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ozzgin · 4 months

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Yandere! Yokai Harem x Reader (II)

The two yokai men reach an agreement and you begin your journey together, searching for clues regarding the mysterious case of your incomplete reincarnation. You learn about the third of the Legendary Yokai, a gargantuan monster worshipped in times of war.

[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Character Guide]

The next swish of the mysterious man's sword is parred by Kiritsubo, who managed to make his way to you in time.

"Wait! It's not entirely him, Murasaki, I can explain!" He shouts frantically.

"So you let him live. This is why you've never been good for anything." The dark haired man snarls in a low voice, disgust seeping through his sharp teeth.

It becomes obvious rather quickly that he has the advantage in terms of battle experience. You can only stare in fear, stuffing your wound with your jacket sleeve. What else can you do? You're bleeding profusely and if a demon of Kiritsubo's stature cannot compete, you'd be even less helpful.

"Listen to him, man, I genuinely don't know anything about your master!" You beg as your limbs are flooded with a prickling sensation. They're slowly going numb. "Please. I just want to go home."

Damn it. You have no idea whether the bleeding will stop anytime soon. Is this how you die? You won't even get a proper burial. Even worse, your family will live on thinking you vanished without a trace, unaware you've been stabbed to death by a crazy jackass in feudal Japan. You wish you could make them stop.

You squeeze your eyes tightly, trying to think of a way to escape, when you hear both men groan in pain. You look ahead to see them on the ground, clinging tightly to their chests, faces twisted in a grimace. Huh? They couldn't have killed each other in the few seconds they were out of your view. What is going on?

After a few agonizing moments, the yokai seem to calm down. Kiritsubo is gasping for air, clumsily pulling himself back up. Murasaki remains on the grass, forcing himself to appear collected despite the cold sweat coating his forehead.

"That's...what...I...meant..." The silver haired demon groans between hitched breaths. "Whew. You see it now, don't you? She doesn't emanate enough power to pull this off. It's coming from somewhere else."

Murasaki clicks his tongue in visible annoyance.

"So then, what do you suggest?"

"I don't know. But something is stopping you from killing her and there's a chance she's connected to the source."

"What are you guys whispering about?" You inquire, crawling closer towards the horned men. "And why did you suddenly collapse? You scared the hell out of me!"

"You didn't feel anything?" Kiritsubo questions you with raised eyebrows.

"Besides the, I don't know, stab wound? No, thankfully." You respond sarcastically.

Without a word, Murasaki stands up and approaches you. He crouches down to your level and nonchalantly slaps your hand away from your shoulder.

"Hey!"

"Have you ever tended to a wound in your life? You're shit at it." He uses his sword to cut off your sleeve and folds it over your gash with calculated movements. You hiss at the pain and glare at him. "Bite down on a stick if you can't handle it. Better than being dead."

The white haired yokai flashes you an awkward but reassuring smile.

"He might be an ass about it, but he knows what he's doing."

"Why are you helping me, anyways?" you point out, somewhat wary. "You literally tried to kill me a moment ago."

"I changed my mind. You'll help us find the damned bastard or whatever it is he's using to control us."

"What, the priest? Hell no, I'm going back to my world. I've had enough action for the rest of my life."

Murasaki finishes bandaging you and gives you one final press, almost as if messing with you, and you wince. He stands up and slides his sword back in its sheath.

"If you focus a little, you will find there was no question or request in my words. I'm not negotiating with a weakling like you."

Kiritsubo squats down before you and claps his hand together, pleadingly.

"Please think about it, (Y/N). I know you don't owe us anything, but there's a chance we could finally break the seal and be free. If you'd consider helping us. You can walk away, but that won't change the fact you're part of Abe no Nakamaro. He will want his powers back at some point, and we can protect you when the time comes."

You cross your arms and frown thoughtfully, pondering the options. He did save you twice already. So in a way, you're indebted to him. And if he's right, and you will have to deal with more crazy encounters in the future, it's probably better to have two powerful demons by your side.

"Alright, alright. I'll help you." You exclaim with a confident nod.

Kiritsubo grins, satisfied, and Murasaki huffs and looks away. There's a prolonged silence as you wait for them to continue with further instructions, but the men remain quiet.

"So...what now?" you eventually speak up.

"Oh. I thought you knew where to go next." the silver haired man retorts, confused.

"Idiot. She's not a compass." Murasaki scolds him. "Can you stand?" He adds, turning to you. "There's a shrine a few kilometers away that belonged to him. If we leave now, we should make it before sunset. Maybe we can find something there."

You try to prop yourself up, but Kiritsubo promptly scoops you with his sinewy arm and throws you on his back again.

"I'll carry you. Just hold on."

A faint blush dusts your cheeks, but you don't have the energy to argue it. You clutch onto his broad shoulders and nod.

The walk is uneventful and both yokai seem to be distracted. The gentle swaying is causing you to be more comfortable than you'd like to admit and your eyelids become heavy with exhaustion. Before you know it, your head drops against the toned back and you fall asleep.

By the time you open your eyes again, you've already reached your destination. You yawn and stretch, lazily scanning the surroundings. A heavy shadow looms over you and you glance up. Still groggy from your nap, you scream before you can fully process the object towering above.

It's a statue. A colossal statue of some sort of monster. A demon with thick, wide bull horns sprawling out imposingly, almost eclipsing the ridiculously muscular build. The creature has four arms, flexed in a threatening manner, with one hand gripping a heavy spear and the other a skull. The crimson light of the sunset creeps through the windows and reflects against the chiseled clay, giving the statue a devilish glow. You feel insignificant.

"That's Suma."

"W-what?" your head tilts to Kiritsubo.

"He's one of us. You might meet him soon, if he's been alerted of your presence. This is a shrine built for him, to bring good fortune during times of war."

You cannot help but gawk at the structure.

"Is it, uh, life sized?"

"Heh, almost. He's a little taller than this." He chuckles, slightly nostalgic.

You swallow dryly. Just a moment ago you thought Kiritsubo was unusually big.

"I'd rather not meet him, to be honest." You shiver at the idea.

"Don't worry about it. Now that Murasaki has joined us, you're pretty much safe from anything. He's the strongest of us." The yokai remarks with a sad smile.

"Really?"

You peek at the dark haired man, currently flipping through dusty manuscripts, and briefly observe him. Compared to Kiritsubo, he's quite slender, with noble, elegant features. And he'd be able to defeat this enormous beast? Then again, the glimpse you've caught of his swordsmanship is enough of a convincing argument.

What a bizarre gathering of creatures beyond your understanding.

You remember to look away when Murasaki grunts and throws the remaining scroll of paper. His lips form a thin line as he rakes his mind for the next step.

"Nothing here. But I'm rather certain he has to be at one of his hideouts. We'll check each and one of them if we have to."

"Wait, are you saying he's still alive? We saw his body before Sekiya and Sakaki took him for the embalming and burial."

Murasaki scoffs at his partner's gullible nature.

"And you believed it? That parasite spent his entire life searching for ways to prolong his reign. He's probably hiding somewhere, waiting for his renewed part of the soul to return to him."

He rests against the wall and points a clawed finger at you.

"This must've been his solution. Releasing his remaining energy until it found a proper vessel to grow stronger, and patiently awaiting the body swap. Then we go back to being whipped dogs fulfilling his whims."

It's your turn to be outraged, twisting your mouth downwards.

"No way, I'll pound that old man into sand!" You bark and throw a jab against the air, emphasizing your threat. "As if I'd just hand myself over."

"I'm not sure if it'll be that easy, (Y/N)..." Kiritsubo glances at you with a hurt expression. "He's a terrifying, vengeful bastard."

"Not if we find him first and take him out." Murasaki counters with a glint of determination in his eyes. "Humans need to rest, don't they? We'll spend the night here and tomorrow we head out. Kiritsubo, find me a map so we can keep track of the locations. I'll bring the wood for a fire."

And with this, he marches out. Kiritsubo scurries to his duty and you quietly follow his movements. He seems to be used to executing Murasaki's orders. You hadn't considered their group dynamic much, but it appears to have some rather complex hierarchies involved. You almost wish you could witness all of them together, wondering how they'd interact with each other.

Who knows? If you stick around, it could happen eventually. Murasaki was surprisingly easy to convince, so the other yokai might as well agree to keep you alive until you find their source of misfortune. Heh. Almost like a harem, or something. You snicker to yourself.

Which reminds you...

The fire has been lit and Murasaki mumbles something about guarding the perimeter. This time you hurry outside after him. You reach out to the dark haired man and pull on his kimono sleeve.

He turns to you, mildly irked.

"What?"

"Teach me how to use a sword." You state with the assertiveness of an order.

"Why? I can assure you I'm more than enough. I've never been defeated." He stares at you, incredulous.

"I don't want to rely on you all the time. You're already this close to being unbearable", you explain, pinching your fingers together. "Besides, if I'm going to be stuck among beasts, I'd very much prefer being the one doing the cool stuff."

And with that, you pretend to slice through an invisible enemy, whistling the sound of your sword cutting through the air. You furrow your eyebrows, imitating the engrossed expression of a seasoned samurai in the middle of a battleground. Murasaki quickly lifts a hand to his mouth - did he chuckle just now? - and responds, the faintest amusement in his voice:

"As you wish. But I'm warning you now, I won't hold back."

"I've been injured twice in less than 24 hours, I'm sturdy enough." You answer, patting your chest proudly.

Next time one of the Legendary Yokai comes for you, you won't be as vulnerable. That's for sure.

#female reader #yandere #yandere x you #yandere x reader #yandere x darling #monster x reader #yandere yokai #yokai x reader #yandere demon #yandere monster #yandere scenarios #yandere imagines #male yandere x reader #yandere original character #yandere oc #original character #original work #yokai oc

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silvergreenseraphim · 5 months

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Angeal and Sephiroth (And Genesis?)—Dissidia Opera Omnia—Part Three

I AM ALIVE!!

Of course, a bunch of crazy real life things had to happen right as I was trying to translate this chapter, but I am back now and it’s time to get to work! So sorry for the wait, but I thank you all for your patience!

Also, Dissidia being literally cancelled while I was away was a very odd and unfortunately timed occurrence. I was upset to see the news, but I suppose that was a strong impetus to keep translating since we may never get official English translations now. Whew!

Well, let’s dive in!

—

So, after the last encounter with Sephiroth where Angeal had to accept that Sephiroth’s will was also influencing his choice to destroy the world, part of our team is gathered around Zack, resting and talking.

They express concern for Angeal, wondering if he is okay or if he is in shock after meeting his best friend who has changed so much. Tifa is prompted to then ask Zack what kind of person Sephiroth had been before the insanity.

Zack says,

“I didn’t really know him from the start. Only since I began working with Angeal, but I heard that they (Sephiroth and Angeal) were really close, as well as with their other best friend (Genesis). That one (Genesis) would play around with him (Sephiroth), and when things crossed a line, Angeal scolded them both. Sephiroth explained to me that Angeal gave him endless lectures about discipline, dreams, honor/hope, etc….”

A reference to this scene in Crisis Core:

This is so cute, but of course everyone else is bewildered! One of them says something like, “Wait, we are still talking about Sephiroth, right??” and Zack just laughs saying, “I don’t blame you for thinking that/wondering that.”

But Zack reassures them about how Seph used to be, saying,

“He was strong, he took good care of/helped people, and he cared about his juniors/younger colleagues. That was the Sephiroth I knew once.”

Cloud seems in awe over this. Zack goes onto explain,

“Then something went wrong with Genesis and Angeal’s bodies (reference to degradation), and they didn’t tell Sephiroth. That’s why everything got so tense. They probably didn’t want to involve him in all that, but I think Sephiroth felt alone/was lonely. I was also left behind by Angeal, so I shared the feeling.”

Cloud teases Zack, saying basically “Oh, so that’s why you acted like that when you met Angeal again,” and Zack laughs in embarrassment. Krile comments that Zack’s best quality is being always honest to himself, and Zack is grateful for the kindness. Then he goes back to talking about Sephiroth, saying,

“So back to Sephiroth. Later when Angeal and the other friend (Genesis) were gone, something went wrong with Sephiroth this time. It seemed like he uncovered the secrets about his birth/creation, but he didn’t tell me much about that. But what occurred made it clear to me….that wasn’t Sephiroth, I am certain. It’s why I want to help Angeal. I want to bring Sephiroth back to who he was.”

There is a sad moment here where the others understand Zack’s wishes, but Tifa and Cloud admit that they aren’t sure if they could ever forgive Sephiroth for destroying their village and killing their relatives even if he were to return to sanity. Cloud in particular admits that he feels anger and then sorrow, a pain in his chest, when he thinks of Sephiroth. Cloud is kind to Zack, saying that he owes him so much, but on this subject their wishes diverge. He says he is sorry for that, but Zack understands saying,

“No, it’s okay. I am sorry too, Cloud.”

They all accept the fact and agree that everyone has a different position, moving on. However, Cloud does briefly stop to wonder if it is indeed possible to bring Sephiroth back to his old self.

We cut away from this scene and go to Angeal, who is talking with some of the elder Final Fantasy characters. They ask him if he is calm now, wondering,

“So, he (the current Sephiroth) is indeed not your good friend?”

This statement sounds like a casual, “So, you aren’t friends anymore” type of observation, but it is actually in reference to the Jenova-Sephiroth dilemma. They are basically asking Angeal if the real Sephiroth is truly gone. Angeal confirms in a sense, saying that,

“That’s why I was so disturbed. It wasn’t just strictly a matter of “he has changed.”

The others remind Angeal that if Sephiroth is no longer human, then he doesn’t have to feel so weighed down by the whole thing, but Angeal says,

“No, even if that is true, even if he is physically Jenova, I can sense his will still inside.

The character Aaron says, “Then there is a strong chance Sephiroth wills himself into this state (being one with Jenova).”

Angeals says he knows and that Sephiroth does indeed not seem to be human anymore. He then confirms,

“This is why I should be the one to finish this…for the sake of my other friend that I failed to save (Genesis).”

Aw 🥲

There is a sequence here that follows where the elders talk to Angeal about his serious and responsible reputation, and how he trains his juniors like Zack. They offer Angeal some pleasant advice, saying not to worry so much about Zack anymore because the latter has truly grown. Angeal agrees, noting how much Zack matured and how he passed down his own little legacy to Cloud, who carries the buster sword. The elders encourage Angeal to realize that his strong and powerful words likely helped influence this and enliven others. They note Angeal’s persistent personality as well, but Angeal sadly says,

“Tifa told me that as well, but it wasn’t enough to get through to my friends (Gen and Seph). I was just too confident that we all understood each other. I should have been there for them more…”

Basch, one of the elders, encourages Angeal further, saying in regards to the situation with Sephiroth,

“Even though you are friends, don’t let this be such a burden to you. There were changes in his heart that you simply could not foresee, despite your regret.”

Furthermore he says, “Just because you two were close did not make it your duty (to fix everything). After all, a friend’s presence alone can be strengthening for another even when far away. But if you don’t want to regret, why don’t you try to come across him again now that you are both reunited here.”

Angeal, throughout this little pep talk, still feels badly and hangs his head, but he is surprised to hear the bit about a friend’s presence offering strength, and perks up when the others suggest he try to at least be there for Sephiroth this time around. He agrees, saying,

“You’re right. I will do what I could not do back then…but…”

Angeal pauses to speak one lament amidst his decision.

“…in this world…my other friend (Genesis) isn’t here….and I know he would have wanted to start over/have a second chance with Sephiroth as well…”

—

Small note section before we move to the final battle:

There is so much to unpack in these two scenes because of all the dialogue and all the things finally said about the issues we have been wondering about as fans.

For one, now we know how it would be if the idea of Sephiroth’s redemption were to be discussed among the Crisis Core characters like Zack and Angeal, and the OG characters like Cloud and Tifa.

Zack and Angeal fully want to bring Sephiroth back because he was their friend that they loved, but the perspective of Cloud and Tifa is completely different and understandably so. They never knew Sephiroth as a friend, but instead the great SOLDIER that simply snapped and ruined their lives.

However, they are kind and understanding towards Zack, empathizing with his wishes, as well as with Angeal. It was Tifa who encouraged Angeal earlier, saying that his heroic speeches about dreams and honor had helped her, and that maybe he could reach Sephiroth’s noble, good side with such appeals.

But at the same time, Tifa and Cloud do admit that Sephiroth has wounded them too deeply, and even if he were to come back to his old self, they are not sure if they would ever be able to forgive him for what he did.

Zack is very peaceful about this disagreement, knowing that Cloud in particular means to deal with Sephiroth and not let him go freely. He knows why and accepts it. It’s ultimately very tragic and heart-rending, but we understand why their viewpoints are so different.

As for the scene with Angeal and the elders, it was very endearing to see Angeal being the one getting a pep talk this time. He also speaks very politely and respectfully in Japanese, in contrast to his usual stern tone with Zack. We are reminded that Angeal himself is still just a young man, even though he comes off like a serious, older mentor. He is just as lost and confused as his friends and Zack.

