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samgirl98 · 4 days

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Mending a Family 38/?

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Jason’s guilt grew as he entered his newly restored Mustang.

He had finished fixing her up that day and had been excited to take his little family around the village.

And he had. He had put Danny in a booster seat and Ellie in a car seat and taken a drive with Jazz in the passenger seat. They made it a family day, ate out, sang out of tune with whatever song came on the radio, and had a good time.

Then, they got home, Danny fell asleep, and Jason started feeling down.

He had no idea why he had bouts of depression, but they were starting to become annoying. Well, they would be if he had the space to feel annoyed.

Jason rubbed his chest. It hurt as if someone was squeezing his heart.

Jason turned on the car and felt the soft purr. He stayed in the car, not daring to move. Why couldn’t he feel happy all the time? Why was he thinking about his old family so much? Every time he felt miserable about his old family, he felt guilty. It felt as if he was betraying his current family.

Jason was so lost in his negative thoughts he didn’t notice Jazz until she entered the passenger side.

“Jazz, what are you doing here? Are the kids alone?”

Jason was about to leave the car when Jazz pulled out a baby monitor.

“I got it covered,” she said, “Besides, nobody can come through our haunt without us knowing.”

Jason said nothing.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” came his automatic response. Jazz raised an eyebrow.

“Uh-huh. Sure, I believe that, big brother.”

Silence reigned for a while. The chirping of the crickets was the only thing that could be heard.

“Am I a bad person for missing them so much? I love you guys, and you are the best things that have ever happened to me, but when I’m alone with my thoughts and emotions, I can’t help—I miss them but feel like I’m betraying what we have. What we found.”

Jason let his head fall on the steering wheel. The ache in his chest grew. He wanted his family to be whole again. Jason could picture it in his mind’s eye. Danny surrounded by the Waynes. Danny being spoiled by his aunts and uncles. By the Ancients, he wanted that. He wanted Danny to have cousins, aunts, and uncles.

Jason wanted his older jackass of a brother. He wanted his grandfather…He wanted his dad.

He wanted his family whole. No, his family was whole already.

What was he thinking? What was wrong with him? Why wasn’t he satisfied with the family he had?

“We have a theory,” Jazz said, putting her hand on Jason’s head and giving soft scratches. It felt nice. “Danny and I think your obsession is family. Until you can have every last person you consider family surrounding you, well, you won’t feel complete.”

Jason snorted. It made sense, but Ancients, did his obsession have to be something he couldn’t have?

“So basically, my obsession is unreachable. They’ll never take me back. And if I do return, they’ll try to take Danny away from me. They’ll consider me unstable, too much of a monster to raise a child.”

Jazz said nothing. Jason raised his head and stared at the woman who had become his younger sister. Someone Jason could trust.

“I miss mom and dad sometimes, too,” Jazz whispered, “not for the people they turned out to be, but for who they once were.”

Jazz smiled bittersweetly and turned toward Jason, “Do you think me a bad person for missing them?”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” was his automatic response.

“Then why don’t you give yourself that same leeway? My parents have done horrible things; they tried to kill Danny! Yet, I still miss them. Family is complicated, Jason. Emotions are even more so. Don’t blame yourself for what you’re feeling, and don’t feel like you’re betraying us because you want what you used to have. We understand.”

“You’re all too good for me.”

Jazz slapped the back of his head. Jason yelped out in surprise.

“And stop thinking you don’t deserve to be happy. You have a family, even if it’s incomplete.”

“No, you guys are enough,” Jason refuted.

Jazz smiled sadly and kissed his cheek.

“I’m going inside. Remember, don’t feel bad for your emotions, Jason. If I’m allowed to miss my old family, so are you.”

Jason said nothing. He watched Jazz enter the house, lost in his thoughts.

How nice it would be to integrate his old family with his new one, but if he tried, he would lose what he had built.

“Suck it up, Todd; you have a great family now. Forget about your old one.”

Jason turned off the car, phased through it, and returned to the house. The ache in his chest still throbbed.

Suddenly, a chill ran down his spine. He looked out into the darkness and felt watched. There was no one there. Jason gave one more uneasy look into the forest and went inside.

____

Tim couldn’t believe his eyes.

“Holy shit,” he whispered.

Tim had a facial recognition program running 24/7. After a few weeks of the program running, he had a match.

La Petite Académie would like to thank Peter “Jay” Nightingale for his generous donation to the school. Two benches will be built in his honor.

Tim observed the picture. Jason had dyed his head red and glared at the camera as his picture was taken. He held a plaque with the school’s name, address, and Jason’s alias.

He broke into the school’s files and read about Daniel Nightingale. He had the highest marks in his class and was considered exceptionally smart. Jason had donated fifteen thousand dollars to the school and seemed to be an active participant in school activities. Jazz Nightingale was put in as an emergency contact, and he found phone numbers. Most important, though, was the address listed on the record.

Tim had a lead. His next stop would be Tadoussac, Canada.

I'm so sorry if this wasn't up to my usual standard. I needed to move the plot along. On the plus side, I know how I want the story to go and end. On the downside, I see an end, which means my time with this fic is coming to a close.

Anyway, I hope you liked

@itsberrydreemurstuff @idontgetpaidenoughforthisshit @skulld3mort-1fan @theauthorandtheartist @emergentpanda-blog @jaggedheart11 @fisticuffsatapplebees @booberrylizard @fantasticbluebirdfan @thegatorsgooseoose @cyrwrites @kjoboo91 @crystallicedart @amaramizuki666 @spekulatiusmuffin @meira-3919 @kilasmess @bubblemixer @lexdamo @wonderland-daisy @mj-arts-n-stuff @amyheart19 @dolfay @the-church-grimm @undead-essence @aph-mable @lizisipancardo @purrloin77 @writer-extraodinaire @charlietheepic7 @sinfulloccultist @nootherusernameworked @coruscateselene @chaoticchange @itsberrydreemurstuff @gmkelz11 @feral-bunny31 @paroovian @thatonegaybitch68 @d4ydr34min9 @overtherose @fandomwandererer @vipower001 @thordottir45 @blackrabbitt3t @rosecinnamonbun @bianca-hooks123 @epilepticnerd @dat1angel @consouling @flamingenchiladadragon @all-mights-asscheeks @ender-reader @fuyu-bitch @ravenswife

#dc x dp #dp x dc #mending a family

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iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia · 6 months

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The Arcana HCs: M6 in OHSHC

~ I know I missed my regular HCs yesterday, so have this random crossover that's been bouncing around my head since February as an extra! credit to @helshollowhalls for getting this idea off the ground ^.^ ~

-- the M6 and MC in this case are also students at Ouran High School. MC and Haruhi are friends because they are both the relatively normal ones in their friend group. --

Julian

Joined the host club before Haruhi hit it off with MC and invited them to stop by for a visit. He saw the costumes from a distance and assumed it was a theatre club

He still thinks it's a theatre club, just weirder and more flirtatious

He's into it. Attends all the events, takes expectations seriously, and gets so into his roles that he genuinely forgets himself

He likes Tamaki, he does, but it's also a little too much like looking into a mirror so he keeps his performances on the other side of the music room, closer to where MC or Haruhi are sitting ...

His all-leather look is so popular the club has multiple plague doctor themed events, giving Julian an entirely new frame of reference for what having a long list of patients can mean

Genuinely cares about every person that walks through the doors and goes above and beyond to make them smile

Has a dedicated fan club

Desperately wants to be let in on the twin's antics, but every time they include him in their pranks he ends up spoiling them because he can't keep a secret to save his life. Still gets dragged into them

Likes to dote on Honey

Has a personal goal of getting Mori to speak more than 2 sentences to him per day. His personal record is 1 1/2

Fully aware of the fact that Kyouya is the reason the club is functional and has a healthy respect for that

Asra

They ... never officially joined, actually. Everyone thinks they have but they haven't. They just like to show up for shits and gigles

And because MC is there and it's fun to watch them laugh

Does he have a lot of fans? Yes. Does he ever sit with/entertain them? No. Do they somehow believe he's still a host regardless? Yes. Kyouya can never get a non-blurry picture of him

Somehow always has a costume on theme though. Nobody knows where they got it. Renge denies giving him one

Renge also made a mad scramble to study up on gender theory after hearing him say that it was a social construct and goes out of her way to introduce herself with she/they pronouns now

Asra and the twins kept a wary distance from each other for the first week. Then they reached some kind of mysterious agreement in three minutes and have been hell on everyone since

Between the twins' total disregard for social appropriateness and Asra's magical talents, nobody is able to see where the next prank is coming from. (except Muriel. but he's special)

They looove to make Lucio and Tamaki look silly

He's got a soft spot for Mori and a surprisingly good friendship with Kyouya. He sees right through Honey's cute facade and doesn't really care to play into it

They and Honey do have a "naptime is sacred" agreement though

Keeps falling asleep in the piano. (not on. in. it terrifies Tamaki)

Nadia

She joined officially as part time assistant manager when she found out that MC was a regular customer and that Lucio was hosting unsupervised. She sees herself as responsible for both

Until she met Kyouya and realized that Lucio was perfectly under control. And that MC was just there to hang out

Stayed anyways because 1) MC, obviously, 2) Kyouya is her platonic soulmate, 3) she likes having input on the costumes, and 4) she gets to fluster girls as much as she wants to

She and Kyouya have regular sympathy sessions about their respective loud blondes. Kyouya is significantly fonder of his than Nadia is of hers

She is unexpectedly protective of Haruhi's friendship with MC and constantly facilitates more space for them to hang out

Honey is scared of her and doesn't know why. Then he saw her own martial prowess and realized he might have found someone on his level

Mori likes her because she doesn't try to change him

Tamaki desperately wants to impress her. She likes him more than she lets on, if only to let the entertainment drag out a little

She lets the twins get away with way more than anybody expects her to, mostly because Asra's usually involved and the end result is watching MC laugh until they cry

Regularly clashes with Renge over aesthetic visions

Muriel

Has never been interested in joining the club. Will never be interested in joining the club. In fact, he has gone out of his way to hide from the club

Until the hosts thought it would be fun to secretly follow MC when they took their lunch break out in the garden maze and spotted him. Once they did, it was all over

Muriel is not a host, but he has a standing invitation and regularly gets hunted down and dragged along by the twins

Asra doesn't stop them because he knows that Muriel actually gets along with Mori really well and considers him a potential friend

Muriel usually comes by when the club is closed to visitors, if only because of his effect on guests

They either get scared off by his intimidating aura or take it as a challenge. Neither of those things end well

Honey likes to climb on him when Mori isn't available

Part of the twins' agreement with Asra involves no messing with Muriel beyond dragging him in for visits. They find that boring and generally stay away

Muriel has 0 patience for Tamaki, who ends up slowly shriveling into a ghost every time his sparkles are met with a dull eyed stare

Kyouya doesn't mind Muriel being around as long as the club is closed. And because it makes Mori unusually talkative

Renge tried to critique his character once. She needed coffee after

Portia

She's not one of the hosts but she is partners in crime with Renge so she may as well be an official club member

Their novel reading skills combined makes them both ten times stronger and it's terrifying. Nadia won't stop them because she's best friends with Portia, and Kyouya's just ... done with it all

Besides, no harm in letting them run wild when Portia's presence bumps up attendance by 15% because she knows half the school

Oh, and because Portia's the one who really took care of the Lobelia girls

What, you think they just gave up and twirled away, satisfied with being nothing more than a mini-arc? That's what Haruhi and most of the hosts think, but ...

It's got nothing on the Legendary Lesbian Showdown that happened behind the school. That entire strip of greenery is saturated with triumphant girlboss cottagecore vibes

She and Tamaki have the sibling relationship he always craved because he reminds her of another tall, dramatic, moody guy

She likes the twins but they're so scared of her general competency that they just bring her occasional pastry offerings

Loves to dote on Honey, but won't hesitate to parent him either and it drives him up the wall. Mori secretly finds it hilarious

Regularly gives tea serving etiquette lessons to the hosts because it pains her to see them doing it wrong

Lucio

He overheard several of Tamaki's fangirls talking about a handsome blonde guy and mistakenly believed they were talking about him

Got so upset when they corrected him that he went to visit just to see who his apparent competition was

Saw the costumes and daily parties and felt the FOMO so hard that he waltzed right in and started trying to out-host Tamaki

Tamaki only sees Lucio's enthusiasm to be the best host ever and completely misses all the other red flags so he makes him an official member on the spot

Kyouya initially objects, until he notices the boost in visitors due to the never ending puzzle that is Lucio and Tamaki's daily interactions (locally referred to as the "Blonde-Off")

Mori stays way far away from him because he doesn't like being told what to do. Honey stays right up close because he wants a front seat for the chaos. This does occasionally cause tension

The twins have an absolute field day with him - messing up his hair, switching out his eyeliner, leaving banana peels everywhere

Asra only enables them further

The pranks on Tamaki ramp up too, because the Blonde-Off has to stay interesting and they can't give the boss too much of an advantage. That just wouldn't be right

Lucio and Renge have a love/hate relationship over his character because her criticisms are accurate and it helps and bothers him

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missuswalker · 10 months

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Welcome!!! Could I please request a soulmate au with Kyle and a fem!reader? Maybe one of the ones where they share emotions / sometimes items from their rooms randomly spawn in the other’s / first words said to each other tattooed somewhere or literally anything that would be fun for you to write??? I literally love soulmate aus so I’m gonna gobble up anything u write no matter what. + I loved your Craig fic so much!!!! Thank you <33

thank you so much!! i love this so much, soulmate aus are so silly and giggly 🤭 (using the item spawning one 🤭)

is that mine? || kyle broflovski x fem reader (soulmate au)

My actually useful shit had been disappearing for weeks. I was constantly loosing pens and pencils as well as the book I was reading for school. What had I gotten from my soulmate? Socks. At least I knew my soulmate had big ass feet.

Coming home from school, I didn't expect to have anything new in my room, but I was wrong. A green notebook sat on my desk, the front covered in random brand stickers. I pick it up, sitting on the edge of my bed, deciding to flip through it. It's not like my soulmate would know that I was snooping.

The pages were filled with neat notes. Scanning over them, I realized they were just about the same as my history notes, just with a little more detail. So we have the same history teacher?

I had found out we went to the same school weeks ago, a South Park Cows sweatshirt winding up on top of my dresser, but I had no clue if we were in any of the same classes. As I continued to flip through the pages, I noticed a page with different handwriting accompanying my soulmate's.

It seemed to be a conversation between two people that went from messy to neat writing, drawings of dicks all over the top of the paper. I look more towards the bottom seeing my soulmate's writing with the words, "stop drawing dicks on my paper, kenny"

Kenny? Kenny McCormick? Well, damn. That crosses Kenny off of the list of possible people my soulmate could be. I was only slightly disappointed. Never once did I see my soulmates name anywhere in the stupid notebook. Tossing it to the side, I go to start on my homework that was due yesterday.

