#i feel so disconnected from my sisters that i was super close with | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

superdanverstrio · 1 year

Text

Kidnapped PT.1

Masterlist

PT.2 PT.3 PT.4 PT.5 PT.6 PT.7

Summary: Baby Danvers Get kidnapped and it’s up to Kara and Alex to do everything in their power to save them.

Warnings: Torture, kidnapping, graphic description of injuries.

A/N: this is probably gonna become a supergirl x marvel crossover.

At first when you opened your eyes you thought you want blind, because the room you were in was pitch black. You blinked some more, and you think you can see something not too far from you, you think it's a table with a computer on it, but you're not sure. You tried to get up, but quickly noticed that your wrist and ankles were tied to the chair you were sitting in. Not only that, but you tried to wiggle out of the restraint, but it only manages to dig into your skin. Instead of trying again, you tried to remember how you got here in the first place.

The last thing you remember was walking to Kara's apartment, you were supposed to meat both your sisters there to hang out. All of a sudden someone grabbed you from behind, you tried you fight back but the person grabbing you seemed to be 10x bigger and stronger than you. You screamed, hoping that maybe Kara or someone walking by would hear you. You screamed and trashed around until something pricked your neck, you tensed up, and then you felt your body relaxing on its own, your eyes felt too heavy to keep them open, and you could no longer scream for help. The last thing you remember was the voice of and men, then nothing.

The sound of a door opening and closing brought you back to the present, you watch as a tall scary creature step in the room, it was at least 6 foot 5 with yellow pupil and super long claws.

“Y/N Danvers?” the alien said. You don't answer him, instead you ask him a question," Who are you and what I'm I doing here.” The light suddenly turns on, blinding you for a short moment. “ I will be asking the questions, but since I'm feeling nice, ill answer those 2.” He slowly walked toward you, stopping a few feet in front of you, he crouched down to be at eye level. “ My name is Vexok, and you are here because of your sister.” Immediately you thought it was another alien seeking revenge for what Kara's mother did, so it was a shock when you did say Kara's name. “ Your sister… Alex, I think it is-.” “How do you know my sister!” You said, trying to sound more confident than you feel. “You never forget the name of the person that kill your brother.” You stayed silent, there was no way Alex would do something like that unless she absolutely needs to.

“So it's only fare if I kill you for revenge.” He said smirking, he got up and walk to the other side of the room and turn the camera on. “ Now smile for the camera.” Vexok said, walking back toward you.

An hour earlier at Kara's Apartment.

Alex and Kara were seated on the couch waiting for you. When after 30 minutes you didn't show up Alex decided to Call you, when you didn't answer after a few ring Alex hanged up. “Where could they be?” Kara wondered.” Maybe they're just late.” Alex answered. “Super hearing?” Alex asked her sister. Kara focused on her hearing for a few seconds, Alex say frown on her sister's face. “ What's wrong?” “I can't… Hear their heartbeat.” Kara said worried. “ We should go to the D.E.O.”

When they arrived at the D.E.O they approach brainy's work desk. “Brainy.” Alex demanded. “Yes director Danvers?” Brainy said, turning in his chair. “Supergirl.” He greats with a nod of his head. “Brainy, would you be able to track someone's phone for us?” Alex asks. “Of course who's phone would you like me to track.” “ Our sibling's phone, we haven't seen them in a while and their heartbeat as gone silent.” Kara explained.

In less than a minute, brainy found it. “Got it.” “Really where?” Alex demanded. “In an allay way near your apartment.” Brainy said, pointing at Kara. “OK let's go.” Alex said, in a hurry to find you. “The thing is, Miss Danvers that it was an hour ago and the phone as been disconnected since.” Brainy said before they left. Just then Alex got a message on her phone, she check to see who it was, but she didn't recognize the number, so she decided to check it later your safety was more important right now.

#kara danvers #supergirl fanfiction #supergirl #supergirl reader insert #bb danvers #y/n danvers #alex danvers #alex danvers x reader #bd #reader insert #brainy #kidnap tw #torture tw #marvel x supergirl #marvel

114 notes · View notes

trappedwriter · 1 year

Text

Chapter 26

Content Warning, this is intended for people that are 18+ and this chapter includes ddlg themes (always forced age regression) abdl themes, little violence, loads of fluff, some swearing. If I left anything out, let me know.

A/N: Apologises for not writing anything in ages. I’ve been really sick for the past couple of months and only now starting to get some answers. I’m going to try and get new chapters up every Sunday. I hope you like this chapter. As always comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated. If you would like to support me further, my kofi is linked in my bio. Much love, J x

Jessica’s POV

Daddy eventually came into my room. He bent down and looked at me sternly. “Pumpkin, do you have anything to say to me?” He asked. There wasn’t any annoyance in his tone. I sheepishly looked up at him from the floor. My eyes couldn’t meet his. “I’m sorry for kicking you.” I said quietly. He sat down in front of me and took my hands in his. “Why did you do it? You knew it would hurt me. I know you were upset about the sandcastle but there was no need to attack her. We could have just rebuilt it. It’s no big deal.” No big deal? How could he think that. I started to get upset again. “I… I was upset. That was our sandcastle. She had her fun with Dada. This was our special moment and she ruined it.” I looked up, finally catching his eyes in mine. I single tear drop fell, it trickled down my face but before it reached my chin, he wiped it away with his thumb. He took my face in his hands and kissed my forehead. It was a soft, understanding and forgiving kiss. I sat up on my knees and crawled over to his lap. I sat in between his legs and gave him the biggest hug I could possibly give. He let out a little chuckle and returned the gesture.

Still cradled in his arms, he moved his hand in big slow circles rubbing my back “Honey, you know you gotta go and apologise to Bunny.” I nodded into his chest, just a slight movement, that he wouldn’t have noticed if my head wasn’t pressed against him. His big hands moved from my back and under my arms, lifting me up and placing my feet firmly on the ground. I took his hand and followed him into the living room where dada and Bunny were playing with my dollies. Anger started to bubble up from my tummy, but I didn’t let my feelings show. I had to fool them all. I let my hand fall to my side as Daddy cleared his throat “I think a little someone has something to say, don’t you baby?”

Fidgeting with my hands and twisting my feet I let out a little “Sorry.” Daddy bent down and placed a hand on my back “A little louder pumpkin.” Mentally sighing, I should have known that wouldn’t have been good enough. I knew I had to convince them that I actually mean it, but that bitch wasn’t getting a true sincere apology. I looked up with watery eyes, made direct eye contact with Bunny and put on my best performance. “I sorry Bunny.” I ran over and gave her a tight hug “I sorry for hurting you, I didn’t mean it, I super sorry.” A collection of awes filled the silence. Both daddies came over and embraced us adding to this “special” moment.

It was dada that disconnected first “wasn’t that so sweet of Jessica, Bunny? She’s such a good sister.” She looked up at him and then back to me “Yes daddy.” I gently held Bunny’s hand and swung her arm as I rocked on my heels. “Um can we… can we play in my nursery, please?” Daddy looked at dada nervously, but dada gave him a reassuring little nod “Sure princess. We’ll call you when dinner is ready.” Said daddy. I squealed in glee. Despite the height difference I dragged Bunny down the hall and into my room. I turned around and gently pushed the door closed. I stood there, hands pressed on the door contemplating my next move.

The moment was brief and silent but then Bunny broke the silence “Psst… hey we got to talk quietly, they’re gonna be watching us.” I turned around to face her but said nothing. She continued “I don’t know what they did to you but we gotta get out of here, what do you say we work together?” Her expression and tone was hopeful, sadly for her she got stuck with me. Loudly I hopped over to her “So what ya wanna play? I have lots of toys here, we could play with my dollies, build big castles or…” I put my hand up to my chin and made a thinking face. I gasped “We can play hide and seek.” Her face crinkled in annoyance “Hide and seek in here? It’s tiny.” My eyes lit up and face beamed “Yay! Ok you count and I’ll hide. No peaking.” I giggled. Bunny let out an annoyed sigh “Fine, one… two.” I looked around the room, there really wasn’t anywhere to hide. The closet would be the only option but at the corner of my eye I spotted the perfect place. I tiptoed and hid waiting to be found.

Chris’s POV

As soon as they left our sight, Sebastian pulled out his phone and brought up the cameras in the nursery. Everything seemed normal. Bunny was standing near the crib, she said something to Jessica we couldn’t hear. Jessica on the other hand, loud and excited was easy to hear when she asked what Bunny wanted to play. She’s so cute. I looked at Sebastian’s face and saw a grin form when Jessica suggested hide and seek that was just like my own. There wasn’t much room in the nursery for the game, but she was so happy when Bunny agreed and that was all that mattered. We watched as Bunny started to count and Jessica looked around the room for somewhere to hide.

