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a-write-for-soreeyes · 7 months

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Yes, Chef [OPLA Sanji x Afab!Reader SMUT]

Pairing : OPLA Sanji x Chef (AFAB) Reader

Summary : Sanji is the only one you call 'Chef'. One night when you're the only ones working the late shift he finally confronts you about why.

Warnings : 18+ !!!!!!, NSFW/SMUT, Semi-public sex (kitchen), Oral (fem receiving), some slight dirty talk?, the apron stays ON during foreplay, Use of the term 'Chef' in a sexual way, Top!Sanji, Bottom!Reader

Word Count : 3685 (good lord)

A/N : I have never written smut before but I think this went really well! I had one quote (that quote from Fleabag the hot priest says) and a dream (sanji brain rot and my sexy playlist), so please feel free to leave your thoughts! <3

“y/n I think we’ve known each other long enough you can stop calling me ‘Chef’.”

“Yes, Chef I know” You said, carefully placing the garnish on the plate of steak and seared vegetables at your station. It was the last call of the night and of course a group had walked in right as you and Sanji had finished clearing your stations for the night.

Placing the final plate on the counter you hit the bell, one of the servers came through the doors to the kitchen grabbing the plate and turning on their heel pushing through back to the rowdy group of pirates in the dining room. Turning back to your station and beginning to stack your pots and pans, placing the used utensils inside the pot and carrying them over to the sink, ready to re-wash them.

A comfortable quiet had washed over the kitchen, only broken by the boisterous chatter from the last table of the night. “You can head out if you’d like. I’m going to put together a new dessert I’ve been practicing for these gentlemen, hopefully get them to tip better after coming in right before closing.” Sanji had called from across the kitchen while grabbing ingredients from the pantry.

“Chef, if you don’t like my company you can just say and I’ll get out of your hair.” You joked,

“Ay don’t you ever say that gorgeous, you know I love your company,” Sanji flirted pausing next to you, “Someone with good looks and good conversation, how could I not want you around?” He winked, continuing his stride back to his station.

“I think I’ll stick around once I’m done with these if it’s all the same to you, Chef. You know how much I love to taste whatever new recipes you put together.” You replied with a smile. You really did enjoy being able to be the first person to taste all of Sanji’s cooking, and you suppose being the only person in the kitchen late at night, with your criminally good looking coworker wasn’t so bad either. Rolling up your sleeves and plunging your hands into the warm water of the sink you began to scrub at your dishes.

You scrubbed in silence for a few moments, washing the grime and the stress of the day away. “Really y/n, you can go home I really don’t mind,” Sanji walked next to you leaning his side against the counter stacked high with plates and cups that would need to be washed during tomorrows slow hours, “You’ve already stayed late enough, just finish up your dishes and turn in for the night.” Out of the corner of your eye you could see him looking over your face,

“It’s fine, Chef you know I would probably be awake anyw-” Your sentence and scrubbing stopped as Sanji reached forwards wiping a smear of some ingredient from your cheek, letting his thumb linger on your cheek for just a moment, your face heating at the intimacy of the moment.

“Sorry love,” He said, pulling his hand away from your face and placing it back on the counter next to you, “Couldn’t focus on your beautiful face with something covering it.”

This has always been the game between the two of you. When you had joined the Baratie’ crew almost 3 years ago, Sanji had started working his charm on you from day one, flustering you everytime causing you to always avoid his flirtatious gaze. Although it had taken you about two months to get comfortable with the pleasure he takes in flirting with you, (leaving you mildly excited each time he had thrown a nickname your way) the day that you did start flirting back was possibly the best day of Sanji’ life, (although he wouldn’t be admitting that to anyone anytime soon) and possibly the worst of yours. The embarrassment you felt every time you gave a flirtatious response, effectively causing you to never have the guts to look him in the eyes.

And although his flirting was nothing new, something about being the only people in the quiet kitchen after a busy Friday night, had the soft way Sanji was speaking to you to have a new feeling behind it.

“Sanji, I’m fine really. I’ll finish these up and then I want to taste whatever you’re supposed to be cooking over there, for our lovely guests.” You softly broke the tension, not looking up at him from the murky water. Sanji chuckled and pushed off the counter, making his way back to his abandoned pastry mix. Resuming your washing the both of you working contently in each other's presence.

—-

Placing the last of your now clean dishes back at your station and wiping your hands on the towel you always had draped over the string of your apron. Slugging your way over to Sanji's station, you hiked yourself up onto the counter next to him, huffing out a quiet “Whatever you’ve got baking smells amazing Chef. I can’t wait to taste whatever it is.”

Sanji chuckled, continuing to whisk whatever he was whipping up for a “quick dessert”.

“They’re strawberry macarons, with an easy butterscotch drizzle on top.”

“Ah yes Chef, a very simple dessert, definitely not a complicated pastry that can take years to master.” Laughing, Sanji put down the bowl and grabbed his dish towel, turning towards the oven behind him, taking hold of the hot baking sheet in his covered hand. Turning back to you he gently swatted your side, placing the hot tray down where you had been sitting.

“For your information the pastry is not the hard part for me. It’s the filling that always gets me.”, Using his one hand to pull the macaron shells up from the pan, Sanji stuck his finger in the bowl on his right swiping up some of the filling he had been whipping up on his finger, and held it out to you, “Here give this a try, I know it’s missing something I just can’t quite place it.”

Seeing Sanji hold his finger out, covered in the pink buttercream filling, you made the conscious decision that this was going to be your winning move in this game of cat and mouse you and him had been playing for the past years. You leaned forwards and wrapped your mouth around his finger, the taste of the sweet icing flowing over your tongue. Swirling your tongue around his finger to get the last of the filling off of his digit.

“It’s good. Could maybe use a little more powdered sugar, get it to thicken up a bit more.” You shrugged.

Sanji was silent. Not even a flirtatious remark about how ‘you’re all the sugar I need sugar’ just silence. Looking at Sanji directly (for possibly the first time in months) you were shocked at the way he was looking at you. So gently, so full of love and something else you couldn’t quite place. Surprise? Uncomfortability? You weren’t sure, only assuming the worst, regret flooded your body immediately. Sanji opened his mouth to speak but you beat him to it, hanging your head,

“I-I’m so sorry Chef, I-I don’t know what I was thinking, I guess I just thought it would be funny considering how much we fake flirt with each other, but I’m now realizing that that was WILDLY inappropriate especially to someone who is a much better chef than I am- I’m so so sorry Chef-”

“Ah, fuck you calling me “Chef” like it doesn’t turn you on just to say it.” Your head snapped up to look him directly in the eyes.

“Wha-what?”

“You heard what I said.” He smirked at you, blond hair falling in front of his left eye, “The way you say it any moment you possibly can, ‘yes Chef’, ‘I’m sorry Chef’, ‘Of course I can Chef’. You think I haven’t noticed how I’m the only one you call that?” Sanji stalking around the counter, placed one hand on the counter at either side of you.

He leaned into you, his hot breath fanning over your neck, “Everytime you say that stupid fucking title,you know what it does to me. What it makes me think of.”

Shivering at the feeling of his breath you turned your face towards him, “And what does it make you think of, Chef?” A low rumble reverberated from Sanji’ chest, now pressing up close to you.

Sanji tilted his head, lips just barely ghosting over yours, “Would you like me to show you?” You gave an embarrassed nod.

His lips were soft against yours, tasting of cigarettes and the mint he used to try and cover the previous. Pushing himself up against you, you could feel your underwear beginning to slick. Teeth clashing together you ran your hand up Sanji’ back, neck and up into his blonde hair. One of his own hands wrapping around your waist, the other sliding up the front of your apron and giving your breast a soft squeeze. You gasped, and fast as lightning Sanji slipped his tongue into your mouth exploring it with a small groan at the feeling.

Using the heated kiss as a distraction Sanji began to unbutton your uniform, pausing every few buttons to bring his hands up to your face, deepening your make out before going back to his main mission of releasing you from your shirt.

Finally undoing the final button of your uniform Sanji reached into your shirt with one hand swiping over your tit, causing it to harden under his calloused hand, even with the fabric of your bra separating them. Although Sanji made quick work of that issue, easily reaching around you and unclasping the irritating bra pulling it down under your breasts, allowing them to bounce slightly with the force of your making out. Removing his other hand from your waist Sanji roughly cupped your breasts in his hands bringing them out from behind your apron. Squeezing them with his large hands, your apron roughly scraping against the soft flesh, you moaned into the unstopping kisses. Hiking you up onto the edge of the counter Sanji gave himself better access to your chest, leaning down to your right tit and taking it into his mouth, tongue swirling around the nipple, leaving kisses, nips and hickies all around. His left hand grasping at your other tit Sanji pinches at the bud for a few moments before switching. Moans leaving your mouth, you bit your lip nearly drawing blood, as you used one hand to pull his head closer into your chest, the other pulling off his ascot, apron and starting on the snap buttons of his uniform.

“Please, Chef please.” You whimpered, beginning to roll your hips on him, the feeling of his warm mouth on your chest with no friction on your lower parts starting to take its toll on you. Feeling Sanji groan and roll against the counter he pulled back looking at you, hair a mess, eyes glazed over in arousal he ripped the apron and top from off your body, bra following immediately after. During the moment of separation you ripped his now crumpled shirt off, tossing it somewhere in the kitchen out of your vision, which was now focused solely on taking in Sanji’ gorgeous figure.

Grabbing his face and pulling him towards you hungerly you continued to make out. Sanji began to press his body against yours reaching behind your figure to swipe the forgotten baking sheet off the counter creating room for him to be able to push you back into a lying position, the heat of the counter where the hot pans of pastries had just been only seconds earlier caused you to let out a gasp, arching your back to get away from the heat pressing your breasts right into Sanji’s hard chest, his hand going behind you to pull your torso as close to him as possible.

Pulling back from the kiss, Sanji gently laid you down fully on the counter. Running his hands down your sides he began to kiss his way down your body stopping to leave small nips around your chest and hips. Pulling away Sanji started work on your belt, unbuckling it and immediately going for your buttons. You begin to fuss at the feeling of his hands being so close to where you need him but he has yet to touch you.

“I know love, don't worry, I’m gonna make you feel so good.” he whispered out, pressing a kiss to your thigh as he finally slid your pants off, leaving you in just your panties. Groaning at the sight of you trying to hump the air to get any friction to quell the desire you feel, Sanji brought a finger up to your covered mound, gently ghosting it along causing you to let a loud whimper escape from your lips. “Darling you’re soaked. If I didn’t know any better I’d think you want me to make you feel good?”

Gripping the edges of the counter whimpered “Yes. Yes yes please Chef, please make me feel good.”

Sanji smirked up at you, already fidgeting and he hasn’t even started yet. “Well, when you put it like that. I guess I have no choice.” He pulled your panties down grabbing them in one hand and used the other to grasp your hip bringing your soaked pussy right to him, immediately beginning his assault, licking up your folds and once he reached the top starting to suck on your clit, swirling his tongue around the small bud. Your hand shot down for Sanji’ bleach blond hair, fisting it and using it to pull him right into you, wrapping your legs around his head when he stuck his tongue right into your pussy.

“Oh fuck! Yes, god please!” You moaned, at the sound of your moans and whimpers Sanji could feel the tent in his pants straining, he beginning to slightly hump at the air, getting pleasure from just the motions he made.

Feeling the knot begin to form in your stomach you started to pant and hump his face faster. Sanji getting the message stopped tongue fucking you to resume sucking on your clit bringing his right hand down to your entrance sticking 2 fingers in you easily between the slick and spit that had been pooling there. The pleasure assaulting your senses caused you to lurch forwards, nails scraping against Sanji's scalp causing him to moan against you.

Between the feeling of Sanji sucking on your clit, his fingers rapidly pushing in and out of you and the vibrations of the moans he was letting out you felt the knot in your stomach snap, shaking your felt yourself release all over his face, practically screaming out into the echoes of the kitchen,

“Yes, yes fuck, yes Chef! Fuck!” When the feeling of your first orgasm of the night finished and your clit started to become overstimulated you leant back against your arm, releasing your hold on Sanji's hair to run one hand through it and tried to pull yourself away from his mouth still licking up your wetness and kissing around your nub.

“Uhh, Chef- Chef please too- too much” Pulling himself off of you Sanji leant back on his heels, a string of spit and cum connecting him to you. You took a moment to admire him as he caught his breath. He looked beautiful, face covered in your cum with strings of it and drool connecting the two of you, hair sticking in all directions from your harsh pulling and his eyes, god his eyes he had a look in them you’d only ever hoped to see, he was so drunk on your pussy you’re not even sure he knew where the two of you were right now.

Grabbing his right wrist from where his fingers were still brushing against your pussy lips you pulled him up to you, locking your lips in another kiss, this one much more gentle and soft than the previous rough make out you had. Pushing your tongue into his mouth you could taste yourself on his tongue, occasionally kissing around his mouth and along his jawline to collect more of your slick from his face. Sanji let out a gasp as you kissed up his jaw and to his ear, giving it a slight nip before whispering to him, “You made me feel so good Chef. I wanna do the same for you.”

Standing to his full height Sanji started to work on his belt, hands shaking in anticipation at finally being able to feel you around him. You started work on the button on his bottoms, purposely brushing your hand against his erection feeling it twitch at every touch you gave him. Reaching your hands up to his waistband Sanji pulled down his pants and underwear in one swoop as he stepped out of the pool of fabric now at his feet. Cradling your face in his large hands Sanji ran his thumb down your cheekbone and swiped it over your lips.

"I wanna make you feel good, let me make you feel good.”, You looked up at him with half lidded eyes, your hand lazily wrapping around his hard-on, stroking him and running your thumb over his head using the precum that had begun to bead there as lube for your lazy motions. “Please Chef.” You felt his cock twitch at the title and his breathing hitch.

“We can feel good together love. Just let me take care of you this time.” At that Sanji guided you back to your lying position against the now cold countertop of his work station. Taking a moment to admire you splayed out before him Sanji ran his hands down the backs of your thighs pushing them up to give himself access to your wet cunt.

Rubbing the head of his cock against your folds he collected some of your slick before he watched his cock disappear into you. A growl coming from him as he felt you tighten around his shaft.

Keening at the feeling of yourself stretching around him, your eyes rolling back as he pushed further finally bottoming out. Sanji paused allowing you a chance to adjust to his size he could feel you tighten around him.

Slowly, he began to pull almost all the way out of you before rocking back in, the both of you groaning at the feeling. Sanji looked up at your face, eyes almost completely closed and mouth open gasping in pleasure. He reached forwards grasping your soft hand in his own rough one giving something for you to ground yourself on through the pleasure.

“Chef please-!” you whimpered at the feeling of his thrusts starting to pick up speed.

“Fuck love, you feel so good squeezing around me.” Sanji groaned into your ear, leaving sloppy kisses around your jaw and down your neck, his cock burying into you at a rapid pace.

Your moans and huffs at the overwhelming feelings you were experiencing getting louder with each thrust, to the point you were almost crying out in pleasure. Sanji captured your lips again roughly making out with you in an attempt to quiet you, although between your moans and the squelch of his cock pistoning in and out of you it was nearly impossible to do so.

Sanji could feel his high approaching with each thrust, “I-I’m close, fuck darling you feel so good-” he sighed pressing your foreheads together.

“I-I’m so close, please Chef. Please let me cum please!” You blubbered against his lips, tears beginning to form and run down your cheeks, you could feel every inch of him in you, stretching you, pressing against every part of you, his head kissing your cervix.

“Just a little more baby, just give me a little more.” Pounding into your cunt, slick running down both of you, you wrapped your legs around his back pulling him impossibly closer, the hand that was resting coming down to rub furiously at your clit, “come for me love, come all over my cock.” Your mouth opened in a silent scream as you felt yourself release all over his cock, your pussy clamping down, you cried out,

“Fuck! Chef!”

At the feeling of you cumming around him Sanji knew he just needed a few more before he to came undone, or- “Fuck Sanji!” your eyes rolling back, and that was his breaking point. At the sound of you crying out his name, his real name for the first time since you’ve met, not some title he’d heard a thousand times before, Sanji came. Ropes of his cum painting your insides with his release he shuttered, his vision blanking at the overwhelming bliss he was experiencing from cumming inside you for the first time.

The air between you two hot and heavy as you both stayed still just enjoying the intimacy of the moment. Sanji gave a few final sluggish thrusts to help you both ride the end of your pleasures before the feeling became too much. He pulled out gently being sure not to overwhelm you, the sound of your mixed cum quietly dripping from you both onto the tiled floor beneath him.

Basking in the afterglow of the scene, foreheads pressed together you tilted your head up locking your lips in a tender kiss. Bringing your hand that was not clasped in Sanji's up to caress his face, taking in the way the soft light reflected off his glistening forehead and the beads of sweat that dripped from his disheveled hair down the curves and lines of his face.

“You’re beautiful.”

“I’m pretty sure I’m the one who’s supposed to say that to you, Love.” He chuckled, allowing the seriousness of the moment to fade away into comfortable giggles. “I love you.” He breathed out, gazing at you, trying to memorize everything about you in this moment, from how your messy hair splayed out behind you to the dried tear tracks down your face. Looking back into his blue eyes,

“I love you Sanji.”

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#sanji x reader smut #opla sanji x reader #sanji x reader #opla sanji x reader smut #smut #opla sanji #one piece live action #one piece netflix

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handmade-witch · 2 months

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part 5 baby!! Slytherin boys x Incorrect Quote Generaror~

Part 1 ☆ Part 2 ☆ Part 3 ☆ Part 4 ☆ Part 6

Draco: Hey, are you free?

Blaise: No, I’m expensive.

☆☆☆

Mattheo: Go fuck yourself.

Lorenzo: Come over here and fuck me yourself you coward!

☆☆☆

Mattheo: BE A BETTER PERSON!

[Y/N]: WHY?!

Mattheo: BECAUSE SOMEONE NEEDS TO HAVE MORALS IN THIS RELATIONSHIP, AND IT SURE AS FUCK AIN'T GONNA BE ME, SWEETHEART!

☆☆☆

Draco: *venting endlessly to Mattheo about their week*

Mattheo, every once in a while: *in a monotone* Wow, that is so wild.

☆☆☆

Mattheo: Astrology is fun because I can pretend that all of my behaviors are just a result of being a Gemini and not symptoms of mental illness.

[Y/N]: Being a Gemini is a mental illness. That’s not hate it’s just a fact.

☆☆☆

Blaise: What are you doing here?

Draco: I could ask you the same question.

Blaise: I live here. This is my house.

Draco: I should probably ask you a different question.

☆☆☆

*Lorenzo and [Y/N] texting*

Lorenzo: Come downstairs and talk to me please. I'm lonely.

[Y/N]: Isn't Mattheo there?

Lorenzo: Yes but I like you more.

☆☆☆

Theodore, about Mattheo: I could fix them, but honestly whatever the hell is wrong with them is way funnier.

Draco: That's what any god probably thinks about me.

☆☆☆

Lorenzo: From now on we will be using code names.

Lorenzo: You can address me as Eagle One.

Lorenzo: Draco is “been there done that”.

Lorenzo: [Y/N] is “currently doing that”.

Lorenzo: Blaise is “it happened once in a dream”.

Lorenzo: Mattheo is “if I had to pick a(nother) dude.”

Lorenzo: And Theodore is..

Lorenzo: Eagle Two

Theodore: Oh thank god.

☆☆☆

Blaise: Anyone d-

[Y/N]: Depressed?

Theodore: Drained?

Lorenzo: Dumb?

Mattheo: Disliked?

Blaise: -done with their work... what is wrong with you people...

☆☆☆

Draco: I dare you-

[Y/N]: Mattheo is not allowed to accept dares anymore.

Draco: Why not?

Mattheo: "I have no regard for my own or others personal safety", as some would say.

☆☆☆

Theodore, at [Y/N]: Would you like to stay for dinner?

Mattheo, from the kitchen: Would you like to stay forever!?!

☆☆☆

[Y/N]: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Theodore?

Theodore: No.

Lorenzo: I do!

[Y/N]: I know, Lorenzo.

Lorenzo: I’m sad.

[Y/N]: I know, Lorenzo.

☆☆☆

Mattheo: Ooh, somebody has a crush

Theodore: Pfft, I don’t have a crush on [Y/N] I just think they’re cool, it’s not like I stay up at night thinking about them.

*Later that night*

Theodore, very much awake: Uh oh.

☆☆☆

Kidnapper: I have one of your friends.

[Y/N]: Which one? I have six.

Kidnapper: The loud, annoying, rowdy one who never shuts up.

[Y/N] Which one? I have six.

Pansy, distantly: HEY!!!

☆☆☆

Mattheo: I have very high standards, you know.

Theodore: I can make spaghetti...

Mattheo: Oh no! You're meeting all my standards!

☆☆☆

Blaise: You bought a taco?

Draco: Yes.

Blaise: From the same truck that hit Lorenzo?!

Draco, with a mouthful of taco: Well, me starving ain't gonna help them.

☆☆☆

Mattheo: In alcohol’s defense, I’ve done some pretty dumb shit while completely sober too.

☆☆☆

Theodore: Can you be serious for five minutes?

Lorenzo: My record is four, but I think I can do it.

#slytherin boys #lorenzo berkshire #theodore nott #blaise zabini #draco malfoy #harry potter universe #matteo riddle #lorenzo berkshire x reader #theodore nott x reader #mattheo riddle x reader #incorrect quotes

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honkytonk-hangman · 10 months

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Line of Sight [3]

JAKE ‘HANGMAN’ SERESIN X READER

Summary: Jake gets competitive. You happen to find that incredibly sexy.

Warnings: language? frank conversations? mostly just fluff <3

Notes: PART THREE AT LAST !!!!! thank you so so so so so much to @roleycoleyland for the encouragement and friendship during the very long writing process for this one, this is for u hehehe <3

Masterlist

You have to stop and blink down at your phone in confusion when it starts ringing at 3pm on a Saturday afternoon. After complaining last weekend to Hangman that you didn’t have his phone number, he’d made sure you didn’t leave the bar without it.

You never expected that he would be the one to call first.

“We’re going mini golfing at six.” Hangman informs you matter of factly down the line, not even giving you a chance to greet him when you pick up.

“Yes, hello, Hangman, it’s good to hear from you, too!” you say as if talking to a preschooler. You can practically hear his eyes rolling as the sound of a phone being adjusted crinkles in your ear.

“It’s just Jake,” he ignores your attempt to tease him, and for a moment your heart sinks in an all-too familiar way. “And get ready, it’s already five.” he adds, his tone full of faux sternness.

“Is this your way of being nice to me? I think I liked it better when you ignored me…” you joke, rolling your own eyes. On the other end, Hangman is silent for a beat and you think he must have stopped moving entirely, because all background noise has ceased too.

“David has invited us for a double date, apparently he didn’t get enough of his ass handed to him last week.” He says then, as if suddenly remembering this fact. You start, jolting in your spot, your features automatically turning down.

“He what?!” you demand, before suddenly realising Hangman must have exchanged numbers with David at some point, how else would they have organised this apparent double-date.

“We’re going mini-golfing with David and Yas. We’re going to destroy them, remember?” He asks as if you’re the one losing your mind.

“Yeah! At pool, Hangman! You already did that! I don’t wanna go mini-golfing with David!” you try your best not to sound like you’re whining, but even you can hear that it's a lost cause. Wherever Hangman is, you hear him tut and let out an exasperated breath.

“It’s just Jake. Besides, you said, and I quote sweetheart; ‘nothing left to bury’. I’ve got tone and now I’m just confirming the kill!” he reasons, but it only serves to confuse you slightly.

“Why are you being so insistent about this?! He’s my ex!” you stress, voice rising just a little in your frustration.

“Exactly!” Hangman’s volume matches your own, and it quickly silences any other protests you might have. You might have heard him get rowdy at the Hard Deck before, but you have never ever heard him raise his voice above a friendly call.

He doesn’t speak again immediately after that, and it’s quiet for so long you have to pull your phone away from your ear to check if the call is even still active. Just when you’re about to relent and apologise for shouting, Hangman sighs again, and you can almost perfectly picture him dragging his hand down his face.

“Just let me do this for you, alright? You won’t even have to do anything except look real pretty and maybe kiss my cheek whenever I get a hole in one!”

You have to blink at his sudden switch up, both seemingly pleading with you and blatant flirting within the same ten seconds.

Your mind still lingers on what he’d meant by ‘exactly’, you struggle to understand why he’d have any particular skin in this game any more. He’d already trounced David last weekend, maybe you were mistaken, but you can’t help but feel this new rouse is too much effort for a guy who seemingly didn’t care to acknowledge you properly for the first year you knew him… still, no matter how much you hated the idea of wasting a night in David’s company, or even worse, wasting Hangman’s limited down time before he was shipped off somewhere again, the idea of spending it with the aviator of your affections, watching him thoroughly wipe that condescending smile off of David’s face, is fast growing on you.

Softly you let out a breath you didn’t realise you’d been holding until now.

“Are you sure?” You ask softly, falling victim again to your need for this man to just like you. Hangman scoffs and you hear what sounds like keys.

“About the kisses? Absolutely.” He replies too fast for it to not have been slightly planned, and you can imagine his smirk now. You realise you shouldn’t count yourself short, a month ago you’d never been on the receiving end of one of his infuriating Cheshire grins, but these days it seemed to be the only expression he wore around you.

You roll your eyes and huff.

“You should be so lucky.” You say with absolutely no conviction.

“For my smokin’ hot girlfriend to fawn over me every time I humiliate her piece of shit ex-boyfriend for her? I’d agree. I would be very lucky, sweetheart.” Hangman’s voice is surprisingly effective down a crackly phone line, deeper and with an inflection you aren’t sure of. As if he knew something you didn’t. You find yourself surprised by how much it doesn’t annoy you, how much it instead makes you want to jump his bones here and now. You were much too aware that half your desire for Hangman to look at you twice was because you had a crush the size of his ego, but you’d become so used to his cold treatment of you for so long, that feeling a sliver of arousal shoot through you is almost strange.

“I really like mini golf.” You tell him abruptly, desperate to distract yourself from that line of thought. “In my hometown, we had this incredible putt-putt place, it was honestly plucked from Disneyland or something. It was that cool…” you ramble on, reminiscing about the good ol’ local Holey-Moley.

“Did you go a lot?” Hangman asks, his voice unreadable. You let out a sad little laugh and shake your head even though he can’t see you.

“Nah. I remember I always wanted to go for my birthday when I was a kid, but the cost was through the roof. When I got a bit older I guess… I guess I could have gone but, more importantly I’m not sure it’s so fun to go mini-golfing alone.” You chortle at the thought, but part of you wishes you’d done it, at least once.

“Mmh. No smoking girlfriend to kiss your cheek when you win.” Hangman says, and you can’t help yourself, you laugh loud and unabashedly. You think you can hear him chuckle too, but it could have been peaking static for all you know.

“Golf is at six. Send me your address and I’ll pick you up at ten to, alright?” Hangman tells you, his voice not exactly soft, but not demanding like it had been earlier either. You hum, but before you hang up you call out.

“Wait, Jake?” You hear shuffling, like perhaps he hadn’t heard you.

“Yeah?”

You pause, unsure of exactly how to say what you want to, and choose to settle on the simplest way.

“Thanks. David sucks.” You tell him gratefully. You hear silence for a moment before his voice comes back again.

“Don’t mention it. We hate that guy.”

—

As it turns out, you didn’t need to worry much about seeing David or him making you feel any type of way. It’s only when you and Jake have settled at the venue’s bar and ordered a round that his phone buzzes sharply and makes the blond frown down at the screen in front of him, before he pockets it again.

You watch him take a hefty swig, and still frowning, he fixes you in his gaze, making your stomach involuntarily flutter.

“David and Yas aren’t coming.” He states. You struggle to read his tone, though you think he might sound a little annoyed, and the fluttering in your stomach immediately ceases.

“Oh.” You say dumbly, blinking rapidly down at your hands, and then to your drink. You also take a big sip, now avoiding your companion’s eyes as you let the disappointment roll through you.

After a few moments you feel a large hand land on your back, between your shoulder blades, and you glance over to eye it’s owner, who seems to be doing his best version of apologetic while rubbing his hand in soothing motions up and down over your sweater.

“Hey, that’s a good thing isn’t it? We hate that guy,” Jake asks, his eyes flicking back and forth over your face, but you aren’t sure what he’s looking for. You hum, noncommittal, and down another large mouthful of your cocktail, missing the way Jake’s lips turn downward at your reaction.

All too soon his big hand is gone from your back, and you almost cringe at how much you miss not just the warmth, but the feeling of his touch.

“I’ll take you home, if you want me to,” he says, tone unreadable to you now, and you can’t help but look up at him again. Jake stares back, his brow furrowed, but he bows his head a little to the side when you meet his gaze, now avoiding you.

“I just thought…” he trails off, shutting his mouth sharply, the muscles in his jaw clenching as he stares over your shoulder.

You feel the urge to comfort him then, as you realise this whole mess is Hangman’s version of doing a nice thing for you. It occurs to you then that he’s aware of how obvious this fact must be to you in the light of things not going to plan, and almost want to laugh at the idea of him feeling shy about how much he’s really willing to do for people he likes. It makes some sense, considering you’ve seen how little he’ll do for those he seemingly doesn’t.

You do crack a smile at the thought of him trying to hide how much he cares, and make a note to watch for it in the future.

“What? That you’d get away from being destroyed by my slice?” you ask, pushing off the bar with a combative smirk. Your words immediately draw his attention again, and almost like you’ve uttered the magic phrase, his whole demeanour switches up. He’s smirking now, in that infuriating way that makes it seem as if he knows something you don’t, and where you’ve stopped leaning, he takes it up, resting his palm flat on the bar so that his bicep flexes impossibly taut. Briefly the ridiculously bulging muscle draws your eye, and you can’t help but ogle him slightly, from his arm up to his neck and by the time you reach his eyes, you know you’ve been caught.

Jake’s smirk is almost mean with how wide it is, and you nearly jump when he leans in to you slightly, cocking his head derisively.

“Honey, I would love to be destroyed by your slice,” he tells you like it’s a joke you clearly don’t get. He knows he has your attention now, and he makes a show of finishing off his beer, taking the opportunity to get even closer to you when he places his empty bottle down, his eyes purposefully looking you over. You think he must enjoy how wound up he makes women, and considering you told him the last time you saw him that he made you hot and bothered, he appears to be pulling out all the stops. You take a deep breath, and quickly finish your own drink, enjoying the way he dares his hand back to your body, once more at your back, but this time he drops it lower, easily turning you so you can grab your clubs and begin putting.

“I have to warn you though,” he continues, never moving too far from the spot right behind you, even though the venue is packed full. “I’m known to be a bad sport about these things. Too competitive,” his voice holds an element of humour still, but it’s receded enough that you can hear the real hesitation in it. It makes you wonder if he’s had dates in the past go poorly because of something similar. The idea makes you scrunch your nose as you approach the first putting course.

When you turn around to reply, Jake seems just as taken aback as you at your sudden proximity, not entirely unfamiliar, though it feels different from the last time against the pool table given that his hand still lingers at your back, now seemingly holding you together. You stare at one another for a moment before you remember what you were going to say, hesitating for a few seconds longer before committing to telling him.

“I like that– about you, I mean,” you manage to say without stuttering, your confidence growing some when he can’t seem to stop a small frown appearing between his brows at your words. “I like how confident you are… you don’t have much doubt about your ability, and…” you trail off a little as he meets your gaze, looking almost bewildered that you would be so open or honest about such a thing. It almost makes you laugh again at this silly man and the games he likes to play, never really saying what he means.

“I think it’s kinda hot when you’re good at things, so I really won’t really mind if you’re a poor sport about it…” you admit, laughing a little awkwardly at yourself. Jake seems to blink back to life then, like you’d hit his hard reset button, and his smirk somewhat returns, though it glimmers between a proper smile and his usual cheshire like amusement.

“I guess you can’t lose then, huh?” he purrs. “Also means it won’t matter if I help you like last time.”

You nearly jump when his grip on you tightens briefly, but he quickly brings both his hands to your hips, and turns you back away from him. He gives your waist another squeeze before his hands move to slip down your forearms and then over your own, his grip firm and unbelievably arousing to you. You actually have to force yourself to take in air normally and not let your eyes roll back slightly when he kicks your feet further apart, and his little chuckle lets you know he knows exactly what he’s doing.

“This better be the best shot of all time, Hangman, cause I actually know what I’m doing this time,” you warn weakly, even as he gently pulls your arms back and helps you swing, stunning you slightly when your ball sinks an immediate hole in one on a three par course. You can’t help but pull away from his hold so you can look up at him in surprised shock. Jake simply lifts an eyebrow and returns your gaze, his chest seemingly puffing a little when you settle back against him. He chuckles when he uses you to sink another perfect shot of his own, and you hum, murmuring a quiet ‘well done’.

“And to think I coulda been doing this months ago…” he says after you’ve both moved to the next course, and he’s gotten comfortable once more with his arms draped around you like his only function is to be a very smug blanket.

“I have to say, most men don’t get away with wasting so much of my time,” you say with so much faux haughtiness you almost apologise. Luckily for you, Jake appears to enjoy it when you’re mean, this time one of his arms circles your waist, the other lazily taking a shot that sinks itself just as quickly as the last.

You’re suddenly glad that you’re not playing him properly, for as good as you’d become from practice, you know for a fact you’ll never be this good.

“Don’t want you lowering your standards just for little ol’ me, honey.” Jake says right by your ear, forcing you to repress a shiver.

“Most men also don’t ignore me for the better part of a year, so I guess you’re special,” you reply quickly, though immediately regret it when you feel him shift, perhaps a little uncomfortably.

He doesn’t speak again until after he’s placed his own ball down and is lining up his shot. When he swings it doesn’t go right in, making you look over your shoulder at him only to find his eyes barely focused on the task at hand. He doesn’t even seem to realise he’s got another shot to take, and so this time when you pull away from you, you take his hand, gaining his attention again as you lead him over to where his neon green ball waits.

You see him look between it and the hole a few feet off, but before he can move gain, you tuck yourself back into his chest, where he at last relaxes, though you feel the movement of him swallowing thickly just before he begins lining himself up.

“I didn’t want you to not like me…” he says softly, so quiet you almost miss it.

“You thought I wouldn’t like you if I talked to you?” you say questioningly, leaning up to look at him just as your own words make you realise his exact mindset. You stare at one another for a few moments, before Jake clears his throat, and looks away, taking his second shot and finishing above par even as you keep staring at him.

“What happened to all that confidence, huh? How could I not like you?” you ask, nudging him a little. His eyes snap to yours, and a funny little smirk crosses his features.

“You’re so honest,” he comments instead of answering you.

“Maybe if we’d been on speaking terms for more than two hours total you might have known that,” you roll your eyes. Jake ignores your snark and tightens his hold around your waist.

“Seems you're winning,” he says, guiding you almost blindly toward the next hole, and positioning you back between his arms. “Looks like I can’t lose either.”

#jake seresin #jake seresin x reader #jake 'hangman' seresin #jake 'hangman' seresin x reader #hangman x reader #jake 'hangman' seresin fanfic #jake hangman seresin x reader #top gun fanfiction #top gun maverick

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jessicas-pi · 9 months

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ONE person asked and so now i'm doing it again: more incorrect quotes, time heals edition (part 1 cause there's gonna be more)

Obi-Wan: Where’s Ahsoka? Anakin: Doing stuff. Obi-Wan: I don’t like the sound of that. Where’s Sabine? Anakin: Trying to stop Ahsoka from doing the stuff. Obi-Wan: And Jacen? Anakin: Trying to stop Sabine from stopping Ahsoka from doing the stuff. Obi-Wan: I see. And what are you doing here, Anakin? Anakin: I’m supposed to stop you from stopping Jacen from stopping Sabine from stopping Ahsoka from doing the stuff.

---

*Everyone is giving advice to Obi-Wan* Sabine: It's okay to ask for help. Ahsoka: You're not a burden. Anakin: Murder is okay. Jacen: Your feelings matter.

---

Zhaya: I don’t go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me first.

---

Store Worker: Would a “Sabine” please come to the front desk? Sabine, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem? Store Worker, pointing to Ahsoka and Jacen: I believe they belong to you? Ahsoka and Jacen, simultaneously: We got lost. Sabine: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me—

---

*At 79s* Sabine: Ladies do not start fights BUT THEY CAN FINISH THEM.

---

[Sabine, running from a rock monster] Anakin, through the comm: You're just going to have to kill it. Sabine: Kill it? Well, I'm open to any suggestions. Anakin: Go for the eyes! Sabine: He doesn't have any eyes, Anakin! Anakin: Go for the mouth, then, the throat, his vulnerable spots! Sabine: IT'S A ROCK! IT DOESN'T HAVE ANY VULNERABLE SPOTS! Zhaya, grabbing the comm from Anakin: I know! You construct a weapon. Look around, can you form some sort of rudimentary lathe?

---

Sabine, trying to avoid explaining how she knows the future: Don't ask me what I'm talking about. I don't know, okay? I'm just the vessel. The message has been gifted. I've moved on.

---

Cody: What's wrong with you? Sabine: Off the top of my head, I'd say low self-esteem, a lack of maternal affection, and a genetic predisposition for anxiety and depression.

---

Satine: Guys, I have a question. Bo-Katan: kys <3 Satine, deadpan: I love you too. Sabine: Ah, yes. Siblings.

---

Mace: I hope you have an explanation for this. Jacen: We have three actually. Ahsoka: Pick your favorite.

---

Sabine: Am I too late for Obi-Wan’s panic attack? [Obi-Wan hides his face in despair] Sabine: Apparently not!

---

Sabine: Could you be any more annoying? Shipper: Yes.

---

Anakin: Small creatures are much more vicious because they have a smaller body to bottle up all their emotions. Jacen: Ridiculous. Give me some examples. Obi-Wan: Wasps? Sabine: Terriers? Anakin: Ahsoka.

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Sabine: Why is there blood everywhere? Bo-Katan: I may have aggressively poked someone with a knife. Sabine: You stabbed someone?! Bo-Katan: No, no. I aggressively poked someone with a knife.

---

Jacen: Here’s a fun Life Day idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it. Mace: Jacen... no. Ashoka: Mistlefoe! Mace: Please stop encouraging him. Jacen and Ahsoka, together: SOMEONE'S HALLS ARE GETTING DECKED!

---

Anakin: I'm not creepy. Anakin: I'm petty. Anakin: There's a difference, ya' know.

---

Kidnapper: I have one of your kids. Obi-Wan: Which one? I have four. Kidnapper: The loud, annoying, rowdy one who never shuts up. Obi-Wan: Which one? I have four. Anakin, distantly: HEY!!!

---

Sabine: What’s it like being tall? Sabine: Is it nice? Sabine: Can you reach comfortably for the cupboards? Anakin: We live in constant fear of the short ones who, in my experience, will climb 4 chairs, 2 boxes, a small coffee table and 6 oddly placed stools to get what they want. Ahsoka: It was one time!

---

Wyvern: Are you nuts? Shipper: Jury's out.

---

Jacen: I like to think of myself as a semi responsible teenager here. Sabine: Ahsoka is 70% of your impulse control and you know this Jacen. Ahsoka: I feel like Jacen is the more responsible one of us two though. Jacen: We are both 70% of each others' impulse control. Ahsoka: Just two lil beasts in pinwheel hats spinning on the merry-go-round at dangerous velocities, holding each other’s hands so the other doesn’t fall off.

----

and last but not least,

Ezra: What’s up? I’m back. Sabine: I literally saw you die. You died. You were dead Ezra: Death is a social construct.

#the time heals 'verse #incorrect quotes #obi wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #ahsoka tano #sabine wren #commander cody #jacen syndulla #mace windu #satine kryze #bo katan kryze #ezra bridger

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makerofmadness · 9 months

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NEW AND IMPROVED: incorrect FNAF quotes

Uh just forget all the previous posts I can't remember half the quotes I made and also some of them are outdated lore-wise or headcanon-wise so time for a grand reopening of the series(?). May have done some of these quotes exactly the same in the past but heck if I know-

Contains: Headcanons, spoilers for Ruin, hopefully no big mistakes/words I forgot to replace

Speaking of headcanons: I hc that the "classic fnaf" era night guards are all the fnaf 4 bullies. So Michael, Fritz, Jeremy, and the last one is entirely an OC (whom I had described in my old quotes posts but I've renamed her now 'Cus I accidentally gave her the same name as a BATIM character whoops-): Susanna "Susie" Hudson. She's the FNAF 3 guard.

as was before, I get these quotes from the perchance generator and just insert the characters in manually.

quotes under the cut:

Gregory (seeing that one unexplained room): Is… Is that meant to be on fire? Roxanne Wolf: No… not really. Gregory: Are you going to do something about it? Roxanne Wolf: Hm… nah.

Michael Afton: Sometimes I wonder if I’m hearing voices. Michael Afton: Then I remember that’s the last bit of sanity I have trying to get me to fall asleep at a reasonable time.

Mangle: You know the sound a fork makes in the garbage disposal? That's the sound that my brain makes all the time.

Susanna Hudson: I’m genuinely surprised you haven’t gotten arrested, let alone gotten a felony yet. Fritz Smith: Nat 20 Charisma. Susanna Hudson: That is NOT how that works-

Golden Freddy: If karma doesn't hit you, I fucking will. -

Mangle: I don’t care what anyone thinks about me. Withered Foxy: Ok. Mangle: Wait, why such a muted reaction? Did that not sound cool?

Mangle: Welcome to Fucking Applebees, do you want apples or bees? Jeremy Fitzgerald: Bees? Mangle: HE HAS SELECTED THE BEES! Jeremy Fitzgerald: Wait- *Toy Chica approaches, shaking a jar of bees menacingly* ('Twas but an allegory for the Bite of 87-)

Fritz Smith: I wasn’t that drunk. Jeremy Fitzgerald: You colored my face with a highlighter because you said I was important. Fritz Smith: BECAUSE YOU ARE! -

The Puppet: Bonnie, are you drinking… drinking hydrogen peroxide?! Toy Bonnie: It says H2O2! That means it’s the sequel to water! -

Michael Afton: I'm not a morning person. I'm barely even a person.

Circus Baby: Pardon me, but it sounds like you’re questioning my authority! Funtime Foxy: Not at all, Baby. Merely your primitive methods.

Crying Child (FNAF 4), after having a nosebleed: Welp. Time to wash the blood off my hands.

Gregory: Can we go to a haunted house? Vanessa: What’s wrong with the one we live in? Gregory: Wh-what? Vanessa: Goodnight, Gregory.

Toy Bonnie: Here is my wall of inspirational people. Withered Bonnie: Is that a picture of you? Toy Bonnie: Yes, I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.

The Mimic: I have one of your friends. Glamrock Freddy: Which one? I have seven. The Mimic: The loud, annoying, rowdy one who never shuts up. Glamrock Freddy: Which one? I have seven. Roxanne Wolf, distantly: HEY!!!

Michael Afton: What’s the status up here? Fritz Smith: Fucked up, about to die, Jeremy's a nerd. The usual.

Roxanne Wolf: You're pathetic! Gregory: You're pathetic-er! Vanny: You're both losers.

*Comments under an image of a really hot knife cutting bread* Molten Freddy: Imagine stabbing someone with this knife. Helpy: It would instantly cauterize the wound, so the person wouldn't bleed, so it's not very useful. Rockstar Chica: if you want information it is Music Man: why would you STAB a person when you can have TOAST?

Ennard: I’ve never been in a snowball fight before. I don’t know the rules. Michael Afton: What? Ennard: Is there a point system, or is it to the death?

*Michael Afton rushes by with an armful of water bottles* Funtime Chica: What's going on? Rockstar Foxy: Mike wouldn't drink water. Funtime Chica: …And? Rockstar Foxy: And I asked him how fast he could chug an entire bottle. Michael Afton, loudly: 16 OUNCES IN TEN SECONDS, BITCHES!

Roxanne Wolf: Sometimes I talk to myself for no reason. Roxanne Wolf: Me too!

Montgomery Gator: Do you think different paints have different tastes? Glamrock Chica: They do. Glamrock Freddy: …Why did you say that with such certainty?

William Afton: You might not know this, Henry, but I am a flawed person. Henry Emily: I do know that.

William Afton: I could kill you if I wanted. Michael Afton: Yeah? So could any other human being. So could a dog. So could a dedicated duck. You aren't special.

Dee Dee: If I can't cause tiny bits of chaos every day, I think my body will shut down.

Funtime Freddy: I have one brain cell and it bounces around in my skull like a windows screen saver. Funtime Freddy: When it hits a corner perfect, I’m allowed one good idea.

Cassie: You're ignoring all your problems. Eclipse: I know. Cassie: You also know it's an unhealthy coping mechanism? Eclipse: I'm ignoring that fact as well. Cassie:

Withered Foxy: What do people in relationships even do? Toy Freddy: Care about someone with your whole heart and dedicate your life to making them happy. Withered Foxy: Okay. Didn't ask. Toy Chica: Asks question Toy Chica: "Didn't ask" Withered Foxy: Thanks for the play by play, Captain Fuck.

Withered Foxy: BB? What are you doing here? Balloon Boy, standing in the office: My best.

The Squad: *walking around the Pizzaplex* Moon: Hey, have any of you guys seen Chica? She's been gone for a while.. Vanessa: Eh, nope. Montgomery Gator: No, I haven’t… Roxanne Wolf: Probably ran off to get pizza or something. Glamrock Chica: Hey. Moon: Ooh, there you are- Vanessa: What the fu- Roxanne Wolf: I- where were you?! Glamrock Chica: Walking right behind you guys.

Funtime Freddy: Bon-Bon! Eggs Benedict got that thing on the control panel working! Bon-Bon: Wow! That looks pretty impressive. Funtime Freddy: Yeah! Bon-Bon: Any idea what it does? Funtime Freddy: Not a clue.

Gregory: I just learned a way to get stuff on the cheap. Steal it!

Cassie: You have to apologize to Roxy! Gregory: Fine! Gregory: Unfuck you, or whatever!

Michael Afton: Rockstar Bonnie just said "I have an appetite for destruction" and then he reached down and untied my shoe.

Gregory: School sucks. Vanessa: I know, but you have to do it so you can get a job. Gregory: What are jobs like? Vanessa: They suck.

The Mimic: I am literally evil incarnate. The Mimic: I’m not actually, I just enjoy being evil. The Mimic: Which I think actually makes it even more evil because I’m making a conscious effort.

William Afton: Something’s off. Henry Emily: Maybe you’ve finally developed human emotions and feel bad for hurting people. William Afton: No, but that’s funny.

Montgomery Gator: Do you ever think? Because I do not.

Gregory: What language do they speak at the center of the earth? Gregory: Core-ean Glamrock Freddy: The center of the earth is arond 5430 degrees Celsius! Nobody is going to live there so they don’t need a language! Vanessa: Core-ean.

Toy Bonnie: I don’t know the first thing about clothes. Pretty much all I can do is look at something and tell you if it’s clothes or not. This chair? Not clothes.

Roxanne Wolf: How would you like your hair cut? Montgomery Gator: Preferably with scissors, but a sword could be badass.

Withered Chica, looking at her reflection: Now, that's rubbish. Who's that supposed to be? Toy Chica: Well, that's you. Withered Chica: Me?! Is that what I look like? Toy Chica You don't know? Withered Chica: Busy day.

Withered Bonnie, to Toy Bonnie: All right, let’s tell each other a secret about ourselves. I’m going to go first– I hate you.

Jeremy Fitzgerald: We need to distract these guys. Fritz Smith: Leave it to me. Fritz Smith: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss. Toy Freddy & Toy Bonnie: *immediately begin arguing*

Susanna Hudson: Coca Cola can remove rust from metal, imagine what it’s doing to your body. Fritz Smith: Pfff, getting rid of the rust, idiot. Susanna Hudson: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS! Michael Afton: Hmm… I've been drinking soda and my body's rust free… not sure where you're getting your facts from…

Circus Baby: What’s wrong? You look 10 seconds away from ripping someone’s throat out. Ballora: Fucking Freddy and Foxy were trying to invoke one of the minor gods again last night. I didn't get an ounce of sleep, thanks to their bloody chanting.

Circus Baby: All in all, a 100 successful trip. Funtime Freddy: But we lost Bon-Bon. Circus Baby: All in all, a 100 successful trip!

(FNAF humans be like:)

Susanna Hudson: *fills up bottle and drinks from that* Vanessa: *brought 4 bottles of water so this wouldn’t happen* Cassie: *drinks straight from the tap* Crying Child: *dehydrates* Gregory: *drinks from the puddle of water on the floor* Michael Afton: *licks the tap, doesn’t even need a drink*

Cassie: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I’ll wait. Gregory: You and me! Cassie: *tearing up* Ok.

(we can pretend the ending never happened just a bit-)

Chica: Why's it called an oven when you of in the cold food and you of out hot eat the food? Freddy: …What???

Gregory, holding a scooter: Vanessa! Can I go outside and play with this? Vanessa Sure, whatever. I'm not your parent, okay? Gregory, running outside: Thanks Vanessa! Vanessa, running out after him and screaming: NOT ON THE STREET! STAY AWAY!

Jeremy Fitzgerald: Look, last night was a mistake. Fritz Smith: A sexy mistake. Jeremy Fitzgerald: No, just a regular mistake.

Mangle: Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, and wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. Toy Freddy: That's deep. Toy Bonnie: That means that ketchup is a smoothie. Toy Freddy: That's deeper. The Puppet: …You guys are idiots.

RWQFSFASXC: I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.

Withered Chica: You know, when I first met you I thought you were a real bitch. Toy Chica: What changed your mind? Withered Chica: Oh, I still think you're a bitch. I've just grown to like that about you.

Freddy: Don't break someone's heart, they only have one. Golden Freddy: Break one of their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

*1987's game of Among Us in real life* Jeremy Fitzgerald: I believe Fritz is innocent, I was with them the whole time. Mr. Afton, what were you doing? William Afton: Oh, I was just murdering… I mean, nothing!

Toy Bonnie: Is the pink panther a lion? Withered Bonnie: Say that again but slower. Toy Bonnie: I don’t get it. Withered Bonnie: He’s a PANTHER. Toy Bonnie: Is that a type of lion? Withered Bonnie: No, it’s a fucking panther. Toy Bonnie: *googles panther* They aren't pink? Withered Bonnie: AND LIONS ARE?!

Henry Emily: Do you have any skeletons in your closet? William Afton: Literally or figuratively? Henry Emily: I have to specify?

Bonnie: Yesterday, I watched Foxy try to eat a decorative rock from the night guard's potted plant. The Puppet caught him, and told him that he can't eat rocks. Chica started whining something about no food being in the house before walking away.

Susanna Hudson: I spy with my little eye something that begins with the letter “s”. Michael Afton: *looks over at Fritz Smith and Jeremy Fitzgerald* Michael Afton: Is it “sexual tension”?

Gregory, after acquiring the Fazer-blaster: The ‘how the fucks’ and 'why are you so dumbs’ don’t matter. All that matters is that I have a new gun.

*after discussing the plan to burn down Fazbear's Fright* Susanna Hudson: Does anyone have any questions? Jeremy Fitzgerald: Is this legal? Susanna Hudson: Does anyone have any relevant questions?

Dee Dee: Don’t worry, I have a permit. Old Man Consequences: …This just says “I can do what I want”.

Fritz Smith: You look good in that hoodie. Jeremy Fitzgerald: You know where else I'd look good? Fritz Smith, zero hesitation: My bed. Jeremy Fitzgerald, at the same time: By your side- wait, what?

Helpi: Fun Fact! The average person will walk by 36 murderers in their lifetime. Cassie: I like how this is a "fun" fact. MXES: It's fun because they didn't decide to murder you.

Susanna Hudson: Just be careful, Mike! Michael Afton: heading out the door I'm always careful, Susie! Michael Afton: It's everything around me that's careless.

The Puppet: We are not mad. We are just disappointed. Golden Freddy: No, we are mad. The Puppet: Yes. We are. We are livid. But we are going to let this one slide. Golden Freddy: No, we’re not! The Puppet: I am not a mind reader, Cassidy!

Cassie: Do you take constructive criticism? Helpi: No, only cash or credit.

Roxanne Wolf: I typed "bitch" into my GPS and guess what? I'm in your driveway. Gregory: Roxanne Wolf: Vroom vroom, come out already.

Phone Guy: *Answers phone* Hello? Fritz Smith: It's Fritz Smith. Phone Guy: What did he do this time? Fritz Smith: No, it's me, phone guy. It's actually me. Phone Guy: What did you do this time?

Vanessa: I don’t think the therapist is supposed to say ‘wow’ that many times during their first session with a client, but here we are.

Golden Freddy, referring to the Fazbear Gang(tm): Those guys are dorks. The Puppet: Yes, but they’re my dorks.

Glamrock Chica: Are you busy? Montgomery Gator: No. Glamrock Chica: Want to do something? Montgomery Gator: Why would you try to ruin this for me?

Susanna Hudson: Go to hell! Springtrap: Oh! I’ve been there, thank you. I found it quite lovely.

Elizabeth Afton: When was the last time you cried? Crying Child: Uh 15 minutes ago, why?? Elizabeth Afton: really? That recent? Crying Child: Yeah *voice crack* is that an issue? starts crying again

JJ: So I can either do something dumb that could very well get me injured or I can listen to the Puppet and not do the thing, JJ: Well there’s a clear right answer here. JJ: *proceeds to throw five packs of mentos into a barrel full of diet coke*

Ennard: You have an impressive pain tolerance. Michael Afton: Thanks, it's the trauma.

Sun, dashing into the room: WHY AREN’T THE DISHES IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER?! Vanessa: …What does that even mean?!

Susanna Hudson, toward Michael Afton: Wow, left-handed AND British? You really are an illusion.

Freddy: We’re kind of missing something guys. Bonnie: Cohesion? Chica: Teamwork? Foxy: A general sense of what we’re doing? Golden Freddy: And the Puppet is not here. Chica: Oh, and that, yeah.

Michael Afton: Ennard, can you help me? All of my clothes keep disappearing for some reason. Ennard, wearing a hoodie that's 5 times bigger than their size: Spooky.

Roxanne Wolf: Tired of just deserving better. Gonna start taking it by force.

Scraptrap: *dies* Helpy: Timer starts now! When is he coming back? I say two months! Music Man: Bullshit. One month. Lefty: Nah, half a month. Rockstar Foxy, sobbing: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? SOMEONE JUST DIED! Mr. Hippo, scratching chin in thought: One week.

Michael Afton: I’ve been sleeping so little the past few nights that when I go to the alarm app, I click on the “power nap” button. I don’t set up alarms, I set up timers, Helpy.

Roxanne Wolf: Let’s not Gregory this into a worse situation than it already is. Gregory: Did you just use my name as a verb?

Scrap Baby: Tommorrow's garbage day. Molten Freddy: I can't believe they made a whole day dedicated to you.

Glamrock Freddy: *lifting weights* Montgomery Gator: Wow… He's so intense! Glamrock Chica: I wonder what drives him. Glamrock Freddy, internally: (Oh I am going to be SO good at giving hugs.)

Fritz Smith: The greatest trick the devil ever played was getting me banned from an all you can eat pizza buffet. Jeremy Fitzgerald: Why’d you get banned? Fritz Smith: Touched the bear. Jeremy Fitzgerald: … What bear? Fritz Smith: Feddy Fazbear

#Fnaf #incorrect quotes #incorrect fnaf quotes #ruin spoilers #security breach ruin spoilers #fnaf ruin spoilers #sb ruin spoilers #fnaf sb ruin spoilers #Jerefritz #I would've made this even longer but at the last one tumblr reloaded itself (thankfully the draft saved though so I didn't lose anything)#And that plus it starting to kinda lag I think makes me think that tumblr's trying to tell me to stop so yeah #Hope everyone enjoys. Will probably do more in the future.#fnaf oc #<- kinda.

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lieutenantfloyd · 2 years

Text

SFW relationship headcanons ; R.Floyd

requested?: yes

Warnings: brief mention of creepy men, one use of the word wh*re.

Words: 1836

note: I have received many requests for Bob and I could not be happier. The resounding sentiment was, quote: “ Literally anything and everything for Bob”. Ask and you shall receive.

♫ My Heart Belongs To Only You by Bobby Vinton

a- asking (Who's the first person to confess and how does it happen?)

Bob would hope that you'd confess to him first. He'd drop small hints and try to spend more time with you. If you weren't taking the hint, however, it'd take him a few weeks until he mustered up the courage to ask you out. He'll have the fieriest blush on his cheeks while he stumbles over his words.

B - Butterflies (How they act when they're nervous.)

This lovely guy is always a little nervous. It's part of his charm. When it comes to you he's shaking in his boots. The first time you kissed him you practically had to hold him up so he wouldn't faint.

c- cuddles (What is their favorite cuddling position? Do they like physical touch?)

There are few things in life Bob loves more than physical touch with his S/O. His favorite thing is to come home and at the end of a long day and drag you to the nearest soft surface and just hold you. In moments where he's feeling more vulnerable he'd pull you into bed and have you face him. Neither of you would talk much, instead just enjoying each other's company.

d- domesticity (Are they the type to settle down with you? Are they willing to help with chores? What is your daily routine with them?)

Robert's biggest goal in life is to have the full 1950s nuclear family. A white picket fence, 2/3 kids, housewife, etc. He loves the thought of being the "man of the house" and strives to have the person(s) he loves most in this world see him as a strong, capable, and dependable man.

e- encouragement (Do they encourage you to achieve your goals? If so, how do they support you?)

He's you're #1 cheerleader. He'll support you in absolutely any way he can.

f- favorite thing(s) about you (What are their favorite personality traits/physical features about you?)

He loves your assertiveness and your confidence. Not only does he find those qualities extremely hot, but he deeply admires them as well.

As for physical features, I picture Bob being attracted to more mid/plus size girls. Something about the more dramatic curves of a bigger body gets him all worked up. Bonus points of you carry your weight in your stomach and/or hips/legs.

g- goofiness (Do they like to make you laugh? How often do they joke around with you?)

Bob is the funniest person you know. Often times unintentionally. He knows he can come across as a little goofy but seeing you smile because of him squashed any insecurities he might have had about that.

h- honesty (Would they lie to you? How much do they share with you?)

One of two things happens if Bob tries to lie. 1: He mumbles short replies under his breath and will completely avoid looking at you. The guilt eats at him and he tells you the truth by the end of the night. 2: he'll produce an absolute word vomit, usually revealing the truth, his ears turn red and he scurries away.

Basically, he's the worst liar in the world.

i- impression (What was their first impression of you? Was it positive or negative?)

It doesn't take much to catch his eye. A cheery disposition, a pretty laugh, a tea length dress, a nice set of curls, or even just holding your own against some rowdy servicemen and he's falling for you.

He'll absentmindedly watch you from a distance, hoping slightly that you'll notice him too.

j- jealousy (Are they the type of person to get jealous? If so, how do they react to being jealous?)

Robert is not jealous in the typical sense. He deals with more than his fair share of insecurities, and this is only heightened when someone else is obviously interested in you.

Jealously is hard to spot in Bob as his demeanor closely mirrors his attitude when he's tired or done socializing. His hand will drop from your hips and he becomes even more quiet. His jaw will tighten as he absentmindedly plays with the label on his beer. It isn't until you pull him away and start heading home that you notice the look in his eyes. Tears threaten to spill as anger, self doubt, and disappointment swirls just beneath the surface of his baby blues. That night he'll need some extra kisses and reassurance to get back to his normal self.

k- kissing (Where do they like to kiss you? How frequently do they like to kiss?)

Once you're official, Bob will not hesitate to smother you in kisses. He will kiss you anywhere he can. He'll wrap his arm around your waist, pulling you close while bringing your hands to his lips or dipping down to kiss your cheek. (ever the gentleman)

l- love language (What's their love language?)

All of them. Seriously.

Give him your undivided love and attention and he's trying to guess your ring size then and there.

m- marriage (Do they want to marry you eventually? Who proposes to who?)

Expanding on letter D a bit, Robert really craves the intimacy that comes with a lifelong commitment to love. As for a proposal, He (ever the romantic) will start planning his perfect proposal well over a year in advance, only to just blurt the question out at a random moment he feels particularly struck by how much he loves you. If this happens, he'll panic, try to back track, say he wasn't serious, etc.

If your answer is yes, pull him into one of those deep "my husband is home from war" kisses and he will short circuit. He will still require your full verbal confirmation to his proposal before he relaxes and celebrates. The second you say yes, he wraps you I the tightest hug imaginable and buries his face in the crook of your neck. Expect him to mumble something along the lines of "oh my god, this is really happening." He might even let (more than) a few tears slip out.

Overall, 10/10 experience.

n- nicknames (What do they call you? What do you call them?)

For you: Darling, doll, Honey, Angel, dove, sweetheart. For him: Bobby, honeybug, pumpkin, deary, my darling husband...

o- openness (How much do they tell you about themselves? Do they reveal everything at once or gradually throughout the relationship?)

If he's comfortable, he's an open book. You could ask him anything and he'll answer it 100% honestly. By the time you're married, there's almost nothing left to love about him :)

p- PDA (Are they affectionate in public or do they prefer to keep your kisses behind closed doors? Are they the type to brag about their SO?)

He doesn't mind PDA especially after a few drinks, but you'll have to be the aggressor. Dear Bobby loves a woman that will take control. So much as ghost your fingertips over his leg and he's flushed a deep crimson and sweating like a whore in church.

The most he'll do (sober) is rest a hand on your hip or place a light peck to your cheek. If he's truly drunk, all bets are off. He'd strip you bare in the middle of The Hard Deck if you'd let him.

q- quality time (how do they like to spend time with you?)

Anything you want to do he'll do for you. If it's his choice, you two will stay in, cook dinner, and slow dance to a vinyl he picked out.

r- romance (Are they the romantic type? If so, how do they express their feelings?)

He's a romantic in every sense of the word. He leaves you handwritten notes every morning, brings you flowers when he comes back from a mission, etc.

s- security (How protective are they of you? If they are, how do they show this?)

People tend to underestimate him. It's not a rare occurrence for people to bully him and/or treat him like he doesn't even exist. It doesn't even phase him anymore. However, if someone disrespects you, his shy and calm demeanor goes out the window.

There was one occasion at the Hard Deck when he overheard some men making lewd comments about you. He set his beer down on the edge of the pool table before excusing himself and proceeding to all but lunge at the men. While he may have lost the fight, he damn sure proved his point.

t- turn-offs (What traits do they find unattractive?)

Rude, catty, judgmental, trying to force him out of his shell.

u- understanding (Are they good at sympathizing with your problems? Do they listen to you when you need to rant?)

Growing up shy, Bob became a great listener. He hears everything and files it away. He's also a natural problem solver. Come to him with any issues and it's fixed in a matter of minutes.

v- value (What do they value most about your relationship?)

Like Rooster, he values safety and security. The fact that you provide an environment where he can not only trust you wholly and entirely but come to you with anything without any fear of judgment is literally life changing for him.

w- wild card (A random headcanon about your relationship)

Bob loves to dance. He's also shockingly good at it. As introverted as he is, he'll come to you one day and practically beg you to take a swing dancing class with him. It soon becomes a Saturday night tradition for you two.

x- x-ray (How well are they able to read you?)

He struggles a bit at first, but over time he learns to read you like an open book. It's to the point where he can anticipate your needs. Top-tier husband material if you ask me.

y- yearning (How well do they cope when their SO isn't with them?)

To say Bob is clingy is quite the understatement. While he's away on missions he keeps a picture of you on his at all times. He's convinced it brings him good luck. This leads to him keeping your picture with him at ALL times. His confidence grows knowing that even though you might not be there physically, you are always right there with him. He even gets ragged on by his crew mates that bob with vs without you is like night and day. If he's away from you too long he struggles to even get out of bed.

Is the depth of his love for you slightly unhealthy? Probably. But when he said till death do us part, he was 1000% serious.

z- zappy (Are they fast-paced in a relationship? Or do they like to take things slow?)

He's been dreaming of settling down since he was in elementary school. He practically had to talk himself out of trying to convince you to get eloped on your second date. Like Rooster, he'll move as fast as you let him. He knows he can be a bit overzealous with his love at times, so don't be afraid to tell him to cool his jets (no pun intended).

#R.Floyd #robert floyd #bob floyd #robert bob floyd #bob floyd x reader #top gun x reader #top gun #top gun maverick

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ladychiy0 · 1 year

Text

Hi hi hi I'm just going to drop this quote of idv x sagau but mostly of it is Idv

WARRING : poor writing . The quote doesn't belong to me

Nightmare: You were hurt, what do you remember?

Naib: Just the door geta sirens

Nightmare: the match wasn't even close to an end, the hunter surrender themselves.

Naib: But I heard a siren?

Nightmare: That was Y/N.

Y/N: Sorry, I was nervous.

-----------------------------------------

Y/N: So... I think I'm in love with Jack.

aesop: Jack... as in The Ripper, as the hunter?

Y/N: Yeah. Thoughts?

aesop: And prayers.

-----------------------------------------

Y/N: the moon looks beautiful

Norton: yes but do you know what's more beautiful?

Y/N and Norton: *sigh* doughnuts

-----------------------------------------

Y/N: I'm kind of crushing on someone, but I'm worried about telling you who it is, because you're not going to like it.

Naib: Just rip the bandage off.

Y/N: It's the Photography.

aesop: Put the bandage back on.

-----------------------------------------

Leo: And what would you like to eat?

Yidhra (speaking to y/n and Yima telepathically):The souls of the innocents.

Y/N holding yima hand: 2 bagels

Yidhra: NO!

Y/n: 3 bagels.

-----------------------------------------

y/n: You need a hobby, Yidhra.

Yidhra: I have a hobby, Archer.

Y/n: How many times do I have to tell you that bullying Yami dose not counted?

-----------------------------------------

Robbie: hey y/n can you buy this for me?

Y/n: of course, dear

Martha: you can't buy him stuff!

Y/n: why? I'm his older sister figure, I can get him anything He wants.

Martha: we are playing monopoly for god's sake!

-----------------------------------------

Emma: Y/n help me !, I need you to hide me

Y/n: okay *hides Emma*

Emliy: why's Emma hiding behind y/n's cap?

Eli: she ate Naib's doughnuts

Naib: alright who ate my doughnuts !? Norton i know it was you!

Norton: wtf!! *Looks at emma behind y/n's cap*

-----------------------------------------

Luca: I think I'm coming down with something, I've been feeling really nauseous lately.

Emil: Maybe you're pregnant.

Luca:

Emil:

Luca: I don't know who's the bigger idiot right now, you for suggesting it or me because I just had a heart attack

-----------------------------------------

Ada: If I had a penny for every time you annoyed me today, I'd be able to buy a frappe.

Emil, staring intently: Uhm? I couldn't hear you over the sound of how pretty you are.

Y/n:

Y/n, looking over her arrows: You two do know that I'm here, right?

-----------------------------------------

Novelist: I have your daughter.

Y/n:

Y/n: I don't have a daughter.

Novelist: Then who's been singing baby sherk on a loop for 4 hours?

Y/N: Oh my god, you have memory.

Novelist, crying: Please come get her,I can't take it anymore

-----------------------------------------

Orpheus: I have one of your children.

Nightmare: Which one, I have many.

Orpheus: The loud, annoying, rowdy kid who never shuts up.

Nightmare: Which one, I have eight of those.

-----------------------------------------

Emil: *in a hospital bed with minor burns and a broken wrist*

Y/N: Every time I think I've seen the craziest, most moronic things a person could do, and you show up like ' hold my Capri Sun' and prove me wrong.

-----------------------------------------

*Leo venting about him and and his past wife*

Leo: I mean yeah man, relationships are tough sometimes. What about you and y/n?

Jack: me and my lady don't argue when she tells me to shut up I do.

-----------------------------------------

Hastur: hm y/n have you ever mad a deal with some god before you come into this game ?

Y/N about to snitch Joseph wig : tf ?? no ?

Hastur Ann Yidhra , Patricia Fiona in a corner watching y/n getting Chased by Joseph: ' hmm are we even sure the our sense are right? ' . ' if its then why all of us sensing this "divine auro" around her she may be lying ' . ' highly double it she is a bad lier ' . ' meybe a god blessed her ? ' . ' hmm but blessing her with what ? ' ....

Eli already down with there shit: can all of you stop this nonsense ? How can you even be sure the a god blessed her ? she may as will be blessed by a Damon for all we know it's just powerful auro around her.

Fiona: maybe jack ..?

Jack who was listening from the beginning: my lady, I might have have a split personality but trust me, me nor Ripper did any contract with her. And if lady y/n had mad a contract with a divine being I will be the first one to know about it

Patricia: what do you even know ab-

Jack: why would lady fiona even suggestion me now ? If there is one thing the is releted to my old days it's her.

-----------------------------------------

Y/N: *dropping her bow and arrows*

Hunters: phew

y/n: *pulls out a dagger*

Hunters: Oh no

Y/n: *opens a box with it*

Hunters: Phew.

Y/n: *pulls a flare gun out of the box*

Hunters: Oh no.

-----------------------------------------

Y/N: nightmare this place sucks :( why are the best poeple I always meet is the worst places

Nightmare: this isn't my problem and it's not like you can go anywhere

Y/N: I wish I can go somewhere else

*A black hole Spawns right behind her back*

Y/N& nightmare: wtf-

*The black hole eats y/n*

Nightmare: ....

The Mastermind: *who was going to reveal himself to her* well... her wish come true...?

- AFTER WHILE WITH Y/N -

Tavyat people: PLEASE YOUR GRACE STOP RUNNING

Y/N who is scared and confuse on why people calling her grace : STOP I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU GUYS WANT ME AND IM NOT "YOUR GRACE"

-----------------------------------------

Y/N: ....I miss home I miss my friends I miss Luce and Emil careless I miss everyone on the Monro.... expect nightmare she can die for I care ..... Thank you for letting me vent you . You guys are the best

Aranara: we are happy we can help The world mother !

Y/N:.....I still don't understand why call me the but thx :)

-----------------------------------------

Y/N: *trying to sneak around in liyut sees arlecchino X eyes the is just like her but hers red* ' SHE MUCH BE LIKE ME !!!! FORM MANOR but.....why did I meet ? DID THEY KIDNAP HER TO ?! not with me around hare >:'('

-the in golden house -

arlecchino: *who was with Pantalone to fine her* ' why do I feel being watch now ...? ' *turning around only to be face to face with y/n*

Y/N: .....im going to save you amigo.....

Pantalone: *who was looking for arlecchino to report about a wired symbol of a circular pattern with multiple black tentacles coiling outward* arlecchino we may have a lead we need to find her grace before-

* see no one out behind him * arlecchino....? *Looks around and only to find her being shoulder cared by Y/N and jumping off* ..... Your grace ...?

-TBC

( Some ✨ memes ✨ )

#identity v x reader #identity v x sagau #sagau #idv x reader #reader just wants to have fun

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nadineof30s · 1 year

Text

I Will Always Be With You

Peculiar Reader/Miss Peregrine (platonic)

Very angsty Miss P/reader prompt. Miss Peregrine sacrifices herself for her children.

Warnings: heavy angst, violence, major character death

Also, I have a mixture of the book/movie versions. Everyone is their book version apart from Miss Peregrine. Eva Green will always be my Miss P <3

It was a day like any other, or so I thought. The other children and myself were enjoying the day, spending much of it outside. I was stepping on the rope that kept little Olive from floating away while sketching her and the ocean scene behind her. She was laughing and holding her arms out as the wind blew her hair wildly, her eyes closed to keep herself from being blinded by the sun. I smiled as I worked on capturing her cheerful expression on paper. Emma and Bronwyn had joined Millard, Hugh, and the twins in a rowdy game of football, Olive in charge of fetching the ball from a nearby tree or hedge when one of the older children, usually Hugh, kicked it just a bit too hard.

“Come on, Hugh, just because you’re losing doesn’t mean you have to be a poor sport!” Millard exclaimed after Hugh had managed to kick the football up into a hedge for the fourth time.

“Me? A poor sport? Poppycock!” Hugh retorted, shrugging coyly. Olive giggled and tugged on the rope, motioning for me to loosen it so she could float over to where the ball was stuck at the top of a dinosaur-shaped hedge. She stretched her little arms towards it and picked it up. She turned around and gingerly dropped the ball down in front of Millard. He scoffed at Hugh before picking it up and running back over to the makeshift football field.

“Y/N I think I want to get down now. It’s almost supper time!” Olive yelled down to me. I lost track of time and hadn’t realized just how late it was.

“Okay, just a minute!” I called back up to her. I had strayed a ways away from where Olive’s lead shoes were laying in the grass. I picked up the rope and dragged Olive with me over to our original spot. I began to shorten the rope, pulling her close enough to fasten a shoe onto one of her feet. She then sank just enough to where I could hand her the other one.

“Thanks, Y/N!” she chirped just before putting on her other shoe and skipping off towards the house. I began putting my drawing stuff away into my bag. Before I could sling it over my shoulder, I heard Miss Peregrine calling us in for supper.

“Come now, children, it’s already 5:32!” I heard her shout. Two minutes late may not have been much, but to an ymbryne that was as bad as an hour of tardiness. I jogged towards the door. Miss Peregrine gave me a disapproving look.

“Sorry, Miss P! To be fair, I haven’t been late in thirty four years!” I pointed out. She let a slight smile tug at the corners of her mouth and then shook her head at me. I squeezed past her and found my place at the dinner table. Miss Peregrine was unusually quiet during our meal. Normally she liked to start a polite conversation about everyone’s day, but instead kept her head down and picked at the food in front of her. I caught her gaze a time or two, but couldn’t quite read the emotion on her face.

After dinner was over, I helped clear the table while the rest of the children got ready for movie time. Miss Peregrine and I stacked the plates without speaking, the sound of hard porcelain clanking together the only thing there to break our silence. I carried my pile to the kitchen sink, where my ymbryne stood waiting to wash them. I placed them on the counter and stood next to her awkwardly for a moment, eventually working up the courage to ask her the question that had been bothering me all evening.

“Miss Peregrine, is something wrong?” I watched her face carefully for any change in expression. She remained stoic.

“No, dear, everything is fine,” she answered, not even moving her focus from the dishes in front of her.

“Miss P, I know when you’re lying. Lying is highly uncivilized.” I mimicked the quote she always used on us when we were caught being untruthful. She smiled and paused for a minute, finally tearing her gaze from the task at hand.

“Well, miss Y/N, you are correct about that,” she admitted, holding back a light giggle. You nodded and gave her a knowing look, hands on your hips. She dropped the smile on her face and sighed heavily.

“I just…have a bad feeling about today. That’s all.” She shook her head and shrugged her shoulders, indicating it was a senseless reason to be stressed. But I knew better. Miss Peregrine’s intuition was hardly ever wrong. I stared at the floor for a moment, my mind running a mile a minute trying to come up with a reason for her bad feeling.

“Really, it means nothing. I haven’t a good reason to feel this way, so I don’t want any of you to worry about it. Do you understand?” She shot me a stern look. I knitted my eyebrows together in disagreement.

“But, Miss P, you’re never wrong about anything,” I countered. I knew I could get away with more than the others when it came to Miss Peregrine. I could tell she had a soft spot for me, though, she would never admit it. She claimed to “care for each and every one of us equally.” I watched her try to keep her expression rigid, but eventually she couldn’t help the grin that took over her face yet again.

“While I appreciate the faith you have in me, even us ymbrynes are wrong from time to time.” She placed a slightly damp hand on my shoulder squeezing lightly, her piercing blue eyes regaining the spark that seemed to be missing just a few moments earlier. I decided to drop the subject and nodded my head at her. I helped finish the dishes without another word.

-----------------

It was just before reset. We were all getting ready for bed before walking outside to watch. I perched myself on the edge of a chair in front of the large mirror placed in the far corner of my room, brushing my long, brown hair and struggling to put it in a loose braid. Usually, I would ask Miss Peregrine to braid my hair for me, but I didn’t want to bother her since she’d had such a stressful day. At this point, my hair was beginning to resemble a nest more so than actual hair. I was on my third attempt when I began to hear rattling throughout the house. The chair I was sitting on shook, and my reflection in the mirror wobbled. The pictures on my wall swayed dramatically from side to side. I gasped and jerked my head to look behind me as one of them fell, the glass from the frame shattering into a million pieces. I stood up abruptly and threw open the door to the hallway. Miss Peregrine was frantically gathering everyone and sending them down the stairs.

“What’s happening? Is it the bombs?” I shouted over the loud boom coming from outside. But even I knew there was another half hour or so before they were due at reset. Miss Peregrine stopped and looked at me. She shook her head, eyes wide with fear.

“No, it’s the wights and their hollows,” she said almost too quietly for me to hear. My heart sank. The very thing we tried to hide from for over sixty years had finally come to take us. I stood frozen, chest heaving as my breath quickened. My head swam and I could only hear muffled shouts coming from Miss Peregrine, who was trying to get me to move. A particularly violent explosion from outside shook the house and knocked me to the ground. After several seconds, I shook my head and saw a hand extended in front of me. I grabbed onto it and the the ymbryne pulled me to my feet then took my face in her hands.

“Are you alright?” She asked, checking me over for wounds. I nodded my head and she sighed in relief, but only for a brief second before continuing to shoo us downstairs. I followed her and the others down to the parlor, where she shut the door and locked it. She told us to draw the curtains shut, so we did. She then looked at all of us, no doubt making sure we were all present.

“Alright everyone. I need you all to stay calm,” she announced, pulling herself together remarkably fast. We watched her walk over to the bookcase on the right hand wall.

“Bronwyn, can you help me move this please?” she asked as calmly as she could, the crashing sounds from outside the house still in full force. Bronwyn nodded her head, determined. With a grunt she moved the enormous bookcase over just enough to reveal a dark passageway. My eyes bulged in surprise. I never knew that was there in the many decades I had lived in that house, although I suspected that was on purpose to keep it a secret.

“Okay, I need everyone to make a single file line and follow Emma into this tunnel.” Miss Peregrine pointed to the dark passageway. Emma held a ball of fire in her hands and walked into the tunnel first, Olive and Claire following just behind her. I started to follow behind Horace, but Miss Peregrine grabbed my hand to stop me. She pulled me aside while the others pushed their way through.

“Y/N I need you to do something for me,” she pleaded, digging around in the pocket of her dark blue blazer. I nodded my head anxiously. She pulled out a silver pocket watch with ‘Alma Lefay Peregrine’ etched on the cover. It was the timepiece that allowed her to reset loops. She held it towards me. Miss Peregrine never separated herself from her timepiece. I shook my head and backed up a step.

“Why are you giving me this? Aren’t you coming with us?” I choked, tears pricked my eyes. Deep down I already knew the answer. She looked at me with glassy eyes, tears beginning to stain her cheeks.

“No, my love. The wights will never stop looking for me. None of you stand a chance if I come with you. I need you to protect this for the sake of everyone. If they get a hold of it and me, there’s no telling what kind of evil could be accomplished. I have to remove myself from it. My one duty as an ymbryne is to protect you all.” She let out a quiet whimper, failing to hold back her sobs any longer. I gingerly took the timepiece and put it in my robe pocket. I looked up at her, my tears flowing freely now. I jumped as a loud crash sounded from the front door. The wights broke through it. I trembled in fear. Everyone but Bronwyn had made their way down the tunnel. She stayed behind to wait for us so that she could move the bookcase back to its original position. Her somber expression and glassy eyes told me that she heard every word. I turned back to Miss Peregrine, shaking my head in denial.

“But, Miss Peregrine, we need you!” I exclaimed, still in disbelief. She pulled me into a tight hug as I sobbed.

“No, dear, I needed all of you. It has been my privilege to care for you. All of you,” she cried. I held onto her even tighter, not wanting to let her go. She was like a mother to all of us and it was heartbreaking to have to say goodbye to her, possibly for forever. She stroked the hair on the back of my head and cooed words of comfort into my ear.

“I love you, mum,” I whispered between sobs. She stroked my hair and I felt her shoulders tremble.

“I love you too, darling.” She pulled away from me. She held my face in her hands and wiped away the tears streaming down my face with her thumbs. She held her forehead to mine for a few seconds before pulling back and placing a soft kiss where our heads had just met. She sniffled, took a deep breath, then grasped both of my hands in hers.

"No matter where you are, I will always be with you." She gave me a weak smile and squeezed my hands one last time before turning to Bronwyn.

They exchanged goodbyes and a brief hug just as we heard banging on the parlor door. She hurried us into the tunnel and motioned for Bronwyn to pull the bookcase back to its original place. I looked into her eyes and only saw regret. She put a hand over her mouth and gave me one last glance before Bronwyn sealed the tunnel. I heard a loud bang, then shouts from the other side of it. The wights got what they came for. I tried pushing the bookcase back so I could save her, but it was too heavy for me. Bronwyn pulled me away and kept me quiet. She forced me down the tunnel and we eventually made it out the other side where the others stood waiting. The tunnel came out to the very front of the house, just beyond the pond that lay between us and the front door. The rain came down on us hard, soaking our hair and clothes within a few seconds. All the other wards looked at me and Bronwyn. Our red eyes and sniffling noses were enough to tell them that Miss Peregrine wasn’t coming. Emma covered her mouth in shock, some of the younger children started to cry loudly. I had to look away to avoid losing my composure once more. My eyes widened as I heard the bomber planes near us overhead. I touched the timepiece in my pocket and the realization hit me like a freight train. There would be no reset, and Miss Peregrine was still inside. I shouted and tried to run towards it, but Bronwyn and Emma held me back. We watched in horror as the bomb dropped and landed on the house, destroying it in one massive explosion. I stared in shock, shingles and pieces of wood flying in every direction. I stood there motionless, the fight completely leaving my body. No screams, no tears, nothing came out. I was completely numb as I watched the house, our home, go up in flames.

--------------

With heavy hearts, and some of us still in tears, we headed down to the beach to get out the rowboats and escape. To where, we had no idea. Bronwyn, being the strongest both physically and mentally, made sure we all stayed together. She uncovered the rowboats and assigned groups of us to each one. We worked together to push them towards the water, when we stopped and listened. From a ways away, we could just make out a boat upon the horizon. I could hear laughter, and muffled voices. Male voices. Horace conveniently pulled a pair of binoculars out of his satchel. It almost made me feel bad for making fun of him for carrying those things around all the time. His breath caught in his throat as he made out the image before him.

“What is it Horace?” Emma asked, voice still weak from crying. He paused as he lowered his binoculars.

“It’s…the wights. They have something with them,” he stuttered out.

“And? What was it?” I snapped. He looked at me as if he’d seen a ghost.

“It was a peregrine falcon.”

#mphfpc #mphfpc reader insert #miss peregrine x reader #miss peregrine imagine #alma peregrine #mphfpc fanfic #miss peregrines home for peculiar children #emma bloom #bronwyn bruntley #millard nullings #horace somnusson #olive elephanta #miss peregrines home for peculiar children imagine #angsty #angst imagine

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lightarin · 1 year

Text

Dangerous Around Here

A/N: I had fun coming up with code names ngl

About this AU: This is a Pirate AU inspired by Cater's Halloween card quote that mentions HLB having pirate costumes the previous year! It will be a series of reader inserts that are very loosely connected. The HLB members are part of a pirate crew lead by the 'Red Tyrant' (Riddle) and the others have codenames based on their card suits! (Very original I know <3)

They fics do not have to be read in order, and reader is NOT the same in every fic. The only thing that stays consistent is the background of being on a ship together and being an infamous pirate crew!

It started with one random brainrot and became a series, but I hope you enjoy!

Pirate AU: Cater Diamond

"Ah-!"

You let out a yelp as you bump into someone, a strong arm wrapping around your waist as you stumble.

"Sorry! I wasn't looking where I was going!"

You gasp out, looking up into a pair of surprised teal eyes, seeing one framed by a black spade. A spade...?

"That's alright. I'd be more careful if I were you. It's a bit dangerous around here."

You tilt your head slightly. He spoke formally, not very common of the area, yet he seemed like he knew it well. Had he moved here recently? Or perhaps heard the rumors?

"Get them!"

Before you could ask any questions, the shouts from behind spurred you into action. Without thinking, you grab his hand yanking him along with you as you run away from your pursuers.

"Eh? What's going on?"

The surprised man follows you, glancing over his shoulder to see a few rowdy men chasing after them.

"Sorry, lad, I happen to be part of the 'dangers' around these parts!"

You let out a laugh, pulling him down an alley in an attempt to dodge the men.

"Now that they saw you with me, you'll be in danger too. Can't have that on my conscience."

"And what exactly did you do to them?"

You smirk, darting into another alleyway as the shouts continue to follow you.

"Might've gotten to the loot they were after first."

"You're a pirate too?"

The question has you screeching to a halt, your eyes wide as you look back at the seemingly polite man.

"Too?"

"There ya are!"

"Look! Corsair's got one of the Cards with them!" Deuce looked at you, shocked to hear the name of the infamous solo pirate.

Your own eyes widen in realization. After all, every pirate knew about the Cards upon the ship of Heartslabyul, steered by the unyielding Red Tyrant.

"The captain'll be happy about that!"

You mutter a curse under your breath, turning to face the pursuers with a pout.

"And here I thought I'd get a clean get away. To end up with a Card too?"

Although he didn't seem to be as fearsome as everyone had made them out to be. Perhaps the stories were just exaggerations. Many of them were-

"We'll be taking both of ya back to ship!"

"What did you say?!"

You stare in shock at the man who was standing beside you, the sudden switch in character throwing you off. The previously serene boy was now scowling in anger, cracking his knuckles as he stepped towards the others.

"If you want a fight, I'll give you one!"

Was he just acting earlier?!

You question your original analysis of him, quietly pulling out your two daggers. It was too late to run, and an enemy of an enemy was a friend, right?

Even if you wanted the loot to yourself, you felt that it would be betrayal to leave him behind.

Despite the fact that you had just met.

He smirked at the pirates surrounding the two of you, your backs touching as you both kept an eye on everyone.

"You have more morals than they say, Corsair."

Suddenly, things clicked into place. The Cards. He was the infamous Spade, known for his switch in personalities when threatened or offended.

"I see that the stories don't exaggerate your habits, Spade."

You retort with an amused smile, your dagger glinting in the sunlight as you deflect a blow from one of the pirates. He merely chuckles in response, easily dodging a punch before landing one of his own, the simple move throwing the surprised pirate back.

Within moments, the fight was over, the two of you standing victoriously over the groaning men with smug expressions. Despite being heavily outnumbered, you had barely broken a sweat.

"It was a pleasure meeting you, Spade."

He smoothed out his clothing, his serene demeanor back as he gave you a smile.

"Don't be like that, Corsair. Think of the fun we can have together."

"Hm?"

"Riddle, would probably enjoy having someone like you on deck. And if he doesn't well... At least Trey will vouch for you."

"Riddle... and Trey...?"

Your brow furrows in confusion, and at your mutter his eyes widen before closing with guilt.

"Ah... I forgot to use the code names again..."

"Cute."

"Eh?!"

You laugh lightly, turning away from the flustered pirate and walking out of the alleyway.

"What are you waiting for? Are we going to Heartslabyul or not?"

#arinttacks #arinfood #reader insert #fluff #gn reader #twst fanfic #twst fluff #reader x canon #twst wonderland #fanfic #deuce spade x reader #twisted wonderland #deuce spade #heartslabyul #drabble #pirate au

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