour bus ride to the city he used to work in back then. 

Ever since moving in with Sangyeon, he has been absolutely the best towards you. He noticed how your hours were much more tedious than he was, and he offered to cook dinner for most of the days while you were in charge of making the lunch boxes for you both since he would be home first than you most of the time. He was also already in his seventh year working for his company, so as one of the higher-ups, his timing was much more flexible, and he basically worked from home at least three times a week. 

Sangyeon has definitely noticed the change in you. Every time he brings it up, you have decided to turn him down instead, saying how you would rather not talk about it and move on to other much more pleasant topics that you both loved—music, films, and some random cafes that you both found on social media where you both would like to pay a visit on your next weekend date. 

And he respected your decision. Even during your weekly Sunday dates with one another, only a little about work would be mentioned, and you both would have the best days with one another, walking hand-in-hand through the streets while munching on your favourite bubble waffles topped off with ice cream. 

But it seemed as if something had snapped within you today. Your emotions were all over the place, and you just couldn’t wait to get back home and dive into his embrace. 

I just want some cuddles and comfort for the love of God.

“Hey, babe! Welcome home!” 

Sangyeon immediately popped his head out from the kitchen and peered through the door when he heard you unlocking the door open. He quickly approached you while turning the stove off and took your bags into his hands instead. 

“How’s my baby today?” He gave you the biggest smile that you have always loved. His radiant smile would always melt away all your negativity and make you feel much better. 

What he did not expect today was that you immediately dived into his embrace, with tears you have been desperately holding back for the entire day streaming down your face. 

He was pretty taken aback for sure, for the only time you would ever do this was when you two were both cuddling watching a sad film or when you finally got promoted at your job a year prior. Given your demeanour, he knew that something was wrong. 

“Baby… it’s ok. You know you can let it all out, right? You don’t have to hold them back no more.” He cooed while wrapping his arms around you, rubbing your back to calm you down. 

“Sangyeon… I… Why is it just so hard to be happy with my work?” You sniffed, trying your best to talk through your tears. 

“I’ve joined the company because I admired their work ethic and environment. Why is it so different from what I have imagined? Why do fame and money bring out the ugliest in people? Why do they have zero empathy towards our employees who work so hard for them?” 

You were a crying mess, and you just couldn’t stop blabbing out the most profound thoughts you have had for several weeks. You were the type to bottle up your emotions, and you would instead take them to the grave and figure them out yourself. You knew it was your bad trait, which led to you not giving yourself enough time and care towards your physical and mental well-being. And the last thing you want to do is trouble your sweetheart, who has done so much for you. 

But tonight, you have decided that enough was enough, and you couldn’t care less if you finally showed your boyfriend your weakest moment because you just did not have the strength to keep it up anymore. 

When your breathing stabilised, Sangyeon finally cups your face to lift it and look straight into his eyes. “Baby, I’m so sorry you had to go through the shittiest management and deal with their nasty jobs. I may be unable to loosen your workload, but I can surely take care of you if that’s what you want.” 

“But you always take care of me, Sangyeon.” You sniffed.

“I know. But, maybe tonight I could give you some special treatment.” 

You giggled and wiped your tears away. “Okay, and what is this special treatment? Will you give me a spa day?”

It was there, and then you noticed how your boyfriend’s eyes had somewhat slightly darkened, and he was now eyeing both your lips and neck. He then gently drops your belongings onto one of the chairs nearby, and his hands now find their way to pull down the turtleneck top you were wearing.  

“Something much better than a spa day.” 

The next thing that happens, he crashes his lips onto yours, savouring them like there’s no tomorrow. This was different, much more different than what you were used to. Sure, you both have had plenty of kisses with one another, even having slow and sensual ones where you would have each other’s tongues in your mouth. But this was different. It seemed a lot more hasty and perhaps accompanied by lust. 

The soft and sweet Sangyeon you have been accustomed to was gone. Instead, he looked like a beast, thirsty and hungry, as if he had not been fed for a while. 

From the back of your mind, you knew you had to stop and question what turned him on. But with the way his tongue wrapped around yours and he was leaving no room for you to catch your breath, it was impossible for you to think straight at the moment. 

His hands now travel down to your hips, and he eventually forces you to jump and wrap your legs around him as he lays you on the countertop. That was when one of his hands slowly reached down, massaged one of your thighs, and eventually moved to your underwear. 

You gasped and were about to stop him, but he beat you to it. He rubbed your clit, all puffy and pink and sensitive, turning him on even more than before. 

“Baby, just trust me,” he cooed and proceeded to pick up his speed. At the same time, he breaks off the kiss and moves his lips down to your neck, sucking your bare skin. Your moans were getting out of control, each getting louder as his fingers worked their way around your tight opening. When you were finally relaxed enough to his liking, he inserted two fingers into you, earning a loud gasp as you tilted your head back. His fingers plunged in and out of you, his pace increasing. 

You couldn’t think straight. How could you? When your boyfriend is literally fingering you while sucking your neck at the same time. It felt so wrong, yet it felt so good at the moment. 

“S-sangyeon… please…”

“Tell me what you want baby.” 

“I... I want you… down there…” 

Immediately, he smirked and pulled his fingers out as he positioned himself right between your thighs. “I never knew you had this within you, baby. And I’m loving it a whole lot.” 

Sangyeon brings himself towards your clit, licking and kissing while inserting his fingers back into your hole. It did not take him long to insert his tongue into your opening. 

Dear God, you were in heaven. 

“M-more.. Sangyeon… don’t stop.. aaah–” 

As he quicked his pace, and so did your breathing and moans. It wasn’t for long when you finally came, and Sangyeon did his best trying to savour all of your juices. He then lifts his head back up to look at you while diving his lips back onto yours for you to savour the taste of your own cum.

“Baby, you taste so good. How about a round two?”

One thing led to another, and now you were lying naked on your bed. You have been with Sangyeon for two years and have never been naked in front of your boyfriend. And it was also your first time to see how glorious his body proportions were and how refined his muscles and abs were. 

He slowly climbs onto you and lays his hands on your bare skin. You shivered at the contact, you never knew your boyfriend would be so skilled with those glorious hands of his, touching and massaging every bit and corner of your body. He eventually finds their way to your breasts, which you have covered up by wrapping your arms around you. He slowly takes them apart to reveal your bare breasts to him.

“Why would you cover these up? You look so goddamn beautiful to me right now.” 

His lips dove to your right while his hands massaged your left. He circled around your hardened nipples while giving them a little suck every few rounds. You did not know how much your body would react to such a simple action of his, your toes curling and arching at the stimulation. It turned you on so much, and you dug your fingers into his soft brown hair to push him down to suck on them more. 

His free hand now travels back down onto your clit, rubbing it slowly once again to keep you nice and loose. 

“Baby... do you trust me?” 

That was when you opened your eyes and clearly noticed his big bulge poking throughout his boxers, eager to make its way into you. God, you were about to lose your virginity now for real. 

“I... I don’t know, Sangyeon. I’m scared.” 

“Don’t be. I’ll be gentle. And I made you a promise that I will take care of you.” he murmured while giving a gentle squeeze to your hips. 

With that, you slowly nodded before Sangyeon eventually pulled his boxers down, revealing his hardened cock. He slowly lines himself up with your entrance, rubbing your core to capture all your wetness. 

He peered up at you. “Babe. Are you ready?” 

Blinking, you had to take a moment to suck in a massive breath before nodding your head. In one swift movement, he pushes his member into your tight walls, earning a loud whimper from you. Your body quivered at the contact, and your boyfriend came down to you, wiping your tears away. 

“Hey, it’s okay. I’ll give you a few moments to adjust. Hmm?” Even while you both were doing the deed, he was still considerate and ensured you felt comfortable and safe above anything else. 

As you tried calming your breathing down again, you finally gave him a nod, meaning he could proceed. He started slow, dragging his member in and out of your pussy for you to get used to it, all while showering you with plenty of kisses on your lips and around your face. 

When your whimpers slowly turn into soft moans, you let him know that he could pick up the pace. The pain that once bothered you was now long gone and was replaced with pleasure. Your fingers in his hair slid down to his bare back, and you couldn’t help but slightly dig your nails into his skin, which turned him on more. 

“S-sangyeon… faster…” you begged him; you were desperately trying to reach that high.

“Are you sure—you can handle it—baby?” He asked in between his groans. 

“Y-yes.. I want… more…” You replied weakly. 

Your wish was his command, and both of your moans now filled your room and the entire apartment. 

“I-I’m.. cumming.. Sangyeon..”

“Me too, babe—where—do you want me—”

“In..inside... please!” 

Immediately, after a few more thrusts, both of you came together. Sangyeon then leans down and buries his face in the crook of your neck, both of you trying your best to catch your breath. When you both finally came down on your high, your boyfriend broke off the silence. 

“So, did I somewhat manage to care for you today, princess?” 

You turned your head to lock your eyes with him before planting a soft peck on his lips. 

“You have done more than care for me, my prince.”

A/N: i will pretend that i did not write this at all goodbye—

masterlist

taglist: @deoboyznet @kflixnet @k-films @flwoie @hokupi @zzoguri @kyusqult @tinkerbell460 @cheonsafics @sulkygyu @jaerisdiction

#deoboyznet #k-vanity #k-labels #kflixnet #k-films #the boyz #tbz #the boyz x reader #the boyz imagines #the boyz scenarios #the boyz fanfic #tbz scenarios #lee sangyeon #lee sangyeon x reader #lee sangyeon smut #sangyeon smut #the boyz smut #tbz smut #sangyeon imagines #sangyeon scenarios

[songbird-of-eden]

THE AGONISING BEAUTY OF LOKI: GOD OF STORIES

**SPOILERS AHEAD!!!**

"There is a painful serendipity here."

That's the thought that kept repeating in my mind as I wiped the continous stream of tears from my eyes during the credits of Loki: Season 2.

By now, most of you will know about those heartwrenching final words from our lonely god of mischief who chose to sacrifice his own happiness, his own chance to be with the people he has grown to think of as family, to keep them safe.

If you're like me, you probably felt a deep sense of pride and sadness for Loki as he finally completed his arc and became the deity he was always meant to be; one more than worthy of brandishing Thor's hammer, who fulfilled what it meant to truly be a god.

But despite the painful and lonely ending many fans have taken from Loki's fate, I wanted to offer something of a slightly more philosophical perspective.

Loki is not alone.

Well, not entirely.

As people, we are so used to perceiving everything through our own experiences, we rarely think beyond that of thr physical. Loki, however, is a god, one who has just tapped in to every branch and root of every timeline there ever was, is, and will be.

Not only is his presence now woven into the very fibres of the multiverse, but he gets to experience the stories of each of the people he loves, endlessly.

Whilst his physical body is sat, enduring the weight of the timelines, his mind is everywhere, scattered across space and time, watching it all unfold. Life. Death. Joy. Sorrow. He is the storyteller. The sunset. The dawn rise. Every minute of every hour.

It's all him, keeping it all flowing.

He lived lifetimes with these people, stuck in the continous loop of trying to save them. Now, having done that, Loki finally gets to rest. He gets to sit down be with them, not in body, but in everything beyond a mortal's perspective: every moment and fibre of their reality.

He finally gets to be a god.

A guardian.

A hero.

And that, is so very beautiful to me.

#loki #loki series #loki season 2 #tom hiddelston loki #tom hiddleston #marvel #theory #season finale #finale

[lookbluesoup]

The Shoebill, the Phoenix, & Emet-Selch

Before Endwalker's release, I was in hardcore denial that Emet Selch was going to stay dead and a lot of that hinged on this unhinged research binge I went on about shoebills and their relationship to the phoenix.

I'm sure none of this is original speculation but I'm in a rambly mood and kinda want it saved on my blog just to have it bc I'd had a lot of fun digging into stuff back then and I'm feeling nostalgic today.

This isn't exactly current speculation or a deep dive into lore, just some collected sources that I've enjoyed pulling bits and pieces from for symbolic reasons, and hope to maybe one day create a more coherent well-rounded essay out of. Or maybe someone else will read them and write an essay!

Click the cut to read more!

Exhibit A: Through His Eyes - the Phoenix symbolism

"There was an accident," Hythlodaeus began. "During the concept's examination, a drifting soul merged with it─a soul burdened with regret, judging by the being's behavior. It rages against the pull of the Underworld." As he listened, Hades kept his gaze fixed on the creature, which flew about in a frenzy. No sooner would it dash itself against the wall in an explosion of broken feathers than it would heal itself and repeat the grisly feat. This self-destructive dance unfolded again and again, with the creature occasionally giving vent to its overflowing magical reserves─or fury, as it seemed to him─as fiery breath. Witnessing the excruciating display, his thoughts poured forth unbidden from his lips. "Consumed by the fear of death, it thrashes blindly about. It will know only pain and suffering and inflict the same upon others. A pitiful existence." "Such moving empathy. It's as if you wore the feathers yourself."

I always took this to sort of represent Emet-Selch/Hades's inability to cope with the mortal world (and his determination to 'return' from that 'death') There was an element of projection in his mind, he saw the sundered souls as lost thrashing broken things being reborn over and over just to suffer but... he was all of those, too, or even moreso. He lived life after life among men, except he knew what he'd lost and he wanted it back, desperately. He was stuck in this awful cycle he couldn't escape because he was so burdened by regret.

But that's anecdotal the whole point was the phoenix metaphor.

Exhibit B: Shoebill

The shoebill that keeps showing up in Shadowbringers is kind of a gag, of course, but it definitely felt intentional at times - it shows up when you're looking for the Exarch after he wanders off in Kholousia, effectively pointing you towards him. It could feasibly have flown anywhere over Norvrandt where it cameos, but it then shows up in The Tempest, which it should have absolutely no way of reaching. Unless it's tied to Emet-Selch in some way, perhaps as a familiar. (And of course, we see it once in Elpis, too, in Endwalker, which kinda confirms its related to Emet in some way)

In taxonomy, Shoebills are in a family all their own, though they were once classified as storks.

I honestly don't know how accurate all of THIS was, I know it takes some liberties and is pretty New-Agey, but it was something I'd found back then which fueled my theories so its worth including:

The stork was shown as the vehicle of the god Hermes in art and was often portrayed as killing snakes – the snake in this case is the symbol of kundalini energy and the ‘killing’ is not so much killing the experience as ensuring the energy became balanced. In the Orient, the stork is an enduring symbol of the immortality of the Higher spirit as opposed to the soul and the Taoists use this bird to represent both the Higher spirit and immortality. In ancient Egypt the stork symbolized the ba, which was the Higher spirit. (the ba was often shown in pictures as a bird because during out of body experiences it was the Higher spirit that left the body to roam about the spirit world. It was the objective of all Egyptians on the spiritual path to merge the ka [soul] with the ba – producing as a result the concept of akh – a living god, a person allied to the symbolic Sun.) Source X

(Liberties or not I'd honestly argue Endwalker lore kind of affirmed all of this LOL)

It's worth noting that in Greek mythology, Hermes was also a god of the Underworld - the psychopomp who guided souls to the afterlife. So there's... some really really fun stuff to dig into with Hermes and Hades being at odds in FFXIV over the fate of souls on Eitherys.