She decided on hiding behind the massive teddy bear that Sebastian deemed necessary for a little girls room. He said it was the perfect place for cuddles and story time. We watched and waited for bunny to find her, however we never saw it happen. As soon as Bunny got to 15, Jessica emerged from her hiding spot, well not really emerged. The bear started to move, it’s arms were held up and it’s fat body sloshed from side to side as little feet moved it closer to Bunny. Bunny kept counting her eyes still closed as the bear got closer. At this point we had to go check on them. Something didn’t seem right. We burst into the room just as Jessica was about to plop the bear right on top of Bunny.

“Jessica! What are you doing?” I said I was angry, and I heard it in my own voice as I spoke. She gently dropped the bear to the side “Aww dada you ruined my surprise. I was just gonna surprise Bunny with Mr bear near her when she got to the big number. She would’ve been so shocked when she opened her eyes and Mr Bear was right beside her. She was suppose to find me.” Sebastian burst out laughing, he walked over to Jessica and ruffled her hair. “You silly little goose. That would have been really funny to see. My little prankster.” He picked her and placed her on his hip. I went over to Bunny and repeated the action. Seeing the funny side of this, I too let out a laugh “Mr bear was gonna scare you Bunny, that’s a funny bear, isn’t it?” Bunny just looked absolutely confused about the whole situation and gently nodded, not knowing what else to do or say. “Right how about we watch a movie instead?” Sebastian said, “Can Mr bear comes too?” Jessica asked, “Sure thing baby.” With that we made our way back to the living room to watch another Disney movie.

Bunny’s POV

As we left the nursery, the only thought that passed through my mind was “What the fuck just happened?”

Chapter 27

58 notes · View notes

moviemunchies · 8 months

Text

Alright! Finally something that isn’t The Fast and the Furious!

Back to superhero films.

Jaime Reyes came back from college graduation to find his family is broke and is about to be evicted by the corrupt Kord Industries. He and his sister Milagro pick up minimum wage jobs, which they quickly lose; but not before Jaime leaves a good impression on heiress Jenny Kord, daughter of disappeared tech billionaire Ted Kord. She offers a meetup for a job at the family company (which is now run by her aunt, Ted’s sister, Victoria Kord, who has turned into a militarized and corrupt corporation), but when Jaime finds her, she’s just taken something out of the lab and asks him to hide it.

Of course, Jaime opens the box (at his family’s urging), and it turns out to be the Scarab, which quickly activates and fuses to his spine, creating an alien super suit. However! Victoria Kord will stop at nothing to get that Scarab, as she plans to use it to help her super cybernetic soldier program. Now Jaime and his family will have to figure out how the Scarab works, how to disconnect it, and most importantly, how to survive.

This film was originally produced to be released only on HBO Max, but with the shake ups at Warner/DC/Discovery/HBO, it was shifted to a theatrical release. Perhaps this was to try to avoid the backlash that came from canceling Batgirl? I don’t know. It’s not expected to do well financially, and thus far, it really hasn’t, though I’ve seen good reviews. But I have a soft spot for Jaime Reyes, so I wanted to give this movie a go.

Admittedly, this movie feels a lot like a made-for-TV movie, just with a much higher budget. The main criticism that’s come up in reviews is that this movie is a stereotypical superhero origin story. And that’s true! In terms of actual Plot, there’s not much that makes this different from a dozen other superhero stories that you’ve seen before. When this was an HBO Max original, that is a lot less egregious, but as a theatrical release it’s a little frustrating. The difference (and one that most reviews also bring up) is that this is a Hispanic superhero, and the movie’s emphasis on his identity is a highlight that makes this movie memorable.

How many Hispanic superheroes have been shown in live-action theatrical films? Not a lot! And certainly not that many that shine so brightly on issues that Hispanic people face today–gentrification, not being taken seriously, and being constantly stereotyped. These are things that theatrical superhero movies rarely touch on, and I can’t think of any that make it a thematic focal point.

And it’s not just doom-and-gloom! There are a bunch of really fun shout-outs to Hispanic pop culture that stick out to people in the know–from Selena music to Hispanic superhero media. There’s a few references to El Chapulín Colorado, and while some people laughed because it was silly, at least one person in my theater was guffawing because he definitely got the reference.

A quibble, though, but a big one: the whole thing about the Reyes family is that they’re all so together and strong because of it. They’re a loving family. And yet all of the family’s struggles are news to Jaime when he arrives back home–the family business closing, the upcoming eviction, his father’s health problems: he didn’t know about any of them! If Jaime having been distant from his family and having to repair his relationship was his character arc for the movie, then yeah, it works. But it isn’t–that he’s completely blind to their problems is a non-issue in the long run, and it feels wrong with how important family is to the story’s themes.

The worldbuilding reminds me a little of Black Adam in that this is a world with history, especially with superheroes. Jaime’s uncle is a fan of the Blue Beetle, and brings up Superman. While the reaction to the Scarab’s extraterrestrial nature is alarm and surprise, no one expresses disbelief. In a world with superheroes, these things are apparently not too unbelievable.

The Scarab feels a bit weird to me. I guess this is in part because my exposure to Jaime Reyes is Young Justice, in which the Scarab has a specific, robotic personality that’s hyper violent and has to be reigned in. The Scarab also turns out to be an agent of the Reach, an alien nation bent on galactic conquest. The Scarab of the movie ends up bonding with Jaime and connecting to his brain, and so some of its dialogue at the end uses Spanish and slang, which felt jarring to me. Maybe that makes sense for the character in the movie–they’re mentally bonded, after all. But it just seems weird to me from my experiences with the character.

The villains are… functional, I guess? Victoria Kord is a bit over-the-top, but given the world right now, a villain running a technology corporation maybe should be over-the-top. That’s kind of how life is sometimes with these people–as is their disdain for those not useful to her. Carapax is a bit more, though I think the movie waits too long to give him his much-needed depth. If we got stronger hints of that earlier, I’d have appreciated it more.

There is an odd bit with the soundtrack that stuck out to me. It's fine, mostly, but the part where Jaime fully bonds with the Scarab has swelling, heroic music playing. What makes it strange is that this is also while Carapax is getting his full powers, and we're shown him powering up at the same time, and the music continues its heroic tones.

It's just a weird juxtaposition, with the music going the way it does.

Overall, it’s a fun movie, though it’s not hitting too many unfamiliar beats. The main draw here is how unapologetically Hispanic the movie is. But after years of continuity-heavy superhero films, and several attempts to tell stories about the multiverse, a back-to-basics approach to a superhero movie is appreciated. I liked it. It isn’t blowing my mind, but it’s a good movie to watch if you’ve got the time.

#Blue Beetle #Movie Munchies #Jaime Reyes #reviews #DC

18 notes · View notes

foggyfanfic · 5 months

Text

Mirabel's Super Secret Adventure

Chapter Preview: Eventually, the quiet was broken by the crunch of pebbles beneath slowly moving feet. Mirabel gulped and squeezed her eyes shut, hoping it was one of her parents, sisters, or older cousins.

Tío Bruno turned and his arm tightened around her by the tiniest fraction. She stifled a groan and opened her mouth to apologize.

Prologue Prev Next Masterlist

12. By the River

Mirabel didn’t make it past the backyard.

“Whoa, hey, hey, kid, where you going?” Tío Bruno appeared seemingly out of nowhere to block her path, holding up his hands.

“I- I-, Away. I messed up, Tío Bruno, I ruined everything,” Mirabel struggled to get the words out, her voice sounded small and miserable.

“No you didn’t. A-and even if you had. So what? You’re just going to leave?”

“Sí,” she dodged around him and started running towards the divide. At first she didn’t think Tío Bruno was going to follow, she could faintly hear him saying something to someone behind her, then he caught up with her.

He jogged beside her, and didn’t say anything, he just stayed with her. Before long, she was feeling winded, so she slowed back down to a walk. Tío Bruno slowed down as well.

He wasn’t even close to winded.

She knew he ran recreationally, and had been doing so for years, but come on. He was fifty!

As they reached the break in the mountains, Mirabel expected him to try and stop her again, but he didn’t. He just walked with her until they were out of the valley, standing in front of a river.

Finally, Tío Bruno asked, “Now what?”

Mirabel blew out a long breath and all but collapsed onto the nearest rock, “I don’t know.”

He sighed and sat with her, “W-would it be alright if I hugged you? Would that be ok?”

Mirabel blinked back tears, then nodded. Soon, Tío Bruno had wrapped an arm around her, and pulled her into his side. She sniffled, and leaned on him.

“You guessed wrong,” she mumbled, after a while.

“What’s that?”

“You guessed wrong,” she repeated, louder and clearer, “I wasn’t in that vision because I was going to fix things, I was in it b-because I’m the one that ruined everything.”

