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#the only thing I even have on the blog I got this on
fairuzfan · 2 days
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I think like there's such a transparent lack of sympathy for Palestinians that you start to care about October 7th and you don't even question what life was like for Gazans before October 7th like you guys are so racist you only cared about gaza and hamas when you got affected or you FEEL like you got affected in some cases. Like you never had the same level of outrage or anger towards 'israel' that you do hamas despite the siege lasting for 15+ years and Palestinians regularly lost their lives and jobs and futures and were imprisoned on literal terrorism charges for donating to Palestinians. Online isn't everything I didn't talk about Palestine on this blog much but I'm so so exhausted after more than 6 months of being online seeing news of massacres after massacre and then zionists on here and on Twitter and Instagram and threads (???? Why is threads even relevant????) talking about how BDS sucks and how they hate hamas and how they think Palestinians are overreacting and lying about their death tolls or trying to link antisemitism to Palestinians as an intrinsic value they hold or something the Free Palestine movement is about. I even feel guilty for saying this because what's that compared to experiencing those terrible things like being starved and killed firsthand but like idk. Some of you are just so cruel. None of you willing to see you have a direct impact to how Palestinians are being treated in Gaza. Idk it's just bugging me more than usual tonight.
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maximoffcarter · 3 days
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Is it over?
Pairings: Emily Prentiss x reader.
Summary: Set on 6x18: Lauren. If the team noticed Emily acting weird, they didn’t say anything about it. For the last two weeks, Emily had been acting strange, kind of off which was weird about Emily. Reader was the lucky person who could say that she knew Emily more than anyone else in the team, but this time...she was not sure about it anymore.
A/n: So...just like when I asked when I posted my first Calex fic; is my blog gonna turn into Marvel, SVU and Criminal Minds? Maybe so🫢 I'm obsessed with criminal minds right now (yes, a bit late, I've seen some of it before but I've always been an svu girly) and I am deeply in love with Emily (not new that I found Paget Brewster gorgeous😮‍💨). Anywayyyy, first Emily fic✨ Yes…I’ll be taking requests🫢 I dunno if some things are accurate or not so bear with me but hope you enjoy this, leave comments, hearts, whatever you like and reblog so this gets some love🫶🏻
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*not my gif*
If the team noticed Emily acting weird, they didn’t say anything about it. For the last two weeks, Emily had been acting strange, kind of off which was weird about Emily. Every once in a while, she’d crack a joke or even make fun of Morgan or Reid or anyone on the team, but nothing had been done. The cases they’ve had had been a bit of a pain, which could possibly be the reason why Emily had been acting so weird. Garcia was the first one to really say something to Emily, she had been teasing and trying to get information in case she had a secret boyfriend for the times she had been late to work, but Emily had stopped her from keep going and they just forgot about it for that moment. Reid then had asked her if she was okay and Emily had said that she was, even if she had started picking on her nails again and it was something that Reid had noticed she did when she was stressed, but again, Emily brushed it off.
The only person who could truly see Emily off work was Agent Y/n Carter, the one person that was the closest to Emily, who had always been there with Emily and for Emily, the one person that could really say that she knew more about Emily than anyone in the BAU. What they didn’t know is that y/n was not only the closest person to Emily in a friendly way, but they had been dating for the last year. No, it’s not that they didn’t trust the team, they loved them, they would do anything for them, but if they said anything about their relationship, which meant that there was a chance that they could be used against each other in case they got threatened or were hostages -which of course they hoped it never happened-. But they still wanted to keep the secret to themselves for as long as possible, and either way, they were able to enjoy it and have a relationship for them and only them.
“Hey, P! Leaving now, you need a ride?” Y/n walked to Penelope’s room and offered a smile.
“Ah, no sweet cheeks. Car is fixed, I’m driving myself now.” Penelope smiled as she grabbed her things.
Y/n nodded. “See you tomorrow then.” She was about to leave before she was stopped by Penelope’s voice.
“Hey honey?” Penelope asked softly.
Y/n turned to look at her and smiled. “Yeah?”
“Have you uh…have you talked to Emily?”
Y/n furrowed her brows as she stared at Penelope. “Uh…I mean…she was mostly with Morgan in the case so…not really. Why? Something wrong?” She tilted her head as she walked back to Penelope.
“I just…I’ve noticed that she’s been acting a bit odd.” Penelope shrugged. “I even asked her if she was preggo.” She chuckled.
Y/n chuckled softly as she shook her head. “Do we even know if she’s got a boyfriend?”
 “Well, she brushed it off when I mentioned it, but…you know…she’s been late these past few days and that’s not common of her.”
Y/n nodded softly and offered a smile. “I’ll try to talk to her tomorrow when I see her. But I’m sure she’s okay, P. Just…maybe stressed.”
Penelope nodded and smiled. “She trusts you more than she trusts anyone here, honey. I’m sure she’ll let you know if somethings going on.”
“I know.” Y/n smiled. “Night love.”
“Goodnight pretty girl!”
Y/n walked to the elevator and sighed softly as the doors closed. They had been busy with the last few cases that she hadn’t really paid any attention to Emily’s attitude or behaviour, which now that she thought about it, was really wrong of her, and she felt bad about it. As she got in her car, she decided to make a few stops before she stopped by Emily’s apartment. The whole ride, she thought of what exactly she was going to tell Emily, because she knew better than to get to her and be all like ‘oh you’ve been acting weird so I thought I could come and figure out what’s wrong with you’. As much as Emily loved y/n, Emily was not exactly an open book. She finally got to Emily’s apartment and decided it was better to use her key instead of knocking on the door. She walked inside the apartment and was greeted by Sergio, she closed the door softly and as she turned, she found Emily walking out of her room with her gun in hand.
“Woah, Em! It’s me!” Y/n raised her hands as she looked at Emily.
Emily sighed heavily as she put her fun on the back of her jeans and walked to y/n. “What are you doing here?”
Y/n cleared her throat. “Uh…” she looked down at her hands and had a bag of desserts and in the other hand, she had flowers. “I uh…well…I’ve noticed that you haven’t been yourself, I thought you were tired and exhausted, so I decided to…bring something.” She offered a shy smile as she looked at Emily.
Emily’s heart warmed as she stared at y/n, smiling softly as she walked to her, grabbing the flowers, and smelling them. “They smell wonderful.” She looked up at y/n and smiled. “Thank you.”
“Anything for you.” Y/n leaned in and pecked her lips softly. “I also brought your favorite.” She smiled.
Emily chuckled softly as she nodded. “Thank you.” She walked to the kitchen and took a deep breath. She grabbed a vase to put the flowers in and filled it with water. She hated that she had to tell y/n that she couldn’t stay, all she wanted was to be held and to have y/n with her, but she couldn’t put her at risk.
The thing was her nemesis was in the city. Just a few hours ago, she had met with the person she never thought she’d ever see again, the person that she had left in her past and that had been nothing but another case for her. Ian Doyle was looking for her, and she had now put everyone at risk, and the last thing she needed, was for Ian to find out that y/n was more than just a friend and a colleague, he had no idea about her, he thought that the most important thing for Emily was her life, and the team was her family, so in a way, y/n was still very much at risk, but at least he had no idea that she was more than just a friend.
Emily walked back to the dining room and smiled at y/n. “I’m sorry…I hate to do this but I just…” she sighed. “I think I’m getting that flu that Garcia’s been talking about.” She huffed a chuckle as she stared at y/n.
Y/n tilted her head as she pouted. “So you want me to go?”
Emily smiled sadly. “I’m afraid you’ll catch it, and it’ll be a fun thing to explain to the rest of the team why we both have it.” She grinned.
Y/n rolled her eyes playfully and nodded. “I guess you’re right.” She sighed as she stared at Emily, walking to her. “Em…are you okay?”
“I am.” Emily smiled.
Y/n squinted her eyes and raised her brow. “You’re not getting tired of me, are you?”
Emily felt her heart sinking as she stared at her girlfriend. She smiled softly and walked to her, wrapping her arms around her shoulders, and resting her forehead against hers. “I love you too much to do that.” She whispered softly as she smiled.
Y/n smiled widely as she wrapped her arms around her waist. “I love you too.” She furrowed her brows. “You’re really getting sick, Prentiss. You’d have joked about it.”
Emily shrugged. “I also like to tell you that I love you, because I really do.” She smiled softly, leaning in, and kissing her lips softly.
Y/n smiled against her lips and held her as close as possible. “Thought you didn’t want to give me the flu.” She whispered against her lips once they pulled away.
“A kiss won’t hurt.” Emily chuckled softly as she looked at y/n. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
Y/n nodded. “Sure will.” She smiled. “Save me my dessert, I’ll come eat it when you feel better.” She grinned as she walked to the door, she petted Sergio before she finally left.
Emily sighed again and felt her eyes getting watery. She hated that she had to do this, she hated that she was pushing the one person she trusted with her whole heart…but again…that sounded pretty hypocrite since y/n had no idea about her past with Ian Doyle. No one could know. She preferred to lie about it than put them more at risk.
********************
Y/n stretched as she got up from bed and yawned. After the exhausting days that they’ve had at the BAU, she had returned home and gotten herself in bed, trying to get herself to get some rest before whatever event was going to happen the next day. But right at two am, there had been a knock on her door, which woke her from her beauty sleep. She walked to the door and looked into the small hole, furrowing her brows as she noticed Emily standing right in front of the door. She opened the door and smiled sleepily.
“You lost your key again?” Y/n raised her brows as she stared at Emily.
Emily smiled softly. “I forgot it at home.”
Y/n nodded. “And you forgot your keys too?”
“I just wanted to see you.” Emily said softly.
Y/n furrowed her brows but said nothing, grabbing Emily’s hand and pulling her inside the apartment, closing the door behind her. “What’s going on, Em?” She said softly.
Emily took a deep breath as she shook her head. “I’ve just been having a hard time sleeping.”
“Then stay here with me.”
“I can’t.” Emily sighed softly. “Sergio…he’s been a pain in the ass. He hates that I leave him alone.”
Y/n grinned softly. “I’m gonna start to be jealous of him, getting all your attention.”
Emily rolled her eyes playfully. She then cupped y/n’s face in her hands, bringing their lips into a sweet and tender kiss. Emily could feel her eyes getting teary, but she stayed close to y/n and kept kissing her softly. Y/n wrapped her arms around Emily, her hands going up and down her back, her fingertips delicately touching her as she kissed Emily back. Even if Emily had this tough, bad girl persona, everyone knew that Emily had a soft spot because she was also a complete nerd, and y/n was lucky enough to say that she was able to experience it. They both pulled away slowly, resting their foreheads against each other’s, smiling softly.
“You know I love you, right?” Emily said softly, smiling at y/n.
“I know.” Y/n pulled away to look into her beautiful brown eyes as she nodded. “And I love you. A lot.” She whispered softly as she kissed her nose softly.
Emily smiled as she ran her fingers through her hair. “This whole stress will end soon.”
Y/n furrowed her brows slightly but nodded. “It will. Maybe you should consider what Rossi said about taking a vacation.” She grinned softly.
Emily chuckled softly as she nodded. “Go somewhere far away from here, no cellphones or technology…just us.”
“Well, he meant only for you.” Y/n teased.
“But I’d take you with me.” Emily smiled lovingly as her other hand stroked her cheek. “I want you with me.”
“And I’ll always be here, Em.” Y/n smiled as she leaned in to kiss her lips again. “Always.”
Emily nodded softly as she kissed her lips again, smiling sadly. “Hey uh…” she reached on her pocket and smiled softly down at her hands. “I got you something.” She looked back at y/n.
Y/n furrowed her brows and tried to look at what Emily had in her hands. “What is it?” She grinned softly.
Emily smiled softly and then opened her hand to show y/n what she had in hands, raising her brow softly. “You always mention you like it.”
Y/n’s lips parted and soon after turned into a smile, looking back up at Emily. “Em…you…you wear this necklace more than anything.”
Emily chuckled softly as she grabbed the heraldic rose pendant and moved behind y/n. She moved y/n’s hair to the side and placed the necklace delicately. “You always mentioned how you liked it…loved it, actually. And I thought maybe you should have it.” She smiled softly as she leaned down to kiss her shoulder. “It’ll look better on you anyway.” She then moved back to face y/n.
Y/n looked down at it and smiled softly. “I do love it.” She looked back at Emily as she held it. “Em-“
“Consider it an early birthday gift.” Emily grinned.
“Still two months to go, though.” Y/n raised her brow as she grinned.
“I like spoiling you, and you know it.” Emily smiled as she wrapped her arms around her and kissed her lips softly. “I gotta go, it’s late.” She whispered softly as she stared at her.
“And Sergio is gonna kill you.” Y/n grinned playfully.
Emily chuckled as she nodded. “Yes.” She looked into y/n’s eyes and smiled, leaning in to kiss her forehead softly. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow.” Y/n smiled.
Y/n stared at her until Emily closed the door and then she was gone, her hands still in the necklace. She sighed softly as she locked the door, her mind spinning as thoughts started to cloud her whole mind. There was something going on, but y/n couldn’t figure out what it was. Emily was definitely not herself, but if she pushed, Emily would only brush it off and she’d say nothing was going on, but the more she focused on Emily, the more worried she was about her. But she was right, this would soon end, and they would be able to go back to their lives.
********************
The whole time they were at the BAU, y/n kept an eye on Emily, trying to focus on what Hotch and the rest of the team was saying about this whole case, but she couldn’t help but see every move that Emily made. She was quieter than usual, which was not normal of her, she always had so much to say about the cases, y/n always found Emily being the best profiler in the team, of course they had their own thing, and she didn’t just think about it because she was her girlfriend, but she truly admired Emily so much, it surprised her when Emily gave her attention and actually wanted to be with her, even with the slight age difference, Emily still had her eyes on y/n. So yes, y/n knew Emily better than anyone in that room, but lately, it seemed like what she knew meant nothing.
Once Emily and Derek were back, y/n couldn’t help but keep her eyes on Emily, but this time, her full attention was on her. Every reaction, every movement, every facial expression, she was trying to get anything she could. As they continued to talk about the case, y/n noticed the way Emily became more tense about it and the way she kept fidgeting with her hands. Before anything else could happen, once the team was a bit more distracted, y/n pulled Emily with her and pulled them inside the bathroom, locking the door behind her.
“What are you doing?” Emily asked, brows furrowed as she stared at y/n.
Y/n crossed her arms as she looked at Emily. “What is going on, Emily?”
Emily shook her head. “I don’t-“
“You do know.” Y/n said, trying not to sound upset or worried. “Emily, I can see the way you’re acting. You never get to work late, even when we have spent the night together. You have barely eaten anything, you’ve barely been sleeping, I can notice. You haven’t been yourself, Em.”
“Baby…I don’t really wanna talk about it.” Emily rubbed her hand on her face as she looked down at the floor.
Y/n shook her head. “I know you don’t. But Emily…you’re not okay. I can tell. I’m here, why won’t you talk to me?” She walked close to Emily and placed her hands on her shoulders, sliding them down to grab her hands. “Please. I’m worried about you, Em.” She whispered softly.
Emily shook her head. “I just…” she sighed as she looked back at y/n. “…I’ve been having these nightmares, I’m exhausted. I want this to end. I need it to end.” She felt her eyes getting teary as her hands landed on y/n’s cheeks, stroking them softly. “I’ll be okay.”
Y/n shook her head as she sighed, wrapping her arms around Emily’s waist. “I’ll stop pushing…but Em, seriously…I’m here.” She looked into her eyes as she smiled. “Come to me. Talk to me.” She whispered softly.
Emily nodded as she leaned down to kiss her lips. “I love you.” She whispered softly against her lips.
Y/n smiled softly. “I love you too.” She kissed her nose softly and then her lips again.
Emily sighed as she pulled away and smiled softly. “We should get back.”
Y/n only nodded and then walked out of the bathroom with Emily, making sure that no one had seen them. As they went back with the rest, y/n still had her attention on Emily but said nothing more. As for Emily, she knew that sooner or later, y/n would figure out what was going on, the whole team would figure it out and there was nothing that would stop them, so she had to act fast. Things were only getting worse, more people were dying, and it was on Emily, and the thought of it was eating her alive. If she didn’t do anything now, he’d soon get to all of them. He’d get to y/n.
********************
Y/n furrowed her brows as she walked around the halls, looking around. After they had mentioned the profile of Ian Doyle, they had gathered around to make a plan and see where they could go next and that’s when she noticed that Emily was nowhere to be found. She saw her once she arrived back with Morgan, she had a worried look, her face had entirely changed and y/n was sure this had something to do with this whole thing, but if she pushed, she knew that she wouldn’t get anything anyway. Once Hotch dismissed everyone, that’s when she noticed she was gone. What was she doing?
“Guys, I cannot find Emily anywhere.” Y/n walked to them and stared at all of them. “What?”
Rossi sighed. “We believe Emily is involved with this case.”
Y/n furrowed her brows. “What?” She shook her head. “No…she would’ve said something. What do you mean involved?”
“Years ago, she was undercover. Weeks ago, she mentioned a name, Lauren Reynolds. Saying she was gone. I believe that was her undercover name.”
Y/n felt dizzy for a moment as she stared at them, not sure what was going on. Emily would’ve told her the truth, as much as she had wanted to protect them, she wouldn’t have lied to her. But she did…that’s why she had been acting weird, she had been pushing her away, she didn’t even let her stay at her apartment. That visit at two a.m., the necklace, Emily repeatedly telling her that she loved her…Emily was hiding it so y/n wouldn’t find out. Emily was a hopeless romantic, that was not a secret, but the way she had been acting, the way she had spoken to y/n…it all made sense now. She was trying to protect her, Ian was after them, and Emily was going to deal with this alone.
It was like her body was acting on its own once they moved to review the information JJ had. She didn’t even know when JJ had arrived, but she was there, she was there to help with the case. Y/n only sat there and tried to focus on everything about which they were talking. Emily had been undercover…she had been one of Ian’s lovers…his lover. She had been involved with him and she was one of the reasons he had ended up behind bars. She had never actually asked much about Emily’s past jobs, Emily always told her about her life, she knew the nerd she was, the silly movies she loved to watch, the books she read, she knew her routine in the morning and at night, what annoyed her and what she liked. She knew Emily. Right? She knew her, she just…didn’t know this part. Emily trusted her. Or maybe not.
“Carter…did you know about this?” Derek snapped as he looked back at y/n, making her snap out of her trance.
Y/n furrowed her brows as she stared at him. “W-What?”
“You’re the closest to Emily. You spend more time with her than with any of us. Did she tell you any of this?” Derek stood up and kept his eyes fixated on y/n.
“Derek…no. I had no idea…I-“
“Please.” Derek scoffed. “You always say it, you know more about Emily than any of us. Why should I believe that you didn’t know any of this?”
“Morgan.” Hotch warned as he stared at him.
“No!” Derek looked at everyone and then went back to y/n. “You and Emily have been hiding this from us for days. She’s now on the run and we have no idea where she could be. So enlighten us, Carter. Tell us where she is so this ends now.”
