#i always forget that i am like. so fucking attracted to women

[buppypuppy]

*thinks about women with deep voices and my head explodes into chunks of gore*

#i always forget that i am like. so fucking attracted to women #until i see a gorgeous woman and im like ohh hiiii hiiiii eheheheeeee lol hiiiiiiiiiiii #like i love whoever i love i don't label my sexuality. but like #holy fucking shit thank you women for everything ever #god damn the sun

[inkskinned]

before you know about women, you hear that you do not need to love the man, just that you need to love him through his manhood. which is to say you have seen the future painted in lamb's blood over your eyes - how your mother shoots you a look about your father's inability to cook right. how your aunt holds her wineglass and says i'm gonna kill em. men, right! how your best friend bickers with her boyfriend, how she says i can't help it. i come back to him.

you learn: men are gonna cheat. men aren't going to listen when you're talking, because you're nagging. men think emotions are stupid. they think your life is vapid and your hobbies are embarrassing. men will slam things, but that's because men are allowed to be angry. if you get loud, you're hysterical. if a man gets loud - well, men are animals, men are dogs, men can't control their hands or their eyes or their bodies. they're going to make a snide comment about you in the locker room, about your body, about how you're so fucking annoying. you're going to give him kids, and he will give you the money for the kids, and you're going to be running the house 24/7 - but he gets to relax after a long day, because his job is stressful. the man is on stage, and is a comedian, and says "women!"

and you are supposed to love that. you are supposed to love men through how horrible they are to you - because that's what women do. that's what good women do. wife material. your father even told you once - it'll make sense when you're older. it was like staring down a very lonely tunnel.

it feels like something's caught in your throat, but it's all you know, so. it's okay that you see sex as a necessary tool, a sort of okay-enough ritual to keep him happy, even though he doesn't seem to care about happiness as-applied-to you. it is relationship upkeep. it is kissing him and smiling even though he didn't brush his teeth. it is getting on your knees and looking up and holding back a sigh because he barely holds you as you panic through the night. it's not like the sex is bad and you do like feeling wanted. and besides! he's a man! like... they're another species. you'll never be able to actually communicate, right. he isn't listening.

you just don't get it. you don't feel that sense of i'm gonna climb him like a tree. mostly it just feels fucking exhausting. you play the part perfectly. you smile and nod and are "effortlessly" charming. and it's fine! it's alright! you even love him, if you're looking. you could have good life, and a good family, and perfectly happy.

in the late night you google: am i broken. you google i'm not attracted to my husband. you google i get turned on by books but not by him. you google how to get better in bed.

the first time he yells at you, it almost feels like blankness. like - of course this is happening. this is always how it was going to end up. men get angry, and they yell, and you sit there in silence.

you mention it to your friend - just the once - while you're drunk. she shrugs and says it's like that with me too, i just try to forget and move on. men are always gonna hear what they want to. pick your battles and say sorry even though he's in the wrong. you play solitaire online for a month. you go to your therapist appointment and preach about how you're both so in love.

after all, you have a future to want. nobody lied about it - how many instagram posts say marriage is hard. say real love takes work. say we fight like cats and dogs but the best part is that we always make up. how many of your friends say happy anniversary to the best and worst thing to ever happen to me. if you really loved him - loved yourself too - you'd accept that men are just different from you.

the first time she kisses you, it's on a dare at a party. something large and terrifying whips through your body. you wake up sweating from dreams where her mouth is encrusted with pearls and you pick them off one by one with your teeth. fuck. you sit at the computer and your almost-finished game of sim city. you think about your potential perfect life and your potential future family. you google am i gay quiz with your little hands shaking.

you delete each letter slowly. you don't need to love him. you just need to keep going.

#warm up #writeblr #this is also about being ace btw #my identity has slowly shifted over time and maybe if everyone is REAL cool i'll talk bout it #bc it's complicated and nuanced. but this is like #trying to warn u that if you find it “relationship upkeep” to have sex with ur partner #and don't actually enjoy it or seek it for urself. u might just not be attracted to them. #which is fine ! ace ppl can be perfectly happy in any relationship they feel good in! #but also i wasn't as straight as i had expected! #> the first time i saw dick i was like. huh. oh okay that's fine i guess #> the first time i saw pussy i was like. WAIT ACTUALLY HANG ON I GET IT #i just assumed sex wasn't all it was cracked up to be ya know #but also like. btw? this IS NOT saying ''u might be gay not ace'' #bc tbh i'm grey ace/demisexual #it's saying u might not be into ur partner. explore urself & ur feelings. turn inward. #TAKE THIS IN THE MANNER IT WAS MEANT> GENTLE AND KIND #AND NOT IN A WEIRD INTERNET WAY PLEASE #bc the truth is that there ARE ppl who are gay who assume that they just ''don't like'' sex #and ace ppl who might need a different partner w/different needs #and i would have REALLY needed to hear ''check in w/urself about if u actually like sex'' #WAY EARILIER in my life. but nobody said anything bc they assume if ur having sex. u like it. #not just the actual act of sex. not once ur turned on. do you ACTUALLY like it. or is it a burden? #even if ur gay. check w/urself. maybe ur more ace than u realized. in which case. ADDITIONAL FLAG BB #i love collecting my flags. i'm at like 354 at this point #but also btw this is about how toxic relationships are SO normalized that u can be in one #and have everyone around u being like ''THATS JUST MEN LOL''

[negandarylsatisfaction]

[SUMMARY: Negan becomes tempted with his younger sisters bestfriend.]

Smut

“You are one hell of a fucking tease, you know that?”

It had been five years since you had last seen your bestfriend Trish, growing apart then finding your way back, you both had a lot to catch up on. For a few days now the two of you had been hanging out, filling each other in on life and what not. She was still living with her older brother like she always did. He was almost twenty years older than her and when their parents died when she was fifteen he took her under his wing. You didn’t remember much of her brother besides the fact that he rode his motorcycle, always had different women and sometimes got into trouble. He had a temper that you heard of, but you never really saw much of it. Negan did his best to not get this way around his sister, but the town knew how he was.

That night she invited you back to her place for pizza. The two of you laughing on the couch when you heard the door unlock. Trish continued her story but you couldn’t help but get distracted as her brother appeared from the door. He was more much rugged looking than you last remembered but still handsome, hints of gray in his hair, he closed the door behind him before you realized Trish was calling for you.

“Earth to Carmella” she snapped her fingers making you look back at her.

“I’m asking if you want another slice before my brother takes over this pie” she chuckled as he walked towards the two of you. He figured she was home hanging out with one of her friends as usual, he didn’t notice who you were.

“Negan, you remember Carmella? Don’t you?” He took a double take at you, a bit of a surprised expression on his face.

“Shit. Look at you” you smiled in response.

“Could you believe it’s been five years since we’ve seen her?” Trish continued as she got up to find the remote. She didn’t notice how her brothers eyes never left you.

“Five whole years huh” Negan muttered as his eyes wandered down to your bare legs crossed beneath your skirt. He quickly caught himself somehow forgetting you were staring right at him.

“Hi, Negan,” his eyes shooting right back up to yours.

“She might stay over a few days if that’s ok, we have some plans early tomorrow” Trish sat back beside you flipping open a magazine as Negan took a step back rubbing his hand over his lips. Shit, you had changed so much.

The way he was looking at you causing you a tingly feeling in the pit of your stomach. Never had he looked at you this way before but you knew this look, you definitely saw him look at other women this way growing up.

His lips slightly curving into half a smile as he winked at you.

“Hello?” Trish looked up catching his attention.

Negan cleared his throat looking over at his sister.

“Can she stay or what?”

“Stay here?” Shit, he didn’t think it was the best idea for you to be staying in the same house with him. Negan knew he was attracted to you and he knew how he was when he wanted a woman. He knew he had to keep his distance from you. There was only so much he would be able to hold back.

“No the Empire State Building, yes obviously here, Negan where else?” He looked at her with a raised brow.

“Watch that smart mouth-“

“You’re not the only one with a sarcastic mouth in this family big brother. So can she stay or what?”

“Sure,” Negan cleared his throat before walking out the living room.

“What the hells up with him?” Trish mumbled to herself as you watched him leave the room. Her eyes back in the book as you hid a smile with the way Negan had been looking at you.

The two of you watched a movie as you heard Negan upstairs on his phone. He cursed a lot, you figured he was talking to some girlfriend he must’ve had. He closed his bedroom door before Trish caught your attention.

“Carmella” you looked over at Trisha who seemed annoyed.

“Are you even watching the movie?”

“Of course I am” you insisted as you crossed your arms and faced the television.

After a bit Trish decided to shower before bed while you offered to clean up the kitchen. Negan walked in expecting to find his sister but instead found you tip toeing putting away things in the cabinet. He stood for a moment watching you struggle to reach high up. Each time you tip toed your ass poked out a bit beneath your skirt, the sight beginning to turn him on.

“Fuck me-“ he whispered just as you turned around and gasped.

“Oh Negan, I didn’t know you were there” you spoke innocently not having heard him. The counter in front of him blocking the view of his arousal. Had you not been distracted with what you were doing you would’ve noticed the way his eyes were glued on you.

“Do you think you can help me real quick?” You turned back to the cabinets.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, sweetheart” he pressed his lips together hoping you wouldn’t insist. He knew he wouldn’t be able to say no to you for long.

“What do you mean?” You laughed a bit confused.

“It’s fast I promise” he made his way behind you planning to quickly help you and leave, making sure he wasn’t too close behind.

“I just need help to put these back in that spot” you tip toed once again showing him where to place the bottles.

“Why the hell isn’t Trish helping you with this shit, she’s the one who made this mess” he mumbled to himself frustrated that he was some how in this position with you.

“Look, I’m sorry I won’t bother you again” you looked back at him confused by his attitude. Standing back down flat on your feet you accidentally stumbled a few steps back stopping with your ass against him.

“Oh-“ Your body froze feeling what felt like a boner against your ass. Your lips parted as you stood still.

“Shit” you heard him whisper, neither of you moving.

“Negan?” You whispered without turning back.

“I’m gonna need you to leave the room, sweetheart.” He knew if anyone was going to leave it would have to be you. If he moved an inch more it would only be towards you.

“Why don’t you?” You teased without looking back, apart of you wanting to see what he would do.

“Shit, just do as I fucking say.”

Of course, you didn’t.

“I saw the way you were looking at me before” you spoke softly.

“Carm-“ you purposely pushed yourself back against him making his dick press harder against you.

“What the fuck are you doing?” He groaned as you felt him place one hand on your hip without realizing his reaction. He spoke in frustration but his body acted another way.

“It doesn’t feel like you have a problem with it” You bent over a little more looking back at him. A sneaky smirk on your face you watched as he looked down at your ass mesmerized. Negan looked like he didn’t know what the hell to do with himself. He was breathing heavy, you could tell he was fighting himself from lifting up your skirt.

“Go ahead, I know you’ve been wanting to see..”

“You are one hell of a fucking tease, you know that?”

“Is it teasing?” A hint of sarcasm in your voice.

“Shit, you know I can’t” he spoke without taking his eyes off your ass.

“What are you afraid of your sister?” Your question making him look up directly at you.

“Fuck no”

“So then?” you reached behind pulling up your skirt when he suddenly grabbed hold of your wrist.

“Don’t start what you can’t finish”

“And who said I couldn’t?” You pulled your arm back before slowly pulling up your skirt showing the black thong you wore.

“Oh shit…” he whispered as he slowly pulled your ass against him. He almost felt as if he was about to burst right in his pants. Turning to him you pulled him close, his eyes looking down at you as if he was hypnotized.

“What the fuck” he panted just before you placed your lips on his. Without questioning it he pulled you close, his hand brushing through your hair, his tongue swirling with yours you quickly reached down and unzipped his pants. His dick hard throbbing in your hand, his breath close against your lips.

“Do you have a condom” you whispered as you stroked him making his eyes close, each touch just making it harder for him to hold back.

“Damn you, Carmella” his hand sliding up the back of your thigh. He began kissing your neck making you feel weak in the knees.

“Well…do you?” You rolled your eyes back as he lifted up your leg pushing your underwear to the side.

“I’ll pull out…I promise” he kissed you as you balanced yourself on one foot, tip toeing enough to let him slip right in. A satisfying groan escaping his lips as he felt himself inside you.

“God damn you-fuck-“ he choked out, his hands holding you tight.

“Go ahead, fuck me” you whisperered. He grabbed you harder wrapping your leg around his waist.

“What’s this fucking mouth you suddenly got on you?” He thrusted hard making you stumble back against the counter. A whimper making him chuckle.

“What’s the matter, sweetheart? Is this too much for you?” You moaned as he rocked his hips against you. Looking over his shoulder towards the door, you made sure his sister hadn’t come down until he roughly grabbed your face turning it back to him.

“What are you afraid?” He teased distracting you from any concern as a shot of pleasure ran through you. Your eyes rolling back

“Carmella, where are you?” Trish suddenly called for you making you gasp.

“I’m-I’m coming!” You called out to her making Negan grin.

“You sure are” he groaned running his hand through your hair, tugging it enough to pull your head back.

“Shit Negan-“ you panted as he tugged harder.

“You know what, I’ll be down there in a sec, wait for me” Trish responded.

“We have to stop” you whispered in a panic as he squeezed his eyes shut.

“Fuck”

“Negan!” You whispered hitting him on the arm as he thrusted once more before holding himself still. You realized he came.

“Did you just-“ Trish making her way down the stairs cut you off. Negan quickly pulled out turning away to zip up his pants as you quickly fixed your skirt. Turning away you looked down at the sink in panic turning on the faucet pretending to wash something.

“Thanks for cleaning up I’ll finish, you can go shower if you want” Trish came in the kitchen stopping to look at her brother who looked a mess.

“Why are you so sweaty?” He rubbed his face trying to catch his breath.

“Why’d you leave such a fucking mess” he retorted as he quickly walked out the kitchen.

“Why is he so damn moody today?” Trish whispered.

“Who knows” you muttered still a bit lost with what had just happened discreetly trying to catch your breath.

“Why don’t you go shower, I’ll finish up here”

Without saying a word you quickly turned away and made your way up the stairs to see Negan standing in the hall as if he was waiting for you. He quickly grabbed your arm pulling you toward him as he checked behind you to make sure his sister stayed down stairs.

“I cannot believe you fucking did that”

“Shh” he hushed you still looking down the stairs.

“No, I won’t shh. I didn’t think you were gonna do that-“ he suddenly yanked you into the bathroom cornering you against the wall in the dark.

“Well I didn’t think we were gonna fuck” he snapped back at you in a whisper leaving you silent. The tension still running high between the two of you.

“You promised” The way he was staring down at you, you could’ve sworn he was distracted all over again. He knew he promised, he swore he didn’t mean to do it on purpose but he had no idea the damn hold you were gonna have on him. Just thinking about it was turning him on all over again.

“Negan!” You slammed your hand on his chest.

“Alright!” He whispered back taking a step closer.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have done that but you made it a little fucking hard for me to pull out, sweetheart-“

“Oh did I?” You crossed your arms with a raised brow.

“Oh fucking yes. That pussy of yours is-“

“Carmella-“ Trish suddenly called from downstairs cutting him off.

“You left your phone down here someone’s calling”

“Look I didn’t do it on purpose alright” he whispered quickly before hearing his sister come up the stairs.

“Just go!” You shoved him out quickly closing the door and turning on the shower.

Trish came in leaving your phone on the sink as you stood in the shower. Staring at the wall you still couldn’t believe what you had just let happen. Never in a million years did you ever think you would sleep with Negan. What stressed you out more was wondering how on earth you were suppose to stay in Trishs home now. There was no way you could let this happen again.

#jeffrey dean morgan #negan #negan x oc #negan smut #negan fan fiction #twd fan fiction

[charmercharm3r]

left field

SCB

Masterlist

5/8 of The Sleepwear Series

wc: 6.5k

Synopsis: So many hints dropped, so little of them picked up.

warnings: smut, explicit sexual content, softdom!changbin, fem!reader, friends to lovers cus he's a cutie, mentions of periods, fingering, piv, marking, mentions of graphoerotica, creampie, pretty tame ngl

“God fucking damn it—“

You had already pulled your pants down and sat on the toilet when you saw the small red splotches of blood on the gusset of your underwear. Typical, your period decides to leak through your tampon while at your best friend’s man cave he calls a home. And your bag with necessities in the living room, out of reach. Changbin would die on the hill that his place is better than yours, but if that were the case then he’d have feminine products under the sink like most people. But he doesn’t, which not only proves your point but leads you to loudly call out for him from behind the closed door.

Heavy footsteps padded down the hallway followed by the door abruptly opening, your legs closing tight and pulling down your shirt to cover any indecent skin, “what the fuck?!”

Changbin looked at you with his eyes wide open and a worried brow, “you’re not dying?”

“I am now! Of embarrassment. Close the door!” He immediately stepped out and pulled it behind him just enough so there was a small sliver still open.

“You yelled my name, I thought you were hurt.”

“So you barge in like a fucking barbarian?”

“Well– yeah!” You could practically hear the gears turning in his head. “If you’re not dying, do you need something?” Changbin’s voice softened and he fiddled with the door knob.

“Can you get my bag for me?” The sheepish nature of your tone made him peak through the crack, “why? What’s in it?”

“Changbin, door!” As you pulled your shirt as far down your body as it’d go, he let himself into the bathroom entirely and stood with his arms folded across his chest.

It wasn’t out of the ordinary for him to lose his sense of personal space. To Changbin, your space was also his space, you would practically breathe the same air because sometimes he forgets that you’re your own person. Changbin doesn’t do it on purpose, though. It’s his way of showing his affection. There’s times where you’d be sat at the end of the couch and he’d plop down straight on top of you. His friends give him hell for it, always pushing him away but he is persistent. Jeongin is especially grateful for your presence, taking Changbin’s attention off of him and redirecting it onto you. Though, his timing isn’t always the best, catching you in the bathroom like this isn’t entirely uncommon.

“Are you being weird in my bathroom?” He narrowed his eyes at you, seemingly unaffected by the fact that you’re still sitting on the toilet.

“You’re the weird one! Why don’t you have pads or tampons? Do you hate women?”

You could see the lightbulb in his brain flicker on as he took a step back and uncrossed his arms, ears tinging red. “I don’t hate women! I love women– I love women a lot. Like a few months ago, there was a woman who got a lot of my love–”

“Ah, ah, ah, I don’t wanna hear it. Just get my bag, woman hater.” You shook your head and mumbled incoherent words until he finally left and returned with your purse.

If you were being honest with yourself, there was more than one reason you didn’t want to picture your best friend with another girl. There was the fact that he was built like an absolute unit and then some, charming and handsome and kind and thoughtful and funny... Also, just the image of him in bed with someone else was a bit horrifying. You knew him so well that thinking about it made your heart sink and cringe at the same time. Were you crushing on your best friend? Yeah, but who wouldn’t? Changbin is hot in the most endearing way– like he knows he’s attractive, just not to what extent. If only he knew… No, that’s unlikely. He’s the most oblivious person you’ve ever met.

As you rummaged through your bag to find something to ease the mess, Changbin still stood in front of you. “What are you waiting for?”

“How do tampons work?” He blurted out and eagerly watched you pull the little plastic tube out of your purse.

“If I tell you, will you leave me alone?” The rapid nodding of his head had you shoving your bag into his arms again and holding up the sealed tampon for a clear view. “Step one, open,” you unwrap it and hold onto the plastic packaging, “step two, insert. Step three push. I’m not showing you my vagina, so can you get out now? My legs are starting to go numb.”

As if his curiosity had been satisfied, Changbin shrugged and left, closing the door behind him while muttering a, “I’m so glad I’m not a girl.”

The next few hours were spent wasting each other’s time, starting a movie and not finishing it because he couldn’t sit still then attempting to toss popcorn in the air at you in hopes you’d catch it in your mouth. You amused him, of course. His laughter was contagious and it’d be a crime not to laugh along with him.

It was close to 9 p.m. when you decided to go home. The walk wasn’t far and you’d done it a million and one times, and every time Changbin offered to walk with you. You couldn’t really protest, especially when he never directly says he was going to walk you home. He’d make an excuse like he’s stopping at the convenience store or doing this and that. 

Upon coming up to your street, you asked him, “are you taking another late night walk that just so happens to be in the direction of my house?”

The two of you were shoulder to shoulder, hands occasionally brushing against one another as cars passed by. “I was going to get my mail but… I can’t remember where my mailbox is. Thought it might’ve been this way but maybe I was wrong.”

This is what always happened. You’ve known him for what feels like forever and every time he stops just in front of your apartment building, your heart breaks just a little more. You wished he’d come in, stay the night, be there when you woke up. He does this thing where he sticks his hands in his hoodie pocket and looks at the ground with a soft smile, he’s doing it now and peers up at you sweetly. Like the ground was suddenly offering to buy him a four course meal and dessert, Changbin dipped his head back down as soon as you met his gaze.

“You don’t need to do this every time. But bonus points for creativity,” you playfully nudged him on the shoulder, grateful for the cloudy night sky shadowing over the blush on your cheeks. 

Obviously, you loved that he did this for you. It makes you feel all kinds of warm and fuzzy inside. A part of you, a rather big part, wished that he’d do it because of a certain emotion, but again… just wishful thinking. Changbin walks you home because he’s a nice person. He makes up reasons to keep talking to you because all his other friends are busy. The only thing that could explain why he calls you all the time for the most random things is because he just blindly presses on his most recent call– that just so happens to be you. Purely coincidental, everything he does is because Changbin is your friend, your best friend. And it’s normal for friends to look at you the way he’s looking at you now, right?

Curtained by his natural curly hair, it was like galaxies had found a home in his eyes. “I want to,” he stuck his hand out to tap adoringly under your chin, “gotta make sure my favorite girl gets home safe.” The action and the words made your skin burn, but somehow shiver at the same time

“Did your mom finally tell you to stop calling her every night?” You brushed his hand away as you spoke, trying to conceal a flattered smile.

“Yeah, but my mom’s always number one. You still rank the highest out of all my girl friends.”

“I’m your only girl friend.”

“All the more reason you’re on top of the list.”

There was that stupid, lopsided smirk of his, annoyingly cute how it didn’t even seem like he was trying to be smooth with his words. Unruly locks sticking in every direction, sweater somehow concealing the muscles you knew him to have, you didn’t even mind that he was wearing slides with no socks, seeing Changbin so domestic made your heart swell even bigger than it already was. If you spent any longer with him, you were sure you wouldn’t be able to keep up such a cunning facade.

Low and behold the universe was listening whether it be beneficial or detrimental, a deep clasp of thunder boomed and not a second later began a heavy downpour of rain. While you didn’t move an inch, just looking up at the crying sky, Changbin wrestled his hoodie off and tossed it over your head like a canopy. You looked at him confused because you were standing in front of your house, if you got wet it was no big deal. Whereas he still had to walk home, but chose to rid himself of the only thing protecting him from the cold to make sure you stayed dry. How close he was now, tying the sleeves below your chin to make sure the jacket didn’t slip off your head. You couldn’t help the fondness in your expression, unable to see anyone but him.

“You’re staying over,” you say, taking his hand before he can protest and whisking him inside.

The both of you were soggy messes in the foyer of your apartment, unsure of what move to make. You thought you’d known what you were doing but now you were trapped with the only person in the world who could make you feel like bursting at the seams.

The same confidence that pushed you to invite Changbin inside was slowly fading, but you had enough left to begin to strip away your articles of clothing one by one, starting with the hoodie tied around your head. You plopped it on the floor and began to take your top off when Changbin dramatically flushed his back against the front door. “What’re you doing?” He asked, covering his eyes as you added your top to the wet pile.

“I don’t want my entire house to be soaked. Strip, I have spare clothes you can try.” Even if he tried to be decent and not look while you undressed, the irony of it had you rolling your eyes. “As if you weren’t in the room when I was on the toilet earlier.”

“Hey, that was different!” Changbin defended himself for a second before realizing the same thing you did, ultimately beginning to discard his wet clothes as well. When you shimmied off your pants and picked up the sopping pile, your best friend was handing you his shirt and looking you dead in the face as he unbuttoned his jeans. You didn’t think he intended for it to come off as electrically charged as it did, but it was like you couldn’t look away. Not that Changbin wanted you to, he loved the way you were staring at him.

Your eyes raked from his broad shoulders down the plane of his chest and tummy, keeping a steady gaze on the way his fingers elegantly unzipped and pushed the pants down his legs. When he handed the garment to you, you felt the searing heat of embarrassment shoot through your body. He stood with his hands on his hips, just in his boxers now.

The pace at which you ran towards the laundry room was laughable, for Changbin at least. He got a kick out of your antics, but he wasn’t sure how much more he could take. Changbin thought he was being as obvious as possible that he cared for you much more than a friend, but the message must’ve gotten lost in translation because not a single thing he put down, you picked up.

Changbin wanted to be embarrassed, walking around your house in just his underwear, but he felt more comfortable than anything. He’d raided your fridge for snacks, drank water, grabbed some alcohol, even sat on the couch because somehow his boxers were the only thing that didn’t get wet. A beer in his hand, feet kicked up on the coffee table then your and his favorite show clicked on in the background was his definition of home. He loved the atmosphere of your apartment, the smell of patchouli, soft yellow lights in the corners of every room, even if it didn’t have his play station or mini music setup that was an easy fix. So easily could he imagine himself waking up here every morning, waking up to you and being able to cook you a small breakfast before he went to work– 

Getting ahead of yourself, he thought.

You changed into some shorts and a shirt and gathered spare clothes before you fully stepped into the living room, you watched Changbin flow about the place. He seemed even more relaxed than he had back at his own house. Quietly you observed from a distance, your heart warming as he poured you a glass of wine and set it on the table for when you returned, unfolded the blanket that hung on the back of the couch and set it where he wanted you to sit– directly next to him, of course, the only acceptable place.

“Get your stinky butt off my couch,” you finally made your presence known and handed him the spare shirt and shorts, nudging his feet off your coffee table to sit beside him.

Changbin didn’t retort, simply following your order and standing. He decided to make you even more flustered than you already were, his junk eye level with your face as he slipped the shorts on. You loved his little tummy, finding it cute how he lightly rubbed it after putting on the shirt and sitting down again. “Thank you,” he mumbled, taking a sip of his beer. You picked up the glass of wine and tipped it towards him, “thank you.”

Silence, patchouli, and a hint of petrichor wafted through the room. When you shivered, Changbin set down his drink to reach both arms around either side of you, draping the earlier placed blanket over your shoulders. His touch lingered on the tops of your hands for a moment before retreating. 

Despite the sweet moment, you couldn’t help but become more curious of what he’d stupidly mentioned earlier. “So…” Changbin’s ears perked up, “going through a dry spell?”

A pink hue covered his cheeks, “what?”

“Before… you said it was a few months ago… the last time you were with someone.” Shyly, Changbin scratched at the nape of his neck and ran his fingers through his hair. He laughed, throat dry, “y– yeah. It’s been a while. Haven’t really had the urge to… y’know… seek anyone out.”

“I think I’m the only other person in the world who knows what you mean. It’s like everyone is dating and fucking and having threesomes, yet I can’t even do my laundry without getting tired–”

“Threesomes–?”

“I don’t want to put in the work to meet someone. It’s like everyone’s idea of dating is so different, and explicitly saying you’re dating to marry is some sort of turn off.”

“Wait– go back. Threesomes?” Changbin shifted to face his body towards you, clearly invested in the idea.

Bringing your glass to your lips, you shrugged, “just some girl at work telling me about these people she met. Said it was insane and mind blowing. Good for her, I just didn’t need to know so many details.” His mouth was dropped, tongue practically hanging out of his mouth. The brief mention of anything relatively sexual coming out of your mouth made Changbin’s mind immediately fall deep into the gutter. He couldn’t stop himself from imagining that there were two of you, each touching different parts of his body and covering him in your lipstick stains–

Jesus, get it together, Changbin shook his head and blankly stared at the television.

“Did you hear the part I said about dating? The more important part?” You waved your hand in front of his face. “Yeah, I heard,” he caught your hand in his and held on. His skin was warm, soft against your own. Both pairs of eyes caught the gentle nature of his grip, disbelief expressions littering your faces at the audacity to hold on for much longer than necessary, longer than he ever had before.

You let out a small breath, unsure of how to feel as he brought your hand down to the side of his thigh and leaving it there. Just your fingers rested on the muscle, feeling him flex under your touch. With a sly grin, Changbin pulled the TV remote from behind him and pointed it towards the screen, “think we can finish the last few episodes? Or will you fall asleep again?”

The rest of the night went by much too quickly, only because you had, indeed, fallen asleep. To be fair, even though you’d only had a bit of wine, it was still enough to make you tired. That on top of the already tiring day you had and Changbin cozying up next to you, how could you not? You’d woken up later the next day in your bed, tucked in with a bottle of water on your bedside table and a note next to it. Fucking gentleman. Changbin had to leave for work but wrote that he’d made some coffee and didn’t want to wake you. He didn’t fail to mention that it was only thirty minutes into the episode that you’d passed out, but the gesture was still cute.

You went about your day as normal as possible, doing chores and whatnot, even texting Changbin a thank you for not watching the show without you, to which he said he did but he’d rewatch it if you promised to stay awake next time. It was so hard not to smile as you read his messages, seeing the chat bubble on his end immediately appearing with every text you sent. So many butterflies, the only way you knew to contain them was to bury yourself in work. That’s what you did for hours, only stopping to take breaks to eat and use the bathroom. An upside of today, your period stopped.

Changbin doesn’t have such a productive day as you, little to his knowledge. He went to work, got into the studio and sat down with his pen and paper and didn’t write a single thing. Not a damn thing. His mind was overly consumed with the thought of you. No way he was ever going to admit to anyone that he spent a good amount of time this morning just watching you sleep. It sounds creepy as he thinks back on it, but he was mesmerized. Knowing the stress you carried on your shoulders and being given the privilege of seeing you so… at peace. Changbin loved every second of it to the point he just swiveled around in circles daydreaming as soon as he stepped foot in the studio. All the members stopped by at one point during the day to say hello and Changbin was sitting in the same position every time, until Jisung had finally took hold of Changbin’s chair and rolled him out into the hallway so the younger could use the room. “Stop marinating in your own self pity. Can’t take looking at your gross, lovesick face anymore.” Jisung had said, slamming the door in Changbin’s face when he went to curse him out. To be fair, it could’ve been the best or worst advice ever. Either way, it finally got Changbin to leave work.

He didn’t know where his feet were carrying him, just that he wanted to lay down and not think anymore. It wasn’t until he was outside your building again that he felt absolutely like going insane. There were so many pent up emotions swirling about inside him and as good as he is with words, this was something he couldn’t articulate. Mixtures of saccharine chaos and patchouli scented whimsicality fills his nose every time he so much as thinks of your name, these specific things so deeply rooted in his association with you. Everywhere he looks, there you are.

As nighttime rolls around, you’re able to comfortably lay in bed without the fear of staining your sheets. That’s exactly what you do, phone in hand and ready to call it a night. You had been laid down for maybe five minutes when loud knocks rapped against your door. Getting up with a groan, you walked out and opened the door, finding a very disgruntled looking Changbin pawing at the roots of his hair. Before you’d gotten the chance to ask why he was here, he pushed past you and kicked his shoes off, pacing back and forth in your living room.

“Don’t speak a single word because there’s something I have to say and if I don’t say it now, I don’t think I ever will. Understand?” Shutting the door, you looked at him and waited for him to continue. “Say something!”

“You told me not to!”

“Say you understand!”

“I understand.”

“You don’t understand!” You moved slowly further into the room, feeling Changbin growing more and more skittish with every step. As you came face to face with him, he put his hands on your shoulders and led you to the couch, sitting you down while he still stood. “You don’t understand how frustrating it is to be around you.” The words made you flinch back, “no, no! I mean, I love being around you. It’s the highlight of my week! But dear fucking god, Y/N. You are the blindest person I know.”

“I don’t–”

“Shut up! Let me finish,” he stayed a few steps in front of you, practically spinning in circles with how quickly he strode in anxiety. Raising your eyebrows, you waited. Changbin took in a deep breath, “You’re so infuriatingly oblivious that it makes me wanna rip my hair out. You can never stay awake long enough to make it to the good part of the show, we’ve been stuck on the same season for the past month! And you never finish your wine! You always fall asleep on me and I never tell you how you drool on my shoulder because I don’t wanna embarrass you. Why don’t you lock the bathroom door?!”

“Should I be defending myself right now?”

“And you can’t follow directions to save your goddamn life! But for fuck’s sake, I hate being away from you.” A small hum of confusion and a head tilt, you genuinely couldn’t think of anything to say. What the fuck was he talking about?

“I spent the entire day with you doing absolutely nothing but watching paint dry and it was one of the best days of my life. Every day with you is the best day of my life even if it’s for just a few minutes. Can’t you see?” Changbin exhaled deeply and came in front of you, dropping to his knees. He took both your hands from your lap and made you cup his full cheeks, staring deep into your eyes. “See me.”

Thousands of thoughts and millions of emotions filled you from head to toe, almost vibrating overwhelmed. You couldn’t believe your current predicament, here was the manliest man you know on his knees in front of you, for you, begging you to do the one thing you’ve been doing for god knows how long.

Involuntarily your lip pouted at the fading adrenaline induced confidence in Changbin’s demeanor, his hands slowly slipping from atop your own that held you in place. Feeling you getting a better grip, his breath hitched in his throat. You held his cheeks so firmly that his lips puckered. “You’re all I’ve ever seen.”

The sheer force of which Changbin sat up to meet your lips would’ve sent you toppling back if you didn’t find yourself falling into him with equal weight. Butterflies, sparks, that feeling, you felt illiterate. It was just right. 

He did nothing but slot against you in a frenzied yet calculated rhythm, finding comfort in the way your lips fit so perfectly against his. Large palms slid from your hands up your arms and back down your torso, only to settle on your hips and tug you closer. Changbin fit himself between your knees and made sure to have you flush against him as he kneaded the pajama covered flesh of your ass. You didn’t expect him to heave you up and carry you towards your bedroom, squealing as you were dropped onto the mattress.

“What am I gonna do with you?” He muttered, kneeling onto the bed while tossing his shirt to the floor. Daunting Changbin was, a new flame behind his eyes that made you cower until your back hit the headrest. “Don’t run away from me. I’ve waited so long already.” He caught your ankles and you were dragged towards him again, belly up at his mercy.

His lips had a hard time parting from yours even as he stripped you naked, all done with a smitten smirk which you could feel within every kiss. A sense of security washed through you as his hands roamed anywhere and everywhere, firmly caressing any plump inch of skin he could find. Changbin took a particular liking in the curve of your hips and ass, loving how delicately supple your skin was. He kneaded it like a cat, moaning into your mouth as you squeezed the muscles of his pecs.

Then his hands traveled down, hiking your knees around his torso and feeling the wetness of your arousal. His thick fingers slid through your pussy so easily, slick echoing lewdly and only adding to the adulterous scene. He didn’t look away from your glistening folds, flat out staring with all intents and purposes and making your face heat up. With a pout on your lips, “stop looking at it like that. You’re making me shy.”

Changbin’s head fell back in a mocking chuckle, “shy? Please, not my fault you have such a pretty pussy.” He kissed you again before you could feel any more flustered.

It was impossible to feel anything of the sort when he whispered sweet nothings every chance he got. Every break of your lips Changbin took the opportunity to mumble something he loved about you that you didn’t even realize about yourself, “always smell so good, sometimes I spray your perfume on my clothes when you’re not looking. Always wanted to pull your hair, maybe that’ll be a little treat for next time. These hips? Oh my god, wanna just eat you whole.” He bit loving marks from your neck down your chest and trailing further until he came to the skin just below your belly button. There was where he left an abundance of bruises, turning varying hues of purples and reds to line the expanse of the area. It was like your own personalized garment, customized by him made just for you. Changbin didn’t leave your hips unattended, decorating the hinge where your thighs met your hips just the same.

Your cunt was throbbing now, so incredibly turned on but growing too impatient for your own good. As much as you appreciated his thoroughness, it was getting harder not to simply cry at the need that made your stomach churn. Threading your fingers through his hair got his attention, making his eyes meet yours from between your legs. Wordlessly you used your other hand and spread the lips of your pussy with two fingers, inviting.

He took a single long, fat lick up the center of your entrance. The warmth made you cry out for more but Changbin pulled away, refocusing his attention on the backs of your thighs and pushing your knees to your chest. Like reading your mind, he replaced his tongue with big fingers, inserting just one as he munched on the flesh of your legs. Thumbing at your clit and one digit inside you was almost torturous, he was teasing you by being so close to what you wanted, just not quite there.

“Bin, please. Your mouth–”

“Nuh uh. Let me play, princess. We’ll have plenty of time for more.” Your cunt clenched at the prospect of more with him. More rendezvous, more kissing, touching, feeling him in ways you’d only imagined.

Not long did it take for him to decorate your thighs as well, painting a pretty picture like you were a canvas. What you didn’t see was that he’d been touching himself this entire time, slowly stroking his heavy cock and leaking more precum every time you whimpered. When his thumb swiped rather hard at your bundle of nerves and you whined, Changbin almost came in his hand. He couldn’t take it anymore, deciding that he’d rather die than let your first time together go to waste in his palm.

Unexpectedly he dove into your pussy and gave it one good hard suck, for a moment he recalculated even fucking you because of how sweet you tasted and knowing he’d blow if he truly went to town, but he loved seeing the splotches on your body. It made his skin tingle and feel almost feral, your unblemished skin covered in marks he created. With your taste on his tongue, he quickly came back up to kiss your lips, swallowing your moans as your own arousal filled your senses. “Wanna see your face when I fuck you,” he groaned, taking your knees and starting to maneuver them to fall to one side.

“Wait, wait,” you pushed his chest back. Changbin looked at you, concerned. “I’m clean–”

“Me too. Got tested right after–”

“I’m not worried about that.”

“Then?” The worry in his eyes slightly overshadowed the lust, but just for a second because you broke out into an abashed smile and covered your face with your hands. “Don’t laugh at me,” you muttered and Changbin stole your hands into his.

“Never at you, only with you,” he giggled, too.

You tapped his chest so he could sit up. When you had the space, you tipped your knees to the side and let your spine relax, pops of your back cracking made the two of you break into an unfiltered, obnoxious fit of laughter. Then you twisted to do the other side, only making both of you laugh harder. Changbin huddled over into your chest, trying his best not to suffocate you with his weight. “I said don’t laugh!”

“I can’t help it!” He moved up to hide his face in your neck. “That was the cutest thing I've ever seen.” He composed himself enough to plant reassuring kisses to the junction and lean back again. Still on your back, he towered over you and reached down to brush your hair from your face. Warmth spread throughout your body as he just looked at you, nothing sexual of the nature whatsoever, admiring.

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but I think you have a staring problem,” you whispered, gazing at him exactly the way he was at you.

“Only for you,” he pinched your cheek then distracted you with another kiss before continuing to lay your knees to one side of your body.

Taking your hand in his, Changbin aligned his cock with your entrance and pushed in, your nails digging into the top of his hand as he did so. Gently he came to become fully sheathed within your walls, patiently waiting for you to adjust. His free hand ran over the deepening blemishes on the back of your thigh, a proud smirk on his face. Your cunt clenched and he shivered, “more, please.”

He used the hand on your thigh to push your knees harder into the bed and your back popped on last time. When you both laughed, your walls constricted around his dick tightly and stuttered his laughter into a moan, toppling on top of you. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, don’t do that! I’ll cum!” Changbin’s voice still filled with giggles.

Even if the two of you were nowhere near as intense as you should’ve been, the moment was still enjoyable all the same, just in a different way. There was no forced intimacy or awkwardness that came with seeing someone naked for the first time, only comfort and warmth and smiling until your cheeks hurt.

Changbin loved the sight of you stuffed full of him, covered in his marks. That made his brain flip from zero to one hundred, glaring at your pussy and mockingly tilting his head. Oh, he wanted to take a picture of you, pretty in all your glory and creaming around his cock. Every bit of you was on fire, only getting hotter with the sweet praises he was singing for you. “Pussy like heaven, fuck– have I died? So, so good.

“You’re so beautiful like this, wish I could tattoo you with my name. Wouldn’t that be cute, baby? Would you want me to do that? Cover you with pretty words while you cum all over my cock?” Your pussy pulsated at the idea, imagining Changbin writing obscene things all over your body. It’s one thing to him to be saying these things, but having them in writing, his writing, that was something else entirely and it turned you on to no end.

“Oh, you do like that. So dirty, princess. Tell me, what else do you want?” He kept his thrusts slow and deep, working you up much too leisurely that you were on the verge of crying. Changbin could see the tears welling in your eyes, smiling and teasingly tapping the underside of your chin again. “Don’t cry, baby. I’ll give you whatever you want, just tell me.”

Even if it was obvious what you wanted, he was still making you work for it. You reached down to pull your ass cheek up, spreading your pussy lips wider for his viewing pleasure. Changbin groaned, deep from within his chest and his eyes rolled back. “Wanna cum,” you mumbled, fingernails raking over the deep bruises over the backs of your thighs.

“Am I not doing good enough, princess? Need more?” That wasn’t necessarily what you were saying, but it was his way of working himself up even more than he already was. All you did was whine and nod your head, feeling so much at once. “Okay, okay, I’ll give you more.”

His hips picked up speed, skin slapping skin ringing throughout the room. Changbin picked up your top leg and held it in the air to let him fall deeper into you while the other kept a handful of your ass. His fingers dug into you, pulling at the skin to use as leverage to slam harder into your cunt. As you moaned incoherently and arched into the sheets, Changbin leaned over your body and fell into short staccatos of thrusts, keeping your sweet spot from feeling lonely for too long. You weren’t thinking about anything except the building heat in your stomach that only got hotter when you felt his lips attach to your neck, nudging your face to the side for more access. The feeling of his teeth nipping at your sensitive skin made you shiver.

“Better, princess? You’re loving this, aren’t you? Just laying there being pretty and taking everything I give you. Who trained you this well?” You shook your head, no, unable to fully process his words. “No one? I knew you were naturally perfect. Perfect pussy, fits me like a fucking glove.”

You were so close, his words doing you in more and more as he kept running his mouth. Changbin was in the same state as you were except he was unable to stop talking, saying everything he felt as he felt it like a broken record. But you loved it, and loved how easily he could make you melt. The building lava in your gut just needed a little more of a push to flood, you grabbed Changbin by the neck and met his lips while raking your nails through his hair. The way he moaned into your mouth was more than enough ear candy to make your orgasm hit you, hard and for so fucking long.

Changbin tried to fuck you through it, but your cunt had a vice grip as you clenched and convulsed around him, eventually milking him to completion just the same. Of course a guy who hadn’t felt the warmth of another person for so long would have a lot of cum to give, but he was on a whole other level. His orgasm was just as long as yours and filled you to the very, very brim with his seed, spilling out the sides of where his cock kept you plugged. 

Sweaty bodies on top of one another, fluids drenching various places, heavy breaths filling the room, there was no place he’d rather be as Changbin’s head finally cleared. Post nut clarity, you were positively glowing, radiance embodied in his eyes as he watched your eyes flutter open and brush your hair from your face. Changbin peppered your cheeks with kisses, causing you to giggle and hold him closer, but he accidentally moved too fast and made you wince as his softening cock shifted. He told you to hold still as he went as gently as he could to remove himself, awestruck at his cum soiling your pussy. He’d almost raised a mass again, but looked away before he could.

Stealing a random shirt off the floor, he wiped away the residue and tossed it aside again to flop on the bed next to you. His arms wrapped around your neck, muscles almost suffocating you in the warmest way. Legs tangled, heart beats easing, you were close to falling asleep again.

“Do I really drool?” Your voice was muffled by the soft skin of his pecs, slightly nuzzling your face tighter into them.

Changbin froze for a second before lightly chuckling, “no, of course not, princess. I was joking.” Hearing the slight sarcasm in his voice, you whined and attempted to free yourself, though that was impossible with the headlock he had you in. Changbin wrangled you into staying still, kissing the top of your head and tightening his arms, “okay, you do. But it’s okay! I love being covered in your spit.”

He playfully licked your cheek as you tried to protest, kissing you more to ultimately shutting you up and fall victim to his body heat, and Changbin’s head was empty, entirely empty. Nothing left but tender touches, patchouli, and wondering how the hell neither of you realized that this was where you were supposed to be.

-

tags: @sensitiveandhungry @babebatter @aliferousminho @changbinluvr @epiphanynaffit @fawnpeaks @linovely @dumplinbokkieracha @finnydraws @naturules @djeniryuu

#stray kids #stray kids smut #stray kids fanfiction #skz smut #stray kids changbin #skz changbin #changbin smut #seo changbin smut #changbin x reader #changbin x yn #changbin x you #seo changbin #softdom!changbin #softdom!changbin x reader #skz ff #stray kids fanfic #stray kids fluff #skz fluff #changbin fluff

[toournextadventure]

Hiii ! I just came across your writing and I gotta say, I’m really liking it ! Especially the Winclair x reader :) I have a suggestion, Winclair x overly protective Reader, finding out reader injured/killed someone because they said something degrading about Wednesday or Enid, or tried flirting/getting with them. Keep up the great writing :]

Bestie I am ALWAYS down to write a feral, protective reader with Wenclair 😎

stunning, murderous little thing

Enid shouldn’t have been surprised when you walked into the apartment bedroom with a bloody smile and dripping, bloodstained clothes. Your smile wasn’t as sadistic as Wednesday’s, but there was a very specific sense of danger behind it. A sense of danger that, truthfully, only you could really muster.

“Who was it this time?” Wednesday asked without even looking up from her typewriter.

“That punk from Enid’s Econ class,” you said as you tried to lick some dried blood off one of your fangs. “You know, the one that called you a mangy mutt that needed to be muzzled?”

“Is he still breathing?” Enid sighed even though, judging by your current state, she knew the answer anyway.

“He’s not dead,” you said indignantly. “He just wishes he was.” You made the move like you were going to fall on the bed where Enid was laying down.

“Don’t!” Enid shouted. Mid-fall, you missed the bed by only an inch before crashing to the floor.

“The fuck?” You asked as you sat up, rubbing your head with bloodstained hands.

“You are not getting blood on our sheets,” she said with a pointed finger in your chest. “That’ll be the fifth time this month.”

“Sixth,” Wednesday chimed in. “Don’t forget the supposed accident.”

“You guys can’t hold that one against me,” you whined, “it was an accident.” Both women turned to look at you with disbelieving eyes. “He’s the one that ran into my elbow.”

“Go wash off,” Enid demanded, “and maybe I’ll consider letting you back up on the bed.”

“Are you two going to help me?” You asked, waggling your eyebrows in false seduction. It was rather ridiculous.

And yet.

“Come on,” Enid sighed even though she was smiling back at you, “before you stain everything else.”

“You coming, Willa?” You asked when Wednesday still made no move to get up.

“My writing time is not over,” Wednesday said simply, “so no.”

Enid saw the sparkle in your eyes before you made your move. There was no time for her to even attempt to stop you before you stood behind Wednesday, primed and ready. Poor Wednesday didn’t even have time to notice your presence before you rubbed your hands down her cheeks and neck, down her bare shoulders and down to her arms, smearing blood across her skin. Wednesday’s entire body stilled, leaving nothing but silence in the apartment.

“Oh shame,” you mumbled. “It seems you need to clean up now too.”

It was impressive how slowly Wednesday spun her chair around to look up at you. She was also, though Enid would never say it aloud, extremely attractive when covered in blood. The dark red really brought out the brown in her eyes, truly stunning.

"You can keep one hand," Wednesday told you, "which would you prefer?"

"You can take the left," you mused as you held both hands up. "I mean, you both seem to enjoy the right too much to lose it."

Enid could feel a migraine forming when Wednesday lunged at you and you screamed, running off to the shower with her hot on your trail. Enid loved you both, she truly did. But you were going to kill her for sure.

After that night, Enid and Wednesday had given you one rule; no killing anyone unless you had their permission. One would think this wasn't such a difficult rule to follow, but you certainly did your best to find every loophole possible.

"What if I only maim him?" You asked one night while Wednesday pretended to not enjoy being the little spoon.

"Only with good cause,” Wednesday mumbled in her sleepy voice that she pretended not to have.

You hummed in acknowledgment and pulled Wednesday closer, trying to keep your cool when she did her best to snuggle deeper into your arms. When Enid came home, she found the both of you fast asleep yet still leaving room for her on the other side. All she had to do was slide into bed and the both of you instantly reached for her, pulling her into the cuddle pile.

The day of reckoning appeared far faster than Wednesday and Enid had anticipated.

It was just a simple day, you were all walking out of your last class for the week which you thankfully shared, arguing and complaining because Wednesday refused to help you and Enid with the homework. Typical, of course, she always liked to hold this over you both as leverage for cuddles or kisses. A usual Friday, actually, you expected nothing less.

And then it happened.

“Hey Sinclair, Addams.”

They never seemed to call your name, Enid realised as the two frat boys appeared beside you.

“You two busy tonight?” The taller boy standing beside Wednesday asked.

“Extremely,” she answered without looking up. You kept turning your head between both boys and Enid could see the gears turning behind your sunglasses.

“You should come to the party tonight,” the boy beside Enid said. He sounded far more genuine. “We’ll pick you ladies up.”

Enid felt your hand brush against hers as the boys kept talking. It wasn’t the gentle touch you usually gave out freely while walking around campus, but a fist. Oh no, she thought when you ran your tongue over your teeth. More importantly, over your fangs.

“Is this a good enough cause?” You asked; neither of the boys even paid you any attention.

“Yes,” Wednesday said simply.

Oh, your smile was terrifying.

“Hey guys,” you said, finally drawing the boys’ attention, “I got an 8 ball in my bag, want some for your party?”

“Hell yeah,” the taller boy answered quickly.

“Come on, let’s go over here,” you gestured your head toward the alley between campus buildings. The business building; no one would suspect a thing.

They followed you without hesitation, without a single care in their little heads. Enid sighed when Wednesday smirked at their disappearance. She dug her shoe into the dirt, drawing little patterns when she felt Wednesday grab her hand. It helped ease her anxiety just a little bit.

You finally came out from around the building with bloody knuckles and no company.

“I feel much better,” you said with a big smile.

“Still can’t clean up properly,” Wednesday said, wiping her thumb across your lips to erase the small drop of blood.

“Are we finally watching that movie tonight?” You asked as you forced yourself between them, holding each of their hands in yours.

“Only if you make the popcorn,” Enid said.

“You’ve got yourself a deal, sugar,” you said with an even bigger smile and a squeeze of their hands.

Your overprotectiveness was getting worse. Good thing your girlfriends enjoyed it.

#wenclair x reader #wednesday addams x reader #enid x reader

[hellfire--cult]

Baring Teeth {Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader} - Ch. 8

Edit of Eddie: pitifulbaby

Chapters: Masterlist (Go here to see list of chapters, plotline and general warnings.)

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Tropes: Enemies to Lovers, Non-Traditional Omegaverse, Slow burn, Modern!AU, Mechanic!Eddie

⚠️This chapter contains: billy hargrove x reader, smut, oral sex (f receiving), physical pain, hospital mention, dirty talking

wc: 5.4k

Crossposted on: Wattpad & AO3

A/N: I entered with a bang today. Sorry it took so long! I had a lot of work going on but I finally managed to write a few things! Don't forget to go to my profile's masterlist to see my other works!

Anyways, Enjoy! ❤️ And don't forget to always support me by hitting the reblog button or leave a comment!

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Chapter 8

“Shit… Shit, shit, shit!” He groaned in pain, the bindings on his wrists and ankles onto the hospital bed not helping with his writhing. 

He felt as if he were engulfed in flames, as if there was lava all around him, his body ablaze in a red crimson color, and his belly felt a pressure that he never felt before. He didn’t know what was going on. He was at his home, playing his guitar, and then he just felt feverish.

Why was he in the hospital? Wait, it’s not even a hospital, it looks like a private room of some sort, but he couldn’t hear anyone outside. His sight finally focused and he looked to his side, seeing Wayne getting up from his seat with a pained frown in his face, rushing towards his nephew.

“Why am I here Wayne?” 

“They’re specialists in this Eddie, but you’ll be okay son, I promise I will keep you safe.”

A doctor, or that’s what Eddie thought he was because of the white robe, entered the room. He was sort of bald, dark hair, beard and had glasses on, but another shot of pain surged in his belly and he tugged onto the restraints of his wrists. He felt a warm hand press on his forehead to push him back down to the pillow and he saw Wayne’s pained expression looking down on him.

“I will keep you safe.”

Eddie’s eyes shot open, sweat all over his body as heavy breaths left his mouth. He looked over at his clock, signaling 2 AM, sharp. He groaned, sitting up on his bed and that’s when he felt the strong migraine that started to develop. His hand shot towards his head, and he cursed under his breath, feeling warmth expanding towards his chest.

He picked up his phone and immediately opened instagram. Numerous accounts of random girls popped on his profile and his stories, and he started watching them one by one. One posted 2 hours ago, the other 3 hours ago, the next one posted a story 6 hours ago, and then he finally came across Tara. Posted herself drinking at a club 21 minutes ago. 

He winced as he looked up to the ceiling, he knew that the ache was not leaving him unless he did this. He looked back down towards his phone and sent a text to the girl.

‘PIck you up in 20?’ 

Straight forward, no pleasantries, he didn’t care for them really. These women, he just had them for these kinds of cases, not that they knew about it, and the sex was always mediocre, but it helped. It was always empty, thrusting into a hole, no excitement to it, no real attraction except the one they had for him.

He sighed as he waited for the response. He felt another sting in the side of his head as well as if a punch was directed into his belly. 

“Son of a fucking bitch.” He grabbed the ponytail in his nightstand, putting his hair in a bun. Always conditioned to this part of him that wanted to take over his body. Always feeling weak thanks to all the medication he has to take. Always feeling like an animal because of these things he does to women who just want to have a good time.

And he was never satisfied.

But they all had to do. They just simply had to do it for now.

His phone made a ‘Ting’ sound and he looked down on it.

‘Always rdy 4 u bby ;)’

Eddie rolled his eyes, getting up from his bed to get dressed with a groan. It’s just a hole, just a helper, that’s all he thinks about. That’s all it is. When was the last time he had an enjoyable time with someone else? His pleasure was never equal to his partner’s, so he often wondered if he will always be the problem of his demise.

For now, that’s what it seems like.

You fixed your skirt as you took a deep breath in, clearing your throat before going into the meeting room where your client was alongside your boss and other editors.

Be professional. It’s your workplace. Behave.

You opened the door to find your Boss, Liana, sitting at the very end of the table. On her right was a man in a suit, then you found your co-editor in this article, Tony, and then on Liana’s left side was Billy Hargrove, smiling at you, no, smirking at you with mischief in his eyes as the chattering of the room dimmed down as you entered.

Your belly filled with knots as you locked eyes with him, clearing your throat slightly as you noticed that the only available seat was right next to him. 

“Good morning.” You called out and Liana beamed up at you, calling out your name. You had an exceptional relationship with your boss, it was far from friendship, but the trust was there as well as confidentiality. She had trusted you with small projects, then bigger ones, and now this would be the second huge project you would do for the magazine, but this time it is only you. Last project you shared it with Robin, when she actually put a little bit of effort.

But Robin took this job because it paid, not because it was her long term dream, and you understood that. You actually studied Fashion and made your way to get an Editor degree. Your passion stood here, in the background of the flashes of cameras and interviews. You preferred pen and paper, to voice out the new trends to long term designers, or show off new ones to the world. Entrepreneurs, even people you had scouted on TikTok and Instagram.

You wanted to shove the great chain industries away, for fresh material. Balenciaga, Gucci, Louis Vuitton, that’s just what they are. Names. Fashion wise it was too old, too bland, too antique. And then, on TikTok, small businesses of high fashion popped up, people that made these dresses and clothes out of pure love and ambition. You wanted that in the new world, in the new generation. 

But for now, you have to stick to big companies, and hope that next project you will be able to talk Liana into bringing a new designer for the photoshoots.

“Please, take a seat! We are discussing our meetings with our next clients.” You walked around the table, taking a seat next to Billy, who shot you a smile. Liana interrupted again in order to present you to Billy, thinking you two haven’t met before. You were about to correct her that you actually met Billy before by coincidence, but Billy just grabbed your hand and placed a kiss on your knuckles, making your cheeks redden slightly at the gesture.

“Beautiful name. Cannot be happier that a woman like yourself will be guiding this project.” He says into your hand, his warm breath hitting your skin which sends goosebumps all over your body and you could only stare at his blue eyes. Liana chuckled under her breath and that made you snap out, pushing the butterflies in your belly aside, taking your hand away from him.

“Nice meeting you too, Mr. Hargrove. And thank you for that flattery.” You finish saying as formal as possible, sitting down right next to him, putting your suitcase on top of the table. Liana sat down again with a content sigh as you fished your papers out of the leathery case.

“Okay, so, we know Curtis Delore wants more details on these designs, wanting to change it a bit to put on you Mr. Hargrove. He wants to buy the blueprints on these–”

“Actually…” You cut Liana off and your boss already knew you went a step ahead, a smile brooding on her red lips. Liana can always trust your diligent work, and she could see the passion you have for this industry and what it could be. So, she let you continue. “I took the time to contact Millie, and I may have sent her a copy of this article so that she could pass it onto her boss.”

“I already love the mention of Millie.” Liana says and Billy and his manager only looked with confused faces to one another, to then go back at you.

“I got a call this morning from Kim Jones himself that he wants to purchase the blueprint for the next collection and he is also very interested in the model himself for the campaign.” You say with a smirk on your face and Liana simply cheered in excitement. That meant that the design is now valued almost ten times than what it was going to be originally purchased at. Billy was still confused and looked at his manager, Ralph, who cleared his throat to catch both of your attention.

“Excuse me Ladies, who is Kim Jones?” He asked and you slid one of your papers towards Billy and then one towards Ralph. His eyes bulged out of their sockets as he looked up at Billy, who almost had the same expression in his face. 

“You got me to model for Dior? Dior Homme?” Billy slowly turned his head to look at you and you still had the snicker in the inside of your cheek, giving him a shrug.

“It’s a possibility, if you do desire to take it that is.” Billy looked at his manager, then smiled widely, throwing himself back on his chair, running his hands through his hair out of pure happiness. In his career, the only big gig he got was the Chanel advertisement, clothes wise, he didn’t get high couture brands to pick him as their face or body. 

But, the Chief Designer of Dior Homme was actually interested in him. 

He felt his chest almost exploding as he looked at the table and saw the three people all around him chatting excitedly. They were talking about numbers, and possibilities but Billy’s eyes could only look at you. How your mouth moved, how your eyes sparkled with ambition and he couldn’t help but drown in the sound of your voice.

And oh, how he wants to fuck you into his mattress for what you just did for him.

He really wants to show you how grateful he is. How happy you just made him by giving him an opportunity like this, despite him trying to make a move on you. You didn’t take it as offensive, and you didn’t push him away completely because of it either, you didn’t butcher his opportunity to show him a lesson, but you even gave him a bigger chance. 

And he really wants to make it up to you.

Once the percentage of the gainings were talked about and how Billy’s patronage with Dior would give a small percent to the company, the meeting finally ended. 

“Ralph, may I speak with you for a second? It’s just a legal matter.” Liana says with a smile as she guides Ralph to her office. You sighed in contentment, your insides up in flames at how well everything went as you turned into the hall to go to the elevators. You cannot wait to tell Robin about this, or maybe you shouldn’t. You don’t want to rub this in her face, because this would have given her a lot of commission if she were still in the team.

Maybe you can tell her as if it’s not a big deal, or just simply not tell her anything at all. But you needed to tell someone, because this was a big step, and you couldn’t– 

Your thoughts were completely cut off as you felt a hand grip onto your bicep, guiding you into a storage room that was near the hallway you were crossing. Your eyes widened in the darkness, brazing onto your suitcase to swing it, when the lights turned on above you. You turned around to find blue eyes staring down at you with an intensity that was making your knees grow weak. 

The sound of a lock was heard in the room as you took a step away from the man. He was a model, yes, but what if he was a psychopath? You didn’t know the guy, and now he has you locked up in a storage room in the building where you work. 

“Um, Mr. Hargrove–” He put his hands up for you to stay silent as he looked at you, a smile drawing on his lips which was making the butterflies in your stomach flutter all around.

“Billy…” He reminded you and you blinked while staring at him, feeling your throat going dry as you saw how his eyes moved around as he tried to find the words to say. Was he nervous? “I wanted to thank you. I mean, apart from Ralph, no one ever put that much faith in me, or my work before.”

You were stunned. He was actually grateful for what you did, and that made your chest go warm at his actions. It saddened you slightly that no one paid attention to him before, because Billy was beautiful, and sexy when he had to be. He has multiple faces that people can possibly use, and you were happy to be the one to introduce him to that chain of possibilities. 

“It’s my job Billy… But I am glad this can help you out now, and in the future.” He gave you a nod as you kept smiling at him but that smile slowly lowered as he took one step closer, tentatively. His hands reached for your suitcase, taking it from your hands to put it on the floor. Your eyes widened and your throat went dry as he looked down on you. 

His eyes were lustful, but the tint of red on his cheeks told you that he was excited. The gaze he was looking at you with was enough to make your core clench, and your belly burn with intensity as he took another step towards you. You didn’t notice that you were taking your own steps back, not until you felt the cold wall against your back. 

You have to talk, you really have to talk, tell him that he is crossing the line, that you were sort of his boss in this situation, but his eyes. There was something in his eyes that was not filled with lust.

Billy was admiring you right now. 

“If you’d let me, Mousy…” He slowly starts kneeling in front of you, your eyes widening as your breath gets caught in your throat at the sight. This supermodel, this way too handsome of a man, was kneeling in front of you, and your whole body broke into a sweat. “I would like to show you just how grateful I am…”

“Y-You don’t have to do it, it’s part of my job–” His right hand raised up, brushing on the side of your left thigh, slowly, fingertips as light as feathers, and your skin grew goosebumps thanks to it. You shivered at the touch, and your belly turned with anticipation at what could happen right now.

“I want to. You don’t know how much I want to.” And Billy doesn’t say it, but he never wants to. But you, you are different. He wants to please you, ultimately make you see stars, helping you to relax, to untangle yourself from the everyday nerves. You gulped and almost let out a small groan when his fingers dug into the skin of your thigh. 

“B-Billy, I don’t know if we should–” You tried to stop this, but you didn’t really want to. Your excitement and your nerves were moving all around your body, going through your veins from head to toe, warming you up and making your heart pump even faster to keep you conscious. 

“Let me eat you Mousy… I need to taste you, god how I want to taste you…” He wasn’t even looking at you as his fingers creeped under your skirt, going up, leaving a trail of fire at each graze of his touch on your skin. You looked up at the ceiling as your breath started picking up. 

“I won’t do anything to you later.” You state, putting your foot down to see if he will stop his movements when he realizes he is not getting anything out of this. But your eyes widened when you felt his fingers hook with the elastic of your underwear, and slowly slide it down your legs. You looked down to see blue irises staring directly into you, a lustful look hiding behind his black blown pupils and he said the next words without a smirk, a smile, or anything at all that would tell you he was playing with you.

“I am doing this because I want to. Not because I expect anything, Mousy.” All your life, you met men that wanted to take or wanted something in return for what they did to you. Women were a different thing, there was no way around it when it came to that, one has to get off the other and that’s final, but men really don’t care about that. 

He urged your right foot to step out of one of the holes of your underwear and then you felt him raise your left leg up, your breath getting stuck in your throat as he hooked your under knee over his shoulder. You gasped when you realized he was staring directly at your center, and you tried to pull your skirt down for him to not see, a deep blush covering your entire body at how open you felt.

He tsked at you, and with his right hand he gripped your hand that was pulling your skirt down and looked up at you with a shake of his head. Your underwear was dangling off your left ankle and your hand was moved away by him as your other helped you stay stable against the wall. He smirked as he bunched up your tight skirt up, going over your ass so he could have a clear view in front of him

In all honesty, you could have avoided this situation. He didn’t seem like a guy who would take a No like a complete offense. He would have let you go the moment you struggled a little bit, but you didn’t. Because you felt the desire the moment he closed the door on the two of you. The tension that has been building up for the past week. 

And wanted nothing else than for him to continue.

“Fuck– Let me thank you properly Mousy… I’ll make you feel real good.” He moved forward, and you felt your whole body shake in anticipation as his breath felt closer and closer on you. Your eyes widened when he blew a bit of air on you, and you realized thanks to the coldness that you were already wet. And he didn’t even touch you yet.

He chuckled as he saw the glistening of your slick, licking his lips as he pressed a kiss above your clit, just gently, teasingly, and you bit on your bottom lip to hold back the whine that wanted to come out of your mouth. He raised his hands up, and got hold of your ass, making your lower body lean forward to him and your hand immediately shot to his head as the other held onto the wall because you needed stability.

His smirk widened as he looked up at you and you stared down at him, alarmingly, because you realized that you fell into it. You grabbed onto his head. A clear invitation. And thanks to that, he was moving forward to press a kiss on your throbbing nub, making you squeal slightly. 

He trembled with excitement at the sound, almost as if he were an animal tasting his prey. But you were no prey. You were a prize. A beautiful prize. And he wanted it, he really did want it. 

His excitement though, betrayed his teasing, and his tongue flicked out to finally get a long lick up your slit, tasting you, and you threw your head back at the sensation, a groan getting caught in your throat. He moaned at your taste, taking another lick for good measure, making your hand clench on his hair. 

“You taste so sweet… Fuck, I think I’m gonna get addicted to you.” And like that, he went in. All in. His tongue lapping your wet folds as if he were a starved man, flicking your clit with the tip of his tongue every now and then and you couldn’t help the breathy moans that escaped your lips. 

Holy shit. Billy Hargrove was eating you out. Out of his pure pleasure.

He gripped into the flesh of your ass to pull you even closer in order for his tongue to go even deeper and finally shove it inside of you to taste your walls. His nose was hitting on your clit just right as he moved his head to the thrust of his tongue. You threw your head back as your eyes rolled to the back of your head, bliss filling your body as you tried to keep your moans as low as possible.

Your grip in his hair shifted, tightening to then let go to rub it gently. He pulled out of your mouth to now solely focus on your clit, putting his lips around it to suck on it while flicking the tip of his tongue against it, and that made you moan out a little louder.

“Fuck, Billy–” He moaned against you as you called his name as if it were a prayer. He let go of your clit, to repeatedly flick it with his tongue, making your hips shake slightly at the feeling. Oh, he was going to be the death of you today, but how long has it been since someone took care of you in this way?

How long has it been since someone cared enough to do so?

His left hand left your ass cheek, to move to your front. He was sucking onto your clit as his index finger touched your slit, coating it in your fluids to lubricate it before pushing it inside, slowly and tentatively. You took a sharp intake of breath at the intrusion, but loved it nonetheless, the grip you had in his hair tightening at the feeling. His tongue never stopped moving on you as his finger started going in and out, in a slow pace. 

You were trying to keep your moans as low as you could but you had nothing to cover your mouth with. Both hands were occupied with something. One was on the wall to keep you from falling and the other was in blonde curls. You wanted more, you needed more. Your belly was starting to pulse, and burn for him.

He pulled away from your clit to take a look at you, and what he saw made the bulge in his pants, which was already hard enough for the buttons to pop out of his jeans, simply twitch. Your face was completely flushed, your eyes half closed from the pleasure you were feeling, and breathy moans were escaping your lips.

But his name, his name was coming out of them as well.

“Can you feel it doll? How thankful I am for what you did?” He licked his lips with a smirk as you whined at his words. He will have his chance on being the one in control some other time. Right now, he had to show you how happy you made him today. So he will return the favor. 

“Billy, I need to…” Your words got stuck in your throat as his finger kept thrusting into you but it wasn’t enough. The squelching sound of your wetness could be heard in the small room, making your belly turn in embarrassment and arousal at the same time. He hummed as he pressed a kiss to the thigh that was draped over his shoulder.

“What do you need, Mousy? I’ll give it to you… Anything you need. Anything you want.” And there was a hidden message behind those words, a message that only Billy knew about. He nibbled on your flesh to urge you to talk and you gasped slightly at the bite, looking down at him.

“I want to… I want to cum, please…” You beg of him and he almost fainted at how good you sound, at how pornographic your voice is like this. Breathless, with choked up moans in it. With his name stuck on your lips, your legs trembling over him, and he was glad he decided to show up to the meeting today. He was gonna let Ralph handle it, meet you afterwards as he snuck away from his manager, but this was much better. So much better.

He added his middle finger now with his index one, and your mouth fell agape, feeling the tight coil in your belly starting to snap slowly. He started moving his fingers, thrusting into you slowly at first and he guided his head towards your clit, sucking on it to add to the stimulation. Your eyes widened at the feeling to then clench them closed, your other hand gripping onto his hair as well as your back held you against the wall.

“Fuck! Billy– You’re so good, what the fu–” You almost moaned loudly, but you held it in as soon as you opened your mouth for it. He curled his fingers inside of you, his pace increasing and you were grinding your hips against his face now, your hands gripping his hair tightly to push him into you, for him to keep going, for him to keep making you feel so wonderfully blissful right now, for him to keep moving on you, for him to keep showing you how grateful he is to you.

“Cum on my face baby, come on, I can feel it…” He says into you with a smirk on his lips before attacking your clit again with his tongue. Your breathing became too heavy, your chest going up and down as the knot grew in your belly, and it burned, and it was unbearable until it finally snapped. 

One of your hands flew to your mouth, the other holding Billy’s hair still, pushing him into you as your walls clenched around his fingers, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as you tilted your head back, almost hitting yourself against the wall. You were seeing white, then flashes of stars all around you as he kept shaking his head against you, helping you to ride your orgasm.

He took a deep breath in, breathing heavy when he felt your hand release his hair a bit. Your left leg was shaking over him and he was blown out by how responsive you were to him. He smirked, leaning over to take a long lick of your juices that were already dripping down your inner thighs. You winced at the overstimulation, looking down at him through teary eyes. You gripped onto his hair again, and motioned him to stop.

“Too much– Please…” You were breathless. You didn’t expect your day to turn out like this at all, but here you were. And you didn’t wish to be anywhere else at all. Billy pulled away from you, putting your left leg onto the floor, but not before slipping your underwear out of your ankle. You almost fell, feeling your legs shake because of the aftershock of your orgasm. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, getting up from the floor to face you again.

His knees hurt, his jaw was sore, but his mouth was filled of you, and he wanted more. He needed more.

“Did my thanks go through?”  He asked with a smirk to his face and you looked up at him, with half hooded eyes, your pupils still dilated from the pleasure you just received. His eyes almost widened at the sight. He wanted to kiss you, really badly, taste your lips, make you taste yourself in his mouth. You gave him a tired smirk, making him raise an eyebrow up.

“It did Mr. Hargrove.” Your breath was slowly catching up on you, and you realized your skirt was still up, and you pulled it down, to then look at him again. “Can you give me back my underwear?”

“What underwear?” He says with a sly smirk on his lips that it makes you tremble with desire once again. How did he do it so easily? The butterflies in your stomach reappeared to wreak havoc once more inside of you. 

“The black panties that are on your hand?” You say to him and he slowly puts said panties into the backpocket of his denim jeans, his face coming closer as he talked.

“You came commando today, Mousy.” He was keeping them. He was going to keep your underwear to do god knows what later on. This man, who didn’t ask for anything back right now from you, ignoring the hard bulge that was in his pants, and he just did it out of pure pleasure and also because of the lust he holds for you. You were speechless at his actions, because never once you had a man be this passionate to you. Never this filthy.

He was staring at you, his face as close as he could, breath grazing all of your face and you wanted to dive into his lips, feel them on you, wanting nothing more than to feel how his mouth linked with yours in a frenzied kiss. But he was waiting, patiently, because the line was crossed, but not quite. The next step was yours to take.

“I want to thank you too… How about Friday?” 

His smirk grew as he heard your words, licking the inside of his bottom lip, and his chest puffed in victory. You knew that this might be a one night stand. That his fixation with you will be gone as soon as you two have sex, but you needed him. You wanted him. Fuck the game of cat and mouse.

“Friday sounds perfect… And trust me, you don’t have to thank me Mousy… But if you insist.” He pulled away from you, fixing his hair with a wipe of his hand through it. You gulped as you stared at him and he kept his eyes on yours. He leaned over again, his instincts wanting to betray him, but he stopped as his lips graced yours. Your breath hitched at the touch, and your skin was burning from how aroused you were feeling for him. “God, I want to fucking kiss you.” 

“Friday…” Was your quick response. You knew that if he kissed you now, your one night stand would be at work, and with all honesty, you wanted a whole night with him. You wanted to be able to hear him grunt, moan, and call your name, but you also wanted to scream to let him know how you were feeling.

Because you know, Billy Hargrove was gonna make you scream. And you could hardly wait for it.

“Friday.” He pulled off you completely this time, and you felt the cold embracing you at the lack of body heat. He backed off from you, a smile on his lips as he unlocked the door, giving you a small wink before sliding out and closing the door behind him. The room being void of his cologne now, and you could only smell it 

You finally let yourself slam against the wall, your body shaking as you pressed your hands to your face, feeling the strong heat that was on your skin, smiling widely at what you just experienced. You felt a cold breeze in between your legs, and you clenched your eyes at the feel of your arousal on your inner thighs. You had to go wash yourself.

But that didn’t make your smile falter one bit. You were still trying to believe what had just happened, and not because it was Billy Hargrove. That was a bonus. Someone actually made you feel pleasure, after so long of faking orgasms, of making up excuses to not meet with bad hookups, after taking care of your needs by yourself.

You had to thank Billy properly. It was the right thing to do.

End of chapter 8

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A/N: I know the smut it's not with who you would want it to be, but we need some backstory before we get to the juicy bits u kno. I will avoid future smut with Billy to focus on Eddie, this was just to introduce him like this into Reader's life.

If you wish to be in my tag list, comment or send me an ask!

Taglist: @enam3l @katethetank @seatnights @oliskitten @bebe07011 @seventhlevelofhell @babez-a-licious @arsenicred @bl4ckt00thgr1n @harrysgothicbitch @emma77645 @fictionalcomforts @hellv1ra @sarcastically-defensive17

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fics #eddie munson fanfic #stranger things #fanfiction #eddie munson smut #eddie munson ff #eddie munson x fem!reader smut #alpha!eddie munson x omega!reader #omegaverse #alpha beta omega #billy hargrove #love triangle #slow burn #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson fandom #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson stranger things #eddie x you #eddiemunson #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson enemies to lovers #enemies to lovers #eddie x y/n #eddie x reader #eddie x fem!reader #fluff #smut #billy hargrove smut

[aimlesswalker]

I just want to be some guy

As a trans man, I don’t really feel like I belong anywhere in the lgbt+ community because I’ll never be attractive to anyone (which is why I ID as queer but even then I feel outcast) and it…. it really hurts sometimes. I’m simultaneously too masculine and not masculine enough.

in the men who are attracted to men spaces, most people when they see me think I’m a twink because of being short/small and/or for being trans/nonbinary. They think I’m hairless, feminine, boyish, submissive, etc. I’m…. at this point in my life I am really really not. Testosterone has made me male and everything that entails. I’ve gained (healthy! good for me!) weight and my stomach sticks out, I’m covered in body hair, I am partway to balding. All the things that are conventionally unattractive about men. All the things that are demonized in trans men. I’m too masculine to fit their idea of a nonbinary person. But masculine in “the wrong way”. I have to either be muscular/fit or small and hairless to be wanted here. I don’t even count as a bear, you’d probably just call my shape a “dad bod”. This isn’t just some vague feeling I get in these spaces- people have legit said to me “oh I love twinks” or “oh I love femboys” and I have to awkwardly explain that no I’m not one actually. I’m not what they want me to be. And I’m really tired of people placing that expectation on me- that I’m a slender hairless twink who is submissive and likes bottoming. Just because I’m small and/or trans. so gross. 

and then in the women who are attracted to men spaces well… they’d never look twice at me. I’m short and not at all muscular/toned/fit. Again, I have gained weight, am hairy, and halfway to bald. Bedsides not being conventionally attractive- they usually want a man who can “provide”. I am disabled and can’t work. I can’t drive. I can’t give them flowers or pick them up for a date. I can’t be any of the things they’re looking for in a partner. Being disabled makes me seen as “less than”. Being dependent on other people is a trait that is endlessly mocked in men. I’m not masculine enough. 

so where the fuck does that leave me? I’m not even going to talk about how being aromantic in queer spaces alienates me further. I love testosterone, I love what it’s done for me and how I feel healthier on it. But like. fuck. I don’t feel like I’m ever going to be attractive to anyone. I never get to feel pretty or handsome. I never get to feel happy about my appearance anymore and that makes me so sad. I used to derive so much joy from picking out outfits and accessorizing and applying glittery make up. I’m too sick to leave the house ever so I don’t do those things anymore, besides the fact that I *can’t* present feminine anymore without risking my safety. People would assume I’m a trans woman and act accordingly because they see a man attempting to be feminine. I am fully man and fully nonbinary, but I never get to exist as both at the same time. I can’t be feminine without people invalidating/forgetting my manhood. I can’t be masculine without people invalidating/forgetting my nonbinary-ness. I’m too masculine for nonbinary spaces and too nonbinary for masculine spaces. I just…….. I get incredibly sad about this.

And people generally don’t care??? the sentiment seems to be that trans men who are masculine, who pass, who are stealth, etc don’t belong in the lgbt+ community, shouldn’t be in lgbt+ or queer spaces. They’re not wanted there because of being masculine. These spaces are only for “non-men”. But the second you talk about your struggles as a trans man as a reason for why you should be included, you get pegged as an owo twink femboy to most people. It’s always one or the other (demonized or infantilized) and I’m really fucking sick of it. It hurts. I just want to be some guy.

#transmisandry #transandrophobia #trans masc #nonbinary #trans male #transgender #disability #fey talks #idk how to tag this at all #i hope this will resonate with some people #i've completely given up dating at this point although i dont want to #i just dont have the energy to sift through 99% of the people who want nothing to do with someone like me #I dont feel like I have any community at this point in time even in online spaces #i dont feel like I fit in anywhere and it is incredibly isolating #i wish i could see myself as handsome or attractive in any capacity #can we please stop shaming men for being bald and hairy #can we please stop infantilizing disabled men #can we please stop calling all trans men twinks or femboys solely bc they are trans #sometimes i want to stop T just to be accepted again #but i cant i need the T for my health issues #does being both man and nonbinary at the same time make me multigender?

[enemiestoloversss]

Jealous gaviii

Warnings:Smut,unprotected sex (and there are probably some grammar mistakes idk? English is not my first language sorry!)

Y/N POV

It was 6:30pm.I was getting dressed up to attend a Barça event with my boyfriend.I finally managed to pick a right outfit to wear.It was a short strappy black dress and some black heels.I knew Pablo loved that dress, i wanted to tease him a little tonight.I applied some light eyeshadow and mascara to make my eye features stand out, and I applied some red lip gloss to my lips to make them shine.As I was getting ready my boyfriend Pablo was doing the same.Pablo could possibly be the best boyfriend on the earth ever.He was always so thoughtful and respectful even tho I have to admit we did break up a couple of times and we may had our differences in the past but we'd always run back to eachother.Pablo can be a very jealous type at some point but we'd always get over it.Forgive and forget. Jealous Pablo had always led to make up sex in wich I find incredibly hot in my opinion,it's just a big turn on.Sometimes jealous Pablo can get out of hand, but hey having Pablo is better than not Pablo am I right?;) Anyways I've always imagined a bright future with us,he's just so beautiful and pure and I know that we are going to be stuck with eachother for entirety.

"Y/N" Pablo called, "Are you ready bebé?"

I headed downstairs where he was waiting.

"Oh Y/N you look absolutely stunning baby" he smiled holding and giving you a kiss."Well you don't look so bad yourself" I winked and we chuckled. "Come on let's get going we are gonna be late" He took my hand we led me into his car.I couldn't deny how hot he looked tonight.Dont get me wrong he is always attractive but looking at him in the suit just makes me wanna do things to him.

Pablo's POV

As I was driving I took at small glance at Y/N and smiled to myself.How was she so perfect?How am I so lucky to have this women?She looks absolutely divine tonight.She's wearing that dress again, short black dress with the slit exposing her breasts.And her eyes twinkled exactly like the stars right now.I just wish at this moment I could just fuck her this instant.I won't be able to resist her.

Y/N POV

A cold breeze flew last in the air whilst the stars shine upon us as it glistens in the atmosphere Night falls is what we call it when we first met.It was just a beautiful sight to gaze at.I could be lost in this sight for hours.

20 minutes later we arrived.Most of the Barça players and their girlfriends were already there and I was thrilled.They were like a second family to me.Sira (Ferran's girlfriend) and Anna (Lewandowski's wife) were always so fan to talk to,Frankie and Ansu always Crack the best jokes and Pedri...well Pedri was like a big brother to me and that's what I loved about him.

Me and Pablo held hands as we entered the garden.It was decorated with shimmering lights surrounding us and the tables were set poshly and there in the background was relaxing music playing.

"Pablo!Y/N!You're finally here!" Sira exclaimed as she gave us a hug. "It's good to see you too Sira!" We then met up with the rest of the group and we were just telling stories and having fun.I was hanging around with the ladies whilst Pablo was with the men

"Sooo...Y/N" Sira started "How's you're sex life with Pablo?" My eyes widened and I almost chocked on my drink. Typical Sira TY-PI-CAL SIRA.... "Sira!What the hell!" She smirked as the rest of the girls laughed "Come on Y/N.The chemistry is real between you.Pablo is definitely the one you need to keep the hold of. Besides do you remember the time in the dressing room when I walked in on you and Pablo Fu-" "Alright Sira I think we have had enough from you today" I laughed. "But what about you and Pedri?" Anna said is there any tension between the pair of you.I mean I've seen Pedri has his eyes on you for a couple of months." "Wait what?Me and Pedri? I don't think so.Hes like a brother to me I'd think it'd be wrong if he had feelings for me that was more than that" "Aww this is sweet Y/N.This is one of the things I love about you"Anna said. "Aww thanks Anna" "I think dinners ready!Come on girls!" Sira said.

One hour after we ate it was slow dancing time.Pablo took my hand and led me to the dance floor.I gripped into him as he put his hand behind my back and his other hand holding mine.Being in his touch was like heaven, everything was just so right about him.His personality,his hair,his face, his scent, everything.i grabbed onto my boyfriends neck and started to pepper him with kisses to tease him from his cheek to his neck he quietly groaned "Oh Y/N do you have to do this now" he said and smiled than I took his lips and smashed them into mine."Bebe you drive me absolutely crazy" I giggled "I know." You both gazed at the sky."Night falls." You both said and looked at eachother and smiled.He gave you a peck on the head.From the other side of the garden I saw Pedri and he gave me a smile as I exchanged one back.Minutes later Pablo's phone rang "Hold on a sec bebe let me take this." He said and he kissed my cheek before he went inside.

I sat back down on the table and poured myself a drink and Pedro came up to me and held out his hand "Come on love let us have a dance." I didn't wanna be rude and reject him so I politely took his hand and took me to dance.His style of dancing may not be the same as Pablo's but it was still somewhat calming."Have I mentioned how ravishing you look tonight?"he smirked and kissed my hand."No you haven't but thank you." I blushed. "Than my apologies love,you look extremely extraordinary."I looked down at my toes for the compliments he gave me as as my cheeks changed with a tint of pink but he held up my chin "No need to be shy little one."he smiled.He held me close wich felt slightly odd for some reason but he was my friend so why would it be odd?

A few minutes later Pablo returned from his phone call and was standing there,staring at me and Pedri dancing.I caught him noticing and he stormed out. "Pablo!"I called and looked back at Pedri "I'm really sorry!" I left to catch up Pablo. "Pablo, where are you going?"

"What do you think I'm doing Y/N?going home"

"You can't!"

"Why not?"

"Pablo why are you doing this?"

"So you actually care for me?Why don't you ran back to Pedri you both seemed pretty comfortable there?"

"Oh, so this is what it's all about,me and Pedri? We were just dancing! It was nothing he was just trying to be polite!"I fired

"Polite?No Y/N he's jealous.Hes jealous that I have you.Pedri has always liked you how are you so fucking blind to see that?"

"Pablo, you have to grow up he's just a friend who wants to take care of me."

"Take care of you?That's my job!I'm your boyfriend and it's my fucking job to take care of you Y/N!" He spat.

"You know what Pablo?!You can shove your jealousy right up your Dick coz I'll just leave without you!"

This was the moment of realization.I didn't mean to say those words to him.I felt guilt rushing upon me.i could see the anger in his face.We may have had arguments before but I haven't seen him filled with this much anger and jealousy in a while.

"Get in the car now."

"Pablo I didn't mean to u jus-"

"NOW." He raged

I can tell that this wasn't going to end well.He's never raged at me like that before.Tears were starting to form and slip from my eyes but i tried to hold it.I noticed he started driving more faster than usual,was he really THAT angry?.We than arrived at the house and he practically dragged me to the bedroom and slammed my back down onto the mattress and he got on top of me.

"Why do you think I brought you back home to the bedroom Y/N?Huh?"

I stayed silent but he slapped my thigh

"I ASKED you a QUESTION!"

"B-because....because you though I was flirting with Pedri?"

"Sweetheart I didn't 'think' you were, I know you were.And how do you think it makes me feel?Seeing my girlfriend have another man flirt with her?"

"Angry and upset?" I almost whispered.

"You were a bad girl today.You know what bad girls get?Punishments."he whispered in my ear and send chills down my spine.

He started to undress me by taking off my dress exposing my naked body and my red lace panties I was wearing.

"Red lace panties huh?You know they are one of my favorites....You know I'd be jealous so I could just come here and fuck you. Or did you wear these for Pedri to fuck you?You fucking bitch!"

"No it's not like that-" SMACK. Another harsh slap to my thigh

"Did I say you could speak?I heard all about your talk with the ladies, about your and mine sex life.About the time Sira accidentally walked in on us having sex?You're such a whore Y/N. I bet you want me to fuck you in from of everyone to show who you belong to hm?If you're gonna act like a whore...I'm gonna fuck you like one"

I gulped.he started to undress himself by undoing his pants exposing his member.

"Look at you sweetheart.Gazing and craving for my dick to be inside of you, how pathetic"

Without hesitation he slid into your cunt and already started to thurst into you hard and rough. I screamed. His dick was pushing in and out of my throbbing pussy. It feels so good yet it hurts so bad.I moaned at the pain and pleasure and the noises filled the room."MM PABLO" I cried,he started going even more faster."yeah, that's it scream my name,scream the name you belong to" I felt my orgasm built up intense heat in my stomach, I need to cum. "PABLO PLEASE LET ME CUM!" "Hold on a few seconds bebe, I'm so close!" He pushed even harder as both of your moans and groans got louder. "Cum for me" he says rubbing my clit. I reached my orgasm and let it go. White,slimy liquid existing my cunt as Pablo did the same.We were both a panting mess.

He than pulled up and laid down next to me, i put my head on his chest.We were laying in the bed cussing another whilst he was fiddling with strands of my hair. "I bet Pedro couldn't fuck you like that" he chuckled. "Hmm, I don't know, we'll have to see..." I fought back jokingly to see his reaction and next thing I know he was pinning me down whilst being on top. "Ready for round two princess?" He smirked.

A/n: Feel free to send me more requests but please try to be specific ty🙏🏼

And before ya'll come for me bc of writing smut js know that I'm younger than Pablo😭

#pablo gavi #pablo gavi imagine #pablo gavi smut #pablo gavi x reader #pedri gonzalez #pedri smut #pedri x reader #pedriandgavi #ferran torres

[captain-jordy]

Play No Games

Pairing: RE2! Leon x Black! Reader

Summary: After the perfect first date Leon finds himself entranced with you…

Content: just pure fluff I think, obsessive behavior on Leon’s part (?), pizza and ice skating lmfaoaoao

Chapter 1, Chapter 2 (coming soon)!!!

WC: 2.4k

Notes: it’s my first fanfic girlies so don’t be too harsh❤️ besides that there’s chapters to this fic actually and like…I just felt like it was too long to have it’s own thing + this was not proofread💀

Leon was a mess.

Just one date with you; just one fucking date and he’s obsessed. It was a simple one too. Casual clothing, possibly health-hazardous pizza joint—it was nice inside, at least—but a simple place for a first date. Leon wasn’t too sure how you two decided on that lame-ass pizza joint, but shit, everything you did that night made him forget the poor choice in environment…and food. He barely knew you too, due to finding each other on a shitty dating app, so he isn’t too sure how he got so whipped, that night with you just kept replaying over and over in his mind.

You were scanning the menu of Del Gino’s. The pizza selections were quite strange; ranging from a classic pepperoni to…cold fish. “How are you liking the selections?” Leon questioned. It was an attempt at small talk. Being a cop forced him to be charismatic and social, yet this woman he just met made him tense. You looked up from the menu and threw a small smile his way. “It’s strange, but I’m not surprised. Cities like Raccoon City always have weird pizza joints, right?”

“Yeah,” Leon placed the menu down and slid it towards the middle of the table, “we should probably play it safe and get a pepperoni.”

You immediately shook your head. Leon was a nice guy but he wasn’t impressive so far. Maybe he needed a little push, you thought. “Let’s choose something crazy too. To make this date memorable.” Your booted feet nudged Leon playfully under the table, encouraging him to get out of his comfort zone. “Let’s try caramelized onions, apples, and goat cheese pizza. Sounds dangerous.” You joked. Your voice was softer than usual talking to Leon. It might’ve not been obvious, but you were nervous too. Hands clammy and face warm, who wouldn’t be? Leon was an attractive man; he had a pair of plump pink lips, a nice jawline, and a smooth voice, he was desirable in all the right ways..

But you weren’t completely feeling him for some odd reason.

He seemed…hesitant. Yeah, the guy was a bit awkward, but anyone would be on a first date. Leon stared ahead and was seemingly lost in thought. “Leon?” You questioned. His eyes widened once he realized that he was zoning out. With a small sigh, he shook his head as a blush crept up his cheeks. “Yeah? Sorry about that.” He mumbled. “You’re a risk taker, huh? Cute.”

The more he looked at you, the more enamored he became. Braided hair sitting perfectly under the dim lighting of the pizza joint, same with your warm skin and glossy lips. If anything you looked like a goddess among the cracked red cushions of the booth he had chosen. He nudged your feet back. His nerves were slowly coming down from their high and finally easing up.

“You think that’s cute?” You leaned forward a bit, clearly entertained with the conversation happening between you two. “You seem like a charmer, Officer Kennedy.” Leon’s face grew warmer at the mention of his job. Being called that title off-field always gave him butterflies, unfortunately…fortunate for you though. “I like to think I am.” He responded.

“You are. It’s in the works as we speak.”

“Oh?”

The blonde looked down at his hands for a second; he was overwhelmed by your gaze. Leon has always had a bit of a timid nature, especially around pretty women, but it didn’t stop him from being talkative. “What do you do outside of…” he threw his hands around, “this?” He cringed at his words. He felt as if it was intrusive but that’s what dates were all about, asking questions.

“I tend to write a lot, considering I’m a journalist.”

Journalist? That’s an interesting career. That is not surprising considering they live in a big city. She seemed like she was just trying to sustain her career among the daily lives of others, asking questions and writing about it. It’s a career where you intrude on others for a living. He could respect that since he wasn’t that extroverted.

Before Leon could answer her a waiter came up to serve their table. Leon winced at the sight of the young teenage boy, who seemed stressed. He seemed like he was a newbie when it came to night shifts. “Welcome to Del Ginos. I’m Mark and I’ll be your waiter today. Anything you two would like to drink?” Holy shit, this kid was a professional. You and Leon shared a look of amusement before turning back to the teen.