Especially when you add in the confounding element of Azem/the sun. Which brings me to...

Exhibit C: Bennu

According to Egyptian mythology, Bennu was a self-created being said to have played a role in the creation of the world. He was said to be the ba of Ra [the sun god] and to have enabled the creative actions of Atum [the primordial god in Egyptian mythology from whom all else arose.] The Greek historian Herodotus, writing about Egyptian customs and traditions in the fifth century BC, wrote that the people at Heliopolis described the "phoenix" to him. They said it lived for 500 years before dying, resuscitating, building a funerary egg with myrrh for the paternal corpse, and carrying it to the temple of the Sun at Heliopolis. The name "phoenix" could be derived from "Bennu", and its rebirth and connections with the sun resemble the beliefs about Bennu Source X

And what was Bennu?

That's right. A stork.

Ok but what should Egyptian mythology REALLY have to do with all this?

The ancient Egyptians believed that a soul (ka/ba) was made up of many parts. According to ancient Egyptian creation myths, the god Atum created the world out of chaos, utilizing his own magic. Because the earth was created with magic, Egyptians believed that the world was imbued with magic and so was every living thing upon it. When humans were created, that magic took the form of the soul, an eternal force which resided in and with every human. Source X

I mean c'mon it's not even a stretch we've been to Elpis we talked to the Ancients we fought Zodiark the literal god of Chaos and Will of the Star.

#ffxiv #ff14 #final fantasy xiv #emet selch #shoebill #endwalker spoilers #shadowbringers spoilers #shower thoughts #text #long post

[fanficshiddles]

You’ll Be Just Fine, One Shot

Thank you for the prompt! Hope you like it! toshisurtsdottir submitted: Thor saved a princess from another world who had been imprisoned and abused for centuries. Living on Asgard, she finds she's a little lost and has a hard time adjusting to the way of living on Asgard. Adding to that, she is plagued by nightmares. Luckily, Loki is there to help with all that.

-

‘Hey, Princess.’

She rolled her eyes upon hearing that name as she turned to face the God of Mischief. Who for some reason, seemed to have taken a shining to her. Not that she was complaining, really. She liked him, he was a bit cocky and mischievous, but kind and intelligent.

‘Hi, Loki.’ She put her book down and turned towards him.

‘Couldn’t sleep?’ Loki asked as he crossed the library to sit down next to her.

‘Nightmares.’ She said quietly, looking down.

‘Sometimes nightmares can be a blessing in disguise.’

She frowned at him. ‘What do you mean?’

‘Come with me.’ Loki smiled, his eyes were twinkling mischievously.

But she trusted him, for some reason. Even though many people on Asgard didn’t. But he seemed to understand her more than anyone else. While she was incredibly grateful to Thor for saving her from her home world, where she had endured terrible abuse and imprisonment for most of her life, Loki just had a different view on life and she could just speak to him about anything and everything without worry of being judged.

Loki led her through the house of Odin with ease, whilst he had lived there his whole life and knew every nook and cranny, she could only just get herself from her chambers to the library and back again without getting lost.

When he led her outside into the courtyard, she was a bit confused. But then he headed for the stable block, making her stop.

Loki noticed and turned to her. ‘Are you coming?’

‘I can’t ride…’

‘No matter. Come on.’ Loki put his hand out towards her.

She reluctantly took his hand, feeling warmed when he gave her a gentle squeeze and led her on. The way he rubbed his thumb on the back of her hand made her skin tingle. She wasn’t used to gentle touch, only harsh abuse.

When they walked into the stables, she was unsure of the horses. Especially the one Loki led her to, that was being tacked up ready for them.

‘It’s ok, he won’t hurt you. Come on, I have to show you something.’ Loki said as he coaxed her closer to the large animal.

She just warily kept herself at the other side of Loki, so he was between her and the horse. But Loki then grabbed her and with a squeak, she was carefully swung up onto the saddle.

Loki mounted the horse behind her, his arms came around her to take the reins while she held onto the front of the saddle tightly.

‘Don’t worry, we won’t go fast.’ Loki said, he could feel how tense she was.

As they headed out through the city, she began to relax more. Loki pointed out some places of importance to her, and some not so important places.

‘That’s the tavern where Thor disgraced himself. One of the many places where the Prince of Asgard is actually banned from.’ Loki chuckled.

But the main place Loki wanted to take her to, wasn’t in the city. They rode out into the mountains, going by the moonlight. She did get a little anxious, until they came across a beautiful waterfall in the middle of a mountain, the way the moonlight was shining right down on the water made it sparkle beautifully.

‘Oh wow. This place is incredible.’ She said in awe as Loki helped her down from the horse.

‘Only I know about it… well, now you do too. I’d like to keep it that way. It’s best coming here at night when the moon is out, it doesn’t quite have the same effect during the day.’

She took time taking in the surroundings, before they both ended up sitting at the side of the water. Loki was sitting crossed legged, but she had her legs down dipping into the water.

‘So, how come you were awake too?’ She asked Loki.

‘Nightmares.’ Loki said as he nudged her playfully with his arm.

‘Ah… I’m not the only one.’ She said quietly.

‘No, you’re not. Though I can’t imagine what you’ve been through. I hope you know that you will never have to fear again, you’re safe here.’ Loki put his hand onto her knee softly for a moment.

‘Thank you… I just think it will take some time. I’m still getting used to just having my freedom, not being locked away in a cell… All this space, it’s quite overwhelming in a way.’

‘That’s understandable. But in time, you will adjust. Asgardians are good people. But if you ever feel overwhelmed or like you just need some time out, this is the place to be.’ Loki smiled.

‘It is very calming here. My mind feels clear, for the first time in a long time.’ She closed her eyes and smiled. A smile that Loki had not seen from her yet, it made his heart soar with happiness that he was able to help her somewhat.

She leaned in closer to him and rested her head on his shoulder, letting out a content sigh as she closed her eyes.

‘You’ll be just fine here. I give you my word.’ Loki whispered to her.

#Loki #Tom Hiddleston #prompt #one shot #you'll be just fine

[heartsoulspiritelite]

Little! Max Caster

Caregiver! MJF (idk kinda? Not in the beginning)

Age regression- NOT SEXUAL❗️❗️❗️❗️

-

The titantron went black as the lights turned back on and revealing Max's horrified state. A million thoughts were running through Max's mind. He needed to make sure the Acclaimed were okay. He needed to find who the hell the masked men are so he could beat the living shit out of them. He's gotten fond of Caster, Bowens & Billly Gunn lately. He doesn't know why, but he has, he considers them friends. Which is weird. Old Max would never even consider sparing a glance their way. What's going on with him?

Rushing out of the ring, Max made his way through the crowd until he reached the backstage area. Running as fast as he could to reach those masked maniacs and help his friends.

Of course. Just his luck. As he finally reached them, they were gone. All that was left were the three men all layed out as a result of the viscous attack.

He felt his heart drop. This was all because of him.

"Oh God, oh God" He repeated anxiously

He was pacing back and forth. He was so frustrated with himself. He couldn't even save them because his dumbass was in shock of what was happening infront of him. Adam would be so disappointed in him. He kicked the floor in anger before crouching down and burying his head in his hands, pulling at his hair

"FUCK" He yelled in frustration

He kept yelling until he heard a soft whimper. He looked around confused until his eyes landed on Caster, who was now sitting up, looking at Max with fear in his eyes, He felt his face soften a bit.

What? Was Caster afraid of him? The same Caster who drools over Max when he's angry? The same Caster who stalks him on Twitter? The same Caster who was in awe of the video Max made for him on national 69 day?

"Caster-?" He started before he got cut off by the paramedics finally showing up.

The paramedics assisted the three men and went to go check them out. Leaving Max to follow but he was still stuck on Caster. Even as he was watching him go. The man just wasn't being himself. Sure he just got attacked but even then the moment Max layed eyes on Maxwell all his worries would go away.

He was actually concerned. Was something seriously wrong?

Unbeknownst to Maxwell. Max had accidentally slipped into his littlespace, the moment he had gotten thrown into the door -after trying to avoid it all day-, but  had passed out due to the pain, the little had endured. Obviously when he woke up, he was a bit spooked and in a lot of pain.

The Acclaimed and Daddy Ass were now out of Max's sight. They got led to Doc Sampsons office leaving Max to wither in his thoughts.

-

Back in Dr Sampsons office Billy, Anthony & Max were getting looked after. Max didn't really know what was going on but he knew this wasn't a safe spot to be little. He knew he could probably trust his friends with his secret but he was ashamed and would never dare to tell them. He saw the way Maxwell looked at him. He was a bit scared of him. The way he was yelling truly terrified little Max.

He had to find a way to get out here. He couldn't stay much longer. He has a toddlers mindset for God sake.

Doc finally let them go after about an hour. Max rushed out of there leaving his teammates behind. They knew something was wrong but whenever they asked Max ignored them, avoided eye contact and said he was fine. They decided to let him be for a bit. Maybe he was just in a lot of pain.

While Caster was walking back to the locker room he saw Maxwell run up to him.

"Hey Max im sorry dude, Are you alright" Max thought back to Adam's words. He was aloud to have more friends. It was okay.

Caster avoided him and walked around him. Nodding the slightest bit. He needed to get his stuff and leave.

MJF's eyebrows furrowed. What was going on with the man?

"Caster-" He tried again

"Stop please" Caster practically whined quietly. He felt his eyes tearing up. He just wanted to go home and snuggle up with his stuffies.

Maxwell softened at this. Caster was acting really out of character here. Max tried not to care, he really did. But he felt protective over the other man. No matter how hard he tried to hate him.

Caster took advantage of Maxwell getting caught of guard and booked it. He loved his 'boyfriend' but he couldn't he around anybody right now.

"Wait Max" Friedman tried but it was no use Caster was long gone.

Caster packed up his stuff as fast as he could, trying to change out of his clothes but it was hard. Nothing was cooperating. His tights wouldn't slip all the way off, he couldn't move properly without feeling sharp pains..

It was all to much. Caster couldn't take it anymore, he felt himself fall to the floor. Tears started staining his cheeks. He had never felt more alone than in this moment.

All of a sudden there was a soft knock on the door, he expected it to be Anthony and Billy but was shocked when he heard the voice a few seconds later.

"Max? Cmon dude. What's wrong?" Max asked insistently. He continued knocking softly until he couldn't take it anymore. He knew Caster was in there.

"Fuck it" He mumbled before opening the door slowly.

What he saw stopped him in his tracks.

Caster was bundled up in a ball, with his tights half way down his legs exposing his underwear. With tears running down his face.

Maxwell felt his heartbreak. As much as he hates to admit it. Caster is his friend. Seeing him like this is awful. Where's all the sexual remarks? What the fuck is going on?

Maxwell squatted down to match Max's height.

"Buddy I'm gonna need to tell me whats going on or I'll have to get Billy. Do you want Billy?" He asked desperately

Caster shook his head.

"Wanna go home" He whispered before stopping himself

Maxwell understood that sometimes everything was too much.

Max took a deep breath. It was now or never right?

"When im alone. I fall into a younger state of mind. It helps me. People get annoyed of me lots. So being carefree puts me at ease." He explained tensly

He shocked himself with how great his grammar was there. Maybe it was because of how terrified he was. He was slowly slipping out of it but not fully.

He waited for Maxwells judgement. To be told how stupid he is. To be told how messed up in the head he is.

He waited and waited but all that came out of Maxwells mouth was.

"Oh."  As it finally clicked in his brain.

"I'm sorry" Caster apolagized. He felt pathetic.

"What? No Caster don't ever apolagize for this" Max said sternly.

His eyes started to water, not long after his tears began to fall again.

Max reached over to Casters face and wiped his tears away gently.

"Babe I know you're worried that I'm gonna flip on out on you. But listen. I don't judge people for things like this. It's a coping mechanism and I understand that, don't worry I hate everyone equally"

Maxwell wanted to help Caster so he figured maybe using Nicknames would comfort the boy.

Caster smiled. He felt safe.

"Help me please" He asked referring to his pants that still were having around his knees.

"Alright"

Maxwell reached over and helped the little out of his pants and shirt, then put him into his other clothes. Before offering him a ride.

"I'll tell Bowens and Billy you wanted to ride with me. They may not believe me but whatever" He offered before smiling at Max.

He heard the little giggle softly, "Kay"  Caster accepted his offer with a thumbs up.

After making sure the coast was clear, He carried the little out to his rental.

He put Caster in the backseat and buckled him up. He saw the little was getting tired.

He looked through the rear view mirror and saw him yawn "Won't be long buddy, okay? We'll be there soon" He tried to reassured the boy.

He still couldn't believe this was happening. With Caster of all people. It was still odd having Caster not speak with his usual charm. But if he needed this then so be it.

"You're so handsome maxie. You know that Pal?" the little giggled before falling asleep and leaning his head against the window.

There it was. He knew it was still in there somewhere.

#max caster #mjf #aew imagine #age regression #oneshot

[mxnkeydo]

love, mom ✧ percy jackson oneshot

✧ summary when sally jackson passes away while helping him on a quest, percy begins to feel more alone than he's ever been, grieving in solitude. upon poseidon's delivery, though, percy finally allows himself to unleash his bundled emotions.

✧ genre angst, sadness

✧ word count 1.36k

✧ warnings a lot of sad, angsty, and depressed thoughts.

✧ link to main masterlist

✧ A/N writing this literally broke me to pieces, i hope ya'll enjoy this oneshot. happy birthday percy! (also pls reblog it would mean the world to me!!!)

***

The beach was calm and serene as Percy waded into the water with his jeans rolled up to his knees. Normally, he’d have brought Annabeth too, but right now he needed to be alone, he needed silence. Mourning his mother wasn’t something he could do with other people around. 

The thing was, no one would know her love the way he did. How she would drop everything in her arms, simply to give him a bear hug every time he came home from boarding school. How she would stuff blue candy into his stocking for Christmas every year without fail. How she had endured the physical and emotional abuse from his former stepfather for years, just to keep him safe. The list was endless, and the mere thought brought tears to Percy’s eyes. She had done so much for him, but when he had the chance to return the favor, he had failed. He would never be at peace with the fact that he had saved the world - twice - but he hadn’t been able to save his mother. He would give anything just to see that million dollar smile again.

