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malusokay · 1 year

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Glow-up tips that actually work from your favourite beauty girly (me)

Hot girls don't gatekeep, so here are some of my favourite glow-up tips that actually work. <3

Skin

Find a skincare routine that works for you!! It took me years to find mine, but now my skin is literally perfect. <3 (let me know if you guys want a detailed skincare routine!!)

Don't pick your skin, the less you touch your face, the better.

I believe ice rollers are bs…

If you struggle with dark circles, don't try fixing them through skincare. Most likely, the problem comes from your diet or stress.

Dry brushing is a game-changer!!

Use lotion after every shower and apply a body spray before the lotion is fully absorbed into your skin. You'll smell amazing for DAYS.

Don't try homemade skincare if you already struggle with your skin. I learned it the hard way, lol…

WASH YOUR MAKEUP BRUSHES

Hair

The more heat you use, the more damage you'll have.

SILK PILLOWCASES

Never sleep with wet or damp hair.

Stop buying cheap shampoo and conditioner, also make sure to check the ingredients!!

Some ingredients to avoid: Sulfates, Parabens, Polyethene Glycols, Triclosan, Formaldehyde, Synthetic Fragrances and Colors, Dimethicone, Retinyl Palmitate.

I trim my hair every 3 months.

If you have damaged hair, invest in some Olaplex!! my favourites are N4c, N6 and N7. <3

Diet

green juice actually makes you feel better. I make mine at home and LOVE it :)

Balance is key!! I swear by the 80/20 rule.

Drink more water, even if you think you're drinking enough. DRINK MORE

Keto is BS <3

Focus on eating more protein. Usually, low-fat products have more protein, so I just try to buy those, lol.

I eat gluten-free, not by choice… But it did clear my acne, so…

Take supplements, get a blood test done, discuss it with a doctor and start taking whatever they recommend. GAME CHANGER.

EAT MORE VEGETABLES and fruits.

Lifestyle

Focus on being more active, walk more, workout, join a club or sport, dance, whatever works for you!!

I aim for 10K steps, I live in a big city, so I usually walk more than that but still.

Hobbies that don't include screen time. Trust me.

Find your personal style and ALWAYS dress up. <3

TREAT YOURSELF. Buy yourself flowers, and presents, go to your favourite restaurants, vacations!!

Read more. As a classics lover, I can't imagine a life without literature, but even if you don't like classics, any book is better than no book!!

Take more pictures. I've noticed that I have become a lot more present since I've started taking more pictures!! highly recommend :)

I hate to say this, but getting up earlier is lowkey kinda great... been doing it for a few weeks, and unfortunately, I do feel better... they were right...

Get a cat. :)

Mindset

Stop assuming that everyone hates you, they don't, trust me.

Journaling, manifesting, law of attraction, affirmations.

one of my favourite affirmations: "if I weren't capable, the opportunity wouldn't have come my way; I belong here." <3

Stop hanging out with people who drain your energy

stop consuming media that makes you feel bad.

What would the highest version of yourself do?

If you change your mindset, you will change your life.

Romanticise every aspect of your life. <3

As always, please feel free to share your own suggestions and glow-up tips in the comments! <3

✩‧₊*:・love ya ･:*₊‧✩

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etheries1015 · 4 months

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I had sort of a crack idea of what would the non-human twst boys do if their crush or s/o was allergic to them? Savanaclaw and Octonivelle with like the fur allergy and seafood allergy. Maybe diasomnia’s s/o has some sort of fairy allergy? Sorry if this is too silly for you to write, it’s alright if you don’t 😭

I LOVE THIS BECAUSE I'VE HAD A SIMILAR THOUGHT i'm allergic to cats and i'm like...man what am I gonna do around Grim BUAHAHA...this is a great idea. Nothing is too silly to write my friend!

Non-human Twst boys reacting to a S/O who is allergic to them!

featuring: Savanaclaw and Octavinelle!

general warnings: gender neutral reader, not really proof read \

TW: None! just fluff. and allergies.

Leona

The first time you sneezed around him, they didn't know it was literally BECAUSE of him. This was until you two took a nap together for the first time, and when you woke up he saw your face...Oh, brother. Your eyes were puffy and red, congested, and your nose leaked like nobody's business. He genuinely felt bad about this, but wouldn't let you in on his true feelings/emotions. Without understanding the cause (though he had an inkling) he immediately took you to the doctor.

"They're allergic to me? What kind of shitty nonsense is that?!"

Leona invested in the most expensive of healthcare for you. Allergy pills and whatnot, because he wasn't about to sacrifice his lovely naps with his significant other. No amount of allergy is gonna stop him from getting what he wants, and that is your affection.

Ruggie

"Sooo...basically you're saying you're allergic to me? Cause' im part heyena?"

"It's a little more complicated than that. It's more like...animal dander? I guess?" You didn't seem to certain in your answer either, it was more or less a guess since...well, there wasn't half beast half human where you are from. You can only make an educated guess on why you're so allergic to him based off of the information you had back at home.

Ruggie is honestly so sad about this. He can't afford to get you any treatments or medical help with this, so you two just have to be careful. He does manage to get his hands on some special washing products (probably legally) and takes extra care of what he eats, and how clean he his. He's consistently brushing his hair and cleaning his ears.

"Man i'm such a simp. What's wrong with me?!" ...He isn't used to bending backward for people. But seeing you so sick around him, hurt him even more than his pride, so he of course would do anything to make sure you're as comfortable around him as possible. Ahh...the power of love <3

Jack

He gives me the "I must stay away from you for your own good," Type. Although this doesn't last very long. Jack is incredibly loyal, and he's far too attached to let you go. There's times where he would try and keep a distance (much to your annoyance), but when you began sneezing and itching your eyes you knew he was somewhere nearby. Jack is protective like that, but it pains his heart to see you so sick because of something he cannot control.

He does both a mix of what Ruggie and Leona does. He took up extra part-time jobs to afford good allergy medication for you, the entire works. Pills, eye drops, nasal sprays, breathing treatments...He also invests in high-quality shampoo and conditioner to help rid of his dander and hopefully reduce the amount of shedding he has.

With the amount of hair Jack has, he is CONSTANTLY brushing it and it is CONSTANTLY shedding. He does EVERYTHING under the sun to control this, all for you. Although... this is a partnership! You told him that a relationship goes two ways. You love him regardless of how itchy you may get, and you equally chip in to problem-solve.

You're both loyal to each other until the very end, no matter what trivial matters may get in your way <3

Azul

He knew before you two started dating that you had a severe allergy to seafood, so he made it a point to avoid you. But...that didn't stop YOU from coming to HIM. It was one of the things that drew him towards you, the way even though you were gaining a rash you would still wrap your arms around the back of him. Although it wasn't as bad in his human form, he was always terrified what would happen if he were to unleash his original form.

But worry not! We are talking about the literal king of potionology. He finds a remedy very quickly, and you trust him...a little too fast. He is astonished when he says;

"Take this...the second you drink this your allergies will be something of the past. But be warned-" You grabbed it out of his hand and chugged it. He stared at you with his jaw slacked open, his face turning a deep shade of hot red when you throw yourself onto Azul and place a big fat kiss against his cheek.

He imploded. But hey! his potion worked! He tried to get you to give him some sort of paypack, but you mentioned that your form of payment was in that kiss.

He now demands kisses every time he makes the potion for you <3 It's kind of a silent agreement. He just stares at you after you're done drinking it, and whenever you feign ignorance the point upon his lips is far too obvious.

Jade

The first time you broke out in hives, he remained completely calm. Jade is rather smart, and he understands your allergy must be because of his disposition as a mer-folk. Although in human form, he couldn't help but notice the way you would hide your rashes either behind makeup or by bulking clothing. He was amused by this for a moment, but when he saw it worsen he couldn't help but become worried.

"Why would you go so far for me? what do you gain by allowing yourself to become sick?" When you replied with a blush that you simply liked Jade, thus his shock soon turned into action. He excused himself for a few days to climb mountains and collect the most effective of flowers and medicinal remedies for allergies and put together a potion that you were able to take to alleviate your symptoms.

He isn't the vice house warden for nothing! His talents and magic prowess truly aided him, albeit in a way that was seemingly selfish. It was all worth it for you, though.

But he does use you as an example during a class project in potionology, having you stand up in front of the class while he compares your allergies before and after taking the potion.

He got a 100% in the project. And a Significant other. A win-win for everyone!

Floyd

Floyd is much smarter than he lets on. The moment he hugs you from behind and touches your arm, he notices the rash right away. He eyed it with a frown, and without saying anything he let go of you much to your dismay, leaving you to your lonesome for a few days on end.

You had to admit you missed Floyd, his silly jokes and way of talking, his unpredictable personality, and the attention he would often give y you. While sitting at the table during a free period, your head was propped up against your hand and a sad sigh escaping your lips.

