#so idk why its always such a big deal in fiction when a character wants to die because everyone wants to die a little bit | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

always-andromeda · 2 years

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bit of a weird question sorry and if you want to ignore this it’s totally fine, but i wanted to know your thoughts, which of Paul’s characters do you think would be the most supportive of the reader coming out to them as asexual? like i think Joby and Thaddius would be the worst about it but Klitz would be super sweet and honestly i think Hank would cry to hear that there’s actually a term for how he feels once the reader explains to him what it is, i headcanon him as ace but maybe other people feel differently about him

idk i’ve been struggling coming to terms with my own asexuality and it’s like damn i have a real love/hate relationship with thinking about which of his characters would still want to imaginarily date me, i mean yeah they can all be headcanoned and act however and whatever i want them to be, but in their real ‘in-character’ mode how would some of them would feel about it? and no you won’t hurt my feelings if you have different ideas than mine btw i just want to talk about this with someone and hear their thoughts before i go crazy from holding it all in my head forever ://

first of all, let me say that I am honored that you'd come to me with this thought. this isn't weird or anything at all. I am hoping that my account feels like a safe space to share these things and I hope that's a vibe that continues to be maintained. second, I love you. above the fanfiction and the daydreaming and the little fictional guys we fantasize about, I love you. you are valued and you are valid. you are always free to send me an ask or a message, I love hearing from my followers no matter what. thank you for sending in this ask, lovely. please take care of yourself. 💖✨

That being said, I have thoughts on characters that would be most accepting! (a preface: I, myself, am very much not asexual so bare with me y’all 😅)

✰ Dwayne Hoover (aged up) ✰

This guy...in my mind...when he gets older, he is so progressive. Like he generally doesn't care what you identify as. And not in like a "haha, fuck your pronouns" kind of way. Just like "oh, you go by this name now? okay." or "oh, this is your sexuality? cool."

He doesn’t even have to fully understand it to be supportive and kind about it. His mindset is just…fuck it. Some people just don’t feel or prioritize sexual attraction and that’s normal too. He values making emotional and mental connections with people greatly and wouldn’t pressure you at all into doing physical things.

✰ Hank ✰

I've never seen Hank headcanoned as asexual? But now that you mention it, I can totally see it! Sex feels so foreign to him? Almost clinical. He doesn’t understand why so many people think it’s such a big deal. Because it’s never been a big deal for him. It's just another building block of the human experience that no matter how he looks at it, he can't wrap his mind around it. All he knows its that most people like sex...so should he like it too?

Learning that there is a word for it and that it's not an experience that is exclusive to him would be so emotional for him. I can imagine him feeling found. Because this thing that he's tried so hard to understand and to enjoy...he's finally learning that it's okay that sex just isn't his cup of tea. So having you come out to him would be a big time of discovery for himself as well. He'd definitely cry but he'd also have the largest, most genuine and sweet smile on his face for a very long time afterwards.

✰ Jay ✰

This man...he accepts any and all creatures however they are and that includes humans in the sexuality department. All he knows is that he wants you to feel safe and comfortable and he is open to learning.

Like Dwayne, he heavily values having emotional connections with people. As long as your heart has the same love for life as his does, he would have no qualms whatsoever. And he’d go out of his way to learn? He’d be reading articles and doing his own research because he has a genuine hunger for knowledge. Anything to enhance his understanding of the world and of his partner.

✰ Louis Ives ✰

I heavily headcanon Louis being asexual themselves? They just don't seem to be that interested in sex, in my opinion! But I see them being heavily under informed about asexuality and having a similar moment to what you described with Hank.

They would be so overwhelmed learning that they aren’t alone. There’s a word for what they’ve always felt! It would be heavily comforting to them to know that they don’t have to force themselves to be domineering and masculine and craving sex all of the time. Having a partner that feels the same way would be such a relief for them? Because for once in Louis’ life, they don’t have to hide or pretend or try to make themselves into something they’re not. They can just be.

✰ Simon Feck ✰

Simon is a science geek. Yes, he’s more into the realm of technology but he’s taken a few biology classes. He knows about sexual attraction and reproduction and all of those terms. So he's pretty familiar with the concept of asexuality by the time someone may come out to him.

I imagine him being slightly asexual as well. At the very least, he's quite impartial to sex, I think. Sex isn't that important to him when it comes to forming relationships. He mostly sees it as just another form of physical relief and I'd see him really only taking care of things just so the stress doesn't build up. Aside from that, he puts value in people who connect with him on his interests and will genuinely listen to him. So I see him not only being accepting of you but also somewhat relating to you and being comforted by that.

✰ Timothy Klitz ✰

Klitzy would be confused, I’m not gonna lie. It would probably take a lot of explaining to get him to understand. Like he simply had no idea that some people just don’t feel or prioritize sexual attraction. But he’s so sweet about it. Hesitantly asks questions. Quietly nods and contemplates whatever you tell him. Maybe his questions get a little too invasive but he doesn't mean any harm and will profusely apologize.

He gets nervous when it comes to sexual contact because of his own insecurities. His friends often pressure him into thinking that he has to be sexually active as well. So, if anything, I think he’d be super appreciative of a significant other that slows things down and is interested in him on other levels aside from sexual. I think it would give him a chance to fully embrace and become comfortable with his own being.

#danonation #paul dano #danocel #dwayne hoover #hank swiss army man #jay okja #louis ives #simon feck #timothy klitz #˚ʚ meda writes ɞ˚

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haleigh-sloth · 3 years

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I have a question but why do you think so many people are against Dabi/Touya getting a redemption arc or getting saved? Like some are against him being saved but are all down for Shiggy and Toga to be saved? I usually see the same argument and it’s frustrating! Like before I explain myself just want to say I’m not hating on Shiggy or do I feel like he’s any less worth saving but I see these arguments that leave me baffled. So the arguments I have seen before is some people don’t think Dabi/Touya can be redeemed or saved because he has murdered 30+ people, but like Shiggy has probably killed the same amount of not more people so that logic doesn’t really cut it. So why does it make a difference? Like why are people so against Dabi/Touya being saved or redeemed?

Well, I'll start this by saying that Shigaraki has ABSOLUTELY KILLED MORE PEOPLE HOLY SHIT DUDE. It's not even up for debate 😂 that boy flattened two cities with the touch of a hand. Shiggy is my favorite hands down and I'll defend the boy til I die but he has done so much more damage. That's kind of the point to his arc--actually. But anyways~

Content Warning of abuse below the cut a bit further down--

So with that--I've wondered the same thing you're asking. Why is Touya getting so much hate? Why not redeem him? Well, there's a few reasons that I have seen:

Endeavor- This is the first and foremost reason I can see for Touya having so many antis. This is something I can't grasp or fathom--Why do so many people like Endeavor? Or more like--why do so many people want to see an abuser thrive and his victim be put down? I can understand wanting to see an abuser better himself AND wanting to see the victim thrive, and I can see people wanting the abuser to be put down and the victim to thrive. But to just want the abuser to come out on top? No. Fuck you. (not you anon). So for whatever reason that I cannot fathom, people can't stand the idea of Touya surviving, being saved and redeemed, because it means that Enji has failed (which he already has but--again I really don't understand that side of the fandom and quite frankly I don't want to). So yeah, Endeavor has a lot of ridiculous fans. Hawks- I've already talked about how ridiculous some of the Hawks-stans are. I'm sorry but---they're fucking ridiculous. Some of them need to step away from their computer, go outside, breath some outside air, and shut the fuck up. And let me tell you---we sometimes joke about how the hero-stan side of the fandom lacks critical thinking skills and can't read past the surface--but I want to disagree with to an extent. I can tell you right now, Hawks's stans saw THIS:

And they knew. Seeing Hawks remain in the dark while Dabi walked toward the light. They knew what this was foretelling. And they didn't like it. And then this happened:

And they DEFINITELY did not like that. And then Dabi went and made fried chicken out of him and they found more reason to hate him with all their being. Hawks was kind of set up to die heroically--and even though his arc is pretty bad right now, I still think that at this point that’s the best ending for him. For me, he’s gone too long without even remotely thinking of changing his ideologies, and has been backing Endeavor unquestionably for a bit too long now. It’s just not looking good for him survival-wise. And his stans either SEE this very clearly and are in denial and need something to hate in order to deal with it, OR they really just aren’t looking as deep into the story as they need to. Those panels I used above though honestly tell it all. That being said he very well may survive and not have any consequences from his low point at all--but then he gets thrown in the “BNHA’s shittiest written arcs” pile. But whatever.

Also--shoutout to the blogs I follow and people I talk to who genuinely LOVE Hawks’s character but like--aren’t ridiculous about it and don’t harass people in their inboxes about it. Who also try to understand his character and not just make him out to be a uwu baby that never did anything wrong. TRUE Hawks-stans if I ever saw em.

Shouto--This is FAR less common than the other two reasons, but I have seen a few people who think this. They love Shouto (understandably--he’s a fluffy boy who needs a hug from his big brother Touya), but they think that Touya is going to be Shouto’s “final boss”, or his mortal enemy or something. Which--idk if they just refuse to read into Shouto’s awesome character on purpose or not, but he is not about to go out there and try to kill his big brother, who he never got to know, who he KNOWS suffered because of their father, and who is very very clearly in physical, mental, and emotional pain. Again--Shouto-stans are a far less part of the problem. But I’ve seen this misunderstanding of Shouto’s character go around a few times.

This next one is also big, and kind of falls into the same category with Endeavor up top--but it’s such a huge issue that I’m seeing that it needs its own paragraph: People don’t understand children’s behaviors, abuse, abusive family dynamics, and just child psychology in general. Child psychology is hard to understand--but also very simple. It’s hard as an adult to think back to how black and white the world was when you were a kid. Your parents were your safe place--they were your guardians. Or rather--they were supposed to be. This isn’t always the case though. And the Todoroki family exhibits a lot of realistic aspects of abuse. Even though the Todoroki backstory was very messily written--one thing is absolute: Endeavor emotionally abused his child. The issue is that Shouto’s and Rei’s physical abuse was shown FIRST in the story--and THEN we were shown what really happened with Touya wasn’t so easily identified as abuse (I mean it is--to me, but not to everybody). And people got stuck on comparing Touya’s and Shouto’s childhood instead of viewing them as two completely separate crimes Endeavor committed against his family. And they misunderstand Touya’s behaviors. Peep back at when I said that your parents are supposed to be your safe place--well, for Touya, Enji WAS his safe place, his guardian, his world. And then suddenly all of that disappeared without reason (good reason I mean). And that takes a serious toll on a child. I could honestly go on and on and on about this topic in particular but it’s not necessary for this ask. The point is---people don’t think Touya was actually abused or that he suffered as a child. They seriously lack an understanding when it comes to stuff like that. And they aren’t shy about showing it to the rest of the internet.

The last reason which I think kind of encompasses all of these reasons: People don’t understand redemption arcs--because they’re not your run of the mill Heroes vs. Villains story. It makes it to where it’s not clearly obvious whose side you should take. I guess people don’t like that---but I love it. Why not take BOTH sides?

You get to have more fun this way imo. You get to watch and see how the two sides come together--rather than just stick to one ideology til the end. I think it’s because people don’t like having their ideals, beliefs, and values challenged. It may be personal for some people--but forgiveness is a touchy subject as well. And I also think a lot of people very much think that the rules of our reality should exist within fiction. People forget that fiction exists for us to escape reality--I don’t know why this is so easily forgotten. But what’s cool about fictional stories is that everybody can have a happy ending--no matter how many atrocities they committed, people they hurt/killed, because guess what? NOBODY ACTUALLY GOT HURT!

But anyway---these are the conclusions I’ve come to regarding why Touya has so many haters. Some are legitimate reasons (the last two I listed) and some are just outright ridiculous (the first three I listed).

I’m not bothered though. I would LIKE to say that when these villain-saving chapters come out I’ll laugh hysterically at all the villain-haters’ reactions---BUT I already blocked almost all of them. 😂

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lvlyhao · 3 years

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『127′s ideal type』

headcanons, NCT 127

A/N: je suis back~ in these headcanons i talk about the type of person i imagine each member with, along with some of the traits i think they wouldn’t be too fond of. i did NOT include physical traits (ex: “would like a short/tall/blonde s/o”) because i really don’t know them??? lmao also that kind of thing could be a bit damaging to someone’s self esteem, and i want yall to know ur perfect & beautiful so

mark and hyuck will be included in dream’s version of this, and sicheng will be in wayv’s :)

today’s gif theme is just random gifs i like bc idc, there’s no aesthetic

as always, this is gender-neutral

IF YOU LIKE MY WORK PLEASE REBLOG IT AS WELL AS LIKING IT T^T

𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓻𝓮𝓼: fluff (♡) and if you squint really hard angst (❆) bc of some REALLY small things that for me are not actual angst but oh well

𝓦𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼: i think none?? if you read this and find something you think should be here let me know please!!!

word count: 1.5K

pairing: nct 127 members x reader (includes taeil, taeyong, johnny, yuta, doyoung, jaehyun, jungwoo)

disclaimer: the characters in the story below do not reflect real people or present real facts. this is purely fictional, and you may not copy, change, translate or repost my work in any way. all rights reserved © cherry-hyejin 2021.

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:

Taeil

I see Taeil getting with someone who’s not only mature (personality-wise, actual age doesn’t matter) but also very determined and decisive. He’d like a person that doesn’t change their mind about things too often, learns well from their mistakes and is just all-around balanced. Other traits that I think he’d look for: politeness, a MUST; grounded; good at giving advice. Pretty much a twin-flame of his.

I think he’d find it cute if they think in a detail-oriented way and appreciate the small things in life. A positive, grateful mentality would be SO attractive to him, I swear.

One of his deal breakers would most likely be excessive jealousy and possessiveness. He trusts you and your love for him, and I think he’d feel distraught if you were constantly questioning the relationships he has with other people (friends, co-workers, fans, etc.)

Last important thing: needs a person that can take a hit. He’s probably looking for someone he can spend the rest of his days with, so a quitter just isn’t good for that. There will be difficult moments in the future and he needs to know they won’t give up on him and on the life he chose.

Taeyong

I think Taeyong would like a calm person that knows how to take control of the relationship. He probably feels tired sometimes from leading a group of 23 people, so I can imagine he’d be thrilled if he was able to not worry at all when he’s around his partner. He trusts they’re capable of dealing with any problems that may arise and keep their feet on the ground. Bonus points if they have a good relationship with themselves.

By that I mean: you know how people say you can’t truly love others until you love yourself? Yeah, that. He’s a person like any other, and there are times when he struggles with self-love, but he needs someone that doesn’t hate themselves, or he’ll simply go crazy. With his career come so many rumours and moments that tear at his confidence… he just doesn’t need a person that has to be convinced every single day that they’re worthy of the good things in life.

I’d say, in general, all he asks for is someone that can watch out for themselves. He’d take care of them too, but he’d like it SO much if just for once in his life he’s the one being cared for. Would just melt on the spot if you have that caring, almost parental instinct in you. Gods, yes. That’s all I can say.

Johnny

I can see him being with a very bright, smart person. He’d like someone that comes from a different background so he could learn more about their life—whether that means the country they were born in or their field of work. I think he would appreciate a very laid back person that doesn’t get stressed too often and won’t make fun of him for his bad jokes. Also, doesn’t like people that try to play him. Honesty above all.

He’d like it if they are super curious and creative, too. Picking up new hobbies and interests is something he’d be up to anytime, and it doesn’t matter what it is either. He’d give anything a try—from knitting to marine biology, no questions asked.

Something he’d dislike is if the person is too materialistic. It’s not like he’s a completely spiritual being and lives with 0 detachments to objects but he’s a firm believer in what Antoine de Saint-Exupéry said: what is essential is invisible to the eye. And, you know, what you truly find essential is up to you; it can mean family, friends, love, hope, all of that… he just wants you to love life itself as much as he does.