But she was gone. Percy could sit at that maple tree all he wanted but it wouldn’t be the same. Because Sally Jackson would be six feet under.

“I’m sorry, Dad,” Percy whispered into the salty summer breeze, choking on the words. “I’m so, so sorry.” 

The ocean’s surface glittered under the fading daylight, like the stars had fallen from the night sky. The sky was clear of any clouds, glowing with a cerulean hue. The water’s constant ‘shhh’ used to be like a soothing lullaby, but now it just made him more restless than ever. Percy didn’t understand how the world could be so beautiful when his mother, the most badass, the funniest, the kindest woman to ever exist, was dead.

That ‘shh’ grew louder and louder until it filled his head. A gentle wave splashed against his legs and receded back into the depths of the waters. Percy looked down, and with furrowed brows, picked up the letter floating at his feet. 

As he turned it over in his hands, the envelope dried off so the sentence on the back was legible:

To Percy, my entire world, my everything.

Without a doubt, the letter was sent from his father, Poseidon, god of the sea. But the words were in his mother’s handwriting. His hands wavered as he tore the envelope open, revealing the coffee-colored paper inside.  He wasn’t exactly sure if he was mentally prepared to read it, but with a deep breath, he unfolded the paper:

My dearest Percy,

I pray that this letter never reaches your hands, that your father will destroy it after your successfully completed mission. I’m hoping you’ll never have to read this letter, because I’ll most likely be dead.

But if you are reading this, Percy, know that I was the proudest mother to ever live. Ever since the moment I held you in my arms, I have been more proud than you’ve ever known. Percy, you have done many great things in such a short lifetime; you’ve gone through two great wars, you’ve survived through the darkest of times, and you have fought for everyone you love. I am not only proud to call you my son, but in awe that you have accomplished so much.

It was like his mother was right next to him, whispering into his ear as she held him close. Percy didn’t even notice he was crying until his teardrops splattered onto the letter. He didn’t bother to wipe them away and kept reading:

Percy, I know you; I am your mother, after all. I know you’re probably beating yourself up about my death. You know I’m right.

Percy couldn’t help but let out a choked laugh; it was true, Sally knew him too well and they both knew it.

Please remember that I am the one that insisted on helping you, even when you protested against it. If there’s anyone to blame for my demise, it is me. You have done nothing wrong. 

And there it was. That was the sentence that had Percy sobbing horrible, choppy, heartbroken sobs. That was the sentence that broke him entirely. He gripped the letter like it was life or death, his hands shaking more violently than ever. His eyes were so blurry from the wall of unshed tears that he could barely read.

You have done nothing wrong.

No one knew better than Percy how refreshing it was to hear those five words after years of thinking he screwed up. Not once in his life had anyone said those words to him. Not until now.

You have done nothing wrong.

Percy gulped and moved on to the next paragraph:

Percy, I don’t want you to cry. Wipe away your tears. When you think of me, I want you to remember all the good times we spent together. Remember how we went on an entirely blue diet just to spite Gabe? How, every summer, we’d go down to Montauk and talk all night in that cabin? When you think of me, I want you to smile, not cry. I hate seeing you cry. It’s the worst feeling for a mother, you know that?

What’s worse is losing the most important person in your life, he thought desolately. Still, he wiped away the hot tears rolling down his cheeks.

Percy, listen to me. I want you to live your life to its fullest. Go to college with Annabeth, make new friends, get married, have kids. There is a reason I named you Perseus. He was the only hero to get a happy ending. I wish the very same for you.

Take care of your sister for me, Percy. Sometimes, I used to watch you play with her, rock her to sleep in your arms while you sang a little lullaby. I know you will be the best big brother ever to her. The way she looks at you, like you’re her hero – it warms my heart. Be good to Paul, too. Don’t let him get too hung up over my passing. Tell him to move on. And you move on too, Percy. Do not be angry with the gods for not preventing my death. Do not be angry with yourself. It is not anyone’s fault but my own. Move on, and all I ask is you remember me from time to time, as I will think of you too. 

Percy’s hand flew to his mouth. Before, he was only in shock that his mother was gone, but this letter made it seem much more real. He felt like he was grasping for something that didn’t exist.

I love you, Percy. I love you so, so much, more than you will ever know. I will be watching over you as you grow, and no matter what, I will always be with you in spirit. Be brave, be strong, and be kind, Percy. I know you will achieve great things. 

Love, Mom.

Percy didn’t care whether he got strange looks or not; he burst into messy sobs again, trembling. He lost track of time as he wept for the woman who had sacrificed so much, too much, just for his well being. He wept for the Sally Jackson-shaped hole he had in his life, and for the fact that no one else would be able to fill it. 

He didn’t know how much time had passed until he felt the warmth of his girlfriend’s arms around his neck and he looked up in surprise, his eyes still swimming with tears. Annabeth’s eyes were red and puffy too, he noticed, as he buried his face in the crook of her neck. He snaked one arm around her waist, pulling her close, and gripped the letter in the other. Percy took in deep breaths of the familiar salty air as he looked up to the darkened sky.

There, he saw a crescent moon. It was like a smile, Percy thought. Maybe his mother was smiling down on him. Percy hugged Annabeth tighter as he breathed,

“I love you too, Mom.”

#pjo #percy jackson #sally jackson #angst #death #annabeth chase #percy jackon and the olympians #birthday oneshot #birthday #we love a lil angst don't we #who am i kidding this is a lot of angst-

[furiousunfish]

i've finally found you [Joongdok].

A Joongdok fanfiction based on a post-winning battle with Final Dragon, Chapter 409 (I think so). However, Kim Dokja really died this time.

<damn i should write about orv more>

-

Yoo Joonghyuk breathed a sigh of relief. He made it. The Regressor had found a way to meet death.

Can I finally rest? There will be no repeating scenarios, watching one by one his comrades die as time goes by, and enduring all sorrow endless times.

Yoo Joonghyuk was really glad. He thought death was an impossibility. More than eighteen hundred rounds of life he had encountered, becoming new realities to live with, causing endless despair at every failure. Not even Joonghyuk succeeded in realizing his wish.

In fact, that hope is not only expected by Yoo Joonghyuk alone.

He yearns in saving Kim Dokja, an anomaly that appears in his third recurring life. That bastard is too pretentious. Sacrificing himself in completing the scenario one last time in order to keep his comrades alive.

Stupid bastard, he thought. Looks like I caught it too. In fact, he also makes the decision that Dokja fears the most during the third round, which is to restart life. Yoo Joonghyuk couldn't accept it. After all the hardships they have been through together, why was Kim Dokja so reckless to sacrifice himself? Of course, they survived…

…physically, not emotionally. Yoo Joonghyuk understood this very well.

He did not know the condition of his friends. After Kim Dokja was completely killed, Yoo Joonghyuk instantly activated the regressor attribute, causing him to be stranded in the fourth round. However, the situation and conditions were different from the start.

Signs of Kim Dokja's life have never been found anymore whenever in the fourth, fifth, sixth… even up to the thousandth round. Even Yoo Joonghyuk honestly knew, that in the next rounds, Kim Dokja would never exist. It's just that a piece of hope in the heart doesn't want to admit it. He had pushed Yoo Joonghyuk into an endless vicious loop, struggling in a similar world apocalypse story, as well as looking for the whereabouts of a former companion until a brilliant idea came to him.

Yoo Joonghyuk was fed up.

He decided to find a way to bring Kim Dokja back from the dead.

Defrauding the law of death by making an agreement with the Underworld Gods—Hades, Pluto, Anubis, Freya… Yoo Joonghyuk didn't care who it is anymore. The regressor has come to search for Kim Dokja's soul, perhaps left trapped in one of the domains of the God of the Underworld and yet to find the best way to escape. One god after mythology-grade gods is found, annihilating them whenever he did not obtain the desired answer, deafening the ears from the words of truth that are spoken with trepidation.

[Yoo Joonghyuk's incarnation… even I, the God of Death, can't find him in the ocean of the deceased.]

Hades, followed by Demeter was looking at him with an unreadable expression. Kim Dokja was no longer a successor to the Underworld. They didn't even know that bastard—Joonghyuk alone understood because Kim Dokja never existed. Not giving up, the regressor returns to the God of the Underworld from diverse world mythologies, constantly questioning the existence of his companion, even though it ends in nothing.

Therefore, Yoo Joonghyuk once again made one crucial decision.

He decided to die.

No matter how outlandish it is, Yoo Joonghyuk kept trying. The regressor visited the highest tier constellations countless times, telling them to terminate him as quickly as possible.

[Even when asking for death, you are still arrogant.]

"Just kill me," he said coldly and sharply. "As painful as possible, if you can."

[The audacity of this human…]

As soon as Joonghyuk blinked, he was already on the next round.

Damnit. His regression attribute was indeed a curse. In fact, Yoo Joonghyuk only wished a thing—seeing his beloved bastard once again. His journey is simply meaningless without the presence of Kim Dokja.

Is it that impossible to achieve…?

Nevertheless, it is already over. Perhaps that bastard will appear again in front of him from now on. Yoo Joonghyuk constantly wondered whether he would enter the Underworld, Heaven, or Hell…

…but then, he wasn't in any of those places. Yoo Joonghyuk found himself inside a cubicle with white walls on four sides. His dark net widened his eyes, searching for clues that might give the regressor some insight into his current location. His eyes glanced to the corner of the room; there was a small set of tables and chairs, and… a boy who is hiding under the table.

Yoo Joonghyuk was never good at talking to children.

"…hey." The child doesn't seem conscious. Yoo Joonghyuk walked over. He then crouched down, trying to see the little boy from the small space under the table. The former regressor spoke again. "…hello.

Joonghyuk felt a little bit relieved. He had to ask something.

"What place is this?" he asked bluntly. "Can… can you tell me—please?"

Did he pronounce it correctly? Yoo Joonghyuk hoped he didn't look frightening to him. Kim Dokja always said that his forehead was furrowed all the time, making him look unfriendly. Meanwhile, the master seemed very liked by the children. Shin Yoosung and Lee Gilyoung…they are very attached to Kim Dokja, even quarrelling over a place when sleeping together.

Honestly, Yoo Joonghyuk felt a little envious.

"Who are you?"

As soon as the boy put his long bangs behind his ear, Yoo Joonghyuk balled. He looked back at the familiar face he had been lingering for so long.

"…Kim Dokja."

"How do you know my name?" he asked innocently. "How did you get here? I didn't see you come in through the door."

There's no door here. At least, Yoo Joonghyuk couldn't find it. Suddenly, he was already here, with a small version of Kim Dokja. He was like an apparition with an unfinished business, leading him to little Kim Dokja.

Is he the reincarnation of Kim Dokja?

"I also do not know." After that, they were silent for a while.

Yoo Joonghyuk glanced at the child. The little Kim Dokja is frail, just like the Kim Dokja he met before, but almost always manages to save everyone without exception. Kim Dokja has a thin body, a slim waist, and an annoying expression that never subsides.

One more. These two Kim Dokjas also always had wounds all over their bodies—

—wait a second. Wound?

"Why is your body covered in bruises?" Yoo Joonghyuk asked furiously. Even when Kim Dokja was injured back then, he always gritted his teeth in annoyance. His bitterness then is used to overthrow every perpetrator who manages to slash and cram scratches on his companion's body. Well, Kim Dokja couldn't possibly be aware of what he did. That bastard is dense as hell. Perhaps he just thought he was more likely a thirsty killing machine. "Who did this to you?"

Little Kim Dokja hesitated to answer. Yoo Joonghyuk slowly folded the boy's long sleeves up, and then watched him with discomfort. Who could be so heartless to such a small child?

He suddenly remembered his intention to kill Shin Sooyoung in the third round.

Kim Dokja really changes him.

"It's okay," little Kim Dokja finally spoke. "I'm just a little naughty. So… please don't cry."

Cry? Yoo Joonghyuk was stunned. Is it even possible…

"Your eyes are teary," the child said again. He then spread his arms, moving to hug Yoo Joonghyuk's big body. The master froze. "Everything is alright…"

Either he was crying because he saw the bruises all over the child's body, or he was the one who had found Kim Dokja after countless attempts.

He's really grateful. His arms also moved around the little Kim Dokja, giving him the warmth he had longed for years.

Yoo Joonghyuk couldn't help but smile.

I've finally found you again, Kim Dokja.

#joongdok #orv fanfic #angsty #my writing #yoo joonghyuk #kim dokja #orv au #orv fanfiction #joonghyuk is whipped #kim dokja x yoo joonghyuk #donghyuk #jongdok #au fanfiction #au fic #oneshot #ways of survival #omniscient reader #yu joonghyeok

[flaresanimedump]

Ranpo who's madly in love with Fukuzawa but thinks he can't have him. Ranpo devoting his life to Fukuzawa but resigning himself to live the life Fukuzawa infers he should - one day Ranpo will get married and Fukuzawa will retire and they'll only see each other every other weekend and Ranpo will live for those rare moments. He'll accept it when he loses Fukuzawa and go on living.

But every time something really, life-threateningly bad happens he fucks it up. He goes mad and challenges enemies who could crush him if he was just a little less manic, he jeopardizes the things Fukuzawa holds dear, he steps into the line of fire himself rather than let Fukuzawa fall.

After one of these times, after he's nearly died saving Fukuzawa and he hates himself for it because despite his desperation in the moment he knows what his death would do to Fukuzawa, when Fukuzawa's incensed and doesn't understand why he would endanger himself when he knows Fukuzawa would never recover if Ranpo died to save him, after, when he's safe in Fukuzawa's arms again and his own resolutions come crashing back into him too late to matter, the vision finally shatters.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, his voice choked and shaking. "I can't love you the way you want me to."

It's true and he knows it. He can't. He's failed. He'll always throw himself on the fire for Fukuzawa. He can't see him as a shield or a shelter easily cast aside. He can't see him as a guardian to eventually move on from. He's not even a god, just a man who Ranpo can't bare to let go.

Fukuzawa who never really thought all that hard about the way he loved Ranpo, only how best to do so. How best to defend him, how best to support him, how best to build the world around him. How best to clear the path for the life he deserved. How, dear god how, to show him affection as anyone else would.

Fukuzawa who does all of these things to the best of his ability with his whole heart and then some because it feels like something's missing. There's something else he should be doing. Ranpo flourishes but stops short of some things too soon. His eyes linger on a couple holding hands only for him to turn his eyes away, downcast. He never looks interested in anyone, but he stares at couples so longingly Fukuzawa can't help but notice.

