#i have personally experienced this./neg | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

the-npd-culture-is · 3 months

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NPD culture is telling yourself you don't care about how people view you but the moment you noticed someone blocked you, you think about it for the entire day

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loveromeo1641 · 13 days

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I recently reinstalled tiktok and GOD it was such a jumpscare remembering how god awful the tiktok tdlosk fandom was compared to tumblr. Like jesus christ why is everyone so negative and shitty all the fucking time, do they not get like exhausted from it

#“saiki is aro/ace so if you ship him with anyone youre a terrible awful person” have you ever experienced joy in your life #“*insert ship here* is such a terrible ship i dont know why anyone would like it” have you ever experienced happiness #anyway this post was prompt by me seeing someone complain about the saiki x satou ship saying its terrible and bad #like girl its not that serious #if you dont like it you can just scroll away?????#i seriously dont understand why people cant just live and let live #being negative all the time about fandom stuff is so fucking awful #it must be exhausting #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki no psi nan #im too lazy to tag

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starbuck · 1 year

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I remember back when The Mountain Goats No Children was a meme on here seeing a post that went “I hope you live, i hope we both live,” and it making me SO angry…

And this was before I had ever even listened to the song (or anything by TMG for that matter), but now, knowing that John wrote the song, and specifically the line “I hope you die, I hope we both die” in response to radio overplay of the sugary sweet I Hope You Dance, I feel even more vindicated, because like.

Yes. Ultimately my overall life philosophy is that I hope we all live… I would hope that goes without saying. But No Children isn’t a life philosophy. It’s about how sometimes everything sucks and you feel like shit and trapped and hopeless and angry and I HOPE YOU DIE, I HOPE WE BOTH DIE!!!!!!!!! And who can’t relate to that? Who has NEVER felt like that in their lives??????

I feel a little silly accusing what was ultimately just a joke meme post of Toxic Positivity, but that was the vibe I was getting from it, which is why it made me mad. As though it was sticking up its nose at a song it clearly had no understanding of and going “well I hope we both LIVE 😇😇” and like. Fuck you lol. It’s okay to feel negative emotions. It’s okay to be angry.

#tmg #the mountain goats #tagging bc i feel strongly about this lol… i’m sure i’m not the first to say this #but like. you know. if negative songs aren’t your thing then that’s cool - i respect that #but they still have a right to exist #it’s like people saying that stories with tragic endings shouldn’t exist… that non-hopeful stories should not exist #they can’t understand how people could get catharsis from that too #and it’s okay to not understand! there are plenty of things people enjoy that i’ll never understand #but that doesn’t mean they shouldn’t exist #or need to be sanitized #idk… my personal experience with No Children is that i avoided listening to it for the LONGEST time bc i thought it’d just be edgy bullshit #but then i FINALLY listened to it and i was like ‘oh yeah - i’ve been there’#and i’ve been a Mountain Goats fan ever since #bc i really respect and appreciate the way that John doesn’t see negative feelings as the antithesis to healing #there are a lot of artists out there who are like ‘yeah i made a lot of negative songs when i was in a bad place but now i’m getting better #so i’m gonna make happy peppy songs now!’ and like. hey - good for them! more power to them!#but i like the acknowledgment that experiencing those darker feelings doesn’t mean you’re a terrible person or backsliding #it’s okay to just *FEEL*#and it’s okay to sing ‘No Children’ at the top of your lungs in your house all alone #you might even feel BETTER afterwards!#don’t know until you try it!!

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tiger-balm · 23 days

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some people are soooo negative all the time like girl shut up !

#like maybe if you stepped away from your screen and experienced the real world you would realize nothing is that serious <3 #like at this risk of “toxic positivity” or whatever #i just personally i dont think yelling online about players or coaching or whatever is productive or healthy #the world isnt ending bc of one bad game from a team or from a player #and unless you work for the team it really doesnt impact your life at all lol #so why not just have fun when you can <3 #anyway whatever #sometimes i would just like to look at things for my teams without having to scroll through a million negative posts #talking to myself

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mariaiscrafting · 2 months

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Maybe Minecraft is itself a tree that's grown rotten. Or maybe I've simply outgrown it.

