#they're just connected to that thing in some shape way or form

[discountsoysauce]

I don't understand the idea that Victor has no backstory. Like- yeah, his backstory isn't as horrifically tragic and detailed as Eli's is, but we do know a good bit about him from what he's said so far.

His parents are pretty successful, so we can assume he grew up rich. Victor states that they write all of these books about family but have never taken time out of their day for him, even saying something along the lines of the last time they put aside time for him was his birth (not exact quotes, I don't have the energy to look back through the books rn), so we can assume that they were incredibly neglectful, most likely leaving him at home for days, weeks, maybe months at a time and probably not paying much attention to him even in times when they were home. Whether they paid someone to take care of him in that time or he had to learn to be self-sufficient is debatable.

I personally don't think they were physically abusive, and there doesn't seem to be any evidence at present that supports that idea. Verbal abuse is more likely, but I still don't think it was the case. It doesn't seem like they were around him long enough to do either. I don't think those things really need to be a part of his backstory to make it interesting or compelling. His parents were neglectful, and it shaped pretty much everything about who he is.

The biggest and most obvious one is Victor's obsession with attention. There are multiple references throughout the books of Victor craving attention from those around him, namely Angie and Eli. More than anything, Victor wants to be seen. He wants to be a part of something. He wants to be remembered and acknowledged and thought about. He craves the attention his parents never gave him. He doesn't want to be left behind or forgotten.

Being left behind is another big fear for him (I'm mostly speaking about Lockland here, as he becomes a bit less dependent after he becomes an EO, though there can still be an argument made about him latching onto Mitch and Sydney and Dol and Dominic in a kind of makeshift family he never had). He hates seeing Eli succeed because it feels like he's being left behind. He wants to be so intertwined with another person that they can't possibly forget him. He wants to form a connection so deep that it's impossible to sever. To Victor, there's a connection between 'success' and being left behind. He doesn't want to just be an expendable sidekick or an accessory. He wants to be an integral part of someone. Victor's life revolving around Eli is a symptom of his upbringing.

His social skills and general demeanor are also something that can be analyzed. From the beginning, he's set up as the antithesis to Eli, from social class to backstory to appearance to demeanor. They're the same at their core, but opposites in nearly everything else. Compared to Eli, Victor is a total recluse. He hates being around people, he avoids parties, and we barely see him interact with or pay attention to anyone except the people he genuinely cares about unless he absolutely needs to. His demeanor is off-putting, and he doesn't really make an effort to hide that, although he does just enough to make sure he isn't a complete social outcast. Victor grew up in one home with no siblings and parents who were hardly around. Compared to Eli, who was carted from home to home, meeting new people and learning how to blend in all the time, Victor likely doesn't have much in the way of social experience. He didn't have to hide who he was nearly as much as Eli did because there was no one there to see it anyway.

This being said, he is described as being a good liar and able to fool those around him, although notably worse at it than Eli. This one is more of a longshot, but I don't think it's improbable. Victor's parents were successful published authors who garnered their success based on the books they wrote about family. It's possible that Victor had to make press appearances at some point when he was younger, and learned how to lie for the cameras, or he just spent so long out of the company of others that he started seeing other people as more objects to use and less real living people, making it easier to learn the motions of manipulating them. Either way, Victor learns how to do or say the right thing to get someone to believe him, but he states that Eli is much better at actually faking emotions than he is. This is because while Eli spent his life following his father's death surrounded by people and thus learned how to change his entire self to appear more presentable to the general public, Victor only learned how to manipulate people through speech or actions. He can tell you exactly what you want to hear, but he can't put on a fake persona the way Eli can because he never needed to.

In conclusion, Victor does have a backstory, and it informs every aspect of his character, including his relationship to Eli.

#this isnt me defending victor this post got away from me a bit lmao #a not entirely serious mention of the idea that his skewed morality could also be a result of his upbringing #i mean #the man had no role models #and was pretty much raised on crime dramas #cmon #hopping off my soapbox now #i got tired near the end can you tell #Victor's backstory isnt explicitly outlines the way Eli's is but its There #i came up with most of this as i was typing #vicious ve schwab #vengeful ve schwab #victor vale #villains series #eli ever #eli cardale #vicious #vengeful

[seekingserenity333]

Astrology Observations - 1

Thank you everyone for the love on my first post! Please do let me know if things resonate with you, sending love! I'm still an amateur, so take what I say with a grain of salt. +18 parts are in red, you can ignore if you like!

(+18) 1- Venus in Scorpio natives might feel that love is like a slow burn poison, loving too much hurts as much. They are very intense when it comes to intimate relationships and even though they might try and satiate their sexual thirst with one night stands, they will try and find someone they can regularly see and form even a slight connection. They are also lucky in the genitals part- although they're prone to STDs and might feel a scare at some point, they should be careful.

(+18) 2- Uranus in the 1st house/Aquarius ascendants might be from a young age tech savvy, their parents might even ask for help figuring out new appliances. If Venus and Uranus make aspects, they might experience a long distance relationship with someone from a different culture. They might also like sexting/cyber sex

3- Sun in 12th House and/or Saturn in the 1st house might indicate an absent father. The natives might have to discipline themselves or they might have the other parent step up for them. This may also indicate their personality blooming late

4- Mercury sextile Venus might indicate a way with words, interest in literature and being a great communicator. They can calm down a heating argument just with their words, making both parties laugh even

5- Lilith in the 2nd house might indicate being underweight and problematic relationship with food. They might skip meals without even noticing and don't have much attachment to tasty food at all

6- Mars in Scorpio natives might feel a big rush of energy when they feel threatened, as if they can take down tens of people. If Mars aspects the ascendant or planets in the first house, it can give the native a strong build no matter the size/weight. They might gain muscles without noticing and have a triangle shaped body. (Though this depends a lot on other placements too)

7- Gemini placements can be chaotic and unstable. They might have different personalities with different people, and can feel strong mood shifts. In personal planets, the native might want to constantly keep themselves busy with all kinds of media like series, anime, books, manga, music etc. and they can't quite get enough. After being done with something, they'll go through social media and forums on the subject and engage in conversations until they find their next craving

#astrology observations #astroblr #astro observations #astro notes #birth chart #astro community #astro posts #astro placements

[liliomme]

Love Encounters in Your Solar Return: Exploring the 7th House 🫧

In astrology, the 7th house is one of the essential houses in a natal chart, representing partnerships, marriage, and significant relationships. It governs the way we approach and interact with others on a one-to-one basis, be it in romantic relationships, business partnerships, or even open enemies. The sign on the cusp of the 7th house, as well as any planets residing in this house, can provide insights into the qualities we seek in a partner and the dynamics we may encounter in relationships. This house also highlights our ability to compromise, cooperate, and negotiate with others, playing a crucial role in shaping our social connections and deep emotional bonds throughout life.

The 7th house in a solar return chart holds significance in providing insights into the realm of partnerships and relationships during the specific year of the solar return. It offers valuable information about the type of individuals one may attract or form connections with during that period, as well as the potential challenges or harmonious experiences that may arise in these relationships. Understanding the dynamics of the 7th house in the solar return can offer valuable guidance on how to navigate and make the most of the various interactions and partnerships that come into play during the year.

Take this with a grain of salt. ^^

🫧 Aries 7th House/Descendant

So, with Aries descendant in your solar return chart, you might just experience some truly dynamic and passionate partners during the year. You know, Aries energy tends to attract people who are confident, assertive, and independent, and boy, they're full of zest for life! It's like they radiate enthusiasm, and they're the ones who'll take the lead in relationships. How exciting is that, right? 🐚

But hey, let's keep it real, because with all that fiery energy, there might be some challenges too. You might encounter partners who are adventurous and love trying new things, which sounds like a blast, but sometimes their strong desire for independence could lead to occasional conflicts or power struggles. Not to worry though, communication and finding a good balance will be the keys to making things work and having a harmonious connection. All in all, get ready for a thrilling year with love encounters that are full of energy, excitement, and some memorable adventures together! 🌊

🫧 Taurus 7th House/Descendant

So, with Taurus descendant in your solar return chart, get ready for love encounters that are all about stability, sensuality, and grounded connections during the year ahead. 🎐 You might attract partners who exude a calm and patient demeanor, and GURL are they reliable and loyal! Taurus energy tends to seek enduring relationships, and they'll value the stability and security that you can offer in return. You'll find yourself drawn to individuals who appreciate the simple pleasures in life, and together, you'll build a strong foundation of trust and mutual respect. 💭

In these love encounters, expect to encounter people who are sensual and in tune with their senses. They'll appreciate the finer things in life, like good food, beautiful surroundings, and meaningful experiences. Oh, and their touch will be just magical😍 as they'll have a knack for creating a comfortable and cozy atmosphere wherever they go. You might find yourself slowing down a bit in their presence, savoring the present moment and finding joy in the little things that life has to offer.

One thing to keep in mind is that with Taurus' fixed nature, they may take their time when it comes to making decisions, especially in relationships. They won't rush into things, but once they're committed, you can count on their unwavering dedication. 🍾 While Taurus energy is steady and reliable, there could be some stubbornness at times, so learning to compromise and understanding each other's needs will be vital for a successful and lasting connection. Overall, these love encounters will bring a sense of comfort, stability, and sensuality into your life, creating a beautiful and lasting bond with partners who share your desire for a fulfilling and steadfast relationship. 👒

🫧 Gemini 7th House/Descendant

With Gemini descendant in your solar return chart, you're in for a year of love encounters that are intellectually stimulating, communicative, and ever-changing. You'll attract partners who are witty, curious, and versatile, they will keep you on your toes !! Gemini energy seeks mental connection and enjoys engaging conversations that span a wide range of topics. 🥂 You'll find yourself drawn to individuals who are great communicators, and together, you'll share a love for exchanging ideas and exploring the world through lively discussions. ✨ Gemini's dual nature brings a variety of experiences, so you may encounter partners who are open to trying new things and are not afraid of change. They'll bring a sense of fun and lightness to your relationships, and you'll have no shortage of exciting experiences together. However, it's essential to be aware of Gemini's restlessness and tendency to become easily bored. To keep the spark alive, finding ways to keep things fresh and interesting will be crucial in maintaining the connection. 🎰

You might find yourself in a year of multiple romantic interests or encounters, as Gemini is known for their ability to explore different options. Enjoy the diversity of experiences, but remember that open communication and honesty will be essential in navigating any complexities that arise. Overall, these love encounters will bring intellectual stimulation, adaptability, and a sense of exploration into your life, offering you a taste of the exciting and ever-changing world of Gemini energy. ૮₍ ´ ꒳ `₎ა

🫧 Cancer 7th House/Descendant

With Cancer descendant in your solar return chart, get ready for love encounters that are deeply emotional, nurturing, and focused on building a strong sense of home and family during the year ahead. You'll attract partners who are caring, empathetic, and highly sensitive to your needs. Cancer energy seeks emotional connection and craves a sense of security and comfort in relationships. 🫧 You'll find yourself drawn to individuals who are nurturing and have a strong desire to create a loving and supportive environment for you.

Expect a profound emotional bond with your partners. Cancer's nurturing nature brings a sense of warmth and tenderness to your relationships, and you'll feel cherished and protected in their presence. 🧸 They value the importance of home and family, and you may find yourself building a strong foundation with them to create a loving and stable household. However, be prepared for the intensity of their emotions, as Cancer energy can be highly empathetic and sometimes moody. Providing them with a safe space to express their feelings and being understanding of their sensitivity will be essential in maintaining a harmonious connection.

💭 You might experience a year of emotional growth and deep soul connections with your partners, as Cancer energy craves meaningful and intimate relationships. These love encounters will bring a sense of comfort, emotional security, and a feeling of being truly understood and cherished. 🫶🏻 Together, you'll explore the depths of your feelings and create lasting memories in the loving embrace of Cancer's nurturing energy. (´｡• ◡ •｡`) ♡

🫧 Leo 7th House/Descendant

OMG??! ૮꒰⸝⸝> ̫ <⸝⸝꒱ა let's talk about Leo descendant in your solar return chart 😍 Get ready for some seriously sizzling and passionate love encounters during this year! You'll attract partners who are confident, charming, and full of charisma. These individuals exude a magnetic presence, and you won't be able to resist being drawn into their vibrant world. ✨ Leo energy seeks attention and adoration, and boy, will they make you feel like you're the center of their universe! Their expressive and enthusiastic nature will sweep you off your feet and leave you feeling truly special and loved.

Expect to be romanced like never before. 💌 Leo's flair for drama and grand gestures means you'll be in for some epic declarations of love and attention. These partners will go above and beyond to show you how much they care, showering you with compliments, gifts, and lavish displays of affection. You'll find yourself in the spotlight, and they'll be more than happy to bask in your glow too. 🫶🏻 Their playful and joyful nature will bring a sense of fun and excitement into your relationships, creating memories that you'll cherish forever.

However, it's essential to be mindful of their need for recognition and sometimes, a bit of ego. Leo energy craves admiration, and occasional clashes of will might happen if they feel overshadowed or not appreciated enough. But don't worry, as long as you show them love and admiration, they'll be the most devoted and loyal partners you could ever wish for.🐚 These love encounters will be like a grand romance straight out of a movie, full of passion, excitement, and a love that shines as bright as the sun! Embrace the magic of Leo energy, and get ready for a year of unforgettable love !!! 🧸

🫧 Virgo 7th House/Descendant

Get ready for love encounters that are grounded, practical, and deeply caring during the year ahead. You'll attract partners who are intelligent, detail-oriented, and highly attentive to your needs. 👒 Virgo energy seeks to create a sense of order and efficiency in relationships, and they'll be the ones who remember the little things that matter to you the most. You'll find yourself drawn to individuals who are reliable and dependable, and they'll go out of their way to make sure you feel supported and loved. ( ˊᵕˋ )

Virgo's analytical nature means they'll want to understand your thoughts and feelings on a deep level, fostering open and honest dialogues. 💭They may offer practical solutions to problems and provide a sense of stability and security in your relationships. You'll be amazed by their thoughtfulness and acts of service, as they'll always strive to make your life better in every way they can. expect a strong emphasis on communication and meaningful connections. ⏳ However, be prepared for their tendency to be critical, as Virgo energy can be perfectionistic at times. They may have high standards for themselves and others, which could lead to occasional moments of self-doubt or nitpicking. Nonetheless, their intentions are always rooted in caring and wanting the best for you. These love encounters will be like finding a true partner-in-crime, someone who has your back and loves you unconditionally. ✨ Embrace the warmth and practicality of Virgo energy, and get ready for a year of love that's attentive, thoughtful, and deeply meaningful !!

🫧 Libra 7th House/Descendant

With Libra descendant in your solar return chart, get ready for love encounters that are all about balance, harmony, and finding a true sense of partnership during the year ahead. 🎆 You'll attract partners who are charming, diplomatic, and focused on creating a harmonious relationship. Libra energy seeks equality and fairness, and they'll be the ones who truly value your opinions and treat you as an equal in all aspects of life. 💗 You'll find yourself drawn to individuals who are social and enjoy the finer things in life, and together, you'll create a beautiful and aesthetically pleasing connection. (ㅅ´ ˘ `)

Expect a strong emphasis on communication and compromise. Libra's desire for harmony means they'll prioritize maintaining a peaceful and loving atmosphere in your relationships. They'll be the mediators, always seeking to understand your perspective and find common ground. 💍 Their romantic nature will lead to thoughtful gestures and a focus on creating memorable experiences together. However, be prepared for their indecisiveness at times, as Libra energy can struggle with making choices. Patience and open communication will be key in navigating any decision-making processes. 🌊 These love encounters will be like a dance of love, where you'll find joy in the beauty of partnership and the magic of two hearts coming together in perfect harmony !! 🎰

🫧 Scorpio 7th House/Descendant

You'll attract partners who are mysterious, magnetic, and deeply emotional. 🧸 Scorpio energy seeks profound connections, and they'll be the ones who truly understand the depths of your soul and share your desire for an authentic and meaningful relationship. You'll find yourself drawn to individuals who have an air of intrigue around them, and together, you'll embark on a journey of self-discovery and growth. 🥂 Get ready for love encounters that are intense, passionate, and transformative during the year ahead !!

In these love encounters, expect a rollercoaster of emotions and a profound level of intimacy. Scorpio's passionate nature means they'll bring a whole new level of intensity to your relationships. They'll crave a deep emotional bond and won't shy away from exploring the darker aspects of life together. 🫶🏻 Their loyalty and dedication will be unmatched, and they'll be your biggest supporter and confidante. However, be prepared for their desire for control, as Scorpio energy can be possessive at times. Trust and open communication will be essential in building a relationship based on mutual respect and understanding. 🐚Embrace the intensity of Scorpio energy, and get ready for a year of love that will leave you forever changed and deeply connected to your partner on a soul level. Rooting for you to experience the magic of Scorpio love! 🌊 These love encounters will be like a journey into the depths of your heart and soul, where you'll experience love in its most transformative and powerful form.🎐

🫧 Sagittarius 7th House/Descendant

Get ready for love encounters that are adventurous, free-spirited, and filled with boundless enthusiasm during the year ahead! You'll attract partners who are optimistic, open-minded, and love exploring new horizons. 🏖️ Sagittarius energy seeks adventure and expansion, and they'll be the ones who encourage you to step outside your comfort zone and embrace the thrill of life. You'll find yourself drawn to individuals with a sense of wanderlust, and together, you'll embark on exciting journeys both physically and emotionally. 🤩

Expect a sense of joy and spontaneity. Sagittarius' free-spirited nature means they'll bring a breath of fresh air into your relationships. 🫶🏻 They'll cherish your independence and will support your personal growth and aspirations. Their sense of humor will keep you laughing, and their positivity will be contagious. ✨ However, be prepared for their love of freedom and sometimes lack of commitment, as Sagittarius energy can be hesitant to settle down. Embracing open communication and giving each other the space to explore your individual paths will be key to maintaining a harmonious connection. 🍯

🍾 Embrace the wanderlust of Sagittarius energy, and get ready for a year of love that's filled with excitement, laughter, and the joy of exploring life's many wonders together! 🎧 These love encounters will be like an exhilarating adventure, where you'll explore the world together and create memories that will last a lifetime. Let the adventure begin! 🥂

🫧 Capricorn 7th House/Descendant

I am absolutely head over heels for this Capricorn descendant in solar return chart !! 🍾 Get ready for love encounters that are grounded, reliable, and committed during the year ahead! You'll attract partners who are responsible, ambitious, and deeply devoted. 🌱 Capricorn energy seeks to build a strong and stable foundation in relationships, and they'll be the ones who will support you in achieving your goals and dreams. You'll find yourself drawn to individuals who have a mature and practical approach to life, and together, you'll create a love that withstands the test of time. They'll be the ones you can count on, no matter the circumstances. 🍻 Capricorn's steadfast nature means they'll bring a sense of dependability and dedication to your relationships. Their focus on long-term commitments will create a sense of comfort and stability in your partnership. However, be prepared for their occasional reserve and seriousness, as Capricorn energy can be cautious in showing their emotions. Trust and patience will be essential in building a strong emotional connection and allowing them to open up in their own time. In these love encounters, expect a sense of security and loyalty.

