#their body language seems so natural yet expressive I love it

[canisalbus]

.

#aaaa dangit ;v; #first of all it's honestly unfathomable you managed to draw this on your phone how on earth #you must have some intense fine motor skills to achieve this kind of precision on such a small screen #zero judging necessary #their body language seems so natural yet expressive I love it #the way Vasco is leaning over the counter like he owns the place (he doesn't but certainly does his best to give that impression) #his expression is terribly endearing as well #to me he seems a tiny bit hesitant which is a fun contrast to his confident pose #and Machete sipping his coffee with such finesse #you made him look so refined #but he's just called white boy now #really makes you think of the awkward and drawn-out trying-to-break-the-ice phase that probably preceded this #this is so sweet and you depicted them so well! thank you! #gift art #nejd08 #own characters #Vasco #Machete #modern au #I wonder if Vasco is a genuine caffeine wizard #or is he just average at best or even lowkey awful and Machete keeps going there anyway because the barista is cute and nice to him

[viviennevermillion]

love languages

✧ ɴᴏᴛᴇꜱ: hsr debut post, hope this does well. i'm only at chapter 2 part 1 so pls bare we me. (gn!reader), aeons can walk among mortals for this

✧ ɴᴏᴡ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ: bloom in the dark — emorie

✧ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ: blade, dan heng, jing yuan, luocha, march 7th, nanook, yaoshi

✧ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: some angst & hint at character death in blade's because i'm still figuring out how to write anything but angst for a character whose main objective is that he wants to die, i had way too much fun making the aeons eldritch

✧ giving: gifts

As much as Blade loved you, as much as he treasured the memories he shared with you and as much as he'd hate to cause you pain or grief; you were all too familiar with his predicament. You had been ever since you agreed to stay by his side, to love him for as long as you had together. That was the price you'd pay for loving a man who considered himself dead in spirits already. A shell of who he once was.

Part of him felt guilty for indulging you; how could he call himself yours when he'd take the exit from his cursed immortality if it presented itself before him tomorrow? How could he promise you his heart if he couldn't promise you a future?

He knew there was a chance he might outlive you by centuries. He knew there was a chance he'd say goodbye to you in a month. Still, you were willing to be with him, through all the uncertainty.

So he gifts you things to remember him by, should he part from you too soon for your liking. Some of them were expensive; after all he had more than enough life behind him to no longer be bound by material limits. Some of them were simple trinkets or flowers he preserved using glycerine. All of them held meaning but the overarching message was: "We were born in different times. If it were for the natural order of things, we never would have even met. I've been suffering since long before I met you. And yet, curiously, despite all; I treasure every moment I had with you. I'm glad to have loved you."

✧ receiving: physical touch

One thing Blade would have never expected when he met you; but was more than glad to realize, was that you could make him forget his anger and pain, even if it was for just a while; even if it always inevitably returned.

He loved falling asleep in your arms. It was the closest thing to the peace and salvation he craved that he could currently have. For just a few hours, he was content. He had forgotten what that felt like.

He loved the feeling of your fingers carding through his long, dark hair. And you loved the smile you so rarely saw on his face when you did this. Blade's breathing would calm and he'd nuzzle your neck as he was being held in your arms.

Blade also loves waking up in the middle of the night, feeling you shift in bed beside him and pressing a few lazy kisses to his lips before he fell back asleep.

He loves the way you tend to his scars, how you seem to wash the pain off his body with your caring touch; despite feeling guilty for how he has made you worry again. You'd end up disinfecting and bandaging his wounds and sometimes he had to chuckle at how you treated him as if he was fragile, despite having likely seen more hardships than you could ever imagine.

✧ giving: acts of service

Dan Heng doesn't really know how to express his love for you at first so he defaults to helping you out however he can.

He helps you with little jobs around the Astral Express and loves to team up with you for any missions or chores that fall on both of your plates.

Especially with all the knowledge he gathered from the archives and basically living in there; he's more than ready to help you figure out any mysteries you encounter on your journey with the Astral Express.

If he needs to explain anything to you or answer a question you have about stuff like the Aeons or any factions you encountered, he'll often pull you onto his lap at the desk and show you important info about it in a book or online. "I hope I could answer your questions. Did this help you?", he then asks you, looking into your eyes. "Yup!", you shoot him a smile and give him a quick kiss to the lips which leaves him blushing and just staring at you for a while.

"Hey, Astral Express to Dan Heng, you still there?", you chuckle and wave your hand in front of his eyes. He just blinks like, twice and then picks you up bridal style: "Come on, let's figure out that task Himeko gave you." He's just trying to distract from the fact that you flustered him.

Sometimes he tries to cook for you. The emphasis is on tries. You'll walk into the train kitchen and he'll be there stirring something in the frying pan and glancing at a recipe. "What are you doing there, love?", you ask and kiss his cheek. "I'm making lunch for you", he states and you hug him. "Aww, that's so sweet of you!", you press a few appreciative kisses to his lips, "wait why does it smell burnt?" "What-"

✧ receiving: quality time

Dan Heng is what we call 'a good listener'. He's not the best conversationalist but he likes to hear you talk and he remembers stuff you told him that even you have forgotten about until he one day just brings it up out of nowhere.

He loves to spend the time between trailblazing expeditions just hanging out with you. You check your phone and receive a text from him like "Hey, want to come over to my room? 🫀"

"?" "March told me that I should add a heart to my messages to make you feel more loved. Did I not do it correctly?" "Dan Heng, sweetie, no..."

You enter his room and he has made you two cups of coffee, the only thing he's actually good at "cooking". The two of you have decided to watch a movie and lay down on Dan Heng's mattress. "I can feel the bones in my back snapping in half, how do you sleep on this?", you raise your eyebrow. "I don't think it's that bad", he mumbles, seeming lost in thought.

While watching the movie, he has his arms wrapped around you. His only opinion about it is "it was good".

Also enjoys playing board games with you, specifically card games. You're pretty equally matched so there's no telling who wins this round. When he wins, you ask him what he wants as a reward and he just gives you a soft smile and tells you a kiss will do.

✧ giving: physical touch

Jing Yuan is a fairly affectionate man behind closed doors. He doesn't leave for work without giving you as many goodbye kisses as you want and doesn't let go of you throughout the whole night while he sleeps. You could get up and grab a glass of water from the kitchen, as soon as you return, Jing Yuan wraps his arms around you once more; even when he's in deep sleep.

He enjoys just sitting idly with you, both of you doing your own things and he's just holding your hand or has a hand resting on your thigh. He also loves when you lean your head on his shoulder and as soon as he feels you do that, he turns his head to place a kiss on your forehead.

Sometimes you'll be reading a book while sitting between his legs and he ends up pressing multiple kisses to your cheek or trailing them down your neck. He smiles against your skin everytime he does this. He's not always seeking to touch you but he has his clingy 10 minutes where he wants attention and sometimes that happens to interfere with whatever it is you're doing at the current moment.

Most of the time you can't resist indulging him and just kissing him for a while, burying your hands in his hair or cupping his cheeks gently.

✧ receiving: quality time

Jing Yuan loves those days on the Xianzhou Luofu that are so peaceful that he gets to spend the entire day with you. You decide to take a nap during noon, falling asleep in his arms, listening to his steady heartbeat. You feel Jing Yuan press a few soft kisses to your forehead while you're dozing off.

When you awake, he's no longer next to you. You get up and find him in the kitchen, preparing a late lunch for the two of you. You wrap your arms around his waist from behind and glance at the frying pan to see him fry some eggs.

You hear a chirping sound and fish a small finch out of your boyfriend's hair. "Don't worry you, we're not grilling your brethren", you whisper softly and put the bird on the windowsill, "fly free, my little friend." The bird lifts off. You raise an eyebrow at Jing Yuan. "Was this the last one?"

He chuckles. "Should be." This at least gives him an excuse to take a bath with you and maybe you'll volunteer to wash his hair. He loves the feeling of your fingers brushing through his hair and just relaxing and letting you pamper him. "You know, if that's what you want, you can just ask right?", you remind him, "you don't need to call your woodland friends for help." Jing Yuan just laughs and gently guides your chin closer to his face so he can kiss you softly.

He enjoys playing chess against you, though you tend to suggest to play a die-based game instead so you can win by having good luck, because Jing Yuan has several centuries of chess practice under his belt. "You know that still doesn't mean you'll win", he watches you unpack the Ludo game with an amused expression. "I have good luck, I got you after all", you say confidently. "Well I've heard an old saying from a distant planet that when you luck out in love it means you have bad luck when it comes to games", he argues and crosses his arms with a smile on his face. You roll your eyes and he responds by kissing your lips.

Sometimes he watches you play chess against Yanqing. "Does it hurt to lose to an 8 year old?", he teases you. "Silence, Jing Yuan, you taught him this stuff." Your lover lets out a laugh. "And yet he still has so much to learn before he can beat me."

✧ giving: words of affirmation

When Luocha loves you, he doesn't hesitate to tell you. After all, his companion in the coffin consistently reminds him that life is short and he better have no regrets, should misfortune strike him tomorrow. Luocha adores you and in his mind, there's nothing stopping him from letting you know.

He's also a bit of a smooth-talker to you and you only. He never gets overbearing with his flirting, but you can expect a few cheesy compliments followed by a kiss to your hand. He'll pick you up for your date, takes your hand in his and leads it to his lips. "You're as beautiful today as the first time I saw you", he smiles and whispers against your skin.

Getting together with Luocha could take ages if you insist in knowing why he's being so suspicious first; but once you do he's ironically an open book for you. He has shared his greatest secret with you and you've given your hearts to one another, so why should he hold back now from telling you what's on his mind?

Sometimes his words are on the nose, such as cupping your cheeks and telling you that he loves you with all his heart or that he wants you to traverse the stars with him from now on. Sometimes the love he has for you is put into telling you how he remembers certain areas around the Xianzhou Luofu as "that place where you surprised me with a bouquet of flowers when we met up for tea" or "that shop where you almost made the coffin fall over". You learn with time that there are a lot of things he associates with you and your memories together.

✧ receiving: physical touch

Luocha loves your affections. He's the least grumpy man ever in the morning. You could wake him up at 3am for kisses and he'd be down for it. He loves when he wakes up and the first thing he feels is your lips on his cheeks or your fingers running through his long blond hair or your fingertips drawing circles on his bare shoulders.

He pulls you into his chest and you can hear his heartbeat while he holds you close. He lifts your chin up and his lips meet yours before he even opens his eyes. He kisses you softly, his tongue circling around yours as he tries to pull you even closer. "Good morning, my love", his voice sounds raspy before he presses a kiss to your cheek.

Luocha loves to take a walk through the city and hold your hand in his while doing so. He doesn't say it but he definitely melts if you stop your walk for a minute just to give him a hug or kiss him gently.

One time you get caught in the rain and Luocha finds shelter for the two of you under a secluded pavillion. You are cold so he wraps his jacket around you and holds you in his arms until the skies clear. He presses a kiss to the top of your head. "Are you still cold, my dear?", his voice sounds so soft and he gently squeezes your shoulder. You shake your head. He lets out a chuckle. "That's good, then", he replies before resting his head on top of yours and closing his eyes for a while.

He enjoys resting his head in your lap while you run your fingers through his hair. You might be busy with something else, not noticing how he smiles up at you like you're the most beautiful thing he's ever seen (you are). He eventually closes his eyes and rests his cheek against your stomach.

✧ giving: words of affirmation

March 7th talks quite a lot, especially if you were to ask Dan Heng about it. So if she's in love with you; her feelings are bound to slip out with her words. It wasn't hard for you to become aware of her crush on you because she just accidentally blurted it out one day. She was so happy when you told her you felt the same; even if this conversation was the furthest thing from planned.

March loves to explore the civilizations you travel to on the Astral Express and buying lots of souvenirs and clothes from there. So sometimes she'll drag you from shop to shop and often finds things she thinks would look good on you. No matter if you're wearing a fancy suit / dress or a 5 credit neon green "I survived the Belabogeyman attack" shirt from a shady souvenir shop, she hypes you up like you're on the front cover of a popular magazin.

"Aw look, you're so cute", she squeals and hugs you from the side, trying and failing to lift you up. There's at least 5 people in the shop staring at you and the shopkeeper glares at March, silently reminding her to keep her voice at an acceptable volume for a public building. "Oops... sorry", she cringes slightly and then turns to you again with a bright smile, "you should totally get this!"

Everytime you enter her room after a trip you find a new photo you took together on her wall. "Look at your smile on this one", she holds one of them up, "it makes me happy whenever I look at it."

Dan Heng told her to stop talking about you all the time so now she talks with you about you.

Definitely tells you she loves you plenty of times.

✧ receiving: gifts

March loves gifts. She's the kind of person who can't wait to open her birthday presents so you guys have to hide them from her every year; preferably somewhere where she can't reach or won't find them.

So when she receives gifts from you for no special occasion, she's gushing so much.

She loves flowers and chocolates. She definitely has a sweet tooth but will still share the chocolates with you. She is very interested in the meaning of the flowers you gift to her so if you can tell her about that, she'll be all the more happy. She loves romantic gestures like this. She has mostly read about them in romance novels and she's more than thrilled to finally receive them herself.

March also adores jewelry, whether you bought something for her or crafted it yourself. She'll wear it everyday and she's very proud whenever someone asks about it.

She posts about the gifts she receives in her status online as well. She'll be like "y/n got me this! 💓💓💓"

She dm's the pictures to Dan Heng as well and he leaves her on read.

When you gift her something, she gives you a hug and a kiss on the cheek before opening it. Once she opened it, she smiles at you brightly and kisses you on the lips. "Thank you so much for this!", she takes your hand into hers and squeezes it.

Receiving gifts from you makes her so happy. But being loved by you makes you feel like every day is her birthday either way. And for you, every day was March 7th.

✧ giving: quality time

Loving an Aeon wasn't the easiest endeavor. Especially not Nanook. But somehow you had touched the destructive god's heart and for the first time since they became what they were today, there was a life they wanted to treasure and protect.

They don't understand much about the human world as it was today, having mostly spent their time on a different plane of existence. It was only when they connected with you and took an interest in you; that they decided to walk among them for a while, to be able to spend time with you. At first their bitterness became apparent every day they spent with you, only scoffing at the people they saw going about their daily life and the things that they had built; which all would be wiped away by destruction if Nanook were to have their way.

But you took that as a challenge. You wanted to see if you could find something they liked about life, unaware that you had become that very phenomenon.

You made it your favorite pastime to show them all sorts of things from the material world and see their reaction to them. "What do you think of this painting?", you ask them, holding up a work of art you got from a market. "I'm not too fond of the sound it makes and the cosmic essence it depicts", they respond with a deadpan expression and you just look at them in confusion, "right, I forgot you can only perceive three dimensions."

Nanook, despite not letting it show, enjoys spending time with you; even though it could be challenging sometimes considering they were an Aeon and you were not. Sometimes they would ask you about things you couldn't see and other times they struggled to discern what things they saw you could pass through and which ones you considered "a wall".

✧ receiving: physical touch

Nanook loves your touch, much as they would like you to never notice that. They're not used to any physical sensations so they're very sensitive. They're unable to form coherent sentences when you so much as press a kiss to their lips. According to them it was very difficult to convey their thoughts in your way of speech when you were "trying to overwhelm them like this"

Giving Nanook affection also proved to be a challenge in more ways than one. The first time you tried to rest your head on their chest, your cheek touched the golden essence flowing out of them and you could perceive what you could only describe as the worst sensory overload anyone has ever experienced; a colorful mix of incoherent screaming and the faint sound of explosions; the feeling of all-encompassing despair and grief.

"What was THAT?", you stared at Nanook in shock, panting. "The entirety of traces left behind by destroyed worlds and ending lives from at least the last couple millenia", they answered very casually. You sighed and held your head, now suffering from a migraine. "At least it doesn't disintegrate me", you took a deep breath and started rummaging through your closet. "Only if I want it to", Nanook explained. "Charming", you whisper to yourself in a sarcastic way and toss them a shirt, "put this on."

Kisses are such a novelty to them. They're like "what was that?"

"Affection." "Do it again."

One time you pressed several kisses to their shoulder and Nanook just slow-blinked at you for like 5 minutes, before resting their head on your shoulder.

✧ giving: gifts

Yaoshi loves to bestow "blessings" upon you. Though, you have to teach them at first what you would consider an acceptable present.

The first one is immortality if you want it. Yaoshi would love nothing more than for you to be by their side forever.

Their next attempts at gift-giving left you feeling a little lost. They manifest before you, excitedly grabbing your cheeks and your waist and your shoulders with their hands and pulling you into a kiss. "My dearest, I made you a creature", they exclaim and reveal a Frankenstein-esque abomination the size of a volleyball. You can't quite discern what it actually is but it looks like an abstract mixture of a hamster, frog and a dragon. "Uh...thank you?", you try to be as polite as possible, unsure what to do with the creature as it spits a smaller version of itself onto your bedroom floor and then disintegrates. "It reincarnates out of itself", Yaoshi explains. "I can see that", you nod with wide eyes, patting Yaoshi's head.

One day, Yaoshi guides your spaceship to a distant location. "This is a planet I renovated for you", they join you as you land and explain their thoughts behind all the different new kinds of flowers they created specifically for you. "You're my greatest inspiration", they kiss your cheek and wrap their arms around you.

You eventually sit them down and calmly explain to them that one planet is more than enough and that you definitely do not need another creature. You teach them about your customs of giving gifts and they listen attentively. Maybe a bouquet of flowers would do next time.

✧ receiving: quality time

Yaoshi wants you to stay by their side forever. They perceive the passage of time very differently from you, yet they treasure and vividly remember every second by your side. Your bond of love is a sacred one in their eyes and they want to feel as close as possible to you.

They especially love talking to you and learning about your experiences that are so vastly different from their own. Despite being so intertwined with life itself; Yaoshi learns so much about life just from being with you. They never would have imagined you could give them so many new perspectives on the universe just by sharing your thoughts and beliefs with them.

Yaoshi always listens to you attentively and you see a sense of childlike wonder in their eyes when you speak about the way you experience the world, the things you value and the memories you treasure.

"Isn't it marvelous; how we see the world through such different lenses and are entirely different entities, yet we love each other so deeply and unconditionally", their voice sounds soft as they pull you onto their lap, holding you with their six arms and planting kisses on the back of your neck repeatedly.

Unlike Nanook, Yaoshi is very clingy. Quality Time with you always involves touching you in some way, be it kissing you repeatedly or holding you tightly within their embrace. Sometimes they sing you to sleep with a gentle voice, running their fingertips over your shoulder.

#honkai star rail x reader #hsr x reader #jing yuan x reader #blade x reader #blade x you #jing yuan x you #dan heng x reader #dan heng #dan heng x you #jing yuan #luocha x reader #luocha #luocha x you #march 7th x reader #march 7th x you #nanook x reader #yaoshi x reader #yaoshi #nanook #honkai star rail #hsr #honkai star rail fluff #hsr fluff

[amiableness]

Tulips

Pairings: Sirius Black x Fem!Reader, Remus Lupin x Fem!Reader

Summary ✿ After finding out Remus Lupin has found himself a girlfriend, a devastated Y/n L/n asks Sirius Black to help her get over him. Except Sirius has feelings for her.

Warnings ✿ Language, unrequited love, angst, kissing, jealousy, reader wearing lipgloss and a dress, mentions of anxiety. If there's more let me know!

Word Count ✿ 20.3k

A/N 💌 This was my first ever series, but I've decided to repost it as a oneshot!

Your affection for Remus had begun almost from the moment you met him. For nearly five years, you found yourself quietly drawn to him. How could you not be? His tranquil and caring nature had eased your anxieties countless times. His unwavering loyalty to both his friends and his studies never ceased to amaze you. The bravery he exhibited each month, whether he acknowledged it or not, left you in awe. With Remus, you always felt secure, as if nothing could disturb your sense of safety.

Monday nights marked your routine study sessions with Remus, a tradition since the start of sixth year. Arriving promptly at his dorm, you were met with unsettling moans seeping from beneath the door, causing your stomach to plummet. Frozen in shock, you raced through possible explanations, with Sirius seeming the most plausible culprit. Surely, Remus wouldn't forget your study night, and the thought of another girl seemed inconceivable. As you turned around, anxiety coursing through your veins, you collided with Sirius, tears welling up in your eyes.

"Please tell me it’s James in there." You pleaded, the desperation clear in both your tone and your expression, causing Sirius' heart to sink. Knowing James was at practice, he couldn't bring himself to shatter your hope. Instead, he grasped your hand firmly and practically pulled you towards your dormitory. Despite the chaos of emotions, Sirius made sure to shield you with his own body, warding off any prying eyes curious about the tears streaming down your cheeks.

"Are any of your roommates here?" Sirius inquired as he halted in front of your dormitory door.

"No, Lily is staying the night at your dorm with James, and I think Marlene is staying with Dorcas." You responded, your voice tinged with sadness as you used your sleeve to dab at the tears staining your cheeks. Leading the way inside, you guided Sirius into your room, where he realized it was his first time seeing your personal space. Until now, you and Remus had been inseparable, leaving no room for Sirius to spend time alone with you.

He found himself a tad nervous, the proximity to you unnerving him in the best possible way. As he stood in your dormitory, the faint scent of your favorite perfume lingering in the air, Sirius couldn't help but feel a flutter in his stomach. It was an unfamiliar sensation, being so close to you without the familiar presence of Remus nearby.

"It wasn’t James and Lily in there, was it?" Sirius turned to you, his expression filled with concern as he observed you sitting on your bed, visibly holding back tears, awaiting his response.

"No, angel." He replied softly, his voice tinged with empathy as he moved to sit beside you. A sigh escaped his lips as he settled onto your bed. Sirius knew James's schedule all too well, and he was certain that James was still down at the Quidditch pitch, far from the dorm.

Everything about your side of the room was perfectly you. Your desk was adorned with stacks of books, polaroids capturing cherished memories with friends pinned to the wall, and one of Remus’ sweaters casually draped over the back of your chair. Yet, amidst the familiar sights, a small glass vase seized his attention. Within it, a single red tulip, a gift he had given you a few weeks earlier.

As he strolled around Black Lake with the boys, he stumbled upon the patch of flowers, and instantly, he knew it was meant for you. Knowing how much you adored flowers, often doodling them in the margins of your Potions notes while seated beside him, he couldn't resist picking it. James, catching sight of the flower, declared that Lily deserved an entire bouquet. 

You weren’t taken aback when James Potter interrupted your study session with Lily by presenting her with a stunning bouquet of flowers. However, what did catch you off guard was Sirius' gesture: placing a single red flower delicately on top of your open book and sending you a playful wink.

"​M’lady." He had murmured, and at that moment, your cheeks ignited with a warmth you had never felt before.

Lily filled the remainder of your study session with talk of how a red tulip symbolized a declaration of love while you simply laughed in response.

Sirius glanced over at you, noticing the tear-filled gaze fixed upon your hands as you sat on the bed. He hesitated, the weight of his words hanging in the air. "I didn’t know you had feelings for him." he finally admitted, his tone tinged with surprise.

You offered a soft laugh tinged with a hint of sadness. "I guess that means I’m good at hiding it then. It’s been a good couple of years now. Probably started the very first day I met him, honestly," you confessed, a bittersweet smile gracing your lips.

"I’m sorry, angel." Sirius expressed, his voice laced with genuine remorse.

A gentle shake of your head followed. "You don’t have to be sorry," you reassured him, your voice carrying a tone of acceptance intertwined with a hint of resignation.

"I could’ve given you a heads up," Sirius grimaced as your head whipped up to look over at him, the gravity of his words sinking in. "He’s been seeing this girl for weeks. He’s going to ask her out soon."

"Sirius-" you began, your voice carrying a mixture of surprise and concern.

"I’m telling you this not to be mean, but so you’re not blindsided when it happens." Sirius continued his tone earnest yet tinged with regret.

This time, you remained silent, your gaze drifting over to the polaroid displayed prominently on your bedside table. In the photo, you and Remus sat beneath a tree, his arm wrapped around you in a protective embrace while your head rested gently on his shoulder. The memory of that day flooded back — discussing a book, laughter filling the air, and Lily insisting on capturing the moment in a photograph. 

At the end of the day, with a knowing smile, she handed you the polaroid. The setting sun cast a beautiful glow upon the photo when you held it in your hand.

"C’mere," Sirius demanded softly, his voice a gentle command meant to pull you away from the intensity of the picture. He positioned himself against the headboard, arms open wide for you to find solace in. Without hesitation, you crawled into his embrace, nestling against his side. His arms enveloped you, offering comfort and warmth as he planted a tender kiss atop your head.

"What can I do?" Sirius inquired quietly, his gaze fixed on the tears tracing down your cheeks and staining his shirt.

"Help me get over him. Please." You pleaded, the vulnerability in your voice bared as you sought comfort and support from him.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

"Where the hell have you been? You nearly missed breakfast!" James exclaimed, his eyes scanning over your disheveled appearance—your hair in disarray and your clothes creased. It was a rare sight to see you, typically impeccably put together and five minutes ahead of everyone else, arriving late and looking rumpled. He chose not to mention the dark circles under your eyes or the absence of your usual cheery smile. He knew better than to bring that up.

Upon sensing Remus's scrutinizing gaze, you cleared your throat nervously and averted your eyes, unwilling to let him figure out that he was the cause of your disheveled appearance.

“Rough night.” That was simply put. In fact, last night had been incredibly rough, leaving you worse for wear this dreary morning. Cuddling with Sirius comforted you for so long before you were back to crying your heart out. He was kind enough to hold you the entire time, and eventually, you had both fallen asleep. There had been no discussion on what you meant last night about having him help you get over Remus. You didn’t know what you had meant by it either.

You grimaced as the memory flooded back, choosing to sit beside Sirius instead. He wouldn’t admit it in front of the boys, but he was well prepared to knock one of them over if they tried to sit next to him. After the trying night you'd endured, he made it a point to ensure you felt at ease and understood that he was there for you should you need anything. Normally, you occupied the seat next to Remus, with Sirius seated beside James and Peter. However, given the circumstances, he understood that you wouldn't feel comfortable sitting next to Remus that morning.

James' gaze darted between the two of you, noting the departure from your usual seating arrangement. He stole a quick glance at Remus, who seemed intent on studying you. "Hmm. Why is it that Sirius has been quiet all breakfast, and now you are too?" he quipped, breaking the silence.

"Sod off, mate." Sirius grumbled, pushing a steaming cup of tea toward you. Despite the gruff remark, he offered you a sweet smile before returning his attention to his meal. Even though the gesture was minimal, it made you want to burst into tears. The fact that he remembered your favorite tea and how you liked it meant more to you than words could express. Remus, however, frowned at the cup of tea sitting in front of you, his expression troubled.

“What? I can’t make conversation this beautiful morning?” James’s tone was still incredibly upbeat, unlike those around him. Peter hummed in agreement, his mouth full of cereal and unable to respond properly.

"It's storming." Remus mumbled, his gaze still fixed on you, sensing that something was amiss as you avoided meeting his eyes. Usually, you sat next to him, cheerily chatting about another book you had read together.

"Are you implying a storm isn't beautiful? Because I happen to think-"

"James, let's just have a quiet breakfast this Tuesday morning." Sirius interjected, surprising James with the interruption. James opened his mouth to protest, but the seriousness in Sirius's expression halted him mid-sentence. Sirius's deliberate interruption was aimed at signaling to Remus that he had missed your study night. It served its purpose, prompting Remus to acknowledge the missed study date.

"Oh, fuck. Y/n, I’m so sorry! Last night, our study night, I totally forgot," Remus blurted out, his words rushed and filled with regret as he watched your reaction. You simply shrugged and sipped your tea, avoiding direct eye contact with him. You kept your gaze fixed on your plate, knowing that meeting Remus's eyes would likely trigger another wave of tears.

"No big deal." You replied casually.

"Uh," Remus furrowed his eyebrows, his expression a mixture of concern and confusion as he searched your face for any sign of distress. However, your demeanor remained inscrutable, your face a mask of blankness. "Are you sure? I know you really wanted to study this week with your exam coming up-"

You finally met Remus's gaze, sitting up a bit straighter, "I was able to study, Remus, it's fine."

"You were? But uh-" Remus scrambled for words, uncertain how to navigate this tense exchange. He couldn't recall a time when you sounded so curt with him before.

"Sirius helped me." You interjected, your voice steady but tinged with an underlying tension.

James sputtered out a laugh, his gaze darting between you and Sirius. "He helped you study? Willingly?"

In reality, studying hadn't been the main agenda of the night. Before drifting off to sleep, you had hastily handed Sirius your flashcards from the nightstand, however, your pounding headache from crying rendered you unable to focus properly during his quizzing. So, technically, he did help you study, albeit minimally.

Peter raised his eyebrows, his tone laced with curiosity, "Is that where you were all last night? Studying?"

You squirmed uneasily at Peter's implication. Sirius shot James and Peter a sharp glance, silently urging them to stop talking.

Remus's lips parted in surprise as he shifted his gaze from Sirius to you. "He stayed the night with you?" His tone carried a hint of displeasure that didn't escape Sirius's notice. Despite himself, a slight sense of satisfaction flickered within Sirius at Remus's reaction.

Before anyone could respond, a pretty Ravenclaw leaned over Remus, enveloping him in a hug as she rested her head against his shoulder. "Rem, I thought you were going to try and sit with me this morning." She murmured.

Your body tensed at the sight of her; she was the girl from last night. A surge of jealousy, unlike anything you had ever experienced before, washed over you, catching you off guard. Your appetite vanished.

"Uh, sorry. I had to work on some things this morning and got a bit distracted." Remus's response came with a hint of discomfort, his apology tinged with unease. As you observed the exchange, you couldn't quite determine if his discomfort arose from her presence or the attention their interaction garnered. Quietly, you wished it leaned more towards the former.

Her lips formed a pretty pout, “Hm.”

James unabashedly observed the pair while taking a bite of his toast. "You know, Remus, if you ever need relationship advice, I’m here," he remarked, his tone teasing. Remus scowled in response, clearly unamused, while the girl giggled and tightened her grip around him, seemingly unfazed by James's comment.

You stole a glance at Sirius, momentarily tuning out the conversation to observe his reaction to the scene unfolding before you. Sensing the unease gnawing at your stomach, you instinctively reached for Sirius’ hand, which rested on his thigh. As soon as your fingers brushed against his, he responded by intertwining them with yours, his eyes meeting yours in silent understanding.

"Do you want to go?" he whispered softly, squeezing your hand in reassurance. Unable to trust your voice, you simply nodded in response. He released your hand momentarily, a fleeting disappointment washing over you until you watched as he effortlessly grabbed your bag and slung it over his shoulder. With a tender gesture, he reached for a muffin, noticing that you had hardly eaten.

