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a-closet-emo · 1 year

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Why Am I Like This?

Written for Phic Phight 2023, for Team Ghost.

Prompt by @duchi-nesten: Don’t get him wrong, Danny did want to eventually tell his parents that he and Valerie are dating. But he wanted to introduce the idea as Danny Fenton dating Valerie Gray. Not as Danny Fenton dating the Red Huntress. How did they mess up so badly?

Word Count: 4042

Summary: “You know how there were rumors a while ago that I had a girlfriend?” he asked, and, Ancients, did his voice have to crack on that last word?

“No need to be so embarrassed, Danny-boy! We already know that you’re dating the Red Huntress!” his dad bellowed.

What.

“Yes,” his mom said curtly, “ we do.”

Danny’s brain was short-circuiting. How was he supposed to explain that he’s dating Valerie Gray, who was definitely not a vigilante ghost hunter, without giving away that he was definitely not a half-ghost vigilante ghost hunter, too?

He got a feeling that Clockwork was laughing at his pain.

Danny set his fork down carefully, grateful that tonight’s dinner wasn’t trying to kill him. He didn’t need that tonight, not when his plans were already going to be so stressful.

“So,” he started, and immediately three pairs of eyes zeroed in on him. His parents were looking at him expectantly, like they’d just been waiting for him to speak up which was… not a good sign, but Jazz was giving him her encouraging-yet-I’ll-be-disappointed-if-you-don’t-do-it look, so he kinda had to follow through now.

“You know how there were rumors a while ago that I had a girlfriend?” he asked, and, Ancients, did his voice have to crack on that last word? His parents were still waiting for him to get to the point.

“Yes, sweetie?” his mom prompted, her violet eyes shining with feigned nonchalance as she picked at her plate. At least she was pretending to be casual; his dad was openly staring at him again. He inwardly cringed, remembering the last time his dad thought he had a girlfriend.

He coughed and started rubbing the back of his neck. “Uh, well,” Why did it have to be so embarrassing to tell your parents about your love life! “There’s this girl, you know. And she’s super kickass and fiery but also determined and loyal and compassionate? Uh, sorry, you already know her–”

Suddenly his dad clapped him on the back with enough force, ghost-enhanced physique or not, to nearly make him faceplant into his mashed potatoes. “No need to be so embarrassed, Danny-boy! We already know that you’re dating the Red Huntress!” his dad bellowed.

What.

“Yes,” his mom said curtly, “we do.”

Danny sent a look Jazz’s way that was more a cry for help than anything else, but she was just as bewildered. Their mom sighed.

“After ghost fights,” she said, “Jack and I still hang around the area just to collect extra samples or run a few numbers while the ectoplasm’s still fresh. But we also see you there, sweetie, talking with the Red Huntress or even riding around with her on her board going who-knows-where.”

Danny’s brain was short-circuiting. He was half tempted to check if dinner had been contaminated with ectoplasm, after all.

The reason he was hanging around with Val after ghost fights was because he had fought alongside her during the fight. And somehow, instead of figuring out his identity, his parents… figured out his love life? Sort of? He wanted to think it was a stroke of good luck, or - more likely - another case of his bad luck to be added to the file. How was he supposed to explain that he’s dating Valerie Gray, who was definitely not a vigilante ghost hunter, without giving away that he was definitely not a half-ghost vigilante ghost hunter, too? He got a feeling that Clockwork was laughing at his pain.

“What?” he says a bit too cheerfully, “No -pfft- come on, I’m not dating some masked ghost hunter! I was just there after ghost fights because, uh…”

His dad guffawed before slapping him on the back again. “You’re a riot, son! Maddie and I once saw you exit a janitor’s closet in your school after a fight with ol’ Red, the both of you looking pretty flustered.” The big man was waggling his eyebrows at Danny.

Danny wanted to phase through his chair and into the floor.

“Of course, we all know that proximity to ghosts and ghost fights is very dangerous,” his mom was all business. “If that girl is putting you at risk, sweetie, we’re going to need to have a very long talk with her. And you’ll need more combat lessons!” she added cheerfully. “I know you’re afraid of the ghosts, but if this relationship is turning your interests toward them, then…!”

And that was when Jazz intervened. “Mom, Dad! You’re embarrassing him, look!” She went on, “This is not the kind of conversation that is conducive to a healthy psyche, especially not when the subject is so touchy among boys his age. I wouldn’t be surprised if he wants to leave the scenario you’ve created.”

He so owed her. “Yep! I’ll be going now, bye.” And if he used a little of his ghostly speed to get out of the dining room and up the stairs faster, no one would know. Except for Clockwork.

Clockwork was definitely laughing at him.

–

Danny started eavesdropping, invisible outside his parents’ door, in time to hear his dad sigh loudly with relief.

“I told you he couldn’t be dating Valerie, Maddie! The girl’s way out of his league!”

Danny had to hold back a scoff. Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence, Dad.

“And the Red Huntress isn’t?” his mom challenged.

Danny pouted. Et tu, Mom? (Aha! A Shakespeare reference. He was so going to actually get higher than a passing grade this semester.) He was so tempted to barge in and loudly declare that he was, in fact, dating both of those girls. That girl. He sighed. There’s the problem.

“Even if she is his age - and so help me if she’s older - we’ve seen them meet up before and after ghost fights!” He could hear his mom’s light footsteps as she paced the length of the room. “What happens when ‘before’ or ‘after’ becomes ‘during’? You’ve seen how aggressive she is sometimes! She puts him in danger!”

Danny heard the creaking of a bed as his dad flopped down onto it with a sigh. “She’s probably swept him off his feet, too.” Okay, so maybe Val has rescued him a few times, even carried him bridal style once, but he’s saved her, too!

His dad continued, regardless of Danny’s wounded pride, “I know how hard it is to resist a force of a woman.”

Danny’s thoughts came to a halt. What was with that tone…

He heard the shuffling of sheets. “Speaking from experience, are we?” his mom asked with a chuckle.

“You’d know it, you were there,” his dad replied - and nope! That was about enough for Danny. He was glad his parents had a happy marriage but he did not need to hear how happy it was.

He retreated to his room, head buzzing with the mess he and Val had gotten themselves into.

Crud.

–

Danny had been trying for a week.

He’d flunked his English paper (the assignment wasn’t about Caesar, go figure), and he’d been dodging Valerie all week. A few months ago, he would’ve meant dodging her blasts and hits, but now he meant trying to get out of hanging out with her or - Ancients forbid - having her come to his house. It also meant that by virtue of not wanting to make Valerie feel like she was being excluded, he couldn’t have Sam or Tucker over, either. He was starting to lose his mind all alone in the house. And no, he was not going to Jazz for help about it.

Look, it was an embarrassing problem, okay? His parents disapproved of the relationship they thought he had with the ghost-fighting alter ego of his girlfriend because they thought it was reckless and put him in danger. And they knew about it because they’d basically walked in on their more… private moments. Letting them actually meet with Red and lecturing her on how to properly protect him and save him like the damsel in distress they thought he was for being so afraid of ghosts this whole time was a total no-go - he’d never hear the end of from Val!

He was trying to figure out why this whole situation felt so familiar when Jazz walked in on him pacing the length of his room. She opened her mouth to speak, but he cut her off. “Can it. I don’t wanna hear it, Jazz.”

She pouted a little at that, then huffed. “If you’re not going to listen to my advice about healthy communication in all relationships in your life, just let me say that our parents are stubborn to a fault. If they latch onto an idea, they need solid proof to discount it.” She shot him A Look. “You know that better than anyone.”

She turned on her heel with a little ‘harrumph!’ and disappeared from his doorway, her orange hair swinging as she went.

Danny sighed, and tried to get back into brainstorming convincing arguments against his parents. He’d tried to completely deny that anything had happened between him and the Red Huntress, claiming that in this freaky town, it could’ve been ghosts! (You know, the ol’ reliable). He’d told them that at most, the Red Huntress was just a friend. Then his dad started to ask him why he blushed whenever they brought it up and started to tease him and… he lost that argument pretty soon after. He went for a partial denial after that one. He wasn’t dating the Red Huntress, they’d just made out a couple of times. Sort of like a fakeout-makeout, even. That one made his parents angry. “Son,” his dad had said with a distinct tone of fatherly disappointment, “I did not raise you to play with people’s feelings. If you’re not dating the Huntress, then–” “Just kidding! Haha, I meant that we weren’t dating at the time! Wait. I mean, we’re not dating!” Danny resisted the urge to put his head in his hands. That went well. He’d even considered outright telling them that he was dating Valerie and showing them proof, but he shut that idea down. What if they thought he was a two-timer (ugh.). What if they put two and two together for once and figured out that she was the Red Huntress? And he didn’t want to drag Valerie as proof over just to have her watch him either be very awkward with his parents or argue with them. Valerie had too much on her plate for her to be wasting her time in his family drama.

Wait, what was it that Jazz had said about ‘proof’? That his parents were stubborn and needed it to be convinced of something. Well, duh. They were scientists. Sure, though they had definitely dropped the idea a while ago, they used to be extremely biased against ghosts. They held onto the idea that all ghosts were evil so stubbornly that Danny was legit afraid to be around them in the beginning. At least they’d warmed up to Phantom lately.

But what proof did his parents need? They actually had too much proof on their side, evidence that Danny couldn’t refute.

Something green glinted in his peripheral vision, His head whipped around to look at it, and he found himself staring at his reflection in the mirror. In his stress, his eyes had turned that otherworldly green, a shade that seemed so out of place with his regular complexion and black hair.

Oh, right. There was something else that his parents were being stubborn about.

(Maybe it was related? Jazz could look into their family’s seemingly genetic stubbornness, but – she probably already has several papers on it.)

He sighed. He didn’t need to convince his family that he was dating Valerie, not the Red Huntress (because, hey, they were right for once. Sort of. And he didn’t want to ask Val to fake-date him or something, it’d just be too complicated). He needed proof to convince them that dating her was not putting him at risk.

He ran a hand across his face, and in the reflection he could see that his eyes had smoothly transitioned from green back to blue. He sighed. He was going to need to ask his sister for advice on this one.

–

Danny waited until the last second to dodge a glowing green ghostly cube of doom, stepping nonchalantly to the side in midair and watching the Box Ghost’s frustrated reaction with smug satisfaction. But he’s not ignoring the guy just to mess with him. He was just focused on someone else.

“Red!” he hissed. Normally, he’d love to just watch her during combat, because in the fruitloop’s words, she really was good at this, but he needed to talk to her. They were flying higher than some of the buildings around, but his parents were directly beneath them and for all he knew, they’d made a Ghost-Whisper-Detector-Inator or something.

“Oh, so now you wanna talk!” she replied, the distortion from her helmet making her voice sound more metallic and making her angry tone all the more sharp and unsettling. She grunted as she hefted one of her heavier canons onto her shoulder before taking a shot at the Box Ghost. Danny winced as the projectile hit its mark directly and the poor guy got launched a couple blocks down the road. The two of them sped toward where he’d crashed into a wall and blocked his exits, one of them on either side of him. It was way overkill and the Red Huntress was clearly fuming, but Danny couldn’t resist saying, “Guess you could say we boxed him in.”

He couldn’t tell if the groan that came from the Box Ghost was a result of his injuries or Danny’s pun.

Red came closer, pressing a finger to his chest. “I’m about ready to box your hide–”

Danny’s voice cracked as he interrupted her, “Yep! So, can we have this little lovers’ spat over there,” he pointed at a nearby rooftop that was just tall enough to give them some privacy from people on the street, “you know, where my parents won’t see?” He put his hands in the air as he floated away slowly, toward that rooftop. Behind him, he heard Red huff before the telltale humming of her board followed him there.

As soon as they alighted on the roof, the Red Huntress stored her board away and took off her helmet. Valerie’s long, brown curls billowed in the wind and Danny tried not to stare. The whole Technus-enhanced suit she used to have was cool and all, but it was a little creepy, especially since Technus had been so… involved in their first relationship. He much preferred this suit, made by Tucker and the rest of the team using both Vladco and Fenton Works tech. She crossed her arms. “Start talking, Ghost-boy.”

Danny blinked. That took him back to the good ol’ days of when she was trying to kill him - was he sure Clockwork wasn’t messing with the timestream or something?

“Right,” he started, “So, sorry for ghosting you this past week.” His eyes widened in alarm. “Pun not intended, pun not intended!”

She just scoffed and muttered under her breath, “Yeah, right.” But some of the tension left her shoulders, and he could tell that she was holding back a smile. He took it as a sign to continue. He’d been trying to figure out the best way to explain the whole thing, but in the end he just said, “My parents think you and I are dating.”

She cocked an eyebrow at that. “And is that the problem?”

“Sort of.” He reached for her helmet. “You see, they think you,” he gestured to the red helmet in his hands, “are dating me,” he quickly transformed and gestured to his human self. “They think you’re putting me in danger,” he sighed, handing the helmet back to her.

Valerie took the helmet back and his words in slowly. Then she burst into laughter. “They think that I,” she said in between chuckles, “am putting Danny ‘Protector of Amity Park’ and ‘Heir to the Ghost Throne’ Phantom in danger?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Danny groaned. He knew it. He was never going to hear the end of this. She was going to tell the rest of the gang using the groupchat that he was definitely not a part of.

“So that’s why they’ve been chasing me down all week, too,” she added, calming down.

“They’ve been what?” Danny felt a sudden wave of guilt wash over him. He’d been so caught up with trying to keep Valerie free from the stress that his family was causing him that he hadn’t even bothered to check in with her.

She shrugged. “Guess their shouts of ‘Something something my son!’ and ‘Stay away!’ make a lot more sense now. For a moment there, I thought they were tryna run me outta town.” She looked him in the eye. “Is that what it was like for you, y’know,” she said quietly, “before?”

Danny stepped closer to her, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “Sorta.” He held her hands through her suit’s gloves and was happy to feel her give him a returning squeeze. “But that was before, and my parents have been harassing you all week. Are you okay?” “They’ve been harassing both of us all week and we just didn’t know it,” she chuckled. “What idiots. I just missed you, is all.”

He sighed. Jazz was right (Jazz was always right), if he’d just communicated with his relationships or something… “Sorry,” he said again. She just nodded.

“So, what’s your plan?”

–

“You sure you’re okay with telling my parents?” “Oh, yeah, it’s totally fine.” She narrowed her eyes at him. “It’s not like you already revealed my secret identity to my dad and got me in a lot of trouble.”

“Hey!” he protested. “It was one time…” he added guiltily, rubbing the back of his neck.

She grinned and punched his arm playfully. “I know, I know. Not like I didn’t deserve it.”

He frowned a little. That was true, but he still felt like the action had crossed a line. If anyone knew the importance of a secret identity, it would be him. He reached for her hand and she accepted the gesture, holding his hand as they walked to the edge of the roof. “True,” he said. “You used to be pretty morally Gray.”

“You are lucky I love you, Fenton.”

He stopped just short of being visible to those on the ground and gaped at her. She was shorter than him, but she stood tall with all her confidence and an expectant smirk. There was a challenge in her eyes, even if maybe the effect was kinda thrown off by the blush on her cheeks.

“I love you, too,” he said, and she rolled her eyes as if to say ‘duh.’ “And I love that you won’t whoop my ass in front of my parents? Unless, uh, you wanna show me all fifty shades–”

Valerie pressed a quick kiss to his lips before he could finish that sentence. “I love you, but that won’t help you if I hear the end of that sentence.” Helmet back on, she pulled him by the scruff of his shirt and yanked him onto her board before launching them both off the edge toward his parents.

“There she is, Maddie! And Danny-boy’s here, too?”

“Red Huntress! Be careful with my son!”

Red guided the board smoothly over until they arrived in front of his parents.

“Don’t worry, sweetie,” his mom greeted him as soon as he and Valerie stepped onto the street, “we already dealt with the Box Ghost that Phantom just left for us.”

“Now, Maddie,” his dad interjected. “The Box Ghost is small fry! Phantom trusts us with that kind of thing.” “I suppose you’re right,” she conceded with a sigh. And– Danny knew that this truce was the longest one that had ever lasted between Phantom and his parents, and he knew that Jazz had beaten the anti-ghost bias out of them a long time ago, but hearing the way they were so quick to defend and accept his alter ego now was still jarring. In all this time, even if he didn’t realize it, he was already a lot more relaxed about his identity, not caring if he let something suspicious slip or sometimes even being careless on purpose. It’s just that his parents were too stubborn to see it.

