#i am going to [redacted] i have so many requests i need to fill and im so tired every day i cant | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

holdmecloser-gandydancer · 2 years

Note

Ugh, okay, so there's so many questions from the meta writers question thing that I want to ask, so you don't have to answer all of them lol but 1, 3, 4, 20, and/or 25?

I will say though, I'm very very interested in that band AU that I think you keep referencing working on, tbh idk what the acronym means, but I'm very excited about it 👀

writing asks!

1. Tell us about your current project(s) – what’s it about, how’s progress, what do you love most about it?

I have a few so let me just chat about them all! one is, ofc, something bigger than the sky that I'm working on with Hali (@phantasmagoric-acquaintance)

it's a collaborative work between the two of us that is the content of balance from her perspective in the umbra staff! it's progressing well, we're nearly done and i can't believe it! i just love getting to work with my best friend on something tbh :3

the next one is RHAPAW, my beloved band au. (it stands for rode hard and put away wet and i promise there's a reason for that lsdkfjsdlf). Progress is pretty good! I've got about 5k words of it right now, I know some of the most major plot points, and I have a pretty clear idea of how it's going to end!! Honestly i love Barry in this more than life itself (but I do just love the idea of Lup, Kravitz, and Johann all in a band together too so don't make me choose <3)

(also extra bonus, I am working on extending about three prompt fills I did a while ago so keep an eye out for those)

3. What is that one scene that you’ve always wanted to write but can’t be arsed to write all of the set-up and context it would need? (consider this permission to write it and/or share it anyway)

OKAY I GOT IT i have been thinking about this for like. months. Basically i do have this au idea wherein Taako dies in Wonderland. A version of Arms Outstretched still happens but basically Taako is dead and in the Astral Plane, Magnus is in the mannequin body still, and Merle is still Merle. Barry is there as the red robe, of course. Edward still gets eaten by staff and Merle goes to grab it and tries to cast something and it just Doesn't work. And at this point, Merle is just over it. like "You magic piece of shit, you couldn't save my friend, you won't let me cast, what the hell is the use?" and he just SNAPS it. and it's like a bomb goes off. And Merle's head feels like it's going to explode because there's another red robe? but he can't hear it or see its face and the original red robe is...crying? And Magnus is trying to hug it? and he keeps saying "Merle, holy shit it's [redacted] how could Lucretia just [redacted] like that?"

and it obviously continues but that is the barest bones shit of it.

4. Share a sentence or paragraph from your writing that you’re really proud of (explain why, if you like)

this is so hard because i feel like my content is better than the actual writing itself!! but i guess if i have to pick one i do love the ridiculously unhinged monologue Taako goes on in like, chapter two of flours? (part of it below)

And then your wonderful twin sister might annoyingly keep changing her mind on what flowers she wants on her cake. Mind you, your twin sister might also specifically request that the flowers on the cake be fresh, not made of pulled sugar or gum paste or fondant or frosting, no they just have to be fresh because gods forbid I ever get to do sugar work. And not that there’s anything wrong with fresh flowers, mind you, but it might happen to be something that is just out of your comfort zone. And while you would normally go to Fantasy Costco, you can’t anymore because they hired a really weird cashier who keeps offering to make you deals even though it’s fucking Fantasy Costco and the prices are literally marked so you have to begin to wonder to yourself if that cashier even actually works there.

20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)

i just really like exploring friendships between characters that either just Wouldn't/Didn't/Couldn't happen in the show (AM Radio, Flours, and like, a million prompt fills have been examples of this)

also. I know I referenced this in the tags BUT both vampire twins pieces and the werewolf magnus piece all take place in the same universe (the magnus piece takes place a year or two prior to the vampire twins pieces)

25. What part of writing is the most fun?

okay i already answered this one BUT another really fun part is just finding inspiration in the weirdest of places. like actually now that i think about it, like five of my fics/wips have been inspired by me innocuously listening to music lskdfjsld

#this got. so long oh my god #thank you Gab!!!!#tentatively positive 3 #ask game #asks #rip (reeses in pieces)#long post

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matryosika · 3 years

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How can I be a better writer ? :( @im-sakura

hi baby!

i am not sure if i should be the one answering such an important question, considering that i am still lacking in a lot of aspects, specially grammar and, in general, the english language.

but still, i wish to help you and encourage you even the slightest bit, so i will try to tell you about MY experience writing. take everything with a grain of salt because this is my perspective!

1) first of all, the first thing you need to be a good writer is to have fun with it. have fun thinking about ideas, have fun crafting the characters, hav fun redacting a summary... in general, just have fun. the more fun you have, the more special your writing will become because they are yours.

i started writing on april, a few months ago. at first i had no intention of owning a blog or keep on writing for an audience. all i had was a fantasy and the urge to put it through words.

by doing so, i realized that it was something i enjoyed. back then i was in the middle of the semester, really stressed and filled with college stuff to do. writing, for me, was an escape to all the stress. it was a small space where i could just be with myself, thinking about stuff i like.

that leads me to the second point:

2) don't stress yourself over writing. the moment you start seeing this hobby as something overwhelming or stressful is the moment were things will start to get more and more complicated. a hobby is something that should bring you joy and comfort, not any negative sentiment.

if you write under pressure, or just write for the sake of writing (e.j. for feeling "productive", out of frustration, despair, etc.), your writing most likely won't come out as good as if you wrote them in a better mental and emotional space.

it's okay to have a writer's block, it's okay to be out of ideas, it's okay to not know how to write all the fuzzy thoughts inside of your head, specially if english is not your first language.

3) be a reader. like i mentioned before, i started writing in april, but i actually joined tumblr on november 2020. from november through april, all i did every night was read, read, read. i read mainly smut, which is the genre i write. i learned about new words, new ways of describing stuff, new ways of portraying the characters and scenarios. as i was reading, i started picking on things i like. for example, as a reader, i love reading stuff that has more dialogues than actual descriptions of the stuff. now that i'm a writer, i tend to include a lot of dialogues and i have received good feedback about that. be a reader and spot the things you like (or don't like) and try to implement them on your writing.

4) research. when i am writing, i always have to have three tabs opened: google drive, google translator, and my trustworthy google search bar. i use google drive and google translator because, since i'm not a native english speaker, they both help me with my grammar. as i am writing, i try to not make my sentences any repetitive, so google comes in handy. i tend to search a lot for synonyms or new words to implement into my writings.

5) look for prompt lists. speaking for myself, i am far from being creative. it is one of the things i struggle the most with daily and, at the beginning, i was incredibly worried that my lack of creativity was going to allow me to just write like 2 o 3 drabbles only. however, around tumblr, there are tons of prompt lists or dialogues to fuel your creativity. from fluff, smut, angst, humor, and many other topics you can think of, there are a lot of prompt lists that you can review and get inspired form!

6) listen to your (potential) audience. if you are starting, then i will suggest you to write whatever you feel comfortable with: character wise, themed wise, etc. have fun with it! but, if you really want an audience to stick with you and follow you, start making sure to run polls or ask for feedback/suggestions/requests. of course, state your limits beforehand. if you don't feel comfortable writing about something (or someone), you are in all the right to do so. don't surpass your limits and write whatever you feel comfortable with, but also take into account other people's opinions when it comes to ideas.

7) do not focus on numbers right away. one of the things i think can bring our motivation down are the numbers. am i having enough notes? reblogs? likes? am i getting followers? how many?

i get that these indicators could suggest that you are doing a good job or that people are interested in you, but they could also ruin the motivation and experience as a whole for you.

don't stress too much over them. having a large amount of notes doesn't mean that they are the best writer in town and having little amount of notes doesn't mean that they are completely awful at it. remember that content and general plot play such a big role into getting someone interested in your work so, maybe, those pieces of writing with a lot of notes and traffic managed to get the attention of people not because of the writing itself but because of the idea or content presented.

work on your creativity, daydream, read as much as you can and always try to improve both your grammar (if you suck at it, like me) and vocabulary!

i wish you only the best, and i am so very honored to be able to answer this question. i promise to improve in the future as well.

#fask

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hisunshiine · 3 years

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Escape ✈︎ Chapter 4

✈︎ chapter 4: you have been cordially invited... |✈︎ Escape Series—18+, Mature

✈︎ genre: fluff, future smut

✈︎ word count: 2,736 words

✈︎ pairing: jungkook x [redacted] (at the very end)

✈︎ warnings: alcohol consumption

✈︎ summary: A look into what it's like arriving to Bangtania...

Everyday, since the very beginning when it was announced, you have sat at your computer or been on your phone in order to participate in the giveaway for a chance to go to Bangtania Island. Every week, one lucky person has a chance to win an exclusive invitation from the girls who organized it, all expenses paid for them to relocate out there.

Friday couldn’t have come soon enough; your job was draining. A typical 9-5, doing office work was monotonous and you slogged through the week waiting for your weekends to come. Despite the wish to find something else, nobody was hiring in your city. Not for anything you wanted to do, anyways. Deep in your gut you felt the need for something more, instead of the repetitious clacking of your fingers against the keyboard, answering the phones, and feeling like a machine.

Fortunately, it’s the weekend, so you decide to stop and grab a bottle of wine and make your way home. You’re ready to unwind with some youtube videos and spend time browsing your social media for anything interesting. You pour a glass of wine and relax on the sofa, open your laptop and log in to twitter. You have a few notifications, including an update from the giveaway page, they had posted there was another winner chosen and that the winner would receive an email shortly.

“That was 30 minutes ago!?” You squeal to yourself, an unexplainable feeling creeping over you.

Just then your phone chimes, and you unlock the screen to check your notifications. You have multiple email notifications, so you check your email app as you sip your wine. Scrolling through them, it’s mainly junk mail, you see one that catches your eye.

Sender Name: Bangtania Island Mayor

Subject: You have been cordially invited…

Y/N,

Congratulations! You have been selected as the next lucky winner to be invited to Bangtania Island. In order to accept this invitation, please click on the link and fill out the application. Documents you may need to gather prior to completing the forms in the link are:

Driver’s License

Social Security Card

Passport

Please make sure to include the earliest date for you to travel, and please have your physical completed prior to boarding the plane. All documents needed are attached to the email. Please make sure to electronically sign them and reply to this email with the completed documents. If you have any questions in regards to the forms, please do not hesitate to reach out. Upon completion of all required documents per your reply email, you will receive your e-ticket for travel.

The following are the guidelines and stipulations for traveling to Bangtania Island:

You will receive a one-way ticket, free of cost. You will be picked up from the airport and transported to the boat, which will bring you to the island. You will be given a limited amount of time to decide if you would like to stay as a permanent resident of Bangtania, approximately 2 weeks. Prior to you being granted full access to the island, you will meet with the Deputy Mayor who will greet you at the dock, completing a brief in-person interview. If you decide to leave or prove unfit for the island at that time, a complimentary ticket home will be provided to you up until the 2-week window.

Thank you,

Vanessa

Deputy Mayor of the Mayor’s Office, Bangtania Island

You couldn’t stop yourself from spilling some wine as you low-key panicked. You knew there was a very good possibility of being chosen; some of your mutuals on twitter had already left to go there, and while you had seen them briefly on the TL, it was never for long and they didn’t say anything other than that they were enjoying themselves immensely and to share the sweepstakes link.

You set down what was left of your wine that hadn’t spilt into your lap, and ran around your room, pulling clothes off of their hangers and out of your dresser drawers before you remembered you hadn’t even clicked the link to complete the forms.

Pausing in the middle of your bedroom, arms filled with random clothes, you took 7 deep breaths to try and calm down before dropping your handful of clothes into your pen and waiting suitcase. Sitting back down, you calmly clicked the link and once transported to the secure website, you filled in the information needed so that your flight could be purchased for you as well as any other accommodations you may need could be handled by the ones in charge.

You printed out the forms needed for the physical, jotted down some notes to go to the doctor on Monday to complete the form, and decided that the earliest you would be able to fly out was Wednesday. That gives you enough time to go to your job, request use of your vacation hours for the next 2 weeks, and turn in your two week notice. You didn’t ever want to come back to that shit hole.

You celebrated the news by turning up your bluetooth speaker and blasting your favorite upbeat BTS songs while you packed up everything you would need. Hasta La Vista!

Catching your flight was easier than you thought it would be, as you had an upgraded flight in first class. You were given star treatment, access to a separate waiting area with complimentary food and drinks, less people to deal with, comfortable seats, the works. You couldn’t believe that ARMY was able to provide all of this for you, but who were you to complain?

The boat ride was also nice, more like taking a large yacht across the water to the island, you stood at the bough of the boat for most of the trip, enjoying the view as you became farther and farther away from everything that was shitty about your life and closer to everything you wanted. An escape into a world that was full of other people who were like you, liked the same music, had the same mindset, and you got to do it all on a paradise island? Hell fucking yeah.

After docking, you rolled your luggage behind you as you disembarked from the ramp, and saw a girl waiting for you. She was short but cute, a friendly smile and aura of being in charge. Her cheeks were slightly sunburnt, but you were envious of the way she looked refreshed, skin glowing. You couldn’t wait for that to be you; sunkissed and relaxed from the ocean breeze and too many margaritas.

“Y/n?” She asked, and you nodded.

“Welcome! I’m Vanessa, I hope that your trip went well?”

“Oh yea, it was awesome, thank you!”

“No problem, congratulations on winning! So before we go off to the fun stuff, we have a brief interview and a few more things to go over, and then I’ll give you a tour of the island and show you to your place. If you’ll follow me?”

Vanessa led the way to a golf cart and you climbed on, your luggage secured in the back seat of the cart. She turned the key, and you were speeding off towards a large house. It was painted white with accents of brick, and green ivy climbing lattices. The windows were large and beautiful, and you felt like you had seen them somewhere before. Like they were in a magazine or some type of professional photos or something. You shrugged off the feeling of deja vu, and followed Vanessa into the house.