He is very much still beating himself up over not having been there for Sephiroth and not having been able to save Genesis. What was said to him about “It was not your duty” initially caused him to protest and feel some kind of shock. He may have heard that the way anyone else struggling with regret would have. He may have thought, “No, it was my duty.”

In truth, what happened to his friends was not Angeal’s fault. He also quite literally died and couldn’t be there for everything, Yes, perhaps he is right in saying that assuming they all understood each other perfectly was a mistake, but the elders are also right—there were issues that he never could have foreseen. Angeal didn’t know how far Genesis would fall or how broken Sephiroth’s already-damaged psyche was without his friends.

Yet the one thing Angeal surely believes he could have done more was simply be by his friends’ sides when they were going down, which is fair and honorable. I think this is a reasonable conclusion, and so we now see Angeal’s resolve come into full view.

Even if Sephiroth cannot be brought back, Angeal intends to be there for him, to make up for his past mistakes, to make up for Genesis, and to find peace. He also knows and admits that Genesis would have wanted to do the same with Sephiroth if he were present.

The plot of this chapter became clear to me here.

This DOO story is about Angeal’s personal redemption within himself, and perhaps a bit of Genesis’ own as well. It is about closure with the Firsts’ trio, even if it doesn’t lead to Sephiroth’s own redemption. It is still about them 🥲

—

The final battle begins.

There are a few interludes with the Tsviets, Vincent, and Weiss that establish their inclusion in the final battle, and the plan to restore everyone’s memories within the world. The other FF characters also discuss a few things about Seymour’s loyalty, and the team comes up with a final plan to take down Sephiroth for good.

This leads to Sephiroth himself, who is once again worried about the memories Angeal has brought back and how that might interfere with Sephiroth’s anchor to Cloud. He needs Angeal gone in order to not be shaken and take over the world.

Right then, the others run up. Cloud calls Sephiroth’s name and Angeal says,

“I’ve come to stop you!”

Sephiroth announces that they are too late, and that he is ready to take control. The others claim they are stronger, but Sephiroth has the upper hand, of course. He uses a fake Tifa to trick Barret into giving up the power crystals that Sephiroth needs. When this succeeds, Sephiroth summons the great materia called Crystal that apparently holds the world together. He attempts to shatter it and the world starts to crumble. Aerith rushes in front of Crystal to defend it.

Barret and Cloud are struck with horrible memories and premonitions, seemingly about Aerith’s death when this happens. They call for her to get away, but are unable to stand with the weight of memory crashing down on them.

There is a moment of panic as Sephiroth gets ready to charge Aerith, but then Angeal and Weiss actually sweep in to block his path in the nick of time.

And so, the Crisis Core tribute battle formulates, a memorial to the spar that once occurred between three friends. It even plays the music from the CC scene.

Vincent and the Tsviets are shocked to see Weiss, who did not seem to be interested in the final battle before, but something seems to have possessed Weiss. He begins quoting Loveless once again. He says,

“Hm. “My friend, the fates are cruel. There are no dreams, no honor remains. The arrow has left the bow of the goddess.” So, is that how you became a monster, Sephiroth, the “hero”?”

This is a strange moment of questioning from Weiss because it seems confusing with the English translation of Loveless, but he is essentially asking if Sephiroth lost his pride and honor due to a cruel cause or turn of fate. Angeal walks up and fondly reminisces, saying,

“Ah, Loveless…how nostalgic. Genesis quoted that tale until it wore me down.”

Sephiroth is oddly quiet.

Then, funnily enough, Weiss’s intentions are revealed to be about taking Sephiroth’s place. Weiss doesn’t care about what happens in the world, but believes he should be the one to reign over it instead of Sephiroth, making an amusing callback to Genesis wanting Sephiroth’s role as the hero. Angeal laughs and responds to this with,

“Oh pfftt, you two (Weiss and Genesis) are exactly alike in your competitive nature then. Do as you will.”

Essentially, Angeal accepts Weiss to fill the empty space left by Genesis in this particular world, calling back to Angeal’s earlier lament.

Weiss and Angeal prepare for the fight, but Cloud and Zack protest, telling Angeal that he doesn’t need to do this, and that they can help now that they are back to normal. But Angeal only says,

“I know you guys are reliable/strong, but I need to do this.”

Cloud understands and says,

“I see….you want to talk to him (Sephiroth) like a person…to the real Sephiroth buried behind Jenova.”

This seems to be a callback to Cloud and Angeal’s earlier discussion where Angeal told Cloud about how he treated Sephiroth like a human. Even now, Angeal wants to speak to his friend as though he were person, not a monster blended with Jenova. Angeal also jokingly adds,

“At the very least, let me show off a little bit as your senior soldier!”

The fight begins with Angeal saying to Sephiroth that he will speak to him in this way even if the latter tries to stop him. Sephiroth only dismisses this with his same, “There is nothing to talk about in this world. It will soon become an empty vessel” statement. Angeal teases a bit with,

“Come on, don’t hold back! Test your skill with us like you did that day…”

Sephiroth only says he doesn’t remember.

Their fight is familiar and striking, full of quick and clever movement. The others are thrilled watching, with Zack even recognizing some of the moves Sephiroth taught him back in the day.

The nostalgia hits Angeal in the midst of the spar and he calls out,

“Ah, I’ve missed you, Sephiroth!”

They continue, with Sephiroth still aiming for Aerith, but being pushed back by Weiss and Angeal. Angeal further recalls the memory, saying,

“Remember, we used to do this in the old training room at headquarters, playing around in there when the 2nds weren’t looking!”

Sephiroth can still only say he doesn’t remember. Angeal persists with,

“Alright then what about dumbapples? And your friend that was so eager to share one with you that he never gave up his research on them?”

Sephiroth becomes agitated at this and says,

“I told you, I don’t know/remember!”

Weiss laughs and says, “Well, you’re a sorry excuse for a Sephiroth!”

But Sephiroth only says he doesn’t need these memories, and that he erased them. Weiss says,

“Then let me remind you what our brother (Genesis) wanted. My friend, your desire is the bringer of life, the gift of the goddess!”

At this, Sephiroth finally snaps in anger and says,

“Shut up…! All I need is my pure will!”

With this, Sephiroth exerts an extreme amount of power and proceeds to attack the crystal with his raw strength and will, causing everything to tremble. The others begin to panic. Sephiroth viciously says,

“There is my response! My gift to you!”

So yeah, the spar was fun until Weiss and Angeal brought back that memory of Genesis. Unfortunately, it seemingly angered Sephiroth a little too much, and from this point on, things seem hopeless. Sephiroth’s will is too strong, and in the midst of the chaos, Seymour arrives at last, taking Sephiroth’s side and betraying the others.

They begin to destroy Crystal together, and this is when a certain scene occurs that I have translated here:

A very important moment with Vincent, who tries to intervene by telling Sephiroth that Jenova is not his mother, and that his real mother cried for him. Sephiroth, sadly, does not believe Vincent.

Sephiroth grows in his power, drunken on the feeling, and Cloud, Zack, and Angeal stand at the front, ready to take him on, Yes, even Angeal has found his resolve and admits that while things look hopeless, they have to face it. Cloud summons everyone, rallying them all to fight together.

That’s when Sephiroth ascends and takes on his Safer form. Upon seeing this, Zack grows angry and says,

“If this really is Jenova, don’t hold back. How dare she mask as Sephiroth!”

But Safer Sephiroth tells them that he has gathered all the energy of the world to himself, and that they have lost because they did not have the power and strength that comes with pure hatred of the world. Angeal says,

“So, that’s your will. To destroy the world with Jenova’s power. I suppose that’s why I still can’t turn away from you or my past mistakes…because I’m your best friend.”

Angeal is at full acceptance here, understanding that he can’t let Sephiroth do this because it’s his responsibility as Sephiroth’s best friend. It’s a very loving way to say,

“I have to put you down because it’s what’s best for you in this situation.”

So, the battle ends with Seymour and Safer Sephiroth defeated. There is a moment of uncertainty as the world hangs on the edge of collapse, but the team, mainly Angeal, are able to bring Seymour back to his senses in the aftermath. Seymour falls to the earth in regret, much to Sephiroth’s disgust, who would never have let go of his hatred so easily.

Sephiroth then vanishes, summoning Cloud to the final confrontation. Cloud rushes through a portal, into the void where Sephiroth is waiting. The fight is a direct callback to the OG scene.

Cloud beats Sephiroth at once like he did in the original game, everything ending with Sephiroth’s voice echoing through the void, promising that he will return one day with his mother as long as Cloud remembers him. Cloud reassures Sephiroth that he will fight him again and again if it means protecting the world.

When Cloud returns, Zack is overjoyed and Angeal solemnly thanks him for putting Sephiroth to rest. There is a brief intermission where the other FF characters work to bring the shattered world back into balance, but overall, the fight is over and everything is fine again.

Angeal looks to the sky, and is unable to keep from lamenting Sephiroth’s loss, saying that,

“I lost my best friend twice now…I must admit I am filled with regret, pathetic as that may seem…”

But Zack encourages Angeal, reminding him that he was there for Sephiroth this time, and Sephiroth even responded in small ways. Zack also is grateful that Angeal was by his side in battle, saying that he wouldn’t have been able to face everything alone. Angeal warmly says that Zack could have easily stood strong with the way he held onto his pride and honor. There is kind reconciliation here, and with the other characters as well. Small scenes of forgiveness and new promises made.

It was sad, and everybody was hoping that Seph could be brought back, but in the end it was more about Angeal finding peace with the loss of his friend and giving himself a second chance to be there with him until the bitter end. He full-filled this wish, whether Sephiroth knew it or not. For that, I am grateful to Dissidia. They gave Angeal the closure he longed for and that he never would have been able to gain in any other game because of his death. Now I can only hope similar opportunities are granted to the others.

Final Notes:

Thank you so much again for everyone’s patience with this! I can’t believe DOO actually ended as I was in the middle of translating, and all for the sake of Rebirth too! But it had a good run and this bit of closure we got with the CC and OG characters was a pretty decent way to end it. I would have loved to see Genesis involved, but I suspect they knew DOO was ending too soon and so they found a way to at least include his precense before actually adding him to the game.

I also have to wonder if this version of the OG’s story was so Angeal-focused because the Remake will include Genesis and how he will deal with the final battle against Sephiroth. Who can say?

Either way, it was sad and beautiful and it gave us Crisis Core fans a lot of satisfaction and understanding for these characters we loved but felt were a bit deprived by Crisis Core’s writing. It was lovely to have Angeal and Zack reaffirm over and over that the Firsts’ trio were such close friends that were ultimately torn apart by tragedy. They all loved each other dearly, and Sephiroth’s loss to darkness was a massive heartbreak for them. For Zack as well.

I found so many scenes interesting, but the spar tribute was my favorite. Originally, I thought it was Angeal’s attempt to bring Sephiroth back to himself, but I then realized it was Angeal having some fun with his old friend before the real battle began and it was time to end everything. It was like Angeal’s goodbye to Sephiroth ;-;

There are some scenes I may have to edit or retranslate again if anyone finds any mistakes, but hopefully most of it came out okay, and a big thanks to @ansfair on Twitter (please check out their translation as well!) for the extra help with certain scenes, as well as my Japanese-speaking friend! I want to eventually translate a bit more from Dissidia and the earlier scenes from when Angeal first showed up, but for now, I hope this is fun for you all to read!

Much love everyone! ❤️

#my translations #dissidia opera omnia #angeal hewley #sephiroth #zack fair #genesis rhapsodos #weiss the immaculate #cloud strife #tifa lockhart #ff7 og #ff7 #final fantasy 7 #crisis core #ffvii #japanese translations

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strangersteddierthings · 1 year

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Bad News First, Eddie

Part One 🦇 Part Two🦇Part Three🦇FInal Part

Whew! I don’t think I’ve written this much in such a short amount of time ever in my life. The boys deserve a soft ending, I think. Enjoy!

It goes like this. While Eddie's been lost in his own mind, his body was living. Sort of.

Top secret government assisted living, kinda living. For a secret government hospital one would think the place would be fancier or something but it's just a regular looking hospital.

Eddie's in therapy, both for his body and mind.

He learns that the voice he heard when Eleven helped pull him from the depths of his mind was Mike Wheeler of all people, and he sounds different because he's nineteen and in college. Mike mocks him on graduating before Eddie. He regrets it when Eddie gets him into a headlock.

He gets to meet Eleven, outside of his mind. And he starts calling her El. Part of him can't stop thinking about Eleven as the entity he thought was going to lead him to the great beyond.

She is just a person. Sorta.

Dustin had told him there was a girl with superpowers and Eddie is glad she's real. Not that he thought Dustin would lie about this (actually, he might have thought Dustin was lying just to give him some weird version of a pep talk. Everything said before going through Watergate was suspect if he's honest).

When he's finally well enough to be able to leave, Doctor Owens tells him their plan.

They're gonna convince Wayne to fly to Tennessee. Eddie, El, and Mike Wheeler are gonna be flown there, too. There's a place for them to stay, to meet up with his uncle in private.

They'll stay there a month. Doctor Owens knows a doctor who can do Eddie's final evaluations before he can really go home.

That's the real kicker.

Hawkins fucking sucks. Small town, narrow views, non-conformity gets you called a Freak in the same way his Dad used to call him a fag. Like he said, fucking sucks.

But it's also the sanctuary he escaped to when he was eleven years old. It's the place where his uncle built a home for him.

So, back to Hawkins first. He can always go somewhere else later. Maybe a coastal city. See the ocean.

Eddie hasn't been afraid of a reaction from his uncle since that day in the hospital parking lot after he caught Eddie making out with another guy. He's got that same fear inside now, though, knowing that when El opens that door, he'll see the family he feels like he abandoned. It's not fair to himself to think that, his therapist would say, but he's allowed to have crazy thoughts right now. He's come back from being (not)dead and gets to see Wayne again for the first time. Knowing his feelings are justified doesn't make them fade, though, so he's not surprised his voice shakes when the door finally opens. “Hey Uncle Wayne.”

Wayne takes less than two seconds to reach Eddie, pulling him into a bone crushing hug. “I love you so much, you little bastard. Don’t you ever, ever do this to me again.”

It's all Eddie can do to remain upright and hug him back, clinging to his shirt like he's eleven years old again.

Wayne gives him an overview of what he's missed after the Upside Down came into their world (he heard that part from El and Mike, against the better wishes of Doctor Owens). Learns that Wayne and Steve live in Steve's childhood home because his parents just gifted it to him, apparently. That Wayne is only part time at the plant now due to an accident he had, and how that sparked his current living conditions.

Learns that Steve and Wayne became close because, unbelievably, Steve Harrington goes to his grave in the cemetery and cleans off graffiti on the regular.

Eddie feels a little hot under the collar because his brain reminds him of a fact he’d heard once; that the author of Frankenstein lost her virginity on her mother’s grave and a little voice in the back of his head whispers that it'd be hot for him to do the same thing with Steve on his own grave.

He has to scamper to the bathroom to scold himself in the mirror because he cannot be having these kinds of thoughts about Steve while talking to his uncle!

Wayne asks him, the night before their flight, “what’s something you want to do, once everything is settled and life starts to feel normal again?”

“I wanna go on a vacation. Like, a real, bona fide, family vacation.”

“Where you wanna go?”

“Think I’d like to see the ocean.”

Wayne smiles softly. “Alright. When you feel ready for it, we’ll go.”

“Just give him a chance, Eddie,” Wayne says randomly, as they wait to board their flight to Indianapolis.

“Give him a chance? As if I’d waste it,” Eddie feels breathless at just the thought. It's certainly not helping that stupid crush he's been harboring for years, knowing how Steve’s been treating his uncle. It was one thing to watch Steve defend Jeff that one time in high school; it's an entirely different ball game knowing he's watched over his uncle with care and devotion for years. “He took care of you when I couldn’t. He cares. I don’t think there’s a chance I wouldn’t give him.”

“How long have you had a thing for Steve?”

Eddie's brain screeches to a halt because he was didn't think anything he'd just said would give him away. He can't even think of a reply good enough to throw his uncle off his trail. “That’s not- why would you think- when have I ever!?”

“You think I wouldn’t know this about you?” Wayne chuckles.

No. No, Eddie thinks, of course you could take one look at me and know. His uncle had been able to know everything about him so effortlessly. But Eddie doesn't have to answer, so he won't. “So, we’ll be living with Steve Harrington? Will he… be okay with me being there?”

“Yeah. Steve and I had each other when we needed it. Now I need you, so Steve won’t mind at all," Wayne sounds so sure, so convinced, that Eddie is too.

Eddie smiles, pulling a strand of his hair to hide his face behind as he imagines getting to eat at the same dinner table as Steve fucking Harrington. He doesn't even mind that Wayne gives him a look at says 'you are being so obvious right now' because he is. He knows he is. He's allowed to be. Wayne's not going to mock him for his crush.

