Tumgik
#fake dashboard
sedgewick-gayble · 6 months
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1920s tumblr simulator
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🎞 noirsuatoir Follow
Private detectives useless as hell all I do is sit behind a desk dramatically lit in black and white stripes by my half open blinds and smoke cigars. Living the dream
#privatedetective #detectivelife #i have 19 unsolved cases
( 10,552 notes )
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🎷 aceofspades Follow
prohibition hitting hard...making some bathtup gin tonight. DM for recipe
🎷aceofspades Follow
hopital
( 65 notes )
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🔘 deactivated-341925 Follow
Clara Bow is 20??!!!
🔘 deactivated-341925 Follow
SHE SHOULD BE AT THE SPEAKEASY
( 979 notes )
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🎙 fancy-nancyboy Follow
Smuggling some moonshine in my coat oh boy I sure do hope no big scary prohibition officer comes andbpins me and handcuffs me hahha oh nooo that would suck
#wink wink
( 4,208 notes )
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🍸 gladragz Follow
my thirsty ass could NEVER be a bootlegger!!!!
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🚬 runrummer Follow
Anyone else think some of those jc leyendecker drawings are kind of yaoi ....
#those arrow collar advertisments got me feelin smthn #jc leyendecker #jcleyendecker #jcl
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📻 flapperfanny-fan973 Follow
she speak on my easy till I jazz
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39K notes · View notes
jimingyue · 4 months
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Cat Tumblr Dashboard Simulator
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🖋️ meowful-musings Follow
🕊️ birdwatching Follow
what's wrong with dry food??? my humans feed me it all the time and i think it's fine
💀 elusivehider-deactivated948204
op wheres the natural feeding option
🌲 outdoorsy Follow
you guys are getting fed?
#im a barn cat so maybe im missing something here #meowtthew don't look
7,192 notes
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☀️ pawsitive-affurmations Follow
ITS OKAY TO BE A MOGGIE
ITS OKAY TO BE A MOGGIE
YOU ARE NOT LESS VALID IF YOU ARE NOT A SPECIFIC PEDIGREE!!!!!
☀️ pawsitive-affurmations Follow
extra special shout out to cats who have "common" coat colors. grey tabbies and black cats i am rubbing against your head affectionately <3
🪤 m0usetrap01 Follow
as a grey tabby i really needed to hear this :"3
#i feel like i never see positivity posts for moggies even tho we're the most common type of cat....
154,688 notes
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🎵 rage-against-the-meowchine Follow
i cant believe there are cats ACTUALLY advocating for kittens to be separated from their mothers before 12 weeks??? kittens still need to learn how to interact with other cats before being placed into their furever home omg you guys know you're advocating for undersocialized and aggressive cats right
❤️ loving-paws284 Follow
um op some of us??? matured early??????? i was separated from my mother at 7 weeks and i turned out fine... interesting how you assume that kittens being separated from their mothers at a younger age will lead to the degeneracy of the next generation...hmm i wonder where i've heard that before...
🐈 fluffy-the-cat Follow
OP got bit too hard during a play-fight as a kitten and it shows XD
🐟 tunafeesh Follow
also op have you ever considered that just because somecat is kind of scared and unable to deal with strange cats or humans, it doesn't mean they don't deserve to be adopted?? you sound like a vet psyop honestly
🎵 rage-against-the-meowchine Follow
oh meow god saying that kittens should be fully weaned before leaving their mother is NOT veterinarian rhetoric and i never said that they deserve to be euthanized!!! my mother literally died when i was 3 weeks old and it seriously messed up my development so stop putting words in my mouth, thanks
anyway friendly reminder that underweaned kittens are prone to illness and often struggle with basic cat behaviors like litterbox usage, and in some nyavinces it's even considered kitten abuse
#discourse #cant believe "kitten abuse is bad" is controversial now
32,456 notes
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🍃 naturalliving Follow
BORN TO DIE
WORLD IS A FUCK
猫神 Kill Em All 1989
I am trash cat
410,757,864,530 DEAD BIRDS
#outdoorliving #outdoorcats please interact #outdoorcat friendly
48,971 notes
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🎣 salmonpurina Follow
can't believe cats are uncritically reblogging that born to die world is a fuck post. i know it's funny but op is literally an outdoor cat truther
#like cmon now you just have to go to their blog #lulu speaks
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💀 tabbystripes-deactivated098712
gentle reminder that pushing cups off the table is not cute and can cause a lot of distress in your human!!!! gentle reminder that our teeth and claws can easily hurt them more than they can hurt us!!!!
🐰 evil-tabbystripes Follow
evil reminder that the cup should always be pushed off the table. evil reminder that you should always bite and claw at your human no matter what. you can do whatever you want forever
💀 tabbystripes-deactivated098712
make your own pawst
💀 laser-point-deactivated8574721
umm i know a tomcat who did that and his human ended up putting him down so...
👬🏻 nyasunaruenjoyer Follow
Nyaverage shelter cat behavior
#not nyaruto #re-nyab #pickles shut up
545,460 notes
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🌈 nyaoi-warrior Follow
saw two male cats sleeping together on the porch today. homeow behavior imo
💡 discourse-meows Follow
hey um what the fuck??? it's really not okay of you to go assuming other cat's sexualities, especially cats you don't even know???? as a queer cat i'm VERYY uncomfortable. real-ass cats didn't consent to your nyaoi fetish, thanks
🌈 nyaoi-warrior Follow
1. i was making. a joak
2. i'm literally gay???