"Ehhhh? Why is shrimpy sitting here all alone? Didya miss me?" A familiar voice teased as arms wrapped around you and something akin to a vegetable drink set in front of you. You gasped and smile up at the tall male, who wasn't wrapping his arms around you as you were used to, typically ignoring the itching of your rashes. He convinced you to drink what he sat in front of you, and although you eyed it with suspicion, you sighed and drank it in one gulp and tightly shut eyes.

Nothing happened. You turned to look over at Floyd, about to question the purpose of making you drink the (surprisingly tasty) smoothie-like liquid but were quickly interrupted by lips pressing against your own.

The kiss caught you off guard and you began to panic, talking about your allergy...before you realized that nothing was happening. No rash, no itchiness, nothing.

"Seeeee? It's a potion. I made Azul make it for me. Now I can touch you as much as I want," He smiled proudly. However he managed to convince Azul would forever be beyond you...

He forgets to give you the potion sometimes, only when you two are cuddling and a rash or itching pops up do the both of you realize it's time for a dose.

Ya'll are so silly for each other <3

#twisted wonderland #twst #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #octavinelle x reader #floyd leech #floyd leech x reader #jade leech #jade leech x reader #azul ashengrotto x reader #leona kingsholar x reader #ruggie bucchi x reader #ruggie bucchi #jack howl #jack howl x reader #twisted wonderland headcannons #twst headcannons #leona x reader

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wynnyfryd · 1 year

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Steve comes into the kitchen fresh from the shower, finds Eddie with his head in the sink, scrubbing his soaked curls over the basin.

“Uh,” Steve says.

Eddie flips upright, sending a spray of water across the backsplash. He shakes his head out like a dog. “Morning!”

“Were you just shampooing your hair in the sink?”

“Yeah.”

“…Why?”

“Water was still warm from the dishes,” he shrugs, as if that explains a damn thing. “You want coffee?”

Steve stares at him, horrified. “Eddie… for the love of God, please tell me you did not just wash your hair with dirty dish water.”

“Ew! What??”

“You just said the water was still warm from the dishes!”

“The water from the tap was still warm,” Eddie gestures emphatically at the tap in question, at the empty and sparkling stainless steel basin, “from where I scrubbed the sink clean after draining the dishwater. Jesus Christ, Harrington, what kinda man do you take me for?”

“I don’t know! The kind who washes his hair in the sink??”

Eddie cackles at that, swings himself around the kitchen island into Steve’s space, his movements free and loose with amusement.

“It was clean water, baby, honest,” he swears as he squeezes Steve’s face between his hands and peppers him with kisses until his deeply offended frown eases into an only slightly put-out pout.

Steve does his best to maintain his glare. “Did you even use conditioner?” he asks.

“It was two-in-one?” Eddie tries.

“Okay, nope! No. Absolutely not, get your ass back upstairs, Munson, we’re doing this properly.” He drags Eddie from the kitchen by his wrist, muttering angrily under his breath as he stomps up the stairs. “Two-in-one. Of all the stupid fucking…”

Later, when they’re lying sated in bed (Steve on his back with an arm under his head; Eddie sat up and purring like a cat as Steve’s blunt nails scratch down his spine), after Eddie’s hair has been combed through and set into pretty little ringlets with no less than five different products, Steve props himself up on his elbows and levels Eddie with a suspicious look. “…Was this all a ploy to get me to do your hair for you again?”

Eddie doesn’t even bother trying to hide his grin as he lets his head flop over his shoulder to look at Steve. “And also to get you to fuck me in the shower first, yeah.”

“You little shit!” Steve laughs, kicking at Eddie’s back. Eddie yelps and scrambles off the bed, safely out of attack distance.

“You still want that coffee?” he offers.

Steve chucks a pillow at his head, and Eddie dodges. “Ugh, you’re the worst.”

“Mmhm,” Eddie agrees, “But you looo-ove me.”

Steve does, is the thing. He really, really does.

#steddie #steddie fic #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie drabble #steddie fluff #my writing #this is very silly i’m sorry or you’re welcome

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dilatorywriting · 9 months

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Monster Mayhem: Love Drunk

Gender Neutral Reader x Vil Schoenheit Word Count: 1.9k

Summary: You are a succubus, who is apparently really bad at their job. At least if your poor, nitpicking victim has anything to say about it.

A/N: Sorry for being horny on main, but here we are lol I've been writing a lot of little bits lately for a Twst OC of mine, and decided that hey, y'know what, might as well revamp some of the ones that are easily revamp-able into my usual reader-insert style and pump out some shenanigans rather than just letting them languish away in google docs. So here we be.

🌶️🌶️🌶️ WARNING for Spicy Content!

READ WHAT YOU LIKE, BUT BE MINDFUL OF WHAT YOU READ

“You’re late.”

The steam billowed as if with a sigh, and a familiar figure melted from the warm spray.

You blew a wet strand of hair out of your face with a noise that was nearly a raspberry. “I was busy.”

“I didn’t realize you had a life outside me,” Vil droned, only mostly serious. The little succubus seemed to pop out of the shadows at the slightest beckon, and even when you were gone, you always came back with nothing but talk of all the ways you’d worked to improve your craft since the last they spoke. And of your strange, card-faced friends, on occasion. But that was a topic you tended to hoard closely to your chest like a dragon to gold.

“Not everything revolves around you,” you scoffed, rolling your eyes.

Vil leaned his head back to rinse the remainder of the conditioner from his hair. “Then maybe you shouldn’t act like my good opinion is the only thing keeping you employed, fed, and housed.”

You went warm in the ears, even under the heat of the steam, and crossed your arms petulantly over your chest. At least you’d been keen enough to not pop into his shower fully clothed this time. That had been a mess. You shifted back and forth on the balls of your feet with a grumpy, little huff and Vil didn’t bother to fight the way that his eyes followed the slowly rolling droplets of water that trailed lower with each fidget.

“Whatever. I’m here now, aren’t I?” you grouched. “But anyways, what’s the plan for today? Out late again?”

“More all-day shoots,” he said, reaching up to replace one bottle of custom hair product for another. “And an interview to follow that’s meant to be a pre-recording for the morning programs tomorrow. So that could be close to midnight, depending on when we finish up.”

Your nose scrunched in sympathy. “Ew. I don’t get why you do all this stuff. It sounds like a nightmare. Human media is so strange.”

Maybe it was. But—

“It’s worth it,” he huffed, running one of his newer serums through the silky strands of his pale hair. He glanced down at you from beneath his dripping bangs. “Have you been using the conditioner I gave you?”

“Do you think there are functional showers in Hell?” you snipped, and then averted your gaze in chagrin. “I have been trying. I just—it’s not always an option all the time,” you said, a bit embarrassed.

“Come here,” he sighed, twirling his finger in a sign to show him her back, and you shifted closer obediently.

It was always so funny, he thought, as he reached out to scrub white bubbles into your mused hair. That you would spit and hiss, and throw such a tantrum over everything. But when it came to actually obeying his orders? You were always putting one foot in front of the other to meet him more than halfway. If he said ‘jump,’ you’d whine and complain but inevitably ask ‘how high.’ Like a loyal little stray that growled and raised its hackles but would come preening for food and attention at the first whistle.

“Sounds like a stressful day,” you hummed, arching into his fingers like a cat being stroked down its spine. “Are you still stuck working with that one guy you hate? Nigel, or whatever?”

“Neige,” he huffed, giving your hair a soft tug in rebuke. “And yes. The project hasn’t wrapped yet.”

“So a very stressful day,” you mused, tilted your head back to thump against his chest and stare up at him through the steady stream of water overhead. He watched the thin, feline-like, pupils of your eyes flash and widen into something round and dark. “This’ll be perfect then.”

“What?” he scoffed, as if he hadn’t just seen those pulsing, black pupils himself and felt something in his stomach tug. “That I’m stressed?”

“No,” you huffed, cheeks puffing out in irritation like he’d known they would. “Because I’ve been practicing.”

He arched a pointed brow and your cheeks went rounder yet. You stepped out of his hold and turned so the two of you were chest to chest. Vil let his hands fall to rest at the dip in your back and you pressed along him in one, lean line from toe to hip. Those strange, iridescent irises of yours flicked over his face, his lips, and those rabbit cheeks went hot with embarrassment. (“Humans kiss each other,” he’d said during one of their earliest meetings, when he’d leaned in with a smirk to brush his mouth against your temple and you’d nearly started seizing. “It’s what they do.” And you’d gone rattlingly indignant and started sputtering about impropriety of all things. All while you were sitting there butt naked and demanding he let you jerk him off so you could meet your weekly quota).

Your eyes dipped low beneath your lashes. And then you darted up quick to press a peck to his chin before immediately dropping to your knees. You leaned forward to nuzzle into the soft, blonde hairs tufted there and then dragged your tongue up the length of him in one, long lick. Vil fought a shiver.

“Practicing, huh?” he droned, affecting boredom as best he was able.

“Yes,” you replied, determined, and gave another lick. Shorter, this time. And more focused along the delicate, pink crown of him. “You made fun of me last time! Called it a ‘High Schooler’s First Blowjob!’ How could I not practice?”

