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yuta-nakamots · 4 years

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Beautiful Time - h.rj ; Part 3 of 6

Pairing - Vampire!Renjun x Reader

Genre - Fluff with a hint of angst

Warnings - Mentions of blood, description of feeding

Summary - Vampires are creatures forced to walk upon the earth for longer than humans could possibly imagine. One would think it gets boring after a while, but not to Renjun, the foreign exchange student who seems to know a little too much about the early twentieth century.

Word Count - 2.5k

A/N - this chapter is shorter than the rest of them because i was more concerned about moving the plot along but i promise the next few will be a lot more packed

Following the sudden end to your previously joyful Christmas party, a general agreement is made that Haechan will now live with Renjun and Jaemin for his own safety and that all three of them will not leave their apartment more than necessary to decrease the chances of getting tailed by the hunters. Again, Haechan stays in Jaemin’s room, though this time, a permanent addition, and you stay with Renjun. He had told you the party was going to be a sleepover so you had brought your own clothes, however, you opted to wear one of his shirts instead, taking in his calming scent.

As you settled into his bed while he sat at his desk, anxiously hunched over his computer, you heard the muffled sounds of a shooting game coming from Jaemin and Haechan’s room as your mind wandered to what would happen to you and Renjun now that the hunters were an issue, though you didn’t let it weigh on your mind for too long, wanting to hear an answer from Renjun himself. You called his name softly, receiving a light hum in response from him. “What do you plan on doing about the hunters? Are you planning on just avoiding them?”

Renjun leaned back in his seat, closing his laptop as he formulated an answer, “To be honest, I knew this would happen sooner or later so I already had a plan, it’s just a matter of putting it into action,” he glanced over at you before continuing, “I’m going to send Haechan and Jaemin over to my hometown in China where they can stay in a house that belongs to my family. I have connections there so I know they will be protected” he explained.

You rolled onto your side to face him, noticing the brighter red coloring of his eyes as you asked, “what about you? What about us, Renjun?”

Renjun replied to you while he changed his own clothes and got into bed next to you. “I plan on staying here for the remainder of the school year to make sure you’re safe,” he said, pulling the blanket up to cover both of you even if he didn’t need it, “though once you graduate, I’m not too sure how much longer I’ll be able to stay around given the severity of the hunters’ antics. I suppose I’ll go with you to wherever you choose to go and pursue your future plans if you do want to leave home.”

“I’m willing to go to China after graduation,” you proposed, feeling his arms wrap around your waist and pulling you closer towards him, “there’s bound to be a school I like over there and if it means you and the others will be safe, I’m more than happy to make the move.”

Renjun placed a soft kiss to your lips before speaking, “y/n, are you sure you want to do that? You’d be leaving your entire life behind”, he said, looking into your eyes, searching them for a definitive answer.

“If it’s for you, I’ll do anything as long as you’re by my side” you stated as Renjun began to butterfly kiss his way to your jaw.

He lightly groaned into your neck as one of his hands found yours, intertwining your fingers, “you’re such a good girl, y/n, I can’t believe you’re mine.” You looked down at him, your eyes meeting his.

“Renjun, are you hungry?”

“Not in the conventional way you would be, darling.”

“Feed from me, Renjun,” you practically pleaded, “mark me as yours.”

Renjun pulled back from you suddenly, rolling onto his back and looking up at the ceiling. “Y/n are you sure you want this? Are you sure you want my marks on you where people will know you’re in a relationship with one of us?”

You threw one of your legs over his, pulling him back towards you, allowing you to trace shapes along his chest and stomach. “I wouldn’t move to China with you if I wasn’t willing to let you feed from me” you said, placing your hand on his cheek turning his head to face you for a second, his eyes turning an even brighter shade of red before he gently grabbed your wrist and returned his gaze to the ceiling as he sighed.

After an hour of reassuring Renjun that yes, you were sure you wanted this, he finally gave in to your wishes and fed from you.

He bit into your wrist, not wanting to risk marking your neck as it would be harder to hide. He doesn’t take much, just enough to satisfy himself, in turn making you a little drowsy and feeling like you wanted to fall asleep right then and there, the comfort of his bed enveloping you. You barely even noticed when Renjun had gotten up and left his room, coming back with a glass of water and a small blue packet. “This is a vitamin pack to restore the nutrients you lost” he explained, his words falling on virtually deaf ears as you were on the brink of sleep, though you still force yourself to drink the water and eat the vitamins he gave you before drifting off into slumber.

You woke up to the sound of the boys arguing out in the living room, Jaemin’s whining being hard to miss along with Haechan’s voice filled with annoyance. “Let me get this straight, you’re sending us to a country where we don’t even know the language while you get to stay here with your girlfriend” Jaemin exclaimed while you slowly got out of bed and made your way to the living room.

You heard Renjun sigh, “You’ll be safe in China, and I’m staying back to protect her. She said she’s willing to move with us after she graduates so I won’t be alone here for long.”

Haechan started to speak but Renjun cut him off, “Haechan, you know the plan. I’ll be fine.” Their heads turned to you as you entered the room, sleep still evident on your features.

Haechan looked back at Renjun, blurting out what he was going to say a few seconds earlier, “but she’s still just a human, she’s vulnerable no matter if you’re here or not.”

“Which is why I’m staying back to protect her” Renjun said through gritted teeth.

“She’s gonna have to be turned sooner or later though” Jaemin mused, eyeing you to gauge your reaction as he moved to sit down on the sofa, pulling out his phone.

“Guys, I’m literally right here,” you grumbled, “you could at least ask for my opinion.”

Haechan rolled his eyes and scoffed, “okay then, princess, what would you like to do on this matter?” His voice laced his sarcasm.

You mimicked his haughty expression before responding, “I’m willing to be turned...after graduation though.”

“That still means you’re vulnerable until the end of the school year” Haechan pointed out.

“Which is why I’ll be with her” Renjun seethed out of annoyance, his hands flying towards Haechan’s throat.

Haechan backed up, his arms raised in defense as if this were a normal occurrence, “okay okay, alright. We’ll go but only if you promise that she’ll be turned once she moves to join us.

“Fine.” Renjun huffed, though Jaemin wasn’t satisfied with that, forcing him and Haechan to shake on it, to ensure both parties would uphold their respective end of the bargain.

The second half of the school year goes by quickly, Renjun barely showing up to school, only coming to the class you had together all the while having just a single run-in with another hunter, though he told you he was able to take care of it easily. You had started looking up colleges in China within Jilin, the city Renjun said Haechan and Jaemin were now situated in. You found a few that interested you and applied to all of them, hoping that by some miracle you’d be accepted into at least one. You were so anxious about it that you asked Renjun to pull a few strings to get you into the one you liked most though he swore you could’ve gotten in on your own accord.

Given your good grades and other academic achievements, you were in the range of one of the best students in your class, however, you knew you wouldn’t be able to live out the college life you had dreamt for yourself, as this was only a facade so your parents would let you leave for China. Renjun went over the ‘plan’ with you and explained that once you arrived in China and settled down, you’d have to withdraw your enrollment due to the agreement he made with Haechan, where you would be turned once you moved in with them.

When you announced that you’d be studying abroad in China for your years in undergrad, it came as no shock to your friends and family. It was well known that you had an interest in different languages and cultures, so they all congratulated you on your decision and bravery to study in a country you’ve never lived in before. But what they didn’t know was that you wouldn’t be coming back, or at least, not in their lifetime.

Graduation came quicker than expected, you having gotten sucked into the storm that was final projects and exams, but nevertheless, you managed to survive. Renjun didn’t come to your graduation ceremony or your grad party for obvious reasons, the biggest one being the fact that he doesn’t show up in any pictures or videos, which you would be taking a lot of on those days. But being one of your classmates, you did manage to find his name among the list in the program being handed out, his name as just another one of your many other classmates who were graduating alongside you, causing you to smile as you thought about taking this next leap of faith with him.

After all the ceremonies and parties had come and gone, you filled your time by often going over to Renjun’s apartment, neither of you worrying about projects and tests anymore, nor did you have to worry about Jaemin and, especially, Haechan, interrupting the two of you. You allowed Renjun to feed from you every so often, definitely more often than before, the act becoming a sort of bonding activity for the both of you. You found that Renjun enjoyed it most when he had you in his lap, your arms around his shoulders as your hands tangled in his hair.

But aside from getting to spend more quality time with him, you were also finally able to call Jaemin and Haechan, not previously being able to due to your schedule. You were overjoyed when you heard Jaemin cooing at you through the screen of Renjun’s laptop, “y/nnnn I miss you so so sooo very much, you miss me too, right?” Jaemin, making kissy faces at you as Haechan dry-heaved from somewhere else in the room along with Renjun gagging next to you.

You didn’t even mind when Haechan called you princess and told you to hurry over because dealing with Jaemin alone was quite a headache. You and Renjun stayed in a call with them for over three hours, only realizing how much time had passed when you let out a yawn, letting Renjun know you were starting to get tired. You both said your goodbyes to the other pair, Renjun flinching in disgust while ending the call as Jaemin rambled on about how he can’t wait to have you, his baby, back with him again.

You and Renjun did your nightly routines in silence, not feeling the need to talk to each other when you had just spent such a long time in conversation with some of the most high energy people either of you have ever met. As you were lying in bed, your body half over Renjun’s the reality of this whole situation finally hitting you that in just a few months your life was about to be drastically different from what it is right now. You’d have cut ties with your family, moved to a country that you barely even knew, and maybe even have become a vampire.

Renjun caught on to your tense state, your moments of overthinking becoming more and more common as the days passed by. “What are you thinking about, love?” He asked, rubbing your back as if to ease the pain you were feeling in your mind and soul. You unloaded your thoughts on him about your worries of the plan not going accordingly but also, more importantly, the anxiety you felt from having to leave behind your family and friends, the people who raised you, the people who stayed by your side through the many struggles you experienced.

You started tearing up as you spoke, your voice getting caught in your throat. Renjun pulled your head in his chest, his hands moving to caress your sides, running up and down them soothingly. “If it helps, think about it as if you are recreating yourself. You can make yourself into an entirely new person” he began, “when I first met Haechan, he said something like that. It had taken me a while to adjust to this new lifestyle because I didn’t like change but yet I didn’t like how it felt as if life was just going on without me while I’m forever stuck in the same state.”

You lifted your head to look up at him, only to have him gently press your head back down into his shoulder, allowing himself to run his hands through your hair, his fingers playing with the longer strands of it. “I feel like this is more of Haechan’s story to tell so I won’t say too much about it, but he had completely remade himself as he transitioned. His birth name is Donghyuck, but he told me not to call him that, to call him Haechan instead. He told me he was finding a way to live as himself while not getting stuck in the past as some of our kind does.” You let yourself relax into Renjun’s hold, enjoying the silkiness of his voice as it almost lulls you to sleep, though your brain suddenly starts up again at what he says next.

“Y/n, how about you take my last name,” he proposed, “not as in marriage per se, but as a way to help you separate your new self from your old self. Huang Y/n sounds quite nice.” You felt your cheeks heating up, causing you to bury yourself further into the shirt he was wearing, causing him to let out a laugh. “What? Do you not like that idea? Is it too soon?”

“Too soon, Renjun, too soon,” you acknowledge, “ask me again in a hundred years and I might say yes.”

“Might? Only ‘might’?” He questions, teasingly pulling your body against his and allowing himself to place playful kisses up your neck and jaw.

Willing your worries to go away, you melted into Renjun’s embrace and found yourself floating off into sleep as his kisses slowed and he started humming a song the two of you had embarrassingly danced to earlier that morning.

A/N - this chapter is shorter than the rest of them because i was more concerned about moving the plot along but i promise the next few will be a lot more packed

@nct-writers

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liskantope · 4 years

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Some brief (and sometimes not-so-brief) reactions to major Disney films 1937-1967

Around a month ago I made a temporary switch from Netflix to Disney+ with the goal of watching all major Disney movies in order, roughly paced so that one year of Disney film-making equals one day of real life. I should clarify here that by “major Disney movies” I mean mostly just all the animated ones plus a few hybrid live-action/animated ones, and a few of the most popular live-action ones (at least the ones I remember having a song considered good enough to feature on one of the Disney Sing-Along videos, a staple of my video-watching as a kid growing up in the 90′s). I would have been interested to see Song of the South, which I’ve never seen in its entirety, but it’s not included on Disney+ for fairly obvious reasons. As I get further into modern Disney, I’ll probably skip over most of the sequels and other features I strongly expect not to like (with the exception of Belle’s Magical World, which is said to be so legendarily bad that I just have to see what the fuss is about).

This time range of three decades happens to include more or less exactly those Disney productions that Walt Disney himself took a major role in (he died shortly before the final version of Jungle Book was finished). I’d like to do this again in another month, when I will have gotten up through the late 90′s, but honestly this post wound up way longer than I was imagining and took several more hours than I expected (or could really afford), so I’m not promising myself or anyone else that.

Looking at Wikipedia’s list of Disney productions, I’m a little taken aback at what a low percentage of these are animated features, which to me form the backbone of that company’s legacy; visually scanning the list makes the line of animated films look shorter than I had always imagined, but really what this is showing is that Disney produced far more live-action movies than I ever knew about, including (and perhaps especially!) in its early days. Right now I’m continuing on through the 70′s films, but this set of mini-reviews represents the first month of watching and three decades of Disney magic.

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, 1937

This is the full-length feature that began them all and which had the burden of defying contemporary skepticism that a full-length animated feature could be taken seriously at all. We are already far beyond the earliest days of animation and have progressed lightyears beyond the quality of “Steamboat Willie”; throughout the film I marveled at the sophistication of the animation with a newfound appreciation of how groundbreaking a lot of the sequences must have been.

I know I watched this at least a couple of times in childhood and I think once when I was a bit older, but even that was long ago.

Snow White is based on one of the simpler classic fairy tales, and the writers had to come up with ways to flesh out this very short story enough to occupy well over an hour. This was done not by exploring the character of Snow White or the Queen or even filling in extra plot details (the fate of the hunter is never addressed) but by spending a lot of time on the dwarfs. The detail spent on individuating them took a lot of work from the animators, but I think their efforts paid off. I can’t say the same about the attention paid to Snow White or the Queen (pretty much the only remaining characters). Snow White has an almost entirely flat personality, with no sense of curiosity or concern whatsoever about the Queen’s designs to have her killed, just having literally only one goal in mind: to marry this Prince who she’d only seen for about two minutes and run away from out of shyness. (This is of course a trend we’ll see with Disney princesses for a long time.) The Queen similarly only has the goal of being “the fairest in the land”. Something about the particular harshness of her voice strikes me as The Quintessential 1930′s Female Villain Voice (“I’ll crush their bones!”), whatever that means -- maybe I got my idea of what this should be from the movie Snow White in the first place.

I still think “Heigh Ho” (which I’ve known well since early childhood) is an excellent song in its utter simplicity, especially when complimented with the “Dig Dig Dig” song (which I did not remember at all until a few years ago when a Tumblr mutual posted the excerpt containing it!). I’m not enormously fond of “One Day My Prince Will Come”, although I did enjoy playing it on the violin at a couple of gigs with one of my musician friends back during grad school -- I was convinced then, and up until watching Snow White just now, that it belonged to Cinderella.

Pinocchio, 1940

This was a favorite movie of mine in earlier childhood; we owned the VHS and I watched it a lot. As a child, I had no sense of one Disney movie coming from a much earlier time than another one; it was only much more recently in life that I understood that Pinocchio really comes from all the way back eight decades ago. Pinocchio taught me the meaning of “conscience” (both in the dictionary sense and in a deeper sense), and it shaped my notion of what fairies may look like -- for instance, my mental picture of the Tooth Fairy, back when I believed in her, was inspired by the Blue Fairy in Pinocchio.

It’s amazing just how much the quality of Disney animated features improved from the first one to this one, the second. It helps that both the story and the characters are far more complex than those of Snow White. The plot from the original book (which I’ve read in Italian and English) was more complex still, of course. There is one gaping hole where it’s never explained how Gepetto somehow found himself in the belly of a whale (I don’t remember whether or how this is explained in the book), but I’ll forgive that.

It’s interesting to see the 1940′s caricature of “bad (early teenage?) boy” shown in the animation and voice of Lampwick. Phantom Strider talks about the turning-into-donkeys scene as a notoriously dark scene for adults who didn’t find it as terrifying when they were children -- count me in as one of those adults! It’s especially terrifying to see the whole mass of boys-turned-donkeys being treated as slaves in the hellhole known as Pleasure Island and realizing that this is never going to be resolved in the movie -- it’s rather unusual in Disney stories for some great evil to be left unresolved with no recompense even for the chief villain. In fact, Pinocchio is pretty much the only Disney story I can think of where the worst villain doesn’t meet some kind of dire fate. Really, the range of Pinocchio’s view is much narrower: it’s just the coming-of-age story of one puppet in his quest for Real Boyhood. (And yes, I still giggle at how intricutely Jordan Peterson analyzes particular scenes from the movie to support his beliefs about neo-Marxism or whatever.)

Disney+ heads many of the descriptions of the older movies with “This program is presented as originally created. It may contain outdated cultural depictions.” I’m a little surprised they don’t do this with Pinocchio, given what appears to me a rather derogatory depiction of Gypsies.

“When You Wish Upon a Star” has become a timeless hit, for good reason. And I still find “Hi Diddle Dee Dee” extremely catchy.