When Ranpo moves out he does it with great fanfare and a lot of whining. But it's the heavy weight in his steps that rings in Fukuzawa's ears, a trudge of endurance, of defeat.

And his touch always seems to linger, the glide of his fingers more of a caress at times over Fukuzawa's. There's something delicate and strange to it he's never experienced before. Something longing, but for what he's not sure.

So when Ranpo says I can't love you the way you want me to he doesn't understand. That's exactly how he's always felt, but how he's always felt isn't how Ranpo means it. He can't see how it's even relevant now, when Fukuzawa's quick reflexes were the only thing that kept Ranpo's heart from stopping moments before.

He grips Ranpo's shoulders and shakes him, desperate to make him promise never to do this again. "I don't care what happens to me as long as you survive! You have to let me protect you!"

"I care!" Ranpo shouts back.

Fukuzawa still doesn't understand. People willing to hide behind him, to let him protect them. And there's no one he wants to do it for more than Ranpo. "Why!? Why would it be so hard for you to-"

Ranpo surges up and silences him with a bruising open-mouthed kiss. Fukuzawa tastes salt and fire and brimstone and blood, and when Ranpo pulls away his cheeks are shining with tears.

"I'm sorry." Ranpo says again, his voice tight as Fukuzawa stares at him wide-eyed.

Ranpo burrows his face into Fukuzawa's chest and shakes. Slowly, more out of reflex than thought, Fukuzawa settles a hand on his shoulders.

He's quiet for a long time.

"No," he says at last. "I'm sorry." His hand shifts to stroke Ranpo's head, the other coming around him. "I've been selfish, haven't I?"

#fukuran #ranfuku #ranpo edogawa #edogawa ranpo #yukichi fukuzawa #fukuzawa yukichi #tantei soujin #headcanons and aus

[kewltie]

when i write something i tend to have a goal, or actually a specific moment or scene, i aim toward. for this specific scene in stepdad au i had this image of izuku surrounded by his sleeping children and talking about how he wants to protect his kids from becoming like their villainous sire so that they dont walk the same path as him. it was very clear in my head and i knew what i wanted but i have to build to get there.

i like nontraditional family unit as someone who grew up with both parents, divorced, and then raised by a single mother i have a lot of respect for the nontraditional family unit!! stepdad au is one of part of many of AUs that centered around that lol. i like that katsuki who literally been a bachelor most of his life suddenly stumbled his way into like a family and now he's juggling parenthood to these small tyrants and HE'S TRYING HIS BEST.

i think i talked about this before how im not a big fan of kidfics bc they dont really have much of personality and that they're more used as a tool to get the couple together rather their own char arc so for me it was really important that each of the numbers had a very distinct characteristics that you can pick them apart among the crowd. i wanted each kid bounce off e/o bc hey they're siblings should act like ones and have a storyline outside of bkdk's love story. so theres a lot of focus on the kids as much as bkdk's storyline bc izuku (and now katsuki also) world revolves around them. izuku put away his mate/husband to SAVE HIS KIDS!!

heroes comes in all shapes and sizes and not all heroes wear cape, ya know the quote but it's exactly what it is here. izuku's path didn't lead to ofa and becoming a hero but in his own way, even tho it seemingly small in the grand scheme of things, he put everything on the line to get his kids away from their villainous sire so they wont fall on the same dark path as him. he has no quirk and didnt have support from anyone for a long time but he planned this for many years just to finally put his husband away like idk that's fucking stone cold. izuku hid his true intentions and acted the part of the good spouse, the good omega, and kept producing kids and raising them for his mate but he was actually masterminding a plan to bring his husband down and escape with his kids like HE DID THAT!!! ON HIS OWN!!! how could ppl not admire that audacity, that fucking bravery????

even tho izuku did all that, he feels like it wasnt enough bc how long it took the plan to took shape like izuku didn't just come with this plan in a day and execute it within the same week or months. HE PLANNED THIS FOR YEARS AND YEARS and finally he got enough tools in his arsenal to pulled it off (evidences and waiting for his children to be old enough to carry it out). thats pretty badass but izuk doesnt see it that, its the duty of the parents to protect their kids and izuku think he's just doing what he must!!! but even then he wishes he didnt have to wait that long to carry them away from the abuse of their sires but for his plan to work he had to stay lowkey, underestimated, and the good spouse/omega so he had to watched his children suffered but he cant do much against it. it's a hard thing to watch and endure and izuku will always regret how he couldnt do much for them and i think even tho he managed to save his kids and put away his husband, it always live in him how he could HAVE DONE MORE (even tho unlikely). so when katsuki says something about thinking he's doing just fine in his eyes, it's someone ELSE not him that tell him hey, you're not such a terrible parent and izuku's guilt lessen just a lil.

izuku isnt the perfect parent but he's trying and katsuki definitely isnt made for parenting either but he's learning AND TOGETHER they're learning to be what the numbers need and this journey is what tied them together and fall in love even tho katsuki is like half way there already but god, izuku showing him that even with no quirks, izuku can do crazy shits for his children!!!!!!

#on writing #verse: stepdad au

[yieldfruit]

Why is election a controversial doctrine among Christians? What is it?

Election...God has an elect. This is biblical and the word "elect" can be found many times throughout Scripture when referring to those who are his. For example:

As the elect of God, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with hearts of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Colossians 3:12

I endure everything for the sake of the elect, that they also may obtain the salvation that is in Christ Jesus with eternal glory. 2 Timothy 2:10

Will not God give justice to his elect, who cry to him day and night? Will he delay long over them? Luke 18:7

What then? What the people of Israel sought so earnestly they did not obtain. The elect among them did, but the others were hardened Romans 11:7

Think about this, when we pray for others' salvation we pray for the Holy Spirit to do that work in their heart and life. We understand it is the Holy Spirit who opens up/softens hearts. I do believe everyone chooses whom they will serve (God or Satan) and if anyone is in Hell it is due to their own choosing, "The coming of the lawless one will be accompanied by the working of Satan, with every kind of power, sign, and false wonder, and with every wicked deception directed against those who are perishing, because they refused the love of the truth that would have saved them. For this reason God will send them a powerful delusion so that they believe the lie, in order that judgment may come upon all who have disbelieved the truth and delighted in wickedness." 2 Thessalonians 2:9-12. I believe God can and does harden hearts that do not/will not choose him. "And I will harden Pharaoh’s heart, and he will pursue them, and I will get glory over Pharaoh and all his host, and the Egyptians shall know that I am the LORD.” Exodus 14:4. God will use even hardening for his glory.

God knows those who are his/those who love the truth that saves them/those that will forsake their sin and repent, and those are the elect. Remember God is outside of time, so he knows the beginning from the end and those who will call upon him to be saved and those who love the lie rather than the truth. God is not, metaphorically speaking, biting his nails in heaven worried about who will choose him. His Word says he desires none would perish and all would come to repentance, we know that is his heart (2 Peter 3:9).

We are not robots, God's Word is filled with admonition to turn from sin and abide in him! "Wash the evil from your heart, O Jerusalem, so that you may be saved. How long will you harbor wicked thoughts within you?" Jeremiah 4:14. "And he said to all, 'If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.'" Luke 9:23, etc. There is SO much in his Word about responding to him. "But if you refuse to serve the LORD, then choose today whom you will serve. Would you prefer the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates? Or will it be the gods of the Amorites in whose land you now live? But as for me and my family, we will serve the LORD.” Joshua 24:15.

This is a hard question to answer for many and many people are divided about it. I am not a Calvinist nor an Armenian, I follow Christ and the Bible alone - no man, no man's doctrine or creeds. I follow Christ and his Word. A Christian. I prayed for God to give me mercy and grace in answering this and to answer with, "What does your Word say, Lord?" That's my heart's desire - Lord, what does your Word say about your heart in this? I want to get it right, nevertheless I understand my mere humanity/human understanding in this area that can be hard to wrap our minds around (just like the thought of Eternity can be hard to wrap our head around). Where I am wrong, may he correct. I knows he loves me and will correct where I am wrong, and I am saved and kept by grace. I answer this question with reverence, but wanting to get what is in the Word right. I side with Charles Spurgeon and John MacArthur on this issue, both men who are Reformers as I am and understand that this can be a bit of an issue on Earth where there are two tracks that seem to be running parallel to each other, yet they will convene in Eternity. "Someday we will know just as we are known." 1 Corinthians 13:12. I trust the Lord, he knows those who are his, those who are not, I trust how he opens hearts, how he hardens hearts, that he desires all to come to repentance and he takes no delight in the death of the wicked, and how he works ALL of this together for his glory.

[dfroza]

Today’s reading from the ancient books of Proverbs and Psalms

for march 28 of 2024 with Proverbs 28 and Psalm 28, accompanied by Psalm 10 for the 10th day of Astronomical Spring and Psalm 88 for day 88 of the year (with the consummate book of 150 Psalms in its 1st revolution this year)

[Proverbs 28]

The wicked run away even when no one is chasing them;

the right-living, however, stand their ground as boldly as lions.

Where there is rebellion in a land,

there are many petty and contending rulers;

But where there is a wise and intelligent leader,

peace and order endure.

A poor person who oppresses others who are poor

is like a driving rain that destroys the crops and leaves no food.

Those who turn their backs on God’s teaching applaud the wicked,

while those who observe His instruction oppose them at every turn.

Evil people are not able to understand justice,

but those who pursue the Eternal understand it completely.

It is better to be a pauper walking in integrity

than a dishonest man, even if he is rich.

Whoever follows God’s teaching is a wise child,

but the one who spends time with gluttons and drunks disgraces his parents.

Anyone who increases his wealth by charging a high rate of interest

is only collecting it for another who will deal more liberally with the poor.

The one who turns his ear from hearing God’s instruction

will find that even his prayers are detestable to God.

Whoever tries to deceive a good person into taking the path of evil

will fall into the pit he himself made,

but the truly honest shall be the heirs of all that is good.

A rich man may be wise in his own sight,

but a perceptive pauper will see right through him.

There is much glory when just men celebrate;

but when the wicked gain power, people take cover.

Whoever tries to hide his sins will not succeed,

but the one who confesses his sins and leaves them behind will find mercy.

Happy is the one who always fears the Lord,

but the person who hardens his heart to God falls into misfortune.

Like a roaring lion or a charging bear,

so is a wicked man ruling over an impoverished people.

A leader who lacks intelligence cruelly oppresses the people,

but one who hates corruption will prosper and live a long life.

A man guilty of murder is a fugitive,

fleeing to the nearest hole in the ground but not escaping death’s cold pit.

Don’t do anything to save him.

Whoever walks in honesty will be safe,

but whoever travels the crooked path will suddenly fall.

Whoever cultivates his land will have plenty of food in the harvest,

but whoever cultivates worthless ventures will have poverty in abundance.

A reliable person will not escape blessings,

but one who wants to get rich quick will not escape trouble.

Showing favoritism is not good;

some will desert the truth for a measly crust of bread.

A greedy person is in a hurry to get rich,

but he is ignorant of the loss that is about to overtake him.

A person who offers constructive criticism will, in the end, be appreciated more

than a person who engages in empty flattery.

One who robs his father or his mother

and says, “There’s nothing wrong with that! I had it coming!”

walks in the company of murderers.

When the greedy want more, they stir up trouble;

but when a person trusts in the Eternal, he’s sure to prosper.

Anyone who puts confidence only in himself is a fool,

but the person who follows wisdom will be kept safe.

Whoever gives to the poor will have what he needs,

but the one who shuts his eyes to their plight will face curse after curse.

When the wicked have the upper hand, people go into hiding;

but when they perish, the good folk will begin to increase.

The Book of Proverbs, Chapter 28 (The Voice)

[Psalm 28]

A song of David.

Eternal One, I am calling out to You;

You are the foundation of my life. Please, don’t turn Your ear from me.

If You respond to my pleas with silence,

I will lose all hope like those silenced by death’s grave.

Listen to my voice.

You will hear me begging for Your help

With my hands lifted up in prayer,

my body turned toward Your holy home.

I beg You; don’t punish me with the most heinous men.

They spend their days doing evil.

Even when they engage their neighbors in pleasantness,

they are scheming against them.

Pay them back for their deeds;

hold them accountable for their malice.

Give them what they deserve.

Because these are people who have no respect for You, O Eternal,

they ignore everything You have done.

So He will tear them down with His powerful hands;

never will they be built again.

The Eternal should be honored and revered;

He has heard my cries for help.

The Eternal is the source of my strength and the shield that guards me.

When I learn to rest and truly trust Him,

He sends His help. This is why my heart is singing!

I open my mouth to praise Him, and thankfulness rises as song.

The Eternal gives life and power to all His chosen ones;

to His anointed He is a sturdy fortress.

Rescue Your people, and bring prosperity to Your legacy;

may they know You as a shepherd, carrying them at all times.

The Book of Psalms, Poem 28 (The Voice)

A note from The Voice translation:

This Davidic psalm pleads with God to spare him and repay his enemies. It would be difficult to locate this psalm in any one event. During his life David faced many threats from different enemies; not only were these threats from outside his realm, but some of his most difficult challenges came from inside his own family.

[Psalm 10]

Why, O Eternal One, are You so far away?

Why can’t You be found during troubling times?

Mean and haughty people hunt down the poor.

May they get caught up in their own wicked schemes.

For the wicked celebrates the evil cravings of his heart

as the greedy curses and rejects the Eternal.

The arrogance of the wicked one keeps him from seeking the True God.

He truly thinks, “There is no God.”

His ways seem always to be successful;

Your judgments, too, seem far beyond him, out of his reach.

He looks down on all his enemies.

In his heart he has decided, “Nothing will faze me.

From generation to generation I will not face trouble.”

His mouth is full of curses, lies, and oppression.

Beneath his tongue lie trouble and wickedness.

He hides in the shadows of the villages,

waiting to ambush and kill the innocent in dark corners.

He eyes the weak and the poor.

Ominously, like a lion in its lair,

he lurks in secret to waylay those who are downtrodden.

When he catches them, he draws them in and drags them off with his net.

Quietly crouching, lying low,

ready to overwhelm the next by his strength,

The wicked thinks in his heart, “God has forgotten us!

He has covered His face and will never notice!”

Arise, O Eternal, my True God. Lift up Your hand.

Do not forget the downtrodden.

Why does the wicked revile the True God?

He has decided, “He will not hold me responsible.”

But wait! You have seen,

and You will consider the trouble and grief he caused.

You will impose consequences for his actions.

The helpless, the orphans, commit themselves to You,

and You have been their Helper.