On the drive from Indianapolis to Hawkins, Wayne tells him the lie he told Steve. Apparently, Steve thinks Eddie's dad is coming to stay for a while. The mere thought of that sets Eddie on edge, even though he knows Wyatt Munson's still in prison. Will be for a long time, with the list of shit they got him for.

They roll into Hawkins shortly after, and while Eddie may have not been in Hawkins the last five years, and he's willing to admit that things might have changed things up since they did have to rebuild a lot of the town, he's certain that Steve's house is on the other side of it. “This isn’t the way to the Harrington house."

“Steve won’t be there. He comes here when he’s overwhelmed," Wayne says. It's still pretty jarring to hear Wayne talk about Steve like this. Like he knows him. Which, he does, obviously, because they've gotten to know each other.

Still mind blowing to think about.

“The cemetery?” is what comes out of his mouth, though.

Wayne knows what's he's really meaning to ask, though, because he shrugs and says, “we both come talk to you. Steve always starts with the bad news, you know. I think you should start with good news. Just this once." The car is slowing down, and Wayne is pointing out the front windshield, to a figure crouched down near a lone headstone. "Ah. See, there he is.”

Steve. He's too far away for Eddie to be sure sure but if anyone is still wearing bright polo shirts tucked into light wash jeans this far after leaving high school, it'd be Steve Harrington. Eddie's not even sure the car is fully stopped when he all but falls out of it.

He doesn't run to greet Steve, because that's a bit dramatic, but he's not too proud to admit he might be power walking. He slows down when he gets closer, coming to a full stop just close enough to hear Steve talking to his grave. Talking to him.

"Bad news, Eds. I'm too much of a coward to meet your old man. Afraid of what he'll sound like. Because I want him to sound like you so fucking bad it hurts. So instead of being home, I'm hiding here."

"Well, I've some bad news for you, too, Stevie. I got my voice from my mom," Eddie says, and almost instantly cringes because Wayne literally just told him to start with good news and he didn't. Eddie doesn't have much time to soak in his embarrassment, though, because Steve whips around so fast that Eddie's dizzy from the movement.

Steve looks older but it's in the way people who have seen more than their fair share of Hell look older, and less about actual aging. His eyes are wide and stunned. Eddie watches as his jaw moves but no words come out. He looks like he's seen a ghost which... ok, that's fair.

"Umm," Eddie says, a little worried he's broken him when Steve doesn't even seem to be blinking as he stares at Eddie. "Good news, Steve. I, uh, I lived. Kinda. El kinda pulled me back to the surface of my mind, or whatever, and Owens did a good job at patchin' up the goods here," he gestures to his whole body with a sweeping motion of his hand and wishes that a gate to the Upside Down would open beneath his feet and suck him back to Hell because could he be any more embarrassing?

"A-are you," he watches as Steve swallows and takes a deep breath. He's still not sure Steve has blinked yet. "real?"

"Yeah," Eddie nods, taking a few steps closer, "yeah, I'm real. I'm here and alive and real."

Steve launches himself forward then, meeting him halfway. It's so goddamn surreal be witness to how tenderly Steve actually reaches out to him, though, such a contrast to the flurry of movement he'd been just a second ago. Eddie stays still as Steve lifts shaking hands to cup his face with, pushing against his cheeks as if to test whether or not Eddie is solid. Those hands slide down, along his neck, across his shoulders, down his arms where Steve seems to need to pause and collect himself again, hands wrapped loosely around his arms just below his elbows while Steve shuts his eyes and a low, broken sound pulls itself from his throat before his eyes open again, wet with tears, and he releases Eddie just long enough to throw his arms around his neck and pull him into a hug almost as crushing as the one he shared with his uncle.

It's overwhelming in this moment. To see how much he means to Steve and not fully understand how he came to mean anything to him at all.

Doesn't stop him from wrapping his own arms around Steve's waist, though.

It goes like this.

He gets his own room at Harrington's house. Wayne has his own room, too. How strange it is, to not have his uncle sleeping the day away on the couch because the trailer had one room and he'd given it to Eddie.

They adjust to living together so seamlessly. Like they were always meant to be family.

They have dinner together. Real homecooked meals. Which isn't a novelty for Wayne and Steve anymore, but Eddie's memory ends five years ago, when his dinners consisted of microwavable meals or left over snacks from lunch. Wayne cooks on the days when Steve works, and Eddie helps. Gets to be taught how to cook.

For a while, Eddie is afraid to leave the house. Even knowing that Jason Carver bit the dust the same day he was supposed to also doesn’t help. He only goes places with Wayne and Steve, and even then, the double takes people send his way are enough to make him want to shrink into himself.

However, no one says anything to him. He's vaguely aware that everyone here lived through some sort of miniature apocalypse and maybe that's the kind of thing that has to happen to make a small town in Indiana change.

He and Steve dance around each other. He can feel it. There is something here, between them, that neither fully acknowledges.

He tries to talk to Wayne about it, but he won't give him much to go on.

"I won't be the one to say anything about what Steve thinks of you. That's gotta come from Steve. I will say this. He's waiting for you to bring it up first."

"Why does it have to be me?"

"He's had five years to gather his thoughts and emotions," Wayne levels him with a Look, "you gotta have the time to figure yourself out, too."

Well, fuck.

Steve waits until it's almost summer break for the kids (they’re not really kids anymore, though, but Eddie’s adjusting to that still) to ask if he's ready to face them. "It'll be a lot to handle," Steve says as he sits next to Eddie on their couch (their couch. He can't believe that's a truth in his life right now). "Eleven and Mike haven't told anyone yet, but they want to. It wasn't just Wayne and I that grieved for you."

"I know," Eddie says, "I know. I'm good. I'm alive and here and I want them to know about it."

Steve nods slowly, not fully focused on Eddie. Eddie's come to know that means he's thinking, so Eddie waits for him to speak. "Would you prefer to meet with everyone... one at a time?"

"What's the other option?"

"Well, I always host a barbeque when they all come back. Could tell everyone all at once. Like ripping off a Band-Aid."

Eddie crooks a smile because he's a bit mischievous and his mind instantly plays a scene where he walks into a backyard full of all the people he's come to care for, and who care for him, and he's trying to best to be casual about it in this fantasy. "Yeah. Let's do the barbeque thing."

"Bad news, Stevie," Eddie whispers as he leans against the wall next his closed door, trying not to hyperventilate. "I don't know if I can do this."

Steve reaches out and takes one of Eddie's hands in his own, linking their fingers like it's a casual thing they do all the time when it's most certainly not. "Good news, Eds. You don't have to. We didn't tell anyone you're here. You can stay in your room until they're gone, and we'll figure out another way to tell them."

Eddie squeezes his eyes shut and thinks he might be crushing all the bones in Steve's hand with how hard he's clenching it. "What if they're mad at me?"

Steve understands the real question Eddie is asking, the one he doesn't know how to phrase. "You were dead, Eds, and no one out in that yard is going to be 'mad' about any time they'd spent grieving over you. There's gonna be a lot of tears, man, like a lot. Maybe even some shouting. None of it done in anger."

"How're you sure?"

Steve lifts his unoccupied hand and cups Eddie's check. Steve’s eyes are watery and his voice is a bit choked, but he says, "because I was there. I saw them through their grief. Everyone in the backyard either loves you already, or they will."

It's so fucking intimate, how close they are, how tenderly Steve touches him. Wayne had said he'd need to take the first step, so he blames Wayne when he blurts out, "what about everyone in this room? They love me, too?"

Steve's eyes go wide in surprise before his whole face lights up in a way Eddie has never seen before. It makes Steve look younger, less haunted, and then Steve whispers, "of course I love you," like there is no other answer Steve could have given.

Eddie grabs a handful as Steve's polo shirt and pulls him close enough to kiss.

Butterflies and fireworks erupt within Eddie. Kissing Steve is so much better than he's ever let himself imagine. They're still holding hands and Steve's still got his other hand resting so softly on his cheek and Steve's lips are kinda chapped but fuck does the briefest touch of their lips together make Eddie lose all his breath.

It's not deep, or all consuming. There's not even an exchange of tongue. Steve kisses him softly, gently, pulls back to pepper little kisses all over Eddie's face that has him blushing more than he's ever done in his life, and Steve places one, two, three more kisses to his lips before pulling back to look at Eddie like he's the answer to every prayer Steve's ever had. It makes his knees weak.

"I think," Eddie pauses to lick his lips, "I think I'll be brave enough to do it if you're holding my hand."

"Just try and pry yourself away, Munson," Steve teases. "Whenever you're ready."

Steve was right about the tears and shouting. He was also right that no one is mad at him.

Dustin hugs him so hard they fall over in the yard and Eddie finds himself part of a dog pile that starts with crying that turns into laughter that leads back into crying, everyone grabbing at him and him grabbing back.

It's emotional. It's overwhelming. It's the best fucking day of Eddie Munson's life.

Doctor Owens reaches out towards the end of summer to let him know they're issuing him a new social security card. Eddie asks if he's allowed to change him name. Owens says yes.

"Bad news first, Eddie," Eddie says to himself as he kneels in front of his own headstone. "You've become so boring and normal, no one vandalizes your grave anymore. Good news, though. Means I can do it myself."

Before him is his headstone, a thick red line painted through his death date. Another more carefully applied line is struck through his middle name. Above it he's painted in block letters 'Wayne'.

"Eddie, come on! This road trip's gonna start without you," Steve calls from where he's leaning against the side of Wayne's pickup.

Eddie is satisfied with his work, so he abandons the paint and returns to the pickup. He slides across the bench seat, one leg pretzeled under himself to be out of the way of the gear shift. Steve follows in after, shutting the door and reaching for Eddie's hand automatically.

He's got Wayne to his left, Steve to his right, and the first family vacation he's ever taken in his life ahead of him.

Good news, Eddie Wayne Munson. Maybe everyday going forward can be the best fucking day of your life.

#steddie #my fic #bad news first eddie #its complete!!!#thank you for all the wonderful comments #i tried to tag everone so im sorry if i missed you!

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marycorcaroli · 8 months

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yandere!zoro x inventor!reader.

req: hiii 🙈 maybe you can do yandere zoro x inventor! reader hcs. the reader is basically the inventor of the crew, she can make stink bombs, explosives, and overall, just great gadgets. the reader can't fight with swords or do hand to hand combat but uses her inventions to help her out, zoro kind of becomes protective of her. this is so long whew!!

mary♡: thanks for the request 🌷, i hope you enjoy it, i tried really hard💗 ! iapologize for my mistakes, english is not my first language 🤧

zoro loves you infinitely much, you are the perfect girl for him, but he is just a traumatized asshole who is afraid to make the first move and show his love, but there is one problem, zoro won't let someone hurt you verbally or physically, he would go crazy.

you were beautiful in everything, you could do everything he couldn't and teach him to be better. i think zoro could spend hours watching you do something useful to protect the team, your graceful hands going through what seems like such heavy and hard elements, but you still look beautiful. you can't even imagine how proud zoro was of you when you unveiled your new bomb or explosive that could defeat anything and everything. zoro would never say out loud how wonderful you are, his ego wouldn't let him, but if someone else did, i'm afraid that person would be dead in seconds.

zoro knew you couldn't defend yourself with your hands and was always afraid that you would be found by other pirates who wanted to avenge themselves and you wouldn't be able to beat them, it breaks zoro into tiny little pieces, he thinks about it every night or even every night he thinks about you and how he wants to have you all to himself.

zoro is very possessive, he won't let you go anywhere. you want to go with luffy to help him? nah, how about you stay here and just be quiet with zoro? simple, he's very scared for you and himself too. zoro can't see his future without you, he'll be a literal monster if he loses you, his brain will stop functioning properly and he won't be able to see anything but the blood of the people who took you from him.

it was his biggest mistake, to try to hurt you, to make you cry and leave you bruised in a horrible shade of purple. god, everyone knew zoro was crazy when he saw the pirate next to you, trying to hit you and take the key to the cabin where all your inventions were.

zoro ran towards you, imagining the most horrible ways to kill this fearless pirate who was trying to touch you. zoro was at your side in seconds and threw the man away from you to the farthest corner of the ship, odd that he didn't die from that.

"are you okay? did he hurt you? where did he touch you? " zoro said all this out of breath, he was short of breath from the anger he was feeling, his eyes were running all over your body and face, he was trying to make sure you were okay, but the bruise on your face said otherwise, zoro's eyes were even more aggressive than they had been in a couple seconds, he was literally on fire, his hands were tense and veins were showing on his forehead from how hard he was squeezing you and he didn't want to let go but he had to.

"zoro, it's okay, it doesn't hurt, don't worry about me, h-he wanted to steal all the things i've been doing for so long, but-he didn't have time, i-i wanted to fight back but nothing would come out, i'm sorry, please."

zoro didn't hear your voice, he was terrified of what he wanted to do to that pirate and then keep you all to himself.

zoro will start with something small, just beating him until he hears him begging for forgiveness, but he doesn't care anymore. he hurt you and made you feel fear, which means zoro will do the same thing to him, only a few thousand times worse, he will make the man feel the fear he never felt.

at the end when you ask zoro to stop, he will, but stop for a couple seconds to do something else.

"no one can touch y/n and survive after that, no one. " zoro said it with the coldest look, "you tried to take her from me, but it didn't work and it never will. my face is the last thing you'll see before you go burn in hell."

zoro's words left you shocked, he had never said those words before, you had no idea how he really felt about you, but now it all fell into place.

you are his treasure, his air, his life, you are his completely, not from that moment but from the moment you first met you have always been only his. today, zoro made it obvious to everyone here. you don't have to worry anymore, no one will dare to hurt you or just come near you, zoro won't let them. he will kill them all and spill all that blood for you, he will do anything to keep you with him. and if you think he is too aggressive and you don't want to be with him, he will make you.

#one piece #one piece live action #one piece x reader #one piece x you #roronoa zoro #zoro x reader #zoro x y/n #roronoa zoro x reader #yandere!zoro #yandere boy #nonnie's req <3 #nonnie <3 #mary ♡#mackenyu

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eiflawriting · 1 year

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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐎𝐎 𝐓𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐃

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐢 𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐨

(✧) ─ 𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 quick lovemaking after a long day at work...

(✧) ─ 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔! black woman who uses she/her pronouns. established relationship (husband!wife), chubby!reader, non sorcerer modern au. usage of profanity, masturbation, spooning position, mating press (towards the end) praise kink, spit kink, breeding kink, squirting, creampie, terms of endearment — sweetheart, angel, dear, baby, my love, etc. a quickie, but very soft and sensual. kento is just a very h*rny man who craves his wife's touch. this has slight plot but it’s pretty fast paced! 2.6k word count.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀(✧) ─ 𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒔

hey y'all. this will be my last fanfic of the year, and of course it's my husband kento. i was inspired by this five second clip. don't even know who that is, but i was like whew. ART CREDIT — ilameys via twitter. be prepared for this to be a husband!wife series. who knows? hehe. don't have much to say, but i hope y'all enjoy. HAPPY NEW YEAR. 🥂 interactions would be greatly appreciated. ♡ eighteen plus only. MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. available to read on ao3

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ click here to check out my masterlists. ♡

𝑾𝑯𝑨𝑻 𝑨 𝑳𝑶𝑵𝑮 𝑫𝑨𝒀 𝑨𝑻 𝑾𝑶𝑹𝑲 𝑻𝑯𝑨𝑻 𝑪𝑨𝑼𝑺𝑬𝑫 𝑵𝑨𝑵𝑨𝑴𝑰 𝑻𝑶 𝑹𝑬𝑻𝑼𝑹𝑵 𝑯𝑶𝑴𝑬 𝑳𝑨𝑻𝑬—again. It was probably the fourth time this week doing so. Being a salaryman wasn't easy. Long shifts. Lack of sleep. Barely having the time to tend to his personal life. This was a lifestyle that Nanami was used to and ultimately okay with. However, that all changed when he met his beautiful wife, Y/N. She was his joy. Everything he did was for the sake of their future together, but along the way, he couldn't help but feel as if he was neglecting her.

Although work can be crazy at times, this week was busier than usual, causing his time with Y/N to be limited. He missed her dearly. The most time he had with her this week was fifteen minutes in the morning while eating breakfast or when she would bring his lunch to him at work. Whatever time spent, he was sure to cherish. But the personal joys they did together, such as reading books, going to museums, or a stroll in the city, is what he really wanted.

Nanami looked forward to the weekend because he knew he would use off time to make up for lost time with Y/N.

He returned home, and to his surprise, a plate of food was on the table, wrapped up and awaiting his arrival. He cursed himself for allowing this to happen again. Eating meals were his staple with Y/N, especially dinner since it would just be them talking about how their day went.

After heating up the food to eat, which tasted just as good as if it was freshly made, he went to shower in the guest bathroom downstairs so he wouldn't wake up Y/N. As he was showering, his thoughts got the best of him.

What if she leaves me? I wouldn't be surprised if she finds someone else to give her the attention she deserves.

Why was Nanami thinking this way? He didn't know. But his thoughts soon became lewd. Fuck, he desperately needed Y/N. It's been almost a week since they had sex. Her pussy was his home, and he yearned for her comfort.

