#like 200 expressions in a 5 minute interview | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

op-peccatori · 4 years

Text

Hopefully, Yours (part 2) | MLQC Victor

Fandom: Mr Love Queen’s Choice

Pairing: Victor/Fem!Reader

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 8326

Summary: It took some cake, a friend, and some impulsive behaviour, but they got there. (part 2 of Hopefully, Yours)

Warnings/Tags: making out, language, my cheeseball antics

a/n: I was afraid of opening this doc at one point because every time I did I added more words to it ;; Also accidentally deleted the first draft, so I hope I didn’t leave anything out for this one.

[video]

After Hours | Victor and Y/n

200, 280 views • Feb 8th, 2020

‎‎

JTV ✓

1.19M subscribers

‎‎

5100 comments

‎‎

somsom 5 minutes ago

They’re both so nice. Victor’s always made out to be this heartless CEO, so it’s nice to see this side of him :)

‎‎

tooktiktook 7 minutes ago

hmmmMMM

‎‎

cheribb 15 minutes ago

their eyes said more than enough <3 <3

‎‎‎

saltqueen 16 minutes ago

what i wouldn’t give to have someone look that soft over me

⌨⌨⌨

Victor eyed the cheerful grin splitting Jason’s face, just a little uneasy in his seat.

While having eager eyes on him was not an unfamiliar experience, he’d never been in a position where he was expected to talk about his feelings on camera. Not that he was about to confess in front of the entire crew of the show, but when it came to you the lines always got a little too blurry for his comfort.

He got a little too eager.

“Just be nice,” Jason had instructed gently, and Victor steeled himself.

They started, quite predictably, by asking him about his ideal type. Resisting the urge to scoff, he tried to stick to the script he’d worked on with Goldman, who had insisted on being present for today’s shoot. Not that Victor was complaining; it wasn’t exactly part of the job description, but Goldman had been enthusiastic, which Victor could appreciate and would certainly reward.

Goldman had also spent most of yesterday handling the public relations department in his absence, preparing them for his appearance on the show. A tentative plan would be sent to him by tomorrow morning. He had faith in them, believing that they would be able to make this look good for him.

“Someone who works hard,” he answered, knowing you would laugh at that. “Who can be themselves around me, someone I can be myself around. Someone...kind.”

The times you’ve spent in Souvenir flit through his mind, some quiet and some full of bright-eyed chatter.

“You’ve known Y/n for some time, right?” the interviewer asked. She looked nice, but he’d been on the block long enough to know that even the kindest faces can often hide the sharpest teeth.

“Yes.”

“What do you think of her?”

“She’s a very kind person,” he said easily. “One of the most hard-working and inspiring people I’ve ever met.”

You would surely gape like a fool after seeing this. It was a little embarrassing, but Victor was determined to leave your image shiny after this. He would not have any words of his twisted to give you a bad name. If it got even a fraction of his feelings across, well, that was a bonus he wouldn’t mind having. The intimate setting of the ferris wheel had seemed to help some, but his admittedly indirect confession didn’t reach you as he had hoped.

God, but his father would love this.

“Did you have fun on your date?”

“It was lovely.” They tacked on another question and he nodded. “I...yes, I’d love to do it again.”

It was a little curt, but he didn’t really get what Goldman had meant by ‘nod tenderly with a far-off look.’

What would you think of that?

The interviewer raised a brow, her smile widening. “Let’s get to it, then. How do you feel about her?”

For some bizarre reason, the first thing that had come to his mind at this question was his inexplicable need to check your social idea every day. And the way his heart beats just a little faster when you’ve posted a new picture. How, in moments of weakness, he’d given in and saved a few to his phone. Even a mental reminder of it made him a little hot under the collar.

There were many things he couldn’t even begin to try and explain when it came to you.

Really, the list is endless.

Victor’s current favourite was the video you’d uploaded of eating the tiramisu he’d cooked. He watches it at the end of a bad day and just like that, he feels a little better.

“I think anyone who ends up with her would be the luckiest person in the world,” he said honestly. “She’s beautiful in every single way.”

The last three words were supposed to have stayed in his head, but saying them felt natural. Goldman seemed to approve, shooting him a discreet thumbs up.

When you walk in, sleep-deprived and grumpy but trying to hide it, thinking he won’t catch on as if he isn’t running sharp eyes over every inch of your face. When the first sip of your coffee is too eager, leaving your tongue burnt and him with a pressing need to soothe it with his own. When you eat too much sugar and complain about a stomach-ache; he scolds you for it, but his arms are left straining with the need to wrap themselves around you.

He cherished these moments and wanted every single one all to himself.

She makes me greedy.

“Would you want to be that person?”

Victor laughed, light and incredulous.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

“I guess time will have to answer that question for us,” he said, the ghost of a smile on his lips, leaving it at just the right note to keep viewers hanging—right along with him.

lightscameranaps ✓ @jasonp

Hope y’all enjoyed the episode! #HopefullyYours

‎‎

bandanaman @headaccs

@jasonp sooo really sorry about this but we’re kinda dying over here

‎‎

raspberrydream @berryberry

@headaccs Victor’s acc is still private. Maybe there’s something there?

‎‎

srirachafire @hotsauce

@berryberry But Y/n’s isn’t private, and there’s nothing there. Give it up guys, they’re just friends.

‎‎

bandanaman @headaccs

@hotsauce bruh that look?? was not friendship

‎‎‎

raspberrydream @berryberry

@hotsauce those words?? were not friendship

‎‎

srirachafire @hotsauce

@headaccs @berryberry you two?? are hopeless romantics

‎‎

lightscameranaps ✓ @jasonp

@headaccs honestly? me too D:

‎‎

bandanaman @headaccs

@jasonp !!!!!! asdfgdvsd

Closing your Moments and the entire thread discussing the episode, you flop back down onto your mattress. Reaching for your newest plushy, you hug it tight, perhaps a tad too aggressively.

It’s odd. You struggle between the visceral sort of pleasure that comes from a job well done—because the response is terrific—and the trembling nerves that come from watching yourself on a date with Victor.

Watching the episode had been harder than you had expected; you hadn’t quite been expecting the way Victor was looking at you—the intense gaze was a little too convincing, and watching it from the audience’s perspective was flustering.

You spent most of it trying to suppress the inconvenient surges of hope, telling yourself it wasn’t real.

There really was nothing to know. The ferris wheel shot had ended there because you had nothing to say to Victor’s answer. You don’t know if he was referring to his past or his present, but the look in his eyes made it clear: his feelings were still there. Instead of pressing him, you chose to stay quiet, exhaustion clear in your face and sinking deep into your bones.

Victor had seemed to understand and maybe even appreciate it, probably not wanting to discuss it either, and only insisted on dropping you home. The ride to your place had been mostly silent, but you had tried to ask him his thoughts on the day and the shoot. He kept his answers concise, appearing a little distracted, which was so unlike him it made you wonder if he regretted opening up.

You’d spent the entire ride trying to quell the delicate little thing trembling in your chest.

The next video started while you were lost in your thoughts, and it happens to be your individual parts. Curious, you lean in, wincing slightly at the way you were fidgeting.

And then they switch to Victor. You both had to wear the outfits from the date for these, but you still weren't quite expecting the impact his voice alone would have on you.

And as always, those fierce eyes have you freezing in place.

“Let’s get to it, then. How do you feel about her?”

He looks unfazed by the question. Of course, they go over the questions with you beforehand, but you still remember how nervous you’d felt when asked how you felt about him; Victor’s eyes flick towards the camera, filled with intent, as if addressing you—and you close the laptop with a snap, your throat tight.

You don’t have to watch that right away.

You had been very careful about what to say, how to act, channeling your inner-Victor to adopt a marble-smooth expression. Say nice things about him? Easy, you didn’t even have to make anything up. Imply just enough to keep people guessing.

Keep your unwanted feelings to yourself.

Palm coming to rest over your heart, pressing down as if it would alleviate the ache there, you try to sort through your thoughts. You never really thought there was a chance, but to hear it confirmed was a blow you weren’t prepared for.

It’s ridiculous to feel so insecure, you think. You feel like you lost a competition you had never even had the chance to compete in. And over an unnamed, mysterious figure? So silly!

But another part of your mind says it’s okay to feel this way, that it’s only natural. You’ve had such strong feelings for Victor for so long. And all of these feelings, the good and the bad, are yours; the wounds of your heart, the light in your laughter. Fighting them would only make you suffer. The love and the hurt are part of you, both important in their own right.

Knowing all of that doesn’t make it easier, though.

After all, Victor had alluded to his feelings on camera, to your face. Knowing him, he would never do that unless he was sure about the person.

“This fucking sucks,” you admit out loud, and at the heels of your words come the tears. Because, to make it even worse, people really seem to think it’s you.

You can’t blame them, because even you had been taken in by his soft looks. Anyone watching would believe he’s smitten with you. Good for the show, terrible for you.

You’re not strong enough to reply to them, to tell them you aren’t that fortunate, and have been hoping Victor, or someone from his team, would put a stop to it.

But there hasn’t been any word from them and you curse out loud at the fact that he expects you to do something about it. As if there’s any more emphasis needed, your phone vibrates. Unlocking it with a miserable sigh, you scroll down quickly.

‎‎

Minor [19:40]: am I watching this right? Boss, are you dating the CEO? PLS SAY NO

Chik [20:21]: You bitch. When were you going to tell me you snagged THAT? So I was right back then, ha! Anyway, you two are adorbs. The puppy eyes are disgusting. I’m proud of you.

Chik [20:22]: also...deets. Now. I’ll even throw in a please!!!

Lucien [20:40]: Well, now. I seem to have missed out on quite the opportunity.

Kiro [20:45]: I wish you’d invited me. But I guess it wouldn’t have mattered. I hope he makes you happy, Miss Chips! He better, or else ;P

‎‎

Frowning at the texts you scroll back up, hoping, hoping, hoping, and at the sight of the name that always sits at the tip of your tongue, you curl up tighter.

‎‎

Victor [21: 05]: Are you okay?

Y/N [21:20]: I’m fine. Moments seems to be blowing up, haha. Did you watch the episode?

Victor [21: 20]: Yes.

Victor [21: 21]: Did you?

‎

You pause at that, looking guiltily at your laptop. You had, sort of. Fighting off your own thoughts had taken up most of your attention. Resolving to watch it again—a clear display of previously dormant masochistic tendencies, roused by Victor— and actually pay attention this time, you turn back to the screen.

‎

Y/N [21:22]: Yeah, but not the individual parts. It was nice, they made it seem so real! But we’re going to have to say something to let them know there’s nothing like that.

‎

You wait anxiously for a reply, a part of you clearly suffering from delusion hoping he’d oppose that. When there’s no text from him for a few minutes, you plug your phone in to charge and get out of bed, heading for a quick shower before you get something to eat.

Heartbreak hasn't been enough to curb your appetite, and you feel more than ready to let dessert have the chance to make you feel better.

Who needs Victor when you have cake, right?

Just as you’re halfway through cutting a slice of the cake Jason—well, his team—had sent as thanks, trying to keep your thoughts away from the bottle of wine you‘ve got tucked away, your doorbell rings, breaking the melancholic silence of your apartment. A part of you wants to roll your eyes at your dramatics, while the other feels you have the right to wallow for as long as you need to.

The irrational side of you stirs once more, conjuring thoughts of Victor rushing over, and you peep through the hole with a wildly thumping heart.

Lucien’s serene smile chases those thoughts away, and you open the door with a sheepish grin.

He looks a little tired, his dark bangs ruffled; unlike his usual sharp appearance, he looks impossibly soft in his barn red sweater and comfortable looking track pants. He’s also got a folder tucked under one arm.

“Hi!”

“Sorry to drop by so late,” he greets you, his warm eyes bringing you a little comfort instantly. “But you mentioned you’d be working on Miracle Finder tomorrow and I wanted you to have the chance to go over my remarks before that.”

“Lucien! Thank you,” you insist, waving away his apology. “Would you like to come in? I’ve got cake.”

He searches your face for a moment, and his eyes narrow the slightest bit. You feel a little self-conscious in your over-sized sweatshirt and shorts, but it’s not like he hasn’t seen you in various states of disarray before.

“Can’t really say no to that. Let me get my laptop,” he finally agrees. You wait at the door as he gets it, before leading him in. But you notice his curious, inquisitive looks, so subtle and so Lucien, as he toes off his shoes.

“Everything okay?” You reach for another plate, cutting a second slice as Lucien takes a seat at the table.

“Yes, of course. It’s just,” he hesitates, and there’s that odd scrutiny again. “I wasn’t expecting you to be alone.”

“On a Sunday evening?” The first bite of the cake tastes like sweet comfort over the taste of despondency, and you send a silent thanks to Jason. “I spent the day napping.”

“Well, after the show I just watched,” he says, quite slyly in your opinion. “I wasn’t even sure if you’d be home.”

“I didn’t know you were interested in dating shows.” You’re aware your tone is more than a little petulant, but Lucien only laughs around a mouthful of the cake.

“I am if you’re in one,” he retorts. “This is quite nice, by the way.”

“The director, Jason sent it. And, honestly, it wasn’t planned. We were supposed to have Kai and Hollow on, but they ended up clashing horribly. Jason asked me and Victor was around, so…” you trail off, uncomfortable.

“Is that why you texted me that day?” He seems to have remembered your message, and you wince slightly. You had texted him later with an apology, but hadn’t really expected him to cotton on. He doesn't look mad, just expectant.

“Well, yes, but Jason wanted, he wanted Victor.” Stumbling over your words, heat suffuses your skin as you flounder for a moment.

Lucien watches you with the eyes of a fox and the understanding of a good friend. “Just Jason?”

“Huh?”

“Was it just Jason who wanted Victor?” he asks, tilting his head as your mouth purses.

No, no, of course it wasn’t. You stare down at your half-eaten cake, the other half of it beginning to churn in your stomach. His small, soft smiles. His scent. His rants on street food and the way he dragged you away from food that would ‘absolutely make you ill, you absolute dummy’ as Jason resigned himself to having to cut all of that out. It all comes back in a rush, your head left feeling heavy.

And then it feels the weight of a hand, as Lucien reaches over to pat it gently. “Never mind. Why don’t you get your organizer and we can go over tomorrow’s episode?”

Relieved, grateful and slightly emotional over his silent acceptance, you rush to your bedroom to find your notebook and laptop, barely catching the light of your phone screen before it went black. Unplugging and checking it as you exited the room with your materials in hand, your train of thought comes to a screeching halt.

‎‎

Victor [21:59]: Do you really believe that?

Victor (2 missed calls)

Victor [22:15]: Y/n.

Victor [22:16]: ...Did you fall asleep?

Victor [22:18]: Dummy. Goodnight.

‎‎

Unwilling to delve into what his first text means, you shift your thick planner in your arms and type a quick reply.

‎‎

Y/N [22:19]: Hi! Sorry. I went to get something to eat and then Lucien dropped by. We’re going to get to work haha ^^

Victor [22:19]: …

‎‎

You wait for a whole minute before Lucien calls for you, and let your hand fall, phone locked, with a sigh.

Well, at least he’ll be happy to hear you’re working hard.

Sinking into familiar, engaging discussions with Lucien is easy. Even with the thoughts of Victor looming at the back of your mind, you straighten out a plan for the shoot. Lucien listens to your input carefully, adding his own notes as you squint at yours. His voice, familiar and soothing, lulls you, distracting you from yourself for a short while.

Before you know it, it’s eleven and you’ve got a fantastic plan in hand.

“I’m sorry I kept you so late,” you say for the second time in a minute, and he gives you an exasperated look. “And thank you.”

“I’ve told you, there’s no need for all that between us,” Lucien repeats, crossing one long leg over the other as he adopts a thoughtful look. “However, perhaps you could satisfy my curiosity regarding one thing.”

“What is it?”

You were prepared for a philosophical question. What he comes up with is, in your opinion, way more difficult to answer.

“Why aren’t you with Victor?” he asks seriously. You blink, uncomprehending.

“Like, right now?”

“Right now, or in general. I didn’t think he would just...let you be,” Lucien mutters the last part under his breath, but you still catch it. He continues to say something about possessive bastards, but you’re not touching that.

“I think you’ve misunderstood,” you say, slowly, with a nervous laugh, shoulders hunching a little. “All of that was just for the camera. Victor and I aren’t like that.”

“But you have feelings for him,” Lucien points out, cutting straight to the heart of the matter and yours. Really, this is almost cruel. Lucien turns to face you fully as you sigh and sink back into the couch.

“I do.” It’s the first time you’ve admitted it out loud. Sure, some of the people in your life have had an idea, but you’ve never said it. Lucien seems like a good person to start with. “But he doesn’t feel the same way, so.”

And you’ve never said that out loud either. It hurts, as you put it out into the universe. As if shying away from it before would have increased your chances.

Lucien looks at you oddly. “Did he say that? Because the way he looks at you says otherwise. It’s quite embarrassing.”

You feel heat creeping up the back of your neck.

“I’ve never told him how I feel,” you mumble, pressing the side of your cheek into the soft fabric, hoping it would swallow you up.

“Then how do you know how he feels?” Lucien continues to probe, and you exhale forcefully because it’s so clear to you; why isn’t it ever as clear to everyone else?

And Lucien is supposed to be your smart friend!

‘Well, there’s also someone else in his life but I can’t exactly say that.’

“Because it’s Victor,” you declare with an emphatic sweep of your hands, hoping it would somehow get your point across, that it would explain how unattainable he is. Just as you do, two things happen successively.

One: Lucien looks at you as if he wants to boink you on the head or laugh really loudly. He does neither, but his mouth twitches violently.

And two: there’s a series of loud, heavy knocks on your door, before the culprit seems to remember you have a doorbell and rings that instead. It only rings once, but you can sense that the person is still there.

Exchanging alarmed looks with Lucien, you rise to your feet and shuffle towards the door.

“Let me,” Lucien murmurs, stopping you before you can reach the entrance, and steps forward to look through the peephole. His only reaction is a quick, sharp exhale before he steps back to unlock the door.

Without telling you who was just knocking at your door like a maniac.

“Wait, who i-” the words fall away with your panicked thoughts, as Lucien opens the door to reveal your uninvited visitor.

It really is Victor this time, with his chest heaving as if he’d run up the stairs. Victor, with his inky hair pushed back carelessly, in dark grey sweats and a light grey t-shirt and indoor slippers.

Victor, with a furious look in his eyes as he pushes past Lucien, who looks a little too entertained in the face of such ire.

“Sorry to intrude on your cosy evening,” he says, after a short pause, through clenched teeth. You stare at him in disbelief, unable to form actual words at the moment. It feels as if a concentrated storm itself has swept into your living room, ready to swallow you up.

Of course, a part of you would be more than okay with that. Even with that knife-sharp glint in his eyes, you can’t help but want to throw yourself at it, let it graze the softest parts of you, in an emotional variation of bloodletting.

Sometimes you surprise yourself with the things you think.

Maybe you should’ve changed into nicer pyjamas after all, damn it.

“Victor? What-is everything okay?” You look him over carefully, seeing no visible signs of injury. The stony look on his face, however, keeps you from coming too close. What could you possibly have done now?

Swiftly, you run through a list of work-related tasks. Nope. Nothing. You’ve been sure to give it your all this week just so Victor wouldn’t feel the need to call you.

Even now, though, something under your skin starts buzzing, as it always does when his entire attention is on you.

“Yes. Why wouldn’t everything be okay?” he says mutinously, crossing his arms over his chest. Okay, you’re sensing more than a little hostility here.

And, because life is unfair, bitchy is also a good look on Victor.

“Well,” you draw out, looking past him at Lucien, who shrugs lightly. Victor frowns at the exchange. He levels a downright lethal glare at Lucien, who tilts his head in clear interest. Kinda hot, but you should probably keep that to yourself lest you push Victor to the point of spitting fire. “It’s...late...and you’re here…?”

That has his mouth doing that little spasm it does when he’s pissed. “And I notice I’m not the only one. What, is it just me who’s barred from coming to your place this late?”

“Well, n-no,” you stammer, looking once more at Lucien who seems content to watch and be unhelpful. “But Lucien was just here to talk about tomorrow’s episode.”

Why are you here?

The question seems to hang in the air, unsaid yet clear.

Victor says nothing, standing tall in your living room like an indignant matron. You feel helpless, confused, elated and increasingly offended because of the implication in his words that only catches up to you now.

You pick the path of offense.

“But what, exactly, did you think Lucien was doing here?” you ask, your tone turning decidedly cooler. He returns your glare. Behind him, you see Lucien trying to hide a smile. “You seem to be under the impression that I make it a habit of entertaining people in my evenings?”

Victor blinks at that, arms coming loose, and you hold up a hand.

“And even if I did want to have friends over at night,” you say loudly, through gritted teeth. “What business is it of yours?”

“It’s inappropriate,” he insists.

“No, what’s inappropriate is you coming into my house and telling me who I should, or should not, be spending time with, regardless of the time.” Much to your frustration, you find yourself blinking back tears as your voice cracks towards the end.

Victor deflates at that, the ice in his expression melting in the face of your furious tears; Lucien, concern clear on his face, takes a step towards you. Your eyes squeeze shut, as if that would hide you from them; anger and embarrassment war within you at not only crying in front of Victor, but to have a quiet Lucien witnessing this ridiculous drama.

Where did your peaceful day go?

You hear footsteps, hesitant and barely audible, come closer, feel the heat from a body as it nears yours.

“I’m sorry. I’ll leave.” It’s Victor.

Your eyes snap open to the sight of his back, your feet carrying you forward without the aid of your thoughts, a hand curling loosely into his t-shirt.

Leave? Just like that?

He stops in his tracks, looking back down at you in surprise. You’re not sure what he sees as you keep your eyes fixed on his shoulder, but it makes him sigh softly.

A thumb wipes under your eyes, gentle, and strong arms wrap around you carefully, pulling you into an—unreasonably broad, you think—chest; his comforting scent envelopes you, pulling you back from the edge.

It’s frustrating. You want to yell at him for barging in like a lunatic. But you don’t want him to leave. You want to sink into his steady embrace and allow the solace it brings.

With your face pressed to his t-shirt, you miss the way he looks back at Lucien, who nods and turns to leave, but not before holding Victor’s gaze for a moment longer—you don’t see the warmth drain from his face, the vicious warning warning clear in his eyes.

Victor pulls you closer, nodding once.

If Lucien’s answering smile is a touch more resigned than amused, neither of them can really acknowledge it.

You try to pull back when you hear the door close gently, but Victor cards a hand through your hair and you slump back into his embrace.

“I’m sorry,” he repeats, stroking your hair, with a gentle hesitance uncharacteristic for the decisive man. “That was...extremely inappropriate of me. I should not have done that. I can leave. I should.”

He should. But neither of you move. His heart beats a little faster, the sound clearer the longer your ear remains pressed into his chest.

With cotton in your mouth, your mind totally mush with the knowledge that Victor’s hugging you, and with the little voice yelling that he does not get to hold you after driving you to tears—it takes you a moment to form a response.

But you can’t resist. “So what you’re saying is you made an impulsive decision.”

The soft motions of his hand pause before he huffs into your hair. There’s no other response, and it makes you smile a little.

“Why did you?” you finally ask. Victor quite visibly lost his cool. While he did seem to have something against Lucien, this was a bit much. You hadn’t been aware that the hostility ran this deep.

He tucks your head under his chin, the arm around your waist tightening, and as the anger subsides, your face begins to heat up as you realize how intimate this is. But Victor seems content to stay like this, and your heart hammers when you feel something brush the crown of your head.

“Dummy,” he mutters, and yes, his words are slightly muffled by your hair, and you feel the urge to stick your head in the refrigerator. “You had that guy over this late at night. Do you really need to ask?”

“It’s just Lucien,” you respond, and this time he lets you pull your head away to look at you with abject disbelief.

“Just? There’s no just with that guy.” He seems serious, so you swallow the laughter bubbling up.

“Lucien is a dear friend,” you assure him. “You were really that worried about it?”

“Worried,” Victor repeats, staring at you. Your confusion is clear in your face, as the feeling that you’re missing something creeps in. “Worried. Yes. I was worried.”

You nod encouragingly, and take a quick step back when he laughs. It isn’t one of his airy laughs, that escapes him when he finds something funny. It’s low, almost strangled—and then he steps forward, expression melting into sheer intent.

When he speaks, his voice is a full octave lower and it scrambles your brains with shameful ease.

“Since he was the one you considered over me for our date that day. Yes, I suppose I was worried,” he muses, matching every unsteady step you take backwards with one towards you. You refrain from pointing out that it was for a show, and all too soon, the back of the sofa hits your hips and Victor looms over you.