Yuta

He’d probably like one of the two drastic variants: a very gentle, sweet person or someone who’s on his level of flirtatiousness and boldness. Wouldn’t mind any, but he needs a strong personality, either way, you know? No blandness here.

Something very attractive to him is being involved in social issues and caring for the world around you. Very sexc, yes, and also likes people that make others smile.

Something that would make him quite literally give up on someone is the excessive fear of change, or just the will to remain in their comfort zone at all costs. He earns for a person that wants to live life to its fullest. If not they’re not ride-or-die to that level, then he hopes they at least accompany and support him in all of the things he wants to do.

One thing that is very tied to that is his dislike for know-it-alls. He lives in such a diverse scenario that it’s just dumb for him to think someone would ever be capable of knowing every piece of information on everything that’s out there. He’s fine with people making mistakes, but if they can’t admit to that or admit they don’t know something he just gets pissed off. So, yeah, he’d avoid stuck-ups.

Doyoung

He’d like someone very loyal and fair, who treats people with respect but calls them out if they ever have to. I think he’d prefer a person that is naturally a deep thinker and wouldn’t lose their mind over small disagreements.

Much like Johnny, he likes that intellectual side of yours, and when I say that I don’t mean like “ah, he’d want to date a math genius” or something. No, no. I’m referring to all types of intellectuality and intelligence. The thing for him is simply using your brain and being proud of it. He would just dislike a person that kind of lives life on autopilot, you know?

He’d like it if they’re interested or professionally involved with music somehow and would consider their opinions in his career. He wouldn’t mind if their taste is hugely different from his, though. It’s alright if pop music is not your favourite or if you have no idea who EXO is (lol). All he wants is to see the world through your eyes too, in all aspects of life including this one.

Will also love you forever if you side with him when he’s being teased by the others, because, c’mon, it’s always 22 people against poor, defenceless Doyoung. Please don’t join them, he’s begging you—

Jaehyun

This is very, very clear to me but he needs to be with an independent person. He’s quite sentimental and he has his more romantic moments, sure, but he wants someone that can give him the space he needs when he needs it. A person that’s constantly begging him for attention would be way more of a burden than anything else.

Also, he’s 100% alright with someone that has a very explicit and loud love language (like saying “I love you” 300 times a day) but he’s not like that, and he needs them to see that. Jaehyun could NOT be with a person that doesn’t appreciate the love he shows in the little things, like making coffee in the morning, and if they ever question the way he feels… yeah, not good. He’d feel misunderstood and that’s a big no-no.

He’d find it cute if they’re bubbly or just very youthful but is also capable of falling for an old soul that shares his interests in things like classical music and vinyls. I don’t think he’d ever get with someone that's kind of a tech addict, though, idk why but that’s quite clear to me. Always being on your phone or caring too much about social media would probably make him feel like you’re not grateful for the things you have around you, in real life. So, yeah, not attractive, bestie.

Jungwoo

Jungwoo is a very, very, very sweet person and he needs someone who’s also like that. He wouldn’t care if that’s there for everyone to see, in the sense that they’re not shy about it, or if it’s a part of them that only a couple of close people know. As long as it’s there, he’s happy.

Aside from that, I think he’s fully capable of falling in love with quite literally anyone. He can see the beauty in all types of people, from all places, backgrounds, races, and just—anyone. He’s just so full of love for people, ah I can’t even. He’s too good for this world.

Some things that could, however, push him away from getting to know someone: a negative way of thinking, being too traditionalistic, and too much scepticism. He’s fine with people that like to honour the past and their roots but like, you’ve gotta keep up with the world you live in and accept that things change. I think that’s very tied to how much he likes defying masculine standards, too.

The scepticism thing is quite simple: he can handle teasing just fine but if they’re constantly making fun of him for wearing his heart on his sleeve or being a bit goofy, he’d feel kind of betrayed.

---

final notes: this is the 3rd nct work i’m posting here and i’m already writing more, so i think it’s time i set up a masterlist, a fic rec blog and a tag list. if you want to be tagged in my future fics, let me know (dm, comments, anything) :)

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silentfcknhill · 3 years

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FAVORITE SHOWS IN POSTERS

Well, we’re back for another installment of this tagged meme, this time for TV shows! I also stole this from/was indirectly tagged by @jcmorrigan. My taste in shows also differs a bit from my taste in movies, as I tend to like a lot of comedy shows with not as many horror ones. I’m not into shows as much as movies overall, but there are some that I am very passionate about so I picked twenty again. So, here we go for part 2, in order:

1. Avatar: The Last Airbender/The Legend Of Korra (2005-2014)

I'm including these as one show since they take place in the same universe and tell a continuation of the same overall plot. Altogether this is probably the best piece of media to ever exist, including movies. It has so many great characters and villains especially and some of the most epic sequences, charming humor and heartwarming moments ever. I've never met a person who didn't like these shows, even people who normally don't like cartoons. My dad, who is biased against animation? He loved it. My mother? She loved it, watched it with her multiple times. My grandmother? Loved it. My ex-boyfriend? Loved it. My best friend? Loved it. I dare anyone not to, and I'm so glad it's making a resurgence since it's on Netflix for a new generation to enjoy.

2. Black Butler (2008-2014)

I never was big into anime growing up and only really started watching anime when I was like 16 and above, but this is one of the exceptions because holy shit is it ever dark and epic. I'm not sure I'd really recommend it for kids, it's more of a teens and young adults kind of anime and that's probably why it's so good, because it isn't afraid to explore dark and mature topics and do it with all of the intensity and gravitas required to do said topics justice. It has lots of great characters, and the story of demons who make deals with children who have a dark side is fun to watch play out.

3. Seinfeld (1989-1998)

My dad was a huge fan of this show so I watched it growing up since I was a toddler and it became a classic for me. I've watched thw hole show through at least 8 times, and I'll never stop because it never gets old or boring. It's also my only comfort show when I'm having a panic attack because of one time a few years ago when I was having a drug-induced psychosis episode and watching it calmed me down, so now it's like the opposite of a trigger and whenever I'm having an episode or something I watch it to bring me back to reality. For that reason it's more than a show to me, it's a medical treatment and I'm forever grateful to it.

4. The Good Place (2016-2020)

The big four shows made my Michael Schur all made it on this post (The Good Place, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, The Office and Parks And Recreation), either in the main list of the honorable mentions, but this is my personal favorite of the four. It's so funny, quirky, relatable and basically tailor-made to suit my interests. Not only is it an entertaining and wholesome show, but I think watching it helped me come to terms with a lot of things like mortality, ethics, philosophy, religion and my relationships with other people. It gets alot of different viewpoints across and if you're a very analytical and philosophical person like me you'll probably enjoy seeing it all play out. Not to mention, every single character is 'favorite character' material. It's rare you find a show with no filler characters in the main cast, but I genuinely can't choose who is best.

5. Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013-?)

Another of Michael Schur's shows, this one is just barely under The Good Place and to be honest it was tough to pick my favorite between the two because they're both equally funny. I know it's kind of controversial right now because of the whole law enforcement thing, but I actually think they do a good job of handling social issues in the show and remaining respectful of real-life systemic problems. As for the characters, this is another one of those shows where every single character is gold and I think that tends to be a trend among Schur's shows in general. He produces damn good comedy, and damn good characters. I can't wait to see what they bring next.

6. Rick And Morty (2013-?)

This is unfortunately one of those cases of 'great show, horrible fandom' and for that reason I don't get involved in the fandom even though I love the show. It's a shame because it really is a great show, so funny and, again, such good characters. I think it's a lot more accessible than the fandom likes to claim, so I'm hoping more people will give it a chance and not get put off by the intellectual elitism of the fandom because it does have some of the most entertaining and batshit crazy episodes ever, poking fun of some of the staples of science fiction in media while also poking fun of itself the whole time. Unlike the fandom, the show doesn't take itself seriously and that's enjoyable nowadays.

7. Orange Is The New Black (2013-2019)

While this show is a comedy, it is also a lot of other things and it's probably made me ugly-cry just as many times as it's made me laugh. Well, maybe not as often, but those few scenes (if you've watched the show then you know the ones I'm talking about) made me hysterically sob hard enough to be worth like fifty minor sads. But I didn't even mind because the show is just that good, and it makes you /feel/ something in a real way. Probably because of just how real it gets in terms of telling stories that happen all the time in the real world, sometimes with inevitably tragic endings. But these things do happen every day, and it's important to shine a light on that. It's not just representation for LGBTQ+ but also for POC, the neurodiverse, the poor, and many more. Give it a watch to broaden your perspective!

8. Big Mouth (2017-?)

This is probably the grossest show I've ever seen but by god is it ever funny. Maybe it's because I have an immature sense of humor or something, but I love this show. It definitely won't be everyone's cup of tea and I don't recommend you watch this show with anyone else around because it will get awkward. I think part of its appeal to me is that everyone I talk to who likes it considers it so relatable to their lives growing up but for someone like me who grew up on the autism and asexual spectrum and who was physically an early-bloomer by years, nothing about this show is relatable to me in any way so it makes it all the more crazy and bizarre watching how the people around me must have experienced things. Did y'all really have these experiences with puberty in middle school???

9. Dexter (2006-2013)

I recently heard that this show is coming back for a reboot soon and I'm so excited because this is my absolute favorite drama/thriller show, as evidenced by the fact that it's the highest one on the list so far that isn't a comedy. I love the idea of having a protagonist who is sort of a villain (or at least morally dubious), and the idea of a serial killer who only kills bad people is particularly satisfying for some reason. Maybe because he's the vigilante we all deserve and want in this unjust and evil world of modern times? Idk but the very premise of this show set it up for big things and aside from the ending I think it delivered consistently.

10. Once Upon A Time (2011-2018)

This show took us on some journeys, and you can't deny that. Sure, maybe it didn't always finish what it started and didn't always end in the most satisfying way, but part of its charm is that you didn't care because the experience was just so much fun. They took characters and stories that have been told to death and somehow managed to put a unique and unexpected twist on them, and that alone is admirable. Good twists, good villains, and pretty much every cliffhanger known to man will keep you hooked on binge-watching every episode.

11. RuPaul's Drag Race (2009-?)

A bit different than the other entries on my list in that it's not fiction but a reality competition show, but I couldn't leave Drag Race out because it's just so fucking iconic and perfect. Even when you disagree with the judges or can't stand a certain contestant you'll still be having a good time. It's got the personalities you love to love, the ones you love to hate, and the comedy that's completely meme-able. I mean just how much has this show contributed to pop culture and the internet? More than most of us, henny. I've watched every single season, even the international ones and all of the spinoffs. This show will probably be on for another thirty years when Ru is throwing shade from a hospital bed and I'll still be watching.

12. House (2004-2012)

Some people hate on this show, and I don't get it. I love House. Yes, he's an ass. That's the point. He's supposed to be unlikeable, and that's why I like him. Maybe because I always love the rude, sarcastic, misanthropic jerkass-genius characters for some reason. And I also love procedural shows, so it's a win-win. I also work in the healthcare field so it appeals to me for that reason too, because obviously the whole premise is outlandish which is what makes it funny. Of course it's not realistic for a hospital, so just enjoy the absurdity and don't get too hung up on the details of medical accuracy and professional ethics and you'll be fine.

13. The Office (2005-2013)

The third of Michael Schur's show and the last one that made the main list (sorry Parks And Rec, I love you too but there was just so many good shows to choose from and I saw you last so the nostalgia isn't as strong!) I don't think I need to hype this show up any, it's already a classic and you can't even turn around online without getting hit in the face by a dozen Office memes. You'll have to pry this show and it's relatable characters (especially Michael Scott) from my cold, dead hands.

14. All Hail King Julien/The Penguins Of Madagascar (2008-2017)

Like Avatar/Korra, I also consider this as one show for the sake of this list because it also takes place in the same universe (Madagascar, specifically) and I just couldn't choose one over the other because they're both so perfect. They're funny and I love all the characters (it cut out the weaker links of the Madagascar film series and just focuses on expanding the standout side-characters like King Julien and the penguins). It also delved into some lore, particularly the first show, and even though I didn't also agree with the directions it took (you may have seen me get salty about the ending because I cared too much), I can't deny how much I love it.

15. Bones (2005-2017)

One of the other scarce non-comedy shows on this list, it still has it's funny moments. It's also, like House, another procedural show that involves some medical stuff, but this time on a more scientific and forensic level which is even more interesting. It's nice to see a lead female with Asperger's, too. There's a lot of cop/law enforcement shows where they try to solve crimes, but this one is the best, and I'm saying that as a fan of CSI as well. Don't fight me on this, I'm right. Oh yes, it's corny, it's campy, it's cheesy, but I love every minute of it. Don't watch if you have a weak stomach though.

16. The Simpsons (1989-?)

We all grew up with this show, don't lie. It's been around longer than most people on tumblr have even been alive. Should it have ended seasons ago? Hell yes. But that doesn't take away what the first like 20 or so seasons gave us (there's a lot of argument about when the show jumped the shark, for me it wasn't until much later than the popular consensus). The characters are amazing, but the secret to the show's longevity is that they always return to status quo and there's comfort and nostalgia in that. Bart will still be in 4th grade when you're out there pushing 90. This show is persistent. This show is eternal. This show will outlive us all.

17. Ash Vs. Evil Dead (2015-2018)

Sorely underrated. This show is hilarious, gruesome and campy as hell and I love it. I don't think you necessarily have to watch the Evil Dead movies beforehand in order to get the plot of the show, although it would probably help. In my opinion this show ended way too soon and I'm hoping someday we'll get a comeback because Ash is the reluctant, self-absorbed hero we all need and it's 2020 so at this point there really might actually be a demon-zombie apocalypse and who's gonna save us then if not for the impulsive womanizer with a chainsaw for a hand?

18. Malcolm In The Middle (2000-2006)

Another show I grew up with, I don't think it gets as much credit as it deserves. It has some damn funny episodes and great characters, and it did a lot of the popular sitcom tropes before they were 'cool'. Some other great sitcoms, The Middle in particular, took a lot of influence from this show and it helped pave the way for the future of sitcoms at a time when they were about to make a comeback. If you want a good show about the real experiences of growing up, this is a much more accurate representation of the highs and lows of being an awkward tween from a dysfunctional home.

19. A Series Of Unfortunate Events (2017-2019)

Unlike most people I actually liked the movie version from the early 2000's, and I read the books growing up so I was excited when I saw there was a live action television adaptation of it on Netflix because I felt like they cancelled the movie franchise too soon. I was interested to see how new actors would handle the roles, and I was not disappointed. I wouldn't say I liked either portrayal of the characters better or worse, they both added their own twist to it and this show is a great and loyal adaptation to the books, probably because the author was so heavily involved. He knew just when to stick to the books and when to improve upon what he had done with the benefit of hindsight. This show is basically the books, but remastered.

20. Winx Club (2004-?)

Sort of an odd one out on this list, but I really love this show even as an adult and it may surprise you to learn it is still going on and the most recent season came out last year. They take big breaks sometimes in between seasons, but it's still going strong and in multiple countries. The only thing I don't like about watching this show is all the different and inconsistent dubs since the original show is Italian and each dub only goes for a couple seasons so by the time you get used to one set of voices/names for the characters oyu have to abruptly switch to another, but it's still worth it for the beautiful animation and cool characters (especially the villains!)

Honorable Mentions:

13 Reasons Why, America's Next Top Model, American Horror Story, Arrested Development, Bates Motel, Battlestar Galactica, Black Mirror, Care Bears, Chernobyl, Courage The Cowardly Dog, Criminal, CSI, Duck Dodgers, Goosebumps, Kenny Vs. Spenny, Kim Possible, Kingdom Hospital, Lazytown, Lost, Making A Murderer, Mayday, Mindhunter, Modern Family, Monster High, Obsession: Dark Desires, Parks And Recreation, Prison Break, Project Runway, Queer As Folk, Queer Eye, Salem, Schitt's Creek, SCTV, Spongebob Squarepants, The Emperor's New School, The Good Doctor, The Haunting Of Hill House/Bly Manor, The Middle, The Pretender, The Walking Dead, The X-Files, Through The Wormhole, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Unsolved Mysteries, Yugioh

Tagging: @bullet-farmer and anyone else who wants to!