“Uh–thank you, I’d like a strawberry lemonade and he’d likeee,” You trailed off with your words and looked at Leon, waiting for him to answer. “Another strawberry lemonade,” Leon answered. You nodded in approval at his choice. It was simple but safe. After discussing your order you and Leon were finally left alone again. There was a brief silence but it was clear you two were giggling over the teen. “He was professional,” Leon muttered. You immediately burst into small laughs at Leon’s comment. The kid was oddly formal about everything so it was a bit silly. What was a simple joke for you was something entirely different for Leon. He wouldn’t consider himself to be a lovesick person, yet around a woman, he was so easily flustered and amazed. Like you, your laugh sounded melodic and sang a harmony that pulled him in. First, it was good looks, but now it was good looks and a laugh. “Very professional.” You chimed.

Just moments later full of small talk, the two pizzas came. Your eyes widened with anticipation at the sight of the pies. Both had a fluffy crust but the normal pizza had the perfect cheese to pepperoni ratio. With a pull of yours and Leon’s slices, it stretched out and revealed how gooey the pizza truly was. But the other…the other was strange. It had crumbled goat cheese with caramelized onions and apples. The odd combination probably went great together but it was still strange to put it on a pizza.

“I’m not even gonna lie…I’m a bit hesitant to try this pizza.”

Leon feigned a glare, “I told you we should’ve played it safe.” He muttered. You rolled your eyes playfully and smiled. “You’re gonna eat this pizza.” Leon wasn’t serious with his words, as told by the small smile perking up. It was cute with how teasing he was. Small smile and was unable to hold eye contact yet he kept teasing. You kicked his feet again.

“Since you’re lowkey a pussy I’ll try it first.”

Leon tried not to laugh at your words, but he let a chuckle or two escape. He watched you scoop the goat cheese pizza in your mouth and anticipated your reaction. There was the tang of the goat cheese, which hit your tastebuds immediately, then the slow-cooked savory taste of the apples—which added some sweetness to the tart, yet savory. But the onions…the onions were perfect. Carmelized and adding to the palette of flavors. It was a strange combination, but he saw how you enjoyed it.

“Is it good?”

“Try it yourself, Leon.”

Leon took a bite and immediately gagged. In his opinion, it was fucking bad. He glared at you again and immediately placed the slice down. “I’m never taking your lead when it comes to choosing again.” He chided. He was a picky eater, got it. A playful grin came to your lips as he gulped down his drink. Leon loved how playful you were about everything. Subtle flirts and jokes on him. On some level, it seemed you were comfortable already and he enjoyed that.

“You will.”

“What?”

Leon watched your pretty eyes twinkle with mischief and your smile grow wider. “You’re gonna let me choose our next date. I bet on it.” Taking a woman’s lead? He always would.

So for him to be outside in the winter cold with you minutes later was predictable. He didn’t want this date to end yet, the both of them didn’t. The two of you walked side by side, hip to hip to protect each other from the bitter cold. Dancing white snowflakes slowly dropped from the sky along with its cool breeze going north. Raccoon City was the prettiest when hit with snow. Christmas decorations up, glistening snow, couples walking hand in hand with children running around. It was a time of joy and Leon was happy he met you. Growing an attachment now was a bit early, clearly, but he couldn’t stop the attraction from growing. He couldn’t stop the fondness either. His eyes kept glancing towards you and checking you out. You were just such a pretty girl that he couldn’t help himself. This time his stare lingered, watching you pull out a tube of lipgloss and apply it to your chapped ombre brown lips. With a few swipes, you popped your lips together puckering them out. Now here they were, glossy and kissable like every part of you. The sight was too alluring so he looked away once again.

“Whatcha gonna do when you get home?” You asked. The blonde turned his attention back to you instead of the Christmas environment of Raccoon City. Your pretty browns stared at him with a state of wonder. Leon looked great in the cold. He had a thick black wooly scarf around his neck, somewhat covering his rose-tinted lips. His nice, firm hands were shoved deep in his coat, he seemed to be one to forget gloves. Your eyes continued to check him out and finally landed on his reddish ears. “Your ears are cold?”

Before Leon could respond you placed your white earmuffs on his ears. “Hey, you don't have to–uh.” He was quickly cut off by your words of affection. “I don’t want my date cold. And I got all these braids to protect my ears. I’m fine.” Leon didn’t try to argue with you. He appreciated the moment too much to go against your words.

“I–okay…thank you.” He breathed out. Leon’s breath hitched at the feeling of your arm hooking around his, pulling him even closer. Were you always this bold? You gave him a cheeky look in response and made an excuse along the lines of, “You looked cold.” Now not only was he enthralled, but he was excited too. Those feelings of excitement were unwanted though, too soon he thought. “To answer your question, I was gonna crash out once I got home. I got a morning shift, unfortunately. You?”

“Sleep. I love sleeping.”

What a simple woman. At this point, they were just walking around aimlessly in the city. It wasn’t a bad sight at all and it was clear you two wanted the date to last longer. Leon was stuck to his thoughts until he saw an ice rink. There were a few people scattered about on it but not many, so he tapped you and pointed towards it. “You wanna try?” He smiled at the sight of your eyes lighting up with excitement. “Of course! You know how to skate!?”

“No.”

Leon’s heart pounded wildly at the feel of your gloved hands on his. The both of you were giggling as you two slowly glided on the ice. His legs shook while yours stayed steady on ice. It was clear that one of you two had experience.

“It’s like rollerskating, you’ve ever been rollerskating?” Leon shook his head no. He refused to speak with the fear of squeaking or some other embarrassing sound he could muster out. Your hands were just really nice to hold. “Jeez, no experience in the skating department I see. I think I can figure it out, just watch.”

You let go of Leon’s hands much to his dismay, but he watched. He kept his eyes on your hips as they swayed back in forth with every subtle push of the blades. His eyes then trailed up to your face to see the slightly nervous look grow into one of confidence. Ice skating wasn’t hard for you due to your experience with rollerskating.

“You’re doing good!” He exclaimed. A small cheer for your victory. A small smile graced your lips as you glided back to him, except, it was fast, too fast. “I think you need to slow down!”

“I don’t know how to!”

That look of confidence soon turned into fear and that’s when Leon knew to brace for impact. “Shit,” he muttered to himself. He knew he couldn’t catch your ass without falling because he could barely stand. With a scream from you, your body slammed into Leon’s, and the both of you fell. He landed right on his ass and you in his arms. Leon shook his head in mock disapprovement. So much for being good at skating. “You can skate but you can’t brake?” He teased. You sat on your knees and glared up at him.

“I least I know how to stand.” Leon released the most boyish laugh ever, making your face heat up in embarrassment. He had a nice laugh. Deep from his chest and genuine. And to think it was all for you. You used Leon to slowly stand up from the ice. It was too cold and too wet to sit on forever. “Come on. We’re done skating.” He looked at the gloved hand you held out, smiling before grabbing its warmth.

After returning your skates and warming up from said events, Leon held the two of your hands as just before. Maybe you were feeling him after all. There was a streetlight right above you two. It had warm lighting, generating some sort of ambiance that Leon knew he’d crave again. The warm lighting was pretty on your brown skin and made you stand out just a bit more. If anything you were the definition of warmth. His pretty eyes met yours and you guys sheepishly looked away. He tried to meet your gaze again and there it was, she was staring him right in the eyes.

“Hi,” Leon whispered.

“Hi.”

“Look, I just wanted you to know I had a great time with you and–could we stay in contact?” It took Leon lots of courage to get that out. He’s surprised he didn’t stutter on his words at least once. Those thoughts are soon rushed away at the sight of your bashful face. From the small bold lines you kept giving him earlier, why were you so shy now? “Please?” He begged.

“Of course…of course we can. I like you a lot. So take me serious, no games Leon.”

He planned on it. Leon planned on playing no games with her.

#leon x reader #leon x you #leon x y/n #leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #resident evil #resident evil x reader #resident evil x you #re2 leon

[menalez]

Hi, I need to rant and maybe get some advice? Sometimes I feel so abnormal because I am a straight woman so I am attracted to men BUT also I don't really feel an inclination to sleep with them or get in a relationship with them. The thing is, I've struggled (like a lot of women) with self-image/ED and having repeatedly seen and heard all the ways men criticize female bodies, I just don't see a point in engaging in any sexual activities with men. Like so many of them literally sound like they don't EVEN like female bodies, why should I have sex with such a person, and it is always a true gamble if the man you meet is exactly like that, cuz so many of them give themselves away on the regular, be it online or in real life. Or, I mean, he might like me when I am at my most ''perfect'' (so constant pressure to maintain that ideal) but say I forget to shave my legs one day, would he be fine with that or go into childish rage and belittle me or cheat. Yeah not worth the risk and many other risks. I've also never descended into ''wild lust'' for men I meet in real life so, don't consider it a loss if you exclude societal pressure to date someone. Men want to freely say all kinds of nasty shit about women then expect women to happily run into their arms... that's not working for me. They think women are naïve. I don't care how it makes me sound, men are not trust-worthy, they will sleep with you then bad-mouth you in the most detached way. Meanwhile I never even entertain negative thoughts on male bodies, I meet so many men who are unattractive to me but I don't make it a point to have Opinions on their features. Like, I don't care about it like that. They are just random people to me. Men though, they will make sure to voice out everything they dislike about a random woman like it's PERSONAL to them. Yeah they can fuck off.

tbh i dont think this makes u abnormal, u have high standards and worry about being hurt by a man bc youve seen how often men disrespect and mistreat other women and u dont want that to be u especially when youve struggled with your self-image and an eating disorder (or multiple idk ur story). to me thats a form of self-preservation and if u feel ur quality of life has not been harmed by this and are totally happy being single and celibate, then go for it! theres many het women who choose to live a similar life and i entirely support their choice and can understand it. people only treat u and make u feel like ur abnormal bc they view a woman's purpose and happiness to be reliant on a man and thats just misogyny at the end of the day

[brookiidookiii]

oughhh jock! jock i love you jock. for the ask

Oh thank you for this. They’re my childhood OTP so I do have a lottttt to say. Sommeliershipping permanently doomed me to only enjoy rivals to lovers dynamics

1. What made you ship it?

First off they are constantly touching each others chests MY GOD. Not to mention how often they get up in each others faces holy shit.

That is ZOKE levels of closeness. Jesus

I think you have to be dumb to not see why people ship it. Also that whole “need to be dominated” scene with dawn, then jo shows up right after that and bosses him around. COME ON. Then the rest of that scene and how it played out. Him poking her chest and then she pushes him away in a way that’s like “oh I’ll show you who’s boss.” Squat thruster ‼️‼️‼️ (why did she do that) Plus she seems to have genuine respect for him which is really nice. She’s given him the most nicknames out of everyone too.

Also 2/5 of bricks confessionals are about jo. The other three times he’s just talking about himself. I thought that’d be fun to mention. Jo wants to feel good about herself and brick wants to be a fashion designer and he can make her cute clothes i think.

I am never going to let anyone ever forget about that “maybe brick and jo wanna kiss and make up?” line UGHHH. Even Chris low key shipped it. There’s just sooo much to them. Also comedy potential with lightning thinking Jo’s a gay twink the whole time and idk maybe there could be something with jock and lightning. I’m convinced at least a few animators shipped them.

Just WIWJWJEN there’s so so so much. She’s the only person who convinced him to go against his code. That man is devoted. And then when she pulled him out of that grave and there was music playing and they zoomed in on them holding hands.. I initially shipped them because when I was younger I was looking for fanart and came across a fake screenshot of them kissing and 9 year old me beloved it was real 🥲 you can imagine my disappointment when they didn’t end up smooching. In the finale they’re constantly next to each other too. There’s way too much going on between them, I also take Jo’s dream about letting a guy win because she found him ‘attractive’ as a jock crumb. + they have a good ship name.

That rock climbing scene where brick talks about his rock wall climbing badge or something and jo seems genuinely impressed for a moment, then he goes on and says how he dislocated his hip and jo is like “oh never mind he’s weird.” LMAOOO. Brick really wanted to show off there huh. They’re both so fucking stupid iwhwnsnens

Plus we know Jo’s type is dark hair and cleft chins. She really needs to kiss her rivals okay

2. What are your favorite things about this ship?

Basically everything I mentioned before. Bricks “need to be dominated” basically confirms that jo would be his type, what can I say. And he calls her ma’am, and is just generally very respectful even when she gets under his skin. I really really love how jo tries to get under his skin, it’s so fun. And brick is slowly losing his mind. Also he didn’t vote for her in ep7, he voted for lightning, and we know that because jo got her marshmallow first, meaning lightning got one vote from brick. That is soo. Yeah. He probably would feel bad if he voted for her. He probably didn’t vote for her in ep4 either.

And he breaks his code for her. Like, his entire thing is never leave a man behind, and jo convinces him to leave everyone behind. And that causes his first elimination but MANNNNN…. He really really respects her. And I really like women who bully their boyfriends, it’s so fun. There’s probably so much more that I could say about them that I forgot to add.

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

When people write their platonic dynamic in fanfics is always so. Meh. They treat it like she just harasses him but he views her as an equal, and she sees him as a competitor she can actually have banter with. Also please stop calling them mlm/wlw solidarity. I’m not saying that because I ship them but because she has made it her life goal to make his as miserable as possible. HOSTILITY.

I’ll make my own analysis on their rivalry, not to be shippy but so people just understand how they interact because a lot of people don’t get it.

Jock is very very special to me. The only way I can enjoy m/f ships is if they’re fighting 24/7. It’s awesome. Plus he’s also the only man I can ship with Jo tbh. Other m/f Jo ships make me like ehhhhh I dunno

#ask #jockjockjock #at the very least they were low key into each other #always send me jock asks #I will never not answer them

[foxydivaxx]

Zosan: Look What You Made Me Do Chapter 5

Sanji will speak to us directly here and boy are you all in for a treat because we finally get to hear from the man in regards to his ahem….perverted dirty mind. Just picture Sanji smirking as he tells you all the naughty things he does. He kinda sounds like Lestat here xD. TW: mentions of sex and abuse

Henceforth, I shall take over the story here since this is my show now. Chopper suggested I write a diary as it helps with my thoughts. At first I thought it would not work given how crazy I tend to be. Turns out it did work as I can now properly digest and dissect my thoughts properly before doing something reckless.

I have always been different. Too kind to many. Too intense for some. Too meek for others. Perhaps that explains my bad luck with women and people in general. Always been a controversial person due to my status as a perverted cook. Many forget I kick ass. But considering my attitude towards women, I do not blame their dismissive attitude.

Truth be told, I kind of took Zeff’s stance towards women too seriously. Listen, I owe that old man my life because he saved me from starvation hence why I take food wastage seriously. So when that man says something, I would stick to it even if it would not serve me any good.

Every single relationship I had prior to Marimo either ended in tragedy or in disaster. I have lost Lord knows how many lovers now. The last thing I want is to lose Zoro. I have always been in love with him ever since the day I met him but did not bother to hook up with him as I thought I was not his type. Yet here we are a happy couple years later.

For years, I have struggled with relationships and my sexual identity. All this is thanks to that useless bastard that called himself my father. I have since disowned him but clearly, he refuses to take the hint hence why he killed Zeff and destroyed the Baratie and everyone in it. He expected me to crawl back to him. Stupid old fool.

As if that wasn’t enough, he had the audacity to send that delusional idiot Akuma after me, pretending to be a pirate with demon powers. Oh how I laughed in my head at that one.

You see the thing about Akuma is that he is a genetically enhanced human like I am. That is why his powers appear demonic. But he has clearly never met a bigger more monstrous demon that could kill him until he met me that is. Yes I can be a demon when you push me that far.

Now why did I mention these two men? Okay, I told the crew about it especially Marimo.

You see, my gentleman image is kind of a mask, an illusion to hide my true sexuality. The ladies must have seen through it and chose not to follow through. I am glad they rejected me because I would not have had the sexual awakening I would have had years later.

Chopper and Zoro both stated that my excessive nosebleeds was as a result of sexual inactivity. They are absolutely right because after Akuma and his guys started fucking the shit out of me day in day out and now Zoro, I feel a lot better.

Oh yeah, I love sex. I will not deny that fact. What made me love sex that much was ironically the way I lost my virginity. There was this customer at the Baratie named Marissa.

Beautiful blonde lady about her early 20’s wearing a beautiful purple qiqao alongside a black coat. She had a welcoming smile and an inviting presence that made every man at the Baratie weak in the knees. Yet for some reason, I attracted her eye. I was just 17 then.

I was trying to be a good boy here, obeying Zeff’s command in regards to not simping after any woman I saw after my young hormones almost lost control when I was just 8.

The woman beckoned to me. I remember freezing in my tracks. Zeff grunted at me, signalling that I go attend to her. I took some small tentative walks towards the woman and gave her a polite smile. How I controlled myself that day is beyond me.

Either way, later that night once I had finished with work, I headed to my living quarters. As soon as I opened the door, my jaw dropped. There was Marissa seated seductively on my bed.

“How did you…get in here?” I say as I immediately close the door behind me. Last thing I wanted was for the old shitbag to find me in a compromising position.

She smiles sweetly and raises up from the bed, gently making her way towards me, like a cat who had just found her prey. “One of your fellow staff members helped to sneak me in here.”

I thought as much. I was in awe of this beautiful lady in front of me. Usually, I do the chasing. So this was a first, the first time a woman would willingly give herself to me.

“I may have to punish some miscreants for that later.But right now…” I then wrap my arm around her waist and pull her closer. “How about you and I have our little moment mon cherie?” I say in the most seductive voice I could muster.

She immediately melts under my touch and without hesitation, locks lips with me. I was a virgin at the time and yet, here I was acting like a pro.

She drove me insane with her gentle touch, the way that hot mouth of hers took my cock and sucked me off. I am surprised I did not lost it there because when someone sucks me off on a good day, I can be quite loud.

Her soft moans were music to my ears as I fucked her that day. I went overboard and fucked her hard. She herself was also a virgin making it even more exciting. That day was amazing. Shame it was a one-off affair. But a good one at that. But that moment began my deep erotic awakening.

It was not just some of the ladies that lusted after me. There a few guys too. One of them followed me to the bathroom one day and gave me a mind blowing blowjob. He also fucked me in the bathroom.

A few of the younger guys at the Baratie have also fucked me as well and it felt so good. Zeff found out and kicked my ass. I did not care and just kept on feeding my sexual appetite. He eventually just let me be. Now, there is a downside to my sexual side which conincides with my nosebleeds.