He missed the taste of her arousal lingering on his tongue. How she wrapped around him, moaning his name. He was deprived of Y/N's touch and only wished it was her who was currently stroking his cock for him. She did a much more suitable job. The two-hand twist combo she does—yeah, he needed that. Nanami knew he wouldn't be able to control himself the next time he had an opportunity fucking his wife.

His strokes increased with the thought of Y/N in mind. Her beautiful full, saggy tits that he enjoyed putting his dick in between. He took his time to cherish her thick body with kisses, outlining every stretch mark with his tongue. Her ass, decorated with cellulite and waves resembling the ocean, would form when she took him from the back. His favorite place to hold was her love handles. She was slightly insecure about them, but Nanami vowed to handle them with extra love.

She was simply perfect.

Seeing her kneel before him to suck him off, pretty plush lips parting around his cock. Gosh, why were these thoughts flooding his mind? Maybe that was why he was moaning Y/N's name low enough so only he could hear. He needed to fuck her. His dick was aching for her pussy. It only took Nanami thinking about how ethereal she looked while cumming before a spray of his bitters hit the shower wall. His grunts were low yet harsh, nearly gasping for air. Such a satyromaniac he was.

Once Nanami was done with his shower and masturbation session, he went upstairs to join Y/N in bed. Before doing so, he stood in the doorframe to watch her peacefully sleep. She was so damn beautiful. Living in a high-rise condo had its perks, and witnessing how the moonlight descended upon her dark brown skin was one of them. Even nature was captivated by Y/N's beauty. Sometimes Nanami even questions how he was so blessed to marry a woman like her?

He watched Y/N a bit longer before walking to the dresser to grab briefs to wear. Nanami's preparation for bed included moisturizing his skin and spraying Y/N's favorite cologne that she gifted him—Bleu de Chanel. After doing his quick routine, he quietly slipped into bed to give Y/N a kiss on the cheek and have his arms find her waist to take comfort. Spooning her was a feeling Nanami would never grow weary of.

As he slowly intertwined his fingers with Y/N, he felt her bringing his hands to her lips to place delicate kisses.

"Hi, Ken. You're home," Y/N said softly in her sleepy voice. Even so, she sounds sweet.

"Hi, my love. I'm sorry for waking you."

"No, it's okay, baby. I was waiting for you anyways—" She yawns, "but I kind of dozed off."

He sat up a bit to look at her while talking. "It's only my own fault for returning home late. However, I told you not to wait for me, sweetheart. I don't want you to lose sleep because of me."

"It's okay, Kento—I want to." Y/N rested her hand on his cheek to gently brush her thumb on his bottom lip. Even through heavy eyes, she looked at him with such tenderness. Nanami held Y/N's wrist to lean into her touch. This is what he looked forward to when coming home.

She continued,

"How was your day?"

"It wasn't too bad. I have no complaints about how I'm ending it," he replied with a small smile.

"Did you eat the food I left on the table?"

"I did. It was delicious. Thank you, dear."

"Anything for you." While massaging his bottom lip, she puckered her own to ask for a kiss, which Nanami happily gave.

The first few smooches started innocently, becoming familiar with the sweetness of her raspberry-flavored gloss that she always wore to bed. But Nanami's urges tempted him to do more. He left gentle kisses on Y/N's face before trailing down her neck. The kisses were filled with libido, nipping on her flesh to pull those faint whimpers from her chest. The sound alone had adrenaline rushing to his cock.

Nanami reached under the covers to ascend his hand up her nightgown to massage the plushness of her ass, slowly creeping his fingers between her folds. She pulled off the covers so he could have better access to feel her pussy, opening her legs up.

Y/N's wetness caused Nanami to curse against her skin, yet he felt selfish for waking her up for his sexual desires. So he began to pull away.

"I'm sorry, my love. You're tired. We shouldn't be doing this."

She pulled him back to her lips. "No, Ken, please. I need you, baby. Just a quick one from the side, okay?"

How could he say no to that?

He kissed her passionately, immediately forcing his tongue to the back of her throat. In between smooches, Nanami told Y/N how much he loved and missed her, pulling down his briefs to give himself a few strokes. He lifted her leg up to swipe his dick along her heated wetness. She moaned into his mouth, which he devoured while aligning himself with her entrance to push his way through.

Y/N nipped on his bottom lip to let out a lingering whine upon feeling her pussy split open. A week feels like forever since they were engulfed in each other's warmth. However, for Nanami? He just knew he would bust quickly.

Being inside Y/N felt like sitting on a cloud. No worries. Just peace. Her juices produced heat that could keep his cock warm on a cold day in the city. Nanami continued to slide in her walls until his tip met with that sweet spot that made her a mewling mess. Upon the meeting, he began thrusting.

He hooked Y/N's leg over his forearm as he pounded her pussy. The tips of his ears burned red due to hearing those soft sounds of pleasure airing past her lips. The gushing of her pussy acted as a harmony that resonated with the moans she was already producing. She croaked, no begged Nanami to fuck her harder because she was just as deprived of him.

Nanami had no complaints about working his thigh muscles. Hearing Y/N desire him always motivated him to deliver her climax sooner. There was something about fucking her wet fat pussy that made him hornier than usual. Perhaps thrusting past Y/N's puffy folds decorated with strands of hair had something to do with it? He couldn't explain it, but the hair on her pussy added an extra pleasure that he loved.

He gave her a sensual smooch, then ghosted his lips over hers to watch her eyes light up in great delight.

"Ken—this feels so good," Y/N purred.

"No, you feel so good. I miss you so much. You've been such a good girl keeping this pussy nice and warm for me. You're squeezing me perfectly."

"I love you."

His dick twitched. "Fuck, I love you, too, sweetheart. My perfect angel."

His drive now resembled a wild animal. He didn't know where to place his hands. One minute they were rubbing her tits, the next it was toying with her clit. Nanami was fucking Y/N as if there was no tomorrow, balls slapping against her ass. The sounds of her pussy gushing began to heighten in volume. Anyone listening would think it was a steamy porno video, but it was just two lovers making sweet love to each other.

If Y/N was tired before, she was definitely awake now. Despite that, she knew this quick fuck would put her to sleep. She loved his dick. So long and girthy, every inch filling her insides to feel the veins engrave her walls. Y/N wasn't the one to boost a man's ego by saying her pussy was theirs, but she would scream at the top of her lungs to let the world know it was Nanami's.

Being a good husband and good dick will definitely have you this way.

Y/N pulled her tits out of the nightgown she was wearing. Without asking, of course, Nanami swallowed her breast to suck while fucking her. With every thrust he took, her nerves increased. It would only take a few more until she came over his cock. Her moans were breathy yet clear. Lips held agape while droplets of drool coated the side of her mouth. Her pussy clenched and unclenched Nanami, stuck between not wanting to let go and almost ready to let go.

After sucking on her tits, Nanami detached from them with a pop to look at Y/N. How could someone look this beautiful while being stuffed with cock? He was close to cumming from just watching her, but feeling her? Pussy painting his dick white? The juices leaking between her thighs and remnants on his balls, their sheets? His eyes rolled back at the sensation. If Nanami didn't know any better, his toes were also curling.

"I'm sorry for being away from this for so long, sweetheart. Fuck, I can't stress enough how amazing you feel. How are you this wet?"

"It's okay, baby," Y/N whimpered. Why does she sound like that? It's like her voice was filled with honey.

He nodded, giving her soft smooches. "Yeah, it's okay? Hm?"

"Y-Yes, Ken. I-I'm so close. 'M want more."

He slammed into her pussy at full force while rubbing mercilessly at her needy bud. He began moaning her name and calling her a good girl for taking him so well. Their brown irises were blown with pure lust as they held contact with each other. Y/N placed her hand on the back of his neck to pull him closer. She stuck out her tongue, and Nanami never expected he had a spitting kink until he met Y/N. He allowed a long string of spit to drip into her mouth before meeting her lips again.

The kiss was sloppy, loud, and obnoxious. The power in his thrusts was beyond him. Y/N's pussy just felt too good not to fuck like this. Pussy like this was bound to make him a satyromaniac. Pussy like this makes him want to breed her.

"This pussy is so good, angel. I want to fuck my cum deep inside you and make you a mommy. Would you like that?" Nanami rasped.

"Oh God, yes. Yes, Kento. Please cum in my pussy. Make me a mommy." Y/N's hand trailed down his spine, stopping at his lower back to pat repeatedly. She was there. She was—"Baby, keep fucking me like this. I'm cumming."

"Fuck, Y/N."

He quickly pulled out to turn Y/N on her back to pin both her thighs back as far as they could. Before Nanami slid back in, he slapped his cock on her clit to hear that pretty sure of her pussy gushing. The feeling of returning inside her was even warmer than before. Nanami pounded into her at a steady pace but ensured every thrust was passionate. Hearing Y/N scream out his name only gave him more motivation.

She gripped the sheets beneath her doing her best to take this deep fucking from Nanami. To have the energy to fuck like this after a long day at work was mind-blowing to Y/N. But not as blown as her pussy. She whimpered through every last thrust until her vision blurred and tears pricked the corner of her eyes. She stared at Nanami. He always fucks her well. However, this? This was more than usual. What's gotten into him? Why was he fucking her like this?

"Ken…" came out as a faint whisper.

She orgasmed.

While looking into his crisp brown eyes, she saw stars. Her walls were contracting uncontrollably around him. Seven minutes of being fucked into oblivion of ecstasy. Words couldn't even come through due to them tangling in her throat. Just breathy moans that were hitched. She repeatedly mouthed, "Thank you, I love you," because that's how she truly felt. Fucked and in love.

And it didn't take a while for Nanami to follow behind.

As he continued to fuck Y/N through her orgasm, squirt splashed between them and leaked down their sheets. Heat rushed to the center of his face. An overflow of his cum shot through the tip of his cock to flood her pussy. Harsh curse words sinfully slipped through Nanami's lips as soon as his release came, but his powerful thrusts didn't stop. He wanted to ensure he milked every last bit of his seeds in Y/N as deep as possible. Nanami was very serious about making her a mother.

The coiled moans finally unravel in Y/N's throat upon feeling his heated cum ooze in her pussy. She continued by expressing gratitude for the long-needed orgasm she yearned for.

Nanami eventually halted his thrusts to allow his cock to get cozy in her pussy. He unpinned her thighs to let them wrap around his waist, and she did the same with her arms to pull him into a passionate kiss. While swirling tongues, Nanami slowly pulled out, to which they shared a final moan.

Y/N felt complete with the amount of cum marinating in her pussy. And when remnants attempted to leak out, Nanami would swirl his finger inside of her to push them back in. She knew this would definitely be enough to get her pregnant.

After a few more kisses, Nanami rolled on his back to let out a heavy breath. He pulled Y/N onto his chest to kiss her forehead softly.

"Was I too rough with you toward the end?"

"Hm, kinda. But honestly—I loved it. I wouldn't mind if you fucked me like that from time to time," Y/N answered.

He chuckled. "I'll keep that in mind."

𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙠 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜. 𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙗𝙚 𝙜𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙙. ♡

𝙩𝙖𝙜𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙜 ── @dejwrites @maydayaisha @ayyy-pee @beniswife @babykaz @maginxlia @sexbob-ombbeck @softimgyu @sunnytalia3 @violxtbxbyy @potofstewie @aiyaaayei @aizensballsweat @diamondoidxx @abbarattion @kentovana @blackfangedreaper @sirenh4ll @adorabubblesblog @succubusonthedoorstep @zyettemoon1800 @wang-lizard @arminlator @jellymantra33 @si00p @carriesblenders @6kuna @cienakim @510hz @doumalove

#anime x black!reader #anime smut #nanami x black!reader #nanami x reader #nanami x chubby reader #nanami kento x black reader #nanami kento x reader #jjk smut #jjk x black reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kaisen x black reader #jjk nanami #nanami x you #fanfic smut #jujutsu kaisen x reader

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theepisceswriter · 9 months

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Dominating/ Pegging AOT men pt. 1 (Reiner & Zeke)

A/N: another request from my stoned thot anon, blessing us all with their request ideas. WE FUCKING MEN IN THE ASS ALL 2023!!!

TW: mommy kink for Reiner, Power bottom meanie Zeke, and your usual freaky shit, 18+

REINER

Bye, why wouldn't the king of mommy kink allow you to dom and peg him!?!?!? If anything, HE'S the one who introduced the idea of you being something like a dominatrix for him and you were more than happy to comply. It fits the natural dynamic of your relationship too well.

The very first night the two of you incorporated it in the bedroom he was a moaning pink flustered mess underneath you and you were so wet that the strap kept shifting out of place. From then on the two of you knew it was going to be a staple in the bedroom.

He thoroughly enjoys allowing you to have access to him in such a vulnerable way and how good you make him feel.

"Thank you so much mommy for fucking me so good, you make me feel so good", "No one else could ever make me feel as good as you do, mommy. No one.", "You fuck and treat me so well, I can't wait until it's my turn to put my cock in you and make you feel just as good."

He looks absolutely angelic during all this nasty dirty talk; eyes doe and slightly teary, cheeks rosy and tear-stained, and gazing up at you with nothing but pure adoration.

You two indulge in all types of gadgets and positions to keep things spicy and not boring. Both of you guys' favorite position is missionary. There's something about you being able to see Reiner's face contort with pleasure while you're deep into him and stroking his cock that stirs up something feral in you. And he enjoys watching you just as much.

This man's stamina is like a horse's. As soon as you're done fucking him and making sure he reaches his climax, he's on you like bees on honey. He wastes no time in pounding you with his cock even if he was satisfied from the night already, your pleasure is equally as important to him and he won't stop until he's sure that you're just as satisfied as him. Even if he is tired.

His favorite way to thank you is by letting you sit on his face and use his tongue as you please. He'll lift you on his face right after you're done fucking him, it's his favorite to wiggle his tongue through the straps of the strap-on and find your sweet swollen clit to suck on like a pacifier.

Best believe the aftercare is A1 too. The best pillow talk and cuddling sessions to exist in history.

ZEKE

Zeke won’t let you full-on peg him, but I can see him being into less intense butt stuff like rimming or even letting you put a finger or two up there for added sensation but that's as far as that goes for him.

BUT, He does like giving you control in the bedroom every now and then because it's amusing to him that you think you can even do that.

P O W E R BOTTOM THROUGH AND TRUE. This man is a verbal sadistic

"You really think you can fuck me better than I can fuck you", "So cute seeing those dainty fingers try and work my hole when you can barely get them to wrap around my cock", "I could flip you over right now and have you under me faster than you can get a moan out."

Nights when he allows you to take control always end up being the most frustrating ones because he's cocky as hell and doesn't shut up. His comebacks are too quick and witty for you to think of faster ones as a baby dom, but you're getting there. All this egging on and torment is really just to turn you into his perfect dom. He wants you to mean it when you tell him to shut up and make you cum 3 times in a row or he won't come at all. It's your aggressiveness and frustration with him that really turns him on.

The more comfortable you two get with this arrangement the more you find out how crazy humiliation makes him. One night you said something along the lines of, "No wonder you won't let me peg you; this pathetic hole couldn't take a fake cock even if it wanted to." THE MAN WAS TOO STUNNED TO SPEAK BUT WHEW ! I don't think he even knew that he enjoyed humiliation that much and you knew he loved it from the way his cheeks turned the same color as the tip of his cock and not to mention the precum that was flowing down his shaft like a river.

Your rim jobs have a tranquilizing effect on him and he requests one almost every time he gets oral from you. Feeling the hot warm muscle that is your tongue poke and prod at the most sensitive and fleshy part of his body leaves him gripping the edge of the bed until his knuckles turn white.

It's your favorite sight; Him with his mouth slightly agape, chest vibrating with groans, and his t-shirt slightly pushed up farther on his abdomen revealing the muted gold happy trail leading to his dick. And you being the demon that you are, of course you add in a handjob that has him shooting strings of cum on his stomach when he reaches his climax.

#had to feed my aot girlies too #(this is a two year old draft too)#Spicy.#aot x reader #aot smut #attack on titan x reader #attack on titan fanfiction #attack on titan smut #attack on titan headcanons #reiner braun smut #reiner braun fanfiction #reiner braun x reader #reiner braun headcanons #zeke jaeger smut #zeke jaeger x reader #zeke yeager x reader #zeke jaeger headcanons

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freesia-writes · 5 months

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Lil Life Update for Y'all <3

I've been a lil cryptic or back-n-forth, I think, and just wanted to share a little bit about what's been going on. I say it's not for attention but who knows what motives lurk under there, LOL. It's mostly because I love you all and want to let you in, also hope that it's encouraging or connective for anyone else who's experienced the same, and also I just miss the community I have sooooo loved here. 🥹

I'm a 34yo female with 2 kids aged 4 and 7. I had depression like crazy during and after my second pregnancy especially. In Aug 2021, my primary doc suggested I try something like Zoloft since I'd been complaining of irritability, no capacity, constant worry, and other anxiety symptoms. When I did feel some relief and felt encouraged that I could "feel like myself" again, I pursued solutions for other issues I was noticing. Over the last year and a half, it's been quite a ride. ADHD symptoms led to Adderall for 4 days, then Wellbutrin for a few months, then Buspar for a few months, then Strattera (tapering up and then back down) for about 3 months, then Ritalin for 1 month, which I thought was helping until we realized that the entire month of October was basically an increasingly manic episode.

