#now let me tag so this finds the right people

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

End Game 1

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, stalking, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Your gaming buddy asks to meet up but it doesn't go exactly as planned.

Characters: Andy Barber

Note: get ready for the hate.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

The tunnel lights up ahead of you, revealing the cubic rock walls as you plant torches in your stead. The eerie soundtrack of night time and the ominous groan of zombies looming somewhere in the cave have you uptight. Silently, you press on, digging and mining mindlessly, fingers mashing the buttons on your controller. 

“Hey, where are you?” Jacob’s voice startles you. 

You nearly forgot you’re playing co-op. You sniff and shake your head, cursing aloud as your shock has you succumbing to the arrow of a sneaky skeleton. You sigh as your possessions scatter and you spawn back in your bed. 

“Back home,” you say glumly, “just ate it.” 

“Ah, damn,” his deep voice rolls in your noise-cancelling headset, “sorry, hope that wasn’t me.” 

“No, I wasn’t paying attention,” you hum and sigh.  

“Ah,” he accepts and lets silence linger before he clicks his tongue, “what’s going on? Everything alright?” 

“Yeah, yeah,” you put the controller down, your avatar sitting on the geometric bed, “I just...” you stretch your neck and massage your scalp around the thick band of the headset, “got a lot on my mind.” 

“Right. I thought you were all done exams,” he says. 

“I am, but... packing. Going home. I called my old boss and turns out I’m not gonna have a job this summer. Gotta start over,” you yawn and rub your eyes, “what about you? Final exam tomorrow?” 

“Uh... yeah,” he hesitates as if he forgot. You do wonder why he isn’t cramming right now. You could never play minecraft all night the day before a final. “Easy stuff. I’m not worried.” 

You scoff. You wish you could say the same. All you’ve done is worry those last two weeks. Exams, getting home, getting a job. Your grandmother won’t very happy to find out you’ll be slumming it for a while. At least you tucked away some money through the semester. 

“Hey, if you need a few bucks...” Jacob offers. 

“What? Are you crazy? No way,” you exclaim, “really, no, I couldn’t. I’ll be fine. I just... I hate looking for jobs. You know how it is. Friggin awkward.” 

“It’s not a big deal. My dad sent me my birthday money so...” 

“Uh uh,” you deny him again, “that’s way too much. I couldn’t-- we haven’t even met.” 

“Mm, yeah, about that,” he exhales into his microphone, “I, uh, got an extra ticket to this Con. I figured out that’s it like the midway point between us so...” 

“A con? Oh, wow--” 

“Yeah, but I get that it would be expensive so maybe I could pay for your trip?” 

“Jacob,” you wiggle the controller restlessly, “I can't accept that. It’s so nice but... it’s a lot.” 

“I wouldn’t offer it was too much,” his voice is soft, meek, and defeated. You feel bad but you would feel worse taking advantage of his kindness. “We’ve been talking all year. I just figured it would be a good chance to meet up. It would be in public and something we both like so...” 

You scratch your neck as it speckles with heat. You don’t know what’s more insulting; yes or no. 

“Can I think about it?” You ask thinly. 

The line is quiet. You look at the screen and it goes dim from your idling. You hit the analog stick and fix your headphones. 

“Jacob?” You murmur. 

“Sure, think about it,” he says, his voice raspy and rocky. It’s strange. You’ve seen him in pictures and his voice doesn’t really match his appearance. He sounds a lot older than he looks. “It’s next month so lots of time.” 

“I’m sorry,” you cringe. “I just wouldn’t want to waste your money.” 

“Trust me, it wouldn’t be a waste,” he insists, “this last year has sucked. So much. You got me through it all.” His microphone scuffs, “studying, exams, all that stuff. It’s tough making new friends. Seems like everyone here knows each other from high school.” 

“Yeah, totally,” you agree.  

You’re not exactly the most popular person. You have people you know in each class but not too many friends you hang out with outside the lecture hall or library. So far, not too many people want to spend hours mining digital gold or racing cartoon characters around a rainbow track. 

“Well, you should probably get some sleep,” you yawn, “you got your big exam and... I gotta keep packing. Gotta catch the greyhound tomorrow night.” 

“Sure, uh, yeah, right,” his disappointment is potent, “hey, will you text me when you get home? Just so I know you made it.” He snorts, “god, I sound like my dad right now.” 

“Oh, of course,” you chirp back, “I’ll try to remember. Might be late.” 

“That’s fine. Just as long as you let me know.” 

“Don’t worry about me,” you assure him, “not ‘til I have to face my grandma. Ha.” 

“Yeah, good luck with that,” he says, “well... er...” 

“Good night,” you finish for him, “let me know how the exam goes too.” 

“Will do,” his timbre gets even lower, “night.” 

You sign off and shut down the console. Another yawn flows through you and waters in your eyes. You should sleep, you got a long day waiting for you, but you know it won’t be easy. Not with so much on your mind, not least of all, Jacob’s invitation. 

🎮

You text Jacob as you get on the bus, to make sure he doesn’t worry. It’s so sweet that he does, even some of your girlfriends don’t bother that much. Not that you mind the ‘hey, bitch’ Janet sends you every now and again to make sure you’re still alive. 

You fall asleep on the bus. You’ve never been one to sleep while travelling but you’re exhausted from a night of anxious tossing and turning. After spending all day packing up the last of your things and scouring your dorm room, you’re beat to hell. 

It’s midnight as you get to your grandmother’s house. She’s up reading another Stephen King classic in her rocking chair. She’s always been a night owl and a voracious book hound. She grumbles at you but doesn’t bother to ask how your trip was. 

“Hey, grandma,” you hike up your bag and smile.  

She growls again, eyes not leaving the page. You should know better by now not to interrupt her. You shoulder on and head down to the spare room where you spent most of your high-school career. You shut the door gently as the old hardwood floors creak with your weight and you drop your bag on the squeaky bed. 

You fish out your phone and plug it in as the battery flashes red with only two percent left. You leave it on the night table and stretch out, not bothering to change out of your hoodie and jeans. It’s not long before you descend back into the same dreams that marked your journey home. 

You wake up to buzzing. Your phone shakes the nightstand, rattling it against the bed frame. You groan and roll onto your side, reaching blindly for offending object. You hit the side button to dismiss the call.  

You blink away the bleariness and focus on the screen. Along with the missed call are several text messages. You squint as you expand the notifications. Jacob! You forgot to message. 

‘Hey, you home?’ 

‘Checking in. Must be busy getting settled in. Just let me know when you’re safe.’ 

‘Not meaning to be weird but everything okay?’ 

‘Please answer me. I’m worried.’ 

You drag your thumb around the keyboard, letting it predict your words; ‘sorry! I was so tired. Home now and safe 😊' 

Three dots pop up then swoop away. You frown as the same thing happens several times before a response appears. 

‘Was really worried. Thanks for finally answering. Been up all night.’ 

You’re stunned by the terse response. Yeah, you forgot to answer but he doesn’t need to worry that much. You frown and shift onto your side. 

‘Srry again. Tired. Talk in morning. Night.’ 

You turn your phone on silent and plug it back into the cord. You do feel bad but you’re too exhausted to let it keep you up. Besides, you need your sleep. You have lots of job hunting to do in the morning. Not to mention, your grandmother to face. 

🎮

You let Jacob cool down after your return home. Rather, he doesn’t text and you’re too distracted to do the same. As much as you’d like to sit around and game, your grandmother was as disappointed as you expected with your employment status, even when you gave her the money you had left in your emergency fund. 

After a week, you finally get a bite. It’s nothing special. There’s a seasonal ice cream shop in a booth shaped like a vanilla cone that needs a cashier on weeknights. It’s less than full time hours but it’s better than nothing. It will be strange working with high school juniors but you can’t afford to be picky. 

‘Game tonight?’ The text interrupts your first shift. You don’t have a chance to answer as a family approaches the window to order. 

You get them the soft serve and take their payment, bidding them a good evening with their vanilla points already drooping in the summer heat. You glance around at the mostly empty picnic tables. Soccer practice will end soon and you’ll be overloaded with eight-year-olds. 

‘Srry. New job. 1st shift. Maybe tmrw.’ 

‘New job? Congrats. Why didn’t you tell me?’ 

You sigh.  

‘Time got ahead of me.’ 

‘Same. Catch up tomorrow then. Minecraft?’ 

‘Sure. Tmrw.’ 

You slip your phone away. A mother and daughter approach and ask for a sundae and a banana split. As much as you love ice cream, working with it hasn’t tested your cravings very much. In fact, you might be falling out of love with it. The smell of vanilla and overly sweetened strawberries is kind of gross when it’s all you breathe. 

As you watch the happy customers walk away, you smile. Maybe it will be good to get some mining done. It will take your mind off of everything else. Hell, it might even make you feel like you’re doing something useful. 

🎮

“Shit, oh, sorry,” Jacob corrects himself. You always think it's kind of funny how he doesn’t like to swear. “My diamond armor.” 

“Oh no,” you utter, “where are you? I’ll grab your stuff.” 

He gives his coordinates and you turn around, leaping over the green blocks to make your way there. Despite your reticence at the beginning, you’re feeling better about the session. He wasn’t as tense as he seemed in his texts. 

“So, uh, did you think about the con?” Jacob asks. 

“The con? I almost forgot. When is it?” 

He gives the dates and you hum. Your chest flutters at the thought still. You’re not stupid. Meeting people IRL is not like online, no matter how many hours you’ve mined together. As much as you enjoy chatting with Jacob, you don’t know about meeting up. 

“I get it if you can’t get the time off but my offer still stands to cover the trip. If you wanna stay the night, I’ll even get an airBnB.” 

“Oh, wow, that’s a lot. I’m working now. I could put in,” you offer.  

“Is that a yes?” He asks hopefully. 

“I don’t know... I mean, I’ll have to look into it,” you say evasively. “Talk to my boss and grandma and all that.” 

“Right, right,” he tries to sound unbothered, “makes sense. Of course, no pressure. How about I send you the ticket either way? Haven’t got anyone else to bite.” 

“Oh, well, hold off, I wouldn’t want to take it and not use it,” you collect his weapons and armor from the ground in the game. 

It’s silent as you focus on getting every little thing. 

“Sorry, did I freak you out?” He asks, “I’m really not trying to pressure you, just got excited thinking about it.” 

“I know, Jacob, it’s not that, it’s just... a lot.” 

“Totally get it,” he intones, “let me know whenever you got an answer. Uh, where are you? I’m tryna find you.” 

“Just stay there, I'll come back to the house,” you assure him, happy to focus on the game instead. 

Still, you can’t entirely lose yourself in it. You’re sure he’s a nice guy. From pictures, he’s less than scary, and he’s never been anything but friendly. It’s not like the other dudes you meet online who jump to asking about your bra size and all that. It just isn’t smart. 

Well, maybe if you don’t show up alone. You know what con he’s talking about and Kara from Econ lives near there. You could probably convince her to meet up. Hm, that might work. 

Just like you told him, you’ll have to think about it. 

#andy barber #dark andy barber #dark!andy barber #andy barber x reader #fic #dark fic #dark!fic #end game #series #defending jacob

[sunafc]

accidentally in love - 17, single

taglist: @writing-for-the-hell-of-it @gigiiiiislife @phoenix-eclipses @needtoloveoutloud @azharyy @dearneverland @sleepystrwbrryy @oliwiasworlds @iluv-ace @rrosiitas @staygoldsquatchling02 @p4ndawrites @stayyyyyyyyyyyy21 @loveliepa @nnnyxie @iluvaquaphor @juliluvhz @kodzuken-hoe @luvvmae @sunset-venuz

if u want to be added to the taglist just let me know in the comments ! !

Right now you are going to the college library, Oikawa offered to help you study for your linguistics exam. He’s right beside you and your fingers brush against each other’s as you walk. This is nice, you think. Over the past few weeks you and Oikawa had spent a lot of time together. It felt natural to be part of each other’s lives. You wanted to introduce him to your friends, as you had just met his own.

Oikawa tugs at your hand, ‘Are you listening to me?’

‘Sorry,’ you look down at your hands, interlaced together, ‘What did you say?’

He smiles softly at you, ‘Do you want to grab dinner together, later?’

Oikawa doesn’t let go of your hand and you come to realize you enjoy that. His skin is really soft. He tugs at you again, noticing you’re getting lost in your thoughts once more.

‘Sure,’ you nod smiling back at him.

He holds the door to the library open for you and then follows you in. You spend a few minutes looking for the books you need before finding a free table.

You chose to study in the library because you knew if you studied at home you would get somehow distracted, though it seems the library isn’t really helping you. You’re finding it very difficult to concentrate when Oikawa is sitting next to you and his thigh presses against yours under the table. You keep reading the same sentence over and over again but the words have no meaning. You can’t stop thinking about how the last couple weeks have felt like dating, rumors even started going around campus about you two. But you don’t need a boyfriend, that’s what you settled on. You let out a deep sigh and read that sentence once more.

Once you’re done reading the chapter Oikawa lends you some flash cards, ‘I made these when I took this exam, I thought maybe they could help you.’

‘Thanks,’ you smile.

He pats your head ‘You seem a little out of it,’ his fingers run through your hair, ‘Are you alright?’

You open your mouth to reply, already thinking of the usual answer Just tired, but you stop when you notice two girls making their way towards your table. Oikawa’s hand in your hair drops to your thigh as he turns to them.

‘Hey,’ one of the girls says, fidgeting with her hands. Oh, you already have a feeling of what is about to happen and the air around you starts feeling really cold.

‘Are you single, Oikawa?’ She finally asks.

He nervously looks at you and you’re not sure how to read his face. He looks back at the girl. Your stomach is in a knot, he is single, you two are not dating. She’s really pretty, too. You don’t want to be there when he answers her, you quickly gather your things under the confused gaze of Oikawa.

His grip on your thigh tightens ‘Y/n?’

You move his hand, ‘Sorry I–’ you get up, ‘I need to go,’ you walk towards the exit without even thinking about making up some excuse. Your heart is racing, your hands are tingling, it’s hard to swallow and you’re feeling anxious, worried, sad... is this jealousy? This is all my fault, you want to be mad at Oikawa but this was really all your doing. You did exactly what you told him not to do so, really, you can only be mad at yourself. You shake your head as your vision starts to get blurry because of the tears forming in the corner of your eyes.

notes:

well well well, if these aren't the consequences of y/n's own actions... ops

anyways!

things will get better next chapter.. maybe😋

for the people who asked to be added to the taglist but don't see their names: tumblr won't let me tag u for some reason so i'm sorry abt that 🙁

previous - masterlist - next

#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu smau #haikyuu x you #oikawa smau #oikawa tooru #oikawa x reader #haikyuu oikawa #hq

[balteredsworld]

cha cha chase, gregory house

🥼🩺 | house finds out you're a dancer.

tags! house being house, fluff of sorts? house x reader def

。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°

"aww that's cute," house tilted his head in amusement, eyes twinkling with signature mischief. you were going to hate this. in fact, you were already dreading it. "we can all give foreman a lap dance."

you rolled your eyes, prepping your dearest ex-friend's arm for a transfusion. "did you have to say all that?"

"what? people should know you were a dancer, especially with a boss like that," she sweetly and very innocently shrugged, before looking at house with pride. "she's got killer mo—"

"—alright!" you jammed the needle roughly, shutting her up. "you'll fall asleep in right about... now."

she dozed off, but not before catching you with a triumphant frown about your lips. oh you were pissed, at least she didn't need to deal with it until after the treatment.

you would've cooled down by then. but you were also in trouble. why? because of that stupid grin house had on his stupid face.

"so you used to dance."

"and you used to walk."

"ouch. low blow!"

"i can blow even lower." the words left your mouth sooner than you could think.

"you definitely have the knees for it," house chuckled, practically looking up into heaven with an extremely exaggerated grateful look.

"shut up. don't ask."

his brows shot up, face contorting a theatrical face of an innocent. "how could you assume the worst in me!"

"my bad," you deadpanned. "i think it's just your track record with insanely inappropriate jokes."

you slipped swiftly out of the room, keen to get house off of your hair. but for a cripple, he was insanely fast. this man could do more than he let out, but that was only to make people like yourself, his victim-of-the-day fellow, miserable.

house was a smart man, but his aptitude was used for the worst. nothing was a viable escape, he was going to hold this over you until the day you die.

"i ask first," he snarked, making a gesture with his finger. "uhm, i have something inappropriate to say. can i say it?"

you glared at him over your shoulder. he was hot on your trail. if only you could get to the flight of stairs quicker.

he blinked all cutesy, innocently batting his lashes as you two turned the corner. "were you a stripper?"

you threw your head back, eyes rolling back to the point it felt like someone was gauging them out. house looked excited at the prospect. even if you weren't, close enough.

finally, you turn to him with an unimpressed purse about your lips and an angry furrow to your brows. house towered over you, all but amused at your well invited and justified anger. he thought it was cute.

"so?" he cocked a brow, still twinkling in mischief.

"answer's no," you half-calmly answered, titling your head, formulating a wicked idea.

you grabbed house's wrinkled collar, standing on your tip toes, snaking your hand on his shoulders.

"but i am a dancer," you whispered, mustering a sickeningly sweet voice. you trailed your fingers along his neck, letting your breath fan his ear as you crooned your head slightly, just as how you would with your dance partner.

some part of you had a daring inkling to knock his cane over, still unnerved over his shenanigans that last christmas he duped you into getting him a pricey gift.

fortunately for house, you weren't him.

but you maintained your hold on him, before letting out a hum at the same time you descended back to the soles of your foot. an innocent smile creeping on your lips, lashes batting the same way he'd done seconds ago.

"that's right, dancer..." house trailed, with a gaping mouth, still in a childish drawl.

"doctor, actually. the id says m.d., but thanks," you remarked nonchalantly, whipping away in a spin to dash into your escape. "you hired me remember?"

"because you had nice legs!" house shouted in a last ditch effort to win, seemingly paralyzed on the spot. "and even nicer knees!"

you had outrun him for now, although you knew it wasn't long before he revived into an ever meaner bloom. and you were right to dread it, because hours later, house was sitting with a triumphant smirk about his face. he somehow found a video of you dancing embarrassingly online, no doubt with the help of lucas, and forwarded it to any and all.

that only strengthened your resolve for revenge. house was fucked, but he welcomed your challenge.

who knows? maybe he could just get a lap dance out of it.

#greg house x reader #house md x reader #house md #dr house #gregory house x reader #gregory house fic #gregory house #netflix #hugh laurie #gregory house x you

[theodorenmyth]

Okay! So if you know Hogwarts legacy, y’know the character Ominis right? Blind Slytherin who uses his wand to navigate around Hogwarts? So what if m!reader was like that with Theo and mattheo. Like those two would be like worried like “you sure you’re okay to walk aro—” and then reader is like “I’m VERY much capable…thank you.” Even if they’re blind they are still a powerful Slytherin!

-🧚🏾‍♀️

The Eyes of the Serpent

Pairings : None - maybe T.N, M.R X M!R? Summary : In Hogwarts, you, a blind but powerful Slytherin, navigate the castle with the help of your wand and keen intuition. Despite your independence, Theo Nott and Mattheo Riddle often express concern for your safety. One day, as you head to the library to find a book on advanced potion-making, Theodore and Mattheo accompany you. They express their admiration for your abilities and offer their support. You explain your intention to perfect a potion that enhances magical abilities temporarily. With their encouragement and presence, you feel empowered, knowing that true strength lies within and that you can overcome any obstacle with the support of your friends. A/n : Enjoy (⁠・⁠∀⁠・⁠) Warnings) : Nothing! Word count : 800+

You stride confidently down the dimly lit corridors of Hogwarts, your wand held loosely in your hand, the tip emitting a faint, pulsing glow. Each step you take is precise, guided by the soft hum of magic that resonates within the ancient stone walls. Despite your blindness, you move with the assured grace of someone who knows every inch of the castle by heart.

"Are you sure you’re okay to walk around alone?" Theodore's voice cuts through the silence, a mix of concern and curiosity lacing his words.

You stop and turn towards the sound, your lips curling into a wry smile. "I'm VERY much capable, thank you," you reply, the edge in your tone unmistakable. "I've been navigating these halls long before you two started worrying."

Mattheo chuckles softly beside Theodore, his voice warm and teasing. "You tell him, mate. It's not like a little thing like blindness can stop a Slytherin."

"Exactly," you say, resuming your walk. Theodore and Mattheo fall into step beside you, their presence comforting despite your fierce independence.

"Still," Theodore murmurs, his voice softer now, "we can't help but worry. Hogwarts isn't exactly the safest place, even for those who can see."

You tilt your head slightly, acknowledging his concern without giving in to it. "I appreciate it, Theo. Really. But you need to understand—magic isn't just about what you can see. It's about what you can feel, what you can sense. My wand guides me, but so does my intuition."

Mattheo nudges you playfully. "And let's not forget you're one of the most powerful Slytherins in our year. We'd be fools to think you couldn't handle yourself."

"Glad to see someone remembers," you quip, your smile widening. "Besides, I have you two as backup if anything goes wrong."

Theodore snorts. "As if you'd ever need us."

You reach out, your fingers brushing against the cool stone of the wall, feeling the intricate carvings that tell tales of Hogwarts' long history. "You know, Theo, sometimes it's not about need. It's about knowing you have people who care."

For a moment, there's a comfortable silence between you. The three of you continue walking, the ambient sounds of Hogwarts—distant laughter, the rustle of robes, the echo of footsteps—enveloping you.

"So, what's on the agenda today?" Mattheo asks, breaking the silence.

You mumble something and made the tip of your wand glow red, the soft pulse guiding you forward. "I was thinking of heading to the library. There's a book on advanced potion-making I want to get my hands on."

Theo raises an eyebrow, his curiosity piqued. "Planning on brewing something special?"

You nod, your expression thoughtful. "Something like that. I have a few ideas I want to experiment with."

"Sounds intriguing," Mattheo says, his interest evident. "Mind if we tag along? Could be fun."

You chuckle, the sound light and genuine. "Sure, why not? Just don't get in my way when I'm working."

Theo smirks. "Wouldn't dream of it."

As you approach the library, you feel a subtle shift in the air, the familiar scent of old parchment and ink reaching your senses. Madam Pince's watchful presence is a comforting constant, her sharp eyes missing nothing.

"Good afternoon, Madam Pince," you greet her, your voice respectful yet confident.

She gives a curt nod, her tone brisk but not unkind. "Afternoon. Here for another book, I presume?"

"Yes, ma'am. Advanced potion-making."

She nods, her footsteps soft as she leads you to the correct section. You can hear Theo and Mattheo trailing behind, their whispers barely audible.

"Here you go," Madam Pince says, placing the heavy tome into your hands. The weight is reassuring, a promise of knowledge and power.

"Thank you," you reply, your fingers tracing the embossed letters on the cover.

"Just be careful with it," she warns, her tone softening slightly. "It's an old book."

"I will," you promise, turning to leave.

Theodore and Mattheo flank you once more as you make your way to a quiet corner of the library. You sit down, the large table offering ample space for your work. They take seats opposite you, their curiosity palpable.

"So, what's the plan?" Mattheo asks, leaning forward.

You open the book, your fingers gliding over the pages as you read the Braille notes you've meticulously added to your books over the years. "There's a potion I've been working on. It's supposed to enhance magical abilities temporarily. I want to perfect it."

Theodore whistles lowly. "Ambitious. I like it."

Mattheo grins. "Count us in. Anything you need, just say the word."

You smile, a rare softness in your expression. "Thanks, guys. It means a lot."

As you begin your work, the familiar hum of magic filling the air, you can't help but feel grateful. Despite your blindness, despite the challenges, you have friends who believe in you, who stand by you. And with their support, there's nothing you can't achieve.

In the end, it's not about what you can or cannot see. It's about the strength within, the determination to rise above any obstacle. And as a powerful Slytherin, you have that in spades.

#slytherin #slytherin boys #slytherin x reader #slytherin boys imagine #slytherin boys x reader #slytherin boys react #theodorenmyth #harry potter x you #harry potter x reader #harry potter fanfiction #hp fanfic #hp fanfiction #harry potter fandom #harry potter #harry potter x male reader #hp x male reader #male reader #hp fic #hp #theodore nott x male reader #theodore nott imagines #theo nott x reader #theodore nott x reader #theodore nott imagine #theodore nott #theodore nott x you #mattheo riddle x you #mattheo riddle fluff #mattheo riddle imagine #mattheo riddle x reader

[gravehags]

my love mine all mine

Pairing: Cumulus x f!reader (ghoul bicycle reader)

Rating: EXPLICIT, MDNI

Tags: hurt/comfort, self esteem issues, self worth issues, crying, vibrators, dildos, lovey dovey emotions, praise

Words: 3,674

Summary: You never wanted any of them to see you like this but if they had to, you're glad it's Cumulus.

a/n: hello yes this is definitely a normal smut fic that i did NOT project my personal issues into thank you very much

You’ve been quiet recently. In one of your moods.

You have no reason to be - by all accounts you should be overjoyed with your current situation. As of yesterday, the last of your things have been moved into your new room and your lovers (all ten of them) have been wonderful and affectionate. Which leads you to where you are now - standing alone, naked, in front of your full length mirror eyeing yourself with disdain. Despite your move into the ghoul den now being complete, you still don’t feel as if you belong here. It’s not your lovers that have made you feel that way - quite the contrary - but your own mind. Wondering what they see in someone like you. You’re an unremarkable sibling and, you think as you squeeze at your generous belly and hips, there are far more attractive people at the abbey who deserve to be in your position. Why did they like you so much? Tears well in your eyes as you scoff and sniffle, angry at your own ungratefulness. When there’s a knock at your door, your brain wildly jumps to the conclusion that it’s the ghouls - ready to tell you they changed their mind and they don’t want you anymore. A harsh sob escapes you and you double over.

“Honey? Are you okay? I’m coming in.”

Through blurred vision you see the figure of Cumulus in her white silk nightgown open the door and step in, quickly shutting it behind her when she sees the state you’re in. She rushes over to you, wrapping her arms around you as your weight falls heavy onto her. Your sobs are fierce and wet and you move to collapse onto the rug below you but the ghoulette catches you and steers you over to your bed. Her gentleness as she sets you down and grabs your calves to swing your feet onto the duvet only makes you cry harder. She abandons your side only for a moment to round the bed and climb in. She pulls you close, pushing your hair away from your face until the two of you are a breath apart. 

“Babylove, what’s going on, huh? You’ve been so quiet we’ve all been worried about you.”

When you open your mouth to speak, a horrible wail comes out instead and she pulls away momentarily to reach behind her and grab the box of tissues off the nightstand. 

“It’s alright, it’s alright honey,” she reaches down to pull the soft blue blanket up over the both of you, “You cry as much as you need to. I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere.”

So you do just that.

You’re not sure how long it takes for you to run dry of tears, but true to her word, Cumulus stays by your side catching all of them with a soggy tissue. When she holds a fresh one up to your nose and commands you to “blow” you bark out a hoarse laugh which makes her smile. Your head is pounding.

“Alright, so what’s going on, love? And don’t say ‘nothing’ because what I just witnessed was not nothing.”

You let out a ragged sigh.

“I hate myself,” you begin, figuring bluntness is the only way this is going to feel better, “I hate my body. Hate what I see in the mirror. I don’t see why you and the others care about me, want me…find me attractive. There are other siblings who deserve–”

“Stop.”

The hardness in Cumulus’ voice is something you’ve never heard before and it shocks you so much you hiccup. She looks at you with deadly seriousness but when your eyes begin to well with tears once again her gaze softens and she reaches her hand up to stroke your cheek.

“My love, despite the horrible lies your brain has convinced you of, you are special. Beautiful. We’ve always told you that, right?”

You nuzzle into your pillow.

“I know you have and…” you sigh again, rubbing your eyes, “like you said it’s my stupid brain. I know what you guys tell me but that little fucking gremlin inside me doesn’t. It just tells me you guys are being kind or taking pity on me.”

Cumulus hums in her throat and her eyes look sad.

“Let me tell you something about ghouls,” she begins, scooting closer to you, “We don’t establish a pack until we’re summoned but many ghouls find their mates prior to that point, in the pit. None of us did and as much as we all care for one another we always knew there was a piece missing. Did you know I saw you first? You were front row for a ritual and even from my spot at the keyboard I noticed you. You just had a…a vibe. Gave me butterflies. I told the others after the show. Then when Bug and Rora were summoned we waited to see if they would latch onto you like we did - it was almost instantaneous. When you were asked to assist us with moving boxes in the rehearsal room that day where we first asked if you wanted to hang out? No accident. We requested you, specifically. Sathanas, we were all so scared of…well scaring you away.”

“Dew was the first one to talk to me,” you murmur, with a smile. Cumulus huffs out a laugh.

“Yeah, we were all hoping he wouldn’t say anything too uh…caustic.”

You giggle.

“He complimented my rosary,” you say softly, “you know, my garnet and gold one? Told me it was sick because the beads look like blood drops. I never forgot the way he smiled at me when I laughed.”

“He’s charming, when he wants to be,” Cumulus chuckles.

“He’s a sweetheart,” you counter, “He’s all bark.”

The ghoulette gives you a doubtful look.

“You didn’t see him with that sister who insulted y–”

Your jaw drops a little as she cuts herself off and shakes her head.

“Anyway,” she continues gently, carefully sidestepping the murderous nature of her pack, “right from the get-go we all knew you were the one. After Swiss got to you well…we hoped the pieces would fall into place. And we fucked it up…Satan knows we fucked it up a few times but now that you’re here? With us? Darling, it’s everything. You are everything. Our missing piece.”

You smile at her and when you get teary eyed again she swiftly leans in and kisses your cheek.

“Thank you,” you whisper. She pecks you on the lips before pulling back.

“Now about this other part,” she says with faux-sternness, “what do you mean you hate your body?”

“Ugh,” you begin, rolling onto your back to stare at the canopy above you. You know saying this is going to be easier without Cumulus’ soft gaze looking into yours. “You know it’s the usual…internalized fatphobia bullshit. I don’t like what I see in the mirror, never have. Especially when I compare myself to the other sisters…I envy you, you know?”

She cocks her head at you and you face her once more.

“You’re so confident and beautiful and you know you’re beautiful and that makes you even more beautiful,” you gush, making her lips twitch, “I just…augh. Want that for me too, you know?”

Cumulus shakes her head.

“Humans are so weird about their bodies,” she sighs, “as if the vessels that hold all your complexities and your knowledge and your love and the things that make you…you…are anything but incidental. There’s no one right way to be beautiful. Not to be cheesy or anything but beauty can’t be universally gauged by any one person’s opinion. Or society’s opinion for that matter. And like you said - you think I’m beautiful and we have similar shapes, would you ever speak as unkindly to me as you do yourself?”

“No!” you blurt out, hand reaching out to grab hers, “‘Lus I would never.”

“So what makes you any different?” she asks patiently.

“I…well…”

“Exactly,” she nods, triumphant. “You are physically beautiful whether you believe it or not but more importantly your heart is what drew all of us. None of us had ever made friends with siblings before you and you welcomed us into your life with open arms, no judgment. You treated us with kindness and grace from the moment we first spoke. We adore all of you - whether that’s your body, your mind, or your soul. I wouldn’t change a single thing about you and I guarantee if you ask the others they’ll say the same.”

“Thank you.” Your voice is small and you dodge her gaze.

Cumulus makes a thoughtful noise and grabs the edge of the blanket, yanking it off the two of you, causing you to squawk at your nakedness. Cumulus’ gaze is hungry, traveling up your body from feet to face.

“I’m not trying to change the subject or anything,” she purrs, reaching a hand out to knead your hip, “but how about I show you just how beautiful you really are, huh?”

Your throat is dry as you look over her like she did you before nodding.

“I’ll go gentle,” Cumulus murmurs, claws dancing along your skin, “you uh…you got that gift I gave you?”

Oh, do you. Not that you’ve had much use for it with your ghoul harem on call.

“Bedside drawer,” you rasp out as her fingers cheekily pinch at your nipple, “there’s uh…others in there too.”

Cumulus rises from the bed and stands, waggling her eyebrows at you. When she opens the drawer she gasps in delight.

“Who…?”

“Aurora,” you laugh softly, “she told me my stash was ‘severely lacking’ and you know how Papa Copia gave you guys that credit card?”

Cumulus laughs and the sound is so bright and joyous it makes your heart clench.

“Let’s see,” she begins, bending over. “Found the one I got you. And hmm…perhaps this?”

You look to see what she’s put on the bed. The little pocket vibe with devil horns she got you, which you are extremely fond of, and…oh. Interesting. The iridescent glass dildo you hadn’t tried yet with its bulbous head and smooth shaft. Your mouth falls open, considering the implications of the items you see before you and when Cumulus clears her throat, your eyes shoot up to hers.

“Easy, girl,” she breathes, scooching her nightgown up her body and over her head. It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve seen her do it, your mouth still waters. She grabs the toys and crawls over to you, grinning sharply. Once she’s by your side you roll onto your back, tongue darting out to wet your lips. You can already feel the heat and slick accumulating between your thighs. She props her head up and with her free hand, she drags her cool fingertips down your arm, leaving goosebumps in her wake. 

“Love how sensitive you are,” she purrs, her breath stirring your hair. She reaches between you and picks up the little vibe, turning it on. With a grin she drags it across your lips and jaw, along your clavicle, down your sternum, and brushes the underside of your breast. Between her cool touch and your arousal you feel your nipples growing taut and judging from the delighted noise Cumulus just made, she sees it too.

“Pretty,” she breathes, taking the toy and circling the bud, playing connect the dots with the little bumps on your areola. “You like these pretty titties?”

She patiently waits for you to answer, content to just tease you until she hears you say it - and mean it. You look down and behold the swell of your breasts.

“Y-yeah,” you stutter out, “yeah I do.”

She makes a noise of affirmation in her throat before mercifully dragging the vibe over your nipple. The sensation makes your cunt clench and your legs spread wider.

“How about this one, you like this one?” she asks, sliding the vibe over to your other breast.

“Yes,” you breathe, more confident this time. She rewards you by leaning in and slipping your taut nipple into her mouth, sucking insistently. When your hips flex and a moan escapes you, she returns the vibe to your other nipple. The hungry little noises she makes as her tongue slides over you has your hand flying to her curls. When she pulls off, you let out an embarrassing whine.

“‘Lus, please,” you whimper.

“Don’t worry, angel, I’m not done with you yet. Got all night, huh?”

All night. The implication of her having her way with you until the sun rises makes another gush of slick come out of you. You surely must be dripping on the duvet at this point. She tucks her body along yours, her leg hooking around your calf to spread you open and she inhales sharply.

“Mmmm,” she moans, knowing full well she’s caught the scent of you. The notion makes your head fall back against your pillow and your back arch. “Filthy girl,” she pants as she drags the little vibe over your belly, “filthy, beautiful girl. Isn’t that right?”

She stops her hand at your mound, teasing along the curls. You know she won’t descend further until you say what she wants to hear.

“Beautiful girl,” you say, breathing heavily through your nose. She moves the vibe closer to your slit.

“Say it again,” she tells you and you exhale sharply.

“Beautiful girl.”

She drags along the slit.

“Again,” she prompts.

“Beautiful gir–ah!”

When she slips the little devil between your folds and rests it on your clit, you want to cry with relief. Her fingers press down on it as your hips buck upwards and you moan.

“‘Lus, so good. Fuck, yes, right there.”

She smiles and leans in to kiss your throat, her tongue tracing over your carotid. You’re squirming but she holds the little devil steady against you, teeth dragging over your skin as your hips buck up against her. 

“Gonna cum quick for me tonight, huh baby?”

You let out a whine and bite your lip, nodding vigorously.

“Yes, yes, yes, Cumulus, fuck, don’t stop, don’t–ah!”

Now you know you’re dripping on the duvet as your cunt clenches around nothing and Cumulus urges you through your first orgasm of the night. You feel almost dizzy as you fist the covers and look over at her with adoring eyes.

“L-love you.”

She grins, all teeth.

“You’re easy, aren’t you? Besides I know you love me - let’s work on you, hmm?”

Gently she eases the vibe away from you so you can catch your breath. When she picks up the dildo and raises it to rest the head on your lower lip you groan.

“Didn’t forget about this beauty, did you?” she coos and lazily you flick your tongue out to brush against the tip. The action makes her gasp and her gaze darken.

“That’s right,” she breathes, “I remember how much you liked my cock in your mouth. First one you ever had. Can you be a good, pretty little slut and take this one for me too?”

You nod and extend the flat of your tongue for her to put the head on. When she eases it into your mouth you hollow your cheeks and suck hard on the glass, eyes on hers. Cumulus has maintained immaculate control of herself all evening until this point and you feel her sharp exhales on your shoulder as she slowly slides the dildo out of your mouth and pushes it back in. The glass is cool in your mouth as you greedily take more.

“That’s it, sweetheart,” Cumulus murmurs, “Nice and deep. Like to watch you with one of the guys sometime. Maybe Mountain or Aether. Watch that pretty little mouth stretch and stretch while you take their fat cocks. Maybe we’ll make a contest of it. See who you can take the most of. Would you like that?”

She wetly slides the dildo out of your mouth and lets you pant for a moment.

“Y-yeah. I’d like that ‘Lus.”

“Good girl,” she purrs, dragging it down your chest to your hardened nipple. She giggles before sharply slapping it, making you jolt and your hips twitch.

“Cumulus, please,” you breathe as she continues to make a wet path down your body. When she drags the bulbous head through your folds, you whimper. Obligingly she spreads you open and nudges your entrance with the head.

“Only beautiful girls get fucked,” she hums, ever-so-slightly pushing you open, “So if you really want it that would make you…?”

Your head falls backwards against the pillow as a soft laugh comes out of your open mouth.

“A beautiful girl,” you obediently state.

“Do you mean it?”

“Yes I mean I–I can’t see myself so how would I know?”

Cumulus scoffs.

“You wanna know how you look, baby? The way you flush so prettily from your cheeks all the way down? The way those sweet little nipples look all hard and begging to be sucked? The way your hair falls on the pillow? The wet curls in between your legs and this dripping cunt all ready for me? Darling, what would you call that if not beautiful?”

Your chest heaves and you look her in the eyes.

“I’m a beautiful girl.”

The conviction in your voice makes her cheeks crinkle in a grin and gently she pushes the head of the toy inside you. Your jaw falls open as she continues to ease it inside.

“That’s it, honey,” she murmurs, scooting her body down for greater access and to nuzzle at your breast. “Take it all. Doing so well.”

Your breathing is coming out in short pants, a moan hanging on your lips. When the toy bottoms out she leans down and presses a kiss to your chest. The curved shaft and the fat head of the toy is pressing against a spot inside you that makes white stars bloom behind your closed eyelids.

“Cumulus, please.”

That’s all she needs before she eases the dildo out and pushes it back in. Her pace starts off slow but before long her wrist snaps in controlled thrusts. You can’t speak, can barely keep up with breathing as she fucks you at a steady pace.

“So good for me,” she pants, eyes cast down at the iridescent glass and how it disappears inside you, “so fucking good, baby. Always so sweet. So giving. ‘S what we love about you. How eager you are.”

The slick noises coming out of your body are lewd as your hips buck up to meet each thrust. Your moans are loud and finally you seem to have regained the ability to speak.

“Fuck, ‘Lus,” you whine, “L-love you. Love you so–ah–m-much. Don’t stop. P-please don’t–”

“Oh angel, I wouldn’t dream of it,” she coos, changing the angle of her wrist and making you choke out a gasp, “Watching you come apart is better than anything.”

The pleasure is so intense - feels so good - tears begin to leak out of the corners of your eyes and you know you’re close. You’re babbling nonsense as you sob and she increases her pace, eyes on your cunt.

“Gonna cum for me, honey?” she pants, her own hips flexing against you unconsciously. You try to answer but all that comes out of you is a long, low moan. “Come on my beautiful girl, give it to me.”

Your hips jerk upwards as your back bows off the bed and you cum with a scream. Cumulus is speaking to you but all you can hear is static as she continues to fuck you through your orgasm. You struggle to catch your breath as the corners of your vision go dark and you grab at her.

“C-can’t Cumulus, I can’t.”

Gently she slows her pace and you finally manage to inhale deep when she comes to a stop. She’s panting almost as much as you are, her eyes dancing over your face. You’re overwhelmed - the whole night just too fucking much - and you let out a pathetic little sob. She eases the toy out of you and sets it aside, immediately scooting up to see you.

“Hey, hey, hey,” she breathes, leaning in to press her lips against your forehead. “You did so well, my love. So well. I’m so proud. Beautiful, wonderful girl.”

You expect tears to accompany your sobbing but it would seem you’ve already cried yourself dry tonight. You concentrate on Cumulus’ breath to even out your own as she strokes your sweat-damp hair away from your face.

“That was a lot,” your voice is hoarse and she nods.

“Yeah, it was. And you were perfect. I love you. So, so much, baby.”

You nod and the two of you pull apart, content to calm yourselves in each other’s presence. Cumulus rolls onto her back and stares at the canopy.

“You know…” she begins thoughtfully after a few minutes, raising a hand to point, “we could definitely put a mirror up there.”

The giggle that comes out of you quickly escalates to a guffaw and shaking, you press a kiss to Cumulus’ shoulder.

“Like some kind of depraved sex den?” you ask with a grin.

“Uh-huh,” she confirms, smiling equally wide. You roll your eyes and yawn so wide you hear your jaw pop.

“Bed?” she asks, sitting up.

“Mmm mmhmm,” you say, sitting up, swinging your legs over and standing up. You’re going to be deliciously sore in the morning. 

“Hey,” Cumulus says behind you and you turn around as she peels the covers back, “Proud of you.”

You nod and uncover your side before climbing back in. She does the same.

“Thank you for taking care of me,” you murmur, eyelids heavy. Cumulus leans in to kiss you once on the forehead, once on the cheek, and once on the lips.

“It’s my honor. Sleep well, angel.”

You’re not sure if you respond, already drifting off. The rumble of purrs fills your head and sets you at ease. You’re warm. You’re safe. And you are loved.

#ghoul bicycle series #cumulus ghoulette #cumulus x reader #cumulus x female reader #the band ghost #the band ghost fic #rachel writes

[upat4amwiththemoon]

can I request a Daisy Johnson x reader fanfic where reader works at shield and is the (secret) daughter of Coulson and May and only a small circle, not including Daisy knows who readers parents are. Reader and Daisy met at shield hq and Daisy ends up ranting to Coulson about the girl she met and after a while Coulson realises Daisy is talking about his daughter?

Accidental oversharing

Summary: The secret daughter of Phil Coulson and Melinda May.

Pairing: Daisy Johnson x female!reader, Philinda x daughter!reader

Warnings: none

Word count: 772

a/n: day 1000 of wishing Marvel gave us more Daisy Johnson content

Tags: @thought-of-you-and-me @rafecameronswhore

masterlists | guidelines

“Oh shit!” A stack of papers falls to the ground as Daisy’s body bumps right into someone in the middle of the SHIELD headquarters’ hallway.

“I’m so sorry.” The other woman mumbles as she kneels down, starting to gather all the papers from the ground. “I wasn’t looking where I was going.”

“No, it’s my fault,” Daisy picks up the few papers that flew further away.

The woman gives Daisy a small smile as she stands up, now holding all of her papers. She takes a double take, her brows scrunching together. “Aren’t you the Quake?”

“Oh god,” she cringes at the mention of her superhero name, “please call me Daisy. I hate that name.”

“Okay, Daisy. I’m Y/N.” Freeing one of her hands, Y/N reaches it out to shake Daisy’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”

It’s not that Daisy doesn’t pay attention to the people working at SHIELD, because she does, she makes sure to be at least polite to everyone (who deserves it), but right now she can’t help but stare at the woman in front of her, taking her in fully. “Uhuh.” She nods, shaking Y/N’s hand softly.

“Okay.” She lets out a small laugh before pulling her hand away from Daisy’s weak grip. “I really have to get going, but I’ll see you around, maybe.” Y/N waits for a couple of seconds before walking away.

“Yeah…” Daisy whispers, her eyes following her until she finally registers reality. “Wait what?” Her eyes widen as a visceral need to get the woman’s number comes over her. She desperately looks around to find the woman, but the sea of people has already hidden her from sight. “Shit.”

Daisy has no choice but to continue her way to Coulson, who called for her at least 30 minutes ago.

“Hey, Daisy?” Coulson’s hand waves in front of her face. “Are you listening to me?”

Daisy sighs, coming out of her dreamland as she focused her gaze on Coulson. “No, sorry AC.”

“What’s going on?”

Leaning her head over the back of the couch, Daisy smiles softly as she reminisces what happened not too long ago. “I bumped into someone, a woman, today. I don’t think I’ve seen her around before, because I’d definitely remember her if I had.”

“Someone finally caught your eye?” Coulson has a small grin on his face as he listens to her talk.

“What do you mean finally?” She scoffs, rolling her eyes before going to explaining. “She was so beautiful and nice, so cute, and I was acting so weird around her.” Daisy lays her hand over her face, a small grimace on it. “But I couldn’t help it! I got completely mesmerized by her.”

Though Coulson wanted to tease her at first, his grin turns into a genuine smile. Daisy hasn’t really paid attention to people after everything that happened with Ward and then Lincoln, so he is truly happy for her.

“I didn’t get her number though.” She mumbles. “But her name is Y/N, do you know her?”

At the mention of her name, Coulson’s brows raise. “Y/N? About yay tall, great hair, smiling all the time?” He gestures with his hands, wanting to make sure they’re thinking about the same person.

“Yeah! So you do know her?”

“Ask her number from May. I’m banner from that duty since I apparently don’t know how to judge a person’s vibes well enough.” He says it as if it’s the moat ridiculous thing he has ever heard, but there’s fondness in his tone.

Daisy furrows her brows, now lifting her head up properly to watch Coulson. “You know her well? May too?”

“Mhm.” He smiles, his arms crossed over his chest. “She is our daughter.”

There is a prolonged silence as Daisy tries to wrap her head around the sentence. “Daughter? You-“ she opens and closes her mouth, her wide eyes stuck on Coulson’s grinning face. “I know you two are together, but long enough to have a whole adult daughter?”

“Very few people know.”

“Why wasn’t I one of those people?”

“Security reasons. Don’t worry, none of the people on the team know.” Coulson takes out his phone, informing May that Daisy is now aware of their daughter.

“But-“ Daisy huffs before shaking her head. “Philinda daughter…” she mumbles.

“Please don’t call her that. May might hurt you.” Coulson pats Daisy’s shoulder. “Do you want her number?”

“Yes! Yes, I want her number.”

“Go get it from May-“ Daisy is already on her feet, “she is getting the bus ready.” And Daisy is gone, leaving Coulson to chuckle by himself.

#marvel #mcu #mcu imagine #marvel imagine #mcu fanfiction #fluff #daisy johnson x y/n #daisy johnson x fem!reader #daisy johnson x female reader #daisy johnson x you #daisy johnson fanfiction #daisy johnson imagine #daisy johnson x reader #daisy johnson #agents of shield imagine #agents of shield fanfic #agents of shield fanfiction #agents of shield #quake x reader #quake #quake imagine #quake fanfiction #philinda #phil coulson x melinda may #philinda x daughter!reader #phil coulson #melinda may #daisy johnson x philinda daughter!reader

[damn-stark]

Chapter 42 IFHY

Chapter 42 of Sugar

A/N- This mc is one of the most human mcs I’ve written in my opinion and I will miss writing her and her technique so much when this series comes to an end!

Warning- Swearing, ANGST!!!, talks of death, VIOLENCE, SPOILERS!!!!

Pairing- Choso x Gojo!fem-reader, Suguru Geto x Gojo!fem-reader

Episode and or chapters- Chapter 260-261

(Let me know if you want to be tagged)

————

There he is, in all his glory. Standing right across from you. The brother you thought you lost…your hope revived, your joy, and your cure to your solace.

How is it possible that he’s alive after being sliced in half?

Then again, he is Satoru Gojo and Shoko probably had something to do with it too.

Not that it matters now, he’s alive just as you thought you lost everything.

“Satoru,” you whisper breathlessly and step forward with a wobbly growing smile.

Said man draws out a deep breath and stays quiet. He stays where he is and doesn’t greet you with something smug. Which is odd, but considering he was dead his lack of witty comments is not concerning.

However, as you get closer to him he shuffles back and finally begins to lift his head. You watch his face the entire time and notice a rather unusual displeased frown. You want to comment on it and assure him that it’s all fine, but you then notice something trailing on his forehead, something particular that you’ve only seen on one other person.

But it can’t be…

Yet it’s believable. He survived so long for a reason—But it can’t be Kenjaku can it? It can’t be him taking over your brother's body, you killed him with your own hands. It can’t…

But it is.

“No,” you mumble in horror and come to an immediate halt. “No,” you repeat with a flicker of change in your tone.

The man pretending to be your brother doesn’t show smugness, not like when he pretended to be Suguru, he seems rather uncomfortable and still displeased.

“No,” you cry out and step back, making the pretender step forward with his arms out.

“It’s not Kenjaku,” he says in his voice, in that soft yet deep and stupid smug voice Satoru had.

“It’s,” he pauses and glances over at Shoko, but you don’t follow his line of gaze, your eyes stay glued on him as you prepare an attack.

“It’s Yuta…Okkotsu…” he trails off, and you only become more horrified. Perhaps even more so than when you thought it was Kenjaku in that split second because it can’t be the same boy that killed Suguru, it can’t be him who took your brother too, who is using him the same way Kenjaku used Suguru.

It can’t be the boy who Satoru saved from a death sentence. It can't be the boy Miguel vouched for or the boy you forgave. It can’t be him…

“I wish I could explain,” he keeps talking in a stolen voice he somehow manipulated to sound like his own awkward one. “I wish you didn’t have to find out this way. I’m sorry.”

He’s sorry? Sorry?

And that’s all he has to say to explain this madness, this…robbery. A crime, a betrayal of the highest offense before he just waltzs off without even meeting your eye?

Why? Why? Why? Why?

You keep asking yourself why him once again. You look to Shoko for the answer, but her attention is on Choso’s body getting picked up by the people helping her, so she misses your cry for help, therefore missing the window she had to talk you down and try and comfort you.

Choso wouldn’t have missed that window, he would’ve clocked your growing anger, and your soul shattering even more at the knowledge that Okkotsu is using your brother's body as if he were some weapon to be picked up and used at his convenience.

Choso would’ve been surprised too at the sight of those stitches but when everything was explained he would’ve heard your silent cry for help, he would’ve stopped your grief from twisting to rage. But he’s not here, and Shoko didn’t catch that window, Kirara was beside you, but they couldn’t read you so deeply, so that grief so obviously painted on every perimeter of your face and body, and every inch of your soul gets tainted by this display of monstrosity and betrayal that only you saw because he had already taken the man you loved last year.

Yuta Okkotsu is the reason Suguru Geto is dead. And now he’s taken your beloved brother only a year later, and all he has to say is sorry…but he didn’t even meet your eyes either, he stood stiffly in that same spot before walking away as if nothing was wrong.

Why is no one reacting? Why is no one as livid as you?

Why? Why? Why?!

You…should've killed him a long time ago. Why did you ever forgive Okkotsu? Why is he using your brother's body the same way Kenjaku used Suguru? Why is this happening again?

Why?!

Why is he getting away? You can’t let him get away, you can’t let him take someone else you love. Satoru was your brother and if no one else will do anything about it, you will.

You will!

So with nothing else in your mind but livid anger, you slowly turn with your hand curling into a fist. You summon fire to start this attack, but as you try to bask your fist with your reliable flames all you get is a spark which has never happened before—well not since you first started training…

Yet, you don’t think too deeply about your complications, instead, you act quickly and dig in your pocket. Your Worm cursed spirit balled up inside doesn’t fail to hand you the blade you wanted, a blade that Shoko doesn’t see since she's lost in her own thoughts, and Kirara doesn’t get to notice because your back is turned, leaving you an opening, letting you dig your heels on the ground before you charge at Okkotsu from behind.

The pretender doesn’t expect you to charge at him so he doesn’t watch his back. He doesn’t even hear you coming right away. Everything is happening fast to everyone else, but for you time moves slowly.

You have time to clench your jaw and twist your face into a wicked sneer. You have time to get near him before you blurt out a broken cry from so deep inside your chest that it hurts your lungs and brings streams of tears to your eyes.

And in your unexpected fit of rage, you actually manage to swing your blade and slash the pretenders back before he spins around and jumps back to dodge your next swing.

“I’m gonna kill you,” you snap at Okkotsu and this time you pretend to swing your blade. Okkotsu swings to the other side to miss being cut, but he steps right into your line of fire so you manage to swing your fist and land a hard jab across his face.

Shoko shouts your name and tells you to stop, but you kick your leg and hurl the pretender back.

“I won’t,” Okkotsu mutters with new blood trickling down his nose and his busted lip. “I won't fight you out of respect for him. He loved you.”

He…loved…you, but now he’s gone too…

And Okkotsu has the audacity to say that so casually while being in his body.

“I hate you,” you snarl and lunge at him again, this time you manage to throw your arms around his waist and tackle him to the ground.

Kirara tries to stop you, but you grab onto the pretender's shoulders and roll your bodies out of reach, and quickly try to make quick work of him before you’re eventually stopped. Even if he doesn’t try to stop you, you slam your fists across his face again and again until he’s bleeding from one eye, and his nose is crooked.

You pull your arm back to swing again, but as Okkotsu watches you with your brother's bright blue eyes that had been so unique, you suddenly halt in your attack and meet his gaze with a sense of guilt.

You see your brother, the only brother you had. The brother who would let you sneak into his bed when you were little kids because you were terrified. You see Satoru Gojo, your daughter's Uncle, your best friend, and the brother who loved you regardless of all you did. You see him and you have the sudden need to stop this foolishness.

But…that ever so heavy grief stabs you in the heart as a flash of him smiling at you like everything was great in the world passes through your mind, and you can’t help but grow rabid almost as if it had been a switch.

“You motherfucker!” You bellow at him as you pick up your blade from the ground and swing up. “You’re going to fucking die!” You cry out of agony and rage and don’t hesitate a moment longer before swinging down.

Satoru once hesitated last year when you fought. He had you pinned and he was going to make a finishing move, but he hesitated. You don’t. You bring the blade down.

Albeit just as the tip nears the pretender’s forehead, a force manages to grab your wrists, stopping you just in time.

“Stop,” you recognize that deep voice.

“Yuta!” You hear a young woman yell.

“Stop it,” the voice beside you whispers sharply.

Choso?

You look over and expect your husband, but you actually see Miguel.

“He has a job to do,” he tries to get it through your head so you’d cooperate, but betrayal blares throughout your head.

“You knew?” You ask, almost frightened.

Miguel scoffs. “No, of course not. I pieced it together just now and even I know you can’t kill him.”

You look back down at Okkotsu in your brother's body and shake your head. “But he’s my brother.” You whisper heartbrokenly.

“And what Okkotsu has to do is much more important than that, don’t you see it? This is not like Kenjaku and Suguru. Focus.”

Strong heart Choso would say.

But you can’t. Not when he’s gone too.

However, Maki walks over and pulls the pretender out from under you so you won't snap again and actually finish the job this time.

“Go,” you hear her tell him. “Who knows how much time you have left now.”

“But…” your whisper quivers, “he’s my brother.”

“Yes, he was,” Miguel corrects you between trying to sound comforting yet affirmative.

Not like it actually eases anything. You don’t continue on your rampage, you just sit there brokenheartedly and watch Okkotsu take away your brother's body with him into the disaster Sukuna made with nothing but his raw power.

It almost feels like your brother is leaving you behind all over again. You’re watching him walk away and it feels like that day 11 years ago when he left you behind. You feel that same ache. You know it’s not the same, not at all, but in the back of your mind it feels like the same thing.

“Get up,” Miguel says a lot kinder than before as he takes the blade away and pulls you to your feet, which would make this the second time someone has helped you up as if you were some wounded animal. You really hate it, it makes you feel so weak, but you also can’t help it, you can’t muster that much strength, not anymore.

“We could both use some rest now,” you hear someone else interject, and when you look over you notice Larue. He’s wounded but alive.

“You’re okay,” you point out with a sense of relief.

Larue narrows his eyes and his eyebrows slowly knit together before he releases a disbelieved gasp.

“Bring her with me,” Shoko interrupts before you can press Larue for an answer about his sudden confusion and then ask if what you asked for worked.

When you look over at Shoko, however, that anger returns. It’s not violent like the anger you had for Okkotsu. it’s livid yes, and blinding too, but filled with nothing else but betrayal.

She doesn’t see it though, she doesn’t hear it in your voice or in the way your body stiffens and stays in place rather than trailing after her.

“Get Choso’s body,” you tell Miguel, who doesn’t fret to follow after the man carrying your husband's body, causing Shoko to stop in her tracks and turn around to face you. However, the moment she does turn you avert her gaze and watch Miguel gently take Choso from the hand of strangers.

“Will we finally leave, I admit perhaps I made a grave mistake by coming,” Larue interjects with exhaustion weighing his voice down.

“Almost,” you assure him, making Shoko probe.

“What do you mean?”

You ignore her and begin to turn, but she strides over in a hurry and grabs your arm to stop you and turn you around to grab your chin and pick your head up, and look into your eyes.

You don’t understand what she’s doing nor do you care to, so you quickly pull yourself away and step back with your face twisting in anger. Shoko doesn’t understand your sudden precaution, she actually finds it hurtful as well as worrying that you were so quick to pull away though.

“Are you okay?” She checks on you, but you let her words be carried away. You have things to say, but you can’t or want to entertain her any longer. It’s petty, you know, you tend to just give people the cold shoulder when they’ve deeply wounded you, but you just can’t help it, or be the better person, your words just get stuck in your heart. And since you no longer feel like you have such a thing, the words fall into the abyss, leaving you silent and angry.

Shoko is quick to grasp what’s happening, she doesn’t know why, but she’s starting to pick up on your silent treatment and that anger embedded in your deep and long frown, as well as your fisted hands. Thus she calls out for you loudly and demandingly.

And this time you react by slowly lifting your head and meeting her worried and puzzled gaze, letting her see once and for all what she suspected in full glory, the eyes of the woman you used to be, the eyes that Satoru claimed were where he found his home. They aren’t infused with flames, not anymore, they’re the eyes you were born with, the eyes Shoko met for the first time when you started school. Only now your eyes are a strangers for a third time.

Albeit this time she won’t let you be estranged.

“I’m sorry,” Shoko finally says out loud as she starts to grasp what’s going on with you. “It hurts, I know, but you can’t walk away. I won’t let you walk away, not again.”

Her words sting. They feel like getting stabbed and or being robbed of breath. But it doesn't stop those words that you had lost find their way back.

“What do you know about my hurt?” You snap back with your eyes narrowing and your brows pinching together. “What do you know about anything I feel? Did you even try to stop them? He was your best friend.”

Shoko’s breath catches but she doesn’t falter, even if her watery eyes say otherwise. “Humanity relies on certain sacrifices. He knew that…Satoru knew that…”

You gasp as if his name coming out of her mouth physically hurt you.

“…that’s why he let it happen.”

You swallow thickly and understand what she says, it sounds like something he would do, but you can’t accept it. Not because you don’t want to believe it, but because you’re angry she didn’t stop him.

“He would do something stupid like that,” you feign a laugh and sniffle. “But that’s when you stop him. That’s when you fight him. Did you even try? Why didn’t you tell me?” You ask with a quivering voice.

Shoko steps forward and doesn’t hide to spare you. “Because he knew how you would react.”

You process her words and think about how considerate your brother was. He never failed to think about you.

Why did you realize that so late into your life?

“Because he knew I would stop him from doing something stupid,” you argue. “This was stupid. He never lived his life, he never actually thought about what he wanted, he always thought about everyone else. It’s why I would’ve stopped him because it’s stupid!”

“And what you’re doing now isn’t stupid?” Shoko quickly counters, making you clench your jaw and exhale deeply with frustration. “People still need you.”

“It’s not the same,” you defend your actions. “You know that, so don’t throw it at my face like it is.”

Shoko sighs deeply and takes another step closer to you, which doesn’t make you move back. You stay put and hold her tear-filled gaze.

“You should’ve stopped him,” you leave no room for her to interject. “You should’ve stopped them from using his body like some kind of tool the same way Suguru’s was. And you shouldn’t have lied to me about why you needed Kenjaku’s brain.”

“You would have understood?” She quickly spats.

You stay calm and shrug. “Kenjaku was Choso’s father, it was for him to decide, not me. And I’m sure he would’ve given it up if you asked. Instead, you lied about it and about Satoru.”

Shoko parts her lips to argue back, but she instead drops her gaze and swallows back nervously. “Okkotsu needed Suguru’s body too,” she throws out rapidly and shakily.

And now for you, it gets hard to breathe. You can’t breathe. Your chest is too heavy.

Suguru was yours. Yours and Satori’s. You just got him back from the clutches of some insane sorcerer. He could finally rest and she…they…

Breathe…

Breathe.

Breathe.

“I’m sorry,” is all Shoko says.

You still can’t breathe. It hurts too much.

Shoko sees that and grabs your shoulder to try and soothe your growing panic.

“Just—”

You cut her off by slapping her hand away and taking a big step back while you look at her as if she had just literally stabbed you in the back. You then point an accusing finger at her, but nothing comes out, you’re crippled with betrayal.

After a second of you and her just growing tension, a shaky breath finally makes it past your lips but words don’t follow. They’re lost for good this time. Shoko calls out to you in an attempt to hear from you, to continue this argument so she could try and mend what she could so you wouldn’t leave, but it’s too late and the wrong choices were made. Choices for the good of humanity perhaps, but you don’t see it that way in your agonizing grief.

You see blaring betrayal and your silence loudly displays it as well as the tears that crawl down your cheeks.

“Kirara,” you direct at the only person you can speak to, someone you don’t blame because they’re young, and they don’t carry that same history with Satoru or Suguru. Perhaps they accepted snatching Satoru’s body, but it’s not the same as Shoko accepting it. Not in your eyes.

“If you need help, call me, I won’t be far. I’ll be watching over Kinji from the broadcast,” you let them know as you step back.

“Where are you going?” They quickly blurt in confusion. “You can't go.”

You sigh and just hold their gaze. “I’ll be close to Yuji. Or as close as I can be.” You assure them and then spare one last glance at Shoko, catching tears rolling down her cheeks and a deep grief that mirrors yours. But you can’t look past your own pain to care. You just let your gaze linger as you ache for things to be different for the sake of your friendship and the love you bear for her, but you can’t…no matter how hard you try, you can’t look past her letting them use Satoru, and taking Suguru’s body from you.

Even if it isn’t her fault, or if it is, you don’t care. You just turn away and leave her behind the same way Suguru did, and the same way Satoru did.

You almost find yourself leaving it all behind and just giving up on everything, it’s what they deserve after dehumanizing Satoru the way they did. And you don’t care if it’s for the greater good, who cares if somehow you would have understood in a different life, you don’t care. Just like you don’t care about trying to understand Shoko. They took something from you, they hurt you, and you can’t look past it, you aren’t that big of a person because he was your brother, and no matter what happened he was always there. Now he won’t, now they’ve taken him, just like they took Suguru.

However, as much as you want to leave, as much as you hate humanity as a whole now, people you still care about are out fighting with their lives. They’re the only reason why you stay behind.

You won’t fight anymore, you’ll just look out for them away from Shoko, and from the depths of your solitude that drowns out the concept of time, the conversation Larue and Miguel hold, and the calamity of battle in the far distance.

Even surrounded by people that loneliness that you so feared still plagues you, how funny is that?

Nevertheless, you don’t break from your trance until Miguel taps your leg. He notices your lack of know-how and sighs before probing, “what did you do?”

There’s no need to ask what he's referring to because you know from the silence of the wind, the coldness that outran the heat that once ran through your veins as if it was blood, the unwelcoming earth that doesn’t eagerly speak to you, and the ignoring water that up and left you from ever feeling its delicate touch, that he’s referring to the binding vow that has yet to prove it worked.

Binding vows aren’t known to fail, but this binding vow is different, you’re exchanging powers for life. It’s different therefore there’s a high chance all you get is played.

“I can still see curses,” you don’t give Miguel the answers he seeks. “I’m not a non-sorcerer.”

“No, but you’re basically nothing now,” he hits you with the truth, something that Larue quickly rebuttals in your defense.

“She’s not nothing, you’re just being cruel—”

“I’m being honest,” Miguel cuts Larue off. “She’s useless in this fight now. What you did was stupid.”

You blink and try to look over at Choso, but you can’t bring yourself to look at him. You haven’t been able to look at him because if it doesn’t work all you gave up will be for nothing and you’ll end up just repaying for all the evil you’ve done.

“You don’t know what I did,” you retort and slide your eyes up to pierce your annoyed glare at him.

Miguel sighs and glances at the man you left behind you before looking back at you. “I have an idea,” he assumes right. “Giving everything you are for something that has never been done before is stupid. What will you do now?”

You drift your gaze to your hands and mutter. “Nothing. I won’t do anything. Even if I had my technique I wouldn't do anything because I don't care about them anymore. Humanity can die for all I care.”

Larue watches you with pity after knowing how much you deeply cared about the sorcerer side of humanity. He almost doesn’t recognize who you are, but just like Shoko, he knows this is you grieving. You’re at your worst and all the people who could’ve pulled you out of it are gone. You’re alone and he knows it’s drowning you.

Larue almost wants to try and comfort you even if he knows it’d be a useless endeavor, but Miguel pushes off his attempts.

