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#it made me very sad but it was a good conversation i think!
fuckaperioddrama · 4 hours
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Regulus Black Headcanons
Warnings: Angsty!Regulus | Mentions of Anxiety | Insinuation of Social Anxiety | Rough Sex | Soft Dom | Mentions of Oral (Female and Male Receiving) | Fingering
Fem!Reader
Author’s Note: This is probably the most angsty out of all of my headcanons, but it's Regulus so that's pretty fitting for him.
Requested by @slythergirl Hope you like it!
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Theodore Nott Headcanons
Mattheo Riddle Headcanons
Lorenzo Berkshire Headcanons
Blaise Zabini Headcanons
Tom Riddle Headcanons
Draco Malfoy Headcanons
Masterlist
Minors DNI | 18+
Regulus Black | Physique
5’11 - 6’0 
Very slender. 
Similar to Theo in that he does have some muscle, just not much. 
Y’all are probably so tired of me saying this, but he’s a pretty guy!!
His features are so dainty and angelic
Doesn’t look unapproachable, but he doesn’t have a face that welcomes people in either. 
He looks…lifeless. 
Regulus Black | Personality
Regulus is a complex person. 
He doesn’t want to be mean, but he’s just guarded and stuck in his twisted ideology. 
Being a Slytherin doesn’t mean you have to be a mean person, but he was raised to believe that anyone who doesn’t share his status is beneath him. He wasn't raised to be kind.
He was raised to equate kindness and vulnerability with weakness. 
He wants to be nicer, except he feels like he shouldn’t and he doesn’t know how to.
He unintentionally hurts the feelings of those around him and every time he sees the look of hurt on a stranger's face he gets so sad. 
The image of that person's face is stuck in his head for weeks and he starts to dissect every part of that conversation and judge himself for the way he acted. 
“What is wrong with me?”
“Why did I do that?”
“This is why no one likes me.”
He hates it when he overthinks, so he isolates himself a lot. 
When he is in settings where he has to be around people he doesn’t know he doesn’t talk much because he’s afraid of saying the wrong things.
Very much a loner, but he’s grown to be comfortable with that. 
Regulus likes to watch people. | Sounds creepy, but bear with me. 
He likes sitting back and watching two people smile and laugh with each other. 
He likes observing that one guy walks around the halls with a limp and comes up with these over-the-top stories of how he got injured. He imagines it was probably on some crazy adventure. 
He watches in the distance as two people meet and discover they have this undeniable connection. 
He likes to see people live their lives and he fantasizes about one day getting over his anxiety and being able to live his too.
Instead, he just spends most of his time studying.
A very good student and does well in all of his classes. 
He reads a lot as well, mainly really happy stories to contribute to his fantasies about also being happy one day. 
Has tried weed once, but it just made him super paranoid and nervous so he never tried it again. | Some people have bad anxiety attacks when they smoke and I think this is what happened to Regulus. 
Does play Quidditch. He loves it because that’s the only time he can work in a group with people and remain calm while doing it. 
Regulus Black | Casanova
He’s not a virgin, but he doesn’t regularly hook up with people either. 
Will not approach anyone. Sometimes he goes to parties because the boys drag him out to one. 
Later on in the night everyone has dispersed and is doing their own thing while he is left sitting there all by himself.
Women will seek him out | He’s still attractive, just awkward.
Some are turned away from his offstandish personality and some think his nervousness is cute and endearing. 
Will not talk to them a whole bunch out of fear of saying the wrong things, but that’s okay. These women aren’t there to get to know him, they just want someone to hook up with.
The sex is? Hard to explain. It’s not consistent. It just depends on the partner. 
He does whatever they tell him to do and he’s mediocre the first few times. 
After the first time, the girl left obviously not feeling satisfied he felt embarrassed, so he made an effort to figure out the right way to please a woman. 
Probably talked to one of the boys. Only one of them and he did it when they were alone because he didn’t want anyone else to know about his issue. | Idk why, but I see this person being either Tom or Theo. 
He gradually improved and when women started to approach him, he was still shy and quiet, but he was less hesitant. 
He still needs them to vocalize that certain things are okay. Sometimes when you have sex you can kind of go with the motions and people will give consent with body language, but Regulus needs to hear it. 
He prefers using his fingers so that he can have a clear view of the other person's face. 
He’ll start slow, gently rubbing their clit and as he sees their faces contort in pleasure or hears any sounds of satisfaction he’ll speed up and become more confident. 
He’ll start to speed up, a small smirk inching onto his face when inserts his long and slim fingers into their cunt and hears them gasp
With the right girl, he will start to take more control. 
One night he hooks up with someone who is SUPER vocal and doesn’t shy away from telling him how good he’s doing.
What happens next is shocking. 
He’ll grip her either by the hips or waist and start RAILING her 
Full on pumping his stiff and long cock out of them HARD. Rooting himself deep inside her wet slit while his eyelids begin to close and he fully loses himself in the feeling.
In the end, both of them are lying there silently trying to wrap their minds around what happened. 
She didn’t know the quiet nerd was able to do all that and honestly? He didn’t know either.
Regulus Black | Friend
He’s not super close with any of them.
He still values their friendships as they are the only ones he has 
He just has a hard time opening up and he’s always felt like the odd one out. 
All of them, Mattheo, Blaise, Theo, Draco, Enzo, and even Tom have this unhinged side to them that comes out sometimes. 
He has that side, but he’s never unleashed it. 
Sometimes he gets insecure over that and feels like none of them like him that much because he doesn’t join in on the fun. 
He’ll watch them crack jokes, and pick at each other playfully, and he wants to join in, but he’s too afraid to. 
So he sits there watching them have fun and he feels like no one would even notice if he wasn’t there with them. 
Sometimes when Tom is sitting there quietly too he feels less alone, but then Tom speaks and Regulus is reminded that Tom has the confidence to fit in, he’s just more reserved and not shy like him. Then he starts to feel left out again. 
But whenever they all go to hang out and he’s left sitting there as they all start to leave one of them will turn back and look at him. 
“Hey, Reggie! Are you coming?”
And he’s reminded that he’s not as alone as he thinks. 
His friends love him, he just has a hard time believing he’s capable of being loved.
Regulus Black | Boyfriend
Regulus is a good boyfriend. He’s so affectionate and caring. 
Very soft. 
But it’s all a very slow and calculated process for him.
He needs time to figure out what his partner likes and approaches things very cautiously to make sure he’s doing the right things
Once more, he is an observer. 
It takes him a while to open up and get comfortable. At first, he mainly shows his love through Acts of Service
If you have trouble remembering things he’ll leave little reminders for you everywhere. 
Sometimes when you’re in the shower you’ll walk out and see little sticky notes on the inside of the door. 
“Study session with Astoria tonight at 6. I’ll pick you up afterwards.”
“Make sure to ask McGonagall for extra credit work.”
“Remember to stop by Binn’s class before the library to drop off your paper.”
He’ll help you organize your task so that you don’t get overwhelmed. 
He creates a list of everything you have to do in order of importance and then creates a schedule. 
He makes sure to include snack breaks and rest periods for you. 
If you’re not able to get everything done he’ll always comfort you
Reminding you that it’s okay and that you don’t need to get everything done. You still did a good job. 
Regulus struggles with his anxiety and because of that, he’s able to pick up on certain nervous tells of other people, but especially with you. 
Does your leg bounce, do you start to itch, or play with your necklace?
Whatever it is Regulus notices right away and he always knows the best way to comfort you. 
Maybe you’re out somewhere and you’re having one of those moments where it is not your day. You’re feeling overwhelmed and he leans over. The room quiets as you listen to his smooth and comforting voice.
“Do you see that painting over there? It was painted by Jean-Marc Nattier. He was famous for creating portraits of beautiful women. He was often...”
And as he talks to you he gently intertwines your fingers, running his thumb slowly over the top of your hand. His attentiveness to your needs calms you down, as well as his Physical Touch.
Regulus’s way of touching you is ingrained in him. He does it without even realizing he is. 
When you’re sitting side by side he rests his hand on your knee, 
When you’re on his lap he gently massages your thigh. 
He’ll also grab your hand and almost lace your fingers together. His touch will stop halfway down as he starts to slowly run his fingers up and down yours. 
He likes the motion of it as it puts his mind at ease. Touching you grounds him and it makes him feel safe so it’s something he’s constantly doing. 
Then there are his intentional touches.
Before class, he’ll always pull you aside somewhere hidden where people can’t see. He gently grabs your cheeks and lowers his head. 
He kisses your lips and then rests his forehead against yours as he whispers.
“I’ll miss you.”
“Regulus, I’ll see you in an hour…”
“T’s too long.”
In addition to this, he also is the kinda guy that always hugs you from behind so he can feel your body against his.
He likes long, lingering touches. Whenever he hugs you it lasts forever and he takes his time when he pulls apart from you. 
Sometimes when you’re both alone and you’re focused on something else he’ll lean forward and place gentle kisses along your neck. 
He needs you to give him affection now and then and that’s how he initiates it. 
He requires more when you guys are having your Quality Time
Regulus feels like he’s finally living when he’s with you. 
You bring out his more adventurous side and make him want to get out and do things 
Dates once a week and it’s always something new 
A new restaurant, museum, or shop.
He wants you to be there for every new discovery because he likes to envision you in his future and remember you in his past.
As previously mentioned, you ground him, so he prefers you to be around 
Especially when he’s doing something he’s not comfortable with. 
“You’re going to do great, Regulus. They’re going to love you.”
“You’ll be there right?”
“Always.”
He likes to spend time mindlessly talking to you. 
Silly thoughts and deep ones. 
Philosophies and conspiracies. 
The life you want to live and the life you used to live. 
Regulus takes these conversations very seriously and he makes note of every single thing you say. 
If you want to travel, want to write, or want to experience something different he will find a way to either encourage you or make it happen for you.
There’s always a special meaning behind the things he gives you and he loves to express the meaning each time.
 Gift Giving and Words of Affirmation 
Regulus puts a lot of thought into his gifts and what you would like. 
If you want books he’ll pay attention to the genres you like, the tropes you enjoy the most, and even if you have a preference for hard cover or soft cover. 
He’ll buy the books and read them first just to make sure you’ll like them, even if you two have different tastes in genres. 
While he’s reading it he’ll keep a separate piece of paper and make note of the pages where he saw something that reminded him of you. 
If after reading it he decides to give it to you he’ll go back and bookmark little notes on those pages. 
“The way he describes beauty is the way I describe you.”
“This is the type of life I hope we share one day.”
“If I didn’t lose my train of thought every time I looked at you these are the things I would say.”
He likes to take pictures of every journey you embark on together and on your anniversary each year he’ll present them in a scrapbook to you that always has a letter on the first page. In the letter he describes how each year he falls deeper and deeper in love with you and he thanks you for being a constant figure in his life.
He likes to buy you tickets to see that artist you’ve never seen live or he’ll book a flight to take you to that country you told him you wanted to visit one day. 
He watches as your face sparkles with amazement and he smiles. 
“You deserve every ounce of happiness and I promise to dedicate my life to giving it to you.”
He voluntarily gives you everything, including full access to his heart and soul
As well as his body.
Regulus Black | Committed Lover
Regulus is very sweet in bed 
Very disrespectfully sweet
SOFT DOM | My favorite trait 
He’s so rough and yet so tender at the same time.
His hips slap against you so intensely that you wake up with bruises the next day.
He listens to you whimper while he places his hands on your waist, occasionally slowing down to let you relax as he starts to caress your sides 
“You’re doing so good, love.”
“Can I keep going? Can you take more?”
“That’s my girl.”
Regulus enjoys receiving 
When you two are intimate he spends all of his time focusing on you and your pleasure 
When you’re on your knees mouth full with his cock is the only time he’ll ever sit back and focus on himself
His mind quiets and he feels his body jolt each time you glide your tongue down his shaft.
His mouth hangs open as his moans get louder and louder as you keep going. 
And he’s so appreciative 
To experience you being so focused on his needs. Sucking him so good he feels like he’s about to pass out. 
Once he regains his composure he wastes no time in shifting the focus back on you. 
Kissing every sweet spot, eating you out, feeling your velvet folds underneath his fingertips as he circles your clit until your legs shake 
He listens to your moans and cries of pleasure and it makes him never want to stop. 
He wants to freeze time just so he can spend forever watching you as you lose yourself in his touch 
You inspire his every desire.
And you are the reason he finally feels alive.
----
Regulus brings out my soft side.
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mxtxfanatic · 2 days
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sorry if you're done talking about it and don't want to discuss it anymore, but for me the 'trolley problem' post was just a sad note about how xie lian's attempts to stop "the trolley" (who always has a name and we very well know about it) end up in a disaster. not because xie lian did it, but because the trolley is actually an unstoppable force with malicious intent and no one else gives a fuck or doesn't have resources to help
but xie lian also shows us that even if things end up like that, it's worth trying. it's worth it, because you might not save everyone, but might save a child. a village. a little boy. a little girl. but if you don't do anything, you'll never know
I’m gonna go ahead and link this addition to my original commentary plus this response that I had in the notes to someone else with a similar reading of that post:
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All I can say is that some of y’all are nicer readers than I, because I took that post to mean exactly what op said. If op came back and clarified something, I didn’t see it; I’m only talking about the original post and how inappropriate it is to 1) victim-blame a victim of the events in question for apparently having the audacity to not passively accept events he could influence for the better and 2) say this as a “joke” (because the blasé tone, minimalization of the actual events, overexaggeration of the victim’s responsibility for how said events turned out, and the flat-out avoidance to name what was the actual cause of everything that happens to make it into a meme format was fully meant to be taken as a “joke”).
The issue both with the trolley problem and the likening of it to the events of tgcf is that neither the trolley nor anything Xie Lian experienced are “unstoppable forces.” The trolley is not a natural disaster or the act of an omnipotent god: it is just a trolley. And not only is it just a trolley, it is a trolley that was made, owned, driven, and maintained by people. Everything that goes into a scenario where a trolley is on track to run over a crowd of people (tied to the tracks, another thing that is decidedly not a natural occurrence), is one that is 100% manufactured by multiple different people.
Likewise, while the Yong’an drought was a natural disaster, everything that led to the fall of Xianle was 100% the machinations of multiple different parties, from the rich nobility of both Xianle and Yong’an hoarding their wealth, the corrupt officials who stole aid, the corrupt religious officials who blocked Xie Lian’s followers from praying to him, Guoshi and the king for keeping all of this from Xie Lian, and to the other heavenly officials who withheld help with the intent to prey on the victims of the disaster. Jun Wu’s contribution could honestly be considered the least in this conversation, merely serving as the wind fanning the flames of a fire that had already started. None of that was a coincidence nor the fault of anything Xie Lian did or attempted to do.
Yes a big part of tgcf is recognizing that Xie Lian’s steadfastness to helping should be a personal goal, but another big message that mxtx pushes in all her works is that 99% of all societal problems can be tracked down to a few select individuals choosing to do evil because they don’t think that their greed, selfishness, insecurities, fears, or entitlements are a bad thing while most everyone else either looks the other way because “it’s not my problem,” tries to benefit because “why let opportunity go to waste?” or actively participate because mob mentality. Mocking good people for doing good under these circumstances will never be funny, sympathetic, or relatable to me.
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el-im · 5 months
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hey honestly sorry for reading in bad faith a post that was personal. you dont deserve to be treated badly and i hope you know its okay to not always be the bigger person
hey, thank you! i was kind of surprised/confused, not offended, but appreciate you reaching out again. i think there's got to be a middle ground here between nonengagement/meanness. i would like to believe that i could feasibly respond in kind to people, but think, also, my refusal and/or inability to do that in some way illustrates my own decency. mostly, i want to be kind, and am working at that. it'd be nice if that was reciprocated but this seems to be my year for discovering that i can't lead other people by example, and can't change their behavior just in my heartbreak over it. such is life! such is life! maybe all that kindness will come in time.
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pepprs · 11 months
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prefacing this by saying im fine and its whatever and im mostly numb to it. but it kinda fucking sucks that being gaslit about my own sexuality leads to… doubting my own sexuality lol!
#purrs#just went to my first ever lavender graduation ceremony and had a convo w my dad after that touched on the EXACT horrors lol like i need to#learn to not bring this shit up around my parents bc they’re just gonna say the same things. and also it doesn’t matter bc idc about labels#and (to quote ricky) it’s a conversation not a constant. but like fucking hell. just bc ive never ‘’’’’’been with anybody’’’’’’ doesn’t#mean that i can’t know im not straight. the HORRIFIC psychic damage that did to me 5 years ago this month. the way i can’t think about#sexuality or being part of the lgbtq community since and like before then when that happened i thought i was a lesbian and was gonna try to#get involved with the school lgbtq student union . like it’s so ficking stupid and sad. and i can’t trust myself anymore i can’t tell if#anything ive ever felt for anyone is actually real bc according to my (straight and biphobic) parents ‘crushes don’t count’ and i haven’t#even had a crush in months anyway and yeah ive never ‘been with’ anybody. but like god damn. you DO NOT get to tell me i have to call myself#questioning. yeah im questioning but only i can call it that and only if i want to. i get to know me. i get to call me what i am. which also#means i get to work through the years of psychic damage this thread of conversation coming from my own parents has done to me#but i own that. i want to own that. ive had the feelings i have had. maybe they were wrong and misplaced and maybe there are other ways to#interpret them like me jus t having projection issues and whatever. but they were real to me and are real to me and shape how i show up#every single day. i get to know myself. i get to call myself what i am. even though you’re my parents you don’t get to tell me that. and you#should be sorry for how fucked in the head this has made me and how cut off i have become from other people who have felt what i have felt#and from the parts of myself that felt and hurt and loved. like lolllll. i was in a good mood and then that happened and now my heart hurts.#delete later#like i don’t talk abt this shit anymore for a reason 🤪✌️ i am not involved in lgbtq groups or communities online or offline for a reason 🤪✌️#and it’s yet another manifestation of impostor syndrome too like. ppl wonder why im like this…. there is a very good reason 💖
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pennyserenade · 1 year
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i read that autobiography cary grant did for himself in 1963, and this part has haunted me since i read it three or so days ago:
I dreaded the bustle of packing backstage that last night, as I have at the finish of every show or film I’ve been associated with ever since. I am always content to stay doing what I’m doing wherever I’m doing it; only circumstances seem to propel me on. I seldom leave anyone or anyplace of my own conscious volition. When the meal or party or association is over, and the people or person close to me are no longer there, I seem unwishing to move; without urge to change the situation, even though it could be for the better. Perhaps death is like that. Perhaps it is better on the other side of death; but I’m in no hurry to get there to prove it.
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luvf4ngz · 1 month
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HOT LOVE ON THE WING - jason todd.
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Descripton: You’re not upset about your most recent breakup; you’re just upset you have no one to fuck anymore. Good thing your Shakespeare loving best friend, Jason, has a solution to that.
Contents: This Bad Boy Is PACKED With Shakespeare References, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Cheating (Not By Jason Or Reader), You And Jason Are Absolute Fucking DORKS, Good Friend Jason Todd, Best Friend Jason Todd, Self-Indulgent, Cunnilingus, Oral Sex (Female Receiving), Female Reader, HEAVY Banter, Hair-pulling, Vaginal Fingering, Squirting, Overstimulation :), Pet Names, Praise Kink, Dacryphilia, Soft Jason Todd, Dom Jason Todd, Missionary Position, Doggy Style, Cowgirl Position, Nipple Play, Spanking, Rough Sex, Dumbification, Fucked Stupid, Unrealistic Sex, Unprotected Sex, Multiple Orgasms, Spit/Drool, Goofy Giggly Sex, But Also Hard and Fast Sex, Jason Destroys Your Spiderman Panties :(
Word Count: 3131
Author's Note: If it wasn't obvious from the tags this is a repost from my AO3 hehe. This is genuinely my favorite fic I've ever written, I hope you enjoy it as much as I do :) <3
“It’s okay, pretty girl. You can take it, can’t you? You made a big show of defying me earlier, put your money where your mouth is - right?”
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You threw open the door to his dorm, instantly honing in on his bed and diving into the soft plush. Jason is sitting at his desk, looking up at you from his book with a roll of his eyes at your dramatic entrance. 
“Well, hello to you too.” His tone is dripping with sarcasm, but his smile betrays his facade. “It’s nice to see you again, stranger. How long has it been, hm?” He teases, his words alluding to the fact that you’ve been spending less time with him lately in favor of being with your “new boy toy” - as he put it.
You let out a hum into the comforter before moving to your side to properly look at him. “Well I think you’ll be very happy to hear that I’m all yours again, Todd, so there’s no need to be jealous.” You cheekily reply. 
“What’s that supposed to mean?” His eyebrows knit together in confusion. You thought it made him look adorable.
“I broke up with my ‘boy toy’, as you so politely called him.” You giggled out, using your fingers as quotation marks for emphasis. 
“What!? What happened?” Jason’s eyes widened at the news you so casually dropped.
“Apparently he’s been cheating on me for some time. My friend showed me some pictures of him shoving his tongue down some girl’s throat at a party so I broke it off with him this morning. Anyways, what’s been going on in Jay-Land?” You grin widely as you gaze at him from the bed.
Your attempt at changing the topic of conversation went unsuccessful. 
Jason sat up from his spot, setting his book down before hurriedly making his way over to you, settling down beside you on the bed.
“Are you okay?”
“Don’t I seem okay to you? I’m just fine, dude.” You tried to reassure him, your voice unwavering and relaxed as your eyes followed him.
“I mean, I guess; but I thought you really liked him.” 
“It seems like you want me to be sad over this. What do you want me to say? ‘Tears seven times salt burn the sense and virtue from mine eyes!’” You gasp out the line dramatically, bringing a hand to cover your heart and the other to wipe non-existent tears from your face, before bursting out into giggles. 
“Don’t you go quoting Shakespeare at me! That’s my role in this friendship!” Jason playfully nudges your shoulder as a wide grin breaks out on his own face.
“The Jason doth protest too much, methinks.” You do your best to put on a snooty tone, but your laughter prevents it. 
“Oh, shut up.” 
Another round of cackles start up between the two of you, and you both relish in the comfortable silence that falls after. 
“You know,” You start, breaking the silence and making Jason’s head turn towards you. “There is one thing I’m sad about.”
“What?”
“His dick game was mad good.” You say with an extravagant sigh. “I’m gonna miss it.” You fake a few sniffles.
“Aw, come on now. There’s other dick out there.” 
“Nah, it’s too much work. I’ll just have to survive without it for now. ‘But I have that within which passeth show; these but the trappings and the suits of woe.’”
“I can’t believe he’s got you so cock-drunk that you’re quoting Hamlet.” Jason tsks out in false disapproval. “He’s not good enough to be depressed for.”
“He’s not, but the sex definitely was.” 
“It couldn’t have been that good.”
“It was.”
“Not better than what I could do though.”
“Ehhhhhh…” You squinch your face together in overplayed disbelief, causing him to fix you with a sharp glare and a hurt gasp. 
“Is that a challenge?” He smirked, his eyes narrowing in competitiveness. 
“I know it not ‘seems’.” 
“You cheeky motherfucker.” Jason smiles out before grabbing your waist and throwing you further up the bed. It causes you to let out a startled yelp as Jason moved to hover over your body.
“Oh? You gonna prove it to me, Todd? You must be overcompensating for something if you get this riled up over such a small comment. You know, if you wanted to fuck me - you could have just asked.”
“Funny, I was about to say the exact same thing.” He leans in to bite your neck, making your body jolt against his.
“Hey! Play nice, Todd.” You scold, slapping his shoulder before wrapping your arms around his neck.
“I’m ever so sorry, madam.” He fake pouts before attacking your face with kisses. 
“Stop!” You squeal out, giggles erupting uncontrollably from the ticklish sensation. You move your hands to his chest, pushing him away from you. “Are you ever gonna get on with it, or are you just gonna keep messing around?”
“That’s a fair thought: to lie between maids’ legs.” 