These love encounters will be like a rock-solid bond, where you'll feel a sense of safety and support like never before. Embrace the reliability of Capricorn energy, and get ready for a year of love that's committed, enduring, and filled with a love that only grows stronger with time. 🧩 I'm absolutely smitten with the potential of Capricorn love for you! (੭˃ᴗ˂)੭

🫧 Aquarius 7th House/Descendant

ABSOLUTELY ecstatic to talk about Aquarius descendant in your solar return chart 😍 Get ready for love encounters that are unconventional, intellectually stimulating, and full of innovation during the year ahead! 🥂You'll attract partners who are unique, open-minded, and have a strong sense of individuality. Aquarius energy seeks intellectual connection and values personal freedom, and they'll be the ones who appreciate your ideas and encourage you to express your true self. You'll find yourself drawn to individuals who are forward-thinking and not afraid to be their authentic selves, and together, you'll embark on a journey of discovery and growth. 🌊 Aquarius' innovative nature means they'll bring a fresh perspective to your relationships. They'll cherish your uniqueness and will support your individuality. Their intellect and curiosity will spark lively discussions and inspire you to see the world in new ways. 💭 However, be prepared for their occasional detachment and need for space, as Aquarius energy can value their independence. Allowing them the freedom to explore their interests and respecting their need for autonomy will be key in building a strong and fulfilling connection. In these love encounters, expect a sense of excitement and originality.

These love encounters will be like a breath of fresh air, where you'll experience love in a way that's liberating and full of endless possibilities. 🧸 Embrace the uniqueness of Aquarius energy, and get ready for a year of love that's intellectually stimulating, innovative, and deeply empowering. I am absolutely enamored with the potential of Aquarius love for you !! 💫

🫧 Pisces 7th House/Descendant

My heart is overflowing with love and excitement to talk about Pisces descendant in solar return chart 😍Get ready for love encounters that are dreamy, soulful, and deeply spiritual during the year ahead! You'll attract partners who are empathetic, romantic, and in touch with their emotions. 🫧 Pisces energy seeks to create a profound emotional connection, and they'll be the ones who understand the depths of your feelings like no one else. You'll find yourself drawn to individuals who have a gentle and compassionate nature, and together, you'll explore the magic and mysteries of love. 🐚

💭 Pisces' dreamy nature means they'll bring a touch of magic to your relationships. They'll cherish your emotions and will be your rock in times of need. Their romantic gestures and intuitive understanding will leave you feeling truly cherished and understood. Their creativity and imagination will add a sense of wonder to your love story, creating beautiful moments that you'll treasure forever. 🎐 In these love encounters, expect a sense of enchantment and sensitivity.

However, be prepared for their occasional escapism and need for emotional boundaries, as Pisces energy can be highly sensitive. 💍 Showing them unwavering support and providing a safe space for them to express their emotions will be essential in building a deep and meaningful connection. These love encounters will be like a fairytale come true, where you'll experience a love that transcends the ordinary and touches your soul in the most profound way. 🫶🏻 Embrace the dreaminess of Pisces energy, and get ready for a year of love that's pure magic, enchantment, and a journey of deep spiritual connection. I'm absolutely swept away by the dreamy potential of Pisces love for you !! (∩˃o˂∩)♡

౨ৎ, liliomme.

Note

Hey, cuties !! This reading is based on my observations and research, which involves using my amazing friends (+ other people) experiences and exploring internet sources, with that I've put together some insights about love encounters and the 7th House. However, I want to emphasize that this is just a fun and fascinating hobby of mine, and I can't guarantee it's spot-on for everyone. So, while I'm super pumped that you all enjoy reading my astro-blogs, please remember that astrology is a wonderful journey of self-discovery, and my interpretations are just a piece of the puzzle. I'm here to spark curiosity and inspire you to explore the cosmic wonders that shape your unique experiences. That’s all, thank you again. ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶

#aries #taurus #gemini #cancer #virgo #libra #scorpio #saggitarius #capricorn #aquarius #pisces #astro observation #astrology #astrology observation #astroblr #astro community #astro placements #astro observations #solar return chart #solar return #solar return observation #sr chart #tumblr #astrology chart #venus #sun #moon #mars #descendant #7th house

[the-modern-typewriter]

Hey! Asking for some writing advice here.

How does one write a villain exactly. In a very simple world with no superpowers and stuff how do you give them motivation. How do you make them slowly descent into villainy. Somehow when the villain actually thinks they're doing the right thing until the very end?

Thx love

There are a few different questions here that I'm going to try to to unpick.

I'll start with a brief overview of the connections between protagonist + antagonist, just because recognising them can be really useful in shaping your own ideas. Then I'll dive into motivation. So.

Antagonist + Protagonist = CONFLICT

If you know your protagonist well, then you have all the ingredients you need to write a great villain/antagonist for them too. Here is why.

Your villain/antagonist is, at the most basic fundamental starting point, something that is between your protagonist and what the protagonist wants/needs. As a very simple example, if your protagonist wants to make sure that everyone is free, then your antagonist is going to in some way be involved with making sure they are not free. Once you know what your antagonist needs to do in a story, then it's a lot easier to pose the question to yourself of 'okay, why would someone do that?'

Villains often reflect an opposite or warped view of the values and motivations that your protagonist has. They mirror or foil your main character. So, your antagonist's motivation will often be either opposite to the protagonist (e.g, your protagonist is motivated by selflessness, so your antagonist is motivated by selfishness in some way) or they will be the same motivation or value gone twisted (e.g. we both have people we love who we would do anything to protect...it's the villains way of acting on that motivation that makes them the villain, not the motivation.)

Of course, you can not have your antagonist + protagonist connected in this way. This is often the case if the source of conflict in your story is not another actual character or if you have a more generic villain. Lots of great stories have generic villains. It typically just means the villain is not a focus. It might be, like, about the friendships made in the journey instead.

Motivations:

I find it helpful to think of all my characters having two motivations.

The external story-specific motivation. This is whatever the antagonist is trying to achieve in your particular story and where things like genre and superpowers etc come into play.

The internal motivation that is more universal. The internal motivation is, while still specific to the character, the driving emotions and values. With a villain, that is often hatred or fear or lust for power because they're villains, but as noted earlier it can be a twisted form of love, or a strong sense of an injustice committed against them. This shapes the external motivation (e.g. 'lust for power = I want the throne, 'fear' = I'm going to kill or belittle or control what scares me so I don't have to feel scared anymore', justice might equal revenge or gaining power to ensure that a wrong is corrected. ) It could also be a bias or a prejudice that they're raised on driving them, that they genuinely believe in. Lots of possibilities!

I think this is true of people as well. We have our foundational core beliefs and desires (to be loved, to succeed, to be accepted whatever) and then we have the things we try to get in the real world to meet those needs (whether they really will or not).

Either way, it's the second one that comes into play with the slow descent into villainy and the villain thinking that they're doing the right thing until the end. Because, initially, their heart genuinely is not in a villainous place. They may actually be doing the right thing at the start. And then bad things happen. They are changed by the journey. They are a protagonist gone tragic.

We all experience emotions that can drive us to behave poorly; the desire for revenge or recognition, to ensure that the people we care about are safe, to get money so that we can provide for ourselves and others etc. None of us are without prejudice or privilege. Those things do not make you a villain, but they can be an excellent starting place for one.

Think about times when you've messed up. A villain is often an exaggerated version of that. You start pushing your own boundaries because there is something you really want/need and, depending on how far you push that...do you feel like you can still go back? Or do you feel like you might as well finish it after everything. At what point do you breathe for air, look up at what you've done, and go shit.

That's the villain who realises way too late that they're the villain.

Final note: I've been using antagonist and villain pretty interchangeably here...but they have slightly different connotations. Your antagonist does not have to be a villain to be effective. They just have to be an obstacle to the protagonist. E.g. if two people are going for the same dream job or trying to win a competition, the other competitors are antagonists to a certain extent, but that doesn't mean they're villainous or bad people. Whether you have an outright villain will depend on your story.

I hope this helps!

Some going further questions to take with you.

Is your villain trying to stop your protagonist from reaching their goal? Or is your protagonist trying to stop the antagonist from reaching their goal?

How does the villain's external goal in the story reflect the inner need? Note. They are aware of their external goal. Most people are not aware of the inner goal in the same way.

Do you know what you want your stories themes to be? (This doesn't have to be complicated and it's fine if you don't, that's what editing is for). Your protagonist and antagonist often weigh in on these themes. For example, your antagonist might be a path the protagonist could have gone down, if they made a different choice or something happened differently in their past.

#villains #antagonist #writing advice #writing tips #writing talk #writing villains #writing tip #writing help #character creation #character building

[reddpenn]

Your whole rock collection is a slay. Show me some funky pieces you haven't been asked about yet!!!!

Here’s a rock I’ve been dying to talk about! This little guy is orthoclase feldspar! You might be familiar with the feldspar family, as it contains gemstones such as sunstone, moonstone, labradorite, and amazonite. What’s really, really interesting about this piece of feldspar is its shape. This cool formation is called a Carlsbad Twin. Let me tell you about it!

Feldspar crystals often form as flat-topped, six-sided prisms which are strongly skewed sideways. Here’s an example of another feldspar in my collection, amazonite, which shows off this crystal habit really clearly!

The two crystals in my piece of orthoclase are making that common feldspar shape! But you’ve probably also noticed how they appear to be mirror images of each other, and also growing through each other.

That’s Carlsbad twinning!! It’s a type of penetration twinning, which means the crystals appear to be penetrating or passing through each other. But looks can be deceiving; what's ACTUALLY happening here is much cooler. These crystals are conjoined twins! One hasn’t penetrated the other; they’re actually sharing some of their molecules like human conjoined twins might share organs.

This can happen because of the shape of feldspar’s crystal lattice - the orderly arrangement of its molecules.

The crystal lattice won't match up perfectly throughout the entire structure, but it WILL match up right along the C axis, where we flipped it. Along this line the grid of molecules aligns, and our twin crystals can share them. The place where lattice points are shared is called the composition surface.

Simply put, molecules don’t know what shape they’re making on a macro level. The shapes they make are by complete accident, because that just happens to be what shape you get when you arrange molecules in that kind of grid. The only thing the molecules know is how they can connect to other molecules. It doesn’t matter to them which direction the crystal is growing in, or which direction the crystal lattice is facing. If they can connect up in a way that completely flips the crystal lattice, well... they don't know they're doing that! They're just doing what molecules do!

And that’s how you get Carlsbad Twins!

#red pen has cool rocks #rock collecting #orthoclase #feldspar #carlsbad twin #i feel like i'm explaining this badly #because crystal twinning is really complicated #and i'm trying very hard to simplify it #and i don't think i'm succeeding #talkin' bout rocks

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Mino

Debut: Tetris

Tetris is all about blocks! You know that! Did you know that those blocks are called Tetriminos? Maybe you did! Geometrically, they are tetrominoes, shapes formed from four squares connected at the edges. "Tetrimino" is the official spelling of the ones used in Tetris specifically, which is a little confusing, but it's ok. Don't worry about it unless you are making your own game about tetrominoes! If you do that, be careful.

But what about the little blocks that make up the Tetrimino? These are geometrically called monominoes, but in Tetris, they are simply Minos! Humble little things. The game is named after Four, so what place does a measly One have?

If you ask me, they have all the place, because they are all over the place! There are no Tetriminos without Minos. Together, Minos are powerful, some of the most iconic and recognizable shape clusters in the world! Even in the form of a plush, The Tetris Company almost ALWAYS ensures that the individual Minos are visible. It is a part of the Tetriminos' designs at this point! The only exception I can think of is in situations unable to use their distinct colors, where other design factors are used to distinguish each. In this case, all but the I Tetrimino have their Minos visible, while I is just a solid color. Come on now, I. The most universally beloved Tetrimino, and you can't show some appreciation for the little guys who made you who you are? Sheesh!

While yes, Minos are a bit overlooked, they do indeed get the spotlight every once in a while! In game modes with items, you can expect that there will be one that turns all of your pieces into Minos, allowing you to instantly fill in gaps wherever you like. They are not particularly powerful, only able to clear one line at a time, but they ARE very convenient and easy to use!

Tetris Friends, my dearly beloved and departed Tetris Friends, uses Minos as the base for most of its avatars! I have already talked about these specifically, but I just want to point out these VERY default ones, each a piece of one of the classic Tetriminos, based on color... until the end, where we get what appears to be a Domesticated Mammal Mino! What are the implications of this? Have members of an intelligent species selectively bred the most docile of Minos together? Do Minos reproduce? Am I way off the mark, and is this Mino actually made of cookies and cream ice cream?

Finally, the reason I've been thinking of Minos in the first place! Here is a photo of the Tetris board game, with a single gray square in the Matrix. That's right! A Mino! In my opinion, this game is the most special Minos have ever felt. In this version, Tetriminos are dropped straight down into columns in the Matrix, and so they aren't as maneuverable as virtual ones. They can't be rotated while falling, and can't be slid into place to fill in any little notches.

This is where Minos come in! They are a sort of compensation for the lack of extra control, and can be placed to fill in extra space before dropping a Tetrimino. This is especially useful if you start with a Z or S block, since in this game, dropping one on a flat surface would leave a space no matter what! With a Mino, you can make a nice little ledge for your block to land neatly on.

This game's use of Minos really stood out to me! They're a major gameplay mechanic, they are explicitly named in the instruction manual, and, most importantly, they get their own PIECES. Physical, officially licensed, single Mino objects! They even get their very own color! A humble gray, not flashy like the rest, but distinct among all the others, and practical. A gray not to indicate a lack of interesting qualities, but instead, great potential!

There is no "official art" for Mino, so I just made the post's top image by editing some official Tetrimino art. Also, I have distinct memory of SOME official Tetris game, possibly Tetris Friends, referring to them as Tetrimonos. Does anyone else remember this? Please tell me if you do!

With that, we have reached the end of this post. But this is not the end of my fascination with Minos. In a way, it's only the beginning. In my Mino research, I have discovered some truly incredible things. Look forward to reading about them next week in Minos post part 2!

#mino #tetrimino #tetromino #monomino #tetris #tetris friends #not mario #funky friday #mod chikako

[lakesbian]

i was pondering some Thoughts about how people sometimes refer to worm as a "found family" story (& how this is sometimes mocked), how in-text alec explicitly says that the undersiders are the closest thing rachel has to family, how taylor tells them "you're my family, in a way," how the found family trope works in general, etc.

access to financial support, housing, medical care, And So On, is primarily attached to the institution of the family. the material necessities provided by membership to a nuclear family are why it's so common for people to reconcile with or keep in touch with family members they wouldn't if there was no material value attached to that relationship. the cultural prioritization of the nuclear family is how we get people offering "well, they're family" as an explanation for remaining associated with someone they wouldn't otherwise care about (or would even actively be trying to escape from, but this post is more about just Social Incompatibility in families than the outright abuse that the structure enables), with the expectation that the explanation is considered to make inherent sense.

aside from the found family trope demonstrating a lack of imagination about non-familial ways important relationships can take shape/demonstrating an inability to see relationships as truly important or deep unless they mimic the nuclear family, i think a lot of what appeals about the found family trope is a character dynamic that provides the same support, security, and undying love/depth of connection that the idealized nuclear family is purported to--and that does so as an escape from and superior replacement to the original blood family.

and what's interesting about the undersiders is that they're extremely not that. they're terrible at communicating. many of them don't get on with each other very well. they're oftentimes even actively shitty to each other: everyone but taylor towards rachel, brian towards alec (and aisha, but she's actually related to him), taylor towards alec and aisha. but there's still repeated in-text acknowledgement of a supposed familial dynamic between them! i think they're a "found family" in the sense that their group imitates the general role of the nuclear family--a small unit of people who (are supposed to) function as each other's fundamental supports in a world that, at large, does not care about any individual member, and who (are supposed to) do so regardless of any internal conflicts or lack of compatibility.

like, this is not a particularly articulate analysis of the nuclear family Whatsoever, but i don't think it's inaccurate to say that the compelling thing about the undersiders is that they are a "found family," but specifically in the sense that a lot of their dysfunctions are reminiscent of those found in typical, real-life familial bonds--people who wouldn't necessarily be getting along otherwise, or are even actively sorta bad for each other, forming very deep & intimate connections simply because they're materially forced to spend a lot of time together and have each others backs when there's no guarantee anyone else will.

for example: alec and aisha call taylor + brian 'team mom and dad' in a mocking manner not to indicate that they're kind/caring, but to indicate that they're being condescending micro-managing assholes...who aisha and alec are going to unquestionably listen to anyway, because they're a team, right? and you have to listen to your team leaders. i am onto an Observation here i think. deeply compelled by the idea of a ""found family"" where all of the similarities to an actual nuclear family are, despite being what drives the intimacy, also blatantly fucking dysfunctional

#worm spoilers #parahumans #wormblr #ive connected the dots. you havent connected shit

[jeongin-lvr]

ᵎ　🍶　⊹ hickeys, han jisung for

ᝰ✧ 𝗐𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀！ 𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗃𝗂， 𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 （𝗉𝗅𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾’𝗌 𝗌𝗈 𝗆𝗎𝖼𝗁）， 𝖻𝖺𝗍𝗁𝗋𝗈𝗈𝗆 𝗌𝖾𝗑， 𝖽𝖾𝗀𝗋𝖺𝖽𝗂𝗇𝗀 （𝖺 𝗅𝗈𝗍）， 𝗉𝗋𝖺𝗂𝗌𝖾 （𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾）， 𝗆𝗂𝗋𝗋𝗈𝗋𝗌， 𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖺𝖻𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗁𝖾𝖽 𝗋𝖾𝗅𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌𝗁𝗂𝗉， 𝗌𝗈𝗋𝗍 𝗈𝖿 𝖺 𝗌𝗅𝗈𝗐 𝖻𝗎𝗋𝗇 𝖾𝗑𝖼𝖾𝗉𝗍 𝗆𝗈𝗌𝗍 𝗈𝖿 𝗂𝗍 𝗂𝗌 𝗃𝗎𝗌𝗍 𝖧𝖺𝗇 𝖻𝖾𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖺 𝗉𝖾𝗋𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝖾𝖺𝗌𝖾， 𝗋𝗈𝗎𝗀𝗁 𝗌𝖾𝗑， 𝗎𝗇𝖾𝖽𝗂𝗍𝖾𝖽．

[ 3841 words ] ✩ [ do not repost ] ✩ [ 𝗆．𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍 ]

𝗜 𝗕𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗞𝗘𝗗 myself awake, almost instantly reaching an arm out to my side and patting the soft surface of the bed in search for something. But there was nothing- or no one there. At the lack of him being by my side I finally opened my eyes, scanning the dull room for any sign of life. The bathroom door just across the bed, parallel to my body, was closed and the soft twinkling of running water could be heard from the shower.

I hummed, sitting upright and rubbing my eyes as my heart calmed down knowing that my boyfriend was just in the bathroom.

I pulled his shirt over my knees, scooting into a tight ball of warmth while my eyes readjusted to the room around me. There was marks on my inner thighs, blotches of blue and red, some teeth marks, some obvious crescents from nails. I untucked my legs and began to scan them, running the soft pads of my fingers across the skin.

They stung a bit, so I hissed at the contact. My hair was matted with disgruntled sweat, I'm sure I smelled gross too. And there was a shake in my thighs, a bruise on my arm, and a red mark burned into the shape of harsh fingers on my neck.

I lurked up from the bed to get a better look in the standing mirror at the corner of the room. I saw a mess, bloodied mascara dried down my cheeks and my hair twisting messily.