If I don’t have sex for a long time, I would lose my mind. Yeah you heard that right. I, Black- Leg Sanji am a sex freak. At least I admit it this time.

Whenever we end up on an island, I will do my usual flirting. Now here is the thing; I always knew that Nami and Robin never had feelings for me and that I was never their type. Yet I continued simping for them because well….it was fun. Plus they were beautiful. Still I thought I had a shot with either of them and went for it like the fearless fool I was.

There was also this part of me that constantly wanted love and attention and when I did not get it, I got pissed. Comes with growing up in an abusive, toxic environment. Yet, I also felt I did not deserve any love or affection. So for someone like Marimo to love me the way he does is truly a blessing.

However if a lady showed interest in me, which is rare, that takes me by surprise, especially when I am not being a prude. Unfortunately I allowed my moral code get the better of me and so many people took advantage of my weakness.

For all the gentlemanly shit I do, the truth is I am that boy no one should take home to their mamma. Don’t get me wrong, I can be nice and gentlemanly but the truth that I have slowly begun to accept is that I am a bad boy at heart.

I am so wild and insane and my sex addiction gets the better of me at times. Certainly not something anyone’s mamma wants to deal with.

It’s weird that I refused to acknowledge my sexuality for a long time. I needed release so I would sleep around on the different islands we went to save for a few exceptions.

I couldn’t help myself. Whenever people willingly relieve my sexual frustrations, I oblige them. All that bickering Marimo and I engaged in was him trying to force me to accept myself for once. Ace did part of the job when we started our relationship.

He deserved better than to end up the way he did. I am glad Luffy was accepting of our relationship.

That brings me to Akuma. Now how it happened was this: the fool approached me when I went to the bathhouse alone. Yes Germa has a bathhouse and in said bathhouse, there is an onsen.

I was alone because I needed to separate myself from everyone. I was going through so much shit then and this after I overheard the shit Pudding said about me.

I was still deeply hurt by what she said because I have heard others say similar shit about me and I got reminded of my family and the hell they put me through.

Just when I was deep in thought, I felt a pair of arms wrap themselves around me. I was taken aback by this because as far as I knew, I was the only one in the onsen.

Just then a deep baritone whispers in my ear in the most sinful of ways, “Give into your desires.” He then parts my legs and begins to finger me.

Looking back at that moment, I feel disgusted. So Judge knew that I was bi and decided to weaponise that against me eh? No worries.

What these fools did not realize was that my Haki skills had heightened. So I can read emotions and hearts. So I knew Akuma was planning to use me anyway. Yet I played along because I realized something; he and his stupid crew could be useful.

And so I upped the ante. I became a whore for them whilst gathering enough information to carry out my revenge plot. How did I know Akuma destroyed the Baratie on Germa’s orders? I saw the letter Judge sent to him on his desk. Talk about careless.

Using my Haki skills, I began to manipulate and seduce everyone on that ship. That whole schtick about them being a demon empire? That was all my doing. Yes, I can alter people’s memories and play games with their minds. All I had to do was to seduce them into doing my bidding which is what I have been doing for a while.

I guess the Germa enhancement programme has special benefits especially when my crew mates are being threatened. I love my fellow Strawhats and I will do anything, absolutely anything to protect them. And if it meant selling my body for information, which I have done loads of times, taking my clothes off and getting fucked by Marines and several others, masturbating to distract people, and getting my hands dirty and executing any threats, then so be it.

That is the difference between Marimo and I. He is the warrior whilst I am the spy, the Homme fatale and assassin. I am done being nice. Nice guys always finish last. I am willing to be a monster for the others. No worries, my heart is still there otherwise Marimo would not fall for me.

Speaking of Zoro, he is straight forward yes but he is a great listener. I did not expect him to be that wise. Being a former pirate bounty hunter I guess taught him a lot about people. He can be silly but he is my silly Marimo.

Today, we arrived at an island to stock up on provisions and also take a much needed break. I chose to wore thigh high shorts that showed off my body, especially my most famous asset which happens to be my ass.

Compared to my old self, I walked onto the island with renewed confidence with sex appeal radiating from me. I did not chase after any woman this time around. Instead, all eyes were on me, especially my ass. Jaws dropped as no one had ever seen an ass quite like mine.

I smirk deviously because I secretly relish the attention. Zoro being Zoro wraps his arms around protectively and shoots warning glares at anyone that dares to look my way. That is my ferocious Tiger. Ever the territorial creature. I find that so adorable.

“The motel is right over there. I say we just chill there.” says Nami, pointing at a tall ash grey building a couple blocks from where we were . The gang agreed as we head inside.

Once the accommodations were sorted, we all head into our various rooms. As expected, Zoro and I got a room to ourselves.

“Is it me or does it feel like a vacation?” Zoro asks. I nodded. “Yeah it kind of does. Though knowing the Marines, they are on high alert.”

Zoro snorts. “Yeah. Well, no one touches my baby.” he says with a little growl as he begins to kiss my neck. I giggle and pull him closer. “Come on Daddy. Let’s have some fun.”

He smirked and soon our clothes fly in different different directions as we head towards the bed and begin to another one of our insane sex sessions. We do not even notice Usopp walking in and then out once he sees us naked and Zoro’s cock deep in my ass.

I spread my legs wide so that Zoro can go deeper into me. “Ah yes!! Ah Gimme more Daddy!!” I mewl out. Zoro did not disappoint as he continues to pound into me.

“God you are so beautiful like this.” He murmurs as he pulls me into a kiss. We switch positions and now I am on top, riding him like crazy.

“F-Fuck..” Zoro grunts. I just giggle and continued to bounce on his cock. I then begin to stroke my cock and within minutes, I cum all over my hand and Zoro’s chest. Zoro cums soon afterwards.

“You are making it difficult to concentrate at times.” says Zoro as we get ourselves cleaned and then get dressed. I just laugh. “Oh my apologies Dr Roronoa.”

He takes my hand and leads me to the restaurant of the motel where the others were waiting.

As the story progresses, Zoro and Sanji are gonna fight over who is the actual main protagonist and narrator. Lord help us with this chaotic couple.

#sanji #one piece #zosan #Zoro #roronoa Zoro

[csaventing]

I hate that SA is seen as a White Cis Woman thing. As a Black mtf I feel like I can’t be honest and talk about my experience despite me being obviously queer since what feels like birth. I’ve had 2 different guys hurt me me like this while I was under the age of 18. The first of them always made sure I “finished” telling me it was my reward for keeping a secret so well. When he stopped with me I was in middle school. I guess him gaining full custody of his children changed him for the better? I hope so. Next one tried but failed to make me finish and I remember his frustration acting like I was the broken pervert for not getting off. I will never forget him for telling me after he was done that he wouldn’t have had to do that if I just got in bed with him the first time. Besides he wasn’t out to anyone as Bisexual so no one would believe me if I screamed what he did to me from the top of my lungs. He was my secret boyfriend. I was 15 and wasn’t ready to do that again. I guess he was. I feel so alone with these thoughts and whenever I talk about them people assume I am cis online. I am not. My experience as a feminine “male” child shaped who I am as an adult woman today. I was taken advantage of by people who knew I was different and knew no one would help. Who are you going to believe The white cop and the white Varsity lacrosse player or the fat black “dude” who wears hand-me-down skirts and draws with glitter pens and weekly faces homophobic and transphobic and racist slurs. It got better and it’s been almost 20 years since I left that province but it still stings to remember the pain and to be mis-identified online when I talk about my pain. Victims don’t always fall under”attractive cis women” and we deserve to not be fucking reduced to nothin I firmly believe I was a victim of a hate crime with the first guy bc of how he would bring up my race / race play shit while assaulting me. This form of violence is deeper than the general public or fucking Twitter wants to admit

.

#survivor #tw csa implied #tw csa #csa vent #trauma vent #actually traumatized #trauma #tw csa mention #tw csa vent

[bilesproblems]

The problem is that you're queerphobic asf and then call anyone who disagrees with you a TERF even if they are transfemme or just in general trans themselves.

You're queerphobic, actually.

A massive part of what queerphobia is, is not understanding someone's identity and choosing to be reactionary and fight someone over your assumptions on what that means rather than ask them why they feel that way. Which you are demonstrating right now by saying whatever word vomit this shit was rather than "can you please explain how being a bi lesbian works?" Queerphobia also heavily involves not being willing to understand someone and their identity. If you were willing to understand, you would, because there is no good reason to not support mspec lesbians that exists, and the only way a person could be unsupportive of bi lesbians is if they're ignorant and don't understand yet, or if they're going out of their way to be gold stars by excluding SAM-using lesbians. The lack of understanding you are demonstrating now simply by saying we're queerphobic for being queer in a way you do not yet understand.

You see the label of bi lesbian. You do not care to inquire. You do not seek to understand. You assume "mspec/bi always includes attraction to men" and forget your history that proves lesbian wasn't ever intended to be exclusive, and sappho of lesbos herself was fucking bi, and so you attack us and call us lesbophobic based on your assumptions when all we did was understand our history better than you and not misgender every nonbinary person who doesn't identify whatsoever as a woman.

Not to mention, you aren't allowed to call yourself queer if you think the rules of labels are strict. They're not. They're loose and they're meant to overlap. That's the point of being queer, to break the rules. You are queerphobic because you are going against the fundamental principles of queerness itself. You have no right to use th word of the weirdos if you shun us. You have no claim to the label for the rule breakers if you think lesbians can't be men or like men because that's "breaking the rules."

It is also horribly queerphobic to be bilesbophobic because bilesbophobia overlaps with many flavors of queerphobia; biphobia, transphobia and enbyphobia, specifically, as well as broader queerphobia (the hatred of and discrimination against identities that are queer. Even those who support SOME queer people can be queerphobic.)

The TERF/Transphobia claims come from several facts

1. The ONE and ONLY reason that the lesbian label currently tends to describe EXCLUSIVE attraction to women and elsegender people is because of TERFS. TERFS decided women who liked men couldn't be lesbians. TERFS decided men were evil. They also tried to get rid of you, dear transfem anon, and both nonbinary lesbians and butches, for being too close to manhood. They didn't succeed, but they did manage to push mspec lesbians and transmasc/trans man lesbians out, and make the label exclusive. These TERFS also tried to separate lesbians from the rest of the queer community. They failed, thankfully.

You are not being called a TERF, but you are being told you are using TERF rhetoric and falling for things TERFS say and TERFS created.

2. Being anti mspec lesbians is the same as hating non-binary people. Even if you are nonbinary yourself, you are hurting yourself and your community. I am a lesbian, exclusively. I have no attraction to men. I am attracted to women and I am attracted to elsegender people. My boyfriend is androgyne, in fact. That is lesbian, but it is bi. You must either say nonbinary people are not included in the lesbian label, making people like me just bi, or that all nonbinary people are women, making me just a lesbian, to not support mspec lesbians. There is no other way to go about it.

3. Multigender people fucking exist. An exclusive lesbian can be attracted to a man if that man is a woman. And if they date, the lesbian could call herself bi or even pan because she's capable of being attracted to all genders, but only if the gender of woman is present.

I am dead certain all your information on bi lesbians is not from bi lesbians. Perhaps you were told it's for lesbians who like trans women. It's not. Or maybe it's because you think we don't accept trans men as real men? We do, we just also accept that sometimes trans men can feel disconnected from cis men and still feel connected to the lesbian label because of their AGAB. It doesn't mean trans men can't be straight. It just means we won't decide for them what label they want to use, if they wanna say that they're straight because they're men who like women or lesbian because historically, transmascs and trans men were accepted in the lesbian community and people who's experiences keep them connected to their AGAB, even if they don't identify with it, will have a different relationship with their labels.

Pipe down. You don't know what you're talking about. I only dignified you with a response to show off my writing abilities to my followers. I don't think you will even read this. I do not care. If you've seen how foolish and queerphobic you were, I'll forgive you, but until then, stay quiet and don't try to tell people things about their identity when you don't understand it and we do. You're arguing with a strawman that you made up and won't listen.

There is nothing queerphobic about acknowledging that you historically belonged in a label. There is nothing queerphobic about using 2 labels because you feel you are in between the two. There is nothing queerphobic about using the split attraction model. There is nothing queerphobic about not misgendering nonbinary people while still not excluding them from the lesbian label. There is nothing queerphobic about breaking rules. There is, however something deeply and inherently queerphobic about not accepting someone's identity simply because it doesn't make sense to you right off the bat. It's not wrong to want to understand before you just accept it, because at least you are open to understanding it, but to call someone queerphobic because you don't understand is exactly what homophobes do, it's exactly what transphobes do, and it's exactly what all queerphobes do.

[schizowitchic]

re: the last post i reblogged i am now going to rant about biphobia i have experienced and am experiencing! yay /s

(under a cut bc this got way too long)

so in secondary school i was in a friend group full of queer people, majority of whom were bisexual girls (at the time. a couple are now nonbinary / asexual) . and they were very big on the whole "bisexual culture is liking every woman and 2 men" thing, a lot of "ew men" jokes, and all in all general "liking women is better than liking men" "why am i dating a gross icky man i should be with a woman".

now i am more attracted to men than women, not by much, its typically fairly equal, but i definitely have a leaning towards men. and i repressed that for AGES. because it simply was "frowned upon", so to speak, from almost everyone i was close with

(for further context for the rest of this. i am not out as genderfluid. i use she/her pronouns irl and ppl know me as a cis woman. i am not really out as aromantic, when i identified as aroace i did tell a few people but i think they either completely ignored me or forgot. lol.)

nowadays, i tell my friends i am bisexual. one in particular always seems to forget, constantly calling me gay/lesbian, assuming i have no opinion or that my opinion will be "ew no" when she asks if i find a man she likes hot. (she has told me so many times "why am i asking you this you don't even like men". i have told her i am bisexual several times) (she also thinks it's funny to call me & another friend "f-slurs" . she says that not the actual word but still. i have to find it funny bc she gets so defensive if we imply she's homophobic)

(i do call myself gay bc i consider none of my attraction ever to be straight. i have no major issues with being called a lesbian apart from the fact that. yknow. im not a lesbian and have never identified as such)

i made a post a while back saying something like "help im being biseuxal erasured". because i am!! i am stuck in yet another situation with people who are either mainly attracted to women/only attracted to women/don't often talk about their attraction to me & also two cishet girls who are attracted to men in a very different way than i am (one of whom erases the fact i am attracted to men and the other who i don't like and probably assumes i'm a lesbian bc of how often everyone else says that)

also full of "ew men" jokes!!. might i add.

i literally have no space to talk about the way i experience attraction, i have to water it down and pretend i only like women, pretend i am interested in romance, pretend i feel attraction when the occasioanll bout of extreme sex-repulsion hits, take (albeit censored) homophobic slurs, sex jokes about me & another female friend that are getting uncomfortable.

and pretend like the main perpretatror of this isn't being at all queerphobic. (she also has massive racism and antisemitism issues. although my friend did throw basically a whole book at her face when she made a really bad joke). to the point where i no longer consider her a friend but i can't say that bc then im overreacting and i'll get the same bullying ostracisation treatment & my friends are still gonna hang out w her so i can't avoid it

people wonder why i am aplatonic when throughout friendships i have experienced: making fun of me to my face & behind my back, bullying, homophobia, biphobia, aphobia, ableism .

like what the fuck. im sick and fucking tired of having nowhere safe to express my sexuality bc let's be real, the internet often isn't the best space.

ive made my peace with either having to compromise my aromanticism or my allosexuality irl (ie either be out as bisexual or out as aroace) but apparently i can't even freely be bisexual without people making assumptions and at this point im just waiting it out until i can hit restart and try make new friends

#biphobia #homophobia #long post #aphobia #queerphobia #bisexual #im aware some of my wording may be misinterpreted . im struggling to explain this #as you may be able to tell from the longwindedness #having friends is exhausting and stressful #aplatonic #aromantic #personal #rant #nyxie be quiet challenge

[stevenbasic]

GITJ Post 257: First Date, p3

Manifest: I am the dominant. I am the alpha.

“I’m going to the ladies’ room,” she said, suddenly standing. The waitress had come back with her credit card and boxes for the desserts, she’d signed the bill. “Box those desserts up and be here when I get back,” she told him, “we’re going to go have some fun.”

She blew him a kiss; she knew she needed a mirror. 

Manifest: I am irresistible to him. I radiate beauty. I am compelling. I am captivating. I am too attractive and tempting to be resisted. Anything I want falls at my feet.

Yes, Missy.

I am irresistible to him. I radiate beauty and self-confidence. I am compelling. I am captivating. I am too attractive and tempting to be resisted. Anything I want falls at my feet.

Yessss…

I am irresistible to him. I radiate beauty and self-confidence and power. I am compelling. I am captivating. I am too attractive and tempting to be resisted. Anything I want falls at my feet.

Goddamnit fuck YEssSssss…

She had finished her affirmations, staring deeply into her own eyes over the restaurant’s restroom sink, and had settled herself once again.

I need to relax..! she laughed to herself, knowing how she could get. This is fun, you’re having fun.

And you don’t want to molest the poor man before you get to the car haha.

Expectantly, he was waiting for her, just like she asked, at the table when she returned. He looked up at her like a little boy waiting for his mother. 

Nngh!

The young girls at the next table had been chatting with him, it appeared. He seemed nervous, they seemed intrigued, though they’d all went quiet when she appeared. She grabbed him by the hand. “Let’s go, honey,” she giggled, pulling him maybe a little roughly to his feet, “you know how you get when we stay out too late..!” Caught up in her exuberance, he laughed too, albeit more nervously. 

She pulled him outside, past diners waiting to be seated, amid his thanks for paying for dinner. There hung a little more mist in the air than earlier, and above the lights along the pier the sky was dark dark dark. If you tried carefully, you could smell thunder on the horizon, electricity in the air. Energy was building in the ether. Unable to help herself, free on her feet, Melissa dropped his hand and ran out ahead, spinning, arms out, so happy - a dramatic moment, watched by both he and others around. Women standing nearly seven feet tall in their heels tend to do that, draw stares.

He was laughing, blushing for her, and when she looked back at him she was beaming.

“Oh good you have the desserts!” she extolled, and he nodded, held up the paper takeaway bag for her approval. “Haha good thing you remembered!!,” she lauded, ”I am such a ditz! I’d forget my own butt if it wasn’t so big!” At that, she turned from him, and with a dramatic sway to her prodigious behind, began to strut away, away from the restaurant and all the wide eyes. A woman with two children swatted her husband for his staring. 

