#...you can see 'logically' and make assumptions about what the other person 'needs'

[uncanny-tranny]

I've talked before about how the way people treat suicide can be unintentionally devastating to the suicidal person, but I don't think I really ever said how to avoid that.

Speaking about suicide in how selfish it "is" ("think about how you'll transfer your pain to your loved ones!") might seem like a way to put logical sense into the suicidal person, but, honestly? It runs the risk of massively increasing their shame and guilt about being suicidal. Suicide is not inherently a revenge fantasy or a way to "get back" at someone's loved ones, so when the suicidal person is treated like a criminal of a "crime" they haven't even committed yet, you can imagine how unhelpful that can become.

Instead, if you want to point out how cherished your person is, frame their relationships as something they can keep fostering.

"Your cat will miss you :(!!!!" becomes "you and your cat seem close, right? I'm sure it's beautiful having a close friend like that!" and maybe include ways that they and their cat are close and meaningful to each other, tailored to that relationship.

That's only one example, but when you shift the focus away from why that person should repent and feel guilty for being suicidal, you can instead focus on why they would live for that reason. See how you can frame that as a positive? Whatever is keeping that person tethered should never be used as a bludgeon, I think, because then you're taking away why they're living, the positivity of why they are here. Whatever they are here for should be remembered often and honoured.

#mental health #mental health advocacy #mental health support #suicide #suicide tw #(after this i'm going to rant about being told the unhelpful narrative i included above) #when i was younger the thing i was told the most was that suicide would only transfer my pain to others... #...and is that true? maybe. was it helpful? no. #why was that unhelpful? #because i started using that as yet ANOTHER reason to feel guilty and to lash out against myself... #...because that didn't magic away my suicidality like it 'should have'... #...and that was ~obvious~ proof i didn't care enough about my loved ones to keep them out of harms way... #...and it can be really hard not to do that (give advice like that) because if you're not the suocidal person... #...you have the luxury of thinking without the burden they are labouring under... #...you can see 'logically' and make assumptions about what the other person 'needs' #it's just frustrating because i know that people like this want to help but i worry about *how* they are helping... #...in the sense that i want their efforts to actually help their person and bring them closer

[sexyandhedonistic]

How to Become the Most Iconic It Girl in Your Reality

A Guide to Bring Your Dream Self to Life

“You are already that which you want to be, and your refusal to believe this is the only reason you do not see it.” Feeling is the Secret Ch. 1

I. Introduction ✧

Hello, my loves! This guide will help YOU become the person you have always dreamt of being as the starring role of your reality. We’re going to cover so much so I hope you’re ready to bid farewell to the person you used to be and get ready to transform into the most desirable version of yourself yet. Whether you aspire to be an it girl, it boy, it person or it god, whatever your preferred title is, if you desire to be other than what you currently are, this guide is for you.

Note: this was written through a law of assumption lens so if you’re looking for a glow up post that tells you to eat fruit and cut off toxic people this is not the one. If you haven’t read my guide about the law of assumption or are new to it I strongly recommend you read that one first before reading further, as everything written later on will make much more sense that way.

A. What’s to come.

The comprehensive purpose of this guide is to help you become the person you have always dreamt of being and to remind you that you no longer need to be unhappy with who you are because you get to create your own reality, meaning that you get to define yourself. Not your environment, not your peers, you. Your upbringing may have persuaded you of the fact that you are undeserving of anything you could ever desire, but you don’t need to go another day feeling insecure, unloved and miserable. Life is your creation. The days of you being confined to the image others have imposed unto you are a thing of the past now.  I don’t know who you were before you opened this guide but that person isn’t you anymore. From this point on, you have been an icon from BIRTH.

B. Breaking down the terms “iconic” and “it”.

Before we start, let’s define what an iconic it girl is first.

To be iconic means to be impactful. What makes an icon an icon is the fact that they don’t live up to standards or expectations because they live by their own rules and are not afraid to deviate from the conventional. The difference between an icon and a non-icon is that icons aren’t all talk, they ARE about it. 

“It” refers to a prominent and commendable quality in an individual that evokes intrigue and admiration, especially one that makes said individual spectacular or exceptional. The it factor is subjective because different qualities instigate intrigue across different people. In the case of this guide, the IT factor will ultimately be up to you to define.

If we fuse both terms together with the law of assumption in mind, an iconic it girl is one who’s in total control of her reality. She’s a sovereign, she’s above everything and everyone and nothing can cause her to waver in her conviction. She’s the center of the universe and nothing can ever challenge that thought in her head. She calls the shots and she does what she wants. An iconic it girl is a trend setter. She doesn’t follow trends nor standards, she creates them. Nobody tells her what she can or can’t do and nobody tells her who she is because she has an established conception of herself.

C. Why be an it girl?

It girls tend to be the girls you either want to be or be with because they seem to have it all: wealth, beauty, sex appeal, allure, social circle, relationship, achievements and/or an interesting lifestyle. You see these girls on social media and you covet the lives they lead but you feel suppressed by your current circumstances because reality conditions your desires. If you want to change your appearance, you must be rich and if you want to be rich, you must work hard. If you want to be extroverted, you must change your personality and if you want to change your personality, you must step out of your comfort zone. That’s the reality of life because life operates by logic. But, guess what? You are not limited to what we once accepted to be the “reality of life”. We are infinite beings capable of everything we could ever desire in this world. Anything someone else is or has can also be you/rs and in this guide I’ll explain how you can.

Now that we have established what an iconic it girl is and why we can aspire to be one, we will now proceed with HOW to do it and more importantly, where it all starts.

II. Conception ✧ of self.

“It is our conception of ourselves which frees or constrains us.” - No One To Change But Self

Self concept is how you see yourself in relation to the world and how you see the world in relation to you. All the assumptions you carry about the two comprise your conception of self, which as a result fashions the experiences you have in your world. From the way people treat you to the way you treat yourself, all of it has originated from your assumptions which harvested your state which has become part of your consciousness (what you know to be a fact at this very moment). Whether your goal is to manifest being an it girl or anything else, it always goes back to changing your self concept first, which is nothing more than a state.

A state is an attitude of mind comprised of beliefs (assumptions) and when we desire to change our self concept, we adjust our state of consciousness. You may not feel exceptional nor as if you have the it factor as of right now and that is credited to the contents of your state of consciousness. If you want to become an iconic it girl, you must first change your state into one of an it girl. How do you change states? Through feeling, by I AM.

A. I AM.

“I AM wealthy, poor, healthy, sick, free, confined were first of all impressions or conditions felt before they became visible expressions. Your world is your consciousness objectified. Waste no time trying to change the outside; change the within or the impression; and the without or expression will take care of itself. When the truth of this statement dawns upon you, you will know that you have found the lost word or the key to every door. I AM (your consciousness) is the magical lost word which was made flesh in the likeness of that which you are conscious of being.”- Your Faith Is Your Fortune Ch. 6

I AM is a declaration of self through what you are aware of being. You are incapable of speaking about yourself unless your statement begins with I AM. Manifesting becoming an it girl is not about acquiring something, it is about being the person who has that something through whatever comes after I AM:

I have money -> I AM [in the state of being] wealthy

I have perfect grades -> I AM [conscious of being] a stellar student

I have a partner -> I AM in a relationship

“Become identified with that character and feeling and you will be amazed how quickly you will realize your dream. The only sacrifice you are called upon to make, is to give up your present concept of self and appropriate the desire you want to express.”

B. EIYPO.

"Blind man sees the world objective to himself, something detached from himself. When man begins to awake he sees everything subjectively related; everything he meets is part of himself, and what he does not now understand, still he knows that it is related by affinity to some as yet unrealized force in his own being." - The Pruning Shears of Revision

Everyone is you pushed out accounts for the notion that whatever we think or assume of ourselves is pushed out into the world and reflected back to us. This means that the people around you will see you the way you see yourself and treat you accordingly. We manifest 24/7 through our established assumptions, so whether you have accepted as a fact that you are loved by everyone you meet or you aren’t very likable, your circumstances will evince that. However, that is not to say you are not entitled to feel upset when someone disrespects you. Although this may be a difficult truth to accept, the purpose of acceptance of it is to feel and realize that we are above what people say or how they treat us rather than to feel inferior because of it. So, how do we take this concept into consideration when we aim to become an it girl? We simply accept it as yet another facet of our realities that we are in control of. How do you get people to stop seeing you as the person you no longer want to be anymore? By changing self first. When you begin to see yourself as an it girl, the world will see you as one as well.

"There is no one to change but self. All you need to do to make men and women holy in this world is to make yourself holy. You are incapable of seeing anything that is unlovely when you establish within your own mind's eye the fact that you are lovely."- No One To Change But Self

III. Imagination ✧ Optimize your creative power.

“Everything in your world that you behold, though it appears without, it is within, in your imagination. And this wonderful imagination of yours is Christ Jesus. Imagination is the actual habitation of every created thing. No matter what you see in the world, it springs from your imagination. So that's where you go, that's the workshop, the garden of God.” - The Pruning Shears of Revision

A wonderfully comforting aspect of the law of assumption is that we all possess the inalienable gift that is to be able to grant upon ourselves whatever it is we desire to have, do or be. No matter what it is that you want, be it factual or fictional, existent or nonexistent, you can have anything. It is possible to become the person you have always wanted to be due to the lack of limitations in imagination. If you can think it, you can become it. Whether you desire to look like someone, have a relationship that mirrors the one in your favorite k-drama with your celebrity crush or be exactly like your comfort character, I could go on and on with examples of whatever it is you can have, do or be because when I tell you that you are a limitless being, I mean it wholeheartedly.

I must emphasize and drive this point home. All is possible in the world. Every possible desired life aspect you could ever fantasize about in your imagination exists because creation is finished. Whether it’s your dream home, career, income, accomplishments, possessions, relationship, friend group, physique, personality, lifestyle whatever it is you dream of having is possible to be conscious of because there are a myriad of states for us to choose from. That state already exists like a suit that is waiting for you to wear it until it becomes a natural part of your consciousness.

Because of this, it naturally makes sense to acknowledge that we no longer need to be neither humble nor jealous of another. If we know we can have absolutely anything in the world, even something already in the possession of another, why would we?

With our wonderful human imagination on our side, we can transcend the limitations that surround us. Whether you desire to get accepted into an ivy league university two years early with a 2.1 GPA or eat endlessly without gaining a single pound and jeopardizing your health, your limitless self is capable of becoming conscious of it and more, so let your imagination run free devoid of any restrictions when you define your it girl. The presentation of any circumstances do not and will never matter. To be is as simple as asking yourself whether or not you want to be it.

IV. Inspiration ✧ Defining your it girl.

Now we’re getting to the fun part of this post because you get to use your creative power: imagination. Remember a few sections ago when we discussed what the IT factor is? This is where you get to determine what IT is. Let me remind you again, your idea of what an it girl is is subjective, so it won’t be exactly like someone else’s definition. It girl is not a mold in which you are expected to fit into. Whether you want an active socialite nepo baby city life or a secluded pastry-making book-reading cottagecore life, doesn’t matter. This is all about who you desire to be. With that, let’s get down on how to determine what your it girl self looks like.

A. Who do you want to be like?

What qualities in a person would make you perceive someone as admirable or inspiring? Hard work? Being multifaceted? Do they have a personality you wish you had?

Think of people you deem iconic or who you look up to and why you perceive them as such. Are they someone who’s successfully pursued a personal goal of yours? Is their career full of achievements?

Don't condense your inspirations to people, you can also take fictional characters into consideration. Whether it’s Maddy from Euphoria, Blair from Gossip Girl or Pooja from Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham, think of the characters from your favorite films and tv shows for more ideas.

You can also consider some of the most popular archetypes across social/media such as the femme fatale, the socialite, the siren, the beauty and brains, any archetype that possesses a lifestyle or aura that you would like for yourself can also be taken into consideration.