Y/n stood up from her seat, feeling anger growing in the pit of her stomach. “I have no idea…where she is, Morgan.” She felt her eyes getting teary as she stared at him. “I didn’t know anything about this. She never told me. Trust me, I’m not stupid. If I knew where she was, I wouldn’t be sitting here listening to your crap. I wouldn’t have let her leave. You were the last one with her, what did she tell you?”
“She said nothing. Because she doesn’t trust us. Apparently, you included.” Derek snapped.
“That’s enough.” Rossi said as he stared at both of them.
“Why should I believe you? Why should I believe that you’re not covering for Emily? You’re best friends. You two are literally glued to each other, and you want me to believe that you’re not hiding anything from us? Emily put you up to this, but this has to end now, Carter!” Derek yelled as he walked to Carter. “You’re the person she trusted the most, huh? If she’s your best friend, then you’ll tell us whe-“
“She was more than my best friend! I love her!” Y/n snapped as tears rolled down her cheeks as she stared at Derek. She sobbed softly as she took a step back, feeling everyone’s eyes on her. She looked down at the floor as she shook her head. “We’ve…we’ve been dating for a whole year…we didn’t say anything because…we didn’t want anyone to use us against each other in case something went south on a case.” She said between sobs. “She didn’t tell me anything, Morgan.” She looked back up at him. “You’re right. Maybe she didn’t trust me. Maybe she just wanted to protect me. I don’t even know what to think. I don’t know what’s going on. So please…back off, and let’s focus on finding Emily.”
Everyone in the room said nothing more about the subject, Rossi and Morgan decided to go to Emily’s apartment and y/n went over her bag and handed them the key, staring at Morgan as she did and then leaving the room. She could’ve offered to go with them, she could’ve said that she would be the one going, but she knew that if she did, she wouldn’t want to leave, and she was now a bit afraid of what she might find there. She wasn’t upset…she wasn’t mad…at least not at the moment, she was just…confused.
********************
Y/n felt like she was numb at that point, only focusing on what they had to say about the case and following them around, barely saying anything. She was hoping that she’d wake up from this nightmare, that maybe, just maybe, everything was in her head, that she was actually asleep, and this would end soon. For a moment, she tried to go and clear her mind for a bit, deciding that Penelope could help at least a little bit, but as she walked to her office, she heard her talking and then she figured out what she was doing. She tried to swallow back her tears as she walked to her, offering a small as she turned on her chair.
“Hey, sweet girl.” Penelope said softly as she offered a small smile.
“Hi.” Y/n smiled softly and crossed her arms. “So…we figured out if Emily had a boyfriend, huh?” She chuckled softly.
Penelope nodded as she smiled. “I always thought you guys looked cute. I’m happy you’re actually a couple.”
Y/n smiled softly as she nodded. “Thanks.” She cleared her throat. “Any luck with the phone numbers?”
Penelope shook her head. “No…I’ve left a message in all of them.”
Y/n nodded as she sighed. “Do you think I could uh…could you…give me at least one to try it out?”
Penelope smiled as she turned her chair and wrote down one of the phone numbers, and then turned to look at y/n, handing her the post it. “I just tried this one, is the last one I found.”
Y/n grabbed it and stared at it for a moment, smiling softly as she looked back at Penelope. “Thanks, P.” She nodded before she left.
Y/n looked around the hallway and noticed no one was there, so she for her phone out and dialed the number. She bit her lip softly as she waited, part of her hoping that she’d answer and the other part just waiting to be sent to voicemail. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath as she heard the voicemail tone. “Hey Em…it’s me, y/n. Uh…Penelope gave me this number, we’re not even sure if you have it anymore or not…” she huffed a chuckle. “…I don’t even know what to say. I just want you to know that…I love you. I won’t ever stop doing that.” She sniffled, biting her lip softly as she tried to swallow back her sobs. “Just come back, Emily…please. We can fix this together. I just need you back with me.” She let out sobs as she looked shook her head. “Come back to me.” She sighed as she ended the voicemail and closed her phone, putting it back in her pocket.
Emily sighed as she closed her eyes for a moment. She was exhausted, she was tired, she wanted this whole thing to end, and the worst thing about this, was that she had no idea how this would end. She wanted to cry, she wanted to scream, she felt helpless but she knew she had a reason and purpose, she needed to put an end to this; he wasn’t going to win, not as long as Emily could stop him. She looked down at her phone and furrowed her brows as she noticed two voicemails. Her heart stopped for a second as she heard Penelope’s voice, her eyes getting teary. She hated so much that she was doing this to them, she knew maybe they’d hate her, but she was doing this for them.
She opened the last voicemail and she felt her heart sank, for a moment, her whole world had stopped. It was y/n. She was sure Penelope had given her the phone number. She closed her eyes as she felt l tears rolling down her cheeks. She never meant to hurt y/n like this, she never wanted to lie to her, she never meant to hide this from them, but she thought she’d be able to live with it and that nothing would ever happen, he’d stay in jail forever and no one in her life would know about it. But she was wrong. And she hated it. She wanted to drive back to her lover, hold her and kiss her, but she had to protect her, she had to protect her family.
“I love you…I’m sorry.” Emily whispered softly before she turned off her phone and took a deep breath.
********************
The whole ride to the Warehouse, y/n tried to keep her head clear, thinking that they would be able to find Emily and that this whole thing would finally end, that she’d be able to bring her home and both of them would work on this together. For a moment, as she heard more and more about Emily’s undercover and Ian, she felt herself getting angry at the whole situation. It was clear everyone was upset at the thought of Emily getting involved with someone like him, and she was not gonna lie, it upset her too, but then all she could think about was Emily; was she okay? Was she safe? Y/n knew Emily was a fighter, she could protect herself, but what if Ian had hurt her badly? She couldn’t help the negative thoughts that filled her mind. She grabbed onto her necklace and kissed it, trying to swallow back her tears. She flinched a bit as she felt a hand on her shoulder, and she turned to look at Derek, who offered a small smile.
Y/n decided she’d go in with Derek, she followed them around and her heart started racing as she walked through the warehouse. For a moment, she tried to think that this was just another victim, she wanted to try to concentrate the best she could and not lose her posture. She could almost hear Strauss yelling at her for getting involved even though she knew she should’ve stayed behind. When the lights went out, she felt like she was in a nightmare, following Derek as she kept looking around us, making sure to not miss any door or room. At some point, Derek told y/n to go first to have her back, and just as she walked into the very end of the warehouse, her heart dropped at the sight of Emily on the floor…bleeding.
“Emily!” Y/n dropped to her knees and placed her gun on the floor. “Derek, call an ambulance!” She placed her hand on Emily’s and looked at her, tears rolling down her cheeks. “Emily? Em…please answer me. I’m here.” She said almost in a whisper.
Emily opened her eyes weakly and stared back at y/n. “Y/n?” She whispered weakly.
Y/n nodded and smiled through her tears. “Yes. It’s me. I’m here.” She placed her hand on Emily’s cheek, stroking it softly. “C’mon, baby. I need you to stay with me, help is coming.”
Emily’s breathing was weak, she tried to keep her eyes opened to look at her lover, but it was becoming harder. “Love…I’m…msorry.”
“Help! Please!” Y/n turned to look at Derek with tears in her eyes and then went back to Emily. “No, Em. I know why you did this. I love you, okay? I’m not mad, I’m not upset. I’m here. Just please, please stay with me. I need you, my love. Please.” She cried out as she leaned down to kiss her forehead. “Please, Em…”
“I…love you.” Emily breathed out and closed her eyes.
“Emily! Please! Hurry up!” Y/n looked down at her and sobbed. “Emily!”
The time stopped as y/n kept yelling Emily’s name, and as she felt Derek’s hands on her trying to pull her back, y/n kept yelling and trying to get away from Derek. The paramedics arrived and were all over Emily, y/n could only feel Derek’s arms wrapped around her trying to stop her from moving, and y/n could not do anything else than let herself cry and scream in Derek’s arms. This was not happening. This was not supposed to happen. At some point she felt Derek picking her up and helping her walk so they could follow the ambulance, y/n was sobbing uncontrollably so they didn’t let her go in the ambulance with her.
The whole way to the hospital seemed like a movie, y/n felt like she was not there, she was just numb, and she had gone completely quiet. She could feel JJ and Derek holding her, but she only sat there, her eyes glued to the ambulance in front of them. And then, as if she had transported, she was in the visitors lounge with the whole team. She didn’t know when or how they had all arrived there, even Penelope. She had sat down alone, only staring down at her hands as she fidgeted with her fingers. She thought that she had ran out of tears because none were coming out of her eyes, she could feel her head throbbing, her eyes were swollen and her whole body was trembling. If this is a nightmare, just wake up. Wake up now. She kept repeating in her head over and over again. In the corner of her eye, she saw a figure moving, making her turn her face to find JJ and she stood up rapidly to walk to JJ.
“JJ?” Y/n asked in a whisper as she walked to her. She furrowed her brows when she didn’t say anything. “JJ…say something.” She made a pause and shook her head as there was still silence coming from JJ.
“No…” Penelope whispered softly, her voice breaking.
“Say something!” Y/n’s bottom lip trembled as she sobbed quietly. “Please…”
“She never made it off the table.” JJ said softly, but rapidly, as if she had pushed herself from saying those words.
Y/n felt her like time stopped once again as JJ’s words kept replying in her mind. She could hear Penelope and Spencer crying, she could hear them in the background, but all she could do was sit back down, just staring into nothing as her mind processed JJ’s words. She felt someone touching her shoulder, but she couldn’t make up the words that were coming out of their mouth, her mind had shut down entirely and her body couldn’t react. At some point she felt something wet on her face and she processed in her mind that she was crying and then her mind registered where she was. She looked up and found Penelope by her side, wrapping her arms around her and that’s when she felt her whole body giving up and she started sobbing again, screaming loudly as Penelope tightened her grip on her. She was living in the nightmare.
********************
“I really wish you would’ve told me, Em…I could’ve probably helped you.” Y/n whispered softly, tears rolling down her cheeks. “I miss you terribly.” She sobbed quietly.
“Y/n?” Derek asked softly as she stood beside her.
Y/n cleared her throat as she smiled sadly. “She gave me her necklace. The day before, she came to my apartment at two a.m. I guess she thought that…maybe if she went that late, maybe they wouldn’t be watching her or something.” She shrugged softly as she looked down at the grave. “She seemed so…worried but she was reassuring me that she was okay.” She huffed a chuckle. “I knew she was not, but I didn’t push. I let her have control. She kissed me and left.” She shook her head as more tears rolled down her cheeks. “I should’ve pushed.”
“We know she wouldn’t have told you anything anyway.” Derek sighed. “She wanted to protect us. Protect you.”
Y/n nodded. “I hate her for that.” She shook her head. “I should be upset that she didn’t tell me anything, that she got involved with him.” She sighed. “But I’m upset that she let this happen and I couldn’t be there to save her.”
Derek nodded. “We did what we could.”
Y/n looked up at Derek as she cried. “Did we?” She cried out.
Derek stared at her and wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her to him and kissing her forehead softly. “I’m sorry for how I spoke to you.”
“I forgive you.” Y/n whispered softly as she rested her head against his shoulder. “I’m sorry too.”
Derek shook his head. “We’re good, princess. And I’m here.”
Y/n nodded. “I know. I’m here too.” She sighed as she let more tears roll down her cheeks.
“So…wanna tell me how it all began?” Derek grinned as he looked down at y/n.
Y/n huffed a chuckle as she wiped her tears. “Wouldn’t you like to know.”
“I do too.”
Y/n turned to look at Penelope and smiled softly. “You’re still here.”
Penelope smiled through her tears. “I didn’t want to leave you, sweet cheeks.”
Y/n smiled as she extended her hand for Penelope to take it. She then looked back at the grave and smiled. “I think Emily would love for me to tell you guys about how it all started.” She nodded softly as she knelt down and sat on the grass, followed by Penelope and Derek.
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charliesgoodboy · 2 days
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haiiiii sweetheart :3 how r u doin tonight??
I wanted to request a Tom x fem reader where readers all innocent and small and Tom tries to win her over by fucking her >:3 like imagine a small girl dressed all cutesy in all pastel and then this big strong man just shows up and tries to win her over >.<
it’s fine if you can’t :)
have a great rest of your day / night sweetheart <3
𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐤𝐚𝐮𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐳
a female reader fic❤
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you were so cute.
he loved hanging around you, always looking down at you and taking in your attire and the way you carried about yourself he loved it..loved the way your frilly skirts would fit on your figure, loved the colorful hairclips in your hair, you make up sent him over the edge.
but for the love of all things you were so damn oblivious. how could you just prance around all willy nilly around him like that? bending over so easily, jumping up and down when you got excited..he loved when you were happy, and it made him happy! a little too much..
when you hugged him or hang onto him it was far too much, when you'd stop him in the middle of the street as your eyes beamed at the kittens you saw in the window. "tom! tom, can we get one? please, please, please?" your voice was high which he liked when it got higher when you were excited. your arms pulling him down, and his eyes would wonder to the way your breasts would smoosh together. "uh-huh.." he hadn't even registered he said yes before you were already pulling him into the shop. damn it
not only did he like your make up, but god he loved watching you do it..he didn't wear make up and had zero interest in it but now? now he did. the way your body leaned up on its tip toes to see closer into the mirror as you applied the eye liner, your fingers so smooth as they held the eye liner stick. he wanted nothing more than to fuck it all off of you, to let all the eye liner and pretty pink lip gloss to smear off your face.
he couldn't take it anymore! it was driving him nuts. 'oh he's my friend!' 'oh yeah this is my friend tom! i wanted you to meet him!' he was done with it. "hush babydoll and keep your ass up like i told you." his hips were causing the wet skin slapping, his dick pounding relentlessly into you. you were supposed to be going out with him but you had to choose an outfit you thought was adorable. it was a very pretty pair of shorts that rode up your ass when you did the simplest thing, a thin strap tank top in which made your chest pop out more, and multiple accessories littered across the outfit and your hair.
the spaghetti strap was falling off your shoulders, your fingers gripping on for dear life. your fingernails glistened with the cute soft colors painted with polish. "fuck..thought you could go out dressed like that with me?" what if someone was to try and steal you from him? someone trying to take you away, you were his no one else could just have you.
your cunt was hot and sticky as the feeling of his cock was all that imprented in your mind, you've never felt this before, no ones ever done this to you and it felt so weird! your body has never felt so tingly all over, he was so good with it. his hand would make way to the back of your throat, your eyes rolling back and you looked so lovely..like tom had wanted, your eye make up was running down your face, your lip gloss smeared and your cheeks puffy from tears, you were so cute.
you swore you could see stars and clouds, you felt tom pull out and you finally thought it was all over. but his hand would only reach over as your dumbfouned eyes followed and his hands would open the drawer pulling out a condom packet. "ah..wish you could see your face.." he chuckled as he tore open the top with his teeth. "you thought we were done, huh?"
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!!this was a draft before i changed my blog theme guys!! i have another fic coming soon
@tokio-motel @cherry-rawr @itsmealaiah @evieskiesss @20doozers
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Text
HICKEY — MINSUNG.
pairing: jisung x reader(afab) x minho genre: smut, NSFW warnings: established relationship (jisung x reader), biting, protected sex, oral (f and m receiving), piv, mxm, threesome, overstimulation, handjob, multiple orgasms, dry humping, cumming in pants, switch of dynamics a/n: reupload. old blog got suspended!
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it’s only been a couple of months since you and jisung started dating. jisung was shy most of the time, but he was not afraid to tell you about his needs and things he wanted to try next.
that is why you weren’t surprised, when during one of the make-out sessions jisung suddenly stopped, looked at you with pleading eyes and whispered. “can you give me a hickey?”
you laughed. “i’d love to, but i don’t know how to do it, ji.”
“ugh,” jisung whined. “fuck, i don’t know either. don’t you just need to suck my skin or bite it?”
“i can try,” you said, brushing your nose along his neck. he sighed deeply, his skin filling with goosebumps. “but i am scared that i am gonna hurt you.”
“what if… i ask minho to teach us.” jisung was not giving up.
you gave him a stare in return. there was no way your boyfriend just said that.
minho - the childhood friend. the guy everyone thought was jisung’s boyfriend, before you two started dating. of course, jisung trusted him. but you couldn’t even think that he trusted him that much.
your thighs trembled at the thought of having minho right here - on your bed. you’d lie if you said you weren’t charmed by his appearance. out of all jisung’s friends, he was catching your eye the most. his heart-shaped lips, big thighs, veiny hands…
“if you are uncomfortable with him specifically, it’s fine. we can-“
“okay,” you interrupted. “let’s ask him.”
there he was. sitting at the near end of the bed with the most irritated look on his face. you didn’t know how jisung even managed to get him here in the first place.
“are you guys serious? i am not participating in your sex games.”
“pleasee, minho, you can just show it on me once. i just wanna see how it is.” jisung whined, slowly scooping closer to his friend. you knew what he was doing - fluttering his lashes and furrowing eyebrows cutely - and it made you chuckle even louder. “nothing sexual, promise. we just don’t know who else to ask. plus you’ve always been bragging about your hookups, so i know that you are experienced.”
minho sighed, giving you and jisung another look. you smiled warmly, giving him a look of “i don’t know what’s going on too”, and jisung patted him on the shoulder.
“fine… but nothing more than that.”
jisung happily jumped, not hiding the excitement. it almost seemed like he wanted to feel minho’s lips on his skin more than yours. in a matter of seconds he was on his back, waiting for his best friend to crawl on top of him.
minho’s shyness disappeared like it was never there. he quickly got on top of jisung, making himself comfortable. the slight adjustment of his hips made your boyfriend suck in his breath. his lashes fluttered and you could see how hard it was for him to put his hands on minho’s thighs.
“okay, this is getting awkward.” jisung laughed, when minho’s face got closer to him.
“shut up for a second.” minho replied boldly, leaning closer to his best friend’s neck.
jisung hummed in response, leaning his head back to give better access to his neck. it felt like time had stopped, and everyone held their breath for a second.
the gray sweatpants minho was wearing hugged his legs in all right places. his muscular thighs were so big compared to jisung’s prominent small waist. sharp collarbones peeked out from under the collar of his t-shirt. he looked so sexy, especially on top of your boyfriend.
minho began to suck the skin harshly between his teeth, earning quiet whines from jisung.
the sloppy sounds of lips and saliva made your pussy throb. as much as you tried to, you couldn’t stay unaffected. the view in front of you was way too pornographic. as you saw jisung shut his eyes in ecstasy, you squeezed your thighs together, trying to do circular motions to relieve yourself. a million of lewd thoughts were already racing your mind, and minho just started. you didn’t know when exactly he would stop, but��you certainly didn’t want him to.
watching the lewd act happening in front of your eyes, you were physically resisting yourself from sliding your fingers in your panties to touch your throbbing pussy. instead you placed your hand on jisung’s thigh, slowly sliding up it.