“Now hold on-.”

“No, it’s true. I-I figured out it was Abuela. Abuela was the one that felt disconnected,” Mirabel said, “she was in pain, wasn’t she? She, I don’t know, m-maybe the pressure of being the village leader was getting to her? She was the only one left to be hurting and instead of helping her I-I-.”

“You pointed out that she acts like our gifts are more important than our family,” Tío Bruno finished, “yeah, I heard. I also heard you stick up for me. That’s-, gracias, for that. U-usually the only one who does things l-like that is Leandra. O-or my sisters, but it usually doesn’t work as much when they do it. They- it sort of makes them feel- they give up sometimes.”

Mirabel sniffled again, but didn’t say anything.

“Let’s be honest here kid, it uh, you weren’t wrong,” Tío Bruno said, sounding as tired as his eye bags always made him look, “well! You were a little wrong. She does love us, it’s just… You remember what I said about me freaking out after marrying Leandra? How I was trying to earn love I already had?”

“Sí?”

“Mamá has been doing the same thing,” he looked out at the river and thought for a beat, then continued, “I’ve seen what’s out there, a-and I understand why she’s so afraid of losing the miracle. I think that may have been-. Abuela has been getting-. I should have said something. I-I saw the effect Abuela was having on everybody, the way the pressure was hurting us, but I just-. I didn’t realize how bad it was until I heard you yelling at her.”

He shrugged, jostling her. She could sense he had more to say, so she waited.

“I’ve spent so long trying to quietly patch the cracks, it wasn’t until you stood up to her that it even occurred to me they were coming from our foundation,” he shook his head, “I don’t know where I thought-. I really did believe the cracks were from somebody else. It just never occurred to me that she could even-.”

“She always seemed invincible,” Mirabel muttered, “no matter what was happening, it never seemed like-. If we hadn’t already eliminated everyone else it never would have occurred to me to check on her.”

Tío Bruno nodded, “Sí. I always knew she was afraid of losing the miracle, but I never thought that fear could hurt her, or us, this much.”

“A-and I just made it worse,” Mirabel felt her voice crack, tears spilled out of her and she had to take long, even breaths to keep herself from sobbing. And even those breaths kept hitching and wobbling.

Tío Bruno twisted on the rock so he could hold her with both arms, gently, he rubbed her back and let her cry on him.

“Somebody had to tell her she was hurting people, or it wouldn’t have mattered what we did, the cracks would have come back,” Tío Bruno whispered, “and all us adults failed to speak up when we had the chance. That’s why you were in that vision mija, because you were always going to be the one to expose the cracks that have been there all along. You didn’t ruin anything Mirabel.”

A few heartfelt sobs broke free and she waited until she had them back under control to say, “Stop being so nice to me. I destroyed our house.”

“Meh, the house was coming down with or without you,” he said, voice casual, “you just made it happen a little faster.”

Mirabel laughed a little, then cried a lot more. Eventually, she sighed and just leaned on her Tío. He pressed a kiss into her hair, then slowly loosened his hold so they were once again side by side, facing the river.

They sat for what must have been a millennium, Tío Bruno didn’t say anything else. He held her and let her work through her thoughts.

“I owe Abuela an apology,” Mirabel muttered.

“Myeh, I might be biased because you stopped her from killing me, b-but I feel like she maybe should apologize first.”

She wanted to agree, but wasn’t sure she had the right. So she didn’t say anything for a while.

Eventually, however, she said, “I’m going to miss Casita.”

“Oh,” Tío Bruno breathed, he paused and when he spoke again his voice was tight and creaky, “yeah. M-me too.”

They sighed in unison. Staring out at the river Mirabel thought about Casita, and knew Tío Bruno was doing the same. The silence that settled once more over them was now punctuated by quiet sniffles from both of them.

Eventually, the quiet was broken by the crunch of pebbles beneath slowly moving feet. Mirabel gulped and squeezed her eyes shut, hoping it was one of her parents, sisters, or older cousins.

Tío Bruno turned and his arm tightened around her by the tiniest fraction. She stifled a groan and opened her mouth to apologize.

“She didn’t do this,” Tío Bruno said, before she could get a word out, his raspy voice taking shape as a growl, “she only wanted to help. I’m the one who lied. A-and then I was the one who told her to do everything else. I was like go! And she was like pfft! I don’t care what you think of me, but if you’re too stubborn to see how much she loves this family-!”

“I know Brunito,” Abuela said, voice soft, “I know.”

“Oh,” that seemed to take the wind out of his sails, and in different circumstances, Mirabel would have been amused, “w-well good. That’s uh, that’s good.”

She heard Abuela sigh, deeply.

Tío Bruno cleared his throat, uncomfortably, “So umm…?”

“You are so like your father,” Abuela whispered, “always jumping to protect the ones you love, even when-. Even when all you can do is-.”

She cut off and Mirabel lifted her head from her Tío’s shoulder. Abuela was standing on the shore of the river, looking out at something only she could see. Her eyes shined with unshed tears.

Both Bruno and Mirabel waited in silence.

“I’ve never been able to bring myself to come back here,” Abuela finally said, "this is where our miracle..."

It clicked, “This is where Abuelo…?”

She nodded mutely. A tear slipped free from her lashes and trailed down her cheek. Then she closed her eyes and hung her head.

“Mamá,” Tío Bruno said, voice pained. He looked to Mirabel for permission and when she nodded, stood and wrapped his arms around his mother. She allowed him to hold her, then lead her to the rock so she could sit where he had sat besides Mirabel.

“I thought I would be a different woman,” she said, “I thought we would have a different life. I-. Your Abuelo and I were from a town much larger than Encanto, growing up there was nothing like the childhoods you have had here. There were so many people. We didn’t meet until we were adults, not even in passing.”

“You uh, you never told me how you and Pá met,” Tío Bruno prompted gently.

She swallowed thickly, “Have I told you anything about him? I-I can’t recall.”

“No,” Mirabel said, fascinated by the turn this conversation was taking, “all we know is- is-.”

All they knew was how he’d died.

While they waited for her to start talking Tío Bruno kneeled beside them.

“We met by accident, on Dia de las Velitas, at the sermon for- or was it one of the games? Well, I didn't watch it, whatever it was. I-, it was crowded and I had arrived late, I was at the very back of the crowd and couldn’t see a thing. So, I climbed onto a lamppost. I looked up, I don’t remember why, but I looked up and… A butterfly, a butterfly crossed in front of me and I was watching it, and it passed by him next. By my Pedro. He was so handsome, he had had the same idea as me and stood there above the crowd. I’ll never forget how he looked that first time I saw him,” she smiled softly, “the butterfly caught his eye and when he looked past it, he caught me staring at him. He waved so I waved back and almost fell off my lamppost. He- we were too far away for me to hear his laugh, but I could see his smile and it made me feel-. From that first smile I knew I was going to fall for him.”

She took a stuttering breath, and Tío Bruno rubbed her back. Mirabel took one of her hands.

“It started with grabbing some food after the ceremony, and then we were seeing each other any chance we got. Before long he had proposed and we were planning our lives, together,” she put the emphasis on that last word and Mirabel’s heart broke for her, “we got married, got a place of our own, a-and got ready to start a family. He was apprenticing with the shoe cobbler, and writing on the side and I-I thought I would be a cobbler’s wife. I thought I would handle the front of the shop while he worked. I thought our children- if we had a son that he would-. I thought we would have a different life.”

Mirabel looked over at Tío Bruno and tried imagining him wearing a cobbler’s apron. She found that no matter what she did, she couldn’t make the image fit. From the way his eyes briefly lost focus, then his mouth twisted, he was having the same problem.

“We were a little worried when we found out we were having triplets, I was young and we were a lot more reliant on money out there. However, Pedro was so… excited, i-it was impossible to let my fears drag me down, his joy was too great to be overshadowed by any fear,” Abuela gave Tío Bruno a tight smile, “you may have gotten your bravery from him, but I’m afraid you got your tendency to worry from me. That was how we were. I could worry because he never let me sink too low, and he could breeze through life because I made sure his feet stayed on the ground. We- sometimes it felt like we were made for eachother, as if god himself crafted us to-, to-.”

She paused, taking deep breaths. They waited patiently, until she had calmed herself down enough to keep going.

Then Abuela smiled softly.

“When I gave birth to the three of you, I thought that was the hardest thing I would ever do, and that it would be the happiest day of my life. You were born in the morning. Pedro took care of you while I rested and recovered as much as one can from that sort of thing in a day. I remember lying in bed, listening to him making up songs to sing to you. Mostly just nonsense, explaining what he was doing, begging you not to cry too loud so I could nap, or even just your names over and over,” she chuckled and shook her head, “that was the happiest I’ve ever been.”