The windows were open and provided a good amount of sunlight into the entryway, and you tried to take in as much as you could see as Vanessa walked past a staircase and led you towards the back of the house and into a side room. It was an office, with bright white walls and a large sturdy desk. A bookshelf was the entire wall behind the desk, where she now sat at.

She gestured to the plush chair in front of her desk and you sat down, suddenly nervous. For such a large house, it was pretty quiet, and you wondered where all the other people were. Was this actually all an elaborate trick to sell you into sex trafficking and you were brought here to die?!

You calmed your thoughts once you heard laughter from somewhere above you, and music playing lightly from another area of the house.

“So, once again, welcome! I am the deputy mayor here, and basically in charge of getting you all settled. We are a formal nation, Bangtania, with a president, a whole government system, and we’re working on expanding the businesses here. Before I can reveal anything more to you, I do need to have you sign the Non-Disclosure Agreement here in person. I know that I sent it to you via email for you to read and electronically sign, but I like to cover all of my bases.”

Like clockwork, another woman walked into the open office door, carrying a glass of wine and some papers. She took a sip and handed the papers to Vanessa, who thanked her as she headed back out of the room. The woman blew a kiss and disappeared around the corner.

“That’s my best friend, Talia, and definitely the reason that all of this was even put into motion,” Vanessa said as she shuffled the papers before straightening them gently by tapping the edges on the desk. She stapled the corner, binding the papers together, and passed it over to you.

“I know you read over most of this, but I want to reiterate a few points anyways. From the moment you leave this office, you are not to share with anyone about the other people on this island. When you first applied to the giveaway sweepstakes, you gave us your social media handles. While we won’t take away social media from you, your posts will be monitored for identifying certain people who wish to remain anonymous while here. Please always ask anyone before posting and triple check photos as well.”

She points to a section and you initial, stating you understand.

“You have a two week period here to see how you like it. You don’t have to stay if you do not want to. After that time, you will be issued a passport for Bangtania, a resident ID, and be included in our census. You will have dual citizenship for here and for your home country as well.”

“If you choose to leave within the 2 week window, it’s no charge. If you choose to leave after, you will have to fund your flight home yourself. We will pay for your boat ride back to the mainland, and from there you can negotiate work or if you have money saved just in case, you can fly out. Also, if you choose to stay, you can always fly out to visit friends and family, just remember the NDA is always in affect.”

You initialed again.

Vanessa led you through a few more sections of the contract, and you learned that a few of the girls on the island were nurses and so if you were sick or needed minor medical attention, they would help you. Everything else was pretty much provided to you, and all they asked was that they could use your skills in return.

You weren’t surprised they knew you had skills with computers and answering phones, which made you a perfect candidate to work in the main house under Vanessa doing secretarial work for her best friend, Talia. It wouldn’t be a lot of work, you would have plenty of time to enjoy the beach and rest, and the work would be related to the giveaway, running the island, and other fun BTS related things, so you were excited.

Signing your last signature on the bottom of the last page, Vanessa took the document, notarized it, and put it away in a locked filing cabinet next to her desk.

“Now, if you’re ready, I’d love to give you a tour of the island and show you where you’ll be staying.”

After seeing the main areas that people hung out at, you went towards what looked like a restaurant, which was good because you were hungry. Vanessa parked the golf cart next to a few others, and she held the door open for you.

You almost fainted. Seated at the table right when you walked in was none other than the 7 boys that were the reason you lived. BTS. Namjoon, Jimin, Yoongi, Taehyung, and Jungkook were sat at the table, and as you looked around, you saw that in between them sat other girls, including mutuals you knew were living here. Hobi appeared from swinging doors that led to what you assumed was the kitchen, delivering plates of food from a platter as a few girls followed him as well with drinks.

“C’mon Y/N, don’t be shy. Isn’t this what you wanted?” Vanessa laughed, taking in your shocked expression.

After eating, and sharing some conversation with Jin and Yoongi, you were ready for a nap. Jin was an exceptional cook, and you were full to the brim. Vanessa waved bye to everyone, a lingering hand on a certain male’s shoulder as she walked away, leading you back outside. As you sat back on the leather seat of the cart, she checked in with you.

“I’m definitely still in shock, but now I understand the NDA a lot more.” You chuckled as she drove you towards another house. It was just as big as the main house, as you heard several people call it, but the style was more relaxed and upon entering it, you realized it was because it was lived in. It was two stories, with a large open concept downstairs with a living room and kitchen, and rooms upstairs. You dragged your suitcase up the flight and Vanessa unlocked a room for you with a key before handing it to you.

“This is our newcomer guest room. We will have a room ready for you after your 2 weeks are up, if you decide to stay. For now, most people have said staying with me and Talia has been helpful if they had questions or needed anything, but any of the girls will help you, everyone is super nice.”

You looked around the room; it was spacious with a nice big bay window that allowed a decent amount of sunlight in.

“I’ll leave you to get settled in. Feel free to explore some more, and tomorrow we will have our weekly game night so you can meet everyone in a more relaxed setting and have fun. It’s our way of welcoming you to Bangtania.”

Vanessa let herself out of the room, closing the door softly. You wanted to explore, but at the moment the bed was calling to you. You lay down in the spot where the sun was pooling, curling yourself into the warmth and passed out. Jet Lag was a bitch.

When you finally rejoined the waking world, it was definitely not waking hours. The sun had set, and you shiver, the ocean breeze now too cool in your bedroom. You get up, throwing a MOTS tour hoodie on, and climb back in the bed, attempting to go back to sleep. Tossing and turning for about 15 minutes, sleep evades you. You must have caught up on all of your missing sleep with that ‘nap’ you took. Like you said, Jet lag is a bitch. Not wanting to continue to lay there restless, you slip out of the room and down the stairs.

You walk along the road, past other houses, finding yourself walking into sand. Sitting on the beach, enjoying the sound of the waves, you finally begin to feel tired. Rather than fall asleep on the beach, you make your way back to the house.

You head up the stairs and start down the hall, being as quiet as possible since it’s late and everyone is asleep. At least you assume they are all asleep, until you hear a very familiar voice coming from Vanessa’s room.

“Come here Princess, why are you acting this way?” You step closer to the door that is slightly ajar. You can’t believe what you are seeing, but you can’t stop watching either.

#hisunshiine #hisunshiine writings #hisunshiinewritings #bts fic #bts fanfiction #bts au #bts story #bangtansorciere #bangtanuniversity #bangtanwhq #bangtaninn #mrsparkjimin18 #Escape Series #Escape #Escape BTS #BTS Escape Series #ot7 x reader

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ohpretty-baby · 4 years

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Hiiiii 💕 could I request 2 and 12 for the drabble game with jin?? :)

seokjin: 2. “can you picture it? me and you? together?” + 12. “stay with me tonight.”

hi i went kinda overboard bc i got so excited to have a seokjin request ahdjfhsfsh thank you dear <333 hope you enjoy! (drabble requests are still open!)

959 words

seokjin never really asks much of you.

in fact, you ask a lot out of him.

whether it’s helping you carry something heavy into your flat, or helping you with the heavy emotional baggage you have, seokjin is always there to help. so far, he’s been the nicest next door neighbor you’ve ever met, constantly at your door to ask if you’re okay or if you need help with anything, because in the short time he’s gotten to know you, he’s already been able to read you like a book.

he’s become something similar to an oasis. someone you can come to in a time of crisis, who absolutely will not fight your issues for you, but will help you sort out everything so that you’re able to actually solve it yourself. when in his company, you find yourself at peace immediately, and you’re able to talk things through and clear your head before you return to the real world and you have to confront your problems.

more often than not, you feel incredibly guilty when you ask him to come over for a cup of tea—which basically meant that you’d spill out all of your emotions to him in a 2-hour time period (or longer, if time permits it).

you constantly apologize to him and he’ll always flick your forehead, telling you to quit being sorry and to keep filling him in on all of the details about your life.

surprisingly enough, seokjin has been the only one who’s actually cared about the things you say.

everytime you got your heart broken, seokjin was there to clean up the pieces. now that you had become close friends, he had a tub of your favorite ice cream waiting for you whenever you needed it.

on the common occurrence of you getting played by yet another guy, seokjin would give you advice while you sob over your ice cream, eating straight out of the tub. you’d agree to his words, vowing you wouldn’t get your heart broken ever again.

but then the next week you’d show up at his door again, with watery eyes and tear stained cheeks.

however, this cycle had seemed to break soon, because you thought you had finally found a guy who wouldn’t disappoint you.

jihun was a humorous boy who made sure that you never had a boring time with him. you had gone on multiple dates with him and you spent many nights on the phone with him, talking about whatever came to your mind. he was a lot more reckless for your liking, but you didn’t really seem to mind.

the only thing that slightly bothered you, though, is that he demanded a lot of time out of you. so much so that soon enough your world was basically revolving around him and you couldn’t remember the last time you hung out with your dear friend. you hadn’t heard from seokjin in a while, actually, which worried you a lot.

it isn’t until jihun calls you at 12 AM, asking you to come over, that seokjin finally decides to confront you.

you’re about to walk past seokjin’s door to leave the apartment building, when you hear his door creak open and suddenly you’re getting pulled by your arm. you find yourself pinned against seokjin’s door, and he’s mere inches away from your face. he looks upset, but you can’t tell why.

“where are you going?” his soft tone is a shocking juxtaposition to his aggressive demeanor.

“oh, um,” you gulp, “jihun-“

seokjin groans, resting his head on your right shoulder. you freeze, unsure of what’s going on. he fixes his position so that he’s face to face with you and you finally get the chance to really soak in his appearance. there’s a faint scent of alcohol when his breath fans your face, and his half-lidded eyes reveal that he’s tipsy enough where he’s lost his concern about saving face but not to the point where he can’t control himself.

he looks exhausted. you frown. what was bothering him so much that he lost sleep over it?

“y/n, stay with me tonight, please,” he practically begs.

it’s the first time he’s ever asked something out of you, so it must be urgent. you nod, and you watch as he takes a deep sigh.

“do you know how much you irritate me?”

“w-what-“

“having to hear you laugh so sweetly on the phone next to that jackass,” he grumbles, “you do know how thin these walls are, right?”

“seokjin-“

“and you’re so fucking oblivious, y/n!” he raises his voice, running a hand through his hair and tugging at the strands clumped together between his fingers, “how do you not see? really… you’re something else.”

“what do i not see?”

“that i…” he seems to have sobered up a little. his eyes widen slightly, signalling that he isn’t thinking before speaking, but he’s gone too far to redact anything. seokjin tries to figure out if he can retreat now or if he should take a risk.

“that you…?”

“that i’m in love with you, y/n.”

all of a sudden, a makeshift montage of you and seokjin flashes through your mind.

you think of all the times you’ve fallen asleep in his arms, and how gently he holds you. sometimes, when you’re almost asleep, you feel seokjin plant a small kiss on your head, whispering something to himself. you think about how comfortable you are around him, how he’s so sweet that you always feel warm around him.

your heart flutters under his gaze, and you’re stunned at the sudden realization of your true feelings for your neighbor.

seokjin’s become a lot more timid now after hearing himself confess to you.

“can you picture it?” he gulps, “me and you? together?”

you don’t say anything, standing on your tiptoes to close the space between you two and letting your lips speak for you instead.

#kim seokjin drabble #bts drabble #bts fluff #seokjin drabble #seokjin fluff #bts seokjin fluff #seokjin fanfic #bts seokjin drabble #bts fanfic #baby drabbles <3

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belost-the-watcher · 3 years

Text

The Serra Ion Tracker Assassin Pistol (TAP) Special

Belost is a specialist and as such has needs that many soldiers do not. This makes it to where he has to make special requests now and then. Sometimes it means he works directly with Galra R&D but other times he needs to outsource to the free market. When he needs to reach outside the military he prefers to use Merrick Prime based businesses and one of the most prominent armor and weapon manufacturers on Merrick Prime is Serra Ion.

Serra Ion Research and Development Lab

Project Hush

Development Log 1

We got a special order in today from the Galra Army. Specifically from Warrant Officer 5 Belost Windor of the Galra Army Trackers. The order is for a quiet sidearm that fires slugs instead of the usual energy weaponry they outfit their troops with. Usual Army requirements as well: Durable, reliable, simple.

Mr. Windor left us with three bullets he uses in his other sidearm. He told us it was an experimental weapon for the Raiders that never made it through trials but I’d bet we could find a market for it. Note: Ask Officer Windor to inspect his weapon after all of this is over.

Anyway the bullets are largely impractical for this project thanks to their high explosive bullets. But it does give me an ideas for bullets of our own. Half the issue with this project will be developing the ammunition to be fired from the Hush.

Will begin drawing designs.

Development Log 2

Our progress has been steady. Copying the build of Windor’s current sidearm will be undoable for our specifications. The gap between its ammunition cylinder and the barrel allows for too much gas to escape and makes noise suppression impossible. To create a proper gas seal we have modified a frame from one of our energy weapons to build off of. Rather than a battery pack we will have a magazine to feed ammunition. As for extraction we are attempting to use the gas that would normally bleed out of the cylinder gap of Windor’s sidearm to push the round out from a port. Either that or development of caseless ammunition.

Once the issue of extraction is solved we can move on to the prototyping phase.

Development Log 3

We finally have some progress to show with our first prototype.

Caseless ammunition was far too impractical to develop. We have instead used the energy of the case going off to cycle a slide set into our energy pistol’s frame. We have only run into problems so far with inconsistency in our ammunition. Reliability should improve as we fine tune our ammunition loads. As for noise suppression we have developed a very simple attachable expansion chamber that screws onto the end of the Hush’s barrel.

