#theres even more to his traumas and such that i dont get into here

[bonebabbles]

I keep starting and abandoning posts that go into my drafts, as I try to stay tasteful about how fucking revolted this part makes me. Like, I'm legitimately unsure if the very relevant trauma I have is making me see things that aren't here

But first we see that Star Flower is trying to ingratiate herself to the group, just after she reappears from chapter 5. Chapter 5 is about how Clear Sky is still abusive towards his son, and she comes in after stroking his ego, stressing how alone she is, and appealing to how she'll be loyal unlike his child. (She glances over at Thunder, directly implying this.)

Now in Chapter 9, she's babysitting and trying to care for Milkweed's kits (in spite of discomfort from Milkweed), taking a wet sleeping space away from the others, and pulling more than her own weight "without complaint." Putting herself through harsh sitations to prove her worth.

All while trying to appear extra attractive to Thunder, and later Clear Sky. Basically every man in power who can "protect her"

Like, am I going fucking crazy? With how we later find out that Star Flower was "promised as a mate" to One Eye's subordinate Slash, is... is that hypersexualization? One of the extremely stigmatized symptoms of sexual abuse?

She goes to find Clear Sky alone to throw herself at his paws, and he's very quickly attracted to how she promises to perfectly obey him, have no needs of her own, and finally be the perfect servant that he desires

"I don't deserve your trust because I am dirt. I understand you because I also regret something. I'd die for you. I'll never betray you unlike those who have."

This isn't manipulation. She means this. The story is playing their romance sincerely. She's comparing "betraying" Thunder by telling her own father about an assassination ambush to Clear Sky's history of child abuse, physical assault, and murder

She believes she's on the same level as this; a monster who murdered a childhood friend in a fit of entitled rage. She was a victim of One Eye who really believes that the way her father used her means she "understands" this monster, deserves this treatment.

And Clear Sky LIKES that.

He likes that she will have COMPLETE FAITH in him. That she will follow him WITHOUT QUESTION. That she will OBEY his orders. That's fucking verbatim, that's THE TEXT!!!

WHILE HE'S STILL CRYING ABOUT "ive tried to atone every day" FOLLOWING THE LAST TWO BOOKS WHERE THE ONLY SHITTY THING HE DOESN'T DO IS MURDER INNOCENT WOMEN

Am I insane?? Am I wrong??? Am I missing something here???? Why the fuck is the fandom takeaway "haha sexy girl steals his dad." Did I read the same book

#Csa mention #Did they once again do a misogyny so hard they accidentally gave their woman character trauma #My tip to anyone in a draining relationship. If your partner fetishizes that YOU would never leave or betray them unlike ''all the others'' #RUN. #There may be a reason their exes cut ties with them and they're praising you for ignoring red flags #Especially when your partner is significantly older and more experienced #Theres nothing noble about constantly suffering for the sake of 'loyalty' #Star Flower PLEASE get out of here you dont fucking deserve this you did nothing wrong #Bones reads dotc #Dotc hate #I thought i was just remembering things wrong when i was adding the subtheme of thunder having a connection to star via abusive dads- #-in my dotc rewrite. But no it's right there. It's in the text and it's something clear is attracted to #I abuse the shit out of my son and he left me once over it #But i can abuse this girl his same age and she won't run. Finally! A victim who won't leave! #And then they become mates and she births at least two litters #Cw abuse #sa mention #EDIT: I've changed the language just slightly #because the timeline COULD work out that starf was an adult when she was promised to slash for a very brief window of time #and hypersexualization is a symptom of trauma resulting from many types of sex abuse. Even that done when the victim was an adult. #it's just more common in CSA

[dirt-str1der]

Sagawa is unfuckable in my head but in my heart he and nishitani had something embarrassing going on

#Listen to my problems #actually i transsexualise characters in yakuza based on one simple rule: if majima wants to hit then its a 65% that the guy is trans (if he #DESPERATELY wants to hit then its a 100% chance the guy is trans) the percentage rule doesnt apply to girls because majima doesnt believe #in unattractive girls (and shes right) #i will never date an ugly girl. why ? because ugly girls dont exist #let me get to the heart of my post anyway . i was randomly assigning cooler genders to yaluza characters when i actually looked at my list #and was like ... this ... this is !!!! majimas fuckit list !!! and theres already two dead guys on it. too ass #ill make it clearer actually sagawa being majimas handler does act a bit possessive and intimate towards him but he holds zero desire in his #heart for the poor boy even if he had to handfeed him for a while and it was super sad but majima on the other hand absolutely cannot #control where his dick compass swings and starts lusting after the guy more than twice his age plus he just got ‘rescued’ by sagawa <- its #just a simple passing of the leash from shimano to sagawa though and majima Knows this logically that hes completely forgotten how to act li #ke a human being and this is really dumb and he really shouldnt but hes extremely susceptible to his wild imagination and nightmares combo w #here hes trapped in a maze of his own libidio and trauma and against his will sagawa gets his sex engine roaring even though he hates the gu #y and thinks he sucks and it Really doesnt help that sagawa knows and lets majima know hes politely pretending hes not getting hard #stop reading btw im going to start talking about my creature of the night au wh actully no im not actually yes i am #but since majima goes wolfmode every full moon and he though his memories are foggy he can still Remember. and sagawa fucking loves animals #and a wolf is no different he really has a soft spot for wolfjima and spoils him a bit and majima gets trained against his will and itswired #deep enough to bleed over into his subconscious even when hes human and can remember that he hates sagawa but its hard to actually... hurt #him especially since in this au majima fucking bit him and sagawa let it slide. like he nearly got his arm torn off and had to wear a cast #for months and he never once blamed majima for it (soft spot strikes again) despite everything and despite how awful he is majima kind of #realises that sagawa (in his own way) is acting with majimas ‘best interests’ in mind <- extremely subjective statement #the thing is that he really respects him for that and trusts him not to pull the trigger on him when he doesnt ‘deserve’ it

[krashoutluv]

Arkham Knight Relationship HCS !! <3

( light nsfw, mostly SFW tho!! )

literally my wife ( i made this pic idc abt creds i just wanna talk abt it)

SFW !! <3

dying on this hill when i say basically any red hood would be soo yummy with a civilian or just someone who is extremely balanced.

im a red hood needs more fucking normalcy in his life TRUTHER.

relationship starts off slow, romantic and platonic, you need to be patient with him long enough for him to get over his mental dilemmas to feel ANY-TYPE of way towards you.

more then like 6 months lets be real yall

his way of bonding is quality time. ill die on this hill, especially at the start of the relationship. Nothing huge maybe just spending a couple extra minutes around you before leaving.

next is probably gift giving, esp with early relations, probably just gonna order you food or put fifty bucks on your countertop. you dont even notice until you realize you find a fifty around the last place he was standing. expect deliveries from R.H whenever he feels bad for something.

doesn't like being around for too long, feels like he's messing up something. ruining your day by keeping you up late (he was there for fifteen minutes), ruining your mood, (there was an awkward silence for like 30 seconds.)

not a overly conscious thought process though, he feels physically he isn’t supposed to be there. for whatever subconscious thing he picked up on, a awkward silence, or hes been there 15 minutes too long or something

well sometimes he'll mentally beat himself up.

he spirals a lot, needs someone to pull him out of that.

i think when he needs to be grounded, its not just comfort its making him feel alive in the present moment. he's never gonna truly forget about his traumas but maybe for just an hour or two; running around an arcade, walking around the city. just making him feel normal, yeah you BAGGED his ass quick.

he needs someone patient, really patient, someone whos very attentive and empathetic. (but not a complete push- over def needs someone to set him in line still)

i think if you move to quickly, he'll get super snappy and ghosting you,, ong put ur hands on him too early and he's left hooking you.

yeah you're waking up and the first thing your hearing is "Its been 12 years..."

second thing you hear is "you've been in a coma for.. 12 years."

third thing you're hearing is, " we think a bus hit you...”

obviously not touchy, even when he is settling down. hes just not sure how to .. or where to .. or why he wants too.

please his mental gymnastics get so crazy, just sit down with him and put on some silly ass movie so he stops

when he’s settled he cant pry himself off you though.

a lot of his expressions can definitely be told by his body language, naturally hes tense but theres certain habits he has when he's maybe thinking too much, or fustrated/irritated.

but he does all of the same for you, comfort, love, as much as he can he tries

Very attentive, has a mental list of 'shit you do when somethings wrong' or 'shit you like.'

doesn't consciously make any of these mental list, he just knows.