Break the arm of the one guilty of doing evil;

investigate all his wicked acts;

hold him responsible for every last one of them.

The Eternal will reign as King forever.

The other nations will be swept off His land.

O Eternal One, You have heard the longings of the poor and lowly.

You will strengthen them; You who are of heaven will hear them,

Vindicating the orphan and the oppressed

so that men who are of the earth will terrify them no more.

The Book of Psalms, Poem 10 (The Voice)

[Psalm 88]

For the worship leader. A song of the sons of Korah accompanied by dance. A contemplative song of Heman the Ezrahite.

O Eternal One! O True God my Savior!

I cry out to You all the time, under the sun and the moon.

Let my voice reach You!

Please listen to my prayers!

My soul is deeply troubled,

and my heart can’t bear the weight of this sorrow. I feel so close to death.

I’m like the poor and helpless who die alone,

left for dead, as good as the unknowable sea of souls lying under our feet,

Forsaken by Him and cut off from His hand,

abandoned among the dead who rest in their graves.

And You have sent me to be forgotten with them,

in the lowest pits of the earth,

in the darkest canyons of the ocean.

You crush me with Your anger.

You crash against me like the relentless, angry sea.

[pause]

Those whom I have known, who have been with me,

You have gathered like sheaves and cast to the four winds.

They can’t bear to look me in the eye, and they are horrified when they think of me.

I am in a trap and cannot be free.

My eyes grow dim, weakened by this sickness;

it is taking my strength from me.

Like a worn cloth, my hands are unfolded before You daily, O Eternal One.

Are You the miracle-worker for the dead?

Will they rise from the dark shadows to worship You again?

[pause]

Will Your great love be proclaimed in the grave

or Your faithfulness be remembered in whispers like mists throughout the place of ruin?

Are Your wonders known in the dominion of darkness,

or is Your righteousness recognized in a land where all is forgotten?

But I am calling out to You, Eternal One.

My prayers rise before You with every new sun!

Why do You turn Your head

and brush me aside, O Eternal One?

Why are You avoiding me?

Since the days of my youth, I have been sick and close to death.

My helpless soul has suffered Your silent horrors;

now I am desperate.

Your rage spills over me like rivers of fire;

Your assaults have all but destroyed me.

They surround me like a flood, rising throughout the day,

closing in from every direction.

You have taken from me the one I love and my friend;

even the light of my acquaintances are darkness.

The Book of Psalms, Poem 88 (The Voice)

A note from The Voice translation:

This individual lament was composed by someone afflicted with a grave illness, feeling lonely and abandoned by God. This song is reminiscent of Job’s sufferings.

[coveholdenmyluv]

R. Braun - Honey Soaked Promises

synopsis. In which you reminisce on your quest for revenge, irrigated with broken promises and fermented with betrayal, allowing you to act as the judge between life or death for yourself and the viper dressed in the skin of the love of your life.

— or alternatively, in which you make the stupid decision to fall in love with the wrong person on your journey to freedom...

Oh well, you'll just have to kill him now.

series masterlist

chapter warnings. slight manga/ending spoilers, foreshadowing, fluff

chapter synopsis. During your very first look into your past, you plan your escape from your personal hell with Stefan and Cielo. Was that your biggest mistake yet?

I| Trepidation. 10.5k words.

"You ain't gonna die, you sappy girl, I won't let him harm you both. I promise, no bullets will be goin' into either of your heads."

Oh, Stefan. He always keeps his promises… Can you?

Honey; such a sweet and savory essence. Seemingly everlasting on the tongue, for even if doused in a reservoir, the stubborn residuum remains.

Honey is entirely what you descried, from the age of ten to however much longer the gods above will allow your heart to beat. It's all you ever saw and all you ever want to see; you realize.

Honey is what you see right now. His eyes, albeit drained and tainted with Titan marks, stare directly into your own. They beg and plead for you to save yourself, for he could not bear to let the sole person that kept him from ending his own life, depart from this cruel world. Because as cruel and bloodcurdling as it may be, the world can be beautiful and altruistic. He's seen it himself. And he knows, he can feel that all the war and carnage will soon come to an end. Scars, emotional and physical, will remain but allow for mending and tranquility. He wants that, yearns to finally conclude the great torment that he's endured since childhood but more than anything, he wishes that for you.

He wants you to let go, and the irony isn't lost in him as he recalls the fact of how laboriously he prayed for anything but that, just four years in the past. He knows that you haven't had the courage to, that you've held onto every memory, every feeling and every touch you've shared with each other, no matter how hard you tried for the opposite. He knows because he too has clutched them just as close. The only difference was that unlike yourself, he never once attempted or even wanted to forget.

So as you hang upside down, with one hand grasping his tighter than ever before, your fingers reminiscent of interlacing threads of fate. Your tresses falling into view and drifting in every which direction the wind sways it, and the wire that tethers you to the enormous bones that assemble Eren Jaeger's final Titan, straining. You realize that you're being given a choice.

Will you let go of the only man you've ever truly loved? That man that has been the core cause of the vast anguish that has plagued not only your life but the lives of those you adore dearly and leave a place for inside of your heart. The man with cavernous honeysuckle pools for eyes and short but soft sandy blonde strands of hair. The only man you've ever kissed.

The only man you ever want to kiss.

Or will you let yourself fall with him? Fall into the depths of you don't even know what it is that you'd fall into; all you know is that you'd be falling with him. Sink into his arms before the angel of death embraced you both just as tightly.

Will you let go or will you fall with him?

But before you make that choice, let's take a look at the journey that has lead you to this very moment, shall we?

Year 845, The Underground City. 

The second underground city located within the interior of Wall Maria, or more specifically, beneath. A crowded old city where the rats laid, never to catch sight of or feel the burn of the suns rays or the fresh breeze carding through their hair. Buildings stacked upon buildings and the only source of light being fire, whether originating from lanterns or arbitrary flames ensued by citizens in their fits of rage.

You could've considered it a tight knit community wherein everyone knew of everyone. Some would greet in passing and some simply wouldn't. It was not abnormal to see brawls on the cobblestone streets, it's not as if anyone was there to put a stop to them.

Otherwise, known as home.

Being so close to the outer wall and underground seemed to have deemed the population a lost cause in the eyes of authority, if any, in the underground.

You couldn't have fretted over that fact too much. It's what had allowed you to live as long as you did, in the absence of parental figures. The only person that even came close to a caregiver, was Stefan.

Twelve year old Stefan, whose face was embellished with radiant forest green pearls and shaggy, dirty blonde hair that caressed his forehead. He too was in the absence of parental guidance and resorted to taking the burden upon himself.

The burden of raising six year old, Cielo. A pale skinned boy with a small button nose, deep mercury eyes, and equally as dark hair that was a black bordering blue.

Along with ten year old you. With short, blunt, H/C hair that had barely reached the lobes of your ears. The older boy had the idea of sustaining your short length due to the hassle that maintaining proper care for your soft tufts, came with for everyone involved, considering your living situation. Every month there was to be a day dedicated to Stefan, being the only one trusted, to wield his blade and put it to proper use on all three of you.

That is where your story began. In the abandoned building you used as a safeguard for as early as you could remember. Sat in an old and creepy wooden chair that Cielo had spotted on the outskirts, not too long before that day. A makeshift mirror was before you, consisting of jagged pieces of broken glass that Stefan had somehow assembled. How he always managed to scavenge a way to make things work in your favor was beyond you.

No matter the situation, Stefan had a solution. You wished to any unknown god, if there was one, that you in some way or shape or form had taken after him. That Cielo had seen you even in the slightest light, the same as you had gazed at Stefan.

"Why're you starin' at me, ya creep?" Came Stefan's silken but teasing voice. The corner of his lips was upturned to convey his failure in masking his amusement.

His question had effectively pulled you from your dream like stare. You wondered how he even knew of your unwavering eyes, for he hadn't given you a spare glance. "'M not staring at you, I was looking at the terrible job you're doing today." You had lied, obviously, all the while hastily shifting your head towards the ground in an effort to hide your embarrassment of being caught in the act of exactly what you had denied.

A loud hiss came from behind you, presumably emitted by the blonde, "I told ya not to move, idiot!" He exclaimed as he crouched on the ground and clutched his palm to his chest.

The millisecond his knees hit the cold ground, you were beside him in a panic, "Shit, I'm so sorry Stef! I swear, I didn't mean to! Do you need me to grab something to clean you off-" A muffled snort cut your hysteria short. You hadn't previously paid it heed but his body was shaking from the struggle to retain his quiet giggles.

He was fucking with you.

"I hate you." -you didn't mean that.

"You don't mean that," He stated as he lifted his head and allowed you to see how flushed his cheeks had grown from the strain he endured in order to fool you. "That should teach you to stay still while I have a knife in my hand."

"Whatever. Are ya done, or are you gonna take another two hundred years ruining my hair?"

He stood and mussed your head, causing your hair to grow more tortuous than it had already been from the way he had repeatedly combed his slender fingers through it during the chopping process. "Perfection takes time, and I think I'm as perfect as it gets when comin' to making you look like a little boy. But yes, I'm done." He satirized.

Mimicking his signature accent, you quipped, "Gee thanks, ya want me ta get Ciel' now or are ya gonna let the poor fella sleep in a while longer?" You pointed a small finger to the petite boy snoozing in the corner of the room. He was leaned against the wall with Stefan's jacket thrown over his form for comfort. Finding the abandoned building and being allowed to stay was a miracle in of itself, so you never fretted over not owning any sort of bed or bedding.

"Nah, if I don't wake him now he won't want to sleep through the night. Why don't cha' go and see if you can snag us some dinner? Anythin' will do for today, s'long we eat somethin'." He said, ignoring your attempt at mocking him in favor of gliding over to the boy in topic.

"Kay, I'll be back in a bit. I'll see if I can get us some bread this time!" You exclaimed, already having the door swung open.

"You be careful now. If your bum ain't back in twenty, I'll drag you back m'self." He warned as he referred to your habit of conjuring trouble with, anyone really. Well, more trouble than thieving already placed you in.

"Alright, promise I'll be careful." You reassured as you waltzed out into the street and shut the door.

You began your journey into the center of the city, not too far from home, pulling your brown hood over your head. Stefan had encountered the sweater somewhere, when he was on a previous supply run. It hung off your body too loosely then, but you had begun to fill it well.

From the minuscule amount of memories you had gathered at that point in your life, you concluded that Stefan and you had found each other when you were about Cielo's age; just a year younger and Stefan two years older.

He had lived with his dad before he was murdered by Military Police once they found him attempting to escape to the surface. Why the military police were roaming the city was unknown to you at the time, but they'd always seemed to show themselves when they were needed the least. Stefan's father never planned on taking him along, he planned on leaving his seven year old son to rot whilst he got to live out his fantasies. You couldn't recall Stefan ever speaking about it. The only words he would utter were 'good riddance', but you knew it affected him more than he led on. You'd caught him crying on some nights, and unfortunately there wasn't much you thought you could do. So you simply allowed him to hold you while you pretended you were still asleep.

Two years after you two had decided to stick together, three year old Cielo had quite literally ran into you both as you were on your way back home from gathering dinner. He was wailing hysterically and frantically pointed to the small building he had called home.

You had seen him in passing before, and while he always stuck close to his mother, he never failed to wave back at you two. When you arrived at his home, you had already guessed what you would find before you even opened the door. The air reeked of death, more than usual, and you wondered just how long little Cielo had endured living with a dead mother. It was a miracle he hadn't caught whatever it was that had stolen her life but that never mattered to the small boy. His sweet mother was gone and didn't seem to ever be returning.

He moved in that day and while he had always been the quiet type, after that incident he hadn't uttered a single word. You had longed for the day he would allow you to hear his soft voice again, and it pained both you and Stefan that he had to experience such trauma so young.

That wasn't to say he was all gloomy either. The boy would still be seen smiling and if you looked real close, at times you swore you could see a teasing grin on his face when he'd done something mischievous, like hiding Stefan's shoes.

They were all you knew. You had no memory of any parent or family. All you could recall was wandering alone until you had found Stefan. He had insisted you pick out your own name.

You formed your own found family. Stefan was the reliable oldest child, you were the curious one that had no qualms with starting or ending fights with the people that aimed to wrong you or the boys, and Cielo was the baby brother who stuck to you two like glue.

You were content... mostly. Theonly addition you could've thought to wish for was-

Sharp chirping had snapped you out of your stupor. Letting your ears guide your irises, you noticed a tiny winged friend had been trying to garner your attention.

Brows furrowing, you thought to yourself, 'What's a bird doing here in the underground?'

Squatting to the ground, you reached a hesitant hand out to the young animal. It didn't cower in fear, so in return, you didn't withdraw. You can still remember how velvety their feathers had felt on the pads of your fingers. Placing it onto your palm, you noticed it was missing a leg, the singular one twitching in your hand. Nothing seemed wrong with the wings so you had wondered why it didn't make use of them to flee.

You knew that if you had attained wings, you would have escaped your pit of hell and never looked back.

That was a lie. You'd do so, but only to procure a certain pair of boys.

"What's wrong, hun?" You spoke gently, "You don't seem afraid, so why don't I take you back with me? Show you to Ciel, I bet he'd like that." You grinned softly.

The bird made no objections, so you placed your new friend in the confines of your pocket, made sure they didn't suffocate and quickly continued your way to the center of the city where the stalls had stood. To any other person who had walked by, it looked as though you were simply taking a leisurely stroll. What they had failed to realize was that you had swiftly swiped a couple of stale loafs of bread, along with a few apples.

What you had failed to realize was that you had done that far too many times for the stall runners not to be familiar with your game of 'catch me if you can'.

"Don't try to be sneaky kid, I saw that! You better be planning on paying for those!" The man hollered.

You took that as your cue to book it before he could've begun to chase you.

Once you had arrived at your home and entered the building, you saw Cielo perched on the seat you had previously occupied. Stefan's jacket was still wrapped around his form, and his eyes were droopy as if he still hadn't fully awoken.

"Back so soon? Aw, did'ja miss me that bad?" Stefan had drawled from behind the ravenette.

"Stef, shut it for once and look!" You squealed as you bounded up to the two boys, hand retrieving the animal that rested in your sweater pocket.

"The hell is that?"

"A bird, you idiot. I found it on my way to get dinner!" Your statement had piqued Cielo's interest and caused him to hop off the chair to take a look into your hand.

Gesturing dubiously to the animal in your palm, Stefan conveyed his thoughts, "Y'know, when I said dinner... I meant somethin' we didn't have'ta cook, right?"

