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#which is how almost everyone else uses him whether they mean to or not
sophiacloud28 · 3 days
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Vent piece, AU, Rise Leo, Angst
It’s cold in here. Even in pants, sneakers, and a hoodie, the chill of the planetarium still eats at him a little. He’s okay with it, though. It’s not quite enough for brumation, which is the important part. He doesn’t need to completely lose track of everything. He just needs… peace.
And, as he lies across the floor while staring up at the star-covered ceiling, he’s sure he’s found it. He’s certain that, if only for a moment or two, he is finally allowed to rest. Finally able to think of something else than his work, his constant running around, his never-ending parade of personas. Hell, he can almost feel himself drift into nothingness as the light music he hears cradles him to near sleep.
It's always nice, always comfortable, always –
He blinks as he hears rustling. Someone sits in a chair in front of where he’s lying on the floor. And while he wants to call it an accident, his nostrils tell him it's not.
The scent of subtle soap and warm skin. The rustle of pants as legs are crossed and brought apart again. The chair squeaks at the attempt to settle in it, but nervousness is keeping its current occupant from getting comfortable.
He wishes he could say the same. Unfortunately, the cold has a good grip on him and while he’s not brumating, he definitely feels sluggish.
Not that you’ll attack him. You have no way to defend yourself save for a can of pepper spray — the thing smells absolutely vile — and from the presentations he’s seen you give, you don’t have a mean bone in your body, which just… helps.
“Want to stay for the video?”
The thing that impresses him is the way you’ve just… made this look as casual as possible while letting him know several things.
One, you know he’s there. How you caught him when he always takes for the grates the second you have a new group is a mystery — there’s hours, a schedule, and he’s got it all down — but you did. Second, you’ve known for a while. The lack of inflection in your tone indicates experience and redefines your nervousness as one of casual approach. Three, … he just wants to turn his brain off. He wishes he couldn’t understand or care about how an employee knows about his presence and hasn’t called the authorities yet. He knows he could deal with them, certainly if he were a little warmer, but this? This goddamn circus? He’s here to get off work, not…
He sighs. Shuffles. He owes you an answer. He just…
“Knock on the back of my seat for a yes.”
He looks up, away from the stars to you. Your back is facing him, then again he’s in a weird position that puts his head near the seat. He could say nothing, not even knock and watch you squirm. He could crack a joke, say something that might make you laugh or groan as he attempts socializing.
But right now… he just can’t be assed.
He reaches up and knocks against the plastic. You just say thank you and stay there for a bit longer before you get up to rummage for something near the projector. There’s shuffling in the chair you were just seated in before he hears you take off for the doors.
Time for the next group. He wonders if he should stay. If he should do what he usually does and skedaddle before anyone notices there’s a bum on the floor. But when everyone steers clear of the seat, therefore him, he has to wonder what’s going on. What you did to manage it so that, when the lights fade out and he hears rustling, he knows it’s you.
You don’t speak. The video is a speaking one after all. It does make him wonder, though. Even long after the video’s done and he’s left to stare at the stars again, he wonders what just happened and if he should care. He’s not complaining, though, not after getting to finally see the visuals, albeit from an interesting angle.
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It doesn’t stop him from returning, either.
It’s been a week. He’s debated whether or not it’s worth risking his neck, his family’s neck over someone knowing he’s using the planetarium as his way to relax. He’s wondered if he shouldn’t tell the fam, or at least his little brother, to make sure it’s safe.
But that would mean letting everyone know. That would mean having to deal with that mess and he honestly… doesn’t want to.
He's tired. He’s done. His brothers, even his dad, have completely drained him dry of anything he could remotely care about. So he goes without hesitating.
He navigates lunch hour and watches the shift change. He flinches as your loud coworker laughs and jokes, reminding him of himself in the most obnoxious way. So much so that he half-wants to punch them for being so annoying. He waits on the floor instead, though, and is grateful when you join him the second they leave, leaving him to knock on your chair.
This behavior is more befitting his twin. He doesn’t care.
“Sorry for that. For what it's worth, the next group should all be teenagers, so no crying children.”
He knows. Presentation hours are for classes. Field trips. And while you don’t necessarily struggle during them, depending on the class, it can get disgustingly loud. Even when teenagers are involved.
He knocks on the chair again. You laugh a little before sighing, “I’m sorry I have to ask you to go. I am getting a break later on, though. If you want to stick around until then, I’ll be happy to show you some interesting features.”
And the tridactyl hand he’s been using to knock on your seat grips his hoodie as he thinks, debates.
He shouldn’t. It’s dangerous. No matter how innocent you are, the mere knowledge of who he is could ruin your existence and his. He’s not here to make friends.
… But the company is nice.
His hand hesitates for a second longer before he knocks. You then hush him away and he goes to the vent where he watches you work and barely get to breathe when you get two classes back to back. And he quietly lets himself in after all the hubbub, laying on the floor as you sit with a breath into the chair he knocks on.
The fact that it gets him a chuckle almost makes him smile. The fact that hears you tap the seat next to you worries him.
“Come on. Best seat in the house,” you tell him, though, and while it doesn’t convince him, it does make him move, make him join you even as the seat creaks under his weight. It has him making sure that you can’t see his face or his hands as he sits next to you. Not that you seem to care, though, as your eyes are fixed on the ceiling and your hands fiddle with a small contraption you immediately bring forward and click on once he’s there.
The lights turn off. The domed ceiling goes from evening to night, showing the stars. And, with another click, lines start drawing themselves across the artificial sky, connecting the stars into groups and images slowly appear, making him blink.
Constellations. He’s heard you talking about those. But thanks to the light pollution, the most he’s been able to spot are the brightest stars and, if he’s lucky, the Summer Triangle. Now, he’s finally able to see them.
He almost gets up. He doesn’t. The moment feels too sacred to break. You seem to notice the shift, though, as he can hear you smile when you speak.
“This is the Greek one, which was eventually taken over by the Romans. There are more, though. The Babylonians had an incredible star chart they left behind, explaining what they saw and why it was important to them. The Mayans had one also, and it's been suggested that other Central American cultures might have either used the same map or had their own variations to it. The most interesting one, though, is the Asian one. Western influence was scarce, so their system works very differently even today."
… Ah. He gets it, now. It's almost funny, too, and enough to make him smile. Make almost reach out in the hopes that you understand that you either don't need to share or that he's grateful. He can't do either, though. No matter how much the world wants to think that there's space for everyone, the fact that he's underground, that the Hidden City exists tells him otherwise. He can't let himself do anything but speak, and breaking the silence feels like blasphemy.
"… Thank you."
He still does it, though. Not for his sake but yours. You need to know he appreciates it, even if some of it is going completely over his head.
"No problem."
Because it's worth the softness that invades your tone. Even if it requires more effort than he has energy for, the payoff gives him just a little more than he thought he'd be given. And he likes that. God, does he.
"Anything you want to see?"
"The star map without the images?"
Because if this is all it takes to get this to work as you click and the images disappear, then he's more than willing to try.
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Unfortunately, winter does not seem to agree.
Brumation becomes a problem. His hoodie is no longer enough, but wearing anything else might hinder his movements in the vents. He can't afford to lose the agility, but he knows that, if he's not careful, he might knock out.
Something you seem to notice as well.
Within a month of winter starting, he finds a blanket waiting outside the vent. His careful thanks only get him even more wrapped inside the surprisingly thin yet cozy fleece blanket as you fuss over him while never once looking up as he's asked you to. It doesn't help that every time, you simply smile after he tells you that he's comfortable, tapping a hand against his plastron.
"Good. Wouldn't want you to pass out."
Which only reminds him of what he's doing and how… he's treating this entire relationship.
No doubt you're getting bored. Annoyed, even. Not that you've told him as such and he doubts he'd ever hear you complain, but he doesn't think he's being fair in any way, certainly considering that he's been keeping this up for weeks.
He doesn't hate you. He hopes you know that. It's just… he comes here when everything is just too much. And you pampering him… is just part of it, now.
"Hold?"
"Yeah."
You joining him on the floor between presentations as he buries his face into your side. Him whimpering, trying not to chirp or do anything that would sound remotely strange as he lets you talk about whatever planet has caught your attention or whatever paper you're working on this week. And you chuckling, even laughing sometimes as he does or tries to either give you advice or ignore you. It's all part of the thing that makes him feel a little better, a little stronger by the time he leaves. It's all part of something that makes him feel safe even if he barely says anything.
Because by the time he gets to you, there's nothing left for him to give.
The silence as his eyes burn almost deafens him. He feels you move and almost refuses to let you get away only to realize he's too weak, too slow thanks to the cold to hold onto anything. The cold, the sluggishness he'd fought so hard to find becomes his enemy as you disappear and reappear to help him up and out the doors, your blanket covering him up like a cloak to cover his face. And it's not any better when he steps outside and winter stakes its claim on him and the only thing he can concentrate on is your voice.
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The amount of research you have to ingest in the following hours is insane. You figured something of the sort was going to happen, certainly with how closed off he was being, but you'd hoped to avoid any catastrophe involving your new friend.
Alas, from the way he behaves, you should have called this. From his self-destructive behavior, you should have known that he would drive himself to hypothermia, leaving you to figure out how to sort this mess. And that unfortunately means no more secrets.
… You think it's hypothermia. When you see the green skin and the three-fingered hands, you're no longer sure. Certainly when he's not shivering and the only thing that helps are the red crescents near his eyes and under his blue mask.
Blue mask… Where the hell is he from? And does it matter when this is probably going to ruin your relationship? He thrives on secrets and you… Well, you just ruined a whole lot of that trying to save his life after he broke, didn't you?
Either way, he's safe. He'll be alright in a few hours. He just needs to get to a decent body temperature, which he is safely getting to while bundled up in your bed. He seems to have an internal body temperature, after all, just… one lower than yours.
Part of you worries as you try not to hover. The other knows better and simply keeps you busy with making dinner, and you can't be happier with the meal you chose as you let the pea soup simmer. You work on making something warm to drink along with it, too, hoping that he'll be okay with some Chai.
Then again, after an hour, you wonder if he'll be alright in general as you dare enter the room with the food and drink on a tray.
You can hear him breathing. That's much, much better than earlier. The fact that he doesn't really acknowledge you doesn't surprise you, either. If anything, the fact that he's looking at you as you set the tray down is the biggest anomaly. He doesn't follow you. He has too little energy to even begin caring, which you can't blame him for. So this — this is new. And concerning when he doesn't sit up upon seeing the food.
Guilt? A need to hide? The mask and the fact that you've never seen anything of him until now tell you it's the latter. He might not have had any energy, but he did keep you from something, likely only draining him further. It's why you hadn't fought him when he'd asked for your presence on the floor. He needs it, craves a presence he doesn't have to explain everything to. And you have been for the past three months. Something you find absolutely heartbreaking.
"I made some soup and chai. Hope you like it."
And more heartbreaking still is the way he grabs your wrist as you attempt to leave.
You turn to him. Let him pull at your wrist and have you sit on the edge of the bed. He does not let go, though, instead nearing you and settling against your back, curling up there with his shell to the door.
Even if he didn't refuse your offer of getting on your lap before you sit on your bed so that he can, you know it's for protection. It's not the first time he does it, either, even if it's completely unconscious. He cares. More than he lets you or anyone else know. And you're almost willing to bet that's what's breaking him.
He loves. He's just… so tied up in whatever else he has to do that it's not showing properly.
You carefully, sweetly touch his head, something he welcomes with a stretch of the neck and a quiet whimper. You smile as he relaxes, using your lap as a resting spot, and tears no longer in his eyes. He doesn't sleep, not quite, but he chirps, trills, and nudges your hand if you so much as stop petting him. Like a cat, he refuses to let you go until he's had his fill and you're honestly very much fine with it, certainly when, after enough coaxing, you manage to get him to sit and eat.
In fact, the only thing that bothers you is his phone the second it starts ringing, prompting you to fiddle with his hoodie and collect the phone to see who it is.
Another turtle. This one red and massive. Raph is the name on screen. Doesn't stop you from wanting to throw the phone across the room or shutting it down before you resume feeding and petting the one you know to be a slider.
They're supposed to be tolerant to cold. Resistant to brumation. You wonder how badly he's been worn down for this to happen. You also hate the fact that it's making you feel almost violently protective to the point where you want to lash out at the other turtle for treating your friend like this.
… Maybe you should have taken that call. Just to know his name. Then again, you don't want to ruin the trust between the both of you, no matter how little there is. He is at his weakest and he doesn't need to be tested further.
"You think you're up for a warm bath now that you've eaten?"
Besides, from the nod you feel against your shoulder, you have other ways to communicate with him.
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He doesn’t fight you. He doesn’t do much of anything, actually, as you scrub him clean. He only blinks at you like he’s seeing you for the first time once you’re done. He only lets you help him out of the bath and halfway back to your room when his hand lets go of yours and he — he looks away as if caught doing something, being somewhere he shouldn’t be.
“Where — where’s my stuff?”
And you realize why very quickly.
“Your clothes are in the bathroom and your phone is in my bedroom.”
“… Did I… get a call?”
“You did. From someone called Raph. I didn’t pick up.”
He’s awake. He’s coherent. His brain has finally caught up.
“… I have to go.”
And his thoughts and words hurt more than you’re comfortable with.
“Go get your clothes, then. I’ll go grab your phone.”
He looks at you with doubt, but turns around and heads back. You enter your bedroom and collect the blue jacketed phone before walking back to the bathroom where the slider is slipping on his hoodie, having already worked through his pants. You set said phone on the sink where he can see it as he works on his shoes next, unsurprised to hear him soon babbling to someone about trackers and getting someone off his ass for something. What surprises you is the tone. It’s animated, filled with a dramatic drawl and flair you had yet to hear from the slider. It’s nothing like you’ve heard, and it makes you realize just why he’s so drained, certainly when you hear “big bro” from his lips.
You cover your mouth. Your eyes burn. He ends the call and leaves your bathroom before anything else can happen, though and, just from the smile that meets you, you know you can’t cry.
“I’m afraid I gotta go. Someone’s breathing down my neck and might break the building if I don’t get going.”
There’s no point in it, after all.
“I’m… sorry I kept you.”
“You’re fine, sweetheart. Things just happen you know?”
“I guess. Do you –?”
“I know my way out. No worries.”
You’ve already lost him.
He gets to your living room where he takes to your window instead of your door. You feel your face hurt as you watch him expertly jump onto the sill.
“Hey.”
“Hm?”
“Will I see you again?”
And it near contorts in pain as you watch his face, his persona break for a second, an instant in which you get your answer.
No. You won’t. You will never ever see the slider again. He’s no longer safe with you, and it has nothing to do with you.
“We’ll see.”
You watch him jump away. You feel your heart break. And you wonder if you could have done anything differently… while knowing there was never another option.
