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thecreelhouse · 3 months

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pin back in the grenade

Paring: Steve Harrington x AFAB reader

Word count: 6k+

CW/tags: best friends to lovers, hurt/comfort, angst, post s4, mentions of wounds/blood/etc., fluff, PiV unprotected sex, oral sex (m receiving), somno if you squint (tbh not really but just to be safe gonna add that one), light dirty talk. title is from ‘liar’ by paramore. MDNI

request from this post (that was supposed to be a blurb and I am so sorry): 🩹 tending to each other's wounds, 🍯 friends to lovers, 🔥 slow burn, 🛏 only one bed

also combining this with a request I got back after s4 part 2 dropped (to that anon, I am REALLY sorry lmao) for post s4 comfort sex w/ Steve. anyway, hope y’all enjoy <3

“Do you get a new freckle every day?”

Steve’s brows crinkle together while he laughs wearily. “Huh?”

You’re cleaning the wound around his neck and can’t help noticing just how many freckles and moles he has across his body. Or, from what you can see, at least. He has his shirt off while you’re tending to his injuries from the Upside Down and Vecna’s destruction across Hawkins.

Over the last several years, Steve’s normally vacant house became a safe haven for disasters like these, also a place where the kids could be together to just hang out on the quiet, normal days. He never said it, but he loved hearing the kids laughing and yelling, sometimes having movie nights, or playing DnD; it was a welcomed sound compared to the painful quiet he had grown used to for the majority of his life.

Tonight, no inside jokes and endearing name calling echoed throughout the house. No fighting over which movie to play first, or what kind of pizza to order, or the shouting and cheering that usually came along with playing their favorite game. If anything, there were somber conversations, softly echoing through the house, with words and emotions no kid should have to be worried about. Sometimes there was crying, or complete silence, where the only thing Steve could hear was the faint, yet now permanent ringing in his ears he had gained over the last several years. Any which way a sound like these carried through the house, it broke his heart.

So, you try distracting him as the two of you clean one another’s wounds for yet another night. You keep things light where possible, but the both of you know it’s only a bandaid over a permanent emotional scar that is torn open time and time again. The physical wounds always heal, but the heartbreak you’ve all grown accustomed to is one that weighs so heavy on everyone’s hearts, and you can’t imagine it vanishing anytime soon.

“Yeah, I swear, it’s like you’re magically turning into a connect the dots picture, or something.” Steve smiles, laughing softly through his nose at your corny attempt to keep his mind off of the trauma.

“You think so? Maybe one of these days you should come up with a drawing out of ‘em.” Steve’s trying his hardest to keep things lighthearted, too, but sometimes it’s just easier to feel the pain instead of forcing any positivity.

“Jesus, this is gnarly.” You murmur, still amazed by the damage Steve took this time around as you’re softly swiping some kind of medicated ointment along the open wound. He hisses from the dull sting, but the substance begins to numb the ache and inflammation, bringing some sort of relief, if any at all. “Do you feel like a greasy slug when you use this stuff? Because I definitely feel like a greasy slug when I use it.”

Neither of you had figured out the best way to dress the wound around his neck, so Steve had been changing clean t-shirts like bandages every few hours. The others, at least, were relatively easy to clean and dress, but they seemed to be deeper; Steve probably needed stitches on some, but he refused to go to the hospital, insisting other people in town had worse injuries, and needed the medical attention more.

“I mean, I feel slimy… but not like a slug— Jesus, how much sleep did you get last night?” At first, you think he’s asking because of your silly remark, but then he’s cupping the side of your face, thumb gently rubbing along your cheekbone, getting a better look at the dark circles draped under your eyes. You push aside the butterflies in your stomach from his touch as you reach for his clean shirt, moving his arms out in front of you to roll the fabric down and over his arms and head. For a moment, you miss his touch, but it’s back on your face after he adjusts his shirt.

“Seriously, are you sleeping at all?” He asks softly, eyes filled with worry. Leave it to Steve to worry about everyone else before himself.

You shrug as you look away, not wanting to make a big fuss. “Last night was just rough up here,” You poke at your temple. “That’s all. I’m sure I’ll be able to sleep easily tonight with how tired I am.”

“Where’d you sleep last night?” He asks, knowing decent spots to sleep were limited now that the all of the kids were reunited again. Everyone, except Max who was at the hospital, and Lucas, who refused to leave her side. Still, there were only so many places to rest for the entire group, even in a roomy house like Steve’s.

“Um… well, some of the kids had the pullout couch, one took a recliner, Robin has the guest room, and Jonathan and Nancy have your parents’ room… so I slept on the floor in the living room.” You shrug, but you know that contributed to the lack of sleep, and extra aches in your back. How you ever easily slept on the floor as a kid during sleepovers, you’ll never understand.

Steve looks bothered by this, letting go of your face as you move to the faucet to wash your hands. “What? Why didn’t you say something? You could’ve had my bed.”

You scoff a laugh out, “Steve, you need a real bed after everything you’ve been through. I can handle the floor like a big kid.”

“Okay, well, tonight you can sleep in my bed. I’ll take the floor, I don’t mind. Or I can sleep downstairs somewhere if you want sp—”

You shake your head wildly. “Don’t- I don’t wanna be alone again.” You maneuver around Steve as he slides off the counter, and you take his spot to let him tend to your wounds next. Finally, you confess, “I fell asleep once, and it was just one giant nightmare. I stayed up after that. Didn’t want to see that shit again.”

Steve washes his hands, lips pursed and brows furrowed as he keeps quiet for a moment, thinking. The two of you always trusted one another, always came to one another whenever you needed, so why the hell were you isolating yourself now?

“Next time, tell me. Wake me up. I don’t care.” Steve’s tone is firm, but he’s not upset with you. Just upset that you’re retreating into yourself when he just wants to help.

He starts peeling off the butterfly bandages around the slit skimming vertically down your eye. It begins just above your eyebrow, running down to your brow bone, pausing across your eye before continuing just under your lash line, finishing off past your cheekbone. Instinctually, your eye begins to squint closed, but the action tugs at your skin, stinging along the edge of your wound.

“Steve, you haven’t had a good night’s sleep since high school. Why would I wake you up when you need the rest?” He starts cleaning the wound, sighing to pause himself, think carefully about what he wants to say next. You keep going. “I actually did come in last night, but you were sound asleep. I didn’t have the heart to wake you up, not when you need the rest.”

“Close your eye for a second.” You do, appearing as if you’re failing an attempt at winking. Steve’s gently patting the cut with some sort of medical disinfectant on a cotton ball, heart aching little by little as you whimper in pain. You try keeping quiet, knowing your wounds are nothing compared to his. “You can cry you know. Or curse. Or yell. Or whatever. Stop trying to hide it.”

“Mine are like… paper cuts compared to yours.” He pats the wound dry with a new piece of cotton, sighing again. “What?”

“You don’t have to hide your pain from me. I’m not sure if you’re worried its a burden to anyone, or whatever, but you never hid from me before. What happened?” Steve begins to apply clean butterfly bandages along the deep slit in your skin. Every now and then, his eyes flicker to your lips, and you have to remind yourself your other face wound is a split in your lip. “Gotta get that next.”

“I can do it.”

“Nope, if you’re gonna nurse all of my wounds, it’s only fair if I do that for you in return.”

“Steve, you don’t have to—”

“No, but I want to. You’re my best friend, and you’ve been patching up my wounds since we were reckless little shits on the playground. You care about me, let me care about you.” His thumb gently presses on the untouched side of your bottom lip, holding it steady so he can begin fixing that one up, too. You’re too aware of how the pad of his thumb feels against your lip, wondering what it’d be like to wrap your lips around it and take him into your mouth.

“See, this is why I gotta hold your lip, you’re so twitchy.” Steve teases, unaware of why your bottom lip trembles every now and then when he’s so close. Is he really that clueless? “After this, you’re sleeping in my bed. I’ll carry you and lock you in my room if it means you’re gonna sleep like a normal person tonight.”

Your skin prickles and hair stands on end at his words. He really has no idea what he does to you with silly comments like these.

“Okay, but like…. What if I have to pee in the middle of the night?”

Steve stops his movements, snorting as his eyes close while a smile graces his features. With a shrug, he simply answers, “Hold it.”

Your jaw drops, feigning offense. “That’s fucked up, Steven.”

“So is sleeping on the floor instead of a bed.”

“You need it more than me!”

“Will you shut up for like, ten seconds? I’m almost done with this.” He’s stifling his own laughter, before murmuring, “Not gonna lie, you’re gonna look so badass when these are healed.”

“Pfffft. Maybe, but no one’s gonna be attracted to this mess.” You’re only joking, but Steve frowns as he applies petroleum jelly to your lips, generous on your cut.

“What? No fucking way. You’re still a babe.”

“Yeah, okay, Steve. No one’s gonna kiss me after this.” You chuckle, but notice the way his eyes flicker to your lips again, lingering longer than usual, then back to your eyes. His gaze is mesmerizing, with the warm brown color and hazel undertones, you can’t bring yourself to look away.

“I mean, I w—”

“Hey, St— oh,” Robin’s in the doorway of the bathroom, smirking at the two of you. “Am I interrupting something?” You lean back, fingers curled around the edge of the counter while Steve’s standing up straight, taking a step back from you as he clears his throat.

“N- no, we were just fixing each other up.” Steve nervously spits out, adding a shrug like everything’s cool.

“Right. Sure you were.” Robin teases. You want to shrink into yourself and completely disappear on the spot. “Where’s the box of movies you stole from work?”

You quirk a brow at her question, then look back at Steve. “You did what?”

“Shut it— I didn’t— I borrowed them. Robin, stop spreading rumors about me.”

“Fine. Sure. You “borrowed” them,” She flashes air quotes with her fingers, and you laugh. “Where are they? The kids are driving me up a wall trying to find them.”

Steve looks puzzled, chuckling. “They’re literally right next to the damn TV. Dustin should know that by now.”

She rolls her eyes, “Oh my god,” she turns out of the room yelling down the stairs, “Dustin! Get your shit together, man!” Before walking away, she glances at the two of you again with a smirk, “Have fun playing doctor, or whatever.”

“Leave.” Steve points out the door as Robin’s already leaving.

“Yeah, you showed her.” You tease Steve, trying to let go of what he was about to say before Robin barged in. You’re sliding off of the counter, and Steve playfully pushes your shoulders from behind, forcing you out of the bathroom.

“Alright, smart ass, let’s go.” He nudges you across the hall to his room, but you try turning away. Swiftly, he turns you back towards the door. “I wasn’t kidding, I’ll throw you over my shoulder if it means getting you to sleep in a bed.” He keeps a firm grip on your shoulders, pushing you through the doorway comically.

“Steve, if you wanted me in your bed so bad, all you have to do is ask nicely.” You’re not even trying to be coy or flirt, but it makes him choke on air. You spin around quickly, “Hey, you okay?”

“Yeah, I— wrong pipe.” He rasps out, clearing his throat. You don’t buy it, realizing your lazy joke was the reason for his coughing fit. Still, you let it go, not wanting to embarrass him. Steve continues clearing his throat as he pulls some old blankets out of his closet, and some pillows from his bed to lay out on the floor.

“Stay in your bed, I’ll take the floor, it’s fine.” You’re trying one more time, hoping he’ll stop being so stubborn and sleep in his fucking bed.

“Why are you so damn stubborn?” He wraps his arms around your waist and picks you up off the floor slightly, carrying you a few feet over before dropping you into his bed.

“I was just thinking the same about you.” You murmur, arms crossed as you look at the bed behind you. You realize how big it is, and have an idea. “If you won’t let me sleep on the floor, just sleep next to me. There’s plenty of room for the both of us anyway.”

“Sleep— sl— next to you? Same bed?” Steve’s voice cracks, pulling giggles out of you.

“Yes, Steve. Same bed. Unless you’ve got another one hiding around here.” You’re surprised you’re even suggesting this when the idea makes you incredibly nervous, but you need sleep, and Steve needs sleep, and you’re out of any other ideas. “If you want it to yourself though, I’ll sleep on the floor.”

“No- I- stop it, I’m gonna sleep on the floor, and that’s final.” His hands are on his hips, his signature, go-to move when he’s scolding the kids, but you’ve qualified for its appearance tonight, too. You rise to your knees on the bed, hitting eye level with him while you mirror him, hands falling to your hips in the same pose he has.

Steve isn’t having it, and before you can start verbally teasing him, he’s pushing you back into bed. You catch yourself on your hands as you stumble back onto the pillows. “I’m gonna superglue you to the bed.”

“Now you’re just being a child.”

“Me? You were just—” Steve sighs, hand dragging over his face. “Just go to sleep.”

“I don’t want to!” Your bottom lip is wobbling as your bloodshot eyes tear up ever so slightly; you’re doing all you can to hold them back, reminding yourself logically this isn’t that serious, but your emotions show otherwise.

If anyone else in any normal circumstances yelled this, they’d be deemed childish. You, on the other hand, you’re yelling this for perfectly valid reasons. And Steve knows what you’re feeling all too well. One more time, his heart breaks for you, watching the panic spread across your sleep deprived face.

“I don’t want to sleep, I don’t want to watch you get hurt over and over again in my nightmares. I’ve seen that too many times in real life, it’s sickening watching you get beaten to death time and time again… and I just— fuck. Steve, just take the fucking bed. Please? I don’t want to sleep, and you need it more than me, I really don’t mind the fl—”

Steve sits next to you and pulls you into a hug, holding you tightly against him. That’s when the floodgates finally break. You grip onto his shirt, balling the fabric into your fists as you begin crying on his shoulder.

“M’not going anywhere. Promise. You’re safe, I’m safe, everyone’s okay.” You know that’s not completely truthful; Max is hanging on by a thread in the hospital, and Eddie’s gone. Steve knows this, but right now his concern is getting you to finally fall asleep. “C’mon, you’ll feel better if you lay down.” You expect Steve to gently nudge you to the pillows alone, but he keeps his hold on you, carefully laying the both of you down. “You sure you’re okay with me staying in bed?” You nod against his shoulder, wrapping yourself around him as if that’ll anchor him here for good.

“Don’t go,” You’re mumbling into the fabric of his shirt, wanting to tug yourself closer to him, hang onto him like a clingy koala, but you’re trying to stay mindful of his injuries.

“Not going anywhere.” Steve whispers, kissing the top of your head before lingering for a moment. “Not going anywhere without you.” Neither of you untangle from one another, and Steve’s embrace is starting to calm you down to steadier breathing and shaky hiccups instead of heavy crying filled with anxiety and dread. With your body desperate for rest and the security you feel with Steve, it doesn’t take long for sleep to pull you in. Steve’s snoring softly shortly after you fall asleep.

———

At some point in the night, the two of you untangle, rolling to opposite sides of the bed. Steve’s woken up by movement, strange shifting in the bed next to him, and an airy whimper, just loud enough for him to hear. He rubs his eyes, turning over and sees your figure, facing away from him, remembering that the two of you fell asleep in his bed.

Steve’s not sure what time it is, nor does he really care, especially not after hearing another soft noise float from your parted lips. Trying to adjust to the dark surroundings, despite the weak glow from a night light plugged in, he stares at you, or what he can see, at least, worried you’re having another nightmare. He moves closer and leans over you, prepared to wake you up and give comfort if you need, but you don’t look scared. If anything, you look pained, frustrated; Steve’s eyes scan down your figure as you move again, noticing the way your hips roll forward against your own hand.

Holy shit.

Frozen, he can’t take his gaze off of you. He needs to. He should roll back over and force himself back to sleep, pretend he never heard anything, never saw you—

“Steve…” You murmur, languidly grinding against the heel of your palm, face buried into the pillow as you writhe under his imaginary touch. His mind starts spiraling.

That’s why you got nervous when he held your lip, or when you mentioned how with a lip scar inevitable in the near future, no one would want to kiss you, and the way the two of you couldn’t take your eyes off of one another. How you looked so mortified when Robin walked in, forcing the two of you apart. He begins to realize how this isn’t new, this has been going on for awhile, and he can’t believe how oblivious he’s been.

The signs have always been in your lingering touches, when you lock eyes with him and share knowing glances no one else would understand, the way you’ve always tried protecting him, or tending to his now routinely scheduled injuries whenever he’s caught up in anything related to the Upside Down. It’s always been in the way you’d give up your comfort for him, how you’d never complain if he woke you up from nightmares, calling at three in the morning.

How it’s an unspoken pact between the two of you to share your fries with one another, or when one falls asleep early during movie nights, the other thoughtfully covers them in a blanket, letting them rest. How you always keep extra medical supplies in your car just for Steve’s clumsy ass. How he’s sneaking you video tapes for free whenever you visit him at work. How you insist on calling him exactly at midnight on his birthday.

You’d drop everything in an instant for Steve, and he’d do the same for you without hesitation. Whenever he tries to put your needs first, you’re quick to point out that someone needs to care about him, too.

Steve can’t believe how clueless he’s been, and out of all the times he’s figuring this out, it’s now, while you’re having a wet dream about him. Because of fucking course it would hit him now.

While his thoughts ran in a million different directions at once, he wasn’t aware of how hard he became, hearing your cute little noises, and how he’s still pressed right against you from behind. Does he let you continue? Does he wake you up? If he does, what’s his excuse? Lie and say it was a nightmare? Or tell you the truth, risking ruining something before it could ever begin, embarrassing you on the spot?

Without warning, you turn over, still asleep as your arms slip around his torso loosely, as if you’re still trying to be careful with his wounds while knocked out. One of your legs slot between his, and Steve has to bite back a groan at the pressure against his bulge. As if that alone wasn’t threatening to make him fall apart, your hips begin moving lazily again against his leg, and he can feel your sticky heat on his skin through your sleep shorts. Steve’s about to lose his fucking mind.

“Stevie, wanna make y’feel good…” You’re still asleep as you murmur this. Steve knew you talked in your sleep, but never like this. He can’t take it anymore. One hand ends up on the hip facing away from the bed, while the other is drawn to your neck, curling to the back to hold you gently as his fingers slide up into your hair.

“Wanna make you feel good too, angel.” He’s guiding you slowly along his thigh, tensing up underneath you; he’s not sure how to wake you up without startling you, and he doesn’t want the building desire to end so soon.

In time with his thoughts, you begin to stir, eyes fluttering open. You blink a couple times, then Steve nudges against your core again, and you keen, throwing your head back into his hand already waiting for you.

“Oh- oh, fuck, oh my god…” You’re growing aware of the situation, realizing your dream is becoming reality so seamlessly. You’re embarrassed, you want to hide away and apologize, but Steve rubs himself against the leg you have pressed against him, releasing a throaty groan; the embarrassment falls away, fast. “St- Steve?”

“Yeah?” He’s trying not to pant this soon, trying not to sound so breathy and needy already.

“M’sorry, I- I didn’t realize that I—”

Steve shushes you softly, bringing your face closer to his as he leans in, noses touching while you’re both making the sweetest noises together. “I can stop, if you want. I- I shouldn’t just assume you want this, maybe it was a silly dream—”

“No, it wasn’t… I really want you, Steve.” Your hands test the waters, sliding up his body, but only over his shirt, before holding his face; your gaze locks with his, and despite the dim glow in the room, you can see the lust ridden look he’s giving you while nodding wordlessly to give his consent. You lean in to kiss him, lips touching ever so slightly; you freeze as self doubt sets in, but he senses it, and kisses you back fully, mindful of your split lip.

It’s slow, almost too slow for you and how wound up you are from the dream, but you do your best to stay patient. Steve’s hand on your hip sneaks under your shirt, just enough that the tips of his fingers brush against your skin, just beneath the hem. The hand cradling the back of your head moves to your jaw, fingers splaying out to get a better hold on you when his lips part against yours. You make some kind of small noise, a muffled yelp that slips into Steve’s mouth when his tongue slips into yours. Distracted by the kiss, your hips stopped rolling, so Steve begins guiding you along his thigh again.

A moan shudders out of you as you pull back to catch your breath. Steve can’t take his eyes off of you as your eyes flutter shut, head falling back as another sweet moan leaves your lips, losing yourself in the pleasure from such a simple action.

You’re not sure when, but your hands made it to Steve’s back, fists bunched up with the fabric of his shirt, not wanting to touch any part of him that might hurt, but needing to grab something.

“Does th- this happen a lot?” He manages to ask, and in his head, he’s rolling his eyes at himself, because he wanted that to sound so much sexier than it did. You’re in a whole different world, though, already blissed out when barely anything has happened yet.

“Mhm,” You open your eyes as you answer, the burning desire low in your body growing hotter as the two of you make eye contact again. “Can I- can we— take this stupid thing off.”

