#work on him. and you can say 'well he doesn't have a connection to dean because soulless reasons' but. i mean. that's false. clearly.

[quietwingsinthesky]

soulless sam was at his best when he was still being written as a version of sam, to accentuate parts of him that normally get held back, and not as 'guess he's evil now'. soulless sam when he's reflecting sam's tendency to lose sight of everything else in pursuit of a goal. soulless sam when he's just kind of rude without thinking about it without his filter on. soulless sam when he's equal parts intent on keeping dean with him and also happy to lie to him and keep him shut out of the things he knows dean won't like so that dean won't leave. soulless sam when he equally recognizes that he is a better hunter now, and also that he probably can't continue to exist without his soul. (you know. before they went along with making him just kind of evil.)

...soulless sam when he's begging for literally anyone to acknowledge his autonomy in this situation and not force him to take his soul back without knowing how much it could damage him and being ignored.

#i have normal thoughts about this man #i love the soulless sam arc actually until it nosedives #i love how it gives us a new lens to examine sam through #i love that soulless sam isn't even really! malicious! he's just exactly what he says: a better hunter! #like the most Bad thing he does is inarguably dean vampire transformation #but id point out that. that gives us even more fascinating stuff to analyze about him #like for one. sam knows not only About the cure but about how dean can't drink blood for it to work. right? #so what can we deduce from this: 1) he is not arbitrarily risking his brother. he is making from his pov the most logical decisions to kill #the vamps they're after. and 2) soulless sam without a doubt believes that dean will resist drinking blood. because otherwise the cure won' #work on him. and you can say 'well he doesn't have a connection to dean because soulless reasons' but. i mean. that's false. clearly. #even if all it is is leftover feelings of responsibility towards dean and familiarity and knowing that dean's a good hunter. #that's still a connection! dean *does* matter to him! and soulless sam believes he wont go for blood. that dean can't. #(sidenote if dean did? i dont think soulless would have killed him. this is sam & dean we're talking about. #soul or not. vampire or not. sam is keeping him around.) #anyway the point of this is that soulless sam is both Very Simple to understand and Very Complex when you get into the details of it #but on the basic level he is just sam's drive to hunt unattached from morality. he is just a better hunter. #i like that characterization far better than 'he is evil and wants to do murder and bad things' #oh and also he fucks people's wives. he's fun like that. #soulless!sam #spn #sam winchester

[scoobydoodean]

I love the juxtaposition between Dean and Cas's reactions to Raphael in 5.03, when Raphael says God is dead and they just want this all to be over. There are tears in Raphael's eyes when he says it, and Cas mirrors him. The empathy he feels for Raphael—despite everything—is evident.

Dean though? Dean is mocking Raphael.

RAPHAEL: Do you think God would have let any of that happen if He were alive? DEAN: Oh yeah? Well then who invented the Chinese basket trick? RAPHAEL: Careful. That's my Father you're talking about, boy. DEAN: Yeah, who would be so proud to know His sons started the frigging apocalypse. RAPHAEL: Who ran off and disappeared. Who left no instructions and a world to run. DEAN: Daddy ran away and disappeared. He didn't happen to work for the post office, did He?

I think a lot of what Dean says is for Cas's benefit. Dean's caught on that god means a lot to Cas by now—he'd be stupid not to (especially after their fight in 5.02). Cas needs to believe his father cares and loves him and will help if Cas can just find him. So even though Dean himself thinks god is a deadbeat who doesn't give a shit, he mocks and belittle's Raphael's perspective and throws in the joke about the post office as an in-joke with Cas, purely for Cas's benefit, to try and lighten the mood. At the end of the episode, Dean encourages Cas not to give up hope. He tells him that if he believes his father is out there, he should follow his convictions and keep searching.

The other component of this though... is that Cas and Raphael are living through something with their own father that Dean has already lived... and Raphael and Michael's solution is to kill everybody about it.

So Dean goes, "Oh, so your dad left you with all of his responsibilities and then just disappeared? Boo hoo so sad." Like he is speaking from the perspective of someone who does know what it's like to be abandoned with the bag, and from the perspective of that lived experience, he is saying their actions are not justified—they are not acceptable. They don't get to take their daddy issues out on the world just because daddy is a deadbeat.

RAPHAEL: This is funny to you? You're living in a godless universe. DEAN: And? What, you and the other kids just decided to throw an apocalypse while He was gone? RAPHAEL: We're tired. We just want it to be over. We just want...paradise. DEAN: So, what, God dies and makes you the boss and you decide you can do whatever you want?

And there's another connection to Dean here in that Raphael says he's tired. When Raphael says that, he is repeating something Dean said way back in 2.09, when the weight of John's last words was crushing him. John left Dean with responsibility for Sam's demonic destiny, which has now actually come to fruition in the form of the apocalypse. Dean has been blamed twice for the apocalypse already (5.01, 5.02) by Zachariah and Cas, because he didn't stop Sam in time.

So Raphael feels chained by his father's responsibilities and orders that are too big, and Dean has felt chained to Sam and Sam's destiny since season 2 (and chained to Sam more generally through parentification before then). They are both sons whose father left them with the bag—with responsibilities they just can't handle. They both just want it to be over (Dean does not want to feel responsible for Sam!!! He says that in 5.02 AND at the end of 5.03). But what Raphael and Michael are doing? Well. They're fucking killing everyone because they can't deal. Raphael thinks they can create some kind of paradise through destruction, but it's a fucking pipe dream. He isn't solving anything at all.

#5.03 #parentification #season 5 #raphael #pk rewatches spn number ? #cas and god

[layce2015]

Supernatural (Dean Winchester x Female!Reader)

Bloodlust

Masterlist

"Whoo! Listen to her purr! Have you ever heard anything so sweet?" Dean asked Sam and I as we roared down the road in the newly fixed up Impala. "You know, if you two wanna get a room, just let Sam and me know, Dean." I teased as I lean forward on the backseat and Sam laughs.

"Oh, don't listen to her, baby. She doesn't understand us." Dean said and I rolled my eyes but I laugh. "You're in a good mood." Sam pointed out.

"Why shouldn't I be?" Dean asked. "No reason." Sam said. "Got my car, got a case, things are looking up." Dean said. "Wow. Give you a couple of severed heads and a pile of dead cows and you're Mister Sunshine." I said and Dean laughs at this.

"How far to Red Lodge?" He asked. "Uh, about another three hundred miles." Sam said. "Good." Dean said and he floors it.

"The murder investigation is ongoing, and that's all I can share with the press at this time." The sheriff of Red Lodge said to me and the boys, since the three of us were acting like reporters. "Sure, sure, we understand that, but just for the record, you found the first, uh, head last week, correct?" Sam asked and the Sheriff nodded.

"Okay, and the other, a uh, Christina Flanigan..." I said. "That was two days ago. Is there --" The sheriff said but then there was a knock at his door and he looks up at her and nods.

"Oh. Sorry, time's up, we're done here." He said. "One last question --" Sam started to say until Dean talks over him. "Yeah, what about the cattle?" He asked and the Sheriff looks at us, shocked. "Excuse me?"

"You know, the cows found dead, split open, drained ... over a dozen cases." Dean said to him. "What about them?" The sheriff asked.

"So you don't think there's a connection?" I asked him. "Connection...with...?" The sheriff said, confused. "First cattle mutilations, now two murders? Kinda sounds like ritual stuff." Sam said. "You know, like satanic cult ritual stuff?" Dean said and the man begins to laugh but realized our serious faces.

"You - you're not kidding." He said, stunned. "No." I said. "Those cows aren't being mutilated. You wanna know how I know?" He said to us. "How?" Sam asked. "Because there's no such thing as cattle mutilation. Cow drops, leave it in the sun, within forty eight hours the bloat'll split it open so clean it's just about surgical. The bodily fluids fall down into the ground and get soaked up because that's what gravity does. But, hey, it could be Satan. What newspaper did you say you work for?" The sheriff said and the boys and I exchange a look.

"World Weekly News..."

"Weekly World News."

"World -"

"Weekly... I'm new." Dean said to him as we give nervous look towards him. "Get out of my office." The sheriff growls at us.

The boys and I enter the morgue, still wearing our shirts and ties with some white lab coats over us. The intern on duty was sitting at the desk and Dean looks him over before he approaches the man. "John." He said and the man stands up, quickly. "Jeff." The man corrected. "Jeff. I know that." Dean laughs.

"Dr. Dworkin needs to see you in his office right away." Dean said to Jeff. "But Dr. Dworkin's on vacation." Jeff said, confused. "Well, he's back. And he's pissed, and he's screaming for you, man, so if I were you I would..." Dean said before he whistles and Jeff runs away.

"Okay." He mutters and we go towards the lockers where they keep the bodies. "Hey, those satanists in Florida, they marked their victims, didn't they?" Dean asked us. "Yeah, reversed pentacle on the forehead." Sam replied. "Yeah. So much f'd up crap happens in Florida." Dean mutters as he hands Sam and I a couple pair of latex gloves and puts on a pair of his own.

Sam opens a compartment and wheels out a corpse; there's a box between its legs. "All right, open it." Dean said to Sam. "You open it." Sam said and Dean rolls his eyes. "Wuss." Dean grumbles and he carries the box over to another table and flips off the lid, grimacing. Sam and I approach it, this made both of us cringe as we look at the head.

"Well, no pentagram." I said once I look over the body. "Wow. Poor girl." Sam mutters, sadly. "Maybe we should, uh, you know, look in her mouth, see if those wackos stuffed anything down her throat. You know, kinda like the moth in Silence of the Lambs." Dean said. "Yeah, here, go ahead." Sam said as he pushes the box to Dean. "No, you go ahead." Dean said and I roll my eyes.

"What?" Sam said, confused. "Put the lotion in the basket." Dean mimics, quoting the Silence of the Lambs. "Oh, for God's sake." I said and I take the box then glare at Dean. "And Sam's the wuss?" I said then I start poking my fingers into the mouth.

But then I furrow my brow as I noticed a hole in the gums. "What is that, a hole?" I said and Dean leans in a bit then presses on the gum and a narrow, sharp tooth descends. "It's a tooth." Sam said, shocked.

"Sam, that's a fang. Retractable set of vampire fangs." I said as I look at the boys. "You gotta be kidding me." Dean said, exasperated. "Well, this changes things." Sam said. "Ya think?" Dean said, sarcastically.

We pull up near a local bar then we enter the building and go towards the bar. I look around the bar and noticed an African American man sitting at a table, staring at me and the boys. I nod at him as we go up to the bar and look to the bartender.

"How's it going?" Dean asked the bartender. "Living the dream. What can I get for you?" The bartender asked us. "Three beers, please." Dean said and the guy nods and hands hs our beers.

"So, we're looking for some people." Sam said to him. "Sure. Hard to be lonely." The bartender said. "Yeah. But um, that's not what he meant." I said and I pull out a $50 bill, fingering it, and drop it on the bar. The bartender looks at it, then takes it. "Right. So these, these people, they would have moved here about six months ago, probably pretty rowdy, like to drink..." I said. "Yeah, real night owls, you know? Sleep all day, party all night." Dean adds.