B. Which trains would you like to possess?

Beautiful, magnetic, mysterious, seductive, desirable, alluring

Extroverted, fun, trend setter, admired, confident, charismatic

Intimidating, unapologetic, bold, unique, center of attention, 

Kind, soft spoken, empathetic, nurturing, humanitarian

Intelligent, articulate, ambitious, hedonistic, successful, perfectionist 

C. What are some interesting qualities/assumptions about you?

Always the life of the party

Speaks multiple languages

Excels at everything on the first try

Has a commanding presence

Loved by everyone and full of admirers

Everyone you develop an interest in always pursues you

People find you alluring and inspiring

Bearer of the Halo effect - receives advantages and special treatment just for being gorgeous 

Mastered or proficient in a specific subject/sport/language/instrument

Art connoisseur / literature, films, fashion, music, photography

Knowledgeable across different subjects / history, science, interior design, fragrances, wine, etc.

Knowledgeable in sophisticated fields / law, politics, economics, finance

Expert at a specific hobby or activity / chess, bridge, painting, sculpting, skating, singing, dancing

Skilled at / sewing, cooking, baking, knitting, makeup, styling, coding

D. Combine it.

Once I had an idea of what I wanted my new self to be like , I would refer to scenes in tv shows when a character is being introduced in third person as if they’re reading a profile about them. They don’t just name the character, they’ll list their background, their personality, what they do, what their interests are, etc. and then twist this for myself and imagine how I would like another person to describe me. I’ll list an example of what that would look like below:

[Note: to stay on theme I will be providing an it girl example, make this your own!]

One word to describe her? Extraordinary, but she’s too much to even conceptualize in a single word that it almost feels disrespectful to her. She either inspires you to be at her level or mortifies you for not being at her level. She's influential and enticing, opulent and godly. She has sky-high standards and smells like Tobacco Vanille. She always gets what she wants and doesn’t take no for an answer.  She studies hard in the daytime and attends prestigious social gatherings in the nighttime. She’s a polymath with an IQ of 168 who knows a little about every subject. Whether it’s foreign languages, interior design, pastry making or art, she’s full of knowledge and constantly teaches you something new. She’s innovative and always formulating progressive ideas which also makes her a trendsetter.  Whatever she does whether it’s a hobby or putting an outfit together she always owns it in her own unique manner. Because of that, her presence captures the attention of everyone in the room without her even saying a word. Her magnetic aura and sultry gaze make her irresistible to anyone who locks eyes with her. Men go crazy over her even though they know she’d never look twice at them. She’s witty and fun to be around.  She’s unlike anyone you’ve ever met before. In fact, you could copy her personality and style down to a T and you still would not be able to capture her essence. You can’t get her out of your head because her beauty, passion and determination make her unforgettable. 

Now that you have an idea of who your new self is, let’s talk about how to dump the old self.

V. Immolation ✧ Say goodbye to the old story forever.

“Man is not willing to outgrow, [and] yet he wants other things than those he has. But if you remain in one state, you will forever have to suffer the consequences of not being in another state. (From the “Hermetica”). If I remain in the state of poverty, I must suffer the consequences of not being in the state of wealth.” - The Art of Dying

A. No one to change but self (concept).

“Heretofore I thought I could change others through effort. Now I know I cannot change another unless I first change myself. To change another within my world I must first change my concept of that other; and to do it best I change my concept of self. For it was the concept I held of self that made me see others as I did.” - No One To Change But Self

I started this guide with self concept for a reason. If you want to create a change in your life you must first begin with self . As within, so without. An inner change must precede an outer change because we do not experience what we want, we experience what we are. Any attempt to change our worlds without changing ourselves is a mere delusion because the world will forever reflect back to us that which we are conscious of being. You want the world to know that you’re an it girl? Feel yourself to be an it girl first.

B. Forgiveness.

“You must learn to distinguish between the eternal human who occupies a state, and the state itself. This is the only means to forgiveness.”  - True Forgiveness

Forgiving is forgetting and forgetting is letting go. When you are able to feel yourself to be who you want to be, you let go of who you used to be. You no longer have to be somebody you don’t want to be because a change of state is always instant. Every day is a new day and every moment is a new moment. If you are currently a miserable person and then you decide you are not then you are no longer a miserable person because you chose to not identify with it. You are not your state and you cannot be affixed to any state you don’t want to occupy. You will always have the option to embody any state you would like to occupy. You can shift that immediately through forgiveness and intention. Through forgiveness, you create the severance between the state you were formerly in and the state of an it girl. 

C. Regret no more. 

“Do not waste one moment in regret, for to think feelingly of the mistakes of the past is to re-infect yourself.” –  Feeling is the Secret

I’d like to take this moment to tell you that regret doesn’t need to be a thing anymore because you can revise the past. That hobby you wanted to pursue but gave up on? Your GPA that you can’t go back and fix? The best friend you miss? Do you remember when you wanted to start drawing but then you stopped? Or when you did ballet when you were younger and never continued? Remember when you started learning Spanish and then gave up? You don’t need to feel regretful anymore because you can revise all and reshape the past to be in harmony with the it girl that you are. Whether you wish you had grown up wealthy or with a specific skill which would later become your passion, absolutely every aspect of your life can be adjusted. There’s no need to resent the past because it is not set in stone.

D. Let go of the external.

I urge you to not let anything outside of you define you or your life. Whether it’s the tarot deck, the tea leaves or a birth chart, none of those sources have a say in what your life looks or will look like. There’s no such thing as a predetermined fate for you. Every single aspect of your world is malleable at your command, so give up the idea that there’s any other force in the world capable of interfering with your desires.

VI. Reincarnation ✧ The birth of a new you.

“You must this night – not tomorrow – learn the technique of writing your own obituary and so completely die to what you are that no man in this world can tell you where you buried the old man.” - Consciousness is the Only Reality

A. A newly acquired mentality.

It’s time to step into your power and see yourself as the GOD that you are. You no longer need to live by the limitations the world has convinced you exist. You don’t need to do or be anything/one you don’t want to do/be and more importantly you do not need to settle for anything that doesn’t live up to your expectations. If you don’t like something, it doesn’t need to be a thing. Think about it being as simple as blocking someone, you are not gonna annoy me in MY reality.  Starting today, you get to decide who you want to be and who or what gets to be a part of your life. Again, this is YOUR world, YOUR reality and everyone else is simply living in it. Why should you ever worry your gorgeous self about anything not going your way if this is your world? You’re the one on the pedestal and whatever you say must go. 

Imagine telling a person exactly that, This is your world and everyone else is simply living in it. We are at such a huge advantage with the law of assumption because you don’t even need to be concerned with the course of action, you just need to focus on being (I AM). When you talk to people through the confidence of knowing that every single one of your goals is absolutely achievable, because through the law of assumption they always are and always will be, it is very easy to appear as confident to the average doubtful person. Everyone around you carries the idea with them that failure and rejection are always possibilities. You’re not like them, though. You’re completely limitless. You can excel at whatever career you want to pursue, you can date anyone you point your finger at, you can possess all of the riches the world has to offer and there’s no need to be humble about it. You are THE it girl, after all, are you not? All we’re stating is facts.

B. You cannot serve two masters.

“If you are dissatisfied with your present expression in life the only way to change it, is to take your attention away form that which seems so real to you and rise in consciousness to that which you desire to be. You cannot serve two masters, therefore to take your attention from one state of consciousness and place it upon another is to die to one and live to the other.” - At Your Command Ch. 2

In other words, you cannot sustain two polarizing states at once and you cannot take any part of the old state into the new state. If you want change, you must be loyal to it. You must be so committed to it that you have no space to even consider the old story because it doesn’t matter in the slightest anymore. Fall in love with your new state of consciousness that you are willing to be devoted to it no matter what. Leave the old in the past so the new can take its place.

C. Feeling the wish fulfilled.

“You must assume that you are what you want to be and continue therein, for the reality of your assumption has its being in complete independence of objective fact and will clothe itself in flesh if you persist in the feeling of the wish fulfilled” - The Power of Awareness Ch. 21

Capturing the feeling of the wish fulfilled is utterly essential, no matter what it is that you desire to manifest because the process will always be the same. First we must assume ourselves to be that which we desire to be through I AM and we persist in it independent of the objectiveness of our world until we are one with our new state.

The moment you successfully attain that feeling and continue to live by it, the direction of your attention will continue to focus on the implications of its fulfillment. That is, when you start to accept yourself as an it girl, the scenes that would suggest its consummation will make their way into your imagination, and if you persist in them they will inevitably become part of your state of consciousness.

VII. Invocation ✧ How to become it.

“When you pray, do not get down on your knees and pray to any unknown God. Instead, go to bed and dare to assume you are now who you want to be. Fall asleep assuming it is true and you will be on the road to success, for this is how things are brought into being.” - Brazen Impudence

A. SATS + lullaby.

I have an extensive post about the state akin to sleep which I highly suggest you read for further clarification as well as how I like to use the SATS. I’ll leave the instructions below:

The first step is to define your objective. Have a clear idea of what it is you would like to be (or be in possession of).

Next, ask yourself, “what does the end of that goal look like?” For example, if you would like to manifest a prestigious job opportunity, you’d be congratulated on it. If you’d like to manifest a change in appearance, you would receive compliments (It doesn’t need to include another person, but you may find it more helpful in order to feel it more real). Whatever the end looks like, it must always be an event that implies its fulfillment, that it is done. This is the wish fulfilled.

Get into a comfortable position. You can lay down or sit upright, it doesn’t matter, do whatever feels most comfortable.

Relax. You can do some breathing exercises, listen to music, have a warm drink, whatever it is that makes you relax. 

Induce a moderate degree of drowsiness where you can still concentrate on the wish fulfilled, but be sure to not feel too drowsy where you find it difficult to focus. When you feel like you could move but you don’t want to (because you’re too comfortable), that’s when you’ll know you’re in the state akin to sleep.

Construct a scene that implies the fulfillment of your desire by making elsewhere here and then now, then feel it real by incorporating your senses into it and imagine yourself being present within your imaginal scene from your perspective. Confine your scene to a single action. If your scene implies that you have received wonderful news, do not wander off in your visualization by doing a thousand irrelevant things afterwards, simply stick to the congratulations and mentally feel yourself being present in your scene. Repeat the scene until it takes on the tones of reality. [A tip from Edward Art: Focus on feeling it real (feeling the wish fulfilled) first and then the sensory aspects of your scene will follow]

If you find it difficult to focus on a scene and feel it real or if you simply cannot conceptualiza what the end would even look like, follow steps 1 through 4 and do the following: condense the fulfillment to three words or less and repeat them over and over again until your mind is dominated by the single sensation of thankfulness. Meditate on this phrase until you accept it as a fact.

¹ Visualization ideas.

Your scenes will vary depending on what life you want to live. You can change your scenes every time you visualize during the SATS so long as they all imply the same end. What would imply that you are an it girl? Being interviewed? Walking down a red carpet? Men dropping their jaws when you pass by? For ideas, consider what activities would comprise a day in your it girl life.

² The lullaby method.

"Remain there until you feel its certainty, until you reach the point of satisfaction, until you are convinced of its truth; and although the world may collapse around you, you will become that which you have assumed you are." - An Inner Conviction

If you would like to try out the lullaby method, some three word phrases you could use are: I’m that girl/person, I have everything, It is done, I’m so happy, I AM (__), etc.

B. Mental diets.

“Feast on the idea, become identified with the idea as though you were already that embodied state. Walk in the assumption that you are what you want to be. If you feast on that and remain faithful to that mental diet, you will crystallize it. You will become it in this world.” - Thinking Fourth Dimensionally

Mental diets aren’t particularly necessary since they can imply that you need to be monitoring your thoughts constantly. However, objectively being conscious of them can help you determine what state you are currently occupying. If you would like to indulge in a mental diet you can do so by asking yourself the following questions:

Is this what I would want someone else to say or think about me?

Would my it girl think this thought?

I would also like to briefly recall that thoughts alone don’t hold power unless you accept them as facts. You can have intrusive thoughts and joke all you want about how you’re ugly but unless you persist in that and feel them to be true it will not manifest.

