#FUCKING BAGGINSHIELD ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

[sandinthepipes]

I have just realised that a lot of my favourite ships fall into the-prince-and-the-pauper bin???? And i wasn't even aware??????

#no listen to me #the most obvious here is merthur #we all know the literal prince of camelot and the guy who grew up sleeping on rocks #but also geraskier #fucking el dorado which i know for those non italian isn't a big thing but here let me tell you I'd give my life for those two fucking idio #like tullio comes from old money and miguel can barely read because he grew up on the street and that's all canon baby #and then I thought fucking sinbad #proteus and simbad are again the literal prince and the kid in ragged clothes he found on the street #i don't know how their ship is called nore miguel and tullio #FUCKING BAGGINSHIELD ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME #EVEN BLACKSTEDE #FUCKING NANDERMO GUYS NANDOR WAS A FUCKING PRINCE AND GUILLERMO HAD TO STEAL MONEY TO BUY A FRIDGE #i am loskng my mind how did i never noticed all of this #btw it all started from me thinking that pedro pascal would make a great sinbad #and orlando bloom a great proteus and then they'd kiss #shit fuck now i gotta investigate all my other past obsession because I'm beginning to suspect a pattern #is this my subconscious telling me i want a sugar daddy #merthur #geraskier #bagginshield #blackstede #nandermo #miguel x tulio #sinbad x proteus #otp #pairing dynamic #inthepipes

[lucigoo]

Bagginshield Fic Rec List

So, here I will add all of the amazing Bagginshield fics I adore. I hope you like at least one, they all deserve love 💖💖💖

And as always, if its your fic, or you know whos let me know so i can @ them, they all deserve to be recognised!

Below the Belt - LordOfTheRazzles @lordoftherazzles

A Complaint A Day... - birdkeeperklink (speculating) @birdkeeperklink

Of Blacksmiths and Blackberries - littlebrownshoe (Wolfy_Tales)

He loves me, he loves me not - Alse_the_hobbit @hobbityalse

(Take Me Back To) The Night We Met - LordOfTheRazzles, MiraHerondale - @lordoftherazzles @consultingpacha

Fuck Thy Neighbor - LordOfTheRazzles @lordoftherazzles

An Almost Perfect Christmas - Ticklesivory @tickles-ivory

A King's Bond - mordelle @mordellestories

(Almost Believing) This One's Not Pretend - diemarysues

Lost and Found - Ticklesivory @tickles-ivory

The Danger In Missing You - Fantasyinallforms @fantasyinallforms

Child's Play - Anonymous - The Hobbit (the Company as kids, gen fic)

Letters from the Mountain - Middle_Earth_Mama @middleearthmama

Beyond the Pixels - Ticklesivory @tickles-ivory

Hold Me Down Until The Madness Ends - licha_nick

“I’zigh ‘Akshith” (War Surprise) - Ticklesivory @tickles-ivory (The slow burn is beautiful and the idea is so clever and unique imo)

327 Blossom Street - Ticklesivory (Tickles does modern Bagginshield so well)

Slow Dance: A Bagginshield SMAU - Ticklesivory (Modern day social media fic, its awesome)

The Bunny Saga - alkjira - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, its so cute and clever) Sweet Synthesis - Ticklesivory - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, another craker from @tickles-ivory, with Cyborgs!) A Passion For Mushrooms - Chrononautical - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, beautiful world building and pining idiots) Behind the Money - SunnyRose - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, @sunnyrosewritesstuff wrote an adoarble tea ahop AU) No Small Amount of Courage - SunnyRose - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, another wonderful fic from @sunnyrosewritesstuff where Bilbo loves so hard its enough)

A Hobbit's Gamble - CQueen - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, Arranged Marriage Au in Erebor, and its precious, from start to end)

Wings from Ravens - IShipGayShit_SueMe - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, BAMF Bilbo, with wings. Need I say more)

Wild Wings - DomesticGoddess - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, As always everythign DG worites slaps so hard. This was my first ever wing fic read and i became obsessed its that good)

A Black-feathered Omen - birdkeeperklink (speculating) - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, another wing fic, and sad, loely Thorin who needs a hug, or a hobbit...)

Let The Waking Morning Find - sunryder - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, this is legit one of my fav Bagginshield fics ever, its clever and emotional and the thought of the One Ring gaining a body and becoming fixated on Bilob is spine chilling)

I don't belong (and my beloved, neither do you) - FrozenBrownie - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, mpreg, its heartbreaking and beautiful and a hea all rolled into one) None So Blind - Chrononautical - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, Beautifully writte fic, woth Blind Bilbo and aftermath of BOTFA) the world is sleeping (my world is you) - katheneverwrites (mandolinearts) - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, Thorin as a sweet Hades is just so precious) An Unexpected Friend - smoltimidturtle - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, Bilbo gets a pet, its adorable, Thorin doesnt think so, a really cute reshirement fic) My Sister's Boyfriend - DomesticGoddess - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, as always DomesticGodess hits the spot you didnt know needed hitting. Jelous Thorin is perfect!) Now You Know - Arkan_Sonney - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, Its very cute and fluffy and Frodo needs all the hugs)

Sansûkh - Chapter 1 - determamfidd - Multifandom (Multiple LOTR pairings, not sure if it eeds any interoduction, other then EPIC!)

Planting a Hobbit - northerntrash - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, The dwarves are adorable and its just a wonderful fic,)

May Your Forge Burn Bright - LordOfTheRazzles - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, once again @lordoftherazzles wrote an amazing fic, the world building and relationship between Bilbo and Thorin is stunning)

Bad Blood - Conkers - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, a clever little What If fic fom @conkers-thecosy, BAMF Bilbo is best Bilbo and OCnkers did it perfectly.)

If I could give my breath away (I would) - StupidFatPenguin - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, even with having lost his memory, Thorin is so precious in hiw quikly he falls in love Bilbo.)

(s)wiped out - I_did_not_mean_to, sandwich11213 - The Hobbit - (undercurrent of Bilbo/Thorin, the Bagginshield is subtle, but beautiful, and worth the entire fic to get to it this is a work of art, both the fic and the actual art)

Worlds separated by a garden fence. - TheCuriousCat - The Hobbit (Fem Bilbo/Thorin, one of my fave series, Durins are fae and Bilbo is BAMF!)

Guardian of Kings - SunnyRose - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, another excelent work by @sunnyrosewritesstuff, and im sure most bagginshielders love a bit of BAMF Bilbo and cultural misunderstanding, I know i do!) Summary: The Company has been having a good laugh as the story of their quest spreads through the mountain and more and more retellings makes Thorin out to be Bilbo’s damsel in distress. It stops becoming funny when Thorin’s honor is challenged, and it’s up to Bilbo to defend it. Thorin may be ready to smuggle his hobbit out of the mountain, but Bilbo will do it. For Thorin, he would do anything.

The Gift of Hobbits - MoroseBarnacle - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, and its just SO good!) Summary: The gift of hobbits is a secret not known to dwarves. Bilbo’s gift saves the Company—repeatedly—and they don’t even know it until after Smaug is dead. But by then, just about everybody knows there’s a hobbit in Erebor, and the invading orcs decide to keep Bilbo and his otherworldly gift for themselves.

Home - SunnyRose - The Hobbit (Gen fic, Written by the wonderful @sunnyrosewritesstuff an adorable look at Uncle Thorin. )

Summary: Being an uncle doesn't come instinctual to Thorin. He loves his nephews with all his heart, but he doesn't quite understand them. However, when Dís needs far across the distance - LinguisticJubilee - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, this one is lovely imo) Summary: Balin blinks, shifting backwards. “Laddie, it’s—it’s been a year. Bilbo has returned home, to the Shire.” He looks at Thorin, then says more gently, “I did not realize you counted the hobbit among your treasures.”

Guardian of Kings - SunnyRose - The Hobbit by @sunnyrosewritesstuff (Bilbo/Thorin, one of my favs from Sunny, its clever and the world building, its just delicious) Summary: The Company has been having a good laugh as the story of their quest spreads through the mountain and more and more retellings makes Thorin out to be Bilbo’s damsel in distress. It stops becoming funny when Thorin’s honor is challenged, and it’s up to Bilbo to defend it. Thorin may be ready to smuggle his hobbit out of the mountain, but Bilbo will do it. For Thorin, he would do anything. Prize Enough for Me - StrivingArtist - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, BAMF Bilbo for the win, need I say more?) Summary: After falling in love months earlier with the Dwarven King, when Bilbo sees Thorin stabbed on Raven Hill, he decides to find vengeance. mercy and death on swift arrows fly - authoressjean - The Hobbit (Gen, hinted eventual Bagginshield, another BAMF Bilbo, but also, hes just lovely no matter what) Summary: Hunger Games AU with slow burn Bagginshield.

Not All That Glitters (Is Good For Your Health) - comatosecombat - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, post quest for Erebor) Summary: In his attempt to distract Smaug from attacking Lake-town, Bilbo accidentally destroys the One Ring of Power, saves the day and brings peace on Middle-Earth.

When it comes to him and Thorin, that resolves absolutely nothing. An Unexpected Addition - karategal - The Hobbit (Bilbo/Thorin, this whole series is pure gold imo)

Summary: All of the dwarves survive the Battle of the Five Armies, but Bilbo must return to the Shire to sort out his old life and make way for a new one in Erebor. Over one year later, Bilbo comes back to the Lonely Mountain with a recently orphaned Frodo. King Thorin isn't quite sure what to make of this new, tiny addition to his Company. far across the distance - LinguisticJubilee - The Hobbit - (Bilbo/Thorin, schmoopy Thorin has my whole heart)

Summary: Balin blinks, shifting backwards. “Laddie, it’s—it’s been a year. Bilbo has returned home, to the Shire.” He looks at Thorin, then says more gently, “I did not realize you counted the hobbit among your treasures.” far across the distance - LinguisticJubilee - The Hobbit - (Bilbo/Thorin, schmoopy Thorin has my whole heart)

Summary: Balin blinks, shifting backwards. “Laddie, it’s—it’s been a year. Bilbo has returned home, to the Shire.” He looks at Thorin, then says more gently, “I did not realize you counted the hobbit among your treasures.” What to do when one has died? Dig of course. - DBlack13 (Bilbo/Thorin, Afterlife fic, I repeate Afterlife fic (not that i have a fav trope or anything .....)

Summary: After death, Bilbo is bored. He misses his adventures, and although Yavanna’s Garden is everything a hobbit would wish for, Bilbo can’t help missing his friends in the Company, and above all, a certain blue-eyed leader… Makes the Whole World Blind - Chrononautical - The Hobbit (Bagignshield, I love when they are feral for one another)

Summary: Bilbo Baggins has been kidnapped. Thorin Oakenshield considers a proportional response. Nori Needs a Burglar - SunnyRose - The Hobbit @sunnyrosewritesstuff (Bagginshield, this is so clever and Bilbo getting caught in shennanigans accidently is *chef'f kiss*) Summary: In charge of distracting Bilbo from their party plans, Nori tells the hobbit about a problem they've been having in the treasury. Of course, Bilbo being Bilbo, he managed to stumble upon a conspiracy against the Crown. Unbreakable - Fantasyinallforms - The Hobbit @fantasyinallforms (Bagginshield, ngl, im not usually fond of the sex pollen trope as a personal prefrence, but this one is done so well and its all about the feels, its wonderfuly written) Summary: Bilbo and Thorin are captured coming back from a diplomatic mission to the elf king's halls. Their captures have no intention of killing the great Thorin Oakenshield outright; instead, they seek to break him and attempt to use Bilbo to do it. Bruises on the Heart - thehufflepuffhobbit - The Hobbit (Bagginshield, oblivious idiots, i'm looking at you Thorin, is always such a delicious plotline) Summary: 5 times Thorin noticed his soulmate’s bruises and 1 time he gave them one.

With a tie not easy to break - MiraHerondale - The Hobbit (Bagginshied woth alternate first meeting, this amount of sweetness isnt good for my heart) Summary:

“Finally”, said the hobbit, frowning despite his rushing heart. “I was worried.” The smial was deadly silent behind him, which was surprising, considering how loud the dwarfs had been moments prior. Yet he refused to turn around and check. “Worried? I thought we were angry.”

Fic for Thauc with the prompts "Bilbo and Thorin met before the Quest, fell in love and got married (in secret or not). How does that affect the Quest?" and "Thorin and Bilbo having an awkward and terrible hookup in Bree several months before the quest and then meeting at the quest." Clue-finder - TheGrayKnight - The Hobbit (Bagginshield, Bilob being accidently BAMF is brillaint) Summary: Bilbo originally asked to meet with Balin to discuss what he could do to help restore Erebor. He had no idea Balin would turn it around and talk about dwarven courting customs.

#bagginshield #fic rec list #enjoy #a few gen fics in there #Fem Bilbo #Hunger Games Au #Consort Bilbo

[weasley-detectives]

Just got around to watching the final episode of Rings of Power - it was a blast. Not as good as the Mount Doom episode, and I sort of wish we'd spent more time and build up with Halbrand schmoozing with everyone in Eregion, but these are minor complaints. I'm just really hoping all the miserable moany gits will have buggered off by the time season 2 swings around. This is the series I've been hoping for since I was a wee kid. I didn't expect to love it (and especially the characters) as much as I do. But it sure would be nice if I could enjoy it without coming on here and being attacked for doing so, or finding the tags absolutely fuckin flooded with hate. I still don't get it. I mean yeah, Amazon is the devil, buuuut New Line weren't exactly angels or has everyone conveniently forgotten what happened in New Zealand during the filming of The Hobbit? And yeah, they've changed a lot and condensed the timelines to make for a slicker visual media friendly timeline. But no more so than Peter Jackson did.

I just think the standards some people have set for this show were ridiculously high and the negativity is fucking exhausting. I mean I'm all for critique, but the complaints I keep coming across border on unhinged. But hey, I'm new to Tolkien fandom so maybe it's always been like this. My love for Tolkien has always been very much outside of fandom. It's a childhood love, the kind of books I pick up when I'm feeling low or nostalgic. It wasn't until I absolutely fell for Bagginshield that I stepped into the fandom, and I've heard from others that Tolkien fans can be, er, intense. (I remember them from uni. They were scary. And by scary I mean the kind of tweed clad Oxford arsehole I used to pickpocket down the pub).

Edit- sorry, I need to add this because this is the level of criticism that grates me more than anything. One pretty popular Youtube Tolkien vlogger suggested that the "Halbrand is Sauron" reveal could be vastly improved/retconned by Isildur discovering the real Halbrand's body. Thus, the real Sauron only appeared after the eruption of Mount Doom. They continued to say that they doubted this would ever happen because "the show is not clever enough to do so".

That... That kind of bait and switch is not clever writing. Especially not in this medium. Can we please for the love of God get away from this idea that being too obvious and not cheaply shocking your audience at every bleeding turn is bad writing? I mean sure, there were some clues to Halbrand's identity which I would personally have changed/made a little more subtle, but leaving a trail of clues for the audience to follow and enjoy piecing together is strong writing, especially for weekly TV viewing. It's one of the reasons I hate the writing in Sherlock and later Game of Thrones seasons. When writers become obsessed with being cleverer than audiences, the writing tends to fall apart, because you need to follow through on the pieces you set up.

#rings of power #The rings of power #Tolkien #Rings of power spoilers #Weasley rants

[elhnrt]

as someone whos been from destiel bagginshield and stucky, seeing you say that mdtb spoiled you is hilarious af cuz im fucking starving here jfc 😭

DESTIEL SHIPPER

i kid i kid i can't say shit

in my defense i have a propensity to fall for ships that are severely um "underappreciated" (read: it's me and like 5 people and i'm like the only creator) (they make sense to ME) and at one point i've also created a ship tag for an old fandom otp of mine so having works in the thousands is unreal to me. lets just see some numbers from some faves

yeah..........

#ppppp #lenask #anonymous

[messiambrandybuck]

I posted 4,520 times in 2021

671 posts created (15%)

3849 posts reblogged (85%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 5.7 posts.