"Barker farm got leased out a couple months ago. Real winners. They've been in here a lot - drinkers. Noisy. I've had to 86 them once or twice." The bartender replied. "Thanks." Dean said and we leave our half-finished beers on the table and leave.

We head outside then go down an alley, then we hid just as we see that African American man following us. He comes up to the alley and looks around for us. We go over to him and pin him up to the wall, Dean had a knife at his throat.

"Smile." Dean demanded and the man looks at us, confused. "What?" He asked. "Show us those pearly whites." I said. "Oh, for the love of --you want to stick that thing someplace else? I'm not a vampire." The man said to Dean and I frown. "Yeah, that's right. I heard you guys in there." The man said.

"What do you know about vampires?" Sam asked him. "How to kill them. Now seriously, bro. That knife's making me itch." The man said to Dean, who  cocks his head. The man starts to pull away but Sam pins him harder.

"Whoa. Easy there, Chachi." The man said and he slowly brings his right hand to his lip, pulls it back, revealing normal gums. "See? Fangless. Happy?" He asked us and Dean lets up. "Now. Who the hell are you?" Dean asked him.

"Sam and Dean Winchester. (Y/n) (l/n). I can't believe it. You know I met both of your fathers once? Hell of a couple of guys. Great hunters. I heard they passed. I'm sorry. It's big shoes. But from what I hear you guys fill 'em. Great trackers, good in a tight spot --" Gordon said. "You seem to know a lot about our family." I said, curiously.

"Word travels fast. You know how hunters talk." Gordon said. "No, we don't, actually." Dean said and I shrug. "Kinda sorta." I said. "I guess there's a lot your dads never told you, huh?" Gordon said and I roll my eyes at him.

"So, um, so those two vampires, they were yours, huh?" Sam asked him. "Yep. Been here two weeks." Gordon replied. "Did you check out that Barker farm?" asked Dean. "It's a bust. Just a bunch of hippie freaks. Though they could kill you with that patchouli smell alone." Gordon replied.

"Where's the nest, then?" I asked him.  I got this one covered. Look, don't get me wrong. It's a real pleasure meetin' you three. But I've been on this thing over a year. I killed a fang back in Austin, tracked the nest all the way up here. I'll finish it." Gordon assured us.

"We could help." Dean chimed. "Thanks, but uh, I'm kind of a go-it-alone type of guy." Gordon said. "Come on, man, I"ve been itching for a hunt." Dean said, desperately. "Sorry. But hey, I hear there's a Chupacabra two states over. You go ahead and knock yourselves out." Gordon said and he gets into his car. "It was real good meeting you, though. I'll buy you a drink on the flip side." He said and he starts his car and drives off.

We followed Gordon to a mill and see him enter the building. We get out of the Impala and run after him. At one point, we heard the sound of an electric saw and we run faster. There we see the vampire had Gordon pinned down and was bringing the saw down towards him.

Sam and I pull Gordon to safety while Dean attacks the vampire. He pins the vampire under the electric saw, lowers the saw and decapitate the vampire. Sam, Gordon and I stare at this in shock as Dean turns to us, blood splattered over his face.

"So uh, I guess I gotta buy you that drink." Gordon said while I give a worried look towards Dean.

Later that night, we were sitting around a table in the bar and a waitress brings us another round. Dean reaches for his wallet l but Gordon holds up his hand. "No, no, I got it." He said. "Come on." Dean said to him. "I insist." Gordon said then he turns to the waitress. "Thank you, sweetie." He said to her and hands the money to her.

She walks away and Gordon raises his shot glass. "Another one bites the dust." He said. "That's right." Dean said and both he and Gordon drink a toast but Sam and I just sit back. I can't help but feel that something is off here but I'm not sure what it is.

"Dean." Gordon said before he laughs. "You gave that big-ass fang one hell of a haircut, my friend." He said. "Thank you." Dean said. "That was beautiful. Absolutely beautiful." Gordon compliments. "Yep." Dean said then he looks over at me and Sam. "(Y/n)? Sammy? You two all right?" He asked. "I'm fine." Sam and I replied, flatly.

"Well, lighten up a little, you two. Just celebrating a little. Job well done." Gordon said. "Right. Well, decapitations aren't my idea of a good time, I guess." Sam said and I nod. "Yeah, same here." I replied. "Oh, come one, it's not like it was human. You've gotta have a little more fun with your job." Gordon said and Dean nods and points at him. "See? That's what I've been trying to tell him." Dean said as he gestures towards Sam. "Sometimes (y/n) gets it. You guys could learn a thing or two from this guy." Dean said as he looks at us.

"Yeah I bet we could." I growled at Dean and Sam sighs. "Look, we're not gonna bring you guys down. (Y/n) and I are just gonna go back to the motel." Sam said as we start to stand up.

"You sure?" Dean asked us. "Yeah." We said and we start to walk away. "Guys? Remind me to beat that buzzkill out of you two later, all right?" Dean said and he tosses Sam the keys.

Sam and I return to the motel room and Sam drops the keys on a hook. While he does that, I pull out my phone and start to dial a number. "Harvelle's Roadhouse." Ellen's voice replied as I put the phone on speaker so Sam could here. "Hey, Ellen, (y/n) (l/n) and Sam Winchester. " I said "(y/n), Sam, it's good to hear from you. You three okay, aren't you?" Ellen asked.

"Yeah. Yeah, everything's fine. Got a question." I said to her. "Yeah, shoot." She said. "You ever run across a guy named Gordon Walker?" I asked her. "Yeah, I know Gordon." Ellen said and Sam and I share a look.

"And?" Sam asked. "Well, he's a real good hunter. Why are you asking?" Ellen said, curiously. "Well, we ran into him on a job and we're kinda working with him, I guess." Sam said to him. "Don't do that, guys." Ellen said, quickly, and I look at the phone.

"I - I thought you said he was a good hunter." I said, questioning. "Yeah, and Hannibal Lecter's a good psychiatrist. Look, he is dangerous to everyone and everything around him. If he's working on a job you three just let him handle it and you move on." Ellen said.

"Ellen -" 

"No, Sam and (y/n)? You -- just listen to what I'm telling you, okay?" She said to us. "Right, okay." We said and we listen to what she had to say about Gordon

After talking with Ellen and getting the information about Gordon, Sam and I head over to the ending marching and start to buy a soda. We start to head back to the room but I pause and look around. "(Y/n)?" Sam asked me and I look around, cautiously. "Could've sworn..." I muttered as I scan the parking lot then turn back to Sam. "Never mind." I said and we head to the room and open the door.

We get inside and lean against the door, relieved. Suddenly someone jumps on Sam from behind. He knocks the attacker down, then the second come but I go and fight the second attacker.

I heard a crash then a thump and I look over to see Sam knocked out on the floor. "Sam!" I called out but the second attacker punches me across the face and knocks me out.

I groan, slightly, as I start to wake up, only to find out that there was a bag over my hand and a gag over my mouth. I nudge to my side and realized someone was next to me, which I figured was Sam. We were also moving so we were captured an taking somewhere and I don't know how long I've been out.

Eventually, the car turns and continues on for a few more minutes before it slows down and stops. I hear a couple of doors open then close before the doors next to me opens and I was dragged out. 

Moments later, I was bound to a chair then the bag was pulled off. I blink and look to my right to see Sam next to me, also tied up to the chair. He looks at me and I give him a look of relief then I turn my head and my eyes widen as I see the bartender, from earlier, standing before us.

He shows a lot of fangs and advances on us, and we began to struggle. As the vampire advances on us, a woman appears in the doorway. "Wait! Step back, Eli." She orders. Eli pulls back, his fangs retracting. The woman walks over and pulls off mine and Sam's gag.

"My name's Lenore. I'm not going to hurt you two. We just need to talk." She said. "Talk? Yeah, okay, but we might have a tough time paying attention too much besides Eli's teeth." Sam spat as he and I look over at Eli. "He won't hurt you either. You have my word." Lenore said.

"Your word? Oh yeah, great, thanks." I said with a sarcastic laugh. "Listen lady, no offense but you're not the first vampire we've met." I said to her. "We're not like the others. We don't kill humans, and we don't drink their blood. We haven't for a long time." Lenore informed us and I scoff at this.

"What is this, some kind of joke?" Sam asked. "Notice you and your friend are still alive." She pointed out. "Okay, uh, correct me if I'm wrong here, but shouldn't you be starving to death?" I asked her. "We've found other ways. Cattle blood." She said and I raise an eyebrow at this.

"You're telling us you're responsible for all the --"

"It's not ideal, in fact it's disgusting. But -- it allows us to get by." Lenore said, talling over Sam. "Okay, uh, why?" Sam asked her. "Survival. No deaths, no missing locals, no reason for people like you to come looking for people like us. We blend in. Our kind is practically extinct. Turns out we weren't quite as high up the food chain as we imagined." Lenore said.

"Why are we explaining ourselves to these killers?" Eli asked her, annoyed. "Eli!" Lenore exclaims, firmly. "We choke on cow's blood so that none of them suffer. Tonight they murdered Conrad and they celebrated." Eli growled. "Eli, that's enough." Lenore said to him. "Yeah, Eli, that's enough." I repeated and Eli glares at me. "What's done is done. We're leaving this town tonight." Lenore said.

"Then why did you bring us here? Why are you even talking to us?" I asked her. "Believe me, I'd rather not. But I know your kind. Once you have the scent you'll keep tracking us. It doesn't matter where we go. Hunters will find us." She said. "So you're asking us not to follow you." Sam said to her. "We have a right to live. We're not hurting anyone." Lenore said.

"Right, so you keep saying, but give us one good reason why we should believe you." I said to her. "Fine." She said then she gets in my face. "You know what I'm going to do? I'm going to let you two go." She said and I give her a started look. Then she stands up and turns to Eli. "Take them back. Not a mark on either of them." She said then the put the bags back over our heads. 

We were then lead out of the building and pushed us into the car. Once inside, I hear the door closing then the car starting and we start to move.

About half an hour or an hour later, the vampires dropped us back off at the hotel. They removed mine and Sam's bag off of our head and untied us. Eli stares at us for a moment then he gets back in his car and they take off.

Sam and I exchange a look, a silent conversation between us, before we head back towards the hotel room. Sam opens the door and I enter and see Dean and Gordon in the living room area.

They turn to look at me just as Sam comes in and closes the door. "Where you two been?" Dean asked us. I look over at Gordon, who gave me a suspicious look. "Can we talk to you alone, Dean?" I said and we stare at each other for a moment before he turns to Gordon. "You mind chillin' out for a couple minutes?" he asked and Gordon nods.

We exit the motel room and walk into the parking lot as Sam said. "Dean, maybe we've got to rethink this hunt." Dean looks at him like he's crazy. "What are you talking about? Where were you and (y/n)?" Dean asked. "In the nest." I said and Dean's eyes widen a bit.

