#that goes for anyone reading this just pile on headcanons i want this story so bad

[fuckmeyer]

This is gonna be LONG but I stalk ur blog now. I’ve read ur tags, and I’ve come back for more, Maria discussions, Maria headcanons, and Maria love… Jasper can come along too ig, only because he worshiped the ground she walked on. (His words not mine lol.) Anyways, it’s loving Maria hourz.

I wanna talk about the strikethrough because YES! Maria totally didn’t expect to develop feelings for Jasper down the line but she did. They ARE lovers! I don’t give a damn what Meyer says! I don’t care about all the “Mate” stuff because none of that holds up when you really look at what we are shown instead of told. Their actions portray that of two people who have love for each other and it’s so ridiculous to me that some ppl try so hard to deny that when it’s obvious. It’s honestly so much more realistic and interesting to have them be lovers, and damn what the deniers say! They’re just mad and uncomfortable bc they think Maria will be a threat to their ship but she’s just existing and minding her business lol. Maria deserves to have love and be loved. Latinas in general deserve to be love interests and not just “evil brown seductress”. *eye roll*.

They’re obviously into each other. It’s the only thing that explains their weakness for each other. They’re both known as people who are willing to kill anything that threatens them… except for each other lol.

They spent a few years paranoid around each other knowing they were “planning” to kill, and both parties could have easily done so… they never did the deed and now I lowkey believe they weren’t even that serious about it lol, they were both on edge and probably just trying to scare each other away bc they’re dumb and can’t handle their feelings.

Ppl claim Jasper left so quickly when Peter and Charlotte came back for him bc he was just so miserable and all that, but I think another reason Jasper left so quickly is because he really didn’t want to have to face the possibility of killing Maria and/or he simply couldn’t handle this new sour relationship with her when it was never like that between them before. They were each others closest companion. She’s the reason he stayed so long because he loved her, and being around her… her confidence, ambition, brightness, genius, vibes, and mind-blowing sex was his getaway from everything else and was his only source of goodness when they were both surrounded by war and destruction.

I highly doubt he would have stayed so long if Maria was just so mean, bitterly angry, disrespectful, and violent towards him the way some ppl try to characterize her. To me, logically speaking, Maria is and would have to be hella charming, charismatic, bubbly, hospitable/warm in a scarily insane way for her to have so many followers who are not only afraid of her but are also blindly devoted to her, especially when one of them is an emotion detecting/manipulating empath. If she’s this hugely manipulative person as they say why would she be ruthlessly angry and bitter towards everyone?? Why would anyone follow her?? She wouldn’t have been as successful with & without Jasper if she was just stone cold evil all the time. I think she breathes life into everything she does (even war and destruction lol) because that’s just who she is.

We later find out that Jasper was actually Relieved that he didn’t have to kill her. Imagine that lol. Peter suggested they go back and do so… Jasper said No. He just didn’t want revenge against her and vampires are like, known for revenge in their universe. Like what’s the explanation for Jasper:

1. Being so willing to protect Maria, even from himself.

2. Being relieved he didn’t have to kill her.

3. Rejecting his friend Peter’s suggestion to go back and kill her.

4. STILL not killing her later when she found him in Calgary and ultimately “forced” them to move (still don’t know how), theoretically putting his new family and Alice in danger… He was ready to kill Bella for the slightest hint of danger that she brought, but Maria??? No, she must be spared, she’s just a baby lol.

5. Still being kind/thoughtful enough to wish her well, even telling his friend Peter to relay that message to her if he sees her because it’s THAT important apparently and not just a passing thought to keep to himself…

A lot of ppl like to say Jasper was “saved from Maria”. But not only was Peter okay with Jasper’s rejection to killing her, he was also okay with him asking to tell her he wishes her well, even when they both knew how unlikely it was they’ll run into her. If Peter saved Jasper from Maria why are they so chill with her now? Why not actually go seek revenge? Peter saved Jasper from War and Destruction. Not Maria. Because Maria wasn’t really the core problem like some ppl make her out to be. It was their surroundings.

She’s lowkey still considered a friend. Jasper is so okay with her existence that he’s even thinking of seeing her again to ask for help. Like he’s such a big ass softie for her, even in times when you’d think he wouldn’t be and she’s not his lover??? Make it make sense please!!! Like I said, no man is doing ALL THAT for a woman he doesn’t love. If going to literal war for a woman for nearly a century isn’t enough evidence then this should be… That man loved her (and probably still does) and whoever disagrees is blind.

More: Ppl seem to believe that Maria didn’t care at all about Jasper and had no romantic feelings for him but she literally treats Jasper with the same caution and softness that he does. They’re BOTH weird asf when it comes to each other.

Maria is seen as this ruthless, unfeeling demon… but she had a whole family and a lover before, so obviously that means she’s capable of feeling love and she’s also loveable. Allegedly she’s an evil person who doesn’t care about anyone and will hunt you down and yet, not only did she let Peter and Charlotte go. She let Jasper go too. She put Jasper in charge and trusted him with things I’m sure she used to handle herself.

When Lucy & Nettie betrayed her, I think she became closer to Jasper considering he was the one who warned her and they took them out together. They protected each other on and off the battlefield. When their relationship soured she still couldn’t kill him even tho it was her army, she trained him, and it could have been done without much effort on her part… now if she was this evil unfeeling devil, she would have. But she didn’t. She’s a ruthless warlord who has killed for less, she didn’t trust him at the time and she believed that he was thinking of betrayal like Nettie & Lucy so she had a STRONG motive to get rid of him, and she just waits for a couple of years with only a hanging threat of killing him??? She didn’t really want to kill him and it shows. She didn’t wait that long to kill Lucy & Nettie lol. If she truly didn’t care about him she would have easily and quickly gotten rid of him at the first thought of betrayal. She wouldn’t have waited those few years and if he did manage to escape. She would have found him much sooner and killed him.

Speaking of finding him, why did she even care enough to look him up years later, and decide to visit anyway? (For the record: I don’t believe Maria initially came to kill or cause trouble bc why would she? If that’s the case she wouldn’t have come alone for a whole coven of vamps. She’s too smart and good at survival for that) If Maria is this uncaring person, why would she care enough about someone that is supposedly “disposable” to her??? Probably because he meant more to her than she’d care to admit. I can only imagine/headcanon how badly she was AT WAR with herself over that too. Especially considering how she previously lost her “mate”. I have so many headcanons about how she handled her feelings for Jasper when she finally realized and bbygirl was going thru it! Lol.

Because lbr, she may not have had strong feelings for him in the beginning but she definitely developed feelings for him after all that they went through together. That’s literally the only explanation for her actions with him. We are told she’s more ruthless/dangerous than Jasper yet she’s literally let him get away with so much and still thinks about him and she’s CONFLICTED about it! Which is gonna be yet ANOTHER conversation that I’m totally gonna return to your inbox for lol. I love angst, love, and complicated things between these dumbasses who clearly have unresolved feelings for each other. They are SO interesting and their story is so powerful. Like imagine what JasperxMariaxTherapy would look like. 😭

TLDR: Maria was the one that got away and Jasper is not over her.

👏Latinas in general deserve to be love interests and not just “evil brown seductresses.”👏

María & Jasper were mates! to quote a wise bestie (i.e. you):

no man is doing ALL THAT for a woman he doesn’t love. If going to literal war for a woman for nearly a century isn’t enough evidence then this should be…

to me the whole "lost her mate" & the "never treated him as an equal or thought of him as her mate" biz was thrown into the guide just to make her look like a non-option for Jasper. canon paints a different picture. vampires mate for life, but nowhere does it say they can only have one mate. you never "get over" your mate... but you can always make room in your heart for more love. (RIP Marcus but girl you gotta get outta the house). & that's what María did without realizing it! girl is so traumatized & focused on war, she probs fell in love & didn't even notice. then when she did she got scared of her feelings & tried to run lmao stupid baby i love her sm

The Saga of María & The Major

if i had to guess the progression of their relationship (PASS ME THE MIC LMAO) i'd say it went roughly like:

María turns Jasper

he impresses her w/ his gift & his military expertise. he wins. they celebrate. she rewards him with responsibility. he loves that he's serving a purpose & loves feeling needed. she loves that he makes her feel accomplished & in control

more wins. more victories. he's her major. she's his queen. they're in love with victory & bloodshed & war. they're toxic, they're powerful, they're young gods, they're partners. always late-night strategy seshs & early-morning briefings. always on the same page in combat. they break off & do solo missions together. they only hunt with each other. this is a v normal relationship

they get to know each other (of COURSE María is warm & bubbly & charming; she may be a warlord but she's a leader first) & find out they had similar thoughts & values in life. they hated the upheaval of their lives caused by invaders (ok Jasper), they hated feeling like losers in war, they are very driven & goal-oriented. flirting is involved?? wow, is this friendship??? (no, this is patrick)

there's a romantic spark. Jasper feels it. he knows she feels it but wonders if she knows it ykwim? it feels amazing but he keeps it to himself. then one night (late night hehe) María accuses him of using his gift to make her attracted to him. oop. girl OUTS HERSELF as having a crush on Jasper &, even after he insists he never used his gift to make her feel things (true), GETS MAD at herself for having feelings & kicks him out. goodbye loser. except...

she hates having a crush! she cannot stop thinking about him & he knows it! she feels like she's replacing her mate! she can't concentrate around him! he's her major & it's inappropriate! he can taste her attraction all the time! why is he the only one who gets to taste! she wants to taste him!

THEY FUCK

also they kiss

a lot

they sneak around & keep things buttoned up on the battlefield. HOT. we love a forbidden romance

María gets scared of the intimacy bc she's María (feelings? no entiendo). which is around when she finds out what the Civil War was really about. ew. he's basically a colonizer. she thought they had similar experience vis-a-vis war but he's a colonizer? ew.

she's disgusted. she feels like a fool. she's angry at herself for still having feelings for him. she feels oddly like a hypocrite considering she purges all these newborns. she maintains a professional relationship. cold. distant. he hates it. he reaches out. several times. says he wants to understand. ok

[you want to understand? here's all this rage & pain & grief over what the white men did to me & what Benito stole from me & this is how i felt when i was displaced from my home & my family whom i loved more than a lot of things & people who are NOT YOU; keep telling yourself we're "so similar" bc you lost your "way of life" & bc you also had to witness the deaths of your friends & family whom you loved more than...other people you may (have) love(d). p.s. fuck you (metaphorically) p.p.s. next time it's on sight.] she's a professional & he will never understand. get back to work. GOODBYE LOSER x2

except... she depends on him too much. vice-versa. they're partners. they're toxic. they can't untangle. the war effort suffers. he's desperate to win her back. things are weird.

then one day he finds out Nettie & Lucy plan to kill her. fuck. now she needs to kill her covenmates. too old for the bullshit. Jasper offers to help. she takes it. grudgingly. she's DISTRAUGHT but so traumatized she's doing what she does best & closing herself off from the pain.

except Jasper knows better. after the deed is done & she retires to her chambers he goes in with her. & as soon as he starts prodding she cracks & unleashes all this pent up emotion. this is a whole different María. Jasper has never felt such deep emotion ever. or so many emotions at once. how does so much emotion fit into such a smol lady??? science is still uncovering the phenomenon

& underneath all that pain & anguish & exhaustion & fear & hate & disgust, Jasper feels love. raw, aching love. for her family. for her past. for her country. for her life. for him. he will drown in her before morning. sometimes you just gotta hold a girl & cry with her

OHP THEY FUCK PT. 2 ELECTRIC FUCKAROO

WOW actually openly being in love engaging with your emotions is kinda rad (& scary). María can really reflect on her life & herself. like maybe this war isn't the end all be all? maybe there's more to this life than revenge? maybe for the first time she can see her future on the horizon? maybe saving Mexico is futile bc war is never-ending, & maybe if she didn't spend all this energy killing she could spend more energy loving...

& maybe Jasper feels that way too. maybe that's why he's depressed. maybe he's just as tired as she is. maybe he's losing his mind over all this death. maybe he feels trapped. maybe he resents her. maybe he hates her. maybe he's plotting to kill her. maybe she should kill him before he kills her because even if he didn't kill her he would definitely kill her just by killing her because she loves likes loves him & she can't let him go even though he wants her to which is why he's going to—

oh.

jasper left.

she won't need to kill him after all. jasper left. he didn't want to kill her. he just wanted to leave her. alone. so he left.

jasper is gone.

...oh.

***

The Calgary Incident

Speaking of finding him, why did she care enough to look him up years later, and decide to visit anyway? (For the record: I don’t believe Maria initially came to kill or cause trouble bc why would she? If that’s the case she wouldn’t have come alone for a whole coven of vamps. She’s too smart and good at survival for that)

first: let's acknowledge the fact that the Cullens weren't able to detect María until the last second & that a coven of seven with THREE (3) gifted vampires was too scared to take on one (1) María. QUEEN

second: María DEF wasn't there to harm them bc 1) wtf does María care about Canadian territory? 2) if the Cullens were her enemies they would already be dead.

she's there for Jasper. probably not to ask him for advice/help. she got by fine without him. María being María she's also not going to come to him like "i'm still in love with you."

that said, she IS a ride or die. if she thought Jasper was in exceptional danger she would warn him. the Volturi likely have their eye on María & (for other reasons) the Cullens, & she got wind of it. she was looking out for him, & maybe even hoping for better diplomatic relations Just In Case. even if the Cullens naïvely believed their happy little (powerful) family wasn't being watched, María knows better. she's careful, calculated, & she knows the Volturi will make trouble for the Cullens (& by extension her) in the future.

Jasper is also a ride or die. & him telling her to "keep her distance" is to protect HER. not him. not Alice. not the Cullens. bc he knows "keep your distance" as a threat/warning is pointless. girl will do whatever the hell she wants. but he also knows she put herself in a vulnerable position to find them. he knows if the Volturi weren't watching her then, they certainly are now that she has visited the up-and-coming Cullen coven. "keep your distance" is akin to him saying "take care of yourself."

this, & "tell her i wish her well," is the closest they will get to saying "i still love you."

but they don't have to say it. they already know.

#maría my beloved #happy loving maría hours everybody #anon i love you #su-angelvicioso #(still tagging in case she sees this lol) #also PLEASE give me any/all headcanons & if you think this relationship should go a different way I NEED TO KNOW #that goes for anyone reading this just pile on headcanons i want this story so bad #sigh #twilight #twilight renaissance #twilight headcanon #jasría #jasria

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

I can’t BELIEVE for the nights and days of life is over, I was starting to think that novel would last forever.

I hope you all are ready for the fact that it’s not over here on my blog, as my 5-5 ass is not done with it yet. In that respect, here are the chapter ten notes. No spoilers in the comments for me and any people who haven’t read yet, or are for some godforsaken reason, reading along with me.

And @mochalottie u are a queen and my favorite, I’m so sorry for taking so so long to read your work and being so bad at responding to your dms, I’m at the stage in adulting where every text from anyone seems like a monumental task lol. I’m trying to manage time better and respond better. It doesn’t help that I work in a high school so it blocks tumblr!!

Onto the for the nights and days of life chapter 10 notes! Happy Halloween all!

-The way I feel like my own children are growing up too fast when I hear that Spider and Neteyam aren’t sitting with Mo’at in the infirmary much anymore. 

-Ur fighting my Jake and Mo’at spend an insane amount of time gossiping headcanon. Ur simply spitting on it. Just think about it, just pICTURE it. Mo’at’s grinding up a paste and Jake sneaks in like “…Have your heard about what happened with Moe and Ninat?” and Mo’at goes “JAKE SULI I would never talk behind someone’s back. Tell me everything.”

-Hey, Neytiri being like unable to acknowledge Paz as Spider’s mom? Banger. It really gets to me. She’s like well fuck off that’s my kid all while doubting herself. But Mo’at's right baby Spider was Neytiri’s number one fan from day one, he was literally always a momma’s boy.

-Also because you mentioned the kids taking an afternoon nap, I wanted to take a moment to just highlight how hellish that year or so where Neteyam, Kiri, and Spider were done with naps and Lo’ak still needed them was. You know his ass threw the bIGGEST tantrum every time it was time for a nap and everyone else was still playing. He was enRAGED because no one has fomo like Lo’ak. The kid was feral, crying overtired tears simply insisting that he is absolutely not tired and does nOT NEED A NAP.

-Spider being in the sleeping pile is one of the things that makes my heart grow three sizes every time I read about it. But you made it 20 times worse by adding in that by himself he spreads out for safety but he feels safe in the pile, like I’ll kill myself.

-I literally can prove Spider always asks for banana fruit and I’m starting to become convinced it’s the only fruit he knows.

-Lol Norm and Max sitting on Earth absolutley fIGHTING over who has to tell Jake things are going BadTM. 

-Lol I just literally kNEW that Neteyam wanted to make Spider a present, and yet instead his gift to him was even more of a complex. 