"didnt they say they liked this?" He pauses "shit ill just leave it at their window."

so he's like canonically smart as shit.

you have too much work from your boss or professor? hand it over its done in less then two hours.

literally buys you groceries and pays your bills (fucking lover boy.)

arkham knight finally figuring out how to ask for a hug (hes been dead silent for 5 minutes) (link) <— insta reel

HES A CHEM/HISTORY NERD FOR SURE

NSFW !! <3

probably- A FUCKING VIRGIN !! HES A NERD !! GETS AWKARD AS SHIT. WITH RAGING COMMITMENT AND TRUST ISSUES !! (will still die4you tho)

AGAIN, not in a "my soft squishe potato always been scared of sex" way but in a ‘oh my god hes so unsocialized’ way.

yall ever see a big ass dog just..standing.. literally him (hes dissociating)

genuinely dont believe that when he was arkham/training to be, he was sexually or romantically involved with anyone. the last thing that was on his mind was actually pursuing a sexual or romantic relationship.

along with his trauma, he just wasn’t comfortable with any of that.

ghosted so many people..

couldn’t flirt for more then five minutes, just stopped feeling it or got uncomfortable .

I AM ANTI ARKHAM KNIGHT BEING A SEX GOD

not that he’s horribly awkward, but he’s noticeably a bit more quiet for first times.

ofc this man has watched porn n’ shit but hes smart enough to know thats not what its really like.

he’ll still figure it, what makes you tic, what you love, what makes you most comfortable.

kinda shitty at dirty talk, just makes him buffer.

he gets better at it tho, too damn good

gets so snarky and confident about it too uuhgrr

late relationships hes smirking and chatting your ears off cause you know hes gettin you turnt.

he has a love-hate relationship with his scars. 95% they remind him of his past, but 5% hes alright with them because they’ve shown what hes been through.

deep, deep, deep, deep, deep down, he knows hes fine as fuck. TRUST YALL.

again, super observant and attentive. really pays attention to what you enjoy.

I genuinely don’t believe hes into super hardcore/painful kinks or anything.

Sex for him is definitely a way of showing his trust and intimacy with someone!! Let him show you how much he loves you and how much he wants to make you feel good! Do the same to him !!

mmm tell him how good hes doing and hes a absolute mess!!

praise him! PRAISE HIM *im yelling from the hospital bed im strapped down on*

wouldn’t let you ride for awhile, but once he’s comfortable with it ,, he’s actually obsessed.

cant see him bottoming , just wouldn’t be comfortable with it

my brain is getting messy so im stopping here! feedback and comments would be cool if you wanna drop some!

#jason todd #jason peter todd #jason todd x reader #arkham knight x reader #arkham knight #arkham knight smut #jason todd smut #jason todd headcanon #arkham knight headcanon #jason todd hc #red hood x reader #red hood smut

[rzyraffek]

Slashers with y/n that just gets along with everything

Like slasher could litteraly kill somone near y/n and she would be like alr alr whats really important is that you are happy🤠😎. Im sorry that first 2character had super long headcanons while last ones have way less :( I had no ideas Request open!

Billy Lenz

He always expects some sort of negative response when he calls people and when he heard new voice on the Phone he got even more exited cuz new person new reaction! He totally didnt expect her to just go "yeah yeah sure buddy, anyways... how is your day man? Cuz im so so tired...*starts normal converstation*

He probably tries to stay in character but he is so caught of Guard he doesnt know how to react really (hehe the table has turn)

Now he kinda hopes that she will pick up cuz shes very intresting😈 billy likey

"Ew its this creep again! He is asking for you y/n? Of please dont tell me you befriended him??" "So what? He said hes favourite fruit is strawberry he cant be that bad!" *billy saying slurs on the phone*

You need to constantly tell him that, no Billy no harrasing women isnt sexy, you arent quirky, you are mentally ill

"Y/n i killed that bitch that was gossiping about you 🧍 " "👍good for you billy im glad you found healthy way to cope with that negative emotion😇" "on god"

His whole moral compass is created around the simple question 'does it hurt y/n?' .1:no it doesnt so feel free to do it .2 do not do it, she will ban Billy from sweets (bad ending)

The man from hush

This guy. This dude. This Little gremlin. He is upset that he gets no reaction! Like please oh please act all angy when he 'acidently' shot tire in her car! But oh no ofc no, she had to be like "oh its okay honey i have backup in garage🥰" hes like HHUH SINCE WHEN WE HAVE GARAGE

Like tbh thats how i imagine how they met: he saw her, he wanted to hunt her, she was so chill that she didnt even leave her household while the power was off and he went inside and just saw her having lil nap on couch. 🧍🤨erm exuse me gurl im trying to roleplay epic hunter here tf

He probably kidnaped her cuz she was too weird to just kill her but he didnt want to risk her calling police. He probably tied her up and yeeted her on backseats. And then she begun judging music on the radio"yo big guy can i get some good music taste?" "What? Whats wrong with Taylor Swift?"

He will overshare everything to kinda check where is her limit if it comes to being chill "yeah so i killed this old lady.." "im sure you had good reason🥰" "🤨... anyways... yeah so i was drinking some redbull when some guy said i look ugly so i shoot his head off and-" "HEY HEY hold up geez you CANT drink Energy drinks?? Bestie you know it is unhealthy?? Also you like hunt for sport it will ruin your condition!? How you gonna shoot people with shakey hands?? You crazy or something?" "Damn😔"

Micheal myers

I tried to put him here but i realised he will be as chill as her.

Like he can give her gifts covered in blood and she' just going to clean it and wear it like nothing happened or completley ignore it

He cares about this stuff as much as y/n so like not at all. I mean tbh theres is a bit of difrence: shes at least positive about it! Like "yeah micheal go for it, love🥰😇 i know its hard to cope with trauma take it all out alr?" Shes trying to be a good supporting gf not her fault she never had serial killer bf!

