#i’m so fucking tired of this as a queer writer. i’m so tired.

[thatone-churro]

i was gonna make this addition to someone else’s post but it got longer than expected and i really didn’t wanna do that to them after they said they were done talking about it in regards to their own work.

i don’t know if “bugs” or “irks” are quite the right words for how i feel, but this take certainly does something of the sort to me.

i hate that the concept of “bury your gays” and its related discourses are so quickly applied to ALL queer media. it’s completely stripped of its original context/meaning and i know THAT irks me to no end.

personally, i’m of a mind that queers deserve media about them, about queers, and also about tragedy, death, murder, action and suspense, or whatever the occasion is. it can be about the queer cast while not having a happy ending, or without the cast being perfect.

“casually queer” is how i used to describe my personal project. yes, it’s blatantly and unapologetically queer, and that queerness is important, but it’s not the focus of the story. it’s not the point of the story. there’s still action, still adventure, still death, still tragedy. the cast isn’t perfect, some die, some are awful, some are “problematic,” even the queer cast. most things happen to the queer cast, because most of the major cast is queer.

i don’t understand the idea of condemning a work for “problematic queer characters” if it’s just a primarily queer work. you can’t have a queer story with no conflict or have realistic characters that are perfect. you want a queer story, but no, no, the queer characters can’t be problematic. and the problematic trait they describe is simply just. a character flaw exploited for the sake of the narrative. i don’t get it.

a queer story written for queers shouldn’t be perfect and pure. there should be “problematic” things. there should be tragedy. they shouldn’t have to be pure. they shouldn’t have to be perfect. they shouldn’t be shunned by the community they were created for because they told an otherwise typical story, except now it’s queer. queer stories, or any story, should be allowed to be complex. there should be nuance. not everything in it should be likable. that’s how a story works.

using my story as an example, again, my all-time favorite character and one of my main protagonists for a good chunk of it is a nonbinary lesbian on ace-spectrum. okay. cool. lots of rep there. but they’re heavily flawed. they kill. they have regrets. they make stupid decisions. they’re self-righteous. they’re terrified of being the bad guy yet end up the bad guy in many people’s views. they have one very violent motive. they love their family to such an extent that they’ll destroy anyone who lays a hand on them. they’re complex. they’re nuanced. they’re not always the good guy. that’s how a story is. if they were a perfect, pure, “perfect” character, there would be no story. no enjoyable story, at least.

what baffles me the most is when queer creators make these queer stories and suddenly they’re a bad queer because they killed one of their many queer characters, for instance. i’ll use my project once more for an example. say, remember that nonbinary ace lesbian from less than a paragraph ago? yeah, i ended up killing them at one point. their story was over and while it hurt me, too, it was a necessary step for the story. their story was over and i needed them to start the next chapter of the next protagonists’ story. but as a nonbinary ace lesbian myself, does that make me a “bad queer?” am i suddenly evil if i killed off my sapphic couple that got marrie in the first part because their story was over and there was no other way to move on their daughter’s story with them there? am i the asshole for killing one of my ace characters for a narrative purpose? am i not allowed to do certain things to my queer characters anymore if i don’t want to be a “bad queer?”

i guess these feelings boil down more to how strictly puritan culture and/or cancel culture and/or “problematic” culture has invaded the literary scene and how that impacts me, a queer writer. how are we supposed to tell these stories that people beg for if they are torn down and torn apart for the exact nuances they want? how are we supposed to create anything without relentless scorn or fear of being “cancelled” for thematic complexities? i don’t understand it.

in conclusion:

i realize my opinion on the subject is probably HEAVILY swayed by my own tastes and preferences and i have no idea where i’m going with this anymore and there’s not really an argument here anymore so really this whole thing can be taken with a grain of salt.

anyway, that’s my angry rant for the day. please don’t witch hunt me for it, thanks 🤞

#do you people understand how exhausting this gets for queer creators. do you. #when you’re so quick to get up in arms with pitchforks and torches how are we supposed to create? #‘i want more complex queer stories! no wait not like that.’ what are we supposed to do. #how can we create when those creations are shunned and when we (as queer creators) get ‘cancelled’ for it #do you understand. do you get what this does to your own community. #you can’t want more from us when you openly reject what we put out. #i’m so fucking tired of this as a queer writer. i’m so tired. #someone can probably explain this in a nicer/more formal way but i’ve already written two essays this week i’m not writing another for this #grace being kinda serious for once #text post #lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbtq community #literature #what do i tag this?? #lgbtq creators #discourse #< i guess #long post

[waterberry-strawmelon]

WAS ANYONE GONNA TELL ME THE HEX GIRLS ARE IN MYSTERY INCORPORATED OR—

#HOLY SHITTTTT #anyways I’m trying the show out! it’s not the *best* but I mean. Listen if I’ve been watching Ben 10 and can tolerate that show’s crappy #qualities? I can definitely enjoy this! It’s chill. Not the best ever but entertaining! #I will say that at least so far (early season 1) Velma’s characterization (and Daphne’s for that matter) is… kinda hard to watch. #the sexist “overbearing girlfriend” trope is so fucking tired. Idc if the writers intended for her to be gay (which I’ve heard is more #evident in Season 2 anyway) it still stinks. #And the way Daphne’s entire personality revolves around Fred #This version of her feels more like something you’d see in a mocking parody of Scooby Doo; not in an actual version of it! #Also I just. I fucking love Fred. I love him so much #The entire gang is queer in some way and no one can convince me otherwise <3 #mine