"You guys found it?" He asked us, shocked. "They found us, man." Sam said to him. "How'd you two get out? How many'd you guys kill?" Dean asked us. "None." I replied. "Well (y/n), they didn't just let you and Sam go." Dean said, disbelief.

"That's exactly what they did." Sam said. "All right, well, where is it?" Dean asked. "We were blindfolded, we don't know." I said, shrugging. "Well, you guys have got to know something." Dean said, exasperated.

"We went over that bridge outside of town, but Dean, listen. Maybe we shouldn't go after them." Sam said to him. "Why not?" Dean asked. "We don't think they're like other vampires. We don't think they're killing people." I said and Dean scoffs at this. "You're joking. Then how do they stay alive? Or undead, or whatever the hell they are." He said, confused. "The cattle mutilations. They said they live off of animal blood." Sam said.

"And you believed them?" Dean asked and I held my arms out to them. "Look at us, Dean. They let Sam and I go without a scratch." I said. "Wait, so you're saying..." Dean said then he looks between us then shakes his head. "No, man, no way. I don't know why they let you two go. I don't really care. We find 'em, we waste 'em." He said.

"Why?" Sam asked. "What part of vampires don't you understand, Sam? If it's supernatural, we kill it, end of story. That's our job." Dean said, firmly. "No, Dean, that is not our job. Our job is hunting evil. And if these things aren't killing people, they're not evil!" I shout at him. "Of course they're killing people, that's what they do. They're all the same, (y/n). They're not human, okay? We have to exterminate every last one of them. You know it as well as I do." Dean said to me.

"No, Dean, I don't think so, all right? Not this time." I said. "Gordon's been on those vamps for a year, he knows." Dean said. "Gordon?" Sam and I said, questioning. "Yes." Dean said.

"You're taking his word for it?" Sam asked. "That's right." Dean said. "Ellen says he's bad news." Sam said and Dean looks between us. "You guys called Ellen?" He asked and we nod at him. "And I'm supposed to listen to her? We barely know her, guys, no thanks, I'll go with Gordon." Dean said and he starts to turn around. "Right, 'cause Gordon's such an old friend." Sam grumbles and Dean turns back to us.

"You don't think I can see what this is?" I said and Dean looks at me, his eyes narrowed. "What are you talking about?" He asked me. "He's a substitute for John, isn't he? A poor one." I said and he glares at me. "Shut up, (y/n)." He growls while I could see out of the corner of my eye, Sam giving me a nervous look. "He's not even close, Dean. Not on his best day." I sneered.

"You know what? I'm not even going to talk about this." Dean said. "You know, you slap on this big fake smile but I can see right through it. Because I know how you feel, Dean. John's dead. And he left a hole, and it hurts so bad you can't take it, but you can't just fill up that hole with whoever you want to. It's an insult to his memory." I said and Dean glares at me. "Okay." Dean mutters and he turns away then I noticed his fist clenching but he seemed to be thinking things over.

"You know what, Dean, if you want...you can hit me. I can take it, I'm a big girl. Hell, you can hit Sam if you don't want to hit me. It won't change anything." I said, firmly, then he looks over his shoulder at me before he turns to face me. "I'm going to that nest. You and Sam don't want to tell me where it is, fine. I'll find it myself." He said and he starts to walk away.

"Dean?" Sam calls out and we go after him towards the hotel.

We return to the motel room, only to see that Gordon is gone. "Gordon?" Dean called out but no answer. "You think he went after them?" Sam asked. "Probably." Dean said. "Dean, we have to stop him." I said. "Really, (y/n)? Because I say we lend a hand." Dean said. "Just give us the benefit of the doubt, would you? You owe us that." Sam said.

"Yeah, we'll see. I'll drive. Give me the keys." Dean said to him and Sam points to the table where he'd set them earlier. But they were gone. "He snaked the keys." Sam said and Dean sighs.

"I can't believe this. I just fixed her up, too." Dean grumbles as he hotwires the car then it starts up. "So the bridge, is that, uh, is that all you got?" Dean asked Sam. "The bridge was four and a half minutes from their farm." Sam replied.

"How do you know?" I asked Sam. "I counted." He replied and I give a small smirk at this. He then starts tracing a path on the map in his lap. "They took a left out of the farm, then turned right onto a dirt road, followed that for two minutes slightly up a hill, then took another quick right and we hit the bridge." Sam said and Dean looks up at him.

"You're good. You're a monster pain in the ass, but you're good." Dean said then he looks up at me through his rearview mirror. "Same goes to you, princess." He said and I roll my eyes. "Jackass." I grumbled. "Weirdo." He remarks back and I stare back at him through the mirror and give a slight smirk before we take off.

We finally come up to the house and burst through the door. Inside, we see Lenore tied up to a chair, she was covered in cuts and she was pale and sickly looking. Gordon was standing next to her, holding up a blade, covered up with Dead Man's blood I presume.

He had just sliced the blade across her chest just as we come in and he looks up at us. "Sam, Dean, (y/n). Come on in." Gordon greeted.

"Hey, Gordon. What's going on?" Dean asked as he stares at the scene before him. "Just poisoning Lenore here with some dead man's blood. She's going to tell us where all her little friends are, aren't you?" Gordon said as he looks at Lenore, who looked beyond terrified. Then Gordon looks up at Dean. "Wanna help?" He asked.

"Look, man --" Dean started to say but Gordon talks over him. "Grab a knife. I was just about to start in on the fingers." He said and he drags the knife across her arm; veins trace away from the cut and this started to make my blood boil.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey, let's all just chill out, huh?" Dean said to him. "I'm completely chill." Gordon said, calmly. "Gordon, put the knife down." Sam ordered and he steps towards Gordon, but Dean stops him with a hand on his chest. "Sounds like it's Sam here needs to chill." Gordon said.

"Just step away from her, all right?" I said as I take a step forward. "(Y/n)." Dean said to me, warningly, but Gordon stares at me a bit. "You're right. I'm wasting my time here. This bitch will never talk. Might as well put her out of her misery." He said and he pulls out a larger knife. "I just sharpened it, so it's completely humane." He said.

Then he turns towards Lenore but Sam and I step up to block him. "Gordon, we're letting her go." Sam said, firmly. Then Gordon points the knife at Sam's chest, stopping him. "You two are not doing a damn thing." Gordon growls as I glare at him.

"Hey, hey, hey, Gordon, let's talk about this." Dean said, trying to calm the situation down. "What's there to talk about? It's like I said, Dean. No shades of gray." Gordon said to him. "Yeah. I hear ya. And I know how you feel." Dean said to him.

"Do you?" Gordon asked. "That vampire that killed your sister deserved to die, but this one..." Dean started to say then Gordon laughs. "Killed my sister? That filthy fang didn't kill my sister. It turned her. It made her one of them. So I hunted her down, and I killed her myself." He said and we stand there in shocked silence.

"You did what?" Dean said, obviously shocked at this revelation. "It wasn't my sister anymore, it wasn't human. I didn't blink. And neither would you." He said and I gasped. "So you knew all along, then? You knew about the vampires, you knew they weren't killing anyone. You knew about the cattle. And you just didn't care." I shouted at him, angrily.

"Care about what? A nest of vampires suddenly acting nice? Taking a little time out from sucking innocent people? And we're supposed to buy that? Trust me. Doesn't change what they are. And I can prove it." Gordon said then he grabs my arm, slices the knife across it which made me let out a pained groan, then lays the knife against my throat, dragging me towards Lenore.

Dean pulls his gun just as Sam starts to do the same. "Let her go. Now!" Dean growls. "Relax. If I wanted to kill her, she'd already be on the floor. Just making a little point." Gordon said and he holds the cut on my arm over Lenore, so the blood drips on her face. She hisses and her fangs began to extend.

"Hey!" Sam and Dean exclaim and Gordon turns to them. "You think she's so different? Still want to save her? Look at her. They're all the same. Evil, bloodthirsty." He said but then Lenore starts to control herself, retracting her fangs, and turns her face away. "No. No." She whispers, breathless, and I look over at Gordon. "You hear her, Gordon?" I said either a floating smile.

"No! No!" Lenore shout then I push the knife away from my throat, and push Gordon away then Sam comes up to me and pushes me behind him and Dean as they advance on Gordon. "We're done here." Sam said.

"Sam, get her out of here." Dean orders. "Yeah." Sam said and he puts away his gun then he picks Lenore up in his arms. Gordon takes a step towards him, but Dean still has the gun trained on him. "Uh-uh. Uh-uh!" Dean said, warningly, to Gordon just as Sam takes Lenore out.

"Gordon, I think you and I've got some things to talk about." Dean said  as he starts to walk towards Gordon. "Get out of my way." Gordon threatened him. "Sorry." Dean said as I go to pull my gun out. "You're not serious." Gordon said, exasperated. "I'm having a hard time believing it too, but I know what I saw. If you want those vampires, you gotta go through me." Dean said and I step forward with my gun raised. "And me." I said.

Gordon nods then he looks at his knife, then jams it into the table. "Fine." He said and Dean and I look at the knife then Dean looks at his gun. He pulls the clip out of the gun and sets it aside but I just lower my gun. But then Gordon knocks the gun out of my hand then punched me across the face.

"(Y/n)!" I hear Dean yells as I fall to the ground. I shake my head and look over to see Gordon and Dean fighting. "What are you doing, man? You doing this for a fang? Come on, Dean, we're on the same side here." Gordon said as I run my hand over my nose. "I don't think so, you sadistic bastard." Dean said then Gordon throws Dean across the room.

"You're not like your brother or your girl there. You're a killer. Like me." Gordon said as I get up and run towards him and jump on his back. I wrapped a arm around his neck, he grabs my arm then walks backward and slammed me against the wall. I yelped in pain as he grabs the back of my collar, throws me over him and I flip over and land on my back, knocking the wind out of me.

Then Dean goes over to Gordon and kicks him down. Then he hauls him up against the wall, and elbows him in the face, knocking him out. Pinning him under his elbow, he slams Gordon's head into another wall. "Oh, sorry." Dean mutters as I start to get up. "(Y/n), you okay?" Dean asked me as he comes over to me.

"Yeah...my back might be sore in the morning but....I'll live." I said as I get up but Dean helps me up. Once I get to my feet, I look up at Dean and the two of us stare into each other's eyes for a few seconds then I look down. "Thanks." I said and he nods at me before we look over at Gordon's unconscious body.

Later, as the sun was rising, we had set Gordon in a chair and we tied him up while he woke up. "You know, I might be like you, and I might not. But you're the one tied up right now." Dean said to Gordon, who glared at the two of us.

Sam returns and sees the scene before him while Dean was pacing. Gordon and Dean watch each other and Sam looks over at me. "Did I miss anything?" He asked me. "Nah, not much." I said then Dean looks over at Sam. "Lenore get out okay?" He asked. "Yeah. All of 'em did." Sam said as he glares at Gordon.

"Then I guess our work here is done. How you doin', Gordy? Gotta tinkle yet?" Dean asked him and Gordon looks at him. "All right. Well, get comfy. We'll call someone in two or three days, have them come out, untie you." Dean said then he jams Gordon's knife into a table behind him.

