#this had to have been made by a white person lmfao

[insufferableprotagonistpoll]

Propaganda why Tony Stark is insufferable:

>Makes weapons

>Billionaire

>Made multiple AI Surveillance Robots

>Gaslight a child into fighting a super soldier in a foreign country for him

>His fans are annoying

Portrayed as a hero because? He chose to no longer mass produce war weapons and bombs after suffering the consequences. Huge hypocrite. Doesn't care about anyone but himself. Will backstab people if they believe in human rights when it's inconvenient to him. Seen as a hero while he's the personification of privileged people saying they're not privileged

There’s the usual “he’s a war criminal who only felt bad about it when he realized his weapons were killing white Americans as well as Arab people” reason, and also he’s just super annoying. You had to be there for the original Avengers shitty dialogue a la “we have a Hulk” that had Tumblr in a vicious chokehold. Also he was supposed to FINALLY go away after destroying all his suits in Iron Man 3 but he just… didn’t! Which is bullshit.

Tony is so annoying. When they first meet he straight up bullies Peter into fighting for his personal bullshit, insults and objectifies Aunt May in front of him, spits into his trashcan and is in general being pushy af. He blackmails Peter when he doesn’t wanna come to Germany with him AND HE DOESNT EVEN EXPLAIN WHY HE WANTS HIM TO COME. Uncomfortable vibes lol.

Tony being the one to tell peter “if Captain America wanted to hurt you he would’ve” when Peter was trying to state his case, yet HE’S also the one who put Peter in harms way when he didn’t even want to go with him???

Telling Peter that he should stick to being a “friendly neighborhood Spider-Man” (stealing his thing once again) when that’s what Peter _was_ doing before Tony took him out of his zone and filled his head with grander things to be apart of….bitch? Die. Ohh waaaait (jkjk) but yeah

Super long, sorry lol

Thinking about how in Homecoming when Peter accidentally caused that boat to get split in half because the Vulture’s gun exploded and Tony was acting like as if Peter was completely in the wrong for going there just because he did it without his permission. He was acting like as if Peter was out of line and “disobeyed him”, trying to act like his father. And then I remember how in CACW he’s the one who scouted Peter in the first place just because he saw he might be useful against a personal squabble between him and Captain America despite knowing that he was a kid and he’s just now acknowledging how dangerous it is because Peter “acted on his own”

Completely hijacking Peter’s superhero story and trying to control his every move (Training wheels protocol and baby monitor thing he put in the suit), acting like Peter should’ve known that Tony would send someone in despite the fact that he’d been ignoring him for 2 months since Civil War and not keeping him updated on anything!!

How the hell is peter supposed to know Tony is going to listen to him when he treats him like a kid instead of a superhero when it’s convenient for him? And when Tony loses his temper after Peter says he’s 15 not 14 like “the adult is talking” bitch he could literally flatten you without your suit!!!

I guess in a way he is acting like a father but like the absentee kind. He’s more like a sperm donor father trying to act like he has any rights over Peter’s life smh.

It’s not that reprimanding Peter for the situation is bad, but the way he makes it seem as if Peter is irredeemable as if Tony wasn't a literal weapons dealer lmfao. He could’ve said what was the truth about it without completely invalidating him saying shit like “no thanks to you” after Peter asked if everyone is okay when it’s literally thanks to Peter finding a lead on those guys in the first place that they were even noticed and it’s not like the FBI being there could’ve in no way caused a similar situation.

And then near the end of the movie when he’s getting crushed by the building rubble screaming and crying for someone to help him where the fuck is Tony?? That scene just proved that he never needed Tony’s suit in the first place to be Spider-Man since he had to use 100% his own strength to lift it off of him. I know he would’ve found the motivation even if Tony hadn’t been involved in the first place to give him the suit, take it away from him and have the words “if you’re nothing without the suit you shouldn’t have it“ echo in his head. Why did Tony even take the suit away? Like as if he expects Peter to stop being spoderman without it??? Holy fuck. This is why you don’t make it out of endgame /j /srs.

When Tony took this suit away from Peter he was like “God I sound like my dad“ shouldn’t that be a red flag to him? Wasn’t he literally just saying that he wished his dad was better than he was?? Lmfao

Propaganda why Victor Frankenstein is insufferable:

Victor Frankenstein is so pathetic not even tumblr could love him. The best parts of Frankenstein are the ones where your blessedly saved from being in his whiny, self deprecating, self centered pov. He’s so conceited that when his creation tells him directly “In revenge for killing the wife you were making for me I’m going to kill YOUR wife to see how YOU like it!”, Victor Frankenstein thinks that the creation is going to kill him and *only* him. (A decision And on top of it, he’s a shitty dad. Truly the worst.

this fucker has zero self awareness, which could maybe be fun to read about! except that 3/4 of the book consists of him constantly woe-is-me-ing about his own mistakes and how he shouldn't be responsible for any of his own actions.

He's not irredeemable, but his refusal to take accountability til it's too late is irritating

#tony stark #mcu #victor frankenstein #frankenstein or the modern prometheus #insufferable protagonist poll #insufferable protagonist tournament #tournament poll

[chaoticbardlady99]

Hello! I really enjoyed your fic with the Tav who couldn’t see well. It was really sweet! If you’re still accepting requests, may I request a similar one where the reader needs glasses to see and during a battle they break or get lost. Now they can’t see well and they’re trying not to panic while there’s threats everywhere, but thankfully Astarion notices something’s wrong and helps them. Thank you!

Admiring from Afar (GN! AFAB Reader x Astarion) Part 1- MDNI 18+ ONLY

Part Title is inspired by the song “She” by Dodie (I feel like it reflects Astarion’s POV/feelings towards Tav in this story)

This was not originally supposed to be as long as it is, but the concept started taking on a life of it's own. I hope you enjoy! I will hopefully be positing Part 2 within the next few days!

  CW: Angst (?), violence, jealousy, fluffy (hopefully very? But who knows), smut because apparently I’m in a giving mood (I’m sorry I had to make the joke.), MDNI 18+ only, dom/sub sexual relationship.

Note- this is Unascended Astarion x GN! reader

*This has been proof read one time. It is 2:04 am and I have work in 6 hours LMFAO

Gif belongs to- ibacchante from Tumblr!

    The campfire crackles in the distance and you think you even hear the faint sound of music.  You desperately yearn to be near the warmth of the fire talking to or watching one of your companions give a dramatic retelling of their experiences in battle.

  The warmth of your companions made places like the Shadow-Curse Land feel a lot less scary and foreign- they provide some normalcy in this strange journey. 

Unfortunately, you are hunched over in your cold tent with nothing but a light cantrip and your will power. You squint as you etch details into the oxen bone, taking the time to add the touches of silvery white dye to add an ethereal effect. Your hands cramp as you work to keep the paint within the designs you carved into the bone.

You have been painstakingly working on this necklace for a little over a month- maybe two? You have lost count at this point, but the calluses on your fingers tell you it’s been a while now since you started this project.

  You polish the bone with your cloth, wiping away the debris from your knife. You admire your handiwork; a perfect carving of the Elven Rune- Cadaith. You were able to create a loop at the top of the necklace for the long, thin, black leather strip you had been holding onto since the day after the Tiefling party- the same day you decided to take on this hand numbing project.

  You and your crew of oddballs had come through for the locals and obliterated the Goblin Camp Leaders- the tieflings had come to your camp and had decided to celebrate.

  It wasn’t that you were opposed to parties, but you’re not the most social person despite your profession as an Artisan. You miss the calm, quiet group of Druids you used to travel with- you even miss the hardwood floor of the Caravans and how much of a pain in the ass they were to fix. You miss not having to spend every waking moment and all of your strength on battling and the art of deception. You miss your tools and the landscapes you use to find your resources. You love to make crafts out of anything in the wild.

 Back to the rowdy tiefling party- again, you aren’t necessarily against parties, but they are overwhelming.

And the men! They are entirely too vulgar after a couple drinks. Silvanus help you if you had another drunk man stumble up to you and ask if he can, “fuck your brains out.” 

 Another man had begun to make his way towards you when you felt a cold hand grab you by the elbow and haul you off into the forest. It had been Astarion- who you had agreed to share a bed with that night. You had shared a bed before- after a camp party to celebrate killing Auntie Ethel, but nothing could have prepared you for the second time and how mind-blowing it would be (you had been excruciatingly awkward as it was your first time ever- he was pretty understanding thank Gods).

  “Astarion-”

  “Yes Darling?”

   He stops and looks at you- you look around and realize you are far from camp. You fiddle with your hands nervously- picking at your nails. 

“I um-” you clear your throat, “I really appreciate you- well- um… coming to my rescue, but I really don’t want to be a bother to you- you don’t need to stay wit-”

 You hadn’t been able to finish your sentence before he was gently kissing you. Your body feels like it’s on fire, your glasses are entirely foggy from your breathing and you smile at him coyly as he pulls away. He gives you a genuine, real laugh before taking your glasses off and wiping them clean for you. You put them on, your eyes back in focus as you avoid his eyes.

He leans in and begins kissing along your neck, along your jawline, and back to your lips. He kisses you roughly, his tongue flicking across your lower lip, asking for access. He lifts you up from under your thighs before backing you into a tree. 

  He grinds up into you- his erection pressed against the burning heat in your core. He pulls at your shirt strings and gives you a look as if to ask if he can continue. You grab his face in your hands and kiss him as an answer to his question. 

  He discards your shirt and makes quick work of your trousers and under garments- all while kissing you so deeply the world is spinning and your entire body feels numb. 

  Suddenly he has you on your back as he smiles down at you mischievously. You look away, embarrassed as he takes in the sight of your body; a breathy chuckle leaves his lips as he gets up and makes quick work of his own clothes.

 You feel the space between your legs grow warmer and needier as you watch him stroke himself before he settles himself between your legs. He presses soft kisses all over your face as he inserts a finger between your folds and begins to toy with your clit. You whimper and moan as he pumps his finger in and out of you.

  “Good girl,” he growls into your ear and inserts another finger, picking up the pace.

  A soft, gasp escapes your lips as your walls stretch to fit around his other finger- getting to the point of borderline tears as you feel your orgasm get closer and closer. Astarion watches you use a stream of profanities, your hands gripping the grass so hard it's ripping. He kisses you on your forehead then- he stops. 

 You keen in protest from the emptiness between your thighs, but your words die on your lips as he pushes himself all the way between your folds, all the way to the hilt. You claw at his back, a pleased whimper escaping your mouth. He begins to kiss your jaw before you capture his lips with yours- he’s still not moving inside of you as you kiss him feverishly- your hands entangling themselves in his hair. He groans against your lips, holding you down by your waist and not allowing you to move. When you attempt to move your hips upward, desperate to get some friction, he groans in your mouth before pulling out completely and then thrusting himself roughly back into you. You look at him in anticipation as he gets off of you, still inside you as he adjusts your left leg so that he can get more access and he begins to massage your sore, neglected nipples with his fingers. 

You are desperate for any movement from him and you can tell he knows it- even in your drunken haze. 

 “Please.”

“Please what, my dear?”

 He says before pulling out to thrust into you completely again. You cry out, tears streaming down your face as you look away from him, trying not to let him have the satisfaction.. 

  He hums as he roughly grabs your jaw, making you look him in the eyes.

 “Tell me, Darling,” a sly, teasing smile on his beautiful face, “do you want me to fuck your brains out?”

You nod and he pinches your nipples roughly- you arch your back and you feel him lift your hips up before spanking you hard.

"You don't get anything until you answer my question," he goads, his hand snaking it's way around your throat, "so tell me, do you want me to fuck your brains out?"

"Y-es. Yes I want you to fuck me ple-" he cuts you off with a snap of his hips.

He grabs your jaw roughly with his hands, "You know that's not what I asked you."

He begins to slowly move in and out of you, teasing you mercilessly. You groan in frustration- he knows he’s the only person who can say this to you and demand you to say it back to him.

"Please Astarion," you say tearfully, your need for pleasure taking over, "please fuck my brains out."

He smiles at you widely, "it would be my pleasure."

You whine and he pulls out of you, rolling you over onto your hands and knees. He comes up behind you and his hands find purchase in your hair as he begins to pound into your mercilessly. You lose yourself in pleasure- surely alerting everyone and their mothers to your activites- and if it's not the vulgar moans, it's the filthy sound of your bodies colliding.

He pulls you up to his chest by your hair, switching to putting his hand around the upper part of your throat, and puts his fangs to your neck, teasing the skin as he fucks up into you. You have one of your hands wrapped around his arm as he chokes you and the other is touching your clit- the coil of pleasure building up in your stomach as you whisper your consent between moans for Astarion to drink from you. He gives you a pleased hum in response.

The moment his fangs are piercing your neck is the same moment your orgasm rips through you and you have to fight not to slump against him. You feel his strong arms hold you up as he keeps fucking your sensitive mound, chasing his own orgasm. He stops sucking from the bite marks on your neck, lapping up the blood that begins to slowly trickle down towards your shoulders and chest. He let’s go of his grip on your throat and pushes you back onto your belly before roughly inserting himself inside you again.

"You are such a good girl," he grunts, "you are taking me so fucking well."

You begin to feel lightheaded when he finally cums inside you. Good thing you have a potion for that.

You both get your clothes on and he whisks you away to his tent- where you cuddled and talked for almost the entire night.

  The sex, as noted, is amazing, but you also enjoy so much more of him than just his body. You know Astarion struggles to believe you find anything about him interesting outside of sex, so you make a point of reminding him about all the other wonderful parts of him and you don't ever ask for sex or sexual favors. That ball is in his playing field as far as you are concerned.

You find yourself gravitating back to Astarion’s tent every night to listen about a new book he is reading or just to let him shower you with (arguably) questionable knowledge about the higher ups in Badlur's Gate . Sometimes you just talk about your lives, tangled in each other’s embraces, and falling asleep that way.

You had begun sleeping in the same tent shortly after he drank from you for the first time. You had been scared during a storm one night and he had heard you sniffling in your tent. You missed the safety of your Caravan during those first two weeks. 

  He had quickly dragged you over to his tent- griping about his hair, how “I told you that you needed better camping equipment”, and “really darling? Why are you wearing clothes with holes in them? No wonder you’re scared.”

    You have had an incredibly close bond ever since and you speak very freely with one another. You still become closed off every now and then (mostly from being socially and emotionally exhausted) but he was content to sit in the silence and just be in each other’s company. If he's in a grouchy mood, you sit with him in silence or let him just talk at you, and you support him when he wakes up from a particularly grueling nightmare. You rarely, if ever, go to your tent or stay in your tent anymore.

  However, your current passion project was not to be seen by his eyes until it was completely finished- hence the reason why you are in your freezing, semi abandoned tent. You enchant the amulet with “Invisibility” and after a test, you can proudly say your necklace for Astarion is ready.

  Shortly after the fight with the Goblins, Astarion had been complaining to you about how Gale “ate” the last necklace of Invisibility that they had found. 

  “He did call finders-keepers.”

 “Finders-keepers my ass, Darling. If he really believed that rule he wouldn’t have inhaled it the way he did right after finding it.”

  “It was rather unbecoming of him, wasn’t it?”

 “Cazador has done a lot of horrible, vile things to me over the last two centuries,” he scoffs, “but, Gale eating a perfectly good Amulet of Invisibility has somehow landed in the top 20 of worst things to happen to me.” 

  After that, you began your work on the Amulet and now that it’s finished- you get to give it to him.

 The idea makes your stomach turn. 

  What if he hates it?

  It’s not really his style, but you don’t make gaudy jewelry and you tried your best to make it look like it shimmers (you succeeded FYI, Nat 20 all the way). You hope he appreciates it on principle alone and doesn’t criticize you too harshly if he dislikes it. When you ran the idea by Karlach and showed her your sketch, she was immediately convinced that he would adore your gift.

“Don’t worry about a thing Soldier,” she said cheerily, “Fangs is going to adore it as much as he adores you!”

  You wrap the necklace in the nice, silk handkerchief and stuff it into the little leather bag. You take one final deep breath before pushing through the tent flap. You look around camp and see that mostly everyone is in their tent- Astarion included- but Wyll is by the fire dancing. You remember joking about him giving a demonstration for the camp. As you begin to walk towards Astarion’s tent- Wyll calls out to you.

 “Tav,” he says brightly, “join me for a dance?”

 Another thing you love about Astarion- he is very good at telling people ‘no’ for you. Yes, you should be sticking up for yourself and setting boundaries on your own. You are so wired to make everyone else happy that it impedes your ability to say no. Astarion is helping you learn and supports you when you freeze up, but Astarion is not here in this moment and if he hears what Wyll has said to you- he has made no indication of it.

  You smile tightly and put the pouch in your pocket before taking his hand. You are basically robotic as you go through the motions and yet- for some Gods forsaken reason Wyll plants a kiss right on your lips. As he pulls back and sees your look of absolute horror- he begins to apologize profusely. 

 “Honestly Wyll,” you awkwardly squeak out,”it’s totally fine. I just- um- well… I really like Astarion and I’m not looking elsewhere.”

 “I understand and as disappointed as I am- I am grateful for your forgiveness and I hope we can remain friends.”

 You smile brightly, “Thank you Wyll and of course. Good night.”

 He bids you farewell and you walk with extra pep in your step. You set a boundary and you are over the moon excited to share with Astarion. 

  Except when you get inside the tent- all of your stuff is right in the entryway. Astarion has his back facing you and is pretending to be interested in a book. You frown.

 “Star?”

 “Oh don’t worry Darling- I figured I would save you the uncomfortable conversation,” he says with apathy in his voice, “we both know those aren’t your strong suite.”

  You flinch at his cold, blank tone and the harshness of his words. You feel yourself becoming consumed with confusion and hurt. Your hand is clutching onto the pouch in your pocket. He looks at you and he looks far away despite the smile on his face.

 “Well go along now, I’m sure your new lover is waiting for you. I’m happy for you honestly,” he pauses, giving you a cold, malicious grin, “pretending to be invested in this connection has really been bothersome these last couple weeks.”

  Logically, a part of you knows he is just jealous and is lashing out. You should stay and try to explain what happened- reassure him even? 

