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welldrawnfish · 7 months

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So these last few days has been.. Turbulent. DIFFERENT

I think I may be a System? Infact I KNOW I am a system at this point, but Im also not ready to accept that. Well a part of me isnt, and the other parts of me are like… uh duh of course you are.

*A system in this context refers to the collective consciousness under the DID / OSDD Umbrella, I dont know the correct terminology in all of this, so im so sorry If i I mess up. I don’t necessarily want to give myself a label, there's .. brain scans and stuff I can get to prove it. And I need those, thats the only way I know this is real. But for now, for my own mental health I am treating it as if it were.. “real “ And I dont really know… what to expect…? I want to find something, ANYTHING, on I guess.. Systems waking up? But I cant find it. So I’ll just do this here Im gonna dump out all our thoughts onto some comic pages and we will figure it out. I had a bit of an awakening roughly.. 5 days ago, and for the sake of convenience gonna use Plural/System terminology - There are alters, I have met them, the have names and personalities and some of them are really fuckin annoying i just want to punch him in his TEETH

Anyways, since the alter awakening moment, my brain has been in TURMOIL parts of me accept this, parts of me dont, i keep feeling like my face is like shifted 2 inches to the right and everything gets fuzzy in the real world. Not that these alters have names like.. Files are getting sorted into these proper figures and everything is getting explained and figured out. And its making me feel like I'm not me anymore?

Like I always would argue and barter and fight with my own thoughts, but that's the thing, they wer thoughts, voices in my head with just like, distinct personalities. I just saw it as a different part of me?? Figured that was normal.

But now they are.. stronger ? OR maybe because i'm more aware of them and the personalities I can tell whos out now and like.. Obviously they are happy to get some facetime with the world properly?? But like.. Am *I* just aware of it, aware of them now, aware that it is not just *I* but *We* and so noticing it more, I'm resisting even harder? We feel more fractured than ever.

I have a good friend helping me out, another system, I owe them everything, maybe my life. (PLEASE FOLLOW @transpanda-1 BTW THEY DESERVE IT) They had a few amazing tips, but I cant keep bugging them about every anxiety on my mind thats not fair, so I’ll ask the whole community.

I guess what I want to know is.. Like is this normal? Do all systems go through this? What should I expect in the future and how do I make this more streamlined and stop.. Fighting it? I guess?

I thought I finally had myself figured out, just be the girl who makes the funny relatable trans comics… it was simple.

#did/osdd #osdd system #did osdd #did system #did community #osddid #alters #PLEASE HELP #webcomic #comics #original comic #comic art #web comic #Welldrawnfishcomic

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misscammiedawn · 15 days

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You may have discussed it before, but would you mind speaking a little bit on how you discovered you have DID?

I feel like I have a pretty stable core identity but there have been times under intense stress where I’ve experienced sudden “switches” in my personality. During a particularly bad period for a little over a year there was a time where I distinctly felt like a different person and did things I wouldn’t normally do, and I remember the specific moment where I came back into my body and became “me” again. This doesn’t happen often, but it has happened more than once throughout my life. When I see people talk about plurality I feel a little confused because their identities often seem to have their own names and genders and ages and backstories, and it seems so cut-and-dry.

I know these are all things to discuss with my therapist but I love how you talk about your own experiences. How can you differentiate between DID and other kinds of dissociation?

Thank you for asking, anon! I'm glad you are going to talk to your therapist about it while also doing the reading and reaching out-- heaven knows our own journey within the US mental healthcare system was rocky at best. The latest chapter of Madison/Belladonna is heavily sourced from IRL circumstances both in receiving the diagnosis and the decades long journey in the mental healthcare system to get there.

But to answer more directly-- (as always we are answering from a psychopathology lens for care and treatment, we recognize the beauty of plurality and do not reduce ALL experiences to mental healthcare concerns, we are approaching our own situation and experiences this way as it is how we lived it)

Our journey was guided from the outside. Both therapists and our partner who was able to see these "mood swings" in us were able to gently guide us to water despite our fierce denial and rejection of our situation. What started as "we're fine" turned to "mood swings" turned to "BPD" turned to "---maybe we should read up on OSDD?" Turned to our current therapist telling us over a year ago that we had DID after months of testing and interviewing to determine.

I should also note I likely realized it MULTIPLE times in my history and buried it again and again. I legitimately think that people in my former life knew and either assumed I knew too or worse I had told them and forgot that I told them. It worries me because I cannot ever be certain. I once asked my ex-wife about it after the divorce/diagnosis and she did say it was weird how she had a "different husband" depending on environment and social group. She said she never noticed it during the interactions, but she would always think back and feel that the "me" in any given moment was different from the ones she observed in social/work situations etc.

So like--- even if people notice, sometimes they don't even realize what they're seeing. Honestly I go full No Mask at work even when a male part fronts and no one really bats an eye. I don't think *most* people are as observant as we worry they are.

ANYWAY! Looking back these are the signs that I ignored:

- I not just wrote a consistent journal through every phase of my life (even going as far as to have a "memory list" that I populated "when I felt like it" (<- IE: when a part that associated with the memory was fronting and wanted to type about it) and more importantly I READ it. Often. I sometimes think that the majority of our memories are just imagined versions of what we wrote. That notion is helped by the fact we [used to] stop journaling during times of crisis or delete journal/chat log to prevent us thinking about distressing things.

- I wrote a lot of plural characters in my stories since my teenage years. Kinda like I kept writing female versions of myself? Funny how the Trans and DID acceptance arcs are so dang similar.

- I would emotionally cave in on myself after gatherings, berating myself for how I had acted all evening. Getting deeply upset at how "out of control" I was. We outright AVOID mood altering substances like alcohol or weed.

- When talking about traumatic memories we typically just tell the story rote. It doesn't bother us. We told therapists without batting an eyelid. This is dissociation. We were disconnecting ourselves from our memories. Emotionally distancing ourselves from the experiences.

- In the same vein, when we remember things we imagine things in locations like a 3rd person camera. Not populated. We don't hear or feel or associate. It's just a place and a knowledge. Our whole "context packet" thing where we just understand something without *feeling* it.

- Deleted emails and chatlogs, references to things we don't remember. Discord messages with people we don't remember talking to. It bothers me how many people in our online communities we were actually close to at some stage of our life and then erased. This is specific to us but Dawn has opened many accounts in the hypnokink community and Camden has shut them down and this has happened so many times that we don't even get upset when we find a buried email from 2013 with sign-up to a Yahoo Email account we don't remember having. That sounds dramatic. It's more just. Go into your emails, pull stuff up from 5-10 years ago and just scroll a while. See how much you remember and associate into. It's NORMAL to forget what websites you were browsing a decade ago. It's not normal to have an entire *LIFE* you hid from yourself.

- Sometimes people just... saw/knew us before we did and there were times when they would describe a version of us they weren't supposed to see and we got complete dysphoria over it. Sometimes it as joyful. Someone we love saw Cammie well enough to say when we transitioned that they wanted to see that "windswept girl with the big smile" all of the time. Sometimes it's mortifying, like when someone approaches Camden as if she is Dawn and Camden REJECTED that side of us so heavily that it caused emotional meltdowns and turmoil because Camden didn't WANT to be a sexy confident domme, she could barely see herself as a woman, when people saw the wrong version of us *without permission* it was just a violation that made things WORSE.

- On that note-- meltdowns-- we mentioned the whole "after a social gathering we'd emotionally cave in on ourselves" thing, there was a lot of that. After work we'd get a complete drop from having to be in Manager Mode all day or we'd have a crisis after erotic intimacy encounters because we're sex repulsed ace. The fact is our nervous system was activated during those times, our survival instincts were kicked in and brought the part associated to the surface to DEAL and when they backed off our body was still reacting to the trauma trigger and it would cause us to implode.

All of these things in therapy brought us to the conclusion of BPD. Because therapists be like that at times. A *TRAUMA* therapist gave us some DES-II, MID and ACE tests and worked out what was going on within 3 months.

It took a further 6-9 months with constant support from loved ones who were able to see us as individuals to *ACCEPT* it. This is a denial disorder, it doesn't want to be found. Asking questions, being honest and being accepting is the best way to come to terms with it. I wish it were easier and I wish you luck and support in your journey. Our inbox is always open!

You're not alone <3

#cammie asks #DID #dissociative identity disorder #watch me post my trauma in public

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that-system-feel · 23 days

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Intro

This blog is for systems who want to send in funny circumstances that come up with one's system!

This blog is endo safe. There is no set DNI, but the following rules apply:

- No NSFW asks, and if you have an NSFW blog, follow and interact from a different blog. This is a comfort thing for us.

- Anti-endos may interact so long as they do not bring any discourse or aggression to this blog. The blog is meant to be fun for everyone.

- Radqueers may interact so long as they do not bring any of the drama or discourse to this blog. Basically, you can send stuff in about your system, but don't discuss anything that could cause controversy or anything.

- Singlets are free to follow, but please do not send in any asks! If you have any questions about plurality, there are several other blogs that are open to answering questions from well-meaning singlets.

- If anyone makes us feel uncomfortable, we will freely use the block button.

Anon signoffs are allowed!

If you want to help mod the blog, send us a DM!

About the Mods

Mod 🐺

We're a non-disordered mixed endogenic and traumagenic system. We saw another blog which was similar to this one, but was anti-endo. We made this blog so that we and others like us would have a space to send in our fun system moments.

Tags

All asks will either be tagged as "that system feel" or "not a system feel"

All warnings will be tagged with "tw __" (For our own comfort, we will add warnings to posts with swearing)

#that system feel #not a system feel #intro post #blog intro #system #system stuff #system things #plural #plural community #plural system #plurality #pluralgang #plural things #endo safe #endo friendly #pro endo #endogenic safe #endogenic friendly

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orange-orchard-system · 2 months

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Somehow ended up talking to a pluralphobic family member about plurality today (in an instance unrelated to my previous posts about family). I got them to be a bit more open to the idea by explaining collective identities and fronting; I couldn't get a full explanation out of them, but it seems one of their main issues with systems was just not knowing who they were talking to at any given moment. Once they were told "You can ask who's fronting or just default to their collective identity.", they were much more receptive to it. After that, we also talked a tiny bit about barriers to diagnosis and how misleading data on DID can be if you just take it at face value (ex. how rare DID seems before you take into account how many people out of a hundred 1-3% of the population is).

It was a tense conversation on our side, but... I'm a little more hopeful about them. I'm gonna try to introduce them to more plural stuff slowly, get them to loosen up and understand that systems can be just like anyone else. Not sure what to talk about to them next, though... maybe that we used to date a system? Or maybe we'll dig up our old plurality 101 presentation

This, again, doesn't have anything to do with my previous posts about plurality and family. But it would be really funny if I solved the issue I was talking about by getting the pluralphobic family member to not be pluralphobic anymore; I was not expecting an opportunity to untangle the other side of this issue. I can only hope I don't mess it up

#bvie.txt #pluralgang #plurality #actuallyplural #plural system #front soup.txt #did #actuallydid

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sophieinwonderland · 5 months

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The Plurality of... Blue Beetle! (Movie)

Plurality: A state of multiple self-conscious agents, or "headmates," sharing a single body.

Oh, this one is going to be a little rough!

If you know the Blue Beetle, it shouldn't be surprising that they're a plural character. We've never read Blue Beetle comics, but my host was pretty familiar with Blue Beetle from Young Justice, where Jaime had a pretty big role in season 2.

I went into Blue Beetle with high hopes and, if I'm honest, ended up a little disappointed.

But before we can get into why I felt that way, let's first talk about their plurality!

Spoilers for the Blue Beetle movie ahead:

Jaime Reyes and Khaji-Da as plural characters

In the movie, Khaji-Da, often referred to as just "The Scarab," is a world-destroying weapon that found its way to Earth.

It bonds with Jaime Reyes when he touches it, fusing to his flesh and turning him into the Blue Beetle in an elaborate body horror sequence.

Khaji is established as a sentient being, and is able to communicate with Jaime mentally. Now, it's not actually clear if Jaime can communicate back mentally like many real headmates can. Every time he talks to Khaji is aloud, which I think was also how it was in Young Justice too. It's possible that while the Scarab can send messages to Jaime's mind, it can't read it. But that seems kind of a strange limitation when the movie shows it gaining access to a person's full memory after connecting with them, and is at least able to figure out Jaime's name through their connection.

It would seem weird to me if talking out loud to Khaji was necessary to be heard, but that's how the movie presents it. (This could be a comfort thing too. As part of a plural system, I'll admit we'll often talk out loud through the body when nobody is around to hear us. Words can be clearer than pure thoughts.)

A small part of the movie is dedicated to the two learning to get along, with there being some conflict around Khaji wanting to kill an enemy, and Jaime saying that they aren't killers.

This leads to an important moment later in the movie where Jaime is enraged, believing he's lost multiple family members, and is going to execute the villain.

The word "execute" is important here, because while other good characters have no problem killing (their nana took great joy in it, in fact), it's always against active combatants. Not someone who was disarmed. The movie doesn't make this distinction directly, but I think it's an important one.

It's one thing for superheroes to kill to protect themselves and others, most heroes are willing to these days, but it's another for them to kill someone who isn't actively a threat anymore.

Kahji takes just enough control to hold Jaime back from doing something he would regret, repeating back that they aren't killers, showing itself capable of learning from Jaime.

It's a cool moment, and I appreciated this little character growth.

Despite Khaji being sentient and capable of learning though...

Khaji isn't treated as a character

This was my disappointment with the movie.

Blue Beetle should have been more of a plural story, but Khaji is hardly ever treated as a character by the narrative or the other characters.

Yes, Khaji gets some funny lines here and there, ("Host overreacting" being a favorite of mine) but doesn't seem to have any real motivation, interests or really anything going for it.

And what's worse... there's not even a REAL CONVERSATION between Jaime and Khaji. Even when they really should be discussing things.

Like...

The Rooftop Scene

At one point, the bad guys have found Jaime's family. Jaime tried to activate his powers. They don't work. What's a Beetle to do?

Well, Jaime decided that since the Scarab will try to protect him, the best bet will be to JUMP OFF THE ROOF!

And while this is sorta well-reasoned, I found myself internally screaming this entire to time to just ask it to change.

Like, Khaji can talk. They literally said in the scene right before that Khaji was sentient.

And while jumping off the roof made for a dramatic scene, it eliminated what could have been a great moment with Jaime explaining the importance of his family and his need to protect them to Khaji.

It forced Khaji to help, when Kahji may have been perfectly willing to help if Jaime just talked to it, instead of trying to make Kahji to do what he wanted.

And you might wonder, does Khaji get offended at Jaime risking his life to force Khaji into doing what he wants? I wonder that too, because this moment is never mentioned again in the movie.

For a film so much about family, Khaji is never part of that

Blue Beetle is a movie centered around family.

It's about Jaime's relationship with his family who is very close, almost suffocating but in a good way. Jaime is driven to protect and fight for his family at every turn, and his family will do anything to protect him.

This is contrasted with the Kord family which is dysfunctional and broken, and Carapax who lost his family and sees familial love as a weakness.

These themes are intricately woven into the narrative.

So it is so disappointing how utterly divorced from that theme Khaji-Da ended up.

There is a great story to be told about this extraterrestrial machine that crashes to Earth, never having a family of its own or a concept of what family means, only to be bonded to Jaime and go from being treated as something to be gotten rid of to be welcomed as another member of Jaime's family.

That would be really cool. And they seemed willing to tell a similar story with Jenny Kord, being brought into the family group hug after everything was over.

But Khaji is treated less like a valued member of the family and more like an accessory. And even when Jaime fully bonds with Khaji, it's not about agreeing to integrate and share a mind so much as it's accepting his heroic destiny.

This feels like a huge missed opportunity for the type of story they were telling, and a betrayal of that story's central themes.

Jaime's Mother Addressing Khaji

This is the one exception where a character who wasn't Jaime actually treated Khaji as a person.

She first asks what Khaji's name was. Then says...

I know you can hear me, Khaji-Da. I want you both to get it together. Find your strength, mijito. Use the pain we’re feeling and turn it into power. I want you to go back in there… And kick their asses!

I love this so much. I love the mother's character for thinking to acknowledge Khaji as its own person and talk to it directly, giving her pep talk to both of them at once.

It's a fantastic scene. An incredible moment.

But it's also still treating Khaji as a weapon. The one and only time a character who isn't Jaime talks to Khaji, it's telling Khaji to go fight people.

I'm glad to have gotten this. But I feel they could have done so much more.

Khaji's feelings are never explored

We're told that the Scarab is a planet-destroying super weapon. How does Khaji feel about that?

We don't know. It never comes up.

Does Khaji have memories of worlds it's destroyed?

Does it know why it was created or who created it?

If it doesn't know those things, does the lack of awareness scare it?

Can it feel fear, and if Jaime asked if it was scared, would it understand the emotion?

The fact that these things weren't explored at all leaves me with one important and sad conclusion.

The writers weren't interested in writing a plural character

Blue Beetle's plurality is an afterthought.

The Scarab was sentient and Blue Beetle would use "we" pronouns occasionally because Khaji is sentient in the comics. But the relationship between the two wasn't a priority of the writers.

And in my opinion, the film suffered for it. Not just from a plural perspective but from a writing perspective. The film would have been so much better had Khaji been treated more like a character rather than just a weapon and plot device.

Khaji stopping Jaime from killing needed more build-up, and Khaji needed and deserved to be better integrated with the story's central themes of family.

Conclusion

All in all, I feel that Blue Beetle was a good movie. But I also feel its treatment of Khaji held it back from being a great movie.

I hope I don't come off as too hard on this particular movie. There's a lot of media that, when less explicitly plural, I might be more forgiving of. I once wrote a whole post about why I thought Kronk was plural based on his angel and demon Kronks who never get any sort of character arcs. But those aren't intended to be sentient people by the writers. Instead, they're plural by happenstance, simply by being more developed than other shoulder angels and demons in cartoons.

Meanwhile, Khaji Da is supposed to be a full character, I went in expecting a lot, and I feel Khaji just didn't live up to its potential in this movie.

I look forward to seeing what DC does with the character in the future, and if Khaji can get more development.

And I'm sad that, given the box office, it's probably not going to get a sequel of its own. I'm sure the planned Reach story would have given Khaji some much needed character development.

For more of me rambling about the plurality of DC superheroes, see: The Plurality of... Batman (Failsafe).

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indigochromatic · 1 month

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Another One Of Those Advice-for-New-Systems Posts

Saw one of these going around recently and got inspired. I wouldn't call this advice list the "evil edition", more like the... "do no harm but take no shit" edition X'D

Be on each other's team first, before anything else. Everything gets easier when you're facing it together.

Trying to avoid being (or looking) cringe is a fool's errand. If you would have to bend yourselves into a conciliatory pretzel in order to make a person like you or a social circle accept you, those people are not worth your time.

When you inevitably get hit with episodes of anxious system-doubt, (it's a pretty universal experience, I promise), take a second to pause. What's the longest span of time you've had so far without any "system stuff" (comments in co-con, switches, notes left for you, etc) happening? Say it's a week. Take that time span, double it, and then tell yourself that you are not allowed to seriously, actually start doubting until that long from now (e.g. 2 weeks). "But I'm so sure I'm definitely just faking it!" okay, hey, alright--if that's true, it'll still be true in 2 weeks. You can wait to find out, it's okay.

Be kind to everything in your head anyways, even in the middle of a doubt episode, because that's equally important for singlets to do and not just limited to systems. "Just part of me talking to myself" is as worthy of respect and kindness as an autonomous system member.

Also, keep notes somewhere of Hilariously Plural stuff that happens to you. It'll be good reassurance, but even more importantly, it'll be really funny to look back on later.

Labels are tools to help you communicate your experiences, not boxes you have to sort yourselves into.

The magic question isn't about labels or validity or trauma. It's "What do we need? What do each of us need, individually? What support would help us?"

Don't get too caught up in online system communities. Especially 1) endless tilting-at-windmills debates, and 2) advice channels and feeling obligated to give advice and emotional support to everyone who looks like they might want it. (Note: it's not bad to give advice, but it can be very easy to make a habit of overextending yourselves to care for others instead of yourselves--quite often because your own problems are hard and scary, bc otherwise you would have solved them already, and other peoples' issues can feel a lot more tractable and easier to address.)

Do find people and communities where you feel safe to be yourselves, and where people get to know you for your interests and perspectives and senses of humor, not only for your demographic labels.

It's okay to not know everything or figure everything out right away. There will be changes, there will be surprises, and that's good and normal and part of being alive.

Have fun on purpose. Lean into having fun with being a system, even if fun moments are rare and fleeting at first. Make in-jokes, encourage each other's angsty poetry habits, leave each other notes (even if you share memories), end up with massive crushes on each other, daydream together, hold each other when one (or more) of you is sad. Find things about each other you're grateful for, that you admire and want to learn from, that you enjoy.

#L.txt #I think S would probably agree with what I said though #system stuff #hope folks have fun with this

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plural-swag-competition · 1 year

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MOON KNIGHT SYS PROPAGANDA TIMEEEEE WOOOOO (made as a submission due to length ehehe :-D )

I love these duders sm n they have sm swag!! For one the comic the images for their pic r taken from is the Lemire run, a run with immense swag for being one of the best explorations of their systemhood and dynamics and understanding of themselves to date.

It’s also a masterclass in comics as a medium, blending various artstyles to show the distinction and overlap between various headmates as they encounter trials and tribulations and are thrown through a mental loop, their worlds in headspace distinct and tailored and yet blending into each other.

It also features one of my favorite characters! A headmate that only shows up in this run (but should come back bc I miSS HIMM and he has sm to oFFERR), who’s a spaceman who fights werewolves on the moon in their headspace, accompanied by a factive of one of the system’s best friends :-D (the guy w the mustache)

He’s a fictive based on a childhood action figure/imaginary game play, one that can be seen when we have a flashback to Marc and Steven interacting when the system was younger, showing just how long they’ve supported each other in life and how close they are :-)

While their history in publication has been fraught with ableism, accentuating the public misunderstandings of plurality and DID specifically, they’ve grown and developed as characters through it all and have managed to carve out a really important space for plural/system/DID rep in the mainstream, making amazing stories along the way!

The MCU show slammed, showing a super important narrative around system discovery, struggles, acceptance, and love, headmate support, internalized and external ableism, free choice and the determination of the self in the face of eugenics, introject personhood, and so much more.

Plus! Beyond the complexities and importance of them as a system, they’re also just a group of strange, flawed, guys who dress up in a funny little white cape and punch GHOSTS and VAMPIRES (and also befriend sentient man-eating houses) all while figuring their life out!!! And that’s pretty swag to me.

So as I leave you with a fun little Jake moment from the also wonderful current MacKay run (truly check it out!) let’s Tokyo drift into this final, and get this moon bread people!

#submission #moon knight #asks #propaganda #OMG there's a read more.

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queerautism · 10 months

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Bruh hiding on anon so they don't get me but literally the first post on that endo hate blog is making fun of someone for talking about roleplay fiction? Literally all they said was that it's funny the difference how you can slip into a character but not force yourself to become/act like another headmate? We're a disordered system and WE rp with friends and uh, yeah, it's a lot easier to get into the groove of writing a random static character than it is to try to perfectly imitate a headmate, even when it's literally a fictive of the same person. I can write Bakugo fine, but fuck if I can just casually mask into our Katsuki/make him switch in at a moments notice.

Like. These blogs often do just devolve into demonizing random shit (see also: the usual "you're faking if you have too many headmates/too many fictives/use this terminology" nonsense) and end up attacking the ~rEaL~ systems they claim to be protecting, but I've never seen one start off that way so blatantly.

But uh yeah, sure, writing with friends and having a good flowstate for your muse of question apparently means you're faking your system now. Who the fuck knew 🙄

Yeah they're posting stuff that has literally nothing wrong with it. They're making up a guy to be mad at basically. Plus posting systems that are not endogenic anyway, which just proves that sysmeds will call any inclusive plural an endo as an insult whenever it suits them. As long as they call someone an endo it's fair game to be as shitty as they want to them apparently.

The RP shit is so funny to us though, because as a traumagenic system, we definitely got one of our fictives from writing RP for a specific character. They can be two very different experiences, or someone can feel their RP writing is somehow related to their plurality. Who cares?

It's really such a bad fucking blog

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anti-endo-haven · 1 month

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We know your on break for a bit ans feel free to delete this we just have to get it off our head

Cw: fake claiming, doubting sys validity, r/syscringe mention, religion mention, religious trauma mention

We occasionally go scrolling through r/syscringe. Not because we agree, we whole heartedly HATE it. But sometimes for shits ans giggles, you know?

We were clicking through the pictures on a post and number 3. A number we already have a fuck ton of trauma with due to events and things happening with that number.

A post from our main. We were making a joke because lately, our boyfriend's been asking what fandoms we know. And we've been busy and been blurry so not everyone knows names. Hell I suck on names. So we'd describe shit weird. The movie Wonka?

We called it the candy fucker. He was like wtf? A reasonable response. So, who we're 95% sure now was like Le, went "hey he could've been!" So our bf, worried a bit, asked who was fronting. So, I quoted it and posted it.

We were being laughed ar especially because well, no real system would do that. This part was a little funny, they said that came from a blog like plural culture is or trauma holder culture is. No it's our personal kinda shit posty.

I've been doubting how valid we are. We've got some who think they were split because of religious trauma and our grandfather scaring the life into us through the Bible. And I know it's bad but I kinda doubt them because it wasn't as bad as others.

I've been doubting because it's like I'm perma frontstuck. I'm never not fronting. The rare times I do is when I have a blackout because, as Le explained, for some reason I'm not really ready to remember what inside is like. I know the basis but not details. This didn't help any

We hallucinate already, at least I do. It's usually Lu, Le, or Al who have to tell me I'm seeing things that aren't real. What if I'm hallucinating us being a system? What if we are but I'm not sure on things?

I'm sorry for venting Shining, really. Feel free to delete this we just had to get it off our chest

🌌🕷

Not deleting it, you’re here and I hear you. I see you. You’re valid in your experiences.

r/systemscringe does not give anyone a right to tell you how you can or can’t act when the majority of them don’t even believe in the disorder. Systems can act in a variety of ways and you posting a funny moment from your own doesn’t make you any less real.

The thing with your religious trauma, it is and was bad enough. Don’t compare it and say that it wasn’t bad enough when it was and is.

I know that I can’t diagnose you, but you are still valid and are a system. If you’d want, I can send a PDF for the DSM-5-TR and you can scroll through that for the dissociative disorders as a means of reminding yourself of what’s there.

It was bad enough. You aren’t any less of a system. You are valid. You’re not fake.

Don’t let a subreddit try and make you think that you’re not. It’s extremely hard not to let it get to you, but avoid the subreddit for as long as you can. I know it might be compelling to look there, but it has already caused you harm.

Take care of yourself. You’re important. I don’t believe you’re faking. If the denial is bad, try and do some things to help ground yourself and see if you can make a list of what happens to further help you know that you are not faking.

Even as someone who has hallucinations (and a lot of them), we have it to where we try and say when something is an auditory hallucination or not. It doesn’t feel like something we say. The crying and screaming and any whispered voices don’t sound like they’re coming from any alters or from us/the body at all, it feels detached in a way that isn’t dissociation detachment. I know it can be different and/or hard for others to do that.

It’ll be okay. Put yourself first and make sure to take care of yourself. I’m sorry that everything has hit you suddenly. I’m here for you. 🫂 /wc

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dai-bendu-conlang · 1 year

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hi! i just recently stumbled across this project and first off, massive fan of what y'all are doing here! (linguistics <3)

but i was wondering if there was any particular reason you've only created the one pronoun for second person, as opposed to separating the singular and plural as you've done with the rest? it just reads a bit funny to me as an ESL speaker, so i was curious as to your thought process ^^

i hope you all have a good day! (and that i'm making sense, it is... rather late here oops)

Hi! Assuming you’re referring to “keel” if I inferred this correctly?

We chose this to be representative of community. I have a half finished essay on our pronouns floating around (but as you can tell, we’re all not really into Star Wars anymore) and the section on that is pretty much:

This sense of community is also mirrored in the use of the singular and plural second person pronoun keel. The reason why Dai Bendu has only one word for those two pronouns is highlighting the role a single person plays in a community. As a culture that abhors leaving people without support, and has made it their very mission to improve the galaxy, the idea of a person being alone is absolutely terrible. Their grammar reflects that. Addressing a singular you also always means addressing the plural you, the community they stem from. This is also something the Jedi practice themselves. In Rogue Planet, after Anakin got into trouble, it is not just him that has to attend a disciplinary hearing but Obi-Wan too.

Mace was unrelenting. "I ask again, what was your error?"

“I brought shame upon the order and the Temple," Anakin responded quickly now, his voice high and soft.

"That is hardly precise. Again, your error?"

"To break the laws of the municipality, and. . and..."

“No!" Mace declared, and his smile vanished, replaced by a stern expression, like the dark underside of a cloud heretofore painted by sun. Anakin flinched.

"Obi-Wan, explain to your Padawan his error. It does, after all, arise from the same roots as your own." Mace regarded Obi-Wan with a lifted brow.

Obi-Wan considered this intently for a long moment before answering. Nobody tried to rush him. Inner truth was a perilous journey, even for a Jedi.

"I see it," he said. "We both want certainty."

Anakin stared at his master with a puzzled frown.

"Explain to us all how you have failed your Padawan," Mace said, gently enough, considering the turnabout in the proceedings.

"He and I are far too young for the luxury of certainty," Obi-Wan began. "Our experience is insufficient to earn us even momentary peace. As well, I have been more concerned with his growth than my own, distracted by his obvious flaws, rather than using his mirror to guide me, so that I may in turn guide him."

Your actions and the way you behave reflect upon your entire community as they brought you up and raised.

From Power of the Jedi Sourcebook:

"When a Jedi behaves badly in public, an observer might think, 'If this Jedi is a representative of the whole Order, then plainly no Jedi is worth respect.' On meeting a second Jedi, who behaves better than the first, that same person might think, 'Does this say that half the Jedi are good, and half bad?' On meeting a third Jedi, who behaves as well as the second, the person thinks, 'Was the first Jedi an exception, then?' In this way, only by the good behavior of several Jedi can the public be certain that the poor behavior of one Jedi was unusual. Thus, it takes many Jedi to undo the mistakes of one."

When considering all these passionate notes, it only seemed appropriate to us that the value system for our pronouns is community based to give the Jedi a chance to express how much they love their Order via grammar. Encoding information about social categories into pronouns is also nothing new and can be found in various languages across language families.

So, in that sense, that but of Dai Bendu is rather artificial instead of following a natlang development, but we thought it was neat

#dai bendu #jedi #ask #star wars #syntax #ozzystar2

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sprinklina · 5 months

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4, 9, 18, and 25 for the plural ask game ^_^

4. Are there any activities your system members like to do together? Collective hobbies? Talk about those!

yes !!!!! yes ! most of us enjoy drawing (i'd say lina likes it the most but that's because she's usually the one here, so it's skewed.) what's interesting is our artstyles are all (at least slightly) different. for example, lina's changes depending on what she draws, mine is more angular, etc. we also play the same games but the memory sharing is a bit weird so it causes some funny moments when certain people don't know how to play :)

9. How long have you been a system and/or known of your system?

i'd say about twelve years ? since we are sixteen. obviously since we were that young, lina didn't KNOW what a system was, but it's been going on for a while haha.

18. Are there differences between systemmates surrounding sensory things? (For example, one person likes the taste of one food and another doesn't.)

oh god yes. i hate drinking anything other than water unless someone makes me. wolf really enjoys eating meat (makes sense...) and some others just have aversions / favorites. lina goes crazy about dry cereal. other than food, i hate soft fabrics but lina loves them. it makes shopping very interesting

25. What is something you wish singlets knew about plurality?

i genuinely don't know! i think it depends. maybe something i'd say is that alters / introjects can't really choose who they are. i'm a fictive from something i'd rather not mention (but is rightfully hated on this site) and i often feel terrible about it. on a lighter note i think they knew that i am sooo funny and charming and the best 💖

#🐍#thank you for everyone asking these :) it's genuinely entertaining #<- plus i have nothing better to do with my time !

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dollystuffs-chiori · 21 days

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🍓🍌🍏🍇🥒?

🍓 - What's your headspace like, if you have one? Does your headspace have any lore to it?

It 's basically Penacony!! We 've got the Dreamscape Reverie, Dreamflux Reef, and a bunch of other fun Penacony mechanics such as the gravity modifiers!!

🍌 - What's a funny moment you witnessed or were a part of, whether in our out the headspace?

Once Chiori was looking in a full-length mirror in a bathroom and out of nowhere Aventurine yells "MY BALLS HURT" and Chiori goes "😰WE DON 'T HAVE THOSE"

🍏 - What's your favorite thing about being plural? If you don't have a favorite/don't enjoy being plural, use this as a free space to gush about whatever you'd like!

I personally really like being able to distribute tasks somewhat evenly :3 Furina is our resilient queen and takes on most migraines and breakdowns 🫡

🥒 - What's your favorite activity to do with your headmates whenever possible?

Ohhh Sparkle likes to tease Aventurine by reading Aventurine x reader smut while he's in co-con (and he complains the whole time). We really like scrolling through source tags, though, overall. It's especially funny/interesting to find headcanons that don't line up with introjects :3

🍇 - Does your system have varying tastes in music, food, etc? If so, what is everyone's favorites?

Ohhh very much so. The music tastes isn 't a problem because we can just make playlists on Spotify. FOOD HOWEVER. Our father complains a lot about how "I never know what you 'll want to eat" we don 't either SHFKDH

Most of the dissociative ones (such as Jingliu, Ganyu, Acheron, and Hanya) prefer berries and frozen sweets such as popsicles cus they have high sugar content and are low-effort snacks.

Furina and Columbina like baked goods and hot cocoa along with fruity/floral teas, served hot or cold. They 're particularly fond of croissants and cookies with chocolate in them. Or any pasties with raspberry, strawberry (and/or rhubarb), or cherry fillings. (Baked goods/pastries are a shared positive trigger for both of them! Oftentimes even the offer of one will spring one of them to front.)

I (Kitty/Kirara) like chicken and savoury foods and often am the best at restaurants >:3 I 'm not super picky but I need sauce with my meat or so help me /silly

Firefly likes salads a lot!! As well as fruits that aren't berries, like cherries, oranges/tangerines, and peaches!

Sparkle likes foods that are sweet with a bit of kick to them. Sweet and salty, sweet and spicy, sweet and sour...

Aventurine likes spicy and savoury!! One of our friends once called him gay Jesus but that 's off topic-

#system stuff #plurality #pluralgang #plural #plural stuff #headmates #ask game #system #system ask game #~🐈

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