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the-hilda-librarians-wife · 1 year

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Inutilia Truncat

Pairing: Sketchbook (Kaisa/Johanna)

Summary: Inutilia truncat: one of the five latim mottos of the arcadist, or neoclassical movement. Literally translates to "cut out that which is not useful"

Kaisa is an English and History major in the University of Trolberg. Her biggest pride has always been excelling in everything she set herself to, at whatever cost. One of her seminars, however, has been a hinderance to her, leaving the girl with no choice but to swallow her pride and seek out the one person who seems to know what they're doing better than her.

Notes: YAAAAAAAY I'm posting again!! You guys, You've no idea how freaking happy I was when the idea for this fic struck me in like, late November (thanks to that flower anon, whose fic I still want to read :’)) and I was able to write again. I hope you enjoy this as much as I've been enjoying working on it

Also, amazing news!! For the first time ever, I have a beta reader! Huuuuge thank you to @waddles-ex-machina for not only letting me ramble to her about this verse, but also for proof reading this so kindly. You made the process of working on this fic even more fun <3

One last thing before I allow you to go on and read it, please be mindful that all of my knowledge on the inner workings of universities outside of my country comes from reading other college aus and watching Monster’s University. And that is *it*. So I am asking you to suspend your disbelief and focus on the gays instead of the logic

Read it on ao3

Kaisa barely refrained from snapping the pencil she was holding in two. It had happened again.

Of course, what she did instead was take a deep breath and swiftly wriggle her way out of the mass of students that were heading to the English department’s notice board. It wasn’t out of shame that she went away; regardless of not being in the top of that class, her score had been high enough to be proud of, even for her. Rather, it was because being in the middle of a crowd only ever made her feel uncomfortable, and because with her current state of nerves she wouldn’t put it past her to snap one of her classmates in half.

And it was all because of her.

Kaisa had spent her first two years in college delighting in the classes taught by professors who shared their scores publicly. Up until now, she had been consistently getting the highest grades out of everyone who took the same disciplines as her, acing every test and perfectly completing every assignment. Any voices who insisted that she hadn’t deserved her scholarship, that she wasn’t smart enough, that her getting upper education was a waste of time had either been silenced or become inaudible in the bubble of self satisfaction that Kaisa had painstakingly managed to submerge herself in.

That is, of course, until she signed up for the neoclassicism seminar this semester and had begun constantly getting lower grades than that damned Art History major. Kaisa had nothing against her, personally. Though the girl’s far-too-bright personality had startled her on their first day of class - nothing wrong with the greeting, Kaisa just wasn’t used to people on campus talking to her for no apparent reason, and really, why did this random student introduce herself to her on the first day completely out of the blue? - she hadn’t given much thought to her until the first grade came out on the History department’s notice board. Kaisa’s essay, which she had worked on through the night until it was flawless in her eyes, had still scored lower than that of the person she’d begun to think of as Golden Retriever Girl.

It wasn’t that Kaisa didn’t know her name. After so many graded assignments (and this professor in particular liked them a lot), she’d had enough chances to stare at Golden Retriever Girl’s name to memorise it five times over. And Johanna Magnolia Pearson would somehow, magically, inexplicably, always score higher than Kaisa.

Though the first few times it had happened Kaisa had only swallowed down her frustration and promised herself to work harder next time, it had become a bothersome pattern and something that was actually causing her irritation even when she wasn’t actively thinking about it. It was, therefore, something she had to fix immediately, because an irritated mind can’t focus, can’t be productive, and can only disappoint.

If she talked to Tildy, the woman who had been her mother for as long as her mind could remember, and the very reason she had been given a chance at university, she was sure she’d be dismissed as worrying over a non-issue, and be told she should be proud to be the second best student on the seminar. She couldn’t blame her for it; Tildy had been with her all the time, but she hadn’t lived her life. She couldn’t know what it was like to have to prove yourself all the time to the people around you.

So she couldn’t go to Tildy, which meant she had to solve it herself. And though she could try simply copying Golden Retriever Girl’s actions - sitting in the front seats, asking lots of questions and being extremely active in class discussions - that couldn’t possibly be where she was failing, since her trustworthy seat at the back corners and her strategy of silently observing and jotting down notes on her notebook had never failed her on any of her other disciplines. Neither did she think that muscling through this course even harder was the answer. If she pushed herself any harder, Kaisa was actually afraid she might faint, and that would definitely affect her efficiency.

Bracing herself for the task ahead, Kaisa balled her fists by her side and stiffly walked down the two flights of stairs that led to the courtyard, leaving the mass of desperate students behind her fighting to see their grades. If she wanted to talk to anyone else in her seminar, she’d simply wait for them by the notice board until they managed to get a glimpse at their score on their latest exam. But not Golden Retriever Girl. No, for some reason, she never stayed to look at the score sheet with all of their grades as soon as they were divulged like the rest of them, instead climbing down those stairs to head to places unknown after every single lecture. Not that Kaisa had been observing her. That would have been creepy.

The Humanities building, unlike the other ones in their university, was very quaint and old-styled, due to it having been the first to be built, shortly after the founding of Trolberg. Kaisa climbed down the stone stairs, and the tall ceilings made her steps echo. Autumn had barely begun, so it was still relatively warm outside and the inside was fresh without having to be cooled. The scent of grass became noticeable once the first flight was over, making Kaisa realise that she was probably going to enter the building’s gardens for the first time since she began studying there. She had known it was there, she could see it through the windows, but they didn’t lead anywhere in particular and she never had time to dedicate to admiring them, so it had simply slipped her mind to go meet the grounds.

She supposed that would change today.

The staircase ended in a corridor which had on its left side a wall filled with rows of classroom doors, and on the right a few columns for supporting the ceiling with stone benches between them. Students occupied some of those, reading or listening to music on their headphones or furiously typing away on their notebooks, but Kaisa did not recognize on any of them the head of auburn curls she was looking for.

The garden was beautiful, that was the first thing she noticed once she stepped outside into it. The grass was well kept and neat paths filled with gravel led to a fountain in the middle. The Humanities building surrounded it on all sides, making it a rectangular haven in the middle of it. But it was a contained, boring sort of beauty if you asked Kaisa. There were no butterflies or any other sort of more interesting animal in sight, the ground had been cleaned off of any typical autumn leaves, and its little flower beds certainly paled when compared to the wildflowers in Tildy’s yard.

But still, Kaisa supposed, it was nice. The little Tildy voice in her head told her to stop being such a grump, and she could see why people would like to spend their time there.

Following the gravel path in front of her with her gaze, she spotted the person she had been looking for right on the edge of the fountain, shoulders hunched forward and immersed in whatever it was that she was writing on the sketchbook she was holding. That’s what she couldn’t even wait until she saw the test’s results to do?, Kaisa thought bitterly.

She knew her bitterness wasn’t directed at miss Golden Retriever, though. It was at herself, for not doing better, and at the fact that someone was doing so well in their class seemingly without feeling like they were selling their soul to their studies like Kaisa did. So she bit down on her tongue, twisting her ring around her finger like she usually did when nervous or bored, and stepped onto the gravel, feeling and hearing it crunch under her boots with each step. This was the mature thing to do. Better to get it done already, quick, easy and (mostly) painless.

When Kaisa got close enough that her feet were noticeable in the girl’s field of vision, Johanna’s writing hand became still and she lifted her eyes to her, removing her earphones when she realised that the person she was seeing was coming in her direction, and honest to God smiling when she recognized who exactly that was. It wasn’t a wide, toothy grin but it felt just as bright, lifting the corner of her lips high and making the skin over her cheekbones flush only slightly. Kaisa wavered for a moment. After their first interaction, she hadn’t ever talked to that woman again. She had absolutely no business looking that happy to see her, and neither had her heart in doing such a stupid little somersault in the face of her smile.

“Hi!” Golden Retriever Girl greeted warmly. Kaisa was coming to wonder if that was the only way she knew how to do things.

“Hello.” Kaisa shifted her weight from one foot to the other, suddenly self-conscious and rethinking this whole interaction. Why had she thought this was a good idea? This was stupid. She was stupid. What was she doing, acting like her being the best student on campus was something that the universe owed to her? Was she really so immature? She should have taken this to therapy, for fuck’s sake, not to the classmate she had only ever exchanged five words with.

“Lovely day, isn’t it?” The golden retriever cut through her train of thought, bringing Kaisa back to the present and preventing her from spiralling further down. “I don’t usually see you around the gardens, though. What brings you here?”

Had Kaisa been a bit more grounded, she would have noticed the implicit ‘I pay attention to whether or not you’re around’ hidden in Johanna’s words. That not being the case, however, she was only able to notice (and be thoroughly confused at) how Johanna sat up straighter and tapped the place next to her on the fountain’s edge when she, with all the dignity she could muster, informed her that she had come looking for Johanna, actually.

“Well, it’s good to talk to you again, Kaisa!” Closer now that she had sat down besides her, Kaisa could see that Johanna looked like she truly meant it. Her smile hadn’t once left her face, and she had grown even more flushed. She wondered if maybe it was the heat, even though the sun was already setting and Johanna was sitting on a place which the building cast a shadow over. Even though it was not hot at all. “Forgive me, but what is it you study, again? You told me when we met, but I’m afraid I’ve forgotten.”

Kaisa had not, in fact, told her what she studied. When the Golden Retriever Girl had introduced herself on their first seminar, she had been too stunned that someone with so much energy was talking to her (or, even more pathetically, that anyone at all who didn’t want something from her was talking to her), that she hadn’t really aced that social interaction. She had said her name when asked (and was surprised to find out now that the girl remembered, even if she herself had memorized her full name), but when Johanna said she was an Arts History major, Kaisa herself had only said “cool” and continued to try and find a place in her used and almost-full textbook for that subject. Which, in hindsight, had probably been why Johanna had given up on trying to talk and had left to find her seat.