  Emotionally? You feel like you just got stabbed over and over again. Oh and then someone came up to you and used a shocking grasp. You try to open your mouth, the tears welling in your eyes as you look at him. 

  He just looks at you coldly, “Well, leave.”

  You wordlessly nod, dropping the leather pouch back into your pocket and you grab your things and numbly head back over to your tent. You roll out your bed roll and stare up at the dark tarp above your head; you let the tears stream down your face as silent sobs wrack your body. You already miss him.

 _________________________________________________

  You didn’t sleep well that night- you woke up with puffy eyes and a sore throat. You had spent the majority of the night freezing and jumping at every noise. You would get the occasional thirty minutes of sleep here and there, but if you weren’t scared awake, your bruised, broken heart woke you up. Your heart thumped unevenly all night- worried the bumps in the night were Astarion packing up his things and leaving. 

  Your chest aches as you get ready to leave and you are grateful that the Shadow-Cursed Lands are so poorly lit because it allows you to hide the rough night you have. You are also grateful to see Astarion is still here.

You, Astarion, Shadowheart, Karlach, and Wyll set out to explore more of the Shadowlands. Karlach told Astarion he didn’t have to go if he didn’t want to- you were too tired to say anything in response to his complaints and you suppose Karlach became fed up. He’s quiet after that, so quiet you think he might have left. Except you hear him chatting with Wyll during a short rest.

  Shadowheart walks happily next to you- chittering about Dark Justiciars and how she can feel Shar or whatever. You are just trying to focus on her and stop thinking about him. You have been successful in avoiding him and not looking at him for the entirety of the morning and you need to keep it that way. 

  _________________________________________________

   Astarion can’t place where in the conversation he went wrong, but the fight with Malus Thorm has been nothing short of a disaster. The Sisters are ruthless and Malus is much stronger than any of them anticipated at first glance.

  Astarion usually fights right at your side, but he assumes that your new lover will be keeping you safe. He suppresses the bile and tears that threaten to come up. He has your protection still and he knows that because Wyll would have thrown him out of camp otherwise. He was never meant to end up with you- you were always meant to be a means to an end.

If anything, he should be thrilled for you. Wyll is a good, decent man and much worthier of your affections than Astarion could ever be.

 So why does it hurt so fucking much? And why did he want to kick Wyll over a ravine when he kissed you?

He shakes the thought as he strikes down two more Sisters. He steals a glance in Wyll’s direction (to check on you) and immediately notices that you are nowhere in the premises and the Blade of Frontiers was battling with Karlach. Astarion scans the room in a frenzy of panic.

   He turns around just in time to see Malus lift you up by your neck and fling you into a column. Your glasses fell to the ground as your back makes contact with the stone and the sound of shattering bones echoes through the room as the Sisters begin to move forward.

 Astarion watches in horror as you are struggling to pop up and begin touching the floor around you , but by the time you seem to realize finding your glasses is a moot effort- the Sisters descend on you as Malus turns his attention to Wyll and Karlach.

  Wyll acknowledges what just happened, but doesn’t go to help you. Anger rips through Astarion like a wildfire as Wyll turns and tells Shadowheart you need help. He’s about to help Malus take out Wyll- until another scream for help pierces the air as you throw random cantrips at your attackers.

 Astarion rushes forward, cutting his way through the remaining Sisters in the middle of the room. He really could give a shit less at this time if it pisses Wyll off that he was the one who protected you- in fact, he’s probably going to be stabbing Wyll when you all get back to camp. 

  Astarion destroys the Sisters surrounding you in a flurry of gore and steel. He ignores his other companions as he searches for you frantically. 

  You had disappeared by the time he came to your aid. Astarion knows that you have a tendency to slip into your Cat form when you are particularly scared and can’t see- using the animal’s powerful nose to guide you away from danger. 

 Astarion goes near the beds and crouches down- a sigh escaping his lips. 

  All 8 pounds of you and your black fluff is crouched under the bed and you hiss in surprise when he clicks his tongue at you. You squint your eyes at him before sniffing the air. You cautiously walk forward and sniff his outreached hand. You begin to purr loudly and rub your head against his knuckles.

 He laughs with a mix of hysteria and joy as the realization that you are okay settles into his bones.

 “It’s okay Little Love, the Sisters are dead,” he says softly, “I’m so sorry, I should have been next to you. I just assumed a beast with such prowess as yourself would be able to fend for themselves.”

 You meow in indignation as you climb on top of him to bite the tip of his nose and he can’t help but laugh. 

“Does your ego hurt less now, Little Love?”

You give him an amused look that makes him bust out laughing again.

He had asked you once why you were just a Black domestic cat instead of a Panther. You had argued that you are just as ferocious as a Panther in that form. Not to mention, you would have a better chance of shooting an arrow straight than turning into a Panther, but you weren’t about to admit that (even though he knows). 

   Astarion scoops you up in his arms and pauses- the smell of your blood floods his senses. He grabs you by your scruff and you yelp as he inspects you for injuries. 

  You scratch at his hand and he drops you. You yowl in pain and leer at him as you begin to change back into your humanoid form. 

If Astarion was capable of feinting, this would have been that moment. He drops to his knees beside you and begins trying to find a healing potion to take the edge off.

  You have a compound fracture where your shin was and it’s bleeding heavily. Your right shoulder is out of place, your left wrist is twisted in an atypical fashion, and your left cheek is blooming with an angry, purple bruise. He winces when you inhale a sharp breath as you try to breathe in, clutching at your rib cage. 

He doesn’t catch the choked gasp that climbs up his throat in time- your eyes search for him in the dark before finally settling on him.

“Your beautiful eyes are really helpful when it’s blurry.”

Your voice is so tired and he can hear the pain in your voice.

“How come?”

“I can actually find you,” you pause, “you make me feel safe.”

  You look at him, your eyes glassy with shock. You smile brightly at him and he smiles brightly back at you. He never thought anyone would associate him with protection, safety. Your words echo in his brain.

You’re make me feel safe.

You go to say something again before you look at him with wide, scared eyes and promptly lose consciousness. The scream that comes out of his mouth is foreign to his own ears. It sounds fearful, angry- heartbroken. Astarion tries to shake you awake, yelling your name over and over.

 “Please wake up Darling- you’re safe,” he whispers through choked sobs, “come back to me please.” 

Nothing. He can barely tell if you are breathing still as your heart thuds softly in your chest. He calls for Shadowheart two, three, four more times.

"Please," he whimpers, "I don't want to have to be without you forever- I can't be."

  The weight of his words hits him like a train- his plan had well and truly failed. Under normal, non- life threatening emergency situations, he would probably panic about the strength of his emotions. Instead, he sits here begging for the chance to be able to tell you how he really feels. He wants to move so badly, to drag Shadowheart over here to heal you, but he can't bare to leave you in your vulnerable state. He keeps calling for Shadowheart- his voice begins to crack.

Astarion feels the worst of his anxieties vanish as you suddenly start taking long, ragged, tired breaths. He grabs a healing potion out of his pocket and tilts your head as he pours it into your mouth. You swallow the fluid gingerly. Your eyes are barely open when he hears you communicate through the tadpole.

Thank you for saving me. Again.

Astarion slowly strokes the side of your face, brushing the flyaway hairs out of your eyes.

"I saved you for my own selfish reasons," he whispers, while taking your right hand gently, "close your eyes and rest- I will keep you safe. Shadowheart is coming."

You nod lazily before closing your eyes, your hand in his still. Astarion sighs in relief when your breathing gets stronger, but he is no healer. Where the hells is that damn Cleric!?

 “Shadowheart!!!!”

#baldurs gate 3 #astarion #astarion x reader #baldurs gate astarion #astarion romance #astarion x tav #bg3 spoilers #astarion x you #bg3 #karlach #smut #shameless smut actually #astarion acunin #bg3 tav

[iced-nct]

Greedy NJM

Pairing: CFO Na Jaemin x F Reader Word Count: 4.5k Warnings: Suggestive, occasional swear, jealous Jaemin Synopsis: Jaemin knew the second you walked into his office to interview for a sales role that he needed to hire you. Incredibly well spoken and driven, you reminded him a lot of himself in some ways. Except he didn’t want you for a sales position. Oh no. He wanted you as his personal assistant. Promptly after meeting with you, he let go of his current assistant to hire you for it instead. If Jaemin is going to be stuck at his desk for ten hours a day, he’ll be damned if he doesn’t have a pretty thing to stare at just outside his door. Maybe you’ll be able to tame the infamous office playboy. 

a/n: just casually dipping in to drop a 4.5k Jaemin Apply Within fic that I have been working on for like years lmfao. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy! I promise I'm going to be more active with my fics again!!!

Jaemin’s secretary blinked slowly at him, as if to process what she had just heard. “You are… firing me? Did I do something?” 

“No, I just needed a change of scenery! And I’m not firing you, I am just relocating you to a different department” He chirped in response, his voice cheerful though his eyes were dark and expression firm.

Jaemin turned his back to her to head into his corner office, “oh. One more thing.” He turned, one palm pressed firmly against the door frame as he leaned back. “I need all your things moved by tonight. My new secretary starts tomorrow morning” He winked before slamming his door closed.

-

Today could not have been off to a worse start. First there was the hole in your favorite pair of stockings, then your coffee machine decided to have a meltdown, and finally you had missed the bus that would allow you extra time to grab coffee on the way to the office. As far as first day’s go, this was not your best. Having to settle for a pair of plain sheer black tights to wear under your skirt and ordering a taxi, knowing full well the extra money was well worth having time to grab a cup of coffee. You hurried out the door, laptop bag and purse in hand, just hoping as you hustled into the back of the cab that the day wouldn’t get any worse.

The line at the coffee shop was surprisingly not horrendous, it only took about 10 minutes before you were holding your iced coffee and making your way through the entrance to Neo Dream. Jaemin’s office was on the 20th floor, you remembered this from your interview. As you moved to get off on your floor a solid chest made contact with your cup, spilling coffee all down the front of yourself and the stark white dress shirt in front of you. 

“I am so sorry! I was in such a rush, I should have paid better attention” You rambled, hoping that this stranger wouldn’t chew you out for such an accident.

“Miss Y/n?” You looked up to see Jaemin smiling down at you. “First day jitters?” He asked, a playful tone in his voice.

Your cheeks flushed with heat, “I am very sorry Mr. Na. I will clean this up right away” 

“Don’t bother, I will call the janitorial staff to clean up. We should get started with your tour, after we get changed” He tilted his head, indicating for you to follow.

The view from Jaemin’s office was stunning to say the least, the sun was almost up now but you could imagine the sunrises and sunsets that could be viewed from these windows.

“Yes, the view is lovely isn’t it?” You turned to find Jaemin, a sliver of his chest just barely exposed to you as he buttoned up a black dress shirt. “I apologize, I seem to have run out of women’s blouses, but I do have a knit sweater that may work” he jested while handing you a gray wool sweater. 

It was clearly men’s, but this would have to make do for today. Just as you were about to slip the sweater on over your stained blouse a hand stopped you. 

“If we don’t send these off to the drycleaners, the stain will set and ruin your shirt. I can’t have that, and I don’t want you to either. Just wear the sweater and I’ll send your shirt off with mine” His smile was charming, almost knee weakening. 

“Oh okay… but is there somewhere else for me to change?” Your head tilted in question.

Jaemin’s eyes widened with realization “Yes, oh gosh I’m sorry, I will turn around. You let me know when you’re decent”

You turned your back to him and began unbuttoning the shirt. Unbeknownst to you, Jaemin could make out the reflection of your chest in the window beside him. Not much could be seen, but the way the black lace of your bra held you had him wishing you allowed him to watch. Just as Jaemin’s dress pants started to get a little too tight for his liking, you cleared your throat, snapping him back from his thoughts.

“Thank you for the sweater! What should I get started with today?” You asked, whilst handing over your stained shirt. 

“You can get started on unpacking your desk and setting yourself up. I have some afternoon meetings that I will be in today, so I doubt we will see eachother very much. Just answer the phone if it rings and book in meetings for this week” You nodded at the instructions and headed out, closing the door behind you.

You paused to lean on it, breathing slowly as the picture of that small sliver of Jaemin’s defined chest floated around in your head. In the office behind you, your boss sat down at his desk, taking all the effort in the world to not call you back in to help him deal with the situation beneath his desk right now.

-

Days had turned into weeks, and though nothing of note had happened after that first eventful morning. You had settled in wonderfully, making friends with people on the finance floor, accompanying Jaemin to the occasional meeting to take notes for him when he didn’t feel like it, and canceling meetings he had with Mark just because it was funny to watch them squabble. There was lots of extra chatter throughout the office as everyone buzzed with excitement for the first annual company gala. A newer finance colleague had asked you to the gala a few days ago, and you had gladly accepted, assuming that it was a friendly gesture from one newbie to another. Excitement filled your chest as you thought about how much fun it would be to attend this company gala. The excitement was cut short however, when the door to Jaemin’s office swung open. Your boss stood there staring daggers at you, dread rushed in as you mentally went through every file you placed on his desk today, every meeting you had booked. What could you have possibly done wrong?

“Y/n. Come in here please.” Jaemin’s voice was deadly cold as he strode back towards his desk.

You slinked in, he gestured for you to close the door. “Did I do something wrong?” You asked, hesitating to turn around to face him.

“Have a seat, we’ll talk about it” He nodded to the chair in front of his desk for you to sit.

Despite sitting, the load on your shoulders felt ten times heavier under Jaemin’s stare. He slid a small pink envelope across the desk to you, your name scrawled in ink on the front. 

“What is this?” He tapped the envelope with his middle finger.

“I’m not sure, I haven’t seen that before” You answered, and truthfully you hadn’t seen it before.

“It was in the files you brought me this morning, just tucked between some reports. Imagine my surprise when I opened it and found out my trusted secretary is having an office romance with one of my junior finance employees” the smile that hung on Jaemin’s lips did not reach his eyes. 

Your eyes widened “office romance? No no you’ve misunderstood. He just asked me to the gala last week, that's all. I have no idea what the letter is and I- wait. You opened it?” 

The smile faded as he processed your words. Oh Jaemin would not have his secretary on the arm of anyone other than him, and he would make sure of that. Despite the other women around the office, who Jaemin had been making his way through, you managed to get under his skin in all the right ways.

“Sorry, I thought you knew” He started, propping his head up on his hands “secretaries are required to escort their managers to the gala. Mark’s rules” Jaemin grinned lazily.

“Oh! So I’ll still be working, right?” you thought about all the extra things you would need to prepare in this case, starting with a much bigger clutch to keep all Jaemin’s business cards in.

Jaemin smirked, “That’s correct Y/n. You have to be by my side all night. Make sure you let me know the color of your dress so I can plan my tie accordingly”

You nodded, your boss’ phone began to ring echoing throughout his large office. “I’ll bring you a swatch tomorrow morning” You spoke softly as you stood to leave the room.

Jaemin only nodded in response before picking up the phone “Mark!! How goes it over in-” His sentence cut off as the door shut behind you.

“What an odd day” you pondered while sifting through the hundreds of emails in your inbox. Mark had taken the liberty to have Haechan set up all Jaemin’s emails to duplicate so you had copies of important things as well. Unfortunately this also meant you got to see all the emails that lovestruck employees sent him without knowing you could see the confessions as well. After deleting what must have been the 20th email love note, you came across a thread that caught your eye. The email was from another female employee, detailing things she and Jaemin had done the previous night. From the sounds of it, you weren’t the only one engaging in an alleged “office romance”. There were quite a few more like that email, all talking about how they loved it when Jaemin did that “thing”. You weren’t sure what the “thing” was, but from the way he had these ladies begging for him via email correspondence you couldn’t help but be curious. It didn’t help that some had described certain acts in such detail, it was only natural that your head drifted away from work causing you to think about Jaemin’s head between your-

The thought was cut short by a loud thud from the elevator. Upon inspection you could see the finance junior who asked you to the gala had dropped a box of their belongings on the floor. The security guard who was with them helped gather their belongings back into the supply box before giving them a reassuring pat on the shoulder. You thought about going over to ask what happened, but a ping from your inbox beat you to it. ‘I WAS WRONGLY FIRED BY NA JAEMIN” was the subject line, there was no body to the email. Just that one subject line that left chills down your spine. You glanced to your boss’ door then back to your computer screen, the email was sent to everyone on the finance floor. It wasn’t long before chatter began amongst your colleagues on the floor. Everyone was curious to know about their former colleague scorned, making incredibly obvious passes by the now barren desk that once housed the junior finance employee. Jaemin seemed unbothered by the office bustle, opting to send you a teams chat asking for you to accompany him out of the office for his suit fitting for the gala. 

-

The interior of the store was full of mannequins decked out in name brand clothing that had your bank account near tears. Though you were only here to keep an eye on Jaemin’s emails and schedule for the day, he kept asking for your input on the suits he chose. The swatch you had at home would have to wait for another day, though he assured you it would be no hassle to have a tie ordered into the office in the correct color. 

“Well? Does this make me seem intimidating enough?” He turned his head over his shoulder to ask you. 

There was simply no denying the fact that Jaemin WORE the clothes, they did not wear him. He looked stunning in everything, so much so that you kept catching your mind slipping off to imagine the things he could do in the dressing room. Your eyes must’ve lingered for too long without speaking, as Jaemin chuffed a laugh. 

“I’m so sorry, yes it looks great!” you smile warmly at him, just as another ping comes through on his work phone. An email from Mark asking about the firing of the finance colleague and why he is now receiving multiple emails from the distressed former employee.

Jaemin cocks his head, one brow raised in question “Something the matter?”

You lock the phone quickly and look up at where he stands on the pedestal for his fitting. “Just Mark asking about an employee who was fired earlier, apparently he is now receiving emails stating that he was wrongfully terminated.” You stare, waiting for a reaction from him that never comes. 

“Ah yes, he was fraternizing with other employees. Can’t have my department become a cesspool now, can I?” His answer is cold as ice, his face revealing no indication of what he is thinking.

You can’t help but laugh at his reference, as if he hadn’t been sleeping with multiple employees from different departments. “What seems to be so funny, Y/n?” 

“Oh, nothing. Just your cesspool reference was funny” You roll your eyes, not expecting him to continue prodding. But he does just that.