[lylethewaterguy]

Reminder to self: never read the comment section on anything queer ever

#goes double for comic book stuff #all I wanted was just to see other people like me discussing it #why do bigots have to ruin absolutely fucking everything #just because they’re too stupid to know that coming out means coming OUT #it means you’re revealing unknown info #no that character wasn’t straight before #no that character wasn’t cis before #you just assumed that they were #and maybe the writers were even writing them to be #but then they realised they were wrong and came out #like millions of queer people do every day #god I hate having to deal with homophobia and transphobia every fucking day #why can’t they just leave us alone #I’m so tired

[booksandpaperss]

idk who exactly on this tag needs to hear this but it’s definitely a lot of you:

it is perfectly okay for a fanfic writer to have Mike and Will having physical and sexual thoughts about each other. They are teenagers and it completely normal for allosexual and even acespec teenagers to have sexual thoughts about the person or people they like. Yes adult fanfic writers can do this too it’s literally not weird as long as it’s written respectfully and accurately, and I’m actually so fucking tired of all this discourse that is so clearly rooted in people feeling uncomfortable with two boys being sexually attracted to each other, or even queer teenagers in general having sexual thoughts about each other.

I do think it’s weird to write explicit sex scenes between minors and especially in this case when these characters are represented by real people with real bodies who were minors while filming the vast majority of the show, but honestly anything suggestive between two 14/15 year olds and up that’s not explicit and/or sexualized is normal. And before any of you come at me saying I’m sexualizing minors, you can fuck right off bc I am 17 and I am sick and tired of teenagers and especially queer teenagers being shamed for sexual thoughts that are perfectly normal.

I understand if you personally are not comfortable reading and writing anything suggestive, that is fine bc I have a solution for you! Wanna guess what it is??

Just. Don’t. Read it.

If it’s content u don’t like, simply don’t interact!!! No one is forcing you to read or write anything that you don’t want to, so simply don’t. It’s that easy 😱

I will say though, that if reading an even vaguely suggestive thought in a byler fic makes you extremely uncomfortable, maybe you should take a moment to ask yourself why that is. Bc love between teenagers is not all fluffy and pure and innocent, and its honestly way weirder to have that ideal than to write teens having sexual thoughts, so maybe do some self reflection. If you’re ace and suggestive content in general makes u feel weird then that’s different, but if that’s not the case then if you’re allo and u still feel this way… idk just take a moment to check and see if you’re internalizing anything before complaining about it and spreading legitimately harmful discourse.

So, to recap:

-it’s normal for teenagers to have suggestive thoughts about each other and it’s normal to write it

-writing teenagers having sexual thoughts and making out with each other is not sexualizing, fellow queer ppl who think this literally why do u hate ur community so much 😑

-anything short of an explicit smut scene between minors is fine as long as it’s done accurately and respectfully

-it is still weird to write explicit smut in the byler fandom specifically (and any other ship between teens in ST) just bc you’d be describing the bodies of real people that were minors until very recently with actors who have stated that they’re not comfortable being sexualized like that, but first and foremost…

-…if something makes you uncomfortable or you don’t like it, simply don’t interact

-stop shaming queer teenagers for being physically attracted to each other, and stop idealizing teenage queer love as something completely pure and innocent, if you’re going to do that, please keep it to yourself

If after reading this post you 1). want to block me bc you think this whole post was sexualization or 2). plan to use this argument as an excuse to actually sexualize minors and write hardcore explicit smut between them, block me. Weird reformed purity culture is not welcome on my blog and neither are people who enjoy sexualizing minors. Fuck you ❤️

#this goes for any fandom pulling this shit but I’ve noticed it a lot on the byler tag #I’m STILL seeing it even after we’ve already closed this discussion multiple times #byler #byler tumblr #byler fandom #elli talks byler #elli talks stranger things

[bubblinelovechild]

The RWBY fandoms treatment of Adam makes me very uncomfortable

This is very long sorry I was rambling <3

There’s something really odd about the dedication RWBY fans have to hating Adam. So much so that they’ll admit the writing of the WF is racist but refuse to admit that Adam a member of the white fang also suffered from that racist writing.

There’s this weird dedication to pretending there are no problems with the choices made around Adams character and vilifying literally everyone who tries to talk about it, for the sake of continuing to blindly hate him. The fandom seems to struggle with understanding that the show is fictional and everything that happens in it is a direct choice of its writers. Y’all talk about Adam like he is a real person who has personally offended you irl. Just a huge lack of media literacy tbh.

A white man wrote a civil rights group, that he admittedly based off the black panthers, as the generic bad guys of his shitty anime knockoff and made a central theme of the show the idea that fighting against your oppression violently makes you just as bad if not worse than your oppressors. Then he mad the leader of that group a generic abusive meanie bad guy. Who essentially is what white supremacists think civil rights activist are all the way down to being the fictional equivalent of a black supremacist.