Then, extending his hand towards you, he silently offered his support. Amidst James's lively conversation with the Ravenclaw girl and Remus's contemplative gaze, Peter looked on with a puzzled expression as Sirius extended his hand to you, a silent invitation to leave the discomfort behind.

"You don’t have to hold my bag." You mumbled, rising to your feet to face him, intertwining your fingers once more. Despite the awareness of the eyes fixed upon the two of you, your focus remained solely on Sirius.

"I wanted to, angel." Sirius replied softly, meeting your gaze with warmth. The genuine smile that graced your face was the first of the morning, and Sirius felt as if he had won the lottery.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

"Y/n." His voice sliced through the air, causing you to freeze mid-sentence. But deep down, what had you truly expected? That he wouldn’t approach you while you were quietly engrossed in your book in the common room? Your plan of avoiding him for as long as possible wasn’t unfolding as smoothly as you had hoped.

"Hi, Rem.” You responded softly, offering a genuine smile. Despite the ache that lingered from witnessing him with the Ravenclaw girl at breakfast, you couldn’t deny the bond you shared. After all, he was still your best friend. You couldn’t fault him for getting a girlfriend, no matter how much it hurt.

Remus settled into the armchair opposite you, his expression earnest. "I didn’t really get to talk to you much this morning," he began, his tone gentle.

You offered a nonchalant shrug, hoping to conceal the nervousness. "Oh. I mean, I wasn’t in much of a mood for chatting," you replied, attempting to maintain a façade of composure, though inwardly, you were anything but.

"Is everything alright? Is this about missing last night? I promise that I didn’t mean to, truly," Remus continued, his sincerity evident. Leaning forward, his eyes bore into yours, practically pleading for your forgiveness. Despite your resolve, his sincerity tugged at your heartstrings, and you found yourself wavering.

"I’m not upset about you missing our study night; I understand that things come up." You reassured him as though you were anything truly fine. There was a squeeze in your heart at remembering Remus with another girl, a stark reminder that she wasn't you.

Remus visibly relaxed at your words. "We could reschedule it?" he suggested, his tone hopeful.

A heavy silence settled between you. How were you supposed to tell him that you didn't want to reschedule? That you weren't ready to spend time alone with him right now? Being around him now, knowing you had no chance, felt like a punch to the gut.

"There you guys are!" James’ voice carried throughout the common room, effectively gaining more attention than he had probably intended. Sirius stood right beside him, his gaze already fixed on you. Peter was notably absent, likely engrossed in his studies elsewhere. Nevertheless, you welcomed the distraction.

James huffed as if he had been greatly inconvenienced. "We have been looking everywhere for you guys."

You couldn't help but laugh, "You didn’t think to check the common room first?"

"Y/n, please. Don’t be ridiculous." James quipped as he dropped into the armchair beside Remus. Remus's gaze lingered on you for a moment longer before he sighed and turned his attention to James. Soon enough, they were engrossed in their own conversation.

Sirius settled into the spot next to you, casually draping an arm over the back of the couch just behind your shoulders. As you leaned into his side and offered him a smile, he felt his cheeks flush with warmth. Your affectionate gestures toward him had always been present, but after last night, they seemed to intensify.

Your proximity never failed to make his heart skip a beat, and his stomach flutter. Despite his confidence in hiding his involuntary reactions to you, lately, it seemed more challenging for him to do so.

He greets you with the softest smile, his eyes reflecting warmth. "Hi, angel," he murmurs gently. Sirius had always affectionately called you angel, a term that secretly held a special place in your heart, one of your favorite things about him.

"Hi." You respond, a matching smile adorning your features, mirroring the comfort in his presence.

"I never got to thank you for last night." You admit, your tone filled with gratitude.

Shaking his head modestly, he insists, "You don’t have to thank me."

"It made me feel better having you there with me, so of course I want to thank you." You express earnestly, your appreciation evident in your words.

Sirius leans in, his breath tickling your ear as he whispers, "We still gotta talk about what you meant last night. By asking me to help you get over him."

Feeling a flush of embarrassment, you sputter out a response, "I’m not entirely sure what I meant. I figured you would know how to go about that."

"Why would I know how to go about that?" Sirius questions, genuine curiosity coloring his tone.

Shrugging, you admit, "I don’t know. I just thought you might have. You have way more experience with relationships than I do."

Sirius snorts, a wry grin tugging at the corner of his lips. "I wouldn’t call them relationships." he remarks, his mind briefly wandering through the array of flings he'd had in the past few years. None of them had left a lasting impression on him, none of them had made him feel the way you did.

You shrug, a hint of vulnerability in your expression. "It’s more experience than I have.”

Your voices remain hushed, a deliberate attempt to avoid drawing the attention of James and Remus. Yet, the intimate proximity between you and Sirius could easily spark curiosity on its own. You're practically nestled against his side, his warm breath brushing against your ear as he whispers. To any onlooker, it would seem as though you were lovers, exchanging sweet nothings in a quiet moment of intimacy.

He takes a moment to collect his thoughts, acutely aware of the gravity of his next question. He understands that the answer could severely hurt his feelings, "Are you in love with him?"

Your reaction is swift; you turn to him so abruptly that your noses nearly brush against each other. Sirius silently begs you to linger closer, but you withdraw just enough to maintain a respectable distance. He watches intently as you steal a glance at Remus, your bottom lip caught between your teeth in contemplation.

"No. But, honestly, it probably wouldn’t take much for me to fall in love with him." You confess, your words hanging in the air like a weight. Sirius needs a moment to recover, the impact of your admission hitting him harder than he had anticipated, despite mentally preparing himself for it.

You turn back to him, anguish evident in your voice, "How are you supposed to get over someone you’re nearly in love with?" Sirius hears the devastation in your tone, wishing he could convey that he genuinely comprehends that sentiment. However, delving into such explanations would only invite more questions, and that's the last thing he needs right now.

"I don’t know, angel." He responds simply, observing as you anxiously pick at your nails.

A quiet lull envelops you both before you speak up again, "I don’t think spending all my time with him helps. Maybe I should distance myself a little bit."

"You’re welcome to spend all that time with me instead." Sirius offers, wrapping his arm around your shoulders and pulling you closer to his side. As you relax into his embrace, you rest your head on his shoulder. For a few precious minutes, you both sit in silence, lost in your own thoughts.

Remus glances over at you, nearly doing a double-take at the display of affection. You have closed your eyes, seemingly oblivious to Remus' stare, but Sirius him. For a brief, tense moment, Remus and Sirius lock eyes, but then James regains Remus' attention.

“Sirius?” You ask, the weariness evident in your voice.

“Yeah?”

“Remember when you told James to get over Lily that he needed to get under someone else?” Sirius immediately senses the direction of the conversation, and a pang of regret twinges in his chest.

“Yes.”

“Do you think that really works?” You inquire, your tone tinged with uncertainty and a hint of desperation.

“For some people, maybe.” Sirius replies cautiously. He wants to admit that such tactics haven’t proven successful for him and probably never will.

You pull away to look at him, your eyes reflecting a mixture of hope and uncertainty, “Would you help me find someone?”

"There’s no way in hell I’m doing that." Sirius responds firmly, his tone leaving little room for negotiation. But before you can protest, he interjects, "I’ll be your distraction."

"How exactly?" Your voice tinged with uncertainty, unsure of what he means.

"However, you need me. I know I’m not the best study partner, but I’ll run through your flashcards with you whenever you need to study," Sirius offers, his voice softening as he glances from you to Remus. “I know you guys would talk about books a lot, so I’ll read whatever book you’re reading just to discuss it with you. Whatever you want me to do, Y/n, I’ll do it.”

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

“You and Y/n were cozy on that couch,” James comments casually, his gaze fixed on the ceiling from where he's sprawled out on his bed. Sirius glances over his shoulder at him, pausing his furious writing at the desk where he's been hunched over for the last twenty minutes.

“Hm. I guess so.” Sirius replies nonchalantly, but his voice’s a subtle tension.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” James' tone carries a note of genuine concern, and Sirius immediately feels the weight of his friend's apprehension settling over the room like a heavy blanket.

“Working on my homework? Yeah, it’s probably my best one yet.” Sirius responds, his tone strained as he tries to maintain composure.

“About comforting the girl you love because she’s in love with your best mate.” James continues, his words cutting through the air like a knife. Sirius freezes, the quill leaving a streak of ink across the paper as his thoughts whirl.

He refuses to turn around and face James, not wanting to see the pitying look he knows will be on his friend's face. Instead, he runs his hand through his hair in frustration, his emotions simmering beneath the surface.

“Surprised you figured it out.” Sirius grumbles, his voice laced with a mixture of defensiveness and resignation. He doesn’t want to confront the truth about your feelings for Remus. The mere thought of you falling in love with someone other than him ignites a pang of jealousy in his chest.

He wants to correct James, to insist that you aren’t in love with Remus, but it feels futile. The reality is too close for comfort, and he can't shake the feeling of impending loss.

“About your feelings? Or hers?” James questions, his head leaning back against his headboard as he studies Sirius, his expression searching.

Sirius climbs onto his bed, letting out a sigh of frustration once his head hits his pillow, the weight of the conversation heavy on his mind. “Both,” he admits, his voice tinged with uncertainty.

“I didn’t notice until today with Y/n. She looked devastated when Adeline was all over Remus. On the other hand, I’ve known you’ve had feelings for her for years. The things you do for her, you wouldn’t do for anyone else.” James observes, his tone tinged with a mix of understanding and concern.

Sirius doesn’t know what to say in response, but deep down, he knows James is right. He’s always treated you differently, gone the extra mile for you in ways he wouldn't for anyone else. He had just hoped it wasn’t so obvious.

James sighs loudly, the weight of the situation hanging heavy in the air, “You gotta be careful, mate. You’re gonna get your feelings hurt.”

“I’d rather my feelings be hurt than hers.” Sirius responds earnestly, his voice carrying a hint of determination.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

It was official. Remus Lupin and Adeline Reyes were officially dating. The news didn’t come as a surprise; Remus had been bringing her around more often lately. She seamlessly integrated herself into your group dynamic, joining you all at breakfast some mornings and effortlessly engaging in conversation as if she had been there for years. Adeline adeptly kept pace with Sirius’ quick quips and could outwit James with a witty comeback. She was quick to include Peter whenever James unintentionally overshadowed him in conversation and was always eager to discuss the next book you planned to read.

It was horrifically frustrating.

You wanted to dislike her, but deep down, you knew it was just jealousy clouding your judgment. Adeline was undeniably genuine and sweet; you could easily envision yourself becoming good friends with her. However, every time she affectionately pressed her lips to Remus’ cheeks or leaned into his side, it felt like a sharp pang reminding you of your own feelings and the heartwrenching situation you found yourself in.

It left a bitter taste in your mouth. Just a few weeks ago, that was your spot, and you were blissfully unaware of his feelings for another girl. You felt foolish, caught off guard. Was it all in your head? Had you merely romanticized every interaction with him? Built up a scenario that never truly existed?

"Y/n, this is the third time you've spaced out. Are you alright?" Lily's concerned voice broke through your thoughts as she settled beside you on the bed. Despite James's insistence on a get-together downstairs, you found your mind drifting elsewhere. It had been a couple of weeks since Remus and Adeline declared their relationship, and ever since then, your thoughts had been in turmoil.

You shrugged, "I'm okay. I just don't think I'm up for a party tonight."

"You haven't seemed in the party mood for weeks." Marlene remarked, her attention fixed on her reflection as she applied lip gloss. Sensing something amiss, she pivoted abruptly to face you.

"Is this about Remus and Adeline?" Lily's direct question made your stomach plummet.

"I, uh—no." You stammered, feeling as startled as you looked by her inquiry.

"Godric, you're a horrible liar." Marlene remarked, tossing the tube of sparkly gloss onto her bed before striding over to her trunk and flinging it open. "It's okay to miss your best friend. You two are practically glued to each other's sides. I'm sure it's odd not spending as much time with him anymore."

Lily observed the subtle shift in your demeanor as Marlene spoke, although Marlene herself was entirely engrossed in rummaging through her clothes until she emitted a satisfied hum.

Shoving a floral sundress into your hands, Marlene declared, "Here, you're not wearing your uniform tonight. Wearing something cute will make you feel better." Your fingers traced over the silky material, white with colorful flowers scattered across it. Marlene observed as you held up the dress, eyeing the spaghetti straps and milkmaid top with uncertainty.

"It's winter, Marlene." You pointed out your tone laced with practicality.

"We're inside. But if you do get cold, I’m sure Sirius would gladly warm you up." Marlene chirped, grinning at your surprised expression.

"Sirius is not going to warm me up." You grumbled as you stood up and headed to the bathroom with the dress in hand. With the door shut, you changed out of your uniform. You had to admit, the dress was pretty. Maybe Marlene was right; wearing something cute would boost your confidence and mood.

"Are you sure? You two have been awfully cozy lately!" Lily's laughter laced her tone as she called through the door. You slipped the dress on, then twisted in front of the mirror to assess how it looked. Concluding that you liked it, you also appreciated how it made you feel slightly brighter. It reminded you of a summer spent in Italy with your parents, where you practically lived in sundresses.

You turn open the door and twirl for the girls, who squeal in appreciation. Marlene snatches the lip gloss she had tossed aside, grabbing at your cheeks to dot some on your lips.

"We haven’t been cozy. We’re just acting like friends do." You mumble, your words slightly muffled from your cheeks being squished.

“Bullshit! You never snuggled Peter, never did with James before he got himself a girlfriend,” Marlene turned to wink at Lily. “Honestly, you never did with Remus either. But you and Sirius have been all over each other.”

“We have not!” You deny it, looking to Lily for support. But she only leans back on her hands and sends you a smug smile.

"The other day, I walked into the common room with James, and you were practically asleep on Sirius’ lap while he read to you.” Lily grins.

“He was reading to you? That’s the cutest thing I have ever heard. That’s your love language right there!” Marlene's gasp was filled with awe, and you didn't know how to respond. Because you had indeed fallen asleep on his lap while Sirius twirled a strand of your hair between his fingers absentmindedly as he read Pride and Prejudice to you. You hardly comprehended the story, too focused on Sirius’ voice and his gentle touch. It was the first time in weeks that you hadn’t thought of Remus.

“It was the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen Sirius do.” Lily agreed, nodding in approval. “I’m telling you, he has feelings for you. I’ve thought so ever since 5th year. He pretty much confirmed it when he gave you that red tulip.”

“A declaration of love!” Marlene practically sang, her excitement contagious.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

As you reached the bottom step with Marlene and Lily, you let out a sigh. The common room was bustling, with students scattered everywhere, making the air feel stuffy and warm. You briefly pondered what James’ definition of a get-together was, because this felt more like a full-blown party.

“James said he invited hardly anyone.” You muttered to Lily, who nodded in agreement.

“He’s a social butterfly, you never know with him.” Lily replied with a shrug, craning her neck to spot James amidst the crowd. She eventually spotted him near the fireplace, engaged in lively conversation with Sirius and a few other members of the Quidditch team. You allowed Lily to lead you through the throng of people, observing the lively atmosphere around you. Marlene had already disappeared into the crowd, no doubt on a mission to find Dorcas.

You can hear him before you see him: Sirius’ hearty laugh resonates over the music and the crowd’s chatter. It's a remarkable sound, drawing attention effortlessly. And there he is, standing tall next to James by the fireplace, a drink held casually in one hand while the other gestures animatedly as he converses with the guy beside him. Clad in a simple black T-shirt, Sirius exudes a captivating charm, and you can't help but admire how good he looks in the flickering firelight.

Though you'd never admit it aloud, Lily had been onto something. You and Sirius had been spending an increasing amount of time together. True to his word, Sirius had been a genuine distraction from your heartache. The activities you once shared with Remus were gradually being replaced by moments with Sirius.

It was no longer Remus, who you sat next to in the morning. No longer Remus, who you reviewed your flashcards with. No longer Remus, who would sit with you next to Black Lake and chat about your latest book. And no longer Remus, who would hold your hand to calm your anxiety every time you had to speak up in front of the class.

But it wasn’t like you had asked Sirius to do any of these things. It was Sirius who had started it, not in an attempt to replace what you had with Remus, but to remind you that he was there for you. That he would do anything to make you feel loved. Sirius wasn’t doing any of this because he felt obligated. He did it because he wanted you to know that you weren’t alone and that he didn’t plan on leaving any time soon.

But there were things that Sirius did that Remus had never done. Every morning, a cup of your favorite tea awaited at your spot next to him. He carried one of your scrunchies in his bag because you could never keep track of them, even offering to tie your hair up for you. Each time he walked around Black Lake, he brought you back a red tulip, which you tucked into the vase on your desk next to the others. You were building up quite the collection. 

Sirius bursts into laughter, but his mirth is interrupted by James' boisterous greeting. The sudden volume jerks your attention away from Sirius, and you find yourself facing Lily, who offers a halfhearted protest as James envelops her in a bear hug. You brace yourself as James turns his attention to you, lifting you up despite your protests about your dress. After he sets you down, a moment of imbalance is quickly rectified as you feel an arm slip around your waist, steadying you against someone's chest.

"He's had a few too many." Sirius whispers into your ear, his breath sending shivers down your spine. You lean into his embrace, relishing the warmth and familiarity of his touch before turning around to face him.

With your palms pressed against his chest, you offer him a warm smile. "Hi."

He still holds onto his drink, but his pointer finger slips under the strap of your dress, giving it a gentle tug. "This is cute," he murmurs, his voice now hushed compared to the near shouting from a minute ago. His eyes meet yours, and you feel a wave of warmth spread through you. No one has ever looked at you the way he's looking at you right now.

"Thank you." You reply softly, surprised at the tenderness in your own voice. But you know he hears you as he smiles before turning back to the conversation he was having with a few other guys.

Pushing down your disappointment, you adjust the straps of your dress and take a breath, scanning the room for someone else to chat with. However, Sirius surprises you by wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you gently into his side. He continues to talk, his voice much quieter this time, but the three subtle squeezes let you know he's still there if you need him.

Lily catches your eye and mouths, "I told you so."

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

You hadn't intended to eavesdrop, it was just a coincidence that you found yourself in the vicinity at that moment. 

"You know, everyone thought you and Y/n were gonna get together." Peter remarks, nudging Remus in the side. Remus turns to him, likely taken aback. From your vantage point, you can't see their faces, but you recognize their silhouettes. They're seated together on one of the couches, engaged in quiet conversation amid the lively atmosphere of the party. You had briefly slipped away from Sirius to grab a drink, but now you're starting to regret your decision.

"Y/n and I?" Remus's response is laced with surprise, confirming your suspicions. You stand frozen, a few feet away from the couch, feeling your stomach plummet. 

"Yeah, I think most people thought you already were. I mean, you guys spent so much time together." Peter continues, oblivious to the impact of his words. You try to avoid lingering on the past tense word.

"No, never," Remus hastily interjects. “I don’t think I could think of Y/n like that.” His words landed like a heavy blow to your chest. You feel a pang of disappointment and hurt ripple through you, sitting heavy in your stomach. With tears threatening to spill from your eyes, you pivot on your heel and stride purposefully toward your dormitory.

As you navigate through the bustling crowd, your lips utter excuse me, and I need to get through in a mechanical cadence. Each step feels heavier than the last, burdened by the weight of Remus's words and the shattered illusions they bring.

Finally, the door to your dormitory swings shut behind you with a resounding thud, the noise a stark contrast to the chaos of the party below. Alone in the silence of your room, you confront the raw emotions swirling within you, grappling with the harsh reality of unrequited feelings.

Tears blur your vision so severely that you nearly trip over your shoes in your haste to remove them. With trembling hands, you toss the covers over your body, seeking refuge in the soft embrace of your bed. You bury your face into the welcoming embrace of your pillow, heedless of the inevitable mascara stains that will be left behind. A strangled sob escapes your lips, muffled by the sanctuary of your pillow, as you grapple with the overwhelming wave of emotions crashing over you.

The noise of the party downstairs serves as a comforting cloak, allowing you to release your emotions freely and without judgment.

The abruptness with which Remus shut down any possibility of harboring feelings for you cuts deep, like a dagger to the heart. The ache in your chest feels all-consuming, a relentless reminder that you will never be with him. Despite the rational part of your mind knowing that his affection for Adeline precludes any possibility of reciprocating your feelings, the emotional turmoil still wreaks havoc on your fragile heart.

In the solitude of your room, you allow yourself to cry. With each passing moment, the ache in your chest deepens.

"Y/n? Oh, Godric." Lily exclaims, rushing to your side with concern etched across her features. She gathers your hair away from your tear-streaked face, her eyes taking in the sight before her: cheeks flushed and blotchy, mascara-tinged tears tracing down your cheeks, your hair in disarray. She had sensed something amiss when she spotted you hurrying up the stairs, but the depth of your distress caught her off guard.

"Y/n, what can I do? Do you want a glass of water? Can I, uh..." Lily's voice trembles with worry as she looks around the room, searching for anything that might bring you comfort. She's witnessed your tears before, but never like this, leaving her feeling utterly helpless.

"I don't need water. Can you..." Your voice breaks, choked with emotion, making it difficult to articulate your thoughts.

Lily watches as you clutch your pillow tighter, waiting for your next words. "Can I what?" She prompts gently.

"I just need..." You falter, another sob escaping your lips. "Sirius. I need Sirius."

Without hesitation, Lily nods, determined to find Sirius and bring him to your side. As she exits your dorm, you sink deeper into your pillow, allowing the tears to flow freely. Your mind races with questions, grappling with how to face Remus again and feign normalcy.

You're not completely taken aback by his words; the past few weeks have allowed you to gradually accept that Remus may not share your feelings. Yet, processing this realization privately was less painful than hearing his firm denial of any possibility of reciprocation. Perhaps there's a tinge of sorrow in acknowledging this truth, as it signifies a shift in your relationship with Remus—one that might never be quite the same again. Accepting this reality proves to be a bitter pill to swallow.

"Angel," Your body instinctively relaxes at the soothing sound of Sirius’s voice. The pillow is gently drawn from your grip, revealing Sirius’ concerned face as it comes into view. "What can I do? What do you need?" he asks, his tone brimming with genuine concern and care.

Kneeling by the side of your bed, his eyes brim with concern, evoking emotion that threatens to overwhelm you once more. You lie on your side, facing him, your makeup smudged and your eyes swollen from tears. Despite your disheveled appearance, he finds you the most beautiful girl in the world.

"Hold on." He murmurs softly before disappearing into your bathroom. The sound of running water fills the silence, a gentle reminder of his comforting presence. Moments later, he returns with a damp cloth in hand, his touch gentle yet firm as he kneels before you. With tender care, he cradles your jaw, his movements deliberate as he gently wipes away the remnants of makeup from your face, his actions speaking volumes of his unwavering support and affection.

"All clean," he whispers softly, discarding the cloth onto the ground with the intention of dealing with it later. "What do you need?"

"You." You sniffle, tugging gently at his hand to convey your desire for him to join you in bed. Without hesitation, Sirius kicks off his shoes and slips under the covers beside you. With a tender gesture, he reaches out, his hand gently brushing the hair away from your face as he settles in beside you. Your faces hover mere inches apart, a tantalizing proximity that he tries to distract from by focusing on the simple task of brushing your hair away, the urge to kiss you tugging at the corners of his mind.

"I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pull you away from the party." You murmur apologetically, your gaze meeting his. His eyes snap to yours, a flicker of offense crossing his features.

"I would drop anything for you." He responds earnestly, his sincerity shining through in his words, leaving no room for doubt. A sharp inhale escapes your lips as you stare back at him, the weight of his commitment settling between you.

"What happened, angel?" he asks gently, his eyes reflecting a hint of guilt for prying. As your eyes well up with tears once more, Sirius feels a pang of remorse for pressing the matter. He's about to apologize and suggest forgetting about it when you offer an answer, leaving him momentarily speechless.

"I overheard Peter and Remus." You confess, your voice trembling with vulnerability. Sirius forces down the surge of jealousy that threatens to consume him at the mention of Remus. 

"Peter told him that everyone thought he and I would get together." You continue, your words hanging in the air, heavy with disappointment and hurt. Sirius listens attentively, his heart aching for the pain etched in your voice.

"Remus told him that he couldn’t ever see me like that." You reveal, your voice wavering with emotion. "I know it’s stupid since he has a girlfriend, but-" You pause to draw in a shuddering breath, and Sirius gently brushes away the tears that cascade down your cheeks and over the bridge of your nose.

"It hurt," you confess, the rawness of your emotions laid bare. "That he’s never once seen me the way I have always seen him. We’ve always been just friends, and it sucks." Each word carries the weight of your longing and disappointment.

Sirius sighs, his voice tinged with empathy, "I love Remus, I do, but he can be blind sometimes. So in his head and down on himself that he misses what’s in front of him. And he truly missed out on the most perfect girl there is. But I promise you that there is a guy out there who will recognize what an angel you are, and he won’t ever let you go."

Your eyes well up with tears again, and Sirius starts to panic that he said something wrong. But then you're wrapping your arms around his waist and pressing your head into the crook of his neck.

Your voice is muffled as you speak, "Please stay here with me tonight?"

"Whatever you want, angel." Sirius responds tenderly, pressing a kiss to the top of your head, knowing there is no way he’d ever be able to deny you.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

James looks bewildered. "You aren’t going to sit with us?" he asks, confusion evident in his voice.

You stand behind your typical spot, observing the boys' reactions as they stare at you as though you've just delivered the worst news imaginable. For years, ever since you had met the boys, you had been sitting with them every day. This spot held a sense of familiarity and comfort, a symbol of your friendship with them. Thus, your decision to sit with the girls today comes as a major surprise.

Lily, Marlene, and Dorcas occupy seats further down the table. While they would occasionally join your circle, especially after Lily and James got together, Lily had once confided in you that she valued having space and prioritizing her friendships, too; she didn’t want to spend all her time with James. To everyone's surprise, James had been okay with this arrangement and had even agreed.

“I’m going to sit down the table with the girls. You’ll still be able to see me; we can wave at each other!” You offer James a hopeful smile, but he shakes his head, letting out a dramatic sigh.

Pointing his fork in your direction, James asserts, “It’s not the same, and you know it.”

“Sit with us, I feel like I hardly see you.” Remus protests and your stomach sinks as you make eye contact with him. Ever since you overheard Remus tell Peter he didn’t have feelings for you, you had been finding every excuse possible to avoid him.

It’s been a week since the party, and you can now admit that you've successfully avoided any alone time with Remus. By now, it's clear he senses something amiss. Every time he tries to approach you, you have an excuse ready for why you can't study together again or why you can't chat. What's worse is that it's only him you're avoiding. You still engage in normal chats with Peter in the common room and banter back and forth with James as usual. And Sirius, well, you hardly leave his side. Wherever you go, Sirius isn't far away, a constant presence by your side.

Not only that, but it seemed as if you couldn't get enough of each other—cuddled up on the common room couch, shoulder to shoulder during meals, and always side by side while walking to Black Lake. Sirius and you were growing increasingly closer with each passing day.

It was driving Remus crazy.

He looks at you pleadingly, his expression betraying the torment of seeing you drift away from him. You know his distress can't stem solely from your decision to sit with the girls. He started pulling away first, you think bitterly.

"Just wanted to spend some time with the girls, switch things up." You explain with a casual shrug, feeling a sense of awkwardness creeping over you as you shift on your feet. Remus wears a disappointed expression, while James and Peter appear to have already moved on, engaged in a bickering match over who gets the last orange.

"You've been switching things up quite a bit lately." Remus grumbles under his breath, his voice barely audible over the morning chatter in the dinning hall. Only Adeline catches his words as she pulls away to glance at his face, startled by the bitterness in his tone. Unaware of her scrutiny, Remus remains fixated on you, his expression betraying a mixture of longing and frustration.

"Okay, well, I’ll catch you guys later." You announce with a smile, and at that moment, Sirius glances up at you. He wants to tell you how much he'll miss you. Every morning, he eagerly anticipates the sight of your smile, the way you playfully bump your shoulder into his once you take your spot beside him. Your laughter and sweet smile are the highlights of his morning routine.

He'd gladly join you for breakfast with the girls if you asked.

To everyone's surprise, you sling your arms around Sirius' shoulders and tilt your head forward, looking at him from the side. Caught off guard, Sirius freezes in your embrace, trying desperately not to read too much into your unexpected touch.

"I'll wait for you so we can walk to class together. I'll miss you." You whisper, your lips pressing gently onto his cheek. A faint pink sheen of your lipgloss remains on his skin in the shape of your lips, a subtle reminder of your affection.

Before he can respond, you're already pulling away, leaving Sirius to watch you walk back to the girls. His cheeks flush, his mouth slightly parted in surprise. Remus narrows his eyes at the mark you've left behind while Adeline observes the interaction between Sirius and Remus, sensing Remus's agitation.

James lets out a low whistle. "She'll miss you, will she?" he remarks, his tone laced with amusement and curiosity.

“Oh fuck off, mate.” Sirius grumbles before taking a sip of his tea to try and hide his smile.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

You sigh, slumping down in your chair, "I don’t think I can handle another flashcard."

Sirius glances up from across the table, finding you lost in contemplation as you stare out the window. It's midday, and the sun's gentle rays illuminate the library, casting a warm glow despite the lingering chill outside. You both share the longing to step into the crisp air outdoors, yet Sirius remained steadfast in his commitment to assisting you with your studies.

"Do you wanna take a break?" Sirius asks, his gaze meeting yours as you glance up from the pile of books and notes spread out before you. Your lips press together, betraying the weight of your internal debate about whether you can afford to step away from your tasks.

"Come on, we can go for a walk." He encourages, his tone gentle yet persuasive as he begins to gather his belongings, preparing to pack his bag.

You concede, “A quick walk.”

The fresh air and the warmth of the sun against your skin felt rejuvenating after spending hours cooped up in the library. Your body ached, and your brain felt numb from the relentless studying. The only thing that kept you going was Sirius, who would slip you pieces of chocolate every time you answered a question correctly. Without him, you would have abandoned your studies hours ago.

As you walk, both of you are enveloped in a quiet tranquility, lost in your own thoughts. It's a comfortable silence, where neither of you feels compelled to fill the gaps with conversation. Instead, you simply bump into each other occasionally, exchanging shy smiles that speak volumes without a single word being uttered.

"Where are you taking me, Black?" You finally inquire, noting the direction as you pass Black Lake. You stroll leisurely, savoring the symphony of birdsong in the trees and the distant chatter of other students gradually fading into the background. Leaves shudder in response to the gentle breeze, prompting you to wrap your robes tighter around your body. Winter is approaching, and the biting chill in the air serves as a stark reminder of the season's impending arrival.