“And why, pray tell, is it funny? Is my finance department a joke to you?” His eyes narrow, the shop steward who was pinning the suit even stops momentarily to give you a glance.

You need a moment to collect your thoughts. To try and decide just where you should begin with this. “You know Haechan set up my email so that I get duplicates of all the emails sent to you, right?” 

Jaemin nods thoughtfully, before his eyes widen in realization. “You get all my emails?” 

You bob your head “every single one of them. Mark insisted it was set up that way so you can never say you just missed a meeting invite in your swaths of emails.”

He pinches the bridge of his nose, eyes closed in frustration. “Y/n, what have you been seeing?” his foot tapping against the stained wood of the pedestal.

“Just the usual. Multiple emails from Mark about meetings, Renjun sending gala updates, Haechan providing timelines for software updates, Jeno sending memes that he has made instead of marketing campaigns, Jisung sending you meeting schedules with investors for the week, Chenle sending selfies mostly.” You shrug, pleased with your answer. 

“That’s it? Nothing else?” His tone is tense and his eyes are fixed on you, gluing you to the spot on the bench.

“Finance employees sending you updated reports too. Oh! And just the casual love confession, or excruciatingly detailed emails from your lovers” You smirk at him.

“I see.” Jaemin steps down, shooing the shop steward away as he strides towards you, “and tell me, Y/n. Do you read all of those excruciatingly detailed emails?” He leans down slightly, your faces mere inches apart.

You wet your lips, noticing Jaemin’s eyes flick down to your mouth before coming back up to meet your gaze. “Yes.”

He straightens back to his full height, now towering over where you sat. “Interesting indeed” he mutters before turning back to the shop employee to continue with his fitting.

-

The next morning you had a large iced americano sitting on the edge of your desk for your boss, along with the fabric swatch. It was odd, seldom did you beat Jaemin to the office. But today you felt extra jittery, especially after how hot his eyes had felt on you yesterday during his fitting. In fact, it was a shock that you managed to get a few hours of sleep. You had tossed and turned all night, thoughts of Jaemin taking you in the dressing room after your conversation had taken your mind hostage. A few times throughout the night you had awoken in a cold sweat, finally deciding to just get up at 5am instead of trying to get a few more hours of rest. That was how you ended up at your desk at 6:30, a large cup of tea clutched in your hands as you sifted through more meeting invites and emails. 

“Good morning Y/n. You’re awfully early.” Jaemin smiled warmly, a glint of something else shone in his eyes.

You gestured lazily to the cup of coffee on the edge of your desk “That’s for you, the swatch too”

His smile dropped as he stared at the coffee and the swatch “your dress is red?”

“Yes” you nodded before adding “I hope that’s alright”

“That will be just fine, I just so happen to have a tie that I think is the same color.” Jaemin fixed a tight smile before heading into his office and closing the door.

A few hours later a gorgeous intern from accounting came by, stopping at your desk “I have an appointment with Mr. Na” She smiled.

“Sure, just a moment” you returned her smile while getting up to knock on your boss’ door. 

“Send her in.” Jaemin said through the thick oak door before you could even let him know his one o’clock was here. 

-

She left an hour later, hair messier than it was when she arrived and her stockings had noticeable runs down both legs. All you could do was cock a brow as she breezed past with her blush stained cheeks. ‘I’m sure I’ll get an email about that later’ you thought, mentally rolling your eyes. Moments later your boss appeared at his door, fixing his tie nonchalantly. 

“Y/n, take the rest of the day off before the gala tonight. I’ll pick you up at 7 tonight, alright?” His voice was cold and detached, much like it had been at the store.

“Sure, thank you. I will see you then” It was no use putting up a fight. And it was certainly no use to ask him what had been on the tip of your tongue since yesterday. All you wanted was to know why that employee had been fired, and if their claim had any merit.

-

True to his word, Jaemin arrived at 7 on the dot. A swanky black car pulled up outside, the driver meeting you by the door for you to get in. After the door was shut you noticed Jaemin’s eyes fixated on you, suddenly the tight red dress you opted for felt all too revealing. 

He licked his lips slowly before speaking “I get the feeling there’s something you want to ask me, Y/n?”

“Why did you fire that employee that asked me out and gave me that letter?” You asked, Jaemin just stared at you in shock, clearly not expecting that to be the question.

“I- well. He had falsified a few reports so I was going to let him go anyway, but…” He trailed off, turning to look out the window instead of at you. “I thought you were going to ask about the escort from earlier” 

You nearly choked on your own breath “Escort? I thought she was from accounting!”

Jaemin hung his head in defeat “I know, I know. I’m sorry. I was never good at processing things. Instead of thinking though the issue I jumped straight to numbness, and I apologize” 

You simply could not believe your ears, you had figured that’s what was going on. But somehow it still took you by surprise. “Wait, why are you telling me all this?” you couldn’t help but ask.

“When I interviewed you for that sales role, I had such bad thoughts. I decided to tell you I needed an assistant instead. But I had one already. I fired her to give you the role. I just wanted that pretty little ass outside my office. I wanted to rub it in everyone’s faces that I had the hottest secretary. But then you got that letter, and I noticed you starting to get a little too much attention than I liked. And I didn’t expect to like you this much and-” He rambled on before stopping abruptly to look at you. 

Tears welled in your eyes, threatening to fall “two people lost their jobs because of me?” Your voice felt raw.

“Technically only one, the other guy was getting fired for fraud anyway. It was just a coincidence. And I didn’t fire my former secretary, I relocated her to another department. That was poor phrasing on my end” Jaemin reached for your hands, you foolishly let him hold on.

This was an enormous pill to swallow. “So let me get this straight.” You squeezed Jaemin’s hands. “You removed your secretary, hired me because you think I’m hot, got jealous when I was getting attention, forced me to be your date for this gala, and then hired an escort to take out your frustrations instead of just coming clean and talking to me?”

“That’s about it, yeah” Jaemin nodded enthusiastically.

“I quit.” You pulled your hands back to your lap.

Jaemin’s smile fell, his eyes showing the panic he was feeling. “No, no you can’t quit. Who’s going to read my emails to me and copy down all the meeting notes that I don’t feel like doing?”

You shrugged “I’m not sure, Jaemin. I just know it won’t be me.” 

The timing was lovely as the car had pulled up to the venue, the driver was already opening the door to help you out. Jaemin clutched your hand desperately. “Please, Y/n. Please just give me the night to make things right.”

You brushed him off “I will accompany you tonight, but tomorrow morning I will be packing my things. I’m sorry”

Jaemin led the way into the gala, his shoulders slumped in defeat. To anyone else, you were sure he looked angry, but you knew the truth. The first hour of the gala was spent greeting fellow colleagues and investors. You stopped to chat with Renjun, praising him for how incredible the party turned out, to which he agreed with a small smile and flushed cheeks. 

“He’s into the party planner he hired” Jaemin leaned down to whisper in your ear.

The sudden closeness took you by surprise, but you couldn’t help but slightly lean back into his chest. The countless champagne flutes did not help the situation, no matter how much you wanted to not be around Jaemin right now, your other desires had taken over. Jaemin’s hand was placed firmly on your hip, holding you in place. 

“I think it’s time we get you home sweetheart” He spoke softly, looking around to find the nearest exit.

You could only nod, agreeing that it was in fact time to head home. Jaemin kept his grip on your hip as he escorted you through the crowds of people, stopping only once to whisper something to Mark before continuing to the exit. Just as it had been when you arrived, Jaemin’s car and driver were stationed out front. The car door was already open for you two to get in, he helped you into the car and you slumped against him.

-

Sun had streamed in through the large windows of your bedroom bright and early. You cursed yourself for not remembering to shut the curtains before getting into bed last night. Wait, you didn’t have curtains, or the luxurious silk bedding, or a king sized bed. Realization hit you, Jaemin must’ve taken you home. But when you looked over to the other side of the bed you found it still untouched. You were thankfully still in your dress from last night.

After gathering up some courage and taking the Advil that was conveniently left on the nightstand you took off down the hallway of the apartment. On the couch you found your boss, drinking a cup of coffee while leisurely flipping through reports.

“Good morning sleepy girl” He cooed at you.

You squinted back at him “lest you not forget, I quit last night. And you upset me.”

“I recall. I also recall you chirping at me in the car that you wanted me to bring you here and ‘do the things from the emails’ to you” He chuckled, blush crept across your cheeks. 

“I am very sorry. I will head out now.” You started towards the door.

“Y/n. Wait.” Jaemin rose from his place on the sofa, his long strides reaching you quickly. “Now that it’s not a conflict of interest, I was wondering if you would allow me to take you on a date?”

You stared at him, dumbfounded. “A date? Jaemin, you only hired me because you thought I was hot! I’m so pissed off at you! I thought I had merit, I thought I was good at my job!” You were stopped short by Jaemin’s lips on yours.

The kiss seemed to have surprised you both. Both of you stood in shock, just staring at each other. 

“You are” His voice was soft.

“I am what?” Your brows furrowed.

“Good at your job. Mark requested we send you off to another department that needs a manager. I said no, because I need you to keep me organized. I have never made it to so many meetings!” He grinned at you, placing his hands on your shoulders.

“Could I move to a different department to be a manager?” Your head tilted in question.

Jaemin breathed a sigh of relief “Yes, you absolutely can. I can always bring back my old secretary in your place”

“Then I will.” You beamed happily.

“You will what? Move departments?” Jaemin’s hands squeezed your shoulders in anticipation.

“Well yes obviously.” you rolled your eyes. “But also, I’ll let you take me out.”

Jaemin pulled you into another kiss, this one much less abrupt than the last. His lips were soft against yours, and his hands worked their way down your body. Your fingers combed through his hair, stopping occasionally to tug slightly. 

“Oh we have to stop. I still think about your first day when you had to change in my office.” He confessed.

You smirked at him, “That’s alright. I think about it too.”

“I’ll have the driver take you home and I’ll pick you up tonight. Wear something red again. It looks stunning on you.” He kissed you one last time before sending you off.

-

The next week was a do over of your first day, but this time as a manager for partner relations. But instead of taking an Uber, you arrived with the CFO in his personal car. 

“I’ll see you after work sweetheart. Let me know if I need to fire anyone for you” Jaemin winked before placing a kiss on your lips before exiting the elevator onto the finance floor. 

“Ugh, you are so lucky” another employee in the office wined before exiting at the next stop.

The doors closed, leaving you alone in the elevator. The biggest grin plastered across your face as you thought aloud “Yeah, I am pretty lucky, aren’t I?”

#nct dream #nct #nct dream imagines #nct imagines #nct drabbles #nct dream smut #nct fanfic #nct jaemin #jaemin #jaemin angst

[danisbrainrot]

tell your boyfriend

natalie scatorccio x reader

warnings: cheating (sorry not sorry, travis), reader being a shitty person, angst

ever since I found out this song was actually about a woman, I don't know why, but I immediately thought of nat. I can't explain it LMFAO.

it had been weeks since the plane crashed, and the team was condemned to suffering in the wilderness. it was lucky lottie had found the cabin in the first place, but as you swung the axe high in the air, before bringing it down with a resounding crack, you started to wonder if life would've been better if you died in the crash.

you were starving, delirious and weak. there was no sign of a rescue team—who knows how long you'd have to spend out here. watching natalie and travis walking back, hand in hand, you felt yourself growl quietly to yourself. it wasn't fair that travis, who'd never talked to nat before the crash was dating her, but you—who'd loved her for years—were forced to watch from arms length. the sight wasn't made any better when you noticed the absence of meat.

everyone was teasing the two of them, causing you to storm off into the forest. you couldn't help but find everything unfair. falling for a girl who liked a boy—knowing if you were a boy, she'd love you.

kicking over a pile of leaves, you took out your anger on the forest. you hadn't even noticed natalie, until you almost pegged a rock at her (you'd meant to get the log). "oh my god, I'm sorry nat," you exclaimed, running towards her to see if she was okay.

she snorts, moving closer to you. "feeling hangry?" she teased, taking a seat on the log you were aiming at previously. you sarcastically laugh in response, taking a seat next to her.

"joke all you want, if you spent less time fucking travis and more time looking for animals, I wouldn't be destroying the forest," you snap, feeling your stomach begin growling. nat's eyebrow raised teasingly, eyes pointed at your tummy. it's timing was uncanny.

"we're not fucking," natalie replied, making your heart race in excitement. "I mean, I'd like to. . . but he can't get it up."

knowing this was your chance, you took advantage of this information. "maybe he's gay?" you reply, trying to sound as earnest as you can. you nudge her side, "no straight man could resist you," you wink at her teasingly, receiving a soft shove to your shoulder.

"I've always trusted your gaydar. . . but I don't think this is it," she mumbles in response, leaning forward and placing her chin in her hands.

there was a beat of silence, as you desperately try to come up with a plausible explanation to break them up. "you could always ask coach, I'm sure he'd know all about gays," you joke.

nat turned her head slightly to face you, "you're right. maybe I should—" your heart sank, realising that she was seriously thinking about it.

"have you thought that maybe he's interested in someone else? and you're just a distraction," you blurted out, wishing you could take it back immediately.

nat scoffed, standing up, "yeah, thanks. that makes me feel fucking fantastic," she snapped, stomping away.

"nat! I'm sorry!" you called out, but she ignored you.

«—(♥)—»

later that night, you found yourself in the storage room, with your stomach growling. you knew that mari was hiding some berries in here and you were so hungry that you no longer cared about stealing.

the sound of creaking behind you made you jump in fright, whipping around to let out some excuse when you realised it was just natalie. "oh, I thought you were mari," you mumble, turning back to continue your quest.

"looking for her secret stash?" she asked, you tried to work out if her tone was curious or teasing. "it's behind the box there."

when she pointed in the direction, you side eyed her, wondering how he knew where it was. glad that she'd shown you, you decided not to ask. you pulled out a large white bucket and hungrily opened the lid, only to be disappointed at the contents. "she's letting them ferment?"

you turn to face natalie, who shrugs, "it's not that bad. it's pretty strong though, just made purely out of berries, makes you get drunk quicker," she explains; you snort at her, shaking your head.

"you'd have a lot of experience with being drunk," you snipe.

"hilarious, you know you're so funny, you should think about joining snl," she replied sarcastically, crossing her arms over her chest.

you sighed, putting your head in your hands. "I'm so hungry, nat. I can't keep living like this," you whisper, on the verge of tears.

natalie sits down next to you, placing a hand on your thigh. "it'll be okay, I promise. travis and I are heading to a new place tomorrow, we'll find deer there, I'm sure," she soothes. you lay your head on her shoulder, playing with her hand on your thigh.

"a new place to hunt? or a new place to fuck?" you snapped.

narrowing her eyes at you, she scoffed and got up, "you know, I liked that you weren't like the others, that you never slutshamed me. . . I guess you're just like the rest of them," she replied, leaving you alone.

you knew it was stupid to take your unrequited feelings out on her, especially because she didn't owe you romantic love. however, it killed you watching her fall in love with travis—and the hunger eating you away wasn't making you a nicer person either.

tentatively scooping some of the berry juice in your hand, sipping it, when you heard mari approaching. in a panic, you'd never put something away so quickly.

«—(♥)—»

natalie trudged through the forest with travis in defeat; the gun slung over her shoulder serving as a reminder of her duty as hunter—a duty she was failing. their eyes were still peeled for any deer, hopeful for any last minute catches. however, it seemed like all the animals in the forest knew about their plans.

groaning, nat put her head in her hands and sat on the log. "this is fucking stupid," she grumbles, ignoring travis as he took a seat next to her.

"maybe we should stay put here, just for a little while," he suggests, his thigh brushing against hers. nat rested her chin against her knees and offered him a weak smile.

neither of them noticed you, hiding in the bushes, having given up scavenging for berries. they'd been gone for three hours, leaving everyone else in the cabin to search for food—and for what? it seemed no one would be eating anything. . . meat or fruit. the disappointing view of just the two of them made your stomach growl, reminding you of how long you've gone without eating something substantial.

stepping on a twig accidentally, you winced as both their heads snap in your direction. "you're following us now? disappointed to see we aren't having sex?" natalie sniped, getting up and walking towards you.

showing off your basket, you know that she wouldn't believe you even if it's true. "just hunting for berries, figured they were further out than usual," you mumble, taking a step back the closer she got.

it wasn't until you were both face to face, your chest heaving and trying to look tough, that natalie smirked. "I get it, you're hungry, but you don't have to follow us," she teased.

you rolled your eyes, "travis, can you give us a moment?" you asked, your heart racing as you come to terms with what you're about to do.

travis scoffs, looking at nat for confirmation, who only gestured for him to return to the cabin. in shock, he sent her an odd look, before standing up, and walking away silently.

natalie turned to face you again, "what did you want to talk about?"

"i wanted to apologise. you're right, I shouldn't be slutshaming you because I'm hungry. . ." you pause, wondering whether or not you should continue. desperate to tell her about your feelings, you could feel your heartbeat raising impossibly fast. "it's actually so stupid—the real reason I was mad at you."

natalie raised her eyebrows teasingly, placing her hands on her waist and smirking at you. "let me guess, the real reason is that you like me?" you stare at her stunned, "please, you don't think I know? I'm not Jackie," she laughs. you feel a blush coming across your cheeks.

sliding her thumb through your jean loops, nat pulled you closer to her, until your chest was pressed against hers. "how'd you find out?" you whisper, looking up at her in awe.

"because I may or may not feel the same about you," she mumbles, her lips inches from yours.

"what about travis?" you ask; nat shrugs in response, finally pressing her lips against yours. initially, you freeze, not kissing her back, until she gripped your waist firmly, holding you in place, encouraging you to kiss her back passionately.

wrapping your hands around her neck, natalie pulls away for a second, "I should probably tell my boyfriend," she whispers. you raise your eyebrows in shock.

"tell him what? that I'm your girlfriend now?" you teased, eliciting laughter from the blonde. she nodded, before placing her fingers under your chin and pulling you in for another kiss.