"Ready to go, Dean?" I asked him. "Not yet. I guess this is goodbye. Well, it's been real." Dean said then he hits Gordon, knocking him in his chair to the floor. Sam clears his throat. "Okay. I'm good now. We can go." Dean said and we walk out of the building.

As we exit the farmhouse, the three of us wince at pur recent injuries - Sam's left arm is wrapped in a bandage. Dean stops, setting himself on his feet like a boxer. "Guys? Clock me one." Dean said and we turn to him. "What?" We asked.

"Come on. I won't even hit either of you back. Let's go." Dean said as he gestures to his face. "No." Sam said and I shake my head. "Let's go, you guys get a freebie. Hit me, come on." Dean said and I shake my head. "You look like you just went twelve rounds with a block of cement, Dean. I'll take a raincheck." I said and Sam nods in agreement. "Same here." He said and Dean sighs.

"I wish we never took this job. It's jacked everything up." He said, sadly. "What do you mean?" Sam asked. "Think about all the hunts we went on, Sammy, our whole lives." Dean said. "Okay." Sam said.

"What if we killed things that didn't deserve killing? You know? I mean, the way Dad raised us..." Dean said. "Dean, after what happened to Mary, John did the best he could." I said to him. "I know he did. But the man wasn't perfect. And the way he raised us, to hate those things; and man, I hate 'em. I do. When I killed that vampire at the mill, I didn't even think about it; hell, I even enjoyed it." Dean said.

"You didn't kill Lenore." Sam said to him. "No, but every instinct told me to. I was gonna kill her. I was gonna kill 'em all." Dean said. "Yeah, Dean, but you didn't. And that's what matters." I said to him. "Yeah. Well, 'cause you and Sam are pains in my ass." Dean said and Sam and I smile. "Guess we might have to stick around to be a pain in the ass, then." Sam said and I nod.

"Thanks." Dean said to us. "Don't mention it." Sam and I said and Sam gets in the passenger's side and I get into the backseat. Dean stood outside for a moment then he climbs in the car, starts it and we drive away.

#fandom #fanfic #fan fiction #reader insert #x reader #supernatural #dean winchester #dean winchester x you #dean x you #supernatural dean #dean winchester x female!reader #dean winchester imagine #dean x reader #dean winchester x reader #supernatural fanfic series #supernatural fandom #supernatural fanfiction #tv series #tv show fandom #tv shows #fantasy

[queermania]

Dean does say at one point that it's pointless for Sam to try to keep in touch with his Stanford friends, and eventually calls Dean "anti-social"... which Dean doesn't really argue with:

SAM: I’ve been listenin’, I’m just busy. (He is checking e-mails on his PalmPilot.)

DEAN: Busy doin’ what?

SAM: Reading e-mails. (DEAN gets out of the car and starts to fill the tank with gas.)

DEAN: E-mails from who?

SAM: From my friends at Stanford.

DEAN: You’re kidding. You still keep in touch with your college buddies?

SAM: Why not?

DEAN: Well, what exactly do you tell ‘em? You know, about where you’ve been, what you’ve been doin’?

SAM: I tell ‘em I’m on a road trip with my big brother. I tell ‘em I needed some time off after Jess.

DEAN: Oh, so you lie to ‘em.

SAM: No. I just don’t tell ‘em….everything.

SAM: So, what am I supposed to do, just cut everybody out of my life? (DEAN shrugs.) You’re serious?

DEAN: Yeah, that’s called lying. I mean, hey, man, I get it, tellin’ the truth is far worse.

DEAN: Look, it sucks, but in a job like this, you can’t get close to people, period.

SAM: You’re kind of anti-social, you know that?

DEAN: Yeah, whatever. (SAM continues to read his e-mails.)

Honestly, Dean doesn't strike me as particularly willing to make friendship connections with others unless there is an externally motivating factor.

Benny helped Dean get out of Purgatory. Gordon was a Hunter who was going after the same monster in town as Sam and Dean were, and Castiel was a representative of Heaven first and foremost at his introduction. Dean tried to send Jo Harvelle home rather than let her work a case with them. (And Ellen scolds him because he never told her that he was back from the dead)

I don't think Dean makes connections all that readily with others, unless he's trying to get something out of the other person. He's charming and good at pretending, but ultimately he's focus is usually on the task at hand.

dean: it's kind of pointless to try to maintain a relationship with people you can only ever lie to sam: you're antisocial fandom: this is conclusive evidence

but seriously. does sam end up maintaining a relationship with any of those people? i'm pretty sure the answer is no. and who does he make friendship connections with when there's not an external motivating factor? ruby? nope. jo and ellen? again, no. at least not anymore so than dean does. charlie? nope. dean is the only one who spends time doing non-hunting activities with her in canon. amelia? okay plus one! jody? nope that's just hunting. donna? nope dean is the only one who spends time with her outside of hunting in canon. crowley? nope. cas? nope, again, that's dean's friend. rowena? i would say rowena counts but under your definition, she doesn't. eileen is fifty-fifty because he does spend non-hunting time with her but he only got to know her because of hunting. even the AW hunters are functional, not personal.

so what are we basing all of this on? vibes? just this one conversation in season one where sam says something and dean doesn't dispute it?

tbh i think the entire argument is weak in and of itself. benny is the only one you named who even fits your parameters in my opinion. like, yeah sure dean only met gordon because they were working the same case but i don't think his behavior suggests he's only having a drink with him as a work obligation. his behavior suggests he's excited to have a drink with him because he can be honest and actually connect with him. i'm not really sure why trying to send jo home from a hunt she wasn't invited on and as far as he knows isn't equipped to handle is evidence of dean being antisocial but i guess we'll have to agree to disagree on that one. and the mere fact that dean formed a bond with cas kind of disproves your argument. he did that in spite of cas's ties to heaven, not because of them.

i just... i don't even know how to have this argument because it's so fundamentally flawed. there is evidence spilling out across fifteen seasons that dean enjoys making and maintaining personal connections: lee, the entirety of lebanon, sonny, cassie, lisa (before the s6 of it all at least), that bartender he winked at that he clearly knows, etc. but you've taken something sam said (dean is antisocial) and then used that lens to interpret every relationship he has, instead of looking at every relationship he has and interpreting what that says about him.

#replies #anonymous #dw #sw

[stellaluna33]

I was asked if I think Rory was really still "in love" with Jess in Season 6 and AYITL, and, well... My answer is a bit... It's complicated. Haha! Do I think she was still actively, consciously IN love with him then? Well, to that particular question I have to say No. But I honestly don't think that's the right question here. I don't think it matters in the long run. Do I think she's completely OVER him and could never be in love with him again? The answer to that is ALSO No. This got a little long, so forgive me!

Is Rory still attracted to Jess? Yes, I think so. Do they still have a deep, intuitive connection? It seems obvious that YES, they do. Milo has said (and I agree) that once you've had as deep of a connection as Rory and Jess had, you never really lose that, and they will always love each other on SOME level. And I absolutely believe that Rory still does, and always will, love Jess in that sense. He's a person that's very important to her and for whom she cares deeply. But that's different, of course, from being IN Love with someone.

The thing is, though, that human relationships and emotions are very changeable and subject to circumstance. While acknowledging that my experiences won't be universal, I think for a lot of people who aren't aroace, the tipping point between platonic and romantic in friendships with people you find attractive can sometimes be a finer line than you might think. (I say SOMETIMES, because I do not quite agree with Harry Burns on this!) I am a woman who is attracted to men, and I've had some friendships with men without feeling anything more than platonic attraction, and I've had other friendships that, well... felt like they could probably go either way, if the circumstances were different. I have to be more careful with those friendships and make the decision not to dwell on feelings of attraction or put myself in situations with too much emotional intimacy, because which side of the line we're on is largely circumstantial. We CHOOSE not to think of each other as romantic prospects. (In the same way that I CHOSE to commit to my husband and continue to make that choice every day.) And that? That is the kind of "friendship" Rory and Jess have. They treat each other as friends because they have made the decision to treat each other as friends, because they currently (as of the Revival) believe that to be for the best and/or to respect the other person's perceived wishes. This is easier because they haven't been spending a lot of time together (perhaps even intentionally). Physical and emotional distance makes it easier to maintain emotional boundaries. If they were in a situation that had them spending a lot more time together, though? (Say, if they had "a work thing" between them...) I absolutely believe they might be teetering on the edge of that fence again. All it would take is a push in the right direction. As for personal differences between them, Rory has always been very good at compartmentalizing her feelings and not dwelling on them. Jess, however, is much less so. He dwells. (OHHHH, he dwells!) That's just their personalities. But I honestly think Jess had probably been attempting to move on too (I have real life friends who were in this situation, now married, but I'll talk about that another time.)

Now how does Logan fit into this? Well, in Season 6, it was complicated. Rory was officially Logan's girlfriend, and her allegiance (however shaky) tends to be to her official boyfriend (she couldn't bring herself to break up with Dean either). Her attraction to Jess was still pretty obvious, however (Logan definitely picked up on it), and that one encounter resulted in Rory and Logan separating (or breaking up, depending on who you asked or when...). 6.18 is more complicated, but my opinion is NOT that Rory went to Philly to intentionally "use" Jess. She SAID she "just wanted to see [his] place, but then... this." That doesn't sound like a plan to me. I think she found herself teetering on the edge of that attraction that's ALWAYS there between them, thought, "And why shouldn't I give in? Logan certainly would..." but then couldn't go through with it. Because yeah, she COULD fall in love with Jess again if she let herself, but she WAS still in love with Logan already, even though she didn't want to be anymore. She was still in a committed relationship with Logan, and it was a sexual one. It's not really popular right now to talk about the bonding aspects of sex (oxytocin release, etc.), but it is legitimately a thing for some people. Some people cannot separate the physical act of sex from emotional attachment, and the show had established that Rory was one of those people. She could not (in college at least) do "casual," and she'd been having sex with him for over a year.

The affair in AYITL is something else again. Because while I've said that Rory wasn't "in love" (yet?) with Jess in the Revival, I actually don't think she was really still in love with Logan either. Alexis Bledel herself said that she thought Rory was just "going through the motions" and clinging to something familiar and comfortable, and I agree. And this is (unfortunately) in character for Rory. Her life was spinning out of control (her grandfather dying, her career uncertain) and she was clinging to the emotional familiarity of Logan, the same way she clung to Dean when her life was in upheaval in Season 4, and she didn't do that because she was "still in love with Dean" (even though she convinced herself she was. She had to). Rory (for the first time maybe ever?!) was the one to end things with Logan in the Revival. I do think she'll probably always love him a little, in the same way she'll always love Jess a little (that kind of Love is ever-expanding), but she wasn't IN Love with him anymore and... It just wasn't right, and she knew it. Their goodbye was bittersweet, but she didn't seem heartbroken, she seemed at PEACE with letting go of him and ready to move on with her life. Love can be overpowering, it's true, but... It also has so much more to do with circumstance and personal choice than we sometimes want to admit. So, yeah. No, Rory and Jess aren't "in love" in AYITL. But in my 30+ years of life experience, that doesn't really mean a dang thing.