Why had Kaisa thought that this was a good idea, again?

“I’m on English and History.” She said, and Johanna let out an appreciative hum. It looked like Golden Retriever was about to try and begin to make small talk around that, but before she could Kaisa spoke up again. “This may seem a bit random, but I was wondering if you could help me.”

“Oh!” A glimpse of disappointment crossed Johanna’s eyes for just a second, and the left corner of her lip twitched just so, but Kaisa was completely unaware. “Of course. What can I do for you?”

As she asked it, Golden closed her sketchbook, and in doing so brought Kaisa’s attention to it. Now that she was closer, she could see for a split second that in it weren’t writings as she had thought, but drawings. She supposed that made sense, given the girl’s area of studies.

Kaisa didn’t feel the need to clarify which class it was that they took together, since Golden Retriever Girl seemed to remember her, so she went straight to the point.

“You’re doing well at the seminar.” She began, looking straight forward and not at the expectant face by her side. If looking at people’s eyes already made her lose focus normally, it was especially so when that person already unnerved her in any way. And especially so when said person’s eyes were a mesmerizingly beautiful shade of hazel when observed closely. “Like, exceedingly well. Phenomenally. I never see you stay and look at the grades, so I don’t know if you’re aware of it, but you had the best grade in class on every graded activity so far. The results for our first exam are just out, by the way. You did it again. Congratulations, an impressive 9,5 on that honestly evil test.”

Not before Kaisa could worry about coming across as creepy for knowing her score, but before she could apologise for it, the girl laughed. Not a full belly sound, but a cute little snort that she seemed to have been holding back.

“You must think I’m so laid back! I always come here after the seminar because it’s dusk, and it’s honestly so gorgeous from here that I don’t want to lose it. But after the sun is set I always climb back there and see the results. Thank you for telling me, though, I had been worried about that exam. I don’t think the professor had our best interests in mind when she wrote it, honestly.”

Kaisa made an agreeing sound with the back of her throat. A part of her wanted to rush to assure that she hadn’t thought of Johanna as lazy or happy-go-lucky in any way, but that wasn’t actually true. Besides, the curious and honest part of her brain won out over the social skills part of her brain in the end (though, given past experiences, she wondered if her brain even had a social skills sector at all).

“Why, though? I mean, the buildings block the view from all sides, it’s not like you can actually see the sunset. The sky gets some pretty colours, but can’t you see those from the windows?”

Beside her, Johanna chuckled. Kaisa heard the sound close to her ear, and felt the small rush of air from her mouth on her skin. When she turned, she saw the glimmer on Golden’s eyes. It felt weird, being that close to someone. And it felt new, that the chuckle hadn’t sounded diminishing, or ironic, but rather like she was looking at something sweet. Like Kaisa was something pure and worth protecting.

“Look around.” Golden whispered, and Kaisa did, trying her best to see it through her eyes. The students coming out of their classrooms all around them. The gentle chatter of friends who were meeting to study together, or to carpool home. The beginnings of an evening breeze toying with the ends of their hair. The soft light that made even the well-trimmed trees look mysterious, and their nearly completely golden leaves glow.

Oh.

There was a moment of extreme softness, watching all the beauty around them, its mundanity making it no less special, and even a bit more so. If they were in a movie, it would be a cue for sweet classical music to begin playing, Kaisa thought, symbolising a growing bond between the two protagonists or whatever. She wasn’t a cinema major. So, of course, she ruined it by clearing her throat and going back to the task at hand.

If she was anything like a movie protagonist, she wouldn’t have lost her top-of-every-class title, now, would she?

“You have a point. Anyway, I came here to ask you if you have any tips for studying this subject. I generally draw schemes while reading the textbook and then look for practice exercises. It has worked well so far, but clearly you have something that works better. You don’t have to share it if you don’t want to, of course, but if there’s any tips you could give me, I’d be grateful.”

Golden Retriever Girl only stared at her for a beat, her silence making Kaisa retrace her words and wonder if she’d said anything offensive. When her answer came, it startled her enough to make Kaisa turn to glare at her.

“I don’t do anything special. I just enjoy it?”

“Enjoy it?” Kaisa asked with the tone of someone who felt like there had been an attempt to fool her, and hadn’t fallen for it. Golden gave no signs of falsehood, though. She only shrugged and turned her eyes down to the closed sketchbook on her lap, twirling her pencil around.

“Yeah. I relate a lot to neoclassicism. I spent my first years in my grandfather’s cottage out in the wilderness, so all the paintings of farm life feel familiar to me. Like they’re images that are close to my heart. Also the fugere urbem feeling in the writings speak really deeply to me, I had a hard time adapting when my parents brought me over to Trolberg when I was a child. I think that’s all there is, really. My study strategy doesn’t come close to being as neat as yours. I just… enjoy it.”

It shouldn’t have left Kaisa speechless, but it did. She didn’t even know why, it wasn’t like it was something out of this world. She herself had chosen her major, and this seminar, because of affinity, but somewhy it simply hadn’t crossed her mind that passion alone could get you that far. Which wasn’t to say that the Golden Retriever Girl (and really, she had been talking to her for a full five minutes, so maybe she should stop thinking about her that way) didn’t put in the effort; her behaviour in class alone was enough to tell Kaisa that that wasn’t the case. But being told that actually, that was the secret to her success wasn’t something she had even considered. Hell, most times Kaisa was so busy studying for all her classes she actually forgot that she had ever enjoyed her subjects to begin with.

“I see.” She said, hoping to not seem rude to the person who by this point already had reasons to think she was a stalker. Luckily, it didn’t seem like Johanna had taken offence.

“You don’t seem convinced.” She said playfully. “I have something to suggest. Why don’t we have our next study session for this seminar together?”

This snapped Kaisa out of her surprised haze.

“For real?”

“I mean, yeah, why not? If you’d like it, that is. I know some people only study well alone, and I totally respect it if that’s your case. But if you’d like to give it a go, I’m sure it would be fun. And you’d get to see how my studying isn’t nearly as effective as yours.”

She was smirking at her, and looking like she was actually hoping for Kaisa to say yes, for some reason. And though all her instincts told her to come up with an excuse to not do it, she couldn’t actually think of a single reason why that was a bad idea.

“Sure.”

Johanna blinked, and Kaisa realised that though she had been hoping for it, Johanna hadn’t actually expected her to say yes.

That’s what you get for ignoring someone who tries to make small talk on the first day.

“Great!” Golden chirped. “You free on Saturday?”

Kaisa mentally opened her schedule in her mind’s eye. Saturday was when the Sparrow Scouts had events, sometimes. She couldn’t remember if the one Frida had asked her to tag along to was this one or the next.

“I’m not sure, to be honest. I think my little sister asked me to go with her to a scouts thing, but I could have gotten the date wrong. I get really confused with my appointments when I have exams, it feels like my mind erases any information unrelated to them. Can I check that and get back to you?”

“Sure! Give me your hand.”

Kaisa blinked with surprise. Partly because she had half been expecting Johanna to give up on the idea. After all, why would she bother insisting on something she’d get nothing out of? Mostly, though, because being asked to give her her hand hadn’t really seemed to have been in the realm of possible answers. She did as she was told, however, and Kaisa watched as Johanna picked a ball-point pen from her jacket’s breast pocket and took it to her palm.

Too confused and focused on watching Golden Retriever Girl’s face to see what she was writing, Kaisa didn’t notice what it was right away. After having finished, she let her go and smiled once more.

“There you go! Text me or call me when you have the answer, whichever you prefer. I’ll see you around?”

She probably wouldn’t see her around, that was the only class they were taking together that semester and it only happened once a week, but Kaisa found herself nodding anyway. Having completed her goal (sort of), she stood up just as the first lamps began being turned on around them. It wasn’t nearly as pretty anymore with the artificial light, but somehow Johanna’s smile didn’t look any less bright. Kaisa bid her goodnight and got a “goodbye” handwave in response, walking away before she could fully process that interaction, and way before she allowed herself to interpret her emotions during it.

It was only when she was taking the long walk home, practically alone on the sidewalk of the highway that connected their campus to the city, that it occurred to her to check what had been written on her skin before she put on her noise canceling headphones and begun listening to a recording of the Advanced Grammar lecture she’d had in the morning.

She pulled back her sweater, which had only not been covering the tips of her fingers, to find a phone number and a winky face. Underneath, she had written “Jo from the seminar”, as if Kaisa could possibly forget.

That girl was insane, that was Kaisa’s verdict. When she got home and told this story to Tildy, she’d be advised to let this insanity rub off on her a bit, it would do her good.

And well, she had gone to her to learn her secret, hadn’t she?

#I am. SO excited about lauching this new era of my writing #and I warn you all that it's based on being unhinged and doing exclusively what brings me joy :)#this is such a shameless excuse to use all the cool literature knowledge i aquired in high school tbh #it might not even apply to the literature movemnts I'm talking about outside of my country but bear with me here!!!#sketchbook ship #my fic #sketchbook ship hilda #sketchbook ship fanfic #johanna hilda #kaisa hilda #sketchbook college au #<-this is such a specific tag Im 100% sure unless the ship becomes canon No One will ever search for it ISHDKJSKDFH #fic: inutilia truncat #verse: carpe diem

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stitched-mouth · 1 year

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The Sandman Masterlist

Notes: Anyone you see missing here are characters I don’t write for. I do not write sexual content for Matthew. I loved this series but the acting was really painful to watch; but I think it was the writing because I’ve seen most of the cast in other projects and their acting is great. Also it’s every single actor in this show, so I really wonder what happened. Maybe it’s because every single line of dialogue was taken directly from the books.

