#while my mom deep cleans the entire house and cooks every mean | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ox1-lovesick · 1 year

Note

hi love I HAVE A RQQQ- TXT OR ENHA WITH A SICK S/O PLEASE!! i have a killer cold and the worst dizzy spells ever nd i would love some comfort 😞😞 thank u sm

★ ✯ ☆ TXT WITH A SICK!S/O

★ pairing. txt x gn!reader genre. fluff, comfort warnings. mentions of food wc. 100-300 each

✯ synopsis. txt with a sick s/o!!

☆ a/n. firstly i am so sorry this took 4 months 💀 writers block is the bane of my existence. i do hope this manages to bring you some comfort though :( please do take care of yourself and get well soon! (even though you are most likely not sick anymore 😭) also how ironic is it that i'm currently sick... :')

YEONJUN | 연준

by your side 100% of the time you cannot get rid of him.

he's over your bed when you wake up in the morning, waiting outside the bathroom door for you, laying right next to while you're sleeping. everywhere you are, so is yeonjun

will bend over backwards to get you anything you need

water? medicine? soup? more blankets? less blankets? he's on it before you can even ask

cooks for you !!! tries to make your food as interesting as possible so you won't get bored, without adding things that will make you feel worse or aren't good for you

you're bedridden. don't even try to fight him

he won't let you lift a finger, he wants you to get as much rest as possible so you can get better as quickly as possible

infact don't even speak, he'll learn morse code so you can just beep him whenever you need

if his schedule allows he'll stay home with you and be by your side every second of the day, if not he's texting you every free moment he has to make sure you're okay

would definitely call in sick if you were feeling particularly tired and need his care that day

has multiple reminders to make sure you're taking your medicine on time, will scold you if you're even a second late

he'll never tell you but he secretly enjoys you being sick . . .

he love love loves to take care of you, especially when you call on him to do things for you it makes him all giddy knowing you need him (he's not a creep i swear)

he's ontop of you so much he probably catches whatever you have

atleast you're sick together

SOOBIN | 수빈

hates to see you sick

1. because it's gross 2. because he hates seeing you in pain but mainly because it's gross

you're not staying in his bed i'm sorry he's gonna come over to your house to take care of you during the day and go home to his snot free blankets at night

gets your medicine mixed up all the time and complains it's the doctor's fault for prescribing ones that look so similar

low-key takes advantage of this situation so he can skip work and spend some quality time with you LMAOOO

"sorry guys yn's still dying i can't come to work today"

at first it's fun because you just have your average head cold so he doesn't worry too much

but then it starts getting worse and he comes home to you falling over yourself in the kitchen because of your dizzy spells and nearly has a stroke

panik

he starts stressing like a mad man after that

probably gets himself sick just with how stressed out he is it's a problem

definitely calls his mom for help he doesn't know what to do

updates her on every little thing you do

"mom they just took a really deep breath does that mean something"

buys the entire pharmacy

wants to kick himself for not taking it seriously when you first got sick he feels so guilty 😭

although you did enjoy his company and the endless marvel marathons so all is well

will not leave you alone. you have to shit with the door open.

will do everything for you even if you're perfectly capable of doing it yourself

from brushing your hair to fluffing your pillows he's gonna do it all

he'll even clean for you, that's his ultimate declaration of love

in the end he didn't really do much to nurse you back to health but A for effort

BEOMGYU | 범규

i know practically everyone in moaville would say he'd tease the shit out of you but in my head he'd be the most worried for you

googles every single one of your symptoms and then cries himself to sleep because myonlineclinic.com told him you have cholera and 6 days to live

the only reason he'd tease you is to mask his worry

he'd watch you go through 60 boxes of tissues and be like "omg my snotty baby" but on the inside he's freaking out 😭

your pain is his pain, the way you feel affects him and his mood drastically

he's irritable when you are, he's tired when you are, your appetites probably sync too

puts a curse on whoever spread their nasty germs to you with ginger roots and vinegar

i think he'd also be the most sympathetic since he gets sick a lot more often than the others

so gentle and understanding compared to his usual self it's a little scary 😭

surprisingly good at negotiation like you're being stubborn because you don't want to take your medicine and he's like "if you drink the cough syrup i'll let you listen to the demos for our next comeback" and before you know it you've sold your childhood home to him for 3/4 of the initial price

will whip out his guitar and sing for you in a heartbeat if you ask him too

obviously tries to crack jokes and make you smile so you don't feel too miserable, he feels so accomplished even if you just scoff at him 🙁

gets back to his usual annoying self once you're better though

TAEHYUN | 태현

ironically, he doesn't know what to do

he rarely gets sick and when he does it passes in a day or two, so when you've been coughing like you have bronchitis for the past week he feels so lost

his first instinct is to take you to the doctor to figure out what's wrong but gets into a fight with doctor for charging him 19382928 won just to press his hand to your forehead and tell him you have a head cold (terry is against this capitalist society)

also buys the entire pharmacy

changes your entire lifestyle to the maximum efficiency so you get better as quickly as possible and makes sure you stick to it

strict like a prison warden, sometimes you wonder if he actually loves you

which he obviously does, but it's hard to believe so when he avoids any unnecessary contact with you as if you have the plague

takes you outside every once in a while to get some fresh air, he feels stuffy just watching you sit around

it also keeps you active 💪

he's always pestering you to wash your hands

will not let you touch him otherwise

makes sure he keeps your space clean, always has tissues and anything else you might need within your reach

at your aid 24/7

you take up a colossal space in his heart he's so soft for you

flying to your side before you even say anything

you don't even have to tbh he can read your mind

"how'd you know i wanted water?" "you looked thirsty"

if he notices you're feeling extra miserable he'll sing for you to cheer you up

swallows his pride because he's down bad and pulls out his best southern accent when you ask him to sing country music

he will be teased for the next millenia but it was worth it for you

he's like an overbearing mother but you get better the fastest when he's taking care of you

HUENINGKAI | 휴닝카이

another mama's boy

probably calls his sisters too

hiyyih would tell him to soak your pills in vegetable oil as a joke but he'll actually do it because he's just that hopeless

he's unable to think straight he just wants to do everything in his power to make you feel better 😭

although he gets the hang of it pretty quickly, he's a fast learner and genuinely enjoys taking care of you

always praising you !!

"wow yn!! i can't believe you ate all your soup!!! you're so cool!!!"

tries to distract you by showing you his entire collection of pokemon cards

probably lies and tells you they're all super rare and he's the only one in the world who has them

does his best not to cause you any stress, he just wants you to focus on resting

the things this man does because he loves you istg

he cleans the entire dorm because it's a breeding ground for bacteria and he doesn't want anything making you more sick

the guys come home to the house spotless they're just like 🤯🤯🤯🤯

taehyun asks you to get sick more often if it means he doesn't have to fight his way through the ironing board and bike to get to the sink

he even lets you play on his DS he's down bad

side rant: i feel like kai is secretly a neat freak, he abhors the sight of filth but is just too lazy to do anything about it so he forces himself to deal with it 💀

anyway he's such a sweetheart :( does his best to keep the mood up even if you're feeling miserable because your nose is so filled with so much snot that you can't breathe

his positive energy definitely rubs off on you!!!

he actually does a good job taking care of you, he's a bit stressed at first but you're back to good health in no time !!!

450 notes · View notes

kerubimcrepin · 4 months

Text

Episode 39 - The Love Killer

AKA the yandere dogboy episode. Yippie!

I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE. To bring back the meme:

God won't let me die...

The translation is not finished because I do not give a fuck, but here is where I stopped. I doubt anyone else will give a fuck either, considering it's just a keysmash.

He's never beating those japanese-coded allegations.

Silly aprons are a family tradition.

I wonder if this is where Kerubim lived considering he, like... didn't have a house. Or a family.

Oh my god, the shitty magical merchant guy had a shitty magical merchant mom.

I see claws on a catboy and my brain turns off. Kill me.

You can't be talking like that, Ouginak baby. Btw the can says "fish".

KERUBIM LIKES TO COOK. SEE? I TOLD YOU. I TOLD YOU. He's an Amaknean boy, like Yugo. And he's cooking crepes!

Though, he's... bad at it.

Presented without commentary.

Do not be making that face while in the same litter box as Keke, oh god.

Ecaflips use litterboxes confirmed.

UNDERAGE DRINKING REAL.

I bet Kerubim is the one who buys bamboo milk for the gang. He can probably pass for a very short ecaflip man, instead of a teenage boy.

People reading my blog talking about it be like: this is scary, downright creepy.

Also, whatever I imagine happened between Kerubim and Atcham is also scary. Even downright creepy.

The Astrubian lake tower, my beloved.

Somehow, despite being a boy, Kerubim has managed to have two evil adolescent girl friendships that end in your friend (who is a tar pit) sending you messages saying that she will "kill you with a knife" the next time she sees you at school. (One with Patafiks, and another with his literal brother.) This too, is feminism.

I like to think that while in the orphanage, he had to break up like this with Atcham too. Like "I know we're brothers, but um. uh. I don't want to be seen with you anymore. I mean—— you get beat up constantly, and people hate you, and then they hate me when you're nearby. Which is a bummer. Also you threaten everyone too much after they beat you up, and it's stressful. And I can't take it anymore... We can still be friends though,, haha."

I like to think Atcham's response was "I AM GOING TO KILL MYSSSELF AND IT WILL BE YOUR FAULT." or something. I like to imagine he had that ~mentally ill child~ style flair for the dramatic at that age. I like to think they were both awful to one another.

Another thing I like to think to myself, is that Atcham got kicked from the orphanage and ended up in Brakmar, and the reason he got kicked out is stabbing someone. Perhaps Keke, during some argument, — or perhaps someone else, in retaliation to whatever bullying he was going through. And that Kerubim was scared shitless of him by the end.

I just think it's a fun thought.

Basically, if that Ruby girl, Patafiks, and Atcham smoked weed together in a Bad Mentally Ill Bitches Obsessed With Revenge Club, Pangaea would reform.

Since this is already an Atcham headcanon heavy blogpost, I will say, I think using The Love Killer on Atcham would have fixed his every single problem.

Sadly, Kerubim has spent his entire life under the impression that Atcham actually hates him, whereas in actuality, whatever the fuck is happening, is 20 times funnier.

After a single minute of prodding by Joris he switches to therapyspeak and goes "well i need SOMEONE to be mad at. it's like a coping mechanism. if i need to be mad at something, it might as well be kerubim. because he's there. 😥"

It's interesting that with Patafiks and his ecaflip friends it took a second for them to hate him enough to cut all ties.

It's also interesting that this doesn't happen to Simone: Julie and her were on a bad date, but they were on it for a long time. And, Kerubim and Joris were haters for her, but all they could manage is some cleaning complaints.

Basically: Perhaps it can't ruin bonds that are very deep or genuine as fast? An enchantment meant to test the sincerity of a bond, gone awry? Or maybe I'm reading too much into this.

Flash frame!

As I've said in the previous blogposts: I really do think that Kerubim has a crush on Simone. Not in any creepy way — she's just the type of woman he's always liked, — headstrong and stylish, like Lou!

It's very cute. I am a big fan of friendships with one-sided crushes in media, especially when it's not awkward, or pointed out often, (the only exception being Dipper's whole Wendy-shtick in Gravity Falls. I think it was a pretty cool portrayal of the concept, despite being awkward), — because that's a very human thing that we can't really control, y'know?

It makes their friendship much more wholesome to me, personally.

Man. I love this show. And this silly old man. Even though he did fuck up superbly with the whole raising Joris thing.

#ep39 #ro liveblogs dofus #dofus #wakfu #krosmoz

14 notes · View notes

mazuwii · 1 year

Note

Can you just imagine hasn't? When you bring it up to Reiner at first, he's pretty much reluctant in being a house husband. This is because he's used to being the one moving around, going out, and doing work, right? All his life, all he knows is roughness and the toils of war. So, what could he possibly do all day cooped up in the house? But you convince him that it's his turn to just take it easy, relax, and to this time leave things to you. It's the least you can do for him, right? So, hesitantly again, he agrees. First few hours that he spends alone while you're gone, he's just mimicking what he does for his mom when he's in her home. Coz of being in the scouts before, he can at least clean the house decently. He can at least cook a little to save his stomach from starvation, so he does that too. And then you come home after a long day at work. You see the house is clean, and there's even a meal. He's already at the table, wondering if you'd even like the food he made. He sees you just staring at your home and his mind instantly jumps into conclusion. He apologizes that he hasn't really done anything. But you just shake your head and smile brightly at him, thanking him for tidying up. And for cooking a meal; and that you're really happy because it's the coziest you've ever been, coming home. And it's all because of him. At that point, something just clicks in Reiner. Seeing you so overjoyed, sparks a passion in him, which makes him look forward to what he can do tomorrow, the next day, and the day after that… all so he can see that glowing smile on your face all the time.

Coming back from a painful day at work to this notification is possibly the best thing that happened this year 😭😭😭😭

Because omg you’re so right?! He’s been a soldier his entire life so at first he thinks he could never be something as graceful as a housewife. He’s never seen it in men before

His entire life he thought he’d marry a woman and make enough money to give her and his kids a good sheltered life.

Nd yet he is standing in the middle of the store, mindlessly gazing at the pink apron you jokingly suggested he should wear. I mean- he only just started being a stay at home husband, he didn’t even know if it was his thing yet.

And please 😭😭😭😭 my guy probably burns instant noodles ☹️ but he’s learning (Imagine he goes to his mum for help😭😭😭😭)

My guy then decided to attend a cooking course with a bunch of old ladies who call him cute and handsome (I remember an old post talking about how Reiner is every old ladies idea of handsome and that’s so fuckin true)

Anywho these old ladies become very good friends with him- since Reiner is also an old lady deep down. They correct his mistakes, ask him about his life and what you do for a living.

It doesn’t take long before he masters the basics- and even then he was nervous and doubted himself, sitting by the plate, anxiously waiting for you to come downstairs.

Your astonished at how such an intimidating man is sitting in front of you with a vivid blush and fidgeting with his fingers, his frail sweet heart depending on whatever words you decide to say next.

