#it's not very clear but she's head banging. it's shitty okay!!!! it's 4 am!!!!!!!!!!

[keiitopop]

#my art #that's mimika! she's a kitty cat #it's not very clear but she's head banging. it's shitty okay!!!! it's 4 am!!!!!!!!!!

[fruitcoops]

If the requests are still open, I watched the try guys trying sexy alcohol video recently (The Try Guys Sexy Alcohol Taste Test is the name of the video) and I was laughing the whole time. I was thinking it would be really fun to have the team do it for a social media video if you wanted to write it! :)

I absolutely love the Try Guys and I’ve been watching their videos for years--thank you so much for suggesting this! Sweater Weather credit goes to @lumosinlove and the link to the original video is here

TW for alcohol and lots of sexual references

“I’m so fucking excited for this video,” Finn said, drumming his hands on the table.

Remus gave him a disbelieving look. “You have the lowest alcohol tolerance on the entire team, Harzy. I’d be shocked if you were still awake by the end of this.”

“We’ll find out soon enough!” Marlene announced offscreen. “Do the intro and then we’ll get started.”

“Welcome back to Lion Pride, folks! I’m Finn O’Hara—”

“—and I’m Remus Lupin.”

“Dude, you said I could do the intro.”

“I can’t even say my own name?”

“Boys,” Marlene warned.

Finn cleared his throat and turned back to the camera with a bright smile. “Today we’re tasting sexy alcohol, even though I have no idea what that means!”

The video cut to a different table and James waved to the camera. “Hey, everyone! I’m James Potter, and I’m here today with our wonderful captain Sirius Black to taste test sexy alcohol!”

“What qualifies alcohol as sexy?” Sirius asked. “Is it supposed to turn you on, or something?”

“The names are sexy,” Marlene clarified. “Ready for the first one?”

A title card appeared with Drink 1: Sex on the Beach written in cursive letters.

“Sex on the beach!” Remus and Finn chorused, clinking their glasses together and taking a sip. Remus made a face, while Finn looked thoughtful as he smacked his lips.

“Why is it so sour?” Remus coughed, setting the drink down.

“You’re not a fan of sex on the beach?” Finn teased. “This is always the classy lady drink in movies. It’s not bad, actually.”

James’ face scrunched up as he drank and Sirius went through a whole range of emotions, then tried it again. “It’s not better the second time,” he said. “Just…weird.”

“Much like actual sex on the beach, it’s flat out uncomfortable.” James slid the glass out of reach.

“You’ve had sex on a beach?”

“Haven’t you?”

“No, sand gets everywhere even when I don’t strip down.”

“Ha! Loser.” The video transitioned right as Sirius reached over to smack the back of his head.

Drink 2: Buttery Nipple

“A fucking what?” Remus laughed, leaning toward the camera crew. Marlene repeated the name and he nodded slowly. “Okay, that’s what I thought you said.”

Finn sniffed the shot. “Is that butterscotch?”

“It is,” Marlene said.

“Rad. On three. One, two, three!”

They knocked their shots back at the same time and Remus raised his eyebrows as he swallowed. “That’s really not that bad. Best nipple I’ve ever tasted.”

“Very sweet, I like it,” Finn agreed around his grin.

A smile twitched at the corners of Remus’ mouth. “You like the buttery nipple?”

“I do like the buttery nipple,” Finn snorted, sending them both into peals of laughter.

James stared down at his shot glass, then turned to Sirius and opened his mouth; Sirius reached over and covered it with his palm. “Don’t say it.”

“But it really looks like—”

“I know.” Sirius bit his lip, sighed, and downed the shot. “Y’know, that’s actually pretty good.”

James rolled the empty glass between his fingers. “That would give me a wicked headache in the morning.”

“Oh, yeah, for sure.”

Drink 3: Suck, Bang, Blow

There was a brief pause as Remus and Finn shared a look. “I think that’s the wrong order,” Finn said after a moment.

Remus nodded. “Bang is generally last on the list if you’re doing it right.”

“It also implies that you’re not sucking on the last part, which is just bad blowjob etiquette.”

“Bottoms up.” Remus tapped the rim of their glasses together and took a sip—almost immediately, he spat it back out. “What in the unholy fuck is that?”

“My whole face is itching,” Finn coughed. “Holy shit, there’s so many different types of alcohol in there that is just tastes like straight-up sugar. I would order this at a bar if I was horny and sad and didn’t care who I went home with.”

“Yeah, this is what you get if you want something that’ll fuck you up.” Remus paused for a second, then covered his mouth with his hand. “You know who would drink this?”

“Who?”

“People who live in Florida.”

Finn’s whole face lit up and he dug around in his back pocket, dialing a quick number on his phone before putting it on speaker; it rang twice before connecting. “ ‘Sup, Finner Finner Chicken Dinner?”

Remus’ jaw dropped and Finn rested his forehead on the table. “Thanks for that,” he sighed. “We’re filming a video for Lion Pride right now.”

“Oh, sick!” the voice on the other end said. “Hey Lions!”

“Hi, Alex!” Marlene called.

“I just have a quick question,” Finn continued. “Have you ever heard of a drink called Suck, Bang, Blow?”

“Hell yeah, they’re super popular down here.”

“Called it!” Remus grinned and high-fived Finn. “Thanks, Hazard.”

“Why do you ask?”

“Because if anyone is going to have shitty alcohol, it’s you and your bouncy ice.”

“Hey—”

Finn ended the call and put his phone away once again with a gleeful smile. “He’s never going to hear the end of that.”

Drink 4: Amber Moon

“That’s a lot of whiskey,” James said as a crewman handed them their drinks; Sirius whistled lowly and held it up to the light.

“Why are there red flakes in it?”

“Tabasco sauce,” Marlene said off screen.

James nudged Sirius with his elbow. “I bet I can drink this is ten seconds.”

“Do it in five or you’re a coward.”

“You’re on.” He cleared his throat, then tipped the glass back.

“One, two, three, four, five, six!” Sirius pumped his fists in the air with a whoop.

“You counted too fast!” James protested, giving the camera crew a desperate look. “Marley, he counted way too fast!”

“Looks like…” There was a brief moment of silence. “Five point three four seconds, Pots.”

“Fuck,” he muttered, setting the glass down. “It tasted horrible, by the way.”

The video cut to Remus and Finn, who were eyeing the drink suspiciously. “I’ll bite,” Remus said. “What’s the sexy name for a hot sauce and whiskey monstrosity?”

“Amber Moon.”

“That would be my stripper name,” the two said in unison, then turned to each other with identical gasps.

Drink 5: Blowjob Shot

Sirius looked deeply uncomfortable as he set the shot glass on his lap. “Don’t make this weird.”

“What? The part where I’m putting my face in your lap?” James asked with false innocence as a smile spread over his face.

“Merde,” Sirius muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Just get it over with.”

“That’s a rude thing to say to someone who’s about to give you a blowjob.”

“You’re not giving me a blowjob.”

James raised his eyebrows and Sirius rolled his eyes, kicking him lightly. “Alright, alright. Do you want to go first?”

Sirius leaned forward, paused halfway down, then cursed under his breath and took the shot glass between his lips, knocking it back in a quick motion. James opened his mouth and the first bit of a fake moan slipped through before Sirius tackled him to the ground.

The video cut for a moment—when it returned, they were sitting in their chairs once again, and James looked incredibly smug as he rested his elbows on his thighs. “Ready, hot stuff?”

“You’re the worst person to have as a best friend.”

James didn’t hesitate before wrapping his mouth around the rim of the glass, then made a noise of panic when it didn’t go down his throat right away. His eyes went wide and he cupped his hand under his face, slapping Sirius’ knee with the other.

“Are you okay?” Sirius laughed. “Just—just knock it back, buddy, you can do it.”

James made a muffled sound and the camera crew started snickering off screen as the whipped cream smudged over his nose.

“His eyes are watering,” Sirius cackled. “Oh, this is karma in action. Is it too much? Spitters are quitters, Pots, you can—"

James glared at him, then choked slightly and spat the shot glass and all its contents onto Sirius’ chest. Dead silence fell over the studio, broken only by the steady drip of the liqueur on the paper below their table.

“Does anyone have a napkin?” Sirius asked after a moment, shaking his hands out.

“I am…so sorry,” James said as he wiped his lower lip.

“What happened?”

“I don’t know! It was doomed from the outset, I guess.” He wrinkled his nose. “I can feel it in my sinuses.”

Remus and Finn both downed their shots easily; neither struggled for more than half a second. They were both a little flushed from the alcohol and Finn hiccupped as they turned back to the camera.

“How did you do that so well?” Marlene asked, clearly amused.

“Frat,” Finn said at the same time Remus shrugged and said, “college.”

“Pots spat his all over Sirius.”

“It’s because he’s straight.” Finn hiccupped again and Remus burst out laughing.

Drink 6: Body Shot

“Who are we doing this off of?” James asked. All four men sat at the same table; Sirius had removed his flannel and James’ cheeks were pink from five—well, four and a half—drinks.

“Guess who, bitches!” Kasey grinned as he walked out from behind the backdrop, clad only in his Lions sweatpants. James, Finn, and Remus cheered while Sirius put his head in his hands. “Shit, Cap, you’re doing wonders for my self-esteem.”

“Is this a power imbalance?”

“I’m older than you, now move your elbows so I can lay down.”

The folding table creaked as Kasey laid on his back and all five of them froze for a second until Marlene emerged with salt, lime slices, and a bottle of clear alcohol under her arm. “Do you know how this works?”

Four nods answered her and she carefully poured the tequila into Kasey’s bellybutton—he jolted at the cold and some of it spilled down his sides. “Aw, man, now my pants are damp.”

“Where—” Remus cut himself off with a laugh as he took the salt. “Where do you want us to salt you, Bliz?”

“Wherever your heart desires.” They passed the container down the line, each sprinkling a pinch somewhere on Kasey’s bare chest. “Ready?”

Finn wrinkled his nose as he licked the salt, sipped some tequila, and quickly put the lime wedge in his mouth with a distressed sound. Remus was next, and he barely skimmed his mouth over Kasey’s belly button before shoving the lime between his teeth; James missed his mark completely because Kasey was still laughing, and Sirius got some of it up his nose on accident.

“You guys suck at this,” Kasey managed as he sat up, brushing the leftover salt off his front. “Jesus Christ, have any of you been to a party in your lives?”

All four exploded into indignant protesting and the video transitioned to a final slide. “Thanks for joking us today, Lions!” Marlene said in a voiceover. “Make sure to like and subscribe for more content.”

[otvlanga]

Teldryn Sero Headcanons 4**

Here I am, creating a whole elaborate sex life for a fictional man again 😌. You may not agree, but this is what it looks like to be at the peak of your life.

I know I said I’d do Miraak before these but I just like Telly too much to wait. Miraak coming soon though. (hehe)

 I’ve given up all motivation to make these sound pretty, they’re unedited and probably sound all over the place but idc. Him sexy anyway. You know what’s below the cut, proceed at ur own risk

I think he’s definitely one of those people that believes there’s a big difference between having sex and ‘making love.’ On days where him and his partner get to indulge in slow, gentle and passionate sex, his entire vibe does a 180. While always appreciative of his partner and their body, during these moments are when he loves to express it the most. Slow, deliberate kisses down every inch of their skin he can reach -- and on every mark, scar or flaw he knows they don’t appreciate as much as he does. He loves to take his time when he has it to spare, and really get them eager while he waits patiently. He teases in a way that makes his partners feel both beautiful and desperate, making them want him while reminding them how much that desire is felt in return. Having him take such a slow and deliberate pace is his way of expressing to his partner what he may not be able to say so articulately with words -- that he loves them and that he’s there for the good and the ‘“bad”’.

You better believe he absolutely loves saying dirty praises into his partner’s ear during foreplay. Likes telling them exactly how good they’re doing and how amazing they’re making him feel. Tells them how great they look sucking his dick, how much he loves the shape of their body and such. His delivery always sounds a bit sarcastic, but it doesn’t mean he’s being any less genuine. ‘If I had known you’d be so good at this, I probably would’ve given you a discount when you hired me.’ Little remarks like that. His partners complimenting and praising him in return will surprisingly make him incredibly bashful, and he’ll likely finish much earlier than he would’ve liked. It may pose a bit of a problem for partners who are very eager in giving praise, but he always makes up for it in other ways. He’ll get a teeny bit frustrated at his partner for messing him up, but it’s never genuine displeasure, and he expresses his appreciation tenfold in return. This mer is always incredibly grateful for some tender care, okay? It’s not often that he gets treated with such gentleness, physically or emotionally. He’s all snark and blades and fire on the outside, but he’s a family-man at heart. He loves his work and staying on the move, but he does have desires to settle down one day, and holds the people he cares for incredibly close and dear to his heart. He may not be the most verbally receptive of compliments, but his partner will certainly know he’s heard them. Compliments relating directly to him get him going much more than compliments about what he’s doing. Telling him he’s going a good job down there doesn’t do much because he knows it and can tell in other ways. But having his partner call him mushy things like beautiful or amazing will make him lose his breath for a moment, and get him blushing like a dork (much to his dismay).

He enjoys risky quickies from time to time, and finds the sight of his partner frantically trying to make themselves look decent afterwards absolutely hilarious. He’s a little bastard, and it’s quite easy to get him all hot and bothered even in less than appropriate places, so it’s not uncommon for him to sneakily pull his partner into some secluded corner to bang one out. “Right now? In a draugr crypt? Eh, why not.” *unzipping sounds* Especially likes to do it right before him and his partner are due to meet with Jarls or other important people, because their ignorance and obliviousness to what him and his partner were just doing in the extravagantly empty library is entertaining to him. Jarl Balgruuf could be drawling on about a bounty or something and Teldryn’s inner monologue is just ‘this moron has no idea I just took my spouse to the cloud district right in his palace lol’

I see him as someone who’s definitely a bit more vocal than most guys. He’s not much for loud or obscene dirty talk outside of foreplay, but he makes a lot of sounds -- especially if his partner decides to kiss or stroke along the edges of his ears.  Likewise he certainly doesn’t mind when his partners crank the volume up a bit, but any sort of excessive yelling or moaning will turn him off. Elves have quite sensitive ears, and he’s more of a visual and touch-based person when it comes to sensory information anyway. He’s much more content with seeing and feeling what effects he has on his partners rather than hearing them. Feeling and seeing his partners quiver above or beneath them, clenching around his cock, grabbing at him and digging their nails into his skin or hair, while he watches them throw their head back -- those are all the best indicators to him that they’re thoroughly enjoying what he’s doing. 

If his partner is someone who has a period, he has no problem with having sex during those days. In fact, he encourages the idea himself. He’s certainly no stranger to blood, and frankly, he doesn’t care that it may be a bit gross and messy. He’s a grown mer, he’s seen quite a few jarring horrors during his life and a bloody towel on the bed certainly isn’t anywhere close to being one. He’s aware that orgasms can help ebb away cramps as well, and would be quite eager to take up the chance to help his partner feel good and relieve their pain. He’s also extra thorough with aftercare afterwards, insistent on helping them get cleaned up and changed -- even helping them bathe if they’d like. If his partner isn’t up sex during their period, he won’t pressure them -- but he’s very clear in expressing the fact that if they change their mind, he’s totally down. 

Though he’s willing to try a lot of things at least once, there are certain things he draws the line at. He doesn’t enjoy slapping or hitting his partners much, and especially doesn’t like insulting or degrading them. No amount of begging and insisting will get him to call them offensive names or hurt their feelings, even if they’re into it. Hitting or insulting them on purpose makes him feel shitty regardless of how much they enjoy it. He’ll be alright with using words like ‘slut’ or ‘whore’ if they want it, but refuses to use anything more offensive than that. He doesn’t like smacking his partners in the face, and doesn’t like them doing it to him either. He has a high amount of respect for his partners, and isn’t comfortable harming them with his hands-- he will spank them if they ask, but that’s it. He doesn’t mind biting them or pulling their hair either, or having them do it to him, since it's not as extreme and he does enjoy being a bit intense. He also isn’t entirely opposed to using knives or blades in the bedroom since they’re his specialty, and he trusts himself not to accidentally sever an artery. He might be able to enjoy feeling his partner tense and shudder underneath him, as she runs a faint line up their back with the tip of a dagger -- or cutting their undergarments off them if permitted.

He probably doesn’t fall asleep right after, but he’s also not really one for pillow talk, either. He’ll pack a pipe with tobacco and smokes a bit, and maybe has a cup of Sujamma if there’s any on hand, and he’s more than willing to share with his partner if they’d like. He has an odd habit of impulsively trying to feed his partners after he fucks them, even though he doesn’t really enjoy cooking. He’ll get up to go wash off, and then come back twenty minutes later with a whole platter of food he got at the inn/tavern, or threw together with what they had packed. Probably pulls the old 'you need to keep yourself nourished after vigorous work blah blah blah' line because he’s secretly riddled with some sort of deeply buried maternal instincts that make him insist they stay healthy and nourished at all times. 

#teldryn sero #headcanons #skyrim #tes #tesv #tesblr #dragonborn #dunmer #solstheim #the elder scrolls #hee hoo I love him

[bangtae-sohotddaeng]

we’ll be counting stars | k.th. | 2

(^ gif cred: ON THE VOYAGE | pinterest)

pairing: idol!Taehyung x publisher!Reader

rating: nc-17 (for language and themes)

summary: You’d sworn off love and relationships forever. You were here to do your job - work with the biggest boyband of the world. Not forge friendships and...and whatever it was that you and Taehyung were building up with these sneaky glances. It was, to be very fair, your Chief Editor’s fault that you’d landed in this mess. Maybe you should quit your job? Maybe you should quit life -

Oh, he was staring again, and did he freaking lick his lips?

warnings: swearing (reader’s got a potty mouth) + this is set like 5 years in the future + reader has emotional issues, she's a relationship phobe + mentions of weed

genre: so much ANGST ugh + fluff + comedy + some crack

words: 3.3 k

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gimme feedback, much much appreciated!

“We’re all clear on the schedule, but I’ll repeat it for your sake,” you announced.

Your team was huddled around you, right outside the airport, with their luggage in their hands. You’d landed in Seoul less than an hour ago.

“So, right now, we’re going to take a cab to the hotel our company has booked us. We’ll rest, let our bodies recharge and adjust—because we left on Friday morning and reached Saturday morning in thirteen hours.” You grimaced. “Dunno about you, but my mind needs to adjust.”

You received collective groans of agreement in response.

“Great, you feel me. So we all do that first. And then we’ll collect in the lobby after lunch, at around 4 pm? I’ll have a word with BTS’ manager, and he’ll arrange for our commute. I’ll update you of the exact time, then. For now, let’s just go grab naps.”

You all hailed three taxis to the hotel, with Sana grabbing you by the elbow to make you sit with her. You did so, with a frown. She looked nervous. 

“Y/N!” she almost wailed as soon as you’d shut the door. 

The driver looked at her in alarm. You winced in embarrassment, and apologized in Korean. He started the car without a word.

“Sana, compose yourself. What is the matter with you?” you scolded the girl.

“Y/N, how am I gonna face him? I might freeze up at sight! And—and what if my brain starts to think up scenarios from… oh God, you won’t believe the kind of fanfiction-stuff I’ve read about him!”

Your ears started to warm up. You had some idea. It had been a while, sure, but you could still vividly remember the kind of fanfictions you yourself had indulged in—

Wait a second. This girl was gonna make you nervous, too!

“Okay, Sana, enough. It doesn’t matter how cute you find Yoongi, he’s our client. We’re gonna have to be formal with him. At all costs. We mess it up, we lose our jobs. You get that? So, think about your husband, try to be the professional woman he married, and for God's sake, stop making me overthink shit!”

Sana shut up, then, but her eyes still looked worried. "How do you do it, Y/N?"

You frowned. "How do I do what? I don't have a fucking crush on Yoongi!"

She gave a small laugh, looking slightly more at ease. "Exactly! How?"

You blinked, confused.

"I mean," she elaborated, "not just him. In general. How do you manage to not get dragged down by feelings and stuff?"

"I kinda had to." You snorted. "People are like leeches, Sana. You only stand a chance for a good, peaceful life if you avoid getting too close to them. Get caught up in feelings, get your soul sucked out of you. Get crushed under expectations, live the rest of your life trying to fulfil them. Die on the inside before your body perishes.” You shrugged. “A pretty horrid way to die, if you ask me.”

Sana gave a huff of laughter. “Who hurt you, Y/N?”

You froze. Sana probably said that rhetorically, but it still hit you hard enough.

It wasn’t the question of who hurt you, but actually, who you had hurt.

You shut your eyes for a few extended seconds, willing yourself to not think of the past. You succeeded for the most parts, too. But then Sana nudged your shoulder.

“Hey, I didn’t—I didn’t mean to upset…you…” She trailed off with a worried look on her face when you shot her a glare. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m not upset,” you grumbled, turning to look out of the window. “I’m just done with my quota of personal-unnecessary-unneeded-interactions with people, for the day.”

You heard Sana sigh. Mentally, you sighed, too.

You all found the two vans a bit excessive. There were eight seats in one—there were seven of you. But Manager Woo insisted that the boys actually used three of these to commute, so even this was a bit miserly of the management.

Rich people problems. 

You shook your head with a small smile. “It’s all okay,” you said to the Manager in Korean, following his lead into the BigHit offices where you were to meet your clients for the first time, ever.

You chanced a discreet glance at Sana. Maybe your frustrated, shitty pep-talk in the taxi had actually worked, because she looked a lot more held together than she had ever since you dragged her onboards with this project.

“This way,” Manager Woo instructed you, gesturing towards a lift. “The security personnel will lead you to the second floor, and into the meeting room. I will join you in a while.”

You bowed and your team followed, and then you all stepped into the elevator that looked big enough to hold the meeting within itself. Two security guards, all suited up with a tie and fitted with earpieces in a stereotypical bodyguard look, followed you in.

You exhaled, rubbing your hands together. “Guys,” you addressed your team in English. “You all have the detailed itinerary on your tabs, right?” At their nods, you pulled your own iPad out. “Good. Keep it on you when I talk about it with them.”

“Y/N,” Simon called out to you.

You looked at the fidgety guy with raised eyebrows.

“Are we gonna stick with the choices…” He trailed off when your eyes narrowed.

“We’ve spent more than seventy-two hours researching, Simon. Please stop with this.”

Simon gulped, but shut up. 

The elevators opened up, just then. One of the guards stepped out, and gestured towards the glass doors on the right. “That is the meeting room,” he said in Korean.

You all stepped out, elegantly, and you turned to bow to the two guards. “Thank you,” you said in Korean

They bowed in return, looking slightly flustered, and stepped back into the lift. You turned to face the meeting room, inhaled deeply, and then exhaled.

“Come on, guys. Showtime.”

You led your team as they walked behind you in pairs. Once you got to the doors, a guard stepped up from inside the room, and opened the doors for you.

A long meeting table sat in the centre of the room, with seven occupants on one of its sides. BigHit’s Founder and CEO sat at the head of the table, and the foot lay vacant—reserved for, you assumed, the Manager. Seven chairs also lay vacant for your team, opposite the BTS members.

As the door gave way, the CEO met your eyes. You gulped your nerves, and plastered a smile on your face. As you all crossed the threshold, the eight people seated on the table stood.

Dragging in a deep breath, you placed your tablet on the table before you faced them all. “Hello everyone,” you enunciated in Korean, and then bowed.

Your team followed your lead, and the people in the room bowed back. You kept your professional smile in place, discreetly wiping your sweating hand on the thigh of your cotton pants. Then you nodded at the CEO and he asked everyone to settle down.

“Welcome to Korea,” the CEO started. “Did you get here okay?”

“Besides the jet-lag, we’re actually very good,” you told the CEO to receive chuckles in response.

“Manager Woo will join us in a few seconds,” he then continued, looking between your team and the boys—that you were yet to properly look at—and gestured towards them. “Meanwhile, let’s introduce ourselves. I’m Bang Si-Hyuk, BigHit’s founder and CEO. Nice to meet you.”

You bowed, telling him your own name, and then shook hands with CEO Bang. Standing from your place, you finally willed your gaze to focus on the faces of the members instead of nervously looking into space.

Oh, wow. Cameras didn’t do these guys any justice, apparently. Not even the 8K ones, because they were really freaking beautiful human beings.

Dressed in lounge wear consisting mainly of extremely baggy hoodies as far as you could gauge, they still managed to look jaw-droppingly gorgeous. And their skin was glowing so bright, it looked unreal. But it was very much real because you were sitting across a three foot wide table from them, you could tell. It looked so soft.

You’d tightly held your lips up in a smile to save your mouth from dropping open.

While you were trying to get a grip on yourself, your eyes landed on a pair of brown ones framed by gorgeous lashes, right opposite to you. They were looking down. But then, they were looking up, as if sensing your gaze on them. Your professional grin involuntarily melted into a genuine one as Taehyung gave you a bashful nod of acknowledgement. You nodded back.

“Hello,” you mumbled, watching as his eyes grew wider. You blinked, releasing how private that sounded. You cleared your throat and ducked your head before looking at all of the seven guys in turn and nodding at each one of them. “Hello to you all,” you addressed them in Korean this time and told them your name. “And this is my team.” You gestured with both hands to your sides. “We’ll be your interviewers and companions for the next six months.”

A flurry of bows, nods and hellos passed over the table, followed by your teammates announcing their names. You doubted any of these would be retained, including your own. Which is why you handed over the seven identical copies of all your resumes to the CEO. “Here, Mister CEO. My boss had mailed them over to you, but these are to help the boys get acquainted with us better,” you told the man, and he gave you an appreciative seeming smile.

“That’s thoughtful of you,” Namjoon suddenly said, smiling with dimples up at you from his place on Taehyung’s right. His black hair was ruffled and a circular framed pair of glasses rested on his eyes. “I’m RM,” he said in English, “but please call me Namjoon. It’s a pleasure meeting you and your team.”

You smiled wide, shaking his hand when he forwarded it. His skin felt super soft, just as you’d expected it to be by looking at it.

The rest of the boys followed suit, minus the handshaking. They all insisted you all call them by their real names, which felt almost funny to you, because you were gonna be unwinding their whole life. This felt so unnecessary.

Just then, the door opened and Manager Woo reappeared. He bowed his head in the CEO’s direction before taking a seat to your extreme left, at the foot of the table. “Hello, everyone,” he said, “did I miss anything?”

“Just the introductions,” Namjoon filled him in with a smile. 

Manager Woo nodded and then looked at you. “The next thing to talk about is the schedule your team has planned for us, so that we can sort out any doubts or disagreements that might be there.”

Nodding, you pulled up the itinerary on your iPad, and cleared your throat. “I have planned out a strategy of working on interviews, and then sitting back to compile everything in an orderly fashion,” you announced. “We’ll divide each one of the six months we have on our hands into two groups—three weeks of discussions, and one week of compilation. All seven of us would be working with one member each, one on one, continuously for a time span of three weeks. After that my team will sit together, compare notes and move forth with the actual writing part. Then we’ll check if something has been missed by someone and arrange for its cover up, before we move forward into the next set of three weeks.”

You turned to look at your team to see if any of them wished to add anything, but they nodded at you with discrete thumbs ups. You exhaled in relief.

CEO Bang nodded at Manager Woo, who hummed in response. “Sounds workable to me. Boys?” He gestured towards the band members.

You looked up to find seven pairs of round eyes and gawking mouths. 

Murmurs ran across the seven angels seated opposite you. While they were distracted, you took your sweet time looking at each one of their faces. They really did look unreal.

Next to CEO Bang, Jin and Yoongi were engrossed in some discussion. With their heads bent, their hair shined blindingly bright—Yoongi’s like liquid silver, and Jin’s like molten lead. Next to Jin, Namjoon was adjusting his glasses over his shut eyes as he listened to Taehyung whisper something in his ear, and kept shaking his head in response every few seconds. Taehyung was almost drowning in his oversized hoodie with the hood up, as he used his hands with those elegant ass fingers of his to cover his mouth while speaking into Namjoon’s ear. Next to him, Jimin was nodding along to Hoseok as the latter spoke in whispers, gesticulating widely. 

