#i’m so unwell about this album i have to listen to it again or i will die | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

evermoreholland · 3 years

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in harmony | tom holland

-> singer!reader x tom holland

-> summary: after a nasty break up, you go to london with your two best friends in hope to find inspiration for your upcoming album and a london boy soon became your muse.

-> word count: 5.7k

-> a/n: wow. this is probably my favorite fic of mine. i hope you all enjoy it as much as i do. big thank you to @rainbowrobin for hyping this fic up and being its biggest fan. also thank you to @cali-holland for beta reading this for me! your support means the world to me and you inspire me every day to keep writing. love you to bits <3

~~~

Breaking up with someone you used to care about was never easy. In fact, grieving and eventually getting over that person was the hardest thing to do. You were a singer so relationships that went public usually ended up terribly wrong. The good part about it is that you can write a hit song about the experience.

Breaking up with your past boyfriend was probably the worst experience for you thus far. You thought that he was the one, every move you made was for him and you ended up depending on him constantly. And he broke your heart. He played you like a fiddle and played with the strings of your heart. He cheated on you with someone you were insecure about the duration of your relationship with him, which made everything feel worse.

You decided that you needed a change of scenery in hopes to clear your head. You had been spending time in your Los Angeles apartment moping around, trying to get over your ex-boyfriend. You also had a deadline for your new album and you haven’t even started. Your album was due towards the end of the summer, and it was now spring.

You sat down on your sofa with a pen and notebook in your hand. You were determined to write something. You didn’t want to write songs about your breakup, but that was all you were thinking about. You saw your phone on the coffee table light up and buzz. It was your manager and agent, Cassandra. You picked up the phone nervously, knowing that she was going to ask about your progress or lack thereof.

“Hello?” You answered.

“Hello, Y/N,” Cassandra greeted sweetly. “How’s the album coming along? We need to start recording soon.”

“Funny you ask.” You always tried to make fun out of an uncomfortable situation.

“Y/N.”

“I’m sorry, Cass! I have no idea what I should be writing about for this album.” It’s not like you didn’t want to write. You did, but you had no idea what to write about.

“Maybe you need a change of scenery, dear. You haven’t been out in months,” Cassandra suggested.

“Maybe you’re right.”

“Where would you want to go? You can stay there for the rest of the spring and the beginning of the summer.”

You thought about it for a moment. You definitely wanted to leave the country. “How does London sound, Cass?”

“Sounds nice. I’ll book you, Natalie, and Sarah tickets for this weekend and I’ll rent the three of you an Airbnb for your stay,” Cassandra confirmed. Natalie was your personal assistant and your best friend. Sarah was your older sister who traveled with you everywhere and she helped you with many of your songs. She was good to bounce ideas off of. You had the perfect team.

“Perfect. Thank you.” You both said your goodbyes and hung up.

***

Tom got off the airplane and sighed in relief. He was finally home. After many months of filming on another continent, he was back in London. Tom was ready to finally sleep in his own bed and hang out with his brothers and friends once again.

Harry and Tom took an Uber back to Tom’s apartment. It was fairly late and all Tom wanted to do was sleep. In the Uber, Tom and Harry made light conversation.

“You want to go to the new pub by our flat this weekend? Haz and Tuwaine want to hang out,” Harry asked.

“Sure,” Tom mumbled. To be quite honest, Tom had absolutely no desire to go out at all this weekend, but he knew that his mates wanted to see him. He did want to see them too, so he agreed.

“Sounds good.”

***

You packed your suitcases for London at the last minute. In your defense, Cassandra only booked Thursday night’s tickets on Wednesday, so you didn’t have that much time in the first place. You were planning on using your time in London to relax and to create a healthy headspace to write your next album.

You called Natalie to ask her opinion on some of your outfit choices. “Nat, am I going for a casual look this trip? Like sweatpants and t-shirts?”

“Absolutely not, Y/N. Are you insane?!”

“It was just a question, Natalie.” You defended yourself. “What should I pack then?”

“I don’t know, just look hot. You need to get out of the post-breakup sweatpants phase.”

“Fine,” you grumbled. You grabbed some cute spring sundresses from your closet and threw them into your suitcase. You packed some jeans and blouses as well.

You hung up with Natalie and took a look at your bag. “Should be good.”

***

The flight to London from Los Angeles was long and exhausting. You arrived at Heathrow airport in the early afternoon on Friday. You immediately went to the house to rest up from jetlag. Once you woke up a few hours later, Sarah was pressuring you and Natalie to get dressed. “We’re going to the pub! Get up, ladies!”

“What? Why?” Natalie groaned. You and Natalie were laying on your beds in your shared room. Sarah jumped onto your bed and tackled you.

“Sarah, we’re exhausted,” you said. You pushed your sister off of you and sat up. “We can just go tomorrow.”

“It’s the pub’s grand opening! It’s supposed to be fire!”

“Fine,” you mumbled. You got up and began unpacking your suitcase. “But I refuse to wear heels.”

***

Harrison made his way to his best mate’s flat to pick him up for the Cheer Beers grand opening on Friday night. Harrison used his spare key to get into Tom’s place. “Tom,” Harrison called out. He made his way to Tom’s bedroom to make sure he was ready for the night.

“In my room!” Tom exclaimed. Tom sounded upset and agitated. Harrison entered his room anyway because he wanted to hang out with his best friend. He opened the door and noticed Tom laying his bed under the covers.

“Are you alright, mate?” Harrison asked. Harrison noticed Tom in his pajamas while in bed. “Why aren’t you ready to go? Harry already went out with Tuwaine to wait in line.”

“I want to hang out with you all, but I’m just so jetlagged, mate.”

Harrison took his phone out of his back pocket to check the time and noticed an Instagram notification from you. He opened it out of curiosity and it was a direct message. It said that you would be at Cheer Beers tonight with your friends and asked if he was going. Harrison and you had met at an award show a few months back and you became friends. “You know what I just found out, Tom?”

“What?”

“Y/N L/N is going to the grand opening tonight.”

“You’re lying just to get me out of bed!” Tom accused him. Tom didn’t want to admit it, but he fancied you. He has been following you on social media and listening to your music for a while now, so Harrison saying you were going to be at the pub caught his attention.

“I’m not.” Harrison showed Tom his phone with your direct message. “I had no idea she was in town, though.”

“No clue, either.”

“Now will you come?” Harrison asked. “I know you have a huge crush on her.”

Tom eyed him skeptically but then let out a sigh. “Fine, I’ll go.”

***

You waited in line outside of Cheer Beers with Sarah and Natalie. You were wearing a black sleeveless cocktail dress with black slip-on vans. You saw a few familiar faces approach you and you realized that it’s your friend Harrison and his mates. You recognized one of his friends to be Tom Holland.

“Hey, Haz!” You greeted. He pulled you into a hug and squeezed you tightly. You pulled away and said, “Following me, I see?”

“Very funny,” he replied. “We were coming to opening night anyway. We were planning this in honor of Tom’s return from filming.”

“Oh, that’s right,” you said and then turned to Tom. You put your hand out for him to shake. “I’m Y/N.”

He shook your hand and you felt his sweaty palm touch yours. You could assume that he was either unwell or nervous. “Tom. Nice to finally meet you.”

“Likewise.”

You introduced Natalie and Sarah to Harrison and he introduced the rest of his friends to the three of you.

“Would you like to share a table with us?” Harry, Tom’s younger brother, asked you.

“I’m sure that Y/N L/N would have much better opportunities than to sit with us, Harry,” Tom interjected.

“Actually, Tom, we would love to.” You all entered the pub and grabbed a table in the back room. Harrison sat between Sarah and Tuwaine. Harry sat by Natalie. You sat between Natalie and Tom, per Natalie’s whisper in your ear to go for it. You all got your first round of drinks.

“So what brings you to London?” Tom asked.

“Needed to clear my head,” you said and then ate the olives from your martini.

“So you flew halfway across the world?” Tom was amused and you could tell. He wasn’t trying to laugh at you particularly, he just thought it was funny that you chose London of all places.

“Shut up,” you teased. “We’re here for the summer. A vacation, or holiday, if you will.”

“Nice, nice.” You could feel the slight awkward tension between the two of you. You were basically strangers so it made sense. You decided to try and break it. “How was filming for the third Spider-Man film?”

Tom’s eyes lit up at your sudden interest in his work. “Can I tell you a funny story?”

***

Three hours passed by and you decided to call it a night. You talked with Tom the entire night. You enjoyed his company but you were also jetlagged. “Tom, I’m tired,” you said as you leaned on his shoulder.

“Me too.”

“Want to walk me home?” You asked.

“Would love to.” You both got up from the booth and Tom paid for your drinks, even though you protested. Harrison, Tuwaine, Harry, Sarah, and Natalie didn’t look like they were ready to leave any time soon so you said your goodbyes to them and left with Tom.

“How far are you away from here?” Tom asked you.

“About a ten minute walk.” You began walking in the cool London air.

“So, Harrison told me that you were writing for your new album. How’s that going?”

“Not well,” you said as you crossed your arms over your chest. “It’s been fucking difficult.”

“I’m sorry, love.” The pet named warmed your heart and body even more. Tom wrapped his arm around your shoulder and pulled you closer to him. “I wish I can help you out somehow.”

“It’s alright. Getting out tonight helped me get into a good headspace,” you said.

“Glad to hear it.” You arrived at your Airbnb and Tom walked you to the front door. “I had a great time tonight, Y/N.”

You smiled, the first genuine smile that you’ve had in a while. “Me too, Tom.” You opened your door to enter.

“Wait.” Tom stopped you. “Let me get your number.”

“Sure.”

***

Two weeks had passed since you arrived in London and you and Tom have been texting back and forth. He had even taken you on a tour of London. He took you to all of the hot spots. Occasionally, Tom, Harrison, and Harry would come over to your Airbnb to hang out with you, Sarah, and Natalie. You were developing friendships with everyone, but you felt a bit stronger about Tom. He was charming, kind, and really funny. You enjoyed his company and you finally got the chance to start writing for your upcoming album. You realized that you didn’t want to write about your breakup with your ex, but instead write about your crush on the brown-haired London boy.

“How is the album coming along?” Cassandra asked you on the phone.

“Pretty good. I have a killer single coming your way and many other songs too.”

“Remember, we need to start recording at the end of July.”

“You got it.”

“You sound happy,” she commented. She was right. You were happy and finally completely over your ex. “It’s a good look on you.”

“Thanks.”

“What are you writing about?”

“Oh, you know… London, pubs, boys,” you trailed off.

***

Harrison was busy planning his upcoming date with your sister, Sarah. They hit it off extremely well at the opening of Cheer Beers. They got each other’s numbers and planned to go on a date. To be honest, Harrison was stressed out. He scored a date with Sarah L/N, which ultimately shocked him. So, he decided to go to his best mate for some advice.

Tom was sitting in his living room and Harrison entered with two dress shirts in hand. One of them was a white button-down and the other one navy. “Which shirt should I wear on my date with Sarah?”

“Black slacks, right?” Tom asked.

“Yeah, and a black leather jacket.”

“Go with white,” Tom suggested.

“Thanks, mate. Another question,” Harrison proposed. It felt natural for Harrison to ask Tom about his lady troubles, even though Tom had been single for a while.

Tom nodded his head to urge Harrison to continue.

“What if I fuck this up?” He asked nervously. “I really like Sarah.”

Tom got up from the couch to come closer to Harrison and put his hand on his shoulder. “You’ll be fine, mate. Just be yourself. She’ll fancy you, I promise.”

“How are you so good at giving me advice but you can’t get a girlfriend?”

Tom mocked being bothered. “Rude,” he scoffed.

“What are you waiting for?”

“If I say the perfect girl, will you slap me?” Tom joked.

“Yes, yes I will,” Harrison laughed as he replied. “I think that you already found the perfect girl at Cheer Beers.”

“We’re still getting to know each other. Why must we move so fast?” Tom wondered. He wanted to take things slow. His life had always moved fast and he wanted something to move at his pace, for once. Too many relationships have moved too fast and he ended up hurt.

“Because she’s only here for so long and I have a feeling that she likes you,” Harrison reasoned. Tom was starting to feel the same way about you too.

“Fine. While you go on your date with Sarah tonight, I’ll see if Y/N wants to hang out.” He picked up his phone from the coffee table and texted you asking if you wanted to come over. You replied saying yes and he smiled. “We’re hanging out.”

“Great. Don’t forget to use protection,” Harrison said as he ran away to go get dressed for his date.

“Fuck off, you div!”

***

Tom went to the grocery store to pick up some snacks and beers before you came over to his flat. He tidied up the living room once he got home and made sure to fluff the pillow to make them look nicer. Even though you and Tom were only friends, he couldn’t help but make sure that everything looked perfect for you.

You arrived 30 minutes later. You wore sweatpants and a sweatshirt, along with your slides. Your hair was out of your face and Tom thought that you looked stunning. “Hey.”

“Hi,” Tom blushed. “Nice sweatshirt.” Your sweatshirt was light blue and it had butterflies on it. Tom realized that he loved that color on you.

He led you to the couch and he sat beside you. “So what did you do today?” You asked.

“I worked on a script that I’m writing and then I helped Harrison get ready for his date with your sister. What about you, love?” The pet name made your heart flutter. Tom was definitely charming.

“I worked on some songs for the album,” you answered proudly.

“Care to share?”

“Willing to share what the script’s about?” You asked back, already knowing the answer.

“I’m legally not allowed to share, so no. I’m sorry, darling.”

“Then my answer is the same.”

“Well played, pretty girl,” he flirted. “Wanna watch a movie?”

“Sure, what do you have in mind?”

“Avengers: Age of Ultron?”

“Yes, it’s one of my favorite Marvel movies!” You exclaimed. “I have a feeling that you knew that already.”

Tom smiled at you as he picked up the remote from the coffee table and turned on the television. “I may have, but only because Haz told me. Don’t worry, though. It’s one of my favorites too.”

Tom found the movie and before he hit play he got up from the couch. “May I offer you some popcorn before we start the movie? I have beer as well.”

“Yes to both, please.” Tom went to the kitchen to pop the popcorn and grab some beers. He came back around five minutes later with everything.

“Here you go,” he said as he handed you a bottle of beer. “I know it’s not a martini.”

“It’ll have to do,” you teased. You pat the seat beside you to urge Tom over. “Now, come sit.”

Tom pressed play and the Marvel introduction appeared on the screen. You moved closer to Tom and he wrapped his arm around your shoulder, just like he did that night at the pub. “Is this ok?” He asked.

“It’s perfect.”

Around an hour into the movie, the popcorn was finished along with your first bottle of beer. Tom’s hand was still resting on your shoulder but now your head was resting on his. “Y/N?” Tom called out.

“Yeah?” You asked as you moved your head away from him so you could look at him.

“Can I be honest with you about something?” You nodded so he would continue. “I really want to kiss you.”

“Can I be honest with you?” You asked while smiling.

“Yeah.”

“I really want you to kiss me,” you said as you leaned in. He pressed his lips against yours in a soft first kiss. You kissed back almost immediately. After a couple of seconds, you pulled away from him.

“Wow,” he said.

“Ditto,” you said and then pulled him back towards you. You kissed him again and you knew that from now on, you couldn’t get enough of him.

***

Tom and you didn’t finish the movie the other night. After your many makeout sessions with him, you decided to go home, and you promised him that the two of you would get together again soon. You went home with the biggest smile on your face. Since your kiss, you and Tom have not talked about the status of your relationship. As of right now, you were just friends who have kissed before. No biggie.

It was now the 28th of May and you were sitting on a park bench having coffee with Harrison. It would be Tom’s 25th birthday in four days and the two of you were attempting to plan the perfect party for him.

“You’ll get the decorations, Sam will cook a few dishes, and I’ll provide booze,” Harrison said, listing things off. “We’ll host it at my new flat and I already called everyone.”

“Sounds great, Haz. I just hope he has a great time.”

“I’m sure he will,” he said as he winked at you, indicating something.

“What is that supposed to mean?” You asked, referring to his wink.

“I know that something happened between the two of you last week. Tom hasn’t stopped smiling since the two of you started hanging out. I’m sure he’ll be happy to know that you planned a party for him.”

“We all are planning it,” you corrected him.

“Yeah, but it’s not like he fancies me,” Harrison laughed.

You rolled your eyes at the blonde-haired boy in front of you. “Whatever.” You got up from the park bench and began walking towards his car. “Come on, Harrison. We need to go to the market.”

***

It was the 1st of June; Tom’s birthday. You woke up early to make sure that everything was ready to go for the party tonight. Harrison and Tom’s brothers planned a golf trip with Tom while you set up Harrison’s flat. You brought Sarah and Natalie along with you to help.

“Move that banner a little more to the right,” you told Sarah. She moved it as you requested. The banner said, Happy 25th birthday, Tom! in light blue glitter. “Looks great. Thanks, sis.”

You blew up balloons, set up tables for the food and drinks, got streamers and ribbons, and finally assembled the cupcake tower with the cupcakes you and Natalie baked the night before.

“Red velvet. Nice choice,” Sarah said as she took a look at the cupcakes on display.

“They’re Tom’s favorite,” you pointed out.

“Seems like you know a lot about him.”

“Well, he is my friend.”

Natalie laughed at your response to your sister’s comment. “Is that all he is?” She asked.

“For now.” You pulled out your phone from your pocket to check the time. It was the early afternoon and the party would start in a few hours. “We better get going to get ready. Sam will bring the food and set it up within the hour.”

Before you got into the car, you texted Tom to wish him a happy birthday and he responded with a heart emoji. You smiled to yourself and then got into the car to drive to your Airbnb.

The three of you washed up and got dressed for Tom’s party. You decided on wearing a light blue sundress with daisies on it. You matched it with white wedges and you did your hair to your liking. Once you were all ready you drove to Harrison’s. When you got there, Harrison, Sam, Tuwaine, and a few other friends of Tom’s were already there.

“Harry is bringing Tom in around 15 minutes,” Harrison told you.

“Ok. Everything seems to be going pretty smoothly.”

“We make a pretty great team,” Harrison said in appreciation for all of the work to make Tom’s party happen.

“Tell that to Sarah over there,” you teased him. His date with your sister went well from what she told you, but because of Harrison’s nervousness, they haven’t talked much since. “She’s been dying to hang out with you.”

“Are you just saying that so you can have Tom all to yourself when he gets here?” He tried to joke.

“No,” you said seriously. “Go talk to her, Haz.” You pushed him lightly in her direction to encourage him to go talk to her.

“I see Harry’s car pulling up!” Sam said a few minutes later. “Everyone get ready.”

Harry used Harrison’s spare key to get into his flat and once both of them entered you all yelled, “Surprise!”

“Thanks, guys!” Tom said in shock. Tom made his rounds to greet everyone to say thank you. You waited patiently in the kitchen for the birthday boy. He finally approached you after a few minutes. “Hey, love.”

“Happy birthday,” you said as you pulled him in for a hug. “You look very handsome.”

He pulled away to look at you. “Thank you, but you’re absolutely stunning.”

You leaned in to kiss his cheek and then said, “Thanks, Tom.”

“I should be thanking you,” he said and then grabbed your hands to intertwine your fingers together.

“For what?”

“Harrison told me that you helped him plan all of this, so thank you.”

“It’s my pleasure,” you said genuinely. “You like it?”

“I love it. He looked over to the counter and saw the cupcakes. “Is that a cupcake tower?”

“A red velvet cupcake tower,” you confirmed. “I baked them.”

“You’re a goddess.” He kissed your lips for half a second and then grabbed a cupcake from one of the tiers. He unwrapped the cupcake and then took a bite. He hummed in delight.

“I’m taking that you like them,” you giggled at the man in front of you. He could seriously make anything look cute.

“They’re heaven,” he moaned. Tom dipped his finger in the frosting and swiped your nose with it. You looked at him in shock. “Aw, you look so adorable,” he said.

You laughed at his antics. “Glad you think so, babe.”

Tom’s lit up at the pet name. “Babe? Hmmm.”

“Yeah, babe.” You took some frosting from what was remaining of his cupcake and placed some on his nose to match you. “You look very cute with frosting on your nose, babe.”

Tom grabbed a napkin from the counter and cleaned the frosting off the both of you. “We’re both very cute.”

“Ok, lovebirds,” Sam called out for the two of you. “Let’s get this party started!”

“Before we go out there, I have something to ask you,” Tom said.

“And what may that be?”

“Will you go out on a date with me?” He asked nervously. You felt your heart skip a beat and you could’ve sworn that you felt Tom’s heart beating rapidly from how close you were standing to him.

“I would love to, Tom,” you said and then kissed him to confirm that you really wanted to.

***

The rest of the night went well and Tom enjoyed his time with his friends. You, Sarah, and Natalie crashed at Harrison’s place along with Tom and Harry. The party ended late and the five of you were too tired to drive home, so Harrison offered to let you all stay there.

You woke up early and made your way downstairs to heat the kettle for tea. As you were waiting, you heard footsteps, and soon enough a pair of arms wrapped around you. “Good morning, beautiful,” Tom said and then kissed your clothed shoulder.

“Morning.” You turned around so you could face him. “How did you sleep?”

“Not so well,” Tom said as he stretched out his arms. “Harrison’s a kicker.”

“Poor baby,” you teased, and then Tom pouted. “Quit pouting, Tommy. I know you’re faking it.”

“Fine,” Tom mumbled.

You turned to the stove and saw that the kettle was ready. “Want tea?”

“Please. A splash of milk and a spoonful of sugar, if you don’t mind.”

“Not at all,” you said as you poured him a cup. “So where are we going on our first date?”

“That’s a surprise, darling.”

***

A week after Tom’s birthday, Tom texted you asking if you were available to go on your first date. You had been working on the album the entire morning so you thought it’d be nice to go out with Tom. You replied yes and he told you to be ready within the hour. Tom knocked on your door around an hour later, with a bouquet in his hand. “These are for you, love,” he said with a smile as he handed them to you.

“Thank you, Tom,” you said and then sniffed the flowers. “Come in while I put these in some water.” Tom entered your Airbnb and you searched for a vase in one of the cabinets. Once you found one, you filled it up with water and put the flowers in. “We should be good to go now.”

Tom held your hand as he led you to the car. He opened the door for you and then got in and started the car. “You ready?”

“Where are we going?” You asked.

“You’ll see in around 15 minutes, angel.” Tom grabbed your hand that was resting in your lap and brought it up to his lips to kiss it. “I don’t think I told you this, but you look ethereal.”

“You’re quite the charmer, Holland.”

“I aim to please,” he joked. “But in all seriousness, you always look gorgeous.”

Tom was by far the kindest man you have ever met in your entire life. You have known him for barely two months but he made you feel like the most beautiful woman in the world. You had never felt this way about anyone before.

Tom drove down to a lake. “It’s one of my secret spots,” he told you.

He led you down to the grass near the water and he set up a picnic there for the two of you. “I made sandwiches, cut up some fruit, and some apple cider.”

“It looks good. Thank you, Tom.” He pulled everything out from the picnic basket and handed you one of the sandwiches.

“Anything for you.”

“So this is one of your secret spots, huh?” You asked.

“Mhm,” he mumbled as he took a bite from his sandwich.

“So you bring a lot of girls here?” You teased and you could’ve sworn that you saw Tom almost choke on his sandwich. “Is that why it's so special?”

“Very funny, love,” Tom said. “No, I actually come here alone.”

“I’m guessing because it’s quiet.”

“Yeah, I come here when I need to clear my head.”

You looked around the area and you immediately understood why Tom liked it so much. There was a beautiful, cool breeze and the birds chirping sounded like music to your ears. “It’s beautiful. Thank you for bringing me here.”

“I can drive you here to write songs if you’d like,” Tom offered.

“That would be lovely.”

You and Tom spent a couple of hours at the lake. You talked about anything and everything, and you finally felt yourself get closer to him. You felt him opening up to you too, which you felt good about.

“Would you like to go on a drive with me?” Tom asked once you both packed up the remainder of the picnic.

“Will there be music involved?”

“What would be a nice evening drive without music? C’mon, let’s go.” Tom led you to his car and you began your drive. The sun was setting and it was beautiful. “It’s wonderful outside, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, it is,” you said.

“I had a great time with you, Y/N.”

“Me too.”

*** Once Tom dropped you off, you began writing another song. His date left you inspired and you were starting to like him more and more. Each time you saw him your feelings for him grew. He inspired you to write your song, London Boy.

Tom wanted a second date. He felt so good leaving the first one and knew that he wanted to pursue a relationship with you. He knew that it would be hard but relationships won’t always be easy. He decided to call you the next to ask when he could see you again.

“Tom, we just went out,” you teased.

“I know, Y/N, but I like you. A lot.” You thought that it was cute how Tom was eager for a second date. You were excited too.

“I like you, too. I would love to see you again, too,” you said.

“Coffee? I don’t drink it but I know how much you like it,” Tom offered.

“How about tea? Know any good spots for a cup of tea and maybe breakfast?”

“I know just the place. See you soon, Y/N.”

***

Many amazing dates with Tom and a bunch of fun days in London later and you know that you’re ready to start recording your next album. People had their assumptions about you and Tom. Rumors had gone around but Tom and you didn’t address them.

London inspired so much of your album that you decided to record there. The rest of your team flew out and you began recording.

You called Tom asking him to come to the studio. “I’m recording one of my favorite songs today. I would love for you to come if you’re free.” You were recording London Boy today and you wanted Tom to hear it since he hadn’t before. It would also be a good way to officially tell Tom that you’re falling in love with him.

“I would love to come. Send me the address.”

“You got it. See you in 20.”

You sent Tom the address of the studio and he was there within 15 minutes. You greeted him at the front. “Hey, babe.”

He kissed you on the cheek and then asked, “Are you excited for today?”

“Very. I’m excited for you to hear the song,” you said as you led him into the studio. You introduced him to Cassandra and the rest of your team.

“Y/N, get your pretty ass in the booth,” Cassandra said. You walked into the recording booth and put on your headphones. “Let’s do this.”

“Tom, sit up in front,” you said and then he took a seat beside Cassandra. “This one is called London Boy.”

The upbeat music came on and you knew that you were skipping the intro for now so you went in with the first verse.

I love my hometown as much as Motown, I love SoCal And you know I love Springsteen, faded blue jeans, Tennessee whiskey But something happened, I heard him laughing I saw the dimples first and then I heard the accent They say home is where the heart is But that's not where mine lives

You heard Cassandra tell you to stop so they could play it back. You saw Tom smiling at you as you were singing and you took that as a good sign that he was enjoying it.

“Now for the chorus.”

You know I love a London boy I enjoy walking Camden Market in the afternoon He likes my American smile, like a child when our eyes meet Darling, I fancy you Took me back to Highgate, met all of his best mates So I guess all the rumors are true You know I love a London boy Boy, I fancy you (Ooh)

You ended up finishing the recording of the song in an hour. You left the booth for your break and you first greeted Tom. “What did you think of it?”

“I love you, too,” he said. You leaned up to him and kissed him with every fiber of your being.

“That’s good because many of these songs are about you.”

“And I can’t wait to hear them all,” he said and then smiled.

“I can’t believe how I’ve only been here for three months and I already feel this way,” you said honestly. You have never fallen so fast for anyone, but it feels right with Tom. Everything feels right with him.

“Well, believe it because it’s real,” Tom confirmed. “Be mine, Y/N?”

“I thought you’d never ask, lover.”

