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lovepookie · 4 months

Text

₊˚ෆ Green Light - l.hs

♡︎ sypnosis: in which you have a staring problem—and lee heeseung notices. the weirdest part? he’s totally into that. he just needs the traffic light to turn green to make a move. did you like him like he’s come to like you? find out next episode! on-

♡ genre: fluff, college au, fem!reader, crack, strangers to lovers

♡ 3.4k word count

♡ warnings: uhh cussing, stalker-ish?, stalking mentioned as a joke, please let me know if you’d like me to add any!

♡︎ nano note: hello lovelies! i’m trying to feed the hee-stans so i really hope u guys like this. feedback is much appreciated! (this may or not have been inspired by the song greenlight by 5sos lmao) may or may not write a part 2 idk lmk. xoxo

.♡.

You saw the way the corners of his lips turned up at his friend’s joke. He was so entrancing, and you didn’t know why. Literally every little move would have your breath hitched in your throat. It was actually kind of annoying. You watched him as he blew his hair out of his eyes, leaning back in his chair in a lazy way. He was just so attractive.

But why?

You’re not sure. You let your mind wander in almost anger as you try to compose yourself.

“Yah! Heeseung there she goes again.” Sunghoon whisper yells in a teasing manner.

Heeseung feels his ears turn warm and refuses to look in your direction.

“Ahhh your secret admirer?” Niki leant in, a playful smirk gracing his lips as he put his full trust in the chair he was sitting on, leaning back on the back two legs to support himself in the air. The professor had told him multiple times about not doing the dangerous act.

Did he listen?

No.

“Leave it alone.” Heeseung mumbles, picking up his pen and spinning it throughout his fingers as he looked down at his notebook. It wasn’t like he was taking notes or anything, the professor was late again to the lecture so everyone was conversating about as they waited.

“You should talk to her.” Jay said nonchalantly, a bubble gum lolipop in his mouth.

“Yeah~ You should~” Niki says as he giggles and bumps his shoulder into Heeseung’s. All Heeseung could do was blush further.

It wasn’t like he was new to the attention, he’d always had an admirer or two, but this felt different.

He’d always liked a couple of the people who took interest in him first, but it was always a sort of physical and straight off the back type of attraction. He was just like Jake and Sunghoon; having many girls lurk his way, but only the popular and pretty ones were the one’s they gave actual chances to.

But you?

This was different.

He’d be lying if he said he couldn’t say why. He had taken notice of your stares one day and had thought nothing of it. You were probably just another admirer. Right?

But one day, he decided to meet your eyes and smile at you for once. And low and behold, he wasn’t sure if it was the best or worst thing to ever happen to him because all you did was stare back. You seemed slightly caught off guard for just a moment, but your gaze never relented. It felt like a a couple seconds at most before his friends nudged him out of it, but damn. He felt so entranced through such a little interaction. The boys took notice of this of course, and now they tease him for it, but he didn’t really care. During the stare down, it felt so…

Different.

He’s given a girl the eyes before, but when he stared at you and you stared back unafraid and even unfazed, he suddenly felt as if maybe he’d been caught checking you out. It lit a fire in his stomach and released the butterflies from their cage—sappy enough to say.

From that day on, he had grown interested in the girl who stared. Almost no emotions could be read from your eyes, so Heeseung felt like he’d remember it forever.

What could he say?

He didn’t understand why he suddenly gained fondness for your cold unfaltering eyes.

He just knew it all felt…

Different.

There he was again.

You sighed as the pretty grey-haired boy had rounded the campus hallway, going in the opposite direction that you were headed out of.

Your breath hitches as you took him and his friends in.

Well, more like just him.

He was tall and lean, but strong within himself and the laugh he let out made you feel weird. He was very attractive. You couldn’t quite place a reason why, but you felt it—the steady feeling of your heartbeat speeding up.

After indulging yourself with a few glances, you decided to place an earphone in your ear and go on with your day.

Maybe the song you were listening to had reminded you of him—you’d never admit it though because by this point in your infatuation you were just trying to seal away any and all ideas of him. If it was up to you, you’d forget the lingering thoughts of him altogether.

You saw the way he looked at you too.

Still.

As far as you were concerned; you had no chance with Heeseung.

That was just reality.

One foot hovering over the gas pedal—yet the red-light never changes.

“Guess who’s here…” Jake says as he swings his arm around Heeseung.

Heeseung’s eyes go up from his phone as he looked around almost instinctively and found you. You had your headphones in and wore a pretty moonstone necklace around your neck—but this time your eyes weren’t on him. He watched as you wandered the hallway and scrolled through your phone, most likely to pick out a song. He wandered what songs you’d be listening to; what songs would you specifically take the time to seek out? Did they sound pretty and soothing like your demeanor, or were they loud and abrupt like your gaze?

Heeseung cursed himself for thinking of someone this way.

He didn’t know why he did if he was being completely honest. It was like one glance from you and his whole world changed. To this day he refuses to aknowledge where the butterflies came from.

“Bro at this point, you’re the stalker.” Sunghoon joked, gaining a laugh from Niki and an elbow to the stomach from Sunoo.

“Hey, just because she stares at him doesn’t mean she’s a stalker, genius.” Sunoo mutters.

Jake just chuckles.

“I don’t know. I’d say they’re both stalkers.” Jungwon chimes in, running through a bag of mini chocolate chip cookies like he was a thief in a jewelry store.

“Hey, you say all that but I saw you eyeing her sister. She’s a Sophomore right? Like Sunoo?” Jay states, snatching the cookie bag and chomping down.

“Jungwon likes the Noona’s?!?” Jake teases, eyes going wide.

“Y-yah!” Jungwon yelps, eyebrows furrowed fiercely in contrast to his pink puffed up cheeks.

Heeseung’s eyes widened.

So you had family on campus?

Interesting.

He wandered if you two were close; he’d always been close to his brother.

Heeseung pauses as he realizes he’s curious about your family affairs but after scolding himself a bit inwardly, Niki’s voice brings him back to Earth. “Oooh~ Maybe Jungwon-hyung and Hee-hyung can go on a double date.” Niki suggests, a playful look in his eyes as he towers over his hyungs.

He was a big baby at the end of the day—they didn’t know how he skipped a grade and became a Freshman with Jungwon to be honest.

“Okay pipe down, she’s getting closer.” Heeseung mumbles, his large hand going on the back of Niki’s neck threateningly. The boys quieted down with teasing smiles on their faces as they came up on you in the hallway. In an effort to not be obvious, they achieve the opposite as you get closer and closer.

“Watch this.” Sunghoon whispers, before Heeseung’s eyes go wide.

Within a millisecond, Sunghoon’s hands are pulling at the back of Jungwon’s backpack and dragging him along to stand in front of you. The group can’t help but to stare wide-eyed at the sudden and bold interaction.

“Ummm…Y/n, Is it?” Sunghoon mutters out as Jungwon flails around trying to desperately get out of his grip.

You look up from your phone at the sudden presence in front of your walkway as well as because of the close new voice. When you meet eyes with Sunghoon, his handsome and intimidating ones are still no match for your guarded and undesiring ones.

“Hi? can I help you?” You ask, now sparing a glance to the group in front of you, a dozen plus eyes staring back. For a moment you lock eyes with Heeseung as—for what you’d like to say came from your imagination—his brows soften.

“Oh- well uh, you see, this kid right here is Mr. Yang and he was wondering if your sister was single….” Sunghoon says, gathering his confidence as he talked.

You take notice of the boy in his grasp and how he straightens up at the question. He grimaces but still stares at you expectantly. If he had been coerced into this, he seemed to be equally as interested in your response now.

“Uhh…yeah. She’s single. But not for long.” You state.

Truthfully, you had no interest in any of this, but the countless hours your sister would speak of this Jungwon kid had you wanting to stir the pot a bit.

You knew who they all were. You knew all of their names, courtesy of Heeseung—yet you never let your sister know her crush was also your crush’s friend.

“Oh?” Sunghoon asks, getting more and more comfortable being cheeky as the minutes went by.

“What do you mean not for long? Is someone currently talking to her?” He asks. You scoff as you look down to your shoes, and when you look up you let a small smile give way.

Heeseung feels his heart sink to his ass.

He’d never really seen you do that before.

You were very pretty and your smile did things to his stomach. It left him wondering what a laugh or a wide playfull smile from you would do to him.

“Well…I’m not sure…what was the name she keeps talking about?…” You ask out loud and look around as if to gather your thoughts.

“Was it Jungwon?…” You see the dimpled-boys’ eyes light up.

“…Or Sunghoon?” You pause in thought.

All of the boys’ eyes go wide. Sunghoon let’s his grip on Jungwon go as they stand speachless.

“Or was it…a short international name? I’m not sure.” You say wafting your hand in the air nonchalantly and watching as Jay, Jake and even the possible Niki go tense.

Heeseung watches in amazement as he quickly reads up on how you’re speaking and carrying yourself as if you were executing a play of some sort; your theatrics and persuasive words doing just enough to fool his dumbass friends.

You quickly do a scan over the friend group and see shocked faces, along with a grumpy looking Jungwon.

He quickly turns to you.

“Thank you for your time. I apologize for the inconvenience.” Jungwon utters before he’s grabbing Sunghoons arm to lead him back to the group for a nice and easy talking.

You let a giggle slip as they walk away, not realizing how gullible they would be.

Going back to your headphones and playing your music again in order to switch gears to leave, you decide maybe the sad love songs were too melancholy right now. That was quite a fun interaction that just played out, if you do say so yourself. This time, a love song shuffled from your playlist but before you could get far enough away from the group of boys, your music blasts out loud due to your wires not being plugged into your phone correctly.

You panic and start to fidget to fetch your phone back out of your pocket, the lyrics of love ringing through the halls.

“And it feels like oooh~ you don’t know my name~” The woman of the song sings out melodically. The smooth R&B sounds that follow really catch onto the baseboards and walls of the open hallway, and you curse yourself for walking near the music rooms to get to class. When you finally get a grip on the situation and pause the music, your cheeks are red in color and your heartbeat is at a steady and quick pace. It was at this moment you realized how fucked wires really were and that you needed a Bluetooth upgrade.

As if on cue, a tap to your shoulder pulls you into even more embarrassment as you turn around to take a look at the suspect. You lock eyes with him.

Large pupils softly looking into yours; the nerves you take notice of in them are almost overshadowed by a courageous type of interest.

“H-hi.” He utters out, almost like a whisper.

Still, you catch what he says.

“Hi.” You say back, realizing you’re probably doing that thing again with your eyes where you lock onto a target and analyze it carefully.

You were aware of this habit of yours—and man so was Heeseung. But this time, it was different.

He’d never seen you so up close and personal before. He realized you were shorter than he expected up close, his stature peering down at you to connect your eyes with his. Your eyes were back doing the thing again he noted, but my oh my your rosy cheeks accompanied them so prettily, he forgets the whole reason he even walked over.

After hearing your small response back to him, it takes him a bit to respond, snapping out of the hold your gaze held on him as soon as he realizes that you are just waiting for a response; the two of you just staring at each other in the middle of the hall. His cheeks match yours in crimson. His hand goes up to rub the nape of his neck.

He still never breaks eye contact with you.

“I- uh…I know what you did back there.” He says, unable to look away. You tilt your head sideways in confusion, and Heeseung swears his heart is about to jump out of his chest and run away for everyone in eyeshot to see.

“I…My friends? They just asked you about your sister and I wanted to say you were really good at messing with them. It was charming.” He finishes, looking back and forth between your eyes.

You blush further.

Charming?

Was he really talking about you to you right now?

“Oh- I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to lie, just thought I’d stir the pot a bit…” You mutter, and now your eyes are searching in each of his.

He starts to smile when he takes notice of this.

It’s almost as if the words being spoken held no meaning, the real conversation happening between eye contact—words being merely a sad excuse so that you two could watch each other up close; study each others intentions through your eyes.

His smile goes wider as he takes in each of your words and tries to multitask, and he finds himself pulling apart esch of your words so he can understand them—having no time to stop the current conversation happening silently.

“Uhm, can i ask you a question?” He asks after another pause. You stare up at him curiously now.

“Sure…”

He smiles as he continues to locate your soul through your eyes. Heeseung knew how he felt. He knew that what he felt very well might be overflowing admiration and curiosity for you.

He liked you.

And despite that it all started with catching you staring at him first, he still felt like he needed to know your intentions.

Did you really feel the same?

Was he special? Different in any way?

“…What color are my shoes…?” He questions, almost like a whisper again. You hear his words and kind of just stand there as you look up, a little confused for a second.

Heeseung chuckles and looks away for the first time in what feels like hours. When his eyes meet yours again, he’s leaning forward, his hands behind his back as he towers over you.

“I said, what color are my shoes?” He repeats, this time a little more confidently.

You knew this was a challenge by his body language; keep your eyes up top and answer the question.

Without looking down you try to rack your brain for the color of his shoes.

White?

Black?

Fucking red?

You don’t know, you don’t stare at his shoes, you’re too busy looking at-

Oh.

Heeseung watches as the realization pops up on your face. He was asking this because it was a reflection of your attention on him.

Heeseung’s shoes were bright green today.

We’re talking neon-neocity green.

The rest of his outfit was all black because he got ready this morning in a rush out of fear of being late for his morning lectures.

And so when you couldn’t answer despite him catching your glances throughout the day, he knew he had his own answer. No, this didn’t proclaim your love for him—but the interest was there, he could tell by the way you looked away for the first time during this conversation, your blush never settling, eyebrows furrowing.

If he didn’t know better, you were madly in love with him. Or so he’d like to think.

The fact of the matter is, if he’d caught your eyes so many times today, why didn’t you know the color? Don’t people who like someone else capture everything about them? What was Heeseung’s thought process? Simple.

In the many weeks he’s caught you staring it was always at him. His face, the back of his head, his side profile. This sole fact and your reaction right now let him know that you were worried that you wore your heart on your sleeve—that you were too obvious in the feelings you conveyed with your eyes. That maybe you were aware of the fact that he knew you’d been watching him relentlessly.

Your face read that you had been caught.

After quickly looking down at his shoes and seeing the godforsaken brightest color in the universe, you can’t help but grimace even more.

“They’re- they’re green. And they’re just shoes-“ You try to get out, but your words are cut off when you look back up and Heeseung’s eyes are smiling with him. For a second you see them glance at your lips, and just like that, you were done with this conversation.

“It was nice meeting you Heeseung, but i have to go.”

Your heart was pounding in your rib cage and it, accompanied with the empty feeling in your stomach, made you feel like you were going to be sick any minute now.

He was terrible; terribly attractive and he knew it.

Heeseung watches as you leave, a laugh leaving his pretty upturned lips.

“Catch you later!” He yells out, cupping his hands around his mouth to get his voice to carry over to your quickly fading figure.

“I love that song too!” He finishes, smiling like a love-sick idiot puppy, forgetting how to walk, learning how to see and trying to adapt.

He looked like a complete moron, stumbling in the halls and looking past strangers in order to continue to watch you go.

He didn’t know why.

But you lit him on fire and kept him feeling warm.

It was a small interaction—but one he’d never forget.

“Hyu-“

“Hyu!”

“HYUNG!” A loud voice rings out, taking Heeseung out of his love-coma.

He snaps his head back to his friend group and is suddenly aware of their presence altogether. Heesung can’t help his smile from falling as he realizes they just saw him do…well…all of that.

“You should’ve seen yourself-“ Jake laughs, running up to him with the others trailing; all with the most painfully teasing grins painted on their faces.

“Shut up.” Heeseung says pointedly, his blush looking worse on his ears and cheeks and along his nose bridge as he flatlines his face in an attempt to hide any and all emotion.

Safe to say, his deadpan doesn’t work.

“Oh my god! He looked so whipped- it reminds me of that one loser-in-love squidward meme!” Niki jokes, laughing with Sunoo.

Yes, even Sunoo was clowning on him; or at least laughing at the circus.

“Please be quiet.”

“Nah, but did you hear him?? wHaT COLoR aRE mY shOeS?!” Sunghoon mocks, slapping a giggling Jungwon’s shoulder.

As if one cue, Niki and Jake both mimic Heeseung’s lean forward which sends the group into a laughing mess. Jay grabs onto his stomach as he wheezes about, the whole group unable to hide their amusement. Heeseung sighs as he lets himself be ripped apart by his friends.

Whatever.

It wasn’t too serious.

As they continued on and dragged him about as they walked through the halls, he went nonchalantly, tuning them out to the best of his ability. With the way they yelled and loudly laughed, he wouldn’t be surprised if the whole school had learned of his little crush.

Still, he didn’t mind. He trudged along, staring down at his shoes with a slight smile. He liked you, and as far as he was concerned, you did too.

All signs pointed to yes—and they were painted a bright neon green.

The light had finally changed colors after waiting for so long; It was go time.

Heeseung was going to make you his.

2024 © lovepookie

♡︎ please do not plagarize, repost, copy or translate any of my works. thank you.

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thatdeadaquarius · 1 year

Note

OP your addtion about the Harbinger's reaction? Sent me wheezing to the moon 🤣🤣💀

I dont have any additions to Teyvat language yet (other anons have a more in depth explanations while mine is just shitposts wheEZE--) but I did have an idea for a Genshin AU.

I'm pretty sure everybody has heard about the blue alien people Avatar. Tribal people from another planet. (Also I just stumbled upon the forests of Sumeru while going through Chasm quests. The one that has giant mushrooms).