C. Inner conversations.

"What are you saying at every moment of time? Watch it; be careful what you are saying, because your whole vast world is this inner conversation pushed out." - Control Your Inner Conversations

I urge you to stop internally berating yourself or imagining someone speaking negatively about you. Pay attention to the perpetual inner conversation you hold with yourself: “I’m not good at math”, “my friends always make plans without me”, “I’m so awkward”, because what you say and believe about yourself is what you will continue to face in the third dimension. Instead, think about the lovely remarks you’d like others to say about you and mentally hear them say them. You can also try vaunting which is the practice of constructing a conversation in which you brag from the wish fulfilled. You can turn to the example I used of being described in third person by someone else and speak from first person instead (I AM).

D. Revision.

"At the end of my day, I review the day; I don't judge it, I simply review it. I look over the entire day, all the episodes, all the events, all the conversations, all the meetings, and then as I see it clearly in my mind's eye, I rewrite it. I rewrite it and make it conform to the ideal day I wish I had experienced. I take scene after scene and rewrite it, revise it, and having revised my day, then in my imagination I relive that day, the revised day, and I do it over and over in my imagination until this seeming imagined state begins to take on to me the tones of reality. It seems that it's real, that I actually did experience it and I have found from experience that these revised days, if really lived, will change my tomorrows. When I meet people tomorrow that today disappointed me, they will not tomorrow, for in me I have changed the very nature of that being, and having changed him, he bears witness tomorrow of the change that took place within me." - The Pruning Shears of Revision

Before you go to bed, revisit the occurrences of your day and when you recall an unfavorable one that challenges your it girl state of consciousness and rewrite it. Follow the steps for the SATS and construct a scene that would replace the unfavorable situation and convert it into a favorable situation.

E. Finish the day feeling the wish fulfilled.

"Do not let the sun descend upon any vexation of the day." - The Pruning Shears of Revision

This one is an absolute must. If you can help it, try to refrain from falling asleep in the assumption that you are not an it girl. If you are not feeling the wish fulfilled, take a few minutes to meditate on your state and then fall asleep feeling embraced by it and the relief of knowing that who you desire to be is who you already are (also known as the Sabbath).

VIII. Preservation ✧ How to sustain it.

"Do you always turn to your imagination and, no matter what happens, do you remain faithful to the state imagined? If you do, you have passed the test. But if every little rumor, doubt, or fear can move you around like a pawn on a chessboard, then you are not keeping the faith!" - God’s Creative Power

A. Persistence.

“By desiring to be other than what you are, you can create an ideal of the person you want to be and assume that you are already that person. If this assumption is persisted in until it becomes your dominant feeling, the attainment of your ideal is inevitable.”  - The Power of Awareness Ch. 3

To briefly remind you, persistence means to remain obstinate with an intention regardless of difficulties or obstructions. When you are adopting a new state of consciousness, you may initially struggle to feel it real or even become impatient with its lack of manifestation in the third dimension, but you must keep returning to it no matter what.  You may waver and you may falter but if you remember to proceed with the embodiment of your it girl state by returning to it through any preferred means, no force and no power will cumber its realization.

B. Forget about time.

"The length of time between my desire and its conception depends entirely upon my inner conviction that it is done."- An Inner Conviction

Focusing on the “time” it takes for your state to feel natural to you will only hold you back and keep you in a cycle of waiting. Ask yourself what the end, or the actualization of being an it girl, looks like for you and live in it. Do not suppress yourself to what appears to be the present moment if it is not reflecting the end of your desires.  If you are concerned with “the time it’ll take”, then you are conscious of the opposite of your desires which means you are not feeling the wish fulfilled.

Always seek the wish fulfilled and abide by it until it blossoms into your world.

C. Disregard appearances.

"These appearances will continue in being as long as you give them life through your conscious awareness of them. You must disregard the evidence of your senses as it pertains to any undesirable condition in your life. You must Imagine and feel that you have already attained that which you want to experience rather than that which you do not want to continue in being. This may appear difficult, yet you have probably exercised this principle unconsciously to produce negative results." -  Imagination Creates Reality

Do not settle for less than you seek. You never need to compromise with whatever it is that you desire because as I have mentioned, all exists and all is possible. Reject anything that doesn’t confirm that you are an it girl and never take no for an answer. Be adamant. Decide on what it is that you want and regardless of the limitations of your environment, consent to its immersion to your state of consciousness. No matter what you see or hear, do not accept it if it is not what you want. If you continue to suppress the acceptance of your desires to your senses then that's where your consciousness will remain.

“You don't accept one thing in the world as final unless it conforms to the ideal you want to realize in the world.” - The Pruning Shears of Revision

D. You already are, not will be.

“That which you seek you already are, it can never be so far off as even to be near, for nearness implies separation.” - No One To Change But Self

Something we can learn from it girls is the following: it girls don’t care whether or not they’re it girls, they simply are. So although we are intentionally shifting our state of consciousness, remember to not approach this with a trying mindset or the idea that you will become when you already are, because the use of the word “will” implies that you currently are not. As I’ve said before, “you can’t try to be someone you already are”. Whatever the wish fulfilled looks like for you, accept it at this very moment. Go straight to the end and bathe in it, rejoice in the fulfilled prayer as you go about your day and remain faithful to that inner conviction.

E. Reject the possibility of failure.

“Don’t be anxious or concerned as to results. They will follow just as surely as day follows night.” - Your faith is your fortune Ch. 21

Your desires are literally a guarantee. You can bring absolutely anything into being if you proceed with your intention in spite of what you experience in the flesh. You possess a gift that no one will ever be able to confiscate from you and that is your imagination. Intentional use of this gift will bring forward the beautification of your world in means you would not have been able to devise. Do not become an impediment in your journey by concerning yourself with the means, for they are never your responsibility. If you are serious and willing to assume in your favor, the mountains that need to move will move, the obstacles in the path towards heaven will be cleared and the people who need to play a role relative to its fruition will act accordingly without you having to do so much as lift a finger.

F. Apply.

“You must be doers of the law of assumption, for without application, the most profound understanding will not produce any desired result.” - The Power of Awareness Ch. 18

It is not enough for you to read the entirety of this guide without intending to put the instructions in it to use. You could read and listen to every document, every book and every lecture out there that tells you exactly how to manifest your desires but unless you take that information and put it to use, it was all acquired in vain. This post was long and detailed, do not let it go to waste by refusing to apply and persist. Wanting to do it is not enough, you must DO IT through persistence and a disciplined mind. Do not let the day in which you are reading this post to come to an end without acknowledging that you are an it girl now, not will be, you are. Plant the seed today and you will reap the harvest tomorrow.

"Your assumption, to be effective, cannot be a single isolated act, it must be a maintained attitude of the wish fulfilled." - The Power of Awareness Ch. 22

G. Calm reminders

I’m sure some of these concerns may have risen at some point so I will clear them up right now: acting as if is not necessary, neglecting your current circumstances and pretending they are not occurring is not necessary and being happy all the time is also not necessary. It is okay if you fall out of your new state from time to time, do not think that there is such a thing as “losing progress” because you can never truly lose what is already in your possession. If you are dealing with difficult circumstances I strongly recommend you read this post: how i manifested my dream life with extremely hard circumstances + how you can too.

IX. Motivation ✧ 

“I don’t care what it is; when you know what you want, you can make your desire so real, so natural that you will reach a feeling of certainty which no power in the world can stop. When that feeling is yours, drop it. Don’t ask anyone if what you did was right or wrong; you did it and that’s all that is necessary.” - An Inner conviction

If you are truly serious about becoming the it girl of your reality, you’ll have to be disciplined, determined, and persistent. You have to be willing to give up who you are right now in order to become who you want to be because the longer you entertain your old self, the longer you’ll postpone your dream self. You can decide at any moment to change, and if you are not actively working towards shifting your state of consciousness then you are consenting to its preservation. You accept what you tolerate, whether it’s mediocre friends, mediocre grades or a mediocre lifestyle and the only way to put an end to that is by intending to because it all starts with you. Do you want it enough? Are you willing to finally become an it girl or will you continue daydreaming about being an it girl? If you’re capable of being someone you don’t want to be, what makes you think you aren’t mutually capable of becoming someone you do want to be? Your it girl self is not far away from you, she already exists within your imagination and she is waiting for you to bring life to her. You already know everything you need to know in order to do it, so what’s stopping you? I know it can feel challenging because we feel confined to our current circumstances but I have so much faith in you and I know you have it in you to give yourself the world. You deserve to wake up every day feeling completely obsessed with yourself and your life. You don’t need to spend a minute longer hoping things that feel like they’re out of your control change if you know you are the one who’s in control. This is your reality, after all. Decide who you want to be and what life you want to lead, start showing up every day for it and remember to never accept anything that doesn’t live up to your standards. Dare to pursue everything you have ever wanted, all you need is faith the size of a mustard seed. 

X. Outroduction ✧

"Every dream could be realized by those self-disciplined enough to believe it."-  No One To Change But Self

And that concludes this guide! If there’s one takeaway you should carry with you from it it’s the following: you reserve the right to have high standards in regards to every aspect of your life, you deserve the partner of your dreams, the home of your dreams, the life of your dreams, you deserve all of it and more. Becoming an it girl doesn’t require a meticulous plan of action. All it takes is the use of imagination and discipline. You can realize your every dream. Whatever you want regardless of what it is or how unrealistic it sounds, you should demand more out of life and you should never settle for less than you desire, fantasize about or dream of, you can have it and you should have it. The world was made by you and for you so be self-willed and go for it. I have given you everything you need to know to become an it girl and all you have to do is apply. You’ve got this! Remember that you cannot fail, so when you succeed (notice how I didn't say if), I want to hear your success story. Until next time, mis amores!

Love always, your bestie Hera * .♡ *:･ﾟ✧ ⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

“You can be the man (or woman) you want to be, but not by simply wishing. You must make the effort to look at the world mentally and see it reflect your fulfilled desire. And when it does you must remain in that state until you reach the inner conviction that what you are seeing, touching, tasting, smelling, and hearing is true, clothe yourself in the feeling of its reality - and explode! Do that and you are pregnant. And what do you do after pregnancy? Nothing! You simply wait for its birth to appear in its own appointed hour. And it will! When you least expect it your desire will objectify itself in the world for you to enjoy, whether it be health, wealth, or fame. That’s how God’s law works.” - An Inner Conviction

[riality-check]

#42 with any ship you want for the “100 ways to say I love you” prompts?

VERY late but here we go!

42. "Is this okay?"

The weirdest thing about Steve Harrington is that he's weird.

Since the spring break from hell, Eddie has learned that he's been a bit of a dick. For all his railing against stereotyping and conformity, he subscribed to a lot of it under the logic of shielding his little sheep. He's had his assumptions proven wrong again and again since by people like Better Wheeler and Better Sinclair and Steve, and he thinks he's probably a better person for it.

His personal growth isn't the point, however monumental.

He's grown past the point of thinking Steve was just another brainless, clone-like jock, but he's still learning new things about him.

Like, Steve is really loud sometimes. He talks to himself like he forgets that other people can hear him, and one time he started singing "Hammer to Fall" before he realized that the D&D session in the next room over quieted down specifically to hear him. It's more common when they're at his house than anywhere else, but it still happens.

And Steve is a really good cook, but he makes the strangest things. He can make delicious meals out of the most random ingredient combinations - Sinclair and Henderson have, indeed, put this particular skill to the test time and time again - but when Eddie asked if he could make chocolate chip cookies, he looked at him like he had three heads.

But the weirdest thing about Steve, by far, is his thing with touch.

He oscillates wildly between being the clingiest motherfucker on the planet and actively avoiding all human contact. Sometimes, Eddie can see the switch happen in real time, can see how he seeks out contact from Buckley one moment and freezes at a hug from Henderson in the next.

It's weird. Steve Harrington is weird.