Eyeing the sharp weapon in his grasp that he had gestured with, you scolded, "Careful with that, Stefanie," you teased him with the nickname you knew he hated, "and don't be stupid, I brought bread and apples for dinner." You retorted.

"Ew, don't call me that, you nuisance."

"Look, Ciel. It's a baby bird. Tiny, just like you." You told the boy as you brought it to his eye level with one hand and booped his nose with the other.

Cielo's eyes had sparkled like a million different crystals as he took in the appearance of a bird. He had firstly admired the feathers and beak, hesitatingly reaching a small finger to its head, allowing it to slide down the slope as silk morphed into the bill. As they made contact, Cielo's eyes had begun to grow misty and his lower lip trembled.

Alarmed, you retracted the animal from his sight and begun to panic, "What's wrong, Ciel? Why're you crying? Did it hurt your finger? Let me see." You said and hastily grabbed his finger to inspect.

"Great, now ya made baby Ciel cry. Nice goin', N/N." Stefan scolded lightheartedly. It was quite obvious to him why Cielo had begun to cry but he could tell that you hadn't caught on just yet.

Turning to glance at the blonde, you defended yourself, "I-I didn't mean to, I swear it!" Focusing your attention back onto the boy before you, you offered, "I'll take the thing out if that's what you want, Ciel. I promise."

The child simply shook his head quickly and rapidly blinked in an attempt to dispel his tears. It didn't work. He reached for the bird and cradled it in his small hands, gazing at it with a fond smile as brand new tears dribbled down his chubby cheeks.

Stefan knelt beside him and placed a hand atop his shoulder, "I don't think those tears mean what ya think they do, N/N." he uttered.

"Hm? Why else would he be crying?" You inquired.

"My guess? They're happy tears." He explained, a soft smile peeking at the main attraction in the younger boys hands.

"Happy... tears?" You repeated, the words had felt foreign as they slipped off of your tongue.

"Mhm, now I wonder why such a free thing like this one would show up here of all places. 'S it hurt?" He asked and you shook your head in response. "Hm, weird. I reckon this lil' guy is yearnin' to go on home. Out onto the surface, that is." He stated as he stood back up.

Cielo's eyes had widened dramatically and he placed the bird gently back into your hold. Latching onto the taller boys sleeve, he had begun to hop frantically.

"Nuh-uh, I know what yer tryna say and the answer is and will always be, no. We're not goin' to the surface, baby Ciel." Stefan said sternly, his head only furthered his point as he shook it.

"The surface? You want to go to the surface, Ciel?" You'd beamed, heart accelerating at the mere thought. The boy bobbed his head enthusiastically as the twinkle in his eyes grew so intense, you almost shielded your own at the sight. His smile had been huge and scintillating.

You remembered that you had asked yourself, 'Is this what the people on the surface feel when they look at the sun?'

"Y'knowhow I feel about that, Y/N, don't ya dare encourage him." Stefan reminded and you knew immediately what he referred to.

It wasn't that Stefan hadn't dreamt of journeying to the land above, everyone down there did. The difference with Stefan, was that that dream was forever tainted by the mistakes of his father.

"You know, I heard about some people from the first underground city that escaped and got to the surface. Apparently they joined the military or something? Anyway, I bet they're enjoying the sun right now." You informed him softly, before you gently nudged your shoulder with his and continued, "Planting flowers?" You said pointedly, knowing the boys fascination with the blossoms.

In the scarce amount of books you were able to acquire, the way in which Stefan's eyes would linger and brighten when you read or admired pictures of anything floral, never escaped you. He was nowhere near an expert on chrysanthemums, dahlias or anything of the like but that didn't mean his enchantment was any less impassioned.

"Oh yeah? Good for them. Unfortunately, we aren't as lucky. As much fun as that sounds, it's way too risky. If the bird doesn't go back on its own, then I'm afraid it'll have to stay with us for the time bein'. "

Cielo's eyes grew with worry and he gestured to the animal still in your hands. "Ciel is right, it'll die down here, Stef!" You pleaded.

You had never actually believed that it would, it was simply an excuse to allow Stefan to spare another thought about venturing outside. You knew that, Cielo knew that, and Stefan knew that. Still, as weak as the excuse was, it was enough to force the boy to ponder.

"Even if we would, how would we even do such a thing?" He asked exasperatedly. As much as he had loathed the idea, that didn't mean he didn't want to step foot on the surface. He had wished for it more than anything. Dead father be damned, his heart yearned to take you both to see the sun set and the moon light the sky.

"The supply carts! They always come around midnight, and once they arrive, the guards switch shifts. Maybe we can find an opening and hitch a ride out of here!"

"That sounds way too easy. I'm sure the guards expect people to do exactly that, so I doubt they'd be so lenient. They probably double check the carts for stowaways." He explained as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Except, the guards that work the supply carts are the same ones that have run them for years. No one has escaped since I can remember, everyone has given up. Those guards are lazy and hate their jobs, I doubt they properly double check. But even if they did, we could bring something to cover ourselves with. It's a foul proof plan Stef, c'mon!"

It wasn't a foul proof plan. It was full of flaws and risks. Anyone with a right mind in their head could tell so. But you were a kid, so that fact was lost on you. And unfortunately for the three of you, Stefan was also a kid. No matter how wise the boy may have been, Stefan was twelve years old. A traumatized little boy with a grand amount of baggage on his shoulders and a curious heart in his chest. So the mere possibility of escaping his very own prison, blinded him of the fact that maybe it wasn't such a good idea, but instead, a life altering cataclysm.

Curiosity killed the cat.

The blanket of silence fell over you three, uncomfortably- for different reasons. It felt uncomfortable for you and Cielo because you could almost see the way Stefan's mind had gone haywire as he mulled over your proposition. It felt uncomfortable for Stefan, because now that the excuse of escaping had presented itself, he felt even more trapped than before. Restricted in his own body.

"...We're gonna need a big blanket."

That night was a rare one, where the citizens of the underground gathered and celebrated. What is it that they had celebrated? You never knew. In all honesty, the gathering was most likely a made up bash by your people, to give each other something to look forward to. You never minded, of course. Those nights were usually in such disorder that the three of you wound up taking from stalls that were left unattended or gambling on the outcome of random fights that would unravel. It was nights like those that you were blessed enough to witness humans in their intended nature. You gazed at more smiles than any other nights combined.

Contradictorily, that night, you used the commotion as a distraction to board the carts that went up and down the entrance of the city. Stefan had miraculously acquired a blanket that was made up of stitched together cloths, to be used as a cover. The carts had arrived at midnight, as usual, and took a couple of hours to unload. It was almost daybreak which meant that the carts were to soon take off.

Stefan and Cielo were given the task of watching your six as you proceeded with your mission of initiating a distraction. In addition to the cover, Stefan had also gotten his hands on a sweater that he designated to Cielo. It had oversized pocket holes with the intention of allowing your bird to stay hidden within the journey.

After you detected Stefan's signal, informing you that the carts were good to go, you took action.

The center of the city was fully crowded with people idly standing and chatting, sitting and eating and others aimlessly exploring. You had waltzed up to a stall cluttered with buyers, inconspicuously slipping through the groups. As you drew closer, your nose gradually caught an indescribable and inescapable essence that it had never before encountered. There were so many things unknown to you during that stage of your life, countless questions unanswered, but the second you caught a whiff of that stubborn scent, it was the only thing your mind knew.

You were sure it was something that could've only been sold on nights like those and even then, most citizens wouldn't have been able to afford the enigma. The shorter the distance between your body and the stall supplying your hyper-fixation, the stronger it gripped your lungs. It engulfed you, suffocated you in a way you found that you didn't mind.

Addicting.

You stuck close to the man in front of you who was leisurely strolling by. In one swift motion, you swiped two bottles of the sweet nectar you became enamored with and gently placed one inside of the man's pocket, doing the same to the other one for yourself. Then, came the easy part.

Drawing in a large breath of air, you yelled at the top of your lungs, "Ooh, he's stealing! He's selling the sweet stuff this guy is selling!"

Simultaneously, gasps erupted from within the crowds and the man in charge of the stall had begun to berate the man that was accused. Standing his ground, the man didn't simply take the insults and begun to defend his honor.

It didn't take long for a brawl to break through with random people who weren't even involved, joining. You would've loved to stay and watch till the end but that was the exact opposite of your goal.

Fleeing in the direction of your escape route, a decent amount of men in Military Police uniforms had slipped by you in an effort to quell the commotion. You thanked your past self, of five minutes, for choosing a particularly sturdy man that could defend himself or else you would've felt poor for him.

You caught up to Stefan who held Cielo in his arms and began to sprint as fast as your short legs could take you. "Do you think that'll be enough?" You asked through a series of pants.

"Let's hope so." Stefan replied, equally as breathless.

The carts were near the entrance of the city so it was inevitable that the path towards it was slightly steep. Just as you had hoped, most of the guards had fled to aid in yielding the tussle that had enacted further into the settlement.

Without a word, Stefan aided Cielo in climbing into one of the front carts and then quickly hopped in after, cradling the boy to his chest. You joined them both, lifting one leg after the other but as you did so, your foot had gotten caught in one of the handles, creating a loud bang.

The sound was not monstrous enough that the citizens within the plaza would pay any heed but enough that if there were any guards near, the noise would not be disregard-able.

Unfortunately for you, there were.

The look Stefan had given you demanded of you to keep moving and get in.

Regardless of your anxiety sky rocketing, you leapt inside and placed yourself between one of the walls of the cart and Cielo. All of the carts had a slidable door, so with trembling hands, you slowly shut the top, enclosing the three of you into the tight space. Stefan had placed the blanket over your trio and clutched the sleeve of your sweater subconsciously. He was nervous, rightfully so, and so were you and Cielo.

Your slip up that had occurred just a couple of seconds before, had caused two of the soldiers that were set to keep guard to trek back towards the entrance to confirm that there were no problems. You heard each of their footsteps as they investigated but in the end, it had yielded nothing.

That was until the small bird in Cielo's pocket had begun to chirp, ear-piercing squeaks.

"The fuck is wrong with her?" Stefan had whispered harshly. You were surrounded by darkness so you never knew who exactly he was looking at, but you knew he was genuinely asking, the stress was what had brought the edge to his voice.

"I don't know. Cielo isn't smushing her or anything, she might be afraid of the dark?" You answered, and since none of you had any idea of what to do next, you simply awaited the moment she would settle.

A man, who you assumed was a guard, had slurred, "What's with the noise? 'S that a bird?" You could tell he had most likely helped himself to the cheap alcohol on the streets, the inebriation had been clear within his voice.

"I don't know, let me double check inside the carts and make sure we didn't trap one. Don't know what it'd be doing all the way down here though." Said another man, that one definitely had not slurred.

You heard the lids of other carts being slid open, one by one, and had begun to panic. Your heart beat could be heard pounding through your ears and though it was most probable just your imagination, you swore you heard two more rhythms beating in sync.

"Shit. They're gonna find us, we're so dead." You whispered to no one in particular.

"Let's just keep quiet and stay put. She's quieting down now, so hopefully he'll leave-" Stefan began, but came to a screeching halt when your cart lid began to part.

Light had entered through the sheet over you and allowed you to view the panicked expressions engraved into both of the boys before you. Cielo's mercury eyes were misted over and Stefan's emeralds were as wide as saucers. His hand was clutched into the pocket that you knew he had kept his blade in, and you begged with your own eyes to wait. Not yet. You still held onto hope that the man would overlook you and carry on.

But then the sheet draped atop your forms was slowly peeled away and you were met with a man that sported a dark head of hair, styled in an almost mullet and paired with an aspiring mustache and goatee. Your breath halted as your eyes met his, as if that would make you invisible.

He had slid his dark eyes to Stefan next, the boy only gradually slid his hand to clutch you protectively, effectively squishing the younger boy between you two, in the process.

His charcoal irises met Cielo next and you had seen them soften the slightest bit for the boy. He had his back to Stefan and was squeezing you for dear life. Dusky eyes glazed with fear, bottom lip quivering and the tiny bird one of his hands as he cradled it to his chest. His mouth ceaselessly shaping the word 'please' onto his lips.

The atmosphere was static for about ten seconds, each one torturous. Tendrils of fear creeped into your lungs, effectively cropping your quickened breaths that threatened to escape your throat as you awaited the fated reaction from the man who held a long gun in his right hand.

"Did'ya find it?" Slurred the other soldier once more. He seemed father in distance than the one you had a staring contest with. The soldier hesitated, mouth gaping and shutting repeatedly.

"...Yeah. It's just a bird, I'll dispose of it once we get back up." He announced and slid the top closed once again.

Not a single soul moved a muscle for a long minute after that and you were unsure if it was in disbelief or simply because you were all still scared shitless.

"...what the hell..." Stefan found the strength to whisper, his blonde hair mending with his forehead as it clung with the perspiration that had been caused by his nerves.

"He didn't snitch..." You whispered in astonishment.

"He didn't... we are some lucky sons of bitches, N/N. I hope you know that. Someone from beyond is lookin' out for us."

"Don't get your hopes up, we're not out of the forest yet. H-he might want to deal with us once we get to the surface. Let's just wait it out for now." You suggested, tremble clear within your voice.

"Right." He agreed, before you heard the shuffling of clothes and he continued, "You alright, baby Cielo?" He whispered softly to the child in his arms. You felt him nod his head lightly before burying it further into your chest.

The cart jerked suddenly before it began to move and up they proceeded, one by one. The organ nestled into your chest felt as though it had been replaced with a jackhammer.

"Oh my gosh, Stef- I'm so nervous." You informed him as you squeezed your eyes shut.

"I know, don't worry-"

"This is actually happening, what if he kills us-"

"I won't let him-"

"If he does end up putting a bullet in our heads, I want you to know that I love you."

"I- er. Well, really? I love you too-"

"You and Cielo are my family, I love you both more than anything-"

"We know, love.-"

"I'm a snide piece of shit sometimes, but I'm so sorry that I convinced you to do this-"

"No, you never-"

"I mean if you think about it, if I never found the bird that day, Cielo wouldn't have had the thought of escaping in his mind-"

Your adamant rambling had gotten caught in your throat as you felt your fingers being interlaced. Warm digits carded themselves through the gaps between your own, a gentle squeeze being pressed into your palm. In milliseconds, your mind was quelled and a soft exhale escaped your lips.

"I'm sorry." Your voice was barely audible.

"You have nothin' to be sorry bout." He reassured you as gently as he could. There was no hesitance or shake in his statement, he genuinely believed that fact.

"If we do die, I'm glad that the last thing I'll see, will probably be your faces." Although you were enveloped in darkness, you still allowed yourself to gift a soft smile in the vague direction of both boys.