Sirius smiles in response, his expression warm and inviting, "Somewhere I think you'll like."

"Have I been there before?" You cast a glance at him, observing his wind-blown hair, cheeks flushed pink from the cold, and his bottom lip gently caught between his teeth.

"I hope not." He responds honestly, his voice carrying a hint of vulnerability. The possibility lingers, given that the boys are familiar with this field as well. The mere thought of Remus bringing you here tightens his chest. After all, you and Remus often took walks together, so it wouldn't be too surprising if he had.

Would Remus have brought you here, though? Sirius contemplates quietly. He's never heard you mention it, but he knows you would have. You've always cherished exploring the castle and eagerly shared your discoveries with the boys.

Sirius is startled when you suddenly gasp, excitement laced in your tone, "Oh my Godric. Is that a field of tulips?"

Sirius feels his heart swell at the excitement in your voice. Before he can respond, you stride ahead of him, drawn to the swath of red flowers like a magnet. He remains where he stands, content to watch you as you explore the vibrant field.

A pang of longing washes over him as he wishes he had Lily's muggle camera. This moment would undoubtedly be captured and proudly displayed above his desk among his collection of Polaroids.

"C'mere!" You call out excitedly, your hand extended towards him. Sirius grins, his heart lightening at your enthusiasm as he walks over to join you. Once he reaches you, he gladly grasps your hand, feeling a rush of warmth at the connection.

You lead him further into the field, your laughter carrying on the gentle breeze. Finally, you drop into the middle of the sea of tulips, tugging him along with you, and for a moment, the world feels suspended in the beauty of the moment.

Tilting your head towards the sun, you sigh happily. "I didn’t know this was here," you remark, your voice filled with wonder.

"Found it with the boys a couple of weeks ago." Sirius responds, his fingers idly twirling a blade of grass he plucked from the ground.

"Did you pick the tulips you gave me from here?" You inquire, your voice soft with curiosity. Sirius nods in response, a faint blush gracing his cheeks as he recalls the memory. He's relieved that your eyes are still closed, blissfully unaware of his flustered state.

For a few minutes, a comfortable silence settles between you both, allowing the tranquility of the moment to envelop you like a warm embrace.

"Can I tell you something?" You ask, tilting your head back down to look at him, your gaze soft yet curious.

"Anything," Sirius replies, his voice filled with warmth and genuine interest.

"I've never been given flowers before. Whenever you give me a tulip, it's the highlight of my day." You admit softly, shifting so you're sitting with your legs crossed, a vulnerable honesty coloring your words.

"You've never been given flowers? Ever?" Sirius questions, his surprise evident in his tone and expression. You shake your head in response, confirming his disbelief.

He can't even fathom it. How could no one ever have given you flowers before? How does the girl who constantly doodles flowers on her notes never receive them? The thought perplexes him, stirring a mix of incredulity and a newfound determination to ensure you receive the appreciation you deserve.

"Guess I'll be making up for that then." Sirius decides, his voice showing determination as he sends you a devastating smile. Your stomach flutters at the sight.

"Sirius." you say softly, drawing his attention.

"What, angel?" He responds, his tone gentle and attentive.

"Thank you. For being by my side through everything." You express with sincerity, your voice filled with gratitude. 

In the past few weeks, Sirius has been a constant presence by your side. Whenever Remus kissed Adeline, Sirius would offer a comforting touch, silently understanding your feelings. He'd weave silly stories to divert your attention from Adeline's flirtations with Remus, ensuring you never felt alone for even a moment.

He grins in response, "There's nowhere else I'd rather be."

“Nowhere else, huh?” Your tone is teasing, and Sirius merely rolls his eyes at you, a playful glint dancing in his eyes. You observe him as he picks tulips one by one, gradually assembling a bundle in his hand. Watching him put together a bouquet that you know he will give you fills you with a sense of anticipation. Everything about sitting in a field of flowers with Sirius makes you feel lightheaded as if you're caught in a blissful dream.

Come to think of it, lately, every time Sirius did something for you, it left you feeling dizzy.

"You know it's true. I ditched Hogsmeade this weekend to spend time with you in the library." Sirius says, a hint of amusement in his voice as he recalls the decision.

"That's true, but I did advise you against it. I doubt a day in the library is much of a weekend highlight for you." You reply, raising an eyebrow playfully.

"If you think seeing you surrounded by a field of flowers isn't a weekend highlight, then you're sorely mistaken. Easily a monthly highlight for me." Sirius adds, his eyes sparkling with fondness as he gazes at you amidst the scenic beauty.

“You flirt.” You giggle, your laughter echoing in the tranquil atmosphere, before reclining on the grass and shutting your eyes.

Sirius' features soften at your playful remark. "Only for my favorite girl," he responds tenderly, his voice carrying warmth and affection as he watches over you.

What started as a short walk stretched into two hours spent in the flower field, immersed in conversation and selecting the loveliest blooms together. By the end, Sirius presented you with a bundle of tulips in various hues. Upon entering your dorm room with the flowers in hand, Lily's gasp was so pronounced that it startled you.

“Tell me that Sirius got you those.”

"He picked them for me." You beam, offering the bouquet to Lily for her admiration. "I mean, I helped too, but it was mostly him.”

“Who knew that he was such a romantic?” Marlene gushed, sitting next to Lily on her bed to take a peek.

“I told you he’s into you! Look at these flowers!” Lily cried out, flopping back onto her bed with the flowers pressed into her chest. Marlene laughs from beside her.

You rolled your eyes affectionately, “We're just friends.” Marlene scoffs.

"No, you're not. That little stunt at breakfast you pulled this morning. Hugging him from behind and kissing him? Definitely not platonic." Marlene remarks, her tone teasing yet observant. Embarrassment floods through you; you hadn't planned on being so affectionate with Sirius; it just happened. You're grateful Sirius didn't bring it up; you probably would have collapsed if he had. 

"I just kissed his cheek!" you defend, feeling a blush rise to your cheeks.

Lily grins mischievously. "You should've seen how he looked at you when you walked away."

"Totally lovesick!" Marlene exclaims, adding her enthusiastic agreement to Lily's observation.

"Both of you are being ridiculous. He doesn’t have feelings for me, and even if he did, I need to get over Remus first." Taking the bouquet from Lily, you stride toward your desk to add them to your glass jar full of other flowers. You're almost out of the room. Soon you’ll have to pluck out the ones that are dropping, but you don’t have the heart to do it yet.

The girls were fully aware of the situation. You explained to them why you were so upset the morning after the party. There was no way you could have pretended like something wasn’t wrong. With Sirius sleeping in your bed and your swollen eyes, there was no hiding anything.

"First?" Lily's voice carries a hint of excitement, exchanging a giddy look with Marlene.

You pivot, leaning against your desk. "What?"

"You said first. Like once you get over Remus, you could see yourself being with Sirius."

"No, I didn't." You protest, embarrassment flooding your stomach.

Marlene's grin widens mischievously as she exchanges a knowing glance with Lily. "Oh, but you did. We both heard you."

A nervous laugh escapes your lips as you playfully roll your eyes, "Oh, fuck off, guys.” 

Your friends continue to tease you, their laughter filling the room. Perhaps you were starting to form feelings for Sirius, but you preferred to keep them close to your heart, away from the probing eyes of Lily and Marlene, who always seemed to pick up on every subtle shift in your emotions.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

“There you are! I was worried sick!” James exclaims as Sirius opens the door to the dorm. Remus glances up from his book, while Peter remains focused on his homework, unfazed by James' dramatics. Sirius, lost in memories of his afternoon with you, barely registers James' words as he flops onto his bed, a goofy smile lingering on his lips.

It's only when James tosses his pillow at Sirius that he snaps back to reality.

“Oi! What was that for?” Sirius protests, finally acknowledging James' presence with a bemused expression.

“You’re ignoring me!” James accuses, crossing his arms.

Sirius stammers, “I wasn’t! I was just-“

James interrupts, a mischievous glint in his eyes, “Daydreaming about Y/n? What did you two get up to anyways?”

Remus stiffens, lowering his book to look at Sirius, “You were with Y/n today?”

Sirius sits back up and exchanges a tense glance with Remus, “Yeah, I was.”

He turns to James, “Helped her study a bit.” He neglects to mention the flower field, wanting to keep that memory to himself. Plus, he knows the boys will tease them every chance they get.

James stares at Sirius, incredulity flashing across his face. "That's all? Sounds boring. Should've come to Hogsmeade with us."

Sirius is about to respond when Remus interjects, his tone betraying a hint of disbelief. "I'm sorry. You turned down Hogsmeade to study? With Y/n?" His eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

Sirius shrugs, his tone nonchalant. "No need, mate. I've got her."

Remus furrows his brow, considering Sirius's response. "I can still ask her, give her another option," he suggests casually, but there's an undertone of something that Sirius can't quite decipher.

Sirius tenses, meeting Remus's gaze head-on. He's unsure if Remus is hinting at something deeper or if he's simply offering another study option. Nevertheless, Sirius feels a pang of reluctance at the thought of giving up his time with you, even for studying.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

Peter huffed, practically slamming himself on the couch next to you, his frustration evident in the way he dropped onto the couch. “Remus and Adeline are getting on my last nerve.”

James glanced up from where he was sitting across from you, his attention momentarily diverted from the game of cards. His eyebrows raised in curiosity as he observed Peter's demeanor. "They makin’ out in the dorm again?" he questioned, a playful grin tugging at the corners of his lips.

You turn your head to hide your reaction, your stomach churning with familiar discomfort. After nearly two months of their relationship, you still felt uneasy hearing about them together, effectively reminding you of your lingering feelings for Remus.

It would be a lie to say that your feelings for Remus hadn’t changed. In fact, you were beginning to notice a subtle shift in your perspective, a gradual easing of the discomfort that once swarmed your chest at the sight of him and Adeline together. That twinge of jealousy you used to feel when looking at them was easing up, instead being replaced by a dull ache in your chest.

You found yourself increasingly preoccupied with thoughts of Sirius, his image and the memories of your time together occupying your mind more frequently than before. You caught yourself smiling at the little moments you shared, replaying conversations and gestures, finding comfort in the warmth of his presence even when he wasn't around.

Peter shook his head against the cushion, his expression irritated. "No, they’re bickering. They've been at it for nearly twenty minutes. Couldn’t get a damn thing done on this essay.”

James wore a look of surprise as he arched his eyebrow, “They’re fighting?”

Peter looked away from the fire to glance over at James blankly, “No, bickering. There’s a difference.” His tone is matter-of-fact and laced with frustration.

“We’ll be quiet, Peter. Work on your essay.” You promise, sending the blond boy a soft smile.

James’ lips curve in a mischievous grin, eyes lit up with amusement, “Guess all relationships have to come out of the honeymoon phase.” He quips, tone playful with satisfaction. Peter sighs, tipping his head back onto the headrest of the couch like he can’t take anymore.

“James, it’s your turn.” You call, the gentle tap of your pointer finger against the cards catches his attention. His eyes flicker down to the cards sprawled between you both before glancing back up at you.

“Did you at least appreciate my pun?” He asks, a hopeful upturn of his lips present.

“It was wonderful.” You affirm, voice soft as if you’re telling a young child that their artwork is the most beautiful thing you have ever seen.

James’s face lights up with a satisfied smile, and his voice is full of teasing gratitude, “Thank you, Y/n. I knew you would have my back.”

“What does she have your back about?” Sirius’ voice cuts through the air, his sudden appearance causing you and James to glance over at him. Peter opens one eye as Sirius sits on the couch next to him.

James stares at the cards while debating his next move, “She appreciates me for who I am. Maybe you should take some notes from her.” 

Sirius hardly hears James. Instead, his eyes flicker over to you. He finds himself entranced by the subtle movements of your features, the way your eyebrows furrow in playful impatience as you await James to decide. The glow from the fire is dancing over your face, and he has the urge to reach out and touch your cheek, tracing over where the heat has touched. You look gorgeous like this, drenched in the soft light of the fire and so at ease. The words are at the tip of his tongue, but he swallows them down.

As your eyes meet his, a gentle smile graces your lips, and Sirius feels his stomach flip and heart stutter. You’re looking at him with so much warmth that you could rival the fire next to you, and he knows he never wants to forget the way you’re looking at him.

Amidst the crackle of the fire and the soft murmurs of the surrounding conversations, it’s then that Sirius is struck by the sudden realization that sends shockwaves throughout his entire body. He is hit with the truth that he’s been avoiding for ages; he is entirely and desperately in love with you.

Sirius grapples with a fact that feels almost suffocating in its intensity. His gaze falls to his lap, the reality of his situation weighing heavily upon him. He’s in love with a girl who holds feelings for someone else. Not just someone else, but Remus. His best mate, who, as of lately, has shown increasing concern about the nature of your relationship with Sirius. The way he pinches his brows together when you laugh at a joke Sirius makes, the subtle shifts in his demeanor whenever you show Sirius affection- it’s all Sirius can focus on. Remus sees you in a different light, and it’s making Sirius uneasy.

And so, he sits in silence, grappling with the truth that he’s fallen for a girl that will never be his.

“Sirius,” You say softly, your hand gently resting atop his, hoping to bring him back from his thoughts. His eyes dart up to meet yours, and you smile softly. “You okay? You’re quiet.”

No, he isn’t. 

But instead, he offers a reassuring smile and squeezes your hand, “I’m okay, angel. Just tired.”

“Not too tired to lose to me in cards, are you?” James interjects, sporting a cocky grin and cracking his knuckles in intimidation. “I’m tired of playing with Y/n. She wins every time.”

Sirius laughs, hauling himself off the couch to sit beside you both before shuffling the cards.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

“Y/n.” You startle at Remus’ voice, nearly spilling your cup of tea down your front. He sends you a soft smile, sitting beside you on the couch. You set your tea on the table next to you. Sitting up and shifting your legs to the side and underneath you, you make room for him. The way you were stretched out before hardly allowed him any room.

“Rem.” You greet him, sending him a gentle smile. The corners of his mouth lift at the nickname; he hasn’t heard it for a while.

He leans back against the couch, gaze firm on you, “How was your day?” His voice is gentle and soothing. His voice was always one of your favorite things about him, always a source of comfort to you.

“It’s been alright, not too much to say about it,” Your left shoulder lifts up into a shrug, and you rest your right arm against the couch to prop your head up. Bodies both facing each other. “How was yours?”

“James nearly singed off my eyebrows in potions,” He says amusedly. He’s got bags under his, and his body seems tired. You cringe when you remember the full moon was just a few days ago.

“Not entirely surprising,” You remark with a laugh, mind trailing to all the times James had proved himself not the best partner. As much as you loved James, his tendency to get distracted had cost you during classes plenty of times before. 

“How’s Adeline?” You ask politely, the words coming out with practiced ease despite the uncomfortable feeling in your stomach. Remus’s smile falters, and he lets out a sigh, gaze drifting away from you.

“I don’t know.” He admits, hand coming up to run through his hair. He won’t meet your eye.

“You don’t know?” Your brow is quirks in curiosity, and genuine concern is etched onto your features. Memories of Peter complaining about the two bickering flickers back from a week ago.

“She’s not happy,” Remus confesses, his tone is heavy with resignation. “Disappearing for a couple days doesn’t exactly make me boyfriend of the year.”

You nod sympathetically. You understand, if you were in the dark about your boyfriend’s whereabouts for a couple days, you would be upset as well.

“Are you going to tell her?” You asked gently. It felt weird to talk to Remus again after going nearly two months without much interaction. All your time used to be spent with Remus, but Sirius seems to have taken that spot nowadays.

His gaze meets yours as he nervously bites at his bottom lip, he seems apprehensive,“I don’t know if she could handle it.”

“Rem,” You begin, voice soft and resolute, a reflection of the support you have always offered him. Despite the change in your relationship, your commitment to being there for him remains. “She deserves to know, especially if the two of you want to be together.”

His brows are pinched tightly together as he wrings his hands together, “What if she doesn’t take it well? What if she tells-”

You interject gently, “You’ve been dating two months, you should have a feel for how she would react.” 

He meets your eye with an uncertainty, “Y/n.”

“Yeah?” You respond, voice quiet.

“I don’t know if I can tell her. I don’t think it will be as easy as telling you was.”

“You shouldn’t compare her to me.”

“But I do.” Remus whispers, the gravity of his admission catching you off guard. His shoulders are hunched over as he rests his elbows on his knees, hands still nervously wringing together as he looks over at you.

Your breath is caught in your throat. You break eye contact to clear your throat, shifting uneasily on the couch.

“Adeline is your girlfriend, and I’m just your friend. You really shouldn’t compare us, Rem. If you want to be with Adeline, you should really think about telling her.” You murmur, truth stinging as it leaves your mouth.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

Marlene sighs, her voice laced with playful incredulity, "Sometimes I wonder how James Potter managed to get you." Sirius barks out a laugh from his spot across from you, his amusement echoing around the room. Lily's mischievous grin widens as she shoots a playful wink at Marlene, enjoying the banter.

"I'm a damn catch, McKinnon!" James retorts dramatically, pulling Lily even closer into his side, the affection between them palpable. Lily leans up to press a kiss on James’ jaw, a tender moment amidst the playful teasing.

"That lapdance you just gave your girlfriend? Horrific." Marlene shakes her head with exaggerated disdain, her expression a mix of amusement and mock disgust.

"If you didn't wanna see it, then you wouldn't have dared me to do it," James fires back with a smirk, the competitive edge still in his tone.

You're all gathered in a circle, indulging in a juvenile game of truth or dare. The boys took charge, rearranging the furniture into a circle so everyone could sit comfortably.

Marlene had insisted upon it, likely hoping to be roped into a dare that would bring her closer to Dorcas. 

You're seated on one of the couches beside Lily, with James on her other side and Peter beside him. Adeline occupies the space to Peter’s left, seated next to Remus on one of the smaller couches. Sirius has claimed an armchair for himself. Marlene and Dorcas are cozied up in another armchair, much to Marlene's delight over the seating arrangement.

While Remus had yet to tell Adeline about his lycanthropy, he was attempting to make amends with her. You sent him a sweet smile and thumbs up when you saw them walking in together. It was clearly tense between the two, but that was to be expected.

Amidst the laughter and playful exchanges, you had failed to notice the tension simmering between Sirius and Remus, evident in the disgruntled glances they exchanged at being seated next to each other.

James turns to you with a devious grin, “My sweet Y/n, you will be picking dare.”

“Excuse me? You can’t pick for me!” You retort, sending James an incredulous look.

“But I have the best dare for you!” James insists, leaning closer with a mischievous glint in his eye.

“No.” You refuse, shaking your head slightly.

“Y/n, please.” He pleads, attempting to send you puppy dog eyes. Marlene snorts from beside you.

Lily sighs, “Y/n, do the dare. He will beg you all night.” You roll your eyes, letting out a sigh that immediately lets James know you have given in.

“Kiss the person you are most attracted to in this room.” Your stomach sinks like a stone, regretting your lack of resistance to James. The group around you comes alive with oohs, except for Remus and Sirius, who sit uneasily, their expressions displaying discomfort.

“Absolutely not. I can’t!” Sirius feels sick. You’re refusing because you can’t kiss Remus- that has to be it. 

“Sorry, can’t back out now! Make your way over to the lucky guy.” James sounds far too cheery to be sorry.

The tension in the air becomes palpable as everyone awaits your decision. You draw in a deep breath, summoning your courage before rising to your feet and crossing the room toward him. The anticipation is almost tangible as your friends murmur excitedly, their eyes fixed on you.

You come to a sudden halt, feeling your knees bump against his as he instinctively sits straighter in his chair. Sensing your approach, he spreads his thighs slightly, silently inviting you to take the space between them. His demeanor shifts, a mix of anticipation and apprehension evident in his expression.

"Might make it easier if you sit in his lap." Marlene suggests with a mischievous grin, earning a pointed glare from you over your shoulder.

"You can, angel," he murmurs sweetly, reaching out to gently grasp your hand, his touch reassuring and electric. 

You let out a shaky sigh, feeling a rush of nerves as you ease yourself into his lap, your knees sinking into the cushion and your thighs naturally bracketing his. Ignoring the whistles and playful comments that ring out from your friends, you focus on the warmth of his body beneath you, the steady rhythm of his breath, and the way his hands hover uncertainly before settling lightly on your hips.

"We're waiting!" James calls out, amusement laced in his tone, his eyes sparkling with mischief. Feeling a rush of determination, you gently bring your hand to his cheek, the warmth of his skin sending a shiver down your spine and lowering your head towards his. He's quick to meet you, his breath mingling with yours, noses bumping softly in a moment of sweet anticipation.

He's patient, his breath mingling with yours as he waits for you to make the first move. With a tender touch, you tilt your face closer, feeling the gentle brush of your lips against his in the softest kiss. For a fleeting moment, you both linger there, foreheads pressed together, lost in the moment’s intimacy.

“Tell me this isn’t because you couldn’t kiss him.” His voice is raspy, filled with longing, sending your mind spiraling. His voice is quiet, ensuring that no one will hear him but you.

“You’re the only one I thought of.” You admit softly, hoping you don’t sound nearly as wrecked as you feel.

Sirius surges forward, his lips meeting yours with a passion that catches you off guard, causing a surprised moan to settle in your throat, lost in the whirlwind of sensations and emotions. Your friends' whistles and hollers fade into the background, overshadowed by the intensity of your focus on Sirius.

Your fingers weave through his hair, a silent plea to draw him closer, to merge the space between you. His hand glides from your hip, settling tenderly against your cheek, his thumb tracing gentle circles across your skin. When you roll your hips involuntarily, Sirius lets out a tortured groan and your blood simmers.

"Okay, okay! We've seen enough!" James hollers, his voice breaking you both out of the moment. As James's voice echoes through the air, you part from Sirius, the gravity of what you have both just done settles in. Your chests heave in unison, lips swollen from kisses and cheeks flushed.

Frozen, you and Sirius sit there, stunned, oblivious to the teasing of your friends. The air crackles with tension as you both lock gazes, the desire to lean in and kiss him again overwhelming you.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

Your mind remains frazzled in the aftermath of kissing Sirius. No matter how much you attempt to push it away, it's as though your body stubbornly clings to the memory of his lips upon yours, as if you're still nestled in his lap, feeling the gentle pressure of his hands on your hips. Both of you exchanged shy smiles as you gently slid off his lap, yet inside, your stomach churned with disappointment at the prospect of returning to your previous seat. Truthfully, you wanted to linger longer, to settle beneath his arm, and remain close to him.

In all honesty, Remus didn't even flicker into your thoughts when James issued his dare. The realization of this truth sends a shiver down your spine. When had Sirius managed to steal the place in your thoughts that Remus had held for so long?

Perhaps it was in the way he had cared for you like no one else ever had.

The sight of a steaming cup of tea, reliably waiting for you in your designated spot at the table. Even when he could have been enjoying himself in Hogsmeade, he chose to stay behind and help you study, just because you mentioned not having Remus to study with. And the simple yet heartfelt gesture of presenting you with fresh tulips just because you mentioned you had never gotten flowers before.

How had you moved on from Remus without even noticing? Perhaps that subtle ache in your chest whenever you glanced at Remus and Adeline stemmed from the change in friendship between you both. Maybe those tear-filled initial weeks spent with Sirius comforting you were a form of grieving the relationship that could never be with Remus. 

While Sirius helped you to get over Remus, he had been gently guiding you toward developing feelings for him instead without even realizing it.

After watching your kiss with Sirius, Remus withdrew from the game entirely. The memory of your intimate moment with Sirius replayed incessantly in his mind, each repetition adding to the sting in his chest. In a fleeting moment of vulnerability, he had allowed himself to entertain the hope that it might have been him you chose to kiss. However, the presence of Adeline at his side swiftly extinguished that flicker of optimism, leaving him feeling profoundly disappointed and conflicted with himself.

The sight of Sirius enveloping you in his arms, and the undeniable chemistry between the two of you, stirred a thick feeling of dread in his stomach.

Each soft kiss, each exchanged glance, seemed to intensify the bitter pang of jealousy gnawing at his insides. It was as though a veil had been lifted, revealing a reality he had been trying to deny—the depth of his feelings for you. And the realization that he might lose you for good.

"Remus! Truth or dare?" Dorcas inquired, her eyes alight with mischief.

Remus let out a resigned sigh; he wasn't particularly in the mood to deal with a dare.

"Truth," he replied, hoping for a relatively simple question.

Dorcas wasted no time in posing her question, a soft smile playing on her lips. "Who was your first big crush?"

The simplicity of the question drew an immediate protest from James. "Lame!" he squawked, his tone dripping with dissatisfaction. "Ask him something better."

Marlene swiftly came to Dorcas's defense, her voice laced with defiance. "Back off, James," she retorted sharply. "She can ask whatever the hell she wants,” She bit out before turning to Dorcas. “Great question, love." Her words sounded entirely lovesick.

"Uh, my first big crush was Y/n." Remus confessed, his gaze darting toward you, eager to gauge your reaction amidst the tension. However, he failed to notice the subtle tensing of Adeline beside him, her expression morphing into one of disbelief as his words hung in the air.

Your brows furrowed, a mixture of confusion and frustration etched across your features as you processed Remus's unexpected admission. The weight of his words lingered, casting a palpable awkwardness over the group as you responded with an unimpressed look.

Sirius felt a surge of nausea rising within him, his gaze narrowing at Remus before anxiously darting over to you, waiting with bated breath to see how you would react to Remus's unexpected confession. Each second felt like an eternity as he searched for any sign of your thoughts or emotions, his heart pounding in his chest with a mixture of dread and anticipation.

As he watched your expression carefully, Sirius couldn't help but wonder what you were thinking. Were you filled with hope at his confession? Did you still want him?

“That’s not funny, Rem.” You retort, sending him an entirely unimpressed look.

“I’m not joking.” He insists, his voice has a hint of vulnerability in it. Adeline sends him an incredulous look, but his eyes are solely trained on you.

“That’s bullshit.” You countered, your voice laced with frustration as you pushed back. The tension between you and Remus was palpable, your friends watching both of you carefully. Unsure if they should intervene or not.

“It’s not. Started fourth year, I liked you for years.” Remus confesses, hand tugging through his hair in frustration.

“You said you would never have feelings for me.” Your brows are pinched in disbelief, your voice filled with hurt and frustration.

Remus looks entirely confused, “What are you talking about?”

“With Peter! At the party like a month ago.” You exclaim, memory fresh in your mind. While your feelings for Remus may have faded, the pain from his words hadn’t.

Remus shakes his head slowly, eyes searching yours for understanding, “I never said that, love.”

“You did. You told Peter, ‘I don’t think I could ever think about Y/n like that.’” You reiterated, your voice tinged with disappointment as Remus’s expression faltered, his own words echoing back to him.

“You didn’t hear the rest then.” He says, his voice filled with regret and desperation for you to understand.

Your frustration has bubbled to the surface, “Oh, great. So glad I didn’t stay to hear you continue about how awful it is that everyone thought we would end up together.” Your words are a mixture of sarcasm and hurt

"Y/n, I-" Remus began, his voice trailing off as you cut him off with a sharp interruption.

"Do you know what that feels like? To hear your best friend talk about you with so much disgust?" you demanded, the hurt evident in your voice as you confronted him head-on.

"I wasn’t disgusted!" Remus protested, his own frustration rising to meet yours. "You didn’t hear the rest!" he insisted, his tone tinged with desperation as he struggled to convey his side of the story.

"What else did you say?" It was Adeline who broke the tense silence, her voice cutting through the air like a knife. Remus's gaze shifted to her, startled by her sudden interjection. Her expression was one of disbelief, her brows furrowed and her arms crossed tightly over her chest, a silent testament to her own confusion and dismay at the unfolding situation.

"I said I didn’t think I could think about you like that because of-" Remus's voice faltered, his words hanging in the charged air. You leaned forward, your frustration palpable as you awaited his explanation, your gaze unwavering as you demanded clarity.

"Because of what, Remus?" You pressed, the tension thickening with each passing moment. Remus's eyes darted briefly to Sirius, a flicker of hesitation betraying his inner turmoil, but you caught the movement.

Sensing the rising tension, you glanced over at Sirius, who watches Remus with a tense look. His expression carried a silent message. Urging Remus to choose his words carefully.

“Don’t you fucking dare.” Sirius grits out, his voice laced with a raw edge of warning. Remus's uncertainty is evident as he grapples with what he’s just implied.

“Do you still have feelings for her?” Adeline's voice trembles with devastation as she poses the question, her heart laid bare in the vulnerability of the moment. Sirius's reaction is immediate; he stands up abruptly, his movements tense with unspoken frustration as he strides towards the stairs, refusing to linger for Remus's response.

“Sirius.” You call out desperately, rising to your feet swiftly to intercept him. He starts heading for his dorm, but you gently grab his wrist and guide him toward yours instead. Without a word, he follows your lead until you reach your door, both of you stepping inside quietly.

Sirius doesn’t utter a word, his silence filling the space between you as he leans back against your door. His head tilts upward, his gaze fixed on the ceiling as if searching for answers in its expanse. 

You step closer, closing the distance between you, your footsteps echoing softly in the quiet room. With a gentle touch, you place your hand on his cheek, a tender gesture designed to draw his attention back to you. You find yourself more preoccupied with Sirius than the recent events downstairs. Dealing with the situation involving Remus can wait; at this moment, your main concern is resolving things with Sirius.

He lets out a sigh, the weight of his emotions palpable as he drops his gaze from the ceiling to meet yours. "I'm sorry," he murmurs, his voice laced with a mixture of remorse and vulnerability.

You can't help but laugh incredulously at his apology, the sound carrying a blend of surprise and amusement. "What are you sorry for?" You inquire, your tone gentle yet tinged with curiosity, as you search his eyes for the answer.

He sighs, “That you found out this way.”

“About what?” You both know that you already know the answer but that you just want him to say it.

“About Remus’s feelings for you, about my feelings for you.” Sirius admits, his voice soft as he swallows harshly.

You take a deliberate step closer to him, closing the gap between you with a sense of purpose. "And what are your feelings for me?" you repeat, your tone carrying a playful lilt, a silent challenge lingering in your words, daring him to bare his heart to you.

"Y/n," he pleads softly, his hands instinctively finding their place on your hips, drawing you closer to him just an inch. “Remus pretty much spelled it out, didn’t he?”

"I don’t want to hear it from Remus, I want to hear it from you.” You assert, your voice tinged with determination as you press closer to him. His eyes flit down to the diminishing space between your bodies.

He sighs, a soft exhalation laden with unspoken emotions, “You drive me crazy.” He confesses, shaking his head in gentle disbelief. A grin spreads across your face, your heart lightening at the familiar banter between you.

"Yeah? Is that all?" you tease, a playful glint in your eyes as your arms rise to encircle his neck, drawing him closer.

