#But i feel like he should be dating the kinds of LA girls my programming friend dates | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ri-ahhh · 3 years

Text

for the win

After dealing with a lifetime of insecurities, Winnie Walker finally gets the courage to pursue her dreams, with a few bumps along the way. But that confidence may not carry over when it comes to a certain hazel-eyed football player who’s had her attention for much too long.

A/N: this was a random inspo that hit me out of nowhere a while ago and I was gonna make it an epic oneshot, but I think I’ll just break it into parts instead. So, hence, this is part one. Hopefully you like it enough for it to be even worth posting more.

warnings: none yet, other than this is def gonna be as cheesy as you think it is

***

Winnie Walker has always considered herself an enigma. Not in that annoying, ‘I’m so cute and quirky’ type of way, but rather in the way that made her someone who never quite fit into one defined space. The kind perfected by years of self doubt, an emotionally distant mother, and the random ebb and flow of confidences and insecurities that always helps her remember that she is, in fact, perfectly un-extraordinary: her face is too round, but she’s always been called pretty; her personality is dry enough that she finds it challenging making female friends, but she fits in well with the boys; and she has a penchant for being the last one to talk about anything she might be feeling until she puts a pen to paper and speaks through the mouths of others.

Sports and writing were her main passions, but it still took until her senior year of high school to decide that she wanted to be a sports journalist. Not just a journalist, though -- more than anything, she dreamed of stepping out into the light as a broadcaster. Shy by nature but an athlete at heart, it once again put her in that enigmatic grey space where she wasn’t sure what the hell she was thinking.

But it’s what her heart was calling for her to do. For the first time in her life, Winnie Walker felt sure about something despite everyone’s doubts -- including her own. She grew up an athlete, and some of her fondest memories as a child were caught between either being in her dad’s man cave with all of his friends, cheering on their team of choice for whatever sport was on, discussing heatedly what plays should or shouldn’t have taken place. Or, on the volleyball court.

The full ride offer from USC that was presented but never came to fruition because of a devastating knee injury in one of her last club tournaments haunted Winnie in the months leading up to her high school graduation.

Her mother, Dahlia, was not-so-secretly thrilled. A stage mother through and through, she had always supported her daughter as she made headway in her sport as a star player, but it was an open point of contention that Winnie planned to follow her passion for it all the way to college. She wanted her middle daughter to attend the local university, get a nice marketing degree, and settle into a high rise in downtown Dallas, where she could point at during brunch with her friends and brag about the pretty penny her kid made with her perfectly nice degree she attained in her perfectly nice hometown.

That’s not Winnie, though, and everyone except Dahlia knew it. No one was all too surprised that she still wanted to escape to California (again, except her mother), even if they were slightly shocked about her decision for a major. The reactions from her friends and sisters and dad had her even more excited as she scanned the email of her academic acceptance into USC. It finally gave her the courage to spill the beans to her mother as well.

Dahlia Walker very much scoffed in the face of her quiet, introverted, hopeful daughter sitting across the kitchen island while she scrubbed at the dishes from dinner.

“Winona, sweetie, you refused to even speak at your sister’s wedding as the maid of honor, and you want to be on TV? With all those... men?”

Winnie cringed a little bit and rolled her eyes at the slightly far-off look on her mother’s face as she no doubt started imagining the sweaty athletes the reporters would stand next to post-game.

“You don’t think I could do it?” she asked flatly, flicking a chip of her nail polish off her finger so it flew across the otherwise spotless granite — her mom hated when she did that.

Dahlia’s hands picked up their pace again in the suds, slowed down by whatever middle-aged fantasy was going on in her mind. She shook her head, the highlights in her perfectly styled blonde bob shifting under the recessed lights.

“The girls who do that are just so bouncy. Friendly. They curl their hair.”

Winnie bit her lip. She didn’t know if she should laugh or cry. Her body felt deflated. “I knew I could count on you to be supportive.”

“Oh honey, I’m just trying to be realistic with you,” her mother said dismissively. Like she didn’t realize the pang her words caused to spread in Winnie’s chest; it should have been be all-too familiar by then, but the sting was never weakened with age or predictability. “And California? Are you really ready to be so far from home? You hardly ever even leave your room.”

It had taken everything in Winnie to hold back the open scoff she longed to throw at her mother; instead, she just stood up and left the kitchen, along with any childish hope that Dahlia might ever make an effort to really know her middle daughter.

Because anyone that knew Winona Elle Walker could predict just how much she would thrive in California. In the persistent sunshine that never quite reached the peak of being too hot for very long, unlike the nearly six months of 90 and 100-plus degree days of summer she knew so well in Texas. Within close proximity to a beach that didn’t have swamp-colored water washing ashore.

In a place well over a thousand miles away from Dahlia.

And that’s exactly how Winnie found herself in LA: thriving. She made friends easily, enjoyed life on the USC campus while she studied the exact major she had set out for the first day she sat down in her first class -- Navigating News in the Digital Age class -- and it was a relatively cheap flight home if she ever missed it too much. Winnie started feeling less like an enigma, and more like someone whose quirks were becoming more of a benefit to her success than she could have ever imagined.

Now, as a woman in her senior year, nearly 22 and set to graduate in only a few months time, she’s finally up for the most coveted position in her major: being the prime time student reporter at the biggest sporting events of the school’s entire athletic program — the Trojan football games. Reporting at football games was a job always reserved for seniors, and she had been driving her roommate — and best friend in California — Naomi crazy all summer prepping for the spot’s audition.

“Winnie, babe, you know the plays backwards and forwards. You’ve understood more about the rules of football since you were a kid than I’ll ever know as a grown woman. You have all the key players’ and coaches’ names and numbers memorized. You couldn’t be any more prepared,” she smiles, good-natured irritation clear in her eyes and behind the blinding smile that shone from her mocha-colored skin.

It softens some when Winnie stood from the couch, and Naomi reaches over and slaps her retreating ass just hard enough to make Winnie yelp and giggle. “Not to mention those squats are paying off big time, bitch. You’re gonna kill it.”

Winnie rolls her eyes and continues to make her way to the kitchen to refill her wine glass. “The camera won’t see my ass, but thanks.”

Naomi winks. “No. But Grayson Dolan might.”

Grayson Dolan — the walk-on that had stunned everyone when he was thrown into a game his freshman year after two of the starting tight ends had become injured on two consecutive plays. Now a senior himself, he’s led the team ever since in receiving yards, receptions, and TD’s, and is a clear prospect for the NFL in the coming months.

He also happens to be the player Winnie had drunkenly admitted she had a crush on during a girls night last year, and her friends have yet to let her live it down. She had felt ridiculous saying she had a crush as a 21 year-old, but that’s really all it was; he was hot, an extremely talented player, and she barely knew him beyond that one time he had spilled a drink on her at a frat party, and the rather interesting reputation that followed him around campus. There was nothing more to it.

Even if her attraction to him hasn’t died down in the passing time.

Winnie only blushes and pours herself a little extra, blaming the Maison No. 9 when Naomi throws her head back with a cackle and calls out the matching pink in her cheeks.

The morning of her audition, a mere two weeks into her fall semester, Winnie has butterflies fluttering madly in the pit of her belly. Her truer nature of being somewhat shy and timid in these situations has never left, always flaring up in moments of self-doubt and unpredictability. Undoubtedly, however, this audition deserves all the nerves; it’s a clear stepping stone into network broadcasting, and would almost guarantee her a spot as an intern at FOX Sports next semester.

She stares at herself in the mirror for a moment, silently urging herself to get her shit together, and takes a deep breath before eyeing Naomi’s curling iron plugged in by the sink adjacent to her own.

Winnie hasn’t curled her hair once in the nearly four years she’d been in LA. Not for nights out, or auditions, or even a date. A brief moment of madness overtakes her as she stands there staring at the metal device, her hand starting to reach out as words that should be long forgotten ring loud and clear in her head. For a second, the pale beige paint of her apartment bathroom turns the light blue and grey color scheme of her childhood one. Her mom had ‘surprised’ her with the the renovation one year when she decided to redecorate the house while Winnie was at volleyball camp, insisting she had chosen Winnie’s favorite colors, when in reality it simply matched the rest of the monotone suburban house that Winnie secretly couldn’t stand. It was boring, and typical, and...stuck, despite its relative newness.

With that, the fog clears as quickly as it had come, and she sets her jaw determinedly. She hasn’t let Dahlia psych her out for this long; she isn’t about to let now be the first time since she’s been out here on her own.

And maybe Naomi was right. Maybe she’d catch a certain tight end’s eye with a tight end of her own, after all.

The nausea suddenly returns as she shakes her head and reaches for her straightener instead, flicking it on before sectioning off her hair.

“No wonder you’re so fucking single, Win.”

#dolan twins #grayson dolan #blurb #g blurb #why am i posting this in the height of everyone elses amazing oc’s #stupid

66 notes · View notes

valkirsif · 3 years

Text

Unthinkable CH48/???

Word 3500

Warning nothing

Y/N woke up early to prepare breakfast while Thomas showered, found Luke in the room busy on the phone and nodded to him before disappearing into the kitchen, turned on the coffee machine and took out bacon and eggs, set the oven at 200 degrees and prepared the baskets of eggs,

"Good morning Y/N" Luke greeted, taking a seat at the table,

"Day," she replied smiling, "Breakfast?" asked taking cups and plates from the cupboard,

"Would you like to thank you, Thomas?" he asked checking that the schedule was perfect,

"He's running out of shower" laughed the woman handing him the coffee, turned and took the baskets out of the oven,

"Day Honey " Tom said hugging her from behind, reaching out to make the coffee, "What a smell, I'm hungry" he said greeting Luke and taking a seat at the table,

"Day my King" smiled the woman doing the dishes, "I want to make sure you don't get hungry while traveling" she passed the dishes to the men and sat down in front of Tom, they ate staying eye to eye, Y/N tried to smile and not to be seen sad, he would have to stay away again but he tried to concentrate on the commitments she had made with Sophie, already in the afternoon she had an appointment with her for a charity afternoon for a hospital and was curious to see how these events worked,

" Thomas .. " Luke broke the peace,

"I'm getting dressed and I'm there," the man replied, standing up, "Darling, will you take me to the airport?" asked going up, Y/N nodded pulling jeans and sweater out of the closet, in 10 minutes they were ready, the car was waiting for them in front of the gate, they crossed the city and arrived well in advance at the airport, unloaded the luggage and headed to check in between the glances and the stolen shots,

"Miss Hiddleston if you want to pass then I'll let her out" said the smiling stewardess making them sit in the parlor of the company, they waited about twenty minutes

"We have to go," said Luke as he entered, "they announced the flight",

"I'll call you as soon as we land" said Thomas taking her face in his hands, "This month will fly you'll see" smiled kissing her,

"Yeah" Y/N replied with a lump in her throat, "I will miss you so much" she tried to smile, she hugged him before saying goodbye, a stewardess accompanied her to the garage where she burst into tears as soon as she got into the car, it would have been hard a month without him, "Heck, get over it," she said to herself shaking her head, she realized that crying about something like this was ridiculous, promotions were part of the man's job and she would keep busy, she had the new house to manage. workers would start on Monday, in two days he had an appointment with Drew for the furniture and an endless line of charity engagements, as Tom said would fly by.

Back home she went up to her room to change, had prepared a couple of dresses the night before, chose a simple blue dress with a peacock-tail pattern on the bodice and low-heeled shoes she chose a light make-up, had advice from make- up artists at the last event they attended for a natural and undemanding make-up that is especially easy to obtain, had never loved wearing make-up, she looked in the mirror satisfied with the result and went back to the room where she found Ali waiting for her,

"What are you doing here?" she asked in amazement, it wasn't an official release hadn't called her,

"Mister Hiddleston has prepared some kind of program" said Ali smiling, retrieving a folder from the bag, "I'm here to discuss days and times if you have time" handed her the program, Y/N opened the folder and looked at the sheets curiously, there it was a list of designers and shops,

"I thought a walk in Italy would distract you" she read at the bottom of the page in Tom's elegant handwriting, smiled and made himself comfortable,

"I have plenty of time, Sophie passes in a couple of hours" she replied cheerfully,

"Well, as a premiere you have Rome, Milan and Turin" she said checking the dates, "You will need at least 3 evening dresses and something for the day",

"I have too many day clothes" laughed the woman, "I could go next week",

"Perfect, where do you prefer to stay in Milan?" asked while texting, "Hilton, Four Seasons?",

"Nowhere" laughed Y/N taking the phone, "Hello, disturbing?" asked when they answered,

"Hey Poppy you never disturb" said Robi cheerfully, "Tell me everything",

"If I invade your house for 2/3 days next week what about?",

" Well I say I'll take you" answered the man laughing, "Why in Italy?",

"For the Italian premieres I need suitable clothes and Thomas pointed out that choosing home stylists would be better" replied Y/N, "I take the opportunity to take a tour and be with you, then I send a message to the others too",

"Tell me about my arrival so I'll take a couple of days off" he said happily,

"It will be nice to be together for a few days!",

"I also bring you the passes for the premier so we can have an evening together",

"Wow" he exclaimed in amazement, "What an honor" they laughed together,

"I want you with me the evenings in Italy, so Milan, Rome and Turin" said Y/N regarding the program, "Since we don't have a support in Turin, I thought I'd take a room for you too",

"But is it okay with Tom?" Robi asked perplexed, "We don't want to seem .. how to say .. here are the profiteers",

"Imagine he is happy if we are together when we can", they greeted each other and the woman returned to focus on the program,

"Ok, the living room is done too" she said reading the list of stylists, "I have no idea how this kind of evidence works .. " said turning to her pr ,

"I 'll make a few phone calls, in these cases it is better to rely on a professional who will collect the clothes of the designers and show them to you .. " replied Ali professionally, "..If that's okay with you I would ask Miss Urbinati, she is the one who takes care of this aspect for Mister Hiddleston ",

"It's fine and I'll be able to explain myself much better in my language" she laughed, grateful for the choice,

"I'll arrange the appointments and I'll call you back" said Ali, "the workers arrive on Monday and on Wednesday you have an appointment with Mister Pritchard , he called to postpone your appointment, so I would fix it for the weekend, from Friday to next Monday .. "

"You are the best Ali" smiled Y/N, "I would not be able to make ends meet" laughed greeting her, "I'll wait for the program then",

“I'll send you a message tonight with times and appointments” she replied, writing everything down in her diary, “Do you prefer to change stocks or are the usual ones okay? she asked,

"Sorry but I have to put my feet up" answered the serious woman, "I'll be at my house, with my family, I don't want anyone around",

"Are you sure?"

"Very sure, Gian and Phil will defend me in case or I'll do it alone but I don't want to be followed and controlled even from a distance" Y/N was very serious, she didn't want to feel like an animal even in Italy,

"I don't insist but I won't tell Mister Hiddleston , you know how he thinks .. " Ali laughed resignedly, the women said goodbye, Sophie arrived shortly after splendid in her afternoon dress,

"Y/N you are beautiful" she said greeting her, "I like the feather design",

"Thanks, I hope it's suitable" she replied, making her sit down, "You look great too, but you always look great" laughed,

"I'd like to fill the top a little more but I don't think anything will grow anymore" Sophie laughed, "I'm a bit envious of your cleavage "

Y/N made coffee and they chatted for half an hour,

"Shall we go with my car or do you prefer to drive?" Sophie asked as the woman closed the door,

"I don't know the city but it wouldn't be a problem, I don't have a driving license" Y/N smiled, "Maybe I should take it, I can't always call a taxi",

"That's a great idea, you could surprise Tom when he gets back",

"Do you say that in a month it is possible?" asked Y/N in Italy it took months, "I have a lot of commitments I don't think I can do it",

"When we leave the hospital I'll take you to get information then you decide" Sophie replied getting into the car, she liked the idea of going to pick up Tom herself on his return.

They entered the room where the hospital director was waiting for them,

"Sophie welcome" he said friendly, shaking her hand,

" Stephan hi" she said cheerfully, "I'd like to introduce you Y/N will join us if that's okay with you" she smiled introducing the woman, Y/N stepped forward to shake the manager's hand,

"Very pleased" she said smiling,

"My pleasure" replied the affable man, "I'm glad you joined Sophie for this day .. ",

"Can I ask what we raise funds for, it's my first time and I'm a bit confused" smiled Y/N,

"We have to finish fixing the new neonatal ward and we would like to take some machinery" replied the man, "Don't worry it's very simple, in the end you just have to smile" Stephan laughed making way for the women, a part of the hospital park had been set up with wicker tables and armchairs, guests were strolling around the patio sipping drinks and chatting, Y/N followed Sophie observing her every movement, how she smiled and how she stood in front of the few journalists who had been invited,

"Miss Hunter .. Miss Hiddleston can we take a picture of you together?" asked a photographer approaching, the women smiled and posed close together, Y/N began to feel more comfortable moved between the tables and guests smiling affably, answering questions and thanking for donations, stopped to talk to a girl ,

"May I ask you why did you decide to turn to charity?" she asked taking a drink,

"I think everyone should do good if they have the chance," she answered sincerely, "In the position I am in it seemed stupid not to help",

"What does your partner say about this idea?" she continued with the questions, "Are you waiting for you in LA?"

"Thomas fully supports me as a UNICEF ambassador" she replied, "At the moment he left for the promotion of the film .. ",

“So you and Thomas are still together? That's not what people say" she smiled staring at her,

"Of course we're still engaged" Y/N said uncomfortably, "The paparazzi just do their job" she realized that that girl was not just a guest, she didn't know how to behave,

"There are several photos of her with other men .. " she made herself under the girl, ".. in various events",

"Unfortunately I'm a very sociable person .. " Y/N tried to laugh, "..I never thought my showing affection to friends would be misrepresented like this",

"She has many friends" she said curiously, "Some very famous",

" Well Rice and I have known each other for a lifetime if you're talking about him" she replied as neutral as possible, "And Evans is like a brother to me",

the reporter was about to continue the interrogation when a man approached, "here is another reporter" thought anxiously Y/N,

"This way miss .. " he said seriously to the reporter, "If you want to follow me to the exit" he motioned her to sit down, the girl smiled greeting Y/N and followed him without making a fuss, she had no reason to have obtained what he wanted,

"Everything good?" Sophie asked continuing to smile as if talking about the weather, "I'm sorry every now and then it happens that journalists interested in scandals come in",

"A little anxious about what I will read tomorrow .. " Y/N replied trying to be vague, ".. I can never let my guard down",

"I went through it too at the beginning of my story with Ben, but with my work I recognize a journalist in disguise when I see him" she laughed, taking her by the arm and returning to the guests,

"We have to go out together more often then so you can teach me all the tricks" laughed in turn Y/N finding her calm, at the end of the afternoon the director of the ward thanked the guests for the donations, the money collected would be used to restore the neonatal ward and buy the latest generation incubators, the women were extremely happy with how the day went, Y/N felt very tired, already at the dinner in Paris she realized how tiring it was to raise funds, smile and be affable and perfect was unnerving, she and Sophie went out smiling and left,

"How do you feel?" Sophie asked cheerfully, " It went very well as the first time",

"I'm a bit exhausted mentally but I feel great" Y/N replied smiling, " It's really satisfying to do something good for the children",

"We have collected almost all the money we need"

"Thanks for involving me, I can't wait to do it again" laughed Y/N relaxing,

Sophie crossed the city to go to the driving school near her and Benedict's house ,

"Here we are" she said as he parked in the driveway, "Before I take Sam's then we'll take something from me" she smiled accompanying her, Y/N followed her wondering how he would get her license in a month, they entered the studio making the doorbell ring,

" Sophie dear, welcome," said a middle-aged man walking around the desk, "How can I help you?" he asked hugging her,

"Hi Sam I'm here with a challenge" she replied dissolving the embrace and presenting Y/N, "She is Y/N, she has to get her driver's license and she is less than a month old" laughed,

"Nice to meet you Miss" he said shaking her hand, "Nice challenge really how come you want to get your driver's license so fast?"

"My pleasure" smiled Y/N, " Well first of all because I don't always want to book taxis or private cars and, secondly, I would like to surprise my boyfriend when he comes back" she laughed with them, " I know it's almost impossible but I would to attempt",

"Nothing is impossible here" he laughed making her sit, "As for the theory we use a practical app that he can use both on the phone and on the computer so he can take the test tests whenever wants" he began to explain, "Ditto for the lessons can follow them from the computer with a tutor if you want ",

"It would be perfect, I have a lot of commitments in the coming weeks" Y/N replied happily, "For the guides instead?" she asked worried about not having time to do them,

"It depends on you" said Sam, "If you use a car with manual or automatic transmission, in the first case you have to drive here every other day .. ",

"And this is difficult, next week I'm leaving for Italy for a few days .. " replied the woman, "..the second option?",

".. the second option is automatic change with a private tutor who will give you lessons every time you move" concluded Sam practical,

"Very well, the automatic gearbox gone .. when can I start?" she asked cheerfully, she could do it,

"If you give me your documents I will register you immediately" he said making a copy of his documents while calling the tutotr , "Erik I have a special student for you can you come in now?", 10 minutes later a guy walked into the agency,

"Here I am Sam" he said smiling introducing himself,

"She is Y/N Hiddleston from tomorrow you will take care of her lessons" said Sam explaining the program, "You are the most suitable person, you know how to juggle with clients' commitments and you are a great teacher",

"Miss Hiddleston is a pleasure" he said introducing himself, "I'm at your complete disposal" he smiled,

"Um thank you and give me some you" she replied to the smile, "If you are free we could start tomorrow, I'm full of commitments and I have to move a lot",

"Great with the more practice you do with the easier it will be to pass the exam" he laughed, "Can I get an overview of your schedule so I can organize myself?"

" Sure .. " Y/N answered taking out of the bag the folder that Ari had left her, ".. well, I hope it's not too delusional for you" she smiled giving the young man the sheets, Erik quickly read the program,

"I see that you have no commitments tomorrow" he said, reviewing the sheets, "I could come and pick you up tomorrow morning at 8 to take the first lesson and explain how the car works, what do you say?" he asked looking at her,

"It would be perfect if you have no other commitments" replied the cheerful woman,

"I am a private tutor, I work with those who do not have the time to come here to follow the lessons" replied Erik explaining himself, "For the next month I will be your shadow .. also in Italy" he laughed, Y/N paid the registration, she thanked Sam and left his number with Erik before leaving and going to Sophie's house.

"Take a seat, make yourself at home," Sophie said inviting her to come in, " BEN .. Benny are you home?" she said aloud checking the alarm and taking off her shoes, "He'll be in her study" she told Y/N leading her into the room,

"What a beautiful house" Y/N said looking around, it was very similar to theirs, large and bright spaces, a large garden, the open library hidden behind a double arch in colored bricks , he heard a violin playing somewhere in the house, she didn't recognize the melody but she liked it very much,

"It will sound familiar" Sophie laughed, "Those two have the same tastes, when Tommy comes back we have to organize a dinner with us" she said taking drinks for both of us, "I'm sure you will love hearing them play together",

"Play together?" she asked in astonishment Y/N drinking, Sophie nodded to the music Y/N bringing with if ,

"Don't tell me that Tom has never played for you" she asked in amazement, "How did he win you over then?" she asked laughing entering the studio with her, Benedict had not noticed their presence concentrated on the score, Y/N gasped seeing the studio which was nothing more than a music room, the man was playing the violin in the center of the room, on one side there was a dark and shiny piano and a series of wind instruments, the women sat in silence to listen applauded as soon as the man finished the piece,

"Hey my love, welcome back" he said smiling and kissed her partner, "How was your afternoon?" he asked cheerfully placing the violin on the cabinet, "Y/N well arrived" he greeted her embracing her,

"Thank you," she replied, getting comfortable again, "Is there something you and Thomas don't do perfectly?" she asked cheerfully, the trio laughed,

"She didn't know Tommy plays too" Sophie laughed to her boyfriend, "You see he didn't use your tactic to win her over",

"We just needed him to serenade me" laughed Y/N, "He had already bewitched me by reading me the Henry.. if he had also played I would have fainted at his feet immediately",

"Tactic number 2" said Benedict laughing, "Read Shakespeare .. ",

"If you didn't grow up here I understand that the extreme romanticism of English men is deadly" said Sophie, "I also fell like a ripe fruit .. and I know all their techniques" she laughed, they dined together chatting about the day and Benedict's projects ,

"I'll put my shoes on and I'll walk you home dear," Ben said standing up,

"Don't bother I already called a taxi" Y/N replied following the couple to the door, "Sophie thanks for the day, I really enjoyed myself and I learned a lot" she said hugging the woman,

"See you on Tuesday for the next event, dressed comfortably we will be on the farm" she smiled greeting her, the taxi had arrived,

"Where do I take you Miss?" asked the taxi driver, Y/N gave the address and picked up the phone,

§Friday boys arrive in Italy to shop keep free!§ she wrote to the group,

§ Really? § , § How wonderful§, §How long are you staying? §, they all asked together,

§I arrive on Friday and leave on Tuesday§ Y/N replied cheerfully for that weekend at her home,

§I will make your bed§ wrote Gian happily,

§ Gian is supported by me§ Roby replied, §We can all gather here§,

§Will, tomorrow I ask for a couple of days§ Franc replied , §Jack is in Vienna it's a shame§,

§As I said to Roby I also bring you the passes for the premieres of the film .. I want you with me§ said Y/N, they were all in turmoil for those evenings,

§Beautiful you should also invite Simo§ Rice sent her a private message,

§ Lucifer I don't think about it§ she replied annoyed by that request, it was like him to forgive certain things, § I know how you think but I'm not you§,

§I tried:) § replied the friend, §I could surprise you with my presence on Sunday§,

§ REALLY? § she asked excitedly by the news,

§Yes I have a photo shoot on Monday§ answered Rice, § And maybe I can also be there at the premier of Rome§, Y/N was very happy with that news,

§So I'll take you out to dinner just the two of us .. I owe you an evening after having blown you away after the parade§ wrote Y/N hoping he was not yet offended by that escape,

§ It is the minimum after having fled ;) §,

§See you guys on Friday, I want you nice loads for shopping§ greeted Y/N, he was home by now, the day had been long, weird and exciting, she just wanted a coffee and hear from her man, looked at watch, was almost midnight, she did the math by now Thomas's flight must have almost arrived, she took a shower and waited for the man to call her.