Whew.

We're talkin 2007 Britney here (ok I didn't shave it but I cut my hair off into a pixie). Spent thousands on a new wardrobe of the "dark academia" style. Bought Disneyland tickets. Invested in a photography mentorship. So much energy and inspiration. Then we realized it was getting out of hand.

I had also been tapering off a lot of the meds over the last two months, so it was just a crazy cocktail of chemicals that made my brain finally go kaput. I finished the last dose of Zoloft on November 5th, and that was the last of the meds, so now I'm off everything. My therapist thought the mania was medication-induced due to all the changes plus the addition of the stimulant, so the goal was to try to allow everything to settle down and see what "baseline" is for me right now.

And it has been frickin HARD.

Cervical vertigo. All-or-nothing sleep and appetite. Extreme sensory sensitivity. Random itchiness. Racing mind. Total inability to focus. And the worst part has been the mood swings.

I'm basically having all the symptoms of bipolar disorder in a rapid-cycle format. It may be cyclothymia, or it may be the withdrawal effects from all the meds, but regardless... It's been quite the roller coaster. The nerd in me has been fascinated by the experiential knowledge of it all, since I majored in Psychology and have always loved learning about it, but the overall negative effects on me and my family have been difficult.

I'm someone who has always relied completely on being highly capable and in control. I find my worth in my productivity and competence. And it has caused increasing stress throughout my life. I've been praying for years that God would break me of it, and I can see how he is using this to do precisely that -- lovingly trying to answer my request to be freed of this relentless pursuit of the illusion of control. He's inviting me to simple, joyful life of trust. The perspective shift is so freeing when I realize that I don't need to have it all figured out because he already does, and I can just rest in his loving guidance and look to him for the next step instead of trying to plan out every possible outcome and strategy. I went on a reflective retreat in the Santa Cruz mountains and just felt so encouraged and loved in the way he invited me to let my shoulders down and to ground myself in his warm provision and care.

But the change doesn't happen overnight.

So in the middle of a total storm of bipolar symptoms -- days of mania followed by days of depressive episodes and being so new at it all that I don't know how to navigate "normal life" with all of that -- I'm also trying to rewire 34 years' worth of the way I think and act. BUT it's a blessedly simple process: the only thing I have to worry about is this moment. I can't affect the future or the past. So all I have is right now, and I can turn to God for guidance, encouragement, insight, or anything I need in this moment, and he is so faithful to give it. But man, it's easy to forget. ;)

Literally me with that right now, trying to figure it all out on my own before I remember I can't and don't need to:

Anyway, this got LONG, surprise surprise, but I've always enjoyed being vulnerable for the sake of connection and potential encouragement. And selfishly, I'd LOVE to hear from any of you who may have had similar experiences. Right now the fixation of my [very limited] capacity is on my photography business, but I've been feeling drawn to writing more and more, and have attempted a lil drabble here and there. So I'm just patiently waiting for the inspiration to return. :)

I have so appreciated the love from you all. I also haven't been as active with reading/reblogging/supporting/etc as I was, and that's just where I'm at right now, but please know that my heart is with you even if my brain is not, LOL.

If you made it this far, you get a gold star. Or a Howzer hug. Or somethin. :)

#freesia writes #mental health monday #just another manic monday #jk today was depressive

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haechvn · 1 year

Text

Is That What You Think?

Pairing: Shuri x Reader

Warning: ANGST ANGST ANGST and fluff omggg.

Summary/Request: Shuri spending a lot of time on her technology instead of the reader and the reader questions her love, THEN IT BECOMES FLUFF

Word Count: 2.2k

Author’s Note: Thank you for the request @r3dc4ndy for the idea! Takes place during Wakanda Forever so beware of spoilers. The reader is always black in my head so yeah. The link in the text goes to another Shuri fic I posted in case you haven’t read it. Shuri is daddy.

ndiyakuthanda = i love you

“You are the light of my life y’know. I love you so much my gosh,” Shuri whispered slowly, tucking two braids behind your ear and leaning forward to plant a light kiss on your right shoulder. “When I’m with you, I get to just be me. Not a princess, not a scientist or the Black Panther. Just Shuri,” gently taking your hands in hers, kissing every knuckle she could find, “and I wouldn’t want it any other way. Thank you for this baby. Happy Anniversary.” She couldn’t take her sparkling eyes off of you, nor did she try, and honestly, who could blame her?

The crispy orange sun was soon about to set on the two of you just as you were packing up the incredible picnic Shuri had set up for her princess. You wanted nothing more but to return back to the city and spend the rest of the night together as her gorgeous gorgeous lips have a lengthy conversation with yours. The other ones. Her irises watched you like a hawk as she carefully placed the blanket and fruit basket on the ground and followed you like she was after her prey. The heart-shaped herb definitely cranked up her hormones. Her soft manicured hands found their way around your hips from behind, slowly trailing up right before she reached your chest as she leaned down and glittered your neck with kisses for the hundredth time today.

“You know I had a long day of training yesterday,” gently swaying the two of you from side to side, softly giggling in your ear at how ticklish you get at the slightest touch, ”and I really wanna show you some new tricks I learned.”

Whew. She knows how to drive you crazy.

That was one month ago. One month, twelve days and sixteen hours ago. Not that you were counting. You two hadn’t broken up or anything but it seems as though someone else has caught Shuri’s eye. Rather something. Technology. It’s ironic really. Being in a relationship with one the greatest scientists on Earth, you would have thought that by now you’d be used to having to navigate this three way but something is different about it this time. She barely makes time to attend weekly councils meetings, always shows up late to her training with the Dora and she hasn’t said “ndiyakuthanda” in who knows how long. Oh yea, you do. It’s been one month, twelve days and sixteen hours. You never saw this coming at all. There were no signs or anything that stuck out to you to let you know something may be wrong. You would take on more hours at work to get your mind off of it at first but then to still see that she made no efforts to reach out to you irritated you more than words can describe.

You are always trying your best to support your lover in all of her scientific endeavors but at a certain point, something has to give. Sometimes you think you have to become a lab specialist or something just to spend more time with her. To be able to see her. That’s what has led you to the doors of her lab.

At this point you aren’t even sure about her feelings towards you. Barely any texts, calls and definitely no kisses. You don’t want to come off as a child or anything but it has started to feel a bit disrespectful so that’s why you decided to bring this up to her. Enough time has passed. If this conversation doesn’t end up the way you want it, you might have to start thinking about doing something that will make both of your hearts break. If hers is even still with you.

Shaking your head, you pushed open the doors in front of you to be greeted by dozens of lab coats running all around the room and Shuri standing on top of the vibranium tracker in order to get everyone’s attention. Your girlfriend is too dramatic. Ugh, can you even call her that anymore?

“Unless you know how to solve this equation that explains how time travel is all of a sudden possible and how there’s a freakin’ multiverse out there, I’m gonna need you to exit the room!” Shuri exclaimed at her colleagues, jumping up and down in frustration. She hasn’t noticed you enter the room as she throws a stack of paper out her hands in an attempt to calm herself down. It doesn’t work.

Clearing your throat you yell, “Shuri! Get down here. Now!”

Shuri. Shuri. Shuri. Not sweetheart. Not kitten. Just Shuri. Boy did she fuck up.

The room went silent and everyone stood oddly still. Whispers and gasps started to fill the room about oh my gosh, how can she talk to the Princess like that? and the King will definitely hear about this. The Princess in question straightened her posture and looked at you with disbelief in her eyes. You have never raised your voice at her about anything even during disagreements or arguments so this was new territory for her. You can see all the gears churning in her head and she takes a shaky breath to dismiss everyone and within seconds, the two of you are the only ones in the room. It hasn’t been like this in so long, you think.

With her standing in front of you, she looks very different. She had deep eye bags, her hair in the front crawled down to her eyebrows and it wasn’t as curly as the last time you saw her - a bit more messy if anything. Her beauty is still so breathtaking. She seems to have lost some weight around her neck and collarbone area - oh my goodness, has she not been eating? I hope she’s okay– and those lips. Ugh. You have missed having them smothering your — Nope! Don’t start that, we know why you are here. Her eyes don’t meet yours and they fall to the ground, her usually steady hands start to slightly tremble and she softly bounces on the balls of her feet.

“Do you remember me? We used to be in a relationship”, you question sarcastically, not wanting to give into whatever game she was trying to play. You scoffed as she lifted her head to open her mouth to start refuting your absolutely insane remark. “Nope. You don't get to do that. No one has ever hurt me like this before and no one ever will again. What have I done for you to push me away like this? I thought we had something that was special to you.”

Tears started forming in your eyes - you can’t help it. You are putting all out on the table. You can’t even recognize the woman standing before and the more you look at her, the more you break. Your thoughts are moving at a thousand miles per second and it feels like you can’t control anything that’s coming out of your mouth.

“How can I explain myself?” she slowly began, still dodging your piercing eyes and fully unaware of how to make things right. Shuri never really had too many friends and this is the first relationship she has ever been in but even after a whole year, she’s still making mistakes that are costing her the most important things in her life; you and your love. She never had to give people too much of her attention before but she is an adult. She’s not a child anymore and can’t afford to make decisions only for herself anymore. How can she have gone a whole month without talking to her baby?

“See, um, there’s this experiment I’m conducting right now about time travel and I got a little carried away with trying to-,” she rambled on, trying to keep her tears at bay and her voice cracking with every few words. Wow, she thinks, I sound really dumb right now and I messed the fuck up.

“Shuri, no! You can’t do that. Give me an excuse that actually makes sense! Time travel. Really?” You start pacing around the room because you can’t stand looking at her but like a wounded puppy, she follows you around, giving you space in case you throw something at her. She knows better than to think like that.

“I thought I was the light of your life. I thought we had something real and deep. I thought you loved me.” You can’t believe that this is the state of your relationship and even more so, you can’t believe what you just said. Her feelings are going to be hurt but what about yours? She has disregarded you for so long so she deserves to get a piece of your mind. It hurts more knowing that no matter what, you won’t be able to stop loving her even if you tried.

Reading your mind, her steps quicken as she turns you around and gently pushes your back against one of the many beautifully painted murals in her lab. Her head is saying no as she shakes her curls from side to side. How could I have let it go this far? How would I feel if the roles were reversed? Princess being upset is one thing but now she’s questioning my love? The one thing that has kept her going after the passing of her brother and most recently her mother. She can’t lose you too even though that thought has been eating away at her for so long. Anxiety started to creep up her spine and she felt as though she would explode any second.

“No no no no no baby no I–,” she softly whispered, placing a shaky finger on your lips so you could stop breaking her heart, “my love for you hasn’t gone anywhere. I’ve just been–. Fuck. I don’t have an excuse but I am so so sorry Princess.” There it is. Princess Shuri calling you by her own title. She knows how weak you get in the knees when she does but she is trying her best to be as sincere as possible and not play around with you. She wishes you could hear her thoughts and feel her heart. However, she’s not gonna get away with this so easily.

Shuri grabs one of your hands and places it over her heart as you try to pull away from her and create more distance between you two. It felt like your own heart was crying out in pain and there was nothing you could do to stop it.

“Stay with me, stay with me,” This last month has been so lonely for me and I haven't been able to keep my thoughts in check and it's just–,” she groans softly in frustration recalling how she hasn’t been able to get her family out of her mind for the past month. She’s alone with no uncles or aunties around her and it eats at her every single day. You have been an incredible support system for her but her mind has convinced her otherwise and that she would somehow soon lose you too. Ironically, she almost did. “I thought I could handle this on my own and be strong. I wanted to be strong for you and not burden you with my grief but I clearly need you.”

Your heart is in pieces. This whole time you were trying to figure out if you said or did something wrong but the issue has just been her mind. A battle that she seemed to be losing over and over. Your body relaxed and you threw yourself into her and held her so tightly she had to tap your shoulder so she didn’t pass out. Even though going without talking to your partner for a month is insane, you couldn’t find a place in your soul to still be upset. She is extremely lucky you are patient. Even too patient sometimes.

“It’s okay, you hear me?,” you soothe as cries ripple through her, rubbing her back to let her know you are still here. “I think we just need to find a nice balance for communication, don’t you think kitten?”

Shuri nods her head in the crevice of your neck gives you very much needed delicate kisses, missing the feeling of your skin under her lips. I’m so lucky. I’m so lucky she says to herself already thinking of all the ways she wants to make it up to you. Maybe a trip to Paris would be nice or maybe — wait no fuck France. They just tried to steal vibranium from us. We could go anywhere and travel for a whole month and every single morning I’ll wake her up with my–

“Baby. You do know you are thinking out loud right?”

Feeling more like herself again, Shuri chuckled and wiped away the remaining tears from her face. She moved to hold your head in her hands and kissed you all over.

“Oh c’mon Princess. Don’t act like you didn’t miss this. We can’t have you questioning my love for you ever again. Ndiyakuthanda baby so let me show you just how much I love you. That’s if you’d let me of course.”

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boxofbonesfic · 1 year

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Title: ᴅᴇᴠɪʟ ʙᴇᴛᴡᴇᴇɴ ᴜꜱ [5]

Pairing: Rockstar!Bucky Barnes x Reader

series masterlist || series playlist || chapter song

Summary: Drowning in women and designer drugs, Bucky Barnes of Valkyrie’s Revenge is in a race to rock bottom. Fed up, his bandmates give him an ultimatum—straighten up, or fuck off. In a last, desperate bid to maintain his place, he agrees to return to the one place he swore he’d never set foot again—home.

Warnings: Angst, Drug Addiction, Depression, Suicidal ideation, Mental Health issues, Toxicity, Recreational Drug use, Hard drug use, PTSD, Dealing with trauma, Slow Burn, Fluff, MINORS DNI, [More to be added]

A/N: whew. this chapter… i tried to warn you guys, i really did. buckle up!! as always, i recommend you listen to the chapter song while reading, or alternatively, listen to the fic playlist! thank you so much for reading! divider by @firefly-graphics

series playlist || chapter song

This work is entirely unbeta’d, and unedited. Though I don’t own any of Marvel’s characters, this work and the plot contained inside are entirely mine. I do not consent for this work to be posted anywhere else by anyone but me. Enjoy 😘

It’s Iris’ shaking that wakes you, her little hands jerking your shoulder back and forth as you blearily open your eyes to the almost total darkness.

“Mommy, mommy there’s somebody at the door,” she says, her voice nervous. You sit up, rubbing at your eyes. It takes you a moment to process what she’s said, and you listen for a few seconds, but hear only the quiet sounds of the house settling, dripping faucets, branches scratching against the plastic siding.

“Wha?” You shake your head. “No, baby, it’s bedtime, nobody comes around this late—” You’re interrupted by a fierce round of knocks—some of them so loud, you’re fairly certain the person responsible is kicking your door. It only takes a moment for you to go from sleepy to high-alert, your eyes flicking between your daughter and your bedroom door.

“See?” She whimpers, clamoring onto the bed and clutching at you. You detangle yourself from your anxious daughter, and reach under the bed for the baseball bat you keep there—just in case. Even though your heart is pounding, you know you can’t show her how scared you are—Iris is only as calm as you are.

“Kiddo, you’re going to stay right here in mommy’s room, okay? I’m going to go downstairs and see who’s at the door.” You softly close the door behind you, jumping as the doorbell rings just before the knocks resume. With sweaty hands, you grip the worn handle of your father’s bat, and edge down the stairs towards the door. You hear a loud crack, like wood splintering outside the door, and then—your name?

“Open the do-hic-ooor,” Bucky moans, and through the thick frosted glass you see him rest his forehead against the little window at the top of the door. You fumble with the chain, the bat clattering as it hits the floor. You turn the handle, and Bucky practically falls inside. He stumbles over the threshold, and you scramble to catch him so that he doesn’t clip his head on the end table. He rests heavily on you, his head lolling.

“Bucky?!” You hiss his name. “What—what are you doing?” He attempts to stand up, straightening his jacket as he shoves his hands into his pockets. You resist the urge to slam the door as he shoulders past you—you don’t need Iris more riled up than she already is. “Are you fucking crazy?”

He staggers against the wall. “I n-needed t’see you.” His watery smile is barely even that, a slight upturn at the corners of his trembling mouth before he drags the back of his hand across his sweaty forehead. “Wan’ to see you,” he repeats, slurring.

“Bucky it’s fucking two a.m.” You throw your hands up. “It’s fucking two a.m. and you are scaring my fucking kid!” You’re tempted to hit him, to slap some fucking sense into him because clearly he doesn’t have any right now. Your hand twitches at your side as you tamp the urge back down.