Brahms Heelshire

He lives for attention! What do you mean the war crime he commited this lunch break is okay!?!? Baby pleasee

But this negativity disapears the moment he realised he can get a lot of positive attention when he will do some nice stuff! "Oh honey I didnt kill any rats today" "oh that's amazing brahms I'm sure you and the rats inside walls will get along well soon🥰" (rats in walls bully brahms)

Please complement him or he will get a tantrum and destroy something

Brahms and rats have very hard past i might do seperate hc about that

Ghostface

"Look babe! My newest victim *shows photo*" "ugh baby...😰 you NEED to buy new camera or watch some youtube tutorials about how to take good photos" "aw man whats wrong with my pictures 😔"

Otherwise y/n supports his hobbies! People need to grow😇 (and he needs to grow up)

If theres 2ghostfaces(like in most movies) they will bet money on how long you gonna keep this 'do whatever as long as youre happy' act. Well they didnt know that this wasnt an act but her personality

Also they will probably try to use this chillnes aginst her like "oooh y/n something terrible happened! I crushed my car oh what will i do!" "Alr bestie i will drive you over there😇" "😈omg you are so nice i totally didnt expect that(heheh i dont need to pay for gas today (hes very evil))

#slasher x reader #slasher headcanons #billy lenz #billy lenz x reader #brahms heelsire #brahms x reader #micheal myers #micheal myers x reader #ghostface x reader #ghostface #hush headcanon #hush 2016 #hush x reader #the man x reader

[bulbabutt]

if i can be corny for a second i wanna talk about the greatest strengths of the 2003 tmnt series and why it speaks to me (esp as a queer person)

so i might have alluded to this before, but let me say it outright: each show is definitely a product of its time, and the ideals of whatever generation its from. whether talking about the humour, the story, the dialogue etc, its always important to remember that these shows will always come off in a way due to the generation theyre from. and thats not a bad thing! it just means its important to think about them from that perspective.

2003 is a show of my generation growing up, and a thing about that era that maybe some people younger than me wont understand is there is so much more language commonly available to describe yourself now than there was then. you can take this in any context; mental health, sexuality, gender identity, or even just the ability to describe your relationships with more (idk if this will be the right word) therapist language.

in 03 we have a family unit of splinter and his sons, each with their own strengths and weaknesses. we have a splinter who hasnt opened up to his sons about the trauma hes experienced, but not in a way of shutting them out, simply because it isnt their responsibility to know as they are teenagers. he tells them of the mutagen that created them, but not of his past with his master yoshi, who he calls father when by himself, but never around his sons which is just an interesting concept to think about.

(i do not intent this next sentence as ragging on the two shows after this when i say it, simply from a character standpoint) this is the splinter who completely doesnt make his problems his sons problems, but he also is very willing to tell them the truth when he knows they're ready. this is is the most idyllic version of splitner out of all of them, even when comparing to his mirage counterpart (who hes the most based on) due to that splinter raising them to be ninja specifically to make them fight shredder. this one is just their father who loves them and wants to keep them safe the best way he can, and he was never a human in the first place to even know how to be that. so this whole family dynamic starts with him, and the way he raised his sons reflects his parenting.

so, the setting and year this show is made is 2003. something very relatable here is how there isnt a lot of language for the personality quirks of the turtles. there's so much evidence here for mikey having adhd, his brothers will say things like "why doesnt mikey have to help?" and the answer is "well, he'd be bored. and whats worse, mikey not helping or mikey being bored?" its this beautiful moment of, "hey, we know its not fair, but thats how mikey is, and its better for everyone if we just respect that thats how he is" mikey cant keep his hands off stuff, they know this they dont yell at him for behaving that way, they just stop him. this coding feels the most specific, but like i said. its 2003. we dont have the words to describe what this is yet, and if we do its not common knowledge.

another example is in the classic episode where raphael meets casey jones. raphael is sparring with mikey, and he lashes out and nearly kills mikey. everyone reacts to this by getting him to stop, and no one is more upset than raphael himself. they all tell him to go get some air, which he does. theres no moment of any of them screaming at him for losing his temper, its very clear that they all know he's going to do that himself. and he does go get some air. they all know thats what he needs. he goes and meets casey jones, another hot head, and raph has to help coach this hot head on his anger. when he comes back at the end of the episode after having let out that aggression, he apologizes and no one is upset with him. there's a very clear understanding among his family that he cannot help it, but the best thing they can do is give him his space when he needs it. watching this from a 2023 perspective (20 years later) im sure we could analyze this as a few things going on with raph, my mind comes to autism but at the end of the day it doesnt matter why he behaves like this, the point is that he does and the best thing his family does is just...help him. which they do. and they never hold it against him.

when leo is going through his ptsd arc hes at his closest to raph as a character, the show draws a lot of parallels (like having him go let out some aggression with casey) and we get to see the dynamic in reverse. in "i, monster" (the rat king episode) leo is losing it, taking on rat king alone and not wanting to let up. raphael is actively holding his brothers back when they say "we shouldnt leave him to fight alone", raphael says "if leo gets in trouble i'm the first one in there, but right now it looks like leo's got more than one monster to work out of his system" raph doesn't exactly know what leos going through, but he recognizes it. he knows he needs to fight alone, so raph lets him. its only when the building collapses and leo is no longer in a safe position that he says "leo lets go", which leo wordlessly agrees with and actually listens.

this is what i think is the best part of these guys, the unconditional understanding they have for the way they are. we still have our "raphs a big hot head" "mikeys annoying" jokes, but they feel like genuine good natured sibling ribbing because they know each other on that level.

and to go back to the fact that this show is set in 2003, there's something so specific about the way mikey constantly makes references to liking women's clothing, to being fine with feminine language, and to being open about being the pretty turtle who "has that effect on minds of men" speaks to me as a queer person. this could easily be intended as homophobic jokes and probably is, because again.... its the mid 2000s, thats very much what media was like, thats what the jokes were. especially with the girly screams mikey does being one of the first jokes of this nature.

but theres something that happens in season 4, where an alien is attacking mikey, and donnie rushes in and says "hey, thats my sibling" that sticks out. and it happens again in fast forward. when talking to the dark turtles leo says "you and your brothers" "me and my siblings"

because of the way this family unit just understands each other without ever having a conversation about things, it feels like its not a joke. theres some kind of affirmation happening here. even if it seems like i could be reading into it too much, its specific! and it keeps happening!

and by the end of the show, when mikey says he wants to be maid of honour, even if that line in the media itself was intended to be a joke, no one in their family treats it like one. of course mikey is the maid of honour, he asked to be one! the only real offence taken is when april says bride's maid, to which he is offended because hes so much more important than that!

so from a story standpoint, this show doesnt have the intricate complexities and butting heads of latter iterations, there isnt much relationship growth to be had (in fact once we get to around season 5 the flanderization of the characters kind of begins and it loses some of the more complexities) but thats because its just not the focus of the story! the story is more about what they go through together, and thats fine! thats what our shows kind of were at the time. not saying there isnt any relationship growth, but its very much not the focus because these turtles? they already understand each other in a healthy way.

so to me, these guys are kind of the most wholesome family unit

#tmnt #tmnt 03 #tmnt 2k3 #tmnt 2003 #2003 tmnt #can you tell im in my late 20s #lmao #this is why i did the silly st thing #cuz its relatable #thoughts

[mayxo-hxh]

As autistic coded as Illumi is, he is also EXTREMELY Bpd coded. Here's a thread abt why that would be, from a person with bpd. 🧵

Everything about his character screams a person that feels so so much but forcefully tones his feelings down so hard to the point where they seem nonexistent.

On the exterior he seems like he couldn't care less about most things and is a very calm and controlled person. However, his emotions shine the brightest when the topic of interest is a person he cares about.

This is ESPECIALLY shown in the election arc where he reveals much of his emotions to the audience. He gets two whole bloodlust scenes this arc.

One with extreme anger

and one with extreme joy.

When Hisoka provoked him, it took absolutely zero transition for him to immediately spike his bloodlust and aura to GREAT amounts to the point of engulfing the entire MOUNTAIN and reaching Killua from SO far away.

And in the same exact second it happened, it ended just as quickly the moment he noticed Killua running away. That is a CLASSIC negative mood swing example if I've ever seen one. One extreme emotion in one second, gone in the other.

On the other hand, his second bloodlust had a small transition, one that still did not give you the expectation of what truly came after.