4 notes · View notes

cenestpasmoi-bechloe · 4 years

Text

As I Lost My Heart in You

When you’re 16, initials of your soulmate appears on your wrist.It varies by person, but everyone usually spends time trying to find theirs. It doesn’t always mean that there’s going to be a relationship, sometimes you spend your whole life trying to find your soulmate.

Title from Mariah Carey's Underneath the Stars.

Gifted to @177-8 for the Pitch Perfect Fandom Drive!

Thank you for contributing!

I hope you enjoy it and I apologize for taking so long!!

For more info on how to help, visit the

@ppfandomdrive

page.

Read on Ao3

Beca Mitchell got hers the week of her 16th birthday. She didn’t believe in soulmates and initials. Her dad and her mom had their initials, but they had gotten divorced, her mom died of cancer, and while she was fighting it, her dad had found his ‘soulmate’. She couldn’t forgive her father for ding that to her mother. But she had gotten her initials whether she liked them or not, two letters, CB in cursive.

By that time, she had figured that she was gay, and she had dated a few people.

Her first girlfriend, was Juliana Taylor, but they had broken up, just because they weren’t feeling ‘it’ anymore. Juliana had BM on her wrist, but it probably wasn't her anyways.

She’d decided she’d give boys a try when Conner Basin asked her out. It was less of a date and more of a hangout with a bro, but she had figured he wasn’t the one either, after he had criticized Beca’s favorite video game. He had said the graphics were bad, and that the settings weren’t enough. Beca had called for her friend Stacie to come pick her up at the mall right away, which she did, with her flavor of the week, Jesse Owens.

Boys were a no-go.

Two years later, she was off to college, Barden University, full ride by her father, who is a faculty at Barden. Stacie went along with her, but with a full ride scholarship with her amazing high school grades. Barden had a weird rule about roommates, where everyone had their roommates select randomly by the housing office. That meant that she couldn’t room with Stacie, and she was bunked with Kimmy-Jin, the international student from Korea. Stacie had been roomed with a girl named Alisha, who stacie couldn’t stand. Stacie was literally trying to find a sorority just for their housing.

Chloe Beale had gotten her initials on her 16th birthday. She didn’t have one before her party, but somehow had one when she took a shower that night. It was a BM in bold letters. She had tried hard to find her soulmate, but couldn’t find anyone that was the ‘one’. She had dated a Bobby Markham, but his birth name was Robert, which made his initials RM, thus making it impossible for him to be her soulmate. But where was the rush anyways? She was still 17. She had college plus a few more years to figure out this whole soulmate thing.

She was off to Barden which had an amazing pre-vetrenary program. She met her best friend, Aubrey Posen during her first year biology class, and they had joined the Barden Bellas together soon after. She started dating Bay Matthews, a boy going to Georgia State at a party during the summer, but had broken up due to him being very possessive.

She had worked hard in the Bellas until her junior year, the senior Bellas that year were a bitch. The captain, Alice was the worst of them all. She bossed everyone around, and made Aubrey and Chloe do all the hard work. She was sick and tired of being bossed around like disposable objects. She had been so happy when the seniors graduated and they were finally the leaders of the group. She and Aubrey had decided to become co-captains instead of closing one leader for their group. After Aubrey and the puke incident, they were out of members and desperate to get freshmen on their team. During the activities fair on the quad, they had to ask so many girls to join, they couldn’t keep track. Although their determination, not a lot of people seemed to be interested. Chloe had almost given up when a beautiful brunette had walked past, not interested at first, but had taken their flier. She had said that acapella was lame, and that she didn’t even sing. That made Aubrey nearly puke, but Chloe had hope.

One day, she’s taking a shower, actually, hooking up in the shower with her flavor of the month or two, Tom, when she hears Davis Guetta’s Titanium sung by a beautiful voice. She stops mid kiss and walks out of her stall to try to find the owner of her beautiful voice.

“You can sing!” She’s surprised to see the brunette she had just seen at the activities fair in the afternoon.

“Dude!” She closes the curtains, but Chloe opens them back and asks her about how high her belt goes, and about how she should Jon the Bellas.

They sing together, and Chloe leaves the brunette’s shower stall with her boy toy. What she realizes is that she gad forgotten to ask her her name. All she had managed to see was the brunettes initials on her wrist, which had her initials, CB.

The day of the audition comes, and the brunette decides to arrive at the audition, and sings a song with cups at the end. She can tell that Aubrey is pissed at the fact that she was the best in all of the auditions, and Chloe convinces Aubrey to let her join the Bellas.

After the audition, she finds out that the brunette’s name is Beca Mitchell from the papers Chloe had asked her to fill out.

Beca Mitchell. Chloe’s already so interested in her.

They start with 10 girls on invitation night. The next day, two girls are dismissed, breaking their Bellas promise of not sleeping with a Treblemaker.

Beca didn’t think that shed be joining a female acapella group, and actually taking part in it. Her dad had told her that if she tried her first year, and she still wanted to become a DJ in LA despite trying hard to participate in college life, that he’d let her. That was the biggest reason that she had joined the Bellas, and second being that Chloe, the girl who had caught her at the activities fair, and barged into her shower, was kind of hot. Maybe some hot girl motivation couldn’t hurt. Right?

After the incident at the Semi-finals of the ICCAs, she was definitely getting banned from the group. They had fallen in third place after Beca had sung bulletproof during their set. Aubrey had gotten angry, and she had gotten accused of sleeping with Jesse by her. She was for sure banned from the group.

Thats what she thought, when she got a message from Chloe during the break. The Bellas were back in the Finals, and that she wanted Beca to join the practice on Monday. She thought she was going to be banned, so the message took her by surprise, but talking it through with her dad, she had decided she would go back to practice.

She walks into the auditorium 15 minutes late, when Aubrey is puking her head off, and all the girls are trying to get ahold of the pitch pipe.

She stops the whole argument, and the group shares an amazing moment and the next second, Aubreys tossing her pitch pipe over to Beca. She mis-catches it, and it lands in the pile of puke. Gross.

They head to the pool and have an impromptu mashup session where they find their harmony. They all hug, and Beca somehow catches a glance at Chloes wrist, which says BM. She tries to shake it off of her mind, but she fails.

Chloe had a BM on her wrist, and Beca has a CB. Could this mean that they could be soulmates? But Chloe hasn’t ever said that she was gay, and didn’t she have a boyfriend in the shower that day?

Beca tries to forget.

She really tries.

Beca didn’t believe in soulmates. At least that’s what she had thought. Right?

When she gets back to her dorm after practice one day, she tries to work on her mixes. She can’t seem to concentrate on anything. Chloe had looked at her more than usual, and Beca was getting nervous. Did she have something to say to her? Had she done something wrong?

Thats when she gets a knock on the door. Its usually Kimmy-Jin’s friends, so she lets the girl answer it, but to her surprise, what she hears next is a voice that belongs to Chloe.

“Hey Beca. Can I talk to you for a second?” She asks, and Beca looks at her from her desk.

“Yeah. Sure. What’s up?”

Chloe frowns, “Outside maybe?” Beca nods, getting up and walking out the room.

“What’s up?” Beca asks the ginger as she walks down the hall, and out the door, and she knows she’s heading to the Bellas house. The Bellas had a house, the house Tri Delta had used before moving to a new buildings. It was basically a sorority house, and they were allowed to move in from sophomore year.

“What’s up with you? You’re acting strange lately. “ Chloe says to her.

Beca shrugs. “Its nothing. N-nothing in general. “ She answers nervously.

“You saw my initials didn’t you?”

Shit. Had Chloe seen her that night?

“You did, huh?” Chloe says turning her wrist to show Beca. “Look, I saw yours in the shower that day. CB. Right?”

Beca nods, a bit more comfortable.

“And you’ve been thinking about this, correct?” She asks her. Beca nods again. “That we have each other’s initials.”

“I don’t even believe in soulmates…..”Beca mutters, looking into Chloe’s eyes.

“They don’t have to be relationships, you know.”

“Yeah, have you seen anyone with a soulmate friendship? They always end up dating, or getting married, or whatever. “Beca scoffs.

Chloe doesn’t say anything. She can’t find anything to say. She tries, but no words come out.

“See. And I don’t believe in this whole soulmates bullshit anyways. Can I go now?” She doesn’t wait for Chloes answer, and just leaves the building, leaving Chloe behind her. She doesn’t know why her aches so much, but she pushes her feelings down, and goes back to her room, crawls into bed, and lets her tears shed. Why was she crying right now?

Chloe stands there in silence, not being able to say anything. She doesn’t know how long she’s just standing in the doorway, until Aubrey comes back from her meeting with her professor.

“God, Chloe. You almost gave me a heart attack. Chloe? Chloe!” She holds on to her shoulder and shakes her.

“Huh? Oh, it’s nothing. I’m just a bit tired.” She shakes it off, trying to escape from Aubrey’s tightening grip on her shoulders.

“Oh bullcrap. I know you so well Chloe.” She scoffs. “What’s wrong Chloe? Is it Tom? Because if he’s hurting you, I swear to god Chloe, I’m gonna kill him….”

“No no. It’s not Tom.”

“What is it then? Its Beca isn’t it? Oh my god Chloe. It is! What happened with ear monstrosities?”

“Nothing. Can you leave me alone?” She runs up to her room and slams the door shut, and bursting into tears. Why did she have to be like that to Aubrey? She knows she shouldn’t have, and she’s regretting it so much. And she shouldn’t have confronted Beca. Now she had ruined her relationship with Beca and Aubrey.

Somehow, she’s managed to fall asleep, and she’s woken up with a gentle knock on the door. “Chloe. I’m sorry about earlier. Can I come in?” She hears Aubrey’s voice. She gets out of bed, and opens the door.

“Chloe I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have stepped in. I just don’t want you to get hurt, you know.” She say, giving her a hug.

“I know Bree.” She sighs, burying her face in Aubrey’s shoulder.

“Do you like her Chloe?”Aubrey asks, and she doesn’t even need to answer. “I know Chloe. It’s okay.” She rubs her back as Chloe sobs into her shoulder.

Beca ’s about to miss two days of classes when her father comes in to her room. “Beca. Wake up. Beca?”

She flutters her eyes open. “Huh?”

“Beca. What’s wrong? I know you’re upset at me but you’re upset for a whole another reason. What’s up?”He asks.

“NOthinggggg. Just some soulmate bullshit.”

“Beca, are we talking about me and your mother, because…” He tries to start but Beca intervenes.

“No. It’s not about you and mom or you and Sheila. It’s about my soulmate. That is, if there is even one anymore.” She scoffs.

“Who do you think it is?”

“Chloe.”

“Chloe in the Bellas. Chloe Beale?” He opens his eyes wide. “Oh Beca. That’s great!”

“No it isn’t. I just messed up our whole friendship. I just yelled at her and ran off.” She says looking down.

“Oh Beca, go talk to her. You might even find out that she’s not even your soulmate.” He says patting her on her shoulder. “Now go talk to her or go to your philosophy class.” He says to her and leaves the room.

Now Beca had no choice. She had to go see Chloe. Right? She gets up, takes a shower and gets ready to head to the auditorium to find Chloe.

Chloe decided that she would keep skipping practice until she was okay, and that probably meant for eternity. That’s why she’s surprised, when she hears a knock at the door. It couldn’t be anyone other than Aubrey, right? But Aubreys at practice right now, and she always texts before she comes back, asking if she needed anything from the mini-mart. That meant someone else was at the door. Right? What if its a…..

“Chloe?” The door opens and Chloe jumps, but there she is, Beca Mitchell, standing in front of the doorway of Chloe’s room.

“Oh my god Beca! You’re gonna give me a heart attack!” She says now trying to calm herself down. Her heart was pounding and it didn’t seem to stop. Was it her being scared, or was it because Beca’s here?

“I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you. I went to the auditorium, and you weren’t there. Aubrey gave me her keys and told me you were here.” She says as she slowly steps into the room. “I should’ve called. Or whatever….” She mutters, waiting for permission to come into the room. “I needed to talk to you.” Chloe shifts in her bed, making room for Beca to sit, and she takes it as an go sign to walk into the room.

“What’s up?” Chloe says in her most normal-im-okay-but-kinda-not tone.

“Soulmates.” She just says, looking at Chloe.

“Soulmates.” She repeats. “What about them?” She grips her fist tight, nails turning her palms white as she clutches. She’s nervous. She didn’t realize it until now, but she’s nervous. She’s nervous about what Beca is going to say. How it might change their relationship forever. How it might just come crashing down.

“What do you think about them? Do you believe in it?” Beca pauses. “Do you think we are?”

She’s been waiting for her to say this to hear her say it. She looks into her eyes. Beca’s beautiful blue eyes are twinkling. her tears are just barely there, right before spilling out of her eyes.

“Beca. I can’t. I can’t anymore…. I can’t pretend like we don’t have chemistry. Like we aren’t meant to be. I can’t do this anymore. Please tell me if I’m crazy, and I’m the only one feeling this between us. Because I’ll stop. I’ll stop if this is just me. So tell me. Am I the only one feeling our chemistry? The way sparks fly when we look at each other, how we slipped into it own world, that days in the shower? Tell me. please….” Chloe lets her tears spill out of her eyes, down her cheeks, and onto the comforter.

“Chloe….” Beca says, looking into her eyes, with her own tears down her cheeks. “I’m messed up. I’m damaged goods. You don’t want me….”

“I do though Beca. I really do. I can’t fight this anymore.”

That moment, no-one really knows what happens, or who kissed who first. It doesn’t matter anymore. Their lips touch, and their hands are around one another, and it’s perfect. No-one could break this moment.

“I love you Beca. I can’t help but love you.” Chloe smiles as she says so, lips still touching.

“I think I love you too Beale.” Beca chuckles.

“You THINK!? Beca THINK!? You don’t love me?” Chloe pouts, jokingly pushing her away.

“Yeah, yeah, fine. I love you Beale. There! Happy?” She says pecking her lip once again.

They’re kissing each other back and fourth, enjoying their moment together when they hear a knock on the door, and then the door opens.

“Finally. What took you so long?” Aubrey chuckles as she looks at them from the doorway.

“Nothing. Beca just had to realize that I was here.”Chloe chuckles as she pokes the younger brunette.

“Heyyyyyy!” Beca pouts, burying her face in Chloe’s hair.

“You two are disgustingly adorable. Don’t hurt her Beca. Or else, I’ll hunt you down and murder you. I’m not kidding.” Aubrey ays as she walks out.

“I love you too!” Chloe giggles kissing Beca’s head. “So are you going to come back to practice now?” She asks as she wraps her arms around Beca and pulls her down to her bed, making them lay down.

“Yeah, I guess so. I mean, you’re gonna drag me to them now right?” Beca asks, lifting her head up, and looking at the ginger’s eyes.

“Yup. That’s totally going to happen. But don’t worry. It’ll be worth it.” She gives a quick peck on the lips. “So, does this mean you’re gonna be mine girlfriend?”

“Um…… I guess?”

“Um… YOU GUESS!? Seriously? Get out of my room!” She jokingly pushes the brunette off of her.

“Sorry! Sorry! I would love to be your girlfriend. “ She says to her, trying to not get pushed off of the bed.

“Awwwww. Yay!” She wraps her arms back around her.

“Love you too. “ Beca says laying back on top of her. She didn’t believe in soulmates before, but now she did, and it’s a good change for her. She knows she’s going to be so much happier, and maybe Barden wasn’t that bad after all.

She then realizes that Chloe’s a senior.

But right now, it doesn’t matter, she presses a gentle kiss on the ginger’s lips and closes her eyes, falling asleep.

#bechloe #soulmates au #pitch perfect fan drive #I didn't know how to end it #I tried #please forgive me #I hope y'all enjoy it #ppfandomdrive

54 notes · View notes

jtsfavslut · 4 years

Text

✧ 𝔥𝔢𝔞𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔯 ✧

Description: Inspired by the song ‘Heather’ by Conan Gray.

Warning: Suicidal Talk

Word Count: 1.2k+

*THE THIRD OF DECEMBER*

"21 more days till' Christmas eve, I can't wait," Grayson excitedly beamed at you.

"Me too, but I can't wait for winter to be over," you smiled back at him, rubbing your clothed arms trying to create some sort of heat, as your long-sleeved, yet thin shirt managed to provide you with no source of heat.

"Here," Grayson said handing you his sweater that he had on, it was a plain black, crew neck kind of sweater.

"Thank you Gray, but your going to get cold, or worst, sick," you pouted at him as he was left in a black long sleeve shirt.

"It's looks better on you than me anyways, plus I'm used to the cold," he smiled at you making you blush. Luckily for you, your cheeks were already cold from the breeze hitting your face.

"And am I, we've lived here our entire lives duh," she playfully rolled your eyes, and turned around to lean your body on the railing, looking at the green pines ahead of you.

You and the Dolan siblings were known for being extremely close, however, you and Grayson however, were inseparable. If Grayson got invited to anything, you would come along, and vise-versa.

And of course, you caught feeling for your hot best-friend who happens to live across from you, you kept it to yourself, not wanting to jeopardize anything.

"I can't believe we're going to be seniors next year," Grayson sighed as you softly nodded your head.

"Me neither," you whispered. You're head making up scenarios about how would it be if you finally dated him during senior year.

"Y/N, Gray, mom said to come inside because it's getting cold," Ethan said through the door, making you and Grayson walk back inside.

The warm heat making your skin get that weird feeling everything the temperature changes suddenly.

"Go lay in my bed, I'll bring some hot chocolate and we can watch movies, yeah?" Grayson asked making your heart do cartwheels.

You nodded your head and made your way to the bedroom that you've spent many nights in.

You wished you could stop being a pussy and tell him that you love him. But the fear of rejection, humiliation, and loss scared you to death. You we'rent scared of anything. Except one thing.

And that being loosing Grayson, he was the only person you truly loved, the only one you would die for.

Grayson was always there for you. Everything your parents yelled at you for making a little mistake like accidentally spilling a bit of whatever on the table, your first crush-rejection, and especially your parents getting more toxic.

He knew you more than you knew yourself. Yet he was oblivious to the fact that you were madly in love with him.

"Extra whipped cream, just how you always get it," his voice suddenly spoke making you flinch.

"Thank you," you whispered while smiling, reaching up and grabbing the cup from him.

"You're awfully quiet today. What's up?" he asked making your shoulders tense.

"Umm, nothing, I'm OK. Just thinking about something," you shrugged, sipping on the hot drink that he made you, making your insides warm up.

"Thinking about what?" he asked and you thought of something to say.

'How I'm madly in love with you,' you thought to yourself, but managed to lie and say that it's about graduation. Of course he believed you, since you've been worrying about that lately.

*THE TWELVE OF DECEMBER*

"I'm staying after school today," your soft voice spoke as you stood with Grayson and Ethan by your lockers.

"You want me to wait for you?" He asked as you shook your head smiling.

"I'll walk home, you can go with E," you told he as frowned. "It's cold, you could get sick. I'll go with E, then come pick you up." He shrugged as Ethan nodded.

"Yeah you could get sick, and it's gonna snow later." Ethan said agreeing with his brother.

"Fine, I'll text you when it's done," you sighed.

"I'm gonna blast, and get lunch." Ethan said and walked away.

"So I was thinking that for our friendvesarry we could go to the skating rink on Satur-," you began saying but stopped as you noticed he wasn't paying attention to you.

You followed his eyes trying to find what had managed to catch his attention.

His eyes followed her until she was out of sight. Her blonde hair bouncing on her shoulder with every step she took.

"I'm sorry, what?" He asked turning to look at you again.

"Nothing, it wasn't important." You whispered with a ting of hurt in your voice.

"Oh ok," he answered confused but let it be.

"I'm gonna go to library, wanna come?" You asked him.

"I have something to do, but I'll meet you before class starts ok?" He asked and you nodded your head.

And as you walked to library by yourself, Grayson went to go find her.

And as you found a new book to read, Grayson found a new date for Saturday.

Saturday being the 14th of December. The day you two met 13 years ago.

While that day meant everything to you, it seemed like it managed to escape from his mind.

"When are you gonna tell my brother?" a very familiar voice spoke scarring you and making you look up from the book you were reading.

Ethan.

"I'm sorry, what?" you said taking off your fake reading glasses. A habit you picked up while reading.

"That you're in love with him. I know you are Y/N," he said sitting down next to you.

"I am not. I don't know what you're talking about," you denied and put your glasses back on, and going back to your book, before he snatched it.

"Y/N, I know when you lie. We all know you are." he spoke making you sigh.

"OK, so what if I am. He doesn't love me in that way. He likes her. Her eyes are brighter than a blue sky, her blonde her makes my black one look dead. He's mesmerized by Heather, Ethan. He likes her, not me," you spoke while tears clouded your vision.

"You still have to tell him, before you, uhh- before you go," he spoke as his eyes also filled with tears because of what he was referring to.

"He doesn't know Ethan," you groaned.

"You have to tell him, it'll be better. If you don't tell him, it's going to destroy him." he cried. Thank god no one was around.

"How do you tell the person you're in love with that you’re going away because you tried to kill yourself. How do you even tell them that you're trying to kill yourself?" you calmly asked as he shook his head.

"He kissed me Ethan. He kissed me and apologized and said that he didn't mean for that to happen. He said to act like it never happened." you softly cried while shaking your head.

He stayed quiet so you took it as a cue to continue talking. You took off your glasses placing them on the table.

"I won't tell him, he's happy with her, I'm going away. He'll be find without me, he doesn't need me, and neither does you or anyone else. I'll start a new life, somewhere else but here. He'll date her and they'll be happy. You'll find someone else and be happy. Me? I don't know what happiness is, but I hope I'll find it." you said getting up.

"Think of this as a fresh start or reset. Please give this him. I'm leaving in two hours so I better get home," you whispered as tears raced down your face.

"I love you Ethan, never forget that. I love all the time I spent with you guys. You guys saved me, but I need to save myself now," you handed him the letter and left.

And you ran home, took all your stuff and left to the airport.

You wanted to go to New York, but that was close, too close. Florida was not for you, so LA was the only option.

As cliche as it sounds, LA does give people opportunities, and being all the way across the country sounded good.

And while you got in the plane, Grayson opened the letter that you gave him. Screaming at Ethan for not telling earlier, giving you a chance to stop you.

Dear Grayson,

By the time you're reading this, if Ethan gave it to you when I asked him to, I should be on a plane, headed somewhere far.

As you may know, my love for poetry, has given me the talent to express my feelings in a more soft cleaner way, the poem below will explain everything that's been going through my mind recently.

I still remember Third of December

Me in your sweater You said it looked better

On me, than it did you Only if you knew

How much I liked you But I watch your eyes, as she

Walks by What a sight for Sore eyes

Brighter than a Blue sky

She's got you Mesmerized

While I dieWhy would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half, as pretty

You gave her your sweater It's just polyester, but you like her better Wish I were Heather

Watch as she stands with Her holding your hand

Put your arm 'round her shoulder Now I'm getting colder

But how could I hate her? She's such an angel

But then again, kinda Wish she were dead, as she

Walks by

If you know me, you know exactly what this means.

I love you Gray, and not in a friendly way, I love you as in I want to be in a relationship and share everything with you.

But that doesn't matter anymore. I just had to say it, and I'm not scared of anything, only loosing you. But I was going to loose you anyways, so I wrote it on paper.

I want to thank you for everything that you've done for me.

I want you to forget about me, about our friendship. About our friendship. I want you, and Ethan, to start fresh, to go out there and explore the world.

I want you and Heather, or any other girl to be happy. I want you to be happy and for someone to make you happy and to give you everything you deserve and vice-versa.

As for me, I'm going to cherish everything we've done together. Every movie we've watched, every hugged we've shared, and every second.

Make sure to tell mama Lisa that I love her and that was she the mother I needed. And tell her that I moved for some program or something, you're smart and creative so you'll make something up.

I love you Gray <3

- Y/N.

"YOU KNEW DIDN'T YOU? YOU KNEW SHE WAS LEAVING AND DIDN'T TELL ME?" Grayson angrily shouted at Ethan as hot tears streamed down his face.