When there was backlash to this he made a knockoff Malcom X and then killed her in her only scene and made a character whose ideology is basically sit down and lick the feet of your oppressors and had the audacity to say he was based off of MLK. How the fuck do you base a character off of somebody without doing basic research on them because contrary to what people seem to believe MLK was not a doormat and this is a conversation for a different day but I’m sick and tired of his memory being weaponised against black people.

What’s worse is that Adam is the only character portrayed as actually doing something to fight racism. Ghira’s faction is only ever seen fighting against other groups. I don’t know if y’all know this but that’s not how the civil rights movement worked. Most of the leaders didn’t agree on methods but they coexisted because the main goal was the liberation of black people and they knew they had to coexist. MLK did not go around calling the cops on revolutionaries he disagreed with.

The problems with Adam and the WF are not separate and cannot be. Most of what’s wrong with the Faunus plot line is the way the show handles Adam. The choices made with his writing cannot be separated from those they made with the WF overall. Adams choice to kill his attackers to keep himself and other Faunus safe, from people literally trying to kill them, is treated the way it is because of the stance they took with WFs writing. When Adam kills a human supremacist trying to kill Ghira you’re supposed to see it as an extreme and the beginning of his turn to evil. Adam isn’t a real person every descisiom he makes is informed by the white writers of the show. Why would the bias they displayed writing the WF not apply to him?

Some of you have been abused and relate to Blake in that sense, a lot of you seem to be projecting your abusers onto Adam. I’m sorry you went through that but you are not excused from buying into racist rhetoric. It’s incredibly uncomfortable as a black person to watch people talk about how “healing” it was for them to watch a civil rights leader admittedly inspired by black people slapped around and killed by two white women. It is anger inducing to watch fans celebrate “queer representation” dancing on the corpse of a monumental disrespect to black people and our history.

RWBY doesn’t even handle abuse well tbh and most of the queer rep is not that great, there are many shows that do it so much better, there is actually no excuse for hanging on to the black people are bad for fighting against racism show.

#before you start no i don’t give a shit about bumblebee #this really isn’t about them #i wouldn’t have had a problem of killing the civil rights leader wasn’t treated as a bee moment #this is probably the only post I’ll make on that show #im going back to strictly reblogs #let’s hope this doesn’t get me death threats #rwde

[ceo-of-sloppy-men]

I am sick and tired of America controlling the internet and putting other people in other countries on edge

if you haven’t heard about KOSA, google it, I beg you. Because it is targeted at Tumblr. Specifically.

As a Canadian writer, it is terrifying to even have to entertain the idea that my space may be taken away from me because some fuck ass transphobic shit heads want to control everyone else. It’s even more terrifying as a queer content creator. We aren’t hurting anyone, but going after fandom spaces under the guise of protecting children is.

Where is this same fire for R34 sites which could be actively harmful to your kids? I for one was a child with unrestricted internet access and was severely fucked up by r34 sites (and Twitter). I have seen shit I cannot unsee, no matter how hard I want to. Tumblr, Ao3 and wattpad were actually beneficial to me because they taught me how to healthily express my creativity and nursed my writing & art skills. They (the makers of the bill) don’t want that. They don’t give a flying fuck about kids and their internet safety - if they did they would have much different approaches. What they actually want is to go after queer spaces so they can control everyone. Because if they control what is online, everyone can fall into the alt right pipelines with no other option or voices to listen to. They can silence us all. They want to silence us all. They want queer youth and adults alike so they feel alone and wrong, and curl up in on themselves until we go underground again.

This needs to be talked about. Especially now, because they are doing it while all the focus is on the writers strike and the anti trans bills, so they can slip this one under the radar until it’s too late.

I’m Canadian so I know little in the way of how to stop your American bill process. So do your own research and fight back! Contact your local representative, share information, for once in your life scream from the damned roof tops.

If shit does get shut down here, I will move this blog to Pillowfort and definitely find some other places to post fanfic. If ao3 fully goes down, I will repost some of my fics, such as White Lies. I refuse to be silenced because some pasty ass republicans want me to open wide for their shrivelled penis all thanks to a body I had no control over selecting.

#kosa bill #KOSA #read me #internet safety #internet #tumblr #american politics #tw transphobes

[wanderingwomanwondering]

Reading the Wright interview about Loki was like being hunted and gutted for sport. He actually said with his whole fucking chest ‘I don’t know jack about queerness and feel no obligation to figure that shit out’. LIKE. BRO. WHAT. Loki is canonically genderfluid and bisexual, so if writers are unwilling or unable to tell full-on, multidimensional queer stories then said writers (and execs) should FIND PEOPLE WHO WILL OR FUCK OFF like the cowards they are!!!

Oh and don’t blame the audience if you as a writer have no clue what distinguishes platonic relationships and romantic relationships! Spoiler alert, my guy, it’s neither the gender of the people in the relationship nor your obvious discomfort with queer relationships in your media!! And stop lying…platonic relationships among men on screen are a dime a dozen, especially in high budget mainstream media. Healthy one’s are a dollar a dozen but they absolutely exist and are available/accessible.

You know what’s actually painfully hard to come by tho? Healthy, unapologetic, complex, nuanced, well-told mlm/queer stories. Queer folks are expected to live our lives via coding and subtext in big media (fucking Disney), barely out loud (a SINGLE throwaway line in Lamentis!) and definitely no unambiguous on-screen happy endings.