-YOU CANNOT TEASE TARSEM LOVE STORY TO ME. ALSO I’M NOW ASSUMING HE’S GAY THAT SCENE READ GAY. 

-This is what both Jake and I thought of when Neytiri told him to keep his secrets:

SHE QUOTED THAT MOVIE ALMOST BAR FOR BAR MAN, IF I WAS JAKE THAT WOULD’VE SENT MEEEE. When I was younger I used to have to share a bed with my cousin on family vacations, and I’m telling you bitch is possessed. She sleep walks and sleep talks, and sleep assaults me in my sleep. But one time she fucking quoted The Princess Bride and the next morning when I told her I loved that movie, she told me she’s never seen it. I have never felt more fear for my life. Picture Jake struggling to explain the plot of Lord of the Rings, his ass has seen it, his twin was a nerd. 

-Jake as soon as his child needs comfort: Oh fuck, I’M the only one here!

-Spider, like 7: I won’t be able to mate dad. Jake: I have to go. I’m not ready for this.

-HUMANS ARE BACK, time for things to get a little fucking sad. I know I’m ALMOST twenty chapters behind and you guys are already in it, but I’m just getting started baybeeee.

-Also I love Spider calling his parents Ma and Da, your Irishness has crept in.

#the spookiest thing of all is me posting notes #miles spider socorro #spider socorro #spider sully #neteyam sully #mo'at sully #jake sully #neytiri sully #paz socorro #kiri sully #lo'ak sully #norm spellman #max patel #tarsem #fic recs #melissa does notes #melissa og #melissa on avatar (cameron) #fanfiction

[teacup-tyrant]

Can I offer some unsolicited advice to writers about when to post fics so people will read them?

I'm a marketer by trade so making sure I get eyeballs on the content I'm writing is not only a fandom hobby of mine, but it's my actual job IRL.

Someone made a post here about the times to post to Ao3 so they hit the right time zones. There used to be some kind of glitch there but apparently that has been fixed. But it's a good roundup post about some general tips and the important callout is that the best days to post are Sundays & Mondays. (which I find hilarious bc Sundays are worthless in business marketing and you generally want to post Tue-Thurs. But I digress.)

Now let me add something that content marketers refer to as newsjacking. That means something newsworthy has happened or a certain topic goes viral and people are currently paying attention to it, so you push your own content in relation to that. Obviously, there are ethical and unethical ways to do this. Don't push your brand in relation to a tragedy and try to capitalize on something awful. That's just a dick move and then you'll probably need to add reputation management to your marketing team's plate because you just got cancelled.

But lets relate this back to fanfiction. Here's an example.

The fandom I've written the majority of my fics for got some news the other day, and there hadn't been any news around the series in months. Suddenly it was trending again. If anyone wanted to drop a new fic, this was the time when the most eyeballs would be on it because everyone has been flooding the tag and paying attention again.

So ask yourself, did your series just finish airing or a new book get released? Perfect, publish a fic because people will be wanting MORE. Did a highly anticipated trailer just come out? Awesome, everyone will be making gifs and edits and craving content. Join in and publish a fic. In these instances, you're capitalizing on people's attention.

This all isn't to say hoard your fics like a greedy dragon until there's a sudden explosion in your fandom. But IF you want to be more strategic about when you publish, this is a Professional Opinion of how you should do it.

And you can look at all of this and say HEY, fanfiction shouldn't exist to stroke your ego. You should write for your own happiness and if someone else reads it, so much the better. And you're absolutely right. Personally, my hard drive is full of piles of random headcanons and thousands of words of half finished fics that will never see the light of day because I wanted to write them out of my brain and have no intention of ever finishing them. But the ones that get fully fleshed out enough to make logical sense, well, those are for everyone else. Those are what go to Ao3.

But listen, I'm human. I like being told I wrote a good story as much as the next writer. If any writer tells you that comments and kudos don't give them the warm fuzzies, and that they feel discouraged when a fic they post gets little to no traffic... then they're a goddamn liar.

This is just a way of making an organic algorithm work in your favor.

...because Ao3 has no real algorithm to market to you for profit and that's why we all love it so much. Hell, my job depends on engagement, impressions, and follower count, but Tumblr/Ao3 has none of that available publicly so they remain my favorite websites of all time.

#fanfiction #writing #ao3 #ao3 fanfic #writing advice #fanfic #fanfic authors

[capitaletele]

J'ai jamais lu un journal...

One of my early headcanons about Johnny, which is half serious and half crack, is that he can't read.

(I know, he's supposed to be leaving his name tagged on all the walls of Monopolis, but also kids who can't read at all, or read well, can still definitely learn how to write their names, and be wonderful artists who can reproduce shapes. Johnny was just never taught, back in his shitty banlieue nord school, or maybe he skipped too much for it to stick, or maybe he has severe undiagnosed dyslexia, or needs glasses, which doesn't fit the rest of my story but I love the image of Johnny in glasses so here, take it as a gift from me.)

Anyway, that's why he's "never read a newspaper." And also why he loves comic books, because he can look at the pictures.

So anyway, it goes like this:

Cristal joins the Etoiles Noires in the hangar and figures out that several of them have huge gaps in their literacy education. She has nothing much to do while she's supposed to be hiding out in the hangar, so she takes it upon herself to make Cristal School happen and raise the reading level around here.

Meanwhile, Johnny is always ~~around somewhere while that's happening, tinkering with his motorbike, cleaning his gun, puttering around the car or "taking a nap" (with his eyes open).

At first Cristal thinks it's because he wants to keep an eye on her - is it because he doesn't trust her around the Etoiles Noires? Or because he doesn't trust them around her? Neither is a great option.

But no, one day she catches Johnny peering intently at the bit of wall she's using as an improvised chalkboard, and he's frowning in concentration and his lips are moving. He's hanging around because he wants to follow the lessons, but he doesn't want anyone to know! And especially not Cristal!

So anyway, Cristal confronts him one night when they're in private, and he admits to it, and also lets slip that Sadia knows -- she's been helping him cover for it with Cristal -- but that she also used it to demean him and never let him forget how dumb he was and how much he needed her to make up for it :(

Cristal never noticed because he keeps a hoard of comic books piled up next to his pallet, and she's found him "reading" them a bunch of times. But he explains that he looks at the pictures and makes up his own stories, which are probably cooler anyway.

Obviously, sexy alphabet learning ensues! Cristal helps him practice using his comic books, and she's kind and patient and never treats him like he's an idiot (contrary to all his teachers, and his father, who never missed an opportunity to tell him how much of a disappointing idiot he was.)

Following up on the "he can't write but he knows how to draw his name" idea, maybe Johnny is good at sketching! And he has little notebooks that he pilfers from around town that are full of portraits of the Etoiles Noires and random stray cats (Johnny loves cats, but that's a headcanon for another day) and also Cristal -- Cristal asleep, Cristal smiling at him in the passenger seat of the Jaguar, and mortifyingly for him, many many sketches of half- or fully-naked "Starmania"-era Cristal that definitely predate their meeting and that she wasn't supposed to ever find out about.

But he leaves her little sketches of herself with her name carefully written in block letters underneath, like: CЯISTAL, and it fully melts her heart.

And then massmedia, she of the brilliant ideas, said: "What if Sadia knew he/the Etoiles Noires couldn't read and so she was careless with incriminating evidence of her being a double-agent around, and now that Cristal is here they find out!"

Which is an excellent idea for a way to introduce a fix-it where they get to live out the rest of their days happily on their goat farm :) :) :) And Johnny draws his own comics about their adventures to show their future children, and when Cristal is pregnant and uncomfortable, he reads her stories to help her go to sleep.

#starmania fic #not!fic #johnny rockfort #cristal #sadia

[mackmp3]

002 for Crowley from good omens? if you want/im not too late and someone's beaten me to it

OMG THANK YOUUUUUUUUUU hehe no no one else has asked yet <3

how i feel about this character -

where to even begin??? he means so much to me, like i love him so much and also admire him greatly but also can see when he's doing Not The Healthiest and oughhhh i think i understand what he's doing and why he does things & i sort of find him relatable in kinda of... not major ways?? like i've said this before but he's like a massive dork trying to be cool which is definitely something i can relate to, & the whole standing-outside-the-bookshop-waiting-for-aziraphale in the final fifteen, that is something i would do. - & HIS GENDERRRR and i love his funny little things, his collection of Soul Music in the book, the bullet-hole stickers in the bentley window, how he finds Thee Most Ridiculous outfits to wear and pulls it off flawlessly no one questions a thing, asks Aziraphale to come look at a graveyard in the middle of the night with him, let Zira have his deserts, follows him around the neighbourhood on errands, goes to the movies by himself when he's sulking, drives through a wall of hellfire even though half an hour earlier he was going to presumably teleport to alpha centauri, and all his little moments in the book that just make me love him so so so so much and oh dear that's a long sentence isn't it. lots of love for the man(or otherwise)-shaped being. yeah. hehe

all the people i ship romantically with this character -

can literally only be Aziraphale there is no one else

non-romantic otp for this character -

ngl i think Crowley & Beelzebub were good friends as some point & i think that gets overlooked a bit BUT Crowley and Muriel :D Crowley is very Cool Older Sibling in a way that complements Muriel perfectly

unpopular opinion -

i think the 'oh he has snake eyes he can't see that stars' hc is very dumb and bad. ofc he can see the stars what are you talking about just cos david can't see through contacts & dark glasses IN THE BOOK IT SPECIFICALLy says that demon can see really well in the dark. i think people just like the angst of that one but honestly i think it doesn't add anything to the story & the guys been through enough you don't need to keep piling on additional angst & trauma yknow

otp -

as mentioned before can literally only be Aziraphale, there is no chance of this guy ever having feelings for anyone else hehe

crossover ship (making this platonically)-

i think he'd have great fun with Donna Noble from doctor who. not just because david tennant character but THINK ABOUT IT. Donna is snarky in a loving way and won't take any shit but will always have a laugh and has so much love to give and is so funny & they're both a liiitle bit bitchy in an endearing way & Crowley would LOVE that, they'd be great together oughhhhhhh i just thought of this while i was reading the question this has never occured to me before but Donna & Crowley would be so much fun together heheeeee

headcanon fact -

my headcanon for Crowley is that he smoked for a really long time, long thin cigarettes, for the Aesthetics and general Cool Person Vibes, but also because it's yknow a vice & is bad for you but people like it & do it anyways. (and not ad for him cos a. demon and b. can;t get sick) he'd sit there in a seductive cloud of smoke as Aziraphale pointedly coughed and complained about the smell of smoke getting into the books. he only gave it up when you stopped being able to smoke in restaurants.

also (it's technically canon and i wrote a little fic about this but anyways) i think Crowley does like reading & does read books but he really likes the kind of books Aziraphale thinks are Beneath Him, like fantasy & sci fi & spy novels, same as he likes sitcoms.

look at her she's so silly hehe <33

#thank you so so so so SO MUCH for the ask heheeeeeee #crowley augh i just love him #anyone want to send aziraphale 👀 hehe #rare good omens posting on main #:DD

[turtleplushi]

turtle you are so cool. actually. so cool. so, this isn't a request, but more so just an ask since your art and head-canons are sooooo cool (almost as cool as you) and i am developing a coolness addiction.

you never talk about the meta and gala in the context of something that isn't my fic of pin7's! so what are your opinions on them? i recall you saying you had fanon lore for them.

of course, if you're saving it for a fic or a comic or something you ain't gotta give a detailed answer :)

Thank you! I think you're super cool too! I never thought that anyone would actually LIKE my rambling before, but thanks!!

Well, here you go I guess!

Galacta Knight is incredibly brash, impatient, and just sort of mean overall. He's rivals with Meta and seemingly the exact opposite of the stoic knight. If he lived on Popstar the two would probably be at each other's non-existent throats constantly. Meta Knight on the other hand is calm and collected on the outside, having to be responsible for his crew and the safety of Dream Land. However, he shares a lot of similarities with his rival. They're both incredibly impulsive and their lusts for battle are unmatched, resulting in a lot of... interesting decisions like Revenge of Meta Knight and Galacta Knight maybe blowing up a planet or two? The reason why he was sealed away is still pretty vague and I'm not sure what he did that warrants being put in time jail or whatever.

Speaking of Galacta being sealed away, I think now is a good time to talk about that fanon lore. If you could even call it that? It's mostly just a pile of headcanons I combined into a story. (I was gonna make a fanfic about it but I wasn't really sure how to write it.)

It was going to take place in the anime way before Meta Knight joined the GSA. He would've been the puffball equivalent of an older teenager I think. He also would've been a demon beast and followed Nightmare's orders. Anyways, Meta Knight- or Meta Knightmare in this case- wanted to prove his worth to NME so he tried looking for ways to get stronger. He hears something about an "Aeon Hero" in battle, and is instantly interested in this mysterious warrior. After much research Meta goes on a mission to find Galactic Nova, seeing a lot of planets and people along the way. People who are afraid of him. After he fights Galacta Knight he starts to have second thoughts about Nightmare, and when he wins the duel and Galacta Knight is resealed, he isn't sure what to do anymore. He joins the GSA a while later.

I had more ideas that I could use to continue this, but it was getting a bit too close to other stuff I've read and I didn't wanna copy anyone. I hope this is enough for now though, thank you for asking!

#absolutely flabbergasted that my name and 'cool' are in the same sentence #meta knightmare's design looks kinda like his design in kirby's adventure but with wings #i just realized most of this is about meta #sorry gk #asks #long post

[sevendeadlymorons]

Demon Brothers & How They’d React to MC Breaking a Bone

Broke my ankle on Halloween so I thought this would be a convenient time to do a bone break headcanon :)

————————————————————

Lucifer

When you first told him, he was on it immediately

No leaving the bed, regular check ins, breakfast in bed

Personal butler for as long as it takes for you to recover

Will give you work you missed from RAD

He’d do extra research on how he could help you better

Gets you the best doctor in Devildom with help of Diavolo

If you wanted to get up, he’d be by your side helping you get to where you wanted to go

If you needed the bathroom, he’d wait outside the door and help you get back into bed when you’ve finished

If you need to bathe, but can’t do it yourself, he’ll gladly help and will turn away when you’re getting undressed if you ask him to

If you felt lonely, he’d sit with you and play his music to relax you and just ask you how you’re doing or even tell you stories about him and his brothers

When you’ve recovered, expect him to take a week long nap to recover next

Mammon

Honestly had no idea what you wanted him to do when you first told him about it

Probably just sent you to bed and pestered you every 10 minutes or so to see if you were ok

Lots and lots of research on what you did and how he can help

Wouldn’t think to call you a doctor until Lucifer steps in

Goes out and buys you snacks that he bought with his own money

Won’t tell you he spent his money to get you food though

Brings up some pain meds that Lucifer told him to give you since he’s clueless about this type of thing

Ends up stealing borrowing Levi’s games from his room to play with you if you get a bit bored

If you need the bathroom, this boy won’t know what to do

Awkward shoulder holding to bathroom

Won’t leave you alone, always by your side

If you tell him you need to wash yourself, and you need some help, he’ll become a blushing mess

Won’t open his eyes once while helping you and will be telling you to hurry up

Honestly, he’d probably move in to your room until you feel better

Very happy when you’ve recovered but is instantly back to being his tsundere self

Levi

Panic

Doesn’t know what to do when you told him

Tells you to go to bed, comes in 5 minutes later with his arms full of snacks, anime, manga, games, you name it, he’s got it

Won’t let you go through this alone

Asks several questions to his brothers on how he can help you and what he should do because let’s be honest, this shut in of an otaku has no idea what he’s doing

Will let you lean on his shoulder

Grabs your hand when he’s playing his game to comfort you

Will ask you how you’re feeling constantly

Freaks out and apologises a thousand times if he accidentally touches your broken bone

In your room more than he’s in his now

If you need to go to the bathroom, he’ll be hiding his face in his hands and blabbering nonsense

Eventually will help you when he sees how much you’re struggling

Like Mammon, awkward shoulder holding to bathroom, except not really touching you, just hovering behind you so you don’t fall

Lord help this boy if you ask him to help you wash yourself. You’d probably need to help him after he’s passed out from shock

In the end, Lucifer ends up helping you

Is sad when you’ve recovered as it means he doesn’t have a legitimate reason to cling to you 24/7 but he’s glad you’re better and won’t have to help you to the bathroom again

Satan

Helps you as much as he can when you tell him what happened

Advises you to stay in bed and he’ll be back up soon with medication and water

Sits on your bed with you and strokes your hand to soothe you

Uses a pain relief spell to help settle the pain

Researches how to treat broken bones with you

Agrees to let Lucifer call you a doctor

Let’s you sleep but doesn’t leave you alone, instead, sits in the corner or by the side of your bed with a stack of books to read just in case you wake up