“Oh? With who?” he scoffed, a bit more bitter jealousy seeping into the sneer than he would have liked.

Your face went scrunchy with embarrassment again and then you were sinking back down to run your tongue against the thick vein along the underside. Vil reached out to twine his fingers in your hair and you ducked forward to take him into your mouth.

“You’re lucky you caught me before I got out of the shower,” he said on a sigh, hips twitching when you gave a firmer suck. “This would hardly be worth dirtying myself all over again for—”

You pressed her tongue sharply into the little slit at the head and then dragged the muscle forward in a wide sweep—circling the whole of the most sensitive creases and then applying that same, lovely, suction all over again. Vil groaned, low and rumbling, and he could practically taste the bubbling excitement of your pride bursting along his lips.

You hummed—smug—intentionally loud and muzzy, so that it shot through the buzzing nerves in his skin like a symphony. Vil grit his teeth and dug his fingers into your hair to yank. Instead of popping off with an indignant whine and a trailing string of saliva, you narrowed your eyes at him and then dove forward—relaxing your throat and swallowing him down until your nose was pressed into his pubic bone. Vil cursed, head falling back against the tile wall with a punched-out moan and fingers twining shakily in the short hairs by the base of your skull.

“You have been practicing,” he mumbled, fighting the urge to go a bit cross-eyed when you swallowed around him.

You hummed in affirmation. It vibrated all the way from head to base and he shivered in time with it.

After too many long, long seconds of him nearly slipping down the wall with the curl of his toes, you popped off with a cough.

“I can hold my breath for ages now,” you declared proudly, a smear of milky white smudged along the corner of your lips. You leaned forward to prop your chin up against the jut of his hip bone and smirk up at him with a look that was a touch too genuinely excited to be truly impish. “Told you I could do it.”

“How foolish of me to have ever doubted your dedication,” he scoffed, still a bit too breathless for the sarcasm he was trying to spit. It nearly came out on a gasp and your grin grew wider. He sneered, a bit too harsh under his fluster, “What with your stalwart focus on never even touching the kits I’ve bought you. Let alone making any of the other bevy of improvements that I’ve been trying to put into place for weeks now.”

“Oh?” you droned, sharp. “Well, sorry to disappoint, Lord Vil. I guess I’ll just have to try harder.”

And then without preamble, you were swallowing him down all over again all the way to the root—nose brushing the soft, pale, hair there as you dutifully squeezed your throat and ran your tongue along the underside until he was practically seeing stars. You drove forward further, hands coming up to dig your nails into his thighs as you pushed yourself until you were trembling and pinpricks of sharp tears dotted your lashes. One of those hands shifted between his legs, and you reached out with careful fingers to twine around the delicate stones there and squeeze.

Vil curled forward and came with something that was nearly a shout, trembling and loose as he emptied himself down your throat. You swallowed around each pulse, sending zip after zip of oversensitive buzzing through his veins.

You pulled away with another round of coughing, looking positively debauched. You scrubbed some of the dripping water out of your eyes and then moved to swipe away the stray drops of sticky whiteness that had managed to escape your otherwise valiant efforts to drink him dry.

“Better?” you grinned, hair mused and cheeks wet and sore.

A quip rested on his tongue. Something about how you could not be, when there’d been nowhere to go but up? But the genuinely delighted look on your face, and the soft, hesitant, undercurrent of nervous tension underneath had him loosening his fingers from your hair to rub at one of the milky stains littering your chin.

“It was good,” he said. “Better than that, even. Well done.”

“Worth taking another shower for?” you beamed.

“Worth an entire morning’s routine,” he smiled, far too soft, and leaned down to press a long, wet, kiss to your lips when you went spluttery and shy.

“I can come by your trailer, if you want,” the succubus offered, as Vil busied himself with blotting a towel over your dripping hair.

“Oh?” he mused. “I thought you only needed to feed once a day.”

“Well, sure. But I mean for your stress relief,” you said on an indignant little puff, crossing your arms tight across your chest. You peeked up from beneath your lashes, cautious. “I mean, only if you’d want that sort of thing.”

He reached out to cup your cheeks and pinch. You whined under his prodding but didn’t swat him away.

Vil sighed, dramatic and put upon. “I suppose if you insist. How could I deny my most precious little protégé anything they ask, hmm?”

“Easily, if the past few weeks are anything to go by,” you sneered around his tugging. “And who’s ‘your protégé’?! I’m the succubus here!”

“Yes,” he drawled. “A succubus who’s needed me to teach them everything they know. What a fearsome creature, indeed.”

“I could fuck you to death,” you threatened, eyes flashing bright and eerie.

Vil pinched harder, until the skin under his fingers went nearly white, and you winced—those same, slitted eyes going a bit glassy and nervous. He leaned forward until his breath ghosted along your lips and he watched your throat bob in a gulp.

“I’d like to see you try.”

#twisted wonderland imagines #twisted wonderland #twst x reader #Vil Schoenheit x Reader #Vil x Reader #vil schoenheit #Monster Mayhem #My Writing #vil shoenheit #Succubus!Reader #Monster Mayhem Succubus Part 1 #SPICY CONTENT

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skelliko · 3 months

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Sanzu Haruchiyo |°- yandere sanzu stalking you

• his stalking started off small and tame, but over time his mind began to get corrupted and caused his brain to go overboard and think that the both of you are in a relationship that you just don't know about.

• when your presence is around him hes quiet and tries to make himself almost unseen by not even looking at you, but when you're far from him his eyes are always on you as if you have a red arrow above your head that only sanzu can see

• he knows a lot of things about you despite only ever exchanging very few words maybe once or twice.

• he knows the basics such as your birthday and what your hobbies are but then it gets a little more concerning cause he also knows where you live and with who and he's gained all this information in his own way with no ones else's help, he also knows which window is to your bedroom.

• he's made a list of all the things he knows about you that way he can keep track of it all and he looks back at it almost daily making it to be engraved into his mind. though he also has another list of things that hes guessed about you, he guesses issues that you may have from certain traits that you expose and he also guesses others things that he hasn't been able to be informed on but he links those guesses from the first list.

• has quite a bit of photos stored on his phone, any chance he gets of capturing your beauty he takes a picture of the scene. he occasionally looks back on those photos and when he realises that a photo came out blurry he gets irritated because he can't go back and re-do it, but he still keeps it and doesn't delete it because it's still a memory to have.

• whenever he just so happens to walk past your house he stands back and tries to see if he can subtly see anyone through the window and he mainly hopes that it's you, but seeing a parent or a sibling isn't all that bad because then he pays attention on if there's any similarities.

• if you live in an apartment instead of a house he'd do the same thing with the window watching but he'd also occasionally walk up to your door and press his ear against it to see if he can hear any voices. depending on how big or small the apartment is then depends on how thin or thick the walls are and half the time you can hear anyone's voice or thud.

• when you're out shopping for perfume, skin care, shampoo/conditioner or anything that may leave a certain scent on you sanzu gets the same thing. he uses the same hair products as you and occasionally sprays the same perfume as you on a piece of clothing that he then sniffs pretending that the shirt is yours.

• he doesn't try to purposely follow you around, but when he unintentionally sees you in public all of his thoughts disappear and instead he chooses to just briefly see where your going. a brief moment then turns into straight up stalking like a big cat and it's prey, all the way until you get home.

• though when he does accidentally see you out in public, even if you're with someone else, sanzu gets so delusional that cause of his messed up mind he convinces himself that you're madly in love with him and that you're also stalking him in return, tho that is far from the true reality. due to this he always feels a rush of warmth thinking that your following him and he makes it out to be a one sided competition to indicate that he can do and love so much more than you can.

• any person that you come in contact with that he considers to be a threat to your 'relationship' he sabotages by spreading around fake rumours about yourself or the person so that the both of you would cut contact

• whenever he gets a dream about you he believes it to be some sort of sign, either a bad or good one. if it's considered to be a bad dream then he gets pissed off at you and makes your week to be miserable in any way he can think of. but after that week he goes back to treating you how he did before, still with a few bad intentions until he can fully get over it because he's that dramatic but it's calmed down a little.

• he sticks 'sweet' little notes on your window at night, but sometimes when you do something that he didn't like he turns those notes as threats

♡----

#not my favourite of works but its whatever #just something small i had in my mind #tokyo revengers #sanzu #sanzu haruchiyo #akashi haruchiyo #tokyo revengers haruchiyo sanzu #sanzu x reader #haruchiyo x reader #sanzu stalker #yandere #yandere sanzu #Tokyo revengers yandere

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guillotine-drop · 2 months

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Rating POSTAL Dudes by how good they smell:

POSTAL - 9/10: I think his habitual reclusion and distrust of the world would probably mean he’s showering constantly, moreso than any other Dude, especially if he thinks there’s a ‘Hate Plague’ going on. I think he smells basic; very simple routine, just enough to make sure he feels clean, so at most he’ll smell like some generic 3-in-1 body wash and shampoo/conditioner, maybe something slightly nicer just for himself (some decent $15 aftershave for that menthol scent and cooling relief).