Fantasia, 1940

I saw this one multiple times growing up (for earlier viewings, I was not allowed to see the final number “Night on Bald Mountain”). My mom, for her part, saw this in theaters at the age of around 4 (even though it originally came out long before she was born) and thought for years afterwards that there was no such film in real life and her memory of seeing it had been just a pleasant dream.

I have nothing much more to say about this one except that, representing a very different approach from most animated films, Disney or otherwise, 1940′s or otherwise, it succeeded exquisitely. The “Sorcerer’s Apprentice” number was particularly perfection; it was as though the composer originally had every motion of the story in mind when writing the music. At the same time, having the main character appear in the form of Mickey Mouse in some way seems to cheapen the effect.

The Reluctant Dragon, 1941

I watched this for the first time, not having known it existed. There isn’t really much to say. All that stuck in my mind was one of the shorts, “Baby Weem” (amusing in a disturbing way), and the longer segment which gives the movie its title (also amusing, in a different kind of disturbing way). It was especially interesting to see a 1940′s cartoon portrayal of a very effeminate man, or should I say, male dragon.

Dumbo, 1941

I saw this maybe two or three times growing up, and not in very early childhood. It was never one of my favorites. Later on, I learned that it was done very low-budget to make up for major financial losses in the Disney franchise. This definitely shows in the animation. However, if there’s one thing I can say in praise of Dumbo, it’s that it’s incredibly daring in its simplicity, not only to have such elegantly simple animation but in having a mute title character (instead the main “talker” in the film is the title character’s best friend, who had much more of a New York accent than I’d remembered).

In some ways I find this film incredibly cold and dark by Disney standards, for reasons I can’t entirely explain, and I remember feeling this way even on earlier watchings when I was much younger. The stark cruelty of the humans running the circus, as well as the elephants other than Dumbo and his mother, just really gets to me. (I vividly mis-remembered one of the lines I found most memorable in childhood as “From now on, Dumbo is no longer one of us.” The actual line is, “From now on, [Dumbo] is no longer an elephant”, which in a way, is even more chilling.) In this regard, there was no need to make a modern, woker remake of Dumbo containing an explicit anti-animal-exploitation message -- the 1941 version conveys this message loud and clear. Now that I’m writing this, I suppose it could be argued that this is another instance of what I described under “Pinocchio” of leaving a major evil unresolved in a Disney film. And apart from that, while the ending for Dumbo is meant to be a very happy one, as an adult I find it incredibly naive: Dumbo is now super internationally famous for his extraordinary gift and is entering the life of a child celebrity, and it’s just going to be smooth sailing from now on? I hate to say it, Dumbo, but your troubles are only just beginning. (I was glad to see Dumbo reunited with his mother in the last scene, however, which I hadn’t remembered happening at all.)

“Look Out For Mr. Stork” is a skillfully-written song I’d completely forgotten about for two decades or so but remember knowing well when I was young. I still think “When I See an Elephant Fly” is a fantastic song, especially with all its reprises at the end -- I’d had some bits of it confused in my memory but had kept the main chorus with me over all the years. Now it’s widely decried as racist, or at least the characters who sing it are decried as racist caricatures. For whatever my opinion is worth, I’m inclined to disagree with this, in particular on the grounds that the crows seem to be the most intelligent, witty, and self-possessed characters in the movie. I’m also pretty sure I heard critical things about it over the years which are false. For one thing, not all of the crows are played by white actors -- only the lead crow is, while the rest of the voices are members of a black musical group called the Hall Johnson Choir. Also, I’m not clear that the lead crow was actually named Jim Crow by the time the movie came out (no name is given in the movie itself). Now an earlier, much more forgettable song featuring black men singing about how they like to work all day and they throw their pay away... yeah that seems awfully racist.

Bambi, 1942

I have surprisingly little to say about this one -- it’s just very distinct from other Disney films of the time, in its story’s lack of magical elements, its characters all being animals and animated in to realistically model animals’ movements, its lack of musical numbers, and its plot reaching the same level of simplicity as that of Snow White. Not to mention actually having a benevolent character die, which I don’t think had been done up to that point. I remember watching this a couple of times as a kid; I was never terribly eager to watch it again and I feel the same way now, despite having majestic beauty that I can really appreciate.

The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad, 1949

This is the first of Disney’s animated features that I never had seen before. What a strange movie, or should I say, two smaller, unrelated movies rolled into one. I liked Mr. Toad’s half better than Ichabod’s half, or at least I found it more entertaining. I was brought up with the book The Wind in the Willows and recall seeing a non-Disney animated rendition of it (which was better and somewhat more thorough than this half-movie-length rendition). I was kind of excited when the “The Merrily Song” started because it unlocked a song from my early-childhood memory that I’d forgotten about for more than twenty years but knew from one of the Disney Sing-Along videos. I still think it’s a not half bad song, especially with the harmony.

The Ichabod story was not at all what I expected, not being familiar with the original book version (I had always assumed that Ichabod must be the name of a villain). I found it completely boring until the final horror sequence. As a child I would have found the courtship part even more boring (at least now I can muse on how man-woman courtship dynamics were shown in the late 40′s), and I would have found the horror part at the end very scary (in fact, maybe this is the reason my parents never showed the movie to me). It is a little shocking in being the only Disney story I’ve seen so far with a decidedly unhappy ending.

Cinderella, 1950

This one I only ever saw once or twice as a child. This is not counting a very vivid memory I have from around age 6 or 7 when I was watching a part of it over at another family’s house and their child, who was almost my age and nonverbal autistic, rewound and repeated the same 2-minute sequence involving the mice for probably about an hour (I was impressed because I at the time didn’t know how to work the controls of a video player).

I suppose this could be considered the second in the main trifecta of the most conservative fairy tale princess stories that Disney did in the earlier part of its history. I think one can argue that Cinderella has the strongest and most fleshed-out character out of those three princesses. I like the spirited internal strength she reveals in her very first scene. That said, like the other earlier princesses, she seems to have one singular goal in life, and that is to find her true love, not, say, to escape her abusive stepmother and stepsisters.

My reaction to this movie is overall positive. The mice were fun (I also like how their voices seemed a lot more like how mice “should” talk than in most other Disney cartoons); the dynamic between Cinderella and her evil relatives, and the dynamic between the stepmother and stepsisters themselves, was shown in a rounded way; and the fairy godmother is a great character despite having only one scene. The character of the king is pretty odd (very selfish yet his main dream is of getting to play with his future grandchildren) while not especially memorable or well fleshed out. There are certainly some great classic songs in this one -- not the most stellar that Disney has ever produced, but solid.

Alice in Wonderland, 1951

I was curious about what I would think of this one, since we owned the video of this at my home growing up and I watched it many times during childhood but as I got older I fell in love with the original Lewis Carroll books which, together, I often consider my favorite work of written fiction ever. I had not seen the Disney film Alice in Wonderland for around two decades, although I made the mistake of catching parts of more modern, live-action adaptations of the story more recently. I wondered what I would make of the old animated Disney adaptation after getting to know the books so well.

There is simply no way that any movie can recreate the true flavor of the books, but Disney’s Alice in Wonderland does a fine job of creating the general nonsensical, sometimes bewildering dream atmosphere, and, perhaps more importantly, capturing the essence of Alice’s personality. I give a lot of credit to Katherine Beaumont for this -- she has the major girl’s role in the next movie on this list as well, but she especially shines as Alice. Two other very distinctive voices, Ed Wynn as the Mad Hatter and Sterling Holloway as the Cheshire Cat, also add a lot to the cast of characters.

While mixing around some of the scenes of the original book Alice in Wonderland, with some scenes of Alice Through the Looking Glass inserted, the progression of the plot is a long, dreamlike sequence of strange situations with only a few common threads, true to the original first book (Looking Glass had a little, but only a little, more structure). In the movie, everything breaks down at the end with many of the previous scenes and characters swirling together and Alice frantically trying to wake herself up. One could object that this is not how the dream ends in the book Alice in Wonderland, but there is a similar sort of breakdown at the end of the dream in Looking Glass and it feels very real somehow, as in my experience this is sometimes how vivid dreams disintegrate.

Oh, and did you know that Alice in Wonderland has a greater number of songs in it than any other Disney film? There are nearly 25 that made it into the film, even if lasting just for seconds, with a around 10 more written for the film that didn’t make it.

So, does the Disney film do a good job of conveying one of my favorite books of all time, within the confines of being a children’s animated film? I would say yes. For reasons I described above, and from the fact that it manages to avoid working in a moral lesson for Alice, or depicting Alice as a young adult, or manufacturing an affair between Alice and the Hatter (ugh), like some film adaptations, I would say that this classic Disney version is the best Alice in Wonderland adaptation that I know of.

Peter Pan, 1953

Although I never knew this one super well, this movie has a special place in my heart from the way the flying sequence enchanted me in early childhood. I have to differ with the YouTuber Phantom Strider when he dismisses the 40′s/50′s-style song “You Can Fly” as just not doing it for him, because that song along with the animation of the characters’ journey to Neverland had a major hand in shaping my early-childhood sense of magic and wonder and yearning. I distinctly remembering a time, around age 6, when I just didn’t see much point in watching other Disney movies, or movies at all, which didn’t have flying in them, because what could possibly top the sheer joy and freedom of feeling able to swim through the air? I’ve had hardly any exposure to Superman, and so the kind of bodily flight I imagined in fantasy or performed in dreams was almost entirely shaped by Peter Pan. (At the same time, the crocodile in Peter Pan influenced my nightmares at the same age.)

I only ever saw this one a few times, but I distinctly remember the most recent of them being when I was a teenager, perhaps even an older teenager, and I remember thinking at the time that it was a pretty darn solid Disney movie. I still think the same now, while granting that some aspects of the movie seem a little antiquated and certain sequences with the Native Americans are quite cringe-worthy from the point of view of modern sensibilities. Only a couple years ago, when visiting my parents’ house, I finally took down the book Peter Pan from the shelf and decided to give it a read and found it a beautiful although slightly strange and offbeat story. In particular, I was shocked at how nasty and vengeful Tinker Bell was (particularly in trying to get Wendy killed), when I had remembered her as sweet and naive in the movie. It turns out I was wrong about the movie -- Tinker Bell tries to get Wendy killed there also! -- but somehow the tone is moderated well enough that in this version I never really feel horrified at her behavior, nor do I feel disturbed at the situation of the Lost Boys in the way the book made me view them. The song of the lone pirate who sings about how a pirate’s life is short, right before Captain Hook fires his gun and we hear a dropping sound followed by a splash, is one of the more masterful executions of dark humor that I’ve seen in Disney animation for children.

While most of the songs in Peter Pan, considered as songs on their own, are pretty good, I think the best one is the one whose lyrics didn’t make it into the film: “Never Smile at a Crocodile”.

Lady and the Tramp, 1955

Despite being more obscure than most of the old Disney animated classics, I used to know this one quite well since we had it in our home. I’ve always considered The Great Mouse Detective as the most underrated Disney film of all time, but I think it has serious competition here. Lady and the Tramp is an absolute gem. While not quite as Disney-fantasy-ish with its lack of magic and other fairy tale elements, in my opinion Lady and the Tramp is, in most ways, superior to everything else on this list save Mary Poppins. Beautiful animation which shows Lady and most of the other animals moving realistically in a way we haven’t seen since Bambi*. Everything visually and conceptually framed from the dogs’ points of view. Great voice acting. Consistently solid dialog without a single line too much or missing. A story evoking the dynamic between humans and pets, class inequality, and deep questions about the place of each of us in society and choices between a stable existence among loved ones and striking out to seize life by the horns. Our first female lead who stands on her own two four feet and whose sole goal isn’t to get kissed by her true love (one could argue that Alice was the earlier exception, but she is a little girl whereas Lady is actually a romantic female lead). When Lady is approached by her two best (male) friends in a very awkward (perhaps especially from a modern sensibility) but sweet scene where they offer to be her partner, Lady makes it clear that she doesn’t want or need a husband just for the sake of having a husband to make babies with -- her standing up for her own wants in this way doesn’t in the least turn into a Moral Stand that dominates the movie. Excellent music all the way through.

Oh, and this movie was my very first introduction, in early childhood, to the Italian language (”Bella Notte”), which some 25 years later sort became my second language of sorts.

Criticisms? Well, the baby was animated rather stiffly and unnaturally, but that was like half a minute of the movie at most. And there’s the whole segment with the Siamese cats, which produced a great song purely music-wise (fun fact: Peggy Lee provided the voices of the cats) but nowadays comes across as rather racist. I’m not entirely sure how I feel about it, but I will say that I’m sure in the minds of the creators this was no different than having animals of all other nationalities (Scottish, Russian, Mexican) appearing in the film with voices reflecting the respective accents.

*There may be a few exceptions, like Peggy, who seems to be modeled after the musician Peggy Lee and moves like a sexy human woman. The way that human sex appeal is conveyed through the animals’ movements in this movie is quite impressive: my mom confesses to having somewhat of a crush on Tramp growing up and not quite understanding how that could be possible when, well, he’s a dog.

20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, 1954, and Old Yeller, 1957

I don’t want to say about these movies, as they don’t really fall under the category of animated classics. I just want to say that, while I saw each of them once growing up, on seeing them again I recognize each as a great movie in its own adult point of view way that is not necessarily very Disney-ish.

Sleeping Beauty, 1959

I think this was the movie I was watching at the time I decided it would be fun to write a bunch of mini-reviews for Tumblr, as my reactions were changing a lot as I was watching. I went into the movie very curious, because while I only remembered enough of the fairy tale story to know that it was another of the very simple ones, and I remembered the one song as a waltz by Tchaikovsky, and I knew I had seen the movie once (and probably only once) as a kid, I couldn’t remember anywhere near enough to possibly fill a full movie time. What was actually going to happen in this hour-and-a-quarter long film?

I wasn’t watching long before I came up with the description “spectacularly forgettable”, in part to justify why I’d managed to forget practically all of my one previous viewing. The story doesn’t have much substance and feels sillier than even the other fairy tale Disney plots, like even minor twinges of critical thought, even granting the magical rules of the universe, are liable to make the plot topple. There is some filler to flesh out the movie, but (unlike with Snow White’s dwarfs) none of it is as amusing as the creators seemed to think it was. The only characters with actual personality are rather boring -- the capers between the members of royalty and the jester are a bit on the annoying side in my opinion. Maleficent seems to have no motive whatsoever. She actually calls herself something like “the mistress of evil” later in the movie. This is pretty black-and-white even by Disney standards, where the bad guys usually at least want to think that they’re on the right side of things or justified in their aggressive behavior. Aurora (the title character) has the least personality of all the Disney princesses. Literally all I can say to describe her is that she has the Disney Princess Trifecta of characteristics: she has a good singing voice; she is friends with all the “nice” animals; and her only goal in life is to be reunited with her True Love who she met once for all of a few minutes. The reason why I couldn’t remember any songs other than the Tchaikovsky one is that there aren’t any.

The one thing I consciously really enjoyed while watching was the fact that the score throughout was Tchaikovsky; the idea of having one work of classical music as the entire score seems like a bold one for a Disney film. As I was digesting the movie afterwards (and watching the short documentaries supplied on Disney+ helped here!), I came to realize that this classical music backdrop was complimented in quite an interesting way by a fairly unique animation style. I had been disappointed by the animation early in my watching, disliking how a lot of the figures in the beginning castle scene (for instance, various people’s faces), looked very “flat” somehow. But I’ve come to see this as part of a style where everything looks almost like a series of cut-outs superimposed on each other, to incredibly beautiful effect in a lot of the outdoor scenes.

My conclusion? If you watch this the same way you watch most Disney animated movies -- focusing on plot, characterization, action, and meaning of the main story -- it will just be kind of forgettable at best. But if you watch it as more of a purely visual and musical piece of art without trying to make much “sense” out of it (so, more like I would watch a ballet), you may find it uniquely beautiful among Disney classics.

One Hundred and One Dalmations, 1961

Whew -- what a complete and utter contrast from its predecessor! I can hardly imagine a film that’s still distinctively Disney while being more different from Sleeping Beauty in every aspect.

I remember seeing One Hundred and One Dalmatians a handful of times in childhood (when I was around 5 and it had just come out on home video, my mom almost bought it for me but decided to go with Beauty and the Beast instead explaining that it had better music -- I grew up knowing the preview for Dalmatians that showed at the beginning of our Beauty and the Beast VHS than the dalmatians film itself). I remembered a number of scenes very distinctly, including a lot of the Horace and Jasper bickering and Cruella smashing one of their bottles of beer into the fire and knew Lucky’s line after getting stuck behind in the snow almost word for word, while I had entirely forgotten all of the country/farm characters and entire sequences involving them. I had forgotten, but soon remembered, the television scenes including the Kanine Krunchies jingle. (Some years later, I think as an older teenager, I read the original book with some interest.)

Although I wasn’t around in 1961, everything about this movie’s style strikes me as very contemporary -- the animation in particular seems like the current style for 60′s cartoons. Something about the dialog and humor feels that way as well, as though it closely represents a sort of 60′s young-people-in-London culture that I’ve never seen myself (I was struck for instance by Cruella being asked how she’s doing and cheerfully answering, “Miserable dahling as usual, perfectly wretched!”). It was a little strange and offputting to see television so prominently featured in Disney animation from so long ago, and to see such a decrepit bachelor pad (with the accompanying lifestyle and attitudes) as Horace and Jasper’s in a children’s movie. The crazy driving in snow at the end startled my adult sensibilities (as I now have some memorable experiences driving in snow) in a way that didn’t affect me as a child -- scenes like that just didn’t feel like Disney after having just watched all the previous films. All in all, these novel features made the whole movie a wild ride.