I gasped slightly, recalling why I looked this way. What had really happened? He did.

Then the bathroom unlocked with a click, making me turn from the mirror. I pulled the edge of my (his) shirt down, hiding my bare ass and shyly turning my back toward the mirror.

Jisung looked from the bed then to where I stood, a small and cute smile on his lips. His hair was damp and pressed to his forehead in messy frays. But the best part of how he looked was the grey sweatpants that hung from his hips so teasingly, making me long for what was underneath. His bare torso was on full display, droplets of water dripped from his hair onto his abs, only adding to the lustful thoughts in my brain.

My eyes snapped back to his eyes when I heard him chuckle, "You're up, baby."

He sauntered over with a grin as I turned my gaze back to the reflection across from me; he wrapped his strong arms around my body, feeling every bit of it in his hands. He hugged my shoulders, also gazing at my reflection with a look of pride.

"Look how pretty you look with all my marks on you," He hummed in my ear, bare chest pressing into my back. His damp hair tickled my cheeks, his lips connecting to my neck as he began to form another hickey right there.

I groaned, his lips giving me flashbacks of the night before, "Ji, I look like I was beat up."

He chuckled, pulling his head back to admire the work of blue and purple spots on my neck. Jisung was proud of what he did to you, he loved the idea of marking. Seeing everywhere his lips once were, or his hands. He lifted the edge of my shirt up, seeing the finger shaped bruise marks on my full hips.

He gawked, cracking a teasing smile, "They're just proof of how good I fucked you last night baby." I caught his eye in the mirror, he paused and stared back firmly. A smirk creeping on his lips before he licked them with his shimmering saliva.

"People are going to thing I was attacked by a bear," I exaggerated, twisting my body around so that my chest was flush with his. Jisung glanced down at me through his thick damp strands of hair. His hands slithered to my butt, patting gently before giving it a harsh squeeze.

I yelped, surprised by his action before I smacked his arm away. But he let them rest there, teasingly chuckling before bending forward, kissing my lips so passionately I thought my lips would fall off. He nibbled at my bottom lip, humming into the kiss and letting me hear those low breathy groans he always gave me whenever we kissed.

"No, everyone gonna think you have a boyfriend who knows how to fuck you right." Jisung played along, breaking the kiss and breathing down on my face with a deep sigh of content. He glanced into the mirror again, lifting the back of my shirt and getting a clear view of my bare ass.

"Ji..."

"Fuck, baby, look at this ass," He practically groaned out, eyeing it in the mirror as his hands kneaded at the fat like it was bread dough. I blushed like crazy, hurrying my head in his chest before grumbling in embarrassed mumbles.

"I might just have to fuck you again," Jisung bitterly spoke, as if it was a problem. And to him it was, he thought that it was a crime to look as good as you. He was so deeply, so madly in love with you and everything you did. He couldn't handle it. Seeing you half naked with his marks all over your body was enough to make him long for the feeling of you on his dick once again.

I dragged my hand down his torso, letting my fingers rest in the band of his sweatpants, fingers delicately resting there while he fondled my ass with such intrigue. His face screamed how desperate he was, though not pleading with words, his eyes were soft and begging.

Then suddenly I felt his two fingers glide down to my cunt, feeling the wetness I was collecting just from his powerful words.

"Looks like you want me to fuck you too," Jisung teased, pulling his hands up and showing the wetness, "Open your mouth, bubs."

I did so, blushing at his cute nickname for me. Jisung was always about nicknames, finding new ones to call me every single day. Though his main two were 'baby' and 'honey', he spoke as if I were the most precious thing ever.

Which completely juxtaposed the way he was speaking now. So lewdly, so harshly, liking the forcefulness of his words.

I hesitantly widened my jaw, locking eyes with the handsome man above me. Jisung slipped his wet fingers in my mouth, "Suck."

I wrapped my mouth around his fingers, struggling to hold eye contact as his brown, beautiful eyes bore into me with such intensity. He remained unblinking, pupils dilating by the second as my tongue licked his fingers clean of my own juices. His fingers were hot and salty, matching the air around us. It was steamy, and I felt like I would suffocate from how sensual everything felt.

Yet my fingers slipped into the top of his sweatpants, teasingly prodding at the loose boxers he wore.

Jisung gave a chuckle, glancing down at how desperate my hands movements were.

"You want it that bad baby?" Jisung caressed the side of my face, taking his fingers out of my mouth and admiring the drool that pooled in the corners of mine, "Here I thought I was the desperate one."

I nodded meekly, using my other hand to feel the skin of his upper back. It was rough with scratches and wounds from my own infliction. I gasped slightly, meanwhile Jisung hissed at the stinging reminder of the wounds on his back.

"Looks like you marked me too," Jisung's hands found my hair, gently tugging it to the side so my head left a spot of my neck exposed. Then he latched his lips there, mumbling words against my skin that I couldn't understand over the feeling of his intoxicating kisses. He went in a motion, up and down my throat with breathy moans to fill the silence.

"You're so fucking hot like this," Jisung groaned out, my fingertips gliding down his clothed cock and palming him sweetly through the thin fabric.

My eyes fluttered shut, shallow and short reminders of his lips and where they traveled the night before. Paired with those memories and the way he looked right now, alongside his actions and words... I was fully invested and preparing for more. So, so much more.

"Do you think we should finish what we started last night?" He slid his hands past my ass and to my thighs, gripping them tightly before picking me up in one swift movement. I grunted, now face to face with the man who was making me feel so good. I intertwined my fingers with his damp locks, tugging them while the slight friction of my wet core and his erection grew.

I nodded, a wry smile playing on my lips while his fingers kept me upright against his build.

"You think you can handle it, Ji?" I only teased, earning a chuckle from the boy, his eyes darker than usual.

"Can you?" The way his eyes flickered with passion when he questioned me made me pause, wondering what exactly he has planned for the two of us.

"You're so quiet now," Jisung began to walk, not toward the comfortable bed but toward the bathroom. It emitted a hot steam from his shower, the smell and feeling was stuffy, everything damp and wet from him, "Don't have much to say or are you waiting for me to fill you up so I can hear those moans?"

"Stop teasing me!" I pouted, burying my head in his bare shoulder as he plopped me down onto the shockingly cold bathroom counter, my ass right beside the sink.

"Stop being so teasable," Jisung defended with a crooked smirk, wrapping two arms on either side of me and trapping me there. He stood between my thighs, effortlessly charming me with his cute ass smile and softly lidded eyes.

"Are you gonna fuck me or not?" I huffed out, seeing how hard he was through the thickness of his sweats. Rubbing my thighs together in desperation, I wrapped me arms around his shoulders, doing my best to not sound desperate. I don't think that worked because Jisung chuckled dryly, glancing down at my plump thighs and the inflictions on the skin.

"No, I don't think I will," Jisung leaned forward on his hands, teasing me with his lips just barely pressed to mine, less than a milimeter between them, "I'll have my fun."

I watched as his eyes glazed down my face, then my body, it made my brain spin so intensely I thought it'd explode.

Meanwhile, Jisung couldn't stop eyeing those marks all over your body. From head to toe there was no place on your body he didn't want to mark. When he looked at your face he wants to kiss it until his lips were puffy and swollen, your thighs were perfect canvas for his lips. He wanted you in every way possible.

He looked up again, finally meeting my eyes with his signature taunting smirk. He bent forward with that same smirk never faltering before kissing me so slow, hauntingly slow. Our lips kneaded together slowly, his strong hands grabbing my thighs as the kiss sped up, more passion being poured into it moment by moment.

Jisung disconnected our lips, making me whine and pull him back in by his broad shoulders.

"No more teasing," I begged, wanting every part of him to be pressed into my body. He kept his hands still and strong around me, giving me no advantage point.

"Why, baby?" Jisung asked, ghosting my lips with his as my breath hitched in nervousness.

"B-because Ji!"

"Hm, maybe I'll stop teasing if you tell me what you want, baby," Jisung but his lips, tilting his head before kissing me again slowly, edging me onward while slipping my thighs wide.

I pouted, annoyed that he was playing coy with me, "You know what I want."

"Say it again, baby," He connected his lips to my neck, feathering the skin there tenderly as desperate breathy whined left my jaw.

"Need you... so bad," My hands entangled with his hair, tugging the strands and pulling his face impossibly closer, "Need you all over me... please, Sungie," The new nickname caught him off guard, his heart beat skipped a moment, his face red. Good thing his face was hidden in your neck or he would've been screwed.

Jisung pulled back, placing his hand firmly at the back of my neck and pushing me forcefully against his lips, teeth almost clashing from the pure intensity of the moment. His other hand worked to undo his sweats, which was a decently quick process.

He detached his lips again, my hands on his shoulders while I watched him take out his dripping cock, awe struck by the sight.

He gave it a short pump, aligning our sexes as I adjusted my body to be sitting at the edge of the counter, "You know what I liked about bathrooms, honey?"

I had been bracing for penetration and his words caught me off guard; his tip still toyed with my hole, sliding throw the thick wetness of my folds.

I cocked my head, needy and in desperate need of release.

"Mirrors."

My eyes met my reflection in the mirror just behind his head; it was connected to the shower, just above the towel rack. Then my eyes darted to the mirror behind me, just above the sink. And he was right. Mirrors.

A small tingle enveloped my stomach as his fingers pried my thighs apart until he had a clear shot at my cunt.

"Now I can see you pretty face from all angles," Jisung chuckled, grabbing my wrist, "Put it in, sweetheart." A shiver consumed my spine, but my hand shook quickly before I reached down to his flawlessly engorged cock, pulling our sexes closer until his tip was prodded into my entrance.

He let out a low huff of air that quickly turned into a satisfied moan the more I pushed our bodies together.

And soon enough our hips met, I pushed myself to the edge of the porcelain countertops.

The stretch was so lovely, I tried to keep my eyes wide, I tried to maintain that intimate eye contact. But his gaze was stern, hard, and unnerving. He wouldn't look away as he gripped my hips and slowly started to rock in and out at a stupidly slow pace.

His hands gripped my hips, and his nails burned crescent scars into my skin. Jisung let out those low, perfectly pitched groans into my ear, syncing his movements with mine.

My eyes fluttered shut, "R-right there... don't stop, please!" My hands clawed hungrily at his back, probably reopening those scratches that lined his upper back. I held my mouth open as breathy whined filled the air, Jisung continued to sensually drag his cock against my walls, purposefully taking it slow so I could feel all of him.

I felt like I was going dumb from the torturous slowness, "Harder- please, Sungie... please, please, please-"

Jisung snaked a hand up to my throat, fingers forcefully jerking my head up to hold my chin to his face. He scoffed, "Shut the fuck up."

I moaned, his pace growing harder and faster, hitting secret parts of me that were left previously undiscovered. He knew what made my head spin, he knew what to say to make my pathetic dripping hole clench around him.

"You're gonna take it however I want you to take it, got it, babe?" Jisung watched with pride as I scrambled to nod, meanwhile he strategically sped up his thrusts. "I'm gonna make you my bitch." He forcefully squeezed my neck, restricting the flow before he attached his lips just below my jaw. I shook, eyes fluttering shut, only to be opened by the harsh bite he gave at the base of my neck, I'm sure it was enough to leave a mark of some kind.

After all, he liked to mark.

He snagged my wrist, pressing it into the mirror behind my head and pressing me into it.

"You're so fucking hot... can't get enough of your little sounds," Jisung admitted through lustful groans, pacing hurriedly hurdling toward a high that I knew would alter the chemistry in my brain; this moment was building up so slowly yet so perfectly, he knew how to edge me on without driving me insane.

I couldn't speak, his lips found solace at my jaw again as he nibbled at the same spot on my neck he'd admired in the mirror earlier. It burned from the night before, and his hot tongue drooling down my throat was enough to make my hole clench, anticipating my inevitable orgasm.

"F-fuck, Ji, I'm coming-" I gasped out, the air felt suffocating to breath, it burned my lungs but the feeling was so addicting.

He shifted his head to the other side of my neck, repeating the pattern of his lips on the other side of my neck.

To follow, Jisung began to rock in and out slower, hitting parts of me that felt heavenly. But he purposefully moved slow, so slow until I felt my orgasm slowly dwindle. I tightly grabbed at his shoulders, watching as he pulled back and stared down at where our bodies connected with a sadistic smirk on his lips.

I furrowed my brows at him, angry from the denial of my orgasm, "Let me cum! Please, want it so bad!" I scrambled and slurred my words in incomprehensible mumbles, my fingers scratching at any part of his body that was within my immediate reach.

He snatched my hands back and held each of my wrists pinned against the marble.

"Off the counter," He huskily breathed down my face, making me shiver. But I obliged, he pulled his soaked cock out and watched as I scurried down from the countertops, shaking in the thighs but ready for more.

"Now be a good girl and lean against it," Jisung began to push me forward, bending me at an angle over the counter until I was face to face with my reflection, "Now let's see how well you take it, yeah? I'm not holding back anymore."

I gasped when I felt his tip slide back in, then the rest of his hard dick. I watched my own face in the mirror, my face was practically pressed against it, my hot breath was coating the mirror in a foggy slick that began to drip from the condensation.

He didn't hold back at all, instantly he began to collide our hips back and forth, the lewd and wet slapping noises ensuing as he steadied his pace.

I couldn't stop myself as moan after moan left my lips, making my eyes water with salt and begin to be bombarded with at starry images that plagued my vision no matter where I looked.

"Look at you," Jisung bent forward as much as he could until our bodies were flush, his bare chest burned imprints into my sweat covered back. He grabbed my jaw, forcing my face to maintain eye contact with the reflection in the mirror, "Such a fucking slut. It's so hot, baby."

I gave him a tired yet satisfied moan, wanting to say more but unable to form the sentence without moans filling the gaps between words.

His cock dragged against my walls, he knew what parts of me to hit that sent me into a blissful oblivion. His lips pressed fiery marks into my shoulders and back, tongue lining parts of my body he hadn't yet found before. All the while his hand stayed forcefully pulling at the edge of my jaw, forcing me to watch everything he did in the bathroom mirror.

The sight was the prettiest thing. His hair fell beautifully past his eyes, blocking the view of them but I knew was they looked like. They were dark, arousing, and so unreadable. That's what made him so alluring.

And the way his body glistening in that slick of sweat under the dim lights of the bathroom; paired with the little left over foggy residue of his previous shower, made him seem godly.

He rammed his hips into me, "Nothing to say? What happened to all that big talk earlier, huh? So quiet now, let me hear it."

Jisung didn't hold back at all; his cock kissed my cervix, making my entire body twitch and twitch until I felt that undeniably heavenly sensation of my climax.

I finally opened my mouth to say something other that a relentless moan, "Wanna cum- let me cum, please, please! Let me cum..." jisung smirked at me in the mirror, enjoying my pleas.

"You wanna cum, baby?" Jisung bent to my ear, gripping my neck softly now, pressing his fingertips tightly into the sides of my aching and fry throat, "Cum with me. Gonna fill you up until you're begging me to stop."

I nodded, mewling while my orgasm took over and I was gripping the countertops, fighting with my eyes to stay open. Jisung helped me with that, forcing my face to the mirror until I dragged them wide.

I felt my own hot, lewd liquid slither down my inner thigh, snaking around my skin and pricking it with its overwhelming warmth.

And then Jisung tightly grasped my hair, jerking my head back and groaning in almost a loud, hazy growl, "Fuck- s'tight!"

With a few final thrusts, he unloaded into me, making me feel unspeakably full, my cunt throbbed as I felt his own cum join mine, filling me like a cup.

Jisung huffed into my ear, "Took it so well, bubs. Look how pretty you look all full of my cum." He tucked strands of hair behind my ear, not pulling out but praising me kindly while I panted and tried to regain my sense of self.

"Fuck... that was so good, Ji," I finally spoke in a soft mumble, my eyes finally falling shut.

"I know, baby." He kissed the side of my face, "You did so well." He grunted while slipping out of me, fully allowing our mix of fluids to seep out of me, dripping to the floor in thick clumps. I hissed as he pulled out, a stinging making my eyes flutter.

"We should bath," Jisung chuckled, concealing the fact that he was turned on again by the sight of the cum that leaked out of your hole.

"We smell like cum," He added again.

I nodded, standing but with great struggle as I teetered on the edge of my heels.

"Carry me," I held up my arms, making grabby hands at the taller boy, "Can't walk. Your fault."

He rolled his eyes but did as I asked, "You're lucky I love you so much."

#oneshot #stray kids #what is happening #writing #skz imagines #skz #skz x reader #skz han #skz smut #skz fluff #skz fanfic #skz oneshots #han jisung #han x reader #skz han x reader #skz scenarios #hyunjin #skz felix #skz hyunjin #skz stay

[sokosmic]

Astro Observations for

Leo Rising...

(Will add notes as I have time and think of more)

House placements based on Whole Signs

🌤️ Heart-shaped faces/heads. Hair! Wide smiles. Fair skinned or come from a lineage of fair skinned people. Confident persona with big gestures. Leads with heart...wears heart on sleeves.

🌤️ They aren't self-centered or the attention seekers they may get painted. With a (Libra 3H) they're mindset and mode of communication is centered around building relationships. They desire fairness and harmony when connecting with others and often go out of their way to please people when making those connections.

🌤️ This often appears contradictory to the way they behave when actually in a relationship. With an (Aquarius 7H), they may behave aloof and distant. But that isn't necessarily the case. Aquarius here may cause the native to desire freedom from the constraints of a traditional relationship. These individuals may prefer relationships and partnerships that are unconventional and go against the norm...requiring changes that bring excitement.

🌤️ In their (Cancer 12H) there is a strong desire to nurture their spirituality and their connection to the collective. While it may not be evident based on their house of relationships (Aquarius 7H), this really does go hand-in-hand because Aquarians are humanitarians. (Cancer 12H) also indicates psychic abilities.

🌤️ Although it may come across cold, these folks work hard and give a lot. They are no strangers to hunkering down and getting sh¡t done (Capricorn 6H). There may also be knee, ankle, or general bone issues that arise from this placement.

🌤️ On the same note...having a (Virgo 2H) lends to a very meticulous way of acquiring their needs. These folks tend to be pretty business savvy and have a very admirable work ethic and way of obtaining money. These are the people at work who just seem to know how to organize and categorize things for efficiency.

🌤️ There may have been some sort of trauma experienced in the early home life (Scorpio 4H). Secrets and things hidden or swept under the rug is very likely in the family. May come from a lineage of women with psychic abilities or occult practices. Lots of intense and transformational experiences derive from this placement.

🌤️ Depending on placements in the natal chart, we typically see this show up in their (Leo 1H) as a fierce loyalty toward becoming their best selves. There is a natural expression of confidence, courage, and creativity that they exude. Just like the Sun, people can't help but to see them.

🌤️ We also see this come thru in their (Taurus 10H), where here there is a natural ability and expression of beauty and making things aesthetically pleasing. This is usually specific to their career and public image. Here we may find them work methodically in fields such as interior design, jewelry making/design, or a form of physical labor related to beauty or creating beautiful things, such as wood working, pottery, or glass making.

🌤️ Unless there are planets in the natal that restrict it, these beautiful people are incredibly social (Gemini 11H), and often find themselves with lots of friends and associates. They tend to be leaders among groups they are involved. These are also people who create groups or organizations that are geared toward sharing information...think Facebook and other social media platforms.