You tuck the part about him knowing you wanted to ask Lucien first away for later. Victor, his soothing scent, the heat from his breath, his tempestuous gaze—your senses flood with him.

“Y-yeah. But you didn’t need to be, he always helps us out,” you point out confusedly, and he gives you a familiar, unimpressed look that brings a small, and odd, measure of relief.

“What kind of a person would I be,” he says, and your stomach swoops as he leans over you, hands resting on the top of the sofa as you lean back. “If I let dangerous men like him think they have a chance with you?”

“Dangerous? He’s…” The rest of his words catch up and you can’t think, tongue struggling to form coherent speech. “Not...dangerous?”

“Too dangerous,” he murmurs, lips brushing over your temple. Something in the back of your throat trembles. “Even if I don’t have the right, I…”

He doesn’t continue.

Holding your breath, you count to five before releasing it, pulse beating an anticipatory beat in your veins. “Why should anyone think they don’t have a chance with me?”

You know he hasn’t, but with how everything in you stills after asking that question, you wonder if he stopped time.

You’re not sure if it’s the right question to have asked, or the worst.

But it gives him pause, and when the tip of your tongue slips out to wet your lips, his eyes slide down to your mouth. A large hand slides up your spine to rest at the back of your head, your skin erupting with goosebumps at the touch.

Your lips part on the softest sound and it makes something rumble in his chest, quiet but clear with how close he is.

It gives you what you’ve been dreaming of—Victor’s lips falling over yours, soft, with a rushed breath and fervent eyes, something desperate at the edge of it. Everything goes quiet, with only your blood pounding in your ears. It feels as if every inch of you is awake in a tingly sort of way, your thoughts deserting you at the way he looks at you, ready to devour.

There’s hunger in his eyes, and you feel faint when it hits you.

It’s also his answer, you realize, mouth opening to say something, anything, and he pulls you back, kissing you fiercely. Something in you caves, spilling into your blood, setting it alight with a burst of sparking desire.

Victor kisses with his entire body, like he does everything else: controlling every inch of it, sweeping your mind clean, licking into your mouth with the determination that drives his every action, to conquer.

But you’ve been determined to match him since the day you first met him, all too eager to push back and clash. You don’t mind the clack of teeth, the lack of rhythm, and Victor only presses in harder as your arms slide over his shoulders, fingers weaving into his hair. Your tongue is a sly thing that licks along his, your mouth a clever warm weapon that sucks at it, and he unravels.

Hands that were so careful lose their caution as they dig into the sides of your hips, slinking down and hooking around your thighs as he lifts you up, your legs wrapping around his waist.

“You’re not stopping me,” he rasps against your lips, almost questioning, pupils blown wide. He looks so good you might just lose your mind, and this is after a kiss.

Taking a page out of his book, you kiss him again.

He carries you around the sofa—with a strength you’ll be sure to admire deeply once you’ve regained the ability to form thoughts—even as he sucks bruises into the delicate skin of your neck, sitting down with you sinking into his lap.

You’re shivering, you realize, at this sudden fulfilment of a desperate, impossible wish. Your knees press into the sides of his thighs as Victor kisses the corners of your mouth, the curve of your upper lip, the plush, swollen jut of your lower lip—and you feel deliriously drunk.

He watches you carefully.

“Oh,” you say, half-slurring, kissed stupid. “That’s why.”

“Hm,” he agrees, nuzzling the side of your face. His eyes are bright, his arms a grounding touch around your back. “No one should think they get to have this.”

“No one but you?” It’s meant to be clever, sharper, but it comes out shy instead. He nips at the shell of your ear, and you can’t bring yourself to be mad about it.

“If you allow it,” he confirms. He presses his lips to the soft skin behind your ear.

Something swells within you, sweet, sudden and threatening to dissolve you into tears. It breaks open, everything you’ve worked so hard to suppress spilling out like hoarded treasure out of a box now too small to hold it.

“I like you.” It comes out in a rush, and you slap your hands over your face. This time, his low chuckle rings clear in your ears. But when your breath hitches on a sob, his grip on you tightens, lips finding your forehead. “I really like you. So much. I have for a while. At the fair, all of it, I wasn’t...wasn’t acting.”

“What, and you thought I was?” He looks a little offended when you take a peek at his face. But the sight of his ruffled hair and kissed-puffy lips sends a hot, thrilled jolt through you, and you have to restrain yourself from pouncing. “I have many skills. Acting, admittedly, is not one of them.”

“I thought maybe it was a hidden passion or something,” you mutter, trying to repress a wet laugh at the withering look he gives you, gentle hands wiping at your eyes. “What, you were great!”

“Nope. That was all real,” he declares, pulling you in to rest against him, your head on his shoulder. You feel a little awkward, but that’s mostly outweighed by how much you want to stay here. “...well, maybe I was a little…”

“Nicer than usual?” you offer, and he huffs into your hair. “Cheesy, like you binge-read several romance novels the night before?”

“Cheesy?” He protests, and you laugh with warmth building and rushing through you. “I thought you liked all that.”

“I do.” This time, the kiss he presses into the crown of your head is firmer.

“Then I’ll do it.” You look up at him, a little enchanted, a little bewildered, but the former wins out as the corners of his mouth curl up. “Every silly thing you want to do. Oh, and I really like you too.” It’s almost a scoff, but the tremor in his voice and the flush that spreads across his skin speaks his truth.

“Really?” you ask, your grin a little mad and ridiculously beatific. It feels unreal, the joy and relief spreading through you; he pecks the tip of your nose.

“Have I ever given you reason to doubt me?” Victor asks, and the solemn sincerity in his voice prompts you to deliver a loud, smacking kiss to his cheek, just because you can. To your unending joy, the lobes of his ears are almost impossibly red.

“Never,” you assure him, peppering more kisses over his skin, fascinating by the sight of him pinkening. A thought strikes you, dampening your rising spirits. “I thought...thought there was someone else.”

He makes a soft, surprised noise in his throat, disbelief winning out over the tenderness for a moment. “Who?”

“I don’t know!” You press your face into the side of his neck, inhaling his comforting scent, hoping it would help with the remnants of hurt. “Some mystery goddess.”

He’s quiet as you nuzzle his rapidly warming skin, feeling the first hints of sheer mortification settle in at the way your voice just cracked. He whispers something.

“Sorry?”

Victor clears his throat. “Just you.” He buries his nose in your hair before you have the chance to lean back like you want to. “It’s only ever been you.”

Not expecting the sincere confession, it feels as if the breath was punched out of you. “Why didn’t you ever say anything?”

He toys with a strand of your hair, curling it absently around a finger. “I didn’t want to overstep. And to make you feel like you had to reciprocate.”

You stay silent, sensing that he has more to say, even though you want nothing more than to wrap yourself around him and never let go.

“I’ll admit that I feared you would feel pressured to be with me. And that would...I would rather see you happy with someone else, than see you miserable with me.”

“I could never be miserable with you,” you protest at once, feeling almost offended by the mere suggestion.

“I’m not...I know I can be difficult.” The words fall out in a rushed exhale, as if he wants to get them out before they can be swallowed; you feel weak with the force of your emotions. “But I can try for you. I did that day. I wanted you to relax, to have fun, like you do with your friends. I didn’t want you to be so...cautious.”

It’s true, you realize guiltily, that there are times where you can’t completely relax in Victor’s company. Those are the days where your feelings sit a little heavier in your stomach, when his words strike a little sharper. The thought of disappointing him, of doing something not to his taste, of judgment, held you back.

But the day of the fair had been different. He met you halfway, maybe even more than that, and never said a word of complaint. You’d assumed that had been for the camera, though.

“Please,” he says with a roll of his eyes, and you realize you’d said that out loud. “No, that was…” He lowers his gaze, long lashes fanning over the tops of his cheekbones. “That was to show you that you can have fun with me too. I...like you. The way you are. Every bit. The determined, unyielding parts.”

You stare at him.

“The hurting, unsure parts,” he says, a little quieter. “The silly, ridiculously cute parts—don’t look at me like that.”

“Like what,” you ask, your overworked mind trying to process his words, knowing your smile is probably embarrassingly dopey.

He scowls at you. “Just be yourself with me. Dummy is fine.”

“Victor,” you exclaim all of a sudden, startling him. “How am I supposed to stay standing in the face of you saying things like that?”

He rolls his eyes again. “First of all, you’re sitting right now, and I don’t plan to let you move for a while.” Predictably, you feel a little lightheaded at that. “And as for the future...then don’t try to stand, dummy. You can just rest here.” He pulls your head to rest on his shoulder, patting it firmly.

“I’m going to die,” you say with absolute certainty into his shoulder. “I can’t survive this.”

“You have to,” he mutters dryly, tucking you more firmly against him. “Haven’t you seen the discussions? Our ‘love story’ can’t end in your death, too many would be left devastated.”

“Including you?” The look you direct at him is positively vulpine, and he snorts, pushing your head back down. Bully.

The titillated fluttering in your stomach makes you smile.

“...I can’t become a widower before we even get married,” he says solemnly, and you can nearly feel the blood drain from your face as you rear back.

The corners of his mouth twitch with something like mischief, and the smack you deliver to his bicep is perfectly justified.

The undoubtedly chiselled muscle you feel very briefly will also require further rumination once you’re alone.

He’s cracking marriage jokes, no doubt referring to the few comments gushing about a secret wedding. An hour ago, you had been under the impression that he was madly in love with some mystery figure.

Like a bird just freed, your heart flutters at the thought of him having feelings for you.

“Say it again.”

To his credit, he doesn’t do you the disservice of pretending he doesn’t know what you’re asking for. He clears his throat, eyes flicking to the side before finding their way back to yours.

“I like you,” he says, a little lower, a lot deeper. “Dummy.”

You wish you could see what your face was doing, because it makes his eyes go really, really soft. Now that you aren’t weighed down by the frantic need to hide your feelings from one of the most astute people you’ve ever met, you feel like you could float away the way you’ve seen Gavin do, just from how free and happy you feel.

“Just for the record,” you say quietly. “I like you the way you are too.”

“Hm?”

“Even when you’re being a jerk.” He tweaks your ear lightly, rolling his eyes when you giggle. Your heart beats a harsh beat as you try to come up with the right words. “But you’re also the best man I know. When you have it together, and when you don’t—I’ll be there for you. Always.” The way he’s always been there for you.

He kisses the tip of your nose, his pretty eyes a little shinier than before.

“We should aim for a real date first.” He sounds decisive, and a little hoarse.

“...I have a list of places I thought would be good for our first date,” you admit, eyes still locked with his despite your shy admission. He looks pleased, always happy when you take the initiative, and you watch his mouth do that tender thing for a second before leaning in for a swift kiss, catching his lower lip between your teeth as you pull away.

“Good.” His head falls back onto the sofa as your lips trail down his neck curiously, mouthing at the slope of his adam’s apple. Just because you can. “Send it to me.”

“Good,” you murmur, breath hitching in your throat as his hands curl over your waist, skimming the hem of your sweatshirt. “We’re doing this, then.”

“Most definitely.” With how throaty his voice has gotten as you reach his clavicle, a gentle explorer, you’re not sure words will be your allies for much longer.

“Will you be my boyfriend then, Mr. CEO?” you ask playfully, tasting the words in your mouth. Victor makes a soft, content sound in his throat.

“I’m all yours,” he affirms, relishing the words in his mouth, raising his head to look at you through hooded eyes. You both know it, just a little, but saying the words brings a giddy, vulnerable sort of feeling with them. “And you…”

With no need for hope, just certainty, you rise up to kiss him softly.

“I’m yours.”

BTS:

Goldman stares at Jason in horrified disbelief, shocked by the words that had just left the director’s mouth. He glances at his boss, whose only reaction had been to cock a brow.

“Would you be open to replacing Kai?”

“I’m...not really one for such shows,” Victor says, quite delicately in Goldman’s opinion, knowing the man usually has no qualms about being savagely blunt.

“I’m aware. I just thought it would be something different, something that would let people see a different side of you,” Jason explains, still completely at ease.

Victor’s expression makes it quite clear he doesn’t care about people seeing other sides of him.

“Who’s the other participant? Did Hollow come back?” Goldman asks, curious despite himself. In his very personal opinion, which he will definitely be keeping to himself, it might be nice for Victor’s image if people saw he isn’t always heartless.

“Oh, no. She didn’t,” Jason says pleasantly. But the look in his eyes is almost hawklike as he keeps them locked on Victor. “I asked Y/n to do it instead. She agreed.”

Now, to the untrained eye, Victor gives no outward reaction to that statement.

But Goldman sees the way his brow twitches, the way his lips purse the slightest bit. He wonders if Jason, as a director with many years of experience under his belt, caught it too.

“She agreed?” Victor asks, sounding as if he doesn’t quite believe it.

“Yes,” Jason answers, suddenly distracted as he glances at his wristwatch. He sighs, a touch too dramatic to be convincing, but Goldman doesn’t think Victor cares about that. “But I understand. We wouldn’t want you to do something you’re not interested in. I have to go check on her, we’ll keep you updated.”

Something is happening here, Goldman realizes. Jason isn’t rushing out, but seems to be waiting for something.

Victor, staring at the surface of the coffee table, is struggling.

Goldman struggles too. He struggles not to roll his eyes in abject exasperation, to pray for divine patience. Why is he like this? Of course, to step into such an obvious trap surely goes against all the instincts he’s honed over the years, but none of that matters when it comes to the delicate matters of the heart!

Instead, he catches Jason’s eyes, pushing his glasses up his nose, eyes glinting.

“But who else would you ask to step in on such short notice?” Goldman asks, pointedly.

And finally, Goldman holds his breath as the ghost of a smirk passes over Jason’s mouth.

This is it.

“Oh, it shouldn’t be a problem. Y/n said she could call Professor Lucien, having already guessed Victor wouldn’t be, um, up for it. She really knows you well, huh?” Jason informs them cheerfully, and even Goldman isn’t expecting that. He thought Jason would go for the ‘who will help poor y/n’ route.

It’s obvious manipulation, and they all know it. Knowing Victor, he will stubbornly refuse to give in and suffer for it. At least, the way he’s glaring at Jason seems to indicate that.

Goldman rushes through several justifications in his head, forming a rapidly coherent argument as to why he should do it, carefully keeping ‘if you don’t want to see her with someone else, suck it up’ and ‘please, please, watching you sulk is really sad I can’t do it’ off the list.

Surely, Victor wouldn’t let the sexy professor sweep you off your feet? He’s heard the man talk, that kind of smooth talk should not be allowed and holy hell, Jason has played this really well.

“They do get along well, so it should work,” Jason muses, slathering a little more icing on his three-tier cake of clear-cut manipulation, drama, and subterfuge.

“I’ll do it.” It’s said through a tightened jaw, but it rings clear in the silence of the room. Goldman abandons his mental speech, head whipping around to stare at Victor.

“Oh?” Jason sounds genuinely surprised, as if he hadn’t been aiming for this from the start.

“Yes,” comes the answer, leaving no room for argument.

“Are you sure?” Jason asks, oddly somber, finally abandoning the pretense. So he is in possession of some morals, who would have thought?

“Give me the briefing,” Victor says, shoulders set in a firm, determined line Goldman is all too familiar with.

Jason relaxes into his seat, relief clear in his face.

And as Victor turns to him, giving him specific instructions about his outfit, cologne and flowers, determined to do this right with that familiar, besotted spark in his eye, Goldman feels warm pride trickle in.

‘We’re gonna get you the girl, boss.’

Aaaaaaand...CUT.

I know the last behind the scenes thing wasn’t really needed but I had to

Thank you for reading, I hope you liked it!

#mlqc #mlqc victor #mlqc fanfic #mr love li zeyan #mlqc li zeyan #mr love queen's choice #mr love: queen's choice #my writing #tag yourselves im lucien

286 notes · View notes

hakutaichou · 3 years

Text

[CN] Main Story: Chapter 37 (Gavin Route)

⚠️ SPOILER AHEAD ⚠️

🚨 Warning: This post contains REALLY BIG spoiler from main story which some of them have not been released in JP, TW, Global, nor ASEAN servers. 🚨

A/N: “All Love Interest ANGST Route” takes place between Chapter 37-4 and Chapter 37-5.

Before read, please prepare a tissue and your HEART!!!

- Part 1 -

Northern Suburbs, temporary base for STF.

Days of natural disasters have raised the disaster prevention alert of Loveland City by several levels.

In order to deal with the doomsday, all countries in the world have established doomsday rescue operations headquarters, and jointly formulated a number of rescue policies.

The last issue of "Miracle Finder" is to record the scenes of these soldiers fighting against disasters in the doomsday.

The car stopped at the base station gate, and I got out of the car with camera crew.

In the empty wilderness, several special officers in white uniforms patrolled the surrounding area.

According to the forecast, a tornado is about to hit Loveland City, and the STF troops will be here to stop the crisis.

Minor: Brother, where did your commander go?

STF Officer : Commander is very busy, and has no time to see you.

Minor: Hey, we are...

MC: Hello, we have made an appointment for an interview, can you let us in?

The officer looked suspiciously at the press card hanging around my neck.

STF Officer: You are waiting here, I will confirm it.

Eli: She doesn't need to make an appointment.

STF Officer: Captain Eli!

Eli walked leisurely with his hands in his pockets, and nodded at me.

Eli: MC, long time no see.

He looked at the serious-faced officer again.

Eli: Do you know who she is?

The officer looked at me and then at Eli, with a suddenly realized expression.

STF Officer: Eh, she is Commander's...

I slapped awkwardly, blocked the officer's unfinished words first.

MC: If it is not convenient, let's go back first.

Eli: There is nothing inconvenient. By the way, do you need me to help you call Gavin?

MC: No need! I don't want to interfere with your actions.

Eli: Then don't bother, you are free.

Eli: However, according to forecasts, there will be less than five minutes before the tornado enters the area of the city.

Eli: You'd better shoot near here, don't get close to the edges of those wind barriers.

MC: I understand!

Eli's remarks made everyone start scrambling to set up shooting equipment.

The wind became louder and louder, and a large funnel-shaped cloud soon appeared on the horizon, so gloomy that almost covered the entire sky.

Minor: I heard that the central wind speed of a tornado can reach 200 meters per second, which means that it will blow us away with people and machines in five minutes...

Willow: Close your crow's mouth.

Minor: Hey, I haven't finished speaking yet. With Bro Gavin, there is nothing to worry about.

The film crew quickly set up the machine, ready to start filming the entire process of STF team repelling the tornado.

After a while, the circular wind barrier erected all around shook violently, the surrounding trees were rustling.

A thick black shadow appeared at the end of the horizon, hurriedly approaching here.

The tornado is coming.

Photographer: Producer, the wind and sand are too big, it is difficult for us to get close to shooting!

MC: Let me find a way.

I thought for a while and took out the portable DV machine from my bag.

Just now Eli has divided the safety range for us. As long as we do not exceed that range for shooting, there should be no problem.

The violent wind that came in on the verge of blowing in the gap made the gap bigger, many of the team members who were in the front were injured.

STF Officer: The wind is too strong, we can't approach from the inner wall!

Anxious shouts from the STF members came from afar, and everyone present couldn't help but grab their hearts.

A calm and cold voice came from the communicator.

Gavin: I will go.

It's Gavin.

I resisted the urge to scream, my eyes and the camera stared at the distant sky unblinkingly.

The shifted wind barrier was quickly pushed back to its original position by another strong wind, and returned to the array.

The wind weakened, the tornado gradually deviated from its path.

Everyone waited nervously, and a few minutes later, the shadow of the tornado disappeared without a trace on the horizon.

Photographer: Amazing!!

MC: Gavin, you are so handsome!

Several injured officers were quickly taken away by the resident doctor, and I nervously searched for Gavin on the court.

From a distance, I saw a familiar figure approaching me.

My eyes lit up, and I ran towards him without hesitation.

MC: Are you okay? Isn't it hurt?

A look of helplessness passed across Gavin's face, he stretched out his hand, help me straighten my hair.

MC: What you looked like just now...

"Gavin, you are so handsome!"

At some point, my hand accidentally pressed the play button of the video just recorded, and the sigh was recorded verbatim into the screen.

MC: …When editing, this sentence will be deleted.

A smile finally appeared on his stern face.

Gavin: Wait here, I’ll come to you later.

- Part 2 -

STF Officer A: When Commander was still tasked as B-7, we have heard his rumors.

STF Officer A: Whether it is natural or man-made disasters these days, we can survive it, thanks to his judgment and decision-making.

STF Officer B: Yes, everyone was injured in the last rescue. Thanks to Commander, the situation was stabilized and the casualties were avoided.

STF Officer B: …But after returning, he formulated more stringent training plan.

MC: I see...

MC: Is there any moment when Commander makes you feel particularly tender?

The young officer in front of me "umm" for seven full seconds, and finally shook his head.

STF Officer A: More like medical insurance, count it?

Gavin: You seem to be very free.

Gavin stood behind us at some point, his voice cold.

STF Officer A: Commander!

The two STF members who were still babbling a while ago immediately stood up, saluted to Gavin together.

MC: .....

I turned around with a guilty conscience and looked at Gavin in front of me. When I looked down, I noticed that his wrist under his cuff was wrapped in gauze several times.

He just left temporarily, so he should simply treat the wound.

The crowd scattered like birds and beasts, soon only I and Gavin were left.

Gavin: What happened just now?

MC: Well... I just want to interview STF's recent work routine.

Gavin: I'm not asking about that. Your actions just now were dangerous.

MC: I said hello to Eli, and confirmed that I was in the safe zone!

I vowed to raise my hand, swear in my ear. Gavin's serious expression finally eased a little.

Looking at Gavin, I remembered all the rumors I had heard from the officers, their respectful and scared look, I couldn't help but laugh.

Gavin: What are you laughing at?

MC: Nothing, I was thinking about the last issue of "Miracle Finder", would you like to give a personal interview as Commander...

MC: But I'm just kidding, if it bother you, forget it.

Gavin: It's not bother.

His gaze moved down, and he scanned the line of drafted titles on the open page of the notebook in my hand.

Gavin: "The Commander's outside and inside". Do you want to know the outside, or the inside?

I smiled awkwardly, and the corners of Gavin's lips raised slightly.

Minor: Bro Gavin! Are you OK!

A noisy voice came from behind, Gavin glanced back and frowned quickly.

I don't know when Minor ran over, but he was dragged out by Willow before he finished speaking.

After both of them left, the surrounding area became quiet again.

Gavin: It's too noisy here. Let's change place.

I nodded and walked out of the base with Gavin.

***

A whistling wind came from the sinkhole in the distance, and a shallow layer of rain accumulated on the ground, reflecting the clear night sky and a little bit of starlight.

I followed the arched ridge all the way forward and photographed the traces of the tornado, asking Gavin one after another.

MC: I listened to Eli...

MC: NW put all its forces into establishing an airtight underground base, and didn't join your joint rescue...

Gavin: They aren't upside down.

Gavin: As long as that day doesn't come, STF won't give up protecting everyone here.

His tone is very flat, but it makes people feel extremely reliable.

I thought about it, and re-adjusted the DV mode, aiming at Gavin.

MC: Next, I will start an official interview.

Gavin: …Why do you want to give me an interview.

MC: Because you are the Commander of STF, what you say is the most convincing.

This interview is a temporary motive. I was not prepared for the question, so I just asked what I thought.

MC: The first question: What is the most important thing for the commander at the moment?

Gavin: Protect everyone's safety, and prevent disasters from happening.

MC: The second question: The commander felt that in this situation, for every citizens, what is the most important thing?

Gavin: This is varies from person to another.

…This minimalist way of answering questions, it's really Gavin's style.

MC: The third question...

Suddenly, the flapping sound of bird wings interrupted my question, and large swarms of pigeons started to start from deep in the woods.

MC: That is...

Gavin raised his head, looking solemnly at the flock of white pigeons in the sky.

Gavin: The abnormal weather in the past few days has caused the magnetic field in the vicinity to be disordered, and the return route of the pigeons has also been affected.

In the deep night, the pigeon flock wandered anxiously over the woods, flapping its wings constantly, as if calling for the return of their companions.

However, after the tornado struck, many birds were injured or died, and white feathers were scattered everywhere on the ground.

Several faint calls came from the bushes not far away.

Gavin and I approached and found two injured pigeons

One of them was badly injured, and dying; the other was still struggling.

MC: Will they die?

Gavin didn't speak, and rescued the two pigeons from the strange orange bushes, with a little blood stained on their messy wings.

It seemed to be frightened, its body trembling, and the warning sound of "cooing" as soon as we approached.

