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justagalwhowrites · 10 months

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Lavender - Ch. 47

You, Joel and Ellie make your way back to Jackson. A continuation of Lavender Ch. 1-46 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Smut. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ only

Length: 3.5 K

“Baby, we can afford to stop in a few minutes,” Joel glanced down at your thigh. Seeing blood coming from you made his stomach churn.

“I’m fine,” you wound tape around the gauze. “We should get as far from Salt Lake City as we can while we can. There’s not much more I can do about this until we’re in Jackson, anyway…”

He nodded once and kept his eyes on the road as you tugged your jeans back up, wincing. He tried not to wince, too. He should have killed Marlene when he had the chance, should have snapped her neck right there in that room the second she told him the plan was to kill Ellie. You twisted to look at the girl you would both kill to protect, still unconscious in the back seat.

“Joel,” you said quietly, watching her for a moment before looking at him. “Joel, what are we going to tell her? How do we explain this?”

“We don’t,” he glanced your way. “We don’t tell her any of it.”

“Joel.”

“What are we supposed to say?” He propped his elbow against the window sill, leaning his head against his hand. “Do you think she’d accept this? Any of it? Think she wouldn’t hate you and me and herself?”

“We can’t just lie to her,” you kept glancing into the back seat, keeping your voice low. “She’ll find out, it’ll be worse when she does…”

“You really think she can handle it right now?” Joel looked at Ellie in the rearview mirror. Her face was calm, relaxed. “We have to protect her, Baby. I didn’t protect her before, not from… I can now. We can. She can’t take this. She can’t. Baby, please…”

You put your face in your hands for a moment and took a deep breath before looking at him again.

“What do you want to tell her?” You asked quietly.

“The hospital was attacked,” he said, staring straight ahead. He couldn’t bring himself to look at you. “The research didn’t line up with what you thought would work. The doctor was full of shit.”

He glanced at you quickly and looked back at the road.

“Not even a lie,” he said, a finger absently tracing his mustache. “Not really.”

You looked into the backseat again, at Ellie’s prone body.

“OK,” you nodded. “OK.”

The two of you rode in silence for a while, Joel glancing at you occasionally. You looked like you were in pain. He just wasn’t sure if it was the gunshot wound or what he’d done.

He didn’t regret it. He couldn’t regret it. If it saved Ellie or you, it was worth the cost. Any cost. He’d do it again in a heartbeat.

He just wasn’t sure you felt the same way.

“Do you think I did the wrong thing?” He asked after a while.

Joel felt your eyes on him. Deep and strong and full of all the things that made life worth living.

“No,” you said eventually. “I don’t. I… I don’t know that there was a better way to do it but I don’t think it was wrong. You had to save her, Joel. And… as much as I hate how many people had to die for it, I’m glad you did. She’s… She’s ours. She’s worth it. She’s worth everything.”

He reached out and put a hand on your uninjured knee, giving it a squeeze, and you put your hand over his. His hand stayed there until Ellie started stirring.

You twisted around to face the back, Joel watching in the rear view.

“Take it easy,” you said gently as she groaned and squinted against the light. “You’re OK, Kiddo. It’s just us, we’re in a car, you’re safe…”

“But we were there,” she propped herself up on her elbows looking toward the front seat. “We were with the Fireflies…”

“We were,” Joel said, his chest tight.

“So why aren’t we there now?” She frowned. “Where are we?”

“We’re headed back to Jackson,” you said, tone slow and easy. “We had to leave the facility…”

“Why?” She demanded, sitting up straighter. “What happened?”

Joel looked at you and you looked at him.

“I met their doctor after they started running tests on you,” you said, looking back to Ellie. “His plan… it wouldn’t work with what they could take from your blood. It just wasn’t what they thought it would be…”

“Oh,” she looked down and nodded slowly. Then she frowned. “Then why didn’t we stay? At least for a few days…”

“The hospital was attacked, Baby Girl,” Joel said, his grip on the steering wheel so tight that his knuckles were white. “We barely got you out alive…”

“Is everyone OK?” She asked. “You guys? Marlene?”

“Doc got hit,” Joel said. Ellie’s eyes went wide.

“I’m fine,” you said quickly. “It was just my leg, I’ll be fine…”

She sat all the way up quickly, leaning forward between the front seats to look at the bloodstained pant leg.

“Jesus,” she said before looking between the two of you. “Marlene?”

“I’m so sorry, Kiddo,” you said quietly. “But I don’t think she made it out.”

She nodded and sat back, wrapping her small arms around her waist and staring out the window. You looked at Joel for a long moment before you reached out and rested your hand on his arm, in the crook of his elbow. Just touching him, reminding him that you were right there with him, that you were in this together. He was grateful for it.

The drive was a quiet one. Ellie lay back down, saying she was tired but just staring at the ceiling. You changed your bandages. Joel kept an eye out for a place to siphon gas, the roads almost deserted this far out from civilization. But he found a place and you opened the passenger door, turning so you were facing out into the world as he filled up the gas can. When he was done, he came and stood in front of you for a moment, kissing your forehead and holding your shoulders gently. You reached up and wordlessly held his face in your hand, your index finger lightly tracing the scar at his temple.

“I love you,” you said quietly. “Always have, always will.”

His hands slid up your shoulders to your face, cradling you gently, tilting your head back to kiss you the way he wanted, the way he needed, the way that helped him remember why this shitty world was worth the trouble.

The three of you stopped for the night somewhere in Idaho, not much further left to drive but Joel wasn’t sure he had it in him to keep going that night. He wasn’t sure any of you did.

There was a small town nearby and he found Ellie some clothes and you some jeans that weren’t covered in blood before taking the SUV into the woods off the road. He folded the back seats of the car down and the three of you slept there, Joel holding onto you and you holding onto Ellie. He looped his arm through yours, brushing the hair that had escaped your braid back and just holding onto as much of you he could reach. He was sure he could hear Ellie sniffling in the dark.

Joel hated that she was hurting but he loved that she was alive to be able to hurt. He’d take her railing against him, hating him, wishing he was dead. He’d take all of it if it meant she lived. That was all that mattered. That was enough.

***

You still weren’t sure you’d made the right call. If you should have pushed Joel harder to tell her the truth. If you should have told her, anyway, and risked losing him over it.

You couldn’t tell if he really thought she couldn’t handle it or if he was doing what he thought would protect him from Ellie’s wrath. That girl had him wrapped around her fingers, you weren’t sure he could handle her hating him. But you also weren’t sure Ellie could handle knowing what Joel had done. What you had done.

You didn’t think you could handle it, in her place. The idea that anyone died for you still made your stomach turn. You’d killed people. Joel had killed for you. There were people gone from this planet today because you were still here and that was a feeling that sat with you in your marrow, crawling its way out from the very center of your being to rip and tear at any sense that you could be worth that much loss.

It seemed like you needed to earn the right to live after all of that. In a way, it always had. You’d been made an unwanted thing, born to be someone’s problem. Everything you did, it seemed, was to make up for that.

Ellie, you thought, felt much the same way. For all her sharpness and casual detachment, she’d been left behind so many times that she dug her nails into anything that made her feel like she was worthwhile. It was the main reason, you suspected, that she’d gotten attached to you in the first place. You’d paid attention to her when no one else did. You’d fed her interests, given her a safe place to spend her time, offered her a listening ear. Even if she didn’t like you much (though you thought she did) you were certain she would have gravitated toward you just for that alone.

To Ellie, the thing that made her worthwhile was her immunity. It was there in everything she did. In her drive to get west, in her millions of questions about what life was like before, in her need for reassurance that something better was possible and that she was a key part of it. Now, that was gone.

“Why don’t you sit up front with Joel today?” You asked as you changed your bandage out on your leg. It had stopped bleeding quite so much, at least. “I want to stretch out in back, get the princess treatment…”

“You mean the front seat isn’t princess treatment?” She raised her eyebrows at you. She was teasing you. That was a good sign. “News to me…”

“Take it while you can get it, Kiddo,” Joel said, putting the back seats back up. “Not sure when you’ll get this kind of chance again. Who knows the next time we’ll have a car and Doc’ll feel like sharin’…”

You rolled your eyes but he lifted you gingerly out of the back of the SUV and carried you to the back seat, setting you down with all the care in the world. It always surprised you, when he was quite that gentle. He was large and strong, it had to take concentration for him to be soft. It wasn’t his natural state of being, he wasn’t made for it. But you could live in the soft spaces he made in himself, burrow yourself in deep and stay as close to those parts of him as you possibly could.

“Good point,” Ellie said, climbing into the front seat. You leaned your back against the door behind Joel, stretching your legs out on the seat.

“You know,” Joel said as the three of you got underway. “Her and Sarah’d fight over shotgun…”

Your head whipped around so fast you felt it in your neck. He said her name. Casually, as a fond memory. Something not wrapped up in the tragedy of her loss but something about her to Ellie.

“Shotgun?” Ellie asked.

“Another word for sittin’ up front,” he said. “Doc usually got it as a rule but Sarah liked to make an argument for it when we’d all go out… She’d get her way when her argument was good enough.”

“Still think that she’d have made a hell of a lawyer,” you smiled a little. “She came up with some really good shit…”

You caught some of Joel’s smile in the rear view mirror, his eyes looking into it to see you.

“So how’d you two meet, anyway?” Ellie asked, sitting more sideways in her seat. “I know you did a bunch of fun shit like ride roller coasters and go to the space center but I don’t know how you guys became friends in the first place.”

“She was Sarah’s nanny,” Joel looked in the rearview mirror at you and you smiled a little at him. “She was in college, I was probably too old to be chasin’ a college girl…”

“One, no you weren’t,” you said. “And two, I chased you a whole lot more than you chased me.”

“But you were her boss or whatever?” She crinkled her nose. “Ew.”

You laughed.

“Good instincts, kiddo, but it wasn’t exactly a typical working relationship,” you said. “We were more like friends for a year before we got together.”

“And you did shit like go to museums and stuff,” she said.

“And all kinds of stuff that seemed really boring at the time but seems a lot more special now,” you said. “Doesn’t really matter what it is you do. It’s all about who you do it with.”

Joel had to ditch the car a few miles outside of Jackson, gas low and roads not really equipped for vehicle traffic.

“I can walk it,” you said, with more confidence than you really felt.

“Like hell you’re walkin’ it,” Joel said, incredulous. “You and Ellie stay put. I’ll be back soon with horses.”

You watched him go, the two of you perched on the back of the SUV, until he was out of sight and looked to Ellie.

“Rummy?” You asked, reaching around for your bag.

“Sure,” she shrugged.

“We’ll have to see what kind of board games there are in town when we get a little settled,” you said after she beat you at the first game and you were dealing for the second. “There are so many different kinds, I’m sure we can find something that we can reliably clobber Joel at…”

“Hey Doc?” Ellie asked, the usual force behind her words gone. You frowned and looked up at her. She wasn’t looking at you, instead down at the floor of the car, drumming her fingers on the threadbare carpet.