#natalie scatorccio #natalie x reader #wlw #yellowjackets #fanfic #fluff #travis martinez #oneshot #inspired by #tell ur girlfriend #yellowjackets showtime #travis yellowjackets #tw: cheating #natalie scatorccio x reader

[houseoftulips]

IKEA Furniture Vs. Bakugo | K. Bakugo

feat. ~ time skip bakugo x reader

about ~ literally bakugo fighting for his life trying to put together IKEA furniture because most of us understand how painful it can be

content warning ~ pure fluff with swearing, any comments regarding IKEA furniture are what I've heard from my boyfriend LMFAO (he hates their furniture)

note ~ not completely proof read

There are so many reasons why you love Bakugo Katsuki...

His strong-willed personality, his ability to act on things without a second thought to save the people of Japan, his rather strong bonded love with spicy food that he's been making you build a tolerance for, and even the fact that he activates his Quirk to show off how frustrated he is.

And that last reason is nearing very quickly...

Because he feels like he's facing his biggest battle yet - him versus IKEA fucking furniture. By all the living and dead Gods, he doesn't understand how a simple drawer, desk, and bedframe could quite literally test his patience. He's never heard of IKEA till he met you because your previous apartment was invested with their furniture. But what he did understand is how cheap it is compared to other stores/brands.

So, when you guys bought your first apartment together, he didn't care about where the furniture came from because it's just fucking furniture. That's all you hear from him for the past two hours is him muttering "it's just fucking furniture. why is it so hard??"

He genuinely could not put together a simple bedframe. Earlier he barely put the drawer and desk together but god fucking forbid this bed frame just had to be the one you picked to be his villain for the day.

You try to hold in your giggles as you watch him get pushed to the end of the rather annoying cliff of white wood that wouldn't screw together. "Babe," you smile as you bite your bottom lip to stop your laughs, "Let me-"

"Like hell, I'd let you help me, woman," he grumbled with both of his eyes twitching in growing anger. "How in the living hell did you put this together??"

"I had help from my dad and I hired the IKEA delivers guys to put together the bigger furniture," you smile as you sit next to him on the floor. You kissed his shoulder as you hear him grumble incoherent words that made your sweet laugh slip from your lips. "Suki, just take a break," you cooed to him.

"Fuck no,' he said straight out, "I'm getting this stupid shit done. Like I'd ever let some pieces of wood stop me from doing shit!"

You sighed with a smile hearing his excessive curse words - which is another reason why you love him.

Then another two hours have gone by and he has yet to come out of your shared bedroom with a finished bed frame. More than every-so-often, you'd hear an aggressive toss of the wood pieces being thrown god knows where or him cussing out the screw locks not fitting in the hole.

"Stupid piece of fake metal!"

"Stupid fucking fake wood!"

"Damn instructions not makin' any sense!"

"Fuckin' screw! Where the fuck did you go this time?!"

"Damn Swedes makin' shit harder than it needs to be"

You were in the kitchen putting a snack together for him to see if it'll calm him down but lo-and-behold you hear his iconic loud and ruling voice from down the hall.

"YOU FUCKING PIECE OF USELESS SCREW!! WHY WON'T YOU JUST GO IN??" he yells, threatening to shake off the pictures from the walls. "THIS STUPID ASS SWEDISH FURNITURE!!" he yells out again.

Then you hear it. His frustration explosion goes off in the house. You sigh with a smile because you genuinely think it's funny to get a reaction out of him from pieces of wood. You slowly walk over to the bedroom and see him laying on the floor like a starfish with the once less than half-done bed frame in smithereens.

Upon hearing your footsteps Bakugo beats you from saying anything, "Those Swedes were askin' for trouble," he mumbles.

You laugh and plop yourself on his stomach which he is quick to hold onto your thigh with his calloused and warm hands. "You're being dramatic," you giggle making him scowl at you, "Now we have to get-"

"Fuck no," he interrupts, "No, we are not getting another Swedish fucking furniture ever again. We'll just have to sleep only on the mattress for the rest of our lives."

"Noooo," you complain playfully, "Just hire the delivery guys to put it together."

"I'd rather do that shit all over again than let some random extras do it for me," he says back before letting out an overdramatic sigh, "Fucking fine. Let's go back for another one."

"Yay!" you cheer as he wraps his arms around you and effortlessly gets up from the ground with you tangled in his body.

"But that's it. We're not gonna get anythin' else," he says as he walks towards to front door, "And no fake plants either!"

You pout as you pull away slightly to look at his face. "Why," you drag out.

Bakugo steals a kiss from you and smiles softly as he looks at you. "Because they're not fucking real," he mumbles against your lips.

"Whatever," you pout, "But if I find another piece of furniture we're getting it."

"Over my dead body that I'd let fucking IKEA get the best of me again!"

I'm thinking of making this a series with other anime characters or just MHA men

#my hero acedamia #mha katsuki #mha fluff #bnha bakugo katsuki #bakugo katuski #katsuki bakugo mha #bakugou x y/n #bakugou x reader #anime fanfic #anime characters #katsuki bakugō #katsuki #kacchan #katsuki bakugo #katsukibakugou #my hero academia #bakugo headcanons #mha headcanons #bnha headcannons #pro hero dynamight #pro hero dynamite #pro hero au #bnha eijiro kirishima #mina ashido #pro hero shouto #pro hero izuku #boku no hero academia #bnha #mha #kacchan x reader

[roronoaswifey]

𝐁𝐄𝐒𝐓 𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐒.

summary. your feelings and thoughts are all over the place when your best friend suddenly reappears in your life after having disappeared months ago.

pairing. portgas d. ace x gn!reader

warnings/tags. angst, implied past sex, best friends to strangers to lovers, ace is kinda a slut but we been knew, reader is yet again jealous, reader has hair, kinda ooc ace

wc. 4.3k

kazu’s note. listened to best friend by the weeknd and his toxic ass had me thinking… half of these lyrics are from the song LMFAO

you hadn’t seen that freckled face in months.

his pearly whites, grinning boyishly, the oh so familiar mischievous glint in his eyes. he screamed trouble wherever he went. whether it was sending flames into pirates who asked for problems, whether it was a clumsy mistake in which ended in you sprawled beneath him, bulky arms trapping you, moans and cries slipping into the moonlit night.

“you…” you trailed off, mug filled with booze nearly slipping from your loosen grip.

no matter where he went, he radiated a charm so intoxicating, so daring. was it the confidence in his steps? was it the way he always held his chin up, pink lips stretching into that infamous smirk? whatever the reason was, he always managed to have you folding every single resolve you had built in the first place.

“missed me, best friend?”

you nearly scoffed at his audacity. that’s what it was. even if he was annoyingly attractive and had an intriguing personality, one thing the man had was the nerve.

“fuck off, ace,” saying his name felt almost taboo. you hadn’t— or tried not to— thought of him in nearly a year. he up and left you in the worst of situations, in your most vulnerable moment, ghosting you and every responsibility he left with you, choosing against holding himself accountable and fleeing.

“is that a way to greet a bestie you haven’t seen in so long?” the raven haired slipped into the seat next to yours, fingers tapping at the wooden counter, signalling the bartender to come over.

you rolled your eyes, not holding back on your scoff either, “and who’s fault is that, exactly?” you heard ace chuckle lowly, and you thanked whatever god that’d been looking over you, grateful you weren’t able to see the way the corner of his lips definitely curved into that smile.

“suppose it’s mine,” he shrugged, as if he wasn’t at fault, as if hadn’t smashed and dashed you about a year ago.

when the bartender made her way towards the both of you, you weren’t surprised to see the blush draping over her cheeks so desperately, her shaky fingers wiping a previously used mug with a cloth.

“w-what could i get you, sir?” she posed nervously, eyes having a hard time to keep up with ace’s flirtatious ones.

“surprise me, love.” you visibly stifled an unimpressed laugh, focusing on finishing your drink and ignoring ace’s eyes now on you.

he looked back at the young bartender, propping an elbow on the counter and leaning his cheek into his cupped palms, “make sure it’s as sweet as you are,”

“s-sure! give me a second,” she was now steaming in blush head to toe, clumsily placing the cleaned mug onto the counter and scurrying off to mix a drink to ace’s liking.

when the bartender left his field of vision, he barked a laugh, now shifting his body so he could focus his attention back onto you. with a raised eyebrow, he spoke, “what a sweet thing, am i right?”

“what would i know?” you grumbled moodily, annoyed at both him and yourself for falling into his obvious bait. “she barely got to say anything before you started speaking with your dick.”

“is that what i was doing?” ace urged, leaning forward and you got a good whiff of his familiar scent, cursing yourself for the way your heat began throbbing at unnecessary flashbacks.

“i mean i get you’ve always been slow, but don’t try to play stupid,” you snickered, wrist moving in circular motions as you twirled the remaining of drink in your cup.

“me? slow?” ace pulled back in faux offence, slapping his hand over his bare chest dramatically. “i’m offended you’d ever say such a thing! i am no where near stupid, that’s you projecting!”

“tone it down, pretty boy,” the casual nickname, that initially began as an insult, slipped past your tongue with ease. your own eyes widened in shock for a split second, and you were certain he’d caught on.

“pretty boy, hmm,” he now entirely shifted in his seat, full body facing you. he went back to leaning his cheek in his palm, a wolffish grin decorating his pink lips, “i missed that name.”

your heart sunk at the implication. how dare he say he missed that nickname as if it was your fault he wasn’t hearing it anymore? what was the matter with this incredibly sexy idiot?

“again, who’s fucking fault is that?” you now turned your body to face him, face contorted in pure annoyance. your brows creased in the centre of your forehead, nose scrunched and lips set in a frown.

“i did say mine, i believe,” he tapped his index finger on his chin, pretending to think things through.

“why’d you leave, ace?” you finally asked, the question weighing heavily on your mind for as long as you could remember.

why’d he leave? where had he gone to? why didn’t he ever try to keep in touch with you? was it something you did? did he pick up on the feelings you were catching? was that really what drove him to leave you?

“cutting straight to the point, i see,” he chuckled, though it wasn’t his regular, flirty ones. it felt almost regretful, almost sad, but you didn’t want to think too much on it.

“i’m sorry, did you expect causal small talk after having dipped out of fucking nowhere?” you countered, jerking back and eyebrow raised in an unimpressed manner.

“maybe,” he teased, and when your frown only deepened, he laughed apologetically, hands thrown up in surrender. “alright, alright, don’t kill me now,”

“hurry ace, or else i’m leaving in the next few seconds,” you glared coldly, hoping he caught onto the double-implication of your statement.

from the way he tensed in surprise momentarily, you knew he did. good.

he let out a defeated sigh, a short smile falling on his face, “yeah, i guess that’s fair. i mean, i only did it ‘cause—”

“your drink, sir!” the bartender spawned out of the blue, a more confident aura all over. she had a bright smile, despite the evidence of her nervousness tainted on her cheeks.

you didn’t hold back the roll of your eyes. it wasn’t that you had anything against the girl. you hadn’t even cared for her even when she gave you your drink a few minutes ago. but did she have to show up when you were finally ready to hear the reasoning behind ace’s disappearance?

“thank you, sweetheart. may i ask what did you concoct here?” ace asked, definitely stalling so he would either have more time to think an answer through or drive you to leave so he wouldn’t have to answer.

much to his dismay, you were determined to hear what he had to say.

“i probably shouldn’t say, it’s the bar’s secret recipe,” she fiddled with her thumbs shyly, her blue eyes everywhere but on ace. you hated how you knew just exactly how she felt, seeing as you were once in her shoes.

you kissed your teeth under your breath, your own eyes set on your drink.

“what a bummer,” ace feigned sadness, lips falling into a pout. he suddenly switched into a happy mood, the pout fading into a cocky smirk that had both you and the bartender definitely folding. “i do enjoy surprises though.”

the bartender’s lips parted slightly, eyes shimmering in awe, “i… i hope you enjoy it. it was my first time trying it out, s-so i’m not sure if it’ll amount to your expectations but—”

“nonsense. i’m sure it’ll blow me away,” and before she could retort, he brought the mug to his lips and took gracious gulps of the mixture.

while the bartender eyed expectantly, waiting for a reaction from the freckled male, you watched from your peripheral to see what his reaction would be.

not that you didn’t know already. you knew exactly what kind of guy ace was.

ace pulled the drink away, the liquid trickling past his mouth and down his chin as he brought his hand to swipe the drink away. his lips smacked for a while, marinating the taste with precision, before a grin appeared on his face.

you rolled your eyes at his hopelessness. you knew exactly what was coming.

“this surpassed any expectation i had!” he laughed, before taking more sips of his drink as if to prove his point. he probably missed the way heart eyes jumped out of the bartender’s face.

“i-i’m glad you enjoyed it! feel free to have some more!” she brought another mug before him, placing it too excitedly on the counter.

“i’m planning on it, love,” he winked, handing her his previous empty cup in favour for the newly filled one. you only caught a glance of it, but the drink seemed to be a light pink-brownish mixture, and you did wonder what exactly was in the drink.

“although,” he leaned forward, propping himself on his elbows, eyes watching her intensely, “i really would love to hear more about this recipe,”

“i could always let you know some other time, since i am on shift right now…” she trailed off, subconsciously leaning in as well, almost in a trance at ace’s hypnotic gaze.

“yeah? you’d do that for me?” he pressed on further, loving the way you tended in annoyance at his side. you knew he knew you were pissed, and that only enraged you further. why were you always falling into his cheap games?

your hand clenched unintentionally around your mug, but the bartender was too far deep in love to even notice.

“i would.. i really would..” the bartender let her lips part, mumbling as her eyes basically beaming in joy. ace hummed, letting his eyes fall from her lips back to her gaze, and you felt your heart sink to the deepest pit of your stomach.

was he really going to do this right in front of you?

“‘m sure you would,” ace indulged, waiting to see how long it’d take for you to crack. “you are a sweetheart, after all.”

“o-only for you…” was she even realizing how ridiculous she sounded, submitting to a man she hardly knew? how unprofessional was she, to be flirting with her customers on shift? why was this bothering you so fucking much?

“you’re too cute,” ace scrunched his nose, bringing a hand up to push a loose strand of pink hair past her face and behind her ear. “has anybody told you that?”

you could throw up. you’re almost certain he used that exact line on you when you both had met for the first time. says a lot about him, you supposed.

“you’re the first,” her eyes diverted back to the counter, blood rushing quick all over her skin, and you cringed at her humbleness.

“i mean,” ace’s eyes glanced so quickly at you that you thought you were imagining things until he spoke his next words, “i could be your first of many things—”

you slammed your drink on the counter. the bartender snapped out of her daze, and ace had finally sunk back into his seat, a proud smile on his face.

fishing in your pocket, you pulled out a twenty dollar bill before flicking it to your drink, “keep the fucking change,” before wasting no time to bolt past the exit. you didn’t care anymore to hear whatever the raven haired had to say, he clearly didn’t care for how you felt at all.

making your way outside the dark sky, you let out a deep sigh, shoulders sagging in defeat as you felt your blood boil in annoyance. how could he joke about something so sensitive like that? did he find a thrill in genuinely pissing you off? you had confided the last of your innocence to the man, and for him to sneak diss you like that in public made you feel foolish.

“the nerve of that fucking bastard,” you mumbled, kicking at a pebble on the floor.

you walked further down the shore of the sea, wanting to be away as possible from the loud and smelly bar. the fresh gust of wind of the sea brought you at peace, clearing your mind from its previous tense state.

so what if ace doesn’t care for you anymore? it’s not like you gave a fuck, even if you had been locked in your room for weeks, wondering what you’d done that drove him away. even if you had called his younger brother and asked if he heard any news of the boy, that doesn’t mean you cared. and it has much less to do with the fact you found yourself weeks later craving for a sense of intimacy in strangers you met in bars, fucking them to numb the pain of your best friend leaving you.

you didn’t fucking care.

“so you were jealous, after all.”

your left brow twitched in irritation. the last person you wanted to hear, the last person you wanted in your presence just had to come after you. what was his deal? you left him alone with that goddamn bartender so he could drag her to the nearest stall and fuck her as he pleased.

so why was he here?

“fuck off, ace,” you repeated your previous words but with much more malice. “just fucking leave me alone— that’s all your best at doing anyway.”

“y/n,” he said your name for the first time tonight, and you couldn’t help the way your head whipped back at him. the way your name rolled off his tongue so easily made you realize you missed him more than you’d like to admit.

shit.

“thought you were gonna give me a chance at explaining myself?” he dared to ask you, and for what felt like the nth time this night, you rolled your eyes at him.

“well that was before you decided to strip the bartender with your eyes,” you countered, your stomach churning with uneasinesses at the thought of it.

ace, however, shrugged helplessly, “it was just to rile you up. you know how much i love to piss you off,” and yes, you were painfully aware of the fact. it still didn’t change the fact you knew and still felt a twinge— more like twinges— of jealousy. you were an idiot, a jealous idiot.

“doesn’t change anything,” you turned back around, feeling yourself crumble at the soft gaze he gave you, like the manipulative bastard he was, because there was no other logical explanation for it.

“guess not.” he concluded, and a silence fell between you both. you slightly regretted having turned around since you now couldn’t read his expression or know how he was feeling. though, ace was always unreadable.

the stars that lit in the moonlight painfully reminded you of multiple nights you’d spent on the roof of a house, in the middle of a field or even a random ship on sea, and how you’d always been coddled in warm arms, chattering away about absolute nonsense, soft kisses shared that even led to mind-blowing sex.

how many other people had he shared the same experiences with? how many other people had he cuddled, sexed up and left just as hopeless as you were? did you really not matter to him at all?

“what we got, y/n, is secure,” ace spoke softly, and your arms found themselves crossed over your chest almost protectively. “there isn’t anything or anybody else that could ever amount to what you and me had.”

“so why’d you leave?” you whispered, hating the vulnerability laced in your tone. your arms clutched you further, “why leave if that was the case?“

“that’s just it, darling,” you heard him take a step closer and instinctively, you took one too. you wanted to keep a distance with the boy, fearing you’d do the impossible and beg him to stay.

he sighed at your actions, before continuing, “i didn’t want to be responsible for your heart, if we fell,” he bravely took another step and this time you stayed still. “things you wanted, i wasn’t looking for. i feared that if anything ever escalated, i’d get clumsy and tear your heart apart.”

you stiffened, eyes wide as you blankly stared the sea. so he did know of your feelings. he knew how you felt, and instead of turning you down gently, he decided to fucking run away? he wanted to handle it like a child instead of the adult he was?