#Gilmore Girls #AYITL #Literati #Love #Look. Human emotions and relationships are incredibly complex and malleable. #There are no simple answers here. #I guess that's the Short Version. #😂

[shallowseeker]

I don't view Sam's responses as "canned." He's consistently shown to be gentle and empathetic.

And you're welcome to argue that.

In my opinion, it just doesn't come as easily to Sam. That he doesn't instinctually connect doesn't mean he doesn't want to. In fact, he tries really hard to checklist the heart-to-heart stuff and "do it right."

Dean navigates emotional conversations by feel, and oddly enough, so does Cas. But Sam? Sam dissociates. He intellectualizes. He approaches emotional difficulties from a safe distance and treats the situation like a puzzle that either needs solving or simply needs to be moved past.

I think this is actually why Sam communicates differently with Eileen Leahy. He talks in a whisper, and more instinctually with his body. He doesn't therapize and wordify his responses as heavily with her, because he has to slow down, so it comes off as more genuine.

And with Rowena, it's a more of "Rowena skips the bullshit." Plus, Rowena copes by "taking control" in minute ways (Rowena: magic, self-help, lore & Sam: lore, food, exercise, etc.) They're the same kind of soul with a similar kind of coping.

///

Anyway, I think Sam's style of connection to Jack and Claire seems, in my opinion, careful and rehearsed-sounding. He has a distinct "therapy" voice, and sometimes that works well to defuse a situation (like Magda)...and sometimes it doesn't. (Different people respond differently to different approaches in different situations, after all! There is no exact template you can stick to all the time.)

///

Anyway, sometimes even Dean lapses into assuming that because Sam has all the academic words, he's somehow "better" at "the talky stuff," but it is, in fact, Dean that is feeling out Jody Mill's distress in 11x12:

Dean SAYS Sam is better at the "talky" stuff, but in my opinion, it's Dean who is the natural. (He and Cas are both a little...sterner and boundary-driven, but they also acknowledge the reality of a situation and admit when someone is right, as we'll see with Claire below.)

///

Claire n' Sam in 11x12:

Claire does come around to Sam; realizes he knows what he's talking about, but they have to work at it much harder to get there. (And then when Sam flips from psychoanalysis to parental authority in 12x16, she flips her shit on him.)

///

Vs Claire n' Dean in 11x12:

He talks down on her level. He keeps it real. He tells her, "And you were right."

///

And later, it's Dean who Claire checks in with:

x - x - x - x - x - x - x - x

#for a not-sam focused blog you sure do make me talk a lot about sam #spn parenting #asks #sam stuff #sam + therapy talk #dean + emotions #tfw + relating #sam + social cues #sam + checklisting emotions #jack & sam #claire & sam #claire & dean #dean & jody

[fandom-hoarder]

happy momfucker Monday! Thoughts on deanmary? If so how do you think Sam would react to them?

Happy Momfucker Monday!

Thoughts on DeanMary:

Hahhh ok, actually it's deeper than that for me. There's always going to be a layer to DeanMary that involves John in some way. Be that the memory of him, or his relationship to Dean and how their relationships to Mary affected Dean's upbringing and self image (Dean as Mary's replacement; Dean as the keeper and protector of the Myth of Mary), or the parts of John that Mary sees in Dean, or Dean's fantasy/wish fulfillment around possessing a whole and happy family.

But also, s12+ DeanMary can be about healing. But only after they fuck through all that messy baggage. 👀

So if Sam found out, I think his initial reaction would be jealousy that presents outwardly as enraged concern for Mary's consent/autonomy at first. --Oh, Amara brought Mary back for Dean, huh? Does Mary get a say in this?--

--And he has to lash out at Dean because it can't be Mary's fault; it can't be her preferring Dean over him in everything-- everything... He can't blame her because he's never been able to blame her-- he's barely ever been able to talk about her, and even now that she's here she might as well not be; it's like she's not real; but it's-- not her fault-- and he can't ever say a word against her--

But really--- Dean and Mary having this is another relationship in his family he's shut out of -- and with s12 Mary, in particular, she hasn't given him anything near to this. And it's not that he would want that -- except maybe he does. Maybe he craves any kind of gentleness from her; any kind of affection; any attention; connection.

But also, her being here takes Dean's attention away. And Dean can say there's nothing and no one he'd put in front of Sam, but then why does Sam have to find out about Dean's meetups with mom when he accidentally sees a text message preview on Dean's phone?

Sure, he'd had his suspicions, but until he'd seen it he'd been able to pretend. God, he shouldn't be jealous of his mother, but--

Why does he find out about the rest of it by stealing a car from the bunker and tracking them down, only to drive up on the Impala parked down some dark, nameless road two towns over -- Dean balls deep inside Mary in the backseat; Mary writhing in his lap as Dean praises, "That's my girl, just like that," in a drawl so close to John's it makes Sam's heart lurch?

Why does Mary cling to Dean like that-- Like she has the right to-- like Sam is the one in the wrong here? Like he's breaking her heart.

** Now, if I have my way about it, Sam's jealousy ends with a messy threesome and a smidge of actual fucking communication. If I have my way, it's the full house of wincest up in here. ☺️😤

But maybe it still takes awhile to get there. Maybe Sam leaves when Mary insists Dean isn't taking advantage of her -- tells him he doesn't understand--

Leaves the dark road. Leaves the bunker. Goes radio silent for days (weeks). Turns off his phone and tries to evade Dean, but turns it back on when it works too well, suspicious his messages will be empty anyway-- they're not.

"C'mon, Sammy, don't do this," --and Sam wants to throw his phone across the room and smash it to pieces-- as if he's the one-- "Don't tell me I got her back just to lose you. That's not a fair trade."

And maybe Sam doesn't want to stay away anymore. Maybe Mary texts him I'm sorry. Can we talk? and he can't help the way he easily forgives her -- the way he folds into her arms between her and Dean and hopes, heart aching, that he's a necessary part of the whole.

#asks #momfucker monday #deanmary #wincest #samdeanmary #the full house of wincest #sorry this took me all day to type lmao but im glad you sent it early so i could draft between irl tasks <3 #🍋 #me.txt

[paellegere]

final thoughts: supernatural season 6

what an interesting season. i think what i'm most surprised about is how strikingly different this season is compared to its predecessors. maybe i only picked up on it because i knew in advance that the showrunner shifted from kripke to gamble, but i still think it's fascinating to see how much can change just be putting someone new in charge.

i don't remember how i felt about season 6 the first time i watched it, but rewatching it now it definitely feels like "the beginning of the end" to me. like it's clear that it's all downhill from here, now that the original concept and plot has run its course. i wouldn't really say it's bad, but it lacked the cohesion and direction that the original 5 seasons had.

my main critique is probably that it felt like it jumped all over the place. it felt like there were three small plots shoved into one season, rather than being one overarching plot with smaller arcs. the eve thing in particular disappoints me, since she was only around for a few episodes before she got got. it calls into question her authority and power and makes her seem like not as big a deal as they said she was. mother of all monsters? yeah, nbd. got her in one try. i would have liked to see more failures or consequences on sam and dean's part as they tried to take her down—maybe even make her the season 6 big bad and then focus on cas's bullshit in season 7. idk, i think it could have been handled a lot better, but as it stands eve doesn't really stand out to me as being a monster more threatening than, say, a vampire. hell, a vampire posed more threat to the winchesters than eve, since dean actually got turned by one and suffered the consequences of it.

(i really liked the vampire episode. they should do more like that.)

i TRULY don't understand the whole "burning demon bones" nonsense. it's set up to be some great way to gank a demon, as if they don't have a demon-killing knife AND exorcism spells. i tried to rationalize it at first as like "well this way they don't have to be near the demon" which should work for lesser demons who can't teleport—but hello? crowley can. and he does. "oh but he was in the devil's trap" then use the demon-killing knife? throw it at him. idk it just seemed like a very weird thing to introduce, and the pomp and circumstance it got really seemed overblown compared to what it actually is: another mundane option for killing demons to put in their arsenal.

i think they could have stood to put a little more foreshadowing in the early episodes of this season, too. when cas started getting shady all of a sudden it felt more like an about-face than a revelation, so i would have preferred more puzzle pieces be presented from the start.

i DO really like how they develop the soul in this season, and what their philosophy about souls is. the idea that "caring" is the primary function of the soul. like sympathy, empathy, desire, worry—all the emotions that connect you to another person, basically. that's an interesting way to play the idea of a soul, and i mostly like how it was executed. i was expecting "soullessness" to be more demonic in nature, so i like that the show makes a poignant distinction between "corrupted soul" and "no soul." my major critique here is regarding sam's lust for women, which seems extremely contradictory to the established worldbuilding. like having a sex drive independent of emotion is fine, but there are many moments in the season where sam checks out women or watches them appraisingly, which indicates some level of desire—and why would a guy with no soul care about sexual attraction? doesn't make a lot of sense. this is where i really think the writers muddied the distinction between demonic and soulless, and i couldn't help but roll my eyes every time they whipped out another one of those moments.

oh and i liked all of the crowley/bobby interactions. few and far between, but god they did a great job with it. i like their parallels (why do they have the same favorite curse. that's so unnecessarily homoerotic), and the tension between them is the exact type i like in my ships. there's a maturity and age to them which gives their interactions a nice spice and flavor, so i hope there are more moments like these in season 7 too.

overall though i think the season was pretty lackluster. it makes sense in a lot of ways since they're scrambling to find a plot after the original story finished, and it's definitely a transitional season. but i realize now that there's a very big reason why i remember so much of the first 5 seasons and so little of anything past that. but i believe that's the gist of my thoughts. season 7 is next! since i clearly don't know when to stop lmao

#liveblogging: supernatural #supernatural #i want to watch the north water first. i got intrigued. maybe another short series too before i get into season 7 #this damn show is LONG i have to pace myself if i ever want to watch anything else lmao #i'm thinking i'll get to s7 sometime next week though. against my better judgment i am in fact excited for it. lol #lmao even #.txt #spn reviews

[mlobsters]

supernatural s8e3 heartache (w. brad buckner, eugenie ross-leming)

another jackles directed episode. hold on to your butts.

oh boy they're in minneapolis, i lived there for 8 years? 7? *trying to calculate the year based on my oldest being 3.5 when we moved....* ok yes, 7. anyway. lake! no wait, river. wait, that's actually the minneapolis skyline. i worked downtown for a while. did you know the mississippi river goes through minneapolis? (i did not before i moved there)

cool thing about minneapolis?? skyways! enclosed walkways between buildings downtown so you don't have to go outside because it's fucking cold in the winter: The Minneapolis Skyway System is the largest contiguous system of enclosed, second-level bridges in the world—composed of 9.5 miles of pathways connecting 80 city blocks. all right. weird. getting nostalgic. MOVING ON

oh babes with the orange faces, again. i am so sorry.