I added 1,301 tags in 2021

#aidan talks - 400 posts

#asks - 207 posts

#aidan answers - 196 posts

#anon - 137 posts

#ft. max - 66 posts

#saving for later - 63 posts

#the hobbit - 61 posts

#lotr - 59 posts

#tag game - 57 posts

#ask game - 55 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#my library as a kid had a bunch of dragon books and i read every single one of them /weekly/ and even compared the information between books

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

I went to write "stimboard" but stopped at "stimbo" and now so have some thoughts:

Bilbo ADHD Baggins (it's canon and you know it, don't be a coward)

His stims are generally pretty small and/or calm

ie: the nose wiggle a stim I also do

But it's mostly a product of masking as best as he can due to the gossip of Hobbiton (*cough cough lobelia cough cough*)

He also vocally stims by humming, which is half the reason why he comes up with so many songs and bits of poetry

(How we feeling about that handkerchief scene, with this in mind?)

After he joins the company, they obviously notice

If they know about the nervous system then I'm sure they know at least enough about ADHD/ADD to be like "oh hey-"

After a while (as they get closer to him) the dwarves read: Bofur give him the nickname "Stimbo Baggins"

He acts annoyed each and every time

but those drumming fingers don't lie

he loves it

and he loves that they don't make fun of him for his behavior, nor do they try to "fix" him

if anything, they subtly encourage him to do it more often

especially after a very stressful event

they mostly do this by copying one/some of his stims

and then his brain does the rest

bagginshield moment where Bilbo and the durin boys all bond over being neurodiverse

and explaining how neurodiversity works

(that's mostly because I saw this one autistic!thorin headcanon, and I think an ADHD!kili one?)

kili and bilbo bonding moments where kili slowly shares his experiences with having adhd, along with all the little tips and tricks his mother and uncle taught him

he teaches bilbo a bunch of neat tricks that actually end up being of huge help

bilbo and thorin stimming in their own little ways because they just love each other sm (*glares at bagginshield haters*) and cause this happy stim chain

uhm- i could go farther with this but I really didn't mean to do this much-

@annkdarar @claraofthepen @beenovel @tolkien-fantasy

150 notes • Posted 2021-08-29 02:15:22 GMT

#4

Merry: Hey, Bro? Pippin: Yeah Bro? Merry: Can you pass me that pamphlet? Pippin: Brochure Elrond, crying: How did you get in my house

184 notes • Posted 2021-09-09 16:18:14 GMT

#3

My mum just read out a news article from her phone: "Gen Z is made of zombies — less educated, more depressed, without values"

I have never been more pissed off in my life.

We are "less educated" because we've realized how thoroughly packed with shit the public school education system is: a lot of us, because of this realization, have stopped taking school seriously. That isn't us being "less educated". That's us being more informed than you have ever been, but without the resources or support to fix anything.

We are "more depressed" because you have ruined our planet- our justice system- or futures, for fuck's sake. We are "more depressed" because we have the resources to see just what is happening in the rest of the world, what is happening in other homes (whether worse than our own situations or better), and wondering why no one is talking about it in real life- why we had to figure this out by ourselves instead of being taught by our elders and educators. We are "more depressed" because we are more informed about all of the common, and toxic behaviors we are met with on a day-to-day basis by those we love and trust. We are "more depressed" because we acknowledge just how fucking horrible this world has become because of the generations before us.

We a not "without values". No. We are not the ones calling our peers snowflakes. We are not the ones denying our peers basic rights. We are the ones trying to fix this fucked-up society. We are the ones fighting to make this world just a little less horrible than it is. We are the ones fighting to give other religions, identities, expressions, sexualities, and ethnic backgrounds their basic rights to live without being harassed just for existing. We have values. You just refuse to acknowledge them because we are "young" and "ignorant". You refuse to acknowledged the fact that we, due to these "damn technologies", are more educated and informed than many of our older relatives and peers; you are threatened by this, and therefore belittle us to be "snowflakes" and -apparently- "zombies".

212 notes • Posted 2021-08-22 22:27:39 GMT

#2

Legolas: You're making me claustrophobic

Merry: What does claustrophobic mean?

Sam: It means he's afraid of Santa Claus

Legolas: No it doesn't

Merry:

Merry: Ho ho ho!

Sam: Stop it, Mister Merry, you're scaring him!

221 notes • Posted 2021-09-22 14:56:32 GMT

#1

I'm in the constant state of wanting to watch The Hobbit Trilogy, but refusing to acknowledge canon character deaths

392 notes • Posted 2021-08-01 03:03:05 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[waitingformycheesetomelt]

read that fanfiction they said. its fun they said. who am i kidding noone told me to do anything except that stupid bio said "bagginshield, alternate universe, slowburn, friends to lovers, feels, abuse of feels" so WHAT in the name of jolkien rolkien rolkien tolkien was I SUPPOSED TO DO.

it was from 20FUCKING13, completed, 50 chapters and THE FIRST THREE CHAPTERS HAD ME TO TEARS because it was well written and bilbo crushed my heart and i was weAk

and i keep on reading because lets fucking face it, im a masochist and after MARRIAGE PROPOSAL AND 1 I REPEAT 1 KISS THEY DID NOT DELIVER A SEX SCENE

GOOD WOMAN YOU HAD ME PINING FOR THIS AND DIDNT DELIVER I AM MAD

#bagginshield #bagginshield smut #i hate it here #fandom #the hobbit botfa #the hobbit #bilbo baggins #thorin oakenshield #thorin x bilbo #fanfiction #abuse of feels #fanfic #fanfic feels

[wanderingnork]

Writer Tag Game

Tagged by @pinkfadespirit :D and tagging anyone who feels like jumping in.

How many works do you have on AO3?

215 fics, going to be 216 in...roughly twenty minutes from the time I post this.

What’s your total AO3 word count?

1,197,026 words.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

The Protector (1100 kudos, Protestant Reformation/Dishonored fusion)

a better mirror (994 kudos, Fantastic Beasts)

Everything Important in a Suitcase (844 kudos, more Fantastic Beasts)

Going Home (670 kudos, one of my only bagginshield fics)

i am stretched on your grave (660 kudos, written because Infinity War made me cry)

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Absolutely, whenever I can! On some of my more popular fics (read: a better mirror), I was getting so many comments at once that keeping up was virtually impossible. I did my best, but a lot fell through the cracks. These days, writing for smaller and less popular ships, things are SO much more manageable.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

the quaking citadels of men is definitely it. I flexed my horror-writing muscles and I think I really achieved something great!

The entire cast dies at the end.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Unequivocally “a better mirror.” Everybody lives, it’s hopeful and happy all the way down, nothing bittersweet at all. Ignore the rest of the series. XD

Do you write crossovers? If so, What is the craziest one you’ve ever written?

Unfortunately, although it’s technically in the “crossovers” section, I don’t count Purely Commercial Speech because the U.S. government canonically exists in the Pacific Rim universe. (Is this a pitch? Yes, it is. It’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever written, please read it.)

Which means that Task Force Winchester, a Suicide Squad (2016)/Supernatural crossover, takes the spot as the craziest one I’ve written.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

No, I don’t think so. If I did, it’s been so long I’ve forgotten.

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

On occasion. I tend to lose track of the “sexy” stuff because I like smut that focuses on something a little more realistic, with imperfect bodies, awkward moments, and occasional derailments. Also, I absolutely suck at keeping track of where people’s limbs are going, and more than once have sat there going “when the FUCK did you get a third hand???” Editing is important here XD

And yet somehow people tell me that the stuff I write is hot.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! gravity of tempered grace has a Russian translation and so does The Protector, The Thing In The Mirror has a French translation, and I’m aware that a Chinese translation of Task Force Winchester was written (with permission), but unfortunately it was never put on AO3, so I have no way to find it.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Lots of co-writing when I was a kid, before I ever discovered internet fandom. I co-wrote a fic for Fantastic Beasts (see you on the other side) with @chryselephantinechaos and writingramblr (whose tumblr I unfortunately can’t find now). I handled the SFW stuff: they did the smut.

Currently co-creating a whole AU with @apfelgranate: in a similar vein, she’s handling most of the smut and I’m sticking almost strictly to SFW stuff.

What’s your all-time favourite ship?

To be honest? Y’all, I’m still Dean/Cas trash. I dropped away from the show, but that ship grabbed me by the shoulders, shook me, and said this is what you’re sticking with. It’s good.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Never going to finish Black Magic Women, because I’ve really moved on from that, and I do regret that.

What are your writing strengths?

Worldbuilding, hands down. I’m at my best when I get to play with a big open sandbox and fill in gaps. How many people should really be in the Inquisition, if they’re fielding a thousand troops? What’s the actual food like in the Citadel? Did women work in police forces in the 1800s? That’s what’s fun to me, and I think it shows.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I fucking suck at brevity. Sometimes that’s good (it’s fine to write another novel), and sometimes...sometimes I JUST WANT TO WRITE A THOUSAND WORDS AND BE DONE. but no.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I’m monolingual, so I generally avoid it. I’m not averse to including scattered words and phrases when appropriate (and when I know I’m getting it right), and whenever sign language comes up I do try to get that right.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

I was writing for Star Wars with a friend when I was 9 or so. We co-wrote whole novels about self-insert characters having amazing adventures during the Clone Wars. Remarkably angsty, all things considered. My first mega-fic, though, was for the Maximum Ride series. In hindsight, I should absolutely polish it up and put it out for public consumption, because if I can overcome the cringe of the early parts and ditch the alarming heteronormativity...look, the ending is really good.

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

Why would you make me choose.

Probably, at this point, it’s Speaker for the Dead, a Wizard101 fic. While technically it’s not my best work, it’s personally meaningful, and I think...quite possibly the most moving thing I’ve ever written.

 But the point is not in what the living do.

 The point is in the memory of the dead.

#nork rants about writing

[helisol]

ye s, well

it basically came to me like a prophet receiving a vision from an angry god. you know. like brian david gilberts video ideas but with more slow burn.

no really i wrote all this down in my phone’s note app because some nearly coherent things popped up in my head every time i was on the train or bus these last few days.

(after-actually-writing-this disclaimer/note: this is 2000 words of slightly edited rambling about Bagginshield in the Afterlife. i had to put it in a read more.)

so the gist of it

the botfa goes just as in the movie with minor details altered. like bilbo kissing thorin just before he dies which inadvertently causes a ripple in time and space that makes the valar curious of them both. you know. minor stuff.

so bilbo goes back to the shire, the war of the ring goes down, and the hobbit/elf gang sails to valinor at the end. classic stuff, not much alternating of universes here.

but here’s where things turn into the “my city now” meme because DUDE DO I HAVE A LOT OF THOUGHTS ABOUT VALINOR AND HOW THE AFTERLIFE WORKS

like, I’m sorry mister jolkien rolkien tolkien, but just putting people into a hall to await being judged like a hospital waiting room? snooze, that’s boring!

so first of all, and you can fight me on this, Yavanna Made The Hobbits And You Can’t Change My Mind.

it just makes sense for her to have been very saddened by the destruction of literally all her work on arda through melkor’s poison, so she made living, growing things that could protect themselves from harm. as opposed to the ents, by the way, which were made by Eru to protect all the other living, growing things. it was a nice gesture of Eru to make those, but not quite what Yavanna wanted or had in mind, i imagine.

as with the dwarves, Eru wasn’t all happy about the existence of another race he didn’t make but you know, whatever, ‘I’ll just let this married couple have their own kids aside from mine, it’s okay’.

so he hands both the dwarves and the hobbits independent thought and free will, but under the condition (and here is where the afterlife stuff comes into play) that Aule and Yavanna be responsible for their mortal creations after their death. meaning that both races have seperate afterlives from the halls of mandos, MEANING THAT ITS COMPLETELY FINE FOR AULE AND YAVANNA TO BE LIKE “oh look honey, these two are so very in love and remind me of us, shan’t we do something about that?”

so. they do something about that. more precisely, they rearrange their afterlife-realms so they’re next to each other and someone with enough willpower could cross through the barrier. because listen, they’re valar, they can do whatever they want just for kicks.

okay so after that tangent lets get back to the meat of the matter: gay dwarves. I know not everyone has read Sansukh, a 500k word mammoth of a fic, and I don’t really intend to copy any of det’s canon, but their version of The Halls of Mahal really inspired me. basically the dwarven afterlife is one big hunk of a mountain/underground city where they’re free to live their days until dagor dagorath doing what they do best in the company of their families and friends; like smithing, crafting, building and other JustDwarrowThings.

meanwhile the hobbit afterlife is Basically The Shire and instead of being given the materials to build things, all the hobbits who go there get to grow plants and do their gardening. they don’t have to- just like none of the dwarves have to craft stuff- since there’s always enough food for everyone, but they are just allowed to do what they do best if they so desire.

now when Bilbo arrived in the undying lands he was still Old As Hell and im sorry to put it this way, he definitely kicked the can after like, a week of living there. not really so undying, them lands, huh. anyway Bilbo bites the dust and LOOK AT THAT he’s suddenly young again, and another LOOK AT THAT he’s standing in a very comfy, but Not Quite Bag End hobbit hole that has a note hung up on the front door. you wouldn’t think gods could have handwriting but hey, again, they’re gods they can do whatever. the note just tells him that yavannah made this place special and just for Bilbo but that there’s another home waiting for him. very cryptic there, lady. he doesn’t leave at first because hey, his family is here. there’s a lot of reunions and celebrating and food because its the fucking hobbit afterlife, what else would you expect

it takes him a few days of Regular Hobbit Life in his new home to realise ‘holy shit, this is so boring’ so what does a Fool of a Took do when things get boring and there’s a note urging him to do something?

HE’S GOING ON AN ADVENTURE

so Bilbo runs through the whole not-shire, meeting all sorts of people he outlived on the way (looking at you, Lobelia), as well as some elves. because elves can definitely just waltz through all the afterlives. they can walk on top of snow, you think they wouldn’t walk around wherever they please in valinor? rip to mankind, but they’re different.

he gets to the furthest reaches of it eventually, and lo and behold, what awaits him but the view of a tall mountain, an invisible barrier and a very flustered Thorin who is at his wits end as to how Bilbo even got here.

now for thorin’s part of the story we’ll have to start after the botfa again. he basically woke up in the darkness like an episode of naked and afraid, and started talking to Aule. his maker, who loves him to bits by the way since he made thorin, just tells him he’s free to go wherever his heart takes him. again with the cryptic messages from the gods.

so thorin, still very self-loathing and bitter because of his actions right before his death, sees this as Mahal’s way of saying ‘please don’t step foot in my halls u disgusting litle creacher’, when really he just meant ‘please do some well deserved self reflecting and then come inside to be with your family, they all miss you terribly’.

after his chat with the maker thorin just spawns in right at the front gate of the mountain and he has a choice to make. go inside or stay outside. and we all know Thorin’s proclivity for drama so he basically spends LITERAL YEARS just living in self imposed solitary confinement.

oh also tiny hc here, thorin was said to have taken “any work offered to him in the towns of men”, and they showed him in a smithy, but personally I believe they meant it when they said “any kind of work”. so basically thorin is a jack of all trades, master of some. he definitely has master-level skills in certain areas though, enough to build a vaguely hobbit-hole shaped house. why is it hobbit hole shaped?

oh right, the part where Thorin is absolutely enamoured with Bilbo.

"Go back to your books and your armchair, plant your trees, watch them grow. If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.”- HELLO? GAY POLICE? I’D LIKE TO REPORT A CASE OF ‘DWARF KING REALISING THAT THE HOBBIT WAY OF LIVING IS A REALLY GREAT ONE IN CONCEPT / WISHING HE COULD HAVE HAD THAT KIND OF LIFE WITH BILBO’

anyway it’s a long 80 years until Thorin does get to meet Bilbo again, and in the meantime we have one of my favorite additions to any Hobbit fanfic ever: Frerin

For the uninitiated, Frerin is Thorin’s brother. They also have a sister, Dís, but Tolkien never specified when she died and she was a bit younger than Thorin and Frerin so I reckon she’d still be alive as an old dwarf lady somewhere?