“What’s up, Gremlin?”

“What you and Joel said happened with the Fireflies…” she trailed off for a second before meeting your eyes, her gaze intense. “Was that true? All of it?”

You looked back at her, your heart aching for her. She looked so fragile, like one wrong move, one wrong word, would shatter her like spun glass.

“Yes,” you said, resisting the urge to look away. “I met with the doctor, they ran tests that didn’t turn out the way I thought they would, the hospital was attacked… I’m so sorry it didn’t work out the way you wanted it to, Baby Girl. We both are. I know you wanted the cure to happen but it was always something that might not work. The important thing is that we got you out of there before anything bad happened.”

She nodded slowly and sighed.

“I just…” she picked at the carpet. “Wanted to do something. Wanted my life to matter.”

“It does matter,” you leaned forward and gently held her face. “You matter. You matter so much, and your immunity doesn’t have a thing to do with it.”

She nodded and picked up her cards, hiding behind them a little as she planned her first move.

Joel returned with Tommy a few hours later and the four of you rode back to Jackson together.

Tommy, it seemed, understood that the three of you weren’t exactly wanting a welcoming committee. You rode straight to the house that was now yours. Maria had brought some easy food and left it in the kitchen, as well as a few changes of clothes for everyone. Joel insisted on carrying you up the stairs and helped you stay steady in the shower (earning you both an “ew” from Ellie.) His hands ranged over you, all gentleness and caring, cleaning you and keeping you standing as you tried to navigate bathing with a bullet wound. It sent sparks of heat through you, even though your leg hurt and you were exhausted from the nightmare the last few weeks had been. You kept your hands to yourself, not trusting yourself to not try something stupid on a slick shower floor even in your condition.

“We can get some paints,” you said once the three of you were cleaned up and Ellie picked her room. “I’ll do whatever you want but I was thinking the solar system? Or maybe a giraffe?”

“That’d be cool,” she smiled, a little half heartedly at you.

“Are you OK?” You asked, frowning a little. “You don’t have to sleep in here tonight if you don’t want, the bed over there is huge…”

“No,” she shook her head. “No, I like the room. I want to have my own room and actually use it, it’s just… I don’t know what I’m supposed to do now. There’s no more fucking FEDRA. I’m not a miracle cure. So now what?”

“You live your life,” you smiled a little at her. “That’s the best part.”

Joel joined you in bed after obsessively checking every door and window on the ground floor of the house to make sure everything was locked. The heat from the shower was still swirling in you, stretching out into your body like light filling empty space. He crawled into beside you and you reached for him, bringing him in close and kissing him softly.

“We made it here,” you said, trailing your fingers through his hair. “It’s over.”

“Mmm,” he hummed, burying his face in your neck, his lips brushing your throat.

“Wouldn’t be here without you,” you said as he tugged you closer.

“Wouldn’t be here without you, either, Baby,” he said, kissing up to your chin and over to your mouth. He pulled you tighter to him. “Not hurtin’ you am I?”

“Not hurting me,” you breathed against him.

“Promise I’ll be gentle,” he said, kissing over your throat again before tugging your shirt up and over your head. “Need you…”

“Need you, too,” you breathed, running your hands over his bare back.

He undressed you slowly, gently, like you were a delicate thing that was worth the trouble. Neither of you were patient enough to get you off before he started pressing into you. He held your face in his hand when he did, the delicious stretch of him making you want to close your eyes but you couldn’t stop looking at him.

Joel sank into your body slowly, until he was fully within you and all but collapsed on top of you. HIs arms caged you in, his breath hot on your skin as he peppered you kisses. The fire in you was blazing now, your body full of aching need and longing and having him this close without friction hurt you wanted it so badly.

“Need you to move,” you panted below him. “Please… I can’t…”

“Just… need a minute,” he breathed. “Need to be this close…”

You nodded against him and resisted the urge to rock your hips up into him, the beautiful agony making your body needy and tight.

When he started to move, it was in fractions of him. He kept his body flush with yours but slowly, firmly rocked his hips, pulling back every so slightly before pressing down and in, like he couldn’t bear to be any further away from you, like you were the thing keeping him tied to this planet.

Your orgasm built slowly, the feeling of him so deep inside you, his body pressed against your clit, making it so you felt it everywhere. Your whole being was taut and ready, primed for some kind of relief, desperate for it.

“Gettin’ close, Baby,” he whispered, voice ragged in the dark. “I need you…”

“You have me,” you said when he didn’t continue, your orgasm just inches away from you. “Please…’

He started fucking into you with more force, careful to not move your leg, his breaths stuttering. Your body clung to him, like it was waiting for his eventual release to let go yourself. When he came, he pressed himself deep and you shattered around him, pussy throbbing as he spilled into you.

He collapsed and gently guided your injured leg over his hip before rolling onto his side and taking you with him, his softening cock still inside you. His arms wrapped around you, enveloping you, clutching you close as you both caught your breath.

“Got everything with you and her,” he said after a minute, still clinging to you. “Don’t need anything else.”

A/N: Are we ready for some *drumroll* JACKSON CHAPTERS TO WIND THIS FIC DOWN?

I sure hope so because that's what it'll be!

We're getting so close to the end now. Thank you for being here at the end. It means the world.

Love you!!

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#fanfic #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #smut fic

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joelslastofus · 1 year

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[SUMMARY: Joel is assigned to drive you and two men to another destination. During the ride he notices one of the men bothering you through his rearview mirror and becomes defensive. He realizes you are used to men taking advantage of you and decides to help you the rest of the journey.]

Joel’s jaw tensed as he narrowed his eyes at him through the mirror. He was getting tired of hearing this man’s voice.

Marlene had set up for a man named Joel to drive you and two other men to another destination. You didn’t know any of these men but all you knew was that where you needed to get to was in the same direction where they all seemed to need to go. Over hearing conversation you heard Joel was only doing this favor for Marlene if it meant she would help him some how get to his brother.

Not looking forward to the ride you got in the car and sat by the window, you didn’t like the idea of riding alone with men but unfortunately you didn’t have another choice. Joel seemed to be a serious quiet man, he showed he wasn’t happy about doing this and so you let him be.

Sitting in the back you could hear the men beside you mumble something about your looks. Immediately you got uncomfortable and looked out the window turning away.

“So where you heading to all by your lonely self pretty lady?” One of the men asked beside you.

“Same way you are I suppose,” you responded sarcastically without turning to him.

“Oh, sassy. I love a sassy woman” the man scooted over close to you placing his arm above you. Joel was silent but he could hear clearly what was being said behind him.

“Do you mind?” You leaned closer to the door.

“What?” He looked down at you with a grin.

“Do you mind getting out of my space,” you spoke calmly yet your tone caught Joel’s attention. Looking up at the rear view mirror he had a perfect view of you with this man.

“Oh am I in your space, baby?” He leaned in.

“Hey-“ Joel’s voice making you both look up. He didn’t say much but he didn’t have to, a warning glare was enough to make the man beside you slightly back away. The other man beside him snickering mumbling under their breath.

About an hour had passed in the ride and you could feel the man beside you staring you down. “What?!” You finally snapped looking his way.

“Oh I’m sorry, beautiful I just never got to asking what your name was?”

“None of your concern” you muttered under your breath as you looked back out the window.

“Oh come on don’t be sucha mood killer” the two men laughed as Joel began to watch again, silently, his eyes back and fourth between you and the road.

“You’re a woman, I’m a man…we could help each other out-“

“I’d rather not” you snapped back in disgust.

“Why not? A pretty woman like yourself should have a man by her side” Joel’s jaw tensed as he narrowed his eyes at him through the mirror. He was getting tired of hearing this man’s voice. You scoffed and ignored the man’s words turning away. He didn’t say anything for a moment but simply stared down at you, his eyes roaming down to your chest and legs, Joel’s grip on the steering wheel tightening as he noticed how he was looking at you before you caught him.

”What the hell are you staring at?!”

“Whatever the hell I want, baby-“

“That’s enough” Joel’s voice made you both look ahead.

“Come on man, you know how it is now. How often is it we get to be alone with a sexy woman like her, help me out” the man winked at Joel.

“Sometimes us men just need to team up together-“ the man began to slide his finger over your thigh. You felt as if you were holding your breath watching, you didn’t trust anyone in that car.

“Stop it.” You whispered a bit nervous than you originally were as his hand move closer to your inner thigh before the car came to a sudden rough stop.

“Get out” Joel spoke bluntly staring directly at him in the mirror.

“You’re joking right? Marlene said-“

“I don’t give a shit what Marlene said” Joel responded.

“I’m not getting-“ before he could finish his sentence Joel turned pointing a gun directly in his face. You gasped sitting silently as the man slowly turned to you.

“Don’t look at her” Joel’s tone made the man quickly turn back to him.

“Get out” the two men slowly got out of the car, once they closed the door Joel put his gun down and sped off. In shock you sat in silence, Joel adjusting his side view mirror got a good look at you but didn’t say anything.

“Why’d you do that?” You finally asked a bit confused.

“They were bothering you weren’t they” he responded without looking your way. You knew why he did it, you just didn’t expect him to do so.

“What about Marlene?”

“Don’t worry about Marlene.” You raised a brow suspicious as to why he helped you, unfortunately men never really helped you without getting something in return.

You sighed biting your bottom lip.

“So I guess you can stop the car whenever you want, just tell me what you’d like” Joel furrowed his brows in confusion as he looked at you through the mirror.

“Tell you what I like?”

“Yeah, sex. Isn’t that why you got them out of the car?” Your question caused Joel to step hard on the breaks making you lean forward.

“You think I got them out so I could take their place?” He looked at you with a puzzled expression.

“I mean..that’s what most of Marlene’s men wanted” you responded with hesitance. The look in his eyes changing as he realized how you were taken advantage of this whole time and Marlene never knew. It became the normal for you if a man did something for you, it was expected to give in return.

“I’m not most of Marlene’s men” Joel had a look of sympathy before facing the road and continuing to head to your destination. The rest of the ride was silent, he continued to take peaks of you through the mirror, he wondered who you would be staying with.

“Hey, who’s waiting for you over there?” He asked curiously.

“No one, I was just asked to help with some things and I would be given a place to sleep.” He cleared his throat uncomfortably wondering what that meant for you. You were an attractive young woman with no one, he imagined how easy it was to be used when you didn’t have much.

“I know what you’re thinking but sometimes I just have to do what I have to do,” you spoke softly as he drove.

Maybe Marlene was aware.

Well he wasn’t ok with it.

“How about you keep heading my way-“

“What about what Marlene?” You asked looking at him through the mirror.