MC: Great, it seems okay!

Gavin: Be careful, don't get hurt by them.

Gavin: This is a wild pigeon that has not been domesticated, and is very wary of humans.

Gavin avoided the beak pecked by the pigeon, picked it up and checked it.

Gavin: No injuries.

The pigeon struggled to escape from his palm.

MC: Do they continue to fly forward?

Gavin made a soft "Mm" sound.

Gavin untwisted the withered grass entangled in its ankles, and another small gust of wind rolled up in his palms, drying its wet wings.

Gavin: If the wings are not wet, the flight home can be easier.

Its eyes rolled steadily, as if understanding the intention of Gavin, obediently gave up the struggle.

Perhaps after waiting too long, the group hovering in the sky gradually moved away, flying behind the invisible gray sky.

MC: Can this pigeon find its friends?

Gavin: Difficult.

MC: I see...

Gavin seemed to notice my loss, and changed his words.

Gavin: But it is not impossible.

Gavin: The migration of pigeon, is actually a story about commitment.

MC: Committed?

Gavin: Fulfill their promise to go back.

Gavin: No matter how far you fly, you will definitely arrive where you want to fly as scheduled.

The pigeon in his palm seemed to sense Gavin's words and tried to wave its wings again.

The small gust of wind gradually increased, escorting this child to the sky.

Soon, it struggling to flap its wings forward, disappearing into the night sky and the end of the stars.

MC: In fact, whether it is them or the wind, they all know their direction.

MC: Even if it takes a long time to walk, even if it will go away, it will not stop.

MC: Is that right?

Gavin didn't speak, but gently held my hand.

At this time, a few STF members came towards us, saluted to Gavin, and solemnly reported the situation of the other bases.

Gavin's face was always calm, as if no matter what kind of danger he encountered, he would not have the slightest panic.

MC: Is there another task?

I couldn't help but whisper to Eli, who was beside me, and he nodded.

Eli: I heard that there was a violent conflict in the city, and the situation is not very optimistic. They have to come to support tonight.

MC: I see... thank you very much.

Eli: Don't worry, Gavin will stay in Loveland City to lead. He is the backbone of all of us.

I'm a little embarrassed to be guessed by Eli.

Eli: But we have to rush to deal with a flood tonight. The disaster is dangerous, so you can't follow.

MC: I know, you guys must come back safely.

The bonfire ignited at the distant base dispelled the darkness, and the constantly rising tongue of fire brightened the night sky red, and occasionally there were a few crisp clashes of wine glasses and laughter.

This temporary celebration and happiness seem extremely precious on such a night.

I involuntarily rubbed my palms tightly, and some hope that the "moment" in that prophecy would come soon.

No matter where I go or what I experience, it would be great if I could reverse the ending.

After the officers reported, Eli stepped forward and said something to Gavin, patted him on the shoulder, and suddenly looked at me again.

Eli: I'll leave first, and meet again later, the young couple get along well.

Eli left after speaking, waved goodbye to me before leaving.

There was a brief silence all around, only cheers from afar broke the silence between us.

MC: Are you leaving now?

Gavin: Mm, we will leave in two hours.

I stepped forward, took his hand gently, and sat down on a rock.

The wind in the wilderness is blowing on the long stretch of grass in the distance, and there is a green smell in the darkness that fluctuates with the night.

MC: Then you need a good rest now.

MC: I wonder if Mr. Commander, who has been busy all day, is willing to agree to my request.

Gavin: Can I take a rest?

I was stunned by him, after a few seconds, I didn't expect Gavin was directly rest on my knee.

Gavin: Thank you for coming.

MC: ...You're welcome.

I opened my mouth again, trying to remedy my stupid answer, but Gavin had already closed my eyes.

For a long time, long and even breathing sounded from my knees.

This land is shrouded in night and cold, but my heart is very bright and warm at this moment.

I gently stroked his finally showing tired eyebrows, my heart soft.

MC: Thank you for the hard work, Gavin.

I hope you can also have a good dream.

- Part 3 -

In the vast expanse of the universe, a swarm of comets quickly fell to the blue planet.

Cities, forests, mountains, rivers and oceans were all engulfed by heat waves and tongues of fire, and vanished in the blink of an eye.

It seems that I am the only one left in the whole world, and the stars gradually shrink, hitting my heart like a burning bullet hitting the bullseye---

I woke up from the nightmare and took a deep breath.

Gavin: Woke up?

MC: I'm sorry... I fell asleep too.

I raised my head, met Gavin's worried eyes.

Gavin: Had a nightmare?

MC: Not a manifest dream, but a sweet dream.

MC: I dreamt that we became super cosmic warriors, saving the world from the brink of destruction.

I cheered up, and made a joke pretending to be relaxed.

Gavin: It seems that dream should be kept longer, it is best not to wake up.

He sighed, and gathered the jacket over me again.

There are footsteps approaching behind him.

When Gavin got up, the officer came over and whispered something to Gavin.

I was stunned, and quickly reacted: He is going to the next temporary base to command the mission.

MC: Are you leaving soon?

Gavin: There are still ten minutes left.

MC: Then I have one last question to interview you.

I turned around, fixedly looked at Gavin.

MC: Before the end, what is your wish?

Gavin: ...My wish?

MC: This is the question I want to ask you, so you can answer me alone.

MC: I have interviewed many people these days, and heard many people’s wishes, but I haven't had a chance to ask your wishes.

MC: I want to know what Gavin's wish is.

Gavin's expression was a little surprised, and he didn't speak for a long time.

Perhaps, this question is too vain and slow, he never put his wishes on unrealistic things.

???: Look, there are meteors!

The cheers of the crowd came from far behind, and Gavin and I raised our heads together.

The sky was passing by a meteor, dragging a bright trail, from loneliness to grandeur.

Under this bright and grand light, everything becomes small and quiet.

MC: Beautiful...

The falling trajectory of the meteor is long and narrow in the night sky.

The ubiquitous light illuminates the mountains and valleys in the distance, the river at the end of the horizon, and the city.

It also illuminates every face looking up on the earth.

Gavin suddenly grabbed my hand, his voice was very soft.

Gavin: When I was seventeen, I did have a wish.

Suddenly a large swarm of snow-white flew across the sky.

The flying dove in the dark night fluttered its wings and dropped a large piece of white feathers, drowning his voice.

I looked up in a different place, saw his star-lit eyes, and wanted to ask him what it was.

He looked at me with a deep retention and sadness. I always felt, that there were many emotions that I didn't understand.

In a second of distraction, I almost blurted out if he knew that I was going to leave.

But I didn't have the courage to speak up to verify this conjecture.

I grabbed his hand and tried to make a smile.

MC: I used to see meteors and could only think of wishing. I didn't expect that one day the meteors would actually destroy the world.

Gavin: Are you scared?

I shook my head.

MC: In fact, as long as I'm by your side, I'm not afraid at all.

Gavin lowered his head and put the kiss on our folded hands.

Gavin: I promise you.

Gavin: I won't leave you, until the last moment.

I heard his heartbeat on his chest, closed my eyes, and silently made a vow to the meteor.

May the world never end.

May he always be by my side.

- Part 4 -

The news broadcast the arrival time of the X1917 comet cluster, as expected, without any change.

As a commander, Gavin became more and more busy, and the occasional time together became exceptionally short.

Today, the STF is holding a major meeting.

Those present were all commanders from various countries' combat headquarters participating in this joint doomsday rescue.

After the meeting, I put down the interview draft and couldn't help but look at the meeting room.

Gavin came out last, and he was talking to a foreign man with a high nose and deep eyes.

The man seemed to notice me waiting on the side, he turned to me, his face stretched.

Foreign Commander: Eh, you are the producer. I have watched your show, Miracle Finder, which is great.

He gave me a thumbs up.

MC: ...Thank you!

I can't fully understand their small talk. I can only vaguely hear the commander's admiration and gratitude to Gavin.

After the conversation, he saluted to Gavin, and then left with his men.

I couldn't wait to walk to Gavin, wanting to open my mouth, but hesitated again.

The news specially told him today, perhaps compared with the important news he comes into contact with every day, is nothing at all.

Gavin: What's wrong?

MC: Gavin, I have good news for you.

MC: After the previous program was broadcast, some citizens contacted us and wanted to send you a loving lunch, medical supplies, and...

I counted the enthusiastic letters I received these days with my fingers. He listened carefully, his lips curled up unconsciously.

Gavin: STF doesn't need these for the time being, but it can be sent to disaster areas with more dangerous conditions.

Gavin: You can figure it out. I'll give you some addresses later.

MC: Okay!

Gavin's gaze flickered slightly, as if he had to say something, the communicator on his waist ticked.

Gavin: ...Wait for me.

MC: It's okay, go ahead.

I cheered up and bid farewell to Gavin, but the loss of separation was still unstoppable in my heart.

I let out a sigh of relief and began to think about how to arrange these supplies.

This time we are, fighting side by side with all mankind.

***

The last day of the countdown.

The days of waiting regretfully finally arrived, but it seemed to be no different from usual.

MC: How is the situation today?

STF Officer A: There were no casualties, and damaged communications and traffic are slowly recovering.

STF Officer B: That's right, Commander was not injured, so Sister-In-Law, don't worry.

MC: ...Okay.

While chatting, I looked around for Gavin's figures.

Soon, a figure dangled from behind the door of the headquarters.

Gavin, who had changed his uniform, walked towards me, the cuffs of the gray jacket were slightly rolled up, revealing a strong wrist.

At the moment when my eyes were facing each other, Gavin had already walked to me, and I was stunned for a second.

I raised my head and looked at him, as if I had guessed something in my heart.

Gavin: Come?

MC: You, there are no tasks today?

Gavin: I took half a day off.

MC: Eh....?

Gavin: I'll accompany you out for a walk.

Behind him, the whistle and the confession sounded one after another, Gavin faintly swept back, and the group of people suddenly made noise again.

MC: Is it really okay? I think it’s good to stay here...

Gavin took my hand and walked out. I turned around a little hesitantly, afraid that he would waste too much time.

Unexpectedly, Eli also waved at me and made a "rest assured" mouth shape.

Gavin: Leave them alone.

MC: I don't know why, but now I always have a feeling of occupying major public resources.

The corners of Gavin's mouth twitched slightly, and he looked at me helplessly, sighed.

Gavin: Can't the Commander go on a date after get off work.

He stood still in front of me, a little serious in his amber eyes.

Gavin: What stands in front of you now, it's Gavin that belongs to you only.

***

There was no one on the street, and the few shadows of trees stretched to the end of the empty road.

We unknowingly walked to the vicinity of Loveland High School and ate the last bowl of noodles at the still-open Lynn's Kitchen.

A live interview of STF to fight off the tornado is being broadcast on TV, and the boss exclaims while watching.

Boss: Did you really repel the tornado?

Gavin: Some news likes to exaggerate, you don't have to believe it.

MC: Gavin, this was taken by me.

Gavin: …Hmm, it was repelled.

Boss: Add more beef for you. Do you want other side dishes?

MC: I want it!

Gavin: Are you sure you can eat it?

MC: I'm able to eat it!

Gavin put down his chopsticks, looked at the side dishes on the table and the pile of beef in the bowl, he expressed doubts to me with his eyes.

MC: Is this a new flavor of noodles? It seems that I have never eaten it before.

Boss: Did little girl eat it? I updated the recipe of the soup. How does it taste?

MC: Super invincible and delicious!

Boss: That's good.

Boss: There are too many things that have been missed in a lifetime, and it's not worth beating.

Boss: However, it is still a pity that more people haven't tasted this bowl of noodles.

Boss: Thank you for finishing it.

***

MC: I'm so full...!

Gavin: You ate all the side dishes the boss gave.

MC: Because I don’t want to be a starving ghost...

Gavin: Nonsense.

Gavin gently knocked on my forehead, his eyes turned to the school gate across the road, his expression suddenly softened.

Gavin: You saved a cat here.

MC: You have beaten a few people here.

Gavin laughed.

Unexpectedly the school door closed tightly. Gavin noticed the loss on my face and patted my shoulder lightly.

Gavin: Do you want to go elsewhere?

MC: What a pity... I still want to go back and have a look.

MC: Wait, I get it!

***

Gavin: Are you sure you want to do this?

MC: No one, is afraid of anything!

With Gavin's help, I finally climbed the outer wall of the back door of the school.

MC: I wanted to do this a long time ago.

I clapped my hands, turned my head, Gavin was still standing under the wall, looking at me with a little speechless and a little funny.

MC: It doesn't matter, there is no one in the security room and no one in the school building. Come up soon.

Gavin touched his lips, with an expression of defeat by me.

He easily climbed up the wall and sat down beside me.

Gavin: Ready?

He seemed to see my hesitation and looked at me holding back a smile.

Gavin: I will count down for you?

This is the end of the matter, regret is useless. I took a deep breath and slowly released the fingers that were holding behind me.

Gavin: Three, two---

Before "One" hasn’t shouted out, I subconsciously let go of my hand because of tension, and my falling body was quickly surrounded by a gust of wind.

The violent heartbeat hit the tympanic membrane, and we landed safely on the ground.

MC: I didn't seem to have eaten so much just now.

Gavin: Can't walk anymore?

MC: ...I'm afraid you won't be able to hold it.

Gavin: Hold tight.

As if to verify this sentence, his hand pierced my knees and hugged me to the direction of the school building.

MC: But like this...!!

Gavin gently raised the corners of her lips.

Gavin: No one, is afraid of anything.

***

We came to Gavin's classroom.

The classroom door was not locked. I turned on the light, saw that the writing on the blackboard had not been cleaned.

MC: Gavin, which table is yours?

Gavin was a little surprised. He looked around and pointed to the back of the classroom by the window.

Gavin: There.

MC: Is this one?

I walked to the back of the classroom and stared curiously at the graffiti on this table.

MC: "Early" was carved upside down on the table,... I can't tell that you are quite easy to learn.

Gavin: …It’s the back one.

I followed Gavin's gaze and looked back. A desk was in the corner next to the wall.

MC: But after so many years, It must have changed many seats, and the table may not be this one.

I took the opportunity to sit down in the seat where Gavin had been, and looked around.

MC: Um... the vision from the blackboard is not very good.

MC: But the ventilation is good, it should be comfortable to sleep here in the afternoon.

I don't know if it was because of listening to my serious comments, there was a sporadic smile on his lips.

Gavin: Why are you talking about that suddenly?

MC: I told you before, we organized ordinary citizens and Evolver to build a wishing wall.

MC: I thought I would see a lot of fanciful and weird wishes, but after seeing it, I realized that this was not the case.

MC: "I want to eat hot pot for the last time", "Reunion with my family", "I want to reconcile with the lover who broke up"...

MC: That’s why I realized, everyone’s strongest wish is, actually a regret that has not been realized.

MC: That's why...

I want to make up for these regrets.

We left the classroom, and walked down the stairs. The sound of different footsteps echoed in the dim staircase.

Gavin: Are you scared?

MC: Hm?

Gavin: I remember many horror legends circulated in schools.

He slowed down as he spoke, always keeping a step away from me in front of him.

I hesitated for a moment and wanted to tell Gavin that I was not afraid.

In other words, I'm more afraid that the road under my feet will be finished soon than I'm afraid of these stories.

I hope the stairs below my feet can be longer, preferably without end.

MC: .....Gavin.

I stood on the edge of the steps, turned my head, and could not help calling his name.

A repressed impulse, drove me to do something.

He stood on a step lower than me, stopped, and looked at me with some doubts.

The few rays of light that leaked out of the window fell between us, cutting light and dark apart.

This light is like a crease, and I stand in front of him now, as if witnessing the folding of the years that have separated us.

Gavin: I know what you want to say.

His voice was lightened for an instant, with a sure smile.

The next second, he bent down, clasped my chin, and kissed me.

- Part 5-

The dim lights on both sides of the road passed through the dense leaves, scattered on the ground.

The library didn’t open, Gavin and I were strolling around the empty campus.

There seemed to be a warm touch remaining on the lips, I looked away pretending to be calm, always embarrassed to meet Gavin's gaze.

The bell rang in the distance, and the ginkgo leaves rustled down.

For a time, none of us spoke.

The meteors in the sky are getting denser, and my heart is beating faster and faster.

An uneasy premonition told me, that moment was approaching.

MC: Although shooting stars can be seen every day, it seems that many wishes are too late.

I pretended to smile with ease, breaking the deadlock between us. Gavin seemed to perceive something, and his amber-colored eyes looked at me.

Gavin: MC, You haven't finished what you just said.

Gavin: You keep asking about my wishes, what about yours?

MC: My wish...

My voice couldn't help but stop.

The ginkgo leaves on the branches are crumbling, and some are knocking on the windows of the school building behind them.

These leaves rustle on the branches in summer, and they creak when they fall in autumn. Every leaf makes a nice sound, but I have never noticed it.

I suddenly knew what my wish was.

I want to walk slowly at the school gate before the class bell rings.

I want to look up in the library and take a good look at the teenager sleeping opposite me.

I want to catch the wind at the age of seventeen, and say goodbye to him before the ginkgo leaves fall.

I looked up at Gavin, suddenly I wanted to cry.

MC: What if my wish will never come true?

Gavin was taken aback, for a long time, he rubbed the top of my head.

Gavin: Then go ahead.

Gavin: The wish that may not be reached now, but if you come back one day, it's already by your side.

I took a deep breath and grabbed his hand.

MC: Gavin, I am going to do something very important now.

MC: I kept busying myself a few days ago, thinking that if I didn't think about it, I wouldn't be sad until that time.

MC: But now I want to thank you, you gave me the courage to face it.

I felt like crying, but still managed to squeeze a smile.

MC: I'm leaving.

Gavin was silent, he gently stretched out his hand and stroked my face.

Gavin: I seem to be very bad at saying goodbye, and I have never been able to say goodbye to you every time.

Gavin didn't ask why or where I was going. He seemed to have known about this a long time ago.

Just hugged my arm hard and hot, as if to hold something at the last moment.

MC: This time it's my turn to say goodbye to you.

MC: We have experienced so many things, so this time is nothing.

I feel my body is getting lighter and lighter, and my limbs are gradually losing consciousness.

Perhaps that moment has come, my mind is getting harder and harder to concentrate, only vaguely seeing deeper and deeper sadness in my eyes.

MC: You told me...

MC: Regardless of the wind, the pigeon has its own direction, and I think I should do the same.

MC: But I am a person who has no sense of direction. I may go the wrong way and it will take a long time to get back to you...

Tears still fell unconvincingly, I sucked my mouth and wanted to speak again, but Gavin interrupted my words firmly.

Gavin: It doesn't matter if you go the wrong way.

Gavin: It doesn't matter if you come late.

Gavin: When I was seventeen, you let me know the direction of the wind.

Gavin: So it’s the same for you, just walk in your direction, no matter where you lead...

Gavin: My wish, is to meet you.

The white light was like a trickle, slowly seeping from the girl's body, illuminating the whole night.

MC: When the time comes, please correct my direction.

Feathers fluttered slowly from the girl's body.

The sky seemed to show a gleam of light, and the wine fell on the white feathers piled up under the girl's feet.

Gavin stood there quietly for a long time, his eyes always on the place where the girl disappeared.

He looked at the feathers scattered on the ground and the ginkgo that was blown away by the wind, his lips moved slightly and his hands slowly dropped.

The clear and distant "ding dong" echoed in the empty campus---

The bell rang after class.

#mlqc #mlqc cn #mlqc gavin #mlqc spoilers #mlqc chapters #ANGST #ANDSNSJKSJKSDJKNSK #GAVIN!!!!!#PG....WHY...WHY U LIKE TO STABBING OUR FRAGILE HEART?!!!!!

51 notes · View notes

missmorosis · 3 years

Text

Bad Days

AHH hi everyone! So this was kinda all over the place- also @urmomoness i couldn’t put him in jail. I just couldn’t. Not even for his ponytail crime.

Enjoy another Zuko x Reader! Sorry for doing this to Zuko ahaha- I’m writing like two more Sokka x readers soon to MAYYYBEEE make up for it!! 💖

AHH also! I just reached 40 followers & this is my 200th post :) I love all of you guys, thank you so so so much!! 💖🧡🥺💛💚🥰💗😭✨💜

Pairing: Zuko x Reader

Word Count: 1.4k :)

Warnings: None!

Summary: Zuko was having a really bad day until Y/N came along to cheer him up!

Zuko was having a bad day. Scratch that, his day was worse than bad.

To start off his day, he clicked his phone on to check the time. The time “7:49 AM” flashed up at him. He had 41 minutes to get to work, which was enough time since he just had to get in the car by 8:00. It was a thirty-minute drive, and his shift started at 8:30. He got ready, throwing on some clean clothes, brushing his teeth, and combing his hair. He hopped into the car, sticking his hand into his pocket, searching for his keys.

Shoot. He forgot his keys. He ran back into the house, almost tripping over himself, frantically searching for his car keys. He looked under his mail, around the counter, and in every drawer. Where were they…?

On the edge of his vision, he spotted something bright yellow, hidden under some papers. He shuffled them around and sighed. Thank goodness for Y/N. She had attached a neon yellow cat keychain onto his keys. Now slightly smiling at the memory, he ran back to his car, starting his engine. He pulled out of the driveway but frowned.

Why was the engine making that sound? The car sputtered to a stop. Zuko cursed, jumping out of the car to try and see what was wrong. Smoke was blowing out of the front, and Zuko knew that he couldn’t take the car to work anymore. The only choice he had was to go on foot or catch a bus. The coffee shop was 12 miles away, so he decided to go with riding the bus. He Googled the nearest bus stop and went from there. The closest bus stop was 5 minutes away, and the bus was 3 minutes from reaching that stop!

He ran as fast as he could in order to make it in time, rushing past trees and almost tripping over himself a couple of times. Breathing heavily, he plopped onto the bus stop bench as soon as he arrived. The bench was cold, but he didn’t mind. He was just relieved that he made it in time-

What was that…? He squinted at something in the distance and cursed. The bus already left, and it was getting farther every second. Zuko pulled his hair in frustration. WHY. DID. EVERYTHING. SUCK.

Sighing, he started jogging on the sidewalk, heading toward the coffee shop.

“Zuko?” A white car pulled up next to him after a good amount of time jogging. The window rolled down, revealing a smiling Y/N behind the wheel.

“Y/N! Oh thank goodness, can you please drive me to work? I woke up on time, but I couldn’t find my keys and my car broke down, so I had to take the bus, but the bus left witho-” Y/N stopped Zuko from rambling and unlocked the car door.

“Get in, loser,” she said, laughing. Zuko let out a sigh of relief as he got in next to her, closing the car door behind him.

“Thank you so much, you’re a lifesaver.” He meant it. Zuko didn’t know what he would do if she wasn’t here right now.

“I know. You owe me some boba later, though.” Zuko rolled his eyes.

“Fine. Please take me to work, I’m going to be late.” Y/N started the engine and drove on course to the coffee shop. As soon as they arrived, Y/N blew Zuko a kiss goodbye as he ran into the shop. The bell jingled as he opened the door, rushing in as fast as he could. He glanced at the clock on the wall and cursed under his breath. He was an hour late.

“Zuko. Why were you late? We couldn’t open on time, since you’re our only worker today. I know we said it was going to be a slow day, but that doesn’t mean you can just show up whenever you want to.” His boss looked stern. Zuko looked at the floor, nervous for what was about to come.

“I’m sorry, my car broke down.”

“You missed one hour of your shift.”

“I know, I’m sorry.”

“Zuko. There are a lot of others who want this job. You aren’t exactly the best at making coffee either.” Zuko bit his lip. He knew what was coming.

“I- I know.”

“I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to give your job to someone else. I’ll send your last paycheck to you on Monday.” His heart sank. He was officially fired from his job for being late. He knew that the manager was really picky about their workers, but he didn’t know that being late was enough to get fired.

“I... understand.” He opened the front door of the cafe, unable to look anyone in the eye as he walked out. The bell jingled again behind him when he closed the door, leaving the coffee shop behind. He walked away, biting his lip to stop himself from crying. He was just fired. He had no job. He let that sink it. He was just fired. He had no job.

He looked around to see that Y/N’s car was still in the parking lot, and she was just getting ready to pull out. Zuko ran up (he was getting tired of running) and knocked on her car window. She looked up, giving him a perplexed look, but perhaps looking at the state Zuko was in, her face softened. She reached out to open the car door for him, and he fell in.

They drove for a bit in silence, and Zuko thought about what just happened. What was he going to do…? He had no job, he needed a new source of income. He sighed, causing Y/N to glance at him. She kept driving until they pulled up at a boba shop, and now it was Zuko’s turn to look confused.