POSTAL Redux - 3/10: Exact opposite of his original incarnation, this greasy son of a bitch isn’t scared of shit he just wants to throw explosives at ostriches and parades. Barely showers, constantly stinks of stale sweat, old blood, cheap leather and cheaper cologne, punctuated with the scent of burnt gunpowder. Borderline noxious.

POSTAL 2 - 4/10: Smells just as bad as Redux Dude but gets the edge here because every now and then he goes outside and uses the neighbor’s hose to blast himself. Shockingly uses deodorant, still not enough to be perpetually leather and denim clad in the great state of Arizona. Almost constantly reeks of sweat and has the recognizable yet faint scent of stale piss wafting off of him, accompanied by the scent of even staler crack and pungent fast food. Almost pungent enough to drown the rest out. Almost.

POSTAL 3 - 2/10: If you were to raid the wash cart after a double overtime football game, steal every jockstrap in the place, wring the sweat into a bucket, and then bring it all to a boil, you’d have somewhere in the realm of what a clean P3 Dude smells like. On average, however, this man has managed to combine the overwhelming sensory nightmares of cat piss and cheap spray deodorant into an almost lethal concoction, ONLY made breathable by the strange and overpowering smell of gasoline that seems to seep from his pores. Approach with caution and for the love of god: do not bring bleach or matches near this freak.

POSTAL 4: No Regerts - 5/10: Despite looking like he crawled out of a dumpster after a bad divorce or a fantastic honeymoon, P4 Dude is shockingly passable in terms of being able to stand next to him for a prolonged period without gagging or killing him. Having learned the efficacy of not being encased in leather in the desert, he’s managed to bring his pungency down several notches. Still reeks of sweat most of the time, and the smell of burger grease and pepperoni follows him like a specter of death, but the piss scent stopped clinging on as hard. He’s also upgraded from hose showers with no supplies to sink baths with tiny gas station travel soaps. It’s an improvement, trust me.

Brain Damaged - 2/10: Take a look at his living space in the title screen, then watch the game’s cutscenes. Just soak it all in. Now that you’ve done that, you can understand that his rank ass smells exactly as bad as you might think it does. If it can come out of his body, it’s probably soaking some part of him. If you think any of the clothes on him have been washed, you’re wrong. This man smells like if someone firebombed an outhouse and pissed on it to put it out. The best thing for him would be getting blasted with a firehouse and a box of laundry detergent. Please.

The Other Dude - 1-10/10: Entirely depends on how the BD Dude would imagine he smells depending on the situation.

POOSTALL Dude - 6/10: Despite the name, this one actually smells pretty decent. The clearly larger coat with the rolled sleeves implies some level of understanding about how not to smell like swamp ass and sweat soaked leather, and truthfully, he looks like he bathes semi-regularly, a rarity amongst these guys.

POSTAL Doe - 9/10: I admit fully and entirely to my lack of impartiality to this one, but I’m willing to stand by it even if I lose my Stink Judge License: first of all, sleeveless leather trench coat AND a crop top mean less overheat which means less sweat. Second of all, visually cleaner than pretty much any of the dudes which implies some kind of self care regimen. Third, and most importantly, girlstink counts positive. I will not be turning in my badge or my gun.

Movie Dude - 8/10: This may be controversial, but despite the squalor he lives in and the fact that hems a cuckold and that his life sucks and that he can’t get a job and that he’s a loser- I digress. I think Movie Dude is in the top echelons of Dude Stink solely because I think he’d have a breakdown if he smelled bad. This man uses Dr. Teals. He stinks like a mix of eucalyptus and peppermint. If ever there was a Dude who had a skin routine, he still wouldn’t, but he’d definitely think about it one day. I think by the end he gets an extra point just because he gets a little hotter the more deranged he is. Overall very pleasant but I still wouldn’t give him $4.

John Murray - 2/10: Hasselridge seems to have a very… interesting relationship with what is and isn’t normal, so unsurprisingly, Johnny Boy would probably smell pretty rough. Considering how dingy, run down and shitty everything in that town appears to be, I can’t imagine anyone else is smelling like roses either. Just avoid the entire place, not least of all because of the zombie thing.

Shtopor - 0/10: Bad.

Nottem Portant - 5/10: Despite the misanthropy, dollar store Nathan Explosion thing and the absolutely abysmal gameplay, Mr. Hatred is actually extremely middle of the road on stink. Sure, he doesn’t smell great, but shockingly he washes his ass despite the whole ‘death to humanity’ thing. He does get point deduction for not washing his hair though, grease mop motherfucker.

#yeah dude #postal #postal dude #postal redux #postal 2 #postal 3 #postal 4 #postal brain damaged #poostall royale #postal movie #eternal damnation #corkscrew rules #hatred #I stand by most of these. your guess as to which one(s) is the outlier

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iwanty0uu · 9 months

Text

★ THE HICKEY PRANK ★

You scrolled through Tik Tok mindlessly on FaceTime with your best friend Saylem in silence, until she broke it.

“Nahh what this bitch said she got eczema” she laughed, trying her best to catch her breathe. “Send” you replied smiling, feeling the vibration of your phone in your hand while pressing the message in your inbox. “Get out, how am I making you cry you literally have a hickey on your neck!” The boy with blue sweat pants said, “What do you mean like it’s literally my eczema..” you paused the Tik Tok now screaming and laughing. “NOOO BRO BECAUSE SHE THINK SHE SLICK OH EM GEE THATS A GOOD ONE.” tears now leaking out of your eyes, “wait bitch” you sighed “Imma *gasp* do that to mine and see how he react” The idea made your eyes brighten, “Bitch you smiling like the Grinch right now stop” Saylem said laughing.

“ Girl I can’t wait, but anyways toodles I have a prank to set up.” “Mwah later boo” she replied hanging up, it was currently 4:56 and your boyfriend came home from work in less than an hour, so you ran to get your vlog camera that sat cutely in it’s red case and began recording. The curls of your lace front bounced while you ran to the kitchen, your orange victoria secret fluffy sweater and shorts set hugged your body, protecting you from the air conditioner. It was hotter than the devil’s ass crack outside, so you knew your boyfriend Eren would be hot and irritated until he took his shower. You pressed record and backed up, “alrighty.. 3..2..1.. HI LAB RATS, welcome back or to my laboratory you already know Y/n the Scientist in this bitch okay so” you interrupted yourself while giggling, covering your hand over your mouth and cackling a bit harder.

“Ahhhh my bad y’all okay so boom today ima do a prank on my lil boo thang and it’s gonna be this hickey prank, so me and my homegirl Saylem was on the phone and I was telling her.. and then she was tellin me.. hold on lemme remember the conversation.” You paused running to get your phone. “Alright imma show you the tik tok,” laughter escaped at the idea of your boyfriend’s attitude, but you needed to move fast since time did everything but slow down. “Okay im going to be using the Fenty Beauty eyeshadow for a darker effect and then im going to throw on some of this Morphy blush and then put some powder and setting spray because i need this shit to last for real.” You ran to your desk, rummaging through your makeup bag.

Finally you finished and checked yourself out in your hand mirror, then..the front door unlocked. Eyes widening, you cursed yourself for not setting up the camera, but you had an idea “okay guys” you whispered quickly, Eren called your name, and you heard the confusion in his voice since you weren’t there like usual to greet him. “fuck fuck, imma put yall in my dresser drawer and imma flick the collar of my sweater up, and hide it until he get out the shower, while he in there im gonna set yall up in the kitchen mkay bye.” Basically throwing the camera in the drawer, you did as you said you would and greeted your man at the front door. “Hey baby love!” you chirped as he kissed your cheeks, then forehead, then lips, “whats goin on gorgeous” he smiled, you missed him, and prank aside you did feel a little bad for the headache you were about to bring on his pretty little head.

His bun was messy, chains hanging low on his white tee, he had on some simple black shorts, and his white nike socks rested above his black cats. “Boy you smell like outside..awww my poor baby sweating go wash up” you said kissing his lips, wiping the sweat off his forehead. He placed his pouch on the kitchen counter and nodded, making his way to the bathroom and grabbing a towel on the way there, you listened for the bathroom door and when it closed, you grabbed the camera, ran to the kitchen and set it up in between your red blender, red candle, and red toaster. “Camouflage” you whispered. Maybe the matching appliances wasn’t such a bad idea. After about 20 minutes, Eren came out with a towel over his shoulder, in some grey sweatpants.

“Boy where are your drawls..” you asked looking up from your phone, you nearly forgot you were on camera. His white teeth showed as he smirked, walking closer to you, lifting your chin up to kiss him. “FUCK THE PRANK IS IN EFFECT” your thoughts were so loud, you felt as if he could hear them, and his sudden halt made your heart drop to your ankles. “Y/n L/n I know that this isn’t a hickey. You are on your period, and your head isn’t big enough to suck on your own neck when your fingering yourself.” “NIGGA?” you sucked your teeth at his remark “man move around, and I dont even touch my private areas..” you said getting fake mad. “Girl you think I can’t hear you in the shower.. and fuck you mad for stop playin wit me I know this shit is make u-“ he said trying to wipe the makeup off with his hand.