“ITS PERFECT REI!!” You launched off your chair to run to his side. The corners of his lips curled up into a lil giggle as you basically smothered him into your chest.

#reiner braun #reiner #he’s just so proud #the perfect male wife #omg what have I done #what have I written #no but seriously y’all send me some househusband rei content #it makes me sooooo high #in a good way #I LOVED THIS THO #THANK YOU BABES #IT RESLLY CHEERED ME UP

18 notes · View notes

thelonelyhoneybee · 2 months

Text

the tea is how he demanded to see her once since we’ve been gone- with no contact, in which not even the state would provide in the state of tennessee.

the tea is how he hasn’t helped a damn dime since we’ve been gone. i have purchased an entire wardrobe, hygiene items, 10+ cans of formula, she eats food now so im sure you know what that means, went through two cases of diapers and wipes each, and don’t get me started on the activities i have paid to do with my child with my alongside NEW freedom since leaving. AND I AM POSITIVE I AM FORGETTING SOMETHING, but this is all out of pocket no fucking assistance.

the tea is he only liked the label of being a father. he complained he could never relax or sleep due to my decision of not aborting her. he blamed her and i why he would stay up playing video games, watching tv, masturbating, or passively scrolling instead of doing his homework that inevitably caused him to flunk the term.

the tea is he would lie about going to his moms to go see a girl i was talking to first because he seeks on finding partners that look like me or HM. or maybe it’s because he does whatever it takes to hurt people. he enjoys getting deep. maybe it wasn’t a motive but it’s gotta be the icing on the cake. i was the main provider countless of times while he played like he wasn’t a father outside. i went out twice in 9 1/2 months. if i left the house without my child, i promise you it got so bad about me hearing about it i either didn’t leave or i always took her with me.

the tea is how he would give me black eyes and bruises weekly but was quick to forget the whole reason why he started to beat my ass in the first place. i am a domestic violence survivor. my ex prior did unspeakable things to me that are everlasting. when confrontation occurs between my partner and i, i back away. i am quiet. i like to revisit due to my ptsd. i have been punched for talking, spitting blood, or crying because of every time i didn’t speak before with the same man you support. my ptsd caused by old abuser influenced the tactics on my latest because HE forgot who I have become or how to ever speak to me. he forgot and stopped caring because i wasn’t his interest after i became a complication with HM. i was only convenient.

the tea is how he craved an abortion and also threatened to kick me in the stomach several times. in which i have documents to support both of these. or how he would tell me that he was searching for a new mom for her, one that doesn’t ask questions, takes care of the kid, cooks and cleans, does what is told, etc all because he truly believes he doesn’t have to help. (i have texts of this as well as voice recordings)

the tea is how i helped him STILL when i was pregnant to go get assistance because of him having an STI. i played dumb, but no one RANDOMLY gets an infection in their nut sack let’s be fucking for real here

the tea is how i was manipulated into believing he was my best friend- who wanted me to find new partners just to bag the girl i was talking to AND have sex with the trans (trans m2f), who also originally were both either wanting to talk or were talking to me… or how i wasn’t allowed to be with friends or family.. i wasn’t allowed to know the true feeling of love for 5 fucking years. i still do not unless it comes from my child. these black eyes are why I never came to see you, Emma. this is why i never got the formal opportunity of allowing you to get close to me. i knew what would come.

the tea is how he would hit me, yell at me that i am the one who wanted to have this child, force me to quit my job that payed more so that way he can keep his “ego” and told me that the only person AND MAIN PERSON that needs to take care of Genevieve Ryleigh Anne Stewart is Annie Danielle MOTHER FUCKING THAYER. WHY ARE THINGS DIFFERENT NOW??? WHY DOES HE GET TO COMPLAIN ABOUT NOT SEEING A CHILD WHEN I HAVE DOCUMENTED PROOF OF NO FUCKING MESSAGES FROM THIS MAN.

the tea is how charges were pressed on me but we know who really did things… he will, can, and has the power and the voice to be very impactful. he is very influential. in other words, someone is great with hiding things from their partners alongside with wearing masks..

i could go on for hours- sincerely-

you sure you don’t want that coffee? or maybe tea? you seem really thirsty. do not fret, my book is coming soon. i have been painted a villain in multiple fictions by a con artist, womanizer, narcissist, and manipulative concoction that this “man” necessarily is. i will no longer respond or react to these messages that are anonymous. i am taking the HIGHER route.

at this point of time, i do not care about an excuse for a person when they do not and have not provided. there’s a reason a man will sit up in another woman’s house, eating her food, shacking up, and influencing her perception with head and performances like this…

i don’t hate you anymore Hannah. I envy Hannah getting to leave.

I am not a hateful person. I am not keeping anyone away from Genevieve. I am a good mom. I live my life every day for Genevieve. I have been a better mom since finally putting my foot down and giving up on my best friend of 5 fucking years.

i gave up on you ever changing

i gave up on you

don’t burn yourself, i know it’s hot

#entry #HC #ES #CS #FINAL ENTRY #nomorefreecontent

0 notes

renaissanceman5073 · 10 months

Text

50 Reasons to leave your lover, and 4 reasons to stay...

Old romantic relationships are always easy targets. The arguments are old, the insecurities are old, the communication is stale, the sex is old, and even the hopes, dreams and goals get worn. On any given day, anyone in a long term relationship, like a marriage, can probably think of 50 reasons to leave. Most, if not all of those reasons are petty little mole hills that, over time, have turned into mountains. "I never have clean socks," over time, morphs into "she doesn't care about me," then "she willfully ignores me," then finally, "we just aren't partners in this thing." "He doesn't take out the trash" turns into "he doesn't contribute around the house," then "he doesn't value our relationship," and finally "he's a lazy asshole."

The thing is, if you started your analysis with "he's a lazy asshole," you would never have dated, much less married the guy. Conversely, "not washing socks" is just not a good reason to give up the love of your life. The 50 petty reasons are really nothing more than projector screens upon which we project all of our hurts, insecurities, and disappointments with one another. Deep down, there may only be one or two reasons to really leave, neither of which has anything to do with socks, laundry, trash, lawn mowing or cleaning out the garage.

I had 50 reasons to leave my wife. She had 150 reasons to leave me. After 20 years of marriage however, I am quite certain that each of my reasons could be traced back to a small conversation or gripe that I voiced and was not adequately addressed. I'm sure she could perform the same analysis. But then we didn't spend enough time thinking about the reasons to stay. The reasons to stay are usually big, bold, and age well like a good Bordeaux. They simmer all day on the stove and create that inviting smell of home after a long day.

1. Intimacy

Life really is difficult without intimacy. There is a reason that most people do not want to be isolated on a deserted island for the rest of their lives. While that may have occasional appeal to the mom, who has changed diapers all day, washed stinky sheets, cooked the meal and bathed the kids, at the end of most days she would miss the company. Intimacy is that feeling that you and the other person really are one flesh. That you know everything, good and bad, that there is to know about one another and you have made the choice to accept that person for who he or she really is. While helping that person become the person they want to be, you are reassuring them that they are loved and accepted for who they are. Intimacy is not uncomfortable and, while it requires a great deal of work to achieve and maintain, it is the glue that keeps things together, even through tough times.

2. Familiarity

It is said that familiarity breeds contempt, but I don't think that is really the case. If it were, we wouldn't slip on that old pair of slippers or those perfectly shaped yoga pants to lay around the house on a Saturday. While new things are shiny and exciting, there is something to be said for the old, reliable things that have come to mean more to us than just their function. Relationships are the same way. I find myself, for example, gravitating towards people that make me feel comfortable, make me smile and laugh, or make me feel warm and desired. I doubt I am any different than anyone else. While the new relationships are exciting, they can also be exhausting. No one wants to sit around every Saturday afternoon with someone they have to impress the entire time. At some point the spark fizzles a bit, and you best be comfortable and happy with what comes next. If that pair of slippers is old and never fit right, well, you have a problem and you'll never be comfortable - no matter how familiar with them you are. But, on balance, I think we'd rather have the old things that have more often than not made us happy.

3. Company

Being alone is nice. I am a man that likes to spend a lot of time alone. But, I am not a man that wants to be alone forever. When we face life alone, we are facing it in a way that God never intended. He intended us to have one another to share both happiness and sadness with, anxieties and excitements. God created Eve for Adam for this exact purpose. He wanted us to have life long companionship. At the end of a hard day, I need to be alone for awhile. The harder the day, the more alone I need to be. At some point, however, it is time to emerge from the cave and rejoin the family. My daughter's voice, my son's laugh and my ex-wife's gentle hands on the back of my neck in that spot that always hurts would remind me of the importance this companionship played in my life.

4. Love

Love comes in many forms. Love changes over time. It morphs, like an argument over socks, into something much larger than just attraction and limerence. Love grows over time, generally speaking, and forms the foundation for unconditional acceptance, that forms the basis for intimacy. When you've loved someone or something for a very long time, it is extremely difficult to want to leave it behind. That's not to say it doesn't happen or that it is not sometimes warranted. But, even disappointing relationships, if they are based on love, never really end. They just fade into the background.

#traditional family #traditional gentleman #renaissanceman5073 #traditional femininity #traditional gender roles #traditional gentlemen #traditional marriage

0 notes

afrustratedmom · 1 year

Text

I love my partner. I truly do. But this week has been one that tested my patience and my resolve.

I know he works full time, I know he tries. I am grateful for him and his love for us. But fuck it, you know who else works? You know who else loves this family? ME! I am touched out. I have a baby stuck to me 24 hours a day. We have no outside help, no one to take the load off. So between working with a baby, cleaning the entire home, cooking, and being in charge of the household, I just want my partner to come home and do a few tasks for me. And not just do them, but do them correctly.

Nothing is worse than doing shit and doing it half-assed.

A good example: while he sleeps and never hears the baby crying, I am up every few hours pumping. It drains me. It means I'm sleep deprived.

So after my 3 AM pump session, I placed both bottles of milk in the fridge, right next to each other. At 7 AM the alarm goes off and he refuses to get up which means I have to get my stepson up and dressed and make him breakfast. Hubby is still sleeping. After attempting to wake him for the 15th time, he finally wakes up. Any longer and I would have to be the one that drives said kid to school. I ask him to get a 3 ounce bottle ready and to please feed the baby. At this point I've been up since 3 AM, fed my stepson, have him dressed, brushed his teeth and am pumping again. ALL he has to do is heat the milk up and feed the baby. She needs. Exactly. Three. Ounces. After I've finished pumping and instructed said child to place his dish in the sink and am trying to push everyone out the door because I have a hell of a schedule for the day, I ask my partner, "Did she take the 3 ounces okay?"

"3 ounces? I only gave her 2. I couldn't find anymore milk in the fridge." So he didn't see the milk in the bottle. The milk in the bottle in the same fridge as the first bottle. The milk in the bottle in the same fridge as the first bottle right NEXT to bottle he took. Before I can utter anything even remotely mean, I take a deep breath and I quietly ask him to please just take our son to school. "You've been annoyed with me for the last week." Yes, I have been. Because now I have to heat up the water again. I have to add another ounce or she'll start screaming and crying in a few. Because every fucking time you drop the ball, it's me who has to pick it up. And it's every task that's asked of him. It's everything he does, or often times doesn't do in this house. The weaponized incompetence is un-fucking-real. Signed, A Frustrated Mom

#motherhood #momlife #relationships #parenthood #frustrated #momblogger #mom life

1 note · View note

showmeurtitties · 2 years

Text

Bro my neighbor keeps asking me to clean her apartment for her, she’s only a year older than me and could easily do it herself. Last time she asked me to “help her clean” she sat on the couch and watched tv while I cleaned and she even made me do the dishes for her. I got sick of it cuz everyday she would call me and make me clean or ask me to hang out but as soon as I’d go down to her apartment she’d hand me a trash bag. I’ve said no several times but she’s super insistent and won’t take no for an answer. She even asked me to clean on the day of my uncles funeral and then I said no I have to go to my uncles funeral. And then after the funeral she asked me again. While I was at the party where my family celebrates my uncles life my eating and talking about him and their memories of him. The girl has never once paid me after I helped her clean. And when I say clean I mean deep clean. 4 hours cleaning non stop. Even cook for her, clean the cats litter box and bathe her cat. Last time I was at her apartment she asked me to watch her self harm. I blocked her number and now I’m avoiding her. After I blocked her number I thought that was the end of it. No. She comes to my apartment everyday and asks my mom if I’m home, my mom always makes up an excuse while I hide in my bedroom closet in case the girl wants to check my room (cuz she’s asked to check before). My entire family hates her cuz they all know she’s harassing me. She calls and texts me from several different numbers EVERY DAY. So far Shes called me from 7 different numbers. Ever since this started I’ve started having panic attacks. One time when my mom wasn’t home she came into our apartment. The door was unlocked. She came into my bedroom while I was sleeping and woke me up to tell me to come clean. Now my mom put a lock on my bedroom door and has started locking our front door when she leaves for work. We told our landlord about her and he’s mad cuz I will help him with electronic stuff from time to time (he’s old) and he really likes me. He doesn’t know she’s been calling me from several different numbers but he does know that she’ll make me clean and just sit there on the couch and watch tv. The reason we didn’t tell him everything is because my moms afraid that he’ll go to her and confront her. He’s 7ft tall and scary as fuck. And he’s not afraid to raise his voice. I really don’t want to cause drama with her cuz she would probably try to fight me and I’m afraid of her. Plus I’ve never been in a fight before and she’s taller than me and I only weigh 100 lbs so I’d get my ass kicked. But I just wish she’d take a hint and leave me alone. I have to tip toe around my house everyday because I’m afraid she’ll hear me and knock on the door or call me. It’s like I’m living in hell.