“i loved you,” he confessed after a moment of silence. your heart sunk at the revelation. “i realized a few weeks into our relationship. but you were my best friend, and i foolishly thought we couldn’t get any closer than that.”

“so you ran off?!” you cut him off, turning around. you were fuming, how could he mess with your emotions like that? “you fuck me for months and the minute you sense a change you tuck your dick in your pants and fuck off to god knows where?”

“i thought we had arrangements,” ace tried to justify himself. when you scoffed, he sighed helplessly and ran his fingers through his hair, “when i realized you caught feelings too, i got scared, terrified even. i thought you weren’t like that, the type to fall for somebody like me.”

“but i did. and you stupidly decided to scurry off,” you repeated yourself, wanting your point to come across. you wanted him to realize how selfish he’d been, and how much pain he put you through. “had it ever even crossed your mind on how i would feel?”

“i never wanted to hurt you,” he whispered, stepping even closer. he was now right before you, and the way he towered over you was so comforting. “it was never my intention. i know i was being selfish, but the truth is that i feared what would happen if we had taken it further and you realized i wasn’t worth your time.”

“you can’t just go and decide things for me, ace!” you exclaimed in annoyance, and to further that annoyance, ace stayed quiet. “shit like that is up for me to decide— i would never do you dirty like that!”

“i knew that,” ace nodded, and you wanted to rip the hairs off your head. “but deep down, something was telling me the opposite. that you’d realize you had much better for you waiting past the grand line. and i didn’t want to put myself through that ache,”

“so you decided to put me through it instead.” you deadpanned, no ounce of remorse or guilt. ace bit his lip in shame, eyes momentarily diverting to the floor before he found your cold eyes again.

“i’m sorry. i’m not expecting you to forgive me, not in the slightest, but i do what you to know there wasn’t a day i wasn’t think of you, and how badly i wanted to apologize.”

“don’t give me that bullshit,” you snarled, and when you felt warm hands holding your shaky shoulders, you felt tears pooling in your eyes.

“it’s the truth,” he reassured you, thumb grazing your skin so delicately, that you bit your lip in attempt to hold back a sob. the gentle look he was giving you did nothing to help your shaken thoughts.

so, ace loved you back. was that in the past? had his feelings for you vanished? and he left you because he was scared you would realize you could do better than him. what a load of bullshit— who else knew you better inside and out than he did? who cared of his heritage, his bloodline, his reputation? he was simply ace in your eyes, not the infamous rookie fire fist ace, or portgas d. ace, son of former pirate king, gol d. roger.

just ace.

“you didn’t have to say it, but i knew you didn’t want to have sex as friends no more,” ace filled in the silence with more explanation, and you didn’t think you could stomach what else he had to say, “i could feel it in the way you’d look at me with so much love. i didn’t and still don’t think i’m worthy of holding all of it. so, in the only way i knew how, i left. i took every single feeling i had for you and ran away with them, hoping both you and i could move on,”

“i got sidetracked,” ace admitted, fingers now pushing away your hair from your shoulders behind your back, and the way your face shone from the moon’s reflection had his stomach tumbling with fondness. “the deal was initially to fool around, and the more we took it further, i focused less on our friendship and more on what could’ve been a potential relationship.”

your glistening eyes watched in anticipation, waiting for him to do anything. the way his fingertips left traces of warmth all over your skin, the way his dark eyes grazed all over your facial features, the soft smile he gave you— you wanted him to kiss you like he meant it.

“and i can’t believe how stupid i’d been. i talked things out with marco, and he made me realize i needed to come find you and settle this straight once and for all.”

settle this…? “ace, what are you implying?” you asked, hoping desperation didn’t leak through your voice. you were hoping he was implying just what you thought he was. you wanted nothing else other than him, and no amount of money or dates or dick could ever change that.

he flicked you a charming smile, “y/n, let’s try it again, but properly this time. can i be yours? if you’ll have me of course,” his left hand cupped your cheek, the pad of his thumb smoothening your soft skin.

your stomach tightened. your heart erupted in butterflies. you felt a shorten of breath, throat suddenly clogging and mouth dry. was this a joke? surely this couldn’t have been real. you’d been longing for him for so long, you were scared you were gonna wake up and realize ace was never yours in the first place.

but, at the feel of his calloused fingers caressing your cheek, brown eyes staring down at you deeply, the warmth of his body hitting you all at once with his unique scent, you knew this was far from a dream. it all felt too real.

and as ecstatic as you were, you were also an asshole. and so, for the fun of it, you brought your hand to the one resting on your face and when his face lit up you almost felt bad for what you were about to do, “i’ve already moved on, ace…”

his smile dropped, and you swear you heard his heart shatter. you held back a laugh, watching as his own eyes began to water, slowly retracting his hand from your cheek.

“ah, i see…” he trailed off awkwardly, and you wanted to stop but you needed to see how this would play out. “of course. it’s my fault anyway, so i get it.”

“yeah..” you trailed off yourself, out of words to fill in the silence. you watched as he gulped, his tongue poking the inside of his cheek out of reflex. he looked on the verge of tears and you really didn’t want to bring him that far but you wanted to push it just a little further, “i’m sorry ace, but i found somebody else.”

“o-oh,” he nodded, eyes boring to the rocky floor beneath you both. he bit his lip, eyebrows scrunching as he most likely held back his tears, “well, i wish the both of you the best—”

“oh my god ace, fuck i’m sorry, i’m joking!” you broke out of character, a laugh escaping you before you could help it. you revelled in the way he jolted in surprise, teary eyes widening and his lips parted in shock. he looked like a dumb puppy, and your chest only blossomed further with warmth.

“y/n, what the fuck?” he whined, pouting childishly as he softly shoved your shoulder. you doubled over, laughter consuming you as the taller boy continued to mumble about how he was ready to sob on the floor in seconds tops.

“i’m sorry but you deserved it,” you wiped a tear from your eye, giggling at the idea of him crying over your rejection.

“i guess… but still?!” he rolled his eyes sassily, hands resting on his hips. “i was about to fly out of here in tears, you fucking sadist!”

“my apologies, best friend,” you emphasized, leaning closer towards him, and when his arms snaked to your waist with practiced ease, you flung your arms over his neck, fingers fondling the nape of his hair.

“apology not accepted,” he complained, and you rolled your eyes playfully at his attitude. as if he had any right to deny an apology, you thought but decided to bite your tongue. “you’ll have to prove to me you’re actually sorry.”

“is there something i could do to earn your forgiveness?” you played into his game, subconsciously pushing forward, the familiarity of his eyes pulling you into a trance.

ace hummed in faux thought, his eyes flicking from your glossy lips back to your seductive gaze. his infamous smirk etched on his face, flashing his boyish grin, as his fingers massaged the flesh of your waist with delicacy.

“gimme a kiss and i’ll consider it.”

“you’ll consider it?” you giggled, and when ace sassily rolled his eyes, you nodded, pressing your chest onto his bare one. you felt the grip around your hips tighten, and you tilted your head to the side, your own lips parting.

you watched as he hypnotically leaned in, falling to your charms, and you mentally high fived yourself for being able to make the ace all dazed and blushy like a schoolgirl.

“consider it done, pretty boy.” you smiled prettily, and finally locked lips with the man your heart had yearned for months.

he’s such a slut ugh.

#roronoaswifey.exe #kazuha’s works 📂 #portgas d. ace #fire fist ace #ace x reader #portgas d ace x reader #one piece #x reader

[viharbinger]

Hi okay I have a really really cute ask So in the 3.2 trailer, it’s shows Haypasia lying down and Scara watching over her. If you don’t know, he’s doing this because she is his only follower, so he’s taking care of her/looking after her (bc she’s his ONLY follower) What I’m asking is if it’s literally just that concept, but Haypasia is replaced by us, aka, the reader. So it’s basically just Scaramouche watching over us whilst we’re lying down and then we wake up and see him and it’s all just generally cute stuffIt can be seen as platonic or romantic, I’d personally prefer romantic

pairings: scaramouche x gn!reader

warnings: hurt/comfort? Reader is a heavy sleeper lol — I wrote half of this when 3.2 archon quest was not out yet so therefore I'm writing everything blindly so this is either gonna be completely inaccurate or I just predicted the future B-)

a/n: LMFAO I find it funny af that scaramouche's only follower/worshiper is his PARTNER HAHAHA imagine having no fans 🤭

masterlists

Way before the Balladeer even became a God, you, his life partner stayed by his side the whole way. You hadn't ever renounced him after all he's done and been through but instead comforted him through it all.

You both lived in an isolated home somewhere in Inazuma's Narukami island, alone yet a long way from the city. Living like that has its advantages of course, mainly to protect yourselves against whatever meddling business the 6th fatui harbinger had gotten himself in.

Now that he's finally gotten the Raiden Shogun's electro gnosis from a certain shrine maiden, he's on foot again to archons-knows-where. And he tells you the news when you're both sitting on the porch of your tiny and cozy home.

"You're leaving already when you just got back?" Maybe it was the Gods playing favourites but the sun kissing your skin and the wind blowing against your hair certainly made you glow.

The sun was shining over the horizon, and the birds were barely awake. You were in your comfortable pyjamas and he on the other hand, was adorning his beautiful silk navy blue and white kimono that morning, rather than his usual fatui harbinger attire. Your eyes are struggling to keep open as you woke up a mere 10 minutes before.

Scaramouche brings himself closer to you as he sets his baggage down, the one that he needed to bring along as he was going to go out on yet another journey alone. He cups your hands together and brings it to his lips to give it a gentle kiss.

"It's just some unfinished business I need to take care of. I'll come back for good. I promise." He whispered, brushing the stray hair that was over your eyes. He kept his palm on your left cheek whilst rubbing his thumb under your eye gently. His touch was delicate, like as if handling you too much could break you like porcelain glass. He was almost too afraid to leave you.

Several weeks passed.

You barely heard a word from him, but you have heard such news of an eccentric wanderer roaming around the lands of Sumeru. It wasn't much to go by but alas, at least you're aware he's living and breathing.

Now after achieving the power of the gods, his mission was almost complete. The power allowed him to do all things necessary. He was about to make his next move when his ears perked up in alert; as if someone was calling for him.

He doesn't mistake it's your voice. The voice he's been trying to replay in his head for weeks. He's afraid that if he doesn't, he'll forget how you sound like, how your voice could make him feel like a bed of roses.

You were repeating his name, like you were begging him for something. His usually hardened gaze softened in guilt at the thought of you in despair of his absence. He wishes he could just teleport straight to you right then and there, but even gods have their limits.

By nightfall, Scaramouche was still adjusting to his powers. He wanted to try and do anything within his power to attempt to even be closer to you. That is, until he found himself in a dream-like state.

He felt he could move freely, almost as if he were a ghost. He prompted himself to take this to his advantage and visit you in your sleep. And there you were, cuddled up on your bed.

The home that was once cozy and sweet felt uncomfortable. The room you were in was unkept and the bed was undone, some pillows are on the floor and the blanket was dishevelled. He notices of course, that you were sleeping on his side of the bed instead of yours. And the tears that were continuously flowing from your eyes were hard not to notice.

He called out your name. You couldn't hear him. He was right next to you, within arms reach, yet you couldn't hear or even see him.

The puppet wasted no time in at least trying to comfort you. He kneeled down besides you and pushed the hair sticking to your face from the tears. He cupped your cheek, wiping the falling tears with his gloved thumb. He was like a guardian angel.

You were far too deep asleep to notice a thing, but he didn't want to wake you. All though it was very dark out, the dark eyebags were clear as day to prove to him that you needed the rest.

He leaned down to press a kiss to your temple, he whispers sweet nothings and an "I'll be back soon." It's not like you could've heard him but you definitely felt the breath of air onto your ear like as if someone was whispering a secret to you.

By the time you woke up you were met not with your partner, but his scent was in the air. Like it was when he was still around in the house. He visited you.

Just days later, you heard a rushed knock on your front door. It was dawn again and your hair was a mess. You walked to your door barefoot, mumbling incoherent words that could be insults as you were woken up from your beauty sleep.

When you opened it, it was your partner. He was there, in the flesh. His breathing was haggard, yet he smiles anyway. His hat was held on his hands like he took it off when running so much.

Your eyes tricked with tears, and hugged him tightly. "You were there, right? That night!" You wailed and your head was on his chest. "Yes, and I'm sorry for not coming sooner." He rested his chin to your head and brushed your messy hair gently, careful enough not to tug on it.

You finally came to your senses and picked your head up from his chest. You backed up from him and pushed him in anger. But not in a way that could definitely hurt him or make him fall. "Just who do you think you are, waltzing back home like as if you didn't disappear after weeks and didn't even bother to send a letter!" You cried, yet he remained his composure from calling you stupid things. He knows what you've been through during his absence and just wants to be with you.

He cups your cheeks and rubbed the tears off with his thumb, as he's done many times before. His eyes wore a gentle glow and the sweet smile on his face was blinding. It's not often you see a man so in love.

"I'm done with everything. I took care of it, I promise I'll be here for as long as I live." He tells you, with genuine and charm in his tone. He leans forward to press a kiss to your forehead. And another on your cheek. And then another on your temple. And again and again in every other place and you couldn't stop yourself from cry laughing.

You stopped giggling when he makes sure to stop and leave a kiss on your lips. A long, tasteful and blissful kiss. You could still feel the warmth on your lips even after he pulled away. He ends it by just leaning his forehead to yours till the only thing you could hear from each other was your breathing. Even when he's away for so long, he'll always count on you to wait for him.

I hope u like this dear requester because I don't think I'm that good in writing actual fanfics LOL I'm only good at headcannons

#. bee writes #genshin x reader #genshin imagines #kunikuzushi x reader #scaramouche imagines #scaramouche x you #scaramouche x reader #scaramouche #kunikuzushi x you #wanderer x reader #scaramouche x y/n #genshin impact

[lettucedloophole]

i think it's easier to agree with terfism in concept, that a woman is just an Adult Human Female and this is actually liberatory rather than regressive & confining.

but in practice, in terf spaces you'll find:

cis women sexually harassing each other (some even talked about wanting to rape women, but since they weren't Male it was a-ok. certainly not as much of a biggie as a trans woman peacefully existing online, anyway.) there is also so much shaming of formerly prostituted women, rf or not, & rape/dv victims.

weird racism and nazi shit! much like the rapey people mentioned above, while some terfs wouldn't outright support racism, they'd tolerate it and follow "white supremacist feminists" or "radical feminists" making anti-semitic jokes (cough cough. radfem hitler) some terfs thought they were weird privately but there was no move to push them out of terf spaces like there was with Transfem Lesbians Existing.

this is also racism & nazi shit... when women's march changed their logo, there was a huge backlash in terf spaces about how this silhouette–

–was male, or meant to be a trans woman. of course, a lot of people were like "that's racist because some woc have that nose type." i saw two responses to that argument-- 1), it was actually the brow bone which was male, so it wasn't racist, and 2) women's march did this on purpose to make terfs look bad (and? it worked lmfao.) i was shocked at just how openly, insanely regressive this was, and it illustrated a point to me about terfs-- they will throw women under the bus who look masculine (like, any woman who could've had that silhouette) to keep the trans moral panic fueled.

more on throwing masc (cis) & other women under the bus-- i saw terfs who'd spent time in those spaces for a while began to question if muscular women in wrestling were "real women" or if they were "a man pretending to be a woman." trans women were made fun of for their "male" features, which of course, weren't male specific. they mocked vaginoplasty & dilation to get to trans women, thereby also insulting the cis women who did those things (which, they seemed to either not know about or just didn't care.) at one point, a cis tirf was talking about her experience getting harassed as trans in the bathroom and a bunch of terfs ganged up on her to call her a liar. so, believe women until it goes against your political agenda i guess? and, for that bbc article on cis lesbians feeling pressured to sleep with trans women, they literally interviewed a cis lesbian who'd been accused of rape multiple times, including in bathrooms. but trans women are the actual rapists, right?

one thing that's very sad is how woc in these spaces will see things like, nazis coming to terf events and being Allowed to stay there and plead for the movement to change, as if... anyone cares about woc here? terfs don't care about masc or non-white women considering how their rhetoric negatively impacts both.

crazy amounts of terfs claiming they just care about trans people and don't want them to hurt themselves, thennn calling trans people mutilated freaks & posting pictures without consent, even of minors, of surgery results good and bad.

and concerning the last point, this is just some contradictory things i've seen in terf spaces concerning cis women & afab people, but really the transmisogyny should be enough to stop your support of it. even if terfs managed to liberate all afab people somehow, trans women's well-being is important by itself. i just think these contradictions i've seen personally work nicely to poke holes in terf ideology.

#radical feminism #trans inclusive radical feminism #ex-terf #ex terf #tirf #trans inclusive radfem #tw misogyny #tw transmisogyny #tw transphobia

[lowkeyrobin]

Hello I was wondering if you’d be able to write a Ranboo x Gender neutral reader, and they both just got into a heated argument that left them both crying (only if you’re comfortable with writing something like this, I’d not I completely understand, also thank you for your concern, I really appreciate it) :)

honestly struggled to find smthn to make an argument out of but I think I got something! oneshots are a little difficult for me bc I get burned out and I think the actions but can't find the right words LMAOOOO ; but this is totally find to request dw!! and of course, if you ever need to talk my messages are always open 🫶🫶🫶 ; also istg I have other ranboo headers they're just in my drafts bc I've only been working on reqs lately LMFAO

RANBOO ; burnout

summary ; youre both burned out and stressed, and take it out on each other

warnings ; language, fighting, reader is described/talked about as a writer, angry mischaracterization (it makes sense in context trust me)

word count ; 1.4k

masterlist

Both you and Ranboo had been working your asses off recently.

They had themselves so tied down to content creation that it was becoming a personal prison cell. It was like everything he did was only to appease his fans, and he didn't know how to just calm down and slow things down for his well being. From the constant, long streams to the talks with merch and production teams, it never ended. Plus, the infinite cycle of scrolling online to see all the hate they received, it was becoming too much.