But, while Eddie is a touchy guy, he's not a dick. So, he's come up with a new catchphrase, at this point, around Steve.

"Is this okay?" Eddie asks, putting an arm around his shoulders.

"Is this okay?" he asks, grabbing for Steve's hand.

"Is this okay?" he asks, kicking his feet up into his lap.

Steve says "yes" most of the time, and when he says "no," Eddie calmly moves away.

It's that simple, because Eddie isn't a dick.

He's not the only one who does this. Buckley, Better Wheeler, Better Sinclair, and Henderson all do the same thing. They all check first, albeit in different ways.

But Eddie starts to notice a pattern. Soon, he becomes the person Steve asks the most often.

He lightly shuts it down the first time it happens. Tells Steve he doesn't need to ask. Eddie has always been touchy, practically hanging off of all the friends who are okay with him using them like personal jungle gyms.

Steve shrugs, plays it off the way he plays off everything because he's still cool, just not an asshole. But Eddie can see the relief in his face.

There's nothing special about this time. Steve curls into his side without asking, without preamble, as has become more common, while they engage in the weekly pastime of watching a tape Steve "borrowed" from work.

Robin is usually there with them, but she and Nancy finally figured their shit out. They're off doing god knows what.

Probably each other, Steve suggested dryly when Eddie brought it up, causing him to spray Coke out of his nose right when the movie started.

But now? Westley isn't dead, and as he's threatening Humperdinck, Steve whispers, "Is this okay?"

Eddie turns to the side just in time for their lips to meet softly.

And that's when he realizes that months and months of "is this okay" and gentle touches have been his own personal "as you wish."

He's been in love with Steve Harrington for months.

And he thinks that this kiss, and the next, and the next, and the next, are more perfect than anything Westley and Buttercup could ever dream of.

Prompts here.

#ria writes #asked and answered #rejectofsociety #thanks for asking!! #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie ficlet #st #st ficlet #stranger things #stranger things ficlet #fluff

[onecupofspiders-please]

Astarion having to work his way up to causal physical affection

Pronouns: none! I used second person! (I’m still gonna tag x male reader tho because highkey unless specifically stated I don’t write with fem readers in mind)

TW: nothing explicit, but Cazador is mentioned and there’s a very brief mentions of creeps. There’s also one (1) brainworm joke. Talk about being touch repulsed at the end

Type: HC’s!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

-Ok so I’ve seen a lot of people argue both sides of this

-“Oh he definitely jumps on it” or “it’s a very long and very slow process”

-You’re both right, actually.

-At first, he won’t even be the one to do it himself

-I feel like he would be afraid

-Afraid that if he tries you’ll take it as something other then innocent

-Which logically he KNOWS you won’t. All he has to do is ask or explain himself

-But that’s not how anxiety works. Logic is long gone, a distant memory, a blip on the horizon-

-So he waits for you to initiate just like with the hug

-All while silently wishing you would

-If you’re not the causally affectionate type I feel like he would try to drop hints without actually saying it

-Maybe while you guys are walking he puts one hand in his pocket and leaves the other out, open, not fiddling with anything

-Just kind of letting his hand hang there and hope it’s obvious that it’s “perfect for holding” (his thoughts)

-Maybe he’ll causally comment on how busy the market is and how he hopes you guys don’t loose each other

-His eyes snapping over to you to see if you picked up on what he was trying to get at

-If you do then he’s overjoyed! Very proud of himself for his little stunt (even if it was needlessly complicated and he could have just asked)

-If you don’t he tries to seem unaffected. Acts like he doesn’t care but gets vaguely pouty

-He’s not mad AT you of course. He’s self aware enough to realize that it’s not your fault he can’t make himself ask, but it still hurts

-Pulling you back from danger (or even just so you don’t bump into someone/something) and pulling you against his chest in a very bad attempt at a sort of hug

-“You really need to watch your step, darling. Less you make an utter fool of yourself.”-He says while STILL holding onto you

-If you go down this route it’s gonna be a long ride. Sorry, love

-On the flip side, if you ARE causally affectionate then it makes things run a lot smoother

-Now I’m going off the assumption that you at least try to ask before doing things ok?

-Like maybe NOT when you casually grab his hand to drag him through a crowd, but before you hug him and shit

-Consent is important after all

-He gets VERY happy with all these little displays of affection

-He might act smug about it tho. Call you clingy or needy. Bro still has a rep to uphold ight?

-Either way though, all of this works up to HIM starting to test the waters on being the one giving the affection

-If it’s because you’re not getting it, and he can’t voice his needs properly, then he’ll have a “fine. I’ll do it myself” moment

-Anxiety can only have a hold on him for so long before the touch starvation wins

-If you DO get it, then it’s because all these little acts of affection are encouraging HIM to try as well

-Either way we get to this point don’t worry

-At FIRST? This seems like it’s gonna be slow too

-He has to steel his nerves and take a breath before quickly moving to grab ur hand in his own

-(Can you tell I’ve been thinking about hand holding?)

-And if you jump or startle-which is fair I would too. Mans hands are ICE-he’ll immediately drop it and try to play it off

-If you try and comfort him, or just grab his hand again, he’ll count it as a win

-If you let him play it off he will. But he’ll be cringing to himself when everyone else is asleep/trancing

-“Hey remember that embarrassing things you just did?”-Astarion’s brain(worm)

-Yeah it was a rocky start

-But yk, he’s never been one to back down for long

-Kind of had that mindset ingrained into him unfortunately

-(cazador when I catch you! When I CATCH YOU CAZADOR-)

-So he tired again. This time with better results!

-And he goes from there. Experimenting with little touches and shit

-Holding hands, holding onto your arm, moving your hand to hold onto HIS arm, leaning his head against you.

-Now this is where the “he definitely jumps on it” part comes in

-Once he finds his footing he RUNS with this shit, man

-It’s like all his anxiety was thrown out the window and now sits outside next to his logic

-Bro is linking his elbow with yours if you’re walking anywhere with a crowd just saying

-Idk why but I KNOW he’s into that specifically. I can feel it in my BONES

-Always seems to have a hand on your back or your legs are always touching

-Mans insists on sitting RIGHT next to you btw

-He is also a big fan of cuddling. Watch out tho you might catch hypothermia from being so close to him (/j)

-Now of course, there’s still some issues

-If you ask him to back off he will. He understands what it’s like to be overwhelmed by touch (and not in a sexy way)

-But ouchie that hurt a lil bit

-Like, again, he’s NOT mad. Maybe just silently disappointed

-And then he would feel VERY guilty for feeling like that

-You respect HIS boundaries! Why is it hard for him to do the same!?

-Please talk to him about it. Reassurance is needed. He’s terrified of being the very same creeps he had to endure

-And even if you don’t ask him to back off there’s still the reality that he just

-He has bad days, and he has worse days

-healing isn't linear

-There will be days where touch makes his skin crawl

-There will be times when he wakes up fine with it, maybe even craving it, but when you give it he suddenly feels the urge to vomit

-And for as much progress as he’s made old habits die hard

-He’s still working on voicing his needs and the reality is it’s likely he won’t tell you when he’s feeling like this

-At least not at first

-He might try to endure it for your sake. Maybe even because HE was the one who wanted it and he feels like he can’t back out now

-You would understand if he did. You’ve told him that. But again, anxiety beats logic

-Maybe you pick up on it. Maybe you don’t

-If you do then talk to him. Drop the touching and remind him it’s ok to change his mind

-If you don’t then he might snap on you

-Not on purpose, really. But it was building up so fast

-Normally he’s so GOOD at hiding these feelings, but because it’s YOU it’s suddenly so much harder

-If he does though? Please be patient with him

-He might storm off, he might ask YOU to leave, or he might sit there

-No matter what happens though he’ll apologize when he’s thinking clearly again

-If you got angry back at him you apologize too (or at least I’d hope you would)

-You talk about it. He admits he was feeling icky and that it really wasn’t your fault

-And while yes he was technically the one to lack the communication skills, it’s not really his fault either. Bro is only JUST now realizing he can say no without getting physical consequences

-You both mutually agree to blame it on Cazador and laugh

-^Said as a joke to break the tension but also actually literally fuck that guy hope he rots

-But in the end you guys talk and move on

-He works on talking about his feelings more, and in the mean time you’re there to listen and offer a hug when needed (or when wanted)

-He’s trying

-And he couldn’t be more grateful you’re there with him through it

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hello ok so I wrote this at 5-6 am please lemmie know if I make spelling mistakes. I am dyslexic and very tired

Also: @the-stage-manager (lemmie know if you don’t want me to keep tagging you btw :] )

#astarion x tav #gender neutral tav #nb tav #astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x gn reader #bg3 x reader #bg3 x tav #astarion x male tav #astarion x male reader

[cerastes]

What's your read on Andreanna's 'love at first sight' line? It could be fun to just take it as face value and just assume it's just her having a crush on Skadi and Spectre (making her utter lack of connection to them on the network very funny), but I feel like there's something else going on there. Is it seaborn stuff? Something to do with her being an abyssal hunter knockoff having some kind of innate admiration for the original?

It’s because she’s a Walmart Abyssal Hunter, yeah.

The line in question:

Andreana feels something completely and utterly puzzling and maybe even thrilling when see sees Specter and Skadi, so she says this. It’s further elaborated on in her Module lore:

In her Module, Andreana explains that she was making a joke with that comment, however, it is true that she felt weird and bothered, Felt A Ways, as some would say, when looking at them or in their immediate presence. Then she posits that this physiological reaction might have to do with That Weird Backstory Of Hers, but also, 1) she doesn’t really care too much about it, and 2) it sounds like a pain in the ass so she doesn’t want to find out.

As we all know (and if not, as you’ll learn now), Abyssal Hunters can sense each other on a level that other people can’t. They perceive each other as they would a wave, a sea current, the smell of the sea, even its temperature, if close enough to each other. In Under Tides, for example, Skadi immediately perks up when Gladiia breaks into Specter’s room to steal her away, because she immediately ‘smelled’ a cold, strong wave of seawater coming from her room. That’s how Gladiia ‘smells’ or ‘feels’. It is stated at various points that Hunters don’t even need words to communicate if they so choose, with Specter in particular feeling like land-dweller language is bothersome to a fault at first, and Skadi addressing that with “no yeah I hated it at first too, still can’t get used to it, but it’s got its virtues”. It also explains a little why Skadi is so stoic and laconic: She literally isn’t used to talking or needing to, but I digress.

It’s easy to extrapolate that this is precisely what Andreana is feeling when she sees the Hunters: She’s “feeling” them but has no earthly clue as to what the hell that is in the first place. Proper Aegir Hunters have an education — Gladiia taught Laurentina not just about the Hunter trade, but also about art in general, with a focus on dancing — that prepares them to be Hunters and have the information needed given to them. Andreana has memory issues and not a damn clue of what the dicken is going on when she “feels” a Hunter, no context, so her first assumption is “Huh. Love at first sight?” because why the hell is she feeling something as intimate as what kind of waves and breeze they are from just looking at them? Then, a while later, since Andreana is a pretty pragmatic, logical, no-nonsense person, she starts putting the legos together and thinking, oh, yeah, might have to do with my Mysterious Circumstances, on second thought. Then she shrugs it off and keeps fiddling with her crossbow.

In Kal’tsit’s own words Andreana 200 Trust Files), if Laurentina or Didi can be considered a proper inkwell, Andreana is a droplet of ink in a glass of water: A facsimile, an attempt at something, an aberration. Of course, this callous indictment isn’t directed at Andreana, it’s aimed at what was done to Andreana.

And since I know I’ll get an ask about it, I’ll take the liberty of plugging Andreana into Drimo’s patented Just A Guy spectrum. Is Andreana Just A Guy (gender neutral)? Not quite. Let’s compare and contrast with our favorite specimen, Shalem. Shalem is terrified of his backstory and runs from it at every turn, until it was impossible for him to refuse it any longer (IS2), Andreana, on the other hand, is aware that she has a backstory. She KNOWS there’s lore, but she doesn’t really want to meet it. The backstory ambushes her, but Andreana says “no thank you :)” and walks past it. It’s a pain in the ass. She’d rather play paintball. She’s not normal, is keenly aware of it, and doesn’t give a zalak’s ass about it. Can’t be bothered! Simply uninterested!