If you do, he’ll read you to sleep, if you wanted

Let’s you play with his fingers or his hair if you get bored and he’s busy reading

All attention is on you if you call for him, no matter what he’s doing

Will bring you some of his homemade food to cheer you up

May even look up human food recipes to make you feel more at home

If you need the bathroom, he’ll lift you up and support you with your arm round his shoulder

Will wait outside your door until you’re done then put you back into bed

Is the one that brings up the fact you need to wash yourself, and will happily help you if you need it

Won’t look if you tell him not to but insists it’s easier for him to help you if he can see where he’s cleaning

Glad you’ve recovered, but has gotten used to the warmth of your room and will often come in to read with you again

Asmo

Fusses you straight into bed when he finds out what happened

Helps you get dressed into more comfortable clothes even if you didn’t ask him to

Spends the entire time that you’re injured by your side, pampering you and chatting with you

Once a week, he’ll insist he paints your nails and does a face mask night

Invites Solomon over to take care of you in his place if he has plans elsewhere

Doesn’t let any of his brothers touch you

Worries about worsening your skin and forces you to sleep early with him, giving you little cuddles, making sure to avoid your injured bone

Goes to Lucifer or Satan for advice on what he can do for you

If you ask him to help you to the bathroom, he’ll hold your hand to support you with his hand around your waist

Will wait outside the door until you’re finished and make sure nobody comes in

Way too excited when you ask him to help you bathe, and quickly ushers you to his private bathroom for more “comfort”

He will not look away if you ask him to, no chance

On the other hand, after you’ve finished, it’s the most relaxed you’ve felt in a long time

When you’ve recovered, he’s thrilled and will immediately make plans for you and him to go somewhere together

Beel

Doesn’t exactly understand how or what you did to hurt yourself but after some explaining, he’s your personal butler

Don’t even expect to walk anywhere now that you’ve told Beel you broke one of your bones

He’s your personal wheelchair for as long as it takes for you to recover

He’ll carry you everywhere, watching out that he doesn’t touch your injured bone and hurt you more

He’ll take you straight to bed and bring you food several times a day to make sure you’re well fed and not hungry

Feeds you the food if you struggle to do it yourself

Goes to Lucifer to ask him for medication to give you

Belphie often joins in to keep you entertained

If Beel needs to go workout, he’ll carry you with him and sit you on a chair so you aren’t out of his sight

Literally never leaves your side, you’re stuck with him

If you ask him to help you get to the bathroom, he’ll carry you to the door so you can go and then wait outside the door like your personal body guard until you’re ready to go back

If you need to wash yourself, and ask him to help, this boy will be flustered but will happily help you if that’s what you want

Very shy throughout the entire process and will cover his eyes if you ask him to

Will help you get dressed if you can’t

Cuddle pile with Belphie at the end of the day, making sure to stay clear of your injured limb

Sad when you’ve recovered but that won’t stop him from spending the same amount of time with you

Belphie

Calls you clumsy when you tell him about your injury

Takes you to the attic so you two can get some peaceful sleep as he believes sleep is the best medicine

When he’s awake, he’ll fetch you food, water, medication, whatever you ask of him

Very protective over your injury, won’t let anyone that’s not Beel or him near you

Invites Beel to help with you often

Let’s you play with his tail or hair if you get bored

If you need the bathroom, he’ll give you that “what do you want m to do about it” look, until he sees how hard you’re struggling and will come to your aid very very quickly

Most likely falls asleep outside the bathroom door

If you need help washing yourself, honestly, he probably isn’t the demon to turn to. He’ll be too busy smirking at you or falling asleep to do anything useful

Beel has to intervene eventually

Wouldn’t even notice you’ve recovered until he sees you walking around by yourself, but he doesn’t care much, he’ll still drag you into bed with him

Secretly disappointed you’re able to leave the bed again

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me headcanons #obey me leviathan #obey me mammon #obey me lucifer #obey me mc #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphie

[obeymedreams]

Sweet as You

Author’s notes: I’m salty that the event will not give me Lucifer and Luke’s card so instead I’m replacing it with sweet headcanons about the essence of the datables’ kisses and what chocolates you’d give, plus a little bit about how you and Luke teamed up to make them! 

Content warning: food, chocolate, candy

Length: 2.4 K

Lucifer

You make a coffee bonbon for Lucifer. The shell is dark chocolate with two streaks of colour painted on—one in your favourite colour and another in his. The filling is an espresso ganache that highlights the bitterness of chocolate and coffee while ensuring the bonbon is never too sweet

Lucifer is both impressed with the flavour and the obvious care you’ve put into crafting this confection. He offers to prepare some drinks so you two can enjoy the chocolate together

Kissing Lucifer is being swept up in each other. It feels like passing by each other in castle walls, then hiding behind pillar to exchange impassioned kisses and whispers of love. The world might be continuing around you, but in that moment only the two of you matter

Lucifer feels clarity when kissing you. Everything else melts away and all that is left is the feeling of your lips and the warmth of your love. Your kisses contain an oasis and Lucifer finally feels like he can relax

Mammon

Mammon gets a fancy gold leaf bonbon that has a glossy shine. And to his delight you’ve gifted him liquor chocolate filled with an expensive Demonus that’s all the rage lately

Naturally, Mammon enjoys the chocolates because they’re fancy. However, the real reason he adores them is that they are proof that, to you, he is someone worth splurging on in both effort and money

Kisses with Mammon are messy and unexpected yet both of you feel like you’ve waited forever for this. The first taste of you isn’t enough, and Mammon becomes addicted pretty quickly. It’s a rush, like betting on a rolling dice or a flip of a card while on a winning streak. He feels like he’s losing all good sense yet so sure this is the right decision

His love for you is neither neat nor compartmentalized and neither are his kisses. It’s bubbling affection that he just can’t contain anymore. No matter how many lies he verbalizes, the blush on his visage and the way he greedily steals kiss after kiss says enough

Levi

You craft a chocolate treat based of a scene in TSL! There was a cute scene between Henry and the Lord of the Shadows where they eat chocolates, sharing one last sweet moment before having to part. You decide to recreate it by creating milk chocolate bonbons with a salted caramel filling, making sure to use a mold which creates the right shape!

Levi is floored. He knows EXACTLY which scene these chocolates are from, down to the page and line numbers. He simply gawks for a while and then proceeds to basically have a photoshoot. When he finally takes a bite, you can see the way his face lights up and it’s worth all the effort

Kisses with Levi are an adventure with ups and downs, bumps in the road, but a treasure chest at the end. When you first kiss him, he’s a blushing mess with brain working overtime to suppress his fight or flight instinct. But in spite of himself, Levi leans in and trusts you because no one treats him with this tenderness

His world is still small, aside from his brothers and Lotan, everything he loves could probably be contained in his room. But your kisses expand his horizons and maybe he thinks it’d be worth it to explore the world a little more, even if it leaves him vulnerable

Satan

You make Satan a combination of brigadeiros and mint discs for Valentine’s day! He enjoys that you’ve made chocolate confections but veered outside the classic bonbons. Satan likes the soft and chewy textures of the brigadeiros in contrast with the crunchy sprinkles and the unique texture of sugared mint atop dark chocolate discs

Satan happily opens the box of chocolate. He admires them for a bit and compliments you on their appearance before popping one in his mouth. He feels both loved and a little smug, Satan knows a bit about chocolate confections, enough that he’s certain you’ve put quite a bit of effort into this, which makes it all the more sweet

Lay on compliments about how he’s just as sweet as the chocolate, perhaps referencing a book he’s reading, and how all that work was worth it for his sake and you might get him blushing

Kisses with Satan are like browsing a library—the nostalgic smell of old books combined with excitement of discovering new worlds contained in pages. You’ve had more kisses with Satan than you can count, but even with that familiarity, you feel like you’re uncovering something new each time your lips meet

Asmo

Asmo knows the value of appearance so you ensure your chocolates look just as good as they taste. You make white chocolate disc in the shape of hearts and adorn them with sugared petals. Additionally, you create passionfruit bonbons with cute heart indents which look picture perfect.

Asmo takes a selfie with you while you each hold a chocolate confection. Sweets for your sweetheart!~ It’s cute. 

But then you bring up how you chose passionfruit for its refreshing taste, so its easy to continually eat the chocolates, because just like the bonbons you’ll never get sick of him! It’s such a small detail but it warms his heart and suddenly you’re trapped in a hug

Asmo’s kisses don’t neatly fit into any single category. He is sweet, masterful and practiced, playful and lets you take the lead, but he is always sincere in his affection to you. Kisses are one of many ways to reaffirm your love

His kisses are like eating an assorted box of chocolates. One kiss is light and flirty, the next is sensual and stroking desire, then another which is teasing and light while interspersed with giggles. Yet all of them leave you with a sweet feeling

Beel

You make Beel a big pile of semi-sweet chocolate bark with variety of toppings, one has freeze dried raspberries, another has almonds, some use hellfire peppers, it’s a whole buffet

Beel plants a kiss on your forehead and thanks you so much for the gift! He begins to dig in to the treats you’ve made and has an endearing content grin the entire time he wolfs the chocolate down. He does his best to remember to offer you a bite too!

Many of Beel’s kisses start off as innocent fondness and true devotion. He loves you and you can feel it in the way he holds you close to him and devours all the affection you give. 

But many of his kisses turn hungry, because he can never get enough of you, the taste of your lips, your sweet moans, the way your hands roam, the puffs of hot breaths, they all never fail to leave him wanting more. His kisses feel satisfying and fulfilling, because you get to indulge to your heart’s content

Belphie

You make Belphie coconut oil chocolates! They’re so easy to eat, he doesn’t even need to chew. You have to be careful to not melt them when making and handle the individual morsels, but it’s worth it all in the end

You surprise him by popping the chocolate into his mouth! You’re lucky he trusts you, if it was anyone else he’d probably have spit it out. It’s easy to bite through and melts to spread a pleasant chocolate taste across his mouth.

Probably muttered something under his breath, but he makes sure to thank you for the gift too, even if he is a little blasé about it. At least these ones aren’t dusty

Belphie’s kisses are lazy little things with missed lips and little laughs, huffs of air, and that smirk that makes you want to kiss him stupid until he can’t pretend to be relaxed. Random pecks in the morning, between naps, before bed, but if you ever ask why, the answer is “just because”

Occasionally your kisses are salvation and desperation. No life, no relationship, no person is without turbulence. Your hot breaths prove you’re alive and breathing, the love your pour into him as your lips meet prove he is worthy of affection, and he doesn’t intend to let go

Diavolo

You make Diavolo white chocolate matcha bonbons! The inside is filled with a smooth matcha ganache that’s a brilliant shade of green. The shells are painted with the rough silhouette of your favourite flower. The matcha flavour helps balance out the sweetness of the white chocolate, making a delicious treat

Diavolo is delighted by the gift and compliments the taste! But he also enjoys the story that goes with it when you tell him your thought process, how matcha has become popular across the world in the human realm, and what human traditions are attached to the gifting of chocolates

He’s already plotting what he wants to give you in return, but for now he’ll enjoy your heart felt confection while making sure to give you a piece

Kisses with Diavolo are like fireworks. No matter how many times you see them, they never lose their brilliance. Even if they aren’t always in the sky, they bring you joy each time you see their bright colours and sparkling streaks

Diavolo intends to indulge you in kisses. Even the short ones, before meetings, after class, the domesticity tickles his heart. But Diavolo’s preference leans to long kisses where the two of you meld together. Everything is you, your unique scent, the way his name leaves your mouth, the way you hold onto him, your taste alone makes him want to dive deeper 

And why stop at one kiss? He should have another for good measure, maybe two, three, four—well now there’s no point counting so you might as well continue

Barbatos

You make strawberry shortcake inspired chocolates for Barbatos. The bonbon shell is made with ruby chocolate with the filling consisting of whipped white chocolate ganache and strawberry preserves. 

The several components merge together to make a sweet dessert and Barbatos appreciates how you use the novel ruby cocoa. Barbatos out of everyone knows how much work must have gone to create these bonbons and makes sure to both savour it and compliment you

Kisses with Barbatos are like sharing a secret. You get special access to a gateway into him, and in these kisses you create a special place just for the two of you

His kisses are almost dangerously good, you swear kissing didn’t always feel this good. But his intensity, the way it’s only the two of you, the mere privilege it is to have him whisper sweet words between gilded kisses, it makes it worth all the wait

Simeon

You make Simeon earl grey tea truffles! You coat the truffles with milk chocolate to create an easy to hold shell. Then you have stripes of dyed white chocolate — one in your favourite colour and another in his. 

Simeon thinks it’s adorable at how your chocolates have become a matching couple item with the coloured stripes. He thinks it’s lovely how you made him tea flavoured chocolate, given how many fond memories the two of you have which centre around a cup of tea

Simeon kisses make you feel treasured. He peppers your face is soft kisses, he cups your cheek gently, and the adoration in his eyes almost overwhelms your heart

His love is all encompassing and you’ve never felt safer than when you’re in his arms. Beautiful lashes fan his cheeks, contended sighs, and underlying warmth. Simeon feels like home and with his kisses, you’re falling in love again 

Solomon

You know Solomon likes cupcakes and poisoned apples so you decide to combine the two! You make him an apple cakepop coated in coloured white chocolate to look like a poisoned apple!

Unlike his cooking, your sweet tastes delicious and leaves the eater happy. You make sure to use granny smith apples to retain some tartness and Solomon happily eats the confection. 

Unfortunately, your sweetheart has also made sweets to express his love for you. Don’t let Solomon give you chocolates back or use a trick to dispose of them! It is not romantic to spend the day puking or sick in bed. Or hey, maybe true love is eating it knowing that it spells out nothing less than doom

Kisses with Solomon feel like an exploration. You get to know him bit by bit and each kiss feels like proof he is wiling to vulnerable with you. Some trips result in airy kisses, others feel like rocky days at sea filled with passion and you’re in danger of running out of breath, it’s always an adventure

Sometimes, you swear you can feel his lips form a smug smile. Other times, he approaches you so gently and the touch of hesitancy, like he can’t really believe he got you, makes you want to shower him with enough love to wash away all doubt. He holds you tight, to him you are warmth and intimacy, and he never wants to let go

Bonus: Making Chocolates with Luke

When making chocolates with Luke, it is best to be sweet with him, guide the angel with soft suggestions without sounding like you’re babying him. Generally, Luke is pretty amendable but he can have a stubborn streak if he feels like he has something to prove

He makes for chocolate confections for Barbatos, Simeon, Micheal, Solomon and you! It’s so cute to see him so excited when he thinks about how happy everyone will be when they receive the gift

You two go through many spoons to check if the chocolate is tempered, rapidly tapping the chocolate to see if it has that snap and sighing when it blooms

By the end of it, you two are a mess with chocolate smears on your apron, but you have nice assortment of shiny chocolate sweets

#obey me x reader #obey me lucifer x reader #obey me diavolo x reader #obey me mammon x reader #obey me levi x reader #obey me asmo x reader #obey me satan x reader #obey me beel x reader #obey me belphie x reader #obey me barbatos x reader #obey me simeon x reader #obey me solomon x reader #obey me luke #obey me luke & reader #lucid dreams #cw.food #cw.chocolate

[vs-redemption]

Soft Sunday: dads

Kuroo

It’s not unusual for you both to wake up in a disheveled mess on a Sunday. You couldn’t get your infant from cranky crying and your toddler was standing on kuroo lap and promptly informed you both that she peed. Right onto the comforter. Nevertheless, Kuroo laughs and leans over to give you a good morning kiss. Which you wouldn’t have any other way.

Osamu

Sometimes your son wakes up early and promptly goes to wakes up Osamu up(even if he only got 5 hrs of sleep last night) to fix breakfast. You wake up to delicious aromas and get your phone out to record your two 5 star chefs in the kitchen. You reward them both with kisses n cuddles after breakfast. Which turns into a family nap pile on the couch later.

Atsumu

Doesn’t matter how tired he is. He will do his best to read his lil princess favorite bedtime story. Except this time he falls asleep mid story. You come to check on them cause it’s been awhile. Only to see both hubby and child knocked out. You take a picture and wrap a blanket over them both.

Sakusa

He only awkward around other peoples kids but not his own. His current favorite past time: finger painting with you and child. A lovely mess he doesn’t mind and often looks forward to do on his day off.

Mattsun

A dad that totally indulgent with his baby girl newest song, that she likes to listen to on repeat constantly. Baby shark, a tune he catches himself humming even at work. Only makes him smile because on sundays he gets to learn a new song his little girl wants to sing. Don’t be surprised if singing the latest baby song while dancing with you in the kitchen.