“Speaking of the Ghost-boy,” his dad continued, “where’d he go?”

“We’ll deal with that in a sec,” Danny dismissed easily. He gestured to the Huntress behind him. She stepped forward as confident as ever, her hand outstretched for a handshake. “Mom, Dad, this is my girlfriend, the Red Huntress.” He watched as his mom accepted the gesture easily, though somewhat stiffly, while his dad’s handshake threatened to pull Red off her feet. “But you also know her from somewhere else.”

On cue, his girlfriend took off her helmet, and Danny continued despite his parents’ shocked gasps, “Val, these are my parents.”

His dad was the first to speak up. “Damon’s girl?” He chuckled with delight. “I knew you were out of Danny’s league!”

“Hey!” he started, but Valerie spoke up for him instead. “If anything, Mr. Fenton, your son’s too good for me,” she said, looking back at him with big, green eyes. He shook his head at her, and put a hand on her shoulder.

“You can call him, Jack, dear,” his mom said. She’d taken off her hood and goggles and she was smiling softly at the two of them. “And I’m Maddie. It’s nice to really meet you.”

Danny and Valerie smiled at each other. “It’s good that I can tie a face that I trust to your girlfriend, Danny,” his mom said. “But! That doesn’t mean that she can take you around with her to ghost fights if we don’t set some ground rules first.” The older woman turned to Valerie. “I know you’re more than capable of taking care of yourself, but poor Danny’s been afraid of his own shadow since the ghost portal went up, you see.” Danny’s dad nodded. “Gotta make sure our boy is looked after!”

“Actually,” Danny butt in, “I can take care of myself.” His parents went quiet and looked at each other. His heart was pounding.

“It’s good to be confident, Danno! But–”

“No ‘buts’, Dad. I haven’t been completely honest with you guys, and it’s not fair to ask Val to reveal her identity when my reveal is way overdue.” He looked down at the street, missing the way his mother’s hand traveled to her mouth and his dad’s jaw was set with knowing determination. Valerie’s hand found his and squeezed it reassuringly. He took a deep breath.

The rings of his transformation glided smoothly over his form. When he opened his eyes to look at his parents, he tensed for just a moment as his vision was filled with the sight of the two of them barrelling toward him. But then they both crushed him in a hug, and all the tension left his shoulders. Even Val was squished in here with him and he laughed wetly. “I guess you guys finally caught the Ghost-boy, huh? Guess you weren’t ex-specter that one!” Then everyone groaned.

After a while, they all pulled away.

“Don’t think we won’t be having talks about all of,” his mom gestured vaguely to him, then to themselves, “this.”

“Oh, sonny, there’ll be a lot of talking to do.” The man looked to his wife. “And I’m going to have to edit the ‘birds and the bees’ spiel a bit, eh? We gotta take into account all your ghostly biology, after all!”

“My ghostly…” Danny turned as green as ectoplasm. Val was as red as her suit.

“Dad!” he whined, making his parents chuckle.

It wasn’t perfect, but, eh. They’d figure it out.

–

“So, how did you end up thinking that Danny was dating the Red Huntress?” Valerie asked, and Danny choked on his mom’s mac and cheese. He glared at Jazz from across the table, and she tried her best to stifle a laugh.

“Well…” his mom started, looking at her husband with a knowing smirk on her face.

“Mom!” he said, accidentally flashing his eyes green.

“No ghost powers at the table, sweetie,” she replied without missing a beat. He huffed and sat back in his seat. He met Valerie’s eye and she had one eyebrow up in an expression that felt like she thought she should be amused, but she didn’t know why yet. Oh, she was going to regret that fast.

His dad picked up the story, “You know the janitor’s closet on the third floor of Casper High?”

#phic phight 2023 #danny phantom #gray ghost #my writing #team ghost #identity reveal #one shot

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justallihere · 19 days

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Alli this chapter was such a nice surprise !!

Violet is a sarcastic queen "we can hold hands" she says to Liam as if the only person she wants to hold hands with is not her husband. Liam and Violet are very special to me and the way you write them is very unique. He's so protective of her but she's also very strict on her boundaries in the friendship which I love for her.

Oh so the panflet did make its rounds in this fic. Devera u sneaky bitch I know what u are (a traitor). This is a perfect opportunity to reveal some truths but because our Violet is indeed the queen of a whole ass country I doubt she's gonna do that, there's just too much at stake, but I do wish she had done something in canon. I wonder if she's gonna talk to Devera here? If she even suspects it was her?

“Be logical, riders,” Markham said as he collected the last of the leaflets. “When has Navarre ever sent a riot of only Blue dragons? I expect better from you all. More critical thinking. It will be imperative once you’re out of Basgiath and on the battlefield.” oh this is pure gold the way propaganda is discussed here is just so good. i love these conflicts.

Jack is back ?? creating chaos for sure. maybe trying to murder violet? omg imagine violet being able to see that he's a venin way earlier bc she's sees the sage way too often in her dreams and when she sees jack she goes "umm that's weird, that's suspicious" Also I've always thought Baide was sus for keeping it hidden i hope the damn dragon dies. maybe tairn can actually kill a dragon this time.

Oh Xaden is just so miserable my poor baby "I know you're awake" ohhhh u wanna talk to her so bad. Violet acknowledging they have a routine is very special to me and an improvement. As much as it hurt me them sleeping in separate beds it's very much needed bc they need to TALK I'm just waiting for the chapter in which they will fight so bad they both break and then they'll make up.

their conversations in the dark !! they need each other so badly, the weight of ruling is heavy and while xaden may try to play it off he doesn't handle it well either.

“Yes and no. Eventually you get used to it. You stop feeling the weight. You do the best you can with what you have, and you make so many horrible choices that it’s all you know, and you have to make yourself stop second-guessing. It’ll drive you mad if you don’t.” Sir what u need is therapy.

Violet talking about her dying before seeing her future and Xaden saying she'll live and then Violet calling him a liar … THATS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT !! and followed by her calling Aretia home and Xaden having a mini breakdown over it ? oh he's very screwed indeed but she isn't much better. i wonder when will she realize its him that's home and not Aretia the place.

also xaden suffering the consequences (violet putting herself in danger for the good of Tyrrendor) of his own actions?? we love to see it but also omg the angst !! he's just like "pls sit down don't do anything dangerous"

"We’re married. We’re supposed to be a team." she knew she had him with that, the only thing he wants more than for her to live its for them to be a team. the cant live without u line is very on brand for violet denial sorrengail to misinterpret love that !!

love the bodhi and violet crumbs !! they're family they need to interact more i also think they'd be a formidable pair against xaden just to annoy him lmao. but for now bodhi will rat her out to xaden !! he's part of the "violet and xaden should talk like rational adults" club. also they're so married bickering so so married they're disgusting actually. (him not missing the opportunity to call her beautiful, sir you are not that sneaky i see u)

xaden agreeing to go with violet on her suicide mission is very supportive partner coded gottalove that !! cant wait to see him go ballistic when shes tortured.

once again you've delivered such a good chapter thank u so much <3

My favorite thing about Violet is that she’s kind of a bitch because so am I and we deserve that representation. She loves Liam so very much but my girl likes her space

Violet and Devera talk soon-ish. I love Devera so much, I need more of her

Xaden and Violet are in their married couple era for SURE, there’s more communication from them in the coming chapters and it’s gonna hurt and it’s gonna be so good I can’t wait

“what u need is therapy” that’s what Garrick and Bodhi are for 😭😭

Listen like it’s so important to me that they follow through on the things they agreed to. They talked and they decided no more secrets and they would do everything together from now on and they took that shit SERIOUSLY!! It’s part of their married dynamic, I love them

Thank you so much for reading 🩷🩷🩷

#storm in the quiet

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lepoppeta · 1 year

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For the fanfic ask thing: 6, 7, 8, 17, 22, 23, 26, 29, 35, 39, 42, 49, 68 and 75 c:

6. What's the last line you wrote?

"... he may yet make a surprisingly great trainer!"

Victor couldn't help the sneer of his top lip, or the darkening of his brow, or the way he parted his teeth just slightly and asked: "What do you mean, 'surprisingly'?"

Title: To the Victor Goes the Spoils

Fandom: Pokémon (Sword & Shield)

Relationship(s): Victor/Hop

7. Post a snippet from a WIP.

Brassius has no classmates to celebrate with; no teachers to particularly thank. Within the month, he finds an empty warehouse studio in Artazon for his fantastical sculptures and fills the gardens of his new home with roses; agave; blackberries.

Title: Carnivore

Fandom: Pokémon (Scarlet & Violet)

Relationship(s): Hassel/Brassius

8. Post an out-of-context spoiler from a WIP.

"Jack we have to go."

"... I can't."

"We have to, pet. We'll be found if we stay here, and to be quite frank..." he trails off, wincing. He folds his lips together ponderously and tries again: "... to be honest, you don't look like you could squash a roach, let alone kill a Splicer."

Title: Dark and Familiar and Deep as the Sea (re-write)

Fandom: Bioshock 1 + 2

Relationship(s): Jack Ryan/Atlas

17. Do you have a writing routine?

Absolutely not.

22. Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?

Fandom and music have always gone hand in hand for me, so most of my titles end up being song lyrics!

I usually write with a title in mind, but sometimes it changes during the "drafting" process.

23. What is the easiest and what is the hardest: beginnings, middles, ends?

Beginnings are easier, certainly.

Endings are very difficult for me. I have a hard time conceptualizing a good stopping point in my stories; a lot of the time they keep going of their own volition, but not necessarily linearly.

26. What's your least favourite part of the writing process?

Drafting.

I can't do word vomit; I can't write things badly on purpose; I don't entirely understand how drafting works. Someone needs to take my brain and my hands and do it for me so I can have the template muscle memory to do it on my own.

29. What's something about your writing that you're proud of?

I like to think that I'm quite good at dialogue, and I think I'm getting better at making my overall prose snappier and more minimalist.

35. What's your favourite fic that you've posted?

Overall? Probably At the End of the Line (Maybe a Diamond Ring). It's relatively well-written; the ending actually ends somewhat cleanly; it paces well compared to most of my other works. I'm pleased with it. I wouldn't change it.

More recently, I'm quite fond of My Lover Stands on Golden Sands, but I also don't like the ending all that much anymore. I feel like it just... falls off at the end.

39. Most self-indulgent WIP?

I wouldn't strictly call it a WIP, but I still have a few passages from a completed Nuzlocke (OmegaRuby / X) that I was going to transfer into a prose format. It has a lot of headcanons and self-insert-y elements without it being a straight-up self-insert fanfiction.

42. What's your favourite title you've come up with?

Mentioned above, I have two (named) Pokémon stories in the works. One is "Carnivore" and one is "To the Victor Goes the Spoils". I like both.

Out of my published works I think Dark and Familiar and Deep as the Sea is my favourite (although this fic I'd hardly consider to be published in its current state). The Blue Tide Pulling me Under is also pretty up there.

49. What fic of yours would you say is the best introduction to you as a writer?

I don't think I can accurately answer this because I kind of know what I want my writing to aspire to be, but I don't really know what it is. I don't know my own quirks, I only can hazard a guess as to what I would want them to be. It would probably be a question better posed to a member of my audience rather than me.

However, true as I may think that is, it's a bit of a cop-out answer. If I had to choose I'd probably pick Athair. It needs to be re-written, though.

68. Are there any fics that influenced you to write the way that you do?

My one true fanfiction love is Hang the Fool, and that's probably influenced me the most in terms of style. It's a story that's repetitive without lingering past its welcome; it's very articulate while still being descriptive. I admire it greatly.

75. Is there a particular fic that your readers gravitate towards that you didn't expect?

My five most popular works are as follows:

Aphrodite

Athair

You're Gonna be My Bruise

Frame and Wire

The Blue Tide Pulling me Under

I don't understand why Aphrodite is ranked so highly. Maybe because it's my oldest Bioshock work and has simply been around the longest? I think it's pretty crap now, but I also think some of my newer stuff is worse.

You're Gonna be My Bruise I think is the biggest surprise. I truly think this is my worst one. It's too short. It's written poorly. It is simply bad. Why do you people like it so much?

#ask game #answered ask #fanfiction #my writing #bioshock #cats the musical #pokemon

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petitelepus · 3 years

Text

His Beloved And More, Part 9 FINAL

Brainstorm tries his last chance to unite with you.

Quick thank you for all you Readers who liked my dark love story! This was a pleasure to post and I’ll focus on my “Detroit Become Human” story, alongside with the requests!

Happy Midsummer everyone! <3

"Tell me Rodimus, why you wanted us to visit this trader comet?" Megatron asked from his co-captain who was munching on a rust stick. The bright red mech glanced at the former warlord and shrugged. "No clue. Brainstorm told us that he had to pick something up from there."

"He has been down lately. More than usual after the liaison's demise." Megatron pointed out and Rodimus picked another stick. "What do you want me to do about it, he hasn't left his habsuite other than to work, and even then he has been playing with lab rats."

"How do you know this and why wasn't I informed?"

Rodimus shrugged, "Didn't know you cared?"

"That I don't care about a mech who build a time machine in order to alter the timeline and possibly kill me in favor of saving a mech he had a crush on? Rodimus, what do you think he would do if he lost a lover, not a crush!"

Rodimus stared at Megatron quietly and after a minute he bit his rust stick. "Scrap. That didn't cross my mind."

"Of course it didn't..."

On the trader comet, Figaro 19-4, Brainstorm had left the crewmates and friends that had insisted on joining him on what appeared like any normal shopping spree, but it was more to the brilliant scientist. When Nautica and Rewind dragged others to look at the alien pets in the display window, Brainstorm left the group and sneaked into the dark alleys of the trader comet.

The flyer looked around, reading the virtual map he had gotten from the darknet, and followed the trail until he stood before a shady door. Brainstorm inserted the key chip he had gotten when he had first shown interest in making a deal with this mech and the door slid open, revealing a wine red con with yellow optics.

"You SpaceBrainiac?" The con asked and the scientist nodded. "That would be me. You must be CopperJack."

"Yeah. You came alone, right?" Jack asked as he looked around the alley as he ushered Brainstorm inside before closing and locking the door.

~~~~~~~~~

Ultra Magnus, Rodimus, and Megatron stared at the scene unfolding before their optics at Swerve's bar. Everyone had gathered around this table in the middle of the room and they were shooting questions left and right at this new mysterious femme that none of them had seen before.

Rodimus blinked and rubbed his optics before taking another look like he couldn't believe what he was seeing. A sleek femme bot that had a black and lilac paint job, the yellow cockpit on her chest, wings sprouting from her back, and glasses close to Rung's own over her crimson optics. What Rodimus and others couldn't believe was the similarity.

"She is like a spitting image of liaison," Rodimus whispered, and Megatron and Ultra Magnus nodded beside him. The similarity was almost eery. Suddenly Brainstorm noticed the three mechs and excused him and the femme from the gawking Autobots and friends to bring her to captains and Ultra Magnus.

"Captains and Magnus, I would love to introduce Lunarwing to you!" Brainstorm cheered and pointed at you, "She would love to join our crew if that is okay with you captains!"

"Depends..!" Rodimus scowled and looked at her suspiciously. "Were you a Decepticon who had a change of Spark and are now looking for a meaning all around the universe?"

"Not as far as I can remember." You replied and the Autobots glanced at each other before looking at you again. "You don't know if you were Decepticon or Autobot?"

"Oh no, I remember being in war... I just can't recall my position..." You murmured but then you brightened up and wrapped your arms around Braintorm's arm. "But I remember Brainstorm and how he makes me feel safe!"

~~~~~~~~~

The flier followed the Decepticon into the dark halls until they came to an open space, filled with rows and rows of Cybertroanians' frames in comatose. Jack laughed and motioned the scientist to approach them. "You came for a living sex doll, didn't you? Well, here is my warehouse! Take a look if you want, they're all first-class frames!"

"So you said all these bots and cons are prisoners from the time during the war?" Brainstorm asked as he took in the frames frozen in time and tried one's servos. They showed no signs of being damaged or treated badly. They were as good as the day they were back then when they were shipped into front lines.

"Well, after my squad got there it became 'lost in war'." The con revealed and laughed, "They were captured by high ranking Decepticons and trusted my squad to take them to Grindcore. You know, the prison camp? Ever heard of it?"