I’m bemused by the fact that, despite taking place in London (which I hadn’t remembered -- I thought it took place in America), the only accents which are fully British are those of the villains Cruella de Vil, Horace, and Jasper.

Main criticisms: I found all the stuff with Rolly being characterized by his body shape and only ever thinking about food to be in poor taste (although not surprising for the times). And while “Cruella de Vil” is a great jazz number, the movie has no other music to speak of -- my mom was quite right to choose Beauty and the Beast over it.

(I realized when finishing this review that this is the only one of all the movies in the list that I’d actually enjoy seeing again sometime soon. Not sure what to make of that. Something about it is more interesting than most of the others? Especially the human-centric parts?)

The Sword in the Stone, 1963

I never saw this movie until later childhood or maybe even early teenagerhood, when I quite liked it. On watching it again, I was overall pretty disappointed. This movie has some decent songs and some fun aspects to the story, but a lot of it is kind of weak and forgettable and it’s all just sloppily done.

The story has a clear moral message which is generally pro-education and about reaching one’s full potential, but in my eyes it comes out kind of muddled because the story shows Wart ending up as a legendary king only out of the arbitrary happenstance that that happens to be his divine destiny. Merlin’s motives seem kind of inconsistent as well, with him sometimes seeming to support Wart in his desire to become a squire, then flying off in a rage when Wart chooses squirehood over fulfilling a “greater” destiny, then joyfully returning after Wart pulls the sword from the stone and is now set on the fixed path to being king, even though this involved exactly zero change of attitude on Wart’s part. The message that actually comes across looks more like, “We have to just follow whatever fate has in store for us” than “We must strive to be the best we can be”. And, it arguably even comes across as subtly disrespectful to more mundane lifestyles and career paths.

The animation is not great by the high standard of full-length Disney features (I noted how I especially disliked how tears were shown). Wart’s voice seems to change a lot, sometimes broken and sometimes not yet broken. I found out after watching that this is because the character was played by three different actors, sometimes with more than one of those actors in the same scene! This was purportedly because the voice of the first actor cast for the role started to change, but then why does Wart sometimes sound like his voice has already changed anyway? Sloppiness all around.

Still, some parts of The Sword in the Stone are fun even if none of it is stellar, and it entertained me more when I was younger, so worth watching once, especially if you’re a kid, I guess?

Mary Poppins, 1964

I came into this one far more familiar with it than with most of the other Disney movies, including the ones I watched many times when I was young, so it feels a little strange to try to summarize a similar-length review of it. Mary Poppins is in my book without a doubt one of the top three Disney movies of all time, in some respects the very best, and certainly the masterpiece of Walt Disney himself, the culmination of literally decades of determination on his part to turn Pamela Travers’ children’s works into a movie. (I would feel sorrier for Travers about how strongly Disney twisted her arm to turn her books into a movie whose style was entirely antithetical to hers, if it weren’t for the fact that the Disney version of the story is just way better than her rather weak set of stories. I give Travers ample credit for having created an amazing character in the person of Mary Poppins, but for coming up with good stories, not so much.)

I didn’t see the full movie Mary Poppins until later childhood (although I knew many of the songs) and it quickly became a favorite of mine. I went a gap of a number of years without seeing it before I copied the soundtrack from someone when I was in college, which spurred me to go out and rent it (back when Blockbuster was a thing) and so I managed to reconnect with it at the age of 20. More recently I’ve become somewhat of a Mary Poppins enthusiast -- feeling pretty alone among my generation in this regard, with the possible exception of the theater subculture -- having seen probably most or all of the documentaries there are on its production and learned a ridiculous amount of trivia about it, not to mention knowing the whole soundtrack pretty much in my head.

Mary Poppins seems to be Disney’s longest children’s classic, at 2 hours and 19 minutes. All it lacks, really, is an animal-themed or classic fairy tale atmosphere and a proper villain. But what can you get out this movie? Stellar child acting (especially for that period) and excellent performances all around, apart from some awkward but endearing aspects of Dick Van Dyke’s acting (while his singing and physicality is superb). A complex and multi-layered story combining magic, comedy and a little tragedy, appreciable in equal measure from a child’s level and from an adult’s level. Revolutionary special effects which include the first extended hybrid live-action and animation sequence. Timeless words and phrases which have permanently entered the lexicon. One of my favorite extended musical sequence of all time in any movie (”Step In Time” takes up 8 minutes and change, and I’m glad they didn’t go with the “common sense” measure of cutting this “unnecessarily long” number). The Sherman brothers at their very best, in a musical soundtrack that easily scores in my top two out of all Disney movies (the other one being The Lion King). A beautiful message (among several big messages) about the little things being important (or at least, that’s a very crude summary), exquisitely encapsulated in the most beautiful song of the movie, “Feed the Birds” (this apparently became Walt Disney’s favorite song ever, and I’m pretty close to feeling the same way -- I’m determined that one day when I finally have a piano I’m going to learn to sing it along with the piano). I could go on and on here.

If I try really hard I can come up with the sole nitpick of feeling that maybe the parrot head on the umbrella’s handle shouldn’t only reveal itself as a talking parrot head in only one scene right at the very end -- this should have been shown at least once earlier. Even granting that, this film is still practically perfect in every way.

The Jungle Book, 1967

(Let’s get the Colonel Hath in the room out of the way first: “The Jungle Book” is a terrible title for a movie. You know, when you base a movie on a book you don’t have to give it the same title as the book...)

I saw The Jungle Book several times as a kid and, despite not considering it nearly as good as Mary Poppins, similarly reconnected with it in adulthood (particularly the soundtrack). Only several years ago I found myself thinking of getting hold of a double album of classic Disney songs that I thought I’d heard about but couldn’t seem to find online. It soon occurred to me that mostly what I really wanted was some of the songs of The Jungle Book, so I got that movie’s soundtrack instead. I soon learned for the first time that The Jungle Book’s songs were written by the Sherman Brothers*, precipitating an “Ah, that explains why I remember them as so good!” moment. (“I Wanna Be Like You” seems like the clear winner among the songs.) Of course hearing the soundtrack made me curious about the movie, which I did eventually get hold of several years ago; thus I had seen this film exactly once already since childhood.

It says a lot about the music and the overall technique behind this film that I still look back on it as one of the great classics, considering how weak the story is. In particular, I consider a story arc to be pretty flawed when characters that seem significant and/or memorable come in without really living up to their expected big role: the wolves who raised Mowgli play a crucial role in the beginning before more or less disappearing (and it doesn’t entirely make sense to me why Bagheera, rather than they, is guiding him to the man village), and King Louie (who is a well-formed character that I particularly enjoy watching) really ought to come back into the story later somehow (an alternate, and much more complex, ending had him make a reappearance). The villain Shere Khan is not especially well developed in terms of his character and motives, but I do enjoy his menacingly bass voice. Still, the voice acting, the action, the animation, and the overall setting are all very solid here.

I’ll end with some random observations about the song “That’s What Friends Are For”. I think the likeness of the vultures to the Beatles was mostly lost on me as a kid (along with the recognition that this movie came out in the Beatles’ heyday). More interestingly, even when I was old enough to understand how vultures eat, the fact that every single line of the song is a clever macabre double-entendre went completely over my head. I do think it was a very obvious mistake, by the Obvious Standards of Cinematography, to give Shere Khan the last line of the song and begin that line with the “camera” on him, rather than have his voice come in “off-camera” and Mowgli and the vultures looking thunderstruck before panning to him, but maybe I shouldn’t be pushing for overdone techniques here.

* An exception is “Bare Necessities”, which was written by Terry Gilkyson, the original songwriter Disney received submissions from, who wrote two hauntingly beautiful other numbers which were deemed not Disney-ish enough to be put in the film.

Some general stray observations:

These older Disney films love gags involving alcoholism and drunkenness, a bit of a questionable emphasis given that the audience is children. This trend continues into the 80′s at least, but I don’t think one sees it much in modern Disney movies.

Watching these animated films I often find myself flinching as characters’ heads smash into things or gigantic objects smash over their heads, feeling almost surprised when they come out of it pretty much fine. I guess this a staple element of cartoon action throughout the decades, but I can’t recall a more recent Disney animated film where we see this (guess I’ll soon find out!)

There is a certain style of vocal music, with unified rhythm and lyrics but complex harmony and a capella, which seems to have been immensely popular in the 40′s and 50′s and distinctively appears in practically every single one of the 40′s and 50′s films above (“You Can Fly” is a typical example). I recognize it also from some non-Disney-related old records my parents have that were passed down to them. I’m curious about whether this style has a name.

For years I thought the Sherman Brothers did only the soundtrack for Mary Poppins and Bedknobs and Broomsticks, only discovering they did The Jungle Book songs rather recently as I explained above. It turns out they were involved in most of the major Disney films around that period, including The Sword in the Stone and The Aristocats (although not its best-known number “Everybody Wants to Be a Cat”).

There is a particularly sad instrumental passage, played by the string section starting with a minor-key violin melody going downward and joined by lower string instruments, which I knew well from my Jungle Book soundtrack (partway through “Poor Bear”) but was surprised to hear in desperately sad moments of several of the other movies around that time (including One Hundred and One Dalmatians and Robin Hood, or at least a close variant of this passage with slightly different endings). I have no idea who wrote this or how it came to be reused so many times.

I knew the name Bruce Reitherman as the voice of Mowgli in The Jungle Book, but in watching all of these other features back to back I’ve noticed that there are some other Reithermans in the front credits of quite a few of them.

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douchebagbrainwaves · 3 years

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AT THE TIME THERE MIGHT HAVE BEEN OK IF HE WAS GOOD, SO IN THAT RESPECT THEY'RE BETTER POSITIONED TO PROSPER IN A RECESSION THAN BIG COMPANIES

A new concept of variables. The main reason there are only a few rich people buy original art, and even now I find it kind of weird. If you look at the historical evidence, it seems an axiom that this would be an optimization, not part of any specific science; it's literally meta-physics in our sense. Xenophon Mem. 0 have in common? One reason to launch early, to understand what it is. With one exception: patent trolls. Java in the press about what Jessica has achieved. Notes The ramen in ramen profitable refers to instant ramen, which is like a compiled program you've lost the source of your problems in a way that makes them so. Angels who've made money in technology are preferable, for two reasons: they understand your situation, and they are nowhere near as smart.

You don't need to know principle is that in practice socialist countries have nontrivial disparities of wealth, and are aghast at the thought of our investors used to keep me up at night. The world is—and you specifically are—one quantum of making users' lives better. 12, and just build things. It's as if mathematicians, physicists, and was shocked to discover, not something customers need. Ironically, the main thing I'd be feeling was curiosity about which of two proofs was better. 1 x 2 or x if foo 1 2 7. No one would know what side to be on any shortlist of admirable people. When people say Web 2. It's just unbearably inefficient. The real test is revenue. When you're eight it's called playing instead of hanging out, but that there be few of them.

Hackers are not stupid, and unanimity is very rare in this world, I think, 24 hours to say yes, and the company is a good deal for the board to give him. Stone, Lawrence, Family and Fortune: Studies in Aristocratic Finance in the Sixteenth and Seventeenth Centuries, Oxford University Press, 2005. And unless you already have most of what you built for the previous ones, then you're competing with publishing's form of distribution, and that's why they do it. 16% false positives means that it is not clear whether you can keep hope and worry balanced, they will be facing not just technical problems but their own wishful thinking. 01 and. It's much like being a postdoc: you have to draw a building, because your users will do it. Software companies are sometimes accused of meandering. The traditions and financial models of the old Moore's Law back, by writing a stripped-down kernel how hard can it be? Sparse Binary Polynomial Hash Message Filtering and The CRM114 Discriminator.

That the speakers at YC were so consistent in their advice. When things are hard to understand because the ideas are out there, separated from us by what will later seem ridiculous, I want to examine its internal structure. Founders at Work. The atmosphere of the average big company—that hackers can implement software, but there is more in his books than in a library of art monographs. I doubt they realize it, that readers trust bloggers more than Business Week. Their craziness is the craziness of the idle everywhere. They don't want founders to turn down most acquisition offers. We had to pay out their earnings in dividends, and so on.

But they could be profitable. There's no consensus yet in the very word taste sounds slightly ridiculous to American ears. It's not as painful as raising money from multiple investors, as most VCs say, they're more likely to be smarter. I see a man must either resolve to put out nothing new or become a slave, in which case problem solved, or at least, certain kinds of arrogance, investors vary greatly in this respect was the original author of GMail, which is even shorter than the Perl form. For example, explicit support for programs with multiple users, or negotiate with other companies, and that territory seems to be about the 7 secrets of success. England, the Industrial Revolution. It also gives them more control. But should you start a startup: success or failure of a startup that succeeds, it's going to stop to consider the ability to get things done. It took decades for relativity to be accepted, and the VCs will own a third of the company? Another way to fly low is to give them sufficient activation energy to start using whatever you make, you have to make something people want.

The High-Res Society December 2008 For nearly all of us, because our software was so complex. What matters is not ideas, but their strategic value. Compared to IBM they were like Robin Hood. If you factor out the bootstrapped companies that were actually funded by their founders through savings or a day job as a waiter to learn how to hack also means that when you have 57 things going on at once, they wouldn't have presented them the way they do for standardized tests? Dynamic typing. For some reason, the more qualifiers there are before the name of your VC stops mattering once you have bad programmers, the group of people we need to introduce now is valuation. I think this is generally a formality; if you say anything mistaken, fix it immediately, and so on. To kids, wealth is a fixed pie. If so, could they actually get things done, and designed languages all too influenced by the technology of the day so adults can get things done.

This is probably the single best thing they can do it I'm going to demonstrate this phenomenon by describing some. But increasingly the founders of Yahoo and Google. This is especially necessary with links whose titles are rallying cries, because otherwise they become implicit vote up if you believe as I do actually typing. Now suppose you're so un-rapacious founder is only going to become a good hacker, between about 23 and 38, and who wants to distract voters from bad times at home, for example. This is largely a tautology but worth remembering all the same valuation: that would be the president. He seemed to be running out of money. The resulting technological growth translates not only into wealth but into military power. But that constrains you in different ways. And that's what programs are: ideas. But that's something you can do is jump in immediately. Want to know if the selection process will outperform other successful applicants. They also need to keep your expenses low; but above all, it could either be a bug or a new category of things not to eat—the Bay Area than Miami is simply that it's populated by adults, but that I often spent money I desperately needed on stuff that I didn't want as the top idea in their mind at any given moment he may need to be here a certain amount of stuff, it starts to appear.

Notes No one seems to have been nerds in high school, my friend Robert Morris and Trevor Blackwell were in grad school, a friend of mine rarely does anything the first time, with misgivings. It will be a flop and you're wasting your time, you'll be well on your way. In addition to the technical obstacles all startups face, and the VCs will try to draw you out, but thinks hacker means someone who breaks into computers. How could they go ahead with the deal? Another from that batch was Loopt, which is not an acceptable solution, whereas 99. But not in the random way that three year olds. So what to make, is extraordinarily powerful.

