#please ignore the guns i cant draw

[translucentjade]

#genshin impact #genshin impact fanart #zhongli #diluc #diluc ragnvindr #zhongli genshin impact #cowboys #please ignore the guns i cant draw

[kewltie]

thinking of bkdk in their late 40s when all their friends have already settled down with a family, izuku muses a lil forlornly how he would like to have someone to come home and katsuki just stares him dead in the eyes and says, "marry me then. i wont let you be lonely in that empty apartment."

the thing is bkdk are super successful heroes, they're the ranking no.1 and 2 and everyone knows their name but because izuku put so much effort into his career he never give himself the chance to meet someone and fall in love because the next things he know he's already 48 yrs old and still very single. as soon as he got right out of UA he had put himself right to work and hasn't truly stop since so izuku feels like he misses out on his youth, the flutter of first love, and now he feels like it's too late to grasp that chance again because he's too old to be stumbling around at love BUT here is katsuki suddenly telling izuku to marry him as though that would solve everything, solve izuku's worries and fears that he'll never experience love the way his friends had or knows what it feels to come home to a waiting arms that will comfort him after a hard day at work.

izuku first tries to laugh it off because katsuki cant be serious right?? but katsuki doesn't crack a single smile. "Do i look like im the type to joke about this kind shit to you?" he asks, voice steady and true. it is then that izuku realizes katsuki had meant every word he said.

but izuku still cant wrap his head around why would katsuki want to marry him of all things?? it is because they're both bachelor and wretchedly alone standing at the very top of their career where nobody can touch or hope to nobody can understand them like they do to each other?? izuku thinks that's a very dry reason to marry someone for the sake of convenience and not love at all because even though he'd devoted all his time to saving the world and helping ppl and HE'S OLD NOW but he still earnestly yearn to fall in love the ways all his friends had.

"If you needed company, we don't have to marry each other. I'm here for you always, you know that," izuku offers instead. "We're partners."

katsuki is silent briefly, then, he says, "You think i want to marry because you're convenience?"

Izuku blinks. "is that not it?"

"No," he says, all grave and serious, and for a moment izuku is breathless with realization.

"Oh," izuku replies, looking down at the table like it has all the answer in the world. "how long?"

"Since our third year at UA."

izuku jerks his head up, eyes wide with shock.

"what—I, wait, you can't mean that right?" he shakes his head as he flounders for the right words. they're both almost hitting their 50s now, so if it started in their third year then it would be 30 years of katsuki waiting for him, of pining over izuku and all that time was lost because of it.

katsuki press his lips into a thin line. "I have never lie to you."

"I—I'm not—" izuku flushes, because this wasn't anything he had plan for. who would anyway? no one would ever believe that katsuki has been in love with him for almost 30 years and izuku only found out about it now. even though katsuki has revealed the secret he has been hiding for 3 decades, izuku has no answer for him. he didn't notice katsuki's feelings for this long not because he chose to willfully ignore it but because he has never thought of katsuki in that light and that is the sad truth of it all. katsuki must have realizes that too because he doesn't press for more from izuku.

"i'm sorry," izuku says, mind racing to come up with a proper reply to katsuki's feelings because he deserves that much. "it's not you—"

Katsuki scowls. "shut the fuck up, don't even start that with me."

izuku quickly shuts his mouth, floundering for another reply that with save both of their feelings.

"Six months," katsuki says instead, eyes firm and never once dull since izuku has known him. "give me six months to convince you and if it doesn't work out we can get divorce then."

"you still want to marry me?!" izuku asks in disbelief. "shouldn't we like date first at least? isn't that how normal relationship work?!"

katsuki roll his eyes. "we co-own an agency, you have your toothbrush at my house, and we spent 18hrs out of 24 together almost everyday. our friends joke about us being a married to each other as much as to our work, we're each other's first emergency contact if something were to happen," he continues, straightforward like he's listing their grocery for today, "and i cant ever imagine wanting anyone more than i ever want you."

throughout this strange turn in their conversation, izuku realizes not once has he ever heard katsuki said he loves him but the way katsuki had revealed his unwavering devotion that lasts 3 decades and the dry, bluntness in which he spoken of wanting izuku, it's heavy. this hefty thing that katsuki has carried with him for nearly 3 decades, and in those years what izuku thought katsuki was just disinterest in any romantic connection because not once had izuku seen him look at another person, but it's because he has eyes only for izuku and nobody else.

izuku should have known never to expect anything less then 120% with katsuki because if there's anything that means something to katsuki, he would give it all and then some. it's humbling really, to be loved so fiercely and with such devotion that 3 decades is worth every second of it but izuku doesn't know if he's worth it especially when he's hesitant about his own murky feelings. he loves katsuki undoubtedly. they're partners in more way then one, but he doesn't know if he can love katsuki the way he deserves to be love in return, to return that same level of intensity.

"and what if the six months went by and there's nothing show for it?" izuku mumbles, hands clasp together under the table. i dont want to ruin this friendship of ours, he doesn't say. "what if you get bored with me and realized this isn't something you want now. what happen then?"

"you're stuck with me for life even if we get a divorce. i won't let you ever get rid of me either way," katsuki says, lips twitching with the slightest hint of amusement. "and if you're worry about me getting bored of you, don't. i fucking wont." It’s firm, assured, and completely sincere.

izuku thinks anybody with a half a brain at all would see this admirable man right in front of them with his unwavering affection and devotion that he had nurtured for 3 decades would be half way in love already, but izuku neither race or skip a beat; it remains dull and unmoved. maybe he's really too old to love like this. maybe, it's not that he's too busy to ever search for it like everyone else but because he has all the love for everyone but none ever hold a special place in his heart. for all of katsuki's sharp edges, his feelings burn ever so brightly while izuku has since been numb to his own emotions. to give too much to the world, to his job that he has never let himself fall freely and unconditionally. it's terrifying.

"what if i hurt you instead?" he says, quiet and severe. "what if in the end i couldn't return what you've given me?"

katsuki doesn't answer right away. the air around them tenses, threatening to suffocate them in the waiting silence. then a hand grab his and draws it toward katsuki's chest. "don't fucking underestimate me, idiot. i can and will make you fall in love with me in 6 months. 6 months is more than enough to make you realize what a fucking dumbass you have been the entire time for not taking notice of me while i have been looking at you for almost half of our life," he says with the cocky assurance that propelled him to the no. 2 position and beyond.

for the first time since this exchange had started and taken a strange, strange turn that left him his world shaken to its core, izuku's heart feels lighten. He stifles a giggle. "i still think we should date at least. marriage is maybe jumping the gun a little too soon."

"No." Katsuki's eyes narrow, and he squeezes izuku's hand firmly. "i'm not giving you any chance to escape from this. we can do all the dumb dating things you could ever want but we're getting marry first."

izuku tries to draw his hand back but katsuki remains undeterred. "Kacchan, please," he says. half begging for his hand back and half pleading against his insane idea. who in their right mind would ever marry first then date each other?! That's just not how it work! yet, katsuki is an unmovable fortress against increasing izuku's distress.

"deku," he says, thumb running across izuku's knuckles in a soothing circle, "give me this chance. let me prove it to you that i can do it. take this leap of faith with me and i won't disappoint you. trust me with your heart like you trust me with your life and i promise i will keep it safe."

izuku draws out a long, lingering breath that leaves his head heady with a dawning realization. "o-okay," he finally acquiesces, shaken with the knowledge that his heart suddenly doesn't feel safe at all for the first time in a long time in the hands of the man in front of him. bakugou katsuki is dangerous, but to the tender beat of his heart.

Katsuki's lips stretch upward into a small, precious smile that rarely see the light of day, leaving izuku breathless just for a moment. "we'll go get the marriage license tomorrow."

"tomorrow?!" izuku shrieks.

maybe he has been wrong all along, maybe you're never too old fall in love and experience it for the first time and that sometimes the things that matter the most to you are always worth the wait even if take 3 decades and katsuki always been more patient then people give him credits for.

#bakudeku #not!fic

[thefatedthoughtofyou]

Dirty Deeds (Done Dirt Cheap) - Part 9

Summary: Sam inherits Steve Roger's crime empire after a handful of his men betray and kill him. The rest of the crime world, sensing an opening, go after Sam and the territories he's inherited from Steve. Thankfully, Steve left him a number, someone to call if he ever needs help. Someone, Steve claimed, he can trust. But can Sam really trust a mercenary with that much blood on his name? And that many knives in his pockets.

WARNINGS: (there will eventually be all of these things) blood, violence, murder, shooting, stabbing, sex, blood play , food related things: malnutrition, feeding.

18+ Content: Make Good Choices Kids <3

Ao3

Sam walks into the bar room the next afternoon to find Bucky sitting on top of said bar, legs dangling over, feet tucked behind one of the bar stools. Torres is standing in front of him, a knife in his hand, concentration furrowing his brow. Sam stops, leans agaisnt the door frame, and watches them. He notes Maria and Helen sitting at a table behind them, talking quietly but keeping their eyes on the pair. He nods when they look over at him, both of them nodding back with soft smiles. Sam moves his eyes back to the men at the bar right as Torres attempts to flip the knife between his fingers.

The knife goes too far, Torres reaches for it, clearly on instinct. But Bucky is faster, he bats Torres's hand away with his metal one and catches the blade, giving Torres a look. The kid rubs at his neck, cheeks pink as he looks at the ground. Sam can see his hands are already littered with small cuts. Bucky holds the knife out, offering it to the kid to try again.

"I think I might be just better with guns Mr. Barnes." He shakes his head. Sam watches Bucky watch the kid for a moment before stowing the knife away. Sam notes that he didn't make him take it and try again. Didn't make him do something he didn't want to do.

"Bucky. You good with guns?" He asks, leaning his elbows on his thighs. Torres nods, and Sam can see the excitement in his eyes. Sam smiles to himself, the kid is good with guns. A damn good shot.

"You got one?" Bucky asks, his feet swinging near the bar stool before he tucks them behind it again.

"Yeah of course." Torres says, reaching into his jacket, and pulling out the gun he always has in his side holster. He holds it up, flat in his palm.

"May I?" Bucky asks, reaching for it, his finger tips brushing the hilt. Torres nods and he picks it up easily, turing it over in his hands, carresing it lovingly. Sam didn't know someone so violent could be so gentle. After last night it was a bit jarring, seeing Bucky like this.

"This is a damn beautiful gun kid." He moves his finger over the bottom of the hilt, over the name that Sam knows is there.

"Mariana. Mother?" Bucky asks, handing the gun back gently. Torres moves his finger over the name, just as Bucky had done, and then stows the gun away again.

"Grandmother." He says, a shy smile on his lips as he glances up at Bucky. Bucky gives him a look, a look Sam can't quite decipher yet, he cant figure this guy out. But he's worried. Worried he's going to make a comment about Joaquín's grandmother. Sam watches Bucky tilt his head, this way and that as he leans back, palms flat on the bar, holding himself up.

"You ever shot a sniper rifle before?" Is what he says next, snapping Sam out of his worry, he rolls his shoulders but stays by the door.

"No. I've always wanted too though." Torres says, sounding, and looking, like the excited kid he is. Sam bites his lip to hold back another smile.

"And you're a good shot?" Bucky asks.

"Yes." Torres says, no hesitation. Bucky hums.

"Maria? He a good shot?" Bucky calls over the kids shoulder.

"He's a damn good shot. It's pretty impressive actually. " She nods, giving the kid a wink when he smiles at her. Bucky nods at him when he looks back.

"Tell you what. After all this bullshit settles. I'll teach you how to use one." Bucky says, smiling as Torres's eyes go wide.

"Be a good skill for you to have. And if you're as good as they say, you'll be a natural." Bucky nods, narrows his eyes.

"You got good patience?" Bucky asks. Sam sees a glint in the kids eye.

"Of course I do. I've been working with you haven't I?" Torres says, his voice is softer than the tease requires but Bucky laughs all the same. Sam watches him rock backwards with it, his hands falling on his stomach before he rocks back the other way, smacks at Torres's cheek with his palm before pointing at him.

"He's got jokes." Bucky says, smiling brightly and shaking his head. Torres smiles back, his cheeks pink as cherries when his eyes fall to the ground.  Sam pushes off the door frame and walks forward then.

"Who says he's joking?" Sam asks, drawing their attention. Both of them still smiling as he approaches. Sam pats Torres's shoulder, and the boy moves to sit with Maria and Helen, joing the card game they'd started. Bucky nods at Sam as he steps up to the bar, standing a few feet away from him.

"Morning." Bucky greets.

"It's almost 2 in the afternoon." Sam says dryly. Bucky's brow furrows, he bends backward, looking at the clock behind the bar before straightening up again.

"Huh. Well. I just got up before I came here so it's morning for me." He says, grabbing some peanuts from the bowl behind the bar and popping them in his mouth.

"I figured." Sam says, and Bucky smiles again.

"So." Bucky says, going serious, leaning toward Sam a bit.

"You got a plan yet?" He asks, pulling his leg up onto the bar as he turns to face Sam. Sam nods, slowly, he's still working out a few kinks. Knows what he wants to do. Isn't sure Bucky can do it alone.

"How do you wanna deal with it?" Bucky asks, tossing a few peanuts into the air and catching them in his mouth. Sam keeps his eyes firmly away from the line of his throat.

"We have to take things from them." Sam says, the words drawn out, he's still hesitant.

"Take things. Like people?" Bucky asks, his tongue moving over his teeth. Sam nods.

"Important people." Sam says, lacing his fingers on the bar top.

"We talkin family important or like, second in comands important? Cuz I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not above killing family members, it's just that the most important ones are usually kids. And I uh- I'll be honest, I'm not really into killing kids." Bucky says, his hands fidgeting on his leg as his eyes burn into Sam. Sam looks at him, the way his blue eyes shine in the sun drifting through the skylights, his intense stare making Sam want to step away from him.

"No kids." Sam says, matter of fact. No kids. Not ever. Bucky looks at him, his eyes staring for a few more moments before nodding, once. Satisfied.

"So second in commands then?" Bucky asks.

"Yes. That should be sufficient." Sam says, eyes drifting as he thinks.

"All of them?" Bucky asks, leaning to the side a bit, looking for Sam's eyes.

"All of them. At once." He finally says, hoping his worry doesn't show as he moves his eyes back to Bucky.

"All of them at once." He says, not like he's agreeing, like he's thinking it over.

"Can you do that? By yourself?" Sam asks, Bucky says nothing, his eyes moving over the ceiling.

"I can send someone with you if you need help. Torres could-"

"No." Bucky cuts him off.

"Absolutely not." Bucky says, all but glaring at Sam.

"We trust him." Sam says. He doesn't want to send Torres. Bucky turns away from him, his body turned back toward the open bar room, his eyes on Torres's stiff back.

"Torres." Bucky's voice is low. The kid turns to look at him.

"Out." Bucky jerks his head toward the door. Sam's fists clench at his sides. Torres's eyes look to him, but before he can say anything Bucky speaks again.

"Torres. Out. Now." His voice is firm and Torres stands before he means too, Sam can see it in his eyes.

"Please." Bucky says, a sigh, Sam looks between them, his eyes falling on the kid, he looks desperate. Sam nods once and watches him leave. And then he rounds on Bucky.

"You don't give my people orders." His jaw is tight, his teeth clenched.

"He's just a fucking kid." Bucky says, ignoring what Sam had said.

"I know that. You think I wanna send him into a shitshow like that? I trust him. If you don't want him. Take Maria. Or Helen. They can help." Sam suggests, his arms crossed,  fingers digging hard into his own arms.

"I don't think you fully understand what's gonna happen. You don't want any of your people there." Bucky says, hopping off the bar, his boots hitting the floor with a thud.

"It's not just gonna be a shitshow. It's gonna be goddamn cluster fuck. And I'm gonna be in the middle of it. And I can't do my fucking job if I have to keep a look out for your people. It won't work." He's in Sam's space, his face set in a scowl.

"So you're gonna go in alone? Against all the families seconds?" Sam asks, scoffing as he looks at Bucky. Anger rises in his chest when Bucky smiles at him.

"I didn't say I was going alone." Bucky says, his voice low.

"No?" Sam asks, his brows rising.

"No. You implied I was going alone." He smirks again and Sam's hand tingles, he wants to slam his fist into that smug face.

"So you have someone in mind?" Sam asks, refusing to take a step back, to get away from Bucky.

"Yeah. As luck would have it, a friend of mine's in town." He says, his head tilting, that smug look not wavering once. Sam nods. Doesn't ask questions. He's not sure he wants to know.

"You trust them?" Is all he asks.

"Yes." Is Bucky's only answer. Sam nods. And Bucky, thankfully, steps away from him. Sam watches him lean back against the bar.

"How do you plan on getting them all together?" Bucky asks.

"Why don't you leave that to me." Sam says, his jaw still tight. Bucky's eyes move to him again and Sam swears he sees him laugh, just a small huff. But he sees it.

"Okay. You just let me know when and where. And I'll be there." Bucky says, leaning back, eyes closed, face tilted toward the ceiling.

"You and your plus one." Sam says, shaking his head.

"Yup." Bucky answers, popping the P at the end. Sam smiles, his teeth digging into his lip as he makes a fist at his side.

"Hey Bucky?" He says soflty, getting the man's attention. He moves his head to look at Sam and Sam slams his fist into his face. Bucky stumbles sideways with a grunt.

"You do not. Give my people orders." Sam says slowly, wiping at nothing on the front of his jacket. Bucky turns back to him, blood in the corner of his mouth. Sam watches him move the back of his hand over his lip, eyeing the blood before looking at Sam. He smiles, blood on his teeth.

"That was good. You only get one more." Bucky reminds him, pressing his fingertips to his lip, his tongue licking at the blood there. Sam hears a buzzing noise and watches Bucky reach into his pocket for his phone, he reads the screen and then wiggles the phone at Sam.

"Well speak of the devil." He says, looking down at his phone. Sam sighs, shaking his head. He turns away, stalking toward the door.

"Just be there." He says, his voice low.

"Yes your highness." Bucky calls after him. Sam squeezes his eyes shut, takes a deep breath, and flexes his hand at his side as he walks down the hall. The pain in his hand was worth it. Worth seeing the moment of shock in Bucky's eyes, and seeing the blood in his mouth. Sam flexed his hand a few more times. He was already hoping he'd never need to hit him again. Punching Bucky Barnes had felt like the fucking equivalent of punching a goddamn brick wall.

He passed Torres sitting on one of the benches in the entree way, the kid was on his feet by Sam's side immediately.

"What happened? Is everything okay?" Torres asked, keeping pace with him easily. Sam stopped outside his office door.

"Everything's fine." He assured him.

"Torres." He said, getting the kids attention. He looked at Sam with wide eyes.

"Get me some ice would you?" He asked, sighing. Torres moves his eyes from Sam's face to his flexing, already bruised, hand, and then back up. Sam saw his lips curve into a smile as he nodded and took a step back.

"Right away sir." He said, nodding at Sam before turning on his heel and rushing off in the direction of the kitchen. Sam watched him go before stepping into his empty office, he leaned back againt the door and sighed, his hand aching at his side. This asshole was gonna be the fucking death of him.

#sambucky #winter falcon #sambucky fic #winter falcon fic #sambucky mob au #dark!sambucky #dirty deeds #dirty deeds part 9 #my writing

[redbirdbella]

@clintasha-week  Advent calendar Day 9 - Emotions 

Very angsty. CW - guns, illusions to suicide, Avengers Assemble canon character death, drug use, talk of mind control. (If there's any more please tell me but those are the ones i can see.)

It takes Natasha 45 minutes to decide Clint's been alone long enough.

It takes two weeks for her to find him.

Phil's funeral had been tough on everyone, her archer especially. He'd been a broken man, tears staining his cheeks as he carried the casket. Natasha to his left, holding his hand as she helps bear the weight.

Barton, Romanoff, Rogers, Hill, Fury and May carrying the weight of a brother, a comrade and a true patriot July 1964 til May 2012 (or at least that's what the grave will say).

She gives him space, room to grieve, to bury his head into his hands and weep until shes worried he'll shrivel up. Like he'll faint from dehydration like when he was hungover that one time in Vegas. Happier times. Hill supplies the tissues and Steve the rousing speech. It's tasteful, Phil would appreciate it. But there's no flowers to hide the casket, just his stupid Captain America trading cards on, the ones that make Natasha's heartbreak.

Clint asks for space. After it's all over, once the coffins gone behind the red velvet curtains and the music plays. She agrees, resigned to him running. She can play the game. Follow where he leads.

Two weeks. Two damn weeks it takes. Europe, the Americas, Africa. She even checks in with Barney. The infamous Hawkeye is gone with the wind.

She goes on a whim. On a shadow of a memory of Tokyo. Of him stitching her up. Of safety and warm alcohol. A disconnected safehouse. Off the grid. Shelter, nothing more.

It's not there, replaced by a luxury high-rise. Last few units remaining the realtor declares. Great, he'll be near the top then.

She hacks the database. It's easy enough. Flat 804.

It's quiet. Eerily so, and she prays to whatever deity will listen to not have another funeral so soon.

She knocks hard, demanding a reply, but she's no surprised when no one answers.

Simple locks make simple work, the door creaking open in spite of her pleas for quiet.

He's up and in the doorway. He's armed, fingers gripping to his old Glock. Simple, effective but not if he looks so indecisive. Like its somehow difficult choosing between the intruder and himself.

"Clint" She whispers, pressing a kiss to the side of his mouth letting his stubble scratch against her, "It's ok. Just me."

"Tasha" he breathes, taking her head into his hands. She holds them, noticing the way they shake, the way it makes it easy to dispossess him. Too easy. She notices the razor burn on his cheeks like he'd tried, tried to find himself amongst the rubble, "He's- I'm- I've fought so hard Tasha"

"I know, you've been so brave, but you don't have to be. I'm here, together yeah?"

He nods, letting her push her way into the apartment. The way she moves past the bottle piles and cracked walls with an effortless grace ignoring the smell of BO and alcohol. The lingering stench of rock bottom.

"Let's get you clean huh?"

He nods leading her to the bathroom. The flat has a bath graciously untouched and running hot water that leaves Natasha whispering a silent thank you to the powers that be.

She's well packed, well versed in Clint and all his emergencies. Magnesium enriched Epsom salts with lavender and chamomile, to soothe his sores and the anxious energy in his muscles. Clint recognises the box and nods reluctantly.

"Want to put some in?"

He doesn't, but he doesn't stop her adding a healthy amount. He strips down without her request, he isn't scared of being naked. Not with her. She's seen worse. She's seen the bodies on the floor, even helped organise the men that had taken Phil away, leaving the red smudge that seemed to imprint into his mind.

"Hey" She whispers kindly as if the past didn't hang so heavy between them "the water should be warm enough now. Go on, it won't bite"

He nods and steps in, if only to see her smile his last connection to humanity reflected back to him.

"Should we lay down?" She asks but she's already slowly lowering herself letting her arm dangle into the water.

He follows her. A little less steady but it's a start. She kisses his head, "Whatever you're on its strong"

Clint shrugs. Not strong enough.

"How long?"

"How long?" Natasha echos "long enough that I've missed you"

"No, how long in here?"

"Until I say so"

There's no quip just a nod and Natasha's heart breaks just a little more. She clings to the outside of the bath under his watchful gaze, humming songs she remembers from better times. Before gods and monsters and mayhem.

It takes a while for the salts to work their magic, making his limbs grow heavier, back to his control. The bath should be cool, if Natasha hadn't constantly refilled bringing it back to a good temperature. The one that melts the trickster god's ice.

"There, I've got something to get you dry" She whispers when he stands, requesting to be let out. She'd got it at the airport, so it's still fluffy with its new novel smell. He wraps it around his waist and she throws his clothes into the water left in the tub. Cleaning the air of the smell and giving him no choice but to choose the fresh clothes she's brought. He agrees to the pants, black with a purple stripe out the outside leg, the pair he always wore for long nights in.

"That's better" Natasha praises, directing him to the toilet, seat down, "you tried to shave-"

"I look like him" oh the original him. Barton Snr. The only man she hated more than Loki.

"I only see my partner" she whispers pressing another kiss to his cheek, "let me show you-"

She brings out a kit. A long-forgotten kit, one that only comes out for him. Her Barbers kit from her time attending to the soldiers. It's not the same, her tools had been blunted through use but the idea is still there. Buried deep through countless repetition.

Clints not like the soldiers. Even now he fidgets putting himself at her mercy. It's a long process, a Turkish shave, but each time it's worth it for the way he smiles, blushing under her tender touches. It's different this time, there's no more smiles but he shuts his eyes letting himself be pampered.

"There." She whispers placing a mirror into his hands once the act is done "There you are. Back again"

He nods, avoiding the man that glances back at him and she places her hands against the back of his neck.

"You cant ever ask for space again"

He nods.

"Not until I say so"

He nods. He's taken something, something strong. Detoxing will be a bitch but that was tomorrows battle.

"Bed?"

He doesn't nod, but he doesn't object either just leads her there as if she just wanted to see it. To check for proof of its existence.

There's no more fresh sheets, but the spare bedrooms untouched. Natasha's doubt's he'd left the living room much, not in this state.

He lays on the bed and waits for her to follow. Then he surrounds her, hands desperate to touch, to reassure his trembling grip on reality.

"I'm here. I'm here" she soothes

"You've been here before" he counters.

"Not like tonight"

He's quiet until he can't contain anymore "They took my mind"

"And I took it back"

"I killed him.

"Loki killed him. You were with me"

He nods, "You would have saved him."

"I made my choice"

"It wasn't your choice to make!"

They settle into the silence that follows. She doesn't expect an apology, she doesn't need one. She knew what it was like for someone to take your brain and play.

"Did you really think I wouldn't know you? That I wouldn't come looking" She whispers "I fought a god for you."

"And do you like your prize?"

"Now you sound like him"

"Cause he's still in there! I'd blow a hole in my head to let him out! to make it stop!"

"Don't- I need you" She's not beyond pleading, not for Clint.

He's quiet, until the tears come. They burn his freshly shaved skin so she stems them, blotting them out with her fingers.

"I'm here, it's ok" she's writing cheques she can't cash, making promises she can't keep "It can stop now, let me take it from here"

She offers out her arms as he'd done all those years before. His arms were bigger. It wasn't such a tight fit but her skills lay elsewhere. She lets her hands creep down his bareback. Recalling every last detail she can remember about her massage class back in Russia, when they'd promised her only gentle hands could wiggle out secrets. Before they corrected the lie.

He startles as she begins, if the sobs that shudder against her shoulder are any indication.

She shhs him, cradling him like a child

"It's just me"

She draws circles against his back, letting him strain away when she touches somewhere tender.

"Please, please don't fight me like you do him"

She lets her own tears slip away as he surrenders to her touch, feeling each muscle relax against her.

Until he surrenders to the deep sleep that pulls him under.

There's no more need to fight, for she grants him rest.

#clintasha advent 2020 #clintasha angst #clintasha #idk guys #is it good or am i just having a breakdown

[molusca]

she apologized for how she handled the situation and apologized for brushing off someone's honest criticisms as hate. what more is she meant to do? throw herself onto a pyre? is she not allowed to feel lousy that this whole thing blew up in her face? because she's an adult and she made a mistake, she's not allowed to be sad or stressed? she's still an imperfect human. apologizing immediately usually means people are still sensitive to their own hurt of being called out because it's fresh and on their mind so it tends to slip into their apology, but if she had waited any longer to compose herself, you guys would probably have an issue with how long she took. also, in aaaaaallll of this, I've have yet to once see what exactly about her work is so problematic? I've read her fic and I personally can't see anything wrong, although I will admit that yes, I'm a white ciswoman but I'd like to think I'm aware of negative tropes. but the only thing touted is "it made an mlm uncomfortable" but HOW??? honestly, I want to know! if anything so I can avoid doing the same thing! how is anyone meant to learn when you're not bringing up these points as often as you're explicitly laying out the problems in her apology and whatnot. I've seen 6 posts about how shit the apology was and for why and I've not once seen the original comment detailing why the fic was problematic, and I've been looking on twit, tumblr, insta, and ao3. if it's been deleted, why isn't anyone stating again and again what's wrong? also, if someone is making fic/art you don't like, don't. interact. with. it. there's tons of stuff on ao3 and twit that I don't like, some of it that I think is disgusting (do you know how many fics there are with keith/kosmos?) and I just scroll past it cause it can't hurt me if I don't read it. there's one artist that's pretty popular on Twitter and I personally really hate they way they draw klance but it's all over my tl. I respect that person's art style and creativeness and keep on moving. other people enjoy it, good for them. and if I start reading something and get surprised with something I dont like, I leave! find people who write things you like and stop engaging with creators who's things you don't like, as far as I know no one is holding a gun to your head making you read problematic fic. also for as much as you rag on her for the words she used to apologize, you don't seem to be considering your own words when offering criticism. if Taylor mistook the person's words as hate, couldn't it have been because the way he worded the complaint was done hatefully? lastly, no one, absolutely no one, is required to talk about world issues when they're running a fandom account,no matter how "big" they are. we all know what's going on in the world, we're surrounded by sad and stressful stories practically 24/7 and if someone isn't, they're probably curating their social feeds to be that way (like you should do when it come to kl content creators you don't like). people sending hate in Taylor's defense are in the wrong I agree, and this isn't hate its critism its a discussion, but Taylor isn't responsible for, how many people did you say? 16k on twit? even if she said hey guys stop, you think they would? she's can't control all those people and expecting her to is nonsense. I see so many younger fans expecting perfection in their fandoms and that just isn't going to happen. yes we should be striving to be better but no one is ever going to be perfect. not you, not me, not the mlm person, not Taylor, not anyone on any side of this argument. the only way to avoid this kind of circular dog piling and hate sending is to better curate your fandom experience by ignore those you have issues with.- 🦛

she apologized for how she handled the situation and apologized for brushing off someone's honest criticisms as hate. what more is she meant to do?

im pretty sure i said its good that she realizes she handled it poorly. but she makes the whole apology about this, doesnt directly talk about the issues and i know someone went to her to talk about it. also, it took her a day to say something about it so it wasnt exactly immediate (in the sense people had already stopped talking about it but that doesnt mean they werent still bothered). the apology was directed at mlm, and i havent seen one saying it felt genuine. of couse she can be hurt but when you apologize to a marginalized group the focus shouldnt be your feelings, but the feelings of the ones you have hurt.

I've have yet to once see what exactly about her work is so problematic?

she admits to be projecting on lance. so she makes him very femine and keith very masculine. and ok, gay couples like that do exist, but she is a woman projecting in this situation so this bothers people. putting mlm in this position is a harmful steriotype, bc it feels very heterosexual. this is a trope, it unfortunately happens a lot and its harmful. women need to be aware of what they are representing when drawing/writing mlm because well, real mlm are going to see it, and no one likes to feel like a fetish to others. and its not our place to question if the criticism is right or wrong when we are not mlm, so if you read this and think “but thats not a problem thats not a fetish etc” well, its not your place to judge that. theres more to it and you probably could get a better answer from a mlm sorry.

if someone is making fic/art you don't like, don't. interact. with. it. there's tons of stuff on ao3 and twit that I don't like, some of it that I think is disgusting (do you know how many fics there are with keith/kosmos?) and I just scroll past it cause it can't hurt me if I don't read it.

please, lets not compare a minority pointing out harmful tropes with. something fucking illegal.

as you said, you are a cis woman, of course its not going to hurt you in this case. but if people are making harmful content its not a simple matter of “dont interact with it” because they will still be promoting it, other people are going to read it, and media influences how we see minorities so of course people will not like when they see bad portrayal of them. also, tumblr sucks so even if you want to just “dont interact with it” its hard because even after blocking you can still cross the content of someone. not sure how it works on twitter but anyway this discussion started on tumblr and tumblr doesnt stop people who were bothered by her to avoid her by blocking.

if Taylor mistook the person's words as hate, couldn't it have been because the way he worded the complaint was done hatefully?

i think she deleted the ask by now, but i dont remember the ask being hateful. i remember someone asking if she was a fujoshi, and another person mentioned that mlm didnt like the way she portrayals klance. i dont remember it being hateful. but again, she apologized for handling it badly. its just that she stops there.

no one, absolutely no one, is required to talk about world issues when they're running a fandom account,no matter how "big" they are. we all know what's going on in the world, we're surrounded by sad and stressful stories practically 24/7 and if someone isn't, they're probably curating their social feeds to be that way

ignoring world issues is a privilege. if someone is able to turn off from all the problems in the world, its a privilige. yes no one should talk aobut it all the time thats not even healthy, but to never talk about it is a privilege. thats what black people are saying, they cant just turn off from racism, so yes they are going to expect white people to do something. online honestly i cant do shit, i dont think anything i reblog here does a difference and i do what i can in my own country, but she has a plataform that could help bring awareness. again, its a privilege to be able to curate your social media to be a perfect happy place.

even if she said hey guys stop, you think they would? she's can't control all those people and expecting her to is nonsense.

maybe they wouldnt, but if people were doing this type of thing in my name, in my defense, i would at least say something about it idk. she cant control them but she makes nothing to show that she disagrees or look for the people being harassed to say something about it.

the only way to avoid this kind of circular dog piling and hate sending is to better curate your fandom experience by ignore those you have issues with.

when it comes to simple things like “i prefer taller lance and i dont like taller keith” yeah, its fine to ignore people who draw taller keith and move on with your life or something like that. but we are talking about mlm, a real group of people, being upset for being portrayed in a harmful and steriotype way. its everywhere in fandom, and in real life. they cant escape from real life, and then they come to fandom where everyone wants some escapism and have to deal with more issues. its tiring

#well. good morning #anon

[mrs-mikko-rantanen]

Conditioned

 2501 words. A little longer than I had planned but that’s ok I guess. I’d also wanted it to be a bit more “mind control” but it didn’t quite end up right. TW: Capture, choking, drugged, attacks, friendly fire, hospital.

 Adair followed Nyar as the captain pushed the door open, Thane keeping his gun trained on the door as the other two crossed the room to the figure lying on the floor. 

"Caelum, hey buddy it's me." Nyar had knelt to the ground, checking his pilot's pulse with one hand, the other still gripping his gun. Caelum let out a startled cry, wincing and recoiling from Nyar's hand. Adair felt his heart break a little for Caelum as he slug his own gun over his shoulder. The room was evidence enough that Caelum had been tortured and abused horribly during the month he'd been missing. The room was cold, with no padding anywhere in sight, meaning Caelum had likely spent most; if not all of his time here sleeping on the floor. Adair's nose wrinkled a little at the thought. It was also obvious that Caelum had been sick at some point in here, and the medic hoped that he didn't have any open wounds, any of which would absolutely be infected by now. 

          "Nyar, get the blindfold off him." Adair ordered gently, reaching over Caelum and cutting through the ropes that were holding his hands behind his back. 

         Once the blindfold had been removed and his bonds cut, Caelum's hands flew up in front of his face, his body curling up to protect his head. 

          "Caelum, it's ok, it's us. We're here to get you home." Adair said softly, trying to pull Caelum's hands away. "I just need to look you over real quick and then we can go, ok?"

         "No, stop!" Caelum wailed, slapping Adair's hands away, "Leave me alone!"

       Nyar grabbed Caelum's hands tightly, holding them out of Adair's way, "Hey man...hey hey, it's ok, we won't hurt-" he was cut off as Caelum broke free, scrambling into a sitting position and throwing a punch into Nyar's nose before he tried to back away. 

Nyar fell back a little, and Adair quickly grabbed Caelum’s arm. Caelum pried it out of his grip quickly, moving to back-hand Adair as he did so. Years of boxing in an underground ring and honing his reflexes were the only thing that kept Adair from getting hit. He leaned back quickly, Caelum’s fingers only just brushing against his nose. He took Caelum’s wrist again, loosely, as he called for Thane. 

“He’s in shock,” Adair explained quickly, “I just need him to calm down a little.” 

Thane nodded and knelt on the other side of the frightened young man, offering him a smile as well. “Cael, hey just look at me, ok? Just look…” 

Again, Caelum lunged to attack his friends and rescuers, letting out a pained scream as he clawed at Thane. Nyar had recovered by now, and wrapped an arm around Caelum’s chest, pulling him back away from Thane.

“GET OFF OF ME! LET GO! STOP IT, LET ME GO!” Caelum’s voice cracked as he struggled against Nyar’s grip. 

Thane frowned, looking to the door. “He’s making too much noise. They’re going to come investigate.”

“Snow him.” Nyar grunted, fighting to keep Cealum down, “Knock him out, MacClyde.”

Adair shook his head. “I don't think--”

“STOP! PLEASE, STOP! GET OFF ME!” Caelum was crying now, gasping and clawing as he kicked against Nyar. 

“I said knock him out!” Nyar shouted as Caelum threw an elbow into his side.

“I can’t! I don’t know if they’ve drugged him, I don’t want to risk overdosing him!” Adair shouted back as he and Thane fought to keep Caelum from hurting Nyar too much. 

Nyar let out an angry growl, shifting a little. “Sorry, buddy.” He grunted before wrapping his arm around Caelum’s neck, pressing his bicep tight against his throat. 

Adair felt a wave of horror crash over him, mixing with worry and guilt as he watched Caelum’s eyes widen and fill with panic. The mechanic tried desperately to free himself from Nyar’s grip, his fingernails digging into his arm and drawing blood in thin lines as his face went red. Adair met Nyar’s eyes, which were filled with question, and felt his jaw clench. It wasn’t long before Caelum stopped fighting, his hands falling limply to the ground, and his eyes rolling back as his head slumped to the side a little.

“He’s out.” Adair said, his voice flat.

Nyar nodded, his grip relaxing as he grabbed for the blindfold that had been discarded onto the floor. He tied it around Caelum’s mouth in a clumsy gag, then met Adair’s eyes. “We’ve already wasted enough time, we have to move, now. And we cant really do that again when he wakes up. We can argue in the car.”

Adiar’s teeth ground together so hard that the edges of his vision blurred a little as he helped Nyar haul Caelum up to drag him towards the getaway car. 

“Yes, Captain.”

Sometimes, he really did see exactly why Ewan hated Nyar as much as he did.

*.*.*.*

Caelum was warm. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt warm. He frowned a little as he shifted, trying to determine where he was. Nothing felt right. His brain was trapped in a fog and he had no memories past…

...Past Nyar trying to kill him.  

His eyes flicked open at the memory, and he blinked rapidly, a hand up to try to diffuse the light as his eyes adjusted. 

"Hey, look who's finally up!" He flinched away from the voice on his left. Thane. Thane had been there too. He'd held him down, kept his hands still while Nyar had wrapped his arm around Caelum's neck. If he was here now….

Caelum acted on instinct, gripped by an animal terror as he leapt out of the hospital bed. He ignored the shouting and the painful sting as the IVs and needles pulled against him, chaining him to the bed. He grabbed the front of Thane's shirt and slammed him against the wall, hard; once, twice, before shifting his grip so that both of his hands were wrapped firmly around the younger man's throat. Tears streamed down his face and he squeezed harder. 

"You're a lie!" He hissed, blinking through the tears, "You're a lie, you're a lie, you're a lie!"

Thane's fingers curled around Caelum's wrist and his mouth opened as he gasped, trying to force breath into his lungs. His face was red; eyes wide and full of terror and confusion. 

"You weren't there to save me." Caelum spat, "You were there to kill me."

The door burst open and Caelum's head spun around quickly to see Avanda burst in the room. He dropped Thane, who fell with a shuddering gasp and a fit of coughing to the floor. 

"Caelum, it's ok." Avanda said slowly stepping farther into the room now, "I'm not here to hurt you."

He almost believed her. 

Almost. 

It would have been much easier to trust her if he couldn't see the rest of them behind her, staring hungrily at him. 

"Do you know who I am?"

Caelum nodded, one fist raised to her, the other hand stretched out to shield himself from Thane, should he decide to get up and attack him again. 

"Good. That's good. Now I need to check on Thane, alright? I'm just going to lead him out of the room."

She waited until he nodded, then slowly helped Thane to his feet and ushered him out to the hallway before turning back to Caelum. 

"You're bleeding.  Can I fix that IV for you?"

"No." His voice was hard and his answer fast. "Stay back."

"Caelum, you're hurt. You need help. Please, let me-"

"I said stay back!"

"Caelum-"

He was on her in a heartbeat. She was pinned right where he'd had Thane trapped against the wall only moments before. 

"I said: stay back."

Avanda seemed calm. Especially for someone who's windpipe was being crushed by somebody a foot taller than them.

She reached a hand up to his arm, blinking hard and trying to form words. Her hand was trying to move his, but more patiently than Thane had been. 

"I'm...s-sorry…" She finally gasped. 

Caelum blinked in confusion as he felt something prick at his neck, and he released her to lift a hand to the needle that some one else had stuck him with while he was distracted. 

“I’m sorry,” She said again, stepping forward to catch him as he stumbled forward, “I’m so sorry, Cael.” 

Caelum let out a choked sob as he sank to the floor, staring at Avanda in terror.

“You lied...you lied too...no….”

“I’m sorry.”

Her face was the last thing he could see as the sedative pulled him away into the darkness.

"You lied."

*.*.*.*

"He's progressing well." Adair reported, flipping through Caelum’s file.

"And he's alone?"

"Yes."

"Good." Nyar nodded. “Good, I think he should stay isolated while he recovers.”

“You’re kidding.” Avanda scoffed, her arms crossed.

Nyar shook his head. “Not at all. He’s dangerous. It’s not forever, Av. He just needs some time to heal, that’s all the longer we’ll keep him on his own, I promise.”

“Nyar, that’s-” Avanda closed her eyes and shook her head, “That’s the last thing he needs right now, ok?”

Nyar scowled, shifting to face her better. “Oh yeah? Remind me, what happened when he woke up and saw Thane? Or what about both times he saw you?”

Avanda shook her head. “Nyar, he was still in shock, he’s been gone for a month, and who knows what kind of torture he’s been going through, of course he’d be scared!”

“Scared? That’s not scared, Av. That’s dangerous.” Nyar pointed towards the closed door separating them from the room where Caelum was, chained to his hospital bed.

“I hate to admit it, but I think Nyar may have a point.” Adair said slowly. “I mean look at how he’s been reacting to staff here during his recovery. Aislin can work with him fine, and he doesn’t fight Johnson at all. But he attacked you twice, and me once. I was there during the rescue, and he clearly misinterpreted some of the stuff that happened that night, so he thinks of me as a threat. As for you and Thane, I think it’s safe to say that whatever he went through, it was probably some sort of...conditioning based torture.”

The room fell silent. Avanda didn’t miss any of the quick glances that were tossed her way, or how Adair had paused before voicing his hypothesis. She sighed a little and chewed her lip, a scowl written across her face as she’s thought.

“He’s scared.”

“I know, Av but-”

“No.” She snapped, “No, you don’t know. You’ve never been through what he’s been through. You’ve never been where he is right now, you have no idea what it’s like to be terrified of the people you love for no reason.” She glared at everyone in the room, challenging them a little as she spoke. “So none of you know how scared he is right now. Or how lonely he is, or how desperately he just wants to feel safe.” She turned on her heel, heading for Caelum’s room as she rolled up the sleeves of her flannel. 

She pushed the door open slowly, stepping in and closing it behind her.

“Hello, Caelum.” It broke her heart to see him like this. He was one of her oldest friends, her brother. He was supposed to be cheerful and upbeat, never without a smile and a laugh. Not this traumatised shell with hollow eyes and a tear-stained face. 

“You shouldn’t be here.” His voice was rough as sandpaper as he shifted, pulling his knees closer to his chest as the short chains clinking slightly.

“I thought you might be lonely.” Avanda said gently. 

“I want to be alone.” Caelum whispered, “I can’t trust myself.”

Avanda nodded. “I know. But I trust you.” She stepped closer to him, moving towards the chair next to his bed.

Caelum fliched, pulling the chains away. “Don’t-don’t get too close to me.”

Avanda sat down slowly, resting her elbows on her knees. “I’m not afraid of you, Caelum.”

He looked up at her with sad, tormented eyes. “You should be.” He finally whispered.

Avanda smiled a little, sadly. “I’m so sorry, Caelum. I wish we’d found you earlier.” When he said nothing, she spoke again. “Do you mind if I touch you? I don’t think you need these chains.”

“No, please don’t.” He recoiled a little, holding his wrists out of her reach, “Please, I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Ok. If they make you feel better, we can leave them on.” She waited for him to relax again. “Do you remember when I first got back from when He’d kidnapped me? How I couldn’t look you in the eyes or stand close enough for you to reach me?”

He nodded a little. “Yes.”

“Do you know why?”

“Because He’d--conditioned you to expect some sort of pain with me.” Avanda hated how guilty he sounded about it. Like he had been the one to hold the lighter to her skin or to blow the smoke in her eyes. How he blamed himself for details of her past that he didn’t even know everything about. She’d never told any of the crew exactly what had happened. Not the specifics anyway, just the basics.

“I wasn’t very easy to be around those first few weeks, was I? I think I may have even hit you when you tried to hug me.”

Caelum let out a huff of what may have been laughter. “No, you didn’t hit me. You just acted like a cat that didn’t want to get picked up.”

Avanda chuckled a little. “Maybe you’re right. But did you ever once think that I was dangerous? Or that I was going to hurt you? That I’d become another person completely?”

“No.”

“What did you think?”

He licked his lips a little. “That you were scared. And that-that I wanted to help you.”

“That’s exactly how I feel right now. Caelum, I know exactly how you feel. I know how scared you are; how terrified you are of all of us, of yourself, I know. But I also know that you’re not going to hurt us. You’re still the same old giant, friendly, sweet, hungry, goofball that I grew up with. And I know that you would never dream of hurting me, or any of the rest of us. You’re still my friend. And I’m not about to just give up on you.”

Caelum looked up at her again, searching her face for any sign of a lie. “Thank you.”

Avanda smiled at him. “You’re welcome. Do you want me to take those off now?”

Caelum glanced at his wrists. “Are you sure you feel ok with that?”

“Positive. I can always put them back on for you if you start to feel worked up.”

Caelum swallowed hard, then nodded a little. “Ok. Ok, yeah. Let’s give it a try.”

#caelum insp #whumpee!caelum #whump #tw captivity #tw drugged #tw choking #tw hospital #tw mind control #caretaker!avanda #avanda insp #tw ptsd #ptsd #tw paranoia #tw passing out #ask to tag

[novannna]

You Were the Hands That Held Me

Danissa soulmate au.  everyone has a soul mate, and any marking that appears on their skin, appears on yours.  narcissa’s pov.  Kinda angsty, but also fluffy.  

tw: self harm, and mentions of abuse kinda

wc: 2363

Narcissa stared at her arm in awe.  This was the first time her soulmate had ever drawn something on her skin.  She had felt the same cuts and bruises her soulmate had received, just like everyone else, but this was the first time her soulmate had deliberately marked her own skin.

Messy butterflies with uneven wings, and twisted antennas marched down Narcissa’s forearm.  

“Oh,” she whispered.  “Cool.”  She grabbed the nearest marked, and held it poised above the other arm, ready to reply, but thought better of it.  

She shouldn’t force her soulmate to stop their art for Narcissa.  She dropped the marker, and kept watching the thick lines as they covered her entire arm.  

That night she washed it all away in scalding hot water before her grandfather noticed.  He wouldn’t approve of Narcissa communicating with her soulmate.  

He hated the idea of How there was one person in the world, waiting just for you.  

His soulmate had died years ago, leaving him heartbroken and angry, bitter to the world.   

If Narcissa wasn’t careful, he might take the anger out on her.    

Narcissa could take it, but she didn’t want to hurt her soulmate too.  Narcissa would feel awful.  

So she tried to ignore the small flowers and butterflies her soulmate drew constantly.  Narcissa tried her very best.  

---

Years later, Narcissa wrote to her soulmate for the first time.  It was in the middle of the night, when Narcissa had felt a searing pain across her arm that looked like a red slit across her pale skin.  

Her soulmate was in trouble.  She couldn’t just stand by now. Narcissa had to do something.  

Grabbing a tissue to staunch the bleeding, Narcissa scrawled across her hand in thick ink. 

STOP

I can’t , her soulmate replied. 

Please, just hear me out, Narcissa wrote, hoping she could do enough.  Hoping she could convince the person who had drawn butterflies everywhere on their body, that maybe the world really did want them. 

please, just stay out of this

I can’t. This is my body too.  And even though I’ve never met you, you're my soulmate and I care about you. 

Fine. I’ll listen. Her soulmate's handwriting was a little shaky, but very neat, with tall, loopy letters.  

I’m guessing you’ve been having a hard time with life recently, Narcissa started. 

I guess

Do you want to be here?  Narcissa asked bluntly

There was a long pause.  I don’t know, her soulmate finally responded.  I love Earth, but the people…. I can’t stand the people. All they do is bring hate and hurt to me

I get that.  But the people don’t matter. You do.  Danna wrote desperately. 

No I don’t. I’ve never done a single good thing in my life

You have!  You’ve made me smile!  You’ve made me laugh!  

Her soulmate replied, When?  This is the first time I’ve ever talked to you

When we were younger, you used to constantly doodle little flowers and butterflies all across our bodies. I loved to watch you draw them, watch the blocky little lines appear across my body.   Danna smiled as she recalled the delicate insects she wore across her body daily. 

I thought you hated those. That’s why I stopped

No, of course not!

Then why did you erase them?

Narcissa sighed. She thought for a second, then wrote, my grandfather. He hates soulmates. If he knew I was communicating with mine, I’m afraid he would hurt me.  And doing that would hurt you. 

But… that means you could get in trouble right now!

No. I won’t, I’m fine. You are more important.  Tell me, what made you want to hurt yourself today?

I guess I’m just tired of being ignored. I’m tired of being treated like a child. I want to leave my house, but I can’t. I can’t live on my own. 

Thats okay, you shouldn’t be ignored.  You should be your own person, and if your parents cant see that, they’re idiots!!

Narcissa capped the pen, and tried to wrap her blanket around her arm, the blood slowly soaked through the fabric, staining the blanket a bright red.  How would she explain that to her grandfather?  It didn’t matter right now though.  Right now, she had to make sure her soulmate was okay.  That was her one and only goal.  Nothing else mattered.  Narcissa had the opportunity to maybe save a life right now.  That’s what she had to do.  

They aren’t.  I’m the one who’s screwing up, her soulmate replied.  I cant ever get anything right.  Im just a big mistake that shouldn't even exist.  The worlds probably better without me

THATS NOT FUCKING TRUE!  Narcissa scrawled as quickly as she could.  I dont believe it.  Not for a second.  Just by being here, you’ve made the world a better place.  Everyday, I wake up and check my body for some indicator that you’re here.  I can’t help but think about the fact that there is someone out there meant for me.  And I’m meant for someone.  

I guess…

Narcissa sighed heavily.  She had to go to bed before her grandfather woke and saw her light on.  

Are you okay?  She wrote.  Are you in any danger?  If you are, im here.  For both of us

A minute passed before the reply came.  I dont think so.  I think im better.  But… if i feel bad again, can i talk to u?  This actually really helped me.  Thank you

Narcissa smiled.  Of course!!!  Just, could u write somewhere less obvious?

Sure.  I understand.

Narcissa smiled gratefully.  How ‘bout our ankles?  That’s less obvious and easy for me to hide

She felt pressure on her right foot, and slid it out from beneath her blanket.  A smile, and little butterfly doodle greeted her eyes.  

Good night, soulmate, Narcissa wrote

Good night.  Sleep tight.  And… thank you.

Narcissa smiled.  She slid out of bed, and held her arm close to her chest while creeping to the bathroom.  Once inside, she scrubbed all of the ink off her skin, and bandaged the red slit shut.  

Narcissa and her soulmate were okay.  That was all that mattered.  Everything was alright.  At least for now.  But now was the only thing Narcissa could bear to think about.  

---

After that one night, Narcissa’s soulmate never hurt themselves like that again.  But that didn’t mean they weren’t hurting.   Narcissa could tell they were hurting themselves in other ways.  

She tried to help.  She wrote reminders every few hours, telling her soulmate to eat, and drink water.  She wrote encouraging messages, and doodled across their skin.  

But still, Narcissa would feel her stomach growl with hunger, and her tongue beg for more water.  She felt her eyes grow heavy even though she had slept almost 10 hours the night before.  Her soulmate just didn’t care, and there was nothing Narcissa could do. 

They would talk to each other constantly, ranting about their day, or commenting about something they saw.  Narcissa grew much closer to the person she had never even seen the face of. Closer to them then anyone else she had ever known.  

Even her grandfather. 

Narcissa had a very strained relationship with her grandfather.  She knew deep down he loved her, but he had a hard time showing it.  He was caught in a life of crime, and there was no way out.  

He had been an arms dealer for years, selling guns and other weapons on the black market.  He made a lot of money, but not a lot of friends.  He was a bitter old man, who took all of his anger out on Narcissa.  He had never hit her, but his words were hard enough. 

Narcissa knew she was being abused, and belittled, and manipulated, but she always ended up excusing his actions. Or even worse, sometimes she would place the blame on herself.  She knew she was in a bad situation, but it was one she was stuck in. 

Narcissa talked about him lots with her soulmate.  It turned out, they had a similar situation with their parents.  

Mistreated, abused, bullied, shamed. 

The two escaped into their skin, engrossed with each other.  They held each other right through the pain and the tears.  Though at times, both of them desperately wanted to, they held strong and never hurried themselves for fear of hurting the other. 

---

One day, the straw finally snapped for Narcissa. She was 17 now, and old enough to live her own life. Old enough to understand what her grandfather gave her wasn’t love, it was trauma.  

After he yelled at her for an hour straight because she put a book in the wrong bookshelf, Narcissa decided she had taken enough. 

Can we go?  She desperately scrawled across her ankle. Can we escape these sorry excuses for lives?

Her soulmate wrote back a few minutes later. What do you mean?

We’re old enough to live on our own. Why are we forcing ourselves to live with these people who treat us so terribly. Why don’t we just run away together?

Ok. The reply shocked Narcissa. She had been expecting them to try and convince her otherwise, make her see the absurdity. Not agree.  But Narcissa was glad they agreed. They both deserved a chance to start over. To make a life for themselves, and do it right. 

You will?

With you?  Of course I will silly. I’ve been waiting years for me to ask

When?   When can we leave?

Whenever your ready

A week, Narcissa declared, I’ll meet you in a week at Gatlon City, at the train station

Ok.   I’ll be there, I promise, her soulmate wrote. 

Me too. Narcissa grinned. She was finally escaping. Finally starting fresh. Finally leaving her grandfather to be with someone who truly cared.  Narcissa couldn’t wait.

---

Narcissa creaked the door open, cringing as the hinges squealed loudly. 

“Just where do you think you’re going?”  Her grandfather slurred from the couch. 

Shitshitshitshit, Narcissa though. She was caught.  She was never going to escape her life.

“I told you earlier this week I’m going to a friends house tonight,” Narcissa said lightly, trying to mask her terror. 

“Stop lying!”  He screamed.  “I know that’s not true, you don’t have any friends.”

Narcissa cringed.  

She breathed in deeply.  She was already leaving forever, there was no point in lying anymore.  

“Fine  I’m leaving.  For good.”  She braced herself for the rage. 

Instead, he laughed.  “You?  You're leaving?”  He scoffed.  “You would never.  You’re too scared and dependent on me.”

Narcissa drew herself up.  “No.  You’re wrong.  I’m leaving, to find my soulmate.  We’re making our own life.  Together.”

He gaped at her.  “You can’t!  You can’t go to your soulmate,” he spat.  “You’ll live a terrible life.  You’ll be tied down forever.”

Narcissa shook her head.  “No.  I won’t.  I’ll live the best life I can.  Because I’ll be happy.  I won’t live in fear anymore.  I’m sorry you weren’t meant for your soulmate, but it’s different for me.  I know them.  We are meant for each other.  I wouldn’t expect you to understand.  All you know is hate.”

“So you’re really going?”  Her grandfather’s lip curled up.  

Narrcissa nodded.  “I am.  I’m making my own life, as far away from here as possible.”

“Then go!”  He snarled.  “I don’t want you in my house if you won’t see a reason.  Go.”  He picked a book sitting next to him, and hurled it at Narcissa’s head.  

She ducked, her hair ruffling by the wind.  

She turned to him, tears in her eyes.  “Goodbye grandfather.  I’m sorry.”  She threw open the door, and fled into the night.

---

Narcissa’s heart thudded in her ears.  This was it.  This was the day she was going to meet her soulmate.  She knew she should be realistic, but Narcissa couldn’t help imagining the meeting like something out of the sappy romance novels she liked to read.  

She expected the dreary clouds to disappear, and the sun to shine out on top of them.  

She expected to know exactly who was her other half

She expected to run up, into their arms, and kiss them like she had wanted to be kissed her entire life.  

But Narcissa knew how unlikely it was.  But, a girl could hope, couldn’t she?  

She inhaled deeply.  Uncapping the pen with her teeth, she scrawled on her palm, I’m here  

Me too, her soulmate wrote back.  The familiar loopy red marks eased Narcissa.  She knew this person.  This was her soulmate.  Everything was going to be okay.  It would all be okay.  

Her eyes locked onto a girl standing near a bench, her head bent over her hand, a pen tucked behind her ear.  

Somehow, Narcissa knew.  She knew this was the person she had been searching for her whole life.  She knew that the girl was her soulmate.  

Summoning every miniscule scrap of courage Narcissa could find, she approached the girl.  

She tapped her shoulder.  “Hi,” Narcissa breathed, heart pounding.  “I’m Narcissa.  I think I’m your-”

She was interrupted by the girl throwing her arms around her tightly.  

“I’ve waited so long to meet you,” Narcissa’s soulmate said roughly, her voice thick with tears.  “I’m Danna.”  

Narcissa laughed.  She realized she was crying.  “Me too.”

“I feel like I already know everything about you,” Danna laughed.  She swiped her eyes.  

Narcissa nodded.  “I know we’re soulmates, but I want you to know I understand if you don’t want me,” she said.  “I get it- not all soulmates are really soulmates.”

She was cut off by Danna pressing her lips to hers.  “I want you,” Danna breathed.  “You're the one who I’ve trusted with every secret I’ve ever held.  You’re the one who helped me when no one else could.  You’re the one who took care of me.”  Danna held their hands up, exposing the thick identical scars that spread across their wrists.  “You are the only other person in the world who understood, and actually helped me.  You were the hands that held me.”  Danna reached her hand to Narcissa’s face, wiping away her tears.  “I want you, and no one else.”

“Me too,” Narcissa whispered.  “Me too.”

Tag list: @novissa @thepurpledragon4444  @phobidawg @janisarkisian  @rvbell @lavenderbloo @redassassin  (let me know if you want to be added/taken off!!!)

#danissa #danna bell #narcissa cronin #wlwrenegades #renegades au #Renegades #supernova #archenemies #tw self harm #self harm tw #self harm #tw abuse #tw mentions of abuse #abuse tw #reblogs>>>likes

[xmalereader]

The Mandalorian X Eatherian Reader

-

|| Masterlist ||

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Summary: Reader is from earth and stumbles upon the mandalorian, suddenly joining his adventures.

Warnings: Fluff, language

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How they meet ;

-

It was finally Friday, Y/n was exhausted from classes and just wanted to get home and throw himself into bed, ignoring all of his calls and texts from hsi friends and just block out the world. It’s been a while since he’s last spoken to his parents, actually its been almost three years since he’s last spoken to them, he got lucky enough to still be in college before his parents cut him off, forcing him to work two jobs and late night shifts to earn the money he needed for his classes.

He doesn’t like it when others help him, it makes him feel weak at times but their are other times when he really wishes he could get some help. Just a little nudge is all he wanted.

Yet, here he is wandering around the woods in a black hoodie and dark jeans, he was wearing his favorite converse as he steps over some puddles and jumps over a few logs. After lessons he would take his usual walks in the woods, he enjoyed the smell of the trees and the after smell of rain. It relaxed him and brought him some good memories of his past, even though he was still trying to forget the bad ones. Y/n has his headphones on with music playing in the background, he tears off a branch from a tree and swings it around, finding a clean patch of mud he bends down to start drawing out random things that came into mind.

He was so focused on his drawing that he didn’t even notice a small like green creature approach him. The small creature stares at the young adult in curiosity, tilting his head to the side as his ears twitched, listening to the other hum and sing as he watched him draw in the mud. The small child slowly approaches and without thinking it reaches out to place its tiny hands on the mud in front of the adult male.

Y/n raised a brow in confusion at the strange small hand, looking up slowly his eyes widen. His eyes meet a pair of large black ones, panicking, he falls back on his bottom and quickly moves away from the creature. “What in the-“ before he began to ask himself questions he noticed the small green creature coo at him and giggle, his ears wiggling in excitement as he watched the others reaction.

“What the hell are you?” He asks softly and Sits himself up, he crawls over to the kid on all fours and looks at him up and down. “Hm, you are pretty cute.” He admits with a small smile, reaching out to take the child tiny hands into his own. Y/n didn’t seemed fazed by this, I mean he’s literally sitting in front of an unknown species that came form who knows where and its adorable as hell!!

“Whoa, easy...” Y/n whispered to the kid, it slowly finds its way in between his legs, sitting itself down on his lap and lets out a small squeak. Y/n chuckled at the kids little noises, he found them adorable to listen too. “Hate to sound rude or anything but where are you from?” He picks up the kid and removes him from his lap, setting him down in front of him and continue to exam him, hopping to find a hint of a known species.

As he reaches to touch the child’s ears he hears a mechanical voice say. “Get away from him!”

Y/n flinches in surprise and pulls his hand back, looking up to see a man, or what he hopes is a man, wearing an armor suit and helmet that covered his entire face. “I didn’t mean to touch him.” He quickly blurts out and stumbles to stand up.

The mandalorian held out his blaster towards the Earthian. He’s heard about these kinds of people and planet earth, he’s heard rumors going around that earth was a planet that was off limits to everyone, including the empire which surprised him the most. He’s heard the earth wasn’t allowed to be tracke doesn’t or put into their grids, no one had the audacity to visit earth but now that the empire was no longer around, who’s going to stop the mandalorian from trying to visit? The first night that he landed he made sure that he was quiet and unseen, he didn’t want to attract to many eyes and he was only going to be their for a short amount of time. He was simply going to check if their was anything that they could us for their next trip but of course, the kid suddenly decides to wander off without the mandalorian noticing. That damn kid always stuck next to him and now he suddenly decides to wander on his own? He spent hours searching for the kid only to find him interacting with an Earthian.

“I said get away from him.” His voice is full of venom, glaring under his helmet, he adjusts his blaster. The Earthian lets out a nervous laughter as he slowly stands up, “Look, I don’t want to cause trouble and neither should you so please, lower the gun, or whatever that thing is.” He held his hands up as if showing the mandalorian that he wasn’t going out hurt the kid.

The mandalorian steps forward and bends down to pick up the child, turning to look at the kid he frowns.”Womb rat.” He randomly says, earning a slight whimper in return from the kid.

Y/n was watching the two interact, taking this as his chance to make a run for it. He slowly takes a few steps back and glanced over his shoulder to find a quick way back home without causing any trouble and he also didn’t want to die, not yet. He takes another step backwards, “Don’t move.” He froze in place, hearing the mandalorian speak to him. Y/n turns to gaze at the man and bites his lip, “What is an Earthian like you doing out here?” The mandalorian asks in curiosity, he’s been staying in these woods for awhile now and he hasn’t seen any Earthians around which gave him the thought that Earthians hated the woods.

“Earthian?” Y/n raised a brow at the name he was given. “You’re not from around here are you?” He asks, ignoring the others question.

The mandalorian lowers down his blaster, “You Don’t know about us?”

“About us? About what?”

The mandalorian gave the Earthian a surprised look, everyone knew about earth and how it was forbidden to visit but he didn’t expect the Earthians to know nothing about them. “About the galaxy and other planets.” He responds.

Y/n could only give him a dumbfounded look, “I don’t think so, we only know that plants from Pluto to the sun so like,” he shrugs. “We don’t explore space as much since we aren’t that advanced.” Y/n lowers down his arms, noticing the other lower down its gun. “Look I don’t want to cause trouble, I was just walking around like usual and minding my own business until-“ he points over to the kid. “He randomly showed up, I didn’t hurt him, I may have touched his tiny hands but that’s it!” He quick says, defending himself before he could get himself killed by the strange guy.

The mandalorian holds the kid close under his arm, he gave the other a look before he puts away the blaster. “Your not from around here are you?” Y/n suddenly blurts out.

“And you don’t know anything about us.” He said back.

“Okay listen child, if you could explain to me everything in a better way then maybe I can help you or something.” His sass was showing as he leans against a tree with his arms crossed, a frown covering his face.

The mandalorian was taken back by the guys sudden sass, he felt offended when he was sudddnely called a ‘child’ when he wasn’t. “What exactly can you help me with? You earthlings are considered weak and scared.”

Y/n gasps, “For your information I am not weak nor afraid! I can help with things wether they are big or small I can do it!”

“Can You repair a ship?”

The other stutters once he was asked if he knew how to repair a ship. “W..what kind of ship?” The mandalorian lets out a deep sigh and turns around to head back towards his own ship, expecting Y/n to follow behind him as he carries the child back to their ship. Y/n follows close behind the strange man, he grips his shirt softly and looks around, his eyes landed on a large ship which caused his eyes to widen. “Holy shit—“ he breathes out in shock.

He examined the ship, walking around in circles, he gently touched the metal and breaths out a gasp. “Holy crap this is real, this is actually real.” He chuckled out. The mandalorian set done the child and allows him to roam around but close enough for him to see where he was gong. “Think you can fix it?”

“Fix it?” Y/n raised a brow. “Where ever your from, this thing probably has something that earth doesn’t have. I mean, Look at it!!” He held his arms out and gestured towards the large ass ship that he was standing next too. “I know a little bit about machinery and engineering but what you have here is nothing compared to earth, its like...different.” He shrugs and exams the side of the ship and ran his hand through some black liquid, “This isn’t fuel is it?” He question with a worried look on his face. The mandalorian sighs in disappointment, he was stuck on this planet for who knows how long. He has to get off of it and quick. “Can you try to repair it?” He ignores the others questions, he was desperate to get going.

Y/n bites his lip, glancing around before sighing as well. “I can try but I cant keep any promises that it’ll work well.” He warns and pulls out his phone to check the timing and his schedule. “Your lucky that I don’t have any classes tomorrow or else I would’ve spent the rest of my weekend watching movies.”

The mandalorian could only stare at him from under the helmet, confused by what the other was saying, he decides to ignore it and not question it. “Just get the material you need to fix it.”

“JUsT gEt tHe mAtErIaLs—“ Y/n mimics back with a slight tone of irritation. “Ill get you your damn materials.” He hissed back. The mandalorian glared back, this guy was slowly getting on his nerves. “Just do it.”

“Of course, sir.” Y/n puts his pone away and looks up at the sky, “It’s almost twilight, Best I get back home. I’ll come by early in the morning with the materials to fix your ship and then after that you can continue on with your journey or something.” He shrugs. “So do me a favor and keep yourself hidden because humans on this planet around so friendly with things they’ve never seen before, especially with the kid around. If anyone comes by and sees him, they wont hesitate to hurt him.” He explains in warning. Earth may seem peaceful but it was actually hell for Y/n.

People were getting killed everyday and wars were raging on everywhere and society was just getting worse. He feels a little envy towards the man, Y/n sighs while slipping his hands into his pockets. “Ill see you in the morning oh, and one last thing, what’s your name?” He asks.

The mandalorian was fixing up his bag that was sitting outside of the ship. “People call me Mando.”

“Seriously? Mando? You know if I’m going to be helping you then I might start calling you bob or something.” He cocks his head to the side. “Mando is fine, nothing more.”

“Whatever you say.” Y/n rubs his face and groans. “Anyways I’m gonna get going and you better take my advice also my name is Y/n in case you were wondering...bye now.” He waves goodbye and began to head back, following the trail that lead him to the main streets.

The mandalorian watched the other leave, he turns to speak to the kid. “Earthlings are very strange espically the way they talk.” He earns a small giggle in return from the kid.

#male reader #the mandalorain #the mandalorian x male reader #dyn jarren x male reader #dyn jarren #reader #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x male reader

[fics-not-tragedies]

Under the quarantine [1]

All I can say that @meetmeinthematinee​ is the one being blamed for me creating this... abomination... this... absolute filth. And yes, there will be more parts, because apparently I can’t think straight because of the lock down.

SUMMARY: John is locked with Santino in a hotel room that overlooks the stunning Piazza Navona. The Italian man's being an asshole like he always is and Wick gets really angry. Words:  2305; Warnings: angry smut, some good ol’ m/m smut;

Readers tag list:

@spookier-than-u; @oreofenyloetyloamina; @derangedcupcake; @geostarr; @catsmieow; @wickedlangdon; @bodhi-black; @bugalouie; @onebatch--twobatch​; @fandom-lover-4; @mikaneonox; @drunkonyellow; @spadesandaces2342; @harrisongslimited​; @hhighkey​; @lunilate​; @i-cant-remember-my-old-login​; @sgt-morgan​; @coloursunlimited​; @childrenofthegun​; @weminiaturestrawberry​; @silverlambcaptain​; @scarletmoon83​; @howtoruin-someones-perfect-day​; @krazycags01​; @charlottebonnie​; @moonlit-raven-haven​; @girl-at-the-verge​; @boopdedoop​; @jardani-jovonovich-bitch​; @ladyreapermc​; @wifeofdarklordsworld​; @mysticfluffyness​; @zombiepandajfish​; @kollover24​; @greenmanalishi​; @persephonehemingway​; @lovelycarose​;

“Potrei davvero usare una prostituta in questo momento” Santino gasped looking out of the window at the empty Piazza Navona. The water in the fountain was still running, yet somehow it looked much cleaner than it used to be. The pigeons chasing each other where the only living thing that were visible on the empty streets.

“Scommetto che ora sono in congedo per malattia” John chuckled, playing with the half empty tumbler in his hand.

“Hilarious John, absolutely fucking hilarious” Santino scolded him, his eyes still focused on the empty streets.

“Perhaps it’d be easier if you had a wife…”

“You had one and see how it ended” Italian man blurted out before he even had the chance to think through his words, he quickly turned around to look at Wick, “John I-I’m sorry… I… I didn’t mean that.”

“You’re a D’Antonio, you meant every word you’ve ever said” he leaned over to the small table where the bottle of whisky was located to pour himself another refill.

“Then you know that I mean it when I’m say that I’m sorry…”

“Were you truly sorry just once in your entire lifetime?” John took a slow sip from his glass eyeing the Italian. Santino stood by the windows, with his back pressed to the wall the divided one row of glass panels from the another.

“I am now, bello…” he mumbled slowly moving closer to the armchair.

“Don’t start this shit now.”

“Which shit?” Santino asked trying to sound as innocent as he could right now. John looked up at him, his doe eyes filled with rage and the Italian couldn’t help himself and rolled his lower lip between his teeth winking at Wick.

“This shit” John pointed to him with the glass he still held in his large hand, “And don’t you ever fucking call me bello again or I’ll kill you with my two own hands.”

“Oh, how exciting! It’s a shame you always threaten me with it, but you still haven’t done it… bello.”

John growled placing his glass on the table, before he quickly stood up and moved over to Santino. Grabbing the smaller man by his throat he forcefully pushed him against the wall, making him gasp loudly when his back collided with the wall.

The hand around his throat tightens its grip and he moans, letting his head fall backwards, “You’re thinking about that John, aren’t you?” He asked him, the Italian accent falling heavily on every letter, before his baby blue eyes opened just to meet John’s dark ones. He had no idea if that was plain anger or lust, or perhaps even both. They just stared at each other in silence, before Santino challenged himself to speak again, “I know you want it, John… bello, don’t be shy with me” his hand moved from the wall and onto Wick’s arm, feeling the tensed muscles through the white fabric of his shirt.

“What if I do?” John’s voice is just as coarse as his hand that’s still wounded around Santino’s neck.

“You’re at my grounds John, in my country, with my guards outside the door. If you do it there’s not coming out alive from this one, bello.”

His answer is to press the heel of his palm further into Santino’s throat. The first hit of adrenaline rushes in Santino’s veins, “I have always wondered what it would be like with you, bello” he challenged, “to be at your mercy… bello. Why this slow, John? There are at least three guns in this room-”

“I told you I would use my hands” he was cut off by John’s hoarse voice somehow too close to his ear now.

“But you can’t.”

John’s hand tightened again, “I can and I will.”

Santino feel his fingers press into the side of his neck, his thumb tight up beneath his jaw. His shoulders stiffen, his whole body is tense, trapped between the wall and John’s tall figure.

The Italian’s cheeks are flushed with heat, his hands curl into fists as Wick grips his neck with such force it’d probably leave bruises, “Do you think that this frightens me?” he muttered.

John’s thumb sink into his pulse point, like he wanted to roughly check if he’s still alive, it’s thudding against the soft skin of Santino’s neck, “Yes” he breathed.

“It’s the opposite of frightening, bello. I really like your hands…” Santino gripped John’s forearm, digging his fingers into it, the only way of defense he could possibly own in this situation. But the more he grabbed onto him, the more John crushed his throat.

He’s choked with pathetic, undignified moans. John’s thumb rolled into his pulse point, more determined to make it slower. Santino fought at the edge, but he can’t cheat what John’s hand on his throat does to him. His eyes rolled back, head sunk onto the wall behind him.

“Tell me John… have you ever been with a man before?” Santino asked, the hand that was dug into Wick’s forearm was slowly sliding down onto his side, then onto his hip, before the soft Italian fingers rubbed at the bulge in front of John’s suit pants, “It seems like we’re both equally excited, bello” he chuckled.

John growled through his gritted teeth and spun D’Antonio around so he was facing the wall now, his face forcefully shoved into it.

“Let me touch you bello, let me make you feel good” his weak plea filled John’s ears and he growled again. Santino tired to sneak his hand between their bodies, but Wick was pinning him against the wall with his body, his painfully hard erection pressed against Santino’s peachy ass.

“Don’t.”

“Bello, please…” Santino moaned when he felt John’s hand removing his shirt from where it was neatly tucked in the back of his trouser, before he raked his fingers through the soft flesh.

“Non sono il tuo puttana” John rasped into his ear, tugging his pants down harshly.

“Ho sempre amato te, John…”

“You” Wick said without loosening his grip, “are an absolute nightmare, Santino.”

“I’m your favorite worst nightmare, bello… are you just gonna just stand like that and insult me or are you actually gonna use your hands on me in different ways, John?”

John put the pressure back on Santino’s throat, fingers pressing hard enough to leave bruises. “Like that, baby?” He was being cruel, rubbing himself off against Santino’s thigh, careful not to give Santino’s hardened cock any relief, “You’re all bark and no bite, aren’t you? Just wanna be used. Fuck, I could choke you to death, and you’d take it. You’d fucking love it. Bet you’ve touched yourself thinking about what we’re doing right now, one hand on your cock, three fingers up your ass...”

“I…” Santino’s face was flushed, dark curls sticking to his forehead, tears seeping involuntarily out of the corners of his eyes, “Yes, I-I thought about tying you up. But this is…” he tilted his head slightly so he could look at Wick, his eyes meeting John’s, pupils blown wide, “Cazzo, just touch me, please touch me.”

John ignored him, “You wanna tie me up, hmm? Well, perhaps next time, pretty boy. So, how do you wanna do this?”

Santino’s voice was husky, “Want you to fuck me, bello.”

“Can’t say no to that” John grinned, and much to D’Antonio’s surprise, he tilted his head using the hand still wrapped around his throat and kissed him hungrily, tasting cigarette smoke and the whisky they both were drinking earlier.

“I’m big” he warned, tugging Santino’s boxers down, exposing his bubbly ass.

“You mean your cock or your ego?” Santino asked, with a hint of his usual sarcastic self.

John shoved a rough hand over Santino’s mouth in irritation, “Can you shut the fuck up?”

Santino’s pretty lips parted, drawing John’s index and middle fingers into his mouth. The way his cheeks hollowed as he sucked on those two fingers made John’s throat tighten, instantly regretting not having that soft wet mouth elsewhere on his body. He groaned and pulled his desperately hard cock through his zipper, jerking himself urgently now. After a moment, he yelped as he felt the sharp scrape of teeth against his fingers.

“Hurry up, bello” Santino whined.

“Bite me again and I’ll slit your throat” said John, trailing his right hand down to circle Santino’s entrance with a fingertip and making him squirm against his restraints.

“You wish.”

“I wanna tear you apart” John breathed as he pressed both spit-slick fingers inside at once, drawing a ragged gasp from Santino.

 “Just get on with it, yeah?” Santino urged, pushing back on John’s fingers and moaning deliciously when he got them at just the right angle.

“So impatient” John slid his hand up and down Santino’s throat, “Such a slut for my cock, aren’t you?”

Santino could barely speak because of the pressure that was put by John’s hand on his throat, “Yes, bello, I want…” he kicked off his pants and spread his legs wider, “I want it to hurt. Cazzo… don’t stop choking me John…”

“You’re fucked up” he lined himself up and pushed in roughly, keeping his fingers tight around Santino’s neck, pressing deeper into the bruises already blossoming there. Santino’s eyes fluttered shut, his lips parted wordlessly, and for a flash of a moment John thought he’d blacked out. Trying not to lose himself in the tight heat around his cock, he began to move experimentally, keeping his thrusts shallow, “Is this want you wanted, baby?”

Santino made a low growling sound in his throat, “Maybe if you fuck me about ten times harder.”

“You like it harder, huh? Should’ve known you’d be high maintenance” John’s tongue flicked over Santino’s bottom lip, “Ask me nicely.”

“Please, bello” whatever dignity Santino still had, he was obviously abandoning in favor of getting what he wanted. His voice was soft, hoarse. John thought he’d never seen anyone look so beautifully wrecked, “I’ll be so good for you, let you fuck me up any way you want... Just… cazzo… I need you to… please, fuck me so hard, /sir, squeeze my throat till I can’t breathe...”

John rolled his hips lazily, brushing a spot that made Santino writhe underneath him, “Think I can manage that.”

He bottomed out, giving Santino’s hair a harsh tug as he pulled back and fucked into him again, still choking him with his left hand. Santino let out a stuttering moan, “Cazzo… yes… please… harder…”

That earned him a stinging slap across the cheek, “Please what?”

“Sir, please, I need…”

With no warning besides the wicked grin on his face, John started fucking him in earnest, fast and rough and absolutely perfect pace. Santino took all of it, his mouth slack, eyes streaming almost as much as his untouched cock, “Ohhhh… cazzo, yes, just like that - oh! Unhh, there, oh, there, don’t stop, sir, please don’t stop...”

“So good for me, baby” John purred into Santino’s ear, indulging him at last, sucking a messy hickey on his neck and reaching down to take him into his hand, “So fucking hot.”

“Hit me again” Santino rasped out of nowhere and for all his forced self-control, John thought he was about to come on the spot. He stilled suddenly, his hold on Santino slackening.

“Say that again?”

“Hit my face again.” God, he wants it, he really fucking wants it.

Even as his orgasm threatened to explode, John hesitated. Santino was smaller than he was, and probably wouldn’t come off too lightly even in a fair fight. And actually, looking at Santino standing there all fucked out and vulnerable, the idea of making him hurt – really hurt – felt like a knife in the gut.

“I’m not gonna hit you, you kinky fuck” he swirled his thumb over the head of Santino’s cock, “Here, let me take care of-”

Santino’s eyes snapped open, “John, bello, please… just one slap, j-just one-” he was cut off by John’s hand that abandoned his cock, but only for a moment just to give him the desired slap across his other cheek, before it was back on Santino’s cock, squeezing it harshly, hand slowly sliding up and down his length.

John pinned Santino down by the throat against his body and began to move his hand faster, teasing the tip of his cock with his thumb until Santino’s head fell onto his arm, he made a choked sobbing noise and came all over John’s hand.

“Fuck” John gasped, drinking in that sound, that teary face completely lost in bliss. His own pleasure was tipping over the edge, everything going blurry… if he wasn’t careful he was gonna- fucking hell… 

He blew his load in a couple of quick spurts, coming inside him with a loud groan. When Santino didn’t complain, John checked to make sure he was still conscious; he was, but he looked so fucked out that John wasn’t entirely sure he really knew what was happening.

“Are you alright, Santino?” asked John, trying not to sound too concerned.

“Better than alright” Santino said in the same soft raspy voice.

He’s fucking smiling, the sick piece of shit, thought John, a huge grin appearing on his face as he noticed it.

“I’d give you a cuddle if you didn’t hate me so much” Santino snickered.

“Who said I hate you?” John asked, spinning him around, so he was facing D’Antonio once again. His hand came around his neck again, but much lighter this time, as he closed the space between them.

“Wasn’t that a hate fuck after all, John?” Santino challenged himself and leaned closer to him, brushing his thumb across John’s lips.

“I just used the opportunity” he flicked his tongue around the Italian’s finger and he purred loudly.

“I can make you another one.”

#Under the quarantine #Under the quarantine [1] #john wick #john wick fanfiction #john wick fanfic #john wick fic #john wick imagine #john wick oneshot #santino d'antonio #santino d'antonio fanfiction #santino d'antonio fanfic #santino d'antonio fic #santino d'antonio oneshot #santino d'antonio imagine #fanfiction #fanfic #fic #imagine #oneshot #john wick/santino d'antonio #john wick x santino d'antonio #john/santino #john x santino #m/m fanfiction #m/m smut #lord please forgive me I have sinned #quarantine smut #quarantine fic #quarantine writing #kr:parted_fic

[nyarisu]

Völkerball liveblogging

Dear lord this took me so long to edit you better appreciate it

Reise reise

Oooo~ but I still like the Hellfest version more :)) (Till’s face during the Hellfest chorus will always be my sexuality)

Schneider’s costume is fabulous but I’ll never trust those curls

Also vampire Reesh that’s a good look

Asdfghjklthe vagina entrance XDDD they really had to

Hello nice legs

I’ve watched this only once because i don’t like the sound. Someone said Till was sick and I don’t know what actually happened but his voice kinda sounds like it, especially more towards the middle of the live.

But the chorus is still so nice~

The tongue via Till’s fucked up slut face

Olli’s really serious

"Ist kein Licht am Horizont" REESH DO YOU WANNA KILL ME?? That was one sexy face

I really love Till’s expressions i want to kiss his face

The eyes! And then looking up to the sky<3 (was there even a sky or was inside I didn’t even notice XD)

I really don’t like Paul and Flake’s costumes

Fucking god that entrance is craking me up

Links 234

Hei hei hei!

I love how they all march on the stage

Bwhbwbwhwbhwbwhw XD

That’s a nice middle to wrap your hands around, mr Lindemann

I love when he’s hittig his chest on “links”

THE FANGS

Paul means business XD

You can’t not sing with them during links

Oh the solo<3 sounds so nice live

Thank god my favourite person from this stupid band is also the one most filmes otherwise I would’ve been in trouble

Dem boobs XD

Keine lust

I thought it was Sonne for one sec

He kicked the mic stand XD

Now you can hear he’s a little raspy

Yes Till we know the lyrics’ meaning and also that you’re horny

The chorus sounds nice again, it sounds better when he’s actually siniging vs talking

Who’s foamning at the mouth over that patch of skin under his pants, I’ve seen people talk about that (unfortunately it’s doing nothing for me)

"kaaaalt. Soo kaaaalt" I’ll keep you warm bby just don’t be sad T_T

Ok but Flake’s headpiece is actually hilariuous gotta admit

I really want to kiss Till *opening his mouth like a retarded owl* I don’t think I want anymore

Feuer frei

That was his I’m ready to slut pose XD

DONT HIT YOURSELF YOU DUMB BABY

Ooooooh Olli got shirtless (what were they calling this?)

I really like RZK’s top

Of course he’s gotta bully Flake

Chumby

I’m really trying to focus more on image but the voice is such a big thing for me and it’s clear he has something

The masks!! I love those so much

„Jaaaa”

Wow Schneider’s drumsticks went out with a literal bang

Asche zu Asche

4 lines later I finally realised what song is >.< and only because Till began to sing...

DID YOU SEE WHAT HE WAS DOING WITH THOSE DRUMSTICKS?!? I knew why I had a thing for hands/fingers

Asdfghjkl Richard strutting down the stage with his little red stripe<3

He’s a moody goth and I love his look did he just put his hands on his hips? XD

Till’s cheeks! I want to pinch his face

Everyone’s favourite part and THE NECK TILT ok wow now that was hot

Tho I usually preffer the “In zehn Tagen” to RZK’s “Ich komm wieder” now it was the opposite (probably because I couldn’t see Till that well) and Reesh acting all sexy was definitely improving it

Go Flake go XD he’s so serious and by the end he’s having the time of his life meanwhile Till is having an existential crisis (another)

Olli’s abs are heeeeella nice

Till with his hand over his heart didn’t help his case

Yeah Richard ok you’re sexy i get it holly fuck I’ve never been more attracted to him

And now i’ll never be able to unsee the neck tilt

That ich kom wieder just unmade me

Morgenstern

Bath time XD

I really like when Till slicks his hair back

Dear lord the chorus thank you for your voice sir and congrats on it

I really like the general image of a bassist playing their bass (other verb I could’ve used was fingering XD that’s literally what he’s doing!!)

Ooooh the keyboards sound so nice<3

DON’T pluck your eyes out!

The fire part is really impressive

I love then Richard is doign his gay boy pose XD and then the closeup on him while bobbing his head

I need to say once again the chorus sounds wundershon

Mein Teil

The first 2 seconds I thought it was MHB

Paul and Richard walking towards each other<3

Aaaand the epicness begins!

Schneider is fabulous behind his drums, can’t forget about him

YEET

The tongue’s is at it again

FLAKE POPING UP WITH THAT SMILE CRACKED ME UP you demented human

People are rocking the hell out this song

“durch Engelsscharen” Till’s expression<3

And the maddnes begins. Wow it was shorter than usual... obviously, it was at the beginning

Flake has such a special style of running I can’t XD

Stein um Stein

And everyone is gonna talk about him drawing a house xD it was cute (considering what the song is about)

You’re being a slut again

Aaaaah I want to complain about the playback but I really can’t I rather prefer him with vocal cords. At least the rest of the song sounded excelent!

The little sound at the end of „sein” and his face: childish enjoyment while talking about fucked up shit. If this doesn’t perfectly summarize Till then I don’t know what does

Schenider’s smile

No but really beside the screeching parts he sung it so well!

Were they trying to film Richards crotch? Whatever he’s sexy

Another reason why I watch this only once before was me being kind of meh regarding Till’s look he’s my favourite after all I gotta act the part

Los

My fucking god Scheider’s legs! I fucking love thighs. And he has a nice ass too

Richard’s smile!! Don’t kill me

Is it me or does Till start to stare into space and look generally Not Ok (tm)?

„fucking mickey mouse” XDDD

Los is among the last 10 songs on my list I usually just skip it

I died when I saw him with a harmonica the first time

Flake and Olli XD

Don’t manhandle poor Flake (I really want to say I wish that were me but knowing myself I would probably just deck Till in the face XD)

The sunglasses are sick

RZK and Till headbaning<3

Rip (rest in pieces) to keyboard

Du riechts so gut

THE BOW! The cute flamingo pose aside, that bow is one of my favourite pyro effects ever

And then the synchronised bodybanging<3

That „pang” never sounded so good?

WHY THE FUCK DID YOU EVEN MENTIONED THE NECK TILT REESH IS SO SEXY HERE I CAN’T EVEN

The deepest he sings the lees you hear the raspiness

Lord! The whole audience just fucking went for it

Schneider’s muscles, Richard’s little smirk and Till zombie 2.0

Even more bodybanging. Flake is enjoying himself

WHAT THE FUCK WHY ARE YOU SO PRETTY?!? (me to Richard)

Flake casually going back to his keyboards uthgjkhfzc that looked so cool and smooth

I promise I still drool over Till just... Richard is so prettily standing there! I cant ignore him!

The firesleeves are so cool and it looks so good, especially with them facing different ways

And freeze! Nice and dramatic

Till hammer time

That one guy really feeling the „DRSG” in the audience XD

Benzine

3 consecutive thought: it is Benzine fuck yeah, I can never tell if it’s Benzine or Keine Lust, Till’s terrified face

The most Rammstein song to ever Rammstein

Paul going wild XD but I still don’t like his hat

Flake is spazzing again

Du hast

Thank god I’m actually enjoying this song now, I skipped it for half a year

The drums and the beginning and the keyboards are <3

The tongue >w<

People are going wild

I like Richard’s dramatic gesturing. Pretty rockstar boy

The chorus sounds so good

Flake what is that on your head? XD is he a One Piece character?

Did he just casually shoved the mic into his pocket? XD

I much more preffer the newest effect from Paris onwards (which is also my top favourite)

Sehnsucht

This song has a very special and unique feel to it probably because it screams Live aus Berlin more than any other (and now I feel like watching LAB again)

It’s the chanting in the background probably

He’s sounding sick again :(

You have muscles in the arms (and probably legs too) and chumby in the belly it’s perfect

Lol @ Paul trying to look scary

„SEHNSUCHT!”

Ok Richard honey you can stop with the sexy neck tilt

He’s slapping the hell out of his guitar

Please stop pulling your hair out

Amerika

@Flake on that thing: wierd flex but ok

Sexy fishnet legs

Wow that’s a really soft and nice opening, pretty unexpected

LOL Flake taking off his hat like „sorry for your loss” but considering the song it’s expected from him XD

Beauatiful eyes<3

He’s just nyooming from one side of the stage to the other? XD

That eyeliner looks so fucking good on Till

Flake is suffering :)) (what the fuck was I talking about I can’t remember now that I’m editing)

Even Richard’s hair looks pretty! What the fuck??

The last scene with Schneider (and then his legs)

Rammstein

Those are some fucking guns he has right there

This is the most badass intrumental intro ever

“Scheeeeeein”

Oooooh so this is where that gif was coming from for some reason it thought it was Engel from MSG. Does this live even has Engel on it?

I love when drummers throw their sticks in the air and then catch them again

Ok the image of Till slowly backing off between Paul and Richard who were both vibing in their own way was really nice

Sonne

Schneider is enjoiying this isn’t he XD

For some reason this song doesn’t seem as energic as it usually is?

Was Till humping the mic stand? (more likely than you’d think)

Seing Flake and Till doing the hammer side by side is really funny, that’s some size difference

Ich will

Bye bye mic stand again

Till baby what did you do with your throat to make your voice sound like that?

Richard looking to the side during „ich will” hhhhhHhh

Let me slap that ass Till

I want to lick your face

Ohne dich

Ollie what are you doing

Asdfhjkl Flake comforting Till and the way he just rests his head on Flake’s shoulder is breaking my heart

Poor baby come here and let me love you

You can clearly see he’s trerrified

Lsnhxkvj his eyes<3

Nawwww they are kissing

I am silently thristing over Till don’t mind me

Please don’t cry T_T and then him looking over his bangs sfdghjkl

„is he... ya know” pose with a hand in the air Heirate mich style (aka Till Lehmann is a sub)

Look I know he’s suffering and all but I really can’t focus on that with all the water dripping off him

Stripped

No wonder I didn’t recognised the song it doensn’t even exist to me XD

Till pointing like „you. drop your panties. now” XD

I had half a mind to skip it but then I would have missed Till’s wonderful tongue performance

Was he flicking it to the rythm??

Hearing him sing in english is always so weird (I only recently rediscovered the gem the Children of the Sun is)

Richard what was that sexy face?

Ollie is braving the human seas, telepathy at its finest XD

Hmm that is a really nice lower back

Gangsta XD „how do you do fellow kids”

Paul is enjoying the show

Schneider has killer looks. Literally XD

YEET

Conclusions:

Half of it went really slow and then the other half went really fast? I don’t understand what happened

So this is the setting for Mit Dir Bin Ich Auch Allein... ok, good to know ;)

You sure this was a good idea 4 songs in and I already wrote 2 pages, now the total is at 6.

I’m not particulary fond of the looks and Till sounds sick so I usually avoid this live. Also some songs are weird with the energy so yeah

Richard is so pretty I can’t (and fucking hot how come I don’t remeber this??)

#rammstein #rammbois #liveblogging #I have a temporal crush on Richard quick I need to read some fics #but no seriously why was he so pretty?? #Rena's R+ ramblings

[eternalnightone]

SINCE HE HAD TO DIE APPARENTLY ALLOW ME TO DO A THING.

Clarke, right as shes about to step into yet another bridge hears the end murmurs of Sheidhedas words.

"book....throne..."

She watches as Bellamy, her ex-best friend, now she doesnt know what to call him, walks over and takes it up. A small leather bound book, with Madis drawings in it. Every page holding the answer Cadogan has been looking for.

"Bellamy no," she steps closer, "give it to me."

She watches as he turns each page, his eyes misty with relief. He found the key. He can save All of them.

"Clarke, this is it." He raises the book with a soft smile. "This is how we do better."

Is he nuts? He must be. She cant imagine he would sacrifice their- HER daughter like this. Madi sweet pure Madi, how can he fathom putting her in harm's way yet again. Sure he did it before but sfeeding her mind to the masses and making giving her the burden of Heda vs feeding her mind to an ACTUAL Lunatic, that's a whole other ballpark. Bellamy wouldnt do that. And yet she doubts because his smile says otherwise. Clarke sees red.

"Bellamy dont do this." Raising the gun she ignores the tremble in her hand. "Give me the book....please."

"You wont shoot me Clarke."

God she wants to. Sonething wicked whispers how poetic is would be to put a bullet in his heart. But she couldnt. And he knows that. She hates how certain he sounds of that, but hes right.

"You're right." Her voice cracks and he feels it on his skin. Hes hurting but he has to. He has to save her.

Shes so tired of this. Tired of being here, holding a gun to all who threaten her and her lived ones, but she needs that book. She has to protect her daughter. Lowering the gun she watches his shoulder sag in relief and knows she has to come with something else, the only other thing that should work. She keeps in mind that she only has a few seconds to play this off.

"Bellamy, please think about Madi." she steps closer, keeping her eyes on his. " Think about Octavia, Echo, Raven,Murphy, Emori! Is this really for us? Is this really for me?"

He hears her desperation and it frustrates him that she doesnt understand. Why cant she see this is how they transcend. He can save them now finally. Squaring his shoulders he holds the book out.

"Yes it is Clarke. This will save you. All of you"

Shes so close he can see the tears in her eyes, still as blue and demanding as the day he first saw her in the dropship. Shes always stood beside him, even if it was to argue, but this time he doesnt see annoyance or anger, not even mirth. This time her eyes are sad, desolate, empty.

"I'm sorry then," she says. "I have to save all of us too."

Before he realizes Clarke grabs the book and heads to the closing bridge. Time slows down for everyone. Bellamy hears the bullet before he sees it and something primal takes over. He blocks the shot and only manages to hear her scream before the green vortex swallows her whole. He may not have the book, he may not have the answers but hes done what hes always set out to do. He saved her.

"May we meet again, Clarke Griffin."

#the 100 #bellamy x clarke #bellarke #ending scene #100 spoilers #i wrote this in my phone its 12:30AM and im just tired okay he deserved a better send off #even if he died in his stupid robe he should've died as Bellamy

[cloudywithachanceofwatering]

the galtean tattoos & piercings [ mostly for the brave ]

note - @princesss353 AGAIN !! YALL SHE A BLESSER AND SHES NOT A MESSER HER AUS ARE GODSPEED

preface - lotor is the owner of ' the galtean tattoos & piercings ' on a busy street next to ' the altean cafe stop ' . he and matt are bffs till the end and are pro wingman , efficiently wingman-ing romellura . so obviously , allura and romelle constantly advertise lotor's shop and lotor does the same back . it's a literal fight about whose shop is the best .

so when keith's piercing gets infected , it's a shiteshow .

-------------------------------------------------------

" shiro . shiro shiro . my piercing's like red and there's some pus thing and clear liquid coming out . help . how do i deal with this . "

" keith ... " shiro started , putting down his newspaper and sighing . " you've gotten a cartilage piercing but you ... oh gosh my good plant soil whatever have you done ???? " shiro stood up abruptly , promptly analyzing keith's ear . " see , i don't know how to answer that question but can we go and check my ear please ? " keith asked desperately , unhanding shiro from his ear and sucking in air as the pain hit him .

basically three whole seconds later , they were in front of a tattoo and piercing shop known for their menacing looks but kind hearts . shiro just stared up at the neon purple sign , the letters glowing in cursive as he sighed and followed keith in , the little door bell ringing softly .

the bell was muted softly as they entered the room , buzzing from tattoo clients and a soft piercing gun clicking down . shiro looked around , slightly confused as he had never really been into this shop , only keith had . he smiled a bit at the walls of polaroids of people who got piercings and tattoo , following keith slowly . he turned his attention back to keith , watching him talk to a short but somewhat muscular boy who was busy drawing out something and had stopped to talk to keith . shiro couldn't see much really , the boy - girl ? - had a big brown mess of fluffy wavy hair that was in a cute little bob , much like pidge's .

oh . so it's the legendary pidge ?

shiro timidly stood behind keith and overheard their sweet conversation , feeling slightly like a intruder . " so like ... yeah " " we'll ... try ... clean ... fixed ... time !! " " shiro's ... guardian ... change ... " wait , wait . pause . rewind . did shiro just - " what ?? so you're changing legal guardians ? " he blurted out , instantly realizing his mistake and got even more flustered .

pidge looked up and laughed a bit , then twirled her hair around her finger , tugging a bit . " so , if it isn't the infamous insufferably innocent boy , " pidge said in a low voice . wait . shiro felt a blush rising to high heavens going up his cheeks as he stared at the figure and zoned out , and curled up in his brain . the now called pidge imposter looked him up and down .

keith smirked , " it isn't pidge , it's her brother . matt . don't be so gay now , get over yourself for a second . " he teasing elbowed him , shiro coming back to earth . " o-oh uhm yikes hahahaahaaaaaa ... s-sooorrryy ?? " he drawled , looking at keith for help and seeing his little sly smile spread like butter accross his face .

the stout little boy just looked up to him and smiled defiantly , raising a eyebrow . " takashi shirogane , the infamous softie ! how adorable , are you here for a tattoo or a piercing ? " he teased , finally releasing his hair strand . shiro stared at the hair bouncing against the rest of the mess once , twice , physics isn't real .

" uuuhhhh ... " keith just dragged matt to a seat . " ignore him , he's just processing all of this madness , how's your industrial going ? " matt just laughed , " it's doing good , my boy . anyway , so i got triple helixes and - " keith just looked at him in feigned shock . " what ? i left for what - three months and now you're all decked out without me ?! " all the piercing terms flew over shiro's head as he sat next to keith , knowing he looked less confused than he actually was .

matt quickly whipped out his phone . " okay so like i'll take out your infected ear , it won't hurt too much , just chill and stalk my instagram a bit , " he joked , calming down keith as best as he could as he wore gloves and wiped down the area . shiro winced before keith did , feeling anxious as heck . " hey keith , it's okay , it's nothing much , others probably have it worser , " he squeezed his hand encouragingly , smiling to him . matt just glanced at him and grinned appreciatively , then made him look at his triple helixes at its full glory and then suddenly - the piercing was out and the pain was hitting . matt quickly wiped the area down and numbed it with some spray , patting keiths shoulder and hushing him soothingly , blowing his ear a bit to try and calm the pain even more .

shiro just freaked out .

pt 2 👀👀👀 bc my phone cant take this anymore andi have to go rest my last brain cell

ill reblog n type for efficiently for the readers UWUWUWUWUWU

#shatt #voltron shiro #vld shiro #vld matt #voltron matt #vld lotor #vld allura #vld romelle #voltron #voltron pidge #vld pidge #vld paladins #voltron allura #voltron ships #voltron shitpost #cloudyhadachanceofwatering

[descendantofthesparrow]

Daughter of the Honorable thief - Harry Hook x reader - part 3 - threat and games

Harry Hook x Daughter of Robin Hood!Reader

 key

 h/c- hair color

 e/c- eye color

 h/l- hair length

 s/c- skin color

 y/n- your name

 clothing reference:

  ---

Harry gave a tired sigh as he entered History of pirates and wood, he and Gil had gorged themselves on ice cream and candy all night and now he was suffering from not enough sleep, a sugar crash, and a stomach ache.

Glancing up he paused, there was (y/n), sitting in the seat next to his, her sketchbook open and her pencil flittering around on the page.

Harry smirked, plopping down next to her, and rose his brow flirtatiously, leaning in close to her.

“Hello, lassie~ I thought yeh sat in the back of the class? didn't know ye were meh seatmate now, were yeh just that into meh that yeh had ta switch seats to be next to meh?”

(y/n) snorted and shoved his face away gently, grinning back at him.

“nah, you and I were the only ones without a seatmate, and the teach asked me if I would be willing to move next to you, nothing like what you’re suggesting hooky~, by the way, I like the jacket”

Harry snickered, quickly grasping her hand and bringing it to his lips, making (y/n) giggle at the sensation.

“sorry, I couldn’t resist teasing such a pretty face~ and thanks, evie made it for meh, since I can't wear my long red one all the time, so she made me this one”

“Mr. Hook, Ms. Loxley, if I could begin my lesson please?”

Henry Turner, the class teacher, called out to both of you, making harry drop your hand and grin sheepishly at him.

You snickered and rolled your eyes, nodding at the teacher. He rose his brow and turned to the whiteboard.

“Alright today, we are talking about the brethren court.

Now, who can tell me the last king of the brethren court's name?”

Harry furrowed his brow, he felt like he should know this, being a pirate and all, but his brain drew a black, but in the corner of his eye, he saw (y/n)s hand shoot up.

“yes, Ms. Loxley?”

“Elizabeth Swan sir”

“good, now how is the king chosen?”

Once more (y/n)s hand shoot up, Mr. Turner pointed at her with a smile.

“they are chosen through a vote, though it usually ends in an impasse, as pirates only ever vote for themselves.”

“correct! And very educated Ms. Loxly, now how did Elizabeth become the king?...go ahead Ms. Loxley”

“Elizabeth voted for herself and jack sparrow also ended up voting for her.”

“correct! Now extra credit to who comes up here to name all the pirate lords from Elizabeth swans reign”

Mr. Turner had written on the board numbers, from 1-9.

(y/n) stood up and made her way to the whiteboard, Harry had been staring at her in awe the entire time, jaw dropped.

(y/n) quickly wrote down the names on the board, along with the areas of the sea and oceans they command over.

1. Ammand - Pirate Lord of the Black Sea

2. Hector Barbossa - Pirate Lord of the Caspian Sea

3. Chevalle - Pirate Lord of the Mediterranean Sea

4. Ching - Pirate Lord of the Pacific Ocean

5. Jocard - Pirate Lord of the Atlantic Ocean

6. Jack Sparrow - Pirate Lord of the Caribbean Sea

7. Sumbhajee Angria - Pirate Lord of the Indian Ocean

8. Elizabeth Swann - Pirate Lord of the South China Sea

9. Eduardo Villanueva - Pirate Lord of the Adriatic Sea

(y/n) grinned and tossed the marker to Mr.Turner, strutting back to her seat.

“all correct Ms.Loxley! impressive!”

As (y/n) sat down, Harry turned to her with wide eyes.

“Lassie where did yeh learn all that?!” (y/n) grinned and tapped her finger on Harry's nose, giggling.

“hehe I had a pirate phase when I was younger and I researched everything about them, and I simply retained the information after that~”

Harry snickered back, softly smiling at her in awe, this girl was just surprising him left and right.

The two chatted as class continued on, easily answering the teacher when he questioned them.

As Harry made his locker, he noticed (y/n) trailing behind him, smirking he turned around, now walking backward, licking his lips.

“now-now lassie~ do yeh like meh that much that yeh havta follow meh everywhere I go~”

(y/n) rolled her eyes and snorted, shaking her head. “no you doofus, my locker is right next to yours, that’s how I saw you being cornered by the lost boys”

Harry hummed and spun around, stopping at his locker. (y/n) stopped as well and locked hers, putting her books away as Harry grabbed his English books.

As they chatted, Happy’s son, Henry, walked up with a shy smile on his face.

“Hello, (y/n), um I was wondering if you would like to hang out today? Have some pleasant company?”

Harry caught the meaning behind the boy's words and rolled his eyes, of course, yes get the filthy pirate away from the maiden!

But once more, (y/n) surprised him.

“you’re about as subtle as a shit stain on white carpet, get lost”

Henry squeaked and bolted, figurative tail between his legs.

Harry and (y/n) glanced at each other before they burst out laughing

“HAHA oh my god lassie!!” Harry spoke through his laughter, tears spilling out of his eyes, “ yeh just continue to surprise meh! Haha!”

(y/n) chortled and winked, giving him finger guns, before turning back to her locker and digging into it for a couple of seconds before pulling back and tossing him a long blue plastic package.

Oreos. Harry smiled and nodded his thanks, (y/n) nodded back and shut her locker, backing away slightly. “I gotta go, it's my free period and the archery range is always empty at this point. See ya hook!”

“see ya, lassie!”

Harry turned and started to make his way to English class, while also opening his oreos, sticking his tongue slightly in concentration.

Looking down at the plastic packaging, he wasn’t watching where he was going and therefore didn’t see as someone walked down the hall and harshly slammed into his shoulder, Harry winced, thankfully not dropping his snack, but continued on, determined to open this dammed bag of oreos.

“filth like you should be sent back to the isle”

Harry stopped and slowly turned, his face dark.

“wha did yeh say yeh arsehole?”

Aaron, son of Esmerelda and Phoebus, stood several feet away from him glaring at Harry.  “you heard me filth’

Harry growled, but restrained himself, the vks cant fight rule was only lifted yesterday, and it only counted when they were provoked, so he turned his cheek and continued on. Ignoring the other boy's taunts.

“Hook”

Harry groaned but turned and rose his brow, “wha’?”

The tanned skinned boy sneered and glared at him, an odd glint in his eyes, “stay away from (y/n), she’s mine.”

Harry snorted and gave a sly grin, his knuckles cracking at the possessive claim. “oh really? She never mentioned yeh been the time been chilling with each other, yeh sure yer that important to her, or even on her friend?”

Aaron snarled and spit at Harrys feet. “just stay away from her pirate, you'll regret it if you don’t.”

Aaron turned and stalked away, Harry rolled his eyes, please, this boy was less intimidating than lefou’s son.

But...Harry frowned, what was concerning, was the boy's obvious obsession with (y/n).

Hearing the bell for English class ring out, he sped up into a sprint and resolved to tell Uma after school ended.

---

Later after school ended, Harry sat with Uma and Gil, doing his math homework,  gritting his teeth over a particularly hard question.

Oh wait he wanted to talk to Uma about Aaron and (y/n), lifting himself off of Gil's lap slightly, he turned to Uma.

“Uma” the teal haired black girl hummed and glanced at Harry, but the stern look on his face made her sit up from leaning on Gil's arm and realize this was going to be a serious talk between the two of them.

“Harry? What's up?”

Harry sighed and ran his hand through his fluffy brown-black hair, thinking of ways to convey his concern for (y/n).

“so I was making my way to English class and someone bumped me and said; “filth like yeh should be sent back teh the isle”.”

Gil and Uma glared at the words, Uma grit her teeth, but stopped herself from going on a rant, she could tell that wasn’t what was bothering Harry.

“well,” Gil mumbled, scratching the side of his face, “that’s a really rude thing for an Auradon kid to say isn’t it?”

Uma shrugged, at least it was just words, it wasn’t as bad as the dudes here who felt that just when a girl looked at them, the girl owed them a relationship or sex.

“nah, but that’s not all, he threatened me, over (y/n)”

That made Uma pause, “(y/n)?? as in (y/n) Loxley?”

Harry nodded and continued “aye, he claimed (y/n) was ‘his’ and told me to stay away from her and id regret it if I didn’t”

Uma took a breath, thinking over the implications of what the boy said.

“so, there is a boy who is obviously obsessed with (y/n) and probably dangerously so”

Harry and gil stared at Uma as she muttered to herself.

“alright” the two boys sat up, Uma used her captain voice, when she uses that voice, you pay attention. “im going to ask (y/n) about this, she needs to know, so maybe she can put out a report on him or something like that.”

Harry nodded and reached over from Gil's lap, sneaking some of Umas coveted soda flavored jelly beans, snickering when he narrowly avoided a slap of his hand from Uma.

Drawing back he stuffed the beans into his mouth. Giggling at Uma slapping his shoulders.

“well~ you sure look comfortable~”

Looking up, Harry saw (y/n), staring down at him, grinning down and giggling.

Harry smirked and sat up slightly, grasping (y/n)s hand “im even more relaxed now that yer here darling~”

(y/n) rolled her eyes, withdrawing her hand from Harrys and plopping down next to Uma, who offered her coveted jelly beans.

“flirt, anyway I just came by to ask if yall wanted to play some video games with me?”

“sure,” Uma nodded, before remembering that she wanted to ask (y/n) about Aaron. “one question tho,” (y/n) hummed around her jelly beans and gestured for Uma to continue “do you know of a dude named Aaron?”

(y/n) groaned and flopped on her back, “yeah I know of him, he's a fucking creep, did he threaten one of you?”

“yeah, harry”

“uggg! Im guessing he claimed me as ‘his’, next time he does that shit, smack him for me.”

(y/n) had obviously dealt with Aaron before, and was tired of his shit.

Gil, sensing the tension in the air decided to cut it with bringing up the offer (y/n) made moments before, “so video game?”

(y/n) perked up, oh yeah! She sat up and grinned at the three teen pirates, “its called super smash bros, it’s a brawling game, its super fun! Do ya guys wanna play?”

The three glanced around at each other, before (y/n)s exited grin turned to a sneaky smirk

“winner gets to smack the loser with a plate full of whipped cream~”

The three teens jumped up from their spots and quickly packed up their stuff, eagerly following (y/n) back to her room to play.

An hour and a half later, (y/n) was filling a plate Uma was holding while Gil held Harry down as he screeched.

“Uma cheated!!! She cheated!! Im not letting her smash cream on meh face let meh go Gil!!”

Gil was just laughing as you topped off the plate and Uma grabbed the can and sprayed some into her mouth, before grinning down at Harry.

“nonononon AH!”

The three of you burst out laughing as Harry's face and hair was covered in the white substance, he made as ‘eeugh’ sound as he wiped his eyes and flicked his hands to remove the cream.

“yeh all suck”

“nah” (y/n) giggled, squirting some cream onto her finger, “you agreed to the consequences of losing and you lost! Fair and square!”

“whatever” Harry mumbled as he rolled his eyes, grunting he stood up from the ground and walked into the bathroom to clean up.

“so (y/n)” Uma asked, (y/n) smiled and hummed, looking over at Uma. “how long has Aaron been acting like that?”

(y/n) rolled her eyes and huffed, “since middle school, he had this idea in his head that we were made for each other. “

Uma nodded before something came to her mind.

“one more question,” (y/n) nodded, tilting her head “why are you being so nice to us, no one else is?”

(y/n) looked down at the floor of her dorm, before staring right into Umas eyes, speaking loud enough for gil and harry to hear her.

“I guess its because I know you’ve all had a shit life, and you deserve some kindness.”

Uma stared at the (h/c) girl for a moment, before she broke her gaze and looked down at the floor.

“Um, thanks…I guess”

(y/n) smiled and bumped Umas shoulder with hers. “no problem”

A few moments of silence, other than harry using the sink int the bathroom, then (y/n) spoke up once more.

“umm, I know we've been hanging out, but I was wondering if you guys would be willing to be friends?”

Harry poked his head out of the bathroom, the whipped cream now clean from his head. The three pirates looked at each other before a smirk overcame on Umas face.

“sure, but you can only join our group if you do one thing.”

(y/n) tilted her head, raising her brow “and that is?”

Uma cackled, the boys smirking, knowing what was going to happen.

“prank mal.”

…

They thought (y/n) would deny the deal, but once again she surprised them.

A devious smirk spread on (y/n)s face, already having a million pranks going through her brain.

“deal, when do you want me to do it?”

Uma cackled, ah they found they best Auradon kid ever.

“as long as it's within the week”

“I got one already, it'll be done by tomorrow morning”

“can't wait to see what yeh do lassie~!”

--end of part 3--

Comment or message me for part 4

#descendants #Descendents #disney descendants #harry hook #harryhook #descendants harry hook #harry hook descendants #harry hook x reader #harry hook imagine #thomas doherty #daughter of the honorable thief

[mydarlingvioletine]

‘Just a Puppy Crush’

Ship(s): Violet/Clementine

Media: The Walking Dead Game (Season 4)

Summary: a zombie-less modern AU in which two dorks finally get together with the help of their friends.

                        Chapter 1

It started out with an invitation Violet found on her desk. A light purple envelope, her name written on it in beautiful calligraphy.

                 Well, it started a little bit before that.

Violet missed her alarm. And six of the backup ones she had set in advance. Her mother had left early for her shift at the diner and her father didn’t come home last night, so she slept peacefully and uninterrupted.

Until she lazily stretched out with a yawn, eyes opening and landing on the alarm clock across her.

                     7:20

She hardly had time to register what it said before the alarm started angrily beeping again.

        “Holy shit… Fuck… Shit!” Violet scrambled to get up, smacking the top of the alarm clock to silence the robotic screaming. She threw her sheets to the side, grabbing her jacket off the door hook on the way out.

While vigorously brushing her teeth, she looked down at her phone.

            15 missed messages from Pain in My Ass.

[ur uber is Here… am outside]

[got your drink & bagel, where are u?]

[viiiioooooleeet]

[ v i o l e t ]

[did you put the key in a different spot?]

[coward.]

Violet scrolled through the herd impatiently, getting to the latest messages, about 15 minutes ago.

[violet please fucking get up i didnt do my english homework i need to copy off of you marlon won’t let me copy his anymore]

[fuck i have to go i cant be late to pre-session but I’ll have brody come check on you to see if you can make the late entrance with her! ill keep your breakfast with me im sure mr. everett wouldn’t give a shit if you ate in class. i do it all the time]

          As if on cue, there was a faint, nervous knock on the door. God bless Brody.

“Be right there!” Violet shouted, quickly throwing her work messily into her backpack. She grabbed a couple dollars off the kitchen table for lunch, threw on her boots, and booked it towards the door.

     "Hey,“ Brody grinned at the shaggy-haired, droopy-eyed messy Violet in front of her. "Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.”

Violet grimaced, mumbling to herself as she ducked into the passenger seat of Brody’s truck. She caught a glimpse of herself in the rearview mirror, and pulled up the hoodie of her jacket to cover her shame.

         The drive felt like forever, with Brody’s insufferable choice of music. Who still listens to Coldplay? In 2019? Violet was too grateful to complain, and clenched her jaw to hold her tongue.

Brody tried to hold a conversation, but Violet was too out of it to contribute anything other than nods and the occasional “mhm.”

      “Then Marlon was mad at me! I can’t believe that guy. I swear, if he wasn’t my best friend I’d…” Brody’s voice petered out as she pulled into the school parking lot, backing into her spot next to Louis’ car.

Violet immediately jumped out, gave a quick “thankyousomuchioweyouone,” and booked it towards the front doors of the school. The front desk ladies were distracted, so Violet was able to sneak past them and make her way down to the math wing.

            106… 108… 110!

Relieved, Violet peeked through the window, seeing Marlon’s pathetic excuse for a haircut as confirmation that she was at the right place.

     She tried her best to quietly open the door as to not interrupt the class and draw attention to herself, but wasn’t surprised when the door noisily creaked open, everyone’s heads turning towards her.

Really, Ericson? Ever heard of WD 40?

Violet shyly ducked her head, placing herself between Louis and Aasim. Before she could say anything, Louis placed her coffee and bagel on her desk, a patient smile on his face.

         Violet was able to manage a “thank you” while she was scarfing down the bagel. Cheeks full and a dab of cream cheese hanging on her top lip, it’s safe to say that she did not expect Clem to approach her desk at that moment with the worksheet she’d missed.

“Hey, Vi,” Violet’s head jerked up, meeting eyes with Clementine. Embarrassed, she took a tissue and wiped her face, swallowing before she took the worksheet from Clem’s hands. “Grabbed this for you.”

        “Thanks,” Violet managed to stammer, giving a sheepish smile while pulling her pencil case out of her pocket. Clementine hadn’t moved.

Violet tensed up, waiting for Clem to make a comment on her appearance or tease her. Instead, she placed an envelope on top of the worksheet, uncertainty embedded in her actions.

         "Uh, that’s for you. I’m having a birthday party tomorrow night at my house.“ Clem pushed the envelope towards her with emphasis, and cleared her throat nervously. "You don’t have to come if you don’t want. It’s on a Friday night and I know you probably have pla-”

“No,” Violet interrupted her, her voice louder than she anticipated. She received an exhausted look from Mr. Everett. “I’ll totally be there.”

      Clementine immediately perked up, a dorky smile on her face. “Awesome. Oh, and it’s gonna be a sleepover. You don’t have to stay for that.”

Violet frowned, cocking her head and looking at Clem under a suspicious lens. “You don’t have to invite me, y'know.” She sighed, placing the envelope back into Clementine’s hands. “I get it.”

        Clem froze up, visibly upset. “No, fuck. I really want you to come. I just didn’t know if that was your kind of thing.”

Violet, unconvinced, lowered her eyes and took a sip of her coffee. Cold. The heat of Clem’s hand covering her own was a nice contrast to that.

            Wait.

“I want you there,” Clementine insisted, squeezing her hand between her own. The heat from the touch quickly flushed to Violet’s face, her pale skin unable to mask the blush that covered it. “Please come.”

     Louis and Aasim exchanged an annoyed glance at the useless sapphics. Mr. Everett had stood up and taken an interest to their conversation at this point.

“Clem, go back to your seat please,” Mr. Everett cleared his throat, to which Clem recoiled, dropping Violet’s hand. “Violet is more than capable and doesn’t need hands-on help.”

       Clem, face red and flustered, ducked her head and moved back to her seat in the front of the classroom. “Sorry, da- I mean Mr. Everett.” She squeaked, glancing over her shoulder one more time at Violet, uncertainty and sadness on her face.

Mr. Everett continued the lecture, but Violet was too busy staring out the window. She was completely zoned out. She figured she’d just get the notes from Aasim later. She saw Louis give her the occasional worried glance out of the corner of her eye, and kept her focus on the kids playing in the courtyard.

      The class couldn’t have gone any slower, but eventually the bell rang, and all the tension that had built up in Violet’s muscles was relieved.

She didn’t know why this class stressed her out so much. She was pretty good at math, only the second highest grade in the class behind Aasim. Mr. Everett made her feel uneasy.

     He wasn’t a bad guy. Quite the opposite, really. He was a fun teacher who had gone to great lengths to help Violet out with her work. A little by-the-book, but a big sweetheart.

   Plus, he picked on Louis a lot. So he was pretty likeable in her eyes.

Clementine had gone up to Mr. Everett and they were now talking, Clem dropping the classroom decorum to tug on his arm and take a $5 dollar bill out of his wallet for lunch.

        Violet didn’t realize she was staring until both of their gazes landed on her. Startled, she pulled her hoodie back over her head and started gathering her books as quick as she could. She could hear distant murmuring, but couldn’t make anything out.

Her panic was interrupted by Louis swinging an arm around Violet’s shoulders, holding an almost identical envelope up in front of her face, but it was green.

     "If it’s about transportation, I can pick you up. C'mon, the Vi I know and love would never miss out on a chance to get her ass handed to her in Super Smash Bros.“ Louis teased, earning a playful punch on the shoulder from Violet.

"Yeah, right,” Violet rolled her eyes, looking over at Aasim to see he also had one, but orange. “You going?”

       "Nah, my moms are taking me camping this weekend.“ Aasim chirped, a glint of mischievousness in his voice. Noticing the curious glances from his two friends, he cracked an evil grin and spoke one word. "Campfire.”

“Smokey the Bear, Aasim,” Violet giggled, shaggy hair falling in front of her eyes. “What can you do to prevent forest fires?”

       Louis laughed while Aasim rolled his eyes, picking up his backpack and swinging it over his shoulder. “I’ll see you guys at lunch.”

Aasim was gone for what seemed like half a second when Clementine appeared at her desk again, followed by Mr. Everett. Violet froze, her grip on her books tight.

      “My dad wants to introduce himself. Not as Mr. Everett, but as ‘Cool Dad Lee.’” Clem raised her hands to make air quotes, while Le- Mr. Everett held out his hand to shake Violets’.

        Bewildered, she shook his hand.

“Hello, Violet,” Mr. Everett looked happy, glancing between Clem and she. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

      That line earned an elbow in the stomach from Clementine. Violet, still frozen, gave a robotic laugh.

“Oh, I wanted to tell you to ignore that part of the envelope where it says 'presents mandatory.’ My mom is a bit of a smart-ass.” Clem snorted, before cocking an eyebrow over at Louis. “Not you though, rich boy.”

       Louis gave her some finger guns, a big, goofy smile on his face. “Respect for that.”

The second bell rang, interrupting the conversation. Violet threw her backpack over her shoulder, and shot a glance towards Louis. “Fuck, Ms. Martin is gonna be so pissed.”

       "I’ll write you a pass. Don’t worry about it.“ Mr. Everett pulled a notepad out of his pocket and took the pen that was perched on Clementine’s ear. "Just.. try to make sure he actually gets there.” Mr. Everett gestured to Louis, who gave a mock gasp at the implication.

“Will do,” Violet promised, grabbing Louis by the neck of his coat. “I’ll uh.. see you two tomorrow night.”

      “You’re coming?” Clem squealed, her eyes giving away how happy she was. Violet nodded sheepishly, looking back at Mr. Everett before dragging Louis out of the classroom.

“I like that girl,” Lee stated, capitalizing on the blush that had taken over Clem’s cheeks. “Reminds me of someone.”

     Clementine rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, tapping her foot impatiently as he made up a pass for her. “That’s good…”

Lee tore off the front page of the notepad, and held it high before giving it to Clem. “You have my blessing.”

Clementine’s flustered state turned into a fit of anger, as she jumped up to try and grab the pass out of his hand. “Shut. Up.” Clem grabbed onto the slip, wrenching it out of his arm. “I introduce you as my Cool Dad and this is how you repay me?”

      Lee chuckled, putting the pen back behind her ear. “If you think I’m bad, just wait ‘til Carley sees her.. Oh, boy.. Her cheeks are gonna be red from all that pinching.”

Clementine huffed and stomped out of the classroom, putting all of her weight onto her prosthetic foot, so it noisily clattered. She kept up the noise until she knew she was out of ear shot, and smiled to herself, bunching the bottom of her sweatshirt up in her hands.

          Her seventeenth birthday was going to be perfect.

#twdg #the walking dead game #twdg violet #twdg clementine #twdg louis #twdg aasim #twdg ruby #twdg brody #twdg spoilers #twdg s4 #clementine x violet #violet x clementine #violetine #violentine

[reesewestonarchive]

chapter eight / rem belongs to @forlornraven / masterpost / mature content

“…where would you go?”

Rem’s voice is a stark difference from the mixtape playing through frankensteined speakers from Rem’s Walkman. Nakoa opens his eyes, peers at Rem’s face—calm, pleased. “Hm?”

Rem dozes on his side of the bed, a hand out between them in an aborted attempt at touching Nakoa’s stomach. His words are slurred, though, and there’s a tired, distant look in his eye when he lifts his gaze to Nakoa.

Not a second later, his eyes are closed again. “If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?”

Loaded question. Nakoa thinks there are plenty of places he’d like to see, plenty of places he could live, but would any of it matter if Rem weren’t with him? “Dunno. Hawaii. Or… European countryside, maybe.” Or Russia, if it weren’t so fucking cold. That’s the thing about the midwest that Nakoa doesn’t miss—the fucking winters. “Some place warm, probably.”

“Bahamas,” Rem says. “You’re miserable when you’re cold.”

“I have bad circulation,” Nakoa says, staring at the ceiling. “Can’t help it.”

Rem lifts his hand, pinches the skin at Nakoa’s hips gently, and says, “‘Cause you’re so fucking skinny. I bruise you when we fuck.”

“You’re one to talk.” Nakoa draws his fingers across thumb-shaped bruises along his own hips. A gentle stir of desire blooms in his stomach—maybe he can give Rem a matching set later. “What about you?”

“What about me?” He burrows closer, presses his head against Nakoa’s neck. He sighs.

“Where would you go, if you could go anywhere?”

“What’s wrong with right here?” Rem drops an arm around Nakoa’s waist. “Mm. Maybe…” He sighs; his breath tickles Nakoa’s chest. He mumbles a response, but Nakoa doesn’t hear it, doesn’t ask for him to repeat it.

Instead, he hums along to Rem’s mixtape. Rem didn’t say it, and Nakoa’s not sure if it’s on purpose, but Nakoa’s since sussed out that the songs are love songs.

For a guy that can’t verbalize the word, Rem’s really fucking good at saying it.

There are plenty of unanswered questions—if anyone’s chasing them, if it’s Michael or Rem’s bad decisions. If it’s… something else. Some asshole on their tail for being as open. Nakoa knows the attitude, knows whatever this is between them makes other people angry, disgusted.

He also doesn’t give a shit. Anyone’d be hard pressed to find someone Rem wouldn’t fight.

In the room, with Rem wrapped around him, basking in the glow of sex, Nakoa forgets about all that. Forgets that there’s a world outside the motel, a world outside of Rem and himself and the bed they’re lying on, in the dark with The Cure playing softly in the background.

Nakoa tests the words on his lips again; soft, against Rem’s hair. I love you. He mouths along with the lyrics for a verse, then hums. Rem curls closer, a pleased noise escaping his throat.

A whisper when Nakoa says, “I love you,” his voice barely louder than the music. Rem says nothing, his breathing even in sleep.

Nakoa lets him rest.

-

In the cold, misty morning, they pack up from the hotel overlooking the ocean, and Rem uses the last of his own money on a pack of cigarettes. Nakoa steals one from Rem’s lips, ignores his squawk of disagreement, and says, “Where to?”

Rem sighs, stares down at the map. “Fuck if I know.”

Nakoa remembers his mother—tries not to; the thought of her still at home leaves his chest tight—and how she would always say that the journey means as much as the destination. They don’t have the money to go much farther, and soon, the midwest is going to be covered in snow. Soon enough, anyway.

Nakoa thinks of the Grand Canyon, of Yellowstone, of Niagara Falls. Of ghost towns and abandoned houses, amusement parks and mountains and the Atlantic Coast. He thinks he’d follow Rem to hell—if he asked.

“Might as well hit all the stops,” Rem says. “Right?”

Nakoa watches his brow crease in thought. He doesn’t want to, but he says, “Pretty soon we won’t have money for food. Eating out’s fucking expensive.”

A glint sparkles in Rem’s eyes as he pulls the cigarette from his lips, smoke exhaling with each word, “That’s not true. I eat you out all the time.”

“Mm. Think you’re pretty fucking clever, don’t you?”

Rem shrugs, tugs Nakoa against him by his belt loops. “Sometimes. Hey—about the money thing.” He raises an eyebrow, grin wide across his lips, and says, “We could rob a bank.”

Yeah, right. Nakoa has a difficult time imagining that. “Or scare small children.” He shoves his knuckles against Rem’s ribs. “Give me your lunch money, punk.”

Thoughtfully, Rem asks, “Ever thought about porn?”

Nakoa doesn’t say the only person he wants to fuck is Rem. Instead, he says, “With your jealous streak, yeah fucking right.”

Rem scowls, but there’s a layer of mischief underneath. “I don’t get jealous.”

“Yeah?” Nakoa licks his lips, then says, “All right, cool. I’ll go get dicked down by some big fucker with a selfish attitude to match yours.” He makes a show of peering around the parking lot. “What kind of job do you think I can get around here? Or is that something I need to go to Portland for?”

Rem makes a noise in his throat, tugs Nakoa back against him, grips Nakoa’s wrists in his own. “Fuck no. You’re—” He sighs. “Fine. You win.”

“Oh, yeah? What’d I win?”

“I’d offer myself up as prize, if I was worth anything.” He squints, plucks Nakoa’s sunglasses from atop Nakoa’s head, and puts them on. Nakoa almost days, “Don’t sell yourself short,” but Rem continues with, “Blowjob?”

“Tsk,” Nakoa says. “Like I don’t get those from you on the regular anyway.” He smiles, lopsided and pleased. “What else you got for me?”

But Rem’s attention has shifted, from Nakoa to something across the street. His skin is white, fear-lined, and there’s a  Nakoa frowns, tries to turn back to see it, but Rem’s grip is tight and he won’t let Nakoa move.

“Could—” Rem clears his throat, looks back at Nakoa and smiles. “—let’s get on the road, hey?”

He still doesn’t let Nakoa turn back to see what he was looking at, holds Nakoa’s hands together.

“What aren’t you telling me?” Nakoa asks. He shakes out of Rem’s grip, turns, and— “Oh, fuck—”

He can’t get to the van quick enough. Rem, somehow, is already inside when Nakoa finally shuts the door behind him. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t know!” Rem jams the key into the ignition, turns it—the van stalls. “Fuck!”

His heart beats, hard, fast, in his chest. “Rem,” Nakoa says, still staring at the old, beat-up Bronco sitting across the street, at the guy sitting outside of it.

Michael.

“How’d he find us?” Rem mutters. “I didn’t think—”

The van roars to life—for a split second before stalling again. Nakoa’s heart climbs his throat, and he feels like he’s going to throw up.

But the van’s not starting, and Michael’s moving forward, now, towards the car. Nakoa moves through the van, out through the back. “I’ll find you,” Nakoa says, “later, okay? Just—I’ll find you. When we lose him—”

And he goes. Out the back door, and he books it, as soon as he hits the asphalt. Rem yells his name, but Nakoa goes anyway, down the parking lot and through the alley towards the boardwalk, where maybe, fucking maybe, he can get away.

He hopes, stupidly, that Michael doesn’t go after Rem instead, that he follows Nakoa. Rem’s already in too deep into Nakoa’s bullshit, and—

Someone stands at the end of the alleyway, blocking his escape, so he turns back around, stumbles over his own feet into one of the buildings. Breath catches in his chest, terror holding him tight as he stares ahead, at Rem, held in his father’s grip.

“You leave a messy trail, Nakoa.” Michael’s voice is quiet, calm, and Nakoa hears footsteps behind him, encroaching on his space, unsurprised when he feels the cold metal of a gun press against his neck. “Nice to see you again.”

“Let him—” Nakoa says, but the gun presses against his neck, harder, cuts him off, and he swallows. Waits.

“Rude to interrupt your father.” Michael, after a beat, does release Rem—only to send him reeling against the brick with a fist to his stomach. “Tell me, Nakoa. Did you think I would let you leave?”

Nakoa says nothing, eyes trained on Rem. Michael sighs, and, as Rem is bent over, coughing, knees him in the stomach. This time, Rem goes down. “Answer me.”

Yes; Nakoa figured, it’s been long enough since he heard about the secrets, since he’s been involved in any of Michael’s work; he should have been safe. He should have been fucking safe. And if it weren’t for Michael knowing someone fucking everywhere, a network of I-know-a-guy, Nakoa would have been.

He should have convinced Rem to fly out of the country. Maybe remote Russia isn’t so bad.

“No,” he lies, because Michael shouldn’t want to waste resources, not time or money, on Nakoa. He steps forward, ignoring Rem behind him, coughing.

Michael’s taller than he is, though not by much; Nakoa slouches. Rem still towers over him.

Rem could take him, if he was smart about it.

“I thought I was clear,” Michael says. “You are to stay with me. This is what we do, Nakoa. I can’t have my only son disappear, after all, can I? Even if he is a miserable excuse for one.”

Rem stumbles to his feet, croaks out a, “Hey, asshole—” before Michael turns, gun still in hand, and Nakoa can’t turn away fast enough, waiting for the sound of a gunshot that doesn’t come.

Instead, Michael winds up and slams the butt of the pistol into Rem’s head, turning back before Rem has even hit the ground. Blood surfaces from A gas on Rem’s forehead immediately, runs down his face, and… 

Nakoa watches Rem, tunnel visioned. Is he okay. Is he okay there’s a lot of blood already and his chest is rising and falling but is it too much? Not enough—

“Can someone take that one back to the car,” Michael asks, “handcuff him and put him in the trunk?”

It’s not a request. But Nakoa still says, “He needs help. You—”

“Shut up.”

“He could be—”

“Easier if he is,” Michael says. “I’d rather not have to cut off his attempts at a Disney rescue. You are mine, you know. No other man you throw yourself will change that fact.” Michael pulls Nakoa’s chin up, forces him to look Michael in the eye. “It’s best for you at home. You keep poor company.”

Nakoa keeps poor company. That’s almost laughable. “Pot calling the kettle,” Nakoa says. “I promise I won’t say shit, okay? For fuck’s sake, Rem doesn’t even know.”

He wonders maybe if Michael knows that, or if he doesn’t care. If his sole concern is of Nakoa giving out pieces of Michael’s secrets, or if it’s…

Nakoa swallows. Waits. 

Michael stares at him, expression blank, before he says, “You know, Nakoa. You haven’t proven yourself very trustworthy. You ran away from home. What am I meant to think?” He steps forward. “No. I think it’s best for you to stay with me.” He glances back towards Rem, still unconscious on the ground. “Your… friend, too.”

If Michael knows, he doesn’t day anything. Instead, he snaps his fingers, and the gun at Nakoa’s throat disappears. He tries to leave, get away, grab for Rem and shake him awake, but his before he can, his wrists are bound by zip ties.

Michael retreats down the alleyway, lighting a cigarette, and Nakoa opens his mouth—unsure what he’s going to say—but doesn’t get to call after him. Instead, there’s a burst of pain at the back of his skull, and the world goes dark.

#road to nowhere au #my writing

[tilltheendwilliwrite]

Qi Flows for Her

Chapter Five

Previous Chapter

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC x Bucky Barnes  |  Word Count: 5112 Warnings: Language, angst

Celine made sure she was last onto the jet where she took Bucky’s previous seat in the back, darkened corner, as far away from the others as she could get. She snapped the hair band wrapped around her wrist, using the physical pain to remind herself to breathe. Her hair hung forward, hiding her face. Back to the straight, dark brown of before, she listened as they murmured about the rest of what they found and looked after Peter who had been knocked out for his own good.

God… that had hurt like rejection hadn’t hurt in years.

Hunched over, she leaned her face against the wall, the metal cool against her skin. A tear worked its way down her cheek. She’d known this was going to happen, had been saying so since the beginning. Yet, she’d still chanced to hope this time would be different. This time someone would see her for who she truly was and not react with fear.

Why do I bother to hope? She snapped the elastic at her wrist again.

“Celine…” The whisper of Charles' voice only made her flinch.

“Go away, Charles…”

“Darling, I can feel your pain.”

“Pain you have a part in instigating. Go away, Charles!”

“Celine… please…”

She sighed. “What did you expect? That I’d come here, reveal myself, and everything would be tea and crumpets? Go… the fuck… away!” She gave a mighty push and slammed her shields closed.

Her inner demons were relentless after. The voices of hate and disgust hissed and wailed in her head. The self-loathing caused her to wrap her hands around her middle. She was an abomination. A freak. A thing to be feared and despised. No one wanted her. No one would care if she just walked away.

Disappeared.

Died.

The phone in her pocket vibrated.

She ignored it.

It continued to go off for the next fifteen minutes straight, becoming an annoying vibration against her thigh until she finally dug it free. “What?” she sighed, expecting Charles.

“Little girl, next time you pick the fuckin’ phone up on the first ring!” The snarling voice of Logan had her lip twitching.

“Yes, papa,” she sassed.

“What the fuck happened, Celine?” he demanded.

Sighing, she glanced through her hair at the others speaking quietly away from her. “Can’t, Logan. Not now.”

“You’re on the plane?”

“Yeah.”

“Did they hurt you?” he snarled.

“No.”

“Not physically, you mean. Dammit, Charles! I told you sending her was a bad idea!”

It almost made her smile. The Wolverine was highly protective of those he called family. “I’m a big girl, Logan,” she murmured. “I tie my own shoes and everything. I’ll be fine.”

He huffed a dismissive bark of sound. “You ain’t fine! I can tell you ain’t fine! Do I need to come kick around a few super soldiers again? Cause I fuckin’ will!”

“The way I heard it, it sounded like a draw, though Steve said you’re a heavy son of a gun.”

“He’s one to talk,” Logan grumbled.

Leaning her head back against the wall, Celine smiled slightly. “Put up a bit of a fight, did he?”

He snorted. “Decent enough.”

“Good. You were getting full of yourself again.”

“Tricky little witch,” he scoffed. Silence descended for a few seconds before he murmured, “Celine… you can come home. I can replace you if you want.”

She wiped the tear from her cheek. “Nope. Charles sent me. I’m staying until they kick me out.” No matter how much it hurt.

“Look, if you’re doing this to punish Charles cause you’re pissed, then don’t. He’s already hurt you shut him out.”

This time she snorted. “He deserved it.”

“Yeah, probably,” he chuckled. “Take care of yourself, darlin’. And if you need me?”

“I’ll let you know, Logan. Tell Rogue I miss her.”

He grunted just before the line going dead.

She stuffed the phone back in her pocket and returned to her silent reflection, feeling only slightly better.

When the jet landed what felt like hours later, she was down the ramp and into the tower as if the hounds of hell were nipping her heels. To her mind, it wasn't far from the truth.

***

Steve and Bucky watched her go, neither knowing how to fix what they’d wrought.

Peter was alright, the bullet nothing more than a flesh wound, but the way the boy had reacted to her… they’d quite literally watched her heart break.

She was far more powerful than they’d realized. So much so, she’d plucked a soldier off the mountain and ate him before throwing something, likely his soul, into... hell? The underworld? Somewhere else? They had no idea.

Were they a little disconcerted? Sure. Who wouldn’t the hell be? But were they scared of her? No. The shock had kept them mute though, something they now realized had done a lot of harm.

She’d sat, huddled and silent in the corner, gradually curling in on herself, getting smaller with each passing moment until her phone had rung.

Steve had been about to go over and force her to answer when she’d finally dug it free on her own.

The irate voice of Logan was one he’d never forget, and he’d exchanged an eye roll with Bucky. He was a gruff son of a gun, but intensely loyal and protective, especially of Charles. Clearly, that protection extended to Celine.

Logan’s accusation, the comment about hurting her, had caused both of them to stiffen in offence. Her denial and his rewording had jabbed them both firmly with guilt.

Logan was right. They hadn’t hurt her physically. Emotionally? In her heart?

Yes.

“Shit,” Steve hissed softly once the others had exited.

“More like fuck, punk. We screwed up.” Bucky sighed, making his way toward Celine’s seat where he crouched down and swiped his fingers through the dark droplets on the floor. “She’s been bleeding.”

“What?” Steve jolted, coming quickly to Buck’s side.

“Yeah. We should check on her.”

“Pretty sure she doesn’t want to see us, pal.”

“So? We fucked up. We should fix it before it gets worse.” Bucky got to his feet and headed for the doors.

They walked in silence, both feeling intensely guilty.

She'd done some incredible things tonight, but they hadn’t told her so. Had her force been a little excessive? Sure, but seeing Peter take a bullet had Steve longing to hit the asshole sniper with his shield, so he understood how upset Celine must have been.

When Natasha stepped into the corridor, blocking them from getting on the elevator,  Steve heard Bucky sigh and tried not to echo it.

“Need something, Nat?” Steve asked.

“I hope you get it now. You'll send her on her way?”

Steve frowned and shook his head. “Why? Celine’s part of this team.”

“Really!” she snapped. “After seeing what she did? What she is?”

“What I saw was a powerful woman who was treated like a freak tonight by her own team. Me included. She's still a person. Still Celine. Her powers don't make her anything different.”

“Shit! You've got a hard-on for her too! I knew Barnes was balls deep, but I expected better of you, Cap.”

Bucky’s hand wrapped around her throat and slammed her into the wall. “You're pushing the line, Natalia,” he snarled softly. “Celine may be Styx, she may be ridiculously powerful, but she's bruised, broken, and your snide comments aren't doing anyone any good!”

“She’ll destroy this team!”

“You said the same thing of me when Steve brought me in. The ghost. The Winter Soldier. The HYDRA weapon. Fuck you, Nat! She's no different!”

She blinked at him, stunned. “She's completely different! Did you not watch her kill a man tonight by eating his life force? Was that simply my imagination?”

“And I kill people with a gun or a knife. So what?”

“You're not about to take us all out in our sleep!”

“But I could if I wanted to!” he roared. “So could you, goddamnit, but you don't see any of us trying to shove you out the door!”

Laying a hand on Bucky’s shoulder, Steve urged his friend to let Natasha go. Once he had, Steve rounded on her himself. “You've taken issue with Celine since the moment she arrived. What's the beef, Nat? What's the real problem here?”

“This is the real issue! You're both so blinded by the hot new piece of ass; you can't see the danger she presents.”

“And me, Natasha? Am I also blinded by a hot piece of ass?” Wanda asked, appearing behind them. She looked at him, and Steve felt a clutch around his heart. The red wash of power in her eyes showed how disconcerted she was feeling. “But then, I am also one to be feared, to be treated like a freak. To be caged and collared because of what I am. What Hydra made me.”

“Wanda, no… I…” Natasha shook her head. “You're different.”

“How?” she asked coming closer. “I use similar powers. I can kill nearly as easily. You also locked me up to keep me away from people because I was a danger to society. Because you didn't trust me. Celine has shown me nothing but kindness after I have proved myself untrustworthy three times,” her voice rasped with self-hatred. “I keep telling myself, I cannot control other people's fear, only my own. Tonight… I failed at both.”

She walked away, and Steve's heart cracked. It appeared many of them were regretting what happened tonight.

“Celine is part of this team. She stays part of this team,” Steve said with finality.

“Fine. But my working with her comes as a last resort. I don't trust her to have my back.” Nat spun and headed away from where Wanda had gone.

Bucky waited only until she was out of earshot before muttering, “I'm not sure I trust you'll have hers.”

“Buck,” Steve sighed.

“I ain't ever seen her like this, Steve. She's been confrontational and just…”

“Nasty,” Sam muttered, wandering down the hall. “I'll go talk to her.”

“You alright with what happened tonight?” Steve asked.

“Alright?” He took a deep breath, eyes widening as he shrugged. “Not sure I’d say alright. Am I gonna throw a hissy fit? Nah. I kinda think Scott’s got the right idea. Better with us than against us.” He patted Steve's shoulder. “Am I gonna think twice about pissing her off? Hell yeah!” Chuckling, Sam continued on after Natasha.

“That's four,” Bucky murmured, a smirk twitching his lip. “Let's go poke the bear, see if she'll forgive us.”

“I think you mean the dragon. Damn that was cool,” Steve grinned.

“Now you sound like Parker.” Bucky’s face fell as they got on the elevator. “You think the kid will come round?”

Steve sighed. “Hope so.”

She’d been so happy spending time with Peter. Having the kid look at her in fear had just killed her.

When they stepped off the elevator, they had the answer hit them full force.

“Celine! Please!” Peter was standing outside her room, one hand pressed to his ribs, the other banging on her door. “I'm sorry! Let me explain!”

“Peter? Shouldn't you be in the med wing?” Steve asked sternly.

The kid shook his head. “Not until I apologize. Not until I tell her how sorry…” Pain took his breath, not all of it physical.

“Okay, kid.” Taking Peter by the elbow, Steve held him up. “How long you been here?” he asked.

Seeing as how the kid was still in his suit, he doubted Parker had even been to see Bruce, or if he had, the kid had snuck out.

“A while,” Peter mumbled.

“And she hasn't answered?”

Peter shook his head.

“FRIDAY located Celine.”

“Celine is on the roof. Captain? It appears she's is quite distraught. She is standing on the roof ledge.”

“What?!” Three voices bellowed before all of them scrambled for the elevator. It took them to the glassed-in common room where they barreled out the door to hit the exterior stairs which would take them to the roof.

Steve grabbed Peter's shoulder. “Are you alright to go around? If something goes sideways…” He didn't need to say Peter was the only one capable of catching Celine.

“I'm good, Cap!” Peter turned to go.

Steve dragged him back. “You stay out of sight. Let us talk to her before you do anything; you get me?”

“Yes, sir!” Peter nodded.

“Go.” He gave the kid a small shove and sprinted up the stairs after Bucky. His heart stuttered when she came into view.

Hair blowing back in the wind, balanced on the balls of her feet, she stood, hands relaxed at her sides, staring out over the city.

“Celine?” Bucky called quietly.

“Doll, you want to come down from there?” Steve asked, both of them edging closer.

Her head turned only enough to show them her profile. The tear streaks were impossible to miss. “Not particularly, Captain. I like the view.”

“Sweetheart, we'd really like it if you came down from there,” Bucky muttered, moving slowly forward.

“I am not your sweetheart, Sergeant. I am not your doll, your baby, your darlin’. I am Celine. I am… a vampire. I am Styx. And I am always to be feared.” She turned to walk the narrow edge of the building.

“Celine, please come down.” Steve would beg if he had to.

She paused, looked at him, and sighed. “You believe I do this, walk this ledge because I wish to hurt myself?” A snort of derision escaped her. “I wish to clear my mind, nothing more.” She turned back to face the city, turning her back on them. “I have no wish for company, especially from those who see me as something to be despised.”

Striding forward, Bucky reached for her arm only to have her dance out of his reach. “Celine!”

“What, Sergeant? Are you here to look at me with fear again? Are you going to tell me to leave? Explain how I am too much a freak to be part of the Avengers?” Night seemed to flow into her, swirl around her. It darkened her hair and brightened her eyes. She stepped backward, crouched, and snarled like an angry animal. “Then you tell me now to go, and I will pack my things!”

“No, Celine,” Steve said, holding up his hands. He approached with caution like he would a wounded creature. “Yes, you surprised us with what you did, maybe even spooked us at first, but we're not afraid of you.”

“Yes, you were!” she almost howled. “And after you said…” She shook her head. “I knew you would fear me. Everyone fears me. I should never have hoped for anything different.”

The words were so soft they could barely hear them, but they hit harder than the Hulk.

Bucky walked toward her, hands raised. “Read me, my aura, my emotions. I’m not afraid of you, Celine. Steve’s not afraid. Sam’s not afraid. Peter isn’t afraid. Wanda isn’t afraid. Come down. Talk to us. Let us show you.” He held out his hand.

“No… no, you lie!” She gave a violent shake of her head. “I won't look! I won't! I can't take anymore! Why are you so cruel?”

Peter landed on the ledge a few feet away. “Celine, I am so sorry.”

She whipped to face him, and Bucky lunged.

His arms closed around her, dragged her from the edge and back to the center of the roof. Expecting a struggle, he held her tightly, but she only sagged, eyes wide and staring at Peter.

The curl smoothed from her hair, the colour lightened. Her eyes lost their glow, and her face fell. Instead of struggling, she turned into Bucky, turned away from Peter, as a distressed cry escaped her lips.

“No, no… you were afraid. I made you afraid. You wouldn’t… let me help…” she moaned, clinging to Bucky.

This time it was the devastation on Peter’s face which broke Steve’s heart. “Celine, doll face Peter’s sorry. He, like us, didn’t mean to hurt you. But you were pretty impressive tonight. More than we’d expected. Read us. See for yourself. It's not a joke.”

“Promise,” Bucky murmured and stroked her arm. “No one's gonna be cruel, darlin’. Give us a chance.”

She bit her lip and looked between the two of them. Such pain shadowed her eyes Steve's heart felt like it tore open for her and whatever trauma had forced her to this point, to where she felt the need to wall herself off from everyone.

A moment passed before her amber eyes filled with relief and she sagged against Bucky. “Oh…” the word flew free on a heavy exhale.

“Can you forgive us, baby?” Steve threaded his fingers through her hair, gently pulling her head back so he could see her eyes.

They were wet, as was her face, so he wiped her cheeks dry. A breath shuddered from her, and she gave a slow nod. She looked as shocked, possibly as stunned as he and Bucky had been when she’d thrown a dragon into the sky and plucked a man off the mountain.

“I thought your dragon was incredible, Celine,” Steve said softly.

“And the way you dealt with the guards on the gate, and the people at the warehouse… amazing,” Bucky smiled.

“You were really spectacular, Celine. I'm… sorry I hurt your feelings,” said Peter, coming closer. “You did… kinda startle me, what with you havin’ just, like, eaten a dude. I promise it won't make me spaz out on you next time.”

“Peter,” she whispered, hands tight to her chest.

“Hug?” he asked, holding out the one arm. The other remaining pressed to his wound.

Bucky let her go, but Celine was hesitant to reach out until Parker gave an exasperated sigh and simply dragged her in via a shot of webbing and hugged her.

“You wanna fix me now?” Peter asked. “That is if it's still okay?”

She nodded a small jerk of her head before placing her green glowing fingers on his side.

His eyes widened in surprise when the pain disappeared. “Wow. Celine, you're so awesome!” He laughed as he lifted her off her feet and swung her around.

“Peter!” she squealed in surprise.

Chuckling, he dropped her to her feet and hugged her tight with both arms. “Thanks, doll,” he drawled, bussing her a kiss to the cheek - bold little shit-eating grin on his face - and darted away. “I'll check-in with Bruce. See ya tomorrow!”

She pressed her fingers to her cheek, eyes full of tears, but a smile was twitching her lips. Turning to face them, her smile broke free. “You people are so messed up.”

Bucky grinned while Steve laughed.

“Maybe it's your previous fri-uh-colleagues who were messed up,” Steve said with a sheepish grin.

“Yeah, darlin’,” Bucky smirked, “You just needed a couple’a old guys and a kid to see you for who you really are.”

“Speak for yourself, pal. I ain't old,” Steve snorted.

“Maybe being in the ice that long just froze your self-preservation brain cells,” Celine quipped.

“Then what's Peter’s excuse?” Bucky asked.

“Young and foolish,” she scoffed. “He doesn't know any better.”

Steve shook his head and held out his hand. “C’mon. You were bleeding on the jet. Let’s see it.”

She arched a brow in wry condemnation. “After the last few days, do you honestly think I cannot fix myself?”

He arched one in return, shook his hand and said, “Just give!” It was a fair imitation of what she’d done the day they’d met, causing Bucky to burst out laughing.

Rolling her eyes, Celine stalked forward to hold her hand out palm up. “There, you see? Perfectly fine.”

Steve frowned as he traced his fingers over her palm. “What did you…” he started to ask when it dawned on him what she’d likely done to herself. “Celine…” Heart hurting, guilt filled him for what she’d gone through, those talons of hers digging into her flesh with her anguish. “I am sorry.”

Her eyes softened. “I know, Steve.”

Bucky collected her opposite hand, sighing quietly as he stared at her unmarked flesh. “I promised you I wouldn’t feel any differently and at the first opportunity to prove it, I fucked it up.”

She gave her own sigh, released their hands, and patted both chests. “You are good men, but you are only human. I am,” she shook her head and turned away, “not.”

Steve went after her, grabbing her by the elbow to drag her back against his chest. “You are as human as the two of us. Powerful you may be, but you’re still human, Celine.”

Her eyes brightened, and her hair curled. “I am not. Human’s do not feed off other humans.”

“Your mutation only makes you different, Celine. It doesn’t make you less human.” Bucky’s hand curled around the back of her neck.

Trapped between the two of them again, Steve couldn’t help but notice the heat she radiated like a furnace. People always commented on how hot he or Bucky ran, but Celine seemed to nearly double their temperature. Cupping her chin, he tilted her face up, so her diamond-bright eyes shone for him to see. “You aren’t a freak. You’re an Avenger. We’re all a little… abnormal.” He couldn’t understand how she could’ve grown up in a place like Xavier’s school and view herself so differently from the other mutants. If anything, it should have been a place she fit into fairly well.

“I believe I’m a lot abnormal, Steve,” she chuckled, the curl of her hair growing more prominent as her eyes drifted down to his lips.

Bucky’s hand went from her nape to her throat, pressing up beneath Steve’s to tilt her head back onto his shoulder. “You ain’t the one with the vibranium arm,” he said, smirk growing.

Her eyes watched his lips as well before her tongue darted out, moistening hers.

Steve had never wanted to kiss a woman as badly as he did Celine in that instant. The desire he was trying to contain roared into life.

It sent her eyes darting back to his. They blazed bright, burned into him, filled with distress and sent her jerking away from them both. “Sorry! Sorry. That’s my bad… ha, I should go.” She darted away, down the stairs before either of them could move to stop her.

Groaning, Steve thrust his hand through his hair. “Fuck!”

“No shit,” Bucky muttered, trying to adjust his pants without being overly obvious.

“What the hell keeps happening here?” Steve grumbled.

Sighing, Bucky shook his head. “I don’t know, punk, but…” a wash of red filled his cheeks, “I… kind of like it.”

“What?” he gasped, jerking his head up to look at Bucky.

The metal-armed soldier shrugged. “Feels… good having her between us. I don’t know. She just… fits.”

“Bucky…” Steve shook his head.

“I know, I know. Can’t seduce a recruit,” he huffed. “But Steve, you can’t tell me you don’t feel it. We ain’t talked about it, keep pushin’ it to the side, but we can’t fight what we’re feeling.”

“She won’t even be a friend, Buck. Besides, you just watched her rabbit when she got a hint of something off me. I’m not going to put that pressure on Celine.” Steve stalked toward the stairs. “I don’t even know what the hell is happening! Every time it's just us, you, me, her, it’s….”

“Intense sexual heat?” Bucky chuckled.

“Laugh it up, jackass,” Steve grumbled.

“I’m serious!” he scoffed. Grabbing Steve’s arm, Bucky forced him to stop. “I’m asking this in all seriousness, if she chose me over you, would you be okay with it?”

“Bucky… I… Why are you even going there?”

“It’s a hypothetical, Steve. Just answer the fucking question.”

“I’d have to be, wouldn’t I?”

“But you’d hate it, right?”

Jerking his arm away, Steve snapped, “Yes, damn it! I’d hate it!” and stormed down the stairs.

Bucky simply jumped over the rail to land in front of him. “I’d be the same way!”

Coming to a stop, Steve’s eyes closed in pain. “I know, Buck. I can’t be your rival. I won’t be. I don’t have it in me to go against you, and you know it.”

“Stevie.” Bucky’s hands closed over his shoulders, gripped tight, shook him a little. “You think I could?”

When he looked up, Bucky’s eyes were bright with emotion. The smack which came to Steve’s cheek was anything but light, yet it was full of affection, even as it stung something fierce.  

“You’re my brother, Steve. I wouldn’t ever do that to you. I love you, pal, and we’ve been through too much hell to fight over a girl, even a dame as amazing as Celine. Whatever comes, we’ll figure it out. Besides, she’s skittish as a baby deer,” he sighed. “Doubt it will go anywhere for either of us.”

Both sighed unhappily and continued inside.

***

A little panicked, Celine made her way back to her room, thankful she avoided seeing anyone else. Riding in the elevator, she allowed herself a small amount of hysterical laughter for, sure enough, she’d found herself sandwiched happily - and hornily - between the two soldiers again. Her nature had taken over thanks to her overactive libido, and she’d drawn them in.

And it had felt… good. Too good.

The spike in Steve’s chi had nearly made her moan and beg for a taste. The Captain was potent!

Bucky, too, though slightly more in control, his arousal had shivered through her. It was subtle, like the nip in the air which preceded a snowstorm but it was still delectable.

So intent was she on the near taste she’d had, something she really should be berating herself for, Celine did not notice the aura waiting in her room until her hand was on the doorknob. Steeling her spine, she slowly pushed her door inward.

The lights were on, the one sitting on her couch doing nothing to hide her presence. Natasha smirked smugly at her.

“I do not remember inviting you to my room,” Celine said cautiously, remaining in the doorway.

“You didn’t. Come in, shut the door, and sit down.”

Brow arching, Celine snorted. “I think I will stay where I am.”

Anger flared in her aura before Natasha smoothed it away. “I think… Adeline, you will want to do what I say.”

The use of her real name was so rare, Celine momentarily froze. Closing the door, she moved toward Natasha, growing angrier by the second. “So, you have found my birth name. What of it?”

Picking up a tablet, Nat read, “Born Adeline Evans to one Tammy Evans, drug addict junky, and alcoholic absentee father, Marcus Evans. Ran away from home at thirteen, wanted for questioning in the death of one Franklin Delacore after he was found dead on the floor of your bedroom.”

She refused to flinch, only sat in an armchair and crossed her legs. There was nothing there. Charles had seen to the reports, the heart attack the man had had was ruled as an accident. Her mother’s drugged up ravings were nothing more than the ramblings of a woman out of her mind.

“Lived on the street, it seems from the age of thirteen until fifteen.” Here Nat looked up. “Wouldn’t it be interesting if the police were informed of the mutant Styx whose MO perfectly fits the two cold cases they have from way back when Adeline was a teenage runaway.”

“What do you want, Natasha?” Celine asked, without a hint any of what she’d said had been true.

“Oh, I’m not done yet,” she fairly purred. “There’s also the information about poor Thomas and Jacob. Nasty business that. It really would be a travesty if the new team found out what you’d done to your old team. To your friends.”

“What do you want, Natasha?” Celine asked a second time.

“What I want is for you to leave and never come back, but we can’t always get what we want, so how about what I need?”

Tired of these games, Celine snapped, “Just spit it out, Widow!” Hair curling, nails lengthening, she dug her talons into the cushioned arms of her chair.

Natasha stiffened her entire countenance sharpening. “I’ve safeguards in place, Styx, so think twice about hurting me. Anything happens to me here, or on a mission, you're a part of… all this information goes public.” She smiled, a predatory baring of teeth. “It would be a pity if the Professor's involvement in all your messes came to light.”

The cold weight of fear wrapped around Celine’s heart. “Get to the point, Natasha.”

“I see how you look at them you know. Steve and Bucky. They’re too blinded by the pretty girl to see the monster you really are. You're going to stay away from them; you're going to stay away from all my friends. You'll limit your involvement with the team outside of missions.” She got slowly to her feet, triumph and bravado coating her innate fear of what Celine was. “Isolate yourself, Celine, or I'll do it for you. Permanently.” Striding toward the door, Natasha dropped the tablet in Celine’s lap, the faces of Jacob and Thomas staring up at her from the screen.

Celine spoke softly, “Be careful, Widow. What you try so hard to protect… may not take kindly to your methods.”

“You’ll never tell them. You try so hard to be human, fit in, but you're a monster. I know it. You know it. If they knew what you'd done….” Natasha let the words hang as she shut the door and walked away.

Celine stared down at her lap and lightly touched first one and then the other face.

Natasha may have found the information on the boys, she may know some of Charles involvement, she suspected the Widow had likely bugged her room, but Natasha didn't know everything. She couldn't for there were no records of what Celine was beyond the mental knowledge shared by four people.

But the two smiling faces on the tablet in her lap, the one lost and the one…. She couldn't bear to think about it. The pain it caused was simply too great.

She placed her hand flat on the screen and ignored the tears which fell down her face as she cried for things she could never make right, and for the life she might have possibly had here.

Next Chapter

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