Good god I’m so damn tired of my life and experiences, my queerness being just a ‘beautiful’ interpretation or a profound mystery in the pea-brains of big budget mainstream media writers and execs. I’m tired of idiots hunting me for sport in half-baked articles about authorial intent. They constantly play dumb and act like they have absolutely no way to level the fuck up and unlock a queer media achievement! As if smaller productions haven’t been doing that very thing for fucking decades!!

I don’t know about y’all but it’s *exhausting* being a ‘beautiful’ concept to these asshats instead of an actual person with a story that deserves to be told!!

#lokius #loki x mobius #loki series #disney #marvel cinematic universe #mobius #loki #marvel

[scarrletmoon]

it's izzy hands it's kylo ren it's billy from stranger things it's snape it's draco it's loki circa 2012-2014 it's a REPEATED PATTERN throughout all of fandom of an antagonistic white guy getting a devoted fanbase that is both disproportionate to his importance in the story and also misunderstands the white guy's role as an antagonist. they think their mean little guy is a misunderstood victim and they base their entire fandom experience around him. and then in season 2 ofmd went and redeemed izzy before killing him off to further ed's arc, something that is a solid choice from a technical writing standpoint but from a fandom perspective it built the izzy fans up into thinking they were right about how izzy has never been homophobic, izzy is a poor downtrodden abuse victim, and from day one izzy has been a protector and the only competent guy around and a loyal and dutiful first mate. and possibly the most significant part is that so many izzy fans have accidentally and unknowingly tricked themselves into thinking that izzy is a main character bc their fandom engagement revolves so heavily around izzy that they forgot the actual show itself doesn't, so they were completely blindsided by a death that has been foreshadowed since season one ("im not dying, not for that twat and not for you" and "only retirement we get is death" and the whole "plumb the depths, man" sequence where izzy was talking to stede through a death shroud ffs). and i want so bad to just ignore it but we literally got a queer romcom centered around an interracial couple and an incredibly diverse cast and an indigenous main character and a diverse writer's room and the season ended on a happy note and it's all about queer joy AND YET. soooooooo much of the post-season discussion has to center around the white side character!!! even in death izzy hands takes up a disproportionate amount of the fandom conversation and im exhausted. it's every fandom! every fucking time!! this isnt anything new this is the same time-honored fandom tradition of white man favoritism YET A-FUCKING-GAIN and im SO FUCKING TIRED OF IT!!!!!!!!!

(i get so scared when i turn on anon bc i’ve consistently gotten such shitty, cowardly messages through it but i’m glad this isn’t one of them lmao)

i know i’ve said this 374748 times but the last time i made the kylo ren/snape/white villain connection on twitter (i mean that’s on me, it’s twitter) i had people legit furious with me for calling them nazis which………..i literally never said

and i get the frustration. trust me, I GET IT. the white villain problem smashes right into white fragility and makes it almost impossible to talk about any of it. it means, like you said, that we’re talking about a fucking white side character in cast of amazing, nonwhite talent, because some people can’t handle confronting the fact that whiteness insulates them from the realities of racism, and that their ignorance and hostility makes them active participants in white supremacy

(and it’s really hard to explain this to people who’ve been taught that racism is when slurs and white klan hoods, because then they’ll say and do the most vile shit and CRY or fight you when you gently try to explain the racist shit they just did)

and because fandom is very queer as well as very white, we also have to contend with the kinds of white people who think that queerness somehow negates their whiteness. that they can’t express their privilege in contexts involving POC. that we’re making shit up to be victims and to minimize their pain on purpose. and time and time again, i have had my queerness erased by white people, so they feel comfortable ignoring criticism i only ever shared bc i was hoping for something better

i’ve said it again and again and again and AGAIN that it’s ESPECIALLY depressing seeing white people close ranks in ofmd fandom especially BECAUSE it has such a diverse cast and doesn’t shy away from discussing racism in all the ways it manifests. like, most of the racism in the show isn’t even subtle and y’all STILL elected to ignore it? do y’all not feel ANY shame about that?

and some of them don’t! bc they think we’re infiltrators. bc they’re only a few steps removed from “they will not replace us” as they see more POC try to join fannish spaces. and they’ll pretend they’re not trying to push us out bc they’re marginalized in other ways — deliberately ignoring the fact that they’re also crushing their fellow queer, disabled and marginalized community

so you’re tired? yeah. me the fuck too. we deserve so much better

#scarrlet answers

[keepittoyourshelf]

I’ve been thinking far too much lately, about BG3 of course because the hyper fixation is only just starting to wane now after 4 months.

Anyways, I am tired of certain members of the fan community inferring that women players shouldn’t pursue Astarion because he shows a clear preference for men. I don’t disagree that in-game dialogue that I have personally seen re: his past dalliances have shown them to be exclusively male. I am not sure if that was a conscious choice on the part of writers, but if it was, I suspect it has more to do with driving home the canonicity of his identity as a queer character in general than it does saying he’s a gay character that can choose to be with women only if the player forces him to.