Steve laughs, realizing maybe sexy isn’t what either of you need right now; being best friends already, it only makes sense that the only time the two of you can’t form coherent thoughts laced with lust would be when you’re pressed up against one another for the first time.

Pulling his hands back, he gestures to his shirt in the goofiest way, like he’s Vanna fucking White, showing off a purchased vowel. “You can’t take this seriously, can you?” You’re not mad, in fact, you’re laughing with him, and something about the two of you nervously laughing makes you more comfortable being intimate with your best friend.

“I’m just filling in the blanks for you, angel.” He’s smirking, but he’s also trying to stifle more laughter, so it just comes out as a product of a snicker and a snort.

“Oh, that was real cute,” You tease, reaching for his waist. “Words, words are hard.” You’re grumbling, tugging at the bottom of his t-shirt, carefully pulling it over his head.

“Yeah, don’t hurt yourself thinking too hard.”

Whatever smart-ass retort you had ready to roll off your tongue disappears at the sight of Steve, now shirtless. It’s nothing new to you, you’ve seen him shirtless plenty of times before, but in the moment, you’re hyper aware of how different this is. There’s no going back, but if you were being honest, there was no going back once you moaned his name in your sleep.

“What?” Steve asks, laughter dying down as he watches you reach out to his torso, tracing his scars, both old and the ones just beginning to form.

“You’re so… pretty.”

Steve blushes, a rosy red shade blooms across his face, to the tips of his ears. “I— shut up.”

You scoff, “I’m being honest!” He tugs at the bottom of your shirt, waiting for your permission, but your hands hold his back, shaking your head. Shyly, you state the obvious, “I don’t have a bra on.” Of fucking course you don’t, you never sleep in bras. Even Steve knows that, forever impressed with how you could just unhook that damn thing with one hand so casually and slip out of it, pulling it out of your shirt without ever stripping. It’d take everything in him to hold his jaw from dropping, when you just wanted out of a ridiculously uncomfortable bra.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Steve reassures softly, only to follow it up with, “I don’t either.”

“Alright, that’s it, I’m going back to sleep,” You tease, beginning to roll back over, but Steve grabs you quickly to roll you on top of him instead.

“Like hell you are,” He’s tugging at your shirt again, looking up at you with those sweet doe eyes, filled with wonder and curiosity over what his best friend looks like under everything. “Don’t feel pressured to say yes. We can st—”

You’re pulling your shirt off with a determined speed, like ripping off a bandaid, throwing it on the floor. “I do not look good with these bruises.”

Steve sits up, all humor and admiration draining from his features as he takes in all of the severe bruising you have from a few days ago. “Wh… how— why didn’t you show me? Or tell me? Fuck, I probably made some of them worse—”

“Hey, Steve, it’s okay. Seriously. I’m okay. These are nothing compared to what you ended up with.”

He shakes his head, ghosting his fingers over some of the worst bruises, blooming in the darkest shades of purple and blue he’s ever seen on someone, including himself, and that says a lot. Some are beginning to grow into that sickly yellow, even greenish color.

“What the hell do I have to do or say to convince you that you’re allowed to show me your pain too?” He’s not sure what he’s feeling, he just wishes you said something, wishes he knew so he could care for you properly.

“There’s not much you can do for bruises, Steve.” You shrug. “M’sorry, I just wanted to put you first. You’re always caring for everyone else before yourself, and I wish you’d let someone care for you, too. I want to give you the love and care you give everyone but yourself. These mean nothing to me, I just didn’t want you to be disappointed.”

Steve can’t believe what he’s hearing. “Disappointed? From what? How you look with these? Because I wasn’t kidding when I said you’re still a babe with your face wounds, and that applies here too. You have… no fucking idea how badly I want to get my hands all over you, but I think we should stop. I don’t want to make those more painful than they already are.”

“Steve, I can handle it. I bruise like a peach, anyway.” You’re mentioning it casually, but enjoy the way he blushes at your words, clearly thinking of better reasons to be bruised. You smirk, “Feel free to tuck that fun fact away for another day.”

“I— I’ll bring that back up later.” He murmurs, trying to focus. “Anyway… are you sure?”

Rolling your eyes, you grab his hands, bringing them to your tits roughly. “Does this answer your question?”

Enthusiastically, Steve nods, fingers already toying with your nipples, breathing out, “Fuck yeah it does.” You start giggling until he latches onto one of the sensitive nubs, fingers softly pinching at the other every so often, in between grabbing a handful of you. He groans into your skin, thinking about how long he’s wanted to touch you like this, but it’s better than he imagined.

You’re arching your back as he switches sides, a thread of spit unraveling from his lips that’s still clinging to you; your eyes to roll back as you grind down onto his lap from just the sight alone, fingers twisting into his locks, tugging softly as he sucks, bites, soothes with his tongue, then repeats.

“I need…” You’re gasping, head falling back; Steve takes advantage of your exposed neck, kissing up your chest before leaving small, soft love bites up to your jawline.

“You need… what?” He kisses the corner of your mouth, but you can’t take it slow anymore, you need him now. You grab his face to kiss him, and it’s a little sloppy, a little clumsy, but he leans into it anyway. The two of you find a semi perfect rhythm, one that flows with the way you continue to grind onto him. You nip his bottom lip, tugging on it before letting go, and Steve moans into you.

“Need you, need you right now.” You’re frantically murmuring against his lips.

“We don’t have to rush.” He pulls back, searching your features for any sign that something is off, but all he sees are your lust blown pupils. “I mean, I’m not complaining, but—”

You kiss him quickly before pushing him back against the pillows, shimmying down his body, kissing his scars with care along the way, continuing down until you reach the waistband of his shorts.

“Oh, you don’t have to—”

“Steve, quit being nice for, like, five minutes. Are you okay with this?”

With a gulp he nods, breathing heavily “I— I’m more than okay with this.”

“Thank fuck.” You tug his shorts down, almost drooling as you watch his length spring free, the rounded tip red with desire, leaking precum. “Steve, what the fuck.”

“You’re sending me so many mixed signals tonight, holy shit. Is that … is that good?”

You need to shut your mouth, mind too far in a cock-drunk daze to tease him with words. So, you run your tongue up the underside his cock, broadly, taking your time to reach the head, eyes on him the entire time. Steve yelps on contact, eyes screwing shut as his head falls against the pillow, but he pushes himself to look down at you, bucking against your tongue before you take him in completely.

“Jesus fucking Chri-iiiiiiiist,” He shudders out, hands tangling into your hair as you begin to bob up and down on him. “This… you… hhhhohmygod—”

You pull off with a pop that echoes off the walls, a sound Steve wishes he could’ve recorded to play when he gets off in the future, followed by the sight of you drooling onto his cock as it kicks with need.

“Tell me how you really feel, Steve,” You tease before taking him in again, but he holds your head in place, making you pout. “Am I doing something wrong?”

“No, no, fuck no. Your mouth feels so fucking good, angel, but I need… I…”

“Take your time, babe, it’s okay.” You tease, making Steve groan, both with annoyance and a craving for you to get mouthy, just not now.

“Fuck me, just need you to fuck me, please baby,” He’s babbling as he tugs you back up his body, hands on your hips as you hover above his cock. “Need to feel you, angel.”

You push your shorts down and throw them to the floor with your shirt. “Yeah?” You lightly rub your core against his cock, and he bucks with a desperate whine.

“Yes, please, please—”

Words become nonexistent as you sink down onto him slowly, walls slowly stretching around him, adjusting to his size.

“Knew you w- were big, but not like… not like this.” You’re panting, overwhelmed by the slight pain from taking him to the hilt, but the pleasure is greater, rendering your brain useless. Not a damn thing on your mind except Steve and how fucking good he feels so deep inside of you.

“Fuckfuckfuck,” Steve gasps, grip digging into your hips roughly, knowing he’s just adding to your bruises, but he’ll apologize later. “You’re so— never felt a pussy tighter than yours, angel. M’god, don’t fucking move.”

You giggle, and he glares at you. “Don’t— do not do that either, just… fucking sit there for a second, okay? I’m really not trying to blow my load this early.” You’re doing your best to keep stoic, nodding as you fold your hands and wait patiently. “Oh my god, why are you like this?”

Shrugging, you begin to reply, “Why n— oh!” Steve pulls you down to him roughly, kissing you as he begins to move, fucking you slowly from below. He guides you by the hold on your hips, bouncing you on his cock, causing your eyes to roll back as he moves a hand to the back of your head. Holding you tightly against him, your forehead rests against his as the two of you gasp and pant lewdly onto each other’s lips. You’re riding him like no one else has, to the high fucking heavens, and he swears he’s gonna die a happy man right here, underneath you.

“How often have you dreamt about this?” You shamelessly ask, sitting up and leaning back as you roll your hips, grinding down so he hits your sweet spot just right. Steve’s speechless, flexing up into you, jaw slack as your walls flutter around him. “You’re so pussy-drunk right now, huh?”

A strained “Mhm,” leaves him; he’s not even going to hide how he’s putty in your hands, right now, and as long as you’ll have him. Finally, he rasps, “Fuck, wish we did this sooner.”

“We got all the time in the world to make up for it, Stevie.” Your legs twitch and shake, signaling you’re not far off from your high, but they’re also sore still from days ago, and right now, you’re just making them hurt more. Great cause, of course, but it doesn’t dull the pain, so you’re beginning to slow down. “Fuck, my legs hurt.”

“Oh, no you don’t,” Steve pulls you back down arms wrapped around your back, one hand gripping around his other wrist, keeping you stable as he plants his feet against the bed, fucking up into you with everything he’s got. “It’s okay, angel, I’ve got ya’.” He grunts, hammering into you with so much force, you can’t help but moan loudly, almost screaming, but you bury your face into his shoulder, biting down to muffle your noises as you flutter around him. “Fuck, didn’t think you were so vocal.” At this point, you are screaming, but the noise barely leaves you as you keep your mouth on his skin.

Steve’s hips are starting to stutter, and his cock twitches, needy for release. “Good girl, don’t wanna wake up the whole house, right?” That’s the final push over the edge for you; grabbing Steve’s face, you kiss him deeply to keep quiet. The faint, metallic taste of blood works its way onto your tongue, and you realize your semi-treated split lip is split once again. You pull back, trying to keep as quiet as possible, frantically whispering, “I love you, I love you, fuck, I love you—” Following you into bliss, Steve pulls you back onto his lips as he cums, filling you shamelessly as you still squeeze him, milking him for all he’s got as he’s moaning into you.

When the two of you come down, covered in a sticky sheen of sweat and hearts ready to beat out of your chests, the shame hits fast as he pulls back enough to murmur, “Fuck. I didn’t even ask—”

“Birth control is a beautiful thing, babe.” You smile down at him, breathless. Steve sighs relief, thankful for whoever the fuck created the pill. His eyes fall to your lip before thumb swiping the mess away.

“Shit, m’sorry.”

“Worth it. So fucking worth it.” You giggle before he kisses you softly.

Pulling back, Steve reaches out to cup the side of your face, and you lean into his touch, giddy and exhausted all at once.

He’s admiring the view of you above him, softly replying to your confession, “I love you, too.”

The two of you are basking in the afterglow of one another, beaming and holding each other tight, unable to move just yet. Steve doesn’t mind taking a second to catch his breath, but then a loud bang against his bedroom door startles the both of you.

“About fucking time!” Robin shouts from the other side before walking away. Faintly you hear her huff, “Noisy assholes.” Steve locks eyes with you, both of you stunned and embarrassed before bursting into a fit of laughter together.

“Still worth it?” Steve teases, and you shrug playfully.

“Worth what, the impending shame fest they’re gonna put us through tomorrow morning?” You lean down to kiss him again before replying against his kiss-swollen lips, “Oh, fuck yeah.”

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #Steve Harrington x y/n #steve harrington smut #my fics #prompts #pin back in the grenade

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trashisstillhere · 19 days

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Some Ninja Randy related art I just wanted to post right now. But it’s not just the og, but some different versions of him that I had made long time ago and decided to try drawing again today!

Oh boy, I haven’t thought of these guys in a very long time until now. Some of you who has seen some art from both my old account and the old ones in this account may know of them (expect for Bad Ending!Randy, I never really showed him, I think). And yes, I will kinda explain each one of them since the rest of you probably don’t know about them at all so here we go.

1. Evil! Randy

an evil version of Randy, with all the chaos pearls in his disposal now that the sorcerer is fully gone. And no, not in the way like in the season 2 finale but like…well.. let’s just say, he’s still trapped.

staying in the now abandoned norrisville high school (what happen to everyone in there? No body knows), Evil! Randy is mostly alone by himself, plotting and thinking about what to do next now that everything with him has changed.

If he ever does get a visitor in the school, he seems quite calm and wise towards them, showing them around and even asking them for favours to help him a little around the place, give him company as he haven’t had some in so long…..but don’t be fooled. Remember, those green orbs corrupts whoever has them and this Randy is no different.

Howard’s and the Nomicons whereabouts in this au? currently unknown.

The only new thing about him right now are those few green glowing cracks on his suit and all, I thought those would look cool on him.

——

2. Horror! Randy

Now you can easily find this guys story and first drawings of him on my account. Just click on the Rc9gn tag while staying on my account, scroll far down and you’ll find it. Easy peasy. But if you’re too lazy, I’ll give you a short(er) and quick version.

This Randy’s story takes place back in season 1, right after he just became the ninja and a few days passed. He meets some evil spirit who takes a form of a ninja and tricks him into thinking that it’s from the nomicon and that there’s people who are monsters in disguise’s that he has to ‘get rid of’. Because of this along with illusions from the spirit to make it more believable, he ends up killing lots of innocents, even Howard which he immediately feels tons of regret and guilt for.

At the end, Randy becomes a lonely mess, a lost cause, a paranoid psycho ninja who now can’t tell the difference between an actual monster and a human thanks to the manipulation of the fake ninja spirit who is now suddenly gone along with the illusions.

Basically, this is a fucked up Randy who suffers a lot and is very lonely. He does kill though.

—-

3. Disbelief! Randy

This Randy is kinda based on and inspired by the disbelief Papyrus Undertale Au. But instead of Papyrus with Sans jacket on, it’s the poor ninja boy with Howard’s. Most of this one is just Randy wearing the only thing he has left of his dead friend, trying to avenge him. Who or what got Howard killed? From what I remember (I never wrote any of these guys stories down) it was Mcfist and Viceroy, it was an accident with a robot of theirs. They never meant to have it kill the guy but it just…happen.

Damn, I have two au’s where Howard is dead. Good lord-

—-

4. Bad Ending! Randy

One I have never shown here before.

This was first a ‘what if’ thing. Like what if at the season 2 finale, in the battle between the sorcerer and Randy, it ended up terribly wrong? With Julian and Howard coming in too late, The sorcerer successfully stabs Randy deeply in the chest, making him be the one to lose and slowly die. The last things he got to see and hear at the end is a concerned Julian, a devastated crying Howard and the laughter of his enemy in the background.

After dying with one last breath, Randy ends up in a void. A blank, white, empty void with no one else but him, who is now mostly black and white, expect for the bleeding wound on his chest, a painful reminder of his defeat. Well, the nomicon is with him. However, he can’t communicate with it anymore.

Why? Because the book, that is also lost of color like the boy, seems to be corrupted. Not like evil corruption but just some kind of corruption that keeps it shut and quiet, no glowing, no beeps, nothing, having this sort of ink all over the cover that never stops dripping and keeps its pages sticky and shut tight.

Randy doesn’t understand this and the place he is stuck in but all he does know is he can’t get help anymore and he can’t even get to see what is going on in his home right now, though he assumes that it’s now slowly turning into a chaotic wasteland thanks to the sorcerer. All he can do now is cry and cry, mumbling to himself and getting mad at himself for losing so easily like that, probably even developing self hatred in the process.

There is actually some continuation i made for this with a good ending, where Randy somehow is able to fix the Nomicon, get out of the endless white void, get revived, reunite with Howard along with many others and finally defeat the sorcerer once and for all. Though that one never got finished and from what I remember, it’s not really canon and not a true ending to this au so….oops.

——————

But yeah, these are my Randy Au’s. There is kinda a few more but not really.

#rc9gn #ninja show #rc9gn randy #randy cunningham #randy cunningham 9th grade ninja #ninja #au #evil au #alternative universe #doodles #drawing #fan art #bad ending

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mattodore · 2 months

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a little update on what i've been doing in the sims lately! don't mind the huge walls of text for once i'm saying things in the post instead of the tags lmao

matthias's scars are very slowly coming along! i really love his left leg scar but can't really show all of it because i'd have to get him naked for that and it also wraps around his leg. um, but it starts at the side of his hip and carves down at an angle before abruptly following a steep line to the back of his calf. it looks gnarly which is exactly what i'm trying to achieve with matthias's scars! i'm also pretty pleased with the scars on his wrists and side, but the scar he has on the back of his right leg is... a little too crunchy? i don't know, it just looks weird. it's kind of hard to get the scars i'm making to look good on matthias's body. especially scars that're smaller or delicate... like the instant loss of quality makes me want to chew on exposed wires. but that's where i've left off on them! his arms and back are where he has the most damage but my god... it's SO difficult trying to get scars to look nice over his biceps and back muscles. also the hair ties i made for him look nice on his wrist <3

theo's apartment is also finally in the works. i've got the base layout finished and a general idea of what all the rooms are for. building and decorating isn't actually that daunting to me, surprisingly—instead, what's actually causing me a lot of grief is the realization that this is too big for theo to really be comfortable in. so, i was thinking, okay, that's fine, just get rid of three of the rooms and scale down the living area. only to pause and take into account the fact that theo's parents pay for this. they're controlling and also very big on appearance so i'm not sure they'd be fine with their son living in a shoebox—i mean, what would people say if word got to them that he doesn't even have a walk-in closet? like... that's the kind of people they are. but i wanted theo to feel comfortable in his apartment so now i'm feeling conflicted on how i want it to look. i'm definitely going to scale down the bedrooms and the living area... but it'll still feel too big to theo. there are just too many corners for him to ever fully let his guard down... which, hm... well, maybe that fits the story more anyway.

this is his general aesthetic for the interior btw... i want it to be brown, cream, and green all throughout the apartment with splashes of orange (this mix between his old dorm and his childhood home but with something new blending it together). i really wanted him to have stained glass windows in his kitchen and bathroom but couldn't find any </3 so sadly that's not happening. and i need to find a nice curio cabinet for his collection of bells... along with bells too lmao. but that's where i'm at so far! i'm seriously going to just sit here in build mode for hours just... trying to figure out how to make this place more comfortable for theo. like it's supposed to be where he feels safe but it's just too much rn.

#river dipping #matthias evanoff #theodore doe #echthroi #also if anyone has any tips on getting scars or other skin details to look good let me know please...#i'd love to try projection painting again but my laptop is too slow and i can't get opengl to function on my desktop </3 #like i get an error every time i try to open matthias's .obj and even reddit is failing me on a fix for it <///3 #and okayyy theo's apartment!! i'm so torn up abt it now #but does his bed not look super fucking comfortable...#i might have to change his bed to that queen bed in the guest room just because the one in theo's room is... interestingly colored.#i'm going to recolor it to just plain white/cream sheets... and maybe mess with the mesh a bit. really i should test the bed in game #bc i'm not sure it'll work very well...#i wanted theo to have a wooden headboard but all of the ones i had like that just didn't look like he could nestle into them #he's just. a little guy. if i can't picture theo curling up in the center of the bed then it just won't work #but yeah. that’s my update ☝️#........i'm super excited to start on the home matthias buys shortly after he starts falling in love with theo btw #the floor plan in my head is so beautiful and it's all very open... bc <3 matthias was thinking abt putting theo in his home from the jump #long post

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astelren · 2 years

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Magi HCs to you giving them a surprising kiss on the forehead

ೃ⁀➷ TW/CW: Fluff, With a bit of Angst, Gender Neutral Reader, I talk a little bit of their past nothing too spoilery though?, let me know if I need to add more TW/Tags ♡ Minors please interact with me only by liking or reblogs. ➳ Characters: Kouha Ren, Judar

⤠ None ⤟ Magi Masterlist (soon!) ⤠ None ⤟

Anon requested: Hi dear! How are you? Can I ask you about Judar and Kouha's headcanons where a gender neutral s / o surprise them with a protective kiss on the forehead? Thank you!

Aaaa magi💕💕💕 good memories, good memories... I miss it quite a lot surprisingly, Kouha my sweet boy sigh sob - This is a rewriting of my old work, originally posted on @/severnrsstuff (now severnr0ses).

