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anincompletelist · 6 months

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weekend wip game! :D

thank you thank you @daisymae-12 for the tag, I SO enjoyed reading through your current projects (and everyone else's that have been floating around!) I have so many of my own that I scream about privately but I suppose I can do it publicly as well with the right persuasion (this. definitely this.) anyway -

PLEASE feel free to do this and tag me if you haven't already. I LOVE reading about yall's current projects! <3 (also much love to @welcometololaland for creating this fun game!)

I hope you're all doing well! :D

-- anincompletelist/sarah

Rules: List your WIPs below (if you only write one fic at a time, feel free to include future WIPs/ideas!) then answer the following questions. Then, tag as many people as you have WIPs (or more). (questions for artists/gifmakers here).

1. WIP List:

[hitman alex / prince henry au]

poetry fic (literally SO much poetry this is my Baby) [computer science major alex/english major + poet henry]

coworkers/fake dating au (part of firstprince first kisses)

[journalist+escort alex/prince henry]

boxer alex au / snippet here

truman show au [henry as truman/alex as lauren] !!! partially in script format

dog walker alex au (feat. DAVID!)

abdication au [lawyer alex] LOTS of family drama/henry angst and most of it takes place on a TRAIN which for some reason to me makes it so much more intriguing

drunk dial au [based on 'dial drunk' by noah kahan - canon divergent - years after the worst breakup of either of their lives, alex manages to get himself arrested during a trip to london and the only person he can think to call is henry, his ex. (things work out, of course. I am incapable of writing unhappy endings)]

bridesmaids au (june is getting married, brother alex and best friend henry are her (rival) ‘best men’/bridesmen who are always trying to compete to give her the best wedding possible)

lots of other little drabbles and oneshots -- honestly this list grows every day but these are the main ones!!

2. Which of your WIPs is currently the longest?

poetry fic!

3. Which WIP do you expect will end up the longest?

poetry for sure, but truman fic is a close second!

4. Which WIP is your favourite to write/the most enjoyable to write? Why?

it definitely changes day-to-day, even though it stresses me out to have a lot of projects going at once (skjhdjhs) I enjoy being able to switch around between them and write whatever I'm in the mood for!

5. Which WIP do you find the most intimidating to write? Why?

probably truman au. I have big plans for it and I've fleshed out the characters really well and I feel like the trope is PERFECT for alex&henry and it (to my knowledge) hasn't been done before so! I want to do them justice. also it's surpassingly fun to write scenes in script format!!!

6. Which WIP do you experience the most self-doubt about. Why?

all of them, to a degree (the universal Creative Experience). but I think poetry fic? it deals with some heavier themes and the characters are so special to me (it also deals with a lot of my own personal struggles and features some of my own poetry) so I worry about it being perceived well or being relatable to other people.

7. Which of your WIPs will you seek out a beta/sensitivity reader for? Why?

I'm not sure if I will! when I wrote in other fandoms I had a lovely friend that would look them over for me and we'd talk about them, but they don't write for this fandom and I overthink SO much that if someone gives me criticism I may just scrap the entire scene sjkhkjhd. I kind of just post and hope for the best!

8. Have any of your WIPs been struck by the curse of writer's block?

on a steady rotation :D perks of having so many wips that I can just switch it up when I get stuck!

9. Which WIP has your favourite OC? Tell us about them?

I'm fully aware I sound like a broken record but definitely poetry fic. i can’t say too much without giving away some of the plot but he’s an older man who can relate to henry in a lot of ways and kind of becomes a part of their story <3 he’s only in a couple of scenes but they’re so important to the story!

10. Which WIP is the sexiest?

hitman alex for SURE, but journalist/escort is definitely a close second.

11. Which WIP is the angstiest?

oh gosh, it's between hitman / abdication / poetry / boxer / and truman ?? but honestly I can't write anything without a little angst, so! I feel like there's so many elements to their dynamic that are just perfect for it (with mandatory happy ending of course)!

12. Which WIP has the best characterisation (in your humble opinion)?

most accurate? probably poetry fic. most fun to write? hitman.

13. Which WIP has the best scene setting (in your humble opinion)?

POETRY!!! it's literally the personification of autumn and warm blankets and falling leaves and old books and alex's cinnamon coffee (of course) and Henry runs a poetry club and they're both so soft and ugh it's just the best ever and I wish I could live in it. (in my own humble opinion).

14. Which WIP have you worked the hardest on?

as far as research goes, definitely poetry.

15. Which WIP do you have the highest expectations for? Why?

I'm not really sure. I wrote in another fandom that I always felt like everything I posted had to cater to who was going to read it and it's been extremely liberating to write for RWRB and just post what *I* like or would want to read. I don't really care about hits, but my biggest hope with anything I post is always that it makes someone else feel seen/heard/validated or brightens their day/night a little, the way that so many other fics/art have for me. <3

16. Do you dream about any of your WIPs?

YES. I have the angstiest dreams and anytime I hurt my own feelings I wake up and write it down immediately. (ESPECIALLY with hitman and journalist recently).

17. Do any of your WIPs have particular complexities that your other fics don't?

truman au for sure. it's written in alex's pov and we only see henry through script format for the first half. I'm really excited about it, I've never written anything like it before and I think it adds such a cool element to the story (if I can figure out how to format it correctly on ao3 jhskdhj - we'll cross that bridge when we get there I suppose).

18. Which WIP is the funniest or has the most humour?

coworkers and dogwalker I would consider to be 'funny' fics -- lots of banter and joking with each other and general lightheartedness!

19. Do any of your WIPs contain outside POVs or a deep dive on a character other than the main ship? How are you finding that process?

not currently, but I LOVED writing June's character in this fic because I have a chronic illness myself and I liked getting to explore it from an outside perspective! I also would love to explore a bit more with henry's dad and their storyline at some point as well.

20. Tell us one thing we don't know about one or more of your WIPs.

here, have THREE!

henry's poetry club in poetry fic is called 'speak easy' and is held in an old speakeasy lounge

in the hitman fic, alex goes by the codename Ander in public

abdication au is inspired by a five minute scene in a james bond film that takes place on a train and just spun out from there kjshdjhs

YAY that was so much fun, thank you again for tagging me @daisymae-12 , had a super bad chronic illness day the last several days so this has been such a fun and much welcome distraction.

I don't have a lot of people that I know of that haven't done this, but off the top of my head -- @inexplicablymine (I know you shared wips but I'd love to hear more detail if you're interested in sharing!) @onward--upward @firstprincewrites @magicandarchery @sparklepocalypse and anyone else who comes across this post!

again, there's NO pressure at ALL but I would love to hear what y'all are working on and just what you're up to in general!

I hope all of you guys are doing well, I'm so ridiculously grateful for all of the work you guys put out and the difference that you make. have a wonderful weekend and take care! :D

#my fic #rwrb fic #rwrb fanfiction #tagged

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mingyus-blackcard · 6 months

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ੈ✩‧₊ Red Rose ੈ✩‧₊

Pairing : Choi Seungcheol x Male reader

Words : 1.0k

Genre : Angst, Idol au

TW : Angst, heartbreak, Seungcheol is a jerk, Toxic relationship, reader is insecure, hate mentioned due to fans

Music: 0x1 Lovesong by TXT

A/N : This was requested .

“Never knew I would love hating you Seungcheol.” Y/N huffed between breaths, crushed underneath the weight of his boyfriend who was mercilessly tickling him.

“Aw, you don’t mean that dear lover boy. Guess who just earned more punishment.” Seuncheol replied before going on his top mission to kill his boyfriend by tickling him to death.

“Keeping you to myself is a punishment itself, no need for you to increase it.”

Seungcheol halted his tickling session and stared at his boyfriend, contemplating before making himself comfortable on his boyfriend’s waist, just like the many times of their not so freaky sessions.

“You don’t mean that now.”

“I am competing with millions of people out their for you, maybe some royal princess or a millionaire as well!”

“I am a millionaire myself, you know?”

"A millionaire which can't afford to fall in love."

"A millionaire who would rather buy this juicy ass right in front of him."

“How do you manage to insert the funniest of things during the most serious times?”

“I am a songwriter. I write what I experience, and currently you are just stopping me from making the next hit song.”

"Leave the writing for Woozi ok?"

"I write pretty decent too you you know ?"

"I never said you dont ."

"Your extremely educated ass said so ."

“Your fans will hate you for being in a relationship, yet alone a guy-”

“We have been together for 2 years now”

"2 years which have been the best, I know that but-"

"You mean a lot more to me than my idol life, you are my number one priority." Seungcheol replied while cupping his boyfriend's face and looking into those orbs which made him belive in love at first sight.

“Your fandom is just- , I can’t even find the correct adjective to describe it despite being a English major.” Y/N chuckled.

"Even if these little escapades of us get leaked, I will turn them into a lifetime. "

"Easy for you to say so."

"You know what will be better , taking you to Cartier and getting you a ring, maybe we could use Mingyu as a discount."

"And you say you are a millionaire?"

“i say what I say and I mean you only said this- ‘the older the book the better it is’, so just like Romeo and Juliet, we will be together every life time, every eternity, be it me being an idol with million fans or a beggar begging for your love.”

“You somehow convince me too well” Y/N replied while leaning in to hug Seuncheol, which he gladly turned into a cuddle session, making sure his boyfriend is comfortable before going to sleep himself.

Despite being uneasy, Y/N comforted himself with the embrace of his lover and tried to settle the overwhelming thoughts he was having. The last thing his brain said to him was “Romeo and Juliet never had a happy ending.”

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

And his brain was right. They never did.

2 years of their actual moments and turned into bitter memories. Y/N was crushed by Seuncheol. Seuncheol broke the only promise he ever made.

One morning changed everything , the songs didn’t make him remind of Seuncheol. The romantic plays didn’t make him feel butterflies, the movies watched together seemed forgotten, the heart which beated fastly for the coloured life, slowly dimming into monotonous colours of black and white.

Seungcheol left him for his career. A career filled with success running after them. Each album shattered the previous records, shows were begging to have Seventeen, magazines were kneeling in front of Pledis to let the group grace their covers. They were the biggest thing around the world. Y/N would have been a part of it , yet here he was, sitting in his apartment alone, watching Seuncheol give the speech for accepting the Daesang.

And all this happened because of those stupid flowers he asked Seungcheol to get, Red roses, his favourite flowers.

Seuncheol was caught in picture by dispatch while picking up the flowers from the florist. While picking up flowers may seem innocent, him getting in his car and driving to a stranger's house and returning with no flowers didn't. The Korean media blew up with scandal, who was the mystery girl who had caught the biggest boy group's leader heart. Little do they know it was a boy, studying to become a journalist, who wanted nothing but love from boyfriend and was waiting for him to come back with the flowers as motivation for his upcoming exams. Dispatch blew this whole thing up by posting every detail, even adding false details to make it more scandalous.

Yet Y/N knew, Seungcheol won't give on them just because they got exposed. He will come out with the truth and accept his relationship in public. But he was proved wrong, Seungcheol choose his career over him. Seungcheol of course contemplated but then decided that it was the best for them, best for him, to rather deny it and break up with the girl, not letting the media know that it was a guy. He didn't even have the guts to face Y/N as his company had made Seungcheol sign a non-disclosure act about his relationship, and sent a restraining order over to Y/N, telling him legal actions would be taken if he is to be in contact with Seungcheol. The only legal document he wanted with Seungchoel was a marriage certificate not this.

Seungcheol got his number changed, which Y/N got to know after he tried calling him multiple times only to finally get the server voice saying this number is not in service anymore. All those moments, all those memories just vanished in a moment, without even letting them a farewell. Ever since Seungcheol left, he forgot what it felt like to be loved, to be wanted, to be happy. Seungcheol was a feeling which he could never replace, even though Seungcheol had moved on, living his life to the fullest, world tours, clubbing, money, brand ambassadoring while Y/N was discarded, discarded like the beats in Seungcheol’s mind.

The roses were still on the table of Y/N’s room, dried up like his heart. He tried to bloom again, yet his mind said every time,

“ You hate how much you love him.”

Sequel : Black Rose

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struggle-but-its-all-ocean-floor · 7 months

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"The way Big Hit lets BTS collab with problematic or not very well respected artists is insane. It's like they'll take anyone and don't even bother understanding what fans want."

This. I’m honestly quite baffled Hybe does not seem to bother doing a quick background check on the artists they collab with. Or they just don’t care? Jungkook doesn’t seem to mind so… Imo it doesn’t mesh very well with BTS’ message, the core values they stand for, and why so many of us fell in love with them. It was so nice to see artists setting an example, not behaving outrageously, acknowledging their past mistakes and trying not to repeat them. It felt sincere and a breath of fresh air in the pop music industry, as least for me. It’s really not that hard to find good artists out there who haven’t said crazy stuff and acting up in all kind of stupid ways, or is it? I have to admit I don’t really follow the US music scene now, it seems so full of narcissistic posers competing for popularity by behaving like total dumbasses and thinking they’re so edgy and rebellious and cool. I’m passed the age for that. I just quite don’t understand what’s the end goal exactly, apart from just making big $$$ on the moment. They’re trying to make a name for Jungkook himself on the western side, sure, I get this, but it feels desperate. It’s going all over the place, with the 4th collab for him coming, as if he could not do well on his own? Are they trying to built an audience for his first solo single on Golden? Does he really needed all this beforehand? It feels like a waste of time and talent to me, the industry moves extra fast and it’s always chasing for the next big name and next hit when Jungkook will be gone for 18 months soon anyway and 3D will be another mediocre song in the trashcans of the pop music history… As you said it’s like they’re accepting collabs after collabs without putting too much thoughts into it. It’s a good move for Latto, Harlow & co, is it really for Jungkook for the future? But if it’s what he wants… It doesn’t seem like a good strategy on the long term, but I’m no marketer so what do I even know. Maybe I’m just saying bs. What’s for sure is that this current strategy is not working on me and I’m far from being the only one it seems… Sorry my English is a bit rusty and I probably sound like a broken record as I know you have already talked about it a lot and many anons shared a similar opinion.

Also I was just thinking, about collabs: listening to Troye Sivan’s last song, I feel like a collab with him could have been one with potential for something a bit different and audacious. But I’m totally biased, I love his music and I think he’s such a sweet guy. And he expressed a few times a real interest in collaborating with Jungkook or Jimin, who both used to mention him a lot. He did collaborated with BTS before but still, it seems like a missed opportunity to me. But maybe they’re just simply not interested anymore

Yeah, tbh the industry doesn't much care for morals and neither does the majority of audiences, but Army isn't the GP. We take pride in BTS's values and expect them to be the exception to the rule. We take who they collab with seriously. When they collab with problematic people there's usually some push back from the fandom, even if most Armys roll with it. With 3D, I did see a lot of people complain about Jack Harlow, but most stayed quiet. Yet the lack of noise 3D made in the fandom compared to Seven speaks volumes.

I don't know Troye Sivan well but he makes indie-leaning music, right? That's not a style Jungkook has done a lot, so it would be more interesting for him than the kind of music Kid Laroi makes.

Thanks for the ask!

#ask #bts #jungkook #text #thanks for the ask!

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our-flag-means-death-ao3feed · 1 year

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Act of Grace

by ShesAKillerQueen98

The British have taken over the ship and now their fate lies with Chauncey Badminton, and all Isabella can do is watch helplessly as the life she thought she had is turned upside down

Takes place during episode 9

Words: 1897, Chapters: 1/3, Language: English

Series: Part 11 of The Songbird Chronicles

Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: M/M

Characters: Stede Bonnet, Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Isabella Noa (OC), Chauncey Badminton, Crew of the Revenge (Our Flag Means Death), Israel Hands

Relationships: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet, Blackbeard | Edward Teach & Stede Bonnet & Original Character(s)

Additional Tags: Stede Bonnet Needs a Hug, Stede Bonnet is a Little Shit, Stede Bonnet Being an Idiot, Competent Stede Bonnet, Soft Stede Bonnet, Stede Bonnet is Bad at Feelings, Stede Bonnet Loves Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Loves Stede Bonnet, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Needs a Hug, Blackbeard | Edward Teach is Not Okay, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Deserves Nice Things, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Has Abandonment Issues, Blackbeard | Edward Teach is Bad at Feelings, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Has Feelings, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Has Anger Issues, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Has Self-Esteem Issues, Stede Bonnet Has Self-Esteem Issues, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Singing, Family Fluff, Family Loss, Family Dynamics, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Constipation, Emotional Baggage, Repressed Memories, Emotionally Repressed, Original Character(s), Original Female Character(s) - Freeform, Major Original Character(s), Crew of the Revenge as Family (Our Flag Means Death), Stede Bonnet Loves the Crew of the Revenge, Stede Bonnet is a Good Dad, Found Family, Goodbyes, Sad Ending, Episode: s01e09 Act of Grace, Canon-Typical Historical Inaccuracy (Our Flag Means Death), Parent-Child Relationship, Adopted Sibling Relationship, Sibling Love

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/46535968

#Our flag means death #ofmd #https://archiveofourown.org/works/46535968

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ao3feed-rarry · 2 years

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Heart To Heart ~ Draco Malfoy

read it on the AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/41388267

by allthesepages1

When faced with the trials of Hogwarts, coping with her mother's death and the stress of her best friend and brother competing in the deadly tri-wizards tournament, Arabella Diggory is doing her best to stay afloat. As chaos unfolds, Arabella finds comfort in unexpected ways, or, unexpected people. Sometimes, when you're consumed by darkness, all you need is a little light, well in this case light comes in the form of a boy.

But in the end is he enough to protect her from the inevitable? ___________________________________

This story follows the plot of the fourth book in the Harry Potter series, the Goblet Of Fire (there are some changes and differences though so it's not just a repeat of the books). However, I have aged up the characters a bit. So Arabella and the golden trio are starting their 6th year when the tournaments begin, rather than their fourth (they are 16/17).

A Draco Malfoy love story.

⚠️ All Harry Potter characters belong to JK Rowling

Trigger Warnings: mature language, mentions of illness and anxiety/panic attacks, violence.

Words: 12676, Chapters: 14/14, Language: English

Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Major Character Death

Categories: Multi

Characters: Original Female Character(s), Cedric Diggory, Draco Malfoy, cadric diggory’s mother, Harry Potter, Voldemort (Harry Potter), Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, Fred Weasley, George Weasley, Ginny Weasley, Blaise Zabini, Neville Longbottom, Luna Lovegood, Arabella Diggory, Minerva McGonagall, Albus Dumbledore, Severus Snape, Viktor Krum, Fleur Delacour

Relationships: Draco Malfoy & Original Female Character(s), Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley, Neville Longbottom/Luna Lovegood, Pansy Parkinson/Fred Weasley, Hermione Granger & Original Female Character(s), Harry Potter/Ron Weasley

Additional Tags: Enemies to Lovers, Slow Burn, Forbidden Love, Cedric Diggory’s sister, Draco Malfoy Needs a Hug, Protective Cedric Diggory, Draco is a little shit, multiple deaths ; you will sob, voldemort stirs shit up like a baddie, Harry Potter needs a chill pill, good Hermione friendship, Harry Potter and Ron Weasley friendship, Fred Weasley ; alive or dead??…, buckets of tension, magical libraries and Diagon Alley, Protective Draco Malfoy, Book 4: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, main character death (s), plot twists !!, Mental Health Issues, main character death… sorry, Draco Malfoy has a tiny bit too much to drink.. understatement, Violence, thats why it’s rated mature, Rip to the many brain cells Draco lost from being forced to befriend Harry, well more of dislike to lovers but lots of tension, slytherin party ofc

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/LET5jJx

#ao3feed #ao3feed rarry #fanfic #harry x ron #rarry #hon #rory

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ao3feed-scarletvision · 2 years

Text

My Little, Red Ballerina

by LadybugDreamer

Bucky taught Natasha in the 40s. At a time when Hydra and the Redroom were working together. They loved each other. They were the only two people who truly understood one another. Sure, other people could try. But nobody would ever compete with the love the two shared. It wasn't just a romance. It was an unbreakable bond they shared. James and Natalia. Or Bucky and Natasha. They've changed.

Natasha became and Avenger. She turned her life around after escaping the Redroom. Bucky wasn't saved. And he was the Winter Soldier. Steve tries to save him. He was his best friend, after all. But ultimately, Natasha is the one who is able to temporarily snap Bucky out of his trance. Bucky knows he's not going to be able to stay out of this mind control. So he shares a sweet night with Natasha before leaving again.

When Bucky finally returns so he can fight Thanos, after being helped in Wakanda, Natasha is different. She's colder. She's also pregnant and trying to hide it. Steve welcomes his old friend back. Natasha is to hurt to try. But she does before going into battle. Because she loves James and she needs him to know. And James loves Natasha. And he needs her to know.

Words: 3321, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), Captain America (Comics), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Black Widow (Comics), Black Widow (Movie 2021)

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death

Categories: F/M

Characters: James "Bucky" Barnes, Natasha Romanov (Marvel), Steve Rogers, Clint Barton, Wanda Maximoff, Vision (Marvel), Tony Stark, Other Marvel Characters, Other Avengers, Liho (Marvel), Alpine (Marvel), Original Child Character(s)

Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Natasha Romanov, James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes & Clint Barton, Wanda Maximoff & Natasha Romanov, Wanda Maximoff/Vision

Additional Tags: I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Winter/Widow - Freeform, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, Mix Between Comics and Movies, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Bucky Barnes Remembers, Natasha Romanov Feels, BAMF Natasha Romanov, Hurt Bucky Barnes, Hurt Natasha Romanov, Unplanned Pregnancy, Pregnant Natasha Romanov, Past Bucky Barnes/Natasha Romanov, Natasha Knew Bucky in the 40s, Bucky and Steve never met, Bucky Barnes's Metal Arm, Artist Bucky Barnes, Dancer Natasha Romanov, Bucky Taught Natasha in the Red Room, Red Room (Marvel), How Do I Tag, I'm Bad At Tagging, Bucky Comes Back Because of Natasha, Established Bucky Barnes/Natasha Romanov, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Not Canon Compliant, Other Additional Tags to Be Added

from AO3 works tagged 'Wanda Maximoff/Vision' https://ift.tt/RIKtorU via IFTTT

#scarlet vision #scarletvision #the vision #wanda maximoff #scarlet witch #IFTTT

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nevermindirah · 3 years

Note

Do you have any thoughts on the use of AAVE for Nile (or lack thereof) in TOG fanfiction? I've been reading some Book of Nile fic and some writers seem to write her as a Millennial™ (using words like "fave" and "woke") but never acknowledge her Blackness in her patterns of speech. I know we don't see her use as much AAVE in the films, but I would argue she's in situations where code-switching would be valued (first in a "professional" environment in the army, then around a group of non-Black strangers).

Hi anon! I have many thoughts on this and I'm honored you asked me! But I should start by saying I'm white and any thoughts Black fans and especially Black American fans have on this that they want to share would be beyond lovely. (I'm not gonna tag anybody bc that feels rude but please add onto this post if any of y'all see this and want to!)

The main reason I personally avoid AAVE for Nile in my own fics is because I'm not Black. But Nile-centric fics by Black writers tend to avoid using much of it too, at least from what I've noticed/understood, and my guess is it's largely for the reason you mention, that she's in situations that encourage code-switching.

In movie canon Nile is highly competent at tailoring her language to each situation she finds herself in. This fantastic linguistics analysis meta shows how skillfully Nile chooses her vocabulary and grammar to meet her goals with different conversation partners in different contexts. In comics canon Nile had a bunch of different civilian jobs before joining the Marines, so she would've had experience code-switching in the ways that made sense for all those different contexts as well as the Marines and her family and high school and wherever else she spent her time before we met her. And now she's spending her time with a handful of immortals none of whom are native English speakers and a fellow Black American but one with a Queen's English UK accent whose professional experience is in the CIA where high-status code-switching is often an absolute must for success or even survival.

Fics featuring Nile are charged with extrapolating from that to how it might show up in her use of language that she's coping with a traumatic separation from her family and her career and pretty much everything she's ever known and now she needs to be able to make herself understood to people who seem to care about her and each other but are super duper in crisis, three (soon to be four) of whom predate Modern English entirely and the only one who's anywhere near her contemporary she's not supposed to talk to for a century. All of these people are telling her that pretty much any contact with any mortals poses an existential threat to her and the rest of the group. How the FUCK is she supposed to cope with that, like, generally? And would it be a more effective way for her to cope if she talked to Andy Joe and Nicky using the speech patterns that she used to use with her mom and brother, to at least retain that part of her identity even if it means having to do a lot of explaining, or would it meet her needs better to prioritize Andy Joe and Nicky understanding what she means with her words over using the particular words and grammar forms she used with her family?

I've seen several fics, both Nile-centric / BoN and otherwise, explore this a little bit in how/whether Nile uses Millennial™ speak. It's often a theme in Nile texting Booker despite the exile because of the popular headcanon that he as The Tech Guy is the only other immortal who understands memes. But Nile's much-younger-than-Booker mom probably uses Boomer and/or Gen X memes and Andy has been adapting to new communication styles for forever as evidenced by her canon high level of fluency with standard-American-accented English.

Which brings us back to people avoiding AAVE because they're not Black and they don't want to make mistakes (or they're not Black and they don't want to get yelled at for making mistakes, though I think many people overestimate how much they'll get yelled at while underestimating how much these mistakes can hurt). I can imagine some Black fans hold back from using much AAVE in fic because they don't want to share in-group stuff with white people who are likely to then adopt and ruin it, as white people so often do with Black cultural stuff. Some links about this including a great Khadija Mbowe video. I'm saying this gently, anon, because you might not know: woke, an example you cited as Millennial™ speak, is AAVE, and that's gotten erased by so many white people appropriating it and using it incorrectly online.

And also there's the part where fandom is a hobby and you never know when you're reading a fic that's the very first thing someone's ever written outside of a school assignment. This cultural considerations of language shit takes a level of effort and skill that not everybody puts into every fic, or even could if they wanted to because they haven't had time to build their skills yet. It's definitely easier for non-Black fans to project our millennial feels onto Nile than to do the layers of research and self-reflection it requires to depict what Blackness might mean to Nile, and it's not surprising that often people sharing their hobby creations on the internet have gone the easier route. There's not even necessarily shame in doing what's easier. It's just frustrating and often hurtful when structural white supremacy means that 3-dimensional Black characters are rare in media and thoughtful explorations of them in fandom are seen by the majority of fans as not-easy to make and therefore Nile Freeman, the main character in The Old Guard (2020) dir. Gina Prince-Bythewood, has the least fic and meta and art made about her of our 5 main immortals.

I've been active in different fandoms off and on for twenty years and I barely managed to write 5,000 words about Sam Wilson across multiple different fics in the 7 years since I fell in love with him. There's an alchemy to which characters we connect with, and on top of that which characters we connect with in a way that causes us to create stuff about them. Something about Nile Freeman finally tipped me over the edge from a voracious reader to a voracious writer. It's not for me to judge which characters speak to other individuals to the level of creating content about them, but I do think it's important for us to notice, and then work to fight, the pattern where across this fandom as a whole Nile gets way less content, and way less depth in so much of the content that's in theory about her, than any of these other characters.

Anyway, back to language. My two long fics feature Nile with several Black friends — Copley and OCs and cameos from other media — but all of those characters except Alec Hardison from Leverage aren't American. It's very possible I'm guilty of stereotyping Black British speech patterns in I See Your Eyes Seek a Distant Shore. I watched hours and hours of Black haircare YouTube videos in the research for that fic and I modeled my OCs' speech patterns on what I heard from some of those YouTubers as well as what I've heard people like John Boyega and Idris Elba saying in interviews, but the thing about doing your best is you still might fuck up.

I'm slowly making progress on my WIP where Nile and Sam Wilson are cousins, and what ways of talking with a family member might be authentic for Nile is a major question I need to figure out. For that, I'm largely modeling my writing choices on how I hear my Black friends and colleagues talking to each other. I haven't overheard colleagues talking in an office in a long-ass time, but back when that was a thing, I remember seeing a ton of nuance in the different ways many of my Black colleagues would talk to each other. Different people have different personalities! And backgrounds! And priorities! A few jobs ago my department was about 1/3 Black and we worked closely with Obama administration staff many of whom were Black and there was SO MUCH VARIETY in how Black people talked to each other, about work and workplace-appropriate personal stuff, where I and other white coworkers could hear. There are a few work friends in particular who I have in my head when I'm trying to imagine how Sam and Nile might talk to each other. From the outside looking in, God DAMN is shit complicated, intellectually and interpersonally and spiritually, for Black people who are devoting their professional lives to public service in the United States.

One more aspect of this that I have big thoughts on but I need to take extra care in talking about is the idea of acknowledging Nile's Blackness in her patterns of speech. There's no one right way to be Black, and Nile's a fictional character created by a white dude but there are plenty of real-life Black Americans who don't use much or even any AAVE, for reasons that are complicated because of white supremacy. (Highly highly recommend this video by Shanspeare on the harms of the Oreo stereotype.)

Something that's not the same but has enough similarity that I think it's worth talking about is my personal experience with authenticity and American Jewish speech patterns. My Jewish family members don't talk like they're in The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, and I've known lots of people who do talk that way (or the millennial version of it), some of whom have questioned my Jewishness because I don't talk that way. That hurts me. Sometimes when another Jew tells me some shit like "I've never heard a Jew say y'all'd've," I can respond with "well now you have asshole, bless your Yankee-ass heart," because the myth of Dixie is a racist lie but I will totally call white Northerners Yankees when they're being shitty to me for being Southern, and this particular Jew fucking revels in using "bless your heart" with maximum polite aggression, especially with said Yankees. But sometimes I don't have it in me to say anything and it just quietly hurts having an important part of me disbelieved by someone who shares that important part of me. The sting isn't quite the same when non-Jews disbelieve or discount my Jewishness, but that hurts too.

Who counts as authentically Jewish is a messy in-group conversation and it doesn't really make sense to explain it all here. Who counts as authentically Jewish is a matter of legal status for immigration, citizenship, and civil rights in Israel, and it's my number 2 reason after horrific treatment of Palestinians that I'm antizionist. But outside that extremely high-stakes legal situation, it can just feel really shitty to not be recognized as One Of Us, especially by your own people.

It can also feel really shitty to be The Only One of Your Kind in a group, even if that group is an immortal chosen family who all loves each other dearly. Sometimes especially in a situation like that where you know those people love you but there are certain things they don't get about you and will never quite be able to. I'm definitely projecting at least a little bit of my "lonely Jew who will be alone again for yet another Jewish holiday" stuff onto Nile when at the end of I See Your Eyes Seek a Distant Shore she's thinking about being the only Black immortal and moving away from the community she'd built with a mostly-Black group of mortals in that fic. Maybe that tracks, or maybe that's fucked up of me.

Basically, this got very long but it's complicated, writing about experiences that aren't your own takes skill which in turn takes time and practice to build, writing about experiences not your own that our society maligns can cause a lot of harm if done badly, it can also cause a lot of harm when a large enough portion of a fandom just decides to nope out of something that's difficult and risky because then there's just not much content about a character who deserves just a shit ton of loving and nuanced content, people are individuals and two people who come from the exact same cultural context might show that influence in all kinds of different ways, identity is complicated, language is complicated, writing is hard, and empathy and humility and doing our best aren't a guarantee of avoiding harm but they do go a long way in helping people create thoughtful content about a character as awesome and powerful and kind and messy and scared and curious and WORTHY as Nile Freeman.

#nile freeman #linguistics #TOG POC Love Fest #nileweek2021 #tog meta #tog #long post #mine #antiblackness #jewish things #hi i'm an antizionist jew no i don't really want to talk about it

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potteresque-ire · 3 years

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Hello. I just turned to be a turtle recently after being a solo fan mostly because of toxic atmosphere of solo fans. May I ask, were relationships between XZ and YB solos always so intense and also bad attitude to BJYX even during the promotion “the untamed”? Or did this conflict start after the events of 2020? Thank you in advance.

Hello, and Happy 2021! I’m a super new fan of the fandom, and so these aren’t questions I’m qualified to answer at all. I’m more comfortable providing some wider sociopolitical contexts to fandom-related events because I’ve been reading about Chinese news for a loooong time. My “investigative interest” (oh dear, that sounds so pretentious) is also more on understanding the CP culture in general, how it ties with the country’s state of affairs rather than focusing specifically on Gg and Dd. While I’ve read back on some history re: gg and dd’s fandoms, Tumblr is the only site where I’ve interacted directly with fellow fans.

But I’ve written up what I’ve understand about solo and CP fans for c-dramas so far, mostly for my own benefit (I have a ridiculously poor memory!). Maybe it can offer some insight? This is very new information to me as well; so, if anyone spots something wrong or wants to supplement, please jump right in!

Wars between the fans of the leads of a CP (“ship” in English; stands for “couple”) aren’t new. Conflicts between solo and CP fans also aren’t new.

Competition is the most obvious cause of wars between the fans of the leads of a CP. Especially in the case of M/M pairings, the person “bound” to each idol by their CP is also, by default, about the most “direct” competitor one can have. They’re likely to be of the same age group, share similar fan demographics. Popularity of young male idols (often called “Little Fresh Meat” 小鮮肉, a nickname I’ve abhorred for the decade or so it’s come to existence) also isn’t expected to last, so the two CP leads must make the most of their newfound fame within the same time frame. The competition is more than fighting for similar roles; in China, another major arena is endorsements, in which an idol’s popularity is by measured by 1) the number they hold and 2) the units they sell. Here in the US, stars choose their endorsements based on how well they fit their image; there, stars take as many as they can as long as the negotiated terms are satisfactory. Hence, dd is the spokesperson of 25 products / services in 2020 (including an insurance company (!!)).

I’ve also read about this norm in the industry, which I have yet to verify: in China, if two stars compete for the endorsement of the same brand product, the one who loses will not get endorsements of same products from different brands — at least, not in the short term — because any brand who uses the star who lost would be seen as inferior. Hence, to lose the competition on one endorsement deal can mean losing the endorsement deals for an entire category of products.

(Someone on Weibo has pointed this out: while Gg and Dd have often endorsed competing brands of the same product: Budweiser (gg) and Yenching beer (dd), for example; they have never fought for the endorsement of same brand product. Again, I haven’t verified this.)

This part is easy to understand.

The next question is: why are solo fans against CP fans? “Girlfriend fans” — solo fans who can’t bear to seeing their idol paired up with anyone other than themselves — only make up a fraction of the fandom. How are CP fans generally perceived?

My key findings so far: CP fans are *perceived* to be more likely to express negative views about their idol paired up with other actors / actresses, which will affect viewership and ratings, restrict the kind of roles their idol will be invited to play. More importantly, CP fans are *perceived* as fickle — more likely to walk away after their favourite CP drama has ended, because as CP lovers, they’re thought to be equally in love with the romantic gestures as with the stars who perform them on/off stage. ie, When another drama comes along featuring the same romantic gestures, the CP fans are expected to jump ship.

I highlight the word “perceive”, because while it doesn’t matter how solo fans see CP fans, it does matter how the business side of c-ent view CP fans and it appears to share this view. The c-YiZhan fandoms have been unhappy with the publicity of the upcoming adapted BL dramas for this reason — aside from their allegations that it’s copying The Untamed’s BTS, the thing that has offended them the most, perhaps, is the very idea that the marketing departments thought a few “leaked” photos of the leads acting intimately close are enough to woo them away from YiZhan, from Gg and Dd.

Given this, perhaps, prevalent view of CP fans, CP fandoms have been viewed as something disposable, almost, to be made, used and discarded quickly.

Before and during the airing of the drama, the marketing / publicity teams fuel and encourage CP fandoms, reap the benefits in viewership from the ensuing discussions and hot searches. Solo fans usually aren’t threatened by CP fandoms in this nascent phase—CP fandoms have been far smaller in size and only grow during the broadcast.

More importantly, the norms have been that CP fandoms do not last.

CP fandoms do have a tendency to “self-combust” over time: fans * within * the fandom accusing each other of being partial to one of the leads — spending more money on A’s endorsements, for example, or buying more copies of B’s music. However, this isn’t how many CP fandoms die. Instead, once the show is over, the process of “Breaking the CP” begins. I’m not sure who gets this process going, but my guess is the leads’ management companies, with consent (willing or unwilling) from the actors. Breaking the CP means having the CP leads avoid each other as soon as the drama is done airing, and for as long as it takes for the CP fandoms to dissipate. It means no more appearing in the same drama and shows; no more sharing a stage; and if they happen to be at the same event, they are to communicate as little as possible. This “loosening the bind” between the leads is designed to free the actors up for the next CPs, and its way of execution can be very abrupt, very … cruel for the CP fans. For one of 2020 summer dramas (Love and Redemption 琉璃), for example, a popular character (het) CP pairing was broken up in the last fan meet, 10 days after the final episode had aired. The fan meet was marketed as a CP event (there was even merch for the CP); CPs fans bought the tickets, perfectly aware of the unsaid “CPs are made to be broken” rule and it’d likely be the last time they’d see their CP together. But the organisers denied them even this last chance; the leads of the CP had no interactions, not even eye contact during the entire event. The actor didn’t acknowledge the actress in his farewell speech. The fans understandably got upset; even outsiders sympathised, stating that the CP-breaking could be handled with a little more consideration. Word on the street was that because the male lead already had other dramas lined up, the CP had to be broken up as quickly as possible.

(Weibo Night from almost a year ago was seen as a “Break the CP” event for Gg and Dd. Some turtles still cry at the memory of it.)

There’s a term related to the breaking of CPs: 提純 (“increasing the purity”). It describes the ultimate goal of breaking CPs: increasing the proportion of solo (”pure”) fans by breaking up the CP and having the solo fandoms of each lead absorb the CP fans. Because solo fans are *perceived* to be more loyal (won’t jump ship the next romantic drama comes along), less likely to draw criticisms (especially if the CP is M/M and/or affect the RL lives of their stars), and have more purchasing power (as CP fans have to divide their resources between the two leads and equally).

How does this affect how solo fans see CP fans? Another way to say the above is: one CP fan is one fan the two solo fandoms fail to capture. One more CP fan is one less solo fan. “CP fan” should be a temporary identity. CP fandoms sequester resources from the solo fandoms until they’re broken up.

This sets the stage for conflicts if the CP fandoms refuse to fade, if the CP fans refuse to turn solo.

The conflict between solo and CP fandoms is, of course, even more heated for real-person CP’s, which can, indeed, pose a significant threat to the leads’ life and career. An easy example of the former is if one of the CP leads are in a RL relationship, and/or if the lead is straight but the CP is queer (this is the case for The Guardian (2018), the first popular adapted BL “dangai” drama). Another major issue with real-person CPs (queer or not) is that the media will make frequent comparisons of the leads’ follow-up career. If the CP “bind” remains, the lead perceived as less popular may be viewed as using the more popular one to sustain their popularity. Fans of the more popular lead do not take that well. The management company of the less popular lead takes that even less well, and its PR team will work even harder to eliminate the CP from public discussion.

Overall, the “breaking the CP” strategy works as intended. As long as the CP leads stop interacting, no more new candies are generated for the CP fandoms, and even the best candies have an expiration date. The CP fans move on, often to other CP pairings—the CP breaking process often leave them hurt and disappointed at the leads—and further propagating the perception that they are fickle souls who prefer candies over actors.

With this background, it doesn’t surprise me that the relationship between the fans of Gg, Dd, and Yizhan has been so intense since the airing of the Untamed… it would actually surprise me (much) more if it isn’t.

First and foremost, if I take away my YiZhan-tinted lens (as much as I can anyway!), the competition between Gg and Dd automatically becomes The Battlefield in c-ent. Gg and Dd are among the most popular idols right now, and there’s a strong urgency in this competition as idol popularity is perceived to have a limited shelf life. Now, 18 months after The Untamed, Gg and Dd are not only vying for survival in the same industry—which may encourage cooperation between the two solo fandoms—they’re vying for the throne.

Things are already extra tense that way. Here’s an analogy I can think of—it’s easier to accept losing a lottery by getting every number wrong than getting a single number wrong, and by one count. It’s harder for solo fans to accept being number 2, when number 1 was a co-star, the other half of their idol’s CP.

Now, into this unresolved tension, throw in a huge curveball known as the YiZhan fandoms. A curveball that isn’t even supposed to exist — CP fandoms are all supposed to fizzle out quickly after the show is over. Instead, the BJYX supertopic on Weibo (by far the biggest of the three Yizhan CPs) had 1.5 million members in January 2020. It now has 2.8 million (January 2021).

(For reference, dd’s supertopic has 5.4 million members and gg’s, 7.7 million.)

These YiZhan fandoms aren’t merely living on their last breath, their stale candies. They’re thriving. Self-combustion hasn’t happened. CP fans of Gg and Dd keep finding fresh candies, keep having new things to rejoice and scream about.

If I put myself in the shoes of a solo fan, what does this continued growth of the YiZhan fandoms mean? It means the “binding” between My Idol and That-Other-Idol-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named, each a contender of the c-ent throne, is strengthening instead of loosening. It means more and more fans of My Idol are exhibiting signs of wavering loyalty, by becoming fans of both My Idol and That-Other-Idol. Fan culture in China is highly organized, requiring strategy, cooperation and obedience when it comes to generating the best numbers for their idol (sells, ratings, viewership etc). Having to rely on the fickle CP fans to generate these numbers means uncertainty and anxiety.

People behave differently when they’re nervous. Some chew on their fingernails. Some attack.

2020, of course, make the solo fandoms even more nervous about each other. Gg, post-227, isn’t a safe person to be “bound to”, and also to have one’s career compared against—given the bad publicity that has circulated around him, given the fact that he has managed to stay on top in spite of it. Dd, meanwhile, has grown in popularity while Gg goes into hiding—while I personally do not, for a moment, believe Dd has anything to do with 227, it is within human nature to ask: if one loses—and in a manner so publicised, so catastrophic that even the Western media reported on it—who has the most to gain? Work culture in almost every industry in China is extremely cut-throat, and securing victory by not-so-clean methods isn’t uncommon with the immense pressure to perform. Fans are bringing in their experiences from RL in how they view their idol’s competition—with suspicion, with defensiveness. With swords sharpened and ready for counterattacks.

The ultimate cherry-on-top when it comes to causing conflicts between Gg’s, Dd’s and YiZhan fandoms is, of course, the fact that YiZhan is no garden-variety, heterosexual, character CP. It’s a M/M real person CP, in a society where homosexuality, while legal, is still considered “non-mainstream values” and explicitly censored from TV; where personal freedoms have overall been tightening and laws can change overnight. It’s one thing if their idol is truly in a queer relationship and chooses to announce it themselves; it’s a whole different story if it’s some fans of another idol who “out” them—who publicise their queerness that, in the eyes of these solo fans, may very well be fictional. 227 has already confirmed that in c-ent, idols pay the price of their fan’s wrongdoings and in this case, all it takes is for the YiZhan fandoms to make a single mistake—to celebrate one candy too loudly, for example (“to dance outside the circle”), and catch the attention of the wrong government official — to not only cost their idols their popularity, but their whole career. To the solo fans, therefore, the mere existence of the YiZhan fandoms pose a huge risk to their idol that should’ve been avoidable in the first place. And when they check out the new candies, what do they see? They see Gg leaving hints suggestive of Dd; they see Dd doing inexplicable things that can be linked to Gg. c-Turtles joke sometimes that solo fans are even better than they are at spotting the connections between Gg and Dd. But while turtles see these connections as evidences of a romantic relationship, what solo fans see is the other idol latching onto their own, whose fame makes it a reasonable act; they see it as the other solo fandom carelessly jeopardizing their own idol’s career for the sake of more noise and popularity.

The solo fandoms end up fighting. They have few reasons NOT to do so without the YiZhan-tinted lens.

That said though, I’m not sure if the wars between Gg’s, Dd’s and YiZhan fandoms are truly getting worse. As I write this, my thought is: perhaps it’s not that the fans are disliking each other more, but rather, more and more people are getting involved, and the stakes, the risks are becoming higher and higher. Gg and Dd both had fans during the filming of The Untamed, but they were a small fraction, quantity wise, to what it is now. Even if, at the time, 100% of Gg and Dd fans hated each other, they still wouldn’t have generated the noise than, say, if 0.01% of Gg’s fans are arguing with 0.01% of Dd’s fans now. The arguments then, however ugly they could be, would’ve stayed off hot searches, and largely within the two fandoms. These days, however, when even Gg shaking a pen can make it into hot search (as he did during the Tencent Awards), every heated exchange is amplified by passer-bys, by antis, by done-for-money re-bloggers. Quarrels snowball exponentially to the number of mouths pitching in; so does the antagonistic sentiments behind the hurtful words purposefully or accidentally spilled. Meanwhile, the c-YiZhan fandoms have reached the size that as much as they’ve tried to keep everything away from the public eye, it’s not really possible anymore. Search BJYX online, and videos after videos pop up for any outsider who wish to get a primer—and there’s no control over that content. Gg and Dd’s commercials hint at it. The Tencent Awards show host cued it. Before, the YiZhan fandoms may still be able to get away with a mistake or two. Now, they can make half a mistake and all the info already floating around will make sure that half a mistake will round to one.

If I were a solo fan, perhaps I’d scream my lung out too. Think of how terrible this all is, if Dd(Gg) is actually Gg(Dd)’s most fierce competition, as his being the other half of the CP is meant to be. Think of all the damages these fantastical speculations can do, if My Idol isn’t queer and tomorrow, the government comes down with a decree that outlaws queerness. Maybe My Idol will be spared if he isn’t at the top. But My Idol is at the top. Everyone will point to him. The hot searches will show his name, make sure the powers-that-be see it. He … his downfall… can be made an example …

Okay, okay, I’ll stop playacting here. Phew. That was scary * pats turtle shell to confirm its presence * :) . But can you see how deep that fear can go, for a fan who really, really loves and is therefore protective of their idol? How this fear, which stems from love, can turn into hate and generally loud, angry yelling across the internet?

#Anonymous #pie answers #pie metas #yizhan #bjyx

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maliciouslycreative · 3 years

Text

How I played damage control to an anti in a small anime fandom and may have led to her ultimate downfall

I know I had a really nice write up of this at one point but oh well. I’ll spill more of the tea in this one because honestly the tea was so hot.

There are a few things that I have to give context to first. Gaia online was like THE mega forum of the 2000s, you made a little avatar and through posting and doing other activities on the forum you made money to buy clothes for your avatar. There were forums for everything but the fannish portions were really what drew in most of the people. The anime I was into was Beyblade. It was a shonen anime about fighting with tops that were possessed by the spirits of magical creatures. The story was honestly pretty average but the characters were fantastic and the fandom is to this day still one of my favourites. The series had a primarily male cast and didn’t even have a female lead until the second season. This led to the fanfic for the English fandom being about 70% canon/OC, 10 % canon m/f, and 20% slash. The most popular character in the English fandom was by far Kai Hiwatari, the loner badboy of the team.

Also before we get started I would like to add that one of my best friends was neck deep in this and the two of us were more or less fandom married. This is the same friend that I fake dated, had feelings for, and she nearly got me into kpop in 2011 so like if you haven’t read that story please read it too because it will give you a good idea of how stupid I am and how much of a fanfic I have truly lived.

To set the stage I was 16, soon to be 17 when I joined the fandom and it was 2004. In September of that year I wrote a humour longfic that became an absolute smash hit and I found myself somehow fandom famous. It was around this time that I joined Gaia online. I made my little avatar and immediately went looking for the beyblade thread so that I could make new friends. I found the main thread, made my little introduction and at the end of it mentioned that I was a slash writer but I supported all ships. This is where I met C. She had declared herself the authority on Beyblade in these parts and I had just committed the crime of mentioning slash which was very obviously not canon and we did not discuss in this thread because we only discussed canon things. I was like well that’s a bit severe but like sure whatever I just want to hang out and have fun.

Oh boy did I have no idea what I was in for.

C was a year older than me and unfortunately that made her older than the majority of the fans at the time. Her favourite character was Kai, and she was not shy about talking about this fact. She stanned Kai above all other characters, and often at their expense. She was also a fanfic writer of a popular canon/OC series. Actually, she was so full of herself that she didn’t even call herself a fanfic writer, no her stories were in fact novels and were apparently very good. I never read them. But more on that later.

Eventually the slash fans got tired of her being rude to us in the general thread so we made a Beyblade slash thread. There was a core of like 8 or so of us and we honestly had sooo much fun. When C would be too unbearable in the main thread the people from there used to come over to our thread and we’d chat with them about non slash stuff because we were honestly all multishippers and just wanted to have fun. We’d get comments like “wow, I’ve had more pleasant canon het ship discussions in the slash thread than the regular thread”. We never worried about C coming over and getting upset about comments like this because she refused to be associated with anything related with slash lmao.

I tried my best to keep the peace between C, myself, and the rest of the fandom because ultimately I hate being in fandom drama. I just want everyone to have a good time. I’m a people pleaser. Unfortunately my newfound fame put me in the awkward position of being the most fandom popular person in our small community aside from C. Virtually every fan that read fanfics that came into our thread knew one of us or the other by reputation and C HATED this. Especially because people would come in to the thread, recognise me and go “oh my goodness I love your fanfics!” and I’d be super sweet with them and it’d lead into “I can’t believe how nice you are, I love you” which would lead to us crying at each other. This was not the kind of fan interaction that C got, no her fans were more kind that were there to praise her and worship her like a deity that had blessed them with some gift. Rarely did they tell her how kind she was.

Back in the mid 2000s there were really commonly those commercials (usually by Christian organisations) asking people to sponsor say children in Africa or to help build schools or provide drinking water. You all probably know the ones; know the language that they used in those commercials. My fandom wife, who I suppose I shall call wifey because yes we were THAT couple back then, once said that C described her fics like those people described donating money to save the lives of Children in Africa. So we used to joke that her fics were so good they’d save lives in Africa. Looking back at it all, she almost had a very fundamentalist Christian approach to bringing people into her fanfics. She of course tried to get all the slash people into reading it. None of us read canon/oc fic mostly due to our poor treatment at the hands of their fans and creators. Getting fed up I one day told her that if she would read any one of my fanfics that I would read the entirety of her novels. Yes, I was willing to commit to read a couple 100k of canon/oc fanfic that I’d never touch normally if she would even read one of my 1k 1 shots. Heck, I had a fic even that shipped 2 minor characters so she didn’t even have to sully herself reading about one of the main characters. It was honestly a good deal in her favour. I kept this up until the day we all left the fandom. Sometimes I do wonder if her fics were even ¼ as good as she claimed, but I will never know because she refused to read my fics.

She wasn’t all bad and a tyrant all the time. As long as people kept the conversations on track and didn’t come in to the thread saying things like “KAI IS SO HOT ND T3H BEST N I AM GUN 2 MARRY HIM” she stayed mostly civil. It was always hilarious watching InuYahsa or Naruto fans try to come in and bad mouth Beyblade because they’d unleash the dragon and C was great at chasing off undesirables in the thread.

The real apex of goings on though on Gaia was the guild drama. So guilds were like exclusive themed mini forums within Gaia. Anyone could buy one and run it however they want, as long as it still adhered to Gaia’s ToS. C of course was the owner of the only Beyblade guild. The fandom wasn’t really big enough to support 2 guilds so we just kind of let it go. Technically she allowed people to post slash fanfics but like everything had to be explicitly tagged and there was absolutely no slash RP. Wifey and I controlled a handful of minor characters together in the forum RP and definitely used to try to push the boundaries a little bit. Some ambiguous flirting here, a stray comment there. It was such a fragile balance though because C was heavy on the ban button. The active portion of the guild was just people that were in the cult of C and worshipped her writing.

Understandably the other slash fans and myself were getting disheartened by this. So we pooled our funds together and decided that we’d open a second guild that though it was run by slash fans we would welcome anyone into our ranks. We just wanted to have a fun place for everyone to hang out, and to hopefully run a few events out of. In hindsight, we should have seen what would happen. When we opened the guild, with me as the guild leader, it was like somebody blew up the whole dam protecting the delicate ecosystem we had cultivated. Every single person in the Gaia fandom that was not a zealous follower of C applied to be in our guild and left her guild. We of course figured that we’d attract some of the gen population but we did not expect to accidentally poach all of it. All of the moderators were getting messages from people thanking us for giving them a place where they could say whatever they wanted without fear of getting their faces ripped off or banned.

C lost her shit. She was so mad that we went behind her back to ruin her guild. We literally had to show her posts in the very public slash thread that we had been planning this in public and that it was not to ruin her life. We just wanted a place where we could freely post slash. The two of us had some spicy comments back and forth and then she dropped an absolute bombshell on me. Since Gaia’s mail system is terrible I unfortunately no longer have exactly what she said but it was something along the lines of “Ok, you win. I’m going to close my guild.”. Us slash fans had never been doing this to win anything. We had never been competing. We just wanted a safe space to be ourselves.

C never joined our guild. The fandom slowly faded out within the next year anyway. We weren’t getting new content so naturally people just drifted into other fandoms. C kept up with the main Beyblade thread for a lot longer than most of us but eventually that eventually faded into obscurity too.

I learned a lot about fandom bullies from those days. But honestly the thing that stuck with me the most out of everything was that if you provide a positive safe space for people they will flock to it. It may seem like there are so many hostile people out there, but there really aren't. They're the minority but they just make sure that their voice is the loudest. The best way is to ignore them and just do your own thing. The bullies just want attention and if you don’t give it to them and prove to them that their opinion doesn’t matter to you then they’ll move in and find something else to yell at.

#malicious musings #stacey's adventures in fandom drama #lol #honestly it was such a fucking wild time #if i think of any other specific instances of drama i'll add them #god i wish i had screenshots of some of what went on #but sadly going through archived gaia posts is easier said than done

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kingofthewilderwest · 3 years

Note

I know you aren’t keen on getting a bunch of asks recommending media, but is there anything you’ve gotten into lately that you’re during to pitch to people?

Let's see. ^.^ I'm currently watching Adventure Time. This is my first time watching every episode sequentially (circa 2013 or 2014 or so, I watched a spattering of episodes out of order but never finished the show). Currently in S6. I absolutely love how the world grows in Adventure Time. You can tell the early seasons were written with little in mind, simply going out, being wild, being spontaneous, and creating a wacky, trippy world. But that turned into a world with great depth, heart, and expansion as the series continues (especially once you enter Season 5). The worldbuilding is awesomely done.

I feel like lots of shows, when they transition from "early spontaneity" to "long-term comfort," they lose something. I think of Futurama. The early seasons of Futurama are incredible because it's not formulaic to the viewer; events are unexpected; new characters are introduced rather than repeated, expected, predictable recurrences. Futurama is still a HELL of a show in its middling seasons, etc. and a fave of mine. The Office (USA) also has that challenge/loss. But damn, Adventure Time managed the transition INCREDIBLY smoothly and well, I love how you settle into the world. How you get into the depth. How you get worldbuilding. How you get into deeper story messages. And how even in the midst of all that, you still maintain that spark, that spontaneity, that uniqueness, that vibe that made me get interested in the show in the first place.

Adventure Time straddles the line between two types of off-kilter: the positive, quirky-bright off-kilter, and the slight-off-slightly-dark-off-kilter. It's great. I've also heavily appreciated the cast of characters, how there's a ton of women characters, and how they're all very interesting, in-depth, and not standard/stereotypes.

But uhhhhhh. Really my current hyperfixation is. Uh. Bluegrass. [laughter] Seriously. Bluegrass. Especially first generation bluegrass circa 1940s-1960s. I made a fuckin' sideblog intentionally to avoid folks unwantedly suffering juxtaposition of fictional fandom and music history obsessing. Heh. Hilariously, I've been timid to show the true depths of my screeching passion. Rn I'm trying to do blog clean-up and a mini-restart (halfway through retagging my posts! and planning to change how I write my posts so they're shorter, etc.), and trying to get more outgoing... because let's be real, it's going to be more entertaining if I'm gungho crying screeching infodumping unrestrained about the subject, whatever your background is on the subject. I know I enjoy reading posts on any topic if the writer is sufficiently excited, so I need to uh, channel the excitement! SO THAT'S WHAT I AM PLANNING TO DO.

And seriously that's where all my excitement in life is right now!!! It's changed my life and I'm not even joking (not gonna go into here rn why but yeah it has). Like holy shit I can't get enough of reading about these dudes from the 1950s. I can't get enough listening to them, watching videos, learning the little nothings, the stupid humorous stories, the Drama(tm) between competing bands, the development of the music, me learning how to play banjo and fiddle, writing creative stories (fics????) inspired by the topic, everything!!! I can listen to a recording and tell you which fiddler is playing in this band or which mandolin picker or which tenor is singing and probably estimate what year it was recorded because like, holy shit man, I have found my CALLING. I've started collecting 100 year old records! I'm heading to a bluegrass festival this weekend for three solid days of internal (and probably external) fanboying. Gah it's like, fucking, there's all those K-Pop fans out there and they have each other to scream with, and i'm all here by my lonesome on this fucking genre. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT IT HAS CHANGED MY LIFE FOR THE BETTER so I cannot be happier at where my mind has headed.

So if you want to uhhhh read..... THAT??!?!?!?!?! uh? I mean, I don't expect you to be interested. BUT YOU ARE WELCOME TO COME ABOARD AND POKE ME and see what the stupid fucking shit I've somehow managed to get myself into. Okay but seriously it's so coool like all the different banjo playing styles??? How many people innovated their own style and taught themselves to play? ALL THE DIFFERENT INFLUENCES THAT GO INTO BLUEGRASS MUSIC??? How it's simultaneously a hella progressively innovative music style from its inception to today while also considered USA American traditional music? How many of these songs are several hundred years old and originated as English, Scottish, and the like folk tunes? How you might find out a bluegrass song actually originated as an obscure broadway tune that got coopted, or a Jamaican folk song, or big band jazz, or...? I mean holy cow dude, music is awesome and i'm so glad that it's a major part of my life again.

a;eogiaje;roigaje;roiagjerioj I have no idea if this is anything you wanted, but that's my answer I guess! Full of incoherence. Have a great one and stay awesome.

#long post #blabbing Haddock #ask #ask me #thatbanjobusiness #that banjo business #music #Adventure Time #AT #non-dragons #awesome anonymous friend #anonymous

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merakilyy · 4 years

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Lan Qiren is Not a Completely Terrible Parent + Bonus Headcanon

Some disorganized thoughts on Lan Qiren!

A lot of my thoughts on Lan Qiren come from a bilibili article breaking down what it means be be righteous (雅正) in accordance to the Lan Sect’s motto. The article is in Chinese so I’ll just sum up some of the major ideas first:

***

~It fundamentally refutes the idea of Lan Wangji as the “black sheep” in the Lan Sect

~It assumes Cloud Recesses has a highly collective intrasect environment. Children are raised not just by the parents, but by the entire Sect.

~The Elders raised Wangji and saw him grew up and didn’t have the heart to hurt Wangji, even after he escaped with Wei Wuxian into the cave. Western fandom especially tends to see the elders as strict, conservative disciplinarians who are rigid in their beliefs to the point of hypocrisy. This meta refutes that. It’s unreasonable that Wangji, no matter how strong his cultivation, would be able to stand on his own against 33 seasoned cultivators. So, contrary to popular belief, the elders allowed Wangji to injure them so they would not have to harm a child of the Sect.

~Lan Sect rules are not about what is literally written, but the spirit of the rules. This also makes sense given that when you have 4000+ rules, some rules are bound to contradict one another. And, many rules are quite vague. Eg. “sneering for no reason is prohibited.” Where is the line that justifies sneering? There is none because the idea is not “don’t sneer for no reason,” the idea is “don’t be unnecessarily rude.” In many of the rules, there is room for interpretation and it is this process of interpretation that is valued over the literal inscription of the rules.

~Basically, they are not good people because of the rules. They are good people because they are good people. The rules guide them to make good judgement, but good judgement does not comes from following the rules to a T.

~So the function of 雅正 (to be righteous) is internal, not performative.

~It is this internal clarity that makes Gusu Lan “innocent” (the word used is 纯真; 纯/chun = pure, clarity, genuine, practised and 真/zhen = true, real, genuine, clear)

~There is also a long history of Lans being deviant and rebellious. In CQL, there is Lan Yi who invents guqin battle techniques. They are also the only Clan to have been led by a female cultivator. Qingheng-jun clearly went against orthodoxy by marrying a murderer, but still remained in Cloud Recesses. We’re going to set aside consent here because is a total other separate conversation, but his punishment is self-imposed, not enforced by the Sect. So there are a lot of rules, but they aren’t pedantic. There is leeway, as seen in Lan Yi, but only within reason, as demonstrated by Qingheng-jun.

~Like his ancestors, Wangji also deviated from the straightforward path but his sect accepted his unrepentant love for Wei Wuxian in the end.

~In the end, Wangji gets what he wants: to live with Wei Wuxian in Cloud Recess. But he only gets this because the elders and Lan Qiren allow him to.

~To allow Wei Wuxian to exist in Cloud Recesses, the Lan Sect has to be more inclusive than we typically see them as.

~Despite everything, Lan Wangji still wants to return to Cloud Recesses because it is home to him.

~This is also my favourite explanation of Jingyi’s Jingyi-ness. Rather than Wangji (and possibly Xichen) singlehandedly creating a space for Jingyi, that space already existed. Jingyi isn’t as much of a black sheep as people portray him as because you don’t grow into a Jingyi if everyone is constantly yelling at you to follow rules. CQL Jingyi is plenty sassy, even in front of Lan Qiren, and Jingyi isn’t stupid! He was born and raised in Cloud Recesses, he knows when he is pushing several of the rules and he knows that he has the leeway to do so, and that Lan Qiren will not stop him (within reason).

~”Be righteous” is how the Lan motto is translated in English, but it’s….not exactly what it is in Chinese.

~In modern Chinese, it’s 雅正. 雅/ya = elegance, graceful and 正/zheng = positive, correct, straight, just.

~Notice how the two parts of the motto contrast one another. Ya is outward, something that dictates how you act. Zheng is internal, determined by your actions and attitudes. Zheng is the foundation of Ya.

~As a related aside, the literary meaning of 雅正 is slightly different; it means to be correct and honest, and to welcome corrections to one’s shortcomings. The literary 雅 is to be proper。

~The meta ends with this beautiful line: 所谓的“雅正”，家族交出来，体雅是表象，心正才是更本。Now to ruin it in translation: “Each configuration of “righteousness,” as taught by the Sect, is outward physical elegance built on the foundation of a moral heart.”

~TLDR: Rebelliousness is a function of Gusu Lan, not an anomaly.

***

Onto some fun headcanons!

~Lan Qiren has personal issues with Wei Wuxian because of his mother, but he is more horrified by Wei Wuxian because Wei Wuxian has all this potential and then uses it to go down the heretial path?? Blaphemous. All that ability, all that work, only to throw it all away? Wei Wuxian is incredibly competent and Lan Qiren begrudgingly respects that competence. What he can’t stand is Wei Wuxian’s lackadaisical attitude towards his cultivation.

~In novel canon, Lan Qiren accepts Wangji and Wei Wuxian’s marriage. He definitely still has issues with Wei Wuxian for being a mass murderer, a demonic cultivator, for desecrating the dead, etc. Also for his general Wei Wuxian-ness. But Wei Wuxian is nothing is not incredibly competent and Lan Qiren eventually softens towards Wei Wuxian because of that competence. Once Wei Wuxian starts using that competence to be useful to the Sect and not just to be as annoying as possible, he gets Lan Qiren’s approval.

~Secretly, of course. Lan Qiren would qi deviate before saying nice about Wei Wuxian to his face.

~I totally wrote a fic on Lan Qiren publicly defending Wei Wuxian heheh

~Cloud Recesses is only so big and Lan Qiren can’t avoid Wei Wuxian, even if he is never trying to seek him out. Plus, Wei Wuxian has this way of being in the most inconvenient place at the most inconvenient time.

~We all agree Wei Wuxian is a terrible cook. But, is he a bad cook because he adds too much spice, or he is a bad cook because he’s a bad cook? He did manage to cook congee for the ducklings in Yi Cheng without any fatalities. so I’m inclined to believe the former.

~Lan Qiren definitely thinks Wei Wuxian is a terrible cook, especially after hearing about how Wei Wuxian burned a hole in a pot.

~But Wei Wuxian is Wei Wuxian and even if he can’t be trusted with spices (or anything remotely resembling seasoning), he can make plain congee just fine....after some practice

~Lan Qiren eats this congee and it’s a perfectly good congee. Ideal thickness, light taste, no spices, slides down the throat smoothly and pairs perfectly with his dried zhacai (pickled mustard; a super common Chinese side dish). He asks who made the congee, expecting it to be Sizhui. He chokes when he is told Wei Wuxian is the cook.

~Lan Qiren knows how to be a good parent in theory. He’s just terrible at putting it to practice.

~Jingyi’s parents, when he was still a terrible toddler wreaking havoc everywhere, went to Lan Qiren for desperate advice like “why is our child such a terrible Lan???”

~But Jingyi isn’t actually Lan Qiren’s kid so he actually gives good advice. “Give him a toy, he’ll tire himself out for his nap,” “Let him crawl around, just cover sharp objects and table corners,” and “give him a crushed peach as a reward for walking across the room”

~But he doesn’t know how to talk to Xichen or Wangji as family. He loves them both dearly – obviously he raised them, but they’re also good nephews!! Questionable taste in men aside, they are excellent nephews! He just doesn’t know how to talk to them outside of official sect business.

~Especially with Wangji, He kind of did declare Wangji’s husband a heretic, a traitor, was extra hard on Wei Wuxian as a student, Wangji for visiting Wei Wuxian. And there’s that whole discipline whip thing.

~Which, to be fair, did end up saving Wangji’s life. Raising his sword against Sect Elders and one’s own family is an act of treason punishable by execution. But Lan Qiren can’t just execute his own nephew….he has a heart, even if no one believes it

~33 discipline lashes from the discipline whip is very harsh and Lan Qiren won’t pretend otherwise. But he could gamble that Wangji’s core is strong enough to pull him through. Because the odds of a living, resentful Wangji is better than a dead Wangji.

~They never talk about this. There are a lot of things they don’t talk about.

~Even before, Lan Qiren isn’t a bad parent. He just has no idea how to put his ideas of parenting into practice. He knows what a good parent looks like, he just doesn’t know how to be one.

~So he hides behind the rules because the rules can’t go that wrong, right? Right???

~Lan Qiren is lowkey jealous of Wei Wuxian for knowing how to be affectionate. He definitely thinks Wei Wuxian is too open with his emotions, but he is envious that Wei Wuxian and Wangji are open to each other in a way that Lan Qiren never established with either nephew. They are loyal in the filial manner of juniors to their elders, but Lan Qiren isn’t exactly close to his nephews.

~In his ongoing attempt to be a better uncle, he ends up getting advice from Wei Wuxian about emotions.

~It’s not like he can go to anyone else. And, well. That congee was really good.

~Turns out Wei Wuxian can brew the perfect pot of tea, too.

~Offensive. That Wei Wuxian is so competent and the least emotionally repressed person in all of Cloud Recesses.

~Eventually, Lan Qiren begins to understand why Wangji is so attached to Wei Wuxian, even if he still can’t stand to be in the same room as Wei Wuxian for longer than 15 minutes.

~No matter how much he might no longer hate Wei Wuxian, he prefers their interactions in small doses and spaced out.

~But he does learn to bond with Wei Wuxian over cultivation theory. Annoyingly, Wei Wuxian is just too useful to continue to despise.

#mdzs #the untamed #mo dao zu shi #cql #lan qiren #meta meta meta

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our-flag-means-death-ao3feed · 1 year

Text

The Stowaway

by ShesAKillerQueen98

Ah uninvited guest is discovered in the cargo hold the morning after the fuckery. Things are quickly turned on their head when she reveals why she was on the ship…and who she’s looking for

Words: 3423, Chapters: 1/4, Language: English

Series: Part 1 of The Songbird Chronicles

Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Characters: Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Stede Bonnet, Original Female Character(s), Original Child Character(s), Jim Jimenez, Lucius Spriggs, Frenchie (Our Flag Means Death), Buttons (Our Flag Means Death), Oluwande Boodhari, Black Pete (Our Flag Means Death), Fang (Our Flag Means Death)

Relationships: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Additional Tags: Blackbeard | Edward Teach Loves Stede Bonnet, Stede Bonnet Loves Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Pre-Relationship, Idiots in Love, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Has Abandonment Issues, Soft Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Blackbeard | Edward Teach is Bad at Feelings, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Needs a Hug, Stede Bonnet is Trying His Best, Stede Bonnet is Bad at Feelings, Competent Stede Bonnet, for like 2 seconds, The rest of the time he’s an idiot, Stede Bonnet Being an Idiot, Oblivious Stede Bonnet, Stede Bonnet is a dad, Soft Stede Bonnet, Protective Jim Jimenez, Original Character(s), Major Original Character(s), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Stede Bonnet is a Good Dad

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/43198842

#Our flag means death #ofmd

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tren-fraszka · 3 years

Text

Fic in a Box 2021 Exchange Letter

Dear creator,

Thank you for taking your time to check my requests. I know my requests can sound a bit tricky, but please don’t be discouraged. I wish you will have good time writing first and foremost!

My AO3 is Tren, if you wish to check it out.

Likes: comedy, casefics, canon compliants, AUs, time loops, bodyswaps, roleswaps, “being hoisted by your own petard” plotlines, snark, pettiness, rivals, enemies to friends to lovers, violence, friendships, and character bonding,

DNW: explicit sex (makeouts and fade to black is okay), A/B/O, mpreg, rape depicted as positive (so no “it’s okay, because the other person enjoyed it/it was what they truly wanted”), trans headcanons, soulmate AUs, stories ending with surrender to fate/destiny, fourth wall breaking in canons where that doesn’t occur, character has cancer or other real-life terminal disease AU, word “queerplatonic”.

Also, I included what ships I’m okay with in each fandom. Please do not include any ships that aren’t canon and I have not allowed in those sections (if you feel really strongly about a ship I haven’t mentioned, you can always ask through mods just in case).

On a separate, but similar note, I’m okay with OCs as long as they don’t overshadow the characters I requested.

Additionally, while I almost never request fanart as possible medium, because I prefer my main gift to be fic, I would be very okay with receiving fanart treats. Also, feel free to peruse my old letters if you get your hands on them. I never stop being interested in fandoms, and if I requested something once I will still want it in the future.

REQUESTS

Medium opt-ins (they are the same for all the fandoms):

Length Opt-In: Drabble Length Opt-In: Drabble Series Medium Opt In: Any - Any In-Universe Documents Medium Opt In: Art - Drawn - Comics Medium Opt In: Art - Drawn - Fanart Medium Opt In: Art - Excerpts from a Character's Sketchbook Medium Opt In: Art - Tarot Card Medium Opt In: Illustrated Text (Art & Writing) - Bureaucratic Paperwork Medium Opt In: Illustrated Text (Art & Writing) - Excerpts from a Journal/Notebook/Sketchbook Medium Opt In: Illustrated Text (Art & Writing) - Field Report Medium Opt In: Illustrated Text (Art & Writing) - Mission Report Medium Opt In: Illustrated Text (Art & Writing) - In-Universe Scientific Documents Medium Opt In: Writing - Unreliable Narrator Medium Opt In: Writing - Non-Linear Narrative

MARIMASHITA! IRUMA-KUN

I read new manga chapters as they get translated so feel free to incorporate anything from the manga that’s available in English.

Kirio Amy/Suzuki Iruma

There are many good ships with Iruma, but this one just has a lot things I like. I love enemy ships with both sides being way too emotionally invested into each other so this was inevitable. I love how this relationship starts as this really wholesome friendship and school festival preparation, except Kirio turns out to be a bit messed up and wants to blow up everyone. But then they both accept the outcome and go on with their lives still thinking about each other. Iruma goes through a lot of trouble to keep the club operating even though Kirio has been pretty much expelled. And then Kirio is now obsessed with Iruma as his anthitesis and perfect enemy.

I’m okay with the potential story happening at any point in the canon. I would love both a story set before the festival while Kirio is still hiding his true colors or a story set after it. Maybe Iruma runs into Kirio somewhere after he escapes prison and instead of calling an adult, he tries to stop Kirio from causing trouble on his own. As for pre-festival story. Maybe some upperclassmen steal important parts from the club and Iruma and Kirio set out to get them back.

Naberius Callego & Suzuki Iruma

I love Callego for being a much better take on Snape than original Snape ever was. The second the series made Callego Iruma’s familiar I knew this was about to get good. And it was. I love how Callego slowly warms up to Iruma, even if he is still allergic to his and Sullivan’s antics. I love that Callego is actually a competent teacher who cares about his students, but at the same time he would rather eat a whole lemon than admit it out loud.

For prompts, maybe Sullivan ends up having an important business and Opera isn’t available so he dumps looking after Iruma on Callego for a few days. Or Iruma is struggling with studying since so many things are new for him, so Callego ends up forced to help him catch up with the material (if you are following manga inclusion of Balam is always welcome). Or maybe Iruma gets into usual trouble ends up stranded somewhere and the only one he can call for help is his familiar.

Crocell Kerori | Kuromu/Gyari

One of the last thing I expected to get this year was a canonical yuri romance in this manga, but here it is and it’s perfect. I love how it is pretty much built on mutual pining. I love how Kuromu loves Gyari, but refuses to reciprocate her feelings, because she knows that she needs to remain unattainable to keep their relationship alive, and I love how Gyari is never ever going to give up.

I would love to see more of the time when they worked together. We know it was love at the first sight for Gyari, but I would love to see how Kuromu’s feelings grew. Those hours they spent together practicing, maybe a not-date where they sneak together to scout a venue where they will be having their first big concert, or maybe a small contest that would sow the seeds for their future rivalry. I would love any and all of it. Also, Gyari doesn’t seem to be aware of Kuromu’s civilian identity, so I would love a story where Gyari meets Crocell Kerori rather than Kuromu. Does she recognize her? Or does Kerori manage to successfully trick her? Maybe Gyari makes a full investigation after hearing rumors that Kuromu is attending Babylys. I would also love any sort of future fic for those two.

AUs and ships

I love the worldbuilding around the demon world, so I would ask that if you decided to write an AU that it still incorporates demons. I would definitely love an AU where rather than getting summoned to demon world, Iruma accidentally summons either Kirio or Callego into the human world. Maybe Iruma’s parents try to use him as an offering, but instead he ends up bound to a demon. I would love to see Kirio excited to unleash suffering (even if his weak powers severely limit him in that regard) onto human world just to discover that he made contract with the biggest pacifist possible. Or Callego being torn between wanting to return home as soon as possible (he has classes to teach!) and wanting to somehow help the weird human child that just keeps getting into trouble. Any other demon-focused AU is also welcome. For Gyari and Kurmou, maybe one of them is a human who ends up summoning the other as a demon. How different would their relationship be then? I’m also fine with any sort of AU divergences scenario. Maybe Iruma keeps accidentally sabbotaging Kirio’s terrorist plans without realizing it. Or Iruma ends up summoning Callego more often as his familiar when he gets into trouble. What if Gyari also attended Babylys.

As for ships, I’d rather avoid any love triangle scenarios for this canon, so please focus on just one pairing per character (competing for Iruma’s attention is normal for this canon, I’d just rather not see outright romantic competition). It’s self-explainatory for Kirio request, but if you want to include some shipping elements into the other requests I also ship Iruma/Amelie and Callego/Balam.

VIVY: FLUORITE EYE’S SONG

Solo: Vivy

WB: Any

I would love a look into some alternate timelines or missing scenes. Feel free to go as tragic as you like for alternate timelines, or make a happy end, or anything in between. I just think the core concept of the show has a lot of potential in that regard. For a more specific prompts I would love an AU where Diva doesn't disappear, but maybe she and Vivy end up spliting in some way (I'm sure Matsumoto could find a spare body or something). Or maybe a story where one of the Sisters ends up dragged into Singularity project (I really loved what they did with Elizabeth in the show).

For more worldbuilding prompts I would love a more in-depth look of how Matsumoto as more advanced AI differs from the past eye and how that gap is slowly being closed with each case he and Vivy resolves. Or outsider POV on how Vivy’s and Matsumoto’s actions shape the world. Them turning off the plant producing new androids and the subsequent suicide would definitely get coverage. I would love to know how the whole thing was officially explained. Are there conspiracy theories on the Internet? Sisters are involved in every major incident, would people suspect something?

AUs and ships

I would prefer no setting changes for this story. Any other AUs are fine. As mentioned I would love any look for alternate timeline. I would also love an AU where Diva doesn’t recover her memories and keeps helping Matsumoto while trying to regain them.

Any canon pairings are fine.

SOUSOU NO FRIEREN

I read new manga chapters as they get translated so feel free to incorporate anything from the manga that’s available in English.

Frieren

Frieren/Himmel

I love how this manga is a slow-paced fantasy dealing with loss and inevitable passage of time. And I love Frieren for being one of the best depictions of an elf whose long life actually affects their outlook on life and actions.

I would equally love the insight into Frieren’s present with her charges and the past with hero party. What other shenanigans they get into on their journey? What kind of weird magic Frieren pursued? I would love to see more of her mentoring Fern and Stark. I also love to see her interactions with the hero party. Maybe some more insight into how they fought with demons, since Frieren seemed to have picked up a number of enemies during that time. For some more specific prompts: maybe Frieren accidentally stumbles ona cursed item that erases her memories (or just her memories of Himmel). How would it affect her? What would the party do to help her? Or maybe a demon kidnaps someone from Frieren’s party?

Feel free to include any other characters, they are a colorful bunch.

AUs and ships

I’m fine with AUs as long as Frieren’s long lifespan is preserved. Her perspective is very much shaped by how long she has lived, so I wouldn’t want that aspect to change. One exception would be, a roleswap where Himmel is an elf, while Frieren is a human, and exploration of how both of them would be affected by having a different lifespan. An AU with mythological creatures or similar could be interesting.

I would very much love Himmel/Frieren, though I also enjoy how the manga softly builds on their connection. I also enjoy the budding romance between Fern and Stark.

ONMYOJI

I like all the characters so feel free to include any of them in the story. Bonus points for Ennmusubi doing some subtle matchmaking.

Hakuro/Kusa

I love both of them and how much Kusa looks up to Hakuro. I would love to see them have some adventures together. Maybe they help some other youkai? Or one of the onmyoji? I would also love a deeper insight into how Kusa became stronger after getting inspired by Hakuro. How did she try to improve herself? There definitely was some trial and error and I would love to see that.

Shiranui/Kinnara

That pairing came out of the left field for me, but I absolutely love the interactions the two of them had so far. I would love to see them meeting more, their feelings growing each time they see each other. I also feel like a story where they keep meeting each other in a dream would really fit them, as they would long to finally meet each other in reality.

AUs and ships

I’m fine with any AU. A modern AU with archer Hakuro and gardener Kusa would be cute. Or a dancer Shiranui and a musican Kinnara. Alternatively an AU where one of the two is onmyoji could be very interesting.

I’m fine with Hakuro’s admiration for Hiromasa being present as long as it doesn’t overshadow her relationship with Kusa.

DRESDEN FILES

Harry Dresden/Lara Raith

I was sceptical of this pairing all the way through Peace Talks, but then Harry and Lara had this intense falling out, Murphy had died, and suddenly this is a supernatural arranged political marriage and I love everything about this situation. I mean everything. Harry still being in mourning and absolutely not wanting to be forced into this arrangement, Lara still being distrustful of Harry, suspecting that Dresden is using their brother as a bargaining chip, Mab expecting both of them to present themselve as a couple for political reasons. It’s just terrible time for both of them, but so much fun for me.

I would love to see them forced to attend various supernatural events to present themselves per Mab’s wishes. How badly would Dresden handle it? Also it was confirmed that he was marked with true love which means he and Lara probably can’t even touch directly. How well do they hide that fact from everyone? How much guilt would Harry have once he realized that the mark has weakened or disappeared now that he started to develop feelings for Lara? How much chaos will ensue when the wedding does happen?

AUs and ships

I don’t want any setting AU for this fandom, because the existing setup is just too perfect. I’m fine with a divergence AU as long as Lara and Harry are still forced into arranged marriage.

I would want for Harry’s past relationships be acknowledged mostly because him being in mourning is part of what I find appealing about his situation. I don’t expect any scenes actually showing him with his past lovers, but I would be very okay with them appearing.

TALES OF CRESTORIA

Feel free to include other Tales characters. My faves are the cast of Xillia, Symphonia and Graces, but I’m also fine with including other characters (I would appreciate proper introductions in that case, I still haven’t played some of the games, so I might not recognize everyone just by their name).

Solo: Lloyd Irving

I would love more insight into small, but murdeous Lloyd. Seriously I loved the idea of Lloyd originally being manipulated into killing Colette and would love to see Lloyd remembering his lost memories at some point (bonus points for also exploring the idea of Colette as an artificial construct). Also I'm always a sucker for Kratos and Lloyd awkwardly trying to rebuild their familial bonds. What if Lloyd went with Kratos after all? What would happen if they ran into each other again.

Stahn Aileron & Leon Magnus

I would love more of Leon's utter suffering as he searches for a way to turn his best friend back into human, so people stop thinking he's crazy whenever he tells his sword to shut up. I would love to see him reunite with Crestoria’s main cast and getting annoyed at how chaotic they are. Or running into Sorey again. Honestly, I would love seeing him interact with pretty much anyone, and grumpily helping them kill monsters/do charity/etc. Or exploring Stahn’s and Leon’s past. I would love to see their childhood and how they grew to be such a good friends.

I haven’t played Destiny, so please give me context if you want to include any elements that aren’t in Crestoria.

Velvet Crowe/Milla Maxwell

I thrive on the twisted codependency those two have in Crestoria. I will take both good, tragic and/or ambiguous ends for this relationship. Whether Velvet decides to forgive Milla or kill her it will be great. Give me all those twisted emotions, the hesitation, and pain both of them are carrying.

For straightforward approach, maybe the two of them stop in a town while chasing the last Incarnation and Milla decides to throw a party (because it’s some sort of festival, or maybe she found out it’s Velvet’s or Laphicet’s birthday and wants to make some amends however small). Or maybe one of them gets hurt during the fight with an Incarnation and the other ends up nursing them to health.

For some more levity, maybe Velvet and Milla ran out of money and pick up some side-job to have enough money for an inn. Maybe they work as waitresses and are both great and terrible at it at the same time. Or they have to take care of kids. Any other amusing job is also good.

AUs and ships

I’m fine with any AUs, though for Stahn&Leon request I still want Stahn to be the sword. I’m okay with Stahn turning human (or from human to sword) in the course of the story or being human when showing his past with Leon.

I don’t want Velvet or Milla paired with anyone else or Asbel/Cheria. Other than that there’s too much ships. Please inquire through the mods about specific ones.

FATE/GRAND ORDER

WB: Any

Please only include NA content, I want to avoid JP spoilers

I would love to explore any part of the setting really. I especially love the various interesting connections Servant have with each other that might not be obvious at first glance (like the fact that Iskander is also a pharaoh). I’m just fascinated by all the intricate historical connections. I would also love to see how some Servants would react if they were taken to Singularity/Lostbelt/Event they weren’t a part of.

Alternatively I would love to see exploration on how different the protagonists upbringing is from other mages especially given how bad they are at magic. We get some of it with Crypters (I loved how frustrated Kadoc was at the fact that the protagonist is even worse at magic than him), but I would love to see more of it. Maybe some Servants try to teach protagonist magic or prepare them for interactions with Clock Tower mages.

I'm fine with both male and female protagonist. Feel free to do anything from a serious character exploration to zany antics. I love both moods FGO jumps between, you can't go wrong with that. Historical context always welcome. I'm fine for any usual suspects when it comes to plot ideas: be it training simulator shenanigans, "oh no we lost comms and are stuck in Singularity", Moriarty scheming, to someone wanting to make Master happy in their own special, dysfunstional and/or possibly destructive ways

Some of the characters I enjoy: Gilgamesh (any), Mordred, Karna, Medea, Saint Martha, Ereshikigal, Danzo, Jeanne D'Arc Alter, Mysterious Heroine XX, Sitonai, Moriarty, Goredolf, any character from pairings section solo. Though honestly I love pretty much everyone in Chaldea except Columbus.

AUs and ships

Obviously, no setting changes AUs, but feel free to Canon Divergence

Pairings: Amakusa/Semiramis, Izou/Ryouma, Kintoki/Fuuma, Romani/Merlin, Romani/protagonist. Also feel free to assume protagonist/everyone (except the "child" Servants). Feel free to ask about other pairings through mods, I’m definitely missing some

#exchange letters

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eurosong · 3 years

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Undo my ESC '21 (semi-final two)

Good afternoon folks, and welcome to the second part of Undo my ESC – my annual quest to make the year’s Eurovision better (at least, for me xD) by making a feasible change in each country – it could be something as small as altering a lyric or a staging detail, or as big as a different artist entirely winning the NF. Semi-final one was here so let's jump straight into SF2!

🇸🇲 San Marino: We're thrown into the deep end here with a fan fav that doesn't do at all for me. I'm one of maybe 5 people on the planet who prefers Freaky by far, I guess? I'm happy for Senhit to be getting so much love and for the diminutive serene republic to finally have a shot at a good result - but I'm not so keen on the way it's been done. There's a bit of cognitive dissonance for me because my favourite thing about Adrenalina is Flo Rida's rap, but I don't like the idea of bringing in famed American artists like "ringers" to elevate a song above one with "only" local talent. I would be so tempted to give the rap part to local artist IROL instead to spit some hot bars in Italian.

🇪🇪 Estonia: I had hope this year, I really did, for my era of absolutely adoring Estonia at ESC to be revived after 4 painful years. There were so many good songs at this year's Eesti Laul, like those of Ivo Linna, Egert, Gram of fun, Heleza - but ultimately, my huge favourite was, as expected, Jüri Pootsmann. Anyone who followed this blog back in 2016 knows how much I adore Jüri and was desperate to see him get a redemption arc at ESC itself. Magus melanhoolia was one of the best songs of the season for me and one of the best stagings. As much as I prefer '20 artists to get their shot in '21, problematic Uku with his toxic ex vibes song will have to step aside and let the Jüri renaissance happen here.

🇨🇿 Czechia: I really dig Benny Cristo - he has personality, presence and his own enjoyable style. At first I was kinda disappointed with Omaga because I was expecting something more in the vein of Kemama, with more pronounced Afrobeat influences. But it has grown on me a lot too. My change? Add more Czech than just one blink-and-you-miss-it line, mate! (Article continues below)

🇬🇷 Greece: I see this being talked up as potential televote top 3 and I just don't get it. Maybe it's the way the chorus rhymes dance with itself three times (and uses the term rockin' romance unironically); maybe it's the way that there are better 80s-inspired songs both in ESC and many fallen tributes in the NF season... it just leaves me cold. I actually preferred Supergirl and my change would be for Stefania to bring something with some actual Greek flair.

🇦🇹 Austria: I’ll echo what I said last year about Österreich – how did they go from Conchita to a guy who wished he wouldn’t have gay kids like this? I find both of this guy's songs insipid in different ways and I would invite Pænda back instead to avenge her getting robbed with the beautiful Limits. Or give a second shot at glory to the incredible Cesár!

🇵🇱 Poland: Unpopular opinion, but I absolutely love The Ride, and I feel bad for Alicja, but I much prefer it to Empires. What started as an ironic fondness for Rafał's cringy uncle vibes ended up being genuine appreciation - it's one of the few 80s-inspired songs that sound like they actually could have come out of that decade rather than like modern pastiches. And Raf actually does have an awkward charisma. My change - insert some Polish! Poland does so well with natural sounding bilingual efforts in JESC, they should bring it to the main contest too!

🇲🇩 Moldova: I was lowkey prepared to be disappointed by Moldova - I actually enjoyed Prison a lot and the news that they were going in a completely different direction didn't sit so well with me. And yet, I also love Sugar. Natalia's power! My changes: get rid of that weird scene with literally egg on her face - too on the nose for me. And incorporate a bit of the stellar Russian translation, Tuz bubi, because I'm always going to be advocating for more linguistic diversity xD

🇮🇸 Iceland: Daði Freyr can literally do no wrong with me. Whilst it doesn't have the same intense extra-fandom hype that Think about things did, I think I like Ten years even more. Nothing to change here.

🇷🇸 Serbia: It's no secret that Hurricane were far from my favourites at Beovizija 20, and that I find this a downgrade for Sanja compared to her powerful '16 song. And yet... Hasta la vista grew on me a lot, and so has Loco loco. It's something that is definitely scratching an itch at this year's ESC and the burst of anarchic energy it'll provide will be amazing. I am seriously tempted to change to the acoustic version, though, which has all the attitude of the original but is more beautiful for me and lets the girls' voices shine more.

🇬🇪 Georgia: Georgia keeps serving acquired tastes, and as a patron saint of marginal genres and I love them for that. This year, they've gone for something that even many fans of Tornike find hard to swallow - gone is the roaring rock of last year, replaced with a much more contemplative, soft effort that reminds me a little of Lou Reed. I enjoy both songs, but I can't deny preferring 2020. At the same time, I admire the chutzpah required to send something so different. I just wish there could be a moment to properly showcase T's powerhouse vocals.

🇦🇱 Albania: It was an odd Festival i këngës this year, outdoors in the freezing cold and without the orchestra that makes the songs soar so much more for me. Karma is a perfectly respectable winner, albeit one that lacks the immediacy and rawness of Shaj, Ktheju tokës and Mall. In my ideal alternate reälity, Arilena Ara would have been invited back. She'd bring a song as beautiful as Shaj - and not do a revamp into English that removes its edge this time.

🇵🇹 Portugal: 2015-2020 was a full on Portugal stan era for me. I want to believe that this year is an aberration and that in 2022, our lusitanian neighbours will produce the goods once again. Because ending a colossal streak of not sending songs that don't include Portuguese for this? I am baffled. I wanted the anthemic Joana do mar, produced beautifully by Luísa Sobral, or the timeless Contramão, which sounds like it escaped a Nouvelle Vague soundtrack. Saudade, Por um triz or a number of others would have been grand too.

🇧🇬 Bulgaria: I wasn't expecting much from Bulgaria - I really didn't and don't like TGS and the majority of songs in Victoria's NF-but-not-really aren't my cup of tea. I was happy she got her second chance, but resigned to not liking the song much that would get picked. And then, my fav, which was last in many community ratings, ended up being her pick. I adore GUIGO and believe it has the possibility to do very, very well at Rotterdam and be one of the 'moments' of the evening.

🇫🇮 Finland: CRIMINAL how YLE treated Aksel - it felt like he wasn't the defending champion, and that Erika Vikman had won the previous year. They also - I believe, deliberately - split his vote by making his just one of a number of ballads, so of course what stood out most were the two decidedly non-ballady songs. Finland only two years ago had a single-artist UMK. They could and should have brought it back for Aksel. I'd hope Hurt would win it, because that song is stunning.

🇱🇻 Latvia: I was, and am, delighted that Latvia stuck with Samanta Tina. The lady lives and breathes ESC, even wrote a university thesis about it, and if she tried so many times, finally won and then DIDN'T get to go to ESC, I would have gone to LTV headquarters personally to remonstrate. I really like both her songs. The moon is rising is poised, powerful and like nothing else this year. The only thing I'd change is adding some Latvian because it's a gorgeous language and we've been waiting for ages to hear it again.

🇨🇭 Switzerland: Gjon's song is once again not really my cup of tea, or tears - but I enjoy it better than last year's and I'm glad he's back. Highkey wish it did include Albanian or Romansch like confused commenters last year thought it did.

🇩🇰 Denmark: There is literally no excuse for Denmark's treatment of Ben & Tan. I'm not even a big fan of their music at all, out to not even allow them to compete in DMGP to defend their win with Iron heart? Even though there are songs that competed in DMGP that I prefer a lot, most notably Står lige her, I would probably have let them have a proper second chance.

And the automatic qualifiers voting in this semi -

🇫🇷 France: For me, France had an absolutely enthralling, sincere, perfectly Gallic entry that hit me so hard in the feels. And whilst I respect Voilà, no, that wasn't it. It was Pourvu qu'on m'aime, easily one of the best songs I heard all year inside NFs or out. I find Voilà a little too mannered and affected, whilst PQM is a shot straight from Juliette's heart into mine. In my dream, it'd have won CVQD and be receiving the same love that Voilà is right now.

🇪🇸 Spain: Whilst it is getting next to no love in the fandom and seems quite forgotten, I find Voy a quedarme one of the best songs sent from this country in several years - and I say that having preferred Memoria. I am proud of Blas and love that he had a hand in writing this song. My change? He said recently that the staging in Rotterdam won't be inspired by the poignant music video despite wanting it to be - I would incorporate elements from it in the live.

🇬🇧 United Kingdom: Frankly, I think almost all the Big 5+1 brought it this year, with the notable exception of Germany. Embers is the banger that I never thought was coming from James Newman, and it's been one of the biggest earworms of the season. I wouldn't change anything about it - I'd just ensure that the staging replicated the energy of the video as much as possible!

#eurovision #esc 2021 #opinion #eurovision song contest #eurovision 2021

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stevesnailbat · 4 years

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what the future holds | steve harrington

REQUEST: hey! can you write a fic where reader feels really bad over future/college/career stuff and steve catches her crying over that and comforts her? thank you 💗

summary: Steve comforts you after finding you worrying about your future plans.

warnings: mentions of anxiety

word count: 1.4K

a/n: this is very self-indulgent but I'm not sorry about it <3 hope you all enjoy!

An English paper due by Friday. Three exams and two quizzes this week. Ten scholarship applications due by the end of the month. A job interview next week.

It feels like you have an endless to-do list and that you’re adding two more items to it every time you cross one off. It’s overwhelming, to say the least. You haven’t gotten a break from life in months, it had been almost half a year now since you’d had more than three days in a row to yourself. Life isn’t slowing down any time soon, so you can’t either.

You can’t help but feel hopeless, like there’s nothing you can do to keep up with everything whizzing past you. It’s hard not to feel like you’re so far behind compared to your classmates, or that you’ll never be as successful as them. Everyone around you seems to keep it together so well, you spend your days fixated on how to get yourself into that routine but it never seems to happen.

The list in front of you as you sit at your desk is daunting, looking at the fifteen tasks to tick off in the next ten hours makes your stomach twist. It’s eight in the morning and—for some reason—you’re up. Being productive is the only way you know how to feel satisfied anymore, nothing else gives you the same gratification. You wonder if you’ll even get past the first four before your anxiety gets the best of you, but you shove your feelings down and start to get to work.

It only takes a few hours for you to feel completely defeated. You’ve been distracted the whole time, the only thought on your mind the whole time is how you can’t compare to everyone around you. You tell yourself your grades aren’t good enough, you’re not competitive enough, you’ll never stand out in the scholarship applications or the job interviews. Everyone else with your major and career track will always seem better than you, and you feel like giving up.

Focusing on the four-page paper in front of you is impossible now, so you opt for distracting yourself with a nap. It seems like the easy way out, sleeping the feelings and doubts away. But, it’s never that easy. You never fall asleep fast enough and your thoughts consume you, anxiety taking over as you think of everything you should be doing instead of sitting in bed. It’s even harder to get yourself out of bed once you’ve gotten there, so you stay.

The tears come soon after, spilling down your cheeks as you run through your to-do list in your mind over and over again. You don’t really know how much time passes from your bed, but you know you’re wasting it. Your thoughts are interrupted when you hear the front door to your apartment open, signaling that your boyfriend is there. There’s not much you can do to stop him from seeing you like this, but you try to cover it all up by wiping your tears and going back to your desk.

When Steve knocks on the bedroom door, he sees you at your desk but knows immediately that you haven’t actually been doing any work. The tear-stained sleeve of your sweatshirt and puffy eyes are the first things he notices when you look up at him. You furrow your brows at him when he frowns at you, setting his bag down on the floor before walking over to you.

“What?” you ask with a confused frown, but you know exactly why he’s looking at you like that.

“What’s wrong?” Steve questions while standing in front of you at your desk chair, reaching out to run his thumb along your cheek gently.

“Nothing?” you lie, but he gives you an incredulous look and you sigh. “It’s nothing, Steve.”

“Are you sure? Because this kinda says differently.” he implores, tugging at your soaked sleeve.

“I don’t want to talk about it, okay?” you snap, pulling your arm back as you curl your legs up against your chest.

Steve watches quietly as you rub your hands across your eyes, trying to hide the tears you just blinked away. His heart aches at the sight of you struggling, but isn’t sure how he can really help. He reaches for your hand again and jerks his chin towards the bed, motioning for you to come with him. Once he gets you to stand up, he sits on the end of your bed and pulls you into his lap, his hand running through your hair slowly.

“Y’know you can talk to me, right?” he mumbles, pressing a kiss to your forehead as you nod. “Then will you tell me what’s on your mind right now?”

You look up at him with teary eyes and a quivering lip, blinking a few times as he strokes your hair. You open your mouth to speak, but only a small whimper escapes your lips as tears finally spill from your eyes. Steve’s gaze softens at the sight, pulling you closer to him as you bury your face in his chest.

“I—I can’t do it.” you cry, voice muffled by Steve’s shirt. “I’m so scared that I’m gonna—gonna fail, Steve.”

He frowns at your words and looks over to your desk, noticing the disarray and unfinished to-do list on the table top. Even looking at the list you wrote concerns him, you’re spreading yourself too thin and it’s starting to show. Steve listens to ramble about wanting to quit and how you think you won’t ever succeed for a moment, but can’t take hearing it for too long. He finally reaches down, hooking his finger under your chin to make you look up at him. His eyes are sad looking back at your teary ones, you can tell he’s hurting for you.

“I don’t really know the exact words to say to you right now, but I do know that you’re not a failure and that you’re so—so smart.” he says softly, sighing as you shake your head in disbelief. “Hey, please. Please, I want you to feel better.” he pleads, a desperate look on his face as he speaks. “I just want you to see what I see, okay?”

“Everyone else is doing so much better than me. I can’t compete, Steve.” you whine, shaking your head once again.

“Yes, you can! You’re just putting too much on your plate at once, it’s making you stress out more than you need to be.” he explains, pointing to the to-do list on your desk. “You don’t need to do that much stuff in one day to be successful, I know all of that isn’t due today. You’re already so successful without all the cramming and shit.”

“I—I just don’t stand out like the rest of the people in my classes.” you say, leaning into his touch as he cups your cheek. “They’re all getting job offers and internships and I—I know I’m not gonna be able to compete.”

“Please, stop saying that.” Steve says, shaking his head at you. “You are just as good—honestly probably better than most of the people in your classes. I wish you’d see that.”

“You don’t have to say that, Steve.” you say quietly.

“I’m not just saying it to make you feel better, if that’s what you’re thinking.” he replies. “It’s the truth, you’re amazing.”

“You mean it?” you question, looking up at him with hopeful eyes, needing the reassurance more than anything.

“Of course I do, you’re the smartest person I know.” he says with a genuine smile, pressing a kiss to your lips. “An absolute genius.”

“Okay, now you’re pushing it.” you giggle, wiping some rogue tears from your cheeks as he leans down to kiss you again.

“I’m being serious! You’re my beautiful, successful genius.” he chuckles, staring down at you adoringly. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Steve.” you say, blushing at his kind words.

“How does this sound? We can go catch a movie at the theater and then go to that diner downtown that you like. Just forget the real world and our responsibilities for a little bit. Then when we come back, we’ll work out some kind of plan for you and I’ll help make sure you aren’t stressing yourself out too much.”

“That sounds great.” you say with a grin. “Thank you, Steve.”

“Anything for you, baby.”

taglist (join here!): @sourapplebaby @harringtown @nxncywheeler @charmed-asylum @heart-eye-harrington @daddystevee @a-magey @lemonypink @igotmadskills @ilovebucketbarnes @simplesammyx @willowrose99 @scooprtroopr @stranger-noah @thegirlthatsfalling @beverlyparkerr @multi-fandom-freak-lol

#steve harrington #stranger things #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington angst #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington fanfiction #steve harrington one shot #stranger things x you #stranger things x reader #stranger things x y/n #stranger things fluff #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things angst #stranger things fanfic #stranger things one shot

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