His gaze softens, a hint of vulnerability shining through as he meets your eyes. "I’m crazy about you, have been since the moment I met you." He confesses, his voice filled with sincerity and warmth.

His words ignite a flutter of excitement in the pit of your stomach, a giddiness that bubbles up from within. Unable to contain the surge of emotions, you rise onto your toes, closing the gap between you as your lips meet his in a gentle kiss. He lets out a surprised hum, circling his arms around your waist and hauling you into him.

He pulls back slightly, resting his forehead on yours, his expression tinged with uncertainty, "Y/n,” He murmurs, his voice laced with apprehension, “I can’t do this if you still want Remus.”

You pull back slightly, creating a small space between you yet maintaining the intimacy of your connection as you gaze into his eyes. "Do you think I would have followed you if I still wanted Remus?" You inquire softly, your voice imbued with sincerity.

"I meant every word when I told you that you were the only one I thought of for James’ dare." You continue, your words carrying a gentle reassurance, seeking to dispel any lingering doubts or insecurities that may linger between you.

"I want you, Sirius." You whisper earnestly, your voice soft yet resolute, laying bare your desires and intentions as you seek clarity and connection with him.

The smile he gives you is radiant, brimming with unabridged happiness, illuminating his features with an undeniable warmth that reflects the depth of his emotions.

"I've been dreaming of you saying that for ages." You squeal with uncontainable delight as he dips down and scoops you up, your legs instinctively circling his waist. Together, you embark on a journey towards your bed, his steps sure and purposeful, each movement imbued with a sense of anticipation and excitement.

He settles onto the bed, seating you gently in his lap, and you can't help but giggle uncontrollably, the sound filling the room with infectious joy as you revel in the sheer exhilaration of the moment shared between you.

As you lean down and press your lips onto his, he exhales softly, as if shedding all his worries, finding true peace in the gentle brush of your lips against his. He's never encountered a feeling of rightness as profound as this throughout his life. He is completely done for.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

Lily and Marlene didn't return to the dorm last night. After the awkward end to your game of truth or dare, you assumed they were giving you some space. And frankly, you were grateful for it. 

You weren't eager to delve into the topic of Remus confessing his past feelings for you. Although he didn't explicitly reveal whether or not those feelings still lingered, the reactions from both Adeline and Sirius served as a telling response.

You knew that a conversation with Remus was inevitable. Yet nervousness gnawed at you. What if there was no salvaging what remained of your friendship? Despite the awkwardness of the past few months, the desire to keep him in your life persisted, making the conversation all the more important.

The night unfolded with you and Sirius intertwined, lost in stolen kisses and hushed conversations within the dimly lit dorm. You had never felt so content in your whole life. Being with Sirius felt like a breath of fresh air. There were no lingering doubts about his feelings; his actions spoke volumes, leaving no room for uncertainty. Reflecting on the past, you couldn't help but wonder how you had ever been so blind to his affections.

“You almost ready m’love?” Sirius called, casting a glance your way as he deftly tied his tie in front of your mirror.

His endearment sent a flutter through your heart. It felt as though the kiss with Sirius last night had unleashed a torrent of emotions, flooding your senses with newfound intensity. It sent a thrill through your body, yet you felt somewhat disheartened as well. How had you managed to overlook Sirius for so long? He had been there all along, yet you found yourself pining over Remus, who had seemed indifferent to your feelings.

"Yeah, whenever you’re ready." You offered a soft smile as you slipped on your final shoe, steadying yourself with a gentle grip on the bedpost.

You stood up, making your way over to Sirius who met you halfway, placing his hands on your hips. You wrapped around your arms around his neck, pulling yourself closer to him. He smiled down as you, tucking a stray lock of hair behind your ear before putting his hand back to your hip.

You rose to your full height, crossing the distance to Sirius, who advanced to meet you halfway, his hands finding their place on your hips. You encircled your arms around his neck, drawing yourself nearer to him. He smiled warmly down at you, delicately tucking a stray lock of hair behind your ear before returning his hand to your hip.

"How do you want to go about this?" Sirius asked his brow furrowing with a hint of unease, his gaze searching yours for guidance.

Your brow pinched in confusion, "Go about what? Us?" For a brief moment, the idea crossed your mind – did Sirius want to go back to the way things were before? However, that thought evaporated as quickly as it appeared when you recalled the firmness of his embrace, the intensity in his gaze fixed upon you.

He nodded, his expression softening with concern. "I don't want to make you uncomfortable. I understand things might be tense with Remus, and I don’t want to make it harder for you."

"You know what I want?" Sirius tightened his embrace, prompting you to elaborate. "I want you to treat me like I’m yours, show everyone that we’re together. I couldn't care less about what anyone thinks." Both of you understood that anyone referred to Remus. Sirius remained silent, his gaze fixed on you, his expression indecipherable.

Your expression shifted to one of uncertainty, your brows furrowing slightly as you sought clarification. "We're together, right?" You asked, your voice tinged with a hint of vulnerability, searching his eyes for confirmation. 

Sirius's smile radiated such genuine warmth that a flutter of attraction danced in your stomach, “Yeah, baby. We’re together.” He couldn't fathom that he held you, his dream girl, in his arms, asking him if the two of you were together. It took him a moment to fully grasp the reality of the moment. 

He continued, “Don’t think that I’m not going to properly ask you to be mine, though, because I will. I promise.”

Unable to resist, you leaned in, capturing his lips with your own. Instantly, he responded, returning the kiss with equal fervor and intention.

With a reluctant sigh, you pulled away, your fingers lingering against his cheek as you whispered, "We need to get to breakfast."

"I think I can starve." Sirius shrugged nonchalantly, a mischievous glint dancing in his eyes as he leaned down to capture your lips once more.

You couldn't help but giggle, gently pushing him away, "Stop it, we gotta go. We’re going to be late." You insisted, a hint of laughter dancing in your voice as you playfully nudged him towards the door, the lingering taste of his kiss still tingling on your lips.

As you entered the common room, a wave of surprise washed over you at the sight of all your friends gathered, comfortably sprawled across the couches and armchairs. You slowed to a stop, catching Sirius off guard as he turned to follow your gaze, his eyes widening in surprise as they landed on the familiar faces of your friends.

"We wanted to make sure you two were okay after last night," Lily paused, her gaze piercing as she shot a pointed glare at Remus, who visibly shrank into the couch cushions. He appeared exhausted as if he hadn't slept all night, and you couldn't help but notice Adeline's absence beside him. 

"But it looks like everything is good?" Lily continued, her voice hopeful as her eyes dropped down to where your hand intertwined with Sirius'.

"Everything's fine," you affirm, offering a soft smile as Sirius squeezes your hand reassuringly. "But I need to talk to you, Rem. Alone.” You add, your tone gentle yet firm, conveying the importance of the coming conversation.

Sirius is the first to break the tense silence, shifting slightly while the others remain rooted in place, their eyes flitting between Remus and you. The atmosphere feels charged with unease, and you can sense the weight of Lily's unspoken words lingering in the air, knowing full well she gave Remus a piece of her mind the moment you left last night.

Before he can move away, you pull him back, your hand gently tugging him closer as you press your lips to his. A surprised sound escapes him before his hands come up to hold your cheeks. Remus clenches his jaw, unable to watch as you both melt into each other. 

James lets out a low, appreciative whistle, and Lily suppresses a smile behind her hand. Peter and Dorcas avert their gaze shyly while Marlene beams at the sight of Sirius melting into you. It's evident that they're all on Team Sirius.

As you both draw back, your gazes locked in mutual adoration, Sirius places another swift kiss on your lips. "I'll have your tea waiting for you," he promises softly.

A bright smile spreads across your face. "Thank you," you reply, your voice filled with warmth and gratitude.

As Sirius finally draws back, the others follow suit. James is already by his best friend's side, chatting animatedly. Lily and Marlene exchange knowing grins with you, silently promising a conversation later. Meanwhile, Peter and Dorcas trail behind, engaging in casual conversation as they meander along.

You sigh, bracing yourself for what promises to be an awkward conversation, and then take a seat beside Remus on the couch. The tension in the air is palpable, amplified by the near emptiness of the common room. Remus sits up straight, stealing a glance in your direction, his demeanor reflecting the unease of the moment.

“Are you okay?” Remus looks mildly surprised, that wasn’t the first thing he expected you to ask.

He clears his throat nervously, “Uh, I’ve been better, honestly. Are you?” 

He observes as you gracefully draw your legs onto the couch, tucking them underneath you. Finally, you meet his gaze, and he's momentarily taken aback by your beauty. A pang of regret hits him like a wave – he wishes he had confronted his feelings for you earlier. Perhaps then, it would have been him sharing kisses with you instead of watching you with his best mate.

"I'm good." Remus watches as you absentmindedly bring your fingers up to brush against your lips, a lovesick expression softening your features. You appear momentarily lost in thought, a dazed quality to your gaze. 

Clearing your throat, you shake off your thoughts, "But I'm disappointed about last night. What on hell was that?"

"Y/n," Remus's voice quivered with sincerity as he addressed you, his eyes reflecting the remorse weighing heavily upon him. "I'm so sorry. I never meant to upset you." He whispered, the words thick with sincerity.. 

You sighed, the weight of your frustration and disappointment lacing your tone, "And Adeline?" Remus looked startled. In the wake of you rushing to follow Sirius, Adeline had bravely broached the subject of his feelings towards you. Caught off guard, Remus found himself grappling for words, acutely aware of his friends' scrutinizing gazes, which bore a mixture of astonishment and disapproval. His hesitation was a silent confession to Adeline, who gathered her belongings swiftly, her departure punctuating the air with an unspoken disappointment. In the ensuing silence, Remus remained rooted, torn between pursuing you and granting you the space he sensed you needed. Regrettably, the thought of going after Adeline hadn't even crossed his mind amidst the dread sitting heavy in his stomach. Remus understood he had messed up, and the weight of his mistake hung heavy upon him.

“She left. I don’t blame her, I hurt her. Who gets a girlfriend when they have feelings for someone else?” A laugh escaped Remus, laden with incredulity. 

His words prompted you to avert your gaze, a subtle gesture betraying the unease settling in the pit of your stomach. The acknowledgment that his feelings for you still lingered left you with an odd feeling in the pit of your stomach.

Silence settles between you both, and it's excruciatingly awkward.

“I’m falling in love with Sirius,” You blurt out, nervously stealing a glance at him, eager to gauge his reaction. “I just, I need you to know that there’s no way anything could’ve happened between us. A couple months ago it would’ve been entirely different. But I was devastated, Rem. Do you know how hard it was for me to watch you be with Adeline? How much that hurt? And then you just admit you have feelings in front of everyone no less, like it wasn’t a big deal. In front of your girlfriend, who clearly cares so much about you. I don’t understand.”

"Dorcas asked—" He began, his voice sounded shaky.

"But you could've passed, or chosen to say another old crush's name!" Your interjection cut through the air, sharp and pointed.

"But there wasn't anyone else." He countered, his words tinged with a hint of desperation.

"Remus." His name hung in the air, heavy with frustration. You sent him with a glare heavy with irritation, and the intensity of your gaze churned a nauseating knot in his stomach.

"I was jealous, okay? To see Sirius hold you and kiss you like I have always wanted was awful. I couldn’t get you out of my head, and then Dorcas asked, and I just said your name."

"Godric, Rem!" You huffed, frustration coloring your tone. "If you had just told me months ago, we could’ve avoided this entire mess." Remus opened his mouth to speak, but you interjected, your words tumbling out with raw emotion. "But at the same time? I’m so grateful that you didn’t tell me, and that Sirius was there, because then I would’ve missed out on a guy who was never afraid to show me that I was his first choice.”

Remus remained silent, his gaze fixed intently on his intertwined fingers. You sat tense on the couch beside him, the air heavy with unresolved tension.

Remus’ eyes are filled with tears when he turns to you, “I know there’s no chance for us anymore, but Y/n, I don’t want to lose you as my best friend. Not having you around the last couple months have been hard. I miss you, and I understand if you’re not ready for that or don’t even want to be my friend. But Y/n, I will do anything to make this up to you.”

 You felt a lump form in your throat, a wave of emotions threatening to overwhelm you. With a harsh sigh, you turned to Remus, your gaze a mixture of hurt and determination.

"Our friendship won't be fixed right away," you admitted, the words weighted with the frustration that had been simmering beneath the surface. "I'm still frustrated with you." You confessed, your voice tinged with the raw honesty of your emotions.

“Y/n, I’ll do everything to make it up to you. I know everything won’t go back to the way it was, but I just want to be your friend.” His words carry genuine remorse, and you crack.

“Remus, come here.” You extended your arms toward him and Remus engulfs you in his embrace, his fervor nearly knocking you off balance.

You're both holding onto each other tightly, finding comfort in having each other back. A few tears escape your eyes, tracing silent paths down your cheeks as you find solace in the warmth of his embrace.

"I missed you too." You mumble softly into his chest, your words muffled by the fabric of his shirt.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

The familiar ease you once shared with Remus doesn't return immediately, but both of you are committed to rebuilding your friendship, to rediscovering that ease and comfort your relationship used to provide. But the effort that is being made means the world to you. 

And so it begins with catching up on reading together. You sit beside Remus on the plush couch, matching copies of a book cradled in your hands as you both immerse yourselves in its pages. Nearby, Marlene and Lily are nestled by the crackling fire, engaged in animated conversation about Marlene's impending decision to finally ask Dorcas out. Peter lounges lazily in an armchair, a contented smile playing on his lips as he indulges in chocolates, his attention drifting between the gossip and the flickering flames.

Sirius's laughter rings out, drawing your gaze toward him like a magnet. You shift your focus to the common room entrance, where Sirius and James have just arrived, their hair still damp from their post-practice showers.

You sit up straighter, a subtle movement, that draws Remus's attention to you. Following your gaze, Remus's eyes shift in the direction of Sirius, who is in the midst of a hearty laugh spurred on by James's joke. However, as Sirius turns and locks eyes with you, his laughter fades into a tender smile, his expression melting into one of affection and adoration. James catches sight of Lily across the room and wastes no time in making his way over to her, his trademark mischievous grin already in place.

"James!" Lily cries out, her voice a mixture of exasperation and amusement, as she dodges away from the curly-headed boy who is shaking his dripping wet hair over her. Marlene's laughter fills the air, and Dorcas grins from beside her. Despite Lily's attempts to escape, James encircles his arms around her waist, drawing her back against his chest, his satifsfied grin matching her infectious laughter. 

“I can’t stand you, James Potter.” Lily sighs, leaning back against James and shaking her head disapprovingly.

Sirius laughs, watching Lily pretend to be annoyed with James, before settling into the seat beside you, a comfortable familiarity enveloping the space between you. When he leans in to press a gentle kiss against your lips, you instinctively lean into his touch, savoring the warmth of his affection. Remus's gaze momentarily drifts away, a subtle pang of jealousy tugging at his chest as he watches the way you lean into his best mate.

In truth, Remus found himself uncertain of his standing with Sirius. Him and Remus were limited in their interactions lately, both boys feeling tense around the other. Unbeknownst to you, Remus flinched involuntarily every time Sirius drew near to you, displaying his lingering feelings for you. Sirius, though not proud of it, found himself grappling with a twinge of possessiveness whenever Remus was close to you. 

Sirius pulled back slightly, a warm smile gracing his features as he met your gaze, "Hi, m'love." He murmured softly, his voice laced with affection and tenderness.

You couldn't help but return his grin, feeling a rush of warmth at his endearing greeting, "Hi." You replied, your voice filled with warmth and fondness, mirroring the affection reflected in his eyes.

"What are you doing tomorrow?" Sirius's voice broke the silence, his arm casually draping around your shoulder, drawing you into his side. Your book lay forgotten as his presence captivated your attention.

"Just some studying." You replied, the thought of books and lectures suddenly fading into insignificance.

Sirius leaned in closer, his lips grazing against your ear as he whispered, "I wanna take you somewhere tomorrow." The words stirred memories of a few months ago when you were seated on this very couch with him, grappling with the heartache of trying to move on from Remus.

"Will this be a date?" You asked, unable to contain the excitement bubbling in your voice.

"Yes, angel." Sirius replied, his words soft and tender as he pressed a gentle kiss to your temple. A radiant grin spread across your face as you reached for your book once more, the anticipation of the upcoming date dancing in your thoughts.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

Almost a week slips by before you and Sirius manage to carve out time for a long-awaited date. As Sirius leads you on a walk, your heart swells with emotion when you realize he's taking you to the tulip field. Despite the lingering chill in the air, the sight of the vibrant flowers and the sun's gentle rays reflecting off Black Lake fills you with warmth.

"You're such a romantic." You giggle, leaning into Sirius even more. He responds with a bashful smile, his cheeks tinged pink. You're not sure if it's from the cold or your teasing.

"I didn't know if it would be a good place for a date or not." He admits, his cheeks coloring with embarrassment. He had spent the last week agonizing over where to take you. When he ranted to Peter about it, Peter simply shrugged and suggested Hogsmeade. Sirius had scoffed, his tone teasing yet earnest, telling him he better step it up if he wanted to impress a girl.

"Sirius, this is the cutest spot for a date. Plus, it has meaning to us." You tell him sincerely, and Sirius feels his heart flutter at the term us. He wonders if he'll ever get over the fact that he has his dream girl in his arms, looking at him the same way he looks at you.

As you draw closer, the perfumed air carries the unmistakable scent of spring, and the gentle buzzing of bumblebees near the flowers fills your ears. The sounds evoke a sense of nostalgia, transporting you back to your childhood days spent playing in the garden.

"Merlin, I was so stressed about it. I've never planned a date before. I mean, I've gone on dates, but I've never felt this determined to impress someone as much as I have with you," he sighs as if releasing all of his pent-up stress. "I even asked Peter where I should take you."

"Did you? Well, I think this is perfect." You grin, withdrawing your hand from his to lay out the blanket. The thought of crushing tulips under the blanket makes you cringe, so you search for a barren patch to place it over. With care, you shake out the blanket, letting it flutter gracefully before plopping onto it.

Leaning back on your palms, you watch Sirius, who remains standing where you left him, your copy of Pride and Prejudice in his hands. A soft smile graces his lips as he gazes at you as if you're everything he's ever dreamed of.

"Are you going to join me or just stare?" You question, patting the spot next to you invitingly.

"I quite like staring at you." He grins, sending you his famous smile. 

He sits down next to you before laying back and allowing the sun to settle on his skin. The warmth of the rays feels comforting, especially after the last couple of days filled with rain. The melodic songs of birds in the surrounding trees and the sound of your gentle movements create a soothing ambiance, putting him at ease.

You shift, settling onto your back, your eyes tracing the patterns of the soft clouds as they leisurely drift across the vast expanse of the sky. The birds' playful chirps and flutters among the trees add to the serene atmosphere. Sirius follows suit, adjusting his position to face you. As he watches you, he's captivated by the delicate play of sunlight on your features, accentuated by the colorful tulips that bloom around you, adding a vibrant backdrop to the tranquil scene.

He can hardly believe that he's lying next to the girl of his dreams, the one he's thought of for years, yearning for even a moment of her attention. Memories flood back countless times when he watched you with Remus from afar, consumed by jealousy for the time Remus got to spend with you. He would have given anything for just a few minutes alone with you to share a moment that belonged solely to the two of you.

"I talked to Remus earlier today." You remark, his nose crinkling slightly with an involuntary pang of jealousy at the mention of his friend's name. It's become almost instinctual by now. 

"He apologized to Adeline," You start, your expression thoughtful. "He mentioned it started off rough, but in the end, she forgave him, and they wished each other the best."

He hums, “That’s good.”

You giggle, “That’s all?”

Sirius hums softly, propping himself up on his elbow as he gazes down at you. "I'm glad they've found that closure," he murmurs, his tone laced with a hint of distraction.

Feeling his unwavering focus, you gently divert your attention from the sky to meet his gaze. His eyes are locked onto yours with such intensity that it causes a flutter in your chest, leaving your breath caught in your throat. 

He lifts his hands, delicately brushing his thumb against your bottom lip. A small, involuntary sound escapes you, and Sirius responds with a devastating smile, a hint of playfulness dancing in his eyes.

"I don't want to talk about anyone else but us." He whispers, his voice filled with sincerity. His gaze softens as his fingers trace gently across your cheeks, his hand coming to rest on your face, his thumb tenderly brushing against your jawline.

"What about us in particular?" You inquire, the words escaping in a breathless whisper. Your heart quickens its pace, a rhythmic drumming echoing the intensity of the moment, a sensation that always accompanies Sirius's proximity. The air feels charged with anticipation, every nerve tingling with the electricity of his presence.

"I can't get enough of you," he confesses, leaning in to press a soft kiss against your cheek. "How you never leave my mind," he adds, tenderly planting a kiss on your other cheek.

"How you make my heart flip every time I look at you." His lips brush against your forehead before he leans down to rest his against yours. Your eyes flutter closed at his proximity, your body nearly buzzing from the giddiness and anticipation coursing through your veins.

"How my heart is entirely yours." His voice trembles slightly, revealing the depth of his emotions as he utters those heartfelt words, “And that I am hopelessly in love with you.”

Your eyes widen, catching his apprehensive gaze, his nerves evident as he awaits your reaction to his confession Without hesitation, you thread your fingers through his hair and gently pull him down to you, closing the distance between your lips and his in a sweet, affirming kiss.

Sirius lets out a moan, his thumb continuing to brush over your cheek as he deepens the kiss. The warmth of his lips against yours is accompanied by a gentle exploration, each movement conveying a depth of emotion and desire that leaves you breathless. The air is charged with an electric intensity, and in that moment, it feels like time stands still, allowing you to savor the overwhelming connection and longing between you.

You pull away just slightly, your voice trembling with emotion as you gaze into his eyes. In the hushed intimacy of the moment, surrounded by the soft rustle of leaves and the distant chirping of birds, you utter those three profound words, "I am so in love with you. "

Sirius lets out a disbelieving laugh, his smile widening as euphoria bubbles within him. Without hesitation, he leans in, his lips meeting yours in a fervent and intense kiss that elicits a desperate moan from your lips. You've never experienced a kiss like this before, filled with such raw passion that it feels like every nerve in your body is set ablaze as if you could melt into him right there and then.

"Please be mine." Sirius pleads, his voice laced with longing and vulnerability against your lips. 

A tender smile graces your lips as you respond, your voice soft and filled with affection, "I'm already yours."

While nestled in the field of tulips, Sirius confesses to you that the very first tulip he gifted you was, in fact, a declaration of his love.

#sirius black x reader #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black imagine #sirius black x y/n #sirius black #sirius black blurb #sirius black fluff #sirius black x you #sirius black au #sirius black one shot #sirius orion black #sirius black x fem!reader #marauders era #marauders x reader #marauders #the marauders #the marauders era #marauders fanfiction #marauders fic #marauders fluff #sirius black angst #sirius black fic #sirius black x female reader

[caamboys]

Future Spouse

i hope you guys like this reading <3 plsss give me feedback !! and more recommendations !! taking requests <333

pick a pile

PILE ONE

channeled song

" wish you were sober " - conan gray

" save me til the party is over, kiss me in the seat of your rover, real sweet but I wish you were sober "

THEIR PERSONALITY -

the emperor, six of swords, six of pentacles, justice, the well

This is a very dominant , overprotective person. They have a powerful aura and seem very strong minded and authoritative. People know not to fuck with this individual. This is the type to defend you against anybody, who would literally fight for your honor. I see a very masculine individual with a very no bullshit attitude. I think this person has experienced karma firsthand so they take it very seriously. I feel like your future spouse has abandoned bad habits and vices and transformed the way they live for the better. They've had a bit of a toxic past they've outgrown and integrated into their journey. I wouldn't be surprised if your significant other broke some hearts. I see them abandoning their old habits after facing karma and retribution. This is someone who believes in change and growth and will encourage it in you as well. I see them in a stern yet gentle energy to encourage you to live better, eat better or become healthier. They're veryyy charitable, and most people would not realize this because of how intimidating they are. They're actually very giving and compassionate to others. I think something about them is intimidating and strong & that presents them differently than who they truthfully are. I believe this is a new person, someone you haven't met yet.

HOW THEY TREAT YOU

channeled song - " flawless by Beyoncé"

king of pentacles, judgement

Remember how I said they'd encourage you to be better?? This person is also going to raise your self confidence majorly. I see them constantly praising you, hyping you up and complimenting you. They love to praise your physical appearance, and go out out of their way to raise your spirits around them. They want to see you elevate and will do anything to make sure you do. With the king of pentacles, they're gonna spend A LOT of money on you 😘 I'm getting gift-giving and words of affirmation as their love languages. This is a financially abundant person, & I see them wanting to provide for you financially to prove themselves to you, to show you they can take care of you.

PILE TWO

channeled song

" NASA " ariana grande

" you know I'ma Star, space, I'ma need space, "

PERSONALITY

the star, the well, nine of wands, the magician, the emperor, eight of swords, ace of wands, six of pentacles, three of pentacles

I think this is a very popular extroverted individual. They're very well-known. I see a lot of people admiring your future spouse and putting them on pedestals. Your person may be very gifted either physically or with a certain skill. With the Magician and the Star card I see them being magnetic, and constantly praised. Lots of people favor this person. I get the sense that they're in a natural position of power. Despite this they work very well with others and don't mind collaboration. They go out of their way to empower others.

HOW THEY TREAT YOU

"high priestess, four of swords, the empress"

Channeled song - "Good life by G-easy ft Kehlani"

" We put the good in the good life, we put the bad in the past now we alright "

I think this person knows how to read your body language, expression and moods very well. They're very intuitive and wise when it comes to the way you're feeling. They learn this specifically to cater to you. I see a feminine energy here being taken care of and nurtured. They're very emotionally intune with you. I think their love language is slowing down their fast-paced lives to simply rest and relax with you. Quality time is definitely one of their love languages along with praise. With the 'Empress' here I see them thinking of you highly, someone they would be blessed to be with. They think you both are powerful and will go together well. If you're shy, they will inspire you to step into a powerful and confident energy. I see them reminding you of how highly they think of you and how well you go together. They will encourage you to be more comfortable being in the spotlight. You will be a power couple here with the 'Emperor & Empress'. I see you two stepping on necks.

PILE THREE

channeled song - blow my brains out by tikkle me

" sometimes I wish I could lend you my voice, lend you my heart, lend you my choice"

" lucky is she, who lives unaware. unlucky me knows way too much "

THEIR PERSONALITY

seven of wands, seven of pentacles, the sun, five of swords, two of pentacles, the chariot, judgement temperance, seven of swords, knight of wands

I think something about your future spouse triggers people's insecurities. They have a certain way of living that shines light on darker traits and habits in others. I see people causing strife and problems with your spouse because of their light. I'm seeing this person has been betrayed by people close to them because of this. They can be defensive with new people and who they share their path with. Their defensiveness with others can be a little bit immature and overbearing but I think they know when to balance themselves out. They give strong Scorpio vibes tbh. I see them being a natural born protector and fighter. They have an inner warrior inside of them. I'm seeing your person has fought a lot to get where they are, and they don't plan on stopping anytime soon.

How they treat you?

" Industry Baby " Lil Nas X ft Jack Harlow

" you was never really rooting for me anyways"

"I don't clear up rumors, where's y'all's sense of humor? "

the hermit, three of pentacles, temperance, queen of pentacles, nine of swords, knight of pentacles, king of sworfs

I see them being very ambitious in showing their love to you. They may come across as very intense but truly they crave partnership. I think from the start they will pursue you strongly. I know I mentioned them being overly defensive earlier but when it comes to you this person has extremeeee patience. You're the only person to tame this person's inner warrior. They'll bow to no one except for you. I see them wanting to stay inside and watch movies, talk and overall withdrawal from everyone expect each other. People will wonder how you managed to 'tame the beast'. This person wants a divine collaboration to grow a new life together. I'm seeing something about living together and possibly combining finances. This person may want you to stop working completely and take on any financial burdens in the relationship. I'm seeing them sacrifice anything for this relationship, to make sure they're offering you the best they possibly can. They're very confident and assured of their approach in love, sometimes even arrogant.

PILE FOUR

Six of cups, Five of Pentacles, The devil, The star, The lovers, King of cups

channeled song - "if I could I would feel like nothing"

I'm so sick of being tired, I'm so tired of being sick."

THEIR PERSONALITY

I see your person has been through some sort of turmoil in regards to family issues. I think this has caused a detached and dissatisfied energy with things outside of them. I think they battle things like depression, and the word insomnia just came through. I think because your person is very physically attractive and magnetic, people overlook their pain a lot. They may struggle being vulnerable because of that but I feel like the people attracted to this pile could be the opposite. I see the universe divinely orchestrating this connection for their healing. With the lovers card being here, I think they deeply crave emotional availability and to be truly in harmony with their own emotions. This might be someone you met already, I get a strong sense of childhood nostalgia with this person.

HOW THEY TREAT YOU

the sun, seven of pentacles, the hanged man, the well, strength, queen of pentacles

I see them abandoning and sacrificing parts of themselves that do not serve your relationship. I see them working incredibly hard to make your relationship happy and healthy. I think this person suppresses their depression around you, I'm seeing them specifically shine a light on all their best traits, showing off the best parts of themselves hoping it will be enough to compensate for their shadow side. Aww pile four I see them working to be emotionally balanced in this relationship. Aside from that I think their love language is acts of service. I see them being very productive in your relationship, cooking, cleaning, doing simple yet thoughtful tasks for you. I think you motivate them to work harder because I see them wanting to fulfill you financially. To take care of all your wants and needs. I see them taking you down a new journey with them, a journey filled with harmony, divine union and emotional vulnerability. The way they treat you transforms as your relationship continues to grow and blossom.

Thanks for reading 🩷🩷 I love feedback !!! <33

- C

#fs pac #crush pac #pac #pac reading #crush tarot #love tarot reading #tarot love #tarot #pick a pile #pick a picture #crush pick a card #future spouse reading #future spouse tarot #pac fs

[galene-gothic]

𝖶𝗁𝗒 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖿𝗎𝗍𝗎𝗋𝖾 𝗌𝗉𝗈𝗎𝗌𝖾 𝖿𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗂𝗇 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗒 𝖺𝖼𝗍 𝖺𝖿𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗂𝗋 𝖿𝖾𝖾𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌?

୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊ I hope this reading found you in good health, every reblog is appreciated and thank you for everything :) ˖♡ ˎˊ˗ ꒰ 🐇 ꒱

˗ˏˋ༻ʚ♡︎ɞ༺ˎˊ˗             PAID SERVICES

⸼ ۫ ︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 1 ꒱

So, they'll be a workaholic. As independent as they'll be, they'll also be alone and kind of isolated. They'll be really guarded to date romantically which will naturally lead to them being commitment phobic. They won't be the most spiritual person, they'll be someone who'll be more grounded in reality at that time (not really to be honest, they'll be ungrounded and disconnected but will be trying to be realistic and logical). They'll be burying away their feelings and past traumas but after meeting you, they'll start gaining clarity on their fears. You'll cause them to be really confused because of their feelings for you. They won't express any of this to you at that time but they'll rationalise everything internally and feel a sense of gratitude is what I'm getting. You'll make them feel consumed, it's like when the both of you will be together, they'll feel a high but there's still some anxiety there. I feel like there'll be a lot of things left unsaid, some missed communication between the both of you and you might go through a temporary separation. About why they'll fall in love with you, there are many reasons but the main one is just how they'll feel towards you.

They'll feel like they were really mean to you and the way they'll feel towards you will just be out of control. They'll feel like even the way they acted towards you was not very controlled. This is funny, they'll fall in love with you but will be mean to you before the seperation occurs, however, you're not going to be innocent either. Your intentions seem to be innocent but because of how they'll make you feel and because of how they seem commitment phobic (they might make it clear to you that they do not have space for you in their life to be honest 😭). You'll also be cold towards them, at some point, you'll tell them something like you don't really care about what's going on in their life or something (it won't sound as mean but it'll definitely be saddening). You'll be in a very unstable place before the seperation occurs but you'll still have high expectations and standards (probably because lowering your standards earlier got you nowhere). The both of you seem to be really different from each other, maybe even opposites but there'll be something that just attracts you to each other, you'll be equally as repulsed by each other though. There's something about feelings growing very fast here, the connection has such a slow yet fast energy.

When you'll first meet them, you'll seem hyperactive in certain ways but will still have a body language and facial expressions that hint lack of energy. You might meet in an environment where you'll have to take up certain responsibilities but you'll seem too naive and playful to get things done 💀. There'll be times when you'll have small temper tantrums. There'll be some petty arguments, playful banters and drama (to be honest, it seems to be a major theme in your dynamic). There's something about you being really emotional and kind of lacking maturity. You'll teach them a lot of life lessons. After your separation ends, you'll show up as someone with a lot of integrity. I just heard "there's something called 'cause and effect'". You're going to show up as someone pretty honest too, especially with what you want in life and think that you deserve. You'll be on the right path when you'll meet them after the separation. There'll be something about you though, before your seperation they might have thought that you'd probably wait for them because they seem to have come across as a respectful person but that image will just shatter after they meet you again.

I wouldn't be surprised if you're mean to them though. You'll very much be in a 'should I stay or should I go?' energy before or after you'll meet again. You're going to be more focused on the long term so you might choose to let go of them. They'll kind of realise their feelings before your seperation occurs and after the realisation , they'll actually be in a deep reflection period. They'll come off as someone very mysterious and secretive to you. I feel like they'll just hold it close to their chest and might choose working on other things instead. They will give in to their pride and withdraw. They'll just give up, this makes me so emotional to be honest. It'll be difficult for them to control themself because their emotions will feel so raw so they'll feel like they need to get their control back by giving up instead. After you meet again after the seperation, they'll choose to be decisive. I feel like the both of you will look to the past and think about how far you've come. There'll be a sense of nostalgia that'll hit them as soon as they'll see you. I'm also getting that you'll have changed a lot, your core aspects will still be the same though. They'll choose to free themself and trust how things turn out. 'We don't talk anymore' by Selena Gomez and Charlie Puth is coming through here.

⸼ ۫ ︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 2 ꒱

They'll fall in love with you because they'll learn something new through and from you. If they're an introverted person (like low-key anti-social), they could still enjoy being outdoors or around people if it's with you. People don't choose to be loyal, they either feel it or they don't and they will feel loyalty towards you. There's something about them seeing your potential and also helping them see their own potential. You'll make them feel really happy. There's something about wisdom coming through. This seems to be the classic case of 'real recognises real'. You'll feel safe around each other. 4th house and 5th house synastry seems to be significant here (could be composite too though). You will probably be mirroring each other a lot. You'll both meet each other after a very painful ending will have occurred in your lives. There's something about things just slipping through the fingers. A lot of things left unsaid, fear coming in, pushing each other away, etc. They'll fall in love with you because they'll see you as someone who's diligent and determined. They'll fall in love with you because you'll be self sufficient and independent, you'll also help them become the same way.

You'll feel like the calm after the storm to them, however, due to them not being used to the calmness, they will restrict their true feelings and character to a certain extent. They'll end up acting out of character and will be angry at you 💀. Their energy will be scattered and they'll act sort of arrogant. They'll show you unlimited potential though :(. You'll help them feel really confident so they'll naturally act confident too. There'll be times when they'll act really carefree and fun. The love between the both of you holds a certain innocence to it. They will be commitment phobic and end up expressing it in one way or another though. They'll make you feel special and you'll have a lot of fun together but they will give themself away by saying somethings that will make you feel like they aren't serious about you or you don't mean as much to them. Much like the first pile, there seems to be a separation here too. They'll be so different from most people that you'll have met but they'll not seem to be in the energy for anything serious with you which will definitely be hurtful. When they'll realise that what they feel towards you is actually love, they'll jump in and out.

The romance between the both of you (the first time) will be ungrounded and fast paced but also short lived. Even though the relationship doesn't seem to progress, spiritually the both of you will get so intimate because you'll affect each other really deeply. They will use their energy in wrong ways and will be restricting everything. They'll act really hasty, supposing they are ignoring you, it'll be in a haste. They'll end up acting like a heartbreaker and will leave you confused. They'll act really moody so you won't know how to act with them or where you stand with them. At the end, you'll feel like maybe you didn't mean as much to them as you thought you did. This is so sad, oh my god. You'll feel like they didn't care enough about you. They'll just act very selfish, I won't lie. They'll be non-committal and things will be messed up between the both of you. I don't know what will happen but the both of you will meet again, maybe they'll reach out to you. I'm certainly getting some sort of communication here. You'll both be grateful to each other and you in particular will have developed down to earth character. When they'll reach out, you'll not be the most receptive.

You'll probably have an argument or a discussion that's leaning towards you not being open to their offer. You'll tell them something like "things have ended already" or "it's better if we end things here". You'll even say something like "we're incompatible, it's not going to work". You'll have developed a strong identity by that point and will choose to come forward with self integrity. You'll be really forward with them and will try to talk to them in a mature manner. They will choose to come in slower, the energy that I'm getting is that they'll be feeling quite scattered too because you'll make it pretty clear that you don't want anything to do with them. They'll choose to give you time while still having times when they just feel torn and cold. They'll really want control over the situation again. They'll start expressing love to you through their actions rather than their words and will suggest that even if you're not lovers, you should remain as friends. They'll be generous and genuine. They'll just have good intentions for the both of you. They'll express gratitude to you very often. Due to the gratitude, it might be a bit difficult for them to let you go? Eventually, you'll give in and choose to trust them.

⸼ ۫ ︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 3 ꒱

I love this because the last two piles felt draining 😭. They'll be in a calm and emotionally healthy energy when you'll meet them. They'll be caring and tolerant at that time. They'll be emotionally mature and let's just say that they'll be a good person. They'll be considerate of others but still difficult to sway morally. They'll be rising above their problems and will have learned a lot from their past. They'll be positive as they'll know that they've gotten over the worst already. They'll either have developed or will be developing good communication skills. They'll be in a place where they'll want to be honest and communicative. They'll have gained a lot of clarity on a lot of different things and will be having realisations that will be leading to breakthroughs. They'll be pretty mentally stable and will be resilient, even if their life isn't going particularly good, it'll not be going extremely bad especially because of their mindset. They'll be feeling like they can battle anything that life throws at them, they'll be feeling proud of themself too. They'll have a vision for themself and their future. Their imagination will be running wild but in the best way possible. They'll fall in love with you because of how much potential the you seem to have. They'll see your potential and I feel like you'll have a lot of unused potential?

You'll somehow still be very confident though and will be self focused. You seem like the type to be like "wow, I'm so pretty, I must've saved a country in my past life to be born with a face like this" while looking at the mirror, eyes full of admiration for your own beauty. You'll have arguments but somehow it'll lead to revelations and you'll balance each other out despite how different or incompatible you are. You'll let them take the dominant role and they'll feel like they can assert themself with you. You'll hype them up and make them feel like you're proud of them. You'll make them feel like you see them for who they are and see their integrity? They'll feel like they're in the spotlight for you and you see them. They'll feel possessive over you and will want to have you. They'll feel such a tenderness towards you, they'll feel like they just want to keep you in their life. They'll feel protective of you and just adore you so much. You'll also help them feel more confident, they'll not be able to get enough of you, they'll just want more. After realising their feelings, they'll choose to trust you. They'll be more alert, pay attention to you and interact more with you. They'll listen to the things that you say and remember them so that they can make you feel special and touched. This is wholesome. They'll try to be more seen by you, they'll want you to take them seriously.

They'll try to talk to you about things and teach you a lot. They'll also try to get relationship advice from those they really trust. They'll try to create a valuable connection with you. You'll prove to be really helpful to them, you'll help them focus more on their work, they'll just feel really motivated to do better because of you. Even if it's just slow and small improvements, they'll implement those in their own life and also in the relationship between the both of you. Just being around you is going to feel so healing to them. They'll start being even more kind to themself and understand their past mistakes. They'll forgive and accept themself and the way things turned out to be. They'll actually choose to come forth to you with a strategy that is actually logical. They'll still be hopeful though. You'll either ignore the signs that they throw in here and there or you'll just be oblivious to them. Even you'll be working on some stuff within yourself so well you'll be critical of yourself and just everything. You might have been kinda guarded to them because of your own issues but you'll finally choose to be open to communicating with them. At first you'll withdraw from them to sort out your feelings but will make a firm decision after that. You'll let go of your fears to be with them because you'll love them. After you choose them, you'll also find new purposes in life. This is truly beautiful. The direction will be chosen and set for the both of you. I'm happy for you, take care.

#intuitive readings #pick a card #pick a deck #pac reading #pac #astro notes #astrology #pick a photo #pick a picture #pick a gif #astrovations #astro observations

[aceofpatience]

🌟Your Next Significant One -> Pick-a-Pile reading🌟

I'm looking into both your and their energy, your first impressions of each other as well as the relationship itself.🤍 It's VERY specific. And kina long. Heh.💀 Tell if anything resonated! Take a deep breath, meditate and dive right into your reading! Shall we SEA?🐚

PILE 1 -> Lapis lazuli

Energy of pile 1: Hurricane. You managed win despite everything. You overcome any difficulties thanks to your own inner strength and healing energy. I’m thinking that others may have given up on you or at least didn’t truly believe that you would succeed on your own. They might have show support but only after you won in this situation, did they feel actual respect for you. You are or you soon will be in the position of power. You have the ability to help others, but your biggest strength is how you can soothe yourself in any circumstances. It’s like you have your own inner healer/therapist, ha.

Energy of your person: You knew they were the one the moment you saw them. It’s like you’re connected by some spiritual link. There is no other option for you. You will just know. They may be hurting even if they don’t acknowledge that - it’s like they’re constantly in a hurry, always busy with something. A bit of a workaholic maybe? I think they might not even know what exactly they are lacking in life, so that’s why they are always chasing (after another win). Somebody hurt them in the past (I’m getting the vibe of a childhood friend), yet they still decide to put their trust in people. So loyal. And very down to earth. They are rational - there is a lot of on their mind all the time. Also they may have a loud inner child, who needs some attention.

Who are they -> Work/study/responsibilities: I think it’s something sport-related. For sure it’s providing them with some public recognition or prestige. More so than the material gains, it brings them satisfaction. They want to show the world how strong and capable they are. Sometimes it’s like they are their own harshest critic, aiming to prove themselves to the world.

Goals: They want to show their victory was the result of their own hard work, not just a fluke. They wish for a sense of security that they cannot really find in their work/study-related environment - it’s like they cannot rest, they must keep fighting all over again in order to prove something, maybe their own capability or resilience.

Looks: Ravenclaw vibe. People might see them as a bit of a robot, but they just prefer to keep their distance from others. Strong features (nose, chin, jaw, cheek bones), yet very subtle facial expressions at the same time. It might be difficult to decipher what they’re thinking based on their body language. Their hands are important - maybe you will pay special attention to them. Rigid figure, always keeping their back straight (I’m feeling that what’s they were taught to do in youth). They have this natural pride about them (seen also in their posture), that some might mistake for arrogance, but it’s just them and how they carry themself.

Meeting -> Your POV: "Another love". You may meet them at a time when somebody extends an offer to you, some kind of helping hand. This will result in you gaining new independence (either financial or outside of your parents’ influence). It will be a time of new prosperity and abundance for you.

Their POV: They are ready to give their heart to you right away. You will meet at a moment, when they are discovering that their previous relationship (platonic or romantic) was kind of toxic - definitely not serving them, it doesn’t seem like they got any support in it. Now they want to move on, even if their heart is still healing. But what I can say for sure is that, it quickly becomes yours.

Romance -> How you see them: At first a bit like a sad robot (but a sexy one lol). They seem intimidating, closed off, cold and calculating; you might be a bit hesitant to talk to them. They appear to be very strict (maybe it will happen in a work environment or sth official). Because of how quickly you will feel this attraction and the feeling of vulnerability it brings, you will be afraid of them hurting you. However it’s certain there won’t be any problems in the „professional” sphere - you may make a good team. Only you can see through their armor, and discover the hidden warmth and a kind of a childlike innocence to them. This unseen side of them is what is intuitively pulling you towards them, in spite of other people’s reservations about this connection. But their true feelings are obvious, you see them beyond the walls that they’ve build.

How they see you: They like a moth that is enchanted by your light. Your harmony and  stability (and for some also self-confidence). You for sure don’t pretend who you are, and they love it. You’re kindred spirits - you are the definition of a family for them.

Relationship -> White bull (it might be your symbol idk). Also the number 3. The Cupid arrow. Your feelings are evolving quickly, there is no control over them. You change their worldview - and maybe they change yours. Since the first conversation it’s over - you know they are the one for you and vice versa. The strength of you bond might frighten you for a minute, but it will eventually lead you to your greatest victory. You both are perfectly balanced together and I think your inner children will understand each other greatly (trauma bonding hue hue). And one of you will be great at dirty talk or just super smooth.

PILE 2 -> Green Aventurine

Energy of pile 2: You are trying to find yourselves - either by trying out new hobbies and activities or by constantly seeking change. You are mastering your abilities, honing them to perfection. You might have a lot of different talents, and I have a feeling that no matter what you touch it somehow always ends in success. You lucky bastards heh. For some of you - you might have left your family house behind or cut contact with your relatives, but I’m feeling you will eventually reconnect with them. You give off strong fire and air placement energy. Or those signs might be important to you in some way.

Energy of your person: Consciously or not, they feel responsible for others. This constantly evolving energy of yours is what’s really alluring to them. They themself have a sort of fluid energy, experiencing transformations of their own. But despite all that, they are quite stable and somebody that people can rely on. All their changes might be mostly superficial, like changing up their appearance or style from time to time. They might have a tendency to mirror those around them, but inside they remain the same. Grounded, Earth placement energy. Also BIG romantic vibes off of them, but I will elaborate on this later. For some of you, you might have known them before, but haven’t thought of this person in years before this meeting. And all the memories attached to them suddenly resurfaced.

Who are they -> Work/education: Rather stable line of work, that has a lot to do with them sitting by the desk. It’s a routine, but a rather pleasing one. They work or study alone, maybe sth with a computer. It might not be something they dreamed of spending a majority of their time doing, but it keeps the „money” coming lol. It’s just something that they recognize as a normal responsibility for themself. They can’t really see any other options, so for now it’s the most suitable alternative for them.

Goals: They wish to have more time for themselves, so that they could finally focus on all the small everyday pleasures - ones that usually had to stay in the background. They  truly yearn for a true romantic love, but deep inside they might fear they will never find it.

Looks: Really pretty/handsome overall. They take good care of themselves, both in term of health and looks. So they may have a daily skin-care routine. PEARLS. This is either an important symbol for them, or it can mean that they like to wear jewelry, have some significant tattoos or wear makeup? I feel they might often change their appearance, for example by dying their hair or mixing up their outfits. For some of you, and take it as it resonates, they might wear a green scarf or some other piece of clothing in that clothing lol. And their shoulders are hot.

Meeting -> Your POV: „Devil Doesn’t Bargain". A lot is going to be happening in your life at the moment  of your meeting. You may have just ended a relationship of your own but idk. You are trying to get out of some situation you don’t like. It’s not even necessary a bad or a difficult situation, but one that you intuitively feel isn’t right for you (work/love/study idk). For some of you it might entail some sort of sacrifice, that you may „use” people around you to get your way? But it sounds more dire than it will actually be lol. I also see that during this transition period, you again will be perfecting some skill. You chose to leave behind that former stagnant situation, and on your way out you completely destroyed the status quo. Maybe it was some kind of a group project, that might have ended in conflict. Bottom line is, you will be pretty occupied with all that „drama”, you won’t really be looking for any romance at the moment. So at first, you won’t recognize THAT person as someone significant to you.

Their POV: „Cardigan”!! They will be lonely. Very much so, but out of their own choosing - they are waiting for love, for the right person. Maybe it will be work that brings you two together, teamwork maybe? Or you both will be leaving your studies/job environments at a similar time when you meet.

Romance -> How you see them: At first you might see them as a rival, a competition to your authority in the group. I have a feeling you like to be in the centre, therefore this person stealing your spotlight might unconsciously trigger you. You may have seen some quality in them, that you yourself wished you had. But this irritation will last only for a short moment. You will quickly realize that you both can benefit out of having a good professional relationship with each other and them quickly discover that you actually make a good team. Then comes the chemistry of course, and the rest you can probably figure out, heh.

How they see you: Instant attraction, they feel something pulling them towards you. It like they recognize an old friend in you, someone familiar. They admire you, seriously. There are no slimy intentions on their part, they genuinely respect your position in the group, as well as YOU yourself. They are givers, they just wish to show you how devoted they are to you. And they might commit quite quickly to this relationship. Before they were looking for a place to belong and with you they finally feel like they found it. Seriously, they are really sweet. They are putting your connection first and foremost. They are probably not very vocal about that, but the feelings are very much real and intense xd.

Relationship -> 22. Intimacy. At first you might be hiding that you two are a couple, so maybe some workplace romance?I also feel that before making things „official” you two might fantasize about each other a LOT. But you will get together pretty quickly. The attraction and sexual tension is HIGHH. I feel that you guys might change up who the „dominant” party is often, as in interchanging who leads the other. You will encourage and inspire each other equally, true power couple vibes (world domination!!). When one of you experiences change, the other is able to keep up with them. Some of your friends might view your relationship as slightly „toxic” or „codependent”, but it’s only because you are stronger and more powerful together than you are by yourselves. You both have this kind of wildness in your hearts, full of ambition and hunger - one that you acknowledge, accept and love about each other.

PILE 3 -> Tiger Eye

Energy of pile 3: Hats. You have ambition and energy that is hard to focus or direct in one particular way. You are a family person, I think you might have a lot of relatives - and you can rely on them. For some of you, I see some kind of heritage coming into your surroundings. It looks like your life is put together pretty well, you have things that occupy your time(your work/studies/passion projects) and you seem to always expect quite a lot form yourselves. You may be feeling overworked, but there is still something bright and joyful about your energy. There might be something charming about your attitude, that makes people enjoy being in your presence. I have a strong feeling that you got some  really special quirks (for some of you, I repeat: collecting hats!), but people around you might perceive it as something cute or funny. (Little they know how deep your weirdness goes). I’m getting the earth and fire energy (Aries or Sagittarius). Othala rune.

Energy of your person: It’s giving strong female vibes - the energy of creation, fluidity - you can never tell what is underneath. Artistic soul (music or sketching, but signing also may be significant here). I’m getting an Ophelia vibe - but without all the tragedy lol. They have a lot of possibilities before them. They are true dreamers and heave a strong, spiritual personality. They might seem less organized than you, they don’t really do plans, but still - everything is going smoothly for them.  It’s like someone is watching over their chaotic asses lol. The energy of cats - your person is  a very independent and unconventional creature, that’s why others may either love or hate them. For some of you: the sakura blossom flower may be their signature scent or symbol (a tattoo probably?). Algiz and laguz rune.

Who are they -> Work/study/anything more official: „Go your own way”. I think they are starting a new project or something like that. And they know they will succeed - their confidence may be slightly excessive given the situation, but still. They’re right. They are just great. Maybe singing is their hobby and something they’re pursuing.

Goals: They would like to be more rational, more down to earth (I think it’s something they are always repeating as their new year resolutions, while holding their new journal or calendar. Spoiler: it never works out, heh).

Looks: Longer hair, strong eyebrows. Something about them seems untamed and wild - for example hair, pointy ears or longer canines). Powerful, enchanting voice or laugh. For some of you: icy shades of hair or, on the contrary, burning fire red.

Meeting -> Your POV: You might find yourself in the situation in which your hobby, quirks will be in the foreground (…The second-hand shop with hats?? Just thing about it…) When you get to meet your person, you will be far from home, your family and friends - new town, moving houses or simply a vacation? It will be your me-time, for sure. You both will meet either by some dating app or your mutual colleagues will set you up for some kind of a blind date. I feel you will have many options in the realm of dating, and your person will be one of them - but from the very second you know them, everyone else will fade in comparison.

Their POV: „Sky Full Of Songs”. They didn’t look for a relationship (like I said, they don’t often do planning of any kind and just go with the flow). But the moment they meet you, they will just have to know you and „win” you. Claim you. (And one of you will give the other sunflowers). Your first (blind?) date will be just perfect. You don’t have to fear there being any awkwardness or uncomfortable silence. You will just get along. A lot of talking, laughing and shared heated glances - that’s what I see for you, pile numer 3. Falling in love.

Romance -> How you will see them: You will see a confident, strong, ethereal person. Beautiful in unconventional way - seductive like a nymph or some demigod. But there won’t be anything intimidating about them, you will connect easily. They just have this inner warmth, which you will adore. They will be funny and full of life (energy of a bubbly sunshine, I would say). You two won’t be able to stop talking. You will be attracted so much to their natural way of being.

How they see you: They will find your strength irresistible. It’s like you are the shoulder they can rest on their head on. A very sexy shoulder. Hah. You give them a sense of security and a safe space - they know you would never judge them. They won’t waste any time and will give you their heart in no time. Also they intuitively notice all the „wounded” parts of you that you keep hidden from most, and will love and cherish them. I think they are going to admire your more strict and rational side of personality. (Yes, big sir energy lol). And your quirks? They’re gonna see them as important and will love them as much as you do.

Relationship -> Everything just great, nothing to add. Your energies are made for each other. Communication is your shit, you rule at this. The chemistry? Wow, dude. High af.

#tarot #tarot reading #tarot witch #tarot cards #love reading #relationship #intuitive #romance #crystals #pick a pile #pick a picture #pick a card #love

[bratbby333]

even if it hurts

fushiguro megumi x fem!reader ‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ angst, kinda toxic, college au, 21+ warnings: language, alcohol consumption summary: unrequited love word count: 3.2k

“I just don’t understand what she sees in that guy,” Megumi thinks to himself. He watches you as you exit the library from his vantage point, seated by the window. You walk toward your boyfriend, who’s leaning up against his car. Megumi’s chest gets tighter the longer he watches you, wincing as your boyfriend pulls you in close, your lips connecting with his for way longer than Megumi can handle. 

“It should be me,” he sighs within, eventually turning away from the window, bringing his attention back to Yuuji and Kugisaki, the two of them oblivious to his mental anguish. But, of course they are, and so are you, his unchanging, neutral facial expression never giving away his true, tortured feelings. 

Then again, Megumi doesn’t know what you’d see in him, either. He knows everything about you; the good, the bad and the ugly, caring deeply for your well-being and happiness, but that doesn’t outweigh the negatives that come along with him. His lack of empathy, his overly analytical nature, his disdain for small talk, the permanent frown on his face. He hopes one day you take a chance after all these years and accept him in the same way he already accepts you; flawed, but so beautiful. 

“Aren’t they just so cute together,” Kugisaki gushes out, before looking to her friends for input. Yuuji smiles wide, nodding in agreement.

“They seem very happy together. I’m glad she’s finally found someone.” Yuuji adds, before looking back at his notes. Megumi glances outside again, observing that you’re now seated in the passenger seat. He stays quiet, which isn’t unusual for him. Neither of his friends bat an eye at his lack of commentary, chalking it up to Megumi being typical Megumi. He wishes he could rejoice on your behalf, to congratulate you on your new found romance without stifling a gag. Even if he could fake his way through it, his words would be coated in jealousy. Instead, he continues to retreat within. You’d see right through his bleak attempts to be supportive, anyway. So he packs his feelings up in a box, stowing them away on a forgotten shelf deep in the darkest corners of his mind.

Within his tormented psyche, Megumi is anything but his normal self. Looking down at his textbook again, he can’t comprehend a single thing in front of him. He stares longingly into the book, willing himself to read, but his mind can’t help but always find its way back to you. One of his best friends. Your cheery disposition contradicts his cold, closed-off demeanor. The way your perfume lingers on his shirt after a friendly hug, how your body feels pressing against his. The way your lips curl before you laugh, how you wrinkle your nose after someone tells a joke, or the soft smiles you always send his way. How your eyes gleam with excitement when you see him (well, not just him, but your friends, collectively). You’re everything he isn’t, and everything he wishes he was. You make his normally frigid skin run warm, feverish even.

He knows it will never be you and him. Like the sun and moon; coexisting, but never coming together, a constant, cruel cycle. You two meet briefly in the same sky, before you disappear under the horizon and his world goes dark. That part doesn’t hurt nearly as much as what the actual outcome is: You will always be in his life, just out of reach; so close yet so infuriatingly far. He will always be an outsider looking in; a friend. It’s a tortuous realization. But the moon cannot glow without the sun. So he wills himself to stay put. To watch you fall in and out of love, over and over again; listening to you rave or rant about your relationship, he inevitably being a voice of reason for you when you need advice, even if it burns his throat when his supportive words leave his mouth; and it will never be him. And he accepts that as the painful reality he’s condemned to live in. Purgatory. It would hurt much less if he wasn’t as close to you; if you were just a friend of a friend, or even strangers; an unknown face, a passing daydream. Someone easier to lose. 

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾

You press your hands against the metal bar of the library doors, sighing as you push against them. The setting sun dances across your hair, the warmth kissing your skin. You smile softly at your boyfriend, who always insists on picking you up after class. He pulls you into him, his lips meeting yours. Pulling away, you smile up at him before taking a step back, allowing him to open up the passenger side door for you. You turn your head back toward the library before getting in, looking through the window at the table you were just sitting at with your three best friends. Your eyes linger on Megumi, whose attention is back on his textbook. 

“I wish he was you, Meg.” You think to yourself, looking at the ground before sitting in the passenger seat. You’re quiet on the drive back to your boyfriend's apartment, thoughts utterly consumed by Megumi. But you know it will never be him. You’re too talkative, too excitable. Too different from him. With the two of you being such close friends, by the time you realized how your heart ached for him, it was too late. You don’t want to ruin what you have. You can’t confess. That would make the dynamic shift towards awkwardness and tension, possibly even destroying the friendships you cherish so deeply. So you stay quiet. You date other people in hopes that someone can replace him. But your attempts are all in vain. No one can replace Megumi. He knows everything about you, appreciates you for everything you are and accepts you for everything you’re not. But you know the deeper connection that you desire will never be reciprocated. He does all these things for me because we’re best friends, you rationalize.

You reconcile with the silver lining of it all; enjoying the time you’re able to spend with him, relishing in the jokes between you two, cherishing the glances you steal when you know he's not paying attention. You ignore the gnawing deep within you, the hunger for more. You cling to the way his smooth voice delivers eloquently thought out sentences to your yearning ears, the way your heart leaps when his deep blue eyes gaze attentively into yours. At least you can hold on to the notion that he will always be in your life, at the very least, as a friend.

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾

You can’t settle for meaningless connections. You’ve decided that you’ll take Megumi however you can get him, the cards dealt to you leaning in favor of just being friends. And that’s okay. You’ll hold on to the hope that one day he’ll take the risk. Such a selfish desire, you acknowledge that. You refuse to fight these feelings any longer, the stark realization that it will never not be him coming to fruition on that fateful car ride, which is why you’re at your boyfriend’s house, sitting across from him, attempting to explain that it isn’t him, it’s you.

“I’m sorry,” you start. You can’t seem to find the right words that will soften the blow. Your mind is an endless sea of thoughts, a similar deep blue that you find in Megumi's eyes. Oh, his eyes. One thing at a time. 

“You did everything right, I promise. I just think we’re looking for different things.” You don’t have much more to say, tuning out your now ex boyfriend’s pleas and questions as you stand and walk towards the door, not uttering another word. Your movements shift to being calculated and emotionless; maybe you are more like Megumi than you thought. You take a deep breath once outside, pulling your phone out and dialing Kugisaki. 

“Hey, what’s up? Aren’t you supposed to be with your boyfriend?” she asks. She can hear the whizzing of cars in the background of the phone call. You walk along a busy freeway with no destination in mind. But your body knows where it wants to be; with Megumi. Your heart drives you with such conviction that you’re nearly running now.

“I was, yeah, I just broke up with him. Can we go out for drinks? Ask Yuu and Meg, too.” You reply. Nobara pauses, waiting for more information before realizing you weren’t interested in sharing. Your tone was emotionless and commandeering; very out of character for you. She decides not to pry. After a moment of silence, you hear the soft murmur of voices echo through the speaker of your phone, before she returns to the call, the plan being set to meet at a local bar just outside the campus at 6pm. 

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾

The study session is interrupted by an incoming call to Nobara’s phone. Megumi’s heart soars at the sight of your name on the screen. Kugisaki smiles before answering, but her twinkling demeanor drops almost immediately. He hears her ask a couple questions, but he can’t comprehend what was said over the loud roar of blood rushing through his ears. He doesn’t understand how you elicit such unusual responses from him. These feelings are getting harder and harder for him to fight. He snaps back to reality when Kugisaki relays that you want to grab drinks tonight. He’d do anything and go anywhere for you, jumping on the chance to be around you. Keep your composure, they can’t know. Megumi stoically agrees to the plans, as does Yuuji. The call ends a moment later.

“I did not see that coming,” Kugisaki sighs, placing her phone back down on the table. Megumi looks to his friend, anxiously anticipating her debrief of the conversation she just had. The possibility that you were hurt made Megumi want to jump out of his skin, to console you in a deeper, more intimate way that friends probably shouldn’t do. Kugisaki’s vagueness of the whole situation was making his nerves run cold. 