It’s funny that nobody raises this issue with Halsin, another enthusiastically pansexual character, and I would bet my life on the reason behind that being that Halsin is your stereotypical burly outwardly masculine character, whereas Astarionis decidedly foppish and more delicate in appearance.

Boiled down it seems like a lot of people think that body hair and a messy hairdo makes a canonically pansexual male character “less gay” than another and therefore a more valid romantic option for women.

I’m not going to get into how there is so much more to Astarion (or Halsin for that matter) than his physicality. But certain types of people (i.e. neckbeards and incels) can’t wrap their head around the fact that a character that moves beyond the borders of their limited, one dimensional concept of masculinity could be enthusiastic about fucking a woman. I’m not excluding people that are members of the homosexual community that might be advocating for the fact that Astarion is clearly gay either. They’re a problem too just in smaller numbers.

I mean this poor, wonderful vampire man, so obviously in need of love, is literally accepting all comers (no pun intended I know Astarion hates puns) and because he’s flamboyant and pretty it’s somehow less believable?

I dunno, I get that people are overprotective of stuff they love and there’s this weird instinct to claim things so your obsession seems somehow more validated or whatever. And I probably would feel stupid having daydreams about gay men wanting to sleep with me (real or fake) if they were explicitly stated to be gay.

Astarion’s pansexuality isn’t implied, it’s confirmed, so don’t piss in my cornflakes and let me enjoy playing out the vampire romance dreams I’ve been harboring since I first read Interview With the Vampire in 1994. Like this is the closest I’ll ever get to realizing my dream of Lestat being real and me getting to make out with him and have him tell me I’m pretty so let me just have it for fuck’s sake.

Interesting side note about Lestat, he is yet another character who shows overwhelming textual evidence of being what some would consider gay (flamboyant, dramatic, into fashion) yet can appreciate and enjoy the beauty of women as well. For whatever reason though folks seem to think women have less of a “claim” over Astarion than Lestat, so whatever.

Tldr: Astarion is a man of prodigious appetites, and sometimes he wants tits and pussy and that’s okay.

They’re both hot, they both want my Tav, so fuck off.

#baldur’s gate astarion #bg3 astarion #astarion bg3 #astarion ancunin #baldur’s gate halsin #bg3 halsin #halsin silverbough #bg3 #baldur’s gate 3

[ace-and-ink]

i’m fine with gore but that poem made me want to puke. it might’ve been the body or it might’ve been the boy. how he touched her insides on the outside and never asked. and sure, she let him, but surely he could see that she trusted him and he still made her the villain for hiding the best parts of herself and the way she kept them from his hands. every day i thank something up there that i never let them touch me like that. the way they brag about being touched. and it’s a cool, cool party, i hope i don’t come back again. and i wanna use a big word and make you think i’m a good writer. i wanna paint an image that’s as visceral as a car wreck and make you squirm like it’s your organs being fondled. yet still she doesn’t turn the speaker off. we’re not just sharing our voices anymore. she’s sitting on the corner of her bed and i’m howling. the lyrics are pouring from my throat like the bile they fed to me without feeding me. the wall is a hypothetical that may not have touched me yet but i can see that it might’ve. maybe she doesn’t turn the speaker down and hears my raw chords to hear my bleeding and coughing chest. maybe she turns the speaker up and keeps me from tainting the song any further. all the women in my class cross their legs. all the dudes slouch in their chair and spread their legs. i can look the part, but i can’t hide the queer. call me L. call me A. call me NB. call me Q for short. she nodded along when the sexualization of bisexuals was brought up. i want to sit down in front of her and ask “What are you? What are you? What are you? Is it my place to know? Would i understand if you told me? Do i have a chance with you?” is what i really want to ask. if i could say what i meant would they get it. would it be worth the isolation. drunk boys in ice cream shops. i wrote about them as a warm-up. i’m tired of them. it’s not their job to know right away but that doesn’t mean i can’t be annoyed. i haven’t gone out to get it in a while. she promised she was sober as she pulled a bottle of wine from her purse. tired. that’s what i always am. of having too much time. of not having enough. of certain people. of coughing so close to me. of not having certain people. of the thought of certain people. of never having the balls to man up and ask. just literally tired. no sleep is enough. i wish i knew how to end this poem. poems don’t have neat endings. that was lesson one. it ends when it needs to end. but art’s never really finished. the majority of playwriting is rewriting. so i guess i’ll keep talking. i said three sentences. six words. my heart was beating out of my chest. i’m not allowed to use abstractions, so i hope this is literal enough: i realized my dad was right when he said i needed to be on his anxiety meds “just to take the edge off.” i want to be able to write about someone the way Lucy Dacus does in Home Video. Hang Me Like Jesus still fucks me up. i don’t cry to Damocles anymore but i wrote about it the other day. i like rocks and rock. and rats. and women. i’m half on youtube half in my notes and now my phone is burning up. i tried typing “phone is” and my phone number came up in auto suggestions. how did this poem start again. how did we get here. do we like it here. do we want to stay here. i think i like it here. i’m never sure of anything.

— a practice in line breaks and not making sense

#see the title is ironic because. because. i don’t. see i told you my titles actually mean something relative to the poem itself. #the patron saint of asexual poets #poetry #poem #poems #original poems #original poetry #original poem #original writing #creative writing #poets on tumblr #writers on tumblr #lgbtq poem #lgbtq poetry #lgbtq poet #lgbtq poems

[dekusleftsock]

I think if hori wrote toga better more people would like her but he hardly gives a shit about her so her story and personality and thoughts are messy (as in badly written) and nonsensical. I wanna like her but you have to do a lot of leg work to make her interesting and worth the time and love, Hori doesnt love her enough to but a lot of effort into her, unlike the other two male villains who he wont shut up about. Togas always just been (for me personally) an underutilized, underdeveloped waste of what could have been a cool idea. The Anti-toga people are not unfounded in most of their criticisms (MOST), shes the only seemingly queer person and of course shes a lustful blood sucking pervert psycho murderer with no real depth.

(btw you are more than welcome to both ignore this and LOVE toga I am not saying for you shes not worth the time or energy, this is just me reflecting on her and how hori has treated her, i appreciate and value fanon and the effort fans will put into loving her, thats so cool and based, im glad you can find joy in something like that, for people who like her- I wish she was cared for by her writer 💕)

Uh… what I see or believe isn’t fanon broski.

Look Horikoshi has always had a problem of pushing aside the women in his series, the worst of this case has ALWAYS been ochako. Do I think that’s because he wanted to write a gay love story? Yeah, I do. Does that make it okay? Absolutely not. I will be the first person to shout from the rooftops that horikoshi does not write women as well as he should. He has fan service abundant, he makes crude jokes using women that really aren’t all that funny, he’s pushed aside his women and their moments in order to forward bkdk’s development.

But you can absolutely not come into my ask to tell me that she is an, “underdeveloped wasted idea”. Because she’s just fucking not.

People think toga is just “the blood sucking bisexual who likes animals too”, but she’s just fucking not. That’s never been her defining trait or character.

Toga is a subversion of the yandere trope. That sadly means there will always be misogynistic rhetoric because that’s what the trope is. At least BEFORE the subversion happens, which is now! Where Ochako DOESNT FIND HER CREEPY!

She’s going to be creepy and weird and have issues because she’s a villain. She’s a queer villain. Her entire story is one that defies the tragedy of carmilla and refuses to let her identity be anything but “Himiko Toga”. She has always been a character about identity. She’s never been “possessive” or “jealous” over Izuku for this purpose. It’s the reason why she’s bisexual, why she just “has an attraction to blood”. It’s a queer story wrapped in metaphor and it always has been. Why is THIS monster/villain queer story any worse than, idfk, the joker and Batman. I haven’t found a single person able to genuinely voice that to me in a way that is convincing! Horror and unconventional ways of love and ESPECIALLY blood has always always ALWAYS been a part of queer coded stories for a LONG TIME. We are the unconventional. We always have been. And that’s not me “bending over backwards” HER PARENTS LITERALLY CALL HER A DEVIANT AND SHE ASKS WHY NO ONE ELSE STRUGGLES WITH THE URGES SHE DOES.

I’ve said this before, and I’ll fucking say it again, Toga is horikoshi’s most well written and thought out female character. Ochako got kicked over and over again, same with momo, Tsu, Mina, and whoever the fuck else.

And I’m sorry, but writing a queer villain inspired by the lesbian vampire trope isn’t homophobic or bad writing.

She’s HAD depth. Idk if you read her backstory or her feelings on Ochako, twice, hawks, or even Izuku but she’s HAD depth. And I’m tired of pretending she hasn’t.

Normally I wouldn’t engage with shit like this but you reached out to me DIRECTLY. So let me make this clear: you can have whatever opinions you want on toga, and I will not get angry or express anger in any sort of way. But this account? This is not your fucking space and I will ABSOLUTELY meme on you for it.

#togachako #got a little heated there silly me #togaocha #togaraka #sock rages #maybe that should be a new tag just for me

[achingly-tired]

Hey, this might be an unpopular opinion but… a person can be a fan of both Nancy Wheeler AND Steve Harrington. It doesn’t need to be an either/or situation. Maybe it’s just my feed and I need to diversify it, but I am seeing a lot of people be like “oh, Nancy Wheeler is the innocent one in all of this, Steve was the one who fucked up” OR “Steve Harrington is innocent one in all this, Nancy fucked up.” Like… no, friends. There’s some nuance.

First things first: Steve did some messed up shit season 1. There is no denying that. Did Jonathan take inappropriate photos without people’s consent? Yes. Did Steve need to break his camera? No. Did Steve need to call Nancy a whore on the sign? No. Did he need to say all that really toxic shit—especially about Will being queer??? Absolutely not!! But also.. after getting his ass handed to him by Jonathan, he kind of realized he fucked up and WENT TO APOLOGIZE. He just happened to accidentally stumble upon the Upside Down. And then he stuck around. AND AFTER THAT, NANCY MADE THE DECISION TO GET BACK TOGETHER WITH HIM. That’s not on Steve.