“Y/N, what are we doing here?” he asked. Y/N smiled at him.

“Well, I know you already owe me boba, but I decided to treat you since you look like you need it.” Y/N parked her car and got out. Zuko opened and closed the car door, making sure that Y/N locked the car, just in case, before he went on. Y/N grabbed his hand and pulled him with her into the boba shop.

He had never been to this place before, and as he stood in line with Y/N by his side, he saw that the shop was called “The Jasmine Dragon.” Hm, interesting name… Zuko thought the name had a nice ring to it.

When it was his turn to order, he had no idea what to get, but luckily, Y/N had his back. “We’ll take two White Lotus teas, please! One with boba, and one without.” Y/N turned to Zuko and whispered, “I promise you’ll like it! It’s totally your taste. Also, I know you hate boba, so yeah.” She remembered... Zuko’s heart felt warm. Y/N remembered the littlest details about him, and he was lucky to have her.

Together, they sat down at a table for two, waiting for their order. When one of the employees called their order number, Y/N gestured for him to stay seated as she went to get their drinks.

She was taking a lot of time to just pick up drinks… After another minute or so, she came back with two teas in her hands. They were aesthetically pleasing; some foamed milk floating to the top of the translucent drink, a bit of brown sugar falling down from the sides. Zuko almost wanted to “instagram” it, even though he wasn’t even that type of person.

“Come on, try a sip.” Y/N pushed one closer to Zuko. He pulled it to his lips, trying a taste. Oh. Oh wow. It was sweet, but not too sweet. It was light and cold, refreshing his taste buds. The flavor was a perfect balance-

“This… this is the best thing I’ve ever tasted.” His eyes widened. Was it possible for anything to taste this heavenly?

“I know, right?! It’s SO good! People say it’s the best in the entire city of Ba Sing Se and I agree.” She stuck the straw into her mouth, drinking the tea as if the straw was permanently stuck to her lips.

Together, they walked out of The Jasmine Dragon, drinks still in their hands.

“Oh!” Y/N turned around to face him. “There’s more!” Her eyes twinkled. More..? “I scored an interview on Tuesday for you! I saw that they were hiring, and I knew something happened to your job earlier.” That’s what she was doing…

“Y/N…” His voice trailed off. “Thank you.” He smiled at her, unable to express his gratitude.

“You still owe me boba!” She laughed, getting into the car once more.

Zuko was having a bad day, but when he ran into Y/N, his day got a lot better.

A/N: hopefully this wasn’t too bad! firing zuko was honestly hard but ofc he has a y/n to cheer him up! LOVE YALL!! thank you for reading 🥺💖

again, thank you for 40 followers & 200 posts :)

Writing Masterlist

Taglist! @urmomoness

#zuko x reader #zuko #atla zuko #atla #atla imagine #atla x you #atla x y/n #atla x reader #zuko x y/n #zuko x you #zuko x yn #zuko imagine #zuko one shot #atla oneshot

95 notes · View notes

chris-evans-indian-fanfic · 4 years

Text

Finger Painting

One shot

This is for one of my most favourite writer's challenge! My one-shot entry for @jtargaryen18 writing challenge for her and Chris Evans' birthday month 😄

Description - It's been a month since the reader (Y/N) and Chris Evans have started dating. As the reader is plump around the stomach and the hips, she feels awkward having sex with Chris and so, has been putting it off. But what happens when Chris walks in on her "finger painting"?

Warning - Female masturbation, mentions of porn

Only 18+ proceed!

I don’t consent to have any of my work published or featured on any third party app, website or translated. If you are seeing this fanfiction anywhere but tumblr, it has been reposted without my permission. In that case, please do share the link and let me know.

Moodboard is by the wonderful @donutloverxo ! Show her some love people 🥰

1 month, 4 days, 2 hours and 26 minutes ago, your dreams had come true. You had started dating Chris Evans! The two of you had met at an axe-throwing club, where you worked. Chris had failed to hit the axe on the wooden board, multiple times. After his first few futile attempts, his group of friends had started teasing him relentlessly, which had further made him anxious.

You had seen him fidgeting with his hands, his breaths shallow as he kept running his hands through his hair. You recognised the signs of anxiety when you saw them, being a victim of anxiety bouts yourself. That's enough, you had decided and taken it upon yourself to share some tips. Chris had followed your instructions and hit his mark, successfully silencing his friends.

After then, he had visited the club almost every week for 5 months. He often offered to buy you a cup of coffee "in exchange for sharing your wise axe-throwing wisdom" he had put it. Putting your anxiety at bay, you had finally given in.

You smiled remembering the coffee-date. It was a simple under $20 date but it had been full of priceless, magical moments. The warm coffee in your hands, soft and crunchy chocolate chip cookies, slow walk under the gorgeous yellow and orange autumn trees, and a lifetime worth of conversations to keep you both company.

After a few more of such simple dates, Chris had officially asked you to be his girlfriend. Still high from the magical date, you had agreed without a second thought.

What you didn't realise was that while dating Chris was a dream come true, it was also as if one of your worst nightmares had come alive.

You found yourself constantly wondering how can someone like him date someone like you?! While you were sure Chris was sculpted by Michelangelo himself, on the other hand, you knew that you were the inspiration for the Michelin tire mascot. And so, even after dating him for 1 month, 4 days, 2 hours and 45 minutes, you still couldn't muster the strength to get physical with him.

While Chris hadn't made any moves to get intimate with you, you knew time would come wherein you would have to either talk to him about it, or get naked in front of him. You didn't like either of those prospects.

Sighing, you laid down on your bed, feeling down after a long day at work. You needed to make yourself feel good. You needed a release.

As you prepared for your bath, you heard your mobile ring. "Hey baby," Chris' voice sounded cheerful on the other end of the call, "wanna watch a movie tonight?"

"Hey Chris, I am too tired. I think I will just go to bed."

"Awww. Are you going to sleep already? Did you eat?" he inquired.

"I was actually about to take a bath, then eat," you replied.

"You sound so stressed baby. Why don't you do some finger painting? I am sure that will make you feel better," Chris suggested.

You have no idea, you thought. "Yeah that's a good suggestion. I will do that."

"You should. I bet they are masterpieces," he said, subtly expressing his desire to view her finger paintings, again.

"Hehe yeah," you laughed awkwardly, "I got to go now. Will take to you tomorrow, 'kay?" you said, eager to cut the call.

"Mmm okay. Take care of yourself baby," said Chris.

Chris found it weird that you had never shown him any of your paintings. Plus, you also avoided the question or were quick to change the topic. With curiosity getting better of him, he decided to head for your place, picking up wine, flowers and chocolates along the way.

After the long bath, you laid on the bed. Legs parted, your left hand immediately went to your bare sex, foregoing all the formality with your breasts. Your right hand browsed through Chris' video interviews on your mobile phone. While porn had worked well for you earlier, it just wasn't good enough anymore. You didn't find those naked, muscular men attractive now.

Selecting your favourite video interview of Chris, you played it on your speaker. His deep and strong voice blared on the loudest volume, while his bearded face, and a tight tshirt hugging his muscles filled your smartphone screen. You were already getting wet, your fingers easily diving through your folds. Time to do some finger painting.

When Chris reached your apartment, he heard a muffled male voice through the door. He tried the broken doorbell and when you didn't answer his knocks, he used the spare key hidden under the welcome mat to enter.

At first, he was surprised to hear a male voice talking on the speaker. He thought maybe you were listening to a podcast. But there was something familiar about the voice...

After a moment, realisation struck! You were watching his interview! Aaawww which meant you were missing him. Good thing he came down to pamper you.

Wishing to surprise you, he sneaked around the living room and entered the kitchen, only to find it empty. Then he heard a small moan from your bedroom. He carefully entered through the ajar door and found one of the most sexiest sights in front of him.

You were sprawled on the bed, your back arched just the tiniest bit as you rapidly thrusted 2 fingers inside of you, with your other hand fondling your bundle of nerves. He raised his eyebrows and smirked, finally understanding the meaning behind finger painting.

He slowly started rubbing his growing erection as you neared your release. You ended your ministrations with an exclamation, your body hitting the mattress as relaxation flooded through you. A peaceful smile crept up on your face, as you felt your release seeping between your thighs.

You screamed with shock as 200 pounds of drop-dead-gorgeous landed on top of you. 2 twinkling eyes, filled with lust and a cocky smirk flashed above you. "Honey, if this is what you call finger painting, then I would love to dip my brush in your paints," Chris said right before he captured your lips with his.

That was it. All it took was a hungry, sexual and passionate kiss to drive away all of your doubts, your anxiety.

You almost laughed at the speed with which Chris disposed off his clothes, his hard and unyielding body merging together with your soft, plump frame, eliminating all the distance between you two.

#30DaysOfChris2020 #chris evans #chris evans fanfic #chris evans fanfiction #chrisevans #chris evans x poc!reader #chris evans x plus size reader #chris evans x reader #Chris Evans x overweight reader #chris evans x you #chris evans x y/n #smut #chris evans smut #30 days of Chris 2020 #chris evans imagines #chris evans interview #chris evans imagine

393 notes · View notes

newstfionline · 3 years

Text

Saturday, July 31, 2021

Biden to allow eviction moratorium to expire Saturday (AP) The Biden administration announced Thursday it will allow a nationwide ban on evictions to expire Saturday, arguing that its hands are tied after the Supreme Court signaled the moratorium would only be extended until the end of the month. The White House said President Joe Biden would have liked to extend the federal eviction moratorium due to spread of the highly contagious delta variant of the coronavirus. Instead, Biden called on “Congress to extend the eviction moratorium to protect such vulnerable renters and their families without delay.” By the end of March, 6.4 million American households were behind on their rent, according to the Department of Housing and Urban Development. As of July 5, roughly 3.6 million people in the U.S. said they faced eviction in the next two months, according to the U.S. Census Bureau’s Household Pulse Survey.

Evacuation flight brings 200 Afghans to US (AP) The first flight evacuating Afghans who worked alongside Americans in Afghanistan brought more than 200 people, including scores of children and babies in arms, to resettlement in the United States on Friday, and President Joe Biden welcomed them home. The evacuation flights, bringing out former interpreters and others who fear retaliation from Afghanistan’s Taliban for having worked with American service members and civilians, highlight American uncertainty about how Afghanistan’s government and military will fare after the last U.S. combat forces leave that country in the coming weeks. Family members are accompanying the interpreters, translators and others on the flights out. The commercial airliner carrying the 221 Afghans in the special visa program, including 57 children and 15 babies, according to an internal U.S. government document obtained by The Associated Press, touched down in Dulles, Virginia, just outside Washington, D.C.

Not in control (NYT) Consider these Covid-19 mysteries: In India—where the Delta variant was first identified and caused a huge outbreak—cases have plunged over the past two months. A similar drop may now be underway in Britain. There is no clear explanation for these declines. / In the U.S., cases started falling rapidly in early January. The decline began before vaccination was widespread and did not follow any evident changes in Americans’ Covid attitudes. / In March and April, the Alpha variant helped cause a sharp rise in cases in the upper Midwest and Canada. That outbreak seemed poised to spread to the rest of North America—but did not. / This spring, caseloads were not consistently higher in parts of the U.S. that had relaxed masking and social distancing measures (like Florida and Texas) than in regions that remained vigilant. / Large parts of Africa and Asia still have not experienced outbreaks as big as those in Europe, North America and South America. / How do we solve these mysteries? Michael Osterholm, who runs an infectious disease research center at the University of Minnesota, suggests that people keep in mind one overriding idea: humility. “We’ve ascribed far too much human authority over the virus,” he told me.

Diasporas at the Olympics (Foreign Policy) Cuban athletes at the Tokyo Olympics are evidence of the exodus from the island over the years. By the Cuban sports journalist Francys Romero’s count, more than 20 athletes at the Olympics were born in Cuba but became naturalized in and are now playing for other countries. That’s a group almost one-third the size of Cuba’s own delegation.

Peru’s politics (Foreign Policy) Peru’s new President Pedro Castillo chose Guido Bellido, a congressman and fellow member of his Marxist Free Peru party, as his prime minister as part of a cabinet announcement on Thursday, setting up a tense confirmation battle with the country’s opposition-led Congress. Bellido courted controversy in a local media interview in April when he expressed sympathy for members of Shining Path—a Maoist guerilla group who fought a bloody insurgency during the 1980s and 1990s.

Death toll in Turkish wildfires rises to four, blazes rage on (Reuters) The death toll from wildfires on Turkey’s southern coast has risen to four and firefighters were battling blazes for a third day on Friday after the evacuation of dozens of villages and some hotels. More than 60 wildfires have broken out across 17 provinces on Turkey’s Aegean and Mediterranean coasts this week, officials have said. Villages and some hotels have been evacuated in areas popular with tourists, and TV footage had shown people fleeing across fields as they watched fires close in on their homes.

Three Jehovah’s Witnesses sentenced to six or more years in Russian prison for their faith (RNS) Three Jehovah’s Witnesses in Russia were convicted and sentenced to prison for practicing their faith on Thursday (July 29). Vilen Avanesov, 68, was sentenced to six years, and his son Arsen Avanesov, 37, along with a third defendant, Aleksandr Parkov, 53, were both sentenced to six-and-a-half years. All three men have already spent more than two years in pretrial detention. “These men should never, ever have had to spend a minute in prison, and yet they’ve been locked up for two years,” said Rachel Denber, deputy director of Human Rights Watch’s Europe and Central Asia division. The three Jehovah’s Witnesses were detained in Rostov-on-Don in May 2019 and accused of continuing the operations of a Jehovah’s Witness organization that had been liquidated. All three were charged with organizing extremist activities. In January 2020, Arsen Avanesov was also accused of “financing extremist activities” by collecting donations to rent a room to meet with other Jehovah’s Witnesses. Near the trial’s conclusion, Arsen Avanesov spoke of his devotion to God: “I dedicated my life to him and did it sincerely. … I don’t want, I can’t and will not give up my promise.” The sentences for the three men are considered particularly harsh in a country where rape is punishable by three years in prison and kidnapping by five. The sentencing follows a 2017 ruling that categorizes the religious group as “extremist.”

Myanmar leaders ‘weaponizing’ COVID-19, residents say (AP) With coronavirus deaths rising in Myanmar, allegations are growing from residents and human rights activists that the military government, which seized control in February, is using the pandemic to consolidate power and crush opposition. Supplies of medical oxygen are running low, and the government has restricted its private sale in many places, saying it is trying to prevent hoarding. But that has led to widespread allegations that the stocks are being directed to government supporters and military-run hospitals. At the same time, medical workers have been targeted after spearheading a civil disobedience movement that urged professionals and civil servants not to cooperate with the government, known as the State Administrative Council. “They have stopped distributing personal protection equipment and masks, and they will not let civilians who they suspect are supporting the democracy movement be treated in hospitals, and they’re arresting doctors who support the civil disobedience movement,” said Yanghee Lee, the U.N.’s former Myanmar human rights expert and a founding member of the Special Advisory Council for Myanmar. “With the oxygen, they have banned sales to civilians or people who are not supported by the SAC, so they’re using something that can save the people against the people,” she said. “The military is weaponizing COVID.”

North Korea began the summer in a food crisis. A heat wave and drought could make it worse. (Washington Post) At the beginning of the summer, North Korean leader Kim Jong Un described the country’s food situation as “tense” after border closures caused by the coronavirus pandemic and crippling floods. By midsummer, a cycle of grinding heat and record-low rainfall could be a sign of a greater food crisis and hunger ahead. Temperatures in North Korea have climbed as high as 102 degrees in some areas this week—a shock in a country where temperatures do not often break 100 degrees. The heat wave has been compounded by a growing drought. North Korea had gotten 21.2 millimeters, or less than an inch, of rain as of mid-July. It is so hot that state media reports have been repeatedly warning residents about the dangers of dehydration and low sodium levels, especially for the elderly and those at risk of heart disease or stroke. They are urging residents to stay out of the sun, eat more fruits and vegetables, and drink more than two liters (about two quarts) of water per day, according to NK News, which monitors North Korea’s state media.

Hong Kong protester given 9-year term in 1st security case (AP) A pro-democracy protester was sentenced Friday to nine years in prison in the closely watched first prosecution under Hong Kong’s national security law as the ruling Communist Party tightens control over the territory. Tong Ying-kit, 24, was convicted of inciting secession and terrorism for driving his motorcycle into a group of police officers at a July 1, 2020, rally. He carried a flag bearing the banned slogan, “Liberate Hong Kong, revolution of our times.” Tong’s sentence was longer than the three years requested by the prosecution. He faced a possible maximum of life in prison. Tong’s sentence is a “hammer blow to free speech” and shows the law is “a tool to instill terror” in government critics, Amnesty International’s Asia-Pacific regional director, Yamini Mishra, said in a statement. The law “lacks any exemption for legitimate expression or protest,” Mishra said. “The judgment at no point considered Tong’s rights to freedom of expression and protest.” Defense lawyers said Tong’s penalty should be light because the court hadn’t found the attack was deliberate, no one was injured, and the secession-related offense qualified as minor under the law.

New Zealand rated best place to survive global societal collapse (Guardian) New Zealand, Iceland, the UK, Tasmania and Ireland are the places best suited to survive a global collapse of society, according to a study. The researchers said human civilisation was “in a perilous state” due to the highly interconnected and energy-intensive society that had developed and the environmental damage this had caused. A collapse could arise from shocks, such as a severe financial crisis, the impacts of the climate crisis, destruction of nature, an even worse pandemic than Covid-19 or a combination of these, the scientists said. To assess which nations would be most resilient to such a collapse, countries were ranked according to their ability to grow food for their population, protect their borders from unwanted mass migration, and maintain an electrical grid and some manufacturing ability. Islands in temperate regions and mostly with low population densities came out on top.

Ethiopian roadblock (NYT) Aid workers in Ethiopia claim that an unofficial Ethiopian government blockade has cut off the only road into the conflict-torn region where millions of Ethiopians face the threat of mass starvation. A relief convoy headed for Tigray came under fire on the road on July 18, forcing it to turn around. On Tuesday, the World Food Program said 170 trucks loaded with relief aid were stranded in Semera, the capital of the neighboring Afar region, waiting for Ethiopian permission to make the trek into Tigray. The blockade is intensifying what some call the world’s worst humanitarian crisis in a decade. The crisis comes during an intensifying war, which has deepened ethnic tensions and stoked fears that Ethiopia will collapse. The United Nations estimates that 400,000 people there are living in famine-like conditions, and another 4.8 million need urgent help. The Ethiopian prime minister, Abiy Ahmed, who won the 2019 Nobel Peace Prize, said last week that his government was providing “unfettered humanitarian access” and committed to “the safe delivery of critical supplies to its people in the Tigray region.” However, Mr. Abiy’s ministers have publicly accused aid workers of helping and even arming the Tigrayan fighters, leading to aid workers being attacked at airports, and even killed.

#headlines #news

1 note · View note

mattsammonsez · 4 years

Text

Hockey’s Voice

Sometimes you meet people who embody everything you believe makes a good person. Mike “Doc” Emrick is one of those people, and I enjoyed the few times we interacted in the past 13 years.

Mike “Doc” Emrick in his second home.

When you work in sports broadcasting, your path crosses with the paths of a lot of prominent people, including athletes, coaches, and executives. It’s all part of the job, and admittedly one of the many perks that comes with the territory. While it’s fun to cross paths with these people, there are a select few where you feel blessed that your paths crossed. Mike “Doc” Emrick is one of those people, and you always felt like you knew him and he knew you all your life even if your real life interaction was only 5 minutes. With the announcement from Emrick earlier this week that he is retiring from calling NHL games, I wanted to share a few stories about the times my path fortunately and blessedly crossed with Doc’s.

Like many people my age, we got to know Doc on a regular basis on national television. For me, it was his weekly appearances on the NHL on Fox game of the week in the mid 90’s, as well as numerous New Jersey Devils highlights earlier in the decade as that team was building into a dominant team. In 2005, Doc became the primary voice on the NHL on OLN broadcasts (later Versus, then NBC Sports Network). In 2006, I became the pregame host of Tampa Bay Lightning radio broadcasts, and as I started to settle into my role that season I started gaining new job duties. One of those duties was to pull together guest interviews for our weekly radio show Lightning Hockey Night. In the 2007 playoffs, the Lightning drew the Devils in the first round, and thus my first interaction with Doc would happen as I was trying to get a guest for the program.

We weren’t looking to get Doc on the show as a live guest, but with Doc at the time still calling Devils games I figured he’d be the perfect guest for the show as he was a well-known voice and face even to hockey fans in Florida. Before the morning skate of game 4 with the Lightning up 2-1 in the series, I introduced myself to Doc and asked him if I could get him for just a few minutes to talk about the series. He said he could, and we continued with our usual morning skate routine for the next couple of hours. I hung around the rink until the Devils were done with their skate, and after the locker rooms were closed to the media I approached Doc again to see if he was still able to do a quick interview. This was close to 1 p.m., and with a game starting at 7 or 7:30 that night Doc had plenty of prep to do. Plus his color analyst, the humorous Glenn “Chico” Resch was hungry and wanted lunch. Yet when I politely asked, Doc without hesitation obliged and we sat down in the stands for a few minutes to discuss the series. It was such a special moment, and such a fun interview, I’ve saved it 13 years and counting.

Emrick yucking it up as Jim Carr, the carpet-coiffed play-by-play announcer for the Johnstown Jets in the cult classic film Slap Shot, at Hockeyville USA, 2015.

Fast forward to September 2015. I’m now the Director of Broadcasting & Programming for the Lightning, and I’m on the team plane to Johnstown, Pennsylvania, as the Lightning and Penguins will be squaring off in the first Kraft Hockeyville USA preseason game. Game day was hectic, as the NHL and NBC rolled out the red carpet not only for both teams but for as much Slap Shot as possible since Johnstown was the location of the film shoot 40 years earlier. Along with being that night’s radio engineer for our broadcast, my mission was to pull together as many interviews as possible for a podcast on the event. Knowing the legendary Hanson Brothers would be there, I targeted an interview with them which I was able to score.

The Cambria County War Memorial Arena was opened in 1950, when comforts such as being able to stretch your legs were not baked into many civic building blueprints. In a tiny locker room I waited for the Hansons to come in, and I did so next to Doc who agreed to also do an interview with me once I was done with the Hansons. The Hansons came in, and not only played the part of their characters well for my interview, but they too were incredibly friendly and great to talk to. While the interview went on, there was that brief fleeting moment in my head; “I’m interviewing three of the greatest hockey movie characters while one of the greatest hockey announcers is sitting in the background watching this.” Quite the moment to say the least. After my conversation with the Hansons, I sat down with Doc to talk to him about what the game meant to him, a former college teacher and newspaper writer in Western Pennsylvania 45 years earlier. You could sense in Doc’s eyes and voice this Hockeyville experience in his old backyard with all the Slap Shot fun and frivolity mixed in was quite the moment for him. The Hanson Brothers and Doc interviews were the cornerstone of my podcast, and all these years later it’s still one of my favorite podcasts of more than 100 I did.

Emrick could make any broadcast better, including a Morning Skate Show in desperate need of some good news in 2018.

Fast forward to May 2018. We’re not in the preseason, we’re in the thick of the postseason, and the Lightning are about to battle the Washington Capitals in the Eastern Conference Final. Prior to game one at the morning skate, Doc and I are two of seemingly 200 people gathering around Alex Ovechkin for pregame interviews. We looked on from a distance, laughing more at the spectacle then actually listening to anything Ovechkin was saying. When the scrum was done, I casually asked Doc if we could have him as a guest on our streaming video program The Morning Skate Show when the series shifted to Washington D.C. for game 3. Doc said he wanted to, we just needed to route the request through NBC public relations, which is always a coin flip on if your wish gets granted. Thankfully for us, it was.

Never before did we need a personality like Doc Emrick like we did then. The Caps humiliated the Lightning for two easy wins in Tampa before the series went to our nation’s capital. In planning for the show, we decided to talk as little as possible about the first two games, and simply turn the show into the Doc Emrick talent show. For almost 45 minutes, Doc talked about everything from the NHL playoffs to memories of AHL games in Halifax 40 years ago when birds in the rafters of the old Halifax Forum pooped on the ice during games. At the end of the show he very quietly but confidently reminded our viewers that if any team was able to get out of 0-2 hole to the Caps, it was the Lightning. It was the reassurance and the fun story telling we all needed, and low and behold the Lightning rallied for three-straight wins before the Caps pulled it together and won the series in seven games on their way to their first Stanley Cup championship. As of 2019, it was still one of the most-watched episodes of the show.