SAM [slowly] Farmers' market. [He holds up the apple.] Organic. What? I had a year off. I took the time to enjoy the good things. DEAN While avoiding doing what we actually do. SAM Wow, Dean, does it make you feel that much better every time you say it? DEAN All right, man, look, I get it. You took a year off to do yoga and play the lute, whatever, but I'm back. Okay, we're back, which means that we walk and kill monsters at the same time. We'll find Kevin. But in the meantime, do we ignore stuff like this? Or are innocent people supposed to die so that you can shop for produce?

i so do not like this conflict. putting all this weird shit on sam, taking the year off from hunting and settling down because he thought dean was dead, that's fine! whatever! maybe that's in character maybe not, i dunno! but having him totally fail kevin.. maybe you could argue without dean he stops caring about anyone? but i don't think it's that deep :p (also the whole girlfriend dog situation)

so i think they wrote sam into a shitty situation. i think dean is being extra asshole-ish about it. i'm mad at everyone in this scenario

DEAN All right, case is coming together. Things are coming together, man. You and me. It is all good. [SAM doesn’t respond.] Hey. SAM What? DEAN What are you thinking about, organic tomatoes? SAM Uh, I'm not thinking about anything. DEAN I don't know about you, but this last year has given me a new perspective. SAM I hear you. Believe me. DEAN I know where I'm at my best, and that is right here, driving down crazy street next to you.

oh, dean. why'd they set you up like this. (lol also it sounds like he smacks sam's leg when he says right here *pat*)

SAM Makes sense. DEAN Yes, it does. SAM Or... maybe you don't need me. I mean, maybe you're at your best hacking and slicing your way through all the world's crap alone, not having to explain yourself to anybody. DEAN Yeah, that makes sense, seeing as I have so many other brothers I can talk to about this stuff. SAM Look, I'm not saying I'm bailing on you. I'm just saying make room for the possibility that we want different things. I mean, I want my time to count for something. DEAN So, what we do doesn't count?

what year is this, i feel like we've been down this road enough. i can come up with good justifications but i don't think again the show is doing the work to support that.

DEAN Well, this is gonna singe your axons.

what?

pretty!

SAM So, everybody knows about Brick's football career, obviously, but no one knows much about his personal life. Was he ever married? MRS HOLMES Just to the game. He gave it everything he had. It's a difficult life.

LOLLL she made him do the sad thinky thoughts how this parallels my life and i can never get married either if i stay married to the job ;( ;( i am so over this plotline lol

looks like we're back to the old desktop again (s8e1 for comparison)

DEAN Uh, oh, got another e-mail here, too. This one is for you. From a university. Answering questions about admissions. SAM Just something I'm looking into. An option. DEAN You're seriously talking about hanging it up? SAM I'm not talking about anything, Dean. I'm just looking at options.

my heart hurt with that one. having no privacy, including email, really sucks. i was in an abusive situation for years where my partner could read my email. that said, sam knows it's shared, he knows dean could very well see it. and well. hurts dean sam wants to leave again. so now i'm hurt by proxy while also being mad at the contrivances of the plot. bah.

DEAN Maybe she moved into Brick's room after he died. Or... DEAN looks at the bed. SAM Oh. Thanks, Dean. Now that image is permanently etched into my retinas.

did the supernatural fraternal incest subtext-bordering-on-text show just make a joke about incest

oh no. get someone better at photoshop, please, it's dick all over again 😭 (looks like we're back to the new desktop)

that's some kind of situation he got himself in

did dean need to almost get his heart ripped out for sammy to learn some lesson about his brother needing him? (nope) *insert imaginary future arguments of "well why don't you just go hunt with benny"*

SAM Dean, listen, when this is over – when we close up shop on Kevin and the tablet – I'm done. I mean that. DEAN No, you don't. SAM Dean, the year that I took off, I had something I've never had. A normal life. I mean, I got to see what that felt like. I want that. I had that. DEAN I think that's just how you feel right now.

continue to hate this lalala

um. okayyyyy

s3e10 dream a little dream of me (dean's dream of lisa)

and he's tearing up over the memory. all right. crisis of faith at the altar of dean.

HAH actually it's like that awful nonsense lisa braeden said, about how the past year was the best of her life - meanwhile dean said he was falling apart and miserable (she deserved better writing) -- except in this case, dean died (presumably) and sam moved on and it ~WAS (apparently) THE BEST YEAR OF HIS LIFE~ (he also deserves better writing)

good luck getting down here to my deep thoughts when you gotta wade past a glowing review of minneapolis minnesota first

#supernatural #spnwatch #spn 8x03 #spn 3x10 #brad buckner #eugenie ross leming #spn desktop background update #winchesters love picnic dates apparently #lisa braeden #amelia richardson #minneapolis #skyway #spnwhinge #very much veered into whinge territory #spn and no privacy

[cousticks]

Fave character and why (overall)

What type of characters do you typically enjoy? (for me i usually like dead characters because of their... idk there's just so much to work w there 😭 like so many things for interpretation/potential)

What got you into bsd

What got you into tumblr

Can you give at least one tip or advice on how to recover from a hyperfixation on something when u need to be productive?

Are you better at writing or drawing?

If you could choose, which would you be better at?

Do you like painting?

Are your friends nice?

Forgive me for the random asks. jus answer the ones you want to ty ❤️

Is it weird if I answer all of them? I think all of these are fun to answer so I'm gonna answer all of them. Tysm!!

Favorite character overall is... really difficult. I like so many different characters for so many reasons across so many different medias. Even choosing a favorite from BSD is wildly difficult. Of all characters ever, one of my favorites is Cal Trask from John Steinbeck's East of Eden (the book, not the movie, even though he is played by James Dean). East of Eden is one of my favorite books ever, and most of the incredible themes in it, all of the cycles it represents, as well as the cycles it finally breaks, are done through Cal. He struggles with being good despite a thematic predisposition to being anything but throughout his portion of the novel doomed-by-the-narrative style, until at the end the resolution is that... he doesn't have to be either, he only really has to be him. I love that book dearly and could talk about its themes for hours (and have!). As far as favorite BSD characters specifically, that's near impossible for me to say, but a rough top-group would include Kyusaku, Kouyou, Dazai but specifically mafia era, Kunikida, and Albatross. I don't have any really good reasoning for those top favorites beyond "hehe, I like them," honestly.

I usually enjoy characters that it takes a while to piece together their motivations. Morally grey. And I mean actually morally grey, not the asshole-that-does-nice-things antihero type. I like characters that make me want to think about them and piece them together and study them like bugs under a magnifying glass until they start to catch on fire. Dudes who suck but have so much potential to be more. Make me have to justify why I enjoy them in front of a board of directors. I love to be able to fill in between the lines.

A former friend group got me into BSD back in 2019 because they were all watching it and I happened to have the time and energy to. The sheer amount of media to consume & intrigue of the characters is what made me stay, though.

This is horribly embarrassing but my first stint on Tumblr ~7 or 8 years ago was sparked by learning that the Onceler fandom existed and being absolutely fascinated by it. It was already dying out by this point, so I wasn't active or anything in it, but I thought the way people interacted across blogs to make these wild stories was so fascinating. Specifically the Truffula Flu zombie arcs. I was a Camp Entre loyalist. A couple years later I accidentally deleted my blog and didn't get active on Tumblr again until a little over a year ago, though, when I wanted to start engaging with the fanbases some media I was fixating on at the time.

If I could figure out the secret for recovering from a hyperfixation in a productive way I would be a much more functional person. Sometimes I'm able to approach things with an "if you can't beat it, join it" mentality, and can come up with ways to connect my current task to whatever I'm fixating on. Here's the secret: you're allowed to be cringe with it. If you need to do the dishes and need to make it a mental competition for "oh boy I need to be less of a disaster than Dazai its fucking on" or "I need to do my math homework so Kunikida will be proud of me" or "gotta do my laundry... I gotta be dressy for my port mafia work attire..." then do it. Who cares. That doesn't work all the time, but it can work sometimes. And when it doesn't? I normally just try to clear my mind entirely by doing something that sucks so much I can't think of anything except how it sucks. For me its cardio. I hate cardio exercise. But if I go on a jog and come back I a) feel a little better and more functional because I went on a stupid exercise for my stupid mental health, b) got some of the excess fixation energy out, and c) that sucked so bad i would literally rather do Anything else i might as well be fucking productive. These are not sure-fire ways but they help me. And my most important one? You can't focus when you're stressed. Trying to force yourself to focus when you're stressed about an assignment and panicking because you can't focus will not help you, it will make the problem worse. It is okay to give yourself some grace, walk away, try to put yourself into a healthier mindset, and come back. That's another reason I like to take walks when I can't focus, even if its just a small one down the hall for a glass of water and then back. Don't force yourself. Never force yourself. You'll feel worse and more frustrated.

I'm much better at writing. I'm horrible at drawing, I just do it anyway for fun because sometimes I need to get my fixation kick out in a visual manner. Writing has always been my strong suit.

If I could choose? I think I'd still pick writing, honestly. I'm sometimes jealous of those that can make gorgeous art, but I'm happy in my world of writing because it has helped me in so many other areas of my life as well. I don't live an artists life, unfortunately, and writing has served me well.

I do like painting! I haven't in a very long time, as I don't have the time or energy much, but I used to sculpt and paint my creations. I'm not saying I was particularly good at either, but I used to, and I enjoyed it.

I didn't always have nice friends. But these days? They are. I wouldn't trade the friends I have now for the world.

#these were so fun to answer thank you so much anon #asks? answered. hotel? trivago.

[shallowrambles]

SPNWin Ficlet: Echoes in your image

Dean fucked up time; Jack comes to save him from himself and quarantine the infected world

Dean doesn't look. Can't look.

The amulet has started to bounce in place, like the confused needle of a compass.

"Dean," the newcomer says, anguished.

The bull-man amulet glows so brightly that all the rear and side mirrors glimmer, casting kaleidoscope reflections off the interior cabin and leather seats.

"Jack," Dean whispers.

Jack is solemn, like a frozen lake. "I have to take you away from here."

No.

No way.

Dean throws his best grenade: "You of all people should let me save my mom."

It's a low blow, and Jack goes silent. When Dean finally looks up, Jack is staring into the impala vents, the faint rustle of AC stirring the long, windswept fringe of his hair.

He finally says: "She's not your mom."

Dean lets off the gas, and the impala slows, like a DeLorean running out of Plutonium.

"What do you mean by that," he answers, too evenly.

Jack looks a little less timeless as he twists the top of the seatbelt in his hands--a little less beatific, a little less unfeeling god. "It's like. There's entropy, Dean. A direction. You--you can't unscramble an egg."

Dean stiffens, because he isn't simply trying to unscramble an egg, not simply trying to save his mom. It's also about-- "What about Akrida? It's not supposed to be there, in 1972. I had to give John that letter. They're a threat to all of existence. All of it. When I saw them there, I had to step in."

Jack finally snaps: "But it's not your problem, Dean."