In season two, did Nancy and Steve both make mistakes? Yes. But it isn’t because either of them were ignoring each others traumas…it was because they were both dealing with trauma in different ways. For Steve, his coping mechanism was “it’s fine, I’m fine, everything’s fine. Nothing happened.” That’s an avoidance response, common in people with PTSD. For Nancy, the way she coped was she needed to get closure for Barb. She literally could not think about anything OTHER than Barb—everything was a trigger for her…yet another common PTSD response. Neither was more wrong or more right for how they responded. They just responded differently. Do I personally think it was fucked up of Nancy to get drunk and call Steve bullshit? Yes. But I also recognize that she was hurting, she had lowered inhibitions, and she is a traumatized teenager. Do I think Steve should have just… left her at the party, drunk and alone? No. But also his girlfriend of a year just told him she didn’t love him. And he was hurting, and a traumatized teenager. Do I think Nancy cheated on Steve? Yes. Do I think she’s a horrible person because of that? No. But she caused hurt—same as Steve. And honestly, I really wish the ST writers would have them have some sort of conversation about this all.

Now these are just the first two seasons—I have *thoughts* about the fourth (i.e., the writers really do be trying to ruin both Nancy and Steves character arcs). But my whole point is… I am so tired of seeing everyone choose one or the other. And act like there is no god damn nuance.

Personally, I love the idea of Ronance! Do I think Robin might be a little worried about it at first, especially as she and Steve probably had many a conversation about how he was really hurt? Yes. But do I think Steve would forbid her from dating Nancy?? Or being weird about it??? No! At least, in the world where the ST writers aren’t trying to force them together,

I also really love Steddie! I think the two boys balance each other out! Where Steve is quiet, Eddie is loud. Where Eddie is terrified, Steve is brave. They need each other. They work better with each other.

Ultimately, I don’t think Steve and Nancy were EVER right for each other. I think they wanted to be right for each other because that’s what they were told to do. But neither of them is a bad person—they’re just both nuanced, traumatized humans.

#steddie #steve harrington #nancy wheeler #ronance #robin buckley/nancy wheeler #steve harrington/eddie munson #stranger things #nuance exists #I promise #just ranting

[lesbiansanemi]

About

I'm Kaz! I'm a masc nonbinary ace (probably some flavor of aro) lesbian. They/he/she pronouns (in order of preference).

I'm 22. Please only follow if you're 18+. I will block if you are not.

I have comorbid ADHD and autism. I'm not good at conveying/picking up tone, just as a heads up. I can come across as overly aggressive sometimes because of it. Sorry in advance

Follows/replies from @yuribalisms

Mutuals can ask for my discord!

Primarily a fic writer, but meta and analysis is also common.

This is primarily an anime/manga blog, but other media may crop up from time to time

Primary fandoms: Kimetsu no Yaiba, Jujutsu Kaisen, Chainsaw Man, Bleach

Secondary fandoms: Puella Magi Madoka Magica, Dungeon Meshi, Trigun, Fullmetal Alchemist, One Piece, Mob Psycho 100, Doctor Who

I do not consider myself pro-ship or anti-ship. I think it's a reductive way of interacting with fiction and I will not engage with either side of that particular discourse.

Navigation

All original posts are tagged with #kaz rambles

All my fics are tagged with #my fics

All wlw art is tagged with #sapphic <3

Favorite art of attractive women is tagged with #not to be a lesbian but oh my fucking—

I tag all posts related to a fandom with that fandom. If it is something I blog about even semi-frequently, I also tag all characters and ships featured.

NOT SPOILER FREE! And I do not tag for spoilers

I do not have any triggers tagged. You can ask to have something tagged, but I cannot guarantee I will remember. However, I will not tag with blood or violence warnings, as these are things I post/reblog very frequently.

I don't reblog nsfw images often, but if I do, I try to remember to tag them as #nsft. Nsfw text is not tagged.

I am most definitely into blood/gore/cannibalism kink/fetish stuff. It crops up often here. Do with that info what you will.

Other

No DNI as I think they are functionally useless, but if you irritate me, or are a dick, I will block.

I block very liberally, so if you are/get blocked as a random fandom blog, sorry! It probably wasn't for anything that is a big deal. Especially if you frequently post in tags. I tend to block all x-reader blogs on sight

This blog is mostly anime/manga centric, but I also post/reblog a lot of feminism topics/discussions, as well as discussions of misogyny, transmisogyny, and lesbophobia. I’m esp tired of these issues getting ignored and perpetuated within queer spaces so a lot of discussions from that specific angle.

Most likely, I won't follow back. I almost exclusively follow sapphics and/or ppl who almost exclusively post about the same fandoms as me, and that is unlikely to change.

Ty for reading! Enjoy your scrolling!

#kaz rambles

[azulas-daddy-kink]

“wHy iS iT oKaY tO mAkE sTrAiGhT cHaRaCtErS gAy BuT i CaN’t MaKe GaY cHaRaCtErS sTrAiGhT?”

Okay, let’s unpack this...

First of all, Karen, these “straight” characters you speak of are often just assumed to be straight rather than canonically straight so jot that down. There are very few characters in any form of media who are explicitly stated to be heterosexual (cisgender, too, while we’re here!). We just assume everyone is cishet until proven otherwise because of heteronormativity and cisnormativity. 

Dating/marrying someone of the opposite sex doesn’t make one straight - that in and of itself is pretty meaningless. Bisexual people exist, hello! So do pansexual, omnisexual, and asexual people. Also comphet is a thing.