"She needs this Gray. We'll find her, I don't know where she went but we'll find her,"Ethan sighed trying to comfort his brother.

"I love her Ethan and now she's gone. How come I didn't notice?" He cried.

"I love you Gray," you whispered to yourself as your plane took off.

PART TWO

#grayson dolan #graysonbailey #grayson x reader #graysonsmut #grayson dolangrayson dolan imaginegrayson dolan fanfictiongrayson dolan drabblegrayson dolan blurbgrayson dolan fanficethan dolanethan dolan #ethangrant #ethan dolan #grayson blurb

55 notes · View notes

madamewriterofwrongs · 4 years

Note

62 of the sensory prompts!

I hope you enjoy <3

Sensory Prompts

62. Fingertips smudged in blue ink

Bear my Signature

2008

His hands were steady as he bent over the recruitment table, sure in the path he was setting himself on. This was his decision, not his father’s. Shannon was proud of him; his parents were proud of him – he was proud of himself. Nothing could make him change his mind.

Then why did he hesitate over the final signature?

One last scrawl of his name and he would be a new Sixty-eight Whiskey recruit with the United States Armed Forces, with a career and a future serving his country and doing something of use – for once.

He couldn’t keep working for his father, long hours of travel, barked orders, and n real choice. Working with his hands was one thing, but this would be so much more.

He was going to make something of himself.

All he had to do was sign on the bottom line and his life would change forever. He thought of Shannon. They hadn’t been together long enough to know what time and distance would do to them, but he loved her; and she loved him. That would be enough.

He could do this.

He would do this.

He had to do this.

Eddie’s hands shook as his pen danced over his last key to freedom.

2010

He had been staring at the page for hours. It was a good program – it should be for the amount of money his parents were paying (he could hear his mother’s voice echoing in his ears). He wanted to be here. Sure, he wasn’t overly enthusiastic about his field of study but it would open up a lot of doors if he could be at least a B student.

He wouldn’t have to live at home any more, that was a definite plus. There was a great love he had for his parents when he didn’t have to see them every day.

Distance makes the heart grow fonder.

Or forgetful.

Either way, this college would be the perfect opportunity to go out on his own and make something of himself. So what, if it was only a few hours away from home and his parents were paying for everything? He was still an independent person of independent means; he would finally have something to contribute. He’d be doing something of use – for once.

So what, if he hated the program? So what, if he was still staring at that map of the known world he got on his seventh grade trip to the museum?

This would be how he would make his mark on the world; it was his only option.

Buck placed his signature on the final page and handed the pile of forms back to the registration office.

2010

Eddie had never felt so panicked in his entire life (apart from the time two months ago when he’d called his girlfriend in the middle of the night and asked her to marry him when he was in town on leave). That had been a different kind of panic.

The panic brought on from calling his parents the day before and telling them that Shannon was pregnant and he had no idea what to do. After a lot of cursing and a lot of lecturing, they told him that there was only one option available to him: marry the girl.

They never liked Shannon. They tolerated her – were polite to her whenever Eddie brought her around – but the sneer in his mother’s voice when she told him what an idiotic mistake he’d made, reminded him that this would be the only way his parents approved of him marrying his high school sweetheart.

He’d always thought he’d get around to marrying her eventually. Sure, they’d only dated for a few months in her last year of high school but that still counted as a teenage romance where he was from. It was romantic right?

And then she’d told him she was pregnant, and then he’d panicked and begged her to marry him.

And now they were walking down the aisle in front of their friends and family (who were available to fly out at a moment’s notice), saying their vows like they actually meant them.

To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, till death do us part.

Eddie smudged the ink of his signature as he marked the marriage certificate, a reminder of the familiar yet uncharted path his life was currently on.

2011

Eddie never believed in love at first sight, but holding that little boy in his arms changed everything. Christopher Ramon Diaz, born 4lbs, 9oz. The doctors assured them that he was a little small but perfectly healthy and safe. That was all he needed to hear.

He hadn’t stopped smiling since they brought Shannon and Christopher to their room so mom and the baby could rest.

Mom.

Shannon was a mother now. The mother of his child.

He was a father. How the hell was he going to be a dad when his own had kept him at a distance his entire life? Not that he blamed him – he was providing for his family – that’s what you do. That’s why he was serving out the rest of his tour and coming straight home to look for a job.

He hated that he wouldn’t get to spend more than a week with his wife (the mother of his child) and newborn son, but that was the deal he made:

Put food on the table, keep a roof over their heads, and you will be a family forever.

At least he was around long enough to sign his name on the dotted line, declaring this little boy his for anyone to see. Christopher looked so much like his mother, he prayed he wouldn’t stay away long enough to become a stranger in his eyes. He wanted every moment he could get.

Eddie was going to be a good father; he would fight for them, and when he came back, he would work a million jobs so he could keep their deal. So long as the two of them were happy, nothing else mattered.

2014

Buck was floating, restless, in a sea of uncertainty. To be specific, he was floating in Moloaʻa Bay, just north of Kauaʻi, watching a group of men performing professional grade dives further out. They worked in sync but came up splashing and laughing, hearty laughs of grown men (not boys who had no idea what they were doing with their lives).

He’d spoken to them the night before when they stumbled into the bar he’d found himself sitting at most nights, striking up a conversation about how they all ended up on this island paradise.

He vaguely remembered coming up with some story about following a girl here only to have her ditch him for another man. It sounded better than telling them, he’d shown up at the airport in Seattle and asked for the cheapest, earliest flight and somehow ended up here.

Their story had been much more interesting anyways. Naval SEALS, honorable and strong. They were attending a conference by day (who got to go to a conference in Kauaʻi?) but the nights were all for them.

Buck blushed, remembering how bright the youngest one, Jacob, had smiled at him over their fifth shot of rum – or was it their eighth? Either way, they’d woken up tangled in each other’s arms somewhere around 6am, when Jake kicked him out so he could get ready for his meeting.

Now, he watched them all, wondering what it must be like to have that kind of comradery, that kind of purpose – that kind of freedom.

That night at the bar, Buck found Jake again and followed him back to his hotel room so he could register for their mailing list of interested applicants (he didn’t ask to stay).

The next time he was in Coronado, he’d have a new career opportunity and – hopefully – a new life.

2015

Eddie hated his signature. On a good day, it was a series of loops strung together with an E and D sloppily thrown in.

On a bad day, it was the end of a long series of papers that meant he was being discharged from the army with honors. For being brave, he wouldn’t have to fight anymore.

He didn’t feel brave. He certainly didn’t feel like he was done fighting.

And yet here he was, standing in front of a General he’d never met, having to hide the tremor in his hand as he struggled to sign off on his emancipation from the only real thing he’d ever known.

He had a wife and a son back home who didn’t know him any more – it wasn’t a stretch to say he no longer knew himself. But they needed him. They needed his money and his leadership and he didn’t have much of either. He had no way of knowing what he was coming home to (and didn’t that just sting?). Having no idea what was going on with his own family because he was gone for too long. What good was he to them now that he was back, though? He still had months of recovery ahead of him, and a few scars that opened up into a chasm of nightmares every night. All he wanted to do was take a deep breath a scream.

But he couldn’t do that.

He could salute with his good hand, and thank the man for the box that said he was a hero, and go back to his family.

And keep trying to hold it together.

2016

So being a SEAL hadn’t been the dream he imagined it to be. He still gained some valuable skills when it came to search and rescue, and combat. He also learned about the type of job he didn’t want to have.

He wanted the life they had on the brochure:

Help save lives.

Do some good.

Be a daredevil.

So they hadn’t said those exact words but that was the implication. It was implied that he’d get to be a badass rulebreaker with a heart of gold.

He shuffled out of the facility with a few new bruises and a new respect for being a decent human being for once.

Whether by coincidence of providence, he found himself wandering around the streets of Los Angeles nearly every night after he arrived, searching for some sort of sign that this was the place to be at this moment in time. If it wasn’t, he could always move on to the next place. But there was something about LA that felt right. Hot sun, hot people, lots of mischief and adventure.

A boy could become a man here.

He was stopped on the street as the fire station in front of him roared to life, and he watched through the window as men and women worked in tandem to load their gear and peel away from the hangar. 30 seconds of excitement suddenly left the building feeling empty enough for Buck to hear his own heart pick up.

Before he knew what he was doing, he walked up to the main door and rang the bell. A man in a uniformed t-shirt and pants answered, and invited him inside to tell him all about the exciting life as a Los Angeles Firefighter.

For the second time in his life, Buck left his name and number with a strange man, hoping this single interaction would change his life.

2017

Eddie took a deep breath; not screaming, this time, but exhaling the last of his nerves. This felt right. This was his decision, not his father’s – in fact, his father had no qualms about showing his disapproval at his decision.

But it felt right.

Being a firefighter was a lot like combat (with an eighth of the on-the-job stressors). But he still got to help people – he could use his skills he’d learned in the army to save lives at home the way he hoped he was doing overseas. And he could come home to his son every night.

He would have come home to Shannon, too, if he could get her on the phone for more than a few minutes at a time.

He hadn’t spoken with her in over a year, now. She’d stopped answering so he’d stopped calling and only part of his heart was broken for knowing that she’d run away, too.

Even if it was just him and Christopher for a little while, it would be still be a blessing to go save the world and be back in time for dinner (usually).

He was so tired lately. Working three jobs left him no energy to be with his son and even less desire to argue with his parents over how to best raise him.

Christopher needed stability, so he’d give it to him. He’d become a firefighter for whoever would take this mess of a human being, and build the life for his son that he deserved – a happy one.

Even if he wondered twelve times a day if a happy life was really a life with him. Maybe Christopher would be better off with his parents. He barely knew the little boy sleeping in his own bed and not a crib.

Isn’t that all the more reason to stay?

Before Eddie could second guess himself, he signed his name on the dotted line, and joined the row of recruits for the fire academy training.

2017

As far as first dates went, this one was strangely not the worst. That had involved jumping out the second story window of an apartment complex because her “technically still my boyfriend” was coming through the front door.

He’d twisted his ankle when his leg got caught on the fire escape and the police were called – though, thankfully, no charges were laid. Incredibly painful, and incredibly embarrassing.

Waking up in the hospital after his girlfriend had performed an emergency tracheotomy, was a very close second.

Unlike that awful first date, though. Abby was still at his side when he woke up. He hadn’t realized how long it had been since he’d had someone to wake up next to – even if it was groggily coming off anesthesia after surgery.

It was nice.

She was nice.

God, he liked her so much. Why couldn’t the universe let him have one good date? He hadn’t had that many to begin with, was it so much to ask that things go right?

Abby was nice and smart and beautiful and liked him.

And she stayed.

She was at work when he signed himself out of the hospital but Bobby had been there, too, to drive him home since his car was still at the restaurant. They even went out for breakfast. That was new as well. Someone who willingly spent time with him and offered him advice and cared whether Buck took that advice.

He’d be lying if he said it wasn’t a little addictive:

Having people in his life who stayed.

2018

Carla had to slap his hand during their tour of the school every time he tried to play with the lanyard around his neck. He managed to stop fidgeting after the first fifteen minutes, but the nerves never faded.

This was a huge risk. It was still early in the school year, but Christopher had just moved to LA. He had no friends, no social circle, no one outside of his family; and now Eddie wanted to move him to a highly specialized school.

What, just because it had small class sizes, and teachers who seemed to understand his son’s needs, and had incredible security measures, and was an opportunity for Christopher to get a better education than he had back in Texas, and it felt like a miracle that Carla convinced the school to see him on such short notice?

It was still an incredibly expensive miracle.

And there was the problem of getting a hold of Shannon. He’d told their lawyer when he was taking Christopher out of the state, and thankfully, her number hadn’t changed, but getting her to pick up the phone when he called his estranged wife had been an exercise in anxiety control.

If it meant that Christopher got the best care, nothing else mattered.

Even as his thought swam with a thousand unanswered questions (the loudest one being: what did that kiss in the parking lot mean for us?), Eddie’s hand was sure and still as he signed the registration form.

2019

Maddie was back in his life. He’d almost lost Maddie a few months after getting her back, but now that wouldn’t be a problem anymore. She was safe, and she was home with him; he had his big sister once again and that was all he needed.

It didn’t stop the nightmares from bolting him awake, reminding him that he could die tomorrow and then she’d be left alone. Or she could leave again and then he’d be alone.

He didn’t want that: he didn’t want to be alone again. He liked the people in his life. Maddie, Bobby, the 118, Eddie, Christopher; they were people he wanted to keep safe.

But the dangers he needed to protect them from weren’t always solved with a giant water hose or an axe. For everything else, he called a lawyer and got some advice.

Maddie had been very understanding when he told her about the will he planned to change so she’d receive a larger piece of his assets. She was his sister, he was always going to leave something to her, but now that she was back, he wanted to know that she’d be happy here without him in this place he’d convinced her to settle.

Eddie had been less understanding; grateful, yes, but speechless as to why Buck would want to leave his colleague so much (it was mostly for Christopher, he explained, so that he’d could have something for his future if he lost his best buddy). That had still led to a lot of protesting – eventually broken up by a confused by thankful Shannon – but nothing was compared to Bobby.

Bobby who teared up when Buck explained that he didn’t have a lot of things in this world, but if anything happened to him, he wanted Bobby to have something to remember him by.

That hadn’t been a lie, but maybe not a whole truth.

He wanted to know that the people he loved most were never left alone even after he left them.

Was that so much to ask for?

2019

Eddie hated funerals. He didn’t know a single person who enjoyed them; but he’d been to far too many in his short life to find any comfort in them.

They were burying his wife today.

She didn’t want to be his wife anymore but he hadn’t told anyone that. The shame that burned his throat when he thought of revealing that painful truth, was too sharp. He suffered in silence as he always had. It wasn’t just his own feelings he had to worry about; there was Christopher.

There was always Christopher – there would always be Christopher – he would never stop caring for his son as long as he lived (and probably long after as well). Because that’s what parents were supposed to do.

He found himself standing, poised with pen in hand over another piece of paper, frozen once again by his own indecision and fear.

What was he supposed to write in the book of her life? How was he meant to say goodbye to the only woman he’d ever loved? How could he close this chapter of his life with a flick of ink?

He couldn’t.

His eyes hooked onto his son’s back, sitting quietly beside his great grandmother, swinging his legs under the pews because he still wasn’t tall enough to touch the ground. He was so small; so young.

Christopher needed him to be strong; needed him to put it away so they could take care of each other.

Eddie signed the front page, and opened the book for the guests to sign.

2019

When Buck woke up in the hospital this time, he saw an angel, and for a moment he was terrified; but then everything was at peace.

The moments after he felt peace, however, were agonizing and terrifying. The moments before hadn’t been a picnic either, but at least his memories of laying underneath a ladder truck and being pulled to safety were still a little hazy. He remembered a warm hand in his and a few words of encouragement and a lot of screaming, but not much else.

Now that he was awake, fear was quickly becoming his only focus. The fear of not knowing whether the surgery had been successful – not knowing if he’d ever work again or if he’d have to start his life over. The fear of whether he would be the same man if he ever could go back to work. So much was uncertain, that he clung to the tiniest bit of hope: Ali, Maddie, and Carla. The women who would stay by his side no matter what.

It took him four days before he had the strength to walk to the end of the hall, and finally, the doctor was satisfied that the was safe to go home. He had never been happier being wheeled out to his sister’s car, than the day he got to sign himself out of the hospital, knowing that everything would be back to normal.

2019

Buck was man enough to admit that this punishment was nothing compared to what it could be. Three hours in the human resources office with Bobby, Chief Alonso and Alex, head of HR, signing his name to a million forms, could have been a lot worse.

Sure, his hand cramped about half an hour in, but it was worth it all if it meant he could finally go back to work.

It all seemed a little silly – not that he’d ever say that out loud. Buck had no intention of suing the city or the department (or Bobby) again. He’d meant what he said, though: he was a fighter. He’d fight for his job and his family however he could.

Sometimes he fought in really stupid ways that he didn’t realize were harmful until it was too late. But then he’d just have to fight to make up for those mistakes.

Buck was a fighter, plain and simple.

Tonight, he’d fight through hand cramps and eye fatigue. Tomorrow he’d fight for his friends’ trust.

And pray it was enough for them to let him come home.

2022

There was one recorded day of history in which Eddie Diaz felt happier than he did today: the day his son was born.

Nothing else compared to that day, vowing his fealty to Christopher and whatever he needed.

Today was a pretty good day, though.

He was dressed a lot nicer, that was for certain – not that he didn’t love the sea green scrubs, but a fitted suit was much more comfortable.

The company was also pretty good.

Christopher stood beside him in the mirror, adjusting his tie for the tenth time (even though Abuela told him to stop playing with it). He understood that the boy was nervous so he only smiled down at him and his slightly crooked tie.

There was a knock at the door and Eddie hurried to answer it, knowing exactly who would be on the other side.

Buck hadn’t stopped smiling since he arrived at the rental hall, taking all of Maddie’s teasing as she helped him dress for his big day. Nothing could dampen his mood; not the caterers calling in with last minute substitutions, not baby Gloria throwing up on Chimney all night, not a small tear in his suit jacket that neither of them could fix.

None of it mattered as he knocked on the door of the side room they’d set up.

Technically, he wasn’t supposed to see the groom before the wedding – but technically they weren’t supposed to sleep together the night before either, so one more break in tradition wouldn’t be the end of the world. Since the day they moved in together, Buck had never willingly spent a night away from their bed. Even on the nights when they were irreconcilably fighting, they’d sleep on opposite sides of the bed.

He was not about to sleep without his fiancé on the last night he got to call him his fiancé.

Eddie and Buck walked down the hallway to greet the officiant, Maddie waiting for them with two pens in hand.

This was it; the last step before they officially tied the knot. Everything after this was just icing on the cake (which reminded Buck, he needed to tell Eddie about the catering mishap after everything was sorted because he was more likely to panic). This was the moment where they would sign their names and be legally bound in the eyes of the world, as two people who wanted to spent their lives together.

Eddie was careful with his penmanship. His hands didn’t shake much – absolutely confident in this choice – but he wanted it to be perfect. This would be the last time he would sign his name on a piece of paper like this (and he wouldn’t sign his name on a book for others to impart their memories of his dearly departed for a very long time); so he savored every little detail as he lent his name to another cause he believed in wholeheartedly.

Buck laughed when he messed up the B in “Buckley” after spending hours for weeks on end, practicing his “Diaz”s. It turned into a strange series of vertical loops that someone could use in context to describe as a B, so he wasn’t too worried. In fact, he had no worries at all. Now, he had a happy memory attached to signing away his life to a man he hoped to know better with every passing day.

#cj writes things #cj answers things #love zee #zeethebooknerd #buddie #911 fox #911 fic #buddie fic #history of signatures

31 notes · View notes

honeyjaez · 4 years

Text

A solo stan who is thinking about checking other groups out?

There is nothing wrong with being a solo stan (as in only liking 1 group) as long as you are kind and courteous to other groups.

Also this post might not be for you.

But if you are a solo stan (usually starting with BTS) or just in need of finding new groups and thinking about spreading your wings here are some suggestions. 🙂

When I first got into kpop way back in the 2010 years I had no clue what I had stumbled on and I only liked 2 groups max for the longest time because I didnt know about any other groups. Since then I’ve come to love so many groups that I wish I knew about sooner.

Now mind you. I am primarily a boy group stan so there are not a lot of girl groups on her so please forgive me. -*edit I’ve decided to do a part 2 of just girl groups so stay tuned

This is also under the impression you already know BTS and their brother group TXT.

also if your fav is not on this list I dearly apologize. I picked groups that might be a good intro to like multiple groups.

Groups down below ˅˅˅˅

SEVENTEEN:

-13 Member group under Pledis Entertainment.

- Debuted May 26, 2015

-Popular in Korea and slowly gaining popularity internationally.

-AMAZING dancers.

-Like the synchronization is unreal for 13 people.

- Divided into 3 sub-units; Performance Unit, Hip-Hop Unit, and Vocal Unit

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Don’t Wanna Cry. Hit, Clap

iKON:

-Currently a 6 Member group under YG Entertainment

-Debuted September 15th, 2015

-Addicting Chorus’s and bad ass rapping

-Their Leader B.I recently left the group early this year, but fans are hopeful for a reunion. But that doesn’t mean you can’t appreciate OT7 right now.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Bling Bling, Love Scenario, B-Day

ONEUS:

-6 Member group under RBW Entertainment

-Debuted January 9th, 2019.

-They are a crazy good for a rookie group and have a lot of bangers.

-Their choreography is no joke

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Valkyrie (Debut song), Twilight, Lit

(Seriously they have no bad songs)

NCT 127:

(NCT is actually a massive group divided up into sub-units)

-10 Member group under SM Entertainment.

-Debuted July 10th, 2016

-Crazy Powerful dance moves.

-Look mean, but are actually sweethearts.

-Gaining popularity in the west.

-Some songs to introduce you to them:Cherry Bomb, Touch, Highway to Heaven

NCT Dream:

-Currently a 6 member group under SM Entertainment

-Debuted August 24th, 2016

-Cute Charm and Powerful stage presence.

-NCT Dream is as this moment not a fixed unit and based on idols age.

-When they get old enough the members “graduate” and join other NCT sub-units

-Mark of NCT 127 was once the leader but he reached the age limit and “Graduated” and thus no longer apart of the group.

-Many fans detest this concept and wish SM to make them a fixed unit but that doens’t mean you can’t love OT6 or OT7 at the moment.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Boom, We Go Up, Go

Stray Kids:

-8 member group under JYP Entertainment

-Debuted March 25th, 2018

-Gained a lot of popularity through their survival show of the same name

-Strong and Meaningful songs that deal a lot with self struggle and depression.

-All songs are produced by members Bang Chan, Changbin and Han who make up the sub-unit 3racha.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Hellavator Levanter, Voices, My Pace, Double Knot, God’s Menu, Back Door (I mean this list can go on and on)

GOT7:

-7 Member group under JYP Entertainment

-Debuted January 16th, 2014

-Another amazing dancing group

-Strong Charisma on stage.

-Variety Kings

-Goofballs

-Some songs to introduce you to them:Hard Carry, Eclipse, You Are

VAV:

-7 Member group under A Team Entertainment

-Debuted October 31st, 2015.

-Severely underrated

-Has lost some members and gains some as well.

-They work super hard year round with hardly and rest.

-Please stan VAV.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: She’s Mine, Poison, Spotlight.

ASTRO:

-6 Member group under Fantagio Entertainment

-Debuted February 23rd, 2016.

-Cute, Charming group.

-The boys are actual angels.

-The group is a breath of fresh air.

-Super Talented.

-Addicting songs that just make you smile

-Can have the same concept as literally any other group but still make it their own.

-Vocals are beyond this world.

-Also just overall very pretty.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: All Night, Blue Flame, Baby, Always You.

The Boyz:

-11 Member group under Cre.Ker Entertainment

-Debuted December 6th, 2017

-A really fun and charming group.

-Their song’s are very addicting

-Dance like songs

-Sweet sweet boys who deserve love.

-Member Hwall left in October of 2019 due to health reasons

-Some songs to introduce you to them: D.D.D, No Air, Giddy Up

Day6:

-5 Member group under JYP Entertainment

-Debuted September 7th, 2015

-An actual band so they don’t dance on stage

-but crazy talented

-Their songs are known to make people feel happier.

-I don’t think it is possible to have a bad Day6 song.

-Jae’s twitter is quite possible my favorite place on this earth.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: I smile. Time of our lives. Colors, I need Somebody. Dance Dance. Literally any of them.

PENTAGON:

-Currently a 9 Member group under Cube Entertainment.

-Debuted October 10th, 2016.

-Also Underrated.

-Such amazing discography.

-UNIQUE VOICES

-Strong vocals and major crackheads

-Went through their survival show “Pentagon Maker” and debuted as 10 members.

-Former Member E’Dawn was basically kicked out of Cube and Pentagon after revealing he was dating label mate HyunA. Fans are still hopeful for an OT10 reunion.

-But we can support OT9 now.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Sha La La, Shine, Like This, Cosmo (Japanese song).

SF9:

-9 Member group under FNC Entertainment

-Debuted October 5th, 2016

-FNC’s first dance boy group.

-SEVERELY UNDERRATED.

-If you want any songs to put on your workout playlist, or just get you hyped then their are your boys.

-AMAZING Dancers.

-They are almost all actors as well. If you watch K-Drama’s you might recognize Chani (their maknae) from widely popular Sky Castle and Rowoon from new K-Drama “Extraordinary You”

-Stan SF9. Stream RPM

-Some songs to introduce you to them: O Sole Mio, RPM, Now or Never, Easy Love

Monsta X

-A SEVEN Member group under Starship Entertainment

-Literally the definition of hard-working.

-Powerful Choreography, crazy stage presence, intense charisma...must I go on.

-Literally deserve the world.

-Were formed through the survival program No Mercy and have not stopped since.

-Their songs are so addicting and on top of that are actual sweethearts.

-Only want to make people smile and feel loved through their music.

-Would possibly die for their fans.

-Okay I’m talking too much.

-Gaining popularity in the Western regions.