His eyebrows furrowed and looked at you, “babe stop it’s hurting I rubbed my neck too hard in the shower with that exfoliating rag i be using with my African black soap, but my skin smooth and you love that shit” you said in an attempt to butter him up. “Girl bye there’s no way that’s from a fuckin rag” he said now getting serious, “the fuck u been doing all day?” he asked, damn your act could have won you a grammy, but pause.. The fuck is his issue for real? “Wait nigga u think im cheating on you?” you asked getting up, moving his hand away from your neck “Yo I never not one time said that you was, but nah for real what you was doing all day that made you get so defensive?” This joke was no longer a lil jokey joke.. he really thought you would cheat on him for real? I mean in his defense that’s the point of the prank but unless he was pranking you on your own prank, there shouldn’t even be a “if” or “but” leaving his mouth.

“I was waiting on your ass to get home thats what I was doing” you said rolling your eyes, walking closer to the camera to catch his reaction. “ Eren is a smart boy, so he had you fucked up when he was trailing your ass, actually thinking you did sum. “Nah bro don’t play dumb wit me now the fuck was you doin? The mark is fresh , do I play with you like that Y/n?” you turned to face him and you decided to play along, just for the camera… “So what if I was doing something, whatcha gonna do about it huh?” you asked crossing your arms over your chest. You gave him some of his least favorite sass, the same bratty attitude he always tried to control but to be honest, no amount of sex would let your mouth stop running, so he was always careful when it came to handling you. “Watch where you throwing that damn attitude. I am not a wide receiver so trust and believe I will throw it right back to your ass.

When you’re speaking to me, lower your tone.” his hands slid into his pockets. His ass is so sassy like this not-so-nigga wanna be a girl so fucking bad. However, the bulge in his sweats caught your attention..”He don’t got a roll of quarters in his pocket, so I don’t know what the fuck is lookin at me through his pants,” you said to yourself. This was when the realization that the video was boutta turn into a movie..ya know..the ones you get viruses from! “Okay Eren Yeager my deepest apologies,” you said smiling, rubbing your hands together like a teacher during a parent conference. Pointing your hand towards the red camera, his head followed,” My baby boo boo bear sweet cheeks vanilla muffin thick dick baby boy it is indeed a prank” you grabbed the camera quickly and ran for your life.

Eren didn’t lie about being a wide receiver but damn his ass ran fast, your final words to your audience was “HELP!” as you locked yourself into the bathroom, turning the camera off. “Baby I just wanna talk! Open the fuck up.” Eren knocked on the door, then slid his fingers under the bottom trying to get you, “Nah Gang baby not in here” you put on your manly voice trying not to laugh. The door knob stopped jiggling, but you heard a key enter the door knob and you had no choice but to hide in the cupboards under the sink. “Y/nnnnn where are you…” he asked, “Are you..here?” he said opening the shower curtain to reveal nothing, “I know your little gremlin ass can’t fit in the toilet, your forehead make the toilet seat stand up. His ass so fucking annoying.

“Alright n/n you win..”, but then the doors to the cupboard flew open, and your ass so happened to be dragged out. The camera remained in the bathroom but you two were actually boutta make a film of your own, “you finna handle my ass aren’t you bae” you sighed in defeat, “Mhm” he replied before you could even finish, “You tryna make fake ones Imma give you some that you won’t be able to hide”……

If you didn’t already, click on the fuckin red words neow.

OKAY GUYSSSSSS I hope you guys liked this one!!! This was a request from @katsaresokool and like I fell in love with the concept!! Also I won’t be uploading as much cuz classes start next week, but I’m lurkin and watching. Always. ~ 𝓁ℯ𝓁ℯ！

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jimmy-johns-was-taken · 4 months

Note

HI!!! could you do Tim wright but he’s a father figure to a scene/emo teen - headcanons 😎

like he’s not biologically their dad but he’s like a dad to them 🕺

it’s like this exhausted man who is a heavy smoker and never sleeps and is very depressed and then this scene/emo teenager that absolutely looks up to him and thinks he’s so cool lol.

Stop this is too cute! I love dad Tim

Dad Tim with a Scene daughter

Imagine

Grumpy old man with a very lively daughter

Almost like black cat and golden retriever

But not in a couple way

You play really really loud music and are super expressive

He couldn’t care less for anything and very rarely smiles

You remember the first time you made him smile though

You had told some dumb joke about a new band you started listening to, something about a black veil? Tim had no clue

But he found it funny

And he smiled

And you smiled back, face lighting up in pure happiness

Best day ever

You get him really cheesy mugs (#1 dad) and he gets you new belts, hair stuff (dye, conditioner, literally whatever you need), and all sorts of other stuff

If you’re a killer, you’re probably good friends with Nina

And by that, then also Toby, Clockwork, EJ, and others you know and are on decent terms with

Id imagine you’re really cool with Nina

I think a Tim daughter (but whose like grunge and cold and stuff) x Nina would be so cute

But that’s not this post

LATER DATE

Tim’s always nervous about you killing

He always makes sure you have something with you, like firstaid, all sorts of weapons, pepper spray!

But it’s ok, cuz he gets you band stickers, other stickers (like hello Kitty, invader zim, etc) to make them look cute

So while you might be covered in blood, you look cute

And Brian loves it

Brian thinks y’all have a great relationship

And so even if Tim isn’t the best dad

He tries, and even though y’all fight sometimes and you scream at each other

He loves you, he really does

He tries his best to be a good dad, but he never thought he’d actually be one

You might not understand everything he does for you, or why he may ground you, or why he won’t let you go out with Nina and them one night

But it’s really because he cares and just wants you to be safe

He’s not perfect, but he tries to be the best dad ever

Also, a core childhood memory is you in the back seat, heavy metal playing on the radio, and him making you tell him the name of the song and the band

#creepypasta #creepypasta headcanon #ticci toby #ben drowned #eyeless jack #jane the killer #jeff the killer #nina the killer #creepypasta x reader #plantonic creepypasta #strictly platonic #tim/masky x reader #ik masky / tim is originally a marble hornets character but i want it to be said that i’m using the cp version?

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formulaes5 · 6 months

Text

lets be lucky people (you and me)

“Hey sweetheart,” Mark whispered, pressing a kiss just under his ear, “you awake?” Seb smiled softly, tilting his head back for easier access as Mark continued to drop kisses down his neck and over his shoulder, stroking his hand gently over Seb’s hip. “Mmmm,” Seb mumbled, face pressed into his pillow, “I’m asleep, Mark… So asleep.” Or, Sebastian is sleepy and Mark is whipped. They have a nice morning together.

☆ 1.8k, T, ao3 ☆

The morning brought with it a soft kind of quiet. Seb cracked an eye open blearily, the sun filtering gently through the sheer curtains, illuminating the room with a soft glow. Mark was a solid reassuring presence pressed tightly against his back, one arm looped securely around his waist and the other resting on the pillow close to Seb’s head. It was peaceful in a way that things very rarely had the chance to be.

They floated in and out of consciousness for a while, enjoying their moment of peace together, revelling in the gentle press of skin on skin.

“Hey sweetheart,” Mark whispered, placing a kiss just under his ear, “you awake?”

Seb smiled softly, tilting his head back for easier access as Mark continued to drop kisses down his neck and over his shoulder, stroking his hand gently over Seb’s hip.

“Mmmm,” Seb mumbled, face pressed into his pillow, “I’m asleep, Mark… So asleep.”

“Course you are Sebi.”

Mark nuzzled his face into Seb’s hair one last time, before throwing the covers off and easing himself out of bed with the skill of a man that actually enjoyed getting out of bed early in the morning. Disgusting, Seb thought as he sank further into the duvet in protest, rolling into the nice warm spot left in Mark’s absence. He let out an indignant sleepy grumble, pressing his face into Mark’s pillow, taking in his comforting scent.

“C’mon mate, up and at ‘em,” encouraged Mark from where he was sat on the side of the bed, reaching out to run his hand through Seb’s curls, “shower, yeah?”

Seb opened his eyes. That got his attention.

Mark gently coaxed Seb into the shower, taking him by the shoulders and positioning him under the spray as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. Mark wrapped his arms around Seb’s waist from behind and rested his cheek against the back of Seb’s head, just holding onto him as the water beat down on his back.

Seb hummed happily as he leant back into Mark behind him, feeling contentedly sleepy standing under the warm spray of the shower, with the strong line of Mark pressed up against him. There was nothing sexual here, nothing suggested or implied. Neither of them wanted anything more in this moment than to simply be wrapped up in each other.

Seb could have happily kept leaning back until he melted into Mark, until he somehow found a way to become one with him, to be completely and totally enveloped by him; his arms and his scent and his unreasonably calming presence.

Mark reached for the shampoo, pouring it into his hands before moving to lather it into Seb’s hair, darkened by the water. He pressed his fingers into Seb’s scalp, massaging and scratching gently as he worked the product into his hair. Seb groaned in approval, pushing his head back into Mark’s hands like a cat.