Finally, fast forward to October 2019. Two months earlier, I was informed my position was being “eliminated” at the Lightning, but I refused to be eliminated from the scene. Newly hired to provide a weekly Metro Express podcast to the Philadelphia Flyers (and later the Capitals), I arrived at Amalie Arena for a morning skate prior to a Lightning and Penguins game that was being aired nationally on NBC that night. Once I found out Doc was on the call, I knew I needed to get him for a few minutes to talk Metropolitan Division hockey. I saw Doc sitting in the first couple of rows of seats when I arrived, and I quickly slipped in next to him and asked if I could get his thoughts real quickly. Doc was there to study lines and defensive pairings of both teams, and now at the age of 74 had to double-check all players and facts before putting on another flawless broadcast that night. I was very respectful of his time, and as always he was respectful enough to grant me a few minutes of his busy day.

While there were many similarities to that first interview with Doc in 2007, this time around technology would come back to bite me. Feeling satisfied my iPhone would work as a microphone just fine, I started the interview. Midway through Doc’s first answer, my phone started ringing, cutting off the voice memo app I was using. Thankfully I silenced my phone so it merely buzzed, but in my head I was cursing while Doc was talking. There was no way I was going to ask him to start over again, I was just going to have to eat the moment as I feverishly hung up on the call and pressed record on the voice memo again. While I did this without interrupting Doc’s thoughts, I still got a good 7-8 minutes from him and used it in that week’s show. It was special to connect with Doc again, and I was reminded even as a veteran hockey broadcaster at this time to never ever again do an important interview on my iPhone.

Doc’s retirement announcement didn’t come totally as a surprise to me. I figured with COVID-19 still a factor in our lives for at least the next year or two, the last place a 75-year-old cancer survivor needs to be is in a pressurized airplane cabin or travelling from one cold city to another in the winter. And even though Doc is a pro’s pro, it’s extremely difficult to call a game from a television screen. Whoever is named his successor at NBC has some very big shoes to fill.

As for me, my career has moved forward from my exit with the Lightning, and while potentially great things await I don’t know if I’ll be able to cover a daily beat in an NHL arena anytime soon. That’s perfectly fine with me, as I’m always looking for a new challenge and can’t wait to see what is ahead for me and my family. That also adds even more emotional value to the times my path crossed with Doc’s path. Hockey fans have been blessed to have him as a prime voice for decades, and I was blessed to interact with him several times in my career. A visit from this doctor was always welcome in the homes and hearts of hockey fans.

2 notes · View notes

mystery-star · 4 years

Text

Threshold of Space - Chapter 8 Adjusting

Pairing: Spock x OC

Warnings: mentions of death, swearing, mentions of violence

Words: 6757

All Parts:

If you want to be added to the taglist, let me know!

Please do not repost my work on other sites or platforms!

With a groan she tried to turn around when she heard her alarm clock going off. But she couldn’t move and a second later she found out why; Spock was still holding her in his arms.

“Ha-have you been here all night long?”

“No, I have not been here the whole night. Only since I have come to comfort you after your nightmare because I realized that my presence calms you”

“Oh… Thank you” she whispered and pulled away from him to stretch herself. A part of her just wanted to snuggle up to him again and stay like this all day. Instead she turned off the alarm and crawled out of the bed, heading towards the kitchen with a yawn. She inspected his cupboards to see what kind of food he had. “Spock?” she called “What would you like for breakfast?” he didn’t answer and came to the kitchen instead

“I can take care of my own breakfast”

“I know you can but I know that it is Vulcan custom that the guest prepares the meals, especially breakfast”

“Carissa, you do not have to feel obliged to do so”

“But I want to” he raised an eyebrow

“I doubt you are familiar with the recipe”

“Well I might have used my free time during lunch yesterday to read more about the Vulcan meals that you mentioned the day before at my parents’ because I wanted to cook for or with you during my stay here” for a moment, he was silent then he moved closer and kissed her. She instantly pulled him closer and kissed back, cherishing the feeling since he rarely kissed her like that.

“You never cease to fascinate me” he said softly when they parted.

“That coming from a Vulcan must be one hell of a compliment I guess?”

“It is” he confirmed and leaned his forehead against hers before he let go of her “But allow me to assist you with the preparation of breakfast”

“If you insist”

-oO0Oo-

Spock had finished eating before she did and left the table only to return with a PADD

“As I have promised, I did my best to retrieve your data. However, you will need to verify if everything you need was transferred to this PADD. I would have done it myself but it would have been an invasion of your privacy. Furthermore, I would not have been able to determine if everything is available in any case since I did not know what you had on your previous device”

“That’s fine. Thank you, you’re a gem” she gently squeezed his hand “I promise that I won’t look at your stuff either” she switched it on and entered her password “Huh? My password doesn’t work”

“This is because the password is device-specific”

“Oh right. So what’s the password then?”

“GlQrTbw%xiPeO36Dh7”

“Wait what?” he repeated it “No, Spock change that, there’s no way I can ever remember that”

“But it is a safe password, seeing as it would take a computer 4 quadrillion 528 trillion 200 billion years to ascertain it”

“Uhh Spock…. I don’t think that’s necessary. I mean I doubt the PADD will still be working then… Besides, it’s only school PADD, no one would make such an effort to hack it. And if they manage… well they deserve my essays. Besides, if you leave this password I’ll need to write it down and then they won’t need those four quadrillion years to crack it… Can’t I just use my old password?”

“I recommend you used random letters instead of words”

“Fine… let me think…I guess I’ll just take the first letter of a word from a sentence…” she couldn’t remember random letters, so she’d need an easy way to remember it and suddenly she had an idea. She could just add numbers and a special character “OrtrtaOrtftOrtbtaaitdbt” she said with a grin. “Oh and I guess I could add a percentage sign somewhere and maybe numbers” a frown appeared on his forehead and he was silent for almost a minute, then he raised an eyebrow

“How did you come to know of the inscription of the One Ring in John Ronald Reuel Tolkien’s work ‘Lord of the Rings’?”

“What the fuck? How did you figure that out?”

“I have noticed a pattern in your ‘password’ and an analysis revealed that it must be this fictional inscription”

“Wow” she said, utterly impressed “If I ever need to hack a PADD or computer I won’t use a computer. I’ll use you… but I think you’re trying to tell me I should take something else?”

“As I said, your suggestion contains repetitive patterns which you should avoid” she grunted

“Fine, let me think”

-oO0Oo-

Happy with her new password (she doubted her boyfriend liked it because he said it could be cracked in 4.28 years but she promised that she’d get her new PADD in a couple of days anyway) she got ready for Academy and then left the apartment. Nicole was already awaiting her

“Girl, you’re in for a though questioning tonight. I’ve had plenty of time to think of thousands of questions”

“Something tells me that’s a bit exaggerated”

“But one now already: How was your first night at his place? You-you didn’t?”

“Hell no. We’re nowhere that far”

“What’s the furthest you went?”

“Let me put it like this. His hand purposely only went below my waist about two or three times”

“This week or all the time you were together?”

“All the time”

“What about kissing? I mean… you’ve done that, right? And I’ve heard about this thing with the finger kiss”

“Yes we have kissed and the thing with the fingers technically isn’t a kiss. More like handholding for married couples. However, it can be a sort of making out if you move your fingers against each other”

“So did you guys… make out the Vulcan way? How’s that even working?” she raised fore- and middle finger and looked at her

“I’m not showing you and I won’t answer the question”

“Why not?”

“Because it means a lot to Vulcans and I respect that. You wouldn’t show an alien friend how humans make out because they don’t know. If you have a human boyfriend”

“Okay, I get it… but since touching means a lot to them, doesn’t he get jealous when… I don’t know, human boys touch you in a friendship-like manner or shake hands with you?”

“We’ve had a talk about this and he said that he had to accept the fact that humans are like that. But I have the feeling that he’s not entirely pleased about it”

“Did you guys ever fight?”

“We had… disagreements but it never really ended in a fight. Because you need negative emotions on both sides for that, like Bennett said.”

“Oh right” the teacher arrived and they entered the classroom. Carissa used the couple of minutes she had left to check her messages. She had gotten three other invitations to interviews for her traineeship and Starfleet Command requested her to let them know once she had a new PADD. By the time the lesson started, she had answered everything important and somehow it felt as if the incidents from a few days ago had not happened. At least not what concerned her education.

-oO0Oo-

Starfleet Command had answered and asked her to see them after she was done with classes for the day. Nicole seemed surprised and a little disappointed because she thought they’d had to postpone their talk about Carissa’s relationship. The brunette had no idea what she preferred, the meeting with Fleet Command or being pumped about her boyfriend. Probably the latter because that was less formal and she could leave or tell her friend to stop if she didn’t like it. On the other hand, she was curious to find out what exactly the Command wanted from her but she had a feeling it had to do with her report about the mission.

After she promised to meet Nicole in the library when the meeting was over, Carissa left the Academy. As it seemed, she was already awaited by three members of Starfleet Command.

“Cadet Wiley, we are glad you could make it”

“Sorry if I’m late, Sir”

“No, you are not” he gave her a sympathetic nod “Alright, let’s begin. Firstly, we want to express our sympathy that you were involved in these events”

“It’s okay. I mean… no one could have known what would happen” she got told that they needed her to write a report because so far they only had one side of the story, the logs and reports of the Enterprise.

“Unfortunately, there were no log entries from the USS Vengeance because Admiral Marcus has died before he had the chance to do so. The rest of the crew was killed when the ship crashed, leaving you as the only survivor of the crew”

“I understand. But I don’t remember everything that has happened and uh… I was getting hysteric towards the end so I don’t know how objective I can write this report”

“We know that you are only a Cadet and were absolutely not prepared to file a report, so we know that we probably will never know everything that has happened, but anything you can tell us will be a help. We have decided that it would not be fair to let you do this alone”

“That’s great. Thank you. Who will be helping me?”

“Since we don’t want too many people knowing the truth before we know everything, we deemed it best if you work together with someone who was involved into the whole matter. The Enterprise’s First Officer, Commander Spock, has agreed to assist you” she couldn’t help but smile “Unfortunately he couldn’t make it today but he has assured us that you know a way to make contact with him”

“Yes, I do” she had to bite back a grin

“Very well. Is there something else you need to know?”

“Uhm… it doesn’t actually have to do with the report but something else… I don’t know if you know what I mean but at some point during this mission, I have called you, Starfleet Command, for help when Admiral Marcus ordered to destroy the Enterprise… will-will I be in trouble because of that?”

“We cannot say this for sure now, since we can only decide the next steps after we have all the facts - in other words, your report. But I believe there won’t be any consequences for you because I doubt that anyone will officially accuse you for what you did. It can happen, however, that this incident of arbitrary act is mentioned in your file”

“Which is not as bad as it sounds because for all we know you were under stress and fear when you did it and you only wanted to do what seemed right, so maybe it could even turn out to be a positive note” before she left, they reminded her to keep this a secret until they made the information of Admiral Marcus’ act of treason public. Feeling happier than before, Carissa left the office and returned to the Academy to meet Nicole.

-oO0Oo-

“Alright” Nicole said, after they had found a quiet spot for themselves “I’m dying to know how you two met. I mean sure, you met in class, but you must have met outside class at some point”

“Ah yes…” she chuckled “Oliver and his homies were waiting for me somewhere and well… did as they always do. I tried to remain calm what seemed to upset them and finally they threatened me with violence. I only told them that this surely was against Academy regulations and then I suddenly heard someone behind me citing the whole article about violence against others from the Academy regulations, as well as the consequences”

“Let me guess, that someone was Spock?”

“Who else?” she giggled “I’m sure Spock’s lectured them for over ten minutes while I tried to hold back a smirk. Oliver and his friends left with a warning. Then he asked me if I was alright or if it didn’t keep at the threat. Before he left he told me that I should let him know if they bothered me again”

“Okay, I must admit that is incredibly cute. But go on”

“Well that was our first contact outside class”

“And how did your story continue?”

“As you know me, I was lagging far behind in his lessons so I once decided to do some catch up work and spent hours in the library, reading more about the topic”

“I think I remember that…”

“Yeah and in the end I felt like I wasn’t any better so I had no choice but to go and ask him after a lesson. That is how I learned that I had been looking at stuff that was too advanced and that the Academy curriculum wouldn’t even cover that. He offered me tutoring instead and we were a group of three cadets who were in his office that day. The others left and for some stupid reason I was dallying because I hoped to have a moment alone with him because yes, I already had a thing for him back then. But then my mom called me and you know how that can go so luckily he left the room but I’m quite sure he heard most of it.”

“Shit, I can imagine that” she grimaced “And then?”

“Well when I was done, he came back and I apologized. He said it was okay and that it was good that I have a close relationship to my family. Then I asked how his was and well… then I realized he’s Vulcan and started stuttering stuff that Vulcans maybe are different then I saw that I was rude and all yeah. But he wasn’t offended at all and explained me everything. He told me of his parents and that is how I learned that he’s only Half Vulcan”

“What? I thought that was just a rumor”

“No, it’s true, his mother is… was human”

“Well I guess that’s better for you, I mean maybe that allows him to show emotion better”

“Maybe. At least this is the reason he is even here and did not stay on Vulcan. Besides, most of them think lesser of humans and in return we’re not overly fond of Vulcans…”

“I don’t mean offense but to a part I understand that… after all Vulcans sometimes tend to brag with their intellect and superiority”

“I know. Spock sometimes does that too but he assured me that there’s no ill intention behind it or that he means to humiliate someone. He said he’s merely pointing out facts or observations. And I mean it is true, Vulcans are more intelligent than we and can do certain things better”

“Yeah. But let’s put that aside… how did your story continue?”

“Right. Before I had to leave because there was something he needed to do, he asked me if Oliver and his friends had bullied me again and if he could do something against it. Because he had heard about the rumors they were spreading about me… you know, teacher’s pet and all”

“And what did you say?”

“I told him not to worry about it and that I could handle it myself. And well, then I left”

“Oh come on, don’t make me ask you everything, just tell me how you got together”

“Okay, alright. It started on the day we had this exam task to repair a shuttlecraft in engineering class”

“The one you almost got electrocuted because of that idiot?”

“Exactly. Well, that happened because he thought he could turn on the power without telling me, while I was working on some cables inside the shuttle and yeah. Luckily, I was working on my PADD right in that moment because otherwise I’d be dead… You know that part already. Then one of the examiners came to us to inquire what happened and held him a lecture about communication and consideration”

“That was Spock, right I’ve seen him there…”

“Exactly. But as you know, I was brought to the sickbay where a first year cadet who was about to do his test, misunderstood electroshock for a normal, psychic shock and gave me a tranquilizer or something. I mean it was exam time so it wasn’t even that wrong that this was the first thing he could think of. Anyways, later that day Spock came to give me back my PADD which he needed to repair because the electric shock that hit me also affected my PADD. And well, I was drugged with a tranquilizer I didn’t need so I started talking shit. No idea what exactly but I must have told him he was cute and how much I liked him and that he’s so caring and all…”

“Well shit”

“So the next day, when I was my normal self again, I was so, so embarrassed that I had to go to him and apologize. I planned to lie and say that I had no idea why I was saying that. Let’s just say he didn’t even let me come that far because he admitted that he too was ‘experiencing likewise’ and all. So uh that was really awkward for me and I suggested we could forget that and continue as if nothing had happened. Then he held me this speech that it would be highly illogical to do so because we both know that we are in love with each other and well… asked me to I was okay if we started a relationship. But I wasn’t happy, I mean him being a professor and all but then he assured me that this would not make a difference and that we just couldn’t talk about anything that had to do with my education and then there would be no reason to fear… he also assured me that he wouldn’t give me preferential treatment and after I asked for some time to consider it, I agreed”

“Oh okay I see. Maybe it was good that cadet gave you the wrong hypo or else you wouldn’t have told him”

“Yeah I guess so”

“Okay, now I want details. Has he ever taken you out on dates?”

“No, we’ve almost only met in his office and a few times in our dorm when you were away. I mean when you were not in San Francisco because we didn’t want to be caught at any cost. That’s also why we never went out”

“Sneaky. Well, you definitely managed to keep it a secret though”

“You really never suspected I have a boyfriend?”

“Sometimes I did… but I thought you would have told me if you ever get one. So when you told me that you broke up, a part of me was mad at you that you didn’t tell me before or who it was. But now I understand. Although I wouldn’t have judged you for being with a Professor. Oh shit, I just realized how disturbing it must have been for you that Oliver and co. were always hinting you had something going on with Bennett”

“To be honest… that didn’t even bother me too much because I knew they were wrong and I had someone better”

“But how-how is it even like to be with a Vulcan? I mean he certainly doesn’t tell you ‘I love you’ all the time”

“In fact he never said it. And you’re right, he generally doesn’t talk much about his feelings, only when it is really important. But he assured me that he cares deeply about me and all until he’d tell me otherwise. So I just need to remember that when I feel like he doesn’t love me anymore. But oh, you should see how sweet he can be. For example, last night I was having nightmares and he stayed with me all night after that and held me in his arms because he knew it comforted me”

“You mean he stayed awake for you?”

“Oh he planned to do that anyway… because I had his bed and he had nowhere else to sleep”

“Okay, if that isn’t love I don’t know. Damn, Cassie, you gotta keep that man”

“That’s what I’m planning to do”

“But how is it like to spend time with him? What do you do?”

“We talk a lot, or play chess or just sit close to each other and he corrected essays while I was doing homework”

“How about touching, cuddling and all?”

“Well, most of it comes from me, I squeeze his arm, hug him or kiss his cheek or whatever. Sometimes he does something in return, like taking my hand in his or hug back. I know this is something that is not usual for Vulcans so it means a lot to me as well when he does that” she giggled “But there are times where he takes the lead, which usually only happens when he would be thrilled by human standards”

“That doesn’t sound too bad, I guess. But don’t you fear he’d leave you for a Vulcan girl one day?”

“We have talked about this shortly and he said that the only reason he’d come together with one was to… well… have a child now that Vulcans are endangered and all”

“And what about you? Could you imagine a whole life with him? I mean there’s probably so much you’d have to give a miss”

“I haven’t really thought about it in the long term but right now I don’t need more. And I can see he’s opening up more and more. At the beginning everything was so awkward and we both didn’t know what to talk and all… now it just comes naturally and yeah. It’s good that Vulcans are quite direct so he tells me when there’s something he doesn’t like, which is why I sometimes just try out stuff like touching him and if he doesn’t react it means he’s fine but when he protests I stop. And we’ve gotten quite good at reading each other and sometimes I am able to know what he’s feeling, well not exactly feeling but you know what I mean”

“How’s that possible? I mean he’s always got this pokerface mien”

“Well, it’s not just about what his mien shows. Because that are only tiny, tiny muscle movements that you’ll miss when you blink in the wrong moment. You also need to think a little, like when someone tells him bad news it’s obvious that this will bother him somehow. However, there is something he often does; raising an eyebrow”

“Ah yes, I know that from the lessons”

“Yes and I’m an expert at reading it. Usually. Sometimes it means something like ‘are you sure?’ but it can also mean something like ‘holy shit’ or ‘what the fuck?’ Or the classic one I get whenever I make a joke ‘Really? Are you serious?’” Nicole chuckled

“Well I was able to see that there are different heights he raises them. But I couldn’t figure out what they mean. Something negative, I thought because that was usual when someone gave a stupid reply”

“Yeah. But it mostly a positive response when I’m around”

“Hmm, I wouldn’t be too sure about that. Who’d feel positive about having you around?” she nudged her side.

“Good I’ll leave” she pretended to pout.

“No, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it Cassie, will you forgive me?”

“Only if you’re nice” she crossed her arms like a toddler

“I promise”

“Okay” she grinned

“But why again did you two break up?”

“Oh right, that is a longer story” she told her friend about her first mission and Nero and the real reason Nero captured her

“And well so he concluded that I would get into danger when I am with him so he decided it is better if we break up”

“Hm well… it kinda makes sense. But that last time you didn’t even need him. I mean, a few days ago”

“Actually… there’s more behind it. But I can’t tell you yet because it wasn’t made official. However, me almost dying and the fact that I wasn’t really safe showed him that he actually wanted to be with me”

“And so he asked you to give him a second chance…”

“Yup. And you know the rest already”

“Apart from what exactly happened when you were on the Vengeance. But you can’t tell me now, I know you also need time to digest it”

“Well… actually I need to file a report for Starfleet Command because I’m the only survivor of the Vengeance”

“An official report?”

“Yes I know. But I’ll get help” she said with a smile.

“That’s good. Oh God, Cassie, I’m happy for you. I mean everything with Spock. And I’m looking forward to meeting him tomorrow”

“Yeah that will be interesting”

“Luckily you’ve told me everything now, so I won’t ask embarrassing questions”

“Believe me, you’ll still do that”

“Just shut up you…” she raised her fist

“Okay, now I’ve told you everything about my love-life. Your turn now. Anyone you fancy?”

-oO0Oo-

She was at the apartment before her boyfriend and decided to try out a new Vulcan meal until he arrived. While cooking, she played some music and sang to it, which was the situation to which Spock returned. He commented the scene with a raise of his eyebrow at what Carissa chuckled.

“Do you want me to turn it off?” she said, pointing at the source of the music.

“No there is no reason to do so”

“Okay. Let me know if you change your mind”

“Are you preparing another meal?”

“No, I’m running an experiment to see at which heat your pans melt”

“This experiment cannot succeed under this circumstances as my stove will never provide enough heat for the cooking utensils to reach their boiling point” she giggled

“Wow, I’m joking about melting your pans and you react that casual?”

“There is no need for concern since I know that what you were planning to do is not possible”

“Well, okay. Logic and knowledge save the day again…”

“If you are not conducting an experiment I conclude that you must indeed be cooking”

“Yup. And you’re not helping this time” he raised an eyebrow before Carissa ushered him out of the kitchen.

-oO0Oo-

After dinner, Carissa worked on her homework while her boyfriend seemed to be working on something on his PADD. After a while, she got up and dragged her chair next to his and sat down only a feet apart. He looked up and glanced at her then focused on his work again. Somehow a part of her believed that there was a flash of joy in his mien. She was sure that they’d get to know each other even better in the time they lived together and she knew this would also have an impact on their relationship.

“I hope you do not mind me working and not spending time with you instead” he suddenly said

“No, it’s fine. I should do some homework anyway. After all I’ll also have to write this report. Thanks by the way, for offering me help. I don’t think I could do it alone”

“This is what I have been thinking as well and come to the conclusion that it would be logical if I helped you, seeing as I was responsible for our report because of the Captain’s death”

“Speaking of the Captain… do you have any idea when he’ll wake up?”

“It is not possible to determine when all cells will be regenerated so Doctor McCoy decided it is better to have him in an induced coma for two weeks”

“Okay” she gave a quick nod, then focused on her essay again.

-oO0Oo-

The following evening, Carissa decided to take care of the report because she wanted to hand it in as soon as possible, so that everything was over quicker. She tried to do it as far as she could so that she then could ask for Spock’s help for the parts she wasn’t sure. Although he had offered her help, she still feared she could bother him with her questions. Even when he assured her again that he didn’t mind she wasn’t too sure.

“Okay anyway… uh… shortly after we got onto the bridge I had a look around and so I missed what Marcus was talking to one of the helmsmen. It may have been important but I can’t say what it was. Do you think I should just leave it out?”

“That would not be advantageous”

“But I can’t write ‘I didn’t pay attention to their conversation’ or something like that”

“Did you have the feeling that the Admiral has not wanted everyone on the bridge to know about the topic of their conversation?”

“Maybe. They were talking quietly, now that I remember…”

“Then I suggest you write that he was engaged in a private conversation with his helmsman”

“That sounds good” she did so with a grin “Then, there’s this part where I wasn’t on the bridge because Admiral Marcus ordered to have me locked up. You know, at around the time I contacted you and when I went to see Jim and Scotty with Khan. Shall I write what happened to me in the time I was away?”

“In this case you would need to make a short notice that you have been led off the bridge earlier. But I would not recommend giving too many details about the incidents you have experienced while you were not on the bridge”

“So you think I should make a note that I was off the bridge and… I don’t know sum up that Jim, Scotty and Khan got onto the ship and came to the bridge?”

“Technically, Mr Scott had been on the ship ever since its departure, but I believe your suggestion is appropriate”

“Okay” she made a note that she could write this later on to ask her last question “And when we got onto the bridge, well Marcus and Jim had a discussion and I guess I’ve got most of it. But somehow I can’t remember what else happened. Sure, Khan knocked us all down and… I think he was the one who killed the Admiral. But I honestly can’t tell if something else has happened. Do you think this is because he hit my head against the chair before my brain could transfer the information to my long term memory?”