Imagine Genshin in the Avatar Au. Sumeru can be based on the first movie (It fits cause from what I can explore of Sumeru reminds me of the time I watched Avatar of the first time. Pure awe and wonder..) While the Water nation can be based on the 2nd movie, Hoyoverse hasnt released the name of the Water Country yet so we're just waiting. Mondstadt can be based on the upcoming 3rd (4th or 5th? Idk they had it lined up) movie that involves being high above the clouds. Kind of like the Jade palace or the Floating Abode in the serenitea pot.

Its all I could base for now since the other movies dont have that much info yet to be paired with Genshin's countries.

Bonus idea that randomnly popped into my head:

Still going with this Au but its sagau themed. Creator!Reader arrives to Teyvat and is considered as Eywa

NOW THIS

THIS IS AN ✨️IDEA✨️

I just want u to know i feel b l e s s e d that u put this in MY ask box , when this coulda been a whole post of ur own 💖💖🙏🙏

WARNING: So i havent seen the new movie, just the og Avatar one, and i totally loved that concept about Eywa and how their world works so ill refresh myself but if theres any new lore from the 2nd movie i aint got it yet 💁 srry babs

🎵 FROM THE DAY WE ARRIVED ON THE PLANEETTT

AND STEPPED OUT BLINKING INTO THE SUN

AND THE SUN ROSE HIGH IN A SAPPHIRE SKY

ITS THE CIRRRRCCCLLLEEE OF LIFFFFEEEE 🎵

^ except ur like the life itself bc ur god now

Thats why i put that there

This AU radiates that energy

♤

BRO I TOTALLY FORGOT ABT U MENTIONIMG THE COOL CHASM STUFF AND PICKED THAT GIF ALL ON MY OWN

BC I THOUGHT IF ANYTHING LOOKS LIKE EYWA TREE IN GENSHIN ITS THAT BEAUTIFUL MUSHROOM GOD

ANYWAYS-

So I accidentally posted this too early so keep refreshing or coming back bc if theres no "♡the beloveds♡" im still updating this then LMAO

SRRY GUYS

So anon's a genius and i could listen to u talk about this all day

I fucking love combining world building or lore together

Esp like making one the AU or just the setting like u said with Avatar worlds as settings and same characters-

EEEEEE U ARE EYWA- YESSSSS YESSSSSS I AM YOUR GOD BITCHES!!! SUCK ON MY BIG FAT MAN TIDDIES BITCHES RAHHHHH /REF

♧

So they deffo use "Eywa" as a term for you instead of your name

Honestly, before when u were a mysterious af planet creature thing (lets say u get isekaied there i mean)

Nobody rlly knew if u even could take a mortal form or even thought of that as a concept

I feel like the younger generations immortals and Teyvat's current countries kinda think of you Eywa as more of a passive entity life force thing

Rather than the older immortals and creatures that had seen thru eons or over the course of a couple thousand years

That u were very aware and intelligent

Not that ur energy or aura didnt tell them that alone

◇

So a little deeper into the Teyvat lore here but i dont see anybody else talking about it so I will

Originally, it was the Seven Sovriegns and you, and eventually Phanes and their Four Shades,

And they literally all quickly came to realize u literally made this planet and began to start the first traditions of worshipping you!

Like putting gifts or hand made goods at the base

(Ppl have also gotten a tradition from Morax/Rex Lapis and Guizhong and other adepti to leave birthday letters to offer you, which ties into what i say below⬇️)

Ya know,

Eywa the tree could even be a sort of source to the eyes of Teyvat of what you look like while u were playing the game

Like how Eywa's little jellyfish reach ppl in the forest and shit? I think?

So like i would imagine that whatever u make certain vessels or acolytes do most often, is what they think they should offer u :0

◇

Claymore users give u gemstones and ores

Bow users give u hunted game like fowl, or the treasure from puzzles that required arrows (like those bursting blue balloons?)

Catalysts and Polearms give u all kinda of crazy shit lmao

Bc they can be used for a vareity of things

◇

Bc of ur player status and abilities, people of Teyvat attribute a gain in power or talents or whatnot to you, Eywa

So say u actually physically there now, and u just wake up under the coolest sickest tree youve ever seen in ur life

Omg could u imagine????

Seeing Teyvat irl? But AVATAR WORLD IRL???!!!

You would stand there lookin around like a drunk fuck for like 20 minutes, maybe longer lmao

Its just so ✨️pretty✨️ here

Also the tree itself just feels like, the equivalent to ur bedroom basically but like specifically if it was hella comfy and like just the way u want it (all the decor is up, the floor is clean, u got like hot choco on ur desk, theres a candle burning, etc.)

♤

Oh so since ur like weirdly connected to the land, like u know how theres a voice line abt walking in that glowing aranara part of Sumeru and ur steps light up?

I saw that too in the OG avatar movie

So i feel like u would have a map with ALLLLL the peoples on it and little icons

U can focus on just vision users or bosses or big nature things like Dragonspine

◇

Oh so Eywa can control all animals and whatnot and so u as a mortal person can too

So anytime theres a threat u can deadass just become a pokemon trainer LMAO

Ok but think how badass it would be to just like,

Get the Primo Geovishap or Giant Bird Jadeplume Terror thingy to just leave their territory and wipeout some mfs

(coughunknowngodasomodaycough)

It would be fucking amazing

♧

Unrelated to above bc im just spitting out ideas srry guys

but like

I feel like if u were a lifeforce sort of ancient eldritch god for the entire goddamn continent of Teyvat let alone the whole planet-

You would have to maintain said continent/planet

Like, make sure the Irminsul is growing okay, protect from mfs like Dottore,

Stop diasters if ur Eywa too, esp bc u can hear prayers now, and would hear ppl crying out to help them geez

while the prayers of the many kinda just glob together to form the major "feeling" of the prayer for most creatures,

Vision users, gods, ancient creatures u can get their exact sentences

Basically more magic = better heard to connect with u

◇

Oh u know, i could even see it being even more manual or personal labor bc ur not like a tree connected to ur roots thruout the world technically

Like if volcanoes erupt in Natlan, the archon and gods there help and u r also wanted/needed in person for it to work

U would still be powerful, but yeah like say the tree was u just playing genshin before,

The game automatically regulated diasters and stuff other than what was supposed to happen in game

◇

So kinda bouncing off that I read smwhere that the Na'vi dont actually view Eywa as like omnipotent or omniscient

(like the God™️ from the Christian bible for a example of what your not)

And also! Dont blame/attribute natural diasters, plagues, or other bad stuff on Eywa

So good for you whew 💦

Ur actually supposed to kinda just be the collective lifeforce or Teyvat/world and nature, and a defender and guide of life :0

Which kinda fits with the whole "upgrading characters" thing actually

◇

Okay but I saw somewhere in SAGAU tag someone did another name instead of Creator to spice it up and its "All-Mother"

And interestingly, Eywa in Avatar is also called that and "Great Mother"!!

How fun :0

Also, the reason Eywa still got people with free-will is bc they kinda described the relationship to Eywa being something like a mother or parent

Maybe where name/titles came from ig?

Either way, ppl be calling u all types of nicknames u aint heard before lmao

I mean ur sacred, they dont just say ur name,

Nobody knows ur real name or what u call yourself

Just what they call u

Bc they couldnt communicate with u super well before, (the bday letters were the closest they got verbally, and even then they had to be addressed somewhat to ur first vessel the traveler to get thru/be seen)

Otherwise yeah u operating them lets say before on Earth you rlly felt like an eldritch nature deity 💀

Cause u guide them in battles, strengthen their talents and skills and bodies, and feed them food

If they were in battle like needing healing food, u help them heal by consuming it for them so they dont have to take a snack break in battle and

Let me tell u, these denizens of Teyvat who have to constantly deal with magic and monsters and abyss stuff, so a stroll outside ur house gets u in a fight...

...They are very grateful for that needless to say.

Plus i like to think u make fighting easier on them bc ur "guiding" their bodies

◇

Anyway thats a long winded way to say, help me think of all the names Teyvat's given you lmao:

Eywa

All-Mother / Great Mother

All-Father / Great Father

All-Parent? / Great Parent

Creator

Their Grace

Great Puppeteer

The Puppeteer

Soul of Teyvat

Greatest Soul

☆

She aint long bc im not that creative and this idea has sm potential too😔

I would love to be Eywa sounds fun and powerful af and i dont get expected to be Jesus and they know i dont cause the natural diasters, like that sounds nice

Aight im no genius and this writing feels like im just rambling like a drunk guy sittin on the sidewalk mumbling to myself, i had to stop writing 💀

Like that energy specifically-

So lmk if yall got any other cool titles or names :0

I couldn't think of anymore :/

Also srry about the updating this post and making u check back in if u already read this before i put the taglist

(Me putting the taglist means im done editing/writing this dw if u seein this)

Cheers,

🌒🌧🌊Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

♡my beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist

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a-dowryofblood · 2 years

Text

Ok, I think I have solved The One Direction Wall Incident™

or the 1D Wallgate

I think it happened in Belfast the year 2015 and the 1D member that did was... Niall. Listen to me listen to me, I know we all thought he was the only one who would never do that but give me a second to explain why I think so.

We know the fight was backstage so probably a concert and IDk if you remember but 1D only cancelled 1 concert in their entire time as a band and it was in Belfast (Oct 2015). It was cancelled minutes before the show started because Liam was sick.

It was literally announced on stage while fans were waiting. I think it shows it was a really last minute decision to cancel and that would probably put every member on edge, specially if it was that Liam was just partying or late as it's the rumour.

Liam also admitted the he wasn't in a good place that day. He had broken up with Sophia and was going through some personal stuff. That day it got to him, he also said in an interview in 2017 that by that time the boys felt like they all needed space from eachother. [X]

Even back in 2015 there was a rumor they had a big fight that night. The rumour was also that they released Perfect MV and Home as an apology to the fans. Louis and Harry tweet apologies, and Niall doesn't say anything:

Now, we also know that Niall was set to have an interview and it got cancelled right after the cancellation of the concert because he too was sick.

So... I'm not saying Niall got sick of Liam that day and pushed him against the wall for making them cancel a show, I'm just saying this is my best guess and it's based in the rumours that were going around back then. I think Louis was trying to mediate the whole thing and Harry was in the background processing everything.

Liam admitted he wasn't actually sick that day, so I imagine Niall wasn't sick either for the interview. They probably just had a big fight, tension was high because Zayn had left the band earlier that year and 1D was coming to an end.

*Once again dramatic recreation of the scene.*

#Don't ask me why I dedicated so much time to this #i need a distraction #and i got myself one #thinking of making this into an elaborate PowerPoint for a presentation party #it's been years but also 1D was my life back then #one direction #1d #niall horan #harry styles #liam payne #louis tomlinson #zayn malik #1d wallgate

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jeonqkooks · 7 months

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I seriously don't get it. Like, you can be a fan of an actor or a director and it doesn't mean you automatically love every single movie they've ever been in or made. You can talk normally with other fans about what you loved and what you didn't. And *gasp* you might have different opinions because taste is subjective! And just because it's not your type of movie doesn't mean you won't give it a chance or not be excited about the next one.

Why is the attitude towards BTS so different? Hell, sometimes they don't even love the work they put out or change their minds on it as their tastes evolve. You can support and love JK and wish for his happiness and success without vibing with every single thing he does. And it's ok to talk to each other about it without it being classified as a personal attack on the artist. The whole point of art is to provoke thought and discussion!

i think the reason why the attitude is different toward bts is bc kpop fandoms (and maybe this fandom especially) are toxic as hell 😭 the kpop fandom culture sucks and i think we can all agree on this. literally anything less than absolute worship is considered “hate” and (as you said) “a personal attack on the artist”, which i think is stupid as hell because ??? make it make sense. 😑

yeah i don’t know why it’s such a “controversial” thing to have an opinion that’s different than the majority of the fandom, an opinion that doesn’t include always screaming about how much you love bts and the thing they’re doing. i say bts but honestly i only ever see this kind of stuff happening with jk. 95% of the discourse i come across is jk discourse.

i am literally a jk stan. we all know that. if i love a thing he does, i’ll proudly say it. i can yell about how much i love Stay Alive all day long. you guys KNOW how much this blog used to revolve around jk. clearly i am not “out to get him” and i am not lurking in the shadows with my little rat hands waiting for him to release new content just so i can dunk on him. 😑

as a fan and a literal consumer of his music, i am allowed to have certain expectations. he doesn’t seem to be going down the direction that i would’ve liked, and that’s perfectly fine. you do you, boo 😗 if it’s not my taste, then it’s not my taste. but i’m still allowed to have my opinions on this and i’m still allowed to express them.

expressing my disappointment does not mean that i hate him or i don’t support him anymore. it’s as simple as that, but apparently even that is still a very hard pill for a lot of people to swallow. “but they see everything!” okay lol i can guarantee you (not you anon, just people in general) that bts are not creeping on my tumblr blog and taking notes of every single thing that i’m saying about them. even if they are, i can still guarantee you that they do not care lol. me not listening to a song/album literally will not affect their streams at all. it will not affect their revenue in any way. jk is still a multi millionaire whether or not i listen to or buy jjk1. he does not give a shit about me because he does not know i exist lol.

with that said, a big reason why i am PISSED is because of the fans. jk doesn’t care about me, do you think he’s crying in his room because i said i didn’t like a song? do you think that he - a 26-year-old grown ass adult and global superstar with 10 years of experience under his belt - cannot handle criticism? do you think he’s a baby in an adult man’s body or something that you feel like you personally have to defend him against any and all criticism? that you have a duty to make sure that he doesn’t hear anything less than positive that people have to say about him?

if your answer is yes, then, well, idk what else to say to you lol.

but if your answer is no, and you still come after people for having different opinions, then lol sorry i think you’re weird 🤷‍♀️ why can i only speak my mind when it’s something along the lines of “OH MY GOD I LOVE IT SO MUCH. ALBUM OF THE CENTURY”? when i say something as simple as “i’m a little disappointed by this. this isn’t something i really vibe with,” i’m considered a hater, an anti, and told to shut the fuck up? why can i only say what i really think when it aligns with what the majority of the fandom is thinking?

i am not attacking jk by not being into his music. i am not attacking jk stans by having a different opinion than they do. i am literally just being honest about what i think, my opinions which only affect me. what is so hard to understand about that lol

another point that i would like to touch on is when people say things like “but why can’t you let people enjoy it?” erhm. i’m not going into people’s inboxes and screaming in people’s faces “I DON’T LIKE IT, SO WHY DO YOU? YOU SHOULDN’T LIKE IT EITHER!” 😑 if my not liking the music ruins your fun, if it genuinely hurts and upsets you, then maybe you should take a step back from all of this and reevaluate. if you are hurt by an online stranger having a different opinion than you about something as simple as MUSIC (which is subjective to everyone’s personal taste) made by someone you will never know, then i don’t think the internet is for you, honestly.