🌤️ And they enjoy it! Running those groups or being an admin or moderator is something they do as a hobby. This is rooted in that (Gemini 11H) where they really enjoy sharing all the knowledge they gather through their social connections, personal research and travels (Sagittarius 5H). And people love them because they are able to convey messages with their wit and charm. These folks are funny and flirty by nature.

🌤️ Having a (Pisces 8H) grants these individuals with great intuitive gifts. It is also makes these natives quite empathetic towards the dark, shadow aspects of others. They often possess a natural tendency towards healing themselves and others with spiritual practices that aren't widely accepted or recognized.

🌤️ But what society thinks is the least of these individuals' concern. Their overview of the world is filtered through the eyes of Self for these people (Aries 9H). Their philosophies are geared toward independent thinking, carving one's own path, fighting for what is fair and just, and championing for the underdogs (Aries 9H + Libra 3H).

#astro observations #leo rising #leo 1st house #virgo 2nd house #libra 3rd house #scorpio 4th house #sagittarius 5th house #capricorn 6th house #aquarius 7th house #pisces 8th house #aries 9th house #taurus 10th house #gemini 11th house #cancer 12th house #rising signs #leo ascendant #sokosmic #mykosmiclife #astrology #astrologist #zodiac

[amoonsong]

Astro Observations

the way I understand signs themselves is based on the way the rising is set up. for example, Pisces risings dress with their mood because they have a Cancer 5th house or Sagittarius risings are super outspoken about their beliefs because they have a Leo 9th house meaning theyre prideful and strong about their opinions. Or, Scorpios are really good at sex because they have a mercury-ruled 8th house, and mercury rules over little details. IDK if this is a thing honestly I just found that it works for me.

Pisces can be very child-like which I feel leads them to be open and just not care about people's opinions. I say this because Neptune is about dreams and delusions and if you think of children, they embody just that. They're very naive and open, lack of a filter (which i feel can be especially true for Pisces with Aries mercury), have delusions, and are dreamy. If you ask a child their dream job and they say a response completely unaffected by capitalism or society. Children are born with the energy of love and Pisces embodies that, I feel that that is a HUGE Pisces trait. 

Speaking of this I feel like pisces venus natives, maybe risings, tend to be very self-sacrificing in relationships because that's just who they are in general but they can become very nit-picky and particular about the people with who they share that with after a while if affected by unrequited love, manipulation, just bad relationships in general. I think this is because in derivative astrology they have a Virgo 7h and in relationships, they're already nit-picky and whatnot.

all fire signs (venus, rising, sun possibly mars) will all have some sort of dramatic hair or captivating hair. they tend to really prioritize it.

in synastry, if someone's planet falls into your first house using Placidus but the second house using whole sign, you might cherish them in some way shape, or form because they connect with you on a personal level. with the moon, you could value and depend on being emotional with them because yall can emotionally connect with one another. with venus you could value sharing possessions, watching movies, buying each other things, or simply loving each other because it caters to your personal needs and your self. with mercury, you could value talking to them because it's always stimulating and interesting, and with mars you could value passions, sex, being ambitious, or just seeing their rawness because, for you, it proves their devotion to you but with mars. this could be annoying/repulsive or pleasurable/hot to you.

Leo risings are very vivacious and the fun, the drama but once you really get to know them you'll see that they rarely speak about their family in any serious capacity because of their Scorpio 4th house. this could change if they have mercury or the sun there but even if they did they could be super selective about what they tell you unless they are very trusting of you, then they let all the secrets and truth about themselves spill. 

speaking of that, no matter how a Scorpio appears, they care about its reputation and they're prideful about it.

Virgo mars nag so fucking much omg. they just pick and nag until whatever goes their way or until they're satisfied and it's so annoying. I find this especially true if expecting the moon or if it's also the moon honestly.

“a friend to all is a friend to none” is about Pisces risings. very kind and social people due to their chameleon-like personality (Neptune / Jupiter), but it's very rare they actually find people they’re close to and I'm sure that's because of that Capricorn 11th house (Saturn putting restrictions on social groups) and Virgo 7th house (picky and critical about who they consider a real companion.) but it's weird because with Taurus/venus ruled third house can be an indicator of a people magnet and they're really good and charming socialists and very likable.

people might think that Pisces is a go-with-the-flow type of person (which they areeeee) but they have Taurus in the third house, so they have a very stubborn mind. I feel like it’ll be expressed more with people who actually have 3rd house placements or fire placements because they're more inclined to vocalize and stick to their opinions.

leo is not the only fame indicator, heres more:

pisces = jupiter co-ruler and jupiter is bigger than life and super abundant. neptunes co-ruler (which rules over entertainment, arts, cameras, etc) so theyre very photogenic, have that celebrity mystique, and very connected to the arts. not to mention, neptune is the higher octave of venus so they can be very beautiful or have a beauty people cant even comprehend.

aries = suns exaltation they easily get attention and theyre trendsetters its just super easy for them to get attention especially if theyre being themselves.

Sagittarius = ruled by Jupiter and natural ruler of the 9th house. Jupiter is super expansive, bigger than life itself so they have natural luck, opportunities, and various skill sets that will be known and recognized. Jupiter makes them shine just as bright as the sun, if not more. the 9th house is the house of other countries and travel, they can be globally known.

cancer: cancer is a luminary and a cardinal sign.. they work hard and they shine. easily recognized just like the moon, adored just like the moon, beautiful and admireable, just like the moon. lol. cancers put you in that same trance the moon puts u in. not to mention the 28° , the househould (4th house) name. like cancers are known and loved. ie: kim kardshian (28°) , ariana grande , oprah (28° , household name like if you dont know oprah id be shocked.) 

Venusians ♉️♎️♓️: beautiful lives or appearances that's very captivating. into the arts and they can be recognized for that. they can be superficial but we all are. They're not as shallow as people perceive, the only thing is I find that Venusians tend to be a lot more private than one would imagine, idk what that’s about. 

Pluto 10h: Pluto is just like Jupiter (in a way, not literally). it blows things out of proportion to the MAX and it's extreme as fuck. it can also have that larger-than-life trait and because it's in the 10th house, it’s how you're perceived and it's your status. the downside to this is when you're in the public you may always feel like you're walking a tight rope like often times than not, you're under scrutiny, people will have a love-hate relationship with you, and you're prone to be exposed in some way shape or form. on the plus side, you’re probably mysterious, hot, alluring, & have sex appeal so you have that whole celebrity mystique thing too.

#astrology #astro posts #astro placements #astrology observations #astrology notes #pisces #scorpio #pluto 10th house #venusian #taurus #cancer #fire signs #sagittarius

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Big Tech’s “attention rents”

Tomorrow (Nov 4), I'm keynoting the Hackaday Supercon in Pasadena, CA.

The thing is, any feed or search result is "algorithmic." "Just show me the things posted by people I follow in reverse-chronological order" is an algorithm. "Just show me products that have this SKU" is an algorithm. "Alphabetical sort" is an algorithm. "Random sort" is an algorithm.

Any process that involves more information than you can take in at a glance or digest in a moment needs some kind of sense-making. It needs to be put in some kind of order. There's always gonna be an algorithm.

But that's not what we mean by "the algorithm" (TM). When we talk about "the algorithm," we mean a system for ordering information that uses complex criteria that are not precisely known to us, and than can't be easily divined through an examination of the ordering.

There's an idea that a "good" algorithm is one that does not seek to deceive or harm us. When you search for a specific part number, you want exact matches for that search at the top of the results. It's fine if those results include third-party parts that are compatible with the part you're searching for, so long as they're clearly labeled. There's room for argument about how to order those results – do highly rated third-party parts go above the OEM part? How should the algorithm trade off price and quality?

It's hard to come up with an objective standard to resolve these fine-grained differences, but search technologists have tried. Think of Google: they have a patent on "long clicks." A "long click" is when you search for something and then don't search for it again for quite some time, the implication being that you've found what you were looking for. Google Search ads operate a "pay per click" model, and there's an argument that this aligns Google's ad division's interests with search quality: if the ad division only gets paid when you click a link, they will militate for placing ads that users want to click on.

Platforms are inextricably bound up in this algorithmic information sorting business. Platforms have emerged as the endemic form of internet-based business, which is ironic, because a platform is just an intermediary – a company that connects different groups to each other. The internet's great promise was "disintermediation" – getting rid of intermediaries. We did that, and then we got a whole bunch of new intermediaries.

Usually, those groups can be sorted into two buckets: "business customers" (drivers, merchants, advertisers, publishers, creative workers, etc) and "end users" (riders, shoppers, consumers, audiences, etc). Platforms also sometimes connect end users to each other: think of dating sites, or interest-based forums on Reddit. Either way, a platform's job is to make these connections, and that means platforms are always in the algorithm business.

Whether that's matching a driver and a rider, or an advertiser and a consumer, or a reader and a mix of content from social feeds they're subscribed to and other sources of information on the service, the platform has to make a call as to what you're going to see or do.

These choices are enormously consequential. In the theory of Surveillance Capitalism, these choices take on an almost supernatural quality, where "Big Data" can be used to guess your response to all the different ways of pitching an idea or product to you, in order to select the optimal pitch that bypasses your critical faculties and actually controls your actions, robbing you of "the right to a future tense."

I don't think much of this hypothesis. Every claim to mind control – from Rasputin to MK Ultra to neurolinguistic programming to pick-up artists – has turned out to be bullshit. Besides, you don't need to believe in mind control to explain the ways that algorithms shape our beliefs and actions. When a single company dominates the information landscape – say, when Google controls 90% of your searches – then Google's sorting can deprive you of access to information without you knowing it.

If every "locksmith" listed on Google Maps is a fake referral business, you might conclude that there are no more reputable storefront locksmiths in existence. What's more, this belief is a form of self-fulfilling prophecy: if Google Maps never shows anyone a real locksmith, all the real locksmiths will eventually go bust.

If you never see a social media update from a news source you follow, you might forget that the source exists, or assume they've gone under. If you see a flood of viral videos of smash-and-grab shoplifter gangs and never see a news story about wage theft, you might assume that the former is common and the latter is rare (in reality, shoplifting hasn't risen appreciably, while wage-theft is off the charts).

In the theory of Surveillance Capitalism, the algorithm was invented to make advertisers richer, and then went on to pervert the news (by incentivizing "clickbait") and finally destroyed our politics when its persuasive powers were hijacked by Steve Bannon, Cambridge Analytica, and QAnon grifters to turn millions of vulnerable people into swivel-eyed loons, racists and conspiratorialists.

As I've written, I think this theory gives the ad-tech sector both too much and too little credit, and draws an artificial line between ad-tech and other platform businesses that obscures the connection between all forms of platform decay, from Uber to HBO to Google Search to Twitter to Apple and beyond:

https://pluralistic.net/HowToDestroySurveillanceCapitalism

As a counter to Surveillance Capitalism, I've proposed a theory of platform decay called enshittification, which identifies how the market power of monopoly platforms, combined with the flexibility of digital tools, combined with regulatory capture, allows platforms to abuse both business-customers and end-users, by depriving them of alternatives, then "twiddling" the knobs that determine the rules of the platform without fearing sanction under privacy, labor or consumer protection law, and finally, blocking digital self-help measures like ad-blockers, alternative clients, scrapers, reverse engineering, jailbreaking, and other tech guerrilla warfare tactics:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/21/potemkin-ai/#hey-guys

One important distinction between Surveillance Capitalism and enshittification is that enshittification posits that the platform is bad for everyone. Surveillance Capitalism starts from the assumption that surveillance advertising is devastatingly effective (which explains how your racist Facebook uncles got turned into Jan 6 QAnons), and concludes that advertisers must be well-served by the surveillance system.

But advertisers – and other business customers – are very poorly served by platforms. Procter and Gamble reduced its annual surveillance advertising budget from $100m//year to $0/year and saw a 0% reduction in sales. The supposed laser-focused targeting and superhuman message refinement just don't work very well – first, because the tech companies are run by bullshitters whose marketing copy is nonsense, and second because these companies are monopolies who can abuse their customers without losing money.

The point of enshittification is to lock end-users to the platform, then use those locked-in users as bait for business customers, who will also become locked to the platform. Once everyone is holding everyone else hostage, the platform uses the flexibility of digital services to play a variety of algorithmic games to shift value from everyone to the business's shareholders. This flexibility is supercharged by the failure of regulators to enforce privacy, labor and consumer protection standards against the companies, and by these companies' ability to insist that regulators punish end-users, competitors, tinkerers and other third parties to mod, reverse, hack or jailbreak their products and services to block their abuse.

Enshittification needs The Algorithm. When Uber wants to steal from its drivers, it can just do an old-fashioned wage theft, but eventually it will face the music for that kind of scam:

https://apnews.com/article/uber-lyft-new-york-city-wage-theft-9ae3f629cf32d3f2fb6c39b8ffcc6cc6

The best way to steal from drivers is with algorithmic wage discrimination. That's when Uber offers occassional, selective drivers higher rates than it gives to drivers who are fully locked to its platform and take every ride the app offers. The less selective a driver becomes, the lower the premium the app offers goes, but if a driver starts refusing rides, the wage offer climbs again. This isn't the mind-control of Surveillance Capitalism, it's just fraud, shaving fractional pennies off your paycheck in the hopes that you won't notice. The goal is to get drivers to abandon the other side-hustles that allow them to be so choosy about when they drive Uber, and then, once the driver is fully committed, to crank the wage-dial down to the lowest possible setting:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/12/algorithmic-wage-discrimination/#fishers-of-men

This is the same game that Facebook played with publishers on the way to its enshittification: when Facebook began aggressively courting publishers, any short snippet republished from the publisher's website to a Facebook feed was likely to be recommended to large numbers of readers. Facebook offered publishers a vast traffic funnel that drove millions of readers to their sites.

But as publishers became more dependent on that traffic, Facebook's algorithm started downranking short excerpts in favor of medium-length ones, building slowly to fulltext Facebook posts that were fully substitutive for the publisher's own web offerings. Like Uber's wage algorithm, Facebook's recommendation engine played its targets like fish on a line.

When publishers responded to declining reach for short excerpts by stepping back from Facebook, Facebook goosed the traffic for their existing posts, sending fresh floods of readers to the publisher's site. When the publisher returned to Facebook, the algorithm once again set to coaxing the publishers into posting ever-larger fractions of their work to Facebook, until, finally, the publisher was totally locked into Facebook. Facebook then started charging publishers for "boosting" – not just to be included in algorithmic recommendations, but to reach their own subscribers.

Enshittification is modern, high-tech enabled, monopolistic form of rent seeking. Rent-seeking is a subtle and important idea from economics, one that is increasingly relevant to our modern economy. For economists, a "rent" is income you get from owning a "factor of production" – something that someone else needs to make or do something.

Rents are not "profits." Profit is income you get from making or doing something. Rent is income you get from owning something needed to make a profit. People who earn their income from rents are called rentiers. If you make your income from profits, you're a "capitalist."

Capitalists and rentiers are in irreconcilable combat with each other. A capitalist wants access to their factors of production at the lowest possible price, whereas rentiers want those prices to be as high as possible. A phone manufacturer wants to be able to make phones as cheaply as possible, while a patent-troll wants to own a patent that the phone manufacturer needs to license in order to make phones. The manufacturer is a capitalism, the troll is a rentier.

The troll might even decide that the best strategy for maximizing their rents is to exclusively license their patents to a single manufacturer and try to eliminate all other phones from the market. This will allow the chosen manufacturer to charge more and also allow the troll to get higher rents. Every capitalist except the chosen manufacturer loses. So do people who want to buy phones. Eventually, even the chosen manufacturer will lose, because the rentier can demand an ever-greater share of their profits in rent.

Digital technology enables all kinds of rent extraction. The more digitized an industry is, the more rent-seeking it becomes. Think of cars, which harvest your data, block third-party repair and parts, and force you to buy everything from acceleration to seat-heaters as a monthly subscription:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/24/rent-to-pwn/#kitt-is-a-demon

The cloud is especially prone to rent-seeking, as Yanis Varoufakis writes in his new book, Technofeudalism, where he explains how "cloudalists" have found ways to lock all kinds of productive enterprise into using cloud-based resources from which ever-increasing rents can be extracted:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/09/28/cloudalists/#cloud-capital

The endless malleability of digitization makes for endless variety in rent-seeking, and cataloging all the different forms of digital rent-extraction is a major project in this Age of Enshittification. "Algorithmic Attention Rents: A theory of digital platform market power," a new UCL Institute for Innovation and Public Purpose paper by Tim O'Reilly, Ilan Strauss and Mariana Mazzucato, pins down one of these forms:

https://www.ucl.ac.uk/bartlett/public-purpose/publications/2023/nov/algorithmic-attention-rents-theory-digital-platform-market-power

The "attention rents" referenced in the paper's title are bait-and-switch scams in which a platform deliberately enshittifies its recommendations, search results or feeds to show you things that are not the thing you asked to see, expect to see, or want to see. They don't do this out of sadism! The point is to extract rent – from you (wasted time, suboptimal outcomes) and from business customers (extracting rents for "boosting," jumbling good results in among scammy or low-quality results).

The authors cite several examples of these attention rents. Much of the paper is given over to Amazon's so-called "advertising" product, a $31b/year program that charges sellers to have their products placed above the items that Amazon's own search engine predicts you will want to buy:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/28/enshittification/#relentless-payola

This is a form of gladiatorial combat that pits sellers against each other, forcing them to surrender an ever-larger share of their profits in rent to Amazon for pride of place. Amazon uses a variety of deceptive labels ("Highly Rated – Sponsored") to get you to click on these products, but most of all, they rely two factors. First, Amazon has a long history of surfacing good results in response to queries, which makes buying whatever's at the top of a list a good bet. Second, there's just so many possible results that it takes a lot of work to sift through the probably-adequate stuff at the top of the listings and get to the actually-good stuff down below.

Amazon spent decades subsidizing its sellers' goods – an illegal practice known as "predatory pricing" that enforcers have increasingly turned a blind eye to since the Reagan administration. This has left it with few competitors:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/05/19/fake-it-till-you-make-it/#millennial-lifestyle-subsidy

The lack of competing retail outlets lets Amazon impose other rent-seeking conditions on its sellers. For example, Amazon has a "most favored nation" requirement that forces companies that raise their prices on Amazon to raise their prices everywhere else, which makes everything you buy more expensive, whether that's a Walmart, Target, a mom-and-pop store, or direct from the manufacturer:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/25/greedflation/#commissar-bezos

But everyone loses in this "two-sided market." Amazon used "junk ads" to juice its ad-revenue: these are ads that are objectively bad matches for your search, like showing you a Seattle Seahawks jersey in response to a search for LA Lakers merch:

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2023-11-02/amazon-boosted-junk-ads-hid-messages-with-signal-ftc-says

The more of these junk ads Amazon showed, the more revenue it got from sellers – and the more the person selling a Lakers jersey had to pay to show up at the top of your search, and the more they had to charge you to cover those ad expenses, and the more they had to charge for it everywhere else, too.

The authors describe this process as a transformation between "attention rents" (misdirecting your attention) to "pecuniary rents" (making money). That's important: despite decades of rhetoric about the "attention economy," attention isn't money. As I wrote in my enshittification essay:

You can't use attention as a medium of exchange. You can't use it as a store of value. You can't use it as a unit of account. Attention is like cryptocurrency: a worthless token that is only valuable to the extent that you can trick or coerce someone into parting with "fiat" currency in exchange for it. You have to "monetize" it – that is, you have to exchange the fake money for real money.