“I told you not to worry about her, I’ll handle that situation.” You didn’t respond and simply took a deep breath looking out the window. It was strange to be with a man who didn’t want anything in return but you allowed yourself to stay with him and see what would happen along this journey.

#pedro pascal #joel miller fanfiction #the last of us fanfiction #the last of us #joel miller x you #tlou fanfiction #joel miller fan fic #joel miller imagine

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blackswaneuroparedux · 11 months

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I never admitted to anybody during my entire military service that I had been an actor. I was terrified that I would be put in charge of Ensa [Entertainments' National Service Association]. Not even my closest friends knew I was an actor. I told them I was reading English at St Andrews University.

- Richard Todd

In his heyday in the 1950s and 1960s, Richard Todd was Britain’s leading matinee idol. If you love old movies, you’ll have seen Todd in one of his starring roles in “The Virgin Queen” opposite Bette Davis, “Stage Struck” with Marlene Dietrich, or “The Dam Busters” for which he won a Golden Globe Award. He was the tough little Scotsman in the wartime weepie “The Hasty Heart” and had audiences madly hunting for hankies.

Those were the days when Todd streaked across North American film screens as virtually every romantic hero from Rob Roy to Robin Hood. Ian Fleming chose him to play James Bond in “Dr. No” in 1962, but a schedule clash meant Sean Connery stepped into the role.

Little less known is the fact that he was also among the first British soldiers and the first Irishman to land in Normandy on D Day. More specifically, he participated in Operation Tonga during the D-Day landings in Normandy on 6 June 1944.

So it must have been surreal for Richard Todd the hearthrob actor to find himself playing Major John Howard in the epic movie ‘The Longest Day’ (1962) based on Cornelius Ryan’s book. Not least because he served with Howard and took part in the fighting at Pegasus Bridge that Major John Howard was tasked to secure on D Day.

Richard Todd was born in Dublin, Ireland, in 1919. His father was a medic in the British Army and, as his posting required, the early years of his life were spent in India. The family settled in Devon upon their return to England, and Richard was educated at Shrewsbury Public School, in Shropshire. The theatre was his first love, and he furthered his dramatic skills at the Italia Conti school, thereafter moving to Scotland where he helped to form the Dundee Repertory Theatre. When War was declared, Todd went to St. Andrew's University on the following day to volunteer. He was not a member of the University, but he not only convinced the selection unit that he was, but also added that he had been reading English there for six months, and that he had obtained a Cert A in his school cadet corps; a key point to being accepted as an officer. Despite success in passing off this invented career, Todd was to be disappointed by a lack of interest in him thereafter.

Becoming increasingly desperate to get into the War before it ended, he sent numerous letters to the War Office to press his case, which, in June 1940, was finally noticed.

Accepted by the King's Own Yorkshire Light Infantry, Todd went to Sandhurst to receive his officer training. He had a very lucky escape here when he was in a corridor on the second floor of a building when it was hit by a bomb, and he was blown into the garden outside by the blast. He got to his feet in the darkness and did not feel particularly affected by it, but an examination by torchlight revealed that his whole body was covered in blood from numerous small wounds.

A spell his hospital delayed his passing out from Sandhurst until early 1941. Celebrating in London, he narrowly avoided death again when he found his usual haunt, the Cafe de Paris, was too crowded to admit him and so he went elsewhere; it was hit by a bomb that same night and 84 people were killed.

His Battalion, the 2nd/4th Battalion The King's Own Yorkshire Light Infantry, was posted to XII Corps in defence of Kent, where a German invasion if it came would almost certainly land. Todd was given command of the infantry in the Dymchurch Redoubt, a fort of the Napoleonic era mounting two six-inch guns.

In the event of an invasion, this would certainly have been a primary target for the enemy, and those manning it were told that, with the main defensive line far to their rear, they would be left to fight to the end. General Montgomery commanded XII Corps at this time, and his characteristic emphasis on training and preparedness led to the formation of the first Battle Schools. Richard Todd attended one of these, and the experience allowed him to run his own School when, in December 1941, he was sent to Iceland with the 1st/4th King's Own Light Infantry to be trained in arctic and mountain warfare. Returning to England in September 1942, he eventually ended up in the 7th (Light Infantry) Parachute Battalion of the 6th Airborne Division. He was among troops of the 7th (Light Infantry) Parachute Battalion who, at 00:40 hours on 6 June 1944, landed behind the Normandy beaches in a cornfield, perilously close to tracer fire.

Todd scrambled into a wood and with 150 other paratroopers reached Pegasus and Ranville bridges, vital crossings to allow Allied forces to break out from the beachheads into Normandy. They had been seized by a glider force from the Ox and Bucks Light Infantry under the command of Major John Howard, who needed reinforcements to fend off ferocious German attacks.

In his memoirs, Caught in the Act, Todd would write of the carnage, “There was no cessation in the Germans' probing with patrols and counter-attacks, some led by tanks, and the regimental aid post was overrun in the early hours. The wounded being tended there were all killed where they lay. There was sporadic enemy mortar and artillery fire we could do nothing about. One shell landed in a hedge near me, killing a couple of our men.”

Todd would go on and see action at the Battle of the Bulge and push into the Rhine into Germany. After VE day, his division returned to the UK for a few weeks, then was sent on counter-insurgency operations in Palestine. During this posting he was seriously injured when his Jeep overturned, breaking both shoulders and receiving a concussion. He returned to the UK to be demobilised in 1946.

In 1962, Todd was given the part of Major John Howard in the film adaptation of Cornelius Ryan's book about the D-Day landings, ‘The Longest Day’ (1962). Due to the nature of cinema, it was impossible for the film to give a thorough reflection of the role of the 6th Airborne Division during the Invasion, and as such their activities were solely represented by a reconstruction of the capture of Bénouville Bridge by Howard's coup-de-main force. Although briefly mentioned, the role of the 7th Battalion in the defence of the western bridgehead was largely ignored, and so it appeared as if the defence of the bridge rested only on Howard's men.

Naturally, the omission of their fierce defence of Bénouville caused some resentment amongst veterans, not least because one of their own was championing this re-working of history. Todd, however, regarded ‘The Longest Day’ (1962) as a film rather than a documentary, and his part in it was simply that of an actor doing as he was told.

Richard Todd would never have guessed, that in 17 years since he was on Pegasus Bridge as a paratrooper that he would standing there again as an actor portraying Major John Howard who was given the order: 'Hold,… until relieved'. It had to be Richard Todd’s 'twilight-zone' moment.

The ‘relieve’ for Howard had to come from Lord Lovat and his troops, who had landed on SWORD Beach, and were legging it towards Pegasus Bridge.

Before the shooting of the scenes were started at Pegasus Bridge, the film producer of The Longest Day, Darryl F. Zanuck, had the real life Lord Lovat and Major John Howard brought over to meet the men who were going to portray them (Peter Lawford portrayed Lord Lovat). The men had not seen each other since 6 June 1944.

Photo (above). From L-R: Peter Lawford, Lord Lovat, Richard Todd, Major John Howard.

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stistilinskii · 1 year

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marauders driving headcanons from someone who can’t drive:

james potter would be the safest driver ever to the point where it gets on everyone’s nerves, he’d definitely get bumper stickers that say “baby on board” and then sirius would get him one that said “dog on board” just to be annoying. he probably gets emotional whenever another driver lets him cut in front of them.

remus lupin is an angry driver, he absolutely yells in welsh at whoever looks at him funny, probably calls everyone a cunt like no one is safe. (sirius finds it incredibly attractive bc like just imagine remus looking in the rear view mirror all angry). i could imagine him being an absolute hazard and like whenever james is in the car with him he has to hide his winces (james is 100% secretly a judgy driver).

lily evans is like a super organised, she is the person whose car is always clean with like the nice pine cone smelling things on the mirror and she always has snacks and a metal coffee cup. however, she definitely gets just as angry as remus when people are driving awfully, probably more frightening because she isn’t just threat and swears (i hate to say it but i feel like her and james are both on like those neighbour watch facebook groups and absolutely report speeding cars. )

sirius black does not and can not drive he is a princess passenger who 100% makes everyone listen to his music.

peter pettigrew is a nervous driver but incredibly good under pressure and can like parallel park like no one else.

regulus black also cannot yet drive however is secretly taking lessons that he would rather die then tell anyone about. he plans to one day just surprise everyone by pulling up in a car.

marlene mckinnon CAN drive and has a truck however only drives when she absolutely has to because she is the worst at navigating ever and will get so lost 98% of the time even with google maps. also gets so many tickets from accidentally going through red lights.

dorcas meadows drives marlene’s truck more than her, is amazing at driving however i can imagine her getting really impatient with bad drivers and just like constantly throwing her hands in the air to convey her anger at them.

mary macdonald is the scariest person ever to be in a car with because she constantly nervously breaks and takes her eyes off the road by accident because she can’t multitask if someone is talking to her. i feel like she’s the same as peter though, like she stays incredibly calm under pressure whereas marlene and james just shit themselves whenever cars drive too fast near them.

#sirius black #james potter #marauders #the marauders #peter pettigrew #remus lupin #lily evans #marlene mckinnon #jegulus #wolfstar #headcanons #harry potter #this definitely makes no sense but whatever #i’m tired and i’ve never driven a car so going off of the pure vibes that i get

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twistnet · 1 year

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chapter two — outskirts

⋯ SUMMARY ; the outskirts of the quarantine zone are trivial to navigate, and you are slowly starting to find out just how difficult this mission is about to become the longer you trek towards the capitol building

⋯ WARNINGS ; canon divergence, tw [ mentions of death, infected, guns, getting bit, blood ], some soft moments + mature language

“home sweet home...” tess utters, knocking rhythmically against the wooden door before working a series of locks open. tess’ route back to the warehouse located on the edge of the zone had taken a lot longer to get back to than anticipated. soldiers had practically swarmed the streets after the checkpoint explosion -- something she made sure to comment about at the first sight of the heavily armored platoons lining the streets. which had only earned her a slight glare from yourself before moving on.

the door swung open and tess was quick to announce herself, “hey. sorry it took so long. soldiers. fucking everywhere.”

“how’s marlene?” a voice -- ellie, questioned quickly with concern dripping into her tone before being offered a short smile from tess, “she’ll make it.” the answer was short, but seemed to do enough to stem the girl’s worries about her friend before turning toward joel with a wild smirk, “i saw the merchandise. it’s a lot. wanna do this?”

“yeah, but first...” he seemed to hesitate before continuing, “who’s this?” joel questions, frown lines deepening as his gaze falls where you stand just behind tess. your name rolls off her tongue easily as she waves her hand in your direction, “marlene sent her as insurance -- she’s taking over once we get to the capitol. they're expecting her to be there.”

“this was not what we agreed to! smuggling two girls outta of the zone? is marlene out of her mind?!” joel’s quick spout of anger is quickly diminished by tess’ heated glare, however, the anger is still evident on his features, “don’t you think it’s a bit strange that they're having us do their smuggling?”

“marlene wanted to do it herself. we weren’t their first choice, or the second for that matter. but it’s apparent she trusts this girl to make sure things run smoothly.” tess counters, shoulders shrugging slightly as she nods over towards you with a light smile, “besides, from what i hear, it’s not her first time out of the zone.”

“well, let’s just hope someone’s around to pay us.” joel grunts, following the group of girls into the other room. he brings up the rear, making sure each one of them makes it through the cutout in the wall before stepping over to the generator powering the lift.

“who’s waiting for us at the drop off?” he questions after the lift lowers the group down to the subfloor of the old apartment building -- one of the few unblocked entrances into the zone left untouched by fedra goons. “she said there’s some fireflies that have traveled all the way from another city. girl must be important.”

joel nods, turning his gaze towards you with a raised brow, “anything you want to add before we get started?”

you look up from the floor, arms crossing over your chest as you shake your head, “i probably know just as much as you do.” and for the most part, it was the truth. you, honest to god, had no clue why marlene wanted ellie escorted out of the zone. no reasoning was ever given and you definitely wasn’t going to ask. as for what you did know, it simply came down to knowing who exactly they were meeting at the capitol as it wasn’t too strange that a squad from another city had traveled in for the meet up, “great.”

once the lift comes to a halt, you step off the platform and follows after tess, lingering behind her and ellie as she takes a few looks around -- not at all familiar with this way out of the zone.

“how long is this all gonna take?” comes ellie’s question, her eyes glancing between the three other members of the group before tess shrugs, “if everything goes as planned, we should get you both to them in a few hours.” the answer seems to satisfy the girl again and the four make their way towards a ladder that leads to the ground above, “ellie, once we get out there, i need you to follow our lead and stay close.”

joel is the first up the ladder, hand pressing against the wooden panel that covers the entrance. he spares a quick glance around before climbing up and through. you are next, quickly climbing up the ladder and taking up an outlook position as the last two of the group join.

“this rain ain’t gonna do us any good.” joel comments, hand raising to shield his eyes from the onslaught of rain coming down around the city. it had been some time since you had been outside the walls, with your last run to an outpost just outside of boston having been almost four months ago and it seemed the travel times outside the walls were getting further apart as tensions continued to raise between the fireflies and fedra.

“holy shit... i’m actually outside.” ellie smiles, briefly locking eyes with you -- receiving a soft smile in return before being ushered forward, leaving you to bring up the rear alongside tess. you followed after joel, down and through what looked to have been some old sewage lines, all rapidly filling with water from the rain pouring down from above. this was definitely going to make the journey only slightly more miserable with the current given conditions.

you continued after joel and ellie, following them both up the length of an old semi trailer, only to curse a few seconds later when a fedra soldier pops out from nowhere and butts joel with the end of her rifle before lining the barrel up with the rest of the group, “don’t do anything stupid.”

heavy steps sound from behind, another fedra soldier with his gun drawn and pointed at tess’ back, “move.” he commands, ushering the girls out of the trailer and onto solid ground.

he gestures pointedly with his gun, “turn around. on your knees.” you drop to your knees beside tess, hands already raising above your head with the hopes the medallion of your necklace isn’t visible anywhere -- knowing damn well that the second either of the soldiers see, it’s an instant bullet to the head.

“you scan them, i’ll call it in.” the female soldier orders, stepping just a few paces away to talk into her radio as her partner steps forward with a scanner, “this is ramirez at sector twelve. requesting pick up for four stragglers.”

the male soldier slowly goes down the line, pressing the device against the back of each person's neck and only moving on when it comes back clear of infection. however, as he gets down to ellie, you quickly notice the girl grow antsy -- muttering something under her breath before she whips around and drives her knife into the calf of the soldier behind her.

you scramble, gun already in your hands and making the shot at the female soldier behind you and tess before turning to find joel apprehending the other with a single blow to the head.

your blood runs cold as panic slowly begins to set in -- this wasn’t how things were supposed to go. shooting soldiers and making a mess on the outside wall wasn’t how things were supposed to go. but your best guess is that this had to happen, otherwise they’d be carted back inside the walls.

your gaze turns toward ellie, who’s braced herself up against an old box as she slowly begins to panic herself, “oh fuck... fuck! i thought we were just gonna hold them up or something.” both tess and joel look about ready to rip into the younger girl when tess’ gaze drops to the scanner that lay at her feet.

“oh shit.” she mutters looking down at the reading, before tossing it over to joel, “look at this.” he catches the device effortlessly, eyes widening as he too reads over the reading before anger flashes over his face.

“jesus christ. marlene set us up?” he questions, almost distressed, tess only able to offer a shrug of her shoulders as she attempts to comprehend the turn of events. “why the hell are we smuggling an infected girl?”

your gaze drops to ellie, before snatching the device from joel’s hands to read it for yourself. brows furrowing before shaking the device -- hoping to some higher power that this thing was wrong. yet, the scan doesn’t change in the slightest.

“did you know about this?” tess questions you quietly with the briefest twinge of anger already beginning to lace her tone. though it disappears the second you shake your head, shoulders sagging as you turn to face away from the conversation. this whole trip was slowly starting to not make any sense and doubt was slowly starting to fill in the pit of your gut.

“i’m not infected!” ellie yells, hands held out in front of her as joel scoffs at her, “no? so this is lying?” he states, pointing towards the device in your hands with an angered expression.

“i can explain!” she states, pleading for the rest of the group to listen as tess and joel slowly start to crowd around her. “you better explain fast.” tess growls, gun already in her hand as she takes a step toward ellie in a menacing fashion.

“look at this!” her hand pushing the sleeve of her shirt up her arm to show off the healed over bite mark on her forearm. joel scoffs again, “i don’t care how you got infected...”

“it’s three weeks old...” ellie states, looking between the two in front of her, before tess quickly cuts her off with the shake of her head, “no. everyone turns within two days. so you stop bullshiting.”

“it’s three weeks. i swear. why would she set you up?” ellie pleads again with the group, knowing that this could very well end badly if they chose to leave her here. sure, she knows tess and joel would disappear without another word, but you? she wasn’t sure. you had been assigned to make sure she got to the capitol by marlene -- you wouldn’t abandon the orders you are given... right?

“i ain’t buying it.” joel sighs, turning away from the girl before spotting the humvee of fedra reinforcements approaching their location.“oh shit... tess. run.”

you jut forward, grasping ellie by the upper arm before pulling her along after the two smugglers. the group traverses through some of the old tunnels and sewage pipes -- wanting to avoid running into any and all fedra soldier now that they know two of their own were killed.

alarms and lights lit up the area around them, making avoiding the mass of fedra soldiers all that more difficult, “there’s so many of them out here. how are we going to get around them?” ellie whispers from your side, shouldering herself up against the broken piece of concrete as lights flooded the area below in search of the four of you.

“they ain’t spotted us yet -- quick, over this way.” joel states, waving for the rest of you to follow after him. it takes a few minutes to navigate the old sewers, and there are a few times where you feel yourself holding your breath as you wait to see if the fedra soldier had caught any of your movements, only to move on and call out to their team.

you slide into an area, pausing abruptly when humvee’s pass over a large grate, before joel ushers you into an area where it seems you all could get a grasp on what was going on, “alright... they're gone.”

“okay, what was the plan? let’s say that we deliver you to the fireflies, what then?” tess questions, looking between you and ellie as the latter settles to the ground under her. you can only shrug, only knowing to get ellie to the capitol -- you’re next orders would come from the team lead.

ellie sighed, “marlene... she said that they have their own little quarantine zone. with doctors there; still trying to find a cure.”

joel huffs out a disbelieving laugh while shaking his head, “yeah, we’ve heard that before, huh, tess?” there’s a slight glare sent his way before tess motions for ellie to continue with a lopsided smile, “and that... whatever happened to me is the key to finding a vaccine.”

“oh jesus.” joel curses, huffing out a laugh as ellie stares at him disbelief, “it’s what she said.” and once again, it seemed her words had fallen on deaf ears as joel shakes his head and all but waves her off, “oh, i’m sure she did.”

“hey! fuck you, man! i didn’t ask for this!” ellie yells, quickly standing from her seated position and walking a few paces to get in his face, only to be dragged back by your hand at her bicep with a swift shake of the head. she seemed to deflate at the action and muttered something under her breath as joel seemed to continue.

“tess, what the hell are we doing here?” he questions, now looking over at his partner with the hope that she wasn't buying into what was being said. however, the hopeful look in her eyes give the exact opposite response as she shrugged, “what if it’s true?”

“i can't....” joel scoffs in disbelief, shaking his head as tess takes another step towards him, “what if it’s true, joel? we’ve come this far, let’s just finish it.”

“do i need to remind you what is out there?” he growls out, making a point gesture as tess’ face seems to twist up in slight upset, “oh, i get it.” she hisses, brushing past her partner. leaving both you and ellie to follow right after her. and after a few paces, joel dutifully joins at the back.

“this way! if we cut through downtown, we can make it to the capitol by sunrise.” tess calls over her shoulder, pointing towards the highway ninety sign. the roads leading towards downtown look about the same as the wasteland closer to the quarantine zone.

“holy moly! i guess this is what these buildings look like up close. they're so damn tall.” ellie mutters, looking up and around at the leaning buildings before turning towards tess with a curious gaze, “so... what happened here?”

“they bombed the hell out of the surrounding areas close to the quarantine zones. hoping to take out as much of the infected as possible. it worked.” tess answered, earning a laugh from joel as you all continued down between the dilapidated buildings.

a loud crack of thunder seemed to stir up some of the infected, the noises seemed to scare ellie, who jumped almost a foot in the air and quickly cozied up to your side, “ah, what the hell was that?”

“tess, you hear that?” joel asked from behind, and tess nodded, “yeah, sounded pretty far away though.” the only tough part about trying to figure out where those sounds came from was that it could have been from anywhere. which made this situation all the more troubling.

“are we safe?” ellie questions, looking over at tess as she asks this, knowing that she would be upfront and honest with her, “for now... come on.” you continue to follow her up a slope, that later banks off and then drops over the edge, “damn, that's quite a drop.”

“there’s the capitol building over there.” joel points off into the distance, with the crest of the capitol just over the tilted towers. ellie’s shoulders seem to sag as she observes just how far off the end goal seems to be.

“yeah, we need to get around this mess...” tess states, shaking her head at the sad state of the outside area before moving back and away from the edge she’s standing on.