-In October of 2019, member Wonho (the orange hair in the gif) left the group due to rumors and lies being spread about him. He didn’t want to hurt Monsta X’s reputation so he left the group but fans have strongly opposed this, fighting for starship to help clear his name and have him return. The protest continues on even after almost a month.

(Trust me, if you knew this group and Wonho, you would understand why fans are opposing this.)

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Follow, Shoot Out, Beautiful, Dramarama, All In, Alligator.

NU’EST:

-5 Member group under Pledis Entertainment

-Debuted March 15th, 2012

-Very unique style and concept with their albums. Sticks to their own specific style.

-Addicting chorus.

-Honey Sweet vocals.

-Had a sub-united called NU’EST W while Minhyun was promoting as a member of Wanna One. (The W stood for ‘Waiting’ which should tell you the type of guys they are).

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Bet Bet, Love Me, Face (Debut Song), Help Me (Nu’est W song).

BTOB:

-7 Member group under Cube Entertainment

-Debuted March 21st, 2012.

-Ballads anyone?

-Are primarily a vocal focus group

-But understandably because BTOB has one of the strongest vocals in Kpop.

-But can also dance.

-Honest to good crack heads

-Variety Kings #2

-Currently 3 members are serving their military service but you can still support them in their quiet time.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: I’ll be your man, Only one for me, Beautiful Pain, Missing You.

ATEEZ:

-8 Member group under KQ Entertainment

-Debuted October 24th, 2018.

-ROOKIE KINGS.

-In their one year so far since debut they have shown the world that they are not a group to underestimate.

-Strong Dancers, powerful choreography.

-Their stage presence is no joke.

-Songs are super addicting and go hard so if you need a workout playlist Ateez is your group.

THE DUALITY OF EACH MEMBER.

-San is Satan in disguise.

-Prepared for debut for a really REALLY long time.

-Already signed up with a US record label.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Wonderland, Pirate King, Treasure, Say My name, Wave. literally any of them.

EXO:

-9 Member group under SM Entertainment

-Debuted April 8th, 2012.

-If you know BTS, you probably know about them.

-But EXO are worth all the hype.

-Korea’s chosen representative (Whether you agree with it or not, it’s true)

-Deadly Stage Presence and Charisma

-Their songs are always iconic.

-Leader Suho just might be god I haven’t figured it out yet.

-As of November 2019, 3 of their members are not promoting with the group. Lay is off promoting solo stuff and stuff in china and america (because SM doesn’t want EXOLS happy) and the other 2 members, Xiumin and D.O are currently serving in the military.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Monster, Love Shot, Lotto, Tempo.

Golden Child

-10 Member group under Woollim Entertainment.

-Debuted August 28th, 2017.

-Underrated group x 10.

-Dancing is on point.

-Stage presence on point

-Hardworking

-cute songs

-They are just charming boys who smile more than the sun i swear.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Wannabe, DamDaDi, Genie, Let Me

A.C.E:

-5 Member group under Beat Interactive

-Debuted May 23rd, 2017

-I literally don’t understand why they are so underrated.

-They have created their own unique style in kpop with a rock vibe that is hardly used in the community.

-POWERFUL dancers.

-Rude as fuck but thats besides the point.

-Another great group if you need workout songs.

-Some songs to introduce you to them: Undercover, Savage, Callin, Take Me Higher.

Other groups that I did not talk about but I think should be mentioned:

-AB6IX

-CIX

-VICTON

-VIXX

-Great Guys

-Infinite

-JBJ95

-Kim Donghan(solo)

N.Flying!

-Noir!!!!!

-Spectrum

407 notes · View notes

the-demi-jedi · 4 years

Text

Hello there! I want to share a story I’ve written for a local short story contest. The topic was “The Last Day on Earth”. I’d love to have some feedback from y’all, so if you could spare twenty minutes, it would be great!

Title: The Last Day Word count: 4200 (appx. six pages) Genre: Thriller, romance, mystery Trigger warning: None that I know of. If you notice something, please let me know! Summary: Dan’s life seems to be perfect with his loving wife, well-paid job and a peaceful home. However, his ideal world has been upset by a message from an unknown sender. Who is the person who seems to be threatening him? And is Dan himself the person he believes he is?

The story is a translation from Czech to English, some errors are possible probable :)

Continue reading below!

I know that not many people say this, but I really love my life.

It's already getting dark outside and I finally see my home in the distance. With a smile on my lips, I start to stride towards it faster than I already do. Today was one of the days where I had to visit my workplace personally, as I usually work from home. The genetic lottery rewarded me with a talent for learning languages, including those used for programming, so I make my living as a translator and a programmer. Since I work in two fields, I always have a commission to work on and I can't complain about money - it's enough for me to live comfortably and to the fullest.

I open the wicket in our fence and walk through the garden, beautiful and manicured thanks to my wife's almost motherly care. I approach the main door. As always, I'm greeted by a wooden plate with Dan & Anna engraved on it - it is also a result of my spouse's creative outburst. I know she feels the happiest when she has an opportunity to create something.

I unlock the door and walk in. As soon as I hang my coat on the hanger, Anna is already rushing towards me, standing on the tips of her toes and greeting me with a gentle kiss.

At first glance, Anna is a slight, a bit plain girl. Her dark hair, contrasting with her fair skin, reach her waist. Her big, gray eyes are further magnified by the eyeglasses she's wearing. Yes, we are both adults. But every time she smiles at me with her trademark shy smile, I have butterflies in my stomach like an infatuated teenager.

"I missed you," she says, grabs my hand and leads me towards the kitchen, now filled with some exotic smell. Anna's creativity is undeniable even when she's cooking - and she's always overjoyed like a child when I find her meals tasty.

Even now, her face hardly contains excitement when I wolf down her creation. We talk through the rest of the evening. I usually talk about my work, she enthusiastically introduces me to her new project - a new painting in progress, a short story she started writing yesterday... all while wearing a sweater she knitted herself.

Her bright mind just never stops - and that's one of the many reasons I love her so much. I've dated two girls before her, but with Anna, I feel a true connection for the first time. A hopeless romantic would talk about soulmates. And they would be right. Our personalities complete each other, but we have common hobbies and hopes for the future.

Anna is twenty-four. I met her when she was nineteen and I've spent the most beautiful years of my life with her. We traveled around the world before we finally settled in a nice town in Canada. We are planning to get a dog and then, when the time is right, a child.

We watch a movie after dinner. We don't have the usual disputes of a married couple, like "I want an action splatter while she insists on a rom-com" - we always agree on some nice sci-fi or fantastical movie. After the opening music, Anna grabs my hand and moves it on her head. I smile - it's our own little game. I hold her close to me and start to stroke her hair. Soon, she starts to purr like a content kitten.

As I walk towards the bedroom after the movie ends, I check the calendar on my phone. By presenting and submitting it to the client, I have finished a project I've been working on for a long time - good thing the client paid me accordingly. Satisfied with a job well done, I cross the project off my schedule.

The deadline for my next project, a dull translation of legal documents in Korean, is in three months, so I can feel free to forget about it for a few days. Maybe I could take Anna somewhere tomorrow, perhaps for a dinner out.

Or maybe I could forget about the work for a week and take her for a trip to the mountains. A few days in a cozy, romantic cabin? Why not. I could always catch up with the commission later.

"You're up to something, right?" Anna, dressed in a nightgown, smiles at me with her eyebrows raised. "I know that thoughtful face very well!"

"Maybe I am, maybe I am not," I reply.

"Tell me!" she squeals and attacks me with the full force of her one hundred and fifty-five centimeters. She knocks me down on the bed and we both burst into laughter. Despite the torture techniques she uses on me (tickling, for example), I don't break. It will be a surprise.

An hour and half later, I fall asleep; Anna's quiet breath creates a pleasant ambiance. I'm looking forward to the upcoming days. No work; no Korean symbols and no Cyrillic to translate. Just me and my beloved.

I really do love my life.

...

When I wake up the next day, Anna is already in the kitchen, conjuring up the breakfast. She has always been an early bird. I hear her soft, high-pitched voice singing as she cooks. She's far from a perfect singer, but to me, she sounds like a perfect symphony.

When walking into the bathroom, I can't avoid looking in the mirror. I always wonder how did I manage to charm her so much she was willing to marry me even though I look like a typical computer nerd: skinny, not too tall, with a goatee and a hipster-style haircut. The people mostly guess I'm that kind of bachelor who dwells in his man-cave situated in my mother's basement.

Well, it's not that Anna and I don't have a gaming cave. When she's gaming and going through a tough part, she can be really noisy and only pieces of chocolate placed into her mouth can stop the foul words she sometimes uses. I am that type of calm, level-headed gamer.

Before I set the course towards the kitchen and my wife, I check my phone. My lockscreen wallpaper is, of course, my photo with Anna. The picture was taken at the ComicCon - I'm wearing a costume of Lord Revan and she's my Bastila Shan. I didn't have to push her into that. In fact, the costumes were her idea.

A notification is covering a part of the photo: 1 new message.

I roll my eyes. If it is a new client, I can forget about the trip to the mountains right away.

My annoyed face changes to surprised once I notice the sender's ID is set as Private number. And then, after reading the message, I feel only fear and confusion.

This is your last day. Prepare for the departure.

What the hell is this supposed to mean?

The timestamp tells me the message came at three in the morning.

Is this a threat? Am I the next victim of a serial killer with a wicked sense of humor? I stop and think. I have no enemies, if I don't count Anna's parents - it's no surprise they imagined their daughter's future spouse as a banker or a successful entrepreneur. However, after they found out I can take good care of their girl, they warmed up a little.

I hyperventilate. I read those two damned sentences over and over again.

"Dan! The pancakes la Francé are done!" I hear Anna chirping in the kitchen.

"Just a minute!" I reply with muffled nervosity in my voice.

Should I tell her about the message? I don't know. We promised each other we won't hide any secrets. But she would go crazy if I told her. She's an alarmist prone to panicking. I can vividly imagine her screaming into the phone while calling the police, hugging me and hysterically wailing about not wanting to lose me.

Maybe I should involve the police. It's not a direct threat, but how else can I interpret it? Wait. Maybe I've just forgotten a commission and the client is reminding me. However, it wouldn't explain the "departure". Moreover, I meticulously note every new commission I receive. Anna, who is a chaotic, often mocks me for being too organized to the point my schedule is crafted minute-by-minute.

Well, I can't solve it here and now. I sigh and go to Anna.

Naturally, I have lost my appetite, so I have to endure the pain in Anna's eyes when I just nibble at the food.

"You don't like it?" she peeps. "I tried so hard..."

Yeah, do it. Make my situation even harder. "It's delicious," I assure her. I try to come up with something that could excuse me acting strange for the next twenty-four hours. "It's just... one of my clients who often employs me has problems with his business and it's likely he'll go bankrupt. I'd lose a part of the money I make and we'd have to tighten our belts until I find someone else."

She examines me with her eyes. She can tell when I'm making things up. Then she decides to just smile at me. Perhaps she decided to trust me - or decided she doesn't want to know the truth for now.

"Come on, Dan, you know it's not about money," she says. "We have some savings and after all... the best things are free," she winks at me.

I return her the smile and swallow the rest of the pancakes.

...

I spend the rest of the afternoon thinking. It's not as easy as usual. Anna just flutters around me like a hummingbird and constantly asks me to do something with her. I'm just a step away from snapping at her, but I've never raised my voice at her before and I'm determined not to start now.

In the end, I decide it would be the best to stick to the plan I came up with yesterday.

I lock myself in my workroom and scour the internet for two hours or so, looking for cabins in the mountains I could rent. I smile. Someone's going after me? I'll simply run away. And if I can turn the escape into a vacation with Anna, the better.

The offers repeatedly let me know that I should have booked something sooner. As I start to get frustrated, an offer peeks at me - it's a cozy, well-furnished cabin about a hundred kilometers away from here. The couple who had it booked canceled at the last minute.

I immediately book the cabin and make the payment. Then I leave the workroom. I find Anna in the living room, with a drawing tablet in her hand. I put on a big smile and tell her the news.

As I have expected, joyful squealing and hugging follows. "Adventure!" Anna cheers as she sprints up the stairs into the bedroom where she packs her things. She's clapping her hands like a little girl.

I also pack my stuff; unlike Anna, I only take what I find necessary. It's fascinating how different, yet the same we are. I'm so happy to have her. I have to survive the night so I can be here for her throughout the upcoming days, months, years.

As soon as we finish packing, I cram our luggage (as I've expected, Anna has packed about three times as much as I did) into the trunk of our Mercedes and then we hit the road.

The car radio is playing and Anna joyfully sings along every song she knows. Despite her questionable qualities as a singer, she cheers me up and I allow myself to get carried away. As Anna, Jon and I scream the lyrics of an evergreen Bon Jovi song at the top of our lungs, I even forget about the anonymous message.

I guess it's some kind of mistake after all. The message was intended for someone else. I amuse myself by imagining some low-ranking gangster having trouble with his Don, trying to blame his failure on a message that wasn't delivered. Finally, I feel like myself again.

...

Snow comes with rising altitude. When we finally reach the place where the cabin is supposed to be, all the trees around us are snow-covered. I see the excitement in Anna's bright eyes. And seeing this is worth all the trouble. I guess I was sent to Earth just to make this girl happy.

We park the car right next to the cabin, grab our luggage and step inside. I have to admit it really is cozy. The furniture smells of wood. There is a huge fireplace; Anna immediately lights it up. The warm light and the heat from the fire soon fill the room. For a solid while, we just sit in front of the fireplace, close to each other.

The stress is slowly fading away. I guess I really only needed to unwind a little.

As we settle in the cabin, Anna insists on building snowmen outside. Without hesitation, I join the childish fun. We do funny things with our snowmen, both proper and improper things, and we laugh so hard we can't breathe. We go back inside once Anna's cheeks are red due to freezing temperatures.

When I look at the grandfather clock standing in the corner, the smile freezes on my lips. Five in the afternoon. I have ten hours left.

Oh come on, Dan... you told yourself to let it go. It was a mistake.

Anna prepares a kettle of hot chocolate. Neither of us drinks alcohol and this is a perfect alternative for mulled wine. With Anna around, I don't have to restrain my inner child. Neither does she. We don't have to pretend to be something we're not around each other.

We enjoy the rest of the evening and then hit the bed. A huge window allows us to see outside, where the moonlight glimmers on the snow both on the trees and on the ground.

Anna is huddled close to me, but I'm more and more nervous as the night goes on.

"What's wrong with you?" she asks me suddenly.

"Nothing," I reply.

"Stop lying to me!" I hear traces of anger in her voice, possibly for the first time. "I know how you are when you're okay - and also when you're not okay. And right now, you're nowhere close to the laid-back Dan!"

I look at the clock. Midnight. Three hours left.

With an exasperated sigh, I show her the message.

Anna gasps in shock. "Why... why didn't you tell me sooner?" her voice immediately rises into a panicked falsetto. You should have called the police! Do something! Oh God, Dan... who could have sent this to you?"

"And this is exactly why I decided not to tell you. You'd be a bundle of nerves for the entire day. It's most probably just a mistake or a prank, you know, sending threats to a random number. I'm sure nothing will happen." I kiss her forehead and Anna calms down a little, even though I still hear her muffled sobs.

"I'll stay awake," she whispers. "If someone comes for you... I'll protect you."

I pull the girl closer to me and start to stroke her hair. "I won't allow anyone to hurt you. And in case anything happened to me, I want you to know I love you more than my own life. You know that, right?"

She nods.

...

The minutes pass. Two in the morning. Every sound I hear startles me.

Is my last day about to end?

At 2:46, I see a movement behind the window. I shush Anna and listen carefully. It seems someone is lurking around our cabin.

Strangely, I don't feel fear, just an urge to square up with the bastard who ruined my precious moments with Anna. I slip out of the bed, dress into my jacket and boots I left next to the bed, just in case, and grab a fire poker I found by the fireplace.

It won't be much useful if the intruder has a firearm. But it gives both me and Anna at least some sense of security. "Stay close to me," I whisper and hand the girl her coat.

I keep an eye on the part of the forest visible behind the window. Nothing. I have the poker in one hand, the other hand is squeezed by Anna. Then I see it - a flash of blue light, similar to a flashlight. So they are illuminating their way. Fine.

"We have to get to the car," I tell Anna. "Someone has followed us here."

The girl nods and tightens her grip on my hand.

As quiet as possible, I open the door and step outside. The pajama pants don't protect me from the cold much. I look around, trying to spot the intruder's flashlight again. I actually catch one more blue flash, but I'm not sure where did it come from.

"Quickly, quickly!” I mutter through clenched teeth, dragging mortified Anna towards the car. I keep expecting a gunshot that would end my last day on Earth.

The blue light appears again. I press the "unlock" button on my car keys. The red headlights of the Mercedes beam into the night, as if they wanted to battle the blue glow. The gunshots will come now. The author of the message will either try to damage our tires or simply gun me down before I reach the car.

I don't care. As long as Anna is safe.

I open the driver's door and literally throw Anna into the car. I did it. Even if I died now, Anna would make it - she doesn't have a driving license, but she has some knowledge about how to operate a car. She would be able to get away.

"GET IN!" she shrieks as she scrambles to the passenger's seat. Illuminated by the blue light, I try to cram myself into the car. I expect pain. The blood throbs in my ears to the rhythm of Anna's sobs.

I thrust the key into the ignition. The car comes alive. The clock on the dashboard tell me it's 2:58. Two more minutes and I'll survive my last day.

The blue light now engulfs the whole vehicle. I look around, trying to figure out where is it coming from. To my shock, I realize the light source has to be above the car. The position of shadows clearly points to that.

"Dan... what is it? What is it?!” Anna screams. “For God's sake, GO!”

I try. However... I feel something strange is happening to me. As if the connection between my body and my mind was fading away. I am trying to rev up the car, but at the same time, I feel like someone else is doing it. Thoughts fill my head - thoughts that are seemingly not mine. Bizarre images and memories.

Only one thing still binds me to this reality. Anna's tear-drenched face. She calls my name, but I can't hear it right. She shakes me. Tries to start the car herself.

2:59:56

"I love you," I manage to whisper.

2:59:58

The blue light is separating my body and soul.

3:00:00

"DAN!" Anna's shriek is the last thing I hear before my mind gets sucked into the void.

...

I wake up. However, I have no idea where I am. Or who I am.

The memories of Anna mix up with brand new perceptions. A room full of computer screens and holographic projections that seem so alien and unreal, but eerily familiar at the same time.

"Inhale, exhale, my friend," I hear a voice behind me. They're speaking a language I shouldn't be even able to pronounce - yet I still understand it perfectly. "You've done a good job."

"I've done a job...?" I mutter in that strange language.

My vision is becoming clearer. I'm sitting on some weird chair. Then, the speaker shows himself. I flinch. He's not human. But wait... neither am I. I'm the same as him. I know him. We're friends.

Slowly, the memories of what I've done start coming back to me.

The friend removes a faintly glowing, crystalline helmet from my head and offers me his hand. I accept it, leave the chair and make a few steps. The computer lab now makes more sense to me. I know how to operate it. However, a part of my mind is still with Anna.

"Take your time," the friend smiles after he notices my confused expression. "Living as a human for thirty-two years, from birth to adulthood... that must be pretty demanding, right?"

"You have no idea," I say. Thirty-two years. A few minutes ago, it would seem like a long time to me. Now I perceive it as a moment, an insignificant stretch of time. I remember how it's like to measure time in millennia and eons.

Despite that, those insignificant thirty-two years changed something in me.

I shuffle towards a window. I am high above the ground. It's dark, it must be the nighttime. I see a city below me - strange, surreal buildings illuminated by sterile, bluish light. When I look up at the sky, I see glowing, shattered pieces of space objects and iridescent clouds of a nearby nebula.

Finally, I see my enclave again. Even though I was gone just for a spell, it seems like an eternity to me.

I catch myself still thinking in the human language. I try to find a word describing what am I, but it's not as easy, considering the humans' limited vocabulary.

An alien? No, that's not it. I guess the term interdimensional being is the closest to the truth. We have almost nothing in common with humans, and yet, we're almost the same.

The friend approaches one of the computers. "You have done well. So much data in just thirty-two years. Now we know enough about their world to finally commence the harvest."

The last missing pieces of my memory hit the right spots.

The harvest.

Anna.

"No, you can't do that!" I shove the friend away from the computer. "Stop the harvest! Please! Anna is there... I can't just leave her there! Stop it!”

The friend laughs and lays his hand on my shoulder. "And here we go - the post-extraction hysteria. Sooner or later, it affects all the Pathfinders. Just keep calm. You'll be alright. However, you had to be pretty hard-wired in that world since the message we transmit a day before extraction didn't make you remember who you are."

A Pathfinder. Yes, this is what I am. An individual whose mind is implanted into a being from a different world to live a life of the said being, gathering as much information about their world as possible throughout a single lifetime. The data are then analyzed to prepare an optimal strategy of the harvest. At the same time, the mind of the Pathfinder is returned into their original body through a dimensional rift.

Blue light...

"You can't do that," I feebly try one more time. "Stop it."

"The humans are low on the stairs of evolution," the friend tries to calm me down. "They live for seventy, eighty years. Just a blink of an eye. And if we commence the harvest, our world will be able to sustain for several more centuries." He shrugs. "I know that we're the ones responsible for this and now we have to sacrifice other worlds to save ours. But it is how it is. The strong prey on the weak."

I stare out of the window, watching the harvesting machines getting prepared on a vast plain nearby. Giant, nightmarish machines. Ozone layer siphons. Water pumps. Solar panels. Oxygen extractors. And more. There seems to be an infinite number of them.

I know what happens when they fulfill their purpose. The world that witnesses their rampage is fated to die. It becomes a lifeless wasteland just for the sake of making our world survive for a few more centuries.

I clench my fists. Even though the human life is already fading away from my memory, one thing still lingers there - Anna. What is she doing now. I can do nothing to save her. In a moment, the machines will enter her world through a dimensional rift and steal everything life-giving.

Anna knows nothing. Maybe it's better that way. Right now, she's probably mourning Dan's apparent death. She will soon realize how petty this problem is.

Yes, humans are primitive. They only live for seventy years, they only have five basic senses and they didn't advance much as a species. But I still can't stop thinking about the hidden gems of the humankind. I've spent just a few years with her, but still, I won't forget her.

Maybe in a few eons.

The blue light of a dimensional rift starts to glow above the harvest machines. It will take roughly a day until it's stable enough to allow transport.

One day.

I think about how is Anna, and the rest of the humankind, going to spend the last day on Earth.

...

The end!

If you liked the story, you can comment, share or >donate< if you have some spare change ^^ If you didn’t, feel free to come to my ask box and ask me to never write again... too bad, because I will anyway :)

#writing #my writing #writers #writeblr #short story #romance #mystery

10 notes · View notes

lupinwritings · 5 years

Note

Egobang college au?

Thank you anon!

College AU where Arin is the designated driver at a college party

Arin wasn’t the traditional fraternity guy - he didn’t get drunk or sleep around, he was the one his school always picked to advertise their Greek life program to pprospective parents because of this. He joined the fraternity in an attempt to get over his social anxiety more than anything else and he had made a few close friends from it and was relatively comfortable about everyone in the house, he still got nervous whenever anyone new moved in though.

This was the case when Dan Avidan moved in halfway through his freshman year. Dan was a music major who transformed in from a school in New York, he was a music major, and he seemed the picture of a college fraternity future-president. When Arin was first introduced to Dan, he felt that familiar lump in his throat again - the one he’d spent his first month of college suppressing. It was the “oh no this dude seems cool he’s definitely going to hate me” anxiety rising back up. Despite Dan’s attitude of being funnier and more attractive than most people and knowing it too, he seemed like a pretty chill guy. He asked Arin of all people to show him around campus on his first afternoon off.

That tour became a drop into a sorority party by sunset. Although Arin was technically the tour guide in this situation, he found himself following Dan around as he socialized and got hit on by most of the girls there. Now, Arin wasn’t gay, in fact he had been fairly certain he was straight up until his senior year of high school when he decided that maybe broadening his romantic horizons wouldn’t be a bad idea. That being said, he couldn’t completely ignore the way Dan glanced at him when one girl mentioned that Dan would be the kind of guy to date a girl from every sorority before the end of the year. That look of slight amusement made Arin’s jaw clench. It was easier if every guy was straight, then there was no worry about whether Arin might or might not be attracted to them.

Arin lost Dan at some point and found himself upstairs sitting in a large armchair in front of a window. If he opened the window he was sure he would be able to hear the ocean from this side of campus even with the loud music coming from downstairs; he didn’t open the window, though, for fear of some poor, intoxicated peer falling out later on in the night. Dan found Arin by that window after about three episodes of The Office (which Arin always had downloaded on his phone for times like these). Dan smelled like weed but seemed to still be functional - this wasn’t his first party it seemed.

“I figured you went home.” He said, sitting cross-legged in front of Arin.

Arin took out his earbuds and shook his head “just needed to get away from - all that.” He hoped that didn’t seem too lame of a response.

“Me too.” He leaned his forehead against the arm of Arin’s chair, eyes closed “music’s giving me a headache” Arin tried to ignore how Dan’s hair fell over his leg and how close he was to putting his head in Arin’s lap.

