#random uncalled for thoughts in the tags :))

[dottores]

okay well, i logged back in, obviously, because there are clearly some things that need to be addressed and have been taken out of context. just because i’m leaving doesn’t mean i should sit here and let my name be smeared. 

to preface this, anantaru and i had a discussion where we came to a congenial understanding of what happened, there's been an acknowledgment on both sides of misunderstanding and believing distorted rumors and people that we probably should not have, but i’m still going to give a full explanation as to the background of everything so you all can understand and come to your own opinions. plus, if there's going to be a call-out post directed majorly at me made, i want an official address of it.

please do NOT send any hate their way, we have ended this discussion on good terms and have worked out what exactly was stirring this discourse between us. (spoiler alert: there was a third-party shit-stirrer that we both considered a decent friend at the time!)

i don’t really need a reason to block someone, and i shouldn’t have to explain it, but i did and i will again but more explicitly this time: @/anantaru made a post that i did not like. it’s as simple as that. it was a post about genshin characters and sex icks and one of the lines were “venti: too drunk.” i’m not anti-dc, but there are topics that i am sensitive about because i was sa’d in my freshman year of college—that is something i have talked about on this blog before, many of you who've been around since my tr era are aware of it. i acknowledged, and tee acknowledged, that this was probably a joke and was not meant to be taken the way i took it, but the aloof/casual way it was mentioned without any TW of implied dubcon, and without acknowledging that it was at least dubcon and could border on noncon in certain interpretations made me uncomfortable. i don’t mind seeing it as long as i’m warned. if it was tagged properly, i would have moved on without much care, but it wasn’t, so i was scrolling through the post snorting and was hit with that and i was made uncomfortable because i didn't like how it was just being passed off as an ick, and i blocked. there was no reason for it to go beyond what it did, yet we are here. anantaru mentioned that if you frequent their blog, you would know that they often write about venti and reader being drunk—i don’t frequent their blog, in fact this was my first encounter with them being reblogged onto my dash by shared mutuals, so it rubbed me wrong. thats the end of it. 

i’m not sure the exact timing, but i believe it was two(?) weeks after this, when i reblogged an unpopular opinion’s post with an opinion that i thought was fairly harmless. sure, looking back on it i could have phrased it better, i’m not going to deny that, but pinpointing my one opinion out of the hundreds of others that were objectively far more controversial than mine and crucifying me for it is uncalled for. you guys know very well that i do not have the time or energy to sift through random people’s blogs to look for minors. every once in a while i glance at the notes of shit posts that happen to be on my dash and i’d be a bit startled at finding a minor in them because i still do think you should at least try to catch minors who interact with shit posts because that’s the easiest way to find them. but i was working at a medium sized firm for a year and a half at the time of the post and i am currently in law school, i do not have the time to be psychotic about people’s likes and interaction, and even if i did have the time?? i’ve always gotten incredible interaction from y’all lmfao, imposing the idea that i’m jealous is entirely inane. i do still stand by the fact that my words were twisted, i was made out, more than once and by more than one person after the next bullet point's events, to have been some psycho that stalks peoples’ posts for excuses as to why they get interaction when that is simply not the case. 

regardless, after this incident, anantaru made a vague post that was almost directly quoting my tags from the reblog and was thus sent to me because many shared mutuals put together that it was about my tags. this was upsetting for multiple reasons 1) i had blocked anantaru by this point so i felt a bit violated that i was being vagued for something by someone that i blocked. 2) i started getting hate anons en masse after it, some of which were very unnecessarily explicit. needless to say, i was very upset and made a subpost on my main account after noticing i’ve been blocked on ao3 because 1) i was already upset and i didn’t even know why anantaru seemed to have it out for me much less go to the point of blocking on ao3 which leads into my next point and 2) i thought it was a bit ridiculous because the only thing blocking on ao3 stops is people from commenting on posts and i clearly was not going to comment on a post of someone who i was not on good terms with. reasoning aside, anantaru can block who they want and i was out of line for making comments about that in particular. i’ll admit that, and apologize for it. 

a screenshot was taken from my personal—not a good moment for me, obviously, but anantaru claimed in their post that it was about them with no evidence. i dmed them about this in particular because i was genuinely confused, we spoke about it, i offered them proof that it was not them because i had a discussion about this post with a close friend at the time of posting it and they believed me. i will attach screenshots below (cropped because there's no reason to attach the whole conversation) because i feel as if this accusation was rather extreme and i wish it would’ve been removed because it was obviously not my best moment. an explanation for the post itself, i was upset over plagiarism accusations regarding something i put my heart and soul into and then seeing the same person that made them consistently on my dash just straight up triggered me, for lack of a better word lol, so i made a vent on my personal. how it got misconstrued as to be anything about anantaru is baffling to me but i suppose that's a question for the subject of our next bullet point. i don’t want to go into detail about the accusations in themselves because i don’t want people to send the actual person who it’s about hate. regardless, that post was not about anantaru, i have never called them a cunt nor have i ever called them a gatekeepy cunt, though i’m beginning to think i should probably remove the word from my vocabulary atp, i use it far too flippantly. anyway, i do not know them well enough to formulate any sort of opinion like that. aside from that, in our discussion we came to an understanding over it and i wish that would have been cleared on their blog as wel. so i'll attach here (i crossed some out because i don't want to breach any boundaries regarding what anantaru might be comfortable sharing but i do think it's fair for me to want this particular point fully cleared as it was a bold accusation remaining up):

5. in our discussion, we came to realize that we have/had a shared mutual who was fostering discourse between the two of us. many of you will recognize her as audri aka alucrds, who has supposedly left tumblr by this point—i suspected this and anantaru has confirmed it while we were talking. audri was sending anantaru my posts claiming that they were about anantaru, but i will stress that the only actual discussions i ever had with anyone about anantaru was with tee and eris about that initial joke because it had upset me at the time, it never extended beyond that and it certainly was never with audri. my only conversation with audri that mentioned anantaru at all was probably around a week or so after i made the post in point 3, when audri asked me about ao3 blocking in casual conversation and i offhandedly mentioned that anantaru had blocked me on there—audri was a close friend at that point and iirc, she had actually told me right after that that anantaru had her blocked on tumblr, i had no idea that they'd been mutuals at all but either way, it was an offhanded comment that led to nowhere (or so i thought LOL). looking back on it, it was clearly her baiting me into giving her information about the post i made a week or so prior because after talking with anantaru, they explained that they got an anonymous message claiming that i was shit talking them for blocking them on ao3 and the only person that could have put together that the vent post from point 3 was about anantaru was audri herself. audri continued to evidently cherry-pick random vent posts of mine to show anantaru and claim that they were about them. why? i wish i could tell you. i considered audri a decent enough friend, and though she had her fair share of issues with mutuals and other friends of mine, i never really thought she’d stoop to this with me. but i guess there’s really no explaining people who thrive in discourse.

6. my comment in my most recent post about being harassed on ao3 and in comments and in asks was not about them at all. i thought it was very clearly about heliotropes (my dottore series) and pressure to update from certain readers, but i'm clarifying that now.

7. i never intended on directly addressing this, which is why i did not directly name anantaru in my post, if i’d known at the time that tee was going to end up addressing all of this, i would’ve just been straight up with all of it.

anyway, i think that’s all, hopefully this will be the last post for real as i am tired mentally and now i am also physically sleep deprived. i've been up since three so forgive me for typos and grammar errors. this all has gone on for over a year. sorry for all the discourse on y'all's dash, wish i could have left with a bit more grace than this. rumors have been blown out of proportions and blindly believed, things have been taken out of context, such is life. i made my fair share of mistakes on my personal blog with my vents, others have admitted and owned up to their own mistakes, some will never admit to their mistakes. such is life. it moves on, always does. i know all of y'all are smart enough to come to your own opinions.

over and out, sorry again, and logged out (hopefully for real this time),

cat

#tw discourse

[catgirlforkaeya]

you drew stars around my scars

kaeya x gn!reader

synopsis: the night kaeya finally decides to open up to you

word count: 2.0k

angst + hurt/comfort

warnings: all lowercase + not proofread + spoilers for kaeya’s backstory + spoilers for hidden strife event + mental health struggles

a/n: round 2 since tumblr decided to remove my post from the tags 😞

your eyes fluttered open slowly, looking around some to get your bearings about you. it’s still nighttime— odd. you rarely ever woke up in the middle of the night, so what caused you to wake up tonight?

you glanced at the clock beside your bed, it read 3:47am. with a small groan, you rolled over onto your right side. usually you’d see kaeya laying there next to you asleep, but he wasn’t. this time he was awake, sitting on the edge of the bed. his breathing seemed almost erratic, which sparked worry in you. he was just.. sitting there. not moving.

“babe?” you spoke softly, trying your best not to scare him. you sat up out of bed, shifting over next to where he was sitting. “what’s wrong? it’s almost 4 in the morning.”

kaeya quickly wiped something off of his face as soon as he saw you next to him. his eye was focused on the ground, almost afraid to look up at you.

“i just couldn’t sleep,” he mumbled, fiddling with his fingers. that was something you noticed he’d do whenever he was anxious or something was bothering him.

“i know you’re lying,” you let out a soft sigh. you reached down, intertwining your fingers with his calloused hand. “you can talk to me, you know.”

there was a long pause between you two. you could tell there was something bothering kaeya, but you didn’t want to pressure him into talking if he didn’t want to. you’ve always been patient with him, you yourself have a hard time talking about your issues so you understand. most people usually get frustrated with him for not telling them about his past, but you were the complete opposite. you always reassured him to take his time and open up when he’s ready.

“why do you stay with me?” kaeya broke the silence, the question lingering in the air. you furrowed your eyebrows, cocking your head to the side slightly as you looked at him.

in all honesty it completely caught you off guard. it took you a moment to reply, not because you didn’t have an answer though. it was because it was an uncalled for and random question. he’s never asked something like this before. you were starting to get a little nervous about the direction this conversation could go.

“because i love you,” you gave your answer as you gently squeezed his hand. usually he’d squeeze back, but there was nothing.

“but why?” he looked over at you. as your eyes met his, you could see the hurt and panic in it. tear stained cheeks could be seen due to the moonlight shining into the room. he had a dark circle under his eye, so god only knows how long he’s been without sleep.

“what happened to you,” you thought to yourself.

you adjusted yourself so that you were fully facing him. you grabbed both his hands now and placed them between yours. “because you make me feel loved. you make me feel safe and at home whenever i’m with you. you’re the best and most important person in my life. that’s why i stay and continue loving you.”

“i’m definitely not the best person,” he said with a shallow laugh. his eyes shifted away from yours as he said that.

“just because you have imperfections doesn’t make you worth any less to me,” your heart ached right now. you hated seeing him in any state other than happy, and this was the lowest you’ve ever seen him. you’ve been well aware of his overthinking nights but it’s never been this bad.

“they would if you knew the truth,” kaeya said, his voice barely above a whisper. you almost didn’t hear his comment that’s how quiet it was. it took you a moment to process what he was hinting at— your brain was still fuzzy from sleep.

“what truth?” you questioned, furrowing your eyebrows once again.

“about me, about who i really am,” he let out an almost frustrated sigh. he moved his hands away from yours, resting his forehead against his palms.

“your past doesn’t always define you,” you placed your hand on his shoulder, causing him to jump slightly. “we’ve been through so much together, and i love you more than anything in this godforsaken world. i promise that your past isn’t going to make me hate you. i could never even hate you.”

“promise?” kaeya slowly looked back up at you, tears beginning to fill in his eye once again. “you promise?”

“yes,” you wrapped your pinkie around his, holding it there for a moment. “i promise. swear on my life.”

kaeya’s hands got shaky, he could feel his heart beating out of his chest and started to wonder if you could hear it. the sake of your relationship hangs in the balance right now. he could take the risk and tell you, about how he’s not from mondstadt and comes from a nation that’s looked down on. or he could take the safe route and continue hiding everything from you. the guilt was crushing him though— eating away at him every second of every day. he needed someone to talk to about all of the pressure, but last time he did that it almost cost him his life.

slowly, he sat up a little bit more and reached back to tug at the string of his eyepatch. he hesitated for a moment, but something inside of him was pushing him to do it. show you the real kaeya.

no going back now.

you watched in shock as he slowly removed his eyepatch. you had nothing against what he was doing, it was just another unexpected surprise. all the years you’ve known him for you’ve never seen him without his eyepatch. but now you were.

your breath hitched for a split second as he revealed what was hiding under the eyepatch. at first you didn’t even notice the mismatched colored eyes, you noticed a scar. it almost looked like a burn scar— but also didn’t. it ran from the top of his eyebrow, cutting through the middle of it, down the middle of his eyelid, and ended a few centimeters under his eye.

his eyes were— gorgeous. all you’ve ever thought is that kaeya had two blue eyes, but to your surprise the one that had been covered up for basically his whole life was gold. not yellow, gold. gold like the sun while it’s setting on a fall evening. you also noticed that his left eye also had the star-shaped pupil.

you began to reach up but stopped yourself.

“can i?” you asked, hinting at if you could touch his scar. he gave a small and hesitant nod.

with that clarification you brought your hand up to his left eye, gently placing your thumb on the scar. his eyes fluttered shut as you slowly traced it, admiring its beauty. the texture of it was rough, rougher than the rest of his skin. it definitely felt like a mix between a burn scar and a scar from a blade. it was also a lot darker, which is what made you guess it was a burn scar. the color of it was almost a maroon color, it definitely was darker than his skin.

the two of you stayed like this for a little while— you gently tracing the outline of kaeya’s scar, also drawing small patterns here and there. to his surprise it wasn’t as bad as he thought it would be. deep he was worried you’d freak out and start asking a dozen questions as to why his eye looked like that, what caused the scar, everything along those lines. but you just stayed silent— he was honestly wondering what you were thinking right now.

suddenly you leaned up, placing a gentle kiss onto the scar. you heard kaeya’s breath pause for a second as you pulled away. you placed your thumb on his cheekbone, rubbing small circles into that now.

“beautiful,” you whispered as his eyes opened. a smile came across your face as you watched his eyes widen at your words. “you’re beautiful.”

next thing kaeya knew, he had tears streaming down his face again. nobody had ever called him beautiful in this context. he always thought his gold eye would consider him a freak, but you saw past that. you saw him for who he truly is. you were upholding your promise to him.

once the tears faded kaeya decided it was time to tell you. he started with where he was from— explaining to you where khaenri’ah was and how it worked. to his surprise you knew a lot more about it than he expected. then he explained what happened the night his father abandoned him, telling you the same words he heard that night. he didn’t get too much into what his childhood was like growing up with crepus and diluc, but that was because there wasn’t much to say other than stupid childhood memories that you’ve probably heard before. and finally, he explained everything that happened the night crepus was killed— the guilt he felt that night, why he told diluc, what caused the fight, and how he got the scar.

sometime during the explanation you began crying. you had no clue that kaeya had been through this much. you could tell he was broken but you would’ve never expected this. your heart ached for him— you wished you could do something to take the pain away. you wished you had been there for him when all of that happened.

when kaeya finally fell silent you pulled him into a tight hug. he sat there in shock for a moment, but quickly gave in and hugged back. he was surprised you were crying for him— not out of anger because he lied to you about everything. and honestly, you didn’t care about all the lies because it was to protect himself.

“i’m so sorry,” you knew you had no reason to be apologizing to kaeya, but you just had to.

“it’s fine. everything’s over,” kaeya tightened his grip on you, burying his head in the crook of your neck. his tears flowed down onto your night shirt, but you didn’t care. you sat there and let him cry. it was obvious that he’d kept all of this bottled up his whole life, and now it was finally coming out. kaeya finally felt free for the most part. he didn’t have to hide himself from you anymore— all the guilt for the lies was gone.

-

after some time you both wore yourselves out. now you were back in bed, holding each other close. you were once again tracing his scar. kaeya honestly liked the feeling of it— it was calming to him for some reason.

“i love you, so much,” you gave kaeya a tired smile as he looked down at you. your hands were cupping his face now, thumbs rubbing circles against his face rhythmically.

“i love you too,” kaeya smiled back at you. for the first time in a long time, it was a genuine smile.

you reached up and placed a kiss on his lips, then one last one to the scar.

a few minutes passed, you both were on the brink of sleep. the sun was slowly starting to shine through your curtains but neither of you cared. yes, you had work but it wouldn’t hurt to call in for one day, would it?

as you both drifted off to sleep, kaeya placed one last kiss to your forehead. he mumbled a small thank you against your skin. he didn’t know if you could hear him or not, but he’d make sure to thank you for the rest of your lives. you were the only person to ever truly see him for who he was, and not just a spy from a hated nation.

you promised him beforehand that you’d continue loving him despite all of the demons from his past, and you’re going to do exactly that until the day you die.

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin x you #genshin impact fanfic #genshin angst #kaeya #kaeya alberich #kaeya genshin #kaeya x reader #kaeya x you #catgirlforkaeya

[readyforthegarden]

Bubblegum - Part Ten

Masterlist

Pairing: Jake Kiszka x Female OC

Warnings: Shady management? Other than that, nothing!

Synopsis: When Eden signed her recording contract to become a pop superstar, she hadn't realized she wasn't just signing her creative freedoms away, she was signing much more. Her control over social media, her diet, and even her relationships. When she gets contracted into a relationship with some wannabe rockstar name Jake Kiszka, will she finally find her freedom?

🎶 🎶 🎶

Eden sat in one of the conference rooms of the record labels building, across from Louise, Matt and Bryan, listening to them talk about her album. It gave her a small smugness, knowing that she had an album already done and up her sleeve. Her phone buzzed in her lap, and she glanced down, seeing a text pop up on the screen.

‘Can’t wait to see you tonight xx’ Eden smiled at the message from Jake, quickly typing back the same sentiment. 

“Eden, dear, please pay attention, this is your career we’re laying out in front of you.” Bryan tapped on the table in front of her. She put her phone into her purse, folding her hands on top of the table. “Thank you.”

“So, Eden, we have a couple of songs written, and this one, we’re really excited about!” Louise slid the paper across the table for her, lyrics written on it. Matt pulled up his phone, and music started playing. It was sad, melancholy and Eden read the lyrics on the page.

‘You came into my life and changed it, 

now you’ve disappeared and I’m lost.

I thought you were going to be a perfect fit,

I took a chance at love and look what it cost.’

“Wow, that is….depressing.” Eden glanced up at the writers. ‘And not very good.’  she thought to herself.

“Well it’s a breakup ballad, it should be depressing.” Matt rolled his eyes. He was the least patient person on her team, having bickered with her over his writing the last time he and Louise wrote for her.

“No offense, but this sounds like something a third-grader would’ve written in their journal when their crush didn’t tag them on the playground.” Eden tossed the lyric page back on the table.

“Eden!” Bryan snapped. “That’s an incredibly rude thing to say.”

“It’s also the truth.” Eden shrugged. She was feeling more comfortable and confident in her skin since her trip to the mountains with the boys, and knowing that her own music was in her hands, ready and waiting for the moment to shine was the icing on the cake. “This is my third album. Are you guys trying to make sure it’s going to flop?”

“We’ve been working really hard on this, Eden.” Louise shot a glare across the table towards you as Matt paused the music on his phone. 

“Not hard enough. This is disney channel drivel.” Eden pushed back from the table, standing up and grabbing her bag.  “Bryan, you should look into new writers. Louise and Matt are past their prime, and they’re not going to make you any money on this album.” 

As she walked across the room she turned and looked at Bryan again, giving him a sweet smile.

“Is Mark Ronson still a thing? Maybe give him a call, he’s done wonders with Miley Cyrus. Or get that Ed Sheeran duet, that’d be great, thanks! I’ll see you next week.” and with that, Eden left the conference room, squealing internally at how cooly defiant she just was. As she waited for the elevator, she heard her name being called, and turned, seeing Bryan storming towards her.

“What on earth has gotten into you?” Bryan hissed, lowering his face to be eye level to her. “That was completely uncalled for!”

“No, Bryan, it’s absolutely called for.” Eden seethed. “For six years, I’ve played the part of the sweet, doe-eyed pop princess. I played along, recording songs about gyrating my hips against random men at clubs and trying not to puke at the not-so-subtle allusions to sucking their dicks. I’ve had my clothes, my hair, even my food choices made for me and I’m done, Bryan.” the doors had opened and Eden stepped in, pressing the lobby button and the close door button. As they shut, she spoke once more, standing firmly in her resolve. “You get one more album from me, we’re at least going to make sure it’s not the absolute fucking garbage you normally shit out.”

As she drove home, Eden pulled through a fast food drive thru, ordering the biggest burger and fries meal she could, with a sugary sweet soft drink. She knew her stomach was going to give her hell for it, but her defiant streak was raging and she couldn’t let it stop now. She pressed a few touch buttons on the car screen and waited for her call to pick up.

“Hey Edie, what’s shakin’? she could hear Sam’s grin through the phone and it made her smile. 

“Just got out of a label meeting, got the world’s biggest cheesiest cheeseburger, and am thinking about doing something impulsive. I need a partner in crime.”

“Well I’m always down for a good crime.” Sam laughed. “What did you have in mind?” Eden thought for a few moments.

“I’ll text you the address, can you meet me in like, half an hour?”

“Sure…” Sam now sounded skeptical. “Eden, this isn’t really a crime, is it?” Eden laughed loudly, shaking her head even though she knew he couldn’t see her.

“No, not technically.” she giggled. “I’ll see you in a bit, okay?”

“‘Kay, bye.” 

🎶 🎶 🎶

“Are you sure you don’t want one?” Eden looked at Sam as she sat in the chair, trying to ignore the nervous shaking of her stomach. Sam crinkled his nose, shaking his head.

“And mar my perfect skin? Absolutely not.” he took a sip of the latte he’d brought with him as he paced, looking through the different tattoo designs on the walls of the shop. “Are you sure you want to do this? I mean….they’re permanent.”

“What? Oh god, I had no idea!” Eden rolled her eyes, mocking him. Sam shot her a look before she continued. “I’m sure. Technically, I’m not supposed to get a tattoo while under contract, but who cares anymore?”

“You little rebel.” Sam smirked at her as the tattoo artist finished setting up next to her. “What are you getting?”

“Property of Jake Kiszka, right on my left butt cheek.” Eden answered. Sam snorted into his coffee, and Eden laughed. “It’s a flower, on my thigh and hip area…you’ll see it’s gonna be gorgeous.”

“Of course it will be.” Sam finally settled himself on a chair next to you. The flowy light weight skirt she had changed into from her meeting was pulled up on her left thigh, tucked into the leg of her panties. The tattoo artist was walking Eden and Sam through the steps of her placing the stencil on her skin, letting them know what parts were going to suck the most. Sam watched as the color began to drain from Eden’s face, and took her hand in his, squeezing it. “You’re gonna do amazing.”

“Thanks.” she squeezed her eyes shut as the needle gun started buzzing and took a deep breath when the artist began their work. “Okay, this isn’t so awful…it’s bad, but not terrible.”

“Yeah?” Sam asked. Eden nodded. “Then can you loosen up your grip a little? I still have to play music later.”

“Shit, sorry.” Eden let go of Sam’s hand and rested it on the arm of the chair. After a few moments, Sam pulled out his phone, taking a few photos of Eden in the chair, watching the artist work, before grabbing her attention and taking a few selfies with her, fake scared faces and big cheesy grins. “Don’t send any to Jake! I want to surprise him.”

“Got it.” Sam quickly backspaced after putting in Jake’s name on the text, then erased Josh’s too, knowing the twin would definitely show his brother. Danny was the only recipient of the photos, and he immediately responded with a shocked face emoji, and asking if Sam had dared her to do it. “Danny thinks I put you up to this.”

“I mean, is it totally unimaginable?” Eden raised an eyebrow to Sam. 

“Noo.” Sam huffed. The rest of the appointment was spent with Sam pacing anxiously and Eden near falling asleep in the chair after getting used to the needle. When the tattoo was finished, the artist wrapped it, and gave Eden tips and advice on how to let it heal, and sent them on their way.  Once home, Eden grabbed Elton from his cat tree, feeling the soreness from the tattoo come on and just wanting to lay down on her couch. As she got comfy, her purse began to vibrate and she stuffed her hand into it, searching around for her phone while trying not to disturb the orange tabby on her chest.

Her phone was blowing up with texts, barely being able to register what the messages were, just seeing Danny, Sam and Josh’s names popping up over and over.

“I can’t believe this!”

“This is absolute bullshit. I hate them.”

“The karmic retribution will be deliciously horrible.” as Eden tried to catch up on what was happening, Jake’s face appeared on the screen, and she answered the call.

“What’s going on?” he said as soon as Eden said hello.

“Funny, that’s what I was going to ask you. Your brothers are going crazy.” Eden asked confused. “What is everyone talking about?”

“You didn’t see?” Jake asked, exasperated. 

“I’ve been busy for the past few hours, see what?” Eden groaned.

“Apparently, you’re cheating on me.” Jake huffed a laugh, and soon a link to an article was texted to her from him. There was a photo of her at the tattoo shop through the window, standing next to one of the bigger, burlier tattoo artists that was there. Sam was also in the photo, looking uneasy at her side. The article wasn’t talking about Sam, though, it was saying that Eden was flirting with the artist and “sparks were flying”.

“Christ.” Eden sighed. “This is all my fault.”

“How could it be your fault?” Jake scoffed. 

“I may have mouthed off to Bryan this morning at my meeting.” Eden shrank into the couch, waiting for him to go off on her.

“Good, he probably fuckin deserved it.” he said.

“You’re not mad?”

“Eden, I wish I could’ve been there to see it.” he laughed. “Now, are you going to tell me what you and Sam were doing at a tattoo shop in the middle of the day?”

“Well,” she began, biting her lip. “It was supposed to be a surprise, but I got a tattoo, and I really love it.”

“What did you get?”

“Mmm, I’m going to keep that a surprise.” she giggled softly, petting Elton distractedly. “You can see it when you come over tonight.”

“Let me guess,” Jake said excitedly. “Oh, is it my name on your ass?”

“Did you talk to Sam?!”

“No! Why, am I right?”

“Not at all, but I did joke that that’s what I was going to get!” Her and Jake laughed together, and a knock on her front door caught her off guard. She got up from the couch, listening to Jake talk about how he couldn’t wait to see the tattoo, and that next time, he wanted to go with her, and get one himself. As she opened the door, she saw Bryan, looking incredibly pissed off. “Hey, I have to go.”

“Alright, see you tonight.” Eden hung up with Jake and stared at Bryan.

“We need to have some discussions.” Bryan said. “And we’re having them now.”

this is the tattoo that inspired the Eden's:

Taglist: @trafficwasabitch, @obetrolncocktails, @streamsofstardust, @sammiejane22, @myownparadise96, @gretavanbitches, @mamavanheat, @lunaindigoraven, @shutupdevvie @jakewhorecore @josiee-gvf @shesawomaninadream @writingcold @spicedandicedtea @niallsboxx @baguettejuliette @lallisonl @josh-iamyour-mama @gretavanflowerpower

#bubblegum fic #jake kiszka x oc #jake kiszka #jake gvf #jake gvf fic #greta van fleet #greta van fic #greta van fleet imagine #greta van fleet fan fiction

[eiochevart]

I am so sorry! I did not mean to be childish or offend by censoring the word, that was not my intent at all😥 I did write the word normally first, but then I was unsure if maybe you didn't want that word on your blog anymore? since I know the words show up in the search bar even if it's not tag in a post, too me it was also about my own interpretations of these anthropomorphic countries, it was fun to play with, but I slowly grew out of it and lost interest and have not made any content for years, but I do watch others content of it from time to time still, I'm just not active myself. also 100% agree with you on the not to spew hate to fans, that's terrible, I never got any hate when I was active, but I do saw some artists/creators get random hate only because they were a part of the hetalia fandom, and tbh that made me a little scared cause I thought people were going to think I was this horrible human being only because I liked hetalia🫣 luckily I have not seen any hate posts directed towards hetalia as a community as today, it seems like the hate has calmed down I think.

Hey, first of all I didn’t mean it in a hostile way! I got another anonymous ask regarding censoring words and it kind of shifted my perspective. I get how censoring a word can save people the trouble of seeing a post they don’t want on their timeline, etc. it’s just that I’ve seen it so often on the internet, that people unnecessarily censor things out of pretentious spite, that I misinterpreted it.

Anyways, I can relate to what you’re saying! Online discourse has the potential to cause a lot of fear. As I said earlier, I think reckless hate, rude anons and DNI stuff are childish and uncalled for, but I mean, what else is there to expect when we are on social media?

#asks #not an art post #Hetalia #discourse #as for the dni stuff #I understand that having a dni can be useful #but don’t come here and tell me that people aren’t abusing them

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Ninety-Eight

Words: 4k

Warning(s): Language

Tag List: @squiddtheekidd @unknownoblivion @haileynicoleseavey17 @cierrasixx19 @oskea93 @mgkobsessed @sharon6713 @itsametaphorbriansblog @miriampraez @allie-mcginn @rebeccaphillips14 @nicholeh7 @lilmou5ie @emariehorror @floregrohlssard @oldschoolimagineblog @abaldboi @liith-ium @jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels @ytwahsog @scarecrowmax @random-internet-user-4471 @solohqrry @sparxx27 @kaitieskidmore1 @cruecifymesixx @gingerspicetalks @fancywasmyname1 @teller258316 @ggorehorror @xrosegoldwolfx @mylifeisjustafeverdream @redlipscrystalskies14 @str4nge-haze @m-1234 @leatherandheels @dogmom2014 @viinceneil  @heavymetalgirl420  @gabriellasmind  @breakfastonpluto19

LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED

I sit quietly on the couch, peeling my shoes off while Duff comes inside, slamming the door behind him. 

My short lived night out with Valerie, Sharise, and Tansy was brought to a screeching halt once I slapped Bobby, unbeknownst to me that one of his buddies at the party was an off-duty cop. 

Things stay quiet between the two of us, Duff fumbling in the fridge for something to drink and I hear the bottle cap snap off of a Pepsi before the fridge door is harshly shut back.

When he came to pick me up I expected him to yell or barrate me for being an idiot – but then I remembered that he and Nikki operate very differently – though if he did yell or tear into me I wouldn't blame him. 

His black cowboy boots hit against the floor as he comes back to the living room, stopping to stare at me while I try to reach behind myself to unzip my dress.

"Can you help me with this?" I ask him, getting irritated with it and he passive aggressively puts the bottle down on the coffee table before walking closer to me, and I turn so he can unzip it. 

It's still quiet when he asks, "What the hell were you thinking, Vivian?"

My eyes close and I hold back a tired groan, looking at him, having to keep my hands over my chest so the strapless top of the dress won't fall down and expose my chest to him…though it doesn't matter if it does, he's already seen all of it. 

"I wasn't, Duff, I guess." I mumble, stepping past him to go to my room and change into pajamas. 

"Obviously not. You had no business going there tonight to stir up more shit." He follows after me. "I told you it was handled and done with and you said that you understood that." He adds. "I thought we had an agreement. It was settled." 

"She's got an active court case against them right now, Duff, it is very much not settled." I hiss out. 

"And that's Brynn's business. If she needed your help she would've asked for it, but she didn't. So you barging into her business trying to save her when she doesn't need it right now was uncalled for." 

It's as if he thinks it's going through one ear and out the other, approaching me while I pull on one of Nikki's old t-shirts. 

"You're pregnant."

"I'm well aware." I smartly reply. 

"You're pregnant and went to a party to pick a fight with someone over something that wasn't your business, that happened almost a year ago." He reiterates. 

"Duff, I really don't need an entire lecture about it, alright? It happened and I'm sorry."

"You're not sorry you did it. You're sorry you got caught." He corrects me. "What would've happened if you had gotten hurt, huh? Why the hell would you risk putting yourself and our baby in a situation like that?" 

"I wasn't thinking about all that, Duff, okay? I was just pissed off and – "

" – Did you stop taking your medicine?" He cuts me short, his soft eyes searching mine with worry at my answer. 

"You're not supposed to take Lithium while you're pregnant, so yes, Duff, I have stopped taking my goddamn medication. And I've told you this multiple times in the last several months but you're so busy with Mandy and the guys and God knows everything else – "

" – Woah, woah, woah, woah, okay hold on," He raises his brows, keeping his voice calm. "I'm doing the best I can right now, alright? Because you're right. I'm trying to balance being married, the band blowing up suddenly, my family, and you and the baby…if you just wanted more attention from me this was not the way to do it, Viv." 

The fact he feels the need to even add it hurts me. 

"You think I did this for attention?" I ask him, my voice shaking.

"I can't think of any other reason why you would go out of your way to do something like this." He says it honestly.

"I don't want anymore attention, Duff, God knows I have enough of it on me as it is." I snap.

"Then why did you do it? And don't feed me some bullshit about taking up for Brynn because you don't even know her."

"Because I know what it's like to be harrassed for something that I can't do anything about!" I outburst, taking deep breaths, feeling guilty for raising my voice at him. "I'm sorry." I say to him with a sigh.

"I'm in the press for this, too, you know." He motions between the two of us and I shake my head.

"No, you are worshiped for scoring with Vivian Sixx." It's my turn to correct him. "And Nikki is the victim of infidelity." I add. "And I'm the easy slut that fucked my husband's friend." I finish. "We're all in the press for it but we are not, at all, being talked about the same way…"

I sit on my bed, taking a deep breath and he slowly comes over and sits beside me, turning to face me before grasping at my free hand while my other hand rubs tears from under my eyes. 

"Fuck what they have to say, half of what they write is bullshit to begin with." He reminds me. "This," His warm hand rubs at my belly, "Is all that matters in this whole situation. Nobody that actually matters cares what the press or anyone else has to say about it…they care about you and your health, and about our boy and his health." He continues. "Even Mandy." 

I can't help but laugh, sniffling as he cracks a smile, too, and it grows when a sharp kick bumps his hand. 

"Hey, little dude," He chuckles, joy radiating from his face, his eyes crinkling with his ear-to-ear grin.  "Tell mom those motherfuckers don't deserve to live in her head without paying rent." 

I watch him for a second, his hand following wherever the baby moves. 

"Thank you." I can't help but say to him, a comfort coming over me within the last couple of minutes of our talk. 

"We're a team in this, right? I'd be a shitty team mate to allow my most valuable player to let some pussy deprived weirdo's make her drop the ball." He shrugs, his hands moving from my stomach to cup my face, my swollen cheeks squishing a little. "No more defence when people piss you off – because most times if it's worth getting in a fight over, one of us will inevitably make it happen." He assures me. 

"I'm being benched?"

"You're being benched." He nods, kissing my nose before kissing my forehead, and I can't help but miss Nikki as I lean my head against Duff's shoulder, his hand moving back to my stomach as he starts an entire one-sided conversation with our baby who very clearly enjoys the sound of his father's voice. 

Looking back on it in hindsight, perhaps I had wanted a little more attention. Everyone except Sharise was running around like chickens with their heads cut off the majority of my pregnancy – especially toward the end of it, when I needed the most attention. I talked to Nikki and Tommy a lot while they were away either trying to find a studio to record their next album in or trying to get some work done with other artists or working on seperate projects independent of Motley Crue.  

It got to the point I decided Nikki was just outright avoiding me. 

When I told him we just needed to do our own things and meet back a little later, I didn't mean live completely separate lives until we got tired of it. I would soon learn, however, that he was struggling with anxiety that he hadn't quite had to face while sober, and the mere thought of being in my presence sent that anxiety into overdrive until he was able to get on Prozac.

"Red Dancing Shoes." Valerie says through a mouthful of pizza, the two of us sitting on their living room floor, our eyes glued to the T.V. as Vanna White turns another letter.

"You think so?" I ask her, watching on, beginning to eat the stack of pepperoni I've plucked from my pizza to save for later. 

"No way it's not." She replies. 

"Red Prancing Shoes." One of the contestants tries to guess.

"Why are you adding a letter?! There's only six letters, not seven, and that doesn't even make any sense!" Val exclaims furrowing her brows while the audience lets out an "ahhh" when Pat informs her she's wrong. "Where do they find these people?" She asks me. 

"My old high school." I mumble, and she stifles a chuckle. "Vince would probably try to add a letter." I say next.

"Or add Vanna to the list of prizes." She adds.

"Exactly." I take a sip of my water as a woman guesses correctly when she goes to solve.

We hear the door unlock followed by the sound of the door alarm that dings when someone opens the door before we hear, "Val, I'm home!" 

"We're in here!" She calls to her husband, and the two of us look up as he comes in, putting his guitar case down. "Can you believe this man just said, 'Red Prancing Shoes', instead of, 'Red Dancing Shoes'?" She asks him as he leans down to give her a peck on the lips. 

"He probably graduated from Charter Oak." He chuckles. 

"Told you." I reply with a shrug and he points at me. 

"Are you gonna drive little Duff around town in that corvette or you just gonna strap him to the roof?" He pokes fun at me.

"That's a Nikki question." I shrug, having not even really thought about it. "If push comes to shove I can just get a bicycle with a basket and go from there." 

"Better make it a two-seater so Sixx can drive." He adds, sitting on the coffee table beside Valerie's plate, his hand reaching out to absentmindedly play with her hair.

"Have you guys decided on a name?" She asks.

"Nope." I shake my head, wiping my fingers off on a napkin. "We're still trying to decide if he should have a family name or a brand new one." 

"What would you name him if he got a family name?" Valerie wipes off her hands, too.

"Either Johnny Miles for the first name because that's my dad's name, or Michael Andrew because that's Duff's real name." I explain.

"What about Duff's father?" She suggests since mine dad's name is a contender and I shake my head.

"I haven't even asked Duff about it because it's a sore subject and I know better." I say.

"Ohh." She nods.

"I just don't want to name him something stupid but then I also don't want him to have a boring name, either, and there's a very fine line between a good name that sticks out and then a completely dumb name that's just stupid." I ramble.

"I'm submitting 'Eddie' anyway for good measure." He quips, giving me a big closed-mouth smile.

"I'm sure the papers would love that." I scoff. "Just another low blow to Nikki's ego." 

"Screw the papers." He shrugs, standing up, stretching, before he adds, "I'm gonna go get a shower, ma'am, we have date night," while nudging Valerie with his foot before he finishes stretching and gets a look on his face. "Psst." He says, getting her attention and she looks up at him. "You wanna…?" He nods his head in the direction of their bathroom. 

"I have company." She attempts to say quietly, a shy smile on her lips and he raises his brows.

"Um, actually, I've gotta go anyway. I have plans with Axl, so…" I gather my trash on my plate and Eddie holds out his hand to help me stand up. "Thanks." I say as Valerie does the same. 

"Thank you." He replies. "Bye, Red!" He calls as he darts to the bathroom and Valerie shakes her head, looking at me. 

"See you later, drive safe." She tells me. 

"You, too." I tease, and she lets out a small laugh before I hear, "Val, c'mon!" from their bathroom, Eddie sounding like he's about to explode from excitement. 

"I'm coming!" She calls back, heading in that direction. 

"You're about to!" He replies as I quickly make my way to the door, her laughter the last thing I hear before I'm closing it and heading toward my car.

That night was supposed to be dinner with Tansy and Axl, but Tansy had canceled on account of helping Sharise rearrange her furniture, and when Axl and I had offered to go help them we were berated with, "no, you're pregnant, and it's girls night, Axl, you're not a girl," so the two of us decided to have an attempt at bonding the best way we could whilst trying to sort through a box of my things my dad had dropped off that had been left at their house ever since I moved out.

"Check this out." Axl digs to the bottom of the box, pulling out a crumpled up picture of the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders. 

There's only a handful compared to the troves of girls they have currently, and even in the black and white photo that lacks the exuberant glamour they're now known for, I can easily pick out Tansy's mother and point her out to him. 

"That's Tany's mom." I say, poking at the picture, and he furrows his brows and looks down at it. 

"Really?" 

"Yeah."

He's quiet for a moment, before a little smile pulls at his lips. 

"That's kinda cool. I didn't know that." He puts it aside. "She doesn't talk about her mom that much." 

"Because her mom's the devil." I bluntly reply.

"I know they don't get along, I know she can't fucking stand me, but Tansy doesn't even acknowledge she's even alive right now." He shakes his head. "Which is probably a good thing because Tans seems happy not to have to talk to her anymore…I just didn't expect to see her mom was a cheerleader...what's the year on this?"

"1962 I think." I state. "She got pregnant with Tansy a little after that photo was taken. She couldn't finish out the season."

"What about her dad?" He asks me, and I get the feeling that perhaps I shouldn't be talking about this with him. If Tansy were ready to talk to him about all this then he'd know all of it by now.

"Why don't you ask her about it when she gets back?" I suggest. "I don't wanna be telling you all of it if she's not ready for you to know about it just yet." 

"We're married. Why would it matter, now?" 

"You'd be surprised how much Nikki hasn't told me about himself and we've been married for how long?" I mutter, picking up a case of cassettes. "A majority of our time in therapy together consisted of me thinking, 'and you didn't tell me this sooner because…?'"  

"You didn't tell him a lot of the things you should've told him, too." He reminds me and I rub my lips together and look at him. 

"I didn't tell him that stuff because it would make him worse." I defend myself calmly, remembering Duff's words about benching me and how I don't need to be so defensive. 

I know Axl isn't meaning anything wrong, so I don't take offense when he replies, "He still needed to know that stuff, Viv. I would've wanted to know." 

"I know I should've." I don't argue, admitting it. "But I was trying to do what I thought was best for him." 

"I can understand that." He agrees. "Kinda how Steven called earlier wanting to hang out with Tansy and I lied and told him she was sick when she's not." He adds.

"Axl…" I say it with a scold, and he sighs out. 

"You know what he does. You know what all of them are doing right now, Viv, except Duff." He tells me. "I don't want her strung out again, not like she was when we first met. She's running on a portion of her liver and her kidneys are starting to bother her. She can't afford to fall off the wagon so I don't need her hanging out with people that will pull her off of it. And it fucking sucks but Steven is one of those people at the moment." 

"And what happens when Tansy finds out you lied and told him she can't hangout with him when really she can, it's just the fact that you don't want her to?"

"She can be pissed, I don't give a fuck. I'm doing it for her, though, and she'll thank me for it one day." He shrugs. 

That was Axl. His heart was in the right place but he always managed to execute it in the most fucked up way. 

They ended up divorcing because of his strong hold over her relationship with Steven once the drummer was kicked out of Guns 'N Roses, also the fact she would end up relapsing, not because of Steven's influence, but because of Axl and the onslaught of stress that he brought to those around him. It was tragic that he felt the need to protect her from everyone so much that he didn't even realize he was the one that was driving her further and further off the wagon.

The two of us stay in quietness for a second, before I take in a breath.

"So, is marriage as shiny and bright as you thought it would be?" I ask next.

He doesn't have to really speak for me to know his answer, just the way his face lights up. 

"Give it a few years," I want to tell him, but I can't bring myself to piss on his parade. 

The difference in my marriage and his, is that he and Tansy knew what they were doing when they got married. 

Me and Nikki didn't.

"It's pretty awesome." He states. 

"I'm glad it is." I reply. "I hope it stays that way." 

"What about you and Nikki?" It's his turn to pry.

"What about us?"

"Are you two just pretending nothing happened or are you gonna renew your vows or…?" 

"We haven't talked about it." I say to him, my mind now focusing on if/when we will talk about it, and why he haven't, yet. 

"Oh." It comes out flat, as if he wasn't expecting that answer because that answer should've been a definite, "yeah, we know what we're doing." 

"It's just a confusing situation, you know. I think we're waiting for me to have the baby and recover and then we'll get into all that. But I do want things to go back to normal soon – very soon. I miss him. Even though it's kinda weird to be married to someone who hasn't been sober since I've met him." I add.

"Is he a completely different person or something?" 

"You saw him at Duff's wedding. He's just…" I struggle to find the word. "More shy, I guess is what I'm trying to say. I've always known him to be the type not to give a crap about anything that wasn't important to him and he's still like that but it's not as prominent as it's always been. Like now he's more hesitant about things…even if he shouldn't be."

"Well, that's not, like, a major personality clash." He points out. 

"No, it's not." I shake my head. "It's just gonna be odd not being the only one in the relationship with sense anymore." I add and he chuckles. 

"I think you just need someone to take care of." He says. "Nikki's a big boy, now, and so he won't need you to get him ready and stay on him about things he needs to be responsible for. Maybe you're freaking out because you think he won't need you as much." 

I realize he's right, furrowing my brows, thinking about it some more while he doesn't even see that he's revealed something about myself to me. 

"I think that's it." I agree and he looks at me. 

"You're actually agreeing with me on something?" He questions. 

"Even a broken clock is right twice a day." I shrug and he cuts his eyes.

"Fuck you." He lightly retorts.

"Fuck you more." I say in the same tone, standing, deliberately nudging his shoulder with my leg as I walk to the kitchen to get something to eat. 

I hear his steps come into the kitchen behind me and I offer, "You want something to drink?"

"Sure." He shrugs, opening the pantry to grab a box of cheez-its.

I hand him a bottle of Pepsi, and he furrows his brows. 

"You don't have Coke?"

My expression is probably filled with the aghast shock that he would dare to think such a thing would ever touch my fridge as long as Pepsi was still around. 

"Excuse me?" 

"Pepsi's alright, but I like Coke more." 

I blink at him. 

The years we have known each other, the amount of times he has seen me declare Pepsi better than Coke, or making a point to make it clear to anyone going into a gas station for snacks, or ordering a drink for me at a restaurant while I go to the bathroom that I want Pepsi if they've got it. 

Not to be over dramatic, but I'm baffled he's even asking me if I have Coke. 

"Coke?" Is all I can ask, furrowing my brows. 

"Yeah."

"Do you not know me?" 

"It's just a freaking soda, Viv," 

"No, no, no, no, there are differences in Coke and Pepsi. First of all, Pepsi didn't ever have to reformulate because it was getting beat out by the new rookie. Second of all, Pepsi's never had to reformulate the reformulation because the 77 days it spent being sold blew harder than groupies trying to have their rent paid. Third of all, Pepsi just tastes better. Plain and simple." I declare. 

"...Can I please have my drink?" He reaches for the bottle in my hand, and I pull it away from him. 

"What have we learned?"

"That you're deeper into your psychopathy than I thought." He states. "And Coke tastes better but I'll tolerate the rookie." He moves to take it from my hand and I move away from him so he can't get it. "Viv, cut the crap and gimme my drink."

"Pepsi's better." I joke, and he knows I'm just messing with him, a smile cracking at his lips while he tries to be serious. 

"Sixx, give it!" He reaches for it again, my back hitting the counter when I try to keep it from him, our one inch height difference serving in my favor when it's just out of his reach. 

I'm laughing so hard that it doesn't register what happened when it feels as if a water balloon hits the floor – more so Axl's boot – not until the both of us stop, his face going pale before I'm looking down at the mess going down my bare legs, scattered on the floor at our feet.

"Did you just piss on me?" He asks, and I'm not sure if he would prefer for me to do that or tell him what just happened.

"My water just broke." It's monotone leaving my mouth, as if I'm numb from shock to begin with. 

It's too early, my due date isn't for another two weeks almost…Duff's out of town on a mini honeymoon with Mandy being neither of them had time for an actual one when they got married, and Nikki's not even in the country.

How completely unprepared I am settles in quite quickly, and it deepens when I realize that Axl fucking Rose is going to be the one in charge of keeping me calm and taken care of until Duff and hopefully Nikki can be notified and get back home.

Upon this realization, tears start pouring down my cheeks followed by the first ache of a mild contraction, and all I can say is, "Oh, God, no." 

#nikki sixx #nikki sixx x oc #nikki sixx fanfiction #mötley crüe #gateway drug

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

I dont think anyone else has noticed this tho im sure you have (namely the people acting like clowns in the titanic tag, not you) but the 19yr old did not want to go on that sub, he was terrified and only did it to make his dad happy..idk.. it is very tragic and upsetting and even more so that people seem to ignore this and keep going on their weird jokes about the entire thing, saying how they all wanted to go when no, the 19yr old did not want to at all. I think going down was totally uncalled for, I think stock rush got four people killed and he is terrible for that and deserved what happened to him, i think it is sick he turned a mass grave site into a tourist attraction for bored rich people..but I think people just heard the word rich for these other four and just right away assumed they deserved to die when idk...I did some reading on each of them and they, aside from the obvious ick of being rich, seemed like decent people who made a very very poor choice and trusted the wrong person which led to them dying. the paul guy was (correct me if im wrong) a well respected titanic researcher for over 30yrs, the british man was trying to make flying more sustainable for the planet and such (again correct me if wrong) and the dad and son seemed to do a lot of charity work and were overall kind people..but yeah they seemed like far better people then most celebs people love so the entire thing rubs me wrongly, two things can coexist, the entire thing was wrong and not ok and stock was sick for what he did and his death was justified, but I also have a hard time believing the other four truly deserved to die (Sorry this is random just wanted to hear your thoughts!) :)

ive written the reply to this about five times now because i also struggle with my feelings based around what happened.

on one hand, i do genuinely feel for them, especially suleman dawood who was a 19-year-old kid. i think youd have to lack a heart to not feel for him.

on the other, i fully understand where people are coming from when they dont give a shit about them. two of them were billionaires and the other two were multi-millionaires. i come from a working class background and a single-parent family so it is difficult to feel bad for someone with that much money dying because of a decision they made.

but that doesnt mean i dont feel bad for them, because i do. five human beings died and i just naturally feel for them even though my conscious brain struggles to keep up with that emotion.

and as youve said, some of them seemed to genuinely do good things.

sulemans father shahzada funded mental healthcare for pakistani citizens during covid-19 and was looking into renewable energy.

paul-henri nargeolet had been involved in underwater searches for rms carpathia as well as a flight recorded from a plane that crashed though both were unsuccessful. hed also found a roman wreck as well as an aircraft that had crashed in 1979, giving some closure to the families of those who had perished. he has done a lot of important research on the titanic.

iirc hamish hardings company action aviation has helped the indian government and a namibian cheetah conservation company to reintroduce cheetahs to india, which is objectively a very good thing.

its difficult to parse through how you feel about the disaster because people are messy, and they do both good and bad things.

i dont think i know enough about any of the four adults aboard to say whether the good theyve done outweighed the bad, and whether other people even care about that when it comes to their feelings about this.

the one i know for sure that i dont feel bad for is stockton rush because this was entirely his fault.

im not gonna get into the weeds as to why exactly titan was badly designed, but to save money and for "simplicity", he employed some experimental techniques like the use of carbon fibre and the pressure pod (i hope i have the right word here) being cylindrical. he ignored regulations and laws, he used expire carbon fibre, and he turned a mass gravesite into a tourist spot.

and i hate him even more for how he designed oceangate. the way they work is that each dive would technically be research-based, but to fund it (even though rush is a multi-millionaire), they would allow people to buy tickets to come along. and i hate this more than if it was just tourism because the way hes tied them together has made it harder to criticise the dives because they have done important research.

i definitely he misled people because if you dont know about this sort of vessel, youre likely to defer to someone who helped to develop it.

however, i would err on the side of both harding and nargeolet knowing how unsafe it was. nargeolet had done countless dives just like it and he was in this world where people were saying this isnt safe. we also know that harding knew because his friend victor vescovo, who found the deepest shipwreck in the world (the samuel b roberts), told him that it was unsafe, but harding went anyway.

ive kinda just been rambling in my reply because i do feel torn about it. people died and i struggle not to feel for them, even if my logical brain is arguing with that. i think many people struggle to believe anyone deserves to die because were humans and we are meant to care about each other. its how we survived as a species for so long. but there are people in this world where if they died, the world would objectively be a better place.

at the end of the day, im not the authority on how anyone feels about this and i dont begrudge anyone for their feelings. the world is not black and white, and so much exists in the morally grey area.

youre entitled to feel however you do, anon. dont let others make you feel bad about it.

#anon #titan disaster #tw death #titanic #titanic wreck #again i dont judge anyone on their feelings about this #its a messy situation #long post

[ephrom]

Why I Cut Off SeptyPaws

Those of you who follow my Twitter know that I cut off SeptyPaws--because I quite literally tweeted that last night.

By the sounds of it, I'm far from the only one. Neko Koda--the person behind #SupportSeptySquad--made a post on TwitLonger regarding her decision to cut Septy off.

Meanwhile, a couple of days ago Kumo uploaded a call various people had with Septy--which began with LioConvoy grilling them over a situation I'll go into more detail about in a moment. However, I want to note just how angry and saddened Lio sounds during the call--coming from somebody who has known Lio for half a decade, I can safely say this is the most honestly upset I've ever heard him. To be honest, it actually made me tear up listening to how frustrated somebody who is usually calm and collected even in the face of the worst people was.

Coming from somebody who has known Lio for as long as I have, I know his critics commonly accuse him of being a hothead who goes off on everybody who even slightly wrongs him and will mindlessly scream at anybody who does not agree with whatever they believe. In truth, Lio is one of the most patient and easy to talk to people I have ever come across--it just so happens that the people who levy this accusations against him are not the people who talked to him with an honest conversation in mind. The reality has always been that the only things you need to do if you want to have a pleasant conversation with Lio are not get defensive, not get theatrical, and not lie to him. He is willing to talk basically anything out with the person in question on the condition that you keep your ego at the door and tell him honestly what's going on.

But this post is not about the various slaps Septy has gotten over the past couple of days, nor is it about the fact that he managed to put Lio in an emotional state I've honestly never seen him in before. Instead, I want to talk about what caused me to cut off Septy during this situation--because it's something I really don't feel is talked about enough.

I have two rules when it comes to people I talk to: I do not tolerate dishonesty nor do I tolerate special pleading. In my experience, Septy has engaged in both of these thing multiple times.

Regarding hypocrisy, I want to begin by talking about Septy's recent drawing of CarmenRider being gang raped by Prison Mate Luke and Kai Weiss. The tags for this image on the Rule 34 website include things like "handcuffed," "handcuffs," "non-consensual," "rape," "revenge sex," and "taped mouth."

Now Septy's a NSFW and has used the OCs of other people in the past. For example, at one point Septy made a piece of art of Neko Koda and CarmenRider's character Virgo giving a boob job to CarmenRider's OC. Neko Koda has said she's fine with porn being made of her OC as long as it's not rape porn, and Carmen has said she's fine with porn being made of her OC regardless of what it is, so I don't see an issue with this.

However, the choice to throw two totally random people into this drawing--including one who has basically left the internet because of the backlash they got--just seems uncalled for. Even ignoring my own thoughts on making porn of real people and people's OCs, I personally think the choice to add two people who Carmen has previously gone after--again, one of which was really only guilty of being an opportunistic liar and who basically left commentary all together after being called out--to be fucking terrible. This is especially hypocritical because Septy railed against Carmen using a picture of Neko Koda being raped as a thumbnail for one of her videos--when the picture of Koda, as tasteless and shitty as I thought it was, was both less explicit and didn't have anybody in it other than Koda.

Septy has had two excuses for this:

They were commissioned to make this art.

They made it to get back at Carmen for the thumbnail of Neko Koda being raped.

We'll ignore the fact that these two explanations are totally contradictory--was it made for revenge or to get money?--and instead go through them one by one. If it's the first one, then Lio had already told Septy that they have places to go and people they can talk to if they're ever in exactly this situation. The fact is, "I did it for the money," always an understandable reason for making the art, is not an excuse.

However, I want to break down the second one in a tad more detail because it was honestly the reason I cut Septy off. If Septy really made this piece of art to punish CarmenRider (which, I should note, wouldn't even work because she's made it very clear she is fine with all NSFW artwork of her OCs), then what they engaged in basically amounts to correctional rape through art.

For those unaware, correctional rape is the concept of using rape as a punishment for some crime they admitted--usually stepping out of line in a heavily patriarchal society. For example, a woman who is found to be in a lesbian relationship might be raped as some attempt to "teach her a lesson." It is one of the most evil things a civilization could possibly engage in. Here Septy is bringing back that same concept--and dragging two people into it--against a transgender woman with a girlfriend through art. That is far more tone death than what Carmen did to Neko Koda--which, I want to make it clear, was still terrible in every way.

In general, I've always known Septy to be a bit of a shady character and somebody who appeared to have a bias in their own favor. Outside of some light conversations in Carmen's server, the first real experience I had with them was the video on Kumo's channel with them, Definitely Board Oranges, Neko Koda, Ghetsis, and NazeNation where they all talked about CarmenRider.

I later commented on this video along with Fractured Light.

Outside of Koda commenting asking me for a live debate (which I'll get to in a minute), the only person from that video to comment on it was SeptyPaws, who said the following.

First off, I just want to point out how they singled out our take on their segment as "awful" and "one-sided." One has to wonder if they thought the rest of my takes were fine, or if they were only paying attention to what I said about them.

I should also note that nothing we did--even according to Septy--would make either myself of Fractured Light hypocrites--that's just not what that word means. For that matter, we were judging the video, not Septy as a person, so asking for elaboration on points made in the video would totally miss the point of commentating on that video specifically. Obviously if I were making sweeping statements about Septy as a person I would ask them for more information, but I was simply judging how they came off in that video.

Anyway, this comment then got tore apart by Fractured Light, Toganium, and Renbo64.

Meanwhile, Septy was ranting in my Discord DMs about basically the same thing they said in the comments. However, they also told me that everything wrong with the video was really the fault of Kumo, and how if only they had some more time the segment would have been perfect. Mind you, why they were taking my criticisms so personally when they also say the issues with their segment were totally outside their control was something Septy never explained. Nor did they explain, upon further reflection, why exactly any of this new information would disprove what Fractured and I said.

Most of you know what happened next, I had a live debate with Septy, Neko Koda, and Kumo.

At roughly 1:57:00, I asked Septy why they were no longer blaming Kumo for the flaws in their segment/the video more generally in front of Kumo despite doing that in private. The end result was Septy and Kumo going back and forth for a quarter of an hour--in a debate where all three of them were supposed to be fighting me.

Septy's habit of excuse making is also something that has been commented on elsewhere. However, this post is already long enough as it is so I think I'm going to wrap it up. To make it simply, I hope Septy gets better, and I stand by all my defenses of them during the situation with CarmenRider, but their own bad actions cannot be ignored.

#septypaws #neko koda #kumo #lioconvoy #Youtube #carmenrider #prison mate luke #kai weiss #definitely bored oranges #ghetsis #nazenation #fractured light #toganium

[cinnatwo]

Hope you don't mind but here's some basic name suggestions for moddy mew if you're struggling or haven't had time to look, feel free to delete if this is unwanted;

Pinky (cause they pink more of a joke name suggestion but when I did look at them this was my first thought) Rosy/Maple (from the Rosy maple moth which is pink and yellow, it's a very cute fluffy moth and is a personal fav lmao (I know I might use Rosy as a name for a mew I wanna make who's also gon be pink with bits of yellow who was gonna be actively based off a Rosy maple moth but lmao I haven't actually been able to make her yet I scrapped first drawing coloring attempt cause I didn't like it lmao, this is just a random trivia thing I wanted to share just cause I think itd be very fun if we both had Mews called Rosy, plus it's a really cute name and like with the mews green eyes like kind of a rose of u squint))

Speaking of rose there is a type of rose that's pink and yellow, according to Google it's name is "Peace" tho I assume maybe that means it represents that but I think Peace is a cute name and mews wouldn't normally have standard names I don't think idk

And lastly from my quick little research I found Aster which is another pink and yellow flower, check for aster pink yellow hybrid. The name aster apparently means Star and the flower was considered sacred to the Greek and Roman deities which is very interesting as like mews are sacred and diety in a way. These ancient wildflowers are steeped in mysticism which again very mew

Sorry these are basic and yea all themed around your mews colors, since I'm not sure on their personality ect I can't do a cheeky Google search based on that so I figured eh they might be named for their color.

If you want to delete this I completely understand its probably a bit rude/uncalled for I just saw your tag on mew that needs naming and thought I could suggest some names

This is all very welcome, no worries! Thank you so much. I love the rosy maple moth thing, and if you're alright with it, I think it would be really cool if one was named rosy and the other was named maple. I dont want to barge in on your really cool and original idea tho so dont be afraid to say no if you'd rather not. Also if you're comfortable with it I'd love to see the design once you figure it out, it sounds so cool.

As for their personality, their official Pokemon Nature(tm) is sassy, strongly defiant.

They hate humans and mewtwos with a burning passion and isnt afraid to say it. The only exceptions are professor oak and mr. Fuji. Cheesetwo avoids them like the plague.

If you dont fall into either of those categories they will be more relaxed and kind, but still enjoy sarcasm and satire and the like. If you're a victim of team rocket shenanigans you unlock her secret mama bear mode.

#the mew moddy gave me that i still need to name #i feel maple fits better than rosy but that might be me being biased because maple syrup is in my blood

[sunshinetoshi]

impulsively changed my desktop theme instead of sLEEPING oops i really like it but idk if that's the messed up body clock talking so i will look at it again when i wake up 🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️💓💓

#random uncalled for thoughts in the tags :)) #i am really grateful for my blog #and i had some weird epiphany recently about that #like maybe this sounds weird #but i'm glad my blog still feels like how it did when i first started out #i feel like the past two months were really wonky in that respect #being completely transparent the numbers and notes got to me in those two months #but like i said something sparked in me where i am truly having fun again #and there's no weight of anxiety #and i'm excited to create again!! #i mean i know i've BEEN creating but the excitement i had starting out is rushing back #it might have to do with the changes i'm making to the blog #it's like a fresh start or new chapter #idk whatever it is it feels good #idek if these tags make sense #i'm v sleepy HAHA #but ty all for making me smile on here #ooo better stop before i get really sappy #amaya speaks her mind💛

[scribbly-dee]

Jon was a better pick for head archivist (the profession not the godhood) than Sasha according to me, a Jon apologist/Sasha stan with a masters degree in information science

1) a disaster pit of an archive like Gertrude's requires a work horse like s1 Jon, not someone easily lost in the weeds like Sasha. For a body of information that huge, with subject matter that broad (even just 15 fear subjects is broad when you consider the overlap and highly subjective, contrasting nature of the statements), you want to create as little work for yourself as possible until you've built a foundation. Ergo, in this early stage you want a project manager who has the ability to burn through busy work, resists distractions, and remains open to his team's input for future endeavors while keeping them on track.

I also have a hc that a disorganized archive bolstered the Eye's hold rather than undermined it because that meant that only Eye-aligned people had the ability to navigate it. So in a normal case, I'd assume they could just call up one of their sister archives and borrow their database or taxonomy, because why reinvent the wheel, but here I suspect that messy records were an industry standard designed to lure in people with a craving for tidy answers. It's possible that no-one at any location had successfully organized their statements, or at least not before getting indoctrinated with some mark or another and abandoning the task.

2) Referring to statements by their dates isn't a bad idea when first tackling a project this unclear. When you create a spreadsheet map of your body of information (literally just a giant inventory list), I was taught to also provide an ID column to designate each collection item with a uniformed shorthand for easy, clear communication and notes. Think dewey decimal. It can be something simple as sequential numbers or dates. Why use dates and not statement giver names? Confidentiality is likely a behind the scenes factor in statement acquisition. Some of the statements are anonymous. Some names double. And the series demonstrates that statement givers rarely visit twice in one day, much less twice a week or month, and even if there are, they can tack a .1 on the end or something. This shorthand ID key will likely change no matter what once they familiarize themselves with the content enough to build a more thoughtful catalogue. So since that makes this a placeholder anyway, dates as a good-enough-lets-keep-moving ID would be my pick, too, ESPECIALLY because of point #3

3) the catalogue is nonexistent in s1, so the most pressing task is to create a taxonomy. Remember, a catalogue is a giant inventory list, a taxonomy is a predetermined, uniformed list of words to be used as metadata, which is like tags. We need taxonomies because a computer will think that The Eye =/= Beholding, so we build catalogues that only allow people to utilize one synonym to avoid inconsistencies. Building a taxonomy would be atypically difficult in the magnus archives, considering how unrelated or overlapping or contradicting all the statements are to someone not in the Know. Trying to pin down a vocabulary on day one will only create more work because it'll almost definitely need massive revisions. That's why it makes sense for someone to closely read several random statements with post-follow-up clarification in order to analyze the subject matter and slowly define a work-in-progress metadata. If they have a chance to kill two birds with one stone by making a recording? Go for it. I would not commit this task to EVERY STATEMENT EVER, but rather to a handful at first to help chisel out that high priority taxonomy, which is what one statement per week amounts to. Which leads me to point 4:

4) Jon's attitude toward s1 Martin was uncalled for and unprofessional, but Jon's frustration makes sense. Martin's existence on that team was likely justified to Jon by his fake masters in parascience, which makes Martin the technical subject matter expert. He's presumed the only one qualified to determine that critically important taxonomy because it'll have to be consistent with vocabulary and classification systems already established in Martin's field of study so that visiting experts can easily navigate it. Martin 🙃 is none of these things 🙃. So from Jon's pov, his technical subject matter expert is either A) being deliberately obtuse by offering tea and conversations about jigsaw puzzles with old ladies instead of results, which adds work to his already enormously laborious project For Funsies I Guess??? or B) Martin did not retain his masters program/doesn't know how to apply his skills practically and therefore isn't actually qualified to help with the task at hand. Or? C) Martin got a bullshit degree, landed a job where he can't get fired (supernatural contracts aside, libraries are famous for job security) and is now half-assing assignments that Jon is on the hook for since he knows he can get away with it, because tbqh some coworkers are genuinely Like That. All of which means that Jon now has to cover their collective asses by overworking to compensate for Martin's perceived fallthrough and record/analyze the statements himself to protect his team and to avoid admitting he couldn't succeed with Elias' hand picked resources.

This is maybe the most frequent citation against Jon's management skills, but the only reason Sasha may have avoided the same trap is because she invaded Martin's privacy and learned about his lie. Which... doesn't really improve the situation, just creates new problems. And also takes us to #5:

5) Sasha, light of my life, did not have people skills that made her excel at managment just because she's charming and confident. The main reason: she's habitually invasive as a coworker and employee. Imagine the conflict that behavior would have shifted into if the power dynamics tilted, if she was in charge of the people she wanted information from (it's an excellent, rich source of conflict, tho, don't get me wrong.)

Jon stalked Tim for a few weeks, maybe a month or two, because he was scared for his life and this became the catalyst for their relationship deterioration. Comparatively, Sasha stalked Jon and Martin presumably their entire working relationship, or at least enough to at least learn Jon's real age/multiple password changes and Martin's fake CV secret, all for fun. Moving past s1, Jon accidentally compelled mundane secrets out of Melanie and Basira which resulted in swift retribution. How long do you think those two would have humored Sasha's active, remorseless boredom?

Also? If the only issue is people skills, then tbh if I was coordinating this employee transfer, I would say to myself "I've heard that Jon's occasionally difficult to work with, but his work style is suited for the task. I'll just let him pick his team to make sure he gets along with everyone. We need a subject matter expert tho, so I'll include that one guy in the library who's a cuddly people pleaser, that will help smooth over any clashing personalities."

6) oh? Jon deniers say this is a public facing job and he needs to be more lovely? Bitch, the public treats jobs like this as basically free, walk in therapy. I've had public facing jobs similar to Jon's. If you don't go in with firm, predetermined boundaries, you'll burn out immediately and become a doormat. If anything, s1 Jon is the perfect combination of "my job is to offer One Service, and if that is not the service you need then move along, I'm not being paid to suffer fools." mixed with "I've decided my One Service includes a willingness to listen in full and let you define your experiences for yourself in a time when the world is likely trying to dismiss your fear and tell you what you saw."

7) insofar as formal training goes, information science is the type of field where sometimes people are just absurdly suited for it because they already interact with the world with those skills. I have a coworker who basically gave a work training on Info Sci fundamentals for fun and when I tagged up with her after, she had no idea that was even a field. Jon and Sasha imo are among those types that click naturally with information science, so I personally do not fault them for not having a specialized degree. If anything, Jon might have recognized his natural inclination and applied for the job for that reason a la "might as well, the worst that can happen is I'm told no." Did they all still need some kind of formal training to properly manage an archive? Yes. Was their need for guidance JUST info sci related or did they much more desperately need real answers on malevolent eldritch forces obfuscated from them to prevent them from safely doing their jobs? Probably a combination, but leaning much more heavily toward the later. So imo, they weren't unqualified because they didn't have a grasp on info sci, they were unqualified because there was a 200yo contrived plan to keep them ignorant.

#long post #the magnus archives #jon sims #sasha james #tma #magpod

[curvynerdfan]

Danny Zuko would never

Hey y’all! I am so sorry I haven’t posted in so long. Life drug me down into a routine of chaos to be quite honest. I can’t remember if this was inspired by a request or not so I apologize if I have forgotten to tag you. 

Jax x Reader 

Friends to Lovers, Sandy level makeover 

Warnings: cursing, mentions of addiction

Y/N was having a blast! Her and Gemma decided to drive into San Jose to shop for new clothes. Y/N worked with a non-profit medical assistance center in the pediatrics wing. She was off for the next four days and tomorrow was the Charming Fall Festival. Gemma had been really struggling lately, with her and Clay’s breakup and worrying about Jax now that he was President. 

Y/N was so happy Gemma asked her to join in on the shopping trip. The club mom had a habit of pushing the young nurse out of her comfort zone. Y/N was almost always in scrubs, jeans and oversized clothes. Not that it was a bad wardrobe, it worked for her purposes. But Y/N wanted to be daring and dress up a bit. Honestly she just wanted to catch Jax’s eye. Maybe even have a Sandra Dee at the Summer Carnival moment. 

Gemma said that Jax and Y/N were a pair of idiots, perfect for each other. Neither one realized they were interested in each other. No matter how much the people around them pointed it out the two remained oblivious. So when Y/N told Gemma that she was ready to do something bold, Gemma was over the moon with excitement. 

Y/N had never been the one to go over the top. Especially with her looks, but at this point she didn’t know what else to do to get Jax’s attention. She had money to burn and was ready to up her wardrobe. Gemma said if she wanted to get the title of Old Lady that they were gonna go all out. 

Y/N was suddenly very grateful that Jax insisted on sending Tig and Happy with them because she was not going to want to drive after the day Gemma planned out. Tig as Gemma’s go-to bodyguard and Happy as Y/N’s, all piled up into a Teller-Morrow rental. 

Gemma said that meant Jax already thought of her as his Old Lady, “Sending an enforcer, only happens for the President’s girl.” 

“Then why doesn’t he ask me out or claim me as his, huh? If he really thought that way then he’d do something!” Y/N protested 

“He cares for you and sent Happy! Make him step up and prove himself.” Gemma lectured.

Tig chimed in, “Sorry hun, Gem is right. Sgt. at Arms never gets sent with a random chick for a girls day, no matter how good a friend she is.” 

Happy let out a resounding hum in affirmation. Y/N gawked at the first shop they pulled up to at Gemma’s demand. It was a very nice vintage clothing and accessory store.

“I’ll buy you the first ten pieces of jewelry you find that fit a president’s Old Lady.” Gemma paused to laugh at Y/N’s shocked expression, “Move it or lose it sweet cheeks, offer ends in thirty minutes!” 

Y/N squealed and grabbed Happy’s arm tugging him along. While he was a man of few words, Y/N had a knack for deciphering his gruff responses and gestures. She knew he’d be great at helping her pick out some goodies. She’d hold a pair of earrings up to her face or model a chunky bracelet and depending on Happy’s response she’d add it to her basket or throw it away. 

By the time she met Gemma and Tig at the register she had collected a skull ring, a chain belt, crow studded earrings, a crescent moon necklace, a crow skull ring, an obsidian oval faced ring, a snake necklace, a pair of silver hoops, diamond stud earrings, and black dangle earrings. Gemma pried over the basket in judgement before giving a sharp nod and motioning Y/N to hand the items to the cashier. 

Y/N was happy to see that Gemma had found a few items to purchase for herself as well. While they were checking out Y/N saw several studded belts, a new mirror for her vanity, some vintage ashtrays and a gorgeous green glass vase. Gemma demanded that the boys load the car with her new purchases and locked arms with Y/N before strutting out of the shop. 

Next was a gigantic department store. Gemma dragged her through the store and repeatedly threw clothes at Happy and Tig to carry to a dressing room. By the time Gemma was done each woman had fifty or so items to try on and there were even a few things for the men to try on as well. 

They would all try on a complete outfit, step outside of the room, do a little spin or strut(stand and pout in Happy’s case), receive critiques or hype and then repeat. The boys ran out quickly and ended up lounging on a couch and offering opinions when asked. Gemma told Y/N that the goal was sophisticated grunge. She still wasn’t sure she understood, but she did feel very hot in everything they decided to buy. 

Next was shoes.Y/N decided to only buy four pairs and let everyone have a say.  Happy found Y/N the best pair of riding boots for women, Tig picked out some dagger-like heels, Gemma picked a pair of knee high heeled boots and Y/N picked white sneakers that matched the ones she bought Jax a few years ago. 

Last stop was a nail salon. Gemma sent Y/N straight to the back room to get waxed. When Y/N gave her a look and squawked at her, Gemma just twirled her finger and said to “do what needs to be done”. When Y/N stumbled back out of the room, Gemma had a mimosa waiting for her. 

Y/N couldn’t commit to long nails or a dark color due to her job but it was still nice to be pampered after such a long and challenging day. While getting their nails done, the girls talked through what Y/N should wear the next night for the carnival. The three pros of MC life gave Y/N a few pointers on how to own being an old lady. This still made Y/N scoff and worry that everyone was wrong. 

----------------------- 

The carnival was finally here and Jax was excited for some much needed time off with his family and friends. Gemma wanted to watch Abel for the night. This meant he could really relax and let loose tonight. No worries about staying out too late for his little man or limiting his alcohol or weed. It was gonna be great. 

At least, til he saw Y/N walking up, “What the hell are you wearing?” 

Y/N looked different, that’s for sure. She knew she didn’t look bad though. She had on a tight black wrap-around long-sleeve crop top, ripped jeans with fishnets underneath and the white sneakers she picked out. She even threw on some of the goodies that Gemma bought her. She cinched her waist in with the chain belt, the crow studs and skull ring added to the alure. Her hair was curled and she did her makeup, highlighting her sparkling eyes with black eyeliner and her plump lips with a deep red lipstick. 

“What do you mean?” Y/N asked, holding back remorse for dressing up. 

“You look like a, shit, who are you dressed up for?” Jax questioned. 

“Why does it have to be for someone? Can’t I look hot without it being for someone,” Y/N put a hand on her hip, beginning to get pissed. 

“You look like you’re trying to lock a member down! Got your eyes set on one of the guys huh? You’ve been hanging around Happy a lot lately, trying to be his old lady?” He prodded. 

“Dammit Jax! I had my eyes set on you but I guess I can’t be your old lady unless I am pining desperately for you to rescue me! Maybe I need a stalker or some form of addiction for you to realize I like you” Y/N screamed, stomping off. 

Y/N knew that was uncalled for but her anger got the better of her but not even Danny Zuko would pull this kind of douche move. It definitely wasn’t going the way she thought it would. While she didn’t necessarily believe the others when they said Jax was interested, it hurt that he was so offended by her looks. Her eyes began to sting as she pondered why she even considered making a move. 

Jax lost his breath when Y/N yelled at him. He quickly got it back when a ringed had slammed into the back of his head. When he whipped his head around he saw a pissed off Gemma staring him down. 

“Remember how you sent Happy and Tig with us yesterday? She spent the entire buying stuff because she wanted to look like an old lady. She did that for you. We all encouraged her because everyone here sees how y’all feel about each other except the two of you. If you don’t wanna be with her, cut it off now and stay at the table. But if you want her to be your old lady like we know you do, you better chase after her.”, his mom said, matter-of-factly. 

Jax stared at her with his mouth open. He was still in shock. He always saw Y/N as his but didn’t think she would want to be with him. When she left for college, he thought he lost his chance. She came back and he was with Wendy. She dated some uppity guys here and there, he assumed that was her type and she was ready to settle down. So when Tara decided to stay in Charming and he saw Y/N out on another date, he chose to go back to Tara. 

To think that he and Y/N could have been together for years now was making his head run circles around his heart. The fact that she did all of this to be with him permanently seemed ridiculous to him. She could have just told him, but looking back she must have been trying for years. The dedication to him and the club wasn’t out of friendship but love. 

“Fuck”, Jax let slip from his lips as he hopped off of the table he was sitting on. 

He marched off on a mission, searching for Y/N. He stomped through the happy crowd and scanned the flashing neon lights with his eyes. He was pissed at himself. He knew his mom was right too, if he didn’t show his feelings now he and Y/N didn’t have a chance in hell. He just hoped he could find her. 

Y/N stopped at the ferris wheel. Her eyes were still stinging but she refused to cry, especially in front of all these people. She would either get up in the air and cry or calm down. She was losing it on the inside. Every single person she talked to said Jax felt the same way, but Jackson’s reaction was the opposite of what was expected. 

Y/N was at the front of the line when Jax finally tracked her down. Jax picked up his pace and managed to get to the ticketer as she got in on her own. Jax shoved a handful of cash into the operators hands when he protested and hopped in with her and shut the door behind him. 

“What the hell do you think you’re doing Jackson?” Y/N huffed

Jax flinched at the use of his full name, “I fucked up. Can we talk?” 

“It doesn’t matter, you trapped me with you. You got one loop to convince me to stay on the ride with you”, she demanded. 

Y/N was pissed. First, Jax insulted her and asked her if she was trying to nail one of his guys and now he wouldn’t even let her cry it out on her own. She was waiting for him to pull the “let her down easy” lines she knew the man had memorized. Except with Y/N it was going to be… 

“We have been friends for as long as I remember. I didn’t realize that you felt that way about me.” 

Y/N cut Jax off, “Look, we don’t have to do this. I’m trying to keep my shit together but I’d rather not do this right now.” 

Confusion graced Jax’s face, “No, I, I’m trying to explain. It’s not what you think.” 

“I’m pretty sure it is, Jax. You made your point earlier, if I want to be an old lady I should look to Happy and or another member.”, Y/N ranted, this last thing she wanted was to dig into why Jax didn’t want to be with her. 

“Dammit Y/N! I am trying to tell you that I love you, too!” Jax shouted, losing it for a moment. 

He pulled Y/N in for a kiss, one had cupped her face and the other pulled Y/N onto his lap. Y/N was shocked at Jax’s announcement and even more so at his lips on hers. 

By the time Jax and Y/N had finished a loop, she was happy to stay on the ferris wheel with him. By the time the ride had ended they had become a couple and managed to mark their claims on each other. By the time the duo made it back to the crew’s table, the group began to hoop and holler. Y/N felt her cheeks heat up and ducked her head into Jax’s arm while he received high fives and slaps on the back in congratulations. 

“Let me know when to expect another grandbaby!”, Gemma said with glee as she walked past the happy couple with a sleepy Abel in her arms. 

To say the least, Momma Gemma is the best

Taglist: @justahopelessssromantic

#Jackson Teller #Jax Teller #jax x reader #jax oneshot #sons of anarchy #sons of anarchy imagine #sons of anarchy request #soa #soa imagine #jackson teller x reader #jax teller imagine #my work

[alien-ally]

place to be aggressively loveless and also post about the shows and characters i love without regrets

In short, apart from being an aspec safespace, as of late i’ve also started to post a lot about the shows/books (jbl mostly) i’m watching/reading as i don’t really want to set up another blog for it, new tag system is in place so consider checking that out!

Good day and do not take the intro too formally, as mentioned, i shall be posting about my very compelling interests infrequently. I've modified the intro too many times. Thought i should give a heads up regarding that in case you decide to follow me.

Welcome once again. This is going to be a wholly informal blog. Perhaps, a little unorganized too since I’ll mostly be posting on whim. (just that though. just the posting that’ll be spontaneous. the content will mostly be edited forms of stuff I write in my journal.) At first, I was thinking of watching tutorials to set this up (and I did a little) - but that’ll make it more complicated and I’m not going for that sort of an approach - so here we go. This is a casual, unprofessional blog containing the thoughts, musings and confessions(?) of an aroaceapl youngster. If it helps out even one other aspec like me, I’d consider my mission complete! As an informal blog, I'd be posting from my experiences and how I personally have it so none of my posts should be taken as a basis of definition or generalization for any of the mentioned identities. Will be posting irregularly.

If you're someone that makes it a point to search up the aspec tags and comment absolutely uncalled for aphobic shit on our posts, do not interact. As if you're going to listen to me, thank you.

P.s infrequently there'll be cryptic writings and out of topic posts, look out ᵔᴥᵔ

the blog has begun to slowly deviate and branch out into all things late night me but it'll always be primarily my aspec safe space so if you like the sound of that, consider staying<2

Are you greyapl too? Got any unique/weird takes on friendship? Share it with me or hit me up thru text, would love it.

(tagging #aa mine for my posts and some important reblogs)

new tagging system unlocked! just realized my knick-knack tag is in chaos cause i keep forgetting i use the hyphenated one, will get to fixin it one day

skate's strokes: resisdent aspec, 'actual motivation behind setting up blog' posting (+crafting posting)

thingamabob: showposting i.e bl

bobblehead: the more poignant, longer random posting

knick-knack: inconsequential random things that happen to me, i.e when it rains etc.

Much warmth. Stay safe everyone!

p.s also lmk if u think my pfp needs a renewal lmao. been wondering if it's become too bland. Text me randomly and I'll reply within a week if I'm not too stressed :))

#welcome #aroaceapl #aroace #asexual #aromantic #aplatonic #aroace teen #loveless aro #indian aroace #indian aro #indian apl #yes absolutely I'm an indian aspec #aa mine

[amitlee]

Could you do 12 with lee Eret!? It’s fine if not I just haven’t seen a lot with Eret!

So crazy story, I had started writing down my ideas for thoes promts and I had lee Eret down for this one, so I am stoked to do this!

12. “Why are you wearing a crop top?”

Summary: There is one person Eret goes to when he is in a certain mood, maybe a tag team wouldn’t be so bad.

Lee!Eret Ler!BBH

———————————————————————

The sun rose, bringing another morning across the Dream SMP. It was a beautifully average day, the cows were mooing, bees were buzzing, and children were screaming. Eret awoke in his castle, he decided that he would go out on the server today. He dressed in his normal pants and royal mantle but exchanged his shirt for a nice crop top. Eret was not known for having lee moods, he was highly revered as King and was seen as neutral if not leaning Ler.

For this very reason, when he had lee moods there was one person he would go to, BadBoyHalo. Bad was trustworthy, kind, and could be absolutely ruthless.

So here he was, taking a nice stroll to the Badlands in search of his friend. As he was walking he mind wondered what the next half an hour or so of his life entailed; did he want a soft or rough wrecking? Did he want to be wrecked at all? He sighed, he had always been rather indecisive.

“Eret, hey!”

Eret was pulled from his thoughts as he heard the voice of the very man he was looking for.

“Bad, it’s good to see you! How have you been?” Keeping it casual, maybe he’ll just take the hint.

“Not to shabby, and you? I like the shirt by the way, is it just for fun or does it mean something?” The question was innocent and paired with an interested smile.

“I’ve been- uh- good. The shirt! Yeah, I like it too! It could be taken in many ways, I just- I just like it kinda.” The regal fumbled over his words and began to figit as his felt his face flush.

The interested smile changed to a look of concern and amusement, “Kinda? Is everything alright?” Bad asked, he put a hand on the smaller man’s shoulder.

Screw Bad and always being so nice. Eret knew there was no way to dampen his blush by now. “Y-yeah Bad I’m finE-“ he squeaked in suprise at the contact. “Ya know... there is this thing we do sometimes and I might be in a certain mood for it maybe.”

“Ohhh, you silly muffin! Is that why you got all flustered-awww! Go ahead and ask for me please.” He could be ruthless. Bad knew how much teasing affected Eret and he intended to start early!

“Bad- I- can we- you... Bad this is so mean.”

“Mean?! This is adorable!! You are adorable! You know what, screw it.” Bad threw Eret over his shoulder and began to walk back to his and Skeppy’s house. (Just a reminder, Bad is canonically 9 foot something so this is physically possible and not too awkward. Ok sorry! Amity out✌️)

Eret yelped at being tossed like a sack of potatoes, he didn’t really mind though. Bad always walked with a pep in his step, so he was jolted around a little, only adding to the playful and giggly atmosphere.

“We’re going to have so much fun, do you have anything particular in mind? I know you couldn’t ask for it, cutie, but can you push me in the right direction?” They approached his house fairly quickly because of Bad’s long ass legs and Eret could feel butterflies erupt in his stomach, he was already feeling giddy.

“Uhum I just want to be wrecked please...” His voice trailed off towards the end of the sentence and went completely limp in Bad’s arms.

“Aww, you really are adorable. Don’t worry little lee, we’re here!” Bad gently dropped Eret on the bed and took a second to appreciate him. From his pink cheeks and and crop top to things you couldn’t physically see, Bad was truely honored that he held Eret’s trust.

Bad sat on Eret’s thighs and put the man’s hands above his head, “these-“ he gestured to his hands, “-stay right here, ok?” He let his own hands rest on Eret’s sides.

Eret flinched as his arms were guided above him, giggles filled his chest, barley being held in. “Yep!” He cleared his throat, “Yep! That’s goo-great with me.”

And so it began. Bad let his fingers spider from Eret’s lower sides to his upper ribs, throwing random pokes in occasionally. He watched as Eret fell into titters. Gradually he upped the pace until Eret graduated from titters to light laughter.

“Not many people know this Eret but I actually am quite the musician. Now, I wouldn’t call myself a Wilbur, but I’ve always been rather good at the piano. Do you know what is similar to a piano?” Bad watched fondly as the King registered his question and spoke through his giggles.

“Whahahat is lihike a piahaha- a piano?” Eret couldn’t meet his friend’s gaze, but he genuinely pondered the question. He didn’t see how music was relevant to this situation, but Bad never ceased to make fun little conections.

BadBoyHalo giggled and replied “Ribs!” He skittered his fingers under the crop top to vibrate his fingers into Eret’s ribs, making him throw his head back and struggle to hold up his arms. “The bones are like the keys and you make the music! There are many different ways to tickle tickle tickle ribs as well, so they can make many different noises.”

Eret snorted amidst his laughter when Bad dug between his ribs, keeping it light but still firm. When Bad lighted to scratching both sides of the ribs instead, he was rewarded with high pitch giggles and much more squirming.

“Hmm... Do you think raspberries would work well, Piano?”

Eret closed his eyes and shook his head, “Nohoho! You dohohon’t play piahahanos like thahat Bad! Whahat kind of muhuhusician are yohuhu?” He couldn’t help but be a little cheeky.

Bad gasped and stilled his fingers. “Now that, mister, was just uncalled for. I invite you into my home and give you the tickles you desire and this is the thanks I get? I don’t think so.” Bad resumed the action of his hands at Eret’s ribs and took a deep breath before blowing a raspberry on Eret’s belly.

“W-What... Bahahad wait! WahahaIIIT NOHOHO!” Eret all but dissolved into the mattress as two spots were targeted at once. His laughter peaking for a moment before calming slightly. He was about to speak again when Bad drew in another breath and blew another raspberry, this time shaking his head into the smaller man’s stomach. Eret cut himself off with a squeal and dropped his arms down to push at Bad’s shoulders.

Bad raised his head and slowed his hands until his pointer fingers were tracing shapes onto the skin. “Eret. Thoes aren’t your arms not being where they’re supposed to be, right?”

Eret drew in a breath to respond, “I-“

“Because if they are... well, I’m sure you know what happens when people break the rules.” Bad willed his voice to drop and held eye contact with Eret.

“Whahat happens?” Eret asked through giggles.

Bad leaned in to whisper in his lee’s ear, “They. Get. Punished.” He emphasized his words with pokes to Eret’s stomach, he gathered Eret’s hands in one of his own and pinned them back to the bed. When he finished he leaned back to his original position and blew series of small, well calculated raspberries on Eret’s stomach and ribs, leaving his free hand to scritch and spider the other’s armpits.

Eret borderline screamed as his squirming began anew. His armpits had always been a weak spot, abb bed combined with raspberries on two spots! It was very tickly. He let laughter overtake him as he basked in the sensation for a few moments.

“Bad? Eret? What’s going on?” Skeppy had gotten back to his and Bad’s shared home to the sound of screeches and immediately rushed towards the source.

Eret’s blush darkened significantly, especially when Bad didn’t lower the intensity of his tickles.

“Oh, hi Skep! Sorry, I had a situation to deal with. Well Eret, don’t be rude, say hello to Skeppy.” He blew another raspberry, “Or better yet, why don’t you tell him what’s going on, if you’re comfortable. Answer him this, why are you wearing a crop top?” Bad looked over Eret for signs he was uncomfortable. All he found was a flustered, giggly, content person. So he continued.

Skeppy leaned closer, “Is he? Awww!”

Bad giggled again and released Eret’s hands to be able to squeeze and pinch his thighs while keeping his other hand teasing the man’s upper ribs, now attacking two of Eret’s most ticklish spots. “At least say hello~”

“WAHAHA- I WANTED TIHIHICKLES! BAHAHAD PLEHEHEHEASE!” Eret squeezed his eyes shut again, he knew he was reaching his limit even though he was enjoying every second of it.

Bad slowed his hands so he was rubbing away the ghost tingles. “And there we go, I never would have guessed!” He teased.

Skeppy got onto the bed with his two close friends and properly greeted the guest “Hello Eret! Good to see you again!” They both smiled and exchanged small talk for a while until Bad sat up.

“Ok everyone, cuddle-pile! Get in here you two, this is triple the aftercare for the brave one who took all those tickles like an absolute champ!”

And so everyone cuddled close, regained strength, and promptly took a nap.

———————————————————————

Whew! That took a while on my end, sorry about that by the way. I have another fic on the way! I’m still in a big dumb mood so it will probably take me a day or two!

As always, thank you so much for the ask and for reading my things! I love you all and have a great day💕❤️

#tickle fic #mcyt tickle fic #mcyt tickle #lee!Eret #Ler!bbh #Ler!badboyhalo #tickleask #tickleprompt #dsmp tickle fic

[shadowthestoryteller]

A Crosshair Analysis Because I Can

So

My thoughts have been on Twiggs recently (I mean when are the ever NOT on Crosshair) but that’s besides the point. 

What have I been thinking about? 

Why does Crosshair dislike Rex? Or, more broadly, why is Crosshair meaner than a snake at times?

I think the main reason he is so hostile with Rex is this: Rex pulled rank.

Here me out. 

If you watch that scene closely, the scene where Cody is down and Hunter is sniffing dirt, Crosshair is an abrasive little noodle but isn’t really outright hostile. He did taunt Jesse in the gunship, but another headcanon that I have is Crosshair purposefully pokes people with a stick to test their mettle (more on that later). Back to the Rex thing, Crosshair actually does not outright challenge Rex until Rex says “I’m in charge now”.

We know the Bad Batch only follows the orders of one person, and that’s Cody. The Bad Batch have never served under Rex, and now this random officer who doesn’t know them is trying to tell them what to do. Watch the scene closely and the moment Rex says “I’m in charge now” Crosshair’s eyes actually widen and his head rocks back a bit. He’s shocked at this, and spite quickly follows. THAT’S when he attacks Rex directly. And, much as I love Rex, looking through Crosshair’s eyes he’s got a point. If Rex is so capable, why were the Bad Batch called in? 

Now we all know what an absolute BAMF Rex is and how he’s not exactly shy about crazy plans (MF just up and ‘Then we’ll destroy the outpost instead!’ like bro wtf). But the Bad Batch does not know what he’s capable of. 

They are commandos, so basically space marines. From what I know about Marines, they are extremely dismissive of commanding figures immediately trying to take charage that they are not familiar with. Rank also doesn’t usually = respect for them either. They need to see what the officer is capable of first. In the case of Anakin, Cross seems to be chill with him (as a rifle owner, I know you dont let just anyone hold your rifle, that’s your baby) so my guess is either Cross knew of Anakin or Anakin didn’t pull rank the moment he met them. 

Crosshair needs proof the person he’s following is a capable fighter and wont endanger the squad. 

He wants to see if they’re weak willed or will stand up to him. And also that’s just who Crosshair is as a person, he enjoys getting people riled up because he knows Wrecker will defend him. But he does like to test people because you see a person’s true colors when they’re angry. Crosshair wants to figure if they’d be level headed in battle or if they’d jeopardize him and the team. 

This would translate into non-combat situations of course, but that’s a conversation for another time. 

I also theorize that Crosshair puts up his cold front kinda like an owl puffs up to make themselves bigger. Crosshair is not physically intimidating. He’s just not. So, he digs at someone first to let them know he’s not a pushover or weak. Only problem is he doesn’t know when to stop. 

Now, I am NOT trying to say “Oh Crosshair’s just misunderstood and is actually pure and a sweetheart!” No, he can be an outright asshole at times. His comments to Rex about Echo on Skakko Minor are completely and utterly uncalled for an the thud when Cross got knocked on his ass was immensely satisfying.  He’s also not some angel with an acidic tongue. 

He’s a complex character who’s got flaws and isn’t perfect, but a fun thing to remember in psychology is this: “The problem is never the problem”. Cross doesn’t get a free pass for his jackassery, I just like to think he’s got a deeper (even if subconscious) reason for his actions. 

Tags @soundwavetherav, @mackstrut @haloangel391 @iwannaclonetrooper  @kamino-mermaid @the11tailedlovesclones   @mangoberry43, @a-lil-perspective, @the-silentium, @thegoodbatch, @peacefulwizardfox, @passionofthesith, @apathetic-catastrophie   @honeyray @leonidas-banana-phone  @pearlyarmor  @queenchaos-5 @bomboclaaty

#stop outright hatin my boy #hes an ass but he isnt satan incarnate #crosshair #clone trooper crosshair #weve seen a grand total of an hour of footage for the bad bach #Rex hardly had all of his character arc in that amount of time #if im wrong and he is just an ass ill eat my words #but i doubt it #bad batch #the bad batch #clone force 99

[strawberrywritings]

Second problem.

A/N: I am an hour late to posting this and i haven’t proofread, but to make up for it: Señor Galindo makes another appearance! I honestly hope i managed to tag everyone because sometimes i lose a username (sorry in advance)🙈 

Hope you like this chapter, ad if you want, let me know what you think in my askbox xx 🍓

ps: look how cute Angel is when he sleeps!!!!!

/ Previous parts

The next hour and a half went by in a blur. You and Angel sat on the sofa as he proceeded to explain to you everything about what he did with the club: the drugs, the tunnels, his past, his mom. Multiple glasses of water later, there was a thick silence in the room, your arms were crossed over your chest as you stared everywhere but him, and he sat there defeated, because he knew what was coming: heartbreak.

He was the first to break the silence, “I opened up myself to you, please say something”. His voice was desperate and your heart ached. “I don’t know what to say. This is… a lot”, you had tears in your eyes, and he might not be a genius like EZ, but he could see how uncomfortable he had made you. And he hated himself for it. He nodded in understanding, and you spoke again, your voice wavering. “I just… I hope you can understand this isn’t easy for me”, rejection was coming Angels’ way, he was sure of it, so he did what he did best: building his walls back and acting as if he wasn’t breaking inside.

“It wasn’t easy for me to tell you all of that shit, either”, his voice got rougher and you looked at him, a frown on your face as your tone got firmer, too. “Well, I’m sorry I’m not used to all of this drug bullshit. – you looked at him, and while the strong façade you had put on started to crumble, Angel’s eyes stayed hard, staring into yours – I’m sorry I’m not from your world, I’m sorry I can’t understand what you’re going through. I can try, for you, but now I just need to come to terms with everything you told me. This may be just another day to you, but not for me. All I’m asking is some time”, you finished your rant with a sob, and his gaze softened at seeing you like that, he wanted to hug you so bad, but he was playing the role of the big bad biker and couldn’t get out of character now. El Pardino’s words echoed in his mind, “If she doesn’t accept it, you just let her go”. He was too afraid of losing you, and he thought that acting like this would make it hurt less. “Call me when you wanna talk”, he got up, making his way to the door and getting out of your house, not looking back.

You remained on the couch, the same couch you and Angel had spent so much time making out and cuddling on, it had become a place for sadness. You cried, and doubted your feelings towards him: was this a sign that it was best to break up with him? Could you take what came with this life? Would this happen again? That night, you couldn’t sleep. Every time you closed your eyes, your saw the pictures again, and every time it was hard to breath. Angel rode home, entering his apartment as if he was in a daze, he walked straight to the cupboard ad grabbed a bottle of tequila, drowning his feelings in alcohol and weed. He drank to escape his reality, to pretend that everything was fine, just for one night.

/

Angel arrived at the yard late, but when he did show up, everyone could see he looked like shit. He didn’t say a word to anyone and walked straight to the bar, asking Chucky for a bottle of water and some painkillers for his terrible headache. He kept quiet for most of the morning, and then lunchbreak came, so he sat at a random table and began eating. “Ain’t your girl coming around, today? – Coco spoke, plopping down next to his best friend – you could use some tlc to get that fucking shitty mood off yourself”. Angel winced at the mention of you, and Coco looked at him, his brows furrowed. “Nah, I’m good”, Angel replied and continued to eat; his friend kept quiet but looked at EZ, who just shook his head, signaling he also didn’t know what was going on.

In the afternoon, after work, EZ (poor guy, always babysitting and taking care of the others) had to snatch away his brother’s third beer, telling him to go home and get his shit together. That had made Angel scowl at him. “Mind your fucking business, prospect”, he spat the last word like it was an insult. Everyone was silent, not daring to challenge him if he was in a bad mood. Angel didn’t say anything else as he grabbed his stuff and stormed out the clubhouse, Coco going after him. “Hey, hermano, where ya going?”. “Home”. “Talk to me, c’mon”, Coco grabbed his arm and Angel yanked it away harshly, turning towards the other man and looking at him with angry eyes. “I told her everything and she said some shit about needing her space”, Angel huffed out and put his helmet on. “Everything?”. “Everything, Coco. And now I am alone again. I’d appreciate all of you not pouring salt into the wound and just letting me be”. He started his bike and sped off the parking lot, leaving a stunned Coco standing there. When he went back inside and relayed the information to his brothers, they all felt sorry for him and agreed that it would be best to leave him some time to cool off. Nonetheless, the old Angel was, seemingly, back.

/

You, on your end, weren’t doing much better. You had cried yourself to sleep on the couch, woke up late and had to rush to work. All day, you couldn’t think about anything other than the man that had been in your life for the past months. Luck didn’t seem to be on your side: as soon as the bell rang, marking the start of lunch time, you smelled a familiar cologne, and you turned just in time to see Miguel Galindo approaching you; he was wearing an almond-coloured suit with the usual white shirt underneath, perfectly complementing his skin. He invited you to have lunch with him at the same café you had been to a couple of weeks prior, and you figured you could use some distraction.

Miguel had done his homework: he had Nestor find out what he could about you, where you were from, what schools you attended, how you got to Santo Padre. Knowing all these things (but bringing them up in a way you wouldn’t be able to know he knew), it was easy for him to hold a conversation with you, even though he noticed how you seemed to space out from time to time.

“Is everything alright?”, he politely asked. You were brought out of your thoughts, and you softly smiled at him. “Yes, I’m sorry, I zoned out”, you apologetically smiled and shook your head. “Something’s bothering you?”, he asked, straightening up and leaning forward towards you. “Just… a rough night. Nothing that a good night of relax can’t fix”, you lied, still smiling at him and looking at the time on your phone. “I should probably get back, I have a class in 15 minutes”, you got up and gathered your things in your purse, grabbing the check, which was immediately snatched from your hand. “I’m not letting you pay, señorita. It was my pleasure to have lunch with you”, his hand brushed the small of your back, almost imperceptibly, and he said something to the waiter, who nodded and Miguel led you out of the place.

/

You were talking by the entrance of the school, just after the bell rang, when you heard the roar of a bike approaching. Instinctively, you averted your gaze from the man in front of you just in time for EZ to climb off his bike and spot you, and spot Miguel: Taza had sent him to see what was wrong with Angel.

“Hey”, he shortly greeted you with a smile, his eyes meeting Miguel’s, who was standing way too close to you for EZ’s liking. “Prospect – Miguel said, an amused smile on his face – what brings you here?”. “Family business, actually. – the prospect turned to you and smiled, completely ignoring the look on the other man’s face – got a minute?”. You nodded and turned to Miguel, “I’m sorry, I have to go”. “Don’t worry, we’ll catch up some other time”, he leaned in and kissed your cheek, a common greeting. EZ looked at the two of you with wide eyes, but as soon as he could, he dragged you over to where his bike was parked but didn’t let go of your arm. He asked you what happened with Angel and you gave him a brief explanation, you really didn’t want to think about last night, or Angel, at all at the moment, and he felt it, too, so he let you be.

“And what the hell was that? Galindo? Really?”, he crossed his arms on his chest and you did the same, not liking the implications of his tone. “It was just lunch. God forbid I relax for an hour, eh? You and club have all these girls around, ready to throw themselves at you – and don’t say it’s not true or it doesn’t matter, Ezekiel. I’ve seen the way they look at y’all, at Angel… I had a shitty night and for once someone manages to get my mind off that, and it’s a problem?”, tears were threatening to spill from your eyes, all the emotions you held inside, spilling out. He never meant to insinuate something, and the fact that you were feeling like shit, just like his brother, meant that the discussion had taken a toll on you, too. Still, it didn’t change the fact that it was Miguel Galindo who helped you take your mind off of Angel.

You sniffled and lowered your head to regain some composure, first of all, because you were in public and secondly because you knew that your outburst to EZ was uncalled for, and he didn’t deserve it. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to. – you said and he nodded, his gaze was full of understanding, but you still felt bad – I have to go, now. I’ll see you”, and with that, you made your way to your car and left. EZ followed your car with his eyes, and when he was sure you couldn’t see him, he got out his phone and called his brother. “Angel, you gotta get your girl back, rápido”.

taglist @scuzmunkie​ @ifoundmyhappythought​ @starrynite7114​ @angelreyesgirl​ @my-rosegold-soul​ @claytoncardenasbabymama​ @peaches007​ @chibsytelford​ @thickemadame​ @mrsjaxtellerfan​ @cocotheclown​ @elcococruz​ @woahitslucyylu​ @everyhowlmarksthedead​ @justahopelessssromantic​ @gemini0410​ @imagineredwood​ @samcrobae​ @enamoured-x​ @enamouravecleslivresetlechocolat​ @brattyfics​ @blessedboo​ @sadeyesgf​ @rebel-without-cause-x​ @general-tiny-mouse​ @thesandbeneathmytoes​ @wrcn9fvlcver​ @ly--canthrope​ @soaronmywings​ @cind-in-real-life​ @danie1432​ @briannab1234​ @spookys-girl​ @blackmissfrizzle​

#angel reyes x reader #angel reyes imagine #mayans mc imagine #my writing #a series of firsts

[dl4draws]

hi there!

lil' preface so i don't come off as a weirdo: i'm somewhat new to tumblr shenanigans™ so idk if it's just normal that awesome writers and artists share a bit of their progress for creating something, but you're the only blog i've witnessed doing it so you're getting this ask.

i absolutely love it here. getting to listen to (or read about?) someone's projects in the works feels like such an awesome thing! you're sharing this passion of yours with us and letting us experience this joy with you?? you're letting us see little doodles and headcanons and even a playlisy?? OMG

again, idk if that's normal on here but to me (someone who does everything on their own because who would care about my silly little craft?) this is absolute pure generosity and kindness on your part and i will never not praise that. i can't really put into words what i'm trying to say here because as much as i love the english language, it's not my first language and i just don't know how to express this properly. i guess what i want to say is thank you? thank you for all the happiness you share, thank you for letting us come on this journey with you and thank you for talking about your passion. that's a scary thing to do but whenever i see someone doing that i will 100% always sit there and listen to them talk about something they care about a lot (even if i don't understand a single thing about the topic) and try to interact and let them know that someone always cares about their thoughts and projects, even if it's just a stranger on the internet, because i know what it's like to run against a wall of indifference and i don't want anyone to feel like that.

keep talking about things that bring you joy and keep sharing them, someone's always going to support you and cheer you on and get excited with you!

this got a lot longer than i wanted it to be but my point is you're amazing and keep doing what you do, no matter how much you want to share of it or how long it takes! there's always going to be support and someone who appreciates you and your work.

idk if this should be anon or not because i don't want to seem so incredibly weird and out of place with my long stupid ask here-- this feels so uncalled for

take this virtual hug

hi hi hi good morning, I am throwing my reputation away and say I’m about to cry

Okay so I’m answering this bit by bit! I don’t think it’s that rare to see a content creator share stuff about their writing/art! At least with the people I’ve surrounded myself, there’s always sneaky posts here, reblogs with tags and stuff about their characters! It’s always so much fun to see those, see people share little details about their work is always fascinating to me! Personally I adore sharing the process because I am having Too Much fun and being extremely chaotic and I think it’s cool to share me having only half a braincell with you all lol

I’m so glad you like it here in my little corner of tumblr!!! I’m not an oversharer in any aspect of my life usually but with aus i go full beast mode and start talking and good luck shutting me up lmao as of right now I don’t really have time for full drawings (which is exactly why the hanahaki au isn’t already finished). Getting to doodle for this au has helped me with wanting to draw but not being exactly able to, and with getting stuff off my mind! I’m not very forgetful but with ideas I usually think about them, have a Good Laugh tm, proceed to think about it for half an hour and then forget about it, unless I scream about it to someone (or just make a post and announce it to you all).

One thing u might not know about me is that I make playlists for everything. If u go through my spotify playlist you’ll see many playlist, but I have so many secret ones bakshssk making a playlist for an au or for a fic (sometimes I make playlists for fics I read!)

I absolutely adore hearing about everyone’s ideas, like you said, listening to someone talk about something they’re passionate about is always so fascinating!! And it makes me so happy to see that someone trusts me enough to open their mind and share their ideas with me, even if (again like you said) I understand nothing of the topic! Honestly I am extremely thankful for you, and everyone who has ever interacted with me or my silly ideas. It hypes me up so much to see you all liking and sending me stuff about it (every time I get a random ask about something I said, or a headcanon or anything 25 years are added to my life ngl). I never thought people would enjoy my aus, be it the hanahaki one or the street racing one (or the beauty and the beast one!!!) You guys really are amazing!! And I totally get what you mean with running with a wall of indifference, I’ve been there and it’s not fun, but I’ve learned who to share with and who not to share with, and that’s okay (for me). I’m not a very good talker but I’ve been told I’m good listener, so if anyone ever has any problems, anything they’d like to talk about please never hesitate on sending me an ask or a message!! (zukka wingfic anon I’m still thinking about you)

Nooooo, please I didn’t find this weird at all!!!! I actually feel so flattered I haven’t been able to stop smiling :D it makes me so happy to see you enjoy my silly content, and that makes me want to create more of it!!!

I hope you have a wonderful day/night, and know that I’ll be thinking about this all month hakahaksb

#thank you so much for taking the time to send this #it truly makes me so very happy to see people enjoy what I do #call it doodles call it little silly hc #i haven’t been this happy in a while and it’s starting to show in my everyday life #making content for u all is making me so incredibly happy #thank you so so so much #really #batcavewitch #🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