“this is the downtown area?” ellie questions, looking up at what she could only assume to be an old office building -- just like the ones she’s seen in the textbooks from the military school. tess nods softly, “was. now it’s just a giant wasteland.”

the path leads up to the courtyard, a part of the old building already starting to give away. with the windows and doors already open giving easy access to the lower floors of the building. joel is the first to enter, climbing up and into the building before cursing loudly, “hey, tess!”

tess quickly rushes up the rest of the way, coming to stop at joel’s side before shaking her head at the sight of the freshly mailed fedra officer leaning up against the wall, “he’s been ripped apart. body’s pretty fresh.” this body would only further complicate things -- it meant the building they are in had infected roaming around it’s halls, and that it was going to be a task and a half to navigate through.

“is that bad?” ellie asks from your side, looking over the body with a slight grimace as tess and joel share a look, “yeah, it might be. let’s not stick around.”

at her command, everyone began moving up the stairs, already wanting to put this building behind them until joel stops again, “ah! another one... shit!” with a shake of his head, he kneels down next to the body, pulling the small orders paper from his grasp and reading it over, “looks like these guys died waiting for backup.”

so, it meant whatever had killed them was still lingering around in the building. and it now meant you were all going to have to deal with it when the time came. the thing with infected was they liked to hide and aside from the obvious noise they tended to make, most of their attacks were made using the cover of darkness. and that only complicated things more.

sighing heavily, you continued up the flight of stairs, keeping watch for anything that moved or made noise. you slowly continued to crepe through the building, mainly climbing the stairs until you could find a room that took you down the length of the building. the first room like this you came across was on the fifth level, yet, had a bit of an obstacle keeping all of you from continuing further.

“god dammit! clicker...” joel curses, looking over the clicker attached to the wall and doorframe. tendrils spreading from its form and crawling up the walls around it. “jeez... what’s wrong with its face?”

“that’s what years of infection with do to you.” tess explains, gesturing wildly at the face with a displeased look. to most people’s knowledge, there were still some things roaming around that had gotten infected twenty years ago -- as to what state they were in at the time, no one really knows, but to get to this point, you’d had to be infected for at least a few years.

“so what, are they blind?” ellie asks, watching intently as joel attempts to force the door open. having to break the crusted growths that had attached themselves along the wall. a few solid hits of his shoulder against the door managed to pop it open and he ushered you all through.

“sort of, they see using sound.” tess states, as ellie perks up at the piece of information, “like bats?” to which tess nods, “like bats. if you hear one clicking, you need to hide. it means it’s right behind you.”

the next room you move into is oddly steep, and coupled with a violent shake of the building as you almost slipping back down towards the windows behind you, “whole building seems like it’s getting ready to fall apart. watch your head.” joel calls over his shoulder and you manage to steady yourself enough as the next shake takes place.

“totally cool... everything is totally cool.” ellie mutters to herself, sticking close to you and tess as the building continues to shake around you. once it settles, a look is shared among the group -- silent confirmations of safety as joel and tess move forward.

the next door is similar to the other, only this time it takes both joel and tess to push the door open -- watching with confusion as a large metal desk gets pushed away from the door before falling off the edge.

“joel!” tess yells in warning seconds before joel gets tackled by a clicker. you instinctively usher ellie behind you, hand already braced against the handle of your gun as tess shoots forward, kicking the clicker off joel and stepping down on the center of its chest before shooting it twice in the head.

“you alright?” ellie calls from over your shoulder, eyes wide with worry as joel quickly brushes her off, “it’s nothing.”

“lets search for supplies.” tess calls, before moving into the adjacent room and searching along the rows of office desks for anything useful. ellie follows in behind her, “shit! that was intense!”

“you said it.” tess mutters, shaking her head at just how close of a call that had been. you enter into the small office area, following tess’ suggestion to try and find some supplies. and you manage to find a few things, and combined with the stuff you had in your backpack, was enough to make a med kit. to which you turn towards joel, holding the pack out to him with a small smile.

“thanks.” he states quietly, wrapping the gaze around the length of his forearm before moving on and behind tess and ellie -- who have moved onto the next area.

it’s another set of stairs, however, it seems that you’ll have to scale a wall much taller than the ones previous. joel drops down, bracing himself against the wall before waving for tess. he lifts her up, making sure she’s up and over before waving for ellie to go next. once she’s up, you’re next and once your foot is placed in the brace of his hands, he lifts you up to grasp tess’ hand to pull you up the rest of the way.

“come on big guy.” tess utters down at her partner, causing you to chuckle lightly at the seemingly sweet words she’s spoken his way. joel jumps, grabbing her outstretched hand and the two of you pull him up and onto the next level.

you watch joel open his mouth, possibly getting ready to point out the direction the rest of you need to continue in, when clicks sound from the next room. “clickers?!” ellie screeches, before quickly being quieted by tess, who pulls the girl by her arm. joel ushers you in front of him, shouldering you behind a large desk right behind ellie and tess just as the first clicker comes bounding through the door.

you duck further when the clicker hovers just on the other side of the desk, the rhythmic clicks searching for any sign of life that it had followed in. when it steps back, walking towards the back part of the room, you watch tess reach down to her side, silently picking up a discarded bottle, before chucking it over the desk and letting it crash against the floor.

the clicker screeches, walking towards where the bottle had landed, and using the distraction to your advantage, tess waves you all to follow her down the length of desks and around the corner.

another bottle goes flying -- this time away from the blocked doorway tess quietly points out to all of you, and the clicker goes running towards the sound as before. once over and safe on the other side, your shoulders sag in relief, “you two alright?” tess questions after a second, looking between the two of you for any signs of distress.

“other than shitting my pants? i’m fine.” ellie jokes, earning a soft chuckle from you as you nod, signaling that you are fine and ready to move forward. tess smiles, “alright. lets go.”

“the stairwell’s blocked. should we go back up?” ellie obversely looks down at the pile of desks and chairs that block the way down to the lower levels. you step forward, looking over the railing and shrugging your shoulders, “we could go over...”

joel does just that, and with a bit of struggle, manages to pull the large filing cabinet out from under the crushed stairwell. allowing enough space for everyone to slide through to the other side, “there you go, ladies.”

tess slides over the railing first, followed by ellie and then by yourself. it’s an odd obstacle and your aren’t surprised when you manage to catch the toe of your boot on a stray piece of metal. a hand grasps the handle of your backpack, preventing you from falling flat on your face before pulling you upright, “thanks.” you mutter as joel comes around you, “don’t worry about it.”

then you catch tess climbing over the railing onto some scaffolding -- something you definitely didn’t trust with the way it groaned under the new weight being placed on it after all those years, “ah! this is crazy...” ellie states, looking over at tess as if she was crazy.

“just don’t look down.” tess replies easily, already moving off the first platform and onto the next. ellie shakes her head, before reluctantly climbing over the railing and wincing when it groans underneath her, “are you serious?”

ellie’s moments are slow, and almost calculated as she follows after tess. it’s evident this isn’t something she had seen herself doing when marlene had dropped her off to tess and joel earlier that day, and she was hoping that this was going to be the last daring thing she had to do before getting to the capitol building.

you climbed over once ellie made it to the other platform, hating how the rain managed to make the metal slippery and only that much more difficult to navigate. however, you were quicker to get across the platforms, rushing by tess and ellie as they waited for you and joel to enter in behind them.

screams echo from the next section of the building has you all stopping in your tracks as tess looks back at joel, “runners.”

“i’ll go check it out. stay with the girls.” joel orders, before dropping down to the next level. you slowly watch as joel quietly takes out the dozen or so runners throughout the lower complex. and the three of you only follow down to the same level once joel gives the all clear.

getting out and onto the street made you sigh in relief, and you’re almost happy to see the ground once more after spending those horrible few hours in that office building.

the rest of you follow joel over towards a shutter door, waiting patiently as he pulls on the chain to lift the door up for the rest of you to get through. until tess drops a hand to his shoulder with a concerned expression, “what? i don’t hear anything...” until something perks at her ears and she whips back around to joel, “double time it.”

“they're coming!” ellie yells from behind you, and you quickly shove her towards the gate, sliding under the metal door and securing her away as tess and joel barely make it through as the runners butt up against the gate.

“there’s something on your foot.” ellie points out, and you look down, finding a hand still gripped on joel’s boot -- something he’s quick to shake away before continuing further into the building.

walking and climbing through the shipping area, you’re able to deduct that the group ended up in a museum of sorts. entirely based on the old vases and some of the overturned exhibits, “this would have been so cool to see before the world went to shit. i always liked museums -- never been to one but all my books made them seem cool.” you state looking over everything. there’s a slight noise of agreement from joel, who quickly exits the area and moves further through the building as ellie and tess follow behind him.

the next room seems to have collapsed, and joel steadies himself under a few of the planks, lifting them before urging everyone through. however, his grasp and the rest of the ceiling slips down before you’re able to get through, trapping you and joel together on one side.

“joel!” tess calls from the other side, concern dripping into her voice as you move to sit ip, “we’re alright! we’ll make our way around -- “ his sentence overlapped with screeches of clickers running towards the sound. ellie and tess disappear from view and joel helps you back to your feet before ushering for you to follow him.

the both of you quietly sneak through the old building, not knowing where the infected exactly were, meaning you’d have to be quiet to avoid getting swarmed by runners and possibly clickers.

the first door you entered, runners stood around the different displays, scratching at their eyes as the infection coursed through them, “take them out quietly?” you whisper, earning a nod before you move through the room. slowly but quickly taking out each infected person by driving your knife through the bottom of their jaw or cheek.

eventually the two of you were able to clear the room, and joel whistled slightly from beside you, “that was... impressive.” joel mutters, giving you a slight nod just as he passes you up the stairs.

“i told you at the beginning i wasn’t going to slow anyone down.” you state, shooting him a slight smile before pausing as a runner rammed itself up against a blocked door. its continuous action told you that tess and ellie were just on the other side.

joel quickly took care of the runner, before opening the door. you called tess’ name as you watched her struggle for a short time with the runner, before breaking the wood plank against it’s head and knocking him to the ground.

“are you alright?” you question as you cross the room, waiting for the older woman to answer before ellie’s voice cuts through from the other room, “guys!”

the three of you went running, and you took out the runner grasping ellie before pulling her behind you as more runners came into the room. the both of you backed away, your gun raised and ready to take down any runner that came your way as tess and joel worked around the room with their own set of infected.

a runner came your way, and you pulled the trigger, blood spattering as the bullet struck its face and the runner went down. ellie’s hands twisted into the back of your shirt, keeping herself practically pressed against you until joel called out to see how everyone was.

her grasp dropped and she was quick to put a little bit of distance between the two of you. you didn’t mind -- you had come to know that people did odd and often stupid things when in fear.

joel guided everyone towards an open window -- ushering everyone out and onto the rooftop. you stepped out onto the rooftop, smiling as the dark night sky slowly turned into pale pinks and blues as the sun began to rise.

from your side, joel picked up a long wooden plank. setting it to go across to the next building over. “okay, now watch your step going over as it...” his words trialing off as ellie scoffs at him before walking across the wooden plank with ease. he stares after her in disbelief before motioning for you to go, and you scale along the board right behind ellie before coming to rest at her side.

joel is the next to come across, coming to stop right next to the both of you before gesturing in front of him, “is that everything you hoped for?”