“That good, sweetheart?”

“Hmmmmm,” Seb murmured, “s’good Mark.”

Mark huffed a laugh at Seb’s response, “Okay, tilt your head back for me now.”

Seb obliged, slowly waking up as Mark rinsed the shampoo from his hair, taking care to make sure the water ran backwards into his hair and not forwards into his eyes. He worked his fingers through Seb’s hair, rubbing at his scalp with just the right amount of pressure to make Seb let out a drawn out sigh at the feeling of Mark's fingers against his scalp.

Now more awake, but still happy to let Mark take the lead, Seb relaxed into the gentle movement of Mark’s hands in his hair, letting the sound and feel the water wash over him as Mark worked conditioner into his hair, before rinsing that out as well, once again tilting his head back into the stream of the shower to rinse it from his hair.

Mark smiled to himself as Seb allowed his head to be tilted back and forth. He was especially pliable like this on their quiet mornings together, not wanting to let the haze of sleep after a night well spent leave him entirely, just happy to float in the space between conscious and unconscious, letting Mark take care of him because he knew that he always would.

Seb turned around and pressed his face into the space where Mark’s shoulder met his neck, wrapping his arms around his waist, letting out a soft sigh as Mark did the same. Mark stroked his hand up and down Seb’s back, feeling the wet skin move up and down under his touch. He lifted his head to meet Mark's gaze, thinking how lovely his eyes were; a deep hazel that never failed to set him at ease. Coming to the natural conclusion that kissing Mark was always a good idea, he rocked up on his toes and moved his arms up to rest on Mark's shoulders, leaning up to meet his lips in a lazy kiss as the water flowed over them.

Mark ran his hands over Seb’s shoulders and the lithe muscles of his back as the kiss deepened, but kept the same leisurely pace as before. He ran his tongue over Seb’s bottom lip, wordlessly requesting access, which was given as it always was. The kiss was languid and slow, not to mention watery. Seb couldn’t find it in himself to mind that last part. This was the perfect way to spend the morning, he thought to himself; just him and Mark and the gentle drum of the shower against their skin.

They parted from each other softly, Mark bumping his forehead down into Seb’s for a moment before pulling apart from him and taking hold of the bottle of body wash on the shelf.

Seb looked over, noting what Mark had grabbed from the relatively small collection of toiletries, “Waitwaitwait… I wanna” he trailed off, not quite sure if the sentence “I wanna get my hands all over you” was entirely appropriate for this early in the morning.

Seb gestured vaguely, making crab like grabbing hands at Mark, who was bewildered for all of two seconds before he realised that this was Morning Seb’s request for him to hand over the bottle, which he did bemusedly.

Seb washed Mark’s body in a way that seemed to be more about his vested interest in touching Mark as much as physically possible and less about actually getting him clean, but Mark couldn’t really bring himself to care about the relative cleanliness of his body, not when Seb was so clearly enjoying himself running his hands across the flat plane of his stomach and lathering cedar scented product over his chest and down his arms. Mark let him have his fun before rinsing off under the spray and returning the favour with interest, dropping kisses across his cheek and down his neck as he went.

They eventually stepped out of the shower together, after what was no doubt an immense waste of water with very little to show for it other than their own satisfaction. Mark grabbed a towel from the rail and wrapped it around Sebastian, before slinging his own towel around his shoulders to focus on gently towelling Seb’s hair dry, rather than drying himself. He passed the towel through Seb’s hair a few more times before letting Sebastian take over.

Seb dried himself off in a perfunctory manner, then grabbed the edges of his towel and pulled them around himself, stepping forward into Mark, who wrapped his own towel around them both in a hug that was both warm and drying. They finished drying themselves quickly enough after parting from one another, moving back into the bedroom as they ran towels through their hair and down their limbs.

Mark dressed quickly, taking a second to watch Seb rifle through their wardrobe, tongue poked out adorably in concentration, before leaving Sebastian to his own devices to presumably steal yet another hoodie from Mark’s ever shrinking collection. He moved quickly down the stairs and into the kitchen, going through the familiar motions starting the coffee machine, grinding, tamping and slotting the filter handle into the machine, before moving away to find their mugs in the drawer (Beatles mug for Seb, Porsche mug for Mark).

Mark heard Seb before he saw him as he finished making their coffee, quiet footsteps on the stairs and a loud yawn breaking the relative silence. He stood leaning against the kitchen counter, waiting for Seb to inevitably shuffle sleepily towards him for a hug, which he gave gladly.

“There we go mate,” said Mark as he handed Seb his coffee, “this’ll wake you up a bit.”

Seb took the coffee gratefully, gripping the mug through the too-long sleeve of his stolen hoodie, shooting a small smile Mark’s way in thanks. He leant in for another hug, mindful of both of their drinks as he took in the fresh, clean cedar scent that they both shared now.

“Should we go outside?” asked Mark, already heading for the door, “I don’t think it’s too cold out.”

Seb followed him outside, happy enough to sit outside in the fresh air.

Mark sat down in one of the two available outdoor armchairs, leaving his coffee on the table as he did so. Seb took a look at the other armchair dubiously, it wasn’t really cold enough to use the cold as an excuse, but Seb decided that, fuck it, dignity didn’t really count before midday, and he was going to use it as an excuse all he liked. He turned and placed his mug down on the table next to Mark’s chair, before depositing himself into Mark’s lap, tucking his feet up to stay warm. Mark, who wasn’t surprised in the slightest by this turn of events, only huffed a laugh and pressed a kiss to the top of Seb’s head, wrapping one arm around him securely - ensuring that he wouldn’t fall - and using the other to reach for his coffee on the side table. One thing that he had learned early on in their relationship, was that Seb was a cuddler, through and through. If there was a surface that they were both supported by, be it bed, couch, chair, the backseat of a taxi, or even the kitchen counter, Seb would be moving in for whatever would get him the closest to Mark, sometimes even just deciding that the best way to do this was to simply drop down on top of him in bed with zero warning, which often lead to the shock of a lifetime for poor Mark, the innocently dozing victim so cruelly disrupted by a strike from above.

It all worked out pretty well though, Mark thought happily as he sipped at his coffee, feeling nice and warm with a lapful of Seb. He liked when Seb disrupted him.

They parted from each other softly, Mark bumping his forehead down into Seb’s for a moment before pulling apart from him and taking hold of the bottle of body wash on the shelf.

“There we go mate,” said Mark as he handed Seb his coffee, “this’ll wake you up a bit.”

“Should we go outside?” asked Mark, already heading for the door, “I don’t think it’s too cold out.”

Seb followed him outside, happy enough to sit outside in the fresh air.

It all worked out pretty well though, Mark thought happily as he sipped at his coffee, feeling nice and warm with a lapful of Seb. He liked when Seb disrupted him.

#sebmark #martian #f1 rpf #ao3 #my fics #ik i said i'd post this yesterday but i came home from work and immediately went to bed at 5pm lmfao #this might be a bit shit writers block’s coming back so im just tryna power thru it #rpf #fic: lets be lucky people (you and me)

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diovstheworld · 1 year

Text

La Squadra and Self Care

this has been sitting in my drafts for way too long so it’s time to finally post lmaooo. self care, hygiene, what they smell like, how they relax. a whole bunch of stuff. honestly they’re more just like personal life headcanons for the boys but oh wellll. enjoy! also i’m working on requests and stuff, i’m just so busy with class work and some things going on in my personal life i’m sorry </3

୨ ╭ ୨୧ ✦ ︶꒷꒦・⎯⎯・⎯⎯・₊ˎ✧๑

Illuso:

self care king honestly

in terms of hygiene, this guy showers twice a day, three times if hes around or has the time

face mask before bed every second night and has a morning and evening skincare routine

often likes to reward himself at the end of the week with a nice bath surrounded by some scented candles. this is his favourite way to relax

has a very strict sleep schedule. if you wake him up before 8am and it’s not important, he will fight you lmao

his hair is of most importance so takes great care of it. he washes it very regularly and loves to brush it until it’s silky smooth

he will not leave the house with any knots in his hair. for this reason, he takes a hairbrush with him in case he has to brush it whilst gone

he smells like his shampoo tbh. like some sort of floral scented shampoo

he’s always making use of body sprays and colognes too. normally also floral scented

to relax, aside from a nice bath, he likes to sit down and read people’s horoscopes. he probably keeps some sort of horoscope journal so he likes to fill that out too

sometimes he’ll play video games with formaggio and some of the other guys

Formaggio:

honestly i can’t unsee that one part where he doesn’t wash his hands after going to the bathroom so this man is…questionable with his hygiene

showers when he remembers or can be bothered

applies way too much deodorant and probably reeks of lynx africa

that being said, he probably puts on cologne sometimes

he doesn’t have a routine to be honest. just a shower and deodorant and he’s probably good to go. cologne if he remembers it or the situation requires it

illuso and proscuitto have probably tried to persuade him to do face masks and skin care routines with them but he always tells them it’s a waste of time lmao

people buy him fancy shower gels and stuff for christmas and he doesn’t take the hint. he continues to use the lynx africa shower gel that came in a set with his deodorant

all jokes aside i think he would shower when he knows he’s unclean or personally feels unclean

always taking breaks for his mental state, most likely playing video games. it’s his escape. he enjoys playing them with ghiaccio and melone

he often stays up late doing so but this man will ALWAYS catch up on his sleep lmaooo. he’ll probably be napping at the worst possible times due to a messed up sleep schedule

also likes to relax by crocheting little hats for his cat <3

also uses 2-in-1 shampoo and body wash (nothing wrong with it btw, i just definitely see him using it)