“Why didn’t you ever do it for Suguru then, what you did now for this man?” Miguel asks.

You’ve thought about that too during your time on this roof, and the answer is simple, you had your brother so you weren’t writhing in your loneliness like you are now. You love them both the same way, you just…had…Satoru. Now you don’t.

“Satoru was here. The twins. Nanami. Now I don’t have anyone…” you trail off and fist your hands so hard your nails pierce a layer of skin. Yet it doesn’t hurt like you thought it would, no matter how hard you keep pressing, or if blood spills.

“You have us,” Larue breaks the silence and pulls your eyes away from the blood you spill. You offer him a smile but it’s far too short-lived.

“I’m going to kill Okkotsu,” you blurt with more emotion than you’ve shown over the past several minutes. “And neither of you are going to stop me.”

Both Miguel and Larue look at you with surprise, even if what you want is like you, the way you say it so bluntly and carrying so much pain catches them off guard for a moment until Miguel steps towards your sitting figure and argues back with frustration.

“You’ll doom humanity if you do…” he trails off and you don't care to follow up with what catches his breath, you don’t look at him right away either, but when you do you snap your eyes up and glare at him with a fuming anger that blinds you.

“I told you I don’t care about humanity,” you spat back and don’t get curious about what he and Larue are suddenly lost on. It isn’t until you hear your name being uttered by a familiar voice that your attention is fully captivated, and there in the barren cold relives a warmth you thought was forever lost.

However, you don’t look back right away, you’re too scared it’s your mind tricking you. After all, you've seen an illusion of Suguru before, and as beautiful as it was, it was only an illusion. You don’t want to be let down again. Thus you let him call out to you again to assure yourself that you heard that deep but gentle melody of his voice before you slowly turn with your eyes downcasted but widened and filled with tears.

A part of the spot you left him on was now empty and lacked a part of his body, and there’s no way a dead man could move by himself. But you still don’t face him because now you’re plagued with the thought of what if he’s somehow still dead and your vow was somehow twisted.

You can feel the shocked stares from Larue and Miguel, they fill the silence with disbelief and impatience for you to react, while…Choso…waits, but also finds himself trying to grasp how he’s back and how his heart is beating once again.

“Is it really you?” You have to ask for your own sake.

You hear shuffling before your breath catches at the sound of his voice. “I think. I’m not sure…one thing I do know is that I’m naked under this sheet.”

You muster a breathless laugh while fat tears run down your cheeks and the shattered heart inside you mends together.

“You…” you trail off and he fills your silence.

“Burnt….I remember. I remember it all. I remember you,” he pauses and sighs. You’re tempted to look but you still can’t.

“I’m sorry,” he brings up softly and filled with sorrow that makes your chest tighten. “I’m sorry. I did the one thing I said I wasn’t going to do. I’m sorry.”

You swallow back thickly and sigh deeply. “Then you understand why I can’t bring myself to go over to you, why I can’t look at you? I don’t want this to be a dream and be hurt all over again.”

“I understand,” he assures you right away before you hear him shifting against the roof in the distance.

“We’ll…be back,” Larue excuses himself and Miguel before they climb down, leaving you and Choso alone under the white sky, and occupying the silence with the sound of his unique footsteps approaching you.

“I would understand if you’re mad at me too,” he says and makes your heart ache in a good way because, of course, he would say something so sweet.

“…I really hurt you. And even if I was dying I hated myself for it because as good of a goodbye I had with Yuji, yours was agonizing,” he continues softly as he stops before you and gets on his knees that are covered by the sheet Larue had put over his body. “I’m sorry, my love. I didn’t want to leave you, I really didn’t. I meant what I told you, I just had no other choice and it proved to be worthwhile, you’re here!” He exclaims proudly as you see his large and pale hand reach over for yours clawing the ground.

“You’re alive, and…” he trails off for a long while. He even stops in his attempts to grab your hand, and honestly, his stillness tempts you to finally lay your eyes on his body, but you keep your eyes glued on the ground since your mind is still protecting you from potentially being disappointed.

“…you’re not hurt,” he mutters with a sense of disbelief that he doesn’t actually show because he focuses on comforting you. “My sacrifice worked. That’s all I wanted. I’m sorry it hurt you, I’m sorry I made you feel so distressed, but my love,” he coos and finally places his hand on yours, making you gasp at the shot of electricity that his fingers pass to yours.

It’s all so reallike, his hand feels so soft, and warm. It’s not an empty touch conjured by your heart's deepest desires, it’s heavy but gentle. Real.

“…I’m here,” he proclaims with a honey-dipped voice he’s using to comfort you. “I’m here because of you…I think.”

You scoff in amusement and then blink when he lifts your hand and presses it against his chest, over where you feel the rhythm of his heartbeat racing when your fingertips first make contact with his chest, but then when he presses your palm harder against his chest his heartbeat eases.

This time you can’t deny the instant connection you feel when your palm feels his heart and makes yours run at the calm pace his heart runs, almost as if connecting them once again was the comfort they needed.

“Choso,” you cry happily and focus just for a single second longer on his heart beating under his chest before you slowly trail your eyes up his body, finding it unchanged and still as toned and perfectly sculpted as it was before. However, when you reach his neck you notice a burn scar that wasn’t there before. And you would know, you traced his whole body multiple times in your short time intimately together.

The scar isn’t big from the front, it’s sprawled over as if the tips of the flames had been wrapped around his neck, but it’s because it’s only peeking forward that you know it’s hiding its true result on Choso’s back where the fire hurt him the most. And when you start seeing his face the mark of what happened continues to spread, but now that doesn’t catch your eye the same way his inviting pink lips do.

The mark that came with his technique isn’t there anymore, it’s completely gone from his nose, meaning that he is probably just like you now, but you don’t focus on that matter now, or the fact that a thin line of fire now replaced the blood mark on his nose. You instead put all your attention on those beautiful eyes that were unchanged.

His eyes are still so sweet and the same rich brown that you loved, and that were uncoincidentally the same shade of brown as your favorite color.

You notice the guilt he carries, the disbelief that runs behind them, as well as the softness painted by his love for you, but what you fixate on the most is that lively gleam in his eyes that had left his eyes when he died. That gleam is back and brighter than before.

“Choso,” you muse and slide your hand over to grab his hand whilst you reach your other hand over to feel his face and set it in your mind that the flesh you feel is real, it’s not a trick, he’s real, he’s back, and the binding vow you made worked!

He’s back!

“Choso,” you laugh and cry at the same time but don’t throw yourself on him. You continue to move your hand up until you reach his head that’s missing his hair but doesn’t take away from how handsome he still is. Some men can’t pull off a bald head but he makes it look hot.

“I’m sorry,” he means his apology as he watches your eyes study his head.

“Don’t worry,” you assure him. “It’ll grow back. It’s just hair, all I care about is you. You’re back.”

Choso nods his head as a smile spreads on his lips. “I am,” he reassures your worry before he brings his hand up to cup your jaw and look into your eyes, trapping the next words you were about to utter in your throat as you remember the change you went through too.

“The eyes you met in the darkness last year won’t ever return, I’m sorry,” you tell him the truth right away just in case that somehow kills the love he has for you. “I…gave up my technique and yours in order to have you back...I’m sorry Choso. I’m sorry.”

Said man sighs deeply and drops his gaze to ponder and nod softly.

“You are a non-sorcerer, I’m sorry,” you break it to him pitifully only because now he can’t use his technique to protect his brother, or feel the twins.

“Choso?” You press impatiently. “I understand why you’d be mad, and why you wouldn’t love me.”

At the sound of those words his eyes fly up to meet your perplexed gaze and he shakes his head before he leans in. “No,” he whispers and cups your face with both hands to gently caress your cheeks as he looks deep into your eyes.

“The day I saw you and your fire-kissed eyes for the first time is something I won’t ever forget, and it’s a change that I will have to get used to, but sweetheart, just know that as I look at you all I see is my sun, my moon, my stars, and my beloved. You.”

You beam at him and can’t hold back anymore, you throw your arms around him and pull him for a tight embrace to make sure you can feel his heart beating against your chest as you hold him.

“I love you too,” you finally tell him what you didn’t have the chance to say when he was sacrificing himself in that fire. Words that don’t actually hold the true meaning of how deeply and passionately you love him.

“I love you,” you whisper again and sob into the crook of his neck. All while Choso holds onto you as if breathing and his life depended on it, as if he would somehow lose you if he let you go.

“I love you too,” he redirects sweetly before he finally assures you about your previous worry. “And…I’m not angry, I'm nothing more than ordinary now. I’m human now. Truly human because of you, and I will miss my technique because it made me strong, but…I can be human with you, my children, and my brother. So thank you.”

You pull back and look at him with a bright and awestruck smile. “You were human to me before, now you’re just a little bit more fragile.”

Choso chuckles softly and nods before his face falls. “Do you still love me as I am now? I know your feelings towards non-sorcerers.”

“Don’t worry,” you assure him as you caress his cheek. “I love you as you are. I don’t care if you're a non-sorcerer and not holding as much power. All that matters is that you’re alive again. That’s the deal I made and my feelings won’t change. Not negatively anyway.” You smile at him.

Choso sighs with relief and just as he’s going to share something you interject coldly. “Besides, I don't care about the sorcerers or non-sources. Not anymore.”

Choso blinks repeatedly in disbelief, and you clench your jaw out of anger while your eyes scream your grief.

“Why?” He asks as he feels thrown off by this sudden change. “You don’t really feel like that do you?”

You clench your fists and scowl as the memory of Okkotsu announcing his identity inside your brother's body plays in your mind and reminds you why your ideals changed so drastically.

“They took the reason why I gave up. They’re using my brother's body like they used Suguru’s. They’re using him and now…” you swallow thickly and huff. “I see Okkotsu in his body and all I hear is the clapping I heard when Riko died. All those people clapped their hands over the death of a little girl…and now that’s all I hear and I can’t care anymore.”

Choso feels a weight over his chest as he hears the cold way you speak. He partially blames himself for the way you think now, even if you just explained the reason why you hate the world, he still finds it in himself to put on some blame because you watched him give up his life to save yours. So even if he was going to help you already, he does it now with more passion.

“No, no, I know that’s not really true. You’re just grieving,” he tries to calm down your anger. “It’s happening again and you’re just using anger to express your grief.”

The creases between your eyebrows crease deeper as your eyebrows pinch further with your heightening anger.

“But whatever they’re doing, they’re doing for the greater good, he would understand that. He would want that.”

“He would want to live and do it himself,” you argue back sharply. “He wouldn't want to get used. He fought the higher-ups for that reason. He wanted to change sorcerer society for that reason!” You exclaim your frustration as you get up and turn to try and breathe as it gets hard to do.

Choso follows you up but doesn't grab you yet, he lets you catch your breath first.

“I would be angry too,” he tries to form some connection since he has brothers too. “I would cry, but then I would think about what they would want. And we as siblings have a better understanding of what they want, don’t you think? Because we have that connection no one else could feel?”

You nod. “That’s why I know he’d want to live…” you trail off and he finally approaches you and grabs your shoulder, making you find your breath and ease some tension off your shoulders.

“You really think that? You don’t think he’d let his students do anything possible so you could all win? Even if not for them then for you and Satori?” Choso pulls right at your heartstrings, causing you to break and sob because in the back of your mind you know that’s all he’d want.

“But,” you try to argue in your brother's defense. “Why did they have to use him like that? Why didn’t he tell me?” You ask softly and then face him.

“Because it wasn’t easy for him either I’m guessing…” Choso coos and gently cradles your face to wipe away your cheeks. “Because he knew if he told you, you’d fight back and it would just make it harder,” he shares because as an older brother that’s what he’d feel.

“I’d fight to keep him alive because that’s what he deserves,” you argue back but that anger you held onto moments ago is faltering. “Because…I wouldn’t want him to leave me alone.”

Choso sighs. “I know, but now you have to support the decisions he made. He’d trust you to do that, right?”

You nod softly even if you don’t want to accept it and the agony in you takes over the next words that come out. “But he promised…he promised to protect me and be with me.”

“He always will,” Choso assures your crying heart. “For as long you live, but now he’ll be closer to you. That’s why you need to have a strong heart, hm?”

And with those beautiful and soft words, the fight you were so stubborn to have falls completely and all that’s left is a grieving woman that’s left small and broken, and that only Choso could comfort.

“Strong heart,” he whispers and places his hand over your heart.

You gently cup his hand and keep it pressed on your chest as you fall to your knees and let yourself cry over the loss of your older brother, Satoru.

“Strong heart,” Choso’s words echo as he falls on his knees with you to be close and comfort you in the way he knew how. In an intimate way that gives you strength to keep fighting no matter how much you lost already because you both know that the fight for life and survival of humanity is not over yet.

At least not for the ones still standing, but for Choso and you without the strength of your techniques, it is…

——

*A COUPLE MONTHS LATER*

A peaceful silence fills the night and you and Choso take advantage of it to find peace and time to relax after being caught up in such a hectic but blissful day.

You find time for your passion that still burns hot after having twins and losing so much, but neither of you struggle to sleep when you can. Not anymore. Those sleepless nights where you admired the serene sky are gone, but, and this is important, the reason why you find sleep so easily wakes you both up with their crying that rings loudly throughout your house.

“It’s okay,” Choso whispers hoarsely. “I’ll go, it’s just Tsukuyomi crying.”

You wipe your eyes and squint nonetheless to look at him through the darkness of the room. “Are you sure?” You probe. “I don’t mind.”

Choso hums and caresses the back of your head so you’d get lulled back to sleep. “Yeah, I’ll go. Go back to sleep.”

You hesitate but your exhaustion wins this fight so you drop your head back on your pillow, letting Choso walk into the twin's room and find his baby boy wailing while his twin sister sleeps throughout it on the cradle beside his.

“Tsu,” Choso coos as he turns a lamp on so the baby can see that he doesn’t need to cry anymore because his father heard his cry.

“What's wrong, hm?” Choso asks as if the three-month-old baby would answer him—well in some ways he does because those sharp cries turn to whimpers the moment Choso picks him up.

“I know you’re not hungry,” he speaks softly but clearly to his baby because he read that’s what’s good for them to hear—“your mother just fed you before bed. And you don’t smell like your diaper is full either.”

The baby boy blinks repeatedly and watches his father with a trembling lip. He continues to breathe heavily, leaving Choso confused about how to comfort him. He knows it doesn’t take much, but he can’t find a way to comfort him, not the way you can.

You were so loving right away—not that he wasn’t, he cried when he saw the twins for the first time, and that need to protect them only heightened when he held them both for the first time. He would die for them, he’d kill for them too if the need arose. It’s just…he doesn’t feel that connection to them.

He doesn’t know why. He aches to feel it, to know right away what it is they need in the same way you know without as much as double thinking, but he’s struggled and it’s killing him.

He thought that he would feel that instant bond with his son at least because all he had was brothers after all, but that failed to manifest with his son.

They also have your eyes and he loves to get lost in them. They share your unique white hair too, he’s failed to hold onto that bond he now aches for. So maybe having you tend to baby Tsukuyomi would be the best thing, you would know how to put him back to sleep. He can’t if it doesn’t involve a bottle of warm milk.

“Why don’t we get your mother,” he tells the baby boy. “Hm?” He hums and doesn’t wait for a response now before turning off the light.

However, the moment the room is dark Tsukuyomi jumps and begins to cry, making Choso quickly turn the light back on so the cries won’t wake Suki up and lead him to more trouble.

“It’s all right,” Choso soothes the baby boy heaving and pouting. “You’re all right.”

Choso wipes away the little tears rolling down his round cheeks before he starts gently rocking him. “See I’m here. Did you have a nightmare?”

Tsukuyomi lets out a shaky breath and Choso now gently caresses his head in the same way he caresses your scalp when you’re cuddling in bed, and that seems to comfort baby Tsukuyomi the same way it calms you down.

“Yeah,” Choso laughs softly. “Your mother likes that too.” He smiles gently and confesses to his son. “Your mother has nightmares too. I’m sure she’ll tell you why she does when you’re older, but as for now, when she has them I caress her head too.”

Tsukuyomi blinks and his pupils dilate while his lips suddenly lift to a gentle smile. Choso can't help but smile proudly over that simple but beautiful gesture before he’s caught by surprise by Tsukuyomi stretching out his chubby arms and grabbing his face.

“Oh,” Choso gasps and holds his son's gaze, while Tsukuyomi coos and smiles brighter as if admiring his father.

Choso’s breath catches and Tsukuyomi refuses to let him go just yet and insists on keeping him close. In that moment sparking that forever bond Choso was aching for.

“You’re one of the best things that’s happened to me,” Choso tells his son with tears running down his cheeks. “You, your mother, your sisters, and your uncle Yuji. I’m grateful every day to your mother for gifting me a chance to be in your life. I love you Tsukuyomi.”

The baby boy drops his arms and wipes his eyes before snuggling his head against Choso’s chest and yawning, leading Choso to rock him back to sleep once and for all.

However, instead of returning him to his crib he picks up baby Suki too and lays the twins on your bed instead to keep them closer, at least for tonight.

“I hope you don’t mind them sleeping with us tonight,” Choso whispers to you, who's only half awake.

“No,” you tell him breathlessly and drag yourself over to connect yourself back to his warmth.

Choso holds you close so you can fall back asleep but as he watches his twins sleeping peacefully he smiles and whispers in your ear. “I want another baby.”

You manage to chuckle and pat his back. “Okay, lover boy let’s first watch these babies grow past two years old, and then we’ll talk. I’m not sure you’ll want more when they’re two.”

Choso’s shoulders shake as he laughs before he contradicts you. “I told you I wanted 10.”

You pull your head back and scoff in amusement. “When you can birth a child then you can ask for ten, as for now let’s stick to our plan, hm? I want more cute babies with you too, but let’s get these babies past two first.”

Choso offers you a comprehensive smile before pressing a reassuring kiss on your forehead and then pressing your head back on his chest. “We can still practice though, right?”

You grin against his chest and nod. “Oh definitely.”

He smiles proudly and returns his gaze to his sleeping twins, finding happy tears return to his eyes, as well as a deep sense of gratitude he can’t hold in. “Thank you,” he shares.

You open your eyes and probe. “For what?”

Choso presses a kiss on the top of your head and responds endearly. “For giving me a second chance at great cost to what you loved.”

You sigh gently and close your eyes before you remind him what you told him several months ago. “I told you I would die for you. It might’ve not been literally at the end but I did mean it and I will never regret it because you are the love of my life. I love you.”

Choso sighs softly and whispers, “I love you too, my love.”

.

.

.

.

A/N- Two more chapters of domestic Choso and Mc? Also, let’s pretend gege gave them a somewhat good ending to that fight. Yes? Yes!

Tagged- @deniseabad1928 @secondary-character-25 @starlightanyaaa @notsaelty @d4rno @moonnime @kodzukein @yozora7154 @heijihattorisgf @elegantweirdorchest @natakina

#fanfiction #damn-stark #sugar #jjk #jjk fanfiction #jujutsu kaisen #chapter 42 #jjk 261 #jujutsu kaisen fanfiction #choso fanfiction #choso x fem!reader #choso x reader #choso x you #choso x y/n #choso x female reader #choso kamo #choso kamo x reader #choso kamo x you #choso kamo fanfiction #choso kamo x y/n #choso kamo x female reader #geto suguru fanfiction #gojo satoru #satoru gojo #yuta okkotsu #shoko ieiri #kirara hoshi #miguel jjk #gojo!reader #jjk choso

[dottie-writes-tmnt]

Two Sides of Two Coins

This is part 6 of my fic A New Kind of Familiar. Tags and other chapters can be found here!

Ruby felt at home among all the chaos and people like himself. Red saw his awe and chuckled, patting his leg.

Cw for attempted suicide

Watching that portal close, Leo stood, wide eyed, for a few moments, staring at where his brother had just been. Mikey whimpered beside him, staring at the same spot.

“Raphy…?”

“Donnie, what did you do?” he questioned lowly. Fishface looked perplexed but he couldn’t find it in himself to even care about the villain right now.

“I-I— it was an accident! I told him to move! We all did! Mikey pressed the button, but he had ample enough time to get out of the way!” the genius defended, voice high and squeaky in a way that it hadn’t been in years. Mikey was shaking, and seemingly braced for something. The eldest shook his head.

“Get us home. You have to figure out this mess.”

This was his fault and he knew it, but he couldn’t let any of that show in front of his brothers, he had to force his breathing to stay even, keep his fists unclenched, voice unconcerned, shaking limbs stiff. This was his fault. He didn’t have the right to get upset about it.

 

—

 

Donnie breathed a stream of curses, pulling into the Shell Raiser’s parking spot, and he felt Leo’s icy stare fall on his back.

“I’ll get started on a portal device right now. Don’t expect me to be at dinner,” he murmured, turning off the vehicle and getting out.

He knew this was his fault, he didn’t need Leo to start saying it. He’d get their brother back no matter what it cost him. He just needed time…

He could work away the sudden ugly thing eating away at his chest, leaving a swirling black void in its wake. If Mikey came into his lab crying every so often, who could really blame him for snapping?

It wasn’t like he wanted to. His head pounded and his eyes burned with unshed tears and every time he did it, and it hurt somewhere in that black hole he called a heart. But he couldn’t help it.

 

He had to get their brother back.







—





Mikey wiped his tears as he watched Leo storm over to Donnie’s lab, deciding to chase after the eldest.

“Leo, just leave him alone, if you mess with him it’ll throw him off his game,” he tried. Leo rolled his eyes.

“He must already be off of his game. It’s been a fucking week.”

“Just—“

“Mikey, screw off— “

They both fell silent when they opened the lab doors to see the genius slumped over.

“See? He’s sleeping instead of working on getting Raph back!”

“I— Leo, we need sleep to function,” he said, slightly confused.

It was no matter, though, because his big brother was already making his way over to Donnie and shaking him. Mikey just left before they could start arguing.

 

And then, a few weeks later when Mikey walked into Donnie’s lab to try to get him to eat something like he did every few days, and the sound of shattering glass reverberated through the lair?

When Mikey stared, wide eyed, at the amount of red on the floor and saw his big brother unconscious in the middle of it all, and started sobbing? When he screamed for Leo, for his older brother, running over to Donnie and shaking all over, and the only thing Leo had to say as he fixed the genius up was how selfish their brother was being?

Well, Mikey simply had to tune the blue-banded turtle out and wipe his tears. Leo was like this before, too, but he thought the eldest was better now. He supposed Raph being gone changed things.

“I miss you, Raphie,” he whispered, sitting on the edge of the bed that Donnie was still unconscious in, the heart monitor beeping. Leo had left a while ago. “Please come back.”

 

——

 

Ruby had never been to a pride parade before, and honestly? What the fuck was he supposed to expect?

“Guys, get ready, we leave in 30!” Raph called, and Leo shoved Ruby into his new room.

“Hurry up and get dressed! We all have to convince Barry to go with us,” the slider hissed, before leaving.

Ruby shrugged after a moment, putting on a jacket he’d modified a few days ago; it had all his pins and a few patches on it, so it seemed perfect. By the time he made his way to the pit, Raph was hoisting him up onto his shoulders.

“Barry said yes, so we’re going to the Hidden City. Cmon, buddy.”

 

And holy shit, there was a city full of mutants (Raph said they preferred the term ‘yokai’, which was weird because yokai were evil) underneath New York. A rabbit joined them at some point and Leo stuck to the newcomer’s side like glue. There were so many sounds and sights and colors and…

Ruby felt at home among all the chaos and people like himself. Red saw his awe and chuckled, patting his leg.

“It’s a lot, isn’t it, buddy?”

“In a good way, yeah,” he breathed, simply marveling for a while.

Raph gave a fond laugh, letting Ruby down when he asked and allowing the turtle to run around after a while.

And that’s when he met him. A lizard yokai with silver scales, dustings of gold scattered all over their figure, and yellow eyes that seemed to pierce his very soul.

The definition of gender envy, in short. And Ruby hated getting gender envy because it emulated a crush very closely.

“Hi there, I like your jacket,” the stranger said with a smile, and Ruby found his cheeks heating up the longer he stared at that perfect smile.

He knew this was gender envy, though, because his mind was focused on comparisons. Even so, he stammered out a few incomprehensible words before he got himself together.

“Thanks. Uh, what— name—“ Great, he was embarrassing himself. “What’s your name?”

The other had an amused smile, tilting his head.

“Mateo. What about you?”

“I’m Ruby. I like your scales, the pattern is nice.”

“Thank you. You have a very pretty name.”

“Thanks.”

He smiled, a genuine one this time, and watched the other’s face soften. Maybe some good would come out of this whole situation after all.

 

—

 

“Ruby made a friend,” Mikey murmured beside him, pointing to where the terrapin was talking with a lizard. Donnie hummed.

“That’s nice,” he said, completely genuine.

“Speaking of friends, have you found yours? I know they said they’d meet us here, but you haven’t gone off yet.”

“Ah, they’re sick. I will be visiting them after to curse all people in a relationship because it is not me. Bitter solidarity until death.”

Mikey snorted.

“Just be home before curfew, Dee.”

“Okay, Raph.”

The box turtle jumped at him, wrapping around his midsection and sticking his tongue out. Donnie wrapped an arm around his younger brother to support him, rolling his eyes.

Leo had run off with Usagi a while ago. Raph was nowhere near, likely speaking with his yokai friend he’d picked up a while ago, a caiman with dark scales and blue patterned spots. April and Cassandra had run off somewhere to be menaces, Raph only yelling at them to keep destruction of property to a minimum.

The two were best friends and their own natural disaster if left unchecked. Casey Jr. had gone with them to supervise while Draxum took Splinter shopping in hopes of finding the rat a cloaking brooch. His father missed seeing his face in the mirror some days.

Mikey jumped off, smiling at the softshell.

“So, what do you think, Nattie?”

The purple-coded turtle smiled.

“It’s the best thing ever.”

Previous chapter

#you guys ever think you have a crush but it’s really just gender envy? #please tell me that’s not just a me thing #cass and April caused someone property damage and cj just watched from a distance #raph tmnt #2012 raph #ankof au #rottmnt raph #tmnt au #fanfic #rottmnt #tmnt #tmnt 2012 #dottie writes

[tea-spawn]

Hello, Season 3 Alex. This new look is fine.

(Everyone looks fine)

Too bad it doesn't last.