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annqbthchse · 3 years

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Agathas casting + Sofia Wylie

hi I just chugged 2 redbulls, ranted to my friend for like an hour about this because the amount of absolute disrespect and just plain racism i've seen about the casting infuriates me. so here are some of the comments i've seen and my opinion/reaction to them (this is literally just a passionate brain explosion done quite late at night -10pm- and vv quickly so I apologise if some points are missing/worded weirdly!!)

“she isn’t how she looks in the books” || “i’m all for diversity but [🙄] why did they make the pale one a POC” || “it doesn’t make sense for agatha to be played by a black actress”

for those saying it doesn't make sense for agatha to be plated by a black women,,, what are you talking about!!! IT ACTUALLY DOES THO???? if anything it makes more sense and adds more weight to her storyline and character arc! her entire arc is realising she has been beautiful ALL ALONG. its just her low self esteem and the impossibly and very eurocentric high beauty standards that's she's up against at the school for good & in Gavaldon keeping her down. having agatha being played by a WOC is perfect because that is something we unfortunatly have to face on a daily basis. it makes for a wider range of people to see agatha and her experiences and be able to relate to someone whose place in society mirrors their own. and isn’t that great??? SHOULDN’T WE WANT THAT????yes. we should.

as a WOC myself, when i found out the news I literally called my friend at like 8am to be like “HOLY SHIT :DDDD” its exciting!! i know that a lot of people loved agatha because they could relate to her and that's great! but you still have that!! book agatha isn’t going anywhere. she's still there! like i've said before, Sofia as agatha allows MORE people to be able to relate to her character. This is an amazing decision and these kind of changes in the adaptation should be welcomed and encouraged. i

and also you can’t just pick and choose what characters can/cannot be black. that literally makes 0 sense and isn’t how it works. having agatha - one of the films lead- as a WOC is a big deal and suggesting that instead have the side characters have diverse actors infuriates me. why does it have to be a side character??? it makes as much sense for agatha to be black as it does any other side character and sofia is perfect!

ALso Soman (who first published SGE in 2013) probably just used whatever beauty standards at the time and ran with it. but hey, it's literally 2020 and if this year has taught us anything it's that times are changing! casting a diverse lead for a book that has a predominantly white cast reflects that change! its great! tbh before the casting news, i was very apprehensive about the movie because of some of the problematic themes and events that occur but this casting is the step in the right direction! it shows that at least on some level the people making the movie are all aware of its wrongdoings and adapting the movie to better fit and reflect a wider audience in 2020.which is what we all (or at least should) want!!

“She doesnt have straight black hair so she can’t possibly play agatha”

first of all her hair is gorgeous!!! and does it really matter that she wont have straight hair??? will you die if one fictional character doesn't have straight hair?? no. you won't. and she shouldn’t have to straighten, use relaxers or wear a wig to play the role. hollywood has a long standing history of making diverse (predominantly Black!!) actresses having to fit Eurocentric beauty standards LIKE having straight hair. and using relaxes can also be a really traumatising and degrading experience for black women and its unfair for people demand that she can only play agatha if she “fixes” her hair. and yea again it has some very racist undertones. but dudes this is HAIR we’re talking about people. it's such a stupid finicky detail to hyperfocus on that won’t even affect the plot or the movie in any big way. I for one would love to see Sofia play Agatha with her beautiful, gorgeous, natural hair!

we all have our different interpretations and visions of agatha and that's ok! but with that and the movie you have to be realistic. there is no way they could’ve casted the ‘perfect’ agatha. even if they did stick to her book descriptions. you can't please everyone and people will always have opinions and something to say about it

“I can’t see her as agatha because of her previous disney roles”

bruh it's called acting. and you know another famous actress known for the classic disney roles and is now an emmy award winning actress?? ZenDAYA. yea. stfu. we haven’t even seen them in their full costumes or anything, hell this is really the first big information that we’ve had! give it some time,,, lets see the rest of the cast, the costumes, the sets and THEN decide if “she's not my agatha” c’mon guys!! she's insanely talented (a triple threat at 16!!!) and criticising her casting of agatha based on one photo - which literally says nothing about her performance- does have some severe racist undertones no matter how many times you try to defend yourself using the classic “i’m not racist but-” excuse.

The people who casted her are literal professionals. they do this for a LIVING and have been for ages. SO ofc they would’ve casted the perfect person for the role. these are the same people who casted Harry Potter. pls just have faith in the process. they don’t want the movie to be a flop any more than we do. they picked her for a reason and i'm sure that in time we will see the exact same reasons they do

“I wanted asian agatha so i’m very disappointed in this casting”

I get it, I do but honestly,, c’mon dude A WIN FOR ONE OF US IS A WIN FOR ALL!! all minorities are all severely underrepresented in hollywood rn and idk about y’all but i’m taking this as a massive win for all us POC regardless of whether she's black, brown or asian.

“Sofias too beautiful” || “Agatha's supposed to be ugly >:(”

Agatha has literally been “beautiful all along”. the problem isn’t that she's ugly, its just that she's had impossibly low self esteem and doesn't see herself that way because of the impossibly high (mostly eurocentric) beauty standards she's held against. and with the ugly casting??? you really want them to put out a casting call specifically calling for someone ugly?? what would that even entail?? dudes The Lord of the Rings TV show tried that shit here in NZ a lil bit ago and it did NOT go down well lmao. you can’t just cast an ‘ugly’ person. also ‘hollywood’ ugly is still hot (e.g She's all That ) so idk what you guys were expecting????

pls remember Sofia is literally 16 (!!!!), she's so young and must’ve been SO excited to have gotten this role!! and if we can see all these comments, she definitely can so just be kind. ok

anyways,,,

Sofia is absolutely gorgeous and the perfect agatha and i’m very excited to see more of her ❤️

#sge #sofia wylie #school for good and evil #The School for Good and Evil #sge movie #school for good and evil movie #the school for good and evil movie #my post #Agatha of Woods Beyond #they've already casted her anyway so the only thing you can and should do anyway is be kind and supportive!

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gallavichthings · 3 years

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Hi guys! I, @thevioletjones, am back again as guest mod, because I wanted to be the one to talk to this week’s author, @lan-jev aka LanJevinson on AO3. She’s the writer of fandom classics, The New Year, and its sequel, Bird Set Free, as well as the equally bittersweet 1,000 Times. She also sometimes wrote more lighthearted fare like the Mickey Tries New Things series. She’s one of my fandom besties and we had fun reminiscing, so it's a loooong one. Enjoy!

VioletJones: Are you ready?

LanJevinson: Yep

Weirdly nervous lmao

VJ: lmao... why? It's just me

LJ: Idk man

VJ: it's very much not a big deal... you'll be fine

First of all, why are you such an angsty bitch?

LJ: Lol

VJ: 😂💀I'm joking, but it's also a legitimate question. I just wanna know.

LJ: God, I have no idea. I just really love that feeling of reading (or writing) a fic that makes your heart break only to carefully pull it back together.

VJ: Obviously. That's your M.O. Lol

LJ: I have a hard time even reading fic without angst to be honest. It has to be a just-right fic in every other way

VJ: How do you balance the angst with the right amount of sweetness and resolution?

LJ: That’s a hard question. I think as the author we know our purpose and our characters and story so well that it can be difficult to make it satisfying for the reader in the end. I definitely haven’t hit it right for every reader! I’ve had comments expressing dissatisfaction with the resolution of my stories before. Primarily, I write for me—and if I’m satisfied with it, I write it that way.

VJ: I mean, at the end of the day, we have to execute our own vision. I've seen people modify their story based on what people tell them and you can always tell it would've been better had they stuck with the original plan.

That includes letting stories sprawl out without end and become repetitive as hell, imo. Lol

LJ: For sure. Not fun to read a fic that literally loses the plot midway through. Or writing a fic for the clout—because you know a/b/o is a trending trope, for example.

VJ: True. People who follow the trends get the hits.

Do you ever cater to what you think the audience wants, or are you always staunch about your inspiration and intention?

LJ: I have worried about the choices I made and if people would like it, but rarely enough to change the direction of a fic.

For every person that hates it, there’s going to be someone who likes it. And if not, I like it. Haha.

VJ: Lol. That's a good way to look at it. You know I get too caught up worrying about what people think, and I hate it so much.

LJ: I know. You’re so not alone in that though. I’m the anomaly.

VJ: Idk. Some people don't take it so seriously. You're lucky, though...

I feel like we know each other pretty much as well as two people who've never met in person can. Lol. What do you want the fandom at large to know about you?

LJ: I don’t know, I’m just really thankful to have stumbled into the fandom. It was my first time writing fic after a long break, my first time writing m/m fic, and in the case of The New Year in particular, my first time really letting my muse just take the reins. I’d written as a teenager, but was one of those people who assumed when my “life” began that I wouldn’t be into fanfic, but I am so glad to be wrong about that. In high school I dreamed of going to college for creative writing. I’ll probably never get around to writing original fiction, but writing fanfic has been so fulfilling.

VJ: When and what was your first time with fanfic and fandom?

LJ: I started writing fan fiction before I even knew it had a name, predictably, for Harry Potter around age 12? I kept a plastic container full of notebooks under my bed and filled them with ideas. I’ve always been a purist—canon divergent was my jam even from the beginning. I even published a few of them on ffnet. I vividly remember paying money by the minute to go onto a computer at LAX during a family vacation to check my email to see if I had any comments! During my later teenage years I wrote and published Gone with the Wind fanfic. Despite writing fic, I didn’t know what a ‘fandom’ even was until I searched for Shameless fic on the good old ffnet, somehow hopped over to AO3, and then subsequently discovered tumblr some months later.

And fandoms are such a trip. It’s really cool to gather with people who love the same characters and books and shows as you, but also sort of all-encompassing? For a while it felt like my life revolved around the Shameless fandom and fic. It was almost a relief when canon failed me and I started to step back.

VJ: Yeah, girl. You all left me. I keep trying to get to the other side. Lmao. Soon!

When did you join the Gallavich/Shameless fandom?

LJ: I started writing The New Year in April 2016 after I finished watching season 5. It feels like so long ago. I know it was just on the cusp of the first exodus of the “OG” writers.

VJ: Yeah, you came in right before I did. What made you want to write for them so badly?

LJ: It was mainly the shock of the season 5 ending that did it. I started out watching as a fan of the show in general, and wasn’t even super invested in Gallavich until later. But Gallavich was really the perfect ship for me— so many opportunities to write and read nuggets that weren’t included in the show, since the viewers saw so little of their relationship.

VJ: Yeah, it's pretty crazy to think about how little total airtime they've had together over the course of the entire show.

For those who don't get the reference, please explain the origins of LanJevinson and why you chose it as a pen name.

LJ: Lan Jevinson is the code name Dwight gives to Michael’s boss, Jan Levinson, when she unexpectedly joins them at Casino Night in the warehouse on The Office. I just love a good Office-themed pseudonym! I really wanted to use the Warhol-esque portrait Jan has of herself up in her office in one of the later seasons as my profile picture on AO3, but I couldn’t find one, so I went with Prison Mike instead. It always makes me laugh when I see the little picture pop up next to my name when I comment on fics.

VJ: Lmao. I love that it has nothing to do with the actual fandom. So random.

Have you ever thought about writing a fic that has a sitcom feel to it like The Office?

LJ: I’m firmly in the dramedy category. I’ve thought about writing some elements related to The Office, like the workplace setting and the mutual pining of coworkers, but without a lot of the comedic elements, and not for Shameless certainly. I’m way too anxious in real life to be quick-witted. I’m better in writing, but it’d be far out of my comfort zone!

VJ: What was the most fun aspect of writing Gallavich for you?

LJ: I’ll be honest, at the beginning it was more of a compulsion than something ‘fun’. Not to sound too hokey, but The New Year just had to be written, it almost felt like an out of body experience. I had the most fun with my one shot pieces, and it’s definitely because I could be creative in ways that I’d missed, but was still able to tether myself to canon, to write for characters to whom the readers needed no introduction. Also I just really freaking love mutual pining!

VJ: It doesn't sound hokey. I think the reason most people are compelled to write fic for the first time is that they want to see an exact idea executed in a way they haven't been able to find in someone else's fic yet.

And you get to ride the high of a newfound inspiration.

LJ: Which of your fics were you most compelled to write would you say?

VJ: Definitely the first one. Backdrifting. It can happen with fics that come later, but I think there's something about the first idea and the way it becomes an obsession until you just start writing it.

LJ: I remember reading it and it felt so refreshing—you never avoid real-life things, like having other partners or past history, or not falling head over heels immediately. It’s not Backdrifting, but a different one of yours I remember commenting how so true to life the dialogue and relationship was. Like conversations I’d have in my own marriage.

VJ: Aw, thanks. Realism is something I appreciate in my fiction. Lmao. I do remember that you would sometimes try to dissuade me from writing stuff that you thought the fandom wouldn't go for, particularly in regards to Mickey. Like, I wrote Bad Date to prove you wrong that the premise wasn't perfect for them. Lollll... Did you ever hold back because of stuff going on in canon or the fandom? Ideas you thought wouldn't fly so you suppressed them?

LJ: Did I try to dissuade you from writing stuff?? Damn I’m a bad friend lol. The publishing of my Big Bang fic [1,000 Times] was really poorly timed although beyond my control. At the time the fandom was still recovering from the Mexico border goodbye (I think...), and I remember getting this long pleading comment from someone basically begging for me to give them a happy ending because the wounds were too raw from canon. I did agonize a bit about that before posting. And I worried a bit about giving Mickey a partner he loved and lost, as well as a second child in TNY. People still don’t understand my reasoning behind that one. It’s complicated but I don’t regret it, although I did worry how it would be received.

VJ: Yes, well, speaking of that whole mess, you also clowned me for how much I cried while reading your epic angst fest. I read both parts in full over like a long weekend or something, and I definitely got mad at you multiple times. Lol. And you called me a baby.

Anywayyyyy... I did plan on bringing it up, but you did first, so... What do you have to say to people who still think your treatment of Ian was harsh in The New Year series, and/or couldn't deal with your Mickey/OMC subplot?

LJ: I’ve never been one to shy away from con-crit if I think it’s deserved and written in good faith. As far as Mickey/OMC goes, I think that’s more of a personal preference thing. It’s unrealistic IMO to expect one or both of them to never hold strong feelings for another person while apart (though some may argue it’s less likely while in prison). As far as Ian goes, firstly I needed to come up with a rational explanation for the porch breakup in canon, which wasn’t easy. And then I had to further emotionally stunt him so he could leave Mickey to rot for eight years. From there he could only go up. It made sense at the time. Lol

Maybe I just wanted to punish him a little. It was a dark time for the Mickey Milkovich Deserves Better crew. Newer readers really can’t get into it. TNY series is one of those fics you ‘had to be there’ for.

VJ: Oh man, that's so true. I never was down for the Ian punishment though. You know this. But, me loving your writing despite all the pain it inflicts when I read it should be seen as a testament to your talent. Lmao. It hurts so good. I wouldn't sit through all that for just any writer.

Was there anything you ever struggled with when writing them?

LJ: Not them specifically, as far as their characterizations go (though I do find Mickey easier to write than Ian, generally), but I’ve never been great at fleshing out my stories with detail and descriptive emotions. I’ve tried not to write so bare bones, but I guess it doesn’t suit me.

VJ: You definitely have a clean and to-the-point style, unlike me. Lol. But yeah, it's what works for you, because that's your voice. Nothing wrong with that. I mean, obviously. You've gotten plenty of well-deserved compliments about your fics both here and in other fandoms.

