#the aromantic is confused

[sir-arlieosaurus-lung-struggler]

lmao someone flirted w/ me today (an aroace story time 🔵💙⚪️🟡🟠)

during lunch the last couple days a boy (lets just call him Jay) & his friend group kept just randomly sitting at mine & my groups table (weird cause normally "the boys" dont usually bother us, the guys sit on 1 end of the really long tabel and like 90+% of the other 2/3 of the tabel is gay, I originally didn't think too much of it cause I'm on the very end of the gay sector, it was weird tho cause they asked if they could sit there) anyway Jay & his group sit next to us, Jay specifically next to me each time they sit down w/ us, then get up and leave, then come back. Yesterday Jay didn't bother me much aside from asking what I was doing on my phone but today Jay kept poking me while im listening to music, which honestly didn't bug me much I was just kinda sitting there unamused. The final time Jay pokes me he asks... "are you from Tennessee?" *me not only misshearing it to be "are you with x boy in our grade" but also not getting it after i realize what he said* "... nno-?" "Cause your the only ten I see" then my imidiate responce was "I'm good thanks" 😂

I lost my shit for a good 15 minutes after lunch just cause my reflex responce lmao. It just feels weird tho lmao- like- just that someone would flirt w/ me i guess?? Ik that sounds self depricating in most contexts but for me its coming from genuine confusion?? Like why?? I think my logic is just "i get i look cute, just don't tell me that (unless like were really close friends)" & its weird too cause i cant even tell if they were being genuine lmao the, group was chuckling the whole time but i cant tell what tf was going on?? (I can't even understand whats going on at my table 90% of the time w/ the ppl ik let alone strangers)

Whats even better? I remember Jay from elementary school. we were never friends, barly talked ever, but I remember him cause my moms was friends with his uncle in highschool & they ran into eachother at the store ONCE ever.

All this leads me to thinking: what if someone actually asks me out? Cause ik for like 99% of ppl they'll mean it in a romantic way??

#Aroace rizz #Aro #Aroace #ace #aro ace #the asexual is confused #the aromantic is confused #asexual #aromantic #text post #text #arospec #Aspec #acespec #An aroace storytime #aroace stuff #aroace struggles #Aroace storytime

[aro-and-ace-stuff]

I'm aro and autistic which means that I will talk about romance as a very strange and confusing social and psychological phenomenon, and ask allo ppl questions like I'm in a field research, in a normal conversation.

#aro #aromantic #i put romance under a microscope and i'm suprised and confused and disgusted and intrigued

[hazelcoffeecreamer]

My friends talking about their relationships:

Me:

#arospec #aspec #acespec #ace #aroace #aro #aro ace #aromantic #asexual #lgbt #lgbtqia #lgbtq+ #romance #confused

[meowzet]

hearing [heteronormative] people talk about romantic relationships will never not be confusing

#huh??? #so many rules… and for what?? #beyond confusing #queer #going to tag my lovely aspecs because y’all understand what i mean :3 #aspec #ace #asexual #aroace #aro #aromantic #<2 to you all #i’ll also throw in a #queerplatonic #my meows

[arrows-and-ace-thetics]

Reminder that even if your asexuality or aromantism could have a "different source", if these terms help you feel safe and advercate you needs you can still use them!

Maybe you are a "late bloomer" or "too young to know" but maybe the identity means you can explain yourself better, you can find others who feel the same, you can take things at your own pace. That's OK.

Maybe you're on medication, maybe you have some sort of neurodivergence that is affecting things. If these terms help explain your emotions or how you are "lacking" a certain thing, that's OK.

Maybe you're trans and you're not sure how your dysphoria effects it. Identities and feelings are confusing. That's OK.

Cause for every person who realises the terms no longer fit, there's someone who wishes they used the terms earlier. If you have shared experience, if the terms help you define yourself and protect yourself or hell just give a small sense of belonging that's OK.

You're welcome here

#aromantic #asexual #aro #ace #im just thinking about this again #thinking about young me who was so close to a toxic relationship but had enough safety in identity to say no #thinking of my friends slowly figuring it out #thinking of myself and my confusion over where identities fit together #were ok #were allowed these term #what use are identification and terms if not to help people anyway

[the-aaaaa-battery]

Being aroace but also feeling a tertiary form of attraction (alterous attraction) was one of the most confusing parts of my identity to figure out. Before I knew what alterous attraction was, I only knew sexual, romantic, platonic, sensual, and aesthetic attraction.