Slowly, the smile faded away.

“Then the sun set.”

Abuela didn’t say anything else for a long time, but then, she didn’t need to. They knew what came next, Abuela and Pedro were forced to leave their home, they fled into the rainforest with other refugees only for the raiders they were fleeing to follow them. Abuelo made his sacrifice, the miracle was born, and the rest was history.

Only now, with this new context, Mirabel understood how dark their family’s darkest hour really had been. She could see clearer than ever the grief stricken woman that had lost her husband, the life she had, even the person she had been, crying by the river. She could practically hear her Abuela’s sobs of fresh anguish echoing through the trees. For the first time Mirabel understood how much Abuela had lost, and how much she had survived.

She understood the price that was paid for their family’s miracle.

Was it worth it? Could anything ever be truly worth that?

She looked up at Tío Bruno, who frequently experienced migraines due to his gift. And he looked back at her, maybe thinking about how much trouble he went through to protect her from the consequences of being giftless.

Then Abuela said, “With the miracle I never had to worry that my children would know the same grief I had. I never wanted you to know.”

Tío Bruno’s face crumpled and he went from rubbing Abuela’s back to holding her again. He gently pressed his forehead to the crown of her head, like he used to do when he was comforting his children after nightmares or skinned knees. She looked at him out of the corner of her eye, and smiled sadly.

“With the miracle protecting us, I never had to worry I’d lose you too,” she whispered, then turned to look at Mirabel, “I was so desperate to keep it, to protect it, I forgot who the miracle was for.”

Mirabel squeezed her hand.

Abuela shook her head, sighing gustily, “I was never meant to do this alone. I was never-, Pedro was the one who knew how to protect us without squeezing too tight. I-I am so sorry. All I wanted-, I have hurt you, I have made you feel-. I am so sorry.”

Mirabel took her hand from Abuela’s so she could wrap her in a hug instead, she pressed her eyes shut as a few sympathetic tears slipped out. Tío Bruno shifted to accommodate her, gently placing a hand on her shoulder so the three of them were in one big group hug. She heard Abuela take a few shaky breaths.

Mirabel opened her eyes.

In the middle of the river, a golden butterfly landed on a long blade of grass.

She almost laughed. How could this possibly be the way things were supposed to go? Then again. How could things ever have gone any other way?

Tío Bruno was so focused on Abuela, he didn’t notice the butterfly, so Mirabel stood and pulled Abuela up with her. With her chin, she pointed it out, and even though Abuela didn’t know what Mirabel did, she looked at it with wonder. Slowly, they waded through the water so they could get closer. Tío Bruno started to follow them, then his eyes found the butterfly and a look of understanding passed over his face.

There was no surprise, and only the barest hint of relief as he made eye contact with her. He smiled at Mirabel, and nodded once. Then held back.

So, Mirabel led Abuela into the river alone.

For a second she stared at the butterfly, just trying to figure out what to say, then she started with a whispered, “Thank you, for telling me about Abuelo. I want to know as much about him as-. Anything you can share.”

Abuela turned from the butterfly to look at Mirabel, something shining in her eyes Mirabel couldn’t place.

It was funny, Mirabel had gotten so good at reading everybody in the family except Abuela. It was just that Abuela had always seemed above the rest of the family, somehow, she was the leader, the center, but not quite one of them. How had it never occurred to Mirabel how lonely it must be?

“Thank you for-, we have a home, a-a safe village, a loving family because of you, because of everything you did and survived. Thank you,” Mirabel all but whispered, the words feeling inadequate in the face of what she now understood, “You lost so much, and then gave us everything. I can’t imagine-.”

“And I don’t want you to,” Abuela insisted, gently cupping Mirabel’s cheek, “I have always wanted to shield you from all that. And I’m sorry that I let what it did to me hurt you.”

Mirabel shook her head, “Abuela, you’re my family. If this-. I don’t want to be shielded from you.”

Abuela drew a sharp breath in through her nose, then she smiled, tears running down her cheeks, “Ay, Mirabel, you could hold the whole world in your heart.”

She wasn’t sure which of them started the hug, but she suddenly found herself holding her Abuela tightly, both of them crying. Mirabel felt lighter than she could ever remember feeling, as her tears slowly dried up, she gave her Abuela one last squeeze. When she let her go, she gasped.

Surrounding them was a whirlwind of hundreds, maybe thousands of golden butterflies. They flew in a spiral, slowly rising into the sky. They trailed up and off flying back towards the Encanto. Mirabel smiled at them as she watched them go.

A/N: I headcanon that the musical numbers actually happen in canon and are a side effect of magic BUT I hate writing songfics and can not write music to save my life. So, I have decided to ignore my own personal headcanon for the sake of my sanity. Which meant I had to figure out how Abuela would tell the story of how she met Pedro.

#Mirabel Madrigal #Bruno Madrigal #Alma Madrigal #Encanto #Encanto AU

9 notes · View notes

fairycosmos · 1 year

Note

hey chloe, i’m really struggling today and i dont know how to carry on living. could you tell me about your day to distract me? also if you know any magic cures to pure suicidal self loathing please lmk <3

so so sorry to hear you're struggling, my lovely. i know words never really put a dent in these feelings when youre in the thick of them but i did want to let you know i get it and i don't blame you for being exhausted and at your wits end and i would be happy to tell you ab my day as a distraction. it was a WEIRD one! i woke up feeling depressed as fuck and super disconnected from reality but i had to go give a presentation at a university building in the city as a part of this job hunting process that im currently doing and it took like 2 weeks worth of mental energy to get up there in front of people not even being dramatic ive been so fucking insane in my head about this. i was thinking of my sister a lot during it all wondering what she would think of me doing it LOL. then on the way home someone stole £20 from me and then someone ELSE kicked my backpack on the train and smashed the bottle of wine i had in there and i was very close to crying but didn't. then i got home and took my pill and listened to music and made dinner which was a chickpea curry and gave my dog some of the treats she was begging for. and since then ive just been sitting and blogging and breathing and i still feel like shit, but the feeling is constantly moving, constantly proving itself not to be completely permanent the way it wants to convince me it is in my lowest moments. i am really sad right now but not enough to kill myself and that is improvement. while there is no magic cure to suicidal self loathing there is the knowledge that you're not alone in this and that no feeling is final and that you deserve better than this even if the thought feels completely fake and foreign in your head. verbalising what you're going through, learning to identify what triggers you, building a crisis plan and a support network for yourself.....none of it is easy or a straight up solution and none of it is really enough, but it is something, it is proof that where you are isn't where you'll always be. as cheesy and as horrible as it is to feel and admit and know. i am gonna leave some links to a few resources that recommend some great coping mechanisms - again, not cures - but if you let them in they can be enough to get you through. it's ok if youre not ready for that right now and need to come back to it later, there is no rush or timeline. just know it'll always be here if you need it and i care very much about your wellbeing, and i believe in your ability to manage and live alongside these feelings even it seems like a complete impossibility in this moment. sending a massive hug, please please look after yourself. X

resource / resource / resource/ resource / useful hotlines

#tw suicide #anon

20 notes · View notes

a-mag-a-day · 1 year

Note

MAG 32 - quite a bunch of the next few episodes (stretching into S2) I all listened to while again… apple cutting! It took me a bit to realize, that I could use other activities as well to listen to podcasts.

When I heard that this is Jane Prentiss' statement, I was pretty excited as my sister had told me several times that this is one of her favorite statements! Spoiler alert, listening to this the first time I didn't understand anything of what's going on XD Now I also think it's one of the coolest episodes. Having a statement so early on about the nature of why someone is on the path to become an Avatar and also featuring all 14 Fears as foreshadowing that they can't be separated is really something.

Oliver is one hell of a character. He makes appearances without us realizing until S4.

"I have touched something now, though, that all my talk of ley lines and mother goddesses could never have prepared me for. It is not a god. Or if it is then it is a dead god, decayed and clammy corpse-flesh brimming with writhing graveworms." - this is so Cthulhu-esque to me. Having come in contact with an old one and completely losing one's mind.

11:39 "Did I hear the song then?", at "hear" thumpthump - it is so funny to me how I never heard those in any of my runs but now I always sit with the transcript, listening veeery closely.

12:40 "…than a warm, wet habitat for the billion crawling things…", at "habitat" another thump!

13:06 "I remember shouting", ok is it just me or is there again a thump at "shouting"?

"I do remember that they called me “toxic”. I don’t think I really knew what that meant, except that it was the reason I was so very painfully lonely." That does remember me of a now distant friend. They act very narcissistic and it drains all my energy. It seems like they have this hierarchy in their head, being super friendly when meeting someone and getting to know then until they thought they surpassed them in prestige and then they get… difficult. They pretty much removed themselves from our friend circle one by one, every one of us having had the same experiences in completely disconnected instances. But they still want to be a part of our group, want to be loved by us and everyone, but they feel that we all got very reluctant to doing things with them. I can imagine that this may have been a similar situation to which this description refers to.