Is Mickey being easier to write something that makes you prefer his POV, or do you enjoy writing Ian's POV too?

LJ: I like writing both, but Mickey is more fun to write because he’s funnier, more insecure, all around a bit more layered than Ian (IMO). Not that Ian isn’t interesting—he definitely is. But Ian’s harder to read. Maybe it’s partly the way the actors play their roles, too.

VJ: Do you think Ian being more of a blank canvas makes him easier to project onto? I think we've talked about relating more to Ian in some obvious ways, even though there's also emotionally relatable things about Mickey too.

LJ: Yeah, I think that could definitely be part of it! Writing Ian isn’t nearly as much of an escape as writing Mickey is, and I totally get why you and other authors like to keep Ian’s bipolar out of fics. I channeled myself into Ian in the last non-drabble piece I ever wrote for Gallavich. It was cathartic though!

VJ: What other Shameless characters do you enjoy, both on the show and in fics?

LJ: The first few seasons of the show were so good. I loved Lip and Fiona. I got told often that I must hate Lip based on how I write him 🤷‍♀️ but just cuz I write him as a bit of an asshole doesn’t mean I dislike him as a character! I loved writing Carl the most of all the Gallaghers, though. He’s got such a flat affect on the show, it was really fun to build on that and just make him this irreverent, unfiltered grownup with a big heart.

VJ: Lip and Fiona were the only other characters I really cared about in the early show seasons as well. Never cared about reading or writing the other siblings much, tbh. How do you feel about the Milkovich siblings? I like writing Mandy. Although I acknowledge fic Mandy can be a lot different than canon Mandy sometimes. But she's yet another character that canon did dirty, so I'm ok with giving her a better life and closer relationship to Mickey.

LJ: I do love writing Mandy. I have complicated feelings about canon Mandy that are too difficult to put into words. I wrote something pre-canon about Mandy really early into fandom just because, and I still love it even though it only has like 100 total hits, LOL. As for the other siblings, they make decent background characters but I never really invested in them. We’re not even sure who’s a cousin and who’s a brother! I’ve read some awesome fics that incorporate Iggy in fun ways, though.

VJ: Same. I never understood the Iggy thing as more than a secondary comic relief type thing.

Angst aside, what types of fics do you prefer writing, both in terms of length and content (genres, tropes, et al)?

LJ: I always say when I estimate how long a fic is going to be in the planning stage, the reality will be less than half the length. My preference across fandoms is for multi-chapters, but I like a good short one-shot too. My biggest hang-up in terms of tropes is my attachment to canon. In every fandom I’ve read or written for, I vastly prefer canon and canon-divergent to AUs, and especially for Gallavich, even had a hard time reading AUs if they didn’t suit my standards. The characters still have to feel like themselves for me to get invested— otherwise they feel like stand-ins for original fiction. The 3 AUs I wrote for Gallavich, were still deeply rooted in canon. Two of the three I would actually count as pre-canon divergent. Canon aside, there’s got to be some element of smut, even if it’s not explicit (even though I find the act of writing the smut in itself pretty torturous). Mutual pining, miscommunication. It all leads back to angst, predictably.

VJ: Lol. Fuck canonnnnnnn... AUs forevaaaa!!! I know what you mean about preserving the characterization within the different universes though. That's important to me too.

Walk us through what your writing process looks like.

LJ: Firstly, I sit on an idea for at least a week. Maybe longer. Thinking about various story plots in the shower, during work, etc, as we all probably do. When I finally open a doc it’s a jumbled mess of random lines and plot points. After that, I make myself write out a basic outline. And from there I start filling in things as they come to me, moving things around as needed. I’m not much of a multiple-drafts person, and if the words aren’t flowing the way I want them to right away, I get pretty frustrated. I also write 95% of my stories on my phone— I have a very nice laptop that only comes out when I have a large chunk of time to myself (very rare) or if I’m ready to edit. I’m a terrible editor, too. Bad autocorrects in particular are my nemesis, which is what I get for phone writing. Time permitting, I’m either going to write almost an entire chapter or one shot in 1-2 sittings, or I’m going to struggle to write three sentences over a month period. It all depends on how the muse is feeling. I’m big on not pushing myself to write when I’m not feeling it. Basically, I’m a hot mess and it’s remarkable I’ve managed to publish anything at all!

VJ: I was aghast when you told me you wrote everything on your phone. That's crazy pants to me. I did enjoy betaing for you though. You're very accepting of my edits and comments.

How much research do you typically do?

LJ: Generally, very little. Sometimes I’ll get a wild hair and NEED to know the specific street coordinates of the L train. I try to ask myself if not knowing the exact detail will pull a reader from the story. I do get jealous of fics where the author clearly has drawn from real-life experience as a barista/lawyer/world traveler. My life experience doesn’t give me much inspiration.

VJ: Interesting. Your stuff never comes off as unresearched or inauthentic. I bet you're more inspired by your own life and knowledge than you think.

LJ: I don’t know. I’ve been extremely blessed to know very little trauma or heartbreak, aside from my own struggles with depression and anxiety, which isn’t altogether uncommon. It’s probably why I’m such a canon hoe tbh. No good AUs rattling around in here.

VJ: Lol. You always talk about being all about canon, but I think you lie. You've always read and liked AUs. 😂

LJ: I do like reading AUs definitely! (Not so much writing them). It just takes me a while in each fandom. I start out with canon and canon divergent, then when I exhaust those I move onto the AUs.

And then I find myself enjoying them. Especially in its heyday, the Shameless fandom was/is blessed with many excellent authors.

VJ: Yeah, so you ease into different types of fanfic, but you never rejected AUs that I could tell.

What's your favorite Gallavich fic that you’ve written and why?

LJ: I like them all for different reasons, but I go back to The New Year series, specifically The New Year itself, the most often. Like we talked about before, there’s no love quite like your first love. It helped me make deeper connections with other fans in ways I was not anticipating. And while it might not be my best work (across fandoms) it remains the one I’m the most personally proud of.

VJ: It's a great fic! Even if a part of me hates it, because it makes me cry all the tears in my well reserve. Lmao

I'm gonna do a re-read soon. Even though I said I'd never read it again. 💀

What are some of your favorite fics and/or writers in the fandom?

LJ: This is such a difficult question because a) it’s been so long since I’ve really read Shameless fic, b) I have a really terrible memory for both fics and authors, it’s a character flaw, and c) I am the world’s worst bookmarker.

I will say that Avalonia’s fic, The Russian, is an absolute diamond that no one has read. Boomer OGs include segs, romanticalgirl, magneticdice (I unconsciously compare every other grim reaper AU I read to theirs [Company Man]). Gen X OGs: you of course, grumblesandmumbles, loftec. Millennials: biblionerd07. This is a terrible analogy.

VJ: Lol. Thank you for mentioning Biblionerd, because I forgot to mention them in mine, and Broad-Shouldered Beasts is definitely one of my picks for best written series in the fandom.

And thanks for the shout-out, babes. 💕

What are your favorite tropes as a reader?

LJ: I love miscommunication, mutual pining, enemies to lovers, friends with benefits turns into love. I’m a sucker for supernatural elements. I once told a friend from a different fandom how I found friends to lovers to be unrealistic, and she asked me how many people I knew who had fallen for someone they hated, and I was like... touché.

VJ: Lmao. I've done both IRL sorta, tbh.

How about fic pet peeves?

LJ: The first one is both obvious and a little subjective, but poor characterization will nope me out of a fic right away. Daddy kink, age difference (even if both adults), and mpreg are also not for me. Also, very specifically, fics in which the characters play Never Have I Ever or Truth or Dare.

VJ: Lmfaooooo

No party games for you? Is it too cheap a trope, you think?

LJ: Just a little too cliche maybe? Idk. Just a weird pet peeve.

VJ: Ok, let's talk about the show a little bit. What is your favorite season and episode of Shameless?

LJ: You are making me dive deep into the vault here. We already talked about how the first few seasons were the best in general. The Thanksgiving scene with Monica, with Fiona and Ian holding one another. Fiona going to prison. Lip’s freak outs every time he inevitably had to put family in front of his dreams. JAW is so great. Specifically with Gallavich, I loved Ian running to Mickey’s house for comfort and the look Mickey gives him, telling him they’ll meet at work. The scene where Mickey gets out of juvie and catches Ian behind the bleachers. The entirety of season 5 (except the ending).

VJ: Yeah, Jeremy and Emmy were always my favorite actors on the show along with Noel. Obvs, Bill Macy is great, but I just can't care about Frank 95% of the time.

Do you have a favorite Ian & Mickey scene, or is it something you mentioned above?

LJ: They’re all great for all sorts of reasons. It’s probably not a popular opinion, but I did love the earlier seasons when Mickey wasn’t quite ready to be out, but still clearly cared, was jealous, etc.

VJ: I mean, as sad and frustrating as that was, it was definitely dramatic gold. My main wish is that we had just gotten more screen time for them both.

LJ: Totally agree.

VJ: Which is actually a good segue for this... If you could go back and change one thing in canon, what would it be?

LJ: I’ve always wondered what would have happened if the back door had been locked the day Frank walked in on them. I’d also really have liked Mickey to not have gone to prison, or if he’d had to, not escaped from prison and gone to Mexico and then subsequently snitched on the cartel. That was dumb.

VJ: 😂Succinct.

Ok, the million dollar question... Do you think there's anything that could ever persuade you to write Gallavich again?

LJ: I’ll never say never, but unless I ever decide to binge the show again, I don’t think I could ever get in the headspace to write them again.

VJ: And I'm guessing you don't plan on rewatching the show after all the trauma it inflicted on us over the years? Lol

LJ: I have far too many tv shows on my to-watch list for that!

VJ: I figured. And it's understandable. But I had to ask! So now other people won't, hopefully.

Last question! Now that the show is over and done with, do you have any parting words for the fandom? Once more, with feeling.

LJ: My time in the Shameless fandom will forever be special to me. I made amazing connections and some real friends. I got to push myself creatively in ways I never thought I would do again, and it turns out I’ve got so much more left in the tank! It’s been truly unforgettable.

Thanks to everyone who’s read my works, sent me encouragement, food for thought, con-crit, cried and obsessed with me over these two dummies. Most importantly, so much love to every Gallavich and Shameless content creator who gave me hours and hours of entertainment and got me through some tough times personally. We are a small and mighty bunch. I hope we meet again in another fandom!

VJ: Awwww, I echo your sentiments. Thank you for being one of the people who gave us amazing fanworks. And on a personal level, I'm so glad we "met"!

LJ: Me too, so much!

VJ: END SCENE.

#gallavich #ian x mickey #shameless #shameless us #writer's spotlight #interview #lan-jev #lanjevinson

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hello-yue-here · 3 years

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Yuetara, zukka, and maiko

yuetara

ship

1) its not one of my main ships. i dont rlly read fanfic for them but if i see a cute fanart of them ill enjoy it and i think i first started shipping it because of good fanarts for them.

2) i like yuetara because of how similar they are. theyre both women from the water tribe. they both understand the misogyny that they have faced. and they both said f sexism im gonna be a strong woman. i also love the tui and la parallel. moon spirit and ocean spirit parallel COME ON. YUE IS THE MOON. KATARA IS THE MOST POWERFUL WATERBENDER. THEY ARE THE OCEAN AND THE MOON. the push and pull they could give eachother. that dynamic ftw.

3) i guess if i didnt like something about this ship would be the fact that if i read a fic or see a fanart w yuetara then than means in that particular au i wont get any yuekka and yuekka is probably my second favorite ship. but then again if i get yuetara than i could get a plethora of other sokka ships to go with it so my sadness disappears in like two seconds. gosh shipping is hard sometimes until you remember ‘hey i have like fifty different universes in my head. all ur ships can coexist in ur brain olivia’ other than that i really see no downsides to this ship. maybe i wish it had more content. maybe if it had more content id ship it a lot more but its not one of the more popular ships so the content is kinda few n far between on my feed.

zukka:

SHIPPP

1) my boys. my babies. my loves. i watched this show for the first time when it came out on netflix and when it ended i really didnt ship anything other than kataang. i came onto tumblr to find fun atla content and one of the very first things i saw under the atla tag was zukka content. i was like oh? whats this? zukka? interesting... i was intrigued so i found a list of fic recs and i fell in love with the ship. the rest is history. its probably my number one ship because it was my very first ship here and im nostalgic

2) oh boy there is so much i like about this ship. i relate to a shit ton of characters in atla. but sokka and zuko may be the ones i relate to most. i relate to sokka because i tend to feel second best a lot to my friends. i try to stay positive but things rarely go the way i plan or hope for them too and while im happy for my friends and their achievements i oftentimes find myself thinking why cant that be me? and i see this a lot in sokka especially in sokkas master. i dont feel special a lot and idk seeing sokka feel the same way and then realizing he is special kinda helped me realize that im special too. on the flipside i relate to zuko because i have wild anger issues and difficulty dealing w my emotions a lot as well. i get broody and short tempered and insecure very often and i tend to push people away and i refuse to ask for help (the amount of teachers and adults and therapists who have told me its okay to ask for help ur not any weaker because of it is astounding. do i listen to them? .....im working on it.) and i saw a shit ton of this in zuko. book one and two zuko rarely asks for help as seen in the blue spirit and zuko alone and he pushes away uncle so many times and even when the gaang iffers to help him in i think its the chase he tells them to leave. when he finally has his redemption and joins the gaang and lets them kinda become a better person i was so happy. i want that for myself yk. seeing him finally win the agni kai and overcome his family that always told him he was nothing was such a win. my sister and i get along but when we were children we were very much like zuko and azula. it was extremely competitive all the time and there was so much toxicity and sibling drama to a concerning extent. we get along great now which im very happy about but yeah their sibling relationship hit a lil too on the nose for me. seeing as i relate to these character so much and want them ti be happy i want to live vicariously through them so seeing them together is amazing for me to project into them. i love projecting onto fictional characters and with them i can project onto BOTH so its a winwin. plus so many zukka fics are so well written and heartwarming and heartbreaking and emotional and fluffy anf UGH the talent here us astounding.

3) what do i not like about the ship? again the list is long. oops. mainly the toxic shippers. there are so many toxic zukka stans that sometimes make it hard for me to enjoy this ship but hey! thats what the block button is for:) i despise how often people infantilize zuko and completely ruin his character for the sake of making him a soft weak lil boy who needs protecting. thats just not zuko for me. and ive seen many many accounts even state that this kind of portrayal of zuko is rooted in racist stereotypes about asian men (now i am white so i personally have never experiences racism but i feel the need to bring that up because it is wrong and attention needs to be brought to it because a lot of poc fans have criticised this) and the same for sokka. some ppl rlly skew his character and make him a big strong brute and hypermasculine and once again poc fans have said that this take is rooted in racist stereotypes. again! these are just my opinions! this is my favorite ship! but i think its important to acknowledge some of the bad parts of our ships as well and be critical where criticism is needed :))

maiko

ship

1) I LOVE MAIKO. “i dont hate you” “i dont hate you too” BRUH. my little heart just burst into flames. im sorry guys but maiko is so cute. they hate everything except eachother. BRUH that is one of the cutest tropes. i shipped them the moment i saw them together onscreen and i was so happy when zukos face lit up in the finale when mai came back.

2) “i hate everything but i have a soft spot for you” TAKE MY MONEY I AM A SUCKER FOR THIS. they are so cute together. like zuko is rarely happy in a majority of atla but mai makes him happy and i- 🥺🥺 HE DESERVES IT. and mai is always so supportive of him. when hes stressing out about the war meeting she tries her best to comfort him. and zuko cares about her too. he may not be the best at showing it but oh my god hes TRYING HIS BEST. i think its a very accurate portrayal of teenage relationships because they arent perfect and they do fight but like,, every teenage relationship does that. and even after everything and how he left her in the fire nation she still had his back at boiling rock. she still risked her life against azula to save his butt.