Anyway, Frerin. Oh boy. Sansukh, again, does an excellent job at turning Frerin into a character with a level of authenticity that gets real fucking close to Genuine Tolkien™, so most of my own characterisation of Frerin is based on that in Sansukh. With the important omission of the dwarves not being able to see the present/their still alive loved ones in middle earth through a magic mirror pool.

so Frerin takes it upon himself to leave the mountain in search of his brother because he really does want him back. but also because Mahal has had it with Thorin’s antics and suggests Frerin fetch him so he can finally reunite with his family. Mahal doesn’t talk to the dwarves a lot because he’s like an awkward and distant dad, but he does actually speak to them.

so Thorin is supposed to go see his family, which he does, but not immediately. it takes like, a solid year of just brotherly (and sister-sonly) companionship for him to open up about all his anxieties and regrets and THEN he goes into the mountain to cry in his mother’s lap. as you do.

however Thorin still feels like he doesn’t 100% belong with the other dwarves in there, so he frequently spends long stretches of time outside, building away at his house, thinking about Bilbo. the company goes out to visit him sometimes.

more details on the house tho, cuz it’s Important; it’s built halfway into a hill near the mountain, like a proper hobbit hole would be, but the lower levels are built into stone. look, he’s had 80 years to work on constructing this. it’s near perfect in every way for both hobbit and dwarf standards and could definitely fit the entire company and more inside.

now about the barrier. elves can pass through without a second thought because they’re shiny little bastards who just get to do all the cool stuff, but the other races can’t just hop between realms like that; they really have to muster up the willpower. which usually means they can’t do it because a drawback for both dwarves and hobbits is that they favor isolation from other races even in death, and as such don’t want to mingle with each other.

unless you’re Bilbo Badass Baggins though, who simply runs through the barrier to yell at Thorin for leaving him sad and alone for 80 years. he is that bitch.

there’s gonna be some legolas and gimli shenanigans if i can fit them in (cuz i dont know when exactly they sailed west together), possibly a mention of tauriel because bruh peter jackson did us dirty by not giving her any closure besides ‘lol i guess she’s banished from mirkwood??’ and Mairon. because. I also have some thoughts about him.

also Fili and Kili as pseudo matchmakers because every fic needs that

and did I mention there’s gonna be hozier lyrics for chapter titles

i said this was the gist of it but i somehow ended up at ~1900 words. well, more power to me.

#bagginshield #the hobbit #bagginshield afterlife au #this is the most coherent plot summary I've ever done for a fic so please enjoy the trash #also it's my sleepover and I get to pick which parts of canon i'll adhere by

[newvegascowboy]

don’t trope me into this

tagged by @royedsasoei. Thanks! this turned into a very long list of my Opinions, so sorry about that. 

Rules: Bold whichever trope you like the most (or hate the least if you’re not a huge fan of either) of the following pairs: 

Slow burn or Love at first sight? 

love at first sight just feels so disney to me. the idea is romantic but is a little too cheesy to me. I like the idea of two people developing a relationship over time. 

Fake dating or secret dating?

i love the drama too much not to say secret dating! the reveal is always so fun and i love seeing other characters slowly cue in. 

Enemies to lovers or best friends to lovers or enemies to friends to lovers? 

again. i love drama too much not to pick this one. 

Oh no there’s only one bed or long distance correspondence?

I’ll be real with you, this is one of my favorite tropes. I think epistolary fics are super interesting anyway. They just have such a unique tone and sense of story telling. Plus, the longing. 

hurt/comfort or amnesia?

ok i mean, both are good, but amnesia fics are a favorite of mind. There’s something about watching someone mourn the death of their friend or lover, even though their friend is still alive and just doesn’t remember them. it gets me. 

Fantasy au or modern au? 

i don’t really like aus that much anyway, but if I read them I usually go for modern aus, just because fantasy is kind of hit or miss for me. 

mutual pining or domestic bliss? 

mutual pining goes along well with slow burn. sometimes it can be frustrating as hell knowing all problems could be solved if two assholes just talked to each other, but there’s also something relatable about just watching from afar. 

smut or fluff?

ok i mean, why not both, first of all. there has to be a good balance between the two imo, because too much fluff can get boring but i’ve also never been a fan of pwp. if they’re going to fuck, at least make it plot relevant. 

canon-compliant or fix-it?

i have read too many bagginshield and reddie fix its for me to not pick this one. For all my talk about not liking aus, canon compliant just hurts too much sometimes, and usually not in a good way. Also, my faves tend to get murdered and i liked to pretend i live in a world where they aren’t dead in a ditch, so im going to have to go with fix-it on this one. 

Reincarnation or character death?

just finished talking about how canon compliant sucks and here i am picking character death, but it’s only because i really don’t like reincarnation aus. i find that character death is a fun foray into super angsty one shots or short chapter fics, but if the story itself is centered around one person dying, then it gets a little drawn out and boring after a while. 

one-shot or multi-chapter?

just fuck me up fam if im not up unreasonably late clicking ‘next chapter’ then whats the Point 

kid fic or road trip?

im a slut for roadtrip fics and i can never find enough of them! i dont know if its the combination of confined spaces, pining, American gothic, or just the specific feel i get from road trip fics, but i love them. Also kid fics have to be written really well for me not to cringe through them and often times that’s not the case loll. 

sci-fi au or magic au?

oh man i love sci fi. I love it so much. I love robots and space and all that shit. both are valid and i love them, but again, it’s all about something to do with the overall feel of the story. I grew up playing Mass Effect and i have a permanent love for that type of sci fi. 

also i love aliens.

Arranged marriage or accidental marriage?

accidental marriage is so stupid and i love it. i always get a kick out of characters having their “oh shit we’re MARRIED?” moment. 

Time travel or isolated together?

perfect opportunity to hash out all your grievances and then bang it out, i guess. VERY classically trope-y in my opinion. 

High school romance or middle-aged romance?

im gay i can’t relate to high school romance, that’s for the hets. 

but in all honesty i like middle aged romance because i often find it in queer fanfiction, and something about two middle aged queer people finally figuring out their lives and realizing they can still find love just fuckin gets me. just a fan of the message that it isn’t too late. 

body swap or genderbend? 

fuckin sophie’s choice over here. I dont particularly like either of these. Genderbend is a little too uncomfortable for me and body swap strays dangerously into the territory of crack, but its the least objectionable. 

Angst or crack?

I get such visceral second hand embarrassment from crack fics. I don’t know how anyone can read them. I see the word crack and i sink into my shame. there’s a difference between humor and crack, and being on f*nfiction.net in 2014 ruined it for me. it was funny when i was fourteen. not so much anymore. 

Apocalyptic or mundane? 

my whole aesthetic is fallout and apocalyptic so OFC i have to go with this one. Something about the atmosphere really gets me. I think I make fallout aus for...probably every fandom i’ve ever been in? I think it presents a unique opportunity to tell a story about how humanity is scattered, but ultimately, we’re in it together, and it’s also a fun challenge to think about how the world has changed and how it works now that civilization is gone. Can’t help but think Mad Max and how fun everything about it is. Apocalypse AUs are always on the table for me. 

(tbh i’ve been thinking about a fallout/tua crossover for actual months and i have no idea how to pull it off, but that’s where my mind is) 

tagging @marvilus73 and anyone else if they want to do this! 

#kal talks #not fallout #tag game #this got way longer than it shouldve been i just love to talk about things i hate i guess! #super fun tho

[jusdegroseille]

Fic writer profile / profil d’écrivain.e de fanfic

Tagged by @misscamomille (thanks my fremd <3) je vais cependant écrire le reste en français car je publie en français héhé.

Author name: redcurrantjuice (AO3) / Redcurrant Juice (ff.net)

Sites: fanfiction.net et j’ai commencé à poster mes écrits sur AO3 aussi!

Fandoms: Haikyuu!!, Shingeki no Kyojin (Ereri)

Number of fics & total word count: 3 OS, et un recueil d’OS avec un.e ami.e ; en tout, ça fait 30 200 mots et quelques!

Your most popular fic and why you think it is: “Métro, boulot, dodo” qui est un OS Ereri, le premier “vrai” OS que j’ai écrit en fait! 47 favoris, 14 follow (les gens espèrent encore une suite ahah) et 13 reviews! Je pense que c’est la plus populaire parce que c’est sorti en même temps qu’une saison de SnK, et que l’univers est assez simple à comprendre, ce qui attire facilement les gens je pense. Et pis c’est assez drôle I quite like it!

Your top 3 personal favourites of your works: 1) “Everything is its in right place”, mon dernier OS sorti en avril. Parce que je m’y suis remise y a pas longtemps, parce que c’est le plus long que j’ai écrit, parce que je me suis rendue compte que j’étais capable d’écrire un truc et d’aimer. D’écrire quelque chose que j’aurais voulu lire dans le fandom. Y a beaucoup de sentiments dedans, et pour être honnête mes bêta-readers et moi on a sué pour le corriger donc ça a de la plus-value ahahah (thanks again my lovelies @misscamomille and @leonlvis). 2) Y a pas énormément de choix ahah donc  “Métro, boulot, dodo”, honnêtement j’aime bien l’ambiance qui y est décrite, ça mange pas de pain. 3) Un OS qui fait parti du recueil que j’ai écrit avec @leonlvis il y a plusieurs années, “HCUL CHALLENGE” (le principe était que l’on tirait au sort les pairing et l’on devait écrire dessus, on publiait un OS par semaine, en alternant entre @leonlvis et moi) ; le dernier publié par moi et qui est donc à mon sens le plus développé et le plus qualitatif parce que j’ai pris de l’expérience au fil des OS (ne vous attendez pas à des trucs de fou, les premiers sont vraiment moyens, mais j’étais jeune aussi ahah). C’est le SugaYama, une balade dans Paris et j’aime trop l’ambiance. Un rare ship puissant mais j’aime tellement l’idée que j’ai eu à l’époque que je compte bien le réécrire, avec d’autres persos peut-être, ou même en faire une fic à deux/trois chapitres.

Your fic rating count: T:3  M:1

Your top 5 tags most used in your fics: du coup y a pas de tags sur ff.net, mais je vais imaginer ce que j’aurais mis pour mes anciens OS: Teen Romance, Strangers to Lovers, Domestic Fluff, Teenage Drama.

A ship you’d like to write for but never have: aaaah je dirais. Yumikuri (SnK), enfin du wlw en général! J’écris (pour l’instant) que du mlm et je veux me diversifier. Je veux écrire du BoKuroo, du BoKurooAkaKenma or whatever the name of this OT4 is, mais en gros il faut qu’il y ait BOKUTO dedans. Le Oisuga aussi c’est pas mal. Sinon je me sens trop confortable dans mes fandoms actuels et j’ai l’impression que j’ai besoin de connaître à 100% un perso pour écrire dessus, ce pourquoi je me lance pas trop dans d’autres fandoms. Je lis pas mal sur Hamilton en ce moment mais je me sens pas capable d’écrire sur les persos (surtout que Alex est un perso super complexe j’ai l’impression que j’ai pas capté la moitié de ce qu’il est), pareil pour BNHA. PAR CONTRE faudrait que je me lance dans le Bagginshield (The Hobbit) ou Gimli x Legolas parce que eux je commence à bien les connaître et j’ai envie de faire partie de ce fandom héhé. Tolkien core <3

Three fic recs: comme j’écris en français je fais des fic recs en français (LOGIQUE, bien que je lise plus en anglais en ce moment).

1) “Le combat que j’ai décidé de mener” par @leonlvis ou SoyokazeHaru sur fanfiction.net : OUI OK je suis pas objective parce que c’est mon meilleur.e pote mais REALLY. En quelques mots : DaiSuga sur fond de UA historique/Moyen-Âge. UA précis et original avec un style super poétique. C’est trop beau et je dis pas ça parce que c’est mon bêta-reader également mais il nous faut plus d’écrits comme ça dans le fandom FR de Haikyuu. De manière générale, il faut réveiller le fandom FR de Haikyuu. C’est en cours.

2) “L’Egaré” de AsterRealm : voilà la seule qui est vraiment active dans le fandom, et MEINE GOTT. J’aime trop, voilà. J’aurais pu mettre d’autres écrits d’elle mais comme celui-ci est très récent (je ne l’ai pas terminé), et que c’est une dinguerie, voilà. En quelques mots : Akaashi et Oikawa, fantômes, exorcisme, childhood abuse, traditions à perpétrer dans la campagne japonaise. ça fout froid dans le dos mais en même temps c’est d’une poésie, un univers si complexe et complet, surtout. J’ose pas trop lire quotidiennement parce que je suis une grosse lâche mais c’est vraiment génial. C’est en cours.

3) Un dernier sur SnK cette fois ; “Another Day In Paradise” par sid kid (anciennement sokolin). J’aurais pu choisir “Passengers” qui est une fic religieuse pour mon pote et moi, notre modèle ultime d’Ereri parfait, mais je voulais être un peu moins prévisible donc voilà un super EreJean (c’est elle qui m’a fait aimer le EreJean and what a fucking ride). Toujours dans ses fanfics : des ados mal barrés, TW drogue et alcool, violence physique et mentale, des ados déglingués et passionnels. Mé c’est joli. Warning elle est abandonnée/en hiatus depuis pas mal d’années. Mais ça vaut quand même le détour !

I tag @gangstakaashi, I don’t really know them but I know they write!! Or used to! Feel free to not do it ahah (plus they’re french also)

#fanfiction #haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu rarepair #haikyuu!! #fanfic #fanfiction writer #french stuff #french fanfiction #fic writer profile #shingeki no kyojin #snk fanfiction #AO3 #fanfiction.net #writer

[lesbiankiliel]

Erina’s Brand-New Tolkienverse Fic Rec List

Happy Holidays, have Tolkienverse fic recs!

sorted by rating, oldest-to-newest according to my bookmarks, marked with * are special faves, and under the cut because so many amazing fics!

G

Finding Comfort by scarletjedi (7.2k, Gigolas, missing scenes, enemies to friends to lovers, book canon compliant)

*Color Me Mine by andquitefrankly (32k, Bagginshield, modern au, kindergarten au, they’re all about six, fluff, Smaug hordes crayons)

*A Detour to Your Heart by thekeyholder (9.8k, Bagginshield, modern au, Christmas, roadtrip through Europe)

*Elf-Friends by Lumelle (9.1k, Kiliel, Bagginshield, everyone lives/nobody dies, sex = marriage to Elves, Fili runs Erebor while Thorin is recovering)

Alone is a word not meant for you by authoressjean (5k, Bagginshield, modern au, Bilbo is Fili and Kili’s fave author)

*Breaking Tradition by ladyoakenshields (14k, Bagginshield, modern au, Halloween, fluff, established relationship, listen I don’t like Halloween but this fic is wonderful)

*Homecoming by alkjira (1.9k, Bagginshield, Kiliel, Bifur/Fili/Ori, Dís/canonical husband, fix-it, Dís is on a mission to get to know the ones said loved ones love and Víli is on a mission to get grandchildren, because dammit he’s not getting any younger.)