Haikyuu Father Soft Sunday Headcanons (with Kuroo, Osamu, Atsumu, Sakusa, Mattsun)

send in your own soft sunday headcanons

Even as a teacher, I have experienced that dreadful feeling when a kid tells you they peed. 😆 Still, you have to keep a positive attitude about it and if anyone can find the humor in a situation like that, it's Kuroo. The best part is how he's not afraid to get his hands dirty and share in the work of raising your munchkins. He'll take the toddler to go get cleaned up while you take the blankets to be washed. Teamwork makes the dreamwork in your family!

I will never complain to waking up to breakfast already being cooked! Seeing handsome Osamu bonding with his child over cooking though just makes it all the better. Osamu probably loves passing on his knowledge and it's great for the kid's self esteem to be trusted with helping him out. The pictures and videos you take will definitely be cherished and looked back on fondly!

The image of Atsumu coming home all exhausted from practice, but still finding the energy to sit by his kid's bedside to read them a story is so wholesome and heartwarming!!! Sometimes you find them both snuggled up and asleep, but sometimes you walk by and hear your child complaining. "Papa wake up, we're almost to the good part!" Atsumu will jerk awake and apologize genuinely because story time is one of his favorite parts of the day as well.

Sakusa will curl his lip and glare at other kids for sneezing, coughing, or having a dirty nose, but not with his own child. He'll get right in there with a tissue, wiping their nose, cleaning dirt off their face, or taking care of any other dirty job that comes along with raising a kid. He loves his family so much, the messes don't even really register in his mind because he just wants to take care of you and be there to help out in any way. Sometimes, like with the painting, he'll even get messy himself!

I'm obsessed with the thought of Mattsun humming kids songs at work because they're stuck in his head from listening to them over and over with his child. He's so shameless about it too. People will give him weird looks but he just shrugs it off. He just hopes the kid will continue to allow him to share in their interests even as they get older. It means a lot to him to be involved like that and have a close and trusting relationship.

#obitobrigade💖 #best moot squad #Soft Sunday #Testuro Kuroo x Reader #Osamu Miya x Reader #Atsumu Miya x Reader #Kiyoomi Sakusa x Reader #Issei Matsukawa x Reader #Haikyuu x Reader

[discoscoob]

Okok i kinda worry that maybe we need to reel it in a little with the lokious hate

Like, long time follower-love your blog, got some great sylkie content and oh my goood it gives me life!!!- I’m just worried we’re just spiraling into hating on the other ship and finding reasons to feel morally superior to “the other guys”. Which is exactly what the antis are doing

Yes yes i do agree that the mental health point WAS inappropriate; but the digs at lokius feels inappropriate too. Like…its just a ship. And its just a shipper doing what shippers do (regardless of ship). They made a headcanon that’s not actually canon. Sure we don’t care for it much but i think the actual issue is that they said something that was hurtful to people with mental health issues and not that they hoped this makes sylkie invalid. I can see the whole thing just being some young kid who doesn’t know any better getting a little too caught up in shipper brain and not realizing what they’re saying. I don’t think it should be treated as something to then stamp over all lokius shippers, it doesn’t feel fair and it’s the kinda thing a lot of antis do to sylkie shippers just so they can find reasons to hate them more

And yeah sure i can definitely see a future where kids expecting their ship to be endgame causes a mass outbreak of temper tantrums, i have seen this all happen before. And i 100% think that there’s nothing anyone can do to stop it. But i DO think we can make an effort to ignore it and hopefully stop fueling the antis desire to hate on everything (remember don’t feed the troll rules, it won’t stop them but if everyone ignores them it cuts off fresh meat and they start having to cannibalize their own peers)

I know it’s really easy to fall into it. It feels great to put the other guys down and pretend like we’re “holier than thou” for reading the story “as the author intended” but idk man…it just feels weird to keep talking about lokius as tho the issue is the ship itself and not just a bunch of teenagers getting too stubborn with how they consume media (which if you guys remember your fandom history, has been happening since WE were teenager! Wouldn’t it have sucked to have a bunch of older fans seemingly moralizing against a gay ship we liked “unprompted”?)

Eh idk I’m rambling now i think. But i guess i just worry we’re maybe swinging bats at nests without checking what’s in them because we’re worried we found bees but it could just be humming birds buzzing. I think the issue here isn’t lokius but just how kids are consuming media by looking for evidence to fit their theories and not making theories to match the evidence, as the current generation of teens will always do (because they’re always changing out every few years so we start to see patterns in their behaviors). I don’t have a solution for it, but dunking on them isn’t helping.

(Ps this is directed at all of us and not just specifically you. ❤️)

You’re right I probably got a little bit carried away with myself. However regarding my rant yesterday, specifically the longer one, I wanted to keep it general because I wasn’t targeting it towards anyone specific, rather I just wanted to get my feelings about mentally ill people being in relationships off my chest without trying to make it about any ridiculous ship war because I feel like it was something I was more concerned about within real life than whatever fictional characters do on a tv show. That’s why I kept it out of any sort of tags.

But I understand what you’re saying regarding the l0kius shippers and I mean it seems like just one post here and there when I just want to say something in the moment but I admit it does begin to pile up after a while without realising and I appreciate that can become repetitive.

I honestly do try to keep it at a minimum though it’s just when it becomes something I’m particularly passionate about (and this goes beyond the TV show and the dramas within it) then I do sometimes get carried away with it.

And sometimes when you’re discussing a topic with anons, sometimes it can feel like it lasts days just because I might be answering anons all from one day over the course of a few days just because sometimes I can be slow with answering them all, but I do try to get anons regarding the same topic all answered together if I can.

But I’ll definitely try and be more aware of how often I’m discussing l0kius shippers in particular, and although I don’t really clarify it anywhere though I probably should, I honestly don’t mean to generalise them all and act like they’re all the same.

[lollytea]

If you don't mind, do you have any more Shere Khan and or Bagheera headcannons you would like to share?

DO I???

(You are so welcome!! I get so excited whenever somebody shows an interest in shagheera cuz of me. I live for it!!

I have like a truckload of headcanons about their past and present but I’m saving them for this fic once I get into the mindset to get back to it. Soon I’m hoping! BUT I’ve always thought way too much about Bagheera and Khan so I probably have plenty of rambly thoughts I can talk about!)

— Bagheera was raised by his mother and, to an extent, his great grandfather. Great gramps was ancient and couldn’t really do much to care for a child, other than sit in his chair and entertain the little one with stories of his life back in India. Bagheera would listen, enthralled. Bagheera idolized his great grandfather.

— The world hadn’t been very nice to Bagheera’s mother so, as a result, she kept her child sheltered. She coddled him, fussed over him and was overprotective to a fault. This led to Bagheera being a gentle, skittish, naive and high strung boy.

— He got the biggest whiplash of his life when he started school and realized that other boys were not like him. They were loud, rowdy, nonchalantly rude and played rough. Bagheera struggled a little at first but he eventually adapted, mirroring the ways of other kids so he would fit in better. It was during this time that Bagheera’s personality really began to define itself. He was painfully aware that he was small for his age, clumsy and not very fast or strong and he developed quite a complex about it. But it wouldn’t be forever. He had every intention to improve himself in that department. For the time being, he attempted to compensate with a sharp tongue and a hot temper.

— Shere Khan had been raised with his future already decided for him. Since he could walk, he had been told that he would inherit the family’s business empire and he held a lot of pride in that. However when you allow a child to mentally develop with the knowledge that one day they will basically rule the whole universe, (at least it feels like that when you’re so small and are too immature to fully grasp the reality of your future) it may do some permanent damage to that child’s psyche.

— Shere Khan was spoiled, doted on, put a pedestal, had his parents singing his praises. As their only child and heir, of course he was to be treated like he was special. Because he was. Shere Khan was special. Until he wasn’t.

— If you struggle with your studies, you’re too stupid to inherit the family fortune. If you get upset and cry, you’re too weak willed to inherit the family fortune. If you’re not good at everything you do, you’re not as brilliant as we thought you were. Years and years of mixed messages results in a child who doesn’t know for certain if he’s the most talented boy in the world or if he’s completely worthless. It’s the uncertainty that causes such instability. Shere Khan is cocky, smug, arrogant, a perfectionist, cagey, confrontational, competitive, hellbent on proving he’s the best and terrified of ever being seen as weak.

— Bagheera has had a fascination with books since he first learned to read. Unfortunately your literary options are scarce when you’re dirt poor but he does what he can. He frequents the neighborhood’s tiny library even if it’s limited, he’s reread the books he does own to the point he has them memorized and he collects newspapers and magazines to obtain as much knowledge as he can. Occasionally he’ll gather newspaper clippings of current events and make his own “history books.”

— Shere Khan is deeply interested in botany, though he really doesn’t have the time to focus on it with the overload of other subjects he’s obliged to perfect. His grandma gifted him a selection of bulbs and he likes to grow flowers on his windowsill. He’s extremely proud of his plant work. But that’s a secret shh.

— Bagheera and Shere Khan are almost equally matched academically, with Khan inching just a little ahead. However it’s clear from the start that while Khan is the sharper of the two, he can’t compare to the genuine passion Bagheera has for learning. Despite their smarts, the two boys aren’t really liked by teachers. They and their other four friends are incorrigible troublemakers, with Shere Khan being the most disruptive of them all. And while Bagheera can’t help but be dragged in, he does try to behave himself sometimes. Unfortunately he’s constantly getting in trouble for drawing in his notebook.

— There are a lot of bad aspects of this friendship. Shere Khan is prone to flippant insults and Bagheera’s self esteem is shaky enough as it is. There are times when Shere Khan makes Bagheera feel terrible about himself. And though Shere Khan doesn’t understand the extent of Bagheera’s feelings, he knows he’s making him feel inferior. And he leeches off that insecurity to assure himself of his own superiority. Shere Khan probably wouldn’t be half as annoyingly egotistical if it weren’t for Bagheera.

— However, as time goes on, this more malicious side of things starts to fade into a complicated yet comfortable companionship. It’s odd. Everyone agrees that it’s odd. While the antagonistic vibe never quite goes away, with the two constantly challenging eachother, there are days where they get along fine. It depends on their respective moods. One day, Shere Khan would hassle Bagheera until a fight breaks out and the very next day, they could chat with eachother for hours about their favourite novels and the day after that, there’s a reasonable middle ground of jokingly teasing eachother. No one understands it. Shere Khan and Bagheera never even notice that this is peculiar. It’s just their normal.

— Shere Khan and his family would usually leave for a few weeks every year to stay at their summer home. Bagheera would write him letters to keep him updated on the lives of himself, Baloo, Louie, Haithi and Kaa. Half of Khan’s responses were irritable that Bagheera was pestering him with messages, while the other half was listing words that Bagheera had misspelled. One year he returned a week after Bagheera’s birthday and passed him a parcel wrapped in brown paper and tied with string. It was a pocket dictionary. Shere Khan framed it as condescending, since Bagheera liked big words so much but was so terrible at spelling. He certainly hadn’t expected Bagheera to be as delighted with the gift as he was. But he found himself proud that he had given it to him.

— As opposed to their other friends, Shere Khan and Bagheera were fond of the night. They would often sneak out after dark and meet up for walks around the city. Sometimes they’d talk about everything and nothing, sometimes they would argue and sometimes they would say nothing at all. But they enjoyed it. Both felt the need to wander late at night and neither wanted to do it alone.

— Bagheera really started to grow as a person during his time in flight school. He made plenty of friends, grew in confidence, expanded his knowledge and had the support of his best friend, Baloo through all of it. He also learned some things about himself, which goes without saying. He hadn’t seen Shere Khan in years but upon a little reflection, realizes with amusement and a little embarrassment that his admiration towards Khan was most likely a childish crush. He comments to Baloo that being so interested in a boy who was mean to him was rather pathetic on his part. But a part of him knows that it was probably more complicated than that. Whatever it was, he accepts it but doesn’t dwell too much and moves forward. He figures he probably won’t ever see Shere Khan and while it is a little sad, he will certainly survive.

— Shere Khan also learned some things about himself while pursuing higher education but when it comes to his previous friendship with Bagheera, he opts to think about it as little as possible. While Bagheera was currently becoming far more outgoing, Shere Khan was steadily closing himself up until he was left entirely isolated. It was voluntary, of course. He had no interest in making friends and even if spending weeks without speaking to anyone had its mental effects, Khan was too stubborn to change his ways.

— Just like when they were children, Bagheera would send Khan letters. However, Khan had already made the decision that Bagheera was not to be involved in his life anymore. However he was so starved for familiar interaction, he read every letter and even wrote responses, even if he never sent them. He kept all of Bagheera’s letters in his desk drawer. And then they were moved to a box. And then that box was piled under by other boxes. As an adult, Shere Khan doesn’t quite know where exactly the letters are but he’s certain that they’re still somewhere in the house.

— When the two meet again as adults, Shere Khan comes to the reluctant conclusion that the boy he always showed up in school work, had become a far smarter and well read man than Shere Khan will ever be. And once he does allow himself to admit that, Khan can come to appreciate the person Bagheera has grown into. He’s very impressed.

— Bagheera is comfortable with himself. He wouldn’t say his self confidence is a hindrance anymore, not like when he was younger. But he finds that even as an adult, he often has moments of doubting himself. After being made feel so small for years and years, that sort of thing never quite leaves you. Even in adulthood. And isn’t it strange when the person who made you so insecure when you were children, is now the one making every attempt to build you back up again.

— Bagheera wouldn’t say he’s especially brave or anything. He’s still afraid by little things like thunder and spiders. But upon meeting Shere Khan again, he simply cannot wrap his head around the notion that anyone could find this man intimidating. All Bagheera sees is his old friend, who has taken on yet another mask to make himself seem cool.

— There are things Shere Khan has always known about Bagheera. He’s passionate and opinionated. A bit of a windbag really. As a child Shere Khan had found this annoying. But nowadays, he would consider it a pivotal aspect of Bagheera’s brilliance. Khan wasn’t all that intense about any personal matters these days so Bagheera brought so many new concepts to the table. He activated the side of Shere Khans brain that wasn’t strictly office based. It was a welcome change of pace.

— Bagheera has heard from many people that Shere Khan is apparently terrifying. It’s the icy demeanor, it seems. But oddly enough, once he had gotten used to Shere Khan all those years ago, Bagheera found his nonchalant disposition to be comforting, and now it was even more so. Khan rarely got outwardly agitated or panicky or raised his voice. And for Bagheera, somebody prone to anxiety ridden outbursts, a person like that was most welcome in his corner.

— Shere Khan has noticed that Bagheera carries around a worn, well loved pocket dictionary. Now he remembers giving him one over twenty years ago but it’s not likely that it’s the same one. Years and years go by and even long after considering Bagheera his other half, for some reason Shere Khan can never bring himself to ask. Maybe he just doesn’t want to know the truth. Believing what he wants is nice.

— Bagheera had always enjoyed sketching but it isn’t until his adulthood that he decides to indulge in buying paint supplies. Before long, a once empty space in Shere Khan’s penthouse is cluttered with paints and tarps and finished canvases propped against the walls. He’s particular fond of depicting countryside landscapes. Self portraits too but he’s afraid people will think he’s self centered. Shere Khan simply says if you’re both beautiful and artistic, then self portraits should be a no brainer. Bagheera had to politely ask Shere Khan to stop going to art galleries and showing immense interest in his art to raise the bidding among the rich crowd, as he would really like to see how much he can do on his own.

— Shere Khan played piano as a child. He didn’t remember the act of playing itself, but the obligation to sit at the stool and practice when he would much rather be outside. He associated piano with a lot of negative feelings, so once he had left his family’s home, he avoided the instrument at all cost. However, he accidentally discovered a little later than life that if he wasn’t under any pressure to do so, he quite enjoyed playing. It was calming for him. He liked the music it produced. But he was a bit out of practice. He was uncomfortable with being less than perfect at something and found the whole ordeal of improving oneself to be humiliating.

— Bagheera had a piano set up in their home for Shere Khan’s birthday. On the walls surrounding the instrument, he hung up the first few paintings he had done before he had gotten the hang of the whole art thing. It does take a month or two before Khan is willing to sit in the stool and give it a serious try but once he does, there’s music every evening at exactly 6:25pm. Not perfect music. But Bagheera makes it known how delighted he is to hear it.

— As he gets older and works gets more taxing, Bagheera has a tendency to fall asleep earlier. Usually in the evenings as he’s sitting in his chair and on page 6 of his book. Shere Khan hates this because if he leaves him there, he’ll wake up with a bad back and a creak in his neck, so he has to make the effort of dragging him to the bed. And Bagheera is not easy to carry.

— Shere Khan on the other hand can stay awake for days at a time, usually working and Bagheera hates it. Because not only is this biologically impossible for a person to pull off without losing some sanity, he doesn’t like to sleep on his own.

— They enjoy watching antique auction shows and get into extremely intense debates over it. Usually over the price or how ugly they think said antiques are.