You, on the other hand, constantly kept working and working through the lack of motivation and burnout with no breaks. No matter how much people reassured you that you could take a break and you didn't have to stick to a schedule, it didn't do anything. You were determined to fill out each and every request even if you barely had any idea what you were doing, you'd stay up late trying to block out what to write and how to put it into words to appease your followers. Three times a day, seven days a week, every day of the month, about 2000 posts a year, if you kept that up.

You were dedicated to writing, you loved it, and you loved that you were able to turn something you loved into a job considering "real" jobs didn't work out for you. You had streaming, but you only did that if you were writing or needed ideas or help every once in a while and wanted to share any progress and whatnot. Your eyes tended to be bloodshot on the regular, being pulled down by saggy, dark eyebags.

You trudge into the kitchen, taking a cold bowl of mac and cheese and some water back to your office with you. Ranboo glares at you from the couch, holding his phone to his ear as he talks to some big guy with money, most likely. He doesn't say anything, but you notice the look on his face, his eyes glaring daggers into you as you walk away.

You sit back down at your chair, not even touching your food. You stare at the screen, your eyes slightly protected by the dark mode you'd reinforced on the website. Your mind was blank, empty, vacant, muddled. There were no thoughts behind your glazed eyes.

Your head pounded in pain, caused by all the blue light absorption you'd been taking in recently. God, Ran hated that. How you'd fucking complain of a headache and only do everything to worsen it. It pissed him off. It made him want to yell at you to just shut up about it, considering you didn't want to do anything to help yourself.

You type away at the keyboard once more, every button press causing a little click or clack to immerse from it. The keys light up a particular shade of white, a smooth wave like pattern glazing across it once more. You stop again, unable to finish the sentence once more.

You groan and lean back in your seat, feeling the utter disgust around you. You oh so desperately needed to sit in the shower and cry, considering your stress and pain, but you couldn't. You needed to make these people happy, you owed them. You owed them for giving you a stable job and a roof over your head, the least you could do was have their requests out within a few days.

You sit and ponder about your partner. You were sure there was no love left anymore. Both of you were too financially dependent on one another to up and leave, so it had to work for now.

Ranboo, now not on the phone, nearly slams the door of your office open, smelling the ice cold pasta you hadn't even touched a few feet away. He's quick to raise his voice with a stern tone, pissed off at you once again.

"Dude, I told you dinner was ready an hour ago, what the fuck? And then you just bring it in here and don't even touch it just to stare at the damn screen some more? Are you fucking kidding?"

You roll your eyes, not wanting to deal with this again. "Fuck's it matter? This is my job, Ranboo"

"Your job isn't to please everyone who acts nice to you. Your job is to write quality content and not complain about burning yourself out or headaches that you could easily solve by touching grass! Go outside, this isn't even a job. You don't do anything other than write some stupid fantasy all day and feed into people's delusions, Y/n!" He quickly rants, scoffing at the end.

"Holy shit, you're one to talk! Meh meh, meh, I'm so miserable, and I do all these long streams for my fans, and I treat my partner like shit because I never spend time with them and enable their unhealthy behaviors! I take out my anger on them because I'm a lonely asshole." You quickly spit back, standing up from your chair.

They scoff, stepping towards you a bit, "You're so pathetic, I never want to hear you come to me with your problems again. You're dependent on me. You barely get any money off of that, let alone any to pay rent or buy your own groceries. Get into the real world where talking to fancy businessmen and actually working for your money is all you do! Walk in my shoes for one day!"

You roll your eyes again and scoff, "You don't think this is an actual job? I could say the same to you! You play video games all fucking day and beg for Twitch subs! Just because you have a fancy merch line and have some stupid show you're working on doesn't make you all high and mighty and more important than anyone else!"

"It does, actually, you have no room to complain! If you need a break, you can go take it. My schedule is busy every hour of the day, I have no time to do shit! You're an overbearing, selfish asshole!"

Now that got the waterworks going, that's what got you beyond the point of just petty arguing to genuinely fighting. You have no room to complain, yet you spend all day just trying to make people happy and not hate you, to just pump content out and pretend like you're okay. You bottle up your emotions so he won't have to worry about you, yet you're overbearing and selfish.

"You are such a fucking asshole! Everything needs to be about you, doesn't it? Every single fucking thing in the world, huh? Fine, screw you" You turn to grab the bowl of food, and quickly, out of sheer anger, throw it at him, shattering the ceramic bowl. "I hope I never see you again, go fuck yourself. You don't deserve shit of what you have, your platform, your friends, your money, anything. I hope your whole online empire comes crumbling down and you're left with nothing"

You snatch up your phone, wallet, and keys, quickly stomping past him as tears drip down your cheeks. He stands there, appalled as tears well in his glassy eyes. He tries to chase you outside once he realizes you're serious, but you'd already slammed the door so hard it might as well have fallen off the hinges. He wipes his eyes, cheeks a light red due to the sheer amount of anger he felt in the moment. He was soaked in cold mac and cheese, ruining his white hoodie.

Once the adrenaline wasn't coursing through his veins anymore, he sits himself on the kitchen floor, the cold tile against his hands being used as a grounding technique. Some ceramic dust lays on his shoes, some liquid cheese being smeared against his hoodie as he tries to use a towel to wipe the access off.

Fuck, what did he just do?

He sits in silence, rethinking the situation as tears slowly stream down his face.

He could only hope that you were safe on that bus to nowhere. That bus you used to just go anywhere but home, just to escape the horrible life you lived inside that house. The house that bound you to its walls so you couldn't escape.

You couldn't escape the pain of your popular online presence or the pain of being trapped in that house any longer. Finally, it broke, the enchantment that kept you sealed inside.

Someone had to leave, and it looked like it was going to be you this time around.

#lowkeyrobin #mcyt x reader #mcyt preferences #mcyt oneshot #tommyinnit x reader #ranboo x reader #tubbo x reader #ranboo oneshot #ranboo imagine #gn reader #gender neutral reader #they/them reader

[magmythedevil]

Technoblade and Liam vickers similarities

I made this post bc technoblade was a hugeeee hyperfixation of Mine, so comparing him to my actual favorite creator at the moment brings me a lot of joy so this is extremely self indulgent lmfao

Deep Voice (?) Liam's is less deep so im not sure

Both are very inactive, and Just post content when they feel like it

Both have a niche community of very dedicated fans that have been around since the start of they careers

But both got more popular after they joined a group ring of other popular creators

Similiar speech manerisms and patterns

White nerd boys in glasses /endering

Big sense of humor that not everyone understands

Both don't use the popular social medias like the other content creators use all that much, they prefer Discord

Very reserved about personal informations. Making them the most mysterious content creators out of the other ones

Dont really care about clout.

Have been on YouTube since 2013/2014

Both got almost cancelled by twitter stan accounts of the big popular thing theyre being part of spreading out of context stuff ( techonables case was worse )

Both had a anime phase as teenegers

Dont show they face that much

Both got more recognized by a personal project of them that went viral (potato war and Cliffside)

Maybe i Will ad more

Technoblade was a Minecraft content creator that was loved by a lot of people. He was known for his Very smart Gameplays strategies. he died june 2022 at the very young age of 23 as a victim of cancer, rest in peace </3

#murder drones #liam vickers animation #technobabble

[thatblackravenclaw]

Pen Pals

a/n: you guys know how Andrew Garfield’s parents are British but he was born in L.A. but he still has a British accent that’s not extremely British with a little bit of an American twinge? that’s what the reader sounds like. also, i go by the grades of everyone in the books so Cho and the reader are a year older than the golden trio and a year younger than the twins. 

Blog Details | Let’s take a trip

Fred Weasley x Black!fem!reader (Ravenclaw)

warning(s): british slander bc im a raging american (RED WHITE AND BLUE MF THESE COLORS DON’T RUN BITCH lmfao please believe me when i say im joking), cursing, mention of drugs and alcohol use, tooth rotting fluff

word count: 3.3k

.

.

.

“Are you writing to that British boy again?” I hear from over my shoulder.

“Yes, and have you heard of personal space?” We erupt in giggles as I push her away.

I close my notebook and move from my desk to my bed. The foot of my mattress is barricaded with boxes. I look around and see my childhood home become empty and filled with boxes and buckets. The walls that were once painted with polaroids of my friends and family from over the years is now back to its basic color of brown that was painted when I was born. My desk is no longer covered with knick-knacks and clutter. The room is just empty. I’m happy that my mom got promoted so my dad gets to go back to his hometown, but it’s going to be hard leaving a place I’ve spent ¾ of my life in.

My mom is a Magizoologist. She came to the United States 20 years ago for a business trip. My dad is a Dragonologist. Their paths crossed when she came to help take a look at a sick Dragon. He showed him how their sanction work and over time I guess they became close because 3 years later I was born.

We used to go back and forth between Illinois and England for about 4 and ½ years before mom decided to just move here. I guess the distance was just a little too much for them, so she decided to move here and now we’re moving back.

I lay down on the bed and stare at the ceiling. It’s scattered with glow in the dark stars that I begged for when I was 7 and ten years later, here they still stick. I’ve been asking dad for four years to take them down. He always said he’d get around to it.

The air feels dry, and my throat is scratchy. I’m trying my best to hold my tears at bay. I love England. It’s a second home to me. Whenever I’m out for summer break I go to my grandparents’ house in Norwich. This is different though. I’m going to be living there now. The British accent I had when I was younger has faded overtime to an American-British hybrid. I’ll surely be made fun of for it.

Maya lays down next to me. We’ve been best friends since the 3rd grade. Just the two of us against the world. Now I have to go through the rest of university without her.

“Maybe it won’t be bad. The worst part is going to be eating their food.” Her jab pulls a smile to the corner of my lips.

“I’ve heard the food at Hogwarts is actually pretty good.”

“Not possibly better than Ilvermony.”

“Never!” I dramatize the word with a gasp. Really selling it as if saying Hogwarts food is better than Ilvermony is a federal offense.

The dust settles and a silence washes over us. It’s a comfortable silence. Soaking in our last moments together. I know it’s not forever. I get to come back here on holiday, and she can use the floo network to visit me, but it won’t be the same. This is the person who has a key to my house because she’s considered family. The same person who that brings me an extra banana nut muffin every day before school just because she knows it’ll bring a smile to my face. I won’t get that anymore.

“What time are you guys leaving tomorrow?” Her head turns towards me, but I keep my eyes trained on the popcorn ceiling in fear that the tears I’ve been holding back will give me away.

“Early. I think 6. We’re meeting the realtor with the keys at 7, so we need to make sure that all of our stuff gets transported this in one fell swoop since we’re apperating there and apparently mom came up with a spell to have our stuff apperate to the new house.”

“Hm. Have you told British boy that you’re got accepted into Hogwarts?”

“Fred doesn’t even know what I look like. Let alone that I got accepted to the same school as him.”

“HE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE?” I slap my hand over her mouth and shush her.

“Bitch, shut the fuck up. My parents are right down the hall and don’t know I have a pen pal. They said it was dangerous because people pretend to be someone they’re not, but what the hell?”

She pushes my hand off of her mouth and sits up. Her back meets my headboard and she straight ahead at the door.

“Do you know what he looks like?”

I nod my head yes before rolling off of the bed. I feel to the last page of my journal and find and find a polaroid of him and his brother George from when they went to something called The Quidditch World Cup. I do a quick look over before making my way back to the bed and offering my hand to Maya. She looks at the picture and you can almost see her eyes bulging out of their sockets.

“He has a twin brother?”

“No it’s just someone he met at school.” I resist the temptation to roll my eyes at her comment, but the attitude goes completely over her head.

“Is he single?”

“Maya!” I exclaim with my jaw dropped. “What? You can have a twin and I can’t?”

“Oh hush. You said yourself that you don’t even date white boys.”

“That was before I saw this one. Besides, he’s a ginger so he’s exempt from that statement.”

“I’m really going to miss you Maya.” We make eye contact for the first time in a while and her eyes soften.

“I’m gonna miss you too Angel.”

She looks down at her watch and tells me that it’s fifteen minutes to ten meaning it’s almost curfew. We share one last tearful goodbye as she walks out of my bedroom door for the last time.

.          .          .

Sure enough, at 5:45 my dad woke me up and told me it was time to get ready to leave. I had taken one last look around my room and made my way downstairs to meet my mother so we could all leave. Right as the clock struck 6, my parents let me grab the powder and be the first to see our new home.

I stood in the foyer and tried to convince myself that it isn’t the best house I’ve ever seen. It’s got a cottage core vibe going on, on the outside. It’s cozy, but big enough for all of us. I wanted so badly not to like it. We went to the backyard and there’s a small river filled with a family of ducks. To the right there’s something that looks like a shack, but bigger. My parents then explained to me it’s my own apartment. That’s when the smile broke across my face. I was finally getting my own space.

The house tour didn’t last long due to the tight schedule we are on. I ended up just waving my wand and letting the magic unpack my stuff as we were right back in the fireplace. Why? Because tomorrow is the first day of school and I have not done any school shopping. The stuff on the list differs a little bit from the shopping list we had for Ilvermony so dad thought it best to wait until we got here. We had to go to Diagon Alley anyway for everyone to open up a bank account.

Now, I’m standing in Madam Malkin’s getting measured for everything. Once I’ve been basically poked and prodded all over my body with clothes pins, I stare out the window and watch everything and everyone pass by. As if someone had played a slow potion button, I see a whole family of red heads walk down the cobblestone and sure enough one of them is Fred. I snap my head down and try to cover my face with my hair. I don’t know why I did that. Once again, he has no idea what I look like.

“All done. You can step down now.” I look over to Madam Malkin and grab my uniform and robe out of her hands. I thank her and rush out the door. Thankfully my parents are done with their list too so we decide to go home.

.          .          .

The next 18 hours go by quick. I didn’t get a chance to really enjoy my apartment or decorate it due to packing up my trunk since we once again left early in the morning for transportation.

The train ride was painfully boring. No one told me how long it is from England to Scotland. I sat with some mundane people whose names I don’t remember. They were also half asleep and exchanged pleasantries only out of politeness. We bought some stuff off of the trolley and then went back to our own worlds.

At one point it became a little suffocating and I needed to pee so I got up and started walking through the cars when I heard a “Have you heard from her yet, Fred,”. I had stopped before becoming visible to their compartment. He told them no and that he was a little worried. That’s when I remembered that Maya distracted me so I never got to finish the letter.

At the moment, I’m standing at the front of the line of 1st years because I’m new as well but I’m older so I get to get sorted first. My hood is up and I’m looking at the ground, suddenly interested in my shoes. Professor McGonagall informs everyone that I’m a new student from the American wizarding school and I feel my face heat up, knowing the amount of comments I’m about to get from everyone.

She calls my name and I carefully walk up the stairs. At this point my hood is still up so no one has gotten a clear view of my face. I want to do a big reveal of sorts. I sit down and let the hood slide from off of my head. There’s gasps from all across the hall. Some whistles from a few guys. Whispers from a few girls. A handful of people conveyed nonchalant expressions which I greatly appreciate over being fawned over. My eyes gravitate toward the Gryffindor table and I catch Fred already looking at me. His friends are nudging him with an elbow while also looking at me. I guess that answers the question of if he told his friends about me or not. I can’t decipher how he feels, but the adoration on his face calms my nerves enough.

I break our eye contact to look back down at the floor as not to fall off of the stool. I make haste to the Ravenclaw table. I greet everybody and they instantly start asking questions. I laugh as I can’t understand them all at once, but it’s funny hearing them squabble like seagulls. A hand is placed over mine and I look in the direction of where it came from. A beautiful Asian girl gives me a small smile.

“Hi y/n, my name is Cho.” I return the smile and tell her that it’s nice to meet her. A silence washes over the table. I become befuddled and look around to distinguish if I did or said something wrong.

“I thought you were American?” Someone says from the other side of the table. I don’t catch sight of who said it, but respond, nonetheless.

“I am. Well, I’m half. My mom is American and my dad is British. I was born in Manchester but was raised in America.”

An understanding nod is shared amongst the table in hearing vicinity and the conversation ceases as someone else is sorted into Ravenclaw.

.          .

After dinner the prefects give the first years a quick tour of the castle and show them to their houses. Cho snuck me with the other 5th years. I’m thankful as I far from want to be touring the castle with a bunch of children. Besides, I have a map of the school and I’ve created a spell that can bewitch the map to help me find my classes.

We make our way up the many staircases and are faced with a large door with an Eagle head as the knocker.

“The only way to enter the common room is by answering a riddle. If you get it wrong, then you have to stand here until someone else comes and says the correct answer or until someone from the inside opens the door.” She says to me. I nod my head in understanding.

“Wanna try it?” Another Ravenclaw asks me. A male. I believe his name is Talbott. I nod my head again and step closer to the door.

“When young, I am sweet in the sun. When middle-aged, I make you gay. When old, I am valued more than ever. What am I?” The voice bellows as the Eagle moves its beak. It shakes my core a little bit.

I look around at the other Ravenclaws. Some with quizzical brows. Some with a knowing look. Others just looking and awaiting my answer. The answer would have caught me up if it weren’t for the last clue; “When old, I am more valued than ever.”

“Wine.” There’s a click sound as if unlocking a lock, and the door slowly opens. Smalls cheers are shared as we walk in.

I’m stuck at the entrance of the threshold inside by the sight in front of me. It’s probably the most gorgeous room I’ve ever seen. The ceiling is coved and gives the illusion of a clear night sky. Stars litter the ceiling and give off the effect of actual twinkling. A blue velvet couch sits in front of a fire, with matching chairs on either side. What really catches my attention is the enormous statue of Rowena Ravenclaw in front of a bookcase. We never had anything like this at Ilvermony. Our emblem was a serpent and we would just have those displayed in various parts of the common room. I watch as everyone goes to various parts of the room while some go behind the bookcase. Cho grabs my hand and also brings me behind the staircase. She shows me that behind this staircase is where the dorms and bathrooms are. I follow her up the staircase and to a dorm. The rooms inferior to the common room but not any less gorgeous. The beds align with the wall as each dorm is in the shape of a tower.

“I see you got the middle bed. Seems fitting as you’re new.” No malice in her tone, though I can see in some way it might have seemed like it.