*****Love Me For Eternity by ladyoakenshields (223k, WIP, Bagginshield, How to Train Your Dragon au, fluff and angst, happy ending, this is pure brilliance, Kat is amazing ♥)

Those Who Stay by Poplitealqueen (3.1k, Durin family relations, Dáin is a kid, Dís is a kid, you just know they’re gonna end up in trouble)

Prince Kíli by Lunarflare14 (1.2k, Kiliel, Bagginshield, trans male Kili, Dwarf gender concepts, gender dysphoria, everyone is protective of Kili)

Truth, Honesty, and None of the Above by Ias (13k, Bagginshield, Kiliel, humour, engagement, secret relationships, Kili is an idiot)

*****Coffee and Floral prints by etux (3.6k, Bagginshield, modern au, humour, misunderstandings, Thorin owns a fancy café in Paris, Bilbo is a chef)

*****The Art of Searching for Yourself by etux (1.6k, Fili-centric, modern au, part of the Paris au, asexual Fili)

*****Candle Glow and Mistletoe by etux (29k, Bagginshield, modern au, pretending NOT to be married, Christmas shenanigans, established relationship)

*****Lights of Midnight by etux (2.9k, Bagginshield, Drogo/Primula, New Year’s Eve shenanigans, modern au)

*****where moments turn into forever by alkjira (1k, Bagginshield, Bofili, Kiliel, everyone lives/nobody dies, Shirement, established relationship, fluff, super cute)

*Cute Girls & Chemistry by starlightwalking (7.8k, fem!Kiliel, college au, aspec characters)

*****Hearts Will As Hearts Must by determamfidd (10k, Gigolas, Bagginshield, Kiliel, everyone lives/nobody dies, Legolas and Gimli meet upon Gimli’s moving to Erebor and they hate each other’s guts instantly, it gets better tho)

*****Glowing like Stars by snowmissus (soul_of_blaze) (2k, fem!Kiliel, mermaid au, absolutely freaking brilliant)

*****Ever On and On by yubiwamonogatari (2.9k, fem!Bagginshield, old ladies in love in the Shire)

*Stranger's Home by Sansael (1.2k, Dís/Dís’ wife, fix-it, everyone lives/nobody dies, family feels)

Merry Yuletide, From Erebor by starlightwalking (4.8k, Kiliel, Bagginshield, Yuletide, love confessions, Tauriel’s first Yule)

A Horse of Rohan by determamfidd (3.2k, Gigolas, canon compliant, Arod-centric, I have feels about a horse. A. Horse.)

*Twelve Months and Fifty Years by determamfidd (3.1k, Thorin & Frerin, Sansûkh appendix, afterlife doesn’t solve anyone’s problems, if you wanna cry read this)

*****Seldom All It Seems by starlightwalking (28k, fem!Kiliel, Sleeping Beauty au, angst with a happy ending)

*****Summer Lovin' by snowmissus (soul_of_blaze) (1.1k, fem!Bagginshield, fem!Kiliel, everyone lives/nobody dies, love confessions, flowers, summer in the Shire)

*****Snowflake Cave by RainbowUnderpants (fanart, fem!Kiliel, a very beautiful wintry picture ♥)

*****Cliché by mcmanatea (2.1k, fem!Bagginshield, firefighter au, cat in a tree, fluff, flirting)

*****what the stars confess when all is silence by MistakenMagic (8.7k, Bagginshield, Star Wars au, Force bond, PWP: Porg With Plot, Dís has dual lightsabers and is so cool)

T

Of Dwarfs, Plans & Courtships by alkjira (222k, Fili/Bofur, Bagginshield, Kili/?, crack, angst with a happy ending, courting)

*****The Courting Habits of the Line of Durin by diemarysues (54k, Bagginshield, slow burn, courting, Dwarves are fucking prudes, read also the rest of the series)

*****The Inevitable Love Story between Two Oblivious Idiots by Bgtea (116k, Bagginshield, Dwori, slow build, fix-it, letters)

The Search for Mad Baggins by Antarctica_or_bust (10k, Bagginshield, Frodo POV, fix-it, Frodo goes off to look for his Uncle Bilbo with Sam, Merry, and Pippin)

You're the only thing I want to see by authoressjean (2.3k, Bagginshield, modern au, Thorin has glasses but Bilbo had no idea)

*****Nothing Gold Can Stay by perkynurples (296k, Bagginshield, modern royalty, really slow burn, a fandom classic)

*Fall Down at Your Door by diemarysues (37k, WIP, Bagginshield, universe alteration, magic, Bilbo gets turned into a cat, most of the fic is in the form of letters)

I Sang In My Chains Like The Sea by orphan_account (56k, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Bagginshield, Aragorn/Arwen, implied Gigolas, Pacific Rim au)

Sometimes it's just that easy by authoressjean (2.8k, Bagginshield, modern au, sequel to Alone is a word not meant for you)

*Color by Numbers by andquitefrankly (46k, WIP, Bagginshield, sequel to Color Me Mine, everyone ships Bilbo and Thorin)

*****An Unexpected Addition by karategal (88k, Bagginshield, everyone lives/nobody dies, slow build, one of the first fics I read coming to this fandom and one of the best, read the rest of the series too)

**********Sansûkh by determamfidd (533k, WIP, Bagginshield, Gigolas + lots of others, lots of angst, glacial build, dead peanut gallery, everyone is dead but they’re hanging around, literally the best thing to ever grace this fandom or any fandom for that matter)

*A Most Sensible Idea by HildyJ (76k, Bagginshield, Dwori, arranged marriage au, Erebor never fell au, misunderstandings, pining, cultural differences)

*Oak and Mistletoe by HildyJ (55k, Bagginshield, Erebor never fell au, first meetings, fairy tale elements, falling in love, angst)

*****King's Ransom by Farasha (49k, Bagginshield, Kiliel, everyone lives/nobody dies, BotFA reimagining)

*The Lonely Isle by lily_winterwood (34k, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Bagginshield, Jurassic World au, raptor daddy Bilbo Baggins)

*****Cherry on the Cake by etux (1.4k, Bagginshield, modern au, part of the Paris au, demisexual virgin Thorin)

*Alone this Yuletide by Emsiecat (91k, Bagginshield, universe alterations, Shire au, fake/pretend relationship, Yuletide shenanigans, we all know where this goes *wink wink*)

Azhâr by yubiwamonogatari (152k, WIP, Bagginshield, Kiliel, Gigolas + others, everyone lives/nobody dies, angst, pining, fluff, fix-it, Thorin in the Shire, slow burn, Arkenstone may or may not be a Silmaril)

The Sons of Durin by KivrinEngle (95k, Bagginshield, modern au, follows the storyline of The Hobbit but in modern-day Scotland)

*Tamâmebrulu Id-Mudtu (Lullabies of the Heart) by rutobuka (comic, Bagginshield, everyone lives/nobody dies, sharing a bed, hurt/comfort, first kiss, all that good stuff)

*****The Took's Arrangement by snowmissus (soul_of_blaze) (62k, Bagginshield, arranged marriage au, Erebor never fell, one of the best arranged marriage au’s I’ve read)

*Of Iron by Poplitealqueen (16k, WIP, Bagginshield, Bifur/Ori, Kiliel, Bofur/Dwalin/Nori, canon divergence, Dáin joins the quest, Dáin is awesome)

Autumns That There Were by perkynurples (18k, Bagginshield, sequel to Nothing Gold Can Stay, modern royalty au, epilogue)

*****and sow a star divided in us by MistakenMagic (57k, Bagginshield, Star Wars au, the Force is shipper trash, Jedi Knight Bilbo, Jedi Master Thorin)

M

The Road Delivered Us Home by keelywolfe (117k, Bagginshield, alternate universe - canon divergence, canonical character death (not Thorin’s), slow burn)

The Unexpected Hobbit: A Journey by alkjira (193k, WIP, Bagginshield, Nwalin, Bilbo and Thorin's roles are reversed)

Bilbo Does Not Need Sex Advice (Especially Not From Officer Oblivious and Captain Clueless) (5.9k, Bagginshield, exactly what the title says, Fili and Kili give very bad no good sex advice)

Madness by orphan_account (33k, Bagginshield, Dwori, modern au, babysitter au)

Mistletoe by orphan_account (22k, Bagginshield, Dwori, modern au, babysitter au, Christmas)

*The Queen and her Burglar by snowmissus (soul_of_blaze) (3.7k, fem!Bagginshield, vaginal fingering, cunnilingus)

*****For The Ages Of A Day by perkynurples (50k, Bagginshield, sequel to Nothing Gold Can Stay, modern royalty)

E

Hidden Desires by lilithiumwords (7.4k, Bagginshield, smut)

Have At It by trulyunruly (11k, Bagginshield, smut, Thorin is a virgin)

Christmas is Coming by an_odd_ducky (1k, Bagginshield, modern au, PWP)

A Halo On Your Body by freakylemurcat (5.8k, Bagginshield, bathing, piercings, lots of them, read also the rest of the series)

*I'm Dreaming Of... by diemarysues (5k, Bagginshield, pre-slash, first kiss, first time, all kinds of smut, Christmas)

*Impartial Judge by bigmamag (46k, WIP, Harry Potter crossover, Gigolas, Kiliel, Viktor Krum/Hermione Granger, Bagginshield, Triwizard Tournament, Gimli is from Durmstrang, Legolas is from Beauxbatons, Legolas is part Veela)

*Deck the Halls and Dwarves and Quarries by diemarysues (6.3k, Bagginshield, everyone lives/nobody dies, Christmas shenanigans, Dwarf culture & customs)

*****Snowmelt by determamfidd (8.8k, Gigolas, missing Sansûkh scene, lots of smut, two nerds being dudes)

*Synergy by alkjira (7k, Dwagginshield, smut, dirty talk, mutual pining)

Where All Thy Beauty Lies by yubiwamonogatari (3.5k, Gigolas, established relationship, Glittering Caves)

Repurposing by katajainen (1.2k, fem!Bagginshield, PWP, Reshirement, a really hot summer day)

Spherule by yeaka (1.3k, fem!Kiliel, dom/sub, sex toys, bondage, PWP)

Not Rated

Song as Old as Rhyme by Wizards_Pupil (86k, Bagginshield, Dwori, Beauty and the Beast but with a twist, it has dragons)

Silence by jeza_red (7.8k, Thorin & Frerin, Sansûkh-verse, angst, but things get better, slowly but they do)

For Better or For Worse by TheEmcee (76k, Bagginshield, arranged marriage au, life debts, mutual pining, hurt/comfort)

#bagginshield #kiliel #gigolas #the hobbit #lotr #fic rec

[themarchrabbit]

Oof, sorry if this is a lot for one ask but I'm listing my top three favorites. What Tradition Told you, Something Blue, and Sparks for #1 (What inspired you to write the fic this way?) and #5 (What part was hardest to write?) please!

I have told this secret to several friends, i.e. Something Blue. But now I’ll tell the secret to you all.

Spite and “EVERYTHING YOU JUST SAID IS WRONG”

I’m a horticulturist who still dreams of being able to finish my degree properly and be a botanist. I love plants. I love studying them and how they work. And before I wrote Something Blue, I kid you not, A DAY BEFORE I STARTED, I read a Bagginshield fic that claimed Bilbo’s (NORTHERN MOUNTAIN CLIMATE) garden had orchids.

Rage. Pure, unadulterated, /RAGE/ and SPITE and me literally SHOUTING OUT LOUD “THAT IS NOT HOW ORCHIDS WORK”. Something Blue was started purely from PlantScience!Nerd Rage.

I was also hella fucking annoyed because back then people kept making Dain a villain. Dain is not a villain. My characterization did not line up with what we got, but gawd, I was so FUCKING ANNOYED with people making Dain out to be some horrid monster.

WTTY was actually inspired by the American TV show “Sons of Anarchy”, from back in the first season, and inspired by my own life experiences of being a dumbass teenager playing around in a world I was too young for.

Sparks, though, was not my idea. FoxDragon very generously helped me out of a bad situation in Real Life, and the entire world-building of that universe is from their creative mind, not mine. I’ve been writing the Nori/Dwalin history based on their work and ideas.

#fandom #fic #something blue #WTTY #Sparks #Fox Dragon

[mojoflower]

I just finished reading both of the latest fic recs in DNGG and like holy shit!!! They were so good!!! I usually don't read prison AUs but..!! I just wanted to say I love what you're doing. I've always wished authors would rec similar fics at the end of theirs, and you're doing that!! Thank you, it warms my heart (and gives me something to read while I wait for the update) to see that while you have such an AMAZING fic you don't forget about us and other authors either.

Oops, this is two months old, so probably Nonnie moved on, but:

Thank you!  I’ve had loads of fun reccing things in Do Not Go Gentle, mostly because I love to share, and also because updating twice a month is SO.  SLOW.  and y’all are such sweethearts to stick around for it all, and this way, you’ve got something to fill in the long pauses.

Here are the recs (Sterek unless stated otherwise) from the chapter that Nonnie mentioned, just in case you’re sitting around bored today, and have a weekend full of nothing better to do then consume fic:

Those Hidden Places by Mimiminaj A delicious prison AU that is actually pretty fluffy. (The non-con gets headed off before anything terrible happens, if that would have stopped you. Although you’re reading /this, so probably you’d have been fine with it.) Really enjoyable: sweet and hot and touching. It’s all Derek POV, and watching Stiles flail and ramble and (eventually) flirt from his perspective is a joy.

Is That A Wand In Your Pocket Or? by reptilianraven The one where Stiles is a magician who performs at kid’s birthday parties and Derek is a shy single dad baker who can’t stop seeing Stiles everywhere. There are also dead bodies popping up every other day, but Stiles really doesn’t need to know about that, so naturally, Stiles pops up at the crime scenes too. Fantastic. ***Alright. I just stumbled across this author and I’m head over heels. I spent a few days reading everything and bookmarking most of it. And the fact that they’re primarily rated G and T and I got sucked in even without the Explicit (which rarely happens) ought to tell you something about how lovely these stories are.

The foul rag and bone shop of the heart by WritersAreLiars A Steter: entirely delightful and unique… author creates a fantastic world and Stiles’ blithe disregard for traditions works very well with Peter’s scheming. Worth reading even if it’s never finished… but it probably will be, since the last post was current. WIP.

I was also cruising “buried alive” (which finds more than the tag #buried alive, fyi) and found tons of awesome stories, although most of them weren’t Teen Wolf. So if you’re into that,

Down Where It’s Tangled and Dark by stilinskisparkles This one is a riot, (stilinskisparkles always makes me happy). Stiles simply canNOT shut up, and Derek, well, he has a Stiles thing, so it’s okay, really. Cute and funny, which is weird, since it’s about being buried alive, heh.

The Price of Gold (Buried Alive) by paranoid_fridge The Hobbit. This one is epic, and really wonderful. Boy, did Thorin fuck up, and wow, is Bilbo paying a steep price. It’s pretty gut-wrenching, but there’s a happy ending.  Bagginshield.

These Breaths We Breathe by kayura_sanada Merlin. An unexpected gem! Inspired by absolutely gorgeous (and soul-wrecking) art, the author gathers steam and proceeds with a multi-part epic that begins with Merlin’s magic being discovered and himself walled living in a tomb; to placing himself in a death-like suspended animation to protect himself while Arthur must find a way to heal him; to, finally, being exiled from the kingdom while Arthur attempts to straighten it all out. Uther is a deliciously unrepentant monster, which is quite satisfying, and there’s lots of angst, pining, h/c, whump and a bit of sex here and there.  Merthur.

#fic recs #sterek fic rec #bagginshield fic rec #merthur fic rec #buried alive #prison au fic rec #Anonymous

[endernadra]

tagged by @smo1cactus​! ayy

Rules:

1. Post the rules 2. Answer the questions given to you by the tagger 3. Write 11 questions of your own 4. And tag 11 people

1. Favorite youtuber/kind of videos on YouTube? definitely shane dawson. girl yes. he’s absolutely hilarious. love him. favorite type... honestly, probably speedpaints.

2. Favorite perfume? nah

3.Country in Latin America you would like to visit? probably brazil, or mexico.

4. Weird thing you like to eat and everyone judges you about it? i actually really like uncooked pasta. i know, i know. shhh

5. Without limits and effort, how would you like to change or put into your room? change my wall colour from green to grey, actually have a door on my closet, a bookshelf (a big one), more posters, i don’t have windows since my room is in the basement, and definitely more than two outlets, that is not enough. i need at least four.

6. Your favorite memory with family (or friends, or s/o)? i was sitting on my mom’s bed at night, and i was begging her to sing the song in hungarian, and finally she gave in, and i would try my best to sing along (the song is könnyű álmot hozzon az éj by charlie).

7. That thing in your room that you keep wondering what’s still doing there or why you have it? a bunch of plastic bags, like from hot topic, coles, !ndigo, all that shit. i really need to throw that shit out.

8. Your most ridiculous fear (at any time of your life)? well, shit, i have a fuck ton of those. but i guess i have a fear of my finger or toenails being ripped off. anytime i hear about that, i cringe so fucking hard.

9. Favorite piece (or three pieces) of merchandise you own? my sweater, my duvet, and my laptop (i have another, so i’m adding this here, and that is my hair pin).