— To this day, they still like to go on late night walks around the city. There’s a different atmosphere now that they’re no longer children but it helps them remember where they started off. And just like always, sometimes, they would talk about eveything and nothing, sometimes they would argue and sometimes they would say nothing at all. 

#im sorry i talk too much there is something wrong with me <3 #i was really losing steam in the second half of this and it shows but i hope the first half is fun #talespin

[randomfandomdrabbles]

Eruri Headcanons

Y’all seem to like my Levi Ackerman NSFW Headcanons so here’s a little piece by me to my fellow Eruri shippers (LeviHan is next!)

Erwin is very understanding towards Levi and his habits carried over from his past. His cleanliness, his standoffish attitude, his reluctance to socialize, things of that nature don’t bother Erwin because he knows exactly why Levi is that way and he loves these things about Levi.

I feel as though they would never make their relationship official, but everyone just sort of knows not to go after either of them. Like, they’ve never said they were a couple, but it can just sort of be seen in their actions.

Levi has shown Erwin little talents of his without even thinking about it at first, but he’s also shown things to Erwin to impress him that he was very aware could be impressive.

One example would be the knife game. You remember the knife game? Where you press your open hand palm side down on the table and stab around your fingers to the tone of a song. Yeah, I wanna say Levi did that around Erwin to try and impress him when they were just starting to get along

It scared the hell out of Erwin because he thought his best soldier was going to stab himself, but he was, and he’d never admit it aloud because he doesn’t want to make Levi do it again, pretty impressed by the end when Levi had no cuts or pricks or stab wounds in his hands. 

Erwin and Hanji taught Levi how to read/write, but Erwin taught him cursive/calligraphy and how to develop his signature for paperwork

He also thinks Levi has a beautiful signature, even though it’s literally just his first name written in a pretty way

Levi laughs around Erwin quite a bit. He finds Erwin to be really funny and laughs at his jokes when they’re alone. 

Erwin loves Levi’s laugh and his smile and tries to get him to laugh a lot. Sometimes, if he’s lucky and being really funny, Levi will laugh hard and it sounds like, to my best descriptive abilities, David So’s laugh

Before they started their not so official relationship, Erwin found himself doodling Levi’s face quite often. After their relationship started, he openly drew Levi while they sat in his office and Levi was amazed by it

He never had anyone draw him before, by the way.

Levi brings tea to Erwin’s office and they sit in there and work together when they have piles of paperwork to get through

Since it’s canon that they share a room, I wanna say Levi keeps little things from his past hidden in a box under their bed and Erwin is mindful not to touch it or let anyone else know it’s there

I wanna say Levi hides a lot of things so no one finds them because of his past and Erwin ends up randomly finding little things hidden here and there in their room

He won’t say anything or move the things found, he just goes about his day because he doesn’t want to make Levi feel nervous about his things being found

Levi doesn’t say that he loves anyone word for word. He says it differently and, with Erwin, he tells him that he trusts him and will follow him to the end. 

Erwin loves to wrap his arms around Levi’s waist and rest his head on top of Levi’s head. He also loves to kiss the top of his head

Levi may beat the fuck out of someone for calling him “shorty” but he loves the height difference between himself and Erwin. Something about it makes him feel protected by his big boyfriend and he loves being manhandled by his big boyfriend during sex

On that note, Erwin was genuinely worried about hurting Levi the first time they had sex, so Levi had to keep reassuring him that he was okay and he could go harder and faster or choke him or pull his hair or anything if he wanted to

Levi never understood why Erwin would give him his clothes when they were obviously too big and what the fuck, don’t you need those clothes Erwin? Then he learned that it was something done in relationships and Erwin had plenty of clothes and fuck his clothes smell good so he just accepted it

Erwin loves to hear stories about Levi’s past, whether they’re sad or not. He gets to learn more about his little lover

Levi loves hearing stories about Erwin’s childhood, especially his time in school.

#aot headcanons #aot #attack on titan #eruri #erwin x levi #erwin smith #levi ackerman #levi #shingeki no kyojin #snk

[get-chazzed]

I’ve been reading your dad Chazz thread and it’s super cute!! I wanna know how does Chazz react when his kids reach a milestone? (First laugh, first word, walking etc)

(( First of all, thank you very much! It's hard to write something you don't have any experience with and it's very comforting to know that it's not a pile of trash (I know I use very extreme words when talking about my writing, do not mind that too much). On top of thanking you for the kind words, I want to double thank you for writing this ask- it's encouraging and nice and it has made me very happy. On to the question c: ))

Dad Chazz headcanon dump under the cut!

For him to be a dad, Chazz needs to have matured emotionally A LOT. Of course he doesn't lose his playful side, but becoming an adult does imply that he can't be the same person he was in high school. Specifically what we need to touch upon here is his openness and honesty with his feelings: it's one thing to tell your friends that you hate them when they know it isn't true, but you can't do that to a child without them taking it to heart. That's something Chazz would be very aware of, so I believe he'd drop his guard around the kids in order to avoid saying anything he doesn't mean. Rather than being a character trait, denial becomes more of a gimmick- it doesn't come from insecurity, rather from acknowledgement of the aspects of himself that he's come to regard as faults.

Now, he's the youngest of three and was clearly never a priority for his parents or for his brothers (while no canon sources confirm this, nobody becomes an attention seeker from being smothered with affection) and I wholeheartedly believe that he's mildly salty about the fact that no pictures of him as a child were ever taken (especially because he's seen Chosaku and Shouji's). So the first thing is: pictures. He takes them and he prints them out. He must keep orderly albums and always write down the time and place in which each photo was taken. He likes to keep mementos and believes it's an act of love to show that he cared enough to do it.

So then, first laugh. That depends. If it was elicited by either him or the Ojamas, he'd be on cloud nine- making his child laugh has to mean he's best father in the world material, right? He'd probably get carried away and do something stupid (fall off the stair on purpose levels of stupid) to keep the child laughing. If it was because of someone else, then he'd just...

... Make that face. Smile fondly and admit to himself that humans might not suck so much after all.

First word. It, again, depends on what it is. However, leave it to him to take two random syllables and decide that the child has spoken. The reaction to that would be a loud scream of glee- possibly chasing his partner(s) around the house to shout about how the baby has said the first words and, last, but not least, calling Atticus (unless he's the partner, of course) to rant about it. Atticus has to know that the baby uttered two syllables that were most definitely not intentionally meant to form a word.

First steps. He does not trust the child to walk without falling over despite them having managed some steps, so while he's definitely happy and had most surely taken a picture to commemorate, he's also anxiously telling his partner to not let the kid walk on their own- they need to be monitored because otherwise they'll fall and no, he doesn't want to commemorate the first hospital stay just yet. Yes, he's a worrywart. What could you expect from a control freak.

In general he'd be very... supportive? As in very vocal with praise. First drawing he gets to hang in the office? A goddamn masterpiece. The kid has to know. They have a future in the arts. It's so good. Chazz could actually cry because of its sheer beauty.

First day at school? He's so damn proud. Fucking show them who's boss. You are, kid. That's fucking right. Punch anyone who tells you otherwise in the face. With words, of course. Your knuckles aren't worth getting scraped over some dumb kid. But yes, also study, it's good for you and Mathematics are far more interesting than they seem.

First bad grade? Eh. happens. He'd tell a story about his first failures- even make one up if the real ones aren't 'bad' enough. He tries to get them to laugh it off because it doesn't matter, he isn't disappointed, what matters is that they keep trying. It's ok to be bad at things. He keeps a recording of the one time he tried skateboarding just so he can show that you can be cool (like Chazz Princeton™) even when you aren't good at everything.

By the way, no, he doesn't swear in front of the kids. He has a really hard time with it. He's very relieved when they grow up and he can finally let loose. First time the kids hear him swearing? It isn't the first time, because they overheard him trash talking Aster Phoenix. They probably tell him it was about time he revealed his true nature. He just laughs because heck yeah, his kids are that smart (it didn't take a genius, Chazz). First time a kid swears? Intimidating glare until he actually goes, bends down and places his hands over their shoulders. "Not 'feck', kid. It's 'fuck'."

#(( that is all i had to say folks #(( thanks for enabling me anon #(( i wish you a good day a happy life and a fat paycheck #(( hope you liked this lil headcanon dump #// asks #// not a word about this (headcanons)

[yellowhearther0]

Idk if your dtsmp live action is an au you already have (and for clarification we're talking like an actors au right? Where the dtsmp is all like a big movie/show and their all actors right?)

Anyway fun hcs about this idea cause yeah of course I'm in love with this idea- who do you think i am? Not a theater kid?

Also if this isn't what the au is then I'm very sorry you get some random ass headcanons for an au you're not thinking about ssksjsj

Wilbur as one of the main directors makes sure that nearly everything they film is used, which is also how cursed lore got added to the story- they have so so many blooper reels

Techno hates his costume cause its so fucking stuffy ESPECIALLY when they had to film for the Manburg War because it was so sunny outside. But if anyone DARES complain with him about it, he makes a complete 180- "What? You don't like my MARVELOUS cape and mask? I look 100× better than ALL of you lot so suck it"

Tubbo and Tommy like to swap out prop food for absolutely cursed shit. A scene where someone has to eat a slice of pie? The pie filling is now 87% toothpaste.

Wilbur Techno and Phil all live in the same area and Wil has to drive Tommy and Tubbo to their houses after shooting so they all pile into one car and scream music on the way home

Karl always shows up late for shoots and so all the lore heavy scenes are mostly done by the time he gets there and so he misses out. Quackity makes it up to him by buying him good food after shoots

The Freindship emeralds weren't actually scripted- the camera just happened to be rolling when Techno gave Phil a birthday present and Wilbur demanded they keep the footage

Everyone goes off script from time to time for flavor, but Quackity does it most often. It's actually led to a lot of really metal scenes with genuine reactions from other actors.

Ranboo is really shy about his acting since he's just been recruited for the show, but Tommy and Tubbo immediately latched onto him. Him and Tommy accidently set fire to one of the sets offscreen and got into a WHOLE lot of trouble

Puffy doubles as her own character and Friend. She wants to murder Wilbur for this decision.

Niki and Puffy are actually dating off set but everyone just thinks they're super dedicated to the bit.

Sam and Bad bake all/a lot of the prop food and off set snacks- everyone loves them for this.

Dream and Wilbur fight a LOT about directing and sometimes the plot will go days without moving because the two can't agree on what should happen since they're both stubborn asses. Its usually a compromise suggestion from Tommy or Techno that resolves it all. Fights are forgotten fast :)

Most people don't know anything other than their own scripts- which means that reactions are more genuine and also...sometimes mistakes are made

Once Tubbo read his line wrong and said something very....not right, and didn't notice for a solid 10 min as everyone tried to keep character bc they didn't know the line was wrong. Tommy just about shit himself laughing when he found out.

Idk thats all i got for now have fun :)

This is absolutely wonderful and i love it so much and i wish this is what the au im refering to was asdfghgfds

#my dsmp live action au is so incredibly bad and cursed #but anyway this isnt what i wanted but it is what i needed my crops are watered and my day has been made 🥺🥰 /gen

[elyvorg]

Kaito Momota: How ADHD Can Be

It’s about time I properly shared a take of mine that I never really talk about in my usual analysis posts, which is my very firm headcanon that Kaito has ADHD. While this is partly thanks to me having ADHD myself, self-indulgence is far from the only thing making me think this. There are so many reasons why this makes every single bit of sense, and this post is going to talk about all of them.

And, see, I don’t want to alienate anyone by having them think I’m about to present an interpretation of Kaito that looks nothing like the Kaito we know, because that’s not it at all. I’m here to talk about how so many of the things that were already abundantly true about him also happen to fit perfectly with ADHD. Really, you could think of it more as me talking about how ADHD actually looks a lot more like Kaito than most people might have realised.

After all, ADHD is a frustratingly misrepresented disorder that’s way more complex and interesting than most people are aware. So not only does it make a huge amount of sense to see Kaito as ADHD, it’s also just genuinely fascinating to think that this could be influencing how his mind works and the way he reacts to things throughout the story. Imagining that Kaito has ADHD could never make him any less Kaito, but I do think it makes him yet another layer of interesting on top of everything else he already has going on.

So even if you don’t have any personal investment in ADHD yourself, I hope you can follow along with me for this. There’s a lot of fun stuff to talk about here.

(Since ADHD is so horribly misrepresented that I can’t expect the average person to know what it really involves, this post is also going to include something of a whirlwind explanation of ADHD itself, in order to help people better appreciate why all these things about Kaito are potentially ADHD things. With that said, obvious disclaimer: I am not remotely a mental health professional, just someone with self-diagnosed ADHD who’s read up a lot about it. Some of this will be from things I’ve read, and some of this will be from my own experiences that I’m now pretty sure are an ADHD thing. My descriptions of these symptoms are likely to be somewhat oversimplified because I’m focusing on explaining this headcanon rather than explaining ADHD itself, so please don’t take this as a definitely-100%-accurate ADHD resource. I’m happy if this can raise awareness of what ADHD is really like, but you should look elsewhere to learn more.) 

Hyperfixations

One major thing that ought to be more commonly known about ADHD is that it’s really not a lack of attention; it’s an inability to properly control where our attention goes. It’s been described as an “interest-based nervous system” – we’ll involuntarily focus on whatever seems most interesting to us in any given moment, regardless of its objective importance.

This plus a reduced amount of dopamine receptors means that when we manage to find something that gives us a lot of dopamine, ie, is fun and engaging to think about, we cannot stop thinking about it even if we wanted to. Our entire lives will begin to revolve around this Thing that we enjoy, thinking about it, doing things related to it and consuming more information on it to get as much of that sweet dopamine as possible. This can often be to the detriment of everything else, including more objectively important matters, because who cares about that stuff when Thing is the best thing ever!?

As an example: as you might imagine, I have been hyperfixated on DRV3 and especially on Kaito for over two years now. I have not been able to stop thinking about Kaito even when I’m supposed to be doing other things, and there’s literally nothing that’s more fun for me right now than sharing all these thoughts of mine with other people. We also love to infodump about our hyperfixations to anyone who’ll listen, after all. That’s precisely why this post exists, along with many more like it on both my blogs.

SPACE 

So, this is perhaps one of the most easy-to-spot signs that Kaito might be ADHD. Because, man, he really loves space. Sure, any astronaut would have at least some level of interest in it, but Kaito is so obsessed with space that he introduces himself with a grandiose space-themed title, wears a galaxy print on his slippers and the inside of his jacket, and simply couldn’t wait for a college degree and had to make sure he got up there as fast as possible.

Granted, it’s not like Kaito talks about space 100% of the time. He is stuck in a killing game, after all, which is also kind of important to pay attention to. But, still, no matter what more-objectively-important things they can push themselves to focus on when necessary, there’s always a part of an ADHDer’s brain that’s near-constantly thinking about their hyperfixation anyway and will take any opportunity to bring it up and make things about that if they possibly can. And, well, Kaito still talks about space quite a lot considering that he’s in a life-or-death situation that doesn’t have anything to do with space at all (at least, as far as he knows for most of the story).

There’s one delightful bit of white noise I absolutely love in a debate in trial 4 where Gonta is suggesting a vehicle could have crossed the river. Someone responds to this with “Like a rocket?”, despite the fact that, A, there were obviously none of those in the Virtual World, and B, you don’t use those to cross rivers. Kaito, you dork, now is not the time. But of course now’s the time, there is always time to be thinking about space-related things, no matter how impractical and irrelevant it might be. Someone has been murdered, everyone else’s lives are on the line – not to mention his illness and the huge pile of inferiority issues he’s struggling with at this point in the story – yet amongst all that, Kaito’s brain still found time to go, “hey, speaking of vehicles, aren’t rockets the coolest!?” And… yeah, that’s genuinely what hyperfixations are like.

Then there’s the time Kaito asked Maki what her favourite spaceship was, like this is just an obvious go-to conversation starter in his mind, because of course he has a favourite spaceship. He has thought a lot about his favourite spaceship (or spaceships; let’s be real, there’s probably several that he thinks are SO COOL and might call his favourite depending on the circumstances) and could fill ages talking about nothing but that. Even though he knows this conversation ought to be making its way towards helping Maki open up about her past – this is one of his training sessions, after all! – there is still a part of Kaito that really just wants to talk about space, because a part of him always wants to talk about space.

We can see this as well in multiple FTE invitation dialogues (those brief lines describing how they hung out before the actual event starts) in which Kaito apparently spends it talking to Kaede or Shuichi about space, just because he can. There’s also several of his hangouts in the Salmon Team bonus mode where Shuichi’s suggestion of what to do doesn’t really have anything to do with space, but Kaito finds a way to make it about space anyway. ADHD minds are hyper-associative and make connections between concepts very easily – and, naturally, they’re particularly liable to make connections to the thing that the mind is already spending the majority of its time thinking about. So it’s really not so surprising or remarkable at all that Kaito can find ways to make even seemingly-totally-unrelated topics about space somehow, not if he’s ADHD.

(…To be fair, a particular fixation on a certain topic to the point of repeatedly bringing it up when it’s not called for isn’t necessarily that uncommon among Danganronpa characters, what with their talents. But hey, that doesn’t have to make Kaito any less likely to be ADHD. Rather, it would actually make sense for Ultimate students to have a higher than average proportion of ADHDers among them, since an ADHD-fuelled level of intense interest in a thing is more likely to make someone become hugely talented at it out of accumulated knowledge and practice. I’ve been increasingly thinking that Kaede could perhaps be ADHD, too, for example. But that’s not for this post; we’re talking about Kaito here.)

The longevity of space

ADHDers will generally go through many different hyperfixations throughout their life, sometimes one at a time, sometimes somehow managing to juggle more than one. An individual hyperfixation tends to last anywhere between a few weeks to a few years depending on its intensity and the longevity of the topic, but it’s rare for it to be more than that. Usually, sooner or later, the overwhelming passion for the thing will wear itself out.

And admittedly, Kaito’s passion for space has been there since he was a kid and never faded – and never will, of course! – which is far more persistent than most hyperfixations tend to be. But then again, there’s so many different things related to space for him to get excited about! Hyperfixations fade either when something else comes along that’s more exciting because it’s new and fresh, or when you’ve squeezed every last possible drop of dopamine out of it such that it no longer holds quite the same thrill. But with a topic as vast as space, there’s always more to learn to keep the excitement fresh, especially now that Kaito’s an astronaut trainee and is really on the front line of new space knowledge and technologies and is actually going to get there himself one day!

Besides, it’s not like ADHDers’ hyperfixations are completely outside of their control. My own hyperfixation on V3 and Kaito would probably have faded ages ago if I hadn’t kept it going by constantly making more content about it such as this. And similarly, there’s no way Kaito would have wanted to let go of his passion for space, not if he had any say in it himself, so he’d have done whatever he could to keep it burning during the times when the spark maybe wasn’t quite there as much. I don’t think it’s at all unreasonable that Kaito could have remained hyperfixated on space for so unusually long and still be showing no signs of stopping. We all know how stubborn he is.

(House plants)

Kaito has probably had a few other, lesser hyperfixations alongside his lifelong passion for space. For example, I like to think that his fondness for house plants, according to his report card, is to such an extent that he was once hyperfixated on them. (This would have been for reasons that totally don’t bear a suspicious resemblance to other things he cares about.) I doubt he’s currently hyperfixating on them at the moment – at no point does he ever try to shift the conversation to being about house plants unprompted – but that wouldn’t stop him from still being generally fond of them and retaining all of the “useless” information he learned about them back when he was obsessed. One very rarely ever stops caring about a hyperfixation topic entirely; rather, the fixation just fades and the topic becomes no longer constantly on someone’s mind. I’m sure Kaito still could and would talk your ear off about house plants just as much as he would about space if you happened to get him started.

People

More importantly, though, I think that another of Kaito’s less obvious and intense hyperfixations – but still a very long-lasting one that’s active right now – could be, simply, people. Just, people in general: their flaws and complexities and differences, all the many ways in which they can communicate and work together, and the amazing potential they have to achieve great things if they do so. Kaito is so passionate about this stuff and has so many fully-formed opinions on things of this nature that make it seem like he’s spent a lot of his free time thinking about this, just because he can. Maybe he began to get interested in it after realising that communication and teamwork is important for an astronaut – but it also reads to me like Kaito is into this kind of stuff not because he needs to be for the sake of getting into space, but simply because he finds it genuinely fascinating and couldn’t stop thinking about it even if he had to. (Which would also help keep him interested in space, because it’s intrinsically linked to this other topic that Kaito finds fascinating!)

And within this, Kaito definitely hyperfixates in particular on his sidekicks. Once he’s made someone into his sidekick, which functionally means that he’s going to devote himself to supporting them through their issues and helping them reach their potential, he really devotes himself. It’s his hyperfixation on people in general, but concentrated on a specific person(s) that he can have a direct and tangible impact on, which means even more to him than just his feelings about how awesome and fascinating humanity is as a whole.

Kaito is really, really good at supporting his sidekicks, after all. He spends so much time, even when he’s not around them, thinking about what their problems are and the best ways he can help them. He was clearly eyeing up both Shuichi and Maki as potential sidekicks at least a day or two before actually acting on it and inviting them to training, as if he was trying to gauge exactly what their struggles were and how best to help before jumping right in. He approaches helping each of them in very different ways, making it clear that he’s specifically thought about who they are and the best tactics to help them individually instead of just carelessly using the same old script each time. On more than one occasion, he drops something on them one morning – the nickname “Maki Roll”, and the “bonus” training that becomes the katana scene – that he hadn’t mentioned at all the previous night, meaning that he’d been thinking further about how to keep helping them while on his own overnight.

So it seems to me like maybe it’s not just his selflessness, or his somewhat unhealthy co-dependency (more on that later, actually) that makes Kaito so good at this. I don’t think he could even stop thinking about helping his sidekicks if he tried. Figuring out how to help another human being grow and change and reach their full potential is so fascinating and engaging and rewarding to him that how could he ever not be compelled to do that as much as he possibly can?

The price of caring

This does, however, come with a downside. Because Kaito is fixating so strongly and uncontrollably on supporting his sidekicks, because doing that matters so much to him, it’s only going to hurt him more when he begins to feel like he’s failing at it. He can’t just brush something like that off as not really a big deal, because of course it’s a big deal. It’s everything to him, and it’s literally not possible for him to make himself feel like it isn’t.

It’s just as bad as if space suddenly twisted and became painful to think about somehow. Which… I guess that actually kind of happens too, when Kaito starts to realise that he’s never going to make it up there. And he can’t deal with that by trying to tell himself it was never that important, either, because space is always important to him. Even if he wanted to switch that part of his brain off or ignore it to help himself cope, he just couldn’t.

Caring so intensely about things feels amazing and makes a person wonderfully passionate, but it can also be a double-edged sword.

(Executive dysfunction?)

One big negative side to ADHD is that it tends to cause executive dysfunction, which, to massively oversimplify it, more or less means the profound inability to get yourself to do things that you know you’re supposed to be perfectly able to do. That interest-based nervous system does not do well with motivating us to do tasks that are objectively important but aren’t interesting or fun to actually carry out, resulting in a mental block that can appear to the outside observer like wilful laziness, even though it really, really isn’t.

This appears to be one part of ADHD that Kaito manages to avoid having to deal with. (He may superficially seem “lazy” during training, but that has nothing to do with his brain and everything to do with his body and the fact that he’s sick and doesn’t want anyone to know.) But I think that’s mostly because none of the reasons that ADHD causes executive dysfunction actually apply in the killing game.

One of the few things other than interest that motivates an ADHD brain is urgency – suddenly they can do that boring essay they’ve been putting off when the deadline is tonight, showing remarkable speed and focus in a fit of nervous anxiety over the potential consequences of turning it in late. And there’s plenty of literal do-or-die urgency to motivate Kaito during the killing game, so there’s no way he’d ever not be motivated to do what he feels he needs to do to help everyone there. Plus, the things he’s trying to do involve helping people, something he inherently finds interesting, so he’d be motivated for those reasons anyway even if it wasn’t quite so life-threateningly vital that he does so.

(Kaito is a bit flakier and liable to miss important details during the investigations and trials, mind you. This might be because, while the urgency of “if we don’t solve the case we die” is looming over him, the actual details of the case aren’t something that instinctively feels urgent or that he inherently finds interesting, so it’s harder for him to pay proper attention and take it all in even when he’s trying to. Kaito has plenty of intelligence in a lot of ways, but his brain is evidently not wired for investigations and deductions like Shuichi’s is – he’s perfectly capable of following Shuichi’s logic and understanding it, but not of figuring any of that stuff out himself in the first place. This could partly be down to Kaito having ADHD and just not being interested enough in these particular kinds of mental exercises to be able to get his brain to focus on them as much as he’d need to in order to solve them.)

I also don’t think executive dysfunction would have got in Kaito’s way much during his regular life before the killing game. (You know, if he’d actually had one, but let’s pretend for now that he did.) Motivation issues can be helped a lot by an externally-imposed structure telling you what you need to do and when, which is why a lot of ADHD people don’t even notice any problems while they’re in a school system and only fall apart once they’re adults and are suddenly expected to structure their own life. Kaito’s astronaut training would definitely give him plenty of structure to work from so that he always knew what he needed to do and never had this issue. It’s also really challenging, which is another thing that helps keep ADHD people interested and motivated. And while the actual end goal of getting to space is far-off enough that it wouldn’t be able to work as a direct motivator to an ADHD brain (we are bad at things with delayed gratification), everything Kaito’s learning would still be related to space and communication and teamwork, so he’d be interested in learning all of it simply for its own sake.

Emotional hyperarousal

Another big defining feature of ADHD that isn’t nearly as well-known as it ought to be is that it amplifies emotions to a far greater intensity than those of neurotypical people. ADHDers’ feelings and reactions are naturally bigger and louder and just more than most people’s – which sounds a lot like Kaito, doesn’t it? He’s always larger than life, energetic and passionate about everything, not just his specific hyperfixations. Look at how excited he gets about just seeing snow! And he has so much enthusiasm for so much else, too – as he puts it: “there’s nothing unnecessary in this world!” When Kaito feels things, he feels them full-throttle, with no half-measures, which is just how Kaito would always want things to be!

…But, whether he likes it or not, that also applies to the painful feelings just as much as the good ones.

Emotional dysregulation

Kaito can often be very reactionary and get unnecessarily riled up over minor things that don’t really warrant such a dramatic response. If you think about it, this isn’t really something he’d want to do, because he’s always trying to stay positive and keep people on his side. So apparently it’s something he simply can’t help, as if his brain is just wired to make him more liable to do that.

If even minor slights can cause an overreaction like that from an ADHD brain, then imagine how much worse it is when the stimulus is something genuinely worth being upset over. That already-painful emotion gets amplified to even greater levels, to the point that it can be almost unbearable. People with ADHD can often have a more difficult time dealing with things, not necessarily because they’re emotionally weaker, but because they simply feel things harder than most other people do.

Kaito goes through a lot of emotional pain throughout the story – and he’s really pretty bad at dealing with it all. He basically has only two not-very-healthy methods for doing so. One is to try to ignore it entirely by focusing on something more positive, which on its own could be put down to his desire to come across as an invincible hero who can inspire people. So this particular unhealthy tactic doesn’t necessarily mean that he wouldn’t be able to properly deal with these emotions if he actually stopped being an idiot and tried to.

However, Kaito’s second unhealthy coping mechanism is to turn the pain into anger – sometimes to the point of lashing out in ways he doesn’t mean to. Punching Shuichi at the end of the first trial is very much caused by Kaito being unable to contain his pain over Kaede’s death rather than any controlled attempt to push Shuichi forward, since he regrets it and apologises for it the next morning. And then the agonising truth that Gonta killed someone is even harder for Kaito to bear, leading to him lashing out at Shuichi again in what was very much desperate pain-fuelled anger with no rational basis for it. Unlike with simply hiding his pain, lashing out like this is not something Kaito would ever want to do; it’s not exactly very heroic of him, after all. So this suggests that there’s more to Kaito’s bad coping mechanisms than just him trying to appear strong and not worry people – that sometimes the pain gets so unbearably intense that ignoring it isn’t possible and he just can’t deal with it and loses control of himself.

Uncontrollable bouts of rage can be a common problem that comes with ADHD because of the amplified emotions and difficulty properly regulating them – and it’s definitely a problem Kaito suffers from, too. That part of Kaito that lets him get so wonderfully passionate in helping everyone around him might well be exactly the same part of him that simply cannot handle it when he realises Gonta murdered someone and leads to him lashing out at his best friend.

Moping (…not a technical term)

…Okay, I just said Kaito has only two unhealthy coping mechanisms for painful emotions, but maybe there’s also kind of a third: unconstructively moping about it. This doesn’t sound like Kaito at all – he frequently gives others advice about not doing exactly that – but he can actually be seen falling into doing so a couple of times if you look closely.

In chapter 2, when Ryoma’s behaviour bothers him for all the wrong reasons and he has no intent of actually doing something about it, Kaito really should be just trying not to think about it at all and focusing on something more constructive like helping Shuichi. However, the places he hangs out in for his chapter 2 FTEs and his invitation dialogues indicate that he spends a whole three FTE slots just brooding unhelpfully about the state Ryoma’s in. This is definitely not something he wants to be doing, since he hastily changes the subject if Shuichi hangs out with him.

And in case 4’s investigation, after Shuichi’s cell phone experiment makes Kaito feel useless and unneeded (he thought Shuichi needed his help! – but, no, turns out he actually really didn’t), the pain of that feeling noticeably lingers with him for most of the rest of the investigation. He’s in enough of a bad mood about it afterwards that Maki notices it through his less-expressive virtual avatar, and he doesn’t even come with her to call Shuichi back from the rooftop and just logs out on his own in a sulk. Then he also ends up explicitly unaware in the trial of some of the information Monotaro shared with the whole group once they’d logged out, meaning he was apparently still too wrapped up in feeling useless to be paying proper attention.

(And these are the two examples of Kaito doing this that are noticeable thanks to subtle clues in his behaviour – but since Kaito would obviously never draw attention to it, maybe he actually does this a lot more than those two times and we just can’t normally see it.)

See, another thing about emotional dysregulation – plus the difficulty in controlling the focus of your attention that comes with ADHD – is that it can be hard to stop yourself from thinking endlessly about painful things, even when you very much don’t want to be thinking about them. I once saw a tumblr post describing ADHD as Chronic Cannot Leave It Alone Disorder, and I can confirm that, yes, this is very frustratingly accurate, for the bad things as well as the good. It’s possible that Kaito’s advice about not moping when you could be doing something to make a difference might have originated for himself, to try and mitigate his brain’s tendency to do this. But while I imagine this helped quite a bit in letting him control his thoughts and stay focused on the positives, it appears that, despite his best efforts, it still doesn’t always work.

Impulsiveness

The Primarily-Hyperactive subtype of ADHD (aka the one that’s definitely the subtype Kaito has, for obvious reasons) is sometimes called Hyperactive-Impulsive type, because impulsiveness tends to be a big part of it, too. I think this is kind of a combination of emotional hyperarousal and inability to control attention – the impulse to Do A Thing gets amplified to the point that it floods the entire brain, and it becomes nigh-impossible to ignore it and consider the potential negative consequences before acting on it. It’s like that Chronic Cannot Leave It Alone Disorder gets concentrated into a single instant of frequently-terrible decision-making.

It’s no secret that Kaito is impulsively reckless – and if you think about it, it’s to an extent that’s honestly kind of pathological. Cheating his way into the astronaut exam early, for example, could very well have permanently ruined his chances of ever being allowed in and making it to space. He should never have considered that a risk worth taking. So apparently he just wasn’t properly considering the risk at all – not even for the most important decision of his life.

A lot of the time, these kinds of bad decisions can be fuelled by those amplified painful emotions that get turned into anger like I talked about before. The stress of the killing game causes Kaito to very nearly get himself killed on two occasions early in chapter 1, almost lashing out in a way that would have broken school regulations. Kaito is perfectly aware of the consequences for doing that – but in the heat of the moment, it just doesn’t matter to him. His overwhelming desire to express his pain-fuelled rage simply blocks out everything else from his mind. A similar thing happens in chapter 5 when Kaito’s attempt to punch Kokichi after the supposed mastermind reveal only results in him getting knocked out and captured by the Exisals that were very obviously there and under Kokichi’s control. It’s summed up pretty well by the fact that Kokichi outright tells Kaito that punching him won’t fix any of the things he’s angry about, and Kaito’s response is, “Even if that is the case… I can’t get over it if I don’t punch you!” To Kaito, in these moments, it’s never about the consequences; it’s about needing to let out his too-strong emotions right now and to hell with everything else, even if that “everything else” literally might include his life.

Then there’s everything that happens with Kaito at the casino. The consequences for him here aren’t exactly dire, since all he loses out on is the chance to buy a prize, but still – that uncontrollable fixation on the anticipated thrill of winning and the inability to consider the really-very-high possibility that he’ll lose is exactly the type of reckless thrill-seeking that people with this type of ADHD often have.

In fact, the bonus scene at the casino is literally titled “Kaito’s Gambling Problem” – and as you might imagine, impulsive-type ADHDers are at a higher risk of developing harmful addictions to things such as gambling. While this isn’t an actual gambling problem here because no real money is involved and it does seem that he never gets tempted by the casino again after the second time, the scene’s title apparently wants us to consider that Kaito has the potential to develop a legitimate gambling problem should he ever get old enough to legally gamble in the real world. Which is a weirdly specific thing for the writers to make a point of when it has no bearing on the plot… so it makes me wonder if they could have actually been trying to tell us something here.