"You ain't gonna die, you sappy girl, I won't let him harm you both. I promise, no bullets will be goin' into either of your heads."

"You can't promise that."

"I just did."

Stefan had a knack for leaving you speechless. "...thank you."

That sentiment was heavily reciprocated. "...shut up."

The entire ride took a whole ten minutes to complete, and since you had infiltrated a cart towards the front, it was one of the first to arrive.

Footsteps approaching rapidly reached your ears and then the cart lid was swung open. The blanket that shielded you from the world was thrown off of you and your eyes took their time to adjust to the altered lighting, but soon enough, you saw him. The same soldier from before, donning the tan jacket with the green stallion emblem plastered on his left chest pocket. The only difference was that he had his gun aimed directly at your trio.

His expression was intense and his body seemed rigid as he ordered, "Get out now. Run and don't look back. Get to a nearby city or village and don't tell anyone where you're from just yet. Wait a couple years to do so and never come back again." His brows met in the middle of his face as he further took in your appearances. "You guys are so small... what the hell? Where are your parents?!" He inquired.

"W-we're orphans." Stefan informed him and it surprised you that he had stuttered. It was then that you noticed he had already sat up and spread his arms to block both you and Cielo from the guns barrel.

"...go. You never met me, got it?"

"Yes, sir." You both replied in unison.

Stefan was the first to spring into action, hopping out of the cart and hoisting Cielo to his side promptly after. You wasted no time to follow and landed on the earth with a thud. Stefan didn't hesitate to take the soldier's advice, taking your hand in his left and Cielo in his right arm before breaking into a sprint in the first direction he turned to.

Your head had begun to pound, probably from the sun that had risen in the sky by then, and your lungs in-took as much oxygen as they could handle. Imagine your surprise when the air around you didn't taste stale and humid but instead as if you were drinking freshly fetched water. As you were running, the scenery encircling your form began to decelerate. Your eyes absorbed every defining detail that they could hold.

The glistening green grass, the scorching rays of sunlight that drew its claws into your skin, the prodigious trees in the distance. They seemed almost unnatural to you, with flowers blooming in between every leaf that protruded from within the ragged intwined branches.

Those leaves, they reminded you of Stefan's eyes.

The air felt significantly fuller out in the surface, it filled your nostrils and you found that there existed no scenario in which you could get enough. Your lips parted in your heaving and whether that was in result of your physical strain or your enchantment with the ventilation didn't matter. You felt as though you had taken your first sip of water in the midst of a drought.

You vision began to turn blurry. A side effect from the difference in environment, perhaps? No. Your eyes were wet with the tears dribbling down your face before you could even register their presence. But you weren't sad- no, anything but that. Those tears had felt amazing, as if they held the key that liberated your soul.

'So, these are happy tears?'

You craved for more.

And then a flash of blue entered your peripheral. It was different from the one that had painted the canvas above you.

Sapphire blue wings, but they were not alike the small bird that was cradled into Cielo's chest. Those wings lacked feathers and looked smooth to the touch. It crossed your mind that it had to be an insect, being that it was smaller than any bird you had read about. It swayed with the wind and was what you could only describe as beautiful with the beauty that left its mark on the mind of every and any being that had the blessing of gazing upon it.

It soared and it fluttered, and you found yourself wishing to be even the slightest bit as ethereal and unrestricted as that small being had been.

"Wow... so this is the surface..." You uttered in the most lightest voice that Stefan had ever heard.

He directed his head towards you, hand still grasping your own, with the intention of stealing a quick glance. He really should've known better. It was never only a quick glance when it came to you. Inevitably, he found himself with the compulsion of the inability to detach his irises from your delicate face.

That smile was the most irradiant and prodigious he had ever seen dance across your lips. You were crying, but he knew it was not a matter of pain. How could it be, when your eyes whispered a completely different synopsis?

You were gazing through the expanse field and his heart hurled him through a flurry of individual emotions in a matter of seconds.

Bliss, excitement, contentment and love.

He adored your expression so much so, it forced him to have sought out what it was that had driven you to that high you were riding. And then he saw it too, every detail sunk into his hippocampus just as they did in yours. The glistening green grass, the scorching rays of sunlight that drew its claws into his skin, and the almost unnatural prodigious trees in the distance with flowers blooming in between every leaf that protruded from within the ragged intwined branches. And the butterfly.

'Oh, that butterfly.' His voice cooed within the confines of his own mind.

It was the second most beautiful thing he had laid his eyes upon, and seeing it so carefree and selfish allowed himself to picture his youngest self finally breaking the bars that made up the cage he enclosed himself in, deep in the pits of his soul. He too found his eyesight becoming blurry.

Those mesmerizing green eyes grew glassy, reflecting his most favorite scenery.

He directed his attention towards the boy in his arms, there sat the first most beautiful sight the world had offered him. Cielo's smile.

Cielo's gigantic grin that enveloped his face, only being rivaled by your own. Both of those expressions he had appointed as the most paradisical he had ever seen, and he had gazed upon them one after the other in a span of seconds.

Then you both had stared at Cielo. Baby Cielo's face that radiated bliss. His dark hair had gotten messier by the second with the wind carding its delicate fingers through his fluffy locks, caressing every crevice of his face, every nook and cranny. The sunshine bouncing off of his pale skin and making it seem as if he was glowing. His once deep mercury eyes almost mimicking a navy blue, and you wondered if they had always been that color.

The small boy shifted those eyes to the even smaller bird that laid in his hands, lifting it into the air ever so slightly. The animal immediately responded with rapidly flapping its wings, an action that startled the boy, but had not thwarted his advance at lifting it up even higher, encouraging the bird to take off into the vast empyrean sky. And it did, effectively causing boyish giggles to erupt from within Cielo's lips as he had found his new favorite color.

And oh, he couldn't believe his eyes. There were clouds, so many of them. They looked so soft that he found himself wanting to touch them, lay in them, and wrap himself in the fluffy substance. His arms outstretched and he felt as though he had been so near; just a hop away and they'd meet his stubby fingers.

Stefan leaped, to Cielo's surprise. He wondered to himself if the older boy had mind powers or anything of the sort.

Nevertheless, his fingers never met the clouds but he couldn't care less. Not when he was so blissful. Not when both the people he adored most in the world were just an arms length away and had worn those enchanting expressions. And they were laughing, hypnotic sounds that he fell in love with because it was the very first time they had ever laughed like that. As he always had and always would, he followed their lead and joined in the giggle fit.

It'd been a beautiful seen really, full with contentment and carelessness.

You had run for about twenty minutes straight by the time Stefan had informed you about a settlement nearby that a friend from the underground had told him about. He told you it had not been too far from where you where at, so a short break would be fine. He placed Cielo gently onto the ground while you both caught your breaths. Your calf muscles burned and ached but for some reason, you didn't dislike that feeling paired with the blaze in your lungs. Running was fun to you. No one had spoken yet and the only sound that was heard was the in sync heaves both you and Stefan dealt.

Until Cielo burst into another hackle of giggles and began to race through the grassy field you stood upon. His little legs had taken him in a such a rush, you had begun to worry because it almost seemed as if-

...he fell face first onto the ground.

"Cielo!" Came both of your voices in unison.

But instead of the wailing you had expected, his cries of joy grew louder as he flipped onto his back and began to roll around on the grass.

Hesitantly you asked, "Cielo... what are you doing, love?" But he paid no heed and continued to cackle like a madman. Or boy. That was the closest you had gotten to hearing his actual voice, so you complained no further.

The boy then abruptly sat up and brushed his palms against the dewy blades of grass with a satisfied expression that spoke words worth a millennia. Dragging his gaze up towards his favorite people, he patted the empty spots beside him, encouraging you both to take them. Of course, you obliged without a second thought.

As you took the seat to his right and Stefan to his left, you mimicked Cielo's earlier actions and glided your small hands over the velvety blades. A thud came from next to you, emitted by Cielo throwing the rest of his body back onto the grass. It was only then that you realized what he wanted.

Something so simple yet so Cielo of him to want to do. He just wished to enjoy the moment with you. And so you too plopped yourself into the grass next to him, Stefan followed after. Twisting your neck to face both boys, you found something obstructing your view. It was dainty and dewy, much like the green blades encircling it, with purple petals that glistened and swayed with the breeze.

A flower.

It was only then that you noticed the abundance of them on the field you laid on. Each one a vibrant periwinkle shade. The sight caused you to flip onto your tummy and lay your head to rest on one of your arms, the other had reached out to caress the silky petals.

Unbeknownst to you, Stefan watched on with the most softest expression one could give another. One exuding adoration and love. He then quietly scanned the grass around him and plucked the first stray flower he found, taking a couple of seconds for himself to gaze at it admirably.

In one slow motion, he reached over Cielo's body and tucked away the short strands of hair behind your ears, any that were long enough at the time. Then, he gently placed the delicate flower right along with them, sitting back and admiring his work when the deed had been done.

The loving gesture wasn't lost on you and your eyes had quickly found themselves attempting to catch a glimpse at the fragile plant nestled behind your ear. After you realized that you wouldn't be able to, you opted to instead move your eyes to the older boy that was now within your range of vision. Green and purple would compliment each other beautifully, wouldn't they?

Plucking your own violet treasure from the ground beneath you, before you gifted it to the boy, you decided to place a sweet kiss atop the corolla. Since you had both sat up at the point, the nimble flowers journey to its rightful place behind his ear used little to no effort.

As you sat back and admired each others work, it was as though the sole reason they had sprouted was for that exact moment. Minds working in sync, you both looked to the boy between you who gazed back with a fond smile. In unison, you searched for another pair of blossoms before placing kisses atop the supple petals and tucking them both behind the younger boys' ears. Yours on the right and Stefan's on his left.

Once they had both been placed in their rightful places, you both drew back and glanced at Cielo's expression, surprisingly finding the fat of cheeks painted a baby pink.

Slowly, as your mind digested that fact, your felt your own warmth spread across the bridge of your nose, only stopping short of your ears.

As if having a domino effect, Stefan's skin followed directly after your own.

And so, you sat with warm cheeks and flowers behind your ears with the only two boys you had ever known, feeling as though you were the only three people who ever existed, heart feeling full at the thought.

But of course, gaining a taste of freedom always seemed to make one drunk with pleasure therefore craving for as much as they could get their greedy hands on. Give an addict an inch and they'll yearn for a mile.

So as the sun had set and you threw yourself back onto the ground after an intense game of tag, with your chests heaving and the flowers you took such care to place having long since fallen back onto the earth where they came from, the conversation that would soon become your core drive throughout your pre-teen and teenage years, began.

"What kind of flowers are these?" You asked, one hand twirling a stem in between your index and thumb and the other placed as a cushion behind your head.

Stefan had taken his time to answer and that alone was your first sign that something else had been roaming around his mind. "I'll tell ya, if you promise me somethin'." He responded, eyes piercing the sky.

"What is it?" You inquired, interest being piqued.

With a dreamy sigh, he announced the thought that had plagued his mind, "Promise that one day, we'll see what's beyond the walls."

The idea had baffled you at the time, since it had never once crossed your mind of going beyond the barriers that separated you from what was unknown. "What? Why would you wanna go beyond the walls?" You asked incredulously.

"Why wouldn't-cha? If we ever get the chance to, I wanna see what lays beyond them and then after that, I wanna see what lays beyond that and then what lays beyond even that."

Exhaling in your surprise, you continued, "You mean the titans? I know we've never seen one, but that doesn't mean they suddenly stopped existing. Did you forget why the walls are even there?" It was a genuine question as your mind couldn't even begin to comprehend asking for more than what you had then.

Stefan had always been a dreamer through and through. "Well o'course I haven't forgotten and I'm sure those titans are scary as hell. But, let's pretend they weren't there, wouldn't ya wanna see what the world you were born into has to offer? Yer birthright? Like, all of it? There just has to be more out there that we haven't even begun to imagine, what if this is just the beginnin'?"

"Well yeah, but I don't know. I don't really like change and I feel like that would change a lot." You responded hesitantly.

"We're experiencing change right now and you seem to be doin' just fine." He challenged.

"That's cause you're here."

Covering his face at the flush that ensued because of your statement, he chuckled, "And I'll be right there if and when that happens, both of us will." He gestured to himself and the young boy in between you two. "Nothin' could ever split us up. We'll be the wonder trio till the end." He assured.

Humming in thought, you answered, "...I guess that wouldn't be too bad then. I wonder what's out there." Your mind had begun to race with ideas, most of which consisted of greenery and the jewels you had seen in old tattered books. "Other than titans, of course."

"Guess we'll have to find out. So, promise?" He extended his pinky towards the both of you, knowing that although Cielo still hadn't uttered a word, he wouldn't hesitate to be included.

"You haven't even told me the name of the flower, Stef. I ain't stupid." You reminded lightheartedly.

He seemed to have genuinely forgotten the exchange you agreed upon, so you didn't fret too much, "Oh, right." He uttered before he tilted his head to glance at the flowers scattered around you. "Those are bellflowers. Though their scientific name is campanulas and they signify gratitude, humility, attractiveness, and everlasting love."

They also represent disappointment and foreshadowing events, though till this day, you didn't know if Stefan had known that fact and withheld that information from you or if he truly was clueless. And if he did know, why had he kept it from you?

Giggling like the naïve child you were, you interlocked both of your fingers and awaited the third to join. "Thanks Stef, I promise."

Instead of raising his pinky finger, Cielo had decided to grant you both what you had been secretly imploring for years. "I promise." Came the smallest voice ever spoken, followed by an even tinier digit placed between your own.

Your heart skipped a beat and you halted your breath as your body entered a temporary state of torpor. A moment of silence had followed and Cielo allowed it because he knew he needed to let the action sink into your brains. He allowed his voice to marinate.

"C-cielo! You- you used your voice!" You exclaimed, finally finding your own as you sprung your torso up from within the grass and gaped at the boy below you.

In response, he simply but smugly, nodded his head.

Stefan had sat up too but instead of voicing his excitement, his wide eyes stared at him in astonishment. You would think Cielo had invented time travel with the look Stefan had given him.

"Say my name next! Come on say it!" You demanded with avidity, hands clutched together as you leaned into the young boy.

He didn't budge, opting to smile complacently, both hands now behind his head for comfort.

Breaking out of his stupor, Stefan joined in the exchange with a smirk, "Ya can't just drop that on us and expect us not to nag' ya. Come on now Ciel, say our names."

He shook his head again and forced you to resign in your attempts. It had seemed Cielo wanted to take baby steps, and that was fine with you.