(I had a mental breakdown in the tags sorry)

#something something so much of my personal neg experiences w the internet have stemmed from minecraft #maybe its time for this blog to go #maybe i need to cut that game and all its brambly roots out of my life #all the content creators and youtube channels and servers #ive lost close friends. ive been personally betrayed. ive experienced direct racism and misogyny. all bc of this stupid game #and ofc theres all the unnecessary and secondhand hurt from content creators #shitty internet drama. addiction. shipping. fandom discourse. bullshit and more bullshit #all i experience w this game is loss #im being dramatic but i dont fucking care #i dont want to process how much ycgma or sbi meant to me #how much of my emotional healing and outpouring went into them #sleepy boys was my entire world at one point #now i have to rip it out of my psyche root and stem #invested so much time and energy and emotion and for what #personal #to delete #.txt

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monmuses · 2 months

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i was the anon that asked about the blacklist and its ridiculous people are so mad about it. You deserve to establish your boundaries and keep yourself safe

thanks for the explanation though. I dont really know Stols, just that i used to see them around in the community. I followed them for a short time on their Charlie blog and i never really saw them do anything they did on goetiia, just that they werent very active on that blog. there was a situation that someone copied all their tags because they posted comparisons screencaps of them but if i'm not mistaken they settled the conflict

as for ezy and sheep I wasn't aware of their drama but I saw the callouts and vents they'd post and I think ezy might still be around? like I said i don't know the whole situation but yeah

as for Stols i've been keeping up with the situation on the evidence blog and saw they posted a long apology and i dont know what to think. on one hand they seem serious and sincere but on another they might just be fooling everyone. it def isn't my business but would you think they deserve forgiveness if they returned one day? after seeing all the damage i just dont know and i'm curious about your own opinion

sorry for the long message, but again thanks for explaining everything. Im sorry people are rude and ridiculous when it comes to these things

hi again! i really do appreciate you asking because it should be encouraged to ask questions. even if you don't know where to go, it's always fair to ask someone who could answer your question if they talk about it.

but yeah, i've heard about it and i'm just hoping things settle after this. shit happened, people have moved on and i'm hoping that we don't have to deal with something as public as that was. as for the other two, i'm not sure. i don't keep track and if they're around, they're around. i always keep 'em blocked and its none of my business to see what they're up to.

and that's totally fair about asking on my opinion! i usually try to write out a very honest opinion with reasons behind it. while i don't necessarily hate people for their actions, i know they can grow and move from it. however long it takes, i think that should be an expectation if you WANT people to be better instead of repeating the same hateful spouts of reminders for what people did. people fuck up, and if they don't care to change, that's on them, though it shouldn't require an admittance of guilt or an apology every time people mention what they did.

for Stols' situation, i personally think it's all on how they change their ways to treat others and if it shows. that's it, really. not everyone will be easy to forgive them if they do return and IF there's changes. that's all on them if they do better, and i hope they do, but tumblr just isn't a safe place to unleash all of that unchecked negativity and behavior. i hope they get better and find the time to work their ways through their issues.

i appreciate you coming back! i hope my response sort of fitted what my view is on it, since im not one who dives into the drama/callout side of Tumblr. tho i hope it gave you some ideas on what to form for your own opinion!