10. Habits of other people you can’t stand? chewing with you mouth open.

11. That OTP of OTP’s, above any in all your fandoms? oh, jesus. i have so many, fuck me. either bagginshield, spideypool, or boombox. shit man.

smo1cactus’ questions:

1. Which fandom are you the most active in? probably the rise of the guardians fandom.

2. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would choose? i definitely would go an live in hungary.

3. What’s your ideal vacation like? i mean, going to the harry potter amusement park in orlando or somewhere would be pretty cool.

4. Explain your url/blog title. don’t completely understand this question, so sorry if i get this wrong. my username/url is ender nadra put together. ender is a name that means ‘extremely rare’, and nadra means ‘special’. it’s my username because it makes me feel better about myself. yay. blog title.. i think that’s the thing under your icon, right? if it is, the reason why mine says ‘send help’ is because, girl please, send it. i need it.

5. What food do you never get tired of eating? probably ice cream.

6. What would you do if you could stop time for a day? Go and steal a bunch of mone- nah, i’m just kidding, i wouldn’t do that. maybe idk, probably something stupid.

7. Do you get along with your siblings? i try to, but being the eldest i kinda have to be mean and horrible. jeez.

8. Have you ever been on a boat? nah, and i don’t plan on doing so. ever. water is literally one of my worst fears. if i can’t touch or see the bottom, i’m out.

9. What’s the biggest injury you’ve gotten? well, i’m not exactly clumsy, but i’m not graceful either, so it’s a miracle that i haven’t broken a bone or something. but when i was really young, i had to go to hospital for breathing problems. i could have died. and there was actually a little girl my age with the same problems in the same hospital sadly died that same night.

10. What website was your first account on? i think it was youtube. or for like playstation or nes.

11. What do you dream about? nothing good, girl. nothing good.

My Questions!

1. How many books do you own?

2. Favourite song?

3. Favourite book?

4. Sign? Aries, Taurus, etc.

5. How long have you been in fandom?

6. Do you have any pets?

7. If you could spend $1000, what would you buy?

8. Are you into makeup/hair?

9. Can you play any instruments? if not, what intrusment would you like to learn?

10. Do you write fanfiction, or make fanart?

11. Can you speak another language?

as for tags...

@iamtheepicemily @zothehomo (babashook lol) yeah i ain’t doin’ any more i’m sorry

#i'm horrible #so so so so sorry #i hate bothering y'all #don't hate me

[shockcity]

Bagginshield #14 - in a fairytale

Rating: M Summary: for the 30 Day OTP Challenge. Detective Inspector Durin has been trying to put Smaug behind bars for years, but something almost…supernatural keeps getting in the way. Bilbo Baggins has been running since he was a kid, but no matter where he goes he can’t escape his curse. Maybe they can help each other. Alternate Universe - Modern Setting/Magical Realism. Part I

Also on ao3

Note: So this is one of those urban magical realism fics. Bilbo is a magical busker and Thorin is a hard boiled detective who’s gonna find out magic is real and then try to arrest it!!!! Amazing!!

There’s elements of Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, King Arthur, Rumpelstiltskin (and like so many more, holy shit) in this story. It’s basically an extravaganza of fairytale tropes. It was also really fun to write my dudes, so I hope it’s fun to read! ♡

A nervous sweat ran down the side of his face as he watched Smaug idly tap his fingers on the metal table. He wasn’t even listening to their questions, and he certainly wasn’t falling for Ori’s innocent act or Dwalin’s (usually effective) bad cop routine. All the bastard did was give the two detectives a slimy smirk, and remain stubbornly and infuriatingly silent.

“…fact that you were found in the back of the club, Mr. Smaug, and no one can say where you were at the time of the murder…” Ori was saying, keeping his voice carefully neutral.

The door to the interrogation room burst open.

“My client has nothing to say to you,” Thranduil announced, looking as haughty as ever. “And seeing as you’re not charging him with anything, I think we’ll be leaving now.”

Thorin cursed viciously. “Thorin!” Balin called out, but he was already tearing out of the surveillance room and barging through the door.

“You want to explain the blood we found all over him when we brought him in, Oropher?” he growled, ignoring Dwalin’s warning glance. “Or how about the fucking head we found in the car boot – ”

“Which you found without my client’s permission to search!” Thranduil snapped.

“And really, Thorin, it’s time to let the severed head go,” Smaug said, looking from his lawyer to Thorin, and then leaning back and crossing one leg over the other – like he owned the place. “I haven’t the faintest idea how it got there, nor whom it belonged to. Perhaps I never will…one of life’s mysteries, I suppose.”

Smaug was laughing at him, and Thorin was having to count to ten in his head. Calm, he thought, remain calm.  

Thranduil scoffed. “What’s not a mystery is the gross injustice the Met continues to inflict upon my client. In fact, we’ve decided to file a harassment suit – ”

“Now, Mr. Oropher,” Balin objected, standing behind Thorin with a grim expression on his face. “We’re just trying to do our jobs. Someone has died – ”

“I can’t see how it concerns me,” Smaug said flippantly. “I can’t be blamed for every murder that comes across your desk, Chief Inspector, which is something your Detective doesn’t seem to understand. But then again, loss makes us do the craziest things….”

Fuck it.

Thorin threw himself at Smaug and in one fell swoop he ruined their investigation, gave Thranduil ample evidence for his lawsuit, and demoted himself back to sergeant. Balin later said he was lucky he wasn’t fired.

“Take this time to reconsider things,” Balin told him. His old friend may have given him a cup of tea and a sympathetic shoulder, but he was still Thorin’s boss, and Thorin’s behavior had been a problem for a while now. “Work the beat for a couple of months. Try and remember why you wanted to be a cop in the first place.”

Thorin licked his lips, gazing down at his now cold tea. “I know why,” he said, after a moment of silence.

He looked up and met Balin’s eyes. “I wanted to get scum like Smaug off the streets. And I can’t. I can’t, Balin. Something is wrong here. There’s evidence just disappearing…no one ever sees anything…and let’s not forget that his fingerprints were on the murder weapon! He killed one of our own for god’s sake!”

“Thorin….”

“He killed my father.” He was breathing hard; desperately trying to hold back the angry tears collecting at the corner of his eyes. “He killed him. And no one will help me prove it.”

“Roads go ever ever on, over rock and under tree, by caves where never sun has shone, by streams that never find the sea…." 

He plucked the often played melody and sang the next verse with a passion. This was his favorite song, after all, and his very last one of the day. He’d made nearly fifteen pound off it once.

"Over snow by winter sown, and through the merry flowers of June, over grass and over stone, and under mountains in the moon….”

Bilbo glanced up at the crowd as he sang, checking for yawns or frowns, but all he saw was smiling tourists and a few rambunctious children running about. It was a cold day in Trafalgar Square, and it looked as though it was about to get even colder and wetter. He watched the dark clouds swirl ominously for a moment, before he turned his gaze back to his audience. It was then that he saw the eyes.

Stunned, he messed up the next chord and quickly forgot his lyrics. He gaped for a moment, fear rising and threatening to paralyze him, but somehow he managed to press on – this time with more urgency.

“Under cloud and under star, yet feet that wandering have gone, turn at last to home afar.”

Obediently, one by one, the crowd began to leave. They floated away as if in a dream; forgetting the music, and forgetting Bilbo.

All but one.

“Eyes that fire and sword have seen, and horror in the halls of stone,” he sang desperately. “Look at last on meadows green, and trees and hills they long have known.” 1

Everyone was looking away now, paying Bilbo no mind as the music focused their attention elsewhere. But still those eyes were watching, and he nearly tripped over the last verse as he hurriedly added:

Think you’ll find me no you won’t! Now you see me, now you don’t.

And then he disappeared.

The huntsman looked around for him frantically, pushing through the oblivious crowd, but Bilbo had already gathered up his guitar and money-filled cap and was sprinting out of the square. The nearest tube station was Charing Cross, and he would make it if he ran like the dickens, but when he looked back he saw that the huntsman had caught on and was heading in Bilbo’s direction with frankly supernatural speed.

Goblin.

Bilbo panted as he reached the stairwell and hopped down the steps two at a time. He heard a sudden shout as his pursuer violently shoved bystanders out of the way, but he didn’t dare stop to help. He crashed into the ticket gates and hurriedly reached into his pocket for his Oyster card. Then he realized what he was doing and jumped over it, cursing himself all the while.

Down the tunnel he ran, breathing hard and then gasping with relief when he saw the crowds waiting for the train. He slipped in among them, glancing at the clock and then behind him. He saw the huntsman walking slowly down the platform, peering at people closely. Bilbo tried to catch his breath, staying quiet and still between a man in a suit and an old woman holding her shopping. He kept his head down.

Then a whisper:

So sworn does the oathkeeper, forever pursue the oathbreaker. Show me. 2

Bilbo gasped as his spell broke and the man beside him startled at his sudden appearance. Now visible, the huntsman had no problem spotting him, and he lunged for Bilbo without concern for the people around him. The old woman fell to the ground as Bilbo was tackled, the momentum pushing them both toward the edge of the platform.

“Oi! Break it up, there!”

Bilbo scrabbled at his attacker’s clawing hands, trying to buck the man off of him. He straddled Bilbo and lifted his head up by his clothes, before slamming Bilbo’s skull into the ground forcefully. His vision blurred for a moment.

“Hey, stop!” someone yelled, moving to grab at the huntsman, but he paid the hands no mind and instead drew his fist back for a punch. Bilbo’s eyes widened. He knew that that punch could kill him. If the goblin used his full strength….

No, he thought, gathering his power. He squeezed his eyes shut and quickly murmured,

Goodbye, goodbye I’ve had enough, Shifting, lifting, off and up!

The huntsman flew straight up into the air, hovered for a moment – and then dropped like a stone. Bilbo rolled away and the man hit the edge of the platform, before flipping onto the tracks with sickening crunch. Then Bilbo heard the train.

He pulled back from the edge just in time, saving himself from decapitation, and gazed in shock at where the huntsman had once been. For a moment he heard nothing, saw nothing – the shock was too great. Then he was suddenly forced onto his belly, and the world abruptly came back into focus.

People were screaming, some were pointing accusingly at Bilbo. “He pushed him! I saw it!”

The one time I wish they’d seen, he groaned internally, but he didn’t have time to sulk. Someone was digging their knee into his back and twisting his arms behind him. Ah. He was being arrested. Bother, Bilbo thought, and sighed as he was dragged away.

“Name?”

“….Underhill. Bill Underhill.”

“Okay, Mr. Underhill,” said Thorin, not believing him for a second. “Date of birth?”

“September 22nd, 1989.”

“Right,” he muttered, bored of this already. “Address?”

The man said nothing. Thorin raised his eyebrows pointedly.

“Well,” he mumbled, fidgeting. “I haven’t…got one.”

Thorin took him in properly then, for a moment setting aside the ‘suspected murderer’ part of his first impression. The man looked a bit ragged, true, though he was loads cleaner than the other drifters Thorin had met on the beat.

His hair was full of riotous auburn curls, which were covered by a maroon knit cap that had seen better days. His mustard yellow cardigan and white shirt seemed clean enough, but his blue jeans and boots were rather well-worn. He was short and a little bit plumper than most homeless people, and his dark blue eyes were bright and clear (so no drugs then).

His little nose was turned up, and he bit at his chapped lips nervously while Thorin rudely stared. He was quite lovely, really…which sort of just made the incident even more suspicious.

“You don’t look hard up,” he pointed out, gazing into Bilbo’s eyes and giving him the 'I will find out what you’ve done eventually, so make it easier on yourself and start talking’ look.

“Well, um, I’m more of an…adventurer, of sorts.”

Thorin made face. “You what?”

The man struggled to find words for what he meant, and Thorin checked his eyes again but really didn’t think there was drugs involved. Strange.

“What I mean is, I’m a bit like a nomad. I, um, don’t like being in one place for too long.” He shrugged one shoulder and smiled nervously.

“Right.” Thorin rolled his eyes.

Sensing his disdain (smart lad), he raised his chin defensively.

“Not all who wander are lost,” he said.

Thorin scowled. “What are you some modern day hippie?”

“What? No…” he muttered, frowning. “It’s meant to be philosophical.”

Thorin gave him a look and shook his head, before doggedly moving on. The station bustled around him, and occasionally the man would rattle his cuffs as he answered Thorin’s questions (though for all his chattiness he never said much of anything). Thorin finally finished the standard paperwork and focused all of his attention on Bilbo with a sigh.

“Right. What was all that, then?”

The man blinked. “You mean…at the station?”

Thorin didn’t have to say anything, his expression was answer enough.

“Oh, ok, that’s a yes then,” he mumbled, picking at his cardigan. Then he took a breath. “What happened was…I was waiting for the train, and, um, this man, he, um – for some reason he thought, well, uh, I don’t know what he thought. But he attacked me! It was like he just went mad. Um. I didn’t push him in front of the train, I swear! He just sort of…fell…that…way? Um.”

Everything in him said that this man was not a murderer. He wasn’t sure what exactly the man was, but a killer? He’d be very surprised.

Thorin was tired of this case already. He wished he had been looking when the victim had been pushed; wished he’d witnessed the murder (or possible accident) so that talking extensively with this woeful creature wouldn’t be necessary.

“I’ve got four witnesses that say you pushed him.”

“I didn’t!” the man denied loudly. “Please, you’ve got to believe me! I didn’t push him. He just fell over the side. It must have been some sort of freak accident.”

Thorin stared at him a moment more and then set his report aside. He scrubbed a hand over his face. 

“Alright,” he said, getting to his feet and taking the man with him. "Let’s go.”

“Can I leave then?” the man asked hopefully.

Instead of answering Thorin took him over to the custody sergeant. “Aww, who’s this then?” said Bofur, smiling at their detainee.

“One for the suite, Bof.”

He followed Bofur into custody as Mr. Underhill suddenly seemed to realize he was in loads of trouble.

“Oh, but I can’t stay!” he protested, as if they’d asked him to stay for dinner. “Please! I have to leave!”

Bofur tsked. “Sorry, mate,” he said as he lead him into the cell. He slid it shut and glanced at Thorin. “What’s he in for?”

Thorin rubbed his temples. “Murder.”

“I didn’t kill anyone! Okay, well…not really,” the man denied, distractedly following Bofur’s directions to put his hands out to be uncuffed. “But you don’t understand! I can’t stay here! They’ll find me. They’ll find me and kill me and then they’ll kill you too. Please, you have to let me out!”

“Cute but bonkers,” Bofur said, shaking his head mournfully. He and Thorin made their way out of custody and left the cell behind.

“Please come back! I can’t stay here! Please!” the man begged, but soon there was no one there to hear him.

Thorin rolled his neck, using one hand to massage his aching shoulders. It was just past eleven, and he and a few unlucky newbies were the only people on duty. He blew out a long breath and looked down at his paperwork despondently.

“Work the beat, he says,” Thorin muttered under his breath, reluctantly taking up his pen again. “Remember your past, blah blah blah….”

There was a sudden loud crash.

Thorin’s head popped up, and he looked around for the source of the noise. Nothing. And nobody had reacted to the sound at all. He couldn’t be that tired, could he?

Thump.

No, that was definitely real. He got to his feet. “Ori,” he said. “You hear that?”

Ori didn’t even look away from his computer. “Yeah, sorry,” he mumbled. “That chinese I had for lunch was a bit suspect.”

“No, I meant – ”

Bang! Thwap!

“That!” Thorin shouted. He pointed in the direction it came from. “You take the front! I’ll check the back.”

He grabbed his seldom used gun and ran off before Ori could respond, creeping down the hallway and listening intently. Thorin stopped when he saw a pile of broken glass, and looked up to where the small, barred window pane had shattered, letting in the rainwater. Bewildered, Thorin moved into the next hall, gun first, eyes swinging from side to side. That’s when he noticed it; the door that lead to the custody suites was wide open.

Clang! A roar, loud and long and completely hair-raising, echoed down the hall.

Thorin burst into the room, pointing his gun toward the noise, and saw just about the largest man he’d ever seen lurking in front of the cells.