Compared to the weapon brought to us by Officer Windor and other energy weapons the noise level is very good. The development team has settled on a relatively small bullet compared to the ones brought in to us. The small size allows for high acceleration and very good armor penetration that has gone clean through test armor.

The first round of test trials will begin shortly.

Tracker Stealth Pistol Test Trial 1 Results

[MKC Industries Popper] Fail

[Galra Empire Supply XP01] Fail

[Serra Ion Industries Hush] Fail

Development Log 4

The Hush was marked as a failure for the test trials. But not all is bad news. Reliability was incredibly high. Our recoil operation system seems perfectly suited for this platform. The marks for the Hush’s failure were due to excess length, bad ergonomics, excess weight, and insufficient noise suppression. This will require some brainstorming. But we will press on.

Development Log 5

We have made some adjustments to our prototype and now the Hush 002 is here.

Ergonomics should be much better with a slimmed down grip and the addition of custom grip scales to help fill out the hand. Overall length has been shortened which has had quite a nice effect on the weight especially if the expansion chamber is removed. One of the issues we had not considered regarding noise suppression was the speed of the bullet. The same speed that gave our small slugs such good penetration also caused them to break the sound barrier and create a sonic boom. So in a seemingly inverse of logic we have found that the weapon is much more silent by moving to a larger, heavier bullet.

The second round of trials will be starting soon and we feel much more confident in this design.

Tracker Stealth Pistol Test Trial 2 Results

[MKC Industries Popper MK2] Fail

[Galra Empire Supply XP02] Fail

[Serra Ion Industries Hush 002] Fail

Development Log 6

Another trial and another fail. But this time the trials were much more rigorous. Failure reasons listed were due to excess length, excess weight, and insufficient noise suppression. Ergonomics were not a fail but Officer Windor did cut his hand on the rear sight when the slide became too slick to operate when covered in mud. So ergonomics will continue to be an improvement point as well. Unfortunately we could not convince Mr. Windor to count the weight and length of the Hush with its expansion chamber removed because, “There’s no way I would have enough time to screw that onto the end and shoot somebody quickly. If I’m not carrying it separately then I’m not counting it separately.”

Development Log 7

With the news that length and weight cannot be counted separate from the expansion chamber we have, in a stroke of genius if I may say so, made it integral to the Hush itself. This has had the effect of cutting down on overall length and weight but keeping the barrel and expansion chamber the same length. Not only that but it has registered as being even quieter with some small adjustments to the ammunition.

Our ergonomics team is working on some final touches that they promise will improve the weight further and feel much better in the hand.

Development Log 8

We could not be happier with the Hush 003.

The ergonomics team did great work with a redesign of the hammer and trigger. A flare at the back of the grip will help prevent the user’s hand from slipping up beneath the slide when it comes back after a shot. Cuts were made at the front and back of the slide to give better grip should the weapon get mud or water on it. The slide has become taller to allow for the expansion chamber’s addition but we have added that mass lower down to prevent it from becoming too tall.

Last but certainly not least is the addition of a slide lock. Further testing has shown that much of the noise was now coming from the slide cycling the next bullet into the chamber. By locking the slide we are able to cut down on even more noise and make it, for all intents and purposes, completely silent.

If this doesn’t make them happy then I don’t know what will.

Tracker Stealth Pistol Test Trial 3 Results

[MKC Industries Popper MK3] Fail

[Galra Empire Supply XP03] Fail

[Serra Ion Industries Hush 003] Pass

Development Log 9

Officer Windor brought in some representatives from the Galra Army for the final trials. There were even some from the Navy and Galra High Command. Apparently there was more interest in a silent slug shooter than we thought. The Hush 003 excelled in the trials and Serra Ion has officially been awarded a contract for [REDACTED] units.

It was more effort than we would usually put in for an order of this size but the amount of breakthroughs we have had as a result have been worth the price alone. I am sure management is happy with the contract, though.

I drew up a comparison of how far we have come in development between prototypes:

We made a few small adjustments that were specifically requested such as serrations on the hammer and trigger guard for a little extra control, a rail for an infrared flashlight to work with night vision goggles, and sized up the internal expansion chamber for better unlocked suppression.

We earned our bonuses on this one. The Hush, or I guess I should now say the Tracker Assassin Pistol (TAP), was a resounding success.

Now to get a closer look at Officer Windor’s sidearm....

#artwork #tap #tracker assassin pistol #drabble

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the-casual-reply · 4 years

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Unmasking: Living with Autism in a Neurotypical World

The following is an original oratory I wrote and performed at my school speech contest! I am very proud of it so I thought I would share. This was written to be performed to a largely NT audience, so don’t be surprised when it assumes that you (the reader) are NT. My main motivation for writing this was raising awareness and partially out of frustration at the societal lack of knowledge about autism. (Fyi it’s like 5 pages long sorry gamers)

My name is Chloe [redacted] and I am autistic. This term is highly stigmatized, and for my entire life I’ve heard it used in mostly negative connotations. It has taken me a long time to even feel comfortable saying that I am autistic because I fear being judged and stereotyped. Today I am here to teach you that autism is not scary nor is it a bad thing, but it can make life difficult in a world made by and for neurotypical people, and I’m here to teach you what you need to know to be an ally and a friend for an autistic person.

When I was diagnosed with autism around a year ago, I was devastated. Everything I thought I knew about myself had suddenly been taken away from me. I felt like all the achievements, experiences, and feelings of my past self were stripped from me, and I didn’t know what to do. So, I decided to do some research. And as I learned more and more, I slowly reclaimed my identity. All these things that had previously confused me were suddenly explained, and as I noticed more and more autistic traits within myself, I learned not to be afraid or ashamed of them, but to embrace them as a part of myself.

Many who are reading this right now may wonder how this applies to you. Many of you probably don’t know an autistic person, or so you think. Here’s why it should matter: about one in sixty people has been diagnosed as autistic. That means, statistically, you interact with an autistic person about every other day, and that’s not considering those who go undiagnosed. That means that every other day, you impact the life of an autistic person, and they impact your life. Many people will hear that and wonder if it truly matters that the person you may be interacting with is autistic.

And I, as an autistic person, am here to tell you that it does matter. Autism affects every single aspect of a person’s life. It affects their sensory needs, their ability to communicate, their problem solving strategies, their performance in school or at work, their social needs, and countless other aspects of their identity. Many people with autism experience high levels of social anxiety due to trends of ostracism or exclusion throughout their lives. Because of this, a seemingly trivial interaction may greatly affect an autistic person in a different way than it would for an allistic (not autistic) person. Every day, autistic people are put into stressful and draining situations, where they often don’t have anyone to help them. So, today I want to help educate more people on what autism is, what it does, and how you can help positively change the life of an autistic person.

The most noticeable difference between allistic and autistic people is that autistic people are much more sensitive to sensory input. A setting that may be normal to an allistic person may be extremely overwhelming to an autistic person. For example, bright or flashing lights, strong scents, overlapping or loud noises, and unpleasant textures or tastes are common sources of uneasiness or distress for us.

On top of physical overstimulation, many autistic people also struggle with emotional overstimulation. Many autistic people absorb the moods of the people we spend time with due to our hypersensitivity to their feelings, and we experience emotions to a much stronger extent than allistic people usually do.

When an autistic person experiences intense feelings such as happiness or anxiety, they use a coping mechanism called ‘stimming’. Stim is short for ‘self-stimulatory behavior’ and it refers to a repeated motion or action that dispels energy that is being absorbed by the person due to their surroundings. My favorite stims are hand flapping, repeated blinking, contortion of the face, spinning, and repeating verbally satisfying words or sounds. By stimming, I can dispel some of the high levels of energy or strong emotions caused by my surroundings.

Stimming is essential to the health and wellbeing of autistic people. But it can also be dangerous. Autistic people risk being judged, bullied, ostracized, abused, and even arrested when stimming in public. Because stimming and other signs of overstimulation are similar to signs exhibited by those who are under the influence of drugs or alcohol, it is not uncommon for autistic people to be arrested or harassed by police officers for stimming in public.

For me, this is alarming. In a world where we pride ourselves on being inclusive and forward-thinking, it is still dangerous to simply be autistic in public. To me, the most important way to make the world safer for people with autism is to spread awareness for their experiences, and for actually autistic people to be the ones sharing their stories. For too long, the stereotype of the autistic person who cannot stand up for themself has been perpetuated and widely accepted. So today I’m challenging that stereotype, and I’m here to tell you some things that autistic people wish more allistic people knew about autism.

Autistic people tend to be very blunt and straightforward regarding their thoughts and feelings. To allistic people, whose interactions are filled with flowery language to avoid being upfront and honest, this is seen as impolite. So, understand that if an autistic person unexpectedly says something frank and direct that comes off as rude, they are likely just honestly saying what they’re thinking, which is what they expect you want to hear.

And to autistic people, the way that allistic people communicate can seem just as nonsensical. It can be hard for us to detect sarcasm, understand non-literal figures of speech, and interpret body language. So, when communicating with autistic people, be mindful of the fact that they may struggle to understand you. If you say something and they don’t understand what you mean right away, don’t become exasperated or treat them like their need for clarification is a burden. Calmly and nonjudgmentally explain what you said, and if they don’t need any further clarification, move on with the conversation as usual.

On top of this, autistic people struggle to understand implied meanings. So, try to be open about your feelings and intentions. If you want an autistic person to complete a task, you should tell them exactly what you want them to do without excluding anything you think is implied. Especially don’t become frustrated or angry if an autistic person doesn’t infer something that you didn’t explicitly say. Autistic brains form conclusions by looking at little, individual clues and then piecing them together to create a model of what they should do, as opposed to the allistic method of forming a model and then filling in the blanks. This is another prominent difference between allistic and autistic brains.

Autistic people’s brains are wired to rely on routine much more than allistic people due to the way that they analyze situations. Many autistic people rely on routines to find a sense of security within their lives because of how they analyze situations. So, a sudden change in schedule can be very upsetting and anxiety inducing for an autistic person. When planning a get-together or party involving an autistic friend or family member, remember to try to give them extra notice of any changes in plans in order to help reduce any worry they may be feeling.

Because of our processing style, autistic brains require more time to process new requests and instructions than allistic brains. When an autistic person is asked to do something outside of their regular schedule or what they are usually expected to do, it may be hard for them to process at first. So, if you ask an autistic person to do something for you, they may not do it immediately. Do not berate them for this, as this would likely lead to them becoming unnecessarily stressed. Allow them extra time to process your instructions, answer any questions they may have, and be patient.

Another essential thing to understand about autism is sensory overload. As I mentioned earlier, autistic people regularly face negative sensory experiences that can become overwhelming to them. This can lead to them becoming tired and irritable, and it can interfere with their ability to communicate and function normally. When an autistic person becomes so overwhelmed that stimming cannot regulate their sensory input, they may experience a shutdown or meltdown. A shutdown is characterized by minimal or complete lack of speech, extreme sensitivity to touch and sound, inability to move, and seclusion into a space where one can be alone. A meltdown is characterized by a temporary lack of control over one’s behavior resulting in yelling, crying, and physically lashing out. Both of these are the autistic brains reactions to extremely overwhelming circumstances. Autistic people cannot choose to meltdown or shutdown, and in turn, cannot choose to stop a meltdown or shutdown that has already started.

So, it’s important to understand each individual person and what they need from you. Talk to your autistic friend or family member about circumstances that they find to be most upsetting, and actively find ways to avoid them, or if that’s not possible, warn them of the potentially stressful situation before you enter it. If you are ever with an autistic person during a shutdown or meltdown, the most important thing for you to do for them is to take them away from what is upsetting to them. Take them to a quiet, dark room, and stay with them until they have calmed down. Find a way for them to be able to communicate their needs to you, such as typing or writing, to make sure that they feel safe and comfortable.

Really, what I am asking you to do is to be a better person for the sake of not only yourself, but also the people around you, autistic or not. Be kind. Be caring. Be empathetic, understanding, and aware of how you affect those around you. In order to be an ally to those with autism, first one must learn how to be an ally to those without it.

#autism #actually autistic #autism awareness #autistic teen #autistic student #neurodivergency #neurodivergent #living with autism #autistic pride #autistic feels #autistic things #autistic struggles

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lockdownuk · 4 years

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Lockdown Diary Part 1

A personal account during the lockdown in the UK due to the Covid-19 outbreak.

23/03/2020 8:30pm Boris Johnson, UK Prime Minister, gives a live address to the nation to, effectively, put the country on lockdown to stem the spread of the deadly coronavirus strain, Covid-19.

Many of us have been self-isolating for days but this latest development within the UK in reaction to the pandemic feels very serious and very scary. I decided to keep a simple diary and where better but online.

Day 1: Last night Boris called it, today we’re doing it. I had started working from home (wfh) yesterday as had most people at my work (RCI)..last week I had been preparing laptops as fast as poss for everyone. Even just today, the idea of going into work seems alien and dangerous. Now lockdown (ld) means that it would soon be illegal to do so unless utterly necessary.

Online, FaceBook (fb) especially, is awash with reaction…a lot of calling out people who are out and about in greater numbers than 2, which is against ld rules.

Day 2: Just trying to let work occupy my thoughts and time which is easy enough ‘cos everyone I support (IT engineer) is new to wfh and is having teething problems with all the new laptops. Meanwhile, I keep abreast of comings and goings online…actually socially interacting more than I might otherwise, weirdly

Day 3: Highlight of the day is an online quiz organised by a chap called Jay Flynn on fb…a bunch of us took it as individuals while chatting on Messenger while Jay streamed quiz over fb live and YouTube. It was a good crack and I had two cans of Coors Light which got me pissed!

Day 4: Work is still mad - so many people with IT issues wfh…it’s challenging trying resolve all these probelms remotely but I am rising to it. I actually enjoy it. It satisfies my want for problem-solving.

The ld is in full swing but it’s very early days. The news is dominated, obviously, by Covid-19 and the ever changing stats of infections and deaths. Today, for example, the USA took over, from China, as the country with the most infections. I know there will be an end to all this and I am determined to be there, going out, getting pissed down the pub, gigging, shaking hands with my mates, hugging anyone and everyone who’ll let me - it’ll be a proper party. But I am filled with a dread that it’s going to be a fucking long time coming.

This evening was spent virtually with Foggy, Ham and Andy P…doing a quiz - a rehearsal for Foggy in the hope of doing one to a wider audience next week. It was good fun and great to have a few beers chatting with everyone, Later I video called Fog and we drank ‘til gone midnight, putting the world to rights. I was well pissed.

Day 5: First non-work day of the ld. Housework, daily walk, out for supplies (drop a script order off…queuing outside boots for 15 minues!, bread, baccy and booze). This evening, I’m listening to the next album in NME list of 1985 albums I’m working through - Grace Jones Slave to the Rhythm…fucking pain in the arse ‘cos it’s not on Spotify so I am searching for each song, in order, on YouTube. Plus eating and drinking, of course. Quick video chat with karen and Grace, Dan in the background. I wanted a tin of kidney beans for chilli but Karen hasn’t got one ffs. Burger it is. They are all playing scrabble - I’d love to join in…

Day 6: A quiet day…housework, cooking, daily walk. Highlight was a half hour chinwag with dad who, as I would expect, despite his 84 years, is coping and doing just fine. Most other people with a dad that age would have, on top of their own concerns, something more to worry about during this crisis….for me, it feels like I’ve got someone to turn to, should I need to.

Day 7: Work is starting to feel more routine but it’s a long way off being in the office, which is never routine anyway. That may seem surprising since I do IT support but it’s a varied role, especially at the modern dinosaur of an organisation that is RCI. I try to be as disciplined as possible but I miss not dressing for work, not driving to work, not needing to actually prepare lunch (until lunchtime). I don’t actually need to shower every morning. I don’t think I have to ordinarily but do because I’m mixing with others in the office. I certainly don;t need to now. I only mix with me, so showering becomes a chore but I’m doing it every other morning in the name of the aforementioned discipline. I am worried how long RCI can keep going before laying staff off. I dread being out of work full stop, let alone during this ld, or even thereafter. I think the economies of the world will need time to recover so finding work will be tough à la 2008. I think, if lay-offs were to occur, I’d be in real danger. Last in first out and all that. But, I’ll cross that bridge if and when I come to it.

Day 8: At work there was a large online meeting whereby the MD told us that RCI are going to furlough some staff. The UK, and Ireland staff will be consulted this coming Thursday and Friday (it’s Tuesday today). I shall be reading up on what the furlough arrangements are in the UK due to Covid-19. I know the government have set aside some money, I need to know what I might get paid and how to claim it. In the past, when I’ve been out of work, I’ve been entitled to jack shit other than JSA, This time around, should I be laid off as I expect, I might not have to eat into my savings, fingers crossed. Meanwhile, I have decided to knock up another blog with a photo of myself each day of the ld (from now on) - it’s a sister to this diary.

Day 9: Actually typing this on day 10. Yesterday was a strange day as I contemplate being furloughed (hope for the best, expect the worst)…I’d be paid 80% of my wage according to what the government have said to assist in the Covid-19 crisis…so, were that to be true, I’d be OK money-wise, although still earning way less than I want to prepared for retirement (I am currently still waiting for feedback on a pay increase request I put in at work last year!) I’m more worried about how I would fill my day if I wasn’t working. So, that being said, I flopped and moped about all yesterday evening after my daily walk and, without achieving much at all, didn’t find time to write this entry on the right day…so maybe I can fill my days without much effort!

Day 10: I was furloughed today, starting 5pm tomorrow (Friday 3rd April) and it’s fucked me off. I know it’s not personal but, actually, do I? They’re cutting back the Kettering Desktop team by one, redacted It seems obvious to do this by the ‘last in, first out’ maxim but what about money? others are on more than me (redacted). What about offering it voluntarily - others might go for 80% pay for fuck all - others have family at home to occupy the day (redacted) . A little bit of me thinks it might be preferable furlough me (redacted) …others seems to be a favourite and that annoys me. It annoys me because I think I shoot myself in the foot too often. I’m too vocal about some of the (redacted) decisions and practices at work, plus other reasons that I know but can’t be bothered to type. But, my point, is I don’t play the politically correct, corporate game and therefore forget to look out for my own best interests. FUCK.

So, as of tomorrrow evening, I’ve no work to do. The challenge will be to find a way to occupy my day. I’ve already registered to volunteer for the NHS during the ld…let’s see what becomes of that. And I’ve signed up for web development course. I’m going to get fucking pissed this w/e, starting early tomorrow evening.

Day 11: It’s day 12 as I am writing this entry…that might tell any reader, and remind me, that I did as I promised and got pretty drunk. I spent the day geting my work affairs in order i.e. clearing down support tickets assigned to me. I did a good job, nothing left to handover to the remaining team (Jim, Cristina and Mark) and onky one ticket put into the assigned pool. Some nice converstaions were had with associates, many of whom are, too, being furloughed. Nice words were said and Jim and Mark both were supportive in conversations and messages - they both know I don’t wnat this and, I think, they are both relieved it’s not happening to them. 5 pm arrives and I shutdown my work laptop for the last time for at least 12 weeks. After my daily walk, I video chat with Karen, crack open a beer, make Chinese chicken curry (fucking loads, fucking tasty), finish watching The National Theatre stream of One Man, Two Guvnors (really good, see twoinchreview) and the caught up with, and talked bollocks with Andy, Marc and Ham - we tried getting Rog in on it, no dice. I then watched The Heat (I fucking love that film), ate some more, smoked several single-skinners, drank, in total, three cans, seven bottles. I went to bed shortly after 4am. I felt resigned to my furlough and pleasantly wasted.

Day 12: A subdued day…didn’t wake until gone 1:30pm. Jaded but not really suffering. Mooched about, social media, listening to music, watching telly, farting about on the iPad. My daily walk, over the last fews days, has taken a twist…I am trying to run parts of it. Mainly short distances, 80-100m (I estimate) three, maybe four times. It’s fucking knackering me out. I used to run everywhere when I was a teen. Attempting to run now just makes me feel fucking old. Well, I am, so that’s about right.

Day 13: Another day like yesterday except I got up at 10:30 and didn’t feel jaded. The subdued feeling comes from the realsiation that the ld isn’t being treated as seriously as it should be across the board. The news and even posts by locals on FB (Oundle chatter group) suggest groups still meeting up. The weather this w/e has been a factor - 17°c today. I think a total ld will be enforced soon and that would fuck me off. My daily walk is pretty essential for me nowadays not least for the ‘good for your soul’ benefits that dad has always mentioned. Even today’s walk saw a car parked at the gates to the field on the way to Ashton and people on a blanket soaking up the sun, dogs off their leads and people (looked like a family) playing footy on South Road field. Individually they are not presenting any danger, what with the fact they are either living together or far away from others. But they are flaunting the rules and the more that happens the less likely they’ll carry on getting away with it, which will mean total ld for all! I finished the 50 1985 albums today. It mostly confirms to me that I only listened to two albums released that year (Kate Bush, The Waterboys) any other vinyl I spun would have already been in my collection pre-85.

The sausage casserole I made for tea was fucking lush - 4 birdeye chillies. I saw and spoke with Dan and Grace this morning, they were just coming back from a walk. I am pleased to fuck they are together and sorted out the issues they had earlier this year.

Day 14: My first day proper of furlough. Finished my two inch review of the NME 50 albums. Long chat with Rita, quick one with dad. Messaged Sam about Romiley’s present - she’s 10 on the 9th April (Thursday) - ordered some Lego thing from Amazon. Turned the car engine over (reminded myself the driver-side wing mirror is fucked) and moved it to another spot in the Co-op car park - bumped into Matt T. He’s struggling - no work coming in and he can’t claim any of the money on offer ‘cos he’s not being totally honest about his circumstances - made me realise I’m not that bad off…..but I feel depressed about it all, especially with the news that Boris has gone into intensive care.

Day 15: I began a diploma (?) course on web design with Shaw Academy (it was free). They have actual classes (which are recorded) which you schedule yourself. The first one was, I have to say, really interesting - I look forward to continuing. On my walk today, I saw a car parked at the gate to the field at the bottom of Riverside Close; it was branded with Cunninghams Estate Agent with a 01536 number. I am pretty sure I saw the driver walking her dog (unleashed) on the field. I took a photo and rang the number. Yes, I ratted the culprit out…fucking annoys me that I had to. Better than reporting to the police, all round. Hopefully her work will put a stop to her doing it and, the more people that adhere to the rules without the police getting wind of infractions, the more likely we’ll be able to continue to exercise away from home.

Day16: More online learning including checking out other sites (pluralsight) for more learning opportunities. Coded my first web page, basic but mine, in HTML and CSS. A few beers & smokes and watching White Boy Rick in the evening, interspersed with the usual social media / messaging shit, incuding this entry, of course!

Day 17: Typing this on Day 18. After a few beers last night while chatting with Fog (twice - the first chat ended with him ‘having’ to go to bed. Later, I noticed he was commenting on FB, so I video called him…round two of chatting!). I got quite fucking pissed. Bed around 4am.

Day18: Up at 1pm. Long walk today, 7 km. Anything over 40 minutes, I’ve realised, results in a hypo.

Day19: Well, having gone to bed at gone 5am I got up at nearly 1pm feeling far better than I should have. Breakfast followed by a walk, spoke with Karen (mowing her front lawn) and Dan. He and Grace have split up which is sad news but he seems OK. Went shopping (milk and sweets) and ended up with a shit load of booze, the post of which on FB was quite amusing. Homemade burgers for tea (they’re in the fridge as I type) - gonna try and make Five Guys…

Day20: The Five Guys burger attempt didn’t go as well as I wanted. I think less than 5% fat mince just doesn’t bind that well. However, I managed to get something resembling a burger into the bun and, with cheese, hot sauce and jalapeños, it was tasty enough. More of the same when I finish typing this entry. Strange Easter Day today, as I knew it would be. The best thing I saw today was a video Tom posted on FB of him and Molly doing a mashup of Starsailor and George Michael - Tom on guitar singing the former, Molly singing the latter. It was fucking fantatstic.

Day 21: Easter Monday. Surreal…it’s feeling very surreal now, this lockdown.

Two things that bother me right now:

i) The political point scoring on FB. I get it, I really do…people like to bring up ‘obvious’ failings in the party’s mistakes. For example, Marc posting comparisons between UK and Germany’s figures of cases and deaths due to Covid-19. I doesn’t make impressive reading for the government and it should be held accountable. But not fucking now!

ii) Will they introduce rotational furloughing at RCI? It’s only been a week, 11 to go. And, it bothers me that I was furloughed rather than Mark. Pathetic of me, I know! But, should it last the 12 week stretch, I want to go back to work and let someone else have the chance to have fuck all to do all day! That being said, I’m still learning web design through Shaw Academy. Even today, bank holiday, I revised Lesson 2.

Day22: Nice catchup with Dad today - he and Rita seem to be more than OK with lockdown. I actually cannot wait until we can meet up at The Farmers again!

Day 23: While I had a Corvee engineer come to the house today to do a gas safety check (I waited upstairs while he was here, self-isolation and all that), and had the fourth online web design lesson, had a trip to Boots to pick up insulin, got milk from Tesco’s, saw American Rachel and had a chat (while we both queued to get into Tesco’s) and had a very nice walk along a different route from the norm, in the pleasant sunshine and watched Contagion on Netflix - all today - I AM STILL BORED AS FUCK!

Day 24: I had plans for today - revise the last two lessons of Shaw Academy’s web design course, investigate a ethical hacking course, do some washing, clean upstairs (or at least the bathroom) plus all the usual stuff. Then, as a reward, have some beers. Well, guess what. I am not having beers this evening. I managed the laundry. Plus I manged to subtitle my YouTube perfect snabby video (something I have been meaning to do for a while, but, come on!) It took me fucking ages. But it is funny! So, a fucking far from fruitful day. Plus the government announced at least 3 more weeks of lockdown. There’ll be loads more, I reckon. Tomorrow…I promise I’ll be better tomorrow…

Day 25: I did do better! Firstly the Corveee man fucked the boiler which I only noticed late yesterday but still managed to get sorted today. I did some excellent revision and learning of HTML (tags) and CSS. I cleaned the bathroom and hall. And I discovered TikTok (fucking excellent dancing and funny vids) plus discovered a new FaceBook word game (Sam sent me an invite) called WordBlitz and I am pretty good. Having beers now (nearly 11pm).

Day 26: Today I found myself calling 111. I had a pain in my side last night, I thought it might be constipation! That not being the case (!), today I went to 111.nhs.uk and, following their questions, it recommended I seek out a GP straightaway. Once I let the website know that is not possible, it directed me to visit walk in centres. I spoke with Karen thereafter - for advice about whether it’s a good idea to enter such an establishment - I really don’t want to increase me chances of catching the Covid-19 virus. Karen recommended ringing 111 since the website does not take into account my diabetes (so bloody sensible a suggestion!)

After ringing and answering many questions, the lady said she’d get an OOHS GP to call. The doctor called soon after and it seems most likely I have a grumbling appendix (chronic appendicitis) and to ring again (well, 999) if the pain becomes unbearable.

I now have a bag at the ready for hospital which I really hope I don’t have to use. Today, I have, therefore, done fuck all - not even a walk - but I am having a beer now (midnight) and shall attempt to sleep as well as possible and hope this pain subsides naturally…

It occurs to me that I turn to Karen when things become flumoxing - my excuse, this time, is she works at the surgery but that was mere convenience.