17:01 "but she was already showing signs of the… infestation", thump at "infestation", wow, that episode really got them. -"They quickly burrowed through the soft tissue of the medical personnel – eyes, tongue, et cetera" - ok, is this the reason why Martin was so paranoid of having worms infesting his tongue?? -"It’s not, though. I know it’s not natural. Somehow I… I feel it." - Ooooh, and the music starts kicking in! He's starting to Know things… And right after Prentiss' statement of all things.

I love how this statement deals not just with the infestation and creepy crawlers but also the deeper meaning of the Corruption of toxic love. I once read understanding this particular description in a way of a toxic relationship to fandoms. Of having this… need to satisfy and appease your fanbase and it's destroying you.

This one really helps put into perspective Jon's conversation with Martin in episode 39

Ah yes- a fandom is a hive mind that screams love, sometimes in the worst ways possible

#a mag a day #tma #the magnus archives #episode asks #mod ashes #tma spoilers #mag 32 #lycanlovingvampyre

19 notes · View notes

crownshattered-arch · 8 months

Text

|| my brain will NOT stop running soooooo here, have some thoughts for my TWST oc based on Elsa~ (and i may give him other verses if i add him so check this out~)

Thinking his name should be something like Isfrid...idk what his last name should be. But he essentially looks like the male version of Elsa. Pretty snow-white hair, crystal blue eyes, just gorgeous~ Isfrid is a fairy but he uses magic to make his ears round and his eyes normal. I think I want him to go to RSA, and he's in a specific dorm that my sister made~ (i may go into more detail later XDD)

I don't know the name of his signature spell, but its ability allows him to turn things into ice/freeze things. He can't actually create ice or snow. However, he can turn water in the air into ice (this is very difficult unless it's super humid outside). However, this power is so strong that it's hard to control. He doesn't want to touch anyone because it's just too easy for him to turn them to ice. He must remain completely emotionless/disconnected or else the air around him will get colder and the ground beneath his feet will freeze.

Adding onto this, he can also unfreeze things, but he isn't naturally at the point where he realizes this. If he thinks happy and warm thoughts, even if the emotions are very strong, nothing will freeze. However, he distances himself so much that he rarely ever feels such warmth. Alanna makes him feel warm like this, but he doesn't realize that it's nullifying the effects of his bitter cold.

He and Alanna have no prior connections. They aren't actually related and only met once Alanna started to go to RSA. I think maybe they were paired up for a cross-class assignment on her first day of school (he's either a 2nd or 3rd year) and she's kind of clung to him since then. They are NOT shipped and they will never be shipped. They see each other as siblings now, but Isfrid is afraid of hurting her so he doesn't stand too close.

So his past is pretty jumbled... I have many ideas but no concrete storyline. Just know that wherever he's from, he was probably an important figure. However, something happened (likely a really big emotional outburst) that caused him to literally freeze the entire town and killed everyone who lived there. He then ran away and lived in cold isolation for a years (keep in mind that he's a fairy so he has a long life). At some point, he letter from RSA saying he was accepted into the school. He decided that a magic school may teach him how to control his magic, so he left his self-imposed prison of ice and pretended to be human as he attended school.

He never had a "Let It Go" moment, even though I added the song to his playlist. He's stuck in his "Monster" age, unfortunately~ When he ran away from his home, he never thought "well, I'm alone now so I can now be free!!" Instead, he just trapped himself in a cave and lost himself in the blizzard that came from his guilt and horror at what he did~

That's it for now!! Let me know if you guys are really interested in him and I may just add him to my blog~ Plus I'll probably give him more verses too, so he'll be flexible!! But I only want to add him if people show interest!!

#(okay i'll be leaving soon and i wont be back until late~ SO HAVE THIS!!!)#◢||⋇ why do you write like you’re running out of time? [ooc] ⋇||◣

2 notes · View notes

freakscircus · 1 year

Note

I'm 19 and just moved away from home to a new city and have decided to start dating and/or hooking up with people for the first time--do you have any advice? Very inexperienced + worried about things like what if it's awkward? What if we don't have anything to talk about? How soon is too soon to go to each other's apartments? Thank you for any help you can offer (you feel like a wise older sister) :)

thank you for saying that! honestly a lot of this stuff is based on your comfort level entirely. dating is a learning curve and you really do end up figuring out skills that help. i think my ability to meet new people and connect with them on a platonic level has a lot to do with the amount of first dates i've been on in my life which has taught me how to get along with a total stranger. if you have some single friends, definitely compare notes and swap stories! even if something doesn't go well or feels awkward, i promise its not a referendum on you or who you are, just roll with it and learn. the nerves really go away after time too!

i'm going to list out some disconnected pieces of advice i wish i knew when i started dating and hooking up: if something feels wrong, trust your gut and don't feel obligated to do anything you don't want to do at any point ever. its totally fine to leave the date after an hour, leave their apartment without anything happening, or stop seeing someone at any time, although you should communicate through that. there is no set timeline for anything and if someone starts making you feel that way... stay away. it may be awkward at first to go on dates but i promise it gets easier - approach it more like building a friendship than looking for a romantic partner. make sure everyone treats you with a base level of respect, even hookup partners. don't make the mistake i see a lot of people (including myself at one point) make and assume that a hookup is allowed to treat you a certain way because its just sex. they should at the baseline treat you as a friend and equal and if they don't, remove yourself from the situation. do not ignore red flags or bad behavior or things that hurt your feelings just because you like someone, the chances of that person getting better over time is very low. communication about feelings and intentions at every stage is key, even just for flings. avoid avoidant partners like the plague. good luck out there! i had a really fun time in my FWB phase and met so many interesting and beautiful people and am still friends with a few of them to this day and i definitely learned a lot about myself. i approached those relationships as a good friend i hooked up with, but i also loved spending time with them too and we would stay up talking a lot or hang out until bars closed! you will definitely find those same types of connections and people you really enjoy. now i am super happy in a committed relationship because i feel like my wild oats are out of my system

5 notes · View notes

jess-oh · 2 months

Text

what do i title this

Hello, journal!

I dont think I've actually ever reread an entry until today. A part of me was always so afraid of the shame I'd feel of who I used to be. I haven't written here in a while since I realize I kept trying to think my way out of everything which caused a severe disconnect between my heart and my mind but my therapist, Sophia Ou, encouraged me to journal again to process my thoughts but to instead focus on how I feel instead so I'm here to give it a go!

Current update on where I'm at in life. I still live in Chicago on Buena Ave in Buena Park. I started going to Planet Fitness a couple months ago and am still trying to figure out a good schedule between traditional workouts and climbing. I have a new schedule for this week and I feel pretty good about it. It consists of waking up at 6:30am Monday through Thursday where I workout before work Monday through Wednesday, climb after work Wednesday, climb before on Thursday, and after service on Sunday. I'm slowly becoming entirely too busy again. I do really enjoy serving youth group but Cara has been pushing for us, me and Khalid, to be more involved and dedicate more time to the ministry/greater church recently. I already am so busy and have been enjoying having no social plans scheduled during the week. I do my best to give her space to speak and share her ideas but sometimes it's hard to interject and communicate my thoughts and concerns. There's also some semblance of guilt that quietly goes along with it. Who am I to disagree with her stance as it relates to matters of the church when I, myself, am not all right, with God? I just really need to carve out time in my schedule to dedicate to him again. I remember around this time, last year, I was super dedicated to doing daily QTs as I was losing my mind over the potential opportunity of moving to a new city for a Google Fellowship. I have built so much of my life in Chicago and giving that all up for 6 months shook me to my very core. I don't think I was mentally prepared to take that risk then but so much has changed now. I'm not that close with Sophie and Thor anymore, I've been at a new church post Lakeview for a while now, and have generally grown as a person. I hangout with Earl and Gongjoo a lot more now, which has been great, especially getting to play with Ellia! Her first birthday was only a couple months ago! I love her so much!

If the opportunity for a new job arose today, I would still feel hesitant to take it but I feel a lot more prepared now. Thank you for knowing what I needed at that time, God.

Currently, I'm a graphic designer at Freeosk. I've technically been here for 3 years since my hire date but my full time Freeoskiversary is on June 1st. I recently started looking into UX Design and while there is still much research to do before fully making the career jump, I actually feel pretty good about pursuing this path. Even the thought of being able to research and gather data made me feel excited for some internal work on a Freeosk project recently. I need to work on my fear of public speaking and be more comfortable with presenting but I think this feels like a good idea.