“Want a ride back?” Arin still didn’t call the frat house home, it felt more like a really intense summer camp that didn’t end.

“Can you drive?”

Arin almost took it personally before he realized that was a comment on his mental state, not his driving ability “I didn’t drink. You probably shouldn’t walk around high this late. You’ll definitely get mugged.” Saying that, Arin remembered that Dan had been in New York City before this, he definitely knew not to wander around aimlessly at night but Dan didn’t say anything to suggest he was annoyed by the statement. Instead, he put a hand on Arin’s knee to steady himself as he stood up.

“A ride sounds great in that case. Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it.” Arin half-shouted once they were downstairs, back in the ground of drunk people and loud music. He was glad that Dan brushed off anyone who asked him to stay longer. “The drive isn’t that far” he finished once they were in the front yard.

“No, I mean thanks for the ride too, but thanks for showing me around. I was kind of nervous about transferred this late in the year.”

Dan seemed so confident in everything he did it was odd to think that he had ever been nervous about anything. “Why did you transfer?”

“New York’s just… not the right scene. Everyone there wanted to do, like, traditional stuff and was so focused on making it and I - not really my thing. I don't really care about if music is able to make it onto charts or win awards, as long as it’s good enough that people listen and like it and it’s something I like - I felt like the west coast was a little more like that.”

Arin didn’t really know anything about the LA music scene so he just nodded “I hope it works out for you.” There was a brief silence before Arin continued “I didn’t really want to do traditional stuff either. My parents wanted me to do a pre-med program but I don’t really have the grades for that.”

Dan stumbled and caught himself on Arin’s shoulder. He muttered an apology “my ex was doing pre-med. Seems really stressful.”

Arin found his car in the parking lot near the dining hall where they’d left it. Arin wanted to ask more about Dan, wanted to know what kind of music he wanted to play, what his family was like, why he wasn’t with his ex anymore, he wanted to know everything. Instead, he just opened the passenger door for Dan and smiled “thanks for getting me out of the house.”

“Thanks for getting me back to the house.”

Arin got into the driver’s side and Dan reclined his seat back and stretched. Arin was glad that the drive was short because he didn’t really want to carry a sleeping Dan inside yet.

“Do you have a girlfriend or anything?” Dan asked, his eyes closed.

Arin gripped the wheel and little tighter and was glad that Dan couldn’t see him because he was sure he looked nervous “no, I’m not really looking for a fling or one night stand.”

“I didn’t ask if you were.” Dan had opened his eyes now “I asked if you were dating someone. Me neither, though.”

“Most girls aren’t really looking for that, most that I know at least.”

“Then it’s good that you’ve got me.”

Arin decided he wasn’t going to reply to that because then he would be forced to accept that that was something that Dan had really said. He probably didn’t mean it that way anyway, why get his hopes up by dwelling on it?

As nice as the idea of just letting that comment go was, Arin knew damn well that he was definitely going to be up for a while thinking about what Dan had meant by that and what he probably should have said as a reply that wasn’t just helping Dan to his room and closing the door behind him.

Hope you guys enjoyed! Feel free to send me more prompts for this au or other ones!

#egobang

42 notes · View notes

alightseoul · 5 years

Text

Goodbye

hey seoul sister ain’t that mister mister on the radio….

So, I have officially left Korea and it’s super bittersweet. Yea, I’ve missed home and the general cocoon of comfortableness that comes along with your first language being the dominant language where you live, but now that I’m off Korean soil, I’m pretty bummed. Looking back on my trip, I did some pretty amazing things and met some awesome people. All the Light Fellows at Sogang left Korea today and unlike last time I travelled abroad, I made sure that my plane wasn’t super early in the morning, so I was able to relax before my plane left. The last few days in Korea were kind of a blur because I was frantically trying to see and more importantly, eat, all the things that I loved. I also tried to say goodbye to the few people at Sogang that I became somewhat close with during the program. One of the girls who I sat across from in class for the past three months ended up getting dumped by her boyfriend on their one year anniversary and one week before her birthday. To add insult to multiple injuries, they live together and he wants her to move out soon. And to add salt to that insulted injury, he may have cheated? Unsure. Unclear. Seems that way though. So basically I and another one of my classmates spent the day before I left Seoul eating lunch and comforting our class friend on her birthday. I say all of this to give an example of how much I learned about the other people in my class and how close I may have become with them if my time there wasn’t so short. Actually, this is a pretty good place to do a review about Sogang. If I don’t do it now I’ll never do it.

Sogang Review: Basically, should you go to Sogang?

Whether you’re a Light Fellow or a random that happened upon my blog (how??), deciding which university to attend in Korea can be really hard seeing as besides some students who have Korean parents or university age friends in Korea, Korean Universities are a complete mystery. I knew nothing about any of the schools the Light Fellowship funded so I ended up asking Professor Lee-Smith which school she recommended. Without hesitation, she recommended Sogang. So, without hesitation, I chose Sogang and all-in-all, I don’t regret my decision. There were some cons, but I think the pros were more weighty, if not more plentiful, than the cons. So, here it goes:

Pros:

Location, location, location: That may sound like some crap a pedo-stach donning real estate agent in LA would say but it seriously applies here. Sogang is part of an area that specifically caters to the needs of university age students. Sogang and three other universities are all situated together, meaning that the food is cheaper, there are a lot of options and there’s always something happening on the weekends. If you’re anything like me and large gatherings of young people scare you, don’t be worried, Sogang is close enough to the action but far enough away that if you live somewhere close by you won’t be bombarded with noise all the time.

Focus on speaking: Sogang has a reputation for emphasizing speaking over reading and writing which I was initially pretty interested in because I think I can better my writing and reading at home. Here’s the thing: Sogang does deal with a lot of speaking, but mostly because your classmates are usually not native English speakers. Only one other girl in my class of 16-ish people spoke English natively and although there were some girls from Hong Kong, they preferred to speak in Cantonese. Since everyone has different native tongues, class has to be taught all in Korean (although many of the teachers know at least some English vocabulary if you want to ask them a specific word).

Homework load: there is barely any work. Seriously. Maybe one or two worksheets a day but besides that it’s just looking over the vocabulary for the next day. The low workload allowed me and the other Sogang Light Fellows to see as much of Seoul as possible without being hindered by grades. Actually, I found out halfway through the semester that homework doesn’t even count toward your final grade.

Cons:

Homework load: so I know just above I said this was a pro, but the type A in me can’t help but feel a bit cheated by the low work-load and general lack of challenge Sogang offered. On the one hand, I really appreciate that I was able to travel around the peninsula, go out to eat with friends and generally not worry about school when I wasn’t in class, but another part of me still thinks I could have come away with more Korean knowledge if my classes had been more difficult. I mean, I could have self-studied but...you know...

The classmates: I don’t really know how to say this, but I’m going to try anyway: some of the classmates at Sogang came to Korea for reasons that were so different from mine that it made it difficult for us to become close. I know that makes no sense, I’ll explain further: I’m not sure if this is a Sogang specific observation, but I did find that a surprisingly large portion of my classmates were in Korea because they loved Kpop or were interested in dating/marrying a Korean person (for a variety of reasons). Now, I know what this sounds like: me being a judgemental academic you-know-what, BUT just to put it in context, many of my Yale classmates at Seoul National University had different experiences. I’m not looking down on people for coming to Korea and wanting to integrate into Korean culture, which could naturally include dating Korean people and consuming Korean pop culture, I’m just saying that I feel like the low workload of Sogang attracts a certain population that makes socializing at the school a tad difficult. I came into Sogang with the mindset that I wanted to learn a foreign language, mostly for the heck of learning one, whereas a bunch of my classmates were actively trying to integrate into the culture, mainly through dating. Honestly, now that I’ve started writing this I realize it’s much harder to explain than I expected and maybe it’s just me not getting along with the certain individuals I happened across, but the constant focus on finding a Korean partner kept me at a distance from even the girls I spent the most time with from my Sogang class.

Okay, that’s enough about Sogang. Korean, you were so good to me. I can’t wait to come back.

Peace

#sogang #korea #korean university #seoul #sincheon

2 notes · View notes

bethhxrmon · 6 years

Text

All I Ask of You Pt. 10

“To going against the grain, going insane, going mad.” - “La Vie Bohme” from RENT

Pairing: Peter Parker x Female OC

Word Count: 4,534

Warnings: Underage drinking

Summary: It’s the holidays and everyone’s happy right now!

A/N: It may be late, but it’s still Saturday so that’s what counts! I was super excited to make this chapter and I hope you all love it as much as I do!

MASTERLIST

Playlist

Christmas Eve felt almost like a desperate attempt for Annie’s parents to make up for the last couple months. Though, it obviously wasn’t enough and Annie couldn’t help pointing that out every chance she got. Whether she was being too harsh or not, she really couldn’t be bothered to give a damn. However, she would have been lying if she said she didn’t enjoy constantly pointing out their mistakes and affairs whenever she wanted to get away with something.

Of course it pissed her parents off, but it probably pissed them off more that Annie wasn’t wrong. It was using their failing marriage as a scapegoat that led to Annie being outside in the winter evening with a small wrapped package. The odds of running into Spider-Man were pretty slim, it was a holiday after all. Despite it only being six at night, the sky was dark with only streetlights, cars, and electronic billboards there to light the way.

The temperature drop that winter brought always left Annie cursing her choice to be a superhero instead of a street magician. She had even put a few shirts underneath the white hoodie she had on and she was still shivering. Stealing some electricity to attempt to warm up was her best bet, but even that wasn’t exactly working.

With the streets bustling with the absolute last-second holiday shopping, it was difficult to find any real crime going on as she lurked in an alley. That was when she heard a jump. Without giving it a second thought, Annie swerved around and launched the ball of electricity that was in her hand at none other than Spider-Man himself.

He quickly sidestepped the electricity and held his hands up, “Hey, it’s okay, it’s just me.”

Annie sighed a little, “You can’t just sneak up on me like that! If I hit you then that’s who knows how many volts straight to your chest.”

“Oh, it’s cool. Mr. Stark made my suit electricity-proof. Sorry I scared you, Swan. Merry Christmas, by the way. What’s that you’ve got in your hands there?” he asked, talking as though Annie hadn’t told him to leave her alone a week ago.

Annie glanced down and the package, “Um… it’s not much, but it’s for you, actually. Kind of a ‘Merry Christmas, sorry I yelled at you and I actually do kinda enjoy working with you’ present.”

“Well that’s great! I got something for you too! It’s not much either, but uh… it’s something I thought you’d like,” he replied, handing her something that was in a paper bag.

Annie handed him the wrapped parcel and took the thing he gave her, “You seriously didn’t have to,” she said, pulling out a long sleeved shirt.

“I should probably mention it’s got a little heater in it. I know you said to not follow you, but I saw you kept getting super cold and I uh- well I sort of stole it from Mr. Stark,” Spider-Man said sheepishly as he unwrapped his present to find a Santa hat.

Annie smiled a bit, “Thanks, that’s way awesome. I wasn’t really sure what to get you that you didn’t already have, and I know it’s super cheesy and I totally get it if you don-”

“It’s great, Swan, really, I love it, thanks,” he replied, hugging her.

She laughed a bit, “No problem, I’m just sorry I’ve been such a bitch, and I should probably apologize in advance for when the exact same thing happens again for whatever reason I decide to get mad again.”

“Hey, I get it. You’ve been alone awhile and you’re not used to having yours truly making things a bit easier on you,” he claimed.

She rolled her eyes and sighed, “Actually I get more nervous when you insert yourself and expect me to cover you. I mean, come on, my powers could crap out on me.”

“I don’t think that would happen, obviously your powers work better when your more emotional, so they work better when your stressed,” he said, shrugging.

Annie frowned, “You’re not wrong… but still, it’s so damn stressful.”

Feeling a huge sense of accomplishment at fixing things with Spider-Man, Annie was able to get back to her apartment with a weight lifted from her chest. With gifts already bought for everyone, there wasn’t exactly anything worth worrying about. Instead of going out to hang out with her parents, Annie spent the remainder of her night reading.

By the time morning rolled around, Annie was in the same clothes that she had been when she was reading. She couldn’t remember putting down her book or being on her bed in the first place. Still the computer monitor across from her confirmed that it was Christmas morning, and she crawled out of bed, heading out to the kitchen where a small Christmas tree was set up.

Underneath the fake, silver tree were a handful of presents. Two of them were for her parents and there were a few for Annie. She could tell that they were probably trying to compensate for the affairs, but she couldn’t have cared less. A part of her just liked having a scapegoat. Besides, it was more of a “being bitter about how her dad tried to explain her being a failed science fair project” thing rather than being angry about her parents cheating on each other.

The whole infidelity thing was their thing to solve and Annie wanted no part in it. She padded over to the coffee maker and put some water and more grounds in it before starting the machine. As it heated up, Annie checked her phone, tempted to call Harper and wake them up extremely early simply to be a pain in the ass. After a few minutes, she was just about to pick up her phone to dial her friend when she saw Harper’s contact name on the screen.

Annie answered, trying to not laugh and wake up her parents, “What the hell are you doing awake at like… four in the morning?”

“Because I know you and that you’d probably wake me up anyways,” Harper replied, a smirk audible in their voice.

Annie rolled her eyes, finding a mug to pour her coffee into, “Okay, but that doesn’t explain why you’d wake up so early.”

“Bold of you to assume I ever even went to sleep. I had gifts to wrap,” they said, sighing a bit.

Annie chuckled lightly as she poured some coffee in her mug, “Who are you spending all this time wrapping presents for?”

“My parents. If I wrapped all their presents for their godforsaken business partners then they said they would give me ten grand to do whatever I wanted with,” they responded.

Annie frowned a bit, “What do you need ten thousand for, exactly?”

“I’m splitting it up between charities and college. Did I mention that I heard back from NYU?” they asked.

Annie raised an eyebrow, retreating to her room and sitting at her desk, “Nope, I didn’t even know you were graduating early.”

“Oh, well, surprise, I am! And I heard back from NYU and their fashion program, so I’m just about set up to start there in September,” they said, yawning.

Annie’s jaw dropped, “Wait, so you’re, like, going to NYU, like, Manhattan?”

“Yeah, is there another one that I didn’t hear about?” Harper retorted.

Annie grinned, “That’s fucking awesome! You’ll be here with me and you can finally meet my new friends, it’ll be great!”

“What’ll really be great is when I can get out of this hellhole,” they muttered, huffing a bit.

Annie rolled her eyes, “Harper, you’re the kid of a CEO, people would kill to be in the position you’re in.”

“But what good is any of it if they’re not gonna pay for any of my school? They’re basically kicking me out after graduation, which might be for the better. I could just be talking too much,” they replied.

Annie took a sip of coffee, “Yeah, that might be it, you should get some sleep. You got my present in the mail, right?”

“Yep… I may or may not have opened it already,” Harper admitted.

Annie sighed, “Well, by the sound of that I’m guessing you liked it.”

“Obviously! New colored pencils like I’d been talking about… oh and I ate half of the almond butter you got me last night, whoops,” they said.

Annie shook her head, “Of course you did. Well, I’m glad you liked it.”

“Speaking of liking presents, I hope you liked what your friends got you. Especially that one Peter guy, he sounds really into you,” Harper started.

Annie felt her face go red, “I doubt it. He’s just a really nice guy. Besides, things are really complicated at the moment… the last thing I need is a relationship.”

“What’s so complicated about dating the guy you’ve been wanting to kiss?” Harper asked.

Annie stared at her coffee, only her breathing audible over the line, “Because there might be more than one guy I wanna kiss?”

“You know I hate it when you answer something like it’s a question. For fuck’s sake, please tell me you’re not into both of your guy friends? Or is it that one girl, Tina? You’ve been around her a lot, or Michelle?” Harper started to trail off.

Annie coughed, “No, none of them. Ned’s just my friend and Tina’s got her own shit. I don’t know if I know Michelle enough to be crushing on her.”

“Then who?”

“It’s stupid, really.”

“Not if it’s making you question everything you’ve been feeling for weeks.”

“I think I like Spider-Man. It’s just… he’s so damn infuriating, but I never wanna fight with him so we always get through our arguments and he’s just really sweet and funny and… I don’t know what to do, Harper.”

“Funny, you like them both for the same reasons… maybe you should wait it out,” Harper suggested, “But I gotta sleep otherwise I’m gonna blow up my parent’s place and then we’ll have a bigger problem than your boy troubles.”

“Alrighty, well I’ll talk to you later, then. Have fun sleeping,” Annie replied before the line went dead.

When Annie’s parents finally woke up, she made her way back into the kitchen. Though it was just her dad pouring himself a cup of coffee. Seeing him, Annie was just about to slip back into her room, but he already saw her so instead she sat at the dining room table. She was halfway through her cup of coffee and it was still warm.

“How’d you sleep?” he asked.

Annie shrugged, “Alright, I guess.”

“You must’ve been pretty tired, I walked in and you had your book on your face,” her dad replied, chuckling a bit at her.

Annie looked up at him, “So you moved me?”

“Well, yeah. I’m your dad, Annika, and sometimes I screw up, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t care about you,” he told her as he sat across from her.

She nodded, looking at her cup, “Right… are you being nice because you’re about to talk about getting a divorce?”

“No. God, no, Ann, we moved so we could fix things. We wouldn’t drag you out here to just give up now,” he said.

She sighed, “Okay, good. Otherwise I think I’d run out of here if you pulled that today.”

“I wouldn’t do that, we wouldn’t,” he assured her.

“We wouldn’t do what?” her mom asked as she padded into the dining room.

Her dad paused, drinking some coffee, “Get a divorce and tell her today.”

“Oh, sweetie, no. We’d stay married until you were an adult just so it wouldn’t feel like we moved for nothing,” added her mom.

Annie nodded again, not saying anything for a moment, “So… um… should we get to the fun gift giving thing? I kinda said I’d meet my friends to exchange gifts and stuff.”

“Yeah! Of course, of course! You’re gonna love what I got you,” her mom said, pulling a bagged present from next to the tree.

The gifts weren’t as much of pleas for forgiveness as Annie had expected. That was for the best, though, otherwise she may have felt a pang of guilt for using them so she could get out more often. She noticed that they did seem to get them with her interests in mind, though. Some soundtracks and books. Even a hoodie or two, her parents liked what she got for them. It was always hard with adults because the things they wanted were things that she would never get enough money to buy. Hell, some of the things they wanted had nothing to do with money. Not that she could blame them.

“Also, there’s one thing that we also got that we can’t really give you,” her dad began.

Annie’s russet eyes squinted, “What do you mean?”

“Well, tomorrow we’re leaving for a couple’s retreat to try and fix things. We thought the least we could do is make a real effort at trying,” her mom explained.

Annie nodded, smiling a bit, “When do you get back?”

“January second, we’ll be back early because classes start up the day after,” said her dad.

She smiled at the both of them, “Th-that’s great, actually, thanks you guys.”

“We thought you’d appreciate it because of how much these problems were meaning to you,” her dad replied.

The day passed by easier and for the first time in weeks, Annie felt comfortable as she moved around the apartment. Knowing that her parents didn’t just stop caring did leave her feeling lighter. Not to mention the ideas that were flooding her mind as she fully realized that they would be gone through new year’s. Though, those were plans to talk about when she saw her friends next.

Before she knew it, it was time to get to Peter’s apartment where she was supposed to meet up with Peter, Ned, and even Tina. Apparently they had talked to her before they asked Annie to come. It raised plenty of questions that Annie wasn’t even sure of how to ask. Still, she left her apartment with some ginger snaps that her dad had made as well as the gifts for each of them.

She made it to the other apartment without any issue and she knocked on the door. It had been so cold outside and Annie was left wishing that she had chosen to wear a better jacket rather than a sweatshirt. Not to mention how the presents had been kind of difficult to carry while walking a few blocks in New York traffic. Despite the holidays, the streets were as busy as ever. Though, maybe she shouldn’t have been so surprised.

Aunt May opened the door, smiling, “There you are! The others have been waiting. Merry Christmas by the way! How’s your day been?”

“Merry Christmas! I’ve actually been pretty great. My dad baked a ton of ginger snaps and I thought you might like some,” Annie greeted, nodding at the top box which was a tin.

May took the tin off the top of the pile, “Thank you, this is lovely!”

“No problem!” she replied, waltzing right into Peter’s room.

“Hey, look who decided to show up,” Tina commented, getting up to help Annie with the boxes.

Annie rolled her eyes, “Whatever, you guys told me to show up now, so there’s obviously something you’re all hiding.”

“You don’t know that!” Ned protested.

Annie smirked as she sat down on Peter’s bed, “Right, well I got all of you presents, so I expect only the best from each of you.”

“Annie! I told you not to get me anything,” Tina responded, crossing her arms.

Annie shrugged, “Well then I guess my hand slipped and wrapped something up for you.”

“You’re gonna love what I got you, go on, open it,” Ned insisted, handing her a box.

Annie opened it only to get a litter box and cat litter, “Um… okay, it’s great…”

“I told you it was a weak idea, I got you this,” Tina said, handing Annie a bag.

Annie got a food bowl with some cat food and she raised an eyebrow, “Did you guys… no. There’s no way.”

“Okay, you’ll love this,” Peter insisted, starting to burst out laughing as he handed his haphazardly wrapped gift.

Annie ripped the paper only to get cat toys, “Okay, there’s no way you guys got me a cat. No, I couldn’t, really, you guys.”

“Who said anything about a cat? We didn’t get you a cat,” Ned replied, only to be stopped by a meow that came from Peter’s closed closet.

Annie looked at the three of them and stood up, walking over to the closet and opened it. There was a cat carrier and in the carrier was a cat with patches all over its face and a crooked tail from where it had probably been broken in the past. She picked up the carrier and opened it, coaxing out the cat. Her eyes were wide and her mouth was opened and grinning. No words were able to leave her mouth.

Tina smirked a bit, “I’m guessing we did good.”

“What’s his name?” Annie asked.

“Well, the shelter named him Patches,” Ned said.

Annie scoffed, “That’s a dumb name… I think I’m gonna name him… Erik, yeah, definitely Erik.”

“Like The Phantom of the Opera? Come on,” Ned commented, laughing a bit.

Annie sighed, scratching the cat behind the ear, “I really can’t thank you guys enough, now I feel like I totally fucked up with what I got you guys.”

“Nah, there’s no way, let’s see them,” Ned insisted.

Annie handed each of them their presents, trying to gauge their reactions. Of course, none of them were exactly a pet that had been carefully hidden from her for the time that she had been there. At least they each kinda meant something though. Well, she hoped that they would.

Peter smiled, tugging the Santa hat on his head down a bit as he looked at the planner and pen, “It’s great, thanks,” he said as he opened it, reading the inside of the planner.

Because she hadn’t wanted to confuse Peter with the gift she wrote something. Though, it was possibly influenced by other feelings that were running through her head at the time. The note read: Peter, I know that half the time you’re a disorganized mess (in the best way, duh) and figured this might help in case you get super stressed. Even if it doesn’t, you can always call me or something. I don’t really know where I was going with this, but Merry Christmas!

Ned laughed a bit, beaming at the lego store gift card, “This is perfect! I could get a Millenium Falcon set with this, thanks so much!”

Tina carefully unwrapped her present, “I really didn’t need anything…” she looked at the journals and pens, “How’d you know?”

“I saw you in that stationery store… my hand slipped and bought a few things,” Annie claimed, shrugging.

The group spent so much time talking in that circle, somehow all huddled up on Peter’s bed. They squished between each other, and that was when Annie asked them to come to her place for new year’s. She’d even told them to spend the night if they wanted. It had been Ned’s idea to call and ask Michelle to join them. By the time they all left for their homes, Annie had plans for while her parents were gone.

When she got home carrying her cat and all the things to take care of him as well, her dad didn’t even try to protest it. All he said was that she had to take care of him and that he wouldn’t do it for her. Erik was a really sweet cat, wanting nothing more than to lay on her bed and be petted. At least, that was how he was acting right then. A part of her figured he’d start running all over the apartment like crazy in a day or two.

As she opened one of the plastic packages of toys, Annie noticed a small box. When she opened it, there was a necklace of a masquerade mask necklace. Her jaw dropped, hardly able to believe that Peter had gotten her anything aside the stuff for the cat. She really didn’t need or want anything else. Though there was also a folded up note that read: Annie, I know you said you just wanted a cat, but I thought you should have something else to. So I thought I’d let you know that you’re more of a Christine because you’re too good to be anything else.

That not was the only thing that she could think about until new year’s eve. It wandered into her mind when she worked with Spider-Man a couple of times that week. He was constantly wearing that Santa hat and Annie wore that shirt with a heater in it under her sweatshirt all the time. Though, just when she started bantering a little bit too long with Spider-Man, she couldn’t help but think about how much Peter had cared. It made her wonder if Spider-Man would do the same for her if he had the chance.

One right after the other, Peter, Ned, Michelle, and Tina came on in. It wasn’t like Annie had a huge party planned out, she just didn’t want to be alone for the holiday. Not when she could have the chance to stay up late with her friends. Even though Christmas had passed, Peter was still wearing a Santa hat like he had on Christmas.