“Uhh…” Dr. J managed, eyes drawn like a magnet to her swinging hips. Bong bong bong it was like the liberty bell! He was rap-

“Haha made you look!” she crowed and then delighted in how, looking over her shoulder, she saw his face flush even more as she swung her butt. She knew how big, how big big big it looked in her tight, tight blue jeans and the poor boy made a show of looking shocked. HAHA he was so fun!

Some other guy whistled, making her laugh anew. 

“C’mon, hold my hand!” she laughed, waiting for him to catch up with outstretched arm. He tried to keep up but she was trying to beat the oncoming rain and her legs were so long! They walked along the pier - “hurry, hurry!” - past shops and other restaurants and other strollers who would sometimes turn and watch the two…he was so short, and she was so tall. Normally the stares would have bothered him, but it was like he was caught in a spell. Her? She was used to it; they always stared.

“Sorry for my hips!” she apologized, the third time she’d bumped him. Neither he nor she were used to their width, how much room they took up, walking together - but they were finding their rhythm, as a couple. She had put her hand, or the four fingers that she could fit, in his back pocket - and pinched his butt once! “Also sorry for all the talking about me so much at dinner,” she further apologized, in a moment of frankness, “thank you for being so patient with me…”

“Oh, no worries,” he said, “You're an employee, your health is important to me...”

”So I'm important to you...as an employee?” she asked, looking down at him with a wry little smile as they walked

”n-no that’s not what I meant. You’re…m-more than an employee”

“I guess that's good enough for now,” she giggled, “c’mon, the parking lot’s right down here…” They were nearly to the car, and she couldn’t wait to show him just how much more than an employee she could be.

They spotted her beemer, a white 2-series coupe. She’d parked in a quiet lot, quite a ways away from other cars, or the set of overhead lights that now lit up the droplets in the air. They jogged the last little stretch, her pulling him along. He couldn’t help but gape at the seismic motion of her chest right about at his eyeline. They hadn’t spoke about what they’d be doing from here, any plans after dinner, but if he had any more chances just to gape at that he could die a happy man tonight.

At the car, after the >beepbeep< that signaled the doors had unlocked, he hurried a step ahead of her to open the driver’s side for the lady - such a gentleman, she marveled, but- 

She grabbed him by the shoulder, opened up the back door herself, and commanded: “No, backseat, now.”

The interior lights of the car beckoned. She pushed him in.

“H-h-hey..!” he laughed, even as she lowered her large rear into the car behind him, causing him to scoot across the bench seat towards the far corner. Nice leather, black. He’d tossed the takeaway bag of desserts on the floor along with a small gym bag she’d left on the back seat

She got in, and immediately her eyes were locked on his. She closed the door behind her and the interior lights faded off. She sidled in closer, turned fully towards him, and her smile grew and grew, her eyes flashing in the mid-dark as he backed away as much as he could.

He was shaking a bit, he could feel it. Were they going to make out? Right here? In the parking lot?

She looked at him, stared into his eyes, her own heart thumping so loudly she was sure he must be able to hear it. She watched his face quiver, biting her lower lip in anticipation, in excitement, seeing the effect she was having on him already: he was shivering.  “Are you chilly?” she asked…or am I doing this to you? The temperature outside had dropped with the weather, it was true. 

“A…l-little…” he stammered, watching as already she was stretching herself away, forward into the front seats, reaching to push the start button, so she could turn on the heat. She could feel his eyes roam her voluptuous backside as the console lights came to life, sense him admiring the curves of her hips and torso. Her top was too small on her big body, and bared her at her trim waist. She let him look for another few moments as she adjusted the controls until, satisfied, she began to sit back. A rock song from another era came on through the stereo speakers. 

“It’ll take a little while to heat up,” she said, pushing her hair over her ear and setting her eyes on his again. She inched in closer, and felt something electrify her as she appreciated just how much bigger she was than he, how much more of the backseat she was taking up. “But, here…let’s keep each other warm.” 

“o-okay,” he stammered, turning towards her a bit and reaching behind her, awkwardly trying to set up an embrace, pull her - what? Onto his lap? He felt like an blundering teenager, not knowing what to do. Was that the last time he’d been in a backseat with a girl, in fact?

She giggled. 

“Why don’t you sit on my lap..?” she proposed, already stopping him, sliding hands onto his waist, “there’s not a lot of room back here, and I think I’m too…”

Sitting dead center on the rear bench seat, she lifted him, turned herself to face forward, and placed him on her lap, facing her. 

“…tall.”

He was in her lap, their faces close. Her big, long legs stretched between the two front bucket seats, so long they nearly reached the console. She kicked off her heels and they fell, forgotten, below the steering column and aside the control pedals. He sat high atop her big thighs, his scrawny legs wrapped in a “V” around them as she held them together, one hand on either side of his outer legs. Her thighs made a big firm seat for his smaller body, and she felt - oh god, that is what it is, isn’t it?? - his erection, already swollen through his pant leg, down his right thigh. She struggled to keep from moaning aloud, both from the thought of it and the sensation of taking control of his little frame, feeling this much bigger than him. 

“There you go,” she managed, settling him nicely in her lap and trying not to bely her excitement, “That’s better than my big fat butt crushing you.”

Though that can come later, she thought, if that’s what you want haha. 

”y-youre definitely not fat,” he said, stammering out anything he could so’s not to appear as fucking flabbergasted as he now felt. She just p-picked me up like a doll, like I was nothing, he marveled, and put me on her lap. He, too, was now struck with the realization of just how much bigger she was than he. Even seated on her lap as he was, his eyes were not above hers. Her head was bigger than his, her shoulders broader, her hips far wider. And that’s to say nothing of her mighty chest, which between them seemed to dwarf everything else. 

She watched his eyes go up and down their bodies, knowing the comparisons he was making as she began gathering her mane of dark, thick hair up behind herself, making a quick, loose bun. She saw him admiring the muscles in arms, which with her efforts flexed through the taut white material of her long-sleeved top, and she fought back a proud smile.    

“Y-you go to the gym a lot, don’t you?” he asked, maybe still trying to keep up the charade of being concerned for her health, her weight. The admiration in his voice, though, was unmistakable. 

”I…I do,” she answered, as she finished up with her hair, “I discovered lifting during a tough time in my life, and I figured ‘strong on the outside, strong on the inside’.  I really grew to love lifting and the focus it gave me.” 

“m-maybe some of the weight you put on is, like, muscle?” he offered, admiring now how the cords in her neck pulsed, stood out strongly in the shadows. She was, among everything else, incredibly fit. 

”Maybe,” she agreed, “I do have to be careful not to bulk up too much. I put muscle on real easy.” She’d noticed already how interested he seemed, talking about her putting on size. At dinner, and now here. “Too many muscles for you?” she asked, flexing her arms now more demonstrably, biceps swelling, showing him now unquestionably just how fit she actually was. Without a doubt her arms were twice as thick as his. 

”n-no, I've always liked…sporty girls,” he replied, the awe in his voice all-too evident as he admired her in the semi-darkness of the car cabin. 

“‘Sporty’, huh?” she commented. She cocked her head and smiled, considering him and the little streaks of submissiveness she knew ran through him and lots of guys when she began to really express her superior physicality. It was funny, how quiet and docile she could make them. She knew his type. “I think you like them extra sporty, don’t you?”  she continued, and then - tan shoulders bare in her white, off-the-shoulder top - she flexed her traps, the twin mountains of muscle on either side of her long neck, which normally sloped down into her deltoids elegantly but now swelled upwards in an outrageous, undisguised display of strength that she knew that made her look huge. Beast mode, she growled inwardly, feeling her lip curl into a little snarl. hahaha..!

”oh…my god,” he peeped, obviously more than just impressed…he was shocked. Cowed. Even a little scared. Too startled to even gasp. Jesus she’s huge!!! he gaped, a new respect for her incredible body and plainly awesome strength that made him feel smaller still, like he was shrinking right then and there on her lap. 

She laughed, lightly. Again, she knew his type. She softened, allowed her shoulders to relax. He blinked, recovering, and she knew she shouldn’t do anything else in the moment to frighten him. The male ego was a funny thing, could be played with but only pushed so far before snapping in its own silly little ways.  She didn’t want that here, now. She wanted a boyfriend haha. 

“I tell you…I’m a freaking hormone monstress these days,” she began, knowing she’d have to explain at least a little. Still, though, the stiffening of his erection against her left outer thigh was near driving her mad. “They’re doing crazy things to me - the boobs, the butt and hips and thighs. And yeah, you’re right. Some of my new pounds are probably muscle.”

“o-obviously…” he stammered, still a bit in shock. 

Oh jesus I’m too much for him, she thought, half in lamentation but half in a realization that just fueled her ever-growing arousal. I’m too much for him, she said again, silently to herself, but this time smiling inwardly, feeling herself swelling. It was like a manifestation in itself, one she wanted, now, to sow. I’m too, too much for him. 

Her hands had left his legs, had rested on his hips, and now began to explore his lower back. She still held him, in place, sitting on her thighs. “I find it interesting how weight can be distributed…” she finally said, inflating herself now with a big, deep breath. Despite his obvious infatuation with her muscles, she knew he was a breast-man, and this should do the trick. “…do you?”

He couldn’t help himself. His gaze dropped, unabashedly, to her tits. Even in the darkness their massiveness was apparent, undeniable. Perfectly huge and high on her chest, swelled up now in a remarkable display of her womanly size. 

“oh god Melissa you’re incredible,” was all he could muster, bringing an almost shy smile to the woman in front of him. He knew she could feel his embarrassingly huge boner against her outer leg, and he didn’t care. It was like a tribute, at this point. She was irresistible to him, radiating beauty and self-confidence and power. She was compelling, captivating, too attractive and tempting to be resisted. He was ready to put anything she wanted at her feet. Strange that he thought that, to himself.

She bit her lower lip, and fought against a surging horde of raging emotions. Just the littlest compliment, from him, set fires in her that she’d never felt before. “Would you just do me a favor and tell me I look pretty?” she said, her voice now soft and vulnerable, “I’m sorry, I’m so full of hormones…I’m a girl. I need attention…” She swelled up her breasts even more, causing him to groan. She realized she wasn’t even giving the poor boy the chance to speak, haha, but asked again: ”Do you think I'm pretty, Dr. J?"

Though in their focused preoccupation on one another, neither heard the patter of it on the roof, or saw the droplets of it on the windshield, the rain had begun.

“y-you can call me by my first name, Melissa…” he said, pulling his eyes up to once again look her in the face. Her eyes glimmered green-gold in the gloaming, her lips glittered glossy. He was earnest, feeling walls he’d had up for so long crumbling. And though his emotions felt clumsy, stiff, like prisoners let out from shackles for the first time in years, he felt free, freer than he had in a long time, 

She spent more than a moment in thought. “Hmmm,” she began her reply, finally, with a dimpled smile both wry and honestly touched, “I think I’ll stick with “Dr J” for now…but, it was a simple question. Do you think I’m pretty?”

Simple question, and for sure a simple answer. "Yeah, of course," he said, considering this the understatement of the century. 

She appreciated his certitude, and felt her belly flutter. "Mmm okay…” she purred, now hearing another layer of arousal seasoning her voice. She regarded him again, and was fighting even harder the urge to just pull him into her. “Do you think I'm…sexy?" she asked, with a new mischief in her eye, her tongue quickly wetting her already glossy lips. 

"Uhhh…yeah. I g-guess," he said, hearing himself attempting to hide the obviousness of his intense attraction to her. What was he doing? Why not jus-

She pulled him in, a fraction, closer to her. "What part of me do you think is sexy?" she whispered, her breath washing over him.

His eyes fluttered. 

"I dunno..?" he replied, suddenly embarrassed, shrinking under the weight of his own fetishes, fixations. He couldn’t tell her, he couldn’t, about the attractions he had towards her. Would it change the way she saw him, if she knew? He felt he needed…he needed to change the subject.

"You should just tell me," she continued in a whisper, forehead coming to rest against his, looking deep into his eyes from scant inches away, "I'm gonna find out anyway..."

“Oh my god, Melissa…” he breathed, knowing it himself, but still too-

“Can we talk about what happened at the park?” she asked, her voice still a whisper, her tone gentle. 

Oh god oh jeez no, he moaned, to himself, remembering how last weekend at their impromptu picnic - despite the occasion, despite the fact that he’d been there to sign his divorce papers - he’d been caught with an embarrassing boner, and nearly came in his pants right in front of her. 

“Oh my god I’m so, so s-sorry,” he began, sputtering in apology and pulling back from her just a bit, “for Saturday, with the nice picnic you’d made, losing control like that. It’s so embarrassing. And insensitive. You must be sick of it. And…” Figuring now she must have heard, must know, remembering himself being jerked off by Vida - or was it Abby? - under the table at the party while drunkenly staring at Melissa, ”…I’m sorry for what happened under the table on Friday night.”

“Yeah what were you looking at?” she giggled, obviously a bit embarrassed herself but with a laugh laced with a silver tinkle of pride. Guys jerked off to her tits, she knew that. But rarely did they do it right in front of her with a plate of pasta between them haha. 

“right??” he lamented, “I’m so, SO sorry…I’m such a jerk, letting that happen. I don’t know what comes over me, sometimes…” It was true…

“Shhh, shh…its okay. It's okay,” she assured him, her voice unbelievably patient, unbelievably tolerant. “You were drunk then, I know. It does happen, all the time, guys paying a lot of attention to my body, making them act funny. But I don’t mind….when it’s you. So…it’s okay.”

”oh…god, Melissa…” The ignominy was crippling. 

“Oh my gosh you’re so cute when you’re blushing!” she giggled, one hand coming up to caress his cheek, feel its new warmth, brush fingers gently down his face. “But that’s not what I wanted to talk about.” She smiled mildly. “I wanted to talk about…our kiss.”

Oh. Oh okay. Oh yeah…

“y-y-yeah..?” he stammered, heart threatening to beat itself out of his chest, her perfume caressing his amygdala as tenderly as her hand did his cheek, “What about?”

“I…I liked it, a lot,” she spoke, fighting back the urge to grin a grin that would light up the car, the lot, the entire night with her happiness. Is this what falling in love feels like?  “Wanna do it again?” she asked.

Before he knew it her fingers were twined into his hair, and she had pulled him back to her. It was not just their foreheads that kissed but now their eager mouths, which had been breathlessly patient here, this whole pregnant night and long week, for so long. But now their breaths each came in twin gasps as the shock of pleasure struck them both. Was that lightning, outside? Or the fireworks like they’d seen before, at their last kiss, behind closed eyes?

Their lips slid together, into one another immediately and they were suddenly sharing the same breath. Tongues touched, teeth nipped. Both partners moaned and writhed, grabbed by a pleasure preprogrammed to make them exactly what they were now: helpless to do anything but enjoy one another. Unlike their last kiss, which was aborted nearly before it began by his spastic loss of control, this one held promise to last forever. They were alone, it was dark, they had all night. She drank deep of him, he of her, each desperate to slake a thirst they never realized they had.

After an indeterminate time, kissing kissing kissing and by some unspoken agreement, they each drew back to regard one another afresh through the intimate inches that separated one from the other. Each heart was beating wings inside a ribcage, his fluttering like a bird, hers mighty and threatening to break free and soar. 

“Something incredible is happening,” she breathed, looking him in the eyes, desperate to kiss him again. Something magical, something chemical. There was a connection - they both felt it! - between the two of them that went beyond two people falling for one another, two people hot for one another. It was like two heavens colliding, it was like electricity pouring from each of their bodies, into the other. They felt it, and it made them each gasp again as their lips locked once more. They felt it themselves through their skin, in their own bones…and it was felt elsewhere as well, miles away. 

…across the city, in their homes, out with their own lovers

                             “...holy shit it’s happening…”

“Oh, god, daddy…”

                    growls and hisses and purrrrrrrrs….

This pleasure was not just hers, she knew. She was sharing it, it was multiplied far beyond the backseat of her BMW 2-series, and though the immediate thought of it inflamed her further, this moment was hers, just hers and his. She was focused entirely on him, and dove into their kiss anew. Her tongue swam into his mouth, shoving his this way and that and making him quiver with her display of strength. He loved it, she could tell, how she took charge of him in this most intimate playing field, their shared mouths. She was having her way, her tongue in total command and he whimpered in the most delicious way. He was now outright trembling in her lap, and she broke their kiss again, to let him catch his breath. 

“Here, sweetie,” she cooed, sliding her hands down his thin arms to take his hands and bring them to her big tits. 

“oh god…” he moaned, as they both looked down, seeing how small they seemed resting tentatively on her huge breasts. He almost needed to pinch himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming; he’d fantasized about this moment so many times, being able to feel her, but his hands were now frozen. She felt warm, soft…huge, and his hands were exactly where they were meant to be. No way was he going to pinch himself, now. 

Her hands came back to rest easily on his thighs, her big palms and long fingers nearly wrapping around them. "Mmmm...you're a great kisser," she purred, sliding her hands up and down his legs, sending an electric jolt through his body even as he still sat speechless, staring at his hands resting in the big white swells of her voluptuous chest. She could feel his cock, so hard in his khakis, pressed into her own solid outer thigh. It was making her painfully horny, but she kept her left hand far enough away. She had been celibate for so long and - though the weight of that time now threatened to burst forth and overwhelm the poor man with its sheer power - she could wait a short while longer. 

"Oh….so are you...” he moaned, finally answering her, obviously enraptured, “…a-and, your body…my god..!"

Melissa laughed indulgently, her big breasts shaking his hands as they rested on them. She brought her hands up to cover his, as a sudden embarrassment made him start taking his hands away. "No, I love them there," she purred, holding his palms to her chest, "they feel so good."

"Oh, jesus, yesss…" he exclaimed, now giving her breasts a speculative squeeze through her shirt and bra, his hands nearly disappearing into her full chest. She laughed again.

"Are you going to want to watch me take my top off?" she asked, in her lowest, sexiest voice. She was discovering, now, exactly how to push his buttons, and loved how her breasts really turned him on. She reveled in making him so hot for her that he was going to burst, maybe right there against her leg. In her own way, it was her way of establishing dominance over him. She was so wet with the thought that now that her panties were practically flooded, and her scent filled the small cabin of the car.

"god, yes…" he said in a whisper, like he was afraid to speak up lest he lose the chance.

Though they’d been deaf to the patter of the rain, so far, they both heard the first rumble of thunder in the distance.

Her eyes saw something in his face that made her speak again. “Let’s go to your place,” she said…

=======================================

inspired both loosely and strongly by a scene in an old story by Pac

up to post 275 on my Patreon

#growing into the job