#literally what's your pawblem
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🎩 amazingcatshow12 Follow
reblog if you've ever caught the laser pointer
🎩 amazingcatshow12 Follow
i know you fuckers are lying
🍭 gaykittens Follow
this tom hasn't caught the laser pointer
🎩 amazingcatshow12 Follow
shut the heull up
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🐾 b-e-a-n-t-o-e-s Follow
grey toebeans >>>>>>>>> pink toebeans and don't let the haters make you believe otherwise
🐁 ladymouser Follow
op shut the fuck up ALL toebeans are beautiful!!! just bc you're miserable and insecure doesn't mean you can bring others down based on things they can't control
🐾 b-e-a-n-t-o-e-s Follow
oh so the cat-human separationist wants to preach to us
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nerdicorntheshipper · 3 months
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If colors had tumblr
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🍀 greenasthegrass Follow
hate when yellow gets all the credit for being a primary color when it's literally r G b
⭐️ mellow-yellow Follow
uhh... i literally am a subtractive primary. like yeah it sucks that you don't get the recognition you deserve but you don't have to put down other colors
🌷 majestic-magenta Follow
at least you're on the color wheel :(
159,903 notes
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�� cyan-ide Follow
I hate colors whose hex codes start with F. It's literally such a red flag
255 notes
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🔍 clearasday Follow
not absorbing light, not reflecting light, but a secret third thing (letting it pass through me)
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🔮therealroyalpurple Follow
you're in her dms, i'm a fundamental part of her personality. we are not the same.
541,094 notes
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🍎 rubyred Follow
if you can't be represented by a wavelength of light you're not a real color
🌷 majestic-magenta Follow
this is literally so toxic wtf! colors that are perceived only when the short and long cones are activated together are valid!
🎱 blackasmysoul Follow
tired of ppl telling me i'm the "absence of color" and therefore not a color myself. like you don't get to choose how I identify!
980,195 notes
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🎱 blackasmysoul Follow
why is everyone saying that orange is the new me. I literally haven't gone anywhere
🏀 thecolornotthefruit Follow
sounds like a skill issue????
765 notes
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💎 cyan-ide Follow
stop saying me and blue look alike!!! we are literally different colors!!!
💙 therealroyalblue Follow
yeah i'm so much hotter than that
💎 cyan-ide Follow
fuck you
106,399 notes
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thank you for coming to my tumblr post
8K notes · View notes
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good lird they did not make a gimmick blog about a real life murder
#someone fucking DIED but whatever who gives a shit it's funny i guess
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🥚 eggvidenced Follow
honestly with how suspicious and confusing everything on the dl-6 case was i wouldn't be surprised if it came out that it was that prosecutor guy tbh
🌟 rockliker270 Follow
date posted: june 23, 2010
1,834,853 notes
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⚖️ courtofpublicopinions Follow
🌟 rockliker270 Follow
ok hear me out. what abt winston payne though
🧊 just--ice Follow
okay now they're just making lawyers up
#also didn't mvk die or something?
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🔥 triedbyfire Follow
why the fuck are you people still posting about the gavinners as if theyre not copaganda. didn't the guitarist get convicted of murder
🎸 guiltiest-lovers837 Follow
so fucking tired of this "um um didn't daryan get convicted of murder" YEAH AND HE'S LITERALLY NOT IN THE FUCKING BAND ANYMORE. dipshit
🔥 triedbyfire Follow
are you gonna address the copaganda thing or
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🌻 attorneybout Follow
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he's so. 😳
📂 trialanderror Follow
why is he defending
📂 trialanderror Follow
OP WHY IS HE DEFENDING???
24,374 notes
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🦈 giantlakemonsters Follow
i just wanna hear about another gourdy sighting thats all
🥜 liberdeez Follow
op. i'm so sorry op. gourdy isn't real you have to let her go. they had a whole trial about it.
🔐 wrightorwrong Follow
hi!! so this isn't actually the case as while gourdy was briefly mentioned in a trial, said trial had nothing to do with whether or not gourdy was "real" per se as much as. well. murder, actually. while gourdy WAS found out to be an inflatable steel samurai this was not brought up in the case at all as the veracity of gourdy wasn't really as relevant as the fact that the witness was looking for gourdy rather than at the murder she claimed to have seen. plus this was also a relatively small part of a MUCH larger trial which for those interested not only solved the dl-6 case but ALSO marked the end of prosecutor von karma's ~40 year long record and the court records are really a fascinating read through!!
🦀 mad_libz_87 Follow
net 0 information post
#thanks again lawblr
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🍒 cherriescoola Follow
btw i was at the park the other day and klavier gavin (of gavinners fame) was there and obv there was a huge crowd but this guy was there with him and at some point he (the other guy) waved to the crowd and someone still screamed like it was klavier??? who was that guy ive never seen him before in my life
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🩸 has-dl6-been-solved-yet Follow
December 28, 2016
YES!!!
702,947 notes
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🪙 tellerlikeitis Follow
guys help i'm a bank teller and this guy just introduced himself as robin banks what do i do
🔪 violencekilling Follow
you gotta let him rob you that's the law
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👻 ghostesswiththemostest Follow
look if i ever get convicted of murder im just hiring the lawyer with the coolest sounding name
💼 courtofwaw Follow
bestie if you already got convicted it is Too Late
62,193 notes
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📋 lawandwhoreder Follow
guys i know it's real fun to think people just can predict whatever but if you look at the earliest reblogs of that post that "guessed" the true killer in the dl-6 case it was actually a post about how they didn't want to go to the store. clearly edited
#stg nobody bothers to factcheck anything anymore
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🐺 lawnewolf Follow
i am NOT homophobic or whatever the fuck you guys are saying now i just think its weird to write fanfiction about realass people?? go touch grass ffs
🌈 lawsbian Follow
the fun police (this guy) putting me in yaoi court but the lawyers (phoenix witrght and miles edgeworth) just keep trying to make out (real court is like this too btw)
🐺 lawnewolf Follow
YOU HAVE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU.
#look idc what your enemies to lovers fic bullshit says #they're straight. and more importantly REAL PEOPLE. #there's TENSION because they are in COURT and there are LIVES on the LINE. #not because they wanna fuck. god.
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🔮 inhighspirits Follow
why dont they just ask the spirit mediums to ask the victims who killed them this law shit is easy
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💞 lawveyourself Follow
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seriously i cant believe they gave this guy a law degree
💞 lawveyourself Follow
what do you mean evidence fraud
503,893 notes
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🎧 instrumentalillness Follow
fuck you *unguilties your love*
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🎀 copiicat Follow
perjury isnt illegal btw in fact if youre one of tge witnesses youre legally required to lie on the stand. thats why everyone does it. trust me
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analog-kidd · 3 months
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If Fire Emblem Had Tumblr
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🪄child-of-elimine Follow
This is a reminder that practicing dark magic will always be dangerous, evil, and very problematic!
🌑purplegaymagic Follow
Oh fuck off,, NOT ALL DARK MAGIC IS INHERENTLY EVIL!!!
Yes certain types of dark magic can be dangerous but ITS NOT EVILL!!
🖤the-elder-mage Follow
First of all op, you're from elibe so you should know that the preferred name for dark magic here is elder magic.
Second, op is a dragonphobe and supports the g*nocide of all dragons.
(4,322 notes)
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❤️️crimsonrider Follow
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henlo,,,
👼talyspeggy Follow
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henlo!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(25,434 notes)
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🪚sidecharater121 Follow
Me watching my friend getting warped to Zenith for the 5th time in different clothes cause they were popular
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🌪wimdymagey Follow
wdym you dont need a tome to summon magic in fodlan and valentia??????
🌪wimdymagey Follow
Im over here flipping thru the pages of my book for my life hoping my head doesnt get caved in by a hand axe!!
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🌘nohrian-cum Follow
Wait... weapons can break????
⚔️myrmigone Follow
YOUR WEAPONS CANT BREAK!?!?!?!?
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🪵chopinheads Follow
Hey guys! I'm a fighter about to promote!
Should I promote to warrior or hero?
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🗿the-real-axe-man Follow
Godssssss
pegasuses are such misandrists. wtf did i do to you flying pony??
Pegasuses arent even usful, they litterally get one shotted by an archer with 5 strength.
👼talyspeggy Follow
Literally not every pegasi breed "hates" men.
Go to Hoshido if you wanna see men riding pegasi.
I'm so sorry that certain pegasi were born not wanting a man to ride them.
(344 notes)
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😷helpfulheals Follow
Hey guys @/begnionianloverss is a laguzphobe and supports the s*renes m*ssacre saying that "they deserved it"
😺ran-the-catboy Follow
Oof,, thanks for informing us, I have friends who follow that account, gonna tell them that info immediately!
(99 notes)
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🏰armored-general Follow
Can myrmidons shut up abt their crit rates???
Yall cant even do 1 damage against me, how tf that crit rate gonna help you???
⚔️myrmigone Follow
Flame Sword
Levin Sword
Wind Sword
Runesword
Sonic Sword
🏰armored-general Follow
with YOUR 3 MAGIC???????? LMAO!!!! stop coping and admit that myrmidon is a shit class
(649 notes)
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🏹no1-archer Follow
Heard that @flameempire was hosting a bbq at belhalla, very excited!
🏹no1-archer Follow
THAT WASNT A BBQ THAT WASNT A BBQ THAT WASNT A BBQ THAT WASNT A BBQ THAT WASNT A BBQ THAT WASNT A BBQ THAT WASNT A BBQ THAT WASNT A BBQ THAT WASNT A BBQ THAT WASNT A BBQ THAT WASNT A BBQ THAT WASNT A BBQ--
🐉divinedragonfanclub Follow
wtf is happening in jugdral
(2,038 notes)
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🚫anti-crest-revolution Follow
Gods I hate people with crests
Privileged mfs
⚡️zapanddash Follow
Brooooo my crest literally randomly summons a thunder storm whenever im around.
I was in khadein (a literal desert nation) a while ago and in the middle of THE HOT DESERT DAY A FUCKING TORENTIAL RAIN STORM APPEARS!!!
That is not a privilege
🌑purplegaymagic Follow
OP you literally have a crest! how can you say you hate crests when YOU HAVE ONE YOURSELF!!!! SMH
(34,667 notes)
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🧙‍♂️gotohs-big-naturals Follow
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I can fix him
💐eirika-erica Follow
No you fucking can't
🐎expthiefseth Follow
No you fucking can't
🐲frenofdragon Follow
No you fucking can't
🪨the-obsidianrock Follow
No you fucking can't
🔱lancemaster22 Follow
No you fucking can't
(2,331 notes)
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🥷ninja-paint Follow
pets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets youpets you
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😺ran-the-catboy Follow
gets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets petgets pet
(776 notes)
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🪙annablr-staff
This website was a waste of money
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931 notes · View notes
haystarlight · 3 months
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What if mlp characters had Tumblr
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🌟 smartypants Follow
I have a princess conference in the morning but that won't stop me from staying up till 3 am on AO3. Mama needs her bedtime stories
🐉 ogres&oubliettesenthusiast Follow
OP go to sleep or I will eat your crown
2,008 notes
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🎈 smilesmilesmile Follow
All of you are like "would you fuck your clone?" hypothetically but, in practice, clones are too dumb to give consent and that's the real reason why I didn't sleep with any of my clones when I had the chance
🎈 totally-not-a-clone Follow
OP you still have a chance
10,000 notes
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✨ great&powerful Follow
It's always "take off the evil amulet! it's corrupting your mind!" and never "oh! you look so pretty in your new amulet!"
✨ great&powerful Follow
Celestia forbid ladies do anything
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😏 sexiestvillaintournament Follow
🦋 Id-like-to-be-a-tree Follow
Um, would you guys please stop voting for my boyfriend?
🌪️ whatfunisthereinmakingsense Follow
I take it as a compliment
🌘 I-have-loved-you-for-a-thousand-years Follow
I am offended
500,467 notes
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🍎 cmc-omc Follow
Y'all know how some families got a gay cousin and all 'em other cousins are straight? Well mah family's the opposite. Ah don't even think we got a straight cousin!
🍎 cmc-omc Follow
Mah sister says we have to assimilate other ponies into our family so the family name don't die out. She would do numbers here
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🌈 20%cooler Follow
GUYS I'M SO SORRY FOR THE DELAYS
I've just been on the hospital (again) cause I got zapped by lightning (again)
But I promise I'll update my Daring Do/Reader fic as soon as I can! Thanks for the patience, love you guys!
🌟 smartypants Follow
It's okay, take your time! I'll just reread the old chapters in the meantime
🐉 ogre&oubliettesenthusiast Follow
NO!!! YOU WILL GO TO SLEEP!!!
120 notes
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💎 chicunique&maginifique Follow
"how are you so good at fashion" well you'd be an expert in fashion too if you'd spent 20 years in the closet
🔔 professional-theatre-filly Follow
My sister in Celestia that closet was made of glass
20,354 notes
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🌘 I-have-loved-you-for-a-thousand-years Follow
Nothing like coming back from exhile just to find your bedroom was replaced by a whole ass forest
Some people have no respect for others belongings
☀️ cake.by.the.ocean Follow
I don't control the growing of the magical forest, bitch
🌘 I-have-loved-you-for-a-thousand-years Follow
Rude
☀️ cake.by.the.ocean Follow
Don't think I forgot about that time in 500 B.E. that you stole my ice cream
200 notes
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🛴 the-agender-acrobat Follow
You can't hurt me I have mommy AND daddy issues I'm unstoppable
🌈 20%cooler Follow
OP do you need me to adopt you
🛴 the-agender-acrobat Follow
I would love that actually
1,554 notes
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💎 chicunique&magnifique Follow
*levitates my cat out of the way so I can use the sewing machine, which I need for my job*
my cat: YOU LIFT OPALESCENCE?!?!???! YOU LIFT HER WITH YOUR WICKED SORCERY?!??!!!! YOU ASSERT CONTROL OVER HER WITH YOUR MAGIC?!?!??! OHHHHH!!! MOTHER IS EVIL!!!!!
🔔 professional-theatre-filly Follow
I agree with the cat
1,827,654 notes
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🥕 Carrot-TOPING Follow
Girlfriend is out of town all week so I'm gonna dye my mane and tail green
💎 chicunique&magnifique Follow
WHY WOULD YOU DO SUCH A THING
🥕 Carrot-TOPING Follow
She's all my self control
364, 245 notes
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🌘 I-have-loved-you-for-a-thousand-years Follow
Back in my day we tagged our fanfiction properly. There's a difference between / and & you rufians
☀️ cake.by.the.ocean Follow
Shut up old lady
🌘 I-have-loved-you-for-a-thousand-years Follow
YOU'RE OLDER THAN ME
30,150 notes
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🩵 girlboss Follow
Sure, sex is great but does *your* husband help you check all your shipping fanfiction for grammar errors? Didn't think so
💎 chicunique&magnifique Follow
She's everything, he's just Ken
🛡️ malewife Follow
Happy to be of service 🫡
2,035 notes
624 notes · View notes
nookisms · 4 months
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What do you think Tumblr in Gotham looks like
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❔ qnanqnanqnanqna Follow
I think the Riddler is just a little guy a little misunderstood I think we should give him some puzzles, that would fix him
💀 banehater Follow
hes a murderer mckay
❔ qnanqnanqnanqna Follow
He just got a little sillae with it 
24 notes
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🦇 bat-sightings Follow
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Black Bat sighting near Wayne Enterprises
🐤 babyrobins-inc Follow
bestie that's a gargoyle 🖤 I know because it's my favorite one
🦇 bat-sightings Follow
💔 I'll get a picture of them eventually
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🪶 is-the-gotham-hero-video-cute Follow 
*Signal has confirmed he was in the We Are Robin movement
#robin count #i think we should let the robins count themselves but my friend thinks the movement should count #discourse #some people get too argumentative about it so just in case
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📸 camerakid64 Follow
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Robin, December 15, 20XX
🔴 redrobinriotround Follow
CAMERA KID! Why don't you have any pictures of Red Robin?
📸 camerakid64 Follow
i don't like him
5,346 notes
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🔆 bruciebattruther Follow
STOP shipping Bruce Wayne and Batman!!! If you keep posting about it they're never gonna get together!!! Start posting about Batman and Commisfjldhsljdhioeurhgdsi
🔆 bruciebattruther Follow
Post Cancelled Oracle Found Me
�� iceiceiceiceiceicebaby Follow
a sniper is on its way to your location. goodbye forever.
🔆 bruciebattruther Follow
You're right o7
12 notes
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🔨 harleyqapologist Follow
Reblog to sign a petition to let Red Hood and Harley Quinn kill the Joker
💥 jrrthood Follow
⬇️ people who hate the joker and want him to explode 
748 notes · View notes
noiselessbuck · 5 months
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Buck's Guide to Making Fake Dash Posts
The general format of a "post" is
😀 emoji for the profile pic
regular text for url/username with maybe -s or _s or a -deactivated[numbers that indicate a date]
optional Follow text with the blue colored text option (if there isnt a follow its implied the reader of the fake dash post is already following them
contents of post
bold text for notes count
post divider image (see below)
example:
😀 fakestoftumblrinas Follow
ummm im new to tumblr this is my first post
3 notes
the ways to make it cooler:
there is an image between this line and the next which is a skinny rectangle thats a fake post divider (works best on people using dark mode but gets the point across regardless)
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^^ feel free to save the image ^^ (as you can see adding an image also adds a blank line above it you prob wanna delete)
i've seen some people put a ♻️ before a users emoji if they are a reblog comment on a post
example:
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🤡 clowncarboy
knock knock
♻️🎭 myharlequinromance
who's there?
2 notes
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tags:
some people have been using tiny text for tags i think thats something you can pull off on the browser but not mobile
you can also use, chat mode, text
or [this type of, thing]
personally i used chat mode as a pretend version of screenshotting tags
go forth! have fun! also tag your posts with at least fake dash if not also unreality so folks don't get unnecessarily freaked out :)
780 notes · View notes
some-pers0n · 2 months
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Dashboard simulator
Mutual 1: i'm so normal right now :33
Mutual 2: (picture of sudoku) fucckkkkk i need her so baddd
Mutual 3: (most gorgeous artwork you've ever seen) just a quick doodle lol
Mutual 1: patrick where are my anti-psychotics
Mutual 4: (mass reblogging posts about a fandom you aren't in and don't understand)
Mutual 5: okay but the way that glimplinko in glippie's googie goople is lowkey a misogynistic pig and the fandom never talks about it needs to be discussed
Mutual 6: (picture of spinkle from glippie's googie goople) i need to impregnate him
Mutual 1: imsillyimsillyimsillyimsillyimsilly
Mutual 7: (reblogging the same post about the eroticism of the flesh until they hit the post limit)
Mutual 8: hey guys here's a really cool piece of art that i spent hours making (12 notes)
Mutual 1: i need to be put down like a rabid dog
Mutual 9: (picture of a 60 year old man) i need him kneeling and whimpering
Mutual 10: if that man isn't on the ground shaking and crying while covering in blood i don't want him
Mutual 1: me when i take 17 benadryl and start seeing the hatman 😂
376 notes · View notes
inkystaar · 4 months
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hey. don’t cry. mafia dash simulator.
canary-in-a-timeloop reblogged
🌟 canary-in-a-timeloop Follow
guys!! angel duo is literally so toxic why are you shipping them :(( and cedar is like!! a bajillion years old and gem’s way younger!!! it’s really weird :((
🪽 angel-certified Follow
You literally ship Bowie/Jordan for goodness sake… Please be quiet.
🌟 canary-in-a-timeloop Follow
oh so now i’m banned from joy and whimsy?? i see how it is!!!
#literally so rude #just because i want a little enemies to lovers??? so toxic
36 Notes
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localshapeshifter reblogged
🍄 localshapeshifter Follow
actually so pissed off that cinth broke the bond with icarus… like yeah it was an accident but he’s still to blame…
💀 cinth-numberonefan Follow
EXCUSE ME??? CINTH IS LITERALLY THE BEST!!!! AND ICARUS FORGAVE HIM!!!
🍄 localshapeshifter Follow
i was going to argue with you but in your bio it says you’re 15…wait a few years, okay sweaty?
103 Notes
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toothrotting-angst reblogged
🪼 toothrotting-angst Follow
any 1 else miss the polycule 😞
like…remember that 1 ship art of them cuddling?? so cute…and now they barely interact…
🥩 twink-of-fortune Follow
op have you considered that they have seen the Horrors? tweaks literally went insane and bowie and gem had that whole drama?? /lh
🎭 fanof-fallenstars Follow
shh…op is living in blissful ignorance
🪼 toothrotting-angst Follow
WAIT WHAT!!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭
213 Notes
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📜 bones-and-braids
did i write another bones duo oneshot? yes.
is it the 6th one this week? …yes
do i miss bones duo? YES!!!!!
#someone save me it’s only tuesday #bones duo #they moved into my brain and won’t leave
12 Notes
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twink-of-fortune reblogged
🥩 twink-of-fortune Follow
AUGH…. BAM….. THEY MAKE ME MENTALLY ILL…………..
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💀 cinth-numberonefan Follow
BOWIE LITERALLY KILLED SAM??? KINDA FUCKED UP FOR YOU TO SHIP THAT!!!
🥩 twink-of-fortune Follow
but it was so heartbreaking!!! and the fanfictions that came from it were so amazing :((( (if anyone has bam fic recs PLEASE please please tell me /gen /nf)
42 Notes
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arson-at-eight reblogged
🪻 arson-at-eight Follow
everytime m!gem swears a little bit of my soul leaves me
🦌 t4t-braid-duo Follow
so do you just not want her to swear LMAO?? it’s empowering
🪻 arson-at-eight Follow
help??? that wasn’t my point???
🦌 t4t-braid-duo Follow
then what was your point? omfg no need to be an ass abt it
🪻 arson-at-eight Follow
omg nevermind this literally isn’t worth my time
28 Notes
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jeanthebeagle · 14 days
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Grishaverse/Ketterdam dashboard simulator
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🪙 Barrelrat1877 follow
just spilled my drink on a Fierdan's boots and now he's threatening to duel me. Should I call the stadwatch??? I'm lowkey scared.
#guys please help me
10 notes
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🐦 Dregsconfessionsofficial follow
SUBMISSION: Last night I was walking around the barrel and I saw dirtyhands petting a dog. Like I'm not even joking, no gloves and all. And it was one of those crusty white ones.
#submission #omg I hope he washes his hands??? # those dogs are so crusty
10,350 notes
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🌊 tidesofthecanals follow
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Final results from 672 votes
♠️ kvasandass follow
Razorgulls stop sending anon hate to op over a poll challenge, level impossible, no glue no borax.
#i hope they get caught for tax fraud
380 notes
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🐝 thislittlelife follow
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A drawing my talented daughter made of Sankta Alina. We pray to her each night 🙏🙏🙏
🐾 magic-tricks follow
46.244.29.14
🍄 thekingofravkaishot follow
hello??? Omg. Why would you dox someone just like that??? This is literally putting them in danger. It's just a sweet mother with her child, who posted a drawing. What is wrong with you.
🏵️ krugebythedozen follow
Op admitted to lying like a year ago about how they don't actually have a kid, but took the post down. It's probably a dime lion trying to troll us like they did in mass when sankta alina died. Also, respectfully, shut up. You posts thirst traps and long drawn out texts on how the king of ravka is "babygirl”. Go get help.
47 notes
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🤝 theholyhandofghezenofficial follow
To the citizen who spread a highly damaging rumor that we were hosting a petting zoo inside the church, please come to talk to us. You are not in danger, but words will be exchanged. Lots of trouble was caused due to careless behavior.
⚖️ ketterdamfails follow
Womp womp
9,789 notes
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🎀 justapigeon follow
Hey guys. Sorry I haven't been able to update my Pekka Rollins x Jan van eck fanfic. I've been searching for my mom for almost a week since she ran away after hearing that you had to get a vaccine for Firepox after the last outbreak. (She believes in praying to the saints.)
248 notes
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🍪 eatthemerchs follow
I hate all of you. Why is this website making Kaz Brekker a soft boy when he literally MURDERS PEOPLE. No, he won't cry if you hug him. No he doesn't want to pet your dog. He'll take your eye out.
Stop romanticizing crime, all of you are sick.
(I am TIRED of the dog memes. Brekker is a crime boss. Why would any of you think he'd even care about your dog.)
🐾 magic-tricks follow
Your border collie is nice. But your chihuahua barks too much.
15,370 notes
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🦂 northerstaverner follow
literally just saw some tall ass guy with a huge gun, a revolver and the brightest outfit l've ever seen, trot past my window??? In broad daylight??? Like oh my god. It felt like looking at a stork who made a wish he was human. His clothes were purple and green. Who wears that. Like, iconic. But still.
🐰 jeepsteristhebestshot follow
But was he handsome
🦂 northerstaverner follow
He was built like a stork.
🐰 jeepsteristhebestshot follow
But was he handsome???
🦂 northerstaverner follow
I'm not answering that... who is this.
🧁sugarandredribbons follow
Op answer
☁️ theweststavesucksass follow
Op we all want to know
🫵 isthisbarrelbossproblematic follow
OP THIS IS AN URGENT MATTER
🫀dmitrithekerchman follow
OPPPPP
4,750 notes
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sedgewick-gayble · 5 months
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roaring twenties tumblr simulator pt. 2
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🎙 fancy-nancyboy Follow
men be like "i would never succumb to homosexuality" and then hold a mans face tenderly as he lights his cigarette with his own. okayy pansy we see you
( 655 notes )
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💄 thewhoringtwenties Follow
art deco more like art dicko! aaaand post
( 27 notes )
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🎥 claras-bowtie Follow
attended a petting party last saturday and there were no animals not even at all :(
#WHY WOULD THEY CALL IT THAT
( 12 notes )
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🕯 tuberculosiswarrior Follow
i lov my mother and father so nuch forever i cannot wait to attend my new job at the dubious factory where there have never been any machinery incidents evr before
( 73 notes )
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🎩 Rate-my-setup Follow
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Submitted by anonymous.
( 3,887 notes )
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thebeesknees Follow reblogged 🔁 jazzcat Follow
🎺 jazzcat Follow
The cocaine in coca-cola just doesnt hit the same anymore....
📰 itsallcopacetic Follow
OP they took out the cocaine
🎺 jazzcat Follow
WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY TOOK OUT THE COCAINE
🕰 thebeesknees Follow
tumblr heritage post
( 13,985 notes )
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🚬 runrummer Follow
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Hes so puppycoded
( 8 notes )
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moonshiningitup Follow reblogged 🔁 moonshiningitup Follow
🥃 moonshiningitup Follow
The eroticism of the machinery incidents at the dubious factory
🥃 moonshiningitup Follow
Easy website
( 12,109 notes )
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🥂 cake-eater Follow
There is a gang war in Chicago. The first gang to get to 100 kills, gets to take over that part of the city. You NEED to be careful, Babe Ruth. You could be at high risk because of your high status. PLEASE be safe, everyone in or around Chicago, and please reblog this to get it to the celebrities in Chicago
( 20,098 notes )
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takavasen · 1 month
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Tumblr dashboard in Night Vale simulator
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🧪homo-genius
Today's science fact:
Spiders have an open blood circulation system, which means they do not have veins and their blood is different from the blood of mammals. Unfortunately many healthcare professionals do not know this, which can lead to improper methods in...
Read more
🎙️voice_of_night_vale
Spiders are a valuable part of our community and deserve good healthcare.
But more importantly, I want everyone to know that Carlos the Scientist made this post, he is my husband and I love him very much! 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜
🪬a-thousand-fingernails Follow
Cecil everyone knows you and Carlos are married and most of us are happy for you but you don't need to tell this in every post you make
🎙️voice_of_night_vale
Wait have I mentioned it before?
809 notes
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⭐sheriffofallarts
Hah saw some loser (@ marble-eyes) bring the same girl (@ mountainbeliever343 I think, couldn't see her face clearly from the cameras) home for the third time this week lol
cmon just say you are girlfriends already dont be shy
💎marble-eyes Follow
Hey you can't just share private information like that!! And besides that is not true, I haven't brought anyone home for a long time, I don't have time for that anymore!!!
🟡secretly-in-your-home
No. I can confirm that what Sam said is true. I was there. I am always there. Also, I put the rest of your cereal to your washing machine. They have been in the cupboard for a while now, I thought they were getting quite dusty and needed cleaning.
31 notes
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🏀basketballpalmer Follow
We had an another great season with @nvwheelchairbasketball team again! Thank you everyone, it's an honor to be the captain of the team! See you guys next season <3
👍wallabyyy Follow
Aaaaa congratulations! I miss you guyssss
43 notes
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☀️prophet-of-smiling-god
I just had the most delightful date with the most gorgeous theologist in Desert Bluffs Too!!! We had a lovely dinner at my house (some eyeball salad, mushed tarantulas and fried human fingers), watched some movies and of course made sure to serve our great Smiling God by making each other as happy as possible!! Unfortunately Charles said that it would make him unhappy if I shared the details, but I can confidently say that I have never been more joyful!!
🦷smiling-mayor Follow
Kevin, you missed a service in the Temple of Joy because of this. Surely you would remember doing that for an old friend, wouldn't you? 😊
☀️prophet-of-smiling-god
Oh, Lauren, of course I wouldn't ignore anything like that on purpose, you know how much I love tolerating you!!
98 notes
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🪽not-an-angel Follow
Does anyone happen to have 10 bucks?
You can send them here: absolutely-not-a-scam-link
🌟erikaaaaaaa Follow
Does anyone happen to have 10 bucks?
You can send them here: absolutely-not-a-scam-link
💵ex-vanston Follow
Does anyone happen to have 10 bucks?
You can send them here: absolutely-not-a-scam-link
💡erika-the-black-one Follow
Does anyone happen to have 10 bucks?
You can send them here: absolutely-not-a-scam-link
3 notes
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😎violentfootstool-deactivated20230416
Hey guys, so I just spoke to the new scientist lady and found out I don't actually have three pairs of arms. The lower two were just robot limbs that I tried out when I was seven years old and forgot to take them off. So hows your day ://
🔬janet-lubelle
I am always happy to help with explaining your problems away.
🎀tinfoilforteeth
Hey bitch how is it going under the cow
754 notes
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🎙️voice-of-night-vale
Alright, I'm going to say it. Steve Carlsberg does NOT know how to be a basketball coach. He knows nothing about any game structures, and he only allows one ball per game!! He talks too loud, except when you can't hear him. It will be ALL HIS FAULT if we end up losing this season!!!!!
🌠lines-in-the-sky Follow
:(
🎙️voice-of-night-vale
For everyone who finds this post now: I made this many years ago. Things have changed a lot. I'm very sorry, Steve. I couldn't hope for a better brother-in-law. You are my best friend, and I was the irrational one in this situation.
I have changed the way I look at people. I will not treat them the same way I used to treat Steve anymore.
1,642 notes
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🎙️voice-of-night-vale
Alright, who let Susan Willman be in charge of anything? She is the absolute worst at making desicions, like, who asks an obelisk its NAME? She had an oppoturnity to ask almost anything, and that's what she chose?? She better stay away from our way for at least seven decades, and keep her "Huntokar"-nonsense with herself!!!
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crazydrawsblog · 2 months
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Slugcat Tumblr Dashboard Simulator
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🌧️ raining-on-you Follow
I’m so done with this rain. Let me walk in peace!
🌪️ nomadic-rodent Follow
🤨 You say that but look at your username????
🌧️ raining-on-you Follow
It’s a joke, slugcats these days, istg.
🐌 eternallysleepy Follow
Can you two shut up I’m trying to sleep
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🦪 pearl-collector Follow
Hmmmm…porls….
🌪️ nomadic-rodent Follow
Tf are you, a damn scav?
🦪 pearl-collector Follow
Watch your back next cycle
🐾 outlaw Follow
Nomad has been real quiet since you said this 💀
🦪 pearl-collector Follow
:)
🦎 lizardslayer Follow
😨 wtf
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⨂ karmaguy Follow
Feeling cute...might ascend idk
🦎lizardslayer Follow
You better not be ascending when I get there
⨂ karmaguy Follow
Hmmm...void fluid....
🦎lizardslayer Follow
Do NOT
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249 notes · View notes
Text
the jurist system seems really cool i hope they keep using it :-)
27 notes
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🌈 lawsbian Follow
hey girl. am i a suspect. because you can "court" me any time
🧊 just--ice Follow
try.
🌈 lawsbian Follow
hey girl. am i a suspect. because you can "try" me any time
🌈 lawsbian Follow
hey girl. are you a lawyer. because you can "try" to "court" me any time
🌈 lawsbian Follow
hey girl. am i on trial.
🌈 lawsbian Follow
i'm determined to make this work btw
🌈 lawsbian Follow
hey girl. law
🔪 violencekilling Follow
hey girl. are you a murderer. because ow ough ouch agh stop stabbing me
732,390 notes
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🌟 rockliker270 Follow
guys watch out hes gonna shelly de kill you
293,485 notes
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🎀 copiicat Follow
they called me to the witness stand and the defense attorney just shouted "BOOOOOO WE HATE YOUR PUSSY"
43,618 notes
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🧇 edible-evidence Follow
look if i was on trial and the guy prosecuting me started advertising his music i'd just plead guilty. avoid the embarrassment of getting put in prison by a guy who basically used the trial to say "this blew up btw here's my soundcloud"
97,384 notes
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⚖️ courtofpublicopinions Follow
💞 lawveyourself Follow
didnt miles edgeworth defend someone in a case once
⛲ fountainoftruth Follow
do you know the difference between a prosecutor and a defense attorney
270,934 notes
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💟 longingforyou Follow
being rivals isn't enough i need to kiss you
💟 longingforyou Follow
who the fuck is evil magistrate
💟 longingforyou Follow
STOP TAGGING THIS WITH LAWYERS?????
584,769 notes
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🐈 nyattorney Follow
they hired a guy to stand in court and shout "GET A ROOM YOU TWO" whenever the lawyers start getting a little too homoerotic
976 notes
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💥 courtroomchaos Follow
your honor i know all the evidence points to my client being guilty. but come on you have to admit he kinda ate right
💼 courtofwaw Follow
mia fey when they had phoenix wright on trial
20,475 notes
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🔍 thuthseeker Follow
ok hot take but i feel like these lawyers should maybe not be allowed to drag literal children to court with them?? how many people have gotten genuinely actually fucking SHOT in court and they're just ok bringing fucking 8 year olds in?
12,475 notes
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💼 courtofwaw Follow
happy almost christmas to all who celebrate
💫 dizzydreamers124 Follow
it's march
🎄 holidazed Follow
happy almost christmas :)
😈 knownjaywalker Follow
WHO is putting this on my dash
👁️ cymorgue Follow
STOP POSTING THIS. IT IS JUNE.
🐼 pandastar91 Follow
ITS ALMOST CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!
1,589,589 notes
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💽 platinumcourtrecord Follow
evil gavinners be like. innocent hate. this is a nothing post
19,384 notes
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🥚 eggvidenced Follow
STOP asking me about the dl-6 post idc idc look even phoenix wright forged evidence once shut up
📕 lexculpatory Follow
he didn't forge the evidence, though. it was kristoph gavin who ordered the forgery. this was covered in the trial of vera misham. if you're going to try to compare yourself to well known figures, you could at least check the veracity of your claims.
🥚 eggvidenced Follow
yeah well. he might have. on a different case or something.
73 notes
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🃏 thecourtjester Follow
i tried to take the bar exam but they didnt let me because i wasnt cunty and traumatized enough
57,384 notes
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😇 innosense Follow
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683,876 notes
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🦀 mad_libz_87 Follow
when will global studios realize that i do not WANT another shitty steel samurai spinoff i just want the original show back
7,094 notes
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⚖️ courtofpublicopinions Follow
she present on my evidence til i reach a verdict
⚖️ courtofpublicopinions Follow
WRONG BLOLG. DON'T REBLOG THIS. DELETE POST DELETE POST DELETE POST I SWEAR WE'RE PROFESSIONALS HERE
17,283 notes
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👑 courtroyals Follow
"we need more great prosecutors" you guys couldn't even handle manfred von karma
🧊 just--ice Follow
didn't he kill someone?
👑 courtroyals Follow
irrelevant. you guys couldn't handle him.
587 notes
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📋 lawandwhoreder Follow
law: i'm so law
lawyer, who needs to one up everyone no matter what: i'm more law than you
🏛️ lawyest Follow
hi
📋 lawandwhoreder Follow
you've got to be fucking kidding me
183,834 notes
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🧊 just--ice Follow
why is it always murders with lawblr. why don't we ever talk about divorce or something
1K notes · View notes
analog-kidd · 3 months
Text
If Fire Emblem Had Tumblr Part 2
(part 1)
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🪙annablr-staff ☑️
Introducing New Features!
Keep reading
🔪v-a-n-t-a-g-e Follow
WTF ARE THESE NEW FEATURES????
ARE YOU TRYING TO SCAM US????
😈fallenwyvern Follow
this is annablr ofc theyre gonna try and scam us
#smh new users bitching abt annablr are so annoying #yeah no shit its a scam
(946,199 notes)
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💜mlm-sewer-assassin Follow
Gods why are the men from Tellius so hot!?!
Like look
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ugggggggggghhhhhhhlsslcdk;nakc king cainegusdisisudapdaso sooo hottttt 🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤
🦁the-real-king-of-beasts☑️ Follow
I'll take that as a complement haha
💜mlm-sewer-assassin Follow
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(110,119 notes)
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🐴cantocantocantocanter Follow
*Edit* I know on other continents archers can promote to other things but I was thinking about Ylisse, Elyos, and Magvel when making this poll
💘no-i-wont-shut-up Follow
in valentia and fodlan snipers promote into bow knights 😎
🏰armored-general Follow
CAN MOUNTED UNITS SHUT UP ABOUT BEING "THE BEST CLASS"!!!!
NO YOUR NOT!!!!
🪶lighterthanafeather Follow
Youre just jealous that we have a bigger movement range
🏰armored-general Follow
NO IM NOT!
and whats that mov gonna do when you get one rounded by a lvl 6 fighter cause your winged donkey falls apart by a light breeze
🪶lighterthanafeather Follow
Sorry! Can't hear you with that 4 mov!
#armors stop being slow challenge (impossible)
(1,109 notes)
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🔫tastemyfeglock Follow
Ugh,, can breidablik STOp summoning fredrick???
I already summoned like 7 of him today!!!
🪨pickagodandprey Follow
what??????? who's breidablik??? why am I being summoned??? I am right here next to my lord in his castle, I'm confused???????
🔫tastemyfeglock Follow
GO AWAY!!! YOURE USELESS!!!!!!!!!!!!
🪨pickagodandprey Follow
Excuse me?? I don't even know you!
🪚sidecharater121 Follow
Hey look! A Fredrick that hasn't been summoned yet
(553 notes)
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⚜️youngknightnight Follow
Sorry guys for being inactive for so long,,
I was having family issues,,
basically I'm a sword knight about to promote and I wanna be able to use bow upon promotion but my fucking parents keep insisting on axes but I don't wanna use axes!
They keep saying that "axes are sooooo much better than bows" "we encounter so many lance users, why don't you want that advantage?" or "bows only works at two range, why do you want to be defenseless at one range?" bro stfu let me live! I just wanna use bows OKAY?!
Sorry everyone its just been a lot.
#elitists dni #or I will cut you
(39 notes)
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🌠thracianstar Follow
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found this weird looking lance an enemy dropped while on my trip in Fodlan.
Gonna try an use it in the next battle!
🎏h-o-l-l-o-w-v-e-s-s-a-l Follow
uhhhh op? I don't recommend using that lance unless you have a crest but your post implies you're not from Fodlan soo uh
don't fucking use it if you wanna live
🐟fishphish Follow
op? op are you there? OP??
🦴️armorcrusher Follow
OP?!?!? OP!!!!!!!!!????? ANSWER US OP!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(437 notes)
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🥩singingnmeat Follow
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this is the best thing in the world on divine dragon
❤️️crimsonrider Follow
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#this is something my wyvern would say if he could talk #anyways #back to hating on my brother
(391 notes)
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💚blueplusyellowunit Follow
I found this blueish-white wyvern near Crimea but it wouldn't let me ride it!
It started to thrash around, I had to stop when it started breathing fire
ik you just can't tame a wild wyvern without a lot of time, but the wyvern looked so pretty😭😭😭😭
💭dragon-ggilf Follow
WAIT WAS THAT YOU WHO TRIED TO RIDE ME?!?!?
YOU ALMOST RIPPED OUT ONE OF MY HORNS WHILE TRYING MOUNT ME!!!!
ASSHOLE!!!!
💚blueplusyellowunit Follow
OH SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOURE NOT A WYVERN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
imsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorry
(2,330 notes)
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😉sranks Follow
I tried to use his lance but my rank was D
😉sranks Follow
easy website
(24,998 notes)
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🏋️‍♂️chop-official Follow
gonna use the devil axe,
wish me luck!
🏋️‍♂️chop-official Follow
I'm liking my odds!!
🏋️‍♂️chop-official Follow
cleic
(492 notes)
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👺foxythings Follow
Swords are the worst weapon type in my kitsune opinion
🗡theawesomemerc Follow
kys
#you dont even use weapons wtf #how tf should you know
(97 notes)
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271 notes · View notes