#arknights #andreana

[inkskinned]

i both firmly believe that self-diagnosing saved my life and i think that the way tiktok and instagram have recently been spreading misinformation about mental illness/neurodivergence is incredibly harmful.

people who are looking for answers are already people who are in a vulnerable situation.

much of the misinformation appears logically sound; and is presented as definitive fact (prefaced with claims such as "research shows"). it's imperative we remember correlation does not prove causation. it is incredibly dangerous to make definitive statements like "if X happened in your childhood, you now Z as an adult." real scientists will almost always use may or other less-definitive terms. similarly, equating one behavior/experience with any single condition is also unsafe. many conditions have overlapping symptoms; and many people "mask" their key symptoms, even to themselves.

we cannot discern from a singular data point any conclusion. in official diagnosis, for a behavior/experience to be considered a symptom, it must significantly influence your life. many people enjoy an organized space. that is a preference. disrupting your daily life even at personal cost in order to prioritize organization is more likely a symptom.

again, a single data point is not an effective diagnostic tool. it is necessary and important work to catalogue and consider all unwanted/distressing behaviors in order to understand a complete picture of the person.

i will see creators in paid partnerships make generalized behavioral/emotional claims that apply to a large portion of a community, and then they will suggest that the "solution" to that behavior is through their paid partner/through their personal support. "follow for more psych tips/facts" is an incredibly evil marketing tactic. i very rarely see unpartnered/unbranded content on how to aid/comfort those behaviors and feelings.

much of the misinformation employs a subtle technique (called confirmation bias) of setting up a conclusion before "proving" the conclusion. "you know you have X when you experience A,B, and C." no person's experience of their conditions/behaviors will look exactly the same as another's. while knowing certain things might be a sign/symptom of a condition, it is irresponsible to consider it definitive.

confirmation bias is unfortunately extremely effective on tiktok specifically. the algorithm will notice that you interacted longer with the video that "proves" (through a singular video) that you "have" a condition. it will continue to feed you related videos that further confirm what you believe.

this is dangerous because we are, unfortunately, not good at knowing ourselves. i did not know it was unusual to vividly nightmare every night; i didn't consider it a symptom. i was similarly dismissive also of any other signs of my PTSD - i incorrectly assigned them to anxiety/adhd. on the small scale, this can mean a longer journey to healing. on the larger scale, it can mean people with extremely difficult situations are unable to get the help they need.

please, if you can, and you're looking to self-diagnose: be careful about what you assume about yourself. try to keep an honest journal of what you're thinking/feeling/doing for a few days.

do not go in with an assumption. try to keep an open mind. i think we all "suspect" we have something - but like i said, i completely missed my own PTSD symptoms, because i suspected the ADHD the most, and only "saw" those symptoms.

do your own research. if the tiktok says "research shows", google that research. figure out who paid for that research. do further research related to that study - has it ever been repeated? is it peer reviewed? do other researchers seem to accept it as conclusive?

if you feel you really resonate with the materials of one person's experience with a condition, find other examples. see if you relate to other creators who identify similarly.

and please - please do not stop once you come to a conclusion. i fully believe that the diagnostic process should be seen as a first step, not a destination. by knowing what you might be struggling with, you gain an incredibly powerful tool on how to gain peace with that condition.

if you feel yourself emotionally respond to a tiktok/etc that suggests something that might be true about yourself, i'm glad you had that experience. but it's also important to not relax into the "easy" answer. interrogate it. start googling what else that could mean; what ways you could work on healing that wound.

healing does not "belong" to any one condition. i want you to begin to look into healing no matter if you have "proven" you have a condition or not. it is never selfish to practice responsible self-care. even if you don't relate to having adhd, you are not harming me by using adhd-inspired study tips. it is not making my condition worse for you to seek peace by asking for more time on tests. even if it was - the fault would be with the system, not in your need of something the system makes inaccessible.

remind yourself that everything you experience is real. and because it is real, it is complicated. while things might be related - even sometimes clearly related - a stranger on the internet cannot make that discernment for you. you as a person deserve the work, attention, and care that goes into the process of unravelling the harm that has been done to you.

it makes me very, very upset to see how popular these videos have become, because they're so irresponsible. and they clearly are targeting a vulnerable group. for example, making generalized claims about children of unloving caretakers is targeting those who have experienced neglect. there is no way to use 30 second videos to correctly analyze what that neglect might have caused in your adult life. i'm sorry, but it's snake oil.

i know it is so powerful soothing to recognize that you aren't broken. that others exist like you out there. i want every person looking for answers to find their answer. i want you to feel seen and heard and understood. i want you to find your community.

i just want it to happen safely.

#every time i write this im like #i just want to say a short thing about this #and every time it ends up being 12 pages long #but since it keeps happening #and i keep seeing shit like this... #this isn't even everything i feel about this #i hope this is clear like #what im saying is #NOT ''you don't have it if u selfdiagnose'' #it's instead.... #you might!!! just don't let 1 or 2 videos confirm it!! #also!!! don't assume that symptom A belongs to condition X!! #even as someone who did eventually get diagnosed like #i still find myself being like - oh that's my adhd #only to figure out 12 hours later. nope that was a panic attack #also none of those videos are about how to HELP the behavior #also this doesn't talk about getting a therapist eventually but please get professional help if you can #it took me fucking forever tho #what im saying is that in the meantime #u can heal now #this is too long im posting it on a sunday so nobody reads it

[miracledarling]

why every method works

[ small rant + my experience in loa community ]

💙notes: this was supposed to be a very old post i started writing weeks ago but it never got published so i added more stuff into it later

disclaimer: when i talk about my own experience and perspective, i am not forcing any of my opinions onto you. find what works for you, literally the point of this post is to provide that reassurance

📖table of contents . . .

① it does work, duh ② rant about overconsumption ③ my personal experience ④ what i've learned ⑤ the bottom line

i have explained basically similar things in other places that i am covering on this post so don't be too surprised

1 2 3 4 5

but i've already had this in my drafts for too long so i had to put this out there at some point . . .

it DOES work, duh

as a beginner in loa, i would be drowned by my logical mind. even before i got into loa, i was listening to subliminals. and i would constantly be asking myself: "is this gonna work?" "am i doing this right?" if i paused a subliminal halfway through, i would get so anxious. asking myself "do i have to rewind the subliminal all over again?" then, after reading solar subs guide, i was introduced to loa and the concept of manifesting. but ofc i had trouble believing in subliminals in the very beginning and at that point i was just feeling that i was wasting my time. on all this "spirituality" but months later, after seeing small successes one after another, i realized the law may hold some truth after all. ofc i was still skeptical, and always questioning myself, but i've gotten quite a lot of manifestations it was a bit good to be true right?

as for the loa community, theres been debate in this community time and time again, trends come and go. if youve been on loatwt u know how toxic that affirm vs states debate got, and it's still coming back every week. sometimes people will push one method and put down another, or feel discouraged when the method that is trending isn't the one that resonates with them.

i've seen some limiting beliefs being spread around here and there but what i've learned is that there are NO rules when it comes to manifesting. when it comes to the law of assumption, the law of assumption is LITERALLY the law of ASSUMPTION. like literally. it's like not only is the world made of atoms, it's literally made of assumptions. everything is an assumption. EVERYTHING.

and one important thing i realized is there are absolutely NO RULES. NOTHING IS TRUE UNLESS YOU ASSUME IT IS.

only what you persistently assume will be true, will be facts.

i mean, sure i heard a lot of ppl say things like "_____ doesnt work "

sigh. that's just a personal belief? bc rlly, anything can work depending on ur assumption. from now on, whatever ur doing, it WORKS and it's WORKING (and can you stop telling urself that it didn't work or u fail, u CANNOT fail). no literally please stop searching for reasons you've failed. you're just persisting in the assumption that you've failed. the more you search for it, the more your outer reality is going to show you evidence that you're failing. right at your face.

what you could do is you can create the assumption that everything always works out for you. and no, u do not need to rewatch the youtube vid, reread that success story, reread the post, nope. it works, it's working. ur doing it right. believe it or not it works !! ofc it works. it does work, duh. u can't fail. the law is always working. and it's working in your favor.

a rant about overconsumption

now some people may overthink everything. and i get it. i recommend just staying away from all the loa info you can find.

yes i know i've been reposting many posts but the reason i'm going to take a little break from doing that is for my own good and for everyone else's. because i feel that retrieving all these old posts will make you more prone to overconsumption(and take up some of my own time and energy) and it's not my job lol.

like most of us are constantly saying the same answer to all your asks and in our posts, only adding out own views and experiences. seriously, you don't need to read any more posts at this point. it's the same thing with personal opinions added to it. to be honest, it you're someone who is new or overthinks a lot, scrolling through tumblr may do more harm than good. you're just getting fed a ton of different opinions of different bloggers regarding the same topic-loa, and seeing disagreements cause confusion. i know that the states vs a&p discourse confused the shit out of me. i was overconsuming and overthinking without applying. big mistake. i'm happy i learned to create my own rules now.

there's something i realized: is there even a point for consuming loa content?

i mean it's the law of assumption. like literally assumptions that you persist in manifest. so why do you need to know more than that? as i said earlier, why do you need to look for a reason that you've failed. stop excusing that. you didn't fail. you didn't fail at all. you just chose to go back to the old story and you decided to accept that instead of accepting the new one. you declined the new story.

imagine if you attend a party where you needed to pick ONE dress to wear. you're currently wearing a pink one but you want to wear the blue one. well then wear the blue one. put the pink one away and put on the blue one. so simple right?

now back to what i was talking about. there is literally no need for you to look for more loa information at this point. there is zero reason to do that. because you know what the law is. just by the title it's the law of assumption, so literally just assume and persist in that assumption. that's it.

99.9% of blog posts are just repeating the same thing to you. but with their opinions added. i don't know how many times i'm going to have to say this but it's the truth.

keep this in mind: an assumption persisted in hardens into fact. now you see most posts always somewhere says something along the lines of:

"dwell/think from your desired state" "dwell in 4d/imagination" "think as if you have it already" "persist/stick to the new story" "don't waver/go back and forth, just stick to the new story" "affirm and persist until your mind is saturated with the new story" "repetition reprograms your mind, creating new assumption" "change your mindset to fit the new assumption" "just know and persist in the knowing" "be consistent and consistently thinking from the new story" "maintain a mental diet to stick to new story" "just decide and stick to it"

in the end, they all imply and result the same thing.

new state = new mindset = new story = 4d = assumption that you have it already

so persisting in any of these means you're persisting in the new assumption.

in the end, all of the methods you ever used for loa are just to get you to persist in the new assumption. and persisting in that causes it to harden into fact.

now, why do people ask questions, consume new information, use methods, etc?

well actually i think it's okay to do so, and makes sense especially if you're someone who is new to the law. the thing is, the law is just extremely simple. to the point where people just start to complicate it. people literally have to ask "how to persist" "how to accept" "how to fullfill" "how to intend" and that shows it's being complicated way too much. when law assumption is just assumptions become reality.

but it now that i look back, it actually makes sense why people would overthink something so simple, or create new methods, word things differently, and such.

if i were a beginner and i wanted to know how to manifest and someone tells me "oh, easy. just assume, just decide you have it" it probably wouldn't be too helpful. because now i would wonder how to decide. or more, i would wonder "so...is that it? that's all" i mean who would even think it's true at first sight. and especially as a beginner i would probably check the 3d right after and be unhappy because i "decided" but nothing changed. and doubt the law.

which is where methods come to play. if just assuming/accepting is too far to grasp, methods and challenges help people apply the law. since it's broken down step by step. like SATs for example, getting into a drowsy state, repeating a scene until feeling the wish fullfilled. that is easy to understand and follow.