So, Karen, are fanfic writers and fandom really “turning straight characters gay”? Or are they merely taking characters that you are wrongfully assuming are cishet, and exploring possibilities beyond that? Furthermore, even if there character in question truly IS canonically straight and cisgender... so fucking what? “Heterophobia” is not a thing, sorry you all needed to make that up because you’re so bored with your own lame lives that you developed a persecution fetish on the basis of being straight and cisgender. My god, just how far is your head up your own ass?!

Now as far as canonically LGBT+ characters go, I can’t believe I’m really about to explain why it’s a problem or why it’s offensive to make them straight and cis but here I go....

Erasing queer people is a problem that has plagued our society since the dawn of time, number one. And we’re tired of it. We exist. We’re here, we’re queer, and we’re not going anywhere. And number two, you have a million and one characters to choose from if you want to write a straight relationship, seriously, why do you need to go after the handful of LGBT+ ones? Because your mommy never told you no growing up, and you can’t stand the thought that you can’t always do whatever you want with zero consequences???

“It’s a free country!”

Sure it is, Karen. Technically you are free to write whatever you want, and to think whatever you want. Just as we are free to criticize you, and we are free to call you out for being the bigot that you are (:

/end

#discourse #fanfic #fandom #lgbt #lgbt representation

[starsarefire824]

(Not directed at you, just venting)

The backflips people will do to be biphobic are astonishing. Like my siblings in christ, it doesn't matter if Mike is gay, bi, pan or some other version of queer - why are we tearing each other down? I'm bi myself and if Mike is bi, great, if he's not, also great. I literally couldn't care less but to be *-phobic* about it is just wild to me. Like y'all will do so much to deny the existence of bi people.

People need to go touch grass. 🙄

I totally agree with you. I sort of flop between my feelings on Mike’s sexuality depending on my vibe on a specific day. Sure, I like to write him as bi—but that usually is a choice I make because I see a lot of my teenage self in him so it’s easy to tap into—-and it allows for (in my personal opinion) some interesting dynamics to be built between multiple characters.

But that’s just it—-isn’t it??? It’s a headcanon. Any take on Mike’s sexuality other than being straight up until this point, as it is written by the Duffer Brothers, is that he is a straight boy dating El.

Any other variance of that is pure speculation/analysis/hopes for season 5. Season 4 gave us some hints, there has been subtle things in past seasons. There have been a lot of choices made by his character that didn’t make sense until post season 4. And it becomes way more complicated when really taking into account his actions towards Will. But either way, Mike has not come out. Mike has not stated with words how he feels/ given any indication of his sexuality. So therefore, any headcanon by a fan of Stranger Things is valid.

I actually like Mike as gay. I, as a bi person, would fucking love if he was gay. It would be perfectly legitimate by what we’ve been shown, and his relationship with El could be explained away perfectly if season five wraps it up in a well written ending.

But so can bi Mike. Bisexuality is also a valid conclusion for Mike. He won’t be lesser than or not queer enough if he ends up being bi.. He won’t love Will Byers any less if he is bi. He won’t be less sexually attracted to Will if he is bi. He won’t be less of a person if he happened to be in love El and Will at the same time in his life. Or god forbid, be sexually attracted to a female. He is still valid as a character if he is bisexual.

And no……he won’t be “better rep” if he is gay.

While I’m at it, even if Mike chose El in the end (which we won’t know until season 5 because we, in fact, are not in the writers’ room) while still harboring attraction and romantic feelings for men, doesn’t make him ANY LESS FUCKING BI. Or any less fucking QUEER. And im so tired of talking about it.

#mike wheeler #bi mike wheeler #gay mike wheeler #straight fucking mike wheeler #you valid baby no matter what #byler #stranger things #anon ask

[angrylesbianstereotype]

Not in spite of but because no one asked here’s my take on WaltJesse: The subtext is for sure there and yes I would have liked it to have been more textually explicit because we all know the writers wouldn’t have shied away from those implications if say, Jesse had been a woman. Also I’m tired of all queer or I guess, queer-adjacent, relationships in media being so sanitized and twee and devoid of conflict that doesn’t center around coming out bc mainstream media is only ever inclusive for ratings and bc straight audiences still view queer people and relationships as little more than fodder for inspiration porn (YES I know that our predecessors fought long and hard for ANY positive queer rep and that we weren’t there in the 2000s, but man wouldn’t it be nice to be written as People, with all the messiness and fucked-uppedness that comes with?) Also ngl yeah they had the most outrageously toxic codependent dynamic (I can’t tell anyone in my Clark Kent life ab my kingpin-sona so lemme just mold you my former student into my surrogate wifeson bc I look down on you so I can just treat you like shit whenever you fail to embody this persona) ever depicted in the whole history of visual media and I wouldn’t have minded if they held back on that even less bc I’m a messy bitch who lives for drama.

WITH ALL THAT SAID I would have rather the show had gone off-the-rails Alex Jones no homo than had these two end up together in the conclusion under any circumstances bc first of all be fucking fr and also it was literally an abusive relationship?? Jesse babylove you deserved so much better than having the youth and life leeched out of you by that decomposing old tool

#at the end of the day the most important thing is that no one asked #nothing brings out the gay and homophobic in me like this ship #waltjesse #jesse pinkman #walter white #breaking bad #brba