"Oh, so you don't think the Winchesters can handle it."

"No. I know the Winchesters can't handle it. You made it so much worse by trying to handle it, don't you get it?"

Dean cuts his eyes at the kid and stews. He wants to ask, "Who died and made you God?" but that'd be another incredibly low blow.

Jack rakes his hands through his hair--another too-human gesture. "You don't understand. That is John. That is Mary. But they're not your parents. Just being here, you're influencing everything. Every stroke, every connection that you influence echoes in your image Dean."

"You're saying this, what? Isn't even real? It's just another Heavenly hologram? That I'm God here?"

Jack huffs, looking frustrated, like he's barely holding back his own anger. "No, no, and no. It's very real. That's why I've been trying to catch you."

Jack stretches out his hands and traces his fingerpads over the vents, like the cool air can help cool his head. "When you look, the universe senses it. It turns against you, to shut it all down, like a self-destruct sequence. That's Akrida. Akrida happened because you were snooping around, trying to uncover things about your parents."

His eyes slide to Dean, heavy with meaning. "The act of observing, Dean. It's powerful. This is much bigger than you...or me."

///

Jack sighs again, looking more tired than Dean's ever seen him, like this God gig is a long stream of eighty-hour work weeks.

"Maybe it's my fault. Heaven was too...open, maybe. But I-I had to come here...to save you." He stares at Dean, like he cares too much, like he's heartbroken. "The only thing we can do now is--is quarantine this dimension and let it die. Lock the Akrida inside with it."

Dean thinks of young Mary's hopeful steps to reclaim her identity, and of John's twisted, fawn-like steps towards recovery. "You--you're saying we abandon them?"

"If there were any other way--"

It's whiplash. "So you're not gonna lift a friggin' God-finger to help."

Jack groans. "Dean. I'm saying I can't. We touch down there, and we don't have any power against anything. We're at the Akrida's mercy. And if they get out? It's everything. All of existence--not just 1972. It's 2023. It's 1734. It's all of it."

"Well," Dean grumbles, staring hard at the road. "You can quarantine me, too, then."

"Dean--"

"I'm not leaving them behind, Jack. Someone's gotta fight for 'em. I have to, especially if--if I brought this down on 'em."

Jack is quiet for a solid ten minutes. He's still fiddling with the unattached seatbelt. Dean considers shoving a cassette in the tape deck and cranking up the volume. Anything to fight the crushing, disappointing silence.

Finally, Dean can't take it anymore, and he breaks it. "So, what're you still doing here?"

Jack scowls at the road ahead, seeming to draw some kind of energy from Dean's stubbornness.

"Shit," Jack whispers, grasping the seatbelt and stretching it across his lap. With an echoing click, he fastens it. "I guess...I'm going with you. I'm not gonna be a-an absent God. Even if that means I stop being God."

Dean chances a look at the kid--sees his gray-blue eyes locked on the road ahead. Something about all of this turns his stomach, like the guilt is too much to acknowledge. This is about the last thing he'd expected to happen today--another domino in what is turning out to be a cosmic-sized mistake.

As they ease into the Lawrence city limits, circa 1972, Jack murmurs: "Know what Sam would say? This is a dumb idea in a laundry list of dumb ideas."

Heh. That's actually one of Dean's lines. He slips The Who into the tape deck, and Happy Jack roars to life. "Spoken like a true Winchester."

#spnwin spec #happy jack by the who is so #spnwin

[izzyspussy]

controversial take but like. i don't like trans eddie headcanons because i feel like.

1: his entire character arc and storyline are so intrinsically wrapped up in the outside expectations of his assigned gender and sexuality as a straight man and how having the specific pressures associated with that hinder him as a developing person. i don't think him being afab makes sense in the context of his story and the character interactions, especially with his mother (and therefore also It, and therefore the entire plot, because that's how that works in this case). i simply don't think you can make him afab and still have even remotely the same fundamental storyline, and if you don't have that then you don't have that character anymore.

characters where their gender is not so inherent to their arc and/or is not quite so dependent on the specific experience of one particular gender and the socially attached sexuality don't have this problem. say izzy hands, whose gender is not that important beyond that the generalized thesis of his canon is "this is what it means to be a man". he could be any type of man and still be the same guy playing the same role in the narrative and having - generally speaking - the same dynamic with the other characters. or dean winchester, whose character does have some dependency on the gender and sexuality expectations others have for him (and that he has for himself), but in a way that is a little more nebulous and not concretely connected to the actual plot. the villains would be the same, the plot points would be the same, and even the primary on-screen character dynamics would be - again generally speaking - basically the same if he were afab. i really do not think this is true for eddie.

i think you could still have eddie if you made him a trans woman. and i even think you could make a close enough mirror of him as a cis woman (if you did it right re: the themes and why his gender is so important in the original and how that would translate, which in the cis-swaps i've seen in this fandom has not been the case - but then again cis-swaps as a general rule are not very good or well thought out lol). but i really think that in order to make him ftm you'd have to change so much about how the story goes, and if you try to keep everything the same it doesn't work narratively/mechanically speaking. things just plain would not have happened that way, and no one seems to even try to make them happen the way they would have in those different circumstances.

and because of this, most trans eddie headcanons really come off as shallow and even though i know in most cases they probably aren't they do feel transphobic to me. like... why him? because he's small? because he's prissy? because he doesn't perform and arguably does not enjoy the specific kind of masculinity expected of him, one of the fundamental conflicts of his character as-is like i mentioned above? why not, say, mike or ben? hell, why not bev?

and 2: i think it's important to acknowledge and be comfortable with and celebrate when cis men and trans men have experiences that can strongly relate to each other. as a trans man, i really identify with eddie and some of the experiences he's had or that i imagine he would have if his story continued.

this is obviously more personal and not so much connected with narrative coherence, but a cis man who knows how i felt the first time i wore gender affirming underwear, or finally had sex with the right gender dynamic, or shed the gender roles assigned to me one by one until i was just left with who i genuinely am, or made the choice to recover from childhood gender-motivated abuse, etc etc etc is really validating and nice. and tbh i think that is its own kind of representation.

it's not just true that trans women and cis women both have Women's ExperiencesTM and that trans men and cis men both have Men's ExperiencesTM, but also that many experiences we might associate with transness are not exclusive to transness and nor are they things that only happen to or are felt by people of the same assigned gender. like. it's not only that trans women have experiences of womanhood that cis women have, it's also that cis women have experiences of womanhood that trans women have (and the same goes for men), you know what i mean?

and it's just really disappointing to me that ftm trans eddie specifically is the most popular trans headcanon in the IT fandom, to the point of any other trans headcanon being fringe. and that it does generally seem to be because of transandrophobia-typical reasons like his size and "feminine" qualities (and frequently he is made to be more "nonthreatening" as well, even when not trans smdh). and that no one seems to want to engage with the particular gendered experiences involved in his character unless they make him trans first (in which case tbh they just erase them Differently, not less).

you don't have to be trans to have a complicated or interesting gender! you don't have to only identify with people who are just like you! sometimes trans men and cis men is the same! i just wish we could do something different one time!!

#how do i turn replies off lol #jack facts #it #eddie kaspbrak #hc #reading process #anyway in the noble and immortal words of nathaniel #a trans headcanon is not (and should not be) inherently an AU

[zalrb]

(Sorry for Gilmore Girls ask but you’re the only person who’s unbiased who can answer this.)

I’ve been thinking about Rory and her relationships and do you or did you ever think that Rory loved (liked?) Jess less intensely than both Logan and Dean?

It’s obvious that Logan is the person she’s most gone for, her Christopher in the sense that just like it was hard for Lorelai to say no to him when he was in her presence, it’s the same with Rory and Logan; but even with Dean I feel like there was this desperation feelings-wise that just wasn’t there with Jess. I was gonna write “even though she does leave Dean for Jess” but she doesn’t even do that, Dean had to break up with her first.

And I’m not saying all of this in the “that’s why she never deserved him” way. I don’t think so at all, and obviously she did want to make things work with him but he couldn’t have that in his life yet, it’s just, there was obviously connection, and attraction, but it was also just so easy for her to let go, If that makes sense, which was not the case with Dean and Logan.

I actually quite enjoy GG asks so don't apologize ;) and this is an interesting question.

I think before they get together, she was pretty intense about Jess and the New York episode is proof of that. She just had to see him and acted uncharacteristically because of it (I mean we can debate whether or not it's uncharacteristic, she did almost not go to Chilton because she met Dean but anyway)

it's true she didn't break up with Dean but she was acting pretty cruelly toward him and wasn't even thinking about it because she was so preoccupied with Jess

like even when she's talking to Paris about what to find in a boyfriend, at that particular moment it's obvious she's talking about Jess and not Dean

if there's anything I can say about that situation it's that I think they do a good job in showing that her feelings for Jess were kind of like this force that was taking a hold of her.

And I think that level of intensity could've very easily continued in their relationship -- she was seriously contemplating having sex with him to the point that she told Lorelai --

if Jess actually treated her well consistently

Near the end, she tells Lorelai that she doesn't like what she feels or what she does when she's with him

-- pausing my continuation of this thought to say when she has this kind of conversation with Lorelai about Logan

Logan actually steps up

so anyway, I think foe Rory it was easier to let the feelings for Jess go a) because she was starting her life, she was going to Yale, she was going to backpack throughout Europe, she made a deal with her grandparents so Lorelai could start the inn, she was ready to take the world by storm at that point in her life, she had shit to do, which is basically what she tells him on the phone

b) she dated Dean before she dated Jess and with Dean she got the treatment she wanted consistently and Lorelai has to give her a wake up call about that in Face Off

and by the time she calls Jess in that episode and leaves the voicemail posted above, she's comfortable with that being the way she wants to be treated

and Jess would give her that for a bit

and then something would happen and he'd stop being that way so I think it was easier for her to not hold onto anything as opposed to Dean who actually knew Rory in ways that Jess didn't (much like how Jess knew Rory in ways Dean didn't) in that he was able to also hang out with her and Lorelai and be a part of their inside jokes and be a fixture in the Gilmore household

and for all of the conversation around Rory and Jess being intellectual/pop cultural equals, Rory and Dean also had their own ability to just hang out and enjoy each other's company and enjoy how bizarre their town was and there was that level of safety that she talks about in the Revival and letting go of that especially when he did nothing wrong is hard and within the relationship it makes sense she'd be very much invested when the guy she's in the relationship with will build a car for her

and Logan, I think you've got a handle on, haha.

[last-night-is-a-blur]

What I wish S2 of S&L had done

I don't mind Jon's issues ( feeling sidelined, out of place, defenceless and less extraordinary than others in his family) being explored throughout the season, but the communication problems with his parents are getting annoying. I find it interesting, I really do, watching parent failing to see how much their kid is struggling, not understanding them and either not realising that they are giving their child insufficient and/or the wrong kind of support, or them being aware of it and just not knowing what to do or say. But I wish the show had gotten to the heart of that particular problem already, as well most of Jon's other issues. The x-k reveal should have been the turning point in that regard ( I know, I said was done talking about this subject)

Idk if there was some scheduling reasons for Nat and JHI being so absent, but I would have loved more Nat+ kent-lane stuff and Nat+ Sarah bropt.