“hey-hey, babe! stop now or i am gonna get hard for real!” jisung quickly protested, attempting to get up and push minho off. but he was so weak, so tiny under minho’s body. it made him squeak in surprise.
“i’m just speeding up the process…” you murmured, your hand traveling higher on his thigh.
minho paused and turned at you slowly, but you couldn’t pick up the emotion on his face. was he getting aroused as well?
“is that enough for you two? can i leave?” he sat up and cleared his throat, looking away in embarrassment.
“no no, can you show it on me as well, pleeease?” you didn’t wanna let him go so easily. not when you finally had a chance to have somewhat intimate contact with him. “i want to be sure that both of us understood how to do it.”
minho sighed and looked at the ceiling. you could tell he was battling with his inner self. but if you push him any more now, he’d just get annoyed and leave. so all you could do was beg and use jisung’s tricks.
“please?” you made puppy eyes. “pretty please?”
jisung was still laying on the bed, probably trying to calm down his erection, and looking at the scene unfolding in front of him.
minho sighed again and gave you the look that sent shivers down your spine.
“c’mon then, lay on your back.” he commanded, and you obeyed immediately.
jisung chuckled. he knew exactly what you were doing.
when minho crawled on top of you, you tried your best to stay calm. how could you not react to his presence? the warmth of his body was transferring to you, his cologne was all you could smell, and his plush thighs were hugging your hips so tightly, yet so comfortably.
your heart was racing so rapidly, you thought it was going to jump out of your chest. the heatwave from the bottom already reached your face, and all minho did was just sat on top of you.
you felt his warm breath on your neck and squeezed the sheets, eyes closed in anticipation. you’ve never had a hickey before, so your mind was tracing with thoughts, besides the lewd ones. will it hurt? will it be less enjoyable as you imagined? 
minho buried his face in your neck, trying to determine the best place to leave a mark. a surprised gasp left your mouth as you felt him licking the spot right below your ear.
right as you were about to push him away and tell him to stop messing around and licking you like a cat, he bit down. it surprised you more than it hurt but you still let out a gasp as your body tensed up. the bite quickly turned into him sucking and licking at the spot, causing your body to relax. reflexively, you tucked his hair at the back of his head.
this was the first time someone’s ever given you a hickey. it was so… weird? but felt good. you could feel yourself slowly getting wet under minho’s body.
once he finished with that spot, he pressed a small kiss on it before moving to another one by your throat and doing the same. it seemed like he wasn’t even planning on stopping. and neither you nor jisung had these plans either. you let out a sigh of relief when you felt teeth turn into tongue, gently massaging and soothing the pain.
as time went by, you began to squirm under minho’s body. you badly needed relief.
“fuck- don’t start something you can’t finish.” minho groaned on top of you.
“what if I want to start something?” you moved your head, trying to get a better look at him.
you would lie, if you said you didn’t notice that something had been poking your inner thigh for the past few minutes. something big… and pulsating. he was hard. painfully hard from all the kissing and body contact that happened between the three of you.
he could feel your tits pressing against his chest, and the heat between your legs was radiating through his sweats right onto his now rock-hard dick.
after another slight movement of minho’s hips, as he attempted to get up, you gave up and made a loud moan. minho paused. his hot, heavy breath was tickling your neck.
“i think… i should probably leave…”
you grabbed his hand just as he was about to move away from you.
minho’s ears were red; a flustered look on his face with a slight blush on his cheeks. he wouldn’t lie, he didn’t want to move away from you. he shouldn’t have been so turned on by this… you were his best friend’s girlfriend, and it should’ve felt at least a bit wrong to be this hard because of the thought of fucking you. however, rock-hard dick in his pants said otherwise.
not being able to resist any longer, you touched the throbbing bulge with one hand and rubbed small circles on minho’s tummy with the other.
minho whimpered and tightened his grip on your waist, that he has been holding.
“ohh, fuuuck…” he groaned. “ohh, shit that felt so good, fuck-”
you giggled and pressed your fingers into the fabric harder, as you kept grinding your hand on his bulge.
“fuuuck…” he hid his face in the crook of your neck. you could see his flushed crimson ears and his back moving up and down the more you played with him. “don’t make me cum in my pants.”
minho was whining and panting already and you barely touched him. you were already wet too, clit swollen and pulsating between your thighs, absolutely begging to be touched.
you turned your head at the deep groan coming from aside. jisung was looking between you two with an amused expression. you totally forgot that your boyfriend was still there.
“ji?”
“you two look fucking amazing,” he said. eyes dark, filled with lust.
he smiled at you tenderly, making sure you know that he is comfortable with where this is going, and leaned in for a kiss. his tongue went all over yours, reminding of how good of a kisser he actually is. the lewd sounds of exchanging saliva and little moans teemed around the room.
minho watched you two patiently, his eyes flickering from your locked lips to the ceiling, feeling a little shameful when his gaze darted back down to watch you both.
jisung’s tongue glided along your bottom lip, smiling against you as you parted your lips. as minho watched you both, he admittedly got even more turned on at the sight.
“you are literally laying on top of me with you hard dick poking my thigh. can you stop blushing?” a little chuckle escaped your lips. “cm’ere.”
you grabbed minho’s neck and yanked him down to kiss you. he squeaked in surprise, but was quick to let his tongue press into your mouth, pouty lips against yours. he did not expect that much boldness from you. weren’t you a virgin a few months ago?
keeping up with the confidence, you touched his bulge again. he moaned desperately against your lips, impatience running over him. the kiss quickly became sloppy and desperate.
“aAaH!” minho moaned into your mouth again and pulled away. “gosh, i am so hard, sorry. i am acting like a horny teenager.”
the way the blush covered his cheeks, voice trembled and his unusual cockiness got replaced by timidity made you feel even more desperate for him. he was so patient, so careful and scared to hurt you. you had to lead the way, otherwise he’d sit here forever, scared to touch you more than his morality let him.
suddenly, you felt a second pair of hands on you, pulling off your pants.
“ji?” you gasped in awe.
“you two are too slow.” he groaned, already halfway to fully striping you. “i can’t wait anymore.”
you chucked both in shock, embarrassment and arousal. it felt so different when jisung took control over you.
the next time you looked at minho, he was sitting in front you in his boxers only. your gaze went over his relief of muscles, abs and the scar on his stomach. he looked utterly angelic, and you suddenly felt like you weren't good enough to be in the same bed with two that good-looking men.
“hey- relax. you are sexy. and i love you. and we are both hard just from looking at you.” jisung immediately read your mood and placed a kiss on your temple. “okay?”
“okay-“ you nodded, a bit of shyness still remained in your voice.
with that jisung got rid of the last bits of clothing from both of you. now you were laying there with your tits out and wet pussy on display for both men to see.
“she’s gorgeous, isn’t see?” jisung proudly said, as if bragging to minho about how lucky he got with his girlfriend.
“mhm-“ minho could barely utter a word, his eyes fixed between your legs. he's slept with girls many times, he's already lost count; but something about you was so different. you scent, your skin, your pretty face and pussy was making him lose his breath.
“c’mon, eat her out.” jisung chuckled. “stop staring like a virgin.”
minho broke out from the trance and looked at jisung, giving him an almost death stare.
“just saying-“ your boyfriend threw hands in compliance. “c’mon-c’mon, before she becomes all shy again.”
there was no need to ask minho twice. the usual cockiness returned and he boldly placed himself before your legs. his veiny hands grabbed your plush thighs and he scooted you even closer to his face. you squeaked in surprise, face flushed again.
minho then started planting a series of kisses up your skin, slowly getting closer to your core. all you could feel was minho’s saliva all over you - it was on your neck, your thighs, your mouth, lips. you were throbbing just at the thought of that.
when you felt his breath tickling your folds, your back arched involuntarily. oh, you were so turned on.
“please- minho…” you pleaded between rapid pants.
you knew he was staring at you, but still looked down. his dark eyes immediately met with yours. he was waiting for you to look at him, watch as he made his first lick.
the sexual tension was unbearable. so when minho finally made a move with his tongue - sliding it along your whole pussy - you couldn’t resist and let out a loud moan.
“fUck-“ jisung was sitting next to you and stroking his own cock slowly, prolonging the pleasure. “i didn’t know you two would look so hot together-“
he was cut off by another moan coming from your mouth. minho started wrapping his lips around your clit, licking off your juices. he was switching between kitten licks and making out with your cunt. his tongue knew exactly what to do next to make you arch your back in pleasure. your hands gripped on his hair tightly and thighs put him in a lock, not letting him move away.
“i’m cumming!” you cried out, letting go of the knot in your lower stomach. the orgasm rushed over your body.
“already?!” jisung was astonished, taken aback by how quickly you reached your release. it definitely hurt his ego a little; he wondered what exactly minho did to make you cum so intensely.
minho just smiled smugly, feeling self-confident as he usually did. his chin was covered in your release, eyes still staring at you, ready to catch any sense of discomfort.
you closed your eyes in pleasure and that alone made him feel sure that you were still fine with everything that’s going on.
“can i… lick everything?” you heard minho ask jisung.
“just be careful, she’s usually very sensitive after cumming.” your boyfriend replied.
maybe in another situation you would’ve protested, said that you were actually so sensitive right now. but you were so out of breath, you couldn’t even form a word. and well… maybe you wanted to feel minho’s tongue again.
the first lick already made you flinch. your back arched and you mumbled a quiet: “minhooo- can’t! slow down-“
the man chuckled, but obeyed. his tongue started moving patiently, slowly and carefully collecting your juices. that actually helped minho in a good way - now he could extend this moment, taste you properly, enjoy your scent on his tongue.
“aAaAhH!” you cried out as you felt your walls starting to clench. “i think i’m gonna cum again, if you won’t stop-“
your thought your words would make minho pause… but he did the complete opposite - sped up his movements.
“minho! fuCK! i’m cumming!” yours screams of pleasure could be heard all over the room. you whined, moaned, pleaded. the sensations of overstimulation were so new, but when you finally came, it hit you harder than your first orgasm.
“holy shit-“ you breathed out. “i’m- i- i’m-“
minho just left you speechless and was laughing quietly and your reactions between your legs. how proud he was that he managed to make you cum twice, and so fast. in contrast, the look on jisung’s face became a lot more grumpier than before. he tried to overstimulate you before, but you always ended up begging him to stop. and when you didn’t, you couldn’t cum for the second time so fast and intensely.
while you were restoring your breath, you didn’t notice how the men between your legs changed. now it was jisung, who was looking at you pleasingly with his boba eyes.
“hi, baby…” he smiled. his hand caressed your thigh, fingers circling over hickeys that just started to form.
“hi…” you smiled sleepishly, still unaware of what was coming to you.
gradually, his hands followed by quick kisses reached your crotch.
“ji- what are you doing?” you squealed in surprise, closing your legs reflexively.
“wanna give me another one?” his bottom lip stuck out a bit as he pouted, hands slowly stroking the soft skin of your thighs. “wanna be as good as minho.”
the pleading expression on his face got you smiling tenderly.
“you wanna be as good as minho, baby?” you repeated, earning a series of nods from your boyfriend.
“wanna make you feel good too…”
your heart melted. it was impossible to resist, when he was all pouty and needy.
his desperation to eat you out again was hot. his desire to beat minho in this silent battle was hot.
and so you complied, even though you weren’t sure you could cum one more time.
“can i?” jisung inquired. his lips were millimeters away from your core, breath tickling your skin and making you arch towards in desperation.
you promptly nodded and interlocked your fingers in his soft hair, tugging them lightly. the exhaustion was running over your body, so you had to hold onto something.
minho, who’s been watching you and your boyfriend from aside, finally appeared in your sight. he laid on his stomach and gave you another smug look. that alone made your pussy clench. what could he possibly do next?
a sonorous gasp escaped you as his lips latched on of your nipple, tongue circling around it. you watched his mouth taking your nipple fully, before he started sucking like a starved man. his other thumb then went to your other already hard bud.
jisung between your legs did not waste much time either. with eyes closed, he was slowly licking you like a kitten, copying minho’s earlier movements.
jisung was even more patient than minho with his licks. he started far away from the clit, kitten licking his way up, but doing it extremely slow. occasionally, your body would jerk up, yet arousal started to build up. jisung looked and sounded desperate. with every move of his tongue he let out a soft sigh, grinding his hard-on into the mattress. his cheeks turned slightly pink, and that made you wonder what he was so embarrassed about? but soon you realized he was just enjoying it too much for his own liking, and that made him feel ashamed.
minho’s lips around your nipple mixed with jisung's overstimulation. it was giving you that amount of pleasure you didn’t even think you could feel.
at this point, you stopped caring about your loud moans and let go, ready to vocalize everything that’s on your mind.
“minho…” you looked at the man next to you, who was still glued to your nipple.
“mhm?” he hummed, not letting go of the flesh. his eyes were narrowed cutely, too focused on the task.
“can you bite me on the neck again? like you did before?” every word coming out of your mouth was interrupted by heavy pants.
this time you didn’t even feel that much discomfort from overstimulation. perhaps, jisung’s kitten licks were the perfect formula to make you aroused again in seconds.
minho let go of your nipple and widened his eyes. were you asking for too much?
pink blush slowly covered your cheeks and minho giggled, noticing your reaction. “you want another hickey?”
“please?”
he gave you an amused smile and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. the blush on your cheeks became deeper as he slowly got closer to your ear and whispered. "of course, kitten. since you're asking so well."
his breath was ticking yet comforting. starting from the jaw, he pressed a series of kisses down the neck. the feel of his saliva on your skin made you clench harder yet again. as previously, minho repeated the act of biting down and licking your skin afterwards. you got used to the feeling by now, but still couldn’t help but whine.
the hand that you were holding sheets with, went to the back of his head. the other was still tangled in jisung’s hair.
it felt like heaven. too many new sensations for one night, but you've never felt so good. all you could hear were lewd sounds under your ear and between your legs. so much saliva, fluids and moans... your moans.
minho’s kisses on your neck have moved to your lips. you didn't notice how his tongue began to explore your mouth. now your moans were muffled, but you didn't hesitate to continue doing so into his mouth.
the third orgasm hit you unexpectedly. you were sure it was the most intense one out of all of them. instead of moaning like usual, your breathing started to shake; back arched for a good ten seconds and you gripped on jisung’s hair almost making him cry out of pain.
both minho and jisung waited until your breathing restored to make sure you were still okay.
a pleasant tiredness spread through your body, you yawned sleepily and looked at jisung. he was still between your legs, as if he was glued there.
“was it good?” his pouty face was ready to receive praises.
“yes.” you nodded. “so good. thank you, baby.”
jisung smiled proudly. “another one?”
“another?” you questioned at first, but then realized what he meant. “no-no! no! i’m so tired.”
“but…” his puppy eyes were looking at you. “i wanna do that again…”
“ji… i came three times already. i can’t. i’m so fucking exhausted.” you closed your legs and tugged them closer to your chest, signalizing that you were really done. “you can go fuck each other and i’ll watch.”
minho's face next to you changed with a mixture of emotions and jisung choked on his spit. 
“babe-“
“what? i already told you i’m tired. and both of you are hard, so the only solution for you is to fuck each other.” you said as if it was the most normal thing.
minho couldn’t lie that his erection has been painfully pressing against the fabric of his boxers for so long. he already came one time, but it didn’t prevent him from getting hard again. somehow, he didn’t feel disgusted about his cum being in there. rather the opposite - it only made him harder.
you could see the stain on his boxers and reached out to press on his bulge, just to tease him a bit.
“you’re so hard.” you breathed out.
minho flinched, his hips jerked under your touch.
jisung’s eyes were glued to when you hand was, even though he was trying to avoid the thoughts that seeing the outline of minho’s dick only made him harder.
but the truth was… you definitely could go for another round. seeing both of them with their throbbing dicks made your mouth watery. and the exhaustion that you felt disappeared like it was never there. but you couldn’t let them know.
the whole plan appeared in your head, when you saw how intensity jisung was looking at minho’s bulge. and the looks that minho was giving to jisung this whole time just confirmed that he wouldn’t mind fucking jisung either. you just needed to act a bit.
the glances that minho and jisung exchanged were almost comedic. they avoided eye contact, looked surreptitiously, studying each other's facial expressions. jisung’s cheeks were burning, and minho’s ears were red at the tips.
“d-do y-you-“ jisung made an attempt first, but shuttered. he didn’t know how to approach this. what was he supposed to say?
you chuckled, looking at he both of them. “minho, do you want to blow him or-“
the man nodded, gaze instantly switching to jisung’s crotch.
jisung gulped heavily, feeling himself shiver in anticipation. there was no way his friend was about to suck him off. “how do you want me to-“
“sit on the bed, i will sit on the floor.” minho tried to sound confident, but his face showed that he had not fully accepted the situation yet.
even for him, a man who fucks with someone new every second day, this was a novelty. he sucked a guy off more than once, but he never thought that one of these times it would be one of his friends.
jisung sat down as he was told. uncertainly, he lowered his boxers, revealing a hard dick with a bunch of sperm on the head. same as minho, he came while eating you out, no matter how hard he tried not to.
when minho sat on the floor with his legs tucked under him, jisung almost choked on the sight. minho has never looked so submissive... and hot. his ears were still red, which jisung found incredibly cute. 
minho's eyes mesmerizingly studied his friend's cock. his mouth opened slightly, revealing bunny teeth. he took a whole minute to study every inch of skin he could, gaze traveling along the shaft in front of him. and then he finally took it in his hand, trying to adjust. jisung immediately groaned.
you stayed on the bed, allowing yourself to recover and enjoy the view.
minho’s veiny palm began to slowly jerk jisung’s chubby cock. starting at the tip, he ran his hand down, spreading the wetness along the shaft.
jisung made a plaintive moan. it was so lingering; the pace was too slow compared to how much he was turned on. if only it was you, he would interlock his hands in your hair and start bobbing your head on his cock. but since it was his first time feeling minho’s touch, he had to be patient.
inevitably, you gradually got wet just from watching them. you couldn't deny the fact that your boyfriend looked hot while being jerked off. he was occasionally looking at you from under half-closed eyelids, sweaty bangs tousled over his face, and chest occasionally heaved as he let out the most pitiful sobs you've ever heard. you shifted slightly in place, hand going between your legs, trying to remove the tension.
“ay! i see that!” jisung called you out immediately. minho stopped his hand movements and looked at you too. “you wanna join us, baby?”
“if only you keep your dick in his mouth.” you pointed at minho.
“but then how do we…” jisung was confused, but minho beside him smiled smugly. it looked like he had an idea in mind.
you've never tried something like this, let alone threesome. minho assured that he will be fine in this position and laid on the back, waiting for you two.
he licked his lips impatiently as he saw jisung standing on his knees above him.