#✨{𝔯𝔢𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔰𝔱 𝔯𝔢𝔠𝔢𝔦𝔳𝔢𝔡; (𝔞𝔰𝔨 𝔞𝔫𝔰𝔴𝔢𝔯𝔢𝔡)#✨{𝔲𝔫𝔦𝔡𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔦𝔣𝔦𝔢𝔡 𝔰𝔭𝔢𝔠𝔦𝔢𝔰; (𝔞𝔫𝔬𝔫𝔶𝔪𝔬𝔲𝔰)#✨{𝔬𝔲𝔱 𝔬𝔣 𝔪𝔞𝔫𝔤𝔞; (𝔬𝔲𝔱 𝔬𝔣 𝔠𝔥𝔞𝔯𝔞𝔠𝔱𝔢𝔯)#// *its not drama if you're talking about situations with names if you state whats HAPPENED and if its formal & respectful #// *i personally keep the details of what i experienced private but i summarize it to what happened in the end #// *and im picky with name-dropping specifically in a manner where its written to send hate and condone harassment for others #// *im only explaining what i know of and keeping it in a respectful manner rather than hateful. i might have a bitter view on things #// *but ill never share that on here. no one deserves to see MORE negative shit on tumblr #// *especially in the RPC #// *i appreciate the questions and thank you! im doing ok if ur wondering. shit just happens with anons fhjsjhfs #long post tw #long post #drama tw #name drop tw #drama mention #// *just gonna add these for safety

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sing-me-under · 2 months

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The reason I like the idea that Bruce was a teenage idle then personally experienced some aspect of poverty in his time abroad is because if I ever found out that some privileged rich white man spontaneously decided to go out into the streets and fight criminals hand to hand, I would personally tear his neck out with my teeth. Absolutely the fuck not. If he has no frame of reference for starvation, addiction, or homelessness, he has absolutely no right to enact his so-called justice.

That motherfucker better have fucking empathy in whole ass wheelbarrows OR ELSE.

#personal #dc #Batman #bruce wayne #like Oliver Queen getting trapped on an island and fending for himself #still not entirely sure how self-sustainability turned into anti-capitalism #but I’m down for it #I really need to read his comics #I’ve been passively absorbing information on the ArrowFam and it sounds very interesting #I need Bruce Wayne to smuggle himself on a freight ship into the USA #and being trapped in NYC without any form of legal identification or money #experiencing the failure of a system firsthand because he left Gotham too young to have established any emergency funds or prove his #only getting out because Zatara essentially kicked him out #he needs to be fucking humbled #before being allowed anywhere near the bat cowl #every time I see a fic that has Bruce be completely clueless to the plights of the lower class #I have this urge to shake him with my teeth like a dog #/neg #those Bruce Waynes can pass down the job to his kids and focus on getting his money to the right places and being a vocal social advocate #do what you do best #those specific Bruce Waynes can give up all their money and stop being billionaires #I will only accept Billionaire Bruce Wayne when he invests in the community and unintentionally becomes more influential and beloved #than the government #That Bruce Wayne who has done all he can and can still do more

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barkingangelbaby · 3 months

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I feel like such a broken fucking person lol

I talked way too much in the tags don't read them

#fighting off the ideation like my life depends on it!! bc it does!!!#been good about not thinking certain phrases but F U C K am i feeling it. i want to turn into a pile of dust #i am so desperately trying to work on myself and change my patterns and bad habits and perspective but it feels like i always fall short #i try not to talk about it online but I'm just. having a very hard day with N because we experience our feelings in different ways #i isolate myself bc i struggle with regulating my reactions and tones when im having an episode but she needs me to talk through things and #i sometimes just. can't. bc I'm not done experiencing the negativity and am not in a place to have a productive convo bc shame spirals etc #we just spent a long time talking and being patient and i thought i was understanding and explaining myself well but i just. idk.#i don't know how to explain that of course i love her even if I'm isolating myself. of course i love her although I'm nonverbal today. i jus #t can't *make* myself talk when I'm like this i don't want to be nonverbal i don't want to isolate i don't want to be a distant partner i do #n't want to fall back into these patterns related to my grief i want to be better i am trying to be better i am working so fucking hard on #being better. i just feel so defeated bc this all spiraled from me not wanting to decide what to get for lunch n using a poor tone about it #I'm about to talk with her some more but I just. kinda don't want to exist right now. fuck dude. it feels so fucking awful when i upset her #like i love her so much she is so important to me and it breaks my heart that our entire day is shot bc i was tired and cranky #i just don't understand how that equates to me not loving her bc she is my whole world dude. I'm going to throw up #i also don't know how to explain to her that scrolling on tumblr is comfortable to me I'm not ignoring her it's just the SM that i scroll on #like we're hanging out watching tv together I'm gonna scroll a little bit. it's just not insta or anything #idk my mind is scrambled I'm crying I just want to be a better person who can calmly communicate my thoughts and emotions #today has just beat my fucking ass dude. i isolate so those feelings don't get translated into my interactions with others #i don't even know what i typed in these tags I just don't want to off myself or think about it I'm fighting myself so much 2day #rAMbles