I had a crush on one of my friends (and I still do). It made me kind of scared because at that point, I was 99% certain I was aroace, and I couldn't tell if I was experiencing romantic attraction or not. I didn't like the idea of dating and I didn't like the word "romance," and yet I also felt like I wanted to be more than friends with that person.

It wasn't until months after discovering I had a crush that I learned about alterous attraction. I liked the definition and I thought that if fit me best, so I started to use it to describe my crush. I felt way more confident using aroace again, because it felt right! And I had a way of explaining my feelings for my crush.

But oh my God, it was so hard to figure out.

Shoutout to people who are confused about their identity right now! Gender and sexuality is tough to figure out, but it's okay to question.

#lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbtq+ #sexuality #aroace #aromantic #asexual #romantic attraction #aromanticism #asexuality #alterous attraction #demialterous #questioning #queer #unsure #confused

[ivydbomb]

I’ve been seeing a massive influx of Aroace posts. I am Aroace and completely unaware of what’s going on. What poll? What discourse? What happened 😭 do we need to invade another country again? Isn’t it the darn year of the dragon? DO I GOTTA BURN SOMEBODY????

#aroace #aro rights #aromantic #asexual #ace rights #ace #aspec #arospec #aromanticism #aroallo #aro pride #IM CONFUSED HELP

[aromantic-diaries]

There's people who think aromanticism isn't real but my brother in christ i'm not even sure if romance is real but you don't see me bugging people about it

#aro #aromantic #arospec #we are both equally confused by eachother hallelujah live and let live i'm just minding my business

[vroomvroomwee]

As an aroace I have a genuine question: why do people kiss?

It's so weird man. You just mush faces? Literally why? And everyone acts like it's taking you to Heavens doorstep. How? You're in someone's saliva and it's messy and awkward. Why do that when you can gaze into each other's eyes or HUG?

#confused aroace here #ace #aro #asexual #aromantic #asexuality #aromanticism #aroace #aspec

[sir-arlieosaurus-lung-struggler]

the aromantic is confuesed

☆ Aromantic culture is just genuenly not understanding the difference between romantic relationships and platonic friendships.

☆ Fyi: apologies for the plethora of "like," statments, it just feels more natural for some reason. I expect this to possibly get hated on? I dont know, couldnt care less if it dose tho 🤷🏻‍♂️

☆ Like, I just dont understand the concept of cheating. I get its considered bad. I get why its considered bad as its a breach of trust/boundaries/etc, but i dont understand why people prefer to be monogamous as i genuinely just dont see a difference between friends and romantic partners, I get that there is a difference, i respect that differece where people draw it themselves, I just can't see it.

☆ Like, I see the difference between queerplatonic relashionships & friendship, but I just can't distinguish any other type of relashionship & romance for some reason.

☆ And i just dont get why theres a distinction between monogamy & polyamory either? Like, were people? Why not be open to the possibility of feelings not following the preset mold of a random relashionship Hiarchy? Like ofc you can have your own rules in a relashionship, but I just dont get why monogamy with the 1 perfect "other half of you" is the priority vs fulfillment? Like, I don't expect 1 person to be my "other half" for the rest of my life, nor do I want someone to expect that of me cause that just feels like dumping way to many expectations onto 1 person. And like, you can devide yourself amoung multiple friends why not multiple romantic partners?

☆ And i dont get wanting a lifelong relashionship like that? I mean i do get wantinv 1 but expecting 1 i feel is just throwing alot of expectations on anither person, people change, feelings change, alot changes in life. It reminds me of how people are expected to choose what they want to do for the rest of your life as a teenager.

☆ Why r y'all bringing the government into your relashionship? And why do y'all STRIVE for that? Like, "lets officially legaly combine ourselves into a unit and make it real damn difficult if we end up seperating." Why should having a romantic partner logustically help you in life?? Like "hey, these 2 ppl said i do infront of an officiant, lets see if we can improve theyre taxes." How is they're logistically a "making this relashionship official" outside of- consenting parties deciding they're in a relashionship????

☆ Like, everyone was assigned to make a different venn diagram and label it with arbitrary concepts and they're relation/similarities/lack thereof, and its graded on participation; But everyone still argued over the non answer because they just can't fathom they're being no wrong answer.

☆ This isn't really meant to change anyones mind on romance, do whatever tf you want with your relashionships its your life; This is just me being real fucking confused at why people arbitrarily made these catagories lol.

☆ This was origonally gonna be an ask on an aromantic culture is blog but I quickly realized this was gonna be way too long for that.

☆ I may or may not add more mini rants to this in future reblogs this is just what I could think of as I was writing. Thanks if you actually read all of this

#aroace #aro #aspec #aromantic #arospec #aromance #asexual aromantic #aromanticism #romance repulsed aro #romance repulsed #the aromantic is confused #Relashionship #Relashionship Hiarchy #Relashionship anarchy #Aro anarchy #Aromantic anarchy #Aroarchy :> #aspec stuff #aspectrum #aspec community #aspec pride #aromantism #aspec tag #aromanitc #aroace community #aroace pride #aroace spectrum #aroace tag #aromaticism #aromantic asexual

[skull-turtle]

for the LAST TIME, what does "having a crush" even mean

#im so confused #i think i might have a crush #but maybe i just want to be their friend?? #but they make me feel giddy in a way none of my friends do #BUT i wouldn't really mind if they never saw me in a romantic light as long as I get to be close with them #BUT I DO LIKE THE IDEA OF DOING “DATE' STUFF WITH THEM #but i couldn't care less if that doesn't happen #i don't even really want to do anything to make that happen #but if they asked me out I'd say yes immediately #this is something i wouldn't do for my other friend so does this mean this is a crush??? #help #aroace #aromantic #arospec #qpr #mmm crunchy #lgbtqia

[enbeemagical]

normalize being a little bit in love with your friends

normalize being not at all in love with anything

normalize love being confusing and weird as hell

normalize love not being romantic

normalize love not being

normalize not loving

normalize loving in the wrong way

just. normalize being unapologetically yourself

#sleepyposting #i 100% should not be awake right now #i'm a little bit in love with a lot of things and people #aromantic #actually aromantic #lovequeer aro #loveless aro #this post is loveless aro inclusive #cuz it's awesome #it's like being around people who say they don't do bad things bc god says not to and rhen not understanding why an athiest doesn't do them #and by it i mean: being around people who think love is necessary to be good or a person or whatever #and oh it doesn't have to be romantic. and then they get confused by loveless aros and they go #like oh you actually do feel love you just don't call it that. oh you actually do believe in god you just don't call him that #like no actualy #god and love are unnecessary for goodness and personnenes and uh. *draws a big line around everythung* that #OKAY GOGOD NIGBT NOW <3 #i primise #probanly

[aroace-and-has-a-mace]

let aromantics raise the dead

#aromantic #aro #aro people are very cool #not to be confused with aromatic #we don’t smell nice #well maybe we do but it’s not related to us being aro #or is it

[angryaromantics]

There really does come a point when you've been aromantic long enough that you no longer wish you weren't. You will learn to navigate amatanormative society, and you'll carve a little piece out of it where you can be happy. The happiness you find might look different than the average alloro person's, but that's okay. It won't be theirs, it'll be yours. And it's worth the struggle and uncertainty getting there. I promise 🌱🌻

#koko thinkin thots #aromantic #aro #actually aro #aromantic positivity #I'm just thinking about how much happier and settled I've been this past year Especially in contrast to when i was 16-22 dazed and confused #sure I'm still pissed off a lot but there's a joy in that too!!!!!

[fun-k-boards]

I've never understood the excitement around marriage. I've never understood the 'rush' around the idea of a relationship. I've never understood the heartbreak or annoyance people feel when they're alone for valentine's day, or when their partner doesn't give them a gift for it. I've never understood why someone would like kissing with their tongues or on the lips. I've never understood why naked bodies are sexual. I've never understood why I should feel my world shatter when someone rejects me. I've never understood why I should be expected to 'just give the relationship a try' when someone confesses to me. I've never understood why friends will demean someone by implying they just 'aren't good enough' because their friend got rejected by that person, no matter how gentle or respectful the rejection was.

I've never understood why sex and romance need to be brought up and hyper focused on in every conversation imaginable.

I'll probably never understand.

#aromantic #aro #asexual #ace #aroace #acearo #there's nothing wrong with people who enjoy romance or sex by the way #this is kind of just a vent post #i guess? #im sort of just confused about romance snd sex so thats what this is about #to be clear i dont want to experience either #im not at all ashamed to be aroace

[annemae]

As an asexual who figured herself out pretty late (mid 20s) I tried to have a talk with my family about not having ever been in a relationship and not feeling the need to be in one. Unless some criteria are met first - as in me being comfortable to be honest and open - and even then I'm not sure how romance positive I am.

How do others react to hearing this "but how do you know? You just haven't met the right person yet. You don't even know what you're missing "? This is my experience and my body and mind and I feel like I can't get them to listen since they think they know it better. It feels like I'm missing the right words to make them understand. Anyone have experience or advice on this ?

#asexual #acespec #aromantic #asexual confusion #asexuality #asexual issues #lqbtqia