“That is exactly my thinking” he looked at her “I can understand this must be hard for you but there may be a way for me to find out if your memory is fragmentary or if you have merely repressed them” he raised his hand and she understood what he had in mind “Unless you are not able or willing to relive these moments” she swallowed

“This is important. Maybe Marcus has said something very important. If there’s a chance you can find out more…”

“Carissa, you are not obliged to do this. The Captain, Mr Scott or Lieutenant Marcus will be inquired about the incidents in either case. Moreover, if there should be any repressed memory you had a reason to suppress it and I cannot be the reason that it is brought back to the surface before you are ready”

“Spock” she said, placing a hand on his face “I know you’re concerned about me but Starfleet Command made me responsible for this report so I have to do this” he gave a nod

“Then please try to think of the events on the bridge” she closed her eyes and did as he said, when she felt his fingers on her face and seconds later she had the feeling to actually be back on the Vengeance. And relived the moments. Had it been any other moment of her life, she probably would have found it amazing. Obviously Spock had found something because she couldn’t remember that Khan had threatened Jim and Scotty to kill her if they didn’t drop their weapons. But that wasn’t even the worst part, she felt like she was about to vomit when she heard the cracking of Marcus’ skull again. Luckily Spock broke the connection seconds later when Khan hailed the Enterprise again. Carissa felt tears in her eyes and for some reason she tried to turn around but her boyfriend was quicker and pulled her against him, apologizing for what he did.

“It’s fine. I just need a moment… it felt so real”

“I know it did and I could sense your emotions of this moments as well”

“But did you find anything?”

“No, it does not seem as if you have memory gaps and I also could not find anything that you had repressed”

“What about the moment Khan took me hostage to threaten the others? I mean I couldn’t remember it before”

“This was not a repressed memory, you have only been unable to retrieve it at the moment, but I could”

“Oh okay. Do you think I need to write that? I mean it’s the explanation why Jim and Scotty couldn’t overpower Khan”

“I think it would be wise to mention it” she nodded “as for the last part, the one where Khan has been talking to you… I somehow don’t remember much of it but I guess that won’t matter because you must have mentioned that in your report already?”

“Correct. If you are unsure which phrasing you should use to describe your circumstances I am willing to help”

-oO0Oo-

Somehow Carissa had gotten used to living with her boyfriend and somehow she hoped the Academy had longer to rebuild new dorms towers. After all she had realized how much their relationship had progressed in the past days. It wouldn’t have been much for a relationship with a human but it filled her with joy that Spock had developed the habit to kiss her goodbye before he left in the morning. Plus, their evenings weren’t just filled with both of them working on their own projects but talking or games as well. Much to Carissa’s delight he allowed her to sit on his lap and snuggle against him. Of course he didn’t always pay much attention to her since he was often working on his PADD but she didn’t mind.

Almost two weeks after the incidents on the Vengeance Jim was woken from his coma. Since it was on her free day, she asked Spock if he’d take her with him and to her surprise he agreed. They met Doctor McCoy in front of Jim’s room

“Oh there is my second Jesus” he said with a grin as recognized Carissa

“I wasn’t actually dead. Only clinically”

“Yeah but you were that close to dead-dead” he held his forefinger and thumb half an inch apart.

“Well thanks I you I wasn’t. And I doubt ‘dead-dead’ is a correct medical term”

“Damn it, being with the hobgoblin made you almost as insufferable as him”

“How-how did you know?” she looked to her boyfriend

“I’m not blind, Carissa, I saw the way he held and looked at you he was in the Sick Bay when we thought we’d lose you. I’ve never seen him like that before and I doubt I ever will again” Carissa glanced at Spock again “So you guys do whatever you want, no reason to keep it a secret from me anymore”

“Thanks” Carissa said, not really knowing how she should feel about him knowing.

“Oh and besides, now that you’re already here, I’d like to check you up real quick to make sure you’re not getting any kind of consequential damage”

“Okay” she agreed with a shrug and they entered the room. It took Jim about half an hour before he finally woke up but like her, he didn’t seem like someone who had been severely injured, respectively dead. Although, as McCoy explained he was weak because he had been in a coma and only gotten an infusion during that time. After a short conversation with her boyfriend, Jim turned to Carissa

“Glad you made it too”

“Well when they already were reviving you they did the same to me, logically” she replied with a shrug

“Luckily. I wouldn’t want to spend the rest of my career with a gloomy Vulcan as my First Officer” Spock only raised an eyebrow and Carissa chuckled “Even though you’re not talking to each other right now” he tried to sit up, making the Doctor protest “Oh leave it Bones, you said it yourself, I was barely dead” he pushed his hand away and sat up, for what he eventually needed his friend’s help anyway. “But I’ve got to use my second chance and play Cupid” he smiled at the brunette “He still loves you that is for sure. You should have seen him after Admiral Marcus wanted to beam you onto the Enterprise”

“Captain, I do not think that Carissa should…”

“Oh yes, I think she should know” he smirked and turned back at Carissa “He seemed like a hysterical hen and grabbed my arm, almost shouting at me to tell him what Marcus was gonna do, beam you onto the Enterprise or not”

“I did not ‘grab’ your arm, I merely made physical contact with it. Moreover, a Vulcan would never shout”

“Well okay, but you were upset that could be heard in your voice” he winked at Carissa who let out a giggle “Or you should have seen him wince after Khan banged your head against that chair. There was terror in his eyes for almost a second before he caught himself”

“Captain, I appreciate your help concerning my relationship but I have to inform you that your attempt is belated”

“What? Belated? Does that mean you’re together again? Why didn’t you tell me straightaway?”

“What’s that supposed to mean, together again? You have been together before and broke up?”

“I would rather not discuss that here and now” Spock said

“Fine, I’ll just ask Carissa when I’m examining her” she glanced at Spock who agreed with a nod. “Ah wow, that’s typical. Let’s let the woman do the talking, huh?” again her boyfriend raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

-oO0Oo-

Much to her surprise Spock waited for her until she was done with her examination and McCoy’s questioning.

“I’ve wanted to ask you this ever since you made that deal with Khan, to give him back his torpedoes” she told him on their way home “How could you be so sure he would betray you, I mean according to McCoy you pulled quite a stunt with removing Khan’s people from the torpedoes and arming them… that could have gone terribly wrong”

“It only seemed logical that he would try to get his crew back, which was something I could not allow. Besides, I have had help, the idea was not entirely my own”

“Who?”

“Mr Spock”

“You mean your future self?” she shrugged “I believe he told you that he would not help you”

“Indeed he did”

“So this means he must have met Khan too in his life?”

“That is correct. He described him as the most dangerous enemy he has ever faced” suddenly it hit her. She remembered why she had thought to have heard Khan’s name before.

“I think I know why he helped you” he raised an eyebrow in surprise “You know, that day I met him after Vulcan’s destruction, he has told me a bit about me. I mean the Carissa in his timeline. And he told me that Khan was responsible for… my death” she glanced at him and could see him swallow.

“He has informed me that the costs of his defeat were high but I would not have expected him to be affected personally by this”

“And that’s not all” she said “At the time the other Carissa died, she was pregnant” it was obvious that he didn’t like that information either

“He did not tell me about this”

“Probably because he knew it could distract you” her boyfriend agreed and it was obvious that he didn’t like the topic. If she was honest, she understood why, and didn’t feel too comfortable either. As if he needed to assure himself she was here, he took hold of her hand for the rest of the way.

Next Chapter

#star trek #Star Trek Fanfiction #fanfiction #spock #spock fanfiction #spock x oc

21 notes · View notes

myivfjourney · 4 years

Text

Naps? Yes please!!

9/3/20

Ok, so it's been a few days since I've written - alot has happened!

Quick update to my last few lines in my prior post.

I got the "go ahead" from the doctor to begin stims..the TSH of 3.5 doesn't seem to be a current concern.

My husband got the job and signed his offer today ! Yay!

My meds didn't come on the Thursday like expected inspite being in the phone for 2 hours dealing with it. They came Friday after further investment of time.

Anyways...

Backtracking to last week of August...

I finished the last birth control pill August 24 and was so ready to move to the next step. I had so much back and forth phone calls with the specialty pharmacy that my meds came the Friday. I day before I needed to start them although my doctor and I confirmed the orders weeks prior. I was so upset. Had I not called to verify a few days prior it would have not made it in time. Always very people.

Anyways we begun stims on Saturday August 29th. My husband and I rewatched the videos to be sure we were "doing it right" ...we made it out the first night alive. Menopur stings ladies! But the good news is it does go away after like 1 minute.

I'm on day 6 of Stims right now and all I want to do these past few days is nap.

The stims have gifted me a small lingering headache and complete tiredness. YAY!..u really shouldn't have.

On the same day we begun stims I started spotting and by Sunday I had a heavy flow. Monday morning I couldn't wait to call and find out ...apparently its "withdrawal bleeding" from the birth control and also my uterus is shedding its lining. Since it measured 8" last time, I had lot to lose thus bleeding for 2 more days. I'm spotting today..still pink..but hoping it stops soon.

Last night I had to get 3 injections because the re-inject pen for Gonal would only give me a dose of 100IU since we've used 200 IUs each night thus far as my dosage (it comes as 900) ..but..the night before somehow when my hubby injected me, only 175 IUs discharged so I needed another shot of 25 to even out the 200. So needless to say two nights in a row I've had 3 stabs to the belly...how lovely! I've gotten use to it so its fine.

I visited the doctors office on Wednesday (yesterday) and looks like we're pacing well. They want to see me tomorrow again for further monitoring.

Can I just tell you about my left overies for a quick sec? I mean..I've already covered my periods so why not.

My left girl seems to be hiding out behind my uterus down under. So finding her is always a bitch. The nurse looked for a good few minutes before giving up. She then called in the doctor to look around for her. I waited about 5-8mins on the bed (on my period) after being poked around with the probe for several minutes. When the doctor came, in order to find her, I was asked to literally turn and lie on my right butt cheek while the probe was inside ...only then Ms. Lefty graced us with her presence....they got the picture they needed.. ( when he saw her I heard him count out to 10 but I didn't ask what it was..follicles? ) Gosh I hate this process. It's so gross. I wonder if it will be this hard when I'm going in for egg retrieval? I can't go on my right butt cheek under sedation...oh my God. The cramps that will follow...

I am hopeful for tomorrow's visit. I'm starting to feel very "lumpy" in the sides of my belly. Something is happening ...aka...growing!

The doctor didn't say anything about follicles yesterday so you bet your ass I'm asking tomorrow. I need to know what we're working with here. I was instructed to stay on my current dosage of meds until next visit.

Cheers to good news tomorrow. God knows I need it.

On a different note outside of IVF -

I lost my Job on Tuesday Sept. 1, 2020! My position was eliminated and I'm now a statistic of the wrath of Covid. I dont want to get emotional but sometimes I can't help but feel defeated. I need to find a sense of worth and value. I haven't spoken to my best friend or anyone about this process, my career downturn and how I'm feeling. Partly because I don't want to be pitied and treated "special" like a delicate lamb or something. You are my only outlet of expressing how I feel. The anonymity helps for transparency.

With my body not able to conceive naturally I've had to turn to science for my miracle....and thank heavens for science... while its a challenging process I was ..and still am..going to be strong and positive through it. But, things like losing the job you loved so much and the amazing benefits that it provides is a big hit. I had an amazing position with an amazing company...amazing compensation and worked with amazing people...and now its all gone. Officially on September 18 my coverage ends. Luckily my egg retrieval should be well before then.

My doctor will most likely opt for a frozen transfer (higher success rates) so that puts me into October and I feel like I'm in limbo. Do I still apply for jobs now knowing I have so many doctors visits still upcoming and when I get pregnant will I face any discrimination and not be hired?

I never heard back anything from the job interview last week btw. I must have applied to about 50 job postings at this point. No interviews and a few rejections but mostly crickets.

Am I worrying too much? 😕

Well you try going through Stims...tell me how you feel.

My hubby's position was also eliminated and so he was technically out of a job for a week. But his boss ( same company) before he got promoted reached out with an opportunity. He interviewed and got the job. So he's back reinstated with his company after 1 week and starts this new role (promotion with more pay) on Tuesday after the holiday. Crazy times I tell you.

Anyways...as usual I chirp away...more to come after my visit tomorrow.

Off to take another nap.....yawns!!!

#ivfwarrior #ivfjourney #ivf #ivfsupport #ttc #ttccommunity #ttc baby 1 #ttcsupport #infertility #infertility sucks #infertilitysucks #infertilitysupport

2 notes · View notes

tolkien-in-beleriand · 4 years

Text

so a number of people is curious about PhD here in Brazil and as I have nothing else I want to do right now let me tell you about it

I’ll talk about the two processes I went through for my PhD (masters is kinda the same but a bit simpler)

as I already told you here in Brazil the best universities are free, it’s kinda hard to get in but if you do you have the best education available in the country and chances are you will get some kind of scholarship. in my case as I am poor as hell I had a scholarship since first year of grad school and also a place to live. yes, I was paid to live in a nice city away from my abusive family and to study in the best program of my field in Brazil

then came the masters in which I also had a scholarship

and then the nightmare begins

see as part of my scholarship I had to finish my masters in two years. what does it mean? it means that in my second year I was writing my masters dissertation, finishing papers, preparing for qualification, then argumentation, writing my PhD project and preparing for the PhD tests

and of course as you probably know by now I love complicating things so I applied for two PhDs programs. why? only God knows, but I did. now each university has its own way to deal with PhDs applications so I’ll tell you about the two kinds of tests I had to go through

first my home university:

first you write a project. 20 pages. must have: abstract, key words, title, introduction, methodology, cronogram of activities, bibliographic references. it must present a certain novelty in the idea, they want something new, a thesis (that I will later prove right or wrong in 200 to 300 pages). my thesis was basically “Fantasy is a literature genre and it IS NOT the same as fantastic literature (don’t get me started - I wrote a PhD thesis about it but I’m still bitter)”

you need to hand this project in September. then in October is the written test. in our field the written test (in this particular university, as I said it varies) is: they pick a literary topic, that is a surprise only reveled to us mortals the day and hour of the test, and we have four hours to write an essay about it, in a room like an exam, no researches allowed. the topic in my year was History and Literature. then they grade the essay 0-10 and you need at least a 7 to go to next phase.

fine, now the few people who got the 7 go to phase “analyzing the project”. you get a grade on that too. and you need a 7 to pass as well.

then if you are lucky enough to have your project accepted you go to phase “interview” when a board will make all kinds of questions about your study, project, plans, you know... to make sure you were the one who wrote the thing and know what you’re talking about (I just need to mention here that at my interview they said my project was perfect and made 0 questions because, and I quote, “we know your trajetory and we know what you are capable of and no one else studies Fantasy Literature here”)

then they grade the interview. if you didn’t get at least a 7 bye bye bird, it doesn’t matter if your project was perfect and you aced the written test, it’s goodbye

after this they add all the scores and divide by something and if your final score is below 7, that’s goodbye too.

then you need to do the language test because oh yes YOU DO NEED TO KNOW TWO FOREIGN LANGUAGES to be accepted in any PhD program here.

and that’s it for my first application. I passed first place. usually the good programs gets scholarships and our program was very good so we had like six scholarships every year for sure and then maybe more. they give the scholarships according to the final score so yep I got it

but... when I traveled for my second PhD application I still didn’t have any of my scores, I didn’t even know if I had passed the written test and let me tell you I was desperate and honest to God terrified I wouldn’t pass

anyway, now process number two:

they make things quite different there and they are way more demanding so I was just really terrifie that I would end the year with a crappy masters and no PhD perspective.

first test they do is the language one, a translation and ooooh boi do I hate translating stuff. but it was okay, I wasn’t worried about that part. the system there was very different. while at my home university the process was spread through months, here you had three days of tests and if you failed the first day you are not even invited for the next day. again, you need 7 to pass.

so first day: language test, 52 people applying. 20 passed for day two, me included.

second day, written test. I knew they had a different style from my home university but I was not prepared for that. they gave you 10 questions, all about literature. you had to pick five and answer. so you kinda had to write 5 mini essays on 5 different topics and the questions were like “in the page 25 of the essay Memory in Baudelaire by Walter Benjamin the author express a view on how experience play a central part in the story of the narrative genre. comment on that.”

one of them was to “comment on” the trajetory of the novel as a genre. I read the 10 questions then I started laughing. then I noticed the Professor in the class was the one I wanted as my supervisor there (she is like a big deal in Fantasy studies), the one who, in two months, would be in the board of my masters argumentation. I started crying. so much. I had to be escorted to the bathroom to “calm down”. well, I thought, it’s over, I better not even come back to the exam room and save me the embarrassment of looking the Professor in the eyes. but I couldn’t do that. I had to at least convince myself that I did everything I could. so I went back and started answering the ones I thought I had a shot at. we had four hours too and after doing my darnest to answer 4 questions I wanted to die before having to answer one more. so I chose the novel one because, you know it’s not that hard to trace a genealogy of the novel as a genre. but I was so tired. so incrediby tired and I thought I won’t pass anyway so I might as well have some fun. and friends, what did I do? I wrote a mini novel where my protagonist was the novel “living” through all its phases. I can’t remember a word of that but I did it.

when I was back to the hotel I started crying so much and felt so guilty, I was sure I would fail both programs. next morning the result would be on campus and honestly I only went there because I had spent too much money to just ignore the result, I would never have peace if I didn’t check. but I was really really sure I didn’t pass so I checked out the hotel, got into a taxi, asked him to take me to campus for two minutes, so I could check a thing, and then he could take me to the station

ooooh I have no words to describe my happiness when I looked to a list of FIVE names who had got through to the next phase and my name was there.

I still can’t believe it and until this day I wonder what kind of crap did people write because they considered my “novel is a protagonist of a novel” answer over other 15????

anyway so I was happy but fucked because I had checked out the hotel so I had no place to go and the interview would be only at 5pm so there I was full of bags wandering around the campus waiting for my interview.

interview time: board with two fucking specialists in the Fantasy field and an ass who thinks she is above this. I was very nervous, they asked a bunch of questions about my project (oh yeah I forgot to say you had to hand a project like in the other uni and it is considered part of your application as well) and then... last question... from the ass “why do you consider fantasy as literature” I froze, the other two smiled (they knew my reputation). I want to murder that woman. why do I consider fantasy as literature? WHY?? son of a motherfucking bitch. so I smile*** and ask “what do you study?” she answers “Goethe” with an air of superiority. I say “oh I love Goethe, he is magnificent and the way he.... bla bla bla” I was just showing off. then I say “now think about why you consider Goethe literature. that’s your answer.” I want to say that if I had a mic I would drop it but nah... if I had a mic I would probably make that bitch eat it.

they didn’t have score there, you only passed or failed. I passed. one of five. from 52. I got a scholarship there too, but I decided to stay home. my supervisor at my uni was amazing and a wonderful person and so so smart and funny and he is in a band and is super cool and nerdy, also one of my best friends and one of the most successful translators in Brazil

so yes. this is two of the possibles processes you can go through to get in a top PhD program. and that friends is the easy part. seriously, masters and doctorates are exhausting and it breaks you. neurotypicals get mental illnesses because of it and honest to God I don’t know how I managed it. neither does my doctors. no, actually I know. it was spite.

*** funny story: because of an incident in my masters interview, before my PhDs interviews my supervisor called me to “teach me how to interact with stupid people”. he basically told me I was not supposed to laugh at a stupid question, I was not supposed to death stare the board after a stupid question and, of course, I was not allowed to get up and leave. because I did all that in my masters interview and almost didn’t get into the program. then he made me pretend he was the board talking shit and I had to smile and take notes. his words “it doesn’t matter if you are writing a curse and planning that person’s murder, smile and take notes.”

in my defence I did all that because in my masters interview a Professor asked me if I knew that Tolkien was an author who died in the 70s and that The Lord of the Rings wasn’t just a movie. after I laughed and asked if she was joking she got mad and then I tried to explain that yes, I did in fact know that John Ronald Reuel Tolkien, born in January 3rd, 1892 and dead in September, 2nd, 1973, was an author and wrote the book called The Lord of the Rings who inspired Peter Jackson’s trilogy. then I pointed out that my study had nothing to do with The Lord of the Rings, book or movie. I was in fact studying Tolkien’s essay “On Fairy Stories” and how critics point out The Lord of the Rings as the base of moderny fantasy without noting that Tolkien himself wrote the theory I consider the foundation of fantasy as a genre. then she said “that was done before” and I said “no it wasn’t, surprisingly enough people never came to this conclusion until now” and she looked me in the eyes and asked “are you sure? did you do a deep and careful research on the matter?” and I said “yes I did” and I swear to God she asked “did you try google it?”

yep I just got up and left. did I try google??? are you fucking serious? yes I did, when I wasn’t even at the uni yet you moron. google. can you believe it? I was reading papers from Oxford and Cambridge and this ass ask me if I used google.

I had a very bad score at my masters interview but my supervisor loved it anyway.

so that’s it. I hope it helps to have an idea how things work around here.

#phdblr #phd #masters #academic life #long post #very loooong post

7 notes · View notes

heyyyharry · 5 years

Text

My Girl Series: Chapter 6 - This Time

…in which Y/N needs a wedding date, and this time Harry’s not giving up.

Series description: Y/N falls in love with the older boy next door who doesn’t feel the same, years later they meet again at a funeral.

AU: actor!harry, older!harry, younger!y/n; (4-year age gap)

Chapter 5: Somebody Else - Once upon a time, there was a girl and a boy, and no one else.

A little happy gift from sad Allie 😂 You’re welcome.

wattpad link

It had been two weeks since the last time Y/N saw Harry.

Like a ghost, he disappeared into thin air without a single clue only to reappear on a sunny Thursday afternoon via a simple text, saying he was waiting for her outside her flat and that it was an emergency. When she received that message, Y/N was in the library and had to drop everything at once to rush back home for him.

It was not until she had run up five floors and saw him standing outside her door with the brightest smile on his face, intact, that she realized she had been worried all for nothing.

"Hey, Bam—Ouch!" He jumped away, rubbing the sore spot on his arm where she'd just hit him, mouth agape. "What was that for?"

"'Come home quick. Emergency'? Emergency my ass! I was shit-scared when I read your text."

"This is an emergency." He bent down and picked up the paper bag at his feet. "I bought you ice cream and it's melting."

"Ice cream?" She dropped her jaw, hands on her hips. "I thought something bad had happened to you, H!"

"You thought I was in trouble and came home right away?"

Y/N rolled her eyes in response to that idiotically gorgeous smile of his, yet she decided not to answer that question.

"What's the occasion?" She asked, eyes fixed on the paper bag full of snacks he was carrying. She didn't understand why he looked so shocked as if she was supposed to know the answer already.

Wait, am I supposed to?

It took the girl a moment to remember the date, and when she had, she felt like the shittiest person alive.

It was her mother's birthday.

When they were little, Harry had always helped her prepare a small birthday party for her mother each year. They would make cupcakes and birthday cards together. Now that her mother was gone, he knew it was meaningless to come over with ice-cream for her and flowers for her mum since there was nothing left to celebrate. But he felt like he should, hoping his presence would count for something.

"I can't believe I forgot mum's birthday," she groaned into her palms, mentally cursing herself for being so thoughtless. But he knew it wasn't her fault, she didn't mean to forget. A lot of things had happened in her life recently, starting from her dad's engagement, to her struggles with her unfinished first novel, her unpaid rents, and then of course...him.

Harry was just about to say something when the girl lifted her face up, eyes squinted at him. "How did you..."

"Your dad told me you always visited her on her birthday..."

"My dad? Are you best friends with him now?"

"No, I just—"

"Don't." She raised a finger so he wouldn't continue, and he was waiting for her to tell him to leave. To his surprise, she didn't this time. She just took a long pause and asked him if he could give her a ride to the train station, so she could catch the next train back to Cheshire.

Y/N assumed a famous actor like Harry didn't have much free time to spare, and she really had to think twice before asking him for such a favor. After all, he had his own busy life, he wasn't her personal chauffeur.

The last thing she would expect to hear from him was, "I'll drive you back to Cheshire."

"What?" She raised an eyebrow at the man and he supposed she thought he was only kidding. He definitely wasn't. "It's a four-hour drive, H."

"Then we should leave now." He pressed his lips into a small smile, and her heart suddenly forgot how to beat.

She didn't know why he was doing all of that for her. She just asked for a small favor which he could have easily declined, still, he volunteered to drive nearly 200 miles so she could visit her mother's grave. She honestly didn't get it but she didn't want to ask him why.