~~~

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tagging: @tomsbabymomma @canwekissforever-hazzy @pinklxmonade @tomsbrina @storybookholland

#this is scheduled so i hope it shows up in the tags #tom holland x reader #tom holland #tom holland fluff #tom holland oneshot #tom holland x singer!reader #tom holland x you #tom holland fanfic

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seraphdarlimg · 3 years

Text

wish I were (pt4)

harry calls reader drunk to pick him up, later on finding him sat at her piano and playing a little song

masterlist

‘heather’ by conan gray WARNINGS - ANGST, swearing, fluff WORD COUNT - 4,418

_________________________________________________________

Just fine is how I was feeling. I was lucky enough to be able to get started straight away with a new song to work on from a different artist. Practicing new instruments and talking to new clients have been what I've thrown myself into for the past 3 weeks.

Though drowning myself into work has kept me busy and given me excuses to ignore the hundreds of calls and texts from Harry, it felt like months had pass instead of only one. I seem to forget more about them and only remember the look on his face when I turn my back on him and left. Instead of memorizing chords and words, my brain can only comprehend the words we said and the last time I felt his touch or embrace. When I want to remind myself of what he did, the moment on the balcony is the first thing that comes to my mind and I curse myself for it.

I missed him, of course I did. As I sit in front of my laptop with an opened tab on a recording program, I am instead met with another creator's block and thinking about Harry again. Two points of thought that I hate being stuck in at the moment. The empty bags and containers of snacks and my dinner surround me and I'm wrapped in a blanket while a sad playlist is playing on spotify. It was a depressing sight.

But I can only image the state that Harry's in. After everything, I still miss and care about him, wondering if he's excited about the album release tomorrow or if he's hydrated and taking the fact that I've chose to walk out of his life better than I am. It's pathetic really, but it's part of it and I can only hope to learn to live without him through time. If that is something I can even think of doing in the first place.

He hasn't called or text throughout the whole day though. I didn't want it to bother me but it did, even if it was time away that I'm asking for. I glanced at the black screen of my phone, pressing the button to turn it on. 12:23 AM and no notifications.

'i do love you, i'm sorry' one day ago. This is a good sign. This should be a good sign.

I sighed, forcing myself to turn away from my phone and focus on finishing this piece. The instrumentals are there and the rhythm is set, but coming up with lyrics prove to be difficult when I feel physically and emotionally drained.

It was late anyways. I would of been asleep by now to get ready for tomorrow, but it was most likely made clear I wouldn't be celebrating with the gang. I told Jeff the excuse that I had a meeting up north for the valid reason, even though everyone already knows what happened between the two best friends. A lunch with Sara and Mitch a week ago started off normal and pleasant as always, but had ended with Mitch bringing up Harry and me leaving abruptly.

"He's a mess. Hasn't left his house and has been ignoring everyone all week. We don't know what really happened between you two, but it's obvious that you haven't been the same as well."

The mention was enough to irk me. "Can we not right now?"

"Look even though we care about you, it's still non of our business to get involved. But it's still our jobs to see that when someone we care about is bothered by something, we make sure they are aware of it. Both of you aren't happy and should simply talk about it."

"It's not that simple Sara, he's too stubborn."

"It doesn't have to be now, but eventually. You yourself know that what you two have is way too special to just walk away from."

"Yeah well what if it's not? What if it's just not what everyone expects it to be? That even if we somehow make it work throughout everything, he's just going to run off to someone else again who'll just be better in so many ways."

"He's not the type of person to do that and you know it."

"I thought I did."

With my head rested on my hand, I feel my eyes droop. The instrumental of the song played on repeat on the program as I try to come up with words. Heartbreak and insecurities are the only topics that come to mind with the upbeat sound. I close my eyes for bit, letting the first stage of sleep take it's toll while my brain works overtime producing lines of rhymes.

But my ringtone drives me out of it. I only force my eyes open when I pick up my phone and answer the call, not thinking of who could be the only possible human being to call me at this hour. I sighed, pausing the recording and saving it. "Hello?"

"Hiiiii love! Karl told me I should call someone because I've had too much apparently. Can you please tell him that I'm a grown man that can handle my alcohol?" Shit.

"Harry- wait hold on, you're drunk now? Don't you have... who are you with?" My voice was tired and already raspy. It took longer than needed to process what was actually happening.

"Oh just all by my lonesome self at first... imagined you here a few times but I know that wasn't true, but Karl the bartender is here now!" His voice was muffled and almost drowned out by the sound of a pub. His words were slurred and I can only rub my temples at the situation he's already put me in.

"Why did you call me for this."

"Well my phone's dead and you're the number I memorized." He said softly after hearing my tone. I shouldn't, but he's drunk and alone.

"I'll call Mitch-"

"Only want you. Please?" I can imagine him pouting and I was too tired to argue with him.

"I can't do this right now..."

"Bubs, my head is starting to hurt and everyone is not being nice. Except Karl, Karl is a nice dude."

Maybe if I wasn't overworked and sleep deprived at the moment, I would of been in the righter state of mind. But the other half of me that worried about his state took the opportunity to see him once again.

"Where are you, Harry?"

***

It was easy to find a drunk Harry Styles at a pub. A small local one that we've been too once or twice in the past, enjoying each other's company over a glass after studio hours. And there he was again, sat at the stools we'd sit on and wallowing to Karl the bartender.

"Hey." I placed a hand on his shoulder after making my way through the small crowd that gathered around him that's been listening into his conversation. His eyes light up when he turns around and sees me, while I take in how disheveled he looks. His curls are messy and his bloodshot baggy eyes tells me he's been crying for a while.

"You're here." He mutters softly after he takes a moment to register that it's actually me. I only give him a small nod in confirmation, feeling that heart ache as he pulls me into a hug. "I'm sorry." I hear when he nuzzles into my neck, most likely apologizing when he sees how tired and unwell i am as he does.

"It's okay, come on let's get you home." I managed to let out, pulling away, guiding him out of his seat and away from the bar. "Oh okay, bye Karl! Keep the change." I send the bartender a grateful smile to which he returns with a pity look on his face.

"Just hold my hand Harry okay?" I tell him when I remember how clingy he gets when intoxicated. He doesn't hesitate to do so as we make our way through the crowd and out of the building.

I managed to get him in the passenger's seat without much interaction, now in the driver's seat and cursing at myself when I realized I didn't have enough gas to take him to his house. I didn't have the energy to go to the gas station this late.

"Are you crying..." He asks, pouting when I placed my face in my hands, taking deep breaths. "Please don't be sad, love." I shook my head, counting in my head as I felt Harry lean over and watch me.

"How many did you have?" I asked when I built up the will not to cry and turned on the ignition.

"Didn't bother counting, didn't matter." I kept my eyes in front of me as I drove while I felt his still on me.

"I would beg to differ. Shouldn't be my responsibility anyways." I quickly countered, noting the sharp tone in my voice and the frown I could imagine on his face.

"I'm sorry...I really wanted to see you."

"Hmm, and getting wasted and being an inconvenience is the way to get my attention." There was a second of silence and I glanced at him to check if he was still conscious, only to see that frown and his head hung in shame. My eyes trailed to the pearl necklace tucked into his sweater, as well as a yellow ribbon tied where it clasps together.

The grip I had on the wheel loosened but I sighed as I hated how guilty I felt after, aware how difficult it was to be mad when he was hurt. "That was harsh..."

"Nooo, I deserve it. I really do because I was mean to you and I don't ever want to be mean to you. Because it hurts me too ya know? More than it did when you walked away...I'm sorry that I hurt you."

I didn't say anything after that, spending the rest of the car ride back to my place in silence.

***

"You don't have to be rich, to be my giiirl. You don't have to be cool to rule my wooorld..."

My annoyance conflicted with the flutters my heart was feeling as Harry was softly singing all the way from my car to my sofa, hand held and clinging to my side the whole time. He plopped down, immediately taking a pillow. "Ain't no particular sign, I'm more compatible wiiith- hey you have that record right? Can you put it on pretty please?"

"It's 2AM, I'm not putting on a record right now." I took off my shoes and coat, graciously doing the same for him when he pouts and rests his head back on the couch. "Aw, you used to not care about that before. Is it because of your neighbors terrible taste of music to blast so late at night?"

"What?" I rubbed my eyes, standing up and going to the kitchen. I couldn't hear his mumbled response, but I returned with a glass of water to see him humming with his eyes closed. He cuddled the pillow close to him and I rolled my eyes, almost laughing at how he was tapping his foot along with the song he was playing in his head.

"Here..." He holds his hand out expectantly and I gave it to him. He takes a drink while I place his coat over the coffee table and go to get him an extra pillow and blanket.

"Oh everything hurts." He whines as I place the pillow down on the end of the couch. "My heart mostly, but that's so cheesy of me isn't it? Yours probably hurts more m' sorry...wish I could take it away."

It wasn't just his naïve words that had my eyes start welling up with tears, but it was also the realization of how he can easily break me down. I couldn't last a whole month without being there when he needs someone, when I was the one who wanted to leave. It was also probably the realization that I had grabbed the same blanket we used to set that little picnic in the studio.

"Wish I didn't cause it in the first place." He added, which led to me sitting down on the chair next to the couch, holding onto the blanket a little longer as delirium was starting to set in.

"I don't think we should have this conversation now, Harry... this is so unfair." I mumbled, rubbing my eyes.

"It is, but I'm scared I won't get another chance." My silence gave him the answer he was already aware of.

"What exactly do you want another chance of Harry, enlighten me." I closed my eyes for a minute, only to open them to see Harry looking at me in a different way. It's different, but I've noticed it before.

"Loving you." He's hesitant with his next words, most likely having sobered up a little. "I hadn't seen Heather for a few days after you left, told her later on about what happened. Took your advice though, talked to her and everything. It just wouldn't work out in the end...couldn't see myself with her in the future."

"But now you do with me?" I softly muttered, holding myself back from reaching out to him. He only nods, having that guilty look on his face because he's fully aware he doesn't deserve it. My droopy eyes are glued to his and that damn pearl necklace, too many thoughts in my head to come up with one whole response.

"Should of just called Mitch. You're an idiot for giving yourself a hangover on your release day." I finally said after a moment of silence.

"Hmm? Oh that, no that's not happening." He says casually, playing with the embroidery on the pillow he was hugging.

"What do you mean?"

"I've postponed the album thingy indefinitely or something."

"Aren't you finished with it?"

"I mean it's got 12 songs and everything but I don't know if it's really finished, I don't know." He shrugs and I'm almost annoyed by how calm nonchalant he is about it.

"You never know things Harry."

"And I hate it, I knooow! I don't know why I can't just figure it out and I hate that I'm hurting you because of it." He frowns, rubbing his eyes. "But I do know now that I love you. Really love you. Maybe if I figured that out sooner, you wouldn't hate me bubs."

I fiddle with my fingers, given up on trying to collect all my thoughts together a long time ago as I can only allow myself to take in his words and listen. He was right, in any other situation where I wasn't tired and delirious, I probably wouldn't even be in the same room as him. So here I was again, allowing myself to hurt in order to make sure he's taken care of.

Maybe it's what I deserve though. He left Heather because of me. I caved into myself at the though that I ruined the relationship of two people who loved each other simply because I didn't get the memo. She is everything in his eyes, he's proven that, so why didn't I just leave them be?

"Ugh, you probably hate me calling you that now but you know I won't stop cause you are my bubs! Like how I'm you're H. Oh... well, you stopped calling me that so...maybe not anymore but I want to be. Can I be your H again please, I miss that too." My thoughts were cut off when he continued, finding him now lying down with his eyes closed.

"Maybe one day." I reassured him hesitantly. We would of stayed friends, we wouldn't of had to fall apart, if I had just left him alone.

"Was a weird nickname anyways, just a letter." He mumbles as I stood up, laying the blanket over him while he still holds onto the pillow.

"You sort of gave it to yourself though, get some sleep Harry." I managed to get out, facing away from him to hide the tear that fell. He should be trying to fix his relationship with her and not me.

"Yeah, but you just started calling me it and I fell in love with it." I take one more look at him before I shut my door, seeing his face nuzzled into the pillow and the glint of a small smile on his face as he drifts off to sleep.

***

8:23. I slept around 2 and woke up 7 hours later to faint piano keys. I took in the soft melody, not recognizing it but enjoying it for a second before I forced myself to sit up and rub my eyes, realizing how dry my skin was from crying. It was definitely a sad song made up of only four chords and a fitting way to start the day as I remember the person who is most likely playing it.

I didn't want to face him, my head feeling too mushed to deal with anything else other than work. It was a weird situation to realize, the man I fell in love with and broke my heart is playing piano after I took him in when he was drunk. He tells me he officially breaks up with Heather after realizing he loves me.

He loves me?

No he doesn't. He should still love her, should be trying to get back to her now that I'm out of the picture. But he hasn't been trying too for the past month, focused on me this whole time. But why?

I snapped myself out of those thoughts quickly, knowing how terrible the following ones would be. I didn't want to think about it anymore, wanting to forget and move on. And as I quietly open my door and peaked out onto my apartment, I see his mess of curls sat on my keyboard with the blanket wrapped around him. He was considerate enough to lower the volume at least.

I took a deep breath and walked out quietly, leaning against the door frame as I continue to listen. "Part of the album, has some of your lyrics in it." He says when he notices my presence.

"Hmm. You told me that you've postponed it." I crossed my arms as he finishes the song with a long note. I see him nod, now looking down at his hands on his lap before adjusting the blanket to fully encase him.

"Yeah I did. It didn't feel right, putting something out there that I should be proud of, but you not being there to be happy with. You not wanting too in there first place, when you put your heart and soul into it, all because of me."

I frown, looking away from him when his intense eyes met mine. "It's too early Harry..."

"You told me it wasn't a good time last night too, so when is?" He huffs and I roll my eyes.

"I don't know after I have my fucking coffee?" I scoffed, uncrossing my arms and heading towards the kitchen. I hear him sigh, not saying anything else as I prepare a cup for myself, already annoyed and stressed out. I felt him staring at me while I avoided making eye contact, rubbing my temples.

"I'm sorry if I was trouble." He says, still sat down on the keyboard with the blanket wrapped around him.

"You're sorry for a lot of things." I sighed, pouring coffee into my cup.

"I am. But I don't know how to really apologize to you when you won't even let me talk to you."

I placed my cup down, suddenly forgetting about my coffee and finally looked at him. "Well what do you expect Harry? After everything you think I'm just going to trust you again? I told you I was done, I wanted to walk out of your life."

"But you picked me up. You still care, that still has to means something." He's frustrated now, desperate even and it only frustrates me more.

"Ah yes, decent morality to not leave an A list celebrity drunk in room full of strangers. That really dumb of you to do by the way, without any bodygaurds- what were you thinking?" I said, noticing how he was fiddling with the pearls that hung around his neck.

"The past month has been hell for me and all I wanted to do was see you. I feel so fucking guilty and sad and it's eating me up because I know I don't deserve any sort of reassurance from you. But at the same time, I so badly just want you back and I'm sorry for how selfish and arrogant I am." He was crying and I soften a little because of it. He tries holding it in, looking down as he quickly wipes away the tears that fall. I don't bother hiding mine anymore, having gotten used to it by now and I was tired of it.

"I've been in pain since December. Four months that you put me through so can blame me when I just want it to stop? I am so exhausted because no matter how much I throw myself into work, all I can think about is you and loving you."

"But I love you too, shouldn't that be enough to try again?" It should of been and he knows. Maybe if he realized it sooner, during his birthday, things would be different.

"You've proven that it's not." I say disappointingly, willing myself to walk over and sat down next to him, looking ahead at my piano in front of me. "I don't know what to do anymore Harry. Why can't you let me have this? Let me move on."

"Cause you and I both know we can't leave each other, too emotionally attached. I need you in my life bubs, everything sucks when you're not in it." I laugh a little at that, because it was true in a fucked up way.

"That's so unfair, why did you have to hurt me?" I hesitantly lay my head on his shoulder before he droops the other end of the blanket around me.

"I know most of my relationships don't last. Deep down I've always loved you but I couldn't let myself fall for you because I didn't want to ruin us. The thought of us breaking up and never seeing each other again just terrified me because I never wanted to lose you, ever. But I fucked up and managed to do so anyways, and I hate myself every day as much as you do." He starts playing the song again as he speaks, but it plays it down a key and slower.

"I don't hate you, can't bring myself too, but you shouldn't of been afraid to talk to me. You know who I am, we would of worked through it no matter what." He nods, followed by only the sounds of the piano melody.

"I'm in love with you." I hear him say softly after a little while out of the blue. It catches me off guard, finding it so foreign to hear those words come from him.

I let out a soft self deprecating chuckle. "No you don't. You care about me, but you don't love me. Probably saying this out of guilt or spur of the moment type thing and I can understand that, but you love Heather. She's good for you, perfect even."

"But I fell in love with you. She's not you." His brows are furrowed together as he frowns.

"Yeah, I'm not her." The small glint of my smile quickly fades and he notices it.

"What I did during my speech was very shitty. Gemma pointed it out to me right away and it's one of the biggest things I ever regret doing." He stops playing when he sees me deep in thought, slowly taking my hand to test the waters. "But I need you to understand what I said was true, that you are such an important person to me. You are beautiful, and kind, patience, and just so fucking good to me, love. I want to cherish you because it's what you deserve and I will deal with as much rejection for you to forgive me and give me another chance. It's worth every heartbreak if it means I get to love you again."

I find myself in an intimate situation, looking into his eyes at such a close proximity, our faces only inches away from each other. I was pleading to him with my eyes, begging him not to hurt me again while the look on his face was one I used to be familiar with. He was frozen while the fear that it would only just happen again held me back from moving. His eyes fluttered down to my lips, as if asking for permission and my head was refusing it. But every other part of me wanted to feel those lips again. I looked down at his, my hand taking hold of his and placing it on my chest to where my heart is before he made the move to finally press our lips together in a small kiss.

I wanted to sob because it felt right. I felt the butterflies again and the complete state of satisfaction. This time was gentle as well, but Harry put so much love into the kiss, cupping my cheek with his other hand when he feels how fast my heart was beating.

It only took a second more before I slowly pulled away, still tightly holding his hand against my heart as he could sense my doubt. "It's going to take some time okay? Probably a long time but you caused me a lot of heartbreak. But I never stopped loving you H, as much as I didn't want too anymore." I said seriously, and his eyes lits up with hope. Holding back his smile as much as he could while he nods because he heard that little nickname again.

"I'll give you as much time and space as you need, thank you. I love you so much bubs." He pulls me into a hug, nuzzling his face into my neck and I feel instantly calmer because of it. I rest my head on his shoulder while he mumbles sweet words into my skin.

"Promise I'll be good to you."

______________________________________________

A/N: :o it’s complete. I finished it yay! I’m so proud with how this series came out and I genuinely hope you guys do as well. I’ve started my semester and it’s going to be hectic so writing will take longer to come out, but there will be future stories that I’m really looking forward to writing and sharing :)

taglist: @big-galaxy-chaos

#Harry Styles #harry styles angst #harry styles imagine #harry styles x reader #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles one shot #harry styles fluff #one direction #harry styles blurb #heather #wish i were

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dreamescapeswriting · 4 years

Text

BTS Reaction || He Wasn’t Your Bias [Request]

Seokjin:

Jin was standing in the changing room, his top unbuttoned as he ranted on about how he was the best-looking member, half-joking and half meaning everything he was saying.

"Clearly I am the best because Y/n chose me as her bias." He yelled you looked up from your phone to see everyone staring at you, you looked at Jin and he nodded for you to admit it,

"You aren't my bias...Well, you are now, but you weren't." You admitted, getting up from the sofa and taking a strawberry for the tub that Taehyung was holding in his hands.

"Who was?" Jin questioned, the rant went from his mind and now all he cared about who was your favourite, you stared at him with a strawberry hanging out of your mouth.

"Why? It's not like it matters now, I'm in love with you." You giggled trying to get off the subject, but Jin wasn't going to drop it. He wanted to know who had captured your heart before he stole it from them.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love you too but who was it?" You laughed at him and shook your head, you were going to have fun torturing him with this.

"Who was it?" Taehyung asked from beside you, you bent down and whispered who your bias was in his ear smirking and winking at him to keep it quiet.

"Looks like someone else was Mr Worldwide Handsome in the group!" He yelled getting up from the sofa and running to tell Jimin who your bias was.

"Tell me." Jin pouted as if he was the youngest, Jungkook stared at you and then smirked.

"ME?! It was me?!" You nodded and Jin stared at Jungkook, looking him up and down and then back to you.

"Him?!" He yelled staring back at Jungkook making everyone in the room burst into laughter, Jungkook came running over and wrapped his arm around your shoulder.

"Looks like you have some competition," You slipped out from under his arm and kissed Jin on the lips,

"No, he doesn't, he owns my heart now." You kissed him once more and Jin smirked, pulling away and ranting about being Mr Worldwide Handsome again.

Yoongi:

"Tae, I'm telling you, Yoongi wasn't my bias." You giggled as you sat in the living room of the dorms. You'd come round to wait for Yoongi and he was in his home studio working on something, Tae and you were having a long conversation about all the bands you listened to and he was trying to find out who your main bias was. Assuming it was Yoongi and teasing you about how you were living the fanfiction life,

"Then who?" You tapped your nose and he groaned, neither of you noticed that Yoongi had been standing in the doorway listening to you both. Now he was intrigued by who your bias was and why he wasn't your ultimate bias.

(X)

"So who is it?" He asked later that night when you were alone, you were snuggled up to him in bed watching a movie when he asked you, you frowned and looked up at him from his chest,

"Who's who?" You quizzed pausing the movie so you could talk to him properly, he'd been weird with you all night and now you were finding out why.

"You and Tae, you were talking about ultimate bias', who is it?" You remembered the conversation and started laughing softly at him but then you realised he was really bothered by the fact that he wasn't your bias,

"Okay, so..."

"Is it someone in BTS?" You shook your head and you noticed him relax a little more, he was glad that it wasn't someone he had to worry about you being around a lot and you looked at him.

"It's just a rapper from another band." You told him but he wasn't going to stop until he got a name, he questioned you more and more until you broke,

"Bang Chan from stray kids." You finally admitted and Yoongi stared down at the bed trying to remember who he was,

"The Australian one...The tall Australian one?" You nodded and he grumbled something, folding his arms over his chest.

"It's because he's tall isn't it?" He pouted,

"No, no, no baby, of course not." He relaxed a little and you laid your head on his shoulder.

"It's his accent." You joked running away from the bed so he couldn't grab you and locking yourself in the bathroom.

Hoseok:

This was probably a bad idea, you were all drunk sitting on the floor together. You'd been invited over to the dorms by Hoseok, your boyfriend as 3 months, you'd met all of the boys before. You enjoyed their company but getting drunk and playing Truth or dare with them when you'd only been dating Hoseok 3 months so you barely knew each other yet.

"Y/n! Truth or dare?!" Namjoon asked as the bottled landed on you, you looked at him with a smile.

"Truth." You took a drink from your bottle of beer, assuming it would be an easy question as all the others had been so far,

"Was Hoseok your original Bias?" Your eyes went wide as everyone stared at you and noticed your expression, ''Oh'ing'' as they noticed that you were scared to answer the question.

"Who was it?!" Yoongi asked, he'd previously not been bothered by the game but now he was interested in it. Each of them leaning forward, wanting to know your answer.

"Why?" You asked slowly,

"Because it's truth or dare, who is it?" Hoseok pressured and you giggled shyly, turning a bright red colour as all of them were staring at you in the room.

"It was Jimin, but only because I was a weakling who couldn't handle how amazing Hoseok was." You finished making everyone fake a gag, everyone except for Jimin and Hoseok, Hoseok who was smirking and kissing your cheek and Jimin who was looking rather smug about the fact that he was your original bias.

"Your everyone's first but no ones last." Hoseok joked making everyone else in the room laugh and move onto the next persons go.

Namjoon:

It was a regular thing to hang out with Namjoon since he was your boyfriend after all,

"What are you looking at?" You asked as you walked into your bedroom with two coffees for you and Namjoon. You'd been dating for six months now and it was the first time he was meeting your parents, you'd spent the morning with them and now you were showing your old room.

"Your old artwork." He said as he flipped through the A3 sketchbook that was in his hands, you sat down on the floor with him and handed him the cup of coffee.

"Oh damn, I forgot I had this." You laughed flipping the page over and looking at the drawings of fruit and other things that were around the classroom when you studied art. He turned the page again and was shocked at what he saw, lining the next four pages were hand drawings of Yoongi you bit on your lip as you saw them. You'd completely forgot that you'd used him as a model for your final exam piece,

"Oh, it's nothing." You laughed awkwardly trying to take the book away from him but he kept it in his hands and staring at the drawings of one of his best friends,

"How come I'm not in here?" He joked as he flipped through the pages and you shook your head, trying to leave but he sat you down on his lap.

"Did you like Yoongi before me?" He was laughing through the question but he was serious about it,

"Well, I mean- He was- I mean...He was my bias." You finally said after stumbling over your words, Namjoon started laughing as he stared down at the photos, you couldn't tell if he was upset by it,

"But I have drawings of you." You told him, kissing his cheek and rushing over to your bedroom drawer and searching for the small sketchbook you kept in there, pulling it out and skipping through it.

"See," You showed him the notebook, he took it from your hands and stared at the drawings of him all from different angles, some of him sleeping, smiling, rapping and working in the studio. He had no idea when you'd done these but he fell harder in love with you.

Jimin:

You were out to dinner with Jimin, your boyfriend, and all of the boys having fun talking about what they'd done at the studio and somehow you'd gotten onto the conversation about your bias.

"It's me obviously," Jimin laughed making each of the boys start laughing along with him but you were shaking your head,

"You weren't my bias." You laughed and all eyes were on you, Jimin stopped laughing and stared at you with his mouth hanging open.

"What?! Who was?!" He asked losing interest in the fact that the boys were all laughing along with you, you sipped on your wine and shook your head.

"Tell me." He begged, making you giggle some more as you put the wine glass back on the table, shaking your head at him and trying to go back to a normal conversation but there was no way they were going to drop this until you told him who it was.

"Was he in our group?" He questioned and you nodded, turning to look at Jungkook who then questioned you more,

"Rap line or vocal line?" You shook your head, knowing it would give it away too easily and you didn't want to get embarrassed in front of the boys. You and Jimin had been dating a year and you'd managed to avoid this the whole time you'd been together, you weren't going to ruin it in one night.

"Come on, just tell me." You groaned at him, he took your hand in yours.

"I will never bother you about it again." You stared at him, he had giant puppy eyes on and he was pouting his lip out.

"ItwasNamjoon." You mumbled into the glass of wine and he frowned,

"Who?" Jimin questioned not hearing you because you mumbled too quickly.

"Namjoon?!" Taehyung asked with a laugh, staring at you and then at Namjoon who was blushing.

"Really?" Jimin questioned and you nodded at him,

"Why?" Both him and Namjoon asked at the same time, you glanced between them both and laughed.

"I think it was because of how smart you are, I always loved smart guys." You explained but Jimin was still staring at you with his mouth open,

"Plus he is handsome." You said before you took another gulp of your wine, Jimin just sat back in his chair with his arms folded across his chest.

"But I love you baby." You whispered to him, kissing him on the cheek and then winking at Namjoon to get a laugh out of everyone else at the table.

Taehyung:

Taehyung was at the studio with Hoseok and Jimin, working on some new dances for the new album while you stayed home, you'd been feeling unwell and decided against going so Taehyung was sending you videos of the practising all morning. At the same time, your friend was texting you about the new Selca's that Hoseok, Jimin and Taehyung had posted that morning, resulting in you and her sending one another fangirling messages all morning.

"You look, great baby!" You sent to Tae before your best friend started spamming your phone with photos of the new Selca that Hoseok posted, it was him in the dance mirror, his shirt clinging to his body and sweat dripping down his body, it instantly sent you and your best friend into a fangirling frenzy and you began texting each other fast, not caring about spelling mistakes and you mistakingly not checking who you were sending the messages to.

"Hey Tae, you finished already?" You questioned when you answered the phone but you heard him and Hobi laughing down the other side of the phone,

"He's just so ajkhfiug aklhfiugh...Look at that love heart smile, I'm jealous that Tae is around him right now?" You felt your heart stop and you checked your messages, wanting to scream as you realised you'd been sending the fangirl messages to Taehyung instead of your best friend.

"Oh. My. God." You screamed, laying on the sofa and wanting it to swallow you, all you could hear was Hoseok and Taehyung laughing about it and you knew you were never going to live this down ever again, and it was all they were going to talk about for the next few months.

"You're not going to let this go are you?" You questioned receiving a ''No'' from both boys before the line went dead, leaving you in a state of shock. You screenshot the messages and sent them to your friend,

'If you need me, I'll be crying in my bed.'

Jungkook:

"Give me a hint at least," Jungkook said as he followed you around the apartment, he'd found out last week that he wasn't your bias and he'd been questioning you ever since. He wanted to know who it was and why it wasn't him,

"Why wasn't it me?" You shut the kitchen cupboard after putting the plates away and then turned to look at him, it was the first time all week that he seemed upset about this and you sighed. You couldn't stand upsetting him, you'd been together for a year now and it was the first time you'd discussed things like this,

"Because when I first started listening to you guys, you were a baby just like me...I liked older guys." You told him and he clapped his hands together, screaming that he knew who it was, jumping around the apartment trying to find his phone.

"It's not Jin!" You called out to him and you heard him yell out a swear word making you laugh as he came running back into the kitchen and questioning you some more,

"If I tell you, will you promise to drop it?" You questioned as you leant against the kitchen side and stared at him, he nodded and you rolled your eyes,

"Mark Tuan." You told him watching as he smirked at you turning to look for his phone again and you chased after him,

"What are you doing?" You questioned as he chuckled evilly, reaching his phone and hitting Namjoon's number,

"Do you still talk to Jackson?!" He yelled making you scream out as you chased him through the apartment, knowing for a fact he was going to tell everyone about who your bias was.

"Jeon Jungkook!" You yelled as he locked himself in the bathroom and leaving you banging on the door.

tagline:

@kpopfanfictionhoes @lynnthevirgo @yourguessisasgoodasminemate @snowy-meowl @yoongisdumplingcheeks @btsiguess-kpop @lyoongx @mitzwinchester @callingmyangel @rjsmochii

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spidernerdsblog · 4 years

Text

I Forgot That You Existed : Chapter Five

A/N: Chapter five is here. The pent up tension between our ex-lovers is getting too much for them to handle. As things get heated up they give in to their feelings momentarily. Are they gonna regret it? Or will this reignite their love giving a new dynamic to their relationship? Y/N has been hiding a secret will she reveal it? What implication will its revelation bring in their lives? I hope you like this chapter. Feedbacks and suggestions are always welcome. Let me know what do you think Y/N has been hiding.

Pairing : Tom Holland × Singer reader

Summary : It's been more than five years since you and Tom have gone their own ways after a heartbreaking breakup which had left both of you shattered. Both of you thought that you were finally over with each other and were happy in your respective lives until you meet again at a reunion trip planned by your best friend and you realize you are still not done with each other.

Warnings : fluff, making out.

Mini Playlist : Bad Blood by Taylor Swift, Cheap Thrills by Sia, Break My Heart by Dua Lipa

Tom and El breathing heavily. Tom rolled over to the side placing his hands below his head staring at the ceiling. El scooched into him, placing her hand on his bare chest.

“That was amazing.” El said, letting out a deep breath.

“Hmmm” Tom hummed.

Loud laughter and giggles were heard from your room. As you and Z were literally screaming at the top of your voice singing.

'Cause, baby, now we've got bad blood You know it used to be mad love So take a look what you've done 'Cause, baby, now we've got bad blood, hey! Now we've got problems And I don't think we can solve 'em You made a really deep cut And, baby, now we've got bad blood, hey!

“They are really close aren't they?”

“Yeah they are soul sisters." he chuckled. "Surprisingly Y/N has been with us since childhood but Z seems to know her more than any of us in such a short time.”

“Because we girls understand each other very well mister. There are some things guys will never understand”

“So you are trying to tell me that I don’t understand you”

“I didn’t say that dummy” El laughed lightly slapping on his chest

Tom and El were startled by a loud thud as if someone fell on the floor as they heard you groaning loudly

"Owww!!! My ass!!" you groaned going into fits of laughter. You and Zendaya were pillow fighting as you lost balance and fell.

“You deserve that bitch” Zendaya giggled.

El smiled listening to your banters “Someone is way too excited and happy” she chuckled.

“You know I think they are perfect” looking up to Tom

“Who?”

“Steve and Y/N, they make a perfect couple. She should consider this relationship.”

“I think it's too early to comprehend darling as much as I know her Steve isn’t her type”

“Why not? I mean their personalities complement each other so well; it will in a way benefit both of them professionally too. She is a world class singer and he is such a skilful event manager if they work it out and get married in future you know what I mean.

“Maybe”

Tom turned to his side, his back facing El. He frowned at the thought of seeing you with someone else. But then El's words struck him, he thought what if that guy was trying to befriend you just for his professional gains. He felt he needed to protect you from another heartbreak. He decided in his mind to talk to you about this tomorrow.

You were all having breakfast. Steve had called you saying he will come to pick you at 9. You chose to wear a cute top with your shorts.

“You look cute in that top Y/N” El complimented

“Thanks El”

“Any special reason?” El danced her eyebrows

“Oh nothing” you shrugged.

“I know, Stevey boy is coming to pick her up” Chloe chirped

“Oh shut up” you blushed.

You went to put your plate in the kitchen sink. Tom was already in there. He thought this is the right time to talk to you.

“Umm Y/N I need to talk to you about something”

“Yeah what is it?”

“I think you should keep your distance from that guy. I mean Steve”

“Umm okay I'll give it a thought. But any reason why should I be away?”

“Because I said so.”

“Wait a minute. Are you jealous?” You smirked, raising an eyebrow. Tom scoffed

“Listen Y/N I’m serious. I..I’m just trying to protect you okay”

“I’m not a baby Tom. I can take care of myself but thanks for your concern”

“Look who is here Mr. Johnson” you heard Ed and ran out to meet Steve.

“ Heyyy you.. you look ...pretty” Steve fumbled

“Thanks. You blushed tucking your hair behind your ear. “let's go then”

“Yeah, after you.”

You buckled the extra helmet Steve brought for you and sat down behind him on the bike. He started his bike and pulled the clutch to shift the gear you jolted into him clutching his broad shoulders tightly.

“You did that intentionally didn't you?” narrowing your eyes.

“You weren’t holding on to me tightly darling” Steve gave you a cheesy smile. You rolled your eyes.

You reached the spot in around 20 minutes. Steve led you to the stage.

“Okay so this is your stage rockstar. Whatever you require just tell me I’ll arrange everything”

You slipped your guitar strap around your shoulder as you started rehearsing the chords.

“You know you should start with look what you made me do. That's really a badass song and maybe finish with something soft and romantic. It will be even better if you give a sneak peek of your upcoming album by performing a new song.” Steve suggested

“That’s actually a great idea Steve! Thanks” You continued rehearsing and completely lost track of time. Suddenly you felt a pair of hands around your hips. You smiled. Steve placed his chin on the crook of your neck.

“Hey beautiful! Are you hungry?”

“Yeah a little” you nodded

“Let’s go and grab some lunch then”

“So should I take this as a simple lunch or an official date?” you smirked

“A lunch date maybe” he shrugged with a toothy grin

Back at the house everybody was having lunch.

“Excuse me guys” El ran to the bathroom feeling nauseous and she threw up. Tom ran to her aid. He came out with her carrying her to their room. Everybody was worried.

You were seated at a nearby restaurant. You both were having a good time eating and chatting; your phone dinged the screen flashed Zendaya’s name.

Come back immediately. It’s urgent

“I’m sorry I gotta go something urgent has come up” you got up from your seat apologizing to Steve

“That’s fine love. I’ll drop you” Steve got up too as he took you home.

You reached home around noon. Zendaya had texted you about what had happened. Everyone was sitting in the living room as you entered.

“How is she?” you asked

“She's fine.. taking rest” Sam stated

“So is she pregnant or something?”

“Y/N?!’’ Zendaya elbowed you looking at you with wide eyes.

“What?! I'm serious; the symptoms you told are either indigestion or pregnancy. And please don't tell me that they aren't sexually active because we got the sneak peek yesterday itself."

“This isn't a joke Y/N” Tom said sternly

“I'm not joking Tom I will never joke on such a serious topic because I'm very well aware of the implications it brings to a person's life.”

Zendaya grabbed your hand and shook her head violently, panic in her eyes to stop you from talking further. You understood what she was trying to say and tried to cover up

“And.. anyways you two are getting married it’s nothing to freak out. I would still recommend her to take the test.”

“It's okay Y/N. I had my period plus I’m on pills so nothing to worry. It was actually indigestion. Sea food really does not suit me. But I don't think I will be able to go to the beach carnival with you guys, still feeling a little unwell.” El said as she came down the stairs.

“It's okay babe you take rest I'll stay with you” Tom went up to her as he ran his hand on her back in a soothing way.

“No Tom, you should go, why miss out on the fun for me.”

“It's okay El nothing is more important than you in my life.” Tom held her hands placing light kisses on them.

“I know bubs and your happiness is my first priority, so go and enjoy for my sake.” Tom didn’t extend the conversation any further and agreed to her.

Now you felt nauseous looking at their cliche tooth rotting romance. You blew out your cheeks and turned towards Steve who was standing at your back.

“Okay then see tomorrow” you hugged each other.

“Yeah bye darling” Steve left

Everyone went to their rooms to get ready for the carnival. Tom was dressing up as suddenly your words reverberated in his mind. He couldn't make any sense out of your words. What did you mean by the implication of pregnancy in a person's life and why did Z abruptly shut you up. He felt as if you both were hiding something.

“Seriously Y/N were you out of your mind?! You were just going to spill everything out.” Zendaya lashed out.

“I know I'm sorry. I just don't know what came over me.” you sat on the bed covering your face with your hands.

“I know babe but you gotta be careful. It's a secret you chose to hatch it down in the darkest corner of your heart, can't let it spill unless you want it otherwise ."

You went and hugged her tightly tears rolling down your eyes

"What would I do without you" you sobbed

"You'll always have me by your side darling, okay now cheer up and let's get ready.”

............................

You all came out of the house. Two cars were already parked outside. You immediately ran towards Harrison's car.

“I'm taking the front seat"You opened the door and sat.

Harrison, Zendaya, Harry and Paddy sat on the back seats

“Who's gonna drive?” you asked confused

Then you saw Tom with the car keys as he opened the door and you both momentarily glanced at each other as he sat on the driver's seat.

You divert your attention outside the window as you feel a tension arise between you two.

As Tom drove the car an eerie silence prevailed. It started to get kinda boring so to lighten up the mood you turned on the car's stereo and connected your phone.

Cheap thrill starts playing

(Come on, come on, turn the radio on

It's Friday night and I won't be long Gotta do my hair, put my make up on It's Friday night and I won't be long)

Everyone cheered and started grooving to the music.

('Til I hit the dance floor

Hit the dance floor I got all I need No, I ain't got cash I ain't got cash But I got you, baby)

Turning a little to your side you took out your phone and started recording everyone singing and grooving. Tom occasionally glanced at you.

(Baby, I don't need dollar bills to have fun tonight

(I love cheap thrills) Baby, I don't need dollar bills to have fun tonight (I love cheap thrills) But I don't need no money As long as I can feel the beat I don't need no money As long as I keep dancing)

Unbuckling your seat belt so you got up and kneeled on your seat facing backwards. As you all continued lip syncing loudly and vibing in the car. Tom kept his straight face all the time.

(Come on, come on, turn the radio on

It's Saturday and I won't be long Gotta paint my nails, put my high heels on It's Saturday and I won't be long)

'Til I hit the dance floor Hit the dance floor I got all I need No, I ain't got cash

I ain't got cash But I got you, baby)

A sharp turn came as you all jolted to the right side. You almost lost balance, one hand holding tightly on the head rest of your seat and another grasping on Tom's shoulder. He held your hand tightly to prevent you from losing balance, giving you a stern look. You knew that look very well, he used to give you that look when you were being a brat. You felt a little intimidated and straightened yourself and sat properly again.

(Baby, I don't need dollar bills to have fun tonight

I don't need no money As long as I…….. Song continues

Reaching the carnival you were overcome with nostalgia so many sweet memories you had of this place. Everyone got out of the cars and went in different directions. Out of habit you waited for Tom to park the car and then go inside. When you both entered the carnival ground none of your friends could be seen.

“Guess what our friends ditched us” you pressed your lips together frowning

“I guess so." Tom twisted his lips looking around then turning back to you

"Okay, stay right here I’ll be back in a minute”

“But.. but why? Where are you going now?” you asked confused, tom trailed off in the crowd.

“Huh!” you scowled “am I so bad that he hates to spend a little time with me” you thought. You looked around and thought going into the stalls checking out the stuff. You eventually went when a sparkly pair of earrings caught your eyes. Taking it in your hands you placed them in front of your ears checking in the mirror if they look nice or not.

“I told you to stay right?” you heard Tom say from the back.

“I'm literally near the spot you left me.” You tried to reason.

“Okay here take this.” He handed you a grilled corn. Your face instantly lit up

“Hey thanks.” You cheerfully bite into the corn.

Tom hadn't noticed earlier but now when he saw you carefully your necklace caught his eye it's the same black dahlia necklace he gifted you after filming far from home. A smile crept on his face at the fact that after so many years you had kept it.

You looked up to find him smiling at you “What?” You asked

“Nothing” he shook his head.

It didn't escape Tom's eyes the way you were staring at those sparkly earrings and he instantly knew you wanted them but you were confused if it would be worth buying.

"You like them?"

“Huh? Oh no just looking" you shrugged off

“Oh don't lie to me I know how much of a fetish you have for earrings"

He immediately asked the seller to pack those for you as he took out his wallet to pay.

“You know I can pay for myself” you commented

He grinned "Oh don't worry you can pay me back later by cash or you know by the kindness of your pretty little"

“You finish that line and I’m gonna kick you in your balls Thomas” you were so done with his snarky comments; you were fuming as you stomped away from him.

"Hey Y/N! Wait for me!" You picked up your pace. Tom ran to catch up with you. He stood in front of you blocking your way.

“Here you go" he handed you the small gift bag.

“In no circumstance I'm taking that" crossing your hands and turning your face away annoyed

“Hey, hey listen” he tried to hold your hands stepping closer.

“Don't touch me” you swatted him away

“Okay feisty pants, calm down” he stepped back raising his hand in the air in defeat.

"Oh come on Y/N I was just joking I'm sorry. Here take this. Pleaaase" he pouted.

"Go and give that to El I’m sure she will pay you back nicely like she did last night." You taunted.

"I don’t switch gifts meant for someone else moreover El isn't much of a fan of my gifts she says my taste is like an old man. She would totally figure out I did’t choose these."

“That’s true you are an old man.” corner of your mouth quirked up. Tom stretched his hand to give you the bag you took it lazily.

“Are we cool now?”

“Yeah sort of.” You gave a half shrug.

“Let's do something like old times then shall we?” Tom proposed

“Yeah fine by me anyways our best friends have ditched us so we are stuck with each other.”

You both went to try out different rides in the carnival. You enjoyed the roller coaster the most. After the ride you both sat down on a nearby bench to rest. Meanwhile you were deciding what to do next.

“Wanna have some ice cream?” Tom offered

“Have you ever heard me saying no to ice cream?”you smirked

“Okay wait and don't go anywhere this time.” He disappeared in the crowd. You sat on the bench scrolling through your phone.

“Boo!!” Tom grabbed your shoulders from the back. You were startled, almost dropping your phone .

“God! You scared me” you gasped

He chuckled “here you go darling" he handed you your ice cream. Your heart swelled up by the fact that he still remembered your favorite flavour combo by heart one scoop of chocolate and cookies & cream with lots of extra choco chips.

You both started walking, licking on to your ice creams, your bodies brushed against each other occasionally as you both glanced into the stalls. Tom carefully watched you, the way you licked the ice cream made his mind wander to inappropriate places making him smile internally. You both were passing in front of a gaming stall.

"Wanna win something for your girl?" the owner of the stall threw the question towards Tom.

“Oh no he has a very bad aim” you tried to get away from there as you always thought these games are just a waste of money.

“What! I can aim." Tom retorted widening his eyes.

“No you can't" you argued "And these games are rigged you know that very well Tom" you muttered in his ears.

"What do you want babe?”

“Babe?? " you gave him a puzzled look.

“Just tell me.”

“Okay that big bunny which you always failed to get to me.” You challenged him.

Tom paid the money he had three chances to throw the ring on the small replica of bunny.

“After you lose don’t tell me I didn’t warn you” you quipped

“Yeah, yeah will see that. And if I win, what is my reward?”

“Of course the big bunny that’s what you paid for, idiot” you grinned.

In the first throw he completely missed it.

"See! I told you it was a waste of money" you complained

"Oh! Y/N just let me concentrate" he huffed

The second throw was almost close, you both groaned frustrated. The third throw was a kind of prestige fight for Tom because he knew you were gonna mock him all his life if he loses. You on the other hand were tense crossing your fingers you wished he would win. Tom threw the ring and it went in the exact spot you both cheered, throwing your hands up in the air and hugged each other tightly. Pulling away soon but you felt a slight pull as you noticed the chain of your necklace had tangled with his spider man necklace. Tom struggled to untangle it, you swatted his hand.

"Stop pulling it dumbo, you are going to break the necklace" you grumbled

Tom felt warmth filling his heart seeing you so possessive about the necklace.You stepped closer and slowly tried untying the knot. Both of your breath hitched. After a few seconds you untangled your chains. The seller handed Tom the stuffed bunny.

“Here you go princess” Tom handed it over to you.

“Thanks.” You took it hugging it tightly. You were now more comfortable with each other giggling and laughing in each other's company. Anybody could mistake you both as a lovely couple. Unknowingly you were now holding hands and walking across the carnival.

“Picture for the beautiful couple?" a photographer from a photo studio chirped around from the corner.

“Oh no no we are not..” Tom cut you off

“Yeah sure why not”

“But tom..”

“Come on Y/N it will be fun”

You reluctantly went inside the studio and tried different costumes. You both posed and clicked some silly photos of yourselves.

Finally you caught sight of the rest of your gang, both of you rushed to them still holding hands.

“Hey where were you guys?” you asked

“Hey aah..” Zendaya stopped halfway to look at you, your hand hooked on to Tom’s arm furrowing, her eyes all skeptical.

You both followed her gaze as you realised, you leave each other's hands feeling awkward looking away.

“So what's with the bunny?”

“Oh it's for El Tom won it as a souvenir for her as she couldn't make it.” You lied.

“You guys wanna go on the Ferris wheel? it will be fun to watch the fireworks from up there”

“Nah we are good down here plus we are hungry.”

“Okay then we are going for the Ferris wheel. Will meet you at the parking lot after that.”

You queued up and waited for your turn to buy the tickets. You turned back a little girl caught your attention, she was glancing at you both mostly Tom curiously with her doe eyes. You thought she must have recognised Tom. Tom looked back too. He waved his hand towards her with a smile.

She tugged on her mother’s dress and whispered.

“Mommy, look spider-man” her mother turned her gaze towards you and gave out a light shriek

“Oh my god! Tom Holland and Y/N Y/L/N!! I’m a huge fan of both of you”

You both smiled.

"I'm Claudia nice to meet you"

“Hello.. nice to meet you too” you both greeted the lady

“Where’s MJ? Are you spider-man’s new girlfriend?” the little girl chirped. You and Tom looked at each other chuckling.

“Ssshh!! Don’t tell MJ” you joked. The little girl frowned. You crouched in front of her as you caressed her cheek.

“I'm kidding honey I’m not spider man's new girlfriend I’m his best friend. What’s your name little miss?”

“Vienna”

“That’s a beautiful name Vienna”

“You are so big but you still play with bunnies?” she asked you innocently

Tom stifled a laugh hearing that. You looked at him narrowing your eyes.

“No one is too old for bunnies honey. And this was given to me by someone I love so can’t throw it away can I?" Vienna nodded in approval. You glanced up to Tom.

“Can we take a selfie?” Claudia asked

“Yeah sure why not?” Tom picked up Vienna in his arms as you all cuddled close to take a selfie.

“I heard you are going to perform, is it true?”

“Yes I’m.” You confirmed

“Great!!! Looking forward to attending your concert.”

“I’ll be eager to see you guys in the audience”

"Hey Y/N! come here it's our turn." You heard Tom calling you

"Okay see you guys in the concert bye. Bye Vienna."

Tom had already bought the tickets while you were talking. You got up in your cabin. Sitting close to each other shoulders brushing in the cramped space, it was nothing new though for you two but now the circumstances have changed. The wheel rotated for a couple of times and then it halted as the fireworks were about to begin. Your cabin was at the top so you could get the best view.

“You did this?” you quirked your eyebrow

“Nothing a little extra tip can’t do” he winked. “Wait a minute, it's gonna get better.” He took out his phone and played one of your favorite songs which both of you used to hear.

Perfect starts playing

(I found a love for me Darling, just dive right in And follow my lead Well, I found a girl, beautiful and sweet I never knew you were the someone waiting for me)

“It feels as if we are teenagers again.” You giggled

The fireworks began as you looked up in the sky in awe. Tom was looking at you the whole time. He had missed your heart warming smile all these years and he felt happy that he was the reason behind your smile. You turned to him to find him already gazing at you with his soft brown eyes.

“I really missed this you know” you gave a tight lipped smile.

“You like it?” he asked softly

“I like it?! I love it!!!” You said excitedly

('Cause we were just kids when we fell in love Not knowing what it was I will not give you up this time Darling, just kiss me slow, your heart is all I own And in your eyes, you're holding mine)

Tom's eyes never left you. You cuddled close leaning on his chest to look at the fireworks show his hand around your shoulder. He felt heat rushing to his ears his chest pounding as he leaned his head above yours to look up at the colourful night sky.

(Baby, I'm dancing in the dark with you between my arms Barefoot on the grass, we're listenin' to our favorite song When you said you looked a mess, I whispered underneath my breath But you heard it, darling, you look perfect tonight)

You felt butterflies in your stomach under his gaze so you straightened yourself looking at him timidly. The atmosphere felt heavy as both of you felt a strong magnetic pull luring both of you. Your body was slightly turned towards him. Your hair blowing in the gentle night breeze.

(Well, I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know She shares my dreams, I hope that someday I'll share her home I found a love, to carry more than just my secrets To carry love, to carry children of our own)

He himself turned a little facing you, his hands slipped down to rest on your hips as he drew you in. His warm breath falling on your face. He gently brushed away the hair falling on your face tugging it behind your ear and rested his hand on the side of your face caressing your cheek with his thumb. Both lost in each other's eyes. You gazed into his warm brown eyes which were full of love. His eyes flickered between your eyes and to your slightly parted lips. Your faces were just a few millimetres apart, warmth blossomed in your chest, sparks igniting as Tom leaned in close, lips brushing together.

(We are still kids, but we're so in love Fightin' against all odds I know we'll be alright this time Darling, just hold my hand Be my girl, I'll be your man I see my future in your eyes)

Tom pulled you close, deepening the kiss your lips were soft he could taste the chocolate ice cream you had on your lips. You shivered and let out a soft moan. To your surprise you were kissing him back, you felt his warm mouth on yours and closed your eyes, your hands subconsciously went around his neck tugging on to his soft curls. He groaned into the kiss.

(Baby, I'm dancing in the dark, with you between my arms Barefoot on the grass, listenin' to our favorite song When I saw you in that dress, looking so beautiful I don't deserve this, darling, you look perfect tonight)

A strong passion taking over both of you as you frantically kissed each other. Like the first drops of rain brings relief to a rain deprived parched land you both felt the same way, an euphoric bliss, as if you were thirsty for ages and finally the thirst is being quenched. A million emotions of love, lust, desire surged in your bodies. Neither of you wanted to stop, you just wanted to savour this moment.

(Oh, no, no Mm

Baby, I'm dancing in the dark, with you between my arms Barefoot on the grass, we're listenin' to our favorite song I have faith in what I see Now I know I have met an angel in person And she looks perfect No, I don't deserve this You look perfect tonight)

The world seemed oblivious for both of you. Both were brought back to your senses when the wheel started to move again. You slowly broke the kiss still in a haze. Your foreheads resting against each other as you both were gasping for air. You looked into his eyes, a panic strike both of you, you immediately pulled away trying to avoid each other's gaze as you looked over the illuminated town. Part of your mind felt so good and didn't want it to end but the other part reminded you constantly that whatever happened was so wrong. The cabin descended down your heart still beating at an alarming rate you tried to calm yourself placing a hand on your chest. The cabin squeaked as it halted, Tom bent low to squeeze out through the small door of the cabin. Wordlessly, he helped you step out of it. It was time to go back so you started walking back to the parking lot. Not a word was spoken between you two throughout the whole walk.

“Oh the love birds are finally back.” Harry joked

Your heartbeat quickened at his remark as you gave a death glare to him.

“Okay sorry, sorry my bad.”

“Haz can you sit in the front? I want to sit with Z at the back.” You almost begged.

“Yeah sure no problem love.”

You sat silently. Tom looked at you through the rear view mirror as he started the car.

“What happened? You look all flushed out are you okay? Zendaya asked concerned

“Did you guys fight over there or what?” Harrison asked, rolling his eyes.

“No nothing like that, just tired actually.The rides were really fun.”

So let's continue the fun. Harrison turned on the car stereo and played from his Playlist.

Break My Heart starts playing...

(I've always been the one to say the first goodbye Had to love and lose a hundred million times Had to get it wrong to know just what I like Now I'm fallin')

Everyone started singing. Zendaya nudged you a little, giving you a questioning look, you nodded your head to assure her everything was okay , smiling and joined them.

(You say my name like I have never heard before I'm indecisive but this time I know for sure I hope I'm not the only one that feels it all Are you fallin'?)

You glanced at Tom through the rear view mirror pressing your lips together in a thin line. You had a lot of questions in your mind. You wanted to ask Tom why? Why did you do that? What does this mean to you Tom? Why couldn’t you control yourself from giving into the kiss?

(Center of attention You know you can get whatever you want from me Whenever you want it, baby It's you in my reflection Now I'm afraid of all the things it could do to me If I would've known it, baby)

The air felt suffocating, your throat felt dry as you were sweating. Your mind kept drifting to that heated moment on the Ferris wheel, subconsciously nibbling your lower lip. The whole incident was wrecking your mind.

(I would've stayed at home 'Cause I was doin' better alone But when you said, "Hello" I know that was the end of it all I should've stayed at home 'Cause now there ain't no letting you go Am I falling in love With the one that could break my heart? Oh no, I was doin' better alone But when you said, "Hello" I know that was the end of it all I should've stayed at home 'Cause now there ain't no letting you go Am I falling in love With the one that could break my heart?)

You now seriously regret coming here; you really should have stayed at home you thought. That face, that damn face will be the death of you one day, it makes you go weak on your knees. You can't be falling in for him again when you know that a heart break is inevitable.

(I wonder when you go, if I stay on your mind

Two can play that game, but you win me every time Everyone before you was a waste of time Yeah, you got me)

Tom himself was having a hard time to concentrate on driving his hands all sweaty. You were all on his mind. As he looks at you through the mirror his eyes instantly goes to your plump rosy lips which he was sucking a few moments ago as if his life depends on it. He just wanted to pull you around a corner and feel your soft lips again.

(Center of attention

You know you can get whatever you want from me

Whenever you want it, baby

It's you in my reflection Now I'm afraid of all the things it could do to me)

This time you caught him staring at you a chill ran down your spine. He immediately looked away face turning red; heat crept up your cheeks turning pink.

(If I would've known it, baby

I would've stayed at home 'Cause I was doin' better alone But when you said, "Hello" I know that was the end of it all I should've stayed at home 'Cause now there ain't no letting you go Am I falling in love With the one that could break my heart? Oh no, I was doin' better alone But when you said, "Hello" I know that was the end of it all I should've stayed at home 'Cause now there ain't no letting you go Am I falling in love With the one that could break my heart?)

.......... Song continues

As you reached home you waited for everyone to get out of the car and go inside.

“Here take this.” You handed out the stuffed bunny to Tom

“It's for you love not for El and you know that very well.”

“Hmm” you hummed looking into his eyes, many unsaid words were spoken.

You both went up the stairs. Standing in front of your rooms you glanced at each other for one last time and went inside.

“I thought that was for El.” Zendaya pointed out at the stuffed toy.

“Yeah I'll give it to her tomorrow.”

“Now you are going to lie to me too" Zendaya scoffed

"I know it is for you. Mind telling me what's going on between you two?”

“Nothing, nothing is going on. Wha.. What makes you think that? You stammered

“Nothing, just you have been acting strange through the whole ride back home.” Zendaya frowned; she knew something was up with you two.

“Oh I must be tired that's why I guess.” You let out fake yawn.

The night was going to be long for you and Tom as you were still hot and bothered needing some sort of relief but none of you are going to get it tonight.

.....................................................................

Taglists: to be added send a message or ask I'll be happy to add you in the following chapters.

@sleepybesson @sophs-library @spideyparkerstark @itstaskeen @milli86 @biebsmylife95 @quaksonhehe @hannahholland1811 @awhollandx @joyleenl@itsnotmeh24 @bitchinwpoei @astridcomming

#tom holland #tom holland imagines #tom holland fluff #tom holland smut #tom holland x reader #tom holland x y/n #zendaya #haz osterfield #taylor swift #spiderman

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purplesurveys · 3 years

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1256

surveys by taco-tuesdays

What steps would you take in order to track down a thief? Not too far, honestly. I accept things pretty easily so if I’ve processed that I’ve been robbed, I am most likely to just let it go. I’ll feel like shit, of course, but I would just let it go and scold myself for failing to be attentive.

What is something that one of your family member collects? My mom used to collect printed table napkins from different restaurants, but obivously she hasn’t been able to continue that for the past year and a half. My dad and brother used to collect magazines but both stopped a few years ago.

What would you do if you were able to have lunch with the queen? The journalist in me will probably just ask her questions about her everyday life, how she spends it, what she’s into and what she’s not into these days.

If you got to create a new flavor of ice cream, what would it be? This is a little hard considering there are a lot of small businesses out there already getting creative and quirky with ice cream flavors so it’s just hard to tell if a certain flavor has already been invented or not. One thing I haven’t seen, though, is curry. I’d buy a pint of that in an instant.

What are some questions that you would ask your favorite celebrity? His latest vlog finds. He once shared a video of this smaller content creator, so I’m guessing that’s what he likes doing in his spare time and I’m sure he would have a bunch of other just as interesting recommendations.

If you were able to set up a stand, what would you sell? Street food.

Would you like to go deep sea diving? Why or why not? Yeah. I’m always willing to try daring, not-the-safest-thing-in-the-world activities haha.

What would life be like if you lived on a cloud? The realist in me just wants to say I’d plummet straight to the ground.

What would you find at the top of a magic beanstalk? Idk, my creativity can’t be bothered to be challenged.

What is one food you would not want to have rain down from the sky? Durian. It would hurt and stink like shit.

Which animal's characteristics are similar to your own personality? I don’t really assign sets of personalities to animals.

If you were in a department store, which aisle would you check out first? I personally still go for the toys/video games section first HAHAHA

What are some of your hobbies? They include going to museums, exploring new food and restaurants, traveling to different cities and countries, and reading about history.

You've opened a store that only sells purple items - what do you sell? BTS merch hahahahah duhhhh

What is something important that you've lost, and did you ever find it? I lost a rosary that came straight from the Vatican. No, I never found it again. I feel bad about it not because it’s a religious object, but because it came from my grandma.

Have you ever moved to a new school before? If so, how did it feel? I mean, I had to change schools when I was moving up from high school to college, but I’ve never changed schools within the same chapter of my studies, like in the middle of elementary or high school. But to answer the question, it had been a very liberating and empowering experience. I hated the rules in my Catholic school and there were so many elements from that place that made me hide so much about myself. The fact that I could wear shorts and curse and attend rallies and cut class and make my own class schedules in college felt incredibly freeing and satisfying.

What would've happened if Cinderella never went to the ball? See magic beanstalk question.

If you had one day to do anything at all, what would you choose? I would drive to Tagaytay and find a cozy restaurant and eaaaaatttt awaaaayyyy.

What are a few of your favorite songs? I really really like Singularity by V, Over the Hills by Hayley Williams, and So Far Away by Agust D and Suran.

Have you ever legitimately forgotten to do homework? All the time. I never wrote down homework.

If you were a witch, what kind of a spell would you cast? On who? I don’t care about casting spells on people. I just want my cravings to show up in the snap of a finger hahaha. Can that be part of a witch’s scope of work? Kjdgfhsdfskjfhs

Do you enjoy autumn leaves or spring flowers more? Why? I wouldn’t know. I experience neither over here.

What is your favorite sport to play? What about watch? Table tennis. Favorite to watch would be either tennis or pro wrestling.

Have you ever gone on a cruise before? To where? Yeah. It was an East Asian cruise so I traveled to Shanghai, Jeju, and Fukuoka.

What would you do if you were invisible for a day? Probably go to the bigger houses in the village and see how fancy they get.

Depending on where you live, why might a day of school get canceled? Typhoon, floods. A lot of places are incredibly prone to flooding, so as long as it’s been raining super hard the chances for a class suspension will get high.

What types of transportation do you think we will see in the future? I dunno. It seems like we’re at that point where everything is in the process of being invented or perfected already.

What were some of your toys you always played with when you were little? I liked kitchen sets and anything with lots of buttons, so like toy telephones or cash registers.

If you were a movie star, what would a day in your life be like? I have no clue apart from the fact that I’m just glad I would assumedly have more than enough money to buy whatever I’m craving whenever I want hahaha.

If you invented a time machine, what year would you like to go to, and why? Realistically I wouldn’t change a thing; but if I had to answer this question I’d go back to 2016 and never ask out Gab a second time, so that the next four years wouldn’t end up being such a waste of my time.

What is your favorite holiday and why? I don’t have one. I’m not a big holiday ~celebrator.

What is something that you like to do while on vacation? Try food I’ve never tried before. The more unconventional or obscure, the better.

If you could meet any fictional character from a book, who would it be? Eh, don’t really have anyone in mind.

What are some common places that people tour when they come to your city? There’s the waterfalls in the upper part of the city – I’m just not sure if it’s still a popular spot but it certainly was when I was a kid. There’s also an art museum that I’m certain is a lot more frequented now.

What's one food that you did not enjoy as a child, but do as an adult? Curry.

How would having no electricity affect your daily routine? I wouldn’t be able to attend work, at least not for the whole day. It would also feel a lot warmer without the electric fan, which would in turn make me cranky.

If you had one wish, what would it be? A renovated room with a dedicated corner for all my merch.

Say someone gives you a magic sweater. What happens when you wear it? Idk.

If you built a new city, how would you convince people to move there? I wouldn’t.

What is one of your favorite movies? Why is it one of your favorites? Two for the Road. It has Audrey Hepburn, it’s a realistic rom-com, and the chemistry between the two leads is superb.

If you were given a certain amount of time to live, would you want to know? Yeah for sure, I would want to know in a heartbeat.

What would you do if you were able to stop time? I don’t know what I would do, but that would be a nice...opportunity, I guess? to experiment with or try out certain decisions and see how well or unwell they would work out to be. So that when time resumes, I’d know better on how to best handle a situation.

Do you think that long distance relationships would be for you? I wouldn’t actively go for it, but I’m not shutting down the possibility either.

Is there a popular social media platform that you don't have an account for? I have one for all the main ones, I think. Even Instagram, I made an account not too long ago to finally join the platform.

How old were you when you found out about Santa, the Easter Bunny, etc? I never knew the Easter Bunny was a thing until I started taking these surveys at like 14. I never really believed in Santa either, and the only figure I was super disappointed to learn that it didn’t exist was the tooth fairy.

Who is your favorite Disney Princess? Rapunzel.

Which freaks you out more - clowns or porcelain dolls? Porcelain dolls. They look more innocent, which somehow makes them creepier.

What was the last mistake that you learned from? Hm, just a minor work thing that would be too complicated to explain here.

Do you prefer "regular pencils" or mechanical ones? Why? Regular. I always break off the tips of mechanical pencils.

What is one little-known music artist you'd recommend? Andi made me listen to The Drums recently and I’ve been loving their sound so far; they would be perfect on a road trip. I’ve only listened to one album, though.

What is your favorite Pixar film? Toy Story!

Who was the last person to send you any sort of message on social media? Angela sent me a video meme.

Where were you on September 11th, 2001? I don’t know...probably already being put to bed. Either way I wasn’t fully conscious yet as I had only been 3 and living on the other side of the planet.

Name your favorite green vegetable. Broccoli, spinach, bell peppers, or asparagus. IDK I love veggies hahahaha

Could you handle a friends with benefits type of situation? Not for me. I’m not even into sex.

Do you prefer using a brush or a comb on your hair? Comb.

What's your favorite flavor of potato chips? SALTED EGG. I’m obsessed; I had like five bags this week alone.

Would you rather build a snowman or a snow fort? Why? I dunno; I’ve never tried making either.

At what age do you believe children should begin having screen time? I’m not too sure at this point, but I do know I don’t plan on being too strict with my kids. I’d let them watch stuff on an iPad from like age 3 or 4, but one thing I would change from how I was raised is putting a limit on their screen time, maybe half an hour to an hour a day.

If you had to give a speech, what would it be on? I’d be down for any topic as long as I was given ample time to research, honestly. I like public speaking.

#survey #surveys

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ibelieveinharrystyles · 4 years

Text

Chapter Two: London Calling?

Forever? Masterlist

25th December 2015

“Merry Christmas Anne!” Ashley called out as her and her mum entered the Twist family home, the smell of Anne’s homemade nut roast wafting towards them as they hung the coats up.

“Ashley! Linda! Merry Christmas to you both!” Anne greeted them both with a hug, her familiar scent was sweet, with an added floral touch that Ashley didn’t recognise.

“Is that a new perfume Anne? It smells absolutely delightful.” Ashley asked as she took off her battered converse, she respected Anne too much to wear them in her house.

“Yes my love! Harry bought it for me, we did our stocking presents this morning and we’re just setting the table for dinner.” Anne told her.

“Sounds absolutely perfect!” Linda exclaimed as Anne led them into the kitchen, perfectly decorated as always, Harry stood at the island in the middle of the kitchen chopping a mountain of carrots, “You’ve got him well trained haven’t you?”

“Linda! My favourite Hanson!” Harry cried, placing his knife on the chopping board as he ran towards her, wrapping his arms as he swayed her from side to side.

“Look at you Harry, you’ve grown so much since I last saw you,” Linda said, taking a step back to look at Harry properly.

“Mum you literally saw him six months ago.” Ashley muttered, rolling her eyes at her persistent mother.

“Don’t listen to her Linda, she’s just jealous.” Harry told her, causing Ashley to stick her middle finger up at him, “If it’s alright with you Linda, I’m going to say hello to my second favourite Hanson.” Harry sauntered towards Ashley, “Merry Christmas!” He cried, stretching his arms out, before enveloping her in a hug, the itchy fabric of his over the top Christmas jumper.

“Merry Christmas you little shit,” Ashley whispered, so as not to let her mum or Anne hear.

“Can I get you ladies anything to drink? I’ve got wine, beer, lemonade or just water.” Anne told them as she retrieved a bottle of red wine from the fridge.

“Well as it’s Christmas I’ll have a glass of wine please.” Linda told her.

“Just water for me please, I wasn’t feeling too well last night, I’m not sure alcohol is going to help that.” Ashley said softly, “Are you doing your ginger biscuits Anne?”

“I made some yesterday, why do you ask lovely?”

“I just thought I could smell them, I remember the smell from when Harry and I were little.” Ashley told her.

Dinner was in full swing and Gemma and Robin had now joined the group, to some it might seem unorthodox for Ashley and Linda to spend Christmas with another family but since the Christmas of 2008 when their oven stopped working Anne insisted they came over as they had lots of food spare and since then it had become a bit of a tradition, alternating between houses each year. The room was full of laughter and the warmth from the open fire tickled their skin, the sound of the Michael Buble album filled the room. “So Harry what have you got planned for 2016?” Linda asked, piling carrots onto her plate.

“I’ve got a few things lined up, I’m looking forward to it, I never thought the idea of not having my day planned for me would be so exciting.” Harry told her, fiddling with his paper crown.

“How about you Ashley? I know you’re on a gap year, but have you decided what to do after that?” Robin asked her.

“I’m quite interested in radio, I’ve applied for an internship at Capital in London, Harry gave me their contact details, and when we went down for the boys’ show in London I had an interview, and I’ve been offered a place, starting in the new year.” Ashley told them, the only other person around the table who knew was Linda, she had meant to tell Harry, there just never seemed to be a right time.

“That’s amazing Ash!” Harry exclaimed, “So you’ll be moving to London then?”

“I’ve got the money dad left me in his will, I think this is the sort of thing he’d want me to use it for, to get myself a small flat.” Ashley didn’t like talking about what happened to her dad, she was only ten when he passed away so she didn’t really understand at the time, he was diagnosed with cancer when she was little, and in his last few months it became increasingly worse.

“He’d be so proud of you poppet.” Anne assured her, taking hold of her hand from across the table.

The meal was finished and Anne stood in the kitchen preparing dessert whilst everyone discussed whether to play monopoly or family fortunes first. Ashley felt herself losing concentration in the conversation, she felt her palms become clammy, she began to realise it was a recurrence of what had happened the night before. She excused herself and made her way to the bathroom, making it in time to throw up in the toilet rather than all over Anne’s bathroom floor, she slumped against the wall, knowing it was likely she’d probably throw up again. The tiles on the wall were cold against her warm skin, she stood up, splashing cold water on her skin. “Ash you alright in there?” Gemma asked from the other side of the door, Ashley unlocked the door, letting Gemma in, “You look a bit peaky lovely, are you alright?”

“I think I had something dodgy to eat last night, I was sick last night as well.” Ashley explained.

“Mum told me you could smell ginger.” Gemma replied, sitting on the floor next to Ashley.

“What’s they got to do with anything?” Ashley asked.

“Ash when was your last period?”

“I’m not exactly regular, but i’d say it was almost eight weeks ago. Wait, you don’t think?”

“You might be pregnant.” Gemma whispered, Ashley rested her head in her hands.

“Why is this happening? Why now?” Tears rolled down her cheeks, as far as she was concerned she wasn’t ready to be a mum, she was only just an adult.

“Hey, we don’t know that you’re actually pregnant lovely,” Gemma told her softly as she held her tight, rubbing her back gently, “I might have a test somewhere, do you want to do it now?” Ashley said nothing, she just nodded, “Let's get this over and done with,” she whispered.

Ashley had never known three minutes to take so long to pass, she sat on the toilet biting at her nails, the timer on Gemma’s phone went off, indicating that the three minutes were up. “Do you want me to look at it first?” Gemma asked.

“I think I’ve got to do it, it’s pretty clear I’d be bringing up a baby by myself, for that I should be able to stand on my own two feet.” She wobbled as she stood up, taking the test in her hands. She took a deep breath and looked down at it, she knew what it meant, she turned towards Gemma, “two blue lines. It’s positive.” her voice wobbled terribly as she broke down in tears.

“It’s gonna be alright, we’re going to get through this together, we all love and care about you immensely, whatever you decide, whatever’s best for you.” Gemma assured her, cradling her in her arms, “Do you want me to get Harry or your mum?”

“You can’t tell Harry, not yet, not today, I’ll tell mum soon, just not now.”

“Alright, we’ll go back downstairs when you’re ready.” The two girls were interrupted by a knock on the door.

“Are you okay Ash? Can I come in?” Harry asked from the other side of the door.

Ashley shoved the test in her pocket and wiped the tears from her cheeks, “Yeah come in.”

“I’ll leave you two to it,” Gemma made her way out of the bathroom, “She’s not feeling too well, look after her.” she instructed Harry.

He held out his hands to pull her up from where she was sitting on the floor “I’m going to run you a warm bath with any bubbles of your choice, then we’ll watch a film in my old bedroom, I don’t want to subject you to games night if you’re feeling ill.”

After a wonderfully long soak in the bath Ashley changed into the joggers and hoodie Harry had left out for her, she tied her damp hair up on top of her head and made her way into Harry’s room. He’d created a proper relaxed environment for her, the room was lit by nothing but fairy lights that were strung around the ceiling. “Love Actually or Home Alone?” Harry asked as she climbed into the bed.

“Love Actually, you know how much I love Colin Firth,” she chuckled, snuggling up under the duvet like a little kid.

“Don’t know why I even asked.” Harry replied, putting the DVD in the TV before joining Ashley in the bed, she snuggled into his chest as he wrapped his arm around her, stroking her arm gently.

“I’m sorry I ruined your Christmas Harry,” Ashley whispered.

“Don’t be daft, I love spending time with you, if I’m honest with you I’ve spent so much time in other people’s company over the past five years, I’d much rather be up here with you watching cheesy Christmas movies.”

An hour into the film Harry looked down at Ashley, she was sound asleep, she looked two peaceful, so he didn’t dare disturb her, he knew she was unwell and didn’t want to make her feel worse. He pulled his arms from where he’d been holding her, getting out of bed and pulling the duvet up so she was properly covered. He turned off the TV and all the fairy lights, “Merry Christmas my love.” Harry whispered, placing a kiss on top of her head before making his way back downstairs.

The smell of bacon stirred Ashley from her deep sleep, she peered around at the bedroom that wasn’t hers, realising she was in Harry’s bed. She slipped out of bed, making her way downstairs to the kitchen where Harry and Gemma sat eating breakfast. “Morning,” Ashley chimed as she sat beside Harry at the kitchen table.

“You feeling better?” Gemma asked, prompting Harry to get up and make up another bacon sandwich.

“Yeah, I slept like a baby.” She told her, stretching out before pouring herself a cup of tea, “You didn't say anything did you?”

“It’s not for me to say, you can tell him when you’re ready, but I know my brother, he’ll be by your side every step of the way.”

“What are you two whispering about?” Harry asked, placing the bacon sandwich in front of Ashley.

“You.” Ashley replied, sticking her tongue out at him, “When do you fly out to LA?”

“As soon as he can I reckon.” Gemma winked at her.

“Oh yeah we wouldn’t want to keep Kendall waiting would we?” Ashley teased, Harry crossing his arms across his chest like a grumpy child, “Oh we’re only messing H, if you’re happy that’s all that matters.” Harry continued to keep up the grumpy teenager pretense, “If you don’t give me a smile I will sit on you,” Harry glanced at her suspiciously, “You leave me no choice.” She stood up from her seat and plonked herself on his lap, he uncrossed his arms and wrapped them around her tightly, her head squishing against his bare chest that poked through the gap in his white dressing gown.

“You win.” He told her, “You always will.”

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fymoonbyul · 4 years

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[INTERVIEW] Moonbyul for Arena Homme+ Korea (March Issue)

AH+: Your second solo album will be releasing. How do you feel? MOONBYUL: I'm excited. The things I dreamed of are becoming a reality. There is a part of this album that the general public may take in refreshingly. I feel like they may be surprised like, 'A female idol doing this genre?'

AH+: Along with Moonbyul, I think MAMAMOO has shown what they want to say on the stage. In that aspect, I got the impression of an artist. MOONBYUL: Unless you're solo, it's difficult delivering my words in a group. But, as MAMAMOO, we've been able to consistently show the music we want to do, diversity, and our words. The members opinions are reflected even in [non-title] songs, and we can include each of our lives. I really like that.

AH+: The four members lives are each different. The point of view that you see the world will also be different. I feel like it would be difficult gathering different people's point of views into one voice. MOONBYUL: It's really difficult. We're a group whose opinions converge well, but it was really hard to do at first. In the past, we clashed a lot. Wondering, 'why aren't they listening to me, are my thoughts not that good?'. We fought a lot, too. While MAMAMOO developed, the members became close. Now, we all know who likes what.

AH+: How do you solve things when you clash? MOONBYUL: We speak honestly. If there's a problem, we don't try to avoid it and hit it head on. If you start avoiding things, there's no end to it. Everyone just gets stressed. And the team becomes distant. The reason MAMAMOO's able to last a long time is thanks to us talking a lot.

AH+: Since you can be honest with your members, I think that sincerity is also in your music. MOONBYUL: That's right. That's definitely a part of it.

AH+: I feel like there are words that you couldn't say as MAMAMOO in your solo album. MOONBYUL: There are genres that each of us like. I like performances that female idols don't attempt a lot. I'm able to relieve that deep sorrow of not having been able to Chow it through my solo performance. It's an exciting thing.

AH+: The album name is <Dark Side of the Moon>. What does it mean? MOONBYUL: It means the back side of the moon, and it expresses the other side inside of me. People have kind and bad sides. There's this ambiguity. It has the meaning that I'll protect you from becoming biased to the bad side. Also, I took my name ‘Moonbyul’ to say that I would become a 'star (byul in Korean)' and shine on you when you're afraid of the two sides of the 'Moon'.

AH+: Is this what you call a punchline? MOONBYUL: Haha. It's that kind of vibe.

AH+: You've shown sincere music activities until now. Your solo album theme is also about becoming honest. MOONBYUL: That's right. I wanted to include the meaning to show the other side of yourself, and to learn more about each other. Of my songs, I like ‘ILJIDO' the most. It has a lot of my current feelings in it. It's not something I wrote myself, but it was created with my story. It's about how I couldn't sleep while preparing my solo album, and my worries that continued late into the night. I think it can become an album to show myself a little more.

AH+: Don't you become more depressed the more you observe yourself? MOONBYUL: I become really depressed. I think that's what the 'Dark Side of the Moon' is. The bright side of the moon is flashy and exciting, but the other side is always dark. I think that's the real image of the moon.

AH+: Is there anything you discovered while observing your own abyss? For me, I saw money. Meaning I want to become wealthy. MOONBYUL: Haha. That's a given. There's a reason I want to become wealthy. My home is a large family, living together with my grandparents. I've never had to send away someone close to me, and I never prepared myself for it. I don't think that's something I can do, so I want to make it so my grandmother and grandfather aren't sick. I want to become wealthy and take care of them. I want to pay for all of their hospital bills. And I want to send them on lots of trips. I want to do everything for my family without regrets.

AH+: You can't get ready to let someone go. You live with the feelings afterwards. MOONBYUL: This is my first time talking about this. We had a concert in Seoul. On the final 3rd day, I heard an unwell grandmother was missing. That's when I felt it. That someone close to me could leave. That not everybody could healthily be together forever. I couldn't focus on the concert. I thought I would go crazy. I even thought about what would happen if I couldn't see my grandmother. I just stayed in a corner of our waiting room. At that moment, Solar unnie came and asked what was going on, so I told her. I really don't want to think about that day. That's when my thoughts of wanting to be wealthy became resolute.

AH+: Let's talk about your album again. What do you want fans to feel when they listen to this album? MOONBYUL: I hope they don't think trapped in a frame. What you want to do is the answer, and I hope they don't give up on it. I hope they listen to it thinking that even just attempting something is progress.

AH+: You debuted after going through trainee life, and you've released a solo album like this. You reclaimed your life making a brave choice. But, reckless decisions aren't easy to make for an average person. MOONBYUL: I also boldly changed my dream. When I was younger, I only dreamed of becoming an office worker or teacher, and was extremely timid. I couldn't even stand in front of people. I never imaged I would become a singer and stand on stage. My family probably didn't either. But, as soon as I said I wanted to do this, my parents supported me. I'm still thankful for that. Thanks to them cheering me on then, I think I was able to come this far. If they said no at that time, I wouldn't have tried to become a singer.

AH+: The more I get to know you, the more you seem like a person who is full of love. MOONBYUL: Haha. Am I? My parents always gave me lots of help so I could try what I wanted to. They didn't pressure me with studies either.

AH+: Since you rap, you have the opportunity to work with many artists. Is there an artist you want to collaborate with? MOONBYUL: I want to work with Taeyeon sunbaenim (senior). I've always been such a fan. It's also my wish, and I still cherish that dream.

AH+: How about sending a DM? MOONBYUL: I'm shy. I want to approach her naturally. Normally, if you like [someone], it's hard to approach them. Haha.

trans by ch0sshi

#mamamoo #era:dsotm #t:interview #t:trans #200221

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fmdjoosungarchive · 4 years

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location: mainly daisung’s apartment

date: ~april-sept 2020

word count: 1967

tldr; verification for sung’s song badbye. full everything. the beginning reads so pretentious and dramatic i’m so sorry. sung has a dream about his first best friend (peep the call back to the first loves series) and it sets him on a spiral of self-negativity, thinking he’s bad for everyone he loves and they’re all gonna want to leave him some day. copious mentions of daisuke, who is featuring on the song, mention of yujin, and unnamed references to sung’s friends

“but you could! you could just leave me!” the sound must have been deafening, but all sound muffled. sung barely heard himself. “you can just- just decide you don’t want me anymore! and i- i can’t-” his knees felt weak, sudden as it was, and he collapsed forward, breathing in the heat of daisuke’s body against his own. that warmth was infuriating, but right below that, taking up the majority of space within sung, in every last crevasse, was a deeper pit, hollow and eternally empty. the voice that came out of sung’s mouth was broken apart, near unrecognizable as his own, “please... please don’t leave me.”

static, with his finger pressed down on the rubber tipped button of the remote. the television was older, blocky, thick rimmed. the one from his home in gwangju. he registered, then, that he was in the sitting room of said apartment. but, unlike the home from back then, filled with ambient noise of his mother milling about, starting their dinner hours far ahead of time as she preferred to every day, his father flipping through papers or rattling off to his itty bitty brother about sports, said brother nodding enthusiastically despite only understanding every fifth word, this room was silent, save for the static.

zzt.

blue glow combined from the greyed out screen, must have been covering his face. he could feel blue, as a tangible object, a taste in his mouth, an ink on his eyes, a scent perforating his brain.

sung changed the channel, and there he was. in the same white shirt and grey pants he was in the last time he ever saw him. his first best friend.

he didn’t look happy. he was mouthing something, but sung couldn’t hear it over the static. volume button pressed, again, again, five, ten, thirteen times. the static became deafening, tempting sung to cover his ears again, but -he heard it. quiet as ever, sung needed to lean forward to make sure he was hearing correctly. a shout, in english. you know why, over and over.

his fingers fumbled for the buttons again as his heart sped up, to change the channel yet again, but there the boy was, never having left. the sound only got louder, and louder still the more times sung attempted to change the channel. what whispered shout he’d heard before was shouted in his ears now, like the words circled him, pushed closer inward with the force of static, trapping him in.

tears fell from his eyes in buckets, as if within a few minutes he might have been stranded in his own tears like alice. his hands did cover his ears then, trying to dull the sound, but it had no effect. he screamed back, “i’m sorry! i loved you! i’m sorry! please!” a litany of sorry’s continued, until his voice grew hoarse, and all that came out was static.

sung woke with a start. every bit of lining in his mouth was dry, along with a chalk filled throat and tongue. his cheeks opposed that feeling, accessorizing with streaks of salted water dripping all the way down to his chin, starting from his tear ducts.

instinct took over as sung’s hand flopped down next to him with power, only to smack upon empty bedsheets beside him. suddenly, his heart matched that of his dream self.

he couldn’t taste the blue, though the computer’s light lit up his face anyway. one leg was pulled up onto the chair, arm wrapped around it. no matter how hard he’d been trying, everything he ended up coming up with that day sounded doom and gloom. if he was thinking more clearly, more rationally, sung might have told himself to open up to that feeling, to let himself feel it enough it can dissipate with time. right then, his eyes half focused on the funnel shape of light coming off of his phone that had been left open for so long it was running on low battery.

a bad habit, that red bar was. sung wasn’t bad about charging his phone usually, but the red bar represented something else. it was the indicator of the tens of text threads that had been pushed up to the top of his messages.

you like me, right?

i’m sorry if i’ve ever hurt you.

you’ll be my friend forever? please?

i know you don’t want to talk to me...

don’t lie to me, please

it’s okay if you don’t like me

don’t leave me

one after the next, insecurities on blast. a nasty habit. sung kept to himself, when he was feeling at his lowest, for reasons like that. no one needed to shoulder his irrational mind that was bordering on manipulation. it manipulated himself, and when he let it, others.

that funnel of light had invaded every part of the studio, even into the screws lodged in the desk. there was no getting away from this, no distraction. his feelings demanded they be felt, right then, in anything he did. if someone had passed by quickly, they could feel the heady emotions pulsing out of the door. even if they didn’t pass by, they could hear it, in the wafting, wailing sounds of something akin to an empty cathedral’s organ.

a sludge-ing smack of the apartment door closing, and sung’s heart skipped a beat, momentarily paralyzed. daisuke. more than any other, his boyfriend had dealt with the brunt of his unwell text messages. between each new conversation pushed up to the top of his messages, was another message to daisuke. even then, the coned phone light crowned the king.

his writing programs laid open, nearing on sleep, unsaved, second tier to sung standing up. the chair he’d been sitting on bounced with the force of his lift, and if it were possible, the floor might have bounced with each step as he made his way to the entrance.

what might have usually been a warm, gentled welcome to the love of his life, was replaced with a trembling jaw and tightened muscles. “who have you been with all day?”

sung wasn’t the type of person to yell when he was upset. frankly, he didn’t even yell much when he was excited. but the cries coming from his mouth sounded eerily like a tinny white noise, a million cicadas seeking mates, a buzzing static of a tv.

only after his tears had drenched daisuke’s shirt, and his hands had created what seemed like permanent wrinkles, and large, warm hands, much different than his own, had sent cozy heat onto every inch of his body, could sung calm down.

another day on, his worries felt distant. at first, he required the unyielding grip of daisuke’s arms around him as he woke up, keeping him tethered to the promises he’d been given the day before. however, as the days passed, it became easier to trust in that once again, and settle his insecurities into their own box.

long after his welcomes had become once again filled with kisses and the touch of skin, was when sung finally felt ready to try to tackle those emotions, and the song he’d accidentally started.

healing was never easy, though. listening back to what he had written, and did end up remembering to save the next morning, brought back all of the terrible feelings he’d been having while writing it. no matter how far he had come to distance himself in daily life from the feelings, they still existed within him, ready to be brought to the surface at any given point.

now wasn’t that time. sung had decided as much. he’d made sure to get a decent night of sleep, and to have spent as much time with those he cared for as possible in the days leading up to this attempt. sung could handle this.

he took it from a more professional standpoint, rather than purely emotional as he had before. while what he’d written was beautiful, it was disjointed together, mixed improperly, and not in a way that was purposeful. although, he realized that it could be purposeful to have the sound a little disjointed, especially if he wrote some kind of lyric basis to the song. after having written dystopia for our songs, sung felt a little more comfortable with the idea, if not excited for such a thing.

if this song worked as an interlude of sorts, it didn’t need to be anything fancy. so, sung worked. he took all of his experiences from that terrible day, and fit them together in a song that was just a little off.

within that same day, sung finished what he’d started before, wrote lyrics, a melody for said lyrics, and mixed it together in a first draft sort of style. it was a feeling of burnout over having sat working on the same thing for so long, over burnout of the song itself, that had him packing up his day there. and with fresh eyes later on, fresh ears that could listen to the song more objectively, to think, this really could work on the album.

he’d been writing for his album long enough that he’d mixed dozens of songs with the same soundscape, a uniformity across the majority of everything he’d written for the album, so the cohesiveness necessary wasn’t a difficult task. probably, the hardest part, was the idea he’d had towards the end of producing.

static.

this song was meant to be an unabridged look into his mind that day, right? and, if there was one thing that had encapsulated every part of that day, it was that terrible sound. as an interlude, it was even more compelling. however, that meant he’d be required to capture the sound. sung considered, for a moment, asking a friend to do it for him, but... he knew this was his own battle to win.

in the end, it wasn’t as terrible as he thought it would be, even if his sweat glands and heart valves may have disagreed.

the final piece, ended up being a singer. sung didn’t think the demo recording he’d done was bad per say, considering there wasn’t a whole lot of technical skill needed for what he’d written, but it certainly wasn’t what he’d wanted.

naturally, sung turned to those close to him. while that was common for him in pretty much any scenario, his demo songs filled to the brim with demos sung by yujin, this was more of a need. he wasn’t sure who he could trust to share this with, especially before it had ever been presented to the company. for all intents and purposes, this piece was sung baring the parts of his soul that not even the people closest to him got to see often. the best -and safest- choice, was the man who had seen him that exact day, had experienced how he felt, and continued to love him anyway.

he’d gone over and over again in his head how he might approach the situation, trying to think of his words more carefully so he wouldn’t trip over them when it came to actually talking to daisuke. and he did so anyway. but, thankfully, call it the power of being in love or something, daisuke readily agreed.

even in the recording booth, sung knew that his fears had still led him to the right decision. daisuke’s voice on the track was as hauntingly beautiful as he could never attempt to pull off. by the end of that day, sung, creativity and love overflowing, had mixed the song, finishing up the last touches, to officially add to his folder for the next album review.

#fmdverification #i rly record scratched this one huh #aha yep that's me bet ur wondering how i got into this mess well lets take it back to the beginnign #refuse to fix that typo xx #self para #era: happiness #still have 7 of these bihs to go n ive been trying to write this one for like a week #will i actually finish in time Who Knows

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fourteenacross · 4 years

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end of 2019

I've done this survey every year since like, 2006 and then missed it last year because I was on a social media break. Whoops! My shitty memory makes it fairly important as a way to track the passage of time, so I'm back on the horse this year.

What did you do in 2019 that you’d never done before? I'm sure there's some specific thing, but nothing's coming to me immediately. Oh, I guess I started cross stitching? Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I'm not sure what my resolutions were for last year because I did not write them anywhere because I did not do this meme /o\ Next year: + Set up some kind of writing schedule + Finish my mg novel + Survive moving + Get a new job + Go on more dates

eta: Outside of these sort of concrete, 2do-list type goals, I set some more nebulous personal goals on Twitter: - See my local friends outside of the BFC more often - Do weird, dumb shit - Be nicer to myself - Fix my meds - Bake something fancy(Okay, that last one is kind of 2do-listy.) Did anyone close to you give birth? YES!! @caphairdadbeard had a baby and he's perfect and I love him and it kills me that he's so far away and I only get to see him a few times a year, even more so than it usually kills me having Sarah so far away. Did anyone close to you die? My former roommate's father. I did a lot of family stuff with her over the decade that we lived together and spent a lot of time with her parents and he was super loved and admired by his community. A real shitty loss all around. What countries did you visit? Just the US, but I visited Seattle and Mississippi for the first time! What would you like to have in 2020 that you lacked in 2019? ~*~Financial security~*~ What dates from 2019 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? I'm so terrible with actual dates. May 9 was Max's birthday, so there's that? We did a lovely, successful live show on April 18. OH we went to Rent Live and had our wild weekend in LA on January 26. We watched a lot of wild movie musicals at Grace and Jesse's in July. I saw Blair Witch in the woods. I went down to the city to see Octet and Hadestown. Lisa moved in with me. Moby-Dick happened. Now I'm just listing events and not dates, but there you go. What was your biggest achievement of the year? God, do I even have one? I'm not dead, so that's probably something. Oh, I guess we had a really good WBS month where we were interviewed by Forbes.com, had one of our crossovers with IDEOTV, guest edited TBD, and had our live show. That was a really satisfying few weeks. What was your biggest failure? I'm haunted by this work thing I fucked up, even though everyone has told me it wasn't a big deal. I really crash and burned out for NaNo because SAD hit me way harder and faster this year than it has in the past. Did you suffer illness or injury? Lots of brain stuff, as per usual. A couple minor colds. My FAMILY on the other hand.... What was the best thing you bought? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Tickets to Octet, maybe. It was probably my favorite show of the year. The new chair/loveseat is also very good. Whose behavior merited celebration? Some of my friends. A lot of excellent activists. Sarah's baby (he's very good). Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? Like, the whole government? Where did most of your money go? Grown-up type stuff (rent, utilities, groceries), cons, and travel. What did you get really, really, really excited about? LA, Octet, Max, DragonCon, Moby-Dick. Galentine's! What song will always remind you of 2019? Probably music from Octet? I don't like.....listen to the radio. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? Probably about the same? Maybe more stressed out by family stuff going on and money stuff. b) thinner or fatter? Same. Also, I hate this question. 2020 Kaitlyn, delete it plz. c) richer or poorer? About to be poorer. What do you wish you’d done more of? Writing. Sleeping. Going on dates. Hanging out with people. What do you wish you’d done less of? Being depressed. Being stressed. Did you fall in love in 2019? Nope. What was your favorite TV program? If we're talking "currently airing" and not "things I bingewatch that are very old," probably The Good Place--OH I almost forgot Good Omens was this year!!! Also that! And I started watching Schitt's Creek and watched all of Avatar: The Last Airbender. Oh, and I started watching some videos on the Bon Appetit YouTube channel, mostly Gourmet Makes and Making Perfect and Reverse Engineering. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? Mostly just like...........people I don't actually know who are terrible humans. What was the best book you read? Coming soon to a podcast feed near you! What was your greatest musical discovery? Probably Octet? I don't think I listened to a lot of new music this year. OH WAIT, The Highwomen!!! What a good album!!! (Also in doing the theatre section I just remembered Six was this year too!) What did you want and get? Mostly material things--clothes, cons, travel, seeing people, tickets to things, etc. Impeachment. Got that. That was nice. What did you want and not get? Financial security. A new job. Emotional stability. A relationship. More sleep. What was your favorite film of this year? Captain Marvel, although Us, Charlie's Angels, and The Wind were very good too. What was your favorite theatrical event of the year? Probably Octet! The broadway version of Hadestown was kind of disappointing compared to the 2016 NYTW version and Moby-Dick is great fun, but still pretty rough in places. Octet is just.....very good. Oh, or SIX, that was great too! Octet or Six. Oh, and, jesus, this year was a hundred years long, I totally forgot we saw Denee as Eliza this year!! She was very good!! And I got to see Daniel Breaker as Burr again and I fucking love him. What was your favorite podcast of the year? The Empty Bowl, a meditative podcast about cereal. It is so good for zoning out and being calm. TAZ has been killing it with the one-shots and the Amnesty arc, too, and this was the first year I listened to MBMBaM weekly and also I mainlined all of Sawbones after listening to half of it, then not listening to any for six months, then deciding to start from the beginning again. Unwell is a really good show that I recommend, and Mabel. The Magnus Archives killed it with season four, which was tailored to my exact narrative tastes. MFM and Criminal are perpetual faves. American Hysteria was super interesting to go through and Bear Brook and In the Dark both obviously had fucking fantastic years. Oh, and Who the Hell is Hamish? that was fun too. And I’ll stop now.

I.....listen to a lot of podcasts. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 34! On the day, I went out for dinner and drinks with some friends. That weekend, I bought a bunch of children's Captain Marvel birthday supplies and we played Jackbox games and ate cake! What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Any sort of fix to our current political mess. And/or financial stability. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2019? The "Whimsical" section on eShakti. What kept you sane? Friends! Podcasts! Anti-depressants! Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Brie Larson and Starr Busby are the first that spring to mind. What political issue stirred you the most? It’s hard to pick just one when the whole country is on fire. Who did you miss? Pretty much everyone when they are not right next to me. Sarah Bay, a lot, but I feel weird singling one person out. [This is exactly what I wrote for the last four years, but I’m keeping it because it’s still true.] Who was the best new person you met? Did I meet new people this year? I know I internet-met a couple people, but I'm not sure if I in-person made any new friends? We hung out with this girl Jenn at con a bunch, she was pretty cool! edit: oh my god MAX I met MAX this year because he did not exist last year!!! Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2019: Do not invite folks to sit on a panel unless you know they'll stick to the goddamn topic agreed on in advance. Quote a song that sums up your year: And no one grew into anything new / we just became the worse of what we were

(I think this is the third year in a row that Dave Malloy has been my lyric of the year.)

Anyway, that’s 2019 for me. I can’t say I’m sorry to see it go. The last half, in particular, was super rough. Hell, the last week was super rough--guess how many members of my family have been in the hospital in December! If you guessed “six” you would be correct!! (Everyone is more or less fine.)

But, hey, it also brought me my tiny nephew and two Dave Malloy musicals, so it wasn’t all bad!

I hope 2020 treats you all well, friends!

#stuff about me #2019 #meme

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nctinfo · 5 years

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[TRANS] KStyle interview with NCT 127 Vol.1 & 2!

Q. You have completed your first Japanese tour「NCT 127 1st Tour ‘NEO CITY : JAPAN - The Origin'」 yesterday, how are you feeling now? Yuta: I’m still in the state of lingering in the memories. First off because we got to hold this tour, I’d like to express words of gratitude towards our fans, staff and our members who worked hard together. This completely new experience became an opportunity for my confidence to grow. My mindset to show even cooler performances to our supportive fans has only become stronger.

Q. You also shed tears during the last greeting. Doyoung: The fact that our 2-month tour has come to an end was special, and the surprise event our fans prepared during the encore was touching so I let the tears flow. From the very first destination that was Osaka, to the last show in Saitama we went through a lot with our staff and members together, and thanks to our fans support we managed to complete the tour smoothly so I was really touched.

Q. With the tour being so long it seems like managing health condition must be hard. Yuta: Since we’ve spent so much time together if there's a member who’s unwell we know about it. When that happens each one of us cares and covers for the other. I myself managed to hold on till the and because of the help I’ve received from everyone. Before each stage, we all gather together and cheer for each other. Johnny: It’s also memorable when we’re in the middle of the concert on standby backstage, and we tell each other ‘Fighting!’, ‘Let’s do our best!’, ‘We can do it!’

Q. How was the tour for the newest member Jungwoo? Jungwoo: With each concert whenever I stood on the stage with the members I was happy, but on the other hand I also worried a lot. I haven’t got as much performing experience compared to the other members so I’m clumsier, and because of that, I thought I had to work extra hard. But I was still able to get a lot of experience on this tour. My performance, as well as overall acting on stage, have become more free than before so it seems like I’ve progressed. Taeyong: Jungwoo added a new charming point to our team. Through this tour he’s become a necessary part of us. Right now all of our members have fallen for Jungwoos charm kekeke Also Jungwoo is becoming more and more used to things so he’s able to show off his confidence, he’s grown so much through this tour.

Q. Haechan has joined the tour at the Saitama Super Arena as he’s only recovered from his injury, how does it feel to be back? Haechan: I was happy to be able to participate at last and my gratitude towards fans who waited and the members who filled in for me has become bigger.

Q. Please let us know of any episodes that happened when sharing room with other members on tour. Yuta: This time I was roommates with Taeil-hyung. We had 3 concert days at Saitama. Taeil-hyung surprised me with working out everyday early in the morning. After wrapping up day 1, he woke up super early on the next day and worked out. That was really something (laughs) Taeil: My mood gets better when I exercise. Yuta: Taeil-hyung has a six pack.

Q. That’s awesome! Jaehyun: It’s April Fool’s today! (laughs) Everyone: (laughs)

Q. It was a lie? Yuta: The six-pack was a lie, but the working out in the morning was real. Jaehyun: I was just rooming with Mark, and we just spent the time listening to music. And I always knew Mark is a good sleeper, but when he fell asleep in 1 minute I was really surprised. Yuta: Kinda like a manga protagonist (laughs) Taeyong: I was rooming with Doyoung or Mark a lot, and whenever we went to the convenience store I’d think ‘Let’s not buy much?’ but even then we always came back with a lot of things (laughs) We’d come back with 3 big bags of shopping, eat together while talking about one thing or another or stream on VLIVE while eating. Johnny: I’ve just been sharing a room with Jungwoo. The time has passed like water (laughs) Rather than doing anything it was a very peaceful time. Whether Jungwoo is just good at being quiet or if he didn’t exist……. (laughs) Jungwoo: (gets sulky) I’m disappointed….. Yuta: Don’t cry~ (laughs) Jungwoo: It’s a joke. We were listening to music and falling asleep while talking like other rooms…… That’s how we’ve been. Johnny: Ah! Today we promised to watch a scary movie together. Jungwoo: If other members want to watch too come to our room!

Q. Have you decided on the movie yet? Johnny: We haven’t decided yet, we’ll just look for something fun on Netflix. Jungwoo said he can’t watch alone. Jungwoo: I have to sleep with lights on. Johnny: So cute~ (laughs)

Q. Do the members usually watch horror movies together? Yuta: Recently we’ve watched two in a row. What was the title? Jungwoo: It was a movie called <Happy Deathday>. 2nd series has just come out! It’s a very fresh time loop movie. Johnny: I feel like he’s in charge of promoting the movie (laughs)

Q. Who are the members that don’t watch horror movies? Yuta: Mark and Doyoung! Mark: I don’t watch them. I’m scared~

Q. Who was Haechan rooming with? Haechan: Manager-hyung. Not a single episode here hehe Taeyong: Shall we ask manager-hyung then? (laughs) Haechan: This…. I’m sorry.

Q. You must’ve learned some new Japanese phrases at the tour? Taeyong: I’ve memorised ‘Cheers again’ from an anime. I use it at after parties. I like after parties! hehehe Jaehyun: ‘Once-in-a-lifetime bond’ Taeil: ‘Solo tour’ Johnny: ‘So there’s no regrets’, it’s something I wanted to use on the last day as the ending comment so I’ve memorised it. When I yell ‘So there’s no regrets scream!’ the fans shout with me and it makes me really happy. Mark: ‘Get home safely’

Q. Doyoung’s last greeting was entirely in Japanese. Doyoung: I wanted to speak Japanese so I was learning. I tried my best to memorise.

Q. Did you learn any gags from Yuta this time too? Yuta: I taught Jungwoo a lot. Jungwoo: It’s ‘Shall we eat something really delicious?’, ‘It’s nothing’. And ‘Bankai’ (a killer move in ‘Bleach’ manga) too!

Q. Since you’re from Osaka, do you teach them any regional dialect? Yuta: Not necessarily, but because Osaka was our first destination I’ve told them a lot. Usually, I just tell them when they ask specifically.

Q. You must’ve made a lot of memories at the Japanese tour if you were to choose only one to remain in a picture which moment would it be? Jaehyun: It actually is captured in a picture. It’s the surprise event during which fans were singing <TOUCH>. It’s a picture I want to look at over and over again. I think all members would agree? Everyone: Yes!

Q. <Wakey-Wakey>, the title track of your 1st Full Japan Album 「Awaken」 which was released on April 17th is a very powerful performance song and is packed with a lot of different parts. Which part of the choreography do you like? Taeyong: As expected it's the chorus. The choreography is eye-catching and it's a part that feels more powerful in this (already) powerful song. Yuta: Mark's rap part has an impact too, so it became a powerful chorus. Doyoung: I think the part where Johnny-hyung stands up in the first intro part is really cool. It creates the atmosphere of the song.

Q. The 'invader dance', where you move your fingers while stretching your arms sideways, is also a highlight. Speaking of invaders, there is this game called Space Invaders, which was very popular in the past, but you might not know it? Doyoung: I played a similar game though. (It was called) something like 'Galaga' Jaehyun: There was this airplane shooting game called 'RaidenX' at the arcade when I was younger. Taeyong: Although I never actually played invader, I tried my hardest to express it through my imagination.

Q. After you guys finished your concert in Fukuoka, you watched the music video of < Wakey-Wakey> together. Whose scene did you think were cool? Doyoung: Johnny-hyung's hairstyle had an impact as expected! Long hair!

Q. How did you feel with long hair? Johnny: Even though I was just dancing, it felt different from usual. I felt like my hair was dancing with me. It was like 'my whole body is one'? (laughs) Jungwoo: (bursts out laughing) Taeyong: I think everyone came out looking really cool (in the mv). The atmosphere was a little different from all the music videos we've done so far. We shot the scenes according to the individuality of the members and every scene showed the members well so I felt like the artistic feel of the music video was displayed. Taeil: I think the dance parts where we are wearing black is really cool. The set was nice, and the outfits really matched well with every member.

Q. What’s your favorite song on the album? Taeyong: I like <Kitchen Beat>. I like it as much as <Wakey-Wakey> because of the sophisticated beat and imaginative theme that feels like hip-hop. Mark: <Long Slow Distance> has a special feel to it because it's a ballad song in Japanese which the Japanese fans hear from us for the first time, and I think the members' voices go well with the song. Haechan: I like <Long Slow Distance> too. It's a ballad genre we never tried before so I hope the fans like it too. Taeil: I like R&B songs, so <Lips>. Doyoung: (I like) <Wakey-Wakey>. No wonder it's the title song too! Yuta: I like them all but I personally feel like <Kitchen Beat> is really cool! I felt the song, Jaehyun: I also like every single song, but I had a lot of fun recording <Lips> and I think the song has a great feeling to it. Jungwoo: I also like <Kitchen Beat>. Because Taeil-hyung told me I did a 'good job'! (laughs) Everyone: Oh~ (clapping) Johnny: I like <Blow My Mind> the most. I was so hooked on Doyoung's part that I could not get it out of my head for a few days. It's fun to sing and it's a song that is easy to sing, so I think the fans will like it too. Taeyong: <End to Start> too, I love it because it's a song with an intense theme from start to finish.

Q. The album title 'Awaken' has a theme of "reflecting on yourself, discovering yourself and awakening". Who is the member who seems to be awakened recently? Taeyong: I really like sweets, so I ate a lot during the tour. Recently, Jungwoo has started to like Japanese food too and is eating it well. I was awakened to Japanese food. Jungwoo: The sushi we had on the tour was the best. Fatty tuna! Johnny: I think Yuta's Japanese has awakened (laughs). Of course, it's natural for him since he's Japanese, but it's just like how my English was awakened when we were in the states. I think I was also awakened to seeing Yuta doing well on the tour and speaking Japanese. Yuta: It may be so!

Q. You guys seem to like Japanese food. Please let me know what you like most in Japan! Haechan: I really like sushi, ramen, eel on rice and Motsunabe

Q. What sushi do you like most? Haechan: Either sea urchin or salmon roe, I like fish eggs. I didn't really like eel before but I really liked it on a ricebowl in Nagayo. Taeyong: I was awakened! To eel!

Q. How about the other members? Doyoung: I like the kindness of Japan. (in Japanese) Kind! I can feel the kind and friendly culture in everything, and I'd like to learn. For example. When we go to the venue for rehearsals, all the staff will say, "Welcome~", "Let's do our best-". I felt a very warm atmosphere. Mark: I like the delicate morality of Japan. I feel like there's also meaning in the small things, and like Doyoung-hyung said, the feeling that everyone is cherished can be felt from the kindness. I really like that Johnny: When I was in the car this morning and looked outside I thought 'beautiful' as I saw the scenery. The cherry blossoms are in full bloom right now! I can feel the history of the streets and it is so beautiful. Yuta: I feel like I'm also praised when I hear these things and it makes me happy.

Q. The subject is changed but you appeared on Japan's original Korean music program 'Power of K TOKYO LIVE' on March 4th. Please let us know your impressions. Taeyong: I heard that a new K-POP themed program was made in Japan and it was a very new experience. Although we also performed, it was fun that the members were also able to show their charms through the games we played. Yuta: The venue (of the show) was where we did our showcase tour (Toyosu PIT), so as I entered the dressing room I thought 'it’s been a while'. The members talked with each other and talked about ‘the showcase we did here'. Doyoung: That's right! Jaehyun: After losing in the drawing game, Johnny-hyung and I had to show various facial expressions in the punishment game, but it was fun (laughs). Johnny: It was a punishment game that requires fast reaction skills, but I think it worked out well. Some facial expressions came out I didn't even know I could to, please check on air to confirm(laughs)!

Q. <NCT LIFE> will also broadcast on 'Kchan! HallyuTV'. It was shot in different places every season, please tell us about your memories or back stories. Doyoung: It was a fun and good experience to go to various countries. Even though we were shooting for the show, it felt like I was traveling with the members. I want to continue doing <NCT Life> if the chance is there in the future. Yuta: Where do you want to go next? Taeyong: Hawaii! Doyoung: I want to go to Hawaii too! America would be nice too.

Q. What were other sides of the members which got discovered while shooting <NCT LIFE>? Doyoung: We did a Yuta-tour in Osaka (NCT Life season 7: Osaka). Yuta-hyung planned everything we did during the trip, he really prepared it in earnestly. It was like he created a portfolio Yuta: yeah, that's right (laughs) Doyoung: He had never shown this deliberate image during our practices (laughs) I was really surprised. Taeil: When we just debuted we did sports in Paju to build on our unity (<NCT Life> season 3: Paju), I remember playing games and eating BBQ together. Mark also made fried eggs (Mark didn't know how to fry a sunny-side-up egg and the mess he created was highlighted) Mark: Yes! Sorry (laughs) Taeil: It was fun because it rather seemed like we were playing around instead of shooting a show. Johnny: In Chiangmai, Thailand (<NCT LIFE> season 6: Chiang Mai) the members celebrated my birthday with a surprise, but I was really surprised. However, I remember Taeyong more, who was beside was, also getting fooled/surprised (laughs). I was getting nervous because Doyoung's condition wasn't good but I relaxed when learned it was a prank and I was able to have fun and celebrate.

Q. In Chiang Mai, Doyoung was impressive for answering all the questions during the game to guess the name of the animals in Safari Park so well. Taeyong: Doyoung's intelligence was proven. Johnny: On the contrary, I was angry at myself for not remembering any of them. After that (game), I started to respond with 'name' without knowing (laughs).

Q. Jungwoo hasn't been able to participate in a shooting yet, but if you were to go, where would you wanna go to? Jungwoo: I really want to go to Hawaii too. I heard it's a good place and there are a lot of things to see so I became curious after hearing so much about it.

Q. Amongst the members, who is has the best sense for variety shows? Johnny: excluding me, it's Yuta (laughs) Taeyong: Though Yuta has variety sense, I think Jungwoo's variety sense isn't a joke either. So we have to do <NCT Life> again. Mark: I also think Jungwoo will be a hit. Jungwoo: I think it might be difficult with cameras in front of me...... I'll do my best, though.

Q. Finally, is there a message you want to give to our readers. Taeyong: On April 17th, our new album 「Awaken」 was released and we hope it receives much attention. Through this tour of Japan, I felt that everyone in Japan was looking forward to us, and my heart was full. We will continue to grow and strive to show only good images. Thank you very much for interviewing us like this today. We will be glad to take this opportunity again in the future.

Translation: Alex, Esmee @ FY! NCT (NCTINFO) | Source: Kstyle (1, 2) | KOR (1, 2) — Do not repost or take out without our permission!

#NCT #NCT 127 #taeil #johnny #taeyong #yuta #doyoung #jaehyun #jungwoo #mark #haechan #t:interview #t:trans #kstyle

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nightofnyx8 · 5 years

Text

Robstar Week Day 4: Fever

I tried my best to put a little twist on the theme, even if the story kind of ends the same. But I hope you enjoy nonetheless!

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The sun was breaking quickly through the horizon, its steaming rays slipping into the small room where Dick slept. He could hear the robins chirping away happily, the smell of bacon wafting in from under the kitchen door of the trailer. Usually this kind of morning got him up and running, but he today he ducked his head under the covers.

He felt like he had been hit by a sledgehammer, feeling cold and hot all at the same time. His body burned under the thin quilt, yet his teeth chattered spontaneously. Maybe if he could just slip back into sleep he would feel better.

A sharp rapping at his door interrupted the quiet morning.

"Come on, Dick." The muffled voice called from behind. "Come eat your breakfast so we can get to practice."

Dick got up painfully and rubbed his eyes. Thoughts of the show that night ran dully through his head—there was no getting out of this one. He slowly dragged himself out of bed and shivered as he changed into his costume. Apparently he took too long because the rapping started again.

"Dick, sweetheart let's go!"

He suppressed a smile. He normally didn't listen to anyone giving him orders, but when his mother was involved, it was an entirely different story.

The Graysons ate a hurried breakfast and quickly headed over the main circus tent. The familiar musty scent filled the air, a mix of animals and old canvas rolled into one. Dick was greeted by Zitka, who immediately searched him for food with her trunk the moment she saw him.

"Not now, girl. I gotta go practice." He slipped her small handful of peanuts and trotted over to where his parents were waiting.

A few minutes later, he stood on top of the wooden platform, the ground looming far below him. Usually this sight didn't bother him, but today it made him feel woozy.

"You alright, sweetheart?" His mother reached over to him, but he shooed her away, knowing she would only worry.

"Yeah Mom, I'm fine." He took hold of the trapeze and swung himself forward, feeling the sensation of flight filling his whole body. The wind whistled though his ears and blew through his hair, and couldn't help wishing that he could never again be a victim to gravity.

He finally reached the opposite platform where his father was waiting and surged forward to stick a perfect landing, but his vision doubled before him. He landed quite clumsily, taking two wobbly steps before falling flat on his face.

"Dick!" He heard his father shout after him, running across the platform.

He could soon feel his mother holding him, his father's hand checking his temperature.

"He's got a fever, Mary." His father stated worriedly. "A high one."

"We've got to get him home as quickly as possible." She agreed, rising with Dick in her arms. "He's not performing tonight."

Dick woke up later, back in his bed and a stack of damp towels on top of his forehead. His mother fawned over him and wiped the sweat off his neck.

"Mom?"

"Hey sweetheart, how are you feeling?"

"Like I just got run over by Zitka."

His mother laughed. "You'll be alright after some rest, my little robin."

"Mom, don't call me that." He complained. "I already get laughed at for the costume."

She smiled, but turned serious as she ran her fingers through his sweaty hair.

"Dick, why didn't you tell us you were sick? You could have stayed in bed this morning."

He looked into his mother's eyes—a clear, sharp blue that pierced his conscience. He knew how hard she worked every day to run a circus, train as a professional acrobat, and raise a family all at the same time.

"I just didn't want to worry you. The show tonight was going to be really big, and you and Dad were always training and working to make sure the routine was perfect and—"

"Oh Dick." She kissed his clammy forehead. "That doesn't matter to me. You are much more important."

His face turned red as she hugged him, to which he responded, "Mom, you're smothering me again."

His mother laughed. "Alright, alright. Now get back to sleep before you get any worse." She pinched his cheek playfully and turned off the light.

"Sweet dreams, my little robin."

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Mom.

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He shot forward, his vision blurring before his eyes. He thought he heard a small "eep!" somewhere off to the side.

His surroundings came into focus after a few seconds. He was in his room, in the tower.

Oh yes, that's right.

She wasn't here anymore.

He looked over to see a figure sitting next to him, her green eyes unmistakably bright.

"Starfire?"

She looked quite startled, as she must have been close to him when he suddenly jerked awake. The damp towel she was using now lay discarded on the floor.

"Robin, are you alright?" she asked tentatively.

He blinked hard a couple times, trying to register the fact that his alien girlfriend was actually next to him. In his room.

"Yeah, I think so." He responded. "What, what happened? All I remember are the sirens going off."

Starfire bit her lip. "We were fighting Plasmus. But you became quite unstable and fell unconscious. We brought you here to your room to rest, and Cyborg commanded me to be here to assure that you 'stayed there' as he put it."

"Oh." He squinted in the fading light outside his window, realizing it was much brighter than usual. He reached up instinctively to his face, feeling for the mask. There was nothing there.

"I am sorry." Starfire pulled out his mask and placed it in his hands. "You looked to be in great pain, so I removed it."

Robin looked down at the mask in his hands. For years it had been somewhat of his first line of defense. A protection against vulnerability. Even though he and Starfire were dating, and the mask had come off for the first time a couple weeks back, he still felt unnatural without it.

But he placed it on the bedside table, not wanting to make Starfire feel bad. He turned and found her staring intently at him, her eyes conveying a thousand different emotions.

"Robin, you are certain you are alright? I believe there is something else that troubles you." She felt his forehead, and then slowly, hesitantly, reached for his face. He took her hand in caught it against his jaw, her touch unusually cool against his feverish skin.

"I'm alright, Star." He said quietly. "I promise."

She didn't look convinced, but resumed to cooling his neck with the towel. "Why did you not inform us that you were unwell this morning? Fighting Plasmus has only worsened your condition."

"Evil can't be ignored because I decide to get sick, Starfire. My health takes second to that."

Starfire frowned. "That is not true. Evil is not worth hurting yourself over. I was…truly worried for you"

Robin kicked back the covers and started to get out of bed. "I have to get back to work. Plasmus is still out there."

"Robin please, you must rest!" She insisted "For now, Plasmus does not matter. You are much more important."

He froze.

"What did you say?"

She blushed slightly. "Please just rest, Robin. You do not need to push yourself so hard."

He stood still, his mind trying to replay the events that had just unfolded. It had been a while since he had dreamed of his parents. In all the chaos of the Brotherhood of Evil and traveling to Tokyo, his nightmares had plenty more to focus on. Until now.

He didn't like people worrying about him. He wasn't worth all that fuss and effort. And he knew better than anyone that he wasn't exactly the easiest patient to care for, physically or emotionally. Plus, no one needed to waste their efforts on the poor little boy wonder with no parents.

But now she was right in front of him, her hand hovering above his chest to prevent him from going back to work. Her eyebrows creased with worry, her eyes begging him to rest. And then it clicked for Robin. She was there for him through the thick or thin, whether he liked it or not. He didn't need to close himself off from her.

Robin looked at her, as though seeing her for the first time. He took her face in his hands, trying to memorize every detail of her expression.

And then he was kissing her, feeling his heartbeat throb against his chest. He seemed to forget that he was running a high fever and the heat that rose to his cheeks was not helping one bit.

It was only until the fact registered in his mind that he was probably giving his own fever to his girlfriend that he broke the kiss. She looked up at him with a smile, but her eyes still screamed a thousand questions.

"I'm sorry." He said, relaxing back on the bed. "I just, well…"

She said nothing, only listening, as if trying to physically hold every word he said.

He smiled, pulling out a small family album from a compartment above his bed.

"Alright, I'm not getting up." He assured her, slipping the small album into her hands. "But I owe you an explanation. But first, there are a few people that I would like you to meet."

#robstarweek2019 #robstar #fanfiction #writing #dc #teentitans #robstarweek 2019 #look at who actually wrote robstar instead of just dickkory

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