0 notes

maizumis · 3 years

Text

— HAIKYUU BOYS WHEN THEIR CHILD SAYS THEY ARE NOT THEIR FAVORITE PARENT

ft. timeskip!miya atsumu, suna rintarou, iwaizumi hajime, bokuro koutaro, osamu miya

note: reader refered as mom ‼️ not edited cos I'm sleepy </3 enjoy hotties 😽

•ATSUMU opened the door with his daughter in one hand while the other had a huge blue balloon she wanted, hearing the click of the door you turn around and see your little bundle of joy running with open arms to you "mommy! I missed you" event if the two of them went out for an hour and a half, you really missed her too "aww darling! I missed you too! I'm your favorite, right?" she gave your cheek a sweet kiss with his tiny hands in your jaw "yes! mommy the best" at this scene, atsumu was long forgotten on the door, amused about what his daughter just said "and what about papa? he bought you this balloon!" he moved his hand to make presence of it, slightly jealous of you "papa is very good too! it's just mommy is always the best" you let go of her embrace, tucking her brown hairs behind her ear "why don't you go and clean yourself? I can make a choco milk!" she didn't need to be told twice that was already running to the bathroom " ‘tsumu you know she doesn't mean it, right?" pouty atsumu came walking to you "a know but a want to be her favorite now!" chuckling at his childhood behavior, you make sure to peck him before going to the kitchen, even after all this year's you never failed to make him blush "you can be her favorite tomorrow ‘tsum, come hug me now"

• SUNA had his daughter on his lap, paw patrol playing softly on the TV in front of them, you always tease him about how he is more into the show than his own daughter but he is quickly to change the subject, everytime "how was your day at school baby?" the little girl raised her head from his chest, messy hairs blocking her sight " ‘t was okay, I missed mom" his hand was already on the hairs in front of her eyes, using the hair-band he always had on his wrist just in case something like this popped out "and you missed dad too I like to think" she hummed before resting her head on his torso again, little hands roaming around his body like she was caressing him "I did, but mommy is my favorite so I missed her more... I'm gonna go to sleep daddy, wake me up when mom ‘s home" and with that she was out, leaving suna with wide eyes and lots of questions filling his brain, the clack of the open door scares him, even knowing it's you coming home from work, he was deep in thought "a penny for your thoughts, rin?" he sighs before patting the place next to him on the couch, you gladly obey and lay your head on his broad shoulders "she told me you're her favorite" you interlaced your fingers with his, giving him a little squish "you know she is just a child, right? she lives you so much, everytime you're away she only talks about you" a little hope came back to his eyes "really, she talks about me?" you hummed, assuring him he is the one of the biggest thing in his daughters mind "lots, rin"

•IWAIZUMI was playing with his daughter in the backyard, his hands on both sides her waist while he throws her up and down the air "higher daddy! higher!" her little giggle brought life to his ears, this kid was gonna be the death of him "I wanna fly! like the birds we saw in the park!" "that's very high, sweetie" she was screaming her lungs out, non-stop laughing, toothy smile on her face that had a little of chocolate that Hajime gave her after lunch as a secret between the both of them. to lost in their own world, they didn't notice your arrival, they were having the times of their lifes "I'm home! where's my sweet girl and lovely husband?" her eyes got wider than they already were and her smile impossibly bigger "mama! you're home, put me down dad I wanna go hug mom!" he placed her down on the grass and her little legs were running as fast as they could "mommy! we had such a funny day! we saw lots of things outside?" you could tell hajimd was a proud dad, his daughter being talkative and smart, she sometimes reminds him of tooru "yeah? and what else" "I was telling daddy I wanted to be a bird but I missed you so much! you know you're my favorite, mom" hajime's lips were pressed into a thin line while his brows got a little down, you could tell he was feeling a little insecure so a little assurance wouldn't make him wrong "go inside and change your clothes then we can do something together, how does that sound?" she went inside the house screaming he was gonna wear her favorite blue dress, you giggled at her cute actions "hajime, the entire neighborhood can feel you, she doesn't mean it, she is just a child, we did the same when we were her age" he went towards you and placed his big arms around your waist, placing his head on the crook of your neck "I know, but we were having such a good time" your hands came to his face so you could make him see you "and we are gonna keep having a good time! we have to make sure you're her favorite by the end of the day, come on big boy! we are in this together" and with that you started running inside the house, holding his hand in the way in, the feeling of love and pride fulfilling his heart, happiness and love could be described like this exact moment, he thinks

•BOKUTO happily took his son out, ready to spend a little ‘daddy-son day’ as he called them, sometime they would go to his practice or to the aquarium! to learn everything they can about the infinity of animals the ocean has. today they decided they would be going for an ice-cream then straight to the park to play a little "okay bud! what flavors do you want? one or two?" the kiddo look up to the list of flavours that were in front of him ‘so many choises’ he thought before speaking "chocolate and vanilla please!" his choose of flavors made bokuto think about the old days, when you would wait for him in highschool after every practice to go on a date, you always, and he means always, wanted to eat vanilla ice-cream, I didn't matter the occasion "you know, your mom loves vanilla ice-cream! what if we buy a little for her?" his little golden eyes were shinning at the mention of his mom "yes! she's my favorite so she deserves ice-cream for being a good mommy" mid way taking his wallet out of his pocket, bokuto stops, looking directly to the floor "I'm sorry, your favorite what?" "my favorite parent! duh" he tried, he really tried not to have an episode in front of everyone but his deflated hair was exposing him "oh, that's good! your momma is perfect!" "she indeed is, dad!" the laugh of his son made him feel a little better, but ache on his heart was still there; after both of them has their ice-creams in hand, they started walking towards the park hand in hand "yummy! daddy this is delicious! you're absolutely my favorite!" like that? kids changes of opinion that fast? either way, his heart was pumping with joy "of course I'm your favorite! let's go play and the we can buy more ice- cream!" needless to say, you had a fridge full of icecream that night and two sugar rushed boys

•OSAMU has one twin in either side of him, his little girl with two pigtails while is beautiful boy had a green apron on "I know mommy will love this!" the little boy exclaimed, his daughter quickly following behind "uh-huh! mommy always love when we cook for her" osamu was happy he had this life, he didn't expect to have twins the first try but here he was, bragging about his perfect set of kids to his brother every chance he had "yer mommy loves both of ya so much" the kids were trying to make the onigiri shape with the rice while giggling "I know mommy love us! she is my favorite indeed" osamu's heart skipped a beat after hearing is daughters words "ugh she is my favorite too! I love it when mama let us sleep with her" but why is he saying this when he lets them sleep with him too? "that's right! we need to make this onigiri perfect so she is proud" nervously chuckling to erase a little the tension he was feeling "okay, daddy keeps going from here, go set the table and change yer smelly clothes!" the kids were racing to their respective bedrooms, yelling how they were gonna be prettier than the other one. the younger twin was so deep in thought leaning on the kitchen counter that he didn't acknowledge your presence "samu, baby, I'm here, everything okay?" his features relaxing when he saw you, gently placing one hand in your chin to kiss you "everything good sweetheart, the kids just told me yer their favorite parent so am just thinking a lil" you were laughing at his concern, those same kids told you this morning that his papa was their favorite "you want to know something fun ‘samu?" he raised a brow before his hands found home on your waist, gently pressing your chest to his "what, love" your hand came to play with the hairs he has on the forehead "this kids told me this morning you were his favorite, don't take to seriously what they said ‘samu, they love you unconditionally" taking your advice, he pecked you before hearing little steps coming to the room "our alone time has ended angel, a love ya" finishing his words with a sweet kiss

1K notes · View notes

cherrycocaineee · 3 years

Photo

13. Dean Winchester - Confession

Bobby was sitting at his desk flipping through the millions of dusty, old, torn books he had collected over the years when I came down the stairs, carrying my purse along my shoulder. The sound of my small feet thumping against his creaky wooden floors caused him to look at me. He was already drinking scotch this early in the morning and the tired, purple bags under his eyes proved that he had a restless night just like usual. I smiled sympathetically at him as I approached, getting a large whiff of the liquor he was pouring down his throat. I could hardly count the number of times I’ve warned him and the boys about drinking so much, yet they never listened. Though I didn’t really expect them to, considering all of the things they’ve seen in their lifetime.

“Where are you off to?” He asked, pouring himself another glass of scotch.

“We’re low on groceries,” I hummed, “so I’m going down to the market to pick some stuff up. I’ll make breakfast when I come back, okay?”

“I’ll hold ya to that. You need any money?”

I shook my head and patted the side of my purse before leaving for the market. It wasn’t a long trip, it was literally a block from where Bobby lived. When I arrived at the small, yet vibrant place, I inhaled the sweet scent of freshly picked produce and other aromas. Inside I pushed the basket around and collected everything we needed for the house: fresh produce, meats, bread, eggs, and much more. Considering how much fast food I use while travelling with the boys, I was happy to find a place that sold freshly grown fruits and vegetables, and freshly cut chops of meat, and more. I spent an hour in total at the market before paying for my groceries and heading back to the house.

While carrying all of the paper bags inside, I could hear talking going on inside. I shook it off as Bobby being on the phone and continued.

“Bobby, I’m home,” I called, “I’m about to start breakfast, so why don’t you trade that scotch in for a cup of coffee.”

The voices from the other room quieted down just as I placed the groceries on the kitchen table. I walked out of the kitchen and saw Bobby standing in the middle of the room with none other than Dean and Sam. My eyes widened at the sight of them. The last time I saw Sam was when he jumped into the cage, holding Lucifer in and knocking Michael inside too. And Dean, well, I hadn’t seen him since he went to live with Lisa and Ben. It had hurt a lot when he left too, not wanting to stay with Bobby. Not wanting to stay with me. But I didn’t make a big deal about it despite being madly in love with him. Though I’d never tell him that since he was in love with Lisa.

“Hey, Persephone,” Sam and Dean said simultaneously, making my eyes water.

“Hey,” I whispered, a smile forming on my face.

I walked over to them and embraced them both, feeling their large, muscular arms wrap around my thin frame as they held me close. As I pulled away from the hug, Lisa popped her head around the corner. My chest was tightening as I saw Dean walk over to her. They went off to speak to one another, I cleared my throat and turned my attention to Sam.

“When did you get back from hell?” I asked.

From the look on his face and the way he was rubbing the back of his neck with his rough hands, I knew there was something he wasn’t sure he wanted to tell me. Or at least the truth anyway. But he decided that he’d tell me in the end.

“A year, actually,” he muttered.

My forest green eyes widened at his words. I spent the next fifteen minutes tearing a new one into both Sam and Bobby, who had been hiding this from me the entire year, then returned to the kitchen to cook breakfast. There was a mix of frustration, betrayal, and other emotions mixing up inside of me as I started scrambling the eggs and cooking the sausage and bacon. Quiet sizzling could be heard throughout the kitchen, masking the sound of my humming while I cooked. As I was moving on to the coffee, I heard footsteps coming from behind me so I swirled around to see Dean walking in. He didn’t look too happy either.

“Did you just find out that Sam’s been back for a year too?” I questioned, throwing away the old coffee grounds into the trash.

“Well yes,” he stated, “but that’s not while I’m upset.”

I had started plating the food by then, starting off with Ben’s since he was here and was probably hungry.

“What’s going on?”

I set a cup of coffee down in front of him.

“Sam needs my help hunting a Djinn,” he answered, “and I’m worried because the things might come after Lisa and Ben.”

Honestly, I should have seen that coming. Sam, despite being back from hell, wouldn’t have asked Dean for help if it wasn’t life or death. It made me wonder if they’d only come to drop off Dean's family or to ask me to help. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t jealous of Lisa, in fact, I was happy for her and Dean. It just hurt every time I saw them together.

“So that’s why you brought them to Bobby’s,” I whispered, buttering some fresh French bread, “so we could watch them while you guys hunted the Djinn?”

“Well actually,” Dean said, placing his cup on the table, “just for Bobby to watch them. You’re coming with us right?”

A small, sad smile appeared on my face as I lifted up Bobby’s plate while shaking my head.

“I don’t hunt anymore, Dean. When Sam jumped into that cage and you left to go live with Lisa and Ben, the two of you left me behind. So I just stopped hunting. Now I just clean up and cook while studying.”

“Studying?”

“I started going back to school. Granted it’s online but I figured I might as well get an education.”

It was silent between us, so I just walked away and headed towards Bobby with his breakfast. He was sitting at his desk once again when I arrived and graciously welcomed the warm food. I went back into the kitchen, where Dean was still sitting, and picked up the plate for Ben then headed upstairs to give it to him.

Lisa was unpacking their overnight bags when I reached the room they were staying in. Ben was sitting on the bed, playing some video game on his gaming device. Tapping on the door, I caught their attention and smiled welcomingly.

“Hey,” I said, “I’m Persephone, a friend of Sam and Dean’s. I made your son some breakfast if he’d like to eat.”

A smile appeared on her face in return, “thank you, Persephone. I’m Lisa and this is Ben.”

I didn’t tell her that I already knew her name, that would be rude. Instead, I shook her hand and placed Ben’s food down on one of the nightstands. He thanked me and started shoveling food inside his mouth fast. It reminded me of how Dean would eat when he was in a rush. Swallowing the forming lump inside my throat, I left the two of them to finish unpacking. Halfway down the stairs, I froze and gripped the railing tight. My heart felt like it was racing, tears were streaming down my cheek as I tried to collect myself. Wiping away the unwanted water leaks, I sighed softly and went downstairs. Sam and Dean were getting ready to leave when I made it to the main room. The two Winchester brother’s faced me when I entered.

“You sure you don’t want to come, Perse?” Sam inquired.

I held up my hands and giggled, “no thanks. You guys be safe.”

I hugged them tightly, almost relaxing when I felt the safety of their embrace. They said a final goodbye to Bobby and I then left for wherever it was they were going to hunt this monster. Bobby returned to his breakfast and I went into the kitchen to pack up the leftovers and clean up. Once the kitchen was tidied up, I headed back upstairs to my room to get some reading done. I had some homework assignments that were in desperate need of doing before midnight tomorrow and I liked to stay ahead of the clock.

Hours and hours passed before I finally passed out while reading my book. No dreams occupied my slumber while I napped, however, I was eventually awakened by the sound of someone knocking on my door. Stirring around in my covers, both eyes pried themselves open and stared at the dimly lit ceiling before looking to my right and seeing it was well past three o’clock in the morning. Another knock echoed throughout the room and I finally dragged myself out of the comforting quilt and onto the assaulting, cold floor. I rubbed my eyes to wipe the sleep away and pulled the door open. Lisa was standing on the other side, holding a plate in her hand.