Your eyes fell onto the far end of the table, then. Jungkook, who was already looking at you, shot his hand up when your gazes met. His eyes were literally sparkling with curiosity.

“Yes?” you asked with a big smile.

Jungkook flashed his teeth at you, looking not a day over five years of age. “Is one week enough time to write?”

You frowned. “In theory, yes. But if things go south and we need more time, we can always extend the contract. Mr. CEO?”

“According to the clauses in the contracts, definitely.” CEO Bang nodded with a small smile. “The book has to be good. We can compromise with everything, except for the quality.”

You nodded in understanding. There was an extendable clause in your contract, but you had every intention to not have to employ it. Not only did your boss have huge expectations from you, but you yourself were determined to give this project your best. Better than your best. You’d wanted to manage a complete project by yourself for so long, this was your chance of a lifetime to shine.

Taehyung’s hand shot up, breaking you out of your thoughts. He looked beyond adorable with his eyes rounded and lips nervously folded in.

“Ye—yes?” you stuttered very unprofessionally and then covered up with a cough.

“Who works with who?” he said in a breath, confusing you for a moment. “Will you take chits out? Or ask us to choose?”

“Oh, no no.” You chuckled when you caught his drift. “We’ve already decided among ourselves and also done some homework. You’ll find your personal interviewers in your contract copies.”

“Did you decide by picking out chits?” Namjoon grinned at you, and you laughed.

It had been chits, but you weren't about to tell them that. “Something like that.” You shrugged, playfully, and giggles rolled over the table.

Manager Woo, then, launched into a set of instructions for the band members. CEO Bang kept adding details in the middle, and the band members just kept nodding along in a bored fashion. Maybe they’d been over this multiple times.

You sat back to relax, observing everyone as you listened to the set of rules and procedures you were already familiar with. You looked from the corner of your eye as Jimin elbowed Taehyung. 

“Did you want to work with someone in particular?” Jimin’s whisper into Taehyung’s ear floated over to you.

Taehyung’s eyes briefly met yours, nearly burning a hole through your head by the deep curiosity emanating from them. And then he ducked his head again, shrugging Jimin off of him. 

You swallowed, roughly. Oh, God.

Manager Woo wound up his instructions with a repetition of be as honest as you can be, and then called out to you. “Do you wish to add something, Miss?”

You looked at your team. They shrugged. You shrugged, too. “You’ve covered it really well, Mister Manager. I’d actually like to emphasize one of your points—this is not an interview.” You looked across the table, at each of their faces, turn-wise. “There would be no cameras, no recorders, and no one monitoring your actions. Relax and be at ease. You should, in fact, think of the sessions as making new friends. You tell them about yourself, and they tell you about themselves. Only difference being, what you tell them will get compiled in a book so there must be a bit more of that.”

Your eyes met Taehyung’s and he nodded with a small laugh. The others gave you similar reactions, with Hoseok giving a two-fingered salute.

“That’s good. Also, Miss, we would like to request your team to work around the boys’ bodyguards.” Manager Woo looked at you earnestly.

“We’re really very grateful that you’ve agreed to our request for privacy and not enforced the sessions to be with the boys’ managers.” You shrugged a shoulder, and exchanged glances with Sana and Nathan. “And so, we would be okay working in the presence of the bodyguards, no issues.”

Your team hummed and nodded their own agreements. Manager Woo nodded back with a huge smile, looking relieved.

“We have the first interview scheduled for the day after tomorrow,” he then said as he distributed the individual contract copies among the BTS members and then your team. “Have a look at the details, one last time.”

You could, by this point, recite the clauses of the contract in your sleep. Yet, to be respectful, you accepted the file and placed it before yourself. You looked to your right and then left at your team. “Any questions, guys?”

Meryl raised her hand. Your eyebrows rose in intrigue. You gestured for her to speak up. “Yeah, um. About the secrecy clause—can we get a rough estimate as to when the news of the biography will be released?”

You nodded along. That was kind of a good question.

Manager Woo looked at CEO Bang, and all seven boys’ eyes adorably followed. CEO Bang readjusted his glasses. “We are planning a press conference at the end of six months.” Whoa. “I believe you’re going to have to keep this secret for the entirety of the project.”

You exhaled. It was gonna be kinda hard, but you’d manage. 

“I got you!” 

Your head snapped up at Jungkook’s shout of joy. He held the file in one hand and the other was raised up, mid-cheer. When all eyes fell on him, he froze for a moment before folding onto himself, bashfully. The boys all broke out laughing. You too had to stifle yours, by looking down in your lap, to maintain your professionality. 

When you looked up after a moment, your eyes met Taheyung’s again. He seemed to be slightly confused and kept looking between the file in his hand, you and Jungkook.

“Si… Simon?” he whispered with a heavy accent, but it was all you could hear despite the chaotic discussions happening all around you. 

You pointed at the guy sitting next to you. “Him,” you responded in English.

Taehyung’s eyes reverted back to you. “You?” he asked in English, very quietly.

You paused. “Jungkook,” you responded, gesturing to the still blushing boy with your eyes. And then, realizing how intimate your exchange was, you flashed him a professional smile. “Simon is great at conversation! You’ll have a good time with him,” you old him loudly, in Korean, earning smiles from the Manager and CEO.

Taehyung had still looked a bit lost when you tore your gaze away from him and picked up your tablet, but you willed yourself to unlock the gadget and not let your eyes stray.

This was just your first meeting, and Taehyung’s person’s intensity was already too much to handle. You thanked God you weren't gonna work with him one on one, or you won’t survive.

But, little did you know.

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gimme feedback, much much appreciated!

Tags: @tangledsparkles​ @hoefortaeshands​ @getmemyfries

#taehyung angst #bts angst #taehyung fluff #bts fluff #taehyung imagine #bts imagine #bts v #v angst #v fluff #v imagine #wbcs #*mine

[redhawtriot]

Baby Boom (Bakugou x Reader)

Sooo... I think It’s the size of my tag list that was fucking this chapter up so much! Every time I have more than my previous chapter had, this chapter deletes itself from my page/drafts! I’ve contacted Tumblr about it, but don’t cross ur finger’s on that one lol. I am sorry if you weren't able to make the list!

(If you beta read for me you could read the chapters up to an entire day ahead of every else tho! If ur interested in that, just inbox me!)

HnM

Tip Jar ☕- Not expected but always appreciated💞

Month 1, Month 2 , Month 3,

--Month 4--

‘SLAM!’

The front door crashed shut like ammunition through cannon fire. The sharp bang clapped and echoed throughout the small, otherwise quiet living space, and soon, three roommates filed out of their respective rooms. One by one, they inched out to get a glimpse of the oncoming storm: Hurricane Katsuki.

Denki warily removed his gaming headpiece as Bakugou whipped past his bedroom door, “Oh hey, Bakugou! You sure disappeared outta nowhere. We coulda used the backup in squads! Where’d ya go, man!?” 

The others listened carefully for the explosive blond’s answer, but got nothing short of an insult in return,

“None of your business, you damn idiots. GO DIE ALREADY!” and with that, Hurricane Katsuki simply slammed the door shut-- somehow even louder than before.

Kaminari, who had gotten the brunt of the explosion, was left wide eyed,

“Woah…”

Sero gave a low whistle as he shook his head at Bakugou’s shut door, “Looks like a wild Teenage Bakugou has entered the chat.”

Denki gave an abrupt, slightly uncomfortable chuckle at the remark, but soon gulped, giving his roommates a concerned gaze, “So… should we…” he trailed off.

Kirishima fervently nodded, stepping fully out into the hallway, “I’ll go check on him, guys.” He flexed before making his way to Bakugou’s room—a nervous habit he had picked up somewhere along the line to reassure himself before he dived headfirst into rough situations.

He looked back to his other two roommates one last time and threw a pleading glance as if to say “Wish me all of the luck” before giving a few slight knocks to the rage-secreting room, “Bakugou,” he called out, “You okay, buddy? I know that there is something up. There’s no point in hiding it…we can talk?”

No answer.

Kirishima gave a long sigh, “Well, when you finally want to talk about it, you know where to find me...” 

The other roommates sighed as well before both retreating to their rooms and shutting their doors. Kiri turned to make his way back to his room as well, but only made it a few feet before Bakugou’s door sharply yanked open a few inches.

“Where are those other idiots?” Bakugou’s eyes were redder than their usual vermilion as he glared out from the cracked doorway. Kirishima gave a thick blink in surprise. Had he… had he been crying?

“They back in their rooms?” Bakugou said very lowly. His voice had an extra hint of raspiness weighing it down, Kirishima noticed.

“Y-Yeah.” Eijirou quickly replied, startled by the unseemly sight of his best friend, “They’re prolly back on the game by now.” Bakugou did not say another word as he threw his door open a few more inches and marched deeper into his room to stiffly throw himself on the edge of his bed. Kirishima cautiously followed him-- this was as good of an invitation as any in ‘Bakugou language.’

Bakugou sat, glaring seriously at the floor in front of him, as if it offended him, and his leg bounced nervously. The red head uncomfortably cleared his throat. ‘Holy shit, what the hell is going on…?’  Kirishima had never seen him do that before, “You.. uh.. you wanna talk about it, buddy?”

No answer.

Kirishima waited a few beats before releasing another sigh and shutting the door behind him so that he could make his way to the bed. He sat down next to his best friend and simply sat deep in the silence with him. The two waited for what seemed like hours before someone finally spoke up,

“I got a girl pregnant,” Bakugou said very flatly, still glaring at the floor and bouncing his leg.

Kirshima had to stifle the choke that erupted out of his throat as his own saliva sneaked into his larynx, “Ack! Achkaka!” His natural bodily functions were completely forgotten as his brain tried to compute the sudden and drastic information that was just thrown at him.

Bakugou?? Pregnant? He never thought he would hear the words in the same room, let alone the same sentence! The guy hardly ever did anything but work, work out and come home to play video games. He didn’t converse with people. He didn’t get girls pregnant. Girls didn’t even look at him!

In his coughing fit, Kirishima’s speech was also forgone, “I-I- uh.. man that.. wow I…” he tripped and tumbled over his words. He was dreaming. He had to be. Well, either that or he had wandered into some strange episode of the Twilight Zone or something.

Bakugou’s glare at the floor intensified, “I thought she might not be so bad… but I didn’t want to be with her like this,” Kirishima’s eyes widened at the underlying tone of hurt buried under his friend's words, and then they widened even further once he realized what he just said.

Had Bakugou fallen for someone for the first time?? And then his eyes widened the furthest as things finally began to click within his confused mind.

He sucked into a sharp gasp, “You mean that model!?”

Bakugou simply scoffed, finally relieving his glare form the ground and focusing his hot gaze on Kirishima, “Yeah, turns out she’s actually a fucking bitch.”

Kirishima’s jaw dropped, “BAKUGOU! That’s the mother of your child! You shouldn’t—”

“She didn’t remember the night at all. I was just another fuck toy for her,”  Bakugou stood up and clenched his fists over and over again as if they itched to be slammed against something—tears welling up in his red-hot eyes, “Now tell me if the roles were reversed, how shitty it’d be then, huh?” Kirishima immediately shut his mouth from speaking up anymore as he allowed his friend to release his feelings. It wasn’t often that Bakugou built up enough to let things out this way.

Bakugou scoffed again as he began pacing the room, but Kirishima swore that it had the hint of a cry layered within it somewhere, “they might not even be mine since she likes that ‘fuck toy shit’ so much. That night meant nothing to her…” he threw his arm against the wall, effectively tearing a hole into it

Kirishima jumped a bit from the action as his mind briefly wandered to the security deposit on their lease. He pushed these thoughts away as Bakugou stiffly returned to the bed, his leg bouncing even more fervently than before.

Kirishima simply watched for a moment to allow his friend to simmer down before he spoke up very softly, “But you think it is yours though…”

Bakugou’s eyes snapped up to Kirishima’s, whose eyebrows were furrowed deeply into each other as he stared back.

In all his years of knowing Katsuki Bakugou, Kirishima would have never described his best friend with anything even resembling ‘gullible.’ His gut feeling and instinct were as sharp as ever and hardly ever wrong,

“Must be for a reason then…” he tried to look past the tears that filled up within his best friends eyes but they still left his heart feeling a little heavier than usual,  “If you think it’s yours then I’ll have your back no matter what buddy. You’re not alone in this.”

“They.”

“What…” Kirishima eyebrows folded toward the center of his expression.

“She’s having fucking twins.”

“Holy Sh…” Kirishima quickly swallowed his words as he took in the forlorn expression plastered onto his friend’s face. There was no room for him to be shocked right now. He had to be Bakuous ‘rock’ so to speak, “I-I mean congratulations!”

Meanwhile you found yourself studying the woman in the reflection of your mirror. Your eyes trailed every detail of her swollen, red eyes. Then to her hair that was fuller than you had remembered—the beauty of bottled color maybe? You danced over the way that loose strands stuck to the slimy mess of tears and mucosa that had accumulated on your cheeks.

Nasty.

A sharp chuckle came out of you, spittle following not too shortly after, but as it reached your ears it resembled more of a cry.

Okay, that’s enough self loathing for one lifetime.

And with that, you moved away from the mirror; however, as you did so, your sight basically smacked the open cabinet of liquor bottles that you were eyeing earlier.

Okay…. Maybe not quite enough self loathing. Your mouth began watering at the delectable sight. It was a desert after a delicious four course meal.  There was always room for more…

With a shake of your head, you brought your hand up to smack these thoughts out of your mind. What was wrong with you? You had been a lot of things in life, but were you really so low to bring yourself to effectively murdering your own children?

That’s what would happen if you drank, right?

You loudly groaned as more tears slipped from your eyes. You really didn’t know shit when it came to this pregnancy thing.

Your mind briefly wondered to Baby Notes Vol 1. You should probably take the time to actually read through it a little. Skimming it wouldn’t kill you.

Physically.

The sudden pounding at your door snapped you almost immediately out of your thoughts.

“Y/N?? Y/N, it’s me!”

With a final pathetic sigh you found yourself gathering up all the alcohol from the cabinets that you could into your arms and placing them in the bathtub before jotting over to the door.

As soon as you opened it Deku barged in and gripped you softly,  “I came as soon as you called! What’s up, what's wrong?! Are you okay??” His eyes frantically danced around your wet eyes and red sockets before he allowed them to roam all over you, checking for injury.

He wouldn’t ever think that Kacchan was the type of guy to put his hands on you, especially with how much he’s grown since high school, but the nagging voice in the back of Izuku’s mind fervently reminded him of all of the bruises and burns and numberless emotional scars he accumulated with he was quirkless from his childhood friend.

And here was a woman he deeply cared about-- quirkless—having to spend time alone with said childhood friend.

“What’s wrong??” Izuku found himself repeating as his hands mindlessly wiped the fluid from your cheeks. As soon as he committed the action, however, his face ran completely red and he quickly released you from his grip, so that he could get a grip of himself.

You didn’t notice his slip up, and if you did you sure as hell didn’t care at the moment. There were more pressing matters at hand. Two to be exact, “Twins,” you simply said to him as tears began flowing down your cheeks more furiously.

“Huh? Oh… Oh.” Izuku’s eyes went wide as your words sunk in. As soon as he threw you an obviously apologetic glance you threw yourself into his chest and sobbed throwing him a bit off guard as he barely caught you in his arms.

Izuku’s eyes nervously roamed around your home as if he were searching for the right thing to say to you, but as he made contact with an open pantry in your kitchen, his jaw dropped-- your alcohol pantry.

It was far less full than it had been the last time that he visited, “Y/N… What’s with the… have you been drinking?” he pulled you away from his chest and looked seriously into your eyes.

The sight honestly kind of scared you a little—like a 15-year-old being caught with their first beer-- that is, until you remembered that you were innocent as fuck, “No,” you gave a slight chuckle through your tears at the sudden surge of intimidation, “I need your help getting rid of it.”

You walked away from Izuku for a moment, leaving him confused and a bit wary of where this was going, until you returned with a hammer—leaving him even more concerned,

You were aiming for bad ass Harley Quinn vibes, but you were sure that with a dried trail of tears on your cheeks and the force smile splitting your face you came across like more of a psycho ass Harley Quinn. Furthermore, the look on Deku’s face screamed that you were correct (also it screamed ‘GET THIS GIRL IN A STRAIGHT JACKET!’).

“What are you gonna do with THAT?” Izuku squealed.

“I need to get my favorite bottles out of the house. Stat. and you're gonna help me.” At your words, Deku gave a gigantic sigh of relief, but still kept his eyes glued on the hammer in your hands. You noticed and shrugged a bit, “Smashing things is also really cathartic. I am sure you of all people can agree with that.”

“Heh… Yeah. But are you sure this is okay? I mean, I don't want to raise your blood pressure or anything because--”

“Deku. Less talk, more smash,” you threw a towel in your tub to make clean up a little easier, and so you didn't knock a chunk of tile on your bathtub. You gave Deku one last glance. He was still looking very uncertain, but you threw him a short smile before bringing the hammer down onto a bottle of tequila. The bottle instantly shattered, sending bits of glass throughout your tub. You looked up to give Deku an excited glance, and surprisingly, he returned one right back.

“See? Not so bad!” 

But you spoke too soon as the scent kicked you in the fucking nose. It was too far to turn back now. You choked down your nausea and handed Deku the Hammer, “You go ahead and get started. I’ll go get another weapon-- I mean… tool,” you corrected yourself after he sent you a terrified stare.

As you made your way back to the after grabbing your second weapon-- I mean tool a sudden thought crossed your mind. Without hesitation, you pulled your phone out and dialed in,

“Hello?”

“Yes. How may I help you today?” Dr. Yamakawa sounded from the other line.

“It’s Y/N…Y/N L/N…” you trailed off, hoping that you wouldn't have to say the ‘p word’ or anything relating to it.

His old ass better take the hint. To your dismay, his old ass did not take the hint, and a long pause of awkward silence filled the air.

You pursed your lips together in annoyance, “Mama Bakugou,” you clarified through gritted teeth, still dancing around the fact that you were a maternity patient of his.

“Ohhhhh!” He exclaimed, causing your face to fall into an expression of disappointment as he continued, “What can I do for you, Mama Bakugou?!”

This mf. You internally ground and fought the urge to facepalm, “Well. I need you to write a doctors note for me.”

“For…?”

“Work?”

“For your pregnancy? Dear, why don’t you just take maternity leave for that?”

“No.” In the moment you shook your head even knowing that he couldn't see you,  “I need a few weeks more before I can tell my job about this… situation. I’m a model. They own me through a contract and I didn't exactly add two roommates to the lease on my body...”

There was a pause on the other line, causing your heart to lurch a bit, but things soon went back to normal when he finally spoke up, “I’ll see what I can do. I’ll email you something.”

You gave one final thanks (and an internal ‘yessss’) before making your way back to the bathroom, “Hey Deku, sorry it took me so long I was just--” you froze at the sight in front of you. The shirt that Izuku wore was completely drenched in liquid and your tub had a gigantic hole on the side.

Your lips fumbled over themselves as you gawked at the spectacle. Deku could only send you a nervous laugh,

“Uh, hahaaa… Can we be done now? This… this burns,” he rapidly blinked the liquid from his eyes as he glances back down to the lot of broken bottles in your tub before throwing your one more pleading glance.

You choked down a laugh, causing it to flee from you in the form of a snort, “Someone had some pent up aggression, huh?”

In response, his face delved into a deep shade of red, “I.. uh..” he had no idea how to answer you when you looked at him like that-- your lips curved into a stunning smirk of a smile. Izuku promptly cleared his throat, “C-can I take a shower?”

“Obviously not that one-- you're totally fixing that by the way Mr. Big Shot Hero,” with a laugh you swiftly made your way to him and carefully grabbed the hammer from his grasp, looking up to see his face dive even deeper into crismon. You flashed a smile at the display. He really was adorable as hell.

You took in his face bit by bit-- his soft, blushed skin, his freckles cheeks, his round eyes. As you digested his expression you swore you could see an entire forest within his stare. Suddenly your heart pinged.

“Uh, Y/N,” Izuku interrupted your thoughts, causing your heart to throb for a different reason as you suddenly realized the proximity of the two of you. You stepped back so fast that your head spun. At least, you hoped that was why your head was spinning,

“You can use my shower.” you said very abruptly as you turned away from him,gesturing him to follow you to your bedroom.

Your bedroom. Your hear throbbed once more. Deep down, you hoped that you were about to have a heart attack or something; however, something  within you told you that that probably was not the case. You swallowed hard.

What the fuck was happening?

‘KNOCK kNOCK KNOCK’

The next morning you found yourself stirring awake to a loud succession of banging. Your eyes fluttered open for a moment only before they snapped back shut. The magnet drawing them together and you closer to sleep was much stronger than whatever noise was trying to wake you up, “Mhmfmfm…” you muttered as you rolled over on the couch and pulled the blanket over your head.

Izuku, however, was not one to ignore such an obvious noise and he found himself trudging off of the other sofa he slept on to answer whoever was banging on the door.

‘KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!’

“Coming!” the green haired man tiredly called out as he launched himself toward the front door and swung it open.

The astounded face on the other side of the entrance soon mirrored his own.

“Kacchan!” Izuku exclaimed.

Bakugou’s shocked expression very quickly contorted into one of pure rage, “What the hell is going on here?!” He screamed causing you to jolt awake as you threw the blanket over your head. You found yourself fumbling up as Bakugou continued to scream pointed to Deku, “The fuck is he here for??”

You made your way over to the two men- one seemingly terrified, and the other obviously enraged. As your head began lifting from the daze of sleep, you crossed your arms and glared at Bakugou, “He spent the night helping me with something,” you shook your head, trying to free yourself from the oncoming headache, “Hey, better question: why are you here?”

Bakugou seemed to swallow his own tongue as his jaw clenched shut, “I wanted to… uh…” he glared at the ground as he tried to find his next words. Shit. why was this so fucking hard? He should have never listened to that Shitty Hair and come over here. Bakugou scoffed to himself before redirecting his stern gaze back toward you, “Come with me.”

You could only blink.

What kind of caveman talk…You tilted your head as you fleetingly threw a confused glance toward Deku, who only shrugged in response.

Bakugou quickly grew tired of yours and Dekus silent conversation, “You wanna hang out or not??” he growled before throwing another heated finger toward Deku,  “And he can’t come.”

“I was just heading out anyways. It’s no big deal really!” Izuku defensively threw his hands up as if to show Bakugou that he was no threat at all. He went to gather a few of his belongings from the sofa he slept on before throwing Bakugou one more gaze-- this one a lot more astute.

A majority of Midoriya’s mind told him that there was nothing to worry about at all, but there was still a small section of him that couldn't shake the memories of how Bakugou treated him as a quirkless child. Izuku knew that he would never hurt you! But… just in case…

“You take care of her Kacchan,” the tone came off pleadingly but the look in his eyes was a  bit stern. You had never seen this portion of Deku before and it almost instantly caused your chest to thud, harshly reminding you of last night’s sensations. Shit.

“Don't tell me what the fuck to do, Deku. Those are my kids in there. Not yours. You just remember that,” Bakugou scoffed, causing Izuku’s expression to falter ever so slightly before he fixed it again.

Your jaw dropped at the sheer bluntness of his statement, “Kacchan, what the f--”

“I guess you’re right, Kacchan,” Izuku began, “Sorry if  I crossed a boundary,” he smiled at Bakugou-- who only huffed in return-- and quickly turned to you, making the tightness in your chest worse, “Bye, Y/N!” Izuku smiled, almost too innocently, considering the raging war in your gut at the moment.

You smiled back-- a feeble attempt at masking the inner turmoil ravaging your insides. “Peace, bb,” you gave him a weak hug before gesturing him out of your home. You threw him one final smile before shutting the door. You instantly whipped your head back around the the blonde brat behind you, “What. The. Fuck!?”

“I already told you. I want to hang out.”

“Are you fucking allergic to texting or some shit??” you yelled, “You just waltz in like you own the damn place and demand me to ‘Ohhh ahhh wo-man! come with me, wo-man’,” you renacthed his prehistoric behavior. 

Bakugou felt his muscles tighten in response to your taunting. Your loud nature, mixed with the confrontational behavior was reminding him way too much of his own mother. He swore on his life that he would never end up with  a woman like her and yet, here he was standing in front of her fucking carbon copy. The thought made him sick as he groaned in frustration,

“Shitty hair was fucking wrong!” Bakugou spat, causing your eyebrows to furrow in confusion as he continued, “The last thing I want to do is hang out with a bitching hag like you!!”

Your jaw dropped, “Excuse me??” You have heard pretty much every other insult in the book hurdled at you, but ‘hag’ was never one of them. You laughed, “I wasn’t a hag when you fucked me all night, huh?!”

“Yeah? I don't know what was wrong with me then. You are way different when I am not pumped full of alcohol, apparently.”

Your laughter immediately ceased, “Whatever. you came up to me and confessed your love like a raging SIMP, and now all of a sudden I’m a bitch?

“Fuck! Well, I got to know you past a pretty, stupid, fucking face!”

You blinked in shock. The unfamiliar feeling of your heart sinking into the pit of your stomach overwhelmed you as hurt surrounded your face. Practically your entire life, being beautiful has been a mask of sorts for your overwhelming failures. Still, here this man was-- practically a stranger-- seeing past your facade, looking directly into the steaming pile of shit that you truly were. Your eyes suddenly became warm as tears filled them,

“Then why the fuck are you even here, asshole?? TO PISS ME OFF?” you shouted, throwing your hands by your side and clenching them so tightly that your nails dug into your skin.

“BECAUSE  I WANTED TO KNOW ALL OF YOU!” he screamed back. The shocking words fled out from under his harsh tone and stunned you as your brain processed them. You felt your fist unfurl a bit as he continued, “I wanted to know you. Good and bad. Bitchy and not. You're carrying my children… I want to know them,” he finished, almost defeated. This tell of emotion was obviously the last thing he wanted to be doing, you could tell.

Still, it meant a  lot for some reason that he felt that he could do this with you “Oh,” you breath out, unable to articulate much else.

“Oh?!” he angrily repeated. Bakugou felt his face shrivel in disgust. He just poured out his being to you once more for you to trample on it like a fucking gymnast mat. However, as Bakugou formed his mouth to say something else, you halted him,

“Go… have a seat,” you gestured to the couch, blinking the accumulating liquid in your eyes away. The blond could only shoot a lone eyebrow up in response, causing you to sigh in exasperation,  “Well, Are you just gonna stand there looking like that, or what?” he gave you one final scoff before making his way to one of your couches and seating himself comfortably, propping one of his feet on your coffee table as he glared at the non functioning television.

“Welcome, I guess. I am sure you’ll have no issue making yourself comfortable,” you deadpanned, eyeing his propped up legs,  “I’ll go make us some… tea?” you suggested , but no answer came from him, “Tea it is.”

You rolled your eyes before trudging away. You always loved green tea, but for some reason the smell had been killing you lately, so you opted for peppermint tea instead. It was inferior by, far, but it matched the inferior, pathetic life that you had adopted recently.

Jeez. How much self deprecation can you fit into one week? Would this have any effect on the babies? If so, they’d probably come out singing RnB or some shit in the maternity ward. They’d have already stressed dyed hair and an entire Tumblr dedicated to sad aesthetics before they reached their first birthday, for god's sake.  

You vehemently shook your head to once again get rid of the oncoming headache that snuck in with these disgusting thoughts, “So Kacchan!” you called out as you walked back to the living room, “What do you wanna know?”

“Don’t call me that,” he simply barked.

“What?”

“Don’t call me that name. I fucking hate it.”

You snorted and took a seat next to his glaring figure. You tried not to notice how he shifted further away from you as you sat down, “I am sure Deku disliked being called worthless his whole life too,” you smirked up at him, “I bet he fucking hated it.”