“Christ,” he breathed, before shaking off his shock. “On your knees!” he yelled. “Hands up!”

But the large man only roared…and then charged at him. Thorin panicked, his finger somehow unable to pull the trigger, but thankfully a voice cried out before he was bowled over by the mad giant.

If you can’t be nice make like ice!

It was suddenly freezing. Thorin gasped as the giant man stopped as if put on pause, and ice – thick white chunks of it – crawled up his legs almost too fast to see.

He was frozen solid in seconds.

“Oh bother,” said a voice from inside the cell. Thorin gaped at the man in the yellow cardigan. “Of course you saw that.”

“Bit hard to miss,” he squeaked.

The man sighed. “You’d be surprised,” he said, before tapping the lock on his cell pointedly. “Bolg will have brought his pack with him. We need to go.”

Thorin blinked, looking from the frozen man to his prisoner, who was calmly peering out at him from behind the bars.

“You’re mental,” he decided, and then wondered if he was mental too. Everyone. Everyone was mental.

The man sighed again. “I’m terribly sorry,” he said to Thorin. “I hate breaking the law normally, but needs must.”

Inside outside woe is me I’ve done no wrong now set me free!

“Pardon?” Thorin asked, but was shocked into silence when the bars to the cell slid open. The man stepped out and hurriedly made his way over, and Thorin didn’t even think to point his gun at him he was so flummoxed.

The man peered up at him for a second, a bit concerned. “Are you alright?” he inquired, but when Thorin said nothing he huffed and shook his head. “Never mind. Of course you’re not. We need to go. Do you know where my guitar is?”

“I….y-yes?” he stuttered.

He grabbed Thorin’s hand and moved quickly out of the holding cell. “Where to, then?” he asked.

But Thorin had regained his senses. Once he was away from the giant frozen man things seemed much clearer. Go figure.

“Wait, no,” he said, waving a hand sternly. “We’re not going anywhere. You – you are going to tell me what is happening. Like what – what…that was, and how…how.”

“We haven’t the time!” the man insisted. “We have to go – ”

Crash! Thud! Another roar, but this time when one ended, another began. There were multiple attackers now.

“Ok, we really have to go,” the man groaned. He grabbed Thorin’s arm in a surprisingly strong grip and tugged him down the hall. “First my guitar, though!”

Thorin muttered a few refusals at first but obediently stopped them when they passed booking. At the man’s prodding he swung the door open, and there the guitar sat beside Bofur’s empty desk chair, unharmed.

The man snatched it up as growls (growls!) echoed through the station, rumbling like thunder and causing all of Thorin’s hairs to stand up. They hurried out of the room and down the hall, making their way to the exit. They had to cross the bullpen to get out, and Thorin couldn’t help but pause as he saw an oblivious Ori still toiling away at his desk.

“What is he – ?”

“No time!”

He heard the growl again and saw a figure standing across the room, its eyes glowing red and fixed upon them. Ori didn’t even look up.

“Why can’t he see – ?”

“Go! Now!”

The man lunged toward them, crashing into one of the desks as they raced out of the doors and into the soaked street, taking off at full speed in no direction in particular. As they ran, Thorin saw his companion click open his guitar case and fumble with the straps on his instrument.  

“Are you mad?!” Thorin shouted, but there was no time for explanations. The man in the yellow cardigan grabbed his hand and lead him to an empty side street before stopping entirely.

“This is not good,” Thorin found himself babbling. “Strategically, this is complete bollocks. Oh god, what are you doing now?!”

The man dropped his guitar case onto the ground, fixing the instrument around his shoulders. He held a pick in his teeth as he adjusted his cap, then took it out of his mouth and started to play.

It was then that the growls caught up with them. Thorin gaped as three hulking figures skulked down the alleyway, sounding absurdly enough like a pack of wolves. His heart beat out of control as they prowled closer, and then it nearly beat out of his chest entirely as he caught a glimpse of their faces under the streetlight. They were growing…fur?

“Wh–what, why…dogs?”

The man shook his head grimly. “Wargs,” he corrected, as if that made any sense at all. “Get behind me.”

Thorin blindly obeyed. He had no clue what was happening. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to know.

The music got a bit louder, and the intricate fingering began to slow. Then suddenly, the man took a breath and started to sing:

“Down the swift dark stream you go Back to lands you once did know! Leave the halls and caverns deep, Leave the northern mountains steep, Where the forest wide and dim Stoops in shadow grey and grim!" 

Thorin watched as the three men halted slowly, as if frightened of coming closer.

"Float beyond the world of trees Out into the whispering breeze, Past the rushes, past the reeds, Past the marsh’s waving weeds, Through the mist that riseth white Up from mere and pool at night!”

There was something strange happening, something…unnatural. Thorin looked down at the surface drains, gaping when he saw the water bubbling up far too quickly. The big men seemed to notice it too, and they growled and began to sprint forward. Thorin raised his gun.

“Down the swift dark stream you go!”

The water now spilled out at an impossible rate – rushing around his feet. It was moving by some invisible hand away from Thorin and toward their attackers in a roaring black wave. The music suddenly peaked, and the man in the yellow cardigan shouted rather than sang:

“Back to lands you once did know!” 3

The sky thundered as the wall of water loomed above them. It came from nowhere, everywhere, somewhere – and crashed into the pack of men. For a moment Thorin could see nothing, but as the flood gradually dissipated, Thorin stared open mouthed at where their attackers used to be.

“How…?” he whispered, unable to form a coherent thought.

The man hummed, looking at the mouth of the alley thoughtfully. Then he turned and peered up at Thorin, seeming quite unruffled.

“Hungry?” he asked companionably.

Thorin stared.

“….you could be a spotter, but I’m honestly not so sure. There’s something odd about you. Hmm. I don’t know. I’ll have to consult someone. Are you sure you’ve never Seen before? You’re a bit old to have only just noticed us now.”

Bilbo, and this was the real name of the man in the yellow cardigan, smiled at him in what he probably thought was a comforting manner and then licked a bit of vinegar off of his thumb.

“You should eat,” Bilbo told him. “I’m always starved after singing, especially when I’m wordsmithing, and greasy food is always the best, isn’t it?” He waved a piece of fried fish in the air. “Good for magic and hangovers.”

“Magic,” Thorin said weakly. He swallowed and looked down at his untouched food. “This can’t be real.”

Bilbo frowned at him, his eyes bright with concern. “I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news…but it’s real.”

He took a steadying breath and counted down from ten, and when he reached one he managed to look at Bilbo properly. “So, what? You’re from…Narnia? Hogwarts?”

Bilbo gave him a confused look. “I’m from Dorset,” he said.

“Right.” Another deep breath. “Right.

"Look.” Bilbo put his fish down and wiped his fingers on his napkin. “I’m not the best person to explain all of this to you. I don’t even know if I can.”

Thorin glared at him. “Can’t you try?”

Bilbo scratched his forehead. “Yeah, alright, fine…uh, I guess we’ll start with what I am, and what I think you are.”

Suddenly conscious of the people around them, even in the relative anonymity of a crowded pub, Thorin leaned across the table and whispered, “you mean I’m like you?”

Bilbo leaned back a bit. “Good lord, no,” he laughed. “And you don’t have to worry about anyone overhearing us. They can’t.”

“What do you mean?”

“If they’re normal they won’t see or hear anything out of the ordinary,” he explained with a shrug. “No one really knows why. Maybe it’s because they don’t want to see. Maybe they just can’t. Only two types of people can see magic. People like me, who are magic, and people like you, who are called spotters.”

Thorin rolled the term around in his head for a moment. “Spotters?”

“Means you can spot magic,” said Bilbo, pointing a chip at him before eating it in one bite. “Sometimes even better than magicals. Spotters are dead useful.”

“Okay. Fine. Spotter.” He shook his head a little. “And what about you?”

Bilbo grinned. “I’m a minstrel! And a good one, if you couldn’t tell.”

He thought back on the frozen man, the unlocked cell, and the wall of water. “Ha,” he said, voice a bit high. “Right.”

“It was strange, actually. My mother was an apothecary, that means she was like a herbalist, you know. She could make all sorts of medicines and treat loads of diseases. She was pretty amazing. Then there was my father, who was bloomer, and they grow plants and things and that, and it was no wonder they got married, because apothecaries and bloomers are obviously well-matched, but their offspring should have taken after either of them, but instead they got me!”

Thorin blinked, trying hard to keep up.

“I was a surprise, that’s for sure. There’s not many minstrels about, only two in England, actually. There’s more of the others though, like speakeasies – they can speak any language and talk to animals! My friend Beorn is one – and tricksters, who aren’t that bad, really. Shameless opportunists, sure, but not evil or anything.”

“What about the men that were chasing us?” he cut Bilbo off. “They looked like….”

He didn’t want to say dogs. Dogs weren’t scary like that. Dogs didn’t make him feel like dinner.

“Wolves?” Bilbo provided helpfully. “They’re called Wargs, and I suppose for normals the equivalent would be werewolves.”

“Werewolves,” he repeated numbly.

Bilbo looked sympathetic. “Yeah, sorry.” He reached for his untouched pint and glanced from his glass to Thorin’s blank face. Then he slid it over to Thorin, who took it gratefully.

Bilbo went back to his chips. “We actually call Wargs and these things called goblins 'huntsmen’, because that’s all they do – they just hunt. And everyone, magic or normal, is their prey.”

Thorin drank his beer and then blew out an angry breath. “They can’t go around murdering people!” he said through gritted teeth.

Bilbo shrugged. “No one can really control them.”

“You don’t have…I don’t know, a government? Magic police?”

Bilbo stared at him a bit uncertainly, as if thinking about how much he should say.

“Detective,” he began, eventually. “I don’t think you understand. There’s only something like three hundred of us in the UK. Even less in other places. See, I’m what they call a fourth generation, because I’m the fourth generation of magicals in a family. Our kind have only been around for a few hundred years.”

“What?” Thorin shook his head. “How is that possible? Did you all fall into a vat of radioactive chemicals or something?”

Bilbo cracked a smile. “Afraid not,” he said, and then he turned serious again. “Something happened…a long time ago, that…wiped us all out, I guess. No one knows what it was. There’s no literature about it, no recorded history – nothing. We were just gone. But then one day we all started coming back – and we’re still in the process of coming back. And while we’re still so new, I’m afraid we’ve been making things up as we go along. We honestly haven’t had time to form a government or police.”

“Yes, but surely you must have some sort of interim leader?”

Bilbo shrugged. “Nope.”

He digested that for a moment, finishing off his pint and picking at his chips a bit. He saw Bilbo eye them longingly and slid the basket over, sitting back and watching the man eat.

There was no way he could pass this all off as the ramblings of a madman. For one, Bilbo seemed intelligent and sensible, if a bit eccentric. For another, Thorin had pinched the hell out of his arm and still hadn’t woken up. This was no dream, and he had definitely seen something that looked a lot like magic.

He suddenly frowned. “The huntsmen,” he said, watching as Bilbo stiffened. “Why were they hunting you?”

The man fidgeted a bit, twisting his napkin until it broken apart. “Well, there’s this calamity – ”

“Sorry, a what?”

Bilbo made an apologetic face. “Oh, right, um, a calamity,” he repeated. “They’re like the…evil overlords of all us magicals.”

Thorin raised his eyebrows. “I thought you said you didn’t have a leader.”

“They’re not our leaders, they’re our enemies,” Bilbo scoffed, before narrowing his eyes at Thorin. “They can be mutually exclusive, you know.”

Thorin agreed with a nod, waving Bilbo on.

“So, there’s this calamity, a dragon, to be exact, who thinks I stole something from him, which I did not, but will he listen to reason? No. All I know is that he got into a row with my mum one day, and then we had to leave and basically wander around so he couldn’t find us again. And then a couple months ago I came back to England, and all of the sudden I’m being hounded, no pun intended, day and night by huntsman working for Smaug!”

Thorin froze. “What did you say?” he whispered.

Bilbo scowled. “Well I’m not going to repeat everything I just said! It was a lot – ”

“No, no…Smaug. You said Smaug.”

“Yes, the dragon. Smaug. You know him?” Bilbo leaned across the table and put his hand on Thorin’s arm. His eyes were wide and worried. “Detective, do you know him? You shouldn’t know him.”

“I shouldn’t?”

Bilbo gave a wry, humorless smile. “No one should,” he said. “Can I ask how?”

Thorin stared at this man who seemed so sincerely concerned for him. “He killed my father,” he revealed in an undertone, his chest hurting. “He killed him.”

Bilbo didn’t look skeptical, or like he thought Thorin was crazy…nor did he look surprised.

“Yes,” he murmured instead. “That I can believe.”

“I’ll get you some extra blankets,” said Thorin, moving over to the cupboard and rummaging around. He handed them off to Bilbo somewhat awkwardly, watching as the man took off his boots and cardigan, yawning widely.

He looked at Thorin with one eye, his mouth turned up. “You alright?” he inquired, something mischievous flashing in his expression.

Thorin blushed. “Yes,” he said. “I don’t…normally have guests.”

“Well, I’m not your guest, am I?” Bilbo pointed out, laying down on Thorin’s couch and snuggling into a pillow. “I’m your new partner!”

Unamused, Thorin shook his head and turned the living room light off. “I already have a partner.”

“But I’m your magical one,” Bilbo insisted, yawning again. “And we’re going to take down Smaug together.”

In the dim light of the hallway, Thorin watched from the open door as Bilbo’s eyes grew heavier and heavier, until he gently fell fast asleep.

This had to have been the strangest day of his life.

And yet….

Something like hope was stirring in his chest. It had taken a while for him to recognize the feeling for what it was, because it had simply been too long since he’d felt anything but dark despair.

He didn’t know if he believed him – this weirdo in a yellow cardigan that had turned his whole world upside down; that had ripped apart Thorin’s carefully constructed reality and had thrown him headlong into this dangerous new world.

But he wanted to, because no matter how dangerous or crazy it all seemed…Thorin had never felt better.

Bilbo was waiting for Thorin to catch up, his keen eyes watchful as they lingered at the bus stop. Thorin finished buying their coffees and they moved on, both a bit paranoid but at least for good reason.

“You’re sure this guy can help us? You sounded hesitant about him before.”

Bilbo side-eyed him as they trotted down the street. “You picked up on that?”

Thorin smirked. “Detective, remember?”

“Right.” Bilbo took a long sip of his coffee. “I’m not…hesitant, exactly,” he said. “Gandalf is an old friend of my mother’s. He actually helped us escape Smaug when I was a child, so he’s been a good friend and ally to us.” He shook his head. “I just don’t want him to be disappointed in me, is all. I only just returned to England a few months ago, and I’ve already been causing trouble.”

Thorin raised an eyebrow. “If he knows you that well then he should already be prepared for it,” he commented idly, ignoring the dirty look Bilbo sent him. “Is he like you? Is he, uh, a musician magician?”

Bilbo snorted. “Musician magician?” he mocked in good humor, before shaking his head. “No, he’s not like me. He’s…well. He’s just…uh, Gandalf.”

“Just A Gandalf?”

“No, um.” He scratched his head. “I suppose if I had to give it a name I’d say he’s a bit like a wizard.”

Thorin raised an eyebrow. “Haven’t you ever asked him?”

“Yes,” Bilbo replied, somewhat defensively. “And he told me to mind my own business and threatened to turn me into a frog.”

Thorin’s expression was a bit alarmed. “Can he do that?”

“No idea, but I wasn’t about to try asking again. I mean who just goes around kissing frogs? Not someone I’d want to marry….”

Though Bilbo’s description of Gandalf the (supposed) wizard left much to be desired, Thorin still followed the man down High Street; trusting in Bilbo’s judge of character for reasons unknown.

Which…was honestly rather alarming, if he really thought about it. Thorin had even skived off work that morning and had hopped onto a bus to Peckham without thinking about what he was doing or just whom he was trusting. He didn’t even know Bilbo. What on earth was he doing here? Generally, even?

But there wasn’t time for an existential crisis, because they had arrived at their destination.

“Curiosities and Antiques,” he read out loud, looking up at the sign above the little shop. “The wizard lives here? You’re joking.”