Prosciutto:

has amazing self care, this man definitely has a big self care routine (partly because he’s worried grateful dead will have a negative effect on his appearance)

definitely showers every day, maybe even twice a day

i think he would use a bit of hair products like spray or gel so i think he’d be the kind of guy who washes his hair everyday otherwise it’s gonna be really clogged up there with all that hair product lmaooo. sometimes just simply washes it with water, other times he’s using shampoo and conditioner

also uses a lot of cologne. never leaves the house without it. he’d rather be caught dead than not have on his favourite scent

speaking of what he smells like, i haven’t smelled many men’s cologne, but i do know i love the smell of tom ford noir and i can picture him wearing this

also leaning into the whole what he smells like thing, he probably has a faint whiff of tobacco from him. it lingers on his clothes but not in a pungent, unpleasant way. it’s more comforting and has become part of his natural scent alongside his cologne :) he makes sure he doesn’t reek of cigarettes

he probably has a lot of colognes (probably gets them as birthday and christmas gifts when no one knows what else to get him). he also probably has a lot of skin care items

speaking of skin care, he definitely has a routine he does every morning and night for sure. he hates it when his skin starts to feel rough in the slightest. also shaves often for this reason. he hates the feeling of hair on his face

will take time for himself by stepping away and going to read, he’ll probably do a face mask while doing so lmao

on the whole sleep schedule thing, this man goes to bed at 11pm. maybe 10:30pm if he’s extra sleepy. he’ll only stay up late if a job requires it

not exactly self care but i just wanted to include the headcanon that pros carries a tiny little foldaway comb in his suit jacket pocket at all times

i also think he’s the kind of guy who sings in the shower lmaooo. he likes to sing heart of glass by blondie (i’m going to make a post on my music headcanons for la squadra but it’s gonna be a little messy and all over the place in terms of what i think the guys would listen to sooo that post might be a while away lmaooo)

Risotto:

just like prosciutto and illuso, he has his own morning routine. doesn’t have a skin care routine per se but he definitely uses face creams and such when he remembers or has the time

also a man who showers daily

he doesn’t bother too much about his hair unlike pros and illuso since his hair is kept under his hat anyway

that being said, he does wash it regularly. he gets irritated when he knows it feels unclean

he mostly relaxes by reading and listening to music. he also likes crime novels but often finds them rather cliche and can work out everything before the end of the book

also listens to music a lot while doing things like paperwork or other activities that don’t require him listening to his surroundings. music is a big comfort for risotto for sure

i feel like he often struggles to sleep so he often uses sounds he finds relaxing to get to sleep (mostly rainforest noises)

i have a shower song for risotto too unfortunately and it’s pour some sugar on me by def leppard :,)

i think he’s definitely got the cleanliness part nailed down but he’s not so good at relaxing since he’s always so busy so he’s probably not the best at self care

he’s always getting lectured by the other guys to take a break and take some time to himself for a while because honestly, he often forgets to take any time for himself

Ghiaccio:

firstly, he definitely relaxes by playing video games and reading comic books. he loved to escape in stuff like that

i also feel like he relaxes by cleaning for some reason. like, he finds it very satisfying and calming to clean up his room while he listens to some music in his headphones and blocks out the shenanigans of all the other guys lmaooo

as for his levels of cleanliness, i can see him being a very clean man in all aspects

just like pros and illuso, he showers at least twice a day. however, unlike pros and illuso, he probably uses like a 2-in-1 shampoo and body wash. i can imagine him wondering (more like ranting) about why you would buy two individual products for more money when you can have the two products in one and save money

despite melone's efforts to try and change ghiaccio's ways, ghiaccio does not have a facial care routine in terms of things like moisturizers

he does, however, take care of his skin more now than he ever did due to constant outbreaks of spots so i can definitely see him at least using some sort of fancy face wash, even if he does refuse to do any other parts of a skincare routine

Pesci:

first of all, this boy likes watching slime videos to relax. he finds the noises very relaxing!

also likes to watch tik toks to take a break from the world

just like his big bro, he has a very good self care routine! he has a very similar one in fact

has a skin care routine and normally follows alongside prosciutto to make sure he’s doing it right

sometimes joins in the face masks

also he smells of apple shampoo! the smell is very comforting to him <3

other ways he likes to relax is by doodling. he’s not necessarily great at art but doing little doodles makes him happy. i totally think he would have his own OCs for the different media he consumes (he’s just like me fr)

also likes to read to relax! he often reads comic books and gets a lot of recommendations from ghiaccio and borrows them from him often

if he can’t fall asleep on his own, he sometimes goes to formaggio or ghiaccio’s room and falls asleep watching them play their video games

but for the most part he has a strict bedtime set for himself to ensure he gets the sleep he needs

Melone:

loves getting his nails done

also likes doing other peoples nails to help them relax too

just like prosciutto and illuso, this guy also has a good self care routine in terms of skin care and hygiene

also part of the face mask gang. i can imagine melone, illuso and prosciutto have a little self care night doing each others nails and doing face masks and having a good little gossip

part of the night owl gang. he stays up late often playing games with formaggio and ghiaccio though he probably is the first one to cave in and go to bed

again, i think he would like to read. he definitely has a stack of books at his bedside that he’s desperately trying to get through when he has the time

i think he would also have a floral scent to him. illuso often accuses of stealing his shampoo or body sprays because the smell is so similar

very sensitive to light when he’s trying to sleep. even the tiniest little bit of light sneaking through the curtains will disturb him so he sleeps with an eye mask over his eyes

Sorbet and Gelato

as per usual, i don’t have many headcanons for these guys but whatever they do, fully expect them to be joined at the hip

i mean they’re brushing their teeth in the bathroom together, they’re doing their skincare routines in sync

they shower separately but they do enjoy having baths together. in fact, this is probably their ideal way to relax

they definitely like to paint each other’s nails too when they have the time. the second any one of them has a chip in the polish, they’re taking it off and redoing it for sure

they also like to snuggle up on the sofa together with a blanket sharing the same book as they read together <3

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artzychic27 · 9 months

Note

Anymore Class of Heroes headcanons?

Adrien has a gallon of conditioner and shampoo that usually lasts a person with waist length hair up to two months. He uses them up in a day

Denise has all sorts of jewelry inspired by retro video games. Their PacMan earrings are their favorite

Nathaniel has no idea that he snores loudly

Nathaniel: *Skips gracefully into the classroom with songbirds flying behind him* I had the best sleep. How about you guys?

*His classmates all have bloodshot eyes, heavy bags, and appear to be twitching*

Kim: … Is he mocking us?

The star on Aurore’s wand actually comes off. It’s just for decoration

Again. Do NOT. Throw Jean off his groove

Jean: *In the middle of a lavish musical number when Kim walks in at the wrong moment*

Kim: Oh. Sorry, did I-

Jean: Kiiim! You interrupted! Now I have to start all over. Okay, people! From the top!

Cosette is the opposite- They will keep performing no matter what. Some heckler throws their shoe on stage? Cosette chucks it right at their head while nailing that high note

Reshma has a secret love for Indian rock and purple and black clothing, but is terrified of her grandmother finding out

Whenever parents and legal guardians come to visit, it’s always hectic with the students making sure their rooms are pristine, or they’re hiding stuff they don’t want their parents knowing about

Kim and Denise not so subtly show off their biceps just to get Ondine and Simon to simp

Once, Marinette dressed as a guy just to see how everyone would react, and the reactions were not what she expected

Chloé: … Who the fuck is that handsome man?

Jean: I saw him first!

Max: I normally don’t give in to such emotions, but… He’s is so fucking hot!

Alya: *Subtly taking photos* I can’t believe Marinette is missing this.

Every shoe Zoé owns is made of glass- Sneakers, boots, flats, crocs, sandals

Chloé and Cosette are desperately trying to get her to wear some normal shoes before she cuts her foot

Lions are still cats. And as such, Mireille freaks out whenever she sees a cucumber

Mireille: Hey, guys, I- OH, FUCK! WHAT IS THAT THING?! *Points to a cucumber in Alya’s hand*

Alya: … Hon, this is a cucumber.

Mireille: C-can it see me?! What’s it doing?!