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warlordfelwinter · 7 months
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exchanges that make me feel a certain way
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cheolhub · 7 months
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WHAT YOU NEED — JEON WONWOO ࿐
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summary. wonwoo knows how shy you get telling him what you want, but he’ll get you to use your words one way or another.
wc. 2.5k
warnings. mean-ish soft dom!wonwoo, sub! reader, corruption kink + slight humiliation kink! lots of teasing from wonwoo, lots of begging from reader, pet names [love, baby, sweet girl], dirty talk [😵‍💫], possessiveness (reader is so into it), heavy praise, unprotected sex, creampie — MINORS DNI 18+
note. it’s been months… hellooo… i forgot how to write so forgive me for the shitty plot lol. this is me attempting to get back into the writing world 🤓 hopefully ONE of u enjoys this <3 p.s. i’m srsly in my wonu era
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“remember what i said, love,” wonwoo murmured, soft lips pressed against the shell of your ear. “if you want something, you gotta use your words.”
you hated this– everything about this– the teasing, the deep timbre of his voice that shoots heat straight to your core, him in general. he’s well aware of the fact that you can’t stand it at this moment, but that doesn’t put an end to his teasing. 
your back arches off his chest as you feel the ghost of his fingers over your painfully wet cunt, covered in a pair of cotton panties. “wonwoo…” you whine, eyes brimming with tears of frustration. “please…”
he merely chuckles, pressing a kiss to the skin under your ear. “please what?”
when you and wonwoo started dating, you were so shy. so shy and so, so sweet. you’d never been with anyone before him, and of course he felt bad that he was the one to rob you of your innocence, but he was filled with a sense of pride (and urgency) when he’d found out he was the one to corrupt you and ruin you for everyone else. 
and he was gentle. yes, jeon wonwoo was so, very gentle, handling you like a pretty doll while coaxing orgasms out of you left and right with his hands and mouth till your body was slack and you were nothing but a puddle of tears. he got you ready for his cock and you took it well. then you took it again. and again. and again, till you and him both knew you were his and he was yours. 
it got to the point where you’d crave him at the most inconvenient times. while you were running errands, at work, at dinner with your friends– it was almost insufferable. 
but he always took care of you. all you had to do was ask and he’d be there at your beck and call with whatever you wanted, whether it was with his mouth, fingers or cock. 
he always makes you ask because wonwoo’s taken a certain… liking… to making  you say the filthiest things. he knows it makes you nervous, but that’s why he thinks he loves it. he loves your stammering and how he can feel the heat radiating from your body. it’s cute.
which is why you’re in your current predicament, sat between his legs, your own spread over his with your back pressed to his chest after sending an innocent ‘come over, please? <3’ text. 
“don’t make me say it, won… it’s…it’s unbecoming. just… please.”
usually, he’s not so adamant on getting you to say exactly what you want. all you had to do was say please, and he was all yours. 
but no, not today apparently. 
“there’s nothing unbecoming about it, my love.” he noses at your neck, his breath fanning over your racing pulse and eliciting your soft shudder. “just tell me what you invited me over for and i’ll give it to you.”
“please… touch me.” you whisper, heat creeping from where his lips are on your to neck all the way up to the tips of your ears. 
you can feel his shit-eating grin and you want to scream at him, but your need for him is much more profound than your desire to slap him in the face for teasing you to this extent. 
his hands rub up and down your arms and you hear his smile when he asks, “like this?”
you groan, shaking your head, “you know what i mean!” 
“i don’t know what you mean, actually. can you dumb it down for me?” 
you mentally curse him out, but you try to steady your breathing before you speak again. “touch me… down… there.” you attempt to say, but it comes out as more of a squeak.
wonwoo’s uncharacteristically large hands find your tummy and you want to sob when he asks, “here?” you shake your head. “words.” the demand vibrates through you and you let you an embarrassing whimper.
“lower,” you whisper, unable to trust your voice. “please, wonwoo.”
he runs his fingers down your abdomen and trails them down your thighs. you can’t help the cry that leaves your mouth. “mean. you’re so mean.”
“you can say it, sweet girl.” he whispers. “it’s not unbecoming. it’s not inappropriate. it’s fucking hot. i want you to tell me exactly what you want and i swear to god i’ll give it to you.”
you sniffle, frustrated and slightly embarrassed, but you stutter out in the softest voice he’s ever heard you use, “please touch my pussy, wonwoo.”
you think it feels awkward and gross coming out of your mouth with your voice, but wonwoo… wonwoo groans, hand immediately slipping into your panties. “good fucking girl.” he grumbles as his fingers find your clit. 
you jolt at the contact but melt into him just as quickly. “fuck,” you whimper, thankful that you’re finally receiving the touch you’ve been craving for the past half hour. “f-faster, please.”
wonwoo’s chest swells with that familiar sense of pride again as he hears your beg. he obliges, the rough pads of his fingers circling the swollen, pleading bud. “you’re so fucking wet…”
you moan, head falling back on his shoulder. your face burns like never before as you get out, “f-for… you. ‘m wet for you.”
wonwoo isn’t always vocal, but when he is? he’s loud. so the moan that slips from his mouth startles you a bit. 
“that’s right, all for me.” he grunts, possessiveness lacing his voice causing the jostling of butterflies in your tummy. “all fucking mine, forever mine.”
you change your mind at this– you love the teasing, the deep timbre of his voice, him especially. 
“always yours.” you nod vigorously, body writhing as he quickens the movement of his fingers. 
wonwoo doesn’t have much self-control when it comes to you, so it’s taking everything in him to not flip you over and fuck you till all you can say is yours, yours, always yours. instead, he opts for trying to get more out of your pretty mouth. “how do you feel, baby? tell me how much you like my fingers playing with this pretty little cunt.”
it’s so filthy, but you can’t help but arch your back at the sound of his words. “love them s’much, wonwoo. feels s’good.”
he’s sure you do feel good, he’s a skilled man after all, but he knows you probably need more. 
“yeah?” he responds breathily, cock aching at the validation and how pretty you sound saying his name. “this enough to make you cum, or do you want more?”
your brain fogs over at the thought of more. you can nearly taste ecstasy on the tip of your tongue and you don’t doubt that you could get off with just his fingers, yet… the idea of being filled to the brim with his fingers or his cock is much more compelling. 
“more.” you breathe in reply. 
“what was that?” he teases, fingers slowing down. 
there’s that wicked sense of humor that makes you want to slap him across the face.
you barred your teeth before gritting, “fuck me, please. i need more. i need you, wonwoo.”
his ministrations stop and before you get the chance to complain, he’s rolling your panties down your legs and guiding you to straddle his abdomen. he slips his sweats down enough for his cock to come out and, even though you can’t see it, you can feel its looming presence. 
“take what’s yours, baby.” he stares up at you while you stare back, eyes wide. 
“y-you… you want me to…?” he knows what your unfinished question translates to and he nods and gives you a lazy smile even though you can see the burning desire in his blown out pupils.
you let out a short breath and nod, more to yourself than anything. he’s never let you have control while you’re on top, but you feel giddy that he’s giving you a chance now. you lift your hips up and take a hold of his hardened length in your hands. you run the blushy tip of his cock through your folds, eliciting a hiss from the man under you, before finally sliding down his cock. slowly, you feel every inch of him invade your pussy and it’s so good, despite the slight burn.
you forget how tight the fit is every time. even with how wet you are, you still feel your walls stretching to accommodate his size. 
you cry softly, body going limp as you finally hit the base of his cock. “won…”
“you feel so good,” he moans softly, hands finding purchase on your hips. “are you alright? does it hurt?” he manages to ask, cock twitching at the way your walls wrap around him.
you shake your head incessantly, hoping he doesn’t worry too much. “no– no, ‘m okay. j-just need to adjust.”
wonwoo nods empathetically, rubbing soothing circles into your skin to ease you. “you’re doing so well.” he whispers after a minute of silence, the only sounds being your ragged breaths and the soft hum of the air conditioning. “gonna make sure you feel so good, baby.”
you feel the heat reappear and a gush of arousal leak at the praise in his hushed voice. it inspires you to take action. 
you press your palms to his clothed abdomen, wishing he’d taken off his shirt so you can feel his skin, but you can’t be bothered to ask him to do so now. you lift your hips up his cock before letting yourself drop, a moan tumbling out of your mouth when you feel how deep he is inside you. 
you repeat the sloppy movements, stangled moans slipping with every sharp thrust as you spear yourself on his length over and over. 
it’s not till wonwoo guides you with the tight grip of his hands on your waist that you find a steady tempo, the sound of skin on skin growing louder with the mixed sounds of his grunts and your mewls. 
you slip your hands under his shirt, craving the closeness, and lightly run your nails down the skin. you feel him contract under the contact and you can’t stop the way your walls tighten around him when his hands squeeze you harder. 
the longer you ride him, the more your thighs burn. it eventually causes your speed to falter and wonwoo, ever the observer, is quick to notice. he decides you’ve had enough and bucks his hips into you, meeting you halfway while groaning out your name. 
the bulbous head of his cock rams into your sweet, special spot as he takes over and you throw your head back in utmost pleasure. tears spring to your eyes and wonwoo finds this to be the most beautiful sight he’s ever laid his eyes on. your tits bouncing with every push, your mouth cracked open as the prettiest sounds leave it, the way your eyebrows knit in pleasure– he makes a mental note to bring his camera next time you invite him over. 
“tell me what you need, love.” he demands yet again, words breathy and clipped as his cock throbs in between your velvet walls. “tell me what this pretty pussy needs and i’ll fucking give it to you.” his sentence ends in a growl when your nails bite into his bare skin, leaving red, crescent shapes in their wake. 
you let out a choked sob, “w-wonu–”
he sits up, using his strength to bounce you up and down at a leisure pace– one that he knows does nothing for your needy body. “don’t get shy on me now, baby, you can tell me.” he coaxes, sultry voice circling your brain. 
you swear if your body burns any hotter, you’ll explode.
your mouth opens to let out a plea, “p-please make me cum– please, i-i wanna–” your words are swallowed by him as he smashes his lips to yours. you moan his name into his mouth and he all but moans back into yours. 
you involuntarily clench around him when he hastily bucks into you while also guiding your hips on his cock. when he pulls back, he sports swollen lips and lust-ridden eyes and it makes you all the more needy for your coveted release. 
“rub your clit and get yourself off for me, yeah?” you pants before his mouth lands on one of your breasts, sucking and tugging at the peaked nipple. 
you follow instructions, two of your fingers moving to circle the swollen bud and your free hand gripping his shoulder for more support. 
at the onslaught of pleasure, the knot that’s been rapidly forming in your tummy all night tightens beyond belief and you know you’re on the precipice of an orgasm. wonwoo, being as perceptive as he is, just moans at the way you pulse uncontrollably around his cock. 
if you’ve learned anything from the teasing and the rather humbling experience you’ve had tonight, it’s that you should definitely voice what you want. 
and that’s exactly what you do. 
“i– fuck, wonwoo. i need to cum, please let me.” you beg as you get closer and closer to your anticipated release. 
he releases your nipple with a pop and nearly growls. “cum for me, baby.” 
it’s all you need to hear before a silent scream leaves your lips and white, hot pleasure runs its course. your body goes taut as the tether in your belly snaps in half, cunt and body practically spasming all the while your brain spins erratically. 
wonwoo is enthralled by the sight and feeling of you. the grip he has on you is near bruising as he watches you fall apart on him– feels you fall apart on him. 
“so beautiful,” he praises, voice strained as he nears his own release. “my beautiful girl. you’re so fucking good for me, you know that?” he rambles, cock twitching as you let out more whines and whimpers.
“c-cum in me.” you demand, voice broken and hoarse from all the screaming. “i-i wanna feel it. i need to.”
an animalistic growl bubbles in the back of his throat and his slow pace and sweet praise disappears, replaced by an unforgiving speed at which he pounds into you. you’re back to broken moans as he lets out labored pants till, shortly after, he’s stills inside of you, cock nestled at your hilt and he’s releasing his warm load inside of your battered walls. 
you collapse on top of him, savoring the feeling of his warmth inside of you. 
“did i hurt you?” he whispers after a few minutes of unsteady breathing from the both of you. 
you shake your head. “just my dignity,” you joke softly, resting your forehead against his. “i’m alright, don’t worry.”
he chuckles, cupping your cheek and running the pad of his thumb over the dried tear streaks, “i was a bit mean, huh?”
“so mean.” you tease, kissing the corner of his mouth. “you’re lucky i love you.”
“beyond lucky.”
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hotjaneaustenmenpoll · 2 months
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WHO IS THE HOTTEST JANE AUSTEN MAN ? THE FINAL
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Propaganda...
Captain Wentworth (1995):
Ciaran Hinds has that perfect ruggedness yet friendliness to his face that makes him the perfect charming Wentworth. And all of the longing that he manages to convey in his eyes is so hot.
Wentworth may be angry/resentful with Anne but in general he is charming and the best friend you could ever have. Ciaran gets the pleasant parts of his character and brings them out, while keeping a guarded coolness (protective camouflage) with Anne.
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I dunno if this counts as propaganda or not, but Ciaran Hinds has a face that looks like it was jackhammered out of a shale cliff.
If a line like 'I am half agony...half hope' comes out of a face like that you know that man has a soul for poetry.
I can listen no longer in silence. I must speak to you by such means as are within my reach. You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope. Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are gone for ever. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you almost broke it, eight years and a half ago. Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death. I have loved none but you. Unjust I may have been, weak and resentful I have been, but never inconstant. You alone have brought me to Bath. For you alone, I think and plan. Have you not seen this? Can you fail to have understood my wishes? I had not waited even these ten days, could I have read your feelings, as I think you must have penetrated mine. I can hardly write. I am every instant hearing something which overpowers me. You sink your voice, but I can distinguish the tones of that voice when they would be lost on others. Too good, too excellent creature! You do us justice, indeed. You do believe that there is true attachment and constancy among men. Believe it to be most fervent, most undeviating, in
F. W.
I must go, uncertain of my fate; but I shall return hither, or follow your party, as soon as possible. A word, a look, will be enough to decide whether I enter your father's house this evening or never.  
This is propaganda for the next round because I need my boy to be a finalist! But this letter is all the persuasion I need to know that he is a winner
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Ciarán Hinds in this is a whole other level of "a good man" He makes Anne's decision at the end so much more perfect.
LOOK
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HOW
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HE
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YEARNS
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The yearning the yearning - JLM gives a great look but Captain Wentworth is the king of longing stares. He's trying sooo hard to hate her sooo hard to get over her - 8 years and he thinks he's ready to face her and move on but no he has to notice she's exhausted on the walk, that her nephew is being overwhelming, that she should be dancing and not just playing the piano for everyone else. And even though he's jealous later on when Mr Elliott gives her an "admiring look" in lime he's pleased for her because he knows she deserves to be admired and cherished even if he's angry that he wasn't able to be the one she let admire and cherish her. I just this man - he loves Anne so much and it's so so hot.
Propaganda for Captain Wentworth.
I've always loved Persuasion and so I was voting for him in his polls anyway, but I had never seen the 1995 adaptation. So because of this blog I decided to check it out.
Well. Now I'm obsessed. I came into this tournament fully expecting to vote Firth Darcy to victory. Ciaran Hinds suddenly showed up and sparta kicked him to curb. His every look, every gesture is laden with longing. He's so tender with Anne but then the barely restrained rage in his voice when he speaks to Lady Russell. He's rugged and manly yet tender and considerate.
I BURN, I PINE, I PERISH
If you're wondering why you should vote for Wentworth 95 in the @hotjaneaustenmenpoll, it's because he's got something hot for everyone.
Do you think it's hot when a man dresses up fancy? He looks very dapper in his uniform! Or do you find it more sexy when a man is more casual, a little mussed up, maybe even a little grimy? He does that perfectly too!
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Do you find men hot when they're being tender and restrained? Or do you find men hot when they're losing control a bit, maybe getting a bit passionate with anger or jealousy?
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Do you like a refined man of culture? Or a rugged outdoorsman?
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A warm smile? Or something more broody?
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Someone who's the life of the party, boisterous, laughing, charming? Or the strong silent type, serious, calm, mysterious?
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Hinds's Wentworth does all of these sexy things brilliantly! You cannot lose with him, he's got it all!
II ranked Wentworth as the #1 Austen man in terms of fuckability, and I stand behind that when it comes to Wentworth 95 versus Knightley 09.
Is Wentworth 95 angry sometimes? Yeah. But that's hot, at least coming from Ciaran Hinds' ruggedly handsome face. Have you heard of makeup sex? Tell me Wentworth 95 and Anne don't have the most scorching hot angry makeup sex imaginable 🥵
And yet Wentworth 95 is also super tender! The slow, gentle, worshipful way he kisses Anne at the end?? So beautiful and hot. The longing way he looks at Anne in silence. The way he is so solicitous of Anne's comfort to put her on the carriage with his sister! You can just tell he's gonna take the time to worship his wife in bed.