The authors come up with some clever techniques for quantifying the ways that this scam harms users. For example, they count the number of places that an advertised product rises in search results, relative to where it would show up in an "organic" search. These quantifications are instructive, but they're also a kind of subtweet at the judiciary.

In 2018, SCOTUS's ruling in American Express v Ohio changed antitrust law for two-sided markets by insisting that so long as one side of a two-sided market was better off as the result of anticompetitive actions, there was no antitrust violation:

https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=3346776

For platforms, that means that it's OK to screw over sellers, advertisers, performers and other business customers, so long as the end-users are better off: "Go ahead, cheat the Uber drivers, so long as you split the booty with Uber riders."

But in the absence of competition, regulation or self-help measures, platforms cheat everyone – that's the point of enshittification. The attention rents that Amazon's payola scheme extract from shoppers translate into higher prices, worse goods, and lower profits for platform sellers. In other words, Amazon's conduct is so sleazy that it even threads the infinitesimal needle that the Supremes created in American Express.

Here's another algorithmic pecuniary rent: Amazon figured out which of its major rivals used an automated price-matching algorithm, and then cataloged which products they had in common with those sellers. Then, under a program called Project Nessie, Amazon jacked up the prices of those products, knowing that as soon as they raised the prices on Amazon, the prices would go up everywhere else, so Amazon wouldn't lose customers to cheaper alternatives. That scam made Amazon at least a billion dollars:

https://gizmodo.com/ftc-alleges-amazon-used-price-gouging-algorithm-1850986303

This is a great example of how enshittification – rent-seeking on digital platforms – is different from analog rent-seeking. The speed and flexibility with which Amazon and its rivals altered their prices requires digitization. Digitization also let Amazon crank the price-gouging dial to zero whenever they worried that regulators were investigating the program.

So what do we do about it? After years of being made to look like fumblers and clowns by Big Tech, regulators and enforcers – and even lawmakers – have decided to get serious.

The neoliberal narrative of government helplessness and incompetence would have you believe that this will go nowhere. Governments aren't as powerful as giant corporations, and regulators aren't as smart as the supergeniuses of Big Tech. They don't stand a chance.

But that's a counsel of despair and a cheap trick. Weaker US governments have taken on stronger oligarchies and won – think of the defeat of JD Rockefeller and the breakup of Standard Oil in 1911. The people who pulled that off weren't wizards. They were just determined public servants, with political will behind them. There is a growing, forceful public will to end the rein of Big Tech, and there are some determined public servants surfing that will.

In this paper, the authors try to give those enforcers ammo to bring to court and to the public. For example, Amazon claims that its algorithm surfaces the products that make the public happy, without the need for competitive pressure to keep it sharp. But as the paper points out, the only successful new rival ecommerce platform – Tiktok – has found an audience for an entirely new category of goods: dupes, "lower-cost products that have the same or better features than higher cost branded products."

The authors also identify "dark patterns" that platforms use to trick users into consuming feeds that have a higher volume of things that the company profits from, and a lower volume of things that users want to see. For example, platforms routinely switch users from a "following" feed – consisting of things posted by people the user asked to hear from – with an algorithmic "For You" feed, filled with the things the company's shareholders wish the users had asked to see.

Calling this a "dark pattern" reveals just how hollow and self-aggrandizing that term is. "Dark pattern" usually means "fraud." If I ask to see posts from people I like, and you show me posts from people who'll pay you for my attention instead, that's not a sophisticated sleight of hand – it's just a scam. It's the social media equivalent of the eBay seller who sends you an iPhone box with a bunch of gravel inside it instead of an iPhone. Tech bros came up with "dark pattern" as a way of flattering themselves by draping themselves in the mantle of dopamine-hacking wizards, rather than unimaginative con-artists who use a computer to rip people off.

These For You algorithmic feeds aren't just a way to increase the load of sponsored posts in a feed – they're also part of the multi-sided ripoff of enshittified platforms. A For You feed allows platforms to trick publishers and performers into thinking that they are "good at the platform," which both convinces to optimize their production for that platform, and also turns them into Judas Goats who conspicuously brag about how great the platform is for people like them, which brings their peers in, too.

In Veena Dubal's essential paper on algorithmic wage discrimination, she describes how Uber drivers whom the algorithm has favored with (temporary) high per-ride rates brag on driver forums about their skill with the app, bringing in other drivers who blame their lower wages on their failure to "use the app right":

https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=4331080

As I wrote in my enshittification essay:

If you go down to the midway at your county fair, you'll spot some poor sucker walking around all day with a giant teddy bear that they won by throwing three balls in a peach basket.

The peach-basket is a rigged game. The carny can use a hidden switch to force the balls to bounce out of the basket. No one wins a giant teddy bear unless the carny wants them to win it. Why did the carny let the sucker win the giant teddy bear? So that he'd carry it around all day, convincing other suckers to put down five bucks for their chance to win one:

https://boingboing.net/2006/08/27/rigged-carny-game.html

The carny allocated a giant teddy bear to that poor sucker the way that platforms allocate surpluses to key performers – as a convincer in a "Big Store" con, a way to rope in other suckers who'll make content for the platform, anchoring themselves and their audiences to it.

Platform can't run the giant teddy-bear con unless there's a For You feed. Some platforms – like Tiktok – tempt users into a For You feed by making it as useful as possible, then salting it with doses of enshittification:

https://www.forbes.com/sites/emilybaker-white/2023/01/20/tiktoks-secret-heating-button-can-make-anyone-go-viral/

Other platforms use the (ugh) "dark pattern" of simply flipping your preference from a "following" feed to a "For You" feed. Either way, the platform can't let anyone keep the giant teddy-bear. Once you've tempted, say, sports bros into piling into the platform with the promise of millions of free eyeballs, you need to withdraw the algorithm's favor for their content so you can give it to, say, astrologers. Of course, the more locked-in the users are, the more shit you can pile into that feed without worrying about them going elsewhere, and the more giant teddy-bears you can give away to more business users so you can lock them in and start extracting rent.

For regulators, the possibility of a "good" algorithmic feed presents a serious challenge: when a feed is bad, how can a regulator tell if its low quality is due to the platform's incompetence at blocking spammers or guessing what users want, or whether it's because the platform is extracting rents?

The paper includes a suite of recommendations, including one that I really liked:

Regulators, working with cooperative industry players, would define reportable metrics based on those that are actually used by the platforms themselves to manage search, social media, e-commerce, and other algorithmic relevancy and recommendation engines.

In other words: find out how the companies themselves measure their performance. Find out what KPIs executives have to hit in order to earn their annual bonuses and use those to figure out what the company's performance is – ad load, ratio of organic clicks to ad clicks, average click-through on the first organic result, etc.

They also recommend some hard rules, like reserving a portion of the top of the screen for "organic" search results, and requiring exact matches to show up as the top result.

I've proposed something similar, applicable across multiple kinds of digital businesses: an end-to-end principle for online services. The end-to-end principle is as old as the internet, and it decrees that the role of an intermediary should be to deliver data from willing senders to willing receivers as quickly and reliably as possible. When we apply this principle to your ISP, we call it Net Neutrality. For services, E2E would mean that if I subscribed to your feed, the service would have a duty to deliver it to me. If I hoisted your email out of my spam folder, none of your future emails should land there. If I search for your product and there's an exact match, that should be the top result:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2023/04/platforms-decay-lets-put-users-first

One interesting wrinkle to framing platform degradation as a failure to connect willing senders and receivers is that it places a whole host of conduct within the regulatory remit of the FTC. Section 5 of the FTC Act contains a broad prohibition against "unfair and deceptive" practices:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/10/the-courage-to-govern/#whos-in-charge

That means that the FTC doesn't need any further authorization from Congress to enforce an end to end rule: they can simply propose and pass that rule, on the grounds that telling someone that you'll show them the feeds that they ask for and then not doing so is "unfair and deceptive."

Some of the other proposals in the paper also fit neatly into Section 5 powers, like a "sticky" feed preference. If I tell a service to show me a feed of the people I follow and they switch it to a For You feed, that's plainly unfair and deceptive.

All of this raises the question of what a post-Big-Tech feed would look like. In "How To Break Up Amazon" for The Sling, Peter Carstensen and Darren Bush sketch out some visions for this:

https://www.thesling.org/how-to-break-up-amazon/

They imagine a "condo" model for Amazon, where the sellers collectively own the Amazon storefront, a model similar to capacity rights on natural gas pipelines, or to patent pools. They see two different ways that search-result order could be determined in such a system:

"specific premium placement could go to those vendors that value the placement the most [with revenue] shared among the owners of the condo"

or

"leave it to owners themselves to create joint ventures to promote products"

Note that both of these proposals are compatible with an end-to-end rule and the other regulatory proposals in the paper. Indeed, all these policies are easier to enforce against weaker companies that can't afford to maintain the pretense that they are headquartered in some distant regulatory haven, or pay massive salaries to ex-regulators to work the refs on their behalf:

https://www.thesling.org/in-public-discourse-and-congress-revolvers-defend-amazons-monopoly/

The re-emergence of intermediaries on the internet after its initial rush of disintermediation tells us something important about how we relate to one another. Some authors might be up for directly selling books to their audiences, and some drivers might be up for creating their own taxi service, and some merchants might want to run their own storefronts, but there's plenty of people with something they want to offer us who don't have the will or skill to do it all. Not everyone wants to be a sysadmin, a security auditor, a payment processor, a software engineer, a CFO, a tax-preparer and everything else that goes into running a business. Some people just want to sell you a book. Or find a date. Or teach an online class.

Intermediation isn't intrinsically wicked. Intermediaries fall into pits of enshitffication and other forms of rent-seeking when they aren't disciplined by competitors, by regulators, or by their own users' ability to block their bad conduct (with ad-blockers, say, or other self-help measures). We need intermediaries, and intermediaries don't have to turn into rent-seeking feudal warlords. That only happens if we let it happen.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/11/03/subprime-attention-rent-crisis/#euthanize-rentiers

Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en

#pluralistic #rentiers #euthanize rentiers #subprime attention crisis #Mariana Mazzucato #tim oreilly #Ilan Strauss #scholarship #economics #two-sided markets #platform decay #algorithmic feeds #the algorithm tm #enshittification #monopoly #antitrust #section 5 #ftc act #ftc #amazon. google #big tech #attention economy #attention rents #pecuniary rents #consumer welfare #end-to-end principle #remedyfest #giant teddy bears #project nessie #end-to-end

[merakiui]

Your Yan Idia and his magical onahole is so amazing its so gooddd!!! But what if the magical onahole but with Azul and the tweels???

Zuzu using it as a comfort toy and fucking its precious hole with his rather big but tentacle-like octopus cock. Trying to sit still when mysterious phantom suckers are sucking on their puffy slit. trying not to cum when long slender fingers work your hole open, rubbing up and down so gently

OR OR!! Tweels know that its connected to their darling and fuck the onahole's holes so roughly. They do it when the reader is asleep and jolting them awake once two large mercocks were shoved into their pretty tight holes, in class when they're in a middle of a lesson or in random places.

Azul definitely uses it as a comfort toy, but he also uses it for practice! He does everything to the onahole that he wishes to do to you. He fucks into it in his octo-mer form just to work on being more confident in that form so that when (and if) he does get to fuck you with his tentacles he won't feel so insecure. He also wants to be perfectly skilled when he eats you out or scissors you open; he dreads looking so foolishly inexperienced when he actually gets to sleep with you, so he'll practice quite often. And of course he always, always cums lots inside. <3 he could go many rounds if he's particularly pent-up (he hate-fucks the onahole a lot because he's a jealous tako), so if he chooses to use it on a day or night when you're with friends... good luck. :)

Slimy eels... >:( they know exactly what they're doing when they fit both of their cocks inside just to see how much of them you can take at once. They definitely fight over the onahole sometimes, wrestling each other for first use with mean scowls and snapping jaws. Floyd doesn't want to fuck Jade's cum back inside you. He wants his chance to fill you up first, not settle for sloppy seconds!! And Jade doesn't want to share at this moment because he found a particularly phallic-shaped mushroom and wants to see how well you'll take it (which is an immediate no-go for Floyd; he is not fucking an onahole that's been fucked with a mushroom). Sometimes Jade just wants to drag things out and tease you so slowly, but Floyd is impatient and he wants to be inside you the minute he's freed his cock from the confines of his boxers. And there's only one onahole, so they're forced to either compromise and share or fight over it like starved eels.

The twins work together very well when they aren't actively strangling the other near death for use of the onahole. When they're functioning on the same horny brain cell, they actually plan some very devious schemes. Jade likes to talk with you, whether over tea or in the botanical gardens or even during a walk through campus, while Floyd's off with the onahole, slamming it onto his cock just so Jade can watch the breath get knocked out of your little lungs. He loves to see you squirm and if you let him (you will; peer pressure is so fun and Jade does it best) he'll have you bent over so he can see how your hole gapes and clenches around an invisible force (Floyd's dick). He'll force his way inside and the two of them fuck you sore and dumb.

Jade likes to use the onahole when you're spending time with a friend or if you're on a date. He may not seem it, but he has a nasty jealous streak. He's only willing to share you with Floyd, so the fact that his dearest darling would even think to spend time with others when he and Floyd are the best fits for you... You really like to hurt his poor heart. :( it's only fair he absolutely ruins your chances with anyone else, teasing you all throughout your date before finally, finally bottoming out just when you think anything special might happen on your date. After all, why settle for someone who is better off becoming fish food? Obviously Jade and Floyd are the ones meant for you; the way you squeeze Jade's dick so tightly indicates that you agree, even if not yet verbally.

#meraki thirsts #yandere twst #n/sfw #i will admit the trio were the first ones i thought of while writing the response to onahole idia... ;;;;; #actually this works so well for shy scummy incel azul #he breeds you in secret and you have no idea :) #or the twins pressuring you to get pregnant because they want children and their parents want it too #but when you tell them no they act like they understand and the matter is never spoken about again #they turn to the onahole determined to fuck it so many times you'll eventually be knocked up #and then when you come to them pregnant they can act like you cheated on them #but don't worry!! they still love you <3 just promise you'll marry them #and in nine months you'll see it was all a big misunderstanding because what a wonderful surprise #you were actually pregnant with their fry all along :D #orz they are the worst men aaaaaa i need octavinelle carnally T_T

[pessimisticpigeonsworld]

The ASOIAF fandom is so funny about discourse; both in topics and reactions. The other main fandom I frequent on Tumblr is Tolkien, and the difference is remarkable.

For instance, in the story of the Fall of Numenor, there's a story about the usurpation of a woman that leads to tragedy. I'm talking, of course, about Tar-Míriel. She was the rightful queen of Numenor, but was usurped by her cousin Ar-Pharazôn, who caused the destruction of Numenor.

There is not a single person in the Tolken fandom who argues that Ar-Pharazôn was in the right, was actually a good person, or that Tar-Míriel deserved to be usurped. Granted, the story isn't actually the same as that of the Dance, but the bare bones are pretty similar.

Tar-Míriel isn't a morally gray character like Rhaenyra, in fact we know very little about her, but the parts we do know are good. However, both Rhaenyra and Tar-Míriel were declared their fathers' heirs despite the existence of close male relatives. They were both usurped and ultimately killed (Míriel indirectly) by a male relative.

Ar-Pharazôn and Aegon II are both written as almost cartoonishly evil. They both were horrible rulers and warmongers. Their reigns caused massive tragedies; Aegon II and his faction caused the deaths of the dragons and Ar-Pharazôn's actions caused Iluvatar to destroy Numenor.

Now, I'm not saying that these two stories are meant to be connected or paralleled, they simple capture a similar story pattern rooted in history. My point is that the ASOIAF fandom has a major issue.

The greens are not secretly heroes, good people, or morally superior to the blacks in any way, shape, or form. The obsession of the ASOIAF fandom to turn them into more "sympathetic" characters is ridiculous. Fandoms like the Tolkien one are able to embrace a character being a villain without trying to turn them into a hero.

It's so frustrating because this obsession with making the greens into protagonists damages fandom discourse. It's turned the Dance into a cheap "choose your team" issue, rather than a story of the damage of misogyny, the patriarchy, and warring lords. The arguments over which team is right is absurd and creates a space were misogyny is fostered and encouraged (even some TB fans)

I know, a majority of my posts are complaining about TG and their stans, so I'm guilty of perpetuating the cycle. But there's a difference between analysis of a character and arguing with people's rotten takes and just reducing the story to team discourse; I try my best to avoid the latter.

I'm sure a large part of this issue can be traced to HOTD, but I think it's indicative of deeper problem in the fandom. People reduce the issues in the main books to "who's gonna take the throne" rather than actually addressing things. They're so comfortable spouting misogyny in regards to Daenerys and Arya. The ASOIAF fandom has deeper issues that are being exacerbated by the writing decisions of HOTD and, before that, GOT.

#asoiaf fandom #fandom critical #anti team green #anti hotd #anti got #tolkien #asoiaf #team black #anti team green stans #rhaenyra targaryen #anti rhaenyra antis #fandom misogyny #anti aegon ii targaryen #tar miriel #ar pharazon

[taeghi]

kim sunoo : the soulmate trope

"can i help you with something? or are you just stalking me?" "i- uh, i- you're my soulmate!"

summary : in a world where everyone is given a necklace that connects to their soulmates, you’re getting fed up with not finding yours, until you are forced to take another bus route for once and bump into a pink-haired stranger who just so happens to have a necklace that is similar to yours. if only he would wear his necklace outside of his sweater you’d be able to confirm.

word count : 9,000 :)

genre : very short/mild smut! fluff!