Codes

🦋 = Headcannons

💄 = Fem Reader

☘️ = GN Reader

🌷 = Fic

🖤 = Angst

🏳️‍🌈 = Gay

✨= Fluff

🌚 = NSFW

Dream of The Endless (Morpheus)

To Be Continued…

Desire of The Endless

To Be Continued…

Death of The Endless

To Be Continued…

Luiennce (Librarian of The Dreaming)

To Be Continued…

Matthew the Raven

To Be Continued…

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heymacy · 11 months

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beecy, i'm absolutely LOSING IT over these tags:

LOLOL the image of you just scrolling through a sideblog in therapy... what's the URL?

beecy beecy beecyyyyyy first of all hi hello i love you more than life itself 💛

i think the url would be look-johanna-im-insane bc it’s simple, direct, and gets the message across without becoming muddled by internet speak. i genuinely think she would enjoy it but first she would be SO CONCERNED ajskdfk. but oh god…..oh GOD now i think i have to do this. johanna babe i am so sorry for what i’m about to put you through, i’m not so sure you deserve this lmao 😅😇

#you wanna know something even more insane than i am?#i have actually never discussed fandom with johanna and i’ve been seeing her for over a year #isn’t that BONKERS???#like fandom is this HUGE part of my life (arguably one of the biggest — is that sad? funny? concerning? jury’s still out)#and yet it’s never even been mentioned #she knows y’all as my friends that i met online #and she knows that i write ‘little free gay stories’#but i don’t think she knows what fandom/fanfic/fanart even ARE #so yeah that’s some bonkers shit it has to be said #maybe in our next session i’ll be like ‘listen. we need to talk about something.’ and just UNLOAD #she’s going to be terrified ahsjdjsksjk #JOHANNA I LOVE YOU PLS DON’T LEAVE ME YOU KNOW I HAVE ABANDONMENT ISSUES #macy babbles #gallawitchxx

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cagesings · 1 year

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i’ve ramble about jo’s reluctance towards flowers before but to clarify, don’t give her flowers because being given them ( or gifts in general at times ) reminds her of turpin, who commonly used gifts in an effort to ‘persuade’ her/in his efforts to groom her. this is especially true for roses, since that was the flower she was most often given. however, she has no problem with flowers just existing outside. just don’t try to give her any and she probably won’t touch them.

#she has legitimate anxiety attacks over this before and i hate it #i feel bad for the muses who are like 'all women deserve flowers on their birthday'#if you give johanna flowers on her birthday she will chuck them out the window #*❈ ‣ 𝘩𝑜𝑤 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑟𝑒𝑚𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑡 𝑡𝘩𝑒 𝑟𝑎𝑖𝑛? — ( headcanon. )#grooming tw #i also need to talk about turpin's abuse because there is A Lot there i just need to get it down in writing

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littlesilverplatinum · 2 years

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Sofia and Melor Shishko – the parents of Johanna Otsu.

Being an only child, a lot was put upon Johanna’s young shoulders. From an early age she was brought up to be the best. Academically, creatively, as well as socially; a daughter they could be proud of, and to be fair… Johanna did follow her parents’ wishes without much protest. Though her hobbies and interests never truly had been hers to choose, she took to them with ease and learned to enjoy them – and she grew to be quite remarkable at playing the flute because of this. But, as time passed and she grew, Johanna became lost within herself. Though her parents wished for the best for her, they inevitably brought her down a path of not being able to make proper choices for herself. Right or wrong wasn’t so easy to discern, and the intent of others equally so. After all… If mom and dad weren’t there to make the choice for her, how was she to know if she was making a bad one?

Koh Otsu, a man she met on the train ride back home after practice, was the one choice in her life that Johanna made for herself. And it is also the choice of which caused a rip between herself and her parents; one that hasn’t been mended to this day.

Falling pregnant at the age of 16 by a grown man was, in their eyes, her own stupid fault.

---

Masae and Hiroji Otsu – the parents of Koh Otsu.

Much like his young wife, Koh grew up as an only child. Had his mother not struggled with fertility, however, then surely he would’ve earned himself quite a few siblings. Masae was a mother who perhaps, in certain ways, cared far too much for her child. Koh faced many struggles early in his life, from that of a stutter of which rendered his speech almost impossible to understand, to a loneliness of which festered within his breast like an obsession – there was, perhaps, little that his parents actually could’ve done to mend what was broken within him since birth.

Hiroji was loving and understanding, but he never connected to his boy in the way that fathers perhaps should. Masae tried her outmost, but her love did little else than push him further away.

Koh left home at age 18 with foul words and the promise to become someone known. It wasn’t until he sent a picture of his infant daughter, cradles in the arms of a girl much younger than himself, that they heard from him again.

---

Johanna and Koh Otsu – the parents of Hikari Otsu.

The pair that came to be did, indeed, follow in the footsteps of those before them. An only child, Hikari grew up in a household that was surprisingly warm – given where things would lead. A teenage mother and a father working to keep their bills paid; it’s the average family story of many in Sinnoh. Where things divert is, perhaps, hidden just under the surface. Hikari was a daddy’s girl from birth, and her relationship with him was as close-knit as a father and daughter could be. The years, however, weren’t kind to them – and shortly after a business trip gone awry (a memory, formed yet better left forgotten), little Hikari never again saw her dearest father.

Johanna was a good mother. A great one, in fact, but the scars left upon them due to Koh’s departure is one that stretch between them to this day. Hikari grew distant from her mother, never quite forming the bond with her that she had with her dad – and perhaps, in a way, it’s her own doing; for Johanna certainly hadn’t lacked in trying. Eventually, however, one gives up on making the impossible happen. Even when Hikari returned from being missing for three long years, Johanna was there for her in an instant. Cradled her, cared for her and promised her that no other harm ever could come her way – and though Hikari knows her mother means well, and knows – in her own way – that if she simply allowed herself to be happy, then their relationship could be a great one.

But she’s stubborn. She’s spiteful and keeps to the idea that the only one of her two parents that matter is her father.

Koh didn’t want Johanna, no matter what the reason may be. And Hikari?

Well… She’s just like her daddy.

#(ic - muse)#(Guest - Father)#(Guest - Mother)#hc #family #inspired by amanos posts #i havent really talked about johannas parents much tbh but i dont have too much when it comes to them #just these basics #plus what ive written in old drabbles where hikari met her grandmother #i really wanna write more about koh and johanna at some point tbh their relationship is.... very interesting to me personally #theres a LOT there

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bruisedboys · 4 months

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i love ur writing sm 🥹 since we got jealous!finnick can we get jealous!reader and how finnick reacts to it? ❤️

“Baby, come on.” Finnick follows you out of the glass elevator, almost jogging to catch up with your angry march. You speed up pointedly. “What did I do?”

“Nothing, Finnick,” you say sharply, without looking at him. The entire elevator ride was heavy with your silent irritation. You don’t want to talk about it, obviously.

“Well, why are you acting like I did?” Finnick presses.

“I’m not.”

“You are.”

“I’m not.”

“You— sweetheart.” Finnick snags your wrist and pulls you back. You scowl, annoyed at being pushed around. You struggle in his grip but he only grabs your other wrist, holding you still. It’s times like this that you hate having such a muscular boyfriend.

“Come on,” he says, practically begging with you now. “What’s the matter? I don’t understand why you’re so mad.”

“It’s nothing,” you say through your teeth, still struggling against his grip.

Finnick rolls his eyes and holds you tighter, his fingers digging into your wrists. “Is this about Johanna?”

“What?” You falter in your attempts to escape. It is about Johanna, actually. You’d rather he didn't know that, though. “Why would it be about Johanna?”

Even to your own ears your incredulity sounds fake, your voice a notch too high. Finnick stares at you hard and you look away, burning hot under his gaze. Big mistake.

“So it is about her?” he asks slowly. You can hear the knowing smirk in his voice.

“I don’t—“ you stammer, desperately trying to string together a lie that’s not as embarrassing as the truth. You stare at him and his awful grin for a few seconds, fuming. Then, “Fine, yes, it’s about Johanna. She wouldn’t leave you alone!”

“We talked for ten minutes, honey,” Finnick says, measured to your frantic. “You know she’s just a friend.”

“She called you handsome and then winked at you,” you say, mortified, your act completely forgotten. "What am I supposed to think about that?"

You realise your mistake too late — you’ve given yourself away. You’re about to take it back in an attempt to save yourself from an onslaught of teasing when Finnick laughs.

“So you’re saying I’m not handsome?” He asks, eyebrows raised.

Bastard. You hate him, you swear.

“Never mind,” you say bluntly. “Whatever.”

You twist out of his grasp and stalk off. You’re still absolutely rolling in annoyance when you get to yours and Finnick’s shared room. You get as far as the entryway before Finnick’s on you again like a hawk. He grabs you while you're sliding your shoes off and pushes you none too gently against the nearest wall.

“I’m sorry,” he says.

“Sure you are. You just laughed at me!" You say incredulously, hitting him in the chest.

“Because you’re being silly, darling," Finnick says. Somehow, he makes it sound affectionate. He strokes your cheek with the back of his hand. "Johanna’s a friend. How can you think I’d ever look at anyone else that way when I have you, hm? I’m yours forever, sweet girl."

You blink at him. What is his problem? He laughs at you for being jealous and then says something as life ruining as that? He’s gonna be the death of you one day.

"You really need to stop saying things like that,” you say weakly.

Finnick tilts his head to the side, a knowing look in his ocean eyes. “Why’s that?”

You glare. “You know why.”

Finnick just laughs. “You’re adorable.”

You’re about to tell him to shut up when he kisses you, too fast for you to see it coming, too lovely for you to stop it. His mouth is warm. He tastes like wine. You forget you’re angry at him. When he’s kissing you like this, you have no reason to be jealous. You guess you never really did.

“I’m sorry,” you say when he pulls away. His kiss has unravelled you. Sucked away all your anger and hot jealousy. “For being so mad at you. S’not your fault.”

"It's okay," Finnick tells you, shrugging. He dips down to kiss you again. You push up on your toes to reciprocate his heat, your hand pushing up to love on the hair at the nape of his neck. He’s pulling back before either of you can get too carried away, a smug smile on his pretty mouth as he says, “Jealousy looks good on you, baby."

thank you for reading! please consider reblogging if you enjoyed it 🤍

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writersblockiskillingme · 4 months

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Jabberjays | Johanna Mason

Pairing: Johanna Mason x fem!reader (District4!Finnick's sister!reader)

Summary: During the attack of the Jabberjays Katniss is introduced to a whole different Johanna.

Warning/s: a bit of angst, a bit of fluff, the quarter quell, jabberjays, panic, screaming, weapons, you know typical hunger games stuff, also this is more like a short blurb but yeah, possible grammar and spelling mistakes

Author's note: I always wanted to write something about the Jabberjay attack so I absolutely loved the request! Also I made the reader Finnick's sister, I hope that's okay. Hope you enjoy!!

Request -> hi! i have a request for johanna!! could u do one where fem!reader and her are in a relationship that’s not secret just private (like only finnick knows) but something happens in the arena where johanna gets worried about r & finnick and katniss have a talk like johanna and katniss did in the movie abt annie? sry if that was too long or didn’t make sense! ty <33

Johanna just went into the thick forest to get some water with the spile that Haymitch send them so that they don't die of dehydration. She was regretting it now.

Katniss, Peeta, Beetee, your brother Finnick and you were on the beach. You were sitting with Katniss on the dry sand as you anxiously waited for Johanna to return from the forest as you stated at the hole in the sand that Johanna's ax made.

Thankfully, you thought to yourself, she took it with her.

Everything was relatively peaceful, too peaceful even. You didn't like it one bit. Something was coming. The game makers wouldn't allow the things to be so peaceful for so long. You were soon proven right as you heard the ear piercing scream that only seemed to shake through you.

"Johanna!" Your voice screamed back, every bit of common sense leaving you as you bolted towards the sound of Johanna's bloody-like screams.

You left your knives on the beach, along with the rest of your team that were screaming your name, confused from your actions as they tried to keep up with you. You were in a vulnerable place as you waved your hands around, trying to keep the thick leaves, that were swang down blocking your vision, away from your face as you ran still screaming Johanna's name as much as she screamed yours.

"Johanna!" You shouted as you reached the center of the forest where Johanna's screams were.

You were moving around in the circle, trying to determine where exactly her voice was coming from. After a while it hit you as you realized that her screams were coming from above. High in the trees. Then you saw the jabberjays flopping their little wings in the air, swaying the leaves of the trees and you knew that you fell right in the Capitol's trap.

"Y/N!" Finnick's muffled voice came towards you and you quickly turned towards him. Katniss, Beetee and Peeta were there with him, looking extremely concerned.

But why were they not coming closer?

The painful sounds of Johanna's screaming was messing with your head, panick gripping onto each and every fragment of your mind and body.

Why were they not coming over? Why aren't they helping? Why are they just standing there?!

Your felt your arms moving up, your hands gripping your head to try and kill the ever racing thoughts and the continuous mocking of the jabberjays. Then, as your eyes frantically searched the area, you spotted Johanna. Her eyes full of concern only reserved for her close friends and her love.

Then, the next thing that happened just confused you even more. Finnick grabbed her arm quickly, stopping her as she moved forward towards you, ax in her hand. She twisted her arm, releasing her arm from Finnick's grip as she yelled at him while he talked to her about something that you didn't hear. Her expression changed from concerned to utterly horrified.

"Y/N!" You heard Johanna's muffled, concerned voice mixing with the imitation of the screaming that the jabberjays provided.

You didn't think, the constant screaming was too much. You ran towards her, but came to a stop when your body hit something invisible. The force field. You started banging your hands against the force field trying to ignore the looks of pity and concern from your lover, brother and allies. You didn't want to except this.

The screaming intensified as the birds got closer to you, and you found yourself sliding onto the ground, screaming bloody murder just so you could tone down the sound of Johanna's and Finnick's torturous screams. Johanna was taping on the force field shouting at you something that you didn't understand.

That's how Johanna found herself banging her ax forcefully against the force field, trying to break it. Finnick next to her, hitting the force field with his trident, his eyes full of concern as he watched his baby sister's torture.

The new hour began and Katniss watched the scene in front of her not believing the state that Johanna was in. The hurried movements with her ax, the horrified expression on her face, her eyes full of concern. She cared about someone here. She actually, genuinely, cared about someone here.

"Y/N!" Johanna's voice reached your ears, tearing through the ringing in them as you swayed back and forth on the ground. "The hour is up! You okay! It's over! I'm here!"

After you finally came to your senses enough to look at her, you immediately wrapped your arms around her as tightly as you possibly could, not letting go.

"Johanna," You gasped through neverending sobs as your body shook against hers. "You're all right."

"We're both alright." She answered you with the softest voice Katniss ever heard.

Later on you all gathered at the beach once again. Peeta and Beetee went of a bit further away on the beach, looking for some food. Johanna and you settled down on the edge of the beach away from the rest of the team, but still in their eyesight, and finally Katniss and Finnick sat down, learning against the trees.

"Are they together?" Katniss asked Finnick, breaking the silence. "Johanna and Y/N?"

"Yes." Finnick answered immediately, his sea-green eyes snapped to look at her gray ones. "They didn't really keep it a secret, it was private. Only Mags, Annie, Haymitch and I knew really. They wanted to keep it in the close circle of friends."

"I've never seen Johanna act like that before," Katniss quietly murmured as she processed this new information that Finnick told her. "It was quite terrifying."

"Yeah, well," Finnick couldn't help himself as he chuckled playfully at her confession. "Johanna loves her so much. It is terrifying, honestly." He, however, continued on a more serious note. "Y/N won her games a year before Johanna. She helped her when she was going through tough times after she went out of the arena. Johanna lost her family. Y/N is the only thing that she lives for, now. She said it herself when I gave her, correction," Finnick held his finger up in the air, noting that he expressed himself wrongly. "Tried, key word tried, to give her I'm-her-older-protective-brother-so-you-better-not-hurt-her speach."

"And how did that turn out?" Katniss couldn't help but to ask, given how Johanna was she knew that his answer was going to be good.

"Oh, she smacked me across the head." Finnick smiled and Katniss found herself laughing at his answer just like she expected to.

Finnick and Katniss gazed to the couple that was still knee deep in the water, arms wrapped around each other as you sat in between Johanna's legs, your back leaning against her front.

"I'm glad that they have each other," Katniss spoke her thoughts out loud. "Even though they are so different they just seem to fit so well with one another."

"Definitely."

"What the hell are you two gossiping about?" Johanna called out causing you to giggle softly as you spoke.

"Yeah! And why the hell didn't you invite us?!"

TAGLIST:

@caroline-books @thecrowdedstreetin1944

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wonderlandwalker · 4 months

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Remember | Finnick Odair x Reader

THG Masterlist / Taglist / Inbox

Summary: The capitol has taken you from him, but he won't let them keep you. You can find pt. 2 here!

Content Warnings/Tags: Violence, bullet wounds, major character injury, blood, needles, angst, fluff, no use of y/n

Word Count: 4.0k

Requested by Anon: omg I love your writing and I have an unhealthy addiction to reading angst so could you please write something about the reader being with peeta and Johanna when they where taken by the capital and her being with finnick and recovering while she’s in district 13? 🫶🫶

A/N: The way I smiled when I saw this request I swear. This one has been in the works for a little while and I thought it fit perfectly. It is angst you ask for and it is angst you shall get. I'm considering writing a part two but I'm not sure how to yet. My bad habit of not proofreading happened again and with this one especially it was way too long so if I made any major errors pls do let me know.

The Capitol.

You are currently in the Capitol.

At least that’s where you think you are. You remember being in the arena, you remember running towards the general direction you last saw Finnick, remembering the marks you had gone by in case you had to take a different route. You remember seeing Finnick's face through the plantation, you’d be able to recall those features anywhere. You remember something hitting you from behind and falling to the ground, too caught up in catching up with him to check your surroundings. You remember crying out in pain, hoping he’d hear you. But the next thing you remember is the vision of him slowly going out of focus and losing consciousness not long after.

At least that's what you think happened.

At least you can still remember, that’s worth something right? You remember your past, and you remember the reaping that led to the arena. The flood of relief that went over you as you finally found your way back to him. You don’t know what happened to Finnick, he was there too after all, but you had needed to split up early. Maybe he had been caught off guard too. Maybe he escaped. Maybe they never even found him. Maybe with him being the idiot he could be, he was probably already on his way here, looking for you. Just like you would have done for him, and he would have called you an idiot then too.

You would get out of here one way or another, that much you knew, but you needed to remember more, you needed to remember the last look on his face, you hadn't had much time to take it in, but you remembered the furrow of his eyebrows, the same expression he always had when he was trying to concentrate, you needed to remember that.

You knew that once you did get out of here, Finnick would be furious, telling you that you had been reckless, that you shouldn't have let your guard down, shortly after telling you how worried he had been. And it would feel like coming home.

Your mind becomes hazier, and it is harder to remember. You feel your head throbbing, and you move your hand towards it until you feel it can move no further. You open your eyes slowly, trying to adjust to the bright light that covers the room. You can't see much, can't move your head much.

You remember the rendezvous point you had talked about. You remember the quick “don't get yourself in trouble” and the kiss he gave you right before you parted ways.

You remember the layers of plants and trees you moved through, seeing some of them cut down, letting you know someone else had been there

But you know there is more, more that you missed. The stomped-out ashes that you ran past, you know you should have paid closer attention. But you can’t remember

You need to remember what happened. How you got here. Who got you here. If you really are in the capitol. But your mind doesn't want to cooperate anymore. The room is getting darker and darker, even though the lamp above your head is still dutifully buzzing

You wake up, you still remember where you are, or at least where you think you are. You still remember yesterday, was it yesterday? Why couldn't they just hang a clock in here?

You look up, and you see a device set up, not too far from where you're lying down. You try to get a better look but the light above your head is too blinding to see anything else in the room. You don’t fully understand it until a man walks into the room with a video camera in his hand and an expression on his face that seems just a tad too happy.

The camera starts blinking a red light, signalling you that it has started recording. The man has a sort of laser that he presses into your lower stomach, it doesn't breach your skin but it hurts like it does. It takes all your energy not to show him the satisfaction of it.

“Come on now darling, work with me a little.” He says after a while, changing the setting on the laser. The last bit of your energy is gone, and you can't keep the screaming from escaping any longer. It echoes off the white walls around you and when you hear yourself, you barely even recognize it. He seems satisfied with the result and finally puts the laser down. You look down but don't see any burn marks or indication of what has just happened.

He comes closer and you can see he is holding a sort of crowbar, but you're not sure why. You remember how you always left one outside your window in the districts, in case the wind had shut it and you needed to sneak back in. You remember Finnick finding out, giving you a serious, disappointed look, but not telling you to stop.

Before you can think of anything else, the bar hits you with full force, right above the spot he was previously focused on. You didn't expect it, and it knocks the little breath you had left out of your lungs. He hits again, not in the same spot, but close, he is very clearly aiming for your ribs. The switching between high-tech and old-school weapons has you puzzled, but you can't deny the result either of them has.

After a while, he stops, and with the added difficulty and pain that now comes with breathing, you are more than certain he just bruised a few of your ribs.

He walks back, taking the camera in his hands. He aims it at your face and you close your eyes to try and collect yourself as much as your current state allows. Your hair is a tangled mess and you are rather certain there is blood smushed over your face from the cuts you got in the arena.

“Smile for the camera sweetheart.” He asks, even though it sounds more like an order than a request. You open your eyes to look at him. He is so close, and you want to drive your thumbs so far into his eye sockets you can feel the front lobe of his brain, if he even has one. But you can't do anything, no matter how much you want to fight, you are powerless here. You close your eyes again, trying to block everything out and remember.

You remember District Four, the way the light summer breeze would always carry the smell of the beach to your house, no matter how hard you had it, it always livened you up. You remember the first time Finnick tried to teach you how to surf, being so gentle with you no matter how many times you fell off it, always there to catch you again. You remember your last birthday, well, the day after, but you couldn't even complain about that. He had picked you up from your place and brought you to one of the lakes with him. He told you the story of one of his birthdays when he was younger, along with all the embarrassing details, but of course, it only endeared him further to you. You told him about the presents you got and all the people who came to wish you a happy birthday. You told him everything you could remember. You remember last seeing his face, maybe it was the last time you will have ever seen it. No. No, you remember it, but you’ll see it again, you have to.

“I’ll make sure your loverboy gets to see this, wherever he is, wouldn't want him to miss out on the fun.”

Finn. Finnick. You remember Finnick. You remember when you returned from your first games. The black eye and broken arm you came home with. You remember how he lost it when they didn't immediately treat you for it. He would now either throw a fit over it for everyone to see or be so stoic in his thoughts even Johanna would get a little concerned.

You see the man standing up, walking to the table, and picking up something new. A syringe, it's a syringe. He walks over and pushes it into your upper arm, and before you know it, your vision turns black again.

You remember waking up to gunshots, and you panic. But after a few seconds, you figure out they’re not near you. There is, however, someone in the room with you, it's the same man again. He looks a little panicked, but you can’t figure out why just yet. The gunshots are becoming louder, and closer, and he seems more startled now. His arms drop to his sides from what he was doing and his eyes widen. Screams are echoing and you can hear footsteps.

You remember that pattern of paddling feet, and you recognize the second pair of steps too, but you can't remember much else.

The man gets closer to you, placing his hand over your mouth, pulling out a gun with his free hand and telling you to stay quiet. You never understood why people say that, it means he has something to lose, and you want to scream out, but your voice doesn't remember how to.

It's even closer now, right outside the door, and you can hear talking. You remember his voice. How he always asked you so sweetly how your day had been, the way he whispered sweet nothings in your ear as you fell asleep.

You hear the door jiggle, and it makes you want to scream out for him, but your sore throat won't let you. For a moment you think that is it, you had your chance, and you let it go by. He’ll move along the hallway to the other doors and leave you here. But then you hear another gunshot, and they must have shot the lock, because right after you hear someone running into the door with an echoing thump as it breaks open.

The man next to you had his gun pointed at the door, and he changes it to point at you instead.

You were right, by the gods you had never been so thankful to have been right. Finnick walks in, and you can see the colour drain from his face as he does so.

The man standing next to you is starting to get nervous, you can see the sweat starting to drip down his face. He must realize he has been matched, because there are more people by Finnicks side. But the man still has his gun pointed at you, and this isn't over just yet.

You can't keep your eyes open anymore, and when you close them, you remember. You remember your first kiss with Finnick, how nervous he had been at the time. He had been shaking a little and told you he was embarrassed by how much you got to him, but it only endeared him further to you. He yells at the man to let go of the gun, he sounds nervous again.

But he doesn't let go, he decides to shoot.

You hear the bullet leaving the gun, and for a single moment, you think it's over. The last thing you’ll ever see is Finnick, but he’s not himself. He’s upset, and even though you know he’s not upset with you, it still tugs at you. Except when you feel the bullet piercing through your skin, that's exactly what you realise. You can still feel it. He didn't shoot you right in the heart, he didn't shoot towards your head, he shot you in the abdomen. You’re not sure why, not sure why he didn't kill you, but you will never know, because not even a second passes as you hear a second gunshot, and he falls to the floor.

You can't seem to remember how to open your eyes, but you can hear Finnick rushing over and right as he reaches you, you fall. You fall into his arms and the memory of it gives you hope. Something comes in contact with your stomach, and the agony of it makes you want to scream out. You can feel him lifting you, and the shift of your body makes the bullet move, making you want to scream again. And if you remembered how to, you would have.

You know he’s talking to someone, but it sounds more like buzzing to you. You can only make out certain parts of the conversation, something about needing to leave, something about infections, and something about an aircraft.

You can hear him talking again, and this time it’s directed at you. There’s a strain in his voice, and it sounds like he’s crying. It makes you want to comfort him, but you don’t remember how to.

“Please darling, just open your eyes."

But you’re afraid, youre afraid that if you open them, everything will turn out to be nothing but a dream, and he won’t be here anymore. But even if this is a dream, you need to see him. Even if it will turn into a haunted memory, you need to see his eyes looking back at you. It takes you some effort, but you open your eyes, looking at him. You can see tears flooding his face, you can see his lips moving, silent pleas coming from them for you to stay awake. He’s telling you how good of a job you’re doing, he's telling you to hold on. He promises that he won’t let anything bad happen to you ever again and that he won’t let go of you anymore.

You remember how he cried when you were reaped for the 75th games, and how you had told him everything would be okay, how you had comforted him, but you don't have the energy to comfort him this time. You remember hearing his sobbing, his shaking voice when you close your eyes again, not being able to keep them open any longer, even if you wanted to.

You wake up again, and for a moment you think it had indeed all been a dream, that you were right back where you had started, But then you remember the bullet in your stomach. You look down and see a bandage over it, even though it’s already soaked in blood. They must have taken it out.

You try and concentrate, and you can hear Finnick talking to someone. “Just tell me, I know it’s bad but I need to know.” “Finnick, it won’t make a difference.” The person he’s talking to sounds desperate, and you remember how stubborn he could be when it came to you.

But you don’t remember more, because your head starts to feel light again and you give in to the feeling.

When you wake up again, you manage to open your eyes, and you can see someone sitting in a chair next to the bed you're in. He’s slumped over, his face half pressed into the mattress and half into your stomach, both of his hands are holding onto one of yours. It hurts a little, but you don't mind, because it reminds you, even when you look away, that he is still there. You remember the way he always softly snores, and the way he wiggles his nose when your hair falls over it.

You think you're connected to a monitor, because something is beeping in the same rhythm you can feel your heart beating, and it gives you a headache. So you close your eyes again, and once again, you give in to the feeling of sleep that looms over you.

Since you had been brought to District 13, he has barely left your side. He keeps putting cold washcloths on your forehead to try and break your fever. It won't help, and he knows it, but no one has the heart to stop him.

You haven't shown a single sign of life since they had found you. It was unsettling, the silence that filled the room, none of your usual laughter and banter there to replace it.

It’s only when Finnick's head shoots up that the others notice it as well. The steady beeping that has been imposing the silence in this room for weeks picking up its pace. The beating continues to go faster and faster, your body shaking up from the bed in almost the same rhythm. But right before anyone can do anything about it, it stops. It all seems to stop, you stop moving, and the monitor stops beating.

He starts giving you chest compressions, and someone rushes into the room holding a small bottle, they fill a syringe with the clear liquid and inject it into your arm. Within a few seconds, your heart starts beating again. But it’s only after a minute of the monitor showing him a steady heartrate that he stops his actions.

It’s dark in the room when Finnick wakes up, and if it wasn't for the soft light and the beeping of the monitor, he would've thought he was dreaming, but it seems the reality won’t let him escape. He struggles not to fall back asleep, and every few minutes he does, but every time he wakes up startled again, scared that you’ll be gone if he doesn't open his eyes every once in a while. It was easy to see the toll it had taken on him. His posture was slouched, his face less well-groomed than usual. But no one could blame him, because they could see the way he looked at you, as if you were the sun and your dimmed light turned his world dark.

He knows the chance you can hear him is small, but he feels the urge to talk to you nonetheless.

“I don't think I can hold this in any longer. I remember some studies that have shown people in comas do hear what's going on around them, but maybe it’s for the best that you don’t, because you would never say yes.”

He continues but he feels his voice choke up, and he runs a hand through your hair to calm himself down, his other hand still holding onto yours.