“No,” Bilbo frowned, pushing the door open which set off a little bell. “Why?”

“It’s just so obvious,” he muttered. “Though at least it’s not a pub. Or a phone booth.”

His companion only rolled his eyes and waved him inside. Books and old artifacts were stacked haphazardly on the floor and sitting atop dusty shelves. Grubby furniture was piled everywhere, all gorgeously vintage, though most of it was broken. Thorin spied a collection of clocks ticking away in the corner, and a very strange looking plant that he was pretty sure was gnawing on something. Possibly gingerbread, judging by the crumbs scattered around its pot.

Bilbo marched up to the counter and looked around, moving papers and things aside. Suddenly a tiny snout emerged from underneath an ancient textbook, and Thorin startled.

“Hello, Sebastian,” Bilbo greeted the hedgehog. And…of course there was a hedgehog. Of course Bilbo was talking to it. Because why the hell not? “Is Gandalf here?”

There was a sudden crash and Bilbo and Thorin looked up at the ceiling.

“…mushrooms! Last time you ended up in a volcano!” someone was shouting.

“Now, now,” said another, calmer, voice, but the rest of what he replied was too soft to make out.

“Oh good,” Bilbo said cheerfully. He patted Sebastian on the head. “GANDALF!” he suddenly bellowed at the ceiling. “GAND–oh! Radagast!”

A very strange looking man was eyeing them from the stairwell. He looked not in the least bit sane or reliable, and Thorin really hoped this wasn’t Gandalf.

“He’ll be down in a moment,” said the man, and his head disappeared.

“Thanks, Gasty!”

Barely a minute later an old fellow in a large grey robe came clattering down the stairs, his very tall hat hitting the ceiling but somehow managing to stay on his head. He had a long silver beard, sharp blue eyes, and a big stick with some sort of stone on the end.

“What the hell,” Thorin mumbled.

“Bilbo, my boy!” Gandalf greeted, opening his arms so that Bilbo could fly into them for a hug. “It’s very good to see you. Though perhaps not under these circumstances. You’re in a spot of trouble, I see.”

Bilbo moved back, staring up at Gandalf sheepishly. “Just a bit,” he lied. “We were hoping we could hide out here for a little while. Maybe ask your advice.”

“We? Oh.” The old man peered at Thorin curiously. “Who’s this?”

“That’s Detective Inspector Durin,” Bilbo explained, waving a hand in Thorin’s direction. “He arrested me!”

“Durin, you say?”

Thorin frowned in confusion as Gandalf narrowed his eyes, his jaw working as if he were tasting the name on his tongue. “Hmm.”

Bilbo looked from Thorin to Gandalf. “He’s weird, isn’t he? I thought he was weird.”

Gandalf finally stopped examining him and smiled down at Bilbo, patting his shoulder.

“I imagine we have many things to talk about,” he said. “Come upstairs, Radagast has made tea. It might even be palatable, but who knows? Best feed it to the plants.”

They sat around a small table covered with old parchment paper, some of which seemed permanently stuck there by spilled…something. Thorin refrained from putting his hands anywhere, and instead folded them in his lap as Bilbo looked into his teacup curiously.

“Well, now,” said the old man, putting down the kettle. “What seems to be the problem?”

“Smaug,” Bilbo told him succinctly, setting his cup down with a clank. “He’s killed Thorin’s father!”

Thorin jolted, feeling strange at hearing it said aloud and with such certainty. No one had truly believed him before, and he was just now realizing that Bilbo had been the first.

Gandalf, however, looked shocked. “Thrain is dead?” he said.

And just like that, Thorin’s world was upended again. How did….?

“You knew my father?” he asked, leaning over the table to stare into Gandalf’s eyes.

The old man nodded solemnly. “I did, yes. A good man he was too.”

“How did you know him?”

Gandalf sighed a little, his expression reserved but sympathetic. “Most of our kind know of him. Or of your ancestors, I should say. Have you not heard of Durin the Deathless?”

Bilbo suddenly gasped, sitting up in his chair excitedly. “Oh!” he exclaimed, looking at Thorin. “You’re one of those Durins! That’s what I was sensing!”

He shook his head, confused. “I’m a what?”

“A Durin, or of Durin’s folk. You are a descendent of an old clan of warriors that were charged with the protection of our kind,” Gandalf explained. “Long ago a King, then called Deathless, watched over all magical peoples, while also specializing in the extermination and removal of calamities.”

“Apparently your ancestors defeated a great beast, but Durin the first died in battle,” continued Bilbo, his eyes bright. “They buried him in a secret place, hidden from all their enemies, until 'an heir so like to his Forefather that he received the name of Durin’ returned. Or at least, that’s what the legend says.” 4

“Yes, the resurrected king.” Gandalf folded his hands on the table, looking at Thorin intently. “The tale of Durin the Deathless is one of our only surviving histories, though many do not believe that it is true. Thrain sought to prove that his family’s legacy was no fairy story. The last I spoke with him, he was intent on finding the axe to serve as evidence.”

“The axe?”

“Durin’s axe,” said Bilbo. “It’s said to be lodged in stone, and only Durin’s heir can draw it out, and that the one who wields its power would then become king.”

Thorin blinked. “But that’s ridiculous.”

“Most things are,” Gandalf agreed. “But that does not mean they are not important. And this, Thorin Durin, is very important…if defeating Smaug is truly your aim.”

He sat back, mulling over Gandalf’s frankly insane tale. His father was…magical? And alright, he could accept that. But did that mean Thorin had magic? What about Dís? His little nephews? What danger would they be in, if Thorin were to pursue this?

“Smaug killed my father,” he said, thinking hard. “Why?”

“Because he’s evil,” Bilbo piped up, and then turned to Gandalf and became very serious. “He wants the axe, doesn’t he?”

Gandalf nodded. “It’s very likely. Smaug’s one desire is power; he hoards it, and will do anything to attain it. Our kind is not governed by anyone, nor have we chosen a leader. Smaug intends to take control of our people, and he’s unlikely to stop there….”

“World domination,” Bilbo extrapolated. “Very unoriginal, if you ask me.”

Thorin ran a hand down his face, a bit overwhelmed. “How can we stop him?” he asked, looking from Bilbo to Gandalf.

“You’ll have to finish what your father started,” the old man replied solemnly. “We will need to find the axe, and should you accept your birthright, you may use its power to defeat him once and for all.”

“But I don’t know where it is!” Thorin cried.

“Perhaps your father’s possessions will shed some light on the matter,” Gandalf theorized. “Do you have them still?”

Thorin calmed and nodded thoughtfully. “Yes, they’re at my family’s old house. His things haven’t been touched. We didn’t know if we were going to sell it or not….”

Gandalf smiled widely, before rising to his feet. “Splendid! Let’s go.”

“What?” Thorin frowned. “Now?”

“Of course!” The wizard grabbed up his staff and adjusted his hat. “We haven’t much time to waste, I’m afraid. Bilbo’s return to England has quite literally awoken the beast. Smaug will be looking to make his move any day now, and we must stop him before that happens.”

This all sounded very vague to Thorin, and he was smart enough to realize that the wizard was omitting quite a lot of information, but he agreed that time was running out for taking action. Something anxious and afraid was bubbling in the pit of his stomach, warning him that things were about to come to a head – and Thorin didn’t feel anywhere near ready. That would change, though, with their first step toward winning this battle, which was looking into the legacy of Thorin’s ancestors – a legacy that he’d known nothing about.

The house Thorin had grown up in was neither too big nor too small, but just right for a family of five. Thorin opened the door and let Gandalf and Bilbo in, quickly shoving a few boxes out of the way as he lead them to the kitchen.

“I don’t know where to look,” he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s a bit of a mess, and well…father wasn’t the most organized person.”

“I knew Thrain well enough. Perhaps you have an attic? Or a cellar?”

He frowned. “We have a cellar, yes, it’s over here.” He went to the door beside the refrigerator and opened it, and then quickly moved out of the way as Gandalf bustled past him and down the stairs – Bilbo trotting after him.

Rolling his eyes at their strangeness, Thorin entered the cellar and immediately sneezed. It was dark and dusty, and nobody (or so he thought) had been down there in years. He went to flick on the light but Bilbo waved a hand at him.

“No light!” he said. “Come see this.”

Thorin walked over and looked at what they were examining so intently. “It’s my grandfather’s puzzle box,” he explained. “We could never open it, or solve his stupid riddle.”

“Riddle?” Bilbo pressed curiously. “I like riddles! Go on, then.”

Thorin smiled a little at his enthusiasm. “Alright. A box without hinges, key, or lid, yet golden treasure inside is hid,” he recited.

But Bilbo looked disappointed. “But that’s an easy one,” he sulked. “It’s an egg.”

Well it wasn’t easy to me, he thought grumpily. “Maybe that’s the secret password,” he suggested.

“Egg?” said Bilbo. “No, see? It didn’t open. But I bet I could rustle something up.”

Gandalf hummed with approval and set the box down, waving for Bilbo to get on with it. Bilbo took a breath and said:

Eggs in a box, o’ riddle king. Unlock your locks quit riddling!

Nothing happened.

“But…but…!” Bilbo looked at them both, his mouth slack with shock. “My words always work!”

“Hmm,” said Gandalf, staring at the puzzle box thoughtfully. “Curious. Perhaps Thorin is the key – ”

“What could I do?” Thorin blurted, frowning at the old man. “I’m not magical! Cast a spell at it! Aren’t you a wizard?”

Bilbo turned and sliced a hand across his neck, mouthing 'bad idea!’ at him.

Gandalf narrowed his eyes at Thorin and straightened up to his full height. “I am Gandalf,” he intoned haughtily. “And Gandalf means – ”

A loud crash sounded from upstairs, and all of three of them froze.

“Expecting visitors?” asked Bilbo in an undertone.

Thorin kept his eyes on the entrance to the cellar. “Nope.”

Bilbo made a long-suffering noise in the back of his throat and swung his guitar around, pick at the ready. “Sorry about your house,” he said, ignoring the panicked look Thorin threw at him. “But needs must.”

Then he began to strum.

The night had grown cold.

“Gasty,” called Bilbo, clasping his hands together pleadingly. “Please let us in!”

The strange man, Radagast, opened the door a smidgen. “What’s all over your clothes?”

“Um.” Bilbo carefully did not look at Thorin. “A house?”

Radagast frowned suspiciously. “Where’s Gandalf?”

“On his way. Can we come in? Please please please?”

The door swung open and the bell went off, and he and Bilbo pushed their way inside. They immediately locked the door behind them.

“We’ll be safe here,” Bilbo said with a sigh.

Thorin didn’t reply, and instead focused on brushing the plaster off of his clothes. When he saw that Bilbo was about to say something to him, Thorin asked where the bathroom was and retreated before he could try and apologize for the mess they’d made of Thorin’s home (and his life, in general).

He turned the light on in the loo and closed the door, before leaning against it tiredly. He pressed his fingers to his eyes and took a deep breath.

Thorin wasn’t really mad at Bilbo, or Gandalf for that matter. His house would need repairs (a lot of repairs) of course, but they had escaped with their lives and unscathed to boot. Thorin had seen too many unlucky sods, dead or worse, in his line of work to be angry about the loss of material things. But that man….

“Durin,” growled the giant creature. He was pale and scarred, and his teeth were sharpened to little points. His clear eyes gazed down at Thorin with amusement. “After you get me what I want, I will kill you slowly.”

Thorin raised his gun.

“Like I did your father.”

He shot, and shot and shot and shot, but his chamber was soon empty and the man was still unmarked. It was like he didn’t bleed.

The next thing he knew, Bilbo was standing in front of him, shouting, and the giant man was thrown through the wall. They turned to run….

He wasn’t sure what happened after that. His head was too full of questions. Thorin had thought that Smaug had killed his father, but what if that wasn’t true? What if Thorin had another, unseen enemy? And someone just as dangerous as Smaug?

“Thorin,” Bilbo called through the door, knocking thrice. “Gandalf’s back.”

He inhaled again, deep as he could, and turned to wash his hands and face. Bilbo was waiting anxiously outside the loo when he emerged.

“Alright, let’s see what this box is about,” said Thorin, again cutting off Bilbo’s string of apologies.

“It looks like it’s supposed to twist open, but it’s jammed,” Radagast was saying. He was wiggling his finger into a little ridge on the side of the box.

“Hey, that wasn’t there before!” Bilbo exclaimed.

“Perhaps it was your egg spell,” Thorin joked, as sort of a peace offering.

Bilbo rolled his eyes and nudged Thorin in the side, but he looked pleased.

“Hmm.” Gandalf rubbed his chin as he inspected the box. “Did your grandfather give you more than one riddle?”

Thorin frowned. “No – wait, maybe…. It’s not much of one, but he used to say it often. ’Stand by the grey stone when the thrush knocks, and the setting sun with the last light of Durin’s Day will shine upon the key-hole.’ Whatever that means.”

“Hmm,” said Gandalf.

“Interesting,” Bilbo nodded.

“Ugh,” Radagast said with an eye roll. He grabbed the box and put it in the window. “Conveniently enough, it’s sunset,” he explained as if they were all exceptionally stupid.

It took a moment, but then the box began to glow.

“There!” Bilbo cried out, pointing at the hole that had suddenly appeared.

“Can we unlock it?” Thorin asked excitedly.

“We haven’t got a key!” Bilbo reminded him.

“But we do have a burglar of sorts,” Gandalf suggested, his eyes bright with amusement. They all turned to look at Bilbo.

“What? I’m not a burglar!” Bilbo protested. “I’ve never stolen a thing in my life!”

“Escape artist then,” Thorin said, dragging Bilbo over to the window. “Right. Go on. Open sesame.”

Bilbo scowled at him, but turned his attention to the box. He gazed at the key-hole thoughtfully for a moment, before saying:

Inside outside, won’t you be free? Silly box of riddles open sesame!

He sent Thorin a cheeky grin just as they all heard the lock click. Thorin reached out and lifted the lid.

“That’s…it?” said Bilbo, peering down at what was definitely a folded up map.

Thorin blinked at it before lifting it out of the box. He unfolded it carefully, for the paper was very old and delicate, and laid it out on Radagast’s messy counter.

“How strange!” Bilbo exclaimed. “None of these places exist. Gondor…Mordor? Suppose they’re ancient countries or something?”

“Or they’re just fictional,” Thorin grumbled. “This could be a bloody map of Westeros for all we know.”

Radagast tutted at them and Gandalf shoed Thorin’s hands off the map. “Your father used this map to find the ancient weapon of his ancestors. Of your ancestors.”

“But how do you know that he found it?” asked Bilbo.

“Because of this.” Gandalf held up a small white square. It was a business card. “It was also in the box. And I should say that it was not Thrain that found the axe in the end…rather Smaug did.”

The address on the card was for some warehouse in Millwall, which meant absolutely nothing to Thorin. Until he remembered.

“He owns property in Canary Wharf,” Thorin murmured. “We searched one of his warehouses once. We didn’t find anything.”

Gandalf raised his eyebrows knowingly. “That’s because you didn’t know what you were looking for,” he said.

End Part I

Go to Part II

#30 day otp challenge #bagginshield #hobbit fic #idk what happened #this is a beast #so many tropes #but it's tropetastic #i think #just a lot of fun #tongue in cheek #definitely fan service #but I'm not making art here people #the floor is lava #not real science #take a drink every time you spot a pop culture reference #or a sly tolkienism #speaking of which #britishisms inside #but no British spelling #sorry nana #my tag game is strong

[puddeneen]

fandom fic rec days, post the second

(previous post)

just hobbit stuff in this rec, i’m afraid, bar one! but i make up for it with quantity?