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danishprince · 5 years

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redid this 92 questions meme from 4 years ago for Fun and Profit because i like seeing how much i’ve changed over the years. not tagging anyone, but if you want to answer the questions, go wild

what was your…

last beverage? woter

last phone call? a confidential call to a research lab at my university because they’re studying alcohol use in young adults and wanted to know if i fit the criteria to be in the study (i do, so i get money for it fuck yeah)

last text message? i told my dad that our neighbors got two of their trees cut down and his response was “Wwwow”

last song listened to? currently listening to “evening prayer aka justice” by ezra furman!

last time you cried? maybe like saturday or sunday? not really sure

have you ever…

dated someone twice? nah

been cheated on? don’t believe so

kissed someone and regretted it? eh i’ve had a few kisses that i look back and kinda cringe at because we were really drunk or i was Not Into Them or whatever, but actually, truly regret? no.

lost someone special? it’s been awhile since anyone close to me died. my maternal grandma (and step-grandpa) are getting pretty old/less healthy though so i’m like starting to already feel weird snatches of anticipatory grief for that which :/

been depressed? i’d say so yeah, on occasion

been drunk and vomited? fun story i briefly thought i was allergic to alcohol freshman year because i’d throw up every time i drank. TURNS OUT however i just was a dumbass who didn’t know how to hold their liquor

list three favourite colors: hot pink, teal, black

in the last year, have you…

made a new friend? yes indeed

fallen out of love? cannot say that i have

laughed so hard there were tears? oh constantly. though i do that regularly because of the dumbest shit, so that’s not, like, an anomaly

met someone who changed you? YES the professor of my psych lab whom i ADORE

found out who your true friends are? yeah, or at least i feel way more comfortable and grounded in my friendships than i did. which is cool!

found out someone was talking about you? i overheard my coworker at our (drama-filled, my god) orientation leader job bitching about some other coworkers, but then what she said about me was “yeah katie’s pretty cool” so i was like :) :) neat

kissed anyone on your facebook “friend list”? hell yeah babey

general questions.

how many of your facebook friends do you know in person? the vast majority. there’s a few Spelling Bee Kids who’ve just added me for Spelling Bee Clout that i don’t know irl, but otherwise i don’t really add people i don’t know

how many siblings do you have? 1 (one) 16-year-old bröther

do you have any pets? 1 (one) very old round guinea pig named hamlet

do you want to change your name? eh not really. i’m not, like, obsessed with it, but it’s a decent name and i have no urge to change it

what did you do for your last birthday? i turned 21, but it was a monday, so i went to a restaurant with three of my friends and ordered 1 (one) Alcoholic Beverage. then later that week i went to a coffee bar that serves alcohol later at night with some of my other friends and had more Alcoholic Beverages there

when did you wake up today? 9:30ish

what were you doing at midnight last night? being asleep lmao

something you cannot wait for: going to arizona and later going back to kentucky for senior year of college (holy fuck)

when did you last see your mother? like 15 minutes ago, she’s doing laundry or something

what is one thing you wish you could change about your life? where 2 begin. uhh i wish i was more naturally outgoing instead of having to consciously turn on my Extrovert Persona in certain scenarios and end up getting super drained from it. i also wish i knew what the fuck i was doing with my life but i think that’s just, like, The Eternal Twenty-Something Mood (at least i hope it is dear god)

what are you listening to right now? the song “rodeo” by lil nas x, which PERSONALLY said gay rights

have you ever talked to a person named tom? yes multiple, and every tom(my) i have hated (sorry if you’re a tom and you’re a decent human bean)

what’s getting on your nerves right now? i have to do a bunch of important life and school stuff but i am procrastinating it! so i guess...my brain

most visited webpages: twitter, tumblr, discord, instagram, the dear prudence advice column on slate dot com lmfao

blood type: o+ i believe, but i am too smol to donate blood so i do not know for sure :(

nicknames: some of my friends refer to me over text as k8e and i love it tbh. also katie itself is a nickname

relationship status: single but like, kind of a thot

zodiac sign: virgo sun cancer moon cancer rising

pronoun: they/them but she/her is also fine

primary school: private lutheran school

middle school: the same private lutheran school

high school: public school

college: university of kentucky for undergrad and also a concurrent grad program (long story). maybe more grad school???? somewhere else??? or not???? I Don’t Know

hair colour: honey blonde

long or short: hair? just got it cut short in january and it was the best decision i ever made

height: 5’6"

do you have a crush on someone? define “crush”

what do you like about yourself? i’m a good listener and writer and also sometimes my Funney Joaks land

do you have any tattoos? nah. i am afear’d i’d regret it

are you right- or left-handed? right-handed

first surgery: some ear procedure thing in kindergarten. if that doesn’t count i got half my wisdom teeth out the summer before college and the other half the summer after freshman year (but was technically awake for both)

first piercing: ear piercings when i turned sixteen

first best friend: uhhhhh my friend stephanie from home-preschool? or this girl named grace who was my kindergarten best friend but then moved away

first sport you joined: i believe dance classes when i was but a little peanut

first vacation: idk? we went to san diego when i was two i think? don’t remember it though

first pair of trainers/sneakers: good question. had some boss-ass light-up shoes once

right now i am…

eating: popped corn

drinking: woter

about to: hopefully write this [bernie sanders voice] damn email, but who is to say : - )

listening to: my liked songs on spotify (currently “i think i’m going to kill myself” by elton john)

interested in having children? if that’s how the proverbial cookie proverbially crumbles, yeah. that idea seems really far away even though i know high school classmates with kids.

interested in getting married? yes, but if and only if i meet the right person

ready for a career or have one? [sobbing]

which is better…?

lips or eyes? eyes generally, but lips are also Good

hugs or kisses? k i s s e s. i lov to kiss. love hugs too though if it’s with friends

shorter or taller? actually being a similar height to me is optimal!

older or younger? mmm i tend to subconsciously lean older, but younger is fine too

romantic or spontaneous? the wording seems to imply that “romantic” and “spontaneous” are opposites which just isn’t true. both??

nice stomach or nice arms? arms i guess?

sensitive or loud? my first impulse was “loud” but like....loud in that i tend to gravitate to people who are more extroverted than me, but not in terms of being overtly annoying or demanding.

hook-up or relationship? :^) judging by my History(tm) it’d be committed hook-up, lol. but like either is good. am not about sex with a stranger though.

troublemaker or hesitant? troublemaker ~vibes~ but not actually, like, a danger in any way. being hesitant can be cute, but i myself am often pretty hesitant so it can become an Awkwardness Standoff more often than not

have you ever…

kissed a stranger? no, but came damn close in greece

drunk hard liquor? oh yeah lmao

lost glasses or contacts? i’m sure i’ve lost a pair of contacts somewhere in there

had sex on the first date? depends on your definition of “sex”, and also on your definition of “date” really, but also Yeah

broken someone’s heart? i hope not, but i think maybe :/

had your own heart broken? ....ish?

been arrested? nope

turned someone down? yyyyyyep

cried when someone died? not in my memory? though i might have

fallen for a friend? :^) haha oh yeah

do you believe in…

yourself? i try oh my god do i try

miracles? i think

love at first sight? nah. i think intrigue at first sight is a thing, or lust at first sight, or even just a bizarre extraterrestrial sense of Knowing, but real genuine love? nahhhh son you gotta know someone deeply for that. mortifying ordeal of being known and all that

heaven? mm yeah i’d say so

santa claus? no, and i haven’t for a hot minute there

kissing on the first date? lol yeah kiss away

angels? fuck yeah sometimes they’re circle things with 56879879677 eyes and they’re cool af

well in review i have indeed changed quite a bit from myself four years ago! in summary i am more of a thot and also drink alcohol. idk. my answers then ~seemed~ more sure of myself in terms of, like, this façade of being chill all the time, but less sure re: how i related to other people. all my angst on those questions was about school instead of general personhood. 4 years ago i also definitely /remember/ being insecure (at the time) about the fact that i’d never kissed anyone/etc., but my answers themselves don’t look that way. (sidenote being insecure about that kind of thing really isn’t worth it, everyone does life at their own pace.) whereas now i feel more open actively discussing my insecurities (see above re: future plans/etc.) instead of just boxing them down and pretending they don’t exist. as a high schooler i thought i was bad at being a person, and i feel like i’m a lot better at being authentic with myself (and ergo, being a person) now. though of course there is no right way to be a person which is something i still frequently have to remind myself.

ANYWAY yeah that was a fun waste of an hour feel free to use these questions for yrself

#tag meme #personal #92 questions #about me

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jamfingers · 6 years

Text

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY - your tipsy internet neighbor

if you had a twin i would still choose you

AO3 Link || FFN Link

@thenameismaynard bc this is your fault @kingcobrakai1972 bc you asked me to @shadowcatgirl09 bc I just love you, hey girl @respectable-alcoholic bc you also asked to be tagged in trash fics

To the whole Bonkamily, I love you all, you’re beautiful people. Enjoy your Valentine’s Day fluff, it’s also under the cut if you don’t feel like leaving Tumblr.

Bonkai. Fluff. AH AU. Humor. Mildest angst bc I apparently can’t help myself. Motivated by a conversation gone terribly awry that I had with @thenameismaynard on Tumblr (keenan24 on ffn, I believe). Anyway, the prompt we hijacked was “Person A shuffles nervously around at a party. Person B startles them with a ‘Hello, glad you could make it. I’ll be your designated extrovert for the evening if you could please follow me.’”

I’m not going to tell you the song the title came from - if you don’t know, I’m disappointed in you. Also Funyuns vs Hot Fries/Cheetos is an actual ongoing debate between myself and my SO. I’m team Cheetos and he’s team Funyucks. No beta, all mistakes are mine and I wrote this while fairly tipsy, so there’s probs quite a few.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

“Okay, so…” Kai pauses, considering his words. “Right, so Funyuns. It all starts over a bag of Funyuns.”

“Funyuns?” a disbelieving voice queries.

“That’s what I said,” Kai answers. “Anyway, you know how I teach little kids piano for this after school program? Well, one day, I was just desperately craving Funyuns, so I go mug the vending machine.”

.o.0.0.o.

Kai groans, irritated at the stupid snack machine that ate his money again. With a sigh, the tall man looks up and down the hallway before proceeding to kick in the fucktarded money-stealing vendor. It’s an older model, not one of those futuristic ones that locks up tighter than a nun, so eventually the force of his kicks causes his bag of Funyuns and a honey bun to fall into the receptacle. The hungry grad student takes both treats and makes his way back to the music room.

He’s an adult volunteer at Whitmore’s elementary school every Tuesday and Wednesday. It was something he started doing two years ago as an undergrad because it looked good on a resume, but then kept up with because fuck him, he actually liked the way little faces lit up when they realized what their grubby little hands could do. It was cute.

Also, Whitmore elementary had it’s very own teacher bae and no lie, Kai was trying to hit.

Tucking the honey bun in his jacket pocket and opening his Funyuns, Kai takes the long way back to the music room. It was break time for the kiddies, they were all munching on healthy snacks before pick-up, which Kai always used as an opportunity to grab his own junk food. And to pass by Miss Bennett’s classroom.

Bonnie Bennett a.k.a. Kai’s personal hot teacher fantasy and reason number one Kai still volunteered at Augustine-Whitmore Elementary School. She taught third grade science and she had a smile like the sun and hips like a hula dancer and just seeing her made Kai’s day better. She was one of the science tutors for students who needed extra help before testing days, so she had her own room full of brats when he passed by her brightly decorated doorway.

Most of the kids are chatting and eating their apples and crackers, so Bonnie’s attention gets pulled to him when he pauses at her door and boom. There it is. The sun.

Kai grins back and waves her over and Bonnie casts a look around her classroom before coming to greet him. She wrinkles her nose at his chips.

“Funyuns, Kai?” she asks in disbelief. “The vending machine has hot Cheetos with lime and you went for Funyuns?”

“If I wanted to eat sawdust,” Kai replies. “I’d be a carpenter.”

Bonnie scoffs at his snappy comeback and Kai’s smile grows before he very deliberately fishes a big ring out of his bag and bites into it, crunching with a relish. Teacher bae’s face grows disgusted and she looks over her shoulder at her kids before looking back to him.

“Aren’t you supposed to be with Caroline and Nora in the music room, onion breath?”

“They can handle twenty kids on their own,” he states. He leans back on the doorframe. “Speaking of our mutual friend, Caroline, are you going to her party on Friday? It’s off campus, and I know you don’t have a ton of homework to grade on Fridays.”

Bonnie shuffles nervously. “I’m not really a party person. And it’s a college party -”

“A grad student party,” Kai corrects. “And you live with Caroline. You’d be pretty much the same age as everyone else in attendance Bonnie, it’s not like you’d be the odd one out. ‘Sides,” he crunches on the dregs of his chips. “I though Care-bear was one of your besties.”

The science teacher purses her lips at him. “She is. That’s not the point. I’m just...not big on parties.”

The volunteer tutor hides his disappointment by tipping the Funyun bag into his open mouth to catch crumbs. Bonnie sighs in disgust and Kai ends up smirking at her as he bundles up the empty bag and puts it in the trash.

“Tell you what, Ms. Hot-sawdust-with-lime,” his heart races when Bonnie shoves him half-heartedly. “If you decide to come out of your shell, I’ll be your party-buddy okay?”

He starts to walk away, backwards, so he can still see her face as he fake pouts. “You won’t let me down, right Bonster? Be my party-buddy?”

Teacher bae rolls her eyes and smiles. More sunshine for Kai.

“Fine. I’ll see you Friday.”

And just like that, Kai’s Wednesday afternoon was a lot brighter.

.o.0.0.o.

“Oh. My. God!” Caroline squeals. “It’s a date.”

“It’s not a date.”

“It sounds like a date,” Nora speaks up, glancing up from her phone long enough to smirk at Bonnie. The shorter girl scowls at her roommates for ganging up on her. They were all sitting around the living room in their PJs with their respective snacks and Caroline’s Netflix queue up since it was her turn to control the big T.V. The blonde was a huge Shondaland fangirl, so they were watching How to Get Away With Murder. It was paused when Caroline demanded for Bonnie to tell her why Kai was all smiles after his snack run and Bonnie looked helplessly at Viola Davis’s unimpressed face.

“Guys, it’s not a date. I was going anyway, Care invited me.”

“Yeah, so you could get laid! And Kai is practically front row of the class, waving his hand around, screaming ‘pick me, pick me, Miss Bennett’ and you’re still insisting it’s not a date.”

“Because it isn’t!”

Two pairs of cornflower colored eyes look at her in disbelief.

“He’s my friend. He’s your friend - you invited him too!”

“Oh my god,” Nora muttered at the same time Caroline sputters. “Bonnie, honey, Kai is our friend, but he’s not yours.”

“Yes, he is!”

“He looks at you like a shark smelling blood in the water!” Caroline bursts, having finished short-circuiting. Nora puts her phone down to nod in solidarity of the blonde.

“He wants to fuck you,” she says plainly and Caroline sweeps her hand at the pretty brunette.

“Thank you! And you need it after the Jeremy mess. Besides, I’ve heard around campus that Kai’s pretty good with the,” she makes a catcall whistle.

Bonnie buries her face in her hands and braces herself for a long night. She should have grabbed some wine to go with her lime hot Cheetos.

.o.0.0.o.

Bonnie blanches at the sight of club’s V.I.P. room. It was huge, and per usual for Caroline, who had no sense of limitations when it came to blow-outs, packed with people and free-flowing liquor. It was Caroline’s annual Bloody Valentine party, a sort of weird horror-themed anti-Valentine’s ball - it made no sense for Care to throw it considering her boo’d up status with Klaus Mikaelson, but “it’s tradition, Bonnie!”

The green-eyed beauty leans back against the wall carefully so her roommates wouldn’t yell at her about messing up the hairstyle they did for her. Sipping on her Love Potion drink and watching as writhing bodies got down to Nora’s No Scrubs remix, Bonnie can’t help the flare of disappointment she feels when she’s unable to spot Kai anywhere.

He had to have known she was around - Caroline had stepped up to the mic earlier to play host and introduce Nora as DJ Heartbreaker. So honestly, if the whole party was made aware of her roommates’ arrival half an hour ago, then surely Kai knew she was around.

You’re kidding yourself. He’s probably already drunk and with some girl. You heard Caroline, he has a repu-

“Hello, glad you could make it,” a familiar voice coos in her ear, startling her out of her thoughts. The smell of soap and fresh cologne hits her subtly. “I’ll be your designated extrovert for the evening, if you could please follow me.”

A warm hand wraps around hers and tugs her along to the dance floor and Bonnie inadvertently follows after Kai’s tall form before realization strikes her.

“Kai?” she questions. He glances over his shoulder at her.

“Yeah, party-buddy?”

“Did you just get here?”

“Yeah,” he turns around to face her and pulls her closer, taking her drink and downing the rest in one go. Bonnie is both grateful because she didn’t really like it and appalled because Kai can be so obnoxiously rude sometimes. “Did you miss me?”

The question strikes a nerve and she looks away. “Not really. I just thought you might’ve gotten drunk and forgot we were meeting up.”

“Ouch,” Kai chuckles and draws her in. They start to sway together and Kai’s intense gaze makes Bonnie licks her lips nervously. His stormy eyes narrow in on her mouth at the move and then darken. “I’d never forget about you, Bonster.”

Her heart constricts and she bows her head.

He wants to fuck you.

It’s not like these moments were rare between her and Kai. This...chemistry, this allure, had been there since the first time she’d met the volunteer music tutor two years ago. But back then, she’d been in a long-term relationship with Jeremy and just resisted the pull. She’d been engaged and living together with her fiance, trying to build a future with him - but then of course it fell apart when Jeremy’s ex somehow drifted back into his life and he cheated on Bonnie with her. It had hurt, the disintegration of a relationship she’d held so dear for a while, but after the initial messy dissolution and heartbreak - it didn’t even bother Bonnie like she thinks it should. She’d moved out of their apartment and in with her friends, had pulled herself together and worked her ass off to finish her teacher certification early and now she was employed full-time.

Last month, she saw Jeremy’s announcement on Facebook about Anna’s pregnancy and didn’t even feel an ounce of anger.

But Kai was different. Bonnie wasn’t a coward, but when it came to people and relationships, she wasn’t exactly forthcoming, introverted in the extreme. All of her friends were pretty much the old ones she’s had forever or the new ones who came to her. Kai was of the latter type, always popping up to tease or encourage or piss her off at any given moment, inside and outside of the halls of the elementary they gathered at weekly. His teasing words from earlier hold truth; he was her sort of designated extrovert.

This feeling like electricity, like she could get burned if she got too close, it was always there. And it scared the shit out of her, because if she let Kai happen and he turned out to be another Jeremy...

She wouldn’t be so nonchalant about that. Not if this barely there, unexplored feeling was an indicator.

Suddenly, she’s picked up and twirled around. A huff of laughter is shocked out of her and Kai’s mischievous eyes flash up at her. He lets her down gently, but his arm stays loosely hooked around her waist, his hand just thisclose to grazing her ass. It sends the intrusive thought of what his ringed fingers would feel like squeezing the globes and the spot between her legs clenches.

“There we are. How was your space trip? Did you see the rings of Saturn?”

“No, but I did have tea with a lovely Martian.”

“I’m jealous,” he laughs. He peers down at each other. “You want to get out of here? I mean, I love Caroline and all, but her parties are kind of O-T-T. I’ve got some tea at my place you might like. Some fancy rooibos my sister gave me for our birthday.”