"Thank you so much," she said. "I owe you this once."

"Wait, but..."

"But what?" Y/N had already climbed down a couple stairs when she stopped to look back at him.

"We should put the melting ice cream in the fridge." He nodded towards the door, making her smile.

It was actually the first smile he'd received from his Bambi after two weeks away from her and Harry couldn't put into words how glad he was to see it again. He knew they still had a lot of catching up to do. But he had a whole four hours in the car to worry about that. Right now, he let himself be happy.

The drive was long but neither of them was tired. Harry and Y/N blasted music in their car while driving away from the big city, singing songs they didn't know all the words to at the top of their lungs with the windows down and wind in their hair. Harry couldn't recall the last time he'd felt this free. He didn't have to worry about all the responsibilities waiting for him in London, nor think about how his manager would react when he found out Harry had rescheduled another interview for personal reasons. At that moment, in his car driving down the empty country road, it was just him and her and no one else.

When the music had become louder than their own voices, Harry stole a quick glance at the girl sitting by his side. She was too distracted by the beautiful sunset to continue singing or even catch his eyes on her.

"Watch out!"

Harry steered the wheel just in time to dodge the massive hole on the road. The car bounced ahead pretty hard, causing him to grip onto the wheels and her to scream out loud. Fortunately, both were safe as was the car but his heart was still beating out of control. When he turned to give her an apologetic grin, she smacked him right on the arm, telling him to be careful or else they would be dead before they even reached the graveyard. That threat really had the 24-year-old rooted to his seat. Maybe from now on, he should keep his eyes on the road instead of her.

When they arrived at Graceland Cemetery in Holmes Chapel, the sky was already pitch dark. Under the pale moonlight, the iron front gate looked exactly like one of those gateways to hell in the horror films she was obsessed with but he loathed deeply. He walked closer to her, one arm hugging the bouquet of lilies to his chest, the other gripping onto her arm as they passed many headstones laying all out of order on the muddy ground. It took them five minutes or so to get to where Y/N's mother was laid.

The girl kneeled down on the sew grass without minding the soil would ruin her beautiful white dress. She burnt three jasmine scented candles on the ground after laying the lilies down by her mother's grave.

"Happy birthday, mum," she mumbled, smiling at the grey stone with her mother's name on it. "I love and miss you very much, and I'm so sorry that I'm late today."

Watching her from the side made Harry feel like he was intruding the special mother-daughter moment and he intended to walk away. But all it took was one sound of his name from her lips and Harry's feet immediately grew roots into the ground.

"Harry is with me. He drove me all the way here from London so I could see you." With a faint smile, she turned to him. "Don't worry. He takes very good care of me."

The green-eyed man could hear his heartbeats echoing in his ear as all the hair on his arms stood to attention. He didn't know whether it was because of the cool April breezes blowing through his thin jacket, or the fact that they were in the middle of a graveyard, or the lovely hue in her sparkling eyes as they were gazing at him. What he did knew was in that very moment she might also feel the same, maybe a little if not entirely. And that was all it mattered.

"Since we're already here, do you wanna stop by to say hello to Anne?"

"My mum's on vacation actually. There's nobody home," Harry said as he made his way to Y/N, standing with his back against the car like she was as they both looked up at the magnificent view above their heads, a sky full of stars.

The sight was almost surreal, like the whole world had been covered in black velvet with little diamonds strung up as decorations. For too long Harry had been living in the big city where all the best views were hidden behind skyscrapers, and the busy lives on the ground didn't allow him to look up, not even once. Now in an open field with just them two and the sound of crickets chirping in fading moonlight, he could finally feel alive.

"You don't get to see this in London, right?" She said as both of them turned to look at each other at the same time.

"I think I've missed out on a lot of things since I left this town," he said, almost as a soft whisper for only them to hear. The stars were mirrored in her crystal clear eyes like little shiny specks of magic dust. The sight of it reminded him of the lake behind his high school on a summer night, when it looked like the water had captured the moon and all the stars. To him, Y/N was no different from that summer late. She carried the entire universe in those eyes.

"Harry," her voice, with the help of a cold breeze, soon dragged him back to reality. She was still looking at him and her expression was unreadable as she questioned, "have you ever considered talking Anne into selling that house?"

"No. She loves that place too much," he said. "Gemma and I don't wanna sell it either."

There was a pause.

"Thank you," she finally said, giving him another smile and looking up again.

Harry knew she meant to ask about their treehouse. She wanted to know if he'd ever thought about selling away one of the few things that were proof of what they used to have. Then she thanked him because he hadn't. Somewhere deep inside he felt joy because now he knew she still looked back to those days to the kids they once were. Maybe the part of him inside of her had never really faded away.

"Do you wanna stop by our treehouse?" He asked all of a sudden and he could tell from her reaction that she was taken aback.

"No, thanks." Y/N shook her head. "I might run into those two."

"Your dad and Marcy."

She confirmed with a sigh, puckering up her lips.

"I got their wedding invitation last week," he said, smiling at her but she was far from happy to hear that.

"I did too, but it's now in the bin." She shrugged, eyes on the stars whereas he was still staring at her. "I'm not going to their wedding."

"Why?"

"Because that would make me feel like I'm betraying my mother."

"But that's your dad. He really wants you to show up."

"So? He's a shit dad anyway."

Harry knew it wasn't his business when he received that stubborn eye-roll from her. He understood that she had every single right to hate that man for all he had done to her and her mother. But Harry cared about Y/N too much to let her keep tormenting herself and her father this way.

"Look, kid, I know he's shit at being a dad but...at least...he's still trying to be one."

That sentence made Y/N turn her head to face him once again. It had been too long, yet she could still remember the photo he had kept in his bedroom. The only photo of the man she had never seen before.

When nine-year-old Y/N asked him who it was, thirteen-year-old Harry hesitated for a little while before telling her it was his father. Before then she had assumed that every dad had to either live with their children, or come visit them once in a while like Celine’s dad. But from Harry's story, she learned that not every father wanted to be close to their kids and watch them grow. Harry's father had left his family since Harry was still too young to remember. Just like Y/N, he had never met the man. His mother had thrown away everything that belonged to his father, except for that one photo the little boy found in the attic and decided to keep as a secret. He had never shown it to anyone but the little girl next door.

Eyes still on her, Harry took a deep breath and squeezed the hand she put on her knee. "You don't have to forgive everything he's done but please don't cut him off for good. At least show up at his wedding."

"I can't do it alone." She shook her head fast and lowered it so she could stare at her feet instead of him. "I couldn't even have dinner with them alone..."

"Then I'll go with you. Sounds good?" He titled his head to read her face, squeezing the girl's hand a little bit tighter to remind her that he was there for her.

And after a moment of thinking, she finally answered, "I'll think about it and...let you know."

It was nearly 8PM when Harry and Y/N got back into their car to head back to London. The drive home was rather silent since both of them had been exhausted and it was getting late. They put on some slow songs and drove through the night with eyes kept away from each other. The scent of candle wax mixed with fresh soil still remained on her clothes. It smelt rather delicate, reminding him of a garden full of jasmines, and he loved it just as much as he knew she did.

"Where have you been?" She finally asked, breaking the comfortable silence between them both.

"Where have I been?"

"In the last two weeks. What? You have a tendency of ghosting on the people in your life once in a while?"

The people in his life, he knew she meant her and Isaac. He couldn't straight off tell her that he'd only been avoiding them while keeping contact with everyone else in his life. She wouldn't understand and hate him as much as she had before.

So he told her he'd been busy getting ready for a new role for a movie which started shooting in the summer. It was also the truth, well, half of it. He'd left out the part about him trying to figure out what he wanted and what he was willing to give up in order to be happy. By the end, he'd realized that he missed her too much to be able to stay away from her life and still feel joy at the same time. He'd done it before, living six years without knowing where or how she was. But now that she had come back, he must admit that it was a struggle trying not to think about her every second of the day.

"Don't worry. I won't disappear like that again," he said.

She didn't reply and he didn't hope that she would believe him. He could always show her that he was sincere.

Harry parked his car outside her building and they both got out at the same time. He was slightly disappointed because he wanted to open the car door for her like they did in those romantic films. But then again he remembered, his Bambi was never one of those cliché leading girls.

Before he could open his mouth to say goodnight and goodbye, Y/N pulled him into a sudden hug and thanked him for everything he'd done for her that day.

"Do you want to come in?" She asked, to his surprise. "There's ice cream in the fridge."

Her offer made him smile.

"I would love to," he said and for sure meant it. "But I can't. I've got dinner with Niall."

"Dinner at midnight?"

"That restaurant opens until 3AM." He shrugged, checking his watch. "But...I'm kind of an hour late now."

"Oh, okay. See you another time then?"

"Sure." He stroked her tangled hair and pressed his lips to her forehead as he wished her goodnight. When they parted, he felt strangely incomplete even though she wasn't even out of sight. Harry now began to think he had turned into one of those clingy high school boys who couldn't stop missing his secret crush, and the fact that he had just implied that she was his secret crush was already too embarrassing. He had no control of whatever going on inside his brain anymore, and he felt like it should be a bad thing.

"What are you doing next Friday night?" He shouted out the question, making the girl turn around just as she reached the glass doors.

"Uh...Probably studying for my finals. Why?"

"You stay at home and study on your birthday?" The amusement in that question of his had her eyes widened and her jaw fell open. That was when the man realized she had not only forgotten her mother's birthday, but also her own.

"Right." She squeezed her eyes shut and clenched her fists. "Now that I remember. I do have plans on that night."

"Oh...With Isaac?"

"Yeah." She nodded.

Even though he had already seen it coming and received that apologetic look from her, Harry still felt like crap. He told her it was no big deal as he got back into his car and started the engine. They waved at each other one last time before he departed. This time, the girl stayed exactly where she was, watching his car until it blended into the moving traffic on the busy avenue.

"Sorry, I'm late!"

"Aren't you always?"

Niall blew up his cheeks as he closed the menu in his hand, dark blue eyes narrowed at Harry, who was still trying to catch his breath as he told the waiter to get him whatever his friend had already ordered.

"And two glasses of Cheval Blanc 2010," he quickly added, with a smile.

"We only sell that by the bottle, sir."

"Bring me a bottle then."

"Wait." Niall held up a hand just as the waiter turned away. "He'll have a glass of water."

"A glass of water?" The actor snorted.

Niall Horan was the least serious person he'd ever known but this time the guy wasn't joking. The singer nodded his head, telling the waiter to leave them and intertwined his fingers on the table, intense eyes staring his best friend down.

"You can't show up here drunk and order a whole bottle of wine, Harold."

"I'm not drunk."

"Then why's your face red and why do you keep smiling like an idiot?"

That one simple question got Harry tongue-tied. He thought he might know the answer. But he couldn't even say it to himself let alone to his best friend who couldn't even keep a secret for longer than a day. Of course, he loved Niall with all his heart and would do anything for that man had he asked just once. But there was a good reason he would always confide in Isaac and had to think twice before confessing something to his other best friend.

"Are you sure you're sober, Harold?" Niall asked, probably still suspecting Harry was lying to him

"I am. Absolutely!"

"Good. I don't wanna see you as that drunk mess when the witch left again."

Niall paused as soon as he realized what he had just said, slowly lifting his eyes to check his best friend's reaction. Despite not mentioning any name, he knew Harry could already tell whom he was referring to. Of course, Niall didn't mean to bring her up at a happy dinner like this, it just slipped out by accident. Now he felt so bad about it.

Harry hadn't thought about Ruby for weeks now. He'd blocked her number and he couldn't even remember the last time he'd checked social media to see what she had been up to. Ever since the BAFTAs, the name Ruby Ellis had completely vanished from his mind. But Niall accidentally bringing her up tonight was almost like opening up an old wound.

Harry didn't know how to describe his relationship with Ruby, if it was ever a relationship. But his feelings for her had been real. His pain, his jealousy, his tears, his nightmares, all of them had been real. He couldn't even describe the post-goodbye since it had been the worst six months of his entire life. He would wake up in the middle of the night screaming her name and reaching out to search for her figure only to hold onto air on the empty side of his bed. What he and Ruby had together was heaven and hell at the same time. So when he'd escaped from the maze that was her heart, and finally looked back from an outsider's point of view, he realized how wrong she had been for him, how much she had damaged him, physically and emotionally.

But he had loved her. He really had loved her. So much to the point even now if he was walking down the street, he would turn his head the second he smelt her favorite perfume on a stranger. However, some people were only meant to stay in your memory and not in your heart or your arms, and Harry had to learn it the hardest way in order to let her go.

"Don't worry. I'm not going back there again," he said, giving his best friend a reassuring smile.

"I believe in you." Niall reached out to hold his wrist. "She taught you to smoke and you quitted. Now you could quit her."

That sounded so sad, yet so true.

His ex-lover was nothing more than a bad habit.

The mood at the two gentlemen's table was lifted once again when the waiter from earlier returned with their food and two crystal glasses of mineral water. Niall had quite a passion for food as he did for music, so the look on his face when he saw the steaming dishes laid down in front of his eyes made Harry dissolve into laughter.

"I'm gonna take a photo for Isey," said the singer as he unlocked out his phone and rose from his chair to find a good angle for the shot.

"Why isn't he here though?" Harry asked. "Is he busy?"

"What are you talking about? He's in Rome right now. Didn't he tell you?"

"He's on vacation?"

"More like workation." Niall sat back down, rolling his eyes and put his phone away to grab the napkin. "You should try the fish, Harry. It's marvelous."

"Niall, what do you mean?" Harry honestly couldn't concentrate on eating at the moment to even think about how marvelous the fish was. "He's working in Italy? For how long?"

"At least six months or more. I don't know."

"Six months? But Y/N's birthday is next week."

"Who's Y/N?"

Harry sighed in frustration as he corrected himself, "Bambi."

"Oh, right! The Bambi/Smiley girl." Niall chuckled, shaking his head. "Isey asked her to be his girlfriend last week, but at that point, he still hadn't received the offer to shoot for Vogue Italy. Somehow Smiley...I mean Bambi found out about it so she turned him down. Isey was really sad so he flew off to Rome without telling anyone, and I just found out last night when I asked him to come with us. I assumed you'd already known because he always told you everything."

As Niall went on with his speculations about how Y/N had discovered the Vogue thing, Harry could only try to make sense why she'd lied to him that she had birthday plans with Isaac, knowing the guy was in Rome. Maybe she didn't want Harry to feel pity for her, maybe she just wanted to be alone, or maybe she thought he had done too much for her and didn't want him to show up at her door with a teddy bear and pink balloons with her initial on them. Anyway, her two best friends were in Boston and she obviously wouldn't come home for dinner with her dad and his new woman. So he couldn't let her celebrate her 20th birthday with a stack of books and way too much caffeine. Harry had missed many of her birthdays already and that was entirely his fault. But this time he had to do things differently.

"Niall." He calmly looked at his friend who had already finished half of the fish. "Do you happen to know any stargazing spot in London?"

#harry styles #my girl series #actor!harry #older!harry #bestfriend!harry #harry styles writing #harry styles series #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfics #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfictions #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #harry styles smut

733 notes · View notes

averageficenjoyer · 5 years

Text

“Horizon”

Genre: Smut Pairing: I.M x female Reader Summary: “Never know, you should never know what did I done today and how was it, yeah I could imagine your complication when I spit confess about the daily shit, yeah Ain't got time to spend useless things just work it I got time for ya hug me and lay me down, baby, I'll wet that” Basically this is a scenario inspired by I.M’s new mixtape “Horizon”, highly recommended as BGM for this writing! Warning: um??? Long introduction I guess??? Lol + some swear words When Changkyun came back from world tour, he missed so many things - his bed, korean food, his friends, his parents, but most importantly, he missed you. He missed you so much, texting and facetiming you pretty much everyday between concerts, naps and flights. You missed him probably even more, your nights cold and lonely without him by his side, your mornings and evenings empty without anyone to speak to. He knew you suffered a lot, so he decided to make it up to you. He made a “little” surprise for you and booked two weeks holiday abroad on a not so popular island to make sure you could have more privacy and just focus on each other. It was perfect. Just you, your boyfriend Changkyun, golden beach full of fine soft sand and warm azure sea sparkling under enormous hot sun. No rushing, no worrying about paparazzis, no schedule – just being together and having peaceful, lazy and fun days and nights. It could sounnd boring for some people, but for you just being able to stroll around all day while holding hands, playing in water, sunbathing and enjoying each other's presence was priceless.- How did you even find this place? It's literally heaven - you asked one day, sitting together with him on a beach after a refreshing plunge in the sea, looking at the mesmerising sunshine, your head on his shoulder, your bodies still glistering with water droplets- Well, celebrities usually try to get out of the public during vacation, so they know some pretty much deserted locations to just unwind without worrying about paparazzi or intrusive fans, so I just asked here and there. You know, your man has connections – he said simply and winked at you, making you giggle. - Yeah, I know you know a lot of people, Mr. Worldwide – you joked, nudging him gently with your elbow. - Yeah, but they all are nothing compared to you – Changkyun said without hesitation and moved his head closer to yours. You smiled slightly and and looked into his eyes. They were dark and sparkly, looking at you with so much love and adoration that words couldn't even describe. You were the luckiest person alive to have him as a boyfriend, he was more than you could ever ask for. You both leaned for a kiss when Changkyun's phone started ringing. He grunted, slightly annoyed. - I'm sorry – he sighed and picked up the phone – Hallo? What happened, manager? - he looked at you apologetically and stood up to come back to a tiny house nearby he rented for both of you for the vacation. You were left alone on a beach towel. You held its edge and started rumpling it, hoping the phone call from your man's company wouldn't come with any bad news, but when Changkyun didn't come back after a few awfully long minutes, you stood up and started walking on a seaboard, still keeping an eye on your lovely cottage in case Changkyun would go out to you. *Meanwhile* Changkyun's grip on a phone got tighter and tighter with every manager's word.

- You MUST come back the day after tomorrow – he said seriously – We got an invitation from on of the biggest TV stations in the US, they want to make a few interviews with us. - They are just interviews, we probably won't even be able to meet with monbebe. We can do it as well through facetime – he said as calmly as he could. - But they want you to sing and dance on a few broadcasts as well. It'll help with getting more recognition to the whole group. - We've already have enough recognition, we sold out our tour a few months ago, remember? Maybe let's focus on existing fans by providing bigger venues or more stops? - he couldn't help sounding petty.- The more fans you have, the more successful you are. And I'm sure you want to be successful, don't you? Also you're not the only one, what about the rest of members? Will you let them go to the US on their own, without you? They can't even speak English- Then maybe invest into interpreter, it's not my job – he growled.- Changkyun! Don't fuss around, just come for a few days and after that everyone has a monthly break- What are you talking about? We were supposed to practice for the next comeback after those 2-week vacation, most of the album is already done – he spat out, his blood boiling with anger.- Oh whatever, you're coming with us and don't even try to argue with me, I'm booking a flight ticket for you. The younger man took a deep breath, trying to keep himself together:- Everyone needs proper rest after such a long tour. I still have severe jet lag. I'm not going anywhere. Tell them I have family issues, I'm sick or whatever. And fucking do your job and hire an interpreter – his voice scary and even lower than usual. He hung up, not waiting fot the answer, turned off his phone and laid down on a couch in a living room. He was upset. Furious. Hurt. He didn't ask for much, did he? He always gives his 200% for Monbebe and Monsta X, they kept going so hard with korean comeback, then japanese one and then a whole world tour on 5 continents. They wrapped it up well without anyone getting injuried. It's amazing, isn't it? Everyone worked so hard, not only him, but all MX and staff members, they deserved some rest. Were a few interviews with uninformed TV hosts and journalists worth their precious time, worth flying to the US again, getting even more severe jet lag and probably having a few embarrassing situations with interviewers mispronouncing their group names or not distinguishing one member from another? But what about the members? They are surely tired as well. But they don't have lovers who were waiting for them for so long... But they have other people who they care about. Jooheon kept facetiming his kitties pretty much everyday, Minhyuk hept talking how he'd take his younger brother on a trip because they didn't have time to spend time together after Minhyuk's brother came back from army, Shownu missed his mum's cooking a lot... They'd understand... Wouldn't they? Was he being selfish? - Changkyunnie? - your soft voice snapped him back to the reality. He sat up and looked at you. You were standing in a doorframe in nothing but your blue swimming suit, your hair still a bit wet and messy from the sea water, last rays of sunshine peeking through clouds on a sky behind you, your body surrounded with purple-and-pink gleam from the light outside. You were beautiful. No, not beautiful. Mesmerising. Ethereal. Dazzling. You were Changkyun's. You were his everything. Your boyfriend stood up and slowly approached you, his eyes never leaving yours. - Changkyun? What happened? - you couldn't help but started worrying, seeing his serious expression and not hearing a word from him. He didn't answer. He just stood in front of you, his hand reaching a strand of your wet hair and tugging it behind your ear. - Nothing. Just... you are so breath-taking – he dinally spoke, his soft voice and smile waking up butterflies in your stomach – Just... just let me hug you – he didn't wait for you answer and just embraced you, nuzzling his face into a crook of your neck. - Kyun... I see something is wrong. You can tell me everything - you wrapped you hands around his torso and stroked his back gently. - It doesn't matter right now, really. You matter – he murmured, kissing your collarbone gently. You couldn't help but shiver. His lips always did magic to your body no matter if it was just an innocent peck or a hot long french kiss. Changkyun knew that too well, so he countinued peppering a trail of kisses up to your face, your skin smelling like sun and sea. When his mouth reached your jawline, he left a few kisses on it, reaching to your ear. - Just let me love you as much as I really do – he whispered, his low tone making the ends of your hair stand up. The next thing you felt was his lips connecting with yours. You closed your eyes and melted in a kiss immediately, encircling his neck with your arms. You stood like that for a while, your lips dancing together, tasting each other slowly. When you felt Changkyun's tongue in your mouth, his palms started playing with the hem of your swimming suit's top. You murmured and opened your mouth wider to let him taste you better. He murmured and took a chance, deepening a kiss. He tried to dominate you, but you liked being a bit playful so you didn't give up that easily, sucking lightly on his lower lip and grabbing his arm to stand more stably. Yet you couldn't help but gasp when his fingers wandered on your clothed nipples and teased them, making them hard - Oh, are you cold? Should I make you warmer? - he chuckled, satisfied with your reaction, and took off your top - I think it'll just make me colder – you joked, trying to still look cool. - Be patient, babe – he parted your lips and picked you up bridal style, carrying you to your bedroom bathed in pink glow coming from the sunrise. He laid you down on a bed, climbed on top of you and took one of your nipples in his mouth, his hand playing with your other breast, his eyes never leaving yours. You whimpered, arching your back to be even closer to his heavenly lips. Your breath became uneven, mixing with your soft moans you couldn't stop because of Changkyun's bulge rubbing your croth slowly. - Kyun... Please... - you bit your lip.- Please what? - he asked playfully, switching sides on your breasts. - Please... J-Just take me already... - you stuttered, a soft shade of red attacking your cheeks. - I thought I was supposed to make you hotter tho? - he raised his eyebrow, grinding on you with a bit more force. - I'm hot. I'm really hot... Just.. do it already – you whined, grinding back on him to get any bit of friction.- Calm down, you'll get what you want in a minute – he smiled, left a hickey between your breasts and started leaving wet kisses down your stomach till he reached your swimsuit bottom. He slid it down your legs in an agonazingly slow motion, but when he spreaded your legs and dived in between them, you squealed at the sudden sensation.- Looks like you're not only hot, but also wet, hm? - he smiled at you cockily and sucked on your clit, tasting all your juices. You moaned loudly and tangled your fingers in his soft ash grey hair, messing them completely but both of you couldn't care less. You closed your ever, feeling every little move of Changkyun's skilled mouth on your clit even more intensily. One moment his tongue was gentle and soft, massaging softly every bit of your bundle of nerves just to suck harshly on your clit, his whole mouth tightly wrapped around it. - Changkyun... Stop... I'll cum... - you panted out because you didn't want to finish that early.- That's good, isn't it? - he purred, sliding two fingers into your wet entrance. - Kyun! - you whined, but your body reacted quicker and your hips just started grinding on his palm, his lips leaving hot moist french kisses on your button and before you realised, a wave of undescribable pleasure hit you strongly, making you scream and pull harshly your boyfriend's hair. Your grip loosened as you relaxed, your clit still sensitive while Changkyun was licking off all the juices left. When he finished, he took off his swim trunks, which was his only piece of clothing and climbed on top of you again. - I love the way you smell... the way you taste... the way I make you wet so easily... - he whispered, kissing your collarbones, his crotch rubbing gently on yours – And the way you make me wet – he purred, feeling you getting wet again on his member. He knew how to make you both shy and horny at the same time. You reciprocated his moves and took his face in your hands to kiss him passionately. He kissed you back, panting gently in your mouth as he was grinding a bit more intensily. - Please... I need you – you sighed, tangling your legs around his hips and pulling him closer. - Oh really? Where? - he mumbled, still trying to be a tease even though you could feel he was rock hard. - Here – you said, grabbing his penis and positioning him right in front of your entrance and you moved your hips, finally taking him in. - Fuck, baby... - he whimpered, sliding into you slowly – Yes baby... Take it... Go take it baby... You're taking me so well – he raised to a kneeling position to have a better view on your entrance. He slowly slid in till the very and and then slowly slid out almost completely, watching your pussy taking him all so smoothly almost hypnotised by the view. He slowly sped up the pace, switching his eyes to your face. You were messy. Small droplets of sweat started forming on your forehead, your hair sticking to it. Your eyes half open, moans escaping your lips red from intense kissing and sucking. - You're... So... Beautiful... - he panted with every thrust, one stronger than another – So... Damn... Beautiful... His praises made you even wetter and you just moved your hips more force just to reach the climax you both desperately were looking for. He looked so damn sexy with sweaty body in front of you, his slightly toned torso still glistering in last purple bits of the light of the day, his soft grunts matching your louder and louder whimpers as he kept thrusting his hips faster and faster, his grip strong but not harmful on your thighs. - Fuck, Changkyun! - you cried out when he hit your G spot. He immediately spread your legs even wider to allow himself a better angle. - Come on, baby... Come for me... You're doing so well... Come on, beautiful, come for me – he growled, his one hand on your clit, his fingers massaging it quickly. - Fuck yes! Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, Kyun! - you screamed, reaching your climax. You clenched around his member, giving him sudden orgasm a second later, his cum filling you and intensifying your sensation. He slid out of you and collapsed next to you, panting heavily. You laid like that for a while, trying to draw breath and gain some strength back. - I love you – he murmured finally, kissing your shoulder gently. - I know... I love you too – you turned your head to look at him and you exchanged tired but honest smiles. He wrapped his arm around your waist gently: - Do you know you're beautiful then? - he grinned, moving closer to you. - No, but I know you're cheesy – you chuckled. - Sometimes I am. But I really mean it. I really do – he took a few strands of hair out of your face and put his hand back on your waist. You could feel blushing again. - I love you – you faced him and snuggled into his bare chest. - Thank you. I really do. I love you too – he kissed the top of your head and you both closed eyes, slowly falling asleep.