“Bobby said that you were up here studying, and you missed dinner,” she said, “did I wake you?”

“Yeah,” I groggily whispered, “but it’s okay.”

I took the plate from her and saw that she had cooked some chicken noodle soup. It smelled great, reminding me of my early years in life when I still lived with my mom. She followed me inside of the room as I sat criss crossed on my bed with the soup in hand, smelling the melted butter on the toast. My eyes met the clock once again and was astonished to see that I had slept and studied for such a long time. It felt like only seconds ago that it was morning and I had just finished cooking breakfast.

“Persephone,” Lisa said while I slurped the soup up, “I’m sure you’re aware of the things Sam and Dean do, right?”

“Of course,” I answered before scooping another spoonful of soup in my mouth.

“How were you okay with it? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love Dean and I understand that he’s gotta do what he has to, but sometimes I worry that he’ll come home hurt or something will follow him home.”

Though there was a ping in my chest when she said she loved Dean, I couldn’t help but smile at how worried she was for him. It was something that he definitely needed since he was always worrying about other people. I placed the plate onto the empty nightstand and scooted closer to the edge of the bed, patting the spot next to me. When Lisa sat down, I took her hands into my own.

“It’s a lot to process,” I whispered, “when I met Sam and Dean, I was so unsure about leaving everything I knew to travel with them and fight all of those monsters. But I know deep down in my heart that they would never let people they love get hurt and they’ll die trying to protect those they consider family. Especially Dean. What you can do for him, is just be there, even if it’s hard. Because at the end of the day, he needs that most of all.”

The two of us shared a hug before she agreed she would do her best to make Dean feel loved and secure. After saying goodnight to me, she retreated back to her room, closing the door behind her. When she was out of sight, I grabbed my soup again and slowly started slurping it up again. It was comforting knowing that she would be taking care of Dean. Once he came back, I’d persuade him to go back with Lisa, telling him that he deserved to be with someone that made him happy.

The next day came quickly and I hadn’t fallen back asleep after my conversation with Lisa, so I spent the rest of the entire night reading. Soft, illuminating rays of sunshine burst through the clear, white curtains in my room as I finished throwing on a short-sleeve, white, shirt that only tied close. Running my fingers through my brushed hair, I fixed up any lumps that were visible.

Bobby was asleep at his desk when I reached downstairs, so I went over to him and wrapped a blanket around his snoring body. Picking up his almost empty bottle of scotch, I carried it back to the kitchen to put it away and make a new pot of coffee. Wanting nothing more than to sit outside with a non-school book and my delicious morning nectar, reading as the sun played against my pale skin. There was no telling when Sam and Dean would be home, along with there being no way of knowing when they would wake up. So I wanted to get in as much peace and quiet as possible before the day began.

With the coffee cup in my right hand and a good book in the other, I sat on the back of one of Bobby’s rundown cars and started reading. Four chapters in and I was already getting up to make myself a second cup of joe. Just as I slipped off the back of the rusted car, Dean and Sam pulled up. The sun was only just inching towards the middle of the sky when they arrived. Both climbing out of their seats, I noticed that they were not only tired but relieved.

“How’d it go?” I inquired, “seemed pretty quick.”

“It went fine,” Sam replied, “except Dean’s got a big slash on his arm. They came right at us.”

I went over to Dean and saw that he had wrapped his cut in a cloth but the blood was still leaking through. Clicking my tongue, I shook my head while leading the two of them inside. Sam explained on the way that they had figured that the Djinn were targeting both of them, so they went back to Dean’s home and waited there. When Dean noticed that his friends and neighbors were being killed, he ran to help and ended up almost dying. But Sam helped him. The fight raged on but in the end, the Winchester boys came out on top. Sam went to wash up while I started taking care of Dean’s wound.

With the First Aid Kit laying beside me on the kitchen table, I unwrapped his wound and gulped at the sight of it. Dean chuckled.

“Makes you miss the old days, huh?” He laughed.

“Not really,” I giggled, “a lot of it may have been great but watching the two people I cared the most about get injured was never easy.”

“It was never easy watching you get hurt either.”

I cleaned up the wound and sprayed some of the cleaning solution on it causing Dean to wince. It made me laugh because of how soft he had become in the last year. After rewrapping the wound in a proper bandage, I threw everything else away and put the first aid kit back in its rightful spot. When I looked back at him, I saw that he was staring at his hands.

“Are you thinking about leaving Lisa and Ben?” I asked, returning to the table.

“I’m not sure,” he stated, “if I leave them, more monsters could show up looking for me and hurt them, but if I stay then even more monsters will show up and hurt them to get to me.”

“But at least you’d be there to protect them.”

His perfect, bright green eyes met my own darker, emerald ones.

“If you left Lisa and Ben today, then you would never be able to forgive yourself if they got hurt without you being there. However, I know, and Lisa knows, that you would do anything for the people you love. So maybe you being there is what’s best right now.”

The words seemed to sink in before he nodded in agreement.

“Then it’s settled. I’ll be going back with Lisa and Ben when they wake up.”

I squeezed his shoulder and sat down at the table. Running a shaking hand through my hair as a soft sigh left my lips. I don’t know what came over me, all of a sudden I felt that maybe I should say something to him if this was the last time I’d see him. I had no intention of breaking him and Lisa up but I couldn’t keep it to myself anymore. It was practically tearing me up inside.

“Dean, there’s something I need to tell you before you go,” I whispered.

“What is it?” He asked, his eyes never wavering away from me.

My palms felt sweaty and my throat felt drier than I had ever felt before. Taking a deep breath, I faced him and smiled. I chickened out.

“I’m going to miss you.”

I went to go back to my room, but Dean grabbed my wrist stopping me from leaving. I clenched my fist tight and turned around, not ready to face him because I knew he could read my face like a book. He stood there holding my arm, not tight but not lightly so I would stay there.

“That’s definitely not what you were going to say,” he said, “tell me.”

With a final deep breath, I nodded my head, “I love you.”

His eyes widened and he dropped my hand, letting it drop to my side. I felt it sway before coming to a slow stop. Then I held it to defend myself.

“I’m not saying this to break you and Lisa up,” I said, “I want you to go with her and be there for Ben. But I also wanted to let you know, in case we never saw each other again.”

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” He croaked, and I thought that I could see tears in his eyes.

I could only shrug my shoulders, “with everything going on, it just didn’t feel right. And then you wanted to go live with Lisa after Sam was gone so I just never told you.”

Our conversation was interrupted by Ben and Lisa running into the kitchen, Bobby walking behind them, and embracing Dean. They were happy that he had come home with hardly any injuries. Dean wrapped his arms around them both but he was staring at me. I smiled sweetly, holding my hands in front of me while watching them be reunited. Lisa and Ben were ready to go home with Dean, and even though I knew Dean wanted to stay and talk more about what I had just confessed, I helped push him out the door. If he stayed any longer, I was definitely going to want him to stay forever. But I couldn’t be selfish. Sam, Bobby, and I stood at the front door and waved as the three of them drove off. When they were out of sight, my hand dropped. I felt Bobby place his hand on my shoulder and look at me with understanding.

I wasn’t sure when the next time I would see Dean again, but I knew that it wasn’t going to be any time soon. And if I was being honest, I didn’t want to see him again. He needed to be with Lisa.

#dean winchester #dean #supernatural #spn #dean winchester x female!reader #dean x reader #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester one shot #supernatural one shot #supernatural imagines #dean winchester fanfiction #fluff #dean winchester fluff #imagines #one shot #fanfic #dean winchester x reader #smut #supernatural fluff

95 notes · View notes

valarhalla · 5 years

Text

People have been nagging me to share “the curry story” on here for ages, so alright, I’ll do it. (If you’re Indian and reading this, I am so sorry).

I swear to god, everything I am about to say in this story is true.

When I was eleven, I moved to a small town in rural England and acquired a new best friend at school. Her at that point seemingly-very-normal-parents- nice suburban house, three kids, trampoline in the backyard- invited me over for dinner, and said they were making curry and rhubarb crumble.

“Curry and rhubarb crumble”. Never in the history of mankind have words been so untrue.

The “curry” consisted of, I swear I am not making this up, a vague mixture of * deep breath, oatmeal, tofu sausages, corn, tomato juice, chopped onions, raisins, “leftover broccoli leaves”, kale, and scrambled eggs. The only spice in it was the tiniest smidgen of turmeric. All these ingredients were vaguely stirred together, undercooked, and stuck under a broiler for ten minutes.

They gave me a massive portion. I somehow, I still don’t know how, was polite enough to finish it.

“I’m done,” I said.

“No,” said her father. “In this house, we LICK our plates clean.”

He did. They didn’t make me hold it up and lick it like they all did, but they did make me clean the plate with a piece of bread and my fork until they were satisfied.

Desert came. The rhubarb crumble was entirely unsweetened. Not so much as a raisin. I can’t remember what the crumble part was, because my mind is still haunted by the memory of being forced to eat an entire bowl of unsweetened rhubarb. You know in old Looney Tunes when characters would be tricked into eating allum and their heads would shrink? That’s what eating it felt like. They made me clean my bowl of that too, and wouldn’t let me leave the table until I finished.

The next time, (I was in middle school and as yet too polite to turn down my best friend’s parents) they made “spaghetti and meatballs and salad”. The spaghetti was utterly plain and so undercooked it was crunchy, the “meatballs” consisted of a single large orb of some grey material i have yet to identify, and the salad was, i shit you not, limp boiled lettuce. Crunchy spaghetti, unidentified lumpy grey stuff, and boiled lettuce.

The fascinating thing is that, while yes, these people were obviously health nuts, it was so much more than that. They were health nuts who also cooked like aliens who had never seen human food before. Or like small children making “potions”. One of the more edible things they served to me once was a dessert they made up which consisted of halved apples rolled in cornflour with some milk poured on top. One time, they were convinced to make pizza as a treat. They decided to put an onion on it. Fair and fine, you’d think. Not in that house. They just cut the onion in half once, and stuck each unchopped half facedown on one side of the pizza.

Speaking of onions, one time, my friend decided to make a banana and yoghurt smoothie. Her dad came in, said it wasn’t healthy enough, and made her add an onion to it.

They had a homemade cereal I thankfully was able to opt out of trying which 100% looked like the contents of a vacuum bag. I still have no idea what it contained.

Amazingly, it was by no means just me who experienced this. It was a small town, and every girl in it my age had a selection of horror stories about being invited to dinner at this friend’s house in the exact same ritualistic horror-film fashion. We used to sit around comparing them at sleepovers. Age did not exempt you. One time, this friend’s six year old brother had a friend over for dinner at the same time, poor soul. His mom arrived to pick him up, and wasn’t allowed to take him home until he finished whatever crime against cooking was on the menu that night.

Every story was the same. The ritual that never varied. Every time, these people would make a huge fanfare out of inviting you over for dinner, act all hospitable and excited, set the table, and then serve you a massive helping of the worst food in the world, and make you clean your plate of it, desert included. Who the hell forces you to finish your DESERT?

It’s a mystery to me. They clearly had SOME degree of self-awareness, because after I came to my senses and started coming up with excuses to avoid eating at their house they would tease me saying things like “ohoho, you don’t like LIKE our food do you”. If they had been a bit more fun and less generally puritanical sort of people, I could totally believe this was a family trolling activity where they secretly schemed to come up with the worst possible dishes, secretly filmed themselves forcing people to eat them and watched it and laughed afterwards, I could believe it.

All I’m saying is I’m pretty sure they weren’t aliens, but the more I type this out, the more tempted I am to believe it. Fuck it, maybe they WERE aliens.

45K notes · View notes

slashersins · 4 years

Note

Hi, I love your work, I do not know if it is too much to ask but could make my request if it is possible Brahms fall in love with The Os who is friends with Greta?Where the S/O went to help Greta in her work too and because she was worried about her sanity (she knows about the things that happened at the beginning of the film).Note: The S/O has a personality almost of a mother/sacred person (attentive, affectionate and patient will also buy from an angel).

this is . . . an amazing request . oh my god i’m so pumped , i’ll be more than happy to make this happen !

hi , I love your work , i do not know if it is too much to ask but could make my request if it is possible brahms fall in love with the s/o who is friends with greta ? where the s/o went to help Greta in her work too and because she was worried about her sanity ( she knows about the things that happened at the beginning of the film ) . note : the s/o has a personality almost of a mother/sacred person ( attentive , affectionate and patient ) .

saving grace .

part one .

( part two ) ( part three ) ( part four ) ( part five )

greta needed you . plain and simple . you hadn’t wanted her to go to england . at least not alone , even if it was for a baby sitting job with amazing pay . it’s not that you didn’t trust her , you were just worried . she’d been through so much recently . and she was your best friend . so no sooner did greta call and tell you of her troubles did you bye a ticket and board a plane . greta needed you .

the happy , relieved laughter that left not only you but greta when she opened the door to you seemed to echo in the quiet of the estate . and oh , it felt like forever before you let go of hugging each other . but once you pulled away and took in the state of your friend did your inner mother hen come out . cupping greta’s face you looked over her , sighing and taking her inside .

“ have you been sleeping ? eating ? what’s been going on ? tell me more about it ? do you think this place is haunted or that your just too lonely ? you should have called sooner , you know i would of been down here so fast . ” you may have no idea where anything was in this house , but that didn’t stop you from making yourself busy around the kitchen you stepped into with greta . the first thing in order was making food and something to drink .

greta couldn’t help but laugh as you fussed over her , it was refreshing after the happenings she’d been dealing with . and she relaxes for the first time in weeks , opening up with more ease than she could with malcolm about everything happening .

“ and if i don’t follow the rules , it get’s worse . ” greta took on a nervous tone , glancing just outside the kitchen where a chair sat with the doll you’d yet to be introduced to . greta was nervous to even have him near you , but technically a rule was being broken , so you only hoped that introducing you to the haunted doll would help lessen the tantrum and disturbances to come .

still fussing over the hot stove top , you hummed in acknowledgement , glancing back a moment to give a soft smile , “ then i guess i’m gonna have to follow these rules too ? since i’m staying . and i am staying . you’re not doing this on your own anymore , greta . it’s taking too much out of you . no if ands or buts , okay ? ” you try to follow her gaze , but your place in the kitchen didn’t allow you to see what it was your friend was looking at .