And let's not forget that he writes the most romantic letter ever written! The depth of passion in this man, my god! 🔥💕🔥
This is not a who is the better man contest, or who is the more faithful to the book, or who would you most want to marry. This is a hotness contest, and Wentworth 95 is so fucking hot.
Mr Darcy (1995):
Colin Firth (1995) is book Darcy brought to life. He uses tiny gestures and looks to communicate with us and Elizabeth… his struggle is so subtle but so palpable. A beautiful asshole with a creamy nougat center. Just perfect.
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Those heart-eyes right up above☝️? Hot!
Passive-agressively drinking tea? Hot!
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The way he rushes over to see Elizabeth at Pemberley on those delicious long legs of his with that slutty wet curl hanging over his forehead? Hot!
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Fencing? Hot!
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The way he is so concerned about Elizabeth crying and takes her hand even though he shouldn't? Hot!
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This dimple-y smile of pure joy because he knows he's married to Elizabeth freaking Bennet? Hot!
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Colin Firth Darcy is simultaneously immaculately put together and entirely falling apart internally. The wet shirt scene is so iconic not (only) because ‘oooh almost-shirtless sexy man’, but because it’s a metaphor for how he’s absolutely falling apart!!! This is a private moment, when he doesn’t think anyone can see him. And then he bumps. into. Lizzie. At his house!! And the entire sequence that follows with him rushing out still doing his jacket up to catch her before he leaves. They are both on the back foot and it’s THAT moment of confusion that opens a more honest dialogue between them.
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Without Firth in a lake you wouldn’t get Macfadyen in a downpour!
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There's a reason why Colin Firth is forever known as Mr. Darcy above all other roles he's had and will have! Even ignoring the wet white shirt, which has become A Thing now, he is so hot with his curly hair and his little half smiles and his intense looks of longing and his legs that go on for milessss.
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This cannot be real. My fellow Jane Austen people. Without Colin Firth’s Darcy we wouldn’t have 90% of modern JA content. He opened a door and there was no turning back for modern culture. There would be no MacFadyen standing half undressed in a field at dawn without Firth jumping into a lake first. There would be no hand flex if there hadn’t been Firth doing his best impression of a man undressing Elizabeth Bennet with his eyes and hating himself for liking it. There would be no Bridgerton without Bridget Jones. Let’s face it people. We wouldn’t be here having these arguments if Colin Firth had not been Mr Darcy.
Colin Firth understood Mr. Darcy in a way no other actor ever has. He is awkward as fuck in a way that comes across as snooty and judgmental on a first watch-through, then can be read as awkward and longing on a second time. His performance had such depth while looking extremely shallow at first glance. This man WAS Mr. Darcy. (I love 2005, as well, and I love Matthew McFayden, but he was awkward for awkward sake.) Colin Firth made Darcy's awkward look snooty and aloof.
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THE socially awkward Darcy is the 1995 Darcy - look at him coming and sitting in awkward silence with Elizabeth pointedly asking her if she wants to live a long way from her family (to obvious relief) and then abruptly leaving - vote for him please 😭😭😭😭
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Colin Firth served so much as Darcy that when they did Bridget Jone's diary, they brought him back.... AS DARCY. The smoulder. The angst. The man is the quintessential Darcy.
“Firthing” is an actual term that is used now to describe someone yearning intensely. It is named after Colin Firth’s Mr Darcy performance.
Colin Firth all the way. He's known in our household as Owl Eyes because in every frame he's mooning over Elizabeth Bennet. Unsurpassable, unmatched, golden television (and some of the worst dancing you've ever seen).
Colin has beautiful, touchable curls.
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My high school English teacher was very into using movies to teach alongside literature, which was a great teaching tool. When we read Pride and Prejudice, he used both 2005 and 1995 for various scenes. What stands out to me all these years later was when it got to the part when Lizzy went to help Georgiana after Caroline dropped Mr. Wickham's name and Darcy gives Lizzy this look:
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My teacher stopped the film and pointed at Darcy's face and said, "See that? That is THE look. If someone ever looks at you like that, you know they're in love." And what is hotter than that?
Also this teacher had two cats named Lizzy and Darcy. Not relevant to the poll but I wanted you all to know about them.
Colin Firth dazzles and amazes in the nuanced performance that just blows all other attempts away.
The best thing about the Colin Firth wet shirt scene is actually the scene that follows where him and Lizzie are both just dyinggg of embarrassment but Darcy pulls himself together refuses to lose his advantage and runs to get dressed and chase her down before she leaves - just the mix of cringe and hopefulness at seeing her again is so well done and so attractive!!! (this is just the bit where he's running after her but I love it all!)
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nebbyy · 2 months
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Please write a fanfic about King Baldwin IV from KoH, where he fell in love with female reader. The plot is up to you. Please make it a serious love story with slight fluff 🤗🤭
Baldwin IV x reader - Life always comes down to a game of chess
A/N: You have no idea how much I love you anon, this was one of the prompts I already wanted to write omgggg!! For this fic I kinda got inspired by this painting (which, for everyone interested, it’s “La belle dame sans merci” by Frank Dicksee), and you’ll see how and why reading it;)
Summary: King Baldwin IV receives an offer from an Italian nobleman to marry his daughter; unsure of whether to accept or not this compelling offer, Baldwin decides to do what he does best…
Warning: there are some mentions of christianity and religious references along with some hints at the misogynistic ideologies of the time (about the woman being “owned” by the dominant male figure in her life) ((I don’t condone this ideology at all but I thought it’d be fitting to add it anyway to give some accuracy to it)).
Word count: 2637
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King Baldwin couldn’t quite wrap his head around you. The day that he was informed of your engagement, he felt himself quite skeptical of the idea of marrying someone. After all, ever since his leprosy had been diagnosed he had to get used to the idea of living a life of solitude, forced into a lifelong chastity, for no sane man would ever marry off their daughter to a leper. With time, he had found solace in nurturing his own knowledge and virtue, elevating himself to a level of wisdom that very few could boast at his young age.
During the following days, the young king's mind was plagued with thoughts, considerations he was making to weigh the choice. The benefits of marrying Lady Y/N were many, first and foremost securing a connection to the land of Italian speakers, allowing for easier trafficking of crusaders arriving in the Holy Land, not to mention the abundance that would be the young lady's dowry. And not only did marrying her mean strengthening the economical side of his reign, but it also meant giving the impression to the public that the king's health condition was improving to such an extent that he considered that to be an ideal time to marry. His most trusted men and all of his advisors kept repeating to him, marrying Lady Y/N would’ve been  comparable to a blessing.
But despite all the benefits this union seemed like it would bring, Baldwin continued to hesitate to make a decision. What left him so undecided was the possibility that this was some kind of deception, a conspiracy orchestrated against him, hidden in the form of the most convenient of marriages. It was up to him to decide whether it was worth taking these risks in favor of the benefits that would come if his concerns turned out to be unfounded. 
Like everything else in his life, this choice came down to a game of chess…
It was this idea that prompted him to make a decision. Baldwin had a messenger called, to be sent to Pisa to give the news to Lord Y/F/N that the king wished to report his decision to him live, at his court. For the lord to arrive it would have to wait, but Baldwin has always been a man of exceptional patience.
Four months passed, when at the dawn of Lent it was announced by a Pisan messenger that Lord Y/F/N and his daughter had come to Acre, and would soon be coming to Jerusalem. Another week passed before father and daughter, riding two white horses and accompanied by an escort of knights arrived at the royal palace.
When he first saw you, Baldwin could have sworn he saw Mary himself. You walked with such grace that you almost seemed to float. Your face looked serene, despite the anxiety that had been devouring you from within ever since the day the invitation from the king of Jerusalem reached you; a blue veil covered your hair, framing your face and falling over your shoulders. You bowed to Baldwin as was proper to do before a king, yet he felt so tempted to interrupt you, prevent you from bowing to him, perhaps even bowing to you himself.
At that moment he felt like Lancelot before Guinevere, completely mesmerized by your beauty, one who seemed more fit to an angel than a woman. But, he gave no sign of his true emotional state; after all, a gorgeous woman does not mean she can be fit to serve as queen. Her answer will be decided when she has had a chance to hear you speak, away from the judgmental stares of the court, free from any influence that might change what you really think.
As the sun shone bright in the sky, the banquet took place inside of the palace. The king excused himself before going to eat by himself in his chambers as usual, leaving his guests in the company of his sisters and his court. Loud chatter filled the room, goblets were raised to get more wine poured, courses flowed onto the set table, a tribute to thank Lord Y/F/N for making such a journey to fulfill the king's request. All this noise, yet in your ears all became quiet when a servant approached your chair, whispering a few simple words, "The king has requested your presence at dinner."
Your blood froze in your veins in surprise, and you could almost feel your father's thrill as you rose from your seat, having the servant guide you toward the king's study. Walking through the halls of the palace, you could do nothing but feel so small in comparison, you almost seemed to disappear, enveloped by the magnificence of everything around you that, if all went well, you would have called your own.
You were brought back to reality when the heavy doors of the king's room were opened by the two guards who stood at his sides. An enveloping fragrance, a mixture of myrrh and frankincense filled your senses with a feeling of serenity, an almost familiar feeling. In the center of the room, a hooded figure, dressed in silk as white as snow. "Come forward, my lady. I apologize for my absence at the table but," she interjected for a moment, rising from her seat and revealing her face-or at least, what was not covered by the veil-"many might find my appearance somewhat...disturbing during a meal." He chuckled a little at that last part. You wondered if irony had become a kind of means for him to soften his own hellish condition. 
As soon as he turned around you could not help but study the appearance of what will hopefully be your future husband. Rumors about his condition had been swirling since the day he was crowned, so you had been prepared to be confronted with a horrifically disfigured man. Instead, although part of his face was covered by the thin veil, it was like an instinct for you to try to study his features. You could vaguely make out the golden hair that adorned his face, although it was covered by the veil. His voice had intrigued you; it sounded so jovial and yet so deep. A melody that sang of the young monarch's endeavors. It intrigued you, you wondered what his lips looked like, whether they matched the sound of his voice.
But what really caught your interest were his eyes. They were blue, but of a color so deep, so intense, it reminded you of tales you had heard about the northern seas, of the waters that dark and deep seemed to beckon sailors, to lead them to drown within them. Likewise you felt mesmerized by such intensity. And you wondered, how much of this would remain the same as his illness progressed.
You recovered from that momentary trance, wasting no time to bow, but this time Baldwin stopped you before you were able to bow more than your head: "Don't bow, please. Such reverences are not necessary here." You looked at him a little dumbfounded, but despite the king's unusual attitude you did not object. He stepped to the side, revealing a finely decorated chessboard, with all the pawns already set in place. "Do you play?" he asked softly, and you finally mustered up the courage to speak "It's been some time since I last did," as you approached the table, taking your seat opposite Baldwin. He took his seat again, and for the first time in your life you found yourself face to face with a king. 
You quickly realised that he had assigned you the white pawns, the small courtesy of moving you first. You took a moment to think of an initial strategy, and moved your first pawn. A horse. Baldwin raised his eyebrows, surprised by your decision. "Aren't you going to move the pawns first?" You kept your gaze on the chessboard, partly out of respect and partly out of fear, still unsure why the king would call you to his chambers, if indeed it was all just to have a playmate. "I always prefer to start with the horse. I like to think that the pawns would be frightened to charge against the enemy without a knight to guide them." You looked up, meeting his eyes that studied you intrigued. Chuckling at what you had just said, you continued, shaking your head slightly, "Forgive me, it was just a silly thought."
"Not at all, my lady," he replied, studying your every detail, "I find it fascinating." It was his turn to move, and as per rule, he moved one of the pawns, the one in front of the queen. "So you think good leadership is better than letting the individual decide for himself?" There was a spark that had lit up in his eyes, something playful. It was clear that you were intriguing him, surprisingly in your eyes, since you had been instructed to stay behind your father's shadow, not to express your thoughts or externalize your ideologies.
Everything had to be perfect, one could not risk the futile mind of a young woman ruining the marriage that would have been so beneficial to her dukedom, but above all to her family. Yet at that moment she felt that expressing what resided in her own mind was exactly what Baldwin wanted from her. Something lit up in her too, and he in turn caught the same spark in her eyes. Could it be that she had figured out the trick...? 
Another pawn moved, it was Baldwin's turn to move again. Your eyes seldom parted from each other, just for that moment necessary to make your own move. "Independence is not always what benefits a man. Certainly, it is tempting, but in moments of indecision it risks leading to oblivion. An infantryman needs a leader, a young man who is lost in the woods needs a hunter to guide him out..." Another move, the white bishop points directly at the black king "...an indecisive man needs an outside opinion to make his decision."
You smiled, and like the sweetest of plagues you infected him too. You had deciphered his little deception. An innocent deception, with the purpose of seeing with your own eyes how you, in a condition so similar to what is the duty of a sovereign, would have acted. 
After all, his life always came down to a game of chess....
"So you understood..." Baldwin whispered, again sitting in his place. For the first time in his memory, someone had managed to leave him speechless. His witty mind seemed to have died out all of a sudden, the knight in him unarmed by the woman sitting in front of him. Maybe the deception wasn’t as occult as he had planned, or maybe this young lady was really able to stand up to him.
You smiled at him proudly, be proud of your intuition but also relieved that your thought had not turned out to be foolish. Your pride had removed from your mind every rule, every admonition that had been given to you from the moment you set foot in the Holy Land; your mind was now like a river in flood, finally free to flow out according to its natural course. "I do not blame you, my lord. I realize that this is a difficult choice for you, and that the factors at stake go far beyond your individual will."
"And what do you think about that?" Your smile acquired a bittersweet scent, and you answered without almost hesitation: "I am only a woman, my will is that of my father and it will be of my husband. My family prays that this role will be filled by you, and for this to happen I have been instructed to be fit to reign at your side."
“That I can clearly see, but what truly urges me is to know what your own will says. If we were to marry, you would be the bride to a wretched man, one whose fate has already been announced by God. My demise won't be far off, you’ll be left a widow in a foreign land. And before this… curse gets the better of me, there is no saying that it won’t get to you too. If it did, you would suffer the same fate I had been given.”
It took you a moment to let his words sink into your mind. He spoke the truth, a future with him would be filled with sickness and uncertainty; you would have to live in a court far from your home, where everyone was waiting for the king’s death like a flock of crows flying above a dying man. You took a deep breath, feeling as everything came down to this very moment. “I won’t lie to you, my lord, the future that awaits me while standing by your side is not an easy one by any means, and I’m very much aware of that. I do not expect my future to be easy, for it would be an excess of greed. So if I can have a saying in my own future, I’d like to say that I would much rather all the time that is given to me by the Lord standing by the side of a man filled with virtue, than by the side of a man too full of himself to see anything just an inch away from his reflection. There would be no greater honor for me than to stand by your side, for as long as you still have to live, my lord. And if I ever was to catch this disease as well, then I would have no other words to say other than God wills it.“
At your words, the young king had to shake himself up, now more than ever necessary for him to say something, anything really. “For you, my lady, I shall always be just Baldwin.” His tone was softer than ever, a soft breeze that reached to you and whispered I am but yours now. It was unsaid, but decided. Once this meeting would be over, the king would come to your father, and confirm his decision to accept the proposal. Only problem was, this meeting seemed to have become endless. What was supposed to be a quick meal, accompanied by a game of chess, turned into a lively exchange of political views, then silly childhood anecdotes, then again into a walk in the inner courtyard of the palace. Baldwin tried hard to keep you in his presence for as long as was deemed decent for an unmarried man and woman. He kept you with him as long as he could, and when that was no longer possible, he led you back into the great hall, gently holding your hand over his. Soon after the announcement of your engagement, the wedding was set to happen during the following Easter, and the banquet made in honor of his guests was prolonged until the sun had been long set, this time in honor of his betrothed.
You think back to that day fondly, as you lay on your bed, in the comfort of silky sheets and soft pillows. One of your hands holds your head while the others traces the patterns of the scars in your husband’s face that have considerably worsened during the years. Aside from the bed, sitting on a table, forgotten as long as the night reigned over Jerusalem, were two crowns, along with two chess pawns. A white queen and a black king. Both came from the set that had been used the day the two of you met, a reminder for Baldwin of the day God had merged your destinies in one.
A/N: wowww that came out longer than I though oopss. ANYWAY, this was my interpretation of your request, anon, hope you like it!! Also, for everyone who’s gonna read this, feel free to leave any constructive criticism since this is my first fic and I would like to improve a looot more in my writing skills. That’s it now have a nice day y’all <3<3
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v3lvieraven · 3 months
Text
Twisted wonderland boys x sleepy!reader
Note- in this context it’s just that your constantly sleepy. But I didn’t add ortho.
Riddle-
Honestly he’s very worried, but also finds it endearing how you cling to him all the time. He likes the fact he’s the one you go to when you get sleepy. Makes it a very big deal to everyone around him when your asleep, telling them to be quiet or else they might lose their head. Generally if it’s during class though, he will try to wake you up or help you focus. But he knows you can’t help it at all, so on those rare occasions he gives in, he will take notes for you and scold you after. Your punishment is getting a full nights sleep with him.
Trey-
He loves it, often times he finds you asleep while he’s baking something for the queen. It’s always a lovely surprise for him to find you in a place he loves being. Many times he had to redirect riddle so that you were not in his line of sight, considering you would get a scolding session. There’s many times that he’s saved you from riddle in that regard, your very lucky trey is riddles best friend.
Cater-
He absolutely loves taking pictures of you when you’d asleep (if your okay with it of course). If your okay with him taking pictures, then he might post a few. But majority are saved in a private folder. He brags about it a lot too, and will actively make sure you hear him bragging about how cute you are. Even before you have an established relationship he would seek you out so he could fawn over you. He’s definitely like Leona/Floyd in the sense that he will use you as a teddy bear
Ace-
He’s going to complain a lot, and make fun of you. No doubt. He finds it annoying at first, but once you get to know each other, he begins to love it. He definitely tells you that he hates your sleepy face, but he has so many pictures. Also he’ll tell you that he doesn’t want to carry you around, but he insists even when you tell him he doesn’t have to.
Deuce-
He finds you so adorable. Beats up everyone who makes fun of you. Despite him thinking it’s adorable, he will make sure that it’s not a mental health problem or a health problem.. just wants you to be healthy in every way possible. Still, he defends you and makes sure to keep an eye on you so you don’t fall over or pass out. He may not be as affectionate as ace, but he will still pull you onto his lap often.
Leona-
Lazy ass lion. He has the audacity to call you lazy! I think you probably stepped on his tail, then when he was yelling at you, you thought of him as a stuffed animal because of the ears and cuddled him. You were too tired to realize what you were doing, and the best part is he let you. Now he drags you to the garden to be his stuffed animal. He gets very possessive and won’t let you sleep near anyone else.
Ruggie-
He also finds it endearing, although he doesn’t have much time to spare, he will coddle you and fawn over you like cater. But he expects something in return for looking after you while your asleep, often makes you take him on lunch dates. Teases you about your sleepy face but immediately starts pouting when you stop.
Jack-
He’s flustered, big strong wolf boy is turned into a needy puppy in your hands. Every time you cuddle up to him during class, whether it’s because the class is boring or because your tired and the room is cold, he always gets startled. You thought you were bothering him and stopped which caused him to be even more needy.
Azul-
His sleep schedule was absolutely fucked up. So your sleepy personality actually really helped when you whined for him to take a break and take a nap. Almost made you sign a contract to only take naps with him, and is still considering it. Probably asks you about it though, if you say yes he will be ecstatic. Due to his workload he’s often pent up, in need of relaxation! Meaning you are his perfect match
Jade-
Jade teases you all the time without relent. He loves it so much how could he not! But only he’s allowed to make fun of you for it, no one else. If your sensitive then he will try to tone it down though. I can imagine that he took you in a wagon while he was looking for mushrooms. That’s been stuck in my head all day, him just pulling your sleeping form around in a wagon.
Floyd-
He’s too energetic for his own good! Like I said earlier, he will use you as a stuffed animal. Hauling you around campus and really anywhere he goes while hugging you. Bites you to wake you up or make you focus and pay attention to him. He hates that he has to chase after your focus but it’s all worth it when your half-glaring at him but are too tired to do anything. It’s very cute!
Kalim-
Also is too energetic for his own good! Will scream in delight when you lay your head on his shoulder. But he’s a sweetheart about it, may or may not carry a pillow around for you so that your neck won’t hurt when taking a nap. Unfortunately that’s not very good when the teacher can clearly see the pillow and it definitely makes you stand out.
Jamil-
He’s more calm about it, he wants you to do well in school, so he might scold you or “monitor” you while you sleep. It’s kinda creepy, most of the time he does that thing where he stays there and cuddles with you until you fall asleep. That’s until he figures out that it backfires because now you wake up whenever he leaves…
Vil-
Oh dear, this will not do! Your hair is a mess, and while it may look cute like that you need to brush it out. He will scold you lightly but only because he’s worried about you. Rook managed to convince him to do your makeup while your asleep, he kept those photos as his wallpaper. But overall he loves you deeply, even if you constantly sleep on top of him when he’s supposed to be doing something…
Rook-
He will find out what is causing this. No matter what. It doesn’t matter if it’s a health problem that he can’t entirely fix, or if it’s just something like lack of sleep or insomnia, maybe narcolepsy. He wants to know if he can help. He still teases you, but that’s mostly to mask his worry. Will slip in little reminders to take care of yourself.
Epel-
He isn’t one to like cute things, but your the exception! He likes how calm you are! (I figure him as a person who likes either a very calm/tired person or an energetic partner. No in between) Honestly he likes how easy going you are, sometimes he feels like his life is too intense and you help level that. Draws on you in your sleep, but also makes sure you take care of yourself.
Idia-
Aw your so cute! You look like those anime girls that sleep all the time. Honestly he loves it, the only part he dislikes is when you don’t eat or drink because of exhaustion. He cares a lot for you though, enough that he will pause his game or let himself lose because you need something.
Malleus-
Lovely dragon boy, adorable dragon boy. He’s so in love, feels honored that you trust him enough to be in such a vulnerable state around him. That being said, he will make sure under no circumstances you don’t get woken up. Unless you need to eat or drink or shower and stuff like that. Sebek is prohibited from being around you when your in this state, specifically because he started yelling at you when you were sleeping on malleus’s lap. It stormed that night.
Lilia-
Aw you are so adorable! He could just hang upside-down with you! He’s done that as well, sometimes you don’t wake up and he gets all giddy. Almost dropped you… he scares you awake though, mainly because he finds it so cute with the face you make when you get startled.
Sebek-
I’m not even gonna lie, you arnt getting any naps in around him. It happens once in a while, those times are very special. It only happens when he’s sleepy or when your sick. That’s when he allows himself to be affectionate and cut loose. Mainly he will hold your hand while you sleep or he might play with your hair, but that’s about it. It’s not that he hates physical affection he’s just not used to it.
Sliver-
Immediately falls in love. If he’s the one that’s more tired, your stuck with waking him up and hauling him around with you when needed. He won’t object though, just make sure you cuddle him later to make up for it. Really hates when his sleep is disrupted but when it comes to you, it’s a lot better. If your the one that’s more sleepy, then it kinda depends. You’re either screwed or you’re being dragged with him wherever he goes. Says he sleeps better with you
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doobea · 8 months
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WHEN THE SUN RISES - SAE ITOSHI
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synopsis: You have doubts about your relationship. Sae provides reassurance.
contents: early established relationship, gn!reader, fluff, reader is a tad insecure, mentions of other couples and pda, talks about all things mushy with love word count: 1.1K a/n: waaahh cant believe i didn't post anything for my husband on his birthday im so terrible - this is something short and sweet ;-; i haven't posted anything in a bit bc I've been so tired lately LOL
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You have doubts. 
Doubts about your work performance, test scores, your friendships, and sometimes the future — you know, the less important things. 
Your least favorite doubts are the ones about you and Sae. 
He’s not a bad boyfriend by any means. You’ve been dating each other for a while now, just shy of six months, and it’s been going well. Like any other college couple, you spend your free time together either marathoning a shitty reality TV show, studying, or eating at the local diners near campus once in a while for a ‘fancy’ burger and pizza date night (which Sae hates, by the way, but he goes because there’s nothing better around). You don’t blame him for these doubts because it’s just the way he is. You’ve always known this, along with everyone else around you. 
“Itoshi Sae? Yeah, he’s pretty cold and blunt.” They’d say in a hushed whisper. 
Another would agree, followed by an exaggerated shiver. “I heard even professors are scared of him.”
They’re annoying rumors and passing comments you've gotten somewhat used to. So you don’t blame the gossipers at your school either. Who you do blame are all the couples you would see, whether it’d be at school, at the grocery store, and sometimes even your own parents. Seeing things like holding hands, hugging, and even kissing each other goodbye sets something weird off in your chest.
And, well, you’ve known Sae for a while. You know that maybe he isn’t the type to be comfortable with these things, especially in public. And maybe you’re not going to guilt trip him into doing things that are out of his ordinary. But here’s the problem.
You do want to experience all of it.
“Sae?”
“Hm?”
“Do you like me?”
Your question throws him off just a tiny bit. He fumbles slightly with his flow of writing before catching himself and throws you a questioning look from across the table. 
It’s the midterm season so every floor at the university’s library is packed. All but the top floor, which is mainly reserved for graduate students, who are rarely even on-site. So you two manage to snag a booth in the corner by the bathrooms and water fountain. You’ve been studying for about two hours straight and the thought of going over the rules of the Krebs cycle again haunts you so you let your doubts take over. Hence, why you blurted out the question that’s been burning on your mind for the past week. 
“I do, why do you ask?” He doesn’t sound bothered by it, so you take that as a good sign.
But how do you go about asking him to show that? Maybe asking upfront would be too demanding right now. You decide to dance around the subject a little more.
There’s a moment in silence, your eyebrows creased in deep thought before you finally speak, voice clumsy and almost rough sounding. “When did you realize you liked me?”
He answers without missing a beat, eyes never leaving his notebook. “Dunno.”
Well, that wasn’t the answer you were expecting. 
“Huh?”
“What?” Sae breaks his focus and stares at you, as if you were the one who had said something weird. “You asked and I answered.”
“You have to explain with that sorta question, you know?”
In just the tiniest of motions, Sae frowns. He’s holding his breath for a few seconds in preparation and his eyes soften. “I’m not sure when I fell in love with you.”
Woah—wait love? This is also not what you were expecting out of this conversation either. Is it too late to go back to studying now?
Sae picks up the worried look on your face and manages a soft chuckle. “You know when the sun rises?”
You’re patting your face with your hands now, hoping to eliminate the burn on your cheeks. The sweat forming in your palms doesn’t help at all. And, frankly, you’re confused by his question. “Um, between six and seven?”
“Well, yeah,” he laughs again and you’re not sure if that was the answer he was looking for. “But it always rises, right?”
“Right,” you say slowly, still confused by what he’s trying to get at.
“I’m not sure when I fell in love but whenever the sun rises, it reminds me of you,” Sae explains with a leveled expression, ignoring the little surprised squeaks from your direction. “It’s been like that for a while now and brings me comfort whenever I do wake up early to see it rising.”
“Did you get that line from a K-drama or something?”
He rolls his eyes and fake scoffs. “Thought you wanted an explanation?”
“Well,” you bite back a giggle and continue, “you never struck me as a metaphor type of guy.”
“And you never struck me as the jealous type.” 
You grow hotter because wow guess you haven’t been that great at hiding away your feelings—or maybe your boyfriend is just that good at being perceptive as he is being a top honor student. “Was it that obvious?”
“When you’re looking at other couples and grumbling right after then yeah, it’s pretty obvious.” Sae’s tone doesn’t carry any ounce of tease and he gives you a fond look. It makes you feel slightly guilty and embarrassed. 
You shrink deeper into the booth, holding your textbook up to your face. “Sorry…”
The seat next to you dips and a familiar pair of hands gently snatches the book away from you, revealing Sae’s rare soft expression again. 
“Don’t be,” He reaches over to ruffle your hair before moving his laptop and notebook over to your side. “Plus, you shouldn’t worry that much, I’ll always be with you.”
A pause and then you decide to blurt out your other burning question because things are already out in the open at this point. “Would it be alright if we start doing more couple-ly things together?” 
“Mhm,” he’s about to dive back into studying but stops, humming in thought. “What should we do more?”
“Well, aside from me,” Sae deadpans and you straighten your posture. “Sorry, sorry, what I meant to say is I guess more PDA? Holding hands would be a good start.”
“Okay,” He says quietly and drops his pen, carefully interlacing his fingers with yours.  
Sae’s hands are warm, maybe even sweaty if you’re not mistaken. You look up and oh — his cheeks have the tiniest amount of red on them. Probably no different from the resurgence of warmth you’re currently feeling too.
“Better?” Sae asks and squeezes your hand.
“Yeah, better.” You squeeze back. 
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meowpupp · 4 months
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More of a fluffy/sfw ask—,, puppygirl!reader just wanting to cuddle with everyone. Or being clingy in general. She sees Price sitting idly with his arms spread out on the couch, immediately she jumps on his lap to get a big hug, or it’s night time with pup!Gaz resting on some thick blankets, but on the other hand,,, she wants to make him her pillow! Whether the big mutt likes it or not >:(
To which ends up with Price finding the sweet thing with a content smile, sprawled on top of the other pup who doesn’t mind one bit 🥰🥰🥰
puppygirl!reader who is the most precious, affectionate thing price has ever met. it's almost like you were bred to be adored. big, soft, floppy brown ears, a fluffy tail, thick thighs, and a soft tummy? how could he not spoil you.
ever since he brought you home, you've always craved his touch. he finds it adorable. any moment possible, you're right by his side.
in the morning, when he's making you breakfast, you lean against him. tail rhythmically hitting the back of his leg as you wag it, sleepily nuzzling into his chest. its sweet, melts the vets heart as he soaks up the warmth you always seem to radiate.
it's like you're starved, an addict. any opportunity possible you'll take. price peacefully relaxing on the couch? you're on his lap, nuzzling into his neck, ears twitching and tail wagging as you seek his praise. he almost laughs, amused by how just soft pets and a few small words of praise make you melt.
even when he's away, doing errands or whatever else, you still seek him. he comes home to find you bundled up in his bed. seeking out his scent, his warmth. it's moments like that where he scoops you up, presses a kiss to your forehead, and lays you ontop him.
and if he thought you were clingy with him? well, it's a whole nother world when kyle comes. you're just so excited. price knows you were sheltered practically your whole life. youre already clingy enough with johnny when he visits. but kyle? who lives with you? you can barely contain yourself.
he can see the way you crave kyle affection, following him around the house, seeking him out every half hour. it's funny, one of those moments when he can see how similar to a puppy you really are, trailing after him as if youre lost.
if you're not by prices side, you're cuddled into kyle's. his arm around you, your head on the mutts chest while he watches TV, absentmindedly stroking your soft ears. or even forcing kyle into prices big bed, using his tummy as a pillow. surrounded by the soft warmth of kyle and the comforting scent of your owner.
kyle is always more than happy to indulge. he's not quite as clingy as you, but he thoroughly enjoys the warmth. it's hard being your guard dog, chasing off the other mean mutts that prey on your little self. or snapping at johnny when he holds you a little too rough.
he likes the feeling of being rewarded, the little soft kisses you place all around his face, the way you chrip and giggle happily. it reminds him that you're just a puppy, a cute little thing that needs him. that adores him. and that he adores tenfold.
but your favourite by far is when you get both of them. leaning back against prices chest as he sits, kyle snuggled between your legs on your soft tummy. the whole thing is calm, peaceful. it fills you with warmth, your tail wagging a mile-a-minute, only speeding up when price kisses the back of your head.