I sit on the bed and exhale. Truly exhale. This whole journey has been happening too fast. Now that I’m sorted into a house, everything else seems easy. I went over my schedule with Cho and we have all the same classes except Defense Against The Dark Arts. I guess I’ll survive one class without her.

“Well come on lazy bones.” A different girls says to me. Anastasia I believe.

“What?” I sit back up and ask with pure curiosity.

“It’s time to get ready for the party.”

“What party?”

.          .

The beginning of the year party. The party where everybody gets blacked out and regrets it in the morning since we start classes at 8 am.

I believe I heard someone earlier yell about flower. A Hufflepuff I believe. I had put on the sluttiest thing I owned and made my way down to the party with everyone else. None of us wear heels, as not to be caught by the caretaker.

The party is in full swing when we open the door the ballroom. The lights are dimmed, but the strobes of light are pungent. We barely make it to the drink table without bumping into everyone on the way. At the drink table is a tall red head with another tall read head which I can only assume is me about to be dealing with the consequences of my own actions.

“Excuse us,” Cho exclaims at the two while trying to push our way to the punch bowl. They look our way and go to move but freeze when they set their eyes on me.

“Y/n?” Fred asks/yells.

“In the flesh,” I yell back.

His smile reaches his eyes as he pulls me in a hug. My face in brought into an awkward place where it’s not quite his chest but not quite his stomach either. I wrap my arms around his middle and hug him back. He smells like cinnamon. I welcome in the scent as we hug for a few more seconds. I can only imagine what Cho is thinking right now.

We pull back at the same time and he begins to speak again. I can’t really hear him over the noise of the ballroom. I look in the direction of the entrance of the room and point to it. He nods his head and we walk towards it, hand in hand.

The door closes behind us but we still stood with our hands intwined.

“Pen pals for 4 years and you didn’t tell me you were transferring.” He exclaims while keeping his voice down.

“I wanted to surprise you.” I say sheepishly.

“Considered me surprised.” He smiled no longer reaches his cheeks but its more somber.

We hear footsteps coming from the far end of the corridor. He pulls me and we start running. I don’t know where we’re going but I trust him. A giggle threatens to out my mouth as we are going up the maze of stairs.

After what feel like forever, we make it to the floor that the Ravenclaw tower is on. I see that Gryffindor is also on this floor. In the middle of both is a spiral staircase. Great. More stairs. He leads us up to a room that looks like a classroom with multiple astronomy tools and an openness to the outside.

“Welcome to the Astronomy classroom.” I unknowingly let go of his hand as I look around in amazement. There’s a celestial sphere with all the constellations on it. A fancy telescope by the balcony. It’s quite literally the Ravenclaw common room in classroom form.

“Gods, this place is gorgeous.” I walk onto the balcony and stare up at the sky. All the stars twinkle and the moon is full.

“As are you.” I turn my body around and face him. He walks up next to me without breaking eye contact.

“Not a disappointment, am I?”

“Only a little. I expect more of an American accent.” I laugh at this before looking down at my shoes.

“You and everyone else. It’s there a little bit with certain words and phrases.”

.          .

I sit on the ledge and we talk for a bit. Not much to tell considering I know almost everything about him and vice versa. We talk about school and the people here which eventually leads to the topic of dating.

“Anyone here you fancy yet?”

“You could say that.” I look into his eyes and see if he’s able to read in between the lines.

He leans in and I hear my breath hitch. My fingers grip the railing. His eyes jump to my lips and back to my eyes.

“Who is it?” We both know.

“He’s in Gryffindor. Tall red head with freckles. His brothers are also in Gryffindor.” We inch closer.

“I might know him. What’s his name?” 3 inches apart.

“Ron.” He rolls his eyes at the answer with a chuckle.

“Shut up,” and then he kissed me.

.

.

.

Fred Masterlist | United Kingdom

#fred weasley fanfiction #fred weasley fic #fred weasley x reader #fred weasely x y/n #fred weasley x you #fred weasley x ravenclaw!reader #fred weasley x black!reader #ravenclaw!reader #ravenclaw reader #black!reader #black reader #fred weasley fluff #harry potter fanfiction #Harry Potter fic #harry potter fluff

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

[cws: psychiatric abuse, torture, homophobia, ableism, sanism, racism, pictures of taxidermy. boy this show is a lot sometimes lmfao]

-

so something @thecottageinthedark noticed recently that i'm still fucked up about is that pericles' cage in the asylum isn't actually a bird cage.

it's a bell jar.

for those who don't know what a bell jar is, it's a type of taxidermy display for preserving delicate specimens, most often birds. it's easy for their feathers to get dusty or disintegrate over time if they're left out in the open; a bell jar not only keeps off dirt and keeps people from touching them, but it's made to create a vacuum inside to keep everything where it is.

another layer to this reference is that the book The Bell Jar, by Sylvia Plath, is a retelling of her own experiences with mental illness and the attempts made to treat it at the time. notably, one of the major themes of the book is psychiatric abuse.

pericles is also not only a gay man forcefully committed to an asylum in what is most likely intended to be the 70s, but a very obvious and already horribly handled fantasy metaphor for both physically disabled people and POC. (in particular the talking animals' role in the worldbuilding heavily mirrors Black americans irl, which holy shit there is so much to unpack there all by itself. there is So Much)

(fun little bonus on the side: he's kept in a cell with extremely bright blue/white light 24/7, at an angle where it'd be even more difficult to block it out than if it were overhead. this would make it impossible to get any decent fucking sleep, which is widely recognized as one of the worst forms of torture to exist. they did this to him for 20 years straight.)

so, to recap: gay man and analogue for disabled people/POC, who is also portrayed as an ~evil crazy malicious psychopath,~ is kept in not only a display case for scientific specimens, but one specifically made--in-universe and out--to recreate something that is done to his demographic as a metaphorical disabled person/POC.

and not only that, and not only do people talk about him--in front of him, like he's not even there--as a specimen while gawking at him in this position, but he is being displayed like the stuffed and mounted corpse of a disabled person/POC.

he is said to belong on that display for 'the rest of his miserable [disabled/POC] life.' no one disagrees with this. he's painted as smugly bullying the violent abusive guard. in general he's portrayed as Scary and Evil Now for having been in this situation. and when he escapes, it kicks off what end up being the most heavy-duty problems for the protagonists, which result in the Bad Ending for the nibiru timeline; if he had stayed there, continued to be objectified and tortured with homophobic/racist/ableist violence for the rest of his life, the timeline almost certainly wouldn't have been doomed.

and they used a real person's autobiography about their experiences with psychiatric abuse for this. and to position them in the role of someone it should have not only happened to, but been even more horrifically dehumanizing and cruel.

yeah. i..... yeah.

the creators of this show are genuinely really good at putting together layered references like this, some more obscure than others, which are rewarding to discover and add depth when you do, and it is a crying fucking shame that they like to use it for shit like this. god damn lmao

#sdmi #scooby doo: mystery incorporated #professor pericles #cws in post #SDMItag #this is also why i very firmly believe that Other Parrot Behaviors of his were completely intentional #and i will be linking back to this post in future as evidence for that lmfao #anyway yeah jesus fucking christ i am defensive of pericles for A Few Reasons if You Can't Tell #do nooootttt get me started on the racism #uppity runaway slave who objects to being considered subordinate; inferior; an animal; and someone else's property #will get violent revenge on his oppressors the moment he embraces that objection and escapes imprisonment #and is only unhappy with being property because he's been driven crazy with Doesn't Want to Be Owned by Other People Syndrome #in the Good Timeline he does not have this syndrome; and he actively embraces exactly the degrading dehumanizing role he hated #and refused to accept and dedicated his life to breaking out of in the Bad Timeline where he's evil and crazy #this is used by other people to publicly humiliate him for profit; which he's Totally Not Humiliated by He's Happy Like This You Guys #sure cool great why not #love it #SDMIcrit tag #the crit files #thecottageinthedark

[rainywashere]

Come Along for the Ride

(Copy and paisted from my wattpad @rainywashere, follow me if interested!)

A/N: This got quite a few reads so I decided to continue writing this even though honestly this shit is so cringy to me, but if you enjoy my writing, thank you, and I wrote this for weird people like you (**us) anyways have fun reading whatever this shit is lol. I bet all you horny mfs didnt even read this and skipped to the smut didn't you... lmfao hope you enjoyed either way.

WARNINGS: Uh I'm not sure if spencer is dom or sub so you can decide. Sex in car, riding, sex without protection, public sex, smut.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I think I was the only person in the BAU to ever see inside Spencer Reids apartment. I don't think I would have ever gone in at all if he hadn't invited me over after work for a cup of coffe and to borrow one of his beloved books, which I promised to take very good care of. It reflected his mind. It was small. He told me he wouldn't know what to do with all of the space. What space he had was filled with books that I'm sure he had read front to back several times, boxes of random things, some of which I assumed to be evidince from cases that he had never managed to solve. 

"Sorry it's a little cluttered." He said awkwardly, grabbing an old cup of coffee from the counter and putting it in the sink. "I haven't been here in a while." We sat down at the small kitchen table together. "You haven't? Why?" I asked. "I spend most nights in the office." He said, starting to drink one of the two cups of coffee he had just made for us. I swear to god he was a fucking addict, but it was hard not to become addicted to it when you worked in the goddamn fbi. "Spencer." I sighed, putting my own cup back down on the table. "You have to get rest." He chuckled. "I do get rest, on the weekends." He said, shrugging. "Well you have to get more rest, okay Spence?" I asked him, actually concerned. "Yeah and I will!" He protested. "When we solve this case." I rolled my eyes. Mid roll my phone started ringing, it was hotch. "Speak of the devil."

"Hey Hotch, I've got Spencer with me. Whats up?" I put the phone on speaker so Spencer could hear, both of us were now high alert. "Hi, Morgan, Emily and I are going to check up on a potential suspect, we would apreciate if you both could join us in case we're in need of backup." He said, getting straight to the point. We both nodded even though it was just a phone call. "Yeah, of course, we're on our way."

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

We met Hotch and Morgan outside the BAU sitting in a black SUV. Spencer and I climbed in the back next to Emily as they greeted us. As Morgan started driving to the suspects house, Hotch told us about him. "He's a 32 year old white man Named Gorman White who lives with his spouse, Sarah White, who is a 30 year old white female. The male was turned in by an unknown caller who said they had seen him in the area of the crime not long after it was said to take place. It's not definite, but he's the best we've got right now."  He said, his eyes locked on the world outside of the window. Spencer nodded slowly. "You said he's got a wife?" He asked. Hotch nodded. "You think she might be connected?" He shook his head. "No, this was definitly one person, and assumed to be a male." He replied. "When you interview Mrs. White, be sure to do it in a seperate room from her husband, she might be scared of him." I said. Emily nodded in response. "If it would help, I would be willing to question her, if she would be more comfortable with a woman." She said. "That would be great." Hotch said as we aproached the house. "Now lets go over the plan one more time, Spencer and Y/N, you'll stay in the car to lookout of he runs or we're in need of backup. Emily, you'll question Sarah White and I'll question Gorman White, Morgan, while they're all destracted, you'll search the house for any evidince." We all nodded.

Everything was going as planned, Reid and I were in the car waiting and keeping an eye out for the unsub and kins of for eachother. I felt his eyes on me, and from his reflection in the window I was looking out of, my feelings were proved correct. I had never seen him look at something, let alone someone with such a look in his eyes. I blushed a deep shade of pink and continued pretending to look out the window as his Hazel eyes traveled across my body shamelessly as I stared at his own body through the reflection. He looked hungry, for me. And I had to admit I was starting to feel the same way. Me and Reid had always had a bit of a tension between us, but I had never thought about acting on it, in that moment it was they only thing I could think of. Hotch, Morgan, Emily, and our potential unsub were far from my mind as I took a breath and turned around.

He looked away quickly. "Uh, did you see anything?" He asked, turning back to face me, his eyes still a little needy, but his face cold and relaxed. I shook my head. "Did you?" I gave him that look, and I almost regretted it for a moment when I saw his eyes widen in fear, he knew I knew. The fear went away as he looked into my eyes and saw the same amount of lust he had in his own. He nervously looked over my shoulder at the house before gently grabbing my face adnd pulling my lips to his and kissing me softly. My eyes slowly closed, melting into the kiss. For  doa person that was always made fun of for never having a girlfriend, he was a really good kisser. I swear to god it's always the fucking nerds that surprise you. I placed my hand on his back and then in his hair as it began to get more heated. "How long do we have?" I asked, trying to catch my breath. "I don't know." He said, also short of breath. His cheeks were cherry red and I smiled, pulling his face to mine and kissing him deeply. He grabbed my waist and pulled my onto his lap. He let out a little moan as I rubbed against his boner. "We gotta be quick." I said, looking twoards the house. I could see Derek inside, I wasn't worried that he would tell, but I knew that he would never let us hear the end of it. Spencer nodded and unbottoned his pants, then doing the same to my pants as I slid his cock out. I pulled my underwear down as he got himself ready. I lined him up with my entrance and looked at him. "You ready?" He nodded quickly. 

I slowly lowered myself onto him and stayed there for a few seconds to adjust. Spencer had his head thrown back and his hand on my ass. I started slowly going up and down, both of us moaning. "Fuck, you feel so fucking good oh my god..." He moaned. I took that as a que to go a little faster, and in turn his moans got louder. "Fuck Spence!" I screamed, throwing my head back as I bounced up and down on his dick. He reached up and pulled my bra and shirt down revealing my tits. They shook in his face as I bounced up and down and I could tell he was getting there. "Fuck, fuck I'm almost there." He moaned, I was right. "Me too, its okay, cum inside me." I bounced up and down as both of us felt the pressure build up. We came together and I could feel him filling me up as we both moaned and I rested my head against his chest. He was still inside me and I felt so relaxed. "fuck, that was amazing Spencer." I kissed him before getting off and we both put our clothes back on.

I don't think Morgan saw, but Emily was acting a little weird when she got back into the car.

#spencer #spencer x reader #spencer reid #criminal minds #matthew gray gubler #public smut

[opinated-user]

Lmfao not Lily sending herself asks from her sock puppet account because she knows no one believes her 💀💀💀

As if this bitch hasn‘t spend the last years telling anyone who asked about her heritage to fuck off. She was NEVER open about how far removed she actually was from the culture, claiming to be 1/2 native (whatever that was supposed to prove) and an authority when it came to Native American business. (Dismissing reservoirs as ˋghettos and blaming native people for not getting out to seek better treatment. I‘m sure you have the screenshots.)

edit: sucky said "pretending", but it never specifies pretending what and LO still runs to tries to defend herself for something specific that it was never said. if this was a real person (it's not), it could have been any number of reasons that we accuse LO to be lying about: lying about the cancer, lying about the immigration fees for MO, lying about not writing Stockholm. pretending to be a safe adult that hasn't groomed and traumatized part of her audience for years would have fit as well! but LO, as impatient as she is, immediately hit "send" and went to answer herself without re-reading what she posted. more than that... did you notice that LO hasn't said anything about being "Cherokee" now? it's all "my heritage", "tribe", "status", but she isn't being more explicit than that, even though it wasn't that long ago that she called herself that on her bio. before, i was willing to concede that LO could become a citizen of the Cherokee Nation if she really wanted to because i thought her grandpa was claimed there. but now that a trusted source (at least a lore more trusted than LO in this specific issue) has come out to specified that grandpa never had anything to do with no Cherokee Nation, suddenly LO is very quiet about what culture she's lying about. it's all a big generalized catch all "indigenous/Native" with no meaning behind it. i need to point out too that LO is also lying when she says that she never discussed being a member of the Nation or not before. she has. many times she has explicitely and publicly said that she was completely disconnected from the Nation and didn't want to be claimed by then because she, as a racist ignorant white person, believes that reservations are ghettos and also cults where she'd be forced to live in against her will. speaking of screenshots! here is an archived post of LO admitting to a Cherokee anon that she does nothing to reconnect with the culture, that she's just Cherokee by virtue of... just being Cherokee. http://archive.li/ebfbH "i'm not obligated to perform a certain way because an ethnicity isn't earned" translates to "i want to be a Cherokee princess, so i'm and i don't have to aknowledge, know about or respect their culture at all.."

LO making "house's decor" as the whole reason why she can claim to be Cherokee despite her ancestors literally having nothing to do with Cherokee people. not the culture. not the Nation embracing her as one of their own. not the bond with her elders. not even her love for the community. her house decor makes her Cherokee. according to LO. this is also funny, considering that recently MO made her own post about how LO fills her house with "native" decor. she later changed this posts and MO tried to defend her, both of them looking still ignorant and racist.

LO has openly and actively refused the mere possibility of participating or engaging with her "heritage" in any other meaningful way that buying "native decor". she's white. there's nothing wrong with being white, but there's something wrong with wanting to have a POC label while dismissing and refusing to engage with the culture that actual Indigenous/Native people are trying so hard to keep alive.

#submission #lily orchard #lily orchard is brownfacing

[twistmusings]

Mod Azul I just had the craziest idea. Can I request teaching Octanaville how to drive? Just,,, Octavinelle and cars in general LMFAO??? Would their flying ability transfer to their driving ability? Have a driving playlist on hand? Would they decorate their cars? Idk bestie Floyd could be a car guy... Maybe? Would they listen to our wisened driving advice, or just ignore us? Or fail? Or just completely freak lmao. Would they prefer us driving? You dont have to answer all of that lmao, Im just having a grand ol' time imagining this. They're just so,,,, so silly. Hope ur having a slay day lol <3

I've been laughing at this idea for like a week. I hope your day is spectacular.

Teaching Octavinelle how to Drive.

CW: Don't teach a fish to drive, it will end like if you give a mouse a cookie. Unsafe driving practices.

Azul Ashengrotto

If you value your life, you will not get into a vehicle with Azul Ashengrotto.

He could probably learn how to drive very well if he wanted to, but he lumps it in with flying as a 'surface dweller' thing that he probably won't be doing for all that long, so he doesn't really care to dedicate the time to it. It's pretty common in certain parts of Twisted Wonderland to never set foot in a car, so it's really not that surprising that he hasn't ever been in one.