☆read the other volumes?

if you had a dollar for every time that you felt like an outcast in life, you'd be a billionaire.

throughout your entire life, you have always been different. to the point where it was pretty noticeable to everyone around you- to everyone that saw you even for the first time.

your school years have always been difficult due to your unfortunate outcastedness. but part of you expected it to be. if you weren't like everyone else in a social setting then of course you would stick out- whether that be in a positive or negative way.

you could handle being the 'misfit' at school. sure, it annoyed you on certain days- like when you were younger and everyone in your class continued to tell you that they would 'play with you tomorrow' at recess- but when it became tomorrow, they would say the same thing to you.

in your high school years, it got a little worse when actual attraction started to set into your puberty minds, and the male vs female gaze started to partake in the majority of everyone's self decisions.

it got a little exasperating when you felt isolated while being with your own family, especially in the world you live in.

when a child is born into your special world, they're immediately taken to the head counsel to be christened. they're prayed over for multiple minutes as president catiana speaks to the emperors above, her hand becoming possessed by them as she draws out the form that they have deemed as their destined shape that connects them to their soulmate.

the shape, whatever that may be, is immediately taken to the lapidarist to create the shape into a rock form before welding it onto a chain necklace for the new child to wear for their entire life. at some point in that child's life, they will find another person that bears the other half of the shape of their necklace- meaning that they have found their soulmate.

no one except for president catiana knows who or what the emperors are and why they have given everyone in your world a present that connects them to their soulmate, but no one really questions it. the tradition of soulmate necklaces is an ancient tradition that runs as far as anyone has looked back on.

you've heard multiple soulmate stories- from in history class, some from your friends, and some from your parents. you've heard that sometimes a person never finds their soulmate- leaving them to hopefully find another person who hasn't found theirs to date or marry- or to die alone; unloved.

your parents had found their soulmates- each other- when they were fifteen during their first year of high school. they've been inseparable since and have given you a valuable, role model-like relationship to look up to as you grew up.

when you were younger you had hoped to find your soulmate around the same age as your parents did. you remember being excited on your first day of high school- hoping to find your soulmate as quickly as your parents did in their first years.

when your first year of high school ended and you were still single- alone- you were a bit disappointed but told yourself to not give up as you still had three more years of high school left to find your soulmate at a young age.

during your second year of high school, multiple students in your school had found their soulmates- linking their necklaces for fun in front of everyone in the cafeteria to show off. the rounds of gasps and awes that took place your second year because of the number of soulmate couples being completed were cute at first- but as they continued into your third year of high school you couldn't help but feel annoyed and frustrated- jealous even.

soon, now in your last year of high school, when you have started to accept that you were an outcast and still had no sign of your soulmate- you were pissed off.

it seemed like you couldn't catch a break from all the happy, soulmate couples.

at school, they were filling the cafeteria, couples basically sitting on top of each other in pure love and happiness making out and laughing while you sat alone in the corner with your disgusting cafeteria food.

then, when you went home, your parents were constantly openly loving each other, holding hands, kissing, years old inside jokes that they only understood- something that you once found cute was now just pure exhausting to watch and listen to.

you didn't like your necklace when you were younger- the despise feeling you have for it following you along as you got into your teenage years.

your necklace's main component was a gold circle with a simple face on it that seemed to be smiling from ear to ear- if it had ears. on the right side of the circle were around ten triangles that seemed like spikes at first when you were first given it when you were six years old.

you remember holding the necklace in your hand when your parents gifted it to you on your birthday. you couldn't help but feel so attached to the necklace, not expecting yours to look so abstract and cheery looking.

"this is mine?" you asked your parents who were looking at you so anxiously, excited to see your first reaction to being a step closer to finding your soulmate.

your parents nodded, "do you want me to help put it on?" your mother asked, standing up when you agreed. you watched your parents' excited expressions in the mirror reflection as your mom fastened the chain around your neck. "there." your mother stood back.

your small fingers brushed against the necklace for the first time on your neck, "what even is it?" you asked with a tilt of your head, still not believing that it was your necklace.

"we think it's a sun." your dad spoke with a smile, making eye contact with you in the mirror. "or- at least half of a sun."

"your soulmate probably has the other side of the spikes, y/n!" your mother clapped cheerily. you quirked an eyebrow at your mom's theory, not believing that someone is just walking around with a string of ugly spikes around their neck- you felt kinda bad for them if they were.

you thought that as you grew older maybe you would grow more of a connection with your necklace- but you didn't. in fact, you believe the opposite happened.

you realized early on in your life that you hated the way gold jewelry looked on you- the ugly sun around your necklace contrasted so awful against your skin- no matter what anyone else had told you. your earrings, rings, and bracelets were always silver. you felt prettier with the paler colour of your jewelry.

you also quickly learned that you were not a morning or overall day person. you preferred late nights and everyone close to you referred to you as a night owl. you loved staying up into late hours of the night- when it was quiet and you felt like it was only you in the world for once. it was only you awake late at night so you wouldn't feel like an outcast for at least a few hours.

you could tell that your parents were getting slightly disappointed the more you aged that you hadn't found your soulmate around the same age that they had. of course, there was no 'set age' that you had to find your soulmate, but it seemed like they wanted you to fall in love as young as they did so that you could cherish your soulmate for as long as possible.

you've begun to feel so much pressure to find your soulmate, whether it was on purpose or not, that you feel like you could care less if you found yours or not. you didn't see the big deal anymore, not with watching all the 'love' around you at all times.

"have a good day at school, y/n!" your mother called from the kitchen, poking her head around the corner in time to see you open the front door.

"i'll try." you groaned, not wanting to leave the house anyway.

"don't forget to smile, y/n! your soulmate could be just around the corner!" your mother pointed to her own pretty smile.

you forced an overexcited, sarcastic smile on your face in response, making your mom laugh in response as you left your house.

you grumbled to yourself as her constant reminders that you need to find your soulmate, or that your soulmate could be lurking anywhere. you were getting tired of all this soulmate talk that you wanted to rip your hair out. you even mentally cursed your soulmate for taking so damn long to find you.

you kicked a stone that was on the sidewalk as you made your way to the bus stop, needing to let go of some of your frustration in at least the smallest way possible. you watched the small rock fly and hit the bus stop post against the sidewalk. looking up at the familiar sign that you've stood beside for the past four years, you realized that there was a paper taped against it.

as you got close enough to read it, you realized that it was a letter explaining that the city was getting rid of the bus you had taken every single day away and that the people who used the bus would have to take another one.

"oh my god," you grumbled, kicking another stone in frustration and pulling out your phone to find another bus route to school. "my luck is just awful, isn't it?"

luckily, another bus stop wasn't too far from your now old one. still, you'd have to walk farther than usual, but at least you'd still be able to be at school on time.

your wait for the new bus wasn't long as you made it there just in time for when the bus pulled up. unlike your old bus stop, where it was just you that got on at your stop, there seemed to be a lineup of students your age waiting to get on the bus.

the new bus was a lot more crowded, and you struggled to find an empty spot to sit in. there seemed to be half of the students that went to your school on this bus. you had to push yourself through people (who all gave you a dirty look) to get to the back of the bus. 

as you reach the stairs at the back of the bus, there’s a boy standing there blocking your entrance to it. he’s wearing all black that matches his black hair- and even with the crowded bus- you practically falling all over the place as the bus driver starts to speed off- you still think to yourself how much the colour black doesn’t suit him. 

his face is rounder with pretty high cheekbones and his light rose coloured lips are pulled into a scowl as he stares out the bus window. his wired headphones are tangled down his chest as you have to look up at him to see his face completely. 

the bus makes a harder turn and it sends you flying forward- hitting the shoulder of the boy that you were just examining. you manage to catch yourself on the railing of the stairs before you full-on face planted onto the dirty bus floor. you turn around to apologize to the boy that you had rammed your shoulder into- but quickly get intimidated when his scowl is already staring directly at you. 

you mumble an apology to him quickly, turning around to move to the empty spot you found. your eyes land on him again once you’re sat- his eyes are boring into yours as he watches you sit down finally. 

you shrug your shoulders at him when he doesn’t turn around- almost asking what is it that he wants and you mouth the words “i’m sorry” to him again. the boy only shrugs in return and looks away from you towards the window again, watching as the bus continues to drive almost crazily around the city. 

you feel uncomfortable for the rest of the bus ride. you felt like you weren’t able to take your eyes off of the boy with the mean scowl, every few seconds you felt the urge to look over at him again. 

with each look you would notice more and more about him: like the few freckles that were scattered over his face, the pretty gold earrings in his ears and the way his fingers would tap against his thigh to the beat of the music he was listening to with his headphones. if it weren’t for the frown on his rosy lips and his eyebrows furrowed together underneath his black bangs then you would’ve thought he was quite the happy guy. 

the thought of how much the black hair cascading around his face doesn’t suit him crosses your mind. neither does the frown- and you briskly wish to see what his facial features looked like when he smiled- thinking that it would probably brighten up the fatigued and tired bus that you were on. 

the boy got off at the bus stop before the stop at the school, making you wonder if he went to your school or not. you had never seen him before- but had a backpack on and looked around your age. you watched him walk on the sidewalk- the scowl never leaving his face- until the bus started driving again and he was out of sight. 

as you walked to your first class of the day you couldn’t get this weird feeling off of your chest and the thoughts of the mean boy from this morning out of your mind. you didn’t know if the two symptoms you were having were connected or not- but they were annoying and you wanted them to stop. you hoped that your class would make you stop feeling this way as you sat down in your usual seat. 

“what’s up with you?” yuna’s voice pulled you out of your thoughts. you’ve been friends with yuna since your freshman year and she’s always been very blunt since you’ve known her. 

“what?” you question, taking in how her small figure was turned backwards in her seat in front of you so she could look at you.

with her eyebrow quirked up, “i said hi to you and you ignored me and you’ve basically just been staring off into the distance zoning out for the past five minutes.” 

“oh.” you realize that you have been thinking about the encounter with the mean bus boy again- thinking about how you’ve never been so intrigued with someone before. 

“yeah, ‘oh’, what’s wrong?” yuna tilted her head, knowing you like the back of her own hand since you’ve grown so attached to one another during your highschool days. 

“nothing really,” you feel like you respond honestly, because the mean boy on the bus this morning was truly nothing (at least it was at the moment). yuna gives you the look that she always gives you when she knows that there is more to the story than what you are saying. 

“morning, everyone!” your teacher interpts your conversation, making yuna give you one more suspicious look before shes turning in her seat again to fast the front of the class. “so today, we will be going over the basics of the history of soulmates- a quick soulmates 101 if you will.”  

you tapped your pen against your notebook for majority of the class as your teacher went over things that you felt like you’ve known since you were a child. soulmates were such an important and big aspect in your society that you’re sure everyone knew about the topics and facts that the teacher was going over. for a second you questioned yourself as to why you even took this class- but remembered that it was because it was an easy A. 

“now, does anyone know what exactly happens when you meet your soulmate?” your teacher asked the class, when no one raised their hand he continued with a soft smile on his older face, “great things happen,” he nods finally. he turns to the board and writes on it ‘what happens?’ “when you meet your soulmate you may feel as if you have known them for much longer than you have- as if you’ve known them your entire life.” the topic peaks your interest as you actually listened, wanting to know more for when and if the time ever happens for you, “divine timing might start to take place- as in everything else in your life will start to come together for you.” : 

“and in some cases you’ll even find that telepathy can occur if you are truly meant to be together- they’ve figured that this specifically happens when you’ve spent multiple past lives with your soulmate.” :

yuna turns around to look at you, her usual big eyes are in squints as she stares directly into your own.

“what are you doing?” you ask her quietly to not disturb the class. 

“are you getting any specific words in your head right now?” yuna asks, her eyes continuing to be closed in sharp slits. 

“um, no?” you tilted your head confused. 

“damn, i wanted to see if you were my soulmate.” yuna’s eyes returned to normal and her lips formed a pout. 

you laughed at her, “maybe in another life, yun.” your friend winked at you and turned back to her notebook, scribbling the words the teacher had written on the board into her notebook. 

“you could possibly feel like time is never ending when you first talk to your soulmate- and that you have everything in common with them- like they truly are your other half.” you teacher drones on about what happens when you meet your soulmate for a little while longer- making you think if you have ever had any feeling like the ones he was mentioning. 

of course you drew a blank when you tried to apply them to any interactions you’ve ever had- plus you were pretty sure that i fyou ever meetyour soulmate you would know the second you’re standing right in front of them. 

even when your soulmate class finishes, you find yourself thinking about the mean bus boy and about what happens when you meet your soulmate. you couldn’t get the stupid boy out of your head- but you figured that it was because you had left a bad impression on him, not meaning to upset him by literally being thrown into him on the bus- but then you wondered why you even cared about the impression you had left on him, it’s not like you’d ever see him again…

he was standing on the bus the next day. 

as soon as you started walking down the aisle of the bus you could feel that he was close- you scanned the bus for him at the same time as you were scanning the bus for an empty seat to sit at. 

you almost didn’t recognize the boy today as he no longer had black hair covering his forehead- but pink hair instead. 

you sat down in the spot directly behind him. you weren’t sure if he even noticed you today as he was staring down at his phone- the scowl still sprawled on his face as he looked the screen. 

with his new pink hair, you thought about how much more it suited him. he looked prettier than ever and you felt more drawn to him. 

you felt your hands start to get clammy as you realized how close you were sitting to him and how you were staring at him like a possible maniac. 

you got the same feeling that you had felt the day before- like you couldn’t take your eyes off of him. you had to keep forcing yourself to look away from him. 

it didn’t take long of your obvious staring for him to catch on. from his standing position he turned his head to the right slightly, looking right at you with the same scowl on his face that he seemed to always have. direct eye contact with him seemed to get you out of the weird trance you were in and turned to look out the window again- feeling your cheeks turn warm at the thought of being caught. 

when you glanced at him in the corner of your eye again after what felt like a minute (a very long minute) he was turned back to his phone again, not paying any attention to you, making you let out a quiet sigh of relief. 

the now pink haired boy pulled the wire to request for the bus to stop at the next bus stop- which was the same stop as the day before- the one that was just before all the other students got off to go to school. 

and maybe your constant urge to stare at the boy did some good for both of you and the universe because you caught the way he dropped his wired head phones on the bus floor as he was about to step off of the bus. 

without even really realizing you jumped up, letting out a rushed ‘hey!” to him, you bent down to pick up the headphones when another pale hand reached down with you. your fingers laced in the wires and brushed against the warm hand at the same time. as you looked up you realized that the boy was picking them up with you. 

you saw his pink bangs first as they covered his forehead and eyes again, and then when he moved his head upwards you made eye contact and realized how retty his eyes actually were- also hwo close your faces had suddenly become. 

you stood up before him, looking away from his face and lower to his hoodie. as he stood up a few seconds after you, a silver jewelry caught your attention in his hoodie. it was hard to see but you could recognize the spikes from anywhere. 

they were the ugly spikes that were also on your own necklace. 

you couldn’t have been more sure of it if you tried- they were the same spikes that you’ve never seen on anyone’s soulmate necklace before. 

but his was silver as yours was gold. 

a heavy feeling settled in your chest at the recollection of what your own looked like- as if you had somehow been able to forget the jewelry that you wear everyday. you hadn’t realized you were still holding onto the other side of his headphones as you both stood in front of each other. 

“uh, thanks?” the boy spoke to you, a disturbed expression on his face when you wouldn’t let go of his headphones. 

“oh- sorry- uh- you’re welcome.” you almost stuttered out, letting your fingers drop the side of his headphones that you were holding. 

the boy nodded with a tight lipped smile and turned on his heel to exit the bus completely. you stood in shock at how soft his voice sounded- so different than how his usual facial expression would have made him sound like. 

you stood in the same spot, staring at where the boy once stood as long as it took for him to step off, the bus doors to close and for the bus to keep driving with the boy nowhere in sight. 

the boy’s voice played in your head for the entire day- it blocked out every other noise and it was all you could think about. 

the mean bus boy’s voice was pretty- just like everything else about him. 

you didn’t see him again for a while. 

everyday you took the bus that week you were getting more and more upset each time you stepped on the bus and he wasn’t there. everytime it got to the bus stop before the schools’ you got upset that no one was requesting the stop and getting off. 

there was no mean bus boy with pink that had an awful scowl on his face and twisted headphones that he blasted music and tapped his fingers on his thighs to. 

there was no boy that potentially, possibly, might have been your soulmate. 

you cursed yourself for not doing something when you noticed his necklace- for not asking if you could even see it clearer. 

and if you weren’t giving yourself enough shit for not doing anything when your possible soulmate was standing right in front of you- yuna was definitely giving you shit- cursing at you in the middle of the hallways making all the other students glare at you two for being too loud. 

yuna asked you to describe the boy to her- hoping that maybe she knew him. but she only gave you a disappointed face when she couldn’t think of anyone that matched that description. 

so not only did you not know the boy's name or age- you didn’t even know what school he went to. 

by friday- a full week of not seeing your potential soulmate, you had given up all hope on him and yourself. 

the weekend was dreadful. the days went by fast as you slept through them- but the nights were restless. 

you usually liked staying up throughout the hours of the night- where it was silent and peaceful and it was only you awake in the house. the neighbourhood fell into a peaceful slumber while you stayed awake with your thoughts racing. 

your heart felt like there was a hole in it and you couldn’t describe the feeling in any other way besides that. 

on monday you felt like shit. your sleeping schedule was even more out of whack than it usually was. you didn’t bother showering from the amount of sleepiness in your body that had taken over. you went to school in the same sweatpants that you had slept in all weekend. 

the wave of uneasiness that started to smother your entire being was a nuisance to you and to everyone else around you- yet you had no idea as to what had specifically caused it. 

you trudged your way onto the bus on monday mourning, your own headphones wrapped your fingers this morning as you sat down on the bus listening to music- trying to distract yourself from how tired you were. 

your heartbeat started to pick up pace as you sat down. it felt like sheer panic was coming over your body as you simply just sat on the bus with no one directly around that morning. your hand covered your heart, trying to calm it as you took a deep breath. 

in the corner of your eye you saw a shade of pink that look all too familiar to you. 

in a millisecond you whipped your head to the side to see it clearly. 

there, across the aisle from you, sat the boy- the mean boy with the scowl that you couldn’t get out of your head for the past week and a half. and he was already looking at you. 

it was somehow silent on the bus as you both stared at each other- different songs playing through both your headphones. you couldn’t tell if the bus was moving or not as you didn’t dare break eye contact with him- thinking that if this is truly your last time seeing this boy then you wanted to remember each hazel flake that was beautifully set in his eyes. 

you don’t know how long you both stared at each other- but you cursed yourself again for not realizing he was beside you when you sat down. 

when he reached his arm up to pull the wire to request the bus to stop, your heart sank as your eyes pulled apart. you watched him as he made sure his headphones were wrapped around his fingers today as he got up- obviously not wanting to drop them again as he got off. 

the sheer panic you felt minutes before had returned and you didn’t know what to do. you couldn’t let this boy disappear from you again- especially not after all the shit you had gotten from yuna the week before. 

before you could process your thought process- you jumped up and stepped off the bus at the boys’ usual bus stop- the one before the school. 

you mentally damned the school as you wanted to know if the pink-haired boy in front of you was your soulmate or not. you watched him walk to the right- away from your school- for a second, wanting to create some distance between you guys. you were sure that the boy was not expecting you to jump off the bus after him as he didn’t turn around once- his eyes glued to his phone again. 

you sigh but watch his figure wander down the sidewalk toward your school. until he stops at the store right outside the school gates. he walks inside, and the bell on the door jingles as he enters. you rush to the window, wanting to catch a glimpse of him inside.

he's the only customer in the store as you watch him scan the drink aisle. you wonder for a second if he'll pick his favourite drink and let you in on his preferences.

you see him close the fridge door, a drink in hand as he starts to walk up to the cashier. you struggle to see what he has picked until he places it on the counter for the worker to scan.

and of course, it's the absolute worst drink you have ever tried.

the lemon-flavoured juice that everyone raved over that you hated. the bottle was wrapped in yellow paper with cartoon pictures of limes, suns and bees.

the boy smiles at the cashier as he finishes paying and grabs his rink to leave. you see that his smile pulls at his cheeks and eyes, making his eyes turn to slits. there's a pull at your chest when you see his smile- like his smile can suddenly drag you into him and pull you around.

The bell at the door makes you realize that you're still on your tiptoes, perching against the window to look inside. you quickly turn on your heel, so you're body is faced away from the door, and you make it look like you've been leaning against the store's wall for some time. like it's a natural thing for you to do.

you turn around again when you think he's walked further enough to not notice you. you can see his pink hair walking in the direction towards your school, his yellow drink swaying by his side as he holds it in his hand. you can see his white head phones looping up to his ears as he looks down at his phone as he walks. you muse yourself and wonder if his music taste is just as bad as his drink preference.

you start walking to school after him, lost in your own thoughts about him as you stare at the back of his pink-haired head.

suddenly, the boy stops and spins on his heel, a glare on his face as he stares at you.

you didn't realize how close you had gotten to him from walking almost absentmindedly. so now, you were only a meter apart from one another. his glare against your sheepish smile.