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autistichalsin · 4 months
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Halsin and abandonment issues
One thing I've come to conclude about Halsin's character, based on many parts of his story and some lines he says, is that he might have abandonment issues.
To begin with: he lost his entire family over the years to accidents and disease, per his writer. That's the kind of thing that leaves deep scars- watching everyone you love fade away over years, until at a "comparatively young age" you're the last of your family and turned over to the Druids to be taken care of. (His writer didn't specify an age, but if he was young enough to be "turned over to the Druids" instead of "finding his way there" then it is likely he was not an adult.) There's no time to lose your family that isn't absolutely horrible, but as a young person is far, far worse.
Then there's Halsin's other traumas, all of which involve isolation; he was a prisoner for three years in the Underdark, and despite this, no one thought to come looking for him to save him. He lost most of his fellow Druids in the battle against Ketheric Thorm and the Shadow Curse that followed- and what few didn't die, he still lost their friendship to his leadership position, the "weight of responsibility". His one lasting friend in all of this, Thaniel, was lost to the curse and Halsin spent over 100 years blaming himself, fighting to be the best leader he could at the Grove, and having no one at all he could lean on for any of his burdens. And then he wound up kidnapped again, this time by the goblins, and when he returns, almost all his Druids have been turned against him, some even holding him in contempt. All experiences that are isolating in nature and reinforce to him that he can't rely on anyone else, that he is the only person he can depend on, and that in the end, everyone he cares for is going to leave or die.
It's not just speculation that he feels that way, either. He has several lines about his survivor guilt and isolation:
"[...] there is a burden to being the survivor... the witness to others' tragedies. It only grows heavier with time."
"[...] Grim as it is now, it was worse on the day of the battle. A vivid wound upon my memory. I was lucky - I lived, when so many did not. It would take me a day and a night to recite the names of all the friends I lost."
And lines that indicate he's used to being left, too.
If the player rejects him after he wildshapes (emphasis mine):
"Ah, I see. Well, of course. Back to camp then."
Saying "of course" implies it's not entirely unexpected.
After the final battle, if the player declines to have a celebration and says the party should split up:
"It was always destined to be so, if we prevailed. But the foreknowledge makes it no less bittersweet..."
He was expecting the party not to stick together.
Similarly, if a love-interest player breaks up with him in the ending:
"I see... After all my years of living, I know all too well that nothing lasts forever. Yet a parting can sting, nonetheless. But that just means what we shared was precious, and will live on in my memory. Thank you - I am a richer man for having met you."
The "nothing lasts forever" really sells it, to me, especially because the context makes it clear that he isn't just making a general statement- he's talking about relationships and people. Again- he was expecting it all to end.
His worry in the epilogue, when a solo-romanced player comes to the party with him, hints at this even more: "You could have done anything, gone with anyone... yet you chose me."
He's surprised that the player, even if they're in love, would want to live with him and share his dream. He can't believe they really wanted that- he even says that he keeps expecting to "stir from the dream".
I feel like that shows a lot about how Halsin feels after all the loss he's endured- he doesn't ultimately believe anyone is going to stay with him, whether because they choose to leave him, or because they'll die.
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wosoamazing · 3 months
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Too Late To Be Fair
Warnings: death (caused by drunk driver), mentions of emotional abuse (R as a child), mentions of drinking and drunks, implications of self doubt and associated things, wishing someone would die. Please let me know if anything else.
Note: Grace is a fake player, due to previous ideas and maybe future ideas I had to make a player up... she does some things none of the girls would ever do....
A/N: Story inspired by Pray (Jessie Murph) & Mansion (NF) - and other things but I listened to these songs and I was like ooo good story idea. There probs will be a part 2. I hope you like it - also I know I said one of the McFoord fics would be out next but um yeah...
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“Y/N We’re sorry to inform you but your Dad was in a car accident he was hit by a drunk driver” you couldn’t help but laugh at the irony, you dad the drunk being hit by a drunk driver. Everyone looked at you in disbelief.
“Y/N that’s not very appropriate,” Grace said, before others death stared her, clearly not knowing your situation, of course you were going to blow, especially at her, the thing you had wished for, for so long, finally happened, yet just after you cut him off, so it didn’t matter, it didn’t mean you could have an easier childhood, it was just another way of the universe punishing you. Waiting until you had moved out, cut your ties and in the spotlight, to finally kill him. Almost exactly a year since you cut him off, won the trial, got the restraining order, the one which he protested, causing the gruelling 3 day trial, to decide whether it was needed or not.
“Oh, sorry we don’t all have perfect little lives with perfect Mummies and Daddies, some of us actually had a shit childhood, faced real world problems, no rich bitch problems, oh Mummy and Daddy told me to pick up some rubbish, oh my life is shit they abuse me” you were dragged out of the locker room and into an empty physio room by Leah, Beth, Katie, Caitlin, and Steph who all sent you a glare when the door had shut, “Oh like she didn’t deserve it,” they all couldn’t but help let out a smile. There was an awkwardness in the room, as the girls all looked between each other not knowing how to approach this.
“You guys can all go, I’ve got this, thank you though,” Leah spoke, breaking the silence, everyone left except Beth, but Leah didn’t mind. You and Beth had a very close relationship, you had been close friends since your grassroots team, Beth helped you through the year of your life you realised you were gay, and then when you crushed on your now girlfriend, your then national Captain. Beth felt bad the year you told her about your Dad, she knew something was off but you never told anyone, barely anyone stills knows the full story, but that day Beth and you promised that you would be there for each other forever, and that was true, she had been there during your trial and so much more, and you were there for her when Dan broke up with her, Beth was really your rock and you were hers. Beth moved to sit in the chair on the opposite side of the room, giving you both space, whilst also being there in case you needed it. 
“Are you okay?” Leah couldn't find the right words, but she knew deep down the wrong words were what you needed her to say, you weren’t going to break, and release it all otherwise.
“Of course I’m not fucking okay Leah,” you looked up at her, she hadn’t even flinch at your words, instead she pulled you in for a hug. Which caused hot angry tears to fall from your eyes “Why now, why couldn’t it have been a year ago, 3 years, hell any time after I was 12. It’s unfair, its fucking unfair,” you paused, and Leah slowly slid her back down against the wall, bringing you down with her, your legs either side of hers as you sat in her lap. Your eyes connected with her soft kind caring blue eyes, and you could see how her lips formed a soft kind reassuring smile. You broke, big fat tears streamed down your face, as you sobbed, Leah gently pulled your body forward, so you were no longer sitting up, but leaning on her, she placed your head into the crock of her neck, before moving her arm to wrap around you lower body, her other hand was placed on your back, her thumb moving up and down, as she whispered reassuring words in your ear. 
“W-why now, when I’ve already lived the hard life, when I’ve been through all that shit. When I’m already screwed up, when I already have trust issues, when I already doubt myself everyday, so much so that I do it unconsciously” you sobbed into her neck.
“I know baby, it's not fair, and it's not right. But I’m here now, and I’ve got you.”
“I-I I used to wish he would die, I used to imagine cops showing up at the door when it was later than he used to come home, them telling me and me not being upset. I used to hope he just wouldn't come back from work trips. I used to imagine people asking me why I wasn’t upset when he died. I used to think of the fact that he was an alcoholic so he wouldn't get a kidney or liver transplant, unless it was a directed donation. I had to say yes, how could I say no if I was a match, but how could I say yes. You know how fucked up you feel when you think that stuff, you know how messed up I thought I was, but that was all his doing. It's just unfair.”
___
You had calmed back down and decided to go see all the girls again, the only problem was that no one had realised what song was playing in the locker room, too deep in conversation to be aware of it.
Waking up but wishing that you don’t. It’s something that I pray you’ll never know.
A song that connected with you so deeply sent you back over the edge, and you quickly spun on your feet and speed walked away, Beth followed behind you.
“What the actual fuck were you thinking McCabe” you girlfriend yelled.
“Wha?” the room had gone quiet and attention was drawn to the music, “Oh fuck, shit, sorry, we werent listening to it, its just automatically come on. I promise, I wasn't trying to be funny, I wouldn't do anything like that to Y/N”
Leah just turned around packing your bag and hers, “Tell Jonas we’re going home.”
“Sorry” Katie yelled as Leah went down the hall.
Leah found you sitting in the middle of one of the side hallways. Beth’s arms were wrapped around you and your body was shaking.
“Come on baby, let's go home.” She said as she placed a hand on your back, Beth slowly released her arms around you, which Leah quickly replaced with hers.
_____
“What’s on your mind? I know it's something more than your Dad” your girlfriend said as she sat down on the bed next to you, legs crossed and leaning back against the headboard. You had just arrived home.
“It's stupid.” you sighed, looking away from her eyes.
“I promise you, it's not stupid, it's your feelings, and your feelings are valid” she said, voice unwavering before pulling you into her lap.
“I don't know, I just feel like I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.” “What do you mean baby?” “I don't know, I just feel like something is going to happen, like something is going to happen and you’re going to realise that this was all a mistake and leave. You’re going to get sick of constantly being second guessed for no reason just because I’m messed up, because I don’t believe someone could actually love me this much. You’re going to get sick of me, and all my insecurities, ” she pulled your body into hers, your head finding a place in the crock of her neck, tears started to fall from your eyes, causing her neck to become wet.
“Y/N, baby, I love you so much, and I promise, there is not another shoe that will drop, we have been through so much together, we got through those 9 months together, we got through the trial together, and I promise we will get through whatever life throws at us together, forever, we will go through the highs and lows together. I love you so much, and I wouldn't want to spend my life with anyone else. I will never hurt you, I promise.” 
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honeybeefae · 9 months
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Potions (Eris Vanserra x Reader)
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Eris Week Day Two: Heir
Summary// A recent concoction has hit the fae market that is said to bring about your primal instincts to help fertility. When Eris first suggests it you laugh, thinking it is just another herb or supplement that will fail, until you both drink and realize just how primal it turns you.
(This is hot, filthy, dirty, just primal smut. I’m talking about knotting, A/B/O, breeding, fucking. If that’s not your vibe then you have been warned and if it is, well, we should definitely be friends. Enjoy!)
@erisweek2023
WARNINGS: SMUT, Knotting, Primal Play, Aphrodisiacs, Breeding, A/B/O Dynamics, Slight Cum Inflation?,  I don’t want to spoil anything else but it is dirty. 
With how hard fae pregnancies are to come by it is a wonder that something like this hadn’t been made sooner. Eris had had it delivered to him by one of his healers and advisors, their eyes sparkling at the idea of an heir being conceived with the special potion made by the healer himself. 
At first, Eris hadn’t even wanted to bring it to you, knowing how difficult it was for you month after month of not becoming pregnant, but as he saw you grow sadder each week he finally caved.
 This is how the two of you came to be sitting in the quiet of your secluded cabin, away from the court’s gossip and stares, with the heart-shaped bottle resting on the table between the two of you. 
“So what is this supposed to do exactly?” You ask quietly, gingerly picking it up and watching as the dark red liquid swirled from the movement of your shaky hands. “And how is this any different from the other herbs and medicines the healer has already been giving me?”
“It is said to call upon our basic, primal instincts to help with the conceiving part,” Eris explained again, blowing air out of his mouth. “I’m not sure exactly how it works or what it does but that is how it was explained to me.”
“And do you think it will work?”
“I think there is only one way to find out.”
You frown, contemplating, before twisting open the top and popping the cork. Eris stands and grabs two small glasses which you pour into. The smell is sickly sweet, almost like cherry medicine, and you try your best not to wince as you bring it up to your mouth. 
“Can we agree before we drink this that if it does not work…we just try not to worry about it? Conceiving, I mean.” Eris says softly, watching you with concern. “I know how much this has been bothering you and I do not want you to feel pressured or think that I am angry with you. These things take time and this drink, at most, is probably just going to be a fun night of sex for us. Nothing more.”
“I know I’ve been struggling I just,” You sigh, your eyes looking down. “I’m so ready to have a child and I know your advisors, the court, and even your mother have been pressing me for when I will finally have one. I just feel like I’m letting everyone down.”
He reaches out for you and grabs your free hand, squeezing it as he says, “You could never let anyone down, Y/N. I cannot say I know the pressures of being a woman in this circumstance but I can imagine them. Just please know that no matter what happens, whether it works or not, I love you and I do not care if I have to wait forever or even if it never happens. All I want is your happiness.”
You give him a sincere smile, tightening your fingers around his as you hold your glass out for him to clink. “Cheers then…to at least a long night of fucking each other.”
“Cheers, little fox.” Eris grins, giving you a flirty wink before downing the potion as you follow his lead. “It certainly tastes…interesting.”
“Nasty,” You blanch, your nose scrunching in disgust. “It tastes nasty.”
“Well the healer is probably more attuned at creating medicines than he is flavorful potions I would assume.” He shrugs, lounging back on the couch and patting his lap. “Why don’t you come over here and sit with me while we wait and see what this does?”
You don’t need to be asked twice as you shimmy over the table and crawl onto him, nuzzling your face into his neck as he kisses your temple and runs his fingers through your hair. It is sweet, domestic, and you savor it as you kiss his neck. 
“I do wonder what it means about becoming primal…” Eris muses. “Do you think it will make us mindless beasts? Just rutting into each other?”
A giggle escapes your lips as you raise your head to look at him, rolling your eyes as he smirks. “I think it will do the same as the other medicines have and slightly, slightly, raise our libido. Though I do not think we need help with that.”
He grins wolfishly and cups the back of your head, bringing your lips to his as he kisses you slowly. His lips never fail to take your breath away as they move against your own, molding perfectly together as you tilt your head to deepen the kiss. Pleasant tingles are going from your scalp to your toes as you swipe your tongue against his.
“Mmmm,” Eris growls, his hands grasping your hips while you teasingly grind down onto him. You were surprised at how wet you were already becoming, feeling the wet spot growing in your underwear. “It’s not nice to tease, little fox.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, my lord.” You smile against his mouth, your skin starting to feel clammy as you pull back for a moment. “Are you hot? Like sweaty?”
“I’m a little warm…” He trails off, looking down in surprise to see his white shirt almost completely soaked through. “What the hell?”
“Is it the potion? Is it like an allergic reaction?” You stand, touching the back of your neck which is slick with sweat. “Stars I’m the same way-what is that smell?”
You sniff at the air, trying to find the intoxicating smell that was starting to drive you insane. It was like you were one of his hounds are you bent down over Eris who was still looking down at his shirt, finding the source right at the pulse point of his neck. “Fuck Eris, you smell so good.”
Another warm gush of wetness coated your outer lips and thighs as you licked him from the hollow of his throat to the base of his ear, tasting the mix of pheromones and sweat while he abruptly pushed you off and stood. You felt like you were in a daze as you looked up at him, hurt and confused before you saw what had him freaking out. 
Eris’s hair was growing thicker, and coarser, while his body seemed to swell slightly in the muscles and planes of his chest. He raises his hands as you watch his nails become sharper and pointer, almost like claws, as he whispers, “I don’t know what’s happening to me…”
Your eyes trail up as he starts to lick his lips and his teeth, curling his top lip to show off his canines as they also become sharp. His amber eyes turn to gold as he stumbles back, tearing at his clothes until they were scraps on the floor, and unleashing the full change to your view. 
“Eris, what’s wrong? What’s happening?” Your tone is full of worry before your mouth drops open at the sight of his bare body, seeing the hair that has grown on his chest, forearms, and thighs, as your gaze finally falls to his cock.
It was already long and thick before but now, with whatever the medicine was doing, it had become even bigger. You could see the veins throbbing as he became hard under your eyes, the head an angry read as it hit just under his belly button. However, that isn’t the most concerning thing as you see a knot form just underneath his dick. 
A large, throbbing knot.
“Oh my gods.” You breathe, eyes wide, as you look back into his eyes. The man before you was no longer your Eris, no longer the High Lord of Autumn. No, this was a beast. A red, hungry beast who was watching you like a fox would its prey.
“I’ve never felt like this before…” He growls, even his voice an octave lower and gravelly while he licks his lips and stares at you. 
“Like what?” You question breathlessly.
“Like I want to fuck you until you’re overflowing with my cum, your womb stuffed as I drain every last drop into that pretty fucking cunt.”
Before you could fully react to it Eris had stomped over to you and ripped off your clothes, letting them fall to the floor it tatters as he grabbed a fistful of your hair and yanked. You whined loudly, looking up at him as he fisted his cock and slapped it against your cheek roughly. “Suck it, pup. Take this hot, thick dick down your throat like a good girl.”
You opened for him without hesitation, gagging as he rutted into your face until the tip of his cock was hitting the back of your throat. Normally Eris would check in on you before being rough, making sure you were okay, but this wasn’t Eris. He had no qualms about your comfort as he threw his head back and groaned loudly.
And as you took it, as you slobbered all over him, you realized you liked it. 
The way he was treating you, the way he smelled, the knot, everything was driving you fucking wild. You were sure you were dripping onto the couch as he used your mouth for his pleasure. It was so hot and you could feel your mind going blank as you lost yourself in the experience.
“That’s it, that’s it, FUCK!” He roared as you played with his knot, moaning around him. “Swallow it so fucking deep, pet. Oh, fuck.”
He was throbbing inside your mouth as you ran your tongue over the veins and the underside of his dick, tasting the salty musk of him before he unexpectedly pulled himself out of your mouth. “Hands and knees, slut. Now.”
Eris stroked himself as you quickly clambered into position on the small couch, wiggling your ass in the air to entice him as he took position behind you. He landed a rough smack on your ass before he started thrusting swiftly, his cock desperately trying to find your hole as you shoved a hand down to try and guide him.
It only took a few seconds before he found his mark and you cried out in pain and pleasure as he speared you down on his member, fucking you like an animal. You tried your best to stay upright but Eris shoved a large hand between your shoulders, forcing your face into the pillows as he grabbed your hips and fucked.
“Such a good little breeding whore,” He praised, the sound of his hips smacking against your ass echoing across the cabin. “Such a perfect cock slut for me to use. That’s all you’re good for, right? All for me?”
“Fuck yeah-” You choke out, turning to look back at him which only spurred him on further. “Just for you, Eris. Only you.”
His claws dug into your skin and you swore you could feel him piercing your skin but you couldn’t care, didn’t care, as he fucked you dumb. Both of your juices were making the wettest, sloppiest noise as it dripped out of you and onto the couch. 
You started to rub furiously at your swollen clit, the shockwaves of pleasure overtaking your body as Eris found that spot deep inside of you that had your vision filling with white spots. Moan after moan spilled from your mouth as he chased his release, growling at the feeling of you clenching around him so tightly.
“Cum. Cum for me.” He ordered roughly, dominantly. “Fucking cum all over my cock.”
His words unlocked the gates as you whimpered and cried out his name, your entire body shaking while you hit the best orgasm of your life. You could feel your cum creaming out of you as you buried your face into the pillow, biting down, while he smacked your ass once, twice, and then a third before he stilled inside of you.
The knot was trying to bury itself in your cunt but you were too tight for it to fit which caused massive frustration for Eris as his cum started leaking out of your hole. You winced when he pulled out, yelping when he turned you over to your back and loomed above you.
“You’re wasting it pet,” He tsked, hooking your legs over his shoulders as he came face-to-face with your still-sensitive mound. “Let me fix that for you.”
Your back arched as he took his tongue and started tongue-fucking your abused hole, groaning at the taste of both of your cums mixed together as he desperately tried to fuck it back into you. Both of your hands flew to his head, gripping on for dear life as he moved up to your clit.
He flicked it back and forth with the tip of his tongue, his nails digging into your thighs as you tried to squirm away. “Nuh uh, little fox. You’re staying here until I’m fucking finished breeding you.” Eris growled, pushing two of his fingers into your needy pussy as he started to stretch you out. “I’m going to make sure you’re nice and stretched out for me, ready to take this knot like a good fucking slut.”
“Eris, please,” You whine, your hips rutting up as your sensitivity turns to pleasure again. “Please, I need more.”
“You need more, pet? Need more of this cock?” Eris taunted, pulling away after slurping more of your juices up. “Open your mouth for me.”
You did so quickly, sticking your tongue out as he appeared above your head and spat into your mouth. It was dirty and disgusting but it made you tighten around his fingers, the vulgarity of it only turning you on even more as he smirked. His fangs poked out from his lips as he said, “Dirty whore, you’re enjoying this, aren’t you? Enjoying being treated like a breeding bitch?”
Your head bobs up and down but it isn’t enough for him as he thrusts deeper, harder, and grabs your face painfully. He squeezes, pushing your lips together as his upper lip curls back in a snarl. “Fucking say it.”
“Y-yes I enjoy it!” You admit in a high-pitched voice, groaning when he added a third and fourth finger. “I enjoy being your little breeding bitch, it’s all I want, all I need.”
“Is it what you need, pet? Are you ready to take this knot in this tiny little cunt? Ready for me to fuck you until you’re a drooling, cum-filled cocksleeve?” He stares into your eyes, pupils dilated so big you could hardly see the gold anymore as you whine your agreement. “Then turn back around.”
Eris pulls his fingers out and sucks on them while you get back on all fours, waiting for him to mount you. He watches you, contemplating, before he sits down and yanks you backward roughly. You gasp when he holds you up by your hips with ease, lining up his cock with your pussy before sliding you all the way down.
Both of you moan and close your eyes, the angle making him feel ten times deeper as he orders you to ride him. You place your hands on his shoulders, holding onto them for dear life as you roll your hips. It feels otherworldly and with each thrust down, the head of his dick hits your g-spot with a marksman-like accuracy.
“Ooooh fuck, Eris, you’re so deep,” You cry, biting down on your bottom lip as you throw your head back in pleasure. He growls and jerks your chin back down, your eyes flying open as he kisses you passionately.
“Eyes on me, pet. Don’t you dare fucking look away.” He commands, shifting between your fucked out face and the way your cunt swallows him whole. “Such a pretty pussy taking my cock so well, ready to be bred until your stomach is swollen and your tits are leaking.”
The imagery makes you whine while Eris emphasizes his point by bending down to suck on your tits, your nipples extra sensitive as he nips at them with those long canines. You grip the back of his head, feeling the coarse hair between your fingertips as you continue to bounce up and down on his cock. 
Already you feel as if you are getting close and he can tell, can feel your walls fluttering around him. What little control he had snaps and he grabs your ass roughly, leaning back on the couch as he starts fucking up into you. The only sound in the room being his animalistic growls and wet fucking.
Pain blossoms in your uterus as he goes deeper than ever, hitting your cervix, but you could care less as you wrap your arms around his neck and hold onto him. You can smell his scent again, feeling his racing pulse, and you sink your teeth into it just as your orgasm starts to come to a crescendo.
The tangy taste of blood in your mouth doesn’t deter you as you scream his name loudly, feeling him bite down on the junction of your shoulder as he roars and buries himself knot deep. It slips in with ease this time, locking you together as his hips keep rutting deep into you.
His cum is as hot as fire as it coats your inside, filling you up until you could see your lower stomach start to bulge out from just how much he was pumping inside you. Eris pulled his teeth out of your skin, blood staining his teeth and chin just as yours was, and pressed your foreheads together.
Both of you were panting like dogs as his thrusts finally slowed until he was completely still, though you could still feel his cock throbbing. He brushed the hair away from your neck gently, whispering your name into your ear while you sagged into him exhaustedly. 
“So good, pet, you did so well,” He praised, kissing your temple as you gave him a small smile. “I’m so proud of you for taking it all.”
“Thanks, love.” You whisper while running your fingers down his back lazily. “That was…”
“Amazing?” Eris finished for you, cupping your face gently as you nodded and gazed up at him with half-lidded eyes. “I agree. I guess it was different than everything else we’ve tried.”
“I wouldn’t mind trying it again sometime.” You tease, kissing him for a moment until he pulls back with a knowing smile. “What?”
“Did you think that was it, pet? That I am done with you already?” He tilts his head, running his thumb over your cheek. “No, no, no, no, no. This was just the beginning. I meant what I said about fucking you until the very last drop…and that was just the first pour.”
You gulp, eyes widening, as you feel his knot slowly shrink until it comes out with a wet squelch. Eris smirked as he nuzzled into your neck, taking a deep inhale of your scent, before whispering, “Time to fill you up again, pet.”
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joelscruff · 1 year
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safety (boyfriend's dad!joel x f!reader)
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just a bit of an origin story for my boyfriend's dad!joel relationship. you can read other installments of this fic here. this one isn't smutty but i hope you enjoy 💕 and here's my kofi if you'd like to leave a tip. summary: you find yourself falling for your boyfriend's father. rating: 18+ (mdni) warnings: age difference, cheating, daddy issues, daddy kink, lap sitting, pet names (use of babygirl) word count: 2.2k
the first time your boyfriend's father kisses you, it's because you ask him to.
you've always looked at him a bit differently, always found yourself taking quick peeks out of the corner of your eye whenever he's in the room, given him shy smiles and giggled at all his jokes (most of which were actually funny, believe it or not). the first time you'd met him you'd gone to shake his hand, expecting a firm shake and a quick nod like your own father, but he'd surprised you completely when he'd wrapped you up in his arms, given you a bear hug and softly told you he was so happy to meet you.
your boyfriend always rolls his eyes at his father's affection, his jokes, his quirks. it's been almost disappointing in a way, to see the way his father behaves in comparison to his son. your boyfriend constantly seems to cultivate a cold exterior - and interior, if you're being honest with yourself - while his father radiates warmth and welcomeness, a safeness you've never seen in your own father. you wonder how your boyfriend is able to take such advantage of his father's kindness, that safety that so many people can only crave and never experience.
the two of you fight a lot, but this is normal for you. every relationship you've had - whether familial or romantic - has involved some form of conflict. it's just the way things are; you've come to accept that. the only difference is that before this you never had a third party standing on the outside, witnessing it, worrying about it.
"are you okay?"
the first time he catches you crying you feel embarrassed; until this point you've put on a good front, been your sweet and passive self around him. now he sees a different side of you, the side everyone else in your life has seen dozens of times. the side that hurts, feels pain, suffers.
you nod, leaning against the banister of the front patio and biting your lip, "yeah, i'm fine," your voice cracks and breaks - you're not fine, your boyfriend just berated you for messing up his concentration during one of his stupid games, called you a waste of space. but you're not going to tell his father that.
"you don't look fine," he murmurs, taking a step toward you, "something happen?"
you shake your head, "no really, i'm okay, mr. miller."
"joel," he corrects you softly with a gentle smile, and you try to smile back.
"joel," you repeat, "sorry."
"don't be sorry," he says tenderly, taking another step toward you and carefully placing a hand on your shoulder, "i want you to know...if you ever need to talk to somebody, i'm here. i'll always listen, alright?"
you're not sure what to say; no one has ever given you an offer like that before. it's confusing and surreal. your brow furrows but you slowly nod, "okay."
he gives your shoulder a gentle squeeze and then goes back inside the house, leaving you standing there alone. the ghost of his touch weighs heavily for the rest of the evening, his words echoing in your mind. he can't really mean that, can he?
the next time he sees you cry it's only about a week after the first time, and this time he knows what's wrong. you can see it in his expression, the quiet anger burning behind his glasses for his own son.
"i won't defend him," he tells you softly, sitting next to you on the couch in the living room while your boyfriend yells something incoherent down the hall, "you can talk to me."
you find yourself confiding in him briefly, only briefly. you don't go into much detail, just tell him you hate being made to feel worthless, that it's something you've dealt with for a long time. he touches your shoulder again, squeezes it calmingly, reassuringly. you look into his eyes and feel yourself falling before you can even register it. he cares about you.
you think about him a lot. during the day, nights, when you're in bed and can't sleep and just want somebody to hold you. you imagine his arms wrapped around you, remember that first time you met when he'd hugged you so tight and welcomed you so warmly. you want him to hold you like that again, touch you, love you. you touch yourself and pretend it's his fingers, you bury your face in your pillow as you come and pretend it's his chest.
you think of him when you have sex with your boyfriend. you'd feel bad, but you've started to become numb with the way he treats you, uses you. you close your eyes and curl your hand in his hair and pretend it's his father on top of you, his father inside you, his father kissing your neck.
every week your boyfriend competes in ridiculously boring online competitions; you show up at his house only for the promise of seeing joel, talking to him, sharing a quick moment in the kitchen or living room with him. you sit on your boyfriend's bed and watch from afar as he bangs on the keyboard and shouts aggressive things into his microphone, sounding like a whiny and petulant child. you wonder what you even see in him anymore, what you even saw in him to begin with. you should end it, you know you should. but then how would you see his dad?
he berates you again for messing up his concentration, tells you to leave for a bit and to "stop being so annoying". you don't even protest, just climb off his bed and leave the room, slamming the door louder than necessary behind you.
joel spends a lot of time in his office; he's the head of a contracting company, always making plans, doing paperwork, making phone calls. he has his shit together, another thing you feel drawn to. he's the only person in your life who seems to know exactly what to do in any given situation, knows who he is and where he's going.
you find yourself climbing the stairs and knocking softly on his office door. "come in," he calls from inside, and you slowly push it open.
he looks up from his desk, scattered with paper and blueprints. his brow furrows when he sees it's you, "hey, sweetheart, you alright?"
you close the door behind you and then stand there for a few seconds just staring at him; he's got on a cozy looking grey sweater, knitted and warm. his jeans are dark and his socks are mismatched, a quirk you love. he looks perfectly disheveled in his joel miller sort of way, hair thick and curly, beard scruffy and soft. his glasses accentuate the kindness of his eyes, the tenderness as he looks at you. he's like a comforting beam of light, a safe haven.
"can you hold me?" you ask softly, barely a whisper. it's out before you even know you're saying it, and then you're biting down hard on your lip and feeling tears prick in your eyes.
he seems surprised but only for a moment, then he makes his way toward you in two long strides and wraps his arms around you, pulling you in and holding you close. you melt into his embrace, burying your head in his warm sweater and almost collapsing into his arms, feeling yourself begin to cry steadily. you should feel embarrassed but you're too overwhelmed by the feeling of finally being held by him again, feeling him so close, inhaling the comforting scent of him.
you feel him press a soft kiss to the top of your head, a gesture of comfort and safety, nothing more, "you're okay," he murmurs into your hair, "i've got you."
he holds you like that for a long time and makes no move to let go, just lets you stand there and take what you desperately need from him. your cries die down eventually until you're sniffling lightly into the thick fabric of his sweater and just breathing him in. his hands trail up and down your back comfortingly, tracing patterns and words, almost like a secret language.
"i feel safe with you," you mumble against his chest, but the words are muffled and hard to make out.
"hm?"
you pull back a bit to peer up at him with tear-filled eyes, cheeks pink and puffy, "i feel safe with you," you repeat, voice shaky but much more relaxed, calm.
he smiles softly, peering down at you with that familiar tenderness, "i'm glad," he murmurs, and you swear you catch his eyes trail down to your lips for a brief moment, "i want you to feel safe with me."
"can you kiss me?" you whisper, voice breaking on the last word, not caring that this could make or break the quiet companionship you've formed with him, "please."
his brow furrows again but he doesn't pull away, lips parting a bit in surprise, "sweetheart, i'm not sure that's-"
"please," you repeat, voice raw and desperate, "it's all i think about."
his expression relaxes then, the tenderness returning. with a resigned look you watch as he leans his face down toward you; you close your eyes and allow him to press his lips gently against yours, soft and sweet. he's so gentle, so warm, so safe. your arms wrap tighter around him as you kiss him back, a soft whimper falling from the back of your throat. it's perfect. he's perfect.
when he pulls away he leaves his forehead pressed against yours, and when you open your eyes your heart stutters when you see his face so close, lips wet from your saliva and eyes dark with desire.
"that what you needed?" he murmurs softly, nose brushing against yours.
you nod and kiss him again, humming quietly against him when he pulls you in closer and palms your back firmly, holding you close. you're not sure how it happens but you both end up on the small couch in the corner of his office, him sitting back against the cushions while you seat yourself in his lap, a leg on either side of his thighs. his hands travel inside your shirt, exploring the soft expanse of your back as you whimper again into his mouth and revel in the feeling of being touched by someone so different.
"what else do you need?" he breathes, voice deep and husky as his hands travel from your back to your face, cradling it in his palms, "i'll give it to you, sweetheart, anything you ask. just tell me."
you could say a multitude of things; you could tell him to kiss you again, touch you, fuck you, the list goes on. and you want him to do all of that, but the one thing on your mind is what inevitably slips past your lips.
"i just want you to hold me," you whisper, and you don't care if you sound pathetic, "please."
he looks at you with a great deal of pain in his eyes, an empathetic gaze you've seen numerous times. he thumbs your cheeks, wipes away the tears there and slowly nods.
"okay, babygirl," he murmurs, "i'll hold you."
you sit in his lap for the next hour. it's quiet and peaceful and perfect; he rubs your back while you bury your face into the crook of his neck, breathing him in and letting his presence completely invade your senses. you fall asleep briefly, but when you wake up you're happy to find that you're still in his lap, still being held. he makes absolutely no moves to remove you from him, to pull away or leave the room. he just holds you.
"thank you," you whisper finally; it's time to leave, you know this. your boyfriend will be looking for you soon, wondering where you went and why you didn't come back. you pull your face up from joel's neck and look down at him with tenderness, love.
"any time," he murmurs with a gentle smile, then leans forward a bit to press a tiny kiss to the tip of your nose, "i mean it, sweetheart. any time you're upset, any time you need to be held...you come to me, okay?"
you nod, biting down on your lip to keep the tears at bay, "no one's ever held me like this before," you whisper, "not even my own father."
his brows scrunch together and he touches your arms, squeezing them carefully in his hands, "i'm sorry, babygirl," he breathes, "you don't deserve that," his eyes capture yours in an intimate gaze, "you deserve the world."
the word is there, fighting to be spoken behind your lips. but you don't say it. you don't want to make him uncomfortable, don't want to ruin something that's only just started. but you feel it there, the desire to call him what you've been wanting to call him since the day you met. but that's a conversation for another day.
instead of words, you settle for a kiss. you lean down and touch your mouth to his, feel the gentle scratch of his scruff against your chin as you open a bit wider to allow his tongue to prod inside, just for a moment. he tastes like comfort, feels like safety.
daddy.
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lxmelle · 12 days
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Gojo was once described by Gege as a “man of resignation”.
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It is a facet of enlightenment - in which the concept of “non-attachment” is a big part of (attachment is viewed as the root of suffering).
We can interpret “resignation” in so many ways, as it explains so much about his immense capacity for love / acceptance, but also his tendency to... simply resign himself to an outcome / fate I guess - a form of passivity that can be either considered positive or negative, perhaps depending on outcome.
Going with the flow, neither chasing nor halting anything in particular with his immense might and potential. He swayed things to gently influence an outcome. Followed a designated path trying to rebuild the sorcerer world through being a teacher... which he couldn’t fully commit too either, because he had a role as a special grade who had to keep working.
That’s not to say he didn’t achieve anything - because of course he did. But nothing revolutionary. He said so himself to Geto: he didn’t see a point in it. There were just some things he didn’t think would change - someone else would replace the higher-ups.
And thus. Despite his massive strength, he never did ever manage to go all out. Perhaps this is symbolic of an inherently gentle/accepting nature? But there was indeed a monster inside him too - the one that thrived on the thrill of killing and defeating. It was a beast he seldom let out. It was a beast with a thirst.
I’ve said it before, and I’ll paraphrase: like a sprinter limited to go at 8kmph, like a singer who is only allowed to whisper her song, a painter unable to use any paints for their desired masterpiece - how dreadfully, painfully unfulfilling.
So of course it was FUN to have this final brawl with Sukuna - to give it his very best, especially when he also didn’t feel lonely anymore with a bunch of monsters he can pass the gauntlet (his body and his will) onto in the worst case scenario.
But of course Gojo doesn’t have the ability to predict the future, so how can anyone expect that he make decisions and judgements perfectly or accurately? All he can do is consider based on his own judgement. Alone. As the only other person who help him plug those holes in his judgement, Geto, had left him.
It is up to interpretation whether Geto was left behind first, but this really isn’t a competition or about assigning blame… because where do we even start?
One cannot hold Gojo totally accountable for things that happen around him or how others interpret his actions. He was born different to everyone else. Probably treated as if he had this role to fill where people had an idea of what they wanted or needed him to be, but never gave much thought over what it would feel like for him.
Gojo, Shoko, and those left behind have had to suffer the same resignation. After all: What else are you supposed to do but resign yourself, in the face of a reality where even to things you don’t wish to happen, have to happen? All you can do is what you can... and if you can, you wield it with all your might.
Geto tried it to the best of his ability.
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He wasn’t Gojo, who could do it if he wanted to.
Understanding that Gojo wasn’t, and accepting that he (Geto) shouldn’t change that about him (Gojo), as he was likely more suited to be at the school - essentially following nanami’s words and “leaving it to him” as Gojo was in his element / thrived on it, but Geto couldn’t be complicit in the system that would lead them to watch their own kind die one by one — Geto left to follow his ideals.
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Gojo was referred to as the only one who can take that curse into his own hands. I used to see it as “the only one to kill Geto” after he failed and almost lost his humanity for the sake of power (killing Yuta would go against his principles) but now it also has a new meaning: the only one who can take charge and pursue the ideals to actually change the world.
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The curse is the sh*t that is in the world of sorcery in jjk. Gojo seemed to (imho) now feel the need to catch up and hold the reins this time.
It is the end of Resignation Man Gojo Satoru. The emergence of The Monster Gojo Satoru (who Geto assisted in helping Gojo keep at bay through being the “model of humanity” that Gojo could follow) who was then fully ready to take the stand. Like Geto on that stage.
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Bye higher ups.
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Before, despite his immense strength, he didn’t force his way through. Perhaps this was the outcome of having been forced to be born and live with no choice but to be the six eyes + limitless. You do not actually have freedom.
Unless, you’re willing to become a pariah. To wield these cards that were dealt to you and completely become the extraordinary.
And now, Yuta embraces the same resigned acceptance of becoming a monster. After all... only a few will be able and willing to turn into a Monster.
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Out of love. A Monstrous love indeed.
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Geto had monstrous motherhood in him. I guess this extends to others now too. To cast away humanity because nobody else will. Nobody else can. So they have to wield it. Become it.
Yuta represents both the old and new world... in some way, he is like Gojo and Geto combined... power / strength + sincerity / kindness. Of course, like the yin and yang, each half has a bit of the other in it - so Gojo and Geto had a combination of power and compassion, but they symbolically represent each,
Arguably, had Geto someone else by his side, things may have been different.
All of this mess… ugh.
It didn’t have to come to this, right? Nor did it have to be the extermination of humans, but it could’ve been a collaboration of the special grades (Yuki, Gojo, Geto) all trying to solve the 3 different factors to the problem: humans as the origin of curses (research), the old-fashioned higher ups + clans, and the elimination of the curses. There may be others, but you get my gist.
But alas, this is the jjk world.
Just some thoughts, I’ll end it here before it’s more word vom.
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the-travelling-witch · 7 months
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𝐆𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐁𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝: 𝐋𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍
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Character Choice: Leviathan x Fem! Reader
Stats: nsfw/ minors dni, jealous/ possessive! levi, cream pies, monster/tail fucking, mean dom! levi, levi with two cocks, degradation/ name calling, marking, double penetration, unprotected sex (stay safe everyone!), hint of/ alllusion to exhibitionism towards the end
Profile: It’s not fair! Why do his stupid brothers get to hog your attention all the time? He’ll make sure you’ll pay attention to him and only him. You’re not leaving his room for quite a while; there’s lots of fun stuff Levi wants to try with you. And when you do limp out of his room, his brothers will certainly get the message.
this is a repost because i'm moving my nsfw works onto this blog!!
obey me masterlist || sfw version
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You had been playing video games with Levi for a while now, comfortably sitting in his lap with his chin resting on your head. And so far, everything had been super relaxed. That was until the credits rolled and Levi’s focus started to drift from the screen to you, inhaling the comforting scent of your hair products.
Just for the stench of his brothers to fill his nostrils, clinging to you just as stubbornly as the actual demons. It made him livid, imagining Asmo hanging off your arm, Satan holding you close as he read to you or Belphie using your lap as his personal napping spot. You should be spending time with him! 
Before he knew it, pure jealousy was coursing through his veins and his form shifted. Coral-like horns perched on his head like a crown as a scaled tail wrapped around your ankle, slowly winding upwards. His hands, which had held the controller up until now, gripped your hips tightly as he tried to control his breathing.
You’d felt Levi’s envy often enough through the pact linking you two together. Whether it was losing the bid on a figurine he wanted or seeing someone else with the character he tried to get, the feeling wasn’t new to you. But this time, the sensation was overwhelming, his pact mark on your body searing with his jealousy. Normally, you could console him easily enough but right now you weren’t so sure. 
“Levi? Levi are you alright? What’s wrong?” you questioned, one hand coming up to thread into his purple locks as you tried to shift so you could face him. Only to be stopped by his iron grip. You could, however, get a glimpse of his orange-flashing eyes, pupils merely slits. “Levi, I’m worried-”
“Oh, now you care?” His tone was cold and sent shivers down your spine, rare determination falling from every word. “What’s wrong, you ask? Maybe it’s the fact that you’re always so busy cosying up to all my brothers. Even that scumbag gets more of your attention than I do.”
Levi knew deep inside that wasn’t true. You always spent plenty of time with him. Then, Lucifer’s cologne tickled his nose and he lost all sense of rationality, thoughts only fueled by his sin. When he spoke again, his words were like pure venom dripping from his fangs. “Did you have fun? Letting them get their grimey hands all over you?”
“No, Levi, I-” You interrupted yourself with a sudden gasp as sharp teeth sank into the column of your neck, not deep enough to draw blood but enough to leave a nasty, very visible mark. Still, you couldn’t help but grind yourself back on him, feeling his prominent bulge against your ass. You almost drooled at the inhuman size of him, mind wandering to how good he’d stretch you open on that.
“Enjoying yourself?” He hissed while pressing you down harder, rubbing himself against your clothed pussy. Searching for something to ground yourself with, you reached back and dug your fingers into his hair as you rolled your head back to give Levi more access to your neck. “Look at you, you’re actually getting off to this. You’re so easy, no wonder demons like you so much.”
Much to your embarrassment, you could feel the arousal staining your panties at his harsh words. There was no use denying it, this side of your usually timid Levi was heavily turning you on, so much so that you could feel yourself pulsing against the straining material of his sweats. Somehow, that realisation just made you squirm against him more, searching desperately for any sort of friction.
It came in the form of his tail flicking forcefully against your core, not enough to seriously hurt you but definitely hard enough to mix pain with pleasure. Levi took advantage of your moan to tip your head back and shove his forked tongue down your throat. At the same time, his clawed hands roughly groped your breasts over your RAD dress shirt, certainly leaving red marks for you to find later. Apparently that wasn’t enough for the demon though, carelessly ripping the material apart and making buttons roll over the floor of his room.
Your bra was next. Although he didn’t destroy it, he merely pulled it down enough to where your breasts could spill over the cups, further driving home the point that this wasn’t about you. This was only for him and his pleasure.
As his fingers meanly pulled at your nipples, tweaking the little buds and rolling them between his digits, his tail had stopped prodding at your slit and instead slithered under the waistband of your bottoms. With it pressed against your body like that, it really had no option but to rub over your clit as it reached for your undergarments.
Just when you thought Levi would really have you ruin your clothes, he pushed them off your legs to give his tail free reign to work. As the appendage curled around the seat of your panties to pull them off as well, it grazed your folds and you lightly jerked in your demon’s hold. 
Said demon had gone back to biting and licking at your neck, his eyes following the string of arousal sticking to your underwear with rapt attention. The fact that he could reduce you to this state so easily was definitely an ego boost but he was nowhere near satiated with just this.
“I think it’s time I remind you who you really belong to,” he snarled, voice bitter as he could still smell them on you. “Once I’m done with you, nobody will ever forget it again.”
Without so much as a warning, Levi plunged the end of his tail into your soaked core, earning something between a shriek and a moan from you. The initial clamp down of your walls around his scales drew a shaky groan from him in return, squeezing your tits harder in his palms.
His tail was curling and uncurling inside of you in unreadable patterns as he stretched you out gradually. The texture of his cold scales was something you never grew used to as they scraped against your warm walls, the tip effortlessly hitting spots you never knew you had.
In record time, Levi had you writhing and squirming in his lap and he chose to make it worse by slipping one hand down your front to ruthlessly tap your pulsing clit. The noises you made drove him nearly insane with lust but he willed himself to patience, as far as that was still possible.
“That’s it, you’re gonna cum,” he all but ordered, fingers and tail pressing down on the same spot on opposite sides of your walls. “And your orgasm is gonna be all mine, you got that?”
“Yes, Levi,” you whined, eyes screwed shut and fingers tightening around his wrist and his purple locks.
“Then do it,” he spoke directly against your ear. 
You straightened in his hold as lightning shot up your spine, the thicker part of his tail keeping your legs nicely spread while he flicked his fingers harsher against your clit. 
Then, your bones turned to pudding as you weightlessly leaned back against Levi’s clothed chest, feeling your release leak around his tail. You tried to control your breathing with little success. A hand swept sweat matted hair out of your eyes while a second one ran up and down your side to provide a familiar comfort.
But soon, your world shifted as you fell forward, your fall only cushioned by a hand on your chest before your cheek met one of Levi’s many pillows, which had previously not laid there. Behind you, the demon rose to his knees as well, his thighs colliding with your ass. 
You whined as the movements of his tail started again, much slower than before though. He shushed you almost gently, yet when you pushed yourself up on weak arms to look back at him, one hand firmly pressed your upper back onto the floor again.
“Be good and behave.” Levi’s cold voice made you shiver in the best way possible and this time he could feel the way you clamped down on him at his command. “Seriously, I thought between us I was the perv but seeing you let me use you like this without any resistance makes me question that.”
There was rustling of clothes to be heard and you almost protested the withdrawal of his tail but the pressure of his pre cum leaking cocks against you shut you right up. No matter how often you two got frisky, you wondered every time how they were supposed to fit.
As much as Levi wanted to see you choke on his cock while attempting to wrap your hand around the other, he was far too impatient. He needed to stretch you open now.
Aligning the head of his upper dick, he heaved a sigh before pushing in. Just feeling your heat around the tip made him lightheaded but before he could get carried away, he remembered why you two were in this position in the first place. 
In one single thrust, the demon filled you to the brim, knocking all air from your lungs as you were shoved into the pillow. Despite having two members to work with, taking just one was still quite the challenge. It hurt but at the same time it felt so good.
With his demeanour that night, you thought he’d set a ruthless pace from the start but he surprised you with tempered and measured thrusts, aiming for depth rather than speed. Your shoulders tensed up when you felt his tail return, this time however circling your other hole.
“Levi-“ 
“Don’t tell me you don’t want this, I can feel that messy cunt of yours gripping me even tighter.” And he was right. Just the imagination of Levi using his tail, which was still coated in your previous release, to prepare you for what was inevitably to come had you bounce your hips back on him. “Yeah, that’s what I thought. You’re supposed to be my master, yet you’re acting more like a bitch in heat, already going dumb on my cock.”