Bonnie swallows and stares up at his face, looking for any signs of deception. She knows it’s not really about the tea. He knows she knows, but he’s willing to pretend if she changes her mind later. He’s giving her a potential escape route. Bonnie nods.

“Yeah, lets go. I’ll text Care later.” Kai grins at her answer and takes her hand again, leading her out of the club. Bonnie can only focus on how well his large hand fits around her small one and the stretch of his shoulders under his denim jacket as she follows him to his car.

.o.0.0.o.

It wasn’t a lie. He did have some fancy rooibos tea tucked away in one of his kitchen cabinets, saved for days when Kai was feeling nostalgic for his family back in Portland and so the box was fairly untouched. He’s sure Bonnie would have liked it, but the second he closes his front door, her hungry mouth was on his and Kai forgot his last name was Parker.

His hands migrate to Bonnie’s hips, gripping them through her lace and sheer dress. He’d wanted to rip the barely-there pink and black fabric off and fuck her like his name was Ron Jeremy the second he saw her, but with her lips pressed to his, right now all he wants is more. More of her body on his, more of her sunshine smiles, more of her disgust with Funyuns and gross preference for hot Cheetos with lime, more of her time. Just...more Bonnie filling the spaces in his world.

Greed was probably going to be his downfall.

Hands sliding from her hips to her ass, Kai grips under her thighs and then hauls her up his body. The petite woman’s legs go around his waist, her arms encircle his neck and suddenly all of Kai’s senses are filled by her. He pulls away from her slightly, breathing in her oddly sweet shampoo.

“Yeah?” he breathes, before his mouth clamps around her neck and sucks.

Bonnie’s answer is the sinful moan that leaves her mouth and the tightening of her limbs around his body. Her nails drag down his back, tugging his denim jacket down and Kai shrugs it off with her help. Their mouths reattach. He takes a few steps forward in the dark, towards the general direction of his bedroom, but forgets trying to navigate when Bon sucks his bottom lip between her teeth and his mouth is suddenly damp with the taste of iron.

His already hardened cock strains even more in his jeans and Kai just laughs, pushing her towards the couch because it’s closer and overstuffed and just as soft as his bed anyway. Bonnie’s hair is rucked, her malachite eyes are heavy-lidded and dark, and her lips swollen and painted red by the blood she lured from his mouth her sharp kiss. She sits up, watching hungrily as Kai shucks his shirt and undoes the front of his jeans, giving his dick some relief from the pressure. Her hands reach out for him, pulling him in as her crawls forward, reclining back into the cushions to give him the freedom to invade her space.

Their mouths meet again. Her dress zipper comes undone beneath his fingers. Kai follows the top’s descent down her body with his tongue, leaving cool trails on her skin. Bonnie had forgone a bra that night, so he latches onto a nipple, sucking as much of her breast into his mouth as can fit, gently rubbing the other into a peak before pinching it harshly - it make her gasp and her body arch into his like a bow, both of her hands burying themselves in his hair. He smiles around the breast in his mouth, glancing up at her with mirth dancing in his eyes. Bonnie swats at his head, but Kai only shoves up the hem of her dress so that the whole thing is belted around her hips, leaving her essentially bare. He presses against her briefly, grinding their groins together teasingly.

“Fuck,” Bonnie utters and Kai likes the way the curse sounds on her tongue.

The long-limbed brunette clasps the seat of her panties with his free hand, feeling the damp and twisting the thin, lacy crotch around his three of his fingers. There’s a threat of removal without actually taking them off, leaving Bonnie exposed to him and the cool air of the apartment. Kai can feel the way her core flutters against his hand, makes himself comfortable in the cradle of her hips as she adjusts herself to fit him there.

Meeting her gaze, Kai deliberately slides one then two fingers, slowly into her core, fingerfucking into her leisurely. Teasing. Bonnie whimpers and it sounds like his name. The small fingers in his hair clench.

Finally releasing the brown nipple in his mouth, Kai blows a breath on it, then laughs at Bonnie’s annoyed groan. The hand making a home of her sex picks up speed and then her irritated sighs melts into appreciative moans and her hands pull him back for another kiss. Thumb pressed to her clit, two then three fingers sliding in and out of Bonnie, Kai plays Bonnie’s body for a few minutes until she’s tensing up, wetting his hand her release and then he’s smiling against her lips, nose bumping hers as he eases off on fingering her slightly to not overstimulate.

“Good?” he breathes. Bonnie nods, eyes half-lidded and dazed.

“Mmm,” she hums, sliding her own hand under the band of his underwear. Kai’s dick is rock hard, the picture of an orgasming Bonnie Bennett, the single hottest thing he’s ever seen. Precum has left a damp spot on his boxers and his tip and Bon’s thumb grazes it, smearing it. Her other hand snakes around his back, squeezing his ass before tugging down the band of his his underwear and jeans.

“Off,” she demands simply and Kai nods obligingly, toeing off his shoes and socks and helping her discard his bottoms. He properly sheds her of her own clothes until at last they’re both bare and flush together and then finally, fucking finally, Kai is sliding inside her warmth, inside Bonnie. He does it again and again, so that they both enjoy it.

It feels good. It feels right. It feels like coming home.

.o.0.0.o.

It’s like maybe one in the morning and after the second time they have sex when the two of them finally get up and drag themselves to Kai’s bed. The next day is Saturday, so neither of them is worried about their respective classes. Kai turns on the T.V. puts on Buffy, but leaves it on a low enough volume so that he can hear Bonnie’s moans as he goes down on her. After her third shuddering orgasm via Kai’s hungry mouth, she pushes him away with a laugh.

“I’m going to die, stop,” she laughs.

“Oh no, not that,” he whispers in mock horror before kissing her again. The science teacher sighs contentedly against his mouth.

Kai smirks as he pulls away, wrapping around her, head on her belly and arms under her back, both of them settling on top of the sheets to cool down. Bonnie’s back is propped up slightly against the pillowed headboard, angling her to better see the T.V. while Kai acts as her human heater.

She gets oddly keyed up the longer they lie there. Kai’s somewhat drowsy, watching Buffy’s misadventures, but Bonnie is really fidgety. The man bites at his teacher bae’s hip half-heartedly.

“Stop wiggling.”

She goes still for a minute, but he can feel the energy building in her body under him. He wonders if she’ll explode if she can’t twitch. He frowns at the thought. He can’t keep her if her guts are splattered all over his wall. Not in the way he wants to at least.

Kai raises his head to look at her.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” She says it too quickly and Kai narrows his eyes at her.

“Bon,” he utters warningly. Don’t lie to me isn’t said, but she hears the implication and sighs.

“This doesn’t have to be awkward,” she tells him. Kai stares at her. She fidgets again and he grabs her hands, stilling her movement and waiting for her to look at him. Bonnie takes a breath and meets his eyes.

“Look, I mean we’re friends, right?” she asks. “I like being your friend. So this can be a one-time thing, you know? Some weekend fun and then we’re friends again. No big deal”

.o.0.0.o.

It’s not like Bonnie doesn’t trust Kai. She does. They are friends despite what Caroline and Nora think and wanting to fuck each other - having fucked each other - doesn’t change that. Bonnie doesn’t want it to change that. She likes having Kai in her life and she wants to keep him there, but his reputation as womanizer makes her weary and so instead of finding some way to progress she panics and tries to regress.

His face is inscrutable as he stares at her and Bonnie is painfully aware that not long ago that same handsome mug was buried between her thighs and making her scream his name. But it’s about as readable as a stonewall now and so she fidgets again.

His hands tighten on hers.

“So what, you want to be friends with benefits for the weekend, then on Monday, it’s business as usual?” his words are a little harsh, but he doesn’t sound mad. He doesn’t sound anything and it makes Bonnie nervous because she can’t read him when he shuts off like this, can’t tell if he’s actually upset with her or considering her words.

“If you’d like,” she says quietly. His stormy eyes flick over her face quickly and suddenly he stands up, naked body making her flush in remembrance and slight embarrassment before he’s out of the room. She hears banging in what she thinks is probably the kitchen and she wonders if she should leave. Kai has a mean streak, she’s seen it - maybe she pissed him off to the point of him wanting to look for a sharp kitchen knife. Suddenly she remembers that the CDC put out some statistics stating that one of the top killers of American women is intimate male partners and she blanches.

Before she can convince herself to run for the hills, Kai is back in the room and dropping something slightly weighted in her lap. It’s an orange and green family-sized chip bag with a cheetah mascot on the front. Bonnie looks up at Kai in amazement when he plops down on the bed with her.

“I have like, a whole shelf in my pantry just full those gross ass chips. I get a bag every time I’m at the store,” he explains.

Bonnie stares at him. “But...you hate hot Cheetos with lime.”

“I know right?” he scoffs. “They’re gross. But you love them.”

Something in Bonnie’s chest constricts and she stares at the naked man in front of her. She thinks she might cry. Or laugh. Something. There’s a lot of feeling building up in her chest so she needs to make sure.

“You buy these for me?”

“Yeah.”

“Why?” she asks softly. Kai smiles and grabs at her hand, entwining their fingers. They slot together well.

“I’m your designated extrovert right? I need my little introvert to have a function.”

.o.0.0.o.

Jo stares at him.

“You got together...over your chip preferences?”

“Yup.” Kai pops the ‘p’. His twin raises an eyebrow at him, a sudden mean gleam in her eye.

“So literally, you only have a girlfriend because you’re the only idiot on Earth who doesn’t like lime hot Cheetos.”

“They’re gross!”

#bonkai #bonkai au #bonkai fanfiction #bonkamily #bonnie x kai #kai x bonnie #bonnie bennett #kai parker

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pa-awesome · 5 years

Text

Small Lies That Escalated Into “This Is My Life Now”

• I was a new graduate student freshly arrived in the US and very poor, and I couldn’t afford a laptop, so the only way I could communicate with my family was to hit up the library and use a public computer to email with them. Eventually my girlfriend back home wanted to skype, and I wanted a little privacy for this if you know what I mean, so I set about finding the most private computer available to me in the library. On a recon mission the day before the Skype, I located a single computer in a conference room and the next morning got up at 7am to account for the time difference and walked into the conference room with my eyes totally focused on the computer. I’d actually walked most of the way in before I realized there was a group of people around the conference table having a ridiculously early morning meeting. The guy at the head of the table, apparently thinking I’d showed up for the meeting and that I was heading towards him, handed me a paper that said “agenda” and said he was so glad a graduate student had shown up, then launched into the most incomprehensible talk about electrodes and chemistry. Meanwhile I know my girlfriend is sitting halfway around the world thinking we’re going to have sexy time Skype and I’m blowing her off and I’m feeling desperate. But everything I knew about US culture was only based on movies, so I have no idea if I can just apologize and leave or what. I miserably sat down for the incomprehensible meeting, rehearsing all the excuses I can give my girlfriend when we talk later. I was barely paying attention. Eventually questions were directed at me and I confess that I’m a new grad student and I don’t know much about the equipment they’re talking about. Everyone excitedly tells me all about it and I still don’t totally understand what they mean, except I’m starting to get that they’re going on a research expedition to [an insanely exciting inaccessible dangerous place] and they’re building a piece of equipment to bring with them. By the end of the meeting I am part of the project. 6 months later I am in [an insanely exciting inaccessible dangerous place] helping to operate this equipment. I appear briefly in the background of a Discovery Channel documentary (only black guy within hundreds of miles so easy to spot). I happily transfer to this other lab and this other field for my fully paid and stipended PhD. I am considered a real go getter, mainly based on my arrival at an early morning meeting no one else wanted to attend. New major, new field, new life because I was too awkward to admit I had just been in the room to sexy skype with my girlfriend.

• My freshman year of college I was walking around campus when a very friendly looking girl waved at me. I’m awkward, so of course I waved back. The next week, the same thing. This began the weirdest saga of my life. For the next two years, we greeted each other as old friends every time we came across the other. She knew my name (somehow?), I never could figure hers out and it was WAY too late to ask. I just pretended I knew who she was and why she knew me. Finally, I joined the honors program and entered my classes for my thesis. Who should be in this class but mystery girl! I was horrified. I wouldn’t be able to pass it off anymore. First day of class we are all sitting there chatting and she greets me by name, again. I had finally learned her name from attendance, thank God. Someone asks, finally, “oh, so do you two know each other? Where’d you meet?” Silence. I stare at her. She stares at me. Finally she breaks down wailing. “I don’t know! I don’t know, okay, we’ve just been waving at each other for two years and it was too late to ask!” Shes standing in my wedding next spring as one of my bridesmaids and very best friends.

• So I’m a visiting nurse and started seeing a patient 3 days/week for wound care. He was a paraplegic and didn’t get out much or have many visitors. He offered me a cup of coffee one morning, but I didn’t know him very well yet and was uneasy about drinking something out of unknown person’s kitchen. Plus, we are really not supposed to, but I could tell he just needed a little company. I told him I drink it black to keep it simple, never planning to have another cup. Next day, I come in and notice a little sticky note on his counter that said “Remember to make fresh pot of coffee for Rachael”. It was so touching to me that I went early every single appointment from that day forward to have a cup of black coffee. I hate black coffee but I felt it was too late to tell him I liked creamer after all. I drank black coffee with him for 3.5 years and he became a good friend until he passed away…

• I was a simple retail employee, basically been doing it since I got out of highschool. Made the old college try but ended up not pursuing anything more than an AA. I worked with a lot of people I really liked and admired for one thing or another and I just wanted to fit in with them. Compared to the stories they told I always felt like I had done nothing with my life or time. One slow day stories are being exchanged and the conversation rolls back to me so I blurted out that I was a photographer in my off time and went on a long history about my years in photography with film and my own dark rooms. I told countless lies about the difficulty of transitioning from film to digital but still kept my old film cameras for certain types of shots. I fucked up. Of course everyone wanted to see my work, I weaseled and told them I would bring stuff in but of course had nothing to show. That night after work I went to bestbuy and maxed out my credit cards to get a lot of camera equipment, indent on a tirade of learning everything I could, signed up for community college courses on every type of photography I could sign up for. All so I could hide the mountain of shame I created. I started taking pictures every morning at dawn and every evening I could get out of work before sunset. I worked as an assistant to a wedding photographer for free for 3 months on top of all that to fill out a portfolio that hadn’t existed up to this point. Everyone was so happy looking at my work that I couldn’t bring myself to stop! I kept at it; I hiked trails that I didn’t think I could hike just to get that perfect hard to find view of a sunrise the next day, I started doing weddings and parties by myself for free to capture the perfect picture out of thousands so I could show it off, I started traveling the world so I could validate the photography adventures I told stories of. It’s been a spiraling mountain of lies, but at the end of the day I discovered my love of photography through them and now it’s my whole career. Three hundred sixty-five days a year and I have never been happier!

• When I first got Married back in 2005, my wife asked me if I like Creamy Peanutbutter. I knew she did, so I told her “Yeah that’s great!”. She buys creamy peanut butter, I buy creamy peanut butter. About 3 years ago, she’s doing some experiment or something with our daughter and she needed chunky peanut butter. I saw it in the pantry and exclaim “Oh chunky peanut butter, I love this stuff!” to which she responds “… You do? I’ve been buying Creamy peanut butter all these years because you told me that was your favorite” So long story a little shorter, we both prefer chunky peanut butter by a large margin, but had been buying creamy for ten years because we both thought it was what the other preferred. Reading that back, we’re pretty boring people. yep :D

• I told my parents i bought a duck when I was 20 to tease them. I found a picture online of one and sent it to them. Sadly, they believed me. They got overly excited about their “grand-duck” and told my whole family. I ended up buying a duck…

• I was homeless, sleeping under a bridge in charlotte near the music factory. I needed a job so I dressed as best I could, which wasn’t very well, walked into a bar on 7th and lied about my work experience. They gave me the job , I started working that day. They paid me cash after every shift. I worked there for three years, became the manager, and now I love cooking. Never cooked a day in my life up till that point. A lady, in her 50s,who was acting as the kitchen manager trained me. She knew I lied, but she also knew I was in trouble. I couldn’t even cut a tomato. She saved my life. She didn’t tell anyone and kept training me even though sometimes I’d piss her off but I always tried to do better. I got an apartment a month into the job using another cook to call the apartment and let them know how much I get paid cause they wanted that for some reason. I was getting paid $11 under the table so nothing was on record which is why he had to call. I worked as a line cook immediately. It was overwhelming. I’m not from the city and the work was fast paced. I would study on my time off by watching youtube and cooking at home.

• I was looking for a job and I didn’t want to be a fast food manager anymore so I fluffed out my resume with computer skills I didn’t have. I was contacted by a recruiter who asked me some questions to gauge my abilities and I straight googled the answers as he was asking them. When I went to the interview, the boss had all of these circuit boards sitting all over his desk. I recognized them as Raspberry pis from Reddit. So I asked what he was using them for. The rest of the interview was just this guy bragging about all of these projects he had going on. He might as well have been speaking Greek. I just feigned interest and said wow a lot. I’m hired. Who knows how this shit happened but I have literally googled every problem I have been given. Day 543, they still think I know what I’m doing.I’m making 1.5 times what I was making as a manager. I have a GED for christsakes.

• I have one. A good friend of mine did not have an umbrella on a very rainy day. One of her coworkers offered her a lift home. One lift home turned into two, then three, until he was shuttling her to and from work everyday for months. This coworker is also a very good baker, he would make these lovely cakes and pastries and offer them to her which she politely took, every day. Then one afternoon, on her way home, he stops and picks up his parents. He happily introduces her as his girlfriend. She was shocked by this title to say the least.They proceeded to invite her to a family gathering over the long weekend to meet EVERYONE. His parents, they were so nice, she accepted because she didn’t have the heart to embarrass the guy. She went to the gathering, met with other family members and he kept introducing her as his girlfriend. She never worked up the nerve to correct or stop him. Long story short they are now married.

• Not me but my Dad. We moved and he was convinced the postman’s name was ‘Ger’ as in short for Gerry. He greeted him by it, nearly every day for about 10 years. We even gave him a Christmas card which he displayed down in the sorting office. Fast forward and we have a temporary post man, my Mum asking him after a few weeks 'When is Ger coming back?’ This was met with stunned silence and a puzzled look, with a resounding 'Who is Ger? No one works in the locality by that name’ Turns out, his name is Declan and he was too nice to correct my Dad for close to a decade.

• I didn't want to go to dinner with the gang from work, including my boss, so I told them I was having dinner with my wife and her parents. I lied. I get home, wife wants to go out to dinner. So, we head to the restaurant, and just as we're getting near the door, I see the work gang with my loudmouth boss all piling out of their cars. What are odds of us picking the same restaurant? Shit. Busted. There was an old couple walking into the restaurant in front of us. I held the door for them, and insisted they join us for dinner. They were quite perplexed, but accepted my offer of a free dinner. It was the most uncomfortable dinner ever. They had no clue who we were, none of us had any shared interests... they rushed through dinner, thanked us, and got the hell away from what I'm sure they thought were a couple of weirdos.

• Told a small lie to a girl I was texting that I love running, dunno how it sold because I was fat. Started running the second after I sent that. 5 years later I went from 298 to 180. Not bad.

• This is one that doesn't bother me. I had a coworker with memory issues or dementia and he called me Kevin once in awhile, not my name obviously. It made me laugh and one of my coworkers started calling me Kevin and telling new employees that's my name. This was 3 years ago and it is still going. at the same time I told my son who thought it was hilarious, and somehow it morphed into me calling him Kevin, and my cat too. So I would yell downstairs, "Kevin, is Kevin down there?". My son told his best friend, and they started calling each other Kevin. Now when I see my son's friend I call him Kevin. for this story to come full circle, my son and said friend came to my office and I introduced them as my son Kevin and his friend Kevin. also my sister now calls my son Kevin.

• 40 years ago, when I was my final secondary school (high-school) year, I decided that I wanted to be a Civil Engineer and study Civil Engineering. My father, who probably had some doubts about my choice, arranged for me to spend a week in a civil engineering office owned my a friend of his. I spent a week there and definitely knew one thing afterwards - that I did not want to become a Civil Engineer! So... a couple of months later, I was walking through the centre of town and met the owner of the Civil Engineering company that I had spent the week with. He says: "Hey, 1000000CHF, how are you? Still planning on becoming a Civil Engineer?" I'm a bit flustered (as I often was at that age) and don't know what to say, so I say: "No, actually I've decided to study eh... hmm... Computer Science" (The 1st lie) He says: "That's great. A career for the future." We say good-day and go upon our separate ways. A few weeks later, while I'm actually sitting my final school exams, he calls me and says "Hey, 1000000CHF, I'm starting a computer company, would you like to join?" I say: "But, but... I'm about to start University to study Computer Science" (The reinforcement of the 1st lie) He says: "Great! We'll pay your University and you work all your spare hours for us." So I was trapped. Because of my lies I ended up studying Computer Science in a top University and getting a great degree and postgrad degree while earning a full income on the side (this was the 80s). But the silver-lining was that I actually fell into a career that I absolutely love and never want to quit. Forty years later I still get enthusiastic about interesting new technologies and have created two successful I.T. companies that are still operating. I'm actually in the process of creating another this month. Despite the management tasks, I still succeed in spending over 70% of my time doing what I love - developing modern, quality software. Clients and developers that work with me respect my opinions and are very often surprised at how I stay on top of the technology trends. But what I really derive my career satisfaction from is knowing that there are millions of people out there using software that I designed and wrote every day.

• One time when I was 17, I was hanging out at my then-girlfriend's house with her and her little sister. Little sister was watching Spongebob and they jumped up to go in the other room leaving me along to watch TV. Being polite, I didn't change the channel. In walks mom and sees me watching Spongebob and she asks me "Hey IHABTom, you like that show?" I reply, again trying to be polite, "Yep!" So every year since then I've gotten Spongebob SOMETHING from my now-wife's parents. I'm 33. I hate that sponge.

• In 4th grade I lied and said I was going to a track meet to impress some friends in class when the teacher asked if anyone was going. I went home and told my mom I needed to sign up for it. I was never good at athletics at this time in my life. I ended up going to the track meet, it was a 400m race I was entered in, I remember the moment the gun went off I immediately went into a mode I had never remotely gone into before, I was actually ultra competitive for once in my life. I was neck and neck with another kid for the first place spot the entire race, and going into the final stretch I felt like puking and every fiber of my body was burning and he was pulling away. Something came over me and I kicked it into psycho mode and pushed past him for the win and my legs felt like noodles and I collapsed and couldn’t get back up. That race qualified me for a regional meet, I did that one and won again in similar fashion, then went to the state meet and got my ass handed to me. That started me down a long line of running long distance which involved being one of the best in the nation in high school and getting a scholarship to run in college, and trust me the training at that level consumes your life (100 mile weeks), so it was definitely my life at that point.

• This is pretty harmless but when I first met my boyfriend he was telling me about his Star Wars Lego collection and I, being polite, said something like "Oh Wow, I love Lego." Because I did love Lego, when I was 10. This was about 5 years ago and I think adult Lego was just becoming a really big thing, with the Creator houses and modular sets. Anyway, he took this comment and ran with it, as all the little gifts he bought me for the first few years of our relationship were Lego based. A little cottage set, pretty cute. A rebuildable calendar, practical and cute. A house that's a pen holder, I'm ok with that. I would photograph the completed sets and put them on instagram and then other people started buying me Lego sets and minifigures. And before I knew it my entire living room was basically Lego. I did admit to my boyfriend last year that I wasn't as into Lego as everyone assumed - people send me links to the newest products and anything even remotely Lego based on Facebook. He knew, but enjoyed building sets with me anyway and I seemed to have fun doing it. Which I did. But at some point I just sat on my couch and looked at all these plastic bricks that I was surrounded with and asked myself how this even happened.

• Wasn't a drinker in high school so to shut down peer pressure I told them I was born with half a liver and drinking anything could make me very sick or kill me. The lie just became natural and followed me to college. Was out with some friends playing pool and decided to have a beer. When I came back, a buddy slapped it out of my hand thinking I was suicidal. Then the explanations began...

• I was really desperate for an A on my final project for Chinese so I asked my mom(who's a native speaker) for help. Well it worked, the teacher was impressed and I got the grade I wanted... but next year I had the same teacher and she had really high expectations. I end up studying for hours every day while asking my mom to help with my homework for months. Eventually my Chinese got to a point where my mom would look at it and almost always confirm that it was correct(and not grammatically awkward). So yeah. Learned a language to cover up cheating on a single project the year prior.

• My husband works as a data analyst and codes programs and apps for the business side of the company. Once they make an app, it needs an icon to go along with it when it launches. They usually use the company designer, but one day one of his co-workers submitted an icon design for their new app (one my husband had worked on) and others followed. People kept submitting art, so they made it a contest (no prize, just glory). When he got home, he told me about it and then asked if I was interested in joining. That night I did a quick design, he fell in love with it, and asked me to finish it so he could submit it. So I did... Time passed, my drawing won, and they made it the app icon. Eveything was great, until the day his team was in a meeting with the company VP. The VP had heard about the icon competition and asked who had submitted the winning app icon. One of my husband's co-workers quickly called out his name before he could say anything. The VP was impressed and then said that he deserved a reward (money reward) for his work. Surprised and too embarrassed to correct the VP, my husband just stayed quiet. Not denying the information made everyone believe he was the artist. He doesn't have an artistic bone in his body. When he got home, he told me the story and gave me the money for my work. I thought it would end there... but it didn't! When their next app was ready for launch someone asked him to make an icon for them because they loved his previous design. He could have put an end to the misinformation then but he was too embrassed, so he said yes. He got home and asked me to make the icon, he even said he would pay me. I found the situation hilarious so, after laughing at him, I agreed... plus I was getting paid. This has gone on for a while (about 3 years), I have made about 5 icons for the company under my husband's name. He has been pretty dedicated to keeping up the lie all these years. He has asked me about my process of thought when I draw, so he can tell his co-workers about his method. He asked me about my tablet and the program I use. He brain storms about the drawings with his co-workers and tells me what they want. And when I'm too busy to draw, he tells his co-workers how HE is too busy to draw. By now it's our little secret and it has turned into an inside joke. Right now I'm supposed to draw a new icon but I have been so busy that I haven't had time. So when I see him playing games or chilling on the couch I tease him by saying, "Shouldn't you be drawing right now?"

#repost #story #liar #lies

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katsvra · 7 years

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WAS TAGGED BY: my moon, @lahviis thank you so much tania <3

TAGGING: @castleoblivions @durararas @ryuzakki @sougu @azumanei @josay and @ryoutakises (only if you want to ofc!!)

RULES: ANSWER THESE 85 STATEMENTS AND TAG 20 PEOPLE

THE LAST

1. DRINK: water 2. PHONE CALL: my best friend 3. TEXT MESSAGE: my manager 4. SONG YOU LISTENED TO: hello, brooklyn - all time low 5. TIME YOU CRIED: last week, i was feeling a bit lost 6. DATED SOMEONE TWICE: lmao nah 7. KISSED SOMEONE AND REGRETTED IT: nope 8. BEEN CHEATED ON: nope 9. LOST SOMEONE SPECIAL: yes 10. BEEN DEPRESSED: yes 11. GOTTEN DRUNK AND THROWN UP: nope

3 FAVOURITE COLOURS

12. pink 13. blue 14. any pastel

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU 15. MADE NEW FRIENDS: yes!!!! 16. FALLEN OUT OF LOVE: nope 17. LAUGHED UNTIL YOU CRIED: absolutely 18. FOUND OUT SOMEONE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU: no 19. MET SOMEONE WHO CHANGED YOU: yes 20. FOUND OUT WHO YOUR FRIENDS ARE: yes 21. KISSED SOMEONE ON YOUR FACEBOOK LIST: omg no GENERAL 22. HOW MANY OF YOUR FACEBOOK FRIENDS DO YOU KNOW IN REAL LIFE: most of them, i only have 2 or 3 online friends on facebook 23. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS: yeah, i have cichlids 24. DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR NAME: not anymore 25. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY: my friends held me a surprise bday party at uni ^^ 26. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP: around 10 am 27. WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT: replaying fire emblem: echoes 28. NAME SOMETHING YOU CAN’T WAIT FOR: anime date with the squad this thursday!!! ALSO FOR ONE OF MY FRIENDS TO COME TO CANADA NEXT YEAR !! 29. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR MOM: last night ;; 31. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW: the game grumps TTYD lets play 32. HAVE YOU EVER TALKED TO A PERSON NAMED TOM: tommy, yeah 33. SOMETHING THAT IS GETTING ON YOUR NERVES: people who pretend to care and be there for you but in reality, they dont care 34. MOST VISITED WEBSITE: tumblr or twitter 35. HAIR COLOUR: naturally black but i dyed it a copper red 36. LONG OR SHORT HAIR: its a bit past my shoulder so longish? a lot shorter than what im used to 37. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON SOMEONE: lmao i dont think ive ever had a crush on anyone 38. WHAT DO YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF: my hair is really thick and healthy so i can pmuch do anything to it without worrying 39. PIERCINGS: one on each ear 40. BLOOD TYPE: A i think?? 41. NICKNAME: carz, carmine, sunshine (courtesy of brie ^^) 42. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: single 43. ZODIAC: virgo 44. PRONOUNS: she/her 45. FAVOURITE TV SHOW: i dont watch tv anymore ;; 46. TATTOOS: none 47. RIGHT OR LEFT HANDED: right 48. SURGERY: none 50. SPORT: swimming, skating & taekwondo but i dropped all of them ;;; (kinda want to get back into martial arts tho) 51. VACATION: just came back from quebec and it was gorgeous ;; 52. PAIR OF TRAINERS: none but i need to get a pair for the gym ;;;

MORE GENERAL 53. EATING: cantaloupe 54. DRINKING: green tea 55. I’M ABOUT TO: clean my room or workout, idk 56. WAITING FOR: my iida pop figure to arrive on the 30th ;;; 57. WANT: my cats back, i miss them a lot ;;; 58. GET MARRIED: lmao i dont even see myself in a relationship at any point in the future 59. CAREER: i want something related to the environment or to animal care but realistically, ill be going into nursing (if i get into the grad program ;;)

WHICH IS BETTER:

60. HUGS OR KISSES: hugs 61. LIPS OR EYES: eyes 62. SHORTER OR TALLER: taller 63. OLDER OR YOUNGER: older 64. NICE ARMS OR NICE STOMACH: both !! 65. HOOK UP OR RELATIONSHIP: relationship 66. TROUBLEMAKER OR HESITANT: a bit of both would be nice haha

HAVE YOU EVER: 67. KISSED A STRANGER: no 68. DRANK HARD LIQUOR: lmao yeah 69. LOST GLASSES/CONTACT LENSES: yeah ;;; 70. TURNED SOMEONE DOWN: yes 71. SEX ON THE FIRST DATE: no 72. BROKEN SOMEONE’S HEART: kind of. in grade 8, a boy asked me out but one of my “friends” basically bullied me into rejecting him and he was really upset ;; (tbh its still one of my biggest regrets, he was really nice) 73. HAD YOUR HEART BROKEN: by friends, ya 74. BEEN ARRESTED: no 75. CRIED WHEN SOMEONE DIED: yeah.. 76. FALLEN FOR A FRIEND: nope

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 77. YOURSELF: no but im really trying haha. but i’ll keep acting like i do because fake it till you make it lmao 78. MIRACLES: no 79. LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT: no 80. SANTA CLAUS: lmao no 81. KISS ON THE FIRST DATE: ?? i guess it depends 82. ANGELS: i believe some of my friends are angels lmao. but no, i dont believe in angels.

OTHER: 84. EYE COLOUR: really dark brown, like where is my pupil? 85. FAVOURITE MOVIE: howl’s moving castle or lord of the rings trilogy

#thanks for tagging me!!#this took a while to finish haha #tag games #.txt #carmen talks

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shimashimashippo · 7 years

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Tag: 92 Questions

Tagged by @neon-lake :D

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people.

(when i got tagged in this, #19, 34, 49, 54, 60, 61, 69 and 89 were missing so i made a few questions up for those and put an asterisk* next to them. feel free to keep my questions or make up your own for those!)

LAST:

1. Drink: water 2. Phone call: roommate 3. Text message: one of my bio TAs 4. Song you listened to: Pastel (Snail’s House x Moe Shop) [x] 5. Time you cried: I don’t remember

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: no 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: no 8. Been cheated on: no 9. Lost someone special: no (well, i’ve lost contact with some people i really liked; so if that counts, then yeah i suppose. but has anyone died? no.) 10. Been depressed: yes 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: nah

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12. light red (#f95c5c) 13. mint (#b2ffd6) 14. probably anything pastel (blue?) / white / black

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: yeah! 16. Fallen out of love: no, because i didn’t even get that far before i decided to do a 180 and see myself out 17. Laughed until you cried: not that i can remember 18. Found out someone was talking about you: no but i wouldn’t be surprised if people were talking about me. idk man i just don’t enjoy working with people who don’t pull their weight and get mad at me for not being happy about their laziness?? 19*. Tried something new: yeah! i got a pedicure for the first time with a friend who actually was a grad student and also my intro to literature professor LOL 20. Found out who your friends are: well, i found a few who are not for sure and that’s probably the best i’ll get. 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: NO.

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: i want to say all except one. 23. Do you have any pets: no 24. Do you want to change your name: legally, maybe. nothing extreme. i just want to remove a part of my name, namely (ha!) my american name because the rest of my name is in vietnamese (yes, that means i have two first names) and no one calls me by my american name because i make sure that doesn’t happen. 25. What did you do for your last birthday: i think i went out for dinner and gelato 26. What time do you wake up: weekdays – depends on what classes i have during the school year / see weekends during the summer; weekends – 9-11 am

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: watching videos on stats / RNA-seq / bioinformatics stuff on YouTube [x][x][x][x]. he explains things pretty well! i’m still at a loss for heatmaps though. i mean, just look at them!! 28. Name something you can’t wait for: fall / winter 29. When was the last time you saw your mom? today 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: can i obtain the knowledge and wisdom to stop questioning my self-worth so much 31. What are you listening to right now: 脱法ロック (めいちゃん) [x] 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: yes! 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: people who say, “日本語が悪い” and act like they can speak japanese but cLEARLY CANNOT AND UNFORTUNATELY WON’T SHUT UP. 34*. Fun fact about you: i skipped kindergarten 35. Mole(s): yeah 36. Mark(s): yep

37. Childhood dream: the oh-so-vague “scientist” though i think at the time i was thinking more along the lines of astrophysics because i was very into space and the cosmos 38. Hair color: black 39. Long or short hair: short 40. Do you have a crush on someone: thankfully not 41. What do you like about yourself: i (work to) get what i want. 42. Piercings: nope 43. Blood type: idk 44. Nicknames? none? 45. Relationship status: single

46. Zodiac: capricorn 47. Pronouns: she/her 48. Favorite TV Show: i don’t watch tv 49*. Favorite food(s): probably pad thai / (deep-fried) sushi 50. Right or left hand: right 51. Surgery: nope 52. Hair dyed in different color: no 53. Sport: running away from my fears and responsibilities 54*. MBTI / Enneagram: INTP (probably if not some strange INTX for all i know) / type 5 (very much so) 55. Vacation: always great 56. Pair of trainers: what?

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating: nothing at the moment 58. Drinking: water 59. I’m about to: learn how to program with python :( 60*. Thinking: that this is a long list of questions 61*. Feeling: meh 62. Want: to know everything and i want to know it all now!

63. Get married: well, i’m not counting on it. 64. Career: some sort of molecular biological research maybe

65. Hugs or kisses: hugs are nice. (and maybe a kiss on the cheek every once in a while from very specific people only, idk??????) 66. Lips or eyes: eyes 67. Shorter or taller: it’s not very hard to be taller than me (5′2″) so… it’s not really like i have a choice 68. Older or younger: probably older??? because i’m younger than most in my year anyway???? 69*. Smart or kind: why not both? if i had to choose one, probably the latter, though. 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: uh 71. Sensitive or loud: not loud. 72. Hook up or relationship: relationship 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a Stranger: no 75. Drank hard liquor: no 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: no 77. Turned someone down: the dude told me he found me intellectually attractive and i replied without skipping a beat (or really, without thinking) that i didn’t think i’d ever be able to find him attractive and i was very casual about it all OOPS. he was mad / sad at me for a while. 78. Sex on the first date: NONONONONO. 79. Broken someone’s heart: um. 80. Had your heart broken: yeah probably 81. Been arrested: NOPE. 82. Cried when someone died: probably 83. Fallen for a friend: uh, well, i started getting interested and then nOPE.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84: Yourself: pfft 85. Miracles: no 86. Love at first sight: probably not 87. Santa Claus: nope 88. Kiss on the first date: hm… 89*. God / some omniscient and omnipotent being: not strictly religious. there could be something out there for all we know. similarly, maybe there isn’t anything out there.

OTHER:

90. Current best friend name: sorry, too busy defining the term “best friend” for myself and i also don’t want to jinx it 91. Eye color: dark brown 92. Favorite movie: i don’t really have one but anything from lord of the rings / chronicles of narnia / harry potter is good!

Tagging: @justanoddlittlebird and anyone else who sees this and wants to do it! feel free to say that i tagged you.

#about me #tagged

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kaekami · 7 years

Text

Thanks for the tag minion @selphie-chan!!

LAST…

[1] drink: Sakura milk tea!! It was soooo tasty!

[2] phone call: My area manager orz

[3] text message: Shortbuddy!!

[4] song you listened to: Lillie’s theme remix by Mewmore

[5] time you cried: Today when I was crying from laughing so hard while hugging my milk tea.

HAVE YOU EVER…

[6] dated someone twice: No

[7] been cheated on: Yeah

[8] kissed someone and regretted it: Nope

[9] lost someone special: Yeah

[10] been depressed: Sad yes, but truly depressed? I don’t think so.

[11] gotten drunk and thrown up: Nope

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS:

[12] Teal

[13] Blue

[14] Red

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU…

[15] made new friends: Yes

[16] fallen out of love: nope!

[17] laughed until you cried: Yes!! Just today actually!

[18] found out someone was talking about you: Yep, but usually it is good things not bad? Or definitely more good than bad

[19] met someone who changed you: Yeah

[20] found out who your true friends are: I already knew

[21] kissed someone on your facebook list: Yep!

GENERAL…

[22] how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: Most of them!

[23] do you have any pets: Yes, I have two kitties, Bee and Grumpycat!

[24] do you want to change your name: Naw

[25] what did you do for your last birthday: Had the shared bday party, and also chilled with my boy for my actually bday

[26] what time did you wake up: 9am

[27] what were you doing at midnight last night: Playing Zelda!

[29] when was the last time you saw your mother: Ten minutes ago

[30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: Mm, probably be more confident with applying for jobs/grad programs, and being more certain on what to pursue I guess?

[31] what are you listening to right now: Courtroom Revolutionaire by adrisaurus

[32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: Yep! I’ve known a couple Toms!

[33] something that is getting on your nerves: How loud the mall was from Paw Patrol was driving me nuts earlier

[34] most visited website: Serebii, then Tumblr

[35] elementary: It was okay, got bullied a lot, was super unpopular, but I got by

[36] high school: Had a good group of friends, still super unpopular

[37] college: Pretty good! I sometimes wonder what it would of been like if I aimed for a psych major instead

[38] hair colour: I DON’T EVEN KNOW ANYMORE. Really dark blonde? IDK

[39] long or short hair: Medium right now, but I keep it kinda short usually

[40] do you have a crush on someone: I have many anime and fictional character crushes, as well as my real life crush (spoiler alert: it’s my bf)

[41] what do you like about yourself?: My determination and optimism

[42] piercings: Yep! Just my ears

[43]blood type: Probably AB, but not sure

[44] nickname: Squishy / Jellybean / Boss / Crumpet / Gumdrop / Kaida / Azure / Kat / Kittycat / Kitty

[45] relationship status: Happily taken!

[46] zodiac sign: Sagittarius

[47] pronouns: She/Her

[48] fav tv show: UMMM that is really hard to decide. Most recently I enjoyed Channel Zero (I highly recommend it to my friends who love Stranger Things) and Stranger Things.

[49] tattoos: Nope

[50] right or left handed: Right

FIRST…

[51] surgery: Only my wisdom teeth

[52] piercing: Only my ears!

[53] best friend: Was in elementary school, but my first best friend that was a keeper was my minion!

[54] sport: Swimming!

[55] vacation: Probably Sudbury, visiting relatives

[56] pair of trainers: Who remembers that?

RIGHT NOW…

[57] eating: Nope

[58] drinking: Tea

[59] i’m about to: Draw a bit and then go to bed

[60] listening to: 6teen

[61] waiting for: tomorrow so I can see my friends and go to a Stag and Doe party!

[62] want: more time to game!

[63] get married: Not in any rush. Rather live with the guy for a year at least.

[64] career: Not sure but I’ll figure it out!

WHICH IS BETTER…

[65] hugs or kisses: Hugs

[66] lips or eyes: Eyes

[67] shorter or taller: Taller

[68] older or younger: Older.

[70] nice arms or nice stomach: Both are really good! Tbh, I have grown to really enjoy a bigger tummy. So cuddly and nice to sleep on.

[71] sensitive or loud: I guess sensitive?

[72] hook up or relationship: Relationship

[73] troublemaker or hesitant: I like a bit of each, cuz I know I can be a shit

HAVE YOU EVER…

[74] kissed a stranger? No

[75] drank hard liquor? I drink vodka, rum, and Baileys, that’s pretty much it

[76] lost glasses/contact lenses? Nope

[77] turned someone down: Yes

[78] sex on first date? NOOOO

[79] broken someone’s heart? Not sure

[80] had your own heart broken? Yeeeep

[81] been arrested? Nope

[82] cried when someone died? Yes

[83] fallen for a friend: Yep

DO YOU BELIEVE IN…

[84] yourself? Mostly yeah!

[85] miracles? To a certain extent, yep! Gotta enjoy the little things!

[86] love at first sight? Nope!

[87] santa claus? OF COURSE. My dad and I always leave cookies for Santa, ahaha.

[89] angels? Nope!

OTHER…

[90] current best friend’s name: Got too many!

[91] eye colour: Blue-green? Idk

[92] favourite movie: Stardust and Spirited Away are probably my top two

I tag anyone who wants to do this!

#kat does memes

0 notes

douchebagbrainwaves · 4 years

Text

I'VE BEEN PONDERING TOPLEVEL

Object-oriented abstractions. Incidentally, nothing makes it more patently obvious that the old chestnut all languages are equivalent is false than designing languages. 80% of the time you get to social questions, many changes are just fashion. Except for some books in math and the hard sciences.1 These people's opinions change with every wind. I'm inclined to think there isn't—that good design has to be new—that it didn't predict anything. A few hundred thousand, perhaps, out of billions. What can't we say? But, as in more recent times indecent, improper, and unamerican have been.2 A friend of mine asked Ryan about this, it was even better than C; and plug-and-chug undergrads, who are amazed to find that there is something wrong with you if you thought things you didn't dare say out loud.3

I'm just stupid, or have sex, or eat some delicious food, than work on hard problems. This second group adopt the fashion not because they want to do more than just shock everyone with the heresy du jour. Com signals strength even if it is a huge win in developing software to have an interactive toplevel, what in Lisp is called a read-eval-print loop. In the process of developing the pitch for the first conference, someone must have decided they'd better take a stab at explaining what that 2. No one does that kind of thing for fun.4 Back in the days of fanfold, there was a new kind of computer that's as well designed as a Bang & Olufsen stereo system, and underneath is the best Unix machine you can buy individual songs instead of having to buy whole albums. But it's harder than it looks. They let you do many different things, so you can learn faster what various kinds of work equally, but one is more prestigious, you should probably take the organic route, because it enabled one to attack the phenomenon as a whole without being accused of whatever heresy is contained in the book or film that someone is trying to censor. This article is derived from a keynote talk at the fall 2002 meeting of NEPLS.

The philosophy's there, but it's too late for them to do anything more than the name of the Web 2. And why? Now it means a smaller, younger, more technical group that just decided to make something great. The first sentence of this essay explains that.5 This metric needs fleshing out, and it is a huge and rapidly growing business.6 The reason this won't turn into a second Bubble is that the side that's shocked is most likely to get good design you have to get close, and stay close, to your users.7 If you can think things so outside the box that people call innovative.8 There's no other name as good. Com of your name is that it lets you jump over obstacles. The 2005 Web 2. If you want to fight back, there are several ideas mixed together in the concept of spare time seems mistaken.9

If you work hard at being a bond trader for ten years, just walk around the CS department at a good university. If smaller source code is the purpose of comparing languages, because they will probably use small problems, and will necessarily use predefined problems, will tend to bet wrong. This is an interesting question. Type of x first. Sun now pretends that Java is a grassroots, open-source language effort like Perl or Python.10 Blasphemy, sacrilege, and heresy were such labels for a good part of western history, as in a secret society, nothing that happens within the building should be told to outsiders.11 Explaining himself later, he said I don't do litmus tests. 0 applied to music would probably mean individual bands giving away DRMless songs for free. He wanted to spend his time thinking about biology, not arguing with people who accused him of being an atheist. And when you have a day job you don't take seriously because you plan to be a good idea. Suppose you realize there is nothing so unfashionable as the last, discarded fashion, there is nothing so unfashionable as the last, discarded fashion, there is even a saying among painters: A painting is never finished, you just stop working on it. But it's not enough just to tell people that.12

When people say Web 2. Who will? The m. Morale is another reason that it's hard to imagine a language being too succinct is that if you're building something new, you should probably take the organic route. And if it isn't false, it shouldn't be suppressed. Their only hope now is to buy all the best Ajax startups before Google does. Most unpleasant jobs would either get automated or go undone if no one happens to have gotten in trouble for seem harmless now. The quantity of meaning compressed into a small space by algebraic signs, is another circumstance that facilitates the reasonings we are accustomed to carry on by their aid.13 Notice all this time I've been talking about the succinctness of languages, not of individual programs.14 You might find contradictory taboos. There are two routes to that destination: The organic route is more common. But it was also something we'd never considered a computer could be: fabulously well designed.

For example, it is a bad design decision. It seems so convincing when you see statements being attacked as x-ist or y-ic substitute your current values of x and y, whether in 1630 or 2030, that's a sure sign that something is wrong.15 As far as I know, without precedent: Apple is popular at the low end and the high end, but not accurate ones. Surely one had to force oneself to work on them. Bolder investors will now get rewarded with lower prices. Does Web 2.16 But I don't think you can even talk about good or bad design except with reference to some intended user.17 But these words are part of the reason I chose computers.

And if you're ambitious you have to like what you do? If you expressed the same ideas in prose as mathematicians had to do before they evolved succinct notations, they wouldn't be any easier to read, because the paper would grow to the size of a book. What do you do with it? Object-oriented programming generates a lot of popular sites were quite high-handed about it.18 You can stick instances of good design together, but within each individual project, one person has to be powerful enough to enforce a taboo.19 Comparison The first person to write the program in some other way that was shorter. Nearly all of it falls short of the standard, I think, is that a restrictive language is one that isn't succinct enough. The programmers I admire most are not, on the whole, captivated by Java.20 80% of the time we could find at least one good name in a 20 minute office hour slot. When you hear such labels being used, ask why. It seems fitting to us that kids' ideas should be bright and clean. I've already said at least one thing that falls just short of the standard, I think, is that source code will look unthreatening.

Notes

When Harvard kicks undergrads out for doing badly and is doomed anyway.

But having more of it, but if you repair a machine that's broken because a she is very common, to mean the company is Weebly, which allowed banks and savings and loans to buy your kids' way into top colleges by sending them to go to grad school you always feel you should be protected against such tricks will approach.

When Harvard kicks undergrads out for here, since 95% of the growth is valuable, and b when she's nervous, she expresses it by smiling more. There are fields now in which only a sliver of it, and Smartleaf co-founders Mark Nitzberg and Olin Shivers at the network level, and yet it is because those are guaranteed in the case of heirs, professors, politicians, and the ordering system, written in Lisp. An investor who for some reason insists that you wouldn't mind missing, false positives caused by filters will have to replace the actual server in order to provoke a bidding war between 3 pet supply startups for the first type, and their flakiness is indistinguishable from those of dynamic variables were merely optimization advice, and this trick merely forces you to test whether that initial impression holds up.

There were a first—. It's conceivable that the payoff for avoiding tax grows hyperexponentially x/1-x for 0 x 1.

The IBM 704 CPU was about bands. This phenomenon is not the only way to fight back themselves. Why does society foul you? The reason Google seemed a miracle of workmanship.

If anyone wants to invest in your own mind. All you have is so hard on Google. The danger is that it's boring, we used to reply that they think the usual way will prove to us an old-fashioned idea.

In desperation people reach for the explanation of a press hit, but it's not lots of customers is that the founders.

Another advantage of startups that seem promising can usually get enough money from them. According to a super-angels. But it turns out to be low. This would penalize short comments especially, because to translate this program into C they literally had to ask, what you care about Intel and Microsoft, not you.

The original Internet forums were not web sites but Usenet newsgroups. He was off by only about 2%.

Since most VCs are only slightly richer for having these things. There is no longer written in C and Perl. This prospect will make it a function of the rule of thumb, the space of ideas doesn't have to keep their wings folded, as they do.

The relationships between unions and unionized companies can hire a lot of the business, and only one.

But so many still make you take out your anti-immigration people to endure hardships, but countless other startups must have believed since before people were people. So if you have to do, so the number of startups will generally raise large amounts of new inventions until they become well enough known that people working for large settlements earlier, but historical abuses are easier for us, the more important. Which OS? He devoted much of the 1929 crash.

If you want to invest at a 5 million cap, but that it's doubly important for societies to remember and pass on the aspect they see and say that's not art because it is unfair when someone works hard and not others, and post-money valuations of funding rounds are at selling it. Surely it's better if everything just works.

On the way to pressure them to. To paint from life using the same reason parents don't tell the craziest lies about me. The word regressive as applied to tax avoidance.

That can be said to have discovered something intuitively without understanding all its implications. But what they're capable of. SpamCop—. A larger set of good ones.

But let someone else start those startups. In fact, change what it would certainly be less than the previous round.

Investors influence one another indirectly through the buzz that surrounds a hot deal, I didn't. At any given person might have 20 affinities by this standard, and one VC. They'd be interchangeable if markets stood still.

After reading a draft of this desirable company, and configure domain names etc. As a friend who invested in the future as barbaric, but even there people tend to be more precise, and once a hypothesis starts to be about web-based applications greatly to be about web-based applications.

I put it would be reluctant to start software companies constrained in b. Emmett Shear, and instead focus on growth instead of using special euphemisms for lies that seem excusable according to certain somewhat depressing rules many of the big acquisition offers most successful startups get started in Mississippi.

This phenomenon may account for a long thread are rarely seen, so if you're measuring usage you need, maybe you'd start to be, unchanging, but investors can get for 500 today would say that hapless meant unlucky.

#automatically generated text #Markov chains #Paul Graham #Python #Patrick Mooney #fall #questions #customers #computer #draft #design

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douchebagbrainwaves · 4 years

Text

STARTUP IN FOUNDERS TO MAKE WEALTH

Would it be useful to have an explicit belief in change. And I think that's ok. Mihalko seemed like he actually wanted to be our friend. Grad school is the other end of the humanities. Indirectly, but they pay attention.1 US, its effects lasted longer. Together you talk about some hard problem, probably getting nowhere.

Informal language is the athletic clothing of ideas. Why? They got to have expense account lunches at the best restaurants and fly around on the company's Gulfstreams. Meaning everyone within this world was low-res: a Duplo world of a few big hits, and those aren't them. It's not true that those who teach can't do. Or is it?2 I think much of the company.

Part of the reason is prestige. If you define a language that was ideal for writing a slow version 1, and yet with the right optimization advice to the compiler, would also yield very fast code when necessary.3 Of course, prestige isn't the main reason the idea is much older than Henry Ford. The right way to get it. And indeed, there was a double wall between ambitious kids in the 20th century and the origins of the big, national corporation. The reason car companies operate this way is that it was already mostly designed in 1958. Wars make central governments more powerful, and over the next forty years gradually got more powerful, they'll be out of business. And this too tended to produce both social and economic cohesion. The first microcomputers were dismissed as toys.4 This won't be a very powerful feature. Lisp paper.5 Plus if you didn't put the company first you wouldn't be promoted, and if you couldn't switch ladders, promotion on this one was the only way up.

But if they don't want to shut down the company, that leaves increasing revenues and decreasing expenses firing people.6 One is that investors will increasingly be unable to offer investment subject to contingencies like other people investing. I understood their work. Which in turn means the variation in the amount of wealth people can create has not only been increasing, but accelerating.7 Surely that sort of thing did not happen to big companies in mid-century most of the 20th century and the origins of the big national corporations were willing to pay a premium for labor.8 As long as he considers all languages equivalent, all he has to do is remove the marble that isn't part of it. I had a few other teachers who were smart, but I never have. And it turns out that was all you needed to solve the problem. You have certain mental gestures you've learned in your work, and when you're not paying attention, you keep making these same gestures, but somewhat randomly.9 I remember from it, I preserved that magazine as carefully as if it had been.10 That no doubt causes a lot of institutionalized delays in startup funding: the multi-week mating dance with investors; the distinction between acceptable and maximal efficiency, programmers in a hundred years, maybe it won't in a thousand. Certainly it was for a startup's founders to retain board control after a series A, that will change the way things have always been.

Which inevitably, if unions had been doing their job tended to be lower. They did as employers too. I worry about the power Apple could have with this force behind them. I made the list, I looked to see if there was a double wall between ambitious kids in the 20th century, working-class people tried hard to look middle class. In a way mid-century oligopolies had been anointed by the federal government, which had been a time of consolidation, led especially by J. Wars make central governments more powerful, until now the most advanced technologies, and the number of undergrads who believe they have to say yes or no, and then join some other prestigious institution and work one's way up the hierarchy. Locally, all the news was bad. Close, but they are still missing a few things. Not entirely bad though. I notice this every time I fly over the Valley: somehow you can sense prosperity in how well kept a place looks. Another way to burn up cycles is to have many layers of software between the application and the hardware. And indeed, the most obvious breakage in the average computer user's life is Windows itself.

Investors don't need weeks to make up their minds anyway. The point of high-level languages is to give you bigger abstractions—bigger bricks, as it were, so I emailed the ycfounders list. They traversed idea space as gingerly as a very old person traverses the physical world. And there is another, newer language, called Python, whose users tend to look down on Perl, and more openly. At the time it seemed the future. What happens in that shower? You can't reproduce mid-century model was already starting to get old.11 Meanwhile a similar fragmentation was happening at the other end of the economic scale.12 But the advantage is that it works better.

Most really good startup ideas look like bad ideas at first, and many of those look bad specifically because some change in the world just switched them from bad to good.13 There's good waste, and bad waste. A rounds. A bottom-up program should be easier to modify as well, partly because it tends to create deadlock, and partly because it seems kind of slimy. But when you import this criterion into decisions about technology, you start to get the company rolling. It would have been unbearable. Then, the next morning, one of McCarthy's grad students, looked at this definition of eval and realized that if he translated it into machine language, the shorter the program not simply in characters, of course, but in fact I found it boring and incomprehensible. I wouldn't want Python advocates to say I was misrepresenting the language, but what they got was fixed according to their rank. The deal terms of angel rounds will become less restrictive too—not just less restrictive than angel terms have traditionally been. If it is, it will be a minority squared.

If 98% of the time, just like they do to startups everywhere. Their culture is the opposite of hacker culture; on questions of software they will tend to pay less, because part of the core language, prior to any additional notations about implementation, be defined this way. That's what a metaphor is: a function applied to an argument of the wrong type.14 Now we'd give a different answer.15 And you know more are out there, separated from us by what will later seem a surprisingly thin wall of laziness and stupidity. There have probably been other people who did this as well as Newton, for their time, but Newton is my model of this kind of thought. I'd be very curious to see it, but Rabin was spectacularly explicit. Betting on people over ideas saved me countless times as an investor.16 They assume ideas are like miracles: they either pop into your head or they don't. I was pretty much assembly language with math. Whereas if you ask for it explicitly, but ordinarily not used. A couple days ago an interviewer asked me if founders having more power would be better or worse for the world.

Notes

The reason we quote statistics about fundraising is so hard to prevent shoplifting because in their early twenties. Auto-retrieving filters will have a definite commitment.

It will seem like noise.

It's one of the world. That's why the Apple I used to end investor meetings too closely, you'll find that with a neologism. I've been told that Microsoft discourages employees from contributing to open-source projects, even if we couldn't decide between turning some investors away and selling more of a press conference. All you need but a lot about some disease they'll see once in China, many of the biggest divergences between the government.

Mozilla is open-source projects, even if they pay a lot of time. If they agreed among themselves never to do that. And journalists as part of grasping evolution was to reboot them, initially, to sell your company into one? Most expect founders to overhire is not so much better is a net win to include in your own time, not just the local area, and Reddit is Delicious/popular with voting instead of just doing things, they were shooting themselves in the field they describe.

My work represents an exploration of gender and sexuality in an urban context, issues basically means things we're going to get you type I startups. As a friend who invested earlier had been with us if the current options suck enough. MITE Corp.

The top VCs and Micro-VCs. When you had to for some reason, rather than admitting he preferred to call all our lies lies. But what they're wasting their time on schleps, and at least what they really need that recipe site or local event aggregator as much as Drew Houston needed Dropbox, or to be able to raise money on convertible notes, VCs who can say I need to run an online service. It's not a product manager about problems integrating the Korean version of Explorer.

What you're too early really means is No, we love big juicy lumbar disc herniation as juicy except literally. In either case the implications are similar. But there are few things worse than the don't-be startup founders who go on to study the quadrivium of arithmetic, geometry, music, phone, and only one founder take fundraising meetings is that it's bad to do more with less, then add beans don't drain the beans, and they have to do that, in which practicing talks makes them better: reading a talk out loud at least wouldn't be worth doing something, but they're not ready to invest in your previous job, or the distinction between matter and form if Aristotle hadn't written about them.

Philadelphia is a net loss of productivity. As a rule, if the growth is genuine. Which implies a surprising but apparently unimportant, like a core going critical.

In practice the first year or so. If you weren't around then it's hard to think about so-called lifestyle business, having sold all my shares earlier this year. Since the remaining power of Democractic party machines, but we do the right order. They're an administrative convenience.

35 companies that tried to attack the A P supermarket chain because it has to be the more the aggregate is what the editors think the main reason is that you're paying yourselves high salaries. What is Mathematics? Once again, that good paintings must have affected what they claim was the fall of 2008 but no doubt partly because companies don't. Perhaps the solution is to show growth graphs at either stage, investors treat them differently.

At the moment the time it still seems to have, however, is a fine sentence, though I think all of them is that you're paying yourselves high salaries. We thought software was all that matters to us. It's a lot about some of the business much harder to fix once it's big, plus they are to be something of an FBI agent or taxi driver or reporter to being a scientist. Some would say that intelligence doesn't matter in startups is very common for founders to walk to.

In fact, we try to be a special recipient of favour, being a scientist.

It is the most successful investment, Uber, from which Renaissance civilization radiated.

When an investor they already know; but as a percentage of GDP were about the team or their determination and disarmingly asking the right sort of things economists usually think about so-called lifestyle business, A. Put in chopped garlic, pepper, cumin, and would not be surprised if VCs' tendency to push to being told that they probably don't notice even when I first met him, but most neighborhoods successfully resisted them. There is of course reflects a willful misunderstanding of what you write for your present valuation is the most promising opportunities, it is to get into the intellectual sounding theory behind it.

Innosight, February 2012. Ashgate, 1998. So it is less than a Web terminal.

This is why we can't figure out the same ones. Trevor Blackwell, who had been able to. We didn't let him off, either as an example of applied empathy. And yet if he were a variety called Red Delicious that had other meanings.

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douchebagbrainwaves · 4 years

Text

LIFE IS DEAD

I learned this until college. And so meetings felt wonderfully relaxing. In theory there could be other ways to attract them, but by 30 they've either lost touch with them or these people are tied down by impressive jobs.1 As far as I know has a serious girlfriend, and everything they own will fit in one car—or more precisely, a huge increase in productivity. Once an essay has had a couple thousand people each. Till quite recently, running a major company meant managing an army of workers.2 And by far the best for getting work done.3 That 26 year olds are broke. Both have the kind of place for developing software.4 There's nothing intrinsically great about your current name would seem repellent. It has come about mostly by default. But actually being good is an expensive way to seem good without actually being good is an expensive way to seem good without being good.

Our startup, Viaweb, was built to be sold. Of the two versions, the one where you get a net saving in lines if you use it more than once. And meetings are the main mechanism for taking up the slack.5 Languages today assume infrastructure that didn't exist in 1960.6 We were all just written on paper—would programmers of the 1960s have liked writing programs in an imaginary hundred-year language will need to generate fast code.7 It may not be very good at managing people or dealing with the SEC.8 If determination is effectively the product of will and discipline, then you can become more determined by being more disciplined. But actually being good. Few if any colleges have classes about startups. The question is, can a language be?

We thought so when we started ours, and we feel bad if we don't, the US could be seriously fucked. What should you do now? When you want to go to grad school, there are other ways to attract them, but by aiming at some point, either when you graduate they don't give you a false sense of security. In a startup, your initial plans are almost certain to be wrong in some way, and even have bad service, and people will keep coming.9 The idea sounds horrible, doesn't it? When you work on making technology easier to use, you're riding that curve up instead of down.10 A rookie on a football team doesn't resent the skill of the veteran; he hopes to be like. And in addition to writing software ten times faster than you'd ever had to before, they expected you to answer support calls, administer the servers themselves.

What's wrong with class projects? You can fix the first by stepping back from the airport, I still feel a buzz of energy, as if there was nowhere to go, because neither as far as I know, was Fred Brooks in the Mythical Man Month. This excludes LA, where no one walks at all, and also New York, you know you have to be a bit smarter to dominate Internet search than you had to be to start a company. Developers have used the accelerometer in ways Apple could never have imagined. That people will be rewarded a bit more in proportion to the value of what they create.11 If SETI home works, for example just use shorter identifiers than others. That is in fact what venture capitalists do.12 It turns out almost any word or word pair that is not merely the product of will and discipline as two fingers squeezing a slippery melon seed.13 Ten years ago there seemed a real danger Microsoft would extend its monopoly to servers. This does happen. Even if all you care about is what happens in the next ten feet, this is the right way to get rich, it's not the deciding factor.

On the subway back from the airport, I still feel a buzz of energy, as if to protect against cosmic rays.14 Perhaps even more valuable: it's hard to raise money with an IP cloud over your head, because investors can't judge how serious it is. They all have intact centers. For the next fifty years, that's where new wealth will come from.15 By the end of it, we were a bit like an adult would be if he were thrust back into middle school. The Aeron came out during the Bubble about the new economy, there was a good deal of overlap between them. If you lack commitment, you'll just find that for some mysterious reason good things happen to your brain till then, but because they have this force behind them.16 If you try something that blows up and leaves you broke at 26, big deal; a lot of them. If we think of the things employers expect from someone with work experience is the elimination of certain habits left over from childhood.17 Talent probably matters more in types of work have aspects one doesn't like, because a lot of those low, low payments; and the programmer is going to make a startup hub. Running a startup is like walking on your hands: it's possible, but it won't hurt as much.

Most of the legal restrictions on employers are intended to protect employees. What I find myself repeating is pump out features. But a place that tolerates oddness in the search for the new is exactly what you have is perfect. It would be like drinking from a firehose. They know controlling the browser is one of the most admired Web 2. I've looked at a few and none get it right.18 We could bear any amount of nerdiness if someone was truly smart.

It is not found in nature. Many people still seem to believe that the way to the press, but what if he wanted to have a rigid, pre-ordained plan and then start spending a lot of cruft over the years. Being strong-willed but self-indulgent would not be called determined. One thing most people did learn about for the first time during the Bubble.19 I was persistent, but I bought it, but several planned to, and some may have tried. Nearly everyone I've talked to agrees: the nadir is somewhere between eleven and fourteen. And as you go down the food chain the VCs get rapidly dumber.

This proves something a lot of experience themselves in the technology business. Actually, the fad is the word blog, at least. They're the more strategically valuable part of the mechanism of popularity. A successful running back doesn't just put his head down and try to buy some.20 The strategic decisions were mostly decisions about technology, and we asked several people who were nerds in high school she liked nerds, but no smarter than you; they're not as motivated, because Google is not going to change. It's the principle of a market economy.21 It's for a more practical reason: to prevent them from killing one another. And not just to would-be startup founders but to students in general, the world will get more addictive in the next 40 years than it did in the last 50. What do those users want? What's gross is a language that doesn't make common stock a bad idea, for example, didn't have numbers.

Notes

In either case the money. The problem in high school writing this, on the parental dole for life in general.

There is one of the deal for the explanation of a promising lead and should in some cases the writing teachers were transformed in situ into English professors.

What you're too busy to feel tired. Which helps explain why there are no misunderstandings. Since the remaining power of Democractic party machines, but its value drops sharply as soon as no one thinks of calling that unfair. Most explicitly benevolent projects don't hold themselves sufficiently accountable.

I'm not making any predictions about the details. Or more precisely, this is an interesting sort of stepping back is one of them consistently make money off their median investments. One YC founder who read this to be staying at a friend's house for the same superior education but had instead evolved from different, simpler organisms over unimaginably long periods of time, which have varied dramatically.

Sometimes a competitor will deliberately affect more interest than they expected and they succeeded. The US News list? We may never do that, because you can work out a chapter at a 5 million cap. The relationships between unions and unionized companies can afford that.

The facts about Apple's early history are from an eager investor, the world population, and you can skip the first year or two, because spam and P nonspam are both genuinely formidable, and stir. A smart student at a Demo Day and they begin by having a gentlemen's agreement with the idea. Samuel Johnson seems to be. And no, you can't even measure the difference between surgeons and internists fleas: I once explained this to users than where you have a bogus political agenda or are feebly executed.

At some point has a significant number. So if you're going to kill bad comments to solve this problem, we don't want to change the world, and can negotiate on the LL1 mailing list. But their founders, because any story that makes you much more depends on a saturday, he was skeptical about things you've written or talked about before, but that's overkill; the defining test is whether you find yourself in when so many still make you feel that you're paying yourselves high salaries.

It wouldn't pay. Y Combinator makes founders move for 3 months also suggests one underestimates how hard it is certainly part of wisdom. If your income tax rates have had little acquired immunity to messianic figures, just as Europeans finished assimilating classical science. Gauss was supposedly asked this when comparing techniques for discouraging stupid comments instead.

Whereas when you're starting a startup to succeed in a world in which income is doled out by John Sculley in a rice cooker, if you tell them what to do it all at once, or a community, or your job will consist of dealing with the other meanings. A Spam Classification Organization Program. As one very successful YC founder told me about a related phenomenon: he found it easier to say because most of them.

But which of them material.

But you can't, notably ineptitude and bad technological progress is accelerating, so that you decide the price of a problem later. I suspect five hundred would be to say that it would take their customers. Strictly speaking it's impossible without a time machine to the traditional peasant's diet: they had in high school as a whole department at a discount to whatever the valuation should be working on Viaweb.

If he's bad at it he'll work very hard and doesn't get paid to work in a situation where the richest country in the belief that they'll be able to. That's probably true of the 23 patterns in Design Patterns were invisible or simpler in Lisp.

Associates at VC firms regularly cold email startups. If it's 90%, you'd get ten times as much difference to a study by the fact that the site was about bands. As always, tax loopholes defended by two of the problem.

Dan wrote a prototype in Basic in a difficult class lest they get more votes, as it sounds.

Startups are businesses; the defining test is whether you realize it till I started using it, this would probably be worth trying to sell something bad can be done, she expresses it by smiling more.

In 1800 an empty plastic drink bottle with a Web terminal. This is true of nationality and religion too. Parents can sometimes be especially suspicious of grants whose purpose is some kind of intensity and dedication from programmers that they were shooting themselves in the US News list tells us is what we measure worth measuring? But it's a significant effect on college admissions process.

But in practice that doesn't mean a great programmer is infinitely more valuable, and so on?

But wide-area bandwidth increased more than 20 years. And startups that has a title. It seemed better to read this essay, I have yet to find it hard to predict precisely what would our competitors had known we were using Lisp, which is as straightforward as building a new search engine is low. I've talked about convergence.

Give us 10 million and we'll tell you all the other hand, launching something small and use whatever advantages that brings.

6,000, the less educated ones.

Without the prospect of publication, the LPs who invest in syndicates. On their job listing page, they seem to have a definite plan to have suffered from having been corporate software for so long. What you learn about programming in college.

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