✧˚ · . Kouha Ren

Well, well. Somebody wants to be romantic, uh? Kouha is surprised and taken aback, he didn’t expect this! Usually, he is the one who protects people or gets attached to people like a koala, not the other way around

So, at first, he’s very confused and taken back, it takes him a while to fully understand what is going on but then Kouha would smirk and hug you really close, giving you little kisses on the face

Telling you how unfair you are!! Don’t surprise him like that, you give him a scare! And now, as payback, he has to kiss aaallll over your face and you can’t complain because Kouha isn’t going to let you go soon anyway!

But, for some reason, he seems a little... off. Did you do something wrong? Before you can ask, however, Kouha starts bragging about how cute you are, how lucky and happy he is to have you.

Everyone that knows him well enough can tell that something is off, but he won’t answer, preferring instead to change the topic, acting like the normal Kouha that everybody knows.

He will probably pout a little bit before demanding other kisses, holding you even closer, waiting for you to kiss him again like you did before. It might become a new routine between you two, with him silently begging you to kiss him once again

Later he’ll watch you sleep right next to him in bed, with a distant look in his eyes. In a way your gentle and kind gesture really made him understand how lucky he is to have you

Poor Kouha it’s not used to be the one being protected, and he is... Weird out over how safe and glad it makes him feel. Sure, his brother protect and help him, but a lot of stuff he had to do it alone.

For once, being the protected one, don’t have to constantly worry about stuff made him feel relaxed, even if it was a little while. Kouha hopes that he makes you feel the same way you do, protected and safe

You should expect him to give you a lot more gifts and cuddles afterward, as a way to constantly tell you how much he appreciates and loves you. Kouha gets worse in his jealousy and protection, only wanting the best for you and making sure you are always safe and secure

✧˚ · . Judar

Judar.exe stopped working. First of all, how dare you kiss him. Second of all, how dare you be this cute.

Judar's brain is trying to understand what happened, and also what he is feeling right now. He’s happy, scared, and lonely. Judar doesn’t remember his parents, and he never really had someone that truly loved or cared about him

And even if he had somebody, he found himself stabbed in the back. There was no point in trusting people, unless Judar wanted to get even more hurt. So his reaction is a mixed one, mainly at first or if the relationship is pretty new

A blush would appear on Judar's face, angrily asking why you always do strange and weird things, commenting on how weird you are, but hugging you closer to his body with his hands slightly trembling.

A brat lmao

He loves the kisses, believe me, but he would never actually show it, especially to you! So you must know him very well to tell that not only did the kiss affect him a lot, but it also made him very happy. Which is pretty obvious.

He kind of expects you to do it pretty often?? Because it makes him feel a lot more safe, secure, and relaxed. Obviously, if you are going to ask he will simply deny and change the topic immediately lol

You made Judar a lot more affectionate (in his own way), possessive, and jealous about you though! He might be a lot more pissed towards you sometimes, in a way he's expecting you to betray him in one way or another

But like you spending too much time with one of the princes is already unacceptable for Judar. How dare you, he’ll throw peaches at both of you with a grunt of his face while clearly pointy more peaches at the other person and not you

Kiss him once again like that and it's fine, he's content and still a bit angry

Sleeping with him is now impossible; mostly because Judar can’t ever let go of you now, having and feeling your body near his it’s making him a lot more relaxed, and will actually wake up if you get up

This work belongs to @/astelren, do not repost, translate, copy, rewrite or share on tiktok without my permission. Reblogs are appreciated and encouraged♡

#magi x reader #kouha ren x reader #judar x reader #judal x reader #magi judar x reader #magi kouha x reader #magi the labyrinth of magic x reader #kouha x reader #magi judal x reader #magi kouha ren x reader #magi the labyrinth of magic judar x reader #ren kouha x reader #🌹 ── my.writing #🌹 ─ magi.writing

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so-long-soldier-writes · 13 days

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Gorgeous

kai parker x reader (both 18+!) (shy!virgin!kai)

summary: troubled by his own body, kai's afraid to go all the way with you. that is, until you confess you love him regardless of the way he looks, giving him just the confidence he's needed all along.

tags: friends to lovers, kissing, minor fingering, shy!kai, mentions of child abuse / physical abuse [I can't just write a normal fic, can I?], implied s3lf h4rm, emotional hurt / comfort, confessions, making out, blow jobs, virgin!kai, top / bottom switching, reader is a little freaky, nipple sucking, pet names, aftercare, cuddling

word count: 5.5k

a/n: sooooo... this has been sitting in my wips for over a year. for some reason, i just never posted it. but unfortunately, i have work tomorrow, so i'll be dead as a doornail that evening, and the work i wanted to post isn't done yet, so i'll post this in the meantime. that being said, i think i'm finally starting to get back in the swing of things. i'm still working on requests as well as other stuff, but i'm coming back slowly!

also, if this idea is totally unusual, that's probably why it sat in my drafts for a year. it's a year old fluffy smut with a strange premise. bare with me. 😅

The minute you get back from work, you collapse onto the nearest chair and groan.

“You okay there?”

Looking up, you see Jo and her boyfriend on the couch watching a movie. Oops.

“Sorry. Yeah. Long day. Where is everyone?”

“Our dads went to the flooding company people to try and get that situation covered, and our moms took the kids to the park.”

“My brother too?”

“Your brother, but not mine.”

“Cool,” you give the girl a thumbs up. “Hey Cody.”

Jo’s boyfriend looks over at you, “hey, Y/N.”

“Alright, I’m gonna go shower.”

“Okay!”

You make your way up the stairs slowly, wondering where Kai is. Poking your head in his room, you see he’s not in there, but you don’t hear him anywhere else. Oh well. You’ll find him after your shower, because you really, really need that shower.

In your room - also the Parker’s guest room - you grab a new set of clothes and your hairbrush, before going into the guest bathroom in the hallway. See, you and the Parkers are neighbors and have become close family friends. Though one night after a really bad storm, your basement flooded, as did several other houses nearby. This is a problem Mr. Parker could easily fix with magic, but considering the electric and flooding companies know your house was one of the ones affected, he can’t do anything without revealing his coven. Instead, your family temporarily moved in with his until the county could fix the issue.

It’s been two weeks, no progress. But you’re not complaining; you get to spend more time with Kai - your best friend who you’ve recently started dating in secret.

As you’re busy undressing and getting the water ready, you don’t hear Kai come in from outside. The boy stands in the kitchen, staring at nothing in particular.

“Is everyone still out?” He hesitantly asks Jo.

“Yeah. But Y/N came home.”

“Oh. Where is she?”

“Mhm, went upstairs.” Then she snaps her fingers, “oh wait! She said she’s taking a shower. So don’t bother her. Just go to your room and wait for her to come out. Don’t be weird.”

Kai scrunches his nose. As if he’d ever make you uncomfortable on purpose. “Okay, thanks.”

Quietly, he makes his way upstairs. When he hears the water running, he bites his lip. Don’t be weird, Jo had just said. But she doesn’t know how close you two actually are. Swallowing hard, he slowly turns the knob to the bathroom door, trying not to alert Jo to which door he’s opening. Inside, the hot water steams up the mirrors, making it hard to see, but he can vaguely point out your figure through the glass.

“Y/N?”

You hear him and pop your head out of the door, “Kai! Hi. Come in,” you gesture for him to enter all the way.

He does, then shuts the door just as quietly. “I don’t mean to bug you, I just wanted to make sure you were here. Jo said you were, but…” he shrugs.

“You’re not bugging. Come on, join me.”

“What?”

“In here.”

“But… I’m wearing jeans.”

“Well then take them off, you goof.”

“I-I… um.”

Deciding to give him privacy, you stick your head back in the shower and rinse out the shampoo. The whole time you’re finishing your shower routine, you assume Kai’s going to join you at any time. You haven’t gone that far in your relationship yet, but he is a teenage boy, and he does love kissing you every chance he gets.

You two have done more than kissing, of course, but just haven’t gone all the way. And there’s plenty of reasons for that: too many people in this damn house, someone might walk in, someone might overhear, etc. etc. etc. But aside from the obvious reasons, you can’t help but feel like there’s also reasons that Kai isn’t sharing.

He likes to spend a lot of your time together practically worshipping your body. His lips and fingers have touched nearly every part of you, but he isn’t too keen on letting you do the same.

Kai holds you in place with a hand on your neck. His lips are attached right below, sucking hard enough to leave a mark. His other hand’s busy farther down - two fingers pumping in and out of you quickly. You bite your lip hard to not moan as you cum on his hands. He continues to finger fuck you through your orgasm, not letting up until your body stills. Then, he tastes one finger before putting the second in your mouth. You suck on it, eyes trained on him the whole time.

“My turn. Let me make you feel good, Kai.”

“You are. I like watching you like this.”

“No, I know. But I want to taste you, too. Let me blow you.”

Kai bites his lip as if he’s having an internal debate. “Isn’t this so much better, though?” Before you can say anything else, he kisses you, feeling his hands up and down the sides of your body as he does. “Now let me cuddle you, m’kay? Let me take care of you.”

You’re too overwhelmed in pleasure to fight, and succumb to his open arms. Minutes later, you’re both asleep.

You don’t pry if he tells you ‘no’ the first time, but of course, you can’t help but wonder why he’s never let you even see his body.

“Take your shirt off, why am I the only one exposed?” You joke, pulling at the hem.

“Hmph, no, baby, I’m too focused on you,” he says.

Every time. He won’t even take his bracelets off, let alone any of his clothes. Again, you don’t push him - he’ll take that step when he’s ready - but you really want to pleasure him the same way he does you. And besides, he just has to be hot under there; his face is insanely attractive, arms are strong, and figure is lean. You’re dying to know.

“Y/N?” His voice snaps you from your thoughts.

“Mhm?”

“I, um, actually nevermind.”

“You okay, angel?”

“Yeah, just…”

Done with your shower, you turn off the water and grab your towel. You would just go out nude despite him there, but you know the air will be cold, so you wrap the blue cloth around your body. “Well now I’m done.” Carefully, you open the door and step off the slippery floor.

In front of you, Kai is standing awkwardly. His jeans are still on, but his shirt is off and folded neatly on the bathroom counter. You gulp the minute you see his body for the first time. As you expected, he’s lean and rather well-toned for someone not allowed out of his house much. His arms have some muscle to them, and you can see several prominent veins close to the surface of his skin. What catches your eye most, however, is the sharp v-line shaping his hips, leading to somewhere still hidden from your sight. “Fuck,” you mutter under your breath.

Kai swallows hard. His eyes are red. You don’t notice the signs of discomfort, though, until a small sigh escapes his lips.

You narrow your eyes when you hear him. “What's wrong, pumpkin?” Hurrying towards him, you cup the sides of his face. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

“I hate it.”

“Hate what?”

“Hate my body.”

“What do you mean? You’re gorgeous, Kai.”

“All the ew, all the stupid… everything.”

“What are you talking about? I don’t see anything ‘ew’.”

“Look closer.”

“Are you sure? If you’re uncomfortable, I won’t.”

“Just do it.”

Nervous, you step back to look at him closer. “Oh,” you mutter, suddenly saddened. Discolored skin in shades of green, yellow, and purple. Bruises, new and old. Handprints, whip marks, slaps from an open palm, all fading from red. Then there are the cuts, up and down his arms, some on his stomach, some on his shoulders. Clearly self-inflicted, though the bruises were all clearly marks of abuse.

“Now you see how ugly I really am.”

“No, no, Kai…” Gently, you run a finger across a row of evidential abuse. He flinches a little and you can’t help the tear that falls from your eyes. “You’re still gorgeous, baby.”

“Hm,” he mutters, shaking his head ‘no’.

“Shh, shh, you’re okay. I promise. You are still beautiful to me. And I still want you, I still want every inch of your body. You don’t have to hide from me. Hey, I have some, too.”

You peel the towel away a bit to expose several cuts along your upper arm.

He sniffs, “those weren’t there the other day.”

“I know, baby. But yesterday was really hard with my dad, and this was the only way I could think of to cope.”

Kai remembers yesterday. Your dad had forced you to go out with him to visit different universities in the area. By the time you both got back, he was fuming and you were holding back tears.

“He got pissed at me when I said I didn’t want to go to college. He asked me why I was the family failure, and why I couldn’t be more like him.”

“I’m sorry, Y/N.”

“It’s okay. I’m okay, now that I’m back beside you.”

“He’s a dick. Your brother’s a dick.”

“My point is, Kai, that we have a lot of the same scars. You don’t think I’m any less beautiful because of them, so why should you think that about yourself?”

“Because I also have bruises from my fucking dad.”

“That’s not your fault, baby. Your dad is an even bigger dick than mine. And just because you have wounds on your body from his hand doesn’t mean I don’t love you or your body any less.”

Kai freezes, “you love me?”

You then freeze, too. “I, um…” Then you realize that that confession may be exactly what he needs to hear. “Yes. I do love you, Kai.”

Tears that were welling in his eyes are now falling, “why?”

“Why? Why not? Because on top of being absolutely gorgeous, you’re an amazing friend and boyfriend. You’re sweet and gentle and trying your best despite the awful circumstances you’ve been given. You’re always there through the good and bad, and I could never get tired of being with you.”

“Can I admit that I love you, too?”

You smile and nod happily before leaning in quickly to kiss him. Amidst your excitement, your towel falls from your body, and your breasts rub up against his bare chest. Kai lets out a moan at the contact, but then separates from the kiss to cover his mouth with his hand. You just raise your eyebrows at him.

“Feel good?”

Instead of answering, his hands find your breasts and feel them. His eyes roll back in his head. “So soft,” he mutters.

“Kai?”

“Hm?”

“Does this mean I can see you now?”

“Um, I, n- uh-” he stutters over every word.

“You know what? It’s okay. Later?”

“Okay.”

“Sounds good. And I hate to say it, but we have to stop,” you pause to pull on your panties and jeans, “because Jo will start getting suspicious soon,” you have to ignore Kai’s pouting face as you put on your bra, “and she doesn’t need to see us like this, because she’ll tell your dad.” Your shirt is on next, “and then my dad. And then you’ll get hurt.” He watches you pull your hair out from under your shirt and flip it to curl around your face, “and you’re not getting hurt on my watch. Okay?”

Kai nods, “I love you.”

“I love you, too, pumpkin.” You two share another kiss before leaving the bathroom. Kai grabs his shirt on the way out, fumbling to put it on, along with his multiple bracelets. “Downstairs? I need some water.”

“Sure.”

The minute you reach the last step, Jo calls out to you, “did Kai find you?”

“Yeah, he’s here.”

“Okay. He came in a little bit after you went up. I told him you were in the shower, but not to bother you. He listened to me, right?”

“He didn’t bother me at all. Was very gentlemanly and waited in his room for me to come out.” You wink at Kai as you lie straight to Jo’s turned face. Luckily, she’s fixated on the movie.

“Okay, good.”

“I’m just going to get a drink and then we’ll be out of your hair shortly.”

◇◇◇◇

“Y/N, are you sure you don’t want to come with us? It’s a huge festival, it’s a lot of fun,” Mr. Parker asks one more time as he’s halfway out the door.

You take another glance at the amount of people crowding the doorway: your brother and parents, plus Kai’s parents and all his siblings. Minus him, of course. “I’m sure. I’m not too big on crowds, and I’m kinda tired. Might just see if Kai wants to watch a movie.”

“Okay, but be careful.” Then, Mr. Parker leans closer to whisper in your ear. The gray hairs of his beard lightly touch your skin, making you shiver in fear. “And don’t get too close to him.”

“Noted.”

“We should be back around three-ish, more or less,” your Dad adds.

“Okay.”

“Don’t leave the house, and certainly don’t let him sneak out,” Mr. Parker piggy-backs off your dad’s comment. Jeez, it’s like they’re long-lost irritating brothers.

“I won’t. He’ll stay here with me.”

“But not too close, becau-”

“I heard it the first time, Dad. I trust Kai enough that we’ll be fine for a couple of hours. Go have fun, okay?” You had to downplay your friendship to make them think you only trusted him a little. If they knew the truth - that you’d trust him with your life - they’d definitely stage an intervention and never let you see each other again.

“Okay, just making sure. See you later, Y/N.”

“Bye.”

Finally, they leave. It takes ten minutes for nine kids to assemble between two cars, between the Parkers’ van and your parents’ SUV, but they eventually make it work. You can literally hear two kids crying over “having to sit in the back again”, but then you hear your Dad’s voice, “ride with me, if it’s okay with your Dad.” The crying ceases at last, and the cars pull out of the gate.

“Are they gone yet?” Kai comes downstairs about a minute after they left.

“Just pulled out. What were you doing?”

He swallows, “um.” While struggling to answer, you give him a look. “I’m used to hiding during the van-packing process.”

“Okay,” you answer, not entirely convinced.

He bites his lip, “okay, that part is true. I do hide when they do that because sometimes someone storms back in to grab something to appease the ones stuck in the back, like a snack or whatever. But, um, what I was actually doing was… trying to,” he pauses, and you let him find the words, “build up the courage to, um… can I just kiss you?”

You’re confused, but you’ll never deny him a kiss. Smile forming on your lips, you close the three foot gap between you two, hands tracing his jawline, capturing his face, while kissing him softly. His hands find your waist, gripping your hips. There’s something different about this kiss than your usual ones. Something more hungry… willing, maybe. Whatever it is, you let him take charge.

As soon as the shift in control changes, he spins the both of you around so that you’re pressed into the counter, rather than himself, while he kisses you deeper. His lips leave your mouth to trail down your jaw, to your neck, but then he suddenly stops to look up at you.

“Everything okay?”

“Can we go upstairs?”

“Of course.” You joke, “afraid someone’s gonna walk in?”

He misses your teasing tone and replies bluntly, “no, I wanna fuck you.”

You nearly trip up the first stair, causing you to grab a tight hold of his hand. “What’d you say?”

“Is that okay?”

“I-uh-um- yes, just caught me off guard. What brought it on?”

“You said you loved me. And that you liked my body even with all the scars. And that if I can love yours with scars, you can love mine.”

“I did say that. I meant every word.”

“And so now we’re here alone, and I’m going to act on something I’ve wanted to do a long time ago.”

You reach the top of the stairs. He has an arm around your back to prevent you from falling, just in case, as he stares into your eyes for hesitancy. You give none. “Then do it.”

Instantly, your back collides with the hallway wall and he kisses you with the same tenacity he did downstairs. Out of habit, your hands find his hair; his, your waist, but he’s a lot more confident now. Slowly, he inches the both of you towards his door. His hand fumbles with the knob, making him frustrated.

“Wish I could just open the stupid thing with magic.”

“If I had magic, I’d let you take it whenever,” you answer, again, with no hesitancy.

He stops to stare at you. “You would?”

“Mhm. I mean it, Kai, I love you.”

“But the siphoning hurts.”

You shrug, “can’t hurt that bad. I imagine it’d probably actually feel good. At least for me, maybe not other people. Send little tingles all the way down to my-”

He cuts you off with an open mouthed kiss. “Now I really wish you had magic.”

“-and then a part of me would kinda be in your blood, too, right?” You finish the second part of what you wanted to say.

“Holy fuck, you’re turning me on.”

“Open the door, Kai,” you urge.

He finally does, but in the second you take to catch a breath, he’s back on you. He takes advantage of your state and slips his tongue in your mouth, no regard for anything but his and your pleasures. You go weak in his arms and let him explore, enjoying the feeling much more than you probably should. Then, he taps on your hips signaling for you to jump. You do, wrapping your legs around his waist. He carries you to the bed, finally, and throws you down rather roughly.

Immediately, panic takes over his face. “Shit, that was way harder than I meant to! You okay?”

You, on the other hand, can’t get a word out because you’re giggling too hard.

“Y/N, are you okay?” He tries again.

“You’re so hot when you’re all dominant. Well, you’re always hot, but-” and then you continue to giggle.

Kai relaxes, realizing he didn’t hurt you. “Oh you little-” he climbs on top of you until he’s hovering over your face. Legs tangle together, bodies close but not close enough… You buck your hips. There, now they’re close enough. “You’ve been wanting this,” he observes, fighting back a moan at the contact.

“Yes, but also, your comfort is my number one priority. It’s much better now, with you enjoying it too, than if we were to try when you weren’t ready.”

“Thank you, princess,” he kisses your nose sweetly.

“Thank you for trusting me. One thing though.”

“Mhm?”

“Do you trust me right now?”

“Of course.”

“Good.” Without further warning, you grab his wrists and flip him over so that his back is pressed into the bed. It’s the first time you’ve ever been on top of him, and the power makes you giddy.

“I thought you liked me being dominant?”