"can i help you with something? or are you just stalking me?" his voice rings out so melodically that it almost makes you forget that you need to respond. when you don't answer his eyebrow quirks up, "i mean you followed me off of the bus, waited for me outside the store, and is now following me to school."

"right! i- uh," you shake your head, trying to get your thoughts together, "you're my soulmate!" not exactly the way you wanted to tell him, but you can't go back now.

the boy's face drops slightly as he takes in your own surprised appearance. there's no longer a glare on his face, but hesitance and curiosity. he pulls out his headphones in one tug, and lets them tangle in his hand as he speaks. "what do you mean?"

"i mean," you start to reach into your shirt, pulling out the gold necklace you've always hated. "i think ours match."

the boy examines your necklace, not moving an inch closer than the meter you were standing at. you could see his mocha eyes swirl over the spikes with a hint of recognition, before darkening to a glare again.

"i don't think so, mine's silver." he shakes his head in disagreement.

"well, let me see yours." you speak quickly, scared that he'll somehow disappear in a second. you see him hesitate, before he reaching into his hoodie and pulling out his own necklace.

you step forward, wanting a clear sighting of the necklace instead of the small glimpses you've caught on the bus. when you step closer you instantly smell his perfume and you wonder if he can smell yours.

the silver charm hangs in front of your face, now that you're up close you can see that the awful spikes you've always thought were distasteful are one-hundred percent identical on his. you reach out and grab it so it stops swaying. the boy takes a small step back at your movement, but allows you to hold his charm. "let's just check anyways." you tell him and he doesn't respond, only watches in silence as you bring your charm to his.

in an instant, your gold sun and his silver half-moon click together. the top and bottom spike fit each other perfectly, despite being different metals.

a small gasp leaves your mouth as the charms become one. not taking your eyes off it as they hang together in the air, successfully holding you and the boy together.

you're unable to read the boys face as he examines your connect charms. his mocha eyes are almost glazed over as he stares.

as you two stand there, connected by metal, it's like both of you are waiting for something, anything, to happen. a sign of some sort to finalize that you are soulmates. but instead, it's just some girl and some boy, standing on the sidewalk, probably late to school.

in an instant, the boy is removing his charm from yours. your necklace falls flat against your chest now that it's not being confined with his.

"what do you think?" you ask him quietly, hopeful.

"i guess we're soulmates."

"it was so awkward, yuna!" you cry as you put your face in your hands.

"why? what exactly happened?" your best friend asks you as you sit in class, supposed to be working but are too consumed with the events of earlier this morning.

you lift your head slightly as you speak so she can hear you, "it was just so- so awkward! and silent! nothing like what i've heard it's suppose to be!"

"like what?"

"like, like magical! there was certainly no magic, no sparks, no- no, nothing!"

"well that's weird." you groan at your friends words, putting your face in your hands again. "so what are you going to do?"

"i don't know, yuna!" you wish you could disappear, all of this soulmate business almost too much for you. "i told him i'd see him on the bus tomorrow and then ran off."

"you ran and left your soulmate on the sidewalk alone?" yuna exclaims, amusement in her voice. it only makes you groan again, not caring if your classmates were glaring at you for the noise.

"i don't know if he's my soulmate!"

"well you thought he was your soulmate before, and you said he thinks your soulmates! isn't this all you ever wanted, y/n?" yuna asks you, rubbing your back.

"no it's not!" you sit up, "when i found my soulmate i wanted it to be a undoubtedly, love filled moment! like in all the soulmate-finding stories i've heard! not, whatever happened this morning."

"was it really that bad?" yuna grimaces as she asks.

"he asked me if i was stalking him!"

"oh."

you groan and put your head down onto your desk, closing your eyes. you hope that when you open them again you would wake up from this awkward nightmare.

"what's his name, anyways?"

"oh my god," you close your eyes tighter, "i didn't even ask my soulmate his name!" yuna's laugh echos in your ears, and you can't help but compare it to how soft his voice filled your ears earlier.

the next door, you dread stepping onto the bus. you make your way to your usual spot, keeping your hood up and eyes locked on the floor. with every stop getting closer to his, you feel your heartbeat pick up. even though you tell yourself to calm down, you feel more and more adrenaline fill your body. when the bus stops at the designated stop, you refuse to look anywhere but your lap, no longer wanting, hoping to catch a glimpse of the boy with pink hair.

a body sits next to you, their thighs almost brushing against yours. it's then that you smell a perfume so similar that it draws you to slowly pull your head to the person beside you. you gulp when you lock eyes with the mocha ones you seem to so desperately fall into.

without a word, his hand reaches out to you. you glance down and see the white headphone he's offering you. your eyes following the wire that leads to the other one, placed into his own ear.

you take his headphone offer, popping it into your ear and are instantly listening to music.

it only takes a second of you realizing shawn mendes is singing in your ear to make you groan out in disgust.

"what?" the boy's voice asks you.

"just, shawn mendes? really?" you crinkle your nose up.

"what's wrong with that?" he defends himself and shawn.

"i just hate pop music."

the boy tilts his head to the side, "then what music do you like?"

you shrug, "rock music. like the who, queen or even ac/dc."

now it was the pink-haired boy's turn to crinkle his nose up in disgust. "really?" he takes the headphone out of your ear when you nod and pops it into his other ear, blocking you out.

you huff, crossing your arms over your chest and looking out the window, watching how the city moves when the bus drives by. you start to think to yourself about how could the boy beside your be your soulmate.

it was awkward between you two. you seemed to have nothing in common. there was nothing magical that happened when your charms connected. you were struggling to comprehend what you two could even have a conversation about.

when the bus made its final stop at the school and there was not another word spoken between you two you thought that this would probably be the last time he even sat with you on the bus.

but then, the pink haired boy turns and says almost slyly over his shoulder, "my name's sunoo, by the way."

if your ears didn't seem to cut out all the other noise and voices on the bus, you would've missed it.

"i'm y/n."

the pink-haired boy, sunoo, gives you one last look before he's stepping off the bus, getting lost in the herd of students and the noise returns to your ears and you wish it wouldn't. you wish you could only hear his voice for the rest of your life.

you want to question why he's sitting beside you the next day on the bus. but instead you question him as to why he's handing you his phone.

similar to the day before, he's sitting down beside you without a word and handing you something. you furrow your brows together, looking between his phone and him.

"your number." he speaks impatiently. your lips form an 'O' as you nod and enter your number, double checking that you put in the right number before you're passing his phone back to him. you watch in the corner of your eye as he adds your name to the contact. he presses on the emoji keyboard, his fingers hover over them, before he ultimately saves it as it is and locks his phone.

you wonder all day if sunoo is going to text you today, or tomorrow, or never. but, your pondering stops when you get a text during last period.

unknown : meet me outside by the front gate when school's over?

me : sure

it's not hard to find sunoo after school. his pink hair standing out in the large crowd of students going home. you smile at him once you're standing in front of him.

"do you like ice cream?" he asks you, your ears sound like they're popping and only his voice can be heard.

"yes."

"let's go." he turns on his heel, starting to walk down the street towards downtown, where all the shops and markets are located. you struggle to keep up with him at first, as he so easily glides through all the students.

when he finally stops, you see a giant sign "Kim's Sweet Shop" and you know exactly where you are.

"oh! i've been here before!" you say to him, a grin on your face full of recognition.

"really?" sunoo asks you, turning to look at you, "my parents own this shop."

"no way! i use to come here all the time when i was younger!"

"hm," sunoo hums, "maybe that's where i've seen you before."

"what do you mean?"

"well, when i first saw you on the bus, i thought you looked so familiar but i couldn't put my finger on where i've seen you before."

"oh, i didn't think you even noticed me on the bus."

sunoo shrugs, "of course i did." when you narrow your eyes at him he speaks, "you're beautiful." when you feel your cheeks light up a colour that matches his hair, you're glad he continues, "c'mon let's get some ice cream. and you better not like some gross flavour like pistachio."

"hey! pistachio is good!"

sunoo only groans in response.

when your ice creams are finished, and you both argue about who's favourite flavour is grosser, you let sunoo walk you to a park down the street. all the kids have gone home for dinner, so you and sunoo are alone at top the jungle gym. your mouths are full of sugar as you look out onto your small town, settling down for the friday night.

"i listened to a queen album last night." sunoo breaks the silence between you.

"did you?" you sit up at the news. "and what did you think of it?"

sunoo smiles gently, "it was alright."

you try to hide the happiness that fills your stomach alongside the pistachio ice cream you finished. "well, i can tell you now that i'm not listening to a shawn mendes album for you!"

"hey! what's your problem with shawn?"

"my problem is that he sounds like every other pop singer!"

sunoo gasps, placing his hand on his chest, "i can not believe you just said that!"

you roll your eyes, "well send me some more pop albums besides shawn's and i'll try not to hate them."

when the fall wind picks up, you let sunoo walk to you home.

the walk is full of laughter and teasing as both of you struggle to walk more than a meter without nudging the other for 'walking weird'. you cheeks hurt from grinning when you step onto your street and you realize your afternoon with sunoo is over. it went by so fast.

it's silent when you step onto your porch step. the porch light shining over both of you so you're not left in complete darkness. you twiddle with your hands in front of you, wondering how your night will end now that sunoo is going home.

"so what do you think?" the pink-haired boy asks you.

"about what?"

"about us being soulmates. do you really think we are?"

his question lingers all around you. you can't deny that it's been something you've been debating for weeks now. you feel like you can still find ways to argue if you are not. but after this afternoon, you find it hard to.

"i think we are."

even though he tries to hide it, sunoo's smile takes up his face as he looks down at the pavement, kicking nothing with his shoe. "me too."

there's happiness around you as you bid each other a good night. you watch him walk down your street until he turns and he's out of sight. your ears feel like they're popping when he's gone. your parents don't ask questions when you walk inside, only saying good night as you happily drag your body upstairs to your bedroom.

your body feels lighter when you lay in bed, but you know you still won't be able to sleep for hours. your insomnia mixed with love is a better feeling than your insomnia mixing with anxiety. you smile to yourself when you catch yourself saying the 'L' word.

you roll over onto your stomach, not caring about the time when you text sunoo saying how much fun you had tonight, and to thank him for the ice cream. as soon as you press send, your body collapses into a deep sleep.

the first thing you see on your phone when you wake up at noon is a text from sunoo from hours earlier:

sunoo : you really need to fix your sleeping schedule. sunoo : wanna hang out later?

you realize that you texted him the night before at three in the morning before passing out. and then you realize that you need to get ready to hang out with sunoo later.

the next weeks are filled with things you could only have imagined before. sunoo and you started by showing each other your favourite places around town. which seemed to be very different from each others.

you took him to the museum where you frequented. showing him your favourite paintings that you have basically memorized. you told him how you wanted one of your art works to be in this museum one day. he didn't seem to understand your love for this museum in particular, but he didn't say anything and just let you pull him around for hours until he was sure he's seen even every nook and cranny of the building.

he took you to his favourite cafe that was probably the busiest building in your whole town. you always tried to avoid this place, but sunoo assured you that it was the best. you didn't like all the noise in the place, but every time sunoo spoke it made it better since it only seemed like you and him in the cafe. you sat the table while sunoo bought every snack that he deemed to be the most delicious thing on the earth. and even when you only took a bite of it since you didn't like it, sunoo didn't seem to care. he only laughed at the ridiculous face you made while tasting it.

you started meeting up in the halls at school during class hours, laying around on the stairs together until you heard someone coming. you sat closer and closer to each other on the bus every morning, annoying the others who were still half asleep with your laughing. sometimes sunoo would surprise you on a saturday morning with a pistachio ice cream cone from his parent's shop, urging you to eat it before it would melt.

when sunoo told you he wanted to take you somewhere special, you thought it would be another cafe. but it turned out to be the roof of his parent's shop.

you were scared at first, but when sunoo reached his hand out to help you up, it didn't seem too bad after all.

sunoo sat beside you, his pink hair fading into the sunset above you. he looked beautiful. his tan skin milking the sky of it's golden and pink hues. his mocha eyes contrasting so perfectly. and his gorgeous smile, taking up his whole face every time you made him laugh.

when you decided to lay down on the rooftop, sunoo followed you. the gentle wind would surround your bodies, making you closer together for some warmth. when sunoo's hand circled yours, you didn't shy away from the heat it provided.

on either sides of you was the sun and the moon. the sun ready for the sleep, and the moon ready to take charge for the night, watching over everyone as they slept. you turn your head to the side to look at sunoo, giggling when your noses touched from how close you were.

"i'm glad you're my soulmate," sunoo's voice speaks, and the rest of the world goes blank.

"why?"

sunoo rolls his eyes at you but responds, "because you're funny, caring, understanding. everything that's perfect."

you smile, "understanding? i'm not sure i understand your love for shawn mendes though." you laugh when sunoo nudges your shoulder with his own, "but thank you. i'm glad you're my soulmate, too."

suddenly, you feel a burning on your chest, right where your charm lays. and you know sunoo feels it too from the way his hand not connected with yours lands on his chest. your eyes meet his mocha ones and you can't seem to look away. the charm burns your skin more intensely until your face is right in front of sunoo's. and you give in.

as soon as your lips touch the burning stops and you feel yourself being tugged closer together. your charm interlinks with sunoo's as you kiss so you're connected in more ways than one. you feel perfect like this. the way you can taste, hear and feel sunoo. even with your eyes closed you can see him flawlessly, the way he always is.

when you both pull away, you gasp as your eyes meet your connected charms.

"oh my god," sunoo says, taking his charm from yours to look at it. your charm hits your chest before you grab it. "it- they,"

"they changed." you finish for him. examining the once gold, sun charm now turn into a silver sun. the ugly spikes you hated are softer as they surround the sun's face.

you glance towards sunoo's whose face is just as confused as your own. his silver moon is now gold, and his spikes too are softer, more round as sunoo's fingers trace them.

sunoo lets out a sigh, "thank god, because i really hate silver."

"i really hate gold." you smile at him, laughing when sunoo pulls you in for another, one of many, kisses.

from that day on, sunoo and you don't shy away from anything, despite your differences. sure, each other's parents are confused on how both of you are soulmates since you are so different, and maybe sometimes you are, too. but you don't let it bother you.

the love you have for each other is something that you know only the two of you have in this large world. you're lucky enough to find your soulmate in the small town you grew up in. there seems to be no worries with sunoo, time, pace or future is something you know you can handle as long as sunoo is beside you. he's someone you know that will never judge you, even your hatred for shawn mendes.

so when sunoo's hand slips into his sweatpants he let you borrow, you don't shy away from him. you place your hand over his boner that's so noticeable under his sweats. sunoo groans, surging towards your body and resting his head in your shoulder as he continues to circle your clit.

"fuck," sunoo pants in a small whimper.

you're sharking your head, your other hand coming up to cup his face. "feels so good, already." your lips start to move against each other, getting lost in the pleasure both of you are feeling.

both of your movements speed up, trying to get the other one to feel just as good as the other. a low whine escapes your lips as your fingers dig into his pink hair that you love so much.

sunoo grunts, using all of his power to continue to circle your tiny, swollen clit. "you're mine, right, y/n?" you feel too good to answer with words, your hips moving in sync with his fingers, so he takes your nod as an answer.

both of you can feel your orgasms approaching. neither of you stop, or want to stop. focusing on the other reaching their high.

"fuck, sunoo!" you gasp out, a small squeal falls from your lips as you feel your body tense. the charm on your neck burning the skin under it as you feel a fire take over your body. you feel your cheeks burn to match sunoo's hair as you feel the coil building in your stomach snap.

"shit, baby, i-," sunoo lets out, biting onto his lower lip before he feels his cock twitch and empty into his boxer. your hand doesn't stop jerking his cock over his clothes until he moves his hips away, retracting his hand from your panties at the same time.

you both catch your breaths, the heat from your charms cooling as you come back to your senses. you both laugh as you make eye contact, out of breath but so, so happy. because everything with sunoo is happy.

and even though you and sunoo don't have everything in common. and your soulmate love story isn't like everyone else's, kim sunoo is still your soulmate, you are his.

and you wouldn't want it any other way.

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Ruggie's Lemon Cookies

EVENT PIECE

Ruggie Bucchi x Fem!Reader Word Count: 3.8k+ Tags: Clothed Sex/Messy Kisses/IN FRONT OF MY SALAD?!

Art is by tako86734108 on Twitter!

Aaaaand here we are. Congrats to Ruggie for winning. He deserves it! He's a good boy who works hard and deserves a treat! And again, all of the one shots in Lemon Cookies are just one shots. None of them are connected and they're all open ending for your imaginary desires to fill in the blanks for.

SUMMARY:

Valentine's has arrived and you decided to bake a batch of lemon cookies (with the magical lemon extract) for Ruggie. You always knew that the way to a man's heart; is through his stomach.

With Grim yawning in your arms, you scurried off to school. You had woken up late on a very important morning, oversleeping from exhaustion. You stayed up late last night baking a batch of heart shaped lemon cookies. Sam promised that by purchasing the magical lemon extract, you would have the ability to get closer with whomever you fed the treats to. You were sure that it was all just a metaphor since the romantic holiday was around the corner. But you still purchased the extract nonetheless. Now, with the hurriedly wrapped cookies stuffed in your blazer, you rushed down the dirt path to Night Raven College.

The student you wanted to give the cookies too always felt hard to find without a cash or snack incentive. You would be very unlikely to find him until after school had ended, since you sadly didn’t share any classes. Grim gently clawed at the sleeve of your blazer as you swiftly rounded a corner and ran into your first class of the day. All you could think about was Ruggie Bucchi’s reaction to your Valentine’s Gift.

-♡- 

The hours droned on, and a few times you did spot Ruggie in passing. But with Grim being present, it made you feel too embarrassed to present him the cookies without any embarrassing comments from your furry roommate. It was finally your last class of the day. On one side of you was Grim, and the other was Jack. You watched the clock with a sigh with your chin resting in your palm as the professor droned on about a lesson you didn’t care too much to listen to. “What’s wrong?” Jack whispered, surprising you into straightening your posture. “Oh! Uhhh… Nothing… Sorta…” You trailed off and Grim crawled into your lap to answer for you. “She’s all moody about today.” He whisper yelled. Jack tilted his head in confusion and you could feel your face burn in embarrassment. “She wanted to give that stinkin’ thief a batch of cookies…” He scoffed which left Jack even more lost and you feeling annoyed. “I made Ruggie some cookies as a friendly gift since it’s Valentine’s Day.” You explained with a small frown. 

Jack’s expression changed. His eyes glittered with excitement and his tail started to wag against the wooden seat with a rhythmic thump. “It’s for Ruggie? Did you give them to him?” He asked hopefully as you looked up at the underclassman. Right, Jack really looks up to Ruggie. Understandably so since Ruggie was such a hardworking and independent person. You shook your head with a soft frown. “No, I haven’t found the chance.” You explained and Grim shuffled in your lap with a mumble on how it was a ‘good thing’. “Well… I know where he’s going to be after classes end for the day, if you want to catch him.” Jack hinted with a proud smile gracing his features. It was sweet that he wanted to play wingman for someone he looked up to. “I can hold onto Grim too. I’ll take him with me to Savanaclaw for a while.” The beastman suggested and Grim began to protest with his paws waving in discontent. “It’s just cookies!” He snapped softly, careful not to alert the professor despite his displeasure with the turn of events. “It’s different Grim. And it’s only for an hour or two.” Jack had a pout forming now, his tail stilled and his ears folded downwards. 