3) the thing i hate about maiko isnt even about maiko. its about antis who think mai is toxic and that zuko deserves better. that has got to be the worst take ive ever heard. they had a fight in ember island. that is NORMAL. they are teenagers. they are not perfect. but underneath all the rough edges and things they need to work out they still care about eachother so freaking much. i genuinelt believe that neither of them would do anything to intentionally hurt the other and i think thats what matters the most. if anything mai is the best girlfriend in the entire world because zuko fucked up like,, quite a few times. he got rlly jealous and dumped her thru a letter and ppl always say that mai was toxic for being mad at him for those two things. umm she had every right to be mad at him for both of those. and while zuko is allowed to feel his emotions and be angry sometimes as well sometimes he needs to think things thru and realize that hey maybe some if this jealousy is unfounded. BUT EVEN THEN. HE RESPECTED HER FEELINGS AND DIDNT TOUCH HER WHEN SHE SAID DONT TOUCH ME. HE RESPECTED HER. so i hate toxic maiko takes because they are literally so wrong in my opinion.

again all of these are just my opinions!! feel free to agree or disagree but please be respectful!! i will respect whatever u think as well because this is all just for fun :)

#atla #avatar the last airbender #zukka #yuetara #maiko #ship game #ask game #long post #wow i wrote a lot #also if anyone wants to talk ships feel free to message me!

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thelogicalghost · 3 years

Text

I finally watched all of "The Librarians" and I have three important spoilery thoughts

1. I think overall the single most problematic issue for the show was that, because Flynn was always The Ultimate Protagonist, none of the Librarian trio ever had a truly satisfying character arc. They had good individual episodes, but suffered from lack of consistency and growth, especially in comparison to Flynn.

2. Jenkins is the most precious baby and I like how the writers realized that and gave him more time and attention as the show developed, until he actually got just as much of an arc as any of the trio, although see point 3.

3. I'm torn about the final two episodes.

On the one hand, S4 was filled with some of the strongest writing and most emotional moments. I honestly really liked the idea of questioning the morality of the Library as an institution that, at its heart, cares more about its mission than the many lives that have come and gone over its existence. Giving Jenkins as the immortal unchanging knight an unwavering prejudice made him feel real and complex. I was absolutely fascinated by the idea that someone who felt betrayed by the Library would try to come up with systems of safeguarding artifacts without relying on the Library. I really wish they'd tied it together better with the other big questioning of conventions, the issue of multiple Librarians. Jenkin's dealing with mortality was a great arc. I was psyched about Flynn leaving permanently and finally letting Eve and the Trio have center stage. I screamed at Jenkin's death but it felt real and earned and it was great writing. So to have all of that taken away, to have everything revealed as a revenge scheme and have Flynn and Eve save the day and fix it all, felt oddly disappointing.

On the other hand, I spend so much time criticizing shows for trying to be dark and full of death, and this is most definitely a light show. In general, I enjoy getting to eat my happy ending cake even when it's only possible because of BS "and then it was all fixed with magic and/or advanced technology." It's been a shitty ... uh, decade? Whatever. So I don't want to be hypocritical about lasting consequences in my escapist fiction.

IDK, maybe if they hadn't rewound so much? Did we really need to erase all of S4? Maybe if Nicole had a better motivation I wouldn't have been so irked by her villain twist?

The moment that keeps coming back to me is the moment when they find Flynn's tethering ring and everyone immediately goes, "well, clearly he resigned and left from his own free will." I mean, yeah, the dude runs off a lot, but he always finds some way of explaining himself, either in person or in a note. Also, while he was clearly getting a bit cold-feet about the whole immortality tethering thing, his relationship with Eve had never been stronger, so leaving her felt way too abrupt. I literally said out loud during the scene, "but how do you know that he wasn't kidnapped or lured away or something?" But in the next episode everyone seems to take for granted that Flynn gone + ring left behind = he's resigned for good. But THEN, a few episodes later, it's all, TWIST! HE WAS KIDNAPPED! ........ well yes? okay? so why didn't that possibility occur to any of these geniuses who seem super suspicious and investigate-y all the other times people needed rescuing? And I feel like that moment is such a great indicator of how the show can be so bizarrely inconsistent about its characters and their arcs.

#the librarians #spoilers #flynn carsen #reactions

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annetteblog · 3 years

Text

I got a very long ask and wrote even longer reply, and now Tumblr for some reason doesn't want to publish it through asks. So I'm making a separate post, because what else can I do? 😀 I hope Anon wouldn't mind

Hi!

Thank you for such a long ask! I really enjoy replying those, although it may take some time to actually write whatever I have on my mind 🙂 However, I feel like for every question that you posed, it's possible to write its own big reply or even an essay, so this piece of mine probably won’t give them justice (but I’ll try my best.)

As usual, one big IMO.

1) Ethics, “gueer coding” and discussions

I believe I’ve already partly touched this subject here. Shortly, I think that everything the boys did (and still do) had its own purpose. They decided to put these "undertones" (or whatever one may call them) in their art. They made some statements with a very small room for interpretation. And it didn't happen once or twice. More like, it's been a consistent behaviour throughout years.

I don't buy this excuse some fans write - "oh, he just didn't know about this/didn't understand how it looked like/didn't..." So apparently, JK wasn't able to figure out shit about Troye, didn't give a damn about his GCF, didn't think how his tattoo looked like; JM didn't realize to what conclusions could lead his quite bold words about 4am or waking up and seeing JK; both of them didn't have second thoughts about the Black Swan dance; Bang PD is just a CEO who pays zero attention to BTS in general and KM actions in particular (which sometimes actually backlash, e.g. that stop gay fanservice thing after the Seoul concerts), because he clearly just doesn't care AT ALL; whatever PR service they have in BH is just asleep all the time... Etc etc etc, you got the idea

Well, if one wants to perceive JM, JK and BigHit as a group of complete morons with no brains, this "oh, they just didn't know" explanation may work. But if all of them were idiots, how would BTS become the biggest group on a planet? They are smart enough, deal with this.

And YET. KM still do what they do. It's their choice, so apparently they have their motives. You wrote it yourself too - "Jikook and BH put out all that stuff for a reason."

Keeping this in mind, I truly think it's fair to discuss queer undertones or KM's bond. It's meant to be discussed and speculated. They made it public, and they continue to make it public (and quite obvious, to be honest). Why? Well, I guess they want us to speculate.

From here comes the second point

2) Art and its interpretations

In general, I believe that any good art should allow various interpretations. That's what a good piece of art is supposed to do - provoke a thought. As well as it's quite customary to analyze and (sometimes) overanalyze art. Thousands of universities worldwide have programs which are focused on fine art, literature, theater, music, film, etc.

And why is it okay to write about Avengers or Madonna or whatever weird art you're able to find in the closest Contemporary museum (like a banana taped to a wall), but not okay to interpret BTS' songs and/or performances? Again, I strongly believe that art is meant to be discussed. Especially as cool as theirs 🙂

Actually, some popular fandom theories turned out to be true here. Since Spring Day release on Feb 2017, fans speculated about its connection to the Sewol ferry tragedy based on the song's lyrics, MV and choreo. We got this confirmation like when, December 2020? But before it was also just an interpretation.

Coming back to KM. Combining these with the idea that JM/JK/BH clearly know what they're doing and how it may look like, I don't see a problem in having various interpretation of their art. Including queer ones.

3) Escapism

Isn't all art targeted to escaping in a sense? We want to take a break from reality and/or mundane life or just gain some new experience. In this sense what's the radical difference between staring at pictures or sculptures in a museum, watching a movie, reading a book or scrolling through Tumblr reading BTS/KM centric posts? All of these are means to escape and entertain ourselves.

As for this "if they are a queer couple, is it okay to derive pleasure and 'what a beautiful love story' feelings from two members of systematically oppressed minority?" - and you would prefer doing what - ignoring them? pretending that they don't exist? 🙃 In case if they are a queer couple, I guess showing support and benevolence is even more important. Exactly because, as you mentioned, they are a part of the oppressed minority. And the hatred is/would be definitely in place.

4) Fanfiction

Oh my, what a controversial theme these days.

Firstly, some forget it was not invented in the 21st century. Even slash fanfiction (cough Star cough Trek). As for incorporating real people, it's been a part of literature for like what.. always? There are millions of different writings about emperors, nobles, military figures, lives of saints, etc. And it's not like personal opinion of people in question bothered those, who write or wrote about them. I clearly remember a scene in Leo Tolstoy's War and Peace, where Alexander I [Russian emperor 1801-25] after losing a battle against Napoleon, hits a birch tree with his sword while crying hard and just being kinda hysterical. Would real Alexander be satisfied with such image if he read the book? Idk 😄

About having "the right to comment on such [different from your own] experience". I suppose, if authors wrote only about what they had experienced, our literature would be 95% poorer than it is. How can one write books in historic settings if they didn't live there? How do books about future and space travel exist, if we live in 2021? Is it needed to be a part of mafia to write about mafia? What about other cultures? Should an American author write only about American people and American lifestyle or it's fine to have characters from other countries?

Writing is not about experiencing something and then making a fanfic or a book, it's more about research and compassion. If you have reliable info on your theme and are able to look at the world using different lenses, why not?

I don't perceive fanfiction as a worldwide evil. Sure, there are creepy examples as well as authors, who write fetishizing weird shit. But it doesn't mean that all fanfiction=bad and all slash fanfiction=objectification of male homosexuality. Fanfiction is just one form of fiction, it can be good or bad based on how it's written. But the label itself doesn't define anything, as well as reading it should not be a reason to accusations.

5) Jikook, shipping and politics

I'm among those, who perceive pretty much everything as a part of politics. We all exist within some political conventions and have certain political laws over our heads. And yes, it includes art. Even if an artist says something like "oh, I decided to stay away from politics, my work is beyond it". The decision to stay away from politics is also political, because apparently there was something within the political structure what made this artist say that and forced them to make this distinction between them and some institutional conventions.

And that makes me believe that shipping/supporting KM is also political. But I don't think it's necessarily bad? Basically, you decided to support potentially queer people from a country, which doesn't really approve LGBTQ+. It puts you in the opposition towards a particular government. You made a choice. You could google some SK stuff, read all that you mentioned in the beginning of your ask, and say something like "oh, that's not okay there? well, fair enough, I guess their government knows better"🤠 and forget that this KM thing even exists. But apparently you didn't

Imo, is it politics? Yes

Is it bad that it's politics? Well, no? 🙃

P.S. I hope I was clear enough with my ideas. Thank you again for the thought provoking ask, and I hope I'll hear from you again 🙂

And honestly, I don't think that you're problematic in any way :)

#annetteasks #jikook #kookmin #long post #jeon jungkook #park jimin #jimin #jungkook

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krosaceae · 3 years

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💖, 😐, ✏️, 👖 , 🍰!

Ah thank you for indulging me :) I'm excited to answer these bad boys. So we have:

💖 What do you like most about your own writing?

😐 What embarrasses you most about your own writing?

✏️ Do you write every day?

👖 Are you a planner, plantser, or pantser? Is it consistent?

🍰 Name one of your fave comfort fics (doesn’t have to be your all time fave).

I will answer below the cut because I write way too much :)

💖 What do you like most about your own writing?

Damn, kinda wish I was answering this while having one of my god-complex moments... but either way lmao I like that I don't give a fuck in a lot of regards. Like, I write to give my writing its own unique voice, not to necessarily follow writing rules... if that makes sense? If I'm going to toot my own horn, I also think I can be pretty funny and I have my moments of being clever. I also like my dialogue but only after I've spent at least an entire week agonizing over it.

😐 What embarrasses you most about your own writing?

God, where do I even start lol. All of it? I'm really bad at spelling lmao. I always have been. It's definitely super embarrassing when spellcheck or my beta can't even read what I'm trying to say, but I'm getting better. Sometimes I also get embarrassed at the amount of cursing I write into my fic lolz. Like, I delete so many fucks before we get to a chapter worth posting, if you can believe that. I also think I can be a little cliche and redundant, but also I don't really give a fuck because it's fanfiction--of course, it's going to be a little cliche.

Okay, wait. I thought about it more. Probably the most embarrassing part of my writing right now is how personal some of the shit is to me. Like putting my own struggles with sobriety and mental health out there by projecting them onto fictional characters (my fave coping mechanism lol) and then having people comment on said struggles, its embarrassing as fuck. Especially when somebody comments and calls a character on their shit, and the shit is something I used to do or maybe even still do, sometimes it makes me want to self-destruct from embarrassment. But also it's helpful for me, so idk. I think that teaching teenagers has helped me learn how to embrace the embarrassment and use it to my advantage to like... grow and shit, y'know?

✏️ Do you write every day?

During the summer, especially yes. And during the school year, I definitely try, and my definition of writing is very loose and inclusive because of that. If I open the document and like add at least one word, I have written. And maybe you disagree with me, but it makes writing accessible to me and gets rid of a lot of the guilt I feel about writing 'enough'.

Something is always better than nothing and ‘something’ is not 'half-assing' it, are both things I constantly remind myself about writing.

👖 Are you a planner, plantser, or pantser? Is it consistent?

I love this question hehe. I'm somewhere in the middle. When I first started re-writing Barriers from its original 2013 shitshow, I kinda just went full fucking pantser trying to edit the original chapters without any clear vision of where I was going other than the hazy goal I had as a fucking 16-year-old lmao. This was about a year ago, like end of summer before I started posting on AO3.

Then as the school year started approaching and I was planning my curriculum for the year... I was like wait a damn minute, why don't I use the same backward planning I use to teach, in my writing? So I spent a few days compiling a super sloppy (kind of chronological) list of what I wanted to happen in the fic and how I wanted it to end. Then I sat down and hammered out a neat(er) outline of the entire fic, starting from the end. It's not a super detailed outline, but it helps me think about what needs to happen in order to get the ending I want. I never thought teaching would help me with fic writing, but here we are lmao.

So then the points in the outline help me write chapters, but from there I kinda let the characters do them lol. Of course, I always have like a chapter goal and a basic outline (backward planned of course~) on the top of the page, but sometimes I have a scene in my head that needs to get on that fucking page and I'll do that before I even get an outline down. I also have an entire Google doc of Random Scenes that don’t have a chapter home yet, so sometimes I dump those kinds of Need To Be Written ASAP type drabbles there and then plop them into the outlined chapter when ready. I’m not sure if that made any actual sense lmao but moving on

So if I’m writing and shit gets so off the rails that it doesn't exactly follow the outline anymore, I'll go back to the outline and reevaluate. If it fits and I prefer what I’ve written to the outline, I can change it. I don't like to think of my outline as like a set in stone type of deal, more so a dynamic guide document that might shift with the story as it's written. Which is okay :)

So long answer short: Big planner girl with occasional pantser tendencies lmao.

🍰 Name one of your fave comfort fics (doesn’t have to be your all time fave).

I may or may not be the most predictable bitch ever... but @modern-tsunamis wrote Long Story Short (the world's cutest fkin Graire oneshot) for me as a gift in the Bokumono Winter exchange this year, and I shit you not I read it more than I'd like to publicly admit lmao. Its just such an easy, relaxing read that makes me feel. So like... if you haven't read it, do it!!!

Thanks again for the asks @dougs-inn!! These were a blast to answer :)

#fanfic asks #asks #dougs-inn #did i procrastinate by answering these instead of updating barriers?#yes #yes i did #barriers

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dancingstarsbornfromchaos · 3 years

Note

4. What is/are your favorite trope(s)? 5. What is/are your least favorite trope(s)?

Shipping Asks

4. What is/are your favorite trope(s)?

Oh gee. I have a quite a few tropes that I really enjoy when it comes to ships. I guess they can all be considered more or less “popular” ones in general too, but hey. It’s good shit, so it deserves to be popular, if you ask me.