He is seen watching Killua on his phone and the moment Nanika healed gon, showing Killua can use her on command with no consequences and also showing her immense power, he was absolutely overjoyed. So much in fact that he exploded in maniac laughter and aura a second after merely giving it a small laugh.

We get a hint at his bloodlust incoming in that moment, but NEVER predict just how MUCH would actually come out. Classic euphoric mood swing number two.

When he encountera Killua with Hisoka in the background at the end, he is pretty much shown going through the five stages of grief in mere minutes the moment his own butlers turn on him and allow Nanika to come out.

denial, anger, depression...

bargaining.......

and finally, acceptance. acceptance that he was going to be traded by killua not only for a friend, but for the rest of the family's lives.

He was so very clearly unhappy about it at the beginning, yet came to acceptance in mere seconds the moment nanika came out. He bargained with himself, Killua shouldnt be able to wish twice, then accepted. even if he could, thats okay. go ahead, kill me!

and then theres also the way he just switches from a very :DDD to >:| mood in like one panel short hello he is so coded

Even more; Usually bpd is either caused through trauma or inherited. and you can definitely argue that illumi went through enough "training" for the former but. is his behavior not. familiar to yall. not at all???? im just saying......... I know someone else in the zoldyck family that has intense mood swings!

if there is one person in the family that shows their unfiltered emotions and switches from being calm to screaming in distress in a single second, its going to be this woman. she gave birth to a son thats a literal copy of her. she ctrl c'd and ctrl v'd.

and i dont exactly know what this next one has to do with the thread but why was bro normal for one second then turned into this i mean im not complaining hes still hot and ill claim him as my bpd son regardless

anyways yes this was the thread have fun with this interpretation slash analysis however u like 👍

#hxh #hunter x hunter #illumi #illumi zoldyck #my post #my analysis #hxh analysis #hunter x hunter analysis #character analysis #bpd

[rindouspuppygirl]

gn!reader x ran : recovering from trauma + dealing with mental illness (hurt/comfort)

was feeling down, so i wrote ran haitani comforting gender neutal mentally ill reader!

TW: mental illness, implied suicidal ideation, mentions of abuse, mentions of therapy, reader masking, gender neutral

ran can tell somethings wrong, when you get home. he always notices. youre the type to mask your feelings, hide the frustration and sadness coiling in your chest... but youve been dating long enough, you cant fool him anymore the cheerful "hello" and tight hug from you dont convince ran. even your little peck to his cheek as you grin and ask about his day... your eyes seem empty. he can see how close to breaking you are

ran knows you try not to do this. its a longterm habit from dealing with toxic and abusive relationships - you cant break it overnight. still, it hurts... less because its a lie, and more because ran knows even you dont realize how much youre hurting.

but he can tell you need to decompress, so he doesnt push... not yet. offers to cook one of the few meals he can make without your help (hes trying to be independent, but hes a lazy spoiled brat) and you accept ... but the sparkle in your eyes is dull

ran does what he can. runs you a bath before he starts dinner, picks out your favorite towel and comfiest pjs. he lights that candle you love but never use, and drops in one of his prized lush bath bombs while hes at it. puts on a relaxing spotify playlist... at this point, youve caught on. still... the hard shell youve donned starts to melt, even as ran leaves to cook ran isnt as surprised as he should be when you glom onto him from behind while hes cooking, freshly bathed and smelling like rose. hes thankful the sauce just needs to simmer.

he also isnt surprised when theres a wetness on his back he knows is tears, not bathwater. he hums softly, turning off the stove burner before picking you up and carrying you into your shared bedroom

ran gently runs his long fingers through your damp hair, murmuring reassurances and praise as you sob incoherently about your stressors. you are so strong. you want to do the best by everyone. its alright if you make mistakes...

clinging tightly to him, warm and safe... it feels like the anchor you could only dream of for so long. youre in therapy, and you do everything you can. but you need support, and ran does everything he can to help

your life is so much better, but maybe that is scary, too. you dreamed so little, didnt believe youd get far. and ran and your friends believing in you is terrifying. you sometimes feel undeserving.

but here, buried in ran's warm embrace... the smell of his home cooking, his cologne and signature smell, the bath bomb he shared with you...

your breathing begins to calm, albeit your chest aches. you smile up at ran with teary eyes. he smiles back.

it will be okay, after all... it really will.

#ran haitani #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyorev x reader #ran haitani x reader #tokyo revengers #tokyorev #zoey originals #long post #fics #? #ran #gender neutral reader #gender neutral

[bitchimasnake-sss]

tumblr au. ft aot characters!

girlypop im obsessed with making these and theres nothing you can do to stop me. basically, what if aot characters had tumblr? [set in between the time skip period, pre-rumbling]

🐥freedomyeager

oh your friends gave you chocolates? mine gave me ptsd and trauma

🔁🐴jeaniejean Follow

bro you literally lost one uno match why tf are you so fucking emo?

🔁⚔️micasasucasa

eren, stop staring at the ocean and get your ass back in here or so god help me.

345 notes

📘arminarlet Follow

You know what's weird? That typically, I am a "cutie-patootie" but then I do a little, mild, psychological torture to my enemies. And suddenly, I am a threat to the nation. Y'all switch up so quick.

406 notes

👨‍🦲baldspringer Follow

when you enter a dick-riding competition but your opponent is @flochyou

🔁🚩flochyou Follow

you're just mad daddy doesn't like you 😒

🔁🐥freedomyeager

dude how many times do i gotta tell you to stop doing that in public?

🔁🍖sashahaha Follow

hes allowed to do that in private???

#yeagerists exposed

41,032 notes

⚔️micasasucasa Follow

is it normal to have re-occurring dreams about your dead parents or friends?

🔁🩳leviackermanofficial

yes.

🔁👱🏻‍♂️braunreiner Follow

yeah

🔁📘arminarlet Follow

I've asked Commander Zoe if the Scouts can afford to send you all to therapy but she said "fuck no, i dont even have money to eat shit." So, looks like you're all stuck like this. Sorry guys.

3,512 notes

🐴jeaniejean Follow

they call me a horse cause all the girls wanna ride me yeehaw🤠

🔁👨‍🦲baldspringer Follow

dude, blocked.

🔁🍖sashahaha Follow

blocked.

🔁👱🏻‍♂️braunreiner Follow

blocked.

🔁⚔️micasasucasa

blocked.

🔁👑 ymirsgf

and reported.

675 notes

😴leonhart Follow

i swear to god if @baldspringer played "annie, are you okay?" in frong of my crystal one more time, i will break this crystal and come punch him square in his egg-shaped head.

🔁👨‍🦲baldspringer Follow

i was literally trying to keep you entertained. but anyways annie, are you okay?

🔁🍖sashahaha Follow

are you okay, annie?

🔁👓officialtitanlover

@leonhart HOW ARE YOU TYPING IN THE CRYSTAL?

👓officialtitanlover

My son is officially entering his emo phase. Today, he said "ruskin ready to rumble" while staring at the sea. It's literally so funny 😂😂

🔁🐥freedomyeager

ITS LITERALLY NOT A PHASE, I WILL KILL EVERYONE

🔁🩳leviackermanofficial

Have you lost your mind? Do i need to kick you in the face again?

🔁🐥freedomyeager

... no 😞

141 notes

a/n: jean is a loserboy and i love him. only i am allowed to slander him.

#attack on titan #aot #attack on titan final season #snk #shingeki no kyojin #eren yeager #levi ackerman #hange zoe #armin arlert #aot fluff #dash simulator #fake dashboard #aot au #jean kirstein #jean kirschstein #connie springer #sasha braus #aot final season

[charlottan]

What are your best book recommendations? Fiction and nonfiction both welcome

THANKS FOR ASKING 😁!!!!!!!!!! i have no clue what sort of reader you are so here are just a few of my favorites

first off i simply Must tell you about billy summers by stephen king. its a thriller about an assassin whose last job is a setup. classic premise. but hes also a writer and has War Trauma 😲 i read this book faster than anything in recent memory or maybe ever at all- like half of its ~600 pages in a week which is an INSANE pace for me. cannot recommend this enough on the offchance that its your thing even nearly as much as it was mine. it feels weird calling it my favorite stephen king over Everything Else ive read from him but but it kind of earned the title i guess LOL

then i need need need to recommend house of leaves. not much to say about this one its just really good especially towards the end, and not just because thats when the Gimmick of the fucked up text gets more intense lol

then of course slaughterhouse five by kurt vonnegut<3 or breakfast of champions or sirens of titan!!! you have so many good vonneguts to choose from you can hardly go wrong (just dont start with player piano)

then a book thats kinda weird but Really Interesting is dhalgren. by Samuel R. Delaney. its a speculative fiction sci fi from 1975 that touches on topics of race, sexuality, and gender, in an Evil City where some mysterious apocalypse happened (it is never explained What Happened) and a bisexual half native american man called Kidd must have as much sex as possible. its really really cool. plus the last chapter has fucked up text kinda like house of leaves lol

another great book is hitchhikers guide to the galaxy! again not much to say, this is just a classic for a reason

then theres piranesi by susanna clarke!! its about a House (castle) with many many rooms that one mentally ill Special Boy must uncover the Secrets of. really dreamy sort of book i wish i could smoke weed with Piranesi

another book i love is the name of the wind! fantasy book by patrick rothfuss about a boy who loses his whole acting troupe family and decides to pursue magic. its a liiiiittle bit male chauvinist and purple prosey in an annoying way but the magic system is really interesting and the characters are great

speaking of fantasy theres also discworld<3 just pick a book u cant go wrong

so there you go:) hope you find something you like among these, or even anywhere else, because reading is a beautiful adventure!!!

#asks #book talk

[borzoilover69]

hiii, its the guy who asked for help on jake!! i read through all the posts youve provided and i feel sufficiently more melancholy.

you know that one post that goes "you fell for the character's facade that is meant to be dismantled by the viewer" ? that was sort of my issue. i knew that there was some ruse he was upholding, i just... didnt know where it ended and where he started, i guess? and if i know that i dont know things, theres probably a lot that i DONT KNOW that i dont know about him. id seen some analyses of him regarding necrophilia (blue beauties) , how grandpa traumatized jade in some way she has repressed to infinity (meteor size=trauma size) and that provided... precisely no insight on his character for me. like nothing was clicking in my brain. i felt kind of stupid because all i felt towards jake was a) pity towards him being a narrative punching bag and b) that he was kind of an asshole. i mean, he is both of those things, but it was pretty unfair of me to acknowledge only that part of him when he is so much more. and regarding being more i guess now it makes me feel strange? how harshly he judges himself and pushes himself in the most over-the-top convoluted fashion to try and be MORE and it doesn't really happen. nothing really happens for the better?

i dont know how to put this or if im even correct but its more than just one charade he's playing (?). there's the repression of his true feelings, and on top of that a belief that there is no repression here no sir, and on top of that is his manly adventurer manic dreamboat pixie persona (i believe is what you said?) that even he tries to fall for ("if you believe in stuff with enough gusto it imbues that stuff with a pinch more chutzpah even the fake stuff!" man come on) but please correct me if im wrong lol im clearly rambling about nothing

You have no idea how happy this makes me!! Yes youre really getting it now!! Believing with petrol as one might say!! Hes so crazy. I love him. Im happy the resources helped you a lot hes my favourite character ever!

The way he pushes him is insane because he worries about the wrong things and then becomes tunnelvisioned about it so doesnt see the blaring problem of that actually his friends are bothered about something so much more serious! He is an onion. Trying to believe in the facade he puts up and comtinuing to be daunted by “is the thing under the facade really worth much?” Which i think is so interesting!! Please ramble more about jake if you need to. Im happy :)

#homestuck #hom3stuck #jake english #borzoi talks #borzoi meta #asks

[naisaspalace]

TAROT READING WHATS COMING NEW AFTER THE NEW MOON?

pick the pile that have your moon sign OR the pile the you felt attracted to

< take only what resonate > :)

1 - or water signs ( scorpio , cancer and pisces )

alright this will be i guess hard for me to say because i dont really think i will be able to give you good news but i will give the message that has shown up. you finally started to work but the money kept going away kept getting less and less for some reason and you end up having a bad judgment and decided to get involved with a man and that really destroyed you because you had imagined this dream where both of you could be enjoin a good life with comfort but he left you and that was the beginning of your downfall. right now i see that this situation impacted your work life and even tho you know what do to (like you know with what you can work to get you money) you're feeling sad and feeling suspicious of people around you and dont want to find the same type of man you also feel kinda scared of getting hurt by men again.i see that you will have to go thru other transformations until your mental health gets in a better place again and you will also eventually enjoy something even if you see such comforts as not what you desired on the first place i advice you to take care of your mental health and to be grateful and to not loose hope and to stay away from trying to have a relationship until your heart feels better again. good luck water signs.

2 - or earth signs (capricorn , taurus and virgo)

earth signs i see that you're trying to be alone and really enjoy yourself and start this new path but theres a problem you're not actually being "alone" or at least not working towards what you had plan you might think you're but is not the truth and i see that you're not looking after wealth in fact you have enough the problem is that you're looking to someone to enjoy such wealth and thats the damn problem i know that you're feeling very lonely right now and that youre feeling tempted to invite people to your new path or at least share with others but you're doing totally wrong because it need to be a secret and something that you are going to commit alone … the gold will keep coming regardless but you are actually bring misfortune by inviting people in. i see two paths either you actually commits and stay alone and achieve your spiritual goals or you go after people only to end up with more delay because you know that your heart is not ready yet your heart is right now with too much pain and trauma. good luck earth signs.

3 - or air signs ( libra, aquarius and gemini )

hi air signs i see that a lot of stuff is going on your life! lets unpack here i see that you were walking a business path alone and suddenly you met a person this person seemed to be a good person the perfect partner to your eyes but this person betrayed you or at least you interpret what this person did as a betrayal but both of you went on separated paths each with their part of the deal feeling like they're are now alone. currently you are desiring to be a king or at least enjoy a good amount of wealth but its not feeling like working at all or at least having motivation or courage to work you're dreaming about the riches of the world while having to feel betrayed and right now you're emotions are not well they're are very awful. i see that on the future you will encounter a few opportunities that will end up being good but you will feel tempted to choose a path where you will not work as hard and will end up loosing everything and the other path is where you first start to feel grateful for your current situation and then go to work even if youre not feeling like it and this path will reward your gold. good luck air signs :)

4 - or fire signs ( leo , aries and Sagittarius )

hii fire signs i see that something really bad happened to you recently that changed your life and made you loose your hope on your dreams luck feels like its acting against you and because of this now you're feeling without strength and has lost faith on justice i mean you feel like the justice did not helped you are all and you're wandering wheres justice now that i need it? well fire sign i have to tell you something you are the one whos going to have to do your own justice you're going to work extra hard to help the needy to help those who cannot afford nothing this is how you're going to balance your own luck and actually bring justice by helping others grow and build youre going to build your own fortune and luck and will be blessed and i know youre feeling too much emotional pain right now but right now is the perfect time to work again and win and to help those who cannot win alone win as well. good luck fire signs

for contact information click here. thank you.

i am also at twitter.

#naisaoraclereadings #tarot cards #tarot reading #tarotcommunity #pick a card #pick a pile #pick a picture #reading #general tarot reading #divination #tarotblr #astrology #vedic astrology

[suffarustuffaru]

what is your opinion on the fact that tappei intended us to hate reinhard for killing theresia

hello!! :o im not sure if tappei really Intended for us to hate reinhard for that per say—i think more so tappei intends to show the astrea drama in general in a very nuanced manner (unless he proves me wrong and does weird stuff to develop them later on wjfnd but ill stand by this atm because theres a lot of textual evidence i think!!)

the arc 5 astrea drama is the very first time we learn about Any of that, and the way we learn it is interesting. this is AFTER getting attached to reinhard and wilhelm, who prior to arc 5 were established to be good well meaning and respectable people. then heinkel comes in claiming they both did shitty stuff, and of course heinkel makes the worst impression of all time, is shitty himself, AND interrupted wilhelm and reinhards reunion, so we’re not inclined to side with heinkel here. but the more we learn about the astrea family conflict, the more we realize, alongside subaru, that 1. wilhelm is not as great as he seems to be (its like learning that a close family member or friend has done some terrible stuff!! the common reaction to it is to feel Disappointed or Sad or maybe a little angry!!) and subaru also learns that 2. the entire situation is not black and white. it takes a heavy emotional toll on wilhelm, heinkel, and reinhard.

it’s also interesting that we dont Always learn info about it directly from the family members themselves—theresias dead of course and doesnt say much when she briefly comes back (more on this later), reinhard becomes more subdued around his family (which has gotta be a trauma response in an attempt to minimize the conflict), heinkel and wilhelm are unreliable narrators driven by their emotions. we learn some of the bulk of the drama from JULIUS, an outsider, but someone with ties to reinhard personally and the knights. so we’re also getting unreliable info about someone like heinkel (whos got a reputation thats honestly shittier than even his behavior, which i pity him for), and someone like reinhard is extremely hard to read (we just know that hes. you know. Traumatized. and Sad.)

i DO think though that throughout all of this we’re supposed to sympathize with EVERY astrea family member. every single one. we’re meant to understand each of their actions, because they all contribute to the family dysfunction unwillingly or consciously.

we’re given the reasoning behind almost all of their actions in the conflict. wilhelm lashed out because of grief, and hes spent years regretting what he did and not knowing how to fix things. heinkel’s an alcoholic from stress, trauma, and self-hatred, and post-arc 5 we see more of his psyche (which is shown in a very honest sympathetic light as well, hinting at heinkel getting future development and most likely a redemption arc). heinkel then lashes out (which is a Sad pattern in this family given wilhelm also does that... and its implied that heinkel is also like this Because of wilhelm's influence) to deal with all of this too (and because he Genuinely thinks those things now. hes a sad bitter man). we also know from side stories that heinkel used to be a good man who truly loved reinhard, and we do know that heinkel still loves louanna and has spent YEARS searching for a cure. as for reinhard, he was a CHILD (five when it first started!!) throughout almost all of this conflict, and hes the youngest member of his family and still young even as he’s grown up now. and he certainly didnt Intend to kill his own grandma when he was five, and he definitely deals with the guilt of all that years later. he shuts down around his family in the present, for one. and two—reinhard was failed by his family members, who have been ADULTS for the entire conflict and are his father and grandfather respectively. if anything, reinhard has the least blame here. he was a child!! a child thats been conditioned into serving the kingdom at All Costs to himself!! heinkel and wilhelms grief is understandable but it should not cost them their literal child!! they were the ones with the responsibility to pull themselves together and they failed to do that!!

but then reinhard kills theresia.

the thing with reinhard killing theresia is that reinhard was very much not wrong for that. tappei takes the time to show corpse soldier theresia going after heinkel and wilhelm—both of which are too weak in this moment physically and emotionally to stop theresia, WHO IS THEIR MOTHER AND WIFE RESPECTIVELY. and iirc wilhelm was also injured by her. heinkel pisses himself in fear while begging for her to stop—or something along those lines. its Terrifying. and it shows theresia, as she was in that moment, is a threat!! what else was reinhard going to do?? if he doesnt apprehend theresia, shes going to kill the rest of their family T^T

yeah so. reinhard kills theresia. afterwards, heinkel and wilhelm give reinhard shit for it but again, they were going to DIE if reinhard hadnt stepped in. and its clear that reinhard is saddened by what he had to do, even as he says that the corpse soldier theresia ISNT THERESIA. and reinhard is technically kind of right!! that was a corpse soldier!! she was both theresia (her last words to wilhelm are proof of this) and Not Theresia (she already died years ago!! this was a reanimated corpse!!).

its wilhelm and heinkel that misinterpret reinhard’s demeanor as him Not Caring. because he does care, but reinhard has always had an uncanny personality—likely partly because of trauma (remember how i said he shuts down a bit around his family? common trauma response) and partly because of reinhard’s endless divine protections giving him a very. Unique. perspective on everything. so reinhard has difficulty with connecting with others because of all of that. hes Really hard to read, especially in a complicated situation like this where its basically a lose-lose for everyone involved. wilhelm and heinkel are blinded by their grief and fear and anger and because reinhard 1. killed theresia, 2. said that that Wasnt Theresia, and 3. said he didnt regret killing theresia and 4. said that he did the right thing (which is probably because, again, what else could he do, theresia was going to kill heinkel and wilhelm)... yeah so wilhelm and heinkel read reinhard as being cold and unfeeling and callous so they both completely give up on reinhard in this moment. the coffin is. metaphorically and literally closed here, reinhard killing theresia (again. for the second time. if youre heinkel and wilhelm) was the very last nail.

and ultimately like. again, tappei gives us All the narrative tools to understand each member of the astrea family in this conflict. tappei also even notes the detail (iirc. in like a qna somewhere. if someone can find it or whatever please feel free to add!!) of theresia, on her death bed in arc 5, had nothing to say to reinhard and heinkel. its kind of. weird. when she makes SURE that wilhelm knows that she loves him but she doesnt even bother with her son and grandson - and heinkel does note that she looked at them "hatefully" (which. heinkel is an unreliable narrator, but its interesting for tappei to include that detail because heinkel also goes "she looked at us like That, who else could that be but mother?"). so uh. astrea family dynamics are complicated, have likely always been complicated even before everything went wrong with them, and tappei also gives us theresias full backstory in her pov in arc 5. AND he shows that the corpse soldier was still. Theresia. in the end. its extremely complicated. tappei takes the time to show that with every detail.

so anyway. yeah i feel like we're meant to sympathize with everyone in the astrea family. theyre all people with their own flaws, theyve all contributed in some way to the conflict whether they like it or not, they all have various degrees of blame, if you really want to go into whos the Most Guilty for all the dysfunction. even poor louanna contributed indirectly via falling into a coma T^T

but i dont think tappei means for us to like hate any of them. just because tappei Always shows how complicated the situation is. tappei is Always sympathetic to all astrea members as much as tappei also often calls them out for their flaws (heinkel is the most obvious example, tappei also does it with theresia and wilhelm a bit, and reinhard is shown to be a bit stilted in social situations with a habit of stomping on other peoples boundaries sometimes without realizing or because he thinks its for the other persons good, etc). and as much as i love making jokes at wilhelms expense because he did fuck up quite a Lot with his family (same with heinkel... and im a little sus of theresia but she Did care about heinkel in the past, we know that from her named chapter)...

like. i can understand where someone like wilhelm is coming from. do i hate him for lashing out at his five year old grandson and helping turn his son against his grandson? oh yeah. yeah. but i can Understand why he did it and i feel bad for him, which i think was more so tappei's goal here. so the audience can hate any of these characters if you so feel like it, but tappei means for us to deeply deeply get where they're coming from and why they did what they did. so maybe its more so that we're not supposed to hate these characters, maybe we're just supposed to hate Their Actions and wish that things didnt turn out that way. because it couldve been better at any turn - wilhelm couldve just not lashed out and blamed reinhard when he was five, heinkel couldve also pulled himself together, louanna didnt have to go into a coma, theresia didnt have to die twice, etc etc. but thats the point of it all i think. it turned for the worse but all we can do is try to think about How it turned out this way. and i pity all of them, really.

plus, reinhard, wilhelm, heinkel are 1000% getting some kind of further development with this, i'd say. and rezero is Repeatedly about forgiveness and growth, so yeah. i absolutely dont think we're supposed to fully hate any of them. if anything, im rooting for their growth before its. you know. Too Late. but yeah thats just my extremely long opinion/feelings on all of this, people are totally free to disagree of course :o !! hope that answers your question though!!

#rezero #re:zero #ask #reinhard van astrea #theresia van astrea #wilhelm van astrea #heinkel astrea #arc 5 spoilers

[tsams-confessions]

Okay ive seen a LOT of hate on ships here and as a multishipper, I wanted to put my two cents in and some out of five stars (I would like to state, with Moon questioning his aroace identity, ships are a bit iffy, but so long as he doesn't outright say he's aroace, I believe he feels some form of romantic attraction)

SolarMoon - 2/5:

its alright, I can see the healing relationship trope, and respect it, but the way they're portrayed together is either codependent on each other or just... So distant. plus, Moon is questioning his aroace identity so my opinion changes on this matter as his identity does too

SolarSun - 3/5:

Genuinly pretty cute, I support it. I love seeing hurt/comfort for the two, both grappling with theur trauma and losing the only person who cared for them at the time. Not really a reason for me to dislike it, just not my favorite.

Eclipse/Anyone - 0/5:

Okay, I know, I know, I just smashed every ship with Eclipse in it together, but theres a reason. One, he just kinda feels aroace to me, and a personal bias, I want the guy dead. He just sucks. I never cared for him, never will.

Lunar/Solar - 1/5:

This would be a 0, however Lunar has said, hes not a child, and his familial relationship with Solar isn't set in stone, but if they end up being related or adopted or whatever, 0/5, same goes for any other incestial ship

SolarRuin - 4/5:

I KNOW RUIN PLAYED EVERYONE LIKE A FIDDLE BUT HE DIDNT IN MY HEAD AND BESIDES, THE TWO OF THEM ARE SO CUTE TOGETHER. And when Moon told Solar, that ruin had tricked them all, the pain and disbelief in his voice, it was just so raw and emotional

Monty/Earth - 4/5:

Not all for it, Monty could be better, but honestly, really cute. I get that Earth was rushed into things but like, that happens sometimes. Unfortunately its part of life, but I think she kind of needed a non familial relationship with someone so Monty was the best thing

Monty/Moon - 3/5:

Okay so this one is iffy, early Moon and Monty, 5/5 PLATONIC partners, loved the sassy friendship, the general toxicity, and all. But New Moon and Monty? Yeah, I kinda ship it, its cute, the banter, everything. Again, if Moon identifies as Aroace, thjs becomes nonromantic, but they seem like they could have a good platonic relationship. THIS IS CONSIDERING THE FACT THAT MONTY AND EARTH ARE NOT INVOLVED

Monty/Sun - 3/5:

Again, only early sun and monty, cause now they dont have that same fling together, but early show Sun and Monty was so cute and honestly it could have happened. Im a glitter golf enjoyer outside of TSBS though, so might be biased.

Gemini/Lunar - 4/5:

Okay, I love Gemini, theyre onr of my favorite characters, and I love their relationship with Lunar, only reason why its not 5/5 is because it always feels a bit more of a Castor/Lunar thing, Pollux just never seemed all that interested which is fair

Sun/Foxy - 5/5:

Honestly, its my favorite ship, even for the joke, its still unnecessarily funny and cute

FoxyMonty - 0/5:

No

Sorrg For Any misspellings, its past midnight and I've got work tomorrow

.

#sun and moon show #the sun and moon show #tsams #sams #tsams confession #< block this if you dont want to see these #mod 1blood #ask to tag #do i tag this as solarmoon debate? its only mentioned #if anyone has an opinion here lmk

[blood-injections]

Saw killjoy au infodump post!! Its danger days but my special little bloody guy is there! When I eventually write it it'll be centered around Adam and it mmmight be chainshipping I'm still deciding.

So the bathroom trap. still happens. adam lives in battery city and to make ends meet he takes pictures of people for people, doesnt matter who, he doesn't ask questions. He's taken jobs from better living to follow suspected rebels and hes taken jobs from rebels to follow some high-profile better living person to get more information on them before they take them out. He stays just off the rader and keeps himself just barely useful or not suspicious enough as to not be put into scarecrow training or something. Because he doesn't like better living, but he has to make ends meet. Jigsaw picks him because he thinks hes pathetic and hates how he doesn't pick a side, his tape says how he doesn't take his pills but he cant even bother fighting for anything. he could do anything with his free will and he chooses to throw his life away and this pisses jigsaw off. so will adam watch himself die, throw his life away once and for all, or will he finally use his free will to fight for something? Because in this au jigsaws motive of teaching people to value life comes from being under better livings control instead of having cancer, because better living is a cancer, really. so yeah jigsaw and co. are technically killjoys lol.

Lawrence is still in the trap too. hes a scarecrow who has stopped taking his pills and is becoming aware of his actions for the first time ever as well as coming to to a family, to a wife he cant remember falling in love with, they were probably set up by the city. He has a family, he has a kid, but its all been fake, does he even love them? can he? and hes haunted by the blood on his hands but he wasn't into control he cant really be a murderer if he wasn't in control, right? right. jigsaw even agrees. but hes also a sick bastard with a grudge against better living so he doesn't care. maybe Lawrence wasn't a murderer, not really, but now he will be. by the end if the day there will be blood on his hands that he can no longer deny or write off as someones elses actions. because to jigsaw it doesn't matter who was in control, lawrence still pulled the trigger. No matter what lawrence does, if he kills adam or not, there will still be deaths on his conscience, because he needs to learn a lesson, how it feels, how to be scared. he kills adam and his family will be spared. Don't kill adam? its his family that will die instead. but how can he choose? two people or one. two he thinks he loves, hes supposed to, but he hardly knows them, or one person that he might be falling in love with the more that adam begs for him to stay.

in the end he doesn't have to choose(well. not completely. the shoulder bullet prob still happens lol) and they both make it out because fuck you. also just so you know, in this au jigsaw is Dr Benzedrine and the apprentices are the suitehearts and that will absolutely come into play down the line with a possible frankenghoul cameo, the franken bit the result of being a victim of a trap of his own.

anyway adam, after nearly dying, after realizing he wants to fucking live, has never had plans before but now hes like fuck it, im getting out of here, im getting out of this freaky city with creeps like jigsaw apparently running around. he isnt taking any more chances. So he gets out, he becomes a killjoy. and theres the whole trauma bonding thing so he probably takes lawrence(who is still struggling with the am i a murderer or not thing and thinks he doesn't deserve this second chance. he'll accept it eventually) with him. i dont have any of lawrence's killjoy thought out yet i'll come up with some stuff later it also probably depends on if i decide its chainshipping and if hes even out there or not like i might just fucking adam stanheight final girl it like fuck it he wasn't doomed by the narrative his hacksaw didnt break or he found another way out of his chains and the roles are reversed or maybe he even fucking killed lawrence before lawrence could kill him who knows, i dont lol. theres so many possibilities.

anyway adam stanheight killjoy. his name Hacksaw Jagger(working title) because hacksaw. you know. and jagger because a jagger is another term for a vouyer and i think thats clever. also adam could be a fan of the rolling stones and hed be like lol reference. but yeah, Hacksaw Jagger. depending on how things went in the bathroom he may or may not have a prosthetic leg. he dyes his hair at some point and to me personally. its the worst brassiest ugliest bleached tips youve ever fucking seen and probably like little liberty spikes at some point because. punk adam as well. you agree. anyway he looks pathetic and i love him. he definitely gets into racing at some point and also learns he has a thing for arson and explosives. so yknow. hacksaw+fun ghoul besties at first boom at some point. i also think it'd be fun if he joined/started a band but thats a conversation for another day maybe another au.

anyway thats it for now. also yes, i absolutely fuck with his gender. you're welcome.

#killjoy adam stanheight au #<needs an actual name but thats the tag for now #adam faulkner stanheight #ttlotfk #the true lives of the fabulous killjoys #danger days #corvidscrap #killjoy saw au

[definitelynotshouting]

you've talked before about how the watchers are going to go extinct at some point in the future due to being competed out of their ecological niche by the listeners. which got me thinking. couldn't... something that might prevent that... be... whatever doc's machine is going to be? LIKE. don't get me wrong that would not be a good or workable idea for many, MANY reasons on ALL sides here. it's not like the continued existence of the watchers as a race is even something that literally any character in the fic, including and especially grian, even actually wants, like grian would be jumping for joy if you walked up to him and told him the watchers are gonna go extinct. but like. it's coming to me that the eventual endpoint of the fic is that grian's food issues are taken care of and he will be secure and well-fed for the foreseeable future, while the rest of the watchers as a society are doomed to slow extinction via starvation. which just. idk. makes me feel stuff.

Tbh i also feel things about this-- theres a very grim undertone to the whole au when you really look at it beyond Grian's experiences. It is, i think, at its core a quietly bleak concept, and i dont blame you for having some weird feelings about it. I dont necessarily set out to make those canon ofc, but sometimes the worldbuilding leads to these kind of conclusions, and its definitely very gut-wrenching when you really think about it

Ideally, yes, Doc's machine would be able to feed the Watchers-- though whether or not they'd accept that solution is a different story. I think the best way i can give some insight on this is via an analogy; think of, lets say....... livestock. You're a keeper of livestock, and one day one of your cows comes up to you and offers you a limitless supply of raw potatoes in exchange for not eating cows anymore. And like-- you could!! You could do that!!! Potatoes are nutritionally capable of supporting the vast majority of your needs, food-wise, but theyre just. Raw potatoes. They taste bad and they're ultimately very boring to eat day after day. And maybe if you're looking to turn vegan, you'd take this offer in less than a heartbeat. But your average person is not gonna wanna give up dairy or steak, or their livelihood. Its kinda like that-- the Players are a food source for Watchers, and barring that, a cradle for Watcher larvae.

I think ultimately Grian wouldnt like. Be jumping for joy at the concept of the Watchers going extinct-- i think his reaction would be far more complicated, marked by both compassion (he's starved-- he knows how terrible it is) and fear (they are the main source of his trauma). Like i just generally think his feelings on the matter boil down to "i hope i never have to see them again, they can go exist over there as far away from me as possible" if that makes sense. But i wouldnt say he'd be cheering for their deaths-- just that once its clear Listeners are competing them out, it'd be a foregone conclusion to him. A very objectively sad but inescapable inevitability :(

#shouting speaks #asks #hunger au #grian #evo watchers #watcher grian #watcher!grian #mcyt #worldbuilding #txt

[vanillaxoshi]

Boom badabim bada pow

Welcome to septuplet au! Also now called injuries matter au

Where i make the elements into siblings but despite this being done but a bunch of people let me make this my way or-

Maybe a similar way ig

What you see above is Cahaya and daun

There aint no way Cahaya will become just fine after being hit on the head and the abdomen or gut by a giant hammer and flew thhrough metal floors? Ceilings? (I know this happened to boi but dont drag him into this. this is also a septuplet au he aint included but dont u dare get ideas👹👹👹)

And he got thrown to space twice, very high or low temperature causes dead cells and stuff (welcome decayed skin)

So- yeah, he got into a longer coma so to speak, perhaps the actual logic into this is death but lets not get into that and just do 2-3 months folks

According to google said symptoms for frontal lobe damage are:

Weakness on one side of the body or one side of the face, Falling, Inability to solve problems or organize tasks, Reduced creativity, Impaired judgment, Reduced sense of taste or smell, Depression, Difficulty controlling emotions, Changes in behavior, Low motivation, Poor attention span, being easily distracted, Reduced or increased sexual interest, Odd sexual habits, Impulsive or risky behavior, Trouble with communication

And vocal chords get damaged with cold temperature so-

Kk, hes not completely incapable as he heals overtime(note: not completely), but trauma with the dark :> oh how will that help if he doesnt sleep well :)

(he uses sign language if he needs to stop speaking)

ALRIGHT moving on to air

Dude got his arm melted off by roktaroka i think thats his name, which very much hurt because lava, is still slow, which meant it was slow and painful, and with it being put on ice immediately (yes this situation summoned ais) it left quite a huge mark

And he also cant keep the ice hand for so long so bros ambidextrous just uses left the most now, might have trauma from long distance attacks and perhaps hot temperatures, so you could say api is trying his best for air and that goes the same for air to api

LETS GO DAUN

Yes he gains a type of inferiority complex so he has to be included and does his best, but not only that, he gains lightning scars from kirana, on his hands, so he has trouble controlling those hands

They will randomly end up shaking sometimes, and randomly drop as in become paralyze, this resulted to a lot of things to become broken, and this is where daun feels bad for gaining this problem, and at times might hurt like theres still lightning striking him

OF COURSE petir feels bad and blames himself for getting caught like that haha-

Bro also got caught or kidnapped three times he blames himself for repeating that situation a lot.

ANGIN well, i know the fandom makes him love yaya's cookies, but imma be honest here, those things basically drugged him into drugging everyone, he for sure gained fear of those cookies. That made him out of it

Buuuuut what if as well he has a temptation to eat it at times, despite his whole mind not wanting to, so when he does end up eating it he becomes nauseous and vomits :)

API doesnt like seeing fear in peoples faces but that never washes away bc of his anger issues that causes people to be afraid so lets go low self esteem-

Tanah wants his brothers to be more better so thats why he shoves all responsibility onto himself but that also causes trauma!!!

Hes so afraid of losing them that he became very strict which causes to some arguments but he also tries his very best to look tough and be more capable, but there are times where its obvious like with movie 2, api and air try their best to help him despite him pushing them away and being in denial. Gopal was the one who did end up calming everyone down

Angin is the one who sees him always and is always the one who conforts him

Petir feels even more down knowing that hes the oldest and that he should be the one to take that burden of responsibility.

And yeah i might add more but who knows

#boboiboy #boboiboy galaxy #rambles #thoughts #bbb septuplet au #boboiboy petir #boboiboy angin #boboiboy tanah #boboiboy api #boboiboy air #boboiboy daun #boboiboy cahaya #yes trauma #bbb injuries matter au