“juries still out... but man, you can’t deny that view.” ellie smiles, staring down at the sunrise cresting just over the tip of the capitol building. an amazingly beautiful sight.

“it gets better once you get away from the city. there aren't any buildings and everything is... quiet. it’s nice.” you mutter, smiling softly as ellie’s eyes seem to widen at the information. and you wonder for a second if she’s gonna get to experience something like that.

“alright. lets keep going.” tess states, brushing past you all. you instantly pick up on her tone, sparing joel a questioning look as he only shrugs his shoulders before tess turns on her heel, “hey! let’s pick it up.”

you quickly cross the roof, following down the ladder right behind ellie, leaving tess and joel to linger on the roof, “hey, we're almost done. let’s stay focused.”

it wasn’t much longer of scaling the rooftops that the group of you made it to the outskirts of the capitol building, “it’s right around this corner. let’s go.” tess calls, already moving down towards the stairs and down them.

“keep moving, kid.” joel pushes ellie forward, and you can tell that she’s starting to get a little nervous with this trip coming to an end. everyone seems to be on edge, and ready for this to all be done -- not that you could blame them. the past few hours had been nothing but stressful and you were ready to take a break yourself.

“look at this.” joel calls from behind you, waving a note in his grasp. apparently he had turned a corner after seeing someone bloodied and huddled up into a corner and you felt your stomach twist seeing the tattoo on his upper arm, “there’s a firefly logo on his arm. what if we get there and they’re all dead?”

“they won’t be.” tess promises, forcing ellie to ask, “how do you know?”

there wasn’t a way to know, but there was a bit of an uneasy feeling already starting to settle in the pit of your stomach, but you couldn't think about something like that. not when you were all so close, “i just do.... fuck, look its gonna be fine.”

after helping everyone up and over the locked gate, joel jumps down from the wood planks running along the top of the gate, turning just enough to watch as the three of you jump down behind him, “alright... home stretch, tess!” with a slight roll of your shoulders, your gaze is drawn up towards the large marble building -- while covered in plant life and rusted to hell from the heavy rains that ran through the area, it still stood proud and tall. still a symbol of the life that had been before.

“um, just so it’s out there... i can’t swim.” ellie calls from behind you, eyeing the water suspiciously before tess motions towards the side of the road closest to the capitol gates, “it looks shallow on the right side, just follow me.” you close in behind her, part of you ready to reach out and grab her from the water should she slip further in -- thankful she’s at least wearing her backpack.

“i’m glad marlene hired you guys...” ellie says after a moment, looking between tess and joel, “what do you mean?” tess questions, looking back over her shoulder at the younger girl with a raised brow.

“i know you guys are getting paid for this... and she’s only here to oversee the trade... i’m trying to say thanks.” the poor thanks earns a soft chuckle from you as you follow tess up the steps of the capitol building, “yeah, sure. no problem.”

joel slides to the front of the group, pushing the doors open with brief hesitation before his shoulders drop, “no!” tess calls from behind, surging forward through the group, “no, no, no!” she shouts dropping next to one of the bloodied bodies of the team you were supposed to meet up with.

you move around the group, looking over the bodies in search of a radio -- hopefully allowing you to radio in and let someone know what had happened. that everything had just failed. but, you curse under your breath as nothing of the sort comes up and you realize that this group was a splinter of another, given that there were only five fireflies laid throughout the floor.

“what happens now?” ellie questions, looking between the three of you now. you slowly stand, walking back towards her with a shake of your head -- you truly didn’t know what to do now.

“what are you doin tess?” joel questions his partner, watching as she digs around the man’s vest, “maybe they had a map. or something to tell us where they were going.” she explains, slowly growing exasperated as nothing starts to come up.

“how far are we going to take this?” joel questions again, frustration growing across his features before tess explodes, “as far as we need to go!”

then, she’s turning towards the two of you, hope slowly flooding her eyes as she looks between you and ellie, “where was this lab of theirs?”

ellie shrugs, “she never said. only mentioned that it was someplace out west.” tess’ eyes glance towards you, “you?”

“i only heard rumors. there was talk about leaving the zone... going where, i’m not sure.” you sigh, arms swinging loosely at your side, “but again, it was all rumors. everything was kept pretty tight lipped.”

you could see the way tess deflated at your words, shoulders sagging as a look of anguish crossed over her features, before twinges of panic started to set in. you take note of how her hands begin to shake slightly, and a part of you wonders why she’s so suddenly dead set on making this work now -- when she hadn’t seemed to care too much about it in the beginning.

“what are we doing here? this is not us...” joel states, eyeing his partner curiously as tess scoffs and shakes her head, “what do you know about us? about me?”

“i know that you are smarter than this.” he growls, pointing towards the decaying body laying at their feet. it’s surprising to see tears slowly build in tess’ eyes, something she’s quick to will down before biting right back at joel, “really? guess what, we're shitty people joel, we’ve been that way for a long time.”

“no, we are survivors.” he reiterates before getting cut off by tess, “this is our chance!” she pleads with him, voice raising just enough that it seems to make joel snap as his face twists in anger, “it is over tess! now we tried, let’s just go home.”

tess’ bottom lip trembles slightly before steeling her nerves and shaking her head, “i’m not... i’m not going anywhere. this is my last stop.”

“what?” joel questions, confusion overtaking his features as tess shrugs her shoulders, “our luck had to run out sooner or later...”

“what are you going on about - “ joel reaches forward, getting ready to comfort his partner until tess jerks herself out of his reach and screeches, “no! don’t touch me!”

“holy shit.... she’s infected.” ellie mutters under her breath, eyes locked completely on tess -- who goes quiet and seems to almost shy away the second the words are out in the open. then the realization dawns on you and your jaw goes slack in shock.

a part of you starts to rack your brain. trying to come up with a scenario and remember when tess would and could have gotten bit. then, you remember how you and joel had burst into a room to find tess fighting off that runner.

“when we got separated in the museum, and we found you later with that runner... that’s when it happened, didn’t it?” the words tumble from your mouth before you can even stop them, but tess’ nod confirms everything.

“let me see...” joel goads, eyes still on tess, “show it to me.”

at his words, tess peels back the collar of her shirt, briefly showing off the bite mark at the curve of her neck and shoulder. joel’s anger quickly drops into one of surprise, “oh, christ!”

“oops, right?” tess scoffs, before crossing the room towards ellie, “give me your arm... this was three weeks. i was bitten an hour ago and it’s already worse. this is fucking real joel!” she takes a step towards joel after dropping ellie’s arm, “you’ve got to get this girl to tommy’s. he use to run with this crew, he’ll know where to go.”

“no, no! this was your crusade! i’m not doing that!” joel states, a mix of emotions already crowding into his tone before tess shakes her head, “yes you are! there’s enough here that you have to feel some sort of obligation for me so you need to get that girl to tommy’s.”

the moment is quickly ended as shouts from outside catches everyone’s attention. you turn, cursing under your breath as fedra soldiers jump out from their vehicles and make their way up towards the capitol building, “they’re here.... i can buy you some time but you have to run.”

“you want us to just leave you here?” ellie asks in disbelief, dread already filling the pit of her stomach as tess nods, “yes.”

joel shakes his head, “tess... there is no way -” his sentence cut off as tess whirls around with a fierce look in her eye, “i will not turn into one of those things!”

then her expression softens, and she takes a small step towards joel, “come on... make this easy for me.” it seems joel tries to make one last attempt to have tess rethink her position which only seems to anger her more before she pushes him away, “no! just go.... just fucking go.”

“ellie...” joel calls her name, slowly backing away from tess as the younger girl begins to rapidly apologize, “i’m sorry, i didn’t mean for this...” she pleads, looking between joel and tess, only getting a small smile from the older woman before joel ushers her back, “let’s get a move on... you too! lets go!”

another large set of doors shut behind the three of you, joel shaking his head just before ellie begins to panic, “fuck! i can’t believe we did that!” her hands twist into the strands of hair framing her face, eyes filled with anguish as joel shook his head, “stop...”

“we just left her to die!” ellie exclaims again, hoping the maybe it would cause either of you do turn around and do something, but it seemed there was no going back now as joel turned to her with a rage-filled glare, “stop! you two stay close to me. we need to move.” he states before turning towards you, “you with us?”

“yes...” you answer back, already moving to pull your gun into your hand, “good, stay close and follow my lead.”

he leads you both up the steps, and you find yourself lingering at the top when the doors burst open and you hear gunfire rain through the building before an explosion gets set off -- and then silence. you and ellie share a solemn look before joel urges you both to continue.

you’re almost instantly met with more fedra soldiers that come flooding down the hallways, all shouting commands. you spare a glance towards joel, trying to see what the game plan would be in taking out these soldiers -- to which he brings his finger to his lips before motioning for the two of you to follow.

you’re not entirely sure how he’s able to do it, but slowly, the three of you sneak past the entirety of the fedra squad roaming around the building. and you nearly have to keep yourself from laughing aloud when they make their reports and frustratingly state they haven’t found anything.

you sneak past the last two soldiers, and head towards the door leading out of the building. “there’s stairs over there.” ellie points out across the street -- an old metro access tunnel. you follow after joel, making sure ellie stays in your sights and ever present in front of you.

the moment you start down stairs, shouts and an engine revving shoots fear down the length of your spine, “fuck! run!” you shout to joel and ellie in front of you, just as a spray of bullets starts to rain down into the old subway station.

you continue to run, only stopping long enough to pull your mask from your bag when joel calls out spores coming up ahead. with your mask secure, you trail around behind joel and ellie, taking up a hiding spot behind an old desk booth. narrowly missing the fedra officer that rounds the corner just as you do so.

“how the hell are you breathing in this stuff?” joel questions from beside you, and with a confused face, you turn to find ellie without a mask -- a part of you panics for a moment as you get ready to root through your bag for a spare mask until you remember her bit mark. so, she really was infected. then ellie shakes her head, “i wasn’t lying to you.”

as more fedra officers flood into the subway, you realize that there wasn’t going to be an easy way to sneak through this time around. you pull your gun from your waistband, cursing under your breath when you notice the amount of bullets you have left, “try and take them out quietly, i’m sure they’ve got some extras on them. only use that if you need to.”

you nod, looking over at ellie and motioning for her to stay close as you and joel slowly work through the squad of soldiers, occasionally hearing her praise the takedown or warning you about the someone coming up that you maybe didn't see.

the next obstacle comes in trying to get out of the subway, and finding that some of the tunnels were flooded and getting across was proving to be a little difficult, “is now a good time to remind you two that i can’t swim?” ellie asks staring out over the water before turning back towards you and joel.