"Really?" I groan, noticing my favorite pen missing from its spot on my desk. I don't know why I liked it so much, it was just funny. It had a stupidly big pompom at the end, frilly ribbon around the rest of it. I end up just using a random pencil I found in the bottom of my bookbag, completing about half of my homework, before deciding I deserved a break.

After, like, three hours of going down a conspiracy theory video rabbit hole on youtube, I end up falling asleep, only to be woken up the next morning by my alarm. After snoozing my alarm multiple times, I finally pull myself out of bed, looking through my clothes.

Would I be insane for wearing my soulmate's hoodie? No, I like living in delusion. Pulling the hoodie over my head, I was quick to notice how clean it smelled. It smelled so much like laundry detergent, I was almost convinced it had never been worn.

Noticing I was already running behind, I finish getting dressed, grabbing my bag and rushing out of my house so I could get to school on time. I pull into the parking lot, deciding to just chill for a minute since I was already late.

Eventually, I ended up dragging myself into my math class, sitting down near the back. Pulling out my notebook and a pencil, I begin to doodle, not too invested in the lesson

"Dude, where the fuck did you get that pen," I hear someone whisper, a snicker coming from the same direction. Looking up, I notice a curly redhead holding a pen. My pen. What the hell?

"Is that mine?" I whisper, gaining the boy's attention. "What? No, it's my soulmate's." He replies, glancing at the hoodie I was wearing, his eyes widening. "That's my pen." I say, before looking down at the hoodie myself. "Is this...?" I begin, the boy nodding. "Mine. Yeah, that's mine."

I found myself just staring at him for a moment, before my lips tug upwards. He was cute. He gives me a bashful grin, handing me my pen.

"I would give you the hoodie, but I'm not wearing anything under it." I say, butterflies erupting in my stomach as I hear him laugh. "That's okay. You can keep it. Did you ever realize my name was on the tag?" He asks, causing my face to drop. "No. Damn, I would've found you a lot faster if I'd seen that," I mumble.

There was a silence, until he sighs, brushing his curly bangs out of his eyes. "Are you free after school?" My smile widens at his question, looking down to my shoes. "Yeah, you gonna ask me out?" I joke. "Maybe. You gonna say yes?" "Maybe."

a/n: GUYS I'VE NEVER WRITTEN A SOULMATE AU I'M SO SORRY, HOPING IT'S CUTE 🤞😍

#kyle brovlofski #kyle broflovski x reader #south park imagines #south park fanfiction #south park x reader #x reader

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misscammiedawn · 8 months

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Penlight Spoiler Reviews (Sayori Part 1)

Alright... Welcome to the Sayori segment of my spoiler reviews for Penlight. Sayori route was originally going to be one post but I had to split it in half due to Tumblr limitations.

Download Penlight (Pay what you like) from Itch.io here

My other Penlight reviews: Quick Review - Nozomi Routes - Sayori (Part 2 - Alter)

Turq's reviews: Hiroko Robot - Hiroko Tickling - Nozomi Zombie

So if I've learned anything about these posts it's that you gotta lead with a hook, so... Doll Route and "Alter" Route or Personality Play if you prefer.

I make no secret of the fact that these are my favorite paths in the game.

@spiralturquoise and I are still going back and forth on the route reviews and at present he has done reviews for Hiroko Tickle - Hiroko Robot and Nozomi Zombie and I know Sayori Doll is on his shortlist, so I'll yield a bit more space for him and be brief in my thoughts so I may devote more words to Alter path.

Because of course I have opinions on Alter path. They're glowing opinions, by the way. I mean playing through that route inspired me to write my recent blog entry on ethical personality play.

So-- let's begin.

The first choice in the game, as noted by my original short review, is essentially "are you going to be an ethical hypnotist" will you speak to the girl or just try to brainwash her. Villain and redemption paths are there for if you try to brainwash. Ethical hypnosis paths open if you try to speak.

From there you can either engage Nozomi in her hypnosis obsession or be a coward and miss your opportunity. With a missed opportunity you are given the option to go to other parts of the school.

In other words "go bug Sayori" or "go bug Hiroko"

We'll visit the pink haired gremlin on the next review.

Let's go see why my Penlight tag is "Sayori is best girl" instead...

Sayori is the smartest girl in school. She runs the study club and she gets about 3-5 hours of sleep per night.

In many of the routes she will appear as an observer of the shenanigans that are going on. She knows everyone's characters remarkably well (with one observation I find she is completely blind to, which I may mention during my Hiroko review) and her resentment for Kyou comes from the fact that she sees a focused and attentive person inside of Kyou but he is so self-pitying and uninterested in his future that he does not tap into his ability to succeed at things with focused effort.

For someone who is under pressure from two successful parents to get into medical school, she resents that someone close to her has the makings of brilliance and no drive to attain it.

But she also admires Kyou's potential for brilliance. She wants to coax it out of him. She just cannot reconcile the man she knows he can be with the person he actively chooses to be.

This is what makes the route work in my opinion. Sayori likes Kyou in theory but is so aggravated by him. Their connection is the most organic of any in the game because it would work without hypnosis. They actually have innate chemistry before the events of the game and this is highlighted by some of her actions in routes such as Redemption where she is one of only two people in the entire school (neither of whom had seen the penlight) who remain friends with Kyou after a significant incident.

But in the Doll/Alter pre-routes, Kyou goes to Study Club and meets with Sayori there. There he sees her knowledge and passion at play and recognizes that she is there purely to tutor other students.

She also falls asleep midway through the study session. She's that exhausted. After everyone else in the club has left Kyou sticks around and Sayori...

...sees right through him.

But he notes that he's worried about her lack of sleep (she admits she cannot get on a good sleep schedule because she will just sit up in bed stressing out and has trained herself to "make use" of time she'd be awake anyway) and, after hearing she intends to spend an hour before cram school napping in the study room, offers to help.

He mentions his hypnosis interest and Sayori does a number of things which amp her to the top of my Best Girl list.

1: She identifies why Kyou learned it instantly but decides that giving him shit about it would dissuade him.

2: She notes that helping her with sleep is not hobby hypnosis but therapy and should be performed by qualified professionals.

3: She refuses to engage with this until she has done some research on the topic and can provide informed consent that doesn't rely on being educated by someone who has an unknown motive.

The main three girls of the game come from different levels of trust and knowledge and I find it remarkable how the routes explore that. Nozomi knows the most about hypnosis and is wary enough of Kyou that she calls the shots for most of her routes. Sayori is learning about hypnosis as we go but is inclined to trust Kyou when his statements match her research. Hiroko knows nothing about hypnosis and all her information comes from Kyou, a person she actively hates.

I had described it to Turq as this "Sayori is the only route where it feels like two people on even footing explore hypnosis together". The foundation feels more stable in this scenario.

The next day after school Sayori has lost a couple further hours of sleep in study for hypnosis and agrees that it is safe and can be a good aid for her and so she is willing to give it a try.

Kyou pulls out his trusty penlight and...

Sayori reacts instantly to it.

Intensely.

Kyou gives her a suggestion that the moment her head hits the pillow at night she would fall into a deep and restful sleep.

And it works.

So well that Sayori doesn't wake up in the morning and is several hours late for school. Her perfect attendance record ruined forever.

She explains to Kyou that the moment she hit the pillow she just fell asleep. She didn't even think to set an alarm. It just happened and there was nothing that she could do to prevent it.

Kyou brushes her concerns aside. It was clear that her sleep schedule had been ruinous to her mental health and so her body was just taking the toll. But Sayori is freaked out because she is an over-controlled individual who is striving for medical school and with a single hypnosis session Kyou has invoked a change within her that undid years of self-conditioning.

And with that note we are left to choose between Doll route and Alter route.

I'll start with Doll for two reasons. One, Turquoise is going to say things a lot more eloquently than I could.

Two... this is the route map for Doll

THIS is the route map for Alter:

Even if personality play wasn't a huge topic of personal interest for me, there's just so much more to talk about with Alter.

With that having been said, here's my "I promise I'm trying to be swift" analysis of Doll.

DOLL ROUTE:

This route leans heavily on Sayori's self-advocacy. Kyou wants to start training for the culture festival and Sayori is coming at a base of mistrust from having been freaked out by the sleep suggestion. When Kyou asks to do the doll suggestion Sayori is very firm about what levels of touch she is willing to engage in (she also notes that the concept of "doll" is a malleable term and shouldn't be treated as a universal, something Zombie Route Kyou could have stood to consider).

Not that her mind going straight here could be foreshadowing or anything...

I have resisted labeling routes by their aesop. I think there's so much more to every route than the focus topic. But if NozoZombie is the Abreaction story then Doll is Boundaries and Alter is Lingering Programming.

With boundaries as a theme this route begins with Sayori refusing to let Kyou hypnotize her until she has enough information to consent and her being firm about what Kyou is and isn't able to do. Kyou says that hypnosis cannot make you do anything you don't agree to, but Sayori knows herself and knows her body and...

...she is terrified of the level of control she is surrendering to Kyou. So she refuses to allow him to have any more, even to deprogram her, until she has had time to think things through entirely. Her boundaries are firm and unlike the Nozomi Trance route where Kyou is being shut out by someone who treats him like a trance dispenser, Sayori and Kyou have an open conversation about consent and respect and Kyou has to live with the fact that this is Sayori's mind and he cannot subvert her will without breaking her clearly defined boundaries.

Which is why I like that this route boils down to "pick a good ending or a bad ending". We aren't given options to break Sayori's boundaries or consent because to do so would subvert the story being told. Even the bad/good ending choice is a matter of whether Kyou believes Sayori is being honest or projecting her insecurities. He never betrays her. Not in this route.

Note this isn't a case of "more story has not been written yet" there are many paths on the route tree which are grayed out as a manner of "wait until future updates" but there is only one option in this route and it is fully written.

Though Sayori is skeptical about the penlight and Kyou's hypnosis she is remarkably friendly towards him in this route in a way which she never appears to be with her friends. Sure she is snarky and has a dry wit but consider this CG from early in the doll route.

There is nothing hypnotic happening here. Sayori is just having fun. She enjoys being with Kyou. She's making fun of him for staying up too late in this scene, joking that Kyou is grumpy when he lacks sleep and that maybe he should consider turning in early.

See... as we will learn in the Alter route... Sayori actually does have a light and soft personality. She just doesn't have time for being frivolous and wasting time on friendship nor fun and games.

I'll talk about it in more depth in the Alter half but Sayori's personality shift in that route is treated so well because all the attributes that would make up her alter persona do exist within her, she just has different priorities and perspectives in her unaltered headspace.

I am spending a lot of this Doll route write-up talking about the other path, aren't I?

In parallel to the Nozo-Trance route, Kyou complains about how he is not getting what he wants from this deal (practice for the culture festival) and he accuses Sayori of being unfair in her boundaries. Unlike the Nozo-Trance route, however, Kyou is being unreasonable here. Sayori notes that she wishes to know more about the penlight and firmly refuses to commit to anything until she has reached a level of comfort.

I love her.

Kyou, falling into his worst habits of only caring about a thing while he can maintain his temporary fascination, starts to think of quitting hypnosis and focusing on tech but his (im)patience is rewarded when Sayori calls him after Hiroko's Sunday Tennis Tournament and tells him that she has no wish to go to karaoke and instead summons him to her home.

In which we get a little more on the level of boundaries, power difference and control that this route has to talk about.

Kyou offers to have Sayori at her home but she summons him to her house. She says she will help with the culture festival and put in the application but on her terms. She wants to create the script and she wants to ensure the application is prepared in accordance to her comfort.

...see, Nozomi is the class rep and must handle all applications for the culture festival and thus would learn there is a hypnosis event that will happen.

And Sayori knows Nozomi has a hypnosis fetish. And Sayori knows Kyou is interested in Nozomi.

So she manipulates the situation to lock Nozomi out of the proceedings because she does not trust either of them enough to do otherwise.

A lot of the trust and boundaries of this route isn't just Kyou having to earn Sayori's, it's about Sayori being able to trust herself and her situation enough to lower her guard. She is a rigid woman who believes she can control all the variables. She does not trust herself and that is explored in both routes.

Kyou and Sayori's time together is not so much about Sayori learning to trust Kyou but about Sayori trusting herself to let go and fall into another's hands.

At this point of the story she is not able to do that and she hurts people because of it.

What's worse is... well. I have to stop talking about the Alter route... but suffice to say it serves her purposes to exclude Nozomi in this path.

I wonder how much she will treat Nozomi in another timeline...

And so, at Sayori's house, she agrees to amp up the doll play from just being a arm catalepsy suggestion to feet and invites Kyou to touch her body to test it.

This isn't important but I should note this is one of the only Penlight induction sequences without a dedicated CG.

Turq once said he enjoyed how Angela DeMille treated sitting down as rising action within the context of a hypnosis scene and I feel the absence of a CG is notable, albeit I cannot quite say why.

The leg catalepsy suggestion, brought about by the trigger "booksmart"

As with all penlight suggestions the trigger is so binding that she cannot stand up after Kyou activates it.

They have such fun rapport.

But this route is not a straight line. It's rising and falling in terms of the pairs exploration into hypnosis and with mock exams coming up Sayori wants to get back to study and is frustrated she's allowing herself to be distracted.

Another reason to highlight the choice not to give the player choices here. Kyou's frustration with waiting is never met with an option to force Sayori into further play. He will always yield to her requests.

He is once again rewarded for his patience by Sayori dragging him to the student council office where Student Council President Akiko, a former friend of Sayori's, takes the application for the cultural festival herself.

Akiko is an oddity within the game. I look forward to discussing her route.

Sayori bombs the mock exams and freaks out, returning to Kyou's house and explaining that she was so distracted by how wonderful hypnosis feels and how she wants to stop what they are doing, deprogram. She wants to stop falling asleep the moment she hits a pillow, she wants to stop exploring this frivolity.

The pair fight. Leaving nothing held back. Kyou accusing Sayori of being terrified that she may have fun for once in her life and Sayori stripping down Kyou's character from years of watching him.

My headcanon is that Sayori has a crush on Kyou and I treat this headcanon as fact.

It is at the height of the argument with Sayori and Kyou both having said things that they regret that you can select your ending:

So my praise to the endings of Doll Route is that they inform one another.

Kyou's hypnotic patter has been programming anyone who he aims the penlight at. Including innate suggestions that hypnosis feels wonderful.

She has become addicted to that wonderful feeling and Kyou can realize that if they have a conversation or he could say "Book smart" and remove her ability to argue with him. Because no matter how careful and well planned Sayori was, her lack of trust in having Kyou go in and remove programming such as the sleep and "book smart" suggestions did leave her vulnerable to lingering programming.

Lingering programming... we should talk more about that later...

In the bad ending if Kyou bullies her into admitting how much she desires hypnosis she will cry and talk about how much she enjoys the wonderful feeling. Kyou is the only one who can make her feel wonderful.

Where in the good ending he realizes that the penlight is actually reprogramming her and maybe they should remove the programming and start again.