but of course methods are never required. and for those in disbelief of the law, i always tell you to test the law for yourself, apply, and stop overconsuming/overthinking. because overconsuming really does more harm than good in my opinion. because all these loa content are talking about the same thing in general, but just with our personal experience and opinions added to it, it can really make people confused. remember the whole states vs affirming debate. so if someone has all these opinions being thrown at them, of course they will have no idea who to listen to or what to follow.

this is why it's so important to find what works for you. literally start applying as much as you can. it's like an experiment. find your own way of manifesting that you personally enjoy/like. if you are ever going to consume info, only take what resonates and leave what doesn't. manifesting is not one size fits all. if someone has limiting beliefs, stop taking it in like a sponge. girl you are a human not a sponge.

now that you know that everything surrounding loa basically implies the same thing, i hope you release some of that stress and anxiousness when consuming loa content. or simply consume less content.

my personal experience

since i've been such a skeptic in the past, i would constantly be switching methods, hopping from this to that. when i watch one youtube and then watch another with different opinions, i would feel like this is such bs.

so let me give an example. i've seen people say that robotic affirming "doesnt work" when i've manifested most, if not almost all of my desires purely through robotically looping affirmations in my head. because I ASSUME it works, duh. if u assume it doesn't work, it won't. easy as that. like you can assume it takes 1 repetition, 10 repetitions, 10k repetitions. it depends on ur ASSUMPTIONS. its the law of assumption. i've also seen people say that you need to go through a "transition period" which is a huge myth. i've never experienced one in my life.

see? literally it boils down to ur assumptions. even for me, i had to find my own way out of here, rather than consuming other people's info.

what i've learned

okay i was hesitant to write this part because people might take it the wrong way, and defeats the whole purpose of this post. this isn't directed towards anyone lol. rather, see this as a reminder that you do what you want, not what anyone else says. gotta recognize yourself as the creator.

there's literally no wrong way. what works for me may not work for you, and vice versa. but this is only what I learned so feel free to skip this part if you're not interested in hearing my experiences

now, this is what i discovered about myself, just to show that everyone has their own way of manifesting and no wrong or right

i'll admit i am more of an affirming girly and i probably always will be. i'm going to be an affirm + persist girly for life but it's not like it will be the only way to manifest. i respect whatever you do and i love the fact manifesting is different for everyone. in no way will i purposefully force my own opinions onto anyone because whether you like states or affirming or whatever it's completely fine.

and literally i still apply states as well. although i don't really ever considered myself a "state girly," i've known about states for a long time before it became popularized. i remember learning about states and to me, it was the whole package. it did help me in the sense that i could just identify with what i wanted easily. so i will always apply it when i manifest alongside affirming. in other words, i actually apply both.

but on contrary to what works for others, affirming was an easy and straightforward way to get what i want. rewiring the brain through and such made more sense to me especially as a logical person who was skeptical since day one. and whats more is that the reason i found out about loa is through subliminals and i learned more about loa through youtubers, such as sammy ingram. so i was used to affirming the whole time. and it worked for me. however, you do not have to "follow" this if it does not resonate with you

although i understand states better now, and i do believe they are what manifests i still always use affirming and persisting as my main way to manifest since it's always worked for me.

however, if anyone ever ask me how to manifest something, i would always try to tell you to do what works for you. and always do what you resonates with and don't let others opinions guide you. you don't have to repeatedly affirm if you don't want. if you have better way, thats alright, apply it. most important is applying and persist in it rather than overconsumption.

the reason i always share so many posts with you is to help you gain some insight. like i've reblogged tons of posts on my sideblog and even organized them. i've found some old ones that have helped me. but please don't aggressively read and reread all of them. like honey that's overconsumption. no need to do that. skim through one of them and then delete the app. and start applying. and you will be surprised how fast it manifested.

so the void, states, self concept, whatever the trend was...all those things didn't resonate with me as much. heck i didn't even know what was the void until early january which meant 8 months after i already started to manifest for myself

but this just shows that no matter what the hype is, you should stick to what works for you. stop letting others dictate you. just test the law and trust yourself. do it your way.

the bottom line

i don't care how you like to manifest. i seriously don't and in fact, after you read this post, i'd like you get off your phone and test the law to find whats works for you. it doesn't matter works for me. it doesn't matter what other blogger say, it doesn't matter. all that matters is what works for you.

MANIFESTING IS NOT ONE SIZE FITS ALL(i remember sammy ingram even said this in one of her videos lmao) like i don't care if u do affirming, states, or void. it doesnt matter at all. never mattered and never will. just do what u like, darling.

people succeeded with states. people succeeded with affirming. you know what they all had in common? they applied the law.

i have my rules and my beliefs. other bloggers have their rules and their beliefs. many of us have our own limiting beliefs. its all depending on out assumptions. nobody makes ur rules. only you.

yes, even neville, who has very valuable teachings, still does has his own beliefs. like i don't resonate with his ideas of "appointed hour" or "bridge of incidents" but some people do.

and remember when people used to push the "time lag" or the "transition period " well guess what, those are ASSUMPTIONS. its all assumptions.

stop letting people tell you what works and what doesnt. you decide.

in the end, it doesn't matter if u do states, affirming, whatever. it depends on ur assumptions.

stop limiting urself, and do what works for u 💓

#queued posts⏰ #loa #loassumption #manifesting #manifesation #self concept #neville goddard #affirmations #void state #loa affirmations #affirm and persist #10k affirmations #affirmyourreality #affirmyourself #affirmdaily #states of consciousness #manifesting tips #law of assumption #law of attraction #void #sammy ingram #loablr #loa blog

[plusvanity]

Yesterday, I wanted to say that people who blocked me did the wiser thing, but today, I want to touch on a recent issue, a hugely (intentionally) misinterpreted and degrading problem.

The controversies that people started to spread about me literally make me sick to the stomach.

They don't give a fuck about my countless explanations of how this ship is my comfort ship, designed to help me heal from severe abuse, self hatred, body dysmorphia, depression and anxiety.

I try to switch from unhealthy coping mechanisms to something that is both productive, helpful and most of all, harmless (because it's imaginary).

They felt the need to turn something that I created as my own personal fictive escape into a gross sadomasochistic, abusive and extremely toxic 'excuse' for 'why is this ship and not that?'. My guts twist for seeing such cruel assumptions when I have one thing that makes me happy (a story, a healthy narrative) viciously turned into a gruesome scenario that is not what it is at all.

The fact that they accuse me of shipping fair-skinned, blonde people is also the biggest hypocrisy that they could come up with when they themselves forget that Øystein's natural hair is blond and his eyes are blue in their own double-standard ship.

The fact that accuse me of romanticizing self-harm while they themselves 'like' (I have proofs) and approve art of EuroDead self-destructive romanticism shows their duplicitous and impostor nature. This is not to be taken as an insult, but an obvious fact concluded by their behavior.

My ship has little to do with physical looks and everything else to do with the in-depth psychology. It's not me, PlusVanity who says that there's a gigantic overlap between highly-autistic traits and trauma response (in personality disorders), it's Freud, Jung, Lacan's teachings and many other's scholars, neurologists and psychiatrists came to this conclusion many many years before you and I were even born. If you, dearly-opinionated friend, think that you can prove to these honorable psychoanalytical figures (and me, of course) otherwise with credible and well-documented research and not your 'I don't like that just because' synthetic opinion, I will gladly listen to what you have to bring up. I am well-versed in the philosophical and psychological domain, and I can provide solid arguments to everything I claim.

It's more than just unfair to point the finger at me, accusing me of a ludicrous sadomasochistic and 'subliminal racial element' in my art just to satisfy your late frustration with an ' good-enough explanation' for something that you never even bothered to look into because otherwise you would know that you are wrong. I'm not spiteful, I'm just pointing your flaws in logic as straightforwardly and inconsiderable as you seem to point mine, but it's not like you will actually try to understand what I'm saying because this must imply 'admitting defeat' and a kick in the ego, so you don't even bother with my transparent explanations. That's alright.

This message is for the people who are open and mature enough to read the motive behind my art and writing. This monologue is not for the ones who blindly accuse me of horrible things or a hidden agenda that I don't have or try to promote.

If you think that you know better than me, you simply don't. Why might that be? Because I am the author, because you don't think with my brain and you have no access to what I stand for, other than my words and actions and neither my words or actions stood for any type of abuse or political extremism.

You also put words into my mouth by calling me a fan of Varg, when I'm most certainly not, but I mean you hate me, of course you will say such things. Everyone who's following me knows that I not only hate Varg, but mock him daily for his spiteful persona.

I do not engage in any drama, I am not here to fight anyone.

I will only have civilized conversations (if openness exists). I am here to be and share with my friends the one thing that makes me happy. To subjugate me for simply having a different view than yours is tyranny and black and white extremism.

Pairing real people is morally bad, but this includes all real people. Not just Varg and Pelle, but Øystein and Pelle too. Doesn't sound fair now, does it? I understand why.

Anyone is free to believe anything, but a conspiratorial opinion will never compare to the ultimate truth that only the author can provide.

Please block me if you wish for. This is a far more mature approach than lurking here or sending hate. I hope this is constructive.

To sum it up, I'm beyond hate and ingoing frustration. I will gladly wish my late-proclaimed haters a wonderful day even if they roll their eyes. 🖤

You cannot change options, you can only provide your insight.

Be kind, be open, be alright 🖤

I wish this post can be shared so a lot of people can read this 🙏

#my ramblings #pelle ohlin #varg vikernes #burzum #per yngve ohlin #true norwegian black metal #dead mayhem #mayhem

[lovemyromance]

Antis: “Azriel only feels lust for Elain”

…

Ok. Yeah. Sure. Exactly.

Azriel only feels lust for Elain.

…

Azriel has been a side character thus far in this series, seen and understood only through outsider eyes (Feyre, Nesta, Cassian, Rhys).

According to all his friends/family, he’s absurdly in love with Mor. Or at least he was, until he seemingly moved on

But then in ACOSF, in the ONE POV we get from Azriel…he is showing desire for only Elain.

Now, keep in mind: This is after his interactions with Mor, after his interactions with Gw*n, the hordes of women in Velaris, etc. And yet… he is only showing attraction and feelings for Elain.

If this man just wanted a quickie, you really think he’d have to go to such lengths for that? I’m betting he’s everyone in the IC’s hall pass 😭 This is not a man that needs to elaborately scheme to get laid 😭

And if this man just wanted a mate, you think he’d be chasing after the one female he KNOWS is already mated? He KNOWS she is not his mate. With that logic, wouldn’t he be looking towards anyone BUT Elain?

You can’t be out here saying “Azriel only wants a mate” and then in the same breath saying “Azriel only feels lust”. Which is it? Is he looking for only his partner in eternal-everlasting love or is he just looking for sex? Those two cannot exist at the same time for the same person in one instance.

And before you reply all indignant and huffy, I should tell you that yes, I have heard the ridiculous other explanation from antis saying “well he has a lot of issues so he goes for unavailable women because he’s not ready to be loved and deep down he knows that” 🤡

Do I need to deign that with a response? Now you’re saying “He only wants a mate but he isn’t ready for a mate so he then wants only lust with Elain”. Make it make sense. Please tell me where in his POV it says any of this, and it might help me understand how you came up with all these words. You are making assumptions, on top of assumptions. We do not know ANYTHING about this man. He has ONE POV and in it all he does is dream about Elain and have some banter with his trainee. How are y’all coming up with such a complex, deep layered backstory and user guide for Azriel when we don’t know shit about him?? We don’t even know his last name ffs. How are you out here advocating as his personal therapist??

Just read the words on the page as they are. They paint a clear enough picture.

Call it lust. Call it love. Call it attraction. Call it whatever you want - but there is something worth acknowledging between Elain and Azriel. Something important enough that SJM published an entire bonus chapter about it.