“Ugh, it doesn’t sound as good when you do it.” 
“Excuse you? I’m a Shakespeare quoting champ!” 
“You’re awfully defensive today, Todd.” You note with a grin. 
“Keep talking, princess, see what happens.” He jokingly warns. 
He pulls back from you to pull his shirt over his head, before going to tug at his pants. You follow after him, sitting up to discard your own clothing. Once you both are left in your underwear, Jason pushes you flat against the bed again. 
“Spiderman panties. Cute.” 
“Shut up. It’s not like I planned for this to happen.” You grumbled out at his observation. You forgot about them and your cheeks burned with embarrassment.
“Mhm, sure, sweetheart.”
Jason starts planting sloppy kisses on your skin, trailing his way down your body until he’s reached your waistband. He shuffles down the bed and lies down between your legs, leaning in to snatch the fabric of your underwear between his teeth and ripping it off your legs. 
“Jay! I liked that pair!”
“My bad, princess, I’ll be sure to buy you some new ones.”
“Better still be spiderman.”
“I’m more Team Cap.” He disserts before gripping your thighs and dragging your core closer to his face; the back of your calves rest on his shoulders. 
His eyes drag down your glistening pussy before he lets out a loud wolf whistle at the sight.
“Ew, Todd!” You laugh, trying to kick him for the action but the hold he has on you is too tight to allow movement. 
“What? I’m just appreciating the view.”
He dips his head down, tongue flicking at your hooded clit before he wraps his lips and around the bud and sucks. He feels your thighs tighten around his head as your own tilts up to let out a loud moan. He replaces his tongue with his fingers, expertly working the nub in circles as he peers up at you. 
Your head is turned to the side, eyes clenched and lips spilling shaky whines. 
‘A damn nice sight’, if he did say so himself.
He continues to stimulate your clit with his thumb, pressing his tongue to your dripping hole to lap up your arousal. 
“Fuck, Jason! You really know how to put the money where your mouth is,” You mumble into the sheets, hips bucking up every once in a while from the pleasure. 
Jason grips you tighter, preventing you from moving. He briefly looks up to note “I think you’ll find I know how to use my mouth quite well”, before moving to continue eating you out.
His actions are faster, more feverous. His tongue runs up and down your sex, your slick coating his taste buds. He savors it - lets out a deep hum that reverberates through your pussy and up your spine, sending shivers through your body. He sucks and slurps at you, so passionate that you swear you can feel your soul escaping through your cunt. The wet smacks do nothing but turn you on more, your thighs pressing closer to his head and acting as earmuffs. 
Your hands move from their place bunched in his sheets to his hair, tanging the dark locks between your fingers and instinctively tugging. It causes a low groan to tear from his throat, the bass and depth of it fueling the uncontrollable hot ache in your stomach. That only makes you want to do it again. The second tug makes a sound that’s akin to a growl, before Jason pauses his movements to stare up at you.
“Careful, princess. Don’t bite off more than you can chew.” 
It’s a sight to behold. Jason: heaving, eyes blown, his face shiny from your smeared slick. His mouth is open, panting - his gaze refusing to leave contact with yours. There’s mischief glimmering in the depth of his eyes. 
You don’t reply - only smirk, and yank his head closer to your sex again. 
“Oh, you’ve done it now.” 
His hand moves from your clit to your dripping hole, two fingers pushing their way inside you. His lips reattach to your clit as he starts to move his fingers - fast and rough and leaving you no time to adjust to his intrusion. 
“J-Jesus fuck!” He can feel your thighs twitching, can feel your fingers gripping onto his hair hard in response, and it only spurs him on more. 
His palm smacks against your cunt with each hit, splattering your slick. His fingers move at an unfathomable speed, pads searching for that one spot inside you that will make you see white. 
You’re whimpering and whining above him, senses overwhelmed at Jason’s rough ministrations. It’s too much: the pressure building inside you. It feels like you’re on the edge, senses ready to fall into a never-ending pit of endorphins and fear and exhilaration. There are fireworks inside you, lit and ready to burst and fry all of your sensibilities. 
Finally, it happens - what Jason’s been waiting for. With a slightly tilted angle of his hand and a curl of his fingers, he finds it. He knows because you suddenly tense up; because you let out the most angelic, strung-out moan he’s ever heard; because your walls clamp down on his fingers and a jet of tangy, sweet liquid hits his awaiting tongue. 
God he wishes he could watch you cum over and over and over. He’s gonna think back to this moment when he’s fucking his fist in the future - that’s for sure. The view of you - back arched, eyes teary. The sensation of you - warm and wet and tight against his digits. The sound of you - desperate and high pitched and wailing out his name. He wants it all burned into his brain.
“Jason, Jason!” Yeah, that’s the sound of heaven alright. “Jay! Stop! I came- I can’t!”
Hm?
Oh. He hasn’t stopped pumping his fingers inside you. Oh, well.
“It’s okay, pretty girl. You can take it, can’t you? You made a big show of defying me earlier, put your money where your mouth is - right?”
God, you’re shaking. You look like a leaf shivering in the wind, or a cat left out in the rain. Your eyes are glossy and teary and fuck. You look so beautiful falling apart for him. 
Your brain is in shambles, screaming and begging for a reprieve. It’s dizzying, the assault of your sensations. All you can hear, think, feel is Jason.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck, please!”
“Come on, princess. Just let go. Just one more for me, yeah?”
You can’t tell if the second orgasm hits you like a train or slowly drowns you in its weight. Maybe a mix of both - a crashing of a tsunami that simultaneously relieves your ache and steals your breath. 
You’re sobbing, trembling, gasping for breath and trying to regain feeling from the clouds that seem to have replaced your nerves. 
“You did so well.” Jason cooes. He’s sitting up, suckling your juices from his fingers like you were a decadent 5-star meal.
He moves to lay down beside you, pulling your body to curl into his, back to peppering your cheeks with chaste, affectionate kisses. 
“Fuck, Jason.” You heave out, still slightly out of it. 
“Was that okay? Did I get carried away?” He questions softly, concern lacing the green in his eyes. 
“Yeah, no, that was great.” You quickly reassure him. “I just- wow. I need a moment.” 
He chuckles quietly before holding you close to his body again. “So? Did I exceed your expectations?”
“Don’t get cocky. Hubris was the downfall of Macbeth.” You shuffle closer to him. “Speaking of cocky, is that a dagger - or are you just happy to see me?”
“I’m always happy to see you princess,” Jason croons. “but I am extremely rock hard right now, too.”
Your hands drift down his body, sensually tracing every muscle from his chest to his pelvis, before tugging off his boxers.
You swing your body on top of his, straddling his waist as you begin pumping his cock. 
“Well then” You start, positioning yourself on top of his awaiting member, “O’ happy dagger, this is thy sheath…”
You start to sink down on him as you finish the quote, your words trailing off into a wanton moan. 
“I’d yell at you for saying something so stupid if you weren’t fucking squeezing my cock right now.” Jason manages to huff out. His teeth are gritted, eyes shut as he tries not to cum at the sensation of you wrapped warm and tight around him. 
His large hands settle on your waist as yours plant themselves on his chest for support. 
“You have to admit, it’s clever wordplay.” You mewl, mind fuzzy from the sensation of his dick stretching you out. 
Tingles shoot up your body as the pain dissolves into a delicious fullness. You crave friction, your very core feels like it's aching for it. In fact, you think you’ll go insane if you don’t start moving right now. 
You carefully lift your hips up, before dropping back down again, repeating the motion over and over until you’ve built up a somewhat regular rhythm. 
Moans ceaselessly flow from your lips, interspersed with mumbled swears and curses.
Your head is tipped forward, your hair falling into your face. Jason’s hand comes up to brush it back behind your ear, before gently cupping your cheek.
“You feel so good baby, fuck.” He grunts.
His other hand comes up to undo your bra, releasing your tits to him. Both palms move to cup them, kneading at the soft flesh before working your perked nipples with his fingers. 
You still your movements with a whine, too confounded by the assault of stimulations you were feeling. That doesn’t mean that you’re not still desperate and yearning, though. Your thighs do their best to rub against each other, trying to chase friction despite your inaction. 
It’s only as you rest that you feel how sore your legs have become, enough that you let out a pitiful mewl. 
“Is my pretty baby tired?” Jason muses, while he’s still pinching and rolling your sensitive buds. 
“Mhm,” You moan out in reply. 
He quickly rolls the both of you over, laying you down onto your back again before flipping you onto your stomach. 
You quickly shuffle onto your knees, arching back against him in wait. 
“Good girl,” He laughs out. His palms rub against your cheeks, squeezing the flesh there before pulling back and giving it a slap. 
It earns him a broken moan from your throat, and the view of your ass shaking in desperation.
It only makes him laugh again. “Have some patience, naughty girl.”
He spanks you again, and you keen so high-pitched and pretty that he can only relent to your demands. 
Jason grips his cock and guides it to your wet folds, sliding it up and down before finally pushing in. You welcome him easily, pussy molding perfectly to his thick cock. 
A hand settles on your waist while the other tangles into your hair. He yanks your head back as he starts fucking you hard and fast. 
His hips smack hard against your ass with each thrust, slowly turning the skin there sore and heated. His cock is bullying its way in and out of you, the tip knocking against your sweet spot with a force that repeatedly knocks the breath and thoughts out of you. 
Your eyes are rolled back, brain melted, as drool drips from your lips. 
Chants of “fuck” and “Jay” are the only sounds your mouth remembers how to make now. 
“Just keep saying my name like that, sweetheart.” Jason pants out. 
He can’t believe how good you feel around him. You’re so warm and wet that his cock glides in and out so easy, making it effortless for him to abuse your poor cunt. 
The hand in your hair guides you up to him, back pressed against his sweaty chest as he tilts your head and leans in for a kiss. 
It’s messy with your spit and drool, both your movements uncoordinated and sloppy. 
He fucks up into you all the while, gravity allowing him to hit harder and deeper inside you.
He can feel that you’re close again - your body is twitching against him, your cunt beginning to spasm. 
The hand on your waist reaches to rub quick and hard circles against your clit, and you’re gone.
Your whole body shudders as you soak his cock, before going limp is his hold. It’s an intense buzzing sensation that overtakes you, settling deep in your veins until you’re trapped in a pleasing static. Your head is submerged in sticky syrup that makes it hard to think, so you just indulge in the calming weight of it. 
Jason pulls out and gently maneuvers your dazed body back to the bed, hand working himself to completion before finishing on your stomach - his warm cum splattering on the skin as he lets out a husky grunt.
He stays there, catching his breath for a few moments before he disappears to the bathroom while you come down from your high, washing his hands and grabbing a damp towel to bring back to you. 
He wipes you clean before poking your cheek until your gaze refocuses on him.
“How was it?” He cheekily smirks. 
“I certainly died a lovely death in thy lap,” You chuckle.
“If you can still quote Shakespeare I didn’t fuck you dumb enough.” Jason frowns.
“Awh, cheer up, you big baby.” You reach out to pat his head endearingly, “I change my mind; your dick game is definitely better.”
“YES!” Jason fist-pumps like he just scored a touch-down and you smile at how stupid he looks. “Okay, now you go pee.” He shoos you away. “I’ll change the sheets and we can watch reruns of Gossip Girl again.”
“I would not wish any companion in the world but you.” You fake tear-up, wiping your eyes before giggling the whole way to the bathroom. 
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Thank you so much for reading! A comment or reblog is much appreciated. Have a great day <3
- sumi ☆ミ
ミ☆ masterlist
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royalarchivist · 15 days
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Phil briefly talks about QSMP, the admin situation, Quackity, the new team, and the harassment both Quackity and the admins have been receiving.
Please listen to the clip and read the transcript in its entirety. Keep in mind that things can easily be taken out of context (even this clip, though I did try to include everything he said).
If you'd like to see the full unedited conversation, Phil started talking about last week's interactions with YD and Bad ~1h 57m into today's VOD, which led into this conversation about QSMP.
[ Complete Transcript ↓ ]
Phil: Yeah, she's great. Another- another reason why QSMP is just like... fuckin' incredible. That was like, not even ever going to happen without QSMP. Like, obviously it's had its problems, it's go– it's had its problems. Those problems are being rectified. All the people that were wrong'uns have been fired [Laughs] And Quackity's put a new team together. So like, I'm so happy that I'm like– that Q is doing everything he can right now to make it like, right.
But I am still just sad that Chayanne and Tallulah are just asleep, that is just making me real sad. So I've been like, logging on whenever I can to just like, hang out and stuff and just, you know, be around. But I am- I am just sad boy now. [Laughs] I've like– throwing all those penguins into the- the Spawn area was like, my limit. And the like, laughing with YD and Bad kind of cheered me up a bit.
But yeah, I'm sure most of you can agree. It's like, once- once you've been making content on a server a certain way, it's- it's been like, 6 - 8 months of like, the same like type of content I've been making on that server. It's been very lore-heavy, it's been very Egg hanging out with the Eggs and just chilling. Like, not even like doing anything crazy. We would just hang out. But yeah, I'm sure everyone's in the same boat. Like, we all just like, miss that, you know?
So... just gotta wait around. Just gotta wait. Wait for things to get better. Trust in Big Q.
But yeah, moments- moments like the other day, Chat, where me, Bad, and YD were just hanging out just like kind of... you know, it just kind of like... What's the word I'm looking for? Like, drills home how important the QSMP is and can be for connecting people. Not just now, but in the future. And like, that- I feel like that is something that's definitely worth protecting, or something that's worth like, seeing happen in the future with other people. Not even thinking about like, if I'm gonna be interacting with anyone like, thinking about like other people interacting with other people in the future. It's fucking- It's so cool.
Like, imagine seeing like, brand new streamers that you might've not have heard of interacting with people that you know right now. Not necessarily me or people that I know, but like– like, the connections that we've all made.
Dude, Me and Kristin went to fuckin' Switzer-France to hang out with these people! [Laughs] Cellbit and Lore traveled from fucking Brazil to Switzer-France to hang out! The- these connections are like, mental. Just never would have happened without the server, and that's definitely something worth protecting. And like, ensuring it is done the correct way in the future.
That means a lot to us Chat, it does– [Briefly responds to Chat] It means a lot to us and like, obviously the admins being well-taken care of is like, at the fore-front.
And Quackity speaks very highly of this new team. He's like- he's chatted to us like, in calls and stuff. He's been keeping us up to date on everything that's been going on behind the scenes, everything that he can tell us anyways. And like, he is very happy with this new team. He pretty much said that they are like, very passionate about the project, and we can like, trust that he trusts them to do a very good job. So...
Yeah, I'm excited but like, we just have to kind of like, wait. Like, there's a lot being changed around, there's a lot of plans. But the good thing to know is that the people that caused harm have been removed. And now the people that are like, in charge are like, very passionate about the project and just want to see everyone happy and succeed and be taken care of. But these things take time. So we just have to hang about, we have to wait.
[Responding to someone asking about what happened with QSMP and the Admin situation] I'm not going to go into too much detail, you can find out exactly what has gone on, and it's not as simple as black and white. It's- there's a lot of gray areas in there, and it's like very complicated, so you can go look it up yourself, but ultimately, all you need to know is that the initial admin team, the like, head people at the top that Quackity put in charge like ages ago when the server first started were making decisions that were like, not good for the health and also the well-being of the actors, and like, admins and like, the staff. So like, some staff were fine, other staff had a shit fucking time, and it was unfair and terrible and went unnoticed for a while, and then it all came out and Quackity's been like, fixing it since.
Most recently, he stepped down from the team because of like, how serious shit was getting. Like, people online have been fucking awful. And it's very dangerous at the minute for like the ex- like, members of the team, and also him. It's like- it's terrible.
So it's very heated, very– it's– again— and it's not as simple as just like "This- this is– this is right, this is wrong." It's like- it's very- there's a lot of muddled areas, and it's not as easy as just saying "This is exactly what happened." I'm summarizing. I'm literally just summarizing. But all you need to know right now, the latest update is that the team that are in charge are very passionate about the projects and are like, much, much better and will take care of the new people and the admins and all the actors and stuff a lot better than the last fucking team because the initial problem was that Quackity kind of like, took a bit more of a step back and he wasn't like, overseeing every single thing that was going on behind the scenes, but now he's had to- he's had to take a step back, he's been forced to take a step back, but he's left it in the hands of a team that he truly trusts this time. Like, he's actually fully-vetted.
So HOPEFULLY– again: there's more things that need to be done behind the scenes, and I'm not an official spokesperson, I'm just a person playing on the fucking server that my friend has made, and I'm very happy to support him, and I trust that he will do and continue to do the right thing.
But yeah. Not as simple as just [Snaps fingers] "This is this." It's like– there's so much fucking like, middle ground and shit that's gone on. And that's all I'm gonna say on it! 'Cuz otherwise it's just gonna go on and on and on, and people are gonna be like, "What do you know?" and be like "I don't know shit!" And the stuff that I do know, I probably can't talk about right now. There's like, certain things that like, can't be said, for legal reasons and stuff.
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ineffableigh · 5 months
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Wait what the hell is Aziraphale mouthing here. Lip-readers sound off!!
This is RIGHT before "The Metatron! I don't think he's as bad a fellow - well I think I might have misjudged him."
His line was: "I, um... [mouthing something]" THEN the above line.
This can't be nothing. Can it? "We need to get out"??? Not sure. EDIT: I agree with @maximumpenguinpuppy here, I think he's saying
"WE NEED HELP."
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Further deep dive on the most painful conversation I've ever seen:
Azi makes the most INTENSE EYE CONTACT I'VE EVER SEEN during "I think I might have misjudged him."
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"PLEASE HEAR WHAT I AM SAYING TO YOU RIGHT NOW."
After a few intercuts with the flashbacks we get to the really painful bit.
"He said that I could appoint you... to be an angel." His voice is so strained and high pitched even for him, here.
"Like the old times, only even NICER!"
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The super nice old times where you couldn't be together at all, eh?
Crowley starts his confession and we get the "What the blazes is he doing?" face as he starts to realize Crowley is NOT picking up on any of this. Azi's breathing heavily here, revealing how very stressed the fuck out he is.
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After this point is when things get really hard to interpret. Aziraphale sounds so genuine about "Come with me!" and "We can make a difference, I'll run it and you'll be my second in command." It feels like Crowley starting his very real confession broke through the charade of 'The Metatron knows something and we're in fucking danger'.
He blathers about Angels and Doing Good before breaking again, letting the "I need you!" slip. We get this HALF A SECOND look of the most profound sadness right before the "I don't think you understand what I'm offering you."
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"You idiot. We could have been us."
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Azi looks like he can't believe just how badly this went. This is right before he looks away.
OH NO NOW I'VE SEEN CROWLEY'S FACE RIGHT WHEN HE STARTS TO GO OVER FOR THE KISS AH MY FEELS
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Azi is not hiding his emotions well, right before the grab:
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Then of course we get the I Forgive You, which sounds like his most bitter one yet. A flash of anger and resentment, frustration, immediately followed by remorse and grief.
Having seen all that, my best guess now is:
Metatron made the (barely) veiled De Facto Partnership threats, implying he knows about the body swap and, implicitly, threatening Crowley with Holy Water, at least to some extent.
Aziraphale tries his damnedest to communicate to Crowley that Something is Fucking Wrong and they Have to Go to Heaven to Fix It.
Crowley, having been primed by the various chats with Nina and then the 2v1 chat with Nina and Maggie RIGHT before this, clearly timed by the Metatron, fully misses all of this and takes it all at face value.
Crowley starts to give his confession and Aziraphale realizes what he's trying to say, tries to adjust his Heaven Pitch to hinge on staying together as a team to fix things."
"You cannot leave this bookshop." "Nothing lasts forever." Azi has chosen the worst way to make another attempt at saying he has no choice but to leave the bookshop. I don't think this is about the Second Coming, given his reaction to the info later.
Everything deteriorates from there as Aziraphale tries again to imply something is Fucking Wrong by going back to the "Angels! Doing good!" shtick, but it's too late. It's always too late.
"I don't think you understand what I'm offering you." He doesn't but Azi is also communicating it very badly, likely because the Metatron is indeed watching.
Crowley thinks this is all real so he gives his No Nightingales line, etc etc. Aziraphale can tell there's no fixing this, gives up.
Crowley swoops in with The Kiss as a last ditch effort to get Azi to listen. Azi WAS listening, but cannot respond other than in anger and frustration that Crowley, in his view, refuses to listen to him again, has called him an idiot again. This happens multiple times throughout the show so there's history to fuel that assumption.
This is the precise outcome the Metatron was vying for, to split them up and emotionally/psychologically weaken them, to ensure there was no chance of a united front as there was for Armageddidn't.
My heart hurts, ow.
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seraphmeraph · 7 months
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Decided to change it up a bit
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Headcanons - Lin Kuei brothers
MK1 NSFW headcanons of Tomas Vrbada, Kuai Liang, and Bi Han.
TW: oral sex, p in v, praise kink, gn but might be a hint of afab, rough sex, degrading.
A/N: feel free to send requests cause I can't think. I didn't proof read again so sorry about that
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Tomas Vrbada • Smoke
Needs constant reassurance when you guys get intimate.
You can't stay quiet around this man because he's gonna start overthinking and believe that he's not pleasuring you enough.
"Am I doing good, my princess?" Tomas asks, his voice laced with worry, his head buried between your thighs, lapping away at your heat. If you don't praise him, he'll get sad. "Please, are you feeling good?" He says, trying his hardest to hear your compliments, curling his fingers inside you.
He is literally so scared of hurting you; he immediately stopped and comforted you the first time he heard you whimper. Even after you tell him it's just a response, he still peppers your face with kisses, telling you how good you feel wrapped around his cock.
Tomas doesn't hold back with his volume, moaning and groaning in your ear. This guy definitely whimpers if you tease him enough.
He was gentle yet quick with his thrusts. "Mmph!" He bit his lip, feeling himself nearing his release, but he wanted to prolong your pleasure. "So warm…" He moaned into your ear.
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Kuai Liang • Scorpion
Kuai Liang cannot keep his hands off you, even in public. He often tenderly holds onto your waist, playfully whispering suggestive things into your ear.
"I can't wait til you take this dress off," Kuai whispered, his warm fingers digging into your skin.
He loves it when you make marks on him, of course, where nobody can see. Scratch at his back, give him hickeys, love bites. He loves seeing your markings on his body.
He goes feral for cowgirl. Seeing you bounce up and down on his cock, the way your heat sinks down perfectly onto his dick. It's his favorite position, and you can tell by the way he moans and grabs at your body, touching you all over.
"You're doing wonderful," He groaned, mesmerized by how your heat swallowed his cock. "Just like that, my love." One hand grabbed at your breasts while the other rested on your thigh.
As you approach your climax, he'll tell you how much of a good girl you are and how much he loves you. He'll basically walk you through your release.
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Bi Han • Sub Zero
He loves making you beg. He will edge you for hours to hear you whine and whimper his name.
"Bi-Bi Han," You choked out a sob. "Please, please let me come," You tried to reason. You were sat on his cock at his desk as he wrote something on a scroll. As you tried to wiggle, his grip was tight on your hip, keeping you in place.
"Be a good whore and stop moving," He sneered. "Maybe if you beg enough, I'll let you."
He gets jealous VERY easily. Seeing a man strike up a friendly conversation with you? His hands will be wrapped around you in seconds. As soon as you both are in private, you better pray. It's going to be a rough night.
Loves hair pulling, spanking, and leaving hickeys on you.
He presses his hand against your stomach to feel himself sliding in and out. It drives him crazy and makes him impossibly more possessive.
Sometimes, in the heat of the moment, he'll make the room chillier, ice forming under his fingertips. Occasionally he'll make his cock cold, groaning as your pussy warms it up. When he comes in you, you'll feel a cold and cool sensation in your stomach.
"Such a good slut, all wet and ready for me," He spoke, as he slid his dick in between your folds, teasing you. His tip was cold and made shivers run through your body. He slowly entered you, your warmth enveloping him.