And so... they make a trade.

Sayori offers to perform Kyou's original doll suggestion, no caveats, no limitations beyond what is appropriate for the pair. She is willing to trust him to be a good man... and in exchange, Kyou can perform the hypnosis with her full trust.

Kyou even tailors the session, knowing how her mind works.

In the NozoDom "Reversal" route, I had mentioned how the deprogramming scene was the longest in the game and how it treated the trust and intimacy of Nozomi (arguably a better hypnotist than Kyou) taking her time and really earning the scene that we the audience got to experience from a first person perspective.

This is the most emotionally intimate scene because it's the payoff to an entire route of rapport building. This is the initial suggestion. This is what Kyou wanted at the start... and it's being given now and it's SO much more valuable for the journey between the request and the honoring of it.

Sayori's trust in Kyou is desperately intimate.

This is just romantic.

One of my girlfriends is not just into doll play. She's famous for doll play.

Treating someone as a treasured toy, brushing their hair, putting them in poses, treating them as pretty and letting them lean all their trust into the intimacy of your touch, letting themselves be posed and used and cared for...

Sayori is a being who needs to feel in control of her life. Even in matters such as the culture festival (we'll get there) she couldn't bare the flexible variable of Nozomi's involvement.

Her trusting Kyou like this is such a big deal and Kyou respecting her and treating her trust as a gift?

I don't have to imagine that as a romantic action. I feel it every single day with one of the humans on this planet I love the most. THIS is what hypnokink is. Power exchange, scene play, shenanigans. It's all fun and games but at the end of it hypnosis is built on a foundation of trust and a big part of that trust is learning to turn off and let someone else lead.

There's a difference between putting your body in the hands of someone else and putting your mind in them. Your identity. It's a malleable thing after all and not everyone on the planet is willing to be vulnerable, open or allow themselves to be altered by the effects of it.

So to find a person you can give and take that trust? It's romantic beyond my ability to define.

The culture festival is a one woman display of full body catalepsy spreading Sayori between two chairs. Nozomi and Akiko are invited to help run the show and it goes remarkably well.

Unfortunately after the event Nozomi is hurt that Sayori locked her out. Hurt and confused because she cannot even explain why it hurts without revealing her fetish and when explaining she cuts Sayori off and excuses herself.

This ending reveals a side to Sayori's behavior. She tries to control variables and is rigid in how she treats people. She refuses to be involved in any social engagement out of school hours (though she shows up to help Hiroko at her tennis tournament and any route that requires her assistance such as NozoZombie. She shows up for her friends but she does not hang out with anyone) and views all connections as temporary. She knows she'll move on from school and never see these people again, she considers her time valuable.

In talking to Akiko, a person she abandoned when student council became more time than reward, and Nozomi in the ending it is revealed how much this cost her in the end.

Sayori's kind of a bad friend.

The doll ending concludes in the study room with some mundane hypnosis.

The bad ending is where Kyou takes responsibility for a toy and makes all decisions for her. Both students crash and burn and Kyou finds himself burned out taking care of another human being, but she is just too reliant upon him and his penlight hypnosis and so he'll just have to do the thinking for both of them.

Another interesting thing about the bad ending is besides the "wonderful" note that you need context for the good ending for, the hypnosis show is stiff and not quite as successful in the bad ending route. Kyou's display of Sayori as a toy is met with more confusion and mild hostility than the display in the good ending.

...and so... let's switch rails and go back to that original choice.

What if Kyou said Make You Think You're Someone Else.

To be continued in Alter Route... (click for the second half)

#dawn posting #sayori is best girl #penlight #visual novel review #itch.io #hypnokink #hypnosis #media essays

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skyfall8600 · 2 years

Text

Sucked In. Chap 1: In Loving Colour

A/N: Welcome to my first ever Eddie Munson Fanfic! This is going to be a long series, and I apologise if I get any details wrong.

I love seeing your reactions so please comment and Reblog!

Warnings: Swearing

Pairings: Eddie x y/n.

Summary: What happens if you get sucked into the world of Stranger Things, and come face to face with the big brown eyed metal-head you couldn’t get enough of.

Series Masterlist

Eddie Munson Masterlist <3

[0.9k Words]

It has been a year since Season 4 of Stranger Things had graced your TV screen. After ugly crying over that devastating death of Eddie Munson in the last episode, you found yourself even more fascinated and captivated with that world and him.

For Halloween 2022, you rocked your Hellfire shirt and joined your friends as makeshift versions of the Stranger Things gang. Your friends did nothing to stop your obsession, giving you small bracelets and pins for your birthday.

“What’s your take on this one?” your friend said, showing you her phone screen with the latest theory on how season 5 might continue.

“Vampire Eddie?” you laughed and blushed slightly, “I’d let him have me.”

“Y/n!” they squealed, nudging your shoulder slightly. “It’s rather cool though, can you imagine? He’d be the second blood sucking Edward you’ve ever loved!”

It was natural for them to make fun of your first movie crush, you had been so young when Twilight came out, but it seems as though some things never change.

“Yeah... yeah.. laugh all you want.” You muttered, your eyes darting back to the inked pages of your book. “I have no shame in loving fictional men, they’re better than the real thing.”

You remembered your attempts at normal teenage romances, most of the boys you dated often turning out to be disgusting pigs or unbearable to be around. It almost made it even more heartbreaking to know that you’d most likely never meet anyone with the same charm, passion and respect as the fictional men in your heart.

At the ripe of age of 19, you were the last one in your group to never had a proper boyfriend, to never have that desire or passion of needing to be close to someone. You were constantly wrapped up in all your fantasy shows, books and imaginations.

“Oh fuck, its 1am! I’ve gotta head off, see you next weekend yeah?” they said, grabbing their things and heading out of the room slowly.

“I can’t do next weekend, got a job interview at that book store.” You replied, your face falling a bit. Ever since school ended, it has been getting harder and harder to see each other and stay as close as you used to.

“Are you serious?! This is the fourth time you’ve had to cancel on me lately.”

“I know, I know! It’s just so hard to find times, between college classes starting soon and trying to get some work-”

“Save it. I’ll see if Rebecca would wanna come instead.” they huffed, avoiding your eye. “I’ll see you around, text me whenever you’re free.”

You said your goodbyes and were left alone in the silence of your small apartment. You looked fondly at the few pictures frames scattered on your bookshelf, missing the days of having a tight nit group. From 6 of you, it’s slowly died down to just the two of you.

You sat quietly on your bed, trying to not let your emotions get the best of you. You turned on the TV and let the bright lights flicker around the room. You let Netflix play on random, continuing the end of Season 3 of Stranger Things. You knew that you would fall asleep, but hearing the voices of the characters gave you a small sense of comfort.

The night air was unnaturally cold as you slept, causing you to shiver and pull the blanket above you as you stayed cocooned on the couch. Your whole body started to sweat, the air almost thick and slicing down your throat.

You shifted slightly, feeling suddenly uncomfortable with the couch underneath you feeling almost as hard as stone. You opened your eyes and instantly panicked, your room gone and replaced with rocks, leafs and trees.

“Did I fucking sleep walk?” you mutter to yourself. Your eyes trying to see between the trees, the soft glow of the sunrise giving you more colour to your surroundings.

You followed the path, hearing slightly more commotion and cars speeding past. A small milk bar was near by and you walked in instantly, everything was oddly familiar but outdated.

“May I help you miss?” the shopkeeper asked, he looked you up and down with a raised brow. You had fallen asleep in your clothes from the day before, not really understanding why that made him eye you down. Him on the other hand, had the highest, thickest and curliest set of hair that radiated the smell of hairspray from a mile away.

“Um, am I able to use your bathroom?” you asked. He nodded his head to the right, giving you the approval. Walking slightly you noticed the so called store phone. “Oh no way, is this some sort of joke?” you laughed.

The man just stared at you, “What’d you mean sweetheart?”

“It’s a fucking dial up phone! Oh my god, its still ringing! That’s sick as.”

“I wasn’t aware there were any other types of phones, darlin’.”

Your eyes widened, suddenly taking in all of your surroundings. Your chest became heavy, “Do you.... do you have today’s paper?” you whisper on a whim.

“Here you are.” The thick news paper slapped down in front of you on the counter. “21st February, 1986″.

1986

1986..... Hawkins Daily News.

“I’m sorry, WHAT!” You screamed.

___________________________________________________________________________

And that wraps up the first chapter! This is a little side project for me, so not sure how often I will be able to post more BUT there is definitely more planned. Sorry no Eddie yet!

TAGLIST: @preciousbabypeter

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson blurb #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson x reader fluff #eddie munson drabble #eddie munson fanfiction #stranger things 4

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horrendous-bisexual-showdown · 1 year

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Poll 1

Hinata (She/They) by @to-hell-with-good-intentions

Why Should Your OC Win?

Okay buckle up. First of all? Bisexual. Painfully so. She’s in love with a girl and it’s adorable and sickening. She spends every waking hour being like “I get to see Chloe today. I love Chloe. I can’t wait to talk to Chloe.” When she’s actually IN A BUILDING with Chloe she’s a wreck. Cannot stop giggling. Looks up every time someone passes by in case it’s Chloe. She’s trying to figure out how to ask her out but her only ideas have been “Scientists are interested in science just like I’m interested in you” or “Want a raisin? No? How about a date?” She’s the frontman of an emo cover band and also plays the bass. She’s got CFS and uses a wheelchair. She’s a scene girl with an ungodly amount of hair dye in her closet. She burns water. Sets fire to instant ramen. Can’t figure out how to work a tea bag. She’s horrible functionally but wonderful in theory. She’s my favourite. My blorbo. My skrunkly. She deserves to win everything ever.

What is Your OC Like?

She’s so caring. She carries around candies and hair clips in case her friends are sad. She’s kind and kinda stupid and gentle and confused all the time. She loves to laugh and does so often. She gives all of herself to others without expecting anything in return (this is often not a good thing). She considers everyone she’s ever talked to her bestie but is nervous to say so in case they don’t reciprocate. She gets her mom to adopt all her closest friends. She’s failing almost every class, especially English. And she’s a disaster. And autistic. And ADHD. End scene.

Sorin Witherstone (He/Him) by @bonetrix-arts

Why Should Your OC Win?

Because he's a TTRPG character that spawned from an old D&D campaign where I played as Sans Undertale the Horny Bisexual Bard and I think that's very funny.

What is Your OC Like?

This man is a mess. His father is missing and his mother is dead. His little brother is a weird lil guy and there's this strange black cat that just appears in his apartment sometimes. He's in a polyamorous relationship with his two partners; Sebastian Plight (literally just The Lamplighter from OneShot) and Ellis Grayton (a hot hot woman awooga I love women btw). He writes music and plays at a local coffee shop where his bestie Eugene works as a barista. He might also have a little crush on Eugene so oop. He also has a fat crush on the detective sent to help work on his father's dissapearance case; Mysterium Imerty (my bestie's oc omg hi bestie!!). He also is so cringefail but has somehow pulled more bitches than any man that pathetic rightfully should. His girlfriend Ellis is also a detective sent to work on his dad's dissapearance case and he somehow rizzed that cutie wth a southern accent up (god knows how he managed that). He's also tormented in his nightmares by his original iteration which, if you'll remember, is **Sans Fucking Undertale**. Just imagine falling asleep next to your hot purple boyfriend and some 3 and a half ft tall skeleton-ass motherfucker appears in your dream bitching about how he should be the one with the hot boyfriend and successful music career and skin. Wouldn't that just make you want to win a Tumblr poll?

#polls #round 1 #Hinata #Sorin Witherstone

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milkywaygg · 9 months

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The Cosmas REVAMP (Chapter 2)

After saying goodbye to Nora, desperate to leave her alone to stay on her good side, Linnie left the building as he dug around in his pants pocket, feeling his heart drop slightly as the normally sitting bottle spray was not there. Once he had left the building, Linnie turned and hid in the corner of the building to take his phone out of his bag, shuffling the many textbooks that he had brought with him. Turning it on, he clicked on his twin sister, Daisy’s, contact information and sent her a message, hoping that he wasn’t too late.

Daisy? Are you still awake?

Nah. Just cramming for this stupid history test tomorrow. Why?

You wouldn’t mind picking me up, would you? I really don’t think I should fly home by myself. I left my pepperspray at home.

You don’t have your wand on you? Can’t you teleport home?

I don’t have my license yet. I have to re-take the test remember?

Right right. Yea, gimmie a min to find my wand. I’d take the car but mom and dad are asleep, hence why they didn’t blow up ur phone given how late it is lol.

I know I know. I’m sorry. I just lost track of time and…I met someone.

Oooo you don’t say? I’ll be there in 2 mins, then you’ve got some tea to spill, Mister!

Laughing slightly, Linnie kept himself hidden as he shoved the few books that he had pulled out back in his bag, careful not to let any of them smash his wand. He sighed somewhat disappointedly at his wand as his mind replayed all the failed practical exams he had faced, due to being somewhat magically inferior to most of the student population. While Daisy was able to teleport on her first try on exam day, Linnie hadn’t managed at all, and when given a second chance, he teleported with an arm and a leg missing, literally. He also remembered what happened earlier that day during class, where the baby had shrunk him accidentally, and he was left squealing in the corner until his teacher had helped him. With every lesson, Linnie felt a wave of laughter overwhelm him as he failed every spell and counter spell, despite knowing everything in theory. He knew the wand movements, he knew the correct incantations, but somehow..it never turned out in his favor.

Catching him off guard, a loud POOF suddenly appeared in front of him, forcing Linnie to clutch his chest and fall backwards. Daisy, a tall girl with shoulder-length green hair and hexagon shaped glasses behind her pastel green eyes, smirked slightly as she helped her brother out.

“You just can’t stay outta trouble, can you?”, she said jokingly, “What are you doing back here? I expected you near the front door or something.”

‘I-I-I just didn’t want anyone to see me, and try to rob me. I-I forgot my stuff back at the house.”

“Rob us? Shit, if they robbed us, I would have been like, wait? We got money?”, Daisy laughed, grabbing his wand out as she grabbed Linnie’s arm, “Now come on. Wouldn’t want to keep mom and dad worried.”

Linnie felt as if his body were being crushed as Daisy teleported him and herself back towards their bedrooms, split into two different sides. Both sides had a desk for school stuff against the lime green walls, and Daisy’s laptop illuminated her agricultural studies and history textbooks that were lied around, alongside papers and pens. The twins’ beds stood next to each other in the middle of the room, while a single lamp shined in the corner. Linnie tossed his backpack onto his bed and took a seat on the desk, resting his arm a bit as Daisy smiled at him.

“Sooo…you gonna tell me about this mystery woman?”, Daisy pried, making Linnie squirm slightly.

“Well, it wasn’t a date or anything. She just looked so sad and I thought maybe she wanted someone to talk to.”

“Uh huh…”, Daisy said, urging Linnie to go into more detail. “What’s she look like? She got a name.”