Heart of the Mountain by esama (post-botfa, everyone lives, gen, kiliel; drama, friendship, political) neat as heck (unfinished, but still neat as heck) aftermath-of-the-everyone-lives-outcome piece, following bilbo and the dwarves’ efforts to piece things back together post-betrayal and bloodshed and all that unpleasantness

The Winter of Discontent by Brass_Brassicas (universe alteration, bagginshield; drama, hurt/comfort, slow burn) wonderfully characterized universe alteration wherein bilbo reluctantly plays host to a pair of displaced young dwarves and ends up with far more on his plate than he knows how to handle

The Haunting of Bilbo by EinahSirro (post-botfa, canon compliant, bagginshield; supernatural, angst, drama) because you can’t go wrong with ghost!thorin, let’s be real

I’m Not Sure This is Actually a Coffee Shop by bendingsignpost (alternate universe, gen; drama, humour) aka this is not the trope you were looking for

Light in the Window by wonderwhatthisbuttondoes (post-botfa, reshirement, bagginshield; depression, grief, recovery) in which thorin outlives his nephews, and he and bilbo cope as best they can, in the aftermath

The Service by rutobuka (alternate universe, modernized middle earth, cis-swap, fem!bagginshield; sex work, drama, intimacy, porn with feelings, romance) thorin oakenshield may harbour a slight crush on the hobbit she’s paying for sex. just a small one. absolutely no pining here.

Light Words about Nothing, and Other Rare Pleasures of Life by Margo_Kim (pre-hobbit, dis-centric; humour, fluff, friendship) in which dis travels to rivendell and makes a friend

A Little Privacy by keelywolfe (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; romance, humour, pwp) wherein thorin just vants to be alone (but fat chance of that)

Never Let Me Go by alkjira (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; mutual pining, angst, humour, romance) idiots in love, basically

The Nine Lives of Bilbo Baggins by captain (theoddoodisnude) (alternate universe, bagginshield; supernatural, angst, action/adventure, horror, romance) belladonna baggins saves a fairy’s life in her youth, and that fairy grants her first-born child a boon: nine resurrections, each marked by the daisies on his chest. sadly, as far as the quest for erebor is concerned, this makes things only marginally easier

On Wing’d Beast does Fortune Fly by TheIndianWinter (universe alteration, bagginshield; fairytale elements, animal transformation, drama, romance) wherein prince thorin receives a gift from the elvenking and the gift is Not Amused

They Call Kids Like Us Vicious by Lapin (post-auj, bagginshield, filiori; drama, romance, angst) getting better acquainted at beorn’s, and then Getting Better Acquainted at beorn’s

The paradox of now or never by Astardanced77 (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; angst, mutual pining, romance) misunderstandings and some sorely-needed clarification in the aftermath of thorin’s coronation

People You’ve Been Before by Irrealia (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; angst, romance) nipping some unhappy memories in the bud through creative means, or: doing the do on the battlements. nice

Warm Up by paranoid_fridge (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; reshirement, fluff, pwp) bilbo falls into a stream while out for a stroll, and thorin takes it upon himself to warm him up

Northern Downpour by songs_of_the_moon (post-botfa, canon compliant, bagginshield; supernatural, drama, angst, romance) in which bilbo is either losing his mind, or the ghost of thorin ii oakenshield is trying (very earnestly, all credit due) to court him

Plain Gold Ring’s Got a Story to Tell by Irrealia (post-auj, bagginshield; porn with feelings, friendship, first time) alone time is hard to come by on a quest to reclaim a homeland, but then alone time can in fact be Better Together

Quest’s End by Margo_Kim (post-dos, universe alteration, bagginshield; humour, romance) this fic>>>>>>>>the entire first thirty minutes of botfa (and a great deal of the remaining minutes) honestly

Purls Beyond Measure by toastfic (pre-dos, ori-centric, pre-bagginshield; friendship, hurt/comfort, knitting) ori helps bilbo out with a problem or two in the latter half of their journey east

Raise your voice. by grimdark_cake (post-botfa, everyone lives, illustrated, bagginshield; fix-it, slice of life, drama, humour, romance) a story narrated to the tune of erebor’s slow and steady restoration

Respectability Is For The Weak by grimcognito (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; reshirement, humour, romance) ridiculous husbands being domestic (and ridiculous)

Returned by StrivingArtist (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; drama, angst, mutual pining, romance) wherein bilbo finds out the worth of his mithril corselet, and has no idea what to do with that knowledge

The Road goes ever on and on by paranoid_fridge (post-botfa, everyone lives, travelogue, bagginshield; action/adventure, romance, drama) an eventful retirement for thorin oakenshield and his consort-hobbit

Roses are red, forget-me-nots are blue by alkjira (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; angst, pining, romance) in which bilbo jumps to unfortunate conclusions while thorin is enamoured and oblivious

Slow Burn by rachel4revenge (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield, kiliori; angst, pining, romance) bilbo returns to the shire after the quest, heartsore and very much a changed hobbit. he takes up bee-keeping, adopts an orphaned relative, and does his best to settle with his unrequited feelings. and then, years later, a dwarf knocks at his door.

Smoke In the Night by authoressjean (time-travel, bagginshield; angst, grief, hope, romance) bilbo wakes up in the shire after his death, eighty years younger and none-the-wiser with regards to the whys or the hows. he is aware, however, that he may very well have to opportunity to change the outcome of the quest for erebor. but taking that chance may be the furthest thing from easy

So Crowned by baggvinshield (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; romance, humour) in a happier aftermath, bilbo and thorin begin the transition from old idiots in love to coronated old idiots in love

So Ends This Day by tirsynni (fix-it, everyone lives, bagginshield, kiliel; drama, action/adventure) because fuck ravenhill and fuck those wasted moments that might have made for a happier outcome fuck it fuCK EVERYTHIGN

The Spiders of Erebor by KaavyaWriting (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; humour, seasonal, romance) bilbo introduces his husband and cohorts to the grand old shire tradition of all hallow’s eve

Splinters and Bruises by Mithen (post-auj, bagginshield; angst, hurt/comfort) gorgeous carrock-aftermath piece wherein thorin helps patch bilbo up after their misadventures in the misty mountains

The Satyr by rutobuka & yubiwamonogatari (alternate universe, illustrated, bagginshield; drama, humour, magical realism, romance) Bilbo Baggins encounters something strange in the Old Forest - something which very well may need his help

The Subways of Men by bendingsignpost (alternate universe, modernized middle earth, bagginshield; first meetings, romance) very possibly the meet cute to end all meet cutes

Summer by alkjira (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; humour, romance) wherein bilbo makes a raspberry pie, gets drunk before midday, and feels up his husband in the middle of a field. good times for all, really

A Tactful Solution by Ias (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; humour, domesticity, romance) king thorin gets his feelings hurt, and his consort gets a laugh

Third Time’s The Charm by alkjira (post-auj, bagginshield; crack, fluff, supernatural) in which a love spell goes awry, or, well, a truth spell, or some kind of lowering-the-inhibitions spell, radagast has no idea and it wasn’t his fault anyway, he swears

Thorin Comes for Bilbo by sunryder (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; drama, angst, humour, romance) a letter arrives in erebor bearing startling news, and thorin has a decision to make

This is How it Starts by lily_winterwood (alternate universe, modernized middle earth, bagginshield; romance, drama) wherein bilbo gets to talking with a fellow passenger on his and frodo’s morning tram-ride

Though far away we’re still the same by lloydsglasses (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; asexuality, marriage of convenience, angst, friendship, drama) bilbo and thorin are wed in the aftermath of the battle of five armies, and struggle to repair their relationship alongside the demands and expectations of their union

A Thousand Miles From Comfort by perkynurples (post-auj, bagginshield; angst, humour, porn with feelings) in which bilbo is a power bottom and thorin doesn’t stand a chance, really

Through Shadow and Flame by Cinderstrato (universe alteration, bagginshield; supernatural, action/adventure, friendship, romance, angst, hurt/comfort) beautiful and brilliant universe alteration in which erebor never fell, but the arkenstone of thrain heralds trouble all the same

three words on the tip of my tongue (not to be spoken or sung, or whispered to anyone) by KaavyaWriting (post-auj, bagginshield; friendship, drama, angst, romance) wherein thorin and bilbo draw ever closer in the aftermath of their flight from the misty mountains

To the Ends of the Earth by comeswithaprice (universe alteration, time travel, bagginshield; drama, friendship, romance, angst) thorin oakenshield inherits the fabled gift of durin’s line, stumbling in and out of time at various points throughout his life and always, always coming back to one singular fixed point: a halfling named bilbo baggins

To You I Bestow by Emelye (post-botfa, thorin lives, bagginshield; friendship, pre-slash, internalized homophobia, pining) wherein the weight of a realized kingship proves too heavy for thorin to bear, and he and bilbo eventually depart for the shire together

Together by HildyJ (post-botfa, everyone lives, reshirement, bagginshield; domesticity, fluff, slice of life) naked slobs in bed aka perfection

Trauma Colours by spinnd (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; ptsd, chronic illness, recouping, angst, romance) wherein thorin takes the fight with his demons to the shire after the battle of five armies, and bilbo helps where he can

trouvaille by northerntrash (alternate universe, bagginshield; retirement, property restoration, slice of life, angst, romance) old idiots in love bickering, slaving, and reconnecting over the course of a summer spent restoring a beloved place gone to seed

In which the Dwarves are Satyrs, because Reasons by HiddenKitty (alternate universe, bagginshield, bungodonna; coming-of-age, friendship, angst, romance) pretty much does what it says on the tin, albeit gorgeously

(Un)Familiar Ground by The Feels Whale (miscellea) (time-travel, fix-it, bagginshield; drama, action/adventure, humour, angst) fav bilbo-relives-the-quest fic ever, even unfinished as it is; inventive, wonderfully characterized, and all that with minimal retreading-events-by-rote type filler! a gem

Unanticipated offerings by Astardanced77 (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; friendship, gifting, anniversaries, romance) a year to the day after the company comes knocking on bag end’s front door, bilbo is surprised with gifts from each of his friends, the last of which is not nearly the least

Uncle Bilbo Is Not Going On Your Adventure by Erisah_May (universe alteration, gen; humour, drama, shire politics) wherein gandalf makes assumptions with regards to bilbo’s willingness/availability to take on a quest that he probably shouldn’t

An Unexpected Predicament by paranoid_fridge (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; action/adventure, abduction, torture, drama, hurt/comfort) thorin and bilbo fall foul of a kidnapping plot and must do their best to outwit their captors until they can be rescued

Want by Comedia (post-auj, bagginshield; drama, first time, romance) bilbo and thorin give each other what they can, with a dragon waiting at the end of their journey and the future all uncertain

We Shall Be Monsters by Erinye (alternate universe, frankenstein fusion, bagginshield; supernatural, horror, drama) wherein doctor thorin eijkenskiadi’s dark labours finally bear fruit, one dark and stormy night, and he could never be prepared for the consequences

What was promised by paranoid_fridge (post-dos, everyone lives, bagginshield; dubious morality, gold-sickness, angst, romance, happy ending) in erebor, bilbo agrees to marry thorin after smaug’s death, despite the arkenstone still concealed in his effects and the noose of the gold-sickness tightening around them. it doesn’t make things easier

When You’re Ready by Irrealia (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; regret, ptsd, emotional hurt/comfort, romance) the uphill struggle that is thorin’s learning to live with himself in the aftermath of the battle of five armies is a steep and slow climb. he gets there eventually

where moments turn into forever by alkjira (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield, filibofur, kiliel; humour, romance) not so much a quiet reshirement, but a good one, all the same

A Willing Heart by impossiblewanderings (post-auj, bofur-centric, slight bagginshield; friendship, angst, action/adventure, hurt/comfort) wherein a pack of wargs ambush the company on the way to beorn’s, and one of their number is lost

Winterfilth by Irrealia (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; seasonal, gardening, humour, fluff) in which erebor’s climate is not ideally suited to certain hobbitish traditions, but bilbo makes do (with a little help)

Yuletide traditions by Astardanced77 (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; seasonal, reshirement, hobbit traditions, friendship, romance) intent on acquiring the perfect yule gift, thorin turns to bilbo’s relatives for aid

Yours for the Having by katajainen 8872450 (post-auj, bagginshield; romance, fluff, porn with feelings) in which bilbo and thorin share a bath in lake-town and Stuff Happens

The Time for Home by Drenagon (universe alteration, bagginshield; drama, friendship, humour, action/adventure) in dire straits, the dwarves of ered luin turn to the hobbits of the shire for aid, an undertaking which eventually bears fruit after a somewhat rocky start. in recompense, the twelve-strong envoy of dwarves agree to help their host, bilbo baggins, with a problem he claims threatens the very security of his home - only, as it turns out, the problem may yet be further reaching

The Selkie by HiddenKitty (alternate universe, cis-swap, fem!bagginshield; supernatural, romance, drama) a trapper has a strange encounter on the ice fields that turns her world upside down

Put Me In The Ground by Lapin (post-hobbit, canon compliant, bagginshield; grief, drama) with regards to the matter of bilbo baggins’ bachelorhood

A Royal Guardianship by ladyoakenshields (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; reshirement, adoption, familial relationships, drama) wherein bilbo, thorin, and frodo begin the process of becoming a family

Set Your Heart On This Far Shore by one_go_alone (alternate universe, moderized middle earth, bagginshield; mutual pining, misunderstandings, cultural differences, social media, romance) in which king thorin ii of erebor runs into someone he thought quite lost to him

Down the Road and Back Again by seashadows (alternate universe, modernized middle earth, bagginshield, noridwalin, etc; modern royalty, legal problems, humour, drama, familial relationships, romance) wherein erebor’s king enlists the aid of lawyer bilbo baggins with regards to a matter of some … delicacy

What Tradition Told You by Lapin (alternate universe, bagginshield, filiori, gigolas, kiliel; drama, angst, familial relationships, workers unions, rivalries, romance) the ups and downs of life for union leader thorin oakenshield and his cohorts

A Dwarven Companion by SailorBryant (post-botfa, everyone lives, bagginshield; cultural differences, internalized homophobia, pining, angst, romance) with the mountain reclaimed, and every member of thorin’s company safe and accounted for, you’d be forgiven for thinking bilbo’s troubles quite finished. it turns out, however, that that’s not the case - but they’re on the scale of marauding dragons or orc hordes this time around, at least

Five Blankets by mcmanatea & rutobuka (alternate universe, modernized middle earth, cis-swap, fem!bagginshield; drama, humour, romance) wherein an offensive article written by her cousin lobelia lands bilbo baggins in hot water with some of her customers

Where Have All The Flowers Gone by perkynurples (alternate universe, wartime era, bagginshield; epistolary, drama, angst, slow burn, romance) youngsters kili and fili are shipped off to the countryside on the behest of their uncle, a lieutenant colonel very much preoccupied with his nephews’ safety in the wake of world war ii’s outbreak. as the months elapse, and over the course of letters and sparse gifts, a dialogue opens up between the soldier and the boys’ host, and both men become dearer to each other than they know

What’s Behind and What’s Before by KaavyaWriting (time travel, fix-it, universe alteration, pre-hobbit, bagginshield; angst, drama, friendship, ptsd, slow burn) wherein bilbo relives the events of the quest - or he will do, eventually, once he’s finished reliving his childhood. and his tween years. and everything else up to the point’s where he’s fully grown and quite tired of the waiting about, and sets off for ered luin to see his dearly-missed dwarves

away ere break of day by lilithiumwords (universe alteration, canon divergence, bagginshield; action/adventure, drama, angst, what-if) thorin and bilbo are captured on ravenhill and must fight together for their lives and their freedom, and then for their friendship (or whatever else might once have been between them)

13 Dwarfs And A Hobbit Walk Into A Bar by alkjira (canon divergence, 5 + 1 things, everyone lives, bagginshield; drinking, friendship, humour, fluff) bilbo baggins, in and out of his cups at various points throughout the quest for erebor

+

aaand for anyone else who’s still laughing, post-s4 and its various inanities:

same as it ever was by theonlytwin (sherlock, au post-s2; john watson/sebastian moran-as-played-by-richard-armitage, like-specifically-by-richard-armitage) i recc this constantly and i’m probably never gonna stop. but with good reason! shhh just trust me, you’ll see

#ficrecdays #fic rec #the hobbit #sherlock #bagginshield #mostly bagginshield anyway (there's some gen) #johnbastian #that's also a thing here #altho yr absolutely free to interpret it as reincarnate!bagginshield (i have and will)