“My fucking kid,” he retorts, and you feel a portion of your righteous anger break off and crumble into guilt. “Isn’t s-she?” He shakes his head like he’s trying to clear it. He glares at you with lidded, red-rimmed eyes. You want to say no, you know you should, for the sake of your peace, your daughter’s peace, to uphold the promise you’d made to your parents, to yourself.

But you can’t. It won’t come. You’re floundering watching his face contort into some unnameable expression. You don’t know how he’s figured it out, how his addled brain has finally put the pieces together.

“I w-wanna see her.” He slurs, and tries to step around you. You block him, shoving him backwards.

“You’re high out of your fucking mind Bucky! I don’t even want you in my fucking house!” You shrill. “Where’s Steve?” Bucky hunches his shoulders defensively. His glassy eyes roll as he tries to deny what you can plainly see.

“‘M’not high,” he mumbles. “I—”

“Bucky you can’t even speak!” You yell, and then wince, hoping Iris isn’t listening at the top of the stairs. “You show up here at the most ungodly fucking hour, demanding to see Iris— “ You cut yourself off, pinching the bridge of your nose. “Bucky you fucking terrified her, okay? You—I’m going to call Steve.” Your exasperated words make him flinch. He tries to stop you as you reach for your phone, but his movements are heavy and slow.

“That lying piece of shit. Don’t—” He reaches for you, and you slap his hand away, your heart pounding.

“Don’t tell me what I can and cannot do in my house.”

“I’ll l-leave. If you call him.” He threatens, his voice hard. His pupils are dilated wide, his eyes wet, but you can tell he means it. You know you shouldn’t feel responsible for Bucky, not now, not ever again, but it doesn’t stop you from feeling it anyway. You scrub a frustrated hand over your face, tangling your fingers in your hair before you squeeze your eyes shut, regretting the decision before it even comes out of your mouth.

“Okay, fine,” you relent, holding your hands up. “No Steve. But you can’t see Iris like this.” Bucky looks rough. You know he’s been out partying, doing only God knows what—his eyes are red-rimmed and watery, his nose red and irritated. He looks like he’s going to argue with you, but after a moment snaps his mouth shut angrily.

“Fine.”

“You can sleep on the couch.” You say stiffly. “I’m going to go get you a blanket. Stay down here.” The words are curt, short as though you’ve bitten off their edges. He opens his mouth, and you’re not sure you want to hear what’s going to come out of it next, so you turn away, and march directly up the stairs. You wait at the top to hear the tell-tale creak of the first stair, but it doesn’t come.

For a few seconds, you pace on the landing, hands balled into fists and pressed against your closed eyes. Bucky is here. He knows. He knows. He knows. You can’t stop the endless refrain inside your own skull, panicked tears tightening your throat as you try to swallow against them.

Calm down. Iris can’t see you like this.

You take slow, hiccoughing breaths, swallowing back the tears and anger until they’re gathered into a tight, hot ball in your chest. Forcing it down, you head for your bedroom.

Your door is cracked open, and Iris peers at you guiltily through the gap. You almost want to laugh as she jumps backwards, hopping nervously from foot to foot as you cross your arms.

“I thought you were supposed to be in bed,” you say, raising an eyebrow. Iris scuffs her foot guiltily against the floor.

“I, um, I heard Mr. Bucky,” she admits, and you have to stop yourself from smacking a frustrated palm against your forehead. “Why is he here, Mommy?”

You’ve never felt more like shit than in this moment—you can’t tell her. Not like this.

“He’s… he’s not feeling well, babes. He’s going to rest downstairs, on the couch.”

Iris looks at you excitedly. “So he’ll be here for breakfast?!”

“No.” You say quickly, and her round eyes go glassy. “He has somewhere to be tomorrow morning, so he’ll be gone when we get up for school.” You’re not sure if you’re saying this for her benefit, or yours. “Into bed.” You say, patting the mattress. “You’re sleeping with me tonight.”

Bucky is standing in front of the fireplace in your living room. It doesn’t work, but the hearth serves as a display wall of sorts. Framed pictures of Iris, photos of you two together, your parents, your life. There’s a sort of sad bemusement on his face, like he can’t believe your life went on without him. That you had lived without him. You watch as he reaches forward to trace Iris’ face through the glass, and wonder if he’s looking for the parts of her that reflect him.

You clear your throat and he turns, guiltily shoving his hands into his pockets. The silence is so heavy between you, you aren’t sure if you can carry it. Luckily for you, Bucky breaks it first.

“I dunno how I didn’t see it the first time,” he says with a sad, hoarse little laugh. “She looks just fuckin’ like me.” You’re not sure what you hate more. The fact that he said it, or the fact that it was true. “Kid’s wearing my goddamn face and it took me a month to notice it.” He turns like he’s going to grab a picture off of the shelf but misjudges the distance, and stumbles against the wall with a thud.

“Jesus, Buck!” You rush over to him to stop him falling. Grunting, you loop one of his arms over your shoulders. He goes with you easily, mumbling something you don’t understand as you half drag him towards the couch. “You need to lay the fuck down.” You growl, sloughing him onto the cushions. He lands with a soft “oof”, and begins kicking at his boots.

“Hold on—christ— I’ll help you.” You tug his boots off and toss them to the floor as he curls in on himself.

You’re not sure how a man his size can look so small, so fragile, but he does. The angry, bitter part of you wants to throw the blanket and pillow on the floor in a heap, but you don’t. You spread it out over his sleeping form and he mumbles, twitching. Carefully, you reach to tuck the pillow under his head, and pause as your fingers brush his cheek. You let them linger for a moment before pulling your hand back quickly, and cradling it against your chest.

You turn sharply and head back for the staircase.

“Goodnight. Jellybean.”

His voice stops you in your tracks, the raspy word making your throat tight.

He won’t remember it in the morning.

You go upstairs.

Iris is asleep in your bed when you open the door. Sleep finds her easily, and you’re glad for it. It means she feels safe, something you don’t want to jeopardize with the man sleeping it off on your couch downstairs.

You suppose you had been lucky, not having to see him like Steve did, strung out and barely coherent. If you can help it, Iris will be spared that sight forever. Fists clenched determinedly in the duvet, you stare at the ceiling, waiting for—you don’t know what you’re waiting for. The doorknob to jiggle, for sounds of destruction to arise from downstairs, the sound of his voice, for sleep—for anything.

And then, finally, you sleep.

🎤

This isn’t Steve’s house.

Bucky stares up at the unfamiliar ceiling, counting the minutes until the memories begin to trickle back into his skull. He remembers scoring—easier now than it ever was, considering. Every bar-back knows a guy who knows a guy who can get him what he wants, all he has to do is ask.

And boy did he fucking ask.

He remembers the disembodied rolling bliss, remembers you, your disappointed face. Bucky groans, sitting up. The blanket falls to his lap, and he furrows his brows, picking up the edge. He knows what Kitty will say when he comes to meeting today. It’s a small town and word travels fast. Bucky knows he wasn’t exactly discreet. He’s used to it by now, the well of disgust and shame that begins to grow in his stomach the more he recalls.

It was inevitable, the demon whispers, and Bucky wonders fearfully if it’s right.

I shouldn’t have come here, he thinks to himself as he looks around. His head is still cottony with the pill-hangover, but he knows enough to know he’s an invader here. Why did he even come? The pitiful confrontation he’d forced had gone nowhere, ending with him passed out on your sofa. Bucky rubs his temples.

The whole house smells like caramel apple, your favorite candle. Bucky doesn’t know why he still knows that, but he does. It’s neat enough, but there are signs of life everywhere. Iris’ toys, your books. And in the corner, your guitar. It’s well taken care of, the used Sweetwater you’d managed to get your hands on. He remembered the day you’d found it, rescuing it from the attic of Kevin Harris’ grandmother’s place after she passed.

“Good, you’re up.” Your clipped voice sounds from the doorway. He looks up to see you, still in the oversized shirt you used for pajamas and leaned against the wall. You look tired, and Bucky knows it’s his fault. “How are you feeling?”

He laughs dryly. “Like an asshole.” He’s a wrecking ball. “Is, um. Is Iris…?”

“She’s fine,” you say, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear before you fold your arms across your chest. “She didn’t see you.” He’s thankful for that, at least. “I called Steve. He’s on his way.”

Bucky grimaces. He doesn’t want to see Steve, not after—

“Why did you tell Steve and not me?” He blurts,. “Why did you tell him about Iris?”

“He guessed,” you say defensively. “And even if I had, that’s my business. You made your choices very clear, Bucky.” You glare at him from across the room. He doesn’t know what to say to that—you’re right.

“She’s my daughter.”

“Bucky. I couldn’t—last night? I… How could I let you meet her like that?”

The shame burns in his throat and he swallows tightly against it.

“I know. But I—” The sound of someone at the door makes the both of you jump.

“I’ll be right back,” you say, and disappear down the hall. Bucky stands, folding the blanket you’d given him and placing it neatly on the couch cushions. He hears your footsteps recede, and then the sound of the door lock unlatching. Your voice floats down the hall, quiet but audible.

“Oh—Andy.”

And then a distinctly male voice. “I wanted to stop by, maybe help with drop-off today? I figured we could get breakfast together after.”

“I, um. You know what, Andy? Now is just really not a good time—”

“Is that your bat? Did something happen last night?” He sounds concerned. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes, yes everything’s fine, no—wait, Andy I said it’s not a good time—”

Bucky backs away from the archway just as Andy rounds the corner. His shocked face contorts with anger as he whips his head around.

“What the hell is he doing here?”

Bucky feels hot anger flare in his chest as he crosses his arms. “Could ask the same of you.” Andy takes a step forward before you grab his arm.

“Would the two of you just fucking stop? Andy I said it’s not a good goddamn time!” Bucky watches you run a frustrated hand through your hair, tugging on it before letting go. He shouldn’t feel so territorial—you aren’t his. That doesn’t stop the sneer from curling his lip as he watches the other man reluctantly stand down.

“What is he doing here?” Andy asks again, and you purse your lips.

“Andrew Barber this is my house. I do not have to explain myself to you.” Andy looks positively murderous at that, but says nothing, crossing his arms as he levels a hard look at Bucky. “He crashed on my couch last night. Happy?”

“No.” Andy replies without taking his eyes off of Bucky. “You should have called me.” There’s a possessiveness in his tone that makes Bucky’s hackles rise. He’s the one with history, it’s Andy who’s the newcomer. What right does he have, to look at Bucky like the interloper? He doesn’t like the way Andy positions himself between you, a hand on the curve of your hip over the t-shirt. It’s familiar in a way that makes Bucky want to bare his teeth in warning.

You let her go, the demon reminds him. You threw her away like trash. He is pleased, though, to see you shove Andy’s hand away as you place your hands on your hips stubbornly.

“I’m an adult, Andy, and I handled it.” You say, your hard glare daring him to challenge you. He doesn’t. “Besides. Bucky was just leaving.” You say it pointedly around Andy’s broad shoulders.

Bucky doesn’t want to leave now, especially not now that Andy is here, but there’s little room for him to argue, not when he sees Steve pull up in the pickup through the living room window.

“Yeah.” He mutters. “Just leaving.” He shoves his hands into his pockets as he heads for the door. You walk him out onto the porch, your arms still crossed over your chest. He looks past you to Andy, who smiles at him smugly.

“Try not to miss your meeting,” he says, and you whip your head around to glare at him, before closing the door behind you.

“Look, ignore Andy. He’s just—”

“An asshole?” Bucky scoffs. “I didn’t think that was your type.” You scowl at him.

“Well, if he’s an asshole then I’m two for two, so it’s definitely my type.” You retort sharply. “Bucky, look. Last night—”

“I fucked up,” he says quickly. He doesn’t want to hear you say it. He doesn’t know why, but for some reason he knows that hearing you tell him he fucking relapsed again would make him hurt worse than the fucking DT’s. “I know I fucked up.”

“You did,” you say, and he winces. That stings, too. Maybe worse. “You had three weeks, Buck. Why’d you throw that away?”

His lip curls. “Finding out you have a kid six years into their life isn’t really awesome news.” He snaps back. “You, Steve, you both lied to me.” He can’t help the accusatory pitch his tone takes. He knows you take note of it too, your eyes narrowing to angry slits.

“Oh bull-fucking-shit, Bucky,” you say, tossing your hands up. “Call after call after call, none of my fucking letters answered.” You shake your head at him. “What was I supposed to do? You shut me out! I wasn’t going to fucking chase you forever!”

“What?” Bucky steps back, reeling. “What are you talking about? I never got one fucking call—”

“I am not doing this with you.” You say, pinching the bridge of your nose as you turn back towards the front door. “I am not going to fucking stand here and argue with you about what I know I did. You don’t get to show up high at my fucking house and demand to be treated like you would have been father of the year if you’d known.”

“Maybe I fucking would have!” He spits, the old venom welling up temptingly under his tongue. He regrets the words before they’re even fully out of his mouth. “If you hadn’t tried to trap me—”

The slap echoes in his ears before he feels the sting of it, raising his own hand to his face where you had hit him.

“Get the fuck out of here.” You spit through gritted teeth. Your eyes are wet with unshed tears, and the angry shame in Bucky’s chest grows until angry tears are pricking at his eyes too. It isn’t for you, his anger. No, it’s for himself—because there’s no one Bucky hates more than the man he sees reflected in your glassy eyes.

“Don’t fucking come back until you’re sober, you understand me?” You shove a finger into his chest. “I would rather tell her you’re dead than let her see you like this.”

You don’t wait for him to answer, instead you yank open the door and shut it in his face, barricading him on the other side. He’s tempted to bang on the door, to kick and punch at it until you’re forced to come back out again because this isn’t fucking over, dammit—

But he doesn’t.

Bucky searches for the half empty carton of cigarettes in his jacket pocket, sticking one between his lips as he gets unceremoniously into the passenger seat of Steve’s pickup.

“Rough night?” He asks as Bucky straps himself in, and grabs for the lighter in the cupholder. He doesn’t answer right away, lighting the cigarette and exhaling a few clouds of acrid smoke as Steve pulls out into traffic.

“Yeah,” he says, tapping the ash out of the open window. He watches the row of brick and mortar houses fade into the distance in the rearview mirror. “Rough.”

🎤

“Iron Man at your service, this is Tony.” Tina had been rather reluctant to patch Bucky through to Tony’s personal line, but after a few choice words—some of them threats—she had done so.

“Tony.”

“Bucky! How are you? How’s it going in Milton?”

“Meridian.”

“Whatever.”

“Fine,” he says, choosing purposefully not to mention his bender just the night before. “Listen, did you uh. Ever get any letters, phone calls, or anything from anybody back home in Meridian?”

“Bucky you get so much fucking fan-mail we could fill an olympic swimming pool with it—not now, baby, I’m on the phone,” he hears Tony stage whisper to someone who giggles. “You’re going to have to be more specific.”

“When I first signed up. They’d be old.”

“Probably? I mean nothing of note. You know we sort through the mail and give you the important stuff. Anything from your personal contacts, you would have seen. Look is there a point to this? Because I’ve got to tell you, I’ve got some pressing business to attend to, if you catch my meaning.”

Bucky rolls his eyes. Tony has never thought twice about sampling from the buffet of groupies that seemed to tail Valkyrie’s Revenge like lost puppies.

“I need to know if I got letters about a kid, Tony.”

“What?”

“A fucking kid Tony. I need to know if we were contacted—”

“I told you,” he says quickly, his tone dismissive. “If they got sent, you’d have seen ‘em, kid. Why? Somebody springing a paternity suit on us?” He hears Tony hush more people, excusing himself quietly. The background noise coming through the receiver seems to fade until there’s only quiet breathing on the other end.

“No. I mean—I don’t know. I just…” He pauses. You’d seemed so certain, so sure of yourself when you claimed you’d tried to contact him. Call after call… all my letters unanswered. “I want to know.”

“Well I can’t help you, pal,” Tony replies. “We’d have told you if we got them.”

“Yeah. Sure.” Bucky swallows against the lump in his throat.

“Keep me posted. This is why we have lawyers.”

Bucky hangs up without another word, frustratedly tossing his phone to the bed. He’d refused to speak to Steve when he asked him where he went, why he’d been gone all night. It was easy enough to deflect with an argument, a skill Bucky had learned the very first time his bandmates had tried to take him to task for his behavior. No one wants a screaming match at ten in the morning.

He can’t deflect himself, though, can’t stop the thoughts going round and round in his skull like a carousel. Someone had lied to him, someone had kept Iris from him.

And if not you, then who?

Steve’s quiet knock on his door makes Bucky’s head snap up, his eyes narrowing as his friend steps across the threshold. He’s still angry, and Steve knows it, holding his hands up placatingly.

“Look. I know you don’t want to talk to me right now. But I’m heading out, and I think you should come with me.”

Bucky eyes him suspiciously. “If you’re trying to drop me off at a facility this is a shitty fucking way to start.” Steve shakes his head.

“Not a facility.”

“Then where?”

“You’ll see.” Bucky watches his friend’s face for a tell—Steve always was a terrible liar. There doesn’t seem to be one though, not that Bucky can see. He gets up slowly, and follows Steve back down the stairs and out the front door. Steve gets into the driver’s seat, and waits patiently for Bucky to catch up before the truck engine roars to life. Bucky is glad that Steve doesn’t force conversation, doesn’t try to fill the silence with meaningless platitudes as he drives.