“Pete, isn’t it a bit late for Santa hats?” Annie asked, toying around with the pendant on her necklace.

Peter’s face reddened, “N-no, I wouldn’t say so.”

“I think she’s got a point, unless you’re wearing it for a specific reason,” Michelle said, looking up from her book as she laid on the couch.

Annie chuckled a bit as Peter seemed at a loss for words as she poured some hot chocolate for all of them, “Don’t worry, it’s cute.”

“Enough flirting, you two, otherwise you’re both gonna need to find a room,” Ned commented, flipping through the channels on Annie’s television.

Peter frowned, “I-I wasn’t… we weren’t doing… a-anything.”

“So you weren’t flirting?” Annie asked, raising her eyebrows suggestively.

He shook his head, “N-nope.”

“Oh, okay,” Annie said, handing him a cup of hot chocolate.

The night went on as a group sleepover should. The group watched some dumb comedies while eating food and drinking warm drinks. It felt like things were just fine, and even Tina appeared to be relaxed around all of them. Both her and Michelle seemed to enjoy being left on their own to read or write while Ned, Peter, and Annie were left to do most of the talking.

As midnight drew closer, Annie looked at the others, “Hey, what do you guys think of some champagne to ring in the new year?”

“I can’t have any… I’ve been going straight, but I can watch you guys to make sure no one does anything dumb,” Tina offered.

“Alright, what about the rest of you guys?” Annie asked as she got up from her comfy chair.

Ned and Peter shrugged, “I guess it’s cool with us,” Ned replied.

“You could hit me up with two if you wanted,” Michelle responded.

Annie laughed a bit, “Okay, I’ll be right back.”

In a few minutes, Annie was back with a glass that was generously full for everyone. She’d filled the glass for Tina with some sparkling cider because everyone deserved a nice new year’s drink. It was five minutes until 2018 and Annie had a decent feeling about the new year. They all talked about what they really wanted to do for that year and all the things that they hoped would happen.

“I just wanna get an apartment and start over, you know? Just have everything be fresh and to move on finally,” Tina said, cheating and sipping some of her drink before midnight.

Michelle nodded, “Fair enough, I want some more books and more time to read them, honestly.”

“If I managed to pass this next semester I’d be happy, but really I just want to prove I can do stuff, like, theatre or something else, just I don’t want to be doubted,” Annie admitted.

Ned sighed a bit, “I wanna hack some stuff, nothing huge, but just enough to where it’s super cool.”

“Yeah… I-I think I want my internship to go further, I’m doing a lot already, but I wanna do more,” Peter said, looking at the clock.

Ned grinned, starting to count down, “Five. Four. Three. Two. One…”

“Holy shit it’s the new year!” Annie exclaimed, drinking her champagne.

They all started drinking, Peter seeming to be almost unaffected by it. Michelle went back to her book, drinking and not paying too much attention to the others. Ned and Annie, however, were tipsy halfway through their glasses. Everything seemed to be so funny and Annie wasn’t sure why. And Peter looked so damn cute and she wanted to pull him close and kiss him. She wish she’d done that already, why hadn’t she?

By the time she finished her glass, she wasn’t exactly herself when she talked to her friends, “Y’know, ‘m real glad y’guys came… I woulda been so depressed if I’re by m’self.”

“Yeah, me too, ‘m happy I came,” Ned replied and the pair started laughing, “Y’know, ya should talk to Peter, he wants to tell ya somethin’.”

Annie giggled, pulling Peter closer a bit by his sleeve, “C’mon, tell me in my room.”

She dragged him right to her room and she sat on her bed, patting the space next to her. When he sat down she had her arms around him and buried her head into the crook of his neck. Annie hummed happily, starting to play with Peter’s hair.

“What did ya wanna tell me?” Annie asked, looking up at him.

Peter shook his head, “You’re drunk, it’s a terrible time to tell you.”

“Oh c’mon!” Annie whined, pouting.

Peter sighed, “Nope. But did you wanna tell me something?”

“Well, yeah, you’re real cute, just all the time. An’ I can’t understand why you won’t like me back, but everyone says you do,” Annie replied.

Peter smiled a bit, his cheeks flushing, “Really?”

“Yeah,” she said, looking at him and yawning, “I should sleep though, I feel like you’re trickin’ me into sayin’ too much.”

Peter nodded, pulling back the covers and helping her lie down, “Can ya stay with me?” Annie asked.

Peter thought about it a moment and nodded, “Sure, yeah.”

Annie pulled him close, wanting to feel him so close to her and Peter didn’t mind. Though he also wondered how much of it was real and how much of it was just her being drunk. At the same time, he didn’t want her thinking he was a creep, so when she fell asleep he left the bed and slept on the floor.

Tag list: @flushings-here / @upsidedownparker / @gaypanda / @ijustdontknowsometimes / @lionsfandomsandbearsohmy / @thwipparker / @buzzinglee (just ask to be added to the tag list)

#peter parker #peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader #peter parker x you #peter parker fanfic #peter parker x oc #mcu #marvel #trans peter parker #trans spider-man #spider-man #spider-man x reader #spider-man x oc #fanfic #original characters #writing #all i ask of you fic

9 notes · View notes

yurio-plisetksy · 6 years

Text

First dates and: Negasonic Teenage Warhead (Ellie) x Fem!Reader

Summary: For the first time ever you decide to sign up for a local speed dating program, unbeknownst it was for mutants only. Luckily you are alowed to join, and maybe that ends up being the best thing that happened to you so far.

Warnings: None.

For the beautiful @glitter-cat-cosplay, sorry for the wait! :)

You knew it was lame to actually sign up for something like this. It had been a coincidence already that you had read the newspaper, but for some reason there had been a certain interest towards an article surrounded by an excessive amount of hearts. You had scanned your eyes over the pink square that was informing you about some kind of speed dating thing that was happening in a nearby coffee shop. Before you knew it you had actually filled in the form and send it to the coffee shop’s owner without even thinking of the consequences.

You remembered the barista asking about your powers, to which you gave him a confused look. Turning to the old man with the toothy smile, you wondered if he was the one who initiated the idea. He repeated his question, this time explaining that the dating thing was supposed to be for mutants… you apologized with embarrassment on your cheeks and told him you had no powers whatsoever. The man laughed.

“It’s fine, you can join. I didn’t even think anybody would show up.” He said while placing a cappuccino in front of you, the layer of foam rich and decorated with a small heart of cocoa powder.

“To be honest, it’s unlike me to sign up for things like these, but I seemed to sense something about this article or something… maybe it was because of how cheesy it was.”

The man laughed again, introduced himself as Stan and explained they made the article because of his wife.

“She past away a few years ago, I started this because my wife and I met in a coffee shop back in our hometown. I figured this was a nice way to reminisce those times…” He said while cleaning a cup with a white cloth. You smiled and told him that was the perfect way to do so.

After that he told you to take a seat at one of the tables. More people had been coming into the coffee shop, and while they all gave Stan information about their powers, there were actually several others who had no powers as well.

You couldn’t say you were nervous, but there was definitely a small tremble in your fingers as you lifted your cup. The speed dating round were just about to start when a certain someone came in at the last minute.

Her shaved head looked as badass as her whole appearance. From her black combat boots to the halter top she wore, everything seemed to fit like a puzzle. Ripped skinny jeans and a very worn leather jacket. She walked passed your table, and your eyes couldn’t help but follow her. The nape of her neck was shaved with a criss cross pattern and for some reason it made you smile.

Then you were joined by a gentleman with piercing green eyes. As polite as you were you offered him a smile, and before you even got the chance to ask him something, he was rambling about himself as a record player on repeat.

After 10 minutes of continuous nodding and very boring chit chat, the next person was at your table, and you greeted her with a somewhat exhausted smile.

“Was he that bad?”

“I think this is the first time I’m actually able to say something.”

She laughed at your joke, and you figured she couldn’t be bad after all.

But you were so wrong. “How could you think that? What is wrong with you?” She exclaims with such drama you instinctively roll your eyes at her. Luckily the buzzer goes off and you were yet again saved from another bad date.

A sigh fell from your lips, and you quickly took a sip of your now cold cappuccino. The foam lathered on your upper lip and with awkward skill you managed to lick it off.

“I guess you’re next.” Someone spoke, an as you looked up from your cup you almost choked in your sip of coffee.

There she was in all her glory. Eyeliner sharp and lips dark, framing a stoic look that could only be described as intimidating. She eyed you up and down before taking a seat a little less reluctant than you would have expected.

“Y-Yes, I am!” You exclaimed, and quickly wiped the foam from your mouth. Offering her your hand, she shook it and leaned back in her seat.

“I’m __, it’s nice to meet you… uh…” You tilt your head as a silent question. The girl nods and finishes your question.

“It’s Ellie…”

Another smile from your side, and you place your chin in the palm of your hand.

“Ellie, it suits you.” For the first time since you sat with her a small grin tugs at her features. It’s almost angelic and you find yourself swooning at the sight of it.

“So how did you end up here?”

The round was supposed to last 10 minutes. Those minutes turned into hours, and currently you find yourself at the bar of the coffeeshop, heavily discussing the plot of one of your favorite books. Ellie snorts at your conclusion, an stirs her drink with her straw.

“I mean, there should always be a certain balance, even in relationships as such… I feel like it’s missing something.”

“I agree that there’s something missing, but to create an ending like that only makes it more interesting!” You beam under the topic, and Ellie can’t help but chuckle at the excitement on your face. Literature was something she admired, but never could get into. Once you explained the plot of one of your favorite books, she seemed to recognise the story. Now as you rambled about the characters she felt her cheeks glow. You were an amazing person to be around, and there was a sudden urge to just grab your hand and hold it.

To your surprise, she actually did. Her fingers wrapped around your palm, and in the middle of your sentence you stopped to look at the gesture. Ellie hummed and squeezed your hand lightly, making you blush and cover your face with your other hand.

“Why did you stop? I wanted to hear more about that one guy.”

“You grabbed my hand.”

“Do you not like that?” She asked, a little concerned but a little forceful as well.

“No, I like it!”

*1 year later*

“Again? Seriously?”

You groan as Ellie stands in front of your bed, completely in costume and her now somewhat grown hair neatly styled. It sounded cool to have some kind of superhero girlfriend, but the amount of times she needed to leave was ridiculous. It felt like you saw her on Tv more than in real life.

“No, I just came back.” She answered and started taking off her suit, before throwing it carelessly in the armchair. You raised an eyebrow at the gesture and offered a sarcastic chuckle.

“You’re gonna make me pick that up?” Ellie asks while plopping down next to you on the bed, immediately searching for your hand and grabbing it once it was found.

With a nod you lay back against your pillow, a sigh of relief dropping from your lips.

“Probably later… let’s just lay here for now.” You offered and smiled at her grateful look. She nestled under your arms and pulled the covers over the two of you, as if it was some invisible cloak that hid you from the world.

It had been a year since you first met in that tiny coffeeshop, and currently you were in a happy, healthy relationship with Ellie. You had learned about her powers not much later after your first official date, and that was also the time when she started leaving at the most random times. It took you a while to get used to it, but you could do nothing but accept her for who she is and what she does for a living. And instead of complaining, supporting her and her cause was much more affective you figured.

“You do your hair when you go out?”

“It adds to my super cool outfit.”

Another laugh. You find yourself laughing a lot these days, and while you didn’t want to admit it was because of Ellie, it definitely was. Times like these were it was just the two of you sitting here and talking was one of your favorite things to do. You figured your girlfriend probably agrees, but she was never one to openly talk about such things.

“What time are you in class?” She asks, and the dawn of reality crashes upon your shoulders. Completely forgetting about your college life for a moment and reaching out towards your phone at your nightstand. Unlocking it with Ellie’s birthday as your password, you quickly checked your schedule only to discover you have class in 2 hours.

“It’s fine I have some time.” You tell her and offer her a look at your screen. She takes no time to fully inspect it. She roams her eyes over the screen and shrugs, before dropping her head back on the mattress. It’s silent after she does, and you find it less comfortable than usual. It makes you guess there’s something bothering her.

“Ellie…”

“Are we still up for our date after school?”

You nod in response, and accepts the way she ignores the mention of your name. If something was really bothering her, she would tell you once it became too suffocating for her to hold onto. That was just how she worked.

It had been a quite peaceful 1,5 hours of lounging around. You had read Ellie some books while she laid on your lap, before telling her you needed to get ready for school. There had been a small whine spilling from her lips, but nothing that caused your heart to ache once leaving her by herself.

College was as boring as ever, and just like every other day you imagined to have some kind of superpower and join Ellie on her journey to destroy all evil on earth… a bit cliché maybe, but with a teacher as Ms. Laing for English anything that distracted you from her boring lecture would help you get through the day.

Lunch was spend reading in the library, giving a hesitant look at the librarian as you plucked an apple from your back and bit into the fruit. She didn’t seem to mind and ignored your presence completely, leaving you to read on your own in peace.

Luckily classes finished a bit earlier than usual, and while you didn’t exactly skip out of class, there was definitely a bounce to your step as you headed for the exit. Ellie had been on your mind all day, and finally you could head towards the one coffeeshop that changed your life.

“Good afternoon, Stan.” You politely greeted the old man, who was busy brewing a hazelnut coffee. He turned to you and offered you a smile, corners of his mouth wrinkling at the gesture.

“Hello, darling. What can I get for you today?” He asks while shuffling towards the counter. You order the usual, and the man smiles, wondering why he even asks. He knows your girlfriend is less about coffee, and he offers some juice for her instead.

Taking both drinks towards one of the booths, you wait for Ellie to turn up. Aware of how lazy she often could be, she might be a few minutes late.

To your surprise she actually arrived 10 minutes early, and for some reason you felt like there was a reason she did. Sitting opposite you, she gratefully sipped on the glass of juice, and offers you a small smile that brightens your day.

“How was your day?” She asks, genuinely interested, and you almost feel bad that nothing exciting has happened. You tell her about that one presentation you needed to finish, and that your professor had been a real pain once more.

While you talk about your day, Ellie places her chin on the palm of her hand, distracted by the color of your eyes, she has a hard time following what you were saying in favor of staring at your features.

“...today?”

She snaps back to reality, and furrows her eyebrows. Apparently you had asked her something, but she was unaware you had finished your story.

“Sorry, I was distracted, again?”

You smile, and lean forward. “How was my Negasonic teenage warhead today?”

There is a roll of her eyes as you mention her superhero name, and you chuckle at her reaction. She had decided upon the name before she met you, and felt embarrassed to tell you what it was.

“don’t call me that.”

“It’s cute!”

“Ugh…” She grimaces, and you laugh at her reaction. A name like such could really only be created by someone as edgy as her.

“I think it’s adorable, and it totally suits you.”

“You just like to embarrass me.”

“Maybe just a little.” Your heart skips a beat as she grins at your words. A toothy, bright smile with laughter erupting from her throat. These were one of the best laughs, were her eyes squeezed shut and giggles fell from her lips. Of course she had no shame showing her feelings towards you, but she rarely laughed as such, and you tried to memorize each time she did.

“Okay, but what would my superhero name be?” You ask with a wiggle of your eyebrows, to which she hums. Her pointer finger taps theatrically against her chin, and she crosses her leg under the table.

“I would choose something like Super doofus nerd. That suits you.” She offers. You give her an uncharming snort in reply, but laugh at the childish insult.

“Just because I like books I’m a nerd?”

“Nah, you’re just a nerd overall.” You shrug and agree, knowing your hobbies and interests could be considered geeky or nerdy. In the middle of your conversation Stan arrives at your booth and offers another round of drinks on the house, already placing a cup of coffee and a tea in front of the both of you. You both thank him, and he waves it off as he walks away with a coffee pot in hand.

“Also... “ Ellie starts, grabbing her backpack and starting to rummage through it. Curiosity seeps into your system, and your eyes try to peep whatever she’s pulling out of the bag. It takes her some time, but eventually she reveals a velvet black box. It’s almost as if she tries to propose to you, but as she opens the lid, a beautiful bracelet lays on the soft material.

There’s a little bead attached to it, engraved with both your initials.

With a gasp you reach for it, and immediately try to snap it around your wrist. The eagerness makes Ellie chuckle, and she helps you lock it, before you hold it up to the light to fully inspect it.

“This is by far the cheesiest thing you’ve ever done.” You retord with the brightest smile, removing every bit of sarcasm from your words.

“I know, I hate it, but i love you, that’s literally the only reason why I bought it.” She sips on her tea with such casualty you wonder if she even realises how much it means to you. To make sure, you place your hand over hers and squeeze it gently.

“Thank you… I really love it.”

She eyes the gesture, and a blush rises to her cheek. She huffs and hides the smiles tugging on her features. There was so much hidden appreciation for one another which had yet to be discovered, and you couldn’t wait on your relationship in the future. It really was as if a dream came true.

The edgy, badass, chick that you once met in a local coffeeshop, who had intimidated you at first and ended up as a cheesy dork who was unable to hide her blush from you. It was as if you had met your soulmate. Weird…

So as you stared at all her features, you thought about all the times you spent together. From your birthday party to her first time riding a rollercoaster, so much had happened in just 1 year.

You shrugged the weird feeling from your shoulders, and laughed at a story Ellie told you.

“I guess love at first sight does happen after all.”

#Fanfic contest

6 notes · View notes

gert4t4e · 3 years

Text

They sound a thousand leagues away

Inside its heavy wooden boards were names and dates going back more than a century. Hoffman.. He killed Joffrey. He was returning to the Stepstones with what few ships remained him. Betty's figure was modeled after Mae West's and her singing style taken from Helen Kane the "Boop Boop a Doop" girl. I don't know. There is no pecuniary interest in the owner to destroy his slave; the murder of his slave can only happen from ferocious passions of the master, filling his own bosom with anguish and contrition. “Words are wind, and the wind is always blowing at cizme din denim the Wall. That's not to say that her dresses are boring, when in fact, she knocked it out of the park in the episode where she just so happens to wear this to the same event that her incredibly handsome photographer ex lover is also attending. They guard the tomb with painstaking accuracy, constantly marching in a 21 steps pattern to honor the Unknowns, similar to the 21 gun salute. You caused your unoffending, unresisting slave to be bound hand and foot, and, by a refinement in cruelty, compelled his companion, perhaps the friend of his heart, to chop his head with an axe, and to cast his body, yet convulsing with the agonies of death, into the water! And this deed you dared to perpetrate in the very harbor of Charleston, within a few pendientes bulgari precio yards of the shore, unblushingly, in the face of open day. Maybe you're too absorbed in your kids. They sound a thousand leagues away. Sangakkara had been going smoothly at one end, but it was the other end that was causing the trouble. After mature reflection, I can assure this assembly it is my opinion at this time that the verdicts you have given the prosecutors against John Hunn and myself, within the past few days, will have a tendency to raise a spirit of inquiry throughout the length and breadth of the land, respecting this monster evil (slavery), in many minds that have not heretofore investigated the subject. Under the hill, Jojen brooded, Meera fretted, and Hodor wandered through dark tunnels with a sword in his right hand and a torch in his left. Many families, after having brought up their children in entire dependence on slaves to do everything for them, and after having been indulged in elegances and luxuries, have exhausted all their means; and the black people only being left, whom they must sell, point de croix chaletfor further support. His

cazadora vaquera tommy hilfiger

efforts to slip a hand through the manacle served only to scrap off more skin and leave his wrist slick with blood, and all his tugging or twisting could not pull the iron ring from the wall. Guide Ginny Bowman introduces a group to the haunted tour of the Chambers House Museum on Thursday afternoon. In moments both the stakes were engulfed in fire.. He called the

diadora focicipő

death tragic accident.. The drums kept him awake all night, he guessed, or someone has displeased him. Is the slave intelligent?—Good! that raises his price two hundred dollars. Abomination, abomination, abomination. People are good in Twerton and they have all be wonderful, I can't fault a single person."A fundraising page has also been set up to help the next door neighbours whose house was also left uninhabitable by the fire.According to Kim Wallace, who has set up a fundraising page for the couple living next to the Drew family, the neighbouring house was also severely damaged.. "A little timid," he said about his first thoughts about it. So fervently did he desire this that he offered all he had, that his prayer might be answered. Silence would have drawn notice. The seneschal’s chambers were on the second level. A real staple in our family. Thus, when His Airness returned to basketball зимни обувки adidas 2016 less than eighteen months later, his number was not available. First off, I am a sucker for a sports comedy and I am more prone to like movies that are more recent because they affected my life differently. Mozart sounds throughout the house, and in the evening the Clintons invite Huma Abedin over to hear recordings by John Cage after they have said their vespertime prayers to NPR Things Considered. Costs for these devices range from less than $100 to several hundred dollars, installed.. “I am dancing as fast as I can.” He wanted to laugh, but that would have ruined the game. Men love to complain about their wives and lords, he told me once. * * * If you are not opposed to the principles which it involves, unite with us, like honest men, and go home, and boldly meet the consequences. Alfred Berkeley III became president of the NASDAQ Stock Market in 1996, back when it was a helter skelter kind of place full of potential, but still with a few rogues in its midst. The Quakers did all by brotherly love. 2810 E. The great thing is they would pay for it. Perrien Jordan and 3M will appear Thursdays in a Motown program. No one should read camisa gris oscurothis and feel that only death gave them all this. Drive the back roads to see the kettle ponds where shorebirds congregate. This implementation of a series staple saw us using it at the beginning of a fight and little else. Police said the victim was not injured.. Her interest in JADE stems, she says, from the arrest and conviction of her estranged husband, white separatist Kevin Strom, for one count of child porn possession. Her son is gone, but his memory lives on through the hearts of many.. The information I have gathered little by little has completely reassured me. Inside 1964, des soldats et aussi Bowerman a construit une institution acheter et de faire des chaussures qui peuvent souvent tre plus lger pour chaque sprinter la situation difficile dans et ainsi, augmenter le risque pour sprinter une superbe offre de fa?on plus intensive. Two more Ghiscari legions took ship at Astapor. They traveled around the country until the mid 1940s, helping raise money for their Christian Israelite, self sufficient, commune type religious society founded in 1903 in Benton Harbor, Michigan. I offered her water and moistened her temples and her head. "Public accommodations are not supposed to discriminate in their services [and] goods, which would include a facility. Women Soccer Lydnsie Pratt Brock Port Women Lacrosse David Solis Air Force Academy Men Soccer Easton Hartman Sheridan College

diadora focicipő

Men Soccer Bradley Kinzer Colorado State (Pueblo) Football Tanner Rivera Drury College Men Cross Country Tim Mullin Western State Football Conifer Olivia Le Blanc Maine Maritime Women Lacrosse D Nolan Balbin Univ. ON DEMANDNBC on DemandWatch the latest full episodes of your favorite NBC series anytime and anywhere.Click for full scheduleLink to this videoEmbed this video(Published Tuesday, Feb. Ghost would have followed as well, but as fehér női bőr csizmathe wolf came padding after them,

air jordan aj4

Jon grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and wrestled him back inside. Of Denver Men Soccer Kyle Schulman Colorado Mesa Football Jonathan Erickson Benedictine College Football Cory Lange Colorado St.

0 notes

multsicorn · 6 years

Text

a very very long list of maybe wip’s

Since I'm working on setting up a binder of WIPs for myself - here are all fifty-nine of them. All are Check Please: mostly Jack/Parse, most of the rest Parse-centric, most of the rest Jack-centric, but a few random other fics too. Quite a few of these are only ideas, but most (~75-80%, at least) have anywhere between a few hundred and a few thousand words written, and some have considerably more.

Votes or encouragement as to which particular fics I should work on are very much welcome! And in fact a large part of the point of posting this. Pleaseee tell meeee what you want to seeeee.

JACK/PARSE IN THE Q

golden haze - Kent was Jack's first real friend, ever.

crash into me - Jack likes crashing into things. Kent likes being crashed into. Checking practice, kind of, Jack/Parse style.

one warm line - Parse wakes Jack up one night in the middle of their Q years, throwing pebbles at his window. They're going for a ride.

i'm so high - Jack and Kent hook up for the first time at a party when they're smoking weed, when the smallest touches feel like so much.

the beat of the tambourine - Parse picks up a girl for Zimms. For a threesome. Before they're together, back in the Q.

closing the guest room door - Alicia walks in on Kent blowing Jack. It's the first time it's happened, too. The Zimmermanns hadn't known anything about any of this, but now they do.

beneath the waves - There are two attractions in Rimouski: the Juniors ice hockey team, and a maritime museum. Jack kind of wants to live on a submarine.

edge of glory - Kent kisses Jack high on adrenaline and the win, feeling unstoppable. They only have thirty-four days together, but they start out pretty great.

ace kent fucks jack - Kent doesn't care that much about fucking, but he cares too much about Jack.

don't make promises - Kent visits the Zimmermanns after Jack's out of rehab, and Jack scares him even more.

JACK/PARSE CANON DIVERGENCE

find your lips in the streetlights - Kent and Jack run away from the mounting and dangerous pressure of the Q. And Jack almost dies from benzo withdrawal; nice move?

what's the multiplier for i love you - Parse has a career-ending injury at seventeen. He ends up going to Samwell, and starts managing the hockey team there before Jack even shows up.

one skate in front of the other - In which Jack wakes up from his overdose to find out he's still been drafted in absentia. To the Las Vegas Aces, third round.

different verse same as the first - Jack manages to get through Draft Day successfully. He ODs about a year later, at his first NHL awards; Parse still finds him in the bathroom.