Since it’s my first smut here, I’d be happy to hear your feedback ^^ <3 Hope the scenario did its duty lol

129 notes · View notes

albumtalks · 4 years

Text

Review: Pyrrhic Defeat – In Audentia, Arx

Artist: Pyrrhic Defeat Album: In Audentia, Arx Release: Oct 18, 2019 Label: Winter of Our Discontent Records Genre: Progressive Death Metal/Black Metal Length: 58:08 Track Listing:

Abuse of the Kardashev Scale (7:31)

The Pen of Damocles (3:37)

Asylum in Audacity (10:18)

Loxodrome (5:35)

The Futility of Dinosaurian Existence (8:31)

Antepenultimate (7:12)

5700 Angstroms (3:19)

A Forest of Mighty Oaks Planted 200 Years Ago for Ships That Were Never Built (12:05)

I’ll admit it, I’m a sucker for odd time signatures. We didn’t get much into them when I was in high school, but we did have more of a foray into them than, I gather, most schools—sure, we played the staples such as a jazz-band arrangement of Dave Brubeck’s “Take Five” or the theme to Mission: Impossible composed by Lalo Schifrin, but we also did a few one-shots: Jay Bocook’s “At Dawn they Slept” had a single measure of 7/8 in it, and the time-signature changes in “The Gathering of the Ranks at Hebron”, composed by David Hol, were, I’m sure, a source of much dismay to the other students (and, if I’m being honest, to me as well). Pyrrhic Defeat’s debut album—Exceptionless Victory—had no shortage of them. Have no fear, because their sophomore outing, In Audentia, Arx, also shows no lack of odd-time segments.

I can’t wax on about the merits of unconventional meters in Western music for too long a time, however, and you won’t be able to judge the actual artistic merits of the album if I do. So what does In Audentia, Arx deliver in terms of a listening experience? Does it live up to its title (Latin for “in audacity, refuge”—I sense that the band enjoys TV Tropes)? The sixty-four-kilodollar question: Is it worth it?

I think so.

One thing that will immediately be clear to those familiar with Exceptionless Victory is the recording quality. In Audentia, Arx dips its feet into the deliberate lo-fi crappiness of the black metal scene, but it does so judiciously. That is to say, it’s clear it’s an artistic choice and it’s not an all-pervading schema; it doesn’t sound like they recorded the album on a boom box of 1990s vintage, but there is some grittiness there linking them to the metal underground whence they bubbled up. There’s that definite “like Between the Buried and Me but harder” vibe that defined Exceptionless Victory, but it feels like a natural evolution.

Abuse of the Kardashev Scale begins with what I think is an odd choice, befitting the album title: It fades in over a period of about forty seconds. As befits the title, which…well…refers to the Kardashev Scale, there’s definite sci-fi underpinnings running through this track. Dahlquist’s viola work is at peak performance here, and I believe there’s some passages where they used a Mellotron. At its core, though, it’s a thoroughly progressive (I think I counted 47 time signature changes) and facially-obviously metal track. For fans of Between the Buried and Me, think The Parallax II: Future Sequence mixed with the unchecked intensity of Alaska.

I think the turn of phrase that is the title of The Pen of Damocles is utterly brilliant. For those who don’t know, in classical mythology, Damocles was a king who sat on a throne above which was suspended a sword on a fraying rope that threatened to snap and drop on him at any minute (cf. Shakespeare’s “heavy lies the head that wears the crown”). This song had more of a punk or thrash feel to it, not that that’s a bad thing—it had me thinking of a heavier, more raw version of Boris.

I don’t know if you can call this an “eponymous” or “titular” track or not, but Asylum in Audacity is as haunting as it is technically skilled. It sounds like they took avant-garde jazz harmonization theory and actually made it melodious, though how they did that on the fly is anyone’s guess.

The one song I’m ambivalent about on this album is Loxodrome. It feels like a significant misfire—the pieces are all there, but someone skipped a section of the enclosed instruction book and the thing that got put together is lopsided and can’t stand up. I think a big part of this is an overuse of the Mellotron; its notes saturate the track. It’s interesting, and I guess you could say I don’t outright despise it, but maybe the best way to think of it is a failed experiment that the scientists decided to publish anyway.

If you want to get depressed about everything, spend five minutes on Twitter. If you don’t have Twitter, The Futility of Dinosaurian Existence is the next-best thing. It’s mostly a plodding, brooding song, notably at a significantly lower tempo than the rest of the album for most of its runtime, not quite to doom levels of Sunn O))) or even Candlemass, but not groovy enough to qualify as sludge à la, say, Sleep. It is nonetheless enjoyable, and I found it a nice palate-cleanser from Loxodrome. The lyrics were written when Brubaker was in the middle of a major depressive episode; in an interview somewhere on YouTube he said his psychiatrist told him to write a poem expressing how he felt and that ended up becoming the first quarter of the song.

And then we come to the third-to-last song on the album. (Its title literally means “third-to-last”; Pyrrhic Defeat like to flex on non-Latin speakers, apparently. Who knew?) If Loxodrome was a failed experiment, on Antepenultimate they got the formula right. It’s largely driven by Dahlquist’s viola and the Mellotron and actually has some flavors reminiscent of The Knife in conjunction with Planningtorock, of all things. They seem to have found the recipe for the secret sauce.

5700 Angstroms is short, sweet (inasmuch as you can call anything on this album “sweet”), and to the point. It’s got an industrial streak in it that would make Nine Inch Nails fans feel at home. It sounds like it was recorded live in the studio; there’s a few timing glitches and the audio quality is noticeably more lo-fi than on the rest of the album.

And then we get to A Forest of Mighty Oaks Planted 200 Years Ago for Ships That Were Never Built, the magnum opus of this work, whose name was taken from the former title of an Atlas Obscura article. If you like Blut Aus Nord or Cattle Decapitation—yes, those are…somewhat disparate, I am aware—you’ll enjoy this. Despite its runtime, it never feels like it drags or goes on too long; the headbanging musical phrases are all just the right length to not get stale and leave you wanting more, and the musicianship is in top form throughout. It’s definitely my favorite track on the album (and the best metal song name in years).

TL;DR – 10/10, 12/10 with rice.

— Galen B.

1 note · View note

bangtan-babe · 5 years

Text

i met you in the dark. 02

summary: Jungkook was rich and well dressed. The perfect target. But, everything changed once you decided to steal from him. And you’re beginning to find out he’s not exactly who you think he is.

pairing.: jungkook/reader also namjoon/reader

word count: 3.5k

genre: angst/ mystery/ drama/humor

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.

Chapter 2: Stolen Goods

The warm breeze hit your face and filled your lungs with air. As the bus went faster and the wind moved simultaneously, you closed your eyes. For a slight moment, regret rushed through and you wished things were different. The reality of almost getting caught, regardless of how small or large that chance was, left you feeling hopeless and slightly ashamed. A very rare feeling for you.

The “if onlys” started rushing in and they were inevitable to avoid. You wondered how different your life would have been if you weren’t alone from the start. Would things change if you had parents to support you? If you had a home you were comfortable in? If you had money and didn’t need to resort taking from others? The impending anxiety of these questions became too overwhelming so you forced your eyes open.

When the bus stopped, you strolled out slowly as a cloud of confusion and despair hovered over you. Usually, the walk to your apartment took about 5 minutes, but today you wanted to walk by the river. The calming nature of the water was definitely refreshing. However, it also left you feeling envious. A part of you longed for that comfort and calmness in your own life. As you walked by the edge of the river, you noticed people laughing, smiling...being happy.

But, it wasn’t long before the noise and laughter faded and the only thing you could hear was the sound of your own breath. It was heavy and fast, similar to the millions of thoughts that crossed your mind. As you tried to compose yourself and forget about the hotel, your eyes traveled to a couple sitting next to you on the grass. Their bright smiles were terrifying. How on Earth was it possible to be that happy? The thought lingered in your mind for a while before you turned your gaze away from them and pulled out your phone.

“Fuck it.” you muttered as you typed Seoul Park Hotel into Naver. You clicked their careers page and saw the receptionist position listed. The apply box was at the very bottom of the page. Apply. A simple yet devastating word. Part of you wanted to exit and forget about the job, but when the interaction with the girl replayed in your mind, you couldn’t help but feel infuriated.

Your rage fueled your desire to prove her wrong. In an instant, you attached your resume and clicked apply.

“Fuck.” There was no going back now, so you got up and went home.

Like usual your closet spaced apartment had no heat. There was also no point in calling your landlord because you knew he didn’t care at all. To begin with, your apartment wasn’t rentable. There was one sink that you used for connecting your showerhead and also washing your dishes. A living area which was also served as your bedroom. And a mini fridge next to a portable shelf filled with plates and packets of ramen. That was basically it. So, your apartment wasn’t actually an apartment and a human being couldn’t actually be happy living there. But you still felt blessed that you even had a place to sleep in, something that in the past wasn’t so easily available. This messed up blessing was all thanks to your grandma. She used to be neighbors with your landlord and asked him to let you stay here. Granted you did have to pay rent, but he reduced it tremendously because of her. Even though he should have regardless because this place was horrible. Nevertheless, you were thankful, you truly were. But with it still being cold outside and absolutely no heat in your apartment, it was hard to remain positive.

As you were about to get all bundled up in bed and call it a night, you suddenly remembered that you forgot to take the watch and wallet to the pawn shop. The watch was a good $200, which would cover your rent for the next 2 months. And the genuine leather wallet would be an additional $40-70. You checked the time on your phone and saw it was 8:13pm. The shop closed at 9pm. In about 30 seconds you grabbed all your stuff and bolted out the door.

“Hello,” you called out as you made your way into the pawn shop. The owner, who usually worked the front, wasn’t in today. In his place was a guy that looked about your age. He was wearing a baseball cap that hid most of his blonde hair and a simple white t-shirt. He replied with a hello but his gaze remained fixed on his phone.

“I’ve got some stuff,” you casually said as you dug into your backpack. Again, you noticed he wasn’t really paying attention.

“So where’s Mr. Kim?” you asked as you placed the wallet on the counter first and then the watch. He finally put his phone down and lifted his head up once he noticed the items in front of him.

“He had something to do,” the guy replied nonchalantly as he picked up the watch. To be honest, you were surprised by his deep voice. However, it wasn’t intense. It was soothing and calm.

After examining the watch he picked up the wallet. You were surprised when he started trying to grab something inside of it. “What’s this?” he asked curiously moving a key around in his hand.

Your eyes turned bloodshot. You completely forgot you had placed the key back in the wallet.

“Oh..um..sorry must have put my key in there by accident,” you tried to explain grabbing it from his hand.

He looked at your frantic expression for a few seconds before letting out a slight chuckle. “So...you put your key...inside of someone else's wallet..by accident?” he sounded out.

You were taken aback by his carefree inquiry. “Listen, I don’t know what you’re trying to say but that’s my wallet,” you tried to defend.

“Why would you be selling off your own wallet at a pawn shop?” he continued to question playfully.

“That’s none of your business,” you stated coldly. He didn’t say anything this time. Instead, he put down the wallet and picked up the gold watch. “Don’t tell me this is yours too?” he asked with a clear rhetorical tone to his voice.

You rolled your eyes in disbelief. But, just as you were about to respond, he cut you off. “It’s okay. I don't really care if these are yours or not” he stated all of a sudden. And for some strange reason, you believed him.

“Wonderful,” you said throwing a fake smile.

He went back to looking at the items now. “So $80 for the wallet and $300 for the watch,” he stated.

You were shocked because that was definitely more than you expected. Typically Mr. Kim gave you a low value, so this was surprising.

“Thank you,” was all you could say. He opened the cash register slowly, looking like he was thinking about something.

“I’m just curious-” he began. “-Why not just show this stuff off?”

His question was unanticipated so you didn’t reply right away.

“Because I need the money,” you finally said truthfully.

Now, he was the one who looked shocked. “Why do you look surprised?” you asked noticing his confusion. “You do work at a pawn shop. That’s kind of the whole point of this business.”

“I guess you’re right about that,” he chuckled.

As he gave you the money, a thought popped up in your mind and you had to ask him. “Would you?”

“Would I what?” he asked.

“Would you show this off?” you reiterated pointing to the watch and wallet.

He looked straight at you and you realized how intense his eyes were. They were dark and piercing for sure.... but definitely not empty. In a way, they made you feel comfortable.

He was now leaning slightly across the counter with his hands folded. “I think-” All of a sudden the door opened and a middle-aged woman walked in. He gave you a smile and lifted himself up. “Next time,” he said before greeting the women.

You put the money in your bag. “What makes you think there will be a next time?” you wondered.

“Something tells me you’ll be back,” he coyly said as if he knew the secret you were trying to hide.

-|-

It was 8 am and your phone starting ringing. In a groggy, half-asleep state you picked it up not knowing the number that was calling you.

“Hello?” you murmured.

“Hello, is this Ms.Y/LN?” the male voice on the other line asked.

“Yes. Who’s this??” you asked annoyed since it was so early in the morning. It better not be another spam call.

“I’m the manager at Seoul Park Hotel. We got your application a couple of days ago. Are you free anytime soon for an interview?” he explained.

You instantly shot out of bed. “Yes...Yes, I’m available. When can I come in?” you asked enthusiastically. This was completely surreal.

He paused. “Give me one second.”

You were left to your own thoughts until he returned. As you thought more about the conversation, you realized his voice was familiar. Then all of a sudden he came back on the phone and your thoughts diverged back to the present moment.

“Would it be possible to come in today at 11am?” the manager mentioned. His voice was definitely familiar.

It was such short notice, but you didn’t say anything. This was your one shot. “I’ll be there,” you confirmed.

“Great, see you then,” he stated.

You hung up the phone and ran to the bathroom to shower and get ready. The true challenge, however, would be figuring out what you were gonna wear.

As you scrimmaged through the pile of clothes across your bed, you realized that you had absolutely nothing except for jeans, hoodies, and t-shirts. But out of the corner of your eye, just as you were about to give up, you noticed a dress. It was the dress Grandma had gotten you after your first met her. It was your only option at this point.

It was a light blue wrap dress with pastel flowers, You had no idea what you were supposed to be wearing to these things, but anything was better than jeans and a hoodie.

Now the struggle was going to be finding shoes since you only owned sneakers. The cleanest shoes you found were a pair of black, slip-ons. You decided on those.

Even though spring had arrived, it was still cold out. You rummaged through your coats and found a leather jacket. It wasn’t entirely professional but at this point nothing you had on was. You put on the jacket, grabbed your bag, and headed out the door.

As you were about to walk down the stairs of the building, you stopped dead in your tracks. “Fuck my resume,” you remembered.

In the chaotic pursuit of figuring out your outfit, it completely slipped your mind that everything you had written on your resume was a lie. You checked the time on your phone..it was 9:30am. That meant you had about an hour left to memorize everything.

-|-

Scrolling through your phone, you re-read the fake resume a dozen times. You muttered all of the information to yourself hoping it would stick in your mind somehow.

“Okay, Sogang University. Management degree. Past Experiences include....” you were suddenly blanking on the experiences you listed. You glanced quickly at the document on your phone.

“So I worked at a department store. Managed a local restaurant, and did freelance work. Okay. Easy enough. I got this. Department store. Restaurant. Freelance.” you kept repeating those three words hoping that if you said them long enough they would become part of you.

The bus stopped and in a frantic state, you looked out the window. You ran out, realizing this was your stop. When you looked at your phone you saw one hour had already passed.

Seol Park Hotel was in one of the most reputable areas in Seoul. As you walked down the street, you noticed elegantly dressed and seemingly pretentious rich people. They were all carrying their designer bags and wearing their expensive jewelry so carelessly. It would be so easy to pickpocket them. But, you tried to bury that inclination and instead walked past them normally.

“Wouldn’t even have anywhere to hide it,” you thought to yourself.

You were standing in front of the hotel now. When you looked up at the twenty-something floored glass building, there was a small part of you that didn’t want to go in. The paranoia of seeing the guy from the subway again began to set in. You stood outside for about 10 minutes before you noticed people staring strangely. Despite your hesitation, you buried your feelings and walked in.

As you got closer to the desk you saw the girl from last time there. “Great,” you gritted through your teeth.

“Hi, I’m here for an interview with the Manager,” you stated giving the fakest smile as you tried not to say anything too offensive.

“What’s your name?” she asked less than enthusiastically while avoiding any eye contact with you. It seemed this was her regular personality.

“Y/N.”

She typed away on her computer. “Okay, take the elevator to the 2nd floor and wait for the manager there,” she explained looking up at you. As she did that, her expression changed and her eyes widened.

“You-” she began to say. But before she could finish her sentence you walked away and made your way to the elevator.

In contrast to the extravagant lobby, the second floor was more simplistic and modern. You got out of the elevator and sat down on the couch that was positioned parallel to the windows. It looked like you were the only one on the floor.

You were beginning to feel anxious. It was five past 11 and the manager still wasn’t showing up. Giving in to your restlessness, you kept looking at your phone every few seconds trying to see how much time had passed. Then, as your eyes were glued on the time, a deep voice spoke in the distance, “Sorry I’m late.” You got up quickly, startled at the suddenness.

As you put your phone inside of your bag and looked up at the man, a rush of panic ran through your body. He also stopped cold, noticing you as well.

“Pawnshop?” you stuttered as the guy from the pawn shop stood in front of you. He looked surprised as well, but after a few seconds, he relaxed and walked over to you as he was doing beforehand.

“Well, this is a surprise,” he started laughing at the situation.

“Wait so you’re the manager?” you asked confused. “I thought you worked at the pawn shop.”

“I was covering for my father that day,” he explained nonchalantly.

Your eyes widened even more. “Your father? Wait, Mr. Kim is your father?” you asked in an even more confused state.

“He is,” he confirmed.

“Wow,” you said aloud, which led him to laugh slightly.

You noticed your dazed expression. “Sorry, this is just a strange coincidence,” you admitted.

“Not really. I told you I’d see you next time,” he replied with a hint of confidence in his voice. Your fingers curled at the cringy way it came out.

You forced a weak laugh. “Yeah...”

After a few seconds of silence, he spoke up. “Anyways let me formally introduce myself. I’m Kim Namjoon, the manager here at Seoul Park,” he stated extending out his hand. You bowed slightly and shook his hand. “Nice to meet you..again. I’m Y/N.”

“Alright Y/N, follow me and we’ll start the interview,” he stated turning slightly and pointing towards a door at the end of the hall. You nodded your head and followed him inside.

Once you were both sitting down, he opened a folder and pulled out your resume. Now you were nervous.

“You know I’m kind of surprised. I didn’t expect such a strong resume,” he mentioned looking over the piece of paper.

“Thank you, neither did I,” you stated jokingly, hoping he didn’t notice the sarcasm in your voice.

“Well, you should be proud. All of your experiences are perfect for this position,” he commented.

There was a slight pause. ”But to be honest, what really interested me was your experience with VIP customers at the department store,” he added reading from the resume.

You nodded your head in agreement, but internally you completely forgot that you had written that. “Yes, it was a very challenging and rewarding position. I learned a lot by working with VIP clients,” you lied.

He put the resume down. “Oh? Like what?” he questioned as he leaned back onto his chair.

You gripped onto your bag tightly and tried to think of something to say. “Um... I would probably say how to interact with VIP clients,”

But as that explanation came out, you noticed Namjoon didn’t look impressed. “And how to steal,” you nonchalantly announced. Instantly his head popped up. “What?” he blurted, worried by your answer.

“Not that kind of stealing,” you said laughing. “What I mean is that all VIP clients have money to spend. And at my last job, I learned how to give them what they wanted but also what they needed,” you tried to rephrase. But Namjoon looked completely lost.

“I stole their money by essentially making them spend their money on things they didn’t necessarily ask for,” you continued.

His demeanor changed and he looked more reserved. “And you don’t see anything wrong with that?”

As you thought about his question you weren’t sure if it was a trick or not. Were you supposed to say that there was something wrong?

You decided to go with your gut. “No, I don’t. Good customer service is recognizing what your client needs without them having to say it to you.”

His eyes lit up when you said that. Your gut was right.

“I agree,” Namjoon said giving you a slight smile. He opened his mouth to say something, but awkwardly paused and looked down at his desk.

“So I want to be completely transparent with you,” he finally said. “The position you applied for is a bit different from what the job posting actually mentioned online.” You quirked up your eyebrows in confusion.

“It is a receptionist position. But it would be for the VIP desk at this hotel. So you would be in charge of all VIP related activities,” he reassured noticing your perplexion.

You nodded your head slowly. “I see.”

“I’m sorry this wasn’t in the description. But it’s a discreet position because you’ll be having a lot of interaction with VIP clients. So we didn’t want just anyone to apply,” he tried to explain more sincerely.

“No, I understand. I’m fine with that,” you emphasized.

“Great! So we’ll contact you in a couple of days to let you know when to come in for your first shift. And you’ll get your schedule and everything else then.”

“Wait?..I got the job?” you questioned surprised. Namjoon nodded his head in response as he got up from his chair. You also got up.

“Wow..um thank you. I really appreciate this opportunity,” you stated fathomed at the situation.

“You deserve it,” he said. His words were sincere which made you feel very vulnerable somehow.

Namjoon followed you out of his office and pointed towards the elevators. “See you next time,” he added as you were about to walk off.

You smiled.

The elevator came and you got in completely overwhelmed. You lean your head against the wall. Somehow it was taking longer than normal to arrive at the lobby, so you lifted your head to check the box that read off the floor numbers. It was going up. When you checked the buttons, you realized that you had pressed the wrong floor number. The doors to floor 11 opened up and a man wearing all black walked in. He was also wearing a hat so you couldn't see his face properly. But by his muscular build, you expected his face to be attractive.

As you moved back to give yourself some space, your eyes traveled to the floor. That's when you noticed it. The gold ring.

A huge knot formed in your throat and your eyes unknowingly traveled to look at his face again. He stared back at you with a sinister look in his eyes that made you nauseous. Before you knew it, he grabbed a hold of your wrist and threw your arm up to his face.

“Where’s my stuff?!,” he spat through his clenched jaw.

35 notes · View notes