“It’s not unusual for her to want to grab some drinks…did something happen?” Yuuji asks, concern painted across his normally cheerful face. Kugisaki just glances between the two boys, her brow furrowed. Megumi’s blood is ice in his veins when Nobara finally tells them. He tunes out his friends, his mind inundating with possibilities, sending a silent prayer to the heavens that you’ll soon take a chance on him. He kicks himself for thinking that way, guilt soon replacing his desperation. How dare he attempt to take advantage of your pain for his own pleasure. What kind of man has he become? 

You want nothing more than to run into Megumi’s arms, to hold his face in your hands. You can’t help but feel sinful for what you’ve done. But being with someone when you crave someone else’s touch goes against everything you believe. Inauthenticity. It’s causing you more harm than good. You can’t stand it anymore. 

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾

“Are you okay? I’m so sorry it didn’t work out…just earlier today we were talking about how happy you two seemed together. Can’t help but think we jinxed it,” Yuuji apologizes as he crashes into you, his arms constricting you tightly. Such a sweet boy. He holds you there for a moment, rocking you back and forth, before breaking away, Kugisaki taking his place. 

“His loss, you’ll forget about him soon enough. Let’s get drunk. Maybe you’ll find someone new while we’re here!” Nobara smirks. Megumi can’t help but cringe at that suggestion, the thought of seeing you engaged with yet another man, a man that isn’t him, shoots a lead bullet through his chest. He reaches his boiling point. He can’t patch up his wounds anymore. 

Megumi approaches you last, placing a firm hand on your shoulder, patting gently and saying nothing. Pretty on brand for Megumi’s way of showing comfort, but there’s something different behind his eyes; a new, unknown feeling that you can sense while looking up at him. You fight every urge in your body telling you to ask about it, to pry deeper into his mind, knowing he wouldn’t tell you, anyway. You desperately want to lean into his touch, electricity shooting through your body. You smile gently at his unreadable expression before the four of you head inside. 

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾

Seated at a table away from the bar, the four of you talk about the upcoming exams. You set plans for your next study session. Yuuji invites the group to a movie premier on Saturday night. Everyone reluctantly agrees, even though the premise of the film sounds dreadful. As the night goes on, the drinks keep coming, and you and your friends are properly buzzed, giggling and joking around. Everyone except Megumi, only offering the occasional smile and quiet chuckle. Everytime he laughs, your heart beats faster. Unbeknownst to the group, he’s clenching his fists and gritting his teeth, fighting every urge to spill his deepest, darkest secret. 

Your eyes trace lines along his face, taking in every curve and angle of his disposition. Something is bothering him. Your stare is burning holes into his side profile, and he shifts his weight in search of relief from your intensity. The sun and her rays. You’re snapped out of your trance as Yuuji stands from the table, pointing his finger in Nobara’s direction. 

“Nobara Kugisaki, I challenge you to a Skee-Ball tournament!” he shouts. The abruptness of his actions shocks the three of you. You glance at Kugisaki, who’s smirking at Yuuji. 

“You are so on.”

The two abandon the table, trash talking one another on their way to the machine, leaving you and Megumi alone. You feel elated at the time you get to spend one on one with him. He feels differently.

“It was for the best, he seemed like an ass anyway,” Megumi huffs out, avoiding your gaze as he takes another sip of his drink. His comment catches you off guard, but it leaps from his mouth before he can give it a second thought, as if he had been waiting the entire night to say that to you, only feeling confident enough to do so with the liquor in his system and the listening ears now on the opposite end of the bar. 

“Well, no, he was perfectly nice, Meg,” you retort, confusion painted across your face. This is so unlike Megumi, the man of few words.

“So why dump him if he was so nice? There must be a reason,” he challenges. Megumi has moved from denial, to bargaining, to anger in the span of a day. He can’t help but lash out. He’s bursting at the seams. Being near you is no longer enough, and his ego is his last line of defense before you fully break his heart without even meaning to. The constant torment he’s felt since meeting you has slowly been chipping away at him. All he knows is that he’s had enough. If you leave, if he pushes hard enough, he won’t hurt anymore. He will no longer have a constant reminder of what could be. He will finally reach acceptance. 

The hostility of his words bruise you, anger plastered across his face. Why is he upset with me? I did this for him, not that he’d ever know that. You brush off the sting from his comment. You’re just happy to hear him speak. You’d do anything to listen to him express whatever thought popped in his head, hanging on every word that leaves his lips, even if they send shards of glass into your heart. It aches so beautifully. You can’t muster up the courage to tell him that he’s the reason it didn’t work out. You’re exhausted from trying to force connections with other people in hopes that they could replace him, the constant back and forth leaving your life in ruins. You cut ties with perfectly good people because you know they will never be Megumi. So you cling to anything you can get from him, even if it destroys you.

“I…I don’t know, Meg. I think I’m searching for something else,” you reply quietly, your response insinuating much more than you intended. Your words float through the air so inaudibly that they are nearly drowned out by the music pouring out of the bar’s speakers. But Megumi hears you. He always does. His head snaps to face you, meeting your gaze. He feels his blood pressure spike. Is she referring to me? No…that can’t be what she means. She’s just feeling vulnerable right now. He maintains eye contact with you, looking past your eyes and searching deep within your soul, hoping something in there will guide him towards the answers he so hopelessly needs.

Your breath catches in your throat. Why is he looking at me like that? Did I make it too obvious? Did I ruin everything? Megumi’s eyes dart around your face, searching for something, anything, that would alleviate his pain. It doesn’t matter what you meant by that statement. He can’t stand this anymore, teetering on the edge of insanity. If I can’t have her, and I can’t stand keeping her around without torturing myself, then… fuck it. He decides to jump.

He grabs your face with both hands before crashing his lips into yours, a muffled yelp escaping you. Your eyes go wide, your body freezes. Time slows to an insufferable pace. You can’t comprehend a single thing, a part of you trying to convince yourself that this isn’t real; if it’s nothing more than a drunken kiss. But it’s real. It’s everything and more. You close your eyes, surrendering to this moment. You move your lips against his, desperate to savor him. He feels the exact way you imagined him to, the taste of him clouding your senses. You can’t get enough. The two of you fit together perfectly. You are utterly and completely consumed by him.

His heart races as he feels you reciprocate. His hands run up and down your body with urgency, trying to make up for years of wasted time. The loud bar fades to black as he pulls you deeper into him. All he can feel is you; you’re all that matters, that has mattered. Your hands meet his cheeks, moving to thread themselves in his hair at the nape of his neck. He groans into your mouth, his tongue battling against yours. You claw at one another hungrily. After years of starving, you are finally satiated. Every doubt that clouded your mind is cast to the wayside. All the pain and suffering has come to an end. The outcome that you both desired comes to fruition. 

“Fucking FINALLY!” You break away from one another, the sound of Kugisaki’s voice bringing you back to reality. She's standing before you two with her hands on her hips, head cocked to the side. Yuuji is positioned beside her, grinning from ear to ear. Megumi takes your face in his hands again, pulling you close.

“Fucking finally,” he whispers. 

author notes: if this seemed very unhinged and scatterbrained it's bc it most definitely was..and i tried to write this is in a specific way so that it bounced back and forth and contradicted one another and...u get it. im sure u do.

anywho, thank u so much for engaging with my stories...every like, comment, and reblog makes my little heart soar xx

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#jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen writing #jujutsu kaisen x reader #fushiguro megumi #jjk fanfic #jjk megumi #megumi x reader #megumi fushiguro #bratbby333

[demonicchicken1121]

Alastor, Rosie, and Cannibal Town: an Analysis (I’m fucking at it (Alastor Posting) again)

Ok I know that a lot of people have already been talking about this, but I really want to analyze Alastors behavior in cannibal town and how it’s so much different than how he behaves literally anywhere else.

Alastors true motives, personality, opinions, etc are widely debated in the fandom. Does he actually care about Charlie or the hotel? What’s his beef with Lucifer? Why did he make a deal and who was it with? Al is such a mysterious and closed off character, and his demeanor changes so frequently that no one in or out of universe really knows much about him. I personally think that the closest we get to seeing Alastor in his truest and most authentic self is when he’s in cannibal town.

From the moment they arrive, Alastors demeanor changes dramatically, even from a few moments before, when Charlie was venting about her relationship issues. He seems genuinely excited to be there and see Rosie, to the point where he seems to forget he brought Charlie here for a reason (hell I think he forgets Charlie is even there at a few points.)

Al and Rosie HAVE seen each other since he returned to hell, at the overlord meeting, but they didn’t really have the time to interact. Even so, they are so in tune with each other. This man was gone for seven years and here they are gaslight gatekeep girlbossing like nothing happened.

But once they actually have the opportunity to interact outside of the overlord meeting they’re super excited to catch up. The only other time he shows this much enthusiasm to see someone is with Mimzy, but things quickly goes south when she puts the hotel is danger. Alastors friendship with mimzy feels very onesided, and it seems that she only shows up when she needs something. While Alastor and Rosie clearly ask each other for favors, it feels a lot more equal in a way where they each get an equal amount of benefit.

And while we haven’t seen much of them yet, I get the vibe that they hang out in their free time and respect each others boundaries and schedules. I think Al went through cannibal town hoping to see her in the prequel comic, but figured she was busy after the extermination and instead asked some of the residents to say hello on his behalf. But that’s just a theory, a gam-

Also just a little thing I noticed, when rosie is joking about Charlie being too young for Alastor, Charlie looks visibly annoyed, but Alastors body language and expression don’t change. He tends to react relatively strongly when anyone (Angel) makes a move on him or assumes he’s dating anyone, but I think he knows Rosie well enough to know she’s joking.

Alastor lets his guard down so much in this part of the episode. He’s really in his element and his behavior seems so natural and genuine.

I love how he’s so willing to just roast Susan. Every iconic duo has that one person they fucking hate and will not be subtle about how much they fucking hate them. It’s especially funny with alastor, who’s usually really pretentious and passive aggressive when he insults someone, but with Susan it’s just

“✨Ornery old bitch?✨” also this is the only time in the entire series that alastor swears in a genuinely humorous way. In almost every other example, he is trying to intimidate someone or piss them off, and also when his staff was broken.

And speaking of his staff, I think it was actually a big deal that Alastor let Charlie use it, even tho it was for a very short time. This does show that whether or not he actually cares about her, Alastor does have a certain amount of trust and respect for Charlie. Despite that, I don’t think he would have done this if he wasn’t in cannibal town and with Rosie. The staff is clearly very important to him and likely holds some amount of his power, given how he reacted when it was broken.

As weird as this sentence is out of context, I think Alastor feels very safe in cannibal down. Rosie and probably the other cannibals genuinely like and respect him. it speaks volumes that not only he let Charlie use his staff, but he put himself in the position that would leave him vulnerable to Rosie if Charlie were to turn on him. While he knows it’s highly unlikely that would happen, I think it’s still worth noting that he intentionally left himself in such a vulnerable position in cannibal town and nowhere else.

Something else interesting I noticed, is that “ready for this” is one of the only songs that Alastor is interacting with another character, and isn’t competing for the spotlight. He is walking all over Vox in “stayed gone”, and getting walked all over by Lucifer in “Hells greatest dad”, but here, he’s very in tune with everyone else. He and Rosie are on equal footing and he feels secure enough to fade into the background a bit, harmonizing with the cannibals and letting Charlie take the lead.

So yeah, I feel like Cannibal town is alastors home in hell. His relationship with Rosie is probably the most positive relationship he has in the whole show. I think viv has mentioned that Alastor wasn’t a cannibal before he died, and I’m not sure if that’s still canon, but if it is, I can definitely see him becoming a cannibal when he became friends with Rosie. I can also see Rosie being one of his first friends in hell, maybe they even rose to power together. I’m clearly getting into some more speculative headcanons because I do what I want, but I’m putting them in their own section.

Now for headcanons with little to no substantial evidence ✨✨✨

I do actually really like the idea that they became friends very quickly and rose to power together. I like the idea that they were friends before Alastor became this super powerful force in hell. It also makes sense that he would trust someone who wanted to be his friend back when people weren’t constantly asking for favors or testing his power. Bc I do think that there was a short period of time between him arriving in hell and rising to power. (I have a lot of ideas about how he got his powers which probably will get its own post, but to brief, he wasn’t super powerful when he arrived in hell.) it makes sense that him and Rosie would have become friends in that period.

When he did start rising to power, I think Rosie would have guided him, given that he was a relatively new sinner. She would help him find overlords to target, possibly even letting him recruit cannibals to help him take them down. After he was finished broadcasting their screams, he would return their bodies to Rosie for her to sell. Maybe any cannibals who helped him would get discounts or first pickings.

This makes sense to me bc not only would it help explain why Alastor has never seen Rosie as a rival or a target, but also it would help explain why they’re so close. Nothing builds a friendship better than overthrowing incredible forces of power. Also they totally square dance on the weekends.

Viv please I need an episode that’s nothing but these two dicking around in cannibal town for twenty minutes.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel theory #hazbin hotel spoilers #hazbin hotel season 1 #hazbin spoilers #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #rosie hazbin hotel #radio demon #hello rosie #hazbin hotel rosie #long post

[cinnamoneve]

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐱𝐲𝐬𝐦.

paroxysm \ perəkˌsiz(ə)m \ (n.) - a sudden attack or violent expression of a particular emotion or activity.

❆ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: gojo satoru x gn!reader ❆ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: the first time you say 'i love you,' ❆ 𝐰𝐜: 2k ❆ 𝐚/𝐧: he is so annoying ♡

you’d known that you loved satoru from the day that you met him.

maybe it wasn’t as prominent as it was in your life now–but it was always latent, in the background, and something you secretly kept to yourself. you were almost afraid to admit it to your conscience. the louder it spoke at the back of your mind, the more you wanted to reach out and tell him: the more bashful you were.

satoru was forward about his love for you: there was never a moment in the relationship that you doubted it. satoru’s love language was all of them, and he did it well.

“honey, i was at the store and i thought of you. i got you this!”

“baby, the laundry’s all folded and put away”

“my love, you had such a long day today, i’m so proud of you, let’s cuddle up on the couch. i have your favorite wine,”

your personal favorite was the way he soaked up every scenario and moment with you with his trademark: “can we stay this way for a while?”

on the couch, eating ice cream together, buying the other person their favorite bottle of wine after a long day. satoru would never specify what “this way” was. was it a place? a feeling? maybe a fleeting moment in time. whatever it was, though, he wanted all of it for as long as he was around.

you’d always interpreted it as “in love.” satoru never called you by your name, only terms of endearment he’d handpick out for you based on the vibes. ‘honey, sweetie,’ when he was feeling especially soft and domestic, ‘baby’ when he was treating you like a delicate piece of glass, and ‘love’ when he was looking to spoil you with his presence and body.

he never said “in love,” though, or muttered the phrase outside of a pet name he would spill out like his own personal mantra. 

you were secure in the relationship, but there was always something at the back of your mind poking the unfortunate insecurities, wondering why he didn’t say anything yet.

would it be okay if you told him first? should it be a big deal?

he’s dramatic. it would probably be a big deal to him, you concluded. 

and so, the planning began. 

the ideas flooded your brain. maybe an intimate night together, or not any special occasion at all? the more you rehearsed it, the faker it sounded.

you settled on feeling it. something about knowing naturally and reading the mood in the moment was more intimate than an expensive dinner together or anything money could buy.

so you waited.

and it didn’t take long; in fact, it was the next morning. twelve hours after you made the declaration to tell your own boyfriend you were in love with him. 

it was over something mundane, frequent, but still sweet. your heart swelled a bit when satoru got up for the morning, kissing your cheek and repositioning the covers so you’d be underneath them still. you let him believe you were still asleep, not reacting when he rolled over to look at you or kissing him back when he planted his greeting on your cheek. 

still, your boyfriend moved as usual. you heard him softly walking through the apartment, socks carefully muffling the way he stomps in the morning when his feet haven’t woken up quite yet. the smell of coffee flooded the bedroom as well, knowing he was brewing a full pot instead of his usual, singular cup. 

he was waiting for you to get up, while carefully ensuring you slept as long as you needed. his movements around the house were quiet, but with intent. a quiet shuffle of pots, the fridge opening, closing, opening again, closing once more–satoru was making breakfast. quietly, quietly, quietly making breakfast.

you had a late night. you deserved the opportunity to sleep in. work’s been stressful, you seem to be coming down with something, and you only kissed him, like, fifty times yesterday. of course he’s going to assume the worst–it’s best to let you get your sleep so he can spoil you come morning.

and he did.

satoru came back to bed some thirty minutes later, warm cup of coffee and book in tow. even if you were asleep, he wanted to slide under the blanket to soak up some time with you any way he could, even if it was just existing in the same room together. 

you gave up your act to roll over and greet him.

“oh, good morning, sweetie,” he sleepily says. even after all his work this morning, he can’t hide the exhaustion in his voice when he reaches down to kiss your forehead.

“good morning, satoru,” you nod back. you think about closing your eyes again and letting him baby you a bit, but you decide against it.

he brushes your hair lightly out of your face, looking down from his book to admire you. it’s all he could do, really. anything forming in his brain to say couldn’t come out eloquently enough, so he opted for studying your face carefully while he traced your hairline with his thumb.

“stay put,” he quietly said, before dog-earring his book and getting out of bed once more.

in his absence, you flip over his book to read the synopsis to peek more into his mind. something philosophical, probably, but your eyes were too tired to keep up with the words on the back. 

satoru returns with another cup of coffee in his hand, matching the mug full of it on his bedside table.

“made fresh,” he says, smiling, “i put in that new creamer you bought, too,”

you give him a gentle kiss, lingering a little longer than usual, as you sit up to hold the coffee in your cold hands. the shade is perfect–you can already tell he’s added just the right amount of creamer.

the perfect amount of creamer in the bitter black coffee. something, something, to be loved is to be known. and satoru knew you like the back of his own hand.

“thank you,” you started, “i love you,”

it slipped out. it wasn’t anything like you imagined it would be. it wasn’t rehearsed, forced, or too soon. it was imperfect, and you felt your face get hot at the confession of your own feelings.

satoru looked down at you with an empathetic look, before reaching down again to kiss your forehead.

he sits back in bed next to you, getting under the covers, and resuming where he left off in his book.

“i have breakfast ready to go whenever you’re hungry,” 

and that’s all he said about it. nothing more, nothing less.

you knew he loved you, right? so why couldn’t he say it back?

the two of you sat in silence, drinking your coffee together as you woke up more. satoru read his book, and left to take a shower when he finished his drink. you ate breakfast together afterwards, talking about the day ahead and anything that came to mind.

there was no talk of the thing. the confession. could it even be called that?

god, this is kinda fucking embarrassing.

you pushed it from your mind and tried to continue on with your day. luckily, it was the weekend, so it was fairly relaxed. a few errands here and there, maybe throw a load or two in of laundry. satoru floated around the house doing his own thing as well. catching up on paperwork, working out, checking in on students, calling an old friend.

you felt yourself overthinking. it was a lot. luckily, the day goes by quickly when you’re keeping yourself busy.

“you down for wine and a movie tonight, sweetie?” 

satoru calls out from the kitchen, barely looking up from his laptop as his sweet voice echoes to the couch.

you’ve barely talked today, the thing leaving a sour taste in your mouth that you couldn’t help to be mad at him about. even though you know you shouldn’t be. he didn’t do anything wrong, after all.

“sure, honey, whatever you want,”

you hear a laptop slam in the other room and heavy feet coming towards you. before you know it, the lanky man tries to slither into your lap. 

“hmm, that doesn’t sound too enthusiastic,” he whines, “what’s going on?”

something, something, to be loved is to be known. and he loved you a lot, seemingly.

“well,” you started, feeling your face get hot and your eyes get wet, “i was a little shocked you didn’t answer me this morning,” 

satoru retreated from your lap to sit up straight next to you, listening intently. 

“not that you have to answer right away, i-i guess. i think i was just surprised, is all,” 

satoru reaches down to take your hand in his. 

“mhm, i understand,” 

and it stops there. you sit in silence for a bit. the two of you look down at the couch, or at the tv, not letting go of the other’s hand.

“do you not feel the same?”

satoru snapped his neck to look at you, quickly looking panicked before speaking again.

“no, no! that’s not it at all, i don’t want you to ever think i don’t feel like that about you,”

“then why won’t you say it?”

he takes a deep breath, sitting back on the couch while continuing to squeeze your hand. 

and mumbles.

“what, satoru?” 

“...”

you turn your whole body to hear him better, seeing his ever-pouting face looking into the distance.

“you totally stole my thunder,”

all you can do is look at him, barely processing what he said.

“what do you mean?” 

he pouts more, finally making eye contact with you.

“i wanted to do something totally romantic, sweeping you off your feet and catching you by surprise, or something. and then you do it over breakfast? i was totally blindsided,”

you feel like crying. not out of a sadness way, or even in a twisted-happiness-kinda-way. you weren’t really sure if you wanted to cry or strangle him, actually.

“it was over coffee, actually,”

“as if that makes a difference,”

“it totally does!”

“oh really?” he teases, “what about my coffee made you fall in love with me?”

even if he was teasing, you got a little shy. 

“it’s not like it was just that, stupid,”

“ooh, tell me more,” he squeezes your hand.

“no! you haven’t even said it back to me,”

he pauses and studies your face once more, before scooting towards you.

satoru reaches up, taking your cheeks in his hands and bringing you closer to him. pulling you into a soft kiss, you feel him smile against your lips as you reach to hold onto his forearms. 

“i love you too. i love you, i love you, i love you”

you giggle shyly, backing up from his face as his words made you bashful.

“you don’t have to say it that many times, stupid,”

he lets go of your face after planting one more kiss on your cheek.

“better get used to it, sweetheart”

all content © cinnamoneve 2024. do not repost, modify, steal, or copy without permission.

#gojo satoru #gojo satoru x reader #jjk x reader #satoru x reader #jjk #jjk fluff #★ jujutsu kaisen #gojou satoru x reader #satoru gojo #gojo fluff #gojo satoru fluff #jujutsu gojo #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jjk fanfic #satoru gojō x reader

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️ Ranking Richonne

#19: This Is Good (S6E15)

I mean...do I even need to explain? 😏 I always love this scene for its relaxed, happy, and intimate vibes and for really solidifying that all the romantic sexual tension Rick and Michonne had pre-canon would play out just as perfectly once they could finally act on it and be in love out loud. They do intimacy so well and naturally. The best word to describe this scene is straight-up sensual. And as they let themselves be fully immersed in their Richonne bubble in this scene, I truly believed what they believed - the world is theirs...

I didn’t realize how much opening minutes really used to be blessing us in this series. Cuz in 6.15 we get to see Rick and Michonne cuddled up again for the first time since their canon ep.

And I love that after seeing some couple-y moments with Glenn and Maggie and Abe and Sasha in this episode opener, we get this scene that reminds you there are some powerhouse newlyweds a part of this TWD couple list now. Won’t He do it! 😊 

The scene opens with Judith on the baby monitor, which lets you know this is the bedroom of her parents. Plus the baby monitor made an appearance in Rick and Michonne's 6.10 canon moment as well so it sorta connects the two scenes in a way. And their family truly feels so whole now that Rick and Michonne have embraced that they’re meant to be.

I adore the way they're wrapped up in each other, and Michonne’s smile, and the way Rick's kissing her shoulder and like being as close to her as possible. 😍 They just both seem so genuinely content. And even half asleep they can’t keep their hands off each other lol. When I tell you these two are magnets - all you have to do is watch their body language in this scene to know it’s true. 🧲

And then Michonne takes that apple and bites it, and I love the subtle expression Rick makes when she does that. And then this show said, if y'alls' glasses somehow ain't fogged up yet then let’s just keep serving steaminess and have Michonne feed Rick the apple lol. They're wild for putting this moment in, and I'm here for it. 😋

Just their breaths and laughs in this, I love that in this quiet moment, their love is so loud and clear. And the apple suggests two things - 1) Adam and Eve fall-of-man foreshadowing and 2) that they are the hottest couple in all of television. 🔥👌🏽

It’s additional perfection when she runs her hands through his hair, and he immediately goes back to wrapping her in his arms. Um every second of this scene is a blessing. 😍 And of course Rick kisses her again, and the way she rubs his hand that’s holding the apple...Cup runneth over, y’all. It’s so great how natural and comfortable they are to be like this so soon after making their feelings for each other known.

It really does go to show that now they get to do what they've always wanted to do.

Like this feels like a whole passionate morning routine already and the married vibes are immaculate. It confirms how the physical aspect of this relationship was truly the final piece of their already perfect union. They’re happy and fed, and so are we. 😌

And in Rick’s first dialogue of the scene he says the only fitting thing to say on a blissful morning like this. “This is good.” And Michonne agrees it is and notes how Jesus came through. And did. Won’t he do it. 🙌🏾

Rick is really confident saying, "They all did, and they’re going to keep coming through." Homeboy is feeling really hopeful and confident during this period of the show and part of it is def cuz he’s now officially in a relationship with the baddest chick in the game. IJS. 😌

Michonne mentions how Maggie wants her and Glenn to set up watchpoints and Rick is in that lovely 'take a break' mood so he tells her to 'stick around.'

I love that it’s such a common theme for Rick to always want to extend his time with her. I repeat - the world can always wait when Rick is with Michonne. 

It’s cute that part of his pitch for her to stick around is that 'Judith isn’t even up yet.' Mom and Dad, y’all. And then Rick really makes his pitch enticing when he starts kissing all over her and making her laugh. 😊

The way they can make each other smile and laugh like no other is the absolute best. (and Rick is more hungry for her than the apple ijs) I love that they’re so unabashed in expressing their love and desire for each other. And you know I’m always happy to see Rick and Michonne's playful side.

Like how great is it that we get to watch a couple that's so grown and mature while still having something youthfully energetic in their want for each other too. 🙌🏾

Michonne is disciplined like no other tho so she laughs and says, "wait no." Rick stops and looks at her asking, "yeah, why not?" in that fine voice and idk how Michonne remembered what she was saying with Rick over her like that lol. But, like I said, Sis is more disciplined than most so while her body language is certainly saying she'd love to stay in bed with him, she also wants to keep her commitment to Maggie and Glenn.

I love how she again runs her hands through Rick's hair while saying  Maggie has them on a schedule and she doesn’t want to piss off a pregnant lady. And then Rick’s subtle pout. Every cute choice was made in this scene, I’m telling you. 🥰

Also I was like Michonne, sis, this is your chance to enjoy yourself and maybe even be a pregnant lady too, Maggie will understand lol. Like tell me Maggie wouldn't be like...

But Rick understands and doesn’t want to piss Maggie off either lol so he playfully tells her to go. It’s cute the way he says, "not that pregnant lady," and Michonne says, "right." Always in agreement.😊

And as we know, mornings like this blissful s6 one with Rick will have Michonne also one day being a pregnant lady who's nothing to mess with in the future. 👌🏽

(Side note: I’ve noticed every time Rick and Michonne have a scene chatting in bed together, the one person who comes up each time is Maggie. This scene in 6.15, the bedroom scene in the Sanctuary in 9.01, and their gorgeous bedroom scene in their home in 9.03. Rick and Michonne express care for Maggie's well-being every time, which is part of why it's so unfortunate that Maggie’s relationship with Rick and Michonne ended with a falling out. And the fact that all we know is something vague occurred and somehow Maggie and Michonne grew distant after Rick was gone. It's sad cuz they were shown to mean a lot to each other but then ended on a sour note.)

Rick says go and Michonne laughs as she starts to get up, and Rick again looks so rested and satisfied eating his apple and laying in bed. Michonne be giving that man life, y’all. 😊

Michonne notes that Maggie is worried about an attack and again Rick is confident saying when they come for us, not even "if," but "when," they’ll be ready. He’s extra confident saying this won’t be like before, and "the world's ours, and we know how to take it."

It’s sweet that Rick again takes his time to really reassure Michonne. It’s like he can sense that Michonne too might be having some concern about the looming fight, and so he’s so gentle but certain when he tells her everything they need is inside these walls and they aren’t losing any of it again.

I love that Rick feels they have everything they need, and I know he and Michonne having each other is very much included in that for him. And you can’t fully see it, but you can tell he comfortingly places his hand on her, really wanting her to know, “we’re not losing any of it again.” 

And then I love how Rick says, "I’m not." Basically saying, trust me whatever is trying to take from us is going to have to go through me, and it won’t end well for them. And Michonne knows it too so I love the way she believes him and boosts him up saying, “No you’re not.”

She knows Rick is a fighter and a force to be reckoned with. It’s part of why she fell in love with him, and you can see that in this moment.

Also hearing Rick just eating the apple again lol, homeboy ain’t worried about no outside threats in this moment. He’s too busy on cloud nine. Having good fresh food, a strong community, a healthy family, and a goddess of a wife has Rick like...

And because she’s a fighter too, Michonne takes his hand and also says, "I’m not," cuz they’re cut from the same cloth, really and truly. And you just believe the two of them so much when they say this.

Even knowing Negan is coming, you just feel like ultimately he’ll be no match for Rick and Michonne because those two together are unstoppable. 💯

I love that they got this peaceful morning moment to just fully enjoy each other's presence and affirm to each other that what they have is good and not going anywhere. These at-home scenes always paint such a great picture of why Rick and Michonne make for the absolute best husband and wife.

And again, the sensuality of this whole scene is A1. In every inch of every frame. And I remember loving this scene back then but watching it back now it’s even more sensual and sweet than I remember. Like it’s so good from beginning to end and solidified that Rick and Michonne really do work perfectly as a couple. I love the way they talk to each other and so visibly want each other. I’ll say it 1000 times. 

Two more cute moments I just want to note in this 6.15 ep are Rick ratting out Michonne and low-key himself too, when he reveals to Morgan that Michonne did steal that protein bar back in King County. Like he thinks he's telling on Michonne but also Rick,...

Cuz Rick stayed letting the world know he remembers pretty much every detail about Michonne. 😋 I love that Rick remembers so much from his first run with Michonne in Clear and then Morgan’s smile like 'oh I know your girl took it.' Also, I just love any time Andy and Lennie get to act together. Legendary talents. 👏🏽

And then I really love the Rick and Abe scene towards the end of the ep too. It’s one of the most heartfelt exchanges between two men on the show imo, and I like how Abe was the tf member who always most wanted the Richonne tea. He’s one of us lol. 

It’s always heartwarming seeing Rick ask Abe specifically if Michonne is back yet. Like I’ve said before, some of Rick's Day Ones are out there, but of course, his wife is his utmost concern. And Abe is so compassionate when having to reveal that Michonne is still out there. It’s heartrending that Rick can’t even hide the concern he feels and wants Michonne back home. 

I appreciate that Abe seems to notice this and wants to talk about love when asking Rick if he’s scared to go back to it and let someone in close. We know from the "rules keep changing" scene that letting someone in is big for Rick. So he pauses for a moment and answers "yeah" twice.

Abe brings some levity saying how he’s basically ready to blaze a path of his own (with Sasha 😊💜) even despite this world's penchant for taking things away. And Rick’s amused face at Abe is cute.

Then the way Rick stays standing at the gate, almost wanting to will Michonne home. So sweet. 😭

And extra sweet is Abe kindly saying, "any second now" to reassure Rick while he’s in this state of feeling off because Michonne's not okay somewhere, so even from afar, Rick's not entirely okay right now either. 

Rick had been feeling so unshakeable all ep, but Michonne being out there while the looming threat of the Saviors is high shows that there are still things he worries about, and of course, Michonne and her safety are high on that list.

I love that despite the scary aspects of letting someone in, in that world especially, Rick and Michonne still dared to do so fully with one another. And because of it, they get to enjoy blissful mornings filled with love like this one here. It was giving newlyweds and married-for-years all at the same time, and I'm eternally here for it. 😌

#richonne #top 30 #number 19 #rick x michonne #twd 6.15 #reveling in richonne #twd towl #the ones who live

[jmliebert]

☆ when both Ominis and Sebastian have a crush on you☆ (you x ominis x sebastian)

continuation to my silly little thoughts about relationship with Ominis and Sebastian. You can read the first part here♡

☆

It’s unmistakable that both Ominis and Sebastian have feelings for you that go beyond mere friendship...

You can see it in Sebastian's eyes, dark and focused, in his shoulders, straightened and proud, in his little smiles and hearty laughter after you've done something utterly dangerous yet fun. You make him feel alive, he's been waiting for someone like you since forever it seems. Sebastian is eager to impress you, yearning to make you happy and to spend every second of his time in your company (because why not?) and the feeling is mutual. You feel adored, you feel alive, you feel wanted.

Ominis, on the other hand, is more reserved. He treads carefully, protecting his peace. However, as time passes, you notice him gradually opening up. During conversations, he surprises you with thoughtful and beautiful compliments that make your heart sink in your chest. He sees you like no one has before, attempting to truly understand you. Yet, as you observe his nervous gestures, you realize he's afraid of getting hurt in the end – and it pains your soul because you could never hurt him, not him.

Late at night, you find yourself torn. What if you want them both?

☆

Not much has changed in terms of the trio spending time together, but the dynamics have certainly shifted a bit here and there (hihi)

Sebastian openly expresses affection for both Ominis and you, ensuring neither feels neglected

Ominis remains observant and understanding, possessing a natural ability to notice subtle shifts in mood, body language, and all

Your favourite moments involve quietly reading books on the sofa, bodies softly touching, warm and cozy against the fireplace

Another cherished moment is laying on the grass, stargazing and talking, holding hands with them, silently thanking Merlin that it’s so dark – because if it weren’t you couldn’t hide your red cheeks

One time, Sebastian (of course it got to be him) got the idea to cook something in the kitchens. He took the lead, excited but clueless. Ominis, devastated, provided thoughtful commentary and pointed out everything Sebastian was doing wrong with this posh voice of his. Sebastian was angry but the atmosphere shifted when Ominis licked his finger covered in cream, silencing everything.

Sebastian, a free spirit, desires to kiss and touch you both whenever he pleases, while Ominis, cautious of social stigma within Hogwarts grounds is more like, “No, we can't do this.”

So you talk a lot about the future, eagerly anticipating living together in your own flat, continuing your studies, supporting each other, just being together and I love love love that

☆

When you have a chance to sleep together in one bed it’s the happiest time. Their bodies are hot against yours, their breaths tickle your skin and you feel safe and loved

You secretly adore watching as Ominis and Sebastian are playing with each other, kissing..touching.. you could stare at them like that for hours, they are truly beautiful

When they touch you, it’s like heaven, like there’s hundred hands on your body at once and it’s making you crazy

They tell you how beautiful you are, how they love your body, how they love you

Ominis is brushing a strand of hair behind your ear, Sebastian is kissing your wrist

time stops for a moment

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

you can find more of my works about sebastian and ominis ♡here♡

#hogwarts legacy #sebastian sallow #sebastian sallow x mc #hogwart legacy imagine #ominis imagine #ominis gaunt imagine #hogwarts legacy ominis #ominis x mc #sebastian x ominis #sebastian sallow x you #hogwart legacy headcanon #you x sebastian x ominis #sebastian sallow imagine

[forever-rogue]

Hi lovely, idk if you're still taking requests from Joel but in case you are, something with the prompt “If we’re both single next Halloween, you’re allowed to put a curse on me." perhaps?

Probably a little costume party in Jackson, whatever you want. Thank you <3

AN | Okay, but this is sweet, Halloween-y goodness💕

Pairing | Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings | Mild Language

Word Count | 2.1k

Masterlist | Joel, Main

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

One Year Ago

You spotted him standing near the door, seemingly camped out near the punch bowl with a cup in hand and an unreadable expression. You turned to May and Daisy, excusing yourself as you made your way over to him.

At first Joel didn't even look your way, pointedly keeping his gaze away from you and everyone else. You definitely weren't having that.

"Joel Miller," your voice was honey sweet as you stopped in front of him, a soft smile on your face. He seemed to stiffen for a moment before allowing himself to look at you, "are you just going to stand here all night and scowl at everything?"

"I am not scowling," he huffed, waving a hand as if to prove his point. You rocked back and forth on your heels and looked at him expectantly, "and I haven't just been standing here."

"Hmm…" you helped yourself to a fresh cup of punch and sipped on it slowly, "kinda seems like what you've been doing, honey."

Honey. He could have died and gone to heaven from how sweet your voice sounded. And yet you had no clue as to the effect you had on him.

"I'm just…I didn't really want to be here," he allowed himself to meet your eyes and instead of finding any sort of judgment, he found nothing but curiosity, "but, ugh, I kinda felt forced to be here. So."

"So," you teased gently, "let me guess, Tommy and Ellie?"

"Naturally," he sighed lightly as you giggled softly. It really might have been his favorite sound in the world. It was ridiculous how addicted he was to everything you did, "I realize I'm a downer…I was just getting ready to leave."

"You're not a downer," you put your hand on his forearm and gave him a gentle squeeze, "parties aren't for everyone. Honestly, I don't like them most of the time either but it's my favorite holiday so I couldn't say no."

"Halloween is your favorite holiday?" He quirked a brow at that as you nodded eagerly, "tell me why I am not surprised in the slightest."

"It is very predictable, isn't it?" You gestured to your body - you had gone all out with your witch costume. You looked insanely good but somehow he doubted that you knew that - which was ludicrous by the way. He swallowed thickly as he tried to keep his mind from going directly into the gutter, "have I bewitched you?"

Joel couldn't hold back his snort of amusement as you beamed at him. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to think of a good comeback. Unfortunately he found none and ended up blurring out, "pretty! You look pretty."

"Oh," your entire face flushed with warmth as you bit your lip and looked away for a moment, "what are you supposed to be? Weird guy at a party?"

"Something like that," he was dressed in regular clothes. Just because Ellie made him come didn't mean he was going to dress up.

"Well, whatever you want to call it, you still look handsome," you weren't sure what possessed you to be so bold but you just had to throw it out, "you're a catch, Miller. Even if no one else sees it. Don't even know how you're still single."

"Alright, alright," his cheeks tinged a pretty shade of pink as you nudged him with your elbow, "you can calm down and don't need to flatter me."

"It's not flattery if it's true-"

"Well then, what's your excuse for still being single?"

"I dunno," you tapped your lip thoughtfully, confidence and excitement flooding your veins, "maybe the right one just hasn't shown up yet. Or they're...afraid. who knows."

"How about this little witch," he tapped the edge of your hat, "if we're both still single next Halloween, you can put a curse on me."

"Is that a promise?" You asked as he nodded. You held up your pinkie and gave him a thoughtful look, "better make it a pinkie promise so we know it's real."

"You've got yourself a deal," he hooked his finger around yours, the two of you grinning at each other like fools, "and we'll see what happened next Halloween."

"You're on, Miller. So on."

Next Halloween couldn't come fast enough.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Present Day

The past year has gone by in a blur. It was hard to believe that Halloween had already happened a year ago. It was even harder to believe that Joel was still single…to your knowledge anyway. You were going to be confirming that soon enough.

The two of you were good friends and often spent time together but the past few months had felt…different. You weren't sure quite how to put it into words but it was different - different but good. You thought he might have been flirting with you but it was hard to tell, Joel was a tough nut to crack after all, and you didn't want to be presumptuous either. Imagining how foolish you would have looked if you made a move on him and he didn't feel the same way was enough to put the idea out of your head. 

Instead you were set on enjoying his company and let things happen as happened. But then you remembered - it was Halloween. A whole year since you'd made your little bet with Joel. Which meant…something was going to change between the two of you. One way or another, you knew that something was going to happen.  

You were planning on going over to Joel's house to see what he was up to, but he definitely beat you to the punch. It came in the form of loud, rhythmic knocking on your front door. It was with a huff as you ran down the stairs, half in your costume. 

"Hello?" You were breathless when you answered the door, still deciding on if you were going to chastise whoever was it was or welcome them into your home.

"Hi," and there stood Joel Miller, smug little smile on his face and arms crossed over his chest. The man was dressed as a cowboy and for some reason that was doing something for you.

"Joel," his name was breathy off your lips as you tried not to stare at him too intently. You knew that man could read you like a book, "what are you doing here?"

"Came to see my favorite little witch," he looked you up and down, amused by your current state of dress - or lack thereof. Your entire face felt like it was on fire as you shifted to attempt to cover up your top half. You were only in a bra with a sheer layer on top, "wanted to see if you needed any help with anything."

"I, ugh, umm…sure?" You weren't sure what you needed help with but you definitely didn't want to let him leave. Not yet and not if he went somewhere else and other women got to oogle him. You stepped aside and motioned for him to come in, "I'm sure there's…something."

The man trailed after you, closing the door sharply as he leaned against it. You raised an eyebrow at him but he just continued his quiet and calm stare down. You swore that man could see right into your soul and knew all of your deepest and darkest secrets. You swallowed thickly as you waited with baited breath for what he had to say, "you remember last Halloween?"

"Of course I do," as if you could even forget that night, "what about it?"

"Aren't you going to ask me?"

"Ask what?"

"Don't play coy with me, sweetheart," ugh. Why did he have to sound like that when he called you such sweet things? It should have been illegal, "ask me."

"Are you, Joel Miller…single?" Your heart skipped a few beats as you waited for his response. You were almost positive you knew his answer but still - you could never be positive. He came a step closer and left a much smaller gap between the two of you. You could smell the hints of his soap and aftershave and it sent shivers down your spine.

"I am," he admitted softly, the corners of his mouth ticking up in a smile, "but I think that I don't want to be. So I guess depending on your next answer, mine might change."

Butterflies exploded in your tummy as you tried to read between the lines. Not that that was incredibly hard but you never knew.

"W-what is your next question?" Your voice sounded small as you found it hard to meet his pretty brown eyes. Joel reached over and gently put his finger under your chin and turned your face up to his. His touch was so tender that you almost melted, "Joel?"

"May I kiss you?"

Yeah…you'd been expecting that and not expecting it at all. You allowed yourself to meet his eyes, trying to make sure you'd heard him correctly. Judging from the look on his face, you'd definitely heard correctly. You nodded in response, not trusting your voice at all.

"Need to hear you say it, sweetheart…"

"Yes," you moved closer, "please kiss me."

It took Joel a moment to close the small space remaining between your bodies. One hand settled on your waist while the other cupped your cheek. He pulled you into him and then softly and slowly kissed you. 

It wasn't much at first, a gentle and tentative testing of the waters to make sure you were both on the same page. When you realized, in a moment of bliss, that you both desperately wanted this, you went all in. Kissing Joel felt like nothing you'd ever experienced before you and you couldn't help but want more, more, more. When Joel answered your call with just as much hunger and intensity, you knew this was it.

 Both of you refused to pull away until you were desperately in need of air. For two people that had just been incredibly bold, you were both looking at each other shyly. 

"Are you single?" He asked you in between a few more kisses, craving the touch and taste of your lips.

 "Mhmm," you hummed back contentedly, "but I don't wanna be."

"What do you want then, sweetheart?" He had to be doing this on purpose. But as much as you wanted to say it, he needed to hear it. Needed to know that he wasn't just crazy and imagining all the feelings that had been flowing between the two of you.

"You," you whispered against his lips, "I want you, Joel."

"You have me," he promised as you relaxed and let yourself melt into him completely, "have since I met you."

"Oh. Oh," your eyes grew wide as he took your face in his hands, thumb brushing over your cheek, "its been a long time."

"Yeah," he agreed, "it has been."

"I-I've liked you too," you admitted sheepishly, "for a long time. I've just never…none if you felt the same."

"And here I was thinking that I was being so obvious," he tutted softly, "I'll have to try and be more clear in my intentions. If you'll let me."

"Mhmm," every part of your body felt like it was on fire, "I'd like that."

"Good," he beamed at you before pressing kisses to your forehead, cheeks and stopping at your lips, "what do you say we go to that Halloween party tonight? Together?"

"I'd love to," you could barely contain your giggles as he scooped you up and started to carry you upstairs, "what are you doing?"

"Going to help you finish getting ready," he grinned at you, "among other things. Plus I'm the only one that gets to see you like this, yeah?"

"Yes," you were excited at the prospect of everything that was to come. Everything felt like it was starting to come up roses. Who would have thought that one silly little Halloween promise would have led to all of this? Best Halloween ever - well maybe with the exception of what to come tonight, "yes."

"Happy Halloween, sweetheart."

"Happy Halloween, Joel."

#joel miller #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #joel miller x fem!reader #joel miller imagine #joel miller one shot #pedro pascal #tlou

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

So I spent a chunk of today very confused as to why this photo affected me so much. Why is Rhys, as Stede, in this photo, so dopamine inducing?

I’m a Quality Assurance Specialist / Software Developer by day, so I HATE not understanding how things work, and I thought, “Why not look at smaller pieces of it, one at a time to see what it’s made of?”

I decided to start on the light side of his face.

On this side you can see the signature smirk, and the sparkle in his eye. The foreground is lit and the background is bringing your eye towards the stairs, which triggers the imagination, because where does it go? Does he want you to go with him?

That’s the first thing I think that I realised made this photo so enticing to me, it’s not just a picture of Stede, it’s a picture of Stede with the promise of going somewhere with him. Somewhere you don’t know. He’s looking directly at the camera, and he’s grinning, and he’s focused on YOU.

Add to that-- bedroom eyes at their finest.

Moving on to the dark side of his face:

The tone has completely changed. Without the smirk, he looks confused or almost uncomfortable/nervous. The vein in his neck is tightened, and the adams apple looks like he just swallowed air, the eyebrow, not coupled with the smirk is furrowed slightly.

Now, in general I’d just like to shout out how amazing his facial range is, that Rhys can have two sides with different expressions. His physical comedy and acting is always so impressive to me. He must have cheek muscles for days. Moving on.

Back to the right side for a moment, but not the eyes. I’m convinced in some weird part of my brain that he’s got hypnotic powers in them because they always make me swoon, but I digress (really I think it’s just he uses his expressions to the fullest, and people can smile and provide intent with their eyes).

ANYWAY— both sides of the smirk are visible and so both parts look positive again, both look well meaning and playful. The view of the right cheek (his left) is really pronounced, so you can really tell he’s not just smirking but smiling, so it's a more intense look.

The arm position is more provocative, once again, shoulder and elbow directing your eyes to the stairs.

Provocative, as well, because of the hint of a bare chest. Strings as opposed to thick fabric in general seem to evoke more of a sexual intent (thongs, bikinis, etc). Like one pull of a string away and the whole thing will unravel. Again, enticing and suggestive.

Alright, on to the other arm. I didnt go into it much in the last picture of this side because I feel like his face distracts from the body language (because his face distracts from everything!). The shoulder is peaked, which even though he’s reaching up, gives off that feeling of a shrug which in itself can be suggestive if delivered in the right context.

The part that really stands out to me though is the fingers in the tassel. As we’ve seen in some of his other movies, and the scene at the restaurant before they run off, Rhys has purposeful but gentle finger movements— much like Stede's general personality.

Example 1: Love Birds

Example 2: Coconut Stede - GIF by bizarrelittlemew

They really are a tease. So much so that I've considered doing another appeal to the court, this time regarding Rhys’ slutty fingers, but I digress.

You can't see the tips of his fingers in the shot with the tassel, but it’s the reaching, and the obviously delicate touch that once again adds to the whole awkward yet suggestive nature of his arm.

Next up, no hands or elbow, just lower left jaw and chest. I mentioned previously that the vein in his neck looks tense. Without the eyes to provide context, it does look like he’s maybe a bit nervous.

From there, follow the line from his nose all the way down. Nose, to smile lines, to neck vein, which lines up perfectly with the seam in his shirt, which then draws your attention several ways, to the arm, down the shirt to the belt, or down the collar to the strings in the bare chest. That vein connects everywhere else together. We may not recognise it consciously, but these lines in photos and drawings can really make a difference in tone and intent.

Now after all that, time to go back to the face, this time framed a bit differently. Full Rhys headshot without the dark background with the stairs.

This shot, without the rest, looks much more confident to me. Less suggestive, and more haughty which I feel like is his signature captain look.

Please reference anytime he's in the English uniform, good lord.

A fun little extra thing, in this shot you can see the ring, bright gold, and it matches his hair. Harder to see that in the other shots because there’s too much else going on.

So, overall, this BTS photo is just generally phenomenal. It keeps the most important thing, Stede, lit and in the forefront but leaves trails for where your eyes should wander.

I think the reason this picture affects me so viscerally is because of the pure chaos of feelings in it. You have Confident Stede, Delicate Stede, Nervous Stede, Suggestive Stede, Playful Stede, Kind-eyed Stede, and it’s very much so much about the viewer. He’s looking at YOU, not at the person taking the picture. He’s expressing all those emotions at YOU. YOU are being offered to take his hand and go up to the dance and who knows where else. When I say "YOU", I mean Ed really in this context, but YOU get to feel like Ed for a bit in this photo.

You get to feel that goofy, accepting, loveable man dote on you, even for just a moment. For me personally, I've been starved for a long time of emotional affection, despite being married, and this kind of a glimpse into what Ed can and does experience is both tortuous and incredibly encouraging. It brings hope, and joy, and is just all around absolutely glorious. Thank you Samba and the rest of the bts crew that keep sharing these amazing glimpses of heaven.

#ofmd #our flag means death #stede bonnet #gentlebeard #rhys darby #ofmd bts #how can i get any work done when rhys darby exists #thank you samba #totally normal for rhys darby tumblr association

[demonicbaby666]

Could you pretty please with a cherry on top write friends to lovers, one bed trope with the amazing Jennifer Jareau 😍 I need all the fluffy love confession and if you could manage maybe a little bit of spice 😅 thank you!

One Room Left

One shot | Criminal Minds Masterlist | Masterlists

Fandom: Criminal Minds 

Pairing: Jennifer Jareau x fem!Reader

Genre: Fluff and smut

Words: 4.8k+

Warnings: : fingering (R and JJ receiving), oral (R), swearing, there's not really any topping or bottoming going on...

Summary: It's just your average friends to lovers fic. Reader and JJ share a bit of an awkward moment that seems to shift their dynamic and open their eyes to a truth they aren’t sure they’re ready for.

a/n: I do apologise for how long it took me to write this, but I did it! I like the beginning, though the end is meh ☹️. I know I slacked a little with the spice but I really just wanted to get this finished and posted, so hope you enjoy! 💜 (not proof read well so, as always, I apologise for any mistakes)

Your eyes fluttered open to the sound of the front door shutting and a blazing alarm clock penetrating your eardrums right by the side of your head. The morning sun slithered in through the small gap between the curtains, offering rays of light to shine through the room and fall steadily on your face, warming patches of skin. 

Opting for not smashing the insipid device, you mindlessly reached over to turn off the infernal blaring, shuffling out of bed and padding towards the faint hums coming from the kitchen, wafts of coffee growing stronger with each step. 

JJ was standing by the coffee machine, hips swaying to a quiet melody she’d most likely been listening to in the car, that was now stuck in her head. Blonde locks were tousled over petite shoulders, hypnotically moving side to side, and her hands moved around fishing out utensils she needed, showing just how familiar and acquainted she was with the confines of your apartment. 

“By all means, make yourself at home.” you deadpanned, causing JJ to jump. 

“When do I not.” she replied, cheeks beginning to take on a light rosy hue as she struggled not to let her eyes wander over your body, clad in a silk night dress that stopped dangerously high on your thighs, “Get changed, we have a case. I’ll put this in a to-go cup.” 

“They’re in the-” 

“Top cabinet to the right, I know.” she smugly interrupted, the corners of her mouth twitching skywards to form a boyish smile. 

Turning back around and heading back to your bedroom you couldn’t help noticing the routine you and JJ had found yourselves in, natural, that’s what it felt like waking up and her face being the first you’d see. A weird tingle buzzed through your body as you slipped into your work attire. The humming from outside your room had reconvened, which you didn’t mind one bit, in fact, it made it impossible to wipe the dopey grin off your face. 

Ever since you joined the team you and JJ just clicked, the connection and kinship growing with each case, each girls night, each smile, each laugh - laughs that drowned out the heaviness of the job and the reality of what you’d both, day in and day out, have to deal with. 

Leaning on each other came naturally, which was weird for the both of you, being that you’d habitually keep your walls up around everyone, too afraid to burden the ones around you because, let’s face it, they had their own shit to deal with. 

Yet somehow, those rules never applied to each other. Feelings, doubts, and worries slipped out easily enough, the security of holding each other whilst streams of tears trickled down your faces never once left either of you feeling vulnerable or weak. At some point, words seemed unnecessary between the two of you; reading facial expressions and body language had become second nature, you’d found someone who somehow knew you better than yourself at times, and you her.

After a few minutes of shuffling around in the bathroom, you made your way back out to JJ, who was already standing by the door, keys in hand ready to go. 

“Someone’s eager to get going.”

“It’s not like there’s a life on the line or anything.” she humorously quipped, arching an eyebrow and holding out your coffee.

“Fair point.” 

Reaching out to grab the cup, your fingers brushed over JJ’s, but she didn't pull away. Instead, she let her fingers linger under yours. Blue eyes locked onto yours and the room disappeared for all of three seconds before she abruptly pulled her hand away and averted her gaze to the door. 

“Come on slowpoke.” She called out over her shoulder, already out of the apartment. 

What the hell was that? And why was your hand still tingling from the feel of her soft skin against your own? You shook yourself out of your stunned state. Taking a deep breath, trying to push aside the last minute, you told yourself your elevated heartbeat was completely normal, thinking it safer to assume you had a heart condition than feelings for a friend. Assuming otherwise was a dangerous path to go down and you couldn’t afford to blur the lines between friendship and something else, not when you’d finally found someone like JJ, you couldn’t risk losing her to fleeting moments that had the possibility of amounting to nothing. Pushing forward you locked the door and followed JJ to the car. 

The drive over to Quantico was as it always was, filled with off-key singing and barrels of laughter. You’d never tire of hearing her laugh, the symphony was a gift from the gods, eliciting a warmth to coax your whole body into a state of comfort you’d spent the majority of your life denying you needed. 

As JJ’s eyes were fixed on the road, it allowed you the time to appreciate her true beauty. Her blonde hair, sporting waves that morning, bristled against her face as she bobbed her head to the blasting drums coming from the speakers. It was always funny to you how JJ still found ways of surprising you, firstly it was her love of rock music - that she’d somehow managed to get you into - then it was how atrociously messy she could be. The first time you’d looked into her desk drawers, in search of a working pen, it took everything not to gasp. 

When you turned back to her in shock, her face revealed a look of pure innocence and slight wonder. When she’d asked, “Did you find one?” so sweetly, you hadn’t the heart to let her know finding something as small as a pen in that mess was all but hopeless. The real kicker was about five minutes later she’d walked over with three different pens, and you had to admit, it may have been a mess, but in true JJ style, she knew how to navigate through it. 

Her slender fingers tapped on the steering wheel in beat with Killing in the Name of, lips pursed and head continuously moving around, it was safe to say, she was in her element. And by god was it both hot and adorable? Wait. Hot? Friends could most definitely admit they found the other stunning, it wasn’t unusual - right? Right. The butterflies in your stomach that accompanied distant looks of unbridled passion? That was an issue for another time. 

Before a wave of unruly questions could plague your mind, JJ pulled into the parking lot and found an available bay, ushering you out of the car and towards the elevator. The briefing went by pretty fast and soon enough everyone was headed to the jet. Once you were up in the air everyone gathered around to go over victimology before splitting ways and doing their own things. 

You moved to the sofa, JJ following, which wasn’t uncommon, however, what was, was the distance she was keeping. The gap between your two seated bodies felt cold and foreign, it was the first sign that something was off. JJ pulled out her phone and got to work beating a high score on whatever new game she was addicted to - she seemed to have a new one every couple of months. 

Not wanting to draw attention to something that could in fact be nothing, you opened your book and started reading. 

An hour had passed, and the jet's occupants had all settled, it was quiet, eerily quiet. Maybe it was the fact you were used to chatting with JJ, or that usually you’d have some form of physical contact with her, but now you had neither. You tried to act normal but with each passing second your thoughts grew louder and louder, the words on the page made no sense, and for the fifth time, you re-read the same sentence, still not processing it. 

Defeated, you slammed it shut, drawing the attention of several sets of eyes, “Major character death.” You announced. 

JJ leaned over to look at the book sitting closed in your lap. A small smirk tugged at her lips; her eyebrow raised as she picked up the book. It was Pride and Prejudice, a book she knew moderately well, and one that contained no such death. 

“You know, if you’re going to lie, at least make it a believable one.” She placed the book face down on your lap, letting out a small chuckle through her nose before going back to her phone. You were thankful for the game or whatever had her full attention, it meant she’d fail to see the crimson hue that now burned bright on your cheeks. 

After the jet landed, the team split up to work on the case. You and JJ went your separate ways, JJ claiming she had a couple of questions she wanted to clear up with the M.E, which was complete and utter bullshit that you saw right through but didn’t mention. 

Emily drove the both of you to the local sheriff station, sitting in comfortable silence, you replayed the events of the morning, nothing was different from the normal. Of course, there was the coffee cup incident, you’d felt the shift in the room, though you attributed your inability to react like a normal human as the reason you thought it held such gravitas. 

The car came to a halt, “I don’t think I've ever heard you so quiet.” Emily’s voice rang through the silence. 

“Mmmm.” Your attention glued out the window, while your mind was elsewhere. 

“Alright out with it, what’d you do?” 

“Hey!” You snapped, finally turning to Emily, who was grinning ear to ear. You tried to fight it, but a small smile crept into your lips, “Why does it always have to be me who did something?”

The traffic lights changed and she refocused her gaze to the road ahead, “Because it’s you.”

“Hmmm, can’t argue with that logic.” 

It went quiet for a few seconds, “So… JJ’s acting weird…” 

“Thank fuck!” you said a little louder than needed, “I thought it was just me.” 

Emily parked up and turned back to you, “You want me to talk to her? Find out what you did to piss her off.” 

“Honestly you have such a way with words Emily,” that earned you a playful slap to the side of your arm, “It’s fine, I’ll have a chat with her later. Both of us need to focus on the case right now. We all do.”

Although the rest of the day was stressful, it was better, easier even, to focus on the case than endure the torturous thoughts of a certain blonde. JJ kept her distance, it was easy enough for you to pick up on it, the team seemed not to notice, too busy focusing on the case, which you should have been doing. 

Instinctively Emily came to your side now and then, offering comforting smiles and light touches. Unbeknown to you, Emily had only done this when she’d caught JJ’s eyes roaming over your sullen state. 

Dusk came, exhaustion weighed heavy on the team, having spent the day endlessly scouring through paperwork, Hotch knew it was time to call it a day, telling the team to head to the local motel. No complaints were heard. JJ instantly beelined her way over to you, instilling the fear of God into your pounding heart. Then she smiled, she smiled that signature cheeky tight-lipped smile, and instantly you were at ease, “Ride with me?” 

For some strange reason, a light blush rose to your cheeks, “Lead the way, chauffeur.” 

The walk to the car was unsurprisingly silent, willing your stomach to crawl in on itself. How had things changed so fast? Why had they changed so fast? There were more and more questions running through your mind as you pulled the passenger seat door open and hopped in, this couldn’t wait. Before JJ had even finished buckling herself in, your lips moved of their own accord, letting out emotions you’d tried to keep locked away the entirety of the day. 

“JJ, what’s going on? You’ve been off with me all day. Did I do something? Did you do something? God, I can’t stand this, I half thought when you were walking up to me you were going to knock-” 

“Wow, wow, wow,” turning quickly towards you, JJ cut in, worried you were about to pass out from the air you’d been depriving yourself of. Your trembling hands, resting over your thighs, stilled when she placed hers atop them, running delicate circles into the soft skin. “Breathe. Just breathe for a second.”

And you did as you were told, closing your eyes for a split second, you focused on the rise and fall of your chest, the pounding of your heart, the feel of JJ’s hands prying all the distress from your body with each small stroke on her thumbs. When your eyes fluttered back open, you nearly lost it all over again. Her blue doe eyes had only moved an inch closer and there was still a good distance between the two of you but seeing her - even just that little bit closer - sent you toppling into what could only be described as a childlike state of wonderment. 

Her eyes shimmered in the dim light of the car, small bulbs of light reflecting lowly in her pupils, her cheeks jutted outwards from the small smile she wore, and you let yourself get lost in the comfort she was exuding. This was JJ, this was what she did, she didn’t need to have her arms around you to embrace you, it was her smiles, her banter, her laugh that coaxed your body into a state of relaxation. Safe, JJ was your safe haven.

“Better?” 

“Ya, thanks,” you looked down at your lap, staring at the small contact that meant so much to you. Her hands were just about to slip away, you’d missed her all day and weren’t ready to let go of the moment just yet. Interlacing your fingers between hers, you lowered her hands back down to your lap and met her ocean eyes once more, only now you used your thumbs to run circles over the backs of her hands, “Talk to me. What happened today Jayje?”

“It’s just the case,” she sighed, “I’m exhausted that’s all and I didn’t want to take it out on you. So, I thought it’d be better to distance myself a little.” 

“You are your hyper-independency,” you chuckled, trying to lighten the mood, “don’t push me away though. I mean it, or I’ll be forced to pry the truth out of you in some other way.” 

“That sounds slightly ominous.” She said with a raised brow.

“Let me provide some clarification.” You untangled your hands from hers, lunging forward over the console to torture her with light tickles.

