#its been too many years of nothing my childhood and teen life sucked my adult life sucks i dont want to have 60+ more years of this

[thelastofgala]

I started The Last of Us, Pt. 2 last night, and here are my first impressions, musings on parallelism, Naturalism, Ellie’s characterization, Joel’s characterization, the “presence” of Riley, gameplay, story development, and more:

***SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT***

Starting with Joel. I always imagined The Last of Us 2 would begin at the end of Joel’s journey, though I will say that I did not expect to pick up so close to the end of the first game. I thought they would start us somewhere COMPLETELY out of context. Like I was prepared for much deeper flashback. In this way, I really felt like I was playing a sequel, which is not a bad thing. I just had no idea how they were going to frame this. The compelling thing about starting with Joel is that it immediately sets up parallels between Joel and Sarah, the character we start with in The Last of Us. There’s no way this was not a pointed decision. Just like it was with Sarah, Joel is our point of reference in a new, strange world. His point of view in this new world is all that we know. We don’t know what the new special world contains, and we don’t know grown-up Ellie at all. Plus, old fans will have missed him. It is a comfort to be Joel, and like a daughter protected by her father, a false and short-lived comfort. We are also now thinking of Joel as, like Sarah, someone who is in danger, whose agency is compromised, who, for whatever reason, is weakened this time around, and who may not survive the story. 

I will say, too, that I really loved that after the 4-years-later cut, Joel is held off-screen. He and Tommy are out on a patrol. They are out there, in danger, and that sort of restraint is really effective. We are ALWAYS looking for Joel, just like we were in the run-up to the release, because he is the only person we truly know in this strange, new world. ND knows and takes advantage of this.

There are many parallels between Joel and Riley. Both Joel and Riley sneak up on Ellie during their first interaction. They’re even wearing similar colors. Both Joel and Riley lied to Ellie in the previous story, and both betrayed her as an act of self-preservation. In Left Behind, Ellie is somewhat chilly toward Riley in the beginning, even as her younger, more optimistic self, just as Ellie is chilly toward Joel in the beginning of The Last of Us 2. Still, you can tell through Ellie’s dialogue with Dina that she and Joel are knitted together—he defended her against the bigoted bartender, and she appreciates this even if she doesn’t outright say it. They share taste in movies and have plans to watch a movie together soon. I haven’t interacted with Joel in the current timeline, but I do know that in Left Behind, Riley has to earn back Ellie’s trust and take measures to reenter her good graces, and that this is a large part of their relationship arc. I also know that, by the time they reconcile, it proves to be too late. The world will not let them have what they want, and nothing is simple. All of these parallels worry me a lot, as Left Behind, while still driven by a strong undercurrent of love (it is a love story, interwoven with Ellie’s desperate search for medical supplies in a bid to save Joel’s life), is a much bleaker, sadder story than The Last of Us, and it has a tragic ending.

Joel's conversation with Tommy feels important. I was very glad to hear Tommy say that he would have made the same choice, in terms of saving Ellie or letting her die for the possibility of a cure. It shows that Tommy is more like Joel than perhaps we knew. Plus, Maria will have taught him something about love and commitment, as the notion of saving the one you love above all else should make more sense to him now that he has foregone the youthful idealism of the Fireflies in order to focus on the practical wisdom of family. As a parent, I understand Joel’s decision to save Ellie at the end of The Last of Us and know I would have done the same. I also understand why Joel lied, even though I think it was the wrong choice. Hearing him confide all of this in Tommy was cathartic. It was also very characteristic of Joel to respond that Ellie “didn’t say nothing otherwise” when Tommy asks if she believed him. In all of his denial, Joel chooses to believe what is conveniently in front of him, even if he knows it’s untrue. Also, I couldn’t tell, but was that a Firefly logo on that guitar he’s shining up? Maybe I hallucinated that. But if it is, I do wonder where he got it.

Ellie’s character is much more deadpan and ruminative in young adulthood. She seems tired, and a little lacking in self-esteem and sort of immediately defeated by what happened during the experience with Joel. When Joel sang, we could see her return to that place, just a glimmer, and her response—that it “didn’t suck”—shows how she still shields her heart with sarcasm, something Dina points out to her later on (“Did I ruin your punchline?”). Joel has been broken down by the events of The Last of Us and now bears his soul to her with his music, unabashed and dedicated to her, and Ellie is now the stoic one, unshakable, sealed inside a heavy, protective armor that seems impossible to pierce. I look forward to getting to know Ellie as a young adult and, ultimately, crying a lot. She is artistic and honest and still a little soft underneath. You can tell by her early interactions with Dina especially that she can still blush, and she can still come undone.

I love the snowball fight lol. I am always so frustrated when these big environment games, like Red Dead 2, Dragon Age, etc., don’t have any kids running around. Why don’t these stories pay attention to kids? Kids exist. They are an important part of almost any open world or quasi open world environment. I love the presence of kids in The Last of Us 2, because the loss of childhood innocence is an important theme for Ellie as a character. It’s also clear we’re trying to set up the edenic innocence of Jackson. It is childhood, in a way, and just like childhood, it will come to inevitable corruption. The scene, too, reminded me of Ellie and Riley on their teen dream adventure, romping through the Halloween store at the mall, trying on masks and talking to the magic eight ball.

I’m really pleased by all the parallels with Left Behind and Ellie’s portion of the journey in The Last of Us. Winter was her season, and that’s where we’re starting now. The horseback riding, the blizzard, and all the blood in the snow bring flashbacks of Ellie hunting on the woods, Ellie alone in the frozen mall, David, and the Lakeside Resort, all of which layer the current moment with a lot of emotional tension for the player.

The opening is, I think, sprawling. I’m having fun but there’s this sense that I haven’t even begun to scratch the surface of the story. Like Joel in the first game, Ellie is also big-timing me a little and I feel far away from her. I know this will change soon, and I’ll warm up to her, but for now, like Joel, we’re all being held at arm’s length. I actually like the POV shifts we’ve gotten so far and the multiple POVs is something I predicted a while ago, based on ND’s tendencies in the first game. Ppl are going to give The Last of Us 2 shit for being too cinematic but tbh it sometimes feels more like a playable novel than a traditional video game. We’re on a cable car headed straight into disaster and there’s nothing we can do. In this way the game is using the medium itself to perpetuate its Naturalistic themes. We play and we play, and we fight and we fight, but the environment entertains no interest in our struggle and the outcome will always be the same. There is no free will in The Last of Us.

On that note, the gameplay so far is, I think, pretty fun. I have played a lot of stealth games and am always looking for ways the genre is reinventing itself. Like Sekiro and Tomb Raider, The Last of Us 2 is increasing the verticality of the map with rope climbing and scaling up obstacles (though I do miss using Joel’s immense upper body strength to move those dumpsters around lol). In a stealth game I want creativity and problem solving to be central to the gameplay. I don’t want to be magically handed tools and weapons on a constant basis, to meet every individual need. I want to be forced into resourcefulness, and I don’t want to enter a shoot-out unless I absolutely have to. That said, I’m nearly to the tower checkpoint with Dina, and I’ve only fired my gun twice. The dodge/melee mechanic is neat, but more than anything, having real, actionable help from an AI enables stealth kills even in zones crawling with enemies. On that note, I am playing with a headset, and I’m glad I am, because I find the sounds of the goddam clickers to be all-encompassing this time around and a LOT bigger and scarier than they were in The Last of Us. Holy shit. They’re absolutely terrifying. I can only imagine the horror to come lol.

Now, finally, Abby: I don’t have much to offer on this yet. Abby is not who I thought she’d be. I’ll just say it. Still, the melee battle with her and the runners in the woods was AWESOME. For me, the most fun I’ve had yet, because it was completely different than anything from The Last of Us. Playing her, however, I will say, filled me with foreboding. I didn’t want to be there. I didn’t want to help her. She seems beyond desperate and while deeply sympathetic, she is a new character and her loyalties are not mine...so far. I could be very wrong, and please don’t correct me if I am, but I get the sense she might be a Firefly, or somehow associated with Marlene, and she is looking for Joel, in vengeance. Her group was small and rogue, and they seemed new to the area. All I know is that ND is creating a moral dilemma here, and as to what will become of this, the jury is still out completely.

One small personal criticism, take it or leave it: I don’t personally love that the kiss with Dina and scene with Joel defending Ellie was kept off-stage in the game and left to the trailer. We could have started at the dance. That would have taught us everything we need to know about Ellie, Dina, Jesse, and Joel and Ellie’s relationship state. This is my only criticism of the story so far. From a writer’s perspective, it’s just inefficient and clumsy to try and cover all that in expositional dialogue, taking into consideration that many casual players will not have seen all the trailers. Even still, it’s not hurting my experience in any way. Just an observation and maybe a bit of personal opinion on the fact that perhaps the choice to reveal so much scene in pre-release trailers might be a great way to build hype but might not be the most efficient choice in telling the actual story. My two cents!

In the end, I’m overall super excited and can’t wait to keep playing. These are just my own personal thoughts, and I’ll be back with more thoughts soon!! PLEASE NO SPOILERS OR SPOILERY SUGGESTIONS IN THE REPLIES!! I am NOT privy to the leaks and I do NOT want to know what’s coming. Thank you!! ^_^ 

#tlou2 #The Last of Us 2 #tlou2 spoilers #the last of us 2 spoilers #the last of us part 2 #gala's thoughts

[nosybookworm]

Ninja Academy vs Hero School Rant

Naruto was my jam back in the day. I stayed up late to watch the new episodes, bought the dvd box sets and manga volumes, collected toys and cards just to stare at adoringly, even pretended to be sick so that I could stay home and watch a Naruto marathon. Point is, I LOVED Naruto.

I was invested in the characters. My heart ached for every single character that gave me a backstory. I ugly cried on more than ten occasions.

The action and moral dilemmas sucked me in and spit me out, made me the person I am today thinking critically about the stuff I love because wow that universe is in no way safe or sane for the people living in it lol.

The villains absolutely TERRIFIED me DESPITE STILL WANTING TO SEE MORE OF THEM, Orochimaru alone had me sleeping with the lights on and ripping the arms off his action figure just to be safe.

When I started watching My Hero Academia those old happy feelings started slapping me in the face drawing me in. MHA hits a lot of the same points that Naruto had and I didn’t really notice until the end of season 3 because those points weren’t as in-your-face or emotionally impactful as it was in Naruto I guess. Not to say it didn’t have an impact! Just that it rolled off me a lot easier which might just be a me problem.

I Mean:

The main character getting bullied/excluded because of something he can’t control. 

Underdog character then meeting or making an emotional connection with a mentor figure truly feeling “acceptance” for maybe the first time and taking that all important first step toward their life long dream. 

A teacher willing to sacrifice himself to protect the students. 

A school training teens to protect/serve. 

Rivalry that may or may not be actual friendship.

Students fighting against each other to “rank up” by showing how capable they are to their superiors.

Enemies invading to terrorize the kids and escaping to terrorize another day.

Traumatic family backstories that child will now attempt to seek justice through own power.

Previous underdog character actually having a secret power that no one knows about but a select few and that he has to train to learn how to use, but it makes him a powerhouse that is always surprising the enemy and inspiring his fellows.

Sure all that can be tied to any story when generalized like this, but the way MHA presents them is pretty similar to Naruto.

(Okay, ALL OF THIS is going to be my personal opinion. Things I want to say to get out of my system so that I can move on. It’s long too. So, now that you’ve been warned continue on.)

The more I got into it the stranger it felt because despite hitting those same points I loved they hit in a different way that....well... made me a little uncomfortable to sit through.

Like Aizawa

Very clearly the Kakashi in MHA. He’s sly hardly ever telling his students the truth but has incredibly high expectations of them, has been known to expel students left and right until his most recent batch of kids, is ready and willing to throw himself in harms way for them, and surprisingly competent despite his exhausted persona/personality. However the way these two teachers act get two very different results from me. Naruto got a chance to introduce Kakashi in a way that endeared him to me, the bell test was more than just showcasing the kids current abilities it was introducing Kakashi (the Jounin that is a kind of jack of all trades, the known perv that will publicly read porn, the guy that will happily mess with a bunch of kids to “teach them a lesson” and because its funny, the guy that requires the students under his care to care about each other because caring for his team matters to him more than any mission, that guy). MHA gave the quirk test. Aizawa mostly in the background taking notes and jotting down scores after his speech about expelling whoever comes last. We didn’t get to hear Aizawa’s thoughts until the very end when Izuku surprised him. 

I didn’t really feel any connection toward Aizawa until I stumbled across fanfics that wrote him more involved with the students and I think that’s the problem. Aizawa is dedicated to his student’s education, he believes they will all be amazing heroes one day, but he hardly ever interacts with them. He can be seen watching their training from afar, sleeping in a corner as another teacher takes over for a bit, protecting them from danger or fighting along side them, and proudly declaring that Bakugo would never turn villain but all of that means very little emotionally when I can’t see him making connections with these students to make this standoffish confidence understandable. He comes off as one of those super smart teachers that have undecipherable lessons because he has no idea how to connect with his students enough to explain in way they understand. Similarly, he like jots down that he’s taking note of Bakugo and might need to step in before he goes down the wrong path but then does nothing and confidently tells the press Bakugo would never be a villain.

Kakashi was pretty standoffish too, no denying that, and the little episodes when the kids conspire to try to see him without his mask are the kind of outside interactions that would be weird for a modern teacher-student relationship like in MHA, so I get why Aizawa doesn’t really have that with any of the kids. However, Kakashi saw the path Sasuke was going down and spent time with him and confronted him about it (it did nothing to stop him but he tried). He took time to find a teacher for Naruto. He was present and awake for just about every milestone in there education with him. He told them when he was proud of them not other people. He involved himself in some of their high jinks to measure their growth and as such was able to have confidence in them when they went off on their own.

The Villains

And My Hero Academia villains, namely All For One. 

I felt nothing when he showed up. I was all caught up in All Might and his passing of the torch. The guy without eyes didn’t feel threatening, didn’t feel like the big bad he was suppose to be. The League of Villains really didn’t feel like “serious enemies” either cause I actually really enjoyed them when they were on screen for their dynamics with each other. Similar to how I liked the Akatsuki in their more light-hearted scenes when they where super strong idiots banded together by sheer force of will and explosive personalities that refuse to leave a job half finished. With the League I would be just as entertained (probably more so) if they were in a slice of life anime just being terrible people together.

I get the feeling All For One was supposed to be MHA’s Orochimaru. (And I say this despite knowing Orochimaru’s introduction is probably a lot closer to Stain what with the confrontation and all, but his whole “the world is corrupt, I will cut out the wrong and remake it into the pure world it should have always been” aligned more with Pain especially with his quick turnabout saving Izuku.) 

Orochimaru always felt in control even when he was in hiding or on the run, he felt like he had more up his sleeve which is the only thing I got from All For One when he was imprisoned. Both Orochimaru and All For One showed up out of nowhere, very obviously in a class of their own that the teenage main characters had no hope of beating, and a mysterious backstory that clearly put all the adults in the know on edge. But I just don’t see All For One as a villain. Nothing about him screamed “Run for your lives this man will smile as he tears you apart!” like Orochimaru. Nothing about All For One’s secret Mad Scientist lab gave me creepy vibes that left me on the edge of my seat clutching at the nearest pillow the way the Sound Village that practically worshiped Orochimaru and the many base of operations he had did.

Terrible Parents

The Todoroki family. 

...

Look. The world of Naruto has terrible parenting, but they also live in a dictator/military run nation where kids can be a front-line defense or key players in a war zone so it’s hard to measure how to view these people. Cause a father that beats his kid and yells at him to get stronger has genuine reasons to rightfully freak out when children as young as 8 get sent to ninja academy. Families that have a rare genetic trait like the Hyuga or Uchiha have every right to be tough and stern if they feel that will protect their kids when they know putting them out into the world makes them an easier target for enemies that would rip out their eyes. 

I can judge their actions based on their consequences. Like the Uchiha clan planning a revolt forcing their eldest to massacre them to keep the peace and their youngest to live with a crazy amount of trauma. Like the Hyuga clan branding their branch members to protect family eyes, but forcing them into being lesser than the main branch and all the trauma that forced on Neji’s poor head. The stupid level of expectation set on Hinata’s young shoulders that she couldn’t meet in the way her clan wanted that made her self-confidence practically non existent. The Hokage leaving Naruto mostly alone for his entire childhood in a village that openly hated him. The Kazekage trying to have his lonely three-year-old assassinated multiple times once by his beloved uncle - the only person that was kind and loved him - that scarred him so entirely that he carved “love” into his forehead and rampaged around the village and did casual murder intentionally for years before meeting Naruto. 

All that... I can get behind as abuse. I want those sad kids to be happy. They deserved better and I will happily lose myself in a fix-it fic where they get that.

MHA gives me similar scenarios but without the clear-cut consequences that shows when parenting for that world is abuse. 

Endeavor is not a good husband. He is emotionally abusive to his wife to the point she has a mental break and attacks a child. 

However, in a world of heroes, in a world where high school students are trained to protect and serve and that self sacrifice is a noble heroic trait. How do I compare such a society to my own? They put children in harms way with hero internships yet don’t allow them to defend themselves if they don’t have a hero license, that would be like getting a learners permit but not being allowed to practice driving.

All this to say I have a hard time telling when bad parenting falls into abuse when it comes to MHA. Endeavor is not a good parent, he is an abusive husband, but is he an abusive parent? As a hero training up the next generation of heroes can it be argued that he is pretty okay even if his methods are a little harsh? None of his children fear him from what I’ve seen. Shouto happily tells him his plans to never use his fire and all the reasons why without fearing he might be punished for it. The other kids seem to be pretty okay going on with their lives. Toya being the exception but again I don’t know what happened to him and he’s a follower of Stain so did he have a falling out with heroes or did his father push too hard?

Nighteye & Tsunade

Okay so this is where I get super rant-y. I have feelings on Nighteye and none of them good.

Nighteye being the estranged comrade of All Might the underdog’s teacher, Tsunade being the estranged comrade of Jiraiya Naruto’s teacher.

Tsunade has been hurt deeply. She ran because she felt that was the only way to save herself from more pain. Here comes Jiraiya with his new little tag along demanding she come back home, she gets appropriately angry and tries everything she can to get them to leave her alone. Naruto being the special little underdog that he is immediately gets under her skin reminding her of all the loved ones she lost bringing back all of that old pain back, so she gets even. She beats him down and challenges him to an impossible challenge to show him how small he really is and get out of her own responsibilities. But he wins. He wins, and shows Tsunade how closed off she’s become forcing her to face reality head on and face her fears at last. He changes her whole world view through action.

Nighteye has been hurt deeply. He sees the future for every person he touches and as such sees futures in which people he loves get hurt and sometimes die. He believes there is nothing he or anyone can do to change these visions. All Might is his hero, His friend and mentor, his comrade. His friend gets hurt in a way he can never fully recover from and he sees a vision where his friend dies on the battle field. He then tells All Might who refuses to retire and leaves without a backward glance. They don’t speak until years later when Nighteye picks out a successor for One For All, but Toshi chooses Izuku and never meets Nighteye’s pick.

Izuku, needing an internship not Gran Torino, goes to Sir Nighteye All Might’s old side kick. He gets tested, told he’s not worthy of One For All, and has to work under this man as he tries to get Izuku to see how Mirio is more worthy of All Might’s quirk.��Facing off against Overhaul when they are at their most desperate Nighteye uses his quirk to see what will happen and sees the worst possible scenario. They lose. Then Izuku flies in sweeps Eri into his arms and fights Overhaul saving the day. Izuku proved, unknowingly, that the future Nighteye sees is not set in stone with his actions and on his death bed Nighteye acknowledges that without acknowledging it.

Nighteye’s treatment toward Izuku makes me uncomfortable. This is a man in a position of power over this student telling him that he is not enough, will never be enough, and that he is a disappointment.

His glorifying of All Might makes me uncomfortable. He was All Might’s partner and yet he practically had a shrine of the man in his office. He made him more than just a man, built him up as The Symbol of Peace and kept him there (as many of Toshi’s friends seem to do except for Nedzu and Naomasa) despite getting close enough trusted enough to learn about One For All. And despite all that “love” and “devotion” he left Toshinori alone to deal with his new normal of a permanently damaged system alone for years then takes out all that frustration and grief out on his friends chosen successor.

Then when all is said and done and he’s dying and he’s confronted by Toshinori and Izuku what happens? Does he apologize? Explain his actions? Get closure in his final moments?

No. Well, Toshinori got some measure of closure. Izuku got a few words that essentially boiled down to “Good job, your better than I thought.” without talking about the newfound hope Izuku’s action gave him that his visions are only possibilities not absolute. All of his attention then goes to his choice for One For All, Mirio. 

Understandably. 

He’s dying and Mirio was always his main priority as a mentor, and you know who Mirio looks like? All Might. He’s blonde, buff, blue-eyed, cheerfully friendly, and with a happy-go-lucky persona about him. Sir Nighteye taught him to smile. Chose him to be the new wielder of One For All and without telling him anything planned to introduce him to Toshinori to make his choice reality. Doesn’t that sound... I don’t know... uncomfortably close to manipulation? Grooming? To taking this child under his wing and molding him to be pretty close to a new version of All Might?

I don’t know. Maybe if Sir Nighteye had lived this uncomfortable impression I have of him would be lessened as he began to internalize the full extent of possibilities for the future that he never thought possible before and acted more hopeful, more willing to take gambles because his visions were no longer a guarantee of what will happen. 

#sorry for the rant #Naruto #mha #spoilers?

[a-marlene-s]

Futuristic Miraculous: Part 1

Couple: TerRI, Terry Mcginnis x Marinette Dupain-Cheng

Fandom: Miraculous Ladybug/Batman Beyond

Genre: Salt, hurt/comfort, friendship, and possibly more.

Summary: With her childhood friends close by, Marinette knew she could take on the world, even when dealing with a certain lair. It all first started with taking a job for being Jagged Stone’s personal designer and that resulted with her being in Neo-Gotham. All the while Terry is facing the fact he is the new Batman and dealing with all the past Robins wondering what Bruce was thinking in taking in a new kid into the cruel world that is of Superheroes.

Terry McGinnis x Marinette Dupain-Cheng: Futuristic            

Tag List: @battysorciere​

TerRi Sever: https://discord.gg/2qCNdjs

Age List: 

Bruce: 60

Dick: 43

Barbara: 42

Jason 39

Tim: 37

Damian: 34

Terry: 16

Marinette: 16

Penny R.: 32

Marinette refused to cry or look away as her classmates waiting to be picked up to go to the local airport. She could see many of them sneering, glaring or just giving her looks of pity. Then there was Lila… just giving a look that reminded Marinette of a cat that caught the canary.

At her right, Nino held back a snarl that threatened to escape his lips at the sight of Liar mocking his friend. At Marinette’s left, Kim is trying his hardest to hold back his own anger at what was happening. It’s completely unfair how things had turned out for Marinette. She had done everything she could for this trip to happen Neo-Gotham and for it to blow up in her face has become the last straw for her.

Marinette tried so hard to take the high road that the only thing she got out of it is broken friendships. Along with just seeing how depressing the world could be. It has been well over a year since Lila came to Paris and destroyed her life to the best of her abilities. Unfortunately for the Liar, Marinette has two best friends that managed to see through the lies and are now stand by her side through it all. Even going as far too foregoing Neo-Gotham for her.

With everyone’s back turn, Lila took the chance to send a menacing smirk to Marinette before boarding the bus with the rest of the class. Marinette’s eyes narrowed as everyone ignored them as the bus drove off, leaving them in its dust. This hurts.

Not as much as seeing the hurt in their faces when Lila’s reign over them comes tumbling down.

“Kim, Marinette, Nino, I have your work packets for the year.”  Ms. Mendeleiev approached the three students with three large packets of work. “I stapled my contact information in each packet. I will have the rest of your work on my website by the end of the month. The packets should be more than enough until then.”

“Thank you, Ms. Mendeleiev for your help.” Marinette thanked her instructor as she and her friends took their respective packets.

“If it means undermining, Miss Bustier, they by all means.” Ms. Mendeleiev snorted, she looked at her students, seeing the determination in their eyes. “If I was your homeroom instructor… things would have never gotten this far, I hope the three of you know this.”

“We know, Ms. Mendeleiev.” Marinette smiled sadly before she started to smirk. “I suppose we should be heading to the airport too if we want to catch our flight.”

“Penny said that a limo will be picking us up as soon as we give her a call.” Nino mentioned.

“Yeah, let’s call her! I want to see the looks on their faces when they see us flying first class!!!” Kim laughed.

Ms. Mendeleiev could only shake her head before she turned on her heal to leave. “Keep up with your work and keep me posted on your work.”

“Thank you, Ms. Mendeleiev.”  

-.-

Tim drank what feels like his hundredth cup of coffee in the past hour, it might as well be his hundredth cup of coffee at this point. He was supposed to be in Paris for just a simple and much needed vacation. But of course work has to come first before anything. This resulted with him waiting in the airport with a bunch of high school students that are to go back to Neo-Gotham with him as part of an exchange program set up by his associates and his old Alma mater.

Now… this wouldn’t be an issue. The actual issue being the fact that the one that did most of the work to make this program possible isn’t even here. Tim doesn’t buy that whole, ‘disciplinary actions’ and all that other crap the teacher tries to shove down his throat.  He ignored the rest of it and had emailed the associate that had put this together to send him the report from the missing student.

What Tim read made him wonder what the hell is going on in Paris. It makes it appear that they made the poor girl do all the dirty work and pushed her out of her own project at the last minute. As much he wants to forgo this trip, he has to keep up appearances as a CEO. Plus, who knows… maybe the kid will finally get a break from them.

Win-Win? No… it’s a lost for the girl that did everything she could to get her class to go on this trip. For nothing on her end.

“I happen to know Dick Grayson’s daughter, Mar’i Grayson! We are the closes of friends you know~”

Tim’s neck nearly snapped when he turned his attention to one of the French students. Once look over, and he could tell right off the bat she’s lying. First off… he knows all of Mar’i’s friends, safety precautions and to weed of anyone that wants to use her for connections. Second… this brat never spends a single day in the Manor and knew his own kids!!!! Tim guesses that the fact no one recognize him and assumed he’s some random employee that was supposed to be their guide or something.

Otherwise, the liar wouldn’t be spinning her tales otherwise.

“Why the hell are you here!!!”

Tim turned around to see three teens talking animated to a pink haired adult that is showing them a pamphlet. Considering they were all in the waiting terminal to catch the next plane, the four were blissfully unaware of their surroundings. That was until Miss Bustier approached the group but the woman that was holding the pamphlet pushed the teens behind her. Whatever was said by both adults, clearly made the teacher go on edge and the pink haired woman to smirk smugly at her.

With a heavy sigh, Tim drowned down his hundredth cup of coffee and headed towards what he suspects to be trouble.

“Marinette, Nino and Kim are under my supervision.” Penny stated, her expression neutral to hide her contempt. “I have their parents’ permission, the school is notified and that is all you need to know.”

Bustier’s mouth went agape at the woman’s words, even more so at the sight of her student’s smirks that were directed her way. Those three were supposed to be back at the school, not here in the airport. Not being here, waiting for the same plane as they are. She shook her head and tried to say something when it was announced that their flight is about ready to board, informing everyone to get to their spots.

“We must get going.” Penny said, pushing past Bustier and the rest of the students that decided to surround them. “We to get in line.”

Kim and Nino took hold of Marinette and pushed through the crowd as it appeared their fellow classmates were not planning on letting them through. The last thing they needed is more fuel to the fire by having Marinette being singled out for something she didn’t do. Again. Marinette for her own part, ignored the glares and everyone’s attempt to get her attention. As of now, they are not worth her time.

Marinette did however stick out her tongue out at Lila when she caught the other teen glaring at her. Might as well have some fun for now.

Tim, who had been watching, watched as the Marinette Dupain-Cheng be pulled away by her friends by her… friends? Classmates? Whatever she considers them, considering how majority of them were not comforting the now crying Liar. The Liar kept crying on and on how Marinette supposedly had stepped on her foot on purpose.

“Miss Bustier, is there a problem?” Tim asked, causing the French teacher to suck in a deep breath. Ah, she forgot about him. Figures. “Well?”

“Just a miscommunication is all.” Bustier tried to say.

“I assume that was Miss Dupain-Cheng?” Tim asked, raising an eyebrow at Bustier. “The one that is supposed to be dealing with disciplinary problems?”

“She chopped off Lila’s hair!” One of the teens seethed out as she tried to sooth the Lair’s tears away. “And she just stepped on her foot.”

Tim looked at Lila to see that her shoes were scruff free, her hair… well, it’s in a bob. He could only shake his head. Oh, how much he wants to cancel this trip. He’s close to doing it too. Taking in a deep breath, he looked back at Bustier. “Far as I am concerned, she is not part of this trip. You have no control over them. You, however, have control over the rest of your students. Now go get in line, we are about to board.”

-.-

Tim sat in his first class seat, asking the stewardess for a large cup of coffee. When he gets back home, he’s going to apologize to Bruce for all the shit he ever pulled on him throughout the years. This doesn’t include his own kids, but that is beside the point of it all. He had to deal with a bunch of whiny teens that are going on and on how the evil Marinette getting first class seats while they all have coach. Evil this, evil that, and here he was talking with said evil person, chatting away on her dream of becoming a fashion designer and how the Jagged Stone has hired her personally to design his clothes while he’s on tour.

It also helps that the woman from earlier, Penny Rolling is Jagged’s agent and confirmed her story. From what Tim could summarize what had happened was that Lila Rossi had cut her own hair to the point it was unsalvageable and blamed it on Marinette, claiming the designer did it. No one took Marinette’s side except for her two friends, Kim and Nino.

Despite the fact that Marinette was with Kim and Nino when this… accident had occurred, no one bothered to listen to reason. This caused Tim really regret not canceling the trip for the other Parisians. That was until Penny made mention that there was no point in going up against the girl… at that instant. If the girl wants a to be the center of attention, oh, she will get it.

Tim couldn’t help but laugh at the agent’s words before he quickly sobered up. Despite the fact Marinette and her friends are still going to Neo-Gotham, but they won’t have the same experience as the others… although, thinking further into it, it wouldn’t be all that great of a trip for them if Rossi keeps trying to sabotage them at every step.

At least they found a way to enjoy their time in the city…

“Excuse me, Mr. Drake…?”

Tim looked up at one of the stewardess to see her holding a note. “Is something the matter?”

“You have a message from one… Dick Grayson” The stewardess replied uncertainty, handing over the note to Tim.

Tim took the note and a raised eye brow. He watched as the stewardess scurry of before looking down at the note. Unfolding it to see what was written on it only caused both eyebrows to shot up.

Check the Neo-Gotham news!

Tim pulled out his cellphone and turned it back on. By the time his phone had booted up, he was bombarded by many missed texts, lost calls, and many news notifications all stemming from his home city. When he went to check on the latest text, he got another notification from a news station he follows.

Tapping on the notification and the headline of the article has him quickly making a group call with all the former batboys.

Tomorrow is Here, The Return of Batman!

“Okay, which one of you did it. Which one of you is the new Batman… What did you expect, Jason! I haven’t been in the same country, let alone continent… I don’t know, Damian! Bruce prefers to be alone and hardly bothers to talk to anyone outside of the family… Thanks Dick…  Let’s get this straight, whoever this new Batman is, is none of us… That’s what I thought.” Tim pulled his phone away from his ear as Dick, Jason and Damian started to argue among themselves on whatever is going on in Neo-Gotham. Apparently, there’s a new Batman and they have no clue who took on the old mantle of the Dark Night. Or as the Tomorrow Knight as people are taking to call him as now. Taking in a deep breath, Tim put the phone back by his ear. “I’m on a plan heading back home. I’ll talk to Bruce about this… What do you guys mean you won’t be here until then?… Just get here as soon as possible.”

-.-

Terry double checked that he has all of Bruce’s medications counted before placing them all in a small plant along with a sandwich and a steaming cup of tea. If he’s going to be dubbed Bruce Wayne’s part-time assistant, he might as well play the part. He has nothing against it, the old man is giving him the opportunity in becoming the new Batman. Plus, but the looks of it, there was really no one there to help Bruce as often as needed. Mainly making sure the guy doesn’t have a heart attack by doing the simplest of tasks… like saving him.

Terry shook his head as he picked up the tray and headed towards the room where Bruce is with Ace. Taking in a deep breath, he made his way to his new mentor.

Pushing the door open, Terry caught Bruce putting something away in his coat. He raised an eyebrow but made no comment. For all he knew it was other medication Bruce doesn’t want him to know about. “Remind me to go grocery shopping later. For a rich guy, your pantry is pretty bare.”

“Alfred used to keep the place stock…” Bruce briefly mentioned, reaching over to Ace to scratch his head. “Tim mainly just whatever he thinks is best for me…which isn’t much.”

“Tim?”

“One of my sons. You will be seeing him often as he pops by to make sure I’m properly taking care of myself.” Terry could hear the eye roll Bruce did at the mention of taking care of himself. “If you see a thirty something year old male that looks like he’s on the verge of collapsing… it’s him.”

“Is… is this the same man that took over Wayne Enterprises?” Terry enquired, placing the tray on a small table next to Bruce’s chair.

“He is. Out of my four sons, he took the most interest in taking over the company.”

“Got it.” Terry grumbled, taking a seat opposite of Bruce. He watched as the older male take his sandwich and eat it uninterestingly. A thought popped through his head suddenly, causing him to tense. “All your sons were past Robins and the occasional Batman… right?”

Bruce eyed Terry suspiciously before nodding, taking another bite from his food. “Your point?”

“Did you tell any of them about me?” Terry asked.

“I did not. I wouldn’t be surprised if one of them barges through that door… right about now.”

Slam!

The doors of the room slammed open to reveal a very sleep deprived male, frantically looking around for who knows what. When his eyes landed on Terry, his slowly blinked over to Bruce and back at Terry before leaving the room. An awkward silence filled the air when the sound of the front door being slammed open and shut.

Terry looked over at Bruce just to see the man still munching on his sandwich. “Who was that?”

“That would be Tim.” Bruce said without missing a beat.

Terry looked taken aback at that statement. The same guy that’s supposed to look after Bruce, the same guy that looks like he’s going to keel over? Yeah, no. Tim looks like he hasn’t slept in months and is need of a proper meal. “…And he now the head of Wayne Enterprise?”

“I’m one of the chairmen.” Bruce stated.

The sound of the front door being slammed open reverberated throughout the seemingly quiet manor. Stomping all the way to the room Terry and Bruce are in. Tim came back, staring at Terry with a wide variety of emotions. “Who are you? Did Bruce adopt you? What’s your backstory? What’s your name…?”

Terry looked taken aback, he looked over at Bruce, hoping for some sort of help. Nope. The old man just took his medication and used his tea to drink it down. “…”

“Well?” Tim questioned, storming into the room. He now stood in between Bruce and Terry, waiting for the teen to answer his questions. “Who are you?”

“His father used to work for Wayne Enterprises.” Bruce butted in, emphasizing on a particular word.  

This only caused Tim to raise his hands into the air in defeat as he caught drift on Bruce’s meaning of the words, used to. “Great…. He did take in another one… If you’ll excuse me, I need to talk to my brothers.”

With that, Tim one again left the room leaving being a very perplexed Terry and annoyed Bruce.

“What the hell was that?” Terry questioned.

“…He gets like that whenever he’s off his coffee.”

-.-

Marinette, Nino and Kim did their best to ignore how Neo-Gotham gave them the creeps. It was clear the city needed massive cleaning up when it comes to crime. From what they had gathered, things had deteriorated since Batman had hung his cape for good. Shortly being followed by his former sidekicks. Since then, crime has risen to the point it makes them wonder if the city will ever be crime-free.

Maybe they’ll help while they are in the city for the time being.

“Spots On!”

“Shell On!”

“Show Time!”

-.-

Tim sat in front of the computer mainframe inside the Batcave, on a multi-line video chat with Dick, Barbara, Jason and Damian. “You know him, Barbs?”

“Terrence ‘Terry’ McGinnis has multiple run ins with the GCPD. Even serving a three-month stint in juvie for running with a street gang.” Commissioner Barbara Gordon said, her expression stern and not at all liking the fact that Bruce had managed to find someone to take over the mantle of Batman.

Jason whistled at that. “Damn. What this kids’ home life like?”

“His father was murdered the other night… in order to keep him quiet.” Barbara said, her eyes narrowed down onto Tim. For his own part, Tim wanted to earth to swallow him up. “Something about one of your business partners, by the name of Derek Powers, was creating a formula and one Warren McGinnis was a part of the research division of it.”

Once more, Tim slumped further into his chair as he thought over the business deal he had with Derek Powers. It was nothing out of the ordinary really. They both had something the other needed, and Powers just wanted to use the Wayne’s Labs for further research on a formula. Nothing out of the norm really! This has been done multiple times with different companies in the past. But it appears this time around… it was anything but the norm.

“Powers had Warren killed. Terry found out, and wanted payback. What’s new?” Damian rolled his eyes not at all amused by the entire situation. “I just want to know how he managed to get the suit.”

“Bruce is refusing to tell me anything and all of you know how he is.” Tim said, fixing himself back into the seat before he had the chance to fall off it.

“Does he gave a family?” Dick asked quietly, almost being talked over by Jason demanding Tim to demand for more answers.

Once again, Barbara answered. “He’s now living with his mother and had a younger brother.”

“Do they get along?” Jason asked.

“They do. More so after Terry’s return from juvie.”

“You know something…” Jason mused, he wasn’t facing the screen anymore, paying more attention to whatever was on his phone. “If I didn’t know any better…”

“Which you don’t.” Damian butted in.

“Shut it squirt!” Jason shot back.

“I’m not a child anymore, Todd!”

“That’s enough!” Dick said, breaking up a possible fight. “No more fighting. We’re not children anymore.”

Jason tsk’ed but continued with his train of thought. “The kid looks a lot like Damian when he was around that age.”

At this, everyone turned their attention to Damian who’s eyes nearly popped out of his head, nearly choking on a beverage he was drinking. “Let me assure you, I am not like father who sleeps with random women.”

“…You got to admit… Terry has Bruce’s chin…” Dick pointed out.

Silence…

“Who wants to bet Bruce didn’t wear a condom?”

A sharp ring interrupted any possible bets, Tim reached up and started to figure out what set off the alarm. Pulling up a screen that showed something… really, really… really odd. “So… a ladybug, a turtle and a monkey walked into a movie theater that’s being held up in gun point…”

TBC.

If anyone wants to be part of the tag list, don’t hesitate to ask

#TerRi #Terry x Marinettte #terry mcginnis #marinette dupen chang #ml #batman beyond #dc #crossover #batman #ladybug #miiraculous laadybug #maribat #Part 1

[crusty]

I know there's not much I can do to fix the fandoms I'm in, but airing out my issues with it currently usually helps. I know I've been all over the place the past couple years and I've said some dumb shit, but I've been trying my best to make some real changes in how I think fandom should be. Now, when I'm at fault I apologize. It's more honorable to apologize when you've wronged someone than to be prideful and continue to spout shit outta your mouth like a leaky, rotten faucet.

I know sometimes my image can be misconstrued, and people might just see me as just a loud rude asshole, but in actuality... I'm a loud rude asshole who still cares a LOT about his friends, mutuals, and the kids/teens in the fandom that get kicked around by all the dickbags who think they're tough shit.

A lot of discourse happening nowadays is trying to split everyone up, even if we all have many things in common. The internet is a LOT bigger than it was in the past, and a lot of adults on here ain't too keen on sharing it. They'll blame the kids and their parents for shit instead of being a responsible adult and just being respectful.

Minors in fandom learn from us. If anything I want my page and my content to be open to people 13+.

All of my adult content I usually never post now because either it's not allowed on the site, or I post it under some other name. You know, like a responsible adult should do.

As for fandom drama, stay out of it if it isn't your business. If it BECOMES your business, talk to someone you trust about it. As the internet becomes more hostile, sometimes it's hard to know who's really your friend and who's... Not. We shouldn't be scared to stand up for others, and if you're the type of person to let your friend be harassed by some fuckwad with like 6k followers, then you suck too for not sticking up for them.

The internet shouldn't be like you're in middle school, or high school, with petty locker room drama. Utilize your tools. Block. Mute. Take note of toxic users who do nothing but bring you down and block them. Block their friends too if you have to. People with similar views stick together.

Breaking away from the status quo is. Difficult. It can be really hard to lose mutuals and friends who turned out not to like you as much because you don't have a big following, or a loud enough voice. But once you do break away, you'll meet others who did the same. Those people are your real friends.

TLDR; My main rules for the internet and being in fandom are as follows:

1. Be respectful of others' boundaries. Do this in multiple ways; adults, respect young users who arnt comfy with adults. Respect young users who are, and set necessary boundaries between yourselves. Be a good role model.

Kids, respect adults being adults in their spaces, you'll get there someday too. Also kids, watch over your friends. Make sure they're not straying away too far where they shouldn't.

2. Respect others' opinions. Harmless opinions of course, like if someone hates your fav, who cares! Its fiction, they're not killing you. Ships don't really matter in real life. Learn to step away from the internet if its stressing you out. Agree to disagree. You can be friends and not like the same things! It's called not being a jerkass!

3. BLOCK BLOCK BLOCK! Use your block/mute/kick etc features to curate your feed to your liking. Someone pissing you off with their constant negativity ? You can try talking to them, but you arnt obligated to. Block them! Boom. You feel so much better. Mute and block words related to things you dislike,hate,squick or trigger you. Feels good too. See someone being suspicious or creepy? Block them. Tell your friends.

4. Have fun. Just be yourself! Cringe culture is bullshit, so do what makes you happy. You'll find friends and good times. Ignore anon hate, delete it! I wish I did LOL

Anyways, that's it for now. I had a lot on my mind, and needed to get this out. If this helps you? GOOD. If you're troubled and need to talk to someone, send me a dm. I've dealt with plenty of childhood bullying, adult bullying, and online harassment. From someone who gets it, I'll help as much as I can. Thanks.

#crustybabbles #long post #thoughts

[writeouttaluck]

This is a quickie. Partially inspired by my childhood and teen years.

Both Elementary and Middle school had hammered home the idea that people are shitty and that they will fuck you up at any given chance in any way they think of. I started spending more time by myself and away from people. The only time I ever left was to hang out with friends and even that seemed to be falling apart for me. It was rough, really. Ive known my friends were shitty for a while, but its what i got. Everybody else is either too stupid or weird for me to fit into. Not to mention the assholes.

Everyone in my class was a fucking asshole and they could suck a fucking dick if they thought i was about to drop years of resentment and turn the other cheek.

Fuck that.

Ill stick with the criminals. At least they can be fun.

After my first day of 7th grade, I felt about 3 feet tall and twice as exhausted. I had an inkling that it was depression. I did some looking online and thats what matched how i feel. Tired, lack of motivation, easilly upset by everything. It felt like i was loosing my edge and i cant say im too happy about that.

At the same time, it seemed that as one fire was being put out, another was being discovered. Something felt wrong. I was still angry as ever but it was different. I was more angry at the world than i was angry at a particular thing.

I was slowly realizing that things just arent gonna get better and if they do, it wont be for a long, long time. I was pretty much destined to do nothing with my life considering i wasnt smart enough to carry myself education wise. Ive needed help with a lot of things for as long as I remember.

It felt unfair. I was supposed to be such a smart person, right? Yeah what a crock of shit. It seems that adults have been lying to me about far more than just santa claus and the tooth fairy.

And right now I really felt like knocking someones teeth out of their head.

Like the universe had read my fucking mind, I heard a few pebbles get tossed at my window.

I got out of my chair and peered behind me. Out the window stood Dylan. He cupped his hands and shouted.

“Lets fucking go!”

I nodded and slid the bandana up my face. I grabbed my leather vest and walked out of my room, making sure to close the door behind me as quietly as possible. My mom was passed out on the couch again with the dogs laying beside her. I stared for a moment, watching her breathe heavilly in her unconscious state before i decided it was safe to sneak away. I practically slithered to the door before taking one more look back.

Mom layed facing the tv and away from me. I knew the dogs were gonna go apeshit as soon as the door opened and so i prepared myself.

Then like ripping off a band aid, I swung the front door open and hopped outside, swinging it shut behind me. They started barking like crazy as I thought they would and so I stepped down the stairs on my porch real fast and ran around to my backyard where Dylan was waiting.

“What took you so long?” he said to me as I caught up with him.

I didnt answer, deciding that answering him was just a waste of time.

We walked through our backyard and through the tall grass of the house that lived behind us. It happened to be on the market for years now and didnt seem to be selling anytime soon. That made it a great place to break into and hang out. It was a regular thing at this point. Although since the yard was so open and surrounded by other houses, we kept the hanging in there to a minimum.

“Dude, this fucking kid has been talking some mad shit about me recently.” Dylan started in, “Hes been talking to my girlfriend and saying some really fucked up shit to her. Saying what he wants to do to her and all this shit and I swear if I get my fucking hands on him…”

He spoke with gnashed teeth and a vein fit to burst from his neck. He said all this while looking at his phone screen. I could only assume he was looking at this guys facebook profile.

All at once Dylan turned back to me and showed me the phone screen.

“This fucking faggot. Im gonna fucking kill him!”

I looked at the photo and quickly recognized his name. That was the guy my girlfriend cheated on me with. I could feel my blood draw to a boil as i stared at him. I balled my fists at my side white knuckle tight. Each digit made an audible popping sound as they rolled up.

“You know this kid?” Dylan asked me.

I looked away from the phone and to dylan and nodded my head.

He nodded back at me in understanding and we both had the same idea in mind.

“Lets find this motherfucker”

…

After some talking and walking and all kinds of looking, we figured the easiest way to get this fucker out of his safe space was to have Dylans girlfriend bait him into coming to a secure location. We decided that under the bridge in town was a pretty good place considering that not many people know how to get to the path down under. We headed there and waited for the little bastard.

After a while of sitting around, it was about 9:00. The sun had gone completely down at this point and it was dark. There wasnt any foot traffic above for nearly an hour until we heard a bicycle rattle its way over the wooden slats. I nodded at Dylan and he ran over to the bushes to go hide while I stayed in the the open. I leaned on one of the concrete beams and crossed my arms.

This was going to be interesting.

“Bella! Psst, Bella!” I heard him whispering as he walked down the little hill. He waded past some real tall grass and walked out onto the smooth surface before he noticed me standing there.

“Uh...hi?” He asked, looking at me.

I stared at him and waited.

I watched as Dylan stood from the grass behind him and bolted in the guys direction. Dylan decked him from behind in the back of the head and he stumbled foreward, falling on his hands.

That was my cue.

I walked over and pulled him up to standing level. He had his eyes squinted shut and teeth together. That punch definatly hurt.

Not taking time to hesitate, I held him infront of me with my hand around his mouth and holding his right arm behind his back.

“So, you think youre hot shit, huh?” Dylan said standing over him.

He drove a fist into the guys gut and I struggled to hold him as he doubled over in pain. I snapped him back into place as dylan got into his fighting stance. He stepped over and punched him across the face hard. It was the kind of hit that would leave a bruise the size of an apple. I felt the guy breathe heavier, and tears hit my hand that was still clamped over his mouth.

Dylan reared back again and swung, hitting him right in the teeth. The guys head rolled back a bit at the force of the hit. Im suprised that didnt knock him out.

Than dylan got a start and drove his foot square into his gut. The guy moaned in pain under my hand.

Then the guy did something balsy. He bit right down into my hand, hard. My instant reaction was to let go of his mouth and suddenly he pulled his arm away too. He tried making a dash for it but my anger had flared at the pain. I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and yanked him back hard into the rocks and gravel at my feet. He flew into the rocks face first and tried getting back up. I grabbed his belt and tossed him again, swinging his face into the rocks once more. At this, I didnt wait to see if he was gonna get up again. As soon as his head was raised, I crouched to his level and put my hand on the back of his head, slamming his face into the sharp rocks again. He yelped a bit in pain so I flipped him over and clamped my left hand around his throat. I squeezed like I meant it and closed off his wind pipe. He looked up at me in pity as he choked. I picked him up off the ground a bit and slammed him back down. I brought my right up like a big ass flesh hammer and brought down hard on his face. I raised it again and smashed him in the face again.

Once I saw the color start to drain from his face, I let go of his throat. He coughed and gasped for breath he desperately needed. I saw something move quickly out of the corner of my eye and brought my arm up to sheild my face. Dylan pelted a handful of sharp rocks at the guys face before following it up with another hard punch. Once I knew dylan had this, I stood up and brushed myself off.

Dylan crouched to his level and looked him in the eyes. Than he did something that actually shocked me. He produced a knife from his pocket and flipped it open real fast in front of the kids face.

Holy shit, was he actually going to kill him?

Dylan brought the knife up and dragged the dull side of the blade down the guys face, who now was so terrifyed that he had full on tears streaming down.

Right as I imagined dylan jabbing the knife through his eye, He stopped just short and whispered real low.

“You come near my girl again or If I hear you talking shit about me around down, Im gonna come to your house and kill you and your whole familly. Do you fucking understand?”

The guy just looked at him in fear.

“DO YOU FUCKING UNDERSTAND?!?!” He shouted in the guys face.

He quickly nodded out of fear.

Than Dylan clamped his hand on the guys face and shoved him back to the ground.

I got up as did dylan and we both started walking back to the top of the bridge. Once we got up there, we saw the guys bike parked next to the bench without a lock. So Dylan kicked the peg up and started walking it over the bridge.

At first I thought maybe Dylan was gonna steal this guys bike but that didnt seem like something he would do. Then we got to the mid point in the bridge and he stopped walking. I stopped too. He suddenly grabbed the bike by the middle and flung the whole damn thing over the edge like a big ass frisbee.

It dropped for a second before we heard it smash into the water below.

“That will teach that fucker…” Dylan said.

…

#fighting #taking care of buisness #anger #anger issues #angst #teen angst #threats #gang #gang violence #story #writing

[kimmibers]

Pirate Gold (AU) - chapter 1

Hi so this is for SasuHina revolution week I've decided as my fanfics are always too long to just do one prompt a day so I'm just gonna concentrate on this one and upload a chapter every day (If I'm able to with work). I've been working a lot on my writing recently and hope this story shows improvement compared to previous uploads. So I hope you like it :) pls leave notes/review

LONG LIVE SASUHINA :D

Kim xxx

Lady Hinata awoke from her dreams, just like any normal day. Today was no ordinary day, it being her 18th birthday.

Throughout childhood, her father Hiashi Hyuga and herself had been at logger heads many times. Her safety paramount, as she grew in to a teen her father's will had felt overwhelmingly claustrophobic.

If her mother were alive, Hinata believed her confined childhood would never have come about. She had been told by the servants that her mother had dies in an accident when Hinata was 4 years old. Hinata remembered very little of her mother, loosing her at such a young age, she did however retain the memories of her mother's stories. Every night Hinata would beg and harass her mother for said stories and each night her mother complied. Her stories created enchanting dreams that would be filled with far off lands, maundering pirates and adventures most magical.

The Hyuga mansion stood tall and proud, sat on a cliff looking over the village and beach below. Konoha was just like any other port village; its docks welcoming ships with their hulls laden with cargo. From the beach a simple path lead up to the village a tavern open greeting sailors and regulars bringing talk of their time on sea. The market, busy with gossip, always filled with wares from all the 7 seas.

As a child Hinata would sneak from her father's side and escape down to the docks, drawn by the siren call of the sea. With her over protective father she had never had the opportunity to sail as the song enticed, and with every failed attempt Hinata had grown into despair and eventually gave up.

Once dressed for the day ahead Hinata made her way to the dining room, where her father sat patiently at the table.

"My beautiful girl," Hiashi stood at her entrance, "Happy birthday my moon child." He called her her childhood nickname given to her as she was born under a full moon.

"father." Hinata smiled sweetly and allowed her father to give her a hug. Once

sat down Hinata noticed a small red box to one side of her father.

"Before I give you this," Hiashi caught her glance at the box, "There is something you must know." As he spoke he gripped the red box with its perfectly wrapped bow. "But I'm afraid of your reaction."

"Father?" Hinata questioned, "I'm not use to seeing you like this."

"What I'm about to say relates to your mother," At the mention of her Hinata's attention could be drawn no where else. "Your mother, God rest her soul, was no ordinary woman. You remind me so much of her." He added. Hinata knew she held much of a resemblance to her mother, it had been a rather sore point growing up between her father and herself in the early years after her death. Hinata held Hiashi's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

"It's been 14 years since her death and everything you've been told is wrong. My dear moon child, this going to come as quite a shock but keep in mind I didn't tell you for your own good."

"It's ok father, I understand my safety was always and will always be your concern."

"Thank you moon child," Hiashi gave her a small smile, "On your 4th birthday the 3 of us wanted to have are own private party on our vessel. Your dear loved the sea, almost as much as you," Hiashi smiled in recollection, "Her own father was on his way to visit you, he hadn't had the opportunity to meet you yet and we were all so looking forward to our family being back together." Hiashi's face darkened so Hinata gave his hand another squeeze. "Before his imminent arrival our ship was spotted by 'the death ship'. My dear child you've never seen such a ship in your life, its was black as the plague the black sails seemed to eat up the skies and all happiness you've ever felt seems to sucked out of you. All you feel is your death coming straight towards you. The crew of the 'death ship' are lead by no other than Captain Madara, I've heard it said that the last thing you see before your death is yourself reflected in his eyes." Hinata gasped at the name, the whole world knew of Captain Madara. He was the most ruthless pirate of all and would even kill other pirates, a heresy against the pirate code, doing this to only improve his power. But Hinata had thought him to be only a folks tale, she only knew of him from her mother's stories.

"He is the most evil of pirates," Hiashi continued, "With only the 3 of us on board we were grossly outnumbered. Your mother urged me to keep you safe and to hide you from Madara. We knew he was there for her, he'd been chasing your mother all there adult lives-"

"Why?" Hinata interrupted.

"When they were children they were promised to one another, an arranged marriage. But your mother heard of his murderous ways and would have nothing to do with marrying such a man. She ran away in the hopes of escaping him and for a while it worked. Our biggest fear had come true, Madara had found her, but he knew nothing of you. While I hid in the hold with you – the biggest shame in my life – you mother fought with Madara. I took a peak through the metal crate, your mother was an excellent swords woman, she had met her match with captain Madara though, you've never seen 2 blades dance like that. Your mother fought with all her might, but ultimately the duel would take her life." Hiashi paused, his voice breaking, "Madara left her on the deck to bleed, she knew she didn't have long – Her dying wish – Was I keep you safe – And on your 18th birthday, you have this." Hiashi slid the red box towards her.

Hinata looked from the box then to her father with tears gliding down her face. Hinata's chair screeched with her sudden movement.

"Papa," She hugged him from behind and gave his own tear stained cheek a peck, "You kept her promise, I am safe." She assured him.

"Thank you, moon child." Hiashi patted her arm. He handed her the box and gestured her to sit once more, Hinata obliged.

"This was your mother's most prised possession, other than you," Hiashi informed her. As he spoke Hinata began to carefully open the ribbon, "For generations it has been handed down, a symbol of her families lineage, and now to you."

Hinata lifted the lid on the box with bated breath.

"A gold coin?" She looked to her father in confusion.

"Not everything is as simple as it seems."

Hinata lifted the box to inspect the coin closer. The coin looked to be made of solid gold and was covered in a tribal like pattern. Hinata picked up the coin from it's box and turned it over to inspect the other side. The moment the coin now 'heads up' Hinata felt powerful jolt emitting from her hand, the sound of her heart beat sent ripples from the coin that echoed all around Konoha cove.

"Drop it!" Hiashi shouted his voice shaking. With shaking fingers Hinata quickly placed the coin back in it's box.

"What is it?" She asked.

"Quick we must pack," Hiashi stood from his chair, "We don't have time. Pack only essentials, we leave by night fall. There is much to prepare." That said Hiashi left the room.

"What in the world just happened?" Hinata asked herself. She looked down at the coin. The skull and crossbones even with no eyes seemingly looking at her and laughing.

"What are you?"

Hinata sank in to the couch, with a bag of her clothes and personal effects at her side. What a miserable birthday, she thought to herself. She'd seen nothing of her father. Since morning he's been locked away in his study while the servants buzzed a hive of activity packing the houses belongings, most for transport some for market.

Hinata still had no clue what was happening. The gold coin, still in it's box, had been taken from her by 1 of the servants, claiming her father needed it. The day had been none stop, a chaotic hurricane of packing and emotions.

The weather had shifted from the beautiful sunny morning to the dark clouds heavy with storms.

Hinata watched through the window as the clouds drew closer turning midday in to twilight. If she hadn't been observing the horizon she might have missed the moment a black top sail broke the horizon. Hinata had never seen the ship before but something about it exuded animal menace, causing goosebumps to appear on her arms. Winks of muzzle-flash glittered the horizon and the muffled booms of cannon came a second later. A split second later and another top sail, this time red, peaked over the horizon.

"Shit!" Hiashi hastily entered the room, "They're here. We must go now." Hiashi grabbed Hinata's hand pulling her away from the window.

"No!" Hinata shouted authoritatively, "What is happening? You can't just keep hiding things from me."

"Please Hinata, now is not the time to be fucking awkward." At such rare language used from her father Hinata fell silent. "I'm sorry my moon child," He bowed his head, "I know you have questions, when we have time I shall answer them." Hinata nodded her head, the fight in her silenced not wanting to add to his stress. "What I'm about to tell you, you won't like, but hear my words well and do not disobey. You are to flee from here, use the passage ways from the mansion and hide at the rocks below. Hide there until I find you -"

"But -"

"Shush Hinata, you must do as I ask, your safety is of up most importance. You have to survive." He urged, "If for some reason you are captured by 1 of these ships use the word 'Parley' and do not tell anyone your name," Next he showed her a plain cheap looking gold locket. "Inside here is the coin. Whatever you do do not the coin again. Keep it hidden, keep it safe." He implored.

By now the 2 ships had come closer to their cove and with them Hiashi's mood sombre.

"Why do I get the feeling you're saying goodbye?" Hinata asked.

Hiashi said nothing in return, tentatively he placed the locket around her neck. He had tears in his eyes refusing to let them fall.

"You must go."

Hinata fled, just as her father instructed. She hid at the base of the cliffs a finger tip from the sea crashing against the rocks. Even that sound couldn't conceal the screams of lives being lost. The cannons from the ships taking over her once peaceful cove.

She watched, silently crying, as the black ship took aimed it's cannons and with there full force reduced her home and childhood memories to a pile of rubble.

What felt like hours later the black ominous ship sailed by her under the cover of darkness. Hinata could only see it as it floated by unbelievably close. Coming from it the noise of celebration, their job complete.

The cove now echoed with the wale's of newly made widows and orphans. The sea stained red as the bodies of the nameless bobbed in the currant and washed up on the shore.

"Who are you?" A male's voice bellowed as he pointed his piston towards her.

"P-Parley." She stammered.

"What did she say?" Another male's voice asked the first male.

"She said parley-"

"- Or what!? Can't we just pretend she never said anything?"

"We can't," The first male lowered his weapon, distracted by his companion, "If the cap'in found out we didn't follow the code he'd..." with a finger the man traced a line across his neck.

"You have no idea what you're getting yourself in for, girl." The second man spoke, "Now get up and come with us!"

#sasuhina #sasuke x hinata #sasuhina fanfic #sasuhina fanfiction #sasuhinarv18 #pirate #pirate gold chapter 1 #SasuHina Revolution 2K18

[dylovvrs]

5 November, 2021

I’m turning 16 in three days which is honestly weird to think about. First of all, it feels like I’ve been 15 for literally the longest time. And turning 16 is a big jump for me and most people. It’s legit the age that I used to make up when asked about my age when I was a kid. I’m growing older and older and taking bigger steps toward becoming an adult and soon providing for myself, a step closer to having to learn about this world by myself. It feels so surreal and weird— the fact that our childhood and teen years take up a very, very small part of our life is weird. Because it feels like being a kid, a scholar and attending school is life. And it won’t ever change from that. But here I am, almost 16 and growing older each year until that will happen.

It’s also November now, meaning winter is really close. Personally, winter is the worst season of all. Yes, the first snowfall is really pretty, and I love the feeling of Christmas being around the corner and enjoying life by searching for presents for my loved ones. I love every aspect of winter; that is, until New Years is over.

I’ve always whined about living in a cold state because our winters really do suck. Winters are not only cold, but it’s constantly gloomy and dark. We wake up to darkness, go to school freezing, leave school freezing, then it gets dark again. Winters are also seemingly the hardest times for me for school, too, as I find myself not ever getting enough sleep because of my work load, and all the winter provides me is literally darkness. I could tell this works the same for many people, because no one rarely wants to hang out in the winter. It’s school work and darkness that occupies my life. Nothing just seems to be fun and my motivation for things really do plummet. Nothing is happening during winter other than being stressed to be honest. There are no tours being held by anyone (that I like, at least) and even things like comebacks rarely happen.

Even though winters truly suck, I’m actually glad I get to witness these four or so months of nothingness.

Because, once the cold passes and the snow melts; and the sun starts rising again; and the sun stays up longer; it’s truly the happiest times of my life.

Having winter makes having spring so much better. Spring is my favorite season not only because it gets warmer and school is almost out, but because it symbolizes so much to me. It symbolizes happiness for me— symbolizes that all the hard things I went through was worth withstanding, because now spring is here and things will be so much better.

I’m not sure what about spring speaks so happy to me. I didn’t start growing my love for spring until I was in seventh grade. In that previous winter, I was going through some hard times. I started losing some friends and not many people talked to me anymore. I felt kind of lonely and I kind of grew a lot quieter during that winter. But, once spring came, I’ll literally never forget how I felt during that time. First of all, I was able to witness my first BTS comeback that spring with Boy with Luv. Just thinking back onto that whole era, and how I stayed on top of every release following up to the actual album, still makes me smile to this day. Following the comeback, I got tickets to their Speak Yourself concert in Chicago— in which I got to witness them in person and the city of Chicago. Their concert to this day is one of the best days, if not the best, day of my life.

So, as winter begins making its appearance, I might shed a few tears. I might be stuck in my room studying for that test all night. I might feel a little lonely, might be confused as where and what I am doing in life.

But it’s so worth the relief and happiness that comes in spring.

Thank you winter, honestly, for making me a stronger person.

[tracejade96]

God gave me so much ... and I am assuming so that I can help other people who have gone through the same thing since I came out of the storm damaged but stronger.

God gave me childhood issues so I can understand and help other children who went through some of the same things. Substance abuse issues in the home, loud fighting, verbal sometimes turned physical abuse, an absent biological father replaced with a great man/step dad yet I still had abandonment issues wondering how someone could walk away from a child they made. And many more..

God gave me a son at 18 because he knew I would be the best mom at 18, better thsb Id ever be at 30 or 40... he had other things planned for me. Knew wed kinda grow up together and knew that was best for us both.

God gave me the ability to see continuing to go back to the cheating abusive ex was going to get me no where and helped clear an exit plan that led me to meet lots of interesting people in my life. Help a family who needed me , and eventually return to my home town and start my life over with my toddler, the love of my life, my little man in tow. My son is my biggest blessing, the biggest heart you'll ever meet that was raised by me alone for a while then with the influence of his step dad he learned sometimes you need to not have suck a big heart, but we both know its just a cover because pain in that big heart of his hurts so bad putting up a wall is easier.

God gave me his step dad to show me how a real man takes care of his family, and also to teach me that "taking care" of your family isn't always enough. You need to love them unconditionally and tell them so. Taught me arguing is worthless because no one ever wins. Taught me crying is weak. Taught me I was so imperfect I wasn't worthy of having kids with his perfect self. Taught me that being me was wrong, and that I needed to always act like an adult and not embarrass him. Taught me that putting holes in the walls is ok, but only him, no one else could. Taught me nothing is more important than money, especially happiness. So much more I just don't feel like talking about anymore.

God gave me the man I am engaged to now to teach me that love is unconditional after all, . ...what being taken care of really means, and all that stuff my ex taught me can be healed with time and isn't true at all.

God took my mother when I was 29 sco I could understand and help others in my life who will inevitably lose parents in my lifetime. ...then all 4 of my grandparents, a bunny, dogs, great old friends, a few new freinds around my age... all lost within the next 10 years. Left me with a deep overflowing hole which manifested itself into fibromyalgia and PTSD.

God gave me endometriosis so I could understand, sympathize with and educate other women with the same condition.

God gave me fibromyalgia, PTSD, chronic pain, adrenal fatigue, chronic fatigue, anxiety, depression, etc... so I could get through them and come out stronger... still working on it.

God gave me teens in my life who had an alcoholic mom just like I did because he knew Id understand them and give them a safe place to land when they needed it, and I will forever be their momma and I am so proud of that. I just wish I had been able to help thier moms before it was too late.

God made me a stress junk eater so I could get fat and unhealthy and eventually learn about food and start trying to eat what my body needs instead of what my mind thinks it wants and to stick to an exercise plan.

God made me hypermobile (Ehlers Danlos Syndrome) and all the pain and aggravation that comes with it so I can again understand, sympathize with, educate and help others with the same issue.

God made me break my leg so I would know what extreme pain felt like. ...so i know my daily pain may be terrible, its nothing in comparison, and the inconvenience of a broken leg is wayyyyy worse than the inconvenience of chronic pain so when I heal I can do more with my life, ...not let the pain stop me so much, and educate others how to do the same. Maybe also so Id learn to slow down, and start meditating, who knows this broken leg may change my life. Im still sticking with my exercise, even if it is just moving enough to get the blood flowing and maintain some muscle tone.

There's so much more but im exhausted, so Ill continue tomorrow. I offer you to ask me anything. I've been through so much in my life. A lot worse that I didn't list and some not so bad, I can give advice on almost any subject. Feel free to ask. I love to give advice. The empath in me who is also slightly able to talk to loved ones past, usually has some good advice, sometimes with not sure if its me or your loved one giving the advice, because I'm completely new to that gift, but good advice usually. (Can't promise always). Goodnight!!

#fibromyalgia #ehlers danlos syndrome #obesity #ddpy #abuse #childhood #alcohlism #drugs #love #narcism #broken #verbal abuse #physical abuse #physical health #positive mental attitude #mental health #mental disorder #fight depression with exercise #depression #anxiety #fibrowarrior #fibrofighter #endometriosis #parents fighting #broken fibula #heartbreak #not enough #chronicbadass

[danithebookaholic-blog]

REVIEW! - YOUNG ADULT BOOKS

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

After last week’s Teen Romance Reviews, I kind of got sucked into the Young Adult genre — and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that!

So this week I have some more teen stories, and while not all of them are classified as “romances,” they all do have a little bit of teenage love in the air, on the field, and under the water. 😉

This week’s reviews are of: 📚Gaby Dunn & Allison Raskin’s I Hate Everyone But You (2017 YA LGBT) 📚Vicky Skinner’s How to Breathe Underwater (2018 YA Romance) 📚Alice Kuipers’ Me & Me (2018 YA Contemporary Fiction) 📚Shannon Klare’s Surviving Adam Meade (2018 YA Sports Romance)

From one bookaholic to another, I hope I’ve helped you find your next fix. —Dani

I Hate Everyone But You (I Hate Everyone But You #1) 

By Gaby Dunn & Allison Raskin

Publication Date: September 5, 2017 Genre: Young Adult, Contemporary Fiction, LGBT

Synopsis:

Dear Best Friend, I can already tell that I will hate everyone but you. Sincerely,  Ava Helmer (that brunette who won’t leave you alone)

We're still in the same room, you weirdo. Stop crying. G

So begins a series of texts and emails sent between two best friends, Ava and Gen, as they head off to their first semesters of college on opposite sides of the country. From first loves to weird roommates, heartbreak, self-discovery, coming out and mental health, the two of them document every wild and awkward moment to each other. But as each changes and grows into her new life, will their friendship be able to survive the distance?

Purchase:

Amazon / B&N / Kobo / Google Play / IndieBound

Review:

 I Hate Everyone But You (IHEBY) gave me so many different feels!

I felt incredibly close to Ava. She and I could almost be the same person.

I had a difficult time reading IHEBY though due to being so old - apparently - that I just flat out don’t understand “text speak.” Give me an “LOL” or even a “ROFL” and I gotcha, much more than that and I look like a grandma with grey hair and no teeth. The following is a Tweet I sent within the first 50 pages:

Must be incredibly old because I'm having to look up every other line. Someone please get me an internetslang dictionary, STAT!@JBUshow #itwonthurtmyreview #Promise #ihateeveryonebutyou #notasyoungasilook #butimonly32 #currentlyreading #Old #slangdictionaryneeded pic.twitter.com/WxK8R1eoJH

— Dani Winland 🍷🏋️‍♀️ 📚 (@DaniWinland) February 6, 2019

Usually this style of writing - Texts and emails only - drives me crazy! I have a really difficult time reading this style when it comes to a book (real life, that’s another story!) So when I began this book I thought to myself Oh no! How on earth am I going to read this?! Did I not realize this was how the book was written before I picked it up?! Am I going to be able to get through this, or am I just wasting my time? Well, it turns out that once I got over the initial shock of the style and was 30 pages in, I realized that I didn’t even realize that it was written in this style. So, if you’re like me and this kind of writing style drives you crazy, give it a chance - or at least with this book, because I think you’ll change your mind and end up really enjoying the story!

IHEBY gives the reader a chance to look into the worlds of a girl with OCD and depression as well as a girl who didn’t grow up with the best parents for role models and is now across the country, making life choices (that are now always the best ones) all while realizing that she is gay?... Bisexual?... Queer? Even she doesn’t know, just like most of us oldies out there didn’t know who or what we were at their age. Heck! I’m still trying to figure out who I am! (On a personal level, not sexual. 😳)

I cried at the end. I’ve been through a similar situation with my childhood best friend. Unfortunately for me, my BFF and I did not have an ending like Ava and Gen.

IHEBY is definitely a book that I feel any teenage girl will relate to and completely connect with. If you have a granddaughter with a birthday coming up and you don’t know what to get her, I highly suggest this book. It’s written in a style that they can relate to. It deals with the heartache of leaving home and going off to college, being separated from your BFF, and learning how to begin real life on your own.

 Dani's Score out of 5: 📚📚📚📚🔖

How to Breathe Underwater 

By Vicky Skinner

Publication Date: August 14, 2018 Genre: Young Adult, Contemporary, Romance, Realistic Fiction

Synopsis:

Kate’s father has been pressuring her to be perfect for her whole life, pushing her to be the best swimmer she can be. But when Kate finds her dad cheating on her mom, Kate’s perfect world comes crashing down, and Kate is forced to leave home and the swim team she's been a part of her whole life. Now in a new home, new school, and faced with the prospect of starting over, Kate isn't so sure that swimming is what she wants anymore. But when she decides to quit, her whole world seems to fall apart. But when Kate gets to know Michael, the cute boy that lives across the hall, she starts to think that starting over might not be so bad. There's only one problem: Michael has a girlfriend. As the pressures of love, family, and success press down on her, can Kate keep her head above water?

Purchase:

Amazon / B&N / Kobo / Google Play / IndieBound

Review:

Vicky Skinner’s How to Breathe Underwater is a coming of age story that deals with a little bit of everything, and it has Kate, a super strong 16-year-old girl to walk you through them all.

I really enjoyed this book. It dealt with everyday adult problems from a teenager’s perspective, and what its like for them to go through these issues too. How to Breathe Underwater deals with lies, divorce, anxiety, depression, love, and death on the surface of the story, but it’s what’s below the surface that makes it a great story: growing up, life-changing decisions, and being strong enough to become who you are and want to be.

While this is a young adult romance, there’s more to it than just kisses and angst between a couple of hormonal teenagers. Kate learns to stand up for herself and do what she thinks is right, while Michael deals with growing up way too fast due to an ailing parent.

How to Breathe Underwater has its fun-teen moments, and real-life events that make it a good read for any age group.

 Dani's Score out of 5: 📚📚📚📚

Me & Me 

By Alice Kuipers

Publication Date: October 2, 2018 Genre: Young Adult, Contemporary, Fiction, Magical Realism, Death

Synopsis:

It’s Lark’s seventeenth birthday, and although she’s hated to be reminded of the day ever since her mom’s death three years ago, it’s off to a great start. Lark has written a killer song to perform with her band, the weather is stunning and she’s got a date with gorgeous Alec. The two take a canoe out on the lake, and everything is perfect—until Lark hears the screams. Annabelle, a little girl she used to babysit, is drowning in the nearby reeds while Annabelle’s mom tries desperately to reach her. Lark and Alec are closer, and they both dive in. But Alec hits his head on a rock in the water and begins to flail. Alec and Annabelle are drowning. And Lark can save only one of them. Lark chooses, and in that moment her world splits into two distinct lives. She must live with the consequences of both choices. As Lark finds herself going down more than one path, she has to decide: Which life is the right one?

Purchase:

Amazon / Kobo / IndieBound

Review:

Alice Kuipers’ YA novel, Me & Me, is a story about Lark, a girl who finds herself living parallel lives: in one, she saves her boyfriend, Alec from drowning, leaving the child, Annabelle, to drown and end up in a coma; while in the other she saves Annabelle, leaving Alec to drown and end up in a coma. The question in both lives being: did she make the right choice.

I have to say, if I had been in Lark’s position that warm summer day, I’m not sure which I would have done either. And I find the concept of the story to be very interesting: your choices can have a very powerful impact on the world.

However, this is where my liking of the story ended. Once the sci-fi/supernatural aspect of the parallel lives trying to communicate and connect with one another came into play, I lost all attention for the story. It’s not that I don’t enjoy a good sci-fi novel, because I do, but I felt the sci-fi aspect of the story line actually cheapened the overall story and message.

Kuipers did a good job at tying the two story lines together, but overall the story wasn’t for me. I feel that it could have really been something special had the sci-fi aspect been left out.

 Dani's Score out of 5: 📚📚📚

Surviving Adam Meade (Surviving Adam Meade #1) 

By Shannon Klare

Publication Date: August 14, 2018 Genre: Teen & YA, Sports, Fiction, Romance

Synopsis:

Seventeen-year-old Claire Collins has a plan: get into college and leave North Carolina behind. What she doesn’t have is an idea for how to get rid of the local football star and womanizer extraordinaire—Adam Meade, who she can’t even avoid (despite many efforts), because Claire’s dad is the high school football coach. Seventeen-year-old Adam Meade never fails. He always gets what he wants… until he meets Claire, the new girl who leaves him unnerved, pissed off, and confused. But there’s something about her that he just can’t resist… With the bite of lemon meringue pie and the sugar of sweet tea, Surviving Adam Meade is a sexy and compelling young adult novel about two strong-willed people who think they know what they want but have no idea what they need.

Goodreads

Purchase:

Amazon / B&N / BAM

Review:

Surviving Adam Meade is a cute teen sports romance. It points out all of the hard and heavy questions every teenager in their senior year of high school has to ask themselves: why is so-and-so making life difficult for me; do they like me; do I have feelings for them; will we last if we don’t go to the same college; should I choose them over my dream school… and so on and so forth. I found myself asking these same questions once upon a time, and that’s something that I think most people (young adult or not) will find themselves connecting to with this story.

With that being said, I did find the characters to be a bit much: Claire is a bit of a b#*$%, while Adam is supposed to be this arrogant high school football player, but is really just a sappy love struck puppy. And while it was kind of nice to see these gender roles reversed, they were just too over the top for me.

One thing that I found to be interesting is that this is the first in the Surviving Adam Meade series. I thought this first installment ended quite well and cleanly, so I’d be a little curious to see what happens in the next one.

I don’t have a lot to say on this book. It’s not one that really stands out in my mind when I think about something to recommend. If you like cheesy-yet-swoony high school romances, then yes, I would say give this one a shot. If not, then I would move on. There isn’t a lot of depth to this story other than what you would get with a week long high school fling.

 Dani's Score out of 5: 📚📚📚🔖

Pair Them All With: Martin Códax Albariño 

A refreshing food friendly white wine, Albariño is crisp, elegant and dry. On the palate, flavors of pear, passion fruit, ripe apple, peach and lemon zest are framed by bright minerality and hints of spice. Attractive floral aromatics and brisk acidity make this a versatile, food-friendly wine. Pair with seafood, white meats, rice and fresh cheeses.

Website / Facebook / Instagram

Have a book you’d like to suggest or one you’d like me to review? Please feel free to leave your comments down below.

#Reviews - Young Adult Books #young adult books #young adult author #young adult novel #I Hate Everyone But You #I Hate Everyone But You by Gaby Dunn #I Hate Everyone But You by Allison Raskin #publication #September 2017 #contemporary #contemporary author #contemporary novel #LGBT #LGBT author #LGBT novel #young adult LGBT #young adult LGBT author #young adult LGBT novel #synopsis #purchase #amazon #barnes and noble #B&N #kobo #google play #indiebound #review #reviews #twitter #tweet

[brokendownbrown]

Regret the day I discovered alcohol as self-liberation, cuz really it was a prison.

there's so much to be said about the nature of the beast that shuts down your brain in  sequential order, that  renders consent impossible and  makes so many bad things happen to your body. there's  so much to be said for the pressures we face growing up that are unrealistic to meet. the internalized stigma around our bodies and the weird pressure that creates within as we internalize the violence that caused us the  harm in our childhood and we  continue to injure ourselves in  adolescence. 

to think that sex wasn't for me, that I was an alien, to think that there was something fundamentally wrong with me. for me not to be able to understand what that fundamental thing was, to not be able to get what was happening with me. its a cruel thing to have a child immigrate and then encourage them not to take advantage of resources that are available in the community. to be raised in a world where America wasn't form me and to be given friends who at least on surface cared about me, and showed me an incredible 17th birthday, at least I thought, but I'm so conflicted because it was so chock full of substances, the same substances that took vivek's life at 24. in college where I was constantly feeling like a monster. a layover from high school where I never went to parties and even if I was invited would always feel left out. I think people didn't want to challenge my visible orthodoxy even if it was begging for it. I was screaming for saving and no-one felt obliged. and so I kinda waifed out of school, just amid w weed smoke and beer cans, and loop pedals, and isolation. there I wrote the beginnings of what would become the discography of my life of which most seems lost. but still you start over, and over. eventually you get to a point where you've collected enough that you don't necessarily find yourself going through old archives that you made because the life you lived at the time was just too harmful to recollect. [pause] I understand that when my brain was off and I was trying to battle my demons I was in the company of people who were chasing the dragon but not necessarily for the reasons that I was. its a difficult matter to try to navigate and I really just need to continue to be honest, like my friends suggest. I think there's nooks and crannies in my mind that need to be explored yet and my friends demand better from me. so that's what I'll do. [pause] I guess I'm left with the harm that this person experienced, and I have to give them space to express that. if I don't then I'm not like doing my part, or following my friends advice, and really thats all I have in this stage. why would my friends offer advice if I wasn't going to follow it. [pause] This is a part of my being that is hard to access. I guess tears are coming out and I don't want people who've experienced harm to be lying in my wake. its a difficult matter to navigate but I'm getting good advice and I'd do well to follow it. [pause] I wish I didn't have this sense of romance when it came to drinking, like this james Bond-esque super-hero in a suit in the 70's with guns and explosions and girls. why is this like fueling my romance of what it is to drink. well dressed chavs with smarmy charismatic sneers pasted on their faces with wild eyes and hair blowing in the wind, and a cold glow about them. a sense of danger and freedom. a stubbly chin and immaculate fingernails and dapper dress interpreted through chav aesthetic. [pause] all of this and more seems to run through mind, like the whimsical joy of carrying a beer on the train in the UK and being OK. the freedom and sexiness of it all. but in reality I think about how unsexy being too drunk is. how terrible it can feel to be weighed down by whisky, to have the shades drawn mentally and medically have parts of your brain literally de-activting as per the want of alcohol to manifest. [pause] this grandiose life that wasn't for me, as an immigrant, and a kid with a super religious family, who'd never approve of partying. the knowledge of doing exactly what you weren't supposed to be doing was its own reward, a stab back at the family that would constantly torture you all day with all sorts of clothing potions that you'd never wear, all kinds of smarmy remarks about your body, asking you to weigh yourself on the scales, asking you to change your posture, asking you to change your diet. this always would fuck with me and contribute to a sense of two terrible things. [pause] me and my pal vivek would pain the town red and it was grand, like all the visions of radness that had plagued my pre-teen visions of awesome were manifesting at the age of 19. I was the badass id always dreamed to be, and it nearly killed me. I literally woke up in the ER. vivek, he went out in a body bag. so destructive was our dream. now I talk about liberation and its just weird to think that libation is more of a prison and this is almost a slogan but the truth is damning. damn it. I just wish that I wasn't sold this golden vision of substance abuse as a fast track to badassery. I never smoked a cigarette outside of a few chance parties, and hated it every time. weed never stuck. neither did any other drug. it was always alcohol for me. this weird like, sexification of a substance that was in all likelihood a turnoff the whole time. [pause] and now I guess I have a conversation pending with a person whose experienced harm due to drinking and thats going to be a day of reckoning for sure. I'm being given the harsh truth of things and id expect nothing less from my friends and partners. it is what it is, its nothing to sneeze at and I need to step my game here. I need to center their concerns. they need to know that I hear them. [pause] I grew up around bro's. like I was a chav growing up, also a grammar school kid, over in the UK. a northerner, a manc, a blackburnian, a Lancastrian. we'd wear our uniforms and say our prayers. and thats part of a tradition of schools of that nature going back hundreds of years. it was an old world thing. we were raised to love soccer. that was just the way of it. there were no bones about it, you were there, you were playing the game, you loved the game. it was also a city phenomenon, the blackburn rovers, a team that used to be badass when I was a kid but now don't even qualify for the main league. [pause] soccer was a way for me to continue a part of my culture as an immigrant who otherwise had no place to practice my accent, or any other trapping of my britishness. and then white adult comedians have the audacity to come to me and mock the state of my ability to express my internalized and still remembered Britishness as a sign of my ... [pause] its a lot to delve into. its super painful for me to talk about the way I was harmed by midwest public space to the degree that I had to self censure my own accent in order to find any escape from the harm that was being visited upon me daily by taking up space as a british, identifiably british person with religious garb of a faith they misidentified daily, another thing that I ended up leaving behind to step away from the harm coming my way. [pause] sometimes I wonder where does it end, like this weird tapestry of harm that I've internalized, the pain and the trauma, I go through my narrative and my head spins, and its hard for me to ground myself. but still, here I am all the same. [pause] what can anyone do anyway, given the world. I think about my gender and how thats buried in there somewhere, how I'm an immigrant and how thats kinda elusive for me to understand, how like... so many things. like the difficulty I have with mascara, and the few times I've worn a dress, how they've turned into jokes amongst friends. [pause] my body is a problem for me as I... like... you know, am not necessarily drawn to the standard male stuff with regards to fashion despite my swarthy appearance, and in saying that I feel like its racist to use those words. but I've spoken so few times about all this I have a lot of blunderousness in vocab to overcome. my family used to shame my body, my clothing choice, my posture, my body shape, despite being for many years the sole source of all nutrition for me. straight from my mothers kitchen to my stomach, to my body, to their eyes, their lips, and to my shame, the pain, the harm, the trauma. [pause] and I think about the boy from daycare, when I was a pre-teen, I think about the contact we made, their hand on my cheek, the electricity I felt. I think about my old neighbor, how we were close, very close, and how I missed that, and maybe they never felt the same, and maybe thats why they avoided me in years since. there have always been boys, although I'm not running after every boy I see. I have a type, and when it strikes me, it does. [pause] I'm about to do something really difficult and crazy, and I think it might work, but I am not going to pretend like I have everything figured out, I dont. I'll suck before I do better. [pause] but before all that I need to have this conversation with this person whose experienced harm. it was a surprise, a horrible one, but I have reached out and let them know I'm down to speak, and they seem down too. who knows what the right move is from there. but its important to recognize the harm that went down. and I don't know whats going to happen but it needs to and thats the main thing. on the phone he [their friend] told me to center their trauma over my ego. I'm already there trust me. but sure, feel free to say so. [pause] callouts and callins are triggering to me especially when they occur in this city because they've in my experience been used to fuel racist agendas that never get addressed, because of the power dynamics at play. but in this case I feel like maybe I can go through this process without being too worried about that.

[ultramanismycopilot]

Rants, Rants, Rants!

It’s been, what, a month since my first post in this blog? Where I claimed I would be making a weekly series of reviews of Dragon Ball Super, and then ended up doing absolutely nothing?

Well, there’s a very simple reason for that: Super has killed whatever faint interest I may have had in the hopes of seeing it get better, and it did so the immediate episode after I started this stupid blog.

Episode 98 was infuriating in more ways than one, and while I did write up a big review about it the day after watching it, I ended up losing the entire thing and was too lazy to write everything up again because I just didn’t care enough about the show to go through the trouble.

And that hasn’t exactly changed lately, as I keep seeing the rolling black clouds draw nearer and nearer with each new episode. I’ve mostly come to terms with the fact I do not like this show, but cutting through that emotional chord attaching me to it is going to take a while.

It’s still Dragon Ball, a series that’s been ridiculously close to my heart from my earliest childhood memories, so I’m constantly finding myself struggling with two halves of me: the part that’s just happy to see these characters in action again, and the part that can’t ignore the flaws that come with this new show.

I guess I just need to vent today. It’s a disjointed mess of text with no real value, but here goes:

I think it wouldn’t be too farfetched to say that Dragon Ball made up around 60 to 70% of my childhood. Shows came and went, from Pokémon to Sailor Moon, Digimon to Cardcaptor Sakura, but Dragon Ball was one of those repeating constants throughout my life, and the lives of many other people in my country.

Unlike a lot of western markets, my country received Dragon Ball first rather than being dumped straight into Z, and after Z we immediately received GT. It was an unbroken string of shows, including all the movies, that allowed any kid my age to follow along with these characters and their adventures almost entirely unimpeded. I can’t remember there ever being a big gap in between episodes or series, so if you were devoted enough (and a lot of people were in my country) you could watch everything without a worry.

And even after the original run of the shows had ended, they continued to be broadcast throughout the years, always jumping between channels and timeslots, but never quite going away for very long.

Naturally, I was sucked into the vortex of screaming muscle men punching one another from day one, as were pretty much all of my friends. I still hold a lot of memories from back then, from the things I adored, to the things I hated, and the things that scared the living daylights out of me (for the longest time, Recoome was the most frightening villain in Dragon Ball to me, until Cell showed up).

But the cool thing about being exposed to a TV show throughout my childhood, teens and young adults is, you start to develop a very reasonable view of the show. You aren’t blinded by nostalgia goggles, but you don’t let that cynicism creep into your views either. Dragon Ball is a series that’s very near and dear to my heart, but I’ll always be one of the first to point out its botches. I even remember disliking Trunks and Goten’s out-of-the-blue Super Saiyan transformation right from the get-go when I first watched it.

But I can ignore a fault here and there if the final product is still enjoyable for me, even though I’ll very often find myself thinking “it really should’ve gone this way instead”. I still enjoy Dragon Ball. I still love Z. And yes, I even quite liked GT! But Super... I’ve tried. I’ve really, really tried to give it a shot, but the further it goes on, the more reasons it gives me to despise it.

Goku is an unlikable idiot, as opposed to the likable idiot he used to be; storylines have plenty of potential, but get squandered and botched in the most pathetic of ways (that Trunks arc sure accomplished things, didn’t it!?); the notion that power level boosts and new transformations should be given proper weight and importance is all but gone (and this started way before Caulifla and Kale, don’t get me wrong, but they’ve exacerbated the issue immensely); and on a more personal level, I do not care about all the god stuff. Cool idea, but it’s saddled with such a boring execution.

Characters are unlikable for a good chunk of the cast, and even if a character is likable, any flight of fancy by the writers will shatter it for an episode or two, either out of convenience, or just for a cheap gag. There’s really nothing in this show I find myself enjoying, outside of a few ideas and possibilities that I’m pretty sure will either never be touched upon or will just get squandered like everything else. There is such a disconnect between this show and what came previously for me, that I can’t stomach it as another Dragon Ball show.

I could go into more details here, and I kinda want to, but I think I’ve done enough complaining at this point. I’m not offering anything with this post, just a lot of venting out frustration.

If you like Super, then more power to you. I would never try and persuade someone to dislike a show/movie/game because that’s just a jerk thing to do. This is just my opinion on the show’s flaws, and why I can’t enjoy it the same way a lot of people do.

Personally, I’ll take GT over Super any day.

If you’ve stuck around this long, I don’t know why, but thanks for taking the time to read all of this junk. Whether I have more Dragon Ball stuff in mind for the future... not exactly, but you never know. Still not entirely sure what to even do with this blog, so there’s probably going to be a lot of random posts about whatever is in my mind at the moment from now on.

#dragon ball #fan thoughts #whining