“ you okay , greta ? ” the softness and mother like tone of your voice caught her attention and she gave you a soft smile and nod . taking a deep breath , greta stood and walked over , giving your hand a soft squeeze .

“ you’ll need to set the table for three . i’ll go get brahms . ”

believing in ghosts wasn’t something you stuck your nose up to . you never had your own experiences , and had always been interested in other’s stories . so you didn’t doubt anything greta had told you , but you also couldn’t say that it wasn’t some part of distress . either way , you’d trust greta , and treat this haunted doll with seriousness and respect . anything for your friend .

“ y/n , this is brahms . brahms , this is my best friend , y/n . she’s . . . going to be staying with us for a while . . . ” greta’s voice was shaky as she held the porcelain doll in her arms , facing you .

“ it’s nice to meet you brahms . ” you wiped your hand on your apron , cleaning it of cooking before taking the small hand of the doll and shaking it . “ i hope you like mac and cheese ! ” your smile went from the doll to greta before turning back around to finish up the dish .

the rest of the evening went smoothly . rules explained , the uneaten dinner left in the fridge for brahms . greta , holding brahms rather uncomfortably , showed you around the house and tucked him into bed with a good night kiss . the entire thing felt so forced , and you worried all the more for your friend .

no sooner were you locked away in greta’s room and comfortable did the two of you jump onto the bed and cuddle . no doubt greta needed the affection and you were ready to smother her in it . it wasn’t long between talking and laughing and comforting that the pair of you drifted to sleep , unaware of the man in the walls watching with anger .

brahms was angered the moment you’d stepped into his home . greta had only just started following the rules to the letter . and she’d broken them . he wanted to throw a fit . to come out of the walls and chase you away . even now as the pair of you slept in a tangle of limbs his desire to come out the walls and tear you two apart , jealousy fueling him . when he had finally had enough of stewing in his anger in the walls , he left . he’d find a way to get you to leave .

he was careful in how he acted , how he moved the doll around , how he misplaced your things or moved items when you weren’t looking . even going as far as doing so when you were both in the same room with your back turned . it unnerved greta , worried her to no end about your safety . it took no amount of cooing and calming on your part to ease greta . and though you were a bit spooked by everything , and most certainly sure that the doll was in fact haunted , you felt you were handling everything well .

it got on brahms nerves that you didn’t seem as affected as greta had when he’d started acting up like this . every time the doll showed up in the same room , you’d smile and greet it , picking him up and letting him join you in whatever activity you were doing . if he moved things around you’d just sigh and ask brahms to please stop moving your things . there was even a time that you laughed and asked if brahms wanted to play hide and seek . it was irritating that you tried to deflect every move he made . even when the spent time tearing the kitchen apart . all you’d done was sigh , roll up your sleeves , and clean the room before setting down the brahms doll . you’d scolded him , punished him without dinner before bed .

it had completely shocked him . to be reprimanded in such a way . and never once had you raised your voice . he even felt shame at causing you so much trouble , and that shocked him . it even shocked greta when the next morning there was a small apology left outside the room for you .

“ he did it for me once . he left me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich after he threw a fit .does . . . does this mean he’s accepting you ? ” greta sounded hopeful , relieved . this was great . things would get easier now . in a way they already had been getting better and easier . and for once in a long time greta didn’t feel as scared .

greta was so thankful of your presence . especially when you started taking over more duties for brahms , leaving her more free time to talk and flirt with malcolm . it was something that you encouraged , noticing how they looked at each other . it was time for greta to get back out there , and into a healthy relationship .

so when greta asked if you could watch brahms for a day , and possibly into the next morning by yourself , you’d been over the moon and excited . you spent time fussing over greta and helping her prepare for her date , all while holding brahms . you’d made her promise to text you and call you . which she jokingly responded to with a ‘ yes mom ’ that you’d both laughed at as you waved each other goodbye .

“ well brahmsy . . . it’s just you and me . wanna go read a book ? i’ll let you pick ! ” you smiled down at the doll in your arms , happily making your way upstairs to the library . “ what are you in the mood for today ? ” you bounced brahms in your arms , half expecting to hear a reply . sometimes brahms would speak , but he seemed quiet today . “ okay , brahmsy , i’ll close my eyes and you can pick out your book okay ? ” setting him in his favorite chair , you sat across from him on the couch , and closing your eyes .

brahms should have been furious at how greta started ignoring him . he should have thrown so many tantrums . but you’d been distracting him . he wanted to make you leave so he could have greta to himself . she was supposed to be his . his parent’s promised . you weren’t supposed to ever have shown up . it broke the rules . and yet now , for some reason , you were the one he spent most of his time with . the one who followed all the rules . the one who started becoming more of his nanny and less of a house guest .

so instead of getting jealous that greta was going out with the delivery boy and not taking care of him , brahms followed you into the library . carefully , oh so carefully , he moved out of the walls , going to the shelves and quietly picking a book . he re-positioned the doll holding the book before moving back into the walls . “ this one , please ? ” the child’s voice was clear , and you opened your eyes smiling at the doll .

tugging the doll into your lap , you cuddle up and get comfortable in the couch . the book in your hands held so both you and doll brahms could see the pages . brahms was pressed against the wall listening as you read . sometimes you’d stop and ask a question about what he thought of the book . and he’d answer in his child voice , smiling to himself when you seemed happy with his replies .

#brahms heelshire #brahms heelshire x reader #brahms heelshire imagine #slasher x reader #slasher imagine #slashers x reader #slasher #slashers #( asks / answered. )#( there is going to be more )#( i just have to take a break )#( this is gonna be so much fun to finish )#( thank you for this ask )#saving grace

217 notes · View notes

beware-of-you-98 · 4 years

Text

OTP Prompts for Jemily

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Who kills the bugs?

JJ (she grew up in the middle of nowhere Pennsylvania, she’s not scared of any sort of bug)

Emily doesn’t deal with creatures with more than four legs, so if she sees an insect, or lord forbid, a spider, she’ll immediately climb off the floor and call for her girlfriend

JJ can never find it in herself to purposely kill the insects (she’s also not too keen on having to clean bug guts from her carpet), so she’ll grab a clear plastic cup with whatever book or piece of paper is laying around and use those to put the bug outside

(If it’s a wolf spider, she’ll literally pick it up with her bare hands, much to Emily’s horror)

If the spider is a brown recluse or black widow, she’ll bring the covered arachnid closer and take the time to show her boys and Emily what markings to look out for so that they know to be careful

The only insect she refuses to deal with are stink bugs

When they come around, she and Emily take an emergency trip to the nearby Target and buy enough of the raspberry gel air fresheners for every one of their windows

Yeah, their house smells like a Jolly Rancher for the entire month

But at least they don’t have to deal with the annoying beetles

Who always gets hot? Who always gets cold?

Neither of them gets hot, but Emily is perpetually cold

The rest of the team will be in the field in pants and short sleeves while Emily is bundled in her turtlenecks and jacket

Even in 90°+ weather, Emily can sit comfortably in long sleeve shirts and pants

At first, JJ is surprised by how cold Emily can get

She wakes up one day to find Emily bundled under the covers and shivering

Of course, she’s alarmed and asking what’s wrong, only getting confused when Emily says she’s fine, just cold

“Em, it’s 76° outside.” “That’s practically freezing!”

JJ starts giving Emily her sweaters and sweatshirts for her to wear

Emily loves them so much because they fit her just the way she likes and they smell like her girlfriend

Who’s the big spoon? Who’s the little spoon?

Everyone on the team hands down swears Emily’s the big spoon

It’s not only because she’s taller than JJ, but Penelope says she gives big spoon vibes

(Actually, she says Emily gives huge top vibes and that makes her the big spoon by default)

JJ lets the team think whatever they want because she’s the only one that really knows Emily Prentiss is the ultimate little spoon

She can’t help it!! She loves the feeling of being wrapped up in JJ’s arms

And loves getting her hair played with while she rests her head on JJ’s chest

She’s!! Soft!! When!! It!! Comes!! To!! Jennifer!! Jareau!!

When did they realize they loved each other?

For JJ, she realized in the aftermath of the Tobias Hankel case

She suffered from horrific nightmares for weeks and never got enough sleep

Emily comes over every night for three weeks and holds JJ in her arms and comforts her when she wakes up screaming from her nightmares

JJ realizes she’s in love with Emily one night after she’s calmed down from yet another nightmare

She’s laying there in Emily’s arms, emotionally drained and exhausted and she just peers up at Emily and... knows

No one had ever cared for her like this, no one had ever made her feel so calm, so safe in years.

Emily does.

Emily makes her feel like no one has before, like she’s the only person to ever exist and matter.

JJ feels as if Emily’s arms is where she’s meant to spend her life

She doesn’t know it then, but that was the moment she fell in love with Emily. And she fell hard.

Emily knew almost right away tbh

It’s only a few weeks after she joins the BAU and everyone else had gone home except for herself and JJ

She goes into JJ’s office to keep her company

They spend the next few hours organizing files (Emily insists on helping because JJ looks really stressed and overwhelmed)

They don’t get a lot of work done honestly, they sit and talk with each other over mugs of steaming chamomile tea

Emily looks across the desk at JJ as she finishes a story and is rendered speechless by how beautiful the blonde is and how perfect she is and how everything about her makes Emily feel as if nothing else matters

She’s overwhelmed with her own emtion and just knows, knows, at that moment she’s well and truly fucked because she’s in love

Who said “I love you” first?

Emily does but it’s spontaneous and out of the blue

The whole team is hanging out at Rossi’s house

Everyone is laughing and having a good time

Emily and JJ are attempting to dance to the music playing over the speakers but they’re both hilariously uncoordinated

(They’ve also both had a couple of glasses of wine at this point, making their efforts even more comical)

Spencer and Hotch are playing a game of blackjack

Derek is half paying attention to the game on tv, half swaying to the music and doing weird dances when Penelope looks at him to make her laugh

Penelope is recording different parts of the night for the memories

Rossi sits back and watches over his children with a content smile

JJ stumbles into Emily’s arms with a giggle

Emily laughs and wraps her arms around the her blonde and just goes “God, do I love you.”

You can hear a pin drop with how quiet everyone becomes

Emily opens her mouth to apologize, to weakly defend herself when JJ grins up at her “Do you mean it?”

Emily’s response is a small, shy smile

“Say it again.”

Emily then leans in and gives JJ a light kiss and says more genuinely “I love you.”

JJ beams up at her and repeats the words, wrapping her arms around Emily’s neck and pulls her down for a deep kiss

(The team all give out a celebratory whoop at the couple’s expense and Penelope cries because she’s so happy for her friends)

(She sends the video to the two later on for them to have)

(It’s their most treasured memory)

Who demands cuddles?

When sober? Emily

Emily Prentiss loves a good cuddle

And, hey, after a day of dealing with the horrors they experience daily, a cuddle is what they both need and deserve

Drunk JJ is clingy as hell and will literally pout up at Emily until the older woman cuddles her

It doesn’t matter where they are

If they are in the middle of Wendy’s, drunk JJ will pout to her heart’s desire until she gets her cuddles (and a vanilla frosty, but that’s besides the point)

Drunk JJ actually demands cuddles

Who is more prone to stealing the other’s clothes?

While JJ gives Emily her clothes to wear, she is 100% the one that steals Emily’s clothes

She steals Emily’s hoodies all the time

If she can’t find something to wear for work in her side of the closet, she’ll steal a shirt from Emily’s

She also loves to steal Emily’s pantsuits and wear those to work sometimes

They’re so much more comfortable than skirts

And Emily loves to see her in them, so that’s a bonus

(She also steals Emily’s flannels before they go out for dates)

She just loves wearing Emily’s clothes as much as Emily loves to wear her’s

When do they tell their team/their families about their relationship? What are their reactions?

They decide to tell the team after five months that they’ve been dating

They want them to know because the team is like their secondary family

(And they also want to be able to publically be with each other when the team get together at Rossi’s)

(JJ just wants to hold Emily’s hand and give her girlfriend a kiss whenever she wants god dammit!)

To both of their relief, the team’s response is overwhelmingly positive

No one is surprised when they confirm to the team they’re dating

Hotch and Rossi are just like “we knew it”

Penelope has to remind both of them that she already knew because JJ had given Emily a kiss a few weeks ago during girl’s night (Penelope can keep a secret if she really wants to)

Spencer is confused because “Wait, you mean you guys have only just recently become a thing? You haven’t been dating for the past year and a half?”

Derek is just like “Well it’s about fucking time”

JJ takes Emily with her when she takes a weekend trip to take her boys home to visit her mom

She really wants Emily to formally meet her mom (“I know you already met her, but I want her to meet you as my girlfriend!”)

Though initially slightly surprised by JJ introducing Emily as her girlfriend, the blonde’s mother welcomes Emily with open arms

She’s never seen JJ this happy in years and it warms her heart to see her daughter in good hands

(“And she’s really good with the kids,” JJ’s mother tells her daughter later on in the night as the two watch Emily and the boys out in the backyard)

JJ just smiles warmly in response, relieved by her mother’s response

Ambassador Prentiss comes over to Emily’s apartment unannounced while JJ and the boys are having a family movie night

It’s awkward as hell tbh

Emily’s too formal and on edge

JJ longs to go over and place a hand on Emily’s arm for comfort, but stays put under the Ambassador’s steely gaze

(Michael and Henry are blissfully unaware, sucked too far into the animated universe of Spider-Man)

Finally, the Ambassador turns to Emily and asks if she’s happy

Emily turns back to JJ and the boys with a soft gaze before turning back to her mother and giving a light nod “Yeah. I am.”

“Then that’s all that matters.”

All the tension falls from Emily’s shoulders and the biggest breath of relief leaves her lips at that

It’s the most approval she’s gotten from her mother in a long time but it means so much

What is their favorite way to show affection?