#this was longer than i intended lol #but thank you anon for giving me a chance to say this #hope you have a good day/night 🫶#anon #answered

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xcziel · 3 months

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this has been sitting in my drafts as a response to some ideas that were circulating online a week or two ago due to that bang sihyuk interview, and it's clumsily worded but i still feel like it's a valid take so i'm just posting anyway. i'm not a music professional or connected to the industry, so if i'm far wrong just ignore this random post. i just get frustrated that for all the talk of strategy etc. everyone seems to act like bts (and by extension jk) are an established *western* act while either still promoting like a kpop act in sk schedule-wise or like a beyonce/tswift level act (which ... yeah duh) with vast u.s. name recognition (not so much) - and then wondering what's not clicking

idk about this "crisis" but i know one thing has struck me about the kpop and sk press and kpop stans in general

i touched on it back when i was talking in my tags about like crazy getting traction in the us

and what i meant was that those involved in kpop are too blinded by the industry cycle and too used to that cycle's accelerated evaluation by stans and press alike

like no one in the us who is not already a fan is waiting on the day of release to listen stream and buy. it is NOT like sk with weekly shows, several comebacks per year, etc etc

and most especially it's not this thing of: create song, choreo, mv, do a spate of music shows, see what hits if anything, maybe leverage concert dates if it does - but if not then done! next concept! move on and keep it moving - got to fill those music shows and if you don't constantly have new pieces to show you could lose attention and traction

but the general public in the u.s. is NOT socialized to all tune in to check out what's new at a certain time each week or whatever

only some check the charts and even that is mostly just to see where their personal fave is

what gp recognition goes by is repetition (that's one reason why radio is weighted so heavily in ratings- not fairly, but it's true): have we heard a song before? was it in the car on the way? was it in the club? was it in the music in the background at a store, at a party, on a friend's playlist?

when americans say they heard a song "everywhere" it means literally you could not escape it - and for that kind of feeling or environment to exist, it has to happen over *t i m e*

true, yes, sometimes a song takes off and gallops out of control like a wildfire catching but that is the exception not something that can be planned for or marketed into existence

and once you are a big enough name and have enough fans (us population @ 330 million so ... a lot more fans than it take to equal the same percentage of sales in sk ... so only a sliver of a percentage of that can mean a #1 bb hot 100) you CAN get that immediate-drop chart push

but most of the time, u.s. artists need to build up name recognition with the folks who wouldn't know a music chart if it popped up in their excel spreadsheets. that's why you get youtube reactors or even music business professionals months after release going oh i didn't know they even had an album/track/mv out

the larger a group, the longer it takes for things to disseminate past the early adopters and the media who watch them and the industry (nobody wants to be left behind, so journalists/talking heads are always like pets when you walk into the kitchen: heads on swivels in case it turns out relevant, and will write things just to be on top of a possible trend)

and this is where, i think, after watching hybe and its american arm try their push on jk, the kpop focalists are veering astray in their plans and projections: not seeing immediate huge success (or not *sustained* huge success) they think there is some kind of crisis rather than understanding that a u.s. or even just western gp fandom cannot be a top-down thing - it will take time

bts are huge (and yes a triumph for bts IS NOT and SHOULD not be lumped in as "a win" for kpop in general as has been pointed out is too often the case) but in the first days of jk's album release, *2 months* after seven had debuted, the huge nationwide retailer where i work couldn't even get his name spelled correctly in the point-of-sale database, so

the u.s. music industry is a big machine and busy on its own, many listeners only stay in their own bubbles and don't pay attention to anything outside that, because just keeping up with the output of one scene or genre can take as much effort as watching the kpop industry as a whole

to break wide you need to be either insanely ubiquitous and not just on social media (which runs the risk of people getting sick of you just as fast) or you need the slower groundswell of people going from "oh *that's* them? i heard of them but i didn't know that was their song" to "omg that's my song!! turn it up!"

there's just too much out there today to catch people's attention and the media cycle turns ever faster - used to, a song could be out and getting steady radio play and it still wouldn't hit the consciousness of the national public for like 3 or 4 months sometimes. sometimes it could take a year or more.

so this thing of short promotion periods for kpop acts - even bts! - is just not viable as a way to attract a wide gp following in the states. being on late night tv shows is a good step, but since the advent of streaming the influence of shows like that has waned considerably since the days of ed sullivan or johnny carson.

jk's run of promoting *was* the right kind of thing to do in fact - it simply should have been much more spread out over time. you can see all his album collab artists have things coming out *now* ... and there's no way to really take advantage of that with the curtailed promo.

and yes, obviously jk did get probably the second longest promo period of all of bts chapter 2 solos efforts (i think yg's tour ran longer?) and it was cut off for very valid reason! but!

i think bangpd et al. taking the fact that they couldn't make jk a household name in the u.s. nor nab him a grammy nom (nor any other kpop groups) within the 5-6 months of their fairly blatant push for us recognition as indicating a "crisis" is just not looking at the long game.

they didn't get all the accolades right away, so it seems they've decided 'that didn't work we need to make some big changes' instead of continuing what they'd been doing in support of the artists

it's this attitude of welp they didn't give us a grammy we were entitled to even though it's the first time we played ball in this particular way, so now we're worried bc we don't know how to shop kpop beyond people who aren't primed for it

like, they are looking at the business of it, and likely accurately, but not at the audience itself

it's not that the observations bang is making are wrong i just think he is basing them off premature information - songs in the u.s. DO benefit from purchase power, but they ALSO rely a lot on word of mouth. not for charts positions necessarily, but for longterm growth, support, and more importantly demand, you cannot beat a fandom that grows on its own.

the paid promotions at the end of the day serve the same purpose as bts's early days vlogs in the current western music climate - getting the artist and songs in front of as many eyes and ears as possible. but then you have to allow time for that wave to spread - and the bigger the pond, the more time it may take

#this is just me rambling #but the thought wouldn't leave me alone #it just seems too quick #kpop moves fast and on the surface it may seem like the american industry does too #but it is not the same at all and you can't expect the results to be in that fast #you'd think the man who rode the bts train would understand but i think he's looking at metrics not audiences #and expecting the kind of results he'd get in sk or the kind of results he's told american acts of similar stature to bts would get #either that or it's all a long game and he's going through steps in a script #which i would not put it past him to have some plan behind these moves #but really this post is me being a bit irtitated at the fact that they *coukd* have made jk or jm american household names #if they'd just *sustained* the promotions over time - i really believe this #and this seeming expectation that they can run a 'global popstar' campaign on an sk comeback timetable kinda bugs me

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statementlou · 1 year

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I'm not gonna lie, Louis referring to his queer fans or the fact the he has them as "weird" would be pretty disheartening. one thing was to do that in 2014 around the great gay war, with so many indicators that they were actively fighting. another is to do this now, in 2023. and even a straight artist not for one second to consider his lyrics could resonate with queer fans regardless of larry would be a bit shitty. I'm just saying that whatever he says is gonna be VERY hard to believe he was forced to. And if he openly shits on Harry it's safe to say his career - as the chance of 1D ever reunite even for a quick photo - is over.

well I absolutely agree that he will not have been 'forced' to say anything that he says in this movie. And I hear where you are coming from, but I just think the catastrophizing is unnecessary. First of all, we have ONE (1) almost certainly made up and definitely purposefully shit stirring anon (and a slow news day) to thank for all this discourse, we have no idea yet what will be in the movie, and it is always weird to me that people are so ready to believe the worst when I, personally, feel like Louis always comes through for me and gives me the BEST. Have FAITH in LOUIS!! WHEN does he let us down like literally WHEN???? (Unless all you care about is him coming out/ ending it/ confirming larry, in which case, IDK, get your priorities right and appreciate what's in front of you? Cause those things are not happening.) But anyway...

I can completely imagine a scenario in which Louis says he thinks it's weird that so many queers feel inspired by him and it makes me want to hug him forever- because I think he does find it weird and remarkable. It makes me think of that one 1D days receipt where someone said they met him on the street and told him he inspired them as a gay and he was like "I don't see how with the way things are but that means a lot." I think that was probably made up, but also it rings true to me, I feel like he does find it wild that with the public face of everything we still are here and love him so much and see what we do in him and think he's brave. As for the Harry thing, anything he says about him will be taken wrong and distorted and picked on by everyone, if he says anything at all less than "he's my husband and has never done anything wrong in his entire life he is perfect" people will say he's "shitting on Harry"; but that said, Louis is an intelligent media trained person, why are people seriously debating whether he's gonna get on screen and talk shit about Harry Styles?! also literally when in Louis' entire life has he ever said one single bad thing about Harry come on It's not fucking realistic and that alone should tell you that that anon either made all that up or it's just a really bad interpretation of whatever was actually said because the person, like everyone else around here, was so busy expecting the worst that they couldn't just chill and listen to Louis. Like, worst case scenario, let's say he does say that Harry was being offered some really incredible opportunities and he wanted to take them and Louis hadn't really thought about what he would do after the band and so when that happened he felt blindsided and adrift by suddenly not having his ever waking moment scheduled and accounted for (as Liam has also talked about experiencing), would that be so horrible??? That sounds like real life stuff and I don't personally think anyone is the bad guy there or it's horrible to say, but also I BET HE DOESN'T SAY THAT. IDK man, I just think we should all calm down and wait and see, but I'm REALLY not worried that the bombshell of this movie will be Louis coming out as being against Harry or talking shit about his fans, you know?! Come ON. I expect that with the premieres before the release we're going to get a whole lot more overwrought interpretations of things but I don't buy it; I look forward to hearing what Louis has to say and I will be real surprised if it isn't reasonable and interesting and probably mostly NOT THAT BIG A DEAL

#louis has adhd however taxing it may have been I feel like having people figure out everything for him and just tell him where to be #was probably kind of great for him #and transitioning to having to figure everything out from scratch all alone was probably hard as hell even without #everything else that was going on #let him talk about it without making it about the others #blah blah blah

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cosettepontmercys · 5 months

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Hi! I'm sorry I took a few days to reply. Omg I'm so sorry you don't have a voice right now! That sounds so awful. Just try to drink as much water as possible I guess and hopefully it gets better. I think baking is a lot easier for me too..just because I don't make that many cooking recipes or anything and it's harder to know what dishes to make. I also think it takes a lot longer and same here..everyone is better at it than me and never gives me enough time to learn or anything. But I definitely think it will be a New Year's resolution for me to work on it more and just try harder. I hope your voice has at least gotten a little better since I last replied to you and that you're feeling better overall. Hopefully you can start the new year healthy but I hope you feel better sooner than that haha. The only time I've ever lost my voice is at concerts. I remember after my Taylor show, my sister lost her voice and couldn't talk for three days..but I've never had laryngitis. Well I also enjoy apple pie and I'm a fan of most desserts actually.

I think I will be happy with any vault songs she gives us and some of those are familiar to me too. I'm not sure why she didn't release Let's Go (Battle) but I think Need could be put on rep eventually..even if we know it's for Lover, it almost sounds more like rep. But it also reminds me a little of False God too so I'm not sure. I think she will add Beautiful Eyes to debut honestly which would be good since I don't really listen to it. The holiday album I'm more iffy on but I guess it could come this year maybe? I think I heard a rumor about it so idk.

Well I think I might have been confusing that one with NFU cuz he says I just miss the way that we talk..but I agree that I should give it another listen. But I really liked that one, and Glitter and Honey. I'm sorry you couldn't make the concert..that's such a bummer. Btw Saw you in a Dream is one of my fav songs ever but I actually haven't heard many other songs..just a few besides her newest album and maybe her EP before that. I don't actually know what my vinyl player looks like because it's unopened so I have not played anything on it yet but I hope you find what you're looking for and get lucky.

I liked him and think he will do good in the role but only saw one clip so far which was Wait For Me. I will have to look for more. Ooh who is the euryidice stunt cast? I hadn't heard about it. I still haven't got a chance to watch the parade performances or any Dancing performances actually. The only thing I saw was Taylors tour choreographer talking about the Vigilante Shit chair dance which is cool. She is the same choreographer who worked on the La La Land movie so that's pretty cool and I love the dancing in that movie so maybe I will watch a few. I also like the dancers in the tour during Lover and Enchanted.

Well I guess one goal I have is to finish more books that I start lol. Then of course finish the ones I'm in the middle of right now which is going to be paired up with a few on the list. My sister wants to read more too and I have a few in mind we can read together already that we never got to..which is the ones about twins and also the Night Circus. We also started Daisy Jones together a long time ago. Read more books that I own and are on my shelf and I made the goal of reading two books a month so far so we'll see how that goes. Wow that also is the same number of the year which is 24! So hopefully I stick to that. I also said that this year and failed miserably lol. I think I only read two full books this year and maybe two I was in the middle of from the previous year lol. Or maybe I will try to finish one or two I'm in the middle of right now before the year ends. I do not know many upcoming releases yet but Emily Henry and Carly Fortune are definitely two I'm looking forward to and the If he had been with me sequel. So I am supposed to reread that with my sister maybe next month since it comes out in February I think. Or Night Circus and Starless Sea too..idk cuz maybe those will take more than a month though. If you have any other books you think we can read together this year let me know. There is also the Today Tonight Tomorrow sequel and I hope to read the first one as it gets closer. What are some upcoming ones you're looking forward to?

So the movie was good! Like it was a pretty good and faithful adaptation I think. But I also didn't love it as much as other people really seem to either. It felt like they changed a few little things from the book or maybe just cuz I speed read it..oops. Although I'm not sure if you would get it as much if you didn't read the book..like if it would be confusing. I filled in a few things for my sister for example. I feel like the narration in the book made things clearer that was hard to show in the movie. The performances were good though at least. I liked the songs but I need to listen to the soundtrack again. It did not feel like the kind of movie I would wanna watch again really and it was kinda long. In fact it just made me want to rewatch the Hunger Games again and those movies were a lot better. It's just my opinion though I guess. I do like all the edits I've been seeing or connections and reading people's analysis though. I think we are also going to see the Renaissance movie this weekend too and I will probably enjoy that more lol. Although I'm worried it looks more like a documentary of the tour than the full concert..which kinda sucks cuz we didn't get to go.

I know she's been working on it a lot so I guess I wonder what will happen. What genre would you hope for in her new music? I've always wanted her to try more rock honestly so it makes sense why I loved I Can See You so much. I know it might be about her breakup though so I'm not really sure. Red also had hints of rock like State of Grace which is another one of my top favorites so I still have some hope. I also wonder if the music she's working on now could be for her upcoming film too..which it seems like no one has considered. That's so awesome that you saw all of your faves live this year..omg! If I ended up going to Paramore..then I could have said the same haha. They are definitely going to be one of my top artists haha. So I got Say Don't Go right technically but I think that was the only one. I also forgot that she already sang Afterglow or else I wouldn't have guessed it. Yes omg! I think that was my favorite pairing of these shows but I would've been fine with Innocent and Now we don't Talk. I love Say Don't Go but dislike it's Time to Go lol. Now that she's resetting the surprise songs next year, it will be harder to guess..which also makes it more fun! She also says there's extended version of the movie for her bday but didn't mention Cardigan in that list. Also she just put You're Losing Me on streaming finally. Maybe I will finally appreciate this song more but its also kinda just there for me lol. I wish I liked it more. I think it's honestly one of my least favorites out of all the songs she has released this year so hopefully TS11 has better songs. I hope you feel better and continue to have a good week. Happy wonderful Wednesday!!! 🩷

hi friend !! it has been ... ten (?) days without a voice now, which is just very frustrating but i'm mostly still in good spirits! the one downside is that my friend is coming into town friday through sunday, and i'm worried i won't have a voice by then still. but i can't really do anything about that, so we'll see. might have to continue doing text to speech robot voice! it's her first time in seattle too which makes it all the more interesting! but yes, staying hydrated, sitting next to the humidifier and just hoping i'll feel better soon! i went back to my best friend, the doctor's, and he gave me some new medication yesterday so hopefully that'll do it's magic soon! i'm surprised that i didn't lose my voice from eras weekend at all, but i did from boston (although that one is more so because i got sick → got laryngitis). guess it also makes a huge difference that eras took place over the summer!

what's your favorite dessert? mine is a toss up between black forest cake (what my mom makes for my birthday every year), tiramisu, and chocolate cake! but i also love oatmeal raisin cookies (probably my personal favorite thing to bake). my mom's also really good at baking bread, and i definitely need to pay more attention to her little tips and tricks when she does!

oh i could see the false god/need comparison! two of my close friends really want need to be released, and i hope it is for their sakes! i would loveeee the holiday album to come soon but i feel like it might be a "end of tour" gift next year? maybe? if tour is even over by then?

i was listening to i miss you already + i haven't left yet on vinyl yesterday as i worked! was thinking of you 🤍 i do think i still like his debut album more than i miss you already, but i also have listened to that one more/longer/etc. so maybe it's just recency bias! i feel like i'm starting to get burnt out (?) on new music? if that makes sense. but i'm also really excited for the holly/MUNA into your room, and then noah kahan/gracie abrams everything everywhere remixes that come out this week! but i think that's different since it's not new new music? i've been listening to fruitcake ep by sabrina carpenter a lot though! that one's really fun. saw you in a dream is soooo good and i also really like f a r a w a y ! but sunshine baby is definitely my favorite.

i heard rumors about lizzy mcalpine as eurydice? which i don't know how to feel about! for many reasons! here's an audioboot, if you're so inclined! i did see that quote and i thought that was really cool! i'm really excited that eras movie will be on streaming; i've got like ~ $25 amazon digital credits saved up, so i'm going to be streaming it on her birthday i think! just a little something fun! i notice new things every time, and i like picking a dancer — or two — to focus on! i would love to see a a BTS documentary of eras after it's done; i'm so curious about the quick changes, the rehearsal process, etc.

two books is still two more than you previously read! it's not a competition, and reading is supposed to be fun!! i almost started a new book tonight but i was too tired and then i remembered i haven't replied to you yet so i grabbed my laptop to do so! i think i'm going to try to work more on my les mis/night circus annotations tomorrow, and that'll probably be the last time i get to read until sunday or monday! i also need to update my reading thread — and make my 2024 reading tracker in google sheets! so much to do! i usually do a post on my book blog for 2024 anticipated releases, but i'm SO out of it that i can't even think of anything aside from my friends' books that are coming out!

i've never seen the hunger games movies aside from the first one, but i think what i want to do is do a series reread, watch the movies, read tbosas, then see it? maybe? or maybe read them all then watch them all? i have no idea! but all my friends have been talking to me about it and i have to be like WAIT I HAVEN'T READ IT YET DON'T SAY ANYTHING !!! it definitely has taken over my entire fyp, and i'm always in awe of how good people's editing skills are! i hope it's the full concert; you'll have to let me know how it is since i won't be seeing it for a while (if i end up seeing it)!!

i'm also not the biggest fan of it's time to go! i love the "but i've got me" line and think it's so symbolic of how this entire tour has been for her, and hearing her sing it live has definitely made me like it a bit more but i'm still not the biggest fan of it for some reason! out of all the surprise song combos in 2023, which one was your favorite? i wonder if cardigan will be on the streaming version, or in a physical DVD exclusive? we'll just have to wait and see! feels weird for her to exclude just cardigan. i did not expect her to release YLM today! i woke up and my phone was blowing up from friends about it haha! i do like it more with you know, proper production, dolby atmos, etc. and not ripped from an audio somewhere, but it's definitely not my favorite!

hope you have a good rest of your week!! 🤍 are you doing anything fun this weekend/anything you're looking forward to in december? love you!

#post: answered #🩷 anon

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inkofamethyst · 1 year

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November 11, 2022

I actually did the worst on my open book popgen exam lol (not that it mattered anyway). I’m in a good place grade-wise, I think.

You know, all of these programs conveniently leave out the fact that not only do you have to submit a personal statement, but you have to also write four, five, six other little essays on random (they’re related) topics. Like,,, HUH. I just thought I’d pop in with a quick “boy howdy I wanna be a scientist, a woman in stem, a personified bunsen burner” and then be met with a round of applause and a stipend but apparently that’s not enough these days.

Also some of my apps are asking about my sexuality and that was definitely not a thing four years ago and like idk I know some ace folk feel like they fit in the queer community and that’s totally fine and I love my little hahaheehee’s on acetok but putting it in writing (yes, I recognize the irony considering the nature of this blog)??? FIRST of all I don’t know if this is real or if it’s purity culture-induced guilt. I could get married and it all falls away and suddenly you’ve got a sexual being on your hands (one in need of therapy tho bc I’ve heard it’s a difficult switch to make). SECOND what if it changes. I dunno I just.. there is no truly permanent sense of self and.. ugh. I mean I could say I’m aro/ace and they’ll be like “wow so she won’t be distracted by boys she’s a safe bet” but what they don’t know is that I’ll be distracted by everything else.

On a lighter note, listen. I get it, LMM maybe wasn’t at all what we were expecting from Hermes. I love the jokes, I think they’re silly because, ultimately, that man is a dork. A theatre kid (who makes pretty bangin music ngl). All adult theatre kids deserve ridicule. No exceptions. Obviously I want him to do well because I want the show to be good and I trust Rick. I love the silly jokes, but I feel a little bad bc we’re circling back to that time on tiktok when Hamilton had just been released on D+ and everyone was watching it and making fun of the guy even though he wasn’t doing anything except loving being on stage.

And, breaking news, it turns out that I may not get into that education class after all which kind of sucks. I have to wait until the start of next semester to see if the section has seats available at which point anyone will be able to register. Until then, I’m registered for a greek art class in its place.

Lastly, it’s surprisingly easy to slip into supporting eugenics and I blame this on the fact that geneticists find eugenics to be so abhorrent and such an uncomfortable part of the discipline’s history that it’s rarely actually discussed or taught. And this is the same problem with minimizing slavery or the holocaust or the treatment of indigenous Americans. Those who do not learn and critically consider history are doomed to repeat it. Scientists have an ethical responsibility to go beyond providing data. They must nip misinterpretations in the bud by addressing the context of their work. We read an article (more like a saga of articles, it was the scientific equivalent of a fight over twitter) in popgen which got me completely wired by the way that it used eugenics rhetoric without addressing that issue explicitly, and that feels so much more irresponsible than saying your a eugenics advocate outright (my prof had to assure me that the author was not, in fact, a eugenics guy). I just... science doesn’t exist in a vacuum, and we live in an age where information is readily available to any person at any time. Scientists need to keep that in mind and consider the social ramifications of their work, especially if it relates to humans. Neutral science does not exist!! We’re all influenced by the context in which we are raised!! Anyway, back to the original point, eugenics should be taught sensitively in science classes so that people understand a) how to detect the warning signs of a budding eugenics-based argument and b) why they’re wrong to begin with. Only then can we civilly discuss issues like how to mitigate the problems of the (fairly theoretical to begin with) human genetic load or whatever.

Today I’m thankful for the walks promenades I took last night and tonight!! It was decently warm and I just needed to blow off some steam (we’re a mere week into daylight savings and I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate how sunset starts at 2 pm I hate how I feel down more often now). Plus CRC3E38 was released yesterday and I tore through that thing on my walks. I’m thankful that there’s a big open area on campus where people often frequent so I feel safe walking at night. I’m thankful that I, a patron of the arts, went to see an (free) a capella show tonight, a lovely and uniquely collegiate experience. I’m thankful that my cello-friend liked my arrangement draft!! Finally, I’m thankful that I know people who will straight up tell me who the red flags in my field of choice are because I was definitely unknowingly flying close to one.

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thebangtancloud · 2 years

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Every performance of theirs since the dinner gives off this really bittersweet feeling. Not even an exaggeration, I'm always teary eyed by the end. Knowing what we know now, and them performing those songs knowing that we'll know a part of the truth in a couple of days, the sadness and struggle can really be seen in their visage. You can practically see the "I wont get to stand with these 6 brothers of mine in a stage for a while and perform like this in front of army so I just gotta really soak everything in and be in the moment" expression they give off.

I know they aren't on a hiatus perse but they clearly stated that their priority atm will be their solo careers. Yes bts contents will still be released but I dont think it'll be anything major or performance like. Maybe with the exception on armys birthday? We'll just have to wait and see.

I really love them and it hurts me that it came to the point where they lost sight of themselves. Really a huge fuck you to covid. Sorry for sorta ranting outta the blue. Feel free to just ignore this if it bothers you.

Honestly? I've been wanting to rant about this quite a bit too, but I really didn't have the strength to do it. I feel everything you said, and the day I listened to Yet to Come and For Youth, it didn't really hit me. Not even when they had the festa dinner.

It was when I was watching the BTS Tiny Desk Concert (which is almost like a ritual cuz I play it every evening while the sun sets) and I heard them say, "Hey, we are BTS!"

It really...broke me.

Do you know why? Not cuz I won't get to hear them say that in a while. It really made me think of the pain they might be feeling because they won't get to say this for a while.

There really are just so many things about every single day that has passed since the 10th of June. Idk if it's just me...but I feel like the boys don't feel like BTS anymore? There would be moments when the boys would individually claim, "but I am BTS." and to hear Namjoon say that no he's not BTS, he's just a part of it, really...idk. Idk why that hurts. Must be me and my overthinking mind.

I get his point though, and as a leader, fuck. I respect that man so much. The responsibility? The burden? It was SO evident in his words, in his tears. Can you even begin to think what it's like? You're BTS and you're at the top of the world with literally every second person knowing who you are - and you just know that you can't go further. I get him when he said that they had a message to share, and I get him when he cried. But when he said that he felt like he overshared and caused misunderstanding? Let me just go cry in a corner.

And it's not easy for any of them. You can see that in their eyes during their performances. Fuck. I'm tearing up rn. But i don't wanna make this about me, or any of us. It's about BTS.

They offered themselves completely for the past 10 years. Completely, you hear me? And they deserve this break. They deserve every bit of mental peace and time and space that they're choosing to take for themselves and no one should have a say in that.

If I could, I'd really write to them and tell them just how much I support them. That I'll always be here. That it's okay to feel what they're feeling. It's okay to cry and it's okay to not be able to see what's ahead. It's all okay, even when nothing's okay.

Bangtan sonyeondan forever.

On a side note: I have full faith that BTS will come back. A part of me that broke when One Direction went on a hiatus and promised to come back really holds me back from believing that BTS will come back. But a major part of me, the part that BTS touched like no other group, the part that taught me life like no other group, really really doesn't let that hope die out. BTS are true to their word, they've always been, and they always will be. They'll come back, mark my words.

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iamacolor · 2 years

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hi im a casual wayv and nct listener and im confused and idk if u know whats going on but did lucas permanently leave these groups?? i thought he would take a break or something and come back but its been a while now i think? you dont have to answer if the subject is uncomfortable! have a nice day!

hello anon! tbh I don't think anyone really knows what's going on even though it's been so long now (I can't even remember when it all happened or what exactly happened tbh). sm hasn't released any statement since the initial one saying he was taking a break from his activities so officially he's still in nct. WayV hasn't had a comeback since he went on hiatus so sm hasn't had to release a statement clearing up why he was or wasn't here. Some other members have been spending a lot of time in China while he was gone so everything's been kind of put on pause (and I have a feeling sm is dragging things to just wait it out rather than take a decision about wether he's staying or not). They'll hopefully adress it whenever wayv has a comeback next but that could be in months so who knows really. I think he's been active on ig again? So maybe he will come back but I know many people will not welcome him with open arms, especially since the remaining members have shown how well they can perform without him, sm has a lot of work to do (but also the company is known for not really updating people on anything lol)

#anonymous #I've got mail

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rafescoke · 3 years

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Never sent a request idk if I do this right. Been to lazy and not good lately and honestly I just need a good fluff. The basic plot where he is in a bad mood like angry and then he turns to his lover etc etc. Do your thing I just need some comfort and love!

Cupcake ; Rafe Cameron

masterlist

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x reader

Summary: Maybe making cupcakes with a girl he likes won’t be a bad thing

Warnings: Slight angst on the earlier part, cursing, substance, extreme fluff, adorable Rafe Cameron

A/N: I hope you're doing good, sending all my love and hugs @ you <33 remember to rest!!! @asimpwriter

p.s; you know the drill - send any requests!

"Fuck off," Rafe sighed, shutting his eyes against the bright chandelier above the dinner table. Since when did it got so bright? The last time he checked, it was dimmed. "I swear Sarah, say one more word and I'll fucking kill you."

"Rafe," Ward sighed, placing his cutleries down onto the expensive wooden table. "It's family time. Excuse your sister."

"She's hanging around with those stupid pogues, dad!" he groaned, not wanting to believe that his dad was on her side. Not that he was ever on his, but he thought his father would have the same mindset as him towards this topic.

"Let. It. Go."

"They're my friends," she breathed, and Ward closed his eyes again, knowing the screaming that was about to occur. "I'm sorry you're stuck with Topper-"

"Didn't you cheat on him?" he laughed, and turned to look at his dad. He mouthed at him with an amused expression, "She cheated on him."

"I didn't, and we broke up 2 weeks ago. I'm sorry he couldn't move on from me," Sarah shrugged, and Rafe watched as she put aside her green beans and offered some of the mashed potatoes to Wheezie.

How could she act so normal about this?

"Oh, and-" Sarah turned to Ward, and Rafe waited impatiently for the lies that was about to slip from her mouth. "Do you know that he does drugs?"

"Sarah!" Rose yelled, furrowing her eyebrows as Rafe laughed out loud, clapping his hands loudly that the sound echoed throughout the huge house. "It's a family dinner!"

"I don't give a fuck about this family," Sarah said, removing the napkin from her lap and quickly standing up to get out of the house. Ward didn't say anything, neither did Rose, and after a few seconds, he let out a sigh.

"This is getting out of hand," he started, clasping his hands. "Rafe, I'm no longer letting you take over my business."

Rafe stopped his movements, looking at his father with widened eyes. After all those time he spent at college, trying to make his father proud and to take over the business, only for this?

"Dad, you can't. She's lying, dad, I haven't been using drugs."

"I saw the stash, Rafe," he sighed, and Rafe thought about the space under his bed. He closed his eyes, muttering a ‘fuck’ when he finally remembered the empty space. He didn't think much about it earlier, thinking about how he must have used up all of the powder.

"Until you get your life back on track, or nothing at all."

"Dad-"

"Go find your sister, and bring her home."

"Dad, please-"

"Go find Sarah."

"Okay," he sighed, standing up immediately and letting the chair scraped the polished floor. Wheezie shifted uncomfortably at the sound, and Rafe had an urge to do it again, just for the sake of riling his father's anger.

He cursed silently, walking away towards the table and to the porch, all while thinking about the joy if he could destroy the Pogues' life for making his hard.

The drive from Figure 8 to The Cut took him 30 minutes at high speed and being fully caffeinated, and when he arrived at the Chateau, all riled up from the quarrel with his father that he had before, he didn't try to see if his sister was even in there before barging into the small home.

"Yo, what the fuck?"

"Where's Sarah?" he muttered, giving Kie his side glance and continued searching for her. "Where the fuck is she?"

"Yo, bro, this land is off to the kooks," JJ stepped in, eye to eye as he leveled up to Rafe's height. He was only an inch shorter, but the difference was apparent. He continued to place his hands against his chest, whispering slowly. "Especially to crackheads like you."

Rafe laughed, tilting his head to the back to release the tension building up in his body. He was so, so close to give the blonde boy the consequences of his words, but was halted when Sarah entered the room, hand in hand with John B.

"What are you doing here?" she groaned, walking forward and standing in front of him. "God, can't you leave me alone?"

"Oh, trust me, I rather do that more than anything especially-" his eyes trailed to John B, "When you're fucking with a trash."

"JJ-" Kie stepped up, pulling JJ's shirt to stop him from doing anything. She sighed, knowing that this was bound to happen anytime soon, and she had told John B about this before, but he didn't listen. Now it was like her job to protect her friends from Rafe.

"Leave," Sarah stated, her lips pulled into a tight grimace. "Leave before I'll tell dad about this."

"I'm just trying to protect you," he ran his fingers through his hair, making it more messier than ever. Why couldn't she get that? All he was doing - it was all to protect her, so that his father could see him for what he's worth.

"You know what?" he sighed, wrapping his face with his large hands and turning towards the exit. "You wanna be one of them? Go. Don't ever come back home. You're just another trash, anyways."

He wasn't sure if he meant them, or if it came from the heat of the moment. All he could think about was to run away, to hide and to never come out and face his father or the judgement put by everyone else. He felt an uneasy feeling rising in the pit of her stomach, but he was too proud to say sorry.

“That was useless," he thought, leaning over his motorcycle and blinking his eyes against the lights by the side of the road. He couldn't go back now, not when his father had just ordered him to bring Sarah home and he had failed to do so, and he couldn't go to Barry's; his dad could find him there if he search for him the next day.

He groaned, feeling the cold air nipping at his skin until the final thought occurred to him. He laughed then, not sure as to why he hadn't been thinking of that sooner, and soon he was in front of the mini apartment.

He rapped on the door and waited patiently, his heartbeat quickening. He looked at his watch, checking if his arrival was too late. He groaned, noticing the time, but it would be embarrassing for him to turn now.

(Y/N) was trying to figure out what colour should she put into the frosting mixture, her hands on her waist when she heard the knock.

Her head instinctively looked at the clock, frowning when she read the time. It was not that late, only around 10 p.m., but she was not ready for any guests or her friends to come over.

Had she been too loud that the cranky neighbor next door who sleeps early everyday had come to tell her off?

She sighed, lowering the music coming from the radio before making her way to the door. She was in nothing but her ribbed top and a pair of sweatpants, and her hair was messier than ever.

"I'm sorry, Jerry," she sighed, opening the door to greet the old man. But standing in front of her was not the grey-haired man with furrowed eyebrows, ready to scold her, but it was the boy she had been crushing on since forever instead.

"Rafe?" she exclaimed, and she couldn't deny the shock spreading through her veins at the sight of him. He was sweaty, like he had just been in a fight, and his shirt was sticking to his body. "What are you doing here?"

"Hey, I'm sorry, can I come in?"

The smell of freshly baked cupcakes wafted into his nostrils, and he noticed the drool in his mouth. He didn't eat dinner that much, being forced to chase after his sister, and all he wanted was to enjoy some good food and get a good sleep for the night.

"I'm not. . . we can't. . . I'm not prepared for anything-"

"It's okay, I didn't come for sex," he bit his lips, trying to contain her amused laughter at her statement. "We're friends, (Y/N), aren't we?"

"Yeah," she raised a brow, not grasping at the way he was playing his words. She allowed him in, asking him to sit by the kitchen counter and checking her porch outside to see if there was any cameras in case he was trying to prank her.

Rafe Cameron never contacted her for anything if it wasn't for sex.

"What are you making?" he pointed at the mess on the kitchen, and (Y/N) tried to hide her red face as she quickly tried to put the stained bowls and cutleries into the sink.

"Uh, cupcakes."

"Yum," he chuckled, liking the way she was so nervous around him. The truth with (Y/N), she was extremely wild in bed but also very shy outside. It was like a complete two different person, but he was always intrigued by this.

The first time they had done the deed, he was shocked when she got into control, and he would lie if he said he didn't enjoy it. That night was one of Rafe’s best nights, the starting point to the many after.

"Relax, (Y/N)," he laughed, watching as she tilted a cup and placing his hand under the table to catch it before it could break. (Y/N) yelped, struck to her position, and let out the biggest relief when Rafe put it back to its previous place, safe as ever.

"Why are you so jumpy?" he whispered, sneaking beside her to help with whatever she was doing. He hadn't got a clue about this whole baking thing, only watching Cake Wars for the drama, but he wanted to help the girl beside him if it means he got to spend time with her.

"What are you doing?" she muttered, glancing at Rafe's hands as he whisked the fluffy frosting. "Rafe, you're going to get it more clumpy."

"No, I won't."

"Rafe, I swear," she groaned, reaching over to grab the whisk only for him to turn around, laughing while she struggled to get him.

"I'm just making it more fluffier," he smiled, continuing to whisk the mixture without even looking at the white colloid. He was too busy looking at her, and he wondered if she knew about the small amount of flour powder that had gotten on the top of her nose.

"Was the coke good?"

"Huh?" she tilted her head, confused, and still angry at the way he was not listening to her.

"The nose. Was the coke good?"

(Y/N) gave him a look before going to the corner to stare at herself in the mirror, letting out a yelp when she saw the powdery stain on her nose. She quickly dusted them off, stalking back to the still-whisking boy, and she wondered about the amount of energy he had in him and how he was still not tired.

"Rafe! It's all clumped!" she sighed, finally having a hold on the large bowl. She took her a finger and tipped it into the mixture, pulling out before slipping the finger into her mouth. Her face scrunched up, and she reached for the glass of water by her side.

"What? It's more prettier. More texture-ish. If we're in Cake Wars, we'll be the winner."

"That's not how it works," she groaned, pouring the failed mixture into the sink and letting the water cleansed them off. "Now my cupcake's going to be naked."

"You know what can be naked too?"

She held up her middle finger, placing the wet bowl onto the counter and using the clean cloth to wipe it dry. "And I'm not giving these to the children's home naked. You have to help me, Rafe."

Rafe felt a smile tugging on his lips at the mention of 'children’s home', and he thought about how perfect could she be. She’s the epitome of the girl everyone wants to be - she's good in school, never using anyone's money for her, good at baking, and has a big heart?

He thought about how she's good in bed too, but he tired to shake the childish thought away.

"What can I do? Should I go to the store and get any Betty Crocker's frosting?" he offered, his hands in his pocket to reach for his keys. He watched as her shoulder slumped, and he felt bad for ruining her cake. He touched her shoulder, "Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't know it would actually be clumped. I thought it would get even more fluffier."

"You don't think, Rafe, that's why," she sighed, "But that's alright. Do you think you can help me make another one?"

"Are you sure? I don't want to ruin anything," he backed away, glancing at the sink and thinking about the clumped mixture making their way to the sewer.

"Yes. Can you reach for that sugar? That's flour, Rafe, god, yes, yes, okay, c'mere," she rolled her eyes, taking the container from him and dumping the content into the dried bowl. "Now, what do we do?"

"Put water?"

(Y/N) laughed, tilting her head to one side, trying to clutch her stomach from hurting. "Yeah, if you want the kids to get sick."

"Okay, Gordon, what should we do next?" he grunted, but he liked the lightness in the air. How the conversation flowed easily, and how quick he regained her trust to help her make whatever this is.

It was like she didn't care about the Rafe Cameron that gets into fights with the pogues or snorts coke when he's stressed. He felt like staying in this moment forever, wanting to help her bake whatever and watching her smile.

(Y/N) handed him the butter, muttering something along the words of 'dump them in', 'use the mixture', 'you're going to break your arms' and 'watch while it's whisking'.

He didn't care about the many orders she was giving him - he enjoyed it. He truly liked how his night was ending after a long day of bullshit, starting with his college sending him a letter for the vandalism he had caused outside of the Dean's office, Kelce and Topper going on a road trip without him and giving him the explanation of 'we asked you, and you said no'.

In truth, he didn't even remember anything about meeting them. His memory was starting to fade, and he shuddered at the thought of not knowing anyone when he reaches Ward's age.

"Okay, that's enough," she groaned, switching the button off. Rafe apologized quickly, being so caught up with his own thoughts, and waited for her next order.

"Choose the colour," she exclaimed happily, pointing out two different food dyes. "I can't choose!"

Rafe skimmed over the label that said 'blue' and 'pink', and made a face. "Are you going to give the blue ones to the boys and the pinks to the girls or something?"

"What? No?"

"Okay. . . why can't we just use both?"

"And make purple?"

"Yeah? Hey, look, I'm wearing blue and you're wearing pink!"

(Y/N) looked down to the ribbed top, noticing the colour, and her face turned into a red shade. Now everything's going to be awkward.

"Okay, purple it is," she rolled her eyes, giving him the blue bottle and taking the pink one for herself. "Three drops together. Are you ready?"

"Mhm."

"1."

Rafe licked his lips, so eager to watch the colour forming.

"2," she looked at him, and back to the frosting. "Rafe!"

"What?" he raised a brow, following her gaze and watching the blue dots on the frosting. He put his hand over his mouth, too stunned to say anything. "Oh my god, I'm so-"

(Y/N) laughed out loud, this time with her hands gripping onto the kitchen counter to stabilize herself, her mind rewinding back to his expression when he found out what he just did.

"Ha-ha, now you're just being an asshole," he rolled his eyes, but he was glad he had made her laugh. Instinctively, her laugh had made him feel better, and all of his worries dissipated into the air.

After a while, she tried to get ahold of herself to put the pink drops in, but failing to do so as his face kept appearing in her mind. Rafe groaned, having to wait for a few minutes now, and pulled her to feet. He pushed her against the counter, her back against his front as he trapped her.

"Don't laugh."

(Y/N) bit her lips, being in this position but not for what they usually do, and concentrated on dropping 3 drops of pink into the bowl. She cheered when she was done, pulling his hand away to move to the other side. The back of her neck was still hot, and she could still feel his arms around her.

"Mix it," Rafe smiled, leaning against the counter to watch as the mixer whisked the frosting, turning the pearly white colloid to a beautiful dark purple.

"It's dark!" she groaned, but she thought about how it still looked good, though it wasn't her expectation. Her job was almost finished now, and she could hear her bed calling.

"Now, the fun part," she smiled, taking her icing materials and placing them before his eyes. She watched as he laughed, being so excited as if he was a toddler seeing a playground for the first time.

"They used these in Cake Wars," he said proudly, showing her a nozzle.

"Stop with your Cake Wars," she mumbled, preparing the icing bag and giving Rafe one. "Put some frosting- not yet, Rafe, God, do you ever wait? Don't fill the bags too much, just in the middle, yes, just like that, and, wait, let me do mine."

She showed him how to do the perfect icing, practicing on a clean plate and asking him to do the same. He scoffed at her, saying how he got this, but what appeared was nothing more than a crooked line.

"That's nice," she muttered, sighing. "For a coming-out party."

Rafe groaned, trying to copy her artwork, and by the time it was 12.03 a.m., he had managed a copy of hers. Not literal, but there was a hint of hers in his.

"Okay. Now, Rafe, we'll make this quick. I do 80 cupcakes, and you do 20. Is that okay?"

"Yes, ma'am," he said, concentrating on his piping bag. He watched as she did the first cupcake, ending her icing perfectly and exclaiming happily as she put it aside. She looked at him, waiting.

"Don't look at me, you're making me nervous," he mumbled, and leaned to decorate the cupcake. It took him a total of 2 minutes, stopping at times and getting a yell from (Y/N), saying how he should not stop, and the result was impressive. At least to him.

"This will probably be in the rejected part of a bakery, you know, that they'll sell with a discount."

"Not everyone can do arts, (Y/N)," he rolled his eyes, but he truly enjoyed the joke.

It was nearing one in the morning when Rafe saw her sighing in relief, placing the last cupcake into the pastry box and safely storing them in the refrigerator. Her hair was in a bun, he had helped her put them up, and when she refused to let him help her, he gave her a poke.

"What? It's not like it's my first time putting your hair up."

"God, Rafe, you're impossible."

His eyes were almost shut, being so tired after being a cake decorator, and all he wished for was to pull her into her bed and sleep until the morning greets them. He waited until she was done cleaning all of the utensils, walking tiredly towards to him to wake him up.

"Get change, Rafe, I'm not letting you sleep in my bed with that shirt and that sweatpants."

"It's not a problem before," he mumbled, allowing himself to be pulled by her to the bedroom. He removed his shirt weakly, pulling off his sweatpants and jumping into the bed as soon as she closed the light. (Y/N) giggled lightly, noticing how adorable he was being, and she pinched his cheeks before she could stop herself.

"Take off your clothes."

"I'm not going to take off my clothes," she laughed, pulling down her shorts and getting into the bed beside him. She finally laid her back against the mattress, letting out the biggest relief ever as she tried to get comfortable.

He pulled her close towards him, breathing into her scent. She smelled like cupcakes, and he loved it.

"I'm going to the children's home with you."

"What?" she pulled a face, because she wasn't sure if she had heard him right. There was no way Rafe Cameron would ever step his foot into a children's home, what more to give out dark purple cupcakes.

"I'm going to the children's home with you. To give them cupcakes."

(Y/N) smiled and kissed his cheeks. "Okay."

"And we should do this again."

"Okay."

"Goodnight, Rafe," she laughed lightly, placing another peck before closing her eyes.

He placed a long kiss fully on her lips, feeling the butterflies soaring in his stomach. "Goodnight, (Y/N)."

taglist is close atm until i figure out wtf is up with tumblr :(

@okayshoto @joselyn001 @onceuponateenagetrash @dyingsleep @im19yearsold @iwannabeapogue @meaganjm @rafesobxs @flossy2929 @drewstarkeyluver @unfortunatekiwitrash @Mellifluouszayn @hhishho @hvrcruxes @scottybitch @asimpwriter @starxqt @amaya124 @Made212 @adriee16 @eggirl @tommy-tommo @thatshithurted8 @beyatch012 @fallincindy @marvelwhor3 @rafeswh0ree @kookap @supernaturallydc-blog @blank-velvet @alaniskauany @lumzs @kiiim8 @witchywrter @kaitlyn2907 @heyimflo @overcookedpastasause @tsukkiswifeey @spidey-d00d @anonymousobxfan @gotmeinloveagain @chicagoblackhawkslover96 @lexi-writes @Emmalvei_03 @classydragonthingknight @belongtoyou-u

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron imagines #drew starkey #drew starkey x reader #drew starkey imagines #rafe cameron smuts #rafe cameron fluff #outerbanks #outerbanks imagines #outerbanks x reader

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favoniuscodex · 3 years

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masquerade. [ diluc x reader ]

prompt: you’ve never liked people who stick their noses where they don’t belong. but, then again, you’re a hypocrite, for you fell in love with diluc ragnvindr. well, that and the fact that you’re just trying to figure out how he’s alive when you buried him three years ago. (”you’re adorable” for my 2.5k follower event) pairing: anti-hero/villain(?)!diluc / knight of favonius!f!reader warnings: mentions of death, alcohol word count: 2.2k words

a/n: stepping a bit out of my comfort zone for this one, but god, this was fun to write. my diluc favoritism shines once more fjdskfd. this feels like it should be the start of a long fic, but tbh,,, hmm ?? idk !!! would y’all be interested in that?

it was only a matter of time until you saw diluc again. surely, you hadn’t expected it to take three years, but seeing your supposedly-dead lover at a masquerade party? such theatrics were only ingrained into his bloodline. the darknight hero loved to be in the spotlight, as long as nobody knew the person behind his actions. of course, it was only in diluc ragnvindr’s nature to make his reappearance into society at one of teyvat’s biggest yearly events: fontaine’s very own moonlit masquerade, a ball intended for the likes of government officials and greedy socialites.

under normal circumstances, diluc would have been extended a proper invite, much like you had been gifted one. you, captain of a battalion of mondstadt’s finest soldiers, were high both within the ranks of teyvat’s political and social sphere. what elevated you to your highest status, however, was your former affiliation with diluc himself. you were the former fiancée of the ragnvindr heir, only having had your title severed through his rather untimely death alongside his father.

as diluc’s almost widow, you had both inherited his estate and the responsibility of burying him. which is why, of course, you nearly dropped your flute of champagne that had once rested comfortably between your fingers as an oh-so-familiar voice leaned in behind you and murmured softly into your ear.

“would you care for a dance?”

you whirled around, the golden beverage sloshing onto the ground from the sudden movement, and came face-to-face (or rather, mask-to-mask) with eyes that you had longed to see every day for the last three years. if this is some sick joke, you thought, if this karma for how i failed to protect him, then let barbatos strike me down now.

yet, no flash of green anemo energy came. rather, you were greeted by the parting of his lips to reveal a familiar set of brilliantly white teeth as the corners of his lips upturned into a devilish grin. it was unbecoming to see such a serpentine expression painting your lover’s face and it only served to form a pit in your stomach. despite the mask, you knew beyond all certainty that this was diluc ragnvindr.

but, you also knew it wasn’t your diluc ragnvindr. that diluc had died the day you buried him, even if diluc himself was standing in front of you at this very moment. rather than respond, you press your lips into a firm line as a multitude of emotions pass over you. even if you wanted to respond, you weren’t sure if you could wrack your brain for anything coherent to say. you stare silently into the eyes of diluc ragnvindr, which were once vibrant like unpicked cherries glistening in the summer sun. now, they were no warmer than the chilled wine he had once derived his fortune from.

you look at the eyes of your lover. another man stares back. as the two of you dance with the silence between you, rather than each other, diluc’s smile inevitably drops before he clears his throat.

“might we talk elsewhere?” his voice is less sultry and less playful. like a professional wine taster, you knew how to read the hints of emotion within diluc’s tone. even after years apart, you still knew how to discern the flavors that carefully interwove themselves into each syllable that fell from his lips. in this moment, the bittersweet aftertaste of vulnerability shines through.

and with that, your steely resolve breaks as you spoke your following words.

“upstairs. down the hall and to the left, there should be an empty meeting room. no nation has claimed it as their space for the evening, so it should be devoid of any people. go there, i’ll meet you there in ten minutes,” you instruct and the dumb, arrogant smile appears on diluc’s face once more as he nods at you before quietly slipping away.

you briefly consider slapping it off before he can go, but just like before, you let him slip through your fingers once more.

precisely ten minutes later, you walk into the designated meeting room, having excused yourself from an enlightening conversation with one of sumeru’s top scholars. despite the short discussion, your talking partner had been rather intriguing, but you had bigger problems to deal with. letting out a sigh before entering the room, you take note of the way diluc, who leaned against one of the walls, stands straight up upon your entrance.

at least he had that respect.

you close the door behind you and, for good measure, you lock it. as the lock clicks shut, you hear the noise of diluc unclipping his mask. you flutter your eyes shut and inhale before turning to see what you had longed to see the most over the past three years: the face of your dead fiancé. a scar mars his cheek. it is faint, but the sight of it grounds your thoughts, for you know that he is not a ghost, nor is he the man he used to be.

he has changed.

your heart leaps at the sight of the man you once loved, the only man you thought you could ever love, the man whose last name you had taken on out of honor after his death, even if the wedding plans had been cut short. but your brain scowls at the sight, wanting nothing to do with him. it screams within you, demanding attention over the way your heart beats rapidly and urges you to rush forward into your lover’s arms and hold him close.

diluc takes a step forward, but he seemingly senses your trepidation as a brief flash of uncertainty crosses over his face. he makes no move to close the distance between the two of you. neither do you. diluc parts his lips to speak, but you hold up a hand for him to stop.

“no.” you say, voice resolute. “i talk first.”

diluc visibly swallows as you unclip your mask, only to be met with your irate expression.

“three years. it has been three years. where were you?” your voice is steely and you smooth over any shakiness in your words with your anger, filling in the cracks with bitterness.

“(y/n), i’m sorry, but i-” he begins, but you take a step forward, your scowl worsening.

“cut the bullshit and answer the question i asked you, diluc.” you snap and diluc’s eyes widen, as if he’s somehow just registering that a simple apology wouldn’t be enough to immediately woo you back to his side.

“i was hiding in the inazuman countryside and i only did so becau-” he begins, but you cut him off once more.

“thank you.” you say dismissively, waving off any additional words he has to say. the corner of his lips twitch with amusement, but you elect to ignore such a thing, for the sake of your own temper. “i only have one more question. why did you come back?”

hurt mars diluc’s expression as he registers the embittered tone of your words, but, much like you, quickly smooths his own expression over to one of indifference. yet, the affection he holds for you still shines bright in his eyes. you hate it. most of all, you hate the way your stomach does backflips at the sight.

“i came back for you.” diluc confesses, finally realizing that any longer of a statement and you would have cut him off. a sharp bark of a laugh exits your lips as you stare at him.

“it’s been three years. you could have come back at any time. and yet, you waited three years. pardon me if i don’t necessarily believe you.” you scoff, turning your body slightly away from him.

“it’s always been you. i had to do this to protect you. my father and i, we discovered things that we shouldn’t and he got killed because of it. i was next. if they didn’t get me, they would have come after you first.” diluc explains. you listen to his explanation wordlessly, before glaring at him.

“who is they and what makes you think i couldn’t handle them?” you snap and diluc’s expression contorts as if he expects his next words to cause you pain.

“ordo favonius,” diluc says, voice quiet. much to his surprise, you laugh. it was the laugh he had fallen in love with, yet it is different. a shell of what it used to be. he wonders if this is what his absence did to you -- or if it is the result of his return. he’s not sure which answer is worse.

“really? really? that’s the best bullshit lie you can come up with?” you say, folding your arms over your chest as you look at him incredulously. “the knights of favonius don’t want to kill you nor your father, nor me or anyone else you might know. they’re harmless.”

“no, they’re not. they’re wolves in sheep’s clothing, you have to believe me.” there’s an unfamiliar desperation in his tone that pulls at your heartstrings, but despite his earnestness, his words still play the wrong notes. you aren’t convinced. your eyebrows scrunch in thought before you turn to look at him, eyes narrowed.

“diluc,” you begin, words cautious. “are you the one who attempted to assassinate grand master varka?”

the acting grand master had returned to mondstadt from his expedition last month. not even a week later, an assassination attempt had been made on his life. much to everyone’s surprise, the organization, especially varka himself, refused to release details about the attacker. if diluc was the attacker, then the knights were seemingly scared of revealing that he was. but... why?

doubt finally plants its seeds in your stomach, but you know you can’t make any brash decisions tonight. not now, not when you know there are good people within the organization. jean, the dandelion knight, the one whom you had cried to after diluc’s death. albedo, the calm and collected alchemist and his younger sister klee, the knights’ resident spark knight. kaeya, diluc’s own estranged brother, whom had not contested your inheritance of the ragnvindr fortune and had gone so far as to decline any amount of money you offered him as his rightful share. they were all good people. they wouldn’t stand for such corruption. would they?

no. you think. they wouldn’t. they’re not safe either.

diluc is lying. he has to be. he wouldn’t have stood idly by for the last three years if such good people were all in danger. he wouldn’t have stood by for the last three years if you were in danger. would he?

your former lover notices the way your expression alters with each new thought that passes through your mind, so he closes the distance between the two of you and places a hand on your shoulder.

“come with me, darling,” diluc pleads. you refuse to meet his eyes, knowing you’ll break if you do so. “please. i can keep us safe.”

“i can defend myself,” you snap, but your words sound hollow, as if you’re trying to convince yourself. his hand doesn’t leave your shoulder, but you make no move to shrug it off. his refusal to answer your question gives you the answer you need. “why did you try to kill him?”

“he is not the root of the problem, but he is one of the main pieces of it. i cannot explain here, but if you come with me, i can. i promise, i swear to you that i can. just... please. we don’t have much time, they’ll notice your absence from the party soon.”

hadn’t he also promised to love you? love does not mean abandoning me for three years, you think bitterly, yet your heart urges you to listen to your lover. you take a step back and diluc’s hand falls to his side. you finally meet his eyes with your own cold gaze. the warmth of his pyro vision that courses through him does nothing to soften their iciness. diluc’s expression is no longer stoic. he looks tired and utterly devastated by your rejection.

“you are as beautiful as you were the day we met,” diluc begins and you tear your gaze from him, unable to keep your eyes fixated on him any longer. “archons, even when you are angry with me, you are adorable. i lov-”

“don’t.” you murmur, finally turning away from him. “don’t say that.”

you walk over to the door, hand hovering over the handle. you stand there for a few moments and the silence between diluc and you is nearly suffocating. tears brim at the corners of your eyes, yet you reapply your masquerade mask to hide them from any partygoers. you let out a soft sigh.

“five days. meet me in mondstadt in five days. as to whether or not i’ll go with you, i’ll give you my answer then,” you murmur, before slamming your hand down on the handle and exiting the room at a brisk pace, head held high. five days of mourning was all you had been given in the first place. it is only fitting that you give him the same time period.

#not beta read btw just giving y'all a heads up #diluc x reader #genshin impact x reader #diluc #genshin impact

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souichioneshots · 3 years

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Grim Reaper 【Souichi x Reader】 (Fluff)

Souichi claims he's been cursed. Now everything he touches dies! However, that doesn't stop him from spending time with you. Can you hold back from touching the boy and dying? Let's find out~~~!! ahahaha

(I think this counts as affectionate!reader but idk lol)

Souichi carefully held onto the drink in his hand as he sat back down in between your legs.

Resting his body against your soft chest, you wrapped your arms around his waist. He was completely engulfed by your love. Although he was a bit embarrassed at first by how affectionate you could be, it had become a habit for him to want to be so close to you all the time.

【And now back to ‘DEATH’S ASSISTANT’】

Souichi took a sip of his drink as the show you two had been hooked on recently started back up.

It was a Japanese drama about a Grim Reaper who had been assigned a foreign assistant. Apparently, they fell for one another as soon as their eyes met. Every day they tell each other how much they love one another, but because of Death’s curse, he is unable to touch his love. The show depicts their everyday work lives. Showing how far they would go for one another to prove their love, but never being able to be truly affectionate. Souichi wasn’t really into these types of lovey-dovey dramas, but the supernatural antics that it included drew him in deeper and deeper.

【Assistant, we cant! You know if we touch, you’ll die!】

【I would risk dying a million times just to feel your lips pressed against mine even just once, Death~.】

“Guuuuu!!!!!!!!!!!”

Souichi laughed as you pressed your face into the crook of his neck. The scene was so cheesy and overdone, but you loved it. For a morbid girl, you really were a sucker for love stories.

“You’re gonna miss the show if you don’t look up.” Souichi chuckle and patted your head.

Resting your chin on his shoulder, you continued to watch the last few minutes left of the drama.

“Death really outdid it with his outfit today, huh?” Souichi commented.

In today’s episode, Death had been wearing a bright red suit with a black suit-shirt instead of his usual black suit and black tie.

“I think it really suits him.”

“You think everything suits him.”

“Of course. If you’re handsome, then anything and everything looks good on you.”

Souichi lifted his shoulder up towards his head, squishing your face against him.

“Owwww Owowowow!!”

“What’s so handsome about that old actor?”

Souichi finally released the pressure, allowing you to relax.

Pulling your head away from his body, you rubbed your cheeks.

“Hmm…Well, for one his eyes are absolutely beautiful. Thin, sharp, and the dark circles around them make him look so mysterious. And his dark, wavy hair looks so soft! I just want to run my hands through it as mess it up even more.”

Souichi couldn’t help but let out a small laugh as you described what you found attractive about the ‘dreamy man’ on the television. He honestly felt like you were just describing him. He knew you must have a type, but he didn’t think it would be this similar to him every time. You must have felt like you won the jackpot with him.

“But what I really like is the fact that he’s always wearing a suit.” Wrapping your arms back around his waist, you squeezed him a bit “You can tell his assistant also thinks the same thing because she's always staring at him. She just wants to touch him soooo much. But she knows she'll die if she does! Haa~~ I love it!”

Souichi hummed in amusement as he listened to you speak.

Seeing that he fit all the other conditions you looked for in a guy, Souichi thought of a perfect way he could use this little fantasy you love so much for his amusement.

＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿

When the next night came, Souichi quickly got to preparing himself. He had asked if he could go over to watch a movie tonight.

He usually didn’t pay much attention to what he wore whenever he hung out alone with you. But tonight, he decided to mix things up a bit.

Making sure he had everything he needed in his pockets, Souichi set off to your house.

Creepily excited laughter slipped from the boy’s lips as he walked down the street by himself. He couldn’t wait to see your reaction when you laid your eyes upon him.

Finally reaching your front door, he knocked.

“Good evening~” Souichi greeted as you opened the door.

Before you could greet the boy back, you froze. Your mouth gaped open and your eyes widened as you looked upon your boyfriend.

“S…SS..S-Suit..Suitsuitsuit…” You brought your hands up to your face, unsure where to place them. This was the first time you had ever seen him wearing such an outfit before.

Finally bringing your hands out towards Souichi, you tried to touch him.

“Ah!” Souichi quickly jumped back. “You can’t.”

A look of worry and confusion grew on your face as the boy rejected your touch.

“Remember when I called you this morning and said I might have messed up a curse?”

You shook your head yes.

“Well, it turns out that as a side effect, whatever I touch now dies almost immediately.”

Leaning against the doorframe, you looked at the boy with a smile of disbelief.

“You’re just copying ‘Death’s Assistant’ aren’t you.”

Souichi hated how well you could read him. But that didn’t mean he was going to admit that you were right. At least not right now.

“No! I swear.” Sliding one hand into his suit pocket, he leaned down onto the grass that covered your front yard. “Every time I touch something as delicate as a flower…” Pulling out his hand from his pocket, he placed it over a daisy that had been growing for some time. “Well... This happens.” Moving back up, Souichi revealed that the flower he touched had shriveled up and died.

“No way…” You whispered as he allowed the dead flower to trickle onto the palm on your hands.

“Yeah…It’s a bummer.” Placing his foot over the real flower still planted in the ground, he tried to hide the evidence. “But I’m sure this curse will wear off by next week. 2 weeks at most.”

You quickly moved to the side as Souichi let himself into your home.

“What are you doing? Wouldn’t it be dangerous for us to be together right now?”

“I’m sure we’ll be fine. As long as we don’t touch that is.” Giving you a smile, Souichi kicked off his shoes and made his way down to your bedroom.

As the raven-haired boy walked down the hall, he moved his hands close to the wall, just barely coming into contact with the wallpaper. He honestly thought it would be really cool if he could make the wallpaper roll up and crumble into pieces just from touching it. Just like in the drama. Perhaps there really was a curse out there that would give him that ability.

Finally reaching your room, he took ahold of the door handle and gestured for you to go in first. Being in a suit really did make him feel like more of a gentleman. It was kind of fun.

Sitting on your bed, Souichi watched as you set up the DVD player.

He tried to hold back his foolish laughter as he thought about how miserable you were going to be all night from not being able to touch him.

You. The girl who could barely go 5 minutes without at least leaning against his shoulder, was now being forced to keep her hands to herself in order to avoid never waking up again.

This was gonna be hilarious.

“So, lemme ask you.” You pulled the boy out of his own little world as you sat on the bed with him. “Why the suit?”

“The suit? Oh. Umm…” Souichi’s mind froze for a second. He was going to say an excuse that all his other clothes suddenly turn to dust when he touched them, but now that sounded extremely stupid and unbelievable. Especially since he was able to touch your bedsheets with no problem. “…To match the whole ‘death’ theme...”

“Oh~ That makes sense. Always gotta be prepared for a funeral when everything you touch dies, right?”

“Exactly!”

Souichi let out a small sigh of relief as you commented an equally believable reason for the suit. He was glad you were almost always on the same level as him.

Finally dropping the subject, you pressed the button on the remote for the movie to play.

Souichi tapped his finger against the bed in annoyance as you kept a good amount of distance from him. It didn’t seem like you would try to touch him any time soon.

Looks like he needed to take things up a notch if he wanted to have some real fun.

Leaning forward, he swiftly took off his black jacket. You quickly ducked as his hand almost came in contact with your head.

Leaning his arm on your pillow, he relaxed his body. A single nail stayed poking out from between his lips, making it look like he was smoking.

Souichi couldn't help but smile as he saw you take quick glances at him. Your eyes kept moving from his pants to his white suit shirt, and finally to his face. He could see a blush spread across your cheeks as you quickly turned away from him, avoiding his gaze. You looked completely head over heels for him.

Sliding to the side, you leaned ever so close to the boy.

“Does the ‘being killed on the spot’ rule apply even over clothes~?” A blush spread across his pale face as you whispered in his ear, making sure not to come into direct contact with his shoulder. He could see your hand hovering over his suit pants, craving to touch the expensive-looking material.

Did you really not believe him or were you just begging to die?

Moving a bit away from you, he replied. “Probably not a good idea. Haven’t tested that out yet…” He let out a little laugh as he mentioned how awkward it would be for him to have to wake up your family and tell them that he killed you by accident.

Souichi looked from the corner of his eyes as you let out a small sigh and moved back into your own little space. This sudden rule of no touching looked like it was taking a toll on you.

Honestly, he was expecting you to be a bit more excited by this situation. After all, this was one of your favorite fantasies. To love one another, but never be able to touch unless you were willing to die on the spot. You should be spewing cheesy lines like in the drama, not sulking.

Moving the nails against his teeth, he tried to think of a way to fix things. After all, this wouldn’t be fun if you got too sad and decided to stop acting like your usual self halfway through the night.

Moving his arm out towards you, he pulled on the edge of his suit jacket.

“I think it’d be fine if you held onto this though…” He turned his face to the side, trying to hide his blush as you smiled once again.

Throughout the movie, Souichi kept his arm up in the air as you happily held onto his jacket. His body felt oddly unsatisfied from not being properly touched by you. But, this was his own fault for deciding to go through with such a cold prank.

You both stayed surprisingly calm and silent as the movie played on.

Souichi kept the nails in his mouth pressed tightly against his teeth as he kept his eyes on the screen. The movie you chose wasn’t half bad at all. The effects, the props, the acting. All very realistic. To be expected from new foreign movies.

However, this feeling of calmness didn’t last long as an unnecessarily long make-out scene between the main characters had started up again. Another specialty of foreign horror movies. The acting for these scenes just had to be extremely believable as well…

Souichi tensed up a bit as he felt you let go of his jacket, finally allowing him to rest his hand back down near his body.

It wasn’t that he disliked these types of scenes. But something about watching them alone with you always made him feel a bit restless.

Souichi moved his legs closer to his body, trying to get in a more comfortable position. He really regretted starting this whole ‘touch me and you’ll die’ prank now.

Pulling on the black-tie wrapped around his neck, he tried to calm himself down.

“People get really horny right before they die, huh?…”

Souichi noticed you jolt a bit at the sound of his voice. All he got in response from you was a little ‘yeah’ and an awkward laugh.

As the teens on the screen started to undress, Souichi noticed you also start to fidget around in your spot. You looked like you wanted to sit closer to him, but you knew you couldn’t.

Shakily bringing your hand over his leg again, you whispered. “Are you sure I’ll die if I touch you over your clothes?...”

This time he didn’t say anything. Instead, he just moved his leg closer to you, giving you an okay to try and touch him.

He watched as you cautiously placed the tips of your fingers on his knee. You let out a sigh of relief as you realized you were going to die from touching him over his clothes.

Careful not to accidentally touch any part of his body not covered by his clothes, you turned towards his.

Pinching the fabric of his suit jacket, you pulled his hand up. Souichi’s heartbeat sped up as you moved his bare hand to touch your clothed breast.

“Looks like it works both ways. As long as your skin doesn’t come into direct contact with mine, I’ll be just fine.”

Souichi’s eyes followed your hands as they moved back towards his pants once more.

You were really pushing the envelope.

But, if you were gonna play like that, then he saw no harm in playing along as well.

Sliding his hand down from your chest to your waist, he pulled you to come closer to him.

“That means we can’t do anything more than this though…” Souichi whisper as he inched his face closer to yours. “We should stop now before we do something that can’t be undone.” He teased you with lies, practically ordering you to go further.

“You don’t wanna die from one of my curses, do you?”

“It’d be a blessing to die from one of your curses…”

Something within Souichi switched on as he heard you whisper your confession to him. That felt like the most romantic thing you'd ever said to him.

Without saying another word, Souichi pressed his lips against yours. To think he was the one who ended up not being able to hold back from you this time.

Suddenly, pressing your hands against his shoulder, you pushed yourself away from the kiss.

“Agk! My heart!” Holding your hand against your chest, you threw yourself back to lay on the bed. “I…I!!! Gah…”

Souichi couldn’t help but laugh as you pretended to die in an over-exaggerated manner.

You opened one of your eyes, looked at the boy, and then closed it again. Souichi could see you trying your best to hold back a smile as you laid perfectly still.

“You knew I wasn’t cursed the entire time, didn’t you?”

“...Was it that obvious?” You laughed a bit as you finally sat back up.

“When did you figure out I was lying?”

“Hmm~”

You just hummed and swayed your head side to side. Not telling him when you knew for a fact he was not actually cursed.

“If I can be honest, you should have said something more believable for the suit. Then maybe I would have believed you completely." Leaning up against the boy you thought for a second. "Like umm... All your other clothes disintegrated the second you touched them. But because you've worn this suit to a funeral before, it was the only thing that stayed intact."

"Ahh!! I swear I was gonna say that!!"

You let out a hum and looked at the boy once again with a smile of disbelief.

"I swear!"

Getting up from the bed, he put on his suit jacket again.

"Let's restart." He sat back down on the edge of your bed. "Ask me why I'm wearing a suit."

"Okay." You also moved to sit on the edge, next to him. "Hey, Souichi. Why are you--" Unconsciously, your hand brushed up against his. "AGK!" You threw your body back and pretended to die again.

"No!! Y/N!!" He picked you up by your shoulders and forced you to sit back up. "Again."

As his hands moved away from your shoulders, he accidentally touched your neck. Making you jump back again.

"Agggkk!!"

"Stop dying!!" He yelled as you held your hand up to your neck and pretended to choke and die.

Souichi let out a loud groan as you continued to laugh at his frustrated expression.

This prank wasn't as funny as he thought it would be.

#souichi x reader #souichi tsujii x reader #fluff #this is stupid #but oh well #lots of misspells for sure #but i tried man #10 pages of work is a pain to check

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kimnjss · 3 years

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tricky part | knj

⤑ series: plot twist

⤑ pairing: rapper!namjoon x rich girl!reader

⤑ genre: fluff?? (idk, man. i think they’re cute.) ahem, some smut... nd we get a little angsty, of course.

⤑ rating: explicit

⤑ word count: 8.1K // unedited.

⤑ warnings: (mentions of alcohol abuse). slight dirty talk, cursing, fingering, nipple play, handjob, unprotected sex, cumshot, doggy style, light hair pulling, multiple orgasms... i think that’s it.

⤑ chapter song: tonight (i wish i was your boy) - the 1975 (the entire song is namjoon is swear...)

⤑ A/N: hiiii! this is wicked late ., i took a nap today nd it was amazing . let me know what you think !! x

MAY 10TH, 2020 | 17:09

It takes longer than usual for you to get ready, stuck in the mirror contemplating whether or not what you're wearing is good enough. If maybe you should put your hair up instead of letting it fall freely. Would it be showing too much? But you wanted to show a little, right? This was a date after all, who didn't tease a little on the first date?

But this was Namjoon. Sensible, cautious, easily frazzled Namjoon. Would it turn him off? Or fluster him so he's showing off that cute dimpled smile of us. The one that he let slip when without even noticing it, cheeks flushing pink as he tried to avoid eye contact. Gosh, he was so cute!

Okay! Perfect solution, you're thinking as your eyes find the hair elastic on your dresser. You'd bring the hair tie and feel things out, read the room, and with the first desire to jump his bones, you'd tie your hair up. Giving him a perfect look at your shimmery collarbones, thank you Fenty, and the slope of your neck. No doubt he'd find himself thinking about pressing his lips against your skin at the sight of it.

Boys were simple. All of them. A mere flash of skin and they were putty in your hands. Joon was cute with it, though. So you'd let it slide.

Your phone lights up, humming against your sheets. His name flashes in bold, waking up the butterflies in the pit of your stomach. Weird. He must be here, no doubt outside waiting for you right now. He'd think you looked nice, right? Grant you one of his lingering stares that he's always so quick to avert.

That's when you knew you caught his eye. Pride warms your chest each and every time you're catching him. It took a little bit more effort to get Namjoon to turn his head. Yet, he was still a boy at the end of it. He'd end up looking at you one way or another, it's all about how you present it.

Which is exactly why you were yellow. A yellow two-piece that highlights the best parts of you. And you're sure you've made the right decision when you catch the stutter in his step, eyes flickering from your face to your legs then back again. Forcing himself not to look away the entire time you're walking up to him, black platform heels carrying you with ease. Only a few inches below him with them on.

“Hi,” You're saying with a grin, hand reaching out to grasp his bicep. Giving it a little squeeze and watching the way his eyes go wide. He's wearing sweats but still looks so good. As if he's stood in front of you in a three-piece suit, although you might be exaggerating.

He doesn't shake you off but doesn't exactly relax in your touch either. Fingers tapping against his thigh and you can't help but wonder if he's holding himself back from touching you. Lame. “You're wearing yellow,” He says after a moment, stating it as fact rather than something that was intentionally done for him and his attention.

Eyes rolling on a laugh, you're nodding your head. “Yeah. You like yellow,”

“I do,” His nod is curt and his tone is military.

Huffing, while stepping forward, easily pulling him a bit close to you. “Okay, rule number on to this date...” Lifting a single finger for reference. His eyes flicker to it before he's looking back down at you. “You're not allowed to think tonight, got it? No analyzing, calculating. Weighing the options. Just do and talk, get loose.” Giving his shoulder a playful shake, you're shocked to hear the laugh that falls from his lips.

Like an actual, really pretty laugh. “Alright, deal.” A proud smile threatens to split your face when you feel his hand lift, hesitant at first but landing on the small of the back. Albeit, just to guide you, but it's still something. “Let's get going,” He's guiding you with the gentle hand on your back, barely touching you but you're stomach was doing backflips.

How quickly the roles reversed. Hands clasped in front of you, urging yourself to calm down. To stop acting like some thirteen year old who still hasn't had their first kiss. You were twelve years and eighteen kisses past that. Get it together.

“Where's your car?” Stepping on your tiptoes, attempting to peak up the street to spot it. “Actually, what kind of car do you even drive? I've never seen it?” Eyes shifting up toward him, a quizzical look on your face.

You're missing the soft, “I don't...” That falls from his lips because you're brain is working overtime to guess what car he could possibly drive. “Hm, you kinda look like a Chevy guy... maybe a Honda? But, I could be wrong. Definitely not a sports car, though.” You couldn't imagine Joon in one of those loud, low to the ground car.

Whipping through traffic as if where he had to go was much more important than all the other people on the road. Yeah, that didn't fit.

He's taking offense to this for some reason, nose scrunching, and hands finding his hips. His steps even come to a halt. “Hey. Why not a sports car?”

You're letting out a laugh, not at him, of course. Just at how adorable he looks right now. Actually pouting, with his arms crossed in the middle of the sidewalk. You've never seen him like this, not even sure where this new Joon came from. But he might be even cuter than the Joon you knew and had a huge crush on.

Moving toward him, not even bothering to stop yourself from poking his pouted lip. “Come on, that's totally out of character. You're practical and sensible. You wouldn't splurge on a sports car, that's not even durable. Those cars get torn apart in accidents,” He's not really mad, obviously. Which is why it doesn't take long for him to lose the face.

“So which one is it? Honda or Chevy?”

A large arm is dropping around your shoulder, tucking you into his side as the two of you continue your timed steps down the sidewalk. “Neither. I don't have a car. Or my license,” Eyes nearly popping out of your head with his words, stopping in your tracks to get a good look at him. Just in case you might've heard him wrong.

But he shows no signs of correcting himself or clarifying what he had just said. “Wait. So how are we going to get there!?” Did he expect you to walk!? All the way to Daejeon? In these shoes... they were cute, but not the most comfortable. And they didn't need to be because they weren't meant for walking 100 miles at a time!

“We're gonna take the train, of course. How else?” He's not even looking like he knows he's talking nonsense.

Like, honestly. Did he expect you to ride a gross train dressed like this!? What if you got robbed? Or kidnapped? Or worse, thrown up on!? This outfit was irreplaceable, one of a kind. No way could you take it on a train, that wouldn't do. “No. That won't be necessary. I'll just call one of my drivers, they'll come get us,” You've got your phone out before you're even finishing your sentence.

Namjoon is quick to pluck the device from your fingers, a sly smile playing on his features as he tucks it into his pocket. “Let those people spend time with their families. It's Sunday. There won't even be that many people,” Two firm hands placed on your shoulders, he's turning you effortlessly. “The train, it'll be fun.”

“You're the only guy, in the universe that thinks riding the train will be fun.” He's laughing again and it's not cute as it was a few minutes ago. “Oh no, I meant fun for me. You're gonna hate it,”

MAY 10TH, 2020 | 17:37

Just as you predicted, the train is gross. And sticky. Crowded and sweaty. Joon holds you close as you weave through the sea of people, fingers laced with yours. Although you know it's purely for survival purposes, the flutter in your heart still rises from feeling the warmth of his skin against yours.

You try not to make a huge deal about it. People rode the train every day and considering how many of them were in here, they've all survived. You'd be fine. Especially with this six-foot angel clearing the way for you at every turn.

Joon finds a seat for the both of you against the wall. Close with your thighs pressed together and he still hasn't released your hand from his grasp. It's cozy beside him, warm. Leaning your weight on to him, you try to be subtle but probably fail. He's concentrating on something on his phone and from the quick peak you were able to sneak, you see he's checking on your reservation for tonight.

Stomach flipping at the tiny fact he made a reservation for you two. It's so Namjoon to want to be triple prepared for anything, but the fact that it's in your favor makes you happy. No idea why, but that was the truth of the matter. More often than not happy when you were around him.

Even cramped in this stinky train, his hand in yours was enough to convince you, you were in the back of a limo. The unfocused chatter around you replaced with soft music that you'd play. Probably something he likes to listen to. His taste in music was quickly becoming yours the more time the two of you spent together.

He's dropping your hand for some reason that you don't realize until you're looking up to see him standing. Offering his spot to some brat with a broken leg. What the heck? Were you supposed to hold hands with this kid? Up without a word, didn't even bother to ask if you wanted him to get up.

Joining the other people standing, holding on to the railing and you're quickly deciding you don't like the distance. He watches as you stand to your feet, nose brushing against his chin. “Sit,” Gesturing to your now empty spot, earning a raised brow from him.

“Come on, Yn. Your feet are gonna hurt. Just relax,” He tries to lower you back into your spot, but you're moving to the side with a shake of your head. “I'll be fine. Just sit,” Catching the stubborn glint in your eye, just begging him to argue, he chooses to drop it. Switching spots with you and sinking into the empty spot.

Not even a second after he's settling into the cushion, you're dropping yourself onto his lap. Arm wrapped around his shoulders, legs between his. Bum pressed firmly into his thigh. “Did you really think I was going to stand?” You laugh. He doesn't even look the least bit surprised, eyes rolling – but you catch the smile on the corner of his lips.

His hand finds the outer part of your thigh, holding your body steady as the car jostles. He doesn't move it even after the machine has settled, has even taken to tapping out a rhythm against your skin.

It's nice. Your new favorite song.

MAY 10TH, 2020 | 21:17

You had to hand it to the guy, Kim Namjoon knew how to put a date together. Pure perfection from beginning to end, you're not sure if it's his careful attention to detail or the small possibility that he wanted to impress you... you've decided to go with the latter.

The entirety of dinner was spent talking about everything and nothing. Actually getting to know each other aside from the surface level, 'I make good music and you screen it while balancing your massive crush on me,'. He was telling you about the time he first met Yoongi: second year of high school, Yoongi was a really cool Senior, the type of cool guy that everyone knows, but like doesn't talk to anyone. He found Joon making out with some cheerleader in the band room, her hand down the front of his jeans... and made it all of his business to tease him about it for the rest of the semester.

Never would you have deemed Joonie as the type to take part in such excessive PDA, and although he insists it was not his idea... well, agree to disagree.

You were even telling him about the first time you got blackout drunk, which resulted in you being banned from every last Shake Shack. The only thing you remember from that night was getting in the car to head to the club, already started pre-gaming beforehand. But as Jungkook likes to tell it, you were a melting pot of 'types of' drunks.

Started the night trying to fistfight the bouncer, after only fifteen minutes in the club, which resulted in you... and all of your friends being kicked out. Went from not-so-discreetly trying to mount your boyfriend at the time, Jackson, to crying on the bathroom floor Shake Shack all before you were puking in the booth, after swearing (a million times) that you 'weren't gonna throw up'.

Followed by a screaming match between you and Hoseok as he apologized a thousand times over to the employee he had to call over for the mess, trying to assist her while she tried her best to keep a smile on her face. Jungkook carried you to the car, full-blown had to haul you over his shoulder as you screamed curses at your brother.

You don't remember any of that, though. Next thing you remember from that night after getting in the car to leave, was waking up to the sound of loud video games, hanging half-naked off the side of Jackson's bed.

You're more embarrassed than you though, telling that story out loud. how bad you used to be. That was the worst of it, but the other times weren't too great either. Of course, you've calmed down a bit. Really tried each and every time you were sent away to clean up your act. And you were good for a few months after you came back, and then you were not.

Surprisingly, Joon doesn't look disgusted when you tell him. And you're not sure if that's a good thing or not. Either he's extremely understanding or he was expecting your most embarrassing story to be something of the sort. You hope for the former but suspect the latter.

In reality, though. Namjoon found himself trying to figure out just what could've been going on in your life that you felt like any of that would help. He now knew with you there was always something hidden, a reason to your behavior that you oftentimes liked to brush off. Must've been bad. You probably had a hard time.

The highlight of the night, though, was hands down the play. You're not even sure if he knew what it was about when he chose it, but you were falling in love from the moment the current went up. Characters so vivid and engaging, dealing with real-life shit all while living in fear of the darkness that looms over their tiny village.

It wasn't hard for you to get totally immersed in the show, laughing along, getting upset, crying. And Joon stays seated by you the entire time, holding on to your hand. Not so sure when he picked it up, but he hasn't let it go in a while. Not that you were complaining. You liked the tiny shocks that followed every brush of his fingers.

He smiles when you laugh, laughs when you get upset, and wipes your tears when you cry. You're so sure, he missed the entire show.

MAY 10TH, 2020 | 21:20

“You know, my best friend's an actor. Kinda a big deal at his agency... I could talk to him?” Joon throws in casually as the two of you make your way out of the theater, talking as he tosses his empty popcorn carton into the garbage. As if he didn't just drop some life-changing news.

You've heard of his friend, Kim Taehyung. Was an extra in his very first big drama role, a historical one where he faced an untimely death. The two of you never crossed paths and shared zero scenes together, but it was still pretty cool. To you. He didn't know you from a hole in the wall and the last thing you'd do was act like anyone's biggest fan.

But, this? What Namjoon was offering... that could be huge. The start that you needed and you wouldn't even have to go through your father. You could do it all on your own... kinda. “Oh! That would be amazing, Joon!? Why didn't...”

As quickly as the excitement hits you, it's being knocked right out of your body. The job that you already have and everything else that surrounded it. No way could you accept this. “Actually,” You're forcing a smile for Namjoon to see, “Let's put a pin in it. I want to focus on the company,” You wonder if it sounds as robotic as it feels.

“Why? You hate that place?” His hand has found yours again, arms swinging slightly as you walk. There's this curious look on his face like you're not making any sense. And you're not.

Why wouldn't you jump on the first chance to ditch that hell hole? The opportunity was right in front of your face, so why wouldn't you take it? You must be an idiot. Stockholm Syndrome? “Can I tell you a secret?” You're whispering despite the fact it's just the two of you on the street.

“Sure,” Gently, he's pulling you just a bit off of the path. Figuring whatever you have to tell him might be something he wants to sit down for, so he's getting comfortable on a bench, tugging you down beside him.

Not once letting go of your hand. “Hoseok is putting out an album in a few months. He's been juggling that and work-work. The time when my dad came down to talk to me... about the whole Hyungwon thing, he said he'd tank the album if I didn't start acting right,” That actually does surprise Joon, eyes going wide as a barely audible gasp leaving his lips.

You can just about guess what he's thinking, 'what kind of father...?'. And the easy answer was, yours. Your type of father would. Your type of father has. “That's why I need to stay focused. I can't screw up, he's been working so hard. I wouldn't be able to live with myself I ruin everything for him. Again.” That was a story for another time.

“Yn. That's fucked up. Does Hobi know?”

Scoffing, your eyes roll automatically. “Of course not and don't tell him. He thinks our dad is the best. 'Strict, but the best'.” Your tone changes slightly to mock his deeper voice. “Thinks he's hard on me only because of how I act and while I know that doesn't help, that wouldn't change anything. We're all just pawns in his game. His stupid Legacy.”

It's weird because you don't even sound sad. Just numb. Like you've accepted that this was how the way things were and this was how they were going to be. He wished there was something he could do, stand up to your dad for you, tell him all the things you're afraid to. But that would be stupid, for him and for you. It wasn't his place and he'd only make it worse. No matter how badly he wanted to just step in, there was really only one thing he could do.

Your hand is much smaller in his, soft and cute. Nails painted a pretty deep blue to compliment the yellow of your dress. Squeezing softly, he's lifting his lips into a smile for you to see. And since he's been trying to take your advice and stop thinking so much, he's lifting your hand. Pressing feather-like kisses against your knuckles.

The gesture so sickeningly-sweet, you're not sure if you should puke or cry. Or both. He's looking up at you, smiling really wide before he's moving closer, lips finding your forehead making you feel warm all over. Butterflies holding a wrestling match in your stomach and you might just burst into tears.

“I can't interfere with your family. Especially when you're not asking me to. Just know, if you ever want to start doing what you really want I'll support it. I'll support you.” You feel the pressure building behind your eyes, the thickness in your throat. All over three stupid words that you had no idea you've been waiting to hear.

It's overwhelming. Desperately fighting back the wetness that teases your waterline. With a hard blink and a huff of air – you're pushing a smile onto your face. Aware of how fake it looks, but it'll have to do as you lean in to press a soft kiss to his cheek. “Thank you,” You're grinning, hand patting his knee before you're hopping up from your spot beside him on the bench.

A hand extended down to him. “Come on, dessert on me!” You giggle because it feels right. And he takes your hand, allowing you to pull him from to his feet. Tugging him along behind you with your face pointed to the night sky. Not saying anything until you're sure your voice won't break.

And even then it's a quiet mumble, “You've earned something sweet.”

MAY 10TH, 2020 | 21:59

Your hair has gone up. Revealing the slope of your neck and the shimmer on your collarbones. And as you predicted, Joon watches you through the entire process. Lips wrapped around your ice cream cone, holding it in place as your hands move quickly to pull your hair out of your face. His gaze dropping to your mouth as you lick mess the treat his left from your lips.

Hook. Line. And sinker.

“Do you have any weird kinks?” You don't even look at him when you say it, focus on creating a peak on your ice cream cone.

Joon's choking a cough out around his shaved ice, eyes blinking hard as he clears his throat, lifting his gaze up to you. “Excuse me, what!?” An easy laugh falls from your lips, shoulders shrugging slightly. Taking pride in how easily you could fluster. “You know... weird kinks. Things that get you going, but are kinda weird,”

“Like a fetish?” You're shrugging, barely interested in the choice of word. “I'm sure there's a difference, but for the sake of this. Sure,”

He had to have something, there was no way he didn't. Everyone had something and you refused to believe that he was even composed and well thought out in that area. There had to be something that made him lose his cool. Had to be.

“Uhm,” He's clearing his throat, cheeks seeming to grow darker the more time you spent staring at him. “I wouldn't say it's weird, but I like...” His attention falls to his dessert, twirling his spoon around in the frozen shavings. Would you think it was too weird? Consider it a deal-breaker and decide to not talk to him again. You probably wouldn't even care, there wasn't much that you cared about he was finding.

But, you could surprise him. And what if... wait, why was he even stressing about this in the first place!? “Why are you even asking me this?” Such a random topic interrupting your peaceful silence staring at the water.

Again, you lift your shoulders in a shrug. “I'm curious. Here, I'll tell you mine.” You pause to flash a breathtaking grin up at him. “Put your hand up,” Joon doesn't even hesitate to lift his palm, heart stuttering when you're pressing yours against his. As if you're comparing sizes and he can't help but curl his fingers down into the space that's left.

“See that? What you just did? Drives me crazy. And also...” Hand dropping from his to lay flat on his chest and on reflex his muscle is tensing, pecs jumping underneath your touch. It's actually so sexy you contemplate dropping to your knees right then and there. You suppress the urge, but don't make any moves to lifting your hand. “Big hands? And muscles. Phew. Throw in a pair of cute dimples and it's over,”

It's obvious at this point that you're literally referring to him, not intentionally of course. He just happened to check every last one of those boxes. “Why's that?” He's staring at you with these eyes that you've never seen before. Dark and filled with want.

You liked it.

“Makes me feel cute and small, I guess. Like if you... or any guy, but let's just say you, were to use your big hands to pick me up and hold me there while we-” His eyes go wide when he catches on to the end of your sentence, rushing out a frantic, 'Oh okay, I get it!'. Watch as you bursting into a fit of giggles.

He ignores you, taking to peering around the bridge, checking for anyone within earshot that might've heard what you were about to say. Only to find that you two were the only people out here. Unless he was worried about judgmental glares from the birds, you were fine.

“So...” He's starting only after he's done his full scenery check. “You like feeling small, then? That's interesting,” Forever impossible to read, no idea what he meant by interesting, but as always you were running with it.

Steering this night, which had been an amazing date, in a direction that was a little less PG. Brow arched and a smirk playing on your lips, you move into his space. Hand sliding down the front of his body, meeting his waist. Holding a soft grip on the fabric of his sweater, you rise onto your toes, nose just inches from his.

“And? What do you plan to do with this information?” Could swear a small gasp falls from his lips, feeling your free hand tug on the long drawstring of his pants.

There are a million and one thoughts running through his mind right now. Every last one of them revolving around you. How good you look underneath that skirt, how good you smell standing this close to him. The way he could see the faint freckles on your cheeks, faded from your makeup. Yet, through all of his mangled thoughts, there's one that stands out amongst all of them.

You're so beautiful.

And not in the ways that you'd think. Yes, your face fit the standard, and the confidence you carried yourself with was more than deserved, but there was more. Beautiful underneath all of that and he could see it and even with this new stiffness tenting at the front of his jeans, it's all he can focus on.

Soft giggles fill his ears, coming from you realizing the way he was staring at you. Not saying a single word, just looking. “You're stalling. What's yours?” Taking a step back, you allow him a chance to breathe. Just barely noticing the twitch of his arm, ready to pull you close to him again.

“Okay, fine.” Joon's saying with a roll of his eyes, not the annoyed one that you've grown used to. It's playful, cute paired with the smile on his lips. “I like...” Large hand reaches out, landing firmly on your hip, effectively catching you off guard but he doesn't even give you a second to react before he's twisting your back toward him.

A shiver dancing down your spine as the tips of his fingers gently trace the link in the middle of your back. Actually having to bite down on your lip to keep from any noises slipping out in response to his light touch. “That. It looks sexy,”

Now you know how he feels when you tease him. Breathless and flustered all because he touched your back!? Come on, it was about time you got your shit together. Turning in his grasp, your features morph feigning confusion. “You like backs?”

“No! Not just backs. I Mean the dip... and if there's dimples back there. That's always a plus,” He says with a shrug, but you know exactly what he's doing. It was your game, basically invented it.

But judging from the flutter in your chest, he was better at it. “I have dimples back there,” It sounds dumb to your ears, like 'duh, he knows that stupid.. that's why he said it,' but you can't think of anything else to say. Thoughts clouded with how good being touched by him felt and coming up with ways to get more of that.

And he's moving as if he's read your mind, arm wrapping around your waist. Pulling your body to him with this newfound boldness that has a shocked gasp falling from your lips. “I know you do,” His voice is so deep and so sexy, only loud enough for the two of you to hear. You could spend hours just listening to him talk, no doubt. God, you needed to get it together.

“Oh, yeah? You've been sneaking peaks?”

He nods. Like, doesn't even bother to try and hide behind some half-assed explanation why he might've noticed, just owns it. He's so hot. “I'm very observant,” His words have you wondering what else he's noticed about you. How much time did he spend just 'observing', as he liked to call it.

You could figure that out later, there were much more pressing matters at hand right now. Kissing him. Through with the back and forth, you needed to feel his lips against yours. The fragmented memory of the first and only time was quickly fading, you needed something fresh.

With your fingers tangled in the hair at the nape of his neck, you lean into him. Chin tilted up and eyes slowly falling closed, you're just inches from his mouth when that deep voice of his is breaking through. “Are you gonna kiss me?”

“Wow, you are observant,” Breathing out a laugh, you're nodding eyes lifting to find his. He even looked good from this close. “Wait.” His quick movements startle you, a not so cute squeal filling the night air as he bends to lift you, effortlessly wrapping your legs around his waist.

You're both laughing, like side aching chuckles. And you're certain you've never seen him like this before. Eyes forming crescent moons as loud snickers fall from his grinning lips. He's pretty. You're so dazed by that simple fact that you don't notice the way his laughter has died down into soft breaths.

Not until silence is falling over both of you and he's leaning up to press his lips against yours. Large hand lifting to tangle in your hair as he kisses you.

MAY 10TH, 2020 | 23:29

And he doesn't stop kissing you. Not on the train home where you sit on his lap and he swallows every last one of your whines. Not on the walk to your place where he keeps his arm around your shoulder, occasionally leaning down to press kisses against your cheeks. Even stood at your doorstep, you're still like teenagers who just discovered making out.

“Do you want to come up?” You're murmuring against his lips, sentences barely coherent through the push of your lips.

He's registering your words a few moments after you've said them, pulling back to reveal the worried expression on his features. Doesn't say anything, though. Like he's stuck between taking you up on your offer and whatever concern is plaguing his mind.

And then it's hitting you. “Hoseok's out with some girl. Just in case you're worried about that,” You don't miss the way his face relaxes, a sigh of relief leaving his lips. Pulling a blase expression, moving into your space again. “Why would I be worried about that?”

Eyes rolling, you let out a laugh. “Oh, my mistake.” You mock, turning to unlock your front door. Joon is following steps behind you into the house, no sign of Hoseok in sight. Not like he'd really care, on Namjoon's part. Just give you an ear full about how your actions would affect the company.

So, you're glad he's out. In no mood to hear any of that tonight. “Do you want a glass of wine?” Namjoon is following you into the kitchen, nodding along to your words.

He just can't seem to take his eyes off you. Followed your movements from the pantry to the cabinets all the way to the island where you poured alcohol into glasses for the two of you. Watched the way your lips tickled the neck of the bottle, sucking up the droplets that had spilled, dark eyes finding his the moment you're pulling back.

Daring him. To do something. Anything. Joon knew he needed to be bold. Impulsive. Throw caution to the wind and deal with the consequences later. It's how you got what you wanted all the time and right now, he wanted you.

Before he can talk himself out of it, he's rounding the island. Closing the space between the two of you. Hand cupping the side of your face as he wraps an arm around your waist. His gaze flickers from your eyes to your lips, rhythmically. “I don't want wine,” Your heart hammers in your chest.

“What do you want?” You ask, although, you already know the answer.

He takes to showing you rather than telling you, using the grip he holds around your waist to lift your body onto the counter. Stepping into the space between your legs before he's covering your mouth with his.

This kiss is much different from the others, no longer testing the waters. There's determination behind each movement of his lips. Both hands gripping your waist, pulling your body forward until his hips are pressed to yours. His tongue slips past his soft lips to graze your bottom lip. And you're opening up for him without a moment of hesitation, fingers tangling in his messy locks, and pulling – a low groan emerging from the back of his throat.

He's pushing his body flush against yours, hips lifting rightly and you feel the twitch of his cock through his sweats. Sweet moans fall from your lips with every roll of his hips, deliberately pushing down desperate to feel more of him. Your senses are filled with him. The taste of his tongue, the sweet smell of his cologne, how good it feels to have him pressed up against you.

Strong hands roam around your body, gripping the fabric of your skirt tight enough to have it inching up the smooth skin of your thighs. Gently cupping the back of your neck to hold your head steady as he licks into your mouth. He can't seem to make up his mind, greedily wanting to touch all of you at once.

You're meeting everyone of his upward thrusts with a downward roll of your hips, moans growing louder between the two of you with each brush of your most sensitive parts. And you want more. Legs wrapping around his waist to pull him closer, you needed more.

“Fuck, princess.” He's gasping out, not leaving a moment to spare for you to marvel at the pet name that fell from his lips so easily. His mouth makes steady work on your neck, suck red blotches into your skin as the palm of his hand moves down the front of your body. Sneaking underneath the hem of your skirt, your body jolts when he's pressing the tips of his fingers to your slit through the soft fabric of your panties.

Pretty moans fill the room as he teases you, fingers tight in his hair. Heady becoming heavy for your shoulders as the pleasure he's ensuing washes over you. “Namjoon,” You're gasping, hips bucking up when he's pressing his fingers against your sensitive clit. Above the cotton, but each stroke has electricity cruising through your veins.

He chuckles as your whines become more insistent, hips following the movement of his fingers. “That feel good?” Head bobbing frantically, your legs spread wider for him. So sure, you're soaked all the way through from the way he's palming roughly at your panties. He's confirming your thoughts with a groan and a breathy, “You're so fucking wet,”

“Please, Joon. More.” Panting as your hips lift up toward him. He's grinning wide, pressing a soft kiss to the skin of your neck before he's nudging your panties out of the way. “So greedy,” He teases, at the same time his fingers find your clit. He's pressing lazy circles into the sensitive nub, taking his time despite the needy roll of your hips. “Tell me what you want,” Dark eyes travel up the length of your body to your face, you don't even bother to mask the moan that slips at the sight.

An experimental finger teases your entrance, sneaking in past the first knuckle before quickly pulling out and repeating the same action. If it wasn't for the solid stiffness pressed against your thigh, you'd guess that he was torturing you for the hell of it. But judging from the steady rut of his hips, he was enjoying this just as much as you were.

You couldn't wait any longer, though. This moment has plagued your thoughts since the first time you were meeting him. What it would be like to be with him like this. Have him fuck you. You'd surely die if it wasn't now. “Fuck me,” The words come out more whiny than you originally intended but, hey. “Please, Namjoon.”

“Soon, princess.” He promises, sinking his middle finger into your tightness. Eyes flickering between your bodies so he can watch the way the single-digit disappears within your walls. So fascinated with the movement of his own fingers and egged on with your pretty moans, he's quickly pushing another finger in.

Namjoon's mouth finds yours, swallowing every last one of your hushed moans as he fucks into you. Scissoring you open with his long fingers, free hand tugging at the bottom of your top until it's around your waist, tits spilling out. He's groaning against your lips as his palm cups you from underneath, thumb lifting to brush against your nipple.

His head is lowering until he's able to latch his lips around the hardening bud. His sharp teeth graze over it slightly, gentle tongue washing over the slight pinch of his bites. You're whimpering at the feeling of his thumb pressing into your clit, back falling against the cool countertop as your hips move in tandem with his fingers.

It's not long before he's nudging a third finger past your walls, lips moving to mouth on the other side. Thumb moving expertly over your clit while his fingers provide such a delicious stretch, you're squirming beneath him. Searching for something to grip onto as the pressure begins to build in the pit of your stomach.

You take to tugging his hair, pushing his face against your chest as your back arches off of the counter. Wanton moans filling the room, you're being so loud but you can't find the strength to quiet down. Not while he's making you feel this good. And then all at once, he's pushing in deeper, fingers curling and brushing against that rough patch of skin hidden deep inside of you.

“Oh, fuck! Don't stop, don't stop.” You're chanting over and over, hips rocking into his palm and Joon has no plans of stopping. Not when you sound like that, each whine and whimper shooting straight to his cock. He feels the way your walls flutter around his fingers and he's quickly lifting his head to watch your face.

There's a sheen layer of sweat on your forehead. Eyes rolled back as your lashes flutter, lips slightly pursed. Jaw falling slack, a breathless gasp slipping at the same time he feels a gush of wetness surrounding his fingers. Incoherent mumbles of thanks fall from your lips as your body shakes. He keeps his fingers buried inside of you, thrusting slowly until your words are dying down to soft breaths.

Opting to give you the time you may need to regain your composure... which only lasts a few seconds before you're sitting up. Arms and legs pulling him toward you. “Fuck, that was so good.” You say through a laugh, mouth finding his in a sloppy kiss as you work to pull his sweatshirt from his body.

Joon follows your lead, working on tugging his sweats out of the way. Your soft hand meets his, gently pushing it out of the way and dipping into the front of his boxers. Palm closing around his thick shaft and your eyes are going wide, fingers not being able to meet around the base.

“Holy, fuck...” Your hand drags over his length, more so measuring him than anything. Excitement igniting in your chest the longer it takes for your hand to meet the tip. Which is leaking with precum at this point, you feel it when your palm finally covers the tip and then use it to make moving your hand back down easier.

His hips follow the movement of your hand, attempting to fuck into the opening your palm created. Spaced out as the pleasure slowly clouds his mind. He looked so good. Chest and stomach flexing as he moves, shining underneath the dull kitchen lights. Brows furrowed and jaw clenched, making dimples appear at the sides of his mouth.

Your free hand slides down the front of his body until the tips of your fingers are brushing against his balls. Massaging them underneath the slight pressure while your wrist twists over his cock. “Yn, baby. Wait... fuck,” His hips are stuttering to a stop, hand reaching down to still the movement of your palm.

“I won't last,” A soft pink dusts his cheeks as he looks up at you, eyes glossed over and barely focused. He's letting out a breathless laugh before he's leaning forward to press a soft kiss to your lips. “I wanna fuck you first,”

The admission is waking up something entirely different inside you. Something you can't easily place and are in no mood to decipher. Instead, you grin, returning the kiss to his lips before grinning. “Fuck me, please.”

That's all he needs to hear before he's taking a step back from you, not giving you a moment to feel his absence before he's sliding you from the counter. Hands on your hips to turn your back to him, his large hand resting on the middle of your back. “Bend over,” Voice deep in your ear, you'd very much walk off the edge of a cliff if he was asking you like that.

You bend forward without any protest, the cool granite pressing against your exposed nipples. Joon holds a hand just above your ass, the other wrapped around the base of his cock – guiding himself toward your aching core. His thick head nudges against your tight hole and you both gasp as you swallow him in.

He takes his time, allowing you to feel every inch as he slips in. And you don't miss the way his thumb has moved to rest in the indent just above the swell of your ass. Pulling your body toward him with his grip. His huffed breath tickling your back the moment he's bottoming out.

Palms formed fists beside you, concentrating on your breathing as you get used to the feeling of being stretched this way. Slowly, he's pulling out until the head is catching at your entrance then he's pushing his way back in, your body sliding up on the counter with the movement. The stuttered movement of his hips slowly shifts into a steady rhythm that has a string of moans falling from your lips.

Strong, bruising thrusts into your backside paired with the gruff groans that escape his throat. He's so deep, the tip of his cock nudging against your g-spot with each thrusts forward. “Fuck, look how perfectly you take my cock, baby.” He groans, eyes glued to the way your lips are wrapped around him.

All you can muster back in response is a weak whine, a garbled cry of big he was... or how good he feels. Mind nothing but mush at this point, the overwhelming pleasure from the way he was fucking, softening your brain. Either way, he takes the incoherent noises as a compliment, speeding up the snap of his hips.

You all about lose it when he's reaching down to grip your hair, lifting your body onto his, keeping a steady movement of his hips as he reaches around you to find your clit. Rolling it between his knuckles until he's feeling that familiar squeeze around his shaft. Soaking up every whimper and every cry as he brings you closer and closer to release.

“You gonna cum again for me, baby?” Gasping out, your head bobs up and down, back arching in hopes to steal more than what he was willing to give you. “Please, make me cum.” He can feel the way your walls flutter around him, the whine in your voice. And since he's inclined to give you whatever you want, Joon's angling his hips in a way that he knows will make you cum.

And it's not long before the pressure is snapping in the pit of your stomach, loud cries filling the room as your hips lift into a shake. Walls clenched so tight around his cock, it's enough to nudge him over the edge. He fucks into you with great fervor, leaning your body back onto the counter as his hips snap against yours.

Thrusts becoming sloppy and untimed as he feels himself falling apart, an odd mixture of curses and your name falling from his lips as he feels his body tense. He's pulling out as a hurried afterthought, hand acting as a lame substitute for your wet core as he strokes himself to completion. Spilling onto your back with a strained groan.

And then the kitchen goes silent, nothing but the sounds of your heavy breaths and the hum of the fridge filling the room. Neither of you says anything, both trying to come back to your senses. A few moments pass before he's hearing the soft sound of your giggle, body rising off your stomach to turn and face him. He looks so dazed and fucked out, cheeks flushed and eyes blown. Hair a mess and breath ragged. He looked so hot.

A hand finds the back of his neck, fingers tangling into the soft hair there. Joon's grinning when his eyes find yours, an arm wrapping around your waist. Pulling you closer, because it never felt like you were close enough. “We just fucked,” You state the obvious, can't find it in yourself not to.

It was nice. You liked it. You liked him. Everything about him, you just found yourself liking. His laugh. His smile. How easily he was annoyed. The cute dimples. The sound of his voice. You liked him.

“Yeah, we did.” He's replying, a little breathless but he still manages to lean down to capture your lips with his. A short kiss that has you leaning up, silently asking for me. He denies you with a cute shake of his head. “Let's go upstairs. I wanna go down on you,” Okay, bold Joon was something you were definitely going to have to get used to.

He's twirling you around when you don't move to lead him, large hand dropping to tap against your ass cheek, pulling a giggled squeal from your lips. “Ah!” You're laughing when he's reaching to do it again, instead taking hold of his hand. Fingers easily intertwining as you tug him behind you.

His back pressed to yours, cock growing hard against your backside as you lead him up the stairs and into your room. The sound of laughter only growing between the two of you.

Yeah, you liked him a lot.

MAY 10TH, 2020 | 23:58

Your body is warm against his, back pressed to his chest. Soft moans filling the air as he holds you close, pushing into you, chasing yet another release. This time in your bed. With you in his arms and it feels different. It feels nice. It makes him wonder... what's next? If there's something more for him to hope for.

He wanted to be with you, to put it simply. Never would've imagined it'd be you, but now he can't imagine it being anyone else. But things just sometimes worked out that way. Namjoon wanted to be yours, but in turn, he wanted you to be his.

Somehow, he felt like that might be the tricky part of it all.

— daughter of the ceo of the biggest record label, it’s obvious she’d get whatever and whoever she wants. but what happens when she’s meeting the one person that refuses to play into her spoiled brat act?

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