Giggled, she giggled, over and over until she could barely breathe, “Okay! Okay! MERCY!” She begged, hands flying to your shoulder trying to push you away. 

You stopped, the mood quickly shifting as you stared into her eyes. She stopped pushing you away, her fingers settling over the curve of your shoulders, “Promise you won’t push me away like that again?” 

She swallowed the lump in her throat, darting her eyes over your face, then to the loose strands of hair that had escaped throughout the day, “Promise.” She whispered, tucking the strays behind your ears. 

It was like déjà vu. Feelings within you - much similar to the ones you’d experienced that very morning - awakened, your stomach fluttered, skin suddenly on fire, flushed with nerves, and an odd trickle of excitement. 

You had to stop, the lines were blurring, and you couldn’t lose her. JJ may have said it was the case that goaded her into keeping her distance but deep down you knew that wasn’t the full story, and you couldn’t afford to risk another day, another week, a lifetime of not being able to have her close within the parameters of friendship. So you pulled away, tore your eyes off of her, and hoped things would be okay again. 

The drive to the motel was a short one and it was unsurprising to see the whole team had already arrived. No one other than Emily was in sight as you and JJ walked into the lobby. 

“Everything okay?” You asked Emily. 

“Only one room left,” she replied, looking between you and the blonde. “And since you two got here last…”

Great, sharing a bed with the woman you were trying to suppress your feelings for. Just great. 

JJ nudged your shoulder, “Looks like you’re with me.” 

“Oh gosh! However, will I cope!” You teased.

“There’s no hope for you,” she said with a smirk. Placing a finger to her chin in mock thought, “I guess you could just sleep in the car.” 

“Nice try. But you can’t get rid of me that easy.” 

She side-eyed the key and sat on the front counter, “Is that so?” 

“Don’t even think about it.” You warned. 

“Too late!” Swiping the key, she bolted out the door in search of your room. 

Quick on your feet you ran after her, “You little shit!” 

“Children. I work with children.” Emily said to herself, smirking and shaking her head. 

Once you finally caught up to JJ, she’d just about opened the door, crashing into the back of her, you rugby tackled her to the bed, closing the door behind you with your foot. A series of laughter filled the small room, a warmth spreading in your chest hearing the sweet symphony rumble in her throat. You slumped down next to her, both of you staring up at the ceiling as laughter faded into silence. 

“Chicken.” She whispered. 

“What?”

“I want to play chicken. I ask a question, and you answer.” 

“And if I get it right?”

“Just close your eyes okay?” she breathed out. 

Shuffling to get a little more comfortable on your back, you shut your eyes and waited.

“My favourite colour?”

“Easy. Turquoise, like your birthstone.”

JJ moved closer. 

“One of my fears.” 

“The woods, because, how’d you put it? Yes, because they’re the woods.” She let out a breathy laugh, scooching an inch closer. 

“On my right arm t-.”

“There’s a scar you got when you were nine, you were playing with Rosaline, a wheelbarrowing game gone wrong.” 

Everything went quiet, then the bedsheets ruffled; you could feel the heat radiating from her body, her breath tickling the side of your face, and the smell of her perfume permeated your senses.

“Look at me.” her warm breath tumbled into the shell of your ear, causing your heart to stop within your chest. Taking a well-needed gulp of air into your lungs you opened your eyes and turned around. You were so close to her that your noses were practically touching. Tears were brimming on her waterline. As she searched your eyes they retreated, fading into the milky white sclera. 

“Hi.” She whispered, hot breath warming your lips. 

“Hey to you too.” 

Her eyebrows knit together, “I don’t want anything to change between us.” 

“Why would they?” you questioned. 

She retreated back in on herself, regret washing over her face and she began to move away, “I don’t know. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything.” you couldn’t let this moment fade, not yet, not like this. Reaching a hand out to her waist, you pulled her body against your own.

“You’re my best friend, the one person who gets me, who knows me. I don’t want to lose you.” It was hard to read her expression through the haze of tears forming, but the way her body relaxed under your touch told you it couldn’t have been one of discomfort. 

“And you won’t.” She uttered, her lips ghosting over yours, “ever.”

“Then kiss me already.” 

Closing the minimal space between you, JJ leaned forward, taking your bottom lip between her own. Fireworks set ablaze in your stomach, and sparks of passion ran through every vein in your body, traveling and dispersing a tingling sensation over your skin. It was unlike anything you had ever known, with one kiss JJ had tipped the world around you off its axis. 

The kiss was gentle, you let her take what she wanted, set the pace, and live in the moment. You needed to know this was definitely what she wanted. Her slick tongue ran along your bottom lip, asking for permission to take things a step further, and you happily obliged, parting your lips to let her in. Her tongue danced in unison with your own, and a small moan tumbled out your mouth into JJ’s. 

She threw her leg over your hips, sliding herself on top of you and resting her hands on either side of your head. Her head tilted sideways, deepening the kiss as your lips moved as one. 

“Is this okay?” she whispered against your lips.

“It’s more than okay,” you replied, placing your spare hand on the small of her back and pulling her closer against you. 

Undeniable passion grew within the kiss, it was faster, harder, and less controlled. Moans and whimpers merged with one another, and you stopped trying to figure out whether they were coming from you or JJ. 

There was next to no space between your two bodies, and as JJ’s shirt rod up you could feel her soft skin against the thin material of your t-shirt. Desperate to feel more of her, you ran your hands along the exposed skin, relishing in the sounds that came from JJ as you did so. 

Taking a chance, you let your fingers trail higher, grazing against the underside of her breast, then taking the globe and squeezing it. JJ sat up, prying her swollen lips away from yours, in one swift move she pulled her blouse over her head, taking her bra off with it. Reaching out for your hands perched on her waist, she guided them over her perky breasts. 

Her head flew back the moment you began massaging the supple flesh, bottom lip wedged between her teeth, holding back moans. Unable to hold on any longer you pulled yourself up and took a pert nipple into your mouth, letting your tongue circle around to hard nub. JJ’s hands became frantic, fumbling with the bottom of your shirt, needing to see more of you, all of you. 

Clothes were quickly shed off, puddles of material scattered around the motel room floor. Hands explored and wandered over each other’s bodies. A heat pulsed between your legs, your slick lips were pressed against JJ’s thigh, and it was becoming near impossible not to grind against her, desire for some sort of friction becoming overpowering. Slowly cantering your hips, a whimper spilled from your lips when your clit rubbed along JJ’s toned thigh. You could have screamed when she pulled it away a few moments later. 

“Please.” You didn’t know exactly what you were pleading for, nor did you care, you’d take anything JJ would give. Her hand trailed over your stomach, moving further and further down until they were right where you needed them to be. Two fingers ran through your dripping folds, gathering your arousal on her fingers, then back up to circle your clit. A high-pitched wail caught in your throat, your hands wrapped around JJ’s neck and thread through silky blonde tresses, needing to feel her lips again, there would never be a second - you now knew - that you wouldn’t need them. They completed you; she completed you, filling a missing piece of your heart, one you didn’t even know was gone until she showed you what it was to be whole. 

JJ's lips moved to plant kisses along your jawline, reaching your neck she lightly sucked, bringing blood to the surface of your skin, likely leaving a mark. It felt too good to tell her to stop, concealer existed for a reason after all. Her lips wrapped around a hardened nipple, sucking with so much purpose it sent a whole new wave of wetness to pool between your legs. Your back arched pushing yourself further into JJ’s mouth, her free hand came down from beside your head to tweak the neglected nipple. 

Your skin burned, sensitive to each touch, every caress, and you no longer made a conscious effort to silence the small mewls spilling from your lips. Keeping her fingers trained on your clit, she continued her descent, leaving behind a trail of red blotches along the planes of your stomach. 

Her fingernails grazed down your ribcage, and it was as though they were scorching themselves into you, the line left behind burned and tingled in the most delicious of ways. Propping yourself on your elbows you beheld the view, blonde hair cascading over your thighs, obstructing you from seeing what JJ did next. She pulled her fingers away, before the pleasure had time to subside, she pushed her wet fingers deep inside you with no warning, her hot mouth engulfing your sensitive bundle of nerves at the same time. She repeatedly started laving it with the flat of her tongue. 

Dual pleasure sent your body crashing backward onto the bed, her fingers set a steady pace inside you, and the wet sounds of your sex and JJ’s tongue only served to further turn you on. Your moans were getting gradually louder as JJ picked up speed. Her fingers worked harder, thrusting further and further into your dripping sex until she was knuckle-deep every time.

A tension was forming low in your stomach, between moans you were helplessly trying to pull in what oxygen you could, but it was helpless. You gripped onto the bed sheets, hoping maybe they could keep you anchored. 

A third finger slipped inside you, filling your tight canal fully. All three fingers curled, caressing the ridges of your inner walls, pulling out to the very tips then pushing all the way back in and effortlessly hitting your g spot. JJ kept up her new routine, hearing the effect it was having on you. She alternated between sucking, licking, and teething your engorged clit. You pried your hands away from the sheets, gripping onto JJ’s hair instead to hold her in place as you moved in rhythm with the fingers she had inside you. 

The world around you faded as your whole body gave out on you, and your hips jerked off the bed, thanks to JJ’s hand on your stomach, they didn’t get far. She sucked harder and her fingers pumped so fast they had you seeing stars. The tension in your lower stomach was at an all-time high, your walls clamped around her fingers, holding her in place as she fucked you to your breaking point. With one swipe of her tongue, you unravelled - panting, and sobbing as your orgasm crashed over you. Your head pressed hard into the mattress, mouth agape pulling in drags of air through silent cries. 

Slowing her movements to a halt, JJ waited till you rode out the full extent of your orgasm before sliding her fingers out. When you finally opened your eyes, her head was moving up your body, settling for a few moments in the nape of your neck, peppering feather-light kisses over the salty patch of skin, your fingers appreciatively traced circles into her scalp. You both contently hummed, happy to just live in that moment.

“You’re beautiful.” The words vibrate against your neck and for the first time in your life, you truly believed the statement. 

Guiding her up by her head, you joined your lips together, moaning at the heady taste of yourself. Overtaken by a primitive need, you flipped JJ on her back, a squeak of a surprise cut short when your lips came crashing down to silence her. Taking the stickiness on your thigh as an indication, you slid two fingers into JJ. 

It was overwhelming to feel all of her, have her completely, you’d never wanted anything or anyone more. As you carried her to her peak you kept your eyes glued on her, a thin sheen of sweat clung to her skin, her chest rose and fell, and her tight stomach muscles tensed over and over. Her moans were hypnotic, your new favourite sound, and you’d die happy if it was the last sound you’d ever hear. 

“You’re perfect.” You whispered into her ear. With that final push, she came all over your fingers, crying out a modicum of incoherent syllables that resembled your name. She pulled you into her and kissed you. You poured everything you felt into the kiss, tears of joy prickling in your eyes as you felt her return all the love you willingly gave.

That night you fell asleep in her arms, the arms of your best friend, the arms of the woman who knew everything about you, the good along with the bad, and loved you all the more for it.

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[thevoidscreams]

Hello!

I would like to see something with Mortarion. Pre heresy when he's feeling unloved as he's not quite living up to the emperor's vision for him. He's supposed to be the second strongest Psycher of the Primarchs yet he Refuses to use his power.

Even pre monster form I've always loved the idea that Mortarion is gardener/herbalist in his spare time. Collecting plants from conquered worlds and giving them a home in a personal green house of sorts.

A servant who is commonly sent to give him messages/retrieve him when needed strikes up a bond with him over his eclectic garden.

They marvel at his plant expertise and abilities. They give him an outlet to talk about his special interest in detail. They support his passions and even offer understanding about why he's uncomfortable using his magic.

Overtime spent in that humid greenhouse, both start to feel it, the attraction. The brief glances or gentle brushes of hands as they talk and work in unison.

Mortarion has never really felt anything like this. And so strongly! It frightens him. Frightens him because he fears chasing this small glimmer of happiness away if he oversteps.

But oh...Oh he dreams of the alternative. Of bodies pressed into intimate warmth, of kisses stolen quickly or bitten ravenously while he towers over his sweet one. It feels like he can barely control himself, and it's only getting worse.

Little does he know his little honey bee is already swooned to him, but they too fear overstepping. They're a baseline human, and Mortarion is a demigod like figure. He'd never view them in such a way.

They shall be content being his mortal confidant, his sidekick so to speak. They've even acquired a special gift for him to show their care (and sooth the heartache for a love that they believe will never be.) A beautiful floral specimen from their own home world. In their world's language of flowers these blooms represent eternal devotion and love.

Its a subtle way to confess their feelings, and also find closure. After all they're certain Mortarion doesn't know their planet's flower language.

... Now what happens when he turns out he Does.

(For making press March if its not clear. You do great stuff btw okay byyyyyy)

Day thirteen!!!

Pairing Mortarion x reader

Warnings: Sex, first-time sex for Mort, and two idiots in love.

Mortarion stared down at the pots in front of him. His hearts hammering in his massive chest.

The plant's colorful petals shine especially bright among the other plants. They were gifts after all that made they special. Even among all the strange and alien plants he’d gathered over the years.

He’d collected you much the same way, once nothing more than a go for, a messenger who he enjoyed seeing. Until he could no longer bear to see you go, wondering when he would see you next. If he ever saw you again at all. So he took you, just as he did his plants. Pulling rank to have you reassigned to his conservatory. Where you’d expressed a good deal of knowledge about plants. He was certain it had been the right move as you had seemed to grow into the role naturally.

He’d even made changes for you. Something he’d done for no others. Such as adding several water features with live animals. It made the place hum with new life. Mortarion would watch you buzz from one task to another, bust like a bee. It was how he took to calling you his honeybee. His sweet little bee.

As he pondered, the last words you spoke to the primarch bounced around his head.

‘They reminded me of you when I saw them.’ You said, offering him the gifts. His hands brushing yours not so accidentally as he took them. Lingering a moment longer than was strictly necessary.

‘Is that so?’

‘Yep.’

‘And why is that?’

Your cheeks had tinged pink with a blush and it made him smile under his mask.

‘They just have a nice meaning.’ You told him quickly and ducked away to go prune some fruit trees.

His mind raced, a blue orchid, and a red rose. His mind pulled up the meaning of these plants but he was sure he must have misremembered. He’d gone to his study to find his old book about gifting plants and the symbolism of the colors and species.

He hadn’t misremembered. In fact he’d been spot on.

Orchids, the book had said, were a flower that could be symbolized by love, desire and sexuality. But could also be symbols of good luck, harmony, good health and good fortune. They were blue however. The rarest color form of orchid was blue and they were unique.

On its own the orchid wasn’t a dead give away and he could have pondered the meaning of it for a long time, with still no confidence to act.

But the roses. His hearts fluttered again. Roses had many meanings, all of which had multiple meanings. But red was impossible to mistake when given as a gift. They weren’t the pink of gratitude, or the yellow of friendship or even orange which could mean fascination.

You’d mentioned the meaning specifically when giving them to him.

And red, or at least in rose language, was meant to represent devotion, passion, romance, desire, and true love. It was a lover’s flower. Given to him by the one he loved so ardently it hurt.

He came back to himself as raindrops began to pelt the roof and shake him from his recollection. He stood lifting the potted plants and taking them to a place of prominence in his conservatory. Where all would see them and admire them.

He waited for you to return today. His thumb caressing the petal of the rose. Imagining it was your lip, soft and supple as you lay under his body.

He’d gone without his armor, only a mask to aid in his breathing.

HIs hands reached for a spade as he shook the images of you from his mind.

Instead he focused on his plants and their needs. Caring for them. Just as he would care for you. If you were his.

His mind continued to stir as he continued to plant, turning soil so that his lovely roses would be able to grow into a magnificent bush.

Would your love grow that way? Blooming as it took root and grew into something more.

The door to the flower garden opened and he heard you approach. He wondered if he should find you and confront you about the flowers you’d chosen.

He decided to let you work for a bit. Hoping beyond all hope that he wouldn’t scare you away. You were perhaps his only real chance at love.

He looked up at the glass windows high above and watched as the rain that fell in sheets across the glass.

The rose was planted and watered.

He would go find you now.

You had been trimming dead leaves from a butterfly bush. Helping so that hopefully the new growth would have a chance.

Mortarion had even said that he would let you have some butterflies to liven up the space once he was able to source them.

On the outside he was often grumpy. But inside you knew he was hurting. Despite that he took your help in the conservatory graciously and was kind to you.

Your hand stroked over one of the bicolored flower stocks. The purple and orange enchanting you.

Your mind drifted to the feeling of his hands on yours and the even rarer case of his hand on your back as he sometimes did to direct you.

They were so big, they’d easily be able to hold you. Easily cover your body as he… it felt like your face caught fire it got so warm.

You wished you could have just told him you loved him outright. But if he didn’t feel the same you ran the risk of his sending you away. Of him replacing you as his assistant and maybe.. Falling in love with the next one.

It hurt so bad to think about that you almost dropped your clippers. No, you would give him flowers, and keep the secret of your love in your heart. Where it would grow with every passing day till it consumed your whole self. LIke mint left unchecked, spreading to every corner of the garden that was your body.

“You’re here early.” The sound of his voice shocked you and you did drop your clippers. He reached out and snatched them, lightning quick despite his size. His font was pressed to your back and the heat of Mortarion’s body chased away the chill you’d gotten from the rain coming in.

“Yes. Thank you.” You turned to look up at him, slotting your clippers into your tool belt.. Eyes wide and warm.

“I was hoping to see where you put the plants I gave you.”

Mortarion nodded. “I just finished planting the rose.

HIs hand found its way to your back. GUiding you along and warming you. It felt nice and it made another wave of very unprofessional things come to mind.

He led you to the main display, which had been empty while the primarch decided what he wanted to put there. You gasped when you saw the rose. It was planted in the main display.

“I am still trying to find the best place to put the orchid. But I assure you it will be a main attraction as well. It is too beautiful to be off in some corner. Things that are beautiful should be seen and appreciated.”

His eyes were on you as he said the last part. Of course you didn’t see as you were breathless about how much he had enjoyed the gifts.

Mortarion swallowed and knelt next to you, even then he was an inch taller than you.

“I need to ask you something. And I want you to be honest with me.”

You turned to face him, his yellow green eyes meeting yours.

“Yeah of course Mortarion, what up?” You felt unusually nervous.

“Why did you pick these blooms?” He asked seriously.

You told him you wouldn’t lie.

“If I’m honest with you, and you don’t like my answer..will you make me leave?”

Your eyes got a bit blurry as you pictured going back to your old life. Running messages and being yelled at for things that were in them despite them not being your fault. Or even worse, going back to a life without him. You didn’t want to lose any of what this place had to offer, but losing him might as well have been the same as dying.

“You will not. I promise you. You are far too important here to be rid of without serious cause.”

You nodded, slightly comforted.

“I got them for the meanings they hold.”

“ANd you know what they mean. Do you not?”

“I do.”

Mortarion figured as much, but his hearts were racing, he needed to hear you say it.

“Did you mean it? When you gifted me these plants knowing what they symbolized?”

“I did.” You brushed your hand over your arm. Certain you’d at the very least be laughed at. Who were you to make moves on a primarch of all people? You looked away. Mortarion was trembling.

You meant it. You really meant it.

His finger touched the bottom of your chin and turned you back to face him. His other hand came up to remove his mask. “I love you too.” He said softly.

Your jaw dropped and you were at a loss for words for a moment.

“You do?” You practically shouted.

Mortarion smiled. “I do.”

He took your hands and held them close to his chest. “Will you be mine, Honeybee?”

Your eyes widened and tears of joy dripped from your eyes. “Of course.”

You leaned in and kissed him.

Mortarion wrapped his arms around you. Your lips were every bit as loft and warm as he’d imagined on all those cold and lonely nights.

You stayed in each other’s embrace for a long minute, kissing one another with as the longing you’d both possessed.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a very long time.” You told him with a very dopey smile on your lips. Mortarion found himself falling in love all over again as he saw it and met it with one of his own.

“As have I.” the primarch told you.

“Well that and a few other things.” You admitted pressing your forehead to his.

“Such as?” He pressed, wondering if you were as desirous of him as he was of you.

Well, nothing ventured, nothing gained, you supposed.

“Things like feeling your hands on me. Or being laid down on the soft moss carpets in the other room and taken by a big handsome primarch…one like you.”

It was Mortarion’s turn to look at you, jaw dropped.

“Unless you don’t want to or don’t feel that way.” You amended quickly.

Mortarion just chuckled and kissed you again. He’d had that same fantasy, of taking you on the mossy ground next to the main water feature as the high waterfall crashed into the water below swallowing your cries so only he’d be able to hear you.

He pulled away slowly.

“There are many places in this conservatory I’ve daydreamed about teaching you a new way to ‘pollinate’ a flower.”

Your stomach did a little flip and you leaned into him.

“Well I always want to learn more. I’d be happy to learn whatever you will teach me.”

Mortarion stood and scooped you up into his arms. He had just the place.

He’d waited so long to have you. To love you. And now that you were his he was feeling rather uncharacteristically impatient to show you just how much he longed for you.

In the room with a pond of fish he’d had made for you, really he wondered how you hadn’t known he’d loved you sooner, there was an old willow, it was currently in bloom.

He took you under its branches. They draped around the tree like a skirt and completely blocked the view of the trunk from the rest of the room.

Mortarion set you down and kissed you again. “I would like to have you, fully. If that is amiable to you.”

“It is. I’ve had many daydreams under this tree.” You giggled.

“As have I.” He agreed. “I will start this, so that you know what I have to give you, and if it is not to your liking, I will understand.” There was an undeniable air of sadness about the statement but you couldn’t imagine not liking him in any capacity.

He raised his shirt and pulled it off. He was leanly muscled but very defined and your hands immediately went to his chest. He continued with his pants. Pulling them down to reveal his pale body in all its glory.

You were struck by how stark yet beautiful he was, not a single bit of hair on him aside from the long white locks on his head.

He stood waiting for your judgment.

You gave it readily. “You’re beautiful Mortarion. I’ve never seen anything like you. And I don’t think I ever will anywhere else. Your body is perfect to me. In all of its aspects.”

Your hands ran down his form, touching him in a way he’d thought he’d only experience in dreams.

“Then you are not repulsed by me?” The pale giant asked.

“No, I really like it.” You assured him immediately.

You took a step back as he knelt again waiting. Your hands tugging your shirt up, he reached out to unclip your belt of tools, setting them aside. He eyed your chest as you tossed the shirt over with his clothes and began on your pants. Pushing them down.

You were left standing almost naked before him in only a bra and panties.

His hands went to your hips and his mouth found your throat kissing the tender skin and making you shiver with delight.

You hooked your finger into your panties pushing them down and letting them fall.

Mortarion grabbed you, pulling you down into his lap as he sat.

He ran his hands up and down your body learning every curve and dip.

When his hands came back up you back he gently unclipped the bra. You pulled it away. Mortarion drew in a breath. You were the stunning thing in this conservatory, he was certain of that. And you were his, all his to have and hold and love.

He patted his lap. “Turn for me?” You did, sitting with your back to his chest as he reached down to stroke your damp lips. “You're absolutely breathtaking.” He sighed, rubbing the rough pads of his fingers over your impossibly soft pussy. Loving every inch of it as he did.

One finger probed your entrance and, finding it plenty wet, slid the finger in.

The action drew a moan from you and your head fell back on his shoulder. Letting him work. The finger brushed over a few sensitive spots, the primarch was watching, learning from each gasp and adjusting till he had you writhing in his lap from pleasure wrought by his own hands.

Every squeak or sound of satisfaction made him work his hand a bit harder. “I can take another.” You panted, yearning for more of him inside you. He gave it. His ring finger joined the middle and stretched you out more as he continued to observe, halting at any sign of pain, and waiting till you were comfortable before starting again. It was a process of stop and start that had you half mad with need. Once he mistook a sharp inhale of pleasure for pain and you almost screamed not to stop.

Whether he realized it or not his care for you was causing the worst case of edging you’d ever experienced. Drool dripped down from the corner of your mouth. Your head lulled to the side and a soft whine bubbled up from somewhere inside you.

“Please, just like that. Don’t stop.” Mortarion pressed a kiss to your forehead, happy to keep it up.

“How are you feeling my Honeybee?”

“Close.” You told him honestly.

“I want to feel you come.” He peppered a trail of kisses from your face, down your neck and nibbled your shoulder.

That sent you over the edge. You came hard on his fingers, and he worked you through it, steady and comforting.

His finger left you and he brought them up to his lips, he licked the juices off. The flavor made his cock all the harder. You slid from his lap, turning around to face him.

You reached for his cock and he stiffened. No one had touched him this way before.

He knew how this should work. Buth knowing and doing were two separate things.

He watched you stroke his cock curiously. Your eyes fixed on his as you bite your lip. It made him want to jump you. And as nice as it felt to have you touching him, he wanted me.

“I would like to have you, to fill you.” He rasped, his voice getting a bit hoarse. He cleared his throat and tried again.

“Please.”

He raised you back up into his lap as it felt right.

Lining up his leaking cock with your leaking pussy he was hopeful that it would suffice for making things easier.

It did, as big as he was compared to you, he pushed in and met no resistance. You’d been ready since you’d last cum. As good as it was, it wasn't enough, you wanted more.

Letting your weight aid you, you speared yourself on his cock till you couldn’t fit a single bit more. He was longer than he was thick, but that wasn’t much of an issue given the fact that even being on the thinner side it was still more than enough to stretch you. Putting mind numbing pressure on all those delicious places inside you.

“Will it be sufficient for the task at hand my Honeybee?” He breathed, his own head a bit fuzzy from the perfect warmth wrapped around his cock.

“Absolutely. Fuck even your cock is perfect.”

He hugged you close and pressed his face into your shoulder.

You both sat like that, intimately embraced and ready to finally make good on a fantasy you’d both had countless times.

You moved first, using your footing on the grassy earth to raise yourself up and then drop.

Mortarion's hands swiftly went to your ass and hips, helping you to move.

It was everything he’d reamed and so much more.

Soon enough your efforts were taken over by your lover, he raised you with ease and pushed you back down onto his cock with fervor.

That was just fine with you though. You kissed him deeply and allowed him to explore your mouth as he fucked you.

“Damn it all. Why didn’t I tell you sooner?” He asked with a bitter little laugh.

“Great question.” You told him moaning as his cock kissed your cervix gently. “I should have told you as soon as I realized.”

“And when was that?” The primarch asked.

“That first week I worked with you.”

Mortarion cursed in a language you couldn’t understand.

“We might have been married by now if that was the case.” He felt like such a fool, for the last few years you’d both been a source of love and light in each other's lives.

“I suppose we’ll have to make up for all that lost time then.”

Mortarion moaned and hugged you tight again, thrusting his hips up into you.

You came again, the already wet slap of skin becoming even wetter.

Mortarion fucked you a minute longer. His body grew hotter and the coil in his belly winding tighter as he got ready to cum inside someone for the first time. It was completely different from his hand. The thrusts grew sloppy and he groaned as he came. Pushing into you to make sure not a drop was wasted.

Mortarion laid back in the grass under the willow, you rested on his chest as his cock slipped out. You were both spent. But very satisfied.

“I love you Mortarion.” You yawned quietly.

He smiled, it was genuine and warm and he’d never smiled like it before, it felt good to smile that way.

“I love you too, Honeybee.”

#warhammer 40k #warhammer #primarch x reader #40k #my writing #primarchs #warhammer 40k x reader #fanfiction #primarch #mortarion #mortarion x reader #mating press march

[sparkles-and-trash]

dabihawks post war drabble ~

Healing quirks and mordern medicin can work so many wonders.

With time so much of Touya’s body heals. His skin, his nerves, his eyes, his lungs.

But not his voice.

At first they suspect it’s a trauma response, which wouldn’t be unheard of considering what he went trough, but after a while it became clear that it wasn’t that he didn’t want to, he simply… couldn’t.

His vocal cords were fried beyond anything the doctors had seen before, and somehow nothing seemed to help.

Not that he was particularly interested in talking to anyone at first, either.

For once in his life he was okay with being the one to listen. It’s easier not having to think of responses to all of his family’s emotional talks like this.

After a while, Shouto finally convince him to start learning to sign with his hands, but only if he promises to keep it a secret until he’s got the hang of it.

He’s not ready to let anyone else see him fumble yet.

It takes a long time, and lots of Touya tossing the cards on the ground while pouting and huffing while Shouto patiently picks them up again, but in the end he finally got it.

He didn’t love using it, mostly because of some issues with his hands, but it was nice to have the option, and it had proved to be a great bonding experience with that strange little brother of his.

It takes a while for him to run into Hawks again after everything, but when he does, Touya finds himself truly missing his voice for the first time since he woke up.

There so much he wants to say, to yell, to ask, and yet, all he can do is stare.

They’re in a coffee shop, off all places, and there’s a like behind them, and Touya just points at a table like a stupid person, but thankfully Hawks gets it.

When they sit down Touya finds a napkin to quickly give Hawks an idea of why he’s not talking, and Hawks has the decency to look… relived?

Okay, to be fair, Touya kinda gets it, but damn.

No manners on that bird.

After a few moments of silence, Hawks finally starts talking.

He hasn’t been doing as much of it as he used to either, after the war. He wouldn’t know where to turn, who to share the things he’s been grappling with.

But here, now, sitting opposite this person that’s meant so many different things to him, it’s like all of it just… flows.

Even if Hawks is the only one using his voice, the conversation is not a one-sided one.

Hawks was always good a t reading people, and Touya is more than expressive enough for them to be able to have a full conversation like this.

It’s strangly natural for both of them, for such an unnatural situation.

And so it goes, for a while.

They meet up, always at a neutral location, never at either of theirs homes, and they learn to know each other, and themselves, all over again.

Hawks doesn’t tell Touya, but he’s getting secret sign language lessions from Shouto, and it’s going really well.

Having the «what intentions do you have with my brother» talk with a 17 year old, but Hawks presevers.

He sits on the knowledge for a while, it’s not like they’re having much communication issues as is, but it’s hard not to show off his new skills.

But the waiting is worth it when he gets to see the look on Touya’s face when he finally gets to use it to sign the simple sentence he’s been perfecting for weeks now.

Touya finally let Hawks walk him back to his apartment that night, and they’re about to go their separate ways when Hawks gently grabs his wrist and takes a deep breat before he signs;

«Can I kiss you?»

He barley gets to finish showing off before Touya grabs the collar of his coat and kisses him, but he tries not to be salty about that, which is a lot easier when he’s finally kissing the man that’s been haunting his heart for so long.

Finally.

#dabihawks #dabi #hawks #toukei #Dabi x Hawks #Hawks x Dabi #Keigo takami #touya todoroki #Touya x Keigo #Keigo x Touya #hotwings #mha #bnha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia