#j jonah jameson seems like the kind of guy who would go to work while having a heart attack and just work through it

[miskatebishop]

peter parker has internalised arachnophobia, in this essay i will-

#this post has a target audience and that target audience is me and the-real-peter-parker #peter coming to work with a note from his therapist that just says: this guy suffers from internalised arachnophobia #just to get jj jameson to stop yelling at him every other second #while j jonah jameson is like 'well here at the daily bugle we don't believe in weaknesses' #j jonah jameson seems like the kind of guy who would go to work while having a heart attack and just work through it #marvel #peter parker #spiderman #spider-man #mcu #marvel comics

[hypnoticwinter]

Down the Rabbit Hole part 3

When I wake up it's blazingly bright outside and I feel like death. It takes me a couple of moments to realize that my phone is ringing and without looking I reach for it, feel on the side for the power button, flip it around so it's right side up and then swipe to answer it. "Hello?" I croak and I almost laugh at myself, at how awful I sound. Whoever's on the line is going to think I'm super hungover. That'd be my assumption at least, I –

"Miss Dzilenski, where are you?"

Shit.

"Hi, Jim," I tell my editor. I hear him sigh.

"It's two in the afternoon, Roan," he starts. That gets me to perk my ears up.

"Is it? Fuck."

"Roan –"

"God," I groan, rolling over. I bump my foot on the edge of the bedframe. "Ow."

"Where are you?"

I think about lying for a moment then decide against it. "I'm in Gumption," I say, and at least it makes him shut up for a second.

"What the hell are you doing in Gumption? Did I tell you to go to Gumption?"

I hold the phone a little away from my ear. "Alright, Jim," I tell him. "You can drop the J. Jonah Jameson act, I get it."

"Did you at least send in that piece on the water plant downtown? I have that slated for –"

"I haven't even worked on it."

I can hear his blood pressure rising from over the phone. He's going to start making a little whistling sound soon. Steam will be coming out of his ears. "Alright. I've given you too many second chances as it is," he tells me. "If you aren't going to take this job seriously and at least show up on time and pretend to work on what you're supposed to, you can go work somewhere else."

"Okay."

"And don't even think about giving my name as a reference – wait, what?"

"I said okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay as in I quit, Jim," I tell him. I can feel myself getting mad but I stuff it back down.

“You quit! You quit? After all the things I’ve done for you, you just turn around and - !”

I hear Jim splutter for a moment, and then he takes a deep breath. When he speaks again he sounds much more in control of himself. "Roan," he says. I can hear him turning around in his office chair, hunching down so he can feel conspiratorial. There's a lump building in my throat but I ignore it. "What's going on? Are you okay? Are you –"

“I’m fine,” I say.

“Don’t bullshit me,” he says. “I know there’s something going on, you were acting strange on Friday, don’t try to deny it. Tell me what’s going on.”

“Jim, there’s nothing going on.”

“Roan, I’m trying to help you.”

With a deliberate effort I unclench my jaw. Fuck it, I think to myself. "I have HIV, Jim."

His reaction is amusing. Shock first, then sympathy, then rationalizing. "Oh fuck, Roan," he says, "I'm so sorry. Are you doing okay? Do you need any – wait a minute."

"What?"

"Roan, you haven't, I don't know, given up, have you? HIV isn't a death sentence any more, it's not the 80s, there are drugs –"

I can't help it, I laugh. I imagine I must sound pretty insane over the phone to him but it just bursts out of me and then comes pouring out until I'm done. He tries to talk, to get me to stop, but I can't, I can't stop myself.

"Roan," he says finally, when I'm done and I'm taking little gasping breaths that turn into sobs and I feel the tears roiling in my eyes and I ball my fist and hit myself hard in the thigh, cause I'd promised, I'd promised myself I wouldn't cry over this, goddam it – "Roan," he says, "what is it? You don't have AIDS, you're okay. You have insurance, we can figure something out."

"You don't – you don't understand," I tell him. "You remember that time six months ago when I had to go to the hospital?"

"Yeah," he says, confused, "but you were okay, you got a clean bill of health."

"It was a viral infection," I tell him. "And they gave me an antiviral drug to try and treat it, the same one you use to control HIV. Or no, not an antiviral, an antiretroviral, whatever the hell the difference is. Makes the virus inactive but doesn't kill it, because that was too dangerous or something. Fuck, I wish I'd paid more attention when the doctor was explaining it to me."

"And?" he asks. He's getting impatient. Why shouldn't he be? I've held up his day – hell, his life, enough with my bullshit.

"And I went into anaphylactic shock," I tell him. "I'm allergic to it. They had to give me epinephrine and adrenaline and all that shit. It was a near thing. I never told anybody cause I didn't want you guys to worry. But then I started worrying, so I went to the doctor and got myself tested, you know, just in case..."

I can hear him processing that for a moment. "Oh, shit," he says finally.

"Yeah," I say. I wipe my eyes. "So you're wrong," I tell him, "it's a death sentence for me."

"There has to be something –"

"There's not. I got the results back on Thursday. Positive."

"I knew something was wrong, you were acting so differently on Friday. Who'd you get it from? Did you tell –"

"You know who I got it from. And yeah, I called already. Don't worry about it."

"Wait, what are you doing in Gumption, anyway? That's..." I hear him clicking around. "Almost five hundred miles away. What, did you take a plane?"

"Yeah, caught one on Friday."

"Why?"

"I'm investigating. I've got a story."

"Roan," he starts. Something in his tone presses on a weak spot somewhere deep inside of me that has been bending and bending and snaps it.

"Fuck," I growl. He starts to say something then stops. I throw the phone onto the bed. "Fuck!" I scream. It sounds tinny and pathetic, even to my own ears. I want to break something, I want to punch someone. I look at the mirror on the wall and think about it and then scream again, a pathetic, wordless cry of rage. Then I see myself and I stop. I meet my reflection's gaze and then look away. Jim is saying something, his voice a tiny, scratchy creak from where I threw my phone, but I don't care. The anger is slipping out of me.

I look down at my hands and they're shaking. I let my lip curl, then I go back to the bed and pick up the phone again. "Hi," I say after a moment, not thinking of anything better.

"Needed that?" he asks.

"Yeah," I breathe.

"You should come back. We'll figure this out. There's plenty we'll be able to work out."

"No," I tell him. I don't actually think about it at all, I just say it. Zero conscious effort.

"No?" he asks, sounding genuinely confused. "Roan, why the hell not?"

"I'm working on a story," I tell him again.

"What the hell kind of story? If you're in Gumption it's got to be about Mystery Flesh Pit, right?"

"You've heard of it?"

"Of course I've heard of it. Me and my ex-wife went there on our honeymoon. Nice place but a little creepy. Ancient history now, though."

"Oh," I say, feeling a little disappointed. "I'd only just heard of it."

"Roan," he says again, in that gentle little voice that I hate so much, "just come back. Do you need money for a plane ticket? I can –"

"Fuck," I mutter again.

"What is it?"

"Forget it, Jim. Forget I called, forget I said anything, forget I fucking worked at the paper," I tell him. I start to say something, then I stop, shake my head. "I get up every day and I don't do anything meaningful, I'm twenty-six years old and everybody has always told me how much potential I have, how lucky I am that I graduated from a good school and got a job doing something I love and now, now that I know I'm going to die –"

"You were always going to die," he points out.

"Shut the fuck up!" I hiss. "Now that I know I'm going to die, it means nothing, it doesn't matter, I'm nobody, I've done nothing, nothing I do from now on will ever be enough to mean anything."

"That isn't true."

"Yeah, it is. What have I done that's made a lasting impression on – on anything?"

Jim is silent for a moment. I hear him take a breath and blow it out. "When I got divorced," he says finally, "you were the only person at the paper who noticed anything was wrong, and when you followed me when I got off of work that day, you saved my life."

I laugh, then let it trail off when he doesn't join in. "You're serious, aren't you?" I ask.

"Yeah," he grunts. "I was going back home and I was probably going to drink a lot more than I should have, and, you know, getting drunk won't make you happier, it won't change how you feel, it just amplifies it. And I felt like shit. And if I went home by myself I would have just kept drinking and then I really think I would have shot myself. But you made me go to a bar with you and you cut me off after a while and when I got home things didn't seem quite so bad."

I start to say something, then stop myself.

"Anyway," he says, a hint of his usual gruffness creeping back into his voice, "you've made an impact in my life, at least."

"That's why you've given me all those second chances, isn't it?" I ask him. He laughs.

"Yeah," he says. "And because, you know...you aren't actually that much of a burden."

I snort. "Yeah," I say, "right."

"I'm serious."

"Jim, I'm gonna go."

"Come back. We'll sort this."

"Let me do what I have to."

"What do you have to do?" he barks. "Do you even know? Are you just saying that to get me off your back?"

I actually do laugh at that one. "Yeah," I tell him. "Yeah, I am."

"Alright, well...I want to at least see you before you die, if that's what you're so fucking convinced is your fate now."

"You're not treating the invalid very kindly."

"Shut up. I'm giving you a week off with pay, do with it what you will. Tracy and Mike will pick up your column, so don't worry about it."

"You already asked them?"

"I'm the boss, I don't have to ask them. Get your head screwed on straight. Call me as soon as you're back in town."

"Okay, dad."

"Shut up. Take care of yourself."

I'm smiling, even though I don't want to be. "Yeah, alright. You too, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. Don't worry about me. Call if you need anything."

"Thanks." I wait for a moment, then shrug to myself. "I'm sorry I probably fucked up your deadlines for today."

"Don't even worry about it," he tells me. I can practically see him waving his hand magnanimously. "It's not like anybody reads the paper any more anyway."

"See you."

"Take care."

Click and a dial tone. I get up from the bed and stretch, then get naked. I turn the shower on cold and light a cigarette, watch the smoke spiral up into the fan vent on the ceiling. When it gets wet I light another, and then another.

 * * *

 "You know," Peter says, glancing up at me, "I really didn't think you were actually going to bring dinner."

"What, you thought I'd forget?" I ask him, leaning forward and snatching a fry from the pile next to his elbow. He glares at me and shields them with his hands.

"I said you could have one fry."

"I bought the food, I get as many fries as I want."

"You bought it for me."

"Yeah, you're just borrowing it."

"This is loaned food? When do you want it back?"

He starts making retching noises at me and I cover my ears, make a face at him. "Stop it or I really will throw up," I tell him, "and then you'll have to clean it."

The 7-11 is as empty as Peter had promised, so empty that he's the only employee in the store. I can't stop looking at him and shaking my head in bewilderment and after a while he makes a face at me and asks what my problem is.

"I just still can't quite believe it," I explain, sneaking another fry.

"You could have gotten your own fries."

"When it's during the daytime," I say, ignoring him, taking another drink from my ridiculously large cup of Sprite, "none of this seems like it's real. Like, I look at you and I don't see the same guy I was talking to last night at three in the morning. It all seemed so serious, so life-and-death then, but now it's like, I don't know. Life goes on."

"Everything that's there in the dark is still there in the light."

"Yeah."

“I really am sorry for - you know…”

I give him a wary look. “Well, just don’t do it again and we’ll be fine.”

Peter nods. He seems a little embarrassed about it. He takes another bite of his hamburger and I shake my head at myself. This man had a gun on me last night and I just walked in here with food for him? What the hell are you doing, Roan?

"Thank you for dinner, by the way," he says, and I glance up at him.

"I figured you might want a break from 7-11 food."

"First rule of working at a place that serves food," he tells me, grinning a little. "Don't eat the food."

I laugh at that one. "Alright, fair point."

"I get what you mean," he says after a moment, "about it not feeling real."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. It's been a long time since I've, you know, actually been down there. Sometimes I forget what it's – what it's really like."

I reach down into my bag and take out the voice recorder, place it on the counter. He stares at it. "I won't record if you don't want me to," I say gently. His eyes flick up to mine.

"You realize," he says after a moment, "that whatever I tell you, if you ever publish it, if you ever put it out there – they'll get you for it."

"I'm willing to take that risk."

"I mean it. When you were doing your research, did you see any accounts by survivors? By rangers and park staff? Of the disaster, I mean."

"A couple," I say. "But they were..."

"Yes?"

"Unsatisfying," I finish, shrugging. He laughs.

"Unsatisfying. That's a word for it."

"Are you suggesting they were paid off? Or threatened?" I ask, clicking the voice recorder on. He looks at the tiny blinking red light, then back at me.

"Paid off, scared into silence, threatened, I don't know. Maybe a combination of the three."

"How do you know?"

"They did it with everybody. They did it with me; every ranger I know of got offered a very nice pension if they signed an NDA that had some...unusual stipulations in it."

"Like what?"

"It was just...very specific. Very far-reaching. And as far as I'm aware most NDAs out there don't make any vague threats to your friends or family."

"Are you serious?"

"Lady," he says, spreading his arms, giving me a disbelieving little smile, "after everything you've seen, you think I'm making any of this up?"

"I'm just trying to – I'm sorry, I don't want to imply that I don't believe you, it's just that, you know..."

"It's a little extreme. Yeah, I know."

"Did you sign it?"

"Didn't really give me a choice."

"I'm pretty sure that's illegal."

"Well, I mean, they gave me a choice – either sign it and get some hush money and live a nice, peaceful, quiet life, or don't sign it and live with the paranoia. There are a couple of online forum type sites for ex-rangers and park staff that I used to frequent and one of the guys there, someone I knew, actually, he didn't sign it."

"And?"

"You ever heard of gangstalking?"

"I haven't."

He reaches up, massages his chin through his beard. A nervous tic or something. Outside on the road a car trundles past and we both watch it go by. "The thing about it was, it would have been hard to prove that it was something organized. He started posting in kind of a diary format, every day at around seven or eight in the evening. He lived in, uh, I think Missouri, one of those states up north, so it was a way different climate but the same time zone. He said that he'd see people watching him, different people every time, although after a while he thought it might have been the same group of eight or so people wearing different outfits, wigs, things like that. He'd notice them staring at him if he turned around quickly, or he'd see a strange car he'd never seen before parked opposite his house."

"How credible was he?"

"When I worked with him I'd have trusted anything he told me."

"And afterwards?"

"How do you mean?"

"You said 'when you worked with him.' Does that mean you wouldn't have trusted him once you weren't working together any more?"

"I think that something must have been going on. I don't know for sure. He got erratic very quickly once he started posting about it, he wasn't getting enough sleep, he'd see ghosts everywhere."

"Sounds like he was paranoid."

"Paranoia's only paranoia if it's unfounded."

"How does that story end?"

"Two weeks after, he got hit by a car. Died on the way to the hospital."

“Hit and run?” I ask. Peter nods.

“They never found the guy who did it.”

"Could have been a coincidence."

"The idea is that that’s what you're supposed to think that."

I blow a breath out. His eyes flash.

"I told you you'd regret staying," he tells me, and I roll my eyes at him.

"In for a penny, in for a pound," I assure him. "And even if I can't use this in a story," I say, tapping the recorder, "who knows what things will be like in ten years? In twenty?"

"You're going to sit on it for that long?"

"Well, I –" I start, and then stop. He looks at me strangely. Of course I was going to say something like 'well, I’ll be dead but whoever I give my data to might' but I don't want to open up another can of worms. "I don't know," I finish, lamely, and we both know I'm not giving him the full truth, but he doesn't press me.

Peter looks like he's in his early to mid thirties but I haven't asked him his age. We've kept things pleasantly anonymous so far, which we both seemed to agree was the best way to do things. I don't know his family name; he doesn't know my name at all.

I can tell from the way he looks at me that he still thinks I don't know what I'm getting myself into. Sure, he might have a point, but I think I've at least demonstrated my resolve by now.

"Look, whatever," he says, taking another bite of the hamburger I got him. He wipes his upper lip with his thumb, still holding the burger. "I just want to make sure you know what you're getting into."

"I know."

"So what do you want to know?" he asks me. "Where do you want to start?"

"Start at the beginning," I suggest. So he does.

 * * *

 Peter got hired at the Mystery Flesh Pit in the middle of 1999, right after several other rangers had quit and they were offering incentives for transfers from other parks. Previously he'd been working with the Outward Bound group in the Boundary Waters in Minnesota, where he'd gone to school, and although the hiring call was mainly interested in other, experienced rangers, Peter caught their attention because he'd been present as an assistant guide when a previous Outward Bound group went through the Mystery Flesh Pit, with special permission from the park administration, a rather historic first for both organizations. Prior to this, the largest expedition groups that had gone through the Mystery Flesh Pit together were some of the initial mining teams that explored it back in the 70s.

The Outward Bound excursion had gone relatively uneventfully, with the exception of one cell of the 20-strong group picking a bad place to camp one night and nearly drowning inside their tents when a flood of gastric juices submerged them and began leaking in through a patch in the side of the tent that later proved to have been made using thread that wasn't acid-resistant. Although the three boys and the one counselor inside the tent weren't killed, they suffered acid burns on close to seventy percent of their bodies that required emergency evacuation to the medical center in the Lower Visitor Center, which, Peter explained, was a relatively rare occurrence. From there, the four injured members of the group were taken to the local hospital and treated, while the rest of the group continued on their excursion without any further issues. Peter had been one of the first members of the group to respond to the calls for help from the trapped cell, and had cut the tent open and assisted the guide ranger present in lifting the four people inside to safety, and it was this connection, and more specifically, this immediate willingness to put himself in harm's way to save others, that Peter claimed was the deciding factor in his application.

Although he started out with fairly mundane work at the Flesh Pit, leading tour groups and manning desks in the Visitor Center, specifically, his skill with bushcraft – or whatever the hell the word ought to be for the Pit - lead to a rapid series of promotions until he was one of a tight-knit crew of patrol rangers who would venture far beyond the relative safety of the lighted and fenced walking trails to respond to calls of distress, reports of animal or fungal activity, and in a few rare cases, fugitives reported to be hiding somewhere within the pit. Like most National Parks, Peter explained, Mystery Flesh Pit was big, and the sheer scale of it wasn't obvious until you'd been down inside of it, due to the majority of it being covered by the earth, and the top-side area of the park being relatively small compared to the underground bulk of it. Just like other National Parks, it was a vast area of relatively undisturbed and unobserved wilderness, which meant that, for criminals with strong stomachs, it was a good place to hide out. Although, he admitted, they retrieved far more of these criminals dead than alive. Some of them, he mentioned, they were never able to retrieve at all.

"What are the main hazards, down there in the Pit?" I asked him, and he shook his head and blew his breath out, then started to count on his fingers. One, dehydration, since the air in there is thick and humid and will leach the moisture out of you if you aren't wearing a closed-circuit suit. Two, digestion, since it's incredibly easy to slip and fall into one of the numerous sacs, gullets, craws, or other redundant and often inexplicable digestive organs dotted throughout the Pit, and although a ranger suit is acid-resistant it isn't acid-proof. If you're quick enough you might be able to piton your way out before you and everything on you becomes far too slippery for use, and then if that happens you'd better radio for help and pray someone gets to you fast. Double this risk if you're exploring somewhere there aren't maps, or where the maps are outdated. Most of the organs, he said, close to the Visitor Center, for perhaps a five-mile radius, are marked and blocked off, but those coverings can be damaged, or new ones can grow, given enough time. And if you go beyond that...

"There be monsters," I suggested.

He laughed. "That's number three," he told me. For the Pit is home to a vast menagerie of extremely strange creatures, invertebrate and vertebrate alike, which can be found in no other place. He tells me about things like the abyssal copepod, a gigantic crustacean roughly the size of an elephant, which can be found slithering and scraping in the deepest recesses of the Pit, some ancient off-shoot of the ordinary ocean-going copepod line, which normally is so small that it can't be seen with the naked eye. He lists off a dozen creatures with strange, suggestive names that call fantastic images and assumptions to my mind, things like a venous shamble, a ballast siren, a cloistropod, an amorphous shame. Some of these, like the copepods and the macrobacteria, I'd read of on Wikipedia, when I'd done my initial research on the Pit, but others are alien to me.

Most of these things, he tells me, although relatively large – Pit gigantism was a well-studied and observed phenomenon – were shy, retiring creatures, opportunistic feeders and scavengers, preying on terrene wildlife unfortunate enough to stumble into the Pit. Although, he corrects himself, some are helped to stumble. I frown at that and ask him what he means, and he tells me that some of the larger creatures migrate through the Pit in cycles related to breeding or to the phase of the moon, although how they can possibly tell what phase the moon is in from down in the Pit's guts, he can't say. And some of the larger, more aggressive ones, the copepods and the shambles and something that he refers to only as a 'leechman' (and waves away my question as to what the hell a leechman might be), they do sometimes venture up to the surface and pull things in.

I sat there and processed that for a while and then asked the obvious question: "But why the hell did you let them? There's only the one entrance to the Pit and there must be so many eyes on it..." I started, and then trailed off, for the obvious answer occurred to me, and he saw the look on my face and nodded.

"What I'm about to tell you," he said to me, "you cannot tell anyone. It’s not something They want people to know."

"But what's so odd about it having –"

"Of course it isn't odd that there's more than one orifice. That's a given. Who knows how many more are buried beneath miles of rock? Who knows the shape of the thing down there?" he said, pointing down at the floor. Without even really thinking about it I flexed my feet through my high-tops; the ground felt solid, unyielding. "What They don't want anybody knowing," he said, leaning in a little to me, "is where those orifices are. How far they are from the fence around the Pit."

I felt an indescribable knot of dread clench inside my stomach. I was confronting something I had already known, something I had suspected but had been unwilling to put a conscious voice to, even inside my own head.

"Miles," he whispered. "Dozens of miles. Almost eighty, the furthest one we know about."

"Eighty miles," I murmured, thinking of it. "It must be huge, enormous; it must –"

"There are containment buildings around each one, disguised as warehouses, construction sites, power plants, things like that. In the 70s they tried to seal them up but..."

"But what?"

"Let's just say it – the Pit – didn't like that."

I frowned. "But I never read anything about –"

"This was back in the 70s. They kept a tighter grip on things. When they integrated with the National Park Service, there was a lot less of that. You can't keep as much information hidden in a huge bureaucracy like that – unless it's something really serious, of course. Like, say, what happened on July 4th. This event in the 70s, it was way less tough. Nobody died, nobody got hurt, but people, especially people in leadership positions, they got scared. Took steps to make sure it wouldn't happen again."

I guess we know how that turned out.

He told me the whole story, his story, not that of the park, not really. They touch and intersect and intermingle but I got much more of a sense of his relationship with it, with the park, with the people he worked with, with the gigantic animal that made up its walls and caverns, than just a history lesson with dry facts repeated on end until I was bored to tears. He told me of the terrible things he'd seen and on some occasions of the terrible things he'd done; of the time when he found a man with his leg gnawed off by a venous shamble, a slithering, snakelike, hissing thing that only attacks when cornered and otherwise lurks in the shadows of arterioles and veins, darting out to snatch a wayward macrobacterium or lesser copepod from time to time. He told me of the terrible fear and sickness he'd felt, watching the poor man, an unhealthy-looking fellow in his fifties in a gaudy rented tourists' suit, moaning weakly while the shamble had probed the ripped mess of his thigh with its feeding tubules, drawing forth gobbets of still-living flesh with a horrible sucking sound that Peter confessed haunted him late at night sometimes. He'd drawn his service pistol and put five bullets into the shamble before it had retreated and had had to force himself not to put a sixth into the man.

He told me of a time where he and a colleague had pursued a rapist from a ballast bulb down into a service access that opened into the raw, wet, pink wilderness of the Pit. Ordinarily it was sealed and locked but they had been doing maintenance on it and it was left shut but unlocked, and the rapist had gotten it unsealed and vanished into the darkness with no equipment, no light, no nothing. He had slipped on the helmet to his suit and gotten ready to pursue the man, but his colleague, his direct superior, a short, fiery head ranger he referred to only as Makado, had stopped him, and held his gaze with her steely eyes while she reached out and sealed the maintenance hatch, trapping the man out there, and then called on the general channel on the radio, instructing all the maintenance teams to double-check whatever hatches they'd used when they got back in. The rapist was never seen again.

"What's ballast?" I asked him when he was through with that story. He looked at me with a clever but curiously earnest gaze, as though he wanted my approval. He wanted, I realized belatedly, for me to tell him he'd done the right thing. He must have never told anybody this story before. And for good reason, since his inaction made him an accessory to murder. By this point it was seven at night, and I'd replaced the SD card in my voice recorder already. I had no judgment in me. I looked at him with wide, careful eyes, and an understanding passed between us, but I don't know if he understood what I understood.

Ballast, he told me, was a substance produced by the creature, by the Permian Basin Superorganism, a sort of magical panacea that the eggheads, in his words, thought was related to the thing's endocrine system and was involved in balancing its hormones. In humans, though, it partially reversed the effects of aging, provided an energy boost, had curative properties, and was a fearsomely powerful aphrodisiac. He told me of the ballast bulbs, vast pools of the stuff, secreted through whatever process, taken and pumped upwards into watered-down pools of it, a large infinity-pool at 5% concentration, and then progressively cozier ones with higher percentages, marketed as adult-only.

I’d seen references to this feature when I was doing my research but I hadn’t really believed it.

"There's no way the government was down with that," I told him, but he'd shrugged, said that it had been the main draw to the place back in the Anodyne days, that once the NPS took over they'd tried to de-emphasize and phase out that attraction but the pushback had been so uniform, widespread, and aggressive that the Powers That Be had eventually thrown up their hands and said 'alright, you damn monkeys, you want your aphrodisiac pools and anonymous sexual encounters? Fine! Don't get cum in the pool filters!'

His words, not mine. I asked if they still took the ballast out of the thing and sold it and he shrugged, said he thought they did but in much smaller volumes than in the past.

"Was it always just for medical purposes or did they, you know...could I like, go down to the store and buy a thing of ballast?"

"No," he shook his head, "it wasn't quite like that. They did put it in certain products though, seasonal stuff...did you ever have a Coke Heartthrob?"

My mouth fell open and then I shut it while I tried to think of how to answer that question. I saw his eyes dart down to my cheeks as I felt them start to prickle and he had the grace to blush as well and look away from me. "I'm sorry," he said awkwardly, "I didn't mean to...bring up memories."

I'd lost my virginity due in part to a Coke Heartthrob. I hadn't thought of it in years, ever since they'd discontinued it. I never knew why. I never knew what they put in it. I remember googling "when did coke get rid of heartthrob" at some point in 2009 and found out that 2007 was the last year they'd had it for sale. I went around feeling oddly nostalgic and disappointed for a couple of days until I forgot about it; I'd never known...

Whenever I thought of it I thought of the warm, fuzzy rush it gave me, not enough for any major high or anything but just a pleasant rush of pins and needles all down my body in waves, converging on my groin, turning into a vague heat and then into a throb along with my heartbeat. It certainly made me more...uninhibited, back then, seventeen, after school in the chorus room, that first time. Maybe he'd known what it would do to me, but I certainly hadn't, and even if I had I wouldn't have felt taken advantage of. He didn't have to buy me a Coke to get me eager the second or the third time. Or the fourth. Or the fifth, sixth, seventh...

I shook my head. “Curative properties,” I said. “What does that mean?”

“Miracle healing, they called it in the old days,” he said. “Some of that was exaggeration, but some of it wasn’t. Promotes cellular regeneration, as far as I’m aware, which is why it helps with aging. The aphrodisiac effect is actually just a byproduct.”

“Cellular regeneration,” I muttered. “So it could help you…regrow a lost limb?”

“I don’t know, maybe. They tested it but I’ve never heard a story about someone growing back a finger or an arm or something like that.”

I gave him a little grunt. I’d have to come at this obliquely so it isn’t obvious what my interest is. “What about diseases?” I asked. “Something like…I don’t know, polio, or HIV?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know,” he said. “I was just a ranger. Maybe it could have, but I’m not sure.”

Well. A maybe is better than a no. This man is in the business of sneaking people into the Pit, maybe he could get me in as well. And if I were able to dodge the wildlife and not get - get eaten, either by the creatures or the surroundings, maybe I could…

Peter said something and disrupted my train of thought. I blinked at him and asked him what it was, and he said that my phone was ringing and, sure enough, when I actually paid attention to it I heard it vibrating in the front pocket of my jeans. I pulled it out just in time to miss the call; my dad, trying to call me back. I stared at it then put it back in my pocket, returned my attention to Peter.

"Did you need to take that?"

"No," I assured him. "Please, continue."

The Pit wasn't horrible. He made very sure to stress that to me. It was the best place he'd ever worked, something more than a job, more like a calling. He felt at home in the bronchial canals and the tubules and ventricles and aortas and what the hell ever else the thing has down there. There was, he explained, a scenic beauty to it equal to the likes of the mountains of Colorado or the Black Hills or the Badlands, or the endless forests of Minnesota, just a different sort of beauty, one that wasn't eager to share itself with the casual observer. The ordinary person, he explained, goes down the Flesh Pit expecting a horror show, wanting to be disgusted, to be terrified, to treat it like a thrill ride at a carnival. They can't get out of that mindset and everything seems horrible to them, from an innocuous herd of macrobacteria trampling along outside a fenced-off path to their habitual feeding ground, to a vast air-filled bladder with calcium deposits like stalagmites crenellating inwards like the spikes on an iron maiden.

"If you made up your mind before you went and saw it," he told me, "if you didn't even try to appreciate the Pit for what it is, you'd never come back. You'd go once and be grossed out and you wouldn't get what the fuss was about. But it can...it can touch you. It's the last wilderness on Earth," he asserted, a far-off, dreamy look in his eyes. While he's talking about the Pit he doesn't look nearly as tired and worn-down and dreary as he does normally. Something about it still animates him, fuels his sense of wonder. While he talks I find myself pondering, briefly, whether or not there's anything at all in my life I'm that passionate about.

He's halfway through telling me about a chyme deposit he found once ("what's chyme?" I ask; "half-digested food," he tells me. I almost make a face but I remember what he told me about going into the pit with preconceived notions and control myself) that had transformed over what must have been months in a digestive gland from a pile of deer carcasses into a pile of delicate, frilly, ribbon-like, waxy material that crumbled to dust when he touched it. Indigestion, Makado had explained when he told her about it, but something about its delicacy, about its uniformly rich creamy color, a symbol, at least in his mind, of purity amid the rugged, flesh-toned, vein-scored surroundings of the Pit, had touched him deeply.

My recorder makes a beeping noise to tell me that the third SD card is full. I check my bag; I have two left. Peter stretches, smiles at me.

"I need a smoke," he says, nodding towards the door. "Let's take a break."

We take a break.

 * * *

 I'm only on my second cigarette when the car pulls up. Peter's still on his first. The sun is cracking like an egg, bleeding over the hills that backdrop the town and casting warm orange light on both of our faces. The car drives up slowly, a big black SUV, looking better maintained than any of the other cars I've seen in town. No giant rust spots, no dents, no bumps, not even a burned-out headlight. It's dark enough that I can't make out who's driving. They pull crosswise along three spaces, horizontal to us, and roll down the passenger window.

Inside is a small, fragile-looking woman, maybe around thirty-five or forty. Her face is lined but still fair and her hair is long and black. Dark eyes, severe mouth. "Hello Peter," she says, her eyes flicking over to me. "Who's your friend?"

"My name's Roan," I tell her before Peter can answer. "Who's asking?"

She smiles at me faintly. "Erica Walken," she says, as though it ought to mean something to me. I stare back at her, take special care not to move my facial muscles an inch. I let the silence stretch out and when I feel it ought to snap I nod at her.

"Good to meet you," I say.

Peter shifts next to me. He's uncomfortable. Obviously he knows Erica. She turns her attention to him and I sneak a glance at him out of the corner of my eye under the pretense of taking a drag of my cigarette and meet his eyes as he sneaks a glance at me. He looks away quickly but not before giving me a tiny, almost imperceptible shake of his head.

"I'm not interrupting anything, am I?" Erica asks.

"No," Peter says quickly, stepping forward, closer to her car. "Roan was just waiting for a ride."

"Oh, do you need a ride? I wouldn't mind dropping you off somewhere," Erica suggests, smiling at me. It isn't a malicious smile but I've found that the people who mean to do you harm rarely tell you they're going to do so. There's a prickle at the base of my stomach, a fragment of worry that I've learned to listen to. I shake my head.

"My mom always warned me about taking rides with strangers," I tell Erica, keeping my tone neutral.

"Suit yourself," she says, without even an ounce of attitude. Her eyes flick like roulette balls, fix on Peter. "Can we have a chat?" she asks him.

"Sure," he says, leaning in the window.

"Alone," she clarifies.

I roll my eyes at the theatrics, put the cigarette out in the ashcan. "I'll be inside," I tell Peter, and force myself not to glance back even though I can feel two sets of eyes on me as I traipse in the 7-11, let the door bang shut behind me.

Their conversation doesn't take long. Five minutes max. At one point she pulls out her phone to show him something. I can't get a good look at it but it looks like a picture of somebody. I'm too far away to make out who, and I don't want to be overt about my snooping. When they're done she drives off and Peter stands there staring after her for a moment before coming back in. He looks troubled.

"Who was that?"

"Erica," he shrugs. "She's with the cult."

I almost get soda up my nose. "Excuse me?" I ask, once I've recovered. "Did I hear you correctly?"

"Did you pay for that soda?"

"All this time and I'm not entitled to a free soda?"

"It's three bucks."

"Three bucks for a 20-ounce? And wait, hang on, what the hell do you mean by 'the cult?' There's a cult?"

"You didn't think there'd be a cult?"

I give him a deadpan look. "No, sorry, of course, I should have assumed that as soon as I entered Gumption I was suddenly going to be in a Lovecraft story. Do we have fish people as well somewhere?"

He doesn't get the reference. I think of explaining it to him but I really, really don't feel like I have enough energy for that. I wave his confused look aside. "What the hell does the cult want? Are they – what the fuck," I finish. I have too many questions, they're all zipping around all at once. "Are you with the cult?" I ask, finally, giving him a wary look.

"No!" he says quickly, glancing around as though he's afraid all of the nobody inside of the empty store with us might overhear. "I'm not with the cult," he hisses. "Don't worry."

"Is this something I need to be concerned about?"

"Just – look, they're harmless. Just a bunch of crazies who fell victim to the common human need to submit to a higher power. They chose the Pit, that's all. That's it."

"So why's it a cult? Are they mixing the kool-aid right now? Is this place going to be Waco 2 in a couple of weeks?"

"Christ, it isn't that crazy. They just get a little – there's this thing they do. They're secretive. Invite-only. Exclusive group and everything. They do a ripoff spirit journey when you get in, if you're serious about it and you pass their tests. Have to go down the Pit, hang out there for two, three days, come back with some kind of transcendent experience. All I do is help smuggle their initiate in whenever they've got a new one along with the other batch of crazies." He shakes his head. "Those poor motherfuckers."

"What did you mean the other night when you said you had been one of them?" I ask. I'd been waiting all night to ask it but there had never seemed to have been a good moment up until just now. I reach out with a deft motion and click the voice recorder back on. He looks at me and for a moment I wish I were a photographer, not just a hack with a DSLR I got off Ebay. "I don't want you to –" he starts, and then stops. I groan at myself internally, then reach out, lay my hand gently atop his, fingers apart, not clutching, just human contact. He looks at my hand and then back at me.

"I'm not judging you," I tell him. "I want to understand."

He considers that for a moment. He rubs his eyes, then nods. "Okay," he says.

He tells me about July 4th.

 Continue with Part 4

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#writing #mystery flesh pit

[moonlit-imagines]

Unlikely Pair

Peter Parker x Jameson!reader

warnings:

a/n: reader is j. jonah jamesons grandkid im crying this is kind of funny ive never seen anything like it maybe?? please i hope you like it please im so proud of it and PLEASE let me know if i should do part 2

prompt:

You were pretty psyched to start at a new school that was a little more “your pace.” This school was so much better than the others around here, and it was an amazing opportunity. Now, Grandpa JJ had some things to say about the situation. A lot of “back in my day, we didn’t get ‘special opportunities.’ We started from the bottom. You either had skill, or you were a bum.” Thanks for the pep talk, Granddad.

You never did let him get you down, though. In fact, you were almost the exact opposite of him. And you enjoyed making fun of his Spider-Man obsession. Like, geez, if you love him so much, why don’t you marry him.

The first day actually wasn’t going too bad. You met a lot of talented people who you got to know better. These kids have some interesting lives, they really do.

One of the students approached you as you were packing up to leave the classroom.

“Hey! I’m Peter...Parker. Peter Parker.” He stuck his hand out to shake, which you kindly accepted. “And you are?”

“Y/N. Y/N Jameson.” You introduced yourself as you zipped up your bag and put it on. His expression turned into somewhat of confusion.

“‘Jameson...’ Where have I heard that name before?” He brainstormed for a moment while a sly smirk crept into your face.

“I’ll let you work this one out.” You commented. Suddenly, his face lit up.

“Wait! I know! That guy that hates Spider-Man!” He clapped his hands together. “Yeah?” You busted out laughing. “What?”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” You tried to catch your breath. “It’s just, my granddad hates Spider-Man so much, but most people only remember him because of Spider-Man.” His eyes went wide.

“He’s your grandfather?” Peter gasped. “Well, that make’s sense. I mean, he’s obviously not your brother.” He joked, but you could see the regret on his face.

“Not bad.” You snickered. “I like you, uh, Peter, was it?” You asked.

“Bingo.” He shot a finger gun at you, which you chuckled at. This kid was actually kind of funny in a sweet way.

“Hey, do you know where Mr. Gutierrez’s class is?” You pointed at your schedule. Peter snatched it quickly with a smile.

“Yeah! That’s my next class! Follow me.” Peter led you out of the room and weaved through the hallway with you just a few paces behind. “Mr. Gutierrez is the coolest teacher, he teaches chemistry, but like, he really gets into it, you know? There are a few other science teachers here that you might run into, Mr. Dell and Mr. Harrington, they’re both nuts. Dell thinks everything is magic and Harrington talks about his divorce a lot and I’m rambling, sorry.”

“You’re alright, Peter. At least what you talk about is interesting.” You nudged at him and he blushed. He opened the door to Mr. Gutierrez’s classroom and held it for you. “Thanks.”

“Mr. G!” Peter greeted and caught Mr. Gutierrez’s attention.

“Hello, Mr. Parker,” he turned his attention to you, “and who is this?”

“Y/N Jameson.” You stuck your hand out to shake his. Your granddad always talked about how a strong handshake builds character. “Nice to meet you.”

“Yes, you too! Lucky for you, it’s lab day. Would you guys mind being lab partners?” Mr. G asked.

“Not at all, thanks Mr. G!” Peter took you over to his lab table and walked you though the procedures, but he got a little off topic. “Hey, so, I know your grandpa hates Spider-Man...but do you?”

“What does it matter?” You cocked an eyebrow with a sly smile.

“Well, uh, I don’t know, I guess it—it doesn’t? Just making conversation, you know?” He started tripping over his words and you giggled.

“I’m just pushing your buttons, Pete. It’s alright that I call you Pete, right?” You asked. Peter was just kind of...looking at you. Just kept looking. “Pete!” You whisper-shouted.

“Yeah! Yeah, it’s cool.” He straighted his posture and cleared his throat.

“And by the way, yeah, I do like Spider-Man.” You told him and his face lit up.

“Really! Me too! I mean, not in a weird way. I admire him, you know? He seems like a pretty cool guy, all things considered. I’m rambling again.” Peter got quiet really fast.

“Again, Pete, at least it’s interesting.” You began doing a few experiments during the lecture and going on with your small talk.

“I heard that the Decathlon team met Spider-Man. Twice.” You whispered.

“Yeah, he comes around here sometimes.” Peter nodded, looking down and writing in his notes.

“Do you know why?” You asked curiously.

“Not a clue, honestly.” He tried to laugh it off.

“Hm. Maybe I’ll get to meet him someday. That would be awesome. You’re on the Decathlon team, right? You met him?” You started to question more. Peter couldn’t hold back his smile.

“I saw him swing by a few times. He was too busy to talk.” Now all Peter wanted to do was impress you. No, Peter, stop. Great power, great responsibility.

“That’s still pretty cool.” You shrugged. You guys continued you conversation for the majority of the class period, and Mr. G didn’t even stop you. He obviously heard it all, but he was kind of rooting for Peter. You were obviously cute together. The final bell for the school day rang, you gathered your belongings and walked out of the school together.

“So, how are you getting home?” Peter asked you.

“Uh, actually, my granddad told me he was gonna pick me up ‘cause it’s my first day. He’s always on time, so he’s probably waiting for me now.” You told him and he frowned. You did some quick thinking and pulled a pen out of your bag. “Give me your hand.” You reached out.

“Huh?” Peter instinctively put his hand out and you quickly grabbed it and started writing.

“Alrighty, this is my number, text me soon so I have yours.” You capped the pen and put it away. “I will see you tomorrow morning, great meeting you, Pete.” You waved goodbye and made your way to the cars. Peter looked down and read your writing. You wrote your number and your name with a heart next to it, it definitely put a smile on Peter’s face.

You climbed into the car with your granddad and he pulled into the street.

“Who was that boy you were with?” Your granddad asked.

“Oh, that’s Peter! He showed me around today.” You answered a little too giddily.

“Is he nice?” He questioned.

“Very.” You checked your phone, no message yet.

“Well, good. We’re going out to dinner tonight to celebrate your new school. Any suggestions?” He asked.

“Surprise me.” You were already daydreaming about Peter. God, y/n, get it together.

Meanwhile, Peter had finally gotten home and whipped out his phone to put your contact in. He opened up a new message and it took him an eternity to find the right words. He was thinking about asked you out over the weekend, but how?

hey, y/n, it’s pete! wanna grab some pizza this weekend? No, that’s boring.

y/n! it’s peter, was wondering if u wanted to get pizza w me this friday nite? Peter, y/n’s grandpa works for a newspaper, they probably care about grammar.

peter here! wanna get pizza this weekend? No. No, no, no. No. It can’t be this hard!

Hey, it’s Peter! Sorry I took a while to text, I missed my train again. I’m not as punctual as I’d like to be. Anyways, I wanted to know if you had any plans Friday night? I was thinking about maybe getting a pizza if you’re down? There it is! A friendly greeting, a little small talk, an explanation and apology, a question, and a proposal! Perfect composition if I say so, myself.

Peter hit send and you immediately picked up the phone.

“You kids and your damn phones.” Your granddad commented, but you just ignored it and tried to cover the smile on your face. “What? Who is it?” He asked.

“It’s Peter.” You started to reply.

“That boy you just met today? Really? Did he ask you out?” Grandpa Jameson has a whole lot of questions.

“I think he did.” You chuckled as you texted back.

“Well, then...I wanna meet him.” Your granddad nodded. “Yeah! I got to meet him so that I know there’s no funny business.” He banged his fist on the steering wheel.

“Okay, granddad,” you rolled your eyes, “just don’t scare him off.”

“No promises.” He grunted.

Y/N: Yeah, I actually do have plans on Friday. :/ I’m getting pizza with this cute guy from class. He’s kind of awkward, but in a sweet way. He’s also pretty smart and almost mysterious? I hope to get to know him better, though.

Peter: So, is that a yes? 👀

Y/N: Yes!! Just let me know the rest of the details tomorrow! Can’t wait to see you

Peter: ❤️

You put your phone back in your pocket and hummed to the radio as your granddad drove down the busy streets of Manhattan. Today was so much better than you ever thought it could get.

#peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader #peter parker #spiderman far from home x reader #spiderman far from home imagine #spiderman far from home #spiderman #spiderman x reader #spiderman imagine #marvel #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #avengers #avengers x reader #avengers imagine

[petersmparker]

The River Café (Peter Parker x Reader)

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader, Flash Thompson x Reader (as a Plot Device™️ (that I ended up being lowkey attached to?? hit me up flash))

Summary: You’ve decided that you’re going to go out and have a nice time, insistent feelings for your best friend Peter Parker or otherwise.

Word Count: 3757

Warnings: a spicey hint of sailor’s mouth

A/N: I started this two days ago and nearly shitcanned it but now I’m like... kinda in love with it?? I hope y’all like it, I know sticking Flash up in there is unusual but honestly I dig how it came together and I hope everyone’s willing to give it a shot 💙❤️ and also believe me when I say that Flash’s name is legitimately Eugene I fucking swear it (side note: consider this part of my congratulations to @moonstruckholland for one year on her blog!! I hope you enjoy this girl idk what your fic prefs are)

"Let's go on a date friday night."

-

Your group of friends has grown together over the past few years. Leaps and bounds past what you ever might have expected, even. It’s something that you still find yourself reassessing sometimes; occasionally getting caught off guard by something that’s actually pretty natural by now. You can’t help but be pleasantly surprised, though, when you catch yourself thinking back to what it was while witnessing what it is.

Sophomore year of highschool was a ton of awkwardness wrapped up in a silly belief that everyone had already become the person they were meant to be. Senior year, you find it much more appealing to declare just how much no one knows that they’re doing.

The one constant for you in all this time has been Peter. Peter, ever-changing, ever-moving, ever-working, has not remained static in his existence. He has, however, stayed unwaveringly connected to you. For him, you do the same.

You’re there when Uncle Ben dies, sitting in the stairwell of the funeral home when Peter can’t handle another person passing on their condolences. It’s you who makes Peter do his homework and study for his tests when he determines that he doesn’t need school anymore. Your eyes follow him as he sprints from the gymnasium on the night of homecoming, and again later when he decides to sneak off the bus to investigate the space ship descending upon New York. When you wake up on the other side of the Blip, it’s you who runs to Peter’s apartment to find him mourning the loss of his mentor.

“Don’t you get tired?” Peter asked once in junior year, as you wiped blood from his side with a wet wash cloth, fuming over the newest live report of J Jonah Jameson, “You don’t wish you didn’t have to deal with all of this?”

“Never,” you had responded, “I. . . I love you, Pete.”

Peter had given you a small, weak smile and returned to digging through the first aid kit, seemingly untouched by your admission. It’s not difficult to assume that he had interpreted it friendly in nature, and you figure that that’s proof enough of his nonexistent feelings for you.

That's why, a year later-- assured in the belief that Peter views you only as a friend and comfortable enough in the fact that you’re still figuring this whole life thing out-- you decide to accept the offer of one Flash Thompson for a date.

What’s the harm, you figure. It seems casual enough, and Flash had mellowed out over the years. He's no longer quite so quick to tease others or flaunt his wealth, and had become a relatively decent friend of yours. Worst case scenario, it’s awkward, you get a free meal, and the both of you continue on to pretend it didn’t happen. Best case. . .

Maybe you move on from Peter.

-

Peter shows up unannounced at your door late Friday afternoon with a backpack full of schoolwork and snacks. It's not unusual of him at all, and yet when you hurry to answer the door, the sight of him catches you by surprise.

His gaze flicks upward to your wet hair, twisted into a towel, and then down to your hands, which you're holding out cautiously to avoid ruining a fresh coat of black polish. The confusion on his face is amused in nature. You're not normally one to paint your nails unless there's an event going on.

"Uh, hi, Peter," you say, trying not to sound unwelcoming.

This is such bad timing.

"Hey," he greets, hand wrapping around the strap of his backpack, "What's up? I was thinking we could do homework for an hour and then give up to watch movies instead."

You hadn't told Peter about the date. Telling him, you feared, would feel like you were asking for him to disapprove. To ask you not to go. It wasn't a disappointment you were willing to inflict upon yourself. Not when you were feeling a bit of hope for the outcome of the date. You wanted to be enthusiastic; wanted to enjoy the company of a friend and see if something could come out of it that was more than hopeless pining.

"I kind of have plans," you admit, unable to meet his eye.

Confusion colors his tone now, too. "Oh, really? Well, uh, do you mind if I come in for a little while anyway? Since I'm here. I need a bit of help with the English assignment."

Part of you wants to say no. But you can't look at Peter Parker and turn him away, and so you back up to let him into your apartment. He knows the way to your room by now and leads the way there. Every available surface is littered with items of clothing. He'd seen your room somewhat messy before, but you can tell he isn't expecting it to look like a tornado has been through your closet. You avoid his eyes, embarrassed, when he turns to give you a questioning look.

He throws himself onto your bed, shifting to sit with his back against the headboard, and digs a notebook from his bag. After a moment, he pulls a dress out from under himself and puts it aside.

You find yourself standing awkwardly in the doorway. A glance at the alarm clock on your nightstand tells you that Flash will be picking you up in only forty-five minutes. Peter clearly doesn't intend to leave until he's asked, and you don't have the will to ask. Which means you're going to have to just finish getting ready, anyway, and send him off before Flash arrives.

"What did you need help with?" You ask, going over to the dresser to look into the mirror above it.

You remove the towel from your hair to find that it's mostly dry. Satisfied, you brush it all back, away from your face. You see him looking at you in the mirror, but attempt to ignore it. It's already uncomfortable enough preparing for a date in front of the guy you're in love with. Must he make you feel weird for prettying yourself up a bit, even inadvertently?

What did I do to deserve this? you wonder, and apply a hint of peach eyeshadow with the tip of your finger.

He looks back to the notebook. You pretend not to notice that, either.

"The argumentative essay," he says finally, with a sigh, "Mr. Sharpton said my thesis needs work."

"Sharpton tends to be a picky little bitch. Read it to me," you instruct, dabbing glitter onto your eyelids and across your freckles.

He does. It's not the worst thesis statement. The intention is clear. Peter's always been better with math and science, but he's never been hopeless with English, either. "Well, you've got all three prongs already," you start, before pausing to apply a healthy amount of clear gloss, "They're just not parallel. It sounds awkward. For what you're trying to say, you could probably just reorganize the sentence, but structure it around the phrase, 'Through the author's use of. . . '" you wave your hand, indicating his points, "'. . .blah blah blah is represented.'"

Peter hums in understanding, followed by the scratching of pen against paper. You take the time to apply mascara and go about picking through the clothes strewn around the room to reassess what to wear. Kneeling on the floor, you throw various clothes back toward the open closet door.

Too casual, too dressy, too casual, too casual, that's stained, ew.

Your cell phone beeps on the bedside table. The sound of pen on paper ceases. Before you can say anything, Peter, who've never minded reading your texts, picks it up out of habit. He reads the message out to you.

"Um. Flash says to wear something fancy?" He says, sounding disconcerted.

The sick feeling in your stomach is immediate.

"Uhh. Thanks."

You pull the black dress that you'd deemed too dressy back out of the closet, hoping to appear more casual and less about-to-vomit. Thirty minutes left. Not even that much. Just twenty minutes and you could have sent Peter home none the wiser and had an extra ten to hype yourself up for this date, but now you're confronted with the fact that Peter knows. He knows and you're going to have to hear about it.

"You're going out with Flash?" He asks as you attempt to quell your nerves by focusing very hard on removing the couple of cat hairs that stick to the velvet material of the dress.

"Yeah."

"Like, on a date?"

"Yeah."

You risk a glance at Peter. His expression is unreadable. The sight of it makes your stomach twist. To escape it, you step into the closet and close the door under the guise of changing clothes.

"How did that happen?" Peter calls through the door.

You wince. There's something in his tone like disappointment, and you realize that you never considered the possibility that he might judge you for your willingness to go on a date with Flash. Sure, they were something like friends nowadays, but maybe that didn't mean Peter actually genuinely liked the guy. The prospect of having just lost Peter's respect is like a needle to the heart.

"He- He asked me out after decathlon the other day. I thought it might be fun."

"That's. . . interesting," Peter says, tone still off in some way.

The feeling that spreads through you is gross. There's a bitter taste in your mouth. You hate it. This was supposed to be something simple, something nice you could enjoy for yourself. You don't want Peter to ruin it for you, whether or not that's his intention.

You tug on the dress hurriedly and exit the closet, doing your best to maintain some sort of neutrality in your expression. "Flash is my friend. He said he that he kinda likes me and it seemed like it would be nice to go out with him," you say, "Whats wrong with that, Peter?"

Peter looks like he's been accused. Your tone wasn't as calm as intended, so it's no surprise.

"Nothing!" He responds, throwing his hands up in a placating gesture, "It's just- it's weird, isn't it?"

It feels like the air has been sucked out of your room. Your ears ring. In the back of your head, you know-- you know he only means it's weird because it's Flash you're about to go out with. But you're being faced with a conversation you didn't want, forced to acknowledge that you were never going to just find a person who makes you laugh and be able to just get the hell over Peter, and what comes out reflects the hurt feelings that are eating at you in the moment.

"Weird?" You demand, "Is it really so goddamn weird that someone could have feelings for me, Peter? Just because you don't-!"

Anger and hurt clouds your brain and you lose your train of thought entirely, breaking off in an involuntary scoff. You snatch your shoes off the floor and your apartment keys off the dresser. It isn't until you've stalked over to the nightstand to grab your phone that you continue.

"I'm leaving. I'm going on that date with Flash and I'm going to enjoy myself. Lock the door on your way out."

Peter's still on the bed, unmoved. He looks more startled than he's ever been by something you've said, and then even more so when you toss the apartment keys in his direction.

When you storm out of your own home, shoes still clutched in your hand, you try desperately to wipe from your mind the image of the shocked look on your best friend's face.

-

The date is nice.

Like, actually, genuinely nice.

Flash happens to arrive at your building just in time to find you gazing hard into the glass of the lobby. You're swiping frustratedly at the mascara that has run with the few angry tears you couldn't prevent. You manage to play the makeup off as no big deal, but his eyes drift immediately to your bare feet and the shoes clutched in your left hand. There's no good explanation for being shoeless on a New York City street.

"Do I want to ask?" He questions, looking kinda grossed out and at least moderately concerned.

"Please don't," you answer.

He opens the car door for you like you haven't already ruined your chances of impressing him, and you can't help but marvel at how different he is from the Flash of two years ago, who would most definitely have gotten back in his car and sped off.

The drive is long and Flash won't tell you what the destination is. You pass the time with chatter, not all that different from what you'd probably be exchanging in study hall. The convertible's roof is down, which makes it difficult not to look up for a hint of red and blue passing by, but Flash stares up openly for his idol when the car is stopped.

You don't think Spider-Man will be out tonight.

After a while, you cross the Brooklyn Bridge. Flash hands the keys over to the valet of the restaurant and helps you out of the car. He makes a joke about how your shoes better be on, but you barely hear.

"Flash, really?"

"What?"

The entrance to the restaurant is beautiful, lit with warm-colored string lights and surrounded by luscious greenery. You recognize the name on the sign, hand-painted in green; your parents had come here for their 25th anniversary a while back.

"This place is really fucking expensive," you say, and suddenly become very aware of the fact that you hadn't brought your wallet.

"I like the side dishes here," he says, like the scalloped potatoes wouldn’t cost a normal person half a fridge of groceries.

"You're nuts."

Flash buttons the top two buttons of his plaid suit jacket and takes your hand. Your stomach flips. From nerves or guilt, you're not sure. It's probably both.

"Do you have a reservation?" Asks the Maître D' when you enter.

You're prepared to have to leave, figuring that a spot at a swanky place like this would need to be reserved months in advance, but Flash pulls out his license to show to the man.

"Yes we do. 6:30, under the name Eugene Thompson."

"This way then, Mr. Thompson."

Your table next to the window overlooks the East River. The dining room has already begun to fill with the dinner rush and the little band in the corner is playing a sweet-sounding song. The menu is astronomically expensive, but Flash urges you to get whatever you want. You settle for the cheapest chicken dish on the menu and take to watching the boats pass beneath the Brooklyn Bridge. Flash orders a meat and cheese plate to start, unsurprisingly, and arranges combinations on bread and crackers for you to try.

It's more fun than you ever expected it to be, honestly. You'd been prepared for Flash to be a bit much after having agreed to let him choose the date, but he's just trying to make sure you enjoy yourself. He makes jokes and laughs at your own. Refills your drink from the water flute before you've even noticed you've gotten low. Offers you a taste of his meal. You're distracted, Peter no longer at the forefront of your mind.

With Flash, it's easy.

"I'll be honest, Eugene," you start, teasingly, and giggle at Flash's fake-annoyed attempt to jokingly swat at the side of your head, "This is. . . This is really, really nice. My wig is sufficiently snatched."

He busts out laughing, earning a look from those at nearby tables. After a few moments, he quiets and takes to smiling down at his steak.

His smile softens into something a bit awkward, maybe somewhat unsure, when he says, “Can I ask you something?”

Your heart involuntarily skips a beat. When is that question ever a good sign? “I- uh, yeah. Sure. What’s up?”

“What’s up with you and Parker?”

When you meet Flash’s eye, he doesn’t appear accusatory. He doesn’t even seem upset. More than anything, you’d say he looks confused. You, however, can feel heat rising aggressively to your cheeks.

You feel guilty again.

“Peter? What do you mean?” 

He rolls his eyes good-naturedly in response and sets down his fork. “Oh, come on now. You like him right? Since like, middle school.”

You know you’ve never really actively tried to hide it from anyone, but having it said aloud like that is jarring. It’s embarrassing. You wonder why Flash wants to talk about this, of all things, when your date had actually been going pretty darn well. But you decide to be honest, since fooling him is unrealistic.

“A while, yeah.”

“Then why are you on a date with me right now?” Flash questions.

“You. . . you asked me out?” You answer confusedly.

He passes a hand through his hair a bit agitatedly. You hope he isn’t annoyed with you, but you aren’t sure what he’s expecting you to say.

“I mean,” he clarifies, a laugh escaping his lips, “Why the hell aren’t you dating him? It’s been years already. Did you guys decide that you didn’t want to risk ruining your friendship? What’s up?”

It seems that your brain is exclusively capable of performing the sound of a record scratch on repeat. You have no idea how to respond to anything Flash has just said. None of it makes sense. Peter doesn’t like you. He never has. If Flash has paid enough attention to notice how much you like your best friend, surely he should have noticed that your affection is definitely not returned.

You don't want to think about it. You don't want a spark of hope, only for it to be stomped on. Today's events alone have been proof enough that Peter doesn't like you.

"Why did you ask me out if you knew I like Peter?" You question, staring down at your half-eaten chicken parmesan.

"Why did you agree if you like Peter?"

You can feel him looking at you. When you decide to meet his eye, you're scared to see the hurt that's in them.

It's not there.

"You were hoping to get over him, right?" Flash asks, half a smile on his face, "I was hoping you would, too."

He takes your hand for the first time since you entered the restaurant, and you realize that if anything, he maybe kind of gets it.

“Peter doesn’t have feelings for me,” you manage to say, after several long moments of silence have passed.

“Dude, Parker’s in love with you.”

-

Considering everything, the ride home isn't nearly as awkward as it could have been. 

Flash parks a little ways down the street from your building. He doesn't get up to help you out of the car like he had before. You can't really hold that against him.

"Sorry about all this," you say, guilt still swirling low in your gut, after you've shut the passenger side door.

He side eyes you when he says, "Don't flatter yourself, honey, I'll get over it," and grins, "Go tell Parker that I will actually straight up call my lawyers if he fucks this up now that I've laid all this shit out for him."

With that, he waves his hand once and then pulls away from the curb. 

Thanks Eugene, is the text you send him during the walk home.

He responds with selfie of him flipping off the camera, and things are just about as close to normal between you as you figure they can be, for now. It's with a laugh that you send one back, shoes once again clutched in your flipping-off hand as you knock on the door to your apartment and wait for your parents to let you in.

Peter opens the door.

Your smile freezes in its place and then falls. His gaze averts quickly to the floor, like he's just done something wrong. You aren't sure what to say to him. "You're still here," you settle on pointing out, eventually.

"How'd it go?" He asks, skipping over the part where he explains the fact that he's still in your apartment.

He looks very much like he doesn't want to hear the answer, but also like he's trying to sound enthusiastic for you. Your heart aches. It's been hours since you'd left, and he's been sitting here marinating in the fight. Meanwhile, while you were fine dining with a friend who turned out to be way better of a friend than you'd thought he was.

"We enjoyed ourselves," you admit.

"Oh," he responds, voice a bit shaky, "That's good. I mean- It's great. That's really great. I'm glad. I'm happy for you."

"Hey, Peter?"

"Yeah?"

Your throat wants to close when you look into his eyes, but you press on.

"Are you in love with me?"

". . .Yeah."

Despite the fact that you grasp the front of his shirt in your fist when you lean in to kiss him, it's neither hurried nor forceful. It's a response, and an assurance. You pull back enough to see his eyebrows knitted together in confusion, then kiss him a second time, just a peck.

He leans his forehead against yours, sighing in relief. The tension that he must have been holding in his body releases, and you feel his stance soften with your hand still against his chest.

"I should have told you," he murmurs, reaching up to cup your jaw.

You can't help but crack a smile. "Yeah, Pete. Flash had to tell me. On our date."

"That's so awkward."

You laugh. "You're tellin' me."

He leans away from you when he exclaims, suppressing his laughter, "Hey, you didn't tell me, either!"

"Oh my god, Peter," you gush, "Yes I did! Over a year ago!"

His smile falls like he's just had the air knocked out of him. "You what?"

"Oh my god," you repeat, shaking your head in disbelief, "oh my god." 

Peter falls into a slew of apologies, but you're starting to laugh, and they start to die on his lips just ask quickly as they had begun to form. You pull him forward by his shirt once more and kiss him in the doorway, revelling in the ridiculousness of it all.

"I'm in love with you too," you sigh.

If his delighted smile weren't already enough, the kiss that follows more than makes up for it.

Tag list

@undiadeestos

#peter parker #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker fanfic #peter parker fic #peter parker x reader #peter parkerxreader #peter parker reader insert #peter parker self insert #peter parker fluff #peter parker angst #spiderman fanfiction #spiderman fic #marvel fanfiction #flash thompson #flash thompson x reader

[ty-talks-comics]

Best of Marvel: Week of January 22nd, 2020

Best of this Week: Amazing Spider-Man #38 (Legacy #839) - Nick Spencer, Iban Coello, Brian Reber and Joe Caramagna

I can read the headline now: Spider-Man vs. Fake News.

At least that's what it seems like this next Spider-Man arc will be about as the titular hero has to deal with his "biggest supporter," J. Jonah Jameson, and his new job as a clickbait hound in the age of modern online journalism. Who knows what hijinks will ensue?

This issue exemplified the kind of humor that Nick Spencer excels at: the hilarity of hypocrisy when it comes to some of Spider-Man’s supporting cast. This was best shown in Spencer’s hilarious Superior Foes of Spider-Man (2013) as Boomerang did everything in his power to create a new Sinister Six while selling them out at every turn and not learning from his actions as everyone in his sphere suffered the consequences of his betrayals. Spencer channels that same energy as Jameson has to face the fruits of his journalistic practices in the form of Norah Winters and the new Threats and Menaces blog office.

After Jonah launches into a (Boomer) rant about today's journalists, calling them soft, self-obsessed and lacking the edge that made him what he is, Norah tells her team to sound off about the stories they’re working on. Without missing a beat and with faces of malice, thanks to Coello, they tout their intentionally misleading headlines.

Norah explains that in the age of the 24-hour news cycle, they need to get those clicks by any means necessary and that Jameson was the inspiration for this because of his past headlines calling Spider-Man a menace usually without real evidence. She expects villains to repost it to their audiences and heroes to quote it with malice, giving them more clicks.

Everyone likes to take the piss of millennial journalists and can often come off as cringy, but somehow Spencer, Iban Coello and Brian Reber manage to really capture the essence of modern open architecture office spaces filled with young kids and their kooky hair colors. Coello draws a really good shot of this with the addition of a space for video games, two bright green vending machines and tables full of people either on desktops without dividing walls or on personal laptops. Of course, all of this comes after Jonah is nearly hit by a douchebag riding an electric scooter.

Reber colors everything in contrast to Jameson who wears a professional brown suit. The office itself is brightly lit, all of the freelancers and employees are given brighter clothes with striking reds, pinks, blues and purples. Even the basic Threats and Menaces banner is a bright red, kinda signalling how bad this company might be. It’s really fun to see how out of his element Jonah is among these kids and how much more awful they are in comparison to him… aside from creating supervillains.

As all of this is going on, Spider-Man is robbing a bank. One can see how this might be a problem as Jonah is doing his best to defend Spider-Man to Winters who wants him to write a smearing headline about the crime. Coello and Reber introduce us to the act with an amazingly dynamic splash page of Spidey zipping into the sky carrying bags of cash. The webs are slung so hard that they blur, laser gun blasts almost fly off the pages with vibrant red and orange colors and Spider-Man’s posing makes him look like he’s avoiding danger with ease.

We get a sidestory with Silver Sable trying to regain her strength with the help of (former?) Spider-Man villain, Foreigner, as the two are now lovers. After helping her, Foreigner goes to a secret casino where the use of superpowers is encouraged and there’s betting on the battles between superheroes, villains and everything in between.

Foreigner still maintains his supervillain connections, but he seems to be using it towards helping Sable. Minor supervillain and assassin, Chance, has set up the robbery and casino in order to place bets on Spidey's performance and potential property damage. Of course, he also rigs it so that surprise drones appear to make things harder. As things begin to get hectic, lo and behold we get the best shot in the entire book: J. Jonah Jameson riding in to save Spider-Man on an electric scooter.

Coello and Reber make Jonah look like an absolute mad lad as he rushes into danger without a second thought to save Spider-Man. Fiery explosions ring out behind him, his pose makes him look like he came straight out of a Tony Hawk game and Spider-Man is absolutely shocked at all of this. Legitimately, it’s a really badass panel and one that should go down as one of the best out of context shots in comic history. 

Spider-Man reacts as we would expect, chastising Jonah for putting himself in danger. Jonah retorts that he and Spider-Man were supposed to be a team after Jonah owned up to his some of his worst actions after a gang of supervillains confronted him and Spider-Man earlier in the series. Though he was supposed to keep it secret at the request of his sister, Teresa Parker, Spider-Man reveals to Jonah that the bank he robbed was a front for a criminal organization and that he needed to run because there were too many bad guys. As Jonah flees, he vows to Spider-Man that he’ll make his life easier one way or another.

Soon after, we get an amazing double page spread of Spider-Man taking down these nameless villains as Chance counts down. He thwips, kicks and smashes these clowns over the head with his signature Spidey style before Chance announces that the house wins after Spider-Man takes them all down.

As far as art showcasing goes, Coello, Reber and Joe Caramagna smash it out of the park here. The panels flow as the action moves between Spider-an acrobatic antics and Chance’s excited facial expressions. Colors are rich and switch between explosive oranges to dynamic blue skies. The lettering is truly amazing as every sound effect is emphasized and given proper placement for effect.

Spider-Man wins, but soon gets a call from Teresa, asking him if he knows what Top Secret means. He questions what’s going on and then sees the headline from J. Jonah Jameson exposing the plot and why Spider-Man is a hero for it, accompanied by Jonah raising his arms into the air with childlike excitement. This is gonna be a wacky adventure.

This book was a lot of fun and I’m glad Nick Spencer is writing it. He’s able to bring the funny and really works with his artists to give each issue and story its own identity. None of them feel exactly the same and that’s commendable. With much thanks to Chip Zdarsky, Nick Spencer continues to build on the relationships established in the Spectacular Spider-Man series with Jameson doing his best to repay Peter for all the times he’s called him a menace after revealing his identity to his former biggest antagonist. At the same time, it’s nice that Peter’s also keeping in contact with his sister Teresa, a character that absolutely has a lot more going on that people might expect.

Iban Coello is an amazing artist and makes every page look so dynamic and fun, combined with Brian Reber’s coloring, this is an awesome looking Spider-Man book. Joe Caramagna as always does a stellar job by placing each balloon so that the dialogue is easy to follow without cluttering up the pages, emphasizing words to give every character a unique voice and placing sound effects so that one can almost hear the pages as they turn. I enjoyed all of this immensely.

If there's any criticism I could level at this book, it would be the drawing out of the eventual conflict between Spider-Man and Kindred. I know Nick Spencer is playing the long game and he's very good at it, making me anticipate it with every issue the creepy villain appears in, but there has to be substantial storytelling in the mean time. Hunted was an amazing story from start to finish, but the 2099 crossover left a lot to be desired.

In between, there hasn't been much to rave about. Even the Absolute Carnage crossover and the Sinister Syndicate storyline have been on the lower levels of Spencer's stories during his time on Spider-Man. Sure they were fun, but unlike the absolute hilarity that is the storyline with Boomerang, they feel a bit disjointed from the rest of the stellar story that Spencer is telling. I get a similar feeling from this issue despite how fun it was.

But don’t let my impatience stop you from buying this book!

#spider man #amazing spider man #j jonah jameson #fake news #marvel comics #marvel #nick spencer #iban coello #brian reber #joe caramagna

[hellzyeahwebwieldingreviews]

Untold Tales of Spider-Man 03: Celebrity – by Christopher Golden and Jose R. Nieto

Well this story sucked.

Peter Parker is hanging out at the Daily Bugle flirting with Betty Brant when J. Jonah Jameson orders him to head to Angelique's, a Fifth Avenue French restaurant where Johnny Storm is escorting starlet Heather Fox "to an early dinner...before her big premiere tonight." The Bugle is doing an article comparing "the heroic Torch to the criminal insect" Spider-Man. Jonah promises Pete two-thirds of his usual rate because "these paparazzi things are a breeze." (An amusing comment considering what's going on in ASM these days.)Peter positions himself on the sidewalk at the restaurant and is nearly trampled by the professional paparazzi when Johnny and Heather show up. He wonders how Johnny ended up so famous while Spider-Man ended up so infamous.Johnny and Heather aren't the only ones dining at Angelique's. William Baker is there with his date Candace. The menu prices are almost more than he can afford but it's worth it to him to impress Candace. He met her when he was casing the jewelry store at which she works but had to wait until he was out on parole to ask her out since he is the Sandman and had been captured by Spider-Man. But Candace doesn't know any of that and, spotting the Torch, she moons and sighs over him so much that William's jealousy gets the better of him. He attacks the Torch, trying to prove to his date who the real man is. Soon, Spider-Man joins the fight. The Sandman thinks this is great. It gives him more opportunity to prove himself to Candace. He doesn't know that she is mortified, that she is experiencing her worst date ever. She ends up side-by-side with Heather who is "looking bored and exasperated." The women talk. Candace fawns over the Torch only to learn that Heather thinks Johnny is a boring kid, that she'd rather go out with a different member of the Fantastic Four ("I mean, a girl has to be curious," she says) and that she thinks the Sandman is a "sandy hunk".In the fight, Spidey lets the comments of the crowd get to him ("Ya can't expect real heroes like the Torch to keep bailing you out!"), which translates into him letting the Sandman wallop Johnny from behind. Sandy realizes he has ruined his date. When he sees the rest of the Fantastic Four arrive, he skips out. Spidey hears the crowd cheer and thinks they are cheering for him until he sees the Fantasticar with Reed, Sue, and Ben in it. The recovering Torch angrily tells Spidey, "You need to relax, buddy." Spidey, unrepentant, tells Johnny to get back to his date. "I'm sure she's really impressed by your feats of derring-do," he says. "Not particularly," says Heather who has approached the two super-heroes. As the paparazzi snap photos of Johnny and Heather, she tells him that she is ditching him to go have café au lait with her new friend Candace. She only joined the heroes because she wanted to ask Spider-Man "if there was any way he could put me in touch with that Sandman guy." Hearing this, Johnny's face turns bright red ("For once, the change in color wasn't brought on by fire.") and, seeing that, Spidey swings away whistling a happy tune.

I really hope we didn’t peak with the second story in this anthology. This story is by far the weakest of the three I’ve looked at thus far and bears more similarities to the first story than the second.

This was another Marvel Team Up issue except one weirdly more focused upon the Sandman than the Human Torch. We get things from Peter’s, Sandman’s and Sandman girlfriend’s point of view in that order.

The majority of the story consists of  a super powered brawl in a fancy restaurant. Were this a comic book it’d be good enough for maybe a backup story or at a push a filler issue. Here it’s downright unacceptable.

Prose is (aside from maybe radio) is the weakest possible medium to do action set pieces in. Whilst the likes of Horowitz or Fleming can pull it off it’s notoriously difficult and especially so when you have characters designed for a visual medium in the first place. Spider-Man action set pieces typically involve a lot of punching, kicking, dodging, etc. in prose that just isn’t that interesting to read about. You just find yourself lamenting that you can’t see what is happening. Although a part from a neat trick where Torch burns Sandman the action we get is bog standard.

Sandman attacks the Torch, the Torch retaliates backed up by Spidey, they go back and forth, Spidey uses the fact that he is made of sand against him, he escapes. That is the sum total of the action here and it constitutes half the goddam story if not more.

Like the first story, this one isn’t much as a Spider-Man tale because it doesn’t really get personal at all and it doesn’t involve the two halves of his life really impacting upon one another. The closest we get is that Peter’s day job positions him to be at the scene of Sandman’s attack. Frustratingly the story doesn’t start like that as we actually visit the Bugle and get what might be our third exposition dump about Peter’s status quo in the whole book. Here at least we see Betty Brant and the story seemed like it was going to touch on her and Peter’s relationship somehow but it’s pure filler.

Spidey is also weirdly out of character here. It’s like if they took the jerkass Spidey from ASM #8’s backup story and used him as the basis for this story. He’s not quite as bad but he kind of enjoys Human Torch’s rejection, is seriously jealous and frustrated by the public’s lack of appreciation. Him being upset that the public hate him is one thing, but here he’s almost back to being AF #15 Spidey.

The story also makes little sense in regards to the Sandman. First of all there is a mind boggling line about how when he isn’t in his sandform he’s literally flesh and blood. Nooooooooooo he really isn’t. As Spider-Man 3 wonderfully demonstrated, he’s always sand 100% of the time. He can make himself look and like a human’s senses, but even if he looks human you can’t knock him out as though he was a normal guy. And Spidey doesn’t even do that when he gets the chance because he alerts him like a moron.

The plot is also dumb because Sandman, a repeat felon who is also now super empowered was released on parole…for good behavior. Not only is it unbelievable for Sandman to act that way at all, but why the fuck would the prison allow him to leave given his record and more importantly his super powers?!

Just about the only good thing about this story was the brief insight into Sandman’s mind where we learn how he’s grown resentful of normal life’s rules given his power and the brief scenes of his and Torch’s dates chatting. But the latter is purely because it was something vaguely different that broke up the dullness of the fight scene.

The experience was made all the more unpleasant by DeSantos ear grating performance for this story. His Sandman isn’t too bad but everyone else sounded subpar at best and unbearable at worst (chiefly the female characters).

All in all this story was rather pathetic and skippable.

P.S. This story’s placement within Spidey canon is vague but it seems to broadly happen towards the end of Peter’s high school career. It is clearly influenced by ASM #21 even if it’s placement in relation to that issue is not clear at all.

#Untold Tales Of Spider-Man #Spider-Man #peter parker #Sandman #Human Torch #Johnny Storm #Flint Marko #Betty Brant #J. Jonah Jameson

[lustresky]

hochelaga [peter parker]

summary: Peter never really had a ton of positive male influences in his life, and at this point he had given up his hopes of ever having one— that is, until he meets Happy. 

wc: 4200ish.

themes: angst, peter’s a misunderstood and troubled teen, some happy stuff in the end (cuz i physically can’t write shit that doesn’t end in a happy ending ok), trust issues, happy cares about peter, some family fluff because i just want peter to be happy ok:’’(

warnings: cursing (da usual), underage smoking & mentions of nicotine addiction, me trying to be deep haha yikes!

a/n: title is a song by alexandre poulin. (it’s a really good song, i highly recommend listening to it in the background while reading/listening to it after! i translated the lyrics in english but it isn’t an exact translation, i changed a bit of the words to fit in more with the story!!) i recently listened to it again and it inspired me to write this. a lot of fics have tony as a parental figure in peter’s life, and he was my first choice for this fic too, but in the end happy just... made more sense. but honestly?? idek if this fic makes any sense. hopefully it does lmao

if you have any questions about this fic, feel free to send me an ask!

please note that the plots of CIVIL WAR, INFINITY WAR & ENDGAME are excused in this fic. 

available on ao3.

T’es pas mon père, tu t’prends pour qui? (You’re not my dad, who do you think you are?) Tu sais rien de moi pis de mes amis. (You know nothing about me or my friends.)

Peter scoffs to himself as he hears May laugh in the living room; he hisses at the contact of alcohol on his skin, groaning at the large gash on his forearm. He quickly bandages it up, making sure to wear a long sleeve shirt in order to hide the large white cotton wrapping around his injured limb. 

As soon as he hears footsteps, he swiftly hides the first-aid kit under his bed.

May opens his bedroom door, still wearing her work clothes and a huge smile on her face. “Peter!” She grins, walking towards him and grabbing his arm— the one that had been sliced open just an hour ago. He inwardly winces, but keeps on his indifferent face. 

He has a front to maintain. 

“Come on! I have someone for you to meet.”

Ma mère ’n’a ramené des ben plus tough, (My mom has brought home tougher guys,) Moi, les gars comme toi j’les mets dans ma poche. (Guys like you are nothing to me.)

 Peter trudges to the living room, mentally preparing himself to see another man that he knows he would hate in a few days’ time. 

To his surprise, however, he’s greeted by a man who’s the exact opposite of the image that he had been used to. Where the black leather jacket had been, there’s a formal black suit— complete with a tie and all. Where the gelled up hair and five o’clock shadow had been, there’s curly, salt and pepper hair with a white beard to match. 

Where a smirk that seemed to size him up had been, there’s a genuine smile.

“This is Harold,” May introduces the man in front of him with such a wide grin that her eyes crinkle. “Harold “Happy” Hogan.”

What kind of fucking name is Happy?

Harold clears his throat and offers his right hand to Peter; a first for all the men that May had brought back home.

“I’m Peter.” Peter says, taking his hand. The man gently grips it, hands warm yet firm at the same time as he shook it with one of them on top of Peter’s own. “Nice to meet you, Harold.” He adds, forcing out the manners May had ingrained in him even if he doesn’t like it.

“Nice to meet you too, Peter,” Harold smiles. “And Harold’s too formal—”

“Just call me Happy.”

Pis tu vas ben faire comme tous les autres, (You’d be just like the others,) Tu vas claquer la porte en mettant ton coat. (You’d slam the door closed whilst wearing your coat.)

Harold— no, Happy, stays over for dinner. Peter left the conversation to May and him as he focuses on the news being displayed on the TV while he chews on the food that she had prepared.

“Rising vigilante, Spider-Man, spotted!” The female TV reporter announces, hair swishing left and right as she animates her words with hand gestures. “Six thieves have been found, bound with the ever familiar web and with the oh-so-famous venom puncture holes in their necks!”

“As much as his work is appreciated by many,” The announcer continues. “Is his way of justice acceptable, when these men—” The TV flickers to show the mug-shots of the six men, now incapacitated due to the poison. Peter recognizes the one who had cut his arm immediately. “Have not yet faced trial? Tonight, we will be discussing this with J. Jonah Jameson, editor in chief of The Daily—”

The TV screen suddenly goes black. Peter groans at May as he looks over at her; her arm outstretched with the remote in her hand aimed at the now blank display.

“No watching TV while we’re eating dinner.”

 C’est moi du haut de mes 14 ans, (It’s my 14 year old self,) Qui veille sur le bonheur de ma maman.  (Who grows old because of my mom’s happiness.)

 Peter had quickly retreated in his bedroom after dinner, telling May that he still had homework to do.

The truth is that he just can’t stomach seeing Happy and his legal guardian sending love eyes to one another for another fucking hour.

Especially when he had already told himself numerous times in the past few years to never attach himself to any of the men that she brought home— no matter how happy they make her, because he knows better.

He tries to disregard their laughter outside of his bedroom. He tries to ignore the creaks of the floorboard as May sent Happy home. He tries to be oblivious to the peck that they both shared as a goodbye.

Tries; because his enhanced senses completely made sure that he notices every single one of them.

Much to his dismay.

 T’es pas mon père, m’as-tu compris? (You’re not my dad, don’t you understand?) J’les connais les grands secrets d’la vie. (I already know life’s greatest secrets.)

 Peter still remembers his first smoke.

He had been twelve.

It had been an experience— and when his senses got even more enhanced after he got bit, it didn’t take long for him to get addicted.

May doesn’t know about it. Just like she doesn’t know about him being a vigilante.

As soon as he hears a scream from an alley not too far from where he’s perched, Peter drops his smoke onto the cement— squishing and therefore extinguishing it with his foot.

He shoots a web onto the light pole to his right, hoping that whoever it is that he’ll save, that they’ll give him money for his services; just like what most people would do.

Peter lets out a breath, missing the nicotine in his lungs.

He’ll need it for another hit.

 Garde tes histoires pis tes conseils, (Keep your stories and advices to yourself,) Check, fais tes affaires, j’vas faire pareil. (Look, mind your business and I’ll do the same.)  

Happy comes over again for dinner.

As May cooks, they both sit on the sofa, watching the news.

“Spider-Man strikes again!” The same female reporter from a few days ago announces. “This time it seems that he has saved over a dozen people in a department store by binding the attacker in his webs and incapacitating him with his ‘venom’!”

Happy groans beside him and Peter looks up at him, annoyed. What’s his deal?

As if he can read minds, Happy looks back at him, a stern look on his face.

“Listen,” He starts, head downcast to stare at him in the eye. “If something like that ever happens to you, you go and run the other way— alright?”

Peter scoffs at his words and breaks eye contact. As if.

Happy doesn’t seem to be content with his answer. So stubbornly, he asks, “Peter? Do you understand?”

Peter subtly rolls his eyes. Who does he think he is? 

“Yeah,” He just replies back, not wanting to strike another conversation with another person who thinks that they have more power than him. 

He has had enough of those.

 Mais si jamais tu mets l’pied dans ma chambre, (If you even enter a foot in my room,) J’te jure que j’te paye des vacances. (I’ll make sure that you’ll regret it.)

 “Peter!” 

Peter quickly fumbles out of his suit, pulling the red and blue cloth off rapidly as he opens his closet door to stuff it in. At full speed, he grabs his venom and web shooters and locks them inside his desk drawer.

The footsteps don’t cease, and Peter only manages to get a shirt over his head and a pair of boxers over his legs before his door opens to reveal Happy; an eyebrow raised at him.

It doesn’t take long before the man’s eyes widen upon casting sight onto his bleeding legs.

“Jesus Christ, Peter, what happened to you?” He asks, opening the door even more to let himself in. “Are you okay?”

Peter doesn’t even try to keep the bubbling rage inside him as Happy carelessly welcomes himself into his bedroom; the only space that he has to himself. The only place that understands him.

“Yes!” Peter cries out, anger coursing through his veins. Fucking hell, he doesn’t have time for this. “Now please— get out!”

Happy, surprised at his outburst, moves backwards until his feet were a mere inches away from Peter’s bedroom door frame. “Okay, okay— I’m glad that you’re okay,” He raises his hands up in retaliation, sighing. “But still, what in the hell happened to you, kid?”

Peter doesn’t answer, instead he ignores the burning pain across his legs while walking towards the door with the goal of closing it. He grits his teeth in the process.

“That’s none of your business.”

 Ma mère pense ’t’es l’homme de sa vie, (My mom thinks that you’re the love of her life,) Moi, j’te donne pas trois semaines pis t’es parti. (Me? I’ll bet that you’ll leave after three weeks.)

 Peter had been genuinely surprised when he had come back home to find May and Happy in the kitchen, flour and eggs scattered everywhere.

Their smiles are bright.

Peter clears his throat, effectively gaining their attention as he crosses his arms across his chest. “What are you guys doing?” He asks, throwing a pointed look at May who just laughs at his question.

“What does it seem like we’re doing, Pete?” She replies, a huge smile still displayed on her face. “We’re trying to bake a cake!”

That still isn’t enough of an answer. “What for?” He adds; from what he remembers— which was almost everything, nobody has their birthdays today.

May just sticks her tongue out at Peter.

“It’s Happy and I’s first month anniversary, babe!”

 S’rais-tu mon père jusqu’à midi? (Will you be my dad till’ noon?) J’me suis mis dans l’trouble pis comme t’es ici. (I got myself in trouble, and now you’re here.)

 Peter curses at himself as he holds his head down in between his arms. 

The principal doesn’t say anything to him as the air remains tense.

“I’m sorry—” Peter’s head pops up at the unexpected voice. That isn’t May. “I had a meeting— I came here as fast as I can.”

Looking to his right, Peter sees Happy taking the chair beside him; his own face stoic.

“That’s alright, Mr. Hogan,” The principal gives him a tight lipped smile. “Now, shall we discuss why I called you here?”

Happy looks at Peter, an eyebrow raised. Peter doesn't— no, he can’t bring himself to say nor explain anything.

Everything is clear.

He had fucked up.

 Ç’a l’air qu’à l’école y auraient trouvé, (It seems that the school has found,) 10 grammes de shit dans mon casier. (The ten grams in my locker.)

 Peter had known that he should’ve been more cautious; he knew that his school had a strict rule against cigarettes. He had known.

However, did that knowledge still stop him from lighting one up?

No.

Is it a surprise that he was caught?

No.

Peter bites his tongue as he tries to even out his breathing.

The next thought passes by his mind and he can’t help but wholeheartedly agree.

I’m a disappointment.

 Faudrait pas l’dire à ma mère, (Please, don’t tell my mom,) Elle s’rait ben capable de trop s’en faire. (She wouldn’t be able to handle it.)

 Happy took him home.

The whole car ride had been silent; neither party focusing more on the road than one another.

Peter forces himself to speak up once Happy has parked his car in front of the brick building.

“Please..” He croaks out, feeling the tears welling up in his eyes. “Don’t tell May.”

God, he hated being like this.

A pause follows, and Peter worries for a second that Happy will spill everything.

However, the man beside him lets out a sigh as he places a hand on Peter’s shoulder.

He squeezes, and for the first time, Peter doesn’t flinch at the touch of a man.

“Don’t worry kid,” Happy says.

“I won’t.’

 Toi, tu sais comme moi qu’on passe par là,  (You know just as well as me that we all go through this,) Quand on devient un homme dans Hochelaga. (That this is how we grow up in Hochelaga.)

 May gives them both a bright smile as they enter the apartment.

“Dinner will be ready in a sec!” She tells them both; giving Peter a warm hug and Happy a peck on the cheek before sprinting back to the kitchen.

Peter just looks up at the man beside him who grew red at his guardian’s antic.

He doesn’t even try to stop the genuine laugh coming out of his throat as Happy looks back at him, trying his best to mask his fondness for May with annoyance. “What?” He scrunches his nose up at Peter, trying to act tough but failing as his flushed face goes against him.

Peter just continues snickering. “Nothing.”

The sudden happiness in his stomach’s overwhelming. 

 S’rais-tu mon père jusqu’à cette nuit? (Will you be my dad until tonight?) J’me souviens même plus quand l’mien est parti. (I don’t even remember when mine left.)

 After dinner, Peter had mustered up the courage to ask both May and Happy if they wanted to watch a movie. They both had said yes— but Peter knew that May never really had a thing for sci-fi movies, and so it isn’t a surprise for him when she had blacked out thirty minutes into ‘The Empire Strikes Back.’

Happy, however, still has his eye focused on the film. In fact, he seems to be enjoying it way more than Peter— which was a complete yet welcomed surprise.

He doesn’t ever remember having witnessed something so nice like this after his passing: May curling up against someone, a smile on her face as she slept; completely serene as the man who she loved cradles her back. It was a sight that pulled at Peter’s heartstrings, yet also tied them into pretty bows at the same time.

As the sounds of the movie fills the air, Peter realizes something which made him smile.

He can get used to this.

 Y avait pas grand temps pour dire « Je t’aime ». (There wasn’t really a lot of time to say “I love you.”) Entre la DPJ pis le HLM. (Between the CSS and the DSS.)  

After that night, May and Happy had started saying “I love you”‘s to one another more often.

He and Happy got closer— and slowly…

Peter let his walls down bit by bit.

 On pourrait p’t’être r’garder la T.V., (Maybe we can watch some TV,) Quand maman rentrera d’son shift au PFK. (When mom does her shift at KFC.)

 “What‘cha doing there, kid?” Happy asks him as he knocks on Peter’s door, slowly pulling it ajar.

Peter looks up from his papers, rubbing at his eyes as he lets out a yawn. He gives Happy a nod to let him know that it’s okay to come in.

The man then walks up beside him, a hand on his hip as he looks over at Peter’s calculations. He makes a face. “Yeah no, if you’re gonna ask help for this stuff, you better ask Tony and not me.”

Peter makes a face at him, not sure if he’s joking or being serious. What is it with him bringing up this Tony dude? He doesn’t even know who he is. 

 “Ask who?” He snorts, shaking his head. “Tony Stark?” He jokes.

“Uh, yeah? Who else?” Happy looks at him like he doesn’t know if Peter’s joking or not. “Tony Stark, billionaire, inventor, Iron-man? AKA the guy that I work for?”

Peter’s eyes widen. “Wait a minute—- this whole time you’ve been talking about Tony Stark and not your like— eccentric best friend?” He lets his jaw touch the floor in shock.

Happy just laughs at him. “Yeah?”

Peter blinks his eyes and shakes his head, and now it suddenly made so much more sense as to why Happy seems to always be in a full suit.

“Anyway,” Happy interrupts Peter’s thoughts, hands going in his pockets. “I was just thinking that you may want to take a break, kid— maybe watch a movie or something before you burn yourself out. Netflix just added Aliens, and May isn’t here.” He raises an eyebrow as his lip quirks up.

Peter’s ears perk up upon hearing the movie title. He’s been dying to watch the movie ever since Happy had suggested it, but most of the time he never got to as May had forbidden him to watch— as she so eloquently put it— “Those disgusting and disturbing movies.”

“Fine, fine—“ He waves off Happy, turning his front back to his desk, trying not to sound too giddy. “Lemme just clean this up.”

“It’s gonna be fun, kid, trust me.”

Peter just shakes his head, a hint of a smile on his face.

Happy turned out to be right.

 Ce serait drôle un jour d’aller jouer aux quilles, (It would be fun to go bowling, one day.) Ç’a l’air qui font ça dans les vraies familles. (It seems like real families do that.)

 May had suggested that they all go bowling one Sunday night.

Happy taught Peter and May how to strike.

Peter doesn’t know if, in the end, it had been a good idea as Happy ended up losing.

Still, Peter appreciates him going out of his way to teach him something that he doesn’t know. 

It had been such a long time since he hasn’t taught himself something.

It was a nice change.

 S’rais-tu mon père pour toute la vie? (Will you be my dad for the rest of time?) L’temps passe, pourtant t’es pas parti. (Time has passed, but you still haven’t left.)

 “Happy anniversary!” May laughs as she hands something to Happy.

It’s been two years since they’ve been together. Peter still can’t believe that time can fly by so fast.

Happy kisses her on the cheek as he pulls out something from his pocket; a small, velvet box.

Peter tries his best not to shake the camera in his hands. He already knew that this was going to happen— hell, he had planned it with Happy himself, but the happiness and excitement bubbles in his stomach and rushes through every limb in his body as Happy gets down on one knee.

If it isn’t for the fact that his eyes are getting teary, he would’ve laughed at May’s shriek.

“Will you, May—“

Happy didn’t even get to finish his sentence.

“Yes!”

 Moi, j’suis fatigué de jouer au tough. (I’m tired of acting tough.) J’ai dans l’ventre une carrière de roches. (My stomach is full of rocks.)

 Peter stumbles into his bedroom through his window, chest-heaving as he takes off his homemade mask. He grits his teeth as he continues applying pressure onto the wound, closing his window with one of his legs.

He hears a stack of papers drop.

Peter quickly whips his head around.

Happy’s face, morphing into shock— then disbelief, then concern, then rage, greets him back.

“Is this what you’ve been doing, sneaking out all these years?” He asks Peter, gaze hard and almost deadly. 

Happy rarely gets angry.

“Yes,” Peter wheezes as he stands upright; his lungs screaming for more oxygen. He winces as he continues putting pressure on the wound on his left shoulder. “I know, I know— I’m sorry but I’m—“

Happy quickly notices his discomfort. He drops his disapproving parental act for a moment and goes on full mother hen mode. “What— what is it, kid? What happened?” He moves towards Peter’s side in less than a second and Peter let’s his tired and aching body fall onto him.

“Bullet grazed me,” were the only words that he had managed to spew out through the pain.

Happy inhales a breath. “Do you have a first aid kit in here somewhere?”

“Under— under my bed.” Peter groans as Happy slowly let’s him sit on the ground; pain pulsating in his arm.

Within seconds, Happy has a needle in his hand and Peter’s trying his best not to wince nor flinch every time the sharp metal goes through his skin.

There was a pause— and then;

“I think it’s time for you to meet him.”

Peter looks up at Happy, making eye contact. 

The man’s eyes are glassy.

“Who?”

Another pause. Happy lets out a sigh.

“Tony.”

Peter shakes his head. “Why?”

Happy breaks eye contact as he sets the medical instrument back down in the box.

“Because you need to know that you aren’t alone, kid.”

 Pis comme c’est ma fête le mois prochain, (And since it’s my birthday next month,) M’emmènerais-tu voir une game des Canadiens? (Will you take me to a game and lunch?)

 Meeting Tony Stark had been an experience, to say the least.

An experience that had ended with a brand new suit.

 As Happy drives back home, Peter’s body shakes with excitement.

 Once they’re both parked, Peter almost bursts open the car door— but Happy has locked it before he can even try.

“Happy?” Peter asks, an eyebrow raised. “Can you open the door?”

Happy’s hands fell from the steering wheel and onto his own lap.

“Listen, kid,” He starts, clearing his throat. “When I told Tony about you— I didn’t think that he would, you know—“ He waves his hand towards the metallic suitcase on Peter’s lap.

Peter, not a clue as to where the conversation is going, doesn’t respond.

“I just—“ Happy sighs. “You’re a smart kid. I have absolute faith in you and what you do.”

“I trust you, Peter…” Happy looks back at him, making eye contact. His voice wavers.

Peter swallows the lump in his throat. He ignores the familiar feeling of tears welling up in his eyes as Happy says one last thing;

“Just… be safe. Please.”

 Pis si personne entend pis que c’est juste une fois… (And if no one else hears, and it’s just once...)

 The wedding had been extravagant.

May had been wearing the white dress that his grandmother had worn; a family tradition, she had said.

Happy had worn his best suit.

Families and friends had attended. Joyful music had played.

A few of the Avengers had even showed up, wishing them both happiness.

As Peter clicks through the pictures that had been taken, a warm feeling blossoms in his chest upon seeing a specific one.

It’s a picture of him, May and Happy. The two adults were showing off their rings to the camera as both of their arms were wrapped around Peter’s shoulders, squeezing him into a one armed hug in between them both. All three of them had their lips curled up into the brightest smiles that they had ever had.

It’s his favourite.

 Voudrais-tu que j’t’appelle papa? (Would you want me to call you dad?)

Peter looks at the black packet in his hand.

He shakes his head and promptly throws it to the garbage can.

Peter then swings himself home, going through his window as always to get inside. Today had been an uneventful day.

As he takes off his suit, someone knocks on his door. “Hey kid, you free for a bit? We wanna show you something.” Happy calls out.

“Just a sec!” Peter replies, putting on a hoodie and pajama pants.

As soon as he’s done he walks to the living room, seeing May and Happy on the sofa with a pile of papers on the coffee table.

Peter quirks an eyebrow. “What? Is this some sort of test?”

“No, Pete,” May chuckles at him, shaking her head. She intertwines her arm with Happy’s. “Just… sit down, will you?”

Peter does as he’s told, sitting down onto the armchair adjacent to the sofa that Happy and May are both sitting in. “Well?” He asks as soon he plops down.

Happy clears his throat. “Well—“ He starts, placing a hand on top of May’s hand. “Your Aunt— that is, if you want to call her your aunt and not… I don’t know, your mo—“

Before Happy can even finish his sentence, Peter stands up. His eyes landing and focusing themselves on the papers.

There, written in big, bold letters are the words: ADOPTION FORM.

May, upon his sudden reaction, untangles her arm from Happy’s and instead places a hand on top of Peter’s. “You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to, Pete—“

Peter looks up at May, and this time, he lets the tears fall free.

Instantly, May’s arms are around him— and it didn’t take long before Happy’s own are around him too.

“Peter? Are you okay?” May fumbles with her words, unsure on how to address his sudden outburst. “We don’t have to—“

“No,” Peter replies as he lifts his head up from their arms. “I— I want to.”

Happy, still unsure, pipes up. “Are… are you sure, kid? I mean, I understand that maybe it’s a bit too fast—“

Peter just shakes his head. He’s sobbing, but his whole body is filled with joy and excitement and glee and he’s so sure that he wants this. 

“I am,” He says, as May and Happy wipe the tears off of his face.

“A hundred percent.” He smiles.

and as always, requests are open! pls don’t forget to like and reblog, thank you! :]

#lily’s lil’ stories #peter parker #spiderman #happy hogan #may parker #tony stark #fanfic #harold happy hogan #happy x may #happy hogan x may parker #marvel #aunt may #aunt may x happy

[minaminokyoko]

Spider-Man: Far from Home--A Spoilertastic Review

Oh, my baby boy is back and it feels good.

Like many of you, I was looking forward to FFH due to the trauma left behind by our final film with all the Avengers present, and I needed to see my sweet Spider Son to try to dry my tears. I'm happy to say Far from Home is just the popcorn flick we need this summer: light, enjoyable, fun. I do admit to a bias right off the bat, before I begin the review: I am one of the hugest fans of the Iron Dad and Spider Son dynamic, and so I knew by default that I wasn't going to like this movie as much as the first one. Sorry. I am a skank for adopted family tropes, and I think Iron Dad and Spider Son was one of the strongest relationships developed in the MCU period. Losing Tony is just...agonizing. I've sectioned it off in my brain as Did Not Happen just to get by, honestly, and so keep that in mind as we proceed.

Spoilers ahead.

Overall Grade: B

Pros:

-Lemme get this out of the way: MY SONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN MY SPIDER SON OH MY GOSH PETER PARKER IS SUCH A GOOD BOI AND A SWEET SMOL BEAN AND I HAVE NO MATERNAL INSTINCTS EXCEPT WHEN IT COMES TO MCU PETER PARKER AND I LOVE THIS CHILD MORE THAN ANYTHING AND I JUST WANT TO PROTECT HIM AND HUG HIM AND BRUSH HIS HAIR AND COOK HIM DINNER I LOVE MY LITTLE BOY Y'ALL.

-Ahem. Tom Holland still shines in this role. I really, solidly care about Peter Parker. He's a great kid and he's very realistic in the way that he's written and acted. He's just a shy, awkward little nerd with a heart of gold who unfortunately has been forced into the worst situations that he's not ready for. I wanted to punch "Nick" in the face for how much goddamn pressure he put on a kid who is literally still in the goddamn mourning process just like everyone else. Peter has so much to deal with and he's only had these powers for a short amount of time, so it's natural that he's so frustrated and anxious and he wants time to go after things that are important to him. I found that very understandable and sympathetic, even if the "I just want to be normal" trope has been done to death in superhero media. MCU Peter has so much heart and I'm proud of this baby for what he's able to accomplish.

-The allusions to Tony and the void left behind hit home quite hard. Especially that fucking gravestone part of the Mysterio sequence. That was just...cruel. Tony taught Peter so much, and he genuinely loved that kid. He grew to love him and trust him and worry about him, and it's so awful that Tony won't get to see him grow up to be his own man. I'm grateful for the time they had together, and I really love Tony leaving Peter the glasses and the A.I., knowing that while he might still make a mistake, he would do the right thing in the end. (Side note: EDITH is as funny as it is fucked up, "Even Dead, I'm the Hero." God fucking damn you, Tony, that is so in-character and it hurts my soul.) "Nick" shoving all that pressure onto Peter made me want to kick his ass, especially since he talks down to him and tries to blame him for not being ready when he only just got into the game relatively speaking. But I also loved the sequence of him in the plane doing exactly what Tony used to do in his lab. It's such a great parallel, showing that Peter is his own person but he's also a chip off the old block, and that is very sweet to see. (I also squealed at the Led Zeppelin comment, oh my son, such a cutie.)

-I was extremely hesitant about them choosing Gyllenhaal for the role of Mysterio (not because of his skill as an actor, just because he looks like a giant puppy, sorry) but now I see why. He's an unstable narcissist and it fits him. What a jerkoff. I was furious with how callous he was and how he shifted blame everywhere like it's just SO necessary to kill all these people for fame, fortune, and money. Ugh, what a shitbird. So kudos to him. I didn't think he could pull it off, but he sure as hell did.

-The effects were fantastic. I really do think the illusion sequence will go down in MCU history as one of the most visually creative, disorienting, heartbreaking things we've seen so far in the saga. It was harrowing, especially the Iron Man suit crawling out of the grave. What a kick in the fucking nuts for Peter, and for us.

-Peter and MJ, while it did get a little overwhelming, were cute as shit. And I'm glad that the modern films are removing the stigma of the "I can't let my family and friends know I'm the hero" thing. It was definitely heavily done in the 80's, 90's, and early to mid 2000's and I'm fine to see it being phased out at least in terms of the MCU. It's a little more realistic that most of your family or friends would be able to handle your secret, and not only that, help you out on occasion. I'm glad she knows and their kisses were freaking adorable. Sweet babies.

-That. First. End. Credits. Scene. What a fucking killer. First off, God bless whoever at Marvel Studios listened to the thousands of fans begging them to cast J. K. Simmons as J. Jonah Jameson again, continuity be damned. The man IS the embodiment of the character, and I absolutely fucking ADORE that they gave us the nod and the wink we all wanted even back when Spidey was Andrew Garfield. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Next, oh my God, my sweet baby boy, my smol bean, got called out and branded as a murderer. Fuck, this is gonna be a serious problem, and considering the fact that we don't have the next MCU film lined up yet (at the time this was posted, and mind you, San Diego Comic Con is in two weeks, so maybe they'll clarify) the consequences could definitely be crazy. Poor Peter. He's gonna have a lot of work to do in order to undo this mess and prove that he's not Spidey, but this could also mean they're adapting some part of the Civil War story, maybe. We'll see, but that was a big ass bomb to drop.

-The Skrulls second credit scene was a genuine surprise, and it made sense. I thought Nick felt a little off the whole movie, and that really does explain why--it's someone else doing an impression of him and trying their best. Nick would've been smart enough to know probably right off the bat that Beck wasn't who he said he was. His story was way too noble and convenient. Nick would've probably have run facial recognition and then it would ping for a former Stark Industries employee, and that would've been a wrap. I like that it being a Skrull justifies what would be a plothole. Neat idea.

-I appreciated the Spidey's eye view of the action. Those were some cool shots and they were centered well, so you didn't feel nauseous or anything. It kept you in the action and was very engrossing and cool.

Cons:

-The bystander syndrome that everyone got this time around is a little irksome. It's the same reason that while I really, really love Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2, I default don't like it as much as the first one since everyone got put into the bystander spot except for basically Peter in the very end. While it was nice to have them defend themselves, I'd have liked it more of MJ and Ned and the others figured their own way out of escaping the drones. Why? Because it would show Peter that it's not always on just his shoulders. His friends are competent and they can help, and I think that would've been a better way to go rather than him doing it himself.

-Some of the humor was flat. JB Smooth and the other teacher are the worst offenders, I'd say. They were given too much screentime and they're not that funny.

-The May and Happy subplot goes almost nowhere and isn't fully explored, and I kind of would've been fine if it hadn't been in the movie at all. It doesn't add much.

-The ending was kind of unclear? Did Beck actually get shot and die from his wounds? If so, then what was the official story about the drones and his body and whatnot? It's all pretty damn vague. If Beck is dead, that's disappointing. I kinda wish Marvel would stop killing the villains at the end of almost all the films. Longest running recurring villains are Loki and Thanos, I think. Vulture lived, and I'd like him to return in the future if possible. You can use actors more than once, Marvel, they're not tissue paper.

-Nitpick: It did almost feel like we missed a movie where Peter likes MJ. She was more a cameo in the first one than a full lead, so it almost felt like there's a short film somewhere of them getting closer and him getting over Liz and liking MJ instead.

-Nitpick: Same with the whole "other guy also likes MJ" subplot. Eh, I could leave it out and not miss it.

-Nitpick: I still can't with how they expect anyone to buy that Night Monkey story. I mean, it's black suited Spidey no matter which way you look at it. And yes, people should immediately notice he's at the very least one of the students at Peter's high school, and then it can't be too hard after that. I mean, Peter doesn't even change his voice while he's in the suit.

-Nitpick: I was kind of hoping for more clues or reactions to half of everyone, you know, being fucking murdered by Thanos for five years and returning to their lives. But I guess that was just pushed aside because it could become a whole rabbit hole issue. Still, though, I was hoping someone would tell us if the Snapped just don't remember being dead or if there is some kind of afterlife they experienced. (Side note: wow, holy shit, the teacher's mini story about it was dark and awful but I did laugh out of shock. I mean, damn. Low blow, wifey. Low fucking blow.)

-They mention spidey sense but I'd have liked it if they explicitly explain why he has it sometimes but other times he doesn't? It seems to fluctuate, but why and how? Is it more like anxiety or an extra sense? Is it based on his emotional health? I want clarification.

All in all, I had a good time and I'd put this in the middlegrade MCU films. I still really enjoy Holland in the role and I want nothing but good things for him and this franchise.

#spider-man #spider-man far from home #far from home #movie review #film review #spoilers #spoiler alert #iron dad #spider son

[dailybuglenow]

TUESDAY, 13 AUGUST 2023. EDITED BY J. JONAH JAMESON.

THE TRAGEDY IN TIMES SQUARE: MUTANTS & TERRORISM

TW: The article contains anti-mutant rhetoric that could be considered offensive

Some things are never meant to be. In the last week since I wrote my piece on the decimation of mutants Post-Cleanse ( see our august 7th issue for full coverage ) I’ve received a fair share of negative comments that I was not giving mutants a chance or my words were generalizing and hateful. I, personally, was not offensive. It’s my job to report the news and if that gets people talking it’s good. It’s on this side of a terrible tragedy though that I see I am now justified in my beliefs. Yesterday at approximately 1700 hours energy spikes were reported in Times Square. A popular New York tourist trap, the few blocks that it encompasses statistics show an average of 330,000 - 460, 000 visitors daily. News of this energy spike should have been reported to the Avengers instantly due to the high number of civilians, but it was instead the mutant X-Men who arrived at the scene to handle the situation internally. Recognized among the group was not one but two Cyclops (Scott Summers), the Wolverine (James ‘Logan’ Howlett) and two Icemen (Robert Drake). Also in the group was an unidentified man with Wolverine like claws, a telepathic man with a golden energy beam, a silver haired speedster, an unidentified who looked surprisingly like the deceased Pietro Maximoff and a woman in a baseball cap that some onlookers said looked like the Avenger Wanda Maximoff. Please see page two for elaboration on the potential presence of Maximoff.

Leading this merry band of mutant terrorists was Erik Lehnsherr, a man known as Magneto who has often been painted as the bad guy in your history books. Lehnsherr has, as of late, been residing on the mutant island nation of Krakoa and is believed to be in the Hellfire Club, headed by one Emma Frost. Next to him was Jean Grey, an original founding member of the X-Men who passed in the late 1980′s for reasons undisclosed but has been present in the last five years. All of these mutants stood against the 21 year old mutant Jean Grey ( not the one who was deceased ). Before going into the conflict, I have to ask my readers: how are the X-Men duplicating themselves? Are they clones? There’s no one worse to clone than a mutant, that’s for sure. The double appearance of Iceman, Cyclops and Grey raise some valid questions but the doppelgängers are surprisingly not the worst part of this situation. It was the younger Ms. Grey who seemed to be the problem. Early reports from the tragedy state that Ms. Grey arrived shortly before the other mutants did and seemed to be talking to herself and agitated. When the X-squad or whatever they like to be called these days arrived they attempted to talk to Ms. Grey before she lashed out and attacked. After that it appeared to be an all-out brawl with some civilians being escorted to safety and others being left behind and in danger. Photos and videos taken on site show something beautiful, terrible and disgusting. The pretty colors and swooping mutants may look like something out of an action movie but they were not superheroes. They were abominations with very little regard to human life.

Within the course of 45 minutes Ms. Grey managed to incapacitate most of the group and nearly killed a good deal of them, including the elder Ms. Grey. The conflict was only ended when Mr. Howlett managed to stab Ms. Grey through the chest, effectively stopping her attack. There was then an explosion that caused tremors and shattered windows as far down as the West Village. The explosion manifested itself in the shape of a giant bird made of fire, with reports stating it was picked up by satellites globally. In an exclusive video taken by an onlooker Grey’s body can be seen prone on the ground at the center of the blast radius. This video contains graphic imagery but can be found on the Daily Bugle webpage. Grey was later confirmed to be deceased, but Lehnsherr had fled the scene with her body before ambulances or reporters arrived. All of the mutants conveniently left, actually, before they had to answer for their actions to the public. Though it came as a surprise to this humble supporter, Mr. Lehnsherr responded to our requests for a statement. He advised the Bugle, “What happened in Times Square can only be described as a tragedy, as I am sure you have all already concluded on your own. Jean Grey lost control and it was our job to help her and control the damage to the best of our ability. It was never her intention to cause harm to either our kind or yours. In the end a decision was made, one that ended not with us helping her but with us taking her down. These were the decisions and actions of a small group who took the situation into their own hands. We will never know if the situation could have ended differently, but the city is safe now as it stands. Even though Jean paid for it with her life. Her body was immediately taken to the Island of Krakao after the incident and will remain there until a proper ceremony is planned in her honor. She will be missed.”

It wasn’t her intention. A rather weak excuse considering the irreparable damage that has been done. Hate is the last thing that we need to promote in a world like this one, one rocked by prejudice and both literal and figurative monsters. What happened in Times Square last night is, by all means, an act of terror against those who couldn’t defend themselves in a gross disregard. Property damage around the area has yet to be assessed by damage control services, but several theaters in the area and other restaurants and museums have been shut down for the foreseeable future with companies promising to get them up and running again as soon as possible. Some onlookers spoke of a voice in their ear forcing them to fight one another, but that ended as soon as Grey was fatally attacked. As many as two dozen civilians have been confirmed as deceased with up to a hundred injured and currently being checked at Mt. Sinai hospitals around the island. If you have a loved one who has not been accounted for yet, please call the Bugle Hotline to connect with others and authorities. 

Regarded as a leader on the island of Krakoa - which is a whole subject of suspicion all together - Ms. Emma Frost also released an official statement for the Hellfire Club and the mutants of the nation. Ms. Frost went on record saying, “We hate to see history repeat itself, but sometimes it does. The world has never been kind to mutants but we aren’t prone to pity ourselves or perceived injustices. Instead we plan and we protect our own, which we attempted to do here. The Hellfire Club was not made aware of the plan to subdue Miss Grey due to the urgency of the situation, but we will not persecute our friends and family where no persecution is due. An action of a man is not limited to one finite moment in time and while Logan Howlett has chosen to not speak with the media for obvious reasons and a general lack of interest in a witch hunt, his actions were understandable. The same goes for still living Jean Grey, long a staple member of the community. Both are acting as Co-Headmasters of the Jean Grey School for Higher Learning and would not take the loss of a student lightly. Tragedy is tragedy and we would never deny that. We will, however, remain thankful that the blast radius was not as deadly as it could have been. At this time we ask that the general public leave Krakoa to process this and the loss of one so young. As stated, her body will remain on the island until buried and there is no intent to turn it over to the United States government. We are mutants and we will do as we must. Any further questions or concerns can be direct to Briar Raleigh and we will respond at our discretion and convenience.”

After all we know about Frost and Lehnsherr it’s hard to take either of them at their word. Magneto has often been seen going against the X-Men, so his supposed grief at the loss of one seems to be a cheap act. Frost is held in higher regards due to her work with children, but her ascension to the throne in the long rumored and formerly secret Hellfire Club has swayed public perception away from her favor. Regardless, it is the ever steady former acting president Senator Robert Kelly who has weighed in on the incident. “We need to call things as the are,” he told a solemn crowd at the site of the incident this morning. “We’ve always needed to call things what they were but we never wanted to. We got caught up in mutant rights when there should be no such things. Mutants are not human. They don’t pretend to be. Mutants are as much human as Thanos was. Their bodies do not belong and they are a danger to others and clearly themselves as well. Had they truly cared about the American people a problem of this magnitude would have been reported so inhibitor collars and Sentinel Services could have been present to deescalate the situation. If an animal attacks a human they’re put down. Ms. Grey should have been put down long before she was able to do as much harm as she was. The innocent people who died today won’t get brought back, so  I truly hope Jean Grey feels the weight of those souls wherever she is. I’ll be speaking directly to President Ellis about the incident and reaching out to the Avengers for their compliance in helping to control this dilemma that is haunting the American people. In the meantime, hold your loved ones close. Watch your back when you’re on the street. America is no longer safe as long as mutants run free.”

What happened is a tragedy. No one can deny that. It doesn’t matter if you side with the mutants or the humans. Lives were lost and people were  fractured. Once again we have to rebuild from an incident that never should have occurred. Today I wrote this article with a heavy heart. I pray I don’t have to write another tomorrow. 

—- Gayle Rogers, Daily Bugle News

A FAMILY AFFAIR:

As mentioned above, photos from the incident in Time Square place a woman who looks remarkably like Wanda Maximoff was spotted on site. Maximoff, an Avenger since 2015, has had a rather rocky career in the limelight due to her attack on Lagos and later status as a war criminal along with Steve Rogers. A confirmed victim of the Cleanse, Maximoff returned and was soon associated again with the Avengers after being pardoned for her international crimes. Interestingly enough, another figure at the scene was a silver haired speedster who resembled Maximoff’s deceased twin brother Pietro, who was a casualty of the Ultron attack in Sokovia also in 2015. The presence of the Maximoff twins lines up only when you remember the fact that they are the children of Erik Lehnsherr, a fact known by the public despite a lack of official acknowledgement by any of the three. The Maximoff involvement would be another strike against the Scarlet Witch as the Avengers have purposefully remained out of mutant affairs so far. A representative for Maximoff or the Avengers could not be reached.

IN OTHER NEWS:

Public opinion polls have shown that reception to our new Captain American, Sam Wilson, is currently lower than that of Steve Rogers before he put down the shield. People have cited that they lack the familiarity with Wilson that they had with Rogers while others could not list a specific reasons. Some have wondered if the lack of interest is due to the turbulent history of the shield as of late or due to more racially charged matters. There’s been no word from Wilson on the matter.

Everyone’s favorite Champions were spotted in Libya recently as shown by the news and social media posts. They continue to take the world by storm with their modern way of reaching their audience and social justice causes. Ms. Marvel and Spider-man ( not the red and blue one )  were recently seen in Manhattan along with a few other members of the team taking selfies before having to leave on a mission. We’re rooting for you, Champions!

What is Krakoa? There will be an academic lecture at New York University on Thursday with Dr. Kate Peterson and Dr. Edward Busha to discuss the political implications of a mutant nation on a social and economic level. Tickets are being sold in advance and at the door.

General Thaddeus Ross is currently traveling to Latveria to meet with their leader, Victor Von Doom. This coincides with meetings the United States Government are scheduled to have with Wakanda this week following the return of the perviously snapped King T’Challa.

#daily bugle news #all #mutants #daily buzz #gayle rodgers

[aion-rsa]

Marvel's What If: The Stories We'd Like to See

https://ift.tt/2HjKQlR

The new animated series will show us alternate takes on the Marvel Cinematic Universe's timeline. Here are scenarios for every Marvel movie.

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This Marvel article contains spoilers.

When Disney+ hits, one of the many shows tying into the Marvel Cinematic Universe is What If, set to be on-demand in summer 2021. The show will be animated, albeit using many of the actors from the various MCU movies. Based on the What If comic series, which was created in the '70s, the anthology series has a pretty basic concept: take an important part of Marvel history, zig when the original story zagged, and then write a story out of that.

For instance, the comic had an issue where Spider-Man saw the thief who would eventually kill Uncle Ben run by and figured that stopping him would be good PR. He unknowingly saved Uncle Ben’s life in this scenario, but he didn’t learn any major lesson about power and responsibility. Instead, he became a more self-centered ass whose ego was so out of hand as a media personality that he caused a disgraced J. Jonah Jameson to found the Sinister Six as a revenge ploy.

In the case of the new animated series, the stories will be based on the movies’ continuity. So far, we know that one of them will be about Agent Carter receiving the super-soldier serum treatment instead of Steve Rogers.

That got me thinking about what other stories we can get from the movies. I’ve decided to take every Marvel movie and brainstorm a What If scenario that would work for each. Play along at home! It’s fun!

IRON MAN

What If Tony Stark Died?

The story of the movie ends where it should have begun. Tony Stark and his military entourage are under attack and a bomb goes off near Stark. The shrapnel cuts too close to his heart and there’s nothing that can be done. Obadiah Stane takes over the company. Maybe Pepper, Happy, and/or Rhodey investigate and take him down. Maybe not.

What’s important is that Iron Man can no longer be the focal point of the MCU. Presumably, things are going to get really, really bad. Especially with that time the High Council tried to nuke New York City. Then again, greedy as he is, Stane would be on Earth���s side during that conflict and could probably at least lend some kind of hand.

In a world without Stark, I can’t help but think of what all those villains created BECAUSE of Stark would be like. Imagine Loki conquering Earth and being undone by the likes of Stane, Vanko, Killian, Vulture, and Mysterio. Not Hammer, though. He’d still be a total weasel and would try to betray them at the first attempt.

INCREDIBLE HULK

What If Abomination Joined the Avengers?

A plot thread the MCU movies played with briefly before writing it off in a Blu-ray short was the idea of The Incredible Hulk's Emil Blonsky being roped into joining the Avengers. Obviously, he ended up getting nixed because he kind of went on a big rampage through Harlem, but maybe if things went down differently, he would be found less accountable...at least in the beginning.

Before Bruce Banner gets his treatment from Sterns, he might find out about all the horrible experiments he was working on and that would set off the Hulk. A surviving Sterns would still gladly transform Blonsky, only this time Blonsky would be seen as a hero for putting his body on the line so he can bring down the Hulk. With the military behind him, he’s able to win and keeps his dark side in check enough that he’s able to work with the government and be their personal weapon of mass destruction.

The way I see it, this could go very wrong during the events of Avengers. The team is going to be at each other’s throats as is, but in the original version, they were still good people. When there’s a psychopath in the midst, this can only end badly.

Poor Cap, finding out that this guy is his legacy.

IRON MAN 2

What If Iron Man Wanted to Avenge His Father?

When in doubt, go with the Soviet-controlled alternate reality. Worked for Superman and Valiant Comics. It would certainly work for Iron Man 2. 

In this scenario, Anton Vanko is able to keep his intentions to himself long enough to screw over Howard Stark, bring the arc reactor schematics to the Motherland, and reap the rewards. Ivan lives a life of luxury while Howard Stark becomes a disgraced figure in the American public’s eye, ultimately destroying himself through alcoholism.

This leads to a story where Tony Stark figures out his father's tech in order to wage a war against the Vankos for destroying his family. Add in Justin Hammer as his weasely sidekick and you got a stew going.

THOR

What If Loki Allowed Thor to Be King?

Loki was the first real “villain who was in the right, but went about it the wrong way” of the MCU. At least in the first act. One of the better parts of Thor was that, in the beginning, Thor was a big jerk and Loki was well aware of this. His initial plot was the save Asgard from having to deal with Thor in charge. Said plot gave Thor the character development needed to prove himself worthy while Loki ended up damning himself.

Loki probably could have done himself a better service if he just let it happen. When Thor runs Asgard into the ground, Loki will be there to take over and fix things. Or maybe Thor will just admit that he isn’t fit to lead and hand over the throne. Either way, the big laugh will come from someone telling Loki that if he knew Thor was going to be such a shitty king, why didn’t he do anything about it?

CAPTAIN AMERICA

What If Captain America Survived World War II?

Seems to be one of the easiest ideas. Hell, this was one of the very first issues of the What If comic and even gave us the first iteration of Bucky Barnes as Captain America. So we have Captain America defeat Red Skull in such a way that he doesn’t have to crash the plane and get frozen for a bunch of years at the end of the movie. Instead, Captain America fights through the rest of the war and we don’t have all that awkward finger-pointing that Steve gets for his Endgame epilogue.

read more: The 100 Best Marvel What If Moments

I’d like to see Cap be in the thick of Hydra’s inner-takeover of SHIELD, especially with Bucky still alive and looming in the shadows. Not only am I down for more team-ups between Steve Rogers and Howard Stark, but the idea of Cap being something of an uncle figure to Tony is too great to ignore.

THE AVENGERS

What If Loki Betrayed Thanos?

Recently, Marvel made it an official retcon that, during the events of the first Avengers movie Loki wasn’t 100% himself. Wielding the Mind Stone, he was really being manipulated by Thanos, which is their way of handwaving all the horrible stuff he did so we can more easily get behind him as a protagonist.

This reminds me of Marvel’s Earth X miniseries, which took place in a universe where all the god-type characters were really overly-evolved mutants from another planet who were endlessly powerful but were molded by the beliefs of others. In other words, all the Asgardians are scaling back their power and acting like Asgardians because when they came to Earth, that’s what humans believed them to be. Loki, being all about trickery and mischief, was the one who could see through it all and realized what he truly was.

I want that kind of energy in the Avengers storyline. I want Loki to figure out that he isn’t in full control of his actions. When Thor implores him to join him against the higher power, let Loki piece it together. The image of Loki working with the Avengers against Thanos is a cool one, but the real conflict is figuring out what to do from there. Whether or not he’s on their side, nobody’s going to trust Loki when the plan is presumably, “Let’s use these two Infinity Stones against a guy who has none.”

IRON MAN 3

What If Aldrich Killian Killed Himself?

Iron Man 3 begins with an origin for Aldrich Killian as the third most interesting character to call himself “The Mandarin.” He got to meet Tony Stark briefly at a New Years’ Eve party, Stark lied by offering to meet him on the roof later that night, and it was at midnight that Killian realized that Stark had essentially blown him off. He considered walking off the roof to his death, but was instead inspired to get his shit together and start up a big arms-dealing conspiracy.

Let’s take him out of the picture. There’s no Extremis plot, no drunk actors, no Vice President getting arrested, etc. This also means that Tony doesn’t get grounded. Part of the conclusion of Iron Man 3 is that Tony is able to grow up and move on in a sense.

People often criticize the MCU for ways it's walked back Tony's growth over the years, though. Tony’s attempt to move forward blows up in his face with Ultron, and thanks to his addictive personality, he can’t help but go back to his Iron Man ways and briefly kill his relationship with Pepper. Even in Endgame, he struggles with what kind of man he should be.

Perhaps the lack of Iron Man 3 would hinder his journey in the long run. He doesn’t blow up his armor or get his arc reactor removed. He keeps being as reckless and dedicated as he’s ever been. It costs him his relationships, but does the ends justify the means? How far can a driven Stark go, exactly?

THOR: THE DARK WORLD

What If Jane Foster Discovered Her Worthiness Earlier?

Granted, we don’t know the context of Jane Foster becoming the new Thor in Thor: Love and Thunder, but it’s going to happen in the upcoming movie, it’s happened in the comics, and it even happened in one of the first What If comic issues. Thor: The Dark World is one of the least exciting MCU entries and Natalie Portman peaced out due to how they handled her character, so let’s jump ahead to the Jane-Thor development.

read more: Thor: Love and Thunder - Jane Foster as Thor Explained

Jane’s already in Asgard for the underdeveloped Meet the Parents concept, so the setting is right. Maybe have her wield Mjolnir to save Frigga and see where it goes from there. I don’t know. It’s not like the villains are going to carry this story.

CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER

What If Nick Fury Died?

The threat from Winter Soldier is such a Gordian knot, and thanks in part to Nick Fury’s help, Hydra was defeated in a rather clean way. Take Fury out of the picture. There is no secret resurrection. He’s straight-up dead. Now there’s no finale based on releasing all the SHIELD files to the public and cutting off Hydra’s head.

Captain America and his buddies still defeat Hydra, but it’s messy. Hell, we might even get the Agents of SHIELD crew involved in this one because why not. Alexander Pierce may be killed or at least thwarted, but the story after the fact will be that Captain America is an enemy of the state, creating a variation of his Secret Avengers from Infinity War.

GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY

What If Ronan Destroyed Xandar?

What If was made for this one. Guardians of the Galaxy plays up Ronan’s disdain for Thanos and the possibility of them throwing down. Early on, Nebula warns Ronan that it’s a fight that he cannot win, but is totally on his side when he’s able to wield the Power Stone. It’s promised that once Xandar is wiped out, Ronan is going to go to war with Thanos.

read more: Marvel's What If? Animated Series Coming to Disney+

A full-on villain vs. villain war would be a damn fun episode. Obviously, like an arms race, each side is going to have to try to build themselves up with more Infinity Stones, presumably making it three-on-three by the time the two throw down. Don’t know how the Soul Stone would figure into this, but depending on how close Ronan and Nebula become...PROBABLY not good for Nebula!

AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON

What If Ultron Wasn’t Corrupted?

More specifically, the question is, “Could it have worked?” The creation of Ultron was Stark’s desperate attempt to protect Earth from a threat that he knew, deep in his heart, was going to come from the skies any day now. Ultron ended up blowing up in his face and caused the Avengers to splinter prior to Thanos’ run for the Stones. Had the plan worked out, Thanos would still need to invade Earth in order to get his hands on the Mind Stone and Time Stone.

As an aside: Thor doesn't know where the Time Stone is, so I figure he'll trust the Mind Stone to remain on Earth under Stark's care because he's already established that he doesn't want to keep two in Asgard.

While the previous entry is more about two villains clashing, this one is about a war between faceless soldiers. Endless dog creatures fighting endless Ultrons or empty Iron Man armors or whatever. Win or lose, this one has the potential to cause more worldwide damage than Thanos’ casual stroll through Wakanda.

ANT-MAN

What If Hank Pym Trusted Hope?

Hank Pym doesn’t choose Scott Lang to be his successor in Ant-Man. Maybe Scott’s still in prison. Or maybe Hope is his first choice after all. Either way, he builds Hope her own Wasp costume for the sake of stopping Darren Cross. She’s hindered by her inferior cat burglar skills but ends up being a bit colder and violent when it comes to ending Cross’ plans.

The real conflict comes in Civil War. Wasp is very much on Captain America’s side, but Tony Stark tries to get through to Hank Pym on the subject. Hank begins to waver, realizing that as much as he’s hated his technology being in the government’s hands, it still might be safer than what Cross had intended. This, in turn, causes Hope to resent her father all over again as the war between heroes commences.

CAPTAIN AMERICA: CIVIL WAR

What If Quicksilver Was Alive?

This is technically more of an Age of Ultron entry, but with a focus on Civil War. Quicksilver is able to save Hawkeye’s life without sacrificing his own. It’s hard figuring out a good switch for Civil War, but including Quicksilver in the mix might be the biggest offset. The shadow of Sokovia would still be looming, but at least he'd be there to help prevent his sister from becoming a black mark on superheroes.

Not only would he help turn the tide in the airport battle, but if Pietro were to be there for the final battle, he’d possibly be able to talk Iron Man down. I mean, Tony Stark is arguably equally or more responsible for the deaths of Pietro and Wanda’s parents than Bucky was for Tony’s parents, but Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch are able to move past that. Quicksilver can fix the Avengers before Zemo is able to splinter them.

DOCTOR STRANGE

What If Doctor Strange Used Time Travel to Save Himself?

Stephen Strange takes a look at Dormammu and decides, “Nope!” He’s going to use the Time Stone to prevent the universe from being taken over, but he goes about it in a more reckless way. He rewinds time to the point that he’s able to stop Kaecilius using magic save-states, which he figures takes Dormammu off the board. Deciding that the other magic folks can carry on without him, he then attempts to prevent himself from texting while driving.

Strange continues on with his earlier life, the mega-demon is no longer a threat, and life goes on. Or does it?

Strange was warned that overusing the Time Stone would cause massive repercussions, so things would undoubtedly go very wrong for the Sorcerer Supreme. Bonus points if this relates to Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness.

GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOL. 2

What If Ego Raised Peter Quill on Earth?

Ego was never going to be anything other than a monster. Charming or not, he killed a whole lot of his own children as part of his plot to kill just about everyone else in the name of finding his purpose. His redeeming quality was that he had some true love for Meredith Quill, but he didn't love her enough to keep himself from being an outright bastard. He was afraid that his love for her would keep him from achieving his goal, so he killed her in a rather cowardly way for someone so powerful.

I want to see a world where Ego saw things through and stayed with Meredith for good. What kind of person would he have become? I imagine he would have grown old, died of natural causes, and his body would have regenerated on his planet self, presumably with second thoughts on what to do with his powers. It's not too different from the Fantastic Four storyline where they turned Galactus human for a time and showed him the beauty of normal life.

But really, I'd like to see what kind of man Peter would become. I can't imagine he'd be drawn to the stars if his mother had lived longer and he wasn't kidnapped, but cosmic adventure is in his blood. Who's to say?

SPIDER-MAN: HOMECOMING

What If Spider-Man Joined the Vulture?

Getting so mad at Tony Stark that you turn into a supervillain is so easy that it seems to happen every other day in the MCU. Sometimes the bad guys even have a point! Hell, Captain America disagreed with him on whether or not to allow Iron Man to blow up Steve's best friend and that caused Cap to become an enemy of the state. It makes you realize that Rhodey's ability to put up with Tony's bullshit is the most amazing superpower of them all.

So in this What If? scenario, when Iron Man strips Spider-Man of his upgrades and gives him a time out in Spider-Man: Homecoming, Peter really loses it. When he's being driven to the homecoming dance, he tells his date's father about how much of a jackass egomaniac Tony is. In this moment of bitching, Toomes sees Peter as less of a threat and more of an opportunity in the form of a kindred spirit. The two end up working together and Vulture succeeds in stealing all that swank hero stuff from Stark's plane.

At first, it's just Peter turning a blind eye to criminal activity out of spite. Just like the OTHER time that happened, it doesn't work out too well for him. Iron Man is able to figure out that Spider-Man had some kind of involvement in the act and uses the Sokovia Accords as reasoning to bring the hammer down on him. Spider-Man escapes, but Vulture dies in the process. There goes another father figure.

Spider-Man decides to prove himself against Iron Man by taking all the stolen tech that Vulture had accumulated and finding worthy people to wield it in the name of starting up an underground, street-level vigilante group.

THOR: RAGNAROK

What If Nebula Killed Thanos?

In Guardians Vol. 2, Nebula is last seen leaving to go slaughter Thanos. We don’t see her until Infinity War, where it’s shown that she failed. Her failure is what helps Thanos realize that Gamora knows where the Soul Stone is and he goes on his rush to get all the Infinity Stones. Let’s just say that Nebula succeeds and kills her adopted father.

Now look to the mid-credits scene from Thor: Ragnarok. Before Thanos' ship arrived, Thor and Loki had an interesting discussion about whether or not Loki can peacefully coexist with Earth’s inhabitants due to the events of Avengers. This possibility would never be explored due to Infinity War suddenly happening.

read more: 20 Uplifting Marvel What If Stories

But without Thanos? We could actually see Thor as a king who isn’t bogged down by PTSD. We can see a Hulk that isn’t at odds with himself. More importantly, we can see how Loki deals with New Asgard. Especially since he happens to have a Tesseract in his possession.

BLACK PANTHER

What If Killmonger Remained King?

Invading Wakanda and succeeding is nigh impossible. You need to have the Infinity Stones or the Phoenix Force to make it happen or else you're going to end up like the Skrulls that one time -- a pile of bodies sent back to space with the message, "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU INVADE WAKANDA," written in blood. This is one of those stories.

Killmonger is an angry hypocrite with no foresight. His plan to arm the underdogs of the world will do nothing but create chaos and untold casualties. It won't take long for Wakanda to become a major target. Rather than throw every superhero at the nation, Iron Man goes alone because he thinks his tech know-how could counter that of Wakanda's. While this is going on, Captain America chooses to go on a one-man mission to take down Killmonger after hearing that Bucky has been killed.

The good news is that Cap and Iron Man are able to work together and even work through their differences. The bad news is that neither survives. After such a failure, Nick Fury sends in as many heavy hitters as possible (deciding to hold off on calling in Captain Marvel), but the results are the same. Killmonger's regime stands tall, even though Wakanda is relatively worse for wear. He does find himself fascinated with the remains of Vision, especially the glowing gem on his head, and keeps his head as a trophy.

The dust has cleared and Killmonger finds himself the king of a global warzone. His victory is shortlived as Thanos and his Black Order arrive for the Stones. Before ending Killmonger's life, Thanos does give him credit for wiping out half of Earth's population before Thanos even had the chance.

AVENGERS: INFINITY WAR

What If Star-Lord Kept His Anger in Check?

One thing that annoys me is when people cite Peter Quill as the reason why Thanos was able to complete the Infinity Gauntlet. Yes, they were so close to pulling off the Gauntlet, and yes, Star-Lord losing control and punching Thanos in the face screwed that up. I get that.

Here’s the thing: Doctor Strange knew that it would happen and didn’t do anything to prevent it because apparently removing the Gauntlet would have still led to a loss. There was only one possible way things were going to work out and that was everything up to the end of Endgame. Star-Lord’s tantrum made little difference and, it’s possible to say, everyone might have been better off because of it.

What I want to know is why that would have been so bad? How would defeating Thanos in that moment have led to defeat? What kind of possible future did Doctor Strange see?

ANT-MAN AND THE WASP

What If Ant-Man Joined the Secret Avengers?

Rather than submit himself to house arrest, Scott Lang sacrifices seeing his daughter in order to hang out with Captain America, Black Widow, and Falcon for a few years. This leads to a major juggling act because he’s still going to get that weird vision from Janet, but things will be a million times easier to deal with because he doesn’t have to beat the clock with the Jimmy Woo business and he has his Avengers pals watching his back. Ghost is defeated, Janet is rescued, Hank is grumpy, and Hope has lost her respect for Scott for essentially abandoning Cassie.

Anyway, the most important thing here is that the Avengers no longer think Scott is under house arrest and are able to bring him to Wakanda and people can finally be excited to see that Thanos butt thing happen. Do it, Marvel. Do it, you cowards.

CAPTAIN MARVEL

What If Captain Marvel Killed Ronan?

Being a prequel that deals with the Kree, Captain Marvel features a couple of brief scenes that show Ronan the Accuser as one of the antagonists. As we know, decades later, he and Korath will become rogue soldiers out to exact revenge on the Xandarians. That means that in Captain Marvel, Ronan is protected by plot armor. What If features no such thing, so there’s nothing stopping Carol Danvers from simply blowing up Ronan’s ship instead of intimidating him to escape and fight another day.

As time goes on and Thanos needs villains to do his dirty work, he doesn’t have Ronan on hand. What he does have is the Mind Stone and what Captain Marvel has is a history of being susceptible to mind manipulation. Thanos ends up forcing Captain Marvel into being his enforcer and decides that he doesn’t even need Loki to begin with. Instead, Danvers razes Earth and tears through the Avengers. She also annihilates the Guardians of the Galaxy before they can even get started as a team while securing the Power Stone.

In the aftermath, a surviving Peter Quill is found in an intergalactic bar, drinking through his depression. A man appears before him, claiming to be his father, with the suggestion that maybe learning his true power for the sake of getting revenge on Captain Marvel (among...other things) is Peter’s purpose.

AVENGERS: ENDGAME

What Became of Thanos 2014’s Timeline?

As I already mentioned, Endgame is the only possible version of the movie’s events where the good guys win. Any and all tangents end with Thanos’ victory. So let’s move away from that.

Endgame’s time heist created two major alternate timelines. One is the alternate version of Avengers, where Loki escapes with the Tesseract and Hydra thinks Cap is on their side. We’ll be getting a whole Disney+ series on that reality.

The other is what’s left behind from the second Thanos. There’s a universe where Gamora, Thanos, and all of Thanos’ underlings and soldiers (minus Ronan) simply ceased to be. They all went to another timeline and never came back. Does that mean that Ego conquers reality? Does the Collector go forward with his plan to acquire all six Infinity Stones?

And what of Earth? This could go in different directions, considering a deleted concept from Endgame was that Thanos 2014 decided to tear apart his timeline’s Avengers before making the time jump. There’s a lot of potential in that episode.

SPIDER-MAN: FAR FROM HOME

What If Mysterio Was Iron Man’s Protégé?

So Quentin Beck created this world-changing hologram technology, watched his boss use it for the sake of personal therapy, make fun of it, and then call Beck out of line? Hey, Beck really shouldn’t have used the lives of a bunch of innocents to prop up his plan, but he had every right to be pissed at Tony Stark.

If television and movies have taught me anything, it’s that if you angrily insult your boss to his face, you have a 50/50 chance of either getting fired or getting a promotion. We saw the firing timeline, so let’s see what happens when Stark decides to actually listen to Beck. I imagine Beck would solidify his belief in the Sokovia Accords and take Spider-Man’s spot in Civil War. Just think about how anti-climactic that airport battle would be when Iron Man’s side ends up being a bunch of holograms and Bucky gets yoinked away in the confusion.

Beck could conceivably figure out Zemo’s plot through his tactics, but the question is how he would follow up on that. Does he step in Zemo’s way or does he agree and allow the Avengers to implode?

Gavin Jasper writes for Den of Geek and would love to see DC do an animated or live-action version of Elseworlds: Speeding Bullets. Read more of his articles here and follow him on Twitter @Gavin4L

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Gavin Jasper

Aug 22, 2019

What If

Disney+

Marvel Cinematic Universe

from Books https://ift.tt/2My7r22

#aion-rsa #Books

[amandajoyce118]

Venom Easter Eggs And References

I realize the movie has been out for a couple of weeks and everyone is more interested in Daredevil right now, but I finally got the chance to type out my Easter eggs. It’s likely I didn’t catch them all, but here’s everything I’ve got.

Note: There are, obviously, spoilers for the movie. You’ve been warned if you haven’t yet seen Venom. If you’re holding off because critics say it sucks, I’ll tell you it’s exactly what I expected out of a Venom movie, and definitely not nearly the worst comic book movie I’ve seen.

Now, on to the Easter eggs.

The Life Foundation

In the comics, the group isn’t really a scientific think tank. Instead, they were a group of survivalists. They believed the Cold War was going to end the planet. They used Venom’s spawn to create five new symbiotes. We get a twist on that in the movie as they discover the symbiotes instead.

The Jameson Connection

One of the astronauts on the Life Foundation’s rocket, in fact, the only one left alive, is designated Jameson. That would be John Jameson, son of J. Jonah Jameson, Daily Bugle editor, meaning at least we know he exists in the Venom universe, even if he hasn’t appeared in any Marvel stuff lately.

It’s also a nice nod to the 90s Spider-Man cartoon where it was John who brought Venom to Earth during a space mission.

San Francisco

Setting the movie in San Francisco, away from all the usual Spider-Man action in New York, allows Sony to push back deciding if Venom and Spidey exist in the same universe or not. They’ve called it MCU-adjacent, so probably not.

San Francisco is also where Eddie Brock spent a lot of time in the comics after losing his job in New York. He spent two years there, and he actually spent a lot of time protecting the homeless, which gets a nod here as well.

Eddie’s Boss

Jack? Surprisingly, not credited in the credits at the end of the movie. Not sure why. But that’s Ron Cephas Jones. You might recognize him as Bobby Fish from Luke Cage.

Carlton Drake

In the comics, he did lead the Life Foundation for a while. He’s also the one who knew he could “extract seeds” from Venom to create more symbiotes. Just how he because so good at figuring out symbiotes in the comics isn’t clear, so it’s nice that he becomes a host for Riot in the movie.

Daily Globe

Yes, this paper exists in the comics. It’s a rival to the Bugle.

Eddie did lose his job at a paper with a bad call. He had someone confess to being a serial killer, and published an article about the guy. Turned out it was a false confession and Spider-Man caught the real killer. Eddie was run out of town. Something similar must have happened for him to lose his job here.

Barney Bushkin

When Eddie’s looking for work, this is the name of one of the people he texts. Barney also happens to be the editor of the Daily Globe. He always wants to one-up J. Jonah Jameson.

Annie Weying

Not Eddie’s almost wife in the comics, but his ex-wife. She is the host of Venom a couple of times in the comics, usually to help Eddie. She’s so overcome with guilt at what the symbiote makes her do though that she and Eddie can never really reconnect. She actually commits suicide eventually. Doesn’t look like that’s something we’ll see from her in the movie if a sequel moves forward since she actually seems to understand Venom pretty well. And yes, her transformation into Venom is straight out of the comic book illustration of She-Venom.

Eddie’s Weights

All those weights all over the floor of Eddie’s apartment have comic book precedent too. Eddie actually was incredible strong before he bonded with Venom, able to lift a few hundred pounds. He keeps up his workout routine even with Venom because he’s always preparing to take on Spider-Man, just in case.

The Schueller Building

Eddie’s apartment building is named after a longtime comic book fan by the name of Randy Schueller. The fan can actually be credited with the first inkling of Venom’s existence. It was he who sent in a letter recommending a black suit for Spider-Man decades ago. Marvel paid him $220 for the idea because they liked the black suit. That idea evolved to be Spider-Man finding a black suit in space that turned out to be a symbiotic alien creature. It’s evolved since then. Schueller gets a little credit with a building named for him.

Michelinie and McFarlane

The law firm that Annie works for is also named for people behind Venom’s origin story. Michelinie and MacFarlane are the comic creators credited with bringing Venom to the page as we know him today.

The Cancer Connection

Drake mentions wanting to use the symbiotes to cure cancer. In the Ultimate Universe of the comics, the symbiotes were actually created as suits to help control the progression of cancer. In the regular 616 continuity, Eddie had adrenal cancer when he bonded with Venom.

Roland Treece

Drake’s head of security was also in the comics, though not in the same role. He was on the board of directors for the Life Foundation. He also ended up in jail every time he went up against Venom. The two versions don’t really have much in common other than their names.

“Eyes, lungs, pancreas… so many snacks, so little time.”

Creepy line of dialogue, yes. But it was actually said by Venom to Spider-Man in the comics first.

A Dog Named Gemini

Okay, a lot of people picked up on the fact that Venom using a dog as an escape route had been one in the comics. To be fair, Venom can bond with just about anything. He’s bonded with a dinosaur and a car, amongst other things. What’s cute about this is that the dog’s name is Gemini. As in “the twins” in astrology, as in two personalities. And then it gets a symbiote? Nice foreshadowing.

Riot

The leader of the symbiotes is one of Venom’s offspring in the comics, and not any kind of invasion leader. Most of the abilities he exhibits actually belong to the other symbiotes in the comics, but it was probably less expensive to have one massive fight instead of several, so that’s forgivable.

One of the standout moments in his fight with Venom at the climax of the movie though? He forces Venom and Eddie to momentarily separate. That was actually a comic book cover once upon a time, only it was Carnage in the fight, not Riot.

Donna Diego

Okay, so I have to mention that one of Riot’s hosts is a woman who later eats a live eel to try and control his hunger. This is while Riot is bouncing from host to host to find its way to the Life Foundation. While she’s not named during the movie, she’s named as Donna Diego in the credits. In the comics, Donna Diego was actually a member of the Life Foundation and she becomes the one who bonds with the Scream symbiote. We see the colors for Scream (red and yellow) in the containment chambers, but never see Scream in action.

Stan Lee Cameo

He appears to give Eddie a little advice, but not just Eddie as he remarks “both of you,” indicating he knows about Venom as well. This is likely a nod to Lee appearing with the Watchers in the MCU, a note that he sees all. Does this mean Venom is in the MCU? No. Because the Watchers can see into other timelines and universes.

“I’m a loser too.”

Venom’s line of dialogue makes reference to more modern comic book stories that reveal he wasn’t a model Klyntar. Instead, he’s been paired with unstable hosts that have corrupted him. In fact, one of his first did just that, making him an outcast of his people.

Chocolate

When Venom tells Eddie he wants tater tots and chocolate, that’s no coincidence. Depending on the story, Venom’s species survives on different chemicals. One of those is adrenaline, which is why Eddie having adrenal cancer in the comics benefits Venom as he feeds on the overproduced adrenaline. The other is phenethylamine, which is found in not just the human brain, but also chocolate, making it a favorite snack of the symbiotes.

Ron Lim

The trend of naming things after people connected to Venom continues. One of the shops Eddie walks by, and herbalist, is named for Ron Lim. Lim was a major artist for Venom for several years.

Carnage

The mid credit scene features Eddie visiting a very dangerous man in jail. He makes the quip that when he gets out, there’ll be “carnage.” Obviously, this man is Cletus Kasady, who goes on to bond with the symbiote Carnage. What’s unclear here is how much his origin has been changed. Is he already Carnage and buying his time? Or will the comic book origin of Venom leaving a spore behind in the jail cell that bonds with him come to be? Who knows?

Into The Spiderverse

Sony likes to advertise for their other projects, which is exactly what they did post-credits with an extended sneak peek at Into The Spiderverse. Interestingly, they note that it’s “in another universe.” That’s sure to make fans wonder even more if Spider-Man even exists in Venom or not.

#venom #venom spoilers #venom easter eggs #marvel comics #marvel easter eggs

[racefortheironthrone]

Thoughts on Spiderman: Homecoming

I’ll put my short, non-spoiler version above the cut for people who haven’t seen it yet: it’s good. It’s really good, head and shoulders above the Amazing duology and it holds its own against the Raimi films more than you would think. 

Specifically, it has two major strengths: first, as many people have noted, Tom Holland’s Spiderman feels like a real teenager way more than either Andrew Garfield or Tobey Macguire did - in part because the movie makes the most of out its science high school setting by giving Holland a secondary cast of other teens to bounce off of, and by making the conflict between his superhero life and his regular life being about high school things generally (making Lego Death Stars, Academic Decathalon meets, detention) instead of just about his romantic relationships. 

Second, as other people have noted, Spiderman: Homecoming feels way more New York  (more of a neighborhood Spiderman, you could say) than previous Spiderman movies. The Amazing movies’ idea of New York was some abstracted Times Square theme park, and with the best will in the world, even the Raimi films portrayed an extremely white New York that didn’t go beyond Midtown canyons and various landmarks. But Homecoming felt like Queens, from the multicultural student body at Midtown Science to Spiderman and the Prowler (you were great, Donald Glover!) arguing over which bodegas have the best sandwiches, to the jokes about how the outer boroughs aren’t well-stocked with tall buildings to web-swing off of, to Spiderman’s interactions with neighborhood locals who get pissed when would-be superheroes web their hands to their cars or repay subway directions with churros. 

Protagonist

So let’s start with Tom Holland. For all that people complain about the Marvel “machine,” one of the things the machine does very well is make sure that their writers and directors nail the main characters, even if that’s at the expense of the plot, because you have to sell the audience on the character to get the audience to care, and because superhero plots are generally pretty secondary anyway. And Homecoming does a really good job of building on the excellent work that Civil War did. To quote myself:

“I buy Tom Holland more than I ever bought Andrew Garfield or Tobey Maguire - Tobey was always a bit too soft and saccharine for me to buy that he was the irreverent snarker behind the mask, whereas Andrew’s performance was way too much of an over-reaction to the backlash against Spiderman III, and came off as way too cool.

That’s the thing about Spiderman/Peter Parker that makes him tricky: he’s a nerd and a bit nebbishy (although he kind of ages out of that a little - there had to be something there that Mary Jane Watson liked), but once he puts the mask on, he gains the confidence to express himself, even if that is as a smart-alecky motor-mouth. There’s a side of Peter Parker that has an ego, a yearning to show the world that he’s not Puny Parker any more - after all, the first thing he did when he got super-powers was to get in front of TV cameras - that makes him prank J. Jonah Jameson to get back at him, or not just fight the Kingpin but relentlessly crack fat jokes at him.

As I’ve said above, it’s really easy to grab one part of that personality and not the other. And one of the things I really like about Tom Holland’s Spiderman is that I feel like you have both...”

So how did Homecoming build on this? First, the nerd side of Peter Parker was nicely contextualized by his high school (which because it’s an elite magnet school is full of nerds) - he’s extremely high-scoring (he’s bullied by Flash because Peter’s constantly showing him up in class, and he’s the lynchpin of the Decathalon team until MJ steps up in his absence) but you get the sense that he feels like he’s maybe too smart for school so he sometimes gets himself in detention and probably hurts his GPA a bit by not doing homework in favor of his own projects; he’s a joiner (Decathalon, band, etc.) because he’s not very socially confident (hence his small friend circle of Ned and MJ, hence his mini-freakouts about Liz’s party and the eponymous dance) BUT he’s also someone who over-extends himself and then quits (holy crap did that one hit close to home), so he’s seen as a bit of a flake. 

Second, that nerd side nicely parallels his super-hero side, with the wonderful euphemism of the “Stark internship” (god, no wonder Flash is jealous). Peter is desperate for recognition, to get called up to the big leagues, to the point where he’s constantly biting off more than he can chew (literally taking the training wheels off too early) to prove himself to “Mr. Stark” and then tries desperately to hold everything together or explain his screwups away when it blows up in his face. (Notably, all of the major action setpieces in the movie except the last one involve situations where Peter’s over-enthusiasm has actually created a bigger problem: foiling the bank robbery causes the bodega fire, his investigation of the alien power source causes the damage to the Washington Monument, his web-slinging damages the fission gun that damages the ferry, etc.) At the same time, he’s trying to live up to the image of what he thinks a super-hero ought to be, whether that’s in posing for commuters and doing backflips for hot dog vendors or making quips at bad guys (notably, his smart-alecking always comes off as a mixture of nervous posing and too much energy rather than coming off as mean). 

But most importantly, at root Spiderman is a genuinely selfless hero - his first thought is to save the bodega owner and the bodega cat, he gives the ferry rescue everything he’s got even if he comes up short as 98% sucessful, he tells criminals to shoot at him rather than at anyone else, and in the film’s master-stroke, he goes all-out to save Adrian Toombs who’s repeatedly tried to kill him the moment he realizes that his wing-suit has gone unstable, because Spiderman doesn’t want to “instant death” anyone. And he’s utterly determined, as we see in the whole third act where he goes right after Toombs despite getting his ass kicked by the Shocker, then pulls himself out from the rubble Toombs buried him under, then gets himself onto the Quinjet then saves Coney Island from the crashing Quinjet, and on and on....

Antagonist

So...Michael Keaton. While not given a ton of time, Keaton does a great job reframing Adrian Toombs as the voice of blue collar upper-middle-class resentment, justifying theft and murder with his hatred of Tony Stark and the 1% on the one hand and the need to provide for his family on the other, and selling you on how this guy gives more and more reign to his dark side while trying to hang on to his hypocritical moral code. Also, it was an inspired idea to build on the idea of the Vulture being a scavenger by making him both a salvage operator and someone who later makes his money by stealing the aftermath of the Avengers’ battles and turns them into weapons. (BTW, even though the wings were re-done as military high-tech, they still had some personality - the way they draped down feather-like when he was resting on the billboard, the way he used them to pick up Peter and maybe use them as blades.)

Critically, the movie didn’t kill him off. See, Marvel’s villain problem isn’t always about how generic they are (although that was a problem for Malekith and Ronan the Accuser) but that they constantly kill off their villains which means that there’s no opportunity to build up a relationship between hero and villain - Robert Redford’s HYDRA true believer or Ultron would be great recurring villains, except they’re dead now. If Keaton ever wants to reprise his role, it would only take a jailbreak to put him back in the mix gunning for revenge according to his own code. 

Also, the movie did a good job seeding future villains. We see the mantle (or rather the gage) of the Shocker get passed on in the film, the Tinkerer seems to get away in the end so is on hand for future movies, we get a great setup for why the Scorpion would go after Spiderman, and we even meet the Prowler who’d make for a great frenemy villain. 

Secondary Cast

The kids are more than all right, they’re damn fantastic. Ned was a great audience stand-in as well as a voice of reason, was great as “the chair,” and even got to use the webshooters, Liz Allen nicely avoided a lot of “superhero girlfriend” pitfalls, Flash was a nice alternative to the over-used jock archetype, and Zendaya was a genuinely oddball presence who makes for a very different MJ than we’ve ever seen before (my friend @elanabrooklyn thinks that she’s basically comics Jessica Jones in all but name, which I would be ok with). 

Marissa Tomei as Aunt May could have used more screen-time, but what there was, was great, from the ongoing gag that she’s completely oblivious to the fact that pretty much all the men in the service sector she meets are in lorb with her, to her very real mix of showing concern and trying to encourage while giving a teenager room, to her final F-bomb - which thankfully cut short the “Aunt May can’t know” storyline. 

RDJ as Tony Stark actually didn’t over-shadow the film as much as people had worried - mostly, he’s there being simultaneously neglectful (answering some text messages, providing some encouragement outside of post-crisis situations, and actually explaining why you’re doing what you’re doing would be a good idea, Tony) and over-bearing (tracking devices and surveillance cameras are not a substitute for communicating, Tony), which is sort of how you’d expect him to handle being a mentor/surrogate father on his first go-round.

Plot

Despite how confident people were about what was going to happen in the movie from the trailers, the film actually did a great job throwing the unexpected at you, whether it’s the suburban lawn-chase sequence that wasn’t in the trailers, or the FBI showing up on the ferry, or the fact that Peter and Ned were directly responsible for the Washington Monument crisis, or why the Vulture and Spiderman were on a plane. 

More importantly, the high school plot really really worked and intersected nicely with the superhero plot - Peter’s indecision about using his Spiderman persona to boost his and Ned’s social standing leading into the suburban lawn-chase, the Academic Decathalon giving the Washington Monument rescue real stakes, and best of all, the moment where Adrian Toombs opens the door for his daughter’s date and the commonplace dad/boyfriend tension goes into overdrive.  

#marvel #marvel meta #spiderman #spiderman homecoming

[fandoms-funnies-etc]

The World Knows (Post FFH)

SPOILERS Taking place right where Far From Home left off, Peter has to deal with the immediate consequences of his identity being exposed by none other than Mysterio and J Jonah Jameson. Luckily Happy is there to help him through it and the decision he must make. 

(2378 Words)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19738093

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13332813/1/The-World-Knows-Post-Far-From-Home

All the eyes in New York City turn towards Spider-Man. The words of J. Jonah Jameson still echoing through the streets, across just about every internet connected device in the city. 

Spider-Man turns slowly from the 10-story-tall screen that had just shown Mysterio’s video from London, exposing his identity. His gaze locks with MJ, her mouth hanging slightly agape as a crowd starts to fill in around her, pushing past her to get closer to him up on the lamppost. MJ mouths, ‘Go, get out of here’, as she also starts to back up out of the scene.

Frozen, Peter takes a few moments to make his limbs move. His mind is clouded, running the clips he had just seen over and over again in his head. 

The shouts from the people below break through his daze: “Is it true?” “Will you be using these ‘attack drones’ more?” “Why did you kill Mysterio?” “Is your name really ‘Peter Parker’?”

He wavers on top of the light post, trying to block out their questions. He stammers, “Uh, uh, gotta, gotta stop that crime, over there...” before finally swinging away.

He stops short of his apartment building when he catches a glimpse of the crowd of people and reporters already surrounding the building. He quickly takes out his phone and dials May. It barely rings once before she picks up, “Peter! Peter are you okay?” she asks frantically.

“I was just calling to ask you the same thing.” He replies, taking off his mask and keeping in the shadows of the rooftop across the street. 

She sighs in slight relief, “I’m fine, don’t worry about me. Happy and his security team are keeping the trespassers out.”

Peter closes his eyes, exhaling, the reality of the situation crashing down on him, “May, I’m so-”

“Don't you apologize! This isn't your fault. We’ll figure something out. For all that the public knows, Beck could have been lying about Spider-Man’s identity. Nothing has been confirmed, or denied to the public by you, which is the only voice that matters now.” She says in a level-headed tone, attempting to keep Peter’s and her own fears at bay. 

“I-I’m sorry,” Peter mutters anyway into the phone, his eyes still closed, hoping that when he opened them the whole situation would just stop. 

May pauses, “This isn't your fault, Peter” she reiterates, trying to soothe him through the phone. “H-Happy just wants you to lay low for a bit while he gets the media under control.” She relays, faltering, her worry creeping into her voice.  

He clears his throat, “W-where should I, where can I go? My face is all over the city, oh, no, what about Ned and MJ?” He realizes, “They’ll be connected to me like you, I’ve gotta-”

“Happy already has teams looking after them,” she assures him, “he also said you can hide out in the old Avengers tower. Nothing’s moved in on the top floor yet, and no one can get in there either.” She explains, and Peter can tell that she’s pacing, “Just try and make sure no one sees you.”

He nods, “I’ll try.” He peeks out and sees the familiar abandoned building along the skyline. “I love you, May. Have Happy call me when anything has changed.”

“Be safe, Peter, please,” she softly begs.

“You too.” He hangs up and puts his mask back on, shooting a text to the group chat with MJ and Ned: ‘are you guys ok?’, before slowly and carefully making his way towards the Avengers Tower. 

His suit scans the area around him, pinpointing the best time and place for him to swing to keep out of sight. 

He makes the final climb up and over the railing of the balcony. He looks for a way inside, crawling up to one of the glass doors and pulling, “Stark tech confirmed. Welcome.” Friday’s voice chimes, followed by the sound of the lock releasing. 

“Guess they didn't remove everything on moving day.” He whispers as he enters the lounge. The door locks behind him and the glass wall tints automatically. Peter’s shoulders relax a bit. He removes his mask and looks at his phone which has grown warm from the influx of notifications suddenly bombarding his social media, texts, and voicemails from people he’s never met. He wades through the noise to get back to his group chat:

MJ: ‘besides the small crowd of reporters that followed me home, i’m great’

Ned: ‘ur asking if we’re ok?? are you ok??? Taht jerkwad Mysterio blew your identity to the world!’

MJ: ‘where are u, peter? I’m watching the news for any word about u and they havent seen u’

Peter texts back, leaning up against the glass, looking out over the city:

Peter: ‘Happy told may to tell me to hideout till he gets a handle on things. I’m at avengers tower’

Ned: ‘woah that’s cool at least, what’s it like up there?’

Peter: ‘it’s mostly empty. Some of the tech is still integrated into the building tho, it let me in. happy said he sent people to protect you guys, are they there?’

MJ: ‘yeah, a couple large white dudes escorted me home and i think are still outside my door’

Ned: ‘same.’

Peter holds his phone down, sighing with relief, replying:

Peter: ‘i'm so sorry this is happening guys,’

Ned: ‘Don't worry about us, bro, but like are you gonna like confirm or deny what mysterio and that jameson guy said?’

Peter: ‘what do you mean?’

Ned: ‘i mean i'm sure we can figure out the whole peter parker and spiderman seen in the same place at the same time together/ cover up if we need to, it’s one of my favorite tropes’

MJ: ‘he’s got a point, can't be that hard to pull off’

He considers this for a second, watching the sun begin to set behind the skyline. 

Peter: ‘you think that kind of thing works in real life?’

MJ: ‘well i guess people know spiderman has stark tech which can manipulate the public to seeing what ever you want, so who knows’

Ned: ‘yeah might want to keep that on the DL’

His phone starts to vibrate as Happy’s face takes up the screen with an incoming call. Peter accepts the call and puts him on speaker, “Happy, tell me some good news, please.” 

Distant shouts of reporters call out from Happy’s side of the call, fading into the background before he speaks, “Well, we’ve got solid perimeters sets up around May and your friends. We also got our data-blocker finally up on everyone as well, basically hiding your personal accounts from the public for now.” He states, “Did you get in the Tower fine?”

Peter nods, “Yeah, yeah, super easy”

“Good, good. So, our next move is going to be based off you, kid.” Happy informs followed by the sound of a door closing, the crowd noises fully dissipated. 

Peter rocks on his heels, “What do you mean?”

“I mean, we can squash this. We can get our cleanup and recovery teams clearing your name as soon as you give the word. No guarantees your life will be exactly the same, but we can get pretty close.” He overviews, “Or, we set up an official press conference, a controlled setting, where ‘Peter Parker’ can introduce himself as Spider-Man to the world.”

Peter absorbs this carefully, “And, uh, when do you need this decision by?”

“Well I don't want to rush you but sooner would be better than later.” He confides. 

“Cool,cool,cool,cool,cool, so, uh, wow, so should I make a pro/con list or what should I do?” Peter starts pacing around the room, dim lights flicker on as the sun gets lower.

Happy hesitates, “I-I can't really make this decision for you, Pete. Do you have any gut-reaction either way?”

“Honestly, my gut-reaction is to be unsure about everything.” He flusters, cracking his knuckles nervously before a sudden calm rushes over him, “How was... Mr. Stark sure when he wanted to tell everyone he was Iron Man?” He asks quietly, putting his phone down on the bar, leaning forward over it.

Peter remembered that day, well, just barely. He was only a few years old when May turned on the news with that press conference as the biggest story of the night, probably of the year. Over the years he had rewatched Tony’s reveal several times on YouTube, just mesmerized by how confident and cool Tony Stark was, and loved the press’s sudden reaction to his words: “I am Iron Man”.

He can tell Happy is collecting his thoughts before answering, “I-I honestly don't know. I could never predict what Tony had going through his head at any given moment.” He chuckles to himself quietly, “I think he just had a feeling that it was something he needed to do in the moment. He didn't have to think about the consequences, because he knew that whatever came his way, he could handle it.”

Peter nods, “Well, of course, he’s Tony Stark.”

“But the consequences were that it strained his relationships, it delayed him starting a family because he feared putting more people that he loved in danger,” Happy adds sincerely, “But it also allowed Tony to live truthfully with the public, which he needed when he realized where his old weapons were ending up. Despite what it seemed like, he wanted to be held accountable for his actions as Tony and as Iron Man.” 

“So, he never regretted letting people know his identity?” Peter stops pacing, looking at his mask in his hand.

“I’m sure he had regrets once and a while; like everyone else, Tony had doubts, even though he didn't like to show it.” Happy says knowingly.

Peter presses his lips together, putting his mask down on the bar next to his phone. “So what does that mean for me?”

“I don't know. What does it mean for you?” Happy prods gently, not trying to sway him either way, but to make his own decision.

Peter stares into the eyes of his mask, his reflection looking back at him through the lenses. “I think... I think, Mr. Stark said, he wanted me ‘to be better’. And I think that means, deciding what’s best for me, and not just following his example.” He inhales slowly through his nose, “I’m not ready. I’m not ready for the world to know my identity. Not yet. My relationship with MJ is still new, and when Beck targeted my friends in London, that... t-that was the scariest moment of my life. I’m so lucky that you were there to help protect them, but what if in the future you’re not.” His voice breaks a bit, “It would fall on me. The less people who can connect my friends and family to Spider-Man, the better right now. I want to be a ‘normal kid’ a bit longer, if that’s okay.” 

“That’s perfectly fine, Pete. I’ll get my crew on it right now.” Happy turns from the phone, saying a code into another device that Peter can’t make out. He returns to their call, “They’re clearing your name as we speak.”

“Thank you.” He sighs with relief, finally feeling his muscles fully relax.

“And Peter,” Happy cuts back in, “this doesn't make you any less of a hero, by the way. Admitting your limits is one of the hardest things heroes have to do. Trust me, I know a lot of super people.” 

Peter smiles, “Thanks, Happy.”

“Any day, kid. So just stay low for a bit longer until I give the all-clear and you can come home.” 

~

By the next morning, anonymously sent in footage someone took of Spider-Man chasing after bank robbers that clearly showed ‘Peter Parker’ watching from the sidelines as Spider-Man swung overhead, was playing on every news network and social media page. Other anonymous tips came in from ‘experts’ explaining how the footage sent in by Mysterio was doctored, a prank against Peter Parker by one of his classmates that got out of hand. 

Even J. Jonah Jameson dropped the story on ‘Peter Parker’, but still held onto the rhetoric that Spider-Man was a menace to the city, and not without faults. 

But the worst was over for Peter. He accepted the teases from Flash who taunted how anyone could ever believe that ‘Penis Parker’ is Spider-Man, the only time he’s ever been grateful for Flash’s relentless bullying. 

“Told you you could pull the old ‘can't be in two places at once’ bit in real life.” Ned nudges Peter as they and MJ settle down on the couch in Peter’s living room. 

“Yeah, gratefully people aren’t very critical of what the media tells them is real.” MJ says sarcastically before Peter and Ned give her a look, “I mean I’m actually grateful for people’s ignorance this once.” She amends. 

“Same.” Ned and Peter say in unison. 

MJ leans forward in her seat, “If you’re ever thinking about telling anyone else your identity, run them by me, I’ll be able to tell if we can trust them or not.” She points her finger at Peter, punctuating her words. “We’re gonna keep your secret on lock-down”.

“Totally.” Ned agrees, “If they want Spider-Man, they’ll have to go through us!” Ned pounds his fist into the palm of his other hand. “I should also make an official set up so I’m ready to be your guy-in-the-chair whenever you need me.”

Peter leans back and smiles to himself, “I don’t know what I’d do without you guys.” 

Ned sticks his hand out between the three of them, “Team friends-with-spiderman” he declares.

MJ puts her hand on top of his, “Friends-with-spiderman”, she smirks at Peter.

Peter hesitates, “Do I put my hand in? Because technically-”

“Just put your hand in,” MJ shoves him playfully with her shoulder.

He chuckles, “Team friends-with-spiderman” he states, adding his hand to the top.

“Team friends-with-spiderman!” May pops in from the next room and rushes over to add her hand on top of Peters, pushing down and then throwing her hand in the air excitedly.

The three kids burst out laughing but follow suit, exploding their hands from the center and into the air beside May. 

#ffh spoilers #spiderman #spider man #spider-man #spoilers #far from home #far from home spoilers

[njawaidofficial]

'Spider-Man: Homecoming' Easter Eggs and Comic Book Story References

http://styleveryday.com/2017/07/10/spider-man-homecoming-easter-eggs-and-comic-book-story-references/

'Spider-Man: Homecoming' Easter Eggs and Comic Book Story References

[Warning: This story contains spoilers for Spider-Man: Homecoming]

If there is one thing to be said about Marvel Studios and Sony’s new Spider-Man: Homecoming, it is that it is a fresh new take on the character, overflowing with new ideas, set pieces and interesting characters. For more than a decade, Marvel Studios has had to sit on the sidelines while Sony produced Spider-Man film after Spider-Man film, while the company continued to release its Spider-Man comics. Now, the two finally meet.

With their first opportunity to exercise creative control over the character, it should come as no surprise that they pumped the film full of references, callbacks and Easter eggs for fans, new and old, to enjoy. The result is a sort of Spider-Man film via remix, with various elements from all of Spider-Man’s history mixed together in a way that fans have never seen before.

Compiled below is a list of these references (heavy SPOILERS). How many do you recognize? And let us know what we missed by tweeting @HeatVisionBlog (bonus points for sharing a comic book panel and issue number).

Amazing Spider-Man No. 2

The Comics: Phineas Mason was one of Spider-Man’s earliest villains, an engineering genius that went by the name The Terrible Tinkerer. Mason could invent powerful weapons and gadgets from just about anything and outfitted a large number of Spidey’s villains. Strangely enough, he was initially revealed to be an alien in disguise, as Stan Lee slowly figured out what kind of villains would work for Spider-Man. A later writer would reveal that he was actually a human pretending to be an alien. Comics are weird.

The Movie: Mason (Michael Chernus) is Adrian Toomes’ (Michael Keaton) right-hand man, building all the tech he uses as The Vulture. He’s constantly encouraging Toomes to continue escalating his scores through the use of more sophisticated technology.

Ultimate Spider-Man No. 153

The Comics: In the alternate Ultimate universe, a younger Peter Parker was always told he would be forced to join S.H.I.E.L.D.’s Ultimate team (its version of the Avengers) when he turned 18 years old. After a number of instances where Spider-Man and his villains were involved in either saving or nearly ending the world, both Tony Stark and Captain America were tasked with training Peter as Spider-Man.

The Movie: Tony (Robert Downey Jr.) has taken Peter under his wing, both keeping him at a distance and constantly watching him to be sure he doesn’t step out of line or cause too much trouble. It’s a reluctant mentorship, just like in the comics.

Ultimate Spider-Man No. 155

The Comics: On Ultimate Peter Parker’s birthday (after their training), Tony Stark has Mary Jane pass a gift on to Peter. This gift is a pair of powered-up webshooters capable of firing all kinds of different webbing.

The Movie: Tony doesn’t stop at redesigning Peter’s webshooters but builds him a customized suit, with a very similar pair of new webshooters to the ones in the comics. The whole thing is wrapped up as a gift in a shiny suitcase.

Ultimate Comics Spider-Man (Vol. 2) No.2

The Comics: After Miles Morales replaced Peter Parker as Spider-Man in the Ultimate universe, readers were introduced to a new cast of characters, more specifically they were introduced to Ganke Lee. Ganke is Miles’ right-hand man or “guy in the chair” if you will. He loves Legos, is a bit too loose with Miles’ secret, and can’t resist nerding out that he knows a superhero. Meanwhile, Ned Leeds was a pretty bland character, introduced in the regular universe, who mainly operated as competition for Peter in regards to his love life and photography career. He was eventually falsely outted as the Hobgoblin and subsequently murdered.

The Movie: For some reason, Spider-Man: Homecoming makes Ganke Lee into Peter’s new best friend, giving him the name Ned Leeds (Jacob Batalon) for no real apparent reason. Who can say why they felt the need to change the names while maintaining everything that makes Ganke special, I’m just glad he’s in the film … because he’s awesome.

Amazing Spider-Man Annual No. 3

The Comics: In the earliest days of Spider-Man, comics writer Stan Lee was still trying to figure out what was going to make Spider-Man special as a character. Before seizing on the emotional core of “With Great Power Must Also Come Great Responsibility” line, Lee emphasized Spider-Man’s teenage loner status. This saw him breaking into the Fantastic Four’s headquarters and fighting the team all in a vain attempt to join them and make a solid paycheck. The same was true with the Avengers. When they reach out to him to potentially join the team, he ends up fighting them, further solidifying his reputation as an untrustworthy loner.

The Movie: The same is essentially true here, Spider-Man’s introduction to the Avengers in “Captain America: Civil War” couldn’t have gone worse for his reputation, to the point that even Iron Man doesn’t really trust him to be responsible. He’s a liability, not an asset, and is basically being held back from joining the team because of it.

Untold Tales of Spider-Man No. 2

The Comics: Jason Ionello (Jorge Lendeborg Jr.) is a part of Flash Thompson’s gang of “popular” kids who constantly bully Peter Parker. Yet, in an ironic twist of fate, he’s also one of the leaders of the Spider-Man Fan Club.

The Movie: Jason appears on a television screen in Midtown High School as one of the anchors of the school’s hastily produced morning news. He awkwardly tries to ask out his co-anchor, Betty Brant (Angourie Rice), on the air.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 7

The Comics: Betty Brant is one of Peter Parker’s best friends and his first love in high school. She works as J. Jonah Jameson’s secretary and often flirts with Peter when he turns in pictures. Their relationship was cut short when she realized she couldn’t handle Peter’s secret and the violence he seemed to be involved in. So, she ran off into the arms of Ned Leeds, then Flash Thompson, then Peter again, and on and on and on. She’s kind of notorious for having a rather frustrated love life.

The Movie: Betty appears alongside Jason Ionello as the co-anchor of the Midtown High School news program. She’s also one of Liz’s good friends and sees her off at the end of the film before Liz moves to Oregon. I think, in an intentional nod to Gwen Stacy and the remix mentality of this film, she’s wearing Gwen’s signature hair band.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 2

The Comics: The Vulture is one of Spider-Man’s first villains, but is notoriously the first to engage him in spectacular aerial combat. He’s an octogenarian inventor who devises his own anti-gravity harness and robs banks and helicopters around the city. Most notable about him is the green color scheme and vulture-like collar he wears. This would be updated to a more modern suit in the Ultimate Spider-Man comics (see bottom picture).

The Movie: The Vulture’s entire backstory is changed for the movie, but the types of crimes he commits remain largely the same. His color scheme is largely maintained, with most of the green coming through his nightvision goggles. He retains claws like the Ultimate version and even sports a featured collar of sorts with his sporty bomber jacket.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 17

The Comics: In the early Spider-Man comics, there was no power-couple more influential than the popular Flash Thompson and Liz Allan. However, the two take a notably unpopular stance by starting up their own Spider-Man Fan Club – Forest Hills Chapter. Peter learns that Liz is throwing a big party and that they are expecting Spider-Man to show up. Peter loves the dramatic irony that he could show up as Spider-Man and humiliate Flash, but at the same time knows that his lack of presence as Peter will go noticed by a number of people, namely Liz and his girlfriend Betty. Too bad his decision is made for him when the Green Goblin shows up to wreck the party, landing Peter in hot water for ducking out so quickly.

The Movie: Liz throws a party, where Flash (Tony Revolori) is the DJ, and Peter is equally divided on how he’s going to attend. He learns Liz has a crush on Spider-Man and knows he could score points confirming that Peter is buddies with Spidey … except that he’s both Peter and Spider-Man. Too bad his decision is made for him when the Vulture’s goons start toying with their devastating weaponry, landing Peter in hot water for ducking out so quickly.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 46

The Comics: The Shocker is one of Spider-Man’s early villains and eventually became one of his favorites. He wears two gauntlets that vibrate to shoot beams, land devastating punches, and allow him to shake off blows. He’s also constantly mocked for his name and strange outfit, which resembles weird bed/couch lining. In fact, it’s been pretty much confirmed that’s what it is.

The Movie: There are two Shockers in Spider-Man: Homecoming, after one (played by Logan Marshall-Green) meets an untimely end. Their weaponry is essentially identical to that of the comics, although he has only one outfit. Even better, Adrian Toomes makes fun of him for his name and dorky costume. (The second Shocker is played by Bokeem Woodbine.) 

Amazing Spider-Man No. 267

The Comics: In “The Commuter Cometh,” one of the funniest Spider-Man stories of all time, Peter chases a burglar into the suburbs of New York City and quickly learns how ineffective his powers are without the urban towers of the city. One of the best moments is when he fires a web into the sky only to realize that there aren’t any buildings to latch on to.

The Movie: The same exact thing happens. Except this time my jaw hit the floor at the obscurity of the reference finding a way onto the silver screen.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 63

The Comics: Adrian Toomes can’t stand people who double-cross him. This is especially true of Blackie Drago, a fellow inmate who learns about the Vulture suit and subsequently steals it and claims the role for himself. Toomes eventually turns the tables on Blackie and reclaims the mantle of Vulture.

The Movie: This isn’t really a reference to the comics, but I couldn’t help but think of this moment when Adrian Toomes murders the original Shocker, for threatening to betray him, and passes the mantle of Shocker on to his partner (“Now you’re the Shocker”). I returned to this moment of the comics in the mid-credits sequence where Mac Gargan (Michael Mando) asks Adrian about Spider-Man’s identity. Who is to say that Mac won’t do the exact same thing as Blackie in future Spider-Man movies?

Amazing Spider-Man No. 11

The Comics: Spider-Man invents a mechanized spider-tracer that sends him signals via his spider-sense and allows him to track his enemies if they come in close contact with him. Typically, Spider-Man would fling the tracer at his enemies, trying to attach it to their clothing without them noticing.

The Movie: Peter does the same thing in the movie, just with a far more advanced system, and a robotic spider that can crawl on its own. He uses this to track down the Vulture gang to Maryland.

Amazing Spider-Man: Renew Your Vows (Vol. 2) No. 1

The Comics: Peter Parker has been operating a con for almost his entire adult life wherein he takes selfies and sells them to his publisher J. Jonah Jameson as if they were pictures he’s taken of Spider-Man. Taking selfies is difficult when you’re swinging through town and fighting villains, so he builds Buzzbee, his very own spider-drone, to do the dirty work for him.

The Movie: Peter discovers that the spider on his chest is also a drone. This drone has more capabilities than just taking pictures and operates as a fun comic foil for him during several scenes, especially when his Advanced Interrogation Mode is activated.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 231

The Comics: When Spider-Man burst onto the scene in 1962, his costume came complete with web-pits of dubious practical functionality, but clear stylistic functionality. Who doesn’t love web-pits? They would be retired years later, but they resurface every now and then depending on the artist.

The Movie: Peter eventually discovers that his suit has built in web-pits that can be retracted at will. They allow him to essentially wing-suit glide through the sky like some sort of flying squirrel. I’m just thankful that in this iteration he wasn’t bitten by a radioactive flying squirrel … or was he? What are you hiding from us Peter?

Amazing Spider-Man (Vol. 4) No. 1

The Comics: Over the years, Spider-Man has experimented with changing up his webbing a lot. Sometimes he’ll mix cement in it to defeat Hydro-Man or mix it with a rubber substance to beat Electro. Recently, he’s been adding a lot of new tech into his repertoire, specifically taser webbing. The effect is devastating.

The Movie: When Peter and Ned disable Tony Stark’s control over the spider-suit, it allows Peter to activate his AI, Karen (Jennifer Connelly), and turn on Combat Mode. This unlocks hundreds of new weapons for him to utilize, including taser webbing. The comics haven’t played around with Instant Kill Mode, and I’m thankful for it.

Ultimate Comics Spider-Man (Vol. 20) No. 1

The Comics: When the Ultimate version of Peter Parker is murdered stopping the Green Goblin from harming his family, the young Miles Morales takes up the mantle of Spider-Man, inspired by Peter’s sacrifice. Unfortunately, Miles doesn’t have an inspiring uncle like Peter; his uncle is Aaron Davis, a criminal that goes by the name “The Prowler.” It is Aaron’s actions that cause Miles to be bitten by a genetically engineered spider. Aaron cares for his nephew but is eventually accidentally killed during a moment between him and Miles, as he’s trying to teach Miles to use his powers for personal gain instead of heroism.

The Movie: Aaron Davis is portrayed by Donald Glover, who publicly advocated his desire to portray Spider-Man for years. In the movie, Aaron Davis tries to buy weaponry from the Shockers, before escaping when Spider-Man interrupts the deal. Spider-Man later interrogates Aaron, whose criminal records identify him as “The Prowler” and one of his aliases as “Brian Pichelli,” after the names of his comic book creators Brian Michael Bendis and Sara Pichelli. Most notable is that Aaron helps Spider-Man out because of his concern for his “nephew.” This has hugely excited fans of Miles, as it lays the groundwork for his eventual introduction into the MCU.

Ultimate Comics Spider-Man (Vol. 2) No. 6, Amazing Spider-Man No. 20

The Comics: Mac Gargan was a private investigator who was hired by J. Jonah Jameson to follow Peter and figure out how he could take the pictures he took. Jameson then hired Gargan to be subjected to tests that would turn him into the Scorpion. As a result, the Scorpion grew to hate both Spider-Man and Jameson. In the Ultimate universe, there are two different Scorpions, but the important one is an invulnerable gang leader with a giant scorpion tattoo.

The Movie: Mac Gargan is introduced on the Staten Island Ferry as one of Toomes’ gang members, with a noticeable scorpion tattoo. After getting knocked off the ferry and hurt in the subsequent destruction, he’s captured and sent to jail, where he reappears in the mid-credits sequence to proclaim his hatred for Spider-Man.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 10

The Comics: Jackson Brice is one of the founding members of The Enforcers, a hit-squad consisting of a number of gangsters with weirdly specific talents. Montana is notable for his incredible skills with a lasso. He and his team of Enforcers would show up from time to time to make trouble for Spider-Man, mostly on behalf the Kingpin.

The Movie: Remember the guy who was the Shocker, right before he got obliterated by the not-the-gravity-gun? Well, his name was Jackson Brice. So he was the Shocker and Montana … apparently. RIP.

Damage Control (Vol. 2) No. 1

The Comics: Damage Control is a construction company specializing in fixing damage that’s caused by fights between Marvel’s heroes and villains. If you’ve ever wondered why anyone would live in Marvel’s fictional New York City, it’s because these guys do a great job of clean-up.

The Movie: Damage Control is a government agency operating under Tony Stark to help clean up after the events of 2012’s The Avengers. They take the clean-up job away from Adrian Toomes and his company, essentially sparking his working-class rage. They also operate several large containment facilities that house all this junk. 

2012’s Amazing Spider-Man

The Movie: Remember when Andrew Garfield’s Peter Parker had dinner with the Stacys and they offered him a branzino fish dinner, eventually sparking an internet blogging joke about the weird specificity of that moment?

The New Movie: Apparently, the new writers remembered it, because when Flash picks up Sally Avril, his date, he mentions that he had to send back his dinner because he knows what real Mediterranean branzino looks like. Talk about a really obscure reference.

Ultimate Spider-Man No. 37

The Comic: In the Ultimate Spider-Man series, Peter is often fighting in and out of his school, home, shopping mall, etc. The peak of these kinds of battles happens when Peter, out of costume, has to fight Venom on the football field behind his school, all while classes continue nearby.

The Movie: This isn’t an intentional reference, but again I couldn’t help but think of this moment when Peter fights the powered-up Shocker in the bus parking lot during the homecoming dance. There’s definite magic to be had when Peter’s life directly interacts with the fantastical world of Spider-Man.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 33

The Comic: Perhaps the most iconic moment from any Spider-Man comics, outside of his origin story, is a moment from what’s known as the “Master Planner Saga.” In it, Spider-Man is buried under tons of steel, just out of reach from a vial of medicine that would cure his dying aunt, and the room is flooding with water. It’s a hopeless moment, but Spider-Man convinces himself that he can persevere and slowly lifts the steel over his head. The way it is drawn by Steve Ditko is a master class in comic book storytelling.

The Movie: The Vulture buries Peter under a similar pile of rubble, pinning him with little option for survival. It’s visually nearly identical to the comic book sequence. In sync with the themes of the film, Peter convinces himself that he is Spider-Man, with or without the suit, repeatedly referring to himself as “Spider-Man” as he lifts the rubble from overhead. It’s a moment Marvel Studios head Kevin Feige championed for the film.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 2

The Comic: When Peter’s spider-sense is triggered or the artist wants to signify that he’s responding to something related to his Spider-Man persona, they might use the visual motif of a split-faced Peter/Spider-Man. Comic readers were initially confused by this visual, thinking perhaps that half of Peter’s body was suddenly covered in a costume, but it was quickly adopted as the perfect visual representation of his dueling identities.

The Movie: When Peter is pinned under the rubble, that visual representation is reflected back to him in a puddle of water, where his mask is floating.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 1

The Comic: Spider-Man’s first heroic adventure involved him saving J. Jonah Jameson’s son, John Jameson, from a failed launch of his space shuttle. Spider-Man had to find a way to get airborne and attach himself to the shuttle, saving the occupants and drawing the attention of the cigar-chewing media mogul.

The Movie: The comparison between this sequence and the Stark invisible jet sequence at the end of Spider-Man: Homecoming is apparent, with several panels looking nearly identical to the final film. Either way, it’s fun to see Spider-Man put in an extreme-height scenario with no way of landing safely if he were to fall.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 12

The Comic: In a famous moment, Doctor Octopus kidnaps Peter’s girlfriend Betty Brant and takes her to Coney Island, dangling her from the top of the Ferris wheel. When Peter confronts him as Spider-Man, Otto tears off Peter’s mask, revealing his identity to the public. Fortunately, Peter is able to spin that he dressed up as Spider-Man in hopes of rescuing his girlfriend.

The Movie: The film comes to a conclusion at Coney Island, utilizing all the elements that Peter famously fought on in the comic. While it might not be a direct reference to the original comics, the location is famous in Spider-Man lore, so it is nice to see it finally featured onscreen.

Amazing Spider-Man No. 529

The Comic: Right before the events of Civil War, Tony built Spider-Man a new suit, dubbed the Iron Spider suit. It allowed him to fly and generally do all the things Iron Man could. When Spider-Man decided to turn against Iron Man in the midst of Civil War, Tony attempted to control Spider-Man through the suit, but he wasn’t counting on Peter’s intellect to allow him to rewire it against him.

The Movie: Not only does Iron Man create the classic, but enhanced, version of Peter’s iconic suit, he presents him with his own cinematic version of the Iron Spider suit at the end of the film, in a moment that directly mimics the comics. It’s the thematic climax of the film and Peter’s denial of Tony’s offer signifies his maturation.

Civil War No. 2

The Comic: In order to get superheroes to sign up for the Superhuman Registration Act in Civil War, Tony Stark asked Peter Parker to reveal his secret identity to a crowd of reporters. Peter agreed, throwing his life into chaos and putting his family in danger.

The Movie: Tony seems to be asking Peter to do a similar thing at the end of Homecoming. He’s assembled a press briefing to at least announce Spider-Man’s role on the Avengers team. The visuals mirror those from the Civil War comic, and who could say how far Tony would have asked him to go?

The Comic: Megingjord is Thor’s enchanted Belt of Strength. When he wears it his strength is amplified considerably. He’s lost it several times in the books, eventually recovering it in a heroic moment.

The Movie: Happy Hogan mentions that they are shipping this item in his invisible jet, but he has trouble pronouncing the word … which makes total sense.

Amazing Spider-Man Annual No. 3

The Comic: When the Avengers test Spider-Man to see if he can join the team, they give him an impossible task that he is meant to fail. He’s supposed to go and wrangle the Hulk and bring him back to them. Instead, Peter discovers Hulk’s true identity and his tragic story and decides that it’d be against his morals to complete the quest. He returns to the Avengers and tells them to take a long walk off a short pier.

The Movie: Peter spends the entire runtime of Spider-Man: Homecoming trying to prove himself to Tony Stark so that he might join the Avengers team. Yet, through his time as Spider-Man he learns a valuable lesson about himself, so that when he is offered the position on the Avengers team he turns it down to continue his friendly neighborhood lifestyle. Was I the only one fist-pumping in the theater?

Amazing Spider-Man (Vol. 2) No. 35

The Comic: After Spider-Man’s epic battle with Morlun in the “Coming Home” story, one of the best Spider-Man tales ever told, he’s beaten, bloodied and in a bad need of a long nap. He passes out on his bed, oblivious to the world, when Aunt May returns home to find him on the edge of death in his bed, his costume in tatters. It is at this moment that May discovers that Peter is Spider-Man.

The Movie: Peter returns home from Tony’s offer to join the Avengers to find a bag with his new costume in it. He dresses up, after presuming his Aunt May (Marisa Tomei) isn’t home. That’s exactly when she walks in and ends the movie with a, “What the f—!”

OK web-heads. What did we miss? Tweet the comic book panel (and issue number) to @HeatVisionBlog and we will update this post with the best tweets.

Dan Gvozden, a life-long Spider-Man fan, is a Heat Vision contributor and co-host of Amazing Spider-Talk podcast.

Source

#Book #Comic #Easter #Eggs #Homecoming #References #SpiderMan #Story

#Book #Comic #Easter #Eggs #Homecoming #References #SpiderMan #Story

[aion-rsa]

Spider-Man: No Way Home Trailer Breakdown and Analysis

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

It’s finally here. We truly never thought it would arrive for awhile. But sure enough, the first Spider-Man: No Way Home trailer has arrived. And just as you might have expected from the veil of secrecy that surrounded it, it would appear that at least SOME of the crazy multiversal rumors about this movie are true.

From its MCU multiverse shattering central concept to the presence of both Benedict Cumberbatch’s Doctor Strange and Alfred Molina’s Doctor Octopus (with hints of even more characters yet to be revealed), Spider-Man: No Way Home looks like the biggest Marvel movie since Avengers: Endgame, and seems likely to set up future MCU Phase 4 projects, most notably Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness.

In other words, there’s a lot to unpack here. Here’s everything we’ve found so far. Oh, and just in case you haven’t watched it yet, here’s that trailer for you:

OK, now let’s get to work…

The Fallout From Far From Home

As we all remember, the previous Spider-Man movie, Spider-Man: Far From Home had a rather shocking ending, and one that didn’t exactly leave Peter in the best place. Thanks to the machinations of Mysterio, Peter found his secret identity outed by J. Jonah Jameson, and the world now knows he’s really Spider-Man.

We see glimpses of this in the opening moments, with Peter seeming to have a combination celebrity/pariah status, and it’s negatively affecting MJ and Ned Leeds as well. One classmate this seems to be going well for? Betty Brant, who we briefly glimpse on a TV screen in the high school, presumably reporting on this whole mess.

One fun detail about this? MJ is reading the real world New York Post, which on its own isn’t funny (the Post is a rag…except for the sports coverage), but in the Sam Raimi Spider-Man movies the Daily Bugle’s logo and layout were clearly modeled on the Post‘s. Another subtle reminder that this isn’t the world of the Raimi movies, and that The Daily Bugle of the MCU probably spent the last five years telling people to take Ivermectin to bring their “snapped” loved ones back.

That headline says “Spider-Minions” and I’d bet the puppets on the webs are MJ and Ned. Zendaya’s “Yesss, my Spider-Lord,” is legit hilarious, though. Not sure why the sports page would say “pray for New York”…UNLESS it’s about Spidey’s favorite baseball team, the New York Mets, for whom prayers are not enough.

Later on in the trailer, we see Spidey and Michelle being hounded by new helicopters, so this isn’t going well. But they take refuge on top of a bridge which…

Peter! You better Spidey your ass right the hell down off that bridge right this instant! You know what happens when you bring your girlfriends to bridges. Knock it off!

Steve Ditko

Let’s take a moment to appreciate the fact that Steve Ditko co-created both Spider-Man and Doctor Strange and here they are sharing the screen in an impossibly mega-budgeted film. Ditko absolutely would have hated this for any number of reasons, but especially because he barely ever saw a dime from all the Spidey and Strange merchandise through the years.

Why am I bringing this up (aside from the obvious)? Because Ditko’s name is literally in the first shot of the trailer, as some graffiti on the wall behind Peter and MJ. I’m sure Mr. Ditko wouldn’t have approved of street artists like this, either.

Damage Control

We see Peter being interrogated by someone in law enforcement, and it’s clear that Mysterio’s frame job is sticking pretty well. But wait…look more closely at the insignia on this guy’s jacket.

He’s not an ordinary fed, that DODC stands for Department of Damage Control. Remember them from Spider-Man: Homecoming? These are the folks who get called in to take care of the messes after big superhero/supervillain battles.

Here Comes Daredevil?

While there’s no official sign of Charlie Cox as Matt Murdock in this trailer, it sure seems like Peter could use a good lawyer right about now, and it’s hard to imagine a better time to bring in Daredevil, the most beloved character from Marvel’s Netflix era. Unless, of course, the faceless individual who slams a stack of files down in front of Peter is, in fact, Murdock.

Anyway, it should come as no surprise that Peter wants his secret identity back, and he’s already fought side by side with exactly the kind of guy who could help him do exactly that. Of course, the thing that reminds him of this are these Halloween decorations that look like if someone tried to describe Doctor Strange to Jon Favreau’s Happy Hogan and then Happy went and whipped up some cosplay based on the description.

It’s kind of cool that this movie seems to at least partially take place around Halloween. The MCU Spider-Man movies have always had a particular sense of time that most MCU flicks lack (although yes, Virginia, Iron Man 3 is a Christmas movie). Spider-Man: Homecoming took place at the start of the school year in September, while Spider-Man: Far From Home was a summer vacation movie. Assuming the end of that film was late summer, Peter has been dealing with his new and hellish existence for anywhere from 60-90 days by this point in the trailer.

Paging Doctor Strange…Doctor Stephen Strange

Benedict Cumberbatch returns as Doctor Strange for the first time since Avengers: Endgame, and he appears to be doing well for himself. He does, however, seem a little too eager to help Peter by casting a spell that is meant to either just erase the memory of the world that Peter is Spider-Man, or perhaps as Peter puts it, make it so Mysterio never went public with his identity.

Hell, Wong even shows up to till him what a mistake that would be. And Stephen being Stephen he, well, he ignores the hell out of him.

Also worth noting that Peter trying to wish his troubles away via magic is ALSO the basic idea of one of the most hated Spider-Man stories in all of history, the loathed “One More Day” which undid Peter’s marriage to Mary Jane in exchange for the life of Aunt May.

The Broken Spell

Of course, leave it to Peter’s anxious ass to have second thoughts at the last minute. You see, he wants Aunt May, MJ, and Ned to remember the fact that he’s Spider-Man. On the one hand, that’s nice, and reminds us that Peter is a good kid who still feels guilty about deceiving his friends. On the other hand, look at the big picture, dude! You can just…reveal your secret to them after the fact!

Also…is something wrong with Doctor Strange? For one thing, he never should have agreed to this. But for another, it’s clear that something isn’t quite right in the Sanctum Sanctorum since it’s snowing indoors. Is Strange having trouble with his magic for some reason? Will this be one of the things we have to deal with in Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness?

The Multiverse

Anyway, Peter’s interruption screws everything up. How? That’s not entirely clear just yet. But it seems to be the nexus event that either sends Peter into other corners of the MCU multiverse or allows variants from other Spidey realities to start filtering in to the Sacred Timeline.

The Black and Gold Spider-Man Costume

The long-rumored black and gold Spider-Man costume seems to make its first appearance here. Is this a new suit Peter has whipped up, or is he Quantum Leaping into some variant form of himself elsewhere in the multiverse?

This scene also appears to take place in the charity where Aunt May works.

Get Ready for the Sinister Six

We get the introductions (well, re-introductions) of at least three villains in this trailer, and three is halfway to six, which can only mean that Sony has finally found a way to do that supervillain team-up Sinister Six movie they’ve been threatening us with for so long.

Electro

Is this lightning bolt blowing up police cars our first confirmation that Jamie Foxx’s Electro from the film we’d all rather forget, The Amazing Spider-Man 2, is indeed making his return here? There’s another shot that also makes me think this is more than just some multiversal storm.

Green Goblin

Willem Dafoe’s Green Goblin is definitely about to make an appearance! That’s a pumpkin bomb, alright, and you can just barely hear his sinister cackle.

Doctor Octopus Returns

And, of course, the biggest applause moment in the trailer comes with the return of Alfred Molina as Doctor Octopus, one of the great big screen supervillains of all time. Is his “hello, Peter” directed at Tom Holland’s Peter Parker? Or is possible that he’s addressing another Peter entirely…perhaps one played by Tobey Maguire?

In any case, this scene looks like it might happen right after that pumpkin bomb explosion, which would mean that Doctor Octopus and Green Goblin have already teamed up by this point. Who else might be joining them in battle? We’ll find out soon enough…

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Spider-Man: No Way Home opens on Dec. 17. The full schedule of upcoming MCU Phase 4 and 5 movies can be found here.

Want to point out a Spider-Man or MCU Easter egg we missed? Just want to freak out about how cool this looks? Let us know in the comments!

The post Spider-Man: No Way Home Trailer Breakdown and Analysis appeared first on Den of Geek.

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Spider-Man, Venom & the Sad, Sad Story of Eddie Brock

Marvel Comics recently announced that Eddie Brock, the original man beneath the evil symbiote, will be returning in this April’s “Venom” #6. With such a momentous occasion, we felt it only appropriate to take a look at the history of Eddie Brock, which is sadly a pretty bleak history when all is said and done.

RELATED: Eddie Brock Returns in Venom #6

Eddie Brock debuted in the classic “Amazing Spider-Man” #300 by David Michelinie and Todd McFarlane, where he confronted Spider-Man and revealed just who he was and why he had bonded with the alien symbiote that Spider-Man had brought to Earth from “Secret Wars” but had then had broken away from with help from the Fantastic Four and the symbiotes weakness to flames and sonic weapons.

Eddie, you see, was a successful columnist for the Daily Globe, a rival newspaper to the Daily Bugle. He wrote a series of very popular columns about the serial killer known as the Sin-Eater. The series gained so much attention that he was contacted by the Sin-Eater himself! Or at least, a man named Emil Gregg, who claimed to be the Sin-Eater. He gave Eddie a series of interviews. They became a media sensation, but Eddie was hounded by the authorities to turn over the identity of the Sin-Eater. He refused, until finally, in one sensational story that was on the front page of the Globe, he revealed to the world the identity of the Sin-Eater!

The problem, though, was that Emil Gregg was not the Sin-Eater! Police detective Stan Carter was. When Spider-Man defeated the real Sin-Eater and unmasked him, Brock’s career was ruined. He was fired from the Globe. Brock’s mother died in childbirth, and his father blamed him for it the rest of Eddie’s life. Eddie did everything he could to impress his father, but it never worked. So when he became an actual disgrace? It was too much for Eddie. He got work for some tabloids, but his life was in a spiral. His new obsessive hatred for Spider-Man also led to his wife divorcing him. Eddie began working out heavily at this time, transforming his body into basically a bodybuilder, but further separating him from his past. The pain was so much that he went from church to church trying to figure out a way to kill himself that wouldn’t violate his Roman Catholic beliefs. While at one church, the symbiote was hiding there (following a confrontation with Spider-Man in “Web of Spider-Man” #1 after it escaped from the Fantastic Four) and when it learned that Brock hated Spider-Man, as well, it bonded with Brock and they formed Venom! Since the symbiote had bonded with Spider-Man, it knew his secret identity, so now Venom did, as well. Spider-Man barely defeated him by forcing him to use up too much of his webbing.

RELATED: Marvel Releases Over 20 Venom-ized Variant Covers

Venom only appeared in two stories during McFarlane’s “Amazing Spider-Man” run, with him escaping from custody in “Amazing Spider-Man” #315 (by Michelinie and McFarlane) in a story that showed a disturbing aspect of Brock. He believed in protecting innocents, but he still had to kill sometimes, so he would really mourn the people he killed. He was truly broken as a person, as he believed he was doing good.

Brock’s desire to protect innocents (which Spider-Man, of course, was not), led to a bold gambit by Marvel. You see, after McFarlane’s run, Venom appeared in a very popular arc in the Erik Larsen stint as artist that followed. This was during the early 1990s when comics were selling millions. Venom was extremely popular, so Marvel wanted to cash in on that popularity. However, he was still a villain, so they felt kind of weird making him a feature character. But in “Amazing Spider-Man” #361 (by David Michelinie, Mark Bagley and Randy Emberlin), they introduced the spawn of the Venom symbiote, who merged with a serial killer named Cletus Kasady. The merged being called itself Carnage, and unlike Venom, it killed indiscriminately.

This was very important for Marvel as now they a villain to replace Venom, while Venom could become, in effect, an anti-hero, or, if you prefer, a “lethal protector.” This came to a head in “Amazing Spider-Man” #375 (by Michelinie, Bagley and Emberlin), where we first met Eddie’s ex-wife, Anne Weying. Brock had kidnapped Peter Parker’s parents (although he did not tell them that Peter was Spider-Man, as he wanted to protect their innocence) and Spider-Man, in turn, tracked down Anne so that she could try to reason with Eddie. When Silver Sable’s Wild Pack (who had been hired by J. Jonah Jameson) showed up to take Venom down, the battle knocked a tower over, which was going to crush Anne. Venom couldn’t stop it by himself, but then Spider-Man stepped in to aid him. This led to the famous Spider-Man/Venom truce of 1993. Venom would stop hunting Spider-Man, using his information about Spider-Man’s secret identity, and Spider-Man would not actively try to stop Venom (so long as Venom wasn’t going around killing people, of course).

Venom headed off for San Francisco, where he became a champion, of sorts, for the homeless population in that city. During his time there, he also spawned a few more symbiotes. Interestingly enough, almost immediately after finally leaving New York, Venom returned to fight alongside Spider-Man against Carnage in the crossover event, “Maximum Carnage,” where Spider-Man debated whether he had to adopt a more aggressive, Venom-like, approach to stop the evil Carnage and Carnage’s cronies. At a time when he was back in New York, Anne Weying ended up shot by a new Sin-Eater, so Brock makes the symbiote bond with Weying to heal her. After temporarily becoming She-Venom, Anne decided she wanted nothing to do with Brock or Venom ever again.

Likely spurred on by things like that, Brock began to question his relationship with the symbiote, but during the “Planet of the Symbiotes” crossover, he ended up having to fully commit to the symbiote, bonding permanently (well, as permanent as these things go) in “Web of Spider-Man Super Special #1 (by David Michelinie and Steve Lightle).

However, as the 1990s came to an end, Venom’s popularity had fallen a bit, enough so that Marvel decided that they could stop doing Venom series (neither of Marvel’s Editors-in-Chief of the decade, Tom DeFalco and Bob Harras, were fans of giving Venom his own series, which is why he only had a series of miniseries. They did not like the idea of giving a villain such a high profile). So there was a “Venom: Finale” book that ended with Eddie separated from the symbiote and with amnesia, and the character took a bit of a break.

When he returned in 2000 in the two relaunched “Spider-Man” titles, he fought Spider-Man a few times, but wasn’t really into it, not until “Amazing Spider-Man” #19 (by Howard Mackie, Erik Larsen and John Beatty), where Eddie tried to win Anne back, but Anne had locked herself up as she was afraid of the world and, most of all, the symbiote. Eddie forced her to open up her shades, and wouldn’t you know it, Spider-Man happened to swing by wearing the black costume (he was running low on costumes at the time). She freaked out and Eddie turned into Venom, which freaked her out even more. He didn’t notice that, of course, he just saw that Spider-Man upset her. When he returned, Anne had killed herself. Eddie blamed Spider-Man and the rivalry began again! It was cut short, though, when a villainous senator stole the symbiote.

RELATED: Is Venom’s New Host a Lethal Protector, or Just Lethal?

It returned to Eddie later on. The next big change in Eddie’s life occurred in “Spectacular Spider-Man” #4 (by Paul Jenkins, Humberto Ramos and Wayne Faucher), when the symbiote was trying desperately to re-attach itself to Spider-Man. This was because, as Eddie revealed to Spider-Man, Eddie was dying of cancer!

The symbiote kept Eddie alive for a while, but finally, in “Marvel Knights: Spider-Man” #6 (by Mark Millar, Terry Dodson and Rachel Dodson), he decides to auction off the symbiote so that he just get on with the end of his life.

He made $100 million, which he gave to charity (the symbiote was purchased by a mobster, but it quickly dropped the son of the mobster and bonded with another Spider-Man villain, Mac Gargan, the Scorpion). Without the symbiote, Brock’s cancer got progressively worse, but since Brock was such a popular character in his heyday, writers seemed like they were hesitant to be the be the one who finally killed him off. So he would keep making guest appearances as he got sicker and sicker and sicker. He began to hallucinate that the Venom symbiote was still talking to him and at one point the hallucinations almost got him to kill Aunt May. At the end of that story, he does try to kill himself, but he fails.

He later went to work for a soup kitchen owned by Martin Li, who was secretly the criminal known as Mister Negative. Li’s magical powers cured Eddie of his cancer. What Eddie didn’t know is that Li cured him by sort of super-charging the white blood cells in his body. When Eddie got involved in a fight between Spider-Man and the then-current Venom, Mac Gargan, touching the venom symbiote kickstarted residual traces of the symbiote within himself and, combined with the almost magical effect Li had on him, Eddie created a white symbiote that was deadly for the original symbiote. He called himself, appropriately enough, Anti-Venom!

When Anti-Venom figured out that Li was a bad guy, it messed him up pretty good, since Li was his savior, after all. Plus, if Li was his savior and hewas evil, then did that make Anti-Venom evil? He ultimately figured out that it did not, and he teamed up with Spider-Man to take Mister Negative down (well, at least expose Martin Li as a villain).

However, soon afterwards, Eddie had to give up the Anti-Venom symbiote for it to be transformed into a serum that would cure everyone during “Spider-Island.”

As we have seen a lot of times over the years, Eddie is pretty easily rattled and very easy to use faith as an excuse for him to do some awful things. So now that he was sans-symbiote, he decided that it was his duty to kill all other symbiotes, as he determined that symbiotes were inherently evil. He showed up in the pages of Flash Thompson’s “Venom” series. While working his way up to Flash Thompson’s symbiote, he killed a few other symbiotes along the way.

Back in the last year or so of Eddie’s original time as Venom, a new symbiote shown up, that was spawned from Carnage. This symbiote was called Toxin and it bonded with a police officer. In the pages of “Venom,” Eddie was captured by the evil Crime Buster and forcibly bonded with the Toxin symbiote, which had been removed from its original host (tragically, the heroic host was killed in the process). This was not a pleasant experience for a man who had just devoted himself to destroying all symbiotes.

As Toxin, Eddie has most recently become part of a team of people hunting down Carnage in the pages of “Carnage.” Eddie has a little bit more control over the symbiote, and he appears a bit like how Flash Thompson did when Thompson was Agent: Venom.

In the history of comic books, characters tend to eventually revert to the most famous version of those characters. Eddie Brock is clearly the most famous version of Venom that there has been, but he has now been separated from the symbiote for over a decade. That’s a long time to keep from reverting to the original status quo, but it appears as though that time has come to an end. We don’t know if Eddie will be permanently bonding with Venom, though, so we still have to find out come April. If he does, though, we will see if it ends up with Eddie Brock being any happier than he has been in the past. It doesn’t seem particularly likely.

The post Spider-Man, Venom & the Sad, Sad Story of Eddie Brock appeared first on CBR.com.

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