“We talked about it once, I still remember every single word you said. You came at me with all your logical reasons for why it would be a bad idea. But what you never understood is that when it comes to you, I'm not able to think rationally, because my love for you will overpower anything else.” He chuckles softly as he recalls the memory he’s about to tell you next.

“I remember when I opened up to you for the first time. I had always held things to myself, but you were so calm as I talked to you. I thought for sure I had screwed it up somehow then. Everyone always tells me now how happy you make me, and they're right. Ever since you came into my life there has not been a single moment when the thought of you did not bring me joy, even when we fought my memories of you could still somehow bring a smile to my face.

I remember when they showed me the video, they hadn't wanted me to see it, but you know how stubborn I can be when it comes to you. I saw you, I saw the way in which they were hurting you. And I started yelling, ironically enough in that moment, you were the only one that could have calmed me down. I remember yelling at them, fighting with them not to wait any longer, that they couldn't let you wait any longer, they had to have me sedating until they came to a conclusion."

He reaches into the pocket of his trousers, taking a small ring. It was his mother's ring, he had found it a while back and had carried it with him ever since. He had thought of moments to give it to you, but every time there was one, every time he was about to ask you, something had happened, something had interrupted him. But there was no one interrupting him this time. “I have thought about asking you this every time I see you, and I can't hold it in any longer. So when you wake up, not if you wake up, because I know you will. I know you will wake up because you have to. So when you wake up, will you marry me.” A little part of him had thought you'd wake up, that you’d answer him. Even if you said no, it would still be better than what's happening right now, because he didn't care if you'd say no, if you’d say you weren't ready, because nothing could be worse than the silence that followed him. And so he slid the ring onto your finger delicately, as if you were to disappear if he wasn't careful. He put the ring on your hand because he knew that even if it wasn't today, and it wasn't tomorrow, someday you would marry him, and he wouldn't let you slip away.

At first, he thought he was imagining it, sleep deprivation and desperation playing a trick on his mind. But then he saw it again, in the beams of morning light he could see your hand moving, as if it was trying to grasp onto something, trying to pull you back into this world. It woke him up in an instant. But it was all followed so fast, the way your eyes slowly opened, squinting at the light. Before you had even awoken for a second, he moved from where he had been right beside you in order to hug you. And he was about to get lost in the thought of your moving lips, tears falling down his eyes, about to get lost in a kiss full of built-up pain and desperation when he noticed, something was wrong. Your eyebrows were knitted together and the corners of your mouth turned down just a little. He looked at your expression, your body language, something was wrong. You looked vulnerable, you looked like you wanted to protect yourself from someone.

It was only when he looked into your eyes that he truly understood something was very wrong.

Your eyes looked as if you were in pain, but it wasn't a look of any physical pain, it looked as if something was endangering you, but he couldn't understand what it was. He slowly moved so as not to startle you and asked you “Darling, what’s wrong” And at first you didn’t respond, but when he kept looking at you, expecting him to answer you, you started to speak. “Am I supposed to remember you?”

He immediately flinched back at the statement, his shoulder sunk and his eyes dimmed. Someone told him it wasn't uncommon for brain injuries to cause short-term memory loss after a coma.

So slowly, and surely, he made it work. But it was crumbling him down every time you didn't remember the unconscious acts of affection, so foreign to you now. A quick touch on your arm as he walked towards you made you flinch slightly as if his hand had been on fire. The subtle smiles he gave you when entering a room were now met with you looking down. The way that even though you were physically here, you really weren't.

He promised himself, he vowed to himself that he would make you remember. That no matter how long it took, he would wait for you. He would wait for you to remember, make you remember. Because he had very quickly learned that he couldn’t live without you anymore.

Part 2: Trying to Forget

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allisluv · 7 days

Note

omg omg omg

imagine going in a haunted house thing with thg girls and you're just clinging their hand unearthly tight 😭😭

a thousand times yes anon!

haunted houses aren't katniss' thing but she would still go in if it was something you enjoyed. she doesn't mind you holding her hand, even if she loses blood circulation half way through, because it's worth it to see the giddy smile on your face.

johanna adores haunted houses and she's totally the type to scream just to scare you. she teases you for being a baby (lovingly of course) but she does love the fact that you cling to her.

lucy gray is a thrill seeker so i think she likes the adrenaline rush that haunted houses give her. she'll scream like a fucking maniac and end up burying her head in your shirt. she finds it adorable when you hold her hand.

you'd have to convince annie to go into a haunted house with you --you're lucky she loves you because there's no way she would be doing it for anyone else. she's the one gripping your hand like a vice and she doesn't let go until you're safely outside.

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cabotwife · 5 months

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Hi!! Loving all the Johanna fics you’ve been putting out! I was wondering if you could write Johanna mason x fem!reader where the reader gets caught in the jabberjay section of the quarter quell with Katniss and Finnick and hears Johanna’s cries. Afterwards they meet Johanna on the beach after the blood rain and reader is super distressed and thinks what she’s seeing is a trick.

(I know they are already with Johanna at this point but just for the sake of this they meet Johanna, Beetee, and Wires when they come out of the blood rain after the jabberjays.)

Thanks :)

hey! sorry this took so long, i have been struggling with writers block so bad recently 💔

This Love

Johanna Mason x Fem!Odair!Reader

warnings: very poorly written, rushed, probably ooc Katniss and Johanna, not proofread

word count: 1475

a/n: sorry if it's poorly written and soo late, i had an idea but no clue how to put it into words:(

a/n pt2: i tried posting this last night but i fell asleep, thinking i posted it and didn't realize it wasn't posted until i went to start another request..

your breathing is heavy as you trek across the sand of the beach. the sun is beating down on you and you’re covered in scrapes and cuts from the mutt attack.

while your brother and the District 12 tributes are talking to each other some distance behind you, you find yourself lost in your thoughts as you wander along the beach.

suddenly, a scream pierces through the air, causing you to jump and spin around to see if the others had heard it. however, they appear to be oblivious to the sound and continue their discussion.

you take in a shaky breath, but then the scream echoes again, and this time you recognize the voice.

"Johanna?" you gasp, staring wide-eyed into the dense jungle. "JOHANNA?!" you scream as you run towards it, pushing aside hanging leaves and jumping over tree roots.

"Y/N!" you hear Finnick call after you, but you can't bring yourself to care, not when your Johanna needs you.

you run with all your might until you reach a small clearing. the cries for help seem to echo around you, making your head spin. "Johanna?!" you call out, your voice loud, strained, and filled with raw emotions. "where are you?"

the cries for help blend into agonizing screams that send shivers down your spine.

tears begin to well up in your eyes as you frantically spin around, desperately searching for the source of the sound. "Johanna! Johanna, please!" you cry out. "where are you?!"

suddenly, a black bird swoops down near your head, calling out, "help! y/n!" your head jerks towards it, eyes widening as you notice the swarm of birds circling above you.

"no," you whisper, watching in horror as the bird continues to dive all around you.

in a panic, you turn on your heel and sprint back in the direction you came from. through the foliage of the trees, you can see the others, including Finnick, waving their arms and shouting, but their words are seemingly drowned out by the chaos.

you race towards your brother, the birds relentlessly chasing and circling you. all you can hear is Finnick and Johanna's desperate cries for help. tears stream down your cheeks as you finally reach your brother, only to be separated by an invisible wall.

"Finnick!" you cry out, pounding your fists against the barrier. "Finnick, help!" your voice trembles with pain, and you struggle to articulate your words as the birds continue their relentless assault.

overwhelmed, you sink to the ground, curling your hands around your head as you hide your face and cover your ears. leaning against the force field, you sob uncontrollably, feeling the weight of the situation.

after what feels like an eternity, the birds eventually fly away, and the force field dissipates.

your group rushes towards you, and Finnick immediately pulls you into a tight embrace, cupping your cheeks as you gaze at him with a distant expression.

“it’s okay, y/n/n, it was just jabberjays.” he murmurs, gently brushing your bangs away from your sweaty forehead.

you stay silent as he fusses over you, with Katniss crouched beside you, her hand soothingly placed on your back, and Peeta standing next to her.

"i'm okay," you eventually mutter, pushing away from the hands on you and standing up.

Finnick frowns at you, but before he can say anything, Katniss speaks up, "we should go back to the beach, where it's safe," she says softly, speaking cautiously, as if you were a child.

you say nothing as you make your way back to the sand of the beach, feeling relieved to be out of the jungle once again.

you settle yourself on the sand near the water's edge, with Katniss sitting beside you and Peeta staying close to her side. Finnick stands behind all of you, taking in his surroundings.

suddenly, you hear your brother suck in a sharp breath, "Johanna!" he shouts before sprinting down the beach. you flinch at the sound of the name, your head snapping up as you watch your brother run.

"Finnick!" you hear a voice calls back, a voice whose screams have been forcefully etched into your mind for the past hour.

Katniss turns to look at you as she stands, extending her hand towards you, "you coming?" she asks, her voice low and comforting.

you eventually nod, gripping her hand and allowing her to help you up.

the three of you follow behind Finnick, making your way towards the other three. as you look at Johanna, you notice how she is covered in blood, and suddenly nothing else matters. your thoughts consume you once again, 'Johanna needed you and you couldn't help her. she's hurt and it's all your fault.' your mind races as you continue to stare at the blood soaked brunette.

Katniss notices your distant look, and she takes your hand in hers, dipping her head and turning to meet your gaze as you still fixate on the other girl.

Johanna looks over Finnick's shoulder, locking eyes with you. her brows furrow in confusion at the look on your face. "y/n?" she calls out, her voice filled with concern, while she starts making her way toward you. your eyes widen in response to hearing your name escape her lips, and you find yourself staring back at her like a deer in headlights.

Finnick places his hand on her shoulder, causing her head to snap towards him. "what's going on with her?" she inquires, pulling away from the bronze-haired boy.