God, I pray for guidance as I attempt to navigate my next steps from here. I'm not sure what you have planned for my life and I know I so often rely only on my shoulders but I definitely want to make sure I'm right by you first before actually making any life changing decisions moving forward. I don't yet know what the future holds but I am excited to found out. For once, I am excited for life and what it can bring. I am no longer so afraid of the pain but I am bright-eyed for a brighter future. Please let this future come.

I had a series of unfortunate events happen recently(e.g. scraped car door pretty bad and had to pay 2k for repairs, 2 credit cards and $100 cash stolen from wallet, my dad got laid off and still hasnt found a job in 2 months, my relationship with my sister got tense because of my disproval of her boyfriend, i realized i outgrew my friendship with sophie, and i havent been right with God lately). I've been doing my best to just keep my head held up high and push through but it has admittedly been hard and discouraging. Not yet depressing discouraging but definitely a challenge, nonetheless.

Thank you for all that you have done and will do for my life, God.

I pray this all in your name,

Amen.

#long time no see

0 notes

missspringthyme · 3 months

Text

February 9th, 2024

My sister shares a room with another girl and so they're used to getting up without waking other people in the room. They kept the shades drawn and moved around silently in the dark. They didn't realize, but I was awake too. I have a lot of trouble getting up in the dark, but I will say when I finally did it was much better than the shock of a light switch 1 minute after waking up like I normally do.

My sister and her roommate both had classes so they left me alone in the room. I ate the last of the pastries I had brought with me as a snack for the bus for breakfast and worked on finishing my journal entry for yesterday.

When she came back from class I decided to head out and explore Utrecht. I walked into town instead of taking the tram like she suggested, the tram would have only saved me about 10 minutes and it was nice to take it in slowly.

I just wandered around a little aimlessly before heading to the dom. Originally I was considering heading up the tower but I decided I didn't want to spend the money when it was almost completely covered in scaffolding for renovations. Instead, I decided to just go inside the church and look around.

My view on religion has never been super straightforward. I was raised catholic, while in a multi-cultural environment. As a kid I remember telling my mom that I thought all gods were real. I think my mom thought she was teaching me to respect other cultures but instead she was making me view religion as all the same. When I eventually stopped being religious I went through a brief insufferable atheist phase, but not I've mellowed out to something more like I'm a little uncomfortable with organized religion, and I feel like sometimes people use religion as a crutch, but also that if a belief system gives someone meaning then that's worth something.

Additionally, I also really fucking love history and humans, and religion has played a large role in that, so I do know a little bit more than the average person. So being in the cathedral was pretty cool. Like most cathedrals in Europe it as a pretty crazy history spanning 100s of years. I particularly enjoyed that some of the artwork in the church was destroyed during the reformation. Smashing in a saints face feels a bit more sacrilegious than just taking down the art work, but I guess I wasn't alive back then. Taking 2nd place is that half of the dom was destroyed by a fucking tornado(?) And then just bricked over which is why the tower is now disconnected from the cathedral.

When I go inside churches I still always light a candle for my grandma. I may not be religious, but a tradition is a tradition and she would like it. It's also incredibly big and gorgeous, so I was happy to throw a couple of euros to helping with conservation efforts.

I then waited outside in a place with wifi for my sister to meet me after her class got out. A couple approached me and asked for help getting up the tower and I tried my best to help them despite also being a tourist. Guess I looked like a local. I bet it's my big scarf.

My sister came and we tried to find something to do that was still open and settled on a museum. Pretty much all of them closed in an hour but we decided an hour was better than nothing. Originally we were going to go to a different museum, but we passes one that she said that she had been told was a boring museum with a car on display. I was instantly curious so we changed plans.

It turned out to be a museum that held Dutch Christian artifacts dating back 100s of years, so I ended up having a very Christianity heavy day. The guy at the front let us go in for free because we only had an hour, but mostly he just seemed excited that 2 young people wanted to come in. No car in the museum though, although I kept saying I hoped they had a pope mobile.

Lots of stuff was very pretty and/or interesting, with my favorites being the fucked up medieval artwork. It's really interesting how much more present death used to be in artwork and everyday items. I remember watching an episode of a try guys baking show where they made skull cakes but then blurred the skulls. It made me more uncomfortable than if they had left it unblurred, but if I'm honest I think we've made a mistake by keeping death hidden. I say that as someone with a deep, crushing, existential fear of death. We have things to learn from the society that was produced by the plague years.

After the museum I tried riding facing backwards on the bike which sucked, but at least I know that side saddle is my better option. It was a lit easier without wearing a heavy backpack though. We stopped at the grocery store to get dinner and got tortellini and some pastries as snacks. I ate mine on the back of the bike.

That night the power went out in my sister's unit so it allowed us to go to bed a little early. Not that I'm complaining, I was exhausted. Overall good day.

#sister #febuary #travel

0 notes

cosettepontmercys · 7 months

Note

Hi! I hope everything is okay and you have started to feel better! That really sucks you had to cancel all your weekend plans though. Hopefully you feel better soon!!!

But ya I really like the ice cream back cover and I like some of the pics from the cd that I've seen. Some of those could maybe be better cover choices though. My sister pointed out that why was she wearing the same shirt from the sunrise cover on the back of the pink cover too..like the outfits don't match and I'm sorry..but it bothers me now! Other than that, yes I'm excited! I will admit that 1989 is not one of my fav albums. Sometimes the songs just blend together and one of the eras I felt kinda disconnected to her at the time and my old friends always hated her. I never stopped loving her but she kinda became like the popular girl and I couldn't relate to that even though I was also hanging out with my friends a lot during that time..but by reputation I was fully back in and also by that time all my friends had left me lol..so weirdly it did kinda like up with my life actually..which is why I'll forever love Taylor haha. Thats so cute..I think I found the Teardrops MV on someone's Myspace actually lol! I knew Our Song and maybe some of her other videos but never actually owned the Debut album. Fun.fact..i had the biggest crush on a boy named Drew in high school too..so I really relate to the song and gives me memories of high school. Ooh I connected Is it over Now? To her fame and career actually similar to the Lucky One or Nothing New but I didn't think of the slut connection! But I also saw a lot of people say is it over Now is probably a relationship..and as a closer, maybe it's actually pretty similar to Clean and that's my favorite song on the album so I'm kinda excited for that one now too. Also..I have never been out of the country so I think it's so cool that you came here from Hong Kong! I can't imagine what that would be like.

My favorite show was probably Wicked..cuz that was the first show I ever saw..and I had a lot of excitement for it. I didn't know the whole story and seeing the costumes and sets was also cool. Rent was another favorite, which I think I told you. I also got to see Darren Criss in Hedwig as the second show I saw. I liked Into the Woods cuz I got to see Gavin Creel and Stephanie J Block and her husband. I saw CATS and Lucky enough to be 2nd row and see the makeup and costumes up close and it was my 1st show back since the pandemic..so it made me really excited. I got to see HP and the Cursed Child and I never saw a play before but it wouldn't be my fav cuz it didn't have any songs..but still liked some music. Hadestown was cool cuz it's all singing and the effects and i wasn't as familiar with it either. It would be so cool to see that show without knowing anything about it beforehand.. Dear Evan Hansen is one of my fav shows as well and that was the last show I saw. But i never got to see Waitress or Hamilton and those would have been favorites probably. I'm still hoping for Les Mis next month too. What about you? How many shows have you seen overall or estimated?

Ya it didn't feel like that much..obviously they added the two songs and maybe a few 5 minute scenes..idk. I am excited to watch Theater Camp later tonight. How was it? I hope it's good and that you liked it! For the books, it was a book called the Unfortunate side effects of Heartbreak and Magic..I just read the synopsis but it was a book about witches so that's why I considered it. The other one was called Running Past Dark and it was kinda a mystery and what happened to her twin sister. I read a snippet of it but was unsure cuz I think both of these books just came out too so idk. But that one seemed kinda similar to another book called Whistleblower that's on my list..I think I picked it for orange cover. It's just a maybe at this point though. I hope you're taking this time to relax and feel better!!!

thank you!! 🤍 i am still not feeling super great, so i might have to go back to the doctor's this week :( apologies in advance for 1) how late this reply is + 2) if i missed anything !! 🤍

i think the ice cream cover is so so cute! i just love how happy she looks in these photos :") and i didn't notice that until you/your sister pointed that out! i love 1989, but i connect more to some of her other albums/gravitate towards them more! the album i reach for the least is definitely reputation, but i also still like it a lot. i'm very curious to see how rep tv will sound, since it's the most recent one. and i sometimes find myself wondering how her 5th album would've sounded — or how different her career would be today — if she had won for red!! i was never on myspace, but i remember seeing things about taylor's myspace!! my first social media was facebook, and i was definitely far too young to have a facebook account haha. i feel like whenever my friends and i theorize about vault tracks and how they'll sound, we're wildly off, so it'll be interesting to see what we get!!