Day 27: My ‘appendicitis pain was the same when I woke up (10:20) but no worse. I managed to change bed clothes and clean my bedroom but didn’t risk a walk (in case something drastic happens when I’m in a fucking field).

People’s responses and questions online have been heartening (Rachel Harris, Susie Grange, Bethan, Jo, Tracey Weber, Debbie De Prisco and, not least Dan). As the day progresses, I feel better but not right. I spoke with Dad about it and, as I told him, I shall ring Oundle GP tomorrow. Meanwhile, I did Sam Clew’s FB Live quiz, which was good, and am now having a beer or two.

Day 28: The pain in my side has definitley diminished. I called the Oundle surgery today to talk about what treatment I should have for ‘grumbling appendicitis’. The reseptionist organised a call back from a GP - Dr. Cash. Basically, he said he didn’t believe the condition existed, that acute appendicitis doesn’t happen after the age of 35, and ‘his gut felling’ is it will all just clear up.

I shall seek a more sensible diagnosis after lockdown and hope it doesn’t flare up again before then.

Day 29: I sent an email to the team at work today (Jim, Mark, Cristina and Sueanne). I hadn’t heard from them and I wanted to check in and, also, make a point that I will be posing the ‘rotational furlough’ question to HR at some point. It was as I wrote the email that I realised it’s only been two weeks and two days of furlough, and that includes Easter! Seems so much fucking longer. Anyway, everyone replied and it was good to hear from them….Mark came off his bike and broke ribs and collarbone! Lesson 5 of the Web Design course with Shaw Academy. It’s becoming apparent that, if you don’t pay for the course ‘toolkit’ it’s all rather patchy! The instructor dives into lines of code (HTML, CSS and Java) with no explanation….I feel like I did on the ifrst lesson of further maths ate Stamford School! I shall soldier on and beef up the missing parts with W3Schools (a great website and learning aid for coding). Two quick points. I am no longer running any part of my daily walk; hurts too much. I am addicted to Wordblitz and TikTok. Day30: I am writing this on day 31, I just forgot yesterday! It was a non eventful day. I did watch Midnight Run (again!) and had a couple of midweek beers though.

#diary #tumblr diary #lockdown #covid19 #lockdownuk

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fresh-outta-jams · 5 years

Text

No Idea

Jungkook x Reader Author: Admin Mo Prompt: Ah, okay! I was wondering if I could request a jungkook werewolf au/ best friends to lovers au where, the reader is more of a home body and jungkook is the life of the party and he's constantly trying to get her comfortable with being in public and such due to her being his mate but, he's too scared to tell her that. I'm sorry if this doesn't make too much sense, I'm not good with putting thoughts to words. Note: I’m always a ho for Werewolf aus ;) Warnings: Like one swear. Word Count: 1.9k

“You didn’t hear a single word I just said, did you?” Jungkook waved his hand in front of your face.

You blinked a few times and looked up from the pages of the book you had started reading earlier that afternoon. You were about halfway through the yellowed pages and you intended to finish before midnight. Your best friend, however, had other plans.

“I’m not going to whatever party you’re trying to drag me to. I have better things to do. Like reading, for example.”

“You read yesterday.” He pointed out, motioning to the stack of finished books sitting on the side table beside the couch.

“And I’m going to read tomorrow and the day after that. What’s your point?” You smirked and tucked your tattered bookmark into the spine.

It had always been this way. Jungkook, Mr. Golden Boy, a busybody who was popular with everyone, and you, a lonely bookworm who much preferred the comfort of your chair by the window and the pages of your favorite book as opposed to...anywhere else. For some reason, he’d befriended you, and for some other unknown reason, he’d stayed your friend. He always tried to get you to go out with him and you always refrained and that was the way it was. That was the way it always would be.

“My point is,” he huffed, sitting beside you and putting his hand on the cover of your latest read so you couldn’t attempt to open it, “you need to get out more. Live a little.”

“I am living.” You took in a breath and let it out. “See? Breathing. I’m fine right here. Besides, you know I don’t exactly fit in with your crowd. No offense.”

“None taken.” He searched your eyes, quiet. You didn’t know why he insisted on spending so much time with you when it was obvious you were polar opposites; you loved to be inside and he couldn’t be contained. “Please think about it? Just this once?”

“That’s alright. You have fun, though. Send me some pics.”

“Of course.” He leaned in and gave your cheek a little friendly peck. Your heart fluttered and he flashed you that famous devilish bunny grin that had captured the hearts of all of the girls in school before grabbing his things and walking out the door.

***

Jungkook, unbeknownst to you, of course, was a werewolf. His pack consisted of himself and his six closest guy friends, almost all of whom were happily mated with their imprints. Their maknae, however, hadn’t even told his what he was, nor that she was the equivalent of his supernatural soulmate. It was a mess.

“You DIDN’T TELL HER?” Taehyung laughed. “Kook, you have to break the news to her eventually.”

“I know that.” Jungkook sighed, slumping further into the beanbag in the corner of the room. “But what we have going is good. If I tell her...I’ll ruin it.”

“And if you don’t tell her, she’ll start dating some asshole, you’ll get jealous, you’ll argue for a bit…” Yoongi rambled for a little while, almost as though he was speaking from experience. “Just tell her you’re in love with her.”

“I seriously don’t know how you can stand her scent knowing she’s not yours yet.” Namjoon noted.

Jungkook stiffened, a growl escaping his gritted teeth. “She’s mine.”

“We know that. But does she?” Jin’s expression softened. Jungkook thought about it for a long time. He was positive that if he had to hear about the hot guy in your poetry class one more time that he was going to explode.

Jungkook nodded and stood up from his spot, determination glinting golden in his eyes. “I’m going to fix that.”

“Right now?” Jimin looked up at the maknae with wide eyes. Rain pounded against the roof loud enough for them to hear it over the loud music playing from Hoseok’s speaker. “In the rain?”

“Yep.”

“I can drive-”

“Nope. I can get there faster.” Jungkook shook his head and shed his shirt, pulling the screen door open as he felt the changes coming on. His muscles tensed, senses heightened, his body twisted and cracked and shifted into place as he took on the form of the wolf. Before any of his pack mates could say anything, he sprinted off into the night, sprinting in the direction of your house as fast as he could. He wasn’t sure how you’d take the news, but he hoped it would go well. He didn’t know what he would do with himself if it didn’t.

***

Satisfied with yourself, you closed the book you had just finished reading. Now you had the freedom to pick another one to start tomorrow. Rain pounded against the skylight of your living room, a nice background noise for a quiet night in. The candle you had lit a few hours ago filled the room with the soft scent of vanilla, and your fuzzy socks set the ultimate mood of comfort.

Though you were comfortable, you couldn’t help but let your mind wander to Jungkook. He was out there somewhere in that big bold world of his, partying the night away. You hoped he was having fun. You were not, however, expecting a knock at the door. Nor were you expecting a soaking wet, half naked Jungkook to be standing in the orange light of your porch.

“What are you...doing here?” You tried not to let your eyes wander down his thick golden muscles, dripping with rain drops. This was your best friend, the best friend you didn’t realize had been hiding these from you beneath his cozy hoodies. “I thought you were at a party.”

“We need to talk.” He stepped inside and closed the door behind him.

Shocked, you took a step back, wide-eyed. He almost sounded angry. Or nervous? You couldn’t tell. Maybe both. Was he upset you hadn’t gone to the party with him?

“Is...is something wrong?”

Jungkook exhaled a few breaths, his shoulders heaving. He looked like he had just run a marathon, and when he finally made eye contact, you swore his eyes were golden instead of their usual brown color. Maybe you’d been staring at words for a little too long because something about that picture wasn’t quite right.

“I’m a werewolf.” He blurted.

At first, you froze, unsure of what to do or say. You expected him to crack that bunny smile of his after a few seconds to show you that it was a joke. It had to be a joke, right? But when he didn’t redact his statement, you laughed awkwardly a few times.

“Wow. Funny. I get it. Too many books. Nice contacts, by the way. Alright, message received. I’m going upstairs.” You turned, but he firmly grabbed your wrist, holding you in place with his intense golden gaze. Up close, they didn’t look like contacts…

“(Y/N). I’m being serious.” His face was as straight as you had ever seen it, not a hint of falsehood in his expression. “I would never lie to you. You know that.”

You opened your mouth, running through your memories with Jungkook to retrieve an example of a lie he had told you, but you couldn’t think of one. Come to think of it, you really, really couldn’t. Any time you asked him to do something, no matter how simple it was, he always did it. Your wish was his command from day one. And when you reminisced on the first day you had met him, when you made eye contact across the classroom with him, the very next minute, he introduced himself, blushing and stuttering and all kinds of flustered.

No.

It wasn’t possible. This was not happening. Out of all the books and fanfictions you had ever read, you’d never imagined something like this could ever happen, let alone to someone like you, a lonely bookworm whose only friend was a party animal. And now, it was looking more and more likely that the ‘animal’ part was literal.

“What are you telling me?” Your question came out as a whisper, your back hitting the wall when you made an attempt to evade the tension blossoming between you.

“You already know.” His voice was softer this time, but it wasn’t any less intense.

“So you, what, you imprinted on me?” Your voice rose in question, like this was a joke too, but he didn’t move. He only swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing. He shifted his gaze away from yours. You whispered, “Holy shit. You did, didn’t you?”

“Yeah.” He exhaled, finally letting go of your wrist. Every muscle in him was tense. He couldn’t look you in the eye anymore, waiting for the harsh sting of rejection to hit when you finally told him the words he had been avoiding for so long. “Yeah, I did.”

“I…” No way you strung the words together sounded right.

“I get it. If you don’t want me. It’s okay. Really, it is.” Tears stung in his eyes. He promised himself he wouldn’t cry in front of you over this, but the longer you were quiet, the likelier it was looking that he was going to break that promise. “Don’t worry about it. You don’t have to see me again. I’ll just-”

“Shut up.” You commanded. He did, silence growing to fill the space between your words. You’d almost forgotten what all of this meant, that he was at your mercy now. Well, he always had been, but you hadn’t realized it until a minute ago. “Wolves mate for life. Yes?”

“Yeah.”

“So, by that definition, I...I’m all you’ve got.”

“Yeah…”

You thought for a long time, the silence almost strangling him. He just wanted your answer. The wait was killing him.

Then, you gently intertwined your little fingers with his large ones and he was sure his heart was going to burst through his chest. You whispered, “Look at me.” He did. His intense eyes sent a tingle up your spine. They were glassy with fresh tears. Unable to hold yourself back for another second, you launched yourself into his arms, wrapping yours around his shoulders. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner, you idiot?”

A tsunami of relief washed over Jungkook and his already-wobbly knees gave out, sending him, and you, to the floor. Hot tears ran down his cheeks and he held you tight against his chest. He peppered your face with a million overjoyed kisses before nuzzling your neck.

“I love you s-so much.” Jungkook’s sobs were muffled in the fabric of your sweatshirt. “So, s-so much. I’m s-so sorry-” he sniffled, “I s-should have t-told you and I d-didn’t and-”

“Shhhhh,” you coaxed, running your fingers through his hair, still wet from the rain outside. “I love you, Jungkook.”

He pulled away to look at you, breathing heavily. It was like time had stopped. Everything clicked into place. Slowly, Jungkook leaned in. You gasped softly as his lips met yours. Hours ago, kissing Jungkook wouldn’t have even been a shadow of a thought drifting around your imagination. But now, kissing him was the only thing you could imagine. The feeling of his lips on yours was something new, but it also ignited a flame in your chest that you never knew could be lit, yet something that had been hiding inside you all along.

“I’m so glad we had this conversation.” You laughed softly as he peppered more kisses to your cheeks and neck and the corners of your lips.

He managed a few words in between, out of breath. “You have no idea.”

#kpopwonderlandtag #armyofwriters #jungkook #jungkook x reader #jungkook imagine #bts #bts imagine #reader insert #bts werewolf au

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mikauzoran · 5 years

Text

Adrienette Drabble Sixteen: Hole

Adrien survived Wednesday by hiding out in storage closets and sneaking into class through the back door just seconds before the teacher. He sat in the last row so no one could stare at him, and he carried all the things he needed for the day in his satchel so that he didn’t have to return to his locker and risk running into anybody between classes.

Lunch was tricky. He fled at the bell and hid until it was safe for Chat Noir to emerge and head up to a rooftop to eat undisturbed.

Thursday followed a similar pattern.

Adrien was beginning to think that maybe he could survive like this for the remaining two weeks of the school year when Nino ruined his plans on Friday.

“Gotcha!” Nino declared victoriously as he grabbed Adrien by the arm.

Adrien yelped and struggled frantically to escape.

Seeing the terror on his friend’s face, Nino released his hold. “Whoa. Chill, Mec. Hey!”

Adrien made a run for it, heading for the storage closet down the back hallway off of the gym.

Nino gave chase only to find Adrien cowering behind a rack of folding chairs. “Hey,” he called softly. “Adrien, it’s okay. I’m not gonna hurt you. What’s going on?”

Adrien curled in on himself, trembling as he gasped, “D-Don’t look at m-me.”

Nino backed away slowly and took a seat on the other side of the chair rack. “Okay. I’m not looking at you. …Can we talk about this?”

Adrien didn’t respond.

Nino pursed his lips. “You breathing over there?”

“N-No,” Adrien answered honestly.

“Okay. Let’s do that first. Can you take a deep breath for me?” Nino coaxed and listened to Adrien inhale. “Now exhale slowly, all right?”

Adrien did as requested.

“Good. Good job. Now do it again, okay?”

Nino waited, listening to Adrien for a couple breaths before remarking, “You know, I’ve been worried about you. You haven’t been answering your phone, and every day when I stopped by your house, they told me you were sick.”

“I…don’t have my phone. I’m not allowed to talk to Marinette, so…Nathalie has it locked in a drawer…so that I’m not tempted,” Adrien explained, shame filling his voice.

“I see,” Nino whispered. “Well, I’ve been trying to get ahold of you.”

Adrien gulped and replied in a tiny voice, “Sorry.”

“Nah, it’s okay. Don’t worry about it. I’m just glad you’re…” Nino trailed off because Adrien was obviously not “okay”. “…not dead or something,” Nino finished lamely.

Silence fell between them again, and Nino let it be for a while.

“…Is there anything you need from me? Seriously. Anything. Even if you think it sounds dumb, go ahead and ask,” Nino offered.

Adrien didn’t respond right away. “…Can I have a hug? I know guys don’t hug, but…”

“Guys not hugging is a stupid rule,” Nino snorted, getting to his feet and going over to sit beside Adrien, wrapping an arm around his friend and pulling Adrien in.

Adrien circled his arms around Nino’s waist, tucking his head under Nino’s chin.

Nino gave Adrien a squeeze, resting his head against Adrien’s and assuring, “Mec, you can have a hug whenever you need one. Anything else you need?”

Adrien shook his head. “…You’re not going to press for an explanation?”

“You don’t owe me one,” Nino replied simply.

“I feel like I do.”

“But you don’t,” Nino chuckled.

Adrien made a disgruntled noise.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Nino prompted.

“I think you already know what happened,” Adrien mumbled.

“I’ve heard the heavily redacted, hysterical-Marinette version, but that wasn’t what I asked you. Do you want to talk about it?”

Adrien considered for a moment before snuggling in closer. “There’s nothing to talk about. I screwed everything up. Marinette doesn’t want to date me. I’m walking wounded here. There’s nothing to talk about.”

“I don’t think that’s what actually happened, but…okay,” Nino easily agreed. “We’ll leave it alone for now, but if you change your mind and do decide that there’s something to talk about, just let me know, okay? For now, do you want to go get some lunch, or do you want to stay here a little longer?”

Adrien raised his head to look curiously at Nino while still maintaining a loose hold. “Get lunch…with you…and Alya and Marinette? I’m allowed to come back?”

Nino winced. “Uh…Sorry. Just with me. I don’t think…I don’t think lunch with the girls is a good idea.”

Adrien pulled away, nodding as he wrapped his arms around his knees and hugged them into his chest. “Yeah. Okay. No…I’m good. You should go eat with the girls, Nino. You don’t have to share my exile with me. Go eat with your…your girlfriend.” The word got stuck in Adrien’s throat.

“Dude, no,” Nino insisted. “And you’re not in exile.”

Adrien rolled his eyes. “I think that’s kind of the definition of exile when you’re not allowed to go back to someplace you really want to be. You should go have lunch without me.”

“Adrien,” Nino sighed. “Look. I’m going to tell you a secret. Even if I wanted to go have lunch with the girls—which I don’t because I would never leave a buddy hanging like that—I can’t.”

Adrien arched an eyebrow in confusion. “You ‘can’t’.”

Nino shook his head. “Marinette would kill me. She is seriously out of her mind with worry because of you. She told me Wednesday to go eat lunch with you—again, not that she needed to because I was going to anyway—but you disappeared so fast, and I couldn’t find you. Same thing on Thursday. Today, Marinette took me by the collar and told me that I had better track you down and make sure you weren’t eating alone otherwise she’d take my Miraculous and give it to my brother Noël. So, you see, I couldn’t eat lunch with the girls even if I wanted to.”

Adrien’s jaw dropped. “Y-Your Miraculous? Did you just say your Miraculous?”

Nino’s mouth rounded into a little ‘o’. “Shoot. She didn’t tell you about that part? She told me she’d told you that you could talk to me because I knew everything. I thought she’d…”

Adrien shook his head in a comically slow fashion.

“Well.” Nino pursed his lips. “I guess both the cat and the turtle are out of the bag now.”

Adrien paled. “She…told you about me?”

Nino waved his arms vehemently. “Nonono. I figured that out myself from context.”

Adrien frowned incredulously. “What context?”

Nino rubbed at the back of his neck, averting his eyes. “Well, last Friday she texted me about dating Chat Noir, and then Saturday afternoon I texted her teasing about her sexy kitty boyfriend, but she flipped and said she absolutely could not date Chat Noir, but then she wouldn’t explain. I asked if it had anything to do with Adrien-you, and she flipped some more about how you’d confessed to being in love with her and how things were a mess. At that point, I kind of put things together and realized the only way that the situation made sense was if you and her friend Minou were the same person.”

Adrien’s face lost all remaining color.

“I also realized that I had helped steer her off a cliff by suggesting she date Chat Noir,” Nino groaned.

“Oh,” Adrien replied softly. “…Thank you for saving my butt the other day with that silly putty akuma.”

“Any time, Mec…. I am going to be a wreck from now on knowing it’s you out there,” Nino realized. “This is going to suck.”

“Sorry in advance,” Adrien muttered.

“You’d better be when you literally give me a heart attack,” Nino snorted.

“…Your gamer tag finally makes sense. NinjaTurtleIRL…. Isn’t that a little obvious?” Adrien snickered.

“It’s been three years, and you haven’t figured it out,” Nino countered smugly. “Is ‘LeChatDeLaPrincesse’ any better?”

Adrien winced.

“Come to think of it, you’ve had that handle for a couple years now, haven’t you? But you only started liking Marinette romantically a few months ago. What’s up with that?” Nino quirked an eyebrow suspiciously.

“Okay, so maybe I’ve had a low-grade crush on her for a while. Chat and Marinette started hanging out two, two and a half years ago, and…I don’t know.” Adrien shrugged.

Nino nodded. “Many guys have found themselves in a state of ‘I don’t know’ with Marinette. It’s a common reaction.”

Adrien sighed, resting his chin on his knees. “Yeah, but how many guys has she driven past the brink of desperation into lunacy?”

“You’re not crazy, Adrien. You’re just in love. Trust me. I know they feel similar, but there is a difference,” Nino assured.

“…I got my father to allow me to see a therapist,” Adrien remarked in a voice just above a whisper.

“Dude, that is awesome!” Nino gave Adrien’s upper arm a celebratory clap. “I am really excited for this new leaf your dad has been turning over lately!”

Adrien grimaced. “All it took was telling him I was afraid I’d end up killing myself if things didn’t get better.”

Nino’s elation quickly dissipated. “You shouldn’t tell people that…unless it’s true.”

Adrien gulped and nodded. “I don’t ever want to get to that point, but with the way things are going…I am afraid of eventually getting there.”

Nino wrapped his arms around Adrien once more and squeezed tight. “We are going to get you better, okay? We’re going to keep you safe, so don’t worry about the future. Let’s focus on the here and now. All right?”

“‘Kay’,” Adrien mumbled into Nino’s neck. “Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it. I’ve got you,” Nino promised.

They stayed like that a good minute before Nino tentatively pulled back to ask, “You doing okay now? You want to get some lunch, or is there anything else we need to talk about?”

“I’m ready for lunch, but I don’t want to go down to the lunch room with everyone else,” Adrien admitted.

Nino nodded. “All right. I’m going to go get food, but then I’ll meet you back up here, and we can eat together wherever you want. Sound like a plan?”

“Sounds like a plan,” Adrien affirmed with a grateful smile. “Thank you.”

Nino rolled his eyes fondly as he got to his feet. “Silly boy. You don’t have to thank me. I love you, Mec. I’m here for you.” With a wink, Nino was off, leaving Adrien to consider what a great friend he had been blessed to find.

…And the fact that Marinette was still looking out for him, worrying about him eating lunch alone when she wasn’t in a place where she could eat with him herself.

Hope swelled in Adrien’s chest.

Adrien told Nino to head back to class first after the lunch break and that Adrien would be along soon. When Adrien snuck into class through the back door at the very last minute, he found Nino sitting in the back row in the seat next to the one right by the door that Adrien had been occupying the previous two days.

Adrien blinked owlishly.

“Can I sit here?” Nino inquired, prepared to be told no. “It’s okay if you want to be left alone, but I thought you could use some company.”

“You don’t want to sit up front by Alya?” Adrien pressed, chewing on the inside of his cheek.

Nino waved away Adrien’s concern “Not until my best bud can sit up there next to me.”

“Sometimes I want to kiss you,” Adrien chuckled. “Thank you, Nino.”

“Any time,” Nino assured as he tried to keep his blush under control.

#Adrienette #Miraculous Ladybug #Miraculous Ladybug Fanfiction #Marinette Dupain-Cheng/Adrien Agreste #Adrien Agreste #Nino Lahiffe #Marinette Dupain-Cheng #Mikau's Writings #There's a Daisy

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greyias · 6 years

Text

FIC: By the Guidance of Stars - Chapter 4

Title: By the Guidance of Stars Fandom: SWTOR Pairing: Theron Shan/f!Jedi Knight Rating: T (this chapter) Genre: Angst, H/C, Romance, Humor Synopsis: The Coalition tries to heal in the aftermath of the Battle of Yavin 4, but not every wound is physical. A series of missing scenes set during the end of Shadow of Revan. Warnings: See Chapter 1.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Crossposted to AO3

As morning wore on, the drizzle eased into a light mist and the camp began to rouse. The mugs of caf had long since been drained and Theron had reluctantly forced himself to begin tackling the mountain of paperwork waiting for him. That afternoon’s unofficial debrief loomed in the back of his mind, and in an effort to distract himself, he’d thrown himself into filling in as many details of the entire Revanite debacle on his official report, starting all the way back to the initial mission on Korriban.

Well. Most of the details. There were some interpersonal things that would not be making their way into an official report. He was only a kiss-and-tell kind of guy when it was part of the official mission log. And this confusing thing he had with a certain Jedi Master was nobody’s business but their own.

Of course, focusing on his paperwork would have been much easier if he didn’t have to keep trying to stop one Doctor Archiban Kimble from second-guessing the excellent care of sneaky medical droids.

“Can’t you just read whatever the droid wrote and let it go?” Theron grumbled. “I have to finish this report.”

“And I have to make sure that all of my hard work on Rishi wasn’t undone last night.”

“It wasn’t.” Theron glowered at him and then pointedly returned his attention to the datapad. “Now go away.”

“Yeah, that’s not going to work this time.”

“What’s not? Speaking Basic?”

“Your overworked slicer schtick. No datapads during medical examinations. Doctor’s orders.”

“Didn’t stop you last time.”

“Yes, well, I made an exception then because my favorite Jedi was about to be blown to smithereens by your grandpa’s cult.”

“It’s a few more generations than just grandfather.”

“Eh, details.” The datapad was deftly plucked from the spy’s hands and stowed inside of of one of the medic’s inner pockets. “You get this back after we’re done.”

“You’ve got nerves of steel, Doc,” Theron warned. “I’ve shot people for less.”

“Maybe, maybe not.” The medic grinned. “I figure I’m safe. A certain Jedi is very fond of me and my untimely death would make her very sad.”

“And what makes you think that would affect my aim?”

The medic arched one dark brow, as if it was obvious. “You seemed pretty concerned earlier from what I saw. Holding hands and everything.”

Theron wasn’t able to suppress the curse that slipped out. It wasn’t exactly a private area they’d been in, but he had hoped everyone had been too busy with their celebrations to notice that unplanned moment. Of course, unplanned moments seemed to be the norm with her rather than the exception.

Not that he had the greatest track record with sticking to a plan — he tended to fly by the seat of his pants at the best of times. But even if he’d wanted to, he never could have accounted for that ridiculous pirate costume she had picked up from a street vendor for her undercover persona. Nor for the way she got drunk during one of Jakarro’s cantina outings—forcing Theron to figure out how to transport a hopelessly inebriated Jedi back to their hideout without either of them getting shivved in a back alleyway. Or the way her grip on him had lingered before she’d left for that last battle on Rishi, practically shouting the order for Doc to stay behind and take care of him.

And actually if Theron thought about it longer, the one consistent factor in all of that had been the medic currently pulling out his scanner so he could begin to examine the chest of his very reluctant patient. As Doc had been the one to help her pick out that stupid outfit, had left an entire pitcher of fruity alcoholic drinks on the table after leaving their team gathering in a snit, and had been just as annoying at insisting on making sure Theron didn’t have any life-threatening internal injuries just like he was now.

The medic let out a quiet chuckle, apparently mistaking the reasoning for the glare pointed in his direction.

“Don’t worry, I made a lot of loud and rousing toasts over in my area of camp. Your aloof reputation is safe amongst the larger crowd.”

“I get the impression that wasn’t for my benefit,” Theron grumbled.

“No, it wasn’t.” Doc narrowed an eyebrow at the tiny screen in front of him, and started to do some more detailed scans over the previously injured area, as if he needed to double-check something. “But if getting a camp of Imperial and Republic troops inebriated in the early hours of the morning is what it takes to get that woman a small moment of peace, I’ll make that sacrifice for the greater good.”

“How magnanimous of you.”

“It’s a heavy burden sometimes, being such a hero.”

“Are you still drunk?”

“Eh, sober enough to look you over.”

“I think I feel safer with the droid.”

“Has anyone ever told you that you are a horrible patient?”

“Probably about as often as you’ve gotten complaints about your bedside manner.”

“You be quiet and let me finish.”

“And if I don’t?”

“I’ll call your mother over here.” Doc grinned.

“I swear I’m changing my last name when I get back to Republic space,” Theron muttered darkly.

“I’ll still know.”

“Two can play at that game, Archiban.”

Doc shot him a dirty look, but returned to fiddling with his scanner. “Look, I know you’ve got your own reasons, but still… thanks for looking out for her.”

Theron indeed had his own reasons, but much to his chagrin, none of them seemed to stem from anything remotely resembling reason. Of course, he hadn’t really ever been accused of being the most logical agent in SIS. However, there was no way he was admitting that aloud. “I get the impression that you and your crew have been through a lot.”

“Some of us more than others,” Doc muttered darkly.

“Yeah.” Theron pursed his lips. “Got that impression too.”

Considering Grey’s reaction earlier, that was putting it mildly. He was regretting not having figured out what had been redacted before they had gotten to this point—and before he’d made a promise to not pry. Of course, that six month gap had nearly put him off selecting her for the Korriban mission completely. If he’d done that, then he wouldn’t currently have to be listening to Doc ramble on. Of course, then he wouldn’t have met her either.

Something inside his chest twisted. It was probably because he’d been an idiot and had drank too much caf this morning instead of having a real breakfast. He probably needed to find something more substantial before the debrief this afternoon. Or maybe he could just choke a ration bar down as he didn’t really have much of an appetite at the moment.

Doc gave him a funny look, almost as if he’d been reading the spy’s inner thoughts. Theron didn’t really want to get a lecture on his poor diet on top of everything else this morning, so he just glared at the ground instead.

“I’m surprised you didn’t ask.”

“I might be a spy,” he ground out, “but I can respect boundaries. I’m not going to force her to relive anything just to satisfy my curiosity.”

“While I appreciate the gesture,” Doc said quietly, “I think things are going to come to a head sooner or later, whether or not you ask anything.”

Theron glared at the ground, not sure what to make of the internal war raging inside of his gut. “She’s still got you and the rest of your crew. Should be enough, right?”

The medic let out a sad sigh and shook his head, but didn’t say anything else on the subject. There wasn’t much to say, Theron had already made a promise not to pry, and he wasn’t about to go back on that. Keeping promises wasn’t exactly something most people in his line of work did. Although this wasn’t work. This was… it was…

It was none of his damn business is what it was.

And he knew that. Despite his chosen profession, there were some lessons from his childhood he’d had a hard time shaking off. A lot of adjustments—sacrifices even—had to be made in order to get the mission done, because that served a higher purpose in a way he couldn’t with his natural born talents, or lack thereof. It was often a struggle to be the person that Ngani Zho had raised him to be, and beyond just that, he wanted to be a man of his word. At least with the important people.

And she was... yeah. She was one of them.

It took a lot to get under his skin, but that little Jedi had managed it quite effectively. And despite his best efforts, he was just along for the ride at this point, that much was clear.

“Well,” Doc said, barely managing to keep irritation from bleeding into his tone, “looks like between my wonderful skills as a medic, a little help from the Grand Master, and that barely adequate droid, you’re going to be just fine.”

“I already told you that,” Theron said, his own frustration mounting. “If you had just believed me then we could have avoided this whole awkward conversation.”

“Yeah, well,” Doc said lightly, stowing his medical scanner, “I had to be sure. It would be irresponsible of me if I didn’t ensure that you were in peak physical condition before taking on any… strenuous activity.”

The insinuation on what the medic thought of Theron’s intentions was all too clear, and he couldn’t help but snarl. “That is none of your damn business.”

“I’m just looking out for your welfare,” Doc grinned. “You wouldn’t want to sprain anything. That would definitely kill the mood.”

“I am not having this conversation with you.”

“I assume you know all about using protection—“

“Give me my datapad!”

“And I expect you to behave like a proper gentleman.”

Theron’s hand curled into a fist, and it took all of his effort to keep it down at his side. “Now.”

Doc sighed dramatically, but pulled out the requested device with dramatic flair. “Fine, fine.”

The spy snatched the device and started to move away from the medic with a quickness.

“Oh, and Theron?”

“What?” he tossed over his shoulder, not bothering to hide his frustration and not slowing his hasty retreat in the slightest.

“I meant what I said back on Rishi.” The joviality had faded from Doc’s tone, leaving behind a steel certainty. “I know every way to cleanly break any bone in the body. I would keep that in mind if I were you.”

“You threatening me?”

“Only if you hurt her.”

“You and Scourge should form a club.”

“Not my first choice, but I’ll consider it. If it comes to that.”

Theron beat a quick retreat to the safety of one of the private tents before he could be pulled back into anything resembling conversation with the medic. He had no desire to hear any more advice on his love life. Or hear about the ways in which he would be maimed if things didn’t somehow go according to Doc’s outdated notions of romance. For possibly the first time in his career, Theron couldn’t wait to get lost in the minutiae of the Republic’s endless trail of paperwork.

Next Chapter

#swtor fanfiction #theron shan x jedi knight #Theron Shan #Female Jedi Knight/Hero of Tython #archiban frodrick kimble #otp: adorkable #oc: greyias highwind #SoR Fic O Doom #a short one this time #we have to get in some more antics from Doc before the inevitable family melodrama #swtor #fanfic #greyfic

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essayonskillsandabilities830 · 4 years

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write my essay for me

About me

My Relationship With My Parents Essay

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askcaffeinehazard · 7 years

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About me!

Decided to fill the whole thing out :F

1. What is you middle//full name? Samantha Marion [redacted]

2. How old are you? 26~

3. What is your birthday? 14th November, 1990

4. What is your zodiac sign? Scorpio, baby!

5. What is your favorite color? Green, duh

6. What’s your lucky number? Don’t really have one?

7. Do you have any pets? Yep! Currently only two cats and a bunch of fish personally. I sadly had to rehome the ratties after Virgil bit me pretty bad (caused nerve damage in my finger) Now that I have full time work, I don’t have the time to have done trust training all over again. I found a loving home with a very keen young girl who’s willing to do all the trust training he needs c: Our household currently has two dogs, four cats and a bunch of fish though.

8. Where are you from? Queensland, Australia

9. How tall are you? 5′3″ or 160cm

10. What shoe size are you? 7-8 women’s or 5-6 men’s depending on the make

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? Like.. two pairs of work shoes, one pair of sneakers and maybe two dress shoes.

12. What was your last dream about? It was pretty fucked up.. Let’s not go into it :F

13. What talents do you have? I have a really long tongue?

14. Are you psychic in any way? Nope

15. Favorite song? Don’t currently have a “favorite” but I do like Unbound and Bad Company by Five Finger Death Punch.

16. Favorite movie? Don’t currently have one.

17. Who would be your ideal partner? Spades hurrr

18. Do you want children? My animals are my children

19. Do you want a church wedding? Nope! I’d like a garden wedding <3

20. Are you religious? No, sorry.

21. Have you ever been to the hospital? When I was a baby, I was severely dehydrated and almost died 8D Apart from that, nope.

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? Only for not wearing a helmet on my push bike.

23. Have you ever met any celebrities? Dr Chris Brown (famous vet in Australia. Aka The Bondai Vet)

24. Baths or showers? Showers

25. What color socks are you wearing? None! But I do have panda slippers on 8D

26. Have you ever been famous? Nope, I think I prefer it that way

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? God no.

28. What type of music do you like? I like heavier music. Five Finger Death Punch, Avenged Sevenfold, Metallica. That sort of stuff. I also love Lindsey Stirling

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? Lol, yes.

30. How many pillows do you sleep with? One boomerang pillow. It’s the best thing ever.

31. What position do you usually sleep in? On my side with one arm under my head.

32. How big is your house? We have 6 bedrooms, I prefer a smaller house honestly but Hazz had this house before I moved in :P

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? Usually a toasted sandwich or marmalade on toast.

34. Have you ever fired a gun? Nope, unless a pellet gun counts.

35. Have you ever tried archery? Yesss, I love it!

36. Favorite clean word? Nugget (also Haru’s nickname :F )

37. Favorite swear word? Fuck-knuckle

38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? I tried to do an all nighter and passed out by 6am .__. I NEED MY SLEEP, OKAY?!

39. Do you have any scars? Way too many to count..

40. Have you ever had a secret admirer? Yep, lol.

41. Are you a good liar? Nope 8D

42. Are you a good judge of character? I like to think I am

43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? Yep, I can do stereotypical American, Southern, British, and that’s about it 8D

44. Do you have a strong accent? I’m Australian so... Yes, I have an Australian accent. Though I’ve been told that I don’t sound like a typical Aussie.

45. What is your favorite accent? Uhhh I do love Irish and Scottish though I have trouble understanding it sometimes :F

46. What is your personality type? Anxious, weird, shares way too much about herself.

47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? Uhh probably my fursuit.

48. Can you curl your tongue? Yes, I can also turn it upside down and poke it out. The benefits of a very long tongue.

49. Are you an innie or an outie? Deep innie

50. Left or right handed? Right handed.

51. Are you scared of spiders? Depends if it’s venomous or huge or not.

52. Favorite food? Is coffee a food?

53. Favorite foreign food? The the moment it’s Japanese curry

54. Are you a clean or messy person? Messy :/

55. Most used phrased? (Not sure off the top of my head)

56. Most used word? (Also not sure)

57. How long does it take for you to get ready? Like ten minutes, if that.

58. Do you have much of an ego? Not at all

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? Suck at first and then bite when I get bored.

60. Do you talk to yourself? I have DID so.. is it technically talking to myself or my alters?

61. Do you sing to yourself? See above.

62. Are you a good singer? HEEELLL no

63. Biggest Fear? Natural disasters, end of the world.

64. Are you a gossip? Yes, I can be.

65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen? I don’t really watch dramatic movies

66. Do you like long or short hair? Short hair on females, long hair on males.

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? Fuck no. We don’t learn about American states in Australia.

68. Favorite school subject? Art and English

69. Extrovert or Introvert? Major Introvert.

70. Have you ever been scuba diving? Nope

71. What makes you nervous? Everything ?

72. Are you scared of the dark? Very much so.

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? Yes, but I try not to. I don’t want to sound pretentious.

74. Are you ticklish? Nope

75. Have you ever started a rumor? Nope, but as a kid/teen I did help spread one..

76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? I ran an art class once for a very short time so...yes?

77. Have you ever drank underage? Yes, and I regret it.

78. Have you ever done drugs? Never

79. Who was your first real crush? I THINK it was some kid named Diarmid (Dee for short) in my fourth grade class?

80. How many piercings do you have? Six in total

81. Can you roll your Rs?“ Yep

82. How fast can you type? I have a tested speed of 89WPM with a 99% accuracy

83. How fast can you run? Not very fast at all

84. What color is your hair? Black and green

85. What color is your eyes? Dark brown

86. What are you allergic to? The glue in bandaids

87. Do you keep a journal? Not anymore. I used to at the request of my psychologist.

88. What do your parents do? Mum works as a cleaner. Step dad works as a bobcat and excavator driver in the mines

89. Do you like your age? Eh, it’ll change in a few months.

90. What makes you angry? Lots of things. Rude people, ungrateful people, people who take advantage of others, liars, inconsiderate people, animal abusers.

91. Do you like your own name? Nope. And I HATE my last name. Can’t wait to change it.

92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? Yes, but I don’t really plan on having kids. I love the name Vincent and Arcana.

93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child? Currently neither. I have a nephew and I’m happy enough with that.

94. What are you strengths? I am good at listening to what is troubling people and offering advice based on my own experiences.

95. What are your weaknesses? MOST THINGS. Anything to do with the public and strangers.

96. How did you get your name? Apparently Samantha was a very uncommon name when I was born and my dad was like “Let’s call her that” when I was born.

97. Were your ancestors royalty? Not to my knowledge. One was a convict, though.

98. Color of your room? Basic boring white walls.

99. Color of your bedspread? Greenish sheets and grey striped blanket.

100. Make up your own question Nah.

Original questions by http://kpop-babygirl.tumblr.com/

#Mod talks #long post #words

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mjstearsforhealing-blog · 7 years

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Trauma Induced Substance Abuse

Substance abuse/dependency not only affects individuals who find themselves caught in the heavy, unmanageable net of addiction, it also affects the family. It can tear loving families apart, leaving those involved bewildered by the destruction of the storm that swept through their lives, sometimes before they realize exactly what happened. Hindsight can reveal the dynamics of the storm which can explain the addiction to those who were left scattered on the path after the storm passes, but it cannot bring back a lost loved one, such as an adult child. After losing my child to substance abuse, I have come to realize many things that lead to his destruction. The probability he was sexually abused as a young boy by a trusted minister is very high. The anxiety disorder caused from this tragic experience can explain the need my son had to self-medicate. We know children who are abused grow up to be adults who exhibit low self-esteem and are filled with pain, anger and self-loathing. As he grew older, he chose to deal with his pain by self-medicating with prescription pain relievers, or when unavailable, a similar drug sold on the street. This is what led to his death and his death has changed me forever. Through my debilitating sadness, my hope lies in the fact we may be able to help other parents from suffering this same loss by finding ways to address this growing and intertwined problem of prescription pain relievers and heroin abuse in our country.

My child did not want to die, he wanted to relieve his pain from the trauma he experienced as a child. Unintentional overdose deaths from prescription pain relievers are soaring in the United States and the consequences we are observing are devastating and affecting families, even in small, rural areas. This is no longer an urban problem. It has sunk its very roots into every crack in our country and has taken hold in places once considered safe from things like drug addiction. Parents are scared. I am still scared. I have lost one son, will I lose another, or even both who are remaining? The thought of losing either of them is with me throughout my day, every day of my life. Something must be done.

***The above was written for a grant addressing substance abuse. This is the first time I have written something for grant work that is emotionally bound to me like super glue... Below is the note to the writer who requested it with a few thing redacted.