“She had this curly, cyan hair and was wearing a letterman jacket, kind of like how all the football players wear?”, Linnie started to explain, but grew worried as Daisy’s smile started to fade, “What? What’s the matter?”

“Not Nora Cosma.”

“Um…yes..her. Why?”

“Linnie, lemme ask you something.”, Daisy asked, rubbing her temples slightly. Of all the people he could have interacted with tonight, he chose her?! “Do you know her well?”

“Not really. I mean, we do have AP Literature together, and occasionally I’ll watch her play before we go perform with the band for half time. Why?”

“Ehhh…I think you should be careful around her, Lin.”

“Why? What’s wrong?”

“Well…she’s not exactly student of the year, if you catch my drift.”, Daisy shrugged, re-counting the last few interactions with Nora. “You know how I was late to first period this morning? That bitch shoved me in the locker in the men’s room, and everyone thought I was some sort of pervert. Thanks to her, I’ve got detention for the next two weeks. Thank the stars I didn’t get suspended.”

“Did mom and dad get upset at you?”

“They did until I told them what happened. Mom’s gonna make a call to the school in the morning about it.”, Daisy sighed, “But anyways, I don’t think Nora’s the type of person you want to be associated with.”

“Oh dear. I wish I would have know all that happened to you. I’m sorry.”

“It’s not you fault. Just please..”, Daisy pleaded, “If you do get involved with her, please please be careful. I don’t think she’s going to treat you right if you do get with her. I mean, you saw what she did to me, and I’ve overheard her a million times about how weak she thinks men are, so..”

“Well, if it makes you feel better, I think she’s taken already.”, Linnie shrugged, “She was on her phone most of the time I was there and looked like she was texting someone, so I’m not sure. I-I wasn’t going to get with her or anything, but I just wanted to make sure she as doing ok.”

“Damn Linnie, you’re a better person than me. If that were me, I’d have let her suffer.”, Daisy said, “Anyways, I gotta get back to my studying. Let me know if the light disturbs you.”

“Really quick, Daisy? Can I ask you a question?”, Linnie asked softly, shuffling in his seat. Daisy nodded. “Do you um…think I’m stupid?”

“What? No! Why would you ask that? Are you crazy?”, Daisy asked, the question sending her into shocked, “Why? Did she call you stupid. Why I outta-“

“No no no! Please! She didn’t say anything to me, I promise!”, Linnie said, his voice getting somewhat high pitched, “No. It’s just…I’ve been thinking about all those practical tests that I keep messing up and today I had a bit of an accident in class.”

“What happened?”

“Well, you know that daycare class I keep asking you to join me in…Dina, that baby that I mentor, accidentally got a hold of Mr. Langston’s wand today and shrunk me with it, and well, you know I’m still struggling to transform correctly, so I had to try not to get eaten by this giant cockroach while the rest of the class searched for the wand.”

“Ooo ouch! Are you ok? Did she hurt you?”

“Not on purpose. The poor dear. She felt so bad and didn’t know what she was doing.”

“Yikes. See, that’s why I prefer pets over babies and children. They can’t use wands like we can.”

“Well I know, but I don’t know. I love cats and dogs but taking care of children just makes me feel extra warm inside. I don’t know. Just…I’m not mad at Dina or anything. It was just an accident after all. It’s just..sometimes I think I’m too dependent on other people to come and send me. I’m just wondering if I’m stupid or weak.”

“Ha! You’re not stupid or weak by any means! Hell, you always make the best grades in history and literature, since you aren’t waving a magic wand or anything. You’re crazy good at theories and stuff, and it takes an incredibly amount of patience to babysit and care for those children they way you do and never ask in return.”, Daisy said, smiling at Linnie, who seemed to perk up a little bit, “Just..the practical part of school just takes time to develop, and everyone develops at a different speed. Some people are born incredibly powerful while others have to wait a while longer. You’re so patient with everyone else, but sometimes, I think you forget to be patient with yourself.”

“I know, but it’s so much easier said that done. I really don’t know how you do it, Daisy.”

“Just takes time. Just know that if you need help, I’ve got your back, and I’m not gonna let anyone mess with you..ever. Now, you should probably get some sleep. We gotta be up bright and early for this stupid test.” Linnie smiled at his sister thankfully as he moved his backpack from the bed to his desk chair, before changing into his pajamas and settling into bed, scrolling mindlessly on his phone before eventually zonking out, tuning out his sister’s typing on her computer. Though he still tossed and turned as he continued to think about everything that had happened at school and the coffee shop, he eventually let his sister’s words soothe him through the night, lucky that he was born a twin.

#fairly oddparents #cosma family #fanfic #au

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song-writer-melo-wrath · 8 months

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It's raining.

I've always loved rain, it's one of the many reasons I don't like summer. It's raining The sound is soothing, it's a fall-asleep-to-it sound, yet I want to stay up for it, so I don't miss a single moment. It's raining On a car ride, I introduce two of my friends to a game where raindrops race down the window, and we cheered every time one made it until my dad told us we were being too loud. It's raining I listen to music on a bus ride home while rain rattles on the roof of the bus. A few other students scream and run as soon as they step out. It's raining In a car on top of a skiing mountain, I shiver despite wearing many layers, and my mom tells me it'll be okay. It's raining I'm in high school, and I've taken off my jacket to dance in the rain outside. It's not the first time. It won't be the last. When I'm inside again, it's warmer, and the rain sticks to my skin. Everything sticks to my skin. I write bad poetry about it later. It's raining When my dad is driving, late at night, another car runs into ours. I'm a child. I start crying as soon as I'm lurched forward and hit my head on the top of the passenger seat. I hear the clang of metal as the other person hits their car three times with what I guess is a hammer. Dad asks if I'm okay. We wait. Strangers come by and help us out. One lets me pretend to drive a car put in park, while Dad watches. It's raining I try to ignore my mom swearing repeatedly while she and my dad try to not get lost. It's late. I have a book and the light of passing lamp posts. It's raining My mom jokes that having an eating disorder is girly. I, a high-schooler who came out as non-binary to my friends before my parents, curl in on myself and yell “MOM” and she's silent and frustrated. It's raining I get scared that if I shiver too much, I'll lose more weight. It's raining My family is trying to lift a wall, I'm on one end, three are on the other. Mom starts to say something, and I desperately cry "I'm trying!" before she tells me to let go. It's…raining. My friends take me out to a corn maze. It's raining I go see a string concert at the school I'm now an alumnus for. They've remodelled the building. Someone who still goes there and me briefly sneak into one of the additions. Earlier, she cried after hugging me. It's raining Christmas lights have been set up almost everywhere. It's raining I sit under a roof waiting for AP music theory to start. Everyone who came early for the class realizes the teacher sent out an email saying there would be no class that day. The email was sent late last night. Next to the classroom, we curl up together under a blanket a friend of mine brought. Later, other students seeing us half-asleep on the floor is strangely vindicating. It's raining I'm single again. Some of them were mutual. One leaves me with fury and a feeling of being used. It's raining After having moved, my two cats cling to me as if at any moment I'll slip away. Sometimes I do the same. It's raining I shiver, but step out anyway. It's raining.

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seelestia · 1 year

Text

[ with commentaries from yours truly, thanks for making this year awesome for me! ✨ ]

I posted 421 times in 2022

That's 421 more posts than 2021!

303 posts created (73%)

118 posts reblogged (27%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@seelestia

@zhongrin

@medeaheartly

@biuun

@monicahar

[ shout outs to my fav homies! sorry for the mention, but you made it into my year of review post, hehe. ]

I tagged 418 of my posts in 2022

#ask box! 📬 - 220 posts

#visitor: dearest rin! 💠 - 48 posts

#reblogs! 🕊️ - 45 posts

#in case you missed it! 🎐 - 36 posts

#visitor: dearest jae! 👹✨ - 31 posts

#anon visitors! 🔎 - 27 posts

#chit chat! 🍵 - 25 posts

#visitor: dearest ri! 🍃 - 24 posts

#genshin x reader - 24 posts

#visitor: dearest brainrot anon! 💭 - 23 posts

[ darn, i answered over 200+ asks?? THAT'S KINDA A LOT. niceeee, this year has been fun getting to talk to everyone! >:) ]

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#for the current banners tho: luckily i already have both ganyu and kokomi! so i'll just be saving comfortably during this second phase <3

[ ah, the twenty days during the 2nd phase of v3.0 where all i did was chill because i already have both of them <3 reminds me that i only have four males out of the fifteen five-stars in my whole roster LMAOOO ]

My Top Posts in 2022:

— 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐅𝐈𝐄, 𝐂'𝐌𝐄𝐑𝐄!

SUMMARY. some headcanons about sumeru men as your boyfriend in the modern ages. (teyvat who? we only know earth.)

CHARACTERS. tighnari, cyno, alhaitham, kaveh, scaramouche/wanderer.

GENRE. fluff, crack, modern au.

CW. lowercase intended, use of pet names, written before kaveh and wanderer's release, scara is referred to as kunikuzushi.

THOUGHTS. this format is a bit different than my regular ones, but i hope this is still able to tickle a little laugh out of someone <3

✰ masterlist.

See the full post

2,112 notes - Posted November 16, 2022

[ everyone, would you believe me if i said that i wasn't really proud of this when i wrote it?? i think it's because i'm more used to longer and more detailed hcs — but this was still fun to write and re-read tho! i stay loyal to my dramatic simp kaveh supremacy <3 ]

— 𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐇𝐎𝐌𝐄.

SUMMARY. they come home to find you asleep on the couch while waiting for their return.

CHARACTERS. ayato, diluc, childe, albedo, alhaitham.

GENRE. domestic fluff.

CW. mentions of sharing a bed (but nothing suggestive), reader gets carried bridal style (diluc), reader calls childe 'ajax'.

THOUGHTS. this mix of characters may seem random, but they just came to mind when i first thought of this concept. also, because sleepy reader supremacy !! <3

✰ masterlist.

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2,176 notes - Posted October 5, 2022

[ ngl, this is one of the works alongside 'while the rain pours' that gives me sm comfort when i wrote it. i still re-read this occasionally and i'm vv proud of how it turned out! it makes me happy to know that you guys like it too, hehe. comfort works >>> 🤞 ]

— (𝐃𝐎𝐍'𝐓) 𝐏𝐔𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃 𝐎𝐍 𝐌𝐘 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃𝐄𝐑.

SUMMARY. depraved of sleep, you begin to doze off and before you know it, you've fallen asleep with their shoulder as your pillow.

CHARACTERS. tighnari, alhaitham, cyno.

GENRE. sugary fluff, established relationship.

CW. reader has eyebags, alhaitham recites a physics theory (yes, it's a warning /j).

THOUGHTS. yet another attempt at writing sumeru men because... just because + to celebrate tighnari coming home to me! on the contrary, i hope you guys will win your next 50/50's <3

✰ masterlist.

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2,880 notes - Posted October 1, 2022

[ ah, yes, the cliché trope of falling asleep on top of your lover's shoulder. i was still high on my sumeru men marathon at that time, so those three guys naturally became my victims. and i honestly don't know why i put the bracketed "don't", but i thought it felt fitting because tighnari was so tsundere-ish throughout the whole thing LMAOOO ]

— 𝐈𝐃𝐈𝐎𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐂𝐑𝐀𝐒𝐘.

❝𝐈𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥.❞

SUMMARY. refers to a behaviour or way of thought peculiar to an individual; but in this case, it's something that they do around you and only you.

CHARACTERS. tighnari, alhaitham, cyno.

GENRE. fluff, a moderate amount of crack, established relationship.

CW. mentions of cute aggression and affectionate bullying (in tighnari's part), the reader is down bad for alhaitham and he knows it, one dad joke about cryo slimes (in cyno's part).

THOUGHTS. finally managed to finish this draft while i was on my mini vacay >:) this is my first time writing sumeru men, so feel free to lmk what you think! <3

✰ masterlist.

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4,967 notes - Posted September 6, 2022

[ the cryo slime joke that cyno made was actually from his leaked voicelines but i didn't say anything abt it, hehe. + it just occurred to me that this was written before cyno's release and since then, my characterization of him has deffo changed a bit after finally meeting him in sumeru. this is making me miss my sumeru men era ngl AAAAA ]

My #1 post of 2022

★彡 𝐑𝐄𝐃𝐀𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐘 𝐈𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐆𝐀𝐙𝐄.

❝𝐘𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐨 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐮𝐥, 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐚𝐦 𝐈 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮?❞

SUMMARY. redamancy is a love returned in full — except you express that by staring at your lover like a madman.

CHARACTERS. xiao, venti, kazuha, heizou, zhongli, albedo, gorou, itto, scaramouche, ayato, childe, diluc, thoma, kaeya.

GENRE. cotton candy fluff, little bits of crack, teeny tiny angst in kaeya's part, established relationship.

CW. use of pet names.

THOUGHTS. weewoo, my first multi post! i may have screamed, kicked my feet in the air, and sobbed while writing this and i hope you do too <3 /pos

☆ masterlist.

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12,214 notes - Posted July 17, 2022

[ here comes my magnum opus of the year or of this blog's whole lifetime, actually. i didn't expect it to blow up sm and it honestly still has me taken aback 😭 (/pos) but i'm glad so many people liked it! i'll deffo try to put out more multi charas posts with varying themes in the future <3 ]

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#thanks a lot for sticking with me this year!#giving out free cookies and hugs to you all <3 #let's make more stupid memories going forward hehe >:)

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1morefairytale · 2 years

Text

Prompt: Yawn

I can't sleep.

Oh, I know that I should! Realistically, I know that. If I'm too tired, I'll move too slowly. My response times will take a hit. And Vors made the consequences of that very clear to me in our time training together. If my responses are too slow, I will be caught. I can't be caught!

But even if I want to, I can't!

I'm terrified of everything! Of course I am. I was locked away, made a prisoner, by my father for all these years. He told me there were monsters everywhere. He told me that people were not to be trusted. As I try to fall asleep here in this small cave, the first night I've ever slept outside at all, I'm trying not to be angry with him.

But why?? I should absolutely be angry! I have every right to be angry that the person I loved more than anything, more than myself at times, lied to me and worked so hard to keep me a prisoner to fear! I can't sleep because my brain and my heart will not stop fighting. I can't distinguish disgust from love. Can you love someone you also despise? Do I despise my father for what he's done? I'm running away right now! That means I do, right?

But no. That word doesn't feel right. And I find myself crying because I miss him. I don't want the last time I saw him to be the last time I see him. I don't want him to hate me. I keep thinking about giving up. I'll just go back. I'll tell him how close I got to disappearing forever. He'll see how I feel for the first time. He didn't listen to me in the past because I didn't explain myself clearly enough! This time, after almost losing me, and with Vors to back me up, he'll have to listen.

"You can't keep me locked away from the outside world. You're not locked away! You can go where you please. Even the children in the stories you let me read go outside to go on adventures! They even have friends. I don't have any friends."