People speculated they might be a thing throughout ACOMAF-ACOFAS, but then that bonus chapter came out and clear as day you can see them so down bad for each other, they’re ready to risk it all while everyone’s still snoring upstairs. You think either of them would’ve risked that for a one-night stand 🤡🤡?

….

And do we really think if the next book was Azriel x Other Character, SJM would start it off with him fantasizing about getting on his knees for another woman? Sure the very first love interest might not be endgame for SJM… but both Az & Elain have had other LIs (Mor, Graysen, Lucien even). They are not each others first, but they are certainly each others last.

They are the only pairing currently mutually attracted to each other. They aren’t fully in love yet (that we know of), but there is something there. That’s what their book will then explore. The idea that despite fate, despite politics, despite everything against them, Az & Elain will choose each other.

But I thought that was obvious 🤷🏻‍♀️

#elriel #azriel #elain archeron #elain x azriel #pro elain #acotar #elain

[dnalt-d2]

Christ alive can anyone get a break right now??

(Ahem)

Update time, once again!

Also once again, it is a mixed bag

So to start off with, as most everyone knows, Pomme and Dapper's admins have resigned from their positions. This is incredibly unfortunate, and I honestly don't know what it's gonna mean for the French Creators who said they wouldn't stay on QSMP if Pomme's Admin was fired. Since she technically left of her own volition, I really don't know what they're gonna do

(Edit: I talk about Quackity's stream here but I don't speak Spanish so I can't personally say what was said exactly. Thankfully, it looks like someone JUST POSTED an English Translation so I'm just gonna drop the link here for anyone who wants to read it)

On another note: Quackity has finally given a slight update. For obvious reasons, he can't say anything specific, and I wouldn't have expected him to. But according to the translations I've seen so far, basically said that he can't update because the leaks that happened are creating added complications in the restructuring process. I'm assuming his reason for that is that he simply doesn't want anymore information to be leaked out, but unfortunately, that's just counterproductive to the miscommunication problem

AND SPEAKING OF MISCOMMUNICATION???

So as you all know, I've been in support of the French Union getting involved with this. As I've stated a dozen times now, Unions are meant to be resources, people who inform employees of their rights and do what they can to help them get those rights. As far as I know, one of the main things they do is mediate between the employees and the employers. But APPARENTLY the Union has not attempted to reach out to Quackity outside of Twitter. Which REALLY isn't all that professional. Twitter is a NETWORKING site. Meant to START building connections. Afterwards, people typically move onto email or even discord, which are way better equipped for the long-form communication that's about to have to happen

So even if Quackity WAS active on Twitter, which he isn't. And even if the Union DIDN'T know that, which they do. This isn't the right route to communicate. They have stated that he "has their email" and has to "reach out to them." They are apparently working on the logic that SOMEONE would have had to pass on the information to him by this point, which isn't a fair assumption at all, considering that we know there were Admins ALREADY hiding information from him before all this

They're acting like Quackity is the CEO of a major corporation, with COUNTLESS RESOURCES on-hand. Yeah he's the CEO of this business, but he's also a 23-year-old Twitch Streamer who in all likelihood is learning a LOT about running a business for the first time AS WE SPEAK. I'll tell you right now, when I was 23, I didn't know jack-shit, and I'd still say I don't most of the time. And the only reason I LEARNED jack-shit was because someone would actually TELL me about it. When someone makes mistakes, it REALLY helps them learn when someone is able to not just point out the mistake, but also HOW to fix it. I don't know how they're expecting him to grow from his miscommunication mistakes when they aren't willing to give him the chance to

And yes, there are MANY problems that need to be fixed, as I've said before. But Quackity did outright confirm some of the other things I've said too. That things ARE happening, and we aren't hearing about it. That we aren't GOING to hear about it. Which is fine. It makes sense. We aren't the people who need to know every step of the process. But he is going to have to figure out a better system for talking to the Admins. It's a real problem when he's communicating with people like Aypierre that Pomme's Admin has her job still, but didn't tell the Admin herself

There's still lots of problems, and I know it sounds like I'm just repeating myself, saying to wait and see, but in reality, there isn't much else we CAN do besides that and voice our support

This might be the last time I make a post on this for a bit, because this has been a little draining on me. Which I would normally be able to handle SUPER easy, I'm pretty good at handling stuff like this well enough. But now I've also got real-life stuff reminding me that no matter how much better things SEEM to be getting for me, something's gonna come smack me in the back of the head to remind me that actually things suck, and I just should've known better! And unfortunately that stuff requires my focus more than this. I'll still be here, watching everything, maybe commenting on stuff, but I might not be quite as vocal as I have been

Once again, I remind you all, take care of yourselves first and foremost. Whether it's physical, emotional, or mental, or whatever else. You matter more than the events taking place here right now. My support goes out to all of you, as well as the Admins who VERY WELL COULD BE SEEING THIS APPARENTLY. So I guess this message goes out to them as well lol. You guys rock and I've enjoyed all the contributions you've made

Anyways, see you all later

#qsmp #qsmp admin situation #admin situation #qadmin situation #quackity #qsmp quackity

[comicaurora]

(this ask is based on the, I'm not sure if unfounded, assumption that at least 1/6(?) main crew members has some sort of non-ace/aro attraction): How do you write allo characters as an aro person? I'm one of those annoying allos who's *hyper-romantic* and working on hypersexuality for my own health, so I color most of my writing with that and struggle to write ace people. I know a lot of writers can distance themselves more. I guess I'm just curious how you inspire your characters to act socially outside of the way that you interact, specifically in terms of romanti/sexual relationships. I'm pretty good at getting my characters to engage with the world outside of my way of doing it until it comes to romance.

It's… tough, and I'm working on it. I still need to remind myself that a lot of people legitimately do experience sexual attraction and thus find certain other people in certain situations extremely physically appealing, in contrast to my own platonic attraction (the people I like, I typically like the same amount no matter what they're doing or how they look) or aesthetic attraction (when I like how someone looks in a specific situation, it is still in an extremely hands-off "I'd like to draw that" way).

I can work my way through the logic of romance, I think. I've been told that it doesn't feel the same as friendship, and that it places another person in a somewhat uniquely structural role for one's life. I've heard it described as being someone's "everything-team" - the person they want by their side at any endeavor - which is the only thing I've ever heard about romance that I don't think applies to a good percentage of my IRL friendships.

Romantic attraction is definitely the more confusing one, because everyone I know in a romantic relationship insists it's different than their platonic ones, but can't really explain why or how, only that it is. The thing is, this makes me believe them more. I know how hard it is to explain a unique inner experience to someone who has a completely different one. Their partner is their best friend, or at least top three (understandable) and also in a unique position in their life (confusion??) I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything, and I think I love my friends as much as I'm capable of, and there are people I'm friends with who I could see as a theoretical partner - except that it would change absolutely nothing about our current relationship. This is why I don't identify with the label of "aromantic" where I definitely do with "asexual", because I think I experience what people are talking about, I just feel it kinda everywhere instead of nowhere.

So the hack I think I can make work to do this in my writing is:

Sexual attraction is like aesthetic attraction, but with a hands-on component. Replace "I want to draw that" with "I want to get my hands on that" and go from there.

Romantic attraction is evidently its own beast, but it contains concepts like "I trust this person implicitly," "I care about them and want them to be happy," "I would be happy coming home to this person," "I want to protect them," "I like that they care about me," and "this person helps me see the world in a different way" which are all individual sentiments I understand, even if I personally feel them about a large number of people rather than a single Special Someone. Point them at a single Someone and have the two characters involved act accordingly, and I can probably pull a romance out of it.

Like all writing-an-alien-situation stuff, it mostly pays to identify the specific details that correlate to things you DO understand and then extrapolate from there. Or you can fake it and black-box their motivations and be like "here's where I'd put their sexual attraction to each other if I had one"

#asks #writing stuff

[serpentpatrol]

Astro Observation: Aries ♈️ Part 1

🔎Discretion: consider zodiac signs, aspects, and placements in a birth chart as a map of the soul, it gives you direction on how to recognize its influence or impact within you, as the saying goes: "the stars impels; they don't compel". These observations also depends on degrees, houses, aspects to planets and mostly the free will of the person. Your birth chart gives you information about the pattern of how your energy plays out in the universe but in the end it's your own free will which is the one that decides on how to manage the energy.

🔥 Well known fact about Aries or Aries placements being very independent individuals, they don't like when someone is being emotionally or literally clingy towards them, they will probably show some distance or remain objective if they have to engage in social activity with someone or some groups.

🔥There is a lighthearted cheerful expression in Aries suns (when they are in a good or balanced mood) which brings simplicity in connecting with them, there is no wishy washy, heavy atmosphere or uncertainty with them, they are direct when it comes to what they want to share or want to plan with others.

🔥 When it comes to reaching their goals, Aries suns are daredevils and they can be detailed-oriented about it too like Virgos but this comes from their passion to start something and being very cardinal about it. Whatever activities they pursue they thoroughly gather all of its information and able to execute those plans quickly though it might not last long or not in a slow steady progress like earth placements (Capricorn or Taurus) but they could manage to create and manifest those plans into actions and reality.

🔥 Martian planet which ruled both Scorpios and Aries could make these individuals especially the females to be mentally tomboys, there is a power or femme/homme fatale energy exudes from them which is not the submissive type, totally dominant. Take a look at Lisa (Aries Sun) from Blackpink danced to 'Tomboy' by Destiny Rogers 👇🏻 as an easy general example that you can see in her attitude ✨️

🔥 Those who have Aries placements expresses themselves in two different ways: book smart or artistic smart (be it through music, poems, diverse interests, etc). They have a creative mind or sagacious intellect to understand and engage in certain topics or activities.

🔥 These folks are protective like a warrior defending their own kingdom, being a fire element, this reminds me of Dracula from the movie Dracula Untold and Bram Stoker's Dracula. Both Draculas were being played by Aries men, Luke Evans (Aries Sun, Aries Mars) and Gary Oldman (Aries Sun, Aries Moon).

🔥 Aries Mars can be so quick in showing upsetness or being emotionally triggered. To a point of judging the person who they feel annoyed with, quick in making assumptions (which they need to learn to balance because not everything they think as logical or making sense are the ultimate truth). Based on the early zodiacal order besides Taurus, Cancer, Gemini, the Aries energy is centered to self, mostly capable in thinking or stating opinions or thoughts only from the personal perspective/point of view. And this could create heated ego debate or arguments with others, because they like to win.

©SerpentPatrol

#aries #zodiac #zodiac sign #astro notes #tropical astrology #astrology #astro observations #astro community #aries man #ariesman #aries woman #arieswoman #ariesfemale #aries female #aries male #ariesmale #taurus #gemini #leo #cancer #virgo #libra #scorpio #sagittarius #capricorn #aquarius #pisces

[femmefatalevibe]

Femme Fatale Guide: How To Handle Rude People & Insulting Comments With Class

Table of Contents:

Stop taking things personally

Seek clarity, not competition

(Calmly) Share your truth when necessary

De-escalate, disengage, and/or redirect the interaction

How To Handle Insults & Rude People With Class:

Stop taking things personally. Other people's hostility is a coping mechanism for their lack of inner work and healing.

Seek clarity, not competition. Most of the time, people's insults are intentional. They usually want to get an emotional reaction out of you. They want to feed their ego and underlying needs for validation rather than seek to add value or facilitate connection through their words and conversations. Rather than get defensive, call out the behavior by asking the perpetrator of the negative comment to explain the implication of their statement. Play a little dumb and ask "What did you mean by that?" Allow those with bad intentions to tell on themselves. Most people with some degree of self-awareness will either try to gloss over and move on from their comment after seeing that you're too secure with yourself to entertain these low-value comments. Individuals who use this desire for clarity as an opportunity to overexplain their rude commentary almost always tell on themselves – their motives, insecurities, and deep need for self-acceptance and social validation.