“Oh, I do. But I also want to see you writhe under me,” you wink at him.

Kai gives you a look, and you know he’s going to start fighting any minute now. It’s in his eyes, and you can feel his muscles under you tensing to build up the strength. In the last second before you think he’s going to try and take charge, your hand goes down to the outline forming in his jeans. All fight is immediately gone as soon as you start to feel him. He can’t even fight the moan he’s been holding back since you started making out downstairs. The sound spurs you on and you rub him harder.

“More, princess. Please.”

You move your legs to straddle him, hands going to his belt. “This okay?”

“Mhm.”

“Words, please.”

“What am I, five?”

You cock your head at him. “Words, or no further touching.”

“Princess,” he tries to buck his hips like you did, but you’re holding him down.

“Come on, Malachai.”

“Don’t use that name.”

“Mala-”

“Fine! Yes, please. It’s okay. Please.” You smirk, not expecting the begging, but loving it. “You little sadist.”

That only makes you love it more. Not wasting another second, your hands are undoing his belt. As much as you want to take it slowly, you’re both too excited to drag it out any longer. Besides, just by looking at him, you can see how hard he is, and you know you’re almost soaking your panties with wetness.

“Wait,” he pants.

You stop immediately. “You okay?”

“I need… I need. C’mere,” he beckons you forward, and you listen. “Need this off,” he pulls off your shirt. “And this,” next is your bra. The minute it’s off, he loses control and grabs your tits like he did in the bathroom a couple days earlier. Before you know it, he’s fondling one while the other’s in his mouth.

“If mine is, this is coming off, too.” You make a grab for his shirt. He pauses, tongue still around your nipple. “Is that okay?”

“Yes,” he seems to decide in that instant.

In order for you to pull the fabric over his head, he has to disconnect his mouth from your breast. But when it’s off, he swallows hard and doesn’t reach for them again.

“Kai… c’mon, pumpkin.” You take his hand to put it back on your body, trying to return that sense of comfort, but he doesn’t grasp your breast again. Sighing, you take it as a moment to get a closer look at his body. The bruises, the scars, everything. A tear escapes your eye, and you lean down to press a kiss to one of the purplish wounds. Then, you start to do that with all of them. From his neck to his hips, you kiss every mark made on his body, whether by his dad’s hand or his own. On the fresher ones, your lips are more gentle, barely there, not wanting to cause him more pain. But on the older ones, you leave multiple kisses, or even lick them with your tongue before kissing. “I meant it, Kai. You’re gorgeous. These marks don’t stop me from loving you.”

Slowly, he makes eye contact with you again. His hands reach out to your face, and when he gets a hold of you, he pulls you in for another deep kiss on his lips. “What did I do to deserve you?” He asks with a tear emerging.

“You don’t have to deserve love, baby.” You kiss his collarbone.

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.” Your lips travel to his chest. Giving him a taste of his own medicine, you swirl your tongue around one of his nipples. He moans loudly, arching his back.

“Holy shit, I didn’t know that would feel that good.”

“Can I continue to make you feel things like that?”

“Yes, please. I need it, I need you. Wait, but let me-” he suddenly sticks two fingers into your wet heat, hovering over his own body, and pops them in his mouth. “You taste so good.”

“Are you gonna let me taste you now?”

“Sure. Yes. I meant yes.”

Your eyes warm and you continue to kiss him further down - this time, trailing his v-line. You had noticed the prominent indents the other day, but are now getting to see it up close. He moans again, enticing you more.

“Princess.”

“I’m working on it.” Finally, you shrug his jeans down and off his body. You can tell he’s fighting the urge to hide his now-bare legs, but you opt to not pay attention to them anyway. Your gaze goes straight to the bulge in his boxers that looks even thicker without his jeans in the way. Mouth watering, you touch him first, enjoying the feeling.

“Y/N, please. It’s uncomfortable. Too tight.”

Succumbing to his wishes, you tap his hips for him to lift them, then peel back the final confinement. His cock springs out, slapping his stomach in the process. You’re quick to lean forward and lick a stripe from the base to the tip. Kai sinks his head into the pillow, groaning huskily. After pulling his boxers all the way off, you refocus your attention back to the length in front of you.

“Fuck, you’re gorgeous,” you mutter. The praise makes him twitch, and you immediately reach out to grasp him between two of your fingers. “Need to taste.” And then you finally do. You start at the tip, rolling your tongue over the slit counter clockwise, stimulating precum in the process. Some of it leaks into your mouth, straight down your throat, but most of it drips down the side of cock. It doesn’t get far, though, before you move your head to catch it, licking your way from the base to the tip, again.

A shiver runs through his body. “Feels so good.” Barely audible, but you hear him.

Positioning your head over him, you prepare to take him fully. To you, it’s a five second break of deep breaths, but to Kai, overwhelmed in pleasure, there’s almost no warning. As soon as you’re ready, you sink your mouth down on him until you get about halfway and your gag reflex kicks in. Cock hitting the back of your throat, you gag around him.

“Y/N, you okay?” He sits up on his elbows, worried he’d accidentally hurt you.

Slowly, you lift your head back up, “I’m good, baby. Just training my throat to take you.”

He swallows so hard that you see his Adam’s apple bob. “Oh, um…” He doesn’t lay back down, opting to watch you instead.

You don’t mind as you go down for a second time, getting further now. You do it several times, taking more and more of him each time. Your tongue swirls around his length and traces his veins. In fact, there’s one vein in particular that especially makes Kai moan every time you hit it. It’s on the underside of his cock, and you start to pay special attention to it. The rest of his length sits against your face as you focus on it.

Kai doesn’t know if the sight or the feeling is affecting him more. Either way, he feels himself getting close to release. Your mouth is around him, head bobbing up and down rapidly, when he twitches. He whines, resisting the urge to hold your head where he wants. Suddenly, though, you stop and remove your mouth completely.

“Fuck, wait, I’m about to…”

“I know, pumpkin. Can’t let you do that yet.”

He’s about to ask why, but then sees his answer. In one quick motion, you’re removing your own pants and lining your bodies together. “Ready?”

“Mhm. Yes.”

You smile, grab his cock to hold it upright, then sink your heat down onto him. Kai collapses, elbows no longer supporting him, as pleasure consumes him.

“You okay?”

“Yes, oh- oh god.”

“Can I move? I’ll start slow.”

“Please.”

As promised, you slowly begin to ride his length. Your hands rest on either side of his body and lips are pressed to his chest, leaving hot kisses all over his skin.

“Let me know if you want to try and take over.”

“Okay.”

When Kai starts to relax, you pick up the pace. Not too fast, but little by little. Soon, his hands find your hips and he helps guide you. His fingers have a tight grip on you, but it only makes you wetter.

“I think, I wanna… wanna try…”

“Want to be on top, angel?”

“Mhm.”

“Okay. You can just flip us or I can move, what are you feeling?” But the hungry look in his eyes already gives you your answer.

As soon as you nod and grab onto his shoulders, he flips the both of you so that you’re now pressed into the bed. With his usual role re-established, so does his dominance. You open your legs wider to give him more access, and he immediately takes advantage of it. With a lick of his lips, he pushes his cock into you, not stopping until he’s run out of length.

“Oh my god,” you mutter.

“Is it too much?”

“No, you’re perfect. Move when you’re ready, mmkay?”

He nods, then copies the way you rode him when he begins to move: arms on your side, head ducked into your chest. His lips attach to your nipples, sucking, and pulling them between his teeth. When he gets a hold of his balance, you feel pressure on your clit, too.

“Fuck, Kai. You’re so good.”

His body jolts, “say it again.”

“What?”

“Name. Say it again.”

“Kai,” you pant as he quickens pace.

“No one else is home baby, say it louder.”

You had forgotten this fact, actually, but the minute he reminds you, you let yourself go. “Fuck,” you moan, rather loudly, “feels so good, Kai! Fuck. Harder.”

He spreads your legs wider and thrusts harder upon request. Obscene sounds fill the room, mixed with your moans and whimpers.

“Kai,” you pant, “need to hear you, too.”

“I’d rather hear you, Princess.”

“Aw, come on, gorgeous. Nothing turns me on more than men moaning,” you admit. “Need to hear you.”

Previously held-back grunts and groans tumble from his mouth at your confession. When his lips return to your nipple, he makes sure to keep up with your request, sending vibrations throughout your body.

“I’m close, Kai. So close, so close… don’t stop what you’re doing.”

“I’m getting there, too,” he twitches again. “Come for me, Princess.”

As soon as he asks, your orgasm rips through your body. Loud moans follow, and your eyes roll back in your head. Kai rides you through yours, before pulling out and immediately releasing all over your face and chest. Some drips off your shoulders, down to the bedsheets.

The minute he catches his breath, a worried expression takes over his face, “I’m sorry! I knew I shouldn’t do it inside you, but wasn’t sure where else to. I aimed for your chest and misfired.”

You make direct eye contact with him, then swipe a bunch off your cheek with your finger before sucking it off. “Oh, I’ll never complain about a facial.” You dart your tongue out to the side to gather more. “And don’t worry, I kinda like the taste. How the hell were you a virgin, Kai?! You were amazing the whole way through!”

He blushes, “um, thank you.”

You can’t help but giggle. Only Kai would be sweet enough to thank you for complimenting his sexual ability. Your ex-boyfriend, to whom you had lost your virginity, threw you an, “I know,” when you told him he was good. This little fact just made you love Kai even more.

Then, as if he couldn’t get more perfect, his next words are, “can I clean you up now, Princess? And then we can cuddle and nap?”

“Of course. Give me a kiss first.”

Kai leans forward and kisses you sweetly. His tongue sweeps over your bottom lip, wetting it gently.

“Blood,” he comments.

“Hm?”

“There’s blood on your lip.”

You run your own tongue along it, “must’ve bit it in pleasure.”

“I’ll be right back, okay?” He pulls on a loose pair of sweatpants from his drawer, giving you a wink.

“Okay, darling.”

Two minutes later, Kai returns with a warm rag and a water bottle. First, he cleans the small sore and any remaining blood off your lip, then hands you the bottle. “Drink,” he insists. As you do, he moves the rag over your face and down your neck and chest, cleaning off his drying cum. He rubs your lower body next, easing some of the soreness as well as wiping away your cum. “Anywhere else?”

“No, I’m okay. Do you need anything?”

“Just you,” he sappily replies.

“Okay, come here then.” Arms wide open, you gather him up and pull him close. You take a hand away for a split-second to pull the blankets over you two, earning a whine before he realizes what you’re doing. As soon as your arm is back around him, he snuggles into your body. “I love you, Kai,” you whisper with your lips against his cheek.

“I love you, too, Princess. Thank you for making me feel like I’m worth something to someone.”

As much as his words sadden you, they also make you feel warm inside. You’re the one that makes him feel that way, and that’s pretty fucking special.

“Always, my sweetheart.” You give him a kiss to the cheek, keeping your lips there even afterwards. His heartbeat slows into a comfortable rhythm and breathing evens out, and soon, he’s fast asleep in your arms.

#malachai parker x reader #kai parker x reader #kai parker fluff #kai parker smut #tw: child abuse #tw: s3lf h4rm mentions #tvd fanfiction #virgin kai parker #shy virgin kai - my favorite flavor 😂😅

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aidaronan · 5 months

Text

✨Fic Writing Review 2023✨

Tagged by the incomparable @greatunironic and my beloved @wynnyfryd.

Words and Fics

58, 889 words published on ao3

Plus at least 14,975 or so words of unpublished things that are started and incomplete.

At least 30 new ideas and/or WIPs.

8 published fics on ao3 + some new additions to the drabble/ficlet collection + many tumblr fics/microfics

One completed collab with @sparkle-fiend and one collab (two really) with @sparklyslug in the works

Two monsterfucker fics influenced by the Steddie FanExpo NoLa crew and getting crossfaded as fuck in the French Quarter after meeting Guiseppe Quintilliano.

Top 3 by kudos

Cassiopeia, Orion, Bootes (aka he was a gator boi) Like I Always Do (post-starcourt hurt comfort) Nothing Hurts (Like Your Mouth) (oops! all monsters. vamp eddie and were steve banging in a mausoleum)

Fandom Events in 2023

Lex's Spicy Six Spring Fanworks Challenge

Multiple @steddiemicrofic challenges: read here.

Upcoming Projects

Two Stranger Things Reverse Big Bang fics. Hilariously, neither of them are Steddie as the main pairing, but I think at least one is likely to hit novella length. I can't say a lot due to secrecy, but I feel safe saying one is a gen fic and one is f/f.

One tiny baker!steve/rockstar!eddie collab with @sparklyslug, hopefully out this holiday season.

One bigger collab with @sparklyslug in the spring if we keep our enthusiasm together long enough.

Will keep trying to plug away at the witches fic. I have, admittedly, lost some enthusiasm for them but I do know where the story is going. If you love this one, please be loud at me but in a non-demanding way lmao. I need you.

Two Fandom Trumps Hate fills of at least 10k for @withacapitalp and my dearest, Andi.

Eddie Bio project.

???Who Knows??? But there will probably be monstercock involved.

Some personal chat, rules, and tags under the cut.

Doing some oversharing because I'm starting to think it's vital that we all are honest about our struggles so we don't feel alone and so we know we're not failures. We're just people.

It's been a low production year for me. It's been a difficult year in general, but sometimes change is hard even when it's change you need.

Over half my year was eaten up with job hunting, moving, and trying to adjust while feeling the depressive effects of not having a local friend/support network yet or enough money for whatever the fuck the economy is, esp in this area relative to my salary. A good deal of my body of works for 2023 were written pre-move. Hell, a good deal of them were written in the first quarter. (Which, btw, shout out to anyone else who often feels a bittersweet sort of regret at not being productive in the current internet environment where you feel like you're old news if you can't keep up an unsustainable output. I love you, same, it's prob not true anyway, and here are 200 forehead kisses. <33) All of that said, I'm feeling much better lately. I've been reading again. Writing again. Feeling like I'm living again. I'm looking forward to another arbitrary border of time and on filling that border with joy, especially queer joy and weird joy and the intersection of both of those. As they say: let's fucking gooo.

I still love it here. I know steddie won't be forever for me, just like other ships before them weren't forever for me. But I'm having fun and have been really enjoying some of the connections made in this little sandbox.

On that note:

Rules: Feel free to show whatever stats you have. Only want to show Ao3 stats? Rock on. Want to include some quantitative info instead of stats? Please do this. Want to change how yours is presented? Absolutely do that. Would rather eat glass than do this? Please do eat glass, I’ve heard it’s good for your gums. Tagging, even though I know some people have already been tagged: @sparklyslug, @wormdebut, @banannabethchase, @just-my-latest-hyperfixation @messessentialist @rainbow-nerdss @plutosrose @thefreakandthehair and anyone else. @ everyone who keeps this fandom rippin' and roarin', kissing you, kissing you, kissing you

#fic writer things #fanfiction #year in review

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georgie-weasley · 3 months

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Deep Wounds: Chapter 1.5

Warnings: A wee bit of self loathing from Remus, mentions of scars

Word Count: 1.1k

Pairing: eventual Remus x fem!healer!reader

A/N: So it has been a while since I posted anything about this series so to refresh, there will be smaller chapters like this one in-between each of the longer chapters. The smaller chapters generally won't focus on the reader and mostly Remus instead. As of now I'm still tagging everyone that's on my Remus taglist but if people want I'll make a separate one just for the series

Series Masterlist Taglist

Remus laid on the couch, his arm covering his eyes. He could hear his friends whispering about him only a few feet away. They often talked about him and his condition in hushed tones like it was some sort of secret but there was no point. Remus knew what kind of monster he was; they didn’t need to pretend he didn’t. “Can you stop pretending I’m not here and speak at a higher volume so I can decipher what you’re saying?”

The whispering stopped at once. Remus peaked out from behind his arm to see the group of four moving from the doorway to surround him in the living room. Sirius lifted Remus’s legs and sat down, resting the werewolf’s feet on his lap. James and Peter sat on the floor while Lily stood behind the couch and busied herself looking at the new scars forming on Remus.

“Want to fill me in on your secrets?” Remus whispered, moving his arm so Lily could look at his face. Since she found out about his monthly issue, she had taken on a sort of motherly role. She was always checking on him and trying to feed him and do her best to help heal him but that was never her strongest magic. But it was nice to have her care so much for him even if he didn’t want to bother her.

“James was just filling us in on your trip to St. Mungos.” Sirius let the silence hang after he answered. Remus kept his eyes closed but he could feel everyone looking at him. When no one else spoke, Sirius continued. “Are you really going to let some random girl help you find a cure?”

Remus sighed and sat up with a groan, causing Lily to rush into the kitchen to grab some ice. “No, I’m not. I had no choice though since James wouldn’t leave me alone.”

“That’s going to be awkward.” Lily handed Remus the ice before she took a seat next to him on the couch. “James said she’s coming over here after her shift.”

Remus put the ice on his right shoulder, sinking into the couch. “When she gets here I’ll tell her that I changed my mind and she can leave. I don’t need her help. I have you guys and that’s all I need. There’s no reason for some random girl to give me pity and spend her time and my time making a cure that won’t work.”

“Why not?” Peter spoke up from the floor. “She wants to help so why not let her.”

“I don’t know her Wormtail. I don’t know a single thing about her besides the fact that she seems to think she can help me. She could be doing this because she has pity or because she thinks this will get her points in the medical field.” Remus felt like he was making fair points but the look on James’s face told him it wasn’t enough.

“Moons, I think we all know why you don’t want to accept help.” Remus watched James and shook his head. “I think you’re scared to be let down.”

Remus quickly stood, ignoring the way his body screamed in protest from the quick movements. He didn’t want to sit around and hear James’s ridiculous ideas. James may be one of his best friends but he didn’t know a single thing about this life that he was forced to have. He needed a walk, he needed air, he needed to get away from everyone for just a minute. It’s only been a few hours since he was out of control of his body and attacked by a hippogriff and forced to go to the hospital where a healer refused to take care of him because of what he is. Not to mention a random healer decided to wedge her way into his life to try and help him for whatever reason. He needed a nap.

Remus headed out to the small backyard and collapsed onto a plastic chair. He closed his eyes and felt like maybe he could relax for a few minutes before the door slid open and Lily walked out. Remus grew close to Lily during their last few years at Hogwarts and he was beyond thrilled that she joined the little group of misfits they had. She had a bond with Remus that none of the boys could ever come close to replicating. He loved his friends and he was closer to them than anyone else in the world but his bond with Lily was special. He thought that their relationship would be one like he could have had with a sister.

She pulled another chair over and sat next to Remus, handing him the ice pack that had fallen when he stormed off. “I suppose you’re here to convince me to go through with this.”

Lily sighed and shrugged. “Not really. I think you should give it a shot but you’re right. You don’t know her and while it seems nice that she wants to help, you don’t know why she would. James was just excited to know there was someone else that wanted to help.”

She carefully rested a hand on his arm. “We all just want you to be happy and to have a good life that you deserve. Everyone is just excited at the idea that maybe this healer could be the one to help that.” Lily glanced at a new scar on his arm. “And if she’s as good at potion making as she is at healing, then I think she really could help.”

Remus looked at his arm. He had plenty of scars all over his body but the one on his arm that you had fixed earlier that morning was harder to see than the others. In fact some of them you did such a good job that there was hardly any evidence he had been hurt there in the first place. You had done a better job than anyone else ever had so maybe that did bode well for a cure.

“Give her one month, just one chance to figure this out and if it seems to go well or you think she isn’t weird, then it can’t hurt to keep trying. It really can’t hurt to give her a shot.”

“Fine but just one month.” Lily smiled and left Remus alone with his thoughts as she went back inside. He would agree to one month of help but Lily was wrong. This could end up hurting so many people. Remus had been hurt by strangers and friends but nothing hurt more than getting his hopes up only to have reality come crashing down on him and continuing to be a monster. This could hurt a lot.

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jasntodds · 9 months

Text

Petrichor Chapter 6 Teaser - Full Chapter coming 08/09

Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader (little bit of fwb) Teaser Words: 1,648 Chapter Warnings: Swearing, fluff, angst, ptsd, panic attack, blood, canon violence, bruises Summary:❝Pylades: I’ll take care of you. Orestes: It’s rotten work. Pylades: Not to me. Not if it’s you.❞ Gotham is home, not just for Jason but for you, too. And now that you’re both finally back home, together, you’re ready to see where this next chapter brings the two of you. He’s your best friend and you’re his. And you both might want a little something more with being back home, the place you both feel most comfortable. Surely, nothing could possibly go wrong now. A/N: I've been rearranging chapters 6-9 because of what I want to happen in chapter 7 so here we are with a teaser lol If the format is wonky, I'm sorry. I literally hate this post editor with a burning passion and it's giving me all of the problems atm You can add yourself to the tag list below, ask me to be tagged, or you can follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary and turn on notifications if you prefer that!! I love feedback, I swear it keeps me posting on a weekly basis 😭

It wasn’t that Jason was violent. That was never it. He could pick a fight just as good as the next person. But it was out of survival. It wasn’t because he liked the bloody and bruised knuckles. Or coming back with his body covered in shades of navy and maroon and the pain that went along with it. It was how he had to survive. Fight or die. Fight or let people take advantage of him.