"Fine, but we'll get it out of you soon. Don't expect us to let it go anytime soon. That lovely voice of yours deserves to be heard, at the very least by us." You told him with a smile, punctuating your statement with a boop to his nose.

"Mmm, yer just bein sassy with us right now, aren'tcha? Fine then, once you move out of that stage yer in, you won't wanna stop flappin' those gums to me." Even though Stefan had said it tauntingly, you didn't miss the tone in his voice that indicated how wishful of that he was. Nevertheless, he laid himself back onto the ground and began to admire the sunset, one of his lifelong dreams.

As the sun set and you watched the moon light the sky, the three of you were yet again mesmerized by the sight of what looked to be a million lanterns endlessly flickering. Even though you knew it impossible, that didn't hinder your attempt at counting every single ball of light that you saw in the canvas of navy blue. Navy blue that mirrored both Cielo's eyes and hair. Whilst pointing at certain clumps that reminded you of shapes, you soon fell into a deep slumber, still on the ground because back pain be damned, sleeping under the stars was just too good of an opportunity to pass up. Stefan had reassured you that village you planned on using as a safeguard would still be there the following day.

That night, in the form of a dream, you were shown what you assumed to be memories. To whom those memories belonged to, you weren't given a clue. All you knew was that you pitied the owner, for even the mere fraction of seconds that were bestowed upon you from which you lived through their eyes was much too heavy for your still fragile heart. Each and every snippet of the vague scenes that flashed before your eyes brought upon their very own powerful emotions. Each leaving you inundated, as if all the air had been stripped from your lungs.

A loose limb lied in a puddle of blood, dirt and cobblestone beneath it. Your cheeks had been soaked and throat sore, fingernails scratched at the ground as dirt collected underneath them and warm blood muddied on your fingertips.

The scent of a boy with disheveled light brown shaggy hair, as you rode atop a horse. Those same fingertips, now calloused, clutching the fabric he donned with a strength you'd never felt before. His welcoming aroma created a safe haven that flooded a sense of security into your chest. Despite the storm that brewed in your heart, caused by another reason unknown to you at the time, it allowed you to wrap yourself in a brief feeling of peace. That was a person with a heavy meaning in the owner's life.

Round and misty hazel eyes that seemingly reflected the world in them. Grief and despair showed themselves in wisps within their depths. The sight alone had caused your heart to sink and lip to quiver.

The one after was the most vivid, for it felt as though you could control your own movements. A sunset had doused the sky in a multitude of colors that ranged from blue, orange, red and gold; if you squinted well enough, you could see a splash of purple. Directly in front of you was what seemed to be a river, your socks discarded to the side and toes wet. There was a warm body sitting alongside you, mimicking your pose. Your cheeks had felt warm once again and you didn't know if the cause was the sun bath you experienced or something else entirely. All you knew was that you had felt prickles of bliss and tranquility within your own body, that was enough for you to yearn for just a moment longer within that headspace.

Then, soft pink lips invaded your mind in a fog. The faint taste of something sweet that you couldn't even begin to describe. Not when you were focused on steadying the rapid thumping within your chest. That had brought upon feelings that your mind couldn't even fathom existed.

A dainty white blossom that stood tall and healthy the first moment, only to appear broken and crumpled the next; cradled in one's palm. Your eyes had gotten glassier with each passing second as lachrymose had been thrusted upon you in that instant.

A gentle but strong woman with vibrant gold locks and crystal blue eyes that outshone even the jewels embedded within the crown placed atop her head. Pride is what your mind had whispered in your ears, only getting louder the longer you had stared at her. And then suddenly you were placed in front of an injured and dying man with tanned skin and mud colored hair that bordered black. His fingers were interlocked with yours as he mouthed something that you couldn't yet register. His eyes turned dull and his head lulled back against a tree.

A large body of cerulean water in your peripheral from what you could tell and there was a male in front of you, his face distorted in your vision. One of his legs had been missing but that didn't stop him from dipping the toes he had left into the depths of something unknown to you. That person had a serene aura to them, that much you could tell, and there was a lingering thought of accomplishment in your core.

A girl with a brown head of hair that teared apart a type of meat, one that you couldn't yet recognize, with her teeth. Tears cascaded down her cheeks in streams, but you recognized the look on her face. She wasn't experiencing heartache or anguish, instead, she was in pure bliss. And then in a flash, she laid on the ground in a different setting. Crimson pooled around her form and a pain you couldn't even begin to elucidate swallowed you whole.

The next few scenes only lasted split seconds.

A young boy around your age with dirty blonde hair and light forest green pearls that matched those of your Stefan.

An unusually round and fluffy plant that almost seemed, hairy?

A flat pastry that had been folded and drizzled with a dark substance.

More violet flowers, only that time, they were doused in alizarin crimson.

A boy with sleek dark hair that reached to about his chin and jade colored eyes that stared expectantly, a pleading declaration swam in the black pools of his pupils.

Sharp ivory claws.

Bones, colossal in size.

So much steam.

Wings?

And throughout each memory, almost acting as a shadow in the back of your mind, there had been a reoccurring sight.

A pair of honey golden eyes.

Each time they presented themselves in front of you, they projected a vast collection of emotions that ranged from ecstasy and pleasure to misery and regret and everything in between. There was so much pain, emotional and physical, within those short but constant moments.

Luckily for you, just as soon as they had been tossed into your arms, they were tugged away as though you had not been meant to remember such moments. And so that is exactly what happened. You were allowed to slip back into your momentary state of peace.

Looking back at it, you should've known. Should've known that it was all too good to be true, because of course life could not allow you to stay in your idyllic place in life, beside both Stefan and Cielo, no matter how tightly you cradled it with your very own hands. Because one second, it felt as though you were coddling the sapphire blue butterfly you had fallen in love with and the very next, that same insect disintegrated into ashes and slipped though your fingers. No matter how hard you tried or how long you spent scouring the flakes from the ground, you'd never be able to seize every piece that fell to the floor. And most definitely not without bruising your knees from the effort that got rewarded with nothingness.

Fun fact: Cielo did indeed see you in the same light as you had seen Stefan. He also did think you were as, if not more, ethereal as that butterfly.

#honey soaked promises #anime #coveholdenmyluv #fanfic #attack on titan #eren jaeger #eren yeager #mikasa ackerman #aot #armin arlert #connie springer #trepidation #hsp trepidation #hsp chapter one #hsp #stefan #stefan hsp #cielo #cielo hsp #eren yeager x reader #reiner braun x reader #reiner x reader #aot reiner #mikasa aot #aot x reader canon verse

[theprayerfulword]

November 29

Psalm 19:14 Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in Thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.

Isaiah 57:15 For this is what the high and exalted One says — He who lives forever, whose name is holy: “I live in a high and holy place, but also with the one who is contrite and lowly in spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly and to revive the heart of the contrite.”

Psalm 68:19 Blessed be the Lord, who daily bears our burden, the God who is our salvation. Selah.

John 3:17 For God sent not His Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through Him might be saved.

Hebrews 10:35-36 Therefore do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. 36 For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise:

1 Thessalonians 1:3 …constantly bearing in mind your work of faith and labor of love and steadfastness of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.

May you grasp that although the tides of power will shift among the factions of men, against integrity and diligence there are no laws, only the resistance of evil hearts and wicked minds. Daniel 6

May the worst that can be said of you by your enemies is that you are dedicated to the ways of God. Daniel 6

May God, Whom you serve continually, rescue you. Daniel 6

May you trust God, even in your direst circumstances, that when you are lifted out and delivered from them, no wound will be found on you, to the praise, glory and honor of God. Daniel 6

May you fear and reverence the Lord, for He is the living God Who endures forever and Whose kingdom will not be destroyed for His dominion will never end; He rescues and saves, performing signs and wonders in the heavens and on the earth, rescuing His beloved from the power of evil. Daniel 6

May you engage in wholesome thinking by recalling the words spoken by the holy prophets and commands given by our Lord and Savior through apostles. 2 Peter 3

May you ever remember and accept by faith that just as long ago, by God's word, the heavens existed and the earth was formed out of water and by water, yet by these waters also the world of that time was deluged and destroyed; by that same word the present heavens and earth are reserved for fire, being kept for the day of judgment and destruction of ungodly men. 2 Peter 3

May you always remember this: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years and a thousand years are like a day, so the Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness, but He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish but everyone to come to repentance. 2 Peter 3

May you understand the type of life you should live, since the day of Lord shall come as a thief, bringing destruction and renewal, that by living holy and godly lives as you look forward to it, you can speed its coming and enter into the home of righteousness with a new heaven and earth. 2 Peter 3

May you make every effort to be found spotless, blameless, and at peace with God, bearing in mind that the Lord's patience means salvation. 2 Peter 3

May you be on your guard that the errors and deception of lawless, unprincipled people do not distract you from your own steadfastness and cause you to fall from your own stability, but rather look fully toward God and grow in the grace & knowledge of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 3

Do not fear want or need, My dear one, nor feel shame at lack or shortage. It is not a measure of your worth, nor is it an indicator of My power. These are tools of My training and the methods of your assignments, My child. I walk beside you through the process, My love, always with you, never forsaking you; when you have My presence, My comforting Spirit, you have all riches and treasure you need in abundance – you simply have to accept it by turning to Me and embracing Me. The farmer toils hard in the field, the stockman spends days and nights with the flock and herd away from the comforts of his house, the business man travels far without the company of those he loves, the warrior endures privation and hardship in his assignment – each one fulfilling his appointed task in obedience to his calling, never feeling shame in the midst of his work, simply looking forward to the time when the task is complete. Go forth in your work, My trusted one, in the circumstances you are given, drawing from Me all you need, walking in constant fellowship with Me so that I can guide you step by step, word by word, deed by deed, establishing the Father's will and the kingdom of God in earth.

May you penitently keep hearing, receiving, loving and obeying God's statutes, for His testimonies are wonderful, far exceeding anything conceived by man. Psalm 119

May you receive the light which the entrance and unfolding of God's word brings, for it gives understanding, discernment and comprehension to the simple. Psalm 119

May you long deeply for God's commandments, so that you open your mouth and pant with eager desire. Psalm 119

May you love the name of the Lord, for it is His way to always turn to and look with mercy and favor upon those who do. Psalm 119

May your desire and heart-felt longing be to have God establish your steps and direct them by means of His word, guarding against any iniquity or sin having dominion or rule over you. Psalm 119

May your petition to God be for Him to ransom you from the injustice and violence of evil people so that you can keep His precepts and follow His guiding principles. Psalm 119

May you humbly seek to serve God that His face would shine with pleasure upon you, and He would teach you His statutes and decrees. Psalm 119

May your heart break with the sorrow of God's heart, streaming tears from your eyes, because men do not keep God's law, not hearing it, nor receiving it, neither loving or obeying it. Psalm 119

May you recognize that the Lord is rigidly righteous and His judgments, and all expressions of His will, are upright. Psalm 119

May you acknowledge that the statutes He has commanded and laid down are righteous and the testimonies He has appointed in great faithfulness are fully trustworthy. Psalm 119

May you realize that your passion will consume you and your enthusiasm will wear you out because your enemies ignore His words and your adversaries have forgotten them. Psalm 119

May you love the word of God, which is very pure, having been tried and well-refined, and the promises of God, which have been thoroughly tested by His servants. Psalm 119

May you never forget God's precepts, though at times you feel small, insignificant, lowly and despised. Psalm 119

May you rejoice that God's righteousness is everlasting and His law is truth. Psalm 119

May you continually find delight in God's commands, even when trouble, distress, and anguish have found you, come upon you, and taken hold of you. Psalm 119

May you seek God for understanding so that you will live, and pray for discernment and comprehension so that you will not die, for His righteous testimonies are everlasting, His decrees are binding to eternity, and His statutes are forever right. Psalm 119

May you call to the Lord with all your heart, crying out with your whole being for Him to hear and answer you, for then you will be able to hear and obey His decrees, receiving and loving His statutes. Psalm 119

May you cry out to God to save you so that you will be able to keep His testimonies. Psalm 119

May you rise before the dawning of the morning and cry in child-like prayer for help, for you have put your hope in His word, trusting Him alone. Psalm 119

May you look forward to the night watches and arise even before the appointed time, as your eyes open with eagerness to meditate on the promises in God's word. Psalm 119

As you cry out to the Lord, may your voice be heard in accordance with His steadfast love, that His Spirit may quicken you with the power of the resurrection and give you life, according to His righteous decree. Psalm 119

May you be cognizant of how near those who devise wicked schemes are, and how close those who follow after wrong thinking draw, but may you also understand just how far they all are from God's law and His deliverance, and how much nearer to you the Lord is than all your foes, for His word is true. Psalm 119

May you rest in the long-ago learned, well-practiced, and thoroughly established conviction which you have known from of old, that the Lord has founded His testimonies and established His statutes to last forever. Psalm 119

May you not be envious or covetous for the things God has not yet given, but submit your soul in humble acceptance to the lot He has assigned you and rejoice that He is your inheritance, your sufficiency, and the earnest of all that is to come, that you may walk day by day with an open hand to all those He points out to you, for though silver and gold may not be available, the riches and power in the Name of Jesus can be freely given to all. Proverbs 28:22, Acts 3

#blessings #daily #prayers #scripture

[curtiscroachblog]

Keep your hope alive (1)

Word for Today written by Bob and Debby Gass

Saturday 11th November 2023

'Take hold of the hope that is right in front of us.' Hebrews 6:18 CEV

Emilie Batisse was 79 when she was injured in a hit-and-run accident and wasn't expected to live. When Norman Vincent Peale went to visit her, he noticed a row of brand-new poetry books that hadn't been opened. When he asked her about them, she said, 'I love poetry, but I haven't read those...I'm saving them for my old age.' Mrs Batisse lived to read those books many times, and when she eventually died at 91, she was planning a trip to Europe.

Hope is wishing for something to come true; faith is believing it will happen. Hope is wanting something so desperately that despite all evidence to the contrary, you keep believing God for it. And the remarkable thing is that the act of hoping produces a strength of its own.

When Cornell University conducted a study on the effects of hope, Dr Harold G. Wolff reported that people with hope can endure incredible burdens. One group comprised twenty-five thousand soldiers imprisoned during World War II. Subjected to forced labour, bad food and filth, many died while others showed only slight damage. Interviews with survivors revealed a far-above-average ability to hope! How were they able to keep their hope alive? By drawing pictures of the girls they planned to marry, designing their future homes and organising business management seminars. Hope not only kept them well, it kept them alive! This is why Paul describes hope as 'strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls, connecting us with God himself' (Hebrews 6:19 TLB).