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girlvinland · 8 months

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This is a post I don't really feel good about writing, but at the same time, it's something I feel like I keep wanting to vent about and that I don't really...have enough places to vent about. I have my therapist, but I feel like even then, I can't unload it all on her bc I feel like I never have enough time even if it comes up here and there. Unloading it on other people who aren't her typically leads to them going on the defensive about the things I want to talk about, even when I try to be gentle or more objective in discussing it. I feel like here is one of the places I usually feel okay talking (even though I know that's probably stupid in some ways), but idk. It's comfortable because it's familiar and bc my words aren’t being directed at any one person. Sorry this is really long, btw.

I feel like I've talked about sexuality so much the past year or so, and I feel like I've taken so long, like...longer than a lot of people...to fully unravel things about myself. My teens were reserved for me barely scratching the surface of anything bc I was petrified of it and had zero exposure to anything that would have helped me in any way. My twenties were like, the first stage of my actual exploration and unfurling, where I was like...wait...this is a viable option? Other people are like this...I'm meeting people who understand. Does that mean I could let myself have that option too? But I still went on like no...no. I'm basically meant to live someone else's life and not seek out any further answers. The past five years I did seek out more answers and really did a lot of work, and that's like...still quite a long time to sort through some of this (or at least, it feels that way).

All of that is just history now though, so it’s not actually what I want to discuss. The thing that I don't feel good about is how my emotions have felt wrt everything currently. I've started to feel like such a bitter person for it, but I don't know if, in some way, the things I feel are justified after years of trying to understand my relationship to the world at large and how my sexuality relates to it. I want to believe that they are and that I'm just at a stage where I can experience these emotions fully in ways I haven’t before and that eventually they'll start to mellow out.

For instance, the past couple of years I've started to become somewhat like…irrationally irritated when it comes to hearing about boyfriends/husbands/etc of my friends who are cis women. Sometimes in general, but mostly when it's in the context of someone complaining about their partner in a day-to-day sort of way. The normalization of that in a heteronormative society has started to become something I just…really dislike hearing about. After going through my own “straight-passing” relationships (idk if this term is ok to use and I’ll change it if not), I almost feel like I just don't have the time or care for it anymore, even when I want to be supportive. Also, it’s hard for me to not apply my own experiences and biases, and a part of me always ends up wanting to be like. If you aren't happy, please try and do something to fix it. Converse with your partner about it. Leave if it's bad enough that you can't deal with it anymore. Get a therapist for yourself or both of you to work things out. Idk. It feels unfair for me to be like that when family or friends want to vent, but I also find it so hard to deal with now or like, it sends my brain to the boomer comic “I hate my wife but I’m just going to complain and not doing anything to change it” realm (and I understand that a lot of times, it is the partner who has little interest in changing things even when the other person is trying, which is even more frustrating to some extent).

The other thing I feel guilty about is this disdain I've developed of hearing about cis male celebrities/characters/crushes in more heterosexual regards (I want to specify that this doesn’t mean I actively dislike the celebs or characters or anything like that, not usually anyway. There are a ton of male chars I enjoy and everything, and tbh idc that much about celebrities in general). I feel like for the past few years I've been going through a period where I'm so tired of being exposed to it though (even with my own chars being sexualized by other ppl tbh) and all I want to do is to engage in media/culture that somehow dismantles anything cisheteronormative or that focuses on couples that aren’t cis/straight (I’ve esp sought out so much more wlw-adjacent media in recent years bc I’ve found myself connecting to it in a way that’s like…holy shit I want to make up for years of things I didn’t have access to or didn’t know existed).