You can literally see him crossing over to the darkside in these shots 😭

At least five to six shots of her lurking in the background, murmuring in Alex's ear... For a 2 minute trailer, that's a lot. They're clearly not shying away from the creepy predatoriness of this relationship and I am so here for that 🙌

But yeah, post-SCORPIA Alex is going to be the death of me (haha, geddit?) LOOK AT HIM. He looks so fucking tortureddd 🤐😩

Moral dilemmas, here we go✊

Anyway whoever decided to bless us with more of this duo needs a raise:

They were so correct.

I have such high expectations for this season and I can already tell it's not going to disappoint. Just like season 1 and 2 never did. Especially not with shots like these:

I don't know what we did collectively as a fandom to deserve this great an adaptation lol. I am simply filled with so much joy that, whatever happens, I can safely get excited about a story so close to my heart 🙏💘🙃

#despite my excitement i still had reservations about natla and percy jackson #and rightly so #but this is real unfiltered excitement because you just KNOW it's going to be perfect #I cry about this sometimes #now let me tag so this finds the right people #alex rider #alex rider tv #alex rider meta #alex rider books #alex rider season 3 #anthony horowitz #otto farrant #vicky mclure #stephen dillane #good casting #mrs jones #alan blunt #tulip jones #yassen gregorovich #julia rothman #scorpia

[peridots-pixiwolf]

[Start ID. A digital drawing of Minos Prime from Ultrakill, who's wearing a strapless slit dress and sandals of the same deep purple. He faces towards and slightly to the right of the camera, his head is tilted further right. With one hand he gestures in a vague pointing motion, his arm folded and held close to his body. There is nothing in the background, but bracing himself on one arm, Minos is implied to be leaning against something about the height of a countertop. The background is a blank purplish black, save for three diagonal stripes in the colors of the bisexual flag. End ID]

Shading study that quite literally came to me in a dream two weeks ago, after this post apparently beamed itself into my mind

(also a few edits below the cut! they're very slight but whatever :])

[Start ID. Three different versions of the previous drawing. The first changes the tone of the lighting from blue to pink, and similarly the shading from pink to blue. The second replaces the faint black border with pink, purple and blue, syncing with the stripes in the background. The third combines both these changes. End ID]

#the tags got NERFED so let's try this again. #peridots-art #minos prime ultrakill #ultrakill #ask to tag #organs #...? gore maybe? for the whole ''transparent chest/visible cardiovascular system'' thing. not very detailed/realistic though so #i don't think this has all of the same charm as i usually find in my posts. but i tried my best to make it work so i don't think it matters #also ''not too happy with how this turned out'' is something i've seen tacked onto posts worthy of being preserved in museums #i heard someone say his snakes should be ball pythons. i'm not autistic about snakes so i decided to listen to the masters #i still have seven levels to p-rank before i can meet this guy!! halfway there (lust/greed and 1-3 remaining) i've only had my own copy #of ultrakill for a week and i already have 33 hours in. anyway he's grown on me i think. absolute bi king and only monarch i respect <3 #i think it's interesting how i now define my queerness by being gray-ace and trans when i first only identified with bisexual. it's still #an important part of me even if sometimes i forget. sorry that sounds completely unrelated but it's related to my feelings on this piece #anyway (i wonder how many ''anyway''s i've slapped on so far) i also find it interesting how often people draw him with this body type. #i think it's cool there's variety in how people draw the uk characters. it just kinda feels right here? i know i unfortunately don't draw #fat characters often at all (partially due to being a primarily fandom blog who likes to stick to canon designs. i wouldn't say i have #trouble with drawing a realistic amount of fat even on rather thin people though lol) but i try! also genuinely unsure what counts as like. #fat vs chubby? or whatever? i don't know exactly how the terminology works and a fair amount of minos' bulk is muscle anyway but. yeah 👍 #men are pretty in dresses my final message. goodbye

[cinnamon-phrog]

Do you ever see a take in a fandom tag and you're like HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHH

#it was SO contradictory too ugh. and a mutual liked it! #you disrespect me. you disrespect my whole family #you call us 'stinky poopy babies' #you punched my wife. you kick mah baby you KICKed my FOCKin BABY #you ate our dog. YOU ATE OUR HOUSE #/ref #it's always the people i like too. everytime i want to find a d/ hmis artist or mutual BAM they're mean petty and even a nonce #and mean to peoples with hc's like mine. yes yes it happens in every fandom but not to the point where literally everybody sucks! #aside from my mutuals who are casually into the show you guys are boss <33 #a d/ hmis artist will tell me they don't care/ even like my hc's and i'll feel great #a couple months later and they're talking shit about it or liking posts about why people who have said hcs are somehow predatory #as if there aren't actual predators in the tags and their little supportive minions running amuck. who draw LITERAL cp of Yellow #i'm not mad anymore i've become very numbed to this. i end up losing 'friends' to the point where i don't know how to make them anymore. #'course that doesn't mean i'll stop trying though. but give benefit of the doubt and be MASSIVELY let down. #or assume the worst. be RIGHT and yet still be somehow worse for assuming. #so i'm just gonna not interact. i'll still put my s/elfship stuff in the tags though i am above guilt or shame now. Look At My Post Boy #cuz like if all these people can get away with being petty and two faced then i can get away with smooching puppets #make Love not War

[sailor-aviator]

I think I might actually legitimately be at my limit. Like I think I've reached the end of my rope, actually

#liz's personal tag #it's really not that big a deal I think #it's just been tiny things all piling up #one after the fucking other #and i think i just made a goof at work because i can't find an email telling this lady that i'm attending her fair on wednesday #even though i have confirmations for the other three schools i'm going to #and outlook looooooooves to delete my fucking emails #so i'm hoping and praying that i did actually email to rsvp #or that she'll be willing to make an exception and let me come #i'm just so fucking tired of having to teach myself how to do shit at this job #because there's only so much the people around me know how to do or teach me #and my actual supervisor never sat me down and showed me how to do the things i needed to know how to do #so i'm constantly finding out that i don't know how to do stupidly simple things and then i look like a fucking moron #and i'm so tired of feeling stupid all the time and i just want to cry even though everyone knows it's not my fault #and fuck y'all i just feel so fucking stupid right now and i hate it and now i'm crying #anyway here's wonderwall

[icewindandboringhorror]

Bad news, got back from the vet and my beautiful baby son is going to have to be put down soon, probably tomorrow or the next day, so send him best of wishes for his next few days~ Luckily, he's actually not in a lot of pain (for now, hopefully he won't be) and is acting pretty normal, so I'm hoping he won't suffer at all and everything will be peaceful for him.

#pet death tw #death mention #let me know if I need any other tags #I would post something to help pay for his euthanasia expenses or etc. but I don't know of any secure methods #since I don't know much about stuff like that. I've heard that like on paypal and ebay and stuff people can still get your real name #and some information from their payment receipts or whatever sutff like that. thats part of why I've held off on selling clothes and sculpt #res for so long is trying to find a way to do it that's the most safe. aside from literall yhaving to start an llc and open a business bank #account and run everything on an entirely sepreate thing just so it has no association with my name and etc. #and obviouskly I don't feel like figuring out all of that stuff right now lol #I am busy just trying to make my beautiful meatloaf son comfortable and spend some time with him whilst I can #It's sad. but I'm glad the issues were caught before he was in terrible pain or anything. So suprisingly it was actually a pretty easy #decision. I would rather him go out while he's feeling okay and relatively content then wait until he's in severe #pain or extremely lethargic or etc. So it seems all very sudden but . It's better that way for him. #anyway #of COURSE this has to happen during a heat wave also.. hhrgghhh... #more fuel for my vendetta against summer lol.. Not that it's the season's fault but. something bad happening in the winter #vs. seomthing bad happening in the summer which just adds an extra layer of 'oh yeah on top of everything else #you're going to be sweating and nauseous and chronically uncomfortable!' is like.. >:T #Also for him. part of the issue is lung cancer which has spread and caused a bunch of fluid to build up in his stomach (which is what I #noticed. even though he's acting perfectly fine and normal his stomach was weird and bloated suddenly) #but if part of the problem is his lungs (which look absolutely crazy on xray) then him breathing in hot shitty thick air is definitely #not as comfortable as if he were able to be nice and cool and snuggled in some blankets. etc. etc. #ANYWAY ghhb... send him much luck and positivity!! Really hoping he can make it through the next day or so without #taking a turn for the worst. So hopeing for a peaceful quiet exit and not like tramatic sudden things. etc. etc. #cross your fingers pray to your gods whisper to the night sky so on and so forth. whatever you do that's meaningful to you.

[cookie-dough-writes]

I was never really around for old fandom culture but Oh my god I feel like we need to bring some of that attitude back. Bring back the word squick, I BEG. Some times in life people indulge in questionable stuff which might make you yourself uncomfortable, that's great, it's good to know what you don't like, but some times you just have to move on. You don't need to send a paragraph to someone explainging ummm their [harmless] take was totally wrong or that they're an evil person for making something a bit questionable.

It's good practice to breathe and move on. You need to pick your battles. Telling someone to kill themself over a POST ONLINE, no matter how dodgy, just is not constructive and rarely blows off steam. Just breathe, and move on.

#its as simple as that #and tbh if some 16 year old likes bakudeku despite all the reasons of why people hate it. who cares. #guilty pleasure. #also also side note can i just mention how some people see red whenever they hear like #for example selfcest? #its literally just #probably talking to the void right now #some people get so so tense about like #small things #saving this for the tags because its delicate but some people need to just stick their head above water for a bit #I dont use terms like pro ship or anti or anti anti or whatever #because the whole debate is way bigger than those 3 terms and it feels like everyone has a different interpretation of them #okay so #some times people will enjoy questionable things. thats a given #some times that might be something simple like yandere aus and some times itll be something as complex as toxic ships. #and now let me clarify. because whenever i try and verbalise it i feel like im walking on eggshells #i am not condoning anything specifically #but i used the word complex for a reason. because quite usually there is in fact complexities to when people find things like that indulgen #so MOST of the time everyone is better off if you just go oh. squick. and move on #squicks can range from things like “i cannot see how that ship would be healthy at all. that is not pleasurable to me” to “hm no i dont lik #how this character is written by this personohh haha what if this character met another dimension version and they kissed and made out a lit #metaphor" #and people used to be chill about it but now people go crazy and i wonder if its purely just because it has cest as a suffix #same with oh what was it #objectophilia? which is literally just attraction to inanimate objects. pretty neutral right. but then when looking into it a ton of people #ALSO go crazy and ive literally seen people argue like 12 year olds that because it ends in philia its bad and distgusting and evil #??? #are we just not using common sense anymore. or. #sorry im sleep deprived and im just so so tired of seeing people argue instead of living #can we all just love each other and live parralell to people we do not like

[mooseyspooky]

There it fucking is! Oh my god I have been trying to find a picture of his Angie tattoo for AGES. It's on the back of his right arm, above his elbow! I can't find a clear picture of it to save my life, but I freaking knew it was on his arm somewhere. Ah!!!!

#Okay so let me tag this for myself #Angie tattoo #Angie #Now then let us discuss him getting his Angie tattoo on his arm and his Extremely Suspicious Swallow tattoo on his neck #What does it mean??? #Does he see his relationship with Moz symbolically “higher” than his relationship with Angie? #What about Swallow on my Neck called to him? Were songs like Speedway and Billy Budd sort of... #Like did he want a reference that be more difficult to get? #Was it that if he got tattoos of those more obvious songs people would immediately be suspicious? #But getting a literal swallow on his neck seems like such an obvious thing #Every person he meets will see it #Everytime Moz looks him up on YouTube at 2am he will see it and know #But yet it's take me like a year to get a clear shot of his Angie tattoo #The whole vibe throws me honestly #Like i just find it strange that Johnny clearly had to make a decision in 1987 #He decided okay well I'm going to have a family I'm going to choose Angie we are going to California and we're gonna have 2 children #But then he walks around with a Morrissey reference tattooed right on his neck #And says it's about...i can't remember #I think he said some bullshit about swallows guiding you home #And HONESTLY? honestly??? That isn't just a piss poor cover up it's also just more questionable #Cause is moz home? Is moz safety? Is the love you shared the sense of home you lost? #I have so many questions Johnny

[im-with-nasa]

why??? did almost everyone i knew from my high school turn to some sort of extremism when we graduated??? was it the pandemic??? being chronically online??? COLLEGE??? i just wanna know omg

#rant warning in these tags bcs i am so SHOCKED #using this as a way of documenting my thoughts about this so i can look back on this and be just as shocked #literally some of them are now hard right republicans #my former best friend is STILL with this guy after YEARS AND YEARS OF HIS WEIRD RACIST BEHAVIOR??? #one is trying to transition to be a BLACK WOMAN??? this is a TRANS RACE THING #this person also dropped out of college for being an alcoholic too like YIKES OMG #my ex is now some sort of spiritual “u make ur own happiness” people that is two steps away from cult activity #if i had a penny for every time someone said this to me when i was trying to reach out for mental health help i would be a billionaire #i check up on these people for the first time in OVER A YEAR and this is what i find #lol let me use these tags as a societal analysis of life after the pandy #happy with the people i kept/let into my life now because THESE ARE COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PEOPLE LMFAOO #maybe its just... over self analysis?? self-consumption?? narcissism?? that drove them to this #i know people change and all but damn there go all the happy memories with them lol #kinda the closure i needed tbh #ramblings