I can tell you this…I MISS him. I want to go back and try to fix this and keep it from happening. The world beyond Lake Village that knew Pruitt LOVED him. Everything that happened to him after a behavioral change at the age of 11 exacerbated his problems. He did not know he could tell us what had happened at camp. He didn’t know HOW to tell us. I tried so hard to help him find himself again, but he was SO LOST. He changed. All those things – symptoms I listed above were what I dealt with every day. I am so GLAD he moved away and was loved by so many. Escaping, sadly, did not come soon enough for him. My heart aches to hear him talk to me and giggle again. The pain I live with everyday cannot be put into words. There are simply no words for it. I will fight until my dying breath to help others avoid the trauma my son faced and to help others find help for their sweet children who find themselves in the throes of addiction.

No one should have to suffer the loss of a child this way. You can use some of what I wrote, all of it or none of it. I won’t get my feelings hurt. This was hard….hard to sit and think about what to say… My emotions for a grant…. It feels funny.

I could tell you so many other things that crossed my mind when I start thinking about him leaving me so soon – like not getting a chance to say good-bye, or the phone call I woke up to that day with Lilly screaming on the other end that he was dead. I live with that every day. It rings in my ears constantly. If we could save one family from experiencing the pain our family has been through, it would be worth it to me. We cannot save everyone, but we can save SOMEone.

My compassion for humanity is so much bigger now. Everybody gets a free pass from me. People are suffering everywhere and we need to show them more love and kindness. I always think “I wonder if someone close to them just died” and I let it go…whatever it is they did that was not quite the right thing to do. We have so many things to worry about as we raise our children and do our best to encourage them to be loving and contribute to society. We certainly do not need drugs involved as we try to lay foundations for morality and kindness. What a different world we would live in if we could remove this barrier. I wish I could have done more for him. I wish I knew then what I know now. I can sit here and wish my life away, or I guess I can get busy working for change. I suppose I will choose the latter.

***So, to those who are reading this, this is why I have changed. This is why I tolerate some of the things I do now. This is why I have NO tolerance for nit-picky little things that do not add up to a hill of BEANS to me. It is time to stop picking on people, stop humiliating people, stop arguing about CRAP that doesn’t matter and get up off our ASSES and DO SOMETHING. DO SOMETHING!!!!! It is TIME. It is PAST time.....

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arsonsara · 7 years

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The One They Left Behind (Nuclear Throne Fanfiction)

I.D.P.D Mission #19-21-9-3-9-4-5 13-9-19-19-9-15-14, Log #1:

This is the first time they're sending me in alone. I would say i'm scared but, frankly I asked for it. Litterally. This shouldn't be too difficult of a mission. Just take out the target, and return back home. They say it's a creature that's extreemly volitiale, made out of pure radiation and is a huge threat to our very way of life. I don't know much about these Mutants other than what i've heard in passing but they say this one is a Class 5 Threat. Which must mean it's high priority. They nicknamed this one Horror, after what it could possibly do if it ended up here at home base. I think it's pretty obvious how much damage a being made of pure radiation could bring, especially with how high risk things are now with the rift we opened up. A lot of people said that creating that machine was worth it, that travelling to other dimensions could mean so much in the way of science. In my opinion they were just asking for this to happen. Who am I to complain though, what's done is done. I just need to remember to delete the last few sentences of this log. If I come back to home base after this mission is done and the first log they see has me shitting on one of our main areas of expertise, that's just a one way ticket to getting demoted. Like hell I want to be in the Grunt Squadron again.

Log #2:

As i'm writing this, i'm in my own personal I.D.P.D Vehicle made for one man trips to other dimensions. Lot less spacey than the Vans but, than again I doubt they'd waste an entier Van on one guy. Still, I can dream I suppose. R kept on telling me that if I wanted she could come along too but even if I wanted her to come along, the orders were already given and with how much of a ruckus she's been causing already I doubt the Captain is willing to put up with her. I don't get why they always act like R is some moron. If she has the training and capability to use the Portal Strike Equipment and not die she should pretty much be running the show at this point. Plus as stupid as it sounds, she takes her job less seriously than most. I swear all I hear back at home base from the Shielder Squadron is how much they can't wait to kill a mutant. I swear half of the Shielder Squadron got their positions because they just wanted to get away with murder. R just got the job because she wants to protect what she cares about and...that's commendable in an I.D.P.D Member. Serve and protect. You're not some goddamned maniac with a gun shooting at anything that moves, you're doing this to protect the Earth from radioactive threats. I mean with how dangerous these mutants are god knows what they'll do if they end up here. Just because you have the power to kill them doesn't mean you should just go full bezerker. Seriously sometimes I wonder if Shielders know how to aim a gun with how much they spread their bullets. If a Shielder ever tried to use my gear they'd probably end up shooting themself in the face. I guess it's a good thing this is a solo-mission, huh? Nobody's around to see me shit talk. Still, I hope R will be okay back at base. She worries for me a lot, especially since she seems to really care about me. She told me that people like us need to stick together. That we could be the future of the I.D.P.D and actually not have to fight anymore. I wonder if that'll ever happen.

Log #3:

I've finally landed. The Frozen City. Crazy to think this place was once bustling with people just like us, and now it's litterally and metaphorically a nuclear winter. I'm going to make a station on one of the nearby skyscrapers that were left abandoned long ago. Most of the hostile creatures in this land tend to stay outside, leaving the interior buildings completely empty. These things almost seem to patrol the outside, looking for something. What that is i'm not sure. They are robots afterall so it's no surprise that their actions seem predetirmed. How these things run on radiation i'll never understand. Maybe that's how this universe got so fucked in the first place. Too many eager scientists ready to see the effects of radiation in the modern world, and soon enough it blew up in their faces. Litterally.

Log #4:

Camp has officially been set up. I was able to drive the I.D.P.D Car into the garage of one of the buildings. This place is huge, was probably used for parking seeing as a city probably doesn't have many open parking spaces. But now that everyone is gone I can just drive this baby into the deepest parts of the place and just be here for as long as I need to be. I was given the basics to survive, rations, munitions, hell they even let me take one of those small TV's that people take on camping trips and stuff. It'll keep me preocupied for when nothing is going on, but I doubt that'll be the case in a place like this. I doubt that anyone of those robotic freaks would want to sit down to watch some cartoons. Either way it's kind of surreal to be in a place like this. A cold, dark, empty parking garage in a city filled with robots ready to kill without a second thought. Guess the I.D.P.D didn't want to put that down on the job description. Either way, I better get to sleep to find Horror.

Log #5-15:

[REDACTED]

Log #16:

[LIVE LOG RECORDING]

I found it...it's in my sights right now. God it really lives up to it's name doesn't it...how something like that exists i'll never know...Stand still you freak...

{A gunshot is fired, and off in the distance a distorted, loud noise can be heard, followed by distorted growls and moans}

What the fuck?! What the hell was that?! Did it just desentegrate the shot with...oh fuck it sees me!

{Multiple gunshots are fired, and the distorted noises get louder and louder. Soon enough, Hunter is pinned to the ground and all that can be heard are his screams and the sound of something charging. The log cuts off prematurely.}

Log #17:

[LIVE LOG RECORDING]

{Deep, heavy breaths for at least a few munites before Hunter begins to speak}

I lived...I don't know how the fuck I did it but i'm alive...and i'm not going back after that thing. The only way I survived was because the Blast Armor was able to deflect some of the damage that thing did with...whatever it was. It was almost like a compression blast of radiation. I don't know if it's in my system yet. I hope I can get back to base before it comprimises anything...

{More breathing}

Mission Failed...I.D.P.D Member #8-21-14-20-5-18's Solo Mission has been compromised...requesting backup...

Log #18-23:

[REDACTED]

Log #24:

They aren't coming. They left me here. I've been requesting a rescue team for days and i've not gotten a response. I didn't want to believe it...but they left me here. They knew I failed and they fucking left me here to die...worst part is I just might. The radiation is affecting my physical state. I feel like it's slowly eating away at me. I can barely stand up anymore...what the hell did that thing do to me?...I'm going to try and obtain some radiation samples. See if I can somehow stop this so I can at least find an I.D.P.D Squadron out on a reconnosance mission or something and not die here...but even if I do find one they might just shoot me on sight...but I don't want to die. I don't want to die.

Log #24-45:

[REDACTED]

Log #46:

I need more. I'm going through withdrawls and I need more. These fuckers are hiding it from me. I know it. Those metallic bastards want me to starve out here. But It's in them. I know it is. I've seen their bright green blood. It's in them. I need it. I'll tear them apart from the inside if I need to. I need it. I won't die like this. I won't die. I won't die. I won't let myself die. I'll kill them all before they can kill me.

Log #47-55:

[REDACTED]

Log #56:

Sometimes I still call them. Someone has to hear my calls for help. But nobody ever responds. I always hope that R picks up on the other end and tells me that she's coming to rescue me. Sometimes I have fever dreams and in between the madness I see her face in this cold wasteland, holding her hand out to pull me out of this insanity. It's in my brain. I'm loosing my grip. I can't tell what's real anymore. Sometimes my vision blurs and all I see are targets...targets with it inside them. It's inside them. It's inside all of them and I need it! I NEED IT!...I...I just don't want to die. [NAME REDACTED] Please help me. Please. Please respond, I don't want to die like this! I don't want to die! I want to leave and have this sickness cured because sometimes I forget where I am!...I don't want to die...

Log #56-307:

[REDACTED]

Log #308:

GUNTHER AND ME FOUND ANOTHER TARGET TODAY. HE WAS BIG, GOLD AND FULL OF RADS. HE TRIED TO FIGHT BACK BUT GUNTHER WOULDN'T LET HIM. HE DIED AND IT WAS ALL MINE. HIS BRIGHT GREEN BLOOD OOZED ONTO THE SNOW AND I TOOK IT. I NEED IT! ME AND GUNTHER NEED IT! I CAN'T JUST LEAVE GUNTHER BEHIND LIKE THAT! HE NEEDS ME! SOMETIMES GUNTHER TELLS ME HE'S AFRAID TO DIE. BUT I ALWAYS TELL HIM THAT THERE'S NOTHING TO FEAR. HE'S WITH ME! I CAME AND RESCUED HIM! HE ALWAYS CALLS ME WHENEVER I PUT HIM DOWN, SAYING I NEED TO 'RESCUE' HIM. POOR THING! HE'S LIKE A BABY! BUT THAT'S OK! I'M HERE TO PROTECT HIM LIKE I ALWAYS DO! I LOVE GUNTHER! AND HE LOVES ME! HE KILLS AND I EAT! I EAT AND HE KILLS! KILLS KILLS KILLS! KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS KILLS!

Log #309-412:

[REDACTED]

Log #413:

I FOUND ANOTHER TARGET TODAY. IT'S SICKLY BLUE. I HATE BLUE! I HATE BLUE! IF I COULD I'D TEAR OFF MY OWN SKIN BECAUSE OF HOW MUCH I HATE, HATE, HATE BLUE! I SAW IT OUT IN THE FROZEN WASTES. IT DEYSTROYED SO MUCH. IT KILLED SO MANY THINGS. IT TOOK SO MANY RADS...THOSE ARE MINE. THOSE ARE MINE! THEY'RE MINE! I NEED THEM! I NEED THEM!!! I'M GOING TO TEAR THAT BLUE BEAST APART! I LOOK AT THAT BLUE AND ALL I CAN FEEL IS HATE! HATE! HATE! IT NEEDS TO BE KILLED! IT NEEDS TO BE RAVAGED! IT NEEDS TO BE SHOT! A MONSTER LIKE THAT CANNOT EXIST IN MY WORLD!!! IT DESERVES TO DIE!!!

Log #414:

[LIVE LOG RECORDING]

[A jetpack can be heard, after a few minutes of that a loud slam can be heard followed by maniacal laughter]

H: HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

{Shots are being fired in random directions, all that can be heard is gunfire and loud explosions. After a few minutes of the strife, there is silence.}

H: WHY ARE YOU HIDING?! GUNTHER AND ME ARE GONNA FIND YOU EITHER WAY!!! THIS IS OUR HOME! YOU DON'T BELOND IN OUR HOME!!!

{Another person can be heard, shouting in the distance}

R: Hunter, it's me! Stop shooting, i'm here to save you!

H: LIES, LIES, LIES!!! I DON'T NEED TO BE SAVED! COME OUT ALREADY, I'M TIRED OF WAITING!!!

R: Hunter!!! Stop! It's [NAME REDACTED]!!! You have to remember me!

H: I'M DONE TALKING!!! IT'S TIME TO START SHOOTING!!!

{More Gunfire, within the strife a loud series of explosions is heard and Hunter's armor is severely damaged.}

H: N-NO! NO MORE!! I GIVE!!! I GIVE!!!

{A siren is heard, and a loud vehicle crashes into the distance and shouting is heard.}

H: HELP!!! HELP ME!!!

I.D.P.D Squadron #13-21-18-4-5-18: Shoot the fucker! NOW!!!

{Multiple gunshots, peircing through the armor of Hunter and causes him to start bleeding out}

R: NO!!!

{More gunfire, followed by another set of explosions and the death of I.D.P.D Squadron #13-21-18-4-5-18 at the hands of The Rogue. The Rogue than begins to walk towards Target: Hunter, Class 5 Threat}

R: Oh god...oh god, Hunter please tell me you're still alive. I tried so hard to come find you, you can't die on me!

{Rustling can be heard as Target: Hunter tries to reach for it's weapon. It does so and begins to shoot in vein at The Rogue.}

H: DON'T TOUCH ME! DIE! DIE!!! I DON'T WANT TO DIE!!!

{The Rogue fires back, piercing through Target: Hunter's Jetpack and causing a volitiale reaction, blowing him up and killing him instantly.}

{Target: Hunter, eliminated. The Rogue still lives. Find her, retrieve the Portal Strike and kill her. She is classified as a Class 6 Threat. Kill her at all costs.}

#Nuclear Throne #Little Hunter #Vlambeer #Rogue #Hey I wrote a Thing

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