So he doesn't want to learn how to drive, but would he be willing to give it a shot once or twice to see what it's like? Yes.

He needs complete silence when he's trying to drive because he's focusing so hard. He looks like he might pop a blood vessel and he's white knuckle gripping the wheel. Machines like this are very uncommon under the sea in general. Trying to drive a car for him would be like the average person trying to figure out how to fly a plane. He cannot for the life of him grasp why the left turn signal and right turn signal use a lever that goes up and down? How do you tell the pedals apart? What are all the buttons on the dash?? (One of them looks like the seat with bacon on it? There a button that looks like it's supposed to rotate the car? There's a light on the dash that just says "ABS", what do abdominal muscles have to do with driving?) What in the fuck is "PRNDL"? WHY IS THE ENGINE SO LOUD?? HOW COULD LAND DWELLERS POSSIBLY LISTEN TO MUSIC WITH ALL THIS OTHER STIMULI GOING ON???

His final straw that made him swear to never get behind the wheel of a car was him jumpscaring himself with the horn. He pressed against it not even realizing it was a thing and was so embarrassed at himself that he wanted to hide.

As for being a passenger... he handles it better but not well. He's less afraid but because he's not used to being in something that moves without him being the main method of motion, he gets severe motion sickness.

Azul likes the aesthetic of cars. He thinks certain kinds look super sleek and cool. However, he could never be a car guy, and not just for the reasons listed before. He wouldn't be able to maintain it: it's too messy. Cars use a lot of oil and grease, and all of that would make it extremely frustrating for him to try and do anything with one. Even trying to refuel a car would make him feel the need to scrub his hands because the smell of gasoline is repulsive to him.

Jade Leech

If you value your life, you will not get into a vehicle with Jade Leech.

For the safety of everyone around him, Jade was forced not to get his license. He actually finds cars to be rather cool concept, and would love to drive one.

Jade cannot grasp how to drive in any serviceable way no matter how hard he tries. Something about it doesn't click with him. He brakes like he's trying to strangle his passengers, he doesn't have good speed control, and he is terrible at paying attention to if he's in drive or reverse.

Curbs are the enemy. When he hits the curb he will laugh and exclaim something to the effect of it being "like bumper cars". It should not be like bumper cars. Someone please come get him.

He takes every turn on two wheels.

He's allergic to using his turn signal.

He gets very easily distracted from driving by the buttons on the dashboard.

"It's only illegal if I get caught."

He is also a godawful passenger. He is the biggest distraction in the car because his curiosity gets the best of him and he just starts fucking around with the buttons and knobs.

As soon as he realizes he can, he cranks the AC because he likes the feeling of cold air.

Floyd Leech

If you value your life, you will not get into a vehicle with Floyd Leech.

That being said, of the three, Floyd is the only one who is sometimes a good driver. So long as he's in the right headspace for it, he can drive very safely and responsibly. It's when he decides to freestyle it that you have to worry.

No one can tell him shit. Don't even try. If he's behind the wheel it's trial and error, and that's everyone else's problem. Vehicle operation laws are a suggestion. Godspeed to the brave, brave idiots who get into the passenger seat. However, despite this, he's very quick to pick up how to do it.

He actually does better driving with music. He gets into his own zone and the music give him enough stimulation to make him be able to focus on how to drive well. Plus it makes it feel fun for longer! He could probably last close to an hour and a half in the car driving just by listening to a bunch of fun music he can groove to.

He failed his first time getting his license because he 'wasn't feeling it'. He did eventually get it though! If for no other reason than just in case he needed it in an emergency. (Also to be the get-away driver if they need one.)

He is quick with the horn. And gets just a little road rage. Not enough to get violent but he definitely gets frustrated when people are driving too slow for his tastes.

"It's only illegal if I get caught" pt. II. He's less egregious about it than Jade, though.

No, it's when Floyd is a passenger that he is an actual nightmare to deal with. Being in a car all scrunched up with his long legs and not able to move around or do what he wants? That's basically his personal hell. He gets grouchy and snappy fast, and he will start fiddling or playing around and being distracting. He'll try and stick things out the windows to watch them flap against the windows, fuck around and stick legs up on the dash, and fuck with the radio settings to see what he can find.

When it comes to tinkering on cars, Floyd has middling interest in it. He would find it fun to do it a couple of times but it's not something he would have interest in long-term.

#answered;; #twisted wonderland #twst #jade leech #floyd leech #azul ashengrotto #sfw;; #humor;;

[mod-kyoko]

"Shatter Me" kirumi tojo angst fic

info: gn!reader, established relationship, tw: pstd, scars, mentions of execution, around 3,200 words

type: angst with hurt/comfort, oneshot, post-game AU

a/n: this is a completely indulgent kirumi angst I had cooking up, basically this is set after post-game where everything was a simulation and the damage done to the 'characters' is done to them irl title is a reference to this song which I personally think suits Kirumi well but who knows lmfao

⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡

it was all like a horrible nightmare, a nightmare you weren’t even sure you could ever wake from. all the death, the pain and the misery would never be something you could shake from. every single trial, each passing moment your life was on the line… yet each time someone dies, you just wished you took their place. you survived, at what cost? only to be told that your talent and memories were nothing more than a fabrication to appease an audience? you never really found out if those interview videos were real or not…  you saw yourself, clear as day; “if I were in Danganronpa…I would love to be an Ultimate !3$5&*+...I would kill in a way no one has ever seen!”

did you really say that? was that even you, looking up at the camera with wide, child-like eyes declaring you’d… kill? In some ways, you wished you were the first to go out… so you didn’t have to witness the death of your own lover.

kirumi tojo… the “Ultimate Maid” or so they wanted them to all believe. you instantly connected with her; her calm, composed and almost motherly demeanour sucked you in like a moth to a flame. even from the beginning it seemed like she felt it too, she treated you differently than the others. she kept her ‘devoted’ maid self but she checked on you more often, she always asked if you needed anything unprompted, and poured you more tea when you were finished with a cup. you spent many moments alone with her, she enjoyed your company and laughed at your stupid jokes. the first time you kissed her; it was in the spur of the moment, you weren’t thinking. she was just so beautiful, up close to you and asking you in a soft whisper if you wanted sugar with your tea. yet when your lips connected to hers, she was shocked of course but she didn’t pull herself away from you.

what things you would do just to go back to those days, where the worries of murder and despair weren’t constantly plaguing your mind. nights upon nights you sat in your room, staring up at the ceiling asking yourself why kirumi went to the extremes that she did. It was sickeningly twisted what the motive that was created for her was, the prime minister of japan… it sounded silly now you thought of it outloud, if you knew about the truth behind it all you would definitely have thought that it was some poorly written story by a teenage girl. However, you couldn’t even fathom that thought as you were screaming and crying at kirumi that she was a traitor and betrayed your trust. you regretted those words deeply… as those were the last words you ever said to her before she was executed. you barely watched it and the little moments you did watch were enough to make you heave up. the last memory you thought of kirumi was her lifeless body on the floor, splattered and unrecognisable.

…

you looked up. your eyes just met with pure sterile white walls. after the events of the killing game, the simulation… waking up with wires around your body, you never loved the colour white so much. you were currently sat in the recovery centre, where the various victims and… culprits were recovering from their in-game injuries. it made your skin crawl to think that the simulated deaths acted as if they existed in real life too; it broke your heart to think how everyone else was handling it. However, your mind was entirely focused on one person and one person alone.

how long have you been standing here? staring at the door that led to kirumi’s recovery room? an hour? more than that? it’s not the idea that you didn’t want to see her, you were jumping off the walls in happiness to find out that your partner was alive but not unscathed. you were afraid - afraid of what was on the other side of that door, what condition kirumi would be in. would she be happy to see you?

you swallowed a thick lump in your throat, a shaky hand grasping the doorknob and you already felt the bead of sweat going down your forehead. you knew that you couldn’t just back away from this. bad outcome or not, you were going to see her, you just wanted to see her again.

with a gentle click the door opened and you peered in. there she was, dressed in a patient gown and sat in a wheelchair by the window, her eyes vacant yet staring at the courtyard of the facility. your heart skipped a beat as you held your breath, seeing her alive like this… you had to hold yourself to make sure that you weren’t dreaming and the nightmare would come back all over again.

“kirumi…” you called for her and your voice reverberated off the walls despite the fact you spoke in a whisper. her eyes widened, turning herself as fast as her condition would allow her to. you just wanted to run over to her, hug her tight and swing her around in utter joy. however, stepping closer you really started to see how serious her condition may be. minus the fact she was in a wheelchair it looked like her entire body was wrapped in bandages, at least, based on what you could see outside of the gown. her warm green eyes stared at you like if you were a ghost, hell… to her, you probably were as much as a ghost she is to you she didn’t say anything which worried you, you slowly sat down on a chair that was near the window as well. you looked out the window awkwardly, trying to think on what to even say. you looked back at her to find she was still looking at you.

“uhm… how are you feeling?” that was the only words you could even think of to say, there were a thousand questions running through your mind but you wouldn’t want to overwhelm her. she took a deep breath, it sounded uneven like if she had trouble getting air. finally, she spoke. “I feel pain all over. my head… it hurts.” hearing her voice was a relief even though it had a shake to it. “yeah… I can imagine it does hurt…” your mind flashes to her execution; from the small parts you saw through the cracks in your fingers, she fell head first. the thought made you cringed. “you… understand what’s going on, right?” you asked her. you were told that the others had been given information when they woke up… which was two days ago if you weren’t mistaken.

she gently nods her head in a twitchy sort of motion. come to think of it, her head seemed to wobble slightly even when sitting still. jesus. “all of… that… was fake? a simulation..? our… memories were toyed with…” you saw her bandage-wrapped hands clench which caused you to grit your teeth. you hated this so much.

“y…yeah… we were… fictional characters created for some.. dumb show or… whatever…” you didn’t tell her that there was the possibility that you all signed up for it. you weren’t sure what was true or not. “we are real now, of course… I’m… here.” you reached a hand to gently place it over hers, she flinched and you looked at her with apologetic eyes. “my purpose… was… just an illusion then…” she muttered with her brows wrinkling. “I… I thought I did what was right… for… my people. those people didn’t even exist…”

you grimaced. she meant her ‘fake’ past, right? the people of Japan was what made her murder another, her selfless devotion. “am I a monster?” those very words made your eyes widened and you shook your head vigorously. “no… no, of course not...  if I was in your shoes I would’ve done the same thing.” you said rather seriously and she looked at you, searching for a lie of some kind. she sighed softly. “you do not seem the type to do such a thing at all… you don’t have to try and make me feel better about myself. I see the person I am now.” “but you’re not a monster, kirumi… and I’m not just saying it to make you feel better. you’re not the only one to have motives to kill… the ones after were… much worse than yours…”

you saw the way her eyes darted around in shock, realising that the killings had continued after her death. she looked away and covered her mouth with her hand. she looked like she was going to be sick. “however, I had… betrayed you..”

hearing your own words echo from her lips made a deep guilt sink into your stomach. to think that was the last thing you ever said to her before she met her demise… because you were so damn angry, angry at her and… angry at yourself, angry at the sick twisted minds that constructed  the killing game. 

“I’m sorry.” was all you could say. kirumi looked at you completely shocked. why were you apologising…? she was the one that had killed, betrayed you and threw away everything you created together. despite her feelings, she relaxed into her wheelchair and breathed out, like if she had been holding her breath for some time. “I… I am sorry too…” 

god you wanted to cry right then and there as she said that. she was not innocent at all but something within you just wanted to hold her in your arms and never let go, you never want to lose her ever again. “are you… considering to go through the treatment…?” you asked, hoping to change the topic a bit even if it was still morbid. she nods her head gently. “yes… they said I should partake in small exercises like catching a ball… and… relearning how to walk.” 

you bit your bottom lip at that news. it could be much worse… at least it sounded like she had a chance to get a normal life at some point. “but… until then I will need assistance in basic needs…” she said with disappointment in her voice. it made you ache… simulation or not you know she feels useless right now. “I’ll be there to help you.” you were quite blunt in your words - but you meant it. you would be there for kirumi every step of the way, everything she needed you will provide. she looked at you shocked as she thought you hated her for the acts she did… she nods her head, however. “...thank you, dear.”

…

it had been a full month ever since you reunited with kirumi again, you supported her and helped her through the process of readjusting to this life, like you were. you were there for her exercises and treatment, watching her try to walk again was a heartbreaking but determination increasing experience. she wouldn’t be able to take full steps without assistance for awhile, however for right now she could at least stand from her chair and move to another quickly. it was only just at the start of this month that kirumi was out of the recovery centre and now sharing a ground-floor apartment with you. it certainly made things feel more ‘normal’ and no doubt a lot more comfortable for kirumi as she didn’t need to stare at blinding white walls anymore. you admittedly did everything for your girlfriend as it just became second nature to you at this point; you could see how desperately she wanted to clean or even wipe down a surface to feel like she was doing something. she knows that she was never supposed to be the ‘Ultimate Maid’ yet the yearning to do something, anything was still there. 

as for right now, you were cleaning the bathroom and kirumi sat at the dining table with a book. reading was now one of her popular pastimes, she greatly appreciated that you bought her so many books to read… books that she enjoyed quite a lot. hearing you scrub the tiles in the bathroom made for some interesting background noise, although she found your presence anywhere in the apartment to be relaxing. she would’ve indulged it some more if she didn’t just gain the most head-splitting headache possible that nearly made her drop her book as she gripped her head. no matter what, it didn’t seem like these headaches were ever going to go away. she sighed softly, putting her book on the table as she wheels over to the kitchen counter and opens the medicine cabinet which she could reach for obvious reasons. she grabbed her painkillers and quickly downed them with a swig of water. she closed the cabinet and was about to go back to her book until her eyes spied the set of kitchen knives.

her jaw clenched, looking down at the floor. she just wanted to be like… like herself again, like in the killing game. she was useful in it. everyone needed her, wanted her. she could service everyone and be the perfect girl she wanted to be. she leaned up slightly and grabbed the biggest kitchen knife, wheeling to the fridge and grabbing out a tomato. she just wanted to prove herself… that she could do something. she went back to the dining table, swallowing a lump in her throat as she stared at the red fruit, knife in hand as she positioned it just like how she remembers.

slowly, she attempted to cut slices of tomato as if she was preparing a salad of some kind. the cuts were irregular in size and certainly not perfect at all. kirumi clenched her jaw, trying to focus harder, she had to.try harder. no matter how hard she gripped the knife her hand would shake, becoming increasingly the more frustrating that she couldn’t cut a fucking perfect slice-

she flinched as the knife’s blade grazed her finger, nicking it and making it bleed. she dropped the knife quickly, looking down at her finger as the blood oozed out. she sucked in a loud gasp which you heard clearly. “kirumi? you okay?-” you walked into the dining room and your jaw went slack. “kirumi!” you rushed to her side, looking down at the little injury on her hand then at face. she looked absolutely shellshocked. “what were you doing…?” you asked, eyes darting around at the scene. “I… I just wanted to… show I’m useful…” her voice was no more than a whisper as she brought her finger to her mouth to suck on the cut with her brows furrowed. you frowned, putting your hand on her back and rubbing it slowly. “you don’t have to prove anything, rumi… you’re still recovering and adjusting… please don’t force yourself to do things like this, it needs to be taken slowly…” you massaged the back of her neck with your thumb, feeling her relaxed in your touch she wobbled her head in a nod. It seems she understood you. you hated treating her like she was a vulnerable child… but at this stage that was what she was at the moment. 

“I’ve finished cleaning the bathroom… would you like a shower?” you gently asked her. she didn’t like taking showers or even baths, something about the water made her want to shake all over. she especially disliked getting water on her hands although she couldn’t really tell you why just yet.

she stiffens for a moment, thinking about it for far longer than she needed to. however, she nodded her head and moved herself into the bathroom as you watched with a worried face. you were seriously getting concerned for her… it was like every day was complete pain for her, although that wasn’t far from the truth at all… what you would do just to feel her pain instead.

following kirumi into the bathroom, you closed the door and flashed a friendly smile at your girlfriend. “arms up, please!” she lifted her arms at your request, they were twitching a little but it was fine. you carefully but briskly took off her top, following up with her skirt and then undergarments. “can you get into the seat yourself?” you asked her, gesturing to the little bench inside the shower. she pondered for a few moments but ultimately nodded her head and began to lift herself out of her chair. you looked at her in awe, seeing her gain her strength each day always warmed your heart. you clapped your hands and smiled. “amazing! you’re doing so well, dear... I think you’ll be able to take steps soon!” you giggled softly to keep the air light, rolling up your sleeves as you grab the showerhead and turning it on. “Hmm… you think so? thank you, dear…” kirumi smiled softly. even when she felt useless, or feeling low, you always knew how to make her feel supported. she promised to herself that she would be able to walk properly one day for you, so you could walk along the beach together or even be able to walk into your arms like you used to. you hummed gently as you brought the shower head directly over her, the warm water falling over her severely scarred body. her entire body flinched and she felt like she was getting attacked at the moment. when your fingers combed through her sandy-sage locks to run the water through properly she started to relax into your touch. she was so glad that you were here for her, that you were looking after her and giving everything she needed, even if it embarrassed her or made her feel… incomplete. despite everything she’s done, the pain and misery she felt in her heart knowing that what she worked for wasn’t real - she could forget all of that when you were here for her.

you put the shower to the side and squirted kirumi’s favourite shampoo onto your hands. it was lavender scented and it often helped her fall asleep with the smell of her own hair. you massaged it into her scalp and you could see the moment her entire body relaxed and that she was completely at your mercy. it made you smile so much to see her content and not worrying about everything… you pushed her bang out of the way of her eye and slicked her hair back. her eyes opened to look at yours and the slightest tint of red went over her face. you giggled softly at this, leaning down to press a soft kiss against her forehead. “beautiful…” you whispered to her which caused her to blush more. she? beautiful? how can you say that to her face, when you were right there being perfect? “I love you.” she said it so suddenly that it caught herself off guard however she didn’t back down and stared confidently at you. you smiled, heart melting at such a cute confession. tilting your head to the side, you uttered back. “I love you too…”

perhaps, things will be better.

⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡⟡♡

-Mod Kirumi

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