The atmosphere seemed to once more shift into a much heavier tone after your statement and the room fell quiet for a few beats. Bakugou’s small glare morphed into a much more forced one. It was as if he was trying to use the glare to hide another feeling, you noticed.

Finally, he spoke, “How much do you know.”

You tilted your head into another shrug, “Enough to know that you probably hate the fact that I am quirkless.”

His face contorted into one of pure disgust as the glareful mask he wore faded away like yesterday’s lunch.  “I don’t give a fuck,” he argued, but the look you sent him showed no sign of believing it. Bakugou’s disgust deepened, but he made sure to control it enough to where you didn't know that it was directed towards himself.

“Oh really? Let’s see if you can keep that same energy when one of your kids pops out without that flashy quirk of yours,” Of course his face fell, just as you suspected it would. Just like it had for multiple other men you had told.

Most men’s pride utterly shrivels into dust as soon as the pretty girl in front of them-- the one that they fantasize about having a dream life with-- ends up telling them that they are quirkless. As soon as the words fall out of your mouth, the men's dreamy gaze effectively shatters alongside their hopes and dreams concerning you.

Nobody wants to pass weakness onto their children.

“You know what? I think I’ll go first,” you snapped him out of the uncomfortable, uncharacteristic silence, and he gave you an irritated, questioning glance, “You wanted to play 20 questions with me, or whatever. No limitations, okay? And I have the first question for you,” you explained before sending him a challenging gaze, “How could someone so full of hate truly aspire to be a hero?”

You expected him to blow up at you-- to scream, and yell and argue that you were wrong.

Yet.

The slightly apologetic, yet stern look on his face threw you for an absolute loop, “I wanted to win.” he simply answered. Somehow his matter of a factness was worse for you than any furious defensive scenario you had conjured in your mind, but as you went to open your mouth with a roll of your eyes, he halted you,

“That was when I was younger, “ he sharply clarified, “I wanted to win more than anything. To be better than everyone else—and that hasn’t changed but there's more to it now. I have to protect the people I care about—like my idiot roommates—I want to make sure we all come home safe by the end of the night.”

Once again he had thrown you off with a surprisingly normal non-caveman response, “That was actually…”

“My turn,” Bakugou abruptly cut you off, “How many men the you fuck this past few months?”

Your jaw dropped. 

And back to Neanderthal you mother fucking guess! “Are you fucking kiddin—”

“You said no limitations,” he gruffly stated.

You bit your tongue and shot him a glare that could match his own before giving a sharp sigh, “Four during the last year. You were the last and the only one during the month I… conceived,” you swallowed as the word left a bitter taste in your mouth, “My turn. What about you?”

“What.”

“How many women the past year?”

“Why the hell does it matter?” Bakugou argued. Your eyes shot down to his body as it shifted around even further from you. From his body language you could tell that his answer was sure to be outrageously high.

He was an extremely attractive guy after all. Those rippling arms were nothing to fuck around with. His red hot eyes could melt steel beams with a passing glance. The chisel of his permanently hardened expression could slice through even the most secured of panties. 

Yes. and there was no denying that he was a sex god in his own right.

It also didn't help that his temperament sucked, so you doubted he had had many long term relationships. He had all of the ingredients of a man whore stirring within him.

“I’m just curious,” you shrugged.

Bakugou threw his glare away from you for a moment as he contemplated on whether or not to answer your stupid question. He had his own questions to ask you still so he guessed that he didn't really have a choice if he wanted his answers,“...One.”

Your jaw dropped, “Seriously?” as his face fell into a furious shade of red you were smacked with a sudden realization,

“Kacchan, did you... lose your virginity to m...?” He glared even further away from you, but you could still see his ears falling even deeper into red-- effectively giving you your answer, “Oh my…” he trailed off. No wonder he was so fucking head over heels for you! Through your discomfort a horribly timed joke flew past your lips, 

“You knocked her up on the first try huh? You’ve got some super swimmers,” you half laughed, but Bakugou obviously didn't find anything funny about it as he snarled angrily as you,

“Shut up!” he barked, throwing a pillow at you, “My turn. What’s up with you and that shitty Deku?”

The pillow hit you, but it was really his question that had smacked you in the face. Your chest thudded, and you prayed to whoever was listening that he couldn't see the racing of your heart, “He’s just a friend! A really good friend to me. Probably my first actual friend ever,” you said this as a joke, but obviously forgot who you were talking to.

“You didn’t make any in high school?” Bakugou’s face twisted up disbelievingly.

“Never went. Couldn’t afford the tuition...” now it was you who was uncomfortably shifting from him. 

“Your parents didn’t help you out?”

“Slow down there, buckaroo,” you laughed, but his face remained as stern as ever as you continued, “That’s like three questions In a row for you. My turn.”

Luckily he caught the hint and didn't press upon the subject any further.

Through the night, you found out a lot of things about him. He was actually younger than you by a few years at twenty years old. His parents were both fashion designers (probably the biggest fucking shock to you considering his choice of black shirts and flannels) and that he was working on making his own hero agency since he had already climbed up the ranks in Japan.

Your game, however, was cut short by the growling of your stomach.

Bakugou almost immediately stood up, surprising you as he walked to your kitchen. Well, you did say ‘make yourself at home’ but this was a little upfront wasn't it? He soon yelled to you from the kitchen as you sat in shock still, “What do you have to eat in this shit hole?!”

Shit hole? You glance around at the decorations and clean atmosphere that you pride yourself on. That jerk. Your house was not a shit hole! “You can eat shit if you want. I’m not hungry.”

“The hell are you talking about? I just heard your stomach growling.”

You shrugged, “Just indigestion. I get a lot of stomach issues with these things inside of me,” the sudden clanging of pots and pan in your kitchen startled you,  “What the hell are you doing??” you called out before marching to your kitchen.

You found him rummaging through your cabinets, stopping momentarily to judgmentally eye your still plentiful liquor cabinet for a moment before moving on, “You can starve yourself all you fucking want, but you're not fucking starving my kids.”

Your breath hitched in your throat at his accusation, “I’m not starving.”

“You think I’m fucking blind?”

“I have to stay in shape for work. Just like you I am sure,” you walked up to him and grabbed a bicep for demonstration, but he quickly threw your hand away from him as his face fell into a bout of shock. He quickly regained himself,

“Whatever,” he grunted before swinging open your refrigerator.

“What are y—Hey!” you yelped as he began haphazardly throwing food onto one of your counters.

“Is all you have in here rabbit food? Jesus fucking Christ,” he ignored your cries and began throwing certain items together and heating up a pot of water.

You couldn't help but blink at the display. He seemed pretty natural in the kitchen and that in itself was unnatural considering his caveman persona, “You... cook?” you felt uneasy.

“You don’t?”

Honestly, your diet consisted of salads and ramen since you were 15, so cooking wasn't a necessity. You reluctantly shook your head at him.

He looked completely disappointed and disgusted with you but, hey, what else is new? Bakugou scoffed, “Well you’re gonna have to learn how now. Pay attention.”

You rolled your eyes at him. If you wanted fucking Gordon Ramsey bitching you around in the kitchen you would have clicked on that stupid ad that always popped up on your Youtube. Then again, Bakugou was more of a Guy Fieri with that spiky hair of his.

Whatever.

You guessed learning how to cook one meal wouldn't be too terrible,  

“What are you stirring the water for if you didn’t put anything in it yet?”

“It helps it heat up faster, idiot.”

“Do you actually throw the noodles on the wall to see if they’re finished?”

Bakugou threw you a frown, “If you’re a fucking dumbass,” he said, moving you aside as he began stirring a saucer filled with vegetables. He completely disregarded your yelp as he moved you as a parade of thoughts bombarded his mind.

He would have to come over more and keep you and his kids fed if you truly didn’t know how to cook. He scoffed and his stirring hand more slightly more erratically with frustration. What kind of grown woman didn't know how to cook pasta?

His thoughts were halted by a loud squelch that sounded through the air. He immediately threw his gaze up to the wall in front of his face and his expression fell at the sight. He growled, snapping his gaze back toward you by the pot of pasta, “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!” his furious glare danced between you and the wet noodle that stuck to the wall.

“I wanted to see if it would actually stick! Don’t get your balls in a twist, it was one noodle!”

“So damn wasteful,” Bakugou ground his teeth as he frustratedly scrapped the starchy pasta off of your wall. He opened his mouth to tell you just this, but immediately snapped it back shut as he felt something being thrown at his head, “that better not be what I think it is…” he snarled through his teeth as he eyed food dangling from one of the spines of his hair.

“Don’t worry, Kacchan. It’s not a worm,” you laughed, but your giddiness was soon cut off as a hot noodle was thrown back in your direction. You could only blink as it stuck itself on your nose.

“Hmph,” the corners of Bakugou’s lips slowly curled into a smirk, “It’s a good look on you, noodle face,” You laughed but once again was cut off. The brief sound of his laugh coinciding with your own shocked you.

His smile slowly died down as he caught wind of you gawking at him. He cleared his throat, “Are you done being a child? I’m ready to enjoy my good ass cooking.”

However, you didn't answer him as you once again found a smile creeping onto your face. He rolled his eyes and began making himself a plate of food, but he quickly grew tired of you smiling at him like some bimbo,

“What?!” He snapped, “You want another noodle to the face.”

You shook your head as you shuffled past him to serve yourself a plate, “No.. just you have a nice laugh.”

He scoffed, “That all you're eating?” he completely disregarded your comment but you decided to let it die too,

“I don’t see you with any food on your plate,” you shrugged, “I’d be more worried about yourself if I were you,” you winked at him before setting down at the table.

The night went pretty well after that. So well, in fact, that the two of you decided to have “parental meetings” every few days so that Bakugou could teach you how to cook. You ended up learning how to make 10 more dishes within the next three weeks.

Bakugou and you didn't exactly become close, but there were far less screaming matches than there had been in your first few meetings. You still didn't know him very well, but he wasn't necessarily a stranger anymore.

It was… nice.

The next check up came very quickly because of your lack of employment and your dates-- err um… “parental meetings” with Bakugou.

“Your twins should be about the size of avocados now! We’ll check again with a routine ultrasound. We do have the DNA tests in for you all so I’ll just go and run for those real quick.. well walk briskly. You don’t do an awful lot of running at my age.”

“I don’t do an awful lot of running now,” you joked, and Bakugou sent you a stern glare that screamed, ‘don’t encourage him.’ you shrugged as the doctor walked out of the room.

It was silent for what seemed like forever. You and Bakugou still weren't very good at sparking conversations, but eventually he spoke up as you laid back on the exam table, “You're really fucking showing now.”

You brows instantly came together, high fiving each other in your state of being roasted, “Thanks...” you deadpanned.

The look on your face sent a wave of hurt through the blond’s heart.

What the hell. It was like he felt your hurt. For the first time in a long time, Bakugou actually regretted his choice of words. He glared at the ground as he attempted to change the subject, “You’ve been eating, right?”

“How else Would I be sitting here, looking fat and talking to you, Kacchan.”

“I told you don’t call me that,” he paused, as if he were really considering his next statement, “Call me Katsuki,” he finally dragged out.

You rolled your eyes, “Okay, Kacchan.”

Just as Bakugou open his mouth the no doubt scream at you, Dr. Yamakawa entered the room, 

“Mama Bakugou! We have some really good news. Everything seems fine with the twins according to the DNA testing. One is a little small right now, but it’s completely normal for there to be a dominant twin so to speak. No genetic abnormalities or health concerns,” you saw Bakgou visibly stiffen at this before relaxing as the doctor continued, “’Cept for you.”

You shook your head, blinking heavily as if you’d just been punched in the brow, “Me?”

“You do have a concerning BMI—you tend to lean a little towards underweight. I understand you are in the profession of modeling correct,” he said very, curtly, “You need to add more calories to your daily intake. You wont need to ‘eat for three” as they say, but you do need to put on some substantial pounds or you will risk a premature birth..”

You had no fucking idea what to say to that. ‘Nice?’ ‘Cool beans.’ ‘fucking just give me the mother of the year award already!’ You felt your chest tighten and suddenly you realized you hadn't been breathing. You sucked in abruptly, causing the doctor to take a step towards you,

“You're looking a little flushed there, Mama Bakugou.”

“Well how else is she supposed to respond when you tell her like that, old man?!” Bakugou snapped, causing both you and the doctor to gawk at him. 

“Kacchan! What the fuck don’t talk to him like that, jerk!”

Bakugou scoffed, throwing his glare, much more pouty this time-- to the jar of cotton balls on the counter of the office.

“It wouldn't help either of you to sugar coat this, son,” the doctor sighed, “You have made it this far along in her pregnancy. Miscarriage is substantially less likely but if you want to give these babies a better chance, I’d suggest higher caloric intake.”

Needless to say, Bakugou did not leave the doctor's office that day a very pleasant man. He would angrily stalk ahead of you a for a few moments before pausing and grumbling about how ‘fucking slow’ you were as you caught up before the cycle would start all over again. You could only take this for so long, however,

“What!?” you yelled suddenly as the grumbling phase of his cycle began once more, “Will you stop fucking brooding already and speak your mind—”

He instantly snapped his face towards your own to stare into your eyes. You fumbled back a bit as the intense vermilion bore into you. You opened your mouth to speak but his serious expression exclaimed something before yours could,

“I wanna move in with you.”

You paused. You couldn't have fucking heard that right.

He… wants to...

“What…?” you mouthed.

Taglist:  @steggy4ever​ @library-trash​ @watevermelon​ @glimmadora-ble​ @persephones24​ @dragonempress123​ @your-pri-ncess @broken-from-fandoms​ @hot-pocket01​ @tsukineho @bakugousbabydoll​ @bubbzibubbles @ikebukuro-ghoul​ @thehoneycookiecrumbs​ @katsukis-sad-angel​ @dulcetailurophile​ @yukiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii @kanasakura @lonekitsune @pastel-prynce​ @mynameispurple​ @cutest-celestial-princess​ @minfani​ @aurorahoneybuns​ @galacticrosee @orokayagi​ @centerhabit​ @animefan7420 @katsukisposts   @bakugou-is-my-daddy

#bnha #mha #my hero academia #bnha x reader #mha x reader #bnha imagines #bnha imagine #mha imagine #mha imagines #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x reader #bakugou imagines #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou #baby boom

[salexectrian-heir]

messages from last night update

chapter below the cut | ao3 link

✧ Oracle ✧

SEPT 1ST 4:57 AM

[Joker] Hi

[Joker] Story time

[✧ Oracle ✧] i see yusuke returned ur phone

[Joker] Aha, yeah. After swearing on my life I would not make any more poor life choices

[Joker] I assume that was your doing

[✧ Oracle ✧] ur welcome

[Joker] Hmm well I might not have sworn hard enough

[✧ Oracle ✧] ???

[Joker] bet you 500 yen you can’t guess where I woke up this morning (without hacking my location)

[✧ Oracle ✧] oh god akira… jail?

[✧ Oracle ✧] again??!

[Joker] No

[Joker] Better

[✧ Oracle ✧] !!?

[Joker] On the catwalk of the auditorium

[✧ Oracle ✧] BRUH

[✧ Oracle ✧] didnt yusuke like walk u home???

[Joker] He did

[Joker] I just didn’t stay home after

[✧ Oracle ✧] (-_-;)・・・

[✧ Oracle ✧] but don’t they lock up the buildings at night….

[Joker] ...

[✧ Oracle ✧] also i’m p sure catwalks are at least fifteen meters in the air??

[Joker] ...

[Joker] I am surprisingly still very dexterous while intoxicated

[✧ Oracle ✧] o m g

[✧ Oracle ✧] what possessed u to sneak out of the dorm, pick a lock, scale scaffolding, and fall asleep on a metal beam is  / literally /  beyond me

[Joker] Me too, It's all very...fuzzy after getting back to the dorms

[Joker] Maybe I was a cat in a past life

[✧ Oracle ✧] cat!kira

[✧ Oracle ✧] congrats u now have a fursona to add to your growing list of ‘sonas

[Joker] Cat!kira go prrr?

[✧ Oracle ✧] HAHAH a self-drag?

[✧ Oracle ✧] Someone truly is hungover and regretting his life choices

[Joker] Jokes aside, all that flexibility training I did in hs apparently paid off

[Joker] I have no new bruises or injuries that I am aware of so I made it up in one piece. Somehow.

[✧ Oracle ✧] wait hold up I thot all that “training” u’d say u were doing was just like horny akira code for “going to mess around with Sumi after school”

[✧ Oracle ✧] don’t tell me u actually were doing gymnastics with her that whole time

[Joker] Okay

[✧ Oracle ✧] ????

[Joker] You literally just told me not to tell you

[✧ Oracle ✧] but was i right?! i NEED to kno if i was right

[Joker] Haha yes and no

[Joker] We did both

[Joker] is typing...

[✧ Oracle ✧] oKAY OKAY OKAY NO DETAILS (SAVE THOSE FOR ANN)

[✧ Oracle ✧] JUST CONFIRMATION THANK U next

[Joker] You have written fanfic more explicit than anything I could ever tell you I’ve done, AND I PROOF READ IT FOR YOU

[✧ Oracle ✧] ヽ(•//д//•)ノ [ok true]

[✧ Oracle ✧] but

[✧ Oracle ✧] ヽ(•̀//д//•́)ノ

[Joker] Ik Ik, I’m teasing. I won’t corrupt your virginal ears

[✧ Oracle ✧] /anyway/ people r gonna be mad jealous when they find out u dated an olympic gymnast

[Joker] She wasn’t one when we dated though so technically I didn’t

[Joker] She found out she qualified shortly before we went back to being just friends

[Joker] I think we’re both much happier this way

[✧ Oracle ✧] Obviously. you still talk to her??

[Joker] Yeah

[Joker] We caught up before the semester started

[Joker] She said she was nervous, but that’s to be expected when you’re on the global stage. Aside from that she’s fitting in really well with her new teammates. She just wishes Kasumi could have been a part of it

[✧ Oracle ✧] </3

[Joker] Yeah :( </3

[Joker] But she’s good

[Joker] Still calls me senpai though...which idk how to feel about that

[✧ Oracle ✧] lol its ~cute~

[Joker] Hmm leaning towards don’t think so

[✧ Oracle ✧] “oh ~senpai~ you’ll still watch me compete in the olympics on TV right?”

[Joker] ...did you listen in on the call

[✧ Oracle ✧] no

[Joker] “no,” she lied like a liar (I know you still have my phone bugged damn it)

***

The Phantom Thieves of Cats

SEPT 1ST 5:01 AM

[✧ Oracle ✧] *kicks down the door to the thieves den*

[✧ Oracle ✧] INARI U FAILED

[✧ Oracle ✧] GUESS WHERE AKIRA IS

[✧ Oracle ✧] (hint: not where he’s supposed 2 be)

[Fox] Preposterous! He was safely returned to his dorm room. I personally put him to bed.

[Panther] you stayed over in their dorm room Fox… isn’t he in there w/you??

[Fox] is typing...

[Fox] Ah. It appears that I am in his bed and Akira is indeed missing. I was on the floor when we went to sleep. I have no recollection of this transfer.

[Fox] I have awoken Ryuji but all he has done is throw his possessions at me in an attempt to silence my “pestering” so I do not think he will be of any help in this situation.

[Joker] Don’t bother with him Fox. He isn’t responsive until at least 9am after a night out.

[Joker] Also, why aren’t the rest of you sleeping?

[Panther] Joker! you’re alive!!! are you okay???????

[Joker] Define okay

[✧ Oracle ✧] *cackles*

[Panther] where are you?!?

[Joker] You aren’t going to guess?

[Panther] jail?

[Fox] Please let it not be true your detective arrested you last night, and you are suffering in incarceration as we type.

[Joker] Why is jail everyone’s first guess? I was only arrested once!

[Joker] Fuck

[Joker] Also, he is not “my” detective

[Fox] is typing…

[✧ Oracle ✧] u sure about that

[Joker] Oh no

[✧ Oracle ✧] pls reread our messages from last night

[Joker] Oh GOD

[✧ Oracle ✧] *cackles louder*

[✧ Oracle ✧] i can’t wait to hear what inari is about to dish out

[Panther] wait what did akira say to you @ ✧ Oracle ✧?!

[Joker] Futaba please *softly* don’t

[Fox] Last night I had to relieve you of your phone before you texted the detective prince incriminating evidence of your state of inebriation and infatuation. You were adamant that you had to send him a picture of a cat as a token of your feelings, which I objected as the image you selected was not flattering of the cat. I may have just met you a few days ago, so please tell me if I am overstepping my bounds, but I do not think sending hideous pictures of cats is a wise way of winning over this man’s affections.

[✧ Oracle ✧] pls show us the picture he wanted to send

[Fox]

[Panther] Hahahah oh akira

[✧ Oracle ✧]

[Joker] …

[Joker] I’ll be staying at this undisclosed location until further notice

[Panther] no Akira!!! seriously where are you??

[Joker] the_view_is_nice.image

[Panther] :O

[Panther] how did you get up that high???

[✧ Oracle ✧] gymnastics training

[Panther] huh? i didn’t know you were a gymnast Akira!!

[✧ Oracle ✧] im sure he’ll tell u all about it now

[Joker] -____-

[Fox] I cannot believe I failed my first mission as the Chosen One.

[✧ Oracle ✧] i can

[Fox] is typing…

[Panther] @ ✧ Oracle ✧!!!!!!

[✧ Oracle ✧] kek

[Fox] I am an utter disgrace to this friendship. How can I even call this a friendship when I have done nothing but leech from the kindness you all have bestowed upon me. How will I ever be able to show my face among you,  those whom I have failed. I must atone for the shame I have wrought.

[Joker] You didn’t fail @ Fox, and you are not a disgrace. It was my fault. I was the shitty friend in this situation. I’ll make it up to everyone, and to you Fox. I’ll think of something.

[Fox] Food would suffice.

[Joker] Dinner for a week it is.

[Fox] Delightful!

[Panther] wow he got over that fast

[✧ Oracle ✧] welcome to being friends with Inari, the path of forgiveness is through his stomach

***

✧ Oracle ✧

SEPT 1st 5:07 AM

[Joker] Slight problem

[Joker] I actually have no idea how to get down

[✧ Oracle ✧] u really r part f*cking cat

***

Regrettably, some of his life choices last night did him no favors.

Mistakes had been made. Limits and Lessons had been learned. Unfortunately the hard way.

After miraculously finding a way down off the catwalk without injury  into his dorm shower and a fresh set of clothes, Akira managed to show up for his opening shift at Big Bang Blends ten minutes early.

Haru took one look at him when he slinked into the kitchen and immediately said, “Oh dear.”

Akira spun a damp curl around his finger. “That bad, huh?”

“Uhm.” Haru offered him a wobbling, pitiful smile. “You kind of look like how I would imagine a cat that got caught outside in the rain might feel.”

He let out a self-deprecating chuckle and wandered over to the apron rack. “Fair comparison.” Selecting his off its hook, he pulled it over his head. “I’d add on that the cat also got stuck in a tree and developed a splitting migraine.”

“I know just the thing that’ll sort you out!” Haru hovered over to Akira’s side. “Whenever I--” she paused, considering her words with a finger to her lip, “overindulge,” she settled on with a giggle, “I’ll make myself a cup of my special tea. It instantly clears my head and calms my stomach.”

Akira’s stomach rolled unpleasantly. “ Special tea ?”

Haru nodded vigorously. “It works like a charm! And I’m not just saying that because I drink it, I have a friend--well, I might be overstepping if I were to call him that, we aren’t that close,” Haru sighed, “but I make it for him too when he occasionally stumbles in here in a similar state.”

“Do I want to know what’s in it?” he asked hesitantly.

Haru beamed brightly at him. “No.”

Akira groaned.

“I promise it’ll work,” Haru said, wandering out of the kitchen and over to her collection of loose leaf teas that were displayed in clear, sealed jars behind the counter. She called back to him, “You’ll perk up in no time!”

He gave her a weak thumbs up.

Picking up the task list from the side of the walk in freezer, he resigned himself to his fate of ingesting whatever the fuck concotion Haru was going to feed him. It couldn’t have been worse than what he drank last night. In all honesty, he would have been feeling way, way, worse if Yusuke hadn’t convinced him to drink so much water when they got back. Akira would like to think the fact he wasn’t curled up on the floor in the fetal position on the cafe floor was also thanks in part to the Amazake he had chosen to drink the night prior too. But the thought of the non-alcoholic sake made his stomach churn harder so he stopped that train of thought immediately, and focused on setting up the dining area.  His head felt like it weighed five pounds heavier than it usually did, which made moving it a bit of a hassle, but he had the opening sheet to finish before the cafe opened and he’d damn himself if he didn’t deliver.

What his stomach did seem safe to think about was luck stats, and that maybe Futaba was onto something when she had made that off hand comment in their chat last night. Akira was incredibly lucky to have landed two bosses ( three if he counted Sojiro but the man was more like a father than he ever was a boss) who cared more about his well being as a person than as a source of cheap labor. Watching Haru make his tea as he flipped chairs down off the tables only amplified his guilt of showing up before her utterly and unmistakably hungover.

Being the sloppy friend did not sit well with Akira.

He swore to himself as he pushed in the last chair he took down that this was the first and last time he ever did anything as stupid and irresponsible as he did last night. Not to mention, his luck wouldn’t last if he kept this up. He’d make it up to everyone somehow, and Haru in particular now. He wouldn’t let his current state impact his work.

And once he stopped feeling like dogshit and could form a coherent argument, he was going to have a long, hard talk with whichever one of his personas decided it would be great fucking idea to drink so much, scale the interior of the theatre, and fall asleep on a steel beam no greater than sixty centimeters in width. Because honestly, what the fuck ?

Even In high school, his “peak stupidity” years, he hadn’t done anything as dumb as this.

Okay, well, that was a lie.

He had done a lot of stupid, often illegal things (see: petty theft, breaking and entering) in high school that to him, had been justified. He was quite gifted at stealing and knew his way around a lock with professional proficiency, and he had gotten away with it unscathed for a very long time.

Except for the whole getting arrested and put on probation thing , which ironically had been for a crime he didn’t actually commit.

“It’s ready!”

“Thanks, Haru.”

Akira swung by the to-go counter reaching for the mystery tea waiting for him and continued on.

After thirty minutes of sipping on whatever miracle cure Haru brewed as he checked off the morning set up tasks, it fucking kicked in. The mind fog and nausea disappeared almost entirely, settling his stomach enough that he was able to keep down some Advil and melon pan with Haru for breakfast. Akira could handle the headache until the medicine took over.

He just couldn’t move too fast or too sudden (Akira was still a little too off balance for that), or turn his neck sharply (thanks to what he had drunkenly decided to use as a pillow the night before). But he powered through it as he set about stocking the various coffee beans in their containers.

The last item on the task sheet they completed together. Prepping the food items for the pastry case with all of the baked goods Haru had made the night before. In addition to mochi, goma dango, and other pastries one would expect to enjoy with tea and coffee, there was always some kind of cake. Meticulously and lovingly decorated, sliced by hand that Haru showcased in her cake display. Today’s selection was a daring one, a pink lemonade cake with delicately applied ombre pink frosting and topped with candied lemon slices that were evenly spaced, each sitting on an artful dollop of whipped white icing.

“Did you want to try a piece, Akira-kun?”

Akira glanced over from where he was sliding a tray of nerikiri into the case. A plate with a modest slice was being extended to him. Eyeing the color up close, his stomach protested. Apparently still a little too hungover to test the limits of his digestive tract with such an extravagant confection.

“It looks amazing, but I think I’ll stick to the melon pan this time Haru.”

“I can always save it for la--”

A sharp series of knocks interrupted their conversation.

From his position squatting on the floor, he checked the time on his phone. There were still five minutes until the cafe officially opened for the day. Haru had warned him there were always a few people who showed up early and failed to read the sign.

“I’ll get it,” Akira sighed, sliding the door of the pastry case shut. “You finish with the cake. I’ll handle our impatient caffeine addict.”

“Oh don’t worry the cake’s all done, I just cut the last slice.” Haru waved Akira off. “I can get him.”

Him?

He hastily straightened up, brushing a few stray sugary crumbs off his apron and immediately looked over at the entrance. Every muscle in his body seized up. Waiting outside the glass doors was one impeccably dressed and restless looking Akechi Goro. Akechi rolled his shoulder, adjusting the strap of his messenger bag while he checked his phone.

The message Akira sent Akechi last night intrusively echoed in his head the moment the former detective looked up and locked eyes with him. Pocketing his phone into his suit jacket (it had to be custom fit, because there was no way it could have cut his figure that well without tailoring), he lifted his chin ever so slightly. Akechi’s expression twisted wickedly into something that short circuited Akira’s brain.

Oh.

Fuck .

A war waged between two primal instincts in Akira’s body at the sight, the overwhelming urge to run in the face of danger clashing with a tidal wave of lust. The rush coursed through his veins, freezing him in place. Much like prey that had been cornered, his heart began to thrash against his ribs.

Akechi’s grin was sharp and salacious, a stark contrast to the innocent and winsome smile that the T.V. ready Prince so often wore. Akira didn’t know him all that well (... yet ), but God , that smile just seemed to suit Akechi so much better.

Akira got to witness this side of Akechi knowing it was reserved for only him for about two whole seconds before Akechi’s face changed, shifting into his composed, manufactured doll-like mask when Haru made it over to let him in.

The transformation gave Akira something pretty close to whiplash.

Really arousing whiplash.

“Good morning Akechi-san,” she greeted him, holding the door open with a warm smile.

“And same to you, Okumura-san,” he returned politely, stepping past her and into the cafe proper. “Pardon my early arrival, I have quite the busy day planned unfortunately and was hoping to get a jump start.” He brushed aside a few strands of hair that had fallen into his eyes with a gloved hand. “I hope your morning has been going well.”

“It’s barely started,” Akira muttered, reaching for a to-go cup to start Akechi’s order to busy himself with so he wouldn’t stare at the breathtakingly handsome man in front of him. His heart needed a break already.

Instead of writing Akechi’s name, he doodled a pair of handcuffs with the bold letters A and G within the negative space in each cuff (Akira admired his work for a brief moment and thought Yusuke would be proud). He marked the drink as a caramel latte, recalling what Haru had put down on his cup yesterday. Then proceeded to make a pour over instead.

Haru flipped the sign to open, and then said, “Very well, so far! I tried out a new cake recipe, you have to try it.”

Akechi laughed, and Akira’s stomach clenched--but this time in an all too pleasant way. Akira diverted his attention from grinding the beans for his drink to watch the detective ( Fuck! ) The sound was light and lyrical, and after what Akira witnessed… sounded totally out of place coming out of the same mouth that had held that smug, voracious grin a moment ago.

“As much as I would love to, I must decline. I cannot get into the habit of having cake for breakfast.”

“Then you must take a slice with you!” Haru walked past him and over to her cake display, lifting the glass lid and taking a piece out.

“Alright, if you insist,” Akechi conceded, coming to a stop in front of Akira, who moved on to scooping the grounds into the damp filter. The proximity made it near impossible to keep his eyes off the detective, but Akira somehow managed it, forcing himself to pay attention to his pour.

“Actually, would you mind if I borrowed your barista for a moment, Okumura-san?”

Akira snapped his head up from his preparations and met Akechi’s eyes once more ( God damnit! ). Which was a really dumb idea as a shock of pain spiked down his neck. He bit the inside of his cheek to stop from wincing.

A dangerous glint appeared in that maroon gaze that catapulted Akira’s thundering heart into his throat.

“Is he in trouble?” Haru peered over her shoulder from where she was packing a bright pink slice of cake into a to-go container.

“He might be,” Goro murmured just loud enough for Akira to hear, then broke their eye contact to address Haru, “I assure you, nothing of the sort.” He smiled that infuriatingly fake smile at her, complete with an innocent tilt of his head. “I just need to ask him a few questions, in private.”

Haru shot Akira a questioning stare, Do you need me to say no?

He shrugged nonchalantly, or as nonchalantly as someone who was having a very intense internal meltdown over an insanely attractive man could, and said, “It’s fine, Haru.” He continued to pour the scalding water in a circular motion over the coffee grounds in the filter, doing his best to quiet all the alarm bells in his head.

His response must have come off convincingly enough because Haru nodded and said, “Well, I can’t see why that would be a problem.” She hesitantly returned Akechi’s smile. “But I will need him back in a bit when the morning rush hits.”

“This shouldn’t take too long,” Akechi turned and gestured to a table in the corner of the cafe--far away enough from the counter that Haru couldn’t possibly overhear their conversation. Then under his breath he added, “As long as Kurusu-kun doesn’t resist, that is.”

Akira cleared his throat, willing his throbbing heart to drop back into its cage between his ribs. “Go on, I”ll join you when I’m finished.”

Akechi nodded, leaving the yen for his coffee on the counter and sauntered away. Akira topped off the pour over and transferred the liquid into the to-go cup. On his way around the counter he snagged what was left of his miracle tea and took a swig. He hoped it would replenish his mental reserves to handle the upcoming verbal sparring match he was sure he was about to walk into.

Akechi, in his immaculate glory, was leaning back in his chair languidly with one dark clad leg crossed. He watched Akira closely as he wandered over with their drinks. Akira suddenly felt incredibly out classed and underdressed in his usual cardigan-v neck combo he had going on compared to Akechi’s tan suit jacket and pressed button down shirt.

He slid into the seat opposite Akechi and pushed his coffee across the table. Akechi nodded in thanks and brought it to his lips.

Akira pretended he didn’t watch the way Akechi’s throat moved as he swallowed his first sip.

The detective hummed approvingly. “Black.”

“The way you actually like it,” Akira said with a knowing smile. “Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me.”

“Is it now,” Akechi chuckled darkly against the lid still pressed to his lips. “Sadly, my coffee preferences are the extent of where your knowledge of me ends.”

In the tenuous silence that descended after that statement, they sipped at their respective drinks. Gazes not once wavering off one another.

“I assume you know why I’m here,” Akechi finally said, cutting the tension.

“When I said ‘come get me ’ I didn’t mean ‘corner me at work ’,” Akira hissed over his cup of miracle tea.

He could think of many other, far more superior places he would have loved to be cornered by Akechi in. But Akira kept that part to himself.

The detective leaned forward, resting his chin on his fist. “You do realize if this were a real investigation and I caught you as unaware as you were this morning, you being at work with your Boss present wouldn’t have deterred me.”

Akira stole a glance at Haru, who was busy writing the specials of the day on their blackboard, then drained the rest of his tea.

Akechi followed his gaze and continued on in a saccharine tone that contradicted the alluring smile his mouth had split into again, “But since it’s not, I highly doubt you want an audience for when I bend you over the counter and take what I want from you.”

Akira promptly choked.

Any lingering doubt Akira may have had about Akechi’s preferences evaporated. Akechi knew exactly what he was saying. He had to have, right? There was no heterosexual explanation for that response.

Point to Akechi, he thought, accepting the fact his face was probably as red as the flowering plant hovering three inches above his head.

“How considerate,” Akira managed to rasp once he got his tea to go down his throat correctly. Swallowing burned like a bitch. Now he had to deal with a sore throat on top of the rebellion being staged by his heart and stomach, and the leftover vertigo from his hangover.

“Will you hand it over now?” the detective asked with a hint of sugar coated venom.

“Hate to disappoint, but you’ll be walking away empty handed this morning. I left it in my room.”

Which wasn’t a lie. In his haste to recover from last night’s  escapade and get to work on time, he hadn’t thought to grab the handkerchief. The last thing he expected was this.

“I think you’re sending me mixed signals.”.

“Am I?”

“You tell me you want one thing, then act like you didn’t expect it to come to fruition when I follow through on it so I’m curious,” Akechi titled his head and his hair shifted, shining ethereally in the early morning sun streaming through the window. “What is it you really want, Kurusu?”

For you to fuck my brains out, Akira thought. But admitting that so bluntly to Akechi’s face felt like defeat. So, he kept the stupid illusion of their game going and leaned in.

“I want to see if the Detective Prince is really as good at his job as the rumors say he is.” Akira mirrored the detective’s head tilt and offered him a crooked grin. “I won’t be that easy.”

“If you want me to physically remove it from your person, then I must insist from this point forward you carry it with you. If every time I corner you, you… aren’t ready,” Akechi’s smile grew wider, “then doesn’t that defeat the purpose? And unlike you it seems, my time and attention is limited.”

“Rude.” Akira mimicked the detective’s posture, dropping his chin into his palm. “My time is limited too. I just can’t have you stalking me at work. And--” what Akira really meant to say next was , I cannot possibly work and retain my sanity with you watching me like that all the time. But instead said, “--Think of Okumura-san’s business. You’ll scare away her customers.”

Akechi shot him an unimpressed look. “Somehow I highly doubt that.”

Wow. Cocky bastard.  

"Well,” Akira said, changing tactics by imbuing a little bit of truth, “I imagine you can relate to not wanting to be distracted at work, with your fans and all.”

“They can be...rather inconvenient at times, yes.” Akechi studied him intently. “Alright then. Let’s make a deal.”

“Making a deal with the enemy? Akechi,” Akira feigned a gasp, “don’t tell me you’re a dirty cop.”

The detective snorted into his coffee. “I’m going to choose not to entertain that comment and suggest we establish some ground rules.”

“I thought rules didn’t exist in investigations,” Akira said mischievously.

“Like I previously stated, good thing this isn’t one, then?”

They shared a private smile.

“I propose this,” Akechi said, straightening up, hands clasped on the table. “From this point on, you will carry it on your person. I will catch you off guard within the next two weeks and take back what is rightfully mine. Our working hours are exempt from this. Obviously, the common spaces in the dormitory will be too by default. Should you ever need me as your RA, that will come first and foremost, I take my duties seriously. As should you. I think you’ll find these terms agreeable and respectful of each other’s time. Unless there are any other locations you want to deem off limits.”

Akira made a show of considering Akechi’s words, tapping a finger against his cheek. This was literally the most drawn out, intellectually charged foreplay Akira had ever engaged in but he couldn’t say it didn’t excite him. In fact, there was something exhilarating about it.  

“No. Everywhere else is fair game.”

“Really?” Akechi inquired, grin breaching that rapacious territory again. “Be careful what you agree to, Kurusu.”

Akira shrugged and leaned back.

“So,” Akechi prompted, “you won’t say no, will you?”

Of course he was going to accept. So Akira simply said, “I think I’ll hold on to your handkerchief.” And then held out his hand. It felt like the right thing to do.

“Hah, excellent,” Akechi smiled and shook it firmly. The leather was soft and warm as it dragged against Akira’s palm. “Otherwise, I will be forced to order a room inspection and somehow I doubt that is how you want this to play out.”

“If you are inspecting the room while I’m in it, then I might be.”

Right after the words left his mouth, the logical part of his brain that wasn’t stuck on being hungover and horny on main finally spoke up and reminded him of the very important, expulsion worthy, major cockblock that was currently being housed in his room: Morgana.

But then Akechi’s mouth upturned devilishly, and suddenly Akira decided he’d cross that furry bridge when he got to it.

“Well, then. I must be off. Thank you for the coffee,” Akechi said, dropping Akira’s hand as he stood up. “I have an interview taping in…” he checked his phone and sighed, “just over an hour. Hopefully the trains are on schedule.”

Akira tilted his head. “Still doing those?”

“Yes, keeping up appearances on behalf of the precinct,” Akechi explained, “I may be officially on hiatus as a full time student, but I still pick up cases from time to time. The media wants to know how I balance it all.”

“Ah. Explains the get up.”

Akechi bristled at the comment, his nose wrinkling ( cute! ) and brows drawing down as he straightened his already perfectly straight tie. “What’s wrong with my outfit?”

“Nothing,” Akira teased with a lilt in voice, “It’s nice, maybe a little stuffy.” He deliberately looked Akechi up and down. “But I bet you’d look better out of it, judging by what I saw you wear the last time you showed up here.” He couldn’t fight the coy smile his mouth twisted into even if he tried. “If you’re looking to show off, those shorts from yesterday would do a better job.”

The call out was meant to fluster Akechi, but the detective’s face remained remarkably even toned. Flawless even. Too flawless.

Could he be... he's totally wearing makeup.

Akira lifted a brow pointedly.

That did the trick, earning Akira a heated glare before Akechi turned his head sharply away. The movement roughly shifted the hair around his face, revealing a sliver of skin previously hidden. To Akira’s rapidly dawning delight, the detective’s neck was rapidly turning pink.

“Shut. Up. Kurusu.”

Oh, so Akechi blushes all the way down when he’s flustered. Fascinating. Akira filed the thought away for… later.

For totally innocent purposes.

Totally.

Akira stood up and slipped in front of Akechi, demanding to be looked at. Giddy with his new discovery. “Oh? What’s this? He can dish it out but can’t take it?”

Akechi’s eyes flashed as he brought himself up to his full height, and stepped into Akira’s space. Scowling down the few centimeters he had on him, he forced Akira to take a step back. “You,” he said lowly, continuing to move forward, making Akira walk backwards until his back hit the counter, “are a brat .”

“Just figuring that out now, detective?” Akira smirked. “I thought that was obvious.”

From this close Akira could see just how gorgeous the detective’s eyes truly were. Flecks of light red dotted the center most part of his eyes, giving off the illusion of glittering in the light. He was close enough that if Akira leaned in a fraction more their noses would touch.

A very polite, soft cough came from somewhere on Akira's right.

The detective’s eyes widened in shock. He quickly put space between them again and turned to face Haru, who was standing in between the kitchen and the counter area looking anywhere but at them.

Akira owed her now a second apology.

“I wish both of you a good day,” Akechi gracefully recovered and turned on his heel. He flexed his shoulders as he opened the door but stopped with one foot out the door.

“Oh, and Kurusu-kun?” Akechi turned halfway to face him, “Be sure to check your email this afternoon.”

And then he was gone.

***

It’s Always Snack Time in Tokyo

SEPT 1ST  8:00 AM

[Takuto Maruki] Hello! I was going to wait until I saw you in person, but I can’t resist telling you the good news! I submitted the paperwork to bring on an official research assistant. The chair of the department should grant me an answer by the end of the week. The position is yours once I get the documented approval.

[Takuto Maruki] That is, if you are still interested in conducting research with me like you did over the summer

[Akira Kurusu] I am

[Takuto Maruki] Even more wonderful!

[Akira Kurusu] Won’t it be unethical if you don’t let other people apply for the position though?

[Akira Kurusu] You can’t play favoritism

[Takuto Maruki] I, fortunately, get to make the rules in this situation and I wrote that I could appoint the position to any student that met certain criteria and showed promise in the field

[Akira Kurusu] You literally wrote the position description so that only I fit that criteria, didn’t you

[Takuto Maruki] You would be correct! :D

[Takuto Maruki] So if you’re free and want to get a jump start on assisting, I was hoping to recruit you this upcoming Friday to proctor an exam.

[Akira Kurusu] An exam? The second week of class? Savage Sensei

[Takuto Maruki] It is a 300 level that meets M/W/F so the curriculum moves fast. This cohort in particular is grasping the concepts at a much faster rate than the other two I teach for this course.

[Akira Kurusu] When is it? I open the cafe Friday mornings

[Takuto Maruki] 2pm

[Akira Kurusu] Okay, I can make that work. I’ll be there

[Takuto Maruki] Wonderful! :)

***

The Phantom Thieves of Cats

SEPT 1st 11:12 AM

[Skull] yo i am not back readin any of that

[Skull] wat did i miss?

✧ Oracle ✧  Changed Skull to Edgelord Can’t Read

[Edgelord Can’t Read] I CAN EFFIN’ READ!!!

[Edgelord Can’t Read] i said i wasn’t gonna, not that i cant big difference

[Edgelord Can’t Read] ur the one who cant read

[✧ Oracle ✧] wow gr8 comeback edgelord im so offended. what r we 7yrs old

[Edgelord Can’t Read] shuddup

***

Gotta Go Fast

SEPT 1st 11:28 AM

[Skull] BRO A CATWALK?! WTF?!?

[Skull] how the eff did u get down??

[Joker] My amazing cat-like reflexes

[Skull] bro

[Skull] how u feelin btw

[Joker] You know that feeling you get when you’re about to go over the hill on a rollercoaster?

[Joker] Like that

[Skull] oof

[Skull] ill make u my ma’s soup when ur shifts over, its the best for this kinda shit

[Joker] Why is everyone being so understanding with me today

[Skull] were ur friends man we gotchu

[Joker] alsdjflskf

[Skull] uh did the rollercoaster drop or smth

[Joker] Haha no

[Joker] Thanks Ryuji

***

The Phantom Thieves of Cats

SEPT 1st 2:01 PM

[Edgelord Can’t Read] UH HOLY SHIT EVERYONE CHECK UR EMAILS

[Panther] what?? why??

[✧ Oracle ✧] im surprised u even read ur email

[Joker] Oh.

[Joker] Fuck.

***

To: Shujin Hall_5th Floor

From: Akechi Goro; Niijima Makoto

CC: Kawakami Sadayo

Subject: Violation of Dormitory Rules

Dear Fifth Floor Residents of Shujin Hall,

This is a friendly reminder that there is a strict No Pets Policy in this Residence Hall. A contraband item, a can of pet food, was located on the floor inside the trash room on Friday night. As such, we will be conducting room inspections beginning tomorrow, starting with rooms located in the Girls’ Wing. Let this be an example to all that the consequences for violating this rule will be termination of their dormitory agreement and the loss of their on campus housing status. Any additional charges will be determined by the Residence Hall Director, Kawakami Sadayo.

If you have any further information on this subject, please feel free to contact us.

We hope you have a wonderful rest of your weekend.

Sincerely,

Your Resident Assistants

Akechi Goro

University of Tokyo | Class of 20XX Criminal Justice / Psychology Major | Philosophy Minor [email protected]

Niijima Makoto

University of Tokyo | Class of 20XX Criminal Justice Major | Psychology & Law Minor [email protected]

#akeshu #shuake #akeshuake #goro akechi #persona 5 royal #persona 5 #akira kurusu #goro akechi x akira kurusu

[rokutouxei]

the wonder that’s keeping the starts apart

ikemen vampire: temptation through the dark theo van gogh / mc | T | [ ao3 link in bio ]

The challenge seemed pretty simple: to try to befriend the university bookshop's most sour employee, Theo van Gogh. As a literature major with a boatload of book recommendations on her back, it ought to be a simple task indeed. But as she uncovers what lies between Theo's pages, the more she finds it harder to become closer to him without having to put the feeling directly into words. What can she learn from Theo about what it means to stay—and how can she teach Theo about what it means to let go? | written for ikevamp big bang 2020!

[ masterpost for all chapters ]

CHAPTER 4 OF 22

She is… persistent.

The kind of persistent that would be inspiring if the persistence wasn’t pointed in his direction. Theo isn’t anti-social—he’s not the kind of person who would purposefully avoid conversation or hide from people, because he knows that, especially with his major, building networks is a thing. 

But she’s different, because it’s not like she’s doing it for any sort of plus or gain on her end—at least in Theo’s mind—so he doesn’t quite understand why she’s like this.

“Do you have a favorite book?”

“What’s your favorite food?”

“Why’d you decide to work at Dragon’s Hoard?”

“What’s it like being a business major?”

She asks just a handful of questions in a day, as if not to scare him off. But she makes the most out of his patience. She sits there, the book he’s lent her in her hand, a finger stuck between the pages to mark where she was last at. She gives an answer for every question she gives, as

“Me? Man, I wouldn’t be able to pick a favorite book…”

“I really like Japanese food, actually, but…”

“Hmm, I’m thinking of getting a part-time too, so…”

“It’s prettier on paper. Everything is prettier on paper in the lit department…”

Something about her persistence reminds him of Vincent, in a mirrored way that he can’t quite put into words. She and Vincent both have something thrumming in their veins that pushes them forward. It’s something he doesn’t understand, because it’s never been like that for him.

So one day, he finally asks:

“Why me?”

“What?”

Theo asks it out of nowhere, and she looks up at him curiously from between the pages of Ocean Vuong.

“What do you mean, why you?”

“It is what it is.”

“Okay, mister vague-posting,” she rolls her eyes at him, but there’s a smile on her face. “I don’t know, really. You’re interesting, I guess.”

It’s not the eloquent answer he expected out of her, but he’s a little relieved it’s not anything more complex. He doesn’t know what he would done with that sort of information. “Glad to have been entertaining, then.”

 “What do you think of yourself, a shiny thing?” she says, laughing. “You’re just more than you show yourself to be, and that’s the fun part. I just might see through you, Theo.”

“You do not.”

“I do! You’re all barbs but Vincent calls you the sweetest thing and that’s all I need to know. Maybe I can even guess your favorite color.”

“That’s irrelevant.”

“Is it yellow?”

Theo didn’t have a favorite color. And even if he did, yellow might not be that high up on the list of contenders. But in that moment, he considers it: yellow, the color of Vincent’s hair, yellow, the rye fields of their home town, yellow, the color of childhood summers and painting in the backyard, yellow, the colors on their bedroom wall.

Maybe this silly girl was right. Maybe yellow could be his favorite.

“Lucky guess, hondje,” he says, instead, watching the sun blossom, bright yellow, on her face.

--

“You’re trying to justify a friendship with a guy who called you a dog?” he asks, tucking beautifully-tinted violet hair behind his ear. “You deserve better, Toshiko-san.”

It’s late afternoon, and she’s sitting in the gazebo near the Arts Building, the small, undignified hangout spot of the school’s already tiny literary club. Her friend and senior, Dazai, sits across from her on the table with his glasses on, squinting at her in confusion.

Dazai graduated a bit back, being two years older than her, but he’s still studying under the department.  For some reason or another that she could not comprehend, he decided to take his MA in Japanese Literature here as well. One shared intensive writing workshop class with him has made them good friends.

“Called? No, present tense. He calls me a dog,” she corrects, shaking her head as she finally lifts her head up from the book she is highlighting. “I mean, he uses my name… sometimes… rarely… okay nearly never, but somehow he’s figured out calling me his puppy in Dutch is a good nickname.”

Dazai shakes his head. “Sounds like a fuckboy,” he comments, readjusting his glasses into place, as he flips his readings back to the right page. “Steer clear unless he has a huge cock, I guess?”

“Shut up, oh my god!” she exclaims, rushing over to cover his mouth with her hands. “No way, no way. He’s a business major, and I don’t want to be in a relationship with a business major of all things. Besides, there’s a better option than him in the same house. Does arts too.”

“Oh? Pray tell, who might it be?”

“His brother,” she whispers, conspiratorially, “is Vincent.”

Dazai blinks. There is a moment of silence before he can compose himself. “No way. Van Gogh? He has a brother? He’s still here?”

“Yes, him, the ‘genius of the College of Arts’, he ‘who haunts the hallways of the Fine Arts Department’, the professors’ favorite ‘artistic genius’,” she rattles off, having memorized the rumors with how many times she’s heard it. “The only reason I know he’s still here is because it would have been huge news if he actually graduated.”

“Seven years in the shitty College of Arts? He’s some sort of masochist for sure,” he comments. She poses no comment to the fact that Dazai took his undergraduate studies here, too, and now he’s also doing his masters… here, too. “But you’re telling me the guy at Dragon’s Hoard is his brother? His brother is a business major?”

“Look, I know, I was surprised too,” she says. “I was already shocked enough that he was the friendly barista at the café when you told me… but to know they’re related? They’re like ice and fire.”

“Exact opposites, huh?”

“Either way, that’s the story of how I got into some sort of mini modeling gig and into a friendship that I did not expect or want,” she says, finally finishing her story, with a wave of her hand like a conductor at the end of a piece.. “I’m trying to make the most out of it, though.”

Dazai nods, but his face is full of disbelief. “Yes, by sticking around a guy who calls you a dog in his free time.”

“No nickname will stand between me and getting people to read some good old poetry.”

“That’s not the point, Toshiko-san, but if that’s what makes you happy.”

For a moment, the two of them return to their studies. She, turning back to the book she’s highlighting and annotating for a class tomorrow. Him, going back to his readings for tonight’s class. The College of Arts’ literary club used to be open to everyone, but after dwindling membership, it became one that was limited to the Department of Literature’s students—or, rather, all of the students are immediately made part of it, and could hang out at their said sad, lonely gazebo if they want. That didn’t make it any more popular, though, so she’s made it her and her friend’s little nook for studying when she’s not in the library.

“Say, what made Vincent a legend in the College of Arts?” she suddenly asks, just as she reached the end of a page. Dazai hums, finishing a passage he’s reading before looking up.

“Isn’t it because of his style?” Dazai answers, though hesitantly. “I’m sure the painting hanging in the Dean’s room is his.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure of that too, but…” she pauses, thinking of Vincent in his studio room, planning his paintings, the corkboard, and the canvases. “Why didn’t he just…get it over with? Why hasn’t he graduated? I’m sure there’s some sort of—apprenticeship or studio that’ll take someone like him when he paints like that. Maybe they’ll give him an allowance too. And with the number of recommendations that he can get from the professors?”

With a hum, Dazai offers: “Maybe you can ask his brother.”

They make a face at each other, laugh, and get back to studying.

--

Dazai’s class starts at five in the afternoon, running up until seven p.m., and while there are days that she waits out for him at the gazebo for dinner, tonight was a special day. The Office of Student Relations has meetings on Tuesday mornings; and while they do post their announcements online the next day, the fastest way to get the news from them is to check the bulletin board outside their office at six p.m., which is when they post. Sitting on a bench right outside the office, she waits for the assistant or secretary to post what she’s waiting for and—

There he is!

“Hello,” she greets, standing up from her seat and walking toward the bulletin board. The secretary smiles and greets her back, tacking the notice to the board.

“Waiting on the requirements?”

“Sure am,” she answers, wringing her hands behind her. “Been very anxious.”

“Well, here they are. Best of luck.”

“Thank you!”

The secretary takes his leave shortly after that, returning back through the large wooden doors of the antiquated office. She left behind, stands in front of the bulletin board with her eyes closed, and takes a deep breath.

This is it. The requirements for her dreams, right in front of her.

She opens her eyes and takes out a flyer from the small pocket that the secretary had pinned onto the board. A flyer detailing the requirements for the one-year, international scholarship program of the Office of Student Relations.

A long, laundry-list of requirements, from filling in forms, requesting official paperwork like transcripts and recommendation letters, submitting portfolios, and passing a certain number of assessment interviews.

“I can’t afford to get distracted,” she says, to no one in particular, as if saying it out loud will make it real, will help it come true much easier than it actually will take. This is what he was all supposed to be—a small, pleasant motivation, a distraction for when idle, but not one that will stop her from what she originally intended to do.

This.

To go away.

But…

She tucks the flyer in between notebooks, thinking quietly to herself, But those are only books, so it can’t be that bad—can it?

#the wonder that’s keeping the starts apart #ikemen vampire #ikevamp theo

[inquisitorhotpants]

okay let’s just get this out of the way.

i didn’t like it.

If you liked it, I am honestly jealous of you! I wish I did. But I am really uninterested in any attempts to convince me to like it.

TROS review, with spoilers, below the cut

So I walked out of the theater very “meh” on it. Almost everyone else in my friend circle seemed like they loved it, so I ruminated on it for a couple days and came to a conclusion.

I’m not meh. 

I really, really don’t like that movie. I will likely never turn it on of my own volition.

These are not in any particular order, just as they come to me.

The pacing is absolute shit. 

JJ’s “Lost” buddies got more lines and screentime than Rose, an established character they promised was getting a bigger more impressive role in TROS. 

Everything important Rose did got cut. That lightspeed hopping Poe was doing? Rose worked it out. But I guess we didn’t need to know that.

There are more effective ways to communicate in a movie than having Poe stand around reciting exposition about things he shouldn’t know about, but clearly JJ Abrams is uninterested in any of them

So many unearned emotional moments that mean nothing to the characters but JJ slaps in there to mash the dopamine button because HEY REMEMBER THIS YOU GUISE

So just to be clear, Leia can fucking FLY THROUGH THE VACUUM OF SPACE but just mentally communicating with her shitty kid kills her, sure jan

Rey would have just fucking killed Palpatine if he’d just shut the fuck up but no

Someone banged Sheev Palpatine.

Who also managed to somehow survive the second death star FUCKING EXPLODING.

You had the chance to show a fucking sith cult and went with “have Poe recite exposition about a sith cult”

The universe shows up for Lando, but not Leia??? 

Do not get me wrong, i adore Lando! But I really feel like even Lando and Chewie would have been like, “what the fuck??” about this?

JJ Abrams is a fucking shit writer

Pretending everything in TLJ doesn’t exist - except for some halfassed R*ylo, apparently - is shitty

Rey felt grossly OOC this whole fucking movie.

SHE ABANDONED FINN ON THE GODDAMN DEATH STAR

In theory, the Palpatine thing could have been good in the right hands; JJ Abrams was not the right hands.

All it took for Kyle Ron to stop being a space fascist was thinking about his dad telling him to be nice? THAT’S IT? Well hell, why are we punching Richard Spencer when we can just ask his dad to tell him to be a good boy??

Why the hell did we bury the lightsabers on Tatooine? All Luke ever wanted was to get away from there. It meant nothing to Leia. It meant nothing to Rey. It was literally only there so that viewers could go OMG I LOVE ANH and get teary eyed

So after that frankly excellent acting where Rey tells Kyle Ron to leave her the fuck alone, we get heart eyes and “Ben!” and a fucking kiss? 

When she doesn’t even know who the fuck Ben Solo even is??

Neither do we because he has no fucking lines??

Finn is the glue that holds this fucking trio together and he’s reduced in half the movie to running after Rey. Gross.

We seriously took the member of the trio with the most established backstory and most filled in timeline in canon, played by a Latino actor ... and made him a former drug dealer. really? not a single person went “hmm maybe this looks bad”?

Fic writers will do hours of research so they don’t get something wrong in a PWP smutfic, and you can’t research Poe’s backstory for four seconds?

please enjoy your three minutes in each set piece, keep all hands and arms inside the screaming traincar at all times, and ... nowwww we’re going to slowwwww dowwwwwwwn so Rey and Kyle can Force Skype for no apparent reason

there are no actual stakes

“Chewie died!” just kidding

“threepio is gone!” just kidding

“we don’t have a fleet!” just kidding

“kylo ren, head fascist, is dead!” just kidding

“Final Order” is dumb as fuck

so much finnrey baiting

this covers the part about unearned emotional moments much better than i ever could 

Good thing Vader eliminated that galactic menace, amirite? oh wait

“closes the entire saga” hey jj you know there are NINE movies in the saga, right? cause there sure wasn’t fuckall about the prequels in there.

this “trilogy” doesn’t feel like one. at all. 

it’s so checkboxy. “they want r*ylo, check! no r*ylo, check! use that leia footage - shit we’re out, give her the weakest death imaginable. twin suns! palpatine! let hayden say a couple words so the prequels fans shut the fuck up! ‘everyone’ complained about rose, cut her out! cameos out the ass!”

The Knights of Ren were boring af.

rey gets no character growth

Are we just gonna make all the black folks in the movies related? Lando & Jannah already are, so do we get a short in a couple months where we find out Finn is his son and they’re all related to Mace Windu? 

It just felt very “i didn’t like your movie so i’m going to make 2 and 3 in one smashed together mediocre movie”.

I just cannot get past shit writing and shit pacing and a hack job at “homage”

Now i’m stuck looking at a hundred hot takes on twitter about how “this is ben solo’s trilogy! he’s the real hero! he’s the poor abused boy and no one else has ever had it worse in the entire star wars sagaaaaaaaaaaaa and how dare rey get everything while he was abused and neglected and had NOTHING” thanks jj

Y’all I love this cast and they deserved so much better than what they got from this trilogy.

I suppose there were a couple of things I liked.

the music was phenomenal, as always. Palpatine’s theme done in the style of Rey’s theme was great. 

space horses!

FINN FINN FINN FINN FINN

FORCE SENSITIVE FINN

the bickering scene. I got my hopes up after that. They were quickly disappointed as Rey quickly went off into OOC-land

Dark Rey and that little snarl at the end

I thought the new force powers were cool af. It’s about time we do something with the Force beyond jumpy jumps, zoomies, and the jedi mind trick

I’ve only known D-0 for 4 days but if anything happened to him ... you know the rest.

i actually enjoy the theme of “you are not your bloodline” but it was done so much better by Claudia Gray.

Anytime the trio was together was good.

As much as I am super “eh” on Kyle Ron as a character, I appreciate Adam Driver as an actor, and the scene where Rey passes him the lightsaber and he does that little shrug with the smirk, that was good. I liked that quite a bit. 

The problem is that cool setpieces do not a good movie make.

I started The Witcher the day after I went to the movie, purely to stop thinking about this shitshow of a movie, and that show is great. xD

#tros #the rise of skywalker #tros spoilers #tros critical

[fortunatelyhauntedblackcherry]

Moonshine - A Beetlejuice Fanfiction 12

Warning: swearing, several mentions of murder, scaring people out of their pants, Beej being a creep, shotgun use, abusive ex.

The ground was shaking, the house was somehow glitching and green smoke filled the living room. The girls heard a loud, croaky, devilish laugh right before the room turned completely dark. Even the lightning stopped. Sofía held Rei close in fear, while Ari was looking around with lustruous eyes. All of a sudden, a gravelly voice filled the air.

- Welcome, welcome, welcome, lovely ladies! - a weirdly handsome, husky man with fluffy hair, which went from black roots to glowing, bright green tops and stubble colored the same way stood on the dining table. He wore a dirty striped suit with a stripey shirt; a green tie, which had several spots of moss on it; black suspenders; and dirty black leather shoes with stacked heels. He was grinning, showing his sharp double canines; his golden, kind of catlike eyes were shining in excitement. Some random spots of dirt and maybe rotting patterned his face. He put a spotlight on himself, and as he threw his hands above his head, a couple of red neon lights lighted up around him. Some of them were arrows, pointing at him, some of them were captions saying "Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice". - Can all of you see me now?

- SHIT HE'S REAL. - screamed Rei.

- Wow. - gasped Ari right before the man jumped down from the table. He landed right in front of her. He locked his gaze in hers and offered her a hand. - You look WAY better than I imagined, based on the voice. - she put her palm in his. - Not so dead... - Beetlejuice lifted Ari up from the ground and as he did, he locked her in his arms, swooped her off her feet and planted a kiss on her lips. Which was followed by a bitchslap from the wide-eyed breather girl. Beetlejuice let Ari go, still smiling like an idiot.

- Sorry, sorry, I got overjoyed, I just had to, I couldn't help myself. Am I overstepping my bounds? - Ari nodded and smiled while she wiped her lips. This man can't be real. Crazy motherfucker is worse than I imagined. - It's just that this whole thing is so beautiful! - his voice got emotional and he put his hands on his chest, where Ari imagined his heart would've been. - You called me! You didn't have to, but you called me!

- The fuck you mean she didn't had to? - asked Rei who let go of Sofía to inspect the demon more closely. Beetlejuice raised an eyebrow, pulled a grimace, snapped his fingers and a couple pieces of furniture appeared before the winter garden's door, making a barricade.

- Solves all ya problems. - he turned back to Ari. - NOW! I'm gonna go, kill those suckers, have some fun, earn some screams, and leave chaos in my wake!

- Yes, good, get on it! - stated Ari, held Beetlejuice's wide shoulders, and turned him around to face the backdoor. - Get'em, tiger. - Sofía jumped in front of them, making Beetlejuice almost fall over.

- Wait, you really want him to do that?!? - Ari gestured with her hand and raised her eyebrows.

- Duuuh, I didn't summon him to play fucking yahtzee! - BJ chuckled and put his elbow on Ari's shoulder.

- I like your jokes but I like hu-mor. - he cooed with a tilted head and a cheesy smile. Ari flashed a kind of annoyed look at him and blinked fast.

- Later, Beetlejuice, later, please, we have so much shit to do and haunt and kill now.

- You can't do that! - said Sofía, still standing before Ari and BJ. - It's not just morally wrong, but don't ya think, Ariadné dearest, that if a bunch of guys get brutally murdered here, we'll have to bury them and having a shitton of mounds in our backyard would raise suspicion? AND since we have such a bad luck, I'm pretty sure the police would find the bodies somehow. - Beetlejuice layed back to the wall, inspecting his dirty black nails, sighing. There's so much trouble with living folks, they always find somethin' to ruin the fun. It's easier with dead guys, you have some problems with them, you just throw 'em to a sandworm and your problems are solved! WAIT...

- Hey, guys, sorry to barge in, but I just wanna state that if you push someone, that’s bullying, if you kill someone, that’s murder, sure, but if there is no evidence and nobody sees it... - he shrugged. - ...it’s a simple accident. - he showed a toothy grin, lightning flashing on his sharp double canines. - And those goddamn sandworms could swallow anyone alive.

- What's a sandworm? - asked Ari excitedly. BJ shrugged.

- Oh ya know, nothing much, just 10-meters-tall two-headed snakes with a killer appetite. If they eat someone, they automatically get deported to the Netherworld, or I dunno how ya folks call it, Purgatory. No problem with the body, or the ghost. - Ari smiled widely and launched herself at Beetlejuice. She hugged his neck tightly.

- YOU ARE A GENIUS! - Beetlejuice just stood still, not knowing what to do with the sudden hug.

- Well, being dead has its perks. - he said with a small, weird laugh. Ari made a disgusted face and quickly let go.

- Ew, you smell like rotten meat. Gross.

- Aww thanks babe! - ha cooed and put his weight from one leg to another like a little kid.

Rei cleared her throat.

- Isn't that swallowing thing still murder though? - Beetlejuice appeared right behind her out of thin air.

- Jesus Christ, Rei, you sexy son of a bitch, grow up! - he said and pinched her booty, then quickly reappeared on the dining table. - Please, sweethearts, shut up already! - he said in a nagging manner. - I'm ready for some people to die! Let me have my fun, you guys are like a snorefest! - the knocking started again, since the bad guys on the other side of the door realized they can't break it.

- Who's there with ya honey? - asked Matt, after hearing BJ talk. - Did... DID YOU HOOK UP WITH SOMEONE?! I AM ALL THAT YOU NEED! ARIADNÉ, DON'T MAKE ME COME IN THERE!!! - BJ pointed at the door.

- See, the stupid motherfucker's even asking for it!

The girls looked at each other. Rei was the first to talk.

- Well, I have a very little patience for stupidity. I say let's get rid of these jerks. - Sofía rolled her eyes and tried to say something but Beetlejuice quickly pointed at her and a metal plate appeared on her lips, making her unable to talk. She flashed an angry look at the demon. But he just shrugged with a wicked smile.

- Silence gives consent.

- There's only one more thing! - stated Rei, which made Beetlejuice do a huge eyeroll.

- WHATTTT.

- Kill only Matt. His henchmen don't deserve death, I mean at least I think so. - she said while looking at Ari. She nodded with pouted lips. - Only scare them. If you can do that. - Beetlejuice held his chest and dramatically made the expression of fainting.

- If I can do that?! What do ya think, what am I, a newbie? - he jumped off the table, booping Rei's nose. - Babes, I've been scaring for like a millennia. I'm the bio-exorcist of the Netherworld, giving houses enemas and shit. - he turned away. - Don't underestimate my power cause I'll be offended! - Ari laughed, jumped next to Beetlejuice who hold his arm out, so she locked arms with him. He stared deeply into her widely opened, emerald green eyes. - So tell me, little wolf, do you want to punish those who have wronged you? - he said in an arousing tone. His gravelly voice made Ari slightly shiver and gulp.

- Y-yes...

- Alright ladies, then let's turn up the juice and see what shakes loose!

With a snap of the fingers, all 4 of them teleported to the kitchen. The metal plate from Sofía's mouth disappeared, which made her kind of relieved, but still left her grouching.

- You snake-ass bitches don't respect the Sister Code... - she grumbled.

- Hey, d'ya want me to put the plate back on your slutty mouth, woman?! - asked Beetlejuice in a sharp tone. Sofía crossed her arms before her chest.

- ...I hate you. - Beetlejuice nodded then turned back to Ari with a devilish smile. His eyes were literally glowing at this point, and maybe he had sharper and a bit more teeth than an average human would have.

- Okay, so first thing first, I'm invoking the "No Judgement” clause of our friendship.

- What? Why? - asked Ari. Beetlejuice layed back to the middle kitchen counter and fixed his jacket. He flashed his glowing, hungry eyes at Ari and winked.

- Cause Imma get a little nasty... - Beetlejuice was interrupted by an angry scream. Matthias was banging on the door so loud at this point that Rei was sure he already broke some of his fingers.

- OPEN UP OR I'LL SHOOT THIS FUCKIN DOOR OPEN! - Ari's lower lip juddered at the sudden shouting. She cupped Beetlejuice's chubby face in her palms, took a deep breath and with heated determination in her eyes she said:

- Make him piss his pants.

- Your wish is my command, babes.

- I'M GONNA COUNT TO THREE! - Beetlejuice looked at the door and snapped his fingers. - ONE! - the furniture floated back to their original places. - TWO! - BJ let out a voiceless laugh as he wiggled his fingers and made the whole house pitch black. - FUCK IT! - and with that, right after the sound of barrel-loading a shotgun, the door of the winter garden opened with a creek.

One of the most sobering things in the world must be to experience a classical horror cliché in a house that is rumored to be haunted. There were 5 men standing behind Matt; he met them all earlier that night at a shitty pub, and they were all horny and drunk enough for Matthias to convince them easily to follow him and break into the house of his ex-girlfriend. Stupid boys thought that they'll get some easy pussy that night. Then they saw the house and all of them started to get second thoughts... But they quickly brushed them off, those rumors were just to scare the little townsfolk.

As soon as the door opened, Matt's henchmen looked at each other. Matthias hastily stepped into the house and looked back at the guys. They were stalling and shared concerned looks. Beetlejuice snapped his fingers and appeared with the girls hidden behind one of the huge cupboards of the winter garden. He leaned closer to Ari and whispered:

- Watch. This. - he pointed at one of Ari's big oleanders and started to wiggle his fingers. The plant started to grow, and as it got bigger and bigger, it became an anthropomorphic cross between a Venus flytrap and an avocado. It had a huge, nasty-looking pod which had shark-like teeth. Ari gasped and smiled widely. She always wanted to see this plant in real life. The men didn't notice the plant first, but then one of them started to sniff the air, which was filled with the smell of blood now, and turned around. As soon as he spotted the plant, he screamed like a girl. Beetlejuice opened his mouth in awe and circled his nipples.

- Oh how I missed that sound... - he purred. Ari laughed.

- Do the Voice, do the Voice, do the Voice! - she said excitedly and jokingly smacked BJ's upper arm a couple times. The demon showed his teeth, held out his hand like a sock puppet and immitated talking with it. As he did, the plant started to talk.

- FEED ME SEYMOOUUR! - the plant growled at the men before it. All 5 of them screamed and launched themselves into the pitch black room. They shoved Matt before themselves, who fell on his stomach, dropped his weapon and headbanged the hardwood floor. Beetlejuice snapped his fingers again, which made him and the girls reappear behind the sofa. He peeked out, threw his hand up and made a pulling movement. The burglars all got dragged deeper into the room. It felt like something grabbed their ankles and pulled them...

In the blink of a moment, the door slammed shut behind them, and maniacal laughter filled the air, like it came from every direction. Beetlejuice winked at the girls and got back to his normal, gravelly tone.

- Learn to throw your voice, fool your friends, fun at parties!

- Now THAT is cool! I wanna do that too! - said Rei in an excited tone. Sofía rolled her eyes; she was still very pissed at her sisters so she decided to not give a damn, doesn't matter what awesome things Ari's demon buddy could do. Ari peeked over the edge of the sofa and giggled at the expressions of the men. They looked so afraid. Beetlejuice quickly pulled her back and shushed her with a small laugh. He gestured towards the fireplace which instantly lit up. One of the guys let out a tiny scream, which made BJ rub his palms in ecstasy. He bit his lower lip.

- Mi mamá was right. - said one of the burglars, a shorter latino guy with wobbly voice. - This place... is cursed.

- No it's not. - stated the one next to him. He sounded clearly afraid as well, he just tried to cover it with confidence. - Anyway, what is it with you and curses? You're never happy without a good curse. Superstitious idiot. - he changed into a more sarcastical tone. - "This is cursed, that is cursed!"

- Give it a rest, will ya!!! - shouted Matt, who was looking for the shotgun. - Don't be pussies! It's just the wind, and my baby always had weird plants. You know what we came for. Let's head upstairs, 2 people per girl, and have some fun! - he flashed an evil smile at his "friends". And that made Beetlejuice's blood boil.

- Not on my watch, Mattyboy! - he hissed. He closed his eyes for a moment. Welp, hope I'm not rusty. - Let's see, what are you jerks the most afraid of?

He disappeared from behind the sofa. The girls peeked out, and clearly saw a shadow figure circling the men. It was audible that something was moving behind them. The burglars turned around but didn't see a thing. Beetlejuice's shadow form took a quick look into every men's eyes. Several scriptures from the Middle Ages tell us that if a demon looks into your eyes, they can see your biggest fears. Who would've thought that it's true?

- Got it. - said Beej as he reappeared behind the sofa with a snap. He took a quick look on Ari's excited faced, and flashed a toothy grin. - This is gonna be so. Much. Fun. Let's give those guys the fright of their lives! - Beetlejuice disappeared again, just to reappear next to the windows. His figure was vaguely illuminated by the random thunderbolts. He tilted his head sideways and dropped his left hand next to himself. His painted black nails grew into huge claws, his catlike eyes were glowing, just like his dark burgundy hair. It always looked like this when he was in a destructive, devilish mood. He flashed a wicked, Cheshire-like smile and started to scratch the windows. It made the girls' get goosebumps but the burglars' look was a good enough compensation for the unpleasantness. Ari was pretty sure that the guys saw BJ for a moment before he disappeared with a laugh again. He sounded so evil. Beetlejuice appeared next to Ari again, digging into his fluffy hair, eyes closed, wide smile on his face. Shit, that's hot, thought Ari. - I'm still the Ghost with the Most.

- What if they go upstairs? - asked Sof with a raised eyebrow, pointing at the burglars approaching the stairs. - Hmm? Did ya plan out something for that as well, Mr. Ghosty-ghost?

- Well I have ideas... - said Ari and leaned close to Beej. She whispered something into his ear which made him bite his lower lip. At this point his teeth were more shark-like than human-like.

- Shit babes, you're a natural... - he moaned and flung his hand towards the stairs. Matthias just stepped on the first step, but was stopped by the sight of 2 little girls standing on the top of the stairs, holding hands. Their eyes were all black.

- Come play with us, Matty. Forever... and ever... and ever... - they said in the same rhythm, with the creepiest child-voice you can ever imagine. The burglars stepped back. Ari couldn't hold back any longer and shouted:

- NOW!

The children started screaming histerically and in the same moment, blood started to wave down the stairs, soaring on the walls, splashing at the men. They all screamed bloody murder and tried to ran away, scattering in every possible direction. Beetlejuice's eyes were glowing with pleasure.

- Do you hear that sound, Ari? That BEAUTIFUL sound? - he said with a moan and bit his fist. - That is the sound, of clean, white, shorts turning brown.. - he looked at Ari. - Ain't it the sweetest noise around? - he laughed maniacally which made Ari and Rei giggle as well. - You guys stay here so you won't stay in the way, but you... - he grabbed Ari's hand and pulled her up to her feet. - ...you deserve to enjoy the show from first row, babes.

With a snap, they appeared in the corner, next to good old Long John Silver's skeleton. Beetlejuice wiggled his fingers and the pirate slowly came to life. One of the burglars, with terror in his eyes, tried to run away as far as possible from the reanimated corpse, but clumsily, he lost his foothold because of the dripping blood from his clothes and fell on his back. It made a huge thud. Ari burst out laughing, like the child she was in heart, but tried to cover her mouth with her hand. Beetlejuice was laughing too, but decided to top his performance and wiggled his fingers again. The pirate started rattling as he lifted his sword up, let out a warcry, and started to run in the lying man's direction. He let out an agonizingly high-pitched scream as he got up. BJ and Ari laughed more histerically.

- Did you hear that?! - wheezed the girl and slapped BJ's shoulder. - Oh my god let's make some more people scream!

BJ held Ari's hand, and pulled her over to the TV. The demon tapped the screen which instantly lit up in blue. Weird streaks appeared on it, then a hand from the inside, tapping the glass. Then another one. Then one more. Two guys, who now held each other, screamed out. BJ put his arm around Ari's shoulders.

- Panic and stress, oh ain't it the best? - he said an laughed with his head thrown backwards.

- You are such a weirdo! - she laughed and elbowed him in the side. He let her go, tilted his head sideways, hunched down and bit his lips in a weird, kinda creepy manner. Ari wheezed and scruffed his fluffy hair. Beetlejuice hunched down more.

- Now behind my ear... - he said with a moan. Ari pulled her hand back with a laugh. She looked around, admiring the sight of bloody men running around, but then her eyes found a specific person standing before the steps, staring at her with a shotgun in his hand. The smile from her face disappeared. She took a step back, and Beetlejuice instantly stepped before her, covering her with his body. He formed a little cup with one of his hands, held out the other dramatically and blew into his palm. A huge blob of fire appeared right before them, blowing up in Matthias's face. He screamed and BJ laughed. - No worries babes, I got ya. NOW WHERE WERE WE. - he turned around and after some looking, he pointed at a guy. He was trying to open up the front door, but it was shut. Beetlejuice made huge gestures and summoned a crazy eyed, killer looking dog. Ari awwed and crouched down. The dog acted all surprised when the girl scruffed his head, but in half a second he got really happy and wagged his tail. Beetlejuice raised an eyebrow and made an unimpressed face. - You are a hellhound, you are SO not supposed to do that. - Ari laughed, hugged the dog one more time, then pointed at the guy Beetlejuice was eyeing.

- Go, catch! - she said in an angelic voice. The hellhound started barking and running towards his target. Poor guy jumped up on the hall cabinet.

Beetlejuice snapped again. They now appeared in the downstairs bathroom. A burglar was leaning against the bathroom door, huffing, and as they appeared, he pointed at BJ in fear.

- YOU! - he shouted. - My dad told me about you! The stripey demon with the stupid hair who haunts the creepy house at the edge of the town! Nobody believed a young weedhead pizza guy but you ARE real! - Beetlejuice shrugged and flashed an evil smile.

- Well, why didn't you listen to him? I bet he told ya to stay away from this... - he rubbed his palms together. - ...creepy house... - he opened his palms, water pouring out of them. Ari climbed up on the washing machine, which was a good idea, noticing that something huge started to move in the water. A crab-like figure. The guy screamed bloody murder. BJ laughed and snapped. Him and Ari reappeared in the living room, right behind the sofa. Rei was clapping like an idiot. Shit, even Sofía looked a bit more enthusiastic now. What can I say, the guy IS good.

- Are you lovely ladies having fun? - Ari and Rei nodded exaggeratedly, Sofía huffed and rolled her eyes. - Well the real show is just about to begin! Take your seats! - Beetlejuice teleported the girls onto the sofa while himself appeared on the coffee-table. He started tapping a rhythm with his feet and out of nowhere, the sound of a guitar could be heard. Then came drums. BJ was kinda dancing around on the table, feeling himself. One of the burglars ran towards him with a glass thing he found on one of the shelves. BJ fixed his jacket and with a movement of a hand, he summoned fire towards him. Then laughed at the guy falling over. Now full on music was blasting. Theatrical weirdo, thought Ari. Rei clapped, BJ bowed. Then he raised his hands slowly, making big spiders emerge from the ground. Sof whined a little and closed her eyes.

- EWEWEWEWEW.

One of the burglars, who was sitting in the corner, legs pulled up to his chest, cried out.

- THIS IS JUST A LUCID DREAM! I'M DREAMING! - BJ turned his head backwards, then floated before him with a normal facing, tilted head, and grabbed the guy's chin.

- Really? - the girls didn't see what's happening really, but what they saw, was that BJ's head was getting bigger and that he opened his lower jaw like a snake. - Then tell me, buddyboy, why do I hear you screaming? - the burglar screamed out and turned white as a wall. Beetlejuice appeared next to Ari on the sofa. He wiped his teary eyes and laughed again. Ari grabbed his thigh with an excited smile.

- You are fantastic! Unbelievable! That was a sound that says I will never sleep well again! - she breathed in. BJ's eyes were glowing at her. Literally glowing. - I can't believe you are such a talented scarer. Hollywood should learn from you. - the demon looked down at his shoes and crumpled his jacket. A slight streak of pink appeared in his hair. Ari jumped back. - OH MY GOD YOUR HAIR CHANGES COLOR! - he pulled the differently colored streak and sighed.

- Yeah, it's like a moodring... Stupid thing always tells on me...

- THAT IS THE COOLEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN! - said Ari with excitement in her voice. - What does light pink mean?

- NOTHING. - stated Beej. With a little bit too much voice. He cleared his throat. - Imma tell ya later, but as you said, we still have so much shit to do, to haunt, to kill... - he winked at Ari who rolled her eyes and crossed her arms before her chest. Beetlejuice booped her nose, than pulled her up onto the table. He whirled her around in ecstasy, both laughing, BJ howling sometimes. - Nice moves, little hellion! - he laughed. The music in the background got louder and louder with each moment. BJ let Ari go for a moment. The guys were losing it at this point, most of them crying and running around. Beetlejuice looked at his pal. - Hey Ari, check this out! - he raised his hands, pointing at one guy after another, twitching with each move. All 6 of them stood up straight. BJ looked at Ari with a wicked smile. - Dance break!

To the rhythm of the music, the burglars all started to dance. They did the same moves BJ did, with a weird green fog in their eyes. Beetlejuice occasionally looked at the girls, who were laughing their asses off. BJ did The Thing™, which made them all snort. Beetlejuice didn't notice that it also made Ari check out his pelvic moves.

The music ended, Rei and Sof was holding each other, both of them teared up by laughter. Ari slapped her thighs. Beetlejuice bowed several times.

- Thank you, thank you, thank you! That was an old Scandinavian folk song. - the girls teared up again. Beetlejuice smiled like an idiot. Now his hair was more green then burgundy. He was having a great time. - I mean, yeah, I put my own spin on it, but... Hey, ya liked it!

And that's when their laughter was stopped by the sound of barrel-loading a shotgun.

#alex brightman #beetlegeuse #beetlejuice #beetlejuice fanfiction #beetlejuice oc #beetlejuice the musical #fanfic #fanfiction #lawrence beetlejuice shoggoth #musical!beetlejuice #beetlejuice broadway

[thepageofa1000worlds]

Pairing: James Conrad x reader  Part 1 · Part 2  · Part 3 · Part 4 · Part 5 · Part 6 ·

Synopsis: After having left thing uncompleted and unresolved with James Conrad 3 years ago, you two find yourself again in the kong island. What happened three years ago with you two? How is it that you got to make part of an expeditionary mission? 

Song: Ólafur Arnalds- So Far

Warnings: it’s a six part mini-series.

A/N: 

Words:  1957

    It had been almost 40 min since the group had left the gate. You were sited up front to get a better view of the island.

    “Putting the giant creatures aside and that everything that moves may try to kill you, this place is beautiful,” You told to Conrad, who was standing close to you.

    “ I agree with you,” Said Mason walking towards where you were.

    Hanks music was calming and the fact that you were in the way to the extraction point made it even better. 

    Now and then Slivko would turn the radio on to see if he could get any signal.

    “ Nothing? “ you asked 

    “ Nah” was all you got of an answer. 

     Every few moments you would turn your head to look at James and he would reassure you with a smile, that you were headed the right way. 

        “So those she now?,” asked Weaver at his side. 

She had been watching the exchange for what it seems to be 20 minutes now. 

    “ Tell her what?” Asked him

    “It is not like am trying to get in the middle of whatever this is, but if you two continue this way, I better be invited to the wedding” She joked making him laugh, of course, Conrad knew what she was talking about. Sometime during the night, he heard You whispering his name, trying to wake him up. It seemed that during the night he had moved and decided to put an arm around your figure, it hadn’t bother you at first but then you moved and hurt shoulder with his proximity. 

    James sighed, he could also feel Marlow’s eyes on him. 

    “  Oh I know that look,” Said Marlow “ You better say it” 

    “ Say what?” You asked walking up to them. 

    “ How far could we be from the extraction point” Said Slivko who too seemed to have heard the conversation they were having before you arrived. 

    “ So how far?” You asked looking at Conrad.

    “ I can’t tell for sure” 

    As the answer, he gave you left you a little down you decided to change the topic. 

    “ So who do you have waiting at home?” You asked Hank.

    “I got a wife, had a wife” He answered taking a photo from one of his pockets, he delivered to you and you pass it around for everyone to see. “ guess I don’t know anymore” 

    You could hear the sadness in his voice as he told how he got a telegram saying that his son had been born, a grown man he’d never met. 

    “ Yeah he defiantly thinks you’re dead men,” Said SLivko on the roof. 

    “ Slivko” You called out.

    “ Hey,” said James banging on the roof.

    “ Am just saying” 

    “ Then stop saying” you tried to imitate his voice.

    “ You don’t know that, you’ll be surprised how long people wait” Said Conrad looking at him. But you couldn’t deviate your eyes from him, you had waited so long to see him again and by doing so you weren’t prepared for the feeling that came back to the surface. 

    Hank didn’t expect to be waited he explained, he just wanted to meet his son. 

    “ That can be arrange,” you told him with a smile.

    “ We’re gonna get you home” added Mason 

    The voice of Packard through the radio broke the silence that had formed. You listen as Slivko told him about the boat and Hank.

    “ We need their location Slivko”

    You moved to the head of the boat to be able to have the best clarity, the flare appeared up ahead, you couldn’t avoid the cheer that came from you, but even better was the fact that you weren’t the only one that cheer.

    “ Get down” Shouted James, as Victor was in the air, just taken for what could be better described as a pterodactyl. As fast as you could you took one of the weapons at the side of the ship and tried to get a clear shot, sadly the close you came was to shot the bird in the wing which wasn’t enough to get it to stop. The screams of Victor were deafening as the birds devour him in form of your eyes.

    “ WHAT THE HELL MAN” Scream Slivko at your side. 

    “ He’s gone” Informed James. 

    Everyone face showed how horrified they were for what had just happened, and you could feel your stomach feel it too. Looking behind you, you were met by Mason and San who hadn’t moved their eyes from the scene.

    Once In the river, you made sure to refill the little metallic container with enough water to wash your face, as all you could see every time you closed your eyes was Victor’s body been dismembered up in the air. The cold that seemed only to be in your head made you put your jacket on.

    “Unless they were eaten by something bigger than us” You heard Mason said. 

    You walked towards James but stopped as you heard the sound of someone cutting through the dense jungle.

    “ Ah, holy shit” Exclaimed Slivko raisin from where he was to greet his team. 

    Cheers were heard all around, while you all said hi to each other.

    “ Its good to see you y/n,” said Packard, smiling at you. 

     After greeting them you turned to look for Randa.

    “ I thought you were crazy,” said Brooks to Randa.

    “  I wish I am” Randa looked at you. 

    “ Thank the gods you’re alive,” he said while hugging you. “If I made it out of here and you weren’t, he would kill me” 

    “ Its good to see you too,” You said with an enormous smile.

    “ WEST? We can't go west” shouted Hank, making all of you turn his way “ East is best, west is worst” 

    What were they talking about? moving towards the group so you could hear better.

    “ Guys I think we should listen to Marlow, “ Said Mason, raisin from her spot.

    “ Hey, your job is finding lost men” Said Packard, to James who shifted uncomfortably on the spot.

    “ Okay sir, but if we reach that position and that man is not there” Conrad had agreed “were back here by nightfall, in 24 hours we have to be on the other side of this island ”

    “ Roger that” 

    Oh god No, something about the way that Packard had said it didn’t give you the best feeling. You turned around to see Randa’s face, that confirmed your beliefs. 

    “ This was not on the plan,” You said to Randa.

    “ he wants to kill it,” Said him “ it isn’t such a bad idea” 

    “ This isn’t why we’re here “ You retorted

    “ He won't stop”

    Even though Conrad said to Mason not to tell him this was a bad idea, she did, either way, confirming even more what he already knew. Turning to see behind them, Mason saw Marlow talking to Slivko and his group about how they were all to die. On the other side, something much more interesting, you were having a conversation with Randa, Brooks and San. It was agitated as if you were trying to prove a point to Randa. 

    “ We better see what that's about” Said Mason standing up and moving to where you were. Conrad following close behind. 

    “ It basic biology and correct me you two if am wrong” You said signaling to San and Brooks “ If they take him out, balance will be shaken; He’s the bigger predator whose own presence is keeping any other creature at bay” You sighted “ If they kill him, the rest of the creatures here may try to get out” 

    “ Yes, you may be right but his own existence put us at risk” Said Randa

    “ She’s right Randa,” Said San

    “ Risk how? “ you asked “ He’d been here for far longer than any of us have been alive and he hasn’t left the island” 

    Mason was with you, years had passed and the very existence of kong hard remained unknown. 

    “anyway there is not much more we could do, Packard will do as he pleases” Said Brooks 

    “ Yes, he will and as he’s the only one with guns I say we better follow them,” Said, Randa. 

    The look on your face what that of someone at the edge, When everyone started to move you stayed contemplating the water of the river for a while. Mason decided that it was best to approach you. 

    “ We should better get moving,” She said, you turned around and looked at her 

    “ Am gonna regret going that way, I can feel it,” You said laughing, a smile spread through Mason’s face. 

    “ I already do” Your waves of laughter sounded even louder, both of you catch up to the group pretty fast so you weren’t the last ones.  

    During the entire walk, your words resonated on Conrad's head. They had altered the habitat of Kong when they first arrive and know looking back, they really didn’t know anything about the island. He had agreed to lead Packard to his man but as soon as that was, none of you (San, Brooks, Mason and Randa) were continuing with Packard. He was a danger in the current state. 

    Looking around, the things started to become way worst. The group had reached a place filled with gigantic bones, that made warning bells ring in his head. He searched for you among the crowd and find you near Mason who was taking photos not so far from him. Your luck was something you two laugher commonly, as you did have pretty shitty luck but this time he cursed, even if you were trying not to show if he could see it. The wound limited your movements, making you move slower and more rigid, your breath coming out uneven and you were paler than yesterday.  

    Deciding to wait until you and Mason catch to him. So he could make sure you were okay. You and Mason seem to have been talking the entire way here. 

    “ You two seem pretty friendly,” he said jokingly.

    “ She’s pretty cool,” You said, bumping your arm with her laughing.

    “ And she seems to be the only one with common sense” you couldn’t avoid the chuckle that came out “ Well you do have more than half the people here” Added Mason.

    “ You know what James, I want her to meet Dave” You looked at him and smile, he could only laugh.

    “ She keeps saying that but I don’t know what it means” Said Mason smiling at Conrad's side. 

    “ Imagine Conrad, but with a smile and better sense of humour” Mason laughter eclipsed yours and Conrads. 

    You all three stopped on your tracks. 

    “ Yeah, you smell that? Is death” Said Hank.

        Looking down, Conrad saw a mass grave that was surrounded by a strange gas. The long sight that escaped you didn’t go unnoticed by him. He heard Mason arrive, the same conclusion as he had. 

    “ We’ll cross through and make it to the highest point west,” said Packard. 

    Conrad heard Marlow disagree but his entire attention was on the grave in front of him. He felt you shift uncomfortably at his side and move his eyes from the grave to you. Your face was unreadable, but your body showed how you really felt. You had reached for your gun and fixed your backpack so that it was in the middle of you back.

     Your eyes connected with his and he could see the doubt on them, he wasn’t even sure that it was a good idea. 

    “ Keep close” He whispered to you. “ We can make it,” he said loud enough to be heard by Packard. 

    “ Stay sharp, keep an eye out” advice Packard.

    “ of course, let's ignore the man that has been 28 years in the island” You whispered back. 

    “ I think we already have” whispered Mason at your side.

Masterlist 

#james conrad #captain James conrad #imagine #james x reader #james conrad x reader #kong #kong skull island #james conrad imagine #reader #fluff #so far #mini-series #thepageofa1000worlds #tom hiddleston #tom hiddelston imagine

[awesomenightfall]

all this and heaven, too

For @lucyrne​! Modern!AU Varric/Bethany nonsense (featuring garbage!Purple!Hawke, ofc.) Mild language and mild (not explicit) sexual content. yes I also snuck in my guilty pleasure ship, Hawke --> Cassandra. Unbeta’d trash. Sorry.

---

Varric was two clicks away from confirming his Edible Arrangements order before sanity returned.

Sorry I had sex with your little sister, enjoy this fruit basket was probably not the best way to broach the subject of his night with Bethany.

Like most things in Varric’s life, he hadn’t planned for it to happen. Bethany Hawke, infinitely good, patient, and wonderful, having a sliver of interest in someone like him was too fantastical for even his overactive imagination. Sure, there had been months of blatant flirting, but Varric figured it was Bethany just being a nice girl. He never could have dreamed that what started as a friendly dinner and drinks would turn into “Oh shit, it’s 4:00 am and Bethany lost her bra under the bed.”

He never could have dreamed that that the venn diagram of Varric’s Pathetic Fantasies and Varric’s Harsh Reality would actually overlap for once in his life.

And of course, it had to happen with his best friend’s little sister.

Worse, it wasn’t even the usual “I’m so sad and lonely and hate myself” sex Varric indulged in. It ventured into “Oh no, I care about you and respect you” territory and that was terrifying in and of itself without the added complication of it being with a Hawke.

Varric knew there was always the option of never telling his best friend about his transgression, but he had had lived the secret relationship life before, and romance novels made it seem so much more glamorous than reality. No one liked to be kept a secret and both Bethany and Hawke (and himself, damn it) deserved better than that.

So here he was, prepared to send his lifelong friend an Edible Arrangement (because nothing said, “sorry I probably betrayed your trust and banged -- lovingly and respectfully, mind you -- your sister” like chocolate covered fruit) just to avoid the face-to-face confrontation.

Shutting his laptop, Varric looked up to his ceiling for answers and sighed when none were given. If he wanted to see where this thing with Bethany went, they’d eventually have to come clean to Hawke.

His phone dinged and, of course, it was the man he was hoping to avoid for the next fifty years or so.

[I'm a hoe, rich bitch and I work like I'm broke still]: the eagle flies at midnight!! caw caw!!

[Varric]: Hawke? When did you change your name in my phone?

[Varric]: Also, what the hell are you talking about? It’s 9:00 pm.

[I'm a hoe, rich bitch and I work like I'm broke still]: meet me @ the gym tomorrow at 7 sharp. officer mchottie lifts bright and early and im gonna be there to meet her. need my wingdwarf to hype me up

Varric was mid “go fuck yourself” text because he did not do mornings and he doubly did not do the gym when a pang of guilt hit him.

Shit.

[Varric]: Fine, but I’m only telling one Champion of Kirkwall story and then I’m out of there. I hate how gyms smell of sweat, self loathing, and despair.

[I'm a hoe, rich bitch and I work like I'm broke still]: ur the best! ;)

No he wasn’t.

He was garbage that was falling in love with his best friend’s sister.

---

“So who is this mystery lady that I got out of bed for?” Varric asked, plopping down on a nearby bench. “A cop? What, going legit, Hawke?”

He and Varric had skirted the law enough times that it was hilarious to think that Hawke wanted to hook up with an officer of the law. Varric was sure this was some kind of weird fantasy fulfillment or maybe Hawke had just run out of women in Kirkwall to have sex with. Either way, he had an ulterior motive: he was helping his friend, so perhaps Hawke would be more open to the possibility of Varric maybe, just maybe, dating his sister.

Hawke craned his neck, tilting his head towards the far side of the room. “10:00 o’clock. Don’t be so obvious. Wait a few seconds before looking.”

“Discretion is my middle name. So, about Bethany --”

“What about her?” Hawke started stretching just for show.

Varric’s throat dried up. The rational part of his mind knew Hawke would probably be fine with it. But the irrational part of his mind, the one that sounded suspiciously like the father of his ex, was screaming that he was worthless and what did have to bring to the table of any relationship?

He was a moderately successful author, he reminded himself. A businessman. A pretty damn good friend. Hawke’s damn good friend. Hawke’s damn good friend who helped get him laid by talking about how awesome Hawke was all the time.

But still...

“We--” Varric narrowed his eyes once he hit the 10:00 position. There stood a very familiar woman, tall, with cropped hair and cheekbones that could cut a man. “Wait. Isn’t that the cop who arrested me a few months back?”

Hawke’s eyes widened innocently. Too innocently. “What? Whatever do you mean?”

Varric scowled. “You can’t be serious.”

“Oh my dear, Varric,” Hawke chuckled. “I’m always serious.”

A headache starting from the base of his neck starting creeping up. It was a welcome distraction from his internal “This Is Why I Suck” monologue. “Hawke. She arrested me!”

“Well, maybe you deserved it.”

“She arrested and questioned me trying to get to you!” Varric hissed. It was taking all of his impeccable self control not to drop the Fine, you want to hook up with the cop that cuffed me? Good, because I made your sister scream my name last night. In your apartment bomb. “Where’s your loyalty?”

Says the dwarf sleeping with his friend’s precious little sister.

Hawke gestured towards the woman in question with a flourish. “Who needs loyalty when you could have those biceps? And did you see her abs? I know for a fact that she’s a huge fan of yours. You’re my in.”

Varric scrubbed his hand with his face. He’d rather listen to Anders’ manifesto -- the unabridged version -- than do this, but his conscience was eating at him.

“You owe me. You owe me so much and I’m going to collect, you bastard.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

---

Varric’s pocket vibrated, no doubt a message from Hawke scheming another plan to try to get a date with Officer Pentaghast, who did not take their earlier bait. In fact, she had looked them both over and only uttered a disgusted little, “Ugh” at the interruption to her workout. Varric imagined that the chase made her all the more appealing to Hawke; he was a true masochist.

Maybe that’s why they were such good friends. They did so love to suffer for their bad decisions.

“Is everything alright?” Bethany asked, pausing the television. It was Thursday, which meant they were indulging in their weekly bad reality show watching ritual, but Varric could barely concentrate on the shitty lives of the people on TV because he was so entrenched in his own bullshit. “You’re a million miles away.”

“Yes,” he said immediately but then thought better of himself. Bethany deserved better. “Shit, no. Sorry, Sunshine.”

Bethany gave him a sympathetic look and took his hand. “You’re not internally monologuing again, are you?”

“She said wisely, knowing full well that was exactly what he was doing.” Varric chuckled. “Just thinking about Hawke.”

“Ugh,” she said, not able to disguise the fondness in her voice. “Must you? He gets your attention every other hour of the day. Concentrate on the Hawke in front of you, if you please.”

He leaned over and pressed a kiss to her cheek. Varric had done it a thousand times in the years he had known her, but it felt new, exciting. Great, now he was feeling mushy and gross. As if things weren’t bad enough already. “Sorry. I’m just a little worried what he’ll think.”

Bethany clicked off the television and faced him fully. She frowned a little. “Why? We’re not doing anything wrong.”

He put his hands up. “I know that. You know that. Will he know that?”

“Who cares? You’re talking about a man who has slept with literally all of my friends. And all of your friends. Just desserts, if you ask me.”

Varric snorted. “Going through your rebellious stage, Sunshine?”

She tossed the remote off the couch and climbed into his lap. “Shall we find out?”

Oh, he was in.

---

Three shots of whiskey and Varric was ready.

He was a grown ass dwarf and he was going to bite the bullet and face judgment.

… okay, maybe after one more shot of liquid courage.

“I’m going to just say it,” Varric gasped at the after burn, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “I’m dating your sister. I care about her. She puts up with me, weirdly enough. And she deserves better than us sneaking around. So… there it is.”

Varric steeled himself for the outcome. He didn’t want to lose Hawke -- either Hawke -- but he wasn’t going to damn this relationship to failure without a fight. He just hoped his best friend didn’t deck him too hard.

Hawke put his beer down. “I know.”

“You-- what?”

“Do you think I’m an idiot? Don’t answer that,” Hawke amended quickly. “But come on, I’m not blind.”

Varric’s shoulder sagged in relief. And then, he was annoyed.

What the fuck? He had been stressed for weeks for nothing?

Maker, he hated this man.

“So you knew the entire time,” Varric said flatly.

“Duh,” said Hawke. “You’re my best mate. She’s my sister. It was so obvious. I think it’s great. I’m happy for you.”

Maker, he loved this man.

Hawke jabbed his beer bottle in Varric’s direction threateningly. “But I better not hear one word about a certain married ex coming into the picture if you’re seriously with my sister. If you hurt her, I hurt you. Clear?”

“Crystal. I know my word doesn’t mean much, but I’ll do this right, Hawke.”

“Great,” Hawke said cheerfully. “Now that that’s all resolved, let’s talk about me and Cassandra --”

“You’re on a first name basis?!”

“ -- picture this. I’m thinking.. Flowers. A shit ton of them. Maybe confetti. Women like confetti, right?”

Varric took another shot with a smirk, feeling better than he had in weeks.

“Sure, Hawke. She’ll like confetti. And extremely loud and ostentatious confessions of love, maybe with doves...”

#dragon age #varric tethras #bethany hawke #varric/bethany #hawke/cassandra #just a tiny bit #k writes trash #fluff

[amnachil]

The College Society Chapter 3 Part 3

4 days late is better than a week so be happy :)

I should be posting the next part of TP tomorow but you know me, I never do what I say :p

Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey Saturday January 26

It had been the worst three days of Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey's life. Maybe not exactly, but among the worst. On wednesday, he had tried to speak with Liam, but the freshman had avoided him, of course. Zack had told him to play it cool. To stay quiet a bit, and then talk with his "boyfriend". To stay quiet. Me. Stay quiet and wait ? What more ? Make the puppy ? And talk to him ? He meant apologise right ? Zack wants me to apologise. Me. Everything had happened because Amber and Theo had tricked him. She had got her hands on four tickets. She had gone on her own at the festival, and then she had waited the perfect moment. I can't express how mad I am. I can't say enough curse to calm down. After this horrible humilition, he had headed straight back home. He had wanked several times. Until he had felt pain and tiredness. And since then, he had met some old friends, some old and smart hunters. And he had banged them all. Some old preys too. He had been having sex, sex and more sex, but he still felt frustrated. He pictured Liam's smile. His soft voice. His cute booty. Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey was a predator. The best of his kind. He had chased hundreds of people. Gay, hetero, even alleged lesbian. He had always succeeded. His thought went to Liam again. This lad had a lovable expression. When they ate together, he was so genuinely happy. Zack wants me to apologise. Fuck Theophile and Amber. And all those assholes who had bet against him. He was ruling the university for god's sake ! And Zack wants me to apologise. Fine. For the first and only time of his life, Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey would beg forgiveness.

The lad headed towards Pasta's Place, where Liam was working this night, when he bumped into Theophile. This... Man I don't know. Fuckin' shitty greedy idiotic douchebag ? Nah. Bally foolish bitchy rotten bastard, it's better.

"Hi Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey. Going somewhere ?"

"Go back in the bloody pussy you came from nasty stupid bitch. I'm busy."

"Sounds like you're a bit more vulgar than usual. Are you scared to lose ?"

The blond lad did his best to stay calm. At least to not be even angrier than he already was.

"You're sure talking a lot moronic asshole." he grumbled aggressively. "Still, you didn't catch the prey either. Maybe it's too much for your prick to handle ? Go back to these fatty shit of yours, idiot."

"I never realised how many curse words you were able to use in only one sentence." applauded Theo with a laugh. "It make me horny. Look, let's make a little deal. You let me Liam. And you let me bang you from time to time because I reckon, you're the best lay around. Oh, and you put on some pounds, because I like you more with a belly. In exchange, you can keep your 1000$."

"Here is my counterproposal. I take Liam. I put my dick in your ass or mouth or any hole you have when I want to. I keep my money. And you go fuck yourself somewhere I can't see you. It's the last warning, don't play with me."

"For now, I'm winning. So be it."

When Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey arrived at Pasta's Place, he was barely calmed down. Judy glimpsed him first. At start, she wanted to make him clear off, but when she saw his eyes, she just led him to Liam. Apparently, this one just finished his shift and was about to left. When they glanced at each other, the Dean's grandson didn't know what to say. He wasn't good to make apologies. He didn't even know how to apologise in the first place. And this baboon was just standing there, looking at him. Damnit Zack, I hate you. Why did you convince me to do this ?

"Listen to me Liam. I'll not say this twice. I'm..."

Damnit, it was harder than he tought. The chestnut lad openned his eyes wide.

"Are you gonna..."

"Shut up, don't make it even more difficult." interupted Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey. "All I want to say is I'm..."

I can't. I can't do this, it's so humiliating. It was Amber and Theo who should be apologising. Not him. Liam slowly took his hands. He had a wonderful face. And damnit, his touch was so soft.

"You're what Dami ?"

It's not my fuckin' name. Please stop it. Stop with this cute nickname.

"I'm sorry." he finally spilt.

And a moment of silent. Say something.

"You're blushing." whispered Liam. "You're cute."

Don't say anything more. Don't. The freshman himself was as red as a tomato. This whole situation was the weirdest Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey ever lived. Even when he had had sex in a field, on the back of a cow, it had been less embarrassing. (Not with the cow, of course, just on her).

"We never really said we were dating or anything." admitted Liam. "I guess you have the right to see other people ?"

"You mean I can't if we are a couple ?"

It's mortifying. How could he survive like this ? As far as he could remember, he had always be with several people at the same time.

"I don't want to force you to do something you won't like." whispered Liam. "Listen Dami, I think you're very nice. Maybe you don't know this, but in a way, you helped me when my world was falling apart. Deliberately or not, you made my life better, and I thank you for this. To be perfectly honest, I'm not sure to understand what you see in me but... I'm okay, and I want to be your boyfriend. And I'm ready to let you have sex with other people like you're used too."

"Wait. How would you know I..."

"You've quite a reputation, but it's Theo who told me. But whatever, I don't mind this as long as your respect some conditions. Please ?"

Conditions. Is this baboon putting conditions at me ? Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey shook his head. What the hell was going on ? Why he felt so shy all of sudden ? Why I'm listening to him ? I should be leading the conversation.

"Which ones ?" he simply asked, much for his own displeasure.

"First, when I call you, you come, whoever you're having sex with. I'm number one for everything. Maybe it'll just be for a cuddle, or to see a movie, but I'm your priority." commanded Liam. "Second, you don't fall in love with any of them. Just sex, nothing more. I don't want you do be sentimentally involved with anyone but me..."

I'm not even loving you. You're just a prey. So why the hell I'm blushing everytime you open your fuckin' mouth ? Why ?

"Okay." the Dean's grandson agreed. "It works for me."

"Third, don't sleep with my relatives. Not my roommate, not my friends nor people I used to know in my past... It would be awkward. And four, you call me. I'm your boyfriend so if you need help with something, I'll be there. If you're sad, happy or angry, I wanna know."

Damnit. That's not what I planned at all. Things were getting out of hand. Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey tried his best to rationalize. To be his former self. But he just felt butterflies in his belly.

"And I've one last request. It's very important to me."

"Whatever it is, I'm fine with it." quickly promised the lad.

No ! What did I just say ?! What's wrong with my body ? With my brain ? I'm broken ! Someone needs to help me, I'm fuckin' broken !

"All the pastries and the plates you're making ? All for me. No sharing. I want them all."

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

"Sure. All my cooking is for you."

And then they kissed.

Liam Sunday January 27 – Monday January 28

My mother was right, with each piece of good news come a piece of bad news. Yesterday, Dami had agreed to be his boyfriend. (They still had some stuff to work on, like how to be faithful). (He had what ? Two or three lovers, no more right ?). But Liam wanted to be comprehensive and to respect Dami. If his new boyfriend needed to have sex to feel happy, Liam didn't want to stop him. As soon as I will be ready, I'll have sex with him too... But the chesnut lad wasn't feeling confident enough for that. I don't even know what exactly we are doing. Anyway, this late morning, when Liam woke up, he discovered Theo. He first thought the dark-haired junior had crept into their flat in order to devour Nick. He was ready to hit him with a baguette when his roommate said they had sex. Sex. Liam didn't even know Nick was interested in men... The ogre is having sex with his preys. It was bad, really bad. Liam understood the long-run plan of the monster : he intented to make Nick addicted to him. But can I do something ? I don't know what...

"You look worried." smiled Theo. "Have you some problems I can help with ?"

At this point, Liam wanted to hid under his bed with the unicorns. (They were friends. They would protect him). But he couldn't let Nick alone in this dangerous situation.

"By the way, I heard your father sued your mother." continued the ogre. "I think I can help you with that, since we all are friend here."

What ? Now it was sure. Theo was sent by the forces of evil to harm them. Liam had to find a way out !

"My father is your dad's lawyer. I'm surprised you never realised it. Anyway, I think we can talk to him. Maybe find an arrangement ?"

"Liam dude, it would be nice." added Nick.

"I have one question." interrupted Liam. "It's unrelated to the topic but... Ain't you bothered by cheating on Laura ? Does she know what you're doing ? And you Nick ?"

"We have an agreement." explained Theo. "I'm free to have sex with cute and sweet men like Nick, she's okay with that. I can sleep with you too if you want."

Oh. That's straight. Liam didn't want to sleep with an ogre. And he already have a boyfriend. Not the most faithful in the world but... he was cooking very well at least.

"You should try." excitedly said Nick. "Theo is like... very good ! Trust me, you'll quickly understand why I did that !"

"Uh well... I'm not interested." Liam diplomatically said. "But I'm okay to meet your father and negociate."

The whole conversation felt surreal. I didn't know Nick was interested in men. Or that Laura was aware... This is sooo weird. (Weirder than believing in unicorns, yes).

"Nice, let's say next saturday ?" suggested Theo. "I know the trial is in early february."

"Okay..."

Liam still needed help to save Nick. But he had had an illumination. His boyfriend was someone important after all, maybe he could help. (The chestnut lad had heard something about the Dean, but still couldn't remember what).

The young freshman went to work at 4pm. Judy welcomed him with a concerned look. Exactly like the last time they had talked about the forces of evil. While he got ready, she mumbled :

"Big guy, there's something you need to know."

"What's the matter ?"

He was captivated by his suit. The waiters here had cool suit, nice and warm. He tried once to steal one, but she had stopped him.

"I saw you kiss Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey yesterday. And I don't think it's a good idea." she said. "I know you're a grown-up man, and it's your call but... Do you know how awful he can be ? I think you're only another prey for his tally to be honest."

Liam had already thought about this. And he asked Nate's advice. After all, if Dami was actually sleeping with two or three other person at the moment, he probably had also a lot of ex. (And the freshman was known to be naive so maybe his boyfriend played him). (But he was trusting Dami, he felt it was the right thing to do).

"Thank you Judy but... I don't know. I think I can trust him. He's sweet with me. I've a gut feeling about this. And I appreciate him."

"You sure ? I thought this at first too. Then he ditched me."

It took Liam a moment to undestand. So... they used to be a thing. Okay. Now he was wondering, who had slept with Dami ? Stop it Liam. Stop it now. As Nate said, he shouldn't think about his boyfriend's past. After all, he didn't want his own past to resurface.

"I'm sorry to hear that Judy, because you're a nice girl." he assured. "But I still think it's different. Maybe I'm a fool, and maybe I'm really stupid, but I want to try."

The next morning in class, the professor of macroeconomics gave them an important information. They would make a journey in France. It would take place during the winter holidays. It was unusual for first year students, but the Dean and the administration decided to chose the thirty best students in economics, and give them this opportunity. It appeared Nick was the major of their promotion, so he would be part of it. Rebecca, Barbara and Colton aswell. But Liam never expected to heard his name. Apparently, he was among the best ? I can't believe it. For real ? He felt really happy about it. (In case some people wonder : Liam was bright. With focus, he could probably be a very good student). (But the chestnut lad wasn't thinking about it at all). Some of his friends weren't really pleased with the group, but he was. Plus, the professor anounced they would select some junior and sophomore to come with them. All I need to do is convince Dami to come. Easy-peasy.

Barbara Wednesday January 30

At first, she had thought it would a piece of cake. All she had to do was convince a professor to support her more than Summer. But Ms. Weber wasn't cooperative at all. It was already hard to find the hunters among thousands of students and staff in the university. Barbara discovered some names thanks to Javier, but not enough. And now, one of them, Linda wouldn't help her.

"Look, I'm not sayin' I won't be in your side at the end." she explained. "But for now, I'm trusting Summer. The girl's good. She knows what she has to do to maintain order."

"But isn't she a kind of rival ?" asked Barbara. "For the hunt I mean."

"That's right, we're looking for the same kind of prey. But there are plenty of young male around here. I don't have any gripe against her honestly. Prove you're better or worthier and I'll support you."

I already am... The short blonde just smiled. Obviously, the hunters weren't glad to see her. According to Javier, it took time to build a name in their society.

"Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey himself was my very first support." she reminded. "Does this count for nothing to you ?"

"It depend. Did you ever sleep with the man ?"

"No."

"Well, it's normally easy to turn him on. The man only love his prick you know ? If he hadn't sleep with you, it means he doesn't have much interest for you. And Summer knows how to talk with him. She's the head of student for the second year in a row, it mean something."

"Yeah, I understood this. Thanks you Ms. Webers. See you soon."

Damned. Such a waste of time. It wasn't the firt person she tried to convince. But the hunters were all supporting her opponent. Summer was useless and definitely not smart, but she had numerous great allies. I need to make a move to impress them. An important move. She was heading towards the library when a dark-haired lad approached her. He was tall and ripped, pretty imposing.

"Hey there." he greeted. "I'm Theo Meyers, nice to you meet you."

She knew him. Javier had said he had challenged Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey for his title of best hunter. And whoever is the best hunter is likely able to be the king.

"I heard you were trying to take Summer's position ?" he asked. "I guess you need a little help to make all these hunters work with you ? I mean, powerful people don't really like rookies. Are you a rookie ?"

Barbara smiled prudently. She had already met people like him. Psychopaths.

"I'm not." she replied. "And I'll figure out something."

"Why not beat the most famous and feared hunter ? You could win some respect that way."

Now it became interesting. But she had to be cautious. Obviously, Damian Nicholas Smith-Carrey had a lot of ressources. And he didn't seem to have a weakness.

"You've only one thing to do for me, and it's a win." explained Theo. "Distract him on saturday. I'm gonna win the bet this day. Can you do that ?"

"Yes."

She already had the start of a plan.

To be continued

Quite an important part becaure YAY They are finally together !!!! It’s not like... the perfect couple yet, but here they are. Liam is a very eager feedee, he wants the cook to feed him and only him ;) But they’ve still many problems to solve and many hardship to face. The happy end is far away, count on me for that.

And speaking of problems, Barbara and Theo made a deal. Which is not good news...

#the college society #cs #Damian Nicholas Smith Carrey #Liam #Barbara #relationship goals #an ogre is fattening people in this college #and he's evil #Damian is a mess #Damian is very bad at feelings #Liam's surprisingly mature #Chapter 3 #Part 3

[helly-watermelonsmellinfellon]

Random anon here. I recently saw your ask about Severus Snape and I wanted to know, what are your reasons for supporting him? I'm not trying to start an argument I swear (personally he seems to fall more on the "love to hate" side of morality, but that's my opinion, not yours!) I'm just struggling to find my own opinion and I've seen both extremes on the topic. I realize this is kind of a racy question so feel free to just ignore me if'n ya want!

Okay, so I am not well off, and it was especially worse when I was younger. I grew up in a ghetto, on the worst side of the city. I didn’t have friends for the longest time. It was hard, and even then, I wasn’t aware of just how hard it truly was for my mom and I.

When reading Harry Potter, I never saw Severus as a bully. In fact, I just really didn’t take him seriously because he came off exactly as McGonagall, which is really strict. I’ve had teachers do far worse things than he’s ever done, so to me, Professor Snape was just really strict like a nun. At least he couldn’t hit the kids, which is different compared to the school I went to for years. Comparing my experiences at school, to his actions toward students, is nothing.

For the longest time I didn’t hold an opinion on him, other than why the hell does he care what happens to Harry if he doesn’t like him, you know?

PoA starts to put it together really. Dumbledore’s stupid comment in PS wasn’t really considered because I was more angry over Slytherin getting shafted out of points after being declared winners. (I was 6 when I saw the film the first time, and my sister was only a year older when she saw the film the first time and that was her first reaction too.)

But in PoA, Harry gets dragged into Snape’s office where he mouths off and Severus reveals that Harry’s father and his buddies nearly got him killed, and that whatever Dumbledore said, was greatly watered down to make James appear great. However, I was still very young and didn’t comprehend everything. Only that Remus literally admits at the end of the book, that Severus would have died because of Sirius using Remus to play an awful prank, and Dumbledore made Severus stay quiet about it, which wasn’t fair.

Sirius allows Severus’ unconscious form to bang into everything, Severus conjurs stretchers for everyone, including Sirius, and there was banging in sight.

In GoF Sirius tries to make him out to be someone super horrible but I couldn’t take him seriously because he obviously hates Severus and is really immature about it if we use the banging his head off of stuff as an example. How would he know that Severus was evil before coming to school?

The next time I truly consider him beyond that of a strict teacher, is in OotP when Harry rudely rifles through his memories and we see a scene that I have personal experience with. We see his ‘worst memory’, meaning it’s bad.

As stated earlier, I grew up in a ghetto. Mom and I were the only ‘white people’ in said ghetto that was African/Mexican. And while most people backed off when they learned that my sperm donor is a black man with many large, black brothers, some still bothered me. And when I transferred to the public Elementary School down the street, I wasn’t safe there either. I got bullied in my neighborhood, and bullied at school by the popular kids.

So we all know James was supposedly well-liked, meaning popular. And Severus wasn’t. And with how the series treats Slytherins, it’s not shocking Slytherins are bullied just for their House.

Severus is assaulted by 4 people on one, which annoyed me because I was used to that. Sometimes even more people. And if I fought back, they would claim I was the bully and try to get me in trouble at school. I had a bad reputation, and no one questioned the favorites because how could they ever do wrong?

The unfairness of a many on one scenario, made me so angry as a tween and to see him going through that just immediately put me off to James Potter. They held him down and choked him and stripped him, and a similar situation happened to me once in the park down the street where they struggled to pin me and managed to get only my pants off before I got free. 5 boys against 1 girl. Just because Severus has a dick, doesn’t mean the situation is any better with him in it.

James says he does it ‘because he exists’. Something else I’m familiar with. And then we get right from Lily’s own mouth, that the Marauders are arrogant and cocky and pick on anything just because they feel like it. She makes that observation. Severus saying a bad word once in the whole series wasn’t really enough to suddenly get me to hate him. I was disappointed with him, but was more hyped up at the time, on the fact that the great and wonderful Marauders, were just a group of bullies.

And then 1 chapter later, Sirius and Remus confirm EVERYTHING, but try to play it off as something simple. They said they never stopped bothering him, but that they got better at hiding it so Lily wouldn’t know. The bulling continued all throughout school. They graduated as bullies. It was very clear to me.

Effin wonderful.

And by the end of the book, we see that Severus was giving water to Umbridge instead of a truth serum. That he alerted the Order to Harry’s vision and told Sirius to remain behind on Dumbledore’s orders. That he went into the FoD to search for them when they didn’t return with Umbridge. He did all this when he didn’t have to.

I was a mixed bag of emotions in HBP because I don’t like Dumbledore at all so Severus killing him didn’t affect me in the least. His supposed betrayal though, hit hard and I was so sad. I read that book during the utter height of my Depression, so it was especially hard for a character that I formed a close bond with due to mutual experience, would truly be Voldemort’s man. This was before I understood that liking an evil character doesn’t make you evil. And it just contradicted all I knew about Severus’ actions during Harry’s school years and was difficult to come to grips with.

And yet in DH his actions made no sense. Sending Ginny to Hagrid for detention instead of to the Carrows? That was supposed to be a punishment when he knew they were friends?

And then all is revealed and we got more back story. He was just as poor as me, bullied before school even. Petunia bullied him for being poor. She bullied her own sister for having magic. Like, seriously, she’s horrible. 

On the first day, James and Sirius began picking on him for wanting to be in Slytherin. They hadn’t even been sorted yet and they were already bothering him.

And I felt Lily, the Prefect, expecting him to control his Housemates who aren’t even his friends, wasn’t fair since he was at the bottom of the ranks in Slytherin for his blood status. She made no attempt to control the actions of the Marauders, which Remus didn’t either as he too was a Prefect. They actually had power in those situations and never used it, which isn’t Severus’ fault.

Dumbledore’s plan comes into the light and nooooo, Severus was never on Voldemort’s side! Thank God!

And then he died to see Voldemort taken down.

It was pretty cut and dry in my eyes. He worked for Dumbles the whole time, just to make up for his mistake.

I am much older now. I know more things. I am in a better mental state than I was when I finished HP. I love Voldemort and I am unashamed of it, because I know that I can like an evil character and not approve of their actions.

I have seen other people’s thoughts of Severus and looked at his actions from different points of view.

How he treats his students is still nowhere near to what I was used to growing up. From my personal experience, he was very easy on his students when in such a dangerous class. It however, is bullying. I know that now, and I am disappointed in it, though can understand that half is for show, and the other half is because he’s a bitter asshat.

I too am bitter. I don’t like kids. I hate people in general. I lack tolerance for most things that annoy me. I am not mentally healthy despite being better than I was.

Harry had similar experiences to Severus. People use him somehow coming out perfectly as the only possible example of an abuse victim to become. He is in fact, unrealistic. To the extreme.

I understand now why Severus is the way he is. I understand why I am the way I am. That will not excuse the shitty things we’ve done, but it makes sense. Our experiences shape us, and people expecting someone who went through what Severus went through, to come out fine, are stupid.

I connect to Severus Snape very deeply. And with wiser eyes, I can see even more problems deeply entrenched in the things that happened. The stripping of someone without consent is sexual assault for example. Every now and then I re-read and pick up the more abusive aspects of what I read, and Severus was on the receiving end of some terrible shit that people overlook or excuse.

And it angers me when people ignore his plights as a teen because to them, he was the world’s biggest bully as an adult. Yes, it’s immature that he took his justified anger at James out on Harry. No, it is not okay behavior. No, he is not the biggest bully to ever live. No, his actions to stop Voldemort are not diminished simply because he was an ass to kids. Yes, he earned his redemption for joining the Death Eaters by helping to end Voldemort. Plain and simple.

If people can blame 15 year old Severus for what he did then and in the future, I am allowed to hold the Marauders accountable for the shit things they did as teens. Simple concept.

My #Severus Snape tag would take you on a trip.

#Severus Snape #Snape

[zeltricstudio]

'CAPTURE THE MOMENT'

DAWN

AUGUST 2015

“What is this shit?” Tony said as he slapped a few polaroids onto the table. The pictures were of a blurry figure in the woods at night

“Proof” Johnny replied as he lit a cigarette

“This isn’t proof. This is blurry nonsense”

“No it’s not, it’s an unknown creature in the woods” Johnny said, not paying as he continued smoking

Tony took the cigarette from Johnny’s mouth and put it out.

“Hey! I was up in the woods till 2 am trying to get you these photos, that’s gotta be worth something” Johnny said, sitting upright

“I have been very patient with you Johnny. I covered for you when you missed deadlines, showed up reeking of alcohol and even when you feel asleep in the bathroom but this is one incident too many” Tony said, rubbing his temples in frustration

“Come on, you know how hard I work-“ Johnny began to talk but was cut off

“Oh I know. All you do is fuck all, and taking shitty pictures. If I wanted shitty pictures I would do it myself”

“Please, give me one more chance, I promise I’ll fix up my act” Johnny begged

“Okay” Tony took in a very deep sigh “I’ll give you one more chance, but if you fuck this up I am done with you” Tony said sternly

“Okay thank you, I promise I won’t mess this up”

“Stop with the false promises, just actually do it. If I don’t see some goddamn proof of something in those fucking woods you’re getting the boot. Now get out of my office!” Tony yelled.

“Thank you once again, I promise not to let you down” Johnny said as he quickly got out of the room. He knew better than to push his luck when Tony got angry with him.

“Fucking prick” Johnny said once he was out of the room and the door was closed. Johnny lit another cigarette and proceeded to make his way out of the building.

Johnny was a competent photographer working for the Happyvile Paper but it didn’t take long before his charm would wear off and people began noticing he was not as good as he claimed to be. At first his excuses could past but now his boss was beginning to get annoyed with how bad he was. Johnny knew if he wanted to keep his job, he was going to need something good to show his boss. Johnny returned to his apartment and once inside, he put his equipment onto the ground and immediately fell onto his sofa, not bothering to change out of his work clothes as he went to bed.

A few hours later, around 7 pm he was woken up by some loud banging.

“Who the fuck is that?!” he shouted out, still laying on the couch

“It’s Ella”

“Oh shit” Johnny whispered to himself as he immediately sat upright and tried to make himself look presentable. “One moment” he said as he straightened his jacket and pants. Johnny slicked his hair back and opened the door.

“Hello love-“

“You’re a piece of shit” Ella said as she pushed herself past Johnny into the apartment.

“Come on it” Johnny said and closed the door

“I can’t believe you forgot” Ella said with a pissed off tone in her voice

“I didn’t forget, I just took a nap is all. I was going to call you”

“Oh yeah, where are we eating?”

“Uh- well um- there’s- there’s this uh” Johnny began stuttering, trying to think of someplace

“God, I can’t believe you!”

“I’m sorry, I’ve just been caught up in work is all”

“With work? Getting drunk in the woods and taking pictures of trees isn’t work at all”

“Babe please-“

“Take your ‘babe please’ and shove it. I feel like I’m the only one trying to put in any real effort into this relationship”

“I put plenty effort into this relationship, okay? Sorry if I forgot this one time”

“I’ve made dinner plans the past 7 times! I’m the one who is constantly changing my schedule to suit yours! The amount of times we’ve had to go to the pub because you ‘forgot’ fucking hurts” Ella said, using her fingers to make air quotes for the word ‘forgot’

“Look, I’m having a really bad string of luck, just please, let me deal with work first and I’ll focus on us okay? If I do this next assignment well, I promise to take you out to a fancy dinner. I’ll make plans and everything”

Ella stood there in silence, angrily fuming as Johnny patiently waited, giving her sad eyes to gain sympathy

“You promise?” Ella asked

“Yes, 100% I promise” Johnny said with sincerity in his voice

“Okay, but I’m serious if you forget we. Are. Over!” Ella said and began leaving the apartment

“Thank you babe, I love you so much-“

“Go fuck yourself” Ella said as she slammed the door shut on her way out.

“Fucking hell” Johnny said once she was out and laid back onto the couch. After a few minutes, Johnny sat back up and lit another cigarette, before taking his laptop out of his bag and turning it on. Johnny searched “creature sightings in Sunshine” and began looking through various links. Most were obvious clickbait headlines, but one caught his attention. “The Dawn Animal Study Group”. Johnny began reading it and this was the ticket he needed. Lots of discussions about various creature sightings in Dawn and a few more images of possible creatures, but none with enough clarity. Johnny saw a number to one of the members and called them.

“Hello?” the voice on the other end spoke

“Hey mate, this is uh Jim calling about your latest photo in the study group animal thing”

“Well hello Jim, the name’s Zac. I’m glad you’re interested in our study group”

“Very interested. I’m a photographer and I love exploring wildlife and all that” Johnny said, trying to fake his enthusiasm

“I agree. Was there something you called about specifically?”

“Yeah, I was wondering if you might know of any good spots to take pictures. I tried in Happyvile but there is just nothing here”

“Happyvile? That is quite far away, are you sure?”

“Oh definitely. Got the weekend free, I am prepared to just get out there and spend the weekend taking pictures”

“Well that’s wonderful to hear. If you’re serious I might know a few spots you could head to”

“Great, that works”

“We all are exploring different parts, I’ll give you an unmarked area to explore. Who knows, you might be the first in finding something new. If you drive out to Camp Star National, you can park your car their and go venturing into the woods. It’s near a trail so if you get lost you can find your way back”

“Cheers mate, you’ve been a great help”

“Anytime. Take care”

“Take care”

Later that night, Johnny began researching about the trail and how to get there. Thankfully he was a frequent camper so he had all the gear ready to go. Johnny called Ella to let her know where he was going.

“I’m not here at the moment, please leave a name and number and I’ll get back to you *BEEP*”

“Hey babe, I’m going to be heading into Dawn tomorrow for my assignment. Normally I would ask you but I know you’re mad so I’ll just give you some space. I promise when I get back, I’ll get to work on making those dinner arrangements” Johnny hung up the phone and went to bed.

The next morning, Johnny woke up early at 5 am and began making his drive. After 2 hours of driving, Johnny arrived at Camp Star National. Johnny went to the Ranger’s Station to report in.

“Name?” The Ranger asked as he clicked his pen

“Johnny Finn” Johnny replied

“How long will you be camping?”

“2, 3 days”

“Have you been camping before?”

“Yes, plenty of times”

“Okay, I know you know the basic rules but I got to go over them”

“Yeah I know” Johnny said as he began lighting a cigarette

“1. No littering of any kind. This includes clothing, camp gear and other item, especially cigarettes.” He said and eyed Johnny, who stopped himself and put the packet back into his pocket

“Whatever you bring with you, you take back with you.

2. No hunting or disturbing the wildlife.

3. If you have animals, make sure to clean up after them.

And 4. No going beyond the yellow tape”

“Yellow tape” Johnny asked, curiously

“We are still exploring the area and making a trail. Anything past the yellow tape is unexplored and most likely not safe to go through”

“Ah right”

“Yep. Please sign this to acknowledged you heard the rules and agree to them. Failure to comply can result in a fine”

Johnny signed the paper and he began setting out to explore. Johnny ventured off the main path and continued walking through the dense woods. The further Johnny went, the less he saw people camping and eventually he was all alone until he came across the yellow tape. Johnny thought for a few seconds and thought ‘fuck it’ and went anyways. He most likely would be returning the next morning and figured he couldn’t get lost easily. Johnny ducked under the tape and went off.

After a few hours of walking it began to get dark. Johnny was prepared to set-up camp until he noticed something in the distance. Johnny saw what looked to be train tracks that were still intact. Johnny followed the tracks for a bit and that’s when he noticed there was movement ahead. There was a group of men in black clothing moving what looked to be a metal box on wheels. The box was strapped down with chains and was shaking violently as whatever inside was trying to get out. Johnny would’ve turned away but he needed something and this was the best he was going to get. Johnny put his equipment down and took his camera with him as he slowly trailed behind the men, sticking to the trees.

As Johnny trailed behind, he began silently snapping a few more pics. The tracks lead to what appeared to be a tunnel. The entrance to the tunnel was closed off by security fences with a sign on them saying “NO TRESSPASSING”. The men removed the fence and wheeled the metal box through before closing it. Once the men began descending, Johnny waited and looked around and once the coast was clear, he climbed the fence over and began his descent. Soon it began to get darker and darker and Johnny took out his lighter to light the path. The closer Johnny got, the more the rotten smell began to intensify. It was putrid, so Johnny hiked his shirt up over his noise to try and block out the smell. Johnny reached the bottom of the hill and contemplated if he should venture further into the tunnel.

“Fuck, fuck” he said quietly to himself, debating his actions. “Come on Johnny, you’ve come this far, don’t pussy out now” he reminded himself and continued walking into the tunnel. The tunnel was very wide, with 4 tracks running through. Some were still intact and others had been stripped and removed. The eerie silence and darkness didn’t help Johnny as his heart began beating faster. The sound of his feet and the flickering of his lighter were amplified in the tunnel and sounded much louder than they were. After a few minutes of wondering in the darkness, Johnny noticed a light in the distance. As Johnny got closer, he noticed a small living area had been set up. There were train carts that had been stripped of their wheels and some couches and folding chairs in poor condition strew around several barrels on fire, lighting up most of the area. Johnny could hear the men up ahead and went into a train car and hid in the darkness to peak on them.

“Okay, easy now” one of the men said as he and another man were setting down the metal box onto the ground and removing the chains.

One of the men from a side room walked into view, dragging a man who had been bound and gagged, viciously struggling against him.

“Relax pal, quit squirming” the man in black said before gut punching the bound man, making him double over and fall to the ground, curling up

“Okay we ready?” one of the men said

“Yeah” the others all agreed and all of the men left the area and went into the backroom. One of the men took out a small knife and stabbed the bound man in the arm.

“MMMMMM” the bound man tried screaming, but his gag prevented it.

The last man ran into the backroom and shut the door. The metal cage began beating faster and faster. Johnny was horrified but he still continued taking pictures, making a mental note to alert the Ranger to what was happening. The metal box began to break, first the hinges popped and then the chain surrounding the door broke free. The door popped open and a creature came tumbling out. The creature was the most horrific thing Johnny had seen. He appeared to be a humanoid figure, with most of the skin stitched together, giving the appearance of a melted man. His arms were massive and building out, as if there were about to pop. It’s head was covered in giant bubbles of flesh, obstructing his face. The creature got up and began walking over to the bound man, who tried to wiggle away but the pain was too much for him to push past. The creature grabbed the bound man by his neck and easily lifted him a few feet into the air, strangling him. The creature then grabbed his shoulder and began pulling the head apart. With a single motion, the creature tore the head off the man, spraying blood all over the area.

Johnny was in completely shock and nearly vomited, horrified at what he just witnessed. The creature was about to continue ripping apart the man, until he stopped and stared directly at Johnny. The sudden stare made Johnny stumble, giving away his location. The creature threw the man’s body at the wall, making a sickening splat noise as it hit the concrete with intense force. Johnny quickly got back up and began running to the exit as the creature began running. The creature’s footsteps were extremely heavy, making loud thuds as it slowly began closing in on Johnny. The darkness of the tunnel were suddenly illuminated by red lights that filled the entire room. With the entire tunnel lit up, Johnny began noticing all the dead bodies slumped against the walls. All of them were torn or destroyed, with their guts sprayed out and stretched across the walls. Johnny didn’t have time to stop as he heard the sound of mechanisms activating. Near the hill leading up, a giant metal gate dropped down and made an extremely thunderous slam as it fell to the ground.

“No no no no!” Johnny began screaming as he reached the gate. The bars were too tight together, not allowing enough room to squeeze past. Johnny turned around and saw the creature running towards him, followed by several more creatures rushing to him.

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck!” Johnny kept screaming to himself, as the creatures surrounded him and charged at him. The first creature gripped Johnny by his throat and lifted him into the air silencing him as he began choking. Another creature grabbed Johnny by his arm and began tugging him. More and more creatures began grabbing Johnny’s limbs and began pulling. Almost simultaneously, all of Johnny’s limbs were ripped off, their blood spraying all over the gate and walls. Johnny’s head was detached from his body and thrown away. The creatures threw the body parts away from them, some hitting the walls and others hitting the gates. The creatures left the gate and returned to the tunnels.

“*BEEP* You have 2 new messages *BEEP*”

“Don’t bother coming into work today, you’re dead to me. If you show up, I’m calling the cops on you. You are officially fired!” Tony screamed and hung up.

“*BEEP*”

“I really thought you changed Johnny, I really hoped you did. But no calls, you’re not picking up. I’m done with you. Don’t bother calling me, I don’t ever want to see or hear from you again” Ella said and hung up.

“*BEEP*”

“We got anything?” A man in black asked as he put the phone down

“Nothing. Aside from a phone call to girlfriend and some guy named Zac, Johnny only told them he went to Dawn” Another man in black responded as he continued searching through Johnny’s apartment.

“Guess we’re done here”

The man in black pulled out a phone and called someone.

“We’re clean here. Johnny Finn died after being mauled to death by an angry animal. He shouldn’t have crossed the yellow tape”

“Understood” the man on the other end responded.

The man in black hanged up the phone and the two of them left the apartment.

#THoS #TheHorrorsofSunshine #ZeltricStudios #HorrorStory

[notreallybusy]

A good catch (14/?)

On Tumblr:[Part1][Part2][Part3][Part 4][Part 5][Part 6][Part 7][Part 8][Part 9][Part 10][Part 11][Part 12],[Part 13]

Also on:AO3, fanfic

Summary: Emma Swan is happy, she has her son, a good job and plenty of friends. Killian and Liam Jones arrive and Emma must re-evaluate her happiness. But there is more going on than meets the eye in the town of Storybrooke and Emma has to get to the bottom of it, but at what cost

Chapter 14 - Sleeping Buick

The Rabbit Hole wasn’t particularly helpful, that is she didn’t learn anything new. On the bright side she took spotting Jefferson at the bar calmly, managed to shakily ask him how Grace was doing before enquiring about Charles Teach. Jefferson almost looked concerned, “Old Charlie, usually quite a regular actually. About that time he got arrested he stopped coming in, thought maybe he took it as a wake-up call.”

Emma nodded, “We think maybe he left town then, or at least that is our best guess at the moment. Has John Silver mentioned him?”

Jefferson shook his head, “No, bit quieter but I assume that’s because he misses drinking with his friend.”

“He tried to assert they were just acquaintances when we questioned him,” Emma watched as Jefferson looked at her disbelieving.

“I don’t have any friends as close as they were to each other, so unless they had a falling out...”

Emma nodded, jotting down what he said. “Thanks Jefferson, let me know if you hear anything or if Silver happens to mention anything pertinent. He is probably just sore his buddy skipped town but I need to be sure.”

Jefferson nodded absentmindedly wiping down the bar in an almost laughably stereotypical way, “Will do. And Emma it was nice to see you, y’no like normal people.”

“You count me interrogating you about a missing barfly as normal?” Emma raised an eyebrow attempting to inject some comedy.

“Perhaps not,” Jefferson admitted. “But usually if something happens on one of my shifts David turns up.”

“Oh,” it hit Emma how well protected she had been by her friends. She remembered Ruby mentioning that she usually checked before they came to the bar but this must have been a complicated dance between all her friends. She remembered how many times Mary-Margaret practically forced her to let her take Henry home, was it because Jefferson would be collecting Grace? 

She looked up to Jefferson’s chagrined expression, “You didn’t realise,” he stated.

Emma shook her head, “Guess I’m ready to face it all now.”

“I’m glad,” Jefferson added. “Anyway, catch you in front of the school gates some time?”

She laughed, “I am sure you will.”

...............................................

As per usual Mary-Margaret had outdone herself. Emma shook her head at the food that was being prepared, “You know that this is supposed to be a casual meal with friends?”

Her friend blushed, “Well I missed you so I thought I would put a little effort in, you know um... TGIF Friday.”

“The F in TGIF means Friday Mary-Margaret and please never ever say that again,” Emma laughed.

“Well I stand by missing you,” Mary-Margaret said smiling before enveloping Emma in a crushing hug. “I hate that David knows more about you than I do sometimes... do you want to talk about it?”

She leaned out of the Kitchen to spot Henry who was happily playing with Leo and David in the lounge. “I don’t want Henry to know yet.”

Mary-Margaret nodded earnestly, “Of course, does he have any idea?”

“I told him Rumplestiltskin has a connection to his father, I didn’t say that I had seen him.”

“Rumplestiltskin?”

Emma huffed, “What is the point in coming up with code names if he isn’t going to use them.”

“Oh right I suppose that makes sense, spinning straw into... well you know.” Mary-Margaret mused, “Henry came up with it then?”

Emma nodded, “of course. Thinking of Henry, his birthday. I was thinking horse riding, you know for the ‘knight in training’.”

Mary-Margaret was suitably distracted recommending the father of one of the kids in Henry’s class, but when she returned from writing down his phone number she went back to business. Now however the business was Killian Jones, so Emma told her everything. Mary-Margaret was in heaven, long had it been her ambition to set up Emma with someone much to Emma’s constant annoyance. Not only was Emma seeing someone but he was romantic, almost putting David to shame with their epic first date. Even just descriptions of their lunches had her reeling, and so with tears in her eyes she looked hopefully at Emma, “He sounds perfect Emma, finally someone who might deserve you.” Then her tone changed, “We need to have him round for dinner.”

Emma rolled her eyes, “Please calm down, I like this guy I don’t want to scare him off with you pretending to be my mother.”

Mary-Margaret playfully batted her away, “Its going to happen. Also I was planning on doing a spot of hunting next weekend, want to join?”

“You think I’m ready?” After one practice with Mary-Margaret and the bows she was finding it hard to believe she was ready to shoot something.

Mary-Margaret nodded, “You don’t have to shoot anything if you don’t want, but it might be nice to have company and its a bit hard for David to join me now with the baby and everything.”

“I’d love to, suppose David could be a babysitter then?” 

“Yay! I’ll lend you some gear and of course David will look after Henry. What trouble are they getting up to in there?”

Emma leaned back again to survey the group, “Leo appears to be part of some kind of game that involves flying him around the room like a superhero.”

Mary-Margaret’s eyes widened, visions of potential disaster flashing before her eyes, “You know forget I even asked.”

Dinner was great, she felt closer to Mary-Margaret and it was the best she could offer by way of a family for Henry. It was at the end of dinner that she noticed her little boy drifting off, “Maybe its time we take this party animal home.”

She took him home and put him to bed, he went with little protest. After tucking him in and spending much too long watching him sleep she went to the living room. She made herself a hot chocolate and curled up on the couch ready to settle in for some shitty life-time movie until she felt tired enough to sleep. Emma pulled out her phone and saw a few alerts from her security system, she hadn’t even looked at her phone at dinner. Shit, she got up and grabbed her gun. It was the sensor in her bedroom that had been activated, it was only an hour and a half ago. What if they were still here?

She went up, checking Henry’s room first careful not to disturb him. Last thing he needed was his Mom panicking him over nothing, with a gun in her hand no less. That room was all clear so she went to the bedroom, to most people it would look untouched but Emma knew better. She was a little messy but she had a very good memory and her mess had been disturbed. She walked around carefully checking any hiding places before exhaling deeply, whoever was here had definitely left. She calmly checked her hiding spot for all the documents related to the case, it had not been disturbed. She replaced the box and made sure it was secure before going downstairs. She checked the feed from the camera’s on her phone.

Sure enough she saw a figure enter her window on the camera, deftly making their way around her room while disturbing very little. They were thorough, hood up the whole time and wearing black gloves, they checked most of the places people leave valuables before going downstairs. Disturbingly the figure spent quite a long time standing at the entrance to Henry’s room, they didn’t enter probably weighing up the probability that anyone would hide anything in their kid’s room and deciding not. The figure went down the stairs conducting a search quickly and carefully but obviously coming up with nothing. This was no burglar that was for sure. They even pulled out her laptop, and spent quite some time on it before putting it away. Did this mean they were able to get past its security? Their only mistake was when they had finished their search, the figure stood outside Henry’s room once again, then pulled out their phone, in the process the hood fell down. They turned talking animatedly on the phone to someone and she saw their face. She swore out loud. It was Neal, he had been in her loft... and now he knew about Henry. Would he put two and two together?

Emma was suddenly very afraid, the very thing she had been worried about, what if he wanted Henry? She didn’t know what to do, didn’t know how to process this, this was never supposed to be a reality. Why couldn’t she have bumped into him again and have him be reformed, moved on and maybe even with someone. Instead he was the same... maybe worse, the reality was she had no way of knowing. 

Emma didn’t sleep, or at least she drifted off for all of five minutes before Henry was standing over her, “Why are you sleeping here? And why are you still in your clothes?”

Emma stretched her head pounding from lack of sleep, “I just couldn’t sleep kid. Do you mind putting on some coffee for me?”

“Okay,” Henry said slowly, clearly completely unconvinced.

She rubbed her eyes then called David quickly as she heard Henry banging around in the kitchen. 

“Hey Emma.”

“Hey David, I have a problem.”

“What is it?” his voice full of concern.

Emma sighed, “Neal was here last night, I caught it.  He was searching my place, he didn’t find out anything about the case but...”

“Henry,” David interrupted.

“Yeah well he knows he exists now, who knows what else. What the hell do I do?” Panic seeped into her voice.

David was quiet for a beat, “What can we do? I mean we just have to make sure someone is always with him, his window is bolted right?”

“So was mine, it didn’t stop Neal. He is a cat burglar since way back, I used to help him for gods sake. I’ll look into it though at least for his window.”

“What about camp, I mean Mary-Margaret will be there, you and I both know she could protect him and do you really want to pull him out?”

Emma felt sick, “I want to yes absolutely, but he will hate me and the only reason he was here was me  and this investigation. He is just as much at risk if I keep him here.”

“So yes to camp and no more Henry wandering off when he likes?”

“No, I’ll let Regina know.” Emma wished she could expand the circle of people who knew about this but it was too risky.

“Are you okay?” David asked hesitantly.

“I spent the whole night sitting on the couch running through every worst case scenario, I must have checked on Henry fifty times. At least we can get Neal for breaking and entering right?.”

David’s response mimicked her own feelings, “Its just not worth it.”

Just then Henry came in the room completely covered in flour, “Mom I might need your help, you feel like pancakes?”

Emma laughed despite how shitty she was feeling, “Gotta go David. I’ll be in in a second Henry.”

“Its going to be okay Emma,” David reassured.

“I hope so,” Emma replied gloomily before putting down the phone and going into the kitchen to help Henry.

She tried to forget, really she did. But she felt like she was on the edge of a heart attack all weekend, not once was Henry out of her sight, except for bathroom breaks and sleep times (that would be a step too far). She tried to act normal and happy, and although a part of her was always happy to spend time with her son she was mentally and physically exhausted by the end of the day. They spent an inordinate amount of time in the hardware store as Emma tried to figure out the best way to make his window more secure. And Emma even managed a small smile when she demonstrated to him why she needed to improve the lock on his window by breaking into his room when the window was locked. Worryingly she had never seen him more proud of her, after she fixed the window she even taught him how to pick a lock, with of course the strict proviso that this skill was only to be used for good and not evil. 

If Henry noticed her overprotectiveness he kept it to himself, even when he found her sleeping on an armchair outside his door because she couldn’t stand to leave him unguarded. Camp was certainly going to be fun. 

Killian had been texting her all weekend, he had cottoned on that something was wrong from her useless monosyllabic answers but he hadn’t got annoyed or made her tell him. Instead sending her ridiculous animal pictures and marvel memes some of which she had shared with Henry. It might have been what got Henry to let her weird behaviour slide, that even when she was obviously worried about something she wasn’t pushing Killian away. 

“So you and Killian are like a thing now?” Henry prodded.

Emma raised an eyebrow, “You might have to be a little more specific.”

“Like... y’no.... together like in love and stuff.”

Emma snorted in a not so very ladylike manner, “Jumping a little ahead of me there kid.” She smiled at her blushing son, “I like Killian, I like spending time with him. I hope maybe one day I can call it that but in the end you are the number one man in my life.”

Henry rolled his eyes at her, “I didn’t mean it like that. I’m happy for you Mom, you’re getting better, letting people in. Even with whatever is happening it the moment.” He looked at her with a knowing smirk she couldn’t help but attribute to Neal. “Sleeping outside my room is a crazy move even for you, you don’t have to tell me if you can’t. I trust you.”

“Please stay like this forever,” she kissed his head. She marvelled at his understanding,  she couldn’t really compare Henry to herself. By his age she had learned to be automatically distrusting of all adults, something that had stayed with her. Not one to give herself kudos, she was glad he felt safe and happy enough to have that attitude as much as it scared her. She started to prepare dinner, “So if I tell you Mary-Margaret might be a smidge hover-y at camp you won’t hate me?”

“I couldn’t,” he said confidently before he narrowed his eyes at her, “How bad is she going to be?”

They both laughed. After Dinner was simmering away Emma helped Henry to pack his bag reading off the schools recommended list but adding some pop-tarts and candy to keep him going, his hyperactivity was not going to be her problem she sniggered. 

.....................................

When Emma dropped Henry off at school she waited until they started to file on to the bus, giving him an embarrassing kiss goodbye before going to talk to Mary-Margaret who was diligently directing students to the right bus. “I assume David talked to you?”

Mary-Margaret nodded, “I will make sure that he is always with someone Emma. I will do all I can.”

“Half of me wants to just take him home.”

Mary-Margaret was momentarily distracted telling a student where to take their duffel. When she looked back at Emma she could see the empathy in her eyes, “Can you guarantee it would be any safer? He broke in for information right?”

Emma nodded, “I can’t, and he did. Henry is a smart kid.”

“You are his mother so I assume he is kinda prepared.”

“I told him what to watch out for, so he is prepared as much as someone can be not knowing what they are supposed to be afraid of... if in doubt scream bloody murder.” Emma shook her head remembering Henry deciding the best way to show its effectiveness was by demonstrating in the apartment last night.

“We will keep him safe Emma.”

“I know,” Emma smiled as brightly as she could. “Its probably going to be nothing.”

Mary-Margaret nodded before getting caught up in a flurry of students. Emma waved as she left, “Have fun!”

She got some coffee for herself and David before trudging up to the office. David looked at her sympathetically, “You okay?”

“Its not even all this,” she said gesturing to the station. “That’s just icing on the cake. Its just missing him for a week, a whole week David. I get withdrawal after a weekend.”

“Believe me I get it, but selfishly part of my issues might be the extra child care.”

“I can bring dinner over tomorrow of you like?”

David smirked, “No romantic plans with Killian.”

“Not tomorrow.” She said cryptically. Truthfully they had plans Wednesday night. She was on call tonight and on Thursday just in case something happened, it rarely did. So she had two nights to fret about what Wednesday meant.

“Well then, I would be very glad of your company and food tomorrow. I am sure Leo will be too.”

Emma smiled and got to work distracting herself from her empty house, every so often she would reassure herself how much fun Henry must be having. Emma had never been on a school camp before, no-one was going to pay for a foster kid or group home brat to go.  She once almost went camping, before that family sent her back to the group home... but she imagined it would be amazing. Emma was sure she would be hearing all about its amazingness in a few days. 

The thought buoyed her through the day until she went home, to a quiet house, which normally wouldn’t bother her. Quiet being kind of a commodity for a single mom but knowing there was four nights of this was a bit tough. Emma reheated some leftovers and sat herself in front of the TV, catching up on her Netflix queue. After dinner she turned her attention to her investigation, it was just background really comparing logs from shipments that she actually had to store inventory. Tedious work and not exactly helpful. She was happy for the distraction when Killian began to text.

K: Not too lonely I hope?

She sighed at her empty living room, she was struggling not to just give up and call Henry but the reassuring text she got from Mary-Margaret about half an hour ago was keeping her sane, slightly. 

E: MM tells me he is having fun. Me... not so much

K:Anything I could do ;)

Emma scoffed out loud at his suggestion, able to perfectly picture the look on his face as if he was saying it in person.

E: What are you doing?

K: Waiting for a certain woman to just give in. Liam left this morning.

E:I’m on call so you may get kicked out at any time...

His response was practically instant.

K: on my way

Emma thought she may injure her cheeks for smiling, it wasn’t even ten minutes later she heard a knock on the door. She opened the door and they stood for a minute just smiling at each other before Emma yanked him in by the lapels of his leather jacket and started to kiss him. She didn’t look fancy, a loose braid, some leggings and her favourite baggy top. But if he had even noticed he didn’t care, pushing her up against one of the support beams and briefly releasing her mouth so he could kiss a line up her jaw to her ear. She moaned when he found the spot behind her ear that drove her mad, making him pull back with a satisfied smirk before kissing her quickly and hard on the mouth once more. 

He pulled back and somewhat breathily spoke, “If we are not careful love you are going to ruin all my plans for Wednesday.”

She ignored him kissing him again with fervour one hands toying with the thatch of chest hair exposed by the buttons on his shirt the other the hair at the nape of his neck. When she had him good and riled Emma pulled back. “Well it wouldn’t be good to be compromised if I get called in.”

“Minx, “ Killian said with a smirk.

She laughed, “So should we just curl up on the couch and watch something?”

Killian smiled, “I suppose so love.”

Emma let him pick something to watch and she grabbed some snacks. When she put them down on the coffee table he patted the seat beside him and before she knew it she was curled up against him with her head tucked under his chin. It was all painfully domestic... and kind of wonderful. 

“So how was your day?” She felt him press a kiss to her head as he asked.

She sighed, “Nothing to write home about. Missing Henry even before I would have seen him anyway.”

“He is a lucky lad.”

She snorted, “Why?”

“Both of us understand why love, he is lucky to have a mum like you to miss him. And you are a brilliant mum by the way.” 

She turned to look up at him, as if checking he wasn’t making fun of her. She frowned, “You can’t really know that.”

“You think I’m taking the piss love, well I assure you I am not. You forget I have seen you with the lad, heard you talk about him, heard him talk about you. You are bloody brilliant.”

She couldn’t help but kiss him, needing to both thank him and tamp down the rising emotion. She ended up completely turned round straddling him and there she stayed having what could only be described as a teenager-esque make-out session. When they finally pulled away giggling slightly at the ridiculousness of it all, Killian cupped her cheek. “I think I could do that all night.”

“Are you sure I can’t tempt you into something more? You know I don’t need candles and romance Killian. And I don’t know whether you can tell..” She leant forward brushing her nose against his ear, “But I really want you.”

She could barely see the blue in his eyes, his pupils blown so wide then the onslaught of kisses all over her face and neck had her laughing (and gasping), “Just for that I am going to make you wait, forget minx I think I meant siren.”

They continued to watch the movie they had completely lost track of, and by the end Emma happily accepted Killian’s offer to stay, she had after all fallen asleep draped across his lap anyway. 

.....................

While the next morning Emma was fairly chipper, waking up in Kilian’s arms was very nice indeed. Coupled with the phone call she got from Henry which although short assured her he was having the best time ever, the same couldn’t be said for David. He looked like a man who had no know sleep in the past 24 hours.

 “Rough night?” Emma observed.

He rubbed his eyes, “He sensed my weakness and he exploited it. Unfortunately he gets to sleep the day away at day-care while I have to work.”

“They are pure evil at his age, Henry used to sense when I had a big day coming up. Perfect sleeper the rest of the time.”

“Mary-Margaret laughed, said I would appreciate her more now. I don’t know how you did it by yourself. I love Leo but he almost had me at the point of crying.”

“I don’t miss that,” Emma remembered being so tired and frustrated and alone she cried on her shitty kitchen floor begging Henry to just sleep, feeling like a complete failure and without someone to reassure her it was all going to be fine. “Did you want me to stay tonight, let you get a proper sleep?”

David smiled, “Only if you are sure.”

“Completely,” Emma replied confidently. “Anyway Henry called this morning, having the time of his life”

......................................

Later that day Emma joined David and baby Leo, Pasta bake in hand. One day and somehow the house looked like a bomb had hit it. After raising an eyebrow at the scene before her David began to tidy up while Leo played on his mat and Emma reheated the food. Dinner was nice and long after David sat down on the couch after putting Leo down to bed he himself was out like a light. Emma put away the dishes, covered him with a blanket and went into the spare room getting out her book and reading until she herself actually felt like sleeping. 

Leo certainly wasn’t in the mood for sleep when he started balling at one in the morning. Emma groaned and got up picking up the little man and rocking him gently in her arms. It turned out that soothing crying babies was something you never quite forgot. The wailing had woken David up too and he stumbled in looking dishevelled. Emma shook her head, “I got this, go get some sleep.”

He nodded, too tired to argue. Emma chuckled as he shuffled off to bed whispering to the calming baby in her arms, “He has had it too good for too long huh little one.”

To be fair Leo went back to sleep after that and when Emma went into his room at around six he was sitting up quite awake as if waiting for someone to come and get him. She scooped him up in her arms nuzzling his nose with hers, “You done torturing your Dad now little man.”

She took the baby into the kitchen and put him in his high chair while she made breakfast, occasionally chatting to the little boy. When David came in she was attempting to feed him some of the homemade baby food from the fridge while sipping at her coffee. David smiled at the two of them and Emma pointed at the pot, “Coffee is hot.”

“I can’t tell you how much I owe you for this, I feel like a different man.”

Emma shrugged, “He was only up the once.” She tuned to the chubby bubba in the chair and started to talk to him bopping him on the nose as she talked in typical baby voice, “Not nearly as evil as Henry, no no you aren’t.”

David laughed as he poured himself a cup of coffee, eyes widening as he noticed the bacon buttie on the bench. “You have shown me up completely.”

Emma shrugged, “I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy it a little, I miss Henry being that little sometimes... not all the time obviously. But the older he gets the less he is going to need me, and he is kinda all I have.”

“Well that’s a lie if I ever heard one,” David said clearly unimpressed.

Emma shrugged, “You know what I mean, I love you guys and you are pretty much family but at the end of the day you have a family.”

David shook his head, “Sometimes I wonder what goes on in that head of yours. I promise you whether Henry goes to college on the other side of the country or moves away I will always be here for you, always.”

Emma nodded, “I wasn’t fishing for anything.”

“I know which is all the more frustrating, don’t you say anything like that to Mary-Margaret.”

Her heart clenched at the thought, she hadn’t meant to be hurtful but inevitably that is what it would be. She bit the inside of her cheek, self-pity felt awfully selfish sometimes. David didn’t hold it against her, “At any rate Henry isn’t going anywhere for a while, Leo make you clucky at all?” 

She raised an eyebrow, “Don’t you start on me too.”

He held up his hands pleading innocence, “I said nothing. Just innocently enquiring.”

“If I’m honest David I hadn’t thought I would have opportunity. I wouldn’t do it on my own again that’s for sure but until... I mean I didn’t think I would... Its too early to think about anyway.”

David was smiling at her wiping brown sauce from his mouth as he chewed a mouthful of his sandwich, basically letting her dig a hole. “So what you are saying is with the right person...”

“Maybe, yeah. If I found the right person then maybe.”

Her red face and admission seemed to placate him but she didn’t miss his amused grin as he finished his sandwich then got Leo ready for day-care. Emma couldn’t even believe the conversation had taken place, how she had entertained the idea at all. She felt a little sick, how had she got this deep? She left the house as fast as she could. Tonight she had a date with Killian, she needed to stop these thoughts from plaguing her all day, needed to stop imagining Killian as more than he was at the moment. They hadn’t even slept together for fucks sake.

She decided a hot chocolate would make her feel better so she stopped at Granny’s to grab herself one as well as a coffee for David and Lance who was back in today after a weekend with his friend Arthur in a town called Camelot about an hours drive away. He would no doubt be a grump today as he often was after visiting. She told him once to cut his losses and leave, she couldn’t understand why he would put his heart through the assault that was being in love with your best friends wife with no intention of doing anything about it. He had merely shook his head, spouting some nonsense about them needing him, that he couldn’t do it to either of them.

In truth Lance looked worse than usual she gently placed the cup of hot coffee in front of him, “Rough weekend?”

He looked up at her guiltily, “Sometimes Emma I wish I was strong enough to say no.” He noticed the cup, “Oh god you are a life-saver. I don’t think I deserve your kindness, self imposed misery and all.”

She shrugged, “Just don’t tell anyone, I have a reputation to uphold.”

He chuckled softly and she went to place David’s coffee on his desk, he hadn’t made it in yet. When she looked back he had a faraway look in his eye, he took a sip of coffee then looked down at the cup like he was almost... upset. Emma frowned, she was sure that was how he took it, soy because he was a little lactose intolerant and with a shot of hazelnut. 

 Not long after David came in, yelling a quick thanks from his office, they got a call from a neighbouring towns sheriff, saying they may have found Charles Teach’s car. The town in question called Briarwood was over an hour away, Emma and Lance got the pleasure of going out there. They pulled up outside a little sheriffs station in a standalone building on the main drag. There were a few police cars outside and judging by the look of the town as they drove in it was a little more populated than Storybrooke or at least a lot bigger. The woman at the desk, a portly older lady who was knitting a ghastly pink confection turned her perfectly coiffed white hair and yelled for “PHILIP!” before turning back to them and regarding them from her half-moon spectacles as if she wasn’t convinced by the badges they had proffered already. 

Philip materialised quite quickly shaking his head, “Mary you could call my phone, or send them through.” He was English, a soft posh accent. She couldn’t help but compare it to Killian’s and decide it was not nearly as nice.

He looked at the two of them quizzically, Lance leaned forward hand outstretched, “Hi I’m Lance Knight and this is Emma Swan, we are the deputies from Storybrooke.”

Recognition dawned on his and he shook Lance’s hand before doing the same to Emma, it was a firm handshake which made Emma like him at least a little more. “Sorry Mary should have sent you right through, should I just show you the vehicle first?”

“First?” Emma frowned.

Philip went to open his mouth then closed it wiggling his head around like he was weighing something up, “Yeah its easier if I just show you. You want a ride or just want to follow?”

Emma made the decision before Lance could open his mouth, “We will follow thanks.”

Philip led them just out of town before turning onto a dirt road trail before stopping the car. They parked behind him and got out, he walked to the side of the road and pointed at the undergrowth. Within it you could just make out the back of a car. “A local noticed it on the weekend, they checked there wasn’t anyone in it but otherwise left it.”

Emma hopped down the ditch at the side of the road before climbing up into the bush to inspect it closer, “There aren’t any plates, how did you figure out it was Teach’s?”

She could hear the smugness in his voice, “Ahh well, there is no plate or registration but under one of the seats was an old receipt for the registration and we ran it through the computer and the alert came up.”

Emma nodded to herself before climbing into the car, growth around the car made it look like it had been there for a few weeks and inside there wasn’t much in there to write home about. To all intents and purposes the car had been cleared out, not very well it seems. She yelled out the open car door, “Aside from the receipt, you guys bag up anything else?”

“There wasn’t anything to bag up really, it even looked clean.” His voice was getting closer and he appeared at the car door, “I wouldn’t have thought much of it really, just some idiot dumping a car except...” He leaned forward and pointed at the dash where she could see scratched plastic then ignored most polite rules of personal space and flicked open the hood. Excitedly he got out not talking again until he was at the front of the car, “For those.”

Emma sighed at his enthusiasm and got out to see was he was talking about, there too was just scratch marks, “someone got rid of the VIN numbers so it would be hard to identify.”

“Exactly,” Philip said looking immensely proud of himself, “I thought it was a bit more effort than people usually go to so I searched the car and found the receipt, it was partially hidden by the carpet in the car.”

Emma bit back a sarcastic remark about his superior investigation skills instead nodding, “Has the area around here been searched?”

“For what?” Philip frowned.

“The guy who owned the car, who skipped out on his court date. Asked around town or in the immediate area?”

Philip shook his head, “Figured if he dumped it, he wasn’t going to stick around.”

“Probably but best to check, mind if we do or would you rather?”

Phillip shook his head, “No problem, I can help.”

Emma smiled, he was obviously a good guy. Emma needed to learn to be a little more forgiving, if this town was as dull as Storybrooke, Gold excluded, she would almost be as enthused at even a little detective work. Philip offered to ask at the properties closest to the car and Emma and Lance headed back to town. 

“What do you think?” Lance asked.

Emma pouted thinking it through, “I don’t know. I don’t think Teach was exactly flush with cash so dumping a perfectly good car was an odd choice, why not sell it and get some money for another. I mean the alert only went up last week, he could have sold it with no issue anytime before that. But that’s just what I would do, Charles Teach isn’t me.”

Lance nodded, “He must have had a ride already lined up then.

“Unless he didn’t leave.” 

Emma didn’t mean to sound morbid but the murders following Gold around had her thinking a certain way. Lance didn’t seem to take it that way anyway, “I can’t imagine he is stupid enough to be hanging around here.”

They went into every shop and restaurant, no one had any recollection of seeing Teach. When they went into the bar Lance went to use the restroom, Emma questioned the bartender. “Have you by any chance seen this man?” 

Emma held up Teach’s photo, the man shook his head. She went on the describe his manner, his car and why they were looking for him but to no avail. On a whim Emma pulled up an old photo of John Silver from his Facebook page, “What about this guy?”

The man frowned, Emma showed him a few more photo’s. The man nodded, “Yeah, miserable guy. Held his liquor well until he didn’t. Had to have him kicked out, almost called the police but he seemed like he had a bad enough day.”

She got his contact information in case she needed to call him, then walked outside waiting for Lance. She called David, “Hey we have his car it was cleaned out, someone tried to remove all the identification but did a sloppy job. The deputy here found a receipt and traced it back to our man”

Lance came out and she mouthed ‘David’ to him, he motioned that he would meet her at the sheriffs station, as he walked away she started talking again. “No-one in town recognised him, the Briarwood deputy is checking the properties around where the car was dumped but it looks like it was a while ago.”

“I can feel a but coming on,” David replied.

“But I asked the bartender if he had seen Silver on a bit of a whim, and he had.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, drunk and miserable was his description.”

“Hmm, well we will have to follow that up then. It doesn’t seem likely that Silver hasn’t seen him but managed to be in the exact town that his car got dumped.” She heard shuffling papers in the background, “Talk to Silver tomorrow, might be worth bringing him in actually.”

“Will do boss, we are probably going to head back now assuming that Philip the sheriff here doesn’t have any major news.” Emma doubted it, she had a feeling in her gut that didn’t bode well.

She meandered back to the sheriffs station, this time the lady at the desk let her through and she walked in to the main office. Lance was talking to Philip, she joined them but neither looked happy. “I talked to a few of the properties, no-one saw anything. They remember the car turning up a few weeks ago but hadn’t got round to doing anything about it.”

Emma  nodded, “It was good work, finding us.” She looked at Lance and for the weirdest reason decided not to tell him about Silver, he would find out tomorrow anyway. “We should be going anyway, nice to meet you Sheriff.”

She shook his hand again, “I’ll let you know if anything else turns up.”

Lance followed her out, “So another dead end?”

“Another piece of the puzzle I guess, hey I don’t know why but I have this feeling something bad might have happened to Teach.”

He looked surprised for a second, then his face showed a hint of anger, it was gone before she could really register what it was and whether it was even directed at her. “You think someone might have hurt him?”

“I don’t know but it just doesn’t feel right. I’ll look into any vehicle purchases in the area but...”

The ride back was okay, Lance recounted his weekend in excruciating detail. She merely shook her head at him while feeling more and more guilty about not telling him everything. It was pretty much home time when they got back and nervousness started to creep up on Emma. It was date night finally and it was of course stupid to be nervous. Only two nights ago they fell asleep in each others arms, but this was different, deliberate. And the anticipation was killing her, or more accurately if had turned her insides into a rolling storm, her mind into a tornado of worst case scenarios.  David winked at her as he wished her a good night, she merely scowled in return. Showtime.

#cs ff #cs ff au #cs fanfics #a good catch #enjoy