I wish they would have gone full psychological/conspiracy thriller with Ally. Have her get into everyone's head, like she did with Sam. Make her untouchable bc of her connections and lack of evidence tying her to anything illegal. Use her being a cult leader and having a lot of followers and some of them are very powerful. How far does her influence reach? Who is on her side, and who can be trusted? Have her get useful intel from the DOD bc at least one of her follower works there. Have her show interest (either as herself or through one of her disciples) in the mines. Have Mayor Dean be funded by one of Ally's followers in exchange for something bad, tying mayoral campaign to the main plot and giving it some weight and higher stakes. Have Lois inform Lana of this, bringing her into the main plot in a meaningful way. Have the inverse society helping Dean sabotaging Lana's campaign. Have Ally do MAJOR damage to Lois' reputation. Maybe even have her gaslight Lois or Clark so they start questioning themselves. The paranoia and sense of being trapped in a chess game and you can't see all of your opponent's pieces. Have her hit Clark and Lois where it hurts and test their integrity and intelligence. Maybe have them going after Ally hurt the boys somehow, so they become conflicted. Superman could only do so much, bc without evidence he can't just grab her and take her to the dod or nearest police station and expect her to be arrested and she rarely attacks them physically ( and when she does, it's through someone else and they can't apprehend her bc they can't successfully proof her involvement).

Give Lucy a larger role ( again, her limited appearance could be bc of bts reasons). Let's show her someone determined to help ppl by spreading Ally's message. Not just focus on her as Lois' defiant sister, but as a loving aunt and a wannabe saviour of lost souls who is just trying to find meaning in her life. Maybe have her trying to bring Jon in, bc she sees he is lost, and he agrees, not bc he doesn't believe Ally is a cult leader, bc he wants to spy on the inverse society for his mom. Show her as someone friendly and caring and cool who just wants to be loved and help ppl.

Do something more with Anderson 's team since they brought it up, and the xk stuff beyond Jon's arc+Jordan saving Sam and Lois. Have Tag interact with the boys and Natalie. Have Clark help him with his survivor guilt. Have Jon or Jordan joining the team, or at least helping them out on a mission.

#superman and lois #jordan kent #jonathan kent #jon kent #clark kent #lois lane #natelie irons #jonathan kent ii #lucy lane #lana cortez #sarah cushing #sarah cortez #lana lang #lana cushing

[squeeze-the-lemon]

My proof that JD from Heathers had a SQUIP

It was late at night when I was listening to the Heathers soundtrack, when all of a sudden I came to the realisation that JD (heathers) has a SQUIP (bmc). (all according to the Heathers off-broadway soundtrack and the original bmc soundtrack)

Jason Dean 1) On September 1st, 1989, JD is a senior at Westerburg high school in Ohio 2) Lost his mother at a young age -- trauma 3) Moves from city to city often due to his dad’s work at Big Bud Dean Construction -- is a loner 4) Likes slushies from 7-11 which is a constant in his life

SQUIP 1) Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor -- a super computer made of math 2) Helps user achieve a goal and will go to extreme lengths to do so 3) Activated by green Mountain Dew, deactivated by red Mountain Dew (in the bmc universe, red Mountain Dew was discontinued in the 90s, not 1988) 4) Gets shut off by intoxicants -- alcohol messes you up, right?

JD and his SQUIP We can assume from JD going through '10 high schools' that he doesn't get chance to settle down in one place and make friends. High school is already a difficult place and it is made infinitely harder for him because he never stops in one place long enough. He went through 10 high schools in 3 years, that's over 3 high schools each year. He can't make deep connections with anybody because he doesn't have the chance.

Enter... the SQUIP

The SQUIP is programmed to make JD's high school experience less awful by showing him how to make short term relationships that leave a lasting impression on people, hopefully to make his high school experience more bearable. And the SQUIP carries out its task flawlessly. In Fight for Me, Veronica is immediately drawn to the attractive, loner bad-boy type because she finds him interesting. He rides a motorcycle for goodness sake! (This is similar to how Jeremy's SQUIP dictated his conversation to Brook). JD repeats what the SQUIP tells him to say. This happens again in Freeze Your Brain.

BUT

Before we go any further, it is important to note one thing. JD has found a way to temporarily shut off his SQUIP, and its not through alcohol like Jeremy suggested... its his slushies. His precious, precious slushies which give him a brain freeze, because 'who needs cocaine' when slushies are right there.

Freeze Your Brain This whole song is the SQUIP trying to make JD seem mysterious and edgy before JD freezes him out, is edgy and trauma dumps. He also mentions how when the 'voice in your head says you're better off dead' he just goes and reaches for a slushie - clear reference to the SQUIP telling Jeremy 'everything about you makes me want to die' and the final song 'Voices in my head'

Red Mountain Dew So we know that JD has a SQUIP at Freeze Your Brain. But how can he go from that to killing three students, threatening Veronica and almost blowing up a school. Well? The answer lies in the next appearance of JD - Dead Girl Walking. At the surface, Better chug that Mountain Dew seems like an innocent line, especially when compared to the context of the song. But it is this line that holds the key to the entire mystery, and it is Veronica’s order that leads to the death of her classmates.

Because there is a way to permanently shut off SQUIPS: Mountain Dew Red as stated in Be more Chill. At the time BMC is set, Mountain Dew Red is such a threat to the existence of SQUIPs that they get it discontinued. It is Michael’s obsession with 90’s drinks that saved the world from getting SQUIP'd. Though in real life Mountain Dew Red was discontinued in 1988, in the BMC universe it happened in the 90s meaning its possible that what JD chugged was red, and so permanently shut off his SQUIP

When he chugs the mountain dew, he, perhaps unknowingly, shuts off his SQUIP. There is no longer an external (internal?) force controlling him. It is the first time in a long time that JD can think and act for himself without the use of slushies.

From then on, we see his acts of violence escalate.

The Me Inside Of Me: Poisons Heather Chandler. She dies. Convinces Veronica to forge a suicide note

Our Love is God: Shoots Kurt and Ram. Manipulates Veronica to go along with him by lying to her

Seventeen: We ask ourselves: does he really love her? Maybe he does, maybe he's lying again. We don't know. He's unpredictable, we can’t trust him

Meant to be Yours And so, we come to Meant to be Yours. I've seen this song performed in many different ways but in the end it always comes back to JD who has finally snapped so we see him unrestrained and it is terrifying. Its this mix of rage and sadness which in him is a deadly combination.

He has lost his SQUIP which acts as his restraint and self control. Without it, we get the real, terrifying, movie-esque JD.

And then obviously later on if that wasn't enough he tries to blow up a school.

Timeline Its difficult to pinpoint exactly when or where JD got the SQUIP but considering he travelled so often it could have been anywhere. When going from Las Vegas to Boston he could have travelled through New Jersey (where bmc is set) before stopping in Ohio. Its possible.

This makes so much sense to me though. There are so many links that I can't not believe this (at least for the original off-broadway production). Did this convince you??

My headcannon is that JD's SQUIP looks like Christian Slater ok bye

#heathers #heathers musical #be more chill #be more chill musical #dead girl walking #bmc squip #be more chill squip #jason dean #muscials #theory #rambles

[shallowseeker]

TFW parenting, and pep-talking Jack:

Hey, Sammy DOES come into the domain of Jack's bedroom to act as Jack's father! It's in 14x01, when Dean is missing. :-) (TBF, He does this in 13x03 Patience too but that wasn’t well-received/was perceived by Jack as glib and fake.)

Anyway! This whole episode, Jack is pretty successfully being raised by The Village of Hunters. Everyone steps in: AU Bobby, Mary, Sam, Cas. (Of note, Jack doesn't feel better, really, until he talks to Cas.)

///

In this episode, Jack laments the loss of his powers.

In the Sam scene, Sam tries his best to sit with and comfort Jack, and he mostly does okay with that. Interestingly, Sam emphasizes "moving past it," because that's a Sam way of coping. Dissociate and get back to work.

This is a sharp contrast to when Dean comforted Jack about his nightmares in 13x23, which was to tell him, "It's not about being strong," and emphasize taking care of Jack.

Sam in 14x01:

SAM: I talked to Bobby. He says you may have had a rough day today. JACK (sullen, closed off): It was fine. Sam tries some more. SAM: I know it's a lot, I'm sure, but you can get past this. I know you will. I have faith in you, Jack, and I believe in you. (Mary enters; Jack still looks sullen and upset.)

It's a nice attempt, especially for Sam, who comes by connection in a more practiced, careful, "therapizing" manner. The conversation gets interrupted by Nick Vaught waking up. Nevertheless, even before the interruption, Sam's attempt gives off a stilted feeling, like Sam is reading from a self-help seminar.

He says, "You'll get past this," and "I believe in you." Somehow, it doesn't feel like he's coming down to Jack's level and getting real with him, as Dean and later Cas will do.

///

At the end of the episode, Cas comes into Jack's room, with his own face beaten to a pulp. Cas hasn't healed himself. He's letting Jack see his own weakness here. That it's okay to screw up. They all screw up all the time.

He asks how Jack is, and Jack sullenly mutters (again) that he's fine. Then, Cas tells Jack that he did well, and Jack explodes in a flurry of emotion, easily opening up to Cas: (we’ll see that he is more willing to hurl his genuine emotions at Cas, Mary, Dean…)

JACK: All I did was get punched...in the face! CAS (wryly): To be fair, we all got punched in the face. JACK: That's not--Before, when I had my powers, I-I could've done something. CAS (frankly): Jack, you don't-- you don't have your powers. And you- your grace should regenerate in time. But until then-- JACK: I'm useless. I can't kill demons, I can't find Dean, and Michael is in our world and I can't stop him. I can't do anything. I don't have...anything. CAS: Oh, Jack. That's just not true. You've got me. You have all of us. (touches shoulder) You have...your family. (then, passionately) And we are going to find Dean, and we are going to beat Michael, and we're going to do it together! Because that's what we do.

Cas's message seems to get through to Jack a little better here, though Jack is still uncertain and scared. Cas, like Dean, keeps it real with Jack (just like they keep it real with Claire). It doesn't sound so...canned. (Sorry, Sam. Ilu. You try so hard.)

Cas talks frankly: "Yes, you've lost your powers." He also, like Dean, emphasizes familial support and delivers a message of hope and unshakeable confidence.

///

Lastly, Jack is in his "Rocky Balboa" era. It's so adorable. I just wanted to point out his lil jogger outfit and make you imagine him training to "Gonna Fly Now." You're welcome.

No, literally. This is Jack is 14x01, except he's (somewhat hilariously) getting the crap kicked out of him:

#spn parenting #sam & jack #cas & jack #dean & jack #mary & jack #au bobby & jack #spn + rocky #Youtube #spn 14x01 #spn strangers in a strange land