I’ll list a few and spend just two words on each of them, because otherwise this answer would turn in a novel. Alphabetically:

Enemies to Lovers: This sums up a lot of my ships, tbh. I thrive in seeing the contrast between two characters and all the feelings and situations that can come into play starting from that. There’s a lot of potential for angst, character study and introspection, relationship development, and it leaves that bittersweet taste on your tongue that it’s just my jam. I could put the Hero/Villain ship trope in this category too.

Fake Dating (that then turns into the real shit): I always find stories that involve fake relationships funny, especially if then an unexpected spark happens and makes it all awkward. This is one of my go-to when I’m looking for some humour.

First Kiss: At the cost of sounding cheesy as hell, I’m weak for first kiss stories. Aside from the variety of situations that can contain this, I enjoy it because it’s usually the culmination of something bigger that unravelled before, so I particularly like the build-up to the kiss, more than the kiss scene in itself. The Love Confession trope fits right next to this one.

Mutual Pining: This is one of the things I’ll never get tired of. I like seeing a relationship being built way more than an established one and the pining is an essential phase in my eyes xD

Power Couple: At times I just love seeing two characters that are badass on their own and even more badass together, you know?

Rivals Team-up: This one has a similar appeal to the “Enemies to Lovers” one for me, but with a more humourous twist.

Sex Pollen, Aliens (or who else for them) Made Them Do It, Fuck or Die & Co: I’m not huge on smut, but these are some situations that can turn really interesting when handled right. There can be a lot of really good shit built around the sex scene itself, both concerning what leads to it and, even more, the aftermath (which is often left untold and that’s a real pity because it’s a total waste of potential!). Of course, the scene in itself can offer you a lot in terms of feeling and introspection too, and that’s something I like to explore.

Soulmates AU: There are just so many cool ideas in this category! Some are funny, some are heartbreaking and there’s every shade in-between. I find this trope very inspiring in its complexity and in all the openings it offers. It’s a multiverse in itself.

The Matchmaker: Again, the humour of this idea really gets me. Moreover, I love the idea of having one character who’s forced to deal with all the others’ crap, as some sort of unofficial therapist. Idk, maybe it’s because, in way, we shippers are like the Matchmaker in a story, but I always connect with whoever is in this role in a story xD

Specialy mention: Found Family. It’s not a strictly shippy trope, but it’s perhaps my number one fave.

5. What is/are your least favorite trope(s)?

The list here it’s shorter bcause I have quite a few tropes I enjoy, a lot that I can take or leave and few I don’t like.

Most of the tropes I don’t like are “daily life AUs” (like Coffee Shop AU, High School AU, etc). I guess I’ve read enough of them that they have stopped being original, so I get bored pretty quickly with them (of course there are exceptions, but they are rare).

The whole “Girls like Bad Boys (or vice versa or with genders mixed up)” thing is also something I’m not too fond off. It’s become too clichéd and the characters end up being so stereotyped that it makes me wanna roll my eyes.

I’m a bit iffy about the whole Major Character Death trope. As much as I love angst, I want my fiction to have a happy ending or at least a hopeful one. We already get enough bad ending IRL, so I want my fantasy worlds to skip them, when possible. It’s the same reason why I’m not extremely fond of Unrequited Love (between the characters that make up the ship, I mean) that never becomes requited.

Also, I never understood what is the big deal about heigh difference. It’s not that I dislike it or anything, but...I just don’t get it??

#answered asks #scotty speaks #scotty answers #paradiseturnedhell #[ OMG MISS T ]#[ I'm still shook here ]

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afoolforatook · 3 years

Text

On fandom and tragic romance tropes, from someone who's lived it.

Okay, this is kind of…. Idk a very specific vent and tbh one I feel kinda bad about because I genuinely don’t want to make people feel bad for liking reading/writing romantic angst or tragedy and it’s really less of an individual issue than an overall attitude in fandom.

Like, it’s absolutely okay to like not happy endings, and angst doesn’t have to just be for cathartic relief. Angst isn’t only acceptable if it’s to process trauma, you’re allowed to like it just because that’s your taste.

But at the same time…. I can’t help but have very personal feelings about how a lot of fandom spaces treat tragic romance tropes…

(this got really long but... it's something I've wanted to address for a long time)

I'm far from secretive with the fact that when I was 20, my girlfriend Emma (19) was killed in a car crash, along with her younger brother, mother, and aunt, and that a lot of my art and writing is purposefully about processing and accepting that grief. Fandom has been a very important part of how I’ve gotten through the last five years, which I’ll get into a bit more in a minute, but tbh it’s also been a lot harder navigating fandom and especially anything ship-related since Emma died, because of how people tend to romanticize a character tragically losing a partner.

And honestly, it’s not just fandom, it’s media in general. And mainstream media focus on tragic sob stories, shock factor, and BYG tropes is definitely a big part of the problem.

But as much as fandom pushes against mainstream overuse of such tropes, there is a good portion of fandom that falls into the same type of issue. And not just ‘fandom’ in the usual sense, but literary communities, poetry, etc…

The amount of times I see stories or prompts about characters tragically losing their partner, and that being the climax of the story, and then next to nothing about that character actually navigating their grief or being able to eventually start a new relationship or just be happy is just…. It makes me feel physically ill.

Like, people saying how tragic love stories are more interesting than happy endings. Or seeing a post about tragic pairing prompts and people saying things like ‘or they think it's unrequited but then A dies and B finds a letter confessing and they really loved each other but now it's too late’ and more people being like ‘YES YOU GET IT THAT'S THE GOOD STUFF’

Just… really, honestly. It's okay to like angst, even really tragic angst. I’m not trying to guilt anyone out of that.

I just….. Most of the time people just talk about it like ‘oh yeah I love some of that good tragic love story shit’ and the stories focus on the build-up and the shock/trauma of the death as it happens and then the excruciating reaction of the survivor and then maybe a time jump to show them happy again.

But very rarely do people take the time to actually handle the grief. People like the good cry of a character mourning their partner, but the vast majority of creators and fans rush through or skip over everything after the initial drama and aftermath. The ‘tragedy’ is the only part they focus on, and then the story ends and they move on.

And like. Shit. I liked that stuff too, I wrote some of it, years ago. And I’m not saying you can’t ever just leave it there, or that if you want to write tragic romance you always have to explore all the long-term emotional consequences.

But try to have it in mind, to consider what message countless grief narratives that end after the funeral, or maybe a few weeks or months later, teach people about real-life grief. This goes for any kind of grief narrative, but the one I see most, the one I used to ‘enjoy’ most myself, is romantic.

But, after having actually lived it? And knowing I'll have to live the rest of my life as the part of the story that usually isn’t told? It turns my stomach the way it’s often handled.

Like seeing people gush about how angsty a fic/idea is, and ‘OH MY GOD SO SAD CAN YOU BELIEVE HOW TRAGIC HOW DARE YOU. I LOVE SEEING/PUTTING THEM THROUGH SO MUCH PAIN’ gets a bit uncomfortable.

Not because there’s something inherently wrong with ever reacting like that, but because most often I can turn around and have the same people not know how to react when I tell them about Emma, not know how to handle the same grief they were just gushing over in fiction, when it’s real.

Grief is isolating enough on its own, but then it just doesn’t feel great when the worst thing to ever happen to you is a huge trope that people gush over, while very rarely fleshing out the actual reality of what it feels like to go through that or how to respond to someone actually dealing with grief, and eventually having to deal with your own grief.

Tbh it’s why I really just kinda have an aversion to the word ‘angst’ in general, and don’t really like to refer to my own writing as angst, even though I know plenty of people might think of it as such. So much of fandom's handling of ‘angst’ has come to feel like voyeuristic tourism of the grief I deal with every day, and will for the rest of my life.

Just, I know people are always going to like tragic angsty romance, and that’s fine, and honestly, it's not even an issue of individuals, but of how fandom in general treats it.

And again, I really don’t want to make anyone feel bad for liking it, and it has its purposes. And even when it’s not for catharsis, it's okay to just like sad stories just because.

I just… I wish more people would keep in mind that it’s not just a tearjerker story trope. People really go through this. And they then often end up feeling very isolated because people around them don't know how to react to their grief, because their grief makes things awkward and a mood killer.

Like, if you love this kind of angst (and not because you personally relate to it or find it cathartic, but just because, just for fun) but then feel awkward around people talking about their real-life grief, maybe spend some time with that, and think about the topic as a real-world trauma and not just a dramatic story trope. (this doesn’t just go for grief. Any kind of trauma you don’t personally deal with, if you love reading/writing it but avoid actually listening to people talking about their real-life experiences with it, think about why that is.)

I just hate seeing loss and initial dramatic grief responses being this shock factor/tearjerker trope, without ever really seriously addressing long-term grief. Especially when it doesn't even do a time jump or anything, and just ends on the surviving character being forever destroyed; when it focuses on the idea of how sad it is for your favorite character to have to spend the rest of their life alone.

And that’s not even folding in any kind of BYG/queer tragedy tropes in canon or fandom spaces.

And like… on a much more individual, less practical point, I just… there’s nothing wrong with angst but honestly (and especially for characters whose canon is in no way tragic) every time I see it I just want to scream WHY…. Why do that to them!? I’m not saying you have to stop, or that you’re not allowed to write trauma you don’t deal with personally. But I will never not cringe a bit at the ‘painful enjoyment’ of a character going through the traumatic loss of a partner. And it’s a sentiment I don’t really see people being okay with in regards to any other kind of trauma.

I don’t have actual numbers, but it sure feels like fandom treats stories about romantic grief very differently than most other traumas. Other trauma, even other kinds of grief, like a close friend or a sibling or parent, etc. tend to at least try to touch on a theme of recovery, or that the emotional turmoil being covered isn’t just a fun angsty trope to spend a little time in and then move on. And of course, this isn’t universal and plenty of people don’t handle these other traumas respectfully or as anything more than dramatic fuel, but this is the trend I’ve personally seen in over 10 years of tumblr fandom. And to that point, even when traumas aren’t respectfully handled I’ve at least seen people try to bring attention to that, with posts about how to respectfully handle disability or addiction or mental health or abuse. I can’t remember off the top of my head a single post like that about grief, let alone specifically romantic grief. It seems to be commonly accepted that while most kinds of trauma can be explored, but still handled respectfully, the death of a partner can just be done for the Drama. People tend to try to learn about abuse or addiction experiences before attempting big angsty stories addressing that. But doomed romance and a grief-stricken lover (it feels like, in my experience) are much more likely to happen on a whim.

Generally, it feels like other kinds of trauma, while still part of ‘angst’ also keeps a sense of awareness of how that narrative reflects real people’s experiences. It’s not just heavy because it’s big dramatic fictional angst, but because it’s grounded in real-life trauma that everyday people who come across it might relate to. Like... I just feel like a lot of fandom spaces treat ‘major character death’ and tragic romantic trope tags as just filters, like they’re needed because ‘not everyone likes angst, it’s just not their thing’ without really acknowledging that it’s a real trauma that everyday people deal with, where (again, often, but of course far from always, and certainly not in mainstream) other tws and tags like assault or substance abuse, people understand that people they interact with might really deal with those issues and they try to not just use them as dramatic fodder and to portray them respectfully.

But grief, especially romantic grief, seems different. The number of people who will come across a fic or edit or piece of art about a tragic love story, and will have had that personal experience of losing a partner, is much lower than people with real experiences with abuse, or addiction, or mental illness. That’s not a bad thing. I wish none of you ever have to know what that feels like.

But because of that, tragic romance ends up seeming like this distant thing. Like it’s only in dramatic tv shows or movies or literature, or lives solely in angsty fandom spaces as a way to get out a good cry. It seems grand and Tragic, off in its own world of dramatic emotional story tropes.

It’s solely pretty dark edits put to song lyrics, or striking art, or beautifully written prose that rips your heart out. It’s Tragic Romance.

And there’s nothing wrong with that inherently. But for many people, it seems like that is what it becomes: fiction. An angsty trope.

I genuinely hope that’s all it ever is for all of you. I wish I could ensure that that good angsty hurt will only ever be a trope you visit when you need a good cry.

But it’s not just fiction.

It's not just angst for sake of drama or fun or poetic storytelling. It’s not grand or romantic or beautifully tragic.

It’s unbearable. It’s physical pain.

That’s not exaggeration or metaphor. It sneaks up on me out of nowhere and it literally feels like someone is crushing my chest. I’ve nearly broken my hand punching a wall because I needed to make something hurt more than this thing in my chest that isn’t even actually there but it hurts so much.

Tbf I think a lot of my attitude towards this really stems more from fandom trends from when I was younger, and I think a lot more people actually try to flesh out grief more these days. But I just remember so much tragic romantic fic and fandom love from when I was a teenager that didn’t go deeper than ‘look how heartbreaking this is it’s so sad, I wanna make everybody read it and cry and it’s just fun and a story, oh my god I couldn't live with that’

no, of course I don't have a few specific old fics or posts from like superwholock days in mind, that I used to gush over too, and now just the idea of makes me feel actually sick

Idk… like I said. I don't at all want to make anyone feel bad for liking that type of angst, and I feel kind of bad for criticizing it. It just…

It hurts seeing basically your exact situation on angsty prompt lists with people gushing about how good it hurts. Especially when the same people would be (and have been) deer in headlights when they find out you’ve lived the same thing. (Again, this goes for any kind of trauma trope, but most others I’ve seen at least some kind of discussion about before)

Just please, try to be mindful of not just how you write stories about grief, but how you talk about death angst in general. (again, certainly not everyone, but more and more) People know to not just romanticize abuse trauma or addictions or mental illness, and to research, and ask for advice to try to be respectful.

And it’s much more common for someone in fandom spaces, in their teens or 20s or 30s to deal with those sorts of trauma than having experienced losing a partner.

But we exist. And while there is plenty of media out there showing tragic young romance, there is very little (in my experience, after nearly five years of desperately looking) real-world acknowledgment and support, or proof that you’ll be able to survive that kind of loss and still be happy, and even less so if they’re queer.

In a couple of months, it will have been five years since Emma’s death. From day one I have not been private about my loss, whenever possible.

And in five years of saying “When I was 20 my girlfriend died.” to new friends, classmates, potential dates, fandom spaces, therapists, grief support forums, etc… do you know how many other people have told me that they also lost a partner as a young adult, whether queer or straight, by accident or suicide or illness?

Zero.

No one. I’ve had people say how they lost a best friend or a sibling or a parent. And those losses, those kinds of grief are certainly not any less traumatic than the loss of a partner. But even in real life, they’re different. Losing a partner, especially at a very young age when it’s likely your main romantic experience, has different emotional effects, and can be harder to find people who directly relate.

Five years. Zero people dealing with the specific facets of grief as me.

The ONLY times I have ever heard about stories like mine in real life are either the rare article or essay or celebrity story, of which I can probably easily count on two hands.

All the other representation I’ve found is in mainstream fiction and fandom.

And of those stories, those fics, that art, the vast majority have had the partner die in the last half, probably closer to the 75% mark, of the story or arc.

If I’m lucky, that last 25% will focus on the immediate aftermath and grief (especially in fic, while a lot of media might give you a few scenes, and then move on to other character arcs).

If I’m really lucky they’ll show some kind of time jump, to say ‘see, they’re still haunted by their lost love but they’ve tried to move on or can pretend to be happy’.

And so much fandom reception is centered around ‘it’s soooooo SADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD MY POOR HEART IT HURTS SO GOOD. LOVE ME SOME ANGST’, or romanticizing the idea of being unable to live without them, and if they can, it’s often never really putting focus on all the pain it took to process their grief.

Again, I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with this individually, or that you shouldn’t gush and scream over fic or art or prompts that hook you because of angst. But it adds up really quickly, especially when, even when getting good genuine support from people, you still see no one else actually living with that feeling like you. The only place you find it is stories, and then you see people mostly excited over just how beautifully sad it is.

And that just feels… I can’t explain it honestly.

Just, think about how you react to or talk about fic or prompts or art about a character crying over their partner’s body, or attending their funeral, and think about whether you’d feel appropriate doing the same if instead, they were dealing with abuse, or addiction, or self-harm.

Again, that’s not to say you can’t ever gush or key smash or such, but is it all you do?

You don’t have to stop enjoying angst and tragic romance. But think about how I just said that.

Enjoy.

Do you only ever act like you ‘Enjoy’ it (and yes, this includes the ‘I’m such a masochist I just love to cry over them, it’s emotional release that doesn’t trigger me’ reaction), and romanticize it?

It’s fine to, sometimes. But do you also appreciate it, and try to understand the real-world weight of it? Do you know what you’d say to a friend if they told you they’d lost a partner?

That ‘love me some good angst’, Dramatic grief, being the main fandom attitude doesn’t just hurt me or others who have lost people close to them, partners or not.

A big part of fandom, and of just society, has no idea how to deal with grief, their own or others. It’s not a light conversation topic, it makes people feel awkward, or walk on eggshells around you, or tell you how they can’t possibly imagine having to go through that (btw, y'all don’t say this to people. About grief, or trauma, or disability or anything like that, just don’t. I’m begging you. And a rant about that kind of thing is for another day but... )

And then, when people inevitably face some form of major grief themselves, they feel ashamed for not handling it ‘right’.

It hurts, to try to find some acknowledgment of your grief, and only ever see stories that show just the first few weeks or months; the feeling of it never possibly being anything but constantly excruciating. Stories that end on ‘they were alone and sad and that is what their story, their love, will live on as; Tragic’. Or, that skip all the work and the doubt and the backsliding, and just show years down the road, when they’ve got a whole new life, and that grief, that love, is just a sad memory that they have ‘moved on’ from. Just a tiny trinket call back.

It feels impossible to survive, to ever be happy again, when you never see grief being treated as more than a tragic story point. And then, as you try your hardest to keep going, to process and heal, and connect to new people, while not forgetting the person you love, not letting them just become your tragic backstory, you see people gush over tragic love stories, over how romantic it is, over how characters loved each other so much they couldn’t live without them. (Thankfully a good bit of fandom seems to be pulling away from this, but it’s still common)

And, if that’s what it is to lose a partner, your soulmate… then… then how am I able to keep living? Even as painful as it is? If true love means not being able to live without the other person, does that mean I didn’t, I don’t, actually love them enough? Am I selfish for still actually wanting to live the rest of my life, even with this pain of the person I love being gone?

Would people read my, our, story and ‘enjoy’ it? Would they find this romantic? Would they scream over a prompt based on the worst event in my life, and have a good cry, and then move on, thinking how sad and beautifully tragically romantic that story would be? Would this person I love and miss more than anything, become just a Tragedy? Just an angsty sob story to gush about how wonderfully painful it was? Would it become about only my pain and heartbreak, and not about the cruelty of this other complete, unique, independent person who was robbed of their entire future?

Maybe that seems melodramatic or putting too much weight on tropes, or fandom. But remember.

Five years.

Zero real people saying ‘I’ve been there too’.

The only places I have seen my grief reflected (beyond a rare celebrity interview, or article) is in fiction, and mostly in fandom.

For over a decade I’ve seen people key smash and gush over angsty ships in fic and art, and I was one of them for a long time.

And then, when it became real life for me, all too often (not always, of course) people wouldn’t know how to handle my real grief. Even when I didn’t want to grieve, but wanted to remember all the reasons I love Emma. My real-life moments of ‘fluff’ that I cling to, become uncomfortable when they know the ‘angst’ to come.

And I don’t blame them. I’m not angry at them for not knowing what to say, for walking on eggshells. They’re not cruel for that, they’re not unsympathetic, it’s not that they just don’t try.

Because, if I’ve found so few real-world stories about this kind of grief, after looking so hard for so long, how can I expect them to have had much more luck?

If the only places I find stories about grief never focus on the reality of life after the funeral, and the process of not moving past, but learning to handle grief, then how can I expect broader fandom to know how to be comfortable around the ugly, boring, repetitive, not at all romantic parts of that grief?

Just, yes. Write, read, love your angst. But please just remember that ‘tragic love story’ happens to people, and while plenty of people might not want to read it because it’s just not their thing, or too depressing, there are those who see those dramatic prompt scenarios, and personally relate to them (I quite often say the events around Emma’s death read like a heavy-handed soap opera, or Queer Tragedy movie, and had had plenty of people agree, even before hearing all the details. And I have literally seen multiple prompts of ‘best friends secretly have feelings for each other, and then finally confess, only to get a short bit of happiness before one dies tragically’)

Write, read, love your angst, your tragic love stories, just please, be as respectful of grief (in any form, but this is mostly a shipping issue in my experience) as you would be (or should be) of other major trigger warnings. Gush and scream about the big dramatic ‘romantic’ tragedies, but don’t then ignore the raw, uncomfortable, vulnerable, cathartic explorations, or the real people dealing with real loss.

Because damn y’all, I’ve seen ‘I just love a good romantic tragedy trope, yes please rip my heart out’ said so many times, with the same tone as saying ‘That fake dating trope, that’s the good stuff’.

I’ve seen people gush over how much more interesting and beautifully cruel it is for young love to end tragically.

And I promise you. It’s not. It just fucking sucks. It’s not romantic or tragically beautiful or poignant. It’s devastating. And it goes on for so much longer than that last quarter of the story.

My grief is more than an angsty prompt. Our relationship, my love for her, is more than a dramatic sob story, more than just awkward sadness that kills the mood. Emma’s life, her memory, is more than my tragic backstory.

I want to be able to find my story in more than just fiction, I want to be able to get support from people who live with similar grief.

But I also want to see grief in fiction, in fandom, become more than a final character arc or Tragic love story; used for dramatic effect; grand and huge for a moment and then never fully processed, or mentioned again; just tragically romantic and heartbreaking and soooo good and angsty.

Grief is one of the only things we will all have to face throughout our lives.

I’m not just asking you to respect my grief or the grief of those around you. But your own future grief. I don’t want you to get there and feel like your grief is wrong, or means that you didn’t love someone ‘enough’ because it doesn’t manifest in a certain way.

Learning to accept grief; to be comfortable around raw, unpoetic, grief; to not hold up certain expressions of grief as Romantic or Poetic, but just honest, will eventually be personally useful for all of us, as much as I wish it wouldn’t.

I want my grief, everyone’s grief, to be seen, and understood, not just romanticized and dramatized.

My love story, Emma’s love story, isn’t beautifully tragic. It isn’t more interesting or poetic than a happy ending. The pain that I will carry with me for the rest of my life is not romantic.

But it is important.

#mine #my writing #tw #grief #death #car crash #fandom analysis #romantic tragedy trope

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carlatsukinamistolemyhamsandwich · 4 years

Note

9, 12, 14, 25, 28, 30, 31, 34, 37, 40, 41, 42 and 50 for the Diabolik Lovers Ask Game please! By the way, I love your blog SO MUCH. ♡♡♡

From this ask game.

Thank you for the ask anon, I’m really glad you like my blog :)

This got kind of long so I’ve put my answers below the cut.

9. Do you hate anyone in DL?

Hate is a very strong word, but if you saw my recent post on Shuu’s CL route then you’ll know that I am not the biggest Karlheinz fan. Richter and Cordelia are also fairly awful but I can’t help but feel some sort of pity for Richter as it seems he had a pretty miserable life and while some of the things Cordelia did are just horrible, my negative feelings towards her have somewhat lessened since we got a bit more of a glimpse at her backstory in DF. Menae must have died before Cordelia could really remember her, and we have to remember that she was heavily manipulated by Karl. Like yes, Cordelia is dreadful, but I still think Karl is the big bad of the series. He does so so many awful things and no matter which game you look at, I can’t help but feel that his reasoning is always pretty bleh (even if that probably is just due to not great writing).

Also after that Subaru LE ending Seiji Komori can eat dirt.

12. What do you think of the fandom?

Hmm... While I know some people hold negative views of the DL fandom at large, I don’t think any fandom is entirely unproblematic. My personal experience has generally been pretty good but I will admit I have seen some fairly terrible behavior in the 3 and a half years I’ve been seriously into DL. Then again I also haven’t been this deep in any other fandom and, sadly, I think that is just the nature of the internet.

Still, there are some amazing and very talented people in this fandom, and I feel extraordinarily lucky to have been able to interact with them, so I prefer to focus on that over anything else.

14. Sub or dub?

Sub all the way. When I first started watching anime, I initially just watched dubs, but after I started learning Japanese, I switched to subs to try and pick up some more vocab and now I can’t go back. Also I really like a lot of the Japanese voice actors in DL ^^

25. What do you think of DL haters?

I generally hold the attitude of “live and let live”. If someone doesn’t like DL because of the triggering content (and the way it deals with it) or the sometimes questionable plot then fair enough, it’s not like I think the series is without its problems. The only time I will have any issue at all is if they actively attack fans of the show. If someone is just minding their own business and not hurting anyone then under no circumstances is it okay to blindly attack them over a work of fiction. So yeah, you do you as long as you’re not being a twit about it.

28. Would you ever show your parents DL why/why not?

For anyone who remembers some of the random stuff I post, you’ll know that my mother is indeed aware of Shin’s existence (and Carla’s) which perhaps would have been difficult to avoid given that he’s plastered all over my bedroom wall and I talk about him A LOT (I am just as bad irl folks), but I’ve never gone into the details of the series with her as I feel like she’d be fairly disturbed at some of the content (and it’s for this reason that I would never show her the anime).

You will understand then, why I was slightly horrified when she told me she’d read the wiki because she wanted to know more about the characters I loved so much (like bless her, but also O.o). Apparently Carla is “a baddie” but she thinks Shin is okay.

My parents are also aware of the existence of this blog but, fortunately for me, have no interest in reading it.

30. What do you think of Yui?

I like Yui (I mean what is there to dislike?), she’s a lovely character and has a really good impact on the boys. I’m not as invested in her as perhaps some of the fandom but that’s because I am unapologetically here for the dumpster fire that is the boys.

I prefer writing reader inserts over Yui x diaboy fanfics, simply because it’s fun to see the boys in a slightly different relationship dynamic to that we get in the games (like if you look at my most recent Shin drabble, Yui would never tease Shin like that but I would so reader insert it is).

31. What is your favourite Dialover song and why?

What do you mean I have to pick just one??? Gahhh I love love love Kessen no Dies irae, because it features the Tsukinami bros and it’s just my sort of music but I think my favorite might actually be I.M.I.T.A.T.I.O.N.G.A.M.E. I’m not the biggest Kino fan but Maeno’s singing voice is phenomenal and it also brings back happy memories of when I finished Shin’s LE route for the first time.

34. Tell us your top three routes! Why are they your favourites?

Hooo boy, this is a tricky one because we all know my bias at this point ^^;; I’ve limited myself to one Shin route because otherwise this list would just be me waxing on about Shin and goodness knows I do that enough already.

1) Shin’s Lost Eden Route

While I like his DF route, I love that Shin’s LE route pays a bit more attention to his feelings towards Yui than his complicated relationship with Carla. I love that it really stretches him as a character and we get to see him relying on Yui, like I don’t know who came up with that plot but BLESS. I think the pacing is very good and the bad endings are just so tragic (and I love really angsty bad endings). And some of the scenario chapters from this route just make me melt.

I also love this route for personal reasons. I’d only just fallen into Shinhell when LE was released and I remember seeing the CGs for his route but there was no information on the plot in the English speaking side of the fandom and it was driving me nuts because I just wanted to know that he was okay. It was at this same time that I had a bit of spare money so I... bought a PSVita and a copy of Lost Eden so I could find out what happened (I was planning on getting a Vita anyway just maybe not THAT soon). I’d only been learning Japanese for 6 months (I am nothing if not horribly ambitious) but I didn’t let that stop me and played through the route. And I loved it (even if I struggled a little with the language) and I was so happy to find out what happened to him. So yeah, I just have warm memories of it.

2) Carla’s Dark Fate Route

While I like Carla’s LE route, I think the pacing and plot of his DF is just a bit better. I love that it gives us the best glimpse at the backstory of the founders (I will take any and all Krone and Giesbach tidbits I can) and I think the progression of Carla and Yui’s relationship is really well handled (even if he is dreadful towards her at times). Also I like Carla, I think of all of the diaboys, he’s one of the ones I’m most similar to so I find it easy to empathize with him.

3) Subaru’s Dark Fate Route

It’s been a while since I played this route but I remember having a really good time when I did. The Vampire Ending is incredibly sweet, as are some of the scenario chapters and I thought the plot was fairly well structured. Plus Carla and Shin are in it so bonus points there.

37. If you could change one thing in your favourite Diaboy what would it be?

I never want to answer questions like this because I love Shin as he is, I don’t want to change him.

I mean I would like for him to see more value in who he is than just his bloodline and get it into his skull that he is not inferior to Carla but only as gradual changes based on environment (or just idk talking to Carla but goodness only knows that won’t happen unless Carla’s on his deathbed again).

40. Your thoughts on Karlheinz?

See above. But yeah, not a fan, would not be sad if he became the victim of a bizarre fishing accident and never again appeared in the DL franchise but I think that’s a bit too much to hope for. Sorry Karl fans but I can’t get over the stuff he’s done (and also I have had enough of “and it was Karl’s fault all along” coming up in the games).

41. Would you buy the games if they were released in English?

I’m a little torn on this one because I love supporting Rejet and otome game localisations but I own all of the games aside from VC already so there wouldn’t really be any point. I think if I had a LOT of money to spare then I would, but as my finances stand at the moment then it’s a no.

42. If you got to design the 14th Diaboy what would he be like?

Oh this is a difficult one, ideally I’d like to see someone who was a member of one of the other demon races but I don’t think you can really have a diaboy without the blood-sucking, so I guess I’d make them half vampire half adler (as I think they’re the race we know the least about). As for personality... It’s tricky because I feel like the diaboys already cover a pretty wide spectrum. I’d probably make him a cocky jerk because I love cocky jerks and I’d make him fairly witty too but more logic than feelings orientated. I’d have him kidnap Yui because he wants to use her as a pawn against the diaboys in some nefarious plot (that I’m not going to think too much about because this post is not meant to be an OC planning session) and not because he has any interest in her or plans for her himself. I guess he’d sort of be a cross between Kino and Carla?

I’d give him a vendetta against Karlheinz too because I can :D

I had to cut this short because I started coming up with a backstory an everything but I think that’s too much ^^;;

50. Do you think Richter should have a route of his own?

Honestly? No. It’s not that I wouldn’t be interested to see the story of Richter with someone who is not Cordelia (even if he is not my favorite dude from the franchise) but more that I can’t see Rejet dropping Yui as a heroine and RichterxYui? No thank you. After all the stuff he’s done in the games and his obsession with Cordelia? I just don’t feel comfortable with that pairing, sorry.

#reply #ask game #I'm always super happy/surprised when people say they like my blog #because I feel like it's kind of chaotic but if you guys like it then I must be doing something right #character hate #?#I feel like I've been relatively polite but just to be safe #I have half tried to proofread this but it's so long #bless you if you made it to the end

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longinglook · 4 years

Text

I’m going to be gone for most of the day so I thought that the best way to use up my last 10 minutes before leaving would be to write a multi paragraph post on what I think about Fighter’s behavior so here we go

(under a read more because this could get very very long)

so. fighter. our confused messy boy we are just starting to understand

i’ve read a lot of tweets/posts/comments of people that don’t understand his behavior or think that his storyline doesn’t make sense which has always left me a bit perplexed because to me everything he does seems justified and coherent to where his mind is at the moment so i’ll try to explain

but first, something about me kfmslkcls

i identify as lesbian but i have struggled with compulsive heterosexuality all my life, i’ve spent years identifying as bi because the scary part for me was not admitting that i liked girls but admitting that i did not like boys past the occasional crushes on fictional boys and let me tell you: a lot of what fighter does/the way he thinks reminds me so much of how i was and here’s a list of things:

1) he seems a lot more at ease with same sex friends, the only times we see him with hwa you can tell that he’s forcing himself to act a certain way, he knows he’s supposed to do boyfriend things like taking her on dates and kissing but he is not comfortable with it, he tries and fails at it. of course part of the reason is because of his father but not only does he seem uniterested in her, there’s always a sense of uneasiness when he’s with her, like he’s scared of actually having to kiss her. he’s fine with the relationship as long as it’s just texting and hanging out (like a friendship would be) but he seems not to want it to become phisical. since he’s a very confused boy he’s probably blaming all of this on his father forcing him into the relationship, instead of knowing right away that he’s not interested in her

2) thinking whatever he has with tutor is just friendship and teasing: i feel like this is such a common experience for most lgbt+ folks, thinking you just have a deep friendship with someone of the same sex, only to later realize it was actually a crush and you had no idea. ex. liking the casual cuddling and touches and looking for more, paying close attention to all the displays of affection, wanting to always be close and being a little jealous of everyone else that they interact with. I feel like a lot of people go through this thinking it’s just a friendship, especially if it’s with someone of the same sex because they are not even considering the option of it being a crush. that’s why fighter keeps saying that they’re only friends and he’s behaving like a close friend would, he just doesn’t let himself consider the option because it would be way too scary and that leads us to point #3

3) being too scared to say what he wants: he does this A LOT. instead of asking for something, which would mean saying it out loud and admitting it, he just acts. words can be so scary (again making this about me, i have id’d as lesbian for over 2 years now and ive come out to a lot of friends but ive never said the word lesbian out loud because it’s just terrifying to me), and fighter seems to only use them after he has acted to justify whatever dumb shit he has done with an excuse. saying something like “i kissed you because i wanted to” would mean admitting he wants to kiss another man (meaning he’s not straight) and that man is fighter (meaning he has feelings for him). it’s much easier for him to go with the flow and do first, explain later. and by explaining i mean lying, even to himself because deep down he knows, of couse he knows what’s going on but acknowledging it would have serious implications on his life.

also the way he reacts to tutor asking him if he likes boys is a big indicator of what's going on with him, it's his way of answering, not his way of avoiding the question. he can't say it out loud so he shows it but then he's scared of the consequences and no homos it. and the choice of replaying the question scene while they're making out shows us that fight is tormented by it, he's scared of other people asking him that as well, now that tutor has noticed it more people could as well and that's why he pulls away.

4) on a similar note, teasing until tutor does something/not wanting to be the one to start it: this is pure fighter behavior, hoping tutor will be the one to start it so he doesn’t have to. i called this gay chicken last week, it’s fighter making everything into a challenge so he can blame it on tutor and say that he was just reacting. we can see how desperate he is for tutor’s attention, how happy he is when he has it and how frustrated he is when he doesn’t. he’s like a child who wants people to pay attention to him but doesn’t know how to ask for it, so they start annoying people. fight knows very well that he could just say hey tutor i’m here, please talk to me but how could he give a realistic reason for it other than because i have a massive crush on you meaning i’m not straight. he knows tutor doesn’t back down from a challenge and he riles him up because he has learned what that will lead them to. it’s like he knows there’s an easier way to get to that, but it’s scary so he just keeps going with his soundproof tesing tacting which so far has worked every time. also in general reacting is a lot easier than acting, again a personal example: if someone asks me if i like girls I’ll say yes right away, but if i have to start the conversation i won’t. (one thing i do a lot is to be like “hey i have something to tell you about myself but you have to guess it”)

5) backtracking/giving mixed signals: again he’s terrified, he knows what he wants but he knows what /wanting it/ implies. sometimes he follows his heart, but then his brain comes back to tell him that, hey, you’re kissing another dude and you’re enjoying it and of course he freaks out and leaves. i would be way more annoyed with him if the show had been portraying tutor as pining and in love, meaning that fighter has been giving him false-ish hopes, but after ep.6 we see that tutor himself still hasn’t admitted to himself that he likes fighter (in bold because i feel like this part is very important and often overlooked) so they are both confused about their feelings.

i don’t think they are actually confused, they know but they are scared which in my opinion is very realistic of how someone behaves when they thought they were straight and they are not. It’s not about being dumb or being slow, it’s about realizing that once you take that step and acknowledge you’re not straight your life changes. idk how many of you are actually not straight (i assume most just because tumblr) but like…… coming out is so stressful being straight is just so much easier you dont have to do shit i wish that were me

6) his father: i feel like we only grazed the surface of fighter’s daddy issues, but he seems to be a very controlling and inflexible man, meaning that he probably wouldn’t be thrilled at the idea of his son dating another man. we don’t know about fight’s past, and maybe he has already had crushes on men and had to repress them. fighter seems to be used to a pretty luxurious lifestyle, he can’t just fuck off and go against his father because he would lose his support.

so it’s not just admitting things to himself, which can be insanely hard on its own especially if you were brought up in a traditional family, it’s also having to deal with the reactions from everyone around you

I KEEP THINKING ABOUT NEW THINGS TO ADD TO THIS POST SORRY anyway i think fighter has already shown multiple times that he does care for tor, it's just in a very shy and lowkey way because he's scared of giving himself away but he does indeed worry about tor (ex. he notices tor is stressed about his test, he tries to help outat his part time job). it also seems that in times of urgency he's more explicit about ex. offering to pay off his debt when tor was being threatened or saying he's his boyfriend when the gross cafe dude was hitting on him

also can we talk about how heartbreaking and soft fighter can be when he lets down his guard and shows his emotional side ex. telling tor nobody has ever taken care of him like that or the way he looks every time tutor pulls away first... this poor boy is touch starved and he craves affection but he can't ask for it yet. he's going to be a real gem once he can be honest with his feelings

for future episodes i think that tutor and fighter are well on their way to realizing their feelings for each other and there's going to be some development soon, but i dont expect fighter to come out to anyone else in the next few episodes because there's a lot of work to be done still. i just hope they dont pull the /i dont like boys i just like you/ trope because i WILL drop this show. so. fast. please don't ruin this character please let him accept his attraction to men fully

in conclusion. i dont blame fighter for anything he has done so far, he’s scared shitless but knows what’s going on, i trust he will soon be brave enough to start being honest with himself and with tutor

man this did NOT take 10 minutes to write and i dont have time to proofread

#fightertutor #zee pruk #why r u #why r u the series #why r u?#why ru the series #why ru #fighter #text #meta

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justdyingslowly · 4 years

Text

1. Name justdyingslowly obviously come on

2. Nationality Australian

3. Age 22

4. Birthday nnnah dont feel like it

5. Zodiac sign (or your primal zodiac sign) Libra/Scorpio cusp

6. Gender wamon

7. Sexuality very very hetero

8. Your looks (add a picture or describe yourself) androgenous

9. What do you/did you study? Psychology (focus on sexology) and art.

10. What’s your current job like?/What job would you like to have? I am disabled you think I can work ha sexologist would be awesome. When I was a kid I wanted to be a fireman but Australias always burning

11. Your birth order head first

12. How many siblings do you have? 1

13. Do you have good relations with your family? yeah dads finally out of his abusive relationship, nearing age 70 and his emotions and his sexuality are finally opening up for the first time and that makes me SO happy.

14. How many friends do you have? what kind of fucked up question is this.

15. Your relationship status relationshipped. Fiance? got the marriage papers in a drawer somewhere with the car rego but can’t be fucked filling them?

16. What do you look for in a SO? empathetic, mature, calm. Always open to discussion. Prefers to be blunt rather than secretive. Emotional age over 14 (incredibly fucking rare apparently). Puts an importance on context and understanding other views above all else.

17. Do you have a crush? Hellll yeah Crush on my partner and got a crush on a mutual friend of ours who don’t even know hes cute af hehe one day partners gonna accidentally spill the beans and embarrass me coz hes shit with secrets RIP me.

18. When did you have your first kiss? You think I can remember this bullshit? Its not that big a deal

19. Do you prefer serious and meaningful relationships or casual dating/one night stands? One night stand sex almost exclusively sucks. Just. SUCKS. Because neither of you know what the other likes and it ends up being an awkward mix of trying to please yourself while trying to also be considerate.

20. What are your deal breakers? Plugging your ears to anything that feels gross, uncomfortable or disagrees with you. How can you grow as a person without introspection? How can you mold what you think and believe without taking in other arguments and comparing them to your beliefs to see how they stack up? Its pathetic.

21. How was your day? cute mutual friend had a fall this morning and were both worried about him. His back is bad and he’s getting a little older, he can’t be getting dizzy and having falls like that. other than that im anxious about seeing my gastro. He’s lovely but... specialists are specialists. Good at knowing what they know but not always great at listening.

22. Favourite food & drink you think im allowed to eat or drink? water and... foods a touchy subject.

23. What position do you sleep in? Usually on my side with a body pillow to grip so I don’t end up choking my partner in his sleep.

24. What was your last dream about? uuhhh...going to italy and being unable to get into this tiny basket boat properly.

25. Your fears does PTSD to medical shit count haha

26. Your dreams ... going to italy and being unable to get into a tiny basket boat thingy?

27. Your goals - get some sort of diagnosis eventually. Its been 3 years of trying and im tired. - get back to studying art part time for my bachelors. - pass JLPT N3. - go back to university for psychology. - do the dishes when I get home.

28. Any pets? two budgies. we also take care of any orphaned or injured birds.

29. What are your hobbies? feeling nauseous drawing writing a little bit im making a little gameboy game in C atm too

30. Any cool places in your area? i live next to a national park with waterfalls and koalas and emus and stuff

31. What was your last awkward situation? mutual friend made a comment on his chest i playfully smacked it (related to the comment) it was surprisingly hard “O-oh wow, thats... I didnt expect that” my partner laughed at me. it was awful.

32. What is your last regret? getting embarrassed at friends pecs stop making me think about it 33. Language/s you can speak english. N4 Japanese.

34. Do you believe in astrological stuff? (Zodiac, tarot, etc.) of course not what the fuck

35. Have any quirks? Quirkless. I do wiggle when im happy though apparently.

36. Your pet peeves open doors.

37. Ideal vacation spend a months chilling in an old japanese house in autumn hokkaido oooooof that sounds nice

38. Any scars? internal? yes

39. What does your last text message say? peepee poopoo ustinky

40. Last 5 things from your search history how do i find this

41. What’s your [device] background? Sam Porter Bridges walkin around Sam Porter Bridges cuddling BB-28 Louise while he sleeps my chicken

42. What do you daydream about? all might

43. Describe your dream home an old japanese house in autumn hokkaido oooooof that sounds nice

44. What’s your religion/Your thought about religion its a comforting thought having a parent-figure who cares about you and looks after all the big things you can’t manage yourself, but institutionalizing it runs a severe risk of becoming harmful cults. And it often does.

45. Your personality type me

46. The most dangerous thing you’ve done i saw the lost bunny that was on all the posters in the neighbourhood looked thin and patchy so i grabbed him to take him home. im allergic. sent me to hospital and I almost died.

47. Are you happy with your current life? feeling sick sucks and partners having a depressive episode but things are pretty good

48. Some things you’ve tried in your life living

49. What does your wardrobe consist of? blacks, reds, whites and pinks

50. Favourite colour to wear? at the moment pink. Red is always comforting though.

51. How would you describe your style? mix between lazy alternative punk, teenager with band shirts and harajuku peach kawaii uwu

52. Are you happy with your current looks? kinda wish i was a bit shorter but what can you do

53. If you could change/add something to your appearance - impossible or not - what would it be? bit shorter

54. Any tattoos or piercings? lol no PTSD

55. Do you get complimented often? by who? partner constantly, family haha are you kidding im australian so a friend’s version of showing affection is calling you a cunt and slapping your ass in public

56. Favourite aesthetic? all might

57. A popular trend that you dislike blocking because you disagree or find them distasteful. Ignoring all context to opposing thoughts and arguments. taking a personal feeling of disgust to mean something is evil. Blocking your ears to anything that isn’t a circlejerk of what you already think - and trying to isolate anyone who even just listens to something other then the noise of your sloppy dicks to have a thought of their own.

58. Songs you’re currently obsessed with? The Machine by Low Roar

59. Song you normally wouldn’t admit you like. why wouldnt i admit i like a song

60. Favourite genre? probably enka haha

61. Favourite artist/band/genre? probably enka haha oh and tatsuro yamashita

62. Hated popular songs/artists? why the hell would I hate something like a song? I hate aspects of the music industry as a whole I guess?

63. Put your music on shuffle and list first 5 which playlist they aren’t all together in one place

64. Can you sing or play any instruments? piano, saxophone... uh... partners good at making music and playing shakuhachi

65. Do you like karaoke? no.

66. Own any albums? yes? many?

67. Do you listen to radio? What stations? no. but triple J, ABC Jazz and Classical. sometimes they even play final fantasy and JRPG music on classical which is pretty neat. -

68. Favourite movie/series? can i make this about games because then the answer is Metal Gear Solid

69. Favourite genre of movies/books/etc ...shounen?

70. Your fictional crush/es if they’re over 40yrs old, male and happy and bubbily or grumpy and sad then there’s a big ol fat chance I wanna bone. Solid Snake from MGS4, All Might and pretty much anyone drawn by Tarou Madoromi.

71. Which fictional character is you? uh

72. Are you a shipper? List your otps, if so what does this even mean what language is this

73. Favourite greek god? idk hades seems chill

74. A legend from where you live that you like the story of Tjilbruke is funny and good. all Kaurna stories are good.

75. Do you like art? What’s your favourite work or artist? im in a big egon schiele mood atm.

76. Can you share your other social media? no i am incapable

77. Favourite youtubers? many

78. Favourite platform? not too high up. actually i like being a little lower than ground level in corners.

79. How much time do you spend on the internet? too much

80. What video games have you played? Which one’s your favourite? look i just want to say that MGS4 is the best one in the series and Death Stranding is phenomenally engaging.

81. Your favourite books (manga also counts) these are all so goddamn definitive how can I pick? Oh wait the answer is One Piece

82. Do you play board/card games? I play DnD atm and know 15 yr old rules to Yugioh

83. Have you ever been to a night marathon in cinema? that shit dosn’t happen here

84. Favourite holiday golden week coz its a week also easter because thats when all the glucose based sweets come back

85. Are you into dramas? what kind

86. Would you use death note, if you had one? no. thats called being a murderer.

87. What changes would you make in the world, no matter how impossible, if you had the power to? chill people out a bit. when people feel unsafe they get really depenfive and territorial and block their ears to everything, making in-and-out groups for themsevles that end up putting them in more harm.

88. Could you survive a zombie apocalypse? im disabled with a disabled partner. we arent funny sure we can survive normal everyday life when society is angled so sharply against us.

89. If you had to be turned into a paranormal being, what would it be? id like to be a mimi spirit

90. What would you want to happen to you after your death? spooky time

91. If you had to change your name, what would be your pick? toshinori yagi

92. Who would you switch your life with for a week? anyone healthy

93. Pick an emoji to be your tattoo that cursed one with the intense eyes and the hand

94. Write 3 things about yourself - only one of them must be true im me im not me im pee

95. Cold or hot? cold.

96. Be a hero or be a villain? both are distasteful ideas in reality

97. Sing everything you want to say or rhyme? i can’t do either partner speak sin bad puns and its hell, these both sound about equal

98. Shapeshifting or controlling time? shapeshifting. controlling time is eithe rmanipulative or lonely. shapeshifing is every other superpower at once.

99. Be immortal or be immune to everything aside from natural death? both are deeply upsetting ideas

100. ….. or …..? jiji or ossan? generally Jiji, but ossans can be lovely too.

#personal #stupid

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