Never leave windows open in Aurore, Nino, Lacey, and Simon’s rooms. They sleep float

If you find Ismael’s lamp, wear gloves before handling it. He doesn’t want it smudged

Nathaniel is the only one who dares to brave Marc’s ice storm and ask who upset him

Myléne only loves SOME of her stuffed animals, and the guilt is killing her

If they focus enough, Denise is able to glitch from room to room

Alya sometimes has to chase her friends out of her kitchen when she cooking, like they’re a bunch of strays

Alya: *Notices Adrien reaching for something* Hey! No!… *Taps the counter with a spoon* Go on! Get!

Adrien: … *Slowly reaches again*

Alya: Bad! *Sprays Adrien with a squirt bottle. He hisses and runs out of the room* I swear to- *Sees Kim and Marinette* Hey! Don’t make me use this spoon! I will use it!

Sabrina can’t watch trees getting cut down without feeling sick

Kim does push-ups while Max sits on his back and reads

Kagami can and will shoot any of the asshole royals with her arrows if she catches them messing with her friends and partners

They once slipped an apple into Myléne’s lunch, and Kagami went feral

Juleka will not hesitate to kick your ass with you toss rings onto her horns. And if she won’t, Rose will

She also has a regimen she follows in order to keep her horns from getting too long and too dull at the ends

Alix is a regular down at the village orphanage, often lending her assistance with fund raisers and reading to a few of the kids

It took Adrien seven hours to figure out why his hair felt heavier than normal… Nath fell asleep in it

Lila’s plots to kill of Cosette and steal its music are always thwarted by its classmates. And none of them are amused, especially Zoé

Denise: *Cracks their knuckles*

Marc: *Summons stalagmites*

Reshma: *Summons a carnivorous plant*

Jean: *Whips out his staff*

Zoé: *Hits her glass shoe against the wall, sharpening the end to a fine point* Run, bitch.

Ivan, Denise, Mireille, and Marc are the only ones able to fall asleep on hard surfaces without having back pains when they wake up

For the short time Jess was at DuPont, she became fast friends with Myléne, Adrien, Reshma, and Nathaniel since they liked being outside so much

Also, for reasons unknown, her hair blows perfectly in the wind with a strand never getting in her face. Adrien wants to know her secrets

Reshma HATES the word ‘useless’ with a burning passion. She heard her little sister get called that ever since she didn’t get her gift, and will not put up with anyone using that word against someone else

Chloé may or may not have a slight crush on the village baker’s apprentice, but that doesn’t stop Zoé and Sabrina from teasing her about it

Max does the anime glasses thing whenever he senses something off. It scares people

@msweebyness @imsparky2002

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous #mlb au #science kids #akuma class #mlb ocs #class of heroes #Disney heroes #Disney au #answered ask #ask me stuff

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kingkatsuki · 1 year

Text

I just had a dance with death but I am (mostly) glad to be alive and well enough to tell you the tale of how I almost died today. I was having a shower before work and one of satans fucking minions thought he’d join me, so here I am lathering up my hair with a bit of Aussie and then some fucking beast of a spider walks past me along the tile.

And I know what you’re thinking “oh Jo, just open the shower door.” But my shower is in my bath so I almost vaulted over that fucker like I’m doing the high jump at the Olympics. But I was brave and strong and stared down this spider while he was trying to end my entire bloodline. All fucking eight eyes was looking at me naked like the little pervert he was and I just kept watching as he tried to walk along the tile, but his legs kept slipping and it was like he was on fucking ice as he kept dropping down the wall, and part of me was like “JUST SPRAY HIM” but I didn’t do it, so be proud of me. I’ve come a long way (but it was also because I was scared if I spray him he’d touch my feet and get stuck to them and then I’d end up vomming in the shower).

So instead of banishing him to the shadow realm where he well and truly belongs I stood there praying for Yugi to show up and save me with the heart of the cards.

I kept my eye on him the entire time, and when he’d moved enough I managed to get out of the shower to finish washing the shampoo out of my hair in the sink, wearing only a towel and dripping wet all over the bathroom. No conditioner for me today, I guess.

AND MY FUCKING CAT was sitting outside the bathroom door with the audacity to meow at me for food on the other side of it while I’m screaming for my life. Absolutely no level of care when I opened the door for my welfare or safety, just a tail around my sopping leg to guide me towards the food bowl.

But the issue now is I don’t know where the spider is, so I’m thinking I might need to pack a bag and move out because this is clearly his house now.

#jo talks #this is like my third spider saga on this blog #why does this keep happening to me?😫

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mechatiqe · 5 months

Text

⠀

TAGGED BY: @wickedserpent , ur so real for that

— TAGGING: @91cmspoilers @more-than-a-princess @quickdeaths @heartheaded @magescheer @the-ultimate-muses + anyone that wants to try: pretend i tagged you and go for it

《 𝙒𝙃𝘼𝙏 𝙄𝙎 𝙔𝙊𝙐𝙍 𝙈𝙐𝙎𝙀’𝙎 𝘼𝙀𝙎𝙏𝙃𝙀𝙏𝙄𝘾 ? 》

BOLD any that applies to your muse and italicize any that conditionally applies to your muse.

⠀

[ 𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒. ] red. orange. yellow. green. blue. pink. purple. black. white. teal. brown. silver. gold. grey. lilac. metallic. matte. royal blue. strawberry red. charcoal grey. forest green. apple red. violet. navy blue. crimson. cream. mint green. sky blue. pale jade. copper. magenta. rainbow.

[ 𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐒. ] fire. ice. water. air. earth. rain. snow. wind. moon. stars. sun. heat. cold. steam. frost. lightning. thunder. sunlight. moonlight. dawn. dusk. twilight. midnight. sunrise. sunset. dewdrops. darkness. shadows. nature. aether. quintessence. blood. life. death.

[ 𝐖𝐄𝐀𝐏𝐎𝐍𝐒. ] scythe. fists. legs. sword. dagger. spear. lance. bow & arrow. hammer. shield. poison. guns. axes. throwing axes. whips. knives. throwing knives. pepper sprays. tasers. baseball bats. machine guns. slingshots. katanas. maces. staffs. wands. powers. magical items. magic. rocks. mud balls. claws. teeth. stealth. strategy. robotics.

[ 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐒. ] gold. silver. copper. platinum. titanium. rose gold. diamonds. pearls. rubies. sapphires. emeralds. amethyst. metal. iron. steel. glass. rust. wood. porcelain. paper. wool. fur. lace. leather. silk. velvet. denim. linen. cotton. charcoal. clay. stone. asphalt. brick. marble. dust. glitter. blood. dirt. mud. smoke. ash. shadow. carbonate. rubber. synthetics. ribbon.

[ 𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄. ] grass. leaves. trees. bark. roses. daisies. sunflowers. tulips. lavender. petals. seeds. hay. sand. rocks. roots. flowers. fungi. ocean. river. frozen lake. meadow. valley. forest. desert. tundra. savanna. rain forest. caves. underwater. coral reef. beach. waves. space. clouds. mountains. snow. mist. pond.

[ 𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐋𝐒. ] lions. wolves. foxes. eagles. owls. falcons. hawks. swans. snakes. turtles. crocodiles. ducks. bugs. spiders. birds. whales. dolphins. fish. sharks. horses. cats. dogs. bunnies. penguins. deer. crows. ravens. mice. lizards. werewolves. unicorns. pegasus. dragons. monkeys. tigers. parrots.

[ 𝐅𝐎𝐎𝐃/𝐃𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐒. ] sugar. salt. candy. bubblegum. wine. champagne. hard liquor. vodka. beer. coffee. sake. tea. water. spices. herbs. apples. orange. lemon. cherry. strawberry. watermelon. vegetables. fruits. meat. fish. pies. desserts. chocolate. lollies. cream. caramel. berries. nuts. cinnamon. burgers. burritos. tacos. pizza. ambrosia. eggs. milk. ramen. chips. ice cream. cereal.

[ 𝐇𝐎𝐁𝐁𝐈𝐄𝐒. ] music. art. gardening. smithing. sculpting. painting. sketching. fighting. writing. composing. cooking. baking. sewing. training. dancing. acting. singing. martial arts. self-defense. electronics. technology. cameras. video cameras. computer. phone. movies. theater. libraries. books. magazines. CDs. records. vinyl. cassettes. piano. daydreaming. strings. violin. guitar. electronic guitar. bass guitar. harmonica. harp. woodwinds. brass. flute. bells. exploring. playing cards. poker chips. chess. dice. motorcycle riding. eating. sleeping. climbing. running. jogging. parkour. studying. video games. comics. manga.

[ 𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐂. ] balloons. comedy. bubbles. cityscape. light. dark. candles. growth. decay. war. peace. wealth. power. percussion. clocks. mirrors. pets. diary. journal. fairy lights. madness. sadness. happiness. optimism. pessimism. loneliness. suffering. family. friends. strength. assistants. co-workers. enemies. loyalty. smoking. drugs. kindness. love. hugs. kisses. spring. summer. autumn. winter. poverty. farmland. countryside. suburban. village. depression. longing. sloth. pride. envy. wrath. greed. gluttony. lust. melancholy. fate. soulmates.

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#⠀memes | tagging : aesthetics

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