(Calmly) Share your truth when necessary. If someone is trying to spread lies about you, discredit your reputation, or defame your character, state the facts about the situation without bringing emotions into the discussion or conflict. Remember: Remaining unbothered does not equate to being a doormat. Stand up for yourself –speak using a neutral tone and only state facts about yourself, your actions, conversations, or any logistics related to the given situation. Do not make accusations or assumptions about the person or the rude commentary they've made. Present their words and actions in a clinical, matter-of-fact manner to show the faulty of their logic rather than firing back with an equally-detrimental attempt to defame their character or give them the social spotlight and attention they're looking for in the moment.

De-escalate, disengage, and/or redirect the interaction. Don't allow their rude behavior to affect your external presence. Try your absolute best to not appear frustrated, raise your voice, or throw back any negative comments. Agree to disagree. Express the pettiness of this conflict. Either walk away or move on to another topic of conversation. Remind yourself that you're dealing with a wounded person. Feeding into their rude commentary is only deepening the cracks and encouraging these negative patterns of behavior.

Validate your emotions. Seek emotional support if necessary. Dealing with combative people can be draining, so remember that it is okay to feel hurt, depleted, sad, or any other negative emotions after the interaction. Schedule a therapy appointment or confide in a trusted member of your support system if you need to talk these matters out to release some of the emotional stress or tension.

#femme fatale #social interaction #socializing #social skills #emotional maturity #interpersonal relationships #communication skills #conflict resolution #boundaries #self confidence #self awareness #dark feminine energy #dark femininity #it girl #the feminine urge #high value woman #female excellence #dream girl #queen energy #high value mindset #higher self #growth mindset #mature woman #adulting #standing up for yourself #female power #femmefatalevibe

[hopeyarts]

IN ORDER TO LIVE IN THE KINGDOM OF ROSAS, DO YOU NEED TO GIVE UP YOUR WISH TO KING MAGNIFICO?

🌟———————————————————————

Genuine question, because I’ve seen some people say you do need to give up your wish to him and I’ve seen others who’ve said that you don’t.

Personally, I believe that you DO need to give up your wish to the king, but not because something in the movie told me so. I only think this from a logical standpoint. I’m not saying that the idea that you need to give up your wish is TRUE, nor am I denying that people don’t need to. This is just a little thoughtful speculation I had. Hear me out.

Say that people DON’T need to give up their wishes in order to live in Rosas. Some people decide to give him their wishes in hopes of getting them granted anyways, while others decide to keep their wishes. So now we have King Magnifico keeping most of the given wishes in the wishing chamber forever and protects those wishes. Then we have Asha say that it’s wrong for him to hoard the given wishes and not return the wishes he won’t grant back to their respective owners. King Magnifico responds by saying that the point of people coming here and giving up their wishes is because the journey to them is too hard. He doesn’t say anything about if he gives back the wishes, then something bad could possibly happen if people pursued their wishes themselves. But it IS hinted that’s what he means because in the movie he takes people’s wishes in hopes to reduce greed and having greedy people in the kingdom (though ngl that just made people more greedy unfortunately for him).

I’m not going to talk about who is right in the concept of keeping or giving back ungranted wishes.

Back to my explanation! So if King Magnifico hoards the wishes because he thinks they are dangerous, then why let people who haven’t given up their wishes live in the kingdom? Those people who haven’t given him their wishes (I’m talking about citizens 18+ because that’s the requirement to give him your wish) could have a dangerous wish within them and walk around the kingdom with that wish in their heart as they please. See what I mean?

(GYATTTT🗣️🔇🔇 im sorry. and this is supposed to be a gif but whatev…)

For example…

Say person A and person B arrive at Rosas and decide to live there. They are both given the option to give up their wishes to the king in hopes for them to be granted, but are still allowed to live in Rosas no matter which choice they pick. Person A gives up their wish (say that their wish is really anything, it doesn’t matter in this example), but Person B decides to keep their wish (say that their wish is vague or has the possibility of dangerous consequences (also, I don’t believe that any of the citizens’ wishes are bad-intentioned because King Magnifico said that it is their hearts desire and it is the wish from the very BEST and PURE part of someone’s heart. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t vague enough to have bad consequences/outcomes or be dangerous, even if not intentioned)). So King Magnifico knows what person A’s wish is and decides to lock it up because he think it’ll result in something bad. Okay, great whatever. But oh wait! He doesn’t know what person B’s wish is and he doesn’t know if their wish could have bad results if granted or pursued. He doesn’t KNOW about it and he can’t SEE it because that person didn’t give their wish to him.

Does that make sense? So this brings me back to my primary question. If people don’t need to give their wishes to the king in order to live in the kingdom of Rosas, what is the point in hoarding the wishes given to him when he doesn’t know the wishes of the people who haven’t given them up to him? He can’t make a hypothesis and not even an assumption on person B’s wish or intentions or dreams or goals because he doesn’t have their wish. And he just allowed them to live in the kingdom!

So what would be the difference in danger between person A’s given wish and person B’s ungiven wish when King Magnifico can’t properly defend his statement and reasoning on the whole ‘greedy people thing’ and not giving back given wishes he won’t grant? How does a given wish make it any more harmful than an ungiven wish in his eyes? It just doesn’t make sense to me if the case is that you DON’T need to give up your wish in order to live in Rosas.

Now this is the part where I’m taking stuff from the movie now to back up my reasoning. So at the end of the movie, we see all 1,923 wishes (yes, that’s how many there are 😭) are sent back to their original owners. We see that EVERYBODY gets their wish back, aside from the kids of course and Valentino. When I take in this scene, I am basically told by the movie that every qualified citizen gave up their wish. Could the possibility that they had the choice on whether to give their wish up or not to King Magnifico and still live in Rosas either way is true? Maybe. But it seems highly unlikely because it can be debunked by King Magnifico’s statement on keeping people safe and his attempt to stop greedy thieves and his refusal to return the wishes he won’t grant. It forces his statement of ‘preventing another disaster from happening’ to make no sense if he lets people who haven’t given up their wishes to him live there ANYWAYS.

If someone has anything they’d like to add, feel free to share! This is just a genuine question and I’d like to understand more if the case really is that qualified people (those 18+) can live in Rosas anyways without giving up their wishes and keeping it with themselves the entire time.

Thanks for reading! 💖

#wish #wish 2023 #disney wish #wish movie #wish king magnifico #king magnifico #disney king magnifico #disney asha #wish asha #asha #genuine question #analysis? #maybe lol #kingdom of rosas #wish fandom #wishes #hopeyarts #fypシ

[awesomefringey]

I need to get this off my chest because its just killing me these past 2 days. I was a larrie, now turned neutral. I love them both so much and I adore them both separately. Their music literally saved me and they will forever be my fave. Do I think they were once in a relationship, yes! Like you can clearly see till the end of 1d we had pretty clear idea about it as well. For the next few years, their lyrics, them signing towards a relationship, etc gave them off. I was sure about their relationship till then. I also understood that there were some hitches here and there. But for the past few years they have mostly kept the topic of larry closed. I have now grown up enough to understand that we literally don't even know 1% of their actual lives so how can we assume that they have a relationship when we have literally not gotten some clue more than a bit of blue greening from their side which amounts to nothing. Like we dk if they broke up or do they just want a pvt relationship yk so why are we so set on making assumptions? Why are we interfering so much? Like back in 2015, with rbb and sbb, larry wanted us to take a hint and talk about it. They wanted to show their love through these hints they dropped. Now they just don't want it these days so why cant we understand that and just support their music without searching for "hints" in each of their actions or posts? Here by we, I mean larries. And what I have seen is that tumblr larries are smart and understand this all. Whereas twitter larries are just becoming too senseless and even a bit annoying without actually giving it all a thought. Like girl, just think about it logically and stop acting like a fool. They really need to take a step back and analyze a bit.

I think the biggest delusion that WE as a fandom fell for in the last couple of years was to believe LARRIES are a community of people with shared values and interests.

This fandom fell apart the second the individual became more important than the collective. Everyone’s the main character now. Being a fan of Larry has become a lifestyle that has to fit personal interests first and foremost.

And depending on how self-righteous people are to think that makes them smarter than everyone else a different stance will get berated, ridiculed and met with an arrogance that is hard to understand considering we all sit in the same boat.

My advice to “Larries” would be to stop making each and every single opinion everyone else’s problem. Maybe we can breathe a little and let each other be, huddle with our moots and be peaceful, that’d be nice.

#ask #fandom experience

[echofromtheabyss]

Medium talk is worse than small talk and probably what we're all most afraid of

We all know Small Talk:

hi, how are you, nice weather, how about them (insert sports team here).

Small talk follows algorithms and a kind of ritual pattern. It's the kind of appropriate conversation level for interacting with retail workers in public, and total strangers.

We also all know Big Talk. (I'm only calling it that as the logical inverse implied by Small Talk.) Which is basically where a high degree of familiarity is assumed. A common ND fuckup is conversing in conversational modes that, to many of the general population, are reserved for high familiarity. Either in terms of talking at length about a topic (which I feel is something that was actually more socially acceptable in the past, but has become broadly unacceptable over time; this was NOT really part of a diagnostic category in the 70s) or in terms of overfamiliarity/not being at the right level of social distance from the person for the thing you're talking about.

Most people rely on lots of context cues that inform how they will hear what the other person is saying, and those context cues may not be there for a near-stranger. All they're left with is the most uncharitable possible assumption about your intentions.

So with this in mind, this leaves me with the WORST conversation category, that nobody acknowledges, because we're stuck on Small Talk and Big Talk:

Medium Talk.

You actually need something in common with the other person or something you relate to, to really successfully do Medium Talk. Small talk can be done with total strangers you're never going to see again, and Big Talk can cut past a lot of stuff; I don't need every social belongingness or ideological thing or hobby in common with my family members, or other people in a high-trust relationship with me, to have a meaningful conversation with them.

Medium Talk is actually where a lot of the tripwires and landmines are.

People are making decisions to escalate or de-escalate here, and listening for loyalty indicators. You run the risk of keeping things superficial while missing an actual connectedness bid, or of being overly familiar - or getting too comfortable and offending/scaring the other person before they have any context for processing what you're saying to them.

Medium Talk is when you're moving from the Social Niceties, along the continuum toward Big Talk. You're dipping your toe in the water, moving toward the deep end.

Average to high social skills people will often throw out feelers about escalating the conversation. In the 90s, LGBT people would sometimes drop hints about some or other thing that only other LGBT people would know about, based upon some kind of context cue. There is ultimately some of this same dynamic going on with some forms of nerdy gatekeeping ("name one star war") albeit in a clumsy way.

But people do it all the time.

I think there is a tendency for some people to assume talk is 100% verbal while habitually ignoring the visual and relational context cues that are processed as communication. It's especially hard for people who *can't* process that information, but I think that there are lots of reasons some people end up just not learning to do it.

People often escalate small talk based upon presence of some kind of marker such as a nerdy enamel pin, or a sports jersey. This is what wearing tons of geek swag is actually all about. 70s-80s social skills guides and advice for single people, often advised having/carrying/wearing some kind of "conversation starter."

Once I learned about 70s/80s/90s gay hanky code, I realized that there was a lot of this going on in all kinds of ways and that people scan other people visually for various kinds of context cues for the escalation of small talk.

A big problem is getting too "real" too fast, and people in the Medium Talk Zone will commonly use celebrities, low-stakes fandom stuff, and the like as socially acceptable proxies for discussing their viewpoints while saving face. If you are still in a low trust space, then the problem with just blurting stuff out to another person is that they don't know you well enough to have any context for what you are saying.

Most people are processing a ton of context cues while you are speaking, besides the words you are saying. When still in a low trust zone, you are likely to be taken in bad faith. You saying the same thing that their friend said, is not being heard by their brains as actually the same thing.

Nor is your presentation of the project being heard by the boss as being the same presentation that is being given by the shinier co-worker who steals it from you.

Most people don't just process the information, they process *who is saying it* as a *necessary part* of that information.

And this is where Medium Talk is so dicey.

Small Talk? No problem. Most of us can do it on a good day and most of us do it without realizing how much we do it.