“you sure?” he asked again and minho nodded.
meanwhile, you opened a condom and gave one to jisung, and put the other on minho’s dick.
jisung began first, slowly moving his cock closer to minho’s mouth. the direct eye contact coming from minho was making him shiver. 
minho waited patiently at first, but seeing how uncertain jisung was, he grabbing the dick with his own hand and brought it closer. you chuckled. these two could do just fine without you, even if they try to mask it.
jisung’s eyes closed with pleasure. he let out a soft "ah" and almost knelt down. the urge to cum was almost unbearable already. the warmth of minho’s mouth pleasantly framing his cock was enough for him.
slowly at first, minho began to move. the familiar gulp sounds filled the room. he was skilled, knew exactly how to control his breath and what to do with his tongue to give jisung maximum pleasure. which was not surprising, because you came twice in a few minutes under him.
you watched them with big eyes, completely forgetting that you also had a place to "sit down"; but you just couldn't look away - minho looked so hot with a dick in his mouth.
“c’mon, baby.” jisung panted. “wanna see you ride him.”
you grinned at your boyfriend. he was definitely enjoying what was happening. the embarrassment was long gone, and now he looked so hot and confident, admiring you under half-closed eyelids.
you positioned yourself on top of minho and took his dick in your hand, aligning it with the entrance. but before that, you slid the dick between your folds, collecting all the juices.
feeling your hand, minho choked on a dick in his mouth. he was so sensitive, even a slight stimulation of the head brought a lot of pleasant sensations. his hips jerked up, dick brushing against your core.
you couldn’t wait anymore. the walls were clenching around nothing, ready to be filled. your body was craving for a dick, especially when minho’s mouth in front of you was still full. it was delicious to look at. 
the feel of his dick sliding in was so good it made you whine loudly. 
“s-so good-“ minho pulled away for a second just to say that. his eyelashes were shuttering in pleasure. it must have felt incredible.
for a moment you felt jealous of him. you wanted to be stuffed like that too, feeling full from both sides. but you could leave these thoughts for another time.
jisung was barely holding on. he didn't want to cum, tried to slow down his thrusts in minho’s mouth. but the movements were happening reflexively - his body was craving for a release. if only he could stay in this moment forever, looking down at how minho's cheeks were puffing, how wet his lips were and how much his hair were disheveled; how his cock entered you perfectly, how your eyes closed in pleasure.
even through the condom, you could feel how minho’s dick was different from jisung’s - longer and less chubby.
the exhaustion from before was coming back. it was harder and harder for you to ride him. that's why you just circulated your hips and you sat on the dick fully. the feeling of fullness was incredible. you closed your eyes, trying to memorize the way minho felt inside you.
you didn't want it to end either, but you knew it was definitely your last one. you’ve never came so much, and you were sure your legs would be sore in the morning.
jisung’s breathing quickened, a sign that he was close. after making a few last thrusts into minho’s mouth, he came first, throwing his head back. minho stared at him the whole time, not even thinking about closing his eyes. he came right after, cock pulsing inside you. and you were the last one, feeling your walls shrink again from a familiar feeling. it was wonderful to cum on minho’s dick like that.
the three of you got comfy on the bed, breathing heavily. minho happened to be in the middle, and that allowed you to wrap your arms around his waist and twist your legs over him. jisung, on the other side, buried his nose in minho’s neck, ready to fall asleep immediately. the oval of his puffy cheeks was visible even over minho's chest. you smiled fondly at that. minho hugged both you and jisung by the waist, gently stroking the skin. 
the comfort silence fell in the room, only jisung's snoring remained. no one said anything, but there was no need.
the only thought left in your head was that you would definitely do it again many, many more times.
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Hummingbird Has Landed, ch 13
Marcus Pike x female reader Co-written with @absurdthirst
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After the debacle of his failed engagement and relocating to Washington to take charge of his task force, newly minted Special Agent Marcus Pike is ready to get back out into the dating pool once more. A slew of bad dates has him feeling a little down, and he takes an old friend up on an invitation to get away and get his head on straight. Imagine his surprise when he finds not only fresh air, but his soulmate as well - hiding in plain sight but in the unlikeliest of places.
Rating: M for Mature but this blog is always 18+ Word Count: 14.5k Warnings: *Blanket warnings for this series: occasional mention of American politics, pregnant character, food/alcohol consumption, mentions of clothing/regulated dressing for occasions, mentions of therapy because we believe in self care here, reader is in a previous relationship, love triangle, reader is mentioned as turning 30 during the course of the story, dom/sub dynamics* Shitty exes being shitty, anxiety, stress of confusion, attempted sabotage. A bit of dirty flirting in there for good measure. Summary: When you and Marcus stumble upon the perfect place for your engagement party, things get complicated by Sam's plans to rent the very same venue. Notes: I'm sure I missed some errors in the proofreading, but such is life. Please enjoy, my dears! Chapter photo from Monticello's website.
Ch1 ~ Ch 2 ~ Ch 3 ~ Ch 4 ~ Ch 5 ~ Ch 6 ~ Ch 7 ~ Ch 8 ~ Ch 9 ~ Ch 10 ~ Ch 11 ~ Ch 12
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The idea happened a bit by accident, but a few days after your goddaughter was born, once Sydney and Juan and Constance were comfortably and safely at home, Marcus had convinced you to take the last of your days off and go out to Monticello with him for some fresh air and historical tourism. The numerous tours and lunch at the café on the vast grounds are exactly the break that you need, and you're bent over the map together on the sunny grounds when you tilt your head and look up at him beside you.
"Ya know..." The idea is just a hum in the back of your throat. "I bet they're booked ages in advance to do events here...but it might be worth asking if they have an opening or a cancellation sometime soon."
"What are you thinking of having here?" He's not even arguing against the idea, just trying to get a feel for what you are starting to plan. "I don't think we can build our house here." He teases, having nearly gone cross eyed from going through house plans with you over the last two days.
"No, we're definitely not doing that." You roll your eyes playfully and nudge him. The work on the house is finally underway and now you've moved on to talking about decorating so it feels like square one of an entirely new project instead of just a new phase on a continuing one. "I was thinking it would be a hell of a place for an engagement party if they have an opening before Thanksgiving. But I doubt it."
Marcus contemplates it, looking around with his hands on his hips and hums. "I think it would be good." He agrees before glancing back at you with a smirk. "There's only one way to find out if they have any dates available." He teases. "We've got to ask."
"Gee, what a shocking idea." When you poke him in the side it comes with a giggle and you motion back at the visitor's center behind you. "Let's go see if anyone is in to chat with us about it."
Marcus snickers, wrapping his hand around your waist and tugging you closer while he snatches up the map with his free hand. "Let's go. Touring can wait."
Inside the Visitor's Center, the middle–aged woman sitting at the desk is pleasantly chatting with the last guests of a long line before turning her smile on you and Marcus. "Well hello there dears," she greets, just as pleasantly as a sunshiney summer day. "How can I help you?"
“My fiancée and I were hoping to talk to an events coordinator?” He glances back at you for confirmation at the title and when you nod, he turns and beams at her. “Is there one available, or do we need to make an appointment, Miss….” He glances at her name badge. “Amber?”
“Well certainly there is, but she is just finishing up a meeting at the moment.” Amber glances at her computer screen and back again without the smile ever leaving her face. “They should be done in just a few minutes if you’d like to wait and speak to her afterward?”
Marcus turns back to you, “do you want to wait, sweetheart?” He asks, rubbing your waist gently. Still proud as a peacock at being your fiancé.
“Why not?” There’s still a chance that there are no openings anytime soon, but waiting around for a few minutes to ask won’t hurt anything.
“Wonderful.” Amber picks up the telephone on her desk and pushes a few buttons with that everlasting smile on her face. “I’ll let her know she has someone waiting. May I have your name, sir?”
Marcus smiles as he gives your name and tries not to smirk when it’s obvious she recognizes the surname. “And Marcus Pike.”
“One moment, please.” The conversation that Amber heads into the receiver is hurried and she tries not to be terribly animated but you catch her glancing up at you once during the frazzled conversation and you smile kindly in response.
Marcus leans over and nuzzles your neck. “Hopefully she’s a political support of your mom and not firmly against her.” He teases quietly.
“Fingers crossed,” you laugh back quietly.
Marcus chuckles in your ear, holding you close as you both politely wait for the phone call to be finished.
When Amber sets down the receiver, she offers you and Marcus a warm smile and motions to a set of chairs to your side in the lobby of the Visitor's Center. "Melanie will be right with you. She will only be a few minutes more."
“Thank you.” Marcus thanks her sincerely and guides you to the chairs.
It's about ten minutes later than a tall, pretty blonde in a floral dress appears from around a corner, leading two people back toward the lobby of the building. If you hadn't watched them come into view you would have said it was too ridiculous. Too much of a coincidence. But there they are – Sam and Vanessa side–by–side with a notebook and pen in Vanessa's hands and Sam gesturing authoritatively all the way.
Marcus stiffens slightly, his hand squeezing yours gently and he wonders if he should stand and greet them or pretend that they aren’t known to you or him.
It only takes a split second, but the decision is taken from you almost instantly. Sam spots you from across the lobby and pauses only momentarily before aiming the group of them directly for you instead of toward the exit. “Looks like we’re doing this,” you murmur to Marcus, and stand with his hand still in yours as your exes approach.
“Congressman Chase, Vanessa.” Marcus greets both of them politely, if a little stiffly. Formal. Something that couldn’t be misinterpreted by anyone as rude. “What a surprise to see you both.”
“Well this is a surprise.” Sam doesn’t offer to shake Marcus Pike’s hand or yours, barely looking at you while the well–dresses blonde that had been walking with them senses the tension right away.
“Congressman. Miss D’Amario.” She looks nervous too, by association. Unlike Miss Amber at the desk, she knows exactly who is in front of her. “Let me just get you that last brochure, shall I?”
Marcus doesn’t say anything else, just rubbing the back of your hand gently and watching as the blonde guides them back towards the desk. “Well, I’m not sure why they are here.” He murmurs quietly.
“Who knows?” You huff quietly, holding onto him for stability. “Maybe the same reason we are.”
“No, no.” Sam’s voice is distinct in the echoing building. “We want to have the event at the house.” He is insisting loudly. “Not on an overlooking lawn.”
“I’m very sorry, sir, but as I explained to you, we have four locations across the grounds for private events.” With the patience of a saint, Melanie explains yet again. “Each location has multiple rooms available for hosting. However, the historical house is not one of them.”
“That’s is not good enough.” Sam tried charming her, but now it’s time to be serious. “Don’t you know what this is for?”
“Yes Congressman, you’ve been very clear about that.” Her painted on smile is placid and professional, even if her nerves are fraying slightly. “But with respect, even if the president wanted to have a campaign event here, the house would still not be an option.”
“There has to be a way to make this happen.” He glances over at you and Marcus, frowning slightly at why you are here. Another symbol of why he is having to fight so hard to make things happen. You’ve screwed him over.
“It is not an option we have available.” The woman’s eyes track his, glancing over at you in the lobby. She knows the ticking time bomb she has in her hands. She had been following the new first family in the news since the election. “And I assure you that our answer for anyone else will be the same.”
The shift of her eyes irritates him. Signifying that he’s not the most important person in the room. Clenching his jaw, he shakes his head. “I would hate for this to descend into a legal battle.” He speaks as if it’s not a threat but then he shifts topics. “What days are available?”
“If you are looking to hold an event next month, our lawn here is entirely booked aside from the night of Saturday the fourteenth. We had a cancellation that night. Otherwise we have smaller spaces available on several days but your maximum capacity for the event would be sixty people.”
"That will not be enough for our needs." Sam insists. "We would need the entire venue."
"We will be happy to accommodate the number of guests you quoted on the lawn on Saturday the fourteenth." The otherwise very pleasant looking blonde smothers a sigh of frustration and hands a brochure over to Vanessa, who accepts it with a snap of her hand and clips to the folder she is carrying. "Beyond that, our next available date to accommodate that many guests would be in January."
"Fine." He's not happy and he will be having a word with the proper people to get the answers he wants. "We will let you know, but pencil us in."
"The date will be held for twenty–four hours. At which time I will be happy to accept your deposit or establish an alternative plan with you for another space on the property, otherwise the availability will be released to other clients." When she smiles this time there is a measure of relief in it. "If there is anything else I can do for you, or anything other questions I can answer for you, please feel free to contact me. My office hours and direct line are listed on the card that I gave to your assistant."
Vanessa straightens slightly, tall and proud beside Sam. Her eyes flicker over to the pair of you to see if you are watching. Curious to know why you are here and desperate to not appear that way.
“Fine.” Sam bristles, disliking being told ‘no’ and placing the blame squarely on one single set of shoulders. No one had told him no while he was publicly dating the First Daughter. His effort to organize re–election events shouldn’t be nearly this hard, but here he is. Having to take meetings himself instead of making a simple phone call or just sending Vanessa on his behalf. But without knowing for certain why you and that FBI lackey of yours are here, he wants to see if he can at least eavesdrop on the beginning of your meeting before he leaves.
When Melanie shakes hands with Sam and Vanessa again, turning to walk towards you and Marcus, the two of you stand. “Thank you for taking the time to see us.” He starts, offering the slightly frazzled woman a sincere smile. “Hopefully our questions won’t be too arduous.”
“I’m sure they won’t be.” She wants to say that nothing would be as arduous as the meeting she just took, but that would be less than professional. She shakes your hand in turn and motions toward the direction she had come from with the congressman. “Why don’t we go to my office?”
Marcus does the polite thing and nods to Sam and Vanessa, a little surprised when the woman who had ended things with him amicably turns her head to snub him. He doesn’t say anything, just guides you to office, following behind Melanie at a few paces.
“Here we are.” Down a hall and up a few stairs, she stops and opens the door of an office to let you and Marcus inside. “My name is Melanie O’Neil and I’m the special event coordinator here at Monticello. I understand you’re interesting in planning an event with us?”
“Sweetheart?” Marcus looks towards you to take the lead, smiling softly.
"We were hoping you might have availability in the beginning of October, though I know that is short notice," you explain, but you did hear her rattle off some dates to Sam in the lobby. "We're interested in having our engagement party here."
“Engagement?” Her eyes widen happily as she takes in the sight of a happy couple in love. “Delightful.” She shuffles through the book and nods. “We have Saturday the fourteenth, I’m afraid that it is the only date available.” She tilts her head. “Someone else has expressed interest, but they have not paid to reserve it.” She would not feel bad about direct Sam Chase somewhere else.
"That would be fine with us, but I insist on waiting the appropriate twenty–four hours to give the other interested party their fair chance." You won't have Sam whining to some blogger about how you stole his venue space. That just won't fly. "Can you tell us a little about how you organize the space or if you have caterers on site?"
“It is the lawn area.” Motioning to the large detailed map of the event areas, she indicates a gorgeous area close to the water. “We can set up the space to accommodate practically any needs. A dance floor, a bar, string lighting.” She explains. “Tents are approved but they have to be provided by Monticello, to make sure that we don’t have someone coming in and destroying the grounds. Catering can be provided or you can invite someone in to cater for you.”
“That all sounds very reasonable.” The pricing is also reasonable for the location and what is being offered, and Melanie shows you and Marcus a brochure of price packages. “So we could select to have you provide the bar, tents, tables, chairs, lighting, and a dance floor…and we can bring in our own catering?”
“Absolutely.” She agrees with a nod and smile. “We pride ourselves on making sure that our clients have the best possible time.”
“And…” Glancing over at Marcus and then at the door where Agent Bailey is currently standing as nonchalantly as possible while keeping her eyes open. “You won’t have a problem with having the Secret Service on property?”
“Oh no.” If she’s shocked by the question, she doesn’t show it. “We will follow the lead of your security at all times. I do have to warn you that there are other events that day, but we keep the spaces separate.”
“That’s wonderful.” It’s hard to believe that anyone would have a problem doing business with this woman, but then…some people are quite picky. And you know Sam is one of them. “Honey, did you have any questions or ideas?” You ask, wanting to make sure Marcus is in on this planning.
Marcus considers the space and looks towards you. “Live band?” He asks. “Can there be speakers placed?”
“Certainly.” Melanie smiles at that and scribbles an additional note in the pad in front of her. “We have a bandstand ready to be put up when needed. As long as we’re not talking about a full scale orchestra, that can be accommodated.”
“No, nothing like that.” Marcus laughs. “I don’t think we would want to be that pretentious for an engagement party. We just want to have fun, right Birdie?”
“I don’t even want a big orchestra for the wedding, let alone the engagement party.” You agree, laughing a little at the very idea of it. It’s utterly ridiculous. You’re not orchestra people even if you do both like classical music sometimes. “No, I think we’re talking about something very reasonable. Nothing too big or too nit–picky.”
“I think that’s the best option, a live band and then we have a playlist for when they are taking breaks.” Marcus agrees looking towards Melanie. “Do you have a lot of bands that you work with? I’m not too familiar with the scene here.”
“We have a few.” She nods, turning to her computer, presumably to print out a list. “Mostly the kind you would hire for a wedding. Cover bands like that get a lot of work out here.”
“I would imagine they would.” Marcus agrees, looking towards you. “What do you think, sweetheart? Unless you have someone specific?”
“No, I think that sounds perfect.” Live music is definitely something you both feel strongly about, and it continues to incorporate local artists into the fold of every one of your events. It’s an excellent plan. “Can I leave you my number, and ask you to give me a call tomorrow to tell me whether or not Congressman Chase decides to take the date?” You ask Melanie as politely as possible. “If he doesn’t, I think we’ll be very glad to have it.”
“I will most assuredly call you.” She promises with a smile, hoping that she deals with you instead of the congressman.
“Then how about a tour?” You suggest, offering the woman a smile.
“That would be wonderful.” Marcus agrees. “If you have time, of course.”
“Of course.” Melanie stands from her desk again. “Come along with me.”
******
“What if we just stayed here?” You groan for the second time this morning, burrowing deeper into Marcus’s side in bed as the sun rises higher in the morning sky. It’s early but you have a lot to do. His parents and a few other friends and family are arriving this morning for the engagement party tonight. The planning had gone well for being such short notice, but that still doesn’t mean you want to leave the warmth of your fiancé’s side just yet. There are a thousand things to do today before the party tonight, but you’ll manage. You just want a few more minutes of quiet with Marcus before facing it all.
“Then we will have a party that will be will be talked about for ages.” Marcus hums in amusement. “An engagement party where the couple doesn’t arrive.” He rubs your back gently. “We could start a new fad.”
“It would be very mysterious of us,” you snicker, knowing you and Marcus are some of the least mysterious people on the planet.
“Yes it would. I think everyone would start a manhunt for us.” He laughs.
“Probably not the best idea,” you admit, even if it makes you laugh. “Since the Secret Service would be involved in the manhunt.”
“Millions of taxpayer dollars, wasted.” He snorts, smirking at you slightly. “All the helicopters they would bring out.”
You snort, looking up at him in the morning light and sigh dramatically to get one more laugh from him. "I guess we should get up then, huh?"
“If we have to.” This time, he’s the one pouting. “Our honeymoon needs to be someplace quiet. A cabin in the mountains. Where we just stay in bed all day.”
"You know you can go stay at the hotel where they filmed Dirty Dancing, right?" As you drag yourself out of bed on the morning of your engagement party, talking about your honeymoon sounds like the perfect conversation.