My heart is racing. It's fear. It's adrenaline. But yes! It's also anger! I need to hang onto this. This anger is what will free me. He won't listen to me. If I go back he'll make sure I never escape again! He is keeping me trapped on purpose! It's not for me; it's for himself. Vors said my father once told him that I have a power that is very useful for his business. I can see glimpses of a person's past sometimes and I'm good at sensing their emotions. Vors said it's a rare gift called an Echo or something.

And it's true that the only times I have ever left the cottage was to accompany my father on work related visits. And that everytime I did so I'd have a terrifying moment where one of those visions would happen. And it's also true that everytime I'd wake up from them my father would ask me, in great detail and with great joy, about what I saw.

I used to get the visions only sporadically. Moons would pass and I'd be fine, then suddenly it would hit me when a new maid took up employment in the cottage.

Vors has a theory that I was isolated from the world because the rare moments I'd be freed to go on trips with my father were sensory overload for this "gift". It'd be guaranteed to work. Is that possible? Is that even how magic works? …Is this Echo thing even magic?

I think my father's reasons for isolating me are more complicated than that. I think most things are more complicated than they seem on the surface. Including myself. And my emotions.

Because now I'm sad again. Or is this anger? Is this resignation? Or motivation? Do I ever get to know what emotion I'm feeling? Or will it always be every emotion at all once? Will I ever learn to tell the difference between them? Will I ever trust myself to make decisions if I can't even trust myself to explain what I'm feeling?

Ah, there we go. This is definitely anger! I'm never going back! I will run with arms wide open into the first city I come to. And then the next! And the next! I will meet every person! I will have friends. So many of them! I will learn to defend myself so I'm never helpless again.

And, by the Twelve, I will learn to defend others so they aren't either! I will learn to fight. And I'll learn to heal. And I'll learn to love. And I'll learn how to keep children safe. Not just children, no, everyone. I will protect everyone. I've got a second chance to live a life now that I'm running away and I'll give that chance to anyone who has ever been hurt.

I'm angry! And I'm sad! And, yes, I'm still afraid. But I am not resigned. I'm empowered! I'm not just running away from somewhere. I'm running towards something else: into a life where I can be seen. And if I'm going to be seen, I'm going to be seen doing something good.

I look outside and I have to catch my breath. I've been so afraid of being caught while running away that I haven't been seeing the world I've been running into.

It's beautiful! It's so green! The sky is so clear. The wind shakes the leaves of the trees, sending them dancing down to the ground. It runs invisibly through the grass and makes it dance too. I hear my heartbeat in my horns and it feels like… like freedom. This moment belongs to me. And every moment after this does too.

My eyes well up with tears. Joyful tears. This is joy. If I'm experiencing this euphoria after just seeing the landscape, how will I react when I hear people talking in a city? Hear them laughing? Singing?

I can't wait to find out!

I wipe the tears from my eyes.

And then I yawn.

I think sleep will finally come easy.

#ffxivwrite #ffxivwrite2022 #Abuse #Abuse cw #Origin stories and what not #I really think I could have done this one more justice #I don't usually give my characters Echo or WoL type features but if any of my characters is heroic enough for that it's Saachi #Saachi #I only play fuckups and runaways #Yawn

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luminousane · 2 months

Text

What if, in another universe, I deserve you?

Hear me out. There’s this philosopher from the 1890s named William James, and he coined this theory about “the multiverse” which suggests that a hypothetical set of multiple universes comprises everything that can possibly exist simultaneously.

Are you following? The entirety of space, time, matter and energy is all happening at once in different timelines: It’s the idea of parallel universes. Right? So okay, let’s presume the multiverse is real. Well then, maybe somewhere in those infinite universes is one, or several, where I deserve you.

Maybe there’s a universe out there — happening now — where we end up together and when I close my eyes at night, I’m not dreaming the way a normal person would. Instead I’m seeing flashes of our lives in the multiverse. They’re not simple dreams because I miss you, right? They’re scientific, anachronistic visions.

In this universe, I don’t want a family, but maybe in another, I’m more of the type to settle down. Maybe there’s a universe where you hold my hand while I give birth to our daughter in a white hospital room with pink flowers and fuzzy teddy bears on the window sill. Where we take family vacations and pose for dorky pictures in our neon bathing suits on the sands of a Florida beach. Where we curl up to watch a cheesy movie at the end of a long day in our big, green, suburban house once the kids have fallen asleep.

Maybe there’s a universe where we are middle-aged and taking our child to college and bickering over where to put her dresser or what posters she should hang up. Where you kiss her on the forehead ‘goodbye’ and we drive home in contented, proud silence, your fingers grazing my knuckles, our wedding rings glistening. Where we both have gray hair and we laugh and smile and hug and drink lemonade on the porch.

Maybe there’s a universe where that’s the life I want. Where I don’t second guess everything and I’m not afraid of commitment and of the future and of love. Maybe there’s a universe without all the noise in my head and the pride that makes me so fiercely independent and the coldness in my heart that I can turn on and off like a security fence.

Maybe there’s a universe where I’m the right person for you. Where I adore every nice thing you did for me without starting to resent you. A universe where you actually end up with someone who appreciates you. Where no one becomes a doormat. Where both of us can shed our baggage and curiosity and issues. A universe where we’re happy — without wondering if that happiness is some messed-up Jenga game ready to topple at the slightest quiver. A universe where we’re comfortable and sure, and we have cats.

Maybe there’s a universe where we fall asleep next to each other every night like spoons, like two innocent bunnies — my face buried in your neck, hugging your warmth — and we both don’t want anything or anybody else. Where we don’t want more, we just want each other.

Maybe there’s a universe where I don’t covet so much all the time and where I’m content and where I don’t wonder about picking up and moving to Japan without saying anything to anyone and where at this very juncture, I can just know I’ll always want to come home and cook dinner with you.

If you think of it all this way, then it’s like neither of us did anything wrong. You just found me in the wrong universe. That’s all. This is, as they say, the darkest timeline.

Everywhere else, nay, “everywhen” else — us in the Civil War, us in Ancient Egypt, us in the swinging ’60s — we are happy. If this theory holds, well, by the law of averages, there had to be one universe — just this one — where we don’t end up together.

Here and now just happens to be it. If you think of it this way, nothing is our fault.

So see, that explains everything. We’re not together anymore because of the multiverse. Well, isn’t that comforting?

If you’re sad, do like I do and just think of the other ‘verses. The ones where I believe in love and where I don’t hate myself and where I never feel the need to kamikaze relationships. A universe where we can have nice things. It’s helpful, right?

Because you could have loved me forever. And maybe in another universe, I let you.

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scintillasofbeomgyu · 3 years

Text

➷ a star called you — chapter 42: “big brain era”

pairing: choi beomgyu x reader. genre(s): fluff, band txt, college au, smau (this chapter is semi). wc: 1,1k. warning(s): food pictured; not proof read, typo in twt too lazy to change. disclaimer: NO i do not support idolxidol shipping! this is just for the purposes of the story. an: i'm gonna pull a cia and dip after this so don't hate me too much 😁

[06:11 pm] — “so what did you want to talk about?” you asked after shoving your phone into your pocket with a huff. taehyun was like a doting mother, which was rather ironic considering the way he always ruthlessly blunt with no remorse. you’d eventually concluded by the time you got to high school (and after incidental and intense exposure to japanese pop culture) that taehyun was simply, just tsundere.

subin caught the light chuckles slipping from your lips and stole glimpses at you from the corners of his eyes. you seemed comfortable, or atleast that’s what he was hoping for. the look in your eyes when he had arrived to pick you up from the store was still fresh in his mind: surprise mixed with the tiniest bit of anxiousness that you attempted to conceal with a smile. it was a god-sent that his sister made him babysit, otherwise, if he had been alone, he was sure you would have run away.

his hands tightened around the steering wheel and he sighed, “we’ll talk when we get there. it’ll only be a minute.”

you kept your eyes on the passing buildings outside. the sun had just tucked itself beyond the mountains and night fall was quickly decending upon the city. the sinage of the stores lining the street were beginning to flicker on and the pavements were beginning to fill up with those coming from work, from school, and those heading out with or to friends and family.

the temperature was starting to drop, so you rolled up the window and glanced toward yina, subin’s niece, in the backseat. she was fast asleep, features relaxed peacefully, worn out from all the excitment, the sight making you smile fondly. if it weren’t for her, you couldn’t imagine what would have happened. despite reassuring your friends and taehyun that everything was okay and that you were fine, truthfully, being with subin made you feel uneasy.

the car turned, rolling down an incline and into the underground parking lot of a building. when the realization that it could only be Alice that you had arrived at, adrenline pumped through your veins and the edges of your lips tugged into a huge grin. this feeling chases away any worries and concerns plaguing your mind, to make room for but one nearing reality: you were going to see beomgyu.

the minute subin turned off the engine you would have charged for the elevator you’d been eyeing like a bird of prey, if it were not for the fact that he kept the car doors locked. you fiddled with the handle before snapping your head in his direction with a peeved pout.

his laughter echoed off the walls in the parking lot, “we still have to talk, silly.”

“o-oh, right,” you blushed, slowly reclining back to the leather of the seat and hoping it would swallow you whole.

subin prayed the overhead lights didn’t show the begrudging expression forcing it’s way into his face no matter how hard he tried to remain unstirred. did he ever make you feel this way? he didn’t know whether to believe he did or didn’t was better, either theory made him upset.

“i wanted to aplogize,” he started, gulping before he continued, “for what happened in the past. i was really immature. a-and stupid,” he frowned at the steering wheel, his breath becoming unsteady, “i didn’t deserve you— i still don’t. you opened up to me and told me things, things that take alot of courage to share, and i threw all of that back in your face. i was insecure because to me you were someone... perfect. i didn’t think i was good enough and yet i had the audacity to act like i was”

you nodded along as he spoke, the tension in your shoulders slowly easing. he went quiet for a moment, before he turned to face you fully, the leather beneath him squeaking, “i know i don’t have the right to say this, but i still love you. the parts that are the same and those that have changed. through all these years, i guess i didn’t think about it because i just thought i’d never see you again. but when i saw you again... i didn’t want to let you go.”

teeth sinking into your bottom lip, you squeezed your eyes shut and sighed, “subin...”

“i-i’m not finished,” he frowned. he hestitated, then put a hand on your shoulder, “i was a really bad boyfriend, but i didn’t break up with you because of... you. my mom—”

“i know,” you smiled, genuinely, placing a hand over his before removing it from it’s place. you still couldn’t believe you weren’t guilty, “it’s okay. i was really foolish too. you only did what you did because i wasn’t considerate enough of the way you felt.”

subin’s frown deepened and he clenched his fists. he might not have been the only one who made you this way, but the fact that he contributed at all frustrated him.

“yn, no, you—”

“let’s go before we miss him, yeah?” you patted his shoulder before stepping out of the vehicle. subin groaned internally. he felt like he hadn’t made any progress. after running his fingers through his hair a few times, and making sure he didn’t wake yina, he stepped out of the car.

he was in the middle of locking the car, when he found you frozen in your tracks. he arched a brow, walking toward you and tapping your shoulder. you didn’t even flinch. he followed your eyes to the scene infront of the glass doors to the company.

ryujin skipped out with her arm hooked into beomgyu’s and her head resting on his shoulder as they both shook with laughter. a black van pulled up that subin assumed had come to pick her up, and beomgyu pulled away from her, patting her head with a smile. in the middle of their parting conversation, ryujin reached up and brushed some of the hair from his face. subin’s eyes widened and he could feel your shoulders shake.

subin looked back to them just as ryujin got into the van, but she paused, leaning back to look him dead in the eye. she waved, mouthing, thanks for the recommendation.

beomgyu followed ryujin’s eyes and scowled finding subin standing there. he waved goodbye as she left and walked over to him with his hands in his pockets. subin panicked, looking around him, but you vanished.

“fancy seeing you here,” beomgyu squinted into his car and grinned, “new partner? ready to leave yn alone now?”

subin gave his shoulder a hard shove, “keep acting so friendly with other people and you’ll find out.”

yn and their friends run the campus radio for which yn is the host of the evening show "dear sputnik", where they share stories and hope to create a healing space for all students— even though many don't listen to it. little does yn know, their biggest fan, angel313, is choi beomgyu— the boy they've silently had a crush on for the past four years.

previous || masterlist || next

taglist: @yeonieluvs @feyregels @boba-beom @binniebutter @mango-mina @ghostingtrackone @beombug @neonew @speckled-sunshine @tyunstars @vantxx95 @spookybias @jiminaaaahhhh @angelhee @00-baejin-05 @sbnchaos @youreverydayzebra @ikyk-leeknow @milkycloudtyg @tyundere @rainooo @onigiriyuki @minthoodie @viscoolreal @gyuville @s0ngk4ng @soobinbins @day6andetcetera @woniecstasy @thegracerammy @rae-blogging @kwonthefire @definitelynotcesia @jjunimaze @soobsdior @bbeomgyucafe @jakeycore @hoshi4k @lovebeomb @milkochaa @tonightletspretend @hseungace @msxflower @nyfwyeonjun @witheeseung @mxxniechxld @nycol-ie @wonhaotrsh (send an ask to be added!!)

#txt imagines #txt scenarios #moacabin #lsn.works #hybenet #txt smau #beomgyu imagines #beomgyu scenarios #beomgyu smau #txt fluff #txt crack #beomgyu fluff #beomgyu crack #txt x reader #beomgyu x reader #txt text au series

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some-dr-writings · 3 years

Text

Shuichi, Kokichi and Nagito’s crush likes napping on his lap during breaks

Shuichi Saihara:

· Ah yes, the Super High School Level Astronomer, it was no wonder Kaito would be friends with such a person, and whoever Kaito was friends with, all his other friends would be friends with them as well, that was how Shuichi had met you. Often in those nightly training sessions, for a break Kaito, Shuichi, Maki and whoever else felt like joining them that evening would jog around till finding you, telescope by your side. You’d speak of the stars, of legends that surrounded them, of how travelers of old navigated the world through them, how stars were born, what there different colors meant, and so much more. Folklore, history, science, didn’t matter, you knew and continued to learn about each and any possible aspect you could about those specks of light. However, you were rather quiet outside of those moments, though you weren’t closed off. It was more so, if you weren’t speaking of stars you’d just so intently listen to others.

· … Maybe that’s how or why it happened? More often than not, when at school you were rather drowsy. You were often out, camping in the mountains away from the harsh city lights so when you were at school it was nice. When you were around, Shuichi made sure to spend time with you. You were able to speak so much without words, it was fun trying to interpret your expressions. Truthfully Shuichi didn’t think much of it at first, it was just how you were, quiet, yet outgoing, bubbly even. Others however had a more difficult time understanding you, somehow they didn’t notice the many little nuances that made up you, your slightest shift of expression or tilt of the head, your body language, how you spoke more so with your eyes, engaging in the conversations in your own way. How others couldn’t Shuichi had no idea at first, you were captivating, how could they NOT notice!?