"there was an incident," he explains, "with jabberjays. she, uh.. she got lured into the jungle by jabberjays that were mimicking you."

"me?" Johanna breathes, glancing over at you. her expression changes as she watches Katniss squeeze your hand, speaking to you gently.

"yeah, she hasn't said much since we got her out.. she was in there for a while," Finnick mumbles. "you should talk to her, let her know that you're okay and stuff."

"looks like she has Katniss for that," Johanna grumbles, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms.

Finnick raises an eyebrow at the brunette. “go talk to her, i’ll take Katniss and the others down the beach further.”

Johanna lets out a deep sigh, nodding in agreement. Finnick pats her on the shoulder before motioning for Katniss and Peeta to join them. Peeta rushes over to your brother like an eager puppy being called by his master. meanwhile, Katniss slowly makes her way over, providing you with a few more words of reassurance before finally joining the group.

"hey," Johanna says as she approaches you. you continue to stare at her in silence, which seems to make her slightly uncomfortable. "hey," she gently cups your jaw, redirecting your attention from her bloodied shoulders to her eyes. "talk to me," she mumbles as she holds eye contact with you.

"i'm sorry i couldn't help you," you finally manage to say after a period of silence. tears well up in your eyes again as your lower lip quivers. "i'm sorry," you repeat.

Johanna's eyebrows furrow with confusion. "hey, what? don't be sorry. why’re you apologizing?"

"i couldn't help you," you mumble. "i- i couldn't find you. it was so loud. i'm sorry." tears stream down your cheeks as you speak, your voice coming out raspy but soft.

"y/n, listen to me, you did absolutely nothing wrong," she assures you, her voice filled with sincerity. "what you heard wasn't me, it was just a trick. it wasn't me." her other hand gently comes up to cup your other cheek, holding your face tenderly as she gazes into your eyes.

you swallow hard, holding unwavering eye contact with her. "i-" your words are abruptly cut off as Johanna ducks down and presses her soft lips against yours.

"i’m safe," she whispers, her lips barely grazing against yours. "i’m safe." she reaffirms her words with another kiss, deepening the connection between the both of you.

you instinctively wrap your arms around her neck, your fingers intertwining in her hair as you return the kiss.

you reluctantly break the kiss upon hearing your brother's wolf whistle. Johanna rolls her eyes playfully at him, turning in your embrace to give him an exaggerated middle finger. "fuck you, fish boy!" she exclaims, a grin on her face.

your brother dramatically gasps, his hand clutching his chest in mock offense. "wow! you call me fish boy after sucking face with my sister?"

your cheeks flush with color at his choice of words, but Johanna simply scoffs at him before turning her attention back to you, that same teasing grin still present on her face. she firmly grasps your waist before pulling you into another kiss, more passionate than the last. your fingers gently thread through her hair as you savor the moment.

#the hunger games #johanna mason x reader #johanna mason #katniss everdeen x reader #finnick odair x reader #peeta mellark x reader #josh hutcherson #requests open

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distantdarlings · 6 months

Text

BY THE FIREPLACE PT.3 // t. nott

RATING: R / 2.3K WORDS

Theo Nott x Fem Reader

+ SUMMARY - *Requested* You and Theo finally realize what exactly went down in the library after a very messy explanation from Mattheo, Enzo, and Pansy. Once the two of you go your separate ways and accept the embarrassment, you both start to let your imaginations wander.

+ WARNINGS - Language, slight sexual material (describing in character's heads)--not super graphic, Fem reader

+ MUSIC (listened to while writing) -

Johanna - Suki Waterhouse

---

“What—pray tell—the fuck are you doing in my room?” Theo roared, his back planted firmly against his headboard. You had migrated to standing at the end of the bed, your hands just balancing yourself against the mattress.

“What are you talking about? I fell asleep in the library, I—did you kidnap me?” you shrieked in realization.

“Are you kidding me? No, I didn’t fucking kidnap you. Are you daft?” he asks, his eyebrows furrowing. You scoff.

“Okay, first of all, you don’t need to be an ass about it,” you scolded, pointing a sharp finger at him, “and second of all, how the hell am I supposed to know if you did or not? I fell asleep in the library and woke up in your bed!”

“Look, I have no idea how—hey, where’s Sleepy?” he interrupted himself. He began gently pushing the covers around.

“I’m sorry, who?” you ask. He pulled the comforter back and laid across the bed horizontally to glance under the bed.

“Just my cat, she…,”

He paused and leaned back up. The two of you made direct eye contact and stared for what felt like hours. His eyes were slightly squinted as he looked at you, up and down, and you did the same to him. His mouth opened and closed multiple times as if starting to say something but nothing ever came out. Slowly, the two of you came to a very morbid discovery.

“Nott…how long have you had your cat?” you asked, hoping for an answer you knew you weren’t going to get.

“I found her today…,” both of your eyes slid shut, “in the library.”

You groaned and pinched the bridge of your nose between your thumb and forefinger. Merlin help you. Of course, the amazing luck that you were granted did nothing to prevent you from having the worst day of your life. It turns out that having an incredible, life-changing gift wasn’t always a blessing. You opened your eyes.

Theo’s head snapped up suddenly. His furrowed eyebrows had drawn down to match the line of his eyelid. His jaw clenched and unclenched ferociously. The anger radiating off of him was nearly palpable. It shocked you just a bit because you had never seen him as anything but cool and confident.

“Are you okay?” you asked cautiously. He stood from the bed and marched right past you. He made his way over to the dorm entrance, undid the lock, and ripped it open. As if newly appearing, three bodies fell in and clumsily on top of each other. Mattheo Riddle, Pansy Parkinson, and Lorenzo Berkshire stared up at a fuming Theo. His breaths were moving through him like a charging animal.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he demands. They all stumble to their feet, struggling over each other. Theo is watching them intently, all but tapping his foot at them.

“Personally, I feel that we hinted at it pretty strongly—” Enzo started.

“Obviously I didn’t fucking get it, why wouldn’t you say something?”

“In our defense, we didn’t think you were going to…you know…take her back to your room,” Pansy gestured vaguely.

“I thought she was a cat,” he enunciated each word slowly. “She was sweet and laying against me, I brought her in here so I could take a nap.”

“Well, it looks like you got a two-for-one deal!” Mattheo attempted a joke. Theo turned towards him with eyes like swords, begging to slash him into two. The dark boy’s smile dropped and he suddenly became very interested in the material of the drapes around him. You couldn’t stand this.

“Excuse me, I’m right here,” you say. “Would anyone like to tell me what the hell is going on?”

All three of them started to speak, trying to explain what exactly had been going down the last few hours. You could barely understand a single word. You refrained from rolling your eyes. This may be the worst thing that ever happened to you. Your eyes found the floor as the three students continued to try and explain everything over each other. A hand came to your mouth and you began to chew on the shredded skin along the edges of your nails. A bad habit, yes, but calming.

Your eyes glanced up to look at Theo. His eyes watched the other three intently, trying to decipher them as well. Your eyes trailed down his figure. Mind betraying you, you remembered the way he felt pressed up against your back. His long, lean chest was pressed tightly against your spine and his strong, darkened arms had been wrapped tightly—possessively—around your waist. His forearms had been locked so roughly against your hip bone, you’d had to use both hands to push yourself up. His soft breaths had been cooly painting the skin just below your ear, tickling the small hairs there. A shudder ran down your arms as if he had just done it again.

The three students stopped their chattering and looked at you. You stopped biting at your fingers and stared at them, wide-eyed.

“What?”

“You shuddered,” Pansy stated. Theo’s eyes found yours, his head ever so slightly tilting to one side. Fuck. Your eyes traced the line of his jaw down his throat.

“I…just had a chill,” you brushed the thoughts away. “Okay, thank you all for those wonderful…explanations. I have been mortified by this and will never mentally heal from it. I think I am going to go back to my dorm.”

And with that, you clapped your hands together and turned towards the exit. None of them said anything else to you or made any effort to stop you from going, so you figured you all would just awkwardly pretend it never happened. You figured your books and things were still back in the library so you started heading that way, hoping that nobody had tried to turn anything into the lost and found. How long had you been out?

“Okay, I don’t think laying with me is ‘mortifying,’” Theo scoffed.

“I think so,” Mattheo said. Theo responded by giving him a swift punch to the shoulder.

In the back of his mind, Theo heard Pansy make some kind of joke that sent the three of them into a spiral of laughter. But, for whatever reason, his thoughts were traipsing across a vast landscape. His mind's eye was traveling up the expanse of the sheets that were wrapped messily around the two of you. They were tracing the peak of her bare thigh that her tugged skirt had exposed and reminiscing on the way his hands had felt against her soft body. Her hair had just gently tickled the tip of her nose and she had smelled so, so good. Merlin, it had been so long since—

“Theo!” He jumped out of his own thoughts. His eyes found his very concerned friend group as they appeared to be waiting for an answer from him.

“Mate, I said your name, like, eight times,” Mattheo said. Theo shrugged.

“Sorry, I was distracted…” Theo thought he heard the other boy mumble a smart–ass comment but he just ignored him. His damned brain kept flying back to that girl. He didn’t know what it was but something about her waking up next to him like that had him seeing her in a whole new light. She wasn’t unattractive—she was anything but—but she really seemed to hate him. She was always rolling her eyes or scoffing anytime he announced a wrong answer in class. And she never called him by his first name, only his last. He can’t say he knew that much about girls but those particular attributes did not seem like they belonged to one that liked him.

He shrugged those thoughts off the best he could and followed his group of friends out of the dorm and into the common room where more of their acquaintances had begun to gather.

xxx

It had been hours. Hours and you were still thinking about Theo Nott. This was ridiculous. You needed to move on, needed to get to the homework you had been trying to get done this whole evening, but you just couldn’t. Every thought kept realigning itself to the way it felt when he had been holding you. It sent chills down your spine every time you thought about it. You had never been held like that.