Unfortunately, sometimes I feel like talking about that more often leads to a level of anger or annoyance on the part of people who don't feel that way, even though there is so much less media and discussion about those things in general. A lot of this is more relevant to irl straight friends I have and stuff, where it's fine for them to talk about all of the things they like when it relates to men or romance centered around men, but I don't necessarily have the same ability/level of acceptance from them to discuss media focused on anything else wrt romance/sexuality. Don't get me wrong, I have a lot of queer friends and whatnot, but most of them live elsewhere now (I also live elsewhere from many of them) and in general, the majority of people I'm exposed to in regular life are usually straight bc statistically that's just how it is and everything. It frustrates me though how it feels so acceptable for them to talk about whatever male celebrity/char or straight romance thing is popular, but I just kind of have to stand there and nod while wishing I could talk about the stuff I like too when it comes to like, wlw/lesbian media or whatever. That sounds selfish, but I feel like it reflects society’s general view on anything queer, and I think that’s why it gets to me more. Like maybe it wouldn’t bother me so much if that wasn’t the default/if I could speak about things as freely too. I know a lot of people feel that way, I don’t mean to make that or any of this post sound like some experience that is unique to me.

Anyway. I'm sorry if this vent comes off as weird or abrasive at all. It's really, really not my intention, nor is it directed at any one person or relationship and is more just a reflection on how my emotions are now when I think about cisheternormative society and that kind of thing. In the past I was able to kind of...blind myself to a lot of it, I think, or at least be more jokey about it in the times when it did annoy me. And after the years of working to distance myself from it, these aspects of it have started to seem really pervasive, even more so than I felt they were before. Like I said, I don't feel good about feeling these things and I don't want to always feel them. I hope I can work through them and get to a place where they don't bother me, or at least, not as much as now. I truly think it's a situation of like…breaking free of my own binds/feeling this freedom now and seeing things in a different light than I was able to before when I had the blinders on, and maybe once I settle into myself more, I’ll be able to shake those emotions off or find better ways to cope with them. I feel like a lot of this is stuff that’s always existed and always will, and the ways in which society operates are very hard to change, but I can kind of adapt the way I see and experience things so that they’re healthier for me. I’m just. Still in the early stages of doing that, and maybe it will take a little time to understand how to make it more productive/easier for myself. I didn’t get to this place overnight, and I’m sure I have a lot more to learn on this particular journey.

#by bug #sexuality #this is a long vent so im sorry about that if you read it #idk I don’t want this to feel personal to anyone bc it truly isn’t #it’s more just me reflecting in a space I feel ok doing that #and I promise it’s primarily about society and sexuality as a whole instead of people as individuals #even though I mention irl friendships I don’t want these things to reflect negatively on them #they just like what they like and that’s okay #this is more just me trying to gauge where I’m at with my emotions and somehow writing them out makes that easier #it’s also. im not happy with myself for experiencing these emotions but I want to change how I react to them when having them

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touchlikethesun · 23 days

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despite the current state of things, good things have in fact happened. if they’ve happened in the past, they can and they will happen again.

#today has been rough #really rough #but good things have happened #and i really need to focus on the good things and the joy i’ve experienced #and not let myself get bogged down in all of these negative thoughts #i was reading a fic where two characters had their first kiss #and bc of my mental state i was immediately like well doesn’t it fucking suck that my first kiss was ruined #bc the guy it was with was horrible to me after #except that’s not true!!!!!! that’s not true!!!!! it’s not and i can’t let myself think like that #i had an incredible first kiss #it doesn’t matter what happened after it was a good thing #and i do that all the time like i can’t ever let myself acknowledge the good things bc idk ig i think somehow it might invalidate the bad #and that’s a horrible habit #anyways maybe the tags should be on priv but i do think if i needed the reminder maybe other people do too #reminders #personal

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orcelito · 27 days

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Having lost my cat, my uncle, my great grandmother, my grandma's best friend (& one of the people who helped raise me), AND my dad all within the span of 9 months,

I have little sympathy for people who use deaths as an excuse to be an asshole. I get it, it sucks. Get the fuck over it. Your grief is not an excuse to treat others like shit. What the fuck.