He was small. He got lucky he grew taller as he got older but he was a small kid. It was either learn to fight and take what he could or get taken advantage of or die trying. It was learn to fight and hold his own or deal with whatever his dad would dish out or the new guy his mom brought home that didn’t really like kids. It was never that he wanted to be violent.

He was just angry with the world. Robin gives him the outlet. Robin lets him be violent in a way that’s productive. Robin lets him choose violence. Robin lets him pick fights that matter. Robin lets him let the anger and the violent side of him be a good thing instead of something that hinders him and something people find to be annoying and a nuisance. Robin has given him so fucking much including that outlet and he can’t lose it. And he just gets so fucking mad when he thinks about it. He's mad about it being taken away and mad at Bruce and a little mad at you for getting to use his outlet as your own, even when he knows that’s not fair.

It's the anger that always got the best of him. Not the violence.

“Where’s your head, Jay?” You ask, looking over your shoulder from the targets as Jason sits on the floor behind you.

Jason snaps away from his thoughts, looking over to you. “What?” He furrows his brows up at you.

“You're quiet and you’re never quiet unless something is bothering you.”

It's only been a few days but you know him better than anyone. It's been rough for him not having Robin. He wasn't Robin, technically, in San Francisco. He wasn't supposed to be anyway. He was supposed to be taking a break but that didn't seem to bother him as much as it does now. You're not entirely sure what the difference is this time but whatever it is, you've got this feeling that there's something more going on. Something's poking at his head.

Jason shakes his head. “Want to get back out there.” Jason scoffs.

You nod. “Yeah…” You suck in a breath, looking at your target full of knives before you move to sit in front of him. You match his position, stretching your legs out right beside his with your hands on the floor behind you to hold your weight. “You sure it doesn’t bug you I go out?” You ask.

Of course, it bothers him. That's his thing. But, it's yours, too. Maybe it wouldn't sting as much if you weren't going out with Bruce. But, there's nothing he can do about it and it would be wrong for him to even try. So, he bites his tongue about it.

“It’s fine, it’s your thing, too.”

You shake your head. “Yeah, but if it bothers you, I can wait until you get Robin back or I can just go out on my own.” You offer.

The first night Jason was benched, Bruce asked if you'd still join I'm for patrol. Jason assured you it was fine. So, you went and you talked later about it. He swore up and down it would be fine. You like to go out on patrol. You like to help people and who is he to try and take that away from you? You'd never do that to him.

“You think Bruce will be okay with that? You going out on your own?” Jason quips.

You grin before you let out a laugh. “Well, probably not anymore.”

Jason furrows his brows, his eyes scanning over your face. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

You bounce around how to tell him about your conversation with Bruce earlier without including the stuff about him. It's hard because on the one hand, you respect Bruce but on the other, he can be a little insufferable. And Jason looks up to him for reasons you don't really think you'll entirely understand. It's not your place to speak poorly of him to Jason. So, you tell him but you hope he doesn't ask what sparked the conversation in the first place.

“We, uh, we had a moral disagreement today.” You chew the inside of your cheek as you raise your brows.

“Ah,” Jason nods his head. “That why you don’t wanna go out tonight?” The moral disagreement doesn't surprise him. He knows how you feel about all of it but he is a little surprised you even brought up to Bruce.

“Amongst a few other things but yeah. I think he might think I’ll kill people now.” You roll your eyes.

Jason lets out a snort. “What the hell did you even say to make him think that?” Jason shakes his head. “Wait, let me guess.”

“I’m listening.” You gesture a hand for him to continue.

Jason clears his throat. “You should kill the Joker. He’s a piece of shit maniac clown who kills people for fun. He should be dead.” Jason grins at you. “Sound about right?”

“Shut the fuck up.” You groan through a laugh as you tilt your head back. “No.” You shake your head at him. "I said he was a homicidal, psychotic, sadist." You state. "And that he should die, yes." You mutter softly while Jason lets out a booming laugh.

He is certain you'll never let it go which he doesn't blame you for. He gets it. He doesn't like his dad but a part of him still wanted to go after Two-Face. Dick went after Zucco. Parents are killed and their kids want to take revenge. But, he also knows you and he doesn't think you'd ever actually try to kill anyone, but especially the Joker. You have more self-preservation than that.

“And he said something about we don’t cross that line or whatever?”

“Yep.” Your eyes widen as you nod your head. “Him and Dick think it’s ridiculous as if Dick didn’t feel that same way, ya know? But it’s the Joker. So, uh, I might have said his death is inevitable.” You scrunch your nose and maybe that was the wrong choice of words.

Jason eyes you carefully and there is something going on with you, too. It's one thing to have the moral disagreement with Bruce but to actually say anyone's death in inevitable seems a little off. Jason's so wrapped in his own anger, he's started to wonder if he's missing anything with you.

“Okay seriously, what the fuck is going on?” Jason nudges your leg with his.

“Nothing. I don’t think I really meant it or anything but I kind of wonder if Bruce thinks I’m serious and thinks I’m like a ticking time bomb or something.” You roll your eyes.

“Did he take the shit from you? The suit or anything?” Jason questions and he is getting increasingly more curious what even started that whole conversation and got you mad enough to say anything to Bruce.

“No. Why?”

“Then he doesn’t think you’re gonna out and kill people.” Jason chuckles. “He'd take it away and send you to Leslie if he thought you were serious.”

“Oh, well that’s a relief.” You chuckle softly. “Still don’t wanna go out tonight though.” You shake your head.

Jason pulls his legs to his chest, resting his forearms over his knees. "What started the whole conversation anyway? Did something happen?"

You pause and you hate lying to him. It's the one thing you really don't do with him. But, telling him why Bruce even talked to you, that just doesn't seem fair. You worry he might take Bruce's concern the wrong way. Maybe it'll send him spiraling even further. Maybe it's best if you just keep that to yourself.

"Nothing." You shake your head. "It's nothing, really." You assure him before you suck in a breath. “Seriously though, if you have a problem with me going out, you can tell me.”

The switch back the topic at hand does not go unnoticed and that's also uncharacteristic of you lately. You tell him everything that bothers you and what leads to it bothering you.

"Right, no. I said it's fine." Jason states. "If something's going on with you, you'd tell me, right?" Jason questions.

You nod your head. "Of course. Nothing's, uh, nothing's going on. You need to stop worrying." You offer him a cheeky grin and he knows you're lying. "Look, Jay, if it weren't for you, I wouldn't stand a chance out there. I know it's hard being benched and I don't wanna make it harder for you."

He knows you're lying but he can't figure out why you would lie to him about something like that. It doesn't seem important or serious enough to need a lie. Maybe a part of him is even hurt you won't tell him. But, he knows it's not fair to push because you don't push him when he's adamant about not tellin you. He hopes you'll tell him later when it's not so fresh.

Jason scoots closer to you, resting a hand on your thigh. “I’m fine, alright? Go out kick and some ass, with or without Bruce.” Jason grins at you. “Stop worrying so much.”

“I’ll always worry, I love you.” You smile wildly at him.

“Yeah, I love you, too.” Jason chuckles softly. “Im fine, I’ll be back out there in no time.”

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#jason todd x reader #jason todd fanfiction #jason todd fanfic #jason todd series #red hood x reader #red hood fanfic #red hood fanfiction #dc fanfic #dc fanfiction #titans fanfic #titans fanfiction

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daddyy333 · 11 months

Note

Oh on the requested of full angst I meant Metkayina instead Omatikaya sorry for the miscommunication I got it mixed up between the difference of Navi and didn't realize I was so brain loss and she is the daughter of Ronal and tonowari and again I'm so sorry

No Regrets | Neteyam x Lo’ak x reader (kinda…?)

if you’d like you can reblog my original work, but please don’t post it without credit. if you take inspiration from my ideas please tag me, I’d like to see how someone else would write it

word count: 3.9k

warnings: angst, lo’ak kinda gets his heart broken, ronal is *really* upset at reader, ?

summary: Lo’ak confesses his feelings to you, unaware that his older brother just did the same thing merely an hour ago and of course he finds out about your relationship by catching you two during an intimate moment

original request: full angst on lo'ak sully where the sully family came to the Metkayina clan to introduce themselves and in there lo'ak started to have a crush on sight of Reader and the reader is Metkayina (ronal and Tonowari daughter). When lo'ak started to confess his feelings towards the reader however the reader couldn't return the feeling since she like neteyem then lo'ak so she kindly rejected him in not trying to hurt him but made his whole heart shattered.

sorry this took so long💀

The moment Lo’ak laid eyes on you he was in love. He was infatuated by your beautiful features, your long hair and your clothing that accentuated your body in the best way. He was worried he wouldn’t have a shot with you since you were Olo’eyktan’s oldest daughter but he couldn’t stop thinking about you.

He’d spend as much time as he could near you. Always wanting to train with you specifically, always helping you when you needed, helping you teach the children, whatever you needed he was there to assist. You thought it was adorable and honestly appreciated it, but you never would’ve suspected his true feelings for you.

When the Sully family first arrived, you were worried about the whole situation to tell the truth. Worried about how the people would accept them, how they’d adapt, how they’d react to the new way of life. You decided you would accept them with open arms and would become they feel safest around if no one else would.

You quickly became infatuated with the oldest of the children, Neteyam. Blushing at his soft voice and shy glances, giggling at his sassy comments and jokes. He was very handsome as well, and his muscles didn’t help your ever-growing crush on the forest boy.

You knew he was going to make the perfect mate, and you loved how shy he got around you. When talking to your father or other members of the clan he was very stoic and stern, but when he spoke to you he was all soft spoken and gooey on the inside.

You took Neteyam to the Cove of the Ancestors, letting him connect and admiring his features as he did. He smiled, looking at you after he disconnected. You spoke a few words in sign language before he gestured for “I see you”.

Your eyes instantly widened and you blushed, trying not to laugh. He cupped your cheeks, caressing them as you smiled and did the same. You made your way to the surface and said “I see you,” He smiled, you were still trying to catch your breath but you just couldn’t wait any longer.

He blushed a little and said “I see you,” You couldn’t believe it you thought he just saw you as a little sister or any other woman of the clan. You blushed hard, resting your hands on his shoulders to help keep yourself afloat. You noticed him look down at your lips and you smiled a little, leaning in slightly.

You almost kissed, but quickly pulled away and shook your head. “No, no we shouldn’t. I want to know how our parents feel and the people” you said and he hummed, nodding. You chuckled and said “it’s not that I do not want you to court me I just…I-I’m meant to be the next Tsahík. As much as it will pain me that might mean I wouldn’t be able to mate with you. I want to though, desperately,”

You both chuckled and he nodded, admiring your features. You giggled and he groaned, hearing his father call for him on the earpiece. “I must go, unfortunately. I’ll see you around, yes?” He asked and you nodded. You smiled and blew him a kiss as called his ilu and swam away.

As you sat by the Cove of the Ancestors, giddy and making clothing for an upcoming ceremony like you had planned after bringing Neteyam to make tsaheylu with the spirit tree, you heard Lo’ak approach you from behind. You were quite surprised to see him, but still just as happy and excited.

“Lo’ak! What are you doing here?” You asked and smiled. He chuckled and said “I heard you were here, figured I’d come see you since I’m not doing anything for the rest of the day” “that’s sweet” you chuckled, grabbing another shell to thread onto the garment.

He sat in front of you and said “what are you making?” “I’m making myself new clothings for the celebration of my sibling’s birth. Mother says she feels they may arrive sooner than she thought” you said and he nodded. He leaned against a rock as he watched you and you both sat in a comfortable silence.

“You know there’s something I’ve been really wanting to tell you,” he said and you hummed, waiting for him to tell you. He took a deep breath and said “I-I uhm…I’ve sort of begun to have feelings for you throughout these last couple of months. I- I even look forward to learning the way of the Metkayina because of you and I used to hate that kind of stuff. I thought- well, I-I was wondering if maybe you felt similar?”

“Oh, Lo’ak…I- I appreciate you telling me. I’m very flattered b-but I don’t feel the same. It’s nothing about you, I promise, I just don’t really have those feelings for you. I’m sorry,” you said, you had stopped working and looked him directly in his eye.

He sighed, nodding. “Is there someone else?” “Y-Yes…” you said cautiously, how were you supposed to tell him you liked his brother instead? He nodded again and said “well I hope he knows how luck he is”

You both chuckled and you thanked him quietly. “Hey, things don’t have to become awkward between us now, just so you know. We can move on and pretend like it didn’t happen, or not. We can even still move on as it is and that could work too. You’re a good friend, Lo’ak, and a fast learner too,” you said and he nodded.

You felt terrible, you didn’t want to hurt him like that, you really didn’t. You weren’t going to lie to him though, you were sure that would only hurt him more. He stood up and you looked down, you didn’t want to see him so hurt and upset.

“I’ll see you at dinner, y/n” he said and you nodded. You watched him call his ilu and swim away with a frown on your face. You really hoped this wouldn’t affect your friendship too much.

You made your way back to the village, playing with children for a bit so their parents could prepare tonight’s dinner and even taking them on ilu rides in shallow water. You smiled as you saw Neteyam walk up to the spot you and the children were at, making sure all the children were doing something safe before you turned your attention to him for a moment.

“Hi, Neteyam” you said and giggled a little. He smirked and said “I see you’re keeping the children entertained” You smiled and nodded. He chuckled as a few of them ran up to him, a lot of the children had been infatuated with the forest people that had arrived, and Neteyam was okay with letting them get a closer look at the differences he had in comparison to them.

He picked one of them up and made them “fly like an ikran”, running around in the water and letting them glide across it. You smiled as you watched him. You wondered what he would be like as a father. You were willing to bet he’d make an amazing father.

After dinner, you brought him to a slightly more secluded area and said “I wanted to talk to you about something,” Of course he was worried, had you changed your mind? You took a deep breath and said “Lo’ak confessed his feelings for me today. I-I kindly turned him down, but I feel terrible. I think we should really make sure we are serious about each other before we say anything”

He was shocked, relieved, and slightly upset all at the same time. He had no idea Lo’ak felt that way, not at all. However, he was glad it was nothing serious or terrible. He didn’t know how to feel about the fact that he now knew Lo’ak had feelings for you. It was honestly a little annoying, he thought he could at least have you to himself if not anything else.

“Yea, yea you’re probably right,” he said quietly a few moments later. You smiled nervously and said “also, can you try and keep an eye on him? Make sure he’s okay? He seemed really hurt when I rejected him,”

“Of course, y/n” he said and you thanked him. He brushed your head behind your ear and kissed your head, smiling at you. You blushed and brought him back to the village instantly being pulled away by your mother to discuss a few things.

Neteyam wasn’t mad at Lo’ak, he knew he couldn’t control it. You are the most gorgeous girl in the clan, he was surprised to not see every man at your feet begging to be accepted as your mate. But he wants you to be his and his only.

As your relationship with Neteyam progressed, you tried to keep your distance but also stay close with Lo’ak. You didn’t want to upset him by making him hang out with you, but you also missed your friendship. Neteyam felt bad when you would open up to him about these kinds of things, but you begged him not to say anything because he didn’t want Lo’ak to suspect anything just yet.

2 months had gone by, and you were totally in love with Neteyam. You hadn’t expressed it just yet, but you were sure he was the one. You’d wait as long as it takes, and do whatever you have to to mate with him. He was your soulmate, there was no doubt about that.

Of course you had your doubts about whether he felt the same, but then he’d come begging to go to your secret spot so he could cuddle you and tell you how pretty you are and all your worries would melt away. You were so happy with Neteyam, it nearly brought you to tears when you thought about it.

So when you two decided to take a risk and have him visit your marui pod before either of your duties began, you should've known something bad was bound to happen. You had your back turned to the entrance as Neteyam held you close, arms resting low on your hips as you two giggled at how close you were.

Both your tails were swinging happily, your ears up and your freckles glowing slightly even in the early morning sunlight. You nuzzled your noses together, nearly kissing. Both of your breaths caught and Neteyam squeezed your hip.

“Ma syulang,” he said and you took a deep breath. You reached up and caressed his cheek as you pulled back, looking into his eyes. “Please, ‘teyam? It’s just one kiss” you said and he chuckled. It would never be one kiss. He wanted to mate with you before Eywa every second of every day, it couldn’t just be one kiss.

But he didn’t care. He leaned down and captured your lips in a small, gentle kiss. It only lasted a few seconds but it made you go crazy inside. He chuckled at how excited you obviously were, your tail swinging like crazy and a low purr vibrating in your chest.

He was no better, but you were just adorable like this. He leaned down to kiss you again, nearly beginning to make out when Lo’ak came in, scoffing at the sight. You gasped and turned around quickly, still in Neteyam’s arms.

“Lo’ak!” You said and he shook his head as he said “your mother needs you” He left and you groaned. You turned around and Neteyam sighed softly. He let go of you and pushed you lightly, encouraging you to go after him.

You smiled and quickly made your way out of the tent. You struggled to catch up to him but once you did you could hear how heavy his breathing was and he was only walking so he must’ve been angry. “Lo’ak, please j-” you said and he shoved you off of him.

“Don’t! I- I can’t believe you, y/n. How long?” He asked, he wasn’t yelling or screaming but that only scared you more. You whimpered a little and said “Two months…” Lo’ak shook his head and tears filled your eyes.

“I- I-I didn’t mean for this to happen, okay? I didn’t go out of my way to not have feelings for you, I just don’t! I’m sorry that your brother is the man I love but there’s nothing I can do about it-” you said and he cut you off, asking you a question that made your heart drop.

“You love Neteyam?” He said and you whimpered, letting out a shaky sigh. You felt tears in your eyes as you said “I-…I do, Lo’ak. I love- oh god, I love Neteyam” He shook his head and walked away, returning to the village.

You whimpered and your back fell against the tree you were in front of as you cried softly, tears rolling down your cheeks as you whimpered and gasped. You didn’t want this to happen, you didn’t want Lo’ak to find out like this. You certainly weren’t ready to admit you loved Neteyam, you didn’t understand why you said it, you’ve barely been able to admit it in your head.

You’re scared to believe that you’ve found the one at such a young age. You’ve always worried that you’ll mate with the wrong man and ruin your entire future. Admitting you loved Neteyam was terrifying for you.

“Y/n…” Neteyam said and you sniffled softly, looking around. He was to your left, jogging up to you. He cupped your cheeks as he caught up to you and said “ma syulang, are you okay?” “T-This wasn’t supposed to ha-happen,” you whimpered.

He caressed your cheek with a sad smile and said “it’s- it’s gonna be okay, sweetheart. Everything will turn out just fine, do not worry” You shook your head, more tears welling up in your eyes. He grabbed your legs and wrapped them around his waist, moving his hands to your back to pull you against him.

You wrapped your arms around his neck, crying into his chest. “I didn’t want this to h-happen” you said and he kissed your head. He rubbed your back as he said “I know, my love. I know you’re hurt and you’re scared but we can get through this. You’re not gonna feel like this forever, you know”

“I just wished that we could’ve planned it and- a-and done it in a way that wouldn’t hurt him so much” you said and Neteyam sighed softly. You sniffled and stood up, shaking your head. You wiped your tears and said “he said my mother needed me, I should go”

You started to walk away but he stood up and grabbed your waist, stopping you. You turned around and he cupped your cheeks, wiping your tears. “She can wait. You’re not okay right now” he said and you took a deep breath.

“It is fine. I promise,” you said and walked away for good this time, heading to the village. Your mother seemed angry and Neytiri was there too, wearing a similar expression. You sighed shakily and walked closer.

Once your mother saw you she started walking towards you, grabbing your arm harshly. “Y/n! How could you?” She asked, you gasped. You shook your head and she said “The forest boy?! Really?”

Neytiri scoffed and you whimpered. She growled and said “Lo’ak says you are mated to this boy. I cannot believe this!” You were so scared, you’d never seen your mother this angry. You whimpered, tears rolling down your cheeks.