Apparently now it was time for your bra to leave the scene completely as Levi fumbled with the clasp for a second before carelessly throwing it somewhere into his room. 
The fact that he was still fully clothed whereas you were completely nude made you feel excitingly exposed, fire burning through your body at the thought of Levi just having your way with you like this.
It should have been embarrassing how your pussy squelched with his cock inside, how fast you were approaching another orgasm, but with Levi leaning more of his weight onto you as he seemed to reach deeper in both your cunt and ass, you were more concerned with trying to sustain your lungs with enough air.
Well, it wasn’t like you had to tell him you were close anyway. The way it got harder to move in and out or the way your legs started trembling gave you away. With his cocks hitting your g-spot and clit on every forward motion as your walls were sandwiched on both sides between him, it was clear you’d reach your peak sooner rather than later.
Your high pitched moans echoed around the room and Levi’s guttoral groans soon joined as he starved off his own release to fuck you through yours. At this point, your vision turned hazy but you couldn’t help but want more. And more you should get.
Through the fog of your mind, you barely registered the moment of emptiness and Levi’s biting words were drowned out by your own heartbeat pulsing in your ears. What you did notice was the sensation of two cocks stuffing you to your limit, both heads throbbing with a desperate need to just stuff you full of his cum.
The view of you on your elbows and knees, back arched and fingers a death grip on his pillow rushed directly to his head and to his dicks. He was the one who had reduced to such a pathetically fucked out state, unable to speak any coherent sentences. Not his brothers.
“Do you just whore yourself out to everyone?” Sharp claws were dancing up your spine, the layer of sweat reflecting the blue light of his room. The thought of his brothers getting just a glimpse of you like this made his earlier rage flare up again.
“N-No,” you whimpered meekly.
“No? Just the demons you know?” His still clothed chest met your back as his hands held your hips in an iron grip, no doubt leaving bruises in their wake. His fangs were grazing your skin again, searching for a new spot to leave his mark on. “If Mammon were here, would you let him fuck this messy cunt of yours, hm? Would you gag on Belphie’s cock like a slut, yeah? Let him push your head down as he pleases?”
You didn’t answer this time, not that he really expected you to. Normally, Levi might have intertwined your fingers or pressed a sweet kiss to your temple. But not on this day. 
“C’mon, you can be louder than that, slut.” Purple coloured nails tangled in your hair and pulled your head up. “Let everyone in this house who’s fucking you this good.”
Nothing he had to tell you twice. You felt so full, every sensitive spot you could think of and all those you didn’t know you had were being abused over and over again. 
What had you screaming and scrambling for purchase was the pain of his fangs piercing the skin of your shoulder as his tail wrapped around your middle, the tip resting dangerously close to your sensitive clit after dragging through the slick mess staining your thighs.
“You’re close again, right?” That was when his tail started circling your pulsing nub and your eyes flew open as the knot in your stomach started pulling you into opposite directions once more. “That’s right, you're just a little toy for me to use, aren’t you? Just an obedient cocksleeve waiting to get stuffed.”
To emphasise his point, your expression was reflected back to you on one of his shiny consoles, eyes fluttering open and shut as your tongue lolled out and drool dripped from your lips, head still pulled back.
“Fuck, you look so good like this,” Levi cursed out of breath, cocks twitching against your walls as the slapping of skin picked up in speed. Letting your head fall forward again, both hands gripped your hips tightly, nails nicking your skin.
“I’m so close, please I can’t—“ You couldn’t decide if you were begging to cum or to rest.
Your demon made the choice for you. He drew quicker circles on your abused clit, pressing his scales down harsher, which had your toes curling and your hips trying to wind away from the assault. 
“Stop squirming!” Pulling your hips back to meet his strokes, you weren’t sure if Levi was trying to make you cum again or if he was just selfishly chasing his own release with all means possible. “I’m gonna fill you up and you’ll be a good human and not waste a drop. Once we’re done, you’ll only smell like me!”
Mindlessly nodding your head, you fell over the edge with a scream of his name, shuddering and jerking as his pace didn’t slow at all. Maybe it was because you were so out of it but you could swear you could feel his cocks swell before his hips stuttered and he painted your walls white with a throaty groan.
There was no chance you could ever keep all of his cum inside, no matter how deep he shot it. You were pretty sure no human could ever cum this much. 
For a few minutes there was nothing but panting to be heard before he finally pulled out, the bite marks on your shoulders pulsing as the adrenaline wore off. Levi stared as his cum leaked out of you and ran down your trembling thighs, collecting the drops with the tip of his tail before pushing them back into you. You moaned weakly at the clench of your overstimulated walls around the appendage but just as you were wondering whether you could handle another round, the chime of your phones echoed through Levi’s room.
Satan @ House of Lamentation (New): Dinner in 5, get down here
Just as you were about to push yourself up on shaky arms, Levi’s hand on your upper back kept your chest on the floor.
“What are you doing? We don’t have time, we need to get cleaned up,” you protested.
Without a word, Levi wrangled your ankles into your panties again and slid them back up your thighs. Snapping the waistband, he gave your clothed cunt a final slap and innerly gloated at the way your combined release was soaking the already ruined fabric.
With widened eyes, you looked back over your shoulder to see if he was serious only to find him staring at you with a fierce look in his eyes, daring you to challenge him.
“I told you, I’ll make sure everyone knows who you belong to.”
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yanfeisty · 14 days
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I wonder how funny it would be seeing Zhongli x Reader x Neuvillette and how their territorial instincts would come out randomly and they would almost fight each other to the death before they stop themselves and they're like wait im sharing my lover with them. I cannot attack them or else lover = sad
Honestly, I don’t really imagine them fighting because they are so well mannered and all, but there is definitely some tensions in there but let’s see that. Content warnings: none.⠀⠀Thanks for the request, hope you’ll enjoy !⠀⠀ ︵ ⠀⠀ ̼
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⠀‣ Zhongli, Neuvillette
These two are from different lands with jobs they are dedicated to, and therefore they can’t travel much, which is convenient because this means they don’t see each other and can fully enjoy your presence alone. However, this also means that you need to travel between nations and leave one of them to see the other. It’s a pity, but they understand, and they also don’t want you to worry since this relationship is already strainful.
You don’t notice it because you’re mortal, but there’s a sort of competition between the two, they can smell the scent of the other on you and despite being well composed, it kind of awake something within them, the need to remove that scent from you and replace it with their. They’ll get more clingier than usual, like asking if they can hold your hand whether it’s in outdoor or indoor, or giving hugs when you’re already close to them and make them last a bit longer than it should.
Sometimes, you’re able to get them in the same room with a bit of forcing with Neuvillette to go outside, and convincing Zhongli to go see him. They’ll keep throwing side-eyes at each other’s while staying still in their chair, and when you try to discuss with them, one won’t take part of the conversation if he sees the other is already in it, unless you ask a question to him directly—yes, it’s very awkward. They think they’re subtle but they really ain’t, anyone walking by can feel the tension, especially you.
“This tea is wonderful!” You exclaimed as the hot drink fills your throat with multiple flavors, going to the tea shop was a good idea that you thought since everyone could enjoy it and it gave you a subject of conversation to talk about. You gave a look to the two persons to your left and right as a hope for a response from them, knowing they always had interesting things to say even when it’s about drink. “I agree, this tea shop uses an old traditional technique, the process demands lots of patience and care but the result is worth it.” You nodded and smiled to Zhongli’s explanation, then you looked at the other direction. “And what about you, Neuvillette?” “Oh. Yes, it is a wonderful taste indeed.” He nodded while looking at his tea. “…”
You don’t expect them to like each other, but at least hope they could act normally without this feeling of distance. Not only that but there are times were they would throw implicit critical comments about each other’s, “You’re going to spend time with the usurpe- I mean, Mr Zhongli?” It gets tiring, this doesn’t feel like a relationship which makes you disappointed, and they can feel it.
They’ll realise how unwise they acted and will try to make efforts for you, even if it takes a long time, trying to restrict their natural instincts. Eventually, they’ll act more casual when the three of you are together, and when they put their differences aside they find common traits and linking they have which makes you think that in another life they would have been really good friends. Say bye to the awkward silence and hi to the long never ending conversations between the two on Liyue water.
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‘𝓣𝐇𝐄 𝓔𝐍𝐃  Please don’t copy/translate and don’t reblog with yand3r3 tags, also if you’re a yand3r3 blog/reblog account, or you’ll be blocked. Besides that, likes/reblogs/comments are appreciated. 
Would Neuvillette even know that Zhongli is an archon TT?
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babyleostuff · 8 months
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Hi! I was wondering if you could do a Seungkwan version of Cheol and Hannie's calling you clingy in front of the boys?
say you love me | boo seungkwan
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genre | angst & fluff
word count | 1.6k
pairing | seungkwan x reader
author's note | this was actually so hard to write, cuz boo is the fluffiest fluff to ever fluff
“It’s your turn Seungkwan.”
After weeks of busy schedules, restless nights and days spent locked up in a studio, your boyfriend and his bandmates got a few days off, getting the time to properly rest before going back to even crazier schedules due to their upcoming comeback. 
You almost squealed when Seungkwan told you that he was going to have a short break, because you couldn’t remember the last time you got to wake up next to him, or even find the time to give him a goodbye kiss before going to work. 
Despite your obvious excitement, your boyfriend on the other hand, didn’t seem as happy as you were.
At first you brushed it off - of course he must've been very stressed and overwhelmed, so his mind must’ve surely been cluttered about thoughts of work, but you figured that this break was going to be the perfect time to spend some quality time, maybe you could even manage to go on a trip somewhere. 
But as you were sitting in his and Jeonghan’s apartment, the boys’ loud laughs echoing through the living room as they played a board game, Seungkwan still looked like something was bothering him. 
“Seungwkan,” Seungcheol repeated, trying to get the younger man's attention. “Sorry. Got a little distracted,” he could bullshit everyone around him, but all of the boys and you knew that he wasn’t just “a little distracted”.
For the past three hours he had been unusually silent, which was the first red flag, because Seungkwan was never silent. 
With a look full of worry, you scooted closer to him, until your thighs were touching. “You sure everything is alright, baby?” You asked quietly, wrapping your hand around his bicep, gently stroking it with your thumb.
You leaned in to place a kiss on his shoulder, when he shifted away from you, reaching for a water bottle. 
Your brows furrowed in confusion, because Seungkwan never dismissed your affection, especially physical, and he was definitely doing it now. 
“Boo, please tell me what’s wrong,” you said in a hushed tone, noticing how his hands were shaking as he was holding the bottle. You covered one of them with your own in hopes that it would bring him some kind of comfort, because you couldn’t stand seeing him so obviously anxious. 
“Could you stop nagging me, and find something else to do?” His voice was much louder than yours, drawing the attention of the rest of the boys to you. “It’s really overwhelming how you’re just clinging to me.” Seungkwan said, without even looking at you. 
The place went silent, as Seungcheol and Jeonghan exchanged worried expressions, not knowing whether they should say something or not. It wasn’t often that Seungkwan would snap like this, especially at you. 
“No need to be so rude Seungkwan,” his full name felt like poison on your tongue. “You could’ve just let me know if I was making you feel uncomfortable,” you said, letting go of his arm. 
Without sparing a second glance, you walked out of the apartment, pulling Seungkwan’s sweater tighter around yourself as you were met with the cold breeze. You didn’t realise when it had started raining, the droplets of water hitting your face one after another, sending a shiver down your spine. 
You’d think this would be the worst situation to be stuck in - walking in the rain without an umbrella and no phone to use, because you stormed out of the place without bringing it with you. There was no way for you to call any of your friends, and you did not intend to go back to Seungkwan after he treated you like that. 
But the way he snapped at you was so much worse for you. It didn’t help that he had never been so mean to you before, you knew that his teasing and “bullying” were just jokes. 
This certainly wasn’t one. 
“Fuck,” you muttered, as a passing car totally drenched you in water from the puddle on the street. You tried to pull the material of his sweater even closer to your body, but there was no use in that. You were a shaking mess, and if you didn’t change into something dry, you’d surely end up sick. 
Cursing under your breath, you sat at a wet bench - it’s not like you could get any wetter. You closed your eyes for a second, before looking up at the sky, that was just as grey and sad as you were. 
“Baby, what are you doing? You’re going to be sick,” all of a sudden a familiar voice pulled you out of your miserable thoughts. Turning your head towards the source of it, you noticed Seungkwan, who was just as drenched as you, his hair sticking to his forehead and the shirt he was wearing totally soaked by the rain. 
It broke you, seeing his slumped shoulders and tired eyes, probably because of the numerous sleepless nights and days full of hard work, and you had to force yourself not to rush towards him and tell him that everything would be alright. 
Instead you dropped your head, looking away toward the busy street, forcing yourself not to let the tears fall, even though they would most likely be covered by the rain hitting your face. 
“I’m really sorry,” he said, cautiously stepping towards you, almost as if he was scared that you’d run away if he came any closer. “I know that there is no excuse for my behaviour,” his voice was shaky, just as his hands were before, and you knew that if you’d look at him, you’d burst into tears.
So you turned your head even more away from him, squeezing your eyes shut. 
“I should have never snapped at you like that, and I’m really sorry,” you knew that what he was saying was true, you could hear it, but it didn’t mean it made you feel any better. “You really hurt me Seungkwan,” your voice was merely a whisper, drowning in the loud noises of the cars and the rain. 
“I know. And I hate myself so much for treating you like that,” you could hear he was getting closer, and at that point the only thing you wanted to fall into his arms and forget that any of this had ever happened. 
“I know that no matter what I say it won’t change what I did, and I don’t need you to forgive me,” you couldn’t stop the tears from falling onto your cheeks. You were so torn between forgiving him immediately, and screaming at him.
“But I just want you to know how fucking sorry I am, you didn’t deserve any of that. You always stick by my side no matter how hard it gets, and I took that for granted and pushed you away. I should have just talked to you, maybe try to explain how I’m feeling, but instead I treated you in the worst way possible,” even though you weren’t looking at him, you knew he was crying as well. “I pushed away the most important person in my life.” 
Yes, maybe you were weak, maybe you were wrong for feeling bad for him, but love makes you do stupid things. You knew you should’ve been harder on him for snapping at you like that, for calling you clingy for god’s sake, but you couldn’t sit like that anymore. 
“Please just tell me the next time you feel overwhelmed like that, and need some time alone,” you spoke up, glancing at him for the first time since he came. “I understand how burdened you are, and that you worry about a lot of stuff, but I don’t think I’ll be able t-.” 
“No, please I promise I’ll never do something like that ever again,” he pleaded, kneeling in front of you, and taking your hands in his. “You can’t know that Seungkwan. But I want you to talk to me,” you squeezed his cold hands. “Just tell me when you need some time for yourself, I promise I understand that sometimes you just need to be alone.”
“I know, baby, and I was so stupid for not doing that immediately,” he lowered his head, placing it on your knees, as his body shook with his sobs. You snaked your hand around the back of his head, gently pulling at the strands of his wet hair. “You’re not stupid Boo, and don’t hate yourself for doing that. I may not forgive you right now, but don’t think about yourself like that, ever.” 
He slowly lifted his head, his blood shot eyes looking straight into yours. You smiled at him, and cupped his cheek, stroking it with your thumb. 
“Please, tell me that you still love me.” 
Your heart broke, the way he sounded so concerned, made you want to wrap him in all of the blankets you had at home, and kiss him all night long. It hurt you so much that he’d think you didn’t love him anymore. 
“Of course I still love you, baby. I guess thighs like that happen in relationships, and I would never stop loving you because of that. I’m happy that you see what you did wrong, and I know that you’ll know better now.” 
“I never meant what I said. You could never be clingy.” he said, nuzzling his head further into your hand. “I know. Now let’s go, or we’ll get sick,” you said, standing up, and pulling him with you. 
“Mingyu lost by the way,” Seungkwan smirked, pulling you closer to his body. 
“I knew it.”
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