How could he had not heard of it? It was the very same camp they took his beloved Quark to. Brainstorm grunted, memories of his beloved hunting him, just like memories of you did. The scientist nodded grimly. "I've heard of it."

"Honestly, I did these guys a favor! That camp was a deathtrap! Now they can live!"

"As someone's sex doll?" Brainstorm asked and glanced at the con. The violet mech shrugged and stopped smiling. "Life is tough. It doesn't matter if they are aware of it. Now, are you picking one or should I kick you out?"

There was a clear warning in the mech's tone that Brainstorm didn't miss. The flier shook his head and the con grinned again. "No harm, no foul. Pick one that pleases the optic most."

Brainstorm nodded and walked down the lines of war prisoners. He looked at each one carefully, but none were pleasing him as he would have liked to. Too tall, too small, too thin, too thick. Nothing pleased him enough to buy... Until he came upon this gorgeous femme's frame and when he looked at her face he saw you. The brilliant scientist blinked in shock and turned to look at the Decepticon selling the frames.

"How much is she?" He asked and the con chuckled. "Aah, the good old femme fatale. She costs 30 000 Shanix."

Just about how much Brainstorm had. The flier nodded and gave the seller a chip filled with the Shanix needed. The con checked the chip and nodded, pleased with the currency that switched owners. The purple mech flicked his hand and long needless that mnemosurgeons used to alter their patients' minds and more sprung out from the tips of his fingers. "Mind to give me info on what you want?"

Brainstorm nodded and picked up a little note that had everything he wanted from the shady Decepticon. The con took the note and read it over before giving hie looked at the scientist, "You seriously want your toy to have its own mind? They can go and fall for someone else than the master, aka you, if you let them wander."

"She." Brainstorm corrected the con with a weak glare, "And she has every right to do what she wants with the memories and personality I gave you."

"Okay," The con nodded and sank the needless into the back of the femme's neck, "Just so you know, it's your funeral."

~~~~~~~~~

The captains accepted Brainstorm's story about you, though alarmed but the scientist knew they had no evidence about his plans, both failed and successed. As soon as they left you two alone you looked at your lover with your bright crimson optics gleaming behind your glasses.

"Brainstorm..."

"Yes my beloved?"

"I don't remember much... But I feel like I've always known you." You confessed to Brainstorm and the scientist smiled behind his mask as he took your hands into his, "I know and I just want you to know that I love you also."

You smiled and leaned in to kiss his mask's edge before pulling back with an honest and loving smile. "I really do love you." You confessed and Brainstorm smiled.

Deep down the brilliant scientist knew that he had to let you go... Or, your memories of Earth and everything that happened at least. He did donate your personality to the comatose femme and make you love him once again but this time he wouldn't let anything or anyone come between you two. After all, this was all for the sake of love.

#transformers mtmte #mtmte #transformers #Brainstorm #reader #yandere #reader insert #rodimus #Rodimus Prime #ultra magnus #megatron #writing #my writing #story #my story

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hamihamstik · 3 years

Text

idk what the fuck did i do to yeah get ready for visual cancer and my bad writing.

´´John, that's enough! ´´ claims an annoying Alexander, a 17-year-old boy who attends Columbia University, this boy had charming eyes of a blue color combined with violet and a curly hair dyed a strong brown that He could almost look red, not forgetting his beautiful freckles which were scattered all over his face. He had to admit that he was very feminine and his height and body did not help, he was very handsome among women and men although he denied it. Taking her hands off his insistent boyfriend, John, the ones that only managed to scare him.

And it was October 31 and instead of going out to party with the boys or the Schuyler sisters, he could even stay with Gil or George and Martha but no, he had decided to stay with John in his apartment, to watch movies, taking advantage of his parents and siblings are not there.

Serious mistake.

You're a coward. . .''John jokes, continuing with the pinches that distract the freckled, in his attempt to pay attention. They were watching the Japanese version of ´´The Aro´´ and the truth is that Alex was on the verge of a heart attack, he was not good at horror films, although he had a masochistic taste for these types of films.

´´John, seriously. . .Y-stop! ´´ he asks in a not so convincing way, noticing how the blond's hands begin to slip through his clothes. Alexander knows that they are alone and that they will probably do "that" to take advantage of the time together; he resists anyway.

deep down he liked that Laurens wanted more of him.

Come on, you know the end. They all die, '' he whispers in Alex's ear and although he knows he is right, his hoarse and excited voice is what disturbs him.

In less than he expects, he's already got John on top of him and he's collapsed on the bed in a struggle actually. . .not so forced. And that although he does not want to admit it, Alexander likes that rude and daring side that he rarely showed and despite that, it was ´´Jack´´ who started this type of encounter, mostly to commit indecent acts and explore the joys of sex.

´´ Why don´t you stop Lex? ´´ jokes John with a little impatience and his cock is too erect. ´´oh! I don't know, maybe it's because I have a fucking fear that a woman will appear from the TV and kill us? ´ 'Alex sarcastically responds, with a small blush peeking out of his freckled cheeks and managing to get a small laugh from both of them. Listening to Alex's melodious laugh, for John it was music to his ears, but, if he had known this was going to happen, he would have put him in one of those 80's movies, with those he hadn't had any problems the last time.

"It doesn't matter, we'll fix it," he says, smiling confidently and pulling his pants down on his embarrassed and sarcastic boyfriend. Leaving those slender and shapely legs in sight.

He didn't need his dick to lift anyway, as long as he loosened it would be fine.

´´J-jack, u-hm. . . ” Alex gasps when he feels Laurens's tongue brush against her belly button in circles, as his hands venture up his thighs, spreading them wide open. In the background you can still hear the screams of the horror movie.

Movie that they will never finish seeing.

"Do you like it?" Jack asks between gasps and his cock about to burst. He had spent minutes preparing hard the contracted entrance of his dear boy, who would not stop panting and letting out moans that made him lose what little patience he had. ´´Y-yes. . I think I'm ready," he announces to which John, instantly, unbuttons his pants. Releasing his aching erection.

´´Ngh. . . Alex´´ John moans hoarsely against his ear, at the same time that he aligned his cock in his tight entrance, without waiting any longer, the blonde enters suddenly, drawing a groan from both of them at feeling so complete. It didn't take long when he began to thrust into his ass, as the sound of the bed and their sexual release filled the room. For a moment, none of them feel the noise of the film anymore. They are both gone in that dance of sweaty bodies that invokes pleasure and to which they have become addicted without knowing how.

Until something rings.

´´What was that? ´´ asks Alexander to the busy John, who doesn´t even flinch at the loud sound. He is still very immersed in his work of going out and going into the depths of his being.

A second noise is heard.

'' John. . .´´ Alex insists, starting to get really scared. It sounded like knocks, coming from the first floor. ´´Alex, for the shit stop squeezing me ngh !. ... it must be a fucking bird crashing into the window.´´ he tries to calm him down, feeling how his member is compressed against his insides, every time the freckled body tenses.

"What if he is your father?"

The blond's face pales at the horrendous possibility.

"Shit, get dressed!" He says, completely leaving his entrance, and then running off to get their clothes. He throws Alex's clothes at his face, ordering him to stay in the room and for no reason leave there, until verifying if he is his father.

He doesn't know about their relationship, nor that Alexander is in the house. . His presence of him there would be something very annoying to explain.

(…)

The minutes pass and John does not return, Alex begins to worry.

´´John? ´´ he asks once in the kitchen, he chosen to go downstairs anyway. They had spent several minutes without knowing anything about her boyfriend and now she was really scared

He walks towards the front door. . .

It's open.

. . .

With a little chill through running her body, he quickly goes to the kitchen for something to threaten his possible aggressor. He takes a knife, but since he does not consider himself a murderer, he decides to exchange it for a large meat grinder. At least with this one he could take down the possible intruder, before escaping.

Alexander, barely breathing, creeps into the house. There is no noise in it and no sign of John. So, drawing courage from him, he does not know where, he goes outside through the backyard door, where the entrance to the shed can be seen ajar.

A stain of what appears to be blood can be seen on the door of this and causes the freckled young man to collect his heart. Then, shivering and tears streaming from his violet eyes, he enters desperately.

´´J-jack? ´´ he asks with a shaking voice and gasping for breath. He does not see the blond, because it is very dark. He advances looking for the wall switch and then. . .

Then he steps on something that made his blood run cold.

´´AHHHHHHH !! ´´ he yells when he steps on something similar to a body, then realizing that it is just a very battered scarecrow. He breathes a sigh of relief and luckily for him, he finally finds the light switch.

He turns it on.

´´AHHHHHHHHHH !!!! ´´

Alexander runs terrified of the place before what he saw. A shed full of blood-red stains and something that looked like guts scattered on the floor, but what had scared him the most was the dark cloak one that he could make out at the bottom of a corner.

It was that of a person.

. . .

Alarmed, he enters the house and without being able to reach the bathroom, in the kitchen dishwasher he begins to vomit. His body trembles and tears of deep pain fall from his eyes, as he thinks about the possibility of what he saw spread across the walls and floor. . . was his jack

-Hey, don't you think we went out of line?-

-Shut up dumb.-

-oh god, I can't anymore.-

-It was your idea, I'm just following you, asshole! -

-my idea?, it was Ben! -

-Don't blame me for his perversions, when Alex finds out he's going to hit us with that butcher's machete.-

Three young people comment on their joke while hiding in some bushes, unfortunately, precisely the ones facing the kitchen.

(…)

'' Shit, we're more than screwed. . .´´ are Benjamin's words as he sees Alexander open the bushes, revealing his hiding place. His face overcomes what is anger. His eyes are still red from crying and his serious gesture is one of complete hatred.

And he still has the machete in his hand.

"B-ben, weren't we going to the party?" Hale asks Benjamin, who nods nervously, because he knows that if they don't get out of there. . . . they will go very badly.

Alexander although he seems a weakling, but he has strength.

And a machete.

´´y-yes´´ supports him ´´ well dude. . . take care! ´´ Benjamin says goodbye, slapping John on the back, in an attempt to give him support. Although rather, it is a gesture of condolences to his sexual life.

Tonight someone was going to stay without fucking.

(…)

´´Alex,. .hey. . .´´ He tries to get closer to the redhead, taking care that the minor does not split his head.

´´NO! ´´ Alex jerks away from the arm that is trying to take him. "DON'T TOUCH ME, YOU'RE A DAMNED IDIOT!" He shouts angrily, trying not to give her the satisfaction of seeing him break into tears.

Although he was already doing it.

John, like few times in his life, feels bad about the things that

he does. And he had never seen Alex like this.

Crying as if his life were lost on it, and with so much sorrow in his eyes.

This time,

He messed it up.

´´Alex, sorry. . .´´ he whispers and makes a second attempt to get closer, which this time, if it seems to work. His dear boy is so sad and hurt that he does not resist when John embraces him, pulling him close to his body. ´´ I already told you I'm sorry, I'm fine. . Come on, don't cry. . .´´ he tries to calm him down, stroking his back and giving him small kisses on his face full of small salty tears.

'I-I thought you were dead. . .I-I saw all those things and. . .´´ Alex tries to speak but only starts crying again. John, feeling like the worst beast in the world, accompanies him in bed. Laying him on his bed and settling aside to caress his face, guiltily, until he stops crying. Spreading kisses down his cheeks, which were now red as was his nose.

´´J-john no. . .'' Alex tries to stop him when he sees him approach his lips to his face, with the intention of kiss him. ´ ´I v-vomited´´ he confesses ashamed, hiccupping from crying.

´´ I don't care, it's okay. I can clean you with my tongue. . .´´ John insists, speaking flirtatiously to make him laugh again. He likes Alexander who usually laughs, who cries in this way hurts him, and more to know that it was his fault.

´´Stop your nonsense. . . . Can we sleep? ´´ asks what Laurens, trying to control her sexual / depressive urges, nods.

He would have to stay with it this time.

They both snuggle up, covering themselves well with the blankets and giving each other a couple of kisses before going to sleep.

A noise is heard again

Alexander, snuggled against Jack's chest, looks up. John, annoyed, decides to ignore the sound similar to that of a while ago.

Again he is heard again.

These idiots. . .´´ he complains, taking his cell phone to give Benjamin's life sermon. When he answers him, he receives exactly that.

-Hey idiot, are you retarded or what? Stop with your shit or seriously I'm going to kick your balls, and until they come out.

But it is not Benjamin who speaks, it is more, nobody answers. The music of the party is not heard either. Only someone's breathing can be heard in response, so terrifying it makes John hang up the phone and throw it to the ground as if on fire.

´´What's wrong? ´´ asks Alex, calmer now. Jack was a little pale. And is that John, had already heard that noise. He heard it when he stood at the entrance of the house, when he went out in search of what was generating that annoying blow, and then ended up meeting his friends and playing that stupid joke for which he now feared that the freckled man would really hate him.

"It's nothing, let's go back to sleep." He replies, trying to convince himself that it must be another stupid joke of those two. Alexander closes his eyes quietly but John cannot sleep, any noise alerts him. He has a bad feeling.

´´ What's wrong, can't you sleep? ´´ asks Alex, noticing how his Jack moves too much on the bed. . . "no. . . .i have a little insomnia" he confesses, not wanting to terrify him with the chilling thoughts of him.

Where there was still someone in his home.

´´ Me too´´ Alex mentions as he snuggles deeper into John's arms. "Do you want to fuck?" Asks the blonde, to which Alex just laughs. "Jack, don't think I forgot the joke," he replies to which John huffs, frustrated, assuming there really wouldn't be sex today.

´´ although I am surprised that they were so detailed with all that of the blood, guts and that dark suit.´´

´´What a dark suit? ´´ asks John, not remembering that in the plan.

´´the one with the disguise, the dark cape.´´

´´ There was no dark layer .´´

´´ but I saw someone at the back of the shed.´´

. . .

This is when John is more alarmed than before.

And when another noise is heard, this time they can both notice

Which is from a window on the first floor. and that this time they will not be able to see the light of a new day.

Morning news, yesterday October 31, two bodies were found on 123rd Street, because of the atrocious way in which they were murdered, they could not recognize them, however, thanks to our best police officers, we now know their names. John Laurens and Alexander Hamilton. we recommend not leaving the house while we still do not catch this man.

On tv there was an image of the murderer of that couple.

who could say that John Andre's jealousy would lead him to commit such an atrocity.

#horror #oneshot #lams #Hallowen is almost coming so #special before Hallowen (#I apologize for visual cancer #if you've never seen such bad writing before #now the time

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laufire · 4 years

Note

In depth fandom ask: the last fandom you joined bc I can't remember it now

Well, I guess the last fandom I’ve properly joined --making a few edits, starting yet-another-WIP etc.-- is Black Sails, so. Plus I want to talk about it a little, spoiler-free, in case you decide to watch it ^-^ (I’ll leave that to the s3 post I need to finish...).

Top 5 favourite characters: Max is my number one, without a doubt, and of the rest of my faves Silver has an edge... but the remaining positions are a tough fight between Flint, Jack, Madi and Miranda, and I honestly can’t choose DD:

Other characters you like: Mr. Scott, Anne, Idelle, the Maroon Queen, Billy, Eme, Abigail... This show has a lot of great characters tbh.

Least favourite characters: I still loathe Peter Ashe with every fiber of my being. Alfred Hamilton is obviously The Worst(TM). And though it hasn’t grown into hate (yet), I don’t like Woodes Rogers one bit ¬¬

Otps: Flint/Miranda, and the combos in Flint/Madi/Silver and Anne/Jack/Max (in no particular order at the moment because I just HAVE TONS OF FEELS ABOUT THEM ALL).

Notps: I don’t have strong NOPE feelings towards anything, but I’m not into Eleanor/Max (which is a dynamic I actually really like BUT that I’m glad it doesn’t return to shippiness LOL); Eleanor/Rogers (I might be indifferent towards Eleanor most of the time but I haaaaaate Rogers for her. RUN GIRL), Flint/Vane (booooooooring).

Favourite friendships: Max & Silver (THE duo I swear), Jack & Max, Flint & Silver, Idelle & Max (I might not have said so before but I guess I like a little conflict LMFAO), Billy & Flint (NOT a friendship, but their relationship absolutely cracks me up I swear. “Who’s Billy?” XDDD).

Favourite family: Madi’s family, which is all I can say without getting spoilery. I just. *lies down on the floor overcome with emotions* xDD

Favourite episodes: the problem with binge-watching (okay, I’ve taken s3 more slowly but) is that they all kinda blur together LOL. Hmm. The season finales are all *chefs kiss* so far (sometimes in a very painful way... I’m looking at you s2. Though the ominous Flint/Silver moments in the s3 were A LOT too); any in which I get to see Max & Silver scheming together ofc. And the first handful of eps in s3 were particularly enjoyable to me because I was drowning in PURE ANGST and Flint & Silver feels xDD (I can’t NOT believe the fandom seems to call one of those “the shark date” asñldfjasdfñl).

Favourite season/book/movie: oof. I honestly can’t pick; s1 is probably the “least” because the others include better moments for some of my secondary faves, and because there’s a plot that’s really hard to watch... BUT it has things on it I adore to pieces too. s1-2 doesn’t have Madi (major drawback xD), and s3 is after one of my faves’ death... but frankly they’re all neck and neck so far.

Favourite quotes: “I am ruined over you” always comes to mind DD: “Liked is just as good as feared”; Max combo with Eleanor about sand (typing that down made me think of Anidala LMFAO. The scene itself is very different though! xD) in the s1 finale; “in another time, in another place, they would call me a queen”; “this ends when I grant them my forgiveness, not the other way around”, Mr. Scott’s “No. Only YOU.”... honestly, this show’s dialogue is just too good(TM), I could just quote it all back xD. And of course, I HAVE to mention “WHO’S BILLY”. It’s the law.

Best musical moment: the score is perfection all around, but given that I never skip the intro just to listen and watch it... yeah, the intro xD

Moment that made you fangirl/boy the hardest: well, I *might* have lost it the moment CAPTAIN FLINT COMES OUT TO LONG JOHN SILVER OVER A BONFIRE, IDK XDD

When it really disappointed you: the fact that I won’t get to see a fully fleshed out Mr. Scott-Silver dynamic is MAJORLY disappointing, let me tell you. That Flint’s actor didn’t somehow get his mother (aka Maggie Smith aka Professor McGonagall aka Lady Violet) on the show too ¬¬. LOL.

Saddest moment: character’s deaths of two of the characters listed on “top 5”/“others you like” xD.

Most well done character death: the hanging in 3x09 was well done and served its purpose.

Favourite guest star: for a value of “guest star”... I’m going with Idelle.

Favourite cast member: Jessica Parker Kennedy is the one that I know and love for other projects she’s done.

Character you wish was still alive: THE ONE WE TRAGICALLY LOST IN 2x09.

One thing you hope really happens: I’m cheating because I know there’s some of that in s4, but I want to watch more Flint/Madi interactions pls.

Most shocking twist: well, I wasn’t spoiled for Mr. Scott’s plot in s3 so I was (pleasantly) surprised by that xD

When did you start watching/reading?: a little over two weeks ago; I watched (devoured) s1-s2 and 3x01-3x04 in a few days because I wanted to meet Madi, and then I tragically had to slow down :(((

Best animal/creature: I will always love Treasure Islands’ parrot that Silver named after Flint LMFAO.

Favourite location: Nassau aka Max’s ~domain xD. And Miranda’s house.

Trope you wish they would stop using: noooooone. I love the tropes this show reuses LMFAO. Romantic Betrayals(TM), triumvirates, “good things happen in the dark/away from civilization”, the power of narratives, social climbing and revolt... bring them oooooon.

One thing this show/book/film does better than others: quite a few xD. But one that really stands out to me is the dialogue; both the ~deep and sorrowful type (there were so many quotes where I had to take a break to freak out properly lol), and the humorous ones.

Funniest moments: I know I’m repeating myself, but I recently rewatched the pilot to edit some scenes and I keep remember the WHO’S BILLY one xDD (which I maintain it was Flint trolling him. He could give Abigail a rundown of Billy’s whole life story AND he shamelessly checked him out that one time. Flint knows who Billy is, he’s just an asshole xD). Really, all the scenes between Billy and Flint in that episode are comedic gold lmfao. Billy’s “oh dear I fucked up” expression when he tells Flint the crew has started to think him weak and Flint looks half a second away from murdering him right there, his WTF face at Flint’s antics with the stolen page... Gold, seriously.

Couple you would like to see: I meannnnnn. I would’ve been very happy if the show had decided to go with Flint/Madi/Silver, for one. Bonus if Miranda could’ve been included. Or just explicit Flint/Silver in poly arrangements (THEY ARE IN LOVE, IT’S JUST ~COMPLICATED XD).

Actor/Actress you want to join the cast: MAGGIE SMITH DAMMIT.

Favourite outfit: literally everything Max wears in s3. Eleanor’s s1-s2 outfits were things I’d love to wear too. Flint’s ~dramatic coat. Miranda’s collection of supposedly-puritan-but-showing-the-goods dresses xDD (and ofc her London clothes), Jack’s clothes (he’s Nassau’s fashion icon lbr).

Favourite item: the books!! Especially when Flint gave Miranda “La Galatea” as a gift (given that sometimes he reminds me of my OC Latoya, you might understand the freakout I had when he gave the other member of my OTP a book titled like that xDD).

Do you own anything related to this show/book/film?: no, but I kinda want to. I did have a Treasure Planet computer game I tragically can’t find... it was about collecting money in increasingly difficult scenarios LOL. And I probably have more pirate-y/Treasure Island theme stuff. I had a long pirate phase xD

What house/team/group/friendship group/family/race etc would you be in?: Max’s because I like being on the winning team, thanks xD (though I do ~align more with Flint and Madi’s lbr...).

Most boring plotline: Eleanor and Vane’s ~romance is not at all badly written... but the fact that I find both of them boring kinda ruins the whole thing because I always wish that time went to someone else xD. Also, Blackbeard. Meh.

Most laughably bad moment: n/a.

Best flashback/flashfoward if any: the London flashback where Miranda goes to Flint’s house unannounced to take him to an art gallery, she finds him half-naked and he gets all awkward about it lmao. And then they hook up in the carriage :DDD

Most layered character: we get to explore Flint and Silver the most. Silver’s development in particular is something that never ceases to impress me ngl.

Most one dimensional character: except the one-note characters I wouldn’t really call anyone completely one-dimensional, tbh. Though I do think the fandom attributes more complexity to Thomas than it’s seen in canon? Like, I like what I see; I think he’s functional, he works well, and he adds wonderfully to Flint’s (and Miranda’s) story, but I don’t see him as a full character in his own right. Which is perfectly fine for the narrative so far, but I fear it might fall apart for me at the very end.

Scariest moment: I never know what to say in this... I mean, I guess Flint killing a man with his bare hands in the pilot Like That was scary xD. I understand why Silver freaked out LOL.

Grossest moment: any of Max’s interactions with Vane tbh. Stay away from her ¬¬

Best looking male: Flint has that ruggedly handsome thing going on for him, if you’re into that (and sometimes I do appreciate his ~aesthetics... very sad he shaved his head in s3 though. Like, I get you did it for the Angst, honey, and trust me, I Feel U, but still). I feel like I might be forgetting someone, but seriously, none of the dudes in this show so far do anything for me LOL. I can honestly say I love them for their personalities xDD

Best looking female: I have a weakness for Max, but Miranda, Madi, Anne, the Maroon Queen, Idelle, Eme... all of them are gorgeous in their own way. This show is good for sapphic women’s enjoyment in that sense xDD.

Who you’re crushing on (if any): I could crush on any of the women mentioned above tbh.

Favourite cast moment: I have literally only seen this post about an interview where Flint’s actor says he’s too old to party with The Youth of the cast and just wants to chill on the weekend... with bonus Max and Eleanor’s actress talking about how Vane’s once climbed the side of a building up AND back down. I’m with you, Toby Stephens, you don’t need those shenanigans xDD

Favourite transportation: the Walrus, for sentimental reasons LOL. I liked stolen Spanish warship too.

Most beautiful scene (scenery/shot wise): lots of good ones, though I think my fave might be the one of Miranda sitting by the window in London. Or the one of Charles Town burning down, I liked that :))) (I remember thinking “Flint better go full Daenerys on them”. And he did! It was nice xD).

Unanswered question/continuity issue/plot error that bugs you: n/a, so far.

Best promo: n/a.

At what point did you fall in love with this show/book: I liked it from the word go, but the moment that TRULY cemented it for me was in 1x03, with Max making a decision that I... frankly didn’t expect. It made things worse for her in the short-term, the storyline itself was difficult and disturbing to watch and I still have some mixed feelings about it. But what it said about her as a character and how her journey goes after that... I was in awe of her, and of the show.

#missbrunettebarbie #replies #my thoughts #black sails #black sails thoughts #talking to the void #bsmax #miranda barlow #james flint #john silver #flintmiranda #silverflintmadi #silverflint #silvermadi #billy x flint #bsmadi #i think those are the most prominent ones #thanks for the ask :D

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notchesandbullets · 3 years

Text

Halloween Special: Caramel Apples and Tricksters [Oneshot] Modern AU (Part 1/2)

Part 1

Words: 4k

(OC from my fanfic: “The Varied Path”)

They had finally fully settled into their new home, and the girls went a little crazy with the decorating, as Halloween was just around the corner. Hand-painted jack-o-lanterns stood guard at the front door, and colorful lights were hung at the front of their mansion.

Inside, every single surface was draped in marigold tablecloths and cinnamon candles burned brightly, the spice wafting through every inch of the house. Garlands were draped over the railings in an artful arrangement of autumn leaves and cranberries. The usual white towels in the bathrooms and the kitchen were replaced with seasonal ones and Zeno added a bit of spooky touches all over the place.

Plastic bats hanging from the ceiling upstairs, a ghost at the foot of the basement stairs, and several well-placed traps so that whenever someone opened up a cupboard, they got a face full of goo launched at their head.

But in a house full of trained agents and spies, it was more fun than anything else to try and dodge the sticky substance.

The leaves had changed shades, indicating the much beloved season transformation by the one and only Calista.

She loved how the forest green gradually transformed into ruby reds and lavish golds, leaves spiraling gently to the ground as the autumn breeze whispered by. It was the season of pumpkin spice, fresh air, apple pie, and warmth that came from sitting by the fireplace with a mug of hot cocoa and homemade chocolate chip cookies.

Hak and Jae-ha had undertaken some projects for the new house when they first moved in during the summer, installing top of the line appliances for the giant kitchen. A huge fridge for Yoon to stock with all sorts of food to feed the hungry bunch of eight, and a state of the art oven complete with a industry standard stovetop.

They had also turned the unfinished, extremely creepy basement into an automated training space. They all used it for shooting practice, hand to hand combat and wrestling.

Kija had repainted nearly all of the rooms in the house, with a little help from Yona and Zeno. While they were doing that, Shin-ah and Calista were busy helping the movers bring all of their stuff inside under the direction of a pretty boy genius barking out commands at the front door.

"You!! Bring that into the kitchen, but watch out for the paint and the tools lying around."

"Don't forget to grab the rugs, those need to go in first before we can put any of this away."

"No— No!! I need this first before you bring in that!!"

"BE CAREFUL WITH THAT, IT'S GLASS YOU IDIOT!!!!!"

Calista chuckled to herself as she carefully maneuvered around the sharp corner from the hallway that led from the foyer. Panting with exertion, she helped Shin-ah move the plush sofa into the living room. They set it down heavily, but luckily Yoon was too far away and too consumed with drilling the movers to hear that they may have scratched his hardwood floors.

Wiping the sweat off of her forehead with the back of her hand, she grinned at the blue-haired man who was scanning around for any boxes that needed unloading in their vicinity. She pushed herself up onto her feet, punching his shoulder good-naturedly when she passed him.

"C'mon, I'll race ya!!"

She broke into a sprint, and he chased after her. Their friends, in various places of the house cracked smiles and shared jokes as they heard the laughter coming from downstairs, knowing that the two must be up to their shenanigans again.

It had been months since then, and everyone had pretty much settled into a rhythm comfortable enough for Calista to hit the stores with Yona long enough without the boys destroying the place.

Hopefully.

The girls picked out just about anything that caught their interest, bringing along Tae-yeon and Hani last minute with Mundok's and Gi-gan's permission. They were the children's respective guardians but it wasn't much of an issue seeing as how they were all family.

Calista had been in the store less than a minute before there was a loud commotion behind her.

Internally wincing, she turned around to see what trouble the children had gotten themselves into this time. But her eyes widened in surprise as she saw five familiar figures, Hani frozen from where she faceplanted into Nier's legs. Tae-yeon was staring up at Tae-jun with big, innocent eyes and Yona smiled sheepishly at Heuk-chi, apologizing to both of them for the collision while the children righted themselves.

The guardian brushed it off, his unofficial bodyguard going along with him. If she didn't know any better, Calista would say that the tall man was blushing badly in the presence of the sweet redhead. But she chose not to comment on it as Hani and Tae-yeon ran back to her, wanting to spare her friend any embarrassment.

"We weren't expecting to see you guys until later tonight." Calista pitched in, ruffling the children's hair as she directed her attention past the triplets. "We're getting some stuff for later on, want to come with?"

With an eager, mutual agreement to join forces, the huge and rambunctious group of nine browsed the aisles of the store, buying way more than they should have with the children throwing things in the cart more than would've been allowed if any real adults were present.

Tae-jun didn't count, he caved every time Opal turned his watery eyes on him and Calista cursed her spinelessness, giving in just as bad when it came to her youngest brother and the golden-haired, little girl.

Squeals echoed off of the shelves and she whipped around as the triplets and the younger two pulled a huge cake out from the bakery section.

"Oh no, absolutely not." Calista held up her hand, averting her gaze from their puppy eyes. "Yoon will throw a fit if he sees this."

"But Notch~" Opal whined. "Please!!"

His brothers chorused their persuasion and while she had to admit it was sort of endearing seeing the fifteen-year-old boys beg for permission to buy a ridiculously humongous treat, she redirected their efforts towards a panicking Tae-jun beside her.

There wasn't any way she would be able to hold up against all five of them if they continued, she barely had enough strength to resist Hani's puppy dog eyes.

But once she turned her gaze on her youngest brother and saw how Tae-yeon's lower lip trembled dangerously, she sped to his side, dropping down on her knees, ignoring how harshly she landed on them in her haste.

"Tae-yeon," Her soft voice broke as desperation seeped through, gripping his shoulders gently in an effort to convey how bad of an idea this was. "Gramps is gonna kill me."

He beamed up at her, tears suddenly vanishing. "No, he loves you, remember?"

Calista's eyes rounded pathetically at that and she coughed to cover it up.

"Alright, fine." She finally surrendered, throwing up her hands.

Their shrieks of excitement and victory shattered any semblance of silence in the marketplace and she winced at their volume, shaking her head in amusement as they rushed to shove it in the already crammed shopping cart.

Yona drifted over to her side, clasping her hands behind her back playfully.

"You caved~" The redhead sang, giggling.

A fond smile made its way onto the older girl's face, gazing after them as they disappeared around the corner with a worried Tae-jun hot on their tail to make sure they didn't get lost. Or end up causing chaos that couldn't be contained by the mere mention of his title.

Chuckling, Calista began pushing the cart to follow after them. "I always do..."

After numerous attempts to convince their temporary guardians to buy them all the snacks they wanted, five failed chances taken to sneak electronics into the cart and two feeble efforts to buy candy bars at the checkout lane, Calista, Yona, and all the others finally left the supermarket.

Though they were armed to the teeth with food and amenities for later that night.

They hopped into their separate cars, but Tae-jun followed them back to the house so the triplets could spend some more time with Calista.

Kicking open the door with one foot, the raven-haired girl yelled out that they were back as the three troublemakers along with Tae-yeon and Hani shot past her, vanishing from her view within seconds.

She had just set down the groceries and supplies on the floor when she heard two loud crashes come from upstairs and the kitchen at the same time an outraged cry reached her ears.

"Are you all alright?!" Calista shouted out as she untied her shoes and gathered up the food that needed to be refrigerated.

A chorus of reassurances were screamed back and she chuckled to herself, nudging the door with her foot to close it. She had a feeling Yoon would take care of whatever that was all about. Jae-ha appeared at the base of the stairs in a flash, paint in his hair.

She stifled a laugh that bubbled up, opting for a wild gesture that could have been interpreted as anything. But judging by the chuckle and the hand that was raised to wipe the excess away for the time being, he knew what she was getting at.

"Do I want to know?" She teased the eldest, handing him two of the larger bags.

Jae-ha's violet eyes crinkled at her ask, a smirk curling at the edge of his mouth. "Maybe not, my dear."

The pair made their way into the kitchen, both lifting an eyebrow at the pristine state. They glanced at each other and then shrugged. Yoon must have cleaned up whatever was spilled already, he couldn't stand the messes.

Zeno and Hak were sitting in the family room, crowded around some sort of card game, roping Heuk-chi into it the moment he passed by. A movie was playing in the background, but no one was paying attention to it. Some sort of Disney film that Calista knew Hak had put on for the kids after he was alerted of their impromptu meeting at the store.

Good thing she had sent him that text.

She had asked him to clean up the house and rid it of any exposed weapons when they ran into Tae-jun and the triplets in the store, having a suspicion that they were going to tag along all the way back to the house.

The night before, she was cleaning her knives and reassembling her sniper rifle. She hadn't gotten a chance to put it away, believing she had enough time before they were set to come over. Knowing her brother though, he had tossed them all on her bed without a second thought. It didn't matter, just as long as the children didn't see them.

It wasn't like they weren't aware of it, but in their line of work, they were better protected the less they were exposed to their lifestyle.

In tandem, the green-haired man and the raven-haired girl began to put away the various food items, Jae-ha automatically taking over the fridge and Calista the pantry. However, she dropped what she was doing the instant she heard a small cough.

Clicking her tongue in worry, she hurriedly filled a cup with water, handing it to Tae-yeon, who had just sprinted into the vicinity with Hani right behind him.

He coughed again as he tried to drink it too fast and she hushed him.

"Smaller sips, Tae-yeon. There you go..." Calista encouraged him quietly, masking her concern so that she didn't accidentally scare him.

Eventually, his breathing steadied and she was less panicked than before.

Patting him on the head gently, she asked, "Did you need your medicine? Are you sure you're alright?"

He nodded cutely, raising the cup above his head in an attempt to put it in the sink but he was struggling. His older sister watched him for a moment, letting him try for himself. But he couldn't do it and after another minute of struggling, he reluctantly asked her if she could do it for him.

Hani hopped up and down on her little feet, golden hair bouncing with her as Calista set it down in the sink. "Yeonie, Yeonie, Yeonie, come and meet my pet ladybug!! She's outside!!"

His eyes lit up and Calista was left alone as the kids shot off.

"Wait!!" She called after them worriedly, starting after them as they slid open the glass door leading to the backyard. "Both of you be careful please!!"

"Relax, Calista dear, they'll be fine." Jae-ha reassured her as he put the milk and the giant cake away in the fridge.

Hak was weird, he only ate bakery if it was cold and Yona made sure to call him out on it more than once.

Calista snorted, hesitating for a beat before giving in, knowing he was right. "Only if someone's watching them to make sure they don't accidentally get in trouble like last time."

Jae-ha shook his head slightly, eyes filled with light humor. "They're on our property. What could possibly happen?"

Once, Kija had mistakenly left the two children alone with the triplets, and somehow the five of them managed to land themselves in a police station within the hour. Something about escaped shelter animals and a raid on a corner store with a stereo. She couldn't even make sense of the police report when they had given it to her, and now she just knew better than to ask.

"Hak—"

"I'm on it." He interrupted his sister, already halfway out the door that led to the acres of open land naturally fenced by several hundred-year-old trees. Zeno skipped cheerily after him, closing the door behind him to conserve the heat inside.

Following his younger brother in order to make sure his allergies didn't act up due to his weak lungs, Hak grabbed a spare rake from the shed in the back. He might as well do this now so that he didn't have to do it tomorrow, plus it would make the lawn easier to mow later on. Zeno took the smaller one to help after he played games with Tae-yeon while Hani went to look for her tiny friend.

They raked all the fallen leaves into a huge pile.

But the second Hak turned his back, he heard a yell of, "Cannonball!!", and in came the pitter-patter of small feet shaking the earth.

He let out a shout at the wave of dead leaves that he had just collected showered over him. Spitting out the ones that landed in his mouth, he glared in mock annoyance at his sheepish brother and the delighted golden-haired girl beside him. Zeno threw up his hands, having dived in with the children and sent another torrent of leaves up in the air, beaming widely.

"Mister!! Come on in!!"

Hak shrugged, tossing aside the rake as he sprinted towards them. Work would have to wait.

Hani and Tae-yeon shrieked as he leaped and clumsily scattered about, thoroughly diminishing all of his hard work. But he couldn't bring himself to care as he began to chase them around in a spontaneous game of tag.

Zeno sat on the ground with his legs crossed in front of him, scarf bundled up to his nose as a chilly wind blew by. "Zeno wants the little miss to win!!"

"But what about me?" Tae-yeon whined with big eyes, doubling over in a fit of giggles as Hak scooped him up, tickling his stomach. "Hak— hehe!! Stop!!"

His big brother didn't let up until Hani tackled him with a warrior cry, latching her tiny arms around his neck to get him off of her friend. Hak stood up with a loud but playful roar, chasing the two around the empty field until all of them collapsed in a fit of ringing laughter.

Hours passed before the four reentered into the house, teeth chattering with the need for a hot beverage.

Jae-ha had disappeared back upstairs. Something about a project with Kija and Yona that he had yet to complete. But Calista was still in the kitchen, and now so was Yoon.

Calista told the freezing bunch to go change into something warmer so that they didn't catch a cold and instructed her brother to sift through her closet to find spare jackets for the little ones. While he was busy doing that, she gathered what she needed to make them something hot so that they could warm up on the inside.

Coffee for Hak, and hot chocolate for the kids and Zeno.

Helping the small children onto the kitchen stools on the opposite side of the island where Yoon was at so that they didn't accidentally get in his way, Calista made sure they weren't going to fall off but guiding them to first blow on their hot chocolate before taking a small sip. Things wouldn't go well for the rest of the evening if they burned their tongues while attempting to chug the drink.

Hani swung her feet playfully, emerald eyes eager as she reached for the liquid chocolate.

Pulling back her hand that held the steaming, small mug, Calista stared at her intently. "Drink it slowly, okay, little one?"

She nodded enthusiastically, making grabby hands for it. The older girl finally handed it over, watching her carefully for a minute to make sure she was being careful. The little girl had a history of being too hurried that had unfortunate consequences.

Three sets of footsteps could be heard from the second floor as the triplets ran down the stairs, skidding to a halt once they reached the kitchen, resembling dominoes as Nier crashed into Opal and Yue crashed into his brothers. They fell into a heap on the carpeted floor, with a very winded Tae-jun trailing after them.

Stifling a giggle as the energetic boys sprang back up, she clapped a hand over her mouth as the sound escaped nonetheless and she was faced with three playful brooding looks.

"I didn't do anything." Calista claimed, shrieking and then breaking into a run the second she saw the look in their eyes.

"Get her!!!" Opal screamed, chasing her through the house with his brothers hot on his tail.

"Wait what?! Why me?!?!" She yelled over her shoulder, weaving in and out of the corridors at a breaknecking speed.

Dodging the sharp corner that separated the living room and the foyer, she twisted and turned throughout the extensive first floor of the house. Her memorization of every nook and cranny came in handy. They stumbled after her, not quite as fluent in the layout as she was, eventually giving up and declaring her victory.

"Marshy!!" Calista yelled, completely out of breath, resting her hands on her knees. "When's Gramps coming over?"

Hak checked his watch, keeping Yona at bay with the other hand as he held her out at arms length. They were playing a game of charades with Opal and Yue since Nier declined to have anything to do with lifting a finger after that exhausting chase through the house.

"In an hour." He answered her leisurely, a smirk of amusement stretching across his features as the redhead puffed out her cheeks in frustration. "Yoon, what's for dinner?"

"Hold your horses, you rare beasts!!" Yoon shouted over his shoulder, bustling around the massive kitchen, doing a hundred things at once.

Peering over the kitchen island, Calista tapped on his shoulder when she saw a pause in his purposeful stride.

"Anything I can do to help?" She offered.

She was a complete klutz in the kitchen, but she still wanted to be there for him so that he wasn't so stressed. Still, she wasn't sure if she brought anything to the table. What could a genius pretty boy possibly need from a clumsy girl like her?

Calista could barely keep track of Tae-yeon and Hani as they skipped around, their tiny heads bobbing into view every time one of them got too excited and started jumping up and down.

Yoon never got a chance to answer her as he saw her speed towards the door the second she heard it ring.

Throwing it open, Calista was surprised to find Gi-gan standing on the other side instead of Mundok. Nevertheless, she quickly invited her inside so that the elder woman was out of the cold.

"Would you like some tea?" She offered, taking her coat off and hanging it up for her on the antique coat rack Yona got from a thrift shop. "Is it that time already?"

Gi-gan rubbed her hands together in an effort to get the blood flowing again, sending the raven-haired girl a rare warm smile. "No, no, not yet. The little ones are going trick-or-treating later, yes? Tea sounds wonderful, girl. Thank you."

Flashing her a grin, she led her into the family room filled with laughter and all sorts of shenanigans.

Jae-ha stood up immediately, greeting his old guardian with a trademark, suggestive remark that had the elder smacking him upside the head for his language.

"I didn't teach you that, you brat." Gi-gan fired at him mercilessly.

Simply smiling, Jae-ha dodged the second blow aimed at his head, green ponytail streaming behind him as he escaped her. "Now, Captain, you wouldn't want to scratch a face this beautiful, would you?"

"You overestimate your beauty."

The offended gasp at the flat retort had everyone dying of laughter.

As Calista caught her breath, she boiled some water, gaze drifting to a mop of golden hair that came bounding up to her hopefully. Steering Hani away from the stove so that she didn't accidentally burn herself like last time she got too close, she crouched down to the little girl's level, who now was avoiding her gaze.

"Hey... what's the matter, little one?"

Hani pouted slightly, emerald orbs rounding as she exclaimed, "Can we make caramel apples?"

Chuckling, Calista pushed herself up and held out her hand. The golden-haired girl eagerly took it, pulling out the apples from the fridge as the older one fetched the caramel dip from the pantry.

"Guys!!" She shouted over the noise of their heated game of monopoly. "We're making caramel apples if you want to join!!"

"Not now, Bat-Ears!!" Hak fired back. "I'm just about to win!!"

Rolling her eyes, a crafty smile played upon her lips. "He's cheating."

"I KNEW IT!!!!!" Kija yelled, bolting up.

"Zeno wanted to join!!"

Jae-ha smoothly got to his feet as the two went head to head, whisking Tae-yeon away from the chaotic scene while the two of them bickered over who was right, the triplets egging on the grown men without any hesitation.

Tae-jun was lounging on the couch with Heuk-chi, flipping through the channels on the TV, trying to ignore the massive headache he had coming on.

Swiftly turning off the fire as the kettle began to whistle, Calista placed some jasmine tea leaves in a porcelain cup, leaving it alone to steep for a couple of minutes. Jae-ha and Yona had been the ones to convince Hak they needed nice silverware and fine china. Her idiot-of-a-brother was going to buy plastic utensils and plates from the dollar tree for crying out loud!

She set it down silently on the end table next to Gi-gan, trying not to disturb her.

Yona and Gi-gan were engaged in a casual conversation while the rest of them dipped fuji apples in smooth caramel, placing the finished but messy treats on a parchment paper lined tray so that the taffy treat could set.

The children eagerly waited by the countertop, much too hyper to eat one to even think about sitting down.

Calista gave up trying to pry them away from the island, leaving them to do whatever they wanted now that Yoon was finished making dinner and the kitchen was no longer that hazardous. Collapsing on a velvet chair, she sprawled herself out lazily, done moving for the rest of the day.

Her eyebrows drew together in confusion as she heard the doorbell ring, but sat up with a groan and ran to answer it when no one else got up.

It wasn't even five yet and people were already trick-or-treating?! Unbelievable.

Flinging open the door to give whoever was on the other side a piece of her mind, all words died on her tongue when cropped, blue hair flashed into view. She clapped a hand over her mouth in shock, taking in the signature red marks decorating his cheekbones and those piercing, golden eyes.

Calista choked on air, tears pricking at the back of her eyes.

"Shin-ah?"

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that-fannerd-with-the-glasses · 4 years

Text

Huhh so, here’s some general characterization/fun fact things for Incredibles AU!! I usually don’t post this kinda stuff but since I’m still working on chapter three, figured I might as well!

Phoenix (36), Mr. Incredible/Bob Parr counterpart

Superpower is super strength

Superhero name is Captain Indestructible.

Didn’t really start to realize his powers until late in high school, though he didn’t actually begin superhero work until he was in college. Mia was one of his professors and she ended up eventually catching on to his abilities and offered to be his mentor (as she’s also a super). They worked as a team together up until the point Mia was killed in a severe incident, from that point on Phoenix ended up working alone. He did end up taking Maya under his wing since she was supposed to train with Mia before she died, though she eventually branched out on her own as well.

Was an art major, and had plans of mainly working from home as a freelance artist.

He really does try to be a good dad, okay, and he fucking loves his kids. It’s not his fault that every job the government’s placed him sucks the life and willpower out of him. He studied art dammit, being stuck at a desk job selling insurance was his worst nightmare come true.

Was in peak shape during his hero days, but years of being hunched over at a desk and little to no exercise--not to mention poor eating habits ended up developing into a soft dad bod that he’s a tad insecure about.

Meets up with Maya once or twice during the week, they usually end up getting burgers and reminiscing about the old days together.

Tried so hard to forget about hero work and live a normal steady life with his family, but that’s easier said than done. His entire den at home is decorated with all sorts of posters and articles and lately, he’s been spending just a bit too much time in it.

He’s already blown cover on their family twice, and he’s so torn between wanting to stay put and wanting to resume hero work.

Miles (36), Elastigirl/Helen Parr counterpart

Superpower is elasticity.

Superhero name is Flexuous.

Has been dealing with his powers pretty much since childhood. After his parents died, he was taken in by Manfred Von Karma and trained to be his prodigy.

He ended up breaking away from Von Karma’s teachings sometime later and tried to do hero work on his own, his first instance of this being when he and Phoenix met for the first time. For a while they actually were rivals, before becoming friends and eventually dating, and were far too amused by the media’s obsession with their supposed rivalry.

Was studying to obtain a law degree and had hopes of becoming a lawyer, but when the lawsuits started happening and superheros were all uprooted, he ended up having to abandon any hopes of having any sort of high profile career.

Sometimes works as a legal mediator just to make a bit of extra money/put his law knowledge to good use.

He is the true backbone of the Edgeworth-Wright household. It would be in shambles if he weren’t in charge of it, as hair pulling as such a task is. For some years he and Phoenix co-parented without a problem, but with middle age starting to settle and Phoenix delving into a midlife crisis, he’s more or less been having to manage things on his own.

Phoenix and Miles -

They formally met through a foreign language course they were both taking, though officially had actually met several times under their super personas. It didn’t take long for either of them to figure each other’s identities out, however.

By the media’s standards, Captain Indestructible and Flexuous were rivals to one another, which up until a point was true. When they started dating, however, the rivalry all became a pretense just for the public’s entertainment. Though that wasn’t to say their butting heads and bickering outside of their super suits wasn’t all real, because it very much was.

They dated for about two years before they were engaged, but their wedding had to be put on hold due to all the lawsuits and Super-related scandals going on.

Miles pretty much planned his and Phoenix’s wedding up to a T, which didn’t matter in the end since they couldn’t afford the venue they’d wanted. They tried to wait a while, so they could save up enough money but that didn’t work out, and thus they decided to just go ahead and have a small private ceremony at the local courthouse.

Phoenix knows Miles will never admit it, but he’s heartbroken that they didn’t get to have the wedding they wanted, especially after all the effort he put into it. That and the venue they’d booked was where his parents had gotten married, it’d meant so much to him to have their wedding there and they didn’t get to do that.

They made the promise to each other that someday, when they were more financially stable, that they’d renew their vows and have the ceremony they’d always wanted, however that’s easier said than done when you’re trying to pay off bills and raise three kids.

Adopted Apollo two years into their marriage, then Athena a few years after that, and just recently have adopted Trucy.

Apollo (14), Violet Parr counterpart

Superpower is invisibility/force fields.

The oldest child of the Edgeworth-Wright family.

Has a crush on Klavier, who’s one of the more popular students in school because of course he is.

Struggles with having to keep his powers a secret, which in-turn causes a great deal of self doubt.

Enjoys classic literature and music.

Is stressed 24/7. His family is weird and he just wants to be normal, please help him.

Athena (10), Dash Parr counterpart

Superpower is super speed.

The middle child of the Edgeworth-Wright family.

Her biological mother was also a super, who was killed by an ex-villain. Something similar happened to Miles when he was young, so of course he was all for adopting her.

She has way too much energy for her own good, and has trouble focusing on one thing at a time. Her parents have tried time and time again to find a proper outlet for her to take her energy out on, but nothing’s worked so far and has only resulted in multiple visits to the principal’s office.

She wants so badly to play sports and has begged her parents time and time again to let her try out for one of the teams, though this usually ends in disagreement. Miles will put his foot down over the fear of her having an unfair advantage due to her powers, while Phoenix wants nothing more than to let her go ahead and do it.

She very much loves and cares for her siblings, even if she does tend to pick on Apollo sometimes.

Trucy (11 months old), Jack Jack Parr counterpart

Superpower is transformation, but the rest of her family doesn’t know this yet shhhh.

The youngest child of the Edgeworth-Wright family.

She was an urgent emergency adoption, as well as being a closed one, so not much is known about her birth family.

Maya (30), Frozone/Lucius Best counterpart

Superpower is telepathy/telekinesis.

Every woman in her family ended up developing these sorts of powers one way or another, so when hers started to get out of control she confided in Mia and was promised help in the matter. When she did finally arrive in the city though, Mia was dead so Phoenix took over the whole mentor thing, even if admittedly he wasn’t very good at it.

Despite everything, with Phoenix knowing next to nothing about Maya’s sort of power, he really tried his best to be of help to her and they ended up becoming close friends, even when she went off to do hero work on her own.

After the superhero relocation program went into effect, she started work as a medium as a low key means of using her powers without giving herself away. She now owns her own small “mystic elements” type of shop where she does palm readings and the like, though nothing too drastic since a full display of her powers would give her away and have her relocated.

Has never once been relocated come to think of it, and Phoenix is kind of jealous. It helps that she can be more subdued about her powers, while he doesn’t really have that option.

Pearl lives with her and works in the shop as well. She ran away from home several years ago after a fight with her mother and Maya’s been looking after her ever since.

Is the cool, eccentric aunt to Phoenix and Miles’ kids. She or Pearl are their go-to whenever they need a babysitter (since they can’t actually afford one lmao).

Franziska (33), Edna Mode counterpart

Has no superpowers.

Works in the fashion industry, used to be responsible for a lot of super’s suits before the whole lawsuits and relocation shit went down.

The adoptive sister of Miles, who at one point was incredibly resentful towards him due to their father paying him more attention than her due to his having powers. They’ve both made peace since then, on the account that their father sucks.

Before Phoenix had met her, he was wearing his own homemade suit which she absolutely tore to shreds upon seeing. Ever since that day, he’s been low key terrified of her.

Is essentially that wealthy lesbian aunt who likes to show off around Christmas and dump expensive presents on her nieces and nephew.

Travels around a lot due to her job, so she’s not around often.

Dick Gumshoe (45), Rick Dicker counterpart

Has no superpowers.

Works with the whole Agency that regulates supers and what not, personally made sure that he’d be both Phoenix and Miles’ assigned case worker since he’d already known them a while.

Is doing his best in a crappy situation. Personally if you asked him, he’d be fine with supers coming out of their forced retirement but he’s not able to do much about it in his position. Regardless, he’s still a valued family friend and the kids love it when he visits.

Is married to Maggey Byrde because its what he deserves.

Dahlia Hawthorne (32), Syndrome counterpart

Has no superpowers so to speak, but instead relies on technology invented by her family’s company.

She and Phoenix crossed paths during a supers convention, where she tried to convince him to train her as well, going on and on about how she wanted to be a hero too. But seeing as she didn’t actually have powers and wasn’t a hero herself, he turned her down.

The first attempt wasn’t the last, as she tried time and time again to get his attention and get her to train him, and each time he would refuse. He admired her efforts but the fact was, she was a civilian and even with her technology, she could be seriously hurt.

Inadvertently foiled his attempts to sabotage a villain that ended up causing a railway explosion. She was arrested afterwards for interference with hero work, and Phoenix didn’t see her again for a long time.

Took Phoenix’s rejection very personally, and holds her public humiliation towards her arrest as his fault.

Moved away to the island after she got out of jail and spent the next several years building up a brand new company from the ground up as part of her revenge plot.

Iris Hawthorne (32), Mirage counterpart

Has no superpowers.

Is the twin sister of Dahlia.

She took on many of the company responsibilities until Dahlia was released from jail, then was forced into being her assistant for the new company.

#a lot of this stuff may be subject to change since #y'know #this fic IS a wip and all #but uhhhh #yeah idk #ace attorney #incredibles au

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ladypyb · 4 years

Text

Snowballing Into The Heart

Rating: T (for a little bit of cursing)

Relationship/s: USUK, Brotherly AmeCan

Tags: hetaliaxmasevent, Cardverse, Meet-Cute (First Meetings), and a lot of snow XDD

Day 4 of HetaliaXmasEvent: Snowball fight | Skiing | Christmas without snow

|ao3|

(Ooohh man, it’s past midnight in my place. XDD I hope you enjoy it!!!)

In hindsight, Matthew shouldn't have gone to fetch a towel and leave him, the Prince of Spades, bored and alone near the Mages' Tower. He should have just called a servant.

Time passed onwards, as usual, its pace made Alfred wonder if they have the capability to change it. How curious it made him. And how desperate he was to hurry for the warmer days.

The prince liked winter. He didn't hate it. He didn't like like it, either. This was when the power of their kingdom had significant growth, after all. But Alfred didn't love the long cold nights in the season. He didn't outright adore the fact that he had to wear multiple, thick woolen jackets and heat-producing amulets that hinder his movement and stealth. Not to mention the tales about the cold season his mother told him in his childhood. Bad things happen to everyone in winter. Terribly bad things. Brrr!

He liked the powdery snow, though. Its color and often ethereal shine made the scenery look so pure. The dusting they made on the landscapes made him grin and jump into the freezing powder.

It itched him to jump in right now. Anything to go distract himself while Matthew began narrating to him the activities he had for the day. Often, he found his brother's tone monotonous when in duty. No, definitely not 'often' but 'always'. Yes, that's the right word.

"Remember not to touch anything, you might get a curse for even holding a pen that isn't yours. Don't stray away from the floating white lamps and proceed to the violets, the Head Mage told me the young fae tend to use play-magic there. Mother would kill both of us if you tried to pick a fight with one of the mages-"

Bla Bla Bla. The prince slumped against the cold brick of the wall, crossing his arms. What was the point of visiting the Magicians' Wing if they weren't even allowed to enter their laboratories? What was the goal of even doing biannual safety procedures with Alfred, the future King of Spades, if he wasn't the one doing the procedures?

In his head, his mother would definitely reply to him in her babytalk: "Aw, sugarplum, you are only needed to show your face and let the mages do the rest of the checking. It's theirs, after all. You wouldn't want to ruin their threshold and be painted as the villain, would you?"

... Yeah... Listening to Matthew's nagging would be better than their mother's overly-sweet babytalk. Both were sadistic in their own way but his brother's words were blunt, unlike the queen's underlying threats.

"-To stop... Are you listening to me, Al?"

He groaned in his head. "Yeah, I was." No, he definitely wasn't. "How about this tower?" Alfred gestured to the one behind him but kept his eyes on the soft, beckoning snow at their feet. Hmm... He looked up to his brother so quickly he felt his neck crack a bit. "Can we at least have permission to rest in somewhere warm rather than in their freezing gardens?" The garden wasn't biting in the least. He wore a heating amulet and multiple coats, Alfred was warm to the core and sweating inside his personal sauna.

Distract him, distract him, distract him. Alfred recited like a mantra in his head as he slowly crouched down to the soft ground, his eyes on his brother. As Matthew blinked at the tower's structure, the prince started to fist a ball of snow in his leather gloves.

Matthew studied the tower, contemplating. It was smaller than the other buildings on the property. The tower must be a storage room. The lights shining behind the elaborately framed windows stated otherwise, though.

"I don't know, Al. There might be someone important residing in the- Oomph!"

Something wooshed in the air! A cold and soft object hit the side of his jaw. Matthew paused and stared at the sitting and grinning person in front that was his brother. A snowball. Alfred hit him with a snowball. The prince guffawed heartily at his brother's expression of Thou-hast-betrayed-me-brother. Matthew's wide eyes turned into slits. This unbelievably childish tool-

Matthew bent low, scooped a handful of snow and-

"Hahahaha- Fwah!"

Bullseye into Alfred's mouth. Matthew smirked when the other began 'blech!'-ing and 'pswooh!'-ing out the melting snow out of his mouth. Heh, you aren't the only one who can throw snowballs, Alfred!

The blue-eyed prince stared at the violet-eyed ace with a sly look in his face. "You're on!"

Alfred scrambled onto the ground, embracing and creating a mound out of snow. He cupped a fistful and rotated it in his hands. He glanced back at his brother, crap, he's on his third ball! The prince started to quickly fist and cup the snow. The mound in front of him waned to his fear of losing.

No time! Alfred sprang to his feet and threw a snowball at his brother. On the face! Grunting, Matthew frowned and fired back at him. The prince dodged to the side as it almost hit his prized family jewels down below. Matthew cackled. Oh, man, this was war. A man doesn't aim for another guy's most sensitive area!

Then came the onslaught of the balls of snow. Missed and badly-aimed snowballs hit the walls, the hall near the entrance, and the plants carefully maintained in the garden. Bushes cracked and broke to the strength of their blows.

Passing servants and apprentices of mages paid them no mind as they passed by. It was no secret that both men in the royal family often behaved like children when they thought no one was looking. A few frowned at their display when they hit a third party, these occurrences were followed by a distracted 'Sorry!'.

Their roughhousing with the snow ended with a grand snowball from the prince to his brother on the stomach, sending poor Matthew falling on his back. Alfred fell to his knees, a goofy smile on his face in his triumph. He fell forward in exhaustion. Afterward, he moved to his side, panting.

Matthew managed to only hit him on his jaw and legs. Alfred hit him everywhere on his body with the help of his overzealous need to win every challenge and interest that crosses his path.

Matthew shuffled to stand, the other raised a brow at him, disbelieving. Alfred gave it all he had, ended up on the ground last and Matthew still stood up? What gives? He whined.

"Oh, don't be a baby. Stand up, you'll catch a cold." Matthew held his hand out to his brother which Alfred accepted. "Ugh," Matthew brushed off his clothes with his free hand, "I'm dripping. I'll never doubt these amulets, again."

Alfred flailed his arms like a dog, droplets flung everywhere. "Looks like it. Let's go ask for towels."

The older and logical of the two watched the other suspiciously. "No. You'll most likely slip away somewhere and get lost- "

"Impossible! I don't get lost."

"-Or cause some mischief on the way." Matthew crossed his arms, firm.

Alfred wiped his brow. "So are both just going to stand here? Baiting the cold and die of pneumonia?"

The ace pursed his lips. He clicked his tongue. "Fine," Alfred cheers at this, " But I'll fetch the towels. You," he gestured at Alfred, "Stay here."

The other pouted and kicked the accumulating snow below. Matthew enters into the open doors of the hallway. "Aww c'mon, Matt!"

"Don't. Go. Anywhere." The ace commanded as he eyed Alfred and continued down the hall.

Alfred clicked his tongue childishly. So what if he'd stray away from the directions sometimes, it wasn't like he'd easily die! The blessings from their clocks prevented that.

... He did oftentimes find himself suffering from a curse or two, managed to almost get assassinated, have been on the verge of death more than five times, and have been poisoned while eating street food. But Alfred survived!

He could almost hear Yao, the Jack, mumble beside his mother while tending his wounds or whatever harm he was inflicted, "With the amount of curiosity, and stubbornness you are born with, I could only pray to the Maker your rule would be as peaceful as it can be."

Alfred sighed, looking up he traced the flying bird overhead. The feathered animal circled the garden and perched atop a small roof of a window sill of the tower. He wished he was as free as the bird, free to go anywhere and able to do what he pleased.

He observed the little bird, bright orange stomach- A robin! How strange, robin birds weren't native to Spades, especially in one of Spades' northern areas. Alfred moved to spy under the windowsill, it was a few feet above his head but nothing could stop him.

When he craned his neck to observe the bird, he noticed a messy mop of golden hair near the windowpane. Someone was there- Oh Blessed Time!

Alfred ducked and made himself be one with the wall behind him. The windows opened with a clank! and the snow sprinkled on the prince's nose. His nostrils tickled. Ah- He wants to sneeze! Alfred pressed his tongue to the roof of his mouth.

"-Damned pests. No wonder the potion did nothing! I should have known they'd place it in the wrong flask."

An accented voice of a man. It was so light and deep at the same time, it made Alfred wonder if the man swallowed a piccolo and a bass at the same time.

Light thumps and a resonating clink. "... What in the name of Time happened here?" The mystery man groaned. "Those freshmen! I can't believe- My roses!" The man stomped away from the window. The sound of heavy steps receded with a bang from a door.

The prince released a breath he was holding. That was so close. If the guy looked down, he'd see Alfred's nose and furred boots. He moved away from the wall. Finally able to ogle freely, he found two open flasks filled with mysterious liquids. One was changing colors rapidly while the other alternated between gold and silver.

The robin from before chirped and fluttered its wings. Oh no. Don't tell him the bird wants to- It glided down unto the windowsill with the two very open and unmistakably dangerous flasks.

"Oh, damn it!"

Alfred scrambled and raised his foot on the side of the brick wall. His gloved hands gripped the windowsill noisily, the robin squawked at him. The prince grunted as he set his elbows down near the flasks, he faced the bird's screeching. He shooed the orange robin with a dismissive hand.

It flapped its wings and nearly bit off his ears as it flew away from him and the flasks. He liked birds but he didn't like them mutated or dead.

Alfred banged his head and resisted to groan at the ridiculousness of his situation. His top half was rested atop a mage's windowsill in an effort to avoid an unwanted experiment. He didn't even know exactly why he ducked to be seen by one mage when didn't even bother to care for his image while playing in the snow with his brother.

He shifted an annoyed glance to the strange fluids. With their swirling and changing of colors, he thinks of them to be potions. They certainly resembled like potions. He sniffed at both of their opening; butter, lilies, and peach. Yep, definitely potions. There was no way liquids could change colors with just these ingredients.

"Hey! You there!" The same accented voice shouted below him. "What are you doing?"

There was disapproval in the voice. Alfred seemed reluctant to look at the man scolding him. He has had enough of it today! Alfred prevented a bird from destroying your potions. The prince turned his head to glare at the man, a scowl on his face.

Eh? His scorned expression dissipated into a daze.

Bright green eyes that were the shade of grass in summer framed by spun gold locks stood out from the man's white robe and soft snowy landscape. The guy had half of his face overrun with caterpillars- Wait, no. He just had large eyebrows. Surprisingly, it made the other look distinguished.

This guy must be the mage! The mage furrowed his brows and growled something Alfred couldn't hear. He raised his brow in confusion and held unto the sill with only an arm as the handsome man gestured his arm aimlessly... at Alfred?

What was he- Whack! Alfred's hold on the windowsill slipped.

"Aaaaaa- oof!" He crashed down on his back. Groaning, he placed his hand on his chest. Fragments of a snowball began melting to the power of the amulet under his coat. The dull pain that throbbed in his chest was nothing to the sharpness of blow to the side of his head. Did he hit his head when he fell...?

The mage's face swam into his blurry view. The expression of the mage full of concern was badly hidden through the annoyed curve of his lips. Alfred decided the guy was adorably handsome.

"... Are... kay... ?"

"Hn."

The green-eyed beauty touched his cheek. The prince moved into the chilled fingers. Aaah. He felt hot and cold at the same time.

"Hold... I... get... elp."

The angel's face blurred. Huh, did... Did Alfred lose his glasses when he fell?

He tried to focus on the other's fretting on him. Alfred's eyes closed, losing its strength to even move an eyelid. Darkness swallowed him and his consciousness.

Hm. It seems the Cupid from Hearts shot him in the chest with a snowball, instead of an arrow.

//end

#hetaliaxmasevent #hetalia #hetalia fanfiction #my fanfic #slightly usuk #usuk #brotherly bonding through fighting AmeCan #snowballs #a little magic #cardverse #meet cute #first meeting #APH America #hws america #APH England #hws england #APH Canada #hws canada #snowball fights

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tabloidtoc · 4 years

Text

Life & Style, May 4

Cover: Rob Lowe -- Fame Almost Killed Me

Page 1: Photo Flash -- Demi Lovato for Harper’s Bazaar

Page 2: Contents

Page 4: The Top 10 Lucy Hale Looks

Page 6: Twinning -- Nicky Hilton vs. Rachel Brosnahan ✅, Claire Foy vs. Maya Rudolph ✅, Phoebe Tonkin ✅ vs. Margot Robbie

Page 8: Lori Loughlin going to jail for 10 years because her attempt to get a judge to drop all charges related to the college admissions cheating scandal backfired in a big way when federal prosecutors released photos of her daughters on rowing machines as well as emails sent by her husband Mossimo Giannulli seemingly laughing about their crimes

Page 9: Kim Kardashian is desperate to get in Meghan Markle’s good graces so she asked mutual friend Serena Williams to schedule a meeting but Meghan doesn’t want anything to do with that family -- Serena thinks Meghan is being silly and rude and it’s put a strain on their friendship, Throwback -- Stephen Colbert, Biggest Spenders of the Week -- David and Victoria Beckham, Kylie Jenner, Amal and George Clooney, Tyler Perry, Ana de Armas

Page 10: Ellen Pompeo is trading in her Grey’s Anatomy scrubs for some dancing shoes -- she’s been trying to do a dance competition show for years and now it’s turned into a docuseries with RuPaul and choreographer Yanis Marshall, after taking a years break from the dating scene Selena Gomez is ready to find love again and she’s asked Taylor Swift to help

Page 12: Alicia Silverstone was well on her way to becoming the next big thing in Hollywood but being called fat and struggling to fit into her Batgirl suit for 1997′s Batman & Robin she had no interest in being famous after that and disappeared from the public eye but she’s now primed for a comeback

Page 13: Lady Gaga fears Dua Lipa is trying to steal her sound as well as her fan base after Dua’s new album got rave reviews but Dua and her camp think that Gaga is the true copycat, Chrissy Teigen is living every hour like it’s happy hour while in quarantine with John Legend and their two kids after vowing to quit drinking in 2017 and 2019, VIP Style -- Sarah Michelle Gellar (pictured), Antoni Porowski sharing the snacks is his pantry including Lenny & Larry’s vegan protein cookies, Sean “Diddy” Combs, January Jones, Ashley Green, Olivia Culpo and Christian McCaffrey, Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott

Page 14: The Week in Photos -- Liam Hemsworth in Men’s Health

Page 15: Pink and Carey Hart, Jason Statham and son Jack

Page 16: Kaley Cuoco adopted two tiny piglets named Leeroy and Wilbur, Jennifer Garner and her lookalike daughter Violet

Page 17: Nina Dobrev, Demi Moore and Bruce Willis’ family book club reading How to Rule the World From Your Couch

Page 18: Chris Martin coming and going in low-riding jeans on a bike

Page 20: Jillian Michaels in the park in Malibu with kids Phoenix and Lukensia, Blake Shelton let Gwen Stefani shave a few inches off his quarantine mullet

Page 21: Sarah Silverman cheers on health care workers

Page 22: Jimmy Fallon’s daughters Winnie and Frances help him on the Tonight Show from home

Page 23: Rachel Brosnahan snuggles her dog Nikki, Kate Hudson and Danny Fujikawa walk daughter Rani, Joel Kinnaman hugs supermodel girlfriend Kelly Gale on the beach in LA

Page 24: Stars Behaving Badly -- Lisa Rinna opens a bottle of wine with her teeth, Justin Theroux and rescue dog Kuma wearing a black tie for their sit-down dinner, Courtney Stodden walks her dog Gucci in nothing but a bathrobe

Page 25: Miley Cyrus sprawled across the lap of the Easter Bunny, Ryan Gosling got a parking ticket

Page 26: Say What?! Hannah Ann Sluss paints an unflattering picture of ex Peter Weber’s manhood, Brad Pitt who recently surprised his makeup artist with a home renovation on Celebrity IOU, Emily Ratajkowski on her new addiction to TikTok in self-isolation, Khloe Kardashian on the prospect of getting into a physical fight with her eldest sister Kourtney Kardashian, Laverne Cox on turning 48 in May

Page 28: Cameron Diaz and Benji Madden have grown closer since welcoming their daughter Raddix in January

Page 29: Already a mom of four Heidi Klum is hoping to have another baby with new hubby Tom Kaulitz

Page 30: Cover Story -- Rob Lowe’s untold story -- as he prepares to mark 30 years of sobriety, a look back at his painful wild past

Page 34: Kanye West is fed up with Kim Kardashian -- Kim wants Kanye to help out more at home but he’s tired of being nagged

Page 36: Val Kilmer kisses and tells -- former ladies’ man tells all on a series of famous exes in his new book I’m You’re Huckleberry -- Angelina Jolie, Ellen Barkin, Cher, Carly Simon, Cindy Crawford

Page 38: Kelly Ripa Monster Mom -- her older children are tiring of her criticism

Page 40: Insta Pups -- these canine cuties have built up online followings that rival those of their celebrity owners -- Mark Wahlberg’s pint-size phenom named Champ, Lady Gaga’s li’l monster Asia or Batpig

Page 41: Andy Cohen’s real housepet Wacha, Nina Dobrev’s shaggy scene-stealer Maverick, Scott Disick and Sofia Richie’s baby girl Hershula

Page 42: Who Lives Here? Jennifer Love Hewitt

Page 44: Entertainment

Page 45: Star Review -- Giacomo Gianniotti

Page 46: Fashion -- safari-inspired style -- Emma Watson

Page 48: Beauty -- brow wow -- Sofia Vergara, Shay Mitchell, Emma Roberts

Page 50: Style Crush -- Lauren Conrad

Page 52: Diva or Down-to-Earth? Diva Jessica Alba employs a styling staff, Diva Gigi Hadid applies a 24k gold beauty mask

Page 53: Down-to-Earth Amber Heard cleans out her garage, Down-to-Earth Kristin Chenoweth solves a puzzle

Page 54: Social Stars Posts of the Week -- Jessica Biel and son Silas, Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton, Justin Bieber and Hailey Bieber, Bella Hadid kisses a horse while self-isolating at mom Yolanda Hadid’s Pennsylvania farm

Page 55: Sam Smith, Kevin Hart and son Kenzo, Shay Mitchell, Jana Kramer and Mike Caussin with their kids

Page 56: Horoscope -- Taurus Jessica Alba, They’re Not Together But They Should Be -- Capricorn Bradley Cooper and Sagittarius Rita Ora

Page 58: Made Ya Look -- Jim Carrey on The Kelly Clarkson Show

Page 60: What I’m Into -- Jenni “JWOWW” Farley

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nitrateglow · 4 years

Note

For the character meme: Jack Griffin, Jack Torrance, Harry Roat Jr, and Jonathan Brewster, please!

Favorite thing about them: His gleeful arrogance. Plus he’s got such style. If I was invisible, I would not think to put together such a stylish outfit.

Least favorite thing about them: I mean, he does want to kill people and take over the world. He could really put his talents to better use and be more like Violet Parr.

Favorite line: “HERE WE GO GATHERING NUTS AND HAAAY, NUTS AND HAAAAY, NUTS AND HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY”

brOTP: Jack and science.

OTP: I think his relationship with Flora is actually really sweet. She’s the only person who can make him stop murdering and plotting for five minutes.

nOTP: None

Random headcanon: He got major frostbite when running around nude in the snow, only he’s too badass to complain about it.

Unpopular opinion: None!

Song I associate with them: “I’m the Invisible Man” by Scatman John because I am an unoriginal person sometimes

Favorite picture of them:

Iconic.

Favorite thing about them: Uh.... well.... he makes funny faces?

Okay, before he goes totally bonkers, I do think he wants to be a better father for Danny than he is. That scene in the bedroom where Danny asks “would you ever hurt me and mom,” I do think Jack was trying to go through the motions of being a good dad, but he just-- doesn’t feel it. And eventually, he stops trying.

Least favorite thing about them: Being horribly abusive to his wife and child. The way he treats Wendy even before homicide enters his brain is just so hard to watch.

Favorite line: “YOU’VE HAD YOUR WHOLE FUCKING LIFE TO THINK THINGS OVER!”

brOTP: Jack and Floyd.

OTP: NONE.

nOTP: Jack and Wendy. I feel so bad for that woman. I imagine she was desperate when she even started dating him.

Random headcanon: Jack married Wendy out of obligation when she ended up pregnant with Danny. I think Danny was an accident and that Jack probably dated Wendy because she was easy to seduce and she hung on his every word, which gave his ego such a boost. However, he didn’t want to marry her and when she ended up pregnant, she made him feel like they had to get married and that he had to set more writing time aside to be a better provider for their family, so this is why he resents her so openly.

Unpopular opinion: I do think Jack Nicholson goes maybe a bit too overboard even early on in the movie. But then again, his over the topness is so entertaining that I can’t complain too much. But then again, the fact that he’s already being a massive monster in the hotel the moment everyone else vacates does make sense. Now that he and his family are alone, he doesn’t feel the need to even pretend to be civil to Wendy.

Song I associate with them: Both “Midnight and the Stars and You” and on a slightly related note, “Walking in a Winter Wonderland.”

Favorite picture of them:

He makes the movement of eyebrows a high art, I tell ya...

Favorite thing about them: How his intelligence is his biggest asset. While the studio wanted to cast more physically intimidating people like George C. Scott or Rod Steiger, I love how Arkin’s Roat is just an average height/weight guy who is powerful because he’s quick on his feet and resourceful. Much like how the Joker would not last in a fistfight with Batman, Roat would totally get his ass kicked by Mike and Carlino (together or alone) if he weren’t the smartest guy in the room. I gotta appreciate that, being a Ravenclaw.

Least favorite thing about them: He’s a murderer/pusher/blackmailer/rapist/con-man/arsonist.

Favorite line: “They had comic book minds, so we did it their way, right until the end. And then, topsy-turvy-- me topsy and them turvy :D “

brOTP: Roat and whoever stocks the plastic gloves at Hammacher Schlemmer.

OTP: Roat and Lisa. I mean, it doesn’t turn out well since they’re both treacherous and greedy, but they certainly seem like they would have interesting dates, don’t they?

nOTP: Roat and anyone else. Like, I’m afraid if I pray for more Wait Until Dark fic to exist, fate will just give me extremely OOC, poorly written Roat/Susy or Roat/Mike fics with terrible summaries like “The end of the movie wasn’t the only time Roat penetrated Mike from behind nudge nudge wink wink.”

Random headcanon: He got Geraldine after getting into a fight with another thug when he was a teenager still a bit green when it came to the underworld. He killed the guy and collected Geraldine as a trophy to commemorate his first official kill.

Unpopular opinion: None. He is the perfect trash. Though a more meta unpopular opinion might be that I am morbidly fascinated with the fact that Quentin Tarantino played this character. It was a panned performance but I would love to see it just the same, especially what he did with the disguises.

Song I associate with them: “Theme for Three” from the film, pretty much anytime it plays. Even though it’s supposed to apply to all the con-men, I mainly associate the unstable melody and off-key pianos with Roat-- it really fits his f’ed up personality.

Favorite picture of them:

Because anytime he licks his lips, it just does things to me.

Favorite thing about them: He just totally owns how violent he is. Like, he gives no freudian excuse, no tragic event that twisted him. He’s just there and bad and badass and you better know not to mess with him. I also love how much he clearly loves his criminal work.

Least favorite thing about them: Well, going after Mortimer isn’t very nice. And the scene where he ties Mortimer up so he can torture him is actually a really terrifying scene in an otherwise hilarious, light movie.

Favorite line: “He wouldn't have died of pneumonia if I hadn't shot him! “

brOTP: Jonathan and Einstein. All his threats to Einstein aside, I love how odd a pair they make. You mentioned them listening to Christmas music on the radio while driving, and I just love that image-- Einstein peering through the dark, humming along, and Jonathan scowling and hating it, but he’s too tired to harp on Einstein about everything so they just drive on.

OTP: None in the movie, though I loved that one fic with a certain OC character...

nOTP: I’m sure somewhere, on someone’s hard-drive or in someone’s twisted mind, there is a fic shipping Jonathan with Mortimer. This person needs Jesus very badly.

Random headcanon: After his surgery, he just hates Boris Karloff since he so often gets compared to the guy. He refuses to look at any movie the man is in and often says he wishes he could kill him just from the frustration of comparison. Though when he was younger, he did enjoy The Black Cat, especially the flaying scene.

Unpopular opinion: None.

Song I associate with them: “Psycho Killer”

Favorite picture of them:

Look at them. Look how mischevious they look. Like they’re going to toilet paper roll a house and not gruesomely maim and murder Jonathan’s family members.

These were all such fun to write. Thanks!

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heisthq · 4 years

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* ･ﾟ𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒏𝒆𝒘 𝒌𝒊𝒅 𝒐𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒄𝒌.

NAME — violet. AGE — twenty. GENDER & PRONOUNS — cis female, she / her. FACECLAIM — giorgia whigham.

* ･ﾟ𝒃𝒐𝒓𝒏 𝒂 𝒍𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒄𝒖𝒃, 𝒓𝒂𝒗𝒆𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒔.

jack of all trades, master of none. you know that your skillset isn’t quite as honed as those of the other members, but you have the insatiable desire to learn, and some say that’s just as valuable. you’re only in on a trial basis, which you very well know, so you cling to any opportunity with claws and teeth, desperate to prove yourself. you’ll make your mark if it kills you to do it.

* ･ﾟ𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔.

THE BLEEDING HEART ⇢ you aren’t quite sure whether to be annoyed or touched that they insist on looking out for you. on one hand, their mothering is a little, well, smothering, but it’s also kind of endearing. for now, at least, you tolerate it. after all, at the end of the day, you know they mean well, regardless of what their standard resting bitch face projects to the world.

THE INSIDE MAN ⇢ you’re not stupid. you know that they’re beyond irritated with you, but you want so badly to unlock their plethora of secrets. they’ve impressed you many times over with their balancing act, but any attempt to connect with them has fallen flat — or worse, ended in open hostility. you just want to improve your skills. is that really such a crime?

#skeleton rp #new rp #heist rp #crime rp #rpg #all.#the new kid on the block.

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rose-maraich · 5 years

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Chapter 1

Myself and @jackbarbarossabancoran have begun a rp-form reinterpretation of Maraich and Bancorans first day together. We hope you enjoy it, we shall be posting our N*FW chapters elsewhere in the near future. We hope you enjoy!

Bancoran

Bancoran watched the gentle rise and fall of the assassin's chest as he lay unconscious. He'd had the bullet removed and the wound bandaged, but his face was still pale. He looked so fragile, like a porcelain doll, it was difficult to believe the strength he possessed, and the cunning that had almost cost him his life more than once.

There was something different about this one. Bancoran couldn't give it a name or a reason, but it was there, creeping behind his heart and tugging at his chest so that he felt constantly anxious and on edge as he never had before. Was it because they were so evenly matched?

The boy's breathing changed and Bancoran was drawn from his thoughts to watch him again.

Maraich

Groggily, still half-sedated Maraich woke, his hand clenching on the blankets below him, his throat gurgling slightly and then finally his eyes opened and he looked at the plush, silken head rest.

Where am I?

He coughed a couple of times, gathering his thoughts as best he could as he turned his head.

He gasped and tried to sit up, but a wave of dizziness overtook him, and he fell back against the pillows. But he had the wherewithal the feel his shirt, his skirt. No one had touched him while he was unconscious.

He swallowed dryly, then licked his dry lips and stared at the man, his target, Major Bancoran.

"Well?"

Bancoran

Bancoran offered him a glass of water.

"You're lucky, the bullet didn't break any important tendons or nerves, but it did have to be removed."

Maraich

Maraich kept his eyes on him, not moving to take the glass. His arm was numb for the most part, but it was beginning to ache, and he knew the pain would be terrible soon.

He said nothing, but his jaw clenched a little.

Bancoran

"It's not laced if that's what you're afraid of. " He took a few sips himself, then offered it again.

Maraich

He turned his head away, knowing this was simply the first stage. He knew all the tricks, had had them a hundred times, and he was tired of it.

Bancoran

"Suit yourself." He set it aside and focused on lighting another cigarette.

"Where is Etrange being held?" he asked, his tone suggesting that it was a boring topic he was eager to get out of the way.

Maraich

"Stay here and die." He could hear Larkens voice as if it he was by his ear.

"I don't know." He lied, still looking away and sounding utterly heartbroken.

Bancoran

Please don't sound like that.

Bancoran's heart ached, why did the catch in his voice make it so hard to breathe? He had seen dejection before, eyes hollow and waiting for death. It was all known to him, familiar to him, he'd seen it before in the mirror, but this was different. He couldn't bear it.

He rubbed his temple with a gloved fingertip and a bit of ash dropped against the white bedding.

"I know how organisations like the diamond syndicate work. I know how they engulf you, drown you." He took a slow drag of his c*garette and let it back out in a curl of smoke.

"And I know that because I live you are a dead man walking." he avoided his eyes.

"So, let's skip this game. You're too beautiful for such unpleasantness and I have a hostage to find. Tell me and spare us both the trouble."

Maraich

Don't show weakness. That was rule one, but Maraich couldn't help feeling despair. Yet again his life had fallen apart beneath his feet and this time he would die for it.

It wasn't so much that he didn't want to tell the Major, he knew he was dead, but his mind just wouldn't form the words.

He swallowed and sat up a little further in bed.

"Spare me the flattery. This isn't my first time." He said in a flat voice, then sighed and waited for his parry.

Bancoran

"Then spare me the trouble. Where is she." He said, this time it was an order and he rubbed his cigarette out on the bedside table.

Maraich

Maraich smiled softly and sadly, reaching up to brush his tangled hair from his face.

"I don't know." He repeated in his most silky and soft voice.

Bancoran

Bancoran’s heart ached for the sad little smile. He wanted so badly to comfort him. To take him away from all of this. To say simply, the diamond syndicate is gone, and you are free.

It was becoming difficult to concentrate between a fluttering of the same desire he'd felt for him the first time he laid eyes on him, and an ache in his heart that was dizzying and exquisite.

"Please, just tell me." He took his hand and thread his fingers with his.

"I don't want to hurt you."

Maraich

He stared at his hand for a beat, trying not to cry at how tender it felt. But then he remembered where he was and jerked his hand back, looking up at him with anger.

"You've already shot me."

Bancoran

"I couldn't let you go. It was no more my choice to shoot you than your choice to kill me." It was a bit of a stretch, but he prayed there was some truth in it.

Maraich

Maraich looked at him impassively, but his heart beat faster. How did he know?

"Your words are pretty, Major. But I'd rather you just get on with it."

Bancoran

"My name is Bancoran." He said softly, trying not to feel a rush of hope for the change in Maraich's eyes.

Maraich

"Jack Barbarossa Bancoran. I know."

Bancoran

"Maraich" he whispered, leaning closer to him, this time he tried to meet his eyes.

Maraich

He kept his eyes just over his shoulder, his jaw set, but he didn't quite move away. How strange to have someone say his name so softly, even though he knew it was all a rouse.

"That's one name."

Bancoran

"It's yours." he whispered, moving a little closer, his weight shifted on the bed and moved him slightly too.

"Isn't it?"

Maraich

His eyes flitted over the wall, but all he could think about was how nice Bancoran smelt and how soft his breath was when it touched his cheek.

This was it. He could carry on fighting for a lost cause or he could surrender to his fate. Oh well, maybe he could choose his own end instead of letting the Syndicate choose for him.

"Yes."

Bancoran

"I'm glad to have met you, Maraich" He crawled over top of him but didn't touch him.

"What do you want?”

Maraich

Tears fell down his cheeks, heavy and sad but he didn't sob, he was beyond noisy cry and into the terrifying, awful quiet tears.

Finally, he looked at him, into his smoky violet eyes and felt the full weight of his magical pull. He knew his name, B*shōnen Killer, knew that his skill set was precisely this, but maybe, one time before he died he could have someone make love to him rather than simply having s*x.

"I want to be free."

Bancoran

"I can set you free." He whispered, ignoring how his own heart leapt at the thought of letting him free with his own two hands.

"All you have to do is cooperate. "

He leaned down and kissed the tears from his cheeks.

Maraich

"I might be young, but I'm anything but naïve." He whispered, when he'd meant to be confidant.

He gave a soft gasping-sob at the gentle kiss and turned his cheek to him, half closing his eyes.

"I know what you are, Major. Pretty boy Killer. Don't lie to me, please? I know I'm as good as dead. You might as well have left the bullet in me or shot a new one through my heart."

Bancoran

"If you assist in the search effort for Etrange, and the capture of Count Larken you will be able to obtain a royal pardon. I'm not lying, Maraich If there was no chance I would not lie."

He leaned down, his dark hair curtained them in black cascades.

"Please? I want to help you."

#chapter 1 #patalliro #patalliro!#patalliro rp #maraich #Maraich Juschenfe #maraich rp #bancoran #jackbarossabancoran #banmara #fanfic

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pyreo · 6 years

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Fixing Incredibles 2: stuff I would do

Hey wanna hear some thoughts on what I’d do to tune up a movie I found slightly disappointing? There’s three main aspects I want to deal with which are

1. badly utilised new supers 2. iffy villain motivation 3. third act was a mess

So here’s a few things I’d wanna do to rework some of that

So first off, that’s a lie, there’s really 5 things that bothered me. this should not have been an immediate sequel where no time had passed. they actually had to backtrack on the character development from the first movie to have them do the same character arcs again. Helen’s back on wanting her kids to stay away from dangerous heroics. Violet’s reward for learning to assert herself, a date with Tony, is erased and she has to win him all over again. Bob, in a weird 180 from his first portrayal where he adored spending time with Violet and Dash during his training montage... suddenly struggles with caring for them, though that’s mostly the fault of Jack-Jack’s powers manifesting.

So firstly, I’d do what I always imagined the sequel would be and push it a few years forward. Allow it room to change. Have Violet be a college student with Tony as her longterm boyfriend. Have Dash be a teen who’s still eager to save the world, but needing to learn that no danger is better than stopping danger. And make Jack-Jack a child, still in need of supervision but not a total cartoonish liability who necessitates long sequences of adjustment to discovering his powers, again, a retread we already saw last time. Every character arc was a re-do and the constant burden of dealing with Jack-Jack really slowed stuff down. (this was my 5th thing) Fix this by skipping forward. (Also, Violet’s hero moment being... learning that she has to set personal glory aside and babysit Jack-Jack while everyone else does stuff? Are you kidding me?)

We now have a different angle on Helen’s worries - she’s not just concerned about putting her kids in danger. She acts like it, she tells them not to start jumping at the chance to get into heroism. She tells them to apply themselves in school and get normal lives too, in case it doesn’t pan out. But this feels familiar, because it’s what she said in the first movie, and it’s a front. She’s worried about her kids growing up, becoming adults - Violet basically is one - and how she can’t protect them if they move out. She pretends it’s about their powers to cover this. This also refocuses the movie’s main character arc onto Helen like it’s... supposed to be, instead of putting it on Bob’s learning to parent and accept his wife’s super- importance, because despite being framed as Elastigirl’s time to shine, it’s not her story when she doesn’t embody a change of character. It’s still Bob.

So, those things established:

1. Better villain ideology

Revenge because supers failed to save your parents? Basic. Also not that believable, because the reason the heroes failed to answer Daddy Business’s call is that they’d been outlawed and given new lives as normal people. They could not have come to the rescue; it was illegal. And a superhero enthusiast would have known that. And, hey, ‘criminals shot our dad and then our mother died afterwards of a broken heart’? Are you kidding me? Just have them both get shot, fuck it. Stop this ‘women dying because their man tragically died’ shit. It’s getting melodramatic at that point.

No criminals, no revenge stuff. Have the Deavor’s parents die when they were in early teens. The brother and sister had to support each other as they started to navigate adulthood. This instilled in them the philosophy that’s common to the type of silicon valley startup wizards they parody - that anyone can pull themselves up by their bootstraps and be hugely successful if they try hard, having come from orphans near poverty to multimillionaires.

I want both of them, brother and sister, to be the villains together. You don’t really need to twist that. They both come off as helpful fans who want to put their money to use helping supers get back in the game. After all the biggest complaint keeping supers illegal is the property damage and lawsuits, and what fixes that? Money. They also both believe, as is Evelyn’s motivation for real, that superheroes are actually causing the public to develop dependency on them.

I would set up the siblings as advocates of Randian objectivism in how they work. They think everyone can go from nothing to having everything. They think it’s a personal imperitive to be hard working, to contribute and make yourself a success, without relying on others. They think needing a safety net - superheroes, as a metaphor for social facilities - is a weakness that stops people from taking responsibility for themselves. I want to downplay the ‘tech company who makes tiny cameras’ thing, because that was far too modern day to fit in the 60s, and make it more about sheer money generation and the ability for the siblings to pay off debts and influence public opinion; essentially, that money can get you anything, glossing over the corrupt nature of that by claiming it’s doing the right thing to help the heroes.

Winston still had a childlike adoration for supers as a kid, but it was killed when he grew up without parents who couldn’t BE saved, followed by extremely hard work in the financial sector, dealing with stress, and realising that he worked just as hard, but got no media acclaim, as people who just happen to have been born with powers. Both siblings invest in personal security solutions, aiming to eventually reveal a plan to put superheroes out of business by outpacing them with technology. To use the free market to provide ways that normal people can protect themselves, without becoming complacent, relying on dubious, flawed heroes, without becoming blind to danger because they expect to be saved. Their evil motto is basically ‘don’t expect anyone to save you’, putting the burden of responsibility on the individual to take care of themselves and be solely in charge of their success or failure.

The superheroes, of course, represent altruism, saving people just because they can, just because they were given an ability and can use it to help anyone and anyone they wish. Making no judgements between rich or poor, personal backgrounds, social class... everyone can be saved just the same.

The villains intend to gain the trust of the three main heroes - Mr Incredible, Elastigirl and Frozone - and push them into good public opinion by funding everything they do or break. Destruction is paid for, claims are settled. Heroes shouldn’t have to worry about it, they say. What they actually intend is for the heroes to become dependent on their company for money, just as they see the public growing dependent on supers instead of taking steps to protect themselves. They will set up a huge, climactic battle in the most expensive part of the city, after the heroes have been encouraged to ignore the financial cost to their feats. Then they’ll withdraw support, burying the trio in horrific debt to a level they cannot recover from, while also pushing a new line of tech solutions to make money off people’s protection. Technically, they want to help people, but they need to make sure the legal battle for supers will finally crush them out of work so they can get the maximum profit from their products.

2. More cohesive new super team

It’s not that they were bad, I just felt it was jarring after the profiles Syndrome kept on his targets - all supers were completely normal people who happened to have abilities. The new guys were okay, but felt like oddball ideas and out-of-place mutants (the whole point is that supers are being pushed into normal lives and hiding their innate abilities. I dunno how you do that as an owl-man). I would make all the new guys young adults and teenagers.

One, to point out the reality of the situation with supers. The new blood is going to be young. After what Syndrome did, nearly all adult heroes have been killed. I want to point out that, in order to bring back the idea of superheroism, we have to acknowledge that the ones who are going to do that are a generation down. Elastigirl meets them (we’re keeping Voyd obviously, but they’re all nervous youngsters like her, 15-22 ish). Elastigirl get confronted by her protective instinct - legalising supers means all of these kids going into danger. But, through talking with them, she realises how much it means to them, not having to hide who they are. They’re all like Voyd is. They were all shunned, pushed away, and ultimately hid their powers while feeling like absolute shit for being abnormal. There is a very clear real life allegory here. Helen realises that legalising supers isn’t just about throwing yourself into danger. It’s about allowing people to be who they are, and not shame them for something out of their control. They’re unpractised, they’re ashamed of showing their powers to her, and Helen mentally adopts every single one of them instantly.

Helen gets a montage of training her super team to understand their powers better. She sees them become more at home with themselves after an early life full of restriction and even self-hatred. It’s not just about being cool, it’s about your identity, and Helen gets that and stops having reservations about legalising supers again. It’s bigger than her family. And the Deavors arrange and fund this, because they want as many heroes implicated as possible, they want both generations of supers wiped out and to never be able to return. Dependency is a crutch they would say, and humanity needs to learn to survive without it. We can keep Screenslaver as the fake villain setting up the big final battle, and we can keep his monologue about dependency on screens as a metaphor, but devolving into a diatribe against the nature of neglecting your personal success by vicariously watching someone else’s.

3. The third act didn’t fit

We already don’t have the dead weight of baby JJ crashing the pace of the story. He’s a young child, and we’re going to have Edna watch him (she can love it like she does in the movie, Jack-Jack can find her research enriching too). This time it’s Frozone, Elastigirl and Mr Incredible who get taken by mind control. The siblings are going to stage a fight between all three, pretending that superheroes are unstable, liable to turn on each other at the cost of civilian lives. That should turn the public against them for good, while causing massive amounts of damage. They use the Screenslaver persona to set up a showdown in the city, only to capture the three supers and turn them on each other.

Not mind controlled? Elastigirl’s recruits. They just barely manage to escape it. They go to get help from their mentor, only to find the supers gone, and Violet and Dash seeing the carnage on TV and getting suited up to find out what’s going on. The kids get an introduction and team up together, heading off to stop their teacher and parents, new blood vs old guard.

That results in six or seven barely trained supers going up against three extremely experienced ones, while they also have to try to minimise loss of life and property damage. While dealing with the trauma, for Violet and Dash, of being attacked by their own parents and not knowing why. Also, they get backup from Honey. Frozone’s wife. SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE IN THIS MOVIE. She was designed and then cut and that’s a TRAVESTY. She’s already popular, she was a breakout hit, let her be in this. She steps forward, no powers, regular civilian clothes, and helps the kids out with advice from the ground, picking them up when they fall, and huge vocal encouragement. She kicks ass because that’s what she fucking does. She helps direct the crowds to safety, she tells these kids to look at their super suits and believe in what they’re capable of. And it’s her who snags Frozone after his powers get strategically rebuffed, she grabs him and grabs his goggles off and fixes it herself.

With another adult on their side and better confidence the new supers manage to pull Elastigirl and Mr Incredible back to reality too, which concludes Helen’s anxiety about their capability and the passing of the torch. They did it, they were responsible - there’s no casualties and with all their powers combined, they managed to avert damage better than Helen and Bob ever did. The adults realise that the kids can be trusted to handle heroism and Helen is super proud of her trainees-slash-children.

That leaves the actual capture of the villains, which comes down to running from the combined might of all the supers who gradually cut down their ability to escape, culminating in Winston stopping Evelyn from getting away, and having a personal realisation. A resurgence of the boyish glee he once had for heroes stopping the villains. He foils his sister and turns both of them in, willingly, in a weird way fulfilling his dream of saving the day like his idols did.

To round off, thanks to the rehabilitated (and not sabotaged) hero image, and the display of capability the young supers put on, supers are legalised again. Helen and Bob now work as teachers to the kids as part of a new government program to make sure kids with powers learn how to responsibly control them, Helen of course continuing her role as mentor to her massive new family, and Bob finally able to work without restraining himself. The government agrees that encouraging kids to train properly and learn how to avoid risk and costly situations is worth endorsing. Dash befriends some of the other teens in the supergroup and has friends he can push his abilities with, without it being unfair.

Finally, it’s time for Violet to move out, because things must move on. Helen, Bob and Frozone (who gets an updated suit because come on) are accepting that they’ll eventually they’ll have to let others take their place. Violet’s going to move in with Tony and get a normal job, because she still yearns for a normal lifestyle underneath it all, but she won’t be far away and can always answer the call to join the family in the field. They all bid her farewell (”Finally maybe I can get some peace without Dash bursting into my room-” “I can run to your apartment in one minute 28 seconds, I checked!!”) but Helen isn’t worried any more, because she has renewed faith in how well her children have grown up and is accepting they don’t need has as much any more. And besides, she has tons more children who need her too and it’s up to her to help them find their true potential.

Thanks for reading this way too long exercise in figuring out what I wanted from the sequel to one of my favourite films in the world... the original Incredibles was centred around heroes also just being human, who make mistakes and have to grow up and change, and the villain’s fanboy mentality was the antithesis to that. I would’ve wanted a sequel that understood the message of its predecessor in that people have to develop and grow, one aspect of which is letting go, but what we actually got seemed too static and unwilling to move away from what we had already resolved in the first one.

#the incredibles #some creative bogus analysis I guess #this is VERY long I'm sorry??#yeah this is like.. 2.5k words what the fuck

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