JACK/PARSE POST CANON ISH

jackparse goat fic - Kent is outed during Jack's last semester at Samwell. It's a spark that makes Jack talk to him again: and again, and again, with starts and stops along the way.

bitty's bad bakery - Turning a profit doing something you love is really freaking hard. Just cause Bitty's good at baking doesn't mean he'll be good at running a bakery; and Jack can only finance it for so long, no longer. Cue Kent the accountant showing up to help.

max assholes au - In which Jack marries Bitty with Kent's spunk still in his mouth.

we're pining friends - In which Jack and Parse become friends again, and Jack's so not thrilled with Parse's boyfriend.

jackparse valentines - Jack and Parse on Valentine's Day, at eighteen and again at twenty-eight. Sweet but not too sweet. Just right.

developing - Jack likes taking pictures of Kent. Kent is curious about why.

may the bridges i have burned light my way back home - Jack's nearing thirty. His performance is flagging, his boyfriend broke up with him, and now he's at Kent Parson's thirtieth birthday party, wondering how else his life could've gone.

JACK/PARSE AFFAIR REVEAL VERSE

conference room fuck - You can't put Parson and Zimmerman in a room together. But if you do, you can't keep them from fucking.

you wouldn't cheat at cards (i would if i could) - Jack continues to cheat on Bitty with Parse throughout the summer after Jack and Bitty come out to the whole wide world. At the NHL awards, at Parse's summer place in New York, at Jack's birthday.

under the rainbows - After coming out to the whole wide world on live TV in June, Parse comes back to the Aces in September.

tinfoil crowns - A look at the meltdowns of Hockey RPF fandom, as Jack Zimmerman comes out, followed by Kent Parson, followed by Parse and Zimms getting back together, after all!? How crazy it must be when the tinhatters are right.

letting them see your hands - In which Shitty works through his feelings about Jack cheating on Bitty, and Shitty and Lardo discuss their relationship, too.

waking up to shape the land - When Jack comes to Vegas to play the Aces - and, by the way, see his boyfriend - he's woken up by Kent's nightmare.

functional exes - After Jack cheated on Bitty with Kent, and it all blew up spectacularly; after some damanged friendships were restored. Jack and Bitty are both there for Shitty's wedding. Bitty's a pro at keeping things civil; Jack… wants to apologize?

JACK/PARSE IN TOTAL AU'S

the hockey prince - Jack is a Prince; Kent was his best friend, and his right hand man. Till Jack disappeared in mysterious circumstances, and Kent may or may not be to blame.

ai romance - Jack is an AI that was always meant to drive a robot. Parse is, well, a parser. The part of a computer program that takes in and processes input, before it passes it on to the real heart of the program. A part which, it turns out, can't work right without its parser after all.

cult au - SMH is a cult house! That's why everyone there has to always be happy. Pies make people like you; flip cup is a good fill-in for a hippie ritual; and no wonder Jack cut off everyone he used to know when he joined.

cut the legs off the whales - Jack and Parse were soulmates. Jack died for three seconds, and now they're both stuck with half a broken bond, with all the luck at hockey - or at life.

JACK/PARSE NON-ENDGAME

you're still my patron saint - Jack's OD is fatal. Kent's got the biggest chip in the world on his shoulder. Hockey killed his boyfriend, and he wins the Stanley Cup, and then he comes out, furious.

progress report (i am missing you to death) - AKA 'five times Kent tells Jack "I miss you," and one time he doesn't.'

P(B)J

can you say menange a trois - Zimbits porn featuring dirty talk about the absent Kent Parson, because Bitty's 'Kent parson. Wow.' face reads easily as 'dead from too much hot.'

married in vegas - Jack and Parse get accidentally married after a Falcs/Aces game, cause you've just gotta have the trope when in Vegas. Starts with Jack still in love with Bitty, not sure where it was supposed to end up.

scalene - Jack and Parse aren't fighting over Bitty. They're fucking over Bitty. I mean.

awful threesome - Parse guilts Jack into letting him visit Providence after Jack and Bitty come out, and Parse gets hit with redoubled specuation. Then he hits on Jack and Bitty, cause why not, and they, surprisingly, take him up on it. This isn't a good idea for anyone.

PARSE CENTRIC GEN

butterflies fly away - Kent moves into Vegas. His sister flies out for a few days to help.

the one that saves me - When he first comes to Vegas, Kent's shit at taking care of himself. Maybe he can take care of a cat instead.

PARSWOOPS 2K18

parswoops in providence - Swoops is standing between Parse and the door to the worst life choices.

two aces in the hole - Parswoops in which Parse and Swoops are both ace (and get together, romantically), cause thinking about a dumb pun accidentally gave me feelings.

parswoops post year three - How can Swoops tell his best friend he likes guys, when said best friend is the only reason he figured it out? Also, still isn't over his last best friend yet.

PARSE/RANDOM DUDE IS THE AO3 TAG FOR PARSE/HAPPINESS

parse slash scraps - There's something nice, Parse thinks, about having a friend like Scraps, a friend who thinks you're the smartest, coolest, handsomest guy in every room.

by the scruff - Kent really wants to pick a fight. Alexei Mashkov won't give it to him. But… that kind of is a fight, right?

makes no difference who you are - Parse wishes on a star: to talk to Jack again. Chowder wishes on a start, that same night: to know what it's like to be on an NHL team. They wake up in each others' bodies, and have to find a way to get back.

a pretty good genie - Shitty is the best genie, okay. How'd Parse get one of those anyway.

players gonna play - In which Kent Parson bonds with Gus Kenworthy over adorable pet pictues at the Olympics, and then they hook up.

the aces' flyboy - In which Kent tweets a request for a date to the NHL awards, and picks up a local dude who responds.

MORE JACK CENTRIC FIC

quiet kid - Who the fuck prescribes benzos to a thirteen-year-old kid, anyway.

what if i ruined your life - Visiting Uncle Mario, in the late 00s, Jack hates Sidney Crosby. (I can't resist the fourth wall.)

jacklardo - Lardo hooks up with some dork named Jack at her very first college party. They're better off as friends; he was hot, though.

jackshit - Jack and Shitty hooked up as freshmen. What else do you want me to say.

tie down the jesses - The newest Falconer needs to learn a lesson. Needs to learn his place.

dirty boys - You're not supposed to look in the locker room. Don't bring it onto the team. Oh, and stay faithful to your boyfriend. But Jack's always wanted what he can't have.

ZIMBITS

i like when boys stop by - A rough fill-in of the conversation that decides Bitty's staying with Jack for the summer that surely must've happened.

how do you make it for real - the zimbits coffeeshop au for fandomtrumpshate that i've been struggling with for over a year now.

HOLSOM & RANSKOV

and go seek - When Ransom's crush on Alexei Mashkov turns out not to be unrequited, Ransom and Holster are pushed to reevaluate their relationship, too.

BITTY???

bitty in the echl - Being captain of a pretty decent NCAA team gets Bitty a surprise job offer post-graduation from the Worcester Railers. His relationship with Jack bends and breaks under the stresses of their dual hockey careers, but there's a familiar face in Bitty's new life. He never thought that he'd see John Johnson again.

#mults liveblogs writing #kent parson #jackparse #omgcheckplease stuff /#if i'm lucky i'll finish like... five or ten of these maybe #there's literally no way i'll ever write all or most #a handful! but which handful? we don't know!#*

11 notes · View notes

prettylittlelucygoose · 3 years

Text

Austin Visit 2 || Jucy

Continuation from [this.] Worked on through discord. Not finished yet.

@jt-padalecki

Jared —

Jared shook his head slightly at her words, honestly overly humored with the flirtatious and rather comfortable tone that she'd taken on. It was familiar in a way. And honestly she looked better this time around. His gaze trailed over her features and he could have sworn that this time she just looked better. Healthier. The last visit to Austin, she was barely clean at all, but she had some weeks on her this time. And it suited her, not that it was his place to tell her. "You really think that's the best idea?" A brow quirked and he shook his head, clearing his throat. "We can't do this.. you know it. And you know that if you keep tempting me, i'll eventually bite."

Lucy —

The woman knew her way around the house very well since she had lived there and found the cling wrap to cover her bowl to put in the fridge, "ill eat the rest of that for lunch tomorrow." Once the fridge was closed and she was no longer obligated to be in the kitchen she grabbed her water and started walking towards the living room, "Maybe that's what I'm hoping for," she said playfully. She moved over to the couch and sat down.

Jared —

Jared stayed in place, watching as she moved about the kitchen with a silence settling between them. When she was fully done, he followed her through the house and to the living room, glancing at the clock once more and figuring he had about a half hour before it was time to brush teeth and all of that. Settling on the couch a cushion away, he shook his head slightly and sighed, though the corners of his lips tugged into a slight smile. “You shouldn’t be though. We talked about this.” He turned his head to look at her. “So how are you doing? Happy the group home stuff is over I bet.”

Lucy —

She was trying to get him to a point where he called her his again but right now he acknowledged that she was Carlos'. "So happy. I hated the sober house so it was nice Los came back to LA. I'm glad to be done with program too."

Jared —

“I bet..” he nodded his head slightly and shifted on the couch so he was facing her a bit more. She’d mentioned more than once that she wasn’t a fan of the sober house in the slightest. “Do you feel better though? You look better. You look healthier.. more like I like you.” Sober, was the word he should have said but he didn’t like to remind her, didn’t think it’d be helpful

Lucy —

"I feel...all over the place. My meds are still being adjusted so I'm high and low and happy and sad..." she shrugged, "I'm just trying to heal." She put the bottle down on the coffee table and moved closer to him, turning so she was also facing him more. "I wish I could have some wine."

Jared —

His lips pressed into a thin line at her words and he nodded slowly. Obviously he didn’t quite get it, at least not to the extend he wished. “You’re healing, slowly.” He reached out, resting a hand on her shoulder and squeezing gently. “Rome wasn’t built in a day..just keep it up.” He sighed a bit and dropped his hand back down. “Not a good idea though, and you know it”

Lucy —

Part of her was mad she had fallen off the wagon after years but she had the support to go that long and beyond again. "I know. My problem is that I think I'm okay because it's not pills but it's a gateway. All I can have now is weed and even that is at specific times now. I can't have it whenever I want." She wanted to crawl onto his lap rest her head against his chest but she stayed where she was, "you never let me do anything fun though," she stuck her tongue out.

Jared —

Her words were valid, though hearing them was still a bit surprising. It wasn’t like she was always so, for a lack of better terms, stupid. She wasn’t always dependent on drugs. And to hear her talk to openly about her sobriety and talk about what could trigger a downward spiral, well honestly it made him happy. Her final words drew a laugh from him and he relaxed back into the couch. “That’s because your idea of fun could lead to a relapse right now.” He reminded her with a small smile. “I’m sure you’ll be able to drink one day, and smoke more freely. But right now you’ve just gotta be smart about it. Which you are.”

Lucy —

Her eyes roamed his body as he settled against the couch. "I'm not talking about just drinking. You won't let me do other things either." She had been there maybe a half hour and already she was skating around dangerous territory; she couldn't help it though. "So did you see the drama the other day? Paps caught me having lunch with someone and thought we were dating."

Jared —

He pressed his lips together slightly and shook his head. It was valid, but he had what he was pretty sure were good reasons for everything he did. The change in conversation drew his attention back towards him and he laughed a bit. “Oh I saw. It was pretty much everywhere.” A dark brow quirked up just slightly. “Always some kind of drama with paparazzi though, right? Least that’s what it seems like.”

Lucy —

"He's just a friend though," she wanted to make sure he didn't think she had other men in her life. "I'm fully committed to you and Carlos," she winked at him. "They're so frustrating. Do they come around the kids much?"

Jared —

He rolled his eyes slightly at her words but it was playfully, which he hoped the slight smile on his lips conveyed. He was actually fully satisfied with not irritating her and fighting right then, though he was sure the next day was going to be a different story. “Not much. I mean I think they know better than to get too close, doesn’t mean the occasional one doesn’t show up outside their school or snap a picture at the store.” He shrugged. “They’re all pretty cool with it. Adjusted by now I guess. I think it’s actually the fans that are worse, when it comes to that.” He shook his head. “No boundaries at all.”

Lucy —

She looked at him for a moment, "You're a good dad. You never get a break, I don't ever do my fair share...you're a really good dad." She couldn't do half of what he did, "You keep them safe and that's what matters."(edited)March 3, 2021

Jared —

It wasn't like what she was saying wasn't true, but still he'd never really been the best at receiving compliments. Though he supposed his kids were the number one thing that he could say he deserved them on. He gave everything for them, always boosted them up and tried to set them for a good future regardless of what was going on his personal life. He'd never forgive himself if he messed up in any way. "Well I appreciate it.. I try." He cleared his throat slightly, turning his head to look at Lucy. "And I appreciate the effort you're making. I know your kids will too. Sammy will."

Lucy —

The woman still didnt know if she was going to break down one day, not tell anyone, and just end her life, but in this moment she was trying to think of a future that involved her in her kids lives. "The girls are too old for me to keep bouncing in and out of their live...I need to be consistent. And Link shouldn't have to experience what Belle and Sam did. Or our next baby," she winked at him. She wanted him to kiss her so badly since she couldn't make the first move but unless he had been drinking she didn't think it would happen.

Jared —

Jared lifted his shoulders in a slight shrug at her words, ready to make his comment back before her final words caught him off guard and he laughed, head tipping back to rest on the couch as the sound rumbled out of him. "Oh for sure." He looked back towards her, winking back and shaking his head. "So be consistent. You're doing a good job now, just keep it up." He shrugged a bit, glancing at the clock before back to Lucy. "Do you want to tackle teeth brushing and pajamas? Or would you rather I did?"

Lucy —

In another life they were still married and she pictured herself moving over to him and kissing him lovingly and then getting up, saying she would handle it and he could rest. She couldn't do that whole thing now, but she stood up and stretched, her shirt lifting a little to reveal her belly button. "I'll go, you deserve a break."

Jared —

He allowed his gaze to catch on the sliver of skin that was exposed as she stretched, lingering a few moments too long before lifting slowly to meet her gaze. Giving a slight nod of his head, he offered a small smile. “That��d be nice, let me know when she’s good, I’ll come up for hugs.”

Lucy —

"Will do," she smiled at him and then started for the stairs. She loved her kids, she loved being around them, but the taking care of another person had never been her strong point. Doing it for a short time was no problem, but doing it every day had always been hard for her. "Time for teeth brushing," she said when she walked into Sam's room. The little girl refused at first but Lucy stood there with a stern look on her face, "Excuse me? You're a better listener than that. Come on, Samara, get to the bathroom." She helped her reluctant daughter brush her teeth and change into her pajamas. "Now we need to get your father," Lucy commented and the little girl ran off. "I do it!" she reached the top of the stairs and shouted, "Daddy!"

Jared —

Jared stood when Lucy started up the steps and headed through the house towards the laundry area, switching loads and pulling the clothes from the dryer into a basket. He got about half of it folded before the girls shout down the steps drew his attention. Heading out of the room, he started up the steps, smile stretching over his features. "Look at you! All fresh and ready for bed." He laughed a bit, scooping the girl up into a bear hug and earning a round of giggles as he moved towards the bedroom. Kissing the top of her head, He lowered her back down and tucked her in before standing as she requested Lucy be the one to read one story tonight. Glancing back at his ex, a dark brow quirked slightly. "Wanna tackle one story and then meet me out back?" It was a nice night, now that Texas seemed to get over it's bad patch of weather.

Lucy —

She was happy her daughter wanted her around more and she nodded to Jared. "That sounds good. How about you pick out the book?" She waited to be handed a book and then she sat down on the edge of Sam's bed and started to read. When she was done she hugged and kissed her daughter until she was satisfied and then went to the guest room to change into her pajamas. After putting on a pair of dark grey sweat pants and a white tank top she went back downstairs and went outside into the backyard looking for Jared. "Hey," she said when she found him.

Jared —

The night was a little bit cooler than the day, but not anything super wild yet. When the sun was fully down it would bring more of a chill to the air, but right then it was perfect. He started a little fire in the pit near the deck and dragged a few chairs out, sitting in his and scrolling through his phone, going over his upcoming schedule, when Lucy reappeared. Lifting his gaze towards her, he gave a small smile. "Hey, she settled in?" He doubted she'd take too much to go to sleep, she'd been real good lately at putting herself to sleep and staying down for the night. They were certainly over the rough sleepless nights

Lucy —

The cool air hit her and she wished she had also brought a jacket or long sleeved shirt but she also knew that her nipples were going to get hard and be super noticeable and she was hoping Jared would stare. "She's good," Lucy said and sat down in the chair next to his. Reaching into her pants pocket she pulled out a blunt tube and lighter, "Do you mind? This is the last one I can have today and I'd rather do it now than stop things later to do it." She didn't know where the night would take them but if they were having a good time she didn't want to stop things to go smoke. "And this way it's out of the garage," she added.

Jared —

Jared relaxed back into the chair and shook his head just slightly as she spoke, glancing towards the stuff in her hands. "No that's fine, I don't care." Honestly, it could have been worse. And he'd been more or less coming around to weed use as of lately. It was a natural thing, and, in the right cases, helpful towards recovery. Clearing his throat slightly, he sighed a bit and looked up, watching as the smoke from the fire billowed towards the sky. "I'm glad you're here, Lucy. Honestly. It'll be good."

Lucy —

Lucy lit the blunt and took a small drag; her lungs hurt a little from all the smoking and she didn't want to start coughing. His comment caught her off guard but she smiled as she looked at him, "I'm glad you're glad," she was used to him not wanting her around. She took another puff and even though she assumed he'd say no she still offered the blunt in his direction.

Jared —

He was honestly going to turn her down. But something, maybe it was just the fresh air and the bonfire, the feeling of them forming something solid again, made him say nod his head and reach a hand out. It wasn’t the first time he smoked, and it likely wouldn’t be the last, he just didn’t make it a habit often at all. Lifting it to his lips, he took a hit and, not surprisingly, coughed the smoke back out, clearing his throat and coughing again as he extended it back with the shake of his head. “Weak lungs.” He laughed a bit, leaning back in the chair and letting his gaze rest on the fire

Lucy —

To say she was surprised he took it was an understatement. The one and only time he had ever smoked with her was on their honeymoon and he had said he hated it and would never do it again. Taking it back with a small chuckle she said, "Cough to get off," and then took a hit before the blunt went out. "Coughing makes the high better." Lucy looked around the backyard and sighed softly, this was supposed to be her home, where she planted roots, and now she was only a guest for the night. "Try smaller puffs and holding it in longer." she offered some advice and handed it back to him.

Jared —

He held a hand flat, giving a slight shake of his head. “I’ll pass right now.” He’d probably gotten enough for a very light high and honestly that was good enough. The last thing he needed was to get completely stoned and end up doing something stupid. “So you and Carlos,” probably a stupid thing to bring up. “You guys are good?”

Lucy —

She nodded and took the blunt back to smoke more. "Let me know if you want more because I'm probably gonna keep smoking it now." Once someone passed she tended to monopolize it. She started coughing when he asked about Carlos. "Yeah, we're good. I think he's worried about you and me, but we're good. He seems to trust me..." she shrugged because she didn't even trust herself.

Jared —

He shrugged a bit at her words and cleared his throat slightly, turning his head to look at her as she spoke. "Worried about us..." He repeated her words, slowly nodding his head. Made sense, he would have been too if he was in that position. Sighing, he nodded. "Good. I'm glad its good"

Lucy —

"He treats me really well, he's so patient with me and he doesn't make me feel like I'm crazy. He sees beyond the addictions and bad habits and mental illness and sees me at my core. I should love him..I should marry him one day." She took a hit of the blunt and held the smoke in her lungs for a few seconds before blowing it out. "I wish you could be that patient with me..." if Jared had treated her the way Carlos does they never would have had as many problems as they did.

Jared —

Jared listened in silence as she talked about Carlos, honestly not sure he wanted to address the slight irritation that welled up inside of him at her words or if he was willing to just let the slight high he had tamper that down. It wasn't his spot to be irritated or jealous in the slightest. And yet he kind of was. Sighing a bit, he cleared his throat. "Yeah. Me too. But good. You deserve someone like him. He sounds great." he bristled slightly, pushing to his feet and grabbing another log to slide onto the fire.

Lucy —

The higher she got the harder it was to keep her eyes off of the man and she noticed his change in body language and she knew he was jealous. Good. "He deserves someone better than me."

Jared —

Tucking his hands in the pockets of his jeans, he shifted his gaze away from the flicker of the flames and towards his ex. “In your opinion. You can’t tell him what he does and doesn’t deserve. Does and doesn’t want. That’s not how real life works. I’m sure if he decides otherwise, you’ll know”

Lucy —

She flicked the ash off the blunt and took another hit, "Trust me, I'm very well aware I can't tell people what they want," everything always went back to some conversation she and Jared had in the past. She was quiet for a moment, "does he have a reason to worry?"

Jared —

He snorted just slightly at her words though he didn’t make any kind of comment. At least not until her last question. Lips pressing together he sighed. “Look I don’t know. I’ve already told you. I have no idea anymore. Nothings going to happen though. I’m not a fan of helping you cheat so.. I think you should just focus on your actual relationship”

Lucy —

Lucy had wondered why he asked her a lot about how things were going with Carlos and now it finally dawned on her; he wanted her to say things were bad or she was now single so he could act on things. "If I do that you run the risk of that relationship working out and be being with him forever, you're okay with that?"

Jared —

He pondered the question a few moments before nodding his head. Honestly, it was a difficult one but his answer was pretty much solid. “Yeah. If being with him keeps you healthy and makes you happy, then I’m perfectly content.” He shrugged, speaking honestly. It was hard sometimes, especially with the ups-and-downs that he and Lucy had in the past. But he genuinely just wanted what was best for her because that consequently meant what was best for their child

Lucy —

His answer was something she should have expected but it still hurt that he didnt say he wasn't okay with it. It still hurt he didn't want her enough to fight for her. A small gust of wind caused her to shiver and she felt her nipples press against the fabric of the tank too. "Okay," was all she could say because she didn't want him to hear her voice crack; she was trying not to cry.

Jared —

She was upset. That much was abundantly clear. And his lips pressed into a thinner line as he released a heavy sigh. “What do you want me to say, Lucy?” He caught the shiver and he shrugged his flannel off, leaving himself in a tshirt as he setting it in her lap before sitting again in his chair. “I won’t know if I actually want to be with you until we try it. And I’m not risking your happiness because I don’t know what I want.”

Lucy —

Putting the blunt in her mouth to free her hands she stood up and put the flannel on before sitting back down. She quietly scoffed when she took the blunt back out of her mouth. "No, you're right. I should be with someone who knows they want me." She couldn't look at him now.

Jared —

“You know, maybe you should.” He stood again, shaking his head. “Maybe find someone that hasn’t been through so much shit with you, that’s free to know they want to try again.” He shook his head and shifted slightly in the seat, feeling restless and irritated. “Because yeah, condemning me for not wanting to put our daughter in a bad spot again is the right thing to do”

Lucy —

"Im not condeming you," she finished the blunt and tossed it to the ground. "But it wouldn't kill you to think about you and not about other people. How would she feel if she ever found out her dad stayed single and miserable because he was afraid of hurting her? She'll blame herself."

Jared —

“When you’ve got kids you can’t just put yourself first.” He sighed slightly, leaning back in the chair and lifting both hands up to push through his hair before clearing his throat and dropping his hands to his thighs. “I don’t know what to tell you.” Finally, he turned his head and looked at her. “I want you. But I’m not willing to jump into anything. So that’s that”

Lucy —

She still felt sad but hearing him say he wanted her did make her feel a little better. Taking a deep breath she stood and moved over to his chair and sat down on his lap sideways so she could rest the side of her head on his chest. Maybe they couldn't do anything but she wanted to be closer to him and she loved listening to his heartbeat.

Jared —

He should have expected her to climb into his lap eventually, she was a rather determined type. And he imagined that pushing her off was expected. And yet he didn’t. He simply sighed a bit before resting his cheek against the top of her head, drawing in a deep breath and lifting an arm to rest over top of her, just soaking up the comfortable silence

Lucy —

The intimacy of this one moment calmed her down and she felt herself relaxing against him. "I always feel so safe in your arms," she said softly, not wanting to completely ruin the silence but wanting him to know how comfortable she was. "I wish you never let me go."

Jared —

The silence was comfortable, but it didn’t mean it didn’t still have an air of wrong about it. He didn’t speak for awhile, but eventually he nodded. “This is nice. We’ll have to go inside eventually though. Don’t want you getting too cold and sick”March 4, 2021

Lucy —

"This /is/ nice," she agreed and nuzzled her head against him. "You may have to carry me when that time comes, I'm very content here."

Jared —

A small laugh slipped past his lips and he sighed, sitting there for a few moments completely still and watching as the fire burned the wood down slowly. After a bit, he spoke up. "Probably time to get in and get to bed. I'll be up early to feed Sammy and drop her off." He glanced down at Lucy. "Want a lift in?"