wicked is SO fun live!!! the costumes and the set and choreo is just so good, it's just a show and i hope the movie will be similarly impressive. i don't know if i told you that i've never seen rent — i was supposed to see the ... 20th anniversary tour a few years ago when they were in seattle but also had bronchitis back then (funnily enough, wicked was also here that summer and i also had to miss seeing wicked that time around). i'm so so jealous you saw gavin creel, SJB and seb arcelus in into the woods — i wanted to see into the woods so badly </3 i've been very lucky to see a lot of shows but i've also seen a lot of things repeatedly so my number is pretty high! i think my favorite show i've ever seen live is either: hadestown, newsies (first show on broadway, very sentimental to me), marie dancing still, waitress, or come from away but i think i also have a lot of very fond memories associated with specific shows/performances — like i met one of my best friends at oklahoma!

i really enjoyed theatre camp! it was like, everything i love and hate about theatre people and i will admit that i cried a bit at the end!!! but i do cry at everything! i love molly gordon <3333 and noah galvin is very, very talented. did you like it? what did you think of it? and ooh! you'll have to let me know how those books are! i haven't been reading much lately but i have been watching some tv!! i finally watched season 2 of heartstopper, and then finished watching why didn't they ask evans? (i watched the first ep and then never finished but finished last night)! i'm almost done with my audiobook though, and then hopefully i'll feel up to reading something soooonish.

hope you're doing well and having a good monday! 🤍

#post: answered #🩷 anon

1 note · View note

doxiedreg · 8 months

Text

It's Hispanic heritage month and I always feel so weird about it when it comes to my own identity

My parents were born and raised in Chile, my two older sisters too. But then Pinochet happened and my family fled to the Netherlands. Which is where I was born and raised.. and just it makes me feel so disconnected. I don't know what to call myself..

We spoke a mix of Spanish and Dutch as I grew up tho I preferred Dutch as a child. I was raised with Chilean food which I greatly love. I had some Chilean comic books (mampatu) I knew of some Chilean popculture such as 31 minutos and some mexican media as wel (Chavo del ocho and chapulin Colorado)

I went to Chile once as a child when I was like idk 10 and met my family and country in person for the first time

But other than that..I was pretty disconnected. I didn't really talk much with my aunts and uncles and cousins outside of that one time I went to Chile.

I instead just had my immediate family of my parents and my two older sisters.

I didn't grow up with the experience my peers had with being able to hang out with extended family. And I always looked different from everyone else. It didn't help that I had undiagnosed autism. I just always felt like an outsider I guess and I was also bullied for most of my life. I had some good friends but no best friends. Relationships were shallow. I wasn't anyone's first choice. I didn't feel super close to anyone until I discovered the internet art community (and boy did that go bad at first because of my naivity and my longing to be deeply cared about)

Tangent aside, I guess I still feel like an outsider to some extent. I don't feel like I'm Dutch but I also don't feel like I'm Chilean. I'm stuck in between. I don't belong in either. And just it feels weird.. Like if it was that one parent was Dutch and the other Chilean I would be Dutch/Chilean. But no both my parents and sisters were born and raised in Chile. I was born here and I was also conceived very late compared to my sisters. So its just..I don't know what I am.

And it makes me kinda sad..

#lena whines #vent

1 note · View note

apoemformythoughts · 2 years

Text

I can’t help but feel a disconnect between me and my family members. In Conan Gray’s “Family Line”, one of the lyrics is “we may share a face, we may share a last name but we are not the same”. I really relate to this. My family has felt distant for a while now; my father is constantly at work, and my mother is trying to deal with her own emotions and health problems. My growing beliefs in what is right and wrong are so different from my parents, it disconnects us. Even my sister, who I would say I’m close to, I would say I am super connected to. I don’t go to her when I need to rant. I don’t know. I feel like my family is a photo that got torn apart. We had our time together, but anything that can be done to patch the tears won’t make everything perfect again.

0 notes

pascalina · 3 years

Text

The brothers' movie

11/07/2015

They don't use the same last name, but they are siblings. Pedro Pascal (40) the Chilean actor who starred in Game of Thrones and now has a starring role in the Netflix series Narcos, uses his mother's surname because it is easier to pronounce in English. 17 years younger, Lucas Balmaceda Pascal (23), also an actor, debuted in Los 80 and today stars in the TVN series Juana Brava. Here, both talk for the first time about their relationship, their love for cinema and their mutual admiration.

José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal was born in Chile, but a few months later he had to go into exile with his parents and his older sister, Javiera, to Denmark. It was the end of 1975. Thanks to the Rockefeller scholarship granted for his father, the doctor José Balmaceda Riera, a year later they moved to the United States: first they lived in San Antonio, Texas. Life there was just beginning and it was not easy.

Seventeen years later, in 1992, Lucas Balmaceda was born in Orange County, California, into the comfort of a family that was financially in its prime. His dad was at the peak of his career: as a fertility specialist and director of one of the University of California's reproductive health centers. But suddenly they moved back to Chile when Lucas was three years old and his brother Nicolas was eight. The two older ones stayed there. Pedro was already studying drama at Orange County High School of the Arts. Then he went to New York to study theater at the Tisch School of the Arts at New York University.

After a couple of small appearances in TV series, in 2014 he took the big leap in his career: he played Prince Oberyn in Game of Thrones, which made him world famous. Today, he has a starring role in the series Narcos. He is also filming a movie with Matt Damon and Willem Dafoe.

Fame came early for Lucas. After leaving Saint George High School in 2010, he studied theater at the Universidad Católica, and he began to shine: in year fourth, he starred in the theater play "La noche obstinada", by choreographer Pablo Rotemberg, and got a role in the successful television series Los 80 and today, in his last year, he is the co-star of Juana Brava, the new TVN nighttime series.

Scene one:

Lucas appears in Pedro's life

P: "I was 17 when Lucas was born. He was a baby when I left to go to university. I remember my first visit back and Lucas, who was not even two years old, was already the owner of the house. I remember those looks, wanting to tell me: 'I don't know who you are, but this is my house, mate.

To this day I have never seen that personality in another child. It was fascinating to see that wit in someone so small. Since he was a kid he had that fierce intelligence... The four siblings, Javiera, the eldest and the queen of the family; Nicolas, the doctor; Lucas and I are like a compact and consistent unit. I can't imagine life without them".

L: "Pedro was studying at the university in New York when I was born. When he went home for vacations to see the family, as I didn't know him, I thought: 'who is this guest, who is this weirdo who kisses my mother? She's mine!'. Back in Chile, every year Pedro came to visit us. It was the most entertaining thing in the world for me. He was much older and he would come with all the coolness, with all the culture of cinema, with horror movies that were not available here. Then we would watch them and play them out, we would do sketches. We would play that Pedro was a murderous monster and we would escape from him. We were each a character. He was very funny, he did voices, he impersonated people. He gets mad when I tell him, but I've always found that he has a Jim Carrey thing about him, he manages to make some impressive faces. When he came on, I couldn't stop watching him, he was too entertaining. We are all big movie buffs thanks to my dad. When I was three years old, he took my brothers and me to see Batman. I remember crying hysterically. I was very young, sensitive, and being in the cinema was like entering to another reality: loud noises, giant screen. I didn't understand anything.

Scene two

Transplanted

P: "What's Chilean about me and what's gringo about me is a very interesting question, because I don't think even at 40 years old I've been able to figure it out. I was raised and educated in the United States and socialized a lot with American pop culture, but Chilean pride has always been unwavering. My parents were exiled for eight years. So our visits to Chile were regular. My whole life I have lived in the United States and my whole life I have visited my relatives in Chile. However, since my siblings were raised in Chile, my connection to the country is much stronger today and it is something I am grateful for. Something that happens to me a lot is that when I say I've been in the U.S. my whole life, they say, "Well, you're a gringo then! And after a conversation in my fluent Spanish with a clear Chilean accent that same person turns around and says: I've been listening to you, you're Chilean!

L: "I am Chilean because I lived and grew up here since I was three years old, but at the same time I have a cultural disconnection: my parents lived 25 years in the United States, my brothers are gringos. My visual culture is super gringo, the TV shows I watched when I was a kid or the movies I watch to this day I understand them from that place: as an American. More than being born in the United States, I feel it's because of my family's background".

SCENE THREE:

The performance

P: "There were good years and bad years (when I started my acting career in the United States). Many years I was a waiter to supplement my income. But from a very young age I was auditioning for professional jobs. In my late twenties my career in the theater was relatively consistent. Then, when opportunities in television arose, I was consolidating and it became much easier to pay my expenses. I think that struggle, going through those situations, empowers you a lot and it's one of the things I'm enormously grateful for. And Game of Thrones was an incredible gift. It's the best role I've ever played and they're the best people I've ever worked with."