“Really?” Marcus hums, intrigued by the idea. “It’s really up in the Catskills, isn’t it?”
"It is." Unconcerned with wearing anything night for the first part of the day, you go straight to your closet for jeans and a t–shirt. You'll change into the silver cocktail dress you have picked out later tonight. "And they supposedly really lean into the Dirty Dancing thing, which is fun."
“I’m sure Agent Bailey would love an isolated cabin to have us locked away.” He teases. “If you want to look into that, I’m completely game.”
“It’s a far cry from our original idea.” Which is neither good nor bad, just worth pointing out. “Paris is very different from a cabin in the Catskills.”
“That’s true.” Marcus stops and turns to you. “I love the idea of both, each for very different reasons.” He admits with a grin. “Whatever you want, as long as I’m with you, I’ll be happy.”
“We could always make up a little list?” You offer, ultimately pulling an old college t–shirt out of your closet with a clean bra. “And then narrow it down after we settle on a wedding date?”
“That works for me.” Marcus agrees, watching you as you start to get dressed. It’s probably his favorite part of the day, unless you count undressing.
"Where else might you want to go?" He's watching carefully and you wiggle your hips a little in his direction.
Marcus grunts, feeling his body respond to the little tease and he’s honestly wondering if he can take you back to bed for another hour. “Um…you pick.” He tells you. “A beach?”
"The beach is good." If you reach for a pair of nearly non–existent panties just to keep teasing him? Well, who can blame you for that? "Sand and swimming and sunny skies. Are you thinking Mexico or Mediterranean?"
Marcus blows out a breath when you pull out the see through lace that is literally just scraps of cloth posing as panties. “Mexico would be nice. Somewhere off the beaten path?”
"Someplace with a little bungalow and a private beach?" Since Marcus likes to tease you just as much as you like to tease him, you don't feel bad for even a second about bending over dramatically in front of him so he can have the best view of your ass when you put your panties on. "Hawaii could be fun, too."
“Too many people.” He immediately grunts. “Too many cameras.”
That makes you smirk, and you throw it over your shoulder at him. “So you’re looking to have me all to yourself?”
“Absolutely.” He nods immediately, finding your eyes for a moment before he goes back to ogling you. “All mine.”
“Well that’s true even if we go someplace not isolated.” Deciding to continue messing with him just a tiny bit, you grab your tightest jeans to slip into while you’re still talking. “I’ve been yours since the day we met.”
“But I’m thinking more of being able to strip you down whenever I want.” He admits with a grin. Completely unrepentant at the idea. “Maybe not even pack clothes.”
“If that’s what we’re going to do, we can lock ourselves in the house and Door Dash every meal.” You remind him, finally going to put on your bra and shirt. “Our honeymoon is a chance to have an adventure together. A sexy adventure, but still an adventure.”
“Get your head out of the gutter, got it.” He winks and shoots finger guns at you playfully. “Like it said, just ideas.”
“Listen,” you grin in response to his silliness. “If we decide on a winter wedding, we’re absolutely going someplace tropical to get away. I’m not looking to put snowshoeing on our itinerary.”
“So an Alaskan dog sledding race is off the table?” He jokes, snickering to himself.
“You don’t like snow either, Texas.” But both of you laugh, and as you shimmy into your t–shirt you’re already feeling better about the day. “Also…I don’t think a winter wedding sounds ideal. Even DC gets snow, and we lose any chance of having part of the night outside.”
“Yeah, I’ve never understood the ‘Winter Wonderland’ theme some people go for.” He admits with a huff. “Freezing my nut— uh, toes off doesn’t sound fun.”
“No,” you snort and tug him up out of bed to get dressed with you. “Freezing your nuts off does not sound fun.”
“Caught that, huh?” He huffs, even if he’s well aware that you don’t mind that kind of humor. “I don’t think you would like it either. You seem to like that part of my body.”
“I like that part of your body very much.” Your smirk is puckish. “Just as much as you like my tits.”
“Don’t forget your ass.” He reminds you, smirking as he pulls off his sleep shirt to get dressed. “I like that too. Oh and your thighs.”
“I like all parts of you and you like all parts of me.” You bite your lip unconsciously when he starts to change, always admiring of your fiancé in as many ways as he’ll let you at any given time. Marcus isn’t vain. He doesn’t dedicate himself to cut abs and weight lifting. But he does go to the gym to be in shape for his job and that combined with his love of food has made him broad and strong with a layer of cushioning softness that you adore.
“Then it sounds like we are a perfect match.” He winks at you as you eye him. Turning around and wiggling his own hips playfully, even though he has a flat ass.
It gets a snort and a giggle from you, and you swat at him playfully. “Do you want to go downstairs for breakfast or have something up here?”
“Completely up to you, love.” He promises. “I’ve heard rumors that Syd has been haunting the kitchens with a snuggly little Constance strapped to her chest.
“I keep telling her that maternity leave exists for a reason, but she can’t stay away.” Not that you blame her. You know for damn certain that you won’t be able to stay away from the inn after you’ve had your kids, either. “Let’s go down and say hello.”
He snorts to himself, well aware that he will be fighting the same battle Juan is when you are recovering from giving birth. “I think we need to just build her a house on the property too.” He tells you. “Make sure she’s close enough to rest.”
“The house is almost done.” Just one more month, according to the contractors. “Maybe we should keep the apartment up here as a resting space for the staff for a while? Before we turn it into a guest suite.”
“Orrrrrr…” Marcus tilts his head as he looks around the apartment. It’s not large, but it’s large enough. “What if we turned it into a small area for a nanny?” He asks. “Someone to come and watch Constance and the future Pike brood for us?” He had been thinking about it and it seemed like a good idea and it would allow everyone peace of mind in knowing the kids are close.
“That…” Your eyes flick up to his, wistful smile tugging at your lips and warmth blooming in your heart. “Sounds like a wonderful idea.” Marcus has an uncanny ability to see the future so clearly that it might make you envious if you weren’t so grateful to have him as your partner. “I genuinely love that, baby.”
“You do?” He asks, wondering if you are just agreeing to it because you are so in love with him right now. “I figured it would be a good way for you to see the babies, ours and Syd’s, anytime you get a chance.”
“It’s a lot more practical than driving them to daycare in town only to come back here for work.” Instinct and affection make you want to snuggle into his side again, but you know you have things to do around the possibility that your baby goddaughter is downstairs make you reach for a cardigan instead of your fiancé. “I think it’s smart. And will probably save us some anxiety in the long run.”
“I think so.” Marcus agrees quickly. “There’s someone dedicated to watching them, so work can be uninterrupted, but you can see and snuggle them when needed.”
“Don’t pretend you won’t be working through your lunches sometimes just to get home to them sooner.” It’s an image you can see so vividly that it almost makes you glow, knowing how much Marcus is looking forward to being a father to as many kids as you can manage together.
“Have to make it home before the sun goes down.” He scoffs. “How else will we play ball? It can’t be in the house.”
“The only balls anybody’s playing with in the house are yours when I give you head,” you tell him unequivocally, nudging him toward the bedroom door once you’re both dressed to go brush your teeth together so you can go downstairs and eat.
He snorts in amusement, although he can’t deny that you do play with his balls while you are blowing him. Smacking his lips to your cheek before he loads up your toothbrush and then his, he winks in the mirror – thoroughly enjoying the everyday chores with you.
You’re on your way downstairs within about fifteen minutes. Agent Bailey is downstairs by your office when the elevator opens, having opened up to giving you more space now that you have an armed federal officer in the apartment with you every night. Around the corner and into the kitchen, you have to smother a squeal of delight when you see Syd hovering by the line with little Constance in her baby carrier strapped safely to mama’s chest.
“Told you.” Marcus bumps your arms and immediately grins when he sees the little girl. Shes not too old to stay awake for long and she’s snoozing peacefully while the chaos of the kitchen goes on around her. “This has to be her lullaby.” He jokes. “She grew in the womb to it.”
“Oh my goodness, oh my goodness, oh my goodness.” You scurry to Sydney’s side without hesitation to hug her gently and peer into little Constance’s face. “Hello angel! Oh my goodness she’s so sweet when she sleeps!”
“She’s actually one of those babies that sleeps better amidst the noise!” Sydney laughs and rubs her daughter’s back through the sling, leaning against you instantly. “You caught me, huh?”
“I’m not even cross that you’re poking around work while you’re supposed to be resting because you brought the baby,” you admit, although you restrain yourself from doing anything besides admiring Constance. Waking her up by accident would be awful. “Are you guys feeling okay about coming out tonight?” Juan’s mother had assured her son and daughter–in–law that the baby would be in expert hands if they wanted to make the engagement party their first outing since her birth. And you had also assured them that you wouldn’t be offended if they only came to the party for dinner and headed home before the dancing to be with their little girl.
“I’m looking forward to it.” She admits with a lopsided smile. “Just forgive me if I text my mother–in–law six hundred times to check on her?” She asks, knowing you would never be upset about that. “I don’t know how we are ever going to drop her into a daycare. That’s if we find one that will open up in the next six months.” They have been on a wait list for the daycare of their choice since she found out she was pregnant. There are still twelve other couples on the wait list ahead of them.
“Marcus actually had an idea about that.” A proud grin to your fiancé on the other side of the kitchen where he is getting your breakfast from Syd’s sous chef lights up your whole face. “Why don’t we bring dinner over to your place after the weekend is over and the chaos subsides, and we’ll tell you about it?”
“Of course.” She grins at the way the two of you had made deep and lasting plans. Knowing you deserve all that and so much more. “Indian?” She suggests. “I’m craving curry.”
“We’ll get take out from Rasika. Whatever you want.” While it might be one of your and Marcus’s favourite take out spots, it’s also a favorite of your friend group so that is an easy answer. “And you text home as much as you need to tonight, love.” Casting your eye from mother to daughter, your smile softens and your heart aches from wanting one of your own. “This little angel is worth it.”
“Isn’t she?” Like any new mother, her daughter is the most perfect thing to ever exist. “She’s feeding for longer. She ate four whole ounces yesterday when Juan fed her a bottle.” She’s pumping and they are bottle feeding to make sure Juan gets his own bonding time with Constance when Sydney isn’t breastfeeding. Plus there are times the still recovering mother is too tired to do it. So it helps them tag team their newborn.
You and Syd can and have cooed together over her growing girl for hours at a time, so you don’t even realize you’ve been standing there for ten solid minutes being an absolutely doting pair of sentimental idiots until Marcus comes up behind you and gently slides one hand around your waist.
“You need to eat, sweetheart.” He reminds you, whispering in your ear as he watches the baby sleep against her mother’s chest. He’s gotten to hold her for a bit, but he lets you hold her more when the opportunity presents itself. “We have a lot to do before the party.”
There are two plates with pesto–prosciutto breakfast panini on them sitting on the counter nearby along with two oversized ice coffees and you relent, leaning back against Marcus after giving Syd one more gentle squeeze. “You’re right,” you sigh. “I just want to stare at this little nugget of a baby forever.”
“I know.” Marcus chuckles. “How many times have you thought about having our first since she’s been born?” He teases, knowing he’s also been hit by baby fever as well.
“Like fifteen times a day every single day.” You can’t help but laugh, knowing he feels the same, and you let him peel you away from the baby reluctantly when Syd’s sous chef has a question for her. “Fifteen is a minimum estimate, by the way.”
“I was honestly thinking it was more like thirty.” He laughs. “I’m about that too.”
“Maybe we shouldn’t wait a whole year to get married?” The idea hums through you with excitement. Being able to have a wedding date by tonight would be a fun little plus.
“When’s the last time the roses bloom in the Rose Garden?” Marcus asks, knowing you want to have your wedding there.
“September, really.” The first week of September would be a full year from when Marcus proposed, which seems tidy to you in a way you weren’t expecting but makes you smile. “What if we did early September? Would that step on Constance’s first birthday?”
“I think we should talk about it with the parents, but I don’t see that being a problem honestly.” Marcus hums happily.
"I heard parents!" Syd calls across the kitchen, fearless in the face of a miracle baby who truly can sleep through the chaos of a kitchen. She bounces subtly as she walks across the room, making sure her daughter is comfortable against her chest, and leans against the counter where you and Marcus are having your breakfast. "What's up?"
“We were talking about wedding dates.” Marcus admits, glancing at you with a small smirk. “We don’t want to schedule something to step on the birthday girl’s toes.” He reaches out and caresses the sleeping baby with the back of index finger.
"Were you guys thinking of doing it in September?" She asks, eyes sliding over to you and when you nod through a bite of food she smiles. "What if we pick a different weekend?" Sydney suggests. "I don't want to suggest doing the baby's birthday in place of a day–after brunch or anything. So we can just do two weekends in a row?"
“Or we could.” Marcus offers with a grin. “I know my family is up for celebrating a baby’s first birthday. Especially since they are going to fall in love with her tonight.” He warns. “Constance will be gaining a lot of aunts and uncles.”
"We weren't really planning on having a day–after event anyway," you assure her. There are already so many wedding events on your plate that adding one more sounds overwhelming to you. "What if we added more of Juan's family to the wedding guest list so they'll already be in town, and the next day we can all relax with something much more casual? It sounds...kind of perfect, actually."
“I think that Juan would like that. I thinks it’s perfect.” Their friendship had grown even closer and Juan had confided he wanted more time with his family. It’s the perfect opportunity. “We can book out the inn, right?” He asks you. “And get more hotel rooms, of course.” He chuckles. “My mom has already said she wants to stay here but the Watergate Hotel is calling her name.”
"We could have Connie's birthday here?" You raise an eyebrow to Syd in question. "We'll be surrounded by family and friends and you'll barely have to roll out of bed to get here." The Badillo house is close by and you and Marcus will be more or less in the inn's backyard.
"Comfort food, family event, and very casual." Sydney laughs, but she is nodding her head. "Sean has been a great sous chef. I know he can handle that even with my nitpicky ass hovering over everything."
“It sounds like we have a plan.” Marcus agrees. “So I think our wedding day needs to be the day before little Connie’s birthday.”
"September ninth." Of course you and Sydney say it at the same time, grinning at each other. Constance was born in the wee hours of the tenth.
"That means it will be a long weekend for people. It will be good to give them the date well in advance." It will be beautiful, is what it will be. Beautiful, and fun, and an occasion well worth celebrating.
**
His suit and your dress in the trunk of the car, Marcus steers towards the venue happily. “So we start getting set up, the band should be there first, right?” He asks. “Get the sound check done before the other vendors?”
"Yeah, that's what we planned on." A White House photographer will also be on hand, documenting the event for any press that Annette deems appropriate. You've left it entirely to her. "Melanie will be there to direct traffic, and she has a room for us to change and keep personal affects in."
“My parents are landing in about an hour.” He reminds you. “They will be out here to help and generally support us as soon as they drop bags in the hotel.”
"Selena, Leo, and Clark are all meeting us out here around the same time. They're riding together." The contingent from Dallas that has moved to DC in the last few months have banded together well and are all excited to join the next board game night. Bringing your friends and his together has been exceptionally easy.
“Perfect.” Marcus chuckles. “It’s a good thing the bartender will be showing up next.” He jokes. “Seriously, if we need to get any last minute items, mom said she’ll send dad.”
"I'm just glad we decided not to do flowers." It had been Junie's idea. During the Friday night dinner after you had booked Monticello, the discussion at the table had turned to decor and when your mother's ideas for florals got overcomplicated it had been your sister who suggested having a few large, live plants amongst the tents and lights and candles on the tables instead. "Melanie pulled those potted plants and light plans out of nowhere and I love her for it."
“I think it will make the wedding even more special.” Marcus admits. “Flowers don’t need to be at every event.”
"The rose garden is going to be spectacular." Your genuine excitement for that is infectious enough that it makes Marcus beam brightly at you as he pulls his car into the large lot around the Monticello visitor center.
“Wow.” Marcus frowns slightly as he sees all the vendor vans. “Are they early?”
"They must be." You check the time on your phone and frown to see that it is a full forty–five minutes before the caterer is set to arrive, and two of the vans nearby are marked with a florist's logo. "Maybe it's for one of the other locations on the property? Melanie did say they had multiple events tonight."
“That has to be it.” He agrees, although he knows the other venues have their own designated parking on the other side. He sends you a smile as he parks. “Let’s go get started.”
Melanie is waiting for you inside, smiling and ready in the lobby. “It’s so good to see you!” The nice thing about her is that she seems to actually mean it. “Your caterers just got here, and the florists are starting to unload. We’re doing great for time.”
“Uh...” Marcus shakes his head and looks towards you. “We don’t have a florist.” He reminds her. “The potted plants were what we decide, right?” He asks, wanting to make sure that the plan hadn’t changed.
"And I confirmed the arrival time with the caterers this morning. They aren't supposed to be here for another hour." Your worried eyes meet Marcus's and then Melanie's. "I think there has been some kind of mix–up."
Her brow furrows for a moment and she nods. “I will go make sure they aren’t supposed to be on the other side of the mansion.” She decides, sure that it’s a simple mistake.
"I'm sure it's nothing." The words come out of your mouth but you aren't convinced. Instead, you squeeze Marcus's hand in yours and head to the small room beside Melanie's office to store your party clothes and purse until you're ready to change.
“I’m sure it will all be worked out.” Marcus promises, reassuring you even if he has his own worry. “Come on, let’s go see the space.”
Once your things are stowed away, the pair of you step outside to the lawn to check out the tents, lights, and plants as they should be finished being put up. But instead of seeing potted plants and fairy lights there are sunflower arrangements and autumn harvest centerpieces stacked out on the banquet tables. Even the tables have the wrong color tablecloths – deep navy instead of the seasonal shade of red that you had picked out.
“Well, shit.” Marcus huffs, clearly seeing the problem and he quickly steps over to the young lady that is directing the flowers. “Excuse me.” He interrupts politely. “I’m afraid there is a problem.”
"There is?" She looks spooked, almost like a deer in the headlights with the large arrangement of flowers in her hands. "I'm sorry, I'm not sure–who are you, exactly?"
“Sorry.” He’s always going to fall back to manners, so he offers her an apologetic smile. “I’m Marcus Pike and this is my fiancée.” He introduces you. “We are setting up for our engagement party tonight and we don’t have floral arrangements.” He explains kindly. “Are you sure you have the right spot here? I know there’s several events happening tonight.”
“Oh!” She laughs in obvious relief and digs in her pocket to pull out some folded paperwork to show you both. “I think you’re in the wrong place, Mr. Pike. We’re setting up for Mr. Chase.”
Fuck. Marcus feels you tense beside him, but he shakes his head. “No, I’m sorry, but I’m not in the wrong place.” He tells her kindly aware that she is a vendor caught in the middle of something. It’s not her fault. “My fiancée and I rented out this space for tonight. Mr. Chase must have gotten his dates mixed up.” Marcus is well aware that isn’t the case, but he won’t air dirty laundry in front of her. “Here.” He pulls out his own contract for the venue that he had slipped into his pocket, always one to cover his bases and he’s glad that paid off.
“That’s weird…” Looking at both contracts, the florist frowns heavily and offers you both an apologetic expression. “Let me get my boss. Hang on one second,” she says before scurrying away.
“Shit.” Marcus hisses, turning towards you. “What are the odds it’s a mix up on Melanie’s part?” He knows the answer, and so do you.
“Zero. That woman is so meticulous it makes Juan look scatterbrained.” Closing your eyes against the frustrated outburst that is pushing on your chest right now, you lean into Marcus and exhale slowly. “I honestly can’t believe he’d go this far.”
“Just plaster on that amazing customer service charm and I will dazzle them with kindness.” He murmurs, leaning in and kissing your temple. “We have the contract for the venue.”
“I love you.” Murmured words aren’t enough to keep your heart from pounding with anxiety, but his arms around you are. Marcus hugs you tight and you just find yourself wondering what the hell happened to turn Sam into this vindictive monster…or if he was always this way and you never knew him at all.
“I love you too, sweetheart.” He promises. “It’s just a small bump in the road.”
“I hope you’re right.” It’s terrifying to think that things might go so entirely wrong so early. It isn’t something that sits well with you, especially not when you have almost a hundred people coming tonight.
“It will.” He promises again, kissing your forehead again. “We have a legal contract.”
A serious looking woman with short gray hair and a clipboard comes back with the girl who had scurried away, and she introduces herself only to Marcus with forceful authority. "I understand we have some confusion on our hands?"
“Yes madam.” Marcus shows her the contract that Melanie had given him, clearly stating the space and date were his and gives her an apologetic smile. “I’m afraid your client is mistaken.”
"I'm sure that's not right." The prim woman doesn't even look at the paperwork that is being presented to her. "The Congressman was very specific in his planning and we are right on time in setting up for tonight."
“The Congressman was mistaken.” Marcus insists, a little more firmly. “The First Daughter signed this contract to rent this space tonight for her engagement party. Which the President will be in attendance for.” Titles seem to impress this woman, so he throws out a few that are sure to get her attention.
"Let's see if we can't get all of this sorted out." Melanie has appeared, looking frazzled but quickly recomposing herself with a young man in tow behind her. "It seems that our event staff did not verify paperwork for the caterer or florist when you arrived." She offers the gray–haired woman a professional smile, but you get the impression that the kid behind her with his tail tucked between his legs is going to get his ass kicked for this mistake. "May I see both sets of reservations, please? I'm sure we can get this cleared up quickly."
Marcus steps back and lets Melanie take over, sure that she will be able to clear things up quickly. He turns to you and gives you a reassuring smile.
"Well, I'm not sure what went wrong." After looking over both contracts, Melanie holds tight to both and looks between her actual clients and the florist who apparently should not be here. "But unfortunately, Congressman Chase never reserved this date or location with my office, did not make any payment on the space, and certainly is not hosting an event here tonight. So I'm going to have to ask you to leave, I'm afraid. We do have a contracted event here tonight and our security will be very tight."
“I’m sorry?” Blinking owlishly, the prim woman shakes her head, obviously not used to being told no. “Congressman Chase has a campaign event here tonight. Many important people will be here.”
"More important than the President of the United States?" Melanie challenges, not backing down. What she does, though, is turn to you and Marcus and apologize. "I will take care of this. If you would like to have a seat inside, I will absolutely come and let you know when everything is resolved."
“Thank you.” Marcus takes your arm and leads you towards the building so Melanie can deal with things. “You might want to call that White House press person.” He murmurs quietly. “I have a feeling Chase did this on purpose.”
"I don't know what the hell we did to deserve this," you huff, pulling out your phone to call Annette. She's probably on her way to the venue already but you know she was coming with her husband so hopefully he's driving and she can talk.
“I think he’s got a fucking screw loose.” Marcus mutters, shaking his head at the increasing antics the congressman is pulling.
When the call connects you have to swallow a sound of relief mixed with frustration. Getting to talk to Annette is a relief but you're so frustrated you could scream. "Annette? It's Birdie. We, uh...we have a situation. It appears that Sam Chase has attempted to double book the same venue as us for tonight."
“Oh dear.” The soft sigh is one of practiced patience, having put out many a fire in her day. “It’s not a mistake on the venue?” She clarifies.
"No." You shake your head as though she can see you, but it's just an emotional reaction. "Miss O'Neil is certain there was no mix up in the booking, but there are vendors here to set up for a campaign event that is definitely not supposed to be happening." Glancing up at Marcus beside you, you sigh softly. "Marcus and I suspect that Sam is trying some kind of indecipherable stunt. To make us look heartless or something equally outlandish. Like we stole his venue, I guess."
“Gotcha.” Her voice is slightly terse but it’s not towards you. “I will start making calls to his office right now. You just hang tight and I’ll be there in a few minutes. Don’t worry.”
"Thank you, Annette." Your eyes close against the sinking feeling in your stomach that the night is starting to unravel at an alarming rate. "We'll see you soon."
You end the call and Marcus reaches for you, pulling you into his arms. “It’s okay, sweetheart.” He soothes you, quietly.
“She’s almost here.” The urge to cry out of sheer frustration is strong, and you bury yourself in Marcus’s chest for strength. “What in the hell did we do to deserve this?”
“I don’t know.” He answers honestly, unable to fathom the malice behind the way Sam Chase is operating. “But we will show him that we are not to be messed with.”
“How?” The question is incredulous, but it’s honestly because you’re feeling so at sea with confusion in this whole situation. “By running to my mommy about it? The President can’t kick a Congressman out of power for being a dick to her daughter.”
“By showing him that he holds no power over us.” It’s a bit unsatisfying, being the bigger person and not using his own status to make like difficult for Congressman Chase, but he wants to be above reproach when shit hits the fan. And he has no doubt it will.
“Ugh, that’s so unsatisfying,” you groan, unknowingly echoing his thought exactly. It’s a small mercy to have the same thought, though, and you both laugh. “I want to nail him to the wall but there’s no crime against being an asshole.”
“I know, but he wants to get under your skin.” He reminds you softly. “That’s the entire point of this, I think.”
“Well he’s succeeded.” As much as you hate to admit it, he really has. He’s made you feel guilty and selfish for wanting to celebrate your love with your soulmate, which isn’t fair in the least.
“I know.” Marcus kisses your forehead again. “I’ve never wanted to hit someone more in my entire life.” He huffs. “Not even Patrick Jane when he convinced Teresa to choose him.”
"And that guy was an asshole," you huff, having heard the entire story from Marcus early on in your relationship.
“Yeah…he really is.” He chuckles and pulls away slightly to look into your eyes. “He did me a favor.”
"I don't know what I did to deserve you." His kindness and his support mean the world to you, and the ugly realization that if Marcus had not appeared in your life like a whirlwind that you might still be with Sam? It stings your heart in a way that isn't quite aching or envy but that smacks of bitter regret.
“Just being the most wonderful woman in the world.” He teases, nudging his nose against yours.
"Hardly." Or, at least, it doesn't feel like it right now. But you sigh, letting yourself settle against him and accepting the kiss he offers you before you stand straight again. "We should change a little early," you decide after a moment. "Present a united front of joy instead of looking like we're not quite prepared."
“Whatever you want to do, sweetheart.” He will follow your lead of course, wanting you to feel in charge. Especially with the turn of events.
"I think it might be better." Or, at least, it well help you feel less at sea. Because right now you just feel like you're floundering in uncertainty. "Especially if we have to deal with Sam directly."
“Do you think that he will actually show up?” His brows lift and he doesn’t like that prospect at all. Sam has been exhibiting dangerous behavior, even if he can’t prove it has been him behind the vicious rumors.
"At this point I'm not really sure what to expect at all." But confidence comes from all places, and if right now it comes from putting on the beautiful dress that Alex and David helped you pick out and going out there holding Marcus's hand? Then so be in. Sam does not get to ruin to night, and he does not get to ruin your joy. "But I guess I would rather be mentally prepared for the worst."
“Whatever happens…” Marcus smiles at you proudly. “I’m going to be right there beside you.”
**
It takes nearly a half an hour to calm down, change clothes, and do your make up, but once you’re ready you head back outside with Marcus to find Agent Bailey waiting for you in the lobby and a commotion outside. “What’s going on?” You ask, though you’re afraid for the answer and not even sure if she will know.
“Miss D’Amario is trying to get the Congressman on the phone,” Agent Bailey explains. “Your vendors are starting to arrive and Melanie had them prepping so they can set up the second the others are cleared away.”
“Vanessa is here?” Marcus looks around warily and spots her standing off to the side looking slightly frazzled as she furiously types on her phone.
“Awesome.” The obvious sarcasm in your voice comes out in a huff. Your exes always being together is more like a Nightmare Team than a Dream Team.
“I’m going to talk to her.” Marcus decides, done with them upsetting you.
“I’m going to stay nearby so that I can intercept anyone who arrives,” you decide. Going up on your toes to give him a kiss, you brush the sharp lapel off his blue suit and offer him your most encouraging smile. “Go get ‘em, Slugger.”
Marcus smiles at your reassurance, but it drops into a frown when he turns and walks towards Vanessa. He’s tired of the games and now, he’s going to face the problem head on. “What is going on, Vanessa?” He demands when he reaches her side. “This is getting ridiculous.”
“What’s going on is crossed wires.” She doesn’t look up from her phone. She doesn’t need to. She still knows Marcus Pike’s voice. “I don’t know how this woman could possibly have booked us both tonight and now she’s playing dumb and getting defensive about it.”
“She’s not playing dumb, but I’m disappointed you are.” Marcus states flatly, sighing softly. “This little game you and Chase are playing needs to stop.”
“I’m not playing dumb.” Vanessa defends, brow furrowed in frustration as she looks up at Marcus after hitting the send button on her text. “The Congressman booked the location himself. All the other vendors were booked by me personally. We’re supposed to be here.”
“Did he forward you the contract and emails?” Her reaction is more honest than he expected and the fact that Sam booked the venue makes him wonder if she was kept in the dark. He pulls out the contract he had tried to show the vendor earlier. “Where is this if Chase actually was double booked?”
“He has the contract. I’m trying to get ahold of him to get a copy right now.” She huffs, frustration and uncertainty lining the worries creases in her brow. “Why couldn’t you two have just had your little party at her hotel anyway? Isn’t that what the place is for? You don’t need the clout of a place like Monticello.”
“Why should she always have parties where she’s doing most of the work? This is our engagement party.” Marcus fires back, unable to believe the condescension in her tone. “What do you have against her, Vanessa? You ended things with me not the other way around. And I thought we ended on good terms.”
“She’s a snob. And dishonest, too boot.” Vanessa doesn’t hold back, obviously pushed to the edge of whatever manners she usually has by the situation at hand. “Almost an entire year in the campaign trail as her mother’s Golden Child preaching freedom of affection and holding Sam up to be the next Jack Kennedy and then she flips her entire platform on a dime when she claims to find her soulmate. It’s pandering, Marcus. And I honestly thought you were better than that.”
“I am her soulmate, Vanessa.” He murmurs quietly. “We didn’t know when we met. I figured it out, that night you broke up with me. Hell, she knew before I did and didn’t say anything because she was with Chase.” He sighs. “So freedom of affection means you can’t choose your soulmate?” He asks. “What about you? You chose your soulmate when you broke up with me. Should I have been spiteful?”
“I always wanted my soulmate.” Vanessa defends, standing up a little straighter and squaring her shoulders. As it that stance somehow gives her a moral high ground. “I support him, and take care of him, and do whatever he needs. That is what love is.”
It clicks, like a bolt of lightning. “It’s Sam, isn’t it?” He asks. “Your soulmate is Sam Chase. That’s why you are doing this.”
The frown on her face flattens into a thin line, unwilling to say a single thing against the man she’s been loyal to for years now. “If I can’t give him the position he wants, I can at least help him make up for what he’s lost,” she reasons, not thinking for a moment that Marcus would understand. He isn’t ambitious the way Sam is. He doesn’t want to lead. To mold an entire nation. Dating the First Daughter was supposed to get him there in leaps and bounds.
He shakes his head sadly, hating to see that Vanessa is blind to what is happening. Willingly looking the other way. “Are you happy?” He asks. “Not being enough?” He folds the contract up and puts it back in his pocket. “If losing access to the White House on a personal level is a detriment, then he’s not a very good politician.” Marcus turns around and starts to walk back towards you.
“No one gets into the White House without knowing someone.” She tells his back, tone laced with bitterness because, No of course she isn’t happy, but why does her ex boyfriend have to be the one to point that out to her? “Just like you don’t get to Hollywood or a record deal or a place in an Ivy League without it.”
He doesn’t answer her, knowing that nothing he says will get through to her. She’s blinded by her loyalty to Sam and her utter devotion to the idea that she should support her soulmate no matter what. It’s a twisted logic and he feels bad for her. When they were together, she was a sweet and earnest woman, looking forward to having a family and building a life with her soulmate.
When Marcus comes back to your side he looks sad rather than angry, and you frown all the more deeply for it. “What’s going on?” You ask gently, letting him lean into your side for comfort. “What did she say?”
“Well….I figured out why Vanessa is so blindly helping Chase with his revenge.” He sighs and glances back at the other woman. “She’s his soulmate.”
“Ah shit.” It was somehow in the back of your mind the whole time, you realize, and now that he’s said it there are puzzle pieces that click into place all too easily. “So this…all of this really is just about the fact that I dumped him?” It makes your skin crawl to think about, a grotesque and unsettling feeling that you know is going to haunt you far longer than you want to admit.
“He wants the White House one day.” He reminds you. “I’m almost positive that he either made promises to people because of having access to the President, or was using that relationship to bolster his career.”
“Well that doesn’t make me feel used and disgusting at all.” You cringe, eyes set down on the sturdy flooring beneath your feet. It’s worse than disgusting, actually. It’s downright humiliating. You’d fallen in love with his act. Bought it hook, line, and sinker. Meeting Marcus may have snapped you out of it, but you had still be entirely fooled for a year.
“Hey.” Marcus reaches for you, rubbing your arms and pulling you closer. “Don’t blame yourself, sweetheart.” He hums. “Chase is a man who put on an act to get what he wants. He has fooled plenty of people.”
“Please know that none of this is because I missed him or still had feelings for him.” Careful not to get makeup on his shirt, you tuck into Marcus’s embrace and breathe in the strength of him. “I’m embarrassed at being taken in so completely. And love you impossibly more for being such a good, honest man.”
“I don’t think you feel anything but heartbroken that he could feign affection for his own personal career gain.” He promises. He would have thought it was because of his feelings for you that he was reacting so badly to this, except for what Vanessa had told him. “Even if you still had feelings for him, I would never expect you to turn off a year of emotions like a switch.” He’s secure enough in your love that there is not any reason to doubt you or be jealous.
“Whatever I felt for him started dimming the second I met you,” you assure him. Even though you and Marcus are strong in the love you have for each other, a bit of reassurance never goes amiss. “More than anything I’m upset with myself for being so blind to his true intentions.”
“Honey, you can’t always see the darkness in someone’s heart.” He reminds you, not wanting you to feel guilty. You have nothing to be upset about. Your intentions have always been good.
“So what do we do now?” He seems to have the answers tonight and there is comfort in that — on top of which, he is the one who talked to Vanessa. “Is she backing down? I don’t want to have to have an altercation.”
“I don’t think she knows what is going on, to be honest.” He admits, looking back at the very flustered woman. “I told her that if it was a venue mix up, the congressman would have a contract.”
“Vanessa does all his bookings.” You look up at him in confusion. “Shouldn’t she have the contract?”
“She said he booked the venue and she booked everything else.” He explains, shaking his head. “It’s pure fucking malice.”
“He never booked it.” The realization kicks you in the gut with the force of a wild stallion. “He’s going to go to the press with a story about us stealing his event venue to make us look bad.”
“What better way to do that, with all the press already here for his ‘event’?” His smile is brittle and humorless.
“I heard the press.” Annette comes swinging around the corner and into view like she’s late for a cue on stage. “Tell me what’s going on, kids. I’ll handle it from here.”
Marcus looks at you for the go–ahead and when you nod slightly, he turns to the White House press agent. “We think Sam Chase did this deliberately.” He explains quietly, not wanting the conversation to go beyond the three of you. “Vanessa D’Amario is his personal assistant and apparently his soulmate.” The older woman’s eyes widen in surprise. “She says that Chase personally booked this venue and she booked the vendors. I think he set this up, knowing we were considering this place to force some kind of public ‘they are pushing their weight around’ accusation.” When it’s voice out loud, it sounds like some kind of conspiracy theory, but he knows it’s true.
“Interesting…” Annette looks between the two of you and offers you both what she hopes is a reassuring smile. “If all of that is true, which sounds alarmingly plausible, by the way…well, it means doing a little politicking of our own. Are you two going to be okay if a little press leak happens ahead of your party?”
“Whatever we need to do.” Marcus agrees easily and then looks at you. “What do you think, sweetheart? I think we’ve been on the defensive long enough. Time to play a little offense.”
“There was going to be press coverage for this party anyway, so why not?” You shrug slightly “Do whatever you think will help, Annette.”
“I’m on it,” she promises, disappearing again in a flash with a wink and a thumbs up.
“Well, if anything, we can prove when we sent out the party invites.” He reminds you with a shrug.
“Annette seems to have it in hand.” The best you can do right now is shrug and check your watch. “Your parents, my siblings, and the first carload of our friends should be here soon.”
“We are a little bit behind, but nothing we can’t deal with.” He promises.
“At least I can hear the band doing sound check.” That in and of itself is a huge relief. It means things won’t be too behind schedule. “Let’s go see who’s here.”
“Of course.” Marcus grins at you. “Maybe we stop by the bar and grab a drink to calm our nerves.”
“Slow sipping,” you agree with a nod of your head. “It makes me extra relieved that we have those charcuterie tables as part of our appetizers. Even if the caterers get held up with the other things, people can graze.”
“You loved that idea and I have to admit that it’s a good one.” He steers you towards the lovely little alcove that the beer, wine and cocktails will be handed out from. The bartender is already set, since the venue provides ice and he is handing you drinks in no time.
The first to arrive are Marcus’s parents. Matthew and Donna practically smother the two of you in hugs immediately, so glad to be here to celebrate that they’re buzzing. How handsome Marcus looks in his suit, how lovely your dress is, the perfect warm autumn night for the party, they’re just delighted to be there and a balm of positivity over your soul.
Marcus points his father to the bar while his mother coos over you with a proud smile. Donna Pike absolutely adored you, it was evident from the way she always asked about you and reached out to you without him as an intermediate, wanting to forge a relationship with you separate from her son.
“We’re so glad you were able to come up on short notice.” It’s a relief (one of many tonight) to have such a good relationship with your fiancé’s mother, and you walk with Donna toward the bar with Marcus walks ahead with his father. “We both would rather have waited on the party than do it without you here.”
“The good thing about what I do is that I can teleconference when needed.” It’s not something she employs all the time, but her only child’s engagement party warranted the change of pace.
“We’re grateful.” Especially now that their presence is a calming balm over both you and Marcus. “And I thought…while you’re here…I was hoping to ask a small favor of you?”
“Anything.” The answer is immediate and doesn’t need any consideration. “What do you need, sweetheart?”
“I was hoping you would be willing to come to lunch with me tomorrow,” you glance up at her with a small smile. “At the White House. For a little wedding planning.” It’s both to include your future mother–in–law in planning that she will not be close by enough to really take part in, but also to have your family around you for an afternoon. “My grandmother’s wedding dress has been passed down and I’d like for you to be able to see it. You know, before any decisions or shopping or anything happens.”
“Oh…” she exhales softly, tears immediately making her eyes water and she nods. “Absolutely. It would be— of course.” She insists. “I would be delighted to come to such an important event.”
“I know it will be hard to have you included in most aspects of the planning,” you explain, wanting to make sure she understands how much you’ve thought about this. “So I wanted to have to you included in the most important ones.”
“And I would have understood if you hadn’t included me at all.” She folds you into another warm hug. “Thank you. And I have something for you.”
“Oh?” In all the commotion you can’t think what it would be — after all, you and Marcus had specified that gifts were not necessary in your invitations for tonight.
She pulls back and reaches into her purse for a card. "I know that we aren't supposed to bring gifts, but..." She looks fondly to where her husband and son are at the bar talking and smiling. "It's the groom's family's responsibility to take care of the rehearsal day and I want you to plan exactly what you want."
“Donna.” She knows very well that you and Marcus are doing well in your careers. Well enough to be able to build a house and plan for a family and all sorts of other things. “You really didn’t have to.”
"Yes we did." She tells you with a small smirk. "You have made Marcus completely happy and that is worth more to me than the national debt your mother inherited."
There is the barest moment of pause before you snort, and you and Donna both bust out giggling. “Well, thank you.” You’ll open the envelope later with Marcus, but for now you give her a very tight hug. “I’m sure everything will go smoothly. It’s just the nerves of everything.”
“Anything else we can help you with?” There’s the briefest flash of unhappiness on your face before you hug her and she knows it’s nothing between you and Marcus that caused it.
"Not at all." Their being here is wonderful, and they're helping financially when they're not obligated to. That is more than enough. "Why don't we grab you a drink and we can take a look around. The view from here is beautiful."
“You have chosen a gorgeous venue.” She marvels, even as the people working continue to bustle around to put the event together.
After procuring a glass of the same spiked hot apple cider that you're drinking for Donna, you turn to look around the lawn with her and actually let yourself smile. "We were here for a day out after our goddaughter was born and we fell in love with it," you tell her. "It was perfect, so we dove in and talked to their event coordinator that day."
“It’s a mixture of homey and sophisticated.” She admires. “I think it’s very fitting for the two of you.”
"I think that's sort of the vibe we're going for with everything," you admit, sipping your drink beside her. "Comforting and fun Americana, but a little sophisticated."
“I think that you’ve nailed it, love.” She agrees, taking a sip of her drink and humming in approval.
"I'm really glad you're here." And while you know that isn't something a lot of people say to their in–laws, you count yourself as lucky. "And I'm just as excited for tomorrow as I have been for tonight."
“I am too.” She admits with a grin. “I am just happy to be included.”
**
On the edge of the lawn, nearest the parking lot, Annette has intercepted the first batch of friends and family to arrive with a plan and a spark in her eyes. "Alex! June!" She knows the First Children well, and Sydney Badillo as well, flagging down the new mother and her husband when they get out of their car. "I'm very glad to see you all."
“I wonder what this is about.” Juan murmurs to his wife, taking her hand after he rounds the front of the car. “I don’t know.” Sydney frowns slightly, knowing that you hadn’t said much about Annette doing the publicity for the party, but it’s unusual to have her meet them out in the parking lot. “But we will find out.” She murmurs before sending the older woman a warm smile. “Annette! Lovely to see you.”
Alex’s soulmate David, his brother Noah, and Junie’s soulmate all pile out of the cars as well, followed closely by the arrival of Marcus’s cousin Selena and his friends that had moved to DC. This is Annette’s army assembled, and she smiles at the large group. “I wonder if I could ask a favor of all of you?” She poses, knowing there will be a few skeptics in any group. “We’ve had a little mix up here tonight but everything will go smoothly will your help.”
“What happened?” Alex demands, aware more than Junie about all the negative press surrounding you and Marcus lately. He and David both agree it’s a smear campaign.
“It’s not necessary to go into deep detail,” Annette insists. She doesn’t want anyone being pointed or cruel tonight. “But there is someone trying to claim that Birdie and Marcus stole this venue from them for an event tonight. They don’t have any proof that they booked it, of course, but I suspect they’ll try to go to the media with a story for the morning. So I was hoping I could get all of you onto your social media accounts tonight with positive posts from the party and a few mentions about how excited you’ve been for this?”
“Done.” Junie immediately agrees. “I’ve got photos of the invitations to the party when I opened them. I’ll post those with the ‘it’s finally the day!’ theme.”
“We’re on it. A hundred percent.” Alex agrees, glancing up at David and getting a nod from his partner. They don’t have to be told to know who is behind this, and they’re going to do their part to stop the stupidity.
“Do we have an official Insta for Birdie’s wedding?” Junnie asks. “Or should we tag mom’s White House account?”
“Definitely tag the White House.” Annette nods, but she chewed over the question. “But we should do a tag for the event, and maybe a tag for the First Kids? What do you think?”
“It is our sister.” Alex muses. “We should also do a tag for the engagement. Something like fairytale2017 or something as equally disgustingly cute.”
“Maybe we could think of something unique and a little catchy?” Sydney suggests, pulling out her phone. “Something we can use through all the events?”
“Birdie&Marcus’TilEternity?” Junie offers, a slightly dreamy smile as she thinks about soulmates. Since discovering her own, she’s become more of a romantic.
“It’s a little long…” Alex chews on the thought. “FirstWife2018? Like a reference to being the First Daughter?”
Sydney laughs softly, shaking her head. “It would work,” she admits with another laugh. “Except he’s been married before. So technically she’s the second wife.”
“We will come up with something.” Annette agrees. “May I text you all when it’s decided.”
“Of course.” Selena nods her head along with several of the others. “We already have a group chat for planning their combined bachelor/bachelorette party. We can do a version of that group that has you in it, too? In case you need us again.”
“That would be perfect.” Annette agrees. “I will not text without a good reason, I promise.”
There is a little bit of back and forth conversation, but Alex adds Annette’s number to a new group chat with everyone involved and renames the new group Mythbusters with a giggle.
“Oh that’s good.” Sydney snorts when the welcome text pings through and quickly responds with who she is so Annette can associate numbers with names.
“It’s the Congressman, isn’t it?” Selena asks, saving Annette’s number to her phone like the others.
Her brow wings up, nothing getting by the friends and family you have, but she doesn’t answer in the affirmative. “We would just like to get ahead of any potential issues a quickly as possible.”
“That’s yes, in White House Staffer,” June translates for anyone who isn’t familiar. “And I can finally say with glee that something about that guy always felt off to me.”
“I tolerated him.” Sydney admits. “I know Birdie would huff, but he just always was so smug. I wanted to slap him.”
Alex offers here a high five for that and Juan nods in agreement while Annette bites her lip from saying anything unprofessional. “How about something cheeky?” She suggests after a moment, when the murmurs about disliking Congressman Chase have subsided. “The press called her the First Princess after she and Agent Pike were photographed dancing together. Maybe we can do something with that?”
“#PrincessPike2018.” Sydney supplies immediately and Juan chuckles. “They will love it and she will be a tiny bit embarrassed when it trends.”
“Which is perfect.” Selena agrees. She’s taken to this new group of friends like a duck to water, sense of humor included. “We can also do a plain and simple #PikeWedding2018 for all the event photos we’ll end up posting.”
Juan nods. “Well, the official day should have the hashtag #WhiteHouseWedding2018.” He offers.
“Perfect.” Annette agrees with that right away. It’s good social media coverage in every way. Let’s use #PrincessPike for anything relating to Birdie as a bride, #PikeWedding for planning and events, and then #WhiteHouseWedding for the day.”
“That sounds like a plan.” Everyone nods as Sydney answers. “We will start posting things now. Tagging them and Monticello for the engagement party.”
“I appreciate all your help.” Annette steps away, as if she is releasing the group into the wild. “We’ll nip this in the bud and have fun doing it.”
“Is there anything else we can do?” Junie asks seriously, her hand in her soulmates and looking determined.
“Help your sister have a great time.” Annette tells her seriously. “Right now she’s a bit stressed, and nervous. Just go celebrate with your family and she’ll feel better being surrounded by it all.”
“That’s easy to do.” Alex grins. “Come on, Junie.” He chuckles. “Let’s go lovingly bully our older sister.”
**
"Baby, come here. You have to try one of these." The catering company had agreed to tweak their stuffed mushroom recipe to meet the one created by the Kennedy family's personal chef as written down in his cookbook, and the result is absolutely stellar. "Tell me this isn't the best stuffed mushroom you've ever had in your life."
He hasn't strayed from your side for more than a few steps, so it's easy to come closer. Grinning as he opens up for you to feed him one of the stuffed mushrooms, closing his eyes in utter delight as the flavors burst on his tongue. "Oh god, we are keeping the leftovers, right?" He moans.
"Absolutely." You grin and giggle a little that his face matches yours perfectly. They're little bites of heaven. "I have half a mind to have these at the wedding, too."
"We should." He agrees quickly, picking up another bite off the table and offering it to you since you sacraficed one of your mushrooms for him.
Without looking, he has grabbed one of the little cornbread cups filled with pulled pork with has been your other favorite bite at the beginning of the party. You hum around the delicious choice and sigh happily. "Everyone seems to be having fun. And the band is great, thankfully."
"They are good." Marcus has been impressed with the range of songs they can play, but it's to be expected for a good wedding band. "I'm so glad that tonight has gone off with little more than a slight hitch." He leans in and kisses your cheek. "Everything worked out."
"Fingers crossed that the rest of the night runs as smoothly." It's almost time to start dinner, which will surely come with a couple of speeches but should be a beautiful meal. This catering company is fantastic and the two sisters that run it deserves as much recognition as you can possibly heap on them. They, along with the band, will hopefully get lots of coverage from the White House.
"It will." Marcus doesn't mention that there is the best security that could possibly be provided by the Secret Service at this event. He pecks your lips. "Tonight is amazing and it will continue to be so."
"Are you sure about that?" Having not seen her in a while, it is a surprise when you glance past his shoulder and see Vanessa approaching from the corner of the lawn.
Marcus hisses a quiet sigh and squeezes your hand. "I'll ask her to leave and then I'll have someone escort her out." He tells you quietly, waiting for you to agree with a quick nod before he moves to intercept her.
"I come in peace." Vanessa insists, holding up a hand briefly as though it were a white flag.
"I'm not sure that I believe that." He admits, not calling security over simply to avoid a scene. If he can get her to leaving willingly, it would look better.
"I just came to tell you that my vendors are packed up and we're leaving the premises." She's feeling deflated and frankly embarrassed by being stuck in the middle without any kind of life preserver. The shouting match she had with Sam over the phone inside the Visitor Center did not help. At this point she just wants to go home and open a bottle of wine.
His brow lifts in surprise, sure that she would once again insist that this was their venue. "I have to say....I'm surprised that no guests of the Congressman have shown up." He comments quietly. "It's…almost as if they weren't invited."
"Please don't prod at me." Vanessa huffs, shaking her head slightly. At this point being kicked while she's down would be deserved but humiliating. "I just spent forty minutes making phone calls and having arguments. I have no idea what happened, but it's–it is what it is."
"I'm sorry." Marcus apologizes and bites his lip for a moment. "Why don't you join us for a drink?" He offers, motioning towards the bar. "I'm sure you could use one?" He wants to know what has transpired but he also wants to prove that, despite everything, you and Marcus are not her enemy.
"That...doesn't feel appropriate." It's kind of him, but Marcus is kind. That is part of him. "You guys enjoy your party. It...it looks nice. And the hashtags are a cute touch. Very media friendly." Vanessa sighs again and her deflation happens all over again. "I should...I should go. There are campaign events to plan. Even if this one sort of...imploded."
"Listen...." Marcus frowns slightly and looks over at where you are watching him with avid interest. "I know that we are kind of on opposite sides of the sand, but Birdie and I— we aren't— we don't wish you and the congressman anything more than happiness." He offers softly.
"It's all a little complicated," she admits, though she doesn't relish it. "Sam feels so strongly about this whole situation having two sides but I have to admit that I feel like that attitude is starting to do more harm than good."
"I think it is too." He agrees, nodding and offering her a small smile. "If you need anything..." The offer dies, unspoken, but it's there in case she needs it. Vanessa bites her lip and looks conflicted so Marcus takes that as his cue. "Have a good night, Vanessa." He offers before he turns back to return to your side.
"Is everything okay?" There wasn't any shouting or any real fighting that you could see, but Marcus looks upset when he comes back to you.
“Yeah, it’s good.” Marcus reassures you, rubbing your shoulder and bringing you closer for a kiss. “I think – I hope – that she’s starting to see the light in this entire situation.”
“Some cracks in the shiny veneer of it all?” You feel bad honestly. Vanessa might be blindly loyal but she never seemed outright cruel to you.
“I think so.” He hums. “She desperately wanted her soulmate, so I think she justified a lot in her mind.”
“I feel so bad.” There are a lot of people in the world who suffer in different ways for want of their soulmate, and Vanessa might not be your favorite person but she still doesn’t deserve to have that kind of pain.
“I do too.” Marcus admits, but he shrugs. “No one ever said every soulmate match was good.”
“I’m just glad I have you.” Your arm around his waist and your head momentarily on his chest are so grounding and so incredible calming. Just because you could weather the storm of the old without him by your side doesn’t mean you ever, ever want to. Not anymore. Not now that you know how much better it can be. “I love you, Marcus. More than words.”
“You are part of me.” He promises. “My soul, my heart, my thoughts.” He smiles softly, unaware that the moment is being photographed and posted online with the captions declaring true love was real.
“I’m stealing that for my wedding vows,” you chuckle softly, admittedly because you’re so choked up in the moment.
“Steal away, sweetheart.” He kisses your forehead and sighs, letting the problems of the day fade and just reminding himself that everything is perfect now. He has you.
______
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divinebunnii · 1 day
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long / personal story ~ tw: ed recovery
these two photos are almost exactly 3 years apart. I struggled for my entire life with an eating disorder caused by my own chronic pain and physical ailments. it got very hard for several years trying to even maintain the small amount of weight I did have, but my ribcage hurt because my skin was pressed so tight to the bones, my arthritis in my knees and hips was unrelenting in pain, sleeping was impossible because my sides would just go numb.
then I found out I have endometriosis, a painful disease that overwhelms the ovarian tubes and uterus and I decided to put myself on birthcontrol to get that pain under control.
then slowly, i started having more of an appetite. they mentioned I might gain weight, and I cried at the fact that there was hope for me to have meat and squish and phat. I kept the light off in my bathroom so I didn’t have to look at my progress, all I did was open a tumblr blog and started taking photographs to chart and track as well as find a community of sex positive and lovely souls.
3 years, many different deactivated tumblrs, and that one picture of the left that is the only reminder from then just how small and malnourished I was. this one picture that shows just how tight and painful being that thin is, one picture that I now have to look back on and smile at the body I tried to take care of, and finally returned the favor when I could take care of just one pain.
on the right was today, my thighs don’t have a space between them anymore when I stand, my hips and knees have more cushion so my arthritis doesn’t act up as much, my curves are here and real and squeezable, my ass oh boi my ass is the phattest it’s ever been and I jiggle when I walk now.
Struggle lasts a long time sometimes, but when we finally are able to get just one thing under control, a lot of other things fall into place. I may not be able to eat everything I wish I could, but that’s just part of being an adult and taking care of my temple. This body loves me, and I love it, and will continue to nurture and grow with it ~
thank you to all of those that have known me these many years, to those that have uplifted and supported my growth, and a huge smooch to those that are still on their journey, are just starting, or haven’t begun yet. we got this ✨
~ okay to rb ~
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2hoothoots · 2 days
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So I was going through your blog (again) and found some of your stuff mentions fsau Raz having ADHD, as somebody with adhd I’m intrigued, may I have some of those headcanons (canons??) related to that? Also, I would give “a penny for your thoughts” but I’m out of pennies, so here’s various images of a drawing of ur blorbo I put next to my animals, note that a rock had to be added in one picture to keep him from flying away (BONUS: his now permanent place with the wifi guardian frog)
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NOTHING brings me more joy than seeing physical drawings of these guys, like, out and about. in situations. thank you for this gift, and ALSO for the great ask because it's a perfect chance to ramble
so first of all, canon Raz having ADHD is very real to me. he's constantly fidgeting and moving around, getting distracted by sidequests and scavenger hunt objectives, always talking to himself out loud, gotta write everything down so he remembers it because there's so much to DO!, running away from home because his dad yelled at him one time and now Raz assumes he must hate him forever... i could go on, but i think there's a lot of room for interpretation there!
in my headcanon, he never got diagnosed as a kid. maybe there were some notes about it in his reports each year, sure - but a little hyperactivity and distractability never seemed to slow him down. he excelled in lessons and on missions, and when he was with his family their performances gave him something to focus that energy into. it was only really when he turned 18 and graduated to a full agent that the cracks started to show.
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because there's a big difference between the responsibilities you have as a minor, and the responsibilities you have as an 18-year-old living away from home! one who's expected to cook and clean for themselves, and take care of adult life stuff, and also work the 9-to-5 office job he's just graduated into that involves sitting in front of a computer and write reports all day.
short-term, he found he could get himself to power through a deadline with energy drinks and psi-pops (a lot of psi-pops...)
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long-term, something had to give. he was working himself to exhaustion, constantly stressed, swinging between days spent staring at his computer screen doing nothing and all-nighters desperately trying to finish his paperwork before the deadline. it just didn't make any sense to him. he'd finally started his job as a Psychonaut, he was living independently like he'd always dreamed, he'd gotten top surgery after planning it for so long. he should have everything he ever wanted. why wasn't he happy?
following a deep post-surgical depression, about a month before his 19th birthday Raz was living out of his car, couch-surfing or sleeping in his office. he got kicked out of his apartment after falling behind on bills and rent. it wasn't that he didn't have the money, it was all just too much for him to stay on top of.
he'd probably have stayed in that misery hole for a lot longer if Frazie hadn't marched into his life and demanded he let her help him move into a new place, or she was telling mom that he was homeless. together, they sorted through all of his possessions from the last place - everything that had been hastily shoved in his car, or tossed in a box in his office, piled in a heap that was giving him anxiety even looking at it.