· At first he had thought it was simply him being a detective, often having to interpret and read people through his work with his Uncle, but… that was not quite it, there was more to this. I didn’t come naturally, he WANTED to understand you. He found himself drawn to you, your gravity too powerful for him to even consider resisting. And it seemed the same could be said for you too. Whenever break rolled around, no matter how short it may be, you’d always seek him out. Due to more often than not being awake through the night you’d nap, but Shuichi didn’t mind, not even when you used his shoulder or lap as a pillow. He’d read his novels aloud to you, or if he was working through a case, walk through his logic aloud, he’d just speak even if you were asleep, something in him just knew you were still taking this all in.

· Even if he was somehow one of the few people who understood you, he wondered how you had even seen him yet. You were like a supernova in his eyes, so bright, so stunning, so colorful, leaving only beauty and wonder in your wake, how did you notice him? By chance did your heart race too at the thought of spending more time together? Did you also find a soft, comforting, warmth in his presence as he did you? Did you adore hearing him speak just as he did you? Whatever the case may be for you, he sure hopped it was something similar because he simply wished to your beloved stars above that you felt even half as amazing as he did with you, he just wanted you to know of such a fantastic emotion, it, no… you were astonishing and he simply wished to share and indulge in it with you.

Kokichi Oma:

· “Y/N!” “Hu-AH” You groaned, shakily pushing yourself off the ground. Then you noticed all your items had slipped out of your bookbag. You sighed, seeing all your papers had fallen out of your folders as well. “Geez, Y/N, I didn’t know you were so clumsy!” “Ah, just tired today I guess.” You noticed how Kokichi kept taking glances to you as he helped gather your items. Not surprising considering you literally just tumbled down a flight of stairs. Before you knew it all your supplied had already been collected and placed back in your bag. That was really quick. You winced as you stood up. Your knees almost collapsed under you and Kokichi was in the position to catch you should you have fallen but thankfully you were able to do so yourself. “Hey, hey! Where are you going?” “Oh, uh… umm.” You thought and thought but couldn’t remember. It was so hard, you felt like your mind was swimming and swirling, all thoughts fuzzy and difficult to reach.

· Then suddenly you were being dragged along by the hand. “What the-” “You are coming with me! This’ll be fun! Especially if you have nothing better to do!” You were completely confused but more so shocked from the whole situation so you couldn’t really bring yourself to try to stop or ask where you were even going.

· Koichi just kept running around, getting you completely lost. Eventually though he let go, dashing a few paces forward before tumbling and falling. “O-Oma!?” He simply laughed, sitting up. He hummed as the wind rolled past swaying his hair as he looked up to the sky. “Oh, Y/N, Y/N! Look at that!” You were confused looking up to the sky where he was pointing. “Ugh, you can’t see it from there, sit down already!” Taking your arm, he playfully tugged on it, but even that was enough to send you falling. Even with you sprawled across his lap, he managed to scooch over enough so just your head was there. “Perfect! Now, that cloud looks like Gonta; giant, kinda dumb, soft. And that one-” You were… quite puzzled. Clouds? Of all things? That was what he wanted to show you? You heard Kokichi speaking, but it was all noise to you, it held no meaning. You just listened as he droned on and pointed, the shadow of his outstretched arm conveniently covering your eyes.

· You never really noticed how nice and soft Kokichi’s voice could be. Then again, he was always so loud or quiet, constantly shifting tone you never got the chance to just hear it… It was… rather pleasant. You wanted to hear him longer, engage in whatever game he was playing but so quickly your eyes drooped and all our senses simply lulled to nothing.

· Then it was evening. At first the sight of those orange and purple hues confused you, but then- “Y/N, you’re alive! It’s been twenty years and Miu’s army of robots have taken over! We need you to join the resistance!” He couldn’t help but laugh at your absolutely baffled expression. “But that’s a lie.” “… oh yeah… Wait…” You suddenly completely awakened, abruptly sitting up. “It’s evening already!? Did we skip class!?” “It’s whateves, Y/N. Hope’s Peak doesn’t care if we skip class.” “No, not that!” You sighed, burrowing your face into your hands and mumbled to yourself. “I didn’t take the new meds again. Of course, I didn’t.” Huh, new medicine was it. Kokichi smirked, dragging you up onto your feet. “C’mon! You’ll make us late for dinner!”

· The next several weeks were like that. No matter what you did you’d always end up napping on Kokichi’s lap at some point. This was much needed. Your therapist had been fired so you had to start all over with someone new, who wanted to give you new medicine meaning new side affects that could only be worked around via time management. It was a process trying to work out what amount you needed and what not. Napping with Kokichi was just about the only solace you had gotten in the chaos. When you had found a good balance of medication no longer were you exhausted in the day or losing sleep at night. It was great though, admittedly you missed it.

· It had been about a week or so since your medication seemed to stable out and all was well with you once more. The bells for break had tolled and you left class. Break wasn’t long, but you didn’t care. Hearing shrieks and screams of terror and that ‘Nishishi” you knew you were close. Seeing Kokichi make his escape you simply went to one of the benches outside. And there you waited.

· You still waited even after the bells signaling the end of break had tolled. “Oh? Y/N actually skipping class!? What has this world come too!? Soon the sky will be falling!” Seeing he wasn’t lying per say and just exaggerating you decided to answer. “I haven’t taken my nap yet.” You took his hand, pulling him onto the bench and you placed your head atop his lap. Though you weren’t not tired, a mid-day nap in the sun just felt so nice.

· Thankfully for Kokichi, you were asleep so you couldn’t see his giddy smile. Though with this seemingly becoming the new norm you’d likely catch him one of these days. For now he’d just indulge in this moment with you, his crush and worry about that when it happens.

Nagito Komaeda:

· Though you were an Ultimate, an amazing person who could take care of themself just fine, Nagito worried about you. You slept, a lot. No matter when or where you could find a place to nap should you want too. It wasn’t all the time though, Nagito still had many conversations with you and had gotten to see your talent firsthand, an extraordinary sight! When you were awake, you’d spend much of your time with him, often over analyzing him trying to see if there was a scientific cause for the outlandish phenomena that was his luck. Not surprising since you were a scientist. At times Nagito wondered if your mind worked so hard when you were awake, trying to solve every last mystery the world had to offer, that drove you to exhaustion so quickly. That would explain how you could be so excitedly chatting away about one theory of yours or another only for you to suddenly fall over, knocked out. Thankfully it seemed Nagito’s luck would kick in moments like that so he could catch you before your face smashed into the ground.

· Always following you around, trying to keep your drowsy tendency from getting you into danger, from just always being beside he had become your assistant of sorts. Though he would never dare to insist on it, he always sneakily became the one to carry your stuff around in the end, even if you had started your journey with them. Taking you by your shoulders he’d steer you away from bumping into other people or objects. He would take your hand, but he felt unworthy of such an honor unless you decided he could and he knew if he did a bright scarlet would erupt on his cheeks and his heart would pick up in pace, things you surely would notice with your keen eye. When you were awake, nothing could get past you, so Nagito would have to be extra careful. He couldn’t let you figure out his feelings. He simply didn’t have it in him to confess and he was garbage, surely you wouldn’t reciprocate his feelings, but if you did somehow, it’s not like he would deny you, someone like him had no right to deny an Ultimate, or so he thought at least.

· Although… Nagito couldn’t help his feelings seeping out, no matter how much he had tried to keep them inside. Often, he was just talking and suddenly he’d be complimenting you and about to say he loved you and he’d have to cut himself off by causing an ‘accident’ like tripping over chairs or abruptly changing his words to say something else. He was always left a flustered mess.

· It was just another day when Nagito strolled into your lab, finding your workspace was filled with many documents, many taped to white boards with string attacked to each and every last one, some string simply linking two pages on the same board, others stretching across the room, forcing one to duck, and twist to avoid them all, one could compare it to avoiding the lights in the laser filled room in some generic spy flic. “Hmm, but how to go about testing this?” “Testing what?” “Oh, Komaeda! Perfect timing!” You strolled over to him, looking through some file, seemingly not paying attention to your surroundings yet still avoiding all that strings. “Today I’m studying human communication!” “Uh huh.” “And I wish to test something!” You looked to him with those stunningly bright eyes as you explained, completely captivating him. “The power of words. I wish to see if they are like water in a pipe. For comparison, imagine a person as the pipe and the words water. I wonder if say a person is upset, if speaking to another person was the only way to alleviate the pressure of those emotions, or if just speaking aloud, even to no one, if that’d alleviate the pressure as well, OR if something else would happen. Yes, each individual is different, but there could still be a majority! I’m thinking we’ll go about-” a yawn escaped you before you continued. “about this… by…” You took a small notebook from your pocket, quickly scribbling down notes as Nagito lead you to a couch in the corner of the room. Nagito already knew this was coming considering that ‘pipe’ comparison didn’t make much sense since pipes would still leak, even if with another pipe around.

· He sat beside you on the couch and moments later you rested your head on his lap. You tried holding up the little book to him and when he took it your hand and arm went limp, you already fast asleep. Nagito couldn’t help but smile, seeing you already so restful. As usually he looked through your notebook, seeing what he needed to prepare in order to set up your tests. Curiously he also looked over your notes, wondering how your interest in astrology the day prior lead to this through your connective thinking. It was always fun seeing how you could draw connections between seemingly completely unrelated topics, then again that was likely how you were such a good scientist. As he continued to read, fascinated by your research he began to wonder something. Looking to you his heart melted. “I love you.” Immediately his heart raced, and he felt that heat raising to his cheeks. What if a person were to vent to another, even if they weren’t paying attention? Perhaps because he still had told you, he still would have gotten this off his chest and he’d stop almost confessing to you so often.

· That was how Nagito had begun to whisper his affections to you as you slept. It was a thrill like no other, fearing you’d awake right as he confessed his feelings, yet also endlessly excited by the thought as well. There was more than a fair share of times where he was almost caught, but it seemed you were none the wiser to his words of love.

· “Hmm? Komeada? What are you mumbling about?” For a moment he froze, love struck at your soft tender expression. “Ah-uh-Oh? I was speaking? I apologize if I woke you up.” You simply huffed in response… a-and you just kept looking at him? Oh boy. Did you know? Was he finally caught? What would your response be? What did you think of him? “Thank you.” “Huh?” You smiled, nuzzling into him. “having this… instantaneous version of narcolepsy… Even though I started studying, I could never figure out how to stop it, maybe that’s because I get distracted easily, I- wait, no. No tangents.” You took a deep breath trying to reorganize your thoughts. “It… can be scary, one moment being awake then suddenly asleep. Before you I’d often sleep on the train and go way past my stop and get lost. There have also been a number of near-death experiences like when I fell asleep when walking across the street. I… it’s nice, knowing you’re around. To keep me safe and keep an eye on me. And I guess waking up to hearing your voice, waking up knowing for a fact I was safe… I don’t know, it was just nice, and I want you to know, I truly do appreciate you putting up with me.”

· How… how could you make him fall for you more and more so effortlessly? Well, if you liked hearing his voice when you woke up… maybe… maybe next time he wouldn’t stop speaking of his love for you, even as you awoke. After all, he could never deny you anything, especially not your own comfort and ease of mind.

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utakoi · 4 years

Text

Office Yandere HCs

Pairings: Assistant!Izuku Midoriya, Investor!Shoto Todoroki, Chauffeur!Hitoshi Shinso x Boss!Fem!reader

Summary: Ever wonder what it would be like to be the boss of some office yanderes and basically have a harem? Well, look no further, cause here it is!

Warnings: smut !!18+ ONLY!! (spunking in food + masturbation + dirty thoughts + oral), yandere themes (noncon)

A/N: Bc my brain kept me up at night with this concept and has made it’s final decision on turning a one shot I was in the middle of writing into a series, I decided to write some messy hcs to take a lil breather from long works (evn tho this is kinda long already). Also, if you think this is the last you’ll hear about office yanderes, no no no, I have some other thoughts for other characters

Assistant!Midoriya Izuku

He is over the moon to hold a position that’s the closest to you

Out of your entire yandere office harem, he gets to spend the most time with you

He also definitely has an advantage since he practically schedules your entire day

For example, Shoto constantly tries to schedule one-on-one meetings with you in the guise of it being a matter of business, but Izuku cock blocks him by filling your day with a bunch of other events in order to make the meetings as short as possible, and sometimes, even cuts them out completely

He doesn’t like doing it often tho since he knows you can get too stressed with too much going on so he reluctantly has to give away some time for you to meet with the other yanderes (he’s still kind of a sweet and considerate bby as a yandere)

Will not give you personal space

Stands close to you during meetings, constantly visits your office to work (even tho his personal office is right next to yours), etc etc

Even if you don’t ask him to, he will fetch your meals and give you snacks throughout the day because he wants to take care of you and show how sweet he is (also because he wants you to imagine how good of a boyfriend he’d be if you just gave him a chance)

Now let’s get to the part that just popped up into my mind and inspired this entire post: if he can hide his cum somewhere in your food, he will do it

That coffee he gave you that tasted a little salty? Izuku spunked inside it.

The sandwich he bought that seemed to have more mayo than usual? He spunked in that, too

Whatever you think doesn’t taste right, it’s definitely because of Izuku

// // // // //

Izuku is thankful for his job because of two specific things: he gets to interact with you for most of the day and his office has a built in personal bathroom.

If he were to be forced to use the regular employee restroom, his lewd acts would have been exposed immediately by anyone who happened to walk in; he was never the best at holding his moans and grunts while jacking himself off after all.

In the privacy of his own bathroom, he could be as loud as he wants with both his breathy, pleasure-ridden voice and the slick sounds of him stroking his lube-covered cock. In fact, he’s even trying to be as loud as possible.

Since your office is right next to his, there’s a small chance that you may be able to hear him through the walls. He can visualize you entering his office, concern decorating your features, wondering what he could possibly be doing to make such noises. If you were to open his bathroom door, you’d be met by the sight of Izuku sitting on the lid of the toilet, his hand vigorously pumping up and down his shaft.

And he wouldn’t stop.

He’d just keep going, all the while staring at you right in the eye. He wonders what you’d do then. Would you just stay frozen at your spot, being unable to take your eyes off of him? Or maybe you’d get on your knees, completely turned on and ready to have a taste of his cum? What if you were actually more dominant than he thought and you’d just dig your heels into his dick, punishing him for slacking off his job by not letting him find release?

Fuck, any of those scenarios would be fine by him.

Unfortunately, as he gets close to reaching his peak, you don’t come into his office at all. That’s alright, though.

He’ll just settle with spunking into your coffee, for now.

Investor!Shoto Todoroki

Needs your attention

Like I said earlier, Shoto will keep trying to schedule meetings with you in the guise of it being a matter of business

really, he just wants to spend time with you

During the meetings, he will also try to convince you to fire Izuku so that he can get rid of who he deems as someone deliberately keeping the two of you apart (which, for once, is a pretty spot on theory from Shoto)

Will try to spoil you with gifts and make excuses or pass it off as a casual thing so you don’t reject it or deem it as inappropriate for a workplace relationship

The beautiful bouquet of flowers? He was buying flowers for his mother on the way over and the flower shop had a 2 for 1 deal so why not?

These gourmet chocolates? A fellow business partner of his gave him a box as thanks for his investment. Unfortunately, he’s allergic to one of the ingredients, but it would just be a waste to throw them out, no?

This exquisite diamond necklace? weLL-

You get the point (also, these gifts are definitely inspired by romance movies he saw his sister watching while growing up cuz oof he did not know any means of romance until he met you)

He aims to schedule his meetings with you around lunch time so that he has an excuse to treat you for lunch

He loves providing for you AKA he loves providing for you and showing off how he has the means to take care of you (much like Izuku)

If you were to become his wife, you wouldn’t have to work another day in your life

You can just stay at home and relax

Maybe you can even cook him breakfast and pack lunch for him before he works

That’s basically his dream

He wants you to stay home, waiting for your sweet husband to come back from work

Basically, he’ll take care of your every need, and he means EVERY need

// // // // //

It’s one of those nights again.

Shoto can’t sleep because he’s plagued by thoughts of you. Today, you weren’t able to meet him for lunch because you already had a flood of other appointments to attend (he was willing to bet his entire fortune that it’s because of your stupid assistant’s scheduling that you weren’t able to make it).

So, needless to say, he was pent up. He can only hop that you fall in love with him sooner. Did his charms just not work on you? Do you not like the cool stoic type? Maybe he just wasn’t giving you the right gifts. Were they not expensive enough to impress you? Not expensive enough to show he could provide for you?

He knows he can take care of you so well. You would never have to work another day in your life. You can just stay home, surrounded by luxurious gifts and servants who’ll be at your beck and call while you wait for his return.

And once he actually did come home after a long day of work? You’d be bathed in affection. Kisses, hugs, cuddles... and more.

You’d want him just as much as he wants you, right?

His poor wife, lonely and deprived of the one person she loves for such long hours. He’s got to show that he’s sorry for neglecting you.

Pushing you down onto the bed, he’d run his hands all over your body, massaging your shoulders, pinching your hardening nipples, brushing over your sensitive thighs... And since he’s also quite needy, he’d be grinding down his still-clothed cock on your pussy, showing off that he’s missed you, too.

Shoto doesn’t even think he’d have the patience to take off your clothes. He’d just keep dry humping you, desperate for his own release. The thin cloth preventing the both of you from making actual skin-on-skin contact would make such great friction. He can practically feel it now.

... And yup, the feeling was definitely not just from his imagination. Without even needing to glance down, Shoto already knows that his thoughts of you has caused him to pop a boner.

Hopefully, a quick jerk off session can tire him out enough to fall asleep, but with how much his hard cock throbbed, he doubted it.

Chauffeur!Hitoshi Shinso

2nd most envied out of your office harem for his job (he’s right next to Izuku)

Why? Well 1 - he gets one on one time with you daily and 2 - that one on one time is him and you in an enclosed space

Sure, he may not get as much time with you as the others, but he sure makes the best use of it

He’ll be chatting you up, getting to know you personally in order to make the atmosphere less awkward between the two of you (tbh, because he gives off standoffish and cold vibes, y’all are gonna be kinda tense when he’s just gotten his job as a chauffeur)

and he does it so discreetly

He’ll start the conversation of lightly, talking about the weather, how busy you’re going to be that day...

and then somehow it just transitions onto friendlier and more personal topics such as your favorite places to eat, what hobbies you’ve been trying out lately, etc

And he uses that info to his advantage

If he senses that you’re feeling stressed or down, he will drive you over to your favorite places and remind you that you should relax

But not only does he get brownie points for that, but would you really be so mean as to make him wait for you while you eat a meal or walk around the mall when he’s the one who’s trying so hard to cheer you up?

Of course not, you’re going to invite him and thank him for considering how you’re feeling

And if not, well, that’s okay, too, he understands (so long as he gets his brownie points)

As the boss of your own company, you’d often be asked out to meetings or social gatherings that involve drinking

Shinso’s always there whenever you get shit faced, and happily so

You’re drunk and you’re not gonna remember it the next morning, anyway... so why would he waste such a golden opportunity?

// // // // //

Shit, you feel great on his body.

Currently, Shinso is living out one of the best moments of his life. He’d come to pick you up from a drinking session with some investors and was ecstatic to find you drunk out of your mind. Hell, you could barely even slur out your orders for him to drive you home. Now, you’re pressed up against him as he holds you up and guides you to the car.

Testing out the waters, he cheekily squeezes the flesh of your ass. If you were conscious enough to reprimand him for it, then he could easily just apologize and pass it off as an accident since you were stumbling around so much.

And if you didn’t mention anything... well then, that was the single indicator he needed to know that you wouldn’t remember anything once you woke up in the morning.

To his delight, you barely reacted to his touch and even let out a high-pitched giggle at his actions. As quickly as he possibly could, he opens up the back of the limousine and pushes you inside. You plop down onto the seat with a huff, completely inebriated.

You don’t even register when Shinso crawls in and nudges himself in between your legs.

When the door slams shut, you flinch a little, prompting Shinso to massage your thighs in an attempt to soothe you. He gazes at you lovingly as you look down at him with your dilated pupils. Fuck, you look way too innocent and adorable for what he’s about to do.

Quick with his hands, he pulls down your waistband and completely exposes your sex. Before diving into his meal, he places light kisses that trail from your calf all the way up to your thighs. He wishes he could leave marks on your skin, but he wouldn’t want you to panic the next morning when you see clusters of purple and blue spread out all over your legs.

He eats you out like a man starved, slobbering all over your pussy. All the while, you’re making such cute noises for him. When you gush all over his face, he’s happily lapping it all up, trying not to waste a single drop.

Once you’ve come down, he dresses you back up as if nothing happened, which, in your mind tomorrow, nothing did.

Shinso hesitates when he’s about to slide the panties back onto you. Maybe he could get away with just a little souvenir?

#yandere bnha #yandere mha #bnha smut #mha smut #bnha imagines #headcanons #izuku midoriya x reader #midoriya izuku x reader #shoto todoroki x reader #todoroki shoto x reader #hitoshi shinso x reader #shinso hitoshi x reader #i swear if tags don't work again #tw noncon

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crackheadgeminibby · 3 years

Text

you can't change the past

pairing: steve rogers x wilson!reader, bucky barnes x wilson!reader

warnings: angst, language, TW mentions of depression, suicidal thoughts and abortion

word count: 5.1k

a/n: i rewatched endgame and remembered how much steve leaving annoyed the shit out of me so there. also i 100% took that ripple quote from x-men so yeah, enjoy:)

i do not consent to my work being copied in any way, shape or form or reposted on any other platform

not my picture

You’re leaning on a tree next to your brother as you wait for Banner to finish calibrating the time machine. In the distance, you see Steve hugging Bucky before making his way towards you. You stand up as Steve gets to your level. He smiles softly before looking towards Sam,

“Hey, can you give us a second, please?”

Sam nods before walking towards Bucky and striking up a conversation with him. You smile up at Steve before stroking his cheek and asking,

“What’s up?”

Steve’s eyes flutter close as he leans into your palm before saying, barely above a whisper,

“I’m not coming back, sweetheart.”

Your hand falls from Steve’s face as a frown etches itself onto your face.

“What?”

Steve slowly opens his eyes, looking into yours, before replying,

“When Tony and I went to 1970 for the Tesseract and the Pym particles, I saw Peggy… I thought I had moved on but… We’re meant to be together.”

You feel a lump forming in your throat as you take a step back from Steve, hurt clear on your face.

“I thought we were?”, you ask, voice cracking at the end.

“So did I… But when I saw her again, it just felt like the universe was giving me a second chance and I can’t not take it.”

As tears start to fall down your face, the air around suddenly feels freezing as a shiver shakes your body. You look towards the ground, trying to find something, anything to say. You’re not sure how long you stay there but you’re pulled back to reality when Banner tells Steve that the machine is ready.

“Y/N… Please, say something.”

Your eyes stay fixated on the ground beneath your feet, “What does Bucky think about this?”

You hear Steve’s breath stop shortly before he exhales slowly, “I didn’t tell him.”

You scoff before shaking your head slowly and kicking a pebble.

“You know, Steve, there’s a theory in quantum physics that time is immutable. It’s like a river: you can throw a pebble in and create a ripple, but the current always corrects itself. No matter what you do the river just keeps flowing in the same direction.”

You look up at Steve, before finishing, “You can’t change the past, Steve. But thank you for making your feelings about me crystal clear.”

You turn around, practically running back to your car, driving back to the tower.

Through your tears and sobs, you don’t hear that someone has followed you back and has entered your room. A hand softly touches your back, startling you, as you turn around rapidly, whispering, hopeful, “Steve?”

“Sorry, doll. It’s just me…”, you hear Bucky’s soft voice answer.

You feel your sobs wracking through your body even harder than before as Bucky climbs into your bed, taking you into his arms. You cry into his chest, listening to his heartbeat until you eventually hear his breathing become ragged.

Through your teary vision, you look up at Bucky, now also crying, as he looks down at you,

“He left me too, you know.”

You wrap your arms around Bucky, trying to comfort him while also letting yourself cry.

As soon as Steve had returned all of the stones to their respective times and places, he had made a beeline for Peggy’s house. He had made sure to look up all the information he needed beforehand, so he didn’t have to wait a second before making his way to her.

Walking up to her front door, a bouquet of flowers in hand, he could feel the slightly chilly fall Washington air nipping at his cheeks with the sun setting in the distance.

Knocking on the door, Steve adjusts his tie, feeling the anticipation rise in his throat. After what seems like forever, the door to the Carter residence opens, Peggy herself standing on the threshold.

She is visibly shaken as her eyes widen immeasurably before she whispers, “Steve?”

Steve smiles back at her, replying, “Hey Peggy… I’m back.”

Peggy glances over her shoulder before pushing Steve farther away from the house, closing the door behind her. She crosses her arms over her chest before looking up at Steve,

“Steve, what are you doing here?”

Steve’s smile falters before stutters, “What do you mean? I came back… For you.”

Peggy shakes her head softly before answering, “Steve… I’m married. To a man I love. And I’m pregnant.”

Steve looks down at her and for the first time, he notices her inflated belly. She was not very far from giving birth.

“But, what about us?”

Peggy frowns, “Steve, we missed our chance… Gabe and I are happy.”

Steve lets his arms fall to his side, the bouquet of flowers now upside down, petals flying away in the wind. He opens and closes his mouth once, twice, three times, unable to find anything to say.

He looks at his feet before mumbling, “Can I just stay the night? I don’t have anywhere else to go. I’ll be gone tomorrow morning.”

Peggy sighs deeply before reluctantly nodding her head and opening the door, letting Steve into the house.

As Steve falls asleep that night, he only sees your face from the last time he saw you. Hurt and anger, maybe even disgust on your face. He thinks about the ways in which he will try to win you back, despite the amount of time he had been away. He wasn’t sure how long his one day spent in the past will have been in your life. But he hopes that not enough time has passed for you to have forgotten about him.

As it turns out, five years had passed since he had left. He was confused at first when he came back. The machine Banner had left in the woods behind the Avengers facility had been left there but it was full of dust. The facility, which had been destroyed when he left, was now completely rebuilt and vibrant with life. He had been discreet, walking through the woods to get back to the city without being seen.

From there, he had been able to find a disguise to do research on where you were now. He had learned that you had moved back to Louisiana with Sam and were currently residing there.

As soon as he found out, he rented a car and made his way to you. The road was long but no place on this Earth was too far for him to travel so he could see you again.

When he got to Louisiana, he only had to ask one person to be pointed in your direction. Apparently, the Wilson family was like royalty in these parts. So, he was surprised when he arrived at the house that was indicated to him to find the door widely open, seemingly no one in sight.

Steve walks up the steps leading to the house, hearing someone running towards the door. He is taken aback when he sees a small girl stop suddenly in front of the door. She stares at Steve with wide eyes; she couldn’t be more than 6 years old, with short curly hair secured into pigtails and soft amber eyes.

Still staring at him, the child opens her mouth, “Mommy, there’s a man at the door!”

He hears feet padding their way to the door before he hears, “Lizzie, baby, how many times have I told you not to go to the door a-”

You stop abruptly in your tracks as you see before you the man you thought you would never see again. Your breath hitches as a lump grows in your throat.

“Steve?”

Steve smiles softly, “Hey sweetheart.”

You feel the air thickening as your eyes start to sting. You hold your hand out towards your child, setting it on her shoulder, before saying, “Elizabeth, go see Uncle Sam on the dock, okay?”

Completely unbothered, the child responds, “Okay, mommy.”, turning around and running towards what seems to be the kitchen.

You stay rooted to your spot, unable to move or say a single word and staring at Steve like he’s going to vanish before your eyes.

He takes slow steps towards you as if he’s afraid that if he moves too quickly, you’ll run away like a wild animal. He stops when he’s in arms reach of you.

He smiles a little before saying, jokingly, “No welcome home hug for me?”

Before you can even register what happened, your hand has already hit Steve across the face. You feel the heat of the slap warming up your hand as you clench it into a fist at your side.

Steve looks at you again, understanding that this was clearly the wrong thing to say to you. He softly strokes his cheek.

“Guess I deserved that.”

You scoff, rolling your eyes before asking, “What the fuck are you doing here, Steve? I thought you were going back to Peggy?”

Steve shakes his head almost imperceptibly before saying, “That didn’t really work out…”

You scoff again, “So, what? Peggy rejects you and now you come back to get your second choice, is that it?” You shake your head, “You know, I almost didn’t mind being second-best to her all those years ago. But now? You can go to hell, Steve.”

He stares at you, almost like he’s not even listening to you, before asking, “Is she mine?” He bites his bottom lip, looking next to you where pictures of the child and you through the years adorn the walls.

“She seems about the right age, you know?”

You clench your fists, even tighter than before, which you didn’t know was possible. You can feel the blood gradually leaving your hands as you clench your jaw and look at Steve straight in the eyes, “No. She’s not. Not that it’s any of your business?”

Steve frowns in confusion, “Well then, who-”

He’s cut off as loud footsteps resonate through the walls of the house.

“Hey doll. Lizzie just came running down to the boat talking about how there’s a man in the house.”

Bucky’s voice, despite him being far enough away for you not to see him, travels perfectly to the spot in which you are still motionless. Bucky finally stops when he sees Steve standing on the porch.

He doesn’t hesitate for a single second before clenching his jaw and saying lowly, “Get out.”

Steve puts his hands up in surrender about to say something before Bucky screams, making you jump slightly, “Get out of my house! NOW!”

Steve looks between you and him, waiting for you to advocate on his behalf, but you had stopped doing that a long time ago. You stare back at Steve, almost challenging him to defy Bucky.

As Steve doesn’t move, Bucky walks heavily to the door, making you think that he is about to start a fight with Steve, you say, “Bucky, don’t.”

Bucky stops in front of Steve and takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself down before slamming the door in Steve’s face. When Bucky turns back to you, you let out a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding in.

Your vision starts to get blurry, and your ears feel clogged as you faintly hear Bucky still next to the door, cursing Steve out. Your lungs burn as if air seems to be unable to find its air through your body as your legs tremble. Your head starts to spin and before you can understand what’s happening, your legs give out making you crumple on the floor.

You distantly hear Bucky call your name, but your brain seems unable to focus on his voice trying to pull yourself out of your current state. You feel a pair of strong arms holding you to a hard chest followed by a pair of soft hands stroking your hair and face.

After what seems like forever trying to fight against your own body, you let go and everything turns black.

When your eyes flutter open, you’re lying on your bed and the room is pitch black. Multiple hours have visibly passed but the room is completely silent. You push yourself up to the headboard, looking around you before getting up. Your legs are still shaky, so you lean on your bed to help guide you to the door.

As you walk through the halls of the house, you start hearing hushed voices in the living room. Stopping on the threshold, you look at Sam, Sarah and Bucky sitting around the dining table.

“Hey. What happened?”, you croak out.

All their heads snap in your direction and Bucky almost immediately walks towards you, enveloping you in a hug.

“Oh doll, I didn’t know you were awake. How are you feeling? Are you okay?”

You tear yourself out of Bucky’s arms before looking at Sam and Sarah confusedly. They were looking at you like you just came back from the dead or something. Bucky stands next to you, also analyzing your face.

You frown, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Oh my God, what is it, guys? Stop looking at me like that!”

Sam gets up from his chair before gently stroking your arms.

“Do you remember anything from today?”

You frown again before slowly shaking your head. “Should I have something special to remember?”

Sam nods apprehensively before replying, “Steve was here today. Apparently, you guys talked for a while then Bucky got here, and you passed out.”

You rack your brain, trying to remember what he was talking about before you realize. Your body tenses up and you feel your breathing become ragged.

Bucky feels that and guides you to the dining table, making you sit down where he was before. He kneels in front of you and takes your hands in his.

“Doll, I want you to breathe with me, okay?”

You can feel your head start to spin and your vision becomes blurred, but you focus on Bucky’s voice.

“Deep breath in…”

He inhales deeply, making sure you’re following along.

“And out…”

He exhales deeply, looking into your eyes. You can feel your vision start to clarify.

“Again. In…” Inhale.

“Out…” Exhale. Your head stops spinning.

“One last time, in…” You inhale deeply through your nose.

“And, out…” You exhale through your mouth.

Bucky looks deeply into your eyes before stroking your cheeks. You shiver slightly from the difference in temperature of his hands that are both on your face. He gets up and sees your eyes sending him a panicked look.

“It’s okay… I’m just going to sit down here, okay?”

He sits down on the chair next to you before taking your hand in his. You look at Sarah and Sam, visibly trying to find something, anything to say.

After you all stay seated in silence for about 5 minutes, you look up at them.

“I want to see him.”

Sarah frowns, reaching for your hand that’s resting on the table.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea, Y/N? You didn’t… fare so well last time, you know?”, she says softly.

You nod, swallowing thickly.

“I know but he caught me by surprise. This time, I’ll know that I’ll see him so I can prepare myself.”

You can feel Bucky tensing up next to you. Sam clears his throat.

“Why do you want to see him? He knocked you up, broke your heart and left you for some 100-year-old woman he kissed once.”

“Sam!”, Sarah chastises.

“Can always count on you for the honesty.”, you say sourly, side-eyeing Sam.

“First of all, he didn’t know I was pregnant. Hell, I didn’t know I was pregnant until… the accident...”, you say silently.

You had been battling depression since your early teens, but it had never been that bad. Sam and Sarah had started to recognize the signs of your mental withdrawal almost immediately after Steve had left. About three weeks after Steve left, you had tried to take your own life by crashing your car in the lake behind the house. Bucky had found you just in time and brought you to the hospital.

The doctors had insisted on doing a complete medical check-up and had found that you were 2 months pregnant. You were ready to tell the doctor that you wanted to abort but Sam and Sarah had convinced you otherwise. They had told you that keeping the baby could be like a piece of Steve in your life and it could help you heal.

At first, you didn’t believe them, but they ended up being right. The baby saved you, giving your life purpose, something you thought you would never find again.

Bucky, Sam and Sarah had all pitched in to help but Bucky had realized that his desire to be there for you was more than guilt for his best friend leaving you. He had fallen in love with you. So, when he had asked you out, you had said yes. When he had proposed, you had also said yes.

Bucky was making you the happiest you had ever been in a long time. And you were now pregnant with your second child. You had learned about two weeks ago and you had announced it last weekend.

But you knew that, if you didn’t get closure from your time with Steve, you would never be able to be completely happy with Bucky.

You shake your head slightly, making yourself come back to your current situation.

“And second of all, I need to do it. For myself. But also, for my two children. I can’t be the mom they deserve if I don’t get some kind of closure from this whole… situation.”

Bucky huffs before getting up and walking quickly to your shared bedroom. You sigh, rubbing your forehead.

“Sam, can you try to track him down, please? I need to get this done soon.”

Sam looks at you for a couple of seconds before sighing and nodding his head.

“Thanks. Good night, guys.”

You walk to your bedroom, opening the door. When you walk in, you see that Bucky is laying down under the covers, his back to you. You walk slowly to the bed before kneeling down on it.

“Bucky.”

Nothing.

“Buck.”

He exhales loudly but doesn’t budge. You sigh deeply, stroking his back with one hand while the other turns him around.

“Bucky, baby, please, just listen to me.”

He rolls on his back but stares at the ceiling, avoiding your eyes. You sigh again before sitting down next to him, folding your hands in your lap.

“Look, Bucky, I understand that you’re upset. He hurt me but he also hurt you. He left us both and you’re allowed to be angry with him and deal with his return in whatever way you want but you can’t be mad at me for wanting to deal with it in the way that I want.”

Bucky doesn’t say anything, still staring at the ceiling. You exhale slowly, putting a hand on Bucky’s cheek.

“Bucky, come on. Say something.”

You sigh deeply, “Bucky, I-”

“I’m scared, okay?”, he says loudly, turning his head to look at you. You jump slightly, unprepared for a response from him, much less such a loud response.

You frown, tilting your head, “Scared of what?”

He turns his head back to stare at the ceiling.

“Bucky, you need to tell me.”

He puts his hands over his face, slightly muffling his answer, “I’m scared that you’re gonna see him and talk to him and fall back in love with him. And then, you’re gonna leave with Lizzie and then I’m gonna be left alone all over again…”,

You feel tears pooling in your eyes as you reach over to put your hands on his shoulders. You tug at him softly, indicating that you want him to get up. Bucky sits up, staring at your lap before you reach over and put a hand on his chin, lifting his head to look at you.

You stare into his eyes, also full of unshed tears, before saying,

“Bucky, I want you to listen to me very carefully, okay?”

He nods at you before whispering “okay.”

“First of all, Steve doesn’t know that Lizzie is his, okay? When he asked, I said no. And we’re going to keep it that way because you are her dad, Bucky, no one else. Second of all, it’s not like I’m going on a date with the man. I just want to talk to him so I can get closure. And third of all, in case you forgot, I’m wearing your ring on my finger, not his. And that’s how it’s gonna stay, okay?”

Bucky looks at you as tears start to fall down his face. He leans towards you, leaving a short but passionate kiss on your lips.

He lays back down on the bed before taking you in his arms as you listen to his steady heartbeat.

You look up at him, whispering, “I love you, Bucky Barnes.”

Bucky hums appreciatively before kissing the top of your head and answering, “I love you more.”

That night, you fall asleep with Bucky’s arm around your waist and his fingers intertwined with yours.

When you wake up the next morning, Bucky has already left the bed. You know that he’s either on a run or working on the boat with Sam.

You get up, brushing your teeth and getting ready before heading out to the dock. As you thought, you see Bucky and Sam working on the boat. They’re silent and you know it’s because you’re supposed to see Steve today.

“Hey Sam!”, you call out.

Sam turns towards you before meeting you halfway into the boat.

“Did you find him?”

He looks at you, raising an eyebrow before scoffing.

“Please. It took me less than 10 minutes. I told him to come at 11:30 so he should be here any minute.”

“Okay, thanks.” You look down at Bucky, still hard at work on the boat’s engine.

“Buck, can I talk to you for a second, please?” He drops the tool that was in his hand before walking up the stairs of the boat and stopping to sit down on the dock, not looking at you once.

You sit down next to him, before taking your hand in his.

“I’m just gonna talk to him, okay?” Bucky continues staring at his shoes but nods softly.

“I love you, you know that, right?”

He finally looks up at you and nods, murmuring, “I love you too.”

You smile at him, kissing his cheek.

“I-”

“Y/N, he’s here.”, you hear Sarah’s voice call out.

Bucky instantly tenses up and looks at you with panic in his eyes. You give a warm smile and whisper, “It’s gonna be okay, I promise. As soon as we’re done, I’m gonna come find you and then we can go do something fun together all day, okay?”

Bucky nods, sniffling softly, before heading back inside the boat.

You get up and follow Sarah to the backyard where Steve is sitting on a bench. As soon as he sees you, he gets up and adjusts his shirt. You feel the warm Louisiana air brushing against your skin as you take deep breaths, approaching him.

When you get to the bench, Sarah stops a couple of feet behind you. You look at her and nod, silently saying that you’re fine. Steve walks towards you and pulls out a bouquet of flowers, handing it to you.

You reluctantly take it and sit down at one end of the bench. Steve follows your actions and sits down on the other end.

“You look beautiful.”

Your breath hitches as you put the flowers on the bench between you.

“Look, Steve, I didn’t-”

You stop and frown as you see a purple bruise under his left eye. You instinctively reach up to touch it and he hisses as your warm hand touches his face.

“What happened?”

“Let’s just say that Sam was less than happy to see me.”

You chuckle softly. You should have known that he would have done something like that.

You put your hand back in your lap, trying to find the right words to express your feelings.

“I wanted to see you because I need closure for my family. That’s all.”

Steve looks at you longingly, “You always were one of the strongest women I knew. And beautiful, loving, caring, compass-”

“Look, Steve, I didn’t ask Sam to call you here so we could reminisce about old times. Why did you come back?”

Steve looks at the ground before clearing his throat, “When Peggy rejected me, it made me realize that I left the woman that I truly loved. And I thought that I could come back, and we could talk and-”

“I’m engaged”, you blurt out. You slap a hand over your mouth, shocked at yourself.

Steve looks at you and finally notices the diamond ring on your left hand.

“Oh… I, umm… Who is it?”

“Umm Bucky.”

Steve frowns, “You’re engaged to my best friend?”

You snort and mutter, “I don’t think he would call himself that anymore but sure.”

“But how?”

You scoff, “Well, when you get abandoned by the same person, you kinda find some things to bond about.”

“And it is… you know, serious?”, Steve asks, a hopeful glint in his eyes.

“Are you fucking serious right now? You leave me, abandon me- us, for some girl and then you ask if it’s serious?” You get up, now completely furious and screaming,

“You can’t just waltz in here after five fucking years, after destroying me so bad I almost killed our child and then ask me if I’m serious about the love of my life!”

Steve seems shocked as his mouth stays open, “Wait, I thought you said she wasn’t mine?”

You stare at him before groaning loudly, “Oh, fuck me!”

Steve gets up, a determined look on his face.

“I want to meet her.”

You exhale deeply, calming yourself down before looking at the lake and crossing your arms.

“No.”

Steve stares you down, “I deserve to meet her.”

Your head snaps towards him, “You don’t deserve jack shit, Steve.”

Your vision becomes blurry with tears as you start hitting his chest aimlessly, “You left! You abandoned me! You deserve nothing!”

You feel strong arms pulling you back as you thrash around. Bucky’s soft voice rings in your ears,

“It’s okay, doll, it’s me. Calm down.”

Bucky’s hands cup your face, and he wipes your tears away with his thumbs as you calm down. When you stop crying, he pulls you into a hug and you feel his chest vibrate as he speaks lowly, “It’s time for you to go, Steve.”

You hear Steve’s equally deep voice from behind you, “I’m not going anywhere until I meet my child.”

Bucky chuckles humorlessly as you let go of Bucky and turn towards Steve, “She is not your child. She is Y/N and I’s little girl, and she will not be anywhere near you.”

As if on cue, Lizzie comes running out of the house.

“Mommy!”

You pick up your little girl and wrap your arms around her. She tries, but fails, to whisper in your ear, “Mommy, why is the man from yesterday here again?”

You chuckle at her lack of discretion. You stroke her back as you reply,

“He’s one of Mommy and Daddy’s old friend. But he was just about to leave.” Lizzie detaches her arms from around you before sliding down to the ground and walking to Steve. He kneels down to be eye-level with her and she holds her hand out to him.

“Hi. My name is Elizabeth, but everyone calls me Lizzie.” Steve shakes her little hand and responds, “Hi Lizzie, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Steve.”

Lizzie frowns at Steve before saying, “Are the bad man Steve that hurt my mommy?”

A look of shock draws itself on Steve’s face as he stares at Lizzie.

Lizzie turns towards you and runs back before saying, “I want him to go!”

Bucky laughs under his breath before saying, “Okay, Lizzie, come on. Daddy’s gonna make you some lunch.”

Lizzie walks over to Bucky taking his large metal hand in her smaller one before walking rapidly towards the house.

Steve stands up, putting his hands in his pockets.

“Why did she say that?”

You scoff as you cross your arms and look at him, “Because she caught me crying my eyes out one day and she asked what was wrong with me. So, Sarah told her the story about the bad man Steve that hurt me and made me sad sometimes.”

Steve detaches his eyes from yours, guilt written all over his face.

“I’m sorry”, he whispers.

“I didn’t know how bad I hurt you when I left and I shouldn’t have come back here like everything was going to be like it was when I left.”

Steve looks back at you, tears in his eyes. “I’ll leave and never come back. And congratulations on the engagement. I’m sure that Bucky and you are going to be great together.”

Steve starts to walk back towards the front yard as you stay standing in front of the bench. You hear the motorcycle start and before you can stop yourself, your legs are running towards him to stop him from leaving.

He turns off the motorcycle when he sees you in front of him.

You take a deep breath, clenching and unclenching your fists a couple of times before you say, “I forgive you. And I’m sorry I lied about Lizzie not being yours, I just… I don’t know.”

Steve nods slightly and starts his motorcycle again before riding off towards the road. You let you a breath and walk to the house.

When you see Bucky and Lizzie in the kitchen, playfully preparing some lunch, you smile bigger than you have in what felt like forever.

Your mind and your heart were finally at peace.

hi @saiyanprincessswanie i would love it if you could check this out for your reading list, hope you enjoy🤍

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