He doesn’t turn toward Meridian, instead taking the dirt road north of town, away from the meager downtown strip and up into the hills. It’s a gloomy day, overcast and gray, with the occasional drop of rain splattering against the windshield. The back-roads are both familiar and strange to him now, it’s been so long since he’s driven them.

Bucky remembers that—driving full speed around the treacherous corners with you standing up through the sunroof, your arms outstretched like you were trying to touch the sky. He’d believed you could then, in those moments, that your fingertips could touch the deep unending blue.

That blue is gone, though, as are the people you were—Bucky doesn’t know you anymore.

He’s surprised, when Steve pulls up to the old graveyard and doesn’t pass by, slowing to a stop outside the gates.

“What are you doing?” Bucky asks, panic gnawing at the edges of his thoughts. “Steve—”

“How long’s it been, Buck? Five years? Six?”

“Fuck you,” Bucky snarls, lunging forward to try and grab the keys from Steve himself. “I don’t want—”

“For once, Buck, I could not give a shit less about what you want.” Steve stuffs the keys into his pocket and gets out of the car. “Come on.” He doesn’t wait for Bucky, pulling open one of the wrought iron gates with both hands. It opens with a rough squeal. Bucky reluctantly unbuckles himself, sticking a nervous cigarette between his lips as he follows him down the muddy path. His hands are trembling and unsure as he lifts the lighter, but his feet know the way without his direction.

The graves are right next to each other, just like they are in Bucky’s nightmares. The grass is green over the top of them, different from the loose dirt that had been shoveled on top just before Bucky had lit out of Meridian.

Should have been me.

“Why did you bring me here?” Bucky asks, his throat tight with tears he doesn’t want to shed. The cigarette burns at his lips, and he flicks the remains of it into the damp grass behind him.

“It’s the one place you’ve been avoiding. You promised you would come back.”

Bucky flinches.

It’s the first promise he ever broke, the one he’d made as he tossed in his handful of dirt like the preacher told him to. They’re in a better place, he’d said, patting Bucky sadly on the shoulder. A better place. Bucky was too old then to believe the lie—there was no better place. Just cold, wet earth and worms and nothing. He wonders if the demon was born that day, coming up out of the dirt while his mother and sister were lowered into it, because he’d known he was lying, even as he spoke the soft words to Becca’s tombstone—

He would never come back.

But here you are, his self loathing whispers. Even a broken clock is right twice a day.

“It should have been me,” he says softly, stepping forward to rest his palm against the cold stone. “We all know it should have been me.”

“I don’t think Becca would agree with you.”

“Well it doesn’t matter what you think,” Bucky snarls over his shoulder. “She’s dead.” Steve runs a frustrated hand through his hair.

“Yeah, Buck. She’s dead. She’s dead because Fred Ackerson’s truck jumped the guardrail.” Bucky doesn’t know why hearing that from Steve enrages him, makes him want to pummel his best friend’s face into pulp right there in the dirt next to his sister.

“You don’t understand,” he says through gritted teeth, his hand a tight fist on the tombstone. “If I had—” Steve grabs his shoulders, shaking him.

“What? What would you have done? She died on impact.” There are tears in his eyes too. “How long are you going to punish yourself for this shit, Buck?”

“I deserve—”

“Iris is six.” Steve’s words cut through him like a blade. “Do you want to see her make it to seven? Eight? Or do you want to be down there in the dirt?” He asks, his voice hard. “Because you won’t. Fuck, Bucky, you keep this shit up, I don’t think you’re going to see Christmas.”

“Maybe I shouldn’t.”

“Yeah, well, that’s up to you, isn’t it?” Steve says, releasing him. “It’s always been up to you.” He casts a forlorn look at Becca’s tombstone over Bucky’s shoulder, before he shakes his head. “Say… whatever you need to say. I’ll be waiting for you in the truck.” The silence closes in around him like fog, so loud that Bucky’s ears ring with it as he stares at the graves. He’d never said anything at the funerals, his tight lipped silence as loud as any of the moving eulogies given by those that had known them.

Bucky clears his throat. “Hey, Beccs.” He says in a hoarse, quiet voice. “B-been a while, huh?” The ground is muddy, but he sits down on it anyway, on the strip of grass between his mother and sister. “I, um. I don’t know what to say. That’s why I never said anything, it all seemed… stupid, I guess. Because you can’t hear me where you are, so… what does it matter, right?”

He’s tempted to give up and go back to the car, but Bucky swallows down the bitter urge, and keeps trying.

“But… if you could hear me, Beccs, I’m—I’m fuckin’ sorry.” His voice cracks. It feels like glass in his veins to say it, to finally admit it out loud to the air. “I am so fuckin’ sorry.” He hates to think about that night, about pulling mom and Beccs out of the twisted burning metal. The only way he can is with the pills, but there aren’t any this time; nothing to stop him from having to sit with his pain.

And for the first time in a long time, Bucky does. He welcomes it back like an old friend—and for once, the demon is silent.

“I’m sorry I didn’t turn fast enough, didn’t see him coming,” he mumbles through steady tears. “I’d give anything for it to be me in there, not you.” The tears won’t stop now that they’ve started. “Y-you were going to be fucking—I dunno. A fucking astrophysicist, or something, Beccs. A goddamn force, and I, fuck. I don’t know what to be without you, sis. I… I don’t even want to be.” He admits the last part softly, to himself. He hasn’t thought it, really, not beyond wishing he could trade places with her.

If he was honest, Bucky wanted to die. That was the truth of it. That was why he didn’t bother to save money, why he did every drug he could until he was blacking out. He wanted oblivion—like mom. Like Becca.

That’s not what Beccs would want. The voice is softer, not acid like the one that usually follows every conscious thought.

She would want you to live.

Bucky isn’t sure how long he sits there in the cold drizzle before he gets up, wiping at his face. His hair is slick from the rain, and he shakes the droplets off of his coat before he gets into the passenger seat of Steve’s truck. He’s waiting—just like he said he was.

He starts it wordlessly, and they’re halfway back to Meridian when he asks him.

“Did you say what you needed to say, Buck?” Bucky follows the path of a particularly fat drop of rain down the window with his finger until it passes from view.

“Yeah. I think so.”

next chapter

Thank you for reading! Please check out my masterlist for other, similar works, and follow my library blog, @box-of-bones-library for updates. ❤️

#sebastia stan fanfiction #sebastian stan characters #bucky barnes #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barmes angst #bucky barnes smut #slow burn #bucky fanfic #boxofbonesfic #angst

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xiaojuun · 4 months

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every month of 2023! tagged by my beloveds @ambivartence @euijin @miyawaki thank you 💖

rules: link your favorite and/or most popular post from each month this year <3 (it’s totally fine to skip months!) and tag some CCs you love!

whew! uhhh it's been a crazy year. i graduated nursing school, got my professional license, moved across the country, started my dream job, and ... well, i also got my nctzenship which was the plot twist of the century for everyone including myself. i feel like i haven't been as creatively driven this year, but giffing has been a really comforting hobby even when i haven't been churning out my most interesting ideas. thanks for joining me for another year of falling in love with new groups and rotting on this hellsite ! without further ado, here are my favorite and most popular posts from every month:

JANUARY favorite: minisong 'fighting but we're holding hands' compilation | most popular: ending fairy soobin

FEBRUARY favorite: cravity 'the eve' gfx | most popular: swan 'sweet juice' stage set

MARCH favorite: wonjin birthday set | most popular: ive 'kitsch' teaser

APRIL favorite AND most popular: THAT minisong tiktok

MAY (graduated!) favorite: barbie dayoung + kissvity comp | most popular: sakura 'unforgiven' stage set

JUNE (passed the boards!) favorite: jihoon in 'move' + midyear favorite albums | most popular: yena in 'hate rodrigo'

JULY favorite: swan 'twenty' mv set | most popular: swan 'twenty' ending fairy

AUGUST favorite: jo yuri 'taxi' play color | most popular: ending fairy lia

SEPTEMBER (moved!) favorite: ive 'either way' mv set + crabitey comp | most popular: taehyun in 'back for more'

OCTOBER (nct takeover + finally made another gfx after so many months) favorite: djj 'perfume' album gfx + kpop halloween zombies comp + ive 'off the record' x 'love dive' parallels | most popular: everybody loves jaehyun

NOVEMBER (started my job!) favorite: 'baby don't stop' gfx + wayvacation xiaojun | most popular: this xiaojun

DECEMBER favorite: tbd because i hope i'll make something else for my favorite title tracks of the year ........ (ambitious with my work schedule) . but for now we'll say xiaojun with puppies ♡ | most popular: xiaodery professionalism

tagging: @berryjaellie @dongkwan @hongberries @ninqz @lunetual @gnanii @dreamaze @merrybaekmas @yeonbins @sunghanbin @possession1981 @souladies @neonsbian @honeydewtual @yeofi @woodziecup @ashisland and anyone else who wants to <3

#greetings loved ones .#eseries:2023faves!

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anatrik · 12 days

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First thoughts TTPD:

What a lana x folklore girlie win this issss!

1.Fortnight is about matty?? HAHAHAHA also why did this make me think of when holt was going running with the ladies when he was in witness protection??? Crying. Fav line has to be they were supposed to take me away but they forgot to come and get me. So sad but also so cool in relation to her cancellation/return. 10/10

2. TTPD- not so hahahaha anymore IS THIS ACTUALLY A FUCKING MATTY HEALY ALBUM??? There was a typewriter at the 1975 show she performed anti-hero at? Unless its somehow about harry? Who else is tattooed on her roster??? Or is this about herself? Kinda feel like modern idiots/who’s going to decode is directed at us lol😂 9/10?

3.My boy only breaks his favourite toys- went in expecting mad woman rage. Pleasantly surprised. king of my heart to queen of sandcastles he destroys….DESTROYED ME. Are you fucking kidding me rn? Im caling it. Best song. Im crying at 7.30 am this is not funny anymore. Also THANK YOU FOR NOT SLANDERING DAD. I knew you wouldnt let us down like that. Also the chorus sounds like long story short😭 oh this is so sad. Once i fix me hes going to miss me? He was my best friend?😭 he runs because he loves me? Stopp😭😭 1000000/10

4.Down bad- ….aaaand we’re back to MATTY AGAIN? He does not deserve this spotlight but why are all the song so goood😭😭😭 is this why artists love to date problematic men? It unlocks some extraordinary potential? Crazy crazy girl😭 also stay down (bad) 🤌🏾 shes done it again 10/10 also for personal reasons i will be believing this is about joe in that Tom/Joe/met gala overlap period when she was photographed going to the gym a lot and that this is about all that yearning please let it be about that plesplesplesplesplesples also down bad waking up in blood staring at the sky…like i lost a twin is giving bigger than the whole sky🥺

5. So long, london- so so long long, lon-don DONE? ok miss girl😭 the hoax parallels😭 dont be undoing the song i was going to play at my weddddding what is wrong with you😭 my only one my smoking gun to two graves one gun youll find someone??? Also reminds me of la la land :/ how much sad did you think I had in me? You wrote hoax so a lot ok leave us alone. crying again. 10000000000000000/10 oh lol its a track 5 ofc it is😂

6. But daddy I love him- she really said if you ever liked, shared or even LOOKED at the ‘vivaa las vegas’ memes you cant come to the wedding and shes so real for it. Lfgggg. Ubothered unhinged uhmazing. Growing up precocious sometimes means you still hold on to that princess/quarterback wattpad fantasy AS IS YOUR RIGHT QUEEN GO THE FUCK OFF🥳 100000/10 calling out toxic fandom for the first time and we love to see it🫡 this is suchhhh a happy songggg you deserve ALL the chaos and revelry.

7. Fresh out the slammer- god she gets it. Like sure he was great and he is still my biological father and everything but as a decidedly melancholy person myself who has constantly had atleast one close friend in a deep depression I can see how all that heavy lifting can just get heavy at some point especially when youre a partner and their sole lighthouse in wtv storms be out there buffeting their mental health. Its not for everyone and thats so fair and so valid but so sad as well. 10/10 for the honesty.

8. Florida- she really said girlrot summer🫡 this is the lanaest song ever. So lucky one/nothing new coded. This will be the First song I repeat and then so long london. Aaaghhh how i love a self aware melancholic anxious little superstar. 90283749292/10 thank you for giving florence an entire verse whew. Little did you know your home’s really only a town you’re just a guest in is soooo going on my body forever

9. Guilty as sin?- honestly just fuck if it means we dont have to hear about how desirable ratty healy is man ffs. IThe only reason he looks so hot is bc hes forbidden. You have to trust me on this. He’s sooo mid JESUS. U cant be writing hozier lyrics about a man that hasn’t met a shower😭 1000000/10 writing. -16392992/10 content. Unrequited love/lust truly is the greatest weapon in a poets arsenal bc where is this energy in the joe songs binch?😭 this is such a teen in love with a 26 yo creep who called me so mature for my age mom you just dont get ittt anthem😂😂

10. Who’s afraid of little old me?- is a warning 😂 im so here for it. Like yes I still hate matty with all my heart and soul but yes I agree fans should not be allowed so much of an opinion on another persons life and yes I should be afraid (I am). She said aight love letter era over I AM WRITING YOU ALL HATE MAIL AND I’M HAND DELIVERING IT. Shes sooo done pretending to be the relatable girl next door when she’s anything but and is now reminding us of it and yes yes yessss girl OWN ITTTTTTTT. I’ve been saying for agesssss that there is a darkness under all that sunshine from where she clawed her way to the top and this is sooo vindicating. 10000000000000/10 favourite song ever. Mad woman wishes she was who’s afraid of little old me. I am unwell. I am in love. This is the Taylor Swift i stan. The marketing genius the calculating business woman the puppet master with narcotics in her songs thats why we sing along🫡 she so can handle a dangerous man

11. I can fix him (no really I can)- you cant.

12. loml- ofc. OFC. Its the saddest song of all time. OFC. Fuck offf ughhhh. 😭😭😭😭😭 its giving happiness. Its giving divorce. i am a child of a broken home now and my parents still love each other and hold so much regret still. What do i do with thissss? Im just a little girl taylorrr! 1002380292011010101/10 soo so gooood.

13. I can do it with a broken heart- first of all track 13. Love it. Second of all the upbeat barbieness of it all. Third of all I FINALLY PLACED IT. Shes in her unrelatable era. She is not your girl next door. You will never understand her life. She is as much a phenomenon as a person and we literally only see as much as she allows us to and honestly if i have to get put in my place theres noooo better way to have it done. Im having such a great time actually. 10 BILLION TRILLION OUT OF 10 you tellll em girl you FUCKING TELL EM.

14. Smallest man who ever lived- not going to speculate on who it is bc they clearly had a serious problem and its not a joke but damn :/ thats so sad :/ hope they get help? Didnt expect this to be what the song was about at all?

15. The alchemy- she said TRAVIS IS MY BOY WITH HER WHOLE CHEST😌 10/10

16. Clara bow- did she just name drop herself ? I was so right about unrelatable era. Also the Subtle nod to olivia/sabrina noted and appreciated. Lucky one/castles crumbling (mature version) fr fr. Solid legacy song.

17. The black dog- shared your secrets with and location is the same whiplash as a red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground with no one around to tweet it🤌🏾 joe songs hit so so different 😭😭😭 1000000000/10

18. imgonnagetyouback- the valiant roar was not so valiant and more of a mew i guess. 7/10

19. The albatross- oh this is the ONE. The album defining song for sureeee. Mad woman on coke. A rose by any other name is a scandal???? Thats my religion right there. Little last great American dynasty twist there at the end! Fuck yea. She does reallly try to warn the men in her life have to give her that. One gazillion/10

20. Clearly god has favourites and they are the ppl called chloe or sam or sophia or marcus😭 ALSO this song is about joe for sure. The internet starlet hasss to be delaney rowe!!!! It HAS TO BE. 10/10

21. How did it end?- shes back for the fans😂 plot twist the breakup is with yall🤌🏾 but yesss say it louder! One gasp and then how did it end. So good. 100/10

22. So high school- lmao aristotle grand theft auto ONLYY taylor swift man😭😂 you know what you want and boy you got her🫡🫡 11/10

23. I hate it here- mother’s having a mental breakdown kids yk the drill🤌🏾 10/10

24. ThanK you aIMiee- what better way to say fuck you to a hater than to thank her for jumpstarting your legacy my god!!! She is insane for this. The capitalisation is a bit petty tho ngl. 8/10

25. I look in peoples windows- once again I thank you for the kindness and respect shown to joe. Never doubted you but thank you nevertheless. 10/10 short as nice to have a friend but it didnt need to be longer.