“there’s a wooden pallet over there, joel or i could push you on it and you can let down that ladder.” you state, gesturing down towards the pallet and then towards the drawn up ladder on the other side.

“sounds good to me.” joel jumps down into the water, nearly gasping at how cool is was before swimming over to grab the pallet. he circles back around, and waits as ellie gets atop the wooden pallet. joel then gently moves the pallet to the other side, discarding it the second she unlatches the ladder.

you follow over, cursing loudly when you finally dip into the water -- earning a chuckle from ellie as you swim over to the other side and quickly climb up the ladder to follow the both of them out.

the three of you step out from the subway tunnel, your hands already pulling your mask from your face and taking a deep breath of the outside air. joel coughs a few times to the side of you, settling atop an old box as he racks his brain on what to do next.

“look... about tess...” ellie begins, hands twisting nervously before joel’s gaze lifts to lock with her own and fire lights behind his eyes, “here’s how this thing is gonna work out. you don’t bring up tess, ever. let’s just keep our histories to ourselves. secondly, don’t tell anyone about your... condition. they’re gonna think you’re crazy and kill you. and lastly, you do what i say, when i say it. we clear?”

ellie sighs, “sure.”

“repeat it.” joel growls, earning another sigh from the girl before crossing her arms over her chest and fixing him with her own hard look, “what you say goes.”

“what about you?” joel now questions you, wanting to see where you stand since the sudden turn of events. not like any of what had just happened was anticipated when your orders had been given, so he needed to know that everyone was on the same page before moving on, “i don’t have much of a choice in the matter. and considering that i never oversaw her being handed off, my orders still stand.”

joel scoffs, muttering something under his breath about orders, which causes you to roll your eyes, “you and i are both tasked with getting her to the fireflies, whether you like that or not. besides, i took an oath and i will not be abandoning my post.”

“good, there’s a town a few miles north of here. there’s a fella that owes me a few favors. good chance he could get us a car.” joel stands from his seat, already moving in the direction that you are assuming you’d need to take to get to wherever joel’s friend was located.

“okay.” ellie agreed, followed by your own noise of agreement before joel nods,“lets get a move on.”

series navigation ⇢ [ series masterlist | chapter three ]

#the last of us #the last of us x reader #the last of us imagine #ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams imagine #female!reader #twistnet #twistnet works 2023 #twistnet :: series #series :: firefly

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eponastory · 7 months

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@pizzalover8969

I come bearing gifts!

Marlene

If there was an award for the worst credit score ever, it would go to Dante. Not that he needed good credit to get what he wanted anyway, but it did help his chances. If there was negative credit, that was where his was. That did not matter because he found someone with a really good sale going on.

Two hours of talking to a sleazy car salesman later, he drove out of the parking lot with a very old red Dodge Caravan.

He got it for the rock bottom price of one thousand dollars. Which covered the price of the state of the art sound system from the early 2000s. It even had a CD player. Oh, and a tiny disco ball hanging from the rear-view mirror. There were some dents in the doors. The biggest one was on the driver's side, where he could not get the door open. That was not a problem. He could dive in through the window.

The seats were gray with some brown stains on them from soda or something else entirely. He was not going to really think about it. But it was clean. It smelled good even though there was the faint smell of pot and cigarette smoke still lingering in the AC. Overall, it had potential.

Oh, and it came with a built-in cat bed. Cat included.

Actually, the cat had been living in there for a while since one of the rear windows had a decent sized hole in it. That knocked five hundred dollars off the price. Overall, Dante was pretty happy with his purchase.

Now, he did not have to worry about spending money on hotels for jobs that took him away from home. Nope, he was going to rip out those back seats and throw a mattress back there. He even thought about adding in a little refrigerator in there for cold drinks. It was a solid plan.

Really, he had the ability to sleep anywhere, but he wanted a damn mattress to sleep on.

So that was that.

The best thing about the van... was the sound of the engine. It purred like a charger. That was because someone actually put a refurbished charger engine under the hood. Oh yes, it was a muscled up minivan that roared like it was going out of style. He had to have it.

And it was in his favorite color.

How lucky could he get?

Now, all he had to do was pop a few decals on it, tear out those seats, and name the cat. The cat was not leaving without a fight, so it stayed. Doing all of that took less than an hour. Well, except naming the cat.

"What is this piece of shit doing here?" And there it was. The voice that always had something to say. "Oh no... this can't be his." He popped his head out of the back of the van as he was adjusting the mattress in the back. "Dante, are you for real right now?" It was Lady.

"As real as my new baby." He smiled wide as he hopped out and patted the exterior of the van. "You like her?"

"Her?" Lady looked at him in shock as he stood next to his new pride and joy. "You named this hunk of junk?"

"Hey, you're gonna hurt Marlene's feelings if you don't stop calling her names." He caressed the chipped red paint as though it were his one true love. He was only doing it to get a rise out of Lady anyway. "It's okay, Marlene, I'll make the mean lady apologize." The absolute shock on the huntresses' face at how outlandish Dante was being had him close to breaking down in laughter. "See, you hurt her feelings."

"Dante, cut the bullshit." She fell into a dead stare and crossed her arms. He could not help himself.

"Lady, do you see any bulls out here?" Her buttons were easy to push at this point as he held his arms out, motioning to the street around them.

"Ugh... you're infuriating!" And that was when she gave up. Stomping away like a teenager after being picked on by an older sibling. "I'm going to Starbucks!"

"Hey, can you get me a pumpkin spice latte?" He asked as she walked away, but instead, she just threw her middle finger up in the air. "I guess not." Dante turned his attention back to the red van with a smile. "She'll come around."

Once everything was in place and the black cat affectionately given the name of 'Lulu', the van was ready for its first job. The only problem was that there were no jobs. It had been a bit dry in the gin and tonic department, too.

There was Vergil.

Bad idea. Vergil would not set foot or ass in Marlene.

Trish?

Nah, she was likely to throw the van at him for even asking.

Nero.

Nero could use a little bit of a night out. He happened to be in town, doing who knows what. It was the perfect night, too, because there was a band playing at one of his local haunts.

He even bought a new pair of shades to wear while cruising around in Marlene. Putting them on, he climbed in through the window and started up the engine. The grin on his face when the beautiful beast under the hood roared to life only grew wider. Yes, this was a very good buy.

"Let's rock, Baby!" He turned the music on, playing 80s rock. It was a good thing he kept all of those CDs from the 90s.

As he rode down the street with the windows down and a terrified cat curled up in the bed behind his seat, he sang to Metallica. That was when he spotted Nero walking down the sidewalk with his hands in his pocket. That was also the moment that 'Don't Stop Believing' came on.

It was time to embarass the shit out of his nephew.

Dante hung his head out of the window as he sidled up to the curb, singing loudly. Every word sung really loud and surprisingly not off key, but it was enough to stop Nero in his tracks.

"Get in Loser! We're going bar hopping!" The look on the kid's face was somewhere between confused and embarrassed. Just like the day Dante told him Vergil was his old man. Ah, memories.

"What the hell is this?" The younger man motioned to the red van that Dante was practically hanging out of as he parked. "You going through a midlife crisis or something?"

"Nope, just taking an idea from you." He pulled his sunglasses down to look the kid in the eyes. "I couldn't pass up a good deal."

"What do you call a deal these days? Chipped paint and a cracked up engine?" Nero laughed as Dante put the vehicle in park and climbed out of the window.

"I'll have you know, the car was free." He grunted as his feet landed on the ground. "I pretty much paid for the stereo system, and the cat was free too."

"Cat?" He nodded at the younger man as he reached back into the van, pulling out a black cat who was growling.

"Meet Lulu, my newest employee." Dante scratched the irritated cat under the chin, only to recieve a bite. "Okay, let me just put that back in there. She doesn't like to be disturbed." He gently put the cat back in the van.

"I don't even know what to say." Nero could not believe what he was seeing. Or why he was even seeing it. As a matter of fact, he was not even sure he was in the same reality at that moment. Sure, Dante could be a bit... out there... but this was something else.

"Don't say anything and get in the van." Dante set his shades back up on the bridge of his nose as he hopped back into the driver's seat.

"I'm going to regret this." There was no point in resisting. Nero sighed as he walked around to the passenger side and got in. At least the door opened on that side. "It smells like weed in here."

"Shhhhhh... just sit back and enjoy the ride."

#yes dante named his minivan marlene but we can change it #dante makes people lose their minds with his antics #humor #devil may cry #dante #dmc #fanfic #devil may cry fanfiction #dante sparda #devil may cry 5 #nero #Lady is done with Dantes BS #pizzalover8969

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age-of-moonknight · 9 months

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What If…? Dark: Moon Knight (Vol. 1/2023), #1.

Writer: Erica Schultz; Penciler and Inker: Edgar Salazar; Colorist: Arif Prianto; Letterer: Cory Petit

#Marvel #Marvel comics #What If…? Dark: Moon Knight #Moon Knight comics #latest release #Luminary #Marlene Alraune #Raul Bushman #get his REAR Marlene #I think what I like so much about this story is that it’s a bit of a reverse fridging #where it’s the boyfriend who dies early on and motivates the heroine’s journey into vigilantism and revenge #and even then this isn’t a true fridging as Marc’s loss is still distinctly felt after his passing #as opposed to being completely swept aside #and I think they quite adeptly side step the accusation of ‘oh of course Marc’s passing is being grieved in this story #because women are more emotional while a dude would have just moved along :////’#by alluding to Frenchie’s own grieving process #indicating that this is simply a story that takes a more human approach to how comic book characters might react #to losing a loved one #who’s not completely forgotten nor completely idolized (which I think is a role Gwen Stacey fell into a lot in 70’s-90’s Spider-Man comics)#but instead they wrestle with a complex individual’s legacy who could simultaneously inspire frustration and the desire to do great good

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kermitobsessed · 7 months

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What I think the Marauder Girls Would Keep in their Cars:

Lily evans:

would def decorate with crochetted or fake vines

Decorate the radio with cute little stickers

Purple, pea green, hot pink everything

A little frog teddy buddie (she gets nervous driving alone. His name is rickety. Dorcas crocheted him and Mary named him)

Umbrella in the back

Has a green car

Has a bag with everything theyd need (sunscreen, hats, beanies, spare jumper)(they rarely ever need it but she always says “just in case!”)

