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mcntsee · 9 months

Text

Letters to her

prologue

summary: kaz’s letter to y/n throughout the years.

warnings: Kaz’s past is kinda mentioned, mentions of death, cursing

note: I tried to express kaz’s feelings and growth with every start and finish of all the letters, hopefully you guys understand it too. I added a little something at the end, hope you enjoy! <3333

first letter:

Deer y/n

My da said you can came come play wheneber you want to come play with my me again can you please come play with me soon pleas?

I miss you and Jordie miss and da and the little kitteny miss you we all misses you very much

Love Kaz!

(I drawed a pist picture of you and me and spots playing)

2nd letter

Dear Y/N,

I hope you're doing okay. I wanted to say a big thank you for being there when we said bye to my da. It made me feel better knowing you were there, even though it was kinda sad.

Guess what? Jordie said we're gonna move to Ketterdam. He says it's cause he wants me to go to a good school there. I'm not sure about leaving this house, but Jordie says it'll be good for us.

The cool part is that you live in Ketterdam! That means we can hang out more and play together. Remember when we used to build forts in the living room and pretend we were pirates? Maybe we can do that in Ketterdam too.

I'll miss this house a bit because it's where we played hide and seek and had ice cream parties, but I think Ketterdam will be fun too. And I'm really happy cause we'll get to see each other more often!

I will see you soon, okay?

Love, Kaz!

3rd letter

Dear y/n,

I'm really, really sorry I haven't come to see you yet. It's not 'cause I don't want to, I promise. You're still my bestest friend ever. It's just that things got a little crazy since we arrived.

Jordie met this guy named Jacob Hertzoon. And guess what? Jacob offered us a whole bunch of money for our house! Jordie said it's a really good thing 'cause we can use the money for important stuff. But it also means we're super busy.

I didn't want you to think I forgot about you or anything. I miss you a lot and I still want to see you and play together. Maybe once we're all settled in our new place and get the money, we can have a big adventure like we used to.

Thanks for being the best friend ever. I promise we'll hang out soon, okay?

Love, Kaz!

4th letter

Y/N,

Are you okay? Please write back! Jordie is gone. I need to know you're alive.

Kaz.

5th letter

Y/N,

I heard you went on quite the journey to Shu Han just to retrieve my cane. I assume the trip was bearable. Your efforts are appreciated.

It's curious how life unfolds, isn't it? One day we're children playing in the streets, the next we're scattered across the world for various reasons. Yet, here we are, still connected by some thread of familiarity.

I imagine you'll return from your expedition when the time is right. Until then, business with the dregs continues as usual. The city keeps turning, and so do its dealings. As for me, well, I have my own matters to attend to as soon as I’m able to walk again.

- K.B.

First note

Get well soon! Let me know if you need anything else.

- Love, Y/n!

6th letter

Y/N,

Your letter reached me, and I must admit, it contained more substance than I anticipated. Word travels fast in the Barrel, and it seems that Haskell has taken quite an interest in your recent endeavors. His words carry weight, though they seldom come without a price.

If his assessment holds true, and you manage to prove your worth in the upcoming job, it could indeed elevate you within the ranks. Haskell’s recognition of your potential is both promising and concerning. The higher one climbs, the more treacherous the fall can be.

In the midst of this, know that I await your return.

May you navigate these challenges with the same tenacity that has carried you thus far. I wish you the best of luck, Y/N. Tread carefully.

- K.B

7th letter

Y/N,

You certainly have a talent for uncovering promising recruits. Jesper Fahey. The word on the street is that he’s got a steady aim that’s worth noticing. The skills he possesses could indeed be valuable, particularly in the line of work we find ourselves engaged in.

However, I must tread cautiously when it comes to individuals entangled in debts and vices. Jesper Fahey, from what I’ve heard, is no stranger to gambling. His tendency to wager recklessly has garnered quite a reputation, one that isn’t entirely favorable. The loyalty of a man buried under the weight of debts is a precarious matter. Whether his skills can outweigh the burden of his choices remains to be seen.

Your perspective on recruits is valued, and I’ll certainly keep a watchful eye on Fahey. I trust your judgment, and I’m willing to entertain the possibility. In the midst of all this, remember that your return is anticipated and your presence missed.

Return safely,

K.B.

8th letter

Y/N,

Do you remember Jesper? It’s almost comical how, after discussing him in my last letter, fate seemed to conspire to validate our conversation. Not long after I sent those words to you, I found myself intervening to prevent Jesper from getting himself thoroughly thrashed due to his gambling debts.

I hope I’ve made the right call by extending a hand to Jesper. It’s a calculated risk, one that I’m hoping will pan out in our favor. There’s potential there, no doubt, but potential doesn’t always translate into reliability.

This letter is short, I know, but I will tell you more about it when you come back.

Stay safe,

K.B

9th letter

Y/n,

It’s been days since your last communication, and the weight of uncertainty presses heavily on me. The quiet absence of your presence has stirred an unease I’m not accustomed to.

I’ve seen you handle insane odds, and I know you’re more than capable. But here I am. My mind keeps wandering to places I’d rather it not go, imagining scenarios that could have unfolded, and none of them are sitting well with me.

I hope that this silence is a result of strategic detachment, that you’re immersed in the intricacies of the job and haven’t had a moment to spare for correspondence.

I’m not accustomed to this vulnerability, nor do I care for it. Yet, here I am, plagued by the absence of information. I ask you, if you’re able, to dispel this uncertainty. A simple message, a token of reassurance – anything to quell this rising tide of apprehension.

I await word from you with an intensity I hadn’t thought possible. May it come soon.

Expectantly,

K.B

10th letter

Y/N,

I received the coat you sent, and I must admit, it's a rare occasion when I'm at a loss for words. It's unlike anything I would've chosen for myself, yet somehow, it feels surprisingly fitting. I can't deny its utility either – I appreciate it.

Jesper and Nina have managed to cultivate a special talent for driving me to the brink of exasperation. Their camaraderie is both amusing and bewildering, a chaotic symphony that I'm still attempting to decipher.

Today was no different. Jesper's antics at the club bordered on audacious, and Nina's unbridled laughter was enough to turn heads in our direction. As I tried to navigate the sea of chaos they create, I found myself, unusually, yearning for a return to some semblance of normalcy.

I must confess, the prospect of your return holds an allure I hadn't anticipated. There's a steadiness in your presence, an understanding that's often a rare commodity in these tumultuous times. The chaos, the hustle – they feel more manageable when you're around.

Till then, I'll persevere in the sea of antics that Jesper and Nina stir up, counting down the days until your return.

Until then,

Kaz

11th letter

Y/N,

Your mention of the jurda parem caught my attention, no doubt about it. It’s a name that carries weight, and I’ve got a feeling we’re treading on some dangerous ground here. It’s the kind of thing that’s best left untouched until we’ve got a better handle on what it entails.

Listen, I won’t preach, but I’ve got to say it – be careful and keep an eye out for trouble. The city’s not known for being kind to those who don’t tread carefully, and I’d hate to see you caught in something you didn’t see coming.

I’ve got a job for you. One that’s right up your alley. It’s always better discussing these things face to face, so when you can, make your way back. The sooner, the better.

Until then,

Kaz

12th letter

Y/N,

I’ve never been one for words, as you well know. My tongue seems to have a mind of its own, often saying the wrong things at the wrong time. And when it comes to matters like these, I’ve found that my eloquence takes a swift exit.

So, here I am, writing this letter in hopes that the words come out right, that they somehow capture what I’m feeling. I’ve spent years navigating the intricacies of this city, and yet the complexities of my own emotions have managed to elude me.

I’ve always valued our connection, from those early days of childhood mischief to the present. You’ve been a constant in my life, someone whose presence brings a sense of order to the chaos that surrounds us. And somewhere along the way, that bond transformed into something deeper, something I’ve been grappling with.

I find myself wanting to say more, to articulate the thoughts that remain half-formed in my mind. But it’s difficult, Y/N, and this letter might be the best I can manage.

What I’m trying to say is that you’ve become more than a friend, more than a partner in crime. There’s a depth to my feelings that I’m only beginning to understand. And if I’m being truly honest, I’d like to explore where this path might lead.

I understand if you need time, if my sudden candor is a lot to process. But I wanted to put these thoughts down, to let you know where my heart is at. And if you’re open to it, if you’ve felt even a fraction of what I’ve been feeling, then maybe we can navigate this new terrain together.

Kaz.

Second note

I’d like to explore where this path might lead too.

Love, y/n!

13th letter

Y/N,

I can't thank you enough for stepping in when I couldn't. I hope the contractor in Lij wasn’t hard to handle.

Now, I have a proposal of a different kind. How about we put our skills to use in a more relaxed setting? I'd like to take you out to dinner. No heists, no secret dealings, just you and me, navigating the menu instead of the back alleys.

I've made reservations for us at a place that's a bit more reputable than the Barrel's taverns. Consider it a step toward normalcy, a chance to enjoy an evening without looking over our shoulders.

Looking forward to your return,

Kaz

14th letter

Dear Y/N,

Your letter reached me, and I've got to say, the way you put it into words – how much you miss me – it hits home. The distance is a constant reminder of the warmth I've grown accustomed to, and I find myself missing you more than I thought possible.

This job is driving me insane, and my thoughts often wander back to Ketterdam, back to you. It's like a pull, a magnetic force that tugs me back to the life we've been building together.

I bought something with me – a box of those chocolates you can't seem to get enough of. The catch? I'm hoping they survive the journey and don't turn into a gooey mess.

I want you to know that with every sunrise and sunset that passes, I'm getting more restless to return to the city that's been our canvas, our backdrop. Until then, my thoughts are with you, and I'm eagerly counting down the days until I can wrap my arms around you again.

With all my longing,

Kaz

3rd note

I apologize, it seems the chocolates didn’t fare too well. I hope they’re still somewhat salvageable and that they manage to satisfy your sweet tooth.

- Kaz

15th letter

Dear Y/N,

I hope this letter finds you on the mend, wrapped in warmth and taking good care of yourself. It pains me to know you're unwell while I'm away, unable to offer even the smallest comfort.

My love, get well soon. I miss your laughter, your presence – they're a part of my life I can't bear to be without for long. The distance feels heavier when I know you're not well.

Today, during the heist, I saw a small brown cat with delicate white spots. The sight of it was like a reminder of simpler times, of moments when things were less complex. It stirred memories of my old cat "Spots," whose antics used to provide a reprieve from the realities of the Barrel.

As I look around, I find myself yearning for the day when I'll return to Ketterdam. Until then, my thoughts are with you, my love. Rest well, recover soon, and know that I will be there soon.

With all my affection,

Kaz

16th letter

Dearest Y/N,

There are times in life when words are inadequate, when even the most eloquent phrases fall short of capturing the depth of one's emotions. Today is one such day, and I find myself grappling with a sentiment that defies my usual precision.

I love you, Y/N. There, I've said it, though the words seem almost insufficient to convey the weight of my feelings. You've woven your presence into the very fabric of my being, and I find that I'm navigating uncharted territory, stumbling upon emotions that have long remained dormant.

In a world marked by uncertainties, you've become my constant, the one I turn to when the winds of the Barrel grow fierce. I cherish our bond, our shared history, and the future we're forging together.

As the days pass, my conviction only grows stronger. You've touched a part of me I thought was unreachable, and I find myself grateful for the warmth you've brought into my life.

Love,

Kaz

4th note

I love you too, more than words can express.

- Love, y/n!

17th letter

My Love,

I've stumbled upon something while on my trip to Lij, a revelation that caught me by surprise. My old house is up for sale. I confess, it's a notion that's been hovering in the back of my mind, a possibility I've been toying with.

And then, as if fate had a hand to play, it occurred to me – what if we made it our own? Y/N, would you consider it? The thought of creating new memories in a space that's intertwined with my past is something that holds a certain allure. A place where we could carve out our own sanctuary, away from the schemes and chaos that surround us.

If this notion speaks to you, let me know. It's a step I'd only take with you, a shared decision that would mark a new chapter in our journey together.

Love,

Kaz

18th letter

This is to certify that Y/N L/N and Kaz Brekker is (are) now registered as the absolute proprietor(s) of the land comprised in the above-mentioned title, subject to the entries in the register relating to the land and to such of the overriding interests set out in section 30 of the Registered Land Act as may for the time being subsist and affect the land.

Kaz Brekker __________

19th letter

My love Y/N,

I hope this letter finds you in good spirits, even though I’m far away in Shu Han. I wanted to share something with you – I stumbled upon the perfect dining table. It’s a piece that seems to embody the essence of what we’ve built together, a symbol of the life we’re crafting, even from a distance.

As I stand here, thousands of miles away, my thoughts are never far from Ketterdam, from you. Every corner of the city is a reminder of our shared journey, of the future we’re molding. And with every passing day, I find myself longing to return, to be by your side again.

The plans we’ve made, the dreams we’ve spun – they’re a driving force, propelling me forward through the challenges that Shu Han presents. I promise you, Y/N, I’ll be back soon enough.

Until then, know that you’re in my thoughts, my heart, every moment of the day.

With all my affection,

Kaz

20th letter

Love,

I’ve come across some interesting information that might be of use to you. It seems that there’s a rumor circulating about a certain merchant in the Fifth Harbor. This merchant, it’s said, has been trying to make deals with both the Merchants Council and the Whitecrows, something that has my interest piqued.

I’ve also managed to uncover some details about a potential source of counterfeit currency that might be making its way into the hands of certain unsavory individuals. The source, surprisingly, seems to be tied to a printing press hidden away in the Barrel. It’s a curious development, one that could have far-reaching consequences.

And finally, I’ve received word that a shipment of goods has gone missing from a storage warehouse near the docks. This might not seem significant at first glance, but it’s the timing that intrigues me. A missing shipment, coupled with the merchant’s deals and the counterfeit currency – it’s all connected, I’m certain of it.

Stay vigilant, stay cautious. And know that even in the midst of our separate tasks, you’re in my thoughts.

I miss you, and I love you.

Love,

Kaz

21st letter

Y/N,

Listen to me, and listen carefully. You need to come back to Ketterdam, now. What you walked into, it was a trap – calculated, deliberate. I can’t explain it all in this letter, but trust me when I say your safety is in jeopardy.

I don’t care what you’re in the middle of, what plan you’re executing – drop it, and make your way back. I can’t lose you, not now, not like this. The threat is real, and the longer you stay where you are, the more danger you’re in.

I’m begging you, Y/N, hurry back. We can sort through the details, I’ll explain everything, but right now, all that matters is your safety. Don’t delay, don’t second-guess. Just come back.

Kaz

22nd letter

Love,

I’m pleading with you, begging you to reach out, to let me know you’re safe. This silence, it’s a torment I can’t bear. Every thought is tinged with worry, and I find myself grappling with scenarios that are far too grim.

I don’t care about the details, the reasons – they pale in comparison to my overwhelming need to know you’re okay. We’ve faced down darkness together, navigated treacherous waters, and I can’t accept the idea of you being lost in the midst of it all.

Please, Y/N, come back to Ketterdam. If you’re reading this, if you’re anywhere, find a way to let me know you’re alive. I’ll make sense of the rest later. Just, my love, come back to me.

Kaz

23rd letter

Y/N,

I can’t wait any longer. The silence is a weight on my chest, a suffocating reminder of the unknown. I’ve agonized, I’ve begged, and still, there’s no word from you. It’s time I take matters into my own hands.

Please, hold on. I’m coming. I hope you’re okay, I hope you’re just out of reach, waiting for me to catch up. It’s a risk I have to take.

I love you.

Stay strong, my love. I’m on my way.

24th letter

My Dearest Y/N,

It's been a week since you left us, a week of darkness and aching emptiness that nothing can fill. I know you won't get this letter, that these words will remain suspended in the void, but I find myself needing to put them down, needing to release the feelings that have taken hold of me.

The pain is suffocating, a weight that's settled into my bones. I still can't grasp the reality, can't accept that you're gone, that your light has been extinguished. It's a void that stretches beyond comprehension, a void I'm stumbling through.

The memories are a double-edged sword. They're a balm, a reminder of the moments we shared, of your laughter, your warmth. But they're also a blade, a reminder of what's been taken from us, of the future that was stolen away.

I want you to know, even though you'll never read these words – I love you. I always have, and I always will. You were more than a partner, more than a confidant. You were my anchor, my solace, my reason to keep pushing forward.

It's impossible to fathom life without you, Y/N. Your absence leaves a void that can never be filled. I can only hope that wherever you are, you're at peace, free from the pain that's gripped my heart.

Until we meet again, my love,

Kaz

25th letter

My dearest Y/N,

Six months have passed, and the ache of your absence has only deepened. The city, our city, is a different place without you. The crows, the ones you brought together, are slowly finding their separate paths, their separate destinies. It's as if the world itself is reshaping in your absence.

I found the little box where you kept all those letters. Your letters, my words – I'm surprised, in a way, that you kept them all. It's a piece of you that I'll treasure forever.

It's in these moments of solitude that I find myself yearning for your presence the most. Your laughter, your insights – they're still very much alive in my memories, and they continue to guide me through the labyrinthine twists of this world.

I miss you, Y/N. More than words can say. The void you left behind is as vast as the Barrel itself, and there's a hollowness that's impossible to fill. I can only hope that, wherever you are, you've found the peace that eluded you in life.

Until the next time we meet, my love,

Kaz

26th letter

My Dearest Y/N,

Time has continued its relentless march, and two years have slipped through my grasp since you left us. The city, once our canvas, has taken on a different hue, a different weight. The crows have scattered, their paths diverging, and the life we built together feels like a distant memory.

I wanted to share something with you – I've made a decision about the house, the one that once held the echoes of our shared history. It's a decision born out of the reality that without you, it's ceased to be a home. The walls, the rooms – they're empty without your presence, and it's a stark reminder of what's been lost.

Putting it up for sale again, it's not just about letting go of a physical space. It's about acknowledging that our time together, our shared moments, live on in memories, not in bricks and mortar. I carry you with me, always, but it's time to release the hold the house had on me.

Life continues to move forward, though it's a path I tread with a shadow that can never be dispelled. I hope, wherever you are, you've found the peace that eluded you in life. And I hope, wherever I am, you're watching over me, your presence a guiding light through the darkness.

With a heart full of love,

Kaz

27th letter

My dearest,

It's been almost three years, and some days it feels like it was just yesterday when I last saw you. I miss you, fuck, I miss you so much. It's like this gaping hole, this emptiness that can't be filled. No matter how many schemes I plan, no matter how many crows I put to work, it's like there's this void that's always there.

I was gonna do it, you know? I was gonna ask you. I got this ring, this small little thing that I bought just a month before you fucking died. It's funny, you know, I never thought I'd be the one to feel this way, to want something that much, to want to stake a claim in this shithole of a world.

But I guess that's what you did to me. You turned this cold, calculating schemer into someone who wanted more, who wanted you. I'm sorry I didn't ask you sooner, that I waited, that I let time slip through my fingers like sand. I'm sorry I couldn't be the one you deserved.

You were my light, Y/N. You shined a light into my darkest corners, and now that you're gone, it's like the shadows have returned with a vengeance. I need you, I need you so fucking much it's like a knife in my gut every damn day.

I don't know where you are, what's out there after this life, but I hope you're somewhere better. I hope you're at peace, and I hope you know that I'm here, waiting in this shithole, missing you every fucking day.

I love you, Y/N. I love you so fucking much it hurts. And I wish... I wish I could've showed it more when you were still here.

With all my shattered pieces,

Kaz

28th letter

Deer Y/N,

This will be the last letter I write to you, and as I put pen to paper, I’m filled with a mixture of emotions that words could never truly capture. The passage of time has been unkind, separating us by years that have felt both fleeting and eternal.

It’s strange, the way grief works. It’s a steady ache that never truly fades, an ache I’ve grown accustomed to carrying. There’s an emptiness in my heart that’s become a part of me, a void that can never be filled by anyone or anything else.

I’ve learned to navigate this world without you, though it’s been a journey fraught with challenges and moments of unbearable pain. There’s a longing, a yearning, that can never be quenched. You were my constant, the force that kept me grounded, and now that you’re gone, there’s a piece of me that will forever remain incomplete.

As time marches on, I find myself grappling with a heartbreaking reality – the sound of your voice is fading from my memory. The way you felt, the touch of your hand in mine, it’s becoming harder to recall. It’s as though the vibrant details of your presence are slipping through my fingers, leaving behind a hazy impression.

And oh, Y/N, the thought that your laughter will never again reach my ears, it’s a pain that reverberates through my very being. Your face, once etched in my mind with unparalleled clarity, is beginning to blur around the edges. The little details that I once treasured, the nuances that made you uniquely you, they’re slipping away, like grains of sand carried by the wind.

I love you, Y/N. Those words have become a mantra, a whispered refrain that echoes in the corners of my mind. I carry your memory with me, every step of the way, and I hold onto the hope that, wherever you are, you’ve found the peace that eluded you in life.

As I place this letter alongside the others, a part of me hopes that somehow, somewhere, you’ll receive these words, that you’ll know that you were loved, that you’re still loved, even in your absence.

I miss you, “we all misses you very much.”

Love, Kaz!

#fanfiction #kaz brekker x reader #six of crows #six of crows x reader #angst #fluff #kaz brekker #i cry now #flangst

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ntls-24722 · 1 month

Note

im struggling with drawing dj PLEASE make a titorial PLEASE

Luckily for you, I already have!

At least, for his face... but!! I'm going to do it again, because i have this sticker right on my keyboard of his face traced out (though it's missing his chin, chin stripe, and headphone...thingies????) so I've had a lot more time to be staring at his beautiful face more. That and I'm going to be making a tutorial for the rest of his body!

So yes, 2 rectangles, both placed in the middle axis of the big one and one of them being perpendicular. But, I think the sizes and placements should be changed a little - So! the middle rectangle should be on the bottom because I realized that in the old one, DJ would've had very small eyes with the old frame, which is NO BUENO!! He has colossal orbits, huge peepers, much like the jumping spiders that everyone just kind of collectively (and understandably) assumed he would be.

Additionally, I decided to make the blue, vertical rectangle in this almost like a square. I literally drew this already, stared at sticker, felt it didn't look right, so i stretched the fucker out and this is more... close I think. DJ's face is exceptionally wide which i feel is a learning curve since when we're making human faces, they are very Long instead. So more like square and then a rectangle at the bottom like it's being tucked in.

So, with the around the same width of the edges of the pink rectangle that protude out from the blue rectangle, make the chin as an extension of the blue rectangle at the bottom (in orange). And, very important, because the cheeks will be the base for a lot of the upcoming facial stuff, add the cheeks! make sure they kind of come off from the rectangular frame a little bit because they do that

SO! Guideline essentials for what I'm about to make next. From the middle of the cheek make a line down to the bottom (pink) - this marks where you will have the corners of his mouth end. There is the bottom of the cheek that you'll make a horizontal line for (magenta), and then there is the horizontal top of the bottom rectangle (orange). The orange-magenta lines mark the area where the bottom of his nose resides, and the magenta line is where the top lip and bottom of nose end.

I'm getting wayy too into guide-shit but. Nose! big circle 2 and little circles at the sides and his Mouth, this curvy little rectangle that just fits right up in the guidelines.

EYES. ORBS. HUGE

A quarter of them is kind of flush with the nose but they're BIG and very Circular

Smooth everything out? A problem that I have with making DJ is that he has some space with the eyebrows and the forehead but i just forget to draw it in favor making the eyebrows bigger

From the cheeks to the head and the face to the chin, it kinda curves in like that - and the edges of the teeth follow the edges of the blue rectangle from earlier.

I made the eyes a little bigger here oops

Add lips, and make the bottom row of teeth 2 teeth shorter than the top row. And on teeth, DJ has a very gummy smile, and his gums take up half of his teeth when his teeth are closed! (not so much when they're open)

Add the sharp/flat piano keys on the bottom of his teeth, and that's DJ's face!

Now onto the rest of his body!

Very big thing i will say to you. DJMM's body is stupid. It's wack as fuck. These proportions are outrageous. The neck is stupid thin and has such a stupid placement. The head is enourmous. What the fuck is going on here.

Okay so side view (holes in the sides are where the arms attach), and an above and below view.

the ??? i literally. i don't know what they are. they're these golden grommets on his back or something i have no idea what purpose they serve

Also, the hole, there's a big long hole that runs beside his bottom speakers.

His body is kind of polygonal? It's Egg shaped, but it might help you to know there is some edge to it. All of the circles are where the Joints attach to his body.

Speaking of joints, THOSE are the most wack thing about DJ by far.

His joints are built like this, where his arms have these little sockets at the joint? They're trying to make a ball and socket joint but because of the socket, they're severely limiting how much the arm can bend - the picture that I sent of him above this is the MOST his arms can bend without clipping into itself because of it and it. mm. It makes me mad esp because there's better ways of doing it

If you want to be super canon compliant you can add those but you can also do the Music Man method: just straight up being a ball and 2 sticks with no further details and it works just fine because no one will notice

The arms clipping into itself is always a little inevitable but man i can only wonder. was there truly no better way of doing it

The neck has these same joints as well, and with all of those together - you have a DJ! (add headphones and top hat as well. lol)

(now excuse me as i post the almost daily music man, which completely goes against 99% of this post.... mainly bc i only honed this down Right Now)

#ntls-24722 #djmm #dj music man #ask #fnaf djmm #djmm fnaf #dj music man fnaf #fnaf dj music man #security breach

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project-sekai-facts · 6 months

Note

Regarding your post about censorship: I'm like 90% sure most of this is not censorship (they left the entirety of buddy funny as it was. I refuse to believe "partner" is where they draw the line). I've played tons of Japanese video games in official English; the usual standard for translation is, in practice, that it shouldn't be obvious it wasn't originally written in English. Imo, this is the actual difference between "the miles i fell in love with is so cool!" (Not grammatically incorrect but not how actual people speak) and the official. As for it having romantic connotation to begin with, lol you said you got that from looking it up but Google the same thing in English and you will still get only romantic advice because it just assumes you're asking when the appropriate time to say I love you in a relationship is.... It could've been a joke, or a gay allegation, an anime way of speaking, or even nothing. How would you know which? I absolutely do not mean this in a rude way and I'm really sorry if it comes off like that but. I don't think you can comment on the connotations of words or level of casualness without speaking the language yourself.

Same with minoharu; it's (unfortunately) not canon. If she actually said "I love you!!" Regardless of dictionary definitions, it will be read as a romantic confession by most players, and you often say the game likes ambiguity so I take it that's a no. "I like you!" Is rather an awkward thing to yell in english, though. So "you're the best" is what they substitute.

(Please don't blame the translators for stuff this insignificant tbh. Some things in early game may sound clunky, but they've really smoothed out over time in terms of word choice sounding natural (...event names notwithstanding). I've done translations between my first language and English for fun; if you linger on every last word and it's connotations, you will go /insane/ reallyyy quickly. Imo no two words in different languages have the exact same meaning, connotation, use case etc. Ever. Differences of this level are utterly inevitable when games have so much text.)

Anyway. Thanks for all the effort you put into this blog, it's a fantastic one and it's not my intention to be harsh, if it comes off like that please just delete this ask. Don't feel bad about something some stranger on the internet said.

to be honest I don't think it's all censorship either, i just kinda went off on a tangent about things getting removed in translation and i did put in the post reasons why these translations actually are valid (aside from Toya woao because they did leave that one in the card name so it was a deliberate choice to remove it from the story, thereby also removing the reference in the card name). That Asahi post is old and I have done more research into it since, because my JP isn't good so I've gotta make up for it somehow, and literally every dictionary definition and anything I can find for that word frames it as romantic. For the extra mile I checked Japanese dictionaries for languages other than English. It is romantic. Even if he's just talking about the character and not Tsukasa, it is romantic and removing it was a deliberate choice. "The miles i fell in love with is so cool" might sound a bit rough, but it could have still been translated to keep the original context no problem. You could've just done something like "well of course it was cool. i fell in love with miles for a reason" or "it was so cool! as expected of the miles i love". the thing is with writing for a game like this is sometimes people need to say things that in real life you would probably just say in your head. the POV character for this event is Rui so we can't just take a look at the thoughts of the characters, which is why what they're feeling needs to be conveyed through text even if it sacrifices a bit of the realism. especially in a visual novel styled game like this because the characters are limited to a 2D model with limited movement and expression. if this was an anime you could probably get more leeway with what they say because you can convey the character's feelings through various other means (eg: the animated MVs that don't have any dialogue but could convey a story and emotion much better than looking at the in-game version of the scene with no dialogue). Don't worry I don't think you came off as rude and I know I shouldn't really talk about a language I don't speak but I hope the research can at least kind of make up for it.

Minoharu isn't canon I know but it's very obvious that what Minori feels for Haruka goes into romantic territory, whether you like the ship or not. And sure, if you put "I love you" most people would probably read it as romantic by default, but that hasn't stopped the translators before. "You're the best" honestly is a valid localisation that still conveys pretty much the same meaning I just find it odd that "I love you" is removed here, a flashback scene from a point in time where minori and haruka didn't know each other, but is translated with accuracy in multiple interactions between An and Kohane in present day. If Minori and Haruka don't know each other it's slightly less likely that people will interpret it as romantic and slightly more likely that people will interpret it as a simple idolisation but with An an Kohane actually knowing each other and having a close and affectionate relationship the go-to is probably gonna be romantic (which isn't necessarily wrong considering the events of BFST and Wishing for Your Happiness, but still sticks out that they left this in here but change it for another couple with heavy romantic subtext).

I'm not blaming this on the translators, they're just doing their job and obviously with localisation you've gotta lose stuff, it's just that some of these are very specific things to cut (eg: any indication of Asahi feeling romantically towards Tsukasa's character and ambiguously Tsukasa himself is completely absent in the official translation). I'm blaming this on the higher ups at sega who get the final say on what is and isn't included in the translation. You can't translate everything directly because languages don't all work exactly the same, especially english and japanese. obviously due to these differences, you're not going to be able to translate everything directly and localisation is necessary (regardless of language) to make it accessible and easy to read for an audience outside the country of origin. but there are gonna be questions raised when a scene is localised to keep the same nuance as the original text aside from one line that removes notable queer subtext. because if they can keep the rest of toya's speech in line with the original but they specifically remove the part about him wanting to stay side-by-side with akito forever and change it to wanting to perform side-by-side, despite the fact they left in the "now on and always" part in his card name, that was removed from the story intentionally. they kept what asahi says to tsukasa with the same meaning as well, but any indication of asahi feeling romantically towards the other is completely gone. the issue is that sega seems to be intentionally removing queer subtext from the game.

don't worry anon this wasn't harsh, and localisation is something that actually interests me and i've read into quite a bit, so i enjoy the opportunity to talk about it. and thank you as well!

#asks #mod talks

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ummmmandy · 2 months

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ask answerin 👇

-Yeah go for it! 👍

-That's kind of an exciting idea, I've vaguely thought about doing something like that before actually. BUT if I think about it a little more there are things about it I wouldn't be totally sure about…..

Feel something like that would work well for hairstyles! I'd be pretty open to that if people were interested.

Tho when I think about adding commissioned clothing items, it's like, the first person I aim to please when I make these games is myself ya know??.. I want to like everything I put in there at the very least. I assume I'd be adding stuff to an already finished game, so what if I get asked to put something in I'm not crazy about or I don't feel like goes well with the style of the game or something? Gets complicated lol.

ALSO I have no idea how I would price individual items. Idk what people would want to pay for something like that (and still have it be worth the effort to draw and add in and everything).

-That is kinda what I was picturing too, doing games for people's ocs and stuff would be prrrrretty fun I think. But yea pricing would have to at least be comparable to the other games I make (I'm so slow if I charged hourly I feel like these games would cost 500,000,000 dollars lmao) for it to really be worth it….and idk how many people would be interested in that (even if they were done on a smaller scale).

Sort of an alternative to a whole dress up game commission could be those things where you draw the character once and then just draw like 3 different outfit versions or whatever. Like a lookbook thing. Which I've also thought would be fun to offer ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#text stuff #answering asks

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murderofsomeone · 6 months

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art related boundaries/concerns

(making this post since I've been getting a lot of questions lately)

hi I'm an adult. please take this within that context.

using my art for pfps/profiles is fine, credit is optional but preferred. this doesn't apply to ocs: please ask first and always credit

drawing my ocs/designs is always fine and encouraged

don't reupload my art without asking. i'm ok if you're just like. sending it to someone, idgaf, just as long as it's private

don't sell my art

don't remove watermarks. I understand they sometimes get cropped out for formatting reasons but that's about the only thing I'll excuse

don't draw nsfw content of my characters/designs/stories. don't send it to me either if you find any

don't put my underage characters/designs in weird situations, especially genderbending and aging them up (if I make an adult design of them that still doesn't give you the right to be weird)

making fanfiction, crossovers, and aus of my stuff is pretty rad. if you want to make one go ahead, just remember to be respectful

I don't have any strong opinions about people kinning my characters/designs, so it's all good. just remember to be respectful

I feel kinda weird about people headcanoning sexualities, gender identities, disorders, ethnicities, etc to my characters/designs. a lot of these things are already set in stone and I'd prefer you just ask.

I'm ok with people asking for alternative versions of drawings (ie: removing the text or background). the only exception is if it's too much work to bother

I really don't mind questions about my characters/designs/stories. it isn't annoying and I do appreciate opportunities to talk about them

practice common internet etiquette by not sending weird sexual comments directed to my characters/designs. saying stuff like "I want him" is fine and funny, I just don't want to hear about your dick

I draw entirely for fun and do things when they seem funny/relevant, do not assume I ever owe you anything

if you find me being a "hypocrite" about any of these because there are exceptions and feel the need to be an ass, i may be inclined to throw rocks at you

If you need clarifications or have questions feel free to ask, but this is generally what's set in stone.

#some of these are weirdly specific which implies that things have happened #and the bad part is that they most likely did #important #mos text post

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plasmasimagination · 5 months

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Hi! Congrats on getting 300+ followers!! If it's cool, may I get a matchup for Honkai Star Rail? (Sorry if it's long,,,, I'm just super excited and happy for youu windidbid) (please no sampo)

I'm an INFJ who's pronouns are she/they. My sun in Gemini, my moon is in Ares and my rising is cancer.

I'd describe myself as curious, easily excitable, pretty witty, a bit shy, bubbly, and low-key feral. I'm observant and calculating by nature, but I tend to keep that hidden. At times, I do tend to be depressive and super anxious (due to past bullying). In addition, I have a habit of being really hard on myself and pushing myself to my limits. I'm in a better place now, but sometimes it haunts me.Gaining my trust is pretty hard, but if you do, I'm riding or dying for life.

I like to try new things(, foods, activities, ext.) The issue is I have a weak stomach and get sick easily if I don't get enough sleep 😅 (strong mind, weak body hdudbdj)

I love cozy things!!(soft pastels, blankets, oversized sweaters, big scarves, stuffed animals, fairy lights) But I also have a love for the macabre My favourite outfit on cooler days consist of oversized sweaters, leggings, runners and a giant blanket scarf on top!

My hobbies include reading, writing, singing (in private) drawing, napping, learning new things, and playing video games. In the winter I love to figureskate!!! I know a bunch of tricks on the ice.

People have described me the following:

super self-aware

Constantly nervous (kinda true),

" riddle wrapped in an enigma, locked in a box, then shoved in a beehive" - my sibling

the grandma friend (Specifically the one wanting for their husband to come home from the war idk why tho)

Unhinged at times

Goofy insights

I tend to joke around with my older sister about them buying me something (like a snack or something) but the moment they say "alright bet" and then proceed to buy me the said thing I get flustered and be like "noooooo :(( I was just kidding >_< pls i take it backkkkkk)) because I'm not used to being on the receiving end of this kind of stuff.

I actually like to sing. It's just that I'm shy about it and only sing when I'm either by myself or comforting someone. When people catch me singing, they’re shocked af. I've had an where people from my church group with the priest (like around 30) caught me singing, and we had a staring contest for about 15 seconds before they bombarded me in compliments.

I've eaten a burrito with North Carolina Reaper sauce out of curiosity and ended up getting sick as a result (I even had to sign a waiver when I ordered it ahebej)

Thank youuu!

HELLOO HI HI HI HI CUTIEPIEEEEE, absolutely thankful for the amazingly written request *mwah mwah mwah* was very easy for me to write because you let me know everything I needed

And I match you up with

JING YUAN

No words. You two are a match made in heaven

Your calculating nature + his observant nature = absolute power duo

He would absolutely not allow you to push yourself to your limits. He will nicely distract you from something he thinks you're overdoing/ hurting yourself by doing it, he will tell you there's no need for it, and reassure you

YOU LIKE COZY THINGS?? WELL GREAT!! Jing yuan himself is just super cozy to be around, he's like a huge cotton ball, super soft and cuddly!!!

You say you're constantly nervous? Take a Jing yuan, he might not make it dissapear, he's not god obviously, but he will try his best to calm you down, telling you to breath, speaking softly to you, just generally trying his best to make you be comfortable

Enigma....hm not a problem for Jing yuan, as we know he can reach deep into people's hearts and feelings, i assume he would also be like that with you, taking his sweet time over the course of you guys being together to understand you, every small thing about you, even some things you didn't even know yourself about yourself

He always can't help to chuckle at how sweet and cute you are at times, he's the type of man to get you anything you ever dreamed off, and will spoil you in every category, and he finds it even more satisfying seeing your reactions to his small surprises

All in all, I think you two are perfect for each other and when u marry I expect to be invited to the wedding 🥰🗡️

Don't forget to eat and drink babe, take rest, and stay cute

#jing yuan x y/n #honkai jing yuan #jing yuan x you #jing yuan x reader #jing yuan #hsr icons #hsr spoilers #hsr imagines #hsr x reader #hsr #honkai star rail fanart #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail #honkai star rail x gender neutral reader #honkai star rail x you

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residentfurry · 3 months

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Oc infodump/ Verdugo speculative biology

@wisecrackingeric-2

This is part Mari post part verdugo speculative biology post! So please keep in mind this is all speculative x)

The basic story of the Verdugo is that there are two of them; Salazar's scientist and housekeeper. They are bioweapons that are basically made of gene spliced human, insect, and Plaga DNA, made by the scientist before turning himself into a Verdugo.

Mari is based off/ was infected by the scientist Verdugo (the one you see in the main remake) so we'll be mostly focusing on the traits of that one mostly!

(Also it's not confirmed in-game that the scientist Verdugo could infect people, but in the DLC the housekeeper Verdugo infects Ada with what seems to be it's own type of parasite/plaga, since it gets expelled from her body after the death of the Verdugo and that doesn't happen with other Plaga. I like to think that if Ada hasn't killed the Verdugo, she would've turned into one.)

Which was kinda the inspiration for Mari! Kinda a fun "what if" situation. What if the Verdugo had infected someone besides Ada, having been able to do so before?

As a Verdugo, she shares many similarities with with the insects the scientist had extracted the DNA from. Based off the Verdugo models, I would assume that they're cricket/grasshopper DNA! Several of the species I have as examples below are actually from Spain/Europe, so it's very likely the scientist used them in his experiments!

(Insects pictured: Mole cricket, Bush cricket, Giant Weta, and Grasshopper)

The legs, mandibles, even the unique 'hands' are all features that the Verdugo have! (Or at least variants of them) Even though Mari's design doesn't start far from the in-game models^ I usually keep the insect part of her in mind when drawing her!

The part where my own concepts/ speculation comes in is usually in her behavior.

Which begs some questions!

Could Mari chirp like a grasshopper or cricket?

Yes! It's my personal headcanon that she could grow wings and shed them at will (as alot of bioweapons in re can mutate at will) and while she has these wings, she could technically chirp!

What would her wings look like?

I would imagine that they would be transparent or a kind of ashy brown.

How does a Verdugo like Mari crawl through small spaces like vents? (Like in the game?)

I personally headcanon that she can flatten her body, much like a roach! This helps her fit into small spaces that she shouldn't otherwise fit into.

What other similarities does Mari have with insects?

Like Grasshoppers, Mari's ears is located on her side, just above her legs!

Does Mari have abilities like the other Verdugo/ bioweapons?

Mari can do basically everything the scientist Verdugo could do. For example, she is extremely difficult to kill and is pretty much impossible to kill by gunfire. She can also transform into that long-tailed form (like in the Verdugo fight with Leon) and use that tail with precise accuracy. Other than that, she has passive regeneration and can regrow a limb if lost in under a week. She also has the same weaknesses as the scientist Verdugo and becomes sluggish in the extreme cold. (TLDR: she has strength, agility, and can kill anything in many different ways while being kinda untouchable herself. Not that she'd want to, of course, but she could!)

Could she infect others and turn them into Verdugo?

Yes :3c

How does she get along with Ashley? Shouldn't she be under some sort of control via Plaga?

She may still have some residual instincts (because she is a bioweapon after all) but she isn't influenced to directly harm Ashley or well...anyone.

Usually Verdugos and bioweapons are hyper aggressive, but Mari isn't. She isn't "mind controlled" like the other Verdugo/cultists (at least not in the same way.) I don't know if I want to reveal too much of her backstory just yet but there's a good legitimate reason for all that stuff. ^ I tried to make her as canon adjacent as possible so she could actually be a legitimate character within the re universe.

But what was the thought behind The creation of Mari?

The whole reason I wanted to make Mari is to basically...give explanation to what Ashley is doing after the events of re4, as well as give her some more character depth and explore what we really don't get to see in the games: how does a bioweapon event/ attack effect someone long term? I wanted to explore Ashley's trauma and her desires and what she decides/wants to do moving forward, and Mari is kind of a narrative device to help with that. She doesn't just stop existing once she's saved, ya know?

Did I create Mari just because I wanted more Ashley content? Yes. Absolutely. I love Ashley as a character and I think she's so interesting!! I want to see more of her!! So Mari is just my excuse to pretend that I'm Capcom making filler content for what Ashley's doing LOL

Overall, props on whoever designed the Verdugo in the remake, because it's one of my fav monster designs ever and is just so beautifully detailed (as well as it's partial xenomorph inspiration!) and is just so cool in general!

So ya that's some facts/speculation about Mari and the Verdugos! ^-^

#resident evil #resident evil 4 #re4 #re4 remake #verdugo #oc x canon #monster oc #speculative biology #resident barks #TY ERIC FOR THE COMMENT UR A REAL ONE!!!!#kept calling the scientist verdugo the scientist bc I'm too lazy to look up his name. anywyas

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faorism · 1 year

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thinking about @bisexual-enby-jellyfish talking about the lack of time travel fic in the fandom, and got me thinking that since canon is satisfying, instead of fix its, we gotta have break its.

BITTERSWEET CANON COMPLIANT PONDERINGS AHEAD

canon lev:red era and pardison is out on a mission for alecs non-leverage side hustle, and they are going to a specific town which they remember distantly eliot talking about it, from years back, how that was a moment of decision for him early in his military career. it was there—eliot admitted when he was feeling especially vulnerable, with a smile that was supposed to be funny but really wasnt—it was there that put him on the path that lost his soul. that comment has a lot more weight now, after eliot saying he has lonely he has been for years (which still haunts parker), and how apparently he told sophie he cannot be redeemed (which is now haunting hardison), and because of all the hitting eliots body is starting to betray him (which scares them both). maybe before they left, they had a tense argument. eliot wanted to go with them, but pardison was like?? you legit told us this is #trauma for you, no. and eliots shrug of a response to what it would put him through sat ill with them.

the memories of eliots unhappiness gives pardison the willies but they try to move on, but something feels... off? anyway MAGIC the resonances of eliot's soul-ache draw the two in to a long abandoned military coup base and they get sent back to around 20/21ish eliot (with alec around 35, the age difference between them but reverse in of s1).

they dont meet right the second they land, but its close: eliot finds pardison in the active base, and he rescues them because he thinks hardison and parker are his retrieval targets. (parker... was under the impression eliot wasn't able to get in time to save the real target in his timeline?? hardison just grumbles uhh.... multiple universes are a headfck irl.)

eliot is on an extended mission, one of his first serious solo ones, one that is clearly testing him out for recruitment for special ops. so hardison and parker can't be whisked away and has to stick around eliot For Reasons with an assumed identity. pardison realizes that eliot's mission can be better resolved (aka little/no bloodshed) with a con, and they convince eliot to go along. they aren't there long per se, but there is a lot of thrills and suspense and tension and idk plot stuff, i hate plot stuff so imagine that's happening in the background.

throughout it all, hardison and parker treat eliot like they normally would... which is utterly familiar and intimate, which throws young eliot. and by throws i mean seduces accidentally. eliot gets all heart-eyed, which hardison and parker don't notice right away because they miss their home time, but also eliot just always kinda acts like that. eliot is falling so hard but he tries to be respectful because obviously pardison is together, but a man can dream...

hardison and parker have Talks about how important it is to not change the past, as much as their presence undoubtedly has changed something. but as much as hardison is genre aware, it's harder for him. the rawness of eliot's confession—that he doesn't think he can ever be redeemed—sits heavily on hardison. and he also is like... why are we here, why were brought back? maybe we are supposed to heal a hurt, right a wrong, maybe... parker just wants to go home.

but she is the one who breaks. eliot is shot at and hurt while protecting them, and the screams from parker and hardison are just... gut wrenching. and as hardison is patching eliot's shoulder up and parker is wiping down eliot's dirt and sweat-drenched face, eliot is like... something aint right with you two. hardison tries to deflect with a joke, but eliot is like, no. you... know me. you care about me. please—he interrupts, when hardison is about to deny harder—the truth. and hardison and parker look at each other. she nods so hardison tells him. some of it, but enough. he tells eliot that they know him from the future. they work together, but it's more than that. parker and hardison arent sure how they came back, but they know some of the why. maybe. they are gonna help eliot, and maybe they get back to their time. maybe not. but they aren't gonna abandon eliot here if they can help it.

eliot gets quiet and is like... do you... are we... and hardison furrows his brows. eliot decides to be brave, braver than he may have ever felt before (and thats saying something) and he asks, are we together? and parker is like, yeah he just told you, we are a team, have been for years, we're family and eliot is like no not... hardison and parker are like what?? and eliot just shakes his head and is like, when you say family, you mean...?

hardison pauses from his stitching to say, you two have a permanent kill switch for my computers in case i go evil mad scientist. and parker says only you and alec can look over my harnesses before i jump. i don't double check your work anymore. hardison says you... and what can he say that would make sense to this eliot? what would have the weight? you let us take care of you.

eliot's eyes go wide, hardison's observation landing just right, and here is where parker meets her limit. dont enlist, she says

and eliot, stunned, tries to make a joke to cut the tension choking him: he looks over his gear and is like, little late for that, darlin'.

and parker is like, don't join black ops. go to aimee back as soon as you can.

parker breaks because... parker sees this eliot, this softer version of himself and parker loves eliot, her eliot, but also this one. she didnt know what eliot had lost but now she knows. she knows and she has the power to do something. she can't hoard eliot away when things can. be. better. for. him. she knows what make us us, but...... us is a lonely eliot. us is an eliot that feels damned. us is an eliot who deserves so much more, everything, anything. they can promise him robot bodies, but there's something else they can give him. a life beyond what he... what he had to make with them. a life with whatever eliot calls a soul.

hardison gasps parker but doesn't disagree with her, and if eliot had doubts they were from the future or had some special knowledge about him, this was proof enough.

and what'll happen if i dont?

parker hugs herself tight: you can have a good life, el. the one you want.

what do you know what i want? and god, he sounds so much like their eliot but also so much his twenty/twenty-one years.

it's what you've told us, hardison says.

and what about what we got? parker and hardison don't say anything. i don't think its enough? i ever say that? exactly that?

parker and hardison want to say yes, but they can't. they also cant quite say no. both hurt. the lack of clarity burns.

as parker and hardison try to find the words to convince him, eliot just sighs. in your time, did i even tell you i love y'all two?

and parker... okay, look there's a lot going on and she is very very sad and she is always very very shocked. so she responds, you don't love us.

eliot gets that... that fucking martyr smile of his: the way you treat me? respect me? and... you two are gorgeous. funny. smart. there's no way i aint in love.

and parker is like. you can't know that.

eliot is like, i can because im halfway there myself. more than halfway, if im honest.

and parker and hardison are... floored. no, you can't love us, hardison repeats. he is sure of this. he has to be.

eliot: future me or now?

hardison: either. both. eliot, you can't love us. eliot can't. that... that doesn't make sense. no. god, what have they been doing for fifteen years if... no. god no. if eliot loved them, he would have said something. they would be together. no. this eliot is so green and young and unbroken and... this eliot doesn't know their eliot. he's wrong. he... has to be.

eliot frowns. so i trust you with everything i am but i aint in love, you aren't enough, and... and you want me to take a different path. away from y'all

hardison: it sounds awful when you say it like that.

eliot: it doesn't sound like a good situation, from where im sitting

parker: we just want you happy, eliot. even if it means we cant have you.

eliot sobers. nods. i won't promise you i will. but... i will consider it.

and that's what parker and hardison want but they are just… spooked. but so is eliot. he withdraws and says he has it from here. hardison and parker try to insist they need to help, but eliot gives them a stare down until they take the out.

after that... things are heavy. but the con is rolling along fine, and above all else, they are professionals. as the con is wrapping up, parker is planning out the last details about the gloat and she's like, we won't be there but you should... and they are like oh. yes. that.... that's gonna happen. that will be when they leave.

the con goes well until inevitably they hit a snag, so when they are gonna break up for separate parts of the con, the departure is on a much more sudden time frame than they expected. they three look at each other because they know they won't see each other again, not like this. maybe not ever again.

as parker and hardison try to find the words to leave eliot behind, eliot just sighs. i told you i would consider leaving the army but you gotta answer me and don't lie.

parker: anything

eliot: is there a time you are alive now because i was there? not... not any hitter. specifically me.

oh. tear well up in parker's eyes. not fair.

because parker thinks about a sunken cavern of ice. that one shouldn't even count, any other hitter would probably have just told her to leave the body from the beginning. parker does not care. eliot saved her in more ways than just convincing her to climb out of the cave in the end.

and hardison thinks of that second day, technically the first twenty-four hours.... thinks of eliot pulling hardison up before the warehouse blows up. maybe the choreography of the day would have meant hardison didn't fall, or maybe he did live but was injured, or maybe a million things. eliot steadied hardison, was his friend, his confidante, the one who held him first when hardison came up from the ground.

so the answer yes then?

parker: it's not that simple

eliot: why can't it be?

parker makes an unhappy sound. the time is running out. they need to get to position. now. but...

hardison holds eliot by the neck, as eliot once did him, and says. you once told me all i had to do was to show you the way and you would save the world for us. we want to show you the way to save your soul, whatever it takes, whatever happens to us, because... that's what love can look like, too. we just want what's best for you, whatever that looks like. just think about it. okay?

eliot looks like he wants to resist, but hardison squeezes desperately, trembling.

okay. i'll think about it.

hardison draws eliot close, into a hug. thank you.

eliot clutches him back. goddammit, he whispers, no explanation.

parker is there when hardison pulls back an inch. eliot hugs her too, and says into her ear, make sure he doesnt get into too much trouble without me, alright?

parker does not say anything at first. says, goodbye, eliot, with their cheeks squeezed together, that's how hard she's hugging him.

bye, park.

and so.

they part.

they finish the con, and parker and hardison are so incredibly anxious about what the repercussions are gonna be (they are willing to take them, for eliot) and also are already like, mourning eliots place in their lives because they love him

they finish out the con and they feel the tug and they get back to the present. its done. they did it.

parker and hardison are shaking and things seem similar enough, that means eliot had to have chosen them.... no, no, they can't get their hopes up.

......they had to have found a way without him. they had to, because that's what eliot would have wanted from them in exchange for his soul.

but just as they get their bearings, there's a sound just a little away. they stiffen; parker gets ready to fight. but it's...

oh.

eliot holds them close and he's like, god, it's been weeks i've been checking every day

you can't be here, hardison says

you promised you would consider it, parker says, distressed

and eliot... doesnt respond with confusion, i... knew it had to be around now if it really was you but i was never sure it was real before

parker, face tucked squarely into eliot's neck: you remember us?

i didn't or... i didn't include you in my mission report. there was no proof yall existed and then the next deployment, the very next one, they... they got me. held me for months. i was convinced yall were a fantasy to give me hope. over the years, i thought maybe, maybe it was... but no, it couldnt be. but since y'all vanished, it's been coming back. eliot's fingers dig into them where he's holding them. its been coming back, ive been remembering, and ive been here, waiting

hardison, tears flowing: we told you to go home. we warned you. you could have been okay.

eliot pulls back to meet hardison's eyes: when you left, i imagined my life if i went back. it... wouldve been nice. married to aimee, likely, but that would've never lasted. not forever. too the same, all passion and no patience. mightve gone to work for my dad. itd be comfortable. a decent life.

parker: it would have been good. safe. you would have been happy.

eliot shakes his head: i chose the army first, before you showed up. it was always gonna be what i did. i was stubborn, then, and i didnt understand the scope but i was following it to its ends.

hardison: so it was all for nothing.

eliot: no, fuck. no. you showed me a way to keep my soul, but whatever happened to it, a way i couldnt take, but i at least knew, somewhere deep inside... eliot stops, tries to untangle them.

hardison: what did you know?

eliot: i'm here that's what matters

parker: please

eliot: even then, i knew at least... my soul might be lost but i would always know where my heart was

parker: oh. you love us

of course, darlin'. eliot swallows.

you never told us

you never told me

hardison: we didnt want you to leave

eliot: i never wanted to give you a reason to push me away

parker: we're so stupid.

hardison puts his forehead to eliots. like really really stupid. you said you liked us because we are smart, but we're so dumb, man

theres so much to resolve. so much doubt, so many feelings to untangle, too many misunderstandings to air... but for now, when eliot laughs and says at least youre still pretty, and hardison huffs offended before trying to tickle eliot saying oh did you say petty? i heard petty did you hear petty parker? and parker is like, oh i think i did and they overpower eliot with tickles and ninja attacks that lead to cuddles and kisses.

and the soul-pain will always linger for eliot, that won't ever go away. not quite. but in the warmth of their silliness on a spot that once hurt so bad, there... their laughter brings something that has been there longer than eliot knew to look: a heartsong of devotion, of care, of love... and that? that wont ever go away

#eliot spencer #parker leverage #alec hardison #leverage #faorism fic #faorism work #leverage ot3 #thiefsome #whoops wrote a very rushed fic draft #posting because i wont ever clean this up so here it is #leverage redemption spoilers #leverage redemption #the crown achievement job

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amazingorangedangantrash · 8 months

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Hey how do you think Naegi would react to where Kamukura lives? It’s literally a dark and empty room with a sad excuse of a bed. Kamukura probably doesn’t care but Makoto just insists on showering him in affection after seeing that

I know this is a very old ask so please don't mind the notifications jumpscare

I think Naegi would be horrified! All the other students live in the doorms. With like... actual bedrooms, with stuff in there. And they interact with other students and their dormmates regularly.

Well i assume they live in dorms i suppose if you live nearby you wouldnt need to.

I always imagined the characters living nearby for some reason it just occured to me most of them probably dont. oop-

But yeah, Makoto would be horrified that Izuru is so isolated from everyone else. For the school's golden child, he really gets... awful treatment. Treated more like a science experiment or a prisoner than a student.

Kamukura is still.. technically a teenager, when you think about it. His age is kinda fucky, seeing as he was "concieved" in a moment, and his mind formed in another person's body, but my point still stands. No wonder he's bored all the time! For someone will all that knowledge and skill, he hasn't lived much. Especially since he spends most of his time in that dismal room. It reminds me of White Torture- when you isolate someone in an empty, all-white room, minimise human interaction, and even feed them only plain white foods.

Its enough to make enough lose it after a while, and for someone like Kamukura- who's already understimulated, it really must be an even greater torture.

I think Makoto would insist he be moved- and if that wasn't allowed, do everything he could to make the environment more enriching, or at least welcoming. String some lights up, put decorations up, get some coloured bedsheets in- maybe even paint the walls or something. There's quite a bit of room in there, so maybe put in a bean bag, a desk with a comfy chair and a lamp, a shelf for books and drawing materials. Just. Stuff, y'know? Even if it doesn't alleviate his boredom, it's better than being surrounded by nothing.

Makoto would definitely visit a lot more often too, and text more. Sleepovers aren't quite allowed (though eventually Izuru would knock out the staff and sneak over to Makoto's dorm room. But he hasn't quite gotten to that stage yet), so they can't do that, but Makoto compensates for it by video calling once a week, to every other day, to eventually more or less every day as the relationship progresses. The thought of Izuru all alone... it makes him too upset for words. He makes a lot of handmade stuff for him- think felt animals, silly little craft items.

They er- dont always turn out 100% as according to planned (think like the image below LOL) but much to the staff's bemusement he keeps them anyway. Whereas he's find the attempts pitiable in anyone else, these spark a strange feeling of warmth in him, and when he falls asleep, it's with an oddly pleasant buzz in his chest.

#i apologise for taking so long to get around to this ask #but tysm for it!#makoto naegi #izuru kamukura #kamuegi #my post

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icedmetaltea · 4 months

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I've been feeling discouraged about my art recently. Could you possibly give me some tips?

Ok I wanna preface this by saying I am by no means a professional or even "good" artist, BUT I shall try!

These are all tips by a digital artist so I can't help much when it comes to other forms

This got long so under the cut, 20 ART TIPS TIME LETS GOOO

1.Try to draw most days, or at least once a week. The more often the better BUT I don't mean like hardcore, a complex drawing every single day (recipe for burnout right there). I mean like even just 30 seconds of SOMETHING. You can draw shapes, maybe fill a page with circles. There are programs u can find online that give you like a min to sketch something and challenge yourself in a really short time frame. Guess what?? When you draw often you're building those neural pathways (I think) and the more you do it the easier it'll get

2. Don't obsess over making stuff look perfect on the first draft... or at all. I recommend making a "draft" layer or 2... or 3 over the initial sketch. The more you go over it and change stuff, the better it'll be. Also, If you spend hours on it and still hate it?? Who cares! You put in the work and now you have an idea out on paper that you can go over some time in the future and improve if you chose to.

3. DON'T DELETE STUFF!!! Unless it's literally just mindless scribbles, save everything you draw. Like I said, you can go over it again and improve it someday. You can also look back at it in like a year and compare your art to see where you've improved! I deleted all my old art from beyond like a year ago and regret it so much. Don't berate yourself for the stuff you need to work on, be proud of what improvements you've still made

USE REFERENCES!!!!!!! Please just do it, I know it's annoying but I promise it helps so so much

4. Invest drawing tablet, preferably one with buttons that you can map to undo, sketch, fill and such. This will make drawing sooooo much easier (and faster). My quality of art has improved just from drawing the same thing and redoing it like 20 times at a time, and it takes way less time when I can just click a button to do that. It might seem daunting at first but it quickly becomes instinctual. This is the one I got and I'm quite happy with it! It's got good sensitivity, a pen you don't have to replace batteries for or even recharge, and it's mid-range so not wayy too expensive. However, if you're just starting out, I'd recommend this (I got the corded version but I assume it's about the same) since it's small, cheap and you can focus on just learning basics like improving lines n such.

5. Use a bigger canvas size. I started out with 1000x1000, and that's still fine for smaller stuff and doodles, for better quality I recommend bigger sizes. If it's too small it'll look all weird and pixel-y

6. THERE ARE LITERALLY SO MANY FORMS OF ART, maybe the one you're trying just isn't something you vibe with! There's mosaics, digital, traditional (and all the many sub-categories of that), sculpture, photography, etc. All are equally valid and you will improve in your craft if you choose something that 1. you enjoy, 2. are consistent with it!

7. SEGEMENT OUT THE LIMBS drawing DCA stuff for over a year has helped me improve on anatomy sooo much literally just because it forced me to think of each part of a limb in terms of segments, shapes- for instance, instead of an upper arm, I think of a tube which connects to a circle that allows it to rotate and another tube... followed by a weird shape for a hand that connects 5 smaller tubes, whiCH ARE THEN SEPERATED IN TO 3 TUBES EACH. Yes it sounds confusing but breaking it down like that instead of just trying to figure things out helped an absolute shitton

8. Have some kinda hobby that makes you draw frequently. For instance I have a discord sona I draw a new pfp for every month or so. It's a simple design and since the pfp won't show many flaws I can pump out lots of art for it in a small timeframe and I find it relaxing. I've actually improved a shitton just drawing pfps This is one of my first pfps from maybe 2 yrs ago compared with one of my most recent ones

(yes I'm a bit of a furry deal with it) It's cute, there's nothing wrong at all with it! However, you can see how things have changed.

See how the lines are a lot more even, less jagged? The proportions of the shoulders are much wider, the ears aren't just popping out of the hair, the shading makes a bit more sense and isn't just thrown around at random. There's also a broader range of color, with a few bright highlights to catch the eye, colored shading I think as well. The former is just like 3 simple colors. These are all things I learned from drawing pfps consistently.

9. CONSISTENCY IS KEY!! And FUN, if you have fun drawing it'll be a lot easier to do frequently

10. Whether it's drawing pfps, blorbos or landscapes, find something that brings you joy and it'll be MUCH easier to stick to. Draw, draw a lot, do not worry about "good" art and "bad" art cause there's literally no such thing. Compare what you draw now with what you do in like a year or two from now and I promise, if you're consistent, use references and are patient, you WILL amaze yourself with how much you improve.

11. Challenge yourself! Join secret santas (assuming you know you can complete it within the allotted timeframe), draw your friends' sona/ocs (if they're cool with it), do palette challenges, do monthly stuff like drawtober or whatever it's called (BUT I don't recommend doing something every single day for a month cause again, gonna cause mega burnout)

12. Draw when the inspiration comes, it will move your hand. These days I make much better quality art that I'm proud of when I just let inspiration flow through me instead of begrudgingly making myself draw. You shouldn't be forcing yourself!! If you are, you probably are burned out by either drawing too much, feeling a lack of confidence or some other stuff going on irl. Inspiration comes naturally, and when it doesn't it's prolly your mind trying to communicate that something's up. If resting a week or two doesn't help, take a deeper look at your life and see if the artblock is a symptom of something else (for me it's most often depression).

13. At the same time, sometimes you just need to start. Kinda on the previous point of lacking confidence, often we scare ourselves out of even trying. It might feel insurmountable. Nah, try. If all you can do is a wobbly, vague sketch?? You got the idea out!! Start drawing fuckin eyeballs or something, just start. Sometimes the hardest part is just facing a blank canvas and putting a couple lines on it

14. Not all brushes are equal. Some just make drawing easier- at least for me. I dunno the science behind it but when I use my sketch brush (it's got a similar look to pencil) rather than my lineart brush it makes drawings just... look better. Also using thicker lines in general helps. Why?? NO CLUE, maybe thinner ones just show flaws easier or intersect better or something.

15. Music or some other distraction can help, idk why. Some days I like to have a movie/show/podcast going in the background for a mild distraction that keeps me slightly stimulated on other stuff even as I draw- maybe it increases brain activity or??? No idea. Sometimes just listening to music. Sometimes I need total silence. Do what works for you! Give lots of different stuff a try, you may love drawing while listening to a podcast in the background

16. Take breaks!! The pomodoro method works with art as well. Every 25 mins or so, take a 5 min break. Get up, stretch, get some water, maybe watch a yt vid. Call ur friend and tell them you love and cherish them. Then get back to it and you will feel oh so refreshed. After maybe 3 rounds take a 15 min or longer break and then repeat if you still feel like it

17. SLEEP IS INCREDIBLY FUCKING IMPORTANT you will see a deep decline in the quality of your art when you're tired, plus you just feel like shit and art is about feeling good and expressing yourself. Sleep is important, even tho yes I stay up too late drawing most nights, I do my absolute best to get at least 7 hours of sleep every night, as should you!!

18. DO NOT BE SCARED OF STICK FIGURES AND MESSY SKETCHES, they're actually the best way to start bc 1. it's a quick way to get an idea out before you forget it 2. the finished piece will actually look a lot more fluid since you weren't spending all that time obsessing over making the first draft look perfect- which often just makes it look stiff. You can do a whole lot with stick figures. Focus on that good ol' line of action.

19. Random but when drawing the face, I like to first make a circle and then like a "mask" over it for the actual face. For me it just makes sense. Then two lines, one up/down and one left, right, it'll make it easier to align the eyes and ears. In general, the ears usually go where the "mask" begins and just below the left/right line

20. Finally surround yourself with people who encourage you. I grew up in an environment where people would gawk at stuff my sibling drew and ignore me bc they were ~naturally talented~ and it made me not want to draw at all.

Well guess what?? Now that I spend time with people who encourage me and genuinely care about my interest in art I've improved a lot bc I have the motivation, the joy of showing ppl who care about me new pieces. If people in your life aren't encouraging you, or gods forbid insulting your art (excluding constructive criticism that you've explicitly asked for) then TOSS EM OVERBOARD THE BOAT OF LIFE and find people who will treat you with the love and respect you deserve

P.S

This isn't a tip, just a recommendation: Chicory, a colorful tale. It's a game where u play as a cute lil dog who gets a magical paintbrush that lets you color the world. The only issue? You have no ~talent~. My gods, this game struck a cord with me.

Feeling like you don't have any talents that come naturally to you. Being overlooked even when you try your best. Feeling like a complete joke when you try to pick up the brush (or in this case stylus) because there are so many "real" artists and you're not one of them.

Also the things people say and how they can affect you even when not intentional. Damn. It's just a beautiful game. It's made by the same people who made Wandersong, another absolute banger game with a character who is seen as a joke and I cannot recommend them enough.

bonus tip bc why the fuck not: OVERLAYS!!!!!!! In clip paint studio you have all these layer options, I can never memorize what they all do so I just make like an ombre color layer over my base colors and try all of them to see what looks cool

#Answer tag #Metaltea Talks #ref #art tips #long post #*gives anon a thousand tiny cartoon hearts in a bottle*

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