Lucy —

That would always be the biggest difference between them, she could never change her life around to fit the needs of a child. She wondered if she ever would. "Yes please."

Jared —

At her request, he lifted her up, moving across the back yard and into the house. Slowly, he moved up the steps and into the bedroom, though he really considered stopping in the spare room, something told him she'd likely end up in his bed anyways. Setting her down, he stripped and moved into the bathroom to take a leak before crawling into bed near her and almost immediately passing out. He woke up the next morning far too early, and it took him a few seconds to actually realize what had woken him because the room was still dark and a glance at the alarm clock told him that it wasn't even near time to get up. But then his eyes adjusted to the darkness and he spotted the tear streaked face of the 4 year old as she crawled into bed, gripping her stuffed animal. "It's early, honey, whats-" The words caught in his throat as she crawled into the bed, her cheek resting against his bare arm and alerting him to the heat radiating from her. "Oh crap.." He groaned slightly. It was to be expected, she had a party with other kids, other adults, all sorts of germs. Remembering Lucy was behind him, he shifted slightly, tapping her. "Hey, get up, Sammy's got a fever." He shifted up to sitting and flipped the lamp on his side of the bed on, illuminating the room and pushing out of bed. "Stay here with mommy, I'm gonna go get the thermometer and see if we still have medicine." She didn't get sick often so he kind of doubted it.

Lucy —

Lucy was surprised he took her to his bed but she wasn't going to say anything and ruin it. While he was in the bathroom she got herself comfortable. Her phone was in the guest room charging and it felt nice to be away from it for the time being. It was like they were in their own bubble. She fell asleep soon after he did and groaned when he started waking her. It took a moment for his words to register and her eyes shot open, immediately finding her daughter in the dark, "Come here, baby bear, come lay down with mama," Sam moved over to Lucy and snuggled close to her mom. "If you need to run to the store and get some I can stay here with her." She wasn't awake yet but she was trying to be the other parent.

Jared —

Jared yanked a pair of sweatpants up his legs on his way out the bedroom, moving towards the bathroom down the hall where he kept most of the medical supplies. He found the thermometer immediately, however after digging through the cabinets twice he came up empty for medicine. Giving a slight curse under his breath, he shook his head slightly and moved back towards the room. "Sit still," He gave the gentle command to Samara as he squatted near the bed, reaching out and checking her temp. When it beeped and the screen flashed red, the frown on his features deepened. "102.1" He sighed. It wasn't quite high enough where she needed to go in to the doctors or the hospital, rule of thumb was generally 103/104 in healthy kids. His lips pressed together and he stood, eyeing Lucy. "The corner store should have some, it's about a ten minute drive. You good?" He asked, keeping his gaze on her as he moved back towards the closet and tugged a shirt over his head, followed immediately by a ball cap.

Lucy —

Lucy held onto Sam while Jared checked her temperature and then the little girl snuggled back closely to her mom. "Grab me a 5 hour energy or something please," she asked him and shifted the blanket so Sam was covered. "We'll be right here when you get back, most likely sleeping." She hoped he believed she wouldn't just disappear with their daughter while he was gone, especially when Samara was sick.

Jared —

Jared pocketed his phone and wallet, bending and pressing a kiss on Sammy’s head before kissing the top of Lucy’s and pausing. It was almost on instinct and he didn’t quite realize he’d done it until he started pulling back. “Sorry.. uh. Yeah. Five hour energy.” He cleared his throat and turned heading out and down to the store. He was back in about 25 minutes with a few necessities and made his way up the steps and into the bedroom with the energy, the medicine, and a small bottle of room temp unsweetened tea for Sammy “Hey,” he whispered the word as he walked in. “She awake?”

Lucy —

The kiss to her forehead caused her to smile, though she wasn't sure if Jared could see in the dark. "Be safe," she told him. Lucy never could fall back asleep, though she did rest her eyes for the duration he was gone. "No," she whispered, "She fell asleep a few minutes after you left. I'll wake her," the woman shifted slightly and started caressing the girl's cheek, "Wake up baby bear. Daddy's back with something to make you feel a lot better,"

Jared —

Setting the 5 hour down on the nightstand closest to where Lucy was, Jared pulled the hat from his head and rounded the bed, squatting near where Samara was slowly stirring and sitting up. "Hey. I got some medicine for your head, and a little drink for you." He wasn't sure whether to expect a fight from her or not, but surprisingly she took the medicine well and then, after a small sip of tea and making a disgusted face, she laid back down by Lucy. Sighing, he capped the meds and looked at the clock, making note of the time so he knew when she could have medicine again. Looking at Lucy, he shook his head slightly. "Looks like she'll be staying home today."

Lucy —

As much as Lucy wanted to work things out with Jared she knew this was more important. "Come back to bed then. Let's all try to get some rest while we can." Lucy was so used to sleeping with both her daughters in bed with her so this didn't phase her.

Jared —

Jared frowned a few moments, not really sure that he wanted to lay back down when he knew that Sammy wasn't feeling well. But also nothing could really be done for her at the moment. She'd gotten her medicine, it was really just a waiting game at that point. So he nodded and kicked off his shoes and socks before crawling back into the bed, lifting a hand to push some of the hair back from the little girls face before sighing and looking up at Lucy wordlessly.

Lucy —

It had been a long time since Lucy had dealt with a sick child and part of her wasn't in the mood for this, but this was part of parenthood and she knew it'd mean a lot to Jared to see her doing the right, responsible thing. "She'll be okay now that she had the medicine. We'll let her sleep now and recheck her temperature in a few hours. Maybe you should call her doctor and let them know for record." She would have called herself and left a message with the on-call doctor but she didn't know if Jared still took her to the same pediatrician.

Jared —

"Yeah I will, I thought about it on the way but they don't open until 8. I'll see if it goes down first. Don't want anyone to panic.. Should be fine." He'd dealt with his fare share of sick kids before. Clearing his throat slightly, he watched as Samara slowly shifted further into the bed and shut her eyes. "You don't have to stay here. if you want you can go to the spare room. Or drink your drink and.. do something else. Our talk is pretty much canceled today. At least the real lock in talk. We can still..talk." He'd said talk too many times. But honestly there was no going back to sleep at that point

Lucy —

"All doctors offices have an answering service and an on call doctor, you could have just left a message, but yeah, let's wait and see what happens." She had already assumed they wouldn't be doing their talk if Sam was home sick but she didn't think he'd encourage her to leave and go do something else. "I'm not going anywhere. I'm snuggling with my two bears," she smiled at him.

Jared —

"Well yeah, I know this." He shook his head slightly. "But because of who I am it alwaysgets escalated, doctor gets a call right away even if I say it's no big deal so.. I waited." And honestly, he appreciated the special treatment when it came to his kids but every now and then it annoyed him. He nodded at her words, gaze shifting back down at Samara as she fully fell back asleep. "I'm likely not going back to bed. I'm probably going to go make some coffee. Want me to bring you a cup?" He whispered the words

Lucy —

"That's a good thing if there's ever an emergency." She commented and shifted slightly so Sam wasn't on her arm anymore and she could move freely. She waited to see if Sam was going to wake up and when she didn't Lucy got out of bed. "I have to pee. Um, not right now. I had you grab me the 5 hour energy so I could just have that. I don't wanna explode my heart."

Jared —

“Oh yeah.” He laughed a bit, shaking his head and repocketing his phone. “See, need coffee.” He cleared his throat a bit and walked out of the room, heading down to start a pot of coffee and a few eggs for breakfast, deciding it was likely she’d sleep in a bit and that working out was a possible next move after he’d woken up more

Lucy —

After she went pee and washed her hands Lucy went back to the bed and saw she was alone with her daughter. She tried lying back down but couldn't fall back to sleep so she opened the energy drink and drank it down like the shot it was. She adjusted the pillows so Sam wouldn't roll off the bed and then she left the room. She went to get her phone and then started looking for Jared downstairs.March 5, 2021

Jared —

Jared liked to enjoy his coffee, rather than just gulp it down like he did on the days that he was running behind or just had a lot of stuff coming up and needed to get done. But he really preferred the slow down days where he could just step outside, even if the morning was chilly, and enjoy his coffee with the sunrise. Glancing back towards the sliding glass doors, he spotted Lucy and lowered his coffee cup from his mouth. Honestly, he'd expected her to go back to bed. Moving across the deck, he opened the door slightly and poked his head in. "I'm out here, but help yourself to some food or whatever. If you want to come out, grab the blanket from the couch, it's a little chilly out here."

Lucy —

When Lucy got to the kitchen she found it empty and stood thetr for a moment trying to think of which room she should next but then the sliding door opened. "I'll let you have your down time," she told him with a small smile and moved over the couch and sat down, covering herself with the blanket.March 6, 2021

Jared —

Jared nodded his head and moved back out onto the deck, drinking his coffee slowly and watching as the sun finally started to move over the tree tops. Sighing a bit, he moved back inside and refilled his cup before setting off in search of Lucy. It seemed like Sammy was still upstairs sleeping, so he didn't check there out of the risk of bothering her, and eventually found his ex in the living room. Settling in the chair near the couch, he reclined back a bit, legs lifting to rest on the coffee table. "If you're up for it, we could probably talk a little right now?" It was still kind of early, but he was wide awake. "Since Sammy won't be going to my mom's.. but she's asleep now." He shrugged.

Lucy —

While she was by herself she started lying down and dozing off but every few minutes her body would jolt her awake. Or maybe it was the five hour energy. When Jared entered the room she sat up a little more and rubbed her eyes. "If we did that we'd have to keep our voices down..no fighting..no yelling. We have to let the other person speak their mind, speak their thoughts and feelings and we cannot get defensive. We have to acknowledge and accept."

Jared —

He sighed a bit at her words but nodded his head, clearing his throat and shifting a bit so one leg rested over the other. "That's the point right? Can't yell if she's asleep. Waking up a sick kid is never fun. So it's good motivation." His gaze shifted back to her. "I'll let you go first.. I'm not really sure where to start"

Lucy —

She nodded in agreement, "yeah that would suck." She took a deep breath and repositioned so she was more comfortable. There were so many things that she wanted to say any other time but right now she was drawing a blank. She started to play with her fingers and after a couple of minutes she said, "For a long time you made me feel ugly."

Jared —

He really was working to keep himself together already, her words bringing him to shut his eyes. He had no idea why it was so hard to just talk to her. Then again, maybe it was because pretending the past didn't hurt as much as it did was just easier. Confronting it kind of sucked. "I'm sorry." He apologized, eyes opening and gaze turning to her finally. "For awhile, I think I actually hated you.. It's why I was a dick. Not that it's an excuse.. but it's a reason."

Lucy —

"Every time I asked you or accused you of hating me you said it was all in my head. I feel like you drive me more crazy than I already am. Exculding the last couple months you say one thing but do another; treat me another." She paused, "my whole life ive gone through self esteem issues and eating disorders and when we were married and you stopped wanting to have sex with me it made me feel bad about myself and then i stopped eating. When i got really skinny and you said i looked like a boy it made me feel even worse. I don't think you ever realized how your words cut me all the time."

Jared —

Her words drew a slight clench to his jaw and he shook his head slightly. Her words were valid, but it didn’t mean it didn’t irritate him. “Yes. And I apologized. I’m not the same person and I have no idea how to make you understand that because clearly showing you isn’t working.”

Lucy —

She took another deep breath because she didn't want to complain that he seemed to be getting defensive two seconds in. "I'm probably going to repeat things that I've mentioned before because I need to let it all go. I'm telling you everything and then we're moving on." She licked her lips, "Do you have anything you want to talk about? We should take turns."

Jared —

He nodded his head at her words but didn’t comment just yet. She’d said it before, sure, but it didn’t mean it irritated him any less. He didn’t like constantly being reminded of how terrible he used to be. Clearing his throat, he sighed. “Not really. The only thing I have is really your sobriety and health. Which you’re already working on. So.. I guess that’s it.”

Lucy —

She stared at him and wondered if she really did have more problems with him than he did with her or if he was keeping them to himself. "Have you been punishing me all these years for trying to kill myself?"

Jared —

His lips pressed into a thin line at her question and he thought about it. Silence stretched between them long enough that he almost expected her to speak up again but he finally answered. “No. I don’t know.” He shook his head. “I don’t think so. I was mad at you. Scared to be around you, scared to let Sammy be around you. I don’t think it was punishing you as much as it was protecting myself and her.”

Lucy —

She didn't want to cry but she could feel the pressure building. "If the situation was reversed and you felt that low that you tried to kill yourself and I left you and kept Sammy from you how would that have made you feel?" The tears were falling now, "I tried to kill myself because I felt worthless and I needed you to tell me that I wasn't and you left me alone instead. You weren't supposed to leave me alone."March 7, 2021

Jared —

“And here we go.” He sighed, jaw clenching tight enough that he felt a tick from the muscles. “You claim you want to talk stuff out,” he paused, forcing himself to keep his voice low. “But then you keep throwing it back at me. I understand repeating things helps you but smothering me with my mistakes when I’ve already apologized for them and keep trying to make them better only pisses me off.” He sat up, legs dropping from the coffee table. “I’m trying, Lucy.”

Lucy —

"Im not throwing it back at you. This is what's really affecting me. This is what I need to work through. I feel abandoned by you."March 8, 2021

Jared —

Jared sighed a bit, shaking his head and sitting back in the chair, feet still on the floor. "And you should feel abandoned by me. Because I did abandon you. I don't know what else you want from me." He paused, stopping to lower his voice again as he glanced towards the steps before back to Lucy. "I don't know what you want me to say. And I'm sorry, but I struggle with constantly being reminded that I'm a bad guy in your story. Even though it clearly helps you."

Lucy —

She shrugged but she didn't know if it was because she didn't know what she wanted to hear or because she didn't want to say what she wanted to hear. "I wanna go back in time and I want you to say. I want you to love me enough to stay. Your opinion of me has been the only one that's ever mattered to me. The way you've treated me the last few years has been really hard on me..." she paused and took a breath, "I still feel like your wife and it kills me that you don't feel like my husband."

Jared —

"Well that's unrealistic." He gave her a hard look. "Completely so. I can't go back in time and we can't change the past. Which is why it's so hard for me that you have to keep lingering on it. I get it, but it doesn't mean I agree." He cleared his throat, looking away again and letting his gaze rest on the painting above the fireplace. "I just want us to be able to get along, and sometimes that seems impossible."

Lucy —

"We don't get along because you don't understand me. Lately you've been getting better and I'm hopeful that things will continue to get better but there's a lot of baggage I need to unload and let go of. I do hold a lot of resentment and it's not healthy. I don't want to spend the rest of our lives feeling these negative feelings about the stuff we've been through. I wanted to spend my life loving you and having adventures with you. I don't know how to get out of that mindset. I don't know how to be just your friend. I don't know how to just coparent with you."March 9, 2021

Jared —

"Well then it's all something you're going to have to learn. You don't know how to do it because you've never had to do it." Going from being in a relationship to just being a co-parent with another person was definitely weird. But still possible. He did it with Gen and, while it wasn't ideal, it worked. And after awhile it became so normal that he honestly sometimes he forgot that it wasn't always that way. "Look I'm willing to do what you need to in order for you to get better and us to get better... But I don't expect it all to be solved that quick."

Lucy —

"I don't want to learn how to do it," she said softly. She didn't know how to make him understand that all she wanted was him. All she needed was to feel like she mattered most to him. "What was your first thought when you walked into the bathroom that night?"

Jared —

The conversation shifting back drew an uncomfortable feel to the air and he cleared his throat, looking away again. Honestly, he wanted to ignore her question. To pretend that he didn't hear it. Because that was going to be easier than this. Shaking his head, he cleared his throat and finally spoke up. "My first thought was that I was too late. That was probably my only thought, actually." His voice was much softer than before and he forced himself to speak up so she would hear him. "I was sure that it was my fault. And blamed myself. It wasn't until you stabilized that I actually got pissed instead of just scared."

Lucy —

Lucy listened to him and processed all of his words carefully before she spoke again. "And because you were pissed you decided to hurt me to show me how I hurt you?" The only thing that made sense to Lucy was that he was punishing her. "I almost took me away from you so you wanted me to know what it felt like to lose you and you left." That's what she repeated to herself daily for years. "We never had to break up..."

Jared —

He shrugged his shoulders a bit at her words. Honestly, it sounded right. It wasn't like he was actively trying to hurt her or 'punish' her. But that's certainly how it came out and honestly, he wasn't sure that he'd do it any other way if the chance presented himself. He thought he was protecting sammy, and his own heart. "We did. Because who we were, it needed to change. Growth needed to happen. I know I'm a different person than I was back then. And I feel like you're starting to be a different person.. shaping up into one at least."

Lucy —

She took a deep breath, "I tried to kill myself because we got into a fight and I felt like I was never gonna be good enough for you. I felt like you looked at me like you were disgusted with my appearance and just me in general. I didn't want to live knowing you didn't want me. The last few years have been a roller coaster of emotions for me because I don't want to live without you. Maybe I am a slightly different person but I'm not actually happy. I never should have married Ian. I never should have let you walk away from me and every day I live with this awful feeling of regret and I hate myself. I hate myself for not being better when we were together. I don't wanna talk about the future a lot anymore because I'm struggling to get through one day at a time."

Jared —

"Ok, well that's how it is sometimes. You're supposed to take it one day at a time until you feel like you can take it a week at a time, then a month, etc." Jared shifted his gaze back to her. "That's literally all I can keep pushing to you is growth. It's important. And it's all you really need to focus on. You don't have to live without me," He sat up further, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. "I'm here, trying just like you."

Lucy —

He just didn't seem to understand what she meant and she didn't want to fight with him so she took another deep breath and stood up from the couch, "I need a break from this," she started towards the stairs, "I'm gonna go check on Sam."

Jared —

Shaking his head, he leaned back in the chair and stayed silent as she got up and moved towards the stairs. They always seemed to go round and round and he wasn't even shocked at that point. Sighing, he stood and walked into the kitchen, pouring a second cup of coffee, leaning against the counter and glancing at the clock, waiting and listening up the steps.

Lucy —

Lucy walked towards the master bedroom and took some calming breaths. They were still on two different pages about some stuff and she didn't know how to say certain things because he would shoot them down anyway. When she saw that Sam was still sleeping she went back downstairs and into the kitchen, opening the fridge and seeing if anything caught her eye to munch on.

Jared —

He watched her as she moved into the kitchen, but didn't say much. Instead, he focused on drinking his coffee and moved out towards the dining room as she opened the fridge. Settling at the table, he grabbed his phone out and started scrolling through it, replying to some messages

Lucy —

When she didn't find anything that interested her she closed the door and opened the freezer. Spotting waffles she took the box out and walked over to the toaster. "Most of the time I feel like I won't ever feel whole until we're back together."

Jared —

He glanced up towards the kitchen as she spoke, being able to see her fully thanks to the open concept. Clearing his throat, he leaned back in the chair. "And I told you that we can't even think about getting back together until I know you're whole.. better. safe. I can't risk Sammy like that... or my own heart."

Lucy —

She opened the box and put two waffles into the toaster, "I'm not whole because we're not together. You were my everything and you walked away, you left me alone. Ian, Carlos and everyone else I've been with lately has been me not wanting to be alone. My husband, my teammate, my support system left me alone to figure things out for myself and I can't do it by myself anymore. I can't use other people in hopes someone will make me feel the same way you do." She walked back to the freezer and put the box away.

Jared —

It honestly felt like they always seemed to go right back to the same conversation. And honestly he wasn't even sure what to say anymore. Because he was pretty sure he wanted her. In fact it was almost a confirmed thing that if she was healthier he'd have already been back with her. But she wasn't and it was risky. He couldn't just think of himself. He had kids. "But you're not getting what I'm saying." He put the coffee cup on the table, sighing and standing, walking over towards her but stopping to lean against the counter. "I can't let myself love you again until I know that you're ok. So we're at an impasse"

Lucy —

She grabbed the butter out of the fridge and then searched the cupboard for the peanut butter. "And you're not hearing me that I may never be one hundred percent okay and it's not fair that you're making your love for me conditional. That's the problem I've always had with you. Why can't you just love me unconditionally? No family is perfect but you're basically saying I have to be in order for us to be a family again."

Jared —

Frustration etched it's way through his body and he sighed heavily, shaking his head. "I'm not saying you have to be perfect. And I know you're not used to putting kids first, but I have to. I'm asking you to be healthy it's different. I can't just jump into a relationship or even try a relationship if I think it'll impact the kids in a negative way. And right now I think it would because I don't think we're ready."

Lucy —

"Life is so short and you're just wasting time," was all she could reply because if she continued to talk she was going to raise her voice. She was feeling so frustrated that she wasn't getting what she wanted. When the waffles popped up she took them and started putting the butter and peanut butter on them. She put everything away then took the plate to the table to sit down and eat.

Jared —

His arms crossed over the broad expanse of his chest and he sighed, shaking his head slightly as he moved into the living room, coffee cup forgotten in the dining room. Tugging shoes back on, he walked out onto the front porch, gaze skimming over the landscaping and sighing heavily, coming back in about 10 minutes later and, after kicking his shoes off, walking back into the room to grab his coffee cup wordlessly.

Lucy —

She ate her waffles alone in silence while he was outside doing whatever it was he was doing. She couldn't understand why he was so okay with the possibility of them never getting back together and she couldn't understand why she didn't mean more to him. Why he couldn't be willing to mend the relationship and help her work through the rest of her stuff. When he walked back in she was at the sink washing her plate and knife.

Jared —

That was the problem with them, stubbornness. Both of them would rather do anything before admitting they were wrong or cave a little. And maybe that was why they didn't last. Maybe they were never meant to. But that seemed like too heavy a conversation for that early in the morning still. Taking a seat at the island, he frowned a bit, clearing his throat. "So..." But he had nothing else to add, he lifted a hand to push through his hair. "We can probably consider our talk over then."

Lucy —

They hadn't really accomplished anything but Lucy knew that this was a long shot anyway. She felt like she was always going to put more effort into fixing them than he would and she didn't want to waste her energy anymore. "If that's what you want." He was always in charge anyway so if he didn't want to talk anymore it wasn't like she would be able to get him to.

Jared —

"It's not what I want, it's how it clearly has to be." He sighed, hands resting flat against the top of the counter. "We don't get anywhere with talking. Like I said, we're at an impasse." He shrugged his shoulders. "I want you, but I refuse until I'm convinced that you're better because I'm trying to be smart and protect myself and honestly you too. And you wont get better until you have me. I don't know what else you want me to say."

Lucy —

"There's nothing else to say. You can be alone the rest of your life with your stubbornness and I'll move on with Carlos. It is what it is." she turned off the water and grabbed a towel to dry her hands. "I'm never gonna be what you want, I'm always gonna too screwed up for you," she felt the pressure building in her eyes again and she suddenly wished she could drink. Why didn't he love her enough?

Jared —

Standing, he threw both hands up in the air and sighed, dropping them down with a 'clap' noise against his thighs. "God dammit, Lucy. You literally always have to make me a bad guy." He glared, shaking his head and looking away. "Why do you twist every single thing I say? I say I want you, but we won't work right now and I SWEAR you hear "i hate you, we'll never be together". And thats not it at all."

Lucy —

"What I hear is that you want me to meet certain requirements and that's not love." She wasn't trying to fight with him, she never was, she just wanted him to want her as much as she wanted him, but he never did and he probably never would.

Jared —

“Oh my god. You act like I want you to do a double backflip. All I’m asking is that you be fucking healthy.” His voice raised and he threw his hands up again. “Yeah we can’t do this. Because you’re impossible.” He turned and stormed out of the living room, starting up the steps to where Sammy was.

Lucy —

"I was fucking healthy for two fucking years and it meant shit to you! How much healthier do you need me to be?" she shouted after him but stayed where she was because she didn't want to yell near their daughter so she decided not to follow him.

Jared —

Jared rolled his eyes at the top of the steps. She didn't seem to understand that the past was the past. That he was a completely different person back then. But it didn't matter. He had no intentions on caving. It had been a little over an hour since he'd given Sammy meds, so he squatted near the bed where she still snoozed and ran the thermometer over her head, nodding just slightly at the beep as the screen told him it had gone down, still a fever but down. Moving into the closet, he quietly grabbed other clothes and a towel for a shower. He planned on working out and then showering downstairs to let her keep sleeping. Moving out of the room and down the steps, he moved through the house. "I'm going to workout. I'll leave the garage door open and be able to hear when she gets up." He announced as he moved out that way, though honestly he didn't stop to see if she'd heard him.

Lucy —

She didn't know what to do with herself but she knew she didn't want to go upstairs right now. She went back over to the couch and sat down again until he came back down and said he was going to work out. She thought about leaving him alone but her anxiety was starting to bother her so she went upstairs to grab her peace purse and then went to the garage. She didn't say anything as she moved over to a spot to sit and started rolling her blunt. It wasn't until she was done and started smoking it did she finally speak, "What exactly do you mean by healthier? You saw me sober and doing intense therapy for years, I was the best I've ever been, and it wasn't enough for you. What exactly are you waiting for? What are you looking for from me?"

0 notes