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things do get better for him from there.
when he eventually explains things to Hollis, she gently suggests that he should get a roommate. he ends up moving in with Phoebe, and they become pretty good friends after a couple months! something about having another person around to help do the chores and wash the dishes and share the space helps, even if it takes him a while to admit it.
he gets his ADHD diagnosis, and finding the exact right medication and dose is a journey he's still on years later - but they're a huge help in getting him to actually knuckle down and finish his work on time. and the whole thing ends up being a chance for him to take a step back and really think about what he wants to do with his life. he'd always assumed that being a Psychonaut was his dream, but he'd never really reckoned with what that dream would look like before.
in the end, he sticks with it, but also decides to follow Lili's example in branching out. he applies to study a part-time Bachelor's in Psychology on a remote course, and gets accepted. juggling missions and paperwork and study and relationships (because the whole thing made him realise he also wasn't setting aside any time for himself, and wow, dating is a thing) is a lot - but he manages to figure it out, day by day.
(Lili comes back to the Psychonauts after graduating. she and Raz have both changed a lot over those four years, but on their first mission together they hit it off like a house on fire - and the rest is history!)
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persnickettes · 22 hours
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War of Faith fics!
So @stultiloquentia told me to link my fic here on Tumblr! In truth I've been remiss about sharing my complete War of Faith obsession here, but I am so, so obsessed. This show isn't even stealth m/m romance, as far as I'm concerned, it's just a straightforward BL about these two and their intense smoldering obsession with each other, masquerading as political idealism, but no one here is fooled, I mean look at them look at them
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like if you haven't watched show yet you're sleeping on not only one of THE best c-dramas in recent memory, with stellar acting and edge-f-your-seat action and layered writing and intricate direction and absolutely gorgeous production design, but one of the most satisfying queer subtexts of any show ever.
um. which is to say i have been trying very hard to make this fandom happen by way of writing fics in a variety of shapes and sizes, and i haven't linked any of them here yet but if anyone would like to read them, here they are!
All fics are Shen Tunan/Wei Ruolai.
Out of his system. 1,269 words. Just a short scene and a quick bit of shenlai suit kink because i couldn't take their blazing UST anymore. Written after episode 8, which was 5 eps before the show actually gave us canonical shenlai suit kink?!?! This show, I swear. I swear!!!!
Wedding night. 3,385 words. Written after episode 16 and the epic staircase wedding ceremony. Just taking things to the obvious next level.
Ask a Manager: My boss is showing blatant favoritism to my coworker. This is just a silly meme I wrote based on the actual AAM blog before Congyun's longsuffering got kinda sad actually.
of a feather. 5,657 words. Kind of a pre-canon AU that posits spy!handler Shen Tunan, meeting a teen Wei Ruolai. Cue mutual obsession. I was so obsessed with this headcanon, I had to write it.
鵬程萬里. 1,130 words. A sort of stream-of-consciousness ramble from Ruolai's pov on becoming half of an intense soulmate bond, look i didn't say any of this was restrained.
Okay and here finally is an actual fic fic, except not because it started out as just a series of 5+1 sketches and then became a fic in the second half despite my best efforts.
So I guess when I say I've been "writing fic" for this pairing I just mean I've been frantically coughing up loosely formed ideas hoping something sticks and might inspire other people to watch this show and join me in this pit because holy christ this pairing is off the chain— hot, sexy, mutually obsessed, so fucking smart and competent and obsessed with each other's briliance, so completely capable of trading who doms who in the relationship while equally capable of forming a lifetime lifestyle dom/sub partnership, 100% society elite power couple while also rough-and-ready rivals having intense soulmate bond sex in-between trying to fuck each other over for social justice, just an OTP for the ages.
sigh. just. shenlai everyone. SHENLAI.
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lune-redd · 1 day
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Hi! I discovered (or I guess more accurately rediscovered because I've seen a bit of it before but not much) this blog yesterday and I'm going to be real with you, I cannot articulate the amount of pure, unfiltered joy your art and PPG AU bring me. Every time I so much as think of it I get a big dumb smile on my face, and NO OTHER ART that I've seen has EVER DONE THAT! Everything about it, from the style, to the writing, LITERALLY EVERYTHING ABOUT IT is just made for me and I cannot thank you enough. When given the time, I promise I'll draw stuff for this, it's too good not to.
Now, as an actual question (and this may have been answered elsewhere but I haven't read too much here), how exactly did Blossom determine what to use to make what would become Beam? From everything I have read, the ingredients appear to vary at least somewhat from the original recipe for "the perfect little boy/girl" (even beyond Chemical X or Chemical-X-infused blood (which is one of my favorite details)). I got that impression from the mention of "his ingredient" under one of your older posts with Beam, which kind of implies there's some other thing mixed into them? I was just really curious as to how that ingredient (and possibly others) were determined. Was there research? Trial and error?
Ayyy thanks so much for the kind words!!
I think I have gotten this question before about how Blossom figured out what to use for Beam. I dunno know how the Professor would've known the ingredients he chose would 100% work, but then again that's from a pre-existing nursey rhyme so I figured he would have known from there. I think Blossom would've carefully chosen the ingredients for Beam, making sure they're something sweet and cohesive like she and her sisters' were, and unlike the Rowdyruff Boys' gross ingredients and Bunny's randomly picked ones (I guess that sort of answers the research question?)
I was originally thinking of Beam being made out of only one ingredient (one ingredient for each girl/boy), but then again Bunny was one girl who was born out of multiple ingredients, same with Bliss in the 2016 show (as much as I like to ignore that one). We tried coming up with a set of ingredients for him in STATION but I dunno if I'm satisfied with them
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oursystemblog · 18 hours
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is wishing you could be a system a symptom of being one? i was reading your blog yesterday and i got very very sad, and other system content will often make me sad because i relate to feeling like, in system terms, an original personality/memory holder who is too sad and traumatized to function and doesnt want to front, only its like i always have to be me no matter how much i hate me, and hate existing. so as a result i just dont function really. i relate to stuff you said about shutting down when in too much distress, like going emotionally numb, and i also dissociate a lot. but even when my mind is on something else and im acting different, its not really like switching to a different mode of awareness. i think it might be better if it was. i wish i was an alter so i could go dormant forever. im scared that its too late to completely rehaul how i conceptualize... living, thinking, being, etc... im scared i have to be me forever. im not sure this is a normal or appropriate way to feel... and im sorry for asking something so emotionally loaded too. i dont even know what im asking really... i guess just, if you have any advice, and if you ever felt this way before you realized you were a system, and how you realized. thanks if you answer. sorry
Hi, i wanted to try and write a helpful response however it ended up being Way Longer than i expected to say anything substantial so it's under the cut
I can't really give a 100% certain answer to your question—Symptoms like emotional shutdown and dissociation in response to stress/trauma are also possible without necessarily being a system, ultimately I can't say whether or not you are one (it took me a while to even say whether or not I was one haha). I personally didn't have the experience of wishing i could be a system before i figured it out, but I think I've heard from some other systems that they did experience that; I suppose it's different for everyone.
i'd try to give a more helpful response about how i realized i was a system but i actually don't remember very much about it—I guess I was always aware that I had an "other state" of myself with Very distinctly different mannerisms from my own who was pretty consistently "triggered out" by specific situations (the other state was also aware of themself like "oh, i'm in This Mode again"), and then eventually i thought "that might not be normal actually" and started researching about dissociative disorders some more
Regardless of whether or not you have alters/are an alter, I don't think going dormant would solve the problem, even though I absolutely understand the feeling. While we were still discovering our system we were in a pretty bad place, and when we discovered our own emotion-holder she was very angry and sad—which scared me initially, and i Kind of Wished that she would disappear or that I could just be A Normal Regular Singular Person. A while later I calmed down and realized it was not productive to wish things like that, so I tried talking to her and telling her that it was okay to feel angry, but that things can be better now than in the past and we are capable of healing—treating her with compassion
I think having a conversation with A Literal Part of Myself that held our anger and sadness was helpful, but I also think it's possible to do something similar even if you're not a system—to treat yourself with compassion too, I guess is what I'm getting at here.
I didn't think it would get better, but it did. I mean it took a while and there were ups and downs , but as long as you're still here it is never to late to learn to live again and to recover
Ultimately, everyone's circumstances are different and maybe what helped me doesn't apply the same way to you, but please try to remember that things can get better. Healing is possible, i wish you the best
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achaotichuman · 3 days
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Personal Rant
TW- Discussions of attempted rape, homophobia and transphobia.
I just got back from church, unfortunately I have to attend lest I risk disownment from everyone I have ever known or loved, and I need to share my thoughts out loud, or I am going to literally explode.
First and foremost, if my brother (for example) came home and told me that his boss had tried to force him to have sex with her, to the point that she grabbed him and tried to force him down. Then he had to shove her away and leave his coat behind because she had grabbed it, I would not be congratulating him on resisting the temptation of sex, I would be calling the police and filing a report for attempted rape.
Joseph's story of being forced down by Pharoah's wife, and just narrowly escaping is not a story that shows how he was a man of God who refused a temptation from the devil. It is the story of a victim of attempted SA and systemic oppression. He was then thrown in jail because Pharoah's wife claimed he had raped her. That isn't the story of him trusting in God, even if he was later released and appointed to a higher position of power. I am certain if we asked Joseph, he would not want to go through any of those trials again. They were not proof of his loyalty to God; they were the result of him being preyed on by a person of higher authority.
The fact that this people are trying to sell this story as a great act of resistance against the temptation of the devil, and not the heartbreaking story of a victim who was not given justice until literal decades after is disgusting to me.
Latching off of this, they tried to make out like Joseph nearly being raped is a good example of resisting homosexual impulses. One commentary from someone was likening homosexuality to being a diabetic. In her words "If you have diabetes, that isn't your fault, but that means you should steer away from eating cake because that isnt good for you."
Basically, saying being gay is an illness like diabetes, and not a genuine part of a person. When talking about being transgender, all anyone wants to talk about is that some people 'identify as animals and that's disgusting.'
I'm transmasc, and I have to sit there and play the part as the pretty cishet young woman who serves god and agrees with everything being told.
I am sorry but tonight was my final straw because how fucking dare you liken Joseph escaping being SAed to a person resisting their natural urge to be themselves in the name of your god.
If you asked any of these people about being cishet, they would answer with God created man and woman to be together have relations with each other. Agreeing that wanting to be with someone and have sex with someone is an extremely natural thing and is a big part of their person.
But somehow that doesn't apply to gay people. Somehow, they simultaneously say that people are genuinely born gay, but at the same time that 'doesn't have to be a part of their person and they can resist it'.
And they claim to be completely non-hypocritical, and only speaking the truth of God.
Anyway, sorry for this, I strive to not post that much personal stuff because I want my blog to be an escape from the real world. But I needed to say this.
Please, if recognize the religion I am talking about here, do not put it in the comments. And please no one start arguing with me on these points, this is my venting and not an open topic.
I also wanna say thank you to everyone who interacts with me on this site, you guys have been my lifeline this past couple of months.
Okayyy I feel better after typing this, bye bye!
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front-facing-pokemon · 10 months
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cerise-on-top · 3 months
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Hello!! How would tf141 react to a very sassy reader? Like sassing them out for no reason what so ever?
Hey! Like this, I think!
TF141 with a Sassy Reader
Price: He can appreciate some good sass, as long as it’s appropriate. God knows how often he’s been sassed by one of his soldiers, especially Gaz, so he doesn’t mind it, to some degree. You can sass him if you want, he’ll sass you back if he can think of a comeback that’s fitting. However, if you sass him for the sake of being mean to him instead of trying to get a good chuckle out of something, or maybe making a situation less dire, then he won’t be as appreciative of it. Don’t get me wrong, Price could shout at you if he really wanted to, but he’d much rather make you feel some guilt and remorse for inappropriate behavior. Although it’s fairly rare that happens, it will happen if you get on his nerves too much. Will then ask you if you think what you said was really appropriate in such a situation. You can then apologize still and all will be good as long as you keep your mouth shut. Once he’s calmed down, you can crack a joke at his expense again. Again, he’s used to such things as a captain, but keep it professional and stay polite, for the most part, and you won’t have a problem with him.
Gaz: He sasses you right back. He’s not particularly afraid of authority as long as they’re up for some good natured fun. So it really doesn’t matter if you’re above or below him rank wise. As soon as you open your mouth and some sass leaves it, he’ll immediately have thought of something to say in retaliation. I wouldn’t be surprised if you small sass battles could go on for a while. It’s a game to him, the first person that doesn’t know how to respond anymore simply loses, end of story. Will slightly mock you if you did lose, though. After all, you use such big words, and then you lose to him of all people? Surely, you can do better. It’s not impossible to out-sass Gaz, but he always has something stupid to say if he can, so it would take a while before you could properly beat him at his own game. He doesn’t give up easily either. Even as the conversation is about to be over, if he can think of something to say he’ll just say it. Sort of ends up looking forward to talking with you, sometimes he just needs to be a little shit who runs his mouth without any consequences. Sassing Price sometimes brings consequences with it, but not with you. With you he’ll be as lightheartedly mean as he can be.
Ghost: He’s been shit talked so much, he doesn’t really care anymore. He’s a scary and intimidating guy, so naturally people have something to say about him. However, most of them usually don’t have the courage to say anything like it to his face. So yeah, he would be a bit surprised if someone actually did sass him for a bit. Would go quiet for a moment, processing that someone just said something mean to him. When he wants to be, even Ghost can be a bit sassy himself, though in his case he usually just ends up sounding mean more so than anything else. Will “sass” you back when he can. It’s a bit intimidating from someone like him, especially since his sass borders on threatening, but you can be sure he won’t go through with it. He just really wants to see how far he can push this entire thing and what he needs to do in order for you to stop running your mouth and cower in fear as well. That never comes, however, so he ends up sassing/threatening you a bit as well. I could see you becoming buddies over this, it’s really rare for someone to talk to him like that. It makes him smile when you can think of an especially good comeback. Might sass someone alongside you, if they really deserve it.
Soap: He definitely has some fun with you. Although he can be quite sassy himself as well when he wants to be, he usually just hops on the jokes of other people. Sees you sassing him as some kind of challenge, so you can be certain he’ll challenge you right back. After all, if you can run your mouth then surely you can prove yourself as well, right? It’s all a competition in his eyes and he’s somewhat of a sore loser. Though, if you really are all talk and there’s nothing behind what you’re saying, then he’ll get Gaz involved as well, thinking that, because his buddy is very sassy himself, there will be some fun sassing going on. He’s usually right, but he still stands by what he said: You should be able to prove yourself after everything you have to say. Soap doesn’t take too kindly to being sassed for no reason whatsoever. He will take you up on what you said and will have you do it better than he does. If you are better than him, fine. You get to run your mouth as much as you want, he can’t really complain then. However, if you end up being worse at something than he is then he’s earned every right to sass you to hell and back instead. It’s all fair in his eyes. If you improve you get to sass him again, but good luck.
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unicyclingdogs · 7 months
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wind!!!!
this wasn’t supposed to be a redraw, but it’s very similar to an older drawing I did, so I’ll put it under the cut so you can see the difference :)
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and this drawing isn’t even a full year old yet; i drew it last november‼️ i really think i improved a lot this year and yeah 👍
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slavhew · 2 months
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Hello!
If you're not too busy, would you mind listing some of the things you think count as death flags for Mr. Spender?
There's the obvious fact that he's the "old" mentor to group of young protagonists, but what else do you think would count?
OHH BOY ok so I'd think I'm a crackpot for this but since we're talking about Zack "Foreshadowing" Morrison. I have some thoughts
No harm in leading with the (chronologically) first thing that jumped out at me:
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This one IMMEDIATELY made me antsy whenever I came back to it after my initial read, and considering Zack has referred to it on twitter in the past as one of their favorite jokes it's definitely not been forgotten about.
Second, the sheer amounts of near-misses, jokey or not, of Spender narrowly avoiding specifically lightning
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Again, not much, but it's weird that it happened thrice, latter two of which had real gravitas rather than an one-off joke.
And third, Spender himself. He's repeatedly shown himself to be kind of a self sacrificing idiot, as well as prideful to a fault. Granted, it's both him and Mina trying to take on all the responsibility of saving Mayview and its inhabitants from their fate.. But Spender is exactly that right measure of doesn't-value-himself-enough (chest footprint aftercare or lack thereof), having an obscene amount of power (enables his loner act + pride) and poor judgement that has the capacity to put him at great risk. And it has!
Spender has not only shown low enough self-esteem to view himself as the de-facto scapegoat for the safety of the town, but also prideful enough to make very bad calls that end up in people, often himself, hurt (COUGH FORGE INCIDENT COUGH)
This is all conjecture, but it's definitely enough to make me worried about him :') Even if all this doesn't mean he'll necessarily die he's definitely getting (even more) seriously injured at some point. I love the guy but he's so far doing a horrible job of convincing me he wants to live bad enough to circumvent at least that
#not art#admin answers#paranatural#pnat#richard spender#pts-fic-notes-and-blog#before i continue on with tag ramble i just want to say tysm for leaving an ask!#none of my friends read this so ive been stewing on these thoughts for some months and i loved finally sharing them#this isn't exactly proof but the hijack possession seemingly being the final nail in the coffin for his and isabel's relationship.#idk it feels significant to me. thats one more tether to support kinda gone. someone who knows him well enough to know he's unwell#he seems not exactly content but fr incapable of not burning bridges as he is now. and considering how rashly he acts he REALLY needs those#to not do stupid shit all the god damn time with no buffer other than Lucifer. who for his measured approach to rick's hotheadedness#has honestly shown himself to be pretty lenient and kinda bad at controlling spender's more (self) destructive tendencies? so he dont count#to be clear i love spender to bits but he is dumb as rocks and has all the self preservation of a fruit fly. it needs to be said#also the lightning man... idk its WEIRD like especially on the reread its the thing that most consistently threatens him! it repeats#sure he gets chewed by a bat and banged up by forge but?? he somehow always comes back to lightning. catnine has it out for him#its something i didnt even really put together until i continued reading the flashback chapter AFTER getting this ask and went OHHHGNHF#which the only reason lightning is such a non issue is lucifer's powers. which belong to his sunglasses and not to the spirit in him#so its not like they can't be taken away he's just got a really good excuse for having those on all the time#TAGS GETTING SO LONG. ANYWAYS. i hope this is comprehensible lol
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no but why are trans women talking about transmisogyny such an offensive thing to you. you literally arent a trans woman and you dont experience transmisogyny. you can’t argue against that? it’s a literal fact that trans women are demonized and targeted more in society? you’re doing exactly what these “baeddels” are complaining about, doesn’t that make them legitimate? you are straight up offended that other people experience worse oppression than you. why. why do you think that is justified.
Why are you so concerned with who has it worse? Why is trans men talking about their lived experiences, their struggles with the cis-hetero patriarchy, and their feelings classed as "speaking over trans women." This discussion isn't a pie. I am not coming onto blogs talking about transmisogyny and inserting myself into the conversation because it's rude. You would not in fact be having this conversation with me if you hadn't been trolling through the transandrophobia tag looking for something to get mad about.
And where on earth have I ever gotten mad about trans women talking about transmisogyny? Get a life.
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