“No, mother. I am not mated to Neteyam, but…but he is courting me” you said and she hissed, letting go of you. You let a sob slip through your lips, shaking your head. “You said he was the man you loved” Lo’ak said, arms crossed.

You groaned, rushing over and shoving him. “W-What is wrong with you? I never did anything to you! I rejected you nicely and have been trying to be there for you since. I have been nothing but nice and kind to you, why would you do this?!”

“Y/n…” Neteyam said and said you gasped. You turned around and he walked closer. Both mothers scoffed and Neteyam took a deep breath before he said “Is this true?”

“Is it?!” Your mother yelled and you flinched, a shaky breath pushing past your lips. “It is,” you said, sniffling. You turned to her and said “it is true. I love Neteyam and nothing you say or do will change that and I will mate with him before Eywa because that is her will and I am sure of it. You are Tsahík, mother. You should know”

Everything got quiet, and the anger and fear running through you made your heartbeat throb in your head. She sighed and said “I do not want you with that forest boy. What is wrong with the many fine men who are real Metkayina and real Na’vi?”

“You are unbelievable, sa’nu” you said and grabbed Neteyam’s hand, calling your ilu. You both hopped on and you swam away, sobs racking your body. He wrapped his arms around your waist and said “I’m so sorry,”

“It’s not your fault. It’s not your fault, it’s not…it’s not your fault” you said and he kissed your head. You brought him to the cove of the ancestors and he then realized what you were trying to do.

“No, y/n. No.” He said and you sighed shakily. You closed your eyes and said “Yes, Neteyam. I am sick of my life being controlled and determined by her and what she wants. I want you. That’s what matters” “I’m not doing this with you right now. You’re upset, you’re not thinking clearly” he said and you scoffed.

You got onto a rock and paced as you said “I wanted to before all of this and I only want to even more now that all of this is happening. Why can’t you accept that?” “Beca- cause it’s not right, y/n! I don’t want to mate with you to get back at your mother for Eywa’s sake. I want to mate with you when we are so in love with each other that we can’t think about anything else besides connecting our souls for life” he said and got onto the rock with you.

You shook your head and fell to the ground, burying your head into your hands as you sobbed softly. Neteyam sniffled softly and bent down next to you, rubbing your back softly. You whimpered, your breathing shaky and uneven and your mind completely all over the place.

You sat up and sighed, wiping your tears. You looked up at him and said “don’t leave me….please,” “baby…I wouldn’t dream of it” he said and you chuckled. You buried your head into his chest and he smiled a little, holding you in his arms.

Eclipse hit and you two decided you should head back to the village before you got into any more trouble than you were already in. You walked together, hand in hand and your mother called you over.

You brought him with you despite his attempt to break away from you. You followed your mother to her marui pod and Neytiri, Jake, and Lo’ak were there as well and so was your father. Neytiri pulled Neteyam towards her by his ear, making him hiss.

“What in Eywa’s name are you thinking?” She whispered and he sighed heavily. You stood before your mother and father, no longer caring for their opinions.

“Well” Tonowari said, shaking his head. You looked at Neteyam and said “he is my mate. You take him away, I will neger mate with anyone else. I would give up being Tsahík for him. He is what I want most”

Neteyam nearly cried again at your words, he couldn’t believe you felt so strongly about him. He turned to you and said “you can’t do that for me. I won’t let you” “you can't stop me, Nete. I will give up everything as long as I get to keep you” you said and he shook his head.

“You can’t be serious. You two have no idea how major this is. How could a forest boy be Olo’eyktan for the Metkayina-” Ronal said before you snapped and interrupted her. “Stop calling him a forest boy! He is one of us now! He will be your son in law and you will respect him” you said and she scoffed.

“Think of how this will affect the clan. Think of your children, what will they even look like, hmm?” Jake said and you took a deep breath. You shook your head and said “I don’t care what you guys think! Please, stop trying to break us apart because it isn’t going to work!”

Your father shook his head and said “I am disappointed in you, maite” Neteyam noticed the falter in your expression, they way your breath hitched. He knew that hurt. Your father had been nothing but proud of you your entire life and Neteyam could tell even having only been here for a little less than a year.

You left your parents' pod and ran to yours, letting out a shaky breath. You closed your eyes and shook your head. You meant everything you said, you didn’t regret any of it. But hearing those words from your father felt like a shot to the heart.

Neteyam ran after you, gently rocking the beads outside of your pod to let you know he was there. You looked over at him and sighed. You walked up to him, wrapping your arms around his neck as you kissed him softly and passionately.

“Oel ngati kameie” you whispered. Neteyam gasped and you pressed your forehead to his, nuzzling your nose against his. You sighed shakily and he said “O- Oel ngati kameie,”

You smiled, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath. “I’m risking a lot…by choosing you. I’ll never regret but I need to know if you even feel the same about me” you said and he scoffed. He shook his head and said “of course I do, y/n. I see you,”

You let a tear slip down your cheek as you said “good. I’d have to kill you if you didn’t,” You both giggled and he held you tighter, kissing you softly. He chuckled again and said “yea, I’d probably let you too”

You rolled your eyes, he always made jokes like this. How he’d let you do whatever you wanted to him. How he’d do whatever you wanted him to. How he’d spend the rest of his life making you happy.

“You’re so annoying” you said and rested your head on his chest as you giggled to yourself. You felt the vibrations from his laugh through his chest before he kissed your head, wanting to stay in this moment forever.

Both of your parents were still very upset at the two of you for what felt like forever. When you mated 3 months later your mother refused to talk to you for weeks. It hurt, but at least your father now respected Neteyam and your relationship.

You still didn’t regret anything, especially as you and Neteyam watched Lo’ak and Tsireya dance with each other at tonight’s hunting ceremony. You giggled as you turned in your mates arms, beginning to caress his cheek. “My mother is going to explode” you said and both of you giggled, joking about what she’d say and how she’d react.

“Oel ngati kameie,” he said, smiling down at you. You blushed, tail swinging as you said “oel ngati kameie” He smiled at how shy you got, you were still so shy when expressing your feelings and it was adorable to him. You nuzzled into his chest and giggled, warmth flooding your chest at how loved Neteyam made you feel.

Taglist: @laylasbunbunny @neteyam4life @bakugouswaif @abcm18339

As of now l'm writing for

Eddie Munson

Lo’ak

Neteyam

So just comment the taglist you want to be added to and l'll add you :)

#james cameron avatar #avatar imagine #avatar #avatar 2009 #avatar 2022 #avatar 2 movie #avatar 2 #avatar neteyam #neteyam sully #neteyam x reader #neteyam fluff #neteyam x you #neteyam te suli tsyeyk'itan #neteyam x metkayina!reader #atwow lo’ak #lo’ak angst #lo’ak avatar #lo’ak x metkayina!reader

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utahlive · 1 year

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im sorry utah nation. I played videos game instead of working on an episode,, orz

on an unrelated note, I wanted to ask: does anyone have any tumblr themes or ways to make posts chronological? We have roughly 150 episodes of UtahLIVE, and although most of them can be read out of order, there is a timeline (plus it would be more convenient for new readers. Ive gotten a lot of asks about topics or scenarios that have already been answered). If there are any tutorials/themes/tips let me know via DMs or ask box!

additionally:

LETS GOOOOO!!! This is insane! 4000 people... thats roughly twice the size of the student body at my school. I dont know how many of you guys are porn bots, but im still going to take this W. I feel like I should do something special? People usually do community events for milestones I think so if you have ideas let me know?? Otherwise I’ll have something fun to post in the next week.

+ some quick q&a below

avoiding potential lawsuits 🙏

I know this one is meant for Wilbur, but alas thats just how I draw eyes. Sorry my art style gave your fave character cataracts. yeah its permanent. no sorry we cant fix it. um. insurance doesnt cover the surgery so hes like that forever. yeah. sorry

(i do like to mess with how I draw eyes, but the white color is a stylistic choice)

its a psycho-competitive relationship that can be construed to be romantic (but it's not explicit). obviously

anon im holding your hand so tenderly and lovingly. it means a lot that people like my art! more than I can say, which is why ive been trying to figure out how to answer this ask for the past like... two+ weeks since you sent it in! Im probably gonna hold off on sharing my other accounts for a few reasons (there might be some people who already know my other blogs which is fine idc welcome to my twisted mind etc im just not going to advertise them here). My main blog is basically a spam blog where I dont tag anything. I dont really post original art and my fandom art is few and far between. 90% of my work just goes in discord DMs or servers 💀 I think the main reason though-and this may or may not make sense to some of you-is that I don’t want your opinion of me to change how you view the story. This is a super specific example, but for all my fic readers out there: have you ever joined an authors server, and then after meeting them you feel a bit odd about the fic since the creator isnt exactly the person you thought them to be (not necessarily in a good or bad way)? That’s exactly what I don’t want happening with this blog. Basically: Nooo what if you find out about me as a person and realize im cringeeee aaaaa [image of the werewolf transformation (you know the one)] That being said, we’ll see how things go, I guess! At the very least, I’ll probably put my socials out when I’m done here (we got a ways to go before that happens though, so dont even start to worry about that) that was a lot of text for one answer. yeesh 😬 sorry about that

#utahlive #4th wall break #im a creep. im a weirdo #it is crazy as hell to see blogs and artists I really admire following this account #(image of the guy at the party) they dont know we're mutuals #also for the tntduo romantic ask; the implied answer there is that its up to you #I do have my own interpretation and canon but I know not everyone agrees so Im not gonna make it obvious one way or another #sorry for so many non-answer posts the past few days

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ntls-24722 · 4 months

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Glamrock Freddy still hangs out with DJMM despite his awful transformation.

Despite his appearance, DJMM can't bring himself to completely hate this new form - it makes him an amazing singer. It's dumb, but this ability hits for a music man 🤷‍♂️

AWFUL franz kafka djmm lore below the cut ↓

ok so.

The Security Breach cast is turned human. Not sure how, not sure why, They were not born humans but were robots, now turned human. Whatever force that made the rest of the security breach cast (mostly) (by mostly i mean they still have ears and tails and such) human worked on DJMM for awhile, but he is noticably super tiny and doesn't look like himself at all. Even stranger is that he is consumed by this ravenous hunger that, while he satiates this appetite he growsnew arms and gets huge - He has no idea what's going on. The rest of the cast have some animalistic urges but they're generally related to the animal that they are (and in Chica's case, Chica is Chica) but he's having hungry hungry caterpillar bullshit largely unrelated to spiders and as they distance themselves to the plex and get used to human life, DJMM's quickly growing form is now difficult for the rest of them to accommodate. Eventually DJMM grows extremely tired, so he goes to his room for a nap but instead goes into turpor and metamorphizes in his room for 2 months

When he finally wakes up, well???

It's kind of implied that whatever force made them human, due to DJMM's ambiguously "half human, half not human" status, drastically underestimated how human to make DJMM and that's why he eventually ends up like that.

He does not lose sentience, but when he emerges as this horrible naked man that looks an awful lot like how he used to look (but worse), people (particularly, some of the Security Breach cast) begin to treat him as if he had lost his sentience. And... he starts to act like that, too. He stops talking and when he flees, he doesn't bother trying to prove to others that he is, in fact, not some animal.

...

yyyyeaaahhhh . I know. i don't know why i wrote this.

this all was seeded by a hypothetical post i thought i should make one day with anime boy djmm as the first picture and then I'd psyche out anyone who went into the post with bible accurate DJMM/fat old man djmm?

This got combined with this Skinny DJMM ? Where instead of a post psyching people out it'd be a body horror thing of him cracking out of the smaller human djmm design like a cicada? Which, i had mentioned this in tags, but i hadnt mentioned that that concept came to me because of this absolute fucking banger piece of Scarab (fionna and cake) fanart (thank you @lyman-garfiel for showing it to me oh my god)

then i just said that that implied twink djmm was skinny DJMM's larval form? And then with Skinny DJMM's character already being conceptualized (mostly in my head) this all amalgamated into.... five nights at gregor samsa's

i suppose this is an explanation of how i came to this. I don't know if this is an explanation of why i let it come to this

#ntls-24722 #djmm #dj music man #fnaf djmm #fnaf dj music man #glamrock freddy #human glamrock freddy #(almost) daily music man #Skinny DJMM

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20dollarlolita · 1 year

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For people who are new, I have an entire tag on my blog called Petticoat Theory, which is about how construction of a petticoat impacts its final shape.

Okay, Petticoat Theory and _boringbb_'s petticoat she posted on tiktok, and how that relates to lolita fashion:

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRb5GQ9T/

When I do a puffy skirt, I want it to be cartoonishly over-the-top, big, comically puffy, and I have yet to find a petticoat on the market that gives me the look that I'm going for. So, here's how I make my petticoat. If you make one, you can just reuse it for a bunch of dresses, so, one-and-done kind of situation here. Normal petticoats, they start very close to your waist, and then they have more that go away from your body as you go down towards your feet. I go for the inverse. I come from a ballet background, so I really like the tutu look, which is just kind of what I recreated with this petticoat. I have two layers of crinoline, and there's three layers of those two layers of crinoline, if that makes sense. So it's folded-over crinoline one, two, three, and the puffiest layer is close to my waist, and it goes in towards my body as it goes towards my feet. Having this volume right by your waist will give you the nice puffy look you're going for.

I've had several people ask me questions about this petticoat, so here's my takes:

Full disclaimer: I can't argue with success. Julia made a petticoat that she loves the shape of, so I'm not about to say it doesn't work. The fact that I don't personally construct my petticoats like that should not impact that she gets the shape she wants from hers.

So Julia's petticoat is three doubled layers of poof, all attached to a slip. The reason it looks relatively unconventional, when viewed from a lolita fashion viewpoint, is that the layers get shorter the higher up they go.

This isn't how a lolita petticoat is constructed, even when we're trying to reach the same shape. And we are, in fact, trying to reach the same shape.

I think the reason this petticoat is making its rounds in lolita fashion circles is that it's so different-looking from what we're used to. We're very familiar with how we make monster cupcake poof, so we're all a little alarmed when some other method shows up.

So, let's talk about what this does that is similar to what we do, and what it does that is different:

Here's one of a few different ways that lolita fashion will make that shape. I'm grabbing this style because it's very similar to Julia's up there: it's several layers of poof sewn onto a slip. I did a tutorial for this method here, and I have a petticoat made with this method that I use for lower-poof applications:

This is my less-poofy petticoat entirely because I constructed it to be that way; I have a petticoat made by Wunderwelt that is sometimes just too much poof for some of my skirts, requiring me to construct a lower-poof petti. As you can see, I still get the bell/cupcake shape where there's volume at the waist. It's not as much volume as Julia, but that's because it's designed to fit the skirts I made it for.

There is nothing that stops a petticoat of this construction from being enormously poofy. If I had used something stiffer like petticoat net or crinoline, instead of the crystal organza that I used, it would be a much larger petticoat.

So, how is our petticoat constructed that is different from Julia's? The main thing is that all of our layers end a couple inches shorter than the hem of the skirt we will be wearing over them. Every layer of the petticoat hits at the same hem length. This means that the top layer is cut longer than the following layers, and the closer to the hem of the slip they are attached, the narrower the layer is. This does, in fact, fit Julia's description of "they start very close to your waist, and then they have more that go away from your body as you go down towards your feet." However, the fact that the top layer of the petticoat is gathered directly into the waist of the slip means that we do, actually, have quite a bit of poof in the waistband.

In fact, the only difference between this style of petticoat and the petticoat that Julia made is where the individual tiers of ruffles end.

Which asks the question: if we're attempting to reach the same shape, why do our petticoats look like they do, and Julia's petticoat looks like it does.

Why is it that we want all of the layers of our petticoat to end at the same place, and why is that place 3-6" above the hem of our skirt?

First of all, we have our petticoats end several inches above the hems of our skirts because we don't want our petticoats to show in lolita fashion. You don't go to a tea party with your underwear hanging out of your skirt, now, do you? But, if we don't want them seen, why do we even bring the poof all the way to the bottom of the skirt?

The answer is pretty simple: hem support. I would like everyone who is able to please go throw a bed sheet over your nearest floor lamp with a lamp shade.

Okay, so I only had a towel, but we do what me must with what we have. And what we have is a towel that is supported part way down its length, but with no support as we get to the hem.

When we move, we do not want our skirt hems to be out flopping in the air with no support. We don't want the skirt to drop off.

In addition, we generally want our bell-shaped skirts to be more y=-x^2 instead of a square wave. We want poof at the waist, because that is the thing that makes a cupcake petticoat the cupcake shape, but we also want the poof to continue all the way until the end of the skirt. This is the same reason that a hoop skirt supporting a ball gown has a hoop very near the hem of the dress. The dress and the shape of the dress needs support.

Now, Julia has also made a couple of follow-up videos on this:

and

Unfortunately, instagram does not allow me to pause the reel the way tiktok does, so I can't easily transcribe the audio in these. However, what they do show is that she often wears additional layers over her petticoat in order to smooth out the shape. These additional layers, in this case, are what she calls "standard petticoats". They are longer than her petticoat, and they have additional volume at the hem.

You can see in this image, where she is intentionally wearing a sheer garment so that we can see how the petticoat stack works, that she's brought support down to the hem of the garment, and that her outermost layer is longer than her other layers.

Basically, Julia does understand how to construct a petticoat. Having no exposure to lolita fashion, she was not aware that petticoats designed with a lot of volume at the waist exist, so she decided to create that shape herself. She was able to understand how to make the shape that she wanted, and she didn't construct it in the conventional method because she knew she was using it in conjunction with other garments to provide hem support and a smooth the overall look.

Julia understands petticoat theory just fine and y'all need to stop sending me this video expecting to tear her apart.

Julia, you get a solid B+ in today's Petticoat Theory class. Points are deducted for two reasons: the phrase "50's inspired" and the phrase "the tutu look." I'm not an expert on 50's fashion, but I have written an entire blog about why you can't use 50's petticoats to make a lolita shape, so I'm guessing the fact that she's made a solidly not bad lolita shape means it's not particularly 50's inspired.

The other thing is that tutus are absolutely made with the longest layer on top, so that the top looks smooth. The tutu gains its perfect flat shape from having each layer stacked onto a slightly shorter layer. Basically, if you have a very short piece of netting gathered onto a tutu panty, it will stick out on its own. So, if you just keep stacking a layer that's only a little longer than the last layer onto the previous layer, they'll support each other, and you can get your 12-15" top layer to stick out perfectly flat. I'm only mentioning this because a lot of people don't know this, or that a ballet tutu will stick out flat without any kind of hoop in it. I just think that's cool.

As for "her petticoat only works if there's another petticoat on top of it", that's also how hoop skirts, panniers, bustles, bum rolls, hip pads, and so many other undergarments work! It's completely legitimate and it seems to work fine!

BTW, Julia, I think you'd do AMAZING in lolita fashion, and if you ever want to try it, please reach out to me. I think you'd really like it.

Anyhow, it's not conventional, it's not 50's, and it's not a tutu, but Julia saw a problem in the petticoats that she had, and she built her own little petticoat-booster to solve that problem. Perfect understanding of petticoat theory. Let's move on.

#petticoat theory #20dollarlolita #lolita fashion

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honeydjarin · 2 years

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TO THE BONE PART II

DIN DJARIN X READER

Crowds part for the Mandalorian, eyes averted, a constant path standing clear before him even in the busiest places. By the time you realize exactly why his kind is so feared, it’s too late for you. Your silence just might be your downfall.

warnings: fem!reader, soulmates, non-consensual drug use, Dr. Pershing conducts tests on unwilling subjects, canon typical violence

word count: 6,800

a/n: Thank you so much for all of the kind feedback on the first part of this series! I’m so excited to continue this journey together.

I have several parts written, and hope to post every two weeks. That may change towards the end depending on how long it takes to get the end written.

EDIT: reposting because the previous version wasn’t showing up in the tags

SERIES MASTERLIST || MASTERLIST || AO3

It’s been a while since you were last in hyperspace. You’ve forgotten the strength of the initial jump, the atmospheric turbulence transitioning into something much smoother. You’ve forgotten the lurching in your stomach as your body tries to adjust to going far faster than should be possible for a human.

If you don’t think about why you’re traveling, or who is keeping you company during the journey, you just might find this jump through hyperspace peaceful. There are only the stars streaking by around you, clear of your path as you hurtle along the various hyperlanes throughout the galaxy.

Traveling with the Mandalorian is even quieter than most of your journeys through the galaxy have been. The starliners were always busy, loud, and often ran late, as is to be expected from any sort of public transportation hub. But when you left home to travel the galaxy, the commercial ships had been the only way for you to see new star systems, or at least the only way that wouldn’t put you at risk of having a bounty on your head. The passenger liners always served your purpose despite the constant noise of those also seeking to planet hop.

You could get a flight at a reasonable cost, and travel between most of the well settled planets regardless of where they were in the galaxy. Even the Outer Rim has its fair share of ports, constantly shutting people for work or trade between planets, or even just for the sake of sightseeing. You could pretend you were running towards a new future for yourself, one that didn’t include the Force, unchanging destinies, or bounty hunters. You could pretend that it wasn’t really your home that you were running from, or that you weren’t really just trying to escape from yourself.

Even later, when the future you had fought so hard against began to pass, your fate sealed because of the skills your mother had taught you instead of letting your gifts fade to nothing, when you became a target, there was constant commotion in the starships. Passenger liners were no longer a safe way for you to travel, and the smaller, privately owned ships rang out with a different type of noise. Too much sabacc, too much alcohol, too much money lost. These things always led to raised voices and stray blaster fire.

You felt safer there than you do now. Each moment the words on your forearm weren’t spoken was a promise that you would survive at least one more day.

The Mandalorian’s starship isn’t like those other transports. It’s quiet, near silent, more so than the scarcely populated Arvala-7. This is the quietest journey across the galaxy you’ve ever been on. There is no conversation, no threats, no blaster fire or raucous laughter. Just a single warning.

“Don’t touch this,” the Mandalorian said as he locked up his extensive arsenal of weapons upon your entry onto the ship. You doubt you could find a way to crack open the door even if you wanted to. Not without the Force. Then he herded you towards a short ladder, one that reaches up to a second level above, before undoing the restraints just long enough to reattach them to a rung just below the height of your chest. It was high enough to be uncomfortable but low enough that you wouldn’t risk losing feeling in your arms. The action was just more insurance that you won't touch his stuff, it seemed. He left you there alone in the hull and took the still unconscious child up the ladder with him. At least he didn’t shut the door to the cockpit behind him.

Now, you’re left to wonder if you’ll spend the whole journey like this.

You almost think he forgot about you. or he finally decided you’re not a flight risk. He has you trapped on his ship with nowhere to possibly run. He only needs to worry about what you might do to the starship itself.

He doesn’t come back down from the cockpit, even when he clearly has the ship on autopilot. You stretch back as far as you can and watch from below as he turns towards the pram floating beside him, rocking it gently a few times. Grogu must still be asleep. It is a sweet gesture, or it would be, if the hunter wasn’t still planning on turning you both in to whoever the latest client is. It is only then, after he finishes checking on the kid, that he climbs back down the ladder from the cockpit to check on you again.

He removes your binders completely and your arms fall instantly to your sides, not knowing what else to do with them. The Mandalorian makes no indication of wanting to put the restraints back on you. He doesn’t speak, and doesn't show you any further signs of acknowledgement. He just steps back and climbs up the ladder to the cockpit once more.

It’s too quiet in the Mandalorian’s ship, the silence stretching on from the moment he released you from the restraints. With no chatter, no attempt by the armored man to make you comfortable, no sign of where it is he’s taking you, the silence settles like a heavy weight that pulls you into the floor more firmly than the ship’s artificial gravity. It’s suffocating.

The Mandalorian intends to hand you off to the client, take his reward, and then forget about you and the child. You know you’re just a job to him, even if he is your soulmate. So you intend to leave as much of an impression as you can. He only told you not to touch where he stores his weapons. He didn’t say anything about the rest of the starship, so you can touch everything else… right?

You cast a lingering glance towards the carbonite freezer. There are no bodies that you know of on the ship right now, but you’re certain the bounty hunter is more than willing to use it on a quarry. Would he freeze you if he caught you touching his things?

If he needs you alive, then you doubt it’s a risk he is willing to take. Not when 60% of those put in carbonite don’t survive the process, and the ones that do often face other side effects such as hibernation sickness and temporary blindness. Still, you'll just have to be careful in your meddling.

As if he can sense your intentions to snoop, the Mandalorian returns for you.

“Come into the cockpit,” he states, leaving no room for argument.

He helps you to struggle up the ladder, your arms half numb from being restricted, just to make sure you don’t fall and crack your head open, before he makes you sit in one of the remaining unoccupied seats of the cockpit. Your hands remain free, the Mandalorian considering you to not be a threat—it’s almost pitiful. His gaze holds steady on the galaxy before him, trusting that you couldn’t hurt him even if you tried. He still doesn’t speak to you, and you're not really sure if he is comfortable in the silence or not. You are once again reminded that he is most likely used to being completely alone while traveling through the galaxy.

It’s a thought that almost makes you sad.

—☾—

He brings you to another desert planet, one you’ve never been to before and really don’t want to be on now.

It’s more populated than Arvala-7, the entire population of the previous planet likely not even the equivalent of half the faces you see milling about before you here, especially now that the Niktos no longer have control of the bunker.

There were no towns on Arvala-7, just some farms, some Jawas, and the hideout, but it didn’t feel gloomy there, even when you were trapped in the bunker walls. The sun would always filter through the slatted windows—they were too small to climb through but just enough to give you a glimpse outside the walls and remind you of the galaxy beyond the well guarded building. The sunlight would glint on the dust particles and show you how they danced through the air, almost as if they were alive.

Here, everything is dark. The earth is black, burned from the same magma that created it, the sky turned grey with the ever smoldering cinders of the planet. It looks as though a raging storm is coming, but the lack of moisture in the air indicates otherwise.

You can taste the planet burning on your tongue. Do the people around you taste it too? Or has everyone here grown used to the acrid ash filling their lungs? The Mandalorian pulling you once more by the restraints down the ramp of his ship doesn’t seem to notice. The filter in his helmet keeps all impurities in the air out of his body, just another form of armor against any adversary he might face.

The docking area, not so much a bay as an expanse of flat land outside of the town limits, has several worn down starships settled in it, the old yellow paint detailing on the Mandalorian’s ship being one of the only things that makes it stand out from the other docked ships. The hunter leads you through the bustling shipyard and pulls you directly to the main street in the town.

The town’s entrance is framed by a giant stone archway made from the same grey material as everything else around you. The top is almost more square than round, and crumbling from age in different parts. It is still magnificent despite its weathering. The structure towers above everything around it, no building in the town coming close to the height of the arch.

You stumble slightly as you gawk, too busy paying attention to what lies above you than what rests on the ground before you. You fail to see the uneven dip of the unpaved path, and the toe of your boot catches on the solid earth. The Mandalorian’s grip on you is the only thing that prevents you from tumbling to your knees.

“Keep up,” he demands, his tone giving away his clear irritation despite the lack of change in his body language. But he still pauses, gives you just a moment to get your feet back under you, before he continues into the town once more. It’s another moment resembling kindness, even if it’s over in a flash. He returns to pulling you forward through the threshold, Grogu floating by your side.

While the street around you is wide, it feels as though the edges are pressing into you, the walls growing closer as the number of sentient lifeforms increases. All around you are vendors stationed at various market stalls—the smell and smoke of cooking food wafts your way from many of the stands, the scents barely stronger than the natural smell of the planet. Groups and individuals of all species are shouting and laughing, some stopping at the stalls while others push through the crowd, heading to some other destination. The commotion in this place is the complete antithesis of the last few days spent on the Mandalorian’s starship.

The child watches from his spot close by your side, curious about the new location. He doesn’t know that soon your safety will not be guaranteed. He coos slightly each time you’re hit with a new smell, reaching a clawed hand out towards whatever food catches his interest. Even though he ate a ration bar not long ago, the kid is hungry once more.

In other circumstances you would like to stop and look at the different stands. You would find some real food for the kid to eat, making sure he ate slowly so as not to upset his stomach, as he is prone to do. But the rations have all of the nutrients he needs, and you don’t have that kind of freedom.

Despite the close press of the crowd, no one jostles into you, even when many keep their eyes away from your form, gazes directed instead at the Mandalorian in front of you. It’s obvious that the majority of those wandering the streets here are not the most law-abiding of people, if the number of blasters and vibroblades you see looped around belts and strapped to thighs is any indication of their character.

The Republic has little control over the planets in the Outer Rim, creating the perfect breeding ground for those living outside the law, the distance from the rest of the galaxy offering a sense of freedom that often goes too far beyond the line of what’s considered moral by most. But even here the crowd parts for the Mandalorian to pass through. You and The Child receive little attention compared to the armored man directly in front of you.

The Mandalorian shows no sign that the staring bothers him. He hardly changes his trajectory as he pulls you through the market, the dark visor of his helmet never wavering from the path in front of him.

“This way,” he grunts, tugging you in a new direction without any further warning. Your new course takes you down an alley.

There are far fewer people here than there were on the main street. Somehow all the clamor and commotion fades away almost immediately, leaving nothing but the rising fear behind. It bubbles in your gut and turns your stomach sour. There is nothing to distract yourself with now. Nothing but the dull reflection of the churning firmament off the Mandalorian’s helmet, and the dented cuirass—which no longer looks bloodied, the paint instead like rust, in the grey haze of this planet—that has lost almost all of its integrity since he first began dragging you with him from the bunker.

You wish you could beg, or cry, or even just speak to him. You should do something to stop this, anything to keep him from turning you and the child in for the bounty. If you could just talk to him things could be so different. But you’ve spent your whole life building up resentment for the man, and something that looks like compassion doesn’t mean it is kindness.

He could still be cruel, and speaking to him may lead to a far worse outcome than you’re already facing. You’ve spent your whole life determining his character without even meeting him and now you can’t bring yourself to reveal the truth. You wish you weren’t so stubborn.

You wish stubbornness didn’t feel so much like fear.

The hunter drags you down several other streets and alleys, twisting and turning along the town’s winding passage ways, up and down short flights of stairs until you are too lost to even think of making your way back to the main street—not that doing so would provide any real safety, not when a Mandalorian is after you.

Finally, he brings you to a halt in front of a nondescript door in the back of an alley. He lifts his free hand up to knock on the door, the sound of his fist against metal reverberating off the walls inside in a dead and hollow clang.

For a moment nothing happens, and you almost think the Mandalorian managed to get lost in the streets himself. Then, a camera the shape of an eye stalk extends from a hatch beside the door, speaking robotically in a language you don’t recognize but must mean something to the Mandalorian. He holds something up in front of the camera, receiving a response in that same unknown language, before the camera disappears in the hatch once more.

The door hisses open slowly, a cool gust of air breathing against your face, raising goosebumps on your flesh. What lies behind the steel barricade is enough to make your blood run cold.

The helmets that stare back at you aren’t supposed to exist anymore—at least, not attached to a body. They shouldn’t adorn walking, talking, living beings. But the ghostly figures clad in cheap white armor are clearly alive, and when you turn to look at the man who brought you here, the T of his visor that had seemed so neutral to you before begins to look more terrifying by the second. Suddenly you understand why crowds part around him, why people grow silent and avert their eyes in his presence, or keep their stare trained on him, ensuring that they are not the ones he is after.

The ghosts usher the three of you into the hall behind the door, and as it slides shut once more you are confronted with the fact that you wasted any chance you had to run. You should have tried harder, fought tooth and nail to protect the child and yourself. Your knowledge of your connection to the Mandalorian allowed you to grow complacent during the journey here, but he doesn’t have the same knowledge as you. He has no reason to change his routine when he is oblivious to the truth.

You hate him even more for his unwilling ignorance.

One of the stormtroopers grabs onto the edge of Grogu’s pram, rocking it harshly. You want to scream at him to let go, to get away from the kid, but you can’t. Only now your silence isn’t a choice, it’s a product of fear. Even if you tried to open your mouth to speak, no words would make it past the thick shard of terror sinking down your throat—but you don’t have to speak. The Mandalorian interjects first, his tone sharp enough to send a chill up your spine.

“Easy with that,” he states, visor trained on the trooper. For just the smallest moment you feel hope, not enough to fill you up, to make your chest swell and your mind swarm with thoughts of escape, but just a little flicker. It’s another act of not quite kindness. A small part of you can’t help but think that maybe he won’t leave you here, even if you know there is no reason for him to take you away from this place. He intends to collect on the bounty regardless of your desires, regardless of the fact that you have done nothing to warrant this fate.

You know It’s a silly thought as soon as you see the client.

He’s an ex imperial officer. Rather, he should be ex imperial, but the troopers around you and the clear command he holds is evidence that despite the fall of the Empire, the Empire is not truly dead, and now you and the kid are just two more not quite Jedi in their hands.

If your hands were free, everyone in the room would be tossed aside already, mere rag dolls when confronted with an energy far greater than any individual can ever truly comprehend, but the Force acts as an extension of your body, one you can’t access when your own hands hang uselessly in front of you, bound by your hips.

You can’t think, can’t breathe. The men around you are talking but you can barely process what they’re saying. All you can do is watch as the kid is passed around, concerned eyes blinking up at you, and then at the Mandalorian. The hunter keeps his own gaze angled towards the client.

“Yes, very healthy,” you hear someone say, but the words do not fully process in your mind. Suddenly, there is a hand grasping your jaw, fingers digging into the flesh of your cheeks like talons, forcing you back into the present. Cold eyes bear down on your own, lips pulling taught over teeth in a sharp grin.

This is what you’ve always been destined for.

A light shines at you, bathing your skin in a red glow, scanning for something. Whatever it is that the sensors pick up only makes the officer’s grin grow wider. He finally releases you from his grasp.

“She will do well,” the officer claims, his tone carrying barely suppressed excitement that sends a shiver down your spine.

Beside you, Grogu is crying. A man with wide, round glasses begins to pull you and the kid along behind him, heading towards a door away from the officer and the Mandalorian. You can’t bring yourself to turn back as the two discuss the hunter’s payment.

You can’t let the Mandalorian see how the air has become too thick for you to breathe with ease, filling your lungs but providing no relief. You must hide the way your eyes have finally blurred with the tears you managed to keep at bay until this moment. And you cannot bring yourself to look at the man who the Force determined to be more entangled with you than anyone else in this vast galaxy. You don’t want to see him again.

Even without turning, you can feel his eyes on you, burning as the spectacled man guides you and the child through the door and deeper into the building.

Suddenly you are glad for your silence. You are grateful for the whispers and less than subtle looks that led to you learning to always hide your mark, because a life with a man who would leave you in the hands of the Empire is not a life you want to live.

—☾—

It appears that the scan was just the first test. The spectacled man tells you as much. He tells you his name is Dr. Pershing. He tells you that he is the one who will be conducting the tests, and that there will be many more to follow.

“This will be much easier if you cooperate,” he says. “Otherwise you will be made to comply.”

He guides you to sit on a metal table, the chill of its surface immediately seeping through the thin layer of your clothes. The pram floats silently beside the doctor. Grogu’s large ears are lowered against the sides of his head, but at least he’s no longer crying.

The tests begin simply. Pershing asks questions that you choose not to answer and that Grogu is unable to answer. Instead of responding, you look around the room, taking in the sterile smell and excessively white walls. It reminds you of a medical facility with big machines, tables, and tubes laid throughout the room. Two stormtroopers remain by the door, watching silently. This is not a place you want to be. You would rather be back with the Niktos.

“When did you first realize you could do things others could not?”

“Did you have training that fostered your connection with the Force?”

“Have you ever been tested for your Midi-chlorian count?”

Your lack of cooperation becomes a growing frustration for the doctor as he continues to ask you more questions. A crease forms between his dark brows, a slight frown tugging at his lips, growing deeper each time you ignore him. He looks up from the holopad he was likely intending to take notes on before he realized you don’t plan on speaking, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose once more before speaking directly to you.

“May I remind you that your cooperation will make this whole process run much smoother,” he nearly hisses. But there is something more than frustration in his expression, despite the sharp tone of his words. Something like fear seems to flash in his eyes, even if it is only for a brief moment.

“You may,” you state, tone flat, hiding the storm of your emotions, “but it will not change anything.”

Dr. Pershing huffs out a sigh before setting the holopad back on a table.

“Then I will move forward with the other tests,” he says, stepping towards you. He attempts to guide you to lay back on the table, his brow creasing in concentration as he does, but you don’t budge.

Suddenly, there are more hands on you, pushing you down, the cold metal of the table causing your muscles to spasm in a desperate attempt to avoid contact with the uncomfortable material. The Mandalorian’s binders were removed from your wrists sometime during your initial meeting with the Imperial officer (despite the clarity of the faces around you, you can’t seem to remember anyone removing your restraints), only to be replaced with something less permanent but somehow more painful. These temporary binders are removed now, but before you can relish in the freedom of your hands and attempt to sooth what you’re certain is bruising along your wrists, your arms are once again being restrained.

Grogu ends up on a similar table. It’s more of a machine really, and you begin to panic.

“Don’t hurt him. Please,” you beg.

“I will do what I can for the child, but results will be expected,” Pershing states, his words sounding almost truthful, and you hope it’s not some sick sort of mind game, something he’s saying solely to obtain your compliance.

When he goes to draw blood from Grogu you fight to get to the child, pulling against your restraints even though doing so agitates the already sensitive skin and risks further damage to your flesh. The troopers are there to make sure that your struggle doesn’t amount to anything, and the Doctor is able to collect the blood sample that he needs.

He returns to your side to collect a sample from you as well, even while you continue to struggle as much as possible. There is not much room to move between the restraints and the stormtroopers holding you down. Pershing begins to unravel the fabric wrapped around your arm. The cloth has, thus far, protected your veins and, more importantly, your soulmark, from the doctor. He starts from the top, quickly revealing the skin of your elbow.

“Stop!” you beg. “Please don’t!” You’re not sure if he’s listening, if he takes some sort of mercy, or if he just doesn’t understand the real reason why you are pleading with him, but he unravels the fabric only enough that the second half of your mark is exposed.

I can bring you in cold.

From the moment you met the Mandalorian, your survival hasn’t been guaranteed. If the officer didn’t care if you were dead before, he sure doesn’t care if you survive what’s coming next.

It quickly becomes apparent that Dr. Pershing doesn’t care about the mark, just the tests, which require him to collect your blood in order to conduct them. You continue to struggle, but it doesn’t stop the doctor from reaching his goal.

The site where the needle enters your skin will surely form a mark because of your wriggling, another instance of your own foolish actions resulting in more pain than necessary. The doctor’s patience seems to finally reach its limit.

“I told you this would be easier if you cooperate,” he states, setting the blood sample aside before grabbing something else from his table. “One way or another you will comply.”

You feel another prick, followed by a chilling numbness that spreads from the crease of your elbow out towards the tips of your fingers and towards your chest, the sensation rapidly extending to the rest of your body. Your mind numbs with it, growing foggy and distant. For just a moment longer you think about escape, but thoughts are growing more fleeting by the second.

It becomes impossible to keep track of what is happening. Grogu is quiet beside you, the Doctor continues to flit around the two of you. Time passes but you're not sure if it’s mere moments or entire hours.

The lights go out, a quick flicker. Then another begins flashing above the door.

People rush around you. The child lays still beside you, looking around but remaining quiet.

The room is empty.

Time still passes.

—☾—

Sounds travel to you slowly. They are clouded and warped, as if they are passing through thick fog on a cold night, ringing out from directions that shouldn’t possibly be able to produce them. In the distance, or what seems to be the distance but really could be anywhere around you, blaster fire screeches out. The high pitched whine barely registers in your sluggish mind. It isn’t in the room and that’s all that matters.

There are calls for action, screams of pain and shouts of fear, more blaster fire.

Beside you Grogu remains still, dark eyes blinking towards you, unafraid. You blink back at him, your own eyes struggling to open again once they close. Everything is just so heavy.

The door slides open with a hiss, and for just a moment all of the noise sounds just a little closer. It’s all still clouded, but the commotion is not such a distant thing even if it still doesn’t seem real. A figure clad in silver armor steps through the door, reflecting the swirling red light of the lab in the same way every other surface around you flickers and shines, a warning.

It’s your Mandalorian.

As soon as the door seals behind him he rushes over to you. You can’t help but stare at his new armor—this is what your bounty was worth. More shouting comes from beyond the door and your eyes roll back in its direction, taking a while to finally reach their destination. No one else enters the room.

“Hey. Hey!” your Mandalorian says, lightly tapping your cheek until your eyes return to him. “What did they do to you?”

You can barely keep your eyes on him, your vision constantly being drawn to different things—like the child cooing next to you, or the way the flashing light reflects off the silver of the Mandalorian’s new beskar armor (real beskar, durable and rare). When you fail to respond, he begins to tug on the restraints closest to him.

Through the cloud of your mind you are aware of just one thing. You need to hide your soulmark from him. He cannot see the words he said to you scrawled across your forearm in sharp Aurebesh. You twist your arm in your restraint, doing your best to try not to think about just how heavy your muscles feel, or how much your arm aches, as you shift your soulmark so it angles towards the table. You are grateful the hunter occupies himself with the other arm first, working quickly while trying not to hurt you.