This kind of impulsiveness can also cause people to blurt out their thoughts without thinking about the consequences, potentially resulting in upsetting someone or embarrassing themselves. At first glance, considering that he has a lot of thoughts he’s determined to hide from the surface, Kaito doesn’t seem to have too much of a problem with this kind of impulsiveness. If he did, you’d think he’d find himself muttering stuff like “I feel like crap”, or “I hate this place” all the time and then having to hastily paper over it and insist that no that’s definitely not how he’s really feeling at all. So apparently, he’s fairly good at thinking before he speaks when it matters to him?

Except, when he’s in the Virtual World, Kaito makes multiple unthinking comments to the effect of “I like this avatar body”, which he has to awkwardly brush off when Shuichi questions him, since it rather hints that something’s up with his real body. He’s suddenly really bad at this, even though he was pretty good at it the rest of the time.

So maybe what’s going on is this: in an effort to stay positive at all times because he’s Kaito, Kaito trained himself to have a constant, unshakeable mental filter that prevents himself from impulsively blurting out how he’s feeling if it’s something negative. However, he can’t stop himself from still randomly blurting out whatever positive things are on his mind. This usually isn’t a problem, but it can sometimes include things – it feels so great to not be dying for once! – that he really doesn’t want to be voicing either, if he only gave it a moment more thought.

Rejection sensitive dysphoria

Often shortened to RSD, rejection sensitive dysphoria is a specific and especially nasty kind of emotional hyperarousal / dysregulation that almost all ADHDers suffer from. (At least, I feel like it should probably be classified as a subtype of that, though I’m not sure if that’s the official take, so don’t quote me on this.) The ADHD researcher who coined the term defines it as: “extreme emotional pain triggered by the perception – not necessarily the reality – that a person has been rejected or criticised by important people in their life. It may also be triggered by a sense of falling short and failing to meet their own high standards or others’ expectations.” That second sentence is important and frequently overlooked, because it indicates that, despite the name, this isn’t only about perceived rejection by others; it can also be about an entirely personal sense of failure.

I first read about this concept while I happened to be hyperfixating on Kaito’s mindset specifically in early chapter 5, aka that time he avoids Shuichi out of shame over feeling like he failed him in the previous trial, due to his own unreasonably high standards for being a “hero”. (If you didn’t realise that this is what’s going on with Kaito in early chapter 5, go read this other post of mine and get caught up, because you’re going to need to be for the rest of this section.) And, naturally, though I was supposed to be reading that article about RSD to help me figure out if I had ADHD, my brain made some connections. That was the moment I began to have this headcanon; everything else in this post blossomed from that as I thought about it more and realised a lot of other things about Kaito also fit this incredibly well.

The null hypothesis

So, let’s consider early chapter 5. In fact, let’s assume for a moment that Kaito doesn’t have ADHD and his emotions function like a regular person’s. He would still, of course, feel like he’s utterly failed Shuichi by showing himself to be weaker than him and doing the opposite of supporting him during trial 4. That part’s not specifically based in anything ADHD and is just a product of Kaito’s psychological issues about heroes, which I’ve already talked about plenty in that post I just linked. (I don’t want anyone to think that my ADHD headcanon is getting in the way of or diminishing any of that; this is just another layer on top of it.)

Kaito really wants to make things right and apologise for his mistakes in the trial (and for his really-not-actually-mistakes too, for that matter). He really wants to fix the rift between him and Shuichi and not leave the two of them painfully torn apart like this. He knows the responsibility to do so is on him and not Shuichi. But… he doesn’t do it. Why not?

The only possible reason would be that he’s just being a coward and running away from the guilt and shame he’s feeling rather than facing up to it. Except… Kaito’s not a coward. He may arguably seem like one in some ways given how he refuses to acknowledge his weaknesses to his sidekicks – but that’s not to protect himself and his own emotions; it’s because he’s idiotically convinced that it’s better for them that way. Here, now that he believes he’s already failed Shuichi as badly as he ever could, he should feel like he has nothing more to lose on that front (and Shuichi never even needed him anyway, right?), so there should be no harm in owning up to it and at least apologising for what he’s done wrong.

Granted, Kaito is busy trying to make up for his failure through his totally-great escape plan – but that’s still no reason why he can’t also apologise first and then keep trying to make up for things with the plan anyway. And it’s not at all like it was in the trial itself, when he was too wound-up in the heat of the moment to be thinking clearly. He’s had plenty of time to process what happened and regain control of himself and become consciously aware of what he knows is the right thing to do here.

The guilt and shame Kaito would be feeling from his belief that he’s failed Shuichi would still hurt pretty bad, sure – but I don’t think, if it really is a proportionate emotional response to what he feels like he’s done, that it’d be something he couldn’t face up to. He’s incredibly resilient and knows that sometimes you’ve just gotta face painful things head-on, and he should be more than willing to do so for the sake of making things at least slightly better between him and Shuichi.

So, I argue this: Kaito avoiding Shuichi the way he does in early chapter 5 doesn’t quite make sense unless he has ADHD. (Or perhaps some other neurological disorder that would have a similar effect on his emotions, but I’m not knowledgeable enough to be sure what other possibilities could fit.)

Too much pain

I can confirm from experience: RSD freaking sucks. Any feeling of “I should be able to do this, but I messed it up”, or any seemingly innocuous comment from someone you care about where they either point out a mistake you made or that could possibly be interpreted to mean they don’t really care about you that much – these things can hurt like hell, so much more than they have any right to. It’s as if that insignificant twinge of disappointment that most people would feel just gets multiplied by like a thousand until it practically feels like you’ve been stabbed in the chest. And I should note: the rejection version tends to be triggered by people important to you, but I find it’s especially bad if it’s someone I not only care about but also look up to. You know, like Kaito very definitely does to Shuichi.

Case 4 has plenty of things that would trigger RSD for Kaito before even getting into the worst parts of the trial. That cell phone incident in the investigation I mentioned earlier, where Kaito thought Shuichi needed his help for a second and then ended up feeling like he really never did at all? And all the times Shuichi shoots down one of Kaito’s arguments in the trial and tells him he’s wrong (which happens seven times, by the way)? Every single one of those seemingly-minor moments would have hurt Kaito not just a little, but one hell of a lot. It’s honestly really impressive and a testament to Kaito’s resilience that he managed to keep himself together and show barely any signs of how he was feeling for as long as he did.

It’s also very relevant that RSD is known to potentially trigger an externalised response of instantaneous rage, exactly like the outbursts of anger I mentioned in the previous section. I’ve already talked plenty elsewhere about how a lot of the pain that’s causing Kaito to lash out in trial 4 isn’t just over Gonta’s guilt but is also over how he’s being made to feel like a horribly inferior failure compared to Shuichi – and, yep, that’s still a perfect match to Kaito having ADHD.

By the end of the trial, Kaito’s issues and irrationalities have rendered him convinced that he’s utterly failed to be the hero he’s supposed to be, and that Shuichi obviously doesn’t need him or care about him any more (if he ever even did in the first place). That’s giving Kaito plenty of genuine conscious reason to be hurting pretty damn hard to begin with, before his ADHD brain-wiring even sinks its claws into it. Now try to imagine that pain getting disproportionately multiplied by like a thousand – fucking ouch, and then some. Nobody, not even someone as brave and resilient as Kaito, should ever be expected to be able to face up to that, to actively make it even worse by talking about it and bringing those feelings to the forefront, especially not when doing so would just be showing even more weakness to the person it hurts so much to show weakness to. I don’t believe it’d be fair to call anyone a coward for that.

Kaito’s not a coward; he avoids Shuichi in early chapter 5 because he is genuinely in too much pain to bear. The only way he can deal with it at all (now that he’s not in the heat of trial 4 and is very determined to at least not make things even worse by lashing out in anger again) is by simply trying to pretend the problem doesn’t exist. If he manages to prove himself as a hero, maybe it’ll stop hurting quite as much and he’ll be able to face up to it, but until then, avoiding the pain is all he can do.

(Obligatory Harmonious Heart mention)

Since I relish the opportunity to bring this scene up whenever I can, I might as well add that Kaito’s Harmonious Heart event is another instance in which he’d be feeling some pretty rough RSD – at least, in every outcome except the best one in which Shuichi reassures him that they’re friends and it’s okay to open up to your friend. It’d be especially bad in the worst outcome where Kaito realises Shuichi has seen his “weakness” and feels like he’s failed him. Probably not quite as bad as in canon, but still, ouch.

In fact, an interesting thing about that worst outcome is that Kaito specifically says he feels “so embarrassed”, which, when you think about it, doesn’t really sound like the kind of thing anyone would expect Kaito to ever describe himself as feeling, even at a time like this. However, I know from my own experience that “embarrassment” is in fact something that it’s easy to mistake RSD for when you don’t know what it is – just an embarrassment that’s somehow agonisingly painful, because that’s totally how embarrassment usually works for most people, right. So, A, this fits perfectly yet again, and B, since you’d usually not think to have Kaito ever use that word… it makes me wonder if the writer for this scene knew.

Coping methods (and why Kaito doesn’t have them)

Of course, it’s not like there aren’t methods to try to combat and mitigate the incredible pain that RSD can bring. One that I’ve found works really well (thanks to Kaito himself!) is exercising. It really helps to burn off that excessive emotional energy – and not necessarily just RSD, but any of the disproportionately painful emotions ADHD brings – by translating it into physical energy. “Let your sweat wash away all your sadness, fear, worry and hardships; just start moving your body and your pain will become memories before you know it,” actually sums up how this feels pretty well! It’s quite possible that this advice – heck, maybe his entire exercise-to-help-the-mind thing in general – is something else that Kaito first came up with for himself, after he found that it helped him calm down and feel better whenever he’d get too upset about something.

…So it’s really rather cruel that Kaito’s worsening illness also happens to lock him out of one of his only genuinely-healthy coping mechanisms for what he’s going through emotionally in chapters 4 and 5, isn’t it.

Another thing that’s really helped me in dealing with my own RSD is simply understanding it. When you know that it’s a disproportionate emotional response, you can remind yourself that things aren’t truly as bad as the pain is making them feel like they are, which makes it easier to take steps to stop it hurting, such as talking to the friend who unintentionally triggered it and having them reassure you that of course they care about you. Without that understanding of it, it’s all too easy to think, “if it hurts this much, I must deserve to be hurting this much,” which, yeah, that’s a bad path to go down.

One pretty important part of my headcanon that Kaito has ADHD, then, is that he definitely has no idea he has it. If he’d been diagnosed with it at some point in his life, he’d understand these problems of his better. Even if the doctors never told him all these things I’ve been mentioning here about how ADHD actually works (which is way too disappointingly common, so I gather), Kaito would have researched this stuff himself at some point, in order to better understand himself and know his limits so that he can work around them to be the best person he can be. He wouldn’t want to let anything get in the way of him helping others as much as he can and achieving his dream of going to space, not even the idiosyncrasies of his own brain. And, heck, he’d probably find it interesting if only he had a reason to look into it in the first place! Many ADHDers hyperfixate on ADHD, and Kaito definitely seems like someone who would have if he’d known.

So, if Kaito was aware of his ADHD, he’d be able to recognise what he’s going through in early chapter 5 as RSD and handle it better. He’d know that, no matter how much it hurts, things aren’t actually quite as bad as it feels like, and that apologising to Shuichi sooner rather than later is almost certainly the best way forward even if the prospect of doing so seems terrifying as all hell. For that matter, if Kaito knew about his ADHD and what it really involved, he’d almost certainly have trained himself to be able to deal with a lot of his more troublesome symptoms better than he ever does in canon.

Friendship difficulties

Because of their differently-wired brains, ADHDers can often struggle to connect with the rest of the world that doesn’t think the same way as them. And here’s a fun subtle thing about Kaito that ought to get talked about more: he’s not actually very skilled or experienced at making friends. Having sidekicks that he can inspire and support, and being a general encouraging influence on a wider group of people to keep them working together – sure, that stuff comes naturally to him. But regular, everyday friendship? Not so much.

This isn’t that easy to spot, because most of the time we see Kaito, he’s deliberately focusing on motivating people, which he’s great at. But there are a few instances here and there where Kaito interacts with people in a not-specifically-motivational way: his attempts to befriend Kaede (who doesn’t need his support), his earlier FTEs with Shuichi (which should be happening before training starts), and the conversation with Shuichi and Maki in chapter 4’s second training scene (before Maki begins talking about her past).

In all of these, Kaito turns out to actually be a huge awkward goof who doesn’t seem to have the first clue how to do regular interpersonal interactions. And basically everything about him being this way can potentially be explained by ADHD.

Too many thoughts

It’s never quiet and organised in an ADHD brain; whenever we’re not hyperfocusing on one specific thing, our minds always have like five different thoughts rattling around in them at once. So, consider the conversation with Shuichi and Maki, which Kaito was attempting to treat like a Regular Conversation (rather than the chance to help Maki open up that it definitely actually was in his head). Perhaps, in his efforts to do small talk, not one but several different possible small talk questions popped into his head at once and clamoured for his attention, such that a couple of them – “what blood type are you?” and “what [something] do you like?” – got accidentally merged together when he opened his mouth to speak. That plus his impulsive lack-of-filter meant that out came “What blood type do you like?” and Kaito sounding like a doofus.

(When Maki points out that this is a strange question, Kaito awkwardly laughs it off. It almost seems like he’s used to accidentally saying things people consider weird during his attempts at normal conversation and has learned to try and act like it’s nothing so he doesn’t push anyone away.)

This disorganisation in ADHD minds also tends to make them get too caught up on unnecessary details they find interesting and wander off down random mental tangents rather than whatever they’re supposed to be talking or thinking about. I once saw a tumblr post that said ADHDers are likely to tell “stories that start sooner than they need to and end somewhere other than the point” – and this happens to be a literally perfect description of the story Kaito tells Shuichi in his second and third FTEs. He was supposed to be telling Shuichi how he became interested in space. He began by talking about finding a treasure map and conquering the seas, and he finished with how he was busy conquering the land when his summer vacation ended. At no point did he mention space; he’d got so wrapped up in the story itself that he’d completely forgotten that was meant to be the point.

Kaito also has a bit of a tendency to make strange statements that appear to make perfect sense to him even though they kind of don’t to anybody else. He wants to learn to play the piano for when he goes to space? Well, of course; he might meet an alien! You can’t ever know how malicious other people’s secrets are? Sure, but that’s why you just gotta believe in… yourself! These really do make perfect sense in Kaito’s head (the first is about communication; the second is about people-reading skills). But it seems, perhaps, that his overly-active mind made connections too fast and jumped several tracks at once, to the point that he didn’t realise he was skipping a few steps of his explanation and that it wouldn’t make so much sense to the people listening. Which is also a thing that ADHD people are liable to do.

Too loud and excitable

A less immediately obvious thing that’s strange about Kaito’s behaviour in the chapter 4 training chat is that, when Shuichi essentially just straight-up asks Maki to start talking about her issues, Kaito admonishes him for being too direct and claims he can’t just do that. This seems odd coming from Kaito, who’s usually nothing but direct in his approaches to encouraging people, and who definitely also intended to prompt Maki into talking about her issues here.

But, apparently because he’s trying to present this as a Regular Normal Friend Conversation, Kaito didn’t think he was meant to be so direct in this context. Which suggests he’s learned through experience that his usual kind of directness that works great for encouragement apparently just kind of puts people off when it’s used in a regular conversation. So instead, he was trying to work his way towards hopefully maybe getting Maki to open up through awkward small talk that he must know he’s terrible at – no wonder he was miffed when Shuichi casually went and committed the exact social “faux-pas” he’d been trying to avoid, with complete confidence that it’d actually be fine, and it turned out it was. (Whoops, there goes Shuichi effortlessly being better than him at everything Kaito finds difficult, like always.)

Nonetheless, Kaito probably has good reason to be worried about coming across as too direct (outside of sidekick contexts, where that’s just the best way to get through to someone and help). Because, when he’s not actively trying to avoid it, he does have a tendency to get a bit carried away with things and put people off as a result. Remember the time he asked Kaede for a hug? There’s absolutely no reason to assume this was romantic or sexual in nature, because it already makes more than enough sense to think that Kaito was just so excited at meeting someone so similar to him and thought she was Super Cool and just really wanted to be her friend!!! So he impulsively expressed that sentiment in a rather-too-forward way that he was too caught up in his excitement to realise was going to come across as rather inappropriate.

Not that being too overly excitable and direct about things necessarily has to lead to behaviour that’s outright inappropriate in order to cause problems. (Though please never forget that Kaito asked for the hug and respected Kaede’s boundaries when she said no.) Even if he’s not doing anything wrong, Kaito being his usual larger-than-life self all the time might just come across as a bit Much and be kind of weird and off-putting for a lot of people. It’s that emotional hyperarousal again, which I mostly talked about the negative side of in the earlier section – but the positive side of it, amplifying the good emotions to make someone more enthusiastic and passionate, can still (completely undeservedly) be a negative thing in a social context with others who just aren’t wired the same way.

In Kaito’s second FTE, wrapped up among his ridiculous overblown childish fiction, he appears to potentially be talking about an actual playmate he had at the time who joined in his game of pretending to be a sea captain. Then they had a fight and Kaito never saw him again – and he presents that like it was just part of his game, too, but this can likely be taken to mean that they had a falling out that never got resolved and stopped being friends. If so, I can’t help but assume that this was probably because tiny Kaito was a little bit too boisterous and excessive in his playing – while still not necessarily doing anything wrong – that it overwhelmed this other kid to the point that he didn’t really want to join in any more.

There’s also one bit of FTE invitation dialogue where Kaito claims he’s about to teach Kaede how to have peace of mind… and then he tells stories that make her question his definition of that. Which makes a lot of sense considering that ADHD minds, particularly hyperactive-type ones, are never relaxed for even a moment. Kaito doesn’t know how not to be energetic and over-the-top even when the people he’s with just want to wind down and relax, which also wouldn’t really do him any favours in terms of making friends.

But none of that is Kaito’s fault; he’s not trying to be selfish or drive these people away. It’s simply the way his mind is, always going full-throttle when most other people’s usually aren’t. He just gets so excited about so many things and has a hard time toning that down. Besides, why would Kaito even want to tone it down and be boringly down-to-earth when his mind could be up in space instead!? That’s much better! …except that most other people don’t see it that way.

Too much infodumping

In the training chat, after embarrassing himself with a bungled small talk question and being shown up by Shuichi making it look like it’s actually somehow not a problem to be too direct after all, Kaito attempts to bring things back around to small talk with the, uh, “safe” option of asking Maki what her favourite spaceship is. Which isn’t really small talk at all, of course – but then, actual small talk is hard for ADHD people, because it’s not interesting enough to care about paying proper attention to. They’d much rather be acting on that constant desire to talk about something they’re interested in, such as one of their hyperfixations, which is not always the best way to connect with others who don’t happen to be interested in the same thing.

(Fortunately, since another of his hyperfixations is Maki and her issues, Kaito is perfectly happy to listen once she starts talking about her past, and the conversation shifts back to a comfortable hero-and-sidekick situation again rather than an awkward and confusing how-do-I-friends???)

There’s another of those FTE invitation dialogues in chapter 1 where Kaito tells Kaede he’s a good listener… and then apparently Kaede spends the entire time listening to him instead. Except, obviously Kaito really is a good listener when it’s in his hero-and-sidekick context and he’s helping someone with their problems, because he’s invested in supporting them and so it’d be easy for him to pay attention. But perhaps, when it’s in a regular friendship context and the person he’s talking to doesn’t need his help (like Kaede doesn’t), Kaito’s not quite so good at listening because he’s not necessarily as interested in what they have to say. So he might be liable to just impulsively act on the desire to talk about the things he wants to (such as SPACE; there is always time for space) and then get so focused on it that he overlooks the other person’s feelings and genuinely doesn’t realise he’s coming across as kind of brash and self-absorbed.

Kaito’s second and third FTEs with Shuichi are an even better illustration of this. Upon Shuichi choosing to hang out with him for a second time, Kaito apparently realises Shuichi is interested enough in him to possibly want to be his friend. So he responds to this by… launching into a huge ridiculous story about his (completely make-believe) heroic adventures as a kid. This kind of one-sided conversation and bizarre topic choice is not, in fact, a great way to make friends with someone, but Kaito doesn’t seem to realise this. He finds his story so cool and exciting that he impulsively assumes Shuichi would too and jumps into it without actually confirming whether Shuichi wants to hear it or not. And, honestly, it seems like Shuichi doesn’t, at least not particularly, and is only listening out of politeness and an inability to get a word in edgeways. His less-than-enthusiastic response to Kaito’s story suggests that these FTEs are canonically meant to happen before training begins and Shuichi comes to properly consider Kaito a friend – and therefore that Kaito’s not really doing the best job here of making Shuichi begin to consider him a friend.

Still himself despite it all!

All of these potentially-ADHD-fuelled idiosyncrasies of Kaito’s make it a lot harder for him to make friends in the normal way – and he seems to be somewhat aware of this. Some of the things from the chapter 4 chat hint that he’s slightly insecure and afraid he’s going to put Shuichi and Maki off by being so dorkily himself. There’s also a little more of this in the Salmon Team bonus mode, in which friendship is the entire point, and yet a few lines when he’s inviting Shuichi to hang out hint that Kaito isn’t completely convinced that Shuichi would want to hang out with him as a friend rather than as a sidekick who needs his advice and support. If he was more used to having friends, he probably wouldn’t still be so insecure about this – so this honestly kind of suggests that Shuichi and Maki could be the first real friends Kaito’s ever managed to make.

Because of these kinds of issues in connecting with people, a lot of ADHD kids grow up unconsciously learning to suppress their true selves, hiding their boundless enthusiasm and unusual interests to seem more “normal” so that they can fit in. I know this because I was one such kid, and I’m still struggling to unlearn this as an adult. So I have huge admiration for Kaito having managed to not do this, refusing to let anything stop him from being himself at all times. His convictions about staying true to himself are even more impressive when you realise that he would have felt so pressured to break them and pretend to be someone he’s not in order to more easily make friends.

As strong-willed as Kaito is, I doubt he’d have been able to do this as a kid without help. His parents and grandparents must have been really, really good in validating his passion and energy and never making him feel ashamed for being the way he is, assuring him that if other kids can’t see how great he is then that’s their problem and not because he’s doing anything wrong. He wants to go to space more than anything else in the world? Awesome; he should chase that dream with everything he has and not care how ridiculous and childish and impossible everyone else seems to think it is! Not all parents would do that.

After all, there are a lot of occasions in which Kaito does just brazenly present his larger-than-life self to someone in a clumsily overbearing attempt to make friends, without showing even the subtlest sign of being worried it might put them off. For that matter, Kaito is generally very willing to just throw himself into things he’s unfamiliar with and possibly end up failing spectacularly and making a fool of himself – something that’s likely to be pretty painful for him, given how RSD is. While some of this is probably down to his impulsiveness and not even considering that he might fail, I’m sure sometimes he’s got to be aware of it, and if so, that’s some impressive resilience and determination. People with ADHD can become unconsciously inclined to never try at anything out of a fear of that painful failure, but of course Kaito would refuse to let that happen to him – which is really quite admirable.

Interestingly, all of the times Kaito is subtly insecure about his social skills – the chapter 4 scene, the Salmon Team bits, and maybe that time with the former friend in his FTE if you assume that him wrapping it up in a fiction means he’s still uncomfortable about what happened – involve someone he’s already friends with.  After all, it’s probably easier for him to fearlessly dive in with someone new, because it’s less of a blow if he messes up in that context – not everyone’s going to click with him and that’s just how things go. But once Kaito’s already built a strong connection with someone, he becomes more afraid of messing up, because being rejected by someone important to him would be agonising. You might think that he ought to feel more comfortable around people he’s already friends with because he should trust them and know they’re not going anywhere no matter how much of a dork he is – but when RSD is a factor, it makes perfect sense for it to be the opposite.

Sidekicks can be friends, too!

Perhaps part of why Kaito is able to remain so confident in himself most of the time is because he nonetheless hasn’t grown up alone and lacking meaningful connections to other people. Despite his difficulty in making regular friends, he’s compensated for this by having sidekicks, which are a very different matter that his eccentricities conversely make him very good with. Being enthusiastic and energetic and over-the-top like Kaito can never not be is helpful when he’s being an inspiring hero, not weird or off-putting at all!

Still, while Kaito has a far easier time forging that initial connection with someone through the sidekick approach rather than the friend approach, that doesn’t make him worse at actually being someone’s friend (and not just their “hero”) once he’s got his foot in the door. If Kaito had told the story from his FTEs to Shuichi after they’d started training and properly bonded, Shuichi’s reaction would have been completely different: still probably exasperated, but in an affectionate kind of way, because he knows that’s just part of what makes Kaito who he is, and it’s actually pretty fun to be around. He has a lot of this sort of response to Kaito once they’re friends, and it’s adorable. It’s the same in the chapter 4 training chat – neither Maki nor Shuichi are at all put off by Kaito’s awkwardness, partly because they’re not exactly great at social skills themselves, but also because they know how much Kaito cares about them, and no amount of arbitrary social missteps could ever change that.

When someone becomes Kaito’s sidekick, meaning they’ve accepted his support and understand how much he wants to help them, they can see everything else about him that they might have found weird before in a new light. They learn that his eccentric behaviour isn’t him being deliberately rude or self-absorbed at all. It’s just genuinely how he is, and it’s part of how he can support them so well like he does, but that’s not all it’s good for. They come to appreciate Kaito not just for his incredible supportiveness, but for everything else about him, too. He’s not just their hero, but also their friend.

However… Kaito apparently can’t see that. Since he’s never been that good at forming regular friendships with people who don’t explicitly need him, he’s all too liable to assume that the people who do need him are only sticking around because of that, and no other reason. That co-dependency of Kaito’s I mentioned earlier, aka his rather unhealthy need to be needed? While the stressful context of the killing game definitely made it way worse throughout the story, it seems it was already slightly a thing in the first place – and if so, Kaito having ADHD could very well be the root cause.

Kaito is Good

Being realistic about how sadly uncommon well-represented neurodivergency is in fiction (and how misunderstood ADHD tends to be), I don’t know if I should try to assert that Kaito being ADHD was definitely the writers’ intent. However, almost every major facet of his character and personality fits with it so damn well that I want to think it’s at least possible that someone on the writing team could have had it in mind. Especially with the couple of bits I mentioned that seem like they could have been deliberately included by someone who Knows.

Still, even if it wasn’t intended, it’s amazing how good of a fit this is. Maybe it’s just that, in creating a character as intensely passionate as Kaito, the writers naturally wrote into him all the downsides of being that way as well, without even realising they were near-perfectly modelling the highs and lows of ADHD. After all, the human mind’s ability to simulate other human minds even when they’re not real is freaking magical. Kaito is such an incredibly well-written character with so much thought put into him whether or not he was meant to be as extremely ADHD-coded as he is.

I’ve always believed that Kaito is a fantastic example of how the best way to write realistic and interesting flaws into a character is to have them organically draw from traits that, in other situations, can be that character’s greatest strengths. And in my opinion, this is also kind of true about ADHD. When I figured out I had it and what it really meant, it was hugely validating for me, because I learned that almost everything I’d been struggling with was basically just the logically-inevitable downside of some of the things I’d always liked about myself, such as my ability to get so ridiculously analytical about stories I love like this. I wouldn’t trade those parts of myself away for anything – and I can’t imagine Kaito would, either.

I’ve seen a few posts and articles focusing on the bright side of having ADHD by listing some of the positive traits ADHDers often have because of it, and, delightfully, so many of them – fun to be around! compassionate! persistent! to name just a few – are things that Kaito has in spades. So, well, if ADHD can look so much like Kaito… then surely it can’t be all bad.

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(P.S.: High-five to anyone who headcanons Kaito as autistic! There’s a lot of overlap between that and ADHD. Many of the symptoms I’ve talked about here can also be symptoms of autism, and even with the non-overlapping bits, a lot of Kaito’s idiosyncrasies that I linked to ADHD could be interpreted slightly differently to link them to autism instead. I believe ADHD fits him somewhat better than autism does, but then I’m more knowledgeable about ADHD so my data is skewed, plus I’m pretty obviously biased since I’m personally invested in the idea of Kaito being like me. Taking a step back from my more specific headcanon here, though, there’s still every reason to assume that Kaito is at least some flavour of neurodivergent, and I think that’s pretty awesome.)

#danganronpa v3 #danganronpa v3 spoilers #kaito momota #character analysis #kaito's hero issues #ramble #adhd #adhd headcanons #creating that tag because i can already tell kaito won't be the only adhd headcanon i make #oh my god this ended up *longer* than the hero ramble how did this happen #and yes i will link to the hero ramble in every single other kaito ramble because it is always important #i also talked about myself in this more than i ever usually do on here so uh #personal?

[beautifulterriblequeen]

How is this that everyone thinks Ethari is the messy one and Runaan is the tidy guy?

I was thinking about this while making a stupid meme. But I finally recieved my book today (*Hallelujah chorus inserted*) and of course I already started to read it.

And what am I seeing? Rayla doesn’t know a thing (well, let’s say at least one or two) about the binding ritual, or the shadow hawk. She never saw it, only “heard” about this, she’s talking about it like legends she heard of and wasn’t even sure it was real. 

And yet, Runaan told her “you know it doesn’t work that way”.

But… arf! I may have the feeling Runaan could have, maybe… forgot to fill her in? Like “hey, little moonray, you’ll have to bind yourself, and once it’s done, you can’t cut it off. Nothing can, so beware, if you ever think about letting your target go or find something who could change everything…

And now I’m comparing this with the superbly tidy forge of Ethari, with every weapons in order, and all…

Unless you have something to prove me wrong, my new HC is that Runaan is only tidy in appearance but a real mess privately (and not only in his head when Ethari is around :3), and that Ethari is the the real one who keeps everything in order. 

:D

(sorry, two post in one day, didn’t mean to spam you but it just hit me and so I came here again)

________________

Come by all you like, @lily-lilou​. It’s all good! I’m so glad you got your copy of the book, yay!

It’s kind of a lot, huh, the difference. I feel we’re still kind of shuffling through it as a fandom, making notes in margins, flipping back and forth, maybe setting it down and watching the show again for another look at some scenes.

I think we infer Ethari’s messy habits because of his hair, which, man, he really doesn’t deserve. Look at that workshop! It’s immaculate! His desk is so perfectly tidy! Everything is so beautifully organized and mounted. This elf is a whole-ass nerd who plans his projects down to the nth degree. And then covers them in swirlies.

But everyone has a weakness. Ethari’s seems to be his hair. And his unbridled affection for his husband, really, it seems genuinely more than he can handle, since it seems to be literally killing him to have lost Runaan.

I’ve headcanoned Ethari as da Vinci-esque since before we knew his name, because his trick weaponry creations were so fabulous. But true geniuses aren’t any bigger people than anyone else. Their brains are exactly the same size. They just put all their points into INT. There’s always a trade-off somewhere. So: messy hair and uncontrollable attachment, and maybe stuff like self-worth issues, but it seems like a lot of Moonshadows suffer from that. 

The messiest thing about Ethari is his feelings, and I think a lot of us can relate to that.

On to Runaan: His appearance is indeed meticulous, but we been knew his gay disaster ass was freaking out on the daily while trying to court Ethari. Runaan only looks like he has his shit together, and he seems to work very hard at that illusion. Partly because I’m sure it’s heavily expected of him.

We also know that he’s not the sort to care about much other than his few interests. A true hyperfocusing boi here. Rayla’s history grade? Meh. Only PE matters, and she excelled at that. It does seem odd that if Runaan is so into his assassiny ways, he wouldn’t pass all that knowledge on to Rayla. Did he just leave pamphlets lying around and expect her to read them?

And here we start to tiptoe into dark territory: the book and the show don’t have to match up, and weren’t meant to match up. They deliberately changed some book scenes when they could’ve written it exactly like the show, because they had a different approach to the plot and the characters. A Unified Theory of TDP isn’t a thing. We have the show. We have this book. We have fanfic and fanart. This story isn’t a single-trunked tree. It’s a moonberry bush. Will that be confusing? Probably, here and there. I see it as getting a taste of being Moonshadow elves and having to get used to the illusion of things. Sometimes we dive all the way down into deep dark theories. And sometimes it’s okay to just enjoy the pretty reflections on the surface.

There’s probably quite a bit to your headcanon that Ethari is the more organized one, but I think each husband has his strengths and organization in different ways. Maybe Ethari keeps the house tidy because Runaan genuinely can’t grasp the purpose of a clothing hamper and goes blind around piles of unfolded laundry. Shopping lists? Probably Ethari. And he’s definitely the one in charge of the couple’s social calendar. Runaan doesn’t even want a social calendar.

But Runaan’s gonna be the one who tells Ethari to go to bed on time. He needs his sleep or he might get hurt working. Runaan’s got their garden organized precisely and keeps everything watered and fertilized, because life is precious. He’ll harvest their carrots and pick the moonberries and bring it all to Ethari to prepare.

They definitely sit together to shuck corn and shell peas, though. Teamwork makes the dream work.

Thanks again for the ask!

#asks #runaan #ethari #ruthari #runaari #elf husbands #tdp speculation #submission