Your roommates were all out late, trying to have a good time down at the Three Broomsticks. They had begged you to come but, due to a particularly interesting afternoon, you had incidentally become very behind on your homework. So you declined and promised you would next time.

Yet, you still weren’t done with this stupid assignment and probably could have gone with them anyway. You groaned in frustration and dropped your head against the desk, feeling the cool wood beneath it.

This morning, if you could have guessed what you’d be doing, mulling over the way Theo’s arms looked, would not have even been in the top one million guesses. But here you were, practically drooling over the way his veins wrapped around his muscular arms.

You remembered the way his large hands had been so gently placed over your stomach, the tips of his fingers gently gripping your flesh while he slept. The way his hips were pressed firmly against your ass—

“Aah!” you squealed in utter shame, shaking the thoughts away from your head. What the fuck, what the fuck. You might die. The fact that you couldn’t get him off your mind despite how much you couldn’t stand him was disconcerting. You’d always thought he was extremely handsome, as did practically everyone else, but you never thought you’d even imagine in that…way. Damn it.

Theo rolled over, tugging the comforter back over his shoulders. He shut his eyes once more, trying painfully hard to will himself to sleep. He had Quidditch practice in the morning, he needed to get some rest. He needed to. But he couldn’t. That stupid—you were running through his mind like a record stuck on rotate. It kept going and going, scratching against him. He’d never, ever thought about you in any way other than annoyance. But he couldn’t get you off his mind.

All he could think about was the way you were arched gracefully against his hips when you were laid out together. The way your skirt was pulled over your hips and he could almost see the line of your underwear beneath the sheets. He wondered what color they were, what they looked like. He kept his eyes closed, clenching them harder. Go to sleep.

Your body was pressed against his just like before. The light outside made your hair and shoulders glow, spotlighting every rise and fall your breathing pushed through you. Your hair was pulled over your shoulder and splayed gracefully over the pillow. He wanted to touch it but he kept his hands firmly where they were.

Suddenly you grunted gently and rolled over, coming face to face with him. This time you didn’t jump back and scream and accuse him of kidnapping you. This time, your eyes were opened and simply watching him. Your gaze was lidded and sultry, your lashes creating a sinister shadow along your cheeks. A small smirk spread over your lips as he watched you. Still, he did not move.

Your hands slowly rose between the two of you. Your soft, nimble fingers found the buttons of your uniform shirt and began working them down. Theo’s breath halted in his chest as more and more of you were revealed. Your hands granted him passage to your chest. You wore a laced black bra that was cinched tightly between your breasts. His eyes flickered down once, twice. He swallowed thickly.

Your hands pulled away from your shirt once the last button was undone and pushed him back so he rested comfortably against the headboard. You pushed a leg across his lap and settled neatly in the empty space. Like a reflex, his hands came to rest against your skirted hips. His fingertips brushed the felted material as you stared down, challenging him.

You split the two sides of your shirt and slid it over and off your smooth shoulders. Without so much as a breath, Theo leaned forward and pressed his lips to the skin there. You gave a light gasp at his action. Your rapid heartbeat danced against his tongue as he ran it along the expanse of your neck.

You pushed him back against the headboard. You pulled your hands up to the clip pressed tightly against your chest. Your fingers curled around it and—

Theo’s eyes opened. The sun was up and Mattheo was squatted beside his bed, watching him with an obnoxious smirk printed on his face. Theo jumped back at the sudden face in front of him. He leaned up and glanced around wildly, trying to gather his bearings, ignoring Mattheo’s annoying cackling beside him.

“Dude, what the hell?” Mattheo laughed.

“What? Shut the fuck up,” he grumbled, pushing him back away from the bed.

“Oh, baby,” Mattheo moaned in a high-pitched voice. “Come here, darling. Let me—”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Theo asked.

“You must have been having one hell of a dream, man,” he laughed, “when I got in here, you were saying all kinds of stuff.”

Theo blushed deeply, his nose and ears burning, as he remembered the subject of his dream. Flashes of your thick hips and chest pressed against him and his hands and lips on you and…fuck.

“Shit, man, who were you dreaming about? You’re as red as an apple,” Mattheo asked, an eyebrow arching. Theo didn’t reply. Mattheo’s eyes widened.

“Oh my god, you weren’t dreaming about—?”

“How about some breakfast?” Theo interrupted, abruptly pulling the covers back and slipping a tee shirt over his head.

Part 4!

#fanfiction #creative writing #fanfic #writing #harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #reader insert #slytherin #harry potter smut #chapter 3 #theodore nott x reader #theodore nott #theo nott #lorenzo berkshire #enzo berkshire #mattheo riddle #pansy parkinson #fem reader #animagus

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flowence-writing · 5 months

Note

hi! could you write a Johanna x fem!reader fic where the reader is a tribute from district 11? She won the 69th games when she was 12-14, and during her game, she became very close friends with an older tribute from District 5 (they were like Rue and Katniss). the older tribute died for reader.

Johanna and reader know each other from the few years where they had been dragged to the capitol to "mentor" for the games. they became very close.

when reader was also reaped for the quarter quell, johanna was there to comfort her as soon as she could.

johanna and reader protect each other in the arena, and reader gets captured by the capitol instead of johanna.

afraid to love you - j.m.

pairings: johanna mason x reader (romantic), platonic katniss everdeen x reader, platonic finnick odair x reader, platonic peeta mellark x reader

summary: Johanna Mason loved you, she loved how passionate you are and how kind and caring you are. When you got dragged to the capital to mentor the tributes a few times, at first you hated Johanna, but then you grew to love her. What happens when in the quarter quell of the 75th hunger games you’re captured by the capital and Johanna is left alone in District 13?

a/n: i changed some things ^^

warnings: graphic volence, graphic torture, angst, some fluff

You hated this, hated the unknown of it all. A part of you was glad that it had been you and not Johanna. At least you were semi liked by the capital so they would not kill you at least. You sighed, you’ve been unable to close your eyes ever since you woke up here, in this disgustingly bright white room.

“Are you Y/N L/N?” A man in a white coat and a badge asked, walking into the room with an air of confidence. You scowled at the man. You didn’t answer his question.

“It would be better for you to answer my questions. Are you Y/N L/N?” He repeated the previous question. You grit your teeth, still not saying a word.

“Alright then, you’ll learn to talk eventually.” He said, his hand hovering over the plethora of tools in front of him. You looked at him in silent horror, a plea in your eyes but nonetheless that did not stop the man from picking up tweezers and placing them under your first finger nail.

CRACK!

You closed your eyes tightly, biting your lip to stifle your scream. The man chuckled at you. Muttering something about how you’ll start screaming soon.

He went to your other finger nail. Ripping the nail out of its nailbed, you groaned but the scream was muffled back down your throat again.

You started to lose track of time, the hours seemingly endless and the torture nonstop. He’d ask the same questions, while taking each nail he could.

“Are you Y/N L/N?”

“Where are the rebels hiding?”

“Were you in on the plan?”

“Who is the leader of the rebels?”

Over and over and over again.

You don’t know when you started screaming or when your voice became hoarse. The lights beginning to truly make your eyes hurt.

The man decided eventually to move onto another type of torture. He put a rag over your head, and then came the water.

You weren’t expecting this, you weren’t expecting to be waterboarded. The water seems to be endless, soaking into your nostrils, your mouth, and your eyes. You gagged, choking on the water and coughing but having no break with it. Water getting into your lungs causing your chest to heave painfully.

You don’t know when you passed out or if you ever did. Time became nothing more than torturous. Tick tock, the clock would go, you supposed the clock is there to make you feel insane.

When that wasn’t enough they’d inject something into your veins, it made you scream and writhe in your bounds. It felt like your bones were on fire, like your stomach acid is burning through your fat, skin, and muscle.

Sometimes you would get a hallucinogen. You’d see Johanna, but it wasn’t her. She’d come to save you, hold you, and then you would wake crying.

“Oh my god…” You heard her, you heard Johanna. Unsure if this is just a trick or hallucination you cracked your eyelids open. When did you get here? It wasn’t as bright, it definitely was not the capital.

You wriggled a bit, bringing your hand to your face. You gazed unsurely at your own hand, unsure if this is real. Your eyes shifted to Johanna’s figure, you didn’t feel anything, not relief, not happiness. You’ve been through this too many times to get hopeful only to have everything ripped away the next second.

“You’re not real. You’re not real, you’re not real, you’re not real.” You chanted over and over again, shaking your head you refused to believe this was real. Too many times you had the hope, had Johanna, ripped away from your grasp.

“Dove?” You shook your head again, tears stinging at your eyes.

“It’s me, I.. I’m real. I swear.” This was different, the hallucinations never demanded that they were real. A spark of hope fired into your chest.

“Jo?” You replied tearfully, hopefully even. You sounded so unsure that it broke Johanna’s heart. You then spotted Katniss and Finnick behind Johanna. A sob broke through your pale cracked lips.

You were muttering incomprehensible words to yourself, rocking back and forth.

“It’s me, they can’t hurt you anymore. I won’t let them.” Johanna murmured, stepping to your bedside. You looked up, tears streaming down your cheeks, raw emotion in your eyes. You tentatively reached out to her, to Johanna.

Johanna took the hand that had shakenly been moving towards her. She brought your hand to her lips kissing it.

“This is real…” You muttered in disbelief. Jo finally let a few tears fall.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry… I tried to get you three back sooner. I am so sorry.” Katniss said, her voice cracking. You looked up at the woman, a woman so brave for someone who’s just a kid.

“It’s ok. They didn’t break me.” You said, albeit emotionally but you’re not hundred percent ok right not and that’s fine.

The five of you huddled into a hug. Peeta somehow snuck into the hug as well. and you all laughed, you were all together again. You might never be the same but at least you were alive and had everything you needed.

#johanna mason x reader #johanna mason #the hunger games #the hunger games x reader #finnick odair #katniss everdeen #jena malone

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