If Jack could hold onto Grim then you would have plenty of time to present the cookies to Ruggie. “I would really appreciate it Jack.” You beamed up at him and his eyes sparkled once more with determination. “Ruggie said he’s raiding the cafeteria after classes ended. But, he has a shift at the Mostro Lounge tonight so he won’t be there long.” The beastman warned and you nodded in understanding. You didn’t need too much time. Just enough to get some of your feelings across to the hyena. The moment the bell rang to signal the final class had ended, you had handed Grim over to Jack and packed up your things. Grim protested some more, even as you thanked Jack and assured Grim you would bring him back a snack from your surprise meeting if he was on his best behavior. Hopefully Jack was right, Ruggie would still be there if you made it soon enough. 

-♡- 

You entered the cafeteria, noting silently that it was desolate. Not even the ghosts could be seen or heard lingering through the empty space. You didn’t see, or hear Ruggie either. You peered into the kitchen and noticed it was empty. Your heart began to sink as you wandered deeper into the lonely little space. You looked around, hoping that maybe you had just beaten Ruggie to the cafeteria. But a big part of you assumed he had already taken off for the night. You hang your head as the disappointment begins to settle. You pulled the cookies from your blazer pocket, looking down at the plastic wrapped cookies with a sad expression. You could try to catch him at his shift at the Mostro Lounge, but would you have time to give them to him? And there’s no way Azul would even allow you to breathe the air in the building without paying. 

“What are you doing here?” A question popped up from behind you, and you whipped around to greet the familiar voice. “Ruggie!” You gasped and hid the cookies behind your back. Your face started to burn as you noticed the stack of Tupperware in his hands. You made it before Ruggie. His stormy blue eyes looked you up and down as he made his way into the kitchen with purpose. “I hope you didn’t come here for the leftovers. I already told everyone they were mine.” He warned with a joking tone and placed the small stack of plastic bins on a nearby counter. You kept your back out of his view as he moved around the kitchen with purpose. Get in, get out. “No, no. Um… I was looking for you today.” You explained with a light bounce in your step. The hyena opened up the large fridge and began to peer around inside with an interested ‘uh huh?’. Now sorting through a large assortment of catering trays as he waited for you to continue. 

“I made you something.” You hoped to sound bold, but unfortunately your tone fell mousey. The beastman stopped rummaging and turned to face you with a grin. “Made me something? I thought I smelled something sweet when I came in.” He purred and slowly rose to his feet. The sterile light of the fridge now washed the hyena’s frame with its blinding light. You could see his dark eyebags much clearer and how he seemed to sway with exhaustion. His long shadow danced with him before he pushed the shiny metal door shut with a sly smile. “Can I have it now?” Ruggie asked hopefully as you nodded nervously and slowly pulled your hands from behind your back. 

You outstretched your arms with the cookies now before you, offering them to Ruggie. You watched as his sly expression was momentarily replaced with shock as he looked down at the yellow heart shaped cookies. “You made these for me?” He asked with a gentleness you had never heard from him. You nodded. He was quiet as he pulled the yellow ribbon apart and opened the small bag, taking it from your hands in a fluid motion. 

Ruggie looked happy. Extremely happy. He took one of the cookies with a smile, breaking it in half with the treat fixed between his teeth and his fingers. You could see his tail swishing with content as you felt yourself starting to become bashful. “It’s for Valentine’s Day. I made them for you.” You explained quietly as he ate cookie after cookie with soft crunches of joy. “I forgot that it was today. I celebrated with my middle school class once but that was it.” He hummed softly with content as he stood before you. His cheeks now a faint peachy red. “They aren’t donuts but hey, I’m not a picky person.” He teased you with a snicker and held the bag out to you with a grin. “I think you should eat at least one or two. I have to hurry up here anyway. I have a shift in about an hour.” He sounded sad that he was cutting the meeting short between you. But you were understanding. 

The two of you moved to lean against the broad island counter. As you took a bite out of one of the cookies, you savored the sour taste of the lemon and how bitter it was. You couldn’t help but cringe. You didn’t taste any of the batter as you were baking since Sam said it was for the person you were baking for. “Not enough sugar…” You grumbled and looked defeated at the heart shaped cookie. “Nah, I think whatever seasoning you used was just too strong.” Ruggie shrugged and continued to eat the treats without any signs of discontent. He paused for a moment before crossing his ankles, looking down at the now empty bag with a flash of confusion. “Did you say seasoning?” You asked and he nodded, raising his half lidded eyes to meet your gaze. His pupils looked huge. 

“Yeah. Cookie seasoning.” He spoke with a light growl to his voice that made your heart jump in your chest. Ruggie tapped his fingers against the countertop. Slowly without any sense of rhythm. You could feel your body starting to grow warm and you wanted to discard your blazer. But something felt wrong. Why did you feel so hot? “S’not called ‘cookie seasoning’. It’s lemon extract.” You explained and took note of how breathless you sounded. And yet you did not break Ruggie’s stare as he inched closer. Your face was starting to burn and a burning heat began to rise from within your stomach. “Extract? Like syrup?” You could tell that Ruggie was trying to distract himself from whatever else it was that he was thinking about. You began to unbutton your blazer with a soft sigh of relief. “Are people allergic to lemons?” Ruggie spoke as he began to yank his uniform tie loose. His face was completely flushed and he looked like he was breaking out into a sweat.

What exactly did Sam mean by getting closer with the person you baked the cookies for?  

Your mouth was growing cotton dry as you shook your head. Ruggie was only inches away from you, watching closely as you tossed your blazer to the ground with your heart racing in your chest.”No. I don’t think people are allergic to lemons.” You mumbled and leaned in closer and closer to the beastman. “Is this a good idea?” Ruggie mumbled against your lips. You could hear the faint clink of him hurriedly yanking at his belt. “It’s a good idea to me.” The cafeteria kitchen was empty. Not even the ghostly staff lingered. It really was just you, and Ruggie Bucchi. No one would see you here. 

When your lips meshed, you could taste the faint lingering flavor of the cookies. The hyena trapped you against the counter, gently lifting your body for you to follow. He wanted you to sit on the cool surface of the island countertop. There was a thin trail of drool making its way down your chin as your messy makeout with Ruggie continued. You could feel him pulling you close so your legs relaxed over his hips. The hyena’s belt had fallen loose, and with a swift glance down, you could see the desperate pumps of his fist around his cock. It was already leaking and you could tell he wanted so much more from you. You had eaten only one of the many cookies you baked for him. Part of you felt bad for him. 

So you wanted to help him out. You slipped a hand downwards and grazed his knuckles with the tips of your fingers. With the kisses paused for a moment to breathe you gently nipped at Ruggie’s chin. “Let me?” You requested, and he nodded without a word spoken. His hand pulled away, and you carefully wrapped your fingers around his shaft. You could feel small linear rows of something small and hard going up his cock. You wanted to drool again. You could only imagine that they felt good. You took note of his size being a comfortable fit, albeit being thicker than what you were expecting. The excitement pooled between your thighs as your mouth pressed kisses against his throat and you began to pump slowly. Ruggie’s moans were soft as he gripped at your stocking clad thighs. Squeezing and occasionally scratching as you stroked and teased him. “Does it feel okay?” You asked against his saliva slicked skin and he snickered from above you. 

“I’m easy to please.” He cooed, shuddering under the light kisses you pressed against his throat. You could feel the blood boiling beneath his skin with each light tremble of pleasure. You could feel his breath stutter as you massaged his cock in your palm. Each twitch and pulse made your heart race with the anticipation of what it would feel like inside you. How hard it would feel and if the fit would be… Difficult. 

Ruggie was struggling to find the hem of your tights. His hands roamed along your body, tugging and pulling at the sheer stockings with a growl rumbling in his chest. “I’m sorry, I can-” A squeak of shock erupted from your throat at the sound of fabric being torn. Your hand stopped pumping as you looked down wide eyed at your bunched up skirt. The view was blocked, but you could feel your soaked panties were now exposed to the cool kitchen air. Your body shook with a carnal excitement. Ruggie tore your tights open. “M’sorry.” He apologized under his breath as he yanked your panties to the side to  slip a finger inside of you. He wasn’t sorry. But you didn’t mind. 

The quick curl of the digit up against the soft spongy bundle of nerves inside of you made your body jolt with excitement. Every time he hit that sensitive spot you would whine or gasp. A form of encouragement for the beastman as you relaxed against him. Your hand began to sheepishly attempt to guide him towards the hot, plush cavern of your cunt. You both knew it was what you wanted. But you were growing impatient. You needed him. You needed Ruggie inside of you. “Wan’ me inside?” He whispered and you nodded swiftly. When the beastman rocked his hips against yours it was a struggle to hold back your loud whines. Feeling the round, wet tip of his cock massaging your clit. Just barely sliding inside of you, teasing you as you clawed at his large uniform shirt. With a bit of begging and sucking at the hyena’s neck; you got what you wanted. 

Ruggie pushed in slowly. Filling you up inch by inch with those tiny studs massaging your inner walls as his cock forced you to stretch to accommodate him. The lack of preparation wasn’t something you fully regret, you could bear the pain. Whatever was in that extract left your body needing more and more. And even more after that. Ruggie grabbed your hips and pulled you even closer, forcing you to nearly dangle against the edge of the counter. One leg had fallen, the tip of your shoe just barely touching the ground as the hyena supported the other in his grip. The position allowed him to get even deeper. Spearing you with his cock as he began a steady rhythm with his hips. His head pressed against yours as he started slow. The pleasure was so intense that you desperately wanted to shut your eyes or look anywhere else but Ruggie. But he wouldn’t let you. One of his hands cupped your face and he forced you to look at him. To let him see the expressions you made as he fucked you against the counter as a lustful form of thank you for the cookies. 

Your jaw had fallen slack and the heat in your face caused you to tear up. You wanted Ruggie to move faster. But even when you rutted your hips against his, he kept his pace steady. “I can’t go- Mmn. I can’t go faster. I can't, I can't.” He whimpered as his nails began to dig into your clothes. His face flushed red as he pushed deeper and deeper, nudging those nerves with the round tip of his cock. “You gonna cum? Please go faster. Please?” You weren’t one to beg, but you needed him faster. You needed him harder. The muffled wet smacks of your bodies momentarily slowed to a stop as Ruggie adjusted you against him. Now, you were being supported by his body against yours. The counter dug into your back as your legs and hips hung helplessly in the air as he sped up. Per your request. You cried out and grabbed at his white shirt, tugging roughly as you were forced to not only take his cock and everything he planned to give you, but also to remain looking up at him. His lips captured yours in another heated kiss as his hips continued to roughly rut against yours. 

You were covered in sweat. So was he. Your mouth was filled with the taste of Ruggie. And he had the taste of you. You could feel the way that his biscuit blond pubes stimulate your clit as his cock kissed that spot deep inside of you. So sweet and kind and filled with any and all unspoken affection the two of you may share for one another. You started to chant his name, feeling something round and hard at the base of his cock as the pulses of his cock intensified. You wanted it. You wanted all of Ruggie inside you. He moaned your name in between a string of sloppy kisses and glanced away only for a second. “Inside. Inside me?” You were asking him not to pull out. The lust had fogged your sense of clarity so greatly you couldn’t care to consider the consequences. That could wait. “O-Oh shit I’m cumming. I’m-” Ruggie never finished as he gave you a strangled cry and another round of stuttered thrusts as you shook around him, meeting the feeling of his thick cum filling you with the release of your own juices. Something round and hard pushed inside of you. You winced, but exhaustion was far more overpowering than any pain you could be feeling. 

You trembled against the beastman, your thighs cramping from the tight position and the powerful orgasm as the two of you fell boneless against one another in the empty kitchen. Ruggie fought to catch his breath as he called out your name. All you responded with was a slight nod. You didn’t hear anything he said as his cock continued to fill you with sperm. But you swore you heard him say something about ‘more. And it was something you weren’t opposed to. If you hadn’t fallen asleep against the counter first.

-♡- 

When you finally woke up, your brows furrowed at the soft sound of snoring. You looked around in the darkness, noticing that you weren’t in the school’s cafeteria any longer. Nor were you in your room in Ramshackle. It was a room in Savanaclaw, that much you could tell. It looked late, the moon round and full, high up in the night sky as you blinked awake.

A warm giraffe patterned blanket was pulled up to your chin and you could see a cold stone wall to your right. And when you looked to your left, you relaxed into the mattress. Ruggie’s sleeping face greeted you. He had an arm thrown over your torso from beneath the blanket and he was facing you. His body now cozy and close, curled up under the big blanket with you. You could feel that you were wearing a large shirt and nothing else, and Ruggie was wearing what you assumed were the pants to the pajama set. It was the beastmans attempt at changing you out of your sticky uniform. You appreciated it. 

You gasped softly when his droopy eyes shot open, and he met your gaze. He glanced away for a minute before slowly sitting up in bed. The shift of the covers started to fill you with a sense of loneliness. He scratched at the back of his head, his ears flicking and you watched him fold his hands in his lap. “...So…” He trailed off quietly and was unable to meet your eyes again. Before you could speak, the hyena began again. “I made a deal with Jack so Grim is having a sleepover with him… I washed your uniform,” He turned to face you and you could see a bright peachy flush in his cheeks. His eyes still couldn’t meet yours. “I folded it up and put it on my desk…” He nodded in the desk's direction, but you didn’t bother to spare it a glance. Was he asking you to leave?

“I know you probably want to dash. I get it! Don’t even worry.” He laughed softly. There was a hint of disappointment that caused your brows to furrow. “I uh… I had fun. Even if you only felt that way because-” You sat up and gently pulled at his arm. He froze. Stormy blue eyes locked with your tired gaze. You felt upset with his despairing assumptions. “I made those cookies for you.” The reminder was gentle as you leaned in closer to Ruggie. He was silent. The room was so quiet that you could almost hear the pounding of his heart. “No one else.” You assured him and he nodded in understanding. You pressed your head against his, his warm breath tickled your lips as he spoke again. “Do… Do you wanna stay with me? Just for the night?” The tone of his voice indicated that he was hoping for a yes. “Can I stay?” You asked in a hushed tone and he pulled away slightly to nod. 

The two of you laid down again. Facing one another as Ruggie moved even closer. With a comforting silence following, you allowed your eyes to shut as you prepared for bed. “Are we still friends?” He asked under a whisper and you hummed thoughtfully in response. “What about more?” You suggested and Ruggie snickered. “Yeah. That’s cool with me.” He purred softly and you felt his arm drape itself over your body again. Your other hand locked with the hyenas beneath the blanket and the two of you drifted back to sleep. You swore the taste of the lemon cookies lingered on your tongue. But instead of that sour and bitter flavor, it was far more gentle and sweet.

Tagged Accounts: @ruggiethethuggie @candlewitch-cryptic @yandere-kou @butterfly---bones @epelorchard @strawberrycaramelcapybara + Please fill out my tag list to be tagged in future fics!

#demonic. events #ruggie x reader #ruggie bucchi x reader #ruggie bucchi x yuu #ruggie bucchi smut #ruggie x mc #ruggie x yuu #ruggie x y/n #ruggie x reader smut

[iztea]

They still feel off specially the eyes i could feel them about to manifest their own life and run off

Even my linework is ... Idk what's wrong and it's the problem maybe I'm staring too much but I don't think so

Sorry for bothering alot but i loved your last advice ty

i think the main problem with the first picture has to do with the proportions and anatomy of the lower body area aka the neck and shoulders. i'd make the shoulders wider and add some sort of form to the neck so that it looks believable instead of a flat rectangle shape ( maybe make it slimmer a bit too? although that might be just a stylistic choice so you do you). That's the first thing i'd fix because otherwise the head looks too big in comparison to the rest of the body, and it can throw you off

I actually think you did a great job with the eyes, they have a lot of life and that comes from the fact that they are the most rendered part of your piece, which is not a bad thing. The thing is, while it is true that the eyes are the main focal point of a face and portrait in general, that doesn't mean you can neglect the other parts, so i think it is also a consistency issue or not figuring out exactly what sort of style or rendering you want to go with that holds you back (which is totally fine and normal ofc). So let's pick a semi-realistic stylized rendering style for this since this is the vibe i'm getting from this piece.

If that's the style we're going for, then the face should have a bit more form. You have to remember that our facial features ( eyes, nose, lips) are connected with each other via the planes of the face, right? So, for a semirealistic style, revisit your reference and try to idenitify what those planes are and how they connect to those features, and most importantly, where the shadows hit, and just accentuate them more, because at the moment they look like 3rd forms plastered over a 2d surface which is not right, our skin has form as well. Color-wise, don't be afraid to go darker with the shadows, they really make your drawings pop. Without looking at a reference, i'd def add some shadow under the lips, a bit where the lips connect to the nose, under the neck, and in the lower body area.

I'm really trying to avoid the most basic answer which is " practice anatomy !!1! " because everyone can say that however, at the end of the day, this is the main thing the face lacks. And tbvh you don't have to actually know anatomy, you just gotta know some proportions things that make the face look believable enough. I feel like the features are mostly just drawn from the reference without an understanding of the structure behind it. Something tells me that in the reference picture, the person had their head tilted a bit upwards, but here it's kinda flat and the features are just painted without following the motion. Try to draw over your reference picture the vertical and horizontal lines and make up the head shape behind it to figure out the way it is tilting and facing, because the lips, eyes nose, etc will follow that same sort of flow, they're not stationary. I'd also make the eyes a bit smaller, or maybe make the skull bigger bc i think they are touching the outer edge too much now, and also narrow the distance between the nose and lips just a bit. Kinda hard to explain without actually doing it myself. But really, try to play with that, and try getting comfy with drawing 3d forms i know it's easier said than done but..... there really isn't any shortcut unfortunately As for the lineart drawing, yes it's actually pretty solid, i like that duplicate blur thing you did, i'm familiar with that technique and it def has its perks so that's great. Im not an expert on lineart, however here i think there are too many " unnecessary" lines that could easily be omitted (purple). Less is more and all that~ The hair strands at the end feel too stiff and identical (green). If you notice, they all just end in this " V" shape and they rarely overlap thus making the image look flat. Try to break this pattern by introducing more spontaneity aka random hairflies, making the strands overlap, adding more shape variety etc

Make sure that the lines connect properly whenever they meet, and also although you already did it and i think that's great, you can make some lines even thicker, go even further and add even more lineweight. As a general thing, usually, the exterior or contour lines are thicker and whatever it is inside is thinner so experiment with that, you can start from the nose- thicker lines for the nostrils thinner for that nose tip i forgot what it's called and also add thin lines that just hint at the form. Lineart is hardd so i don't blame you, but if you're gonna keep the lineart in, try "shading" with black blocks so to speak, make sure the lineart layer can stand on its own, and pay more attention to the lower part area (neck and shoulders) even if it is less exciting to ink

#ok i lied it's long again #these are pretty fun to do can u blame me #ask iztea #you should also check in with other people don't take my word for everything #but since you asked my personal opinion here u go #sorry for any typos if there are any i'll fix them later #long post