Emily likes to wrap her arms around JJ’s waist from behind

She loves to sneak up behind her when she’s cooking and gently grab her waist and press a light kiss against her neck before laying her chin on the blonde’s shoulder and watching her cook

She’ll slide behind JJ on the couch and kiss her temple before they cuddle and watch tv

She’ll randomly stop by and just wrap JJ in a soft, warm hug, gently swaying her from side to side before letting her go and going about her day like normal

JJ loves giving Emily sweet kisses on her forehead or her cheek

She wakes up before Emily and will sometimes be unable to help herself and just lean down and press a series of light kisses on the brunette’s nose or forehead

She’ll sometimes stop by Emily’s office during work and just plant a kiss on the crown of her head before heading back to her reports

When they go on long trips, who drives?

JJ!!

She loves to drive but hardly ever gets to

At work, Emily or one of the boys are the ones driving the SUVs

(And, yeah, maybe she got to drive the SUV when Kate was on the team, but still)

Even running errands like going to the store or picking up the boys, it’s Emily that drives

But Emily hates to drive long distances and often leaves that task to JJ

JJ loves it

Emily will lean her head on her shoulder or place her hand over the blonde’s on the gear shift

It’s so blissfully domestic and soft and makes the drive that much better

Who shows more affection to the other in public?

JJ easily

Emily is a firm believer that she has a hardass reputation to uphold

It takes all of JJ’s will power not to snort

Because, honestly, Emily is really just a big softie

But she’ll let Emily think what she wants

She’s the one that initiates hand holding on the jet when they’re going to a case and cuddles on the way home from one

She just wants to love her girlfriend anywhere and at anytime!

If she wants to give Emily a kiss in the middle of the bullpen (when it’s slow and the atmosphere isn’t as tense or serious as it normally is, of course), she will god dammit!!

(Emily’s light blush never does any good to help uphold her “hardass reputation” but oh well)

Who gives piggy back rides the most?

JJ gives the piggy back rides, Emily always gets them

JJ holds her as if she weighs nothing and it makes her swoon

JJ’s arms? A definite weakness for Emily

(Plus she never got to have piggy back rides as a child and JJ insists on making up for lost time so how can Emily refuse with an offer like that?)

Who proposes first? How and when?

Okay so I’m a firm believer that they’re both spontaneous as hell when it comes to this kind of thing

It’s literally just a matter of who lets their guard down first and let the question slip out first

If it’s JJ, it’s when she comes down one morning to see Emily and the boys making her breakfast

She just stops and leans in the doorway, smiling to herself as her girlfriend instructs her sons what do do

Emily is so patient with them

She helps Michael crack the eggs into a bowl and then kisses his nose, which makes him squeal in delight and her to grin

Henry stirs the batter for waffles and gets flour on his glasses and face

Emily leans over and gently cleans him off, grinning and laughing in surprise when the young boy gets batter on her nose

The three of them are just laughing and genuinely having a good time and, god, it makes JJ’s heart feel so full

When they finally notice JJ in the doorway, the boys run up and give her good morning kisses before going back to cooking breakfast

When JJ and Emily are alone and cleaning up the kitchen, Emily just wraps her arms around JJ’s waist and gives her the softest of kisses

The “marry me?” slips from JJ’s lips without much thought

And Emily, though initially surprised, just beams in response and gives her girlfriend (fiancé?) a deep, passionate kiss and just goes “just let me know the date to reserve, baby”

If it’s Emily, it happens in a very soft, very intimate moment between the two of them

They’ll be laying in bed at midnight, cuddled naked under the covers with no space between them

Emily leans over and brushes her fingers through JJ’s long hair, her heart fluttering wildly when the blonde looks up at her

Her eyes are full of so much love, her expression so soft and adoring, Emily can’t help but to whisper out “marry me?” into the room

She goes to maybe to start a speech about their relationship, how much it means to her and how much she wants to be a part of JJ’s and the boys’ lives but all that comes out is “I just... I really, really love you and want to be a part of your life permanently.”

Just like the first time they admitted they loved each other, JJ beams and leans in, pressing a chaste kiss to Emily’s lips before telling her to say it again

Emily presses a kiss to JJ’s chin and asks again so softly “marry me?”

JJ pulls her in for a long, deep kiss

“I’d marry you as soon as tomorrow if you wanted me to.”

213 notes · View notes

electrictoes · 3 years

Text

Light the Dark

For @dailysvu‘s Sonny Carisi Appreciation Week

Prompt: Day 6: Nightmare

When Sonny is eight he starts getting a recurring nightmare. It’s an awful, twisted memory of the summer just gone by.

The dream starts just like his memory. They’re at the beach. Mama left Teresa in charge while she went back to their rented beach house to start cooking dinner; Daddy - Dad, Sonny corrects himself in his memory, he’s not a baby anymore - has gone into town to get their fourth of July fireworks; Sonny had asked to go with him but Dad said he had to look after your sisters, Junior.

Teresa isn’t doing a very good job of being in charge; she’s sunbathing with one eye open so she can check if the lifeguard is watching her. The lifeguard isn’t watching Teresa because he’s watching two older girls sunbathing up the beach, but since Teresa’s about to start high school she doesn’t much listen to anything Sonny has to say. She calls him Dominick like Sonny is a baby name and tells him to go away.

Gina’s made friends with some other kids. She does that everywhere they go; she's playing volleyball and ignoring her brother and sisters. And so it’s just Sonny and Bella.

The problem is Bella can’t swim. She thinks she can but she’s no good at it. Dad says she’s gonna have to learn because they live on an island, but Mama says it doesn’t really count. In Sonny’s real memory when Bella runs into the sea and gets caught in a wave he’s quick - he swims right out after her because the lifeguard is still not watching the ocean, and he swallows so much water he’s still coughing it up hours later, but he manages to grab hold of Bella before she goes under the water - and the bigger kids Gina's been playing with see them, and they swim out to help them back to shore. Teresa yells at Sonny and Bella, and then Mama yells at Teresa, and then Dad yells at everyone.

In his real memory he wakes up in the middle of the night and his chest still feels tight from all the coughing, but when he opens his eyes and looks across the little room he’s sharing with Bella, she’s fast asleep with her bunny rabbit tucked up under her head and he knows she’s okay.

That’s not what happens in the nightmare.

In the nightmare when the wave gets Bella he’s not quick enough. There aren’t any bigger kids nearby and he sees Bella slip under the water before he can reach her. In the nightmare he tries to get to her but everything goes black, and cold, and he can feel hands on his legs dragging him down, down, down into the water.

When he wakes up he screams. Screams loud enough to wake the whole house up and the first time it happens Dad comes running in with a baseball bat like he’s going to beat Sonny’s nightmare with it. Mama’s right behind him, and when Dad drops the bat she pushes past him, sitting on Sonny’s bed and brushing his sweat soaked hair back from his forehead. She kisses him and asks him what happened while Dad sends the girls back to bed.

He doesn’t stop getting the nightmare for almost a full year - a year of his parents whispering things like therapy when they think he’s not listening, of Mama soothing his tears and kissing his hair, of Dad telling him it’s time to grow up a little, and Gina saying he’s too old to be this dumb. Dad only lets him get in their bed the first couple of times - after that he says Sonny’s got to learn to manage. Sometimes when he wakes up from the nightmare he sneaks across the hall to remind himself that Bella’s okay, and if she spies him she’ll creep past Gina’s bed to give him a hug. She tells him he’s the best big brother in the world and he swells with pride every time, even though Bella only has one big brother so she wouldn’t know any different.

He gets the nightmare occasionally for the next couple of years, but as the memory of that day at the beach fades, so do the dreams; by the time he’s in middle school he’s stopped getting nightmares altogether. At least until Bobby Bianchi decides to use his head as a wrecking ball.

The cuts and bruises heal much faster than the rest of him. He has nightmares about Bobby Bianchi for far longer than he ever had nightmares about that day at the beach. Sometimes the two nightmares combine and the hands that are dragging Sonny down to the ocean floor belong to Bobby; the cruel way he’d laughed as Sonny fell to the ground echoing in his ears.

His father had been so disappointed in the aftermath of the window incident that Sonny doesn’t dare tell him about the nightmares. He doesn’t tell his mom either, because she was already so worried about him, had struggled to hold back tears as she helped clean his blood away. He doesn’t tell anyone - not even Bella - because the first time he’s ripped from sleep by the nightmare he can hear his parents talking quietly downstairs - he tiptoes down carefully, just wanting the comfort of seeing his mom even though he’s too old to ask for a hug, for her to tuck him back into bed.

He stops three steps from the bottom of the stairs when he hears his name, and he listens with his fists clenched, his bottom lip between his teeth. “He’s too sensitive,” Dad is saying, “That’s why these kids pick on him.”

“Dominick, that’s not fair,” Mom says back in a hushed whisper, “We raised him to be a good kid, a sweet, kind child. That doesn’t mean that-” he hears his mother choke on her words, can tell that she’s crying, and he takes a guilty step back up the stairs, shuffling away but staying in earshot as his father comforts her.

“He’s gonna be just fine,” his dad says, “But we’ve gotta toughen him up a bit. It’s my fault, three sisters, I should’ve seen this coming. I’ll speak with him.”

Sonny slips back into his own bed and holds his anxieties in, keeps his nightmares to himself.

Two days later his dad sits him down - man to man - and talks to him about toughening up a little, growing a thicker skin. He asks again who pushed Sonny through the window and Sonny knows he’s disappointed when he doesn’t get an answer. He swallows down his fear, his discomfort, and tells his father he’ll handle it. It’s years before they’re back on the same page again.

When the nightmares come he holds back screams, buries his tears in his pillow as he cries himself to sleep. His mother frets - thinks he’s not sleeping enough, staying up too late - he’s not eating properly, she says, shuffling him into the kitchen, making him stand by her side as she prepares spaghetti sauce and meatballs and a dozen other recipes he commits to memory watching her hands move, waiting for her to shove a plate in front of him to reassure herself she’s doing something to help.

After a time, much like before, the nightmares trickle away. Never entirely, though. It’s long after middle school that he stops dreaming about Bobby Bianchi - though the nightmares don’t bite at his adult self in the same way, he’s still thrown awake well into his college years, that laughter ringing in his ears.

Becoming a police officer, then a detective, he sees things. Sometimes he sees the worst of humanity and it can leave him fraught, on edge. He’s worked hard at setting his emotions aside at the end of the day, but there are some sights you can’t unsee, and some images that won’t leave his head. When he closes his eyes at night there are cases that haunt him, that have him waking up in a cold sweat and struggling to catch his breath.

Early on he gets a domestic disturbance call that he’ll remember for the rest of his life - Ellen Carter’s face lingers in his mind, the way he had tried to persuade her to get out of that house, leave her husband. The way she looked, blooded and beaten, her skull smashed in and her body slumped over by the wall. He wakes up every night for a week with the image of her eyes in his head and he has to shake himself, roll over and try and get back to sleep. His sergeant tells him he looks like hell, that whatever’s going on in his personal life he can’t bring it to work with him. It’s like he’s desensitised, and Sonny will take the dark nights over that any day.

He makes detective and he works homicide. It’s worse. There’s not just one Ellen Carter, there’s dozens. It gets harder and harder and though he doesn’t have any one recurring nightmare, he never goes long between episodes of waking up and remembering their faces.

So he moves to SVU - he wants to make a difference before it’s too late. But SVU brings its own dark cases, it’s own haunting images. It’s at SVU that he starts to pick up real nightmares again, not just flickering images. The cases and the heartbreak, they still get him, but it’s his own experiences that follow him into his dreams.

He takes Mike Dodds’ death hard and it’s the first time in years that he’s had the kind of nightmares that dig deep into his consciousness. He replays his imagined memory of the scene in his head - the way Mike got shot, how he faded from life; and some nights it isn’t Mike - some nights Sonny’s the one who got shot and he’s lying bleeding on the ground and plunged into darkness, unseen hands grasping at him. Those nightmares are hard - but the kind that leave him biting back a scream are the nightmares where Mike is replaced with someone else - with Fin, or Olivia, or Amanda, and those dreams having him clawing at his bedsheets, grabbing at his phone on the nightstand, his thumb inches away from calling to check in - to reassure himself that they’re okay.

He only make a call once, and only because he has a text from Amanda sent thirty minutes before - Jesse’s cutting a new tooth and it’s keeping both her and Amanda awake. He’s breathless when he greets her, enough that she catches it even over the phone.

“Carisi? Where are you?”

“In bed,” he says, sitting upright, a hand in his damp hair, heart still hammering in his chest.

Amanda’s suspicious, and he’d laugh if he wasn’t already so off-kilter, “Why are you calling me from your bed?”

“I- I can’t sleep,” he admits.

“Are you okay?”

There’s something about the way her tone shifts - something about Amanda Rollins in general - that makes it easy for him to tell her. Maybe in person he would hold back a little more, but she can’t see his face and he’s still shaking, “I- not really. I’ve been havin’-”

“Nightmares?” she finishes, her voice soft down the line. It’s the first time since he was nine years old that he’s let someone else into this part of his life. “You wanna talk about it?”

“Nah,” he says, and he means it - just knowing he’s told her is soothing in itself, “I just- wanted to know you an’ Jesse were okay.”

She hums down the phone, offers to distract him, and he falls asleep sometime later to the sound of Amanda settling Jesse. He sleeps through the rest of the night. The dreams don’t go away altogether, but they fade with time.

When Tom Cole puts a gun to Sonny’s head it ends with him dead on the floor, Sonny spattered with his blood, and he keeps it together. In the dark of his bedroom hours later he awakes choking with fear. He had thought his number was up, and that feeling doesn’t go away, not for months.

There are other incidents, too - when Tom Williams falls to his death before Sonny can pull him back over the railings, when Jules Hunter is killed in a deliberate car crash - case after case, victim after victim. Things that happen to his friends and colleagues too - when Barba gets death threats, when Noah is kidnapped, when Liv is held hostage, and when Bucci takes Amanda. He puts so much energy into moving on, focusing on other things, that it’s only natural the thoughts he doesn’t process creep into his dreams.

He handles it though - the dreams never become what they were when he was a child, never take over his sleep every night. He doesn’t need to be comforted, has learned to shrug them off and go back to sleep. He almost always only gets those kind of dreams when he is alone, and on the rare occasions there is another body beside him in his bed when he sits bolt upright, shaking with terror, he always downplays it - a bad dream, something that happened on a case once. Nothing to worry about.

It’s almost cruel that his old dream comes back to haunt him just as his waking life becomes everything he’s wanted it to be for so long. The first time he startles awake in Amanda’s bed he hopes it’s a fluke - just one of those days something in his subconscious has triggered this old memory. When Amanda blinks up at him, he tells her he’s fine - says he woke up with heartburn though he knows she doesn’t believe him. He doesn’t want to tell her what happened in his dream - the way it wasn’t Bella being swept under the waves, but Jesse. The way it wasn’t him being dragged down but Amanda.

After the third night in a row of the old nightmare twisting - this time it’s Billie being caught in the waves, Sonny unable to catch her in time - the third night of Amanda catching him awake, a new excuse on his tongue each time - a distraction in the form of his mouth on hers, his hands sliding beneath the blankets; losing himself in her at the same time he steers her away from what had woken him - Sonny decides to sleep alone, to go back to his own apartment and hope this string of nightmares run their course.

It doesn’t help. Two nights without Amanda and he’s had even less sleep than the three previous.

She frowns at him over his office desk as she hands him a coffee, and she takes the seat opposite without him offering. “Alright, Counsellor, what’s going on?”

“What? Nothing.”

“Are you gonna come home with me tonight?” she asks, leading him into the conversation.

He shrugs, “I don’t know, I- I got a lot to catch up on.”

“I’d say you were avoiding me,” she says, leaning forward on his desk, “But I don’t think that’s it.”

He shakes his head, “Never.”

“So if it’s not me, then what? The girls?”

“No,” he insists, surprised she’d even suggest it, “I thought you might want some space.”

“And instead of asking me you go home alone and what - lie awake all night? Because you look like you haven’t slept in a minute,” she reaches across the table, curling her fingers around his, “Carisi, what is it?”

“I’ve just been- I didn’t wanna keep wakin’ you up.”

“You know,” she says, her thumb rubbing back and forth across his hand, “I get nightmares too.”

He sighs, hesitating before telling her the whole story, starting with his original nightmare and talking her through his recent dreams - the conversation takes far longer than either of their lunch breaks should have, but once he starts talking he can’t seem to stop, after holding all of this in for as long as he has.

The nightmares don’t just stop. Being in love with Amanda Rollins makes almost all of Sonny’s life a little brighter, brings a little more light into his days and his nights, but love isn’t a cure all and childhood night terrors don’t go away just because your days are filled with happiness - with sleepy morning kisses, children giggling over breakfast, and sneaking coffee breaks together - with Amanda’s head against his chest on the couch, the way Jesse has started to copy the things he says while they cook, and the times Billie falls asleep on his knee before he’s even halfway through her bedtime story - the nights still grow dark.

The difference now - the difference from every nightmare he’s had since he was nine years old - is that when he wakes gasping into the night, unwanted images assaulting his dreams and corrupting his memories, there’s a soft voice in his ear, and arms curled around him; there are reassurances and promises and hands holding his.

His nightmares slip away after a few weeks - not gone forever, but they become less frequent, less draining. Amanda gets nightmares too - he soothes her through them just as tenderly as she does for him. They’ve both seen things. They both have memories they wish they didn’t. But they have each other.

#carisi week #svu #svu fic #rollisi fic #rollisi #sonny carisi #my fic

21 notes · View notes

oddduckthatgirl · 4 years

Text

A Smooth Sea Never Made a Good Sailor

A/N: just a little Henry x Reader for you all. Comfort and Fluff abound. Anything in italics in the readers inner monologue.

I don’t know if it’s any good but it’s getting me through a weird head space. Anyway, Part one below.

You blink into the dim room . You hadn’t slept at all. You’d think fourteen hours flying would wear you out. Guess not. Or the very warm, very loving man who had you pulled to his body could at least convince your brain to shut off.

Henry. Your anchor. The true north in a polarizing world.

You tried to let his warmth drag you under and keep you grounded. Not let that voice in your head win. You tried to shut it out as you looked at Henry’s peaceful face. You run your fingers through his hair and he sighs in his sleep. The dim light hits the diamond on your finger. The symbol of his promise of a future so brilliant and beautiful. He’s everything you’d ever dreamed of.

-How could anyone dream about you? You’re so broken. All he’s going to do is spend the time putting you back together. What a life. Who wants a wife they have to worry with constantly? Henry’s going to wake up one day soon and realize the mistake he’s made.-

You squeezed your eyes shut hoping to silence the doubt. But you felt the shift in your body. You couldn’t just lay here and let it win. You didn’t want to wake him just to have him piece you back together. You could do this yourself.

You slip carefully out of his arms. You notice a small frown on his face but surely it’s more because you moving made him uncomfortable. You wait until his expression relaxes and you find his discarded hoodie and slip it on.

As you try to make a quiet exit, you’re almost foiled by the Akita alarm. Kal sits up almost to say “and where do you think you’re going? You reach down and scratch behind his ears which seems to be enough for him to lay back down. Thank god; all you need is to wake Henry.

-That’s it. Just go. He didn’t even wake up. That’s how tired he is from taking care of you. This whole time you were back in the states was probably a vacation for him. -

You ran your hands over the kitchen counters. Then the sink. Cleaning always helped. If everything was perfect, then nothing could be wrong. The doubt wouldn’t be right about you.

Then your mom’s words came to mind “well it’s not like you’re the world's greatest cook. And you’re not exactly a cuddler. And he wants a family...you always said you weren’t cut out to be a parent. You think all that’s changed since you met him. He’s a nice man. He brings so much to your relationship. What do you bring?”

Order. Balance. Service. Effort. Love. That’s what you brought. If she could see these counters she’d see how perfect you can make it.

You got lost in the sound of grit of the cleanser against the surface of the sink. The water rinsing away the traces of the grime. You wanted to feel that sense of clean; the doubt to rinse away. Maybe that’s why his voice scared you.

“Darling, why aren’t you in bed? You must be exhausted. I felt you tossing before I must have drifted off.”

You took a deep breath to ground yourself before you turned to face him. You put the biggest smile on your face, “ oh I got a little nap in.”

Liar.

“you looked so peaceful I didn’t want to wake you.”

He raised an eyebrow and walked toward you. You could feel your heart pounding as he looked at the counters. You tried to remain calm while he got himself some water. His eyes stayed on your face while he drank.

He knows. Everyone does. Broken, scared little girl.

“Are you okay Y/N?”

No, I’m swirling into a pit of despair. I just can’t say it. You’re probably tired of saving me, “I’m okay. Just the jet lag, you know. Makes me a little uh…..disoriented.”

He leans against the perfect counter, “you’re sure?”

Fuck no I’m not. It hurts to breathe and I need….something. Anything. Just don’t see me cry, “yeah. I’m good. Glad to be here. Really.”

He tilts his head in question.

Please let it go Henry, you silently beg. You’re hanging on by a thread. But you can get it sorted. You can do it yourself.

He carefully closes the space between you. He gently holds your face in his hands and rubs his thumbs over your cheek bones, “It is good to have you home,” he kisses your forehead and just above a whisper speaks, “tell me what’s going on in there. We both know you’re not okay.”

You close your eyes so they don’t betray you, “really. I’m just….” you grip his wrists to hold yourself in the moment.

“Y/N,” his fingers tracing small circles along your neck, “I’m right here.”

You feel one hot tear slip down your cheek. The crack in your armor exposed, you open your eyes and meet his blue ones.

The ones that you can see all the love for you in. All the concern. Wonder. Hurt. You can’t hold it now.

-There you go again. Weak pathetic girl. Go ahead. Let him resent you more. Bet he leaves you to wallow. Right here, you mean in his house. You’re a guest in his life.-

You can’t even recognize the sound you make. Something like a whimper. Your chin quivering as the tears fall. It’s like they’re searing into your skin, “I’m sorry,” escapes your lips between the sobs now taking over you. You feel like you could drift away at any moment, out into the expanse.

But you weren’t. Strong, steady arms held you against the waves of fear and panic. You clung to his body. There was no other safe harbor. The waves were too rough and threatened to pull you apart. Your hands clutching around his back, holding on for dear life.

“I’ve got you, love,” his hands smoothing over your back as the sobs wrack your body, “I’m here,” he pulls your head firmly against his chest, “let it out.”

The wailing sobs come forward. You’re not even sure you’re saying words. Your body aches. Your legs feel as though they can’t hold up. Your head hurts.

“Ssshhh now,” his soft sure voice reaches your ringing ears, “it’s alright,” the grip on your waist tightening. He won’t let you fall. He’s showing you how true that is, “just breathe Y/N.”

He cradles your head against his chest and you try to fight,” I…..hurts…..can’t,” broken words cried out between tears. Your body wants to push away.

His hold around your waist even more firm,”I know sweetheart. But you can. Just, try for me….please,”

-God, now he’s begging you to do a basic function and you can’t even get that right.-

Doubt screaming in your brain. Your ragged gasps for air can’t drown it out. The heat is overwhelming your body. The burning flames of it will surely cut the ties that keep you here.

Then there’s sudden cool running down your neck and now sliding down your back. Henry’s hands dripping with water trying to soothe you, “y/n listen to me, you’re getting overheated and starting to hyperventilate,” calm reasonable Henry, “ I can do a great deal of things for you but I can’t breathe for you. Please my love, listen to my voice.”

You grab his forearm weakly. You can’t raise your head. It’s too heavy. Your vision is out of focus. You close your eyes to try and focus. The feel of plush cushions beneath you forces you to open your eyes. Henry is kneeling in front of you. He had sat you down on the couch.

He shifts his hold to your neck. He puts his thumbs under your chin and lifts your head, “don’t try and speak. Catch your breath. I’ll catch the rest.”

And just like that the world stopped. Your eyes focus for a moment on his face. He doesn’t look angry or burdened. It’s nothing but concern. You slide your hands along his arms, physically anchored to him. You nod your head and try to take a full breath.

The sound of your breathing begins to drown out the doubt. The warmth of Henry’s hands make you aware of where you are.

“That’s it,” his voice barely above a whisper, “come back to me.”He wipes away the tears still wet on your cheeks.

You take a full breath. Your vision focuses and there’s quiet. You don’t trust your voice to be loud or full sentences. You drag your hands up his arms, along his neck and to his face. “Home,” is all you can manage.

He watches you as he pulls his hands away. He slides them to yours and takes your hands in his, “yes my love it is,” he kisses each of your knuckles. He can’t help but smile at your ring, “let’s go get you some water. Can you stand?”

You nod and let him help you to your feet. Your legs are still weak but you can move on your own. He still supports your body and keeps an eye on you. You lean against the counter top. He hands you a glass with a silent request.

“Not too quickly now y/n. Don’t want to make yourself sick,” he watches you for any sign of trouble. He pushes a stray section of your hair away from your face, “that’s my girl.”

He takes the empty glass from your hands and places it in the sink. He looks you over, tracing the dark circles under your eyes with his thumbs before he pulls you against him. He kisses the top of your head and runs his hand up and down your back, “you haven’t slept at all have you?”

“No,” you sniffle and rub your cheek against his chest. Your hands locked around him. You aren’t entirely sure you can completely hold yourself up now. The exhaustion is taking over every inch of your body. You just hope you can sleep before you’re too weak to fight off the darkness that is still lurking in your mind.

“Let’s get you to bed sweetheart. I have to insist you try to get a couple of hours in,” he can feel you sigh heavily against him.

“But bed is so far away,” you whine.

Without warning, Henry places his hands under your thighs and pulls your legs up to his waist. You lock your ankles around him and he holds you, “I’ve got you,” he whispers into your hair and he walks back up to your bedroom.

You feel your eyes sting with tears thinking of how many times just in the past few moments he’s shown you how much he has you. His love and dedication make your chest hurt.

“But for how long?”

He sits you down on the bed, covers still in disarray from earlier. Kal has since joined him at the side of the bed. You meet his eyes again and you feel the tears slip down your cheeks; in this state you can’t hold it in.

He wipes away the tears with his thumbs as he kneels before you, “what do you mean for how long?”

Your breath catches. Doubt apparently had taken over even your voice. You try and find the words to tell him what was going on. Your mouth opens but no sounds come out. It’s frustrating and terrifying to want to say it all but you can’t.

He sits down behind you and pulls you against him, “Kal, up with mum please,” a giant ball of fur and love is now pushed against your legs. Henry wraps his arms around yours letting you snake between his so you can feel him around you. He hooks his legs over your hips, grounding you to him and the bed. He can feel your breathing start to hitch.

“Y/N, none of that now,” he coos at you, “I’m right here with you and I will be for the rest of our lives,” he moves the ring on your finger, “in a few short months I’ll make that vow publicly and proudly,” he squeezes you softly so you can feel pressure all over your body.

You swallow down the sob but the tears still fall. You let your head fall back into his shoulder. You can feel the gentle rise and fall of his chest and the steady rhythm of his heart through your own body. You try to focus on him and do as he does.

He rests his chin on top of your head and gently rocks the two of you, “just try and relax now. You’re far too upset for anything you try to say make sense. We can talk later, I promise. Everything will be alright, my sweet girl.”

You don’t even have the energy to make a sound. Instead you close your eyes and let the tears come at will. Even with the roaring tide of doubt and fear, you’re still anchored to the shore. You’re home; safe. You feel soft blankets against your heated skin as a small grunt of discomfort escapes from you.

“Ssssshhhh,” he kisses your forehead, then traces your eyebrows with his fingers, a gesture you had told him calmed you as a little girl. You pulled yourself closer to him and felt the heaviness of sleep start to pull you to it.

When you open your eyes again, you find yourself alone in bed but firmly tucked in. You check the time and find it’s been nearly three hours. The smell of something being broiled fills your nose. Vaguely you can hear Henry talking which you assume means he and Kal are doing their utmost to help you feel better.

You manage to pull yourself out of bed; heaviness in every muscle as you head toward the sound of Henry’s voice. You decide to be as quiet as possible in hopes of catching him at work in the kitchen. The sight of it usually warmed your heart.

“No she’s still out Mum,” he’s on the phone, “she hadn’t slept. I know. Long flights just make it worse.”

You feel like you’re intruding.

“It’s just….it sounds awful...but she’s always so down after she talks with her family. And these couple of weeks in the States has put her all out of sorts…..yes that is HER mother but that woman always seems to find a way to make Y/N doubt everything. It breaks my heart.”

You blink back tears. It’s amazing how well he knows your moods. You step into his line of sight.

He flashes that wonderful smile, “it would appear Sleeping Beauty has had the curse lifted. I need to go. All right...I will...love you too.”

He rounds the island and kisses you. It’s soft and warm and everything you need, “morning sweetheart. Mum sends her love.”

You lean against the island as he tends to dinner, “I heard. Probably more than you wanted me to.”

“Oh,” he half turned to face you, “what exactly did you hear little one?”

-Part 2-

#henry cavill #henry cavill x you #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill fluff #henry cavill fanfic #a smooth sea never made a good sailor #oddduckthatgirl

297 notes · View notes

thelastpilot · 4 years

Text

Empty Chairs- A DJWifi Fic

This is one of my finished commissions for the amazing charity even @mlbforblm with a 3k fic commissioned under the request for ‘DJWifi hurt comfort’. If you would like to commission something from me as well before this event concludes please go here to check out my slots! Please donate to this great cause and get a fic from yours truly.~~

----

Nino’s house was full of noise, usually. It was four people, but it always seemed like more than that. There were always songs playing in different rooms at different times so it would feel like loading into a new area in a video game every time you turned a corner. There was always cooking or bickering or talking happening at nearly every hour, punctuated by singing or rambling, or anything really. The Lahiffe’s loved noise, or at the very least they were certainly good at it.

But today the only noise came from Chris.

Nino’s little brother was playing in the living room, like he usually did. He was sprawled out on every surface like a bird making a nest, every single object that he thought might be necessary to his entertainment strewn around him. His radius was getting wider with every minute, happily pulling down colorful blankets from the couch to add this his secular chaos.

He didn’t pay much mind to the quiet of the house, he knew where everyone was if he thought he might need them. At most he might have noticed that no one was stopping him today, and his play time was not interrupted by the demand to clean up or quiet down. He didn’t see his parents much, both of them drifting past to check on him every once in a while, asking him if he needed something in subdued voices. The most he saw of his mother was the once or twice she came in to watch, looking over him silently as he involved himself in his games.

She would come up to him sometimes, running her hands through his hair and holding him close. For the most part though she was distant, but he didn’t mind that so much.

He never saw Nino at all, aware of the fact that he must be home but not seeing him. Chris pouted a little when he noticed this, prepared to barge in when the stilted nature of the house was broken by a sudden, perky knock at the door.

The door remained shut for awhile long than was usual, despite the fact that Alya could clearly hear Chris yelling his head off to announce someone was there. She was alone in the hallway but she rolled her eyes nonetheless, sighing deeply but still smiling a little.

Chris was loud, all the time. It was one of Nino’s primary complaints about him, although she knew how much he loved him. Thinking of her boyfriend she smiled again, feeling pretty pleased with her spontaneous decision to drop in. She had been nearby and liked the idea of dragging him out with her, coming by unannounced on a weekend. She was in the midst of imagining what their impromptu date night might look like when the door finally opened, revealing the kind, withdrawn face of Nino’s mother.

“Oh, hello sweetheart,” Mrs. Lahiffe greeted her, a polite smile gracing her face. “Nino hadn’t told me you were coming over.”

“He doesn’t know,” Alya announced with a sly smile, “I just happened to be nearby and thought I might come by, if that’s okay. I was hoping to drag him out somewhere anyways.”

To her surprise, his mother stalled, her polite smile falling slightly into gentle concern. “Oh, he didn’t know you were coming?” She paused, and the way she looked over her shoulder made Alya hesitate slightly. When she looked back her expression was extraordinarily gentle, finally saying, “Actually, I’m not sure he is in the mood for visitors honey. Well I suppose I can ask, I know you came all the way up here…” she paused again, mulling it over.

“O-oh well, um,” Alya stuttered, surprised at the turn. “I hadn’t realized it was a bad time, I didn’t mean to-,”

“Let me ask,” Mrs. Lahiffe interrupted her, smiling kindly again but… Alya noticed this time that it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Maybe he wants the company. Just wait here, okay?”

“Yeah sure, no problem,” Alya was quick to agree, trading a slight nod with her before she gently shut the door again.

A slight rebuff like that, as kind as it possible could have been, was still cause for overthinking. Alya couldn’t help but feel a little stupid suddenly, wishing she had shot him a text of some kind. It was too late now though, but she wasn’t kept waiting for long before the door opened again and Nino was looking out at her.

Before he could even speak, Alya’s heart hesitated in its beat. She always considered herself observant, especially with things she knew very well. It only took a fraction of a second for her to recognize Nino’s subdued expression. The kind that came on with quiet moments alone where he thought himself into a spiral. It was so subtle, just the way his smile touched his eyes just barely. The way he tilted his head, how his voice carried when he greeted her.

“Hey baby,” he said after seemingly forever in her mind, though it was only an instant. As he looked at her, his smile became a little easier. “I didn’t know you were coming. If you texted me I’m sorry I- I wasn’t ghosting you I’m just not looking at my phone.”

“No I um, I didn’t really give a heads up I was just nearby.” She paused, about to say something more when he stepped to the side.

“Come on in, my rooms a mess but I know you don’t care.”

“I don’t have to,” she quickly gave him, stopping him as he had already been turning to head inside. “If it’s a bad time.”

“Nah,” was all he said.

They sat in his room somewhat quietly, Nino filling the time with aimless chitchat. He was barely paying attention to what he said, seeming tired and distracted to her. His room was about as cluttered as it usually was, clothes and controllers hanging around but swiftly shoved to the side when he realized there was nowhere to sit really.

She couldn’t help how closely she watched him, waiting only long enough for a break in his rambling to ask, “Babe, is everything okay?”

He had been standing by his bed when she finally got it out, his back to her as she sat in his computer chair. She focused on the way his shoulders… stilled, and then purposefully relaxed, analyzing his expression when he turned to face her.

“Yeah, it’s good.” He hesitated. “Why?” he asked a beat too late, meeting her eyes after another moment too long.

“Well… I know I kind of just swung in. Your mom mentioned that you might not be in the mood for visitors. And you haven’t texted me all day, I mean I just assumed you were working but…” she trailed off intentionally, hoping he might fill in.

To her surprise he frowned slightly. “Did she say that?” He scanned her eyes and found some kind of affirmative, nodding to himself. He turned away and fussed with his bed for a second.

He only waited for awhile more before he sighed, sitting on the mattress.

“Yeah,” he finally muttered aloud, surprising her again with its heaviness. Nino ran a hand over his face, displacing his glasses and sighed heavily, like the effort of the thin performance he had managed was extraordinary and taxing.

Alya’s reaction was instant, crossing the space and climbing on the bed, her heart starting to race as he leaned into her, letting her hold him without complaint or comment. He sagged into her, breathing deeply like he was gathering his resolve.

“Babe what is it?” Alya pressed again, trying to be patient but so caught off guard by it that she felt that urgent need to correct it. They had been together for a long time though, and she knew that pushing wouldn’t work.

Nino sighed. And was quiet for awhile.

After a few minutes he sat up slightly, staring forward at nothing, she thought.

He could be so motionless sometimes… when he was wrapped up in something she couldn’t even picture. It was so rare to see him like this. Anger and disappointment were more common with him, though he let so much roll off his back in general. She knew how to handle that the same way he knew how to handle her difficult moments.

But she almost never knew what to do when he felt so far away from her, still and subdued.

She waited for a long time, before suddenly, he apologized.

“I’m sorry Al,” he finally gave her, his voice low and heavy. “I feel like somehow you’re gonna be mad at me.”

“Mad?” she responded, waiting for him to look at her but it didn’t come, he just kept looking forward. She traced his eyeline to his desk, where she noticed for the first time his red baseball cap lay discarded. She hadn’t even noticed he wasn’t wearing it. She looked between him and the hat, saying again when he seemed content to say nothing, “What would I be mad about?”

He was quiet again, and she forced herself to breathe, demanding of herself that she be patient. He took a deep breath as well, and she could feel him absently running his hand against her back.

“There’s some stuff I’ve never mentioned to you. We’ve been dating for years now, now that I think about it… it’s fucking crazy that I never said anything. I should have, I don’t know why I didn’t. It’s just hard, and old. But you don’t even know and I hate that but I was the one who didn’t say it so- fuck.” He paused, putting his face in his hand again, taking off his glasses entirely now and setting them aside. His voice filled with emotion as the words got faster, cutting off abruptly when he stopped himself, like a dam on a river.

Alya just waited, knowing that he had momentum now. She watched him carefully as he prepared himself for something. And when he took his hand away from his face he looked pained, and then frustrated, and then far away again. Distant.

The moment hung in the air between them…

The sun had started its slow descent at much the same time Alya had arrived, the light of it so bright against the prevailing face of Nino’s apartment building that his room had been ablaze with it, and he had felt no need to turn on his light. With that forgotten and the sun pitching low, sinking beyond the threshold of the tall buildings of Paris, the space was abruptly dim… the fire of sunset shrinking up his walls and vanishing from his face. In that dim light he was still… staring ahead and seeing nothing much.

Nothing but an old hat that looked dull in the shade.

“I have an older brother.”

When he finally spoke, his voice was even but quiet… anchoring himself to Alya’s presence besides him even if he couldn’t look at her just then.

Nino took a deep breath, and closed his eyes. Willing himself to continue.

“Today would have been his birthday. He died awhile ago, probably. I guess we don’t really know, but he was never found and he never came back. I don’t think he would ever just disappear on his own, it wouldn’t have been like him. He loved us and we had a happy home, it wasn’t like he would run away. He wouldn’t take off on me.” He paused, and then took another deep breath, taking time to steel himself. “There was a pretty big age gap between us, my parents had married young and they had him right away, they didn’t decide to have me until after they moved to Paris. So I was eleven when he disappeared. Mom was pregnant with Chris when it happened. He wasn’t born until five months later.”

He still couldn’t look at Alya… but he focused on the way she held him tighter, reaching on hand to lightly touch the locks of her hair that spilled over her shoulder.

They were soft, and he could picture the color of the ends with perfect recall.

He had her memorized.

“… what was his name?”

When she spoke it was so gentle, careful and full of concern. His heart finally hit an uneven pace, his fingers curled in her hair.

“Noah.”

“…what was he like?”

“You aren’t-…,” Nino hesistated, finally opening his eyes and turning his head, still not quite looking at her. “You aren’t angry?”

“Why would I be angry with you?” She pulled away from him slightly, but he moved to hold her still so quickly it was like the reflex of a child learning how to swim. ‘Don’t move away from me yet I can’t do it on my own.’

He couldn’t look her in the eye, so he settled for watching her lips, wondering how she wasn’t scowling like he expected. Just tight, concerned.

“It’s a big thing.”

“It’s a personal thing.”

“I still should have said something to you. You came along after he was gone but… he’s still my family. I should have shared him with you I just… couldn’t. I didn’t know what to say.”

Alya touched his chin, steering his eyes up and looking through him, it felt like.

He always got so quiet and distant. But she could see him hiding there, behind even tones and trailing sentences. He was pretending like it was all okay and a long time ago and thinking about it didn’t change anything and crying doesn’t bring him back and its been too long Nino just let it go he isn’t coming back things change all at once and they don’t go back-

And she was holding his face, saying his name and pulling him towards her, letting him collapse into her.

He clung to her like his swimming lesson had gone to the deep end… it was dark and deep and he didn’t know how to do it yet.

He hated how he was always going to feel like a little kid, waiting for his big brother to come home.

Alya knew to let him go quiet, just holding him tightly. The house was still too, except for the energetic play of a little boy who didn’t realize he was missing anything.

It was during one of Chris’ loud bellows that Nino sighed, speaking again somewhat bitterly.

“I hate that Chris never met him. We’ve told him about Noah but it doesn’t mean much to him. How can you teach a kid to miss somebody? What’s even the point of trying… would it be better somehow if he missed him too?” Nino leaned into Alya heavily, staring at his hands. “It bothers me when he draws pictures of his family and Noah isn’t in them. That’s not his fault, but I hate it.”

Alya nodded slowly, glad he was talking again. “My mom said once that loss is hard because it changes everything. She described losing my grandma and she said it wasn’t just her absence. It was how a chair becomes an empty chair.” Alya hesitated slightly, wondering if this was even appropriate to say, but attempting to relate to him somehow. “It must be hard to see it in everything.”

“Empty chairs,” Nino agreed, his tone low. “Empty spots on the couch, full boxes of stuff he used to use every day.” He looked up slightly, drawing her attention again to his hat. “Stuff he used to wear all the time.”

Alya said nothing at first, looking at the old hand-me-down hat and appreciating what it meant to him. She had always known his hat was incredibly important to him, it wasn’t a joke and he never thought it was funny when other people touched it. Now she realized why.

She tried to imagine someone who looked a lot like Nino, but older. Her picture of him was hazy and indistinct, but the hat she pictured on his head made it realer somehow.

“Nino?”

He turned slightly at his name, moving slowly, but eventually looking at her. His expression was soft, and reserved, scanning her face and watching her with some unperceivable emotion.

Alya crafted her words carefully, doing her best to be gentle. “I’m sorry I never got to know him. And I’m sorry you don’t have him. But, maybe you could tell me about him.”

Nino kept staring, but after awhile he smiled slightly. It was a somber image, but there was something nostalgic there too.

“Well I can tell you one thing for sure.”

“What?”

He smiled, tears in his eyes.

“He would have loved you…”

#mlbforblm #nino lahiffe #alya cesaire #djwifi #miraculous ladybug #ml #this is based off of a tweet once put out about ninos hat #and i ran with the concept #death tw

214 notes · View notes