L: "It's Pedro's fault that I wanted to be an actor. But when I told him I wanted to study theater it was hard for him, more than anything, because he cares about me and studying theater is hard. You have to be very wise and have a super high self-esteem to take care of yourself. Pedro went through many things. If there is an actor who doesn't have contacts in the United States, it's him. Everything he has achieved is because of his work. That's why when people ask me why I don't go to the U.S., it's a resounding no. Being Pedro Pascal's little brother is not going to get me around the corner; I would have to be Tom Cruise's twin to achieve anything. Even so, Pedro had many failed career starts. In 2011, for example, he was offered a starring role in a series called Wonder Woman and it was eventually canceled. That's why, when Games of Thrones came up, I was like, wow! We were all freaking out, because Games of Thrones is like a worldwide trending topic. All the episodes he was in, we were all watching them together at my house, eating pizza or sushi."

SCENE FOUR:

Mutual lessons

P: "I try not to get too involved in anything Lucas does or how he does it. He has single-handedly created each of his experiences and is one of the most inspiring things I've ever seen. He loves his work and is continually developing his skills for television and theater, and eventually film. He executes like a real artist and, to be honest, it is more common for me to learn something from him than for him to learn something from me. I mean that very sincerely. Lucas reminds me to work hard and keeps me inspired. When I saw him in Los 80 I was incredibly proud, but not surprised. I was seeing something I had always known. The only advice I've given him is to not be such a workaholic, to take care of himself and to be proud of what he's accomplished and what he still has yet to accomplish. Deep down, I'm always going to be the protective big brother."

L: "Pedro is an object of admiration for me. What he says is law for me. Sometimes I ask him: 'Pedro, did you see that movie?' and he says: 'Yes, I didn't like it'. I tell him: 'Oh, I didn't like it either'. The nice thing about our relationship is that it happens so sporadically, once or twice a year, that the moments when we see each other are very intense. We either fight a lot or we love each other too much, but it's always like a story, like a movie. While he's there and I'm here, we talk a lot on WhatsApp and Facebook".

P: "With Lucas we always keep each other up to date on what movies to watch, what TV shows are good. I bug him all the time asking him about what's going on in his life and I'm always asking him about his perspective on things. Despite being away from each other for a long time, Lucas and I are very close and always have been. I see Lucas at the beginning of an amazing career, with an unwavering curiosity and passion. I love it when he confides in me about things he is enjoying or situations he is dealing with."

L: "I've never seen Pedro in theater, but I've been told he's tremendous. On camera, I find that he has a very intense look. He also has, and in that we are very similar, a very strong visual culture, the fact that we have always liked horror movies. He plays characters that hide something, dark characters. A great strength is that he is very sensual, he knows how to handle himself well from seduction".

P: "Lucas is brave, he's fearless. There's nothing he's not willing to try, he's never going to give up on a challenge, he's never going to leave something halfway, no matter what that means to him. Lucas is unstoppable.

Link interview

#pedro pascal #lux pascal #siblings

172 notes · View notes

naralanis · 3 years

Text

little bumps in the road (pt. 4)

Parts 1, 2, 3

they’re in kansas now, and for the first time since this madness began, lena is completely and utterly alone.

they’ve stopped at the dingiest motel lena has ever seen in her life--which, given the places they’ve frequented recently, is really saying something--the kind of place that is maybe definitely run by a serial killer or someone nearly equally unsavoury.

and lena? lena is not coping well.

“i’ll be gone twenty, thirty minutes, tops,” kara had said exactly twenty-four minutes ago. “keep the blinds shut, and don’t open the door no matter what--no matter what, lena.

and so lena has been sitting here, waiting, staring at the worn wood of a door that maybe had once been painted red, not moving a muscle. she’s sitting cross-legged on the miserably thin mattress and scratchy bedding, hugging a floppy threadbare pillow tightly to her chest because she’s afraid the panic will simply burst out of her if she doesn’t hold on to anything at all.

lena tries to calm herself, she does--has been trying for the past twenty-four minutes and thirty-nine seconds. she tries to distance herself from her thundering heartbeat and shallow breaths, tries to remove herself from her own fear. she closes her eyes, measures and calibrates the movement of her lungs, thinks of a metronome in her head to help her keep a smooth, steady rhythm that isn’t so frantic as it is now.

she focuses on the pilled, rough fabric of the pillowcase, lets her nails (she’d like to clip them, would like to stop digging crescents into her palms when she clenches her hands into fists with nervousness) drag across the fabric and catch onto the rough stitching of the seams, counts every little rip, every little torn seam.

then she focuses on the smells--there’s that odd, lingering odor of old plastic that comes from the phone and the tv; there’s the dust that irritates her nose a little, makes her eyes water some. and then there’s mothballs, which this room is sure to have an abundance of, which smell oddly comforting for some reason, like an old house with old cabinets.

she’s almost back in control, can feel her lungs expanding further now, with more ease, when the hum of the staticky television set--it was almost on mute, the volume is so low--breaks her concentration, shatters it like hot glass doused with ice.

“...and it’s... it hurts, really, that i was not able to see the madness; it pains me that my own sister was capable of such atrocity...

lena jumps, fumbles for the remote and raises the volume until it is deafening, so loud and deafening it’s like her brother is yelling at her--but he isn’t, he’s speaking calmly to some reporter, a grief-stricken expression plastered on his face, with tears--actual tears--pooling at his eyes.

“i blame myself,” lex’s voice booms from the old tinny speakers, distorted and haunted, rattling the glass from the windows as much as lena’s bones, echoing in lena’s brain like a well-crafted taunt.

“i should have seen it. i should have done something to stop her--i should have saved supergirl.”

lena wants to scream, but she can’t even breathe, she can’t do anything but tremble and she hates, hates the sound of his voice in her ears, hates, hates and hates herself for falling for his tricks over and over and over again.

“hey! turn it down, lena, are you crazy??”

kara materializes out of nowhere--lena didn’t even notice her stepping through the door. the blonde yanks the remote and shuts the tv off , and lena doesn’t register her worried gaze, doesn’t feel the arms rubbing at her shoulders. she can’t hear the concern in kara’s voice as she repeatedly asks her what’s wrong.

“i can’t do this,” lena finally chokes, words caught in a sob--her shoulders are trembling, her throat is tight, and her eyes are burning with tears, and she can’t, can’t, can’t do this. “i can’t do it, kara, i just can’t.”

“what are you talking about?” kara asks, brow crinkled in that way that is so, so familiar, from a whole lifetime, a whole world ago and it only serves to untheter lena further, disconnects her from this reality, makes her want to wake up from this nightmare.

“i can’t do this with you. i’m” she’s gasping now, words stuck and hurt in her throat, hurting and breaking her from the inside out, but lena has to say it, has to speak it into truth. “kara, i’m crazy.”

kara shakes her head vigorously, but lena doesn’t let her speak.

“i’m-- i’m insane; i’m the luthor who tried--oh my god, i’m, i’m the luthor who did kill a super!”

“stop it,” kara hisses, and lena finally registers the force of the grip on her shoulders as the blonde practically shakes her. “stop that nonsense right now, lena -- you’re not crazy, i’m not dead, i’m right here--”

“but you were!” lena practically shrieks, because can’t kara see? “you were dead, kara, i killed you.”

kara’s hands tighten--lena will definitely have bruises on her arms later--but what stops her is the intensity of that blue gaze.

“lena,” kara says, biting out the words like they hurt. “this was all lex’s fault. don’t let him get in your head, not again.”

“he’s always in my head,” lena cries, because isn’t that the truth? ever since they were children? “he’s always--he’s always there, and he’s, he’s taunting me, kara! i didn’t see his madness before, and now in this world, i’m the crazy luthor who’s killed a super!”

“and yet, here I am,” kara points out, gently, but with a fear in her eyes she simply can’t conceal. “right here, in front of you, in a motel in Kansas, because we are running from your brother. because he is the crazy one. not you. we’re gonna take him down, you hear me?”

lena’s madness has gone into hysteria, that’s the only explanation for the incredulous laughter that bubbles out of her, choking out her sobs momentarily. “take him down? maybe you’re the crazy one. how the fuck are we going to take him down, kara? he’s the good luthor in this earth.”

kara’s brows furrow, but it’s a crinkle of determination, this time. lena is shocked to recognize it, shocked she understands the sheer force of will behind kara’s voice.

“together. we take him down together.”

<< Previous || Next >>

#nara's word vomit #supergirl #supercorp #lena luthor #kara danvers #fanfiction #femslash #a lil bit of angst mehbeh #have a lil morsel on this fine monday #BUCKLE UP KIDS #LBitR

166 notes · View notes