26. The prophecy- its so sad and humbling to see even a woman at where she is having to beg for love bc that literally is the nature of love. Something humiliating, to have to beg for 🤷‍♀️ cards playing out like fools in a fable cursed like eve got bitten. No one writes like her damn. 10/10

27. Cassandra- very madeline miller on this one. Love love loveee modern takes on tragic greek women. 100/10

28. Peter- ah fuck. This one is going to hurt (it did). 1000000/10 my ribs get the feeling she did😭 all her joe related aches are so bone deeeep ugh. Promises oceans deep but never to keep😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 oh god it hurtsss it hurts it hurtss

29. The bolter- curious child ever reviled except by her father wow.

30. Robin- OMG! I needed this song growing up sooo bad. That way to go tiger felt so so warm like running into a kitchen after a day of being in the mud and u tell ur mum the silly things u did and shes genuinely interested and impressed by your smol victories. A bajillion/10

31. The manuscript- postmortem of every ex ever🤌🏾 love it.

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mrntta · 2 months

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When are mfs going to realize that literally these three are horrible people? I keep seeing comments on the og comic where they are trying to put the blame on one single person as if the three of them didn't make decitions that quite literally fucked everyone else.

On Undyne's part, the responsibility of being a queen was clearly way too out of her control, while YES, she wanted the best for everyone else, let's remember when Sans offered his plan of dismantling and re-fixing the CORE, and instead of trying to think coldly, she instantly went ax-crazy and tried to forcefully take his eye, showing that, while she was desperate, she has no control over her emotions, but unlike Sans, I actually feel bad for her since like I said, there were monster DUSTING FROM STARVATION, so of course she desperatly wanted to find a solution as soon as possible, although, she is now a full blown tyranical dictator by what she seems like in the future.

Alphys is probably the LEAST bad of them, as just like Undyne, she desperatly wanted to find a solution to fix the CORE, was choosing Sans eye as a solution in a "maybe" scenario was a good choice? certainly not, but fuck man, she had the entire weight of "saving the Underground" on her shoulders (plus her relationship with Undyne starting to crumble) and honestly, out of the three, she had the worst fate, wich honestly seems WAAAAYY too far for what she did.

Sans...whew, I love him, but he's undeniably a piece of shit, ESPECIALLY after the CORE incident. Wanting revenge for getting his eye forcefully ripped off is SLIGHTLY understandable, but lobotomizing Alphys, destroying the CORE, lying to people on Snowdin that Undyne ordered to eat the fallen humans, and manipulating his brother into eating human flesh without Papyru's knowledge were certainly a choice, and the worst is that he did all of that out of pure spite, like, damn, was dooming the entire underground worth it Sans? by the looks of it, it seems like it wasn't, and frankly, it feels bizarre whenever I see people trying to defend him or making atwork of him as a stupid dog who can't think of his own (reminder that he quite literally manipulated everyone in Snowdin and Papyrus into eating human flesh, there's a reason he never ate anything during 8 years, he is NOT dumb).

So basically, Undyne is a tyranical Queen, Sans is a control freak, and Alphys was just...impractical (bc imagine if Sans's eye didn't work out, she would have sacrificed his "friend" for nothing).

Anyway, sorry for the sudden rant lol, but I wanted to express myself out since I keep seeing people justifying one of them (Especially Sans) as if only one was guilty and the other two were innocent.

#horrortale #undertale au #rant post

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bookishtheaterlover7 · 2 months

Note

I’m going to counter your anon who says AB isn’t getting karma.

I think she is. A Little bit already.

First, her “husband’s” fanbase despises her. Not all, but I’d say a loud minority that’s also out there ready to snatch her wig for anything she tries to do (lol).

Anytime she does something remotely embarrassing there’s a group of people waiting to out her - remember Liberia? 😂 and they have receipts and keep screenshots. She can’t hide unless she goes private but then she’ll never get more followers. 🤣

And if she thinks these people will stop if she has his baby? She can think again. That’s never happening. I think she burned all opportunity to make peace with his fan base and people want to see her gone. There are a ton of crazy fans that go way too far, yes, but unfortunately shes made enemies for life. Should have thought twice before having your soulmate mock and troll your fans on your behalf and then posting yourself showering to the world as an FU. Now when you try to claim you’re so shy your posts will be spammed with your own nudes.

The general public still does not notice or care about her. She’s so uninteresting and irrelevant her name is still getting spelled wrong. By people in her own country 🙈

Her movie backed by the largest US talent agency made no noise at all in any of the box offices and especially not in the United States of America. She was only only in it briefly and the reviews don’t even mention her. Not really going to help her future IT girl case because in comparison, like Jenna Ortega gained 10 million fans in like two weeks. I’m sure a bunch of them were bots too but let me tell you EVERYOne was watching Wednesday back in Nov-Dec 22. So her gaining that much really isn’t that far off the bat. Not to mention, AB’s big moment to shine was around the same time as Jenna and Jenna beat her and didn’t have to date anyone famous. 🙊

Even Chris back in 2019 - his peak popularity and then 2020 - he was trending at times daily, weekly. He was trending #1 on twitter for at least 24-48 hours during his oopsie weekend. His tweet after that telling people to go vote got millions of likes. He used to get crazy engagement just for breathing. I remember after endgame and then knives out people were talking about him like he had just popped up on the scene…this man had been in the industry at least 20 where at that point. lol

Chris came on IG and I’m pretty sure he gained a million followers in about 24 hours. Yes, there are celebs that did it faster than him but remember he’s always been more of an under the radar celebrity and he never really tried to be otherwise. So for the fact he was hitting 40 years old and joined IG ten years after everyone else and got 1 million the first day is impressive. So yes, he had star power. Jenna has it now.

And yes, CE has lost that star power and in part it’s due to him being with AB. So yes, he’s losing due to his decision to be linked with her, which could be called his karma…

But miss wannabe IT girl? Whew.

Try as she might, Her followers….basically capped at 840K and I will bet Elon musk’s entire net worth she was hoping to hit 1 million the night she went public with her now husband. People on tumblr even saw that she went and pinned her Mrs Harris movie post like the same day their pap pics came out. That’s how you know old girl was waiting and hoping to see her numbers go up.

Lastly, her “husband” is still more popular than her. Even though his fanbase has deteriorated she hasn’t gained more popularity’s I think this may really really grate her (don’t ask me why, I just have this feeling) because she’s the young and vibrant one. She wants to be adored and no matter what she tries to do, photoshopping herself in every picture she posts, she’s not outgaining him in terms of recognition. People will only know her if his name is added first.

So…yeah. Maybe you think she has it all and she’s not getting anything bad. But I would say karma works in mysterious ways. Sometimes it’s not as obvious as you think.

OH! THANK YOU, AN🫶N!!!

God, this really made me feel so much better after reading all the shit Elijah posted on Medium. 🥹

Especially when you mentioned "Karma isn't as obvious as you think". It's something I made a realization recently. Because I truly believe in Karma, I just wanted Karma to be more obvious, but sometimes, it just isn't.

And honestly, that makes it better 😆

Anyway, back to what you said about Albitch's Karma... Ohhhh, the number of laughs you gave me is PRICELESS!!!

I would seriously pay to see the screenshots of HER posts being filled with her own nudes 😆 Reap what you sow!

And I know it will not get any better for her. She's dragging Chris through the mud, and let's just say, that the fans that love Chris, definitely hate her. Beyond her "marrying" him.

Also, how Chris seems to contradict everything he used to say whenever he's with her. Hell, she doesn't even have THE ASS that Chris would be into 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 so, that's a VERY BIG contradiction. And, regards to their marriage... PRIVACY, MY ASS!!!

That said, I love how clearly you can see everything, once you get a level head. That means... Karma is definitely real.

Also, lemme just tag @blue-ice715 because it's her post that I reblogged, and she would definitely love to read this. 😊

#An🫶n asks #booky reacts #booky answers #An Ask for blue-715 #chris evans #chris evans fandom #Yeah. I love this Ask so much!#Team Chris #❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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futureslaps · 1 year

Text

The Captive - Chapter 8

Chapter 7 Chapter 9

Whew, finally done! Get ready for some feels!

Enjoy💙

Spider tried to sleep, but every time he closed his eyes, he could only hear Kiri’s broken voice as he walked, no, ran away from her.

He used to be able to talk to Kiri about anything.

Out of all the Sullys, he had always been closest to Kiri. Maybe it was the fact that they were both orphans, the fact that were both different from everyone else, or even their shared sky-person origin, but Spider always felt like he had a special connection to her.

She had been the only one who was always happy to see Spider. She had always been the one to play with him when they were kids and had always been the one to explore the jungle with him as adults. As Neteyam and Lo’ak had grown older, they’d slowly grown apart from Spider. But he and Kiri had been as close as ever. She’d always been there for him when he was hurting.

But when Spider saw the hurt in her own eyes today, he’d run away.

He couldn’t bear to see her upset because of him. He knew it was because she cared about him, and that made it hurt even more. He didn’t deserve her concern after everything he’d done. He should have told her the truth, but he hadn’t.

So now, he was a traitor, and a coward.

He tried again to close his eyes and go to sleep, but his head felt like it was about to burst. His brain was a whirlwind of emotions.

It was no use.

He slowly got up from his sleeping nook, already sore from the uncomfortable position. It was still pretty early in the night, so he decided to take a walk. There was no point in lying there wide awake.

He quietly made his way down to one of the beaches, careful not to wake anyone. It was quiet, peaceful. Spider took a moment to breath in the air, before continuing.

He tried to sort the feelings in his head, but whenever he thought about them, they threatened to overwhelm him. Jake, Kiri, Quaritch, it was all just too much. Spider almost wished he could disappear. That a wave would come in and sweep him out to sea. Away from everything.

As he stepped across the dark sand, he tried to think of something he could do to clear his mind. Talking to any of the Sullys was out of the question. The Metkayina already didn’t trust him. His mind drifted back to the same person. As always there was only…

His eyes scanned along the coast until he spotted Quaritch’s hut.

After the past day, his last meeting with Quaritch felt like ages ago. He desperately wanted to see him again. Quaritch was the only person left he didn’t have to lie to. The only person Spider could tell anything. And in less than ten days he would be gone forever.

Spider left the sand and slowly crept closer to the hut. He could see the structure much clearer now that it wasn’t pouring rain. The guards were sitting on a nearby rock. They were still vigilant, but at this hour of the night, after a long day on duty, they were visibly exhausted. Spider weighed his chances. It was risky. Far riskier than before. He had to actually be stealthy this time. And if the guards heard him…

9 days.

Spider considered it for a moment longer. It would be better to wait for another storm. But who knew if there would even be another storm?

9 days

To hell with it.

He crept up to the hut, using the stalking technique he’d learned with the Omatikaya. He crept along the side, finding the same gap as before. This time, he slid under it without hesitation.

Compared to the night before, it was eerily quiet in the hut. The thick canvas muffled even the sound of the ocean to a barely audible rumble. It was lighter, too. This time, Spider had no issue finding Quaritch. He was sleeping, but as Spider approached, his eyes shot open.

(..)

It took a moment for Quaritch’s eyes to adjust, but when they did, they widened almost immediately.

Spider was back.

“Spider? The hell are you doing here? Are you crazy?” His voice was a whisper, but his tone was still stern.

“I just…I needed to see you again.” Spider whispered back.

Quaritch’s expression softened slightly. The kid sounded like he was about to cry, and he looked like a mess too. But he still shouldn’t be here.

“You can’t keep coming here, kid. Especially not when the weather is clear. I can’t help you if you get caught.”

“I know.” Spider replied, lowering his voice farther. “But I had to talk to you. Please.”

Quaritch sighed. The kid was already here, and they were already talking. He supposed there was no point in trying to convince him to leave now. It’s not like he could anyway…

He moved closer to the bars so they could keep their voices as low as possible.

“What’s going on, kid?”

Spider took a breath, then spoke.

“I’m…struggling. I thought things would start getting better here, but every day I just feel worse. I just feel so…bad all the time. I feel guilty about everything.”

Quaritch listened closely. Helping people with their emotions had never been his strength. One of the reasons he joined the marines was to avoid a job where he had to worry about things like emotions. But he had to try for Spider.

“You’re the only person I can talk to. I can’t tell anyone else how I feel. I can’t tell anyone about…this.”

“This?” Quaritch asked.

“About you, dad.” Spider croaked. “I can’t tell anyone that I care about you. I can’t tell anyone that you were nice” His voice cracked on the last word.

Quaritch’s heart jumped when he heard Spider call him “dad”, but he knew it wasn’t the time to comment on that.

“They’ll think I’m a traitor, that the only reason I’m alive is because I helped you.” Spider hung his head. “I am a traitor, I…”

At this, Quaritch interrupted the boy.

“Spider, look at me.”

Spider looked up. His eyes were now moist with tears.

“Everything you did, you did to survive. I made you show take us to the banshees, I made you teach us Na’vi, I made you come with us on the raids. You knew you’d be taken back to Bridgehead if you didn’t.”

Quaritch put a hand on Spider’s shoulder.

“Don’t you blame yourself for any of that. It’s my fault, you shouldn’t take any of the heat for it.”

But Spider shook his head.

“No, it’s still on me. I should have done more. I could have taught you Na’vi wrong. I could have tried to run; there were times I could have gotten away. I could have lied about how you tame a banshee. But I didn’t.” Spider choked out.

Before Quaritch could reply, he continued.

“I wanted to teach you the ways of the Na’vi. I wanted to make you proud of me. I thought that, maybe if…” Spider couldn’t finish the sentence.

“I chose to do these things, on my own. Just like I chose to visit you. My choices hurt the Sullys. They hurt the people I care about. When you’re gone, I’ll have nobody left…”

Quaritch was tempted to say something callous about the Sullys, but he stopped himself. Now wasn’t the time. He tried as hard as he could to put his choice thoughts about Jake Sully and his family aside for the time. He had to think of something to comfort Spider.

“Look, kid. They still came to rescue you. These people, your… family, they obviously care about you…”

“Neytiri held a knife to my throat.” Spider interrupted. “They’re not my family. And they don’t even know what I’ve done yet. They’ll hate me like they hate you when they do.”

Quaritch closed his eyes, completely lost for words. Things were truly FUBAR for him and Spider. It hurt him in ways he didn’t even think were possible to see how much his son was hurting. He’d hoped that he’d at least be okay since he was back with the Sullys, but things were clearly going the opposite way.

“Stay strong Spider, I’m sure something will come through.” It was a weak attempt at comfort, but it was all he could think to say.

For a while, they just knelt in the dark, Quaritch’s hand still on Spider’s shoulder as he occasionally sniffed.

“Can I stay here?” Spider broke the silence.

“What?”

“I can’t sleep.” Spider spoke softly. “Can I stay here, just for a little bit?”

Quaritch forced a small smile.

“I’m not the one you should be asking for permission, kid.”

“I’ll leave before sunrise.” Spider said quickly. “Nobody will know. I just want to be next to you.”

Quaritch frowned. He knew it was a bad idea, but Spider looked so fragile he thought the kid might literally shatter if he refused.

“You really don’t have a better place to sleep?” Quaritch asked. It was rhetorical, so his heart sank a little when Spider shook his head.

What the hell?

He decided not to press him on it.

“Alright, kid, I’ll wake you.” Quaritch said comfortingly. One of the small benefits of his arrangement was that he’d come to know the telltale sounds of the nature around him like the back of his hand. He knew exactly which noises signified sunrise.

Spider curled up on the ground in front of the bars, holding onto Quaritch’s hand with his own. Quaritch tried to adjust his own position as Spider’s breath began to slow. He settled on lying flat on his back, with his hand outstretched toward Spider. It wasn’t the best position, but there was no chance he was letting go of Spider now.

(..)

It was very late by the time Kiri was sure everyone in the Marui was asleep. Her parents had talked late into the night, but she’d forced herself to stay awake. She had to do this. She grabbed a handful of blankets and crept out into the night.

There was no way her mom would approve of what she was doing, but she wasn’t going to let things continue. The nights in the Metkayina village could be surprisingly chilly, and she refused to let Spider continue to sleep in the cold.

As she approached the junction of two roots where she knew Spider slept, she paused. He wasn’t there. She had seen him lying there several times, even earlier this night as she walked to her Marui, so she was sure it was the right place. But Spider was nowhere to be found.

Where was Spider so late in the night?

She briefly considered the question with curiosity, but her mind came up blank. She settled on asking him tomorrow. She’d hand him the blankets herself the first time she saw him.

9 days left until the trial. Lots of hurt and comfort still on the way...

Sorry for the longer wait than usual, this took me a good while to write. I had big things planned and had several false starts before I finally got it how I wanted. I hope the wait was worth it, this Quaritch-Spider meeting might be one of my favorite things I’ve written! 💙

P.S: Speaking of false starts, I have a big word doc of things I cut/replaced from the story so far. In the spirit of ATWOW’s digital release, would anyone want to see some deleted scenes/bonus content for this fic once it’s over?

Taglist: @buzzing-honeybee @yesthisismycurrenthyperfixation

#Spider needs some love :(#avatar the way of water #avatar 2 #avatar quaritch #avatar jake #avatar kiri #avatar spider #atwow #miles quaritch #spider socorro #recom quaritch

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