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Text
Kinktober day 8 | Tate Langdon x Reader
Day 8: mommy kink
Word count: 1.4k
Warnings: 18+, grinding, praising, slight degrading, overstimulation,
my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time
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‘’I like when you do that.’’ 
‘’Do what?’’ 
‘’Fix my hair when it gets in my face. Run your hand down my back when I’m laying down. Make sure I ate today,’’ he explained as you rubbed your thumb over the back of his hand as you held hands on the way home, sensing his anxiety after a long day. You had a knack for knowing exactly what he needed. ‘’Take care of me.’’ 
‘’I just love you. People take care of the ones they love,’’ you said simply. 
Tate looked down at the sidewalk, his old converses suddenly very interesting to look at. ‘’I’ve never had anyone taking care of me before,’’ he admitted, feeling a lump of sadness settling in his stomach. 
His words made your heart ache. It was rare Tate would bring up his home life, preferring to escape it than bother you with his problems, but you knew Constance never really took good care of Tate — or any of her children. She was a terrible and neglectful mother, blaming the end of her acting career on him when her failure came from herself. 
You opened your mouth to say something, but closed it when you couldn’t find the words. Instead, you squeezed his hand and walked the rest of the way to your house in silence. 
*
A few days later, you were watching a movie in your bed when your phone buzzed with a message from Tate. He hadn’t been able to come over today because Constance had invited her new boyfriend for dinner and wanted everyone to be there. 
From Tate: Can I come over? I’m already outside… 
Pushing your blanket off your body, you paused your movie and went downstairs, opening the door instead of texting him back. 
You found him sitting on your porch with his hands covering his face, looking like he had been there for a few minutes. His eyes were a bit red, matching his sore-bitten lips. It was a stark contrast to the green of his sweater.
‘’I had an argument with my mom and her new toy,’’ Tate explained once he was in the comfort of your bedroom. He rubbed at his face, attempting to erase the traces of his emotions. 
You nodded, sitting on the bed beside him. ‘’Do you want to talk about it?’’ 
He shook his head, not wishing to repeat what had been said. ‘’Can you just hold me? Please.’’
Without a word, you opened your arms, and Tate nestled into your embrace, giving him the love and comfort Constance failed to give her son. 
‘’Whatever has been said at that dinner, just know that your mother is wrong,’’ you spoke softly after a moment, your head resting on top of his as he held you tight. ‘’You’re loved and wanted and you didn't ruin her life, okay? Not you or Addie.’’ 
He sniffled and nodded against your chest. ‘’I love you too.’’ 
After a moment, his hold loosened, slowly calming down…and undoubtedly noticing the absence of a bra through your shirt. Lucky boy. You fought a smile, having not considered your attire when you went downstairs to get the door. 
‘’Do you feel comfortable like this?’’ you asked, breaking the silence.
Tate smiled smugly against your shirt, nodding. ‘’Very. They’re so soft and comfortable. I wish I could fall asleep like that at night.’’  
‘’Do you want me to take my shirt off?’’ you whispered, taking him by surprise. 
He nodded again, detaching himself from you so you could take off your shirt and fell back against your pillows in a more comfortable position. 
When you first suggested it, you didn’t think it would take a sexual turn, but Tate’s mouth began kissing at your breasts while his hands were massaging and kneading, fingers digging into soft flesh. God, he loved your tits. 
You would be lying if you said this wasn’t pleasurable. Tate was gentle and loving with his touches and kisses, savoring the moment. Your hand naturally found its way to his hair, running through his blond strands and encouraging him to keep going. 
Then, you began feeling something press against your thigh. 
‘’Not my fault. I can’t control what my dick does.’’
You bit back a laugh. ‘’Do you want me to take care of it?’’ Your hand wandered between your bodies to rub his hardening cock over his pants. 
Tate whimpered and pushed into your touch. ‘’Please.’’ 
He lifted his head from your chest, his eyes still red but no longer teary, and you motioned to take your spot and lay against your pillows.
‘’Mommy’s gonna take good care of you,’’ you promised, leaning down to give him a sweet kiss. ‘’I’m gonna make you feel so good, Tate. So good you’re gonna forget about tonight.’’
That’s exactly what he needed.
With your help, Tate discarded his pants and boxers, causing his cock to slap against his stomach. It must not have felt good straining against his stiff jeans. 
‘’Does that feel good, baby?’’ you asked, slowly running one finger over his sensitive length, teasing him.
He nodded, a shaky breath slipping from his lips. ‘’Y-yes.’’
You did it again, this time ending your stroke by brushing your thumb over the head. 
Tate whimpered, his hips jerking upwards and causing his sweater to ride up his stomach, flashing a trail of light blond hair. You leaned down to kiss it. 
‘’Such a good boy,’’ you praised, continuing to jerk him with your delicate hand. 
You could jerk him off until he spilled, but you decided to have some fun and try something else. Withdrawing your hand, Tate started sitting up. 
‘’Where are you going?’’ he asked, sounding alarmed. 
‘’I’m not going anywhere,’’ you reassured, caressing his thigh. ‘’Don’t worry.’’ 
Nodding, he settled back and watched you move, licking his lips as you removed your pajama bottoms and underwear. His deep brown eyes gave your body a look over, loving everything he was seeing. The natural fall of your breasts and the reddish-mauve mark his mouth left behind, the tiny mole right below your navel that no one but him had noticed, the scar on your calf from when you shaved and accidentally cut yourself. 
‘’You’re so pretty, Mommy. Can I have a kiss?’’ 
It was so nicely asked, you couldn’t deny him. 
You swung a leg over to straddle him, your hands rubbing his hips as his thick cock rested against his stomach, hard and leaking at the tip. The sight almost made the arousal between your legs drip. Your eyes met Tate's as you rose up on your knees, but instead of sinking down on his cock, you lowered yourself on the length and grinded your slick folds along it.
He moaned from the slightest bit of friction, feeling your pussy sliding languidly along his cock.
 A smirk drew across your lips, moving torturously slow. 
Tate whimpered your name, his voice laced with frustration and desire. 
‘’What is it, baby? Is this not what you wanted?’’ you asked coyly, the sound of your arousal mixing with his pre-cum filling the room. 
You saw his eyes dart down to where your genitals were touching, rubbing together. ‘’Mommy, plea-please,’’ he whined, his cock twitching and about to burst. 
You knew what he wanted, but you weren’t going to give it to him — yet. 
‘’Are you close, baby?’’ 
He closed his eyes and gripped the sheets as his stomach spasmed. ‘’I’m gonna cum, I wanna cum.’’ 
‘’Don’t hold back, baby, you can cum.’’
Ropes and ropes of white cum then spilled onto Tate's smooth stomach, his climax hitting, but you didn’t stop like he thought you would. No. You decided to push his limits and tease him until he couldn’t take it, watching his hips lifting off the bed as his orgasm came again and again, ropes of cum shooting out of his cock and adding to the mess. You were surprised he could still cum like that. 
‘’Can't cum anymore. So sensitive,’’ he said with tear-stained cheeks, whimpering through his orgasm and a little after it was done.
‘’You want me to stop?’’
‘’Please.’’ 
You caressed his cheek, wiping some of the tears. ‘’But I haven’t put it in yet...’’
All and more taglist: @spiokybirdstarfish @kenqki @liidiaaag @hawkegfs  @gillybear17  @areaderinlove @acornacreacure @black-rose-29 @fudge13 @cece05 @rosie-cameron @Caxddce @laylasbunbunny @gemofthenight @beautyb1ade  @hi-bored-as-fcuk-rn  @lovelyy-moonlight @mellabella101 @vxnity713  @marzipaanz  @bisexualgirlsblog @queenofslytherin889 @thatbxtchesblog @softb-tterfly @ethanlandrycanbreakmyheart  @xyzstar  @graceberman3  @Heartsforneteyamsully  @aerangi  @hallecarey1  @bxbyyyjocelyn @mikeyspinkcup @jackierose902109 @daisydark @laurasdrey @mischieftom @fanatic4niall @peterholland04 @Idkwhattonamethisblogs @grxnde-dwt
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strawberry-cowmilk · 7 months
Text
the brothers when they realise mc will die one day
-> brothers x mc
a/n: it's been a good minute since I wrote actual ultimate painful angst so here you go while I wait for my hot makeup sponge soap soup to help me clean the things
mc's gender is not mentioned, not proof read
content warnings: angst, death, crying, sports injury
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Lucifer
he was peacefully listening to a new record he got with you next to him
lucifer was a great fan of this certain composer so he started to talk a little about the music and the meaning behind it
'the composer wrote this piece for their deceased partner-' he suddenly went quiet once he realised he will be like the composer one day
you had already fallen asleep to hear what he said, lucifer carefully pressed you close, afraid of waking you up and afraid of the day you'll leave him
Mammon
mammon was very bored since lucifer took away his card as a punishment, so he decided to watch tv
he was just browsing the channels and ended up watching the news
mammon was already upset about not having his card, and all the depressing stuff on the news made him more sad, and one certain report hit him with the reality that humans die way before demons
tears stung at his eyes as he instantly called you, asking where you are and if you're willing to cuddle him
Leviathan
he got a new game off of akuzon and you're playing it together
it just happens that you're absolutely terrible at this game so you keep dying every two minutes
it was funny at first, you and levi were laughing about it until he suddenly went quiet and started crying
before you could ask him what happened he hugged you and started begging you to not die for real
it took some while for him to calm down a little, you're his (only) friend, how will he live without you?
Satan
he was working on a group rad project with solomon, eventually he started talking about how he accidentally made himself immortal
eventually satan demanded to know how he did it, and he was pretty angrily asking too, during the conversation he realised you are not immortal (unlike solomon)
the prof literally had to separate them because satan was getting too angry
satan wasted no time, he went to look for you so he can spend time with you and forget his awful thoughts
Asmodeus
there was some fashion week event in the devildom and some high fashion brand asked asmo to model for them (he accepted)
but on the day of the event, it got cancelled
asmo was not pleased with this, but you told him it's ok and you can watch him on the catwalk next time he gets invited, but the thing is that probably won't be until another 500 years-
he realised there's a very good chance you won't be alive for the next time, he cried and clung to you, denying reality
Beelzebub
beel was playing the finals of his fangol game and things were getting very serious, there were players getting tackled left and right pretty badly
his mind started to drift away from the game for a while, and remembered that time you asked him to play with you
but if you, a human, were on this field, you'd probably get badly injured, or worse
the coach had to get a time out because the team's got beel literally crying his eyes out on the bench
the team won, but beel is not in the mood for celebrating
Belphegor
it just randomly hit him
he was looking at the stars next to you in the planetarium and something about the stars today made him think about everything, and eventually the fact that humans don't live long compared to demons
he turned to you, said something along the lines of 'don't go' and curled up against you, falling asleep
belphie needed to give himself a good dream right now otherwise he feels like he won't be able to handle it now
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heavenlyvision · 3 months
Text
Begrudgingly betrothed
Word count: 23.6k
Pairing: Kuai Liang x F!Reader
A/N: It is done, I am sorry it took so long but as you can see, it is my longest fic so far !!! I may have gotten carried away but I am quite proud of this monstrosity of a fic so, please enjoy <33
Summary:  There has been arrangements for you to marry a good friend of yours and you weren’t included in the discussion, now you have to come to terms with wedding a man you don’t love, understand why you have been put in this situation and learn to enjoy leaving home and living somewhere new.  
Warnings: 18+ only, smut, virgin!reader, dirty talk, dry humping, thigh fucking, fingering, cunnilingus,  minor dacryphilia, tiny bit of size kink (if you squint), tease!Kuai, mentions of panic attacks, reader has both a mother and father, I think that is all !! <3
MDNI
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This is… not an ideal situation for you. You have just been made aware, not asked, made aware, of the fact that you will be marrying Kuai Liang of the Shirai Ryu. It has been arranged between your family and the clan, and they both left you out of the conversation. To be fair, it could be worse, you know Kuai and have for a bit now but you did not foresee this coming. The shock of the situation and neglect to include you in the conversation is what has you upset the most.
Also, the fact that Kuai didn’t mention this to you at all? Is odd, you are close with him and you’ve always thought of him as your good friend, so to have him not bring up being arranged to marry him, at all… is upsetting and suspicious. But in the end, it’s not like what you think matters, considering this has already been decided for you and you’d really rather not kick up a fuss. It wouldn’t end well for you.
Picking your battles is smart, it’s a philosophy you live by and going against your father… is a battle you would not win, not this time anyways. You can tell, when he looks you in the eyes to tell you what is happening, he is not concerned with your feelings, he is only telling you the reality of what is going to happen.
At least it is not a stranger but somehow it’s not that much better, since Kuai didn’t tell you. You suppose, he probably has his reasons but you can’t get over being passed around like property, it’s sad, it makes you sad that your father is casting you off so easily and it also makes you sad that Kuai is, compliant with it, at the very least.
“This is something that will be happening,” your fathers voice is stern, even.
You look him in the eyes, firm, resolute, “I am aware and I will not resist but that does not mean I am happy, and I will not lie and say I am either.”
He is unmoved by your voiced displeasure, “You will do whatever makes this process go smoothly and you will do what you are told.”
You feel, so much right now but your face remains emotionless, unwilling to break in front of your father, “Fine but I am going to tell you right now, to me, this is unforgivable.”
Your father raises a brow at you, feeling no sympathy, “I do not need your forgiveness, I have done nothing wrong.”
He is unbelievable, so you tell him, “I hope one day, you will see how wrong you are but for now I will live with the fact that you have cast off your only daughter to be wed without her consent.”
“And I hope one day, you understand my actions and realise you are being a petulant child,” he retorts.
You ignore him and his rude statement, “If there is nothing further to be discussed, I would like to leave.”
He waves a dismissive hand at you, “Yes, fine, leave.”
Standing to your feet, you leave the formal dining area. He had asked you there under false pretences, you had expected a nice afternoon chat with your dad over tea and instead he dropped this bomb on you. After you shut the door, you head towards the garden, needing fresh air and solace to collect your thoughts. This is going to be a… trying couple of weeks.
The garden is quiet, you sit on an old wooden bench, looking out towards all the greenery. It’s a nice garden, your mother has worked hard on tending to it, the flowers are beautiful, at least they usually are. None of the flowers are blooming at the moment, dead or dormant for the colder months. It fills you with a sense of melancholy to know you are not going to see this garden as frequently after your marriage.
You’re facing the entrance currently and so you can see when Kuai Liang is making his way towards you. Normally, you would be pleased to see him but after the news you’ve just received, you are… maybe not unhappy to see him but certainly not excited either and he can tell as much when he looks to you, his demeanour sheepish as he approaches.
“I’m guessing your father has told you,” he says, standing in front of you.
You look up to him, “You mean that we have new tea?” you say sardonically before continuing, “Or maybe you are referring to the fact that I am supposed to be marrying you within the next few weeks, something that has been in the works for a couple of weeks without my knowledge and not only that but the fact that this will result in me having to leave my home and move somewhere unfamiliar, with people I do not know well?” Your face displays no extreme emotions but your tone is filled with threatening politeness.
There’s a few moments of silence, Kuai only looks at you, not knowing what to say to make this better and to be quite frank, there is nothing that will make you feel better at this current moment.
Your expression changes to a more easy going one, “Yes, he told me.”
Kuai sighs, “He was meant to wait for me, I wanted to speak with you first.”
“Well, that is where you went wrong,” you wave a hand at him, explaining, “He has to be the one to do things first, he was never going to let you tell me this.” Your father has an odd complex, he has the only say in things and he will be the first one to inform others of what they are to do. ‘Orders’ come from him and him alone.
Distantly, you wonder if he told you first because it will be the last ‘order’ he can give you before you are given away to another man. This is gross, it feels like swapping handlers, you feel as though you have no freedom and that all the times your father had told you, that you were so much more than just a woman, just a future wife, were lies. Like he meant none of it.
It feels as though, the relationship with your father will never be the same again and coming to terms with that is going to be hard.
You pat the spot beside you on the bench, “Sit down.”
“Thank you,” Kuai replies, sitting cautiously beside you.
It’s awkward between the two of you, mostly because you can tell Kuai has more to say but you won’t even look in his direction, which is making it hard for him to gain an opening to talk. It feels mean, but you know what else feels mean? Getting betrothed to a friend and not being told, even though he knew it was happening.
You sigh beside him, “Kuai, are you sure about this?”
“Yes,” he doesn’t hesitate in answering.
“What about you and Harumi?” You were pretty sure they had something going on between the two of them.
He’s looking at you, “What about her?”
Your eyes stay forward but you really want to look at him and roll them dramatically, “What do you mean ‘what about her’? Everyone was pretty sure you two were going to wed.”
He turns his own face forward, looking out to the garden, “We are just friends, nothing more.”
“Be honest with yourself Kuai, I don’t want to be the reason you miss your chance at love.” You feel empty, this isn’t how you wanted to marry and it will suck even more if Kuai doing this causes him to miss out on love.
He is unconcerned by your hesitations, his tone even when he speaks, “I do not feel that way, not for Harumi.”
“But you feel that way for someone?” He doesn’t reply, “My concern is still warranted then.” You finish, his silence a clear indication that he feels some type of way for someone.
He wavers for a moment, going to say something before deciding against it.
You talk before him, making yourself clear, “If you still want to go through with this, in spite of your feelings for someone else, then that is fine. I will do whatever is asked of me but I want you to know… I think you should marry the person you love.”
Kuai stands up from the bench, his back to you, “Your concern is noted.” Is all he says before he walks away.
You’re left in the garden by yourself, Kuai has walked off, assumedly leaving for the day, he seemed to be getting annoyed at your pushing. The mention of him not marrying the person he loves probably displeasing him, which is fair but he also has the power to stop this from happening. This is all very confusing for you, no one even told you it was happening and now it seems like both your father and Kuai are neglecting to tell you everything. Neglecting to tell you the things that would have all of this making sense. Typical men.
At least the air around you is fresh, cold, but fresh and it’s helping to calm you down. Both the conversations between Kuai and your father not going well has upset you but at least the cool breeze is relieving, it’s what you need to gather yourself before moving forward. You’ll just have to look on the bright side… which you will do, when you find out what the bright side is. Because so far there doesn’t seem to be anything bright about this situation but maybe that is just your bad mood talking.
You stay in the garden for a while, thinking about all the things that are about to change for you. The actual wedding won’t be for a few weeks but that doesn’t mean you get to stay here; your father informed you that you have one week left here and then you are to be moved to the Shirai Ryu village. An upsetting fact but you will cope, at least you will know some of the people there. And by some, you mean Tomas, Raiden and Harumi, everyone else is a stranger but it’s better than nothing.
₊ ⊹
When you head back to the house, everyone is waiting at the dinner table for you and by everyone, you mean Kuai is also sat at the table. He had stayed, apparently and now you have to sit through a very uncomfortable dinner with your mother, father and Kuai – your soon to be husband.
Sighing lightly and mostly to yourself, you move to your usual spot, sat across from Kuai, your mother and father sit at either end of the table. Judging by the atmosphere of the room already, this is going to be a long dinner.
Looking to Kuai, you can’t read much about how he is feeling. He is stoic and looks to be calm, but you can’t tell if he really feels that way or if everything he is feeling, is occurring internally. His eyes lock onto yours and you hold his gaze, wanting to challenge him, his eyes are unmoving and firm. You keep looking at him but you need to blink, you try holding out for as long as you can before your eyes start to water and you have to close them.
When you look back at him, one of his brows are raised humorously at you, entertained by your poor attempt at a staring competition. It wasn’t your initial intent to try and start a staring contest, only wanting to display your irritation for this situation but now you’re even more annoyed that you couldn’t get him to blink before you. You aren’t even convinced he’s blinked yet, weirdo.
Scowling lightly, you look away from him and down to your food. Your parents have been talking but you haven’t really been listening, all your attention was on Kuai Liang and his stupid face. Why he has stayed eludes you but you’re sure you will find out soon enough, it’s too late for him to leave now, he’ll probably stay the night and he’ll probably want to speak with you again before he leaves, presumably tomorrow.
“Are you paying attention to me?” Your fathers voice booms from the head of the table.
Your posture shoots up and your head flicks in his direction to look at him, you don’t know how to tell him you weren’t. He seems very angry, he’s never raised his voice like that to you before, his behaviour is starting to distress you.
Kuai speaks for you, trying to help, “It was my fault, I was distracting her.”
Your father is displeased though, you can tell by the way the corner of his eye twitches slightly and how his mouth pulls up, he goes to say something but your mother talks over him, “Now, I think that is quite enough, let’s eat and they can talk later, hmm?” She poses it like a question but it isn’t one, she’s telling him what to do right now and he concedes, like he most often does when it comes to your mother.
Dinner is silent and uncomfortable and you want to rip your eyes out of your head because this is the worst thing you’ve had to sit through. Last time you felt like this was when your parents had been arguing for weeks straight and then suddenly stopped, choosing to punish each other silently instead… which was somehow, way worse than the yelling and bickering.
You chance a glance up to Kuai and he’s already looking at you, his eyes are sympathetic to you and how uncomfortable you must feel but you feel worse for him. This isn’t his house or his family, it must be incredibly painful to try and eat dinner with a family that is currently annoyed with each other.
Taking initiative, you push back from your seat, “I’d like to talk with Kuai now, privately.” You squint at your father, frustration with him palpable.
“Thank your mother for dinner first,” he mumbles out.
Turning to your mother, you graciously say, “Thank you for dinner, it was lovely.”
“You’re very welcome,” she smiles and scrunches her nose at you affectionately.
As you round behind her chair, you kiss the top of her head before grabbing Kuai’s hand and tugging him off after you, he makes sure to thank your parents as he’s pulled along. You don’t look back and continue dragging him behind you, leading him to your room. It will be quiet there and you can maybe get some answers out of him.
“Where are you taking me?” He’s being pliant, letting you continue to lead him, even though he very easily could get you to stop in your tracks.
You try ignoring him but he tugs back a bit, showing you just how easily he could stop complying with you. Groaning and without looking back at him, you say, “My room.”
He stops all at once and your back collides with his chest. He doesn’t move though, not even taking a step back from you falling into him. He leans down behind you, mouth next to your ear, “Is that appropriate?”
His voice is deep and sets you on edge, a shiver threatening to run down your spine at the low timbre of his voice. You suppress it as best you can before turning your face to the side, both of you close like this. You thought he would pull away from you but he doesn’t, he doesn’t move an inch. His eyes are lidded as he looks at you, it feels like his gaze is burning through you.
Your head flicks forward, not able to handle the way he was looking at you just now, all the blood in your body feels like it’s rushed to your face. He pulls away from you, a hand landing on your shoulder. You gather yourself quickly and tell him, “It is appropriate, I have questions and you have answers.”
One of your hands grabs his from your shoulder and you walk off again, he trails silently behind you this time, letting you drag him around. His hand is very warm, warmer than before, he’d be handy to have close by this winter. You suppose that could be a bright side, you’re marrying a pyromancer in the middle of winter. It’s not much but the thought makes you smile.
When you approach your room, you open the door to let him in first and tell him to sit anywhere. You follow in behind him, shutting the door and turning to look at him. He is awkwardly standing in the middle of your room; he seems to be having trouble deciding where to sit. You watch him struggle for a bit, before he seemingly decides to just stand.
Laughing to yourself, you walk up to him and push on his chest, he walks back until his legs hit the edge of your bed, “Sit.” You tell him.
He sits down, carefully, eyes looking up into yours, “You are demanding.”
You roll your eyes at him and move across the room, when you come back, you’re dragging a chair you had kept in the corner. You place it in front of him and sit down, crossing one leg over the other. His eyes watch the way your legs move before looking back to you.
Kuai’s frame is still, not moving and very clearly not relaxed. It’s funny, looking at this large man sit uncomfortably on your bed. He shuffles a bit from side to side, trying to make the best of his situation.
“Do you want the chair?” You ask, taking pity on him.
He looks to you, “I am fine…”
You get up anyways and move over to him, offering your hand to pull him up. He takes it but pulls you down beside him instead, your outer thigh is pressed against his. You jostle against him a bit, the mattress bouncing lightly with your weight and the force of Kuai’s pull.
You pull your hand from his and gently slap at his shoulder, “What was that for?”
“I told you I was fine.”
“Whatever, go sit in the chair,” you huff out.
“No, I am comfortable here,” he says, amused as you sigh exasperatedly at him.
You cave, letting him do whatever he wants, “Fine.”
“What did you want to know?” He asks, redirecting the conversation.
Your posture slouches a bit, already wanting the conversation to be over, “Why didn’t you tell me? That I am to marry you?” you pause for a moment before continuing, “You have known for weeks now, I see you every week and have done for a while now. Did you not think this was something I would have liked to know about?”
He thinks for a moment, on how to phrase his words, “You deserved to know… but I did not have much of a choice.”
That confuses you, so you clarify, “In getting engaged to me?”
He shakes his head as he answers quickly, “No, no that is my choice… it was not my choice to keep it from you, your father decided that.” He doesn’t look thrilled by your fathers choice.
Your voice feels small, “You could have told me anyways.”
“No, I could not have. You are amazing…” he places a hand on your knee and squeezes,
You squint at him, “I feel a ‘but’ coming.”
“But, you are… confrontational?” He sees the way you frown at him when he describes you that way and corrects himself, “Or maybe curious is a better word… you would have wanted to speak with your father as soon as I told you.”
Looking away, you mumble out to him, “If you were worried about my father… I would not have told him, that you told me.”
“It was important to him that I say nothing, he wanted to speak with you… well, together but I suppose he decided against that in the end.” He’s trying to be gentle with you, his voice warm.
Facing him again, your eyes are filled with emotions and you can’t help it, “I am still very confused, he… he never had any intentions of marrying me off.”
“All I can tell you is that he does now, I don’t know what changed for him but I had heard he was looking for… possible suitors for you,” Kuai’s face scrunches up in distaste.
Your voice shakes with your question, “He was going to marry me off to… anyone?”
“I am sure not just anyone… but he was looking, yes.”
Your eyes well with tears, not only are you being given away without regard for your own feelings but he wasn’t even going to… he wasn’t even going to marry you to someone you knew.
Kuai grabs the side of your face tenderly, forcing eye contact between the two of you. A tear slips down your cheek and his thumb rubs it away, stroking your cheek gently. “I know… I know you may be upset with me and maybe what I’ve done is wrong but I offered– I insisted that I be the one you marry.”
Kuai marrying you, Kuai asking to marry you, is a kindness. A favour he is doing for you, to prevent a marriage between yourself and a stranger and as upset as you are with him, you are more upset with your father. Especially since, right now it feels as though Kuai is your only ally.
Your lip quivers a bit, trying to hold back more tears. He shushes you and pulls you to him, his warm arms wrapping around your body and holding you close, keeping you safe. One of his hands rests on the back of your head, stroking it, attempting to comfort and calm you. You reciprocate his hug, wrapping your own arms around his frame and pulling him closer, he feels sturdy and reliable.
“It’s going to be okay, I have you,” he mumbles into the top of your head and you believe him.
He holds you until you pull away from him first, once you’re no longer worried about crying, you sit back properly and wipe at your eyes, “I’m sorry.”
“You have nothing to be sorry for… I know this is hard for you,” his expression is sympathetic to you.
“I just… wish he had explained his reasoning more, maybe then it wouldn’t feel so out of the blue,” you sigh out before flopping back on the mattress, tired from the events of today. Your forearm covers your eyes as you lay down.
Kuai hums out to you in mindless agreement but doesn’t say anything further, his lack of a real response confuses you and when you uncover your eyes, you see he’s already looking at you. His eyes move up your stretched out body, silently watching you.
“Kuai Liang,” you call out to him, louder than your last sentence.
The shock of your voice contrasted against the quiet room has his eyes flicking back to yours, “What did you say?”
Something occurs to you and you sit up beside him again, he’s surprised by your sudden movements, eyes widening slightly. You turn to him completely, one of your legs crossed on the mattress.
“Kuai…” you hesitate to ask him your question but he hums at you to continue, “Am I… are we going…” he raises a brow at you, confused as to what you’re trying to ask him, “Do we have to kiss? For the ceremony?” You finally manage to get out.
He stifles a chuckle at your question, “Not if you don’t want to, it’s not necessary… you know that.”
Your mouth pulls to the side, considering things for a moment. He is right, it isn’t necessary but now you’re a little concerned about your future and what it means to be married to Kuai, “I haven’t… I’ve not been kissed.”
“Ever?” He seems taken aback by your confession.
You huff out, “I didn’t tell you to get made fun of, Kuai,” You told him because you’re worried about later, you’ve not had a lot of firsts and if you marry him, you want to respect that, you won’t be looking at others while married to him. You’re just, you’re in a predicament right now.
Before you can convey your concerns in a sensical manner though, he asks, “Do you want me to kiss you?”
You’re shocked by his offer, and also tempted. You suppose you aren’t really going to have many opportunities at intimacy after the marriage, not unless you ask Kuai, the thought has your face burning up.
You feel shy, “Do you mind?”
“Not in the slightest,” he assures you, “Though, if you want me to kiss you, you’ll have to ask for it.”
His words and demeanour set you on edge, his eyes are watching you very closely. Watching how you fidget, “Would you kiss me?” You feel embarrassed and very hot in the face but you add, “Please?”
His expression turns smug and it makes your heart skip a beat, “Since you asked so nicely,” he turns to face you properly and reaches forward, one of his hands grasps your face, the other resting on your knee.
He leans in but you hesitate and he holds still, “I don’t know what I am doing.”
“That’s fine,” His breath fans across your lips, “I will show you.”
Is he trying to kill you? He might kill you, his words and his proximity to you, it’s setting your skin on fire, “Okay.”
“Good,” he murmurs, before leaning in again. You don’t move away this time and he presses his lips to yours.
He’s warm and his lips are soft, you mimic what he’s doing. The kiss is light and tender, he seems to be feeling you out, getting a sense for you. Your hands reach out to him, of their own provocation and wrap around his neck, pulling him closer to you. He hums against you, his own hand on your knee is gripping your skin tighter.
He tilts your head to the side, the hand on your knee wanders higher, landing on your thigh and squeezing there. The grip he has further up your thigh makes you gasp and he licks into your mouth, the feeling new and overwhelming. He’s overpowering all of your senses and an involuntary whimper is pulled from your chest at the way he’s kissing you.
He grunts back at you, his thumb pushes into the hinge of your jaw, forcing your mouth open more. Giving himself more access to you, he’s taking your breath away, kissing you dizzy. You want to rub your thighs together for friction but with the way you’re sitting, it’s not possible. His palm against your leg is hot and it keeps moving further up, now grasping the fattest part of your thigh.
A moan slips past your lips to his and you pull him closer to you, he groans into your mouth. The kiss is hot and needy now, borderline messy. He pulls back momentarily, only to push your back into the mattress. His form follows right after, holding himself over the top of you. His lips are on yours before you can form a coherent thought, his tongue in your mouth again.
His hand grips at your thigh, pulling it upwards and resting it against his hip, not moving more than that. You reach up and tug at his shirt, pulling him onto you, your leg crooks around his side and pulls his hips to yours. The contact has a whiney gasp pulled from you and Kuai fights every urge in his bones to grind down into you.
Your arms loop around his neck again and you get lost in his kiss, in the closeness of his body. He groans deeply against you, as if he’s in pain. The sound shocks you and you pull back from him, your foreheads resting against each other as you huff shallow breaths.
“Are you okay?” You’re worried you did something wrong, or that you’ve hurt him somehow.
He shakes his head against yours, “Mm fine, you didn’t do anything wrong.” His voice is strained.
You sit for a second longer before you realise what had happened and it sets your face alight, “I’m sorry,” you rush out.
“You didn’t do anything wrong,” He repeats, voice still strained, laced with lust.
You had grinded up into him absentmindedly, your mind dazed and looking for friction, resulting in you rutting up into him without thinking. His cock is firm and heavy against you, pulsing with need.
You go to apologise again but he puts his mouth on yours, silencing what you were going to say with a deep kiss. When he pulls back, he rests his forehead on yours again, “You did nothing wrong.” He reiterates.
Your heart feels like it’s about to beat out of your chest, you have nothing to compare it to but you have a feeling that kisses like that are hard to come by. “You’re a really good kisser.”
He looks down at you, amused by your comment, “How would you know?”
“Should I find someone else to kiss? To compare it to?” You tease him.
His gaze is firm, “No, you’re going to be my wife, the only person you will be kissing in the future… will be me.”
The words are possessive, and you think if you weren’t so delirious from his lips on yours, you would argue back against him but at the moment, you think you’re okay with never kissing anyone else, “Okay.”
He smirks at you, enjoying the look in your eyes. They’re wet and needy and he’s getting a lot of pleasure from seeing you like this, for him.
His lips are shiny from the kiss you shared and you can’t look away, wanting so badly for him to put his mouth back on yours, “Can you kiss me again?”
He doesn’t move and only looks at you, “I can.”
A few beats pass by in the quiet room, the only sound you’re able to recognise is the rapid beating of your own heart pumping blood through your head. He still doesn’t move, just watches you, you can’t tell if he’s having an internal conflict or if he’s teasing you. It’s starting to frustrate you though, and to ‘punish’ him for his inaction, the leg you have around his waist pulls him into you harder. Grinding him down into you, the feeling has you gasping, your breath stuttering in your chest.
Kuai groans at you but he also frowns, his hips dig into yours harder and pins your lower half to the bed. He gives you dark look, “Don’t.”
You don’t reply to him, your chest moving quickly with your huffed breaths. He watches you and the way you’re breathless for him, the look on your face and the warmth of your pussy through all the layers has him salivating. He is barely hanging on by a thread, his sanity shredding the longer he has his cock pressed tight against you.
His forehead drops to rest on top of yours, his lips ghosting your own, you move to press your mouth to his. A light kiss, it’s only a peck, it’s all he gives you but you want so much more, you’re hooked on his mouth, drunk on his kisses.
You almost beg him, “Kuai, please–”
He cuts you off with his mouth on yours, his lips urgent and needy, the kiss hot and heavy. Your brain buzzes, lost in the way he licks into your mouth, at the way one of his hands grab the plush skin of your thigh, his other lightly gripping your neck; holding you steady for him. He’s kissing you how he wants too, deeply and fully, taking over all your thoughts, filling your brain with only thoughts of him.
You can’t help the way you throb with need for him, your leg gripping him tighter, wanting him so much closer even though he is as close as he’s going to get. He hums into the kiss at the way you’ve started to grind into him again, your own noises shared in the kiss, small whimpers and quiet whines that he swallows down. Greedy for the small noises you’re making for him.
When he parts from you, you’re both breathless again, your shallow breaths intermingling together with your proximity. Kuai is giving off a thick heat, his skin warm to the touch, his head ducks into your neck and licks you. Ending with a small nip to your skin, he rests his head in the crook of your neck, breathing you in and attempting to catch his breath.
With the way you move under him and the way your leg grips him tight to hold his lower half close, he is going to fall apart on top of you, his head full of depraved thoughts. Wanting so badly to fuck you into the mattress but holding himself back.
“Kuai,” you call to him again.
He groans into your neck, “Shh– just, I need a second.”
You’re confused by what he means, a moment for what? All you want to tell him is how badly you need him right now. “I want you,” your voice is small, as if being quieter will negate the fact that you didn’t give him the moment of silence he asked for.
His hips buck into yours involuntarily, “Fuck–”
A gasp is pulled from you at the friction, Kuai pulls his head from your neck suddenly, pulling back to look at you. His eyes are intense and you turn your head to the side so you feel less exposed to him but his hand grabs the side of your face and pulls it back so you’re looking at him again. He doesn’t move or speak; he’s just enjoying the expression on your face again.
His hips grind down into you and a small moan exits you, you’re unable to supress the sound even if you tried. Kuai’s thumb is on your chin, pulling slightly to ensure any noise you might make comes out.
He slowly grinds into you, the noises you’d rather he not hear slipping from you. You’re burning with need for him, pussy throbbing for more. His brows are pinched together, his breathing huffed, biting his lip to keep the noises that threaten to spill from him suppressed.
Your vision is blurry, tears in your waterline from how badly you want him to do more to you, your eyes pleading with him to just give you more. His hand moves from your chin and his mouth is on yours again, kissing you intensely, his mouth is hot. Everything about him is hot, his temperature so high he’s heating you up.
He rips his mouth from yours and pulls himself up completely, his hands removed from your body and resting himself up on his knees. You’re bewildered by the loss of him and whine, his eyes are on fire as he looks at you below him. Hands clenching into fists beside him, itching to touch you again, to touch your naked skin, to touch every inch of your body.
He’s taking deep breaths, trying to calm himself, “I think we should stop.”
“Why?” Your brows are drawn up at him.
He sighs, “You asked for a kiss and I delivered, we should leave it at that.”
You start pulling yourself off the mattress, weight held up on your elbows, “And if I want to ask for more?”
His eyes hold a warning for you, “Do not.”
You go to argue against him but there are loud footsteps walking to your room, ones you are all too familiar with. Your father is making his way to your room, you look to Kuai with wide eyes and he moves off the bed swiftly, adjusting himself in his pants and smoothing himself out. He’s trying to make it look like he wasn’t just dry humping you, while kissing you stupid.
Moving off the bed, you get to your feet in front of him, he smooths out your hair and clothes for you, his hand holds the side of your face for a moment and his thumb runs over your bottom lip softly. He’s caressing you gently, lost in you for a moment before your fathers loud knocks are suddenly heard on your bedroom door.
Kuai pulls away from you, coming back to himself at the sound of your fathers fist pounding on the wood. Walking around Kuai, you head to the door and open it slightly, enough to see your father but not enough for him to see Kuai further in the room, behind you.
Looking up to your father, you ask, “Yes?”
“I am looking for Kuai Liang, is he still with you?” Your fathers eyes try scanning behind you but there is nothing to see.
“No, he left a bit ago, maybe he is in the bathroom?” You offer as an alternative, trying to get him to leave and go the other way, away from your room.
He hums at you, considering you for a moment, “You know I love you right?”
“I– it doesn’t feel like it right now,” you tell him honestly, your trust in him completely shattered after today.
He looks tired, just so exhausted and like he might apologise, before his facial expression returns to its usual firm manner, “If you see Kuai Liang, let him know, I wish to speak with him.”
“Will do,” you agree hastily, hoping to end this interaction quickly.
He eyes you carefully and then eventually walks away; he seems to have so much to say but doesn’t know how to say it. It isn’t your job to force him to talk, though you might have to if you ever want to know his motivations behind all this. Whatever, it can wait until you aren’t a mess from Kuai.
Shutting the door, you turn around to see Kuai already moving for it to leave and find your father, “You’re going already?”
He pauses and turns to you, “Why?” And then leaning in close, he asks, “Would you like me to stay?” His tone is smug, expression cool and self-pleased.
You look away from him, “If I said yes?”
He sighs, hands coming up to rest on either side of your face, forehead leaning to yours, “I would like to stay.” He takes a moment, “But… I should talk with your father.” He pulls his head away from yours, still holding you in his hands.
Your face scowls at the mention of your father and Kuai’s thumb presses between your brows, massaging to release the tension. You relax your face but are still ultimately pouting at the prospect of him leaving.
He looks at you with a raised brow and you concede to him, “Alright, but try and ask him why it’s suddenly become so important I marry someone.”
“Yes ma’am,” he jokes, eyes lingering on you for a moment.
You aren’t sure why he’s looking at you so seriously but you understand when he leans in and kisses you so very gently, it’s short and only a little more than a peck but it makes your heart swell at how careful he is with you.
He hums when pulling back, “I don’t know if you have been told, but you’re expected to come back with me tomorrow.”
You’re taken aback, “I thought I had one more week?”
“I had asked for it but he changed his mind, earlier today.” He pulls back from you, giving you room to process.
You sigh deeply, feeling empty at this point, “Today has been too much, I’m not sure how to react at this point.”
“I’ll make you as comfortable as I possibly can, I want you to be happy there,” his tone is concerned, genuinely wanting you to be happy with him and with the Shirai Ryu.
You snark out, mostly joking, “I want to have, free will.”
“I will give you as much as I can manage,” he promises.
You tease, leaning towards him, “But kissing others–”
“–Is not on the table.” His tone is stern, expression unamused.
You smile at him sweetly, “I was joking, I will respect our marriage fully and completely”
“Fully and completely? And what exactly does that entail?” His expression is suggestive as he looks at you, subtly moving closer.
You feel nervous but can’t stop yourself from saying, “And if I said anything you wanted?”
“Then I would say, I’d like to test that,” His eyes are dark and lids low as he looks at you, not moving to touch you again but so obviously wanting to.
Your face grows warm under his stare, his voice has a lilt to it that sends shivers down your spine, “Didn’t you have to leave?”
He chuckles lowly at you before grabbing your hand and holding it firmly, “I want you to know… that I will be with you every step of the way and that you can talk to me… about anything.” He squeezes your hand once, in confirmation.
You squeeze his hand back and smile at him kindly, “Thank you… and you know… if you ever have anything you need to talk about, I am here to listen.”
Kuai takes several moments to look at you, and then decides he’s been holding off on leaving you for too long, “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
You don’t really know what to say, you want him to stay longer but know he probably shouldn’t, “Yes, we will talk tomorrow, hopefully you will have more answers for me,” you jest, smiling up to him.
“Hopefully,” he squeezes your hand once more, assuring you that he will try to get more information. He leaves after that, going to catch up with your father.
And now, you’re left alone and wanting Kuai. You miss the weight of his body on top of yours, you’re also feeling confused about your feelings for him. He makes you feel warm and the way he kissed you has you wanting to obey his every will. But you are also confused about his feelings for you, his eyes seem so honest but he had said he had feelings for someone else just earlier today and now you aren’t sure what to make of that.
Maybe, you just need to sleep and move on from today, but currently, you are feeling better towards this marriage. Having spent some time with Kuai and spoken with him more casually, you feel better about things. Knowing he had good intentions behind his actions puts you at ease, clearly, since you just about let him hump you into submission.
It’s a little embarrassing that you were about to beg him to fuck you when you hadn’t ever been kissed before, let alone had sex but he has an effect on you that you’ve never experienced and even though you’ve known him for a while now, he’s never been this forward with you. Feeling desire for someone you consider a friend is weird right? You aren’t sure, you’ve never really desired anyone before, not like this.
There is too much swirling around your head. Ranging from, Kuai and his soft lips, his firm hands, his warm skin, his hips grinding into you, along with thoughts of his grip on your thigh, his eyes as he looked at you, his restrained manner of handling you. All your thoughts are currently of him… you need to sleep this off, before your thoughts become more depraved and you hunt him down and ask him so nicely to take you, right now.
Yeah, it’s probably a good idea to turn in for the night.
₊ ⊹
You spend said night tossing and turning in your bed, waking up every few hours just to roll over and be upset that you’ve woken up before an appropriate time, again. When you finally do fall asleep at some ungodly hour in the morning, you’re startled awake what feels like only a few moments later by knocking on your door. You groan out at whoever is there, not ready to get up, not when you had finally fallen asleep.
They don’t knock again, instead just letting themselves into your room, you peak a look and can see it’s your mother. Groaning at her again, you roll over, shuffling further into your sheets; you are not ready to start the day.
“Come on, it’s time to get up,” her tone is soft, trying to coax you out of bed with kindness.
Another groan, “I don’t want to get up, I am tired.”
She sits on the side of your bed and places a hand soothingly on your back, “You… you’re leaving today.”
“I know, Kuai told me last night,” you grumble at her, mood worsening at remembering the sudden change in plans.
Her hand rubs circles into your back, “I couldn’t change your fathers mind, I am sorry.”
It occurs to you, that your mother probably knows what has changed with your father to incur this sudden behavioural change. You shoot up in your bed and face her, “Why is he doing this?”
She hesitates, eyes sad, “He just wants the best for you.”
Your gaze scrutinises her, “There’s more, isn’t there?”
“I am telling you everything you need to know,” she replies, smiling at you sombrely before her face changes to a more enthusiastic expression, “Now, come on! time to gather your stuff.”
You flop back onto the mattress at her words, grumbling to yourself, you had forgotten that part of leaving would include… packing.
“It isn’t so bad, take your important belongings and some clothes, your father and I can bring over the rest after the marriage.” She pats your shoulder a couple times and moves around your room, looking for bags to put your stuff in.
Moving to watch her, you realise she’s trying very hard to make this easy on the both of you. Attempting to keep her expression easy and tone joyful but you can tell she is sad you are leaving home, especially so soon.
Sighing, you get up to help her, the least you can do is give her the same courtesy. You decide to offer her some words of comfort, “I will be okay you know? I like Kuai Liang, he is kind and I know some of the people in the Shirai Ryu already. I will adjust.”
She pauses what she’s doing and looks to you, “I know dear, I raised you well,” she flexes her arm at you jokingly, “Be strong and keep your head up. I know you will continue to fill me with pride,” She moves closer to you and places a hand on your shoulder, squeezing once, “You always have.”
Her words have you fighting back tears, you don’t want her to see you cry, you replace the look on your face with a strained smile, “I will do my best.”
“That’s all you ever need to do,” She pulls you into her for a hug, holding you in her embrace for a moment. You aren’t sure which one of you needs this more.
When she pulls back, she claps her hands together once and rubs them, “Alright, let’s get stuck into this.”
Rolling your eyes and supressing a smile you ask, “Where should I start, boss?”
She chuckles at you brightly and directs you on where to begin. It doesn’t take all that long to collect your most important stuff and pack it away. Anything left behind today will be picked up at a later date and even though you’ve not packed everything away, your room looks significantly more bare compared to before.
Your mother stops and looks around, “Well, I think that is about everything you will need for now.”
“Yeah I think this is good,” you smile at her.
She heads for your door, “You still have a bit of time before you have to leave, maybe have a nap, you look very tired.”
Shooting her a light-hearted glare you say, “Wow, I wonder why.”
She just smiles cheekily at you before leaving your room, presumedly going to tend to her plants, the garden may be wilting but she has a greenhouse with copious amounts of flourishing plants and flowers. The winter doesn’t stop her green thumb and it never has.
You listen to her advice though and the first thing you do when alone is get back into bed, not even making it the whole way up, just sort of flopping onto it and staying there. You’ve made yourself comfortable now, there is no way you’re getting up, not unless there’s a fire or something.
A few moments of peace is all you get before there is another knock on your door, “Are you awake?” Speaking of fire, Kuai has come to see you.
You huff face down into the mattress and mumble out, “You can come in.”
“What? I can’t hear you,” his tone is amused.
Grunting you hold your head up so your mouth isn’t pressed into the sheets, “I said, you can come in.” Your tone is exasperated as your head collapses back onto the bed.
The door opens and closes behind you and Kuai stifles a laugh at your body slumped on your mattress, not even bothering to make it to the pillows further up.
“Are you okay?” He asks tentatively, a little worried you’re going to snap at him.
Your words are mumbled again, “Mm fine.”
Kuai moves beside you and flops down too, laying on his back, “I spoke with your father last night,” that catches your attention and your head turns to the side to look at him, “Don’t get excited, he didn’t tell me anything new, just that it was important to him and that it is what’s best for you.”
You scowl at him, unimpressed with your fathers answer, “He’s starting to get on my nerves.”
“Starting?” Kuai asks playfully.
Your scowl deepens, “Whatever, leave me alone. I didn’t get enough sleep last night.”
“I wonder why that is,” he says smugly, knowing it has something to do with him.
Turning back to the mattress, you hide your face from him, looking at him for too long is becoming your weakness. You can’t help it, he’s the one who looks so kissable, you might need therapy or something, these cannot be normal thoughts to have for a friend. Though, making out with a friend is also not normal? But then again, he is also your soon to be husband, this is all so frustrating.
Suddenly, you remember what you remembered last night, he’s in love with someone else but is marrying you out of kindness. He’s preventing you from marrying a stranger because of his concern for you but now you’re concerned about his happiness. But if he doesn’t like you, why did he kiss you like that? Was he just… in the mood or was he in the mood for you? GODS! men.
You must be grumbling to yourself out loud without realising because Kuai laughs beside you, amused at your internal conflict, “What are you worried about now?”
Sitting up, you tell him, “You actually,” he raises a brow at you, as if to say ‘oh?’, “You said you love someone–”
“–I never said I love someone, you did,” he interjects, also moving to sit up and face you.
You retort back, “But you implied it,” he keeps his mouth shut this time, knowing you’re right, “I am just confused? Worried? I mean… we kissed last night–”
“–I think it was a bit more than a kiss,” he interrupts again.
You look at him and don’t hesitate to say, “…Right, well that kind of adds to my point then doesn’t it?”
“And what is your point?” He’s pushing you to say what you mean.
“If you stopped interrupting me I could get there,” your eyebrow raises at him in admonishment, “I am just… I guess I’m just confused about what you’re feeling… because you love someone else… but then you…” you look away from him, “…You kissed me like that last night and I don’t know how to feel… I don’t know how you feel.” Embarrassment is seeping into every fibre of your being, feeling really exposed at being honest with him.
He intakes a deep breath, “I kissed you like that because I wanted to.”
Turning your head back, you shoot him a pointed look, telling him that what he’s offered is not enough, “Kuai–”
He stops you before you get even more annoyed at him, “–I love you.”
You’re shocked and have no idea how to react to that, “I–”
“–I kissed you like that because I love you and have for a while now,” he’s looking right at you, unashamed by his feelings, “I am not expecting you to feel the same, I am only telling you so you worry less, so you don’t think I am the type of man who kisses someone like that for no reason.” His words are filled with emotion but also stated as fact, he’s informing you of his feelings, not asking anything of you in return.
You heart stutters in your chest and you look like a deer caught in headlights, he doesn’t need you to feel the same but his sudden confession has put the weight of the world on your shoulders.
You calm your nerves to tell him how you feel, “I am not sure how I feel towards you–”
Kuai doesn’t let you finish your sentence, “–I told you; I do not need you to–”
“¬–Could you stop interrupting me?” You look at him exasperatedly, getting tired of not finishing your thoughts, “I am not sure how I feel towards you but I know that I like you… more than a friend, and I wouldn’t have let you kiss me like that if I didn’t.” Your gaze averts his, looking anywhere but his eyes.
He’s smiling to himself, “You like me?”
“I mean… obviously…” you pout slightly.
He hums at you and moves closer, pulling you to his chest by the back of your head, he holds you against him, “I can work with that.”
If he touched your face he would be able to feel the way you’re burning up, his confession and your own making you nervous and embarrassed. This is certainly not how you thought the past couple days would have unfolded but as Kuai holds you to him, you can’t help but feel okay right now.
You snuggle into him slightly, your arms wrapping around his torso to properly be held by him, “I am still feeling uncertain about the future… but right now, I think I am good,” your words are mumbled into the fabric of his shirt.
His chest rumbles under you, humming, “Whatever you are still worried about, I will be with you… every step of the way.”
Pulling your head back, you rest your chin on his chest and ask, “Promise?”
He looks down to you and without hesitation says, “Promise.”
His actions make more sense to you now and that fills you with relief, even if it also frightens you somewhat. Right now, is okay though, being held by him and being assured he’ll be with you, it makes everything okay… just for now, in this quiet moment between the two of you, everything is okay.
Raising yourself up, you push your face into his neck, feeling the urge to be closer to him, your arms also wrap around his neck. He pulls you to him by your middle, holding you firmly. You nuzzle into him, he’s warm and smells really good, he’s making you dizzy.
“You are really warm,” you breath out, words spoken into his skin. It almost feels like his temperature rises as you tell him.
His grip on you tightens momentarily, “You are torturing me.”
You don’t move from him, too comfortable and cosy to pull back, “How?”
Your breath tickles the sensitive skin on his neck and a suppressed shiver runs down his spine, a noise getting caught in his chest, he doesn’t reply to you though; choosing to ignore your question instead.
The sudden urge to cuddle further into his neck hits you but you don’t want to push his boundaries, so you start to pull away from him, mumbling out, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
“That’s not what I meant,” his hands move to hold your face, stilling you so you don’t pull away from him anymore.
Your heart feels like it might beat right out of your chest, Kuai is looking you over, eyes examining your face, flitting over your lips carefully. You want him to kiss you, especially since all your thoughts have been consumed by the memory of him kissing you, how overwhelming it was, how good it felt.
His thumb strokes high over your cheek bone, hands gentle with you and so warm, adding to the heat already resting under your skin. The look in his eyes is the same as last night, the way he looked at you just before your father knocked on your door, a little lost in you. He moves towards you and you prepare yourself for his lips on yours but he moves his head to your neck, nuzzling into your skin.
You feel a little let down at the lack of his lips on yours until you gasp at the way he has latched onto your neck, not sucking hard enough to leave a mark but enough to have you reacting viscerally to him – not that it seems all that difficult for him to pull reactions from you anyways.
He moves to another patch of skin, leaving open mouthed, wet kisses on your neck, nipping every now and again just to hear the small sounds you let out and the way you twitch against him. Your hands grab at his back for leverage and your head tilts to the side giving him more access. One of his hands grips at your flesh, fingers digging into your thigh and massaging, his other hand on your back, keeping you in place for him.
A sigh passes your lips at the way his tongue licks up the length of your neck, a shiver running down your spine at the feeling. He hums in satisfaction to himself at your involuntary reactions, enjoying every second of playing with you.
He pulls your shirt to the side to reveal your shoulder, his mouth kisses along it, giving the same treatment he gave your neck. Though, his nips last a bit longer, not afraid to leave marks where he knows no one will see, his teeth graze your skin and it has a small whimper leaving you. His chest rumbles with a groan, not quite reaching the air but vibrating through him all the same.
Your quiet whimpers turn into a surprised moan when he bites your shoulder, his teeth digging in momentarily before he retreats, resting his forehead on your shoulder, “I’m sorry, I got carried away.” His voice is strained, his mind clouded with the sounds you make, the feel of your soft skin, he’s realising slowly that maybe he should stop putting himself in these situations with you. Clearly, he does not possess much self-restraint when it comes to you, especially not when you are so willing.
“Don’t apologise, I don’t mind,” your voice is shaky, both from him and from your nervousness at admitting you liked it, you liked the way he’s marked you. The dull pain of his teeth biting your sensitive skin set you alight, your pussy throbbing for him.
He groans properly this time, his skin growing hotter against you, his hand on your thigh gripping for dear life. “Don’t tell me that, not right now,” his voice is still tense, fighting every urge he has to fuck your cunt with his tongue. Fighting the urge to taste every inch of your body.
You mumble out to him, “I like the way you touch me.”
“That did the opposite of help,” he grunts out, his forehead still resting on your shoulder, too afraid to move because he knows the look on your face will make him dizzy. His thoughts only filled with depraved images of you, of all the things he’d like to do to you and seeing the wet, needy look in your eyes… will break him.
You sit quietly and let him rest up against you, his breathing evening out slowly but surely. He seems to be trying very hard to be respectful but if you’re being honest with yourself, what you want him to do to you is anything but.
Taking pity on him, you decide not to push and instead offer him a way out, “Kuai, I think we have to leave soon.” It’s not a lie, you are both due back at the Shirai Ryu.
“I know,” he says, pulling his head away from you, he shuffles back a bit too, putting some distance between the two of you, “Again, I am sorry.”
“And again, I don’t need your apology, I said I liked it and I meant it,” you’re doing your best to be confident in yourself, “Now, let’s get going or we’ll be late,” you cement, moving off the bed and to your bedroom door.
He watches you walk across the room, a bit stunned by you, turning back you look at him and raise a brow, “Are you coming?”
“I’ll be with you in a moment,” he replies, still sitting, you shrug it off and walk out the door.
You feel light-headed, the sensation of his lips and teeth still linger on your skin, you really would’ve liked to have spent a few more moments alone to see what he would do to you. He looked equal parts fucked and hungry and the thought of him taking you how he pleases sends a thrill through your bloodstream. It’s really too bad but you suppose you will have new opportunities to be intimate with him now that you will be living with him.
Kuai catches up to you eventually and you spend the little time you have left with your parents, going over last-minute things about the wedding and saying your goodbyes. You hold your mother for a long time and when it comes to your father, you would really rather not interact with him but you won’t be seeing him for a few weeks so you hug him anyways, as much as you are angry with him, you will miss him. Though, you don’t hug him nearly as long as your mother and there is an air of contempt surrounding you, directed at him.
Before you leave, you take one last walk around your house and the gardens, knowing you won’t be back for quite a bit. It’s not forever, you will visit but you’d like to commit as much of it to memory now, before you leave. Kuai joins you on your walk, keeping you company, he’s nice to walk next to, his body radiates warmth just to your left.
“You will be handy to have in the winter, I don’t handle the cold all that well,” you hum out to him.
He smiles to himself, “I will keep you warm.”
“I will hold you to that.”
When it is finally time to leave, your parents see you off and then you’re gone from your childhood home, starting a new chapter with your future husband. It’s bittersweet, mostly because while you are excited to embark upon and explore this new relationship with Kuai, you are also still feeling upset at your situation, at the choice that was ripped from you. But like your mother said, all you have to do – is your best, that is more than enough.
₊ ⊹
Being back at the Shirai Ryu is… overwhelming or maybe nerve wracking, mostly because you won’t be leaving, this is going to be your home now… Oh gods, this is going to be your home now. Your heart feels like it’s seizing in your chest and you grab for Kuai standing next to you, hand bunching into the side of his shirt.
He notices and leans down to you, “Are you okay?”
You look up to him, your eyes round, you’re panicking and you don’t know how to stop. You can’t find the words to express that, though. The only response you’re capable of is scared eyes and a shake of your head, this is all starting to feel so real.
“I have you, I’m right here,” Kuai pulls you to him, engulfing your frame in a hug, his arms holding you securely, “Everything is okay.”
The pressure of being held is helping to calm you but you’re still feeling frightened, “Okay, w–we should go…we have things to take care of,” you can’t help the slight shake in your voice.
“It can wait,” his chest vibrates under your ear as he speaks, “I’m going to keep holding you until you are ready.”
You focus on your breathing and trying to slow it, attempting to take deep breaths. With your head pressed to Kuai’s chest, you can hear his heartbeat, it is steady and calm, his breaths are deep and even and you find yourself matching them. His calmness helps to steady you, he’s such a sturdy person, you’re glad he is here.
Eventually, you come back to yourself but you don’t want to pull away from him just yet. Moving your face, you press your forehead into his chest, “Thank you,” you mumble against him.
One of his hands moves to your head and strokes the back of it, “Do you feel better?”
“Marginally,” you breathe him in, he smells nice.
He pauses in thought for a moment before enquiring, “Have you ever panicked like that before?”
You sigh against him, “Not for a very long time.”
Panic attacks are not something you are a stranger to, your memories of them very unpleasant but you had worked hard on yourself to get to where you are now. You’ve not had a panic attack this bad in a long time, not since you were younger.
“If you find yourself panicking again… look for me,” his hand tilts your head up, so your chin rests on his chest, “I will drop everything to help.”
You nod at him, confirming that you will find him, if need be.
Before you pull back, you lean up as far as you can and press a soft kiss to his cheek. When you step away and look at him, you think you see a small pink tint flushing his skin. You don’t get to look at him long though, he grabs your hand and walks you through the village properly, taking you to his home.
You’re familiar with his house, you like it, it’s homey and light, it very clearly displays that a man lives in it but it’s still nice. Kuai is a tidy person for the most part, only forgetting cups in some of the rooms he walks into, he has a bad habit of making a drink, taking it with him somewhere, placing it in that room and then walking out of said room without the drink. It’s endearing and not all that bad since he usually remembers at some point and cleans up after himself.
He leads you down the hall to his spare room, “You can stay in this room.”
Nudging his side, you say, “You don’t want to sleep next to me?” You’re joking, mostly.
“You are welcome in my bed anytime you want, dear,” he’s leaned closer to you, his voice low as he says it, suggestive in nature. Before you have time to be embarrassed and stutter out an answer, he moves back and pats the top of your head, “If you do want to sleep next to me, you are more than welcome, I promise to keep my hands to myself.” His tone has an air of humour to it.
“Thank you,” you mutter out, stepping into the room to place some of your stuff down.
Kuai also follows in, putting the rest of your bags on the floor in the corner of the room, “I know it isn’t much but I hope you will be comfortable.”
“It’s perfect, Kuai, thank you,” you’re being earnest, the room is perfect, it has everything you’ll need and that’s more than enough.
Something on the nightstand catches your attention, “Did you get that for me?”
He comes up beside you, “I did, is it okay?”
The big smile that breaks out across your face can’t be helped, “It’s more than okay, thank you,” you lean your head onto his arm, your fingers looping in between his.
He has gotten you a plant, a small but beautiful one, it sits in an ornate pot on the nightstand, right by a window. The plant is green and leafy, some kind of trailing ivy, your mother would know the genus, species, order, family, etcetera. She really is a plant genius and in a small way it has rubbed off on you, in the way that you love plants, you’re not nearly as scientific about it all.
Kuai thinking to get you a plant… it fills you with joy, he’s continuously showing you how much he cares for you and every time he does, it gives you pause, your own feelings for him buzzing under your skin. It’s only now that you recognise and understand, that these feelings are not how you are meant to feel for a friend, you hadn’t considered liking Kuai like that until you had wanted to kiss him.
Being able to recognise them doesn’t make it easier though, if anything it makes it harder, having all these feelings for him and not really understanding how to express them. It certainly doesn’t help that your situation is not exactly… orthodox.
Looking to him, you can’t help the mass amounts of affection you are feeling for him right now, “Kuai, I really do mean it… thank you.”
“It’s just a plant,” his eyebrows scrunch at you, equal parts amused and confused by your heartfelt sentiment.
Your answer is simple, “I know.”
Kuai squeezes your hand before leaving the room, giving you the chance to settle in for a moment. You unpack a couple things and put your clothes into the dresser, you don’t really want to unpack though and so, instead, you end up flopping onto the bed and star-fishing out across the mattress. It’s a nice mattress, not too shabby, nothing to write home about but it’ll get you a good night’s rest.
A little less than half an hour passes by and Kuai comes back to check on you, only to see you sprawled out on the bed, “Done unpacking, already?”
Looking to him, you complain, “It’s boring and I don’t want to do it.”
He raises a brow to you, “How much did you do?”
“Most of my clothes and a couple other things,” shrugging, you add, “What can I say? I packed light.”
He wordlessly looks down to your other bag sitting in the corner, completely untouched.
You shake a hand at him dismissively, “I’ll unpack as I use things.”
“I foresee that annoying you,” he comments.
Scowling, you bite back, “Guess what’s annoying me right now.”
He fights back a laugh and instead asks, “In that case, are you ready to see the others?”
“Come help me up,” you beckon him over with a limp hand.
He lightly rolls his eyes at you but moves to help you up all the same, one of his hands grabbing yours and pulling you to your feet.
“Why, thank you very much,” you joke, patting his shoulder as you leave the room, you can hear the exasperated sigh he lets out from down the hall and it makes you stifle a laugh.
₊ ⊹
You’re meeting Harumi, Tomas and Raiden in a small garden area, it’s not fairing any better than your mothers, everything either dead or dull. It’s cold and you really would rather be inside, you pull your sleeves down over your hands, your fingers needing the small reprieve from the cold.
When you see Tomas he immediately pulls you in for a hug, happy to see you for the first time in a while, “It has been too long, how have you been?”
“I’ve been better,” you chuckle against him.
The hug lingers for a bit and Kuai clears his throat lightly from behind you, Tomas pulls away quickly at the sound. His hand lands on your head and pats you, “It will be nice having you here,” his smile is kind.
You appreciate his compassion, “Thank you, Tomas.”
Raiden moves in for a hug next, holding you and telling you lowly, so only you hear, “If you need anything, we are here for you.”
Pulling away you give him a look to convey gratefulness but don’t say anything verbally. Kuai moves to stand closer to you, his side brushing yours at how close he chose to stand. You appreciate it, the warmth is already radiating off him and you shuffle the tiniest bit closer to him, seeking more of his warmth.
Before you have a chance to make a note of Harumi’s absence, you hear her voice calling to you all, “I am here! Sorry, I got held up.” She moves in to hug you quickly, “It’s good to see you.”
You smile politely at her, feeling uncomfortable, from the cold and also from her, Kuai may not love her but you don’t know how she feels, “It’s good to see you, too,” you echo her sentiments.
Everyone starts chatting to one another, talking about their days and such, you really would like to listen but the cold is creeping into your veins and you feel like you might start shaking soon. Kuai must notice because he leans down to you, “Cold?”
“Very,” you press out, tone strained from the chill in your bones.
Kuai’s hands grab either side of your arms and rub up and down, trying to help warm you, “I think we should head inside,” he announces, “Tomas, is your house clean?”
Tomas looks up and away to think on it for a second before Raiden intervenes, “I cleaned earlier.”
Tomas turns to Raiden to thank him, but you don’t hear the rest of their conversation, Kuai has already begun walking the pair of you in the direction of their house, wanting to get you inside as soon as possible.
“You should wear more layers,” he notes.
“Maybe I wasn’t expecting to stand out in the open,” you huff out in reply.
You make it to Tomas’ house but the others haven’t caught up to you yet, so now you’re just cold in a different area. You move from foot to foot, trying to keep moving, hoping the movement will warm you up. Kuai watches on, amused by your fidgeting.
“This is your fault,” you grumble, “Fix it.”
He looks at you with a supressed smile on his lips and a puzzled look on his face, “And how am I meant to do that?”
“I don’t know! Warm me up… give me a hug or something,” you’re being a bit dramatic but you’re really cold.
He breathes out a small laugh but does hug you, his arms wrapping around you fully, holding you close to him. He’s so warm, in his arms is so much nicer than in the cold. You nuzzle into his chest, humming in contentment, “You’re so warm, so nice,” you mutter out against him.
A hand moves from your back to the side of your face, his palm warming your cheek, “Your face is very cold, you weren’t lying about not handling the cold well.”
“I would not lie about something like that,” his palm is large against your face, you close your eyes and lean into it, savouring his heat.
You don’t see him move but you feel his lips against yours, the warmth and sudden contact makes you gasp in slight shock. His lips aren’t being demanding, he’s being tame right now. The kiss is still enough to make you dizzy though, warm and full, you think maybe he just makes you feel like that. You kiss him back earnestly, your hands tugging at his chest.
As much as you want it, he doesn’t kiss you any deeper, not willing to risk being seen by the others in such a state. He also wants to kiss you more; he wants to see the look on your face after he kisses you stupid, he just doesn’t want the others seeing it too.
When he pulls back, he says, “Your lips also looked cold.”
“Dumb,” you retort, pressing your forehead to his chest again.
You can feel his quiet laughter move through him, “Did it help?”
“…Maybe.”
You don’t wait much longer for the others, you half expected Kuai to remove you from him when they got within eyeshot of you both but he doesn’t, he lets them see how he’s holding you, how you’ve latched onto him.
Tomas asks, “Are you okay?”
“Mm fine, jus cold, lemme inside,” you grumble out at him, words muffled by Kuai’s shirt.
When the door is finally opened you’re the first inside but you are disheartened when you realise it’s still cold in here too, “Why is it so cold in here?” You whinge out.
“It is not that bad,” Raiden comments.
“You’ll warm up,” Harumi laughs lightly, patting your shoulder on her way past you to the kitchen.
Tomas apologises to you with his eyes but you turn to Kuai and point at him, “Come here.” He pretends to be apathetic towards you, stoically moving to your side, “Just stay close by, please,” you ask, giving him your best and prettiest begging look.
“Mhmm,” he agrees easily, his expression extremely self-satisfied, loving how this has all been playing out.
Your hand reaches for his, trying to be as slick as possible, not really wanting the others to make comments on it. Kuai easily grabs your hand when he realises what you’re attempting to do, not bothered by the others and only really wanting to keep you comfortable. His large hand is heated and comfortable and while it doesn’t warm your whole body instantly, it sure does help a whole lot, his closeness is making this cold bearable.
The afternoon is spent all together, drinking tea and chatting, seeing everyone is nice, it’s been a while since you’ve spent some time with them and you had missed it. Kuai makes sure to stay close the whole time, just like you had asked him to, he truly does radiate heat. You think maybe he’s raising his own temperature just to keep you comfortable; you’ll have to remember to thank him for it later.
At some point, Kuai gets up to grab you another drink, you had told him you were fine but he was already standing and walking into the kitchen. Now that he had finally detached from you, everyone focuses their attention on you. Suddenly, you’re feeling very nervous under their eyes.
Tomas breaks the quiet, seemingly voicing what they all want to say, “What’s going on between you and Kuai?”
You don’t really know how to answer that, “I am not sure what you mean.”
“Are you two actually together now?” Harumi clarifies for you.
“We know he is marrying you because of your father,” Raiden adds.
Tomas directs his attention to Raiden, “Not just that, he loves her–”
Harumi gives Tomas a look, scolding him wordlessly for outing Kuai’s feelings for you.
The cold may not be a problem anymore, not with all the heat in your cheeks. You don’t answer straight away but your lack of a reaction to what should have been a bomb drop gives away your knowledge of Kuai’s feelings for you.
Harumi points at you, grinning, “You already know.”
“What? How did you know?” Tomas asks, surprised.
Raiden’s expression is unamused and sympathetic, feeling bad for you at their prying, “You do not have to answer, it is between you and Kuai.”
Tomas agrees with Raiden, “Yes, but also…” he leans in closer to you, over the table, “Tell us.”
You change your expression to an unreadable one, completely stoic as you lean in closer, “He told me.”
When Kuai walks back into the room, your drink in hand, he sees you and Tomas leaning in closer to each other across the table, he raises a brow at the pair of you, “What happened while I was gone?”
“Nothing,” they all chime out together.
You say nothing though, silently sitting back in your chair, Kuai moves to his seat next to you, sliding your tea across the table and then looks at you, waiting for you to tell him. Glancing around the table, you can tell Tomas is silently begging you not to tell him.
You turn to Kuai and smile, thinking of a lie to cover up the reason you were leaning over the table, “I was winning a staring contest against Tomas.”
“I doubt that,” he replies quickly.
Now you’re offended, “And what do you mean by that?”
“If you are going to lie, learn to do it well,” he teases.
“I can lie well,” everyone grumbles in disagreement and you gasp in faux hurt, “I can,” you insist.
“You really can’t,” Raiden says.
You frown at him in response.
“It’s only because you do not lie often, you are confrontational…” Harumi adds, her words trailing off when she looks to Kuai and see he’s shaking his head lightly at her, informing her of her poor word choice.
“I am not confrontational,” you pout out.
Tomas tries placating you, “Of course not, you are just… direct?”
Kuai changes the topic and places a hand on your shoulder, “Anyways, if you were going to pick a lie, you should have picked a believable one, you are very bad at staring contests.”
You look at him and scowl, squinting your eyes at him in anger, “I am not going to say anything because I am not confrontational.”
Everyone at the table is immensely amused by the way this has all unfolded, wearing smiles while you sit with your arms crossed, slightly annoyed at being called confrontational… again.
“It’s not a bad thing,” Kuai insists, a hand moving to pat your head, stroking you in an offer of comfort.
Everyone at the table agrees, trying to make you feel better.
Even though you disagree that you’re confrontational, it’s nice to be amongst friends. You let go of being upset pretty easily, mostly because you weren’t all that upset in the first place, you know they were just joking around.
Both you and Kuai don’t stay much longer after that though, leaving back to his house after another hour or so passes, it was good seeing them, you hadn’t realised how isolated you had been feeling at home until you spent some time around friends. Being here might be a good thing.
₊ ⊹
The night is cold and it’s keeping you awake, the blankets you have are not enough to stop the chill from creeping in or the shivers that run through your body. You think back to earlier today when Kuai offered his bed to you but you feel hesitant to take him up on it, that would be weird right?
Another shiver shakes your body and you decide you don’t care, you are cold and he is a fucking furnace, you are getting into his bed. You move quickly, not wanting to give yourself time to change your mind and also not wanting to feel the cold for too long.
You make it to his room, your footsteps rushed and quiet, you walk up to his side of the bed. Your hand goes for his shoulder, wanting to gently wake him but before you have a chance to call his name and shake him lightly, his hand shoots out and grabs yours.
It startles you and makes you jump, “Geez, sorry–”
“–Are you okay?” He questions, sitting up quickly to check you over.
You’re still shivering, the cold so much worse without a blanket on top of you, “I–I’m fine… never mind, don’t– don’t worry about it,” your words are stuttered slightly, your teeth chattering, “Sorry for wake–waking you, I am going back to bed.”
He frowns sleepily at you, his hand still holding yours, “You’re cold,” he observes.
Another shake wracks through you and he grumbles disapprovingly at it. His hands grab you, pulling your body to his, taking you with him as he lays back in the bed, before rolling to his side. You are laying down facing each other now, his warmth already so welcome. He grabs the blanket, bringing it up around you properly and then he’s shuffling closer, an arm slinging over your side.
His heat makes you hum, “Thank you.”
He only mumbles his response, mostly sounds and not really words. You press your body as close to his as possible, your cold feet tangling with his and he grunts at it, “Why are you so cold?”
“Because it is a cold night,” you mutter out, “We do not all have magical fire powers.”
“You going to be in my bed every cold night?” His voice is thick with sleep, eyes closed.
Pressing your head to his chest, you answer, “If it bothers you, then no.”
“It does not bother me,” his response is quick.
“Kuai?” he hums at you, telling you he’s listening, “Did you make yourself warmer today? When you were next to me?”
He’s quiet for a few beats, “…Yeah, I did.”
“Thank you.”
“You thank me a lot,” he comments.
“You do a lot of things that I am grateful for, I do not know how else to express that,” you sigh, your body finally relaxing, Kuai’s heat finally removing the chill that had settled into your bones.
Kuai holds back from saying the first things that enter his mind, his sleep addled brain immediately thinking of suggestive ways you could thank him, “You don’t have to thank me for the things I choose to do for you.”
“Of course I do,” you’re resolute in your reply because of course you do, who wouldn’t thank someone for their kindness, “Are you saying, that if I were to do something out of the kindness of my heart for you, you would not thank me?”
He immediately disagrees, he would thank you for anything you did for him, “No–”
“–Then why would I not thank you?” You cut him off, already knowing you have won and made your point.
“Just go to sleep,” he grumbles.
You laugh lightly, happy with your victory.
The conversation naturally dwindles though and you find yourself slipping into unconsciousness. With Kuai keeping you warm all night; it is probably one of the most pleasant slumbers you have had in a long time.
₊ ⊹
The past week has been good, you have been a bit home sick, longing for your mothers cooking and company but you have been settling in okay. The days aren’t boring, you have the company of Tomas, Raiden and Harumi. Most often, you have been with Raiden, he seems to have more free time so you spend the day with him more than the others, he is nice company. Though he is quiet and you feel annoying when you talk too much. Sometimes, leaving the interaction wishing you had just been quiet instead.
Kuai has been good to you, he has cooked for you a bit but you have also cooked some nights. Mostly because he is not the best at cooking, you are not going to tell him that though. You’re appreciative of everything he has done to help make you comfortable, you are not about to tell him that his cooking is not good. Because it is okay, it is edible, it’s just not… yummy.
He’s been out today, you would have gone with him but it’s too cold for you, even with him by your side. Some days you can bear it but not today, no, instead you have had a hot shower, like as hot as you could make it without burning yourself. Which you love, the hot showers help with the cold so much but with the cold air, you’ve been worried about your skin drying.
It’s annoying to do but you endure the cold so you can rub moisturiser into your skin, this isn’t so bad and quite pleasant in almost any other season but standing in only a robe with panties underneath, a leg up on the bed, rubbing moisturiser into your skin, during winter… is fucking freezing and you just wanna rug up and get warm.
You don’t even hear Kuai get home, not until he’s standing in your door frame and almost choking on his spit, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude,” he turns around, arguably not as quick as he could, eyes lingering on your leg perched atop the bed.
“You don’t have to be sorry, it’s fine, I’m only moisturising,” you dismiss, not really all that bothered by him seeing you like this. Though, you did think there was more time until he got back, you would have closed your door if you knew he was going to be home soon.
He turns back around, now that he knows you are fine with his presence and moves across the room to you, “How was your day?”
“Mmm, it was fine… cold, I was alone for most of the day though,” your hands rub at your thigh, massaging the cream into your skin.
Kuai’s voice sounds a little distant, “You did not see Raiden today?”
You only realise why he sounds so distracted when you look to him, his gaze set on your leg, intently watching the way your hands massage at your thigh, “If you like watching so much, why don’t you do it for me,” you joke, not really meaning anything by it.
“I will,” he replies quickly, eyes flicking up to lock on yours, “If you let me.”
Your brows upturn at him, a little confused by his eagerness but it’s not like you’re having fun doing it yourself, “Okay.”
He rounds the bed, moving in front of you; your leg comes down and he lowers himself onto the mattress, tapping your thigh once he’s sat, asking you to put it back up. You do, your foot resting on the bed again, right next to him. You were not expecting this position and it feels incredibly revealing.
He grabs the moisturiser off the bed and pumps some into his hand, eyes looking to yours to check if you’re really okay, before beginning to rub it into your calf. He starts lower on your leg, fingers pressing into your muscles, moving up and down. Eventually, he drags his palms up your leg, reaching your thigh, his fingers grip and pull at the skin and muscle, his hands travelling high up, the pressure feels good.
His hands are warm, the cold not a problem anymore, not with how he’s warming you, not with how intimate this feels, you honestly were not expecting this to feel so… arousing. The higher his hands travel the more your skin heats, seemingly Kuai is having the same problem, his hands growing hotter against your skin the more he rubs the moisturiser in.
Once it’s been absorbed, he asks you for your other leg, which you give, swapping sides for him. His eyes don’t leave your lower half, very carefully watching your thighs, you remember in the back of your head how much he seemed to like gripping your thighs while kissing you.
This time it looks like he’s grabbed more moisturiser, “Kuai, that’s too much, it will take forever to rub in.”
“That’s fine,” he mumbles out.
You insist, “No seriously, my leg can only get so moisturised.”
His eyes look up to yours, “I will find somewhere else to put it,” his eyes drag down your torso with his words, the implication causing blood to rush to your face.
He starts with your calf again, the product slipping all over your skin, he really had grabbed too much. It doesn’t stop him though, his hands move up to get it on your thigh and then his hands are rubbing into your skin again, trying to get it to rub in. Even though there is a surplus of product on you, he persists, massaging you the same as before. It feels good and as he rubs into one spot on your thigh, a small, gasped whine passes your lips.
His fingers are firm as they dig into you, his hands traveling higher again, the sounds that slip from you can’t be helped. You do supress them as much as you can, mostly stopping them in your throat. Kuai pushes all the moisturiser on your calf to your thigh before tugging you to sit in his lap.
You gasp lightly, surprised, “What are you doing?”
“Too much product, going to put in on your other thigh,” he states, his hands rubbing your other thigh again.
The way you’re straddling him is even more exposing than the position you were in before, the lower half of your robe split open now, your panties completely revealed to him. Luckily, your upper half is still covered, you might have fainted if he had your tits in his face while he massaged your thighs.
Kuai is very focused on your thighs though, his hands digging into both of them at the same time, massaging your inner thighs. You’re sensitive where he’s touching, especially like this, your hands hold onto his shoulders, repressed whines getting stuck in your throat. Your thighs twitch under his hands, he moves them further up, all the way to your hips. His hands slip under either side of your panties and rub into the skin of your hips.
Most of the product is absorbed now but Kuai’s hands still travel up and down your thighs, he’s setting you on the edge, his hands exploring you have you almost shaking on top of him. You’re so aroused at this point, pussy wet and needy and he’s only been massaging you.
He still doesn’t stop touching you and you end up pulling his head back by his hair, making him look you in the eyes, “Kuai, please.”
The look in your eyes makes him groan, he hadn’t realised how much of an effect he’d been having on you, mostly touching you for his own enjoyment. He pulls you to him so that you’re sitting in his lap, you twitch and pant at the feeling of his hard cock against your covered cunt.
“Sorry,” he mutters, “Got distracted.”
“Not that, I’m really wet now,” you tell him, not caring for apologies, instead wanting him to do something about it.
He moans at your confession, his hands gripping your thighs harder, his eyes dark and lustful.
“It’s your fault,” you accuse, accurately. “Fix it.”
“And how am I meant to do that?” He smiles cockily up at you.
You decide to snark back, “Are you worried you won’t be able to make me cum?”
His smile doesn’t falter, not falling for your bait, “Yes, I am, why don’t you show me how you do it?”
“Kuai, please,” you plead with him instead, eyes begging him to do something to you, “Do whatever you want to me just– please do something.”
“Whatever I want?” He checks and you nod your head, “And what if I want to do nothing? Leave you a needy mess like this? Then what?”
“Then I will cry,” you answer and you wish that upset him but he seems to be even more pleased at that comment, “You are mean.”
“I am not, you’re just soft,” he retorts.
You grind your hips down into his lap, your pussy rutting against his cock, he chokes on a sudden moan and grips your hips, stopping you from moving.
“Now who is mean?” He asks, voice strained.
“Still you,” it’s grumbled out with annoyance, you’re becoming sexually frustrated.
You decide to try and be meaner, one of your hands leaving his shoulder and dipping into your panties, running through your folds, when you hit your clit you moan and twitch atop of him. His eyes are watching you, small groans vibrating in his chest.
You pull your hand away from your pussy, showing him just how wet you are, fingers coated in your slick. His immediate response is to grab your hand and shove your fingers into his mouth, licking them clean, his mouth hot. You whine at him, he’s officially back to being meaner than you. You feel like a big mess, wet, sticky, needy– downright desperate for him.
He removes your fingers from his mouth, tongue licking at them a final time before pulling away, “That was mean,” he blames.
“Please, Kuai, I will take anything– just make me cum,” you’re back to begging.
He smiles evilly at you, “No.”
“Why not?” Your eyes actually well with tears, threatening to spill.
He holds the side of your face and coos, “Because having you wet and needy on top of me, is really doing it for me.”
“You are evil,” you pout at him.
“You seem to like it,” he’s still smiling at you, like he’s got you in the palm of his hand… and at the moment he does, if he’ll promise to get you off, you’d do just about anything.
He pulls your face to his, lips locking with yours, kissing you deeply. His tongue licking into your mouth, his warmth overwhelming you. His hand on your thigh digs in, holding you firmly. You moan into the kiss, your hips trying to grind down into him again, succeeding marginally. He gasps against you and lets you rut down. Enjoying the friction himself, just as aroused as you are, just better at hiding it. His cock twitches in his pants and you whine into the kiss, wanting so badly to be filled by him.
He pulls away from you, something occurring to him, “Has anyone ever made you cum?”
You’re panting against him, “I hadn’t even been kissed Kuai, take a guess.”
A large smile breaks out across his face, ecstatic at the fact that he’ll be the first person to make you cum, “Mmm, I will make you cum then.”
You perk up, “Really?”
“Yeah, I’ll have you cumming in your little panties for me,” he says it easily but the words embarrass you just as much as they arouse you.
His hands grip either side of your hips and begin dragging you up and down his covered cock, the head of it catching on your clit and making you keel over, your head landing in the crook of his neck, hands holding his shoulders.
Your hips help, moving back and forth with his pace, the friction delicious, it has you salivating for him. He’s gasping out groans under you, enjoying this just as much as you are. He moves his hands to your thighs, spreading you wider on him. His grip stays on your thighs, obsessed with them, with their softness.
You press a light and wet kiss to the skin on his neck, the feeling sends a shiver down his spine, his cock jumping against your cunt. His hands are hot against your thighs, the heat radiating off him suffocating. You muffle your moans into his neck, embarrassed by how whingey and desperate you sound.
Your panties are completely ruined, so slick they’re stuck to your cunt and slipping against the fabric of Kuai’s pants. He pauses for a moment and you whine against him, he shushes you in response. He only stopped to pull his pants down, still in his boxers but wanting less layers between you.
When your pussy comes back into contact with his covered cock, he groans out loudly, mind drifting far from him, if he thinks too hard about how wet you are or how desperate you are for him, he might end up fucking you stupid tonight.
He begins grinding you down into him again, losing his mind at the new feeling, of how much better it feels without his pants on. Without the extra layer, his cockhead catches on your pussy hole through your panties and he groans like he’s been gut punched. You wiggle down on him, seeking penetration that won’t happen, not with all the layers.
You sob into his skin, so horny and wet, you’re drooling onto his shoulder and neck, saliva coating his skin. He keeps rutting you down on top of him, desperate to have you cumming for him. His mind only filled with how you must sound when you finish, how you’ll sound moaning his name.
You can’t think of anything, only thinking of his cock rubbing through your folds and catching on your clit. Every other thought you might have, dying before you are aware of it. You’re shaking against him, getting close to your end, your stomach tensing, cunt fluttering around nothing. Your whines breaking off into nothing, choking on all the sounds you want to make for him.
Kuai notices, “So close aren’t you? Fuc–”
He gets cut off by you biting him, your teeth digging into the skin on his shoulder, you’ve bit him as you cum, his words pushing you over the edge. Your first, thoughtless response being to latch onto him, a way to try and ground yourself. His cock spasms at the feeling, his own orgasm rocking through him, his nails bite into your skin, holding you to him firmly as you both finish at the same time.
He groans loudly, his orgasm shocking him, not expecting to cum so suddenly. You’re limp against him, your teeth no longer imbedded into his shoulder. You pant and shudder against him, aftershocks wracking through your body. He pulls you back, only because he needs to see the look on your face and when he does, he smiles brilliantly at you, overjoyed by your expression.
Your eyes are all gooey, cheeks tear stained, you look like an absolute mess for him and he thinks if he hadn’t just cum, he could cum just from seeing you like this. He tucks you back into his shoulder and holds you to him, letting you regain your strength before trying to move either of you.
You feel dizzy and lost, “It’s never felt that good before.”
“Mmm just you wait,” he retorts humorously.
You still twitch against him slightly but you pull yourself back and press a full kiss to his lips, your tongue licks into his mouth, his hand grabs at your face, letting you kiss him how you please, a moan passing from him to you. You pull back from him properly, sitting in his lap looking at him, feeling a little bashful now.
“What was that for?” He asks, eyes glassy.
You smile sweetly at him and say, “That was a thank you.”
He smiles affectionately at you, his eyes dopey and in love, “You should always thank me like that.”
You bop him on the nose with a finger, “Okay.” Apparently, an orgasm makes you agreeable and happy.
He shakes his head at you in amusement before asking, “Have you eaten yet?”
“Nope, waited for you.”
“Let’s eat then,” he says, picking you up as he stands.
You squeal at him as he carries you down the hall like that, you’re stuck to him, clinging on for dear life, scared you’ll fall but also trusting that he won’t drop you. The whole house is filled with your shared laughter.
₊ ⊹
The next couple weeks are more of the same, you spend a lot of time in Kuai’s bed, seeking his warmth most nights but nothing happened between the two of you. He seemed to be trying to control himself better around you, it would have bugged you but things had honestly been busy. With the wedding approaching fast, you had other things to worry about and your anxieties started peaking their ugly heads again.
And now that the day is here, you feel wracked with nerves the whole time, it hadn’t been so bad… not in the beginning. There were a few hiccups, like the awkwardness between yourself and your father, you’re still holding resentment against him, especially since his motivations remain unknown to you.
Your father had seemed… sombre, when no one was looking there was a sadness looming around him, you aren’t sure what exactly could be the reason for it and you would ask but he wouldn’t tell you either way. He’d only say that it is rude to ask someone why they look run down.
There was one point in the day that you tried talking to him but he had only brushed you off, giving you shallow pleasantries and congratulations. It hurt, to be pushed aside when you had concerns for him, you think the least he could have done was entertain a polite conversation with you but he was not at all interested in talking with you, not in the way you needed him to.
You had also tried asking your mother about your father but like you predicted, she gave away nothing. Instead, she focused on you, how you were feeling and settling, how you were going with Kuai. It was nice to see her, to talk with her properly, you have been missing her company. You also tried a few more times to get her to tell you what was wrong but she’s a tough nut to crack and she continued to assure you nothing was wrong, maybe you are looking too hard for things that aren’t there.
Kuai had been with you most of the day, trying to stay by your side and make sure you felt okay but he had people coming to talk to him a lot, he eventually got pulled away from you, not too long ago actually. Now, he’s probably stuck in a conversation somewhere; one you do not care to stick around for.
This whole day has been uncomfortable and you’re nervous, the future in front of you now and you have no idea what happens after. What changes now? You are aware nothing has actually changed, only the legality of your betrothal to Kuai but things still feel scary, everything feels scary and you feel small. It feels like you may be having a panic attack again.
You scan the crowd for Kuai but fail to find him and instead rush to find a quiet place you can hide for a moment, somewhere you can calm your thoughts and focus on your breathing. It doesn’t help though, now you’re alone with your thoughts, the quiet a welcome change from the overstimulation of being around people but not helping in slowing your thoughts.
All your anxieties are still there, just somehow louder without all the other noises happening around you. You start hyperventilating, now freaking out about not being able to calm down. And you’re frustrated, you have enjoyed your time here for the past month, you feel less isolated, you feel cared for, Kuai makes you feel cared for but you are not coping with the change well, you are not coping with your fathers betrayal well. You are not coping well, not right now. Right now, it feels like the world is caving in around you.
Tears are streaming down your face and you wish they would stop, it will mess with the makeup you’re wearing and then people will have questions, oh gods, what if they have already noticed your absence? What if people are looking for you, what if someone finds you here like this, all sad and pitiful… you might die on the spot, from mortification.
Footsteps can be heard nearby, getting closer to you, it has you holding your breath and standing stock still, hoping the bushes and pillar will be enough to hide you from whoever is in the area. They keep approaching though, their steps seem rushed, like they’re looking for someone, great, they’re probably looking for you.
Kuai rounds the pillar and sees you, he rushes out a sigh of relief, happy to have found you, “I have been looking all over for you, are you okay?” His hands cradle your face and his thumbs gently rub the tears off your cheeks, attempting to fix your makeup.
“I couldn’t find you, I did look,” your voice is shaky, threatening to cry again.
Truthfully, you feel relieved to see him too, his presence immediately bringing you a kind of comfort you hadn’t realised was gone until he was back beside you. You had been leaning on him all day to help keep you together more than you thought, you knew he helped make all of this easier but you hadn’t realised just how much him being near helped you.
“Come here,” he pulls you to him, holding you in a hug, keeping you safe, “Do you want to talk about it?”
You don’t really but you’ll try your best to tell him anyways, “I got scared, nothing changed but it also feels like everything has changed. I am worried about my relationship with my father, I feel betrayed by him… and I guess… I have not been coping as well as I thought I had been.”
“You have been doing remarkably well, considering the circumstances,” his hands rub your back, “You have been doing your best, you have been adjusting as well as anyone can, I am in awe of your resilience, dear.”
You sniffle out, “I worry that I am becoming a burden to you, Kuai.”
“You could never burden me,” he leans down and presses a small kiss high on your cheekbone, when he pulls back he looks you in the eyes, his gaze intense and sincere, “I love you.”
The reminder of his open love for you takes your breath away, he does not repeat it often, only when he thinks you have forgotten it. Only when he thinks you need to hear him say it, he needs you to know how highly he thinks of you, how beautiful you are to him, how amazing you have been throughout all of this.
You never know how to reply to him, saying thank you feels dumb, so you kiss him. Leaning up to him, you press your lips to his gingerly, careful and tentative as you do. You hadn’t kissed during your ceremony, it’s not tradition but in the quiet area you have found, where it is just the two of you, you share a soft kiss, one filled with your appreciation for him and his love. Parting is harder than it should be, every time you kiss him, you hope it will last just a little bit longer.
“You are my husband now,” you comment.
He smiles softly at you, “That I am.”
You both head back to where everyone else is, once you’ve calmed down, he stays with you the whole time and offers you reassuring words. You would have loved nothing more than to go home and be done with the day but you soldier on and get through it.
It is uneventful, more of the same but this time Kuai makes sure to stay close by you, a part of him touching you the whole time. His hand always on you somewhere, whether it be on your back, shoulder, hand, knee, he’s there and he’s making sure you remember it.
Ultimately, he is what gets you through today and you are so grateful to him.
₊ ⊹
After everyone leaves, you’re back at his house… well your house too, it feels a little weird to say though, especially since you feel like you don’t contribute much. His house has been feeling more homely but you can’t tell if that’s his house or him, you think you may just be feeling at home with him.
You shower first, needing to get out of everything and into something comfortable, when you’re finished, you head to Kuai’s room. His door is open and he’s lying on his bed waiting for the shower to be free.
“I am done,” you walk to his side and his hand grabs yours, squeezing once.
He hums at you, “Thank you,” his form moves off the bed, his body brushing up against yours as he slips by you to head in the direction of the shower.
You’re feeling a little odd, you could just go to bed, or even get into his bed and sleep off today but you know people usually celebrate their marriage. It may not be a ‘traditional’ marriage but you would like to sleep with him, he sets your skin on fire, he fills your head with dirty thoughts and… well, you don’t really have any good excuse… he makes you horny and you want him to fuck you.
Sighing, you crawl onto his bed and into the spot he was just in, it’s still warm and cosy. You sit and think about things as you wait for him to come back but all you’re really thinking about is how much you’d like to be filled with him, how hot his skin must get, how vocal he may be. No matter how hard you try to think of something else, your mind wonders back to him and his toned body under you, or above you. Your thighs subtly rub together, seeking friction.
When Kuai come back into the room, he’s wearing his pants low on his hips, he’s shirtless, chest bare and still has some water trailing his abs, his hair down and damp, you can’t help the way you stare at him. You try, you try really hard not to make it obvious but by the way he raises a brow at you, you know you’ve been caught red handed.
You speak before he has the chance to be mean, “Aren’t you cold?”
He hides his smile at your question, “I run hot,” he notes, obviously.
You feel silly, “Right…”
“Was today okay?” He sits down facing you, a hand landing on your knee.
You’re actively having to fight off the shiver that wants to shake your whole body, “It was fine, with you beside me.”
He hums at you in acknowledgement, his hand gripping your knee once before pulling away.
Telling him you want to sleep with him is hard, you haven’t actually tried saying anything yet but he picks up that something is bothering you.
“Did you have something you want to ask me?” He raises his brows to you, encouraging you to ask what you want to.
Biting the bullet, you decide to be direct, “Don’t we… have to consummate our union… or whatever?” You feel very awkward and you’re having a hard time looking him in the eyes.
“We don’t have to,” he replies.
You feel dejected, like he has outright rejected the idea of sleeping with you, “You don’t want to?”
He’s quick to answer, “I want to,” he looks at you, eyes dark, “You know I want to.” His gaze looks like there is a fire raging inside, feelings for you burning just under the surface, “But only if you want to.”
“I want to,” you’re fiddling with your own hands, nervous, “It’s just that, it’d be my first time.”
“Maybe we should wait,” he offers.
“For what?” your brows upturn at him, “I want it.”
He closes his eyes to think for a second, trying to be respectful even though you’re in his bed, asking him to fuck you, on your wedding night. His focus is on trying to keep enough blood in his head so he can think. Not realising that you’ve shuffled closer to him, not until your hand reaches for his wrist and shoves his hand down your panties. You’re resting on your knees for him, legs spread just enough for his fingers to slip through your pussy lips.
He groans, like he’s been punched in the stomach, “That’s just not fair.”
“Trying to show you I want it,” you mutter out, bashful.
He’s weak, how could he resist you when you’ve pushed his fingers to your cunt, your very wet cunt. He drags the tips of his fingers through your folds, spreading your slick all over yourself, you gasp in response and grab onto his shoulder, his skin hot under your hand.
He focuses on where his hand is under your panties, wishing you weren’t wearing any, “I can tell you want it; I still have reservations.”
“Is it because– hah–” you’re cut off by his fingers carefully circling your clit, your nails lightly dig into his skin, “–is it because –mmph– I’m a virgin?” You gasp out, wanting to understand his hesitation.
“Partially,” he hums, his other hand moves to grip your thigh, trying to stop your twitching, “Also because I like your neediness for me, wonder how far I could push you.”
You frown at him, thighs trembling at the stimulation he’s providing, “That would be cruel–”
“–It would be, yes.” He cuts you off only to agree. He looks to your eyes, they’re blown out and glazed and as much as he enjoys taunting you, he would also enjoy getting his dick wet.
You can’t help the way your pussy flutters at his words, you wish you didn’t enjoy how mean he seems to be when it comes to the bedroom. He’s so very often gentle with you and the change in attitude when it comes to this topic affects you in a way you can’t really explain. He knows though, especially since your cunt got so much slicker at his teasing.
He pulls his hand away from you and you whine at him, “I am not going to fuck you–”
“Why–”
He shoves his fingers covered in your wetness into your mouth, effectively getting you to shut up, “Because…” his eyes are set on how your lips wrap around his fingers, on the way your tongue slips between them, licking him clean, “…I said so.” He doesn’t offer anymore explanation.
He pulls his fingers from your mouth slowly, enjoying the view of your lips around them. Once he’s able, he pulls you to him by the back of your neck, his lips harshly meeting with yours. His tongue licks into your mouth, tasting you, he’s fervent, insistent. Mouth hot and the kiss wet, you can only let him kiss you how he pleases and whine into him, he’s overwhelming you and not giving you much of a chance to do anything else.
His hands push at your robe, wanting you to take it off, it slips from your shoulders and pools around your waist. His lips don’t part from yours but his hands move to grab at you, palming your breasts, massaging at you. His fingers pinch at your nipples, rolling them, you break the kiss, moaning louder than you were expecting to.
The sound embarrasses you and your hand moves off his shoulder to cover your mouth, Kuai grunts in disapproval but continues playing with your tits, focus solely on them. You gasp and whine from beneath your palm, your body jerking in response to him. You press your chest forward into his hands more, his eyes are dark and glazed, lost in how big his hands look on your tits.
You pull your hand away, enough to pant out, “Kuai –hah– I can’t– please, I need more.”
“Wants and needs are not the same thing,” his voice is low and gravelly, eyes still on your tits.
You push his hands away from you and stand up on wobbly legs, your robe falls to the floor properly and you push your panties down your legs, kicking them off your feet. Kuai is in awe of you, eyes trailing every inch of your body.
“I know that, and I meant what I said,” you huff at him, you passed want a while ago, you need him now. His hands grab for you but you step away, staying just out of reach, “I need you, please.”
He nods at you quickly, “Mhm whatever you want, just come here.”
You move within arm’s reach of him again and he pulls you down to the mattress, your head lands on the pillows and you laugh in shock. He leans down over you and presses his lips to yours, kissing you quickly. And then he gets off the bed to pull his pants down, freeing his hard cock. He’s large and thick and you think that taking him is going to be… a challenge for sure.
You must look concerned by his size because he says, “Calm down, I meant it when I said I wasn’t fucking you.”
You grumble at him, “I could take it.”
He chuckles, “I am sure you could, not tonight though.”
You’re confused as to what’s happening, “Then what are we doing?”
He crawls back onto the bed, over top of you, and nuzzles his face into the side of yours. His lips press light kisses to your skin before pulling back to look at you smugly. “There are other ways to get off,” he states, matter-of-factly.
“But I want to be…” you trail off before mumbling out, “…full.”
His head drops to your shoulder, and he grumbles lowly about how you’re trying to kill him, or how you’re really testing his patience. Taking a deep breath, he looks back to you and says, “Roll over, onto your side.”
“What? No please?” You joke.
He squints at you and then just flips you onto your side himself, he tucks in behind you, essentially spooning you. His hard body presses into your back, he holds one of his hands out to you, “Spit.”
You do as you’re told without thinking twice, immediately spitting into his palm. He sighs quietly and takes his hand away from you, soft clicking sounds can be heard behind you and Kuai groans out, his head landing on your shoulder. He fists at his cock for a bit, getting it slick for you.
“Keep your thighs closed,” he directs, deep voice by your ear.
His cock slips between your thighs, spreading your pussy lips open on his thick length. You gasp at the feeling of his dick running along your cunt, the head lightly grazing your clit as he slips against you. He moans into your shoulder at the warmth of your pussy, his cock jerking at how wet you are for him.
He breathes in as he pulls back, his dick slick with you. He pushes in between your thighs and you gasp out a whine at how his tip hits your clit. Kuai starts a steady pace, thrusting backwards and forwards, his dick sliding against your pussy. Looking down, you watch the way the head of his cock pokes out between your thighs, you clamp them together as much as you can and Kuai’s hips stutter, a moan pulled from his chest.
You’re leaking against him, his dick sliding easily through your folds, his breath sputters at the plushness of your thighs, at the slick of your creamy cunt. The tip of his cock oozes thick globs of precum, his arousal driving him insane. His hand grips onto your hip, holding you still and needing to ground himself.
Your hips move with him, your need for him heightening. He’s so hard and pressed right against you, it would be so easy for him to change his mind and push inside. Moans and whines spill from you freely, your hand reaches back and tangles into his hair. Kuai presses his head to your shoulder, his pants and moans right next to your ear.
“Kuai –hah– can’t you just –nngh– put it in,” your eyes burn, like the pleasure might make you cry.
He groans into your neck, “No –nngh– I couldn’t –hah–”
He is right, with how big he is and the fact you’ve not had sex before, there is no ‘just’ putting it in. But even though he’s right, your horny brain doesn’t care, “Please~”
“No,” he bites back, “Now stop asking or I’ll stop.”
You whinge at him and even though you want to keep protesting, you think better of it, knowing he definitely would hold off on his own pleasure just to torture you further. Kuai mouths at the side of your neck, getting carried away and sucking at your skin, no doubt leaving behind some dark marks.
He’s getting lost in feeling of your wet cunt and soft thighs, “You’ve got such –hah– soffft skin –fuck– pussy is fucking dripping –nngh– for me.”
His slightly slurred and growled out words drive you mental, moans getting stuck in your chest from how you try to stuff them down. You rock your hips back against him, desperation clawing up your spine.
Kuai’s hand pins your hip to the bed, holding you down, wanting you to stay steady so he can fuck through your thighs how he pleases, “Be good and stay –hah– still.”
Your cunt jumps against him, you’re throbbing for him, your thighs slick and a complete mess, both from his precum and your arousal. You’re frustrated from the lack of fullness, your pussy begging for his cock.
“Kuai~ please –hah–” you let yourself trail off, remembering his threat.
His thrusts speed up, the glide easy, meeting no resistance with the complete mess made of your lower half. You can feel the growls in Kuai’s chest and hear the gasping noises he’s making against your skin, his tongue licks at your neck before he whispers to you.
His voice is low and grumbly, broken only by gasped moans, “Bet you have the tightest little cunt –nghh– probably have me cumming just from filling you –hah–”
You tug at his hair and he moans into your ear the sound has your pussy quivering for him, all the sounds he makes sets you on fire. His hot skin holds you close to him, making you feel faint. And then his mouth is back on your skin, leaving behind more marks.
The sounds you try to stuff down drive him crazy, you’re trying so hard to be quiet but can’t help but make noises and it’s not only boosting his ego, it’s making his cock throb for you. He has half a mind to cave and fuck you open on his cock right now.
Kuai’s cognizance is far from him, his thoughts only focused on your slick cunt and thighs on his cock. He slurs out to you, “You’re such a –hah– pretty little thing –mmph– my pretty little thing –nghh– my pretty little wife.”
You gasp and twitch against him, hearing him refer to you as his wife has your head buzzing, something primal in you loving being referred to as such. Your stomach fills with butterflies, his words doing things to you that you don’t really have the wherewithal to understand right now.
You’re getting close to finishing, your pussy twitches and your stomach clenches, your hand in his hair holding on tighter. He groans into your neck, his own end sneaking up on him. He’s losing his mind at everything, everything about how he’s fucking your thighs right now has him going crazy.
His dick spasms between your legs and his teeth bite into your neck, the feeling a shock, it runs down your spine to your cunt. The blunt pain pushes you off the edge and you cum on Kuai’s cock, choked moans pulling from your chest. You gasp and whine, tears pooling in the corner of your eyes. Your mind is gone as you cum on him, the only thing slightly grounding you is the feeling of Kuai’s hot skin and his tongue as he licks at the bite mark he left behind.
The way you jolt against Kuai and how your thighs seem to clamp tighter have his own orgasm slipping from him. His cum landing on your thighs and his bed. He groans loudly into your skin as he cums and he finds himself wishing so badly that he had cum inside you. He nips at your skin some more as he comes down, enjoying the way you jerk against him as he does.
The hand he had on your hip wanders over your body now that he doesn’t have to hold you down, he pulls at the skin on your thighs, at your tits, and when he reaches your face he wipes the drool away from the corner of your mouth.
He checks you over, “You with me?” You hum out to him in confirmation, and he adds, “Good, cause I’m not done with you.”
His words send a thrill through you, what else could he possibly do to you?
He pulls his cock from between your thighs carefully and then pulls you to lay on your back, he positions himself over you. You’re so pliable now that you’ve cum, letting him manoeuvre you however he pleases. His hands push your thighs open and he’s breathless at the sight, you’re a mess, slick and cum coating your thighs and cunt. He groans out at it, his mouth pooling with saliva, he wants to put his mouth on you so bad.
His fingers drag along your skin, collect what cum he had gotten on you, and then his fingers are pressing through your folds. He’s playing with your pussy, coating it in his cum. A single finger prods at your entrance and slowly slides inside. The grip you have on his single finger almost has him going feral, the fact you wanted him to fill you with no preparation makes him nearly laugh.
You gasp at how his finger has pushed into you, not expecting it but enjoying it, finally having something inside. He gently moves it in and out, slowly fucking you, your thighs try to close at the stimulation but Kuai body between your legs stops them from getting too far. His free hand moves to your thigh and holds you open, his gaze greedy for how open you are for him right now.
He can’t stop thinking about how you would feel split open on his cock, how you would leak around him, how tight you must be and how fucked full he’d make you feel. His skin is buzzing, his cock hard for you again. His finger retreats and you whine at him, the sound you make has his heart racing, you sound so fucked out and cute.
“You make such cute little noises,” he hums out to you.
“Why–”
He shushes you, “Just lay there and let me play with you.”
Gods, he’s going to kill you, your cunt jumps at his words and your stomach twists in knots. The things he has been saying tonight have you gnawing at the bit, wanting him to stop because it’s embarrassing and also never wanting him to shut up because it’s arousing you.
Kuai’s finger collects more of the cum he left on you and then he pushes it inside your cunt, he’s finger fucking his cum inside you and it’s going to make you faint. His finger crooks up inside you and your hands move to cover your mouth, loud moans threatening to rip from you.
Kuai only smiles at your reaction and hums, “Can try and be as quiet as you want, won’t work.”
Your pussy clenches down on him at the sound of his voice and his smile grows larger, he’s enjoying watching your reactions to him, loving the control he has as he fingers you. His pace has been steady and consistent but with his own need to see you cum clawing up his spine his hand speeds up, fucking you faster and harder, his head filling with images of you cumming for him.
He’s thinking about how tight your little cunt will grip him as you finish and how you would feel cumming on his cock. His eyes are glazed and blown, fucked out and he’s not even fucked you. You’re gasping underneath your hands, eyes rolling to the back of your head and spilling tears. The sight has Kuai enamoured, relishing in the way you’re crying over his single finger.
He crooks his finger up to hit a specific spot inside you continuously and it has you cumming with a suppressed shout. Kuai was right, you grip him tight as your cunt spasms around him, your body twitches and your thighs quiver.
As he pulls his finger from you, all your slick and the cum he pushed inside oozes from your convulsing pussy hole. He tuts at you in mock disapproval, you’re not really sure what he’s referring to though, you’re still panting, trying to catch your breath after your second orgasm.
When you’ve regained some of your faculties, you look to Kuai and see the absolutely fucked out look on his face. His eyes glassy and wet, focused on your pussy, his cock fully erect again. He doesn’t look all there at all, like his thoughts are a million miles away from him.
“My pretty little wife has made a mess all on my sheets,” his words are slurred together, “gonna have to clean it up,” his hands run along the insides of your thighs, “You gonna let me clean it up?” He finally looks to you, his eyes bordering on feral.
You nod shakily at him, words failing you right now.
At your approval he’s immediately shuffling between your legs, you don’t know what you were expecting but you’re shocked when he gets on his stomach and pushes your legs open as wide as they will go before licking up the whole length of your pussy. Your stomach jumps in delight and shock, your hand moves back to your mouth to cover the moan that he pulls from you.
He’s lapping at you like a starved animal, not really cleaning any mess but more… making an entirely new one. Your head is up in the clouds, not able to focus on anything but how it feels to have his tongue lick at your pussy. His mouth then suddenly latches onto you, his tongue entering your hole and drinking down all of your cum.
His face presses as close to your pussy as he can possibly get, his nose up against your clit makes you clench down on his tongue and a loud groan rumbles from deep in his chest. The vibrations of the noise he makes has you crying out, your hand doing little to stop it. Kuai’s hands hold onto your thighs, gripping them tighter at the sound you make.
You’re practically panting for him, your hips rise and fall, attempting to ride his face. He holds you down, his mouth fervent on you, hot and wet. The noises that fill the room are embarrassing and obscene. Lewd, wet noises of your cunt and his mouth enter your head and you twitch in response, your skin heating at the realisation that it’s your pussy making those noises.
Your hand is getting damp from how you drool at Kuai’s tongue in your pussy, eventually you can’t take it and need something to grip onto. Your hand moves from your mouth and tangles in his hair, the other gripping at the pillows above you. The moans and whines he pulls from you are falling freely now, unobstructed and just as embarrassing to you as your messy cunt.
When you tug on his hair accidentally, he groans into your pussy, his tongue moving more desperately. Kuai’s hips rut into the mattress below, not able to stop himself from seeking friction. His head fully invaded by you and your cunt. He’s almost whining into your pussy, obsessed with how fucking slick you are, how you seem to just keep getting slicker.
His nails bite into the skin on your thighs where he’s holding you open; you’re shaking like a leaf for him. Your whole-body trembles with how sensitive you are and he’s happily tongue fucking you through it. He doesn’t stop making small noises of pleasure as he licks into you, his hips still rutting down into the bed.
Your whines hit a higher pitch, your hands grabbing and letting go before grabbing again, your orgasm is on the tip of your tongue, or on the tip of Kuai’s tongue and it feels like too much. Your limbs want to flail but Kuai is holding your legs still, not at all deterred from getting you to finish.
“Kuai~ It’s –hah– too –mmph– much,” you cry out to him.
You don’t know if he chooses to not acknowledge you or if he’s so far gone that he doesn’t notice, but he continues tongue fucking you into the next dimension. The relentlessness has you crying now, tears falling freely at the overstimulation. You’re shaking so much and it truly feels like you need to run away from the feelings you’re being given. But even if you try to wiggle away, it doesn’t work, Kuai uses barely any of his strength to hold you still. He grunts into your cunt in disproval, the most communication he’s given since he first put his mouth on you.
A gasped whine is let out as you cum, your pussy spasms around Kuai’s tongue and he moans out at it, nearly whining into you again. His tongue fucks you through it and his nose presses to your clit, he shakes his head lightly to encourage the stimulation. He drinks down your cum while groaning, enjoying himself immensely, ecstatic that he’s finally gotten to shove his tongue inside you.
He pulls back from you, not wanting to overstimulate you more than he already has. You don’t even feel conscious anymore, vision dark and unfocused. The thing that brings you back to your body is Kuai biting at your inner thighs, he’s leaving marks on you, teeth biting in hard enough that an impression of his teeth will be left behind for a while. You let him do it, not really present enough to move anyways and even if you were, you like the marks he’s left behind, you like how possessive he seems to be in bed. It screams to that primal part of your brain.
Kuai pulls back to look at you and the marks he’s left on your thighs, he smiles to himself, full of pride. His hands gently smooth over your thighs before he moves up the bed to lay next to you, he pulls you to your side and hold you to him. You close your eyes, your body soft and pliable, like a ragdoll.
“Are you still with me?” He asks.
Without opening your eyes, you retort, “Are you?”
He chuckles at you but is also sheepish, “Yeah, sorry… I got carried away.”
“Don’t apologise, I liked it,” you mumble out to him, “a lot.”
He presses a kiss to your forehead, “Good.”
You remember that he was hard again and open your eyes to look at him, “Do you need me to… are… do you need help?” You have a hard time phrasing your question.
He looks away from you, his cheeks a light pink, “I am fine…”
You object, “But you didn’t–”
“–I did.”
Your eyes widen in understanding and then you feel incredibly hot in the face, “Oh.”
He hums at you and changes the topic, “Are you satisfied?”
“For now,” you smile cheekily at him.
He leans down to you and presses a soft kiss to your lips, “I think… you might be trying to kill me.”
“I think it’s the other way around,” you raise a brow to him.
“Mhmm,” he dismisses before leaning in to kiss you again.
His lips are gentle and he’s being tender with you, kissing you sweetly after making you cum for him three times. His warm hand skates along your skin, the action raises your skin and you press closer to him, seeking his warmth.
He parts from you and pulls the blanket over the two of you, your hand tangles in his hair again, this time brushing it with your fingers, playing with it mindlessly. You end up scratching at his scalp lightly and he melts for you, enjoying the feeling. You play with his hair for a while but everything is heavy, including your eyelids.
You pull your hand from his hair and instead wrap it around him, tugging him close, he tickles your back as you fall in and out of sleep, you aren’t sure how long he stays awake for but wrapped in his arms, warm and content, you drift to sleep not too long after he presses a small, final kiss to your lips.
₊ ⊹
A/N: Thank you for reading the whole thing, holy cow !! I hope you enjoyed it and I hope it fulfilled everyone’s expectations. As always my inbox is open for questions, thoughts and feelings, don’t hesitate to slide in. I hope everyone has a beautiful day/night and I will now be preparing to write just friends part 2 !! <33
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irafuwas · 8 months
Text
some thoughts on how lilia views love
I’ve been watching through the Stitch event and there’s a bit of dialogue Lilia says that unfortunately made me Think, so I wanted to gather my babblings here.
This post contains spoilers for: Book 7, Tsumsted Wonderland 2, Lost in the Book with Stitch, Spectral Soiree/Endless Halloween, and Tamashina Mina
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After spending the day fighting off Gantu’s robots, scavenging for food, and exploring the island, the boys rest for a bit in an old cottage they found. Lilia wants to take the opportunity to spruce up the cottage and make it more resort-like while they’re enjoying this “vacation”, and Riddle and Jack are both surprised and a bit peeved to hear him say this.
Riddle: Don’t you want to find a way off this island as soon as possible, Lilia Senpai? Malleus Senpai, Silver, and Sebek… Everyone at Diasomnia must be worried sick about you right now. I should think you’d want to assuage their concerns a tad bit faster!
Lilia: …Thing is, I trust them.
Riddle: You trust them?
Lilia: Mm-hmm. Knowing them, no doubt they understand I’m safe and sound and having a good time right now. Malleus and the others know I’m not the type of guy who’d get in a pickle over something as trivial as this. And that’s because they know me very, very well – just like family!
(snipped)
Lilia: It’s truly wonderful having people in your life who trust you and wish the best for you - and for whom you do the same in return - no matter how far apart you may be.
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When you take this dialogue and look at in isolation of this event, then it’s a wonderful thing to hear Lilia say. He trusts his boys and they trust him - because they’re family, and that’s what families do. It’s always great to hear the characters themselves acknowledge their strong bonds with each other, and I thought it was really cute how Stitch got so happy to hear Lilia talking about his Ohana.
But when you take what he said and consider the broader story of Twisted Wonderland (vignettes and events, included), and you consider other things he’s said and done in the past… This dialogue just hurts.
There’s been small moments here and there that made me think Lilia has kind of an unhealthy(?) or warped(?) view of love. I’m not sure what the best word for it is, but I’ve noticed that he doesn’t like people worrying over him, he doesn’t like emotional farewells/sappiness, and he really doesn’t like letting others see him when he’s weak.  Additionally, he seems to value himself very little – he doesn’t think people would be worried about him if he were in danger, or that people would be happy getting pictures of him, or that his departure in Book 7 would hurt those around him so much. I’ll go ahead and put examples for each point so you all can understand better what I’m trying to say.
He doesn’t like people worrying about him
We can see this partly from the quote this whole post is based on, as well as from Book 7.
Based on his conversation with Riddle, Lilia’s way of thinking appears to be:
If someone trusts me -> that means they wouldn’t worry about me
As well as:
If someone worries about me -> that means they don’t trust me
But we do worry about the people we love and care about, don’t we? We worry about our spouses getting home safely from a business trip, and our kids making friends at school, and our friends acing the interview they’ve been practicing for because we love them, don’t we? And because we want the best for them. But it doesn’t seem like Lilia thinks the same way.
And to add onto this point, it’s very clear the boys do worry about Lilia a lot, contrary to what Lilia claims. Due to Lilia’s departure, Malleus brought a snowstorm to the island in his sadness, Silver considered dropping out of school and leaving with his father, only to end up breaking down and crying in front of their crown prince of all people, and Sebek used his one wish to make Lilia be healthy and have him stay with Silver forever. They were all worried terribly about him in their own ways, but it doesn’t seem like Lilia ever noticed (or maybe he did, and just didn’t want to bring it up for some reason. Who knows.)
At any rate, he also gets mad (well, more like tsundere lol) at Silver when the boy was on the verge of tears after Lilia took a nasty hit for him. (I know this exchange occurred with General Vanrouge, and he was quite the asshole back then, but he’s still retained that dislike for people worrying over him.)
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Lilia: Oh, would you quit it with the sniveling. I drank the potion, didn’t I? I just to rest for a little bit, and then I’ll be good as new.
He doesn’t like emotional farewells/sappiness
He exhibits his distaste of sappiness in Book 7 and the Welcome to Tsumsted Wonderland 2 event. In the latter, when everyone is saying goodbye to their tsums, he mentions he doesn’t like the gloomy atmosphere. He wants goodbyes to be happy (and most likely, free of any emotional weight). The same can be said in Book 7, when he wholeheartedly agrees to the going away party the students wanted to put on for him, as well as when Silver mentions his father had wanted them all to send him off with a smile. I’m not sure if Lilia just doesn’t enjoy people getting serious with their emotions towards him, or if he doesn’t like seeing it in general. It gives me Macho Man (tm) vibes, kind of? Like, “don’t let people see you cry and feel sad because then you look weak” kind of thing but idk.
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Lilia: Farewells are certainly sorrowful, but I hate leaving things on such a gloomy note. Let’s keep our chins up until the end. Tsum, your ability to surprise others was exceptional, and you made today so much fun. So long!
He really doesn’t like letting others see him when he’s weak
There’s still a lot of loose ends to be resolved in Book 7, one of them being the full extent of Lilia’s motives for wanting to leave so suddenly. It does seem to be he’s telling the truth that his magic ran out early, since he couldn’t muster up enough strength to fight back against Malleus when he was about to Overblot, but we don’t know if the real reason for that is just because he “went a little to wild” in his youth, like he claimed, or if something else caused his magic to deplete so prematurely. But we did hear him reveal a little bit of his motives when he was talking to Floyd at the party.
Floyd was dismayed he never got a chance to fight Lilia, and he wished he could’ve seen Lilia go all out at least once. When he asks Lilia why he’s dropping out, Lilia says under his breathe that he didn’t want “them” to see him so weak.
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Lilia (whispering to himself): …It’s because I didn’t want them to see me so feeble.
Regardless of why his magic ran out and why he wants to go the Land of Red Dragons of all places, we know part of the reason for his departure is because he doesn’t want Malleus and the others to see how far he’d fallen from his former military glory. (sidebar: I have a feeling he thought he’d be a burden on Silver and co. with him losing his magic, and he was trying to leave so quickly to escape his shame towards his rapid loss of strength and independence (I imagine since he’s a magical being who comes from a country that runs on magic, him losing his powers must feel very isolating and limiting, like he’s lost a lot of the control he used to have over his own life).)
He doesn’t think people would be worried about him if he were in danger
In Endless Halloween/Spectral Soiree, Lilia was surprised by how much Silver and the others had been worrying about him and Malleus when they disappeared. Interestingly, even though Lilia is the one that Silver was the most relieved to see (it’s hard to tell with the live 2d models, but it looked like he went up to hug? Lilia and Lilia slapped his hand away), Lilia later says “I didn’t think you’d be so worried about us.” (referring to himself and the others involved with the party shenanigans).
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(I am aware they changed this line to “I didn’t think you’d be so worried about me” In TWST EN, but I’m just focusing on the JP version).
I just found it weird that even though Silver was very clearly worried about Lilia the most, Lilia kind of redirected Silver’s concern over from “Lilia” to “Lilia and everyone else”. Did it make him uncomfortable to hear Silver was that worried about him? I’m not sure, but it just stood out to me as being a little strange how he responded, and how surprised he was that his own son would get worried about him suddenly disappearing.
He didn’t think people would be happy getting pictures of him
At the end of Lilia’s Tamashina Mina vignette, Yuu stops by Diasomnia to give him some photos he’d taken of Lilia on their trip, and Sebek, Silver, and Malleus are delighted to see them, since it’s not often they get to see photos of Lilia. Lilia is surprised at how happy they are to receive those pictures of himself. But why wouldn’t they be happy? They love him and treasure him dearly, of course they’d be overjoyed to have pictures of him to remember him by. It’s like he thought they wouldn’t care about him that much, which is really bizarre, considering the whole “even if we’re not related by blood we’re still family” thing he told Malleus before.
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Lilia: To think, you’d all be so delighted just to see some pictures of me. I never would’ve imagined you’d all react like this.
He didn’t think his departure in Book 7 would hurt those around him so much
This relates back to what I mentioned in the first point, but there’s one scene that demonstrates this perfectly.
After Silver breaks down in front of Malleus, Malleus teleports both of them to Lilia’s going away party. All eyes should have been on Malleus with how strangely he was acting, but the first thing Lilia honed in on was that Silver had been crying. And not only that, but Lilia looked surprised that Silver had been crying. And why wouldn’t he cry? The one person who formed Silver’s entire world and sun and stars was about to leave him and go die all by himself on the other side of the planet. There is no reason Lilia should’ve been surprised at Silver’s tears, yet he was. And I gather that’s because he never thought the boy could ever possibly want to choose to stay by his side, to choose him over all the hopes and dreams he’d burdened on the poor child from the moment he could walk, to choose him over his real friends and his real family members.
I hope when Lilia “wakes up” from his dream, the first he does is ask Silver what he’d been crying about back at the party. And I pray to god they will actually talk things out and Lilia will finally apologize for how much of a complete idiot he’s been acting.
My headache’s coming back so to wrap this up quickly, my current understanding of Lilia Vanrouge is that he either doesn’t realize just how loved and cherished he is by his family members, or that he does realize it and just pretends not to. If it’s the latter, which is what I personally lean towards, I think he does this as a means to protect himself.
He’s already lost so many of his loved ones, and he very well may be putting up these walls around his heart and pushing away the people who love him just so he doesn’t have to get hurt again. We don’t know how he became an orphan, but his birth family either gave him up or passed away and left him behind. Even when Queen Maleficia took him in, he was always made the scapegoat for the princess’s schemes, and it sounded like he was brought up more as Levan and Mallenoa’s inferior than their equal. And then war struck their nation. And then his one best friend went missing and the other one probably gave up her life trying to protect the very child who'd go on to shatter the ice surrounding his wounded heart.
Perhaps with Malleus and Silver and Sebek now, he thought his best option would be to exit their lives before they had a chance to do the same to him, because he knew they would do the same to him. Everyone does.
As a final note, I still keep going to back to what he said in Cater’s Halloween vignette. I think this one line sums up his views of love better than I ever could:
“But the more precious a bond is, the more pain it can inflict.”
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(source)
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inuyashaluver · 16 days
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seeing nimah with the baby was so cute! would you ever write nimah x reader maybe they visit reader’s family and they see how nimah interacts with the little one then they start asking reader about when they want kids but it’s not something reader and nimah have discussed so reader thinks nimah’s discomfort around the issue is because she doesn’t want kids but nimah just doesn’t know how to express that she wants to start thinking about their future so hurt/comfort and the common misunderstanding trope! Just an idea I had an wanted to share 🤍
are you kidding? - niamh charles
niamh charles x reader
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description: in which you and niamh both want kids but are unsure how to express it
warnings: little tears, swearing, IM RUSTY
a/n: again, how do you people expect me to see a picture and react normally, I LOVE THIS WOMAN, thank you so so much for the request, much love, enjoy!!
⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆
it was rare that you and your girlfriend, niamh, had a disagreement. the two of you were very big on communication and outwardly expressing your feelings if you were angry, uncomfortable, sad, it didn’t matter.
talking for the two of you has always been important ever since the two of you started dating.
this was mainly due to the fact of niamh being hopeless when it came to flirting with you. you believing for a long time that she didn’t like you.
the girl was hopeless around you, not knowing how to act around you even though she’d known you ever since the england youth camps.
you always flirted with her and she didn’t know how to react, she’d be cocky at first but immediately faltered when you’d send her a charming smile. especially when she signed to your team chelsea back in 2020.
“hey, niamhy” you smiled kindly at her as you entered the chelsea change rooms, seeing niamh chatting along with zećira.
they both stop the conversation when they see you, niamh pink in the cheeks at seeing your sweet smile.
“hey, (y/n/n)” she breathes out, watching as you make your way over to both her and zećira. “hey, any plans for later? there’s a new cafe down the street that i want to try” you ask, making sure to look at niamh directly when you asked the question.
zećira chuckles at niamh’s surprised expression, sending you a little wink, niamh swallows, “i’m free, are you free?” she turns to zećira, “no, no, i’m not sorry” zećira grins, you smile at both of them expectantly.
this wasn’t the first time you had attempted to ask niamh on a date, the brunette always managing to bring someone else along to make it a group hangout rather than just the two of you.
“niamh” you call out, meeting her blue eyes with a sheepish smile, “i was hoping it would just be us two” niamh’s eyebrows raise slightly, both of your hearts pulsing with anticipation.
“oh” she chuckles nervously, “okay, let’s do it” she utters, “it’s a date” you wink, walking out of the change room, as you were already changed.
niamh watches you go and as soon as she sees your frame out of the door, she slaps zećira harshly on the leg.
“ow! what?” she winces, shoving niamh back, “i’m going on a fucking date” niamh exclaims, fiddling with the end of her shorts.
“it’s a good thing niamhy” niamh nods unconvinced, she’s been crushing on you ever since she was 15. how could you like her back?
and of course the date went well, once you outwardly told niamh that you actually liked her, the cocky, confident niamh that made you shy came out.
you and niamh had been dating for just over 3 years, both of you moved in and were extremely loved up with each other.
it was a sunny day in london when your family arranged a gathering with a bunch of your family members.
part of your invitation was with the insistence that your girlfriend came along, a family favourite for everyone.
“don’t you look gorgeous” niamh grinned as she watched you adjust your outfit in front of the mirror, coming over and standing behind you with her arms wrapped around your waist.
you smile and lean back into her when she presses a kiss to your cheek, “you look beautiful, baby” you grin at her in the mirror, letting her spin you to press a sweet kiss to your lips.
“ready to go?” she murmured against your lips, you nod, pecking her lips quickly and grabbing both of her hands.
“my family is a lot, if it gets too much, we can leave, okay?” niamh rolls her eyes fondly, kissing your forehead quickly before pulling you into a little hug.
“love, i’m fine” she assured, dragging you to the car excitedly at the thought of spending time with you and your family.
she squeezes your thigh excitedly as she drove, letting you give her a game plan on how to approach each and every family member in attendance, chuckling to herself that you did this every time she met them.
you grip her hand tightly when you reached the door of your aunt’s house, niamh giving your hand three squeezes for reassurance.
you look at her with a bright smile, about to ask for a kiss until the door was thrusted open by your aunt looking extremely tired.
“hello, lovebirds!” she grins, you and niamh returning the greeting with kisses to the cheeks and tight hugs.
niamh places a hand on the small of your back as you both went around and did the rounds, engaging in conversation after conversation with both of you sporting bright smiles.
“so niamh, are you looking after our girl?” one of your uncles said, you smile shyly when niamh presses a kiss to your temple, pulling you closer to her side.
“always, she has to take care of me more because she’s an angel” she smiles down at you, eyes full of adoration, drinking in your pink cheeks.
before the food even came out, you dragged niamh to the side of the backyard with a heavy sigh, thumping your forehead on her collarbone.
she chuckles, her arms wrapping around your waist to pull you closer, “you okay?” she whispers next to your ear, you mumble a yes against her, your arms going around her neck to hug her tightly before your name was screamed from the kitchen.
you groan, trying to hold on to niamh but the brunette pushed you back slightly, kissing you quickly and ushering you to help out.
you pout at her but leave reluctantly, knowing the longer you weren’t in that kitchen, the longer the lecture and you’d rather avoid one altogether.
niamh walked around your aunt’s backyard and settled in with the kids playing football. the kids always loved niamh and she’d often resort to them rather than the adults for some fun.
“niamhy, play with us!” one of your younger cousins grabbed her hand and dragged her over, smiling up at her with a toothy grin. niamh was quick to agree, smiling equally as excited.
“niamhy, you’re not kicking right” one of your cousins grumbled, she giggled brightly, apologising and letting the small boy adjust her movements the way he wanted.
it was until one of your much younger cousins, a one year old, was thrusted into niamh’s arms that she slowed down her movements.
the baby uncommonly fell asleep on niamh’s shoulder as soon as she was perched on her hip, much to the surprise of your family.
the baby was usually a handful and found it difficult to fall asleep. but niamh managed to get her to sleep in two minutes.
she was turned into a referee quickly and took her job seriously, only letting them get away with little fouls because they were having so much fun.
the kids all loved her, and so did the adults. niamh’s bright smile was hard to miss when you came back outside with platters of food.
you place the food down on the table and take in the scene in front of you. niamh with a baby on her hip while she giggled and refereed the game. to say your ovaries exploded was an understatement.
“that will be you soon” your aunt teases, you give her an expression of shock, stuttering on your words saying niamh wasn’t ready for kids, as the two of you hadn’t really discussed it.
both of you knew you wanted to spend forever together, that was common knowledge. but kids just hadn’t been brought up yet, you’d shown an interest but niamh ever really expressed a huge interest.
she’d coo over her friend’s kids, your family, her family but you never knew if she wanted some of her own.
niamh did want kids of her own but she didn’t know how to express it to you, not really knowing how you felt about them.
everyone got ushered to the table and niamh’s face brightened when she saw you, walking over to you gently to keep your cousin sleeping soundly against her.
she greets you with a soft kiss before she pulled out your chair with one hand, winking when you took your seat.
she sits down carefully, eating with your cousin sleeping soundly on her shoulder. “here, baby, let me hold her for a bit so you can eat” you offer but niamh shakes her head, letting go of her fork and holding your hand for a second.
“i’m okay, i’m the chosen one” she grins at you, you giggle, leaning over to kiss her cheek softly before you eventually end up feeding her the food on her plate because she was so focused on keeping your cousin comfortable.
when you both made it to the car after the gathering, you and niamh both let out a heavy sigh when you sat down, quickly breaking into a fit of giggles.
“high five, we did it” you chuckle when niamh holds her hand out to you, you slap her hand with yours, niamh’s fingers moving to interlace your fingers, pulling your hand to her mouth to press a gentle kiss over the back of it.
“we did it” you grin at her cheekily, niamh not missing the twinkle in your eye as you looked at her. “why are you looking at me like that?” niamh breathes out, cheeks turning a little pink at your look of adoration.
“nothing” you shrug, ushering her to start the car, she narrows her eyebrows at you but gives in, lacing your hands together and starting the car.
“you were so good with my cousins today, you know?” you glance over at her nervously, “they’re all so cute, i love spending time with them” she grins while watching the road, what she didn’t see was the tears brimming in your eyes.
you were overwhelmed with emotion for some reason, really wishing seeing niamh with the kids were your own.
it was until she heard a sniffle and felt the loosened grip of your hand in hers that she noticed. she glanced over quickly and panicked, thankfully able to park on the side of the road.
“babe?” niamh calls out softly, holding your hand tightly and taking off her seatbelt quickly. she ducks her head to make eye contact with you but you couldn’t look at her, overwhelmed with the feeling of embarrassment.
“hey” she gives your hand a squeeze, her free hand directing your jaw to look at her, meeting her eyes with a tearful expression.
“what’s wrong, my love?” you shake your head at her, letting out another sniffle, “nothing, i’m fine” you attempt to reassure her but she knows you too well, knowing you better than herself.
“baby, talk to me” she pleadingly whispers, you let out a shaky sigh, letting your girlfriend gently brush away the tears flowing down your cheeks.
“it’s stupid” you laugh wetly, niamh frowns at that, a scolding look almost. “nothing you feel is stupid, come on, baby, what’s wrong?” she gives you a reassuring smile, you can feel yourself calm down in an instant.
“when you were with my cousins, i couldn’t help but think about us” you said softly, almost impossible for niamh to hear but the small space in the car finally did her a favour.
“what about us, baby?” niamh digs a little further, her kind eyes making it easier to open up. “kids” you mutter, “our kids” niamh gives you a surprised expression, knowing the two of you haven’t really talked about this.
she also found it comical the two of you were parked up in a residential street 5 minutes from your home to discuss the topic.
“and i know you don’t want any with me and that’s okay, but i think the least you could do is get me a pet” you laugh wetly again, sniffling as you look at her,
“babe” she shakes her head, “are you kidding?” your eyes widen at her tone, she sounded a little offended and you were worried you overstepped.
“what?” niamh angles her body more towards you, “you really think i don’t want kids with you?” niamh’s eyebrows furrow again, face full of concentration as she analysed your facial expressions.
you shrug in response, a little hurt at the thought of niamh not wanting children with you.
“(y/n)” first name, this was serious, you thought.
“baby, i want nothing more than to have children with you, i always have” niamh pronounced, wiping away a stray tear from your cheek.
you look at her in slight shock, tracing her face for a lie and finding none, she was being honest.
“really?” you smile, she smiles back, happy to not see you crying anymore, “of course, my love, i’d get you pregnant right now if i could” she smirks suggestively, giving your hand another squeeze when she notices your pink cheeks.
“well, we better get home then” you tease, though niamh took it seriously, starting the car almost immediately and driving to your home.
literally dragging you out of the car and throwing you over her shoulder. sure, it couldn’t happen like this, but who are you to decline niamh?
you both discussed that children would happen a little later for the both of you, but it was certain to happen. you were both relieved to know what each other wanted.
you and niamh spent a lot more time babysitting cousins, nieces, nephews, dogs if you had to and it felt extremely natural and familiar for the both of you.
you were both excited for when those children would be yours, excited for what the future would hold.
⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆
you know the drill - pretend it’s you! ily pernille x
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niamhcharles17: trying to steal the favourite cousin status from me
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yourname: she’s MY cousin
↳ niamhcharles17: OUR cousin
↳ yourname: i knew her first
↳ niamhcharles17: baby, i came with you to the hospital
↳ yourname: go away
zeciramusovic: waiting for your turn
↳ niamhcharles17: coming soon 😏
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halcyone-of-the-sea · 5 months
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In that type of mood I need a big man to just hold me. I don’t know why I’m suddenly sad, I just wanna be enveloped by someone.
It's very hard just getting, all of a sudden, hit in the chest with a wanting for someone to lay on top of you and let you stroke their hair. In the trenches fr.
That being said, since I need more Nikto in my life and I know you like him as well....a small gift for the holiday season.
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Nikto lays on top of you, and your brain has never been more calm. 
Breath puffing out softly, your fluttering eyes slowly blink as your lungs brush your rib cage, stuffed against them as your spine is to the couch cushions. 
“Мягкий,” you hear the low grumble, reverberating through your bones as the bear atop you sighs. Expansive fingers slide up your waist, fingers dragging over flesh and clothes until they dig with a firm yet gentle caress. 
Your face shifts down, nuzzling into the bare skin and the close-cropped hair. Nikto purrs as your hand massages the base of his neck, such a beast brought low by the promise of affection—his heaviness atop you seems to double, and you don’t care in the slightest. 
Kisses and small, soft bites skim your collarbone, the man unable to help himself.
Such a weight he has, and the heat that slips off of his form made you believe that there was a fire under his skin—Russian moving to stoke it as it murmurs; rough. Sand-paper. 
You kiss his scarred head and sag back into the pillows. 
“Любовь моя,” he takes down a long breath, shoving his head farther into your neck. “You are putting us to sleep.”
Your lips flicker, eyes long closed. The living room is warm as well—the fireplace going and the curtains closed; it’s the winter season and the snow that’s falling is probably already thick on the roof. 
The both of you are heavy in a cocoon of nature and care. Trusting mass and massaging hands.
“That’s okay,” you hum to him, moving to whisper into his ear. “Sleep.”
Feeling him chuckle more than hearing it, as well as a low shiver as your nails drag, Nikto huffs slowly. “Да…Perhaps that is good idea.” 
“I’m full of those,” your honeyed smile peels back your lips. 
Nikto’s arms tighten on you, pinning you under him—like a weighted blanket that you never want to drag yourself out from. 
“Prideful,” he smirks into your skin, stifling a yawn. 
“Who do you think I got that from?” 
The Russian chuffs, but it isn’t long before you feel his heart slow and move steady—it mirrors your own. The delicate conversation of hot air and breathless voices fades into a devoted silence; holding one another tightly. 
You listen to Nikto’s breath, feel it spread over your flesh. It holds you here, in this moment. You feel the weight of him; you feel his hands. On him, you continue to trace those scars—the deep ones, the brutal ones.
Just as he helps you, you help him; even if your touch can only do so much. 
And, most of all, you let yourself get the rest that you need, never feeling more secure, or loved, than in this very moment. 
Nikto’s hands never leave your flesh for even a moment.
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irisintheafterglow · 7 months
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the first time you tell opla!zoro that you love him, you're not sober either. (part one here!)
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"i just-i just don't know what to do," you sniffle, another wave of emotions leaking through your tired eyes and onto your tear-stained shirt. "i'm so in love with him it makes me physically ill, nami."
"mhmm, i can tell," she replies absentmindedly, taking another sip from her drink in the musty light of the bar.
"nami," you plead, wasted out of your mind with your cheek pressed against the dirty table.
"sweetheart," she replies with the same melodrama, unable to hide the amusement in her voice.
"i'm so sad." your voice breaks on the last word and you make a loud hiccup-like noise that has the other guests of the bar eyeing you warily. you couldn't guess how long it'd been since you dragged nami from her hammock to go drink your sorrows away. to her credit, she stayed with you until her patience was thinner than a paper cut.
"i know you are," she says slowly after you'd gone over the same topic about four times in the last five minutes. "look, i feel like you should just tell him. he already told you his feelings."
"see, but that's the thing." she shoots you a skeptical look and you sigh back at her. "what if he's lying? or if he didn't actually mean it?"
"why would he lie about something so significant as that?"
"i don't know, maybe he thought i was someone else-"
"from what you've very thoroughly informed me, he expressed his feelings for you, and only you," she reminds you, tilting her glass toward you for emphasis. her gaze flicks up behind you and she raises her eyebrows briefly, like whoever was approaching was another tool for her entertainment. "tell him. it's now or never."
"what the hell do you-"
"you're out of your mind if you think it's okay to get them drunk before a mission." his voice immediately sobers you, white-hot shame coursing through your veins as you sit up and try to make yourself look presentable. thankfully, he's glaring daggers into nami, who merely shrugs and offers something about being here for a good time, not a long time. "c'mon, i'm taking you back to the ship," he mutters, lifting you from your seat and letting you grab his unfairly strong bicep for stability.
"why'd you come get me?" your steps wobble slightly on the cobblestone, but zoro's determination to keep you upright is unwavering. "i could have gone home with nami."
"i got worried about where you were. thought something happened."
"nothing happened except alcohol and feelings," you drawl absentmindedly, the airy feeling in your mind becoming fuzzier the longer you're with him.
"ah, two of my favorite things."
"liar, you only talk about your feelings when you're drunk." blinking slowly to recenter yourself, you cut him off before he can counter your accusation. "like, the other night. when you told me you loved me." the words slip out unplanned and his body becomes deathly still next to you, his arm so tense you could mine it with a pickaxe.
"i said...what?"
"that you loved me and that it was a secret," you say plainly, glancing at him to find his face a nearly imperceptible shade of pink. "what's with the blush?"
"it's nothing," he says quietly. sober you would have left the conversation at that, respecting his need for privacy and security about his private feelings.
drunk you, however, has no such manners.
"look at you, all red and shit." his ears become an even deeper shade of pink and you can't help laughing at his poor attempt to hide his embarrassment. "you wouldn't be so flushed if it was actually nothing, so what is it?"
"it's nothing," he restates. "it doesn't matter."
"it matters to me. you matter to me." his face feels like it's been set on fire and every place your body is making contact with his feels like an electric current. did you have any idea what your words were doing to him, he wondered. sure, what you said made his brain go foggy like the island coastline in the morning, but what you made him feel was so much worse. you made him feel so lovesick, it pained him.
"the sentiment is reciprocated," he murmurs low enough that you can barely hear him. even while you're dancing around in the streetlights, you've never looked so beautiful to him.
"can i tell you a secret?" he swallows thickly, unsure of how to continue navigating this situation. he settles for nodding, every movement restrained to keep from kissing you until the only oxygen in his lungs has gone through yours first. "you can't tell anyone, though."
"i'm a great secret keeper."
"no, you're not," you reply instantly and his mouth gapes indignantly. "you told me your biggest secret and you don't even remember it."
"fine. i won't tell anyone what you tell me, then. i don't know about anyone else," he promises. after what seemed like an eternity, he finally helps you into your hammock, taking great care to make sure you don't fall out. "if i do tell someone, you can kick me in the balls."
"enticing offer," you laugh and his mouth quirks in a half-smile that you only saw once in a blue moon.
"so, the secret?"
"oh, right," you whisper sleepily. "the secret is that i love you too. i love you so much that i want to throw up."
"i think that might be the alcohol, doll," he murmurs, his fingers gently brushing your cheek. "sober you and sober me need to have a long talk in the morning."
"we said that last time but didn't do shit about it."
"well, i think it's time i did something about it." your eyebrows furrow, completely forgetting anything you'd just talked about. it's okay, he figures. he'll show you how much you mean to him when you're both ready.
"did something about what?"
"how much i love you, too."
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