#speculation nation #this isnt anything personal. im just reacting to a post that kind of pissed me off.#to be fair i was never close with my great grandmother so im not particularly broken up about that one #but it's still yet another death in the family within such a short period of time.#my cat is on this list bc he was the first one and it majorly fucked me up. so yeah it deserves to be here.#the others. well. my grandma's best friend makes me sad but at least she was getting up in years #my uncle and dad though. especially my dad. yea those have fucked me up the most.#im never gonna be the same after experiencing all of this in such short succession.#it sucks in a major way. and things are still continuously tumultuous.#but you dont see me lording it over people and using it as an excuse to be an asshole.#maybe i make people uncomfortable with how casually i mention it. but like whatever. it's simply my truth.#that's still just like. me just talking about what ive been up to. that kind of thing.#idk acting like someone needs to be treated with the most tender of touches after experiencing a major death #to the point where you cant even tell them when theyre being a manipulative little asshole?#i dont fucking think so!#yeah okay all grief hits different but ive pulled myself up by the bootstraps and kept my head on straight #even after i experienced death after death after death after death after Fucking Death #whats your excuse? youre Sad? we all fucking are. thats just life.#it's horrible and awful and it sucks that we have to live with this but you CANT let that affect how you treat other people!!!!!#and here i am making my own post venting about it instead of replying to the aita post that sparked this #bc the person the post was about just made me so angry to hear about.#but i am... a reasonable adult who separates themselves from situations before reacting in anger...#and so im making a tumblr post to get the emotions out instead of getting emotional at random strangers lol #anyways i actually had a pretty good day today. but in the way of grief. the smallest things can trigger moods sometimes.#but i am letting the emotions flow... here they are... i have expressed them... and i shall now release them... amen...#negative/#i guess lol. i sure did rant enough for it.

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youreaclownnow · 2 months

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Okay so something dawned on me tonight. I've really been pondering ep 49 and now that I've calmed down from my initial state of being very upset (because I got triggered by it lmfao) I've come to realize. It's literally just pretty wrapping paper on what's really a tragic ending. It's literally like any other gundam in the sense of, at its core, it's a story about the trauma we face and cycles of violence. I feel like I was lied to by the Fandom and went into it expecting a truly happy or at bare minimum HOPEFUL ending. Boy was I wrong. I didn't pinpoint why the first time and assumed it was just the me not liking rain. But this time I've come to realize exactly why it gets me feeling the way it does. The fact that the last shot is an announcement for the 14th gundam fight is really like... something. It's so blatant that it went right over my head. Everyone has suffered SO MUCH all for the cycle to repeat once more. I hate watching the episode but I can't deny, it ultimately IS fitting.

#watching my fave die in an attempt to put an end to it 4 eps prior only to have everyone act like everything is peachy #when in reality.......#its harsh and it feels genuinely painful to me #i still think allenby shouldve been endgame for domon simply bc id at least be able to say hes with someone who would treat him right #but thats not what happened.#i think its really like a personal issue as to why it hits so hard in a negative way to me and that is #when i got with my ex and moved out i thought id leave trauma in the past only to end up experiencing the worst 5 years of my life #and uh domon spends the whole series going through trauma only for the ending to be what it was and so ig im kinda like #ah its like my life path but grander scale and a potentially worse outcome #genuinely its just really depressing imo

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swinging-stars-from-satellites · 10 months

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there's nothing like being in love to make you aware of all your little insecurities

#I don't wear makeup. I don't have many life goals. I'm still job hunting. etc #it just feels like I'm the last girl he'd ever really look twice at #which is SUUUUCH a dumb juvenile thing to say but ugfhsjgnskgn just this once I want to be wanted #which really isn't smth I've experienced before #Lu rambles #EDIT: it's also probably a very unkind thing to say in the vein of that one post about how assuming other people #see us negatively just isn't good for anyone #i do know this guy to be a really kind person and genuine in his faith so I probably should just chill skdjdksnf

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grimdot · 6 months

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x,