He rips away your restraints with ease, and a small part of you wonders, if you had your full strength, could you have gotten out on your own? But the thought doesn’t linger, your mind unable to focus on anything for longer than a moment.

The Mandalorian turns from you to The Child, setting him free as well. You take the opportunity to rewrap your arm, covering your soulmark once more. It’s a sloppy process, one that is difficult to complete with the weight of your muscles and ache of your wrists. Your fingers seem to have as much function as they would in the freezing cold, and keeping your mind on task proves to be difficult. You’re lucky the fabric used to cover your mark was only partially unwound.

The hunter retrieves Grogu, placing the child back into his protective pod, before helping you down off the table, tucking you into his side. Your legs collapse, unable to hold your weight, forcing the Mandalorian to bear the brunt of it, although he likely anticipated this outcome. You take a moment to get your legs back under you, just enough so that he doesn’t need to carry you. He pauses, giving you time to adjust, just as he always does.

You can’t fully comprehend what is happening as he tugs you through the building. Flashes of blaster fire cross your vision, fading into darkness as they pass. The time between blasts is never long enough to let the shadows linger. Some are aimed at you and some directed towards the stormtroopers blocking your path, courtesy of your Mandalorian.

He tries to keep you behind him, standing strong as you stumble along, shielding you and the child as much as he can with his body.

A bright red bolt, burning hot, streaks past your face and nearly makes contact. You’re too out of it to react, eyes shifting in its direction long after the shot has passed, finding nothing but shadows behind you. The hunter turns towards you for just a second, taking any oncoming fire with the shining new beskar on his back.

His leather clad hand cradles the side of your head for a mere moment, eyes burning through his visor into your own, hotter than the plasma that came so near to the place his hand now holds. His helmet flickers red as more shots go wide around the three of you. He nods, chin barely tilting down in acknowledgement of your continued safety. Then, certain that you are alive and well, he turns towards the oncoming fire once more.

You don’t know how much time you spent in the hands of the Imperials. It could have been hours or weeks, or something in between. Realistically very little time actually passed, no more than a day, but your perception of time is wrong, its passage still something you are unable to cling onto. You’re not even entirely sure how long the Mandalorian has been fighting to get you and The child out from where you've been held.

All you know is that when the hunter finally gets the three of you outside of the building, back onto the volcanic soil and into the acrid air, it’s night. There are no stars here, not like on Arvala-7. Just the ashy sky, tumbling like a storm but always too dry for rain. Or maybe it’s just your own vision that’s swimming. Now, with the horizon farther in front of you than just a wall across the room, with alleys and streets stretching long before you and lined by rows of buildings, you can tell just how far off its axis your world has become.

Everything is spinning, and you would be dragged along in the current if it weren’t for the Mandalorian’s grip on you. At some point during the firefight he passed the kid to you, freeing up his other hand. You can barely hold The Child’s weight, terrified that your grip will be too loose and you’ll lose him—or worse yet, too tight.

The Mandalorian’s words echo in your mind the closer to the ship you get, though you’re not entirely sure where his voice ends and the voice inside your head begins. What did they do to you?

You reach the main street, familiar to you despite the haze in your mind, but it looks much different than you remember. The stalls that had once been bustling are closed down for the night, the noisy crowd and plethora of smells long gone, but the street isn’t empty. There are others, bounty hunters, gathering around you on all sides.

The world spins faster. Fire streams from the Mandalorian’s wrist, stretching out towards those around you before eventually sputtering and dying once more. The night seems a little darker after that, the blaze of the flame still burning your already weak eyesight even when it’s extinguished.

You’re dragged and pushed, hidden and pulled—helpless in the face of your adversaries. All the while the Mandalorian stands before you, risking his own life to save yours and Grogu’s. He doesn’t know you’re his soulmate. He doesn’t know that you have been bound together since before your lives even began. This is a choice entirely his own. You can’t allow yourself to think about what that means right now, partially because of the circumstances you are still in, partially because you physically can’t concentrate on anything, and partially because you just don’t want to.

Time blurs again as you push further towards the starship. The arch framing the entrance of the town looms before you, a silent witness to the events that you cannot comprehend.

The world spins and then you see double, triple, quadruple of the Mandalorian.

No, that’s not quite right. The world is spinning but that is not the cause for what you see. The Mandalorian to your left wears beskar painted a color too dark for you to distinguish by the light of blaster fire. Your Mandalorian stands before you, painted in the colors of the fight around him.

You cannot concentrate on what they say when they exchange words, only picking up on a single repeated phrase:

“This is the way.”

Then, you are on the move again, stumbling forward, always forward, towards the arch above the town. Towards the ship. Towards your destiny.

—☾—

The starship is quiet.

You hadn’t realized just how loud the blasterfire had been, even through the fog in your brain, until the ramp finally raised behind you, sealing you off from the rest of the galaxy. The only sound comes from the Mandalorian’s vocoder, warping his heavy breathing into static. But he doesn’t take long to try and catch his breath. To do so would be to risk being caught once more.

He lifts you up without warning, slings you over his shoulder like it’s nothing—to him it probably is nothing, even after fighting for his life.

Somehow he manages to cradle Grogu in the same arm that he uses to keep you stable, a precarious balancing act. Then, impossibly, he manages to begin climbing the ladder to the cockpit. It’s ridiculous, you think, like a stack of farm animals standing on each other’s backs—a Mandalorian warrior, a not quite Jedi, and a 50 year old magic baby piled on the ladder.

You can’t stop the laugh that rips through your throat, the tone wobbling as the silver pauldron presses into your stomach and releases during the climb. Grogu laughs too, unaware of what exactly you find funny, just happy to join in. When a particularly rough jolt up the ladder causes your laughter to turn into a wheeze, the Mandalorian pauses. He readjusts his grip on you and the kid, then keeps climbing.

First he sets the kid down, temporarily plopping Grogu in one of the passenger seats. Then he does the same to you. He straps you into your seat, not wanting to risk you being launched onto the floor or the control panel as he brings the starship off the planet. You just stare at him, at the glint of his new, unpainted beskar and the steely gaze of his visor.

The hunter picks Grogu up again, placing him on a cuisse covered thigh and leaving a hand on the kid to act as a seatbelt. The ship starts with a purr, engines whirring as the Mandalorian presses a series of buttons and flips several switches. There’s some turbulence as the ship cuts through the atmosphere before leaving the ashen planet behind. In no time at all you are among the stars, body lurching as you make the jump into hyperspace.

The Mandalorian’s armor catches the light of the universe as the stars blur all around you, the transparisteel surrounding you allowing for every inch of him to be bathed in the flickering glow of distant suns. It’s as if the galaxy has come alive on his armor, painting the beskar in ever-changing streaks of light and color. It shifts and dances even more as he moves from his spot at the helm.

He returns the child to the second passenger seat, the hunter no longer needing to worry about the kid falling as he had feared during the ascent. Hyperspace offers protection, freedom. You can’t help but stare at the Mandalorian as he returns back to his seat, his own gaze angled towards the stars before him. Your mind is still hazy, but you are unable to focus on anything other than the resplendent man who sits before you.

You’re so beautiful, you think.

For a moment you fear you’ve said the words out loud. The Mandalorian’s shoulders grow stiff, back straightening slightly from where he sits in the pilot’s seat. But he doesn’t turn towards you, and he doesn’t speak. Surely if you had spoken he would have something to say as well, something along the usual lines of “I’ve been waiting for so long,” or even “Why didn’t you say anything?” It must just be the fog drifting through your brain, an unfounded paranoia. Your exit from the planet was rough, after all, both the firefight and the atmospheric turbulence. Some lingering tension is to be expected.

It’s not until you’re well on your way through hyperspace, safe from any of your would be pursuers, that the Mandalorian says anything at all. His star stained helmet turns towards you, the black of his visor burning just as bright as it had when he cradled your head not so long ago.

“My name’s Din,” he says. “Din Djarin.”

NEXT PART

a/n: Next chapter we will get some of Din’s perspective!

taglist: @unmitigatedsuperiority @haven-is-happy @sorrow-has-a-place-here @unofficialavenger90

I don’t have a taglist form, but if you would like to be tagged on future chapters you can let me know in the tags/an ask/etc. this is a sideblog so I can’t respond to replies ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#din djarin #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #din djarin x y/n #din djarin x fem!reader #din djarin fanfiction #the mandalorian #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian fanfiction

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animalcopingnewhorizons · 4 months

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I've been on Tumblr now for over 1 year. 🎉 I thought it might be time to (re)introduce myself and how I've been handling this account.

My name is Layla. I'm almost 42 years old. ♑☀️♒🌙♓⬆️ I just started a personal Tumblr that you're welcome to follow if you want to learn more about me. @trauma-tits (Named after my weekly newsletter. I write a few other places on the internet too.)

Animal Crossing New Horizons is the only Animal Crossing game I've played. I love it so much that I can't move on to other video games because I'd rather be playing ACNH. I've only had one island called Praxis, but I hope to start a new one very soon! (In full disclosure, I've been saying that for months and life keeps getting in the way.)

I usually have my finger on the pulse of fresh posts, but you'll never know that because I reblog everything to the queue which hovers around 300 at all times. I use reblogging in real time to indicate when things aren't from the queue as opposed to marking everything that is. On Fridays, I hit "shuffle queue" and sometimes tweak the times and number of posts.

I've been sharing screenshots from my island Praxis with acnh praxis, animal crossing, animal crossing new horizons, acnh, acnh screenshots, acnh life, & animal crossing creations, and the vacation homes I've decorated in Happy Home Paradise with happy home paradise, happy home designer, happy home dlc, acnh happy home paradise, and acnh exterior or acnh interior as relevant.

Other tags I use:

ac [villager name] and acnh [villager name] because I couldn't remember which one I started with so to ensure I can go back and find things I do both on each post that highlights a villager to remain consistent.

If there is more than one villager showcased, I usually try to tag each one individually. However, if I am in a hurry or I don't know all the villagers and don't have time to look them up, I will use the general acnh villagers. I try to also use acnh [species name], especially if the post is solely one species.

Anything regarding dialogue (photo edited or organic) I use acnh dialogue or ac dialogue if it isn't New Horizons.

acnh codes, custom codes, and acnh custom design for the codes. This is not my strong suit, so any custom stuff you see in my screenshots someone else created (unless otherwise specified). I do not usually share the codes in each post since they aren't mine, but if you ask for them, I'll share.

For dream address posts I also use the tag i really need to start dreaming again because I haven't done it in awhile.

acnh inspiration is for anything that I see that makes me go, "Wow, I wish I was playing right now because this has INSPIRED me!" I never use this tag on my own posts, only rbs of others. If I rb your post with that, you should take it as the HIGHEST compliment. 😘

If there is crossover content between AC and other fandoms, I use when worlds collide, and sometimes I even share crossovers where I am not familiar with the other one.

I love it when people like, reblog, comment, and use my ask box. I love talking to strangers (because a stranger is just a friend you haven't made yet) and I love answering questions. I really like the animal crossing community, and I love making new friends. 💞

I'm still trying to figure out when I should be writing my commentary in the body of the reblog and when it should be a tag instead. If there are other tags you think I should be using to get posts on your dash, lmk. Oh, and I also love it when people go down my page and like a bunch of posts, so don't hesitate to pop over to this account anytime you have the urge. 💕

Thanks for reading this novel of a post, and I hope you're having a day! 💟

#this is a love letter to my followers #added a personal pic just for kicks #big noses are beautiful #this pic is from a date night last month #animal crossing community #words words words

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crowleyscat · 1 year

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Confessions of a Cat

Square: E2 - Creature: Feline Title: Confessions of a Cat Rating: T Wordcount: 1803 Ship(s): Dream/Hob Warnings: None Additional tags: Canon Compliant, Fluff, First Kiss, Touch-Starved Dream of the Endless | Morpheus, Actual Cat Dream of the Endless | Morpheus Summary:

“Y’know,” Hob mused, his hand pausing in its motions and moving from the cat to help him type more quickly. The cat clearly disapproved of this. It shifted even closer to Hob, lifting its head up to rest on top of his arm and nuzzle against his hand. Hob chuckled, losing his train of thought as he twisted his hand around to continue petting the cat. “You’re a needy one, aren’t you? For a cat that kept hissing at passersby, you’re really enjoying the attention now.”

If Hob didn’t know any better, he’d say that the bloody cat huffed at him. Regardless, it didn’t stop snuggling into him and purring like an engine.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/44837083 (written for @dreamlingbingo <3) Fic posted under the cut!

Hob stared at the guest relaxing by the door to the New Inn.

The cat stared back impassively.

“Um,” said Hob intelligently. On occasion, there would be the odd cat that hung around the back door of the New Inn hunting for scraps. Never in Hob’s life had he seen a cat like this, though. It was a massive creature, all thick, sleek black fur and piercing eyes. He felt like it was staring directly into his soul as it licked the back of its paw. Something about the cat was strangely familiar, but he couldn’t quite place why. “Hello?”

Perhaps against his better judgement, Hob held out his hand to the cat. It was massive, yes, and a bit intimidating. That didn’t mean it wasn’t friendly. After all, it looked well-groomed and taken care of, so maybe it belonged to one of the houses in the area.

To his surprise, the cat rose from where it had settled itself beneath one of the outside picnic tables and, with a big stretch, leapt on top of it so it could bump its head against Hob’s hand. Hob grinned. As he scratched behind the cat’s ears, it let out a rumbling purr, pushing further into Hob’s touch like it couldn’t get enough of it.

“Oh, aren’t you lovely? Such a handsome cat,” Hob cooed, stroking down the cat’s body. He’d always had a love-hate relationship with cats in the past. As cute as they could be, you could never quite predict what their next move was. One minute they could be purring up a storm, and the next they could be scratching you and bolting away before you had time to blink. He hoped this cat would continue to be kind. It was beautiful and regal, its fur so soft and silky that Hob wanted to gather the cat up in his arms and hug it tightly (which, in past experiences, he knew would be a recipe for disaster).

A few people stopped by the door as they came and went from the inn to see what all the fuss was about. Upon seeing the cat, they would gasp and stretch out to stroke it. However, instead of accepting the pets, the cat would raise its hackles and hiss at them until they left it alone.

The weirdest thing was that it would then turn back to (an understandably wary) Hob and nuzzle back against his hand, demanding more attention.

What a strange cat, indeed.

Eventually, Hob was brought back to reality when a particularly chilly breeze sent a shiver down his body. Right, there was a warm flat and a hot drink waiting for him upstairs after his frosty walk home (and, less appealingly, the unfortunate necessity of having to spend the evening grading essays).

He gave the cat a final pat on the head and dropped his hand, trying not to feel guilty when it looked at him in what almost seemed like disappointment. “Sorry,” he said to the cat, immediately feeling stupid at apologising to a cat of all things. Well, it was probably for the best. They could be vengeful little buggers. “I should be getting inside now. You should go home.”

Hob wandered over to the door to his flat at the side of the inn and unlocked it. As soon as he began to push it open, he felt a large, fluffy body weave through his legs and watched, slack-jawed, as the cat trotted up the stairs without looking back. For a moment, he glanced around helplessly, unsure where to go from here. It wasn’t his cat! He shouldn’t just be letting random cats into his flat, right?

Any thoughts of kicking the cat out vanished when he entered his living room and found the cat curled up amongst the cushions on his sofa. His heart melted. With how cold it was outside, he didn’t blame it for seeking out the nearest warmth. Since it had been nothing but friendly with him, Hob decided to let it stay for the evening, at least.

Hob left the room to hang up his bag and coat and get changed into more comfortable clothes. Then, after brewing himself a cup of tea and grabbing his laptop, he returned to the living room and plopped onto the sofa next to the cat. It lifted its head from where it had been resting on its paws to blink at him slowly. Its eyes were unusual, upon closer look. Dark as obsidian with pinpricks of light glinting in its dilated pupils.

As he mulled that thought over, he booted up his laptop and opened up the folder of essays to begin marking. His free hand drifted to the cat at his side, absentmindedly scritching at its head. Its deep purr was even louder in the quiet of Hob’s flat, rolling thunder a gentle vibration against his leg as the cat pressed itself closer to him.

If Hob didn’t know any better, he’d say that the bloody cat huffed at him. Regardless, it didn’t stop snuggling into him and purring like an engine.

“What was I saying before?” Hob hummed. When the cat looked up at him again with that intense gaze, it came back to him in a rush. “Oh yeah! That’s it. You remind me of a friend of mine, if he was a cat. Kind of, at least.” He paused to consider, scratching underneath the cat’s chin. “His eyes are so much like yours. The kind of eyes that look like a night sky. Jesus Christ, I could only dream of him being this affectionate though.” Caught up in his ramble, Hob didn’t notice the way the cat stiffened slightly, its purrs tapering off. “Sure, he’s been less elusive since I finally saw him in the summer and he told me his name, but I can never tell what he’s thinking! He just turns up whenever he pleases – which is every other week or so now, so I can’t complain too much – and we go out for a drink or food or whatever and have a good chat whilst I try to work out if he’d let me hold his hand, then before I can ask him if he wants to come back to mine or if he’d class these outings as ‘dates’, he just fucks off again!” He sighed heavily, head flopping against the back of the sofa. “Ugh. Why am I venting to a cat of all things? I swear to God, Dream is driving me fucking insane.”

“I didn’t realise you felt that way about me, Hob Gadling.”

Hob let out a very unmanly screech, shooting to his feet and toppling his laptop and the cat off from where it had climbed half into his lap onto the floor.

“The fuck? Dream?”

To Hob’s horror, the cat hopped back up onto the sofa, levelled him with an all-too-familiar stare, and spoke. “Yes, that’s me. You were saying?”

Hob gaped at him. “You’re a cat?”

“To some,” said Dream, sounding a little more impatient. Had Hob not been in such a state of shock, he would have chastised him for yet another vague answer to his questions. “Perhaps you will find this conversation less baffling if I transform back into my human body.”

There was a flash that caused Hob to automatically shut his eyes, and when he opened them again, Dream – the tall, handsome, human-shaped being Dream – was now sitting where the cat had been.

“Now, might you elaborate on what you were saying before in regards to our meetups?”

“Well, I, uh–” Hob spluttered, before getting a hold of himself in a sudden burst of agitation. “You know what! No! How about you tell me why you were slinking around my home as a cat demanding my attention and affection?”

Dream pursed his lips, eyebrows furrowing into a frown. He’d clearly not expected that response. Hob delighted in watching the cogs turn in his brain to figure out how to reply without revealing too much.

“Is it true that you wish for me to be more affectionate with you?”

Hob threw his hands up in the air, defeated. He collapsed back onto the sofa beside Dream. “Guess I did say that, didn’t I? I’d like that a lot, yeah. Though as nice and soft as you are in cat form, I’d like it even more if you were in this form.”

“And, you want us to go out on… dates?”

Hob closed his eyes briefly and took a breath to contemplate his life’s choices up until now. “Yes, Dream, I want us to go on dates, if you would be interested. But it’s fine if you’re not.”

Glancing over at Dream, Hob found him looking somewhat thrown off guard. When he took too long to respond, Hob decided to gently press him further.

“Dream, why did you come here?”

“I wanted…” Dream trailed off. “I wanted the same as you, I suppose. I just didn’t know how to ask for it.”

“So you’re telling me that you barged your way into my flat and cuddled up to me pretending to be a real cat because you didn’t know how to ask me to, fuck I don’t know, give you a hug?”

“And more. I want more than that.”

“Yeah?” Hob raised his eyebrows, not suppressing the grin that was beginning to creep onto his lips. He leant closer to Dream – just a little – and was pleased when Dream leant towards him too. “What else do you want?”

Something flashed in Dream’s eyes. “This.” With no other warning, Dream framed Hob’s face with his hands and pulled him into a bruising kiss. Hob’s surprised noise was muffled against Dream’s lips, but he quickly sank into it, clutching at the front of Dream’s shirt like a lifeline. When they eventually broke apart, Hob could feel the warm blush on his cheeks.

“Yeah, I want that too,” Hob murmured, smiling under the heat of Dream’s searching gaze. “For as long as you’re willing to give it to me.”

A purr rumbled in the back of Dream’s throat as he nudged his forehead against Hob’s. “Then, you’ll find that we’ll be together for a very long time.” Hob’s smile only grew bigger.

“Sounds good to me.”

#dreamling #dream x hob #dream of the endless #morpheus #hob gadling #the sandman #dreamling fic

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