Mary:

plenty of blankets (i mean like FIVE. She insists its the right amount bc one for each passenger)

Always has the heater all the way up

Lollies in the glove box

Fluffy pink seat covers

Marlene:

heater and air con are forever broken

Red nail polish and a lighter collection in the glove box (the police are bound to suspect her of arson eventually but she insists its cool)

A whole ass guitar (she basically lives in her car with the amount of stuff she has

Fluffy Cheetah print steering wheel cover

The radio is held together with duck tape

The stuffed dice on the rear-view mirror (a gift from dorcas)

“Hides” spare cash in sunnies compartment (has been stolen before but shes just never learns)

Still has old CDs (her car is so old you need them)

Red car

ash tray (would sometimes forget to open the windows and end up being scolded by lily for accidentally hot boxing them all)

Dorcas:

Magazines all over the place

Heart shaped sunnies

Books behind the front seats

Has the nicest car out of all of them

Spare clothes in a bag in the back

WAY cleaner than everyone else's (she is physically repulsed by the mess of marlene’s car)

Pandora:

Honestly, i just see hippie van

Would always speed.

Grows plants in her backseat (it perplexes literally everyone but she insists the movement helps them)

#Marauders #marauder girls #Marauders modern au #kinda not really but idk how else to describe it

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joel-doggystyle-miller · 1 year

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Joel looks up, studying you. “The hell do you mean, part of her brain?” He turns as the door opens, Marlene coming in a moment later. “What the hell is happenin’?”

“Joel…” Marlene approaches slowly.

“I wanna see Ellie. Take me to her right now.” He demands. “Let me see her.”

“She’s- I can’t,” she shakes her head. “She’s being prepped for surgery.”

Joel rears back, his panic starting to set in further. You knew. You were right. “Surgery,” he breathes. “No. You said you needed her blood.”

“And now it’s mutated or something,” Marlene tries to explain. “I don’t- they need access to her brain…”

“You can’t just do that t’her,” Joel gets to his feet, walking closed as he jabs a finger at the door. “Let me see her.”

“I can’t do that,” Marlene whispers. “I’m sorry.”

“That’s my little girl,” he breathes, “y’gotta let me go. Don’t make me do things I swore I wouldn’t do ever again, Marlene.”

I look up at Marlene, “there’s somebody that knows Vaccines in New York,” I tell her, “lots of doctors an’ people. Can’t you find them? Instead of killing her?”

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luveline · 2 years

Text

this early dancing (1/2) | sirius black x reader

Sirius turned the camera on your faces. You rested your cheek against his arm and smiled shyly, happy to see his handsome grin.

“Stop hiding. We need a good one to look back on,” he said seriously.

“We take photos all the time,” you argued.

“Indulge me.”

summary blindly in love with your best friend Sirius you find yourself sharing a room with him on a group holiday to the seaside. it wasn’t ever going to go any other way [11k]

warnings fluff, smut, marauders era, mutual pining, idiots in love, she/her pronouns used for reader, fem!reader

With your head sticking out the window of James Potter's people carrier you felt like you were flying, face tilted up to the sun to soak in the seaside warmth. You couldn't be far from the Potter cottage now, having played passenger as peacefully as you were able to for hours now whilst the boys took turns driving.

"Moons," Sirius said from behind the wheel. Remus lifted his eyes from the book he was fighting to read in annoyance - you hadn't left him alone since the trip had begun, and only with your head out the window had he managed to return to his well worn novel.

"What?"

"Pull her back in, would you?" he requested, nodding his head towards you. Remus' warm hand grabbed blindly at the short sleeve of your t-shirt until you conceded and sat flat again.

"Pull her?" James muttered from the front seat, tired from driving the first half of the road trip. "I barely know 'er."

"That 'barely' works," Lily complained from his side, though she wiped the hair from his forehead tenderly.

Marlene booed from behind Remus, which had her seat mates Dorcas and Mary laughing jovially. Emmeline took no notice of any of it at Remus' other side, also reading.

"I don't care how you do it, get her down," Sirius said in concern.

"She's down," you assured him.

"Lovely Y/N will live to see another day," Mary agreed, low voice soft and lilting.

You blushed from all the attention and shimmied down.

"She's embarrassed!" Marlene cooed, reaching over to pinch your shoulders.

Sirius peaked in the rear view mirror and grinned. "Don't be embarrassed, but please leave the dog like activity to me."

"If that's a sex joke, I don't get it," Emmeline said.

"And who does that surprise?" Remus muttered.

You laughed behind your hand, boiling now from the heat. You couldn't help from fidgeting, pulling the fabric of your shirt away from your sticky chest, concerned you looked a sight. Not that the other members of your troupe looked any better; Remus fought a good fight but ultimately didn't look as unbothered by the heat as he acted. James was openly complaining about the sun from the front seat, arguing that he should be allowed to sleep in the relative darkness of the back.

"Too bad, Pots," Marlene said, pressed up against Mary and Dorcas. Only the cool safety allowed them to maintain friendly contact without melting, you knew, and felt very jealous.

"We earned these seats fair and square," agreed Dorcas, legs thrown over your seat, sandal clad toes poking in between you and Remus.

"You cheated! No way can somebody win rock paper scissors 23 times in a row," James said conspiringly.

"Prove it."

You quite fancied that she'd cheated too, though you knew better than to give James any fuel for his fire. Sirius, despite the many years of friendship, had not learned this lesson yet, and so he said, "She definitely did."

"Thank you! Thank you, Pads," he leaned over Lily's arm to grasp his best friend's arm, "my bro."

"Ew, ew, ew! They're getting gooey!"

"They can't help their love," Mary said to Dorcas, patting her arm. "Don't give them too much shit for it."

Sirius leaned his head down to kiss James hand and almost crashed into an oncoming car.

"Lily! Tell your boyfriend's boyfriend to keep his eyes on the road!" Dorcas roared, sandals twitching.

You leaned forward to press your hand at the back of Sirius' neck. "Watch the road, loverboy."

"You got it, sweetheart," he said, eyes obediently on the journey ahead.

Determined to ignore the pleasure that shot through you at the sincere pet name you ran your fingers through the raven hairs at the back of his neck and noted how it was damp with sweat. You pulled the bobble from your wrist and pushed up onto your feet as tall as you could manage, neck craned against the roof of the van to pull his hair back from his face delicately until it was in a moderately neat ponytail at the back of his head. You made quick work of the bobble and tucked the piece you'd missed behind his ear.

"Thank you," he said warmly. Then, "Put your belt on, idiot."

You scratched the skin behind his ear lightly in acknowledgement, a silent you're welcome between you both, and sat back down.

James soon fell asleep against Lily's shoulder. She held his face to her chest tightly and kissed his forehead. You made yourself look away to study the book in Remus' hands.

Remus said something to you and you missed it, attention monopolised by Sirius' soft singing along to the radio. "Hmm?" you asked him, blinking.

"How's your car sickness?" he asked.

You smiled dismissively at your friend's concern. "Fine. Better if I don’t look down for a while.”

He nodded. You went back to your silence and found your stomach turning quickly after that, punished for trying to read while the van rocked. You pushed your face out the window again, eyes on the quick-approaching sea. It was a stunning blue, sunlight blinding you as it bounced off the waves. You squinted and held your hand up uselessly.

"Here," Sirius said, hand reaching back. He was offering his sunglasses to you through the gap.

"Thank you," you said. His finger danced a quick line over your hand, his own silent you’re welcome, and then he was back to driving.

You loved most about your friendship with Sirius the things you didn't have to say. You weren't sure when the scratching had begun, only that it had, and that the slither of intimacy drove you insane.

Pushing his sunglasses up your nose you turned back to the view. The lenses helped dull the bright light of the waves nicely but they did nothing for your best friend; Sirius was as golden as ever. You found him difficult to look at, sometimes.

"How far are we now?" Lily asked quietly, hand in James' hair.

"Not far," Sirius murmured, voice sending tingles through your chest, "and then our summer can really begin."

You gulped a breath of fresh air and willed the nausea away, not fully confident it was car sickness after all. Remus nudged you with his elbow. "You want a polo?"

You laughed weakly. "No."

"Might make you less ill."

"I'm alright."

He huffed like he didn't believe you. You were amazed at his ability to keep his eyes on the page and unwrap a polo mint for you at the same time. He pressed it into your hand. "Eat that, dove."

You smiled gratefully. "Thank you."

"Welcome."

You sucked on the mint and twiddled your thumbs. You wished you would've put your camera around your wrist rather than in your suitcase. If anything you could've been taking sneaky pictures of the back row for you and Sirius to pick over later - you were sure Marlene was dating Dorcas. Sirius was sure it was Mary. James swore up and down it was Dorcas and Mary where Remus shrugged and said it was nobody's business. Lily definitely knew and wasn't telling. Alice probably knew because Lily knew, and Emmeline was about as oblivious to it all as she was everything else.

You didn't know who was snogging who but you knew for certain it wasn't you.

Sirius caught your eye in the rear view mirror. "What're you eating?"

You bit the polo between your teeth and bared it to him.

"Working?"

You nodded.

"Alright. Let me know if you want to pull over."

"Fuck off! If we stopped every time Y/N gets sick we'll never get there," Marlene protested, and then, "Hey! Stop fucking pinching me."

"Be nicer," Mary said softly.

"You first."

"We don't need to pull over. I'm fine."

"Better we pull over then have the car smell like sick all day," Dorcas argued.

"Guys," you were almost begging now, desperate for the attention to be on somebody else, "I won't be sick."

"You won't be," Remus said firmly.

"Aim for Moony's lap," Sirius advised.

No sooner had the people carrier pulled onto the Potter cottage driveway had you thrown the door open to keel over by the front garden grass. You were breathing heavily in an effort to overcome the sinking feeling, more than relieved to finally be on solid, unmoving ground. You could smell salt and clay on the breeze, the sun-warmed grass soft under your feet.

Sirius came up behind you, pushing his hand over the skin between your shoulder blades.

He didn't say anything. You'd played these parts before: disapparation made you feel sick, too, and the floo, and brooms and trains and planes - it all made you sick to your stomach. You could barely withstand a piggyback.

You swallowed a heave desperately.

"If you need to be sick, be sick," Sirius said gently.

You wanted to tell him to fuck off, suddenly and unfairly infuriated with him. His hand felt like a poker on your shoulders and you wanted to shrug out from underneath his touch. You recognised that was insane and not an appropriate reaction to your best friend comforting you and so you let him rub what was intended to be a soothing path up past your shoulders and then down to the bottom of your back.

You could hear Lily cheering about the sunset. You could see the pink purple sky out of the corner of your eye and worried you were missing an extraordinary picture.

"Alright?" Sirius asked, noticing your stillness.

You stood up, nodding. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders and shook you about, squeezing. "God, I'm sorry. You really can't handle it, can you? Poor girl."

You relaxed under his arm and let him steer you to the cliffside overlooking the beach where everybody else had gathered. The sky was a shock of cherry pink at the horizon melting up into a deeper purple. You felt your lips part at the sight. No matter how many photographs you took of the sky on your shoddy camera, it never looked like the real thing.

You and Sirius looked at each other and grinned. Your eyes darted from eye to eye, pupils wobbling, and Sirius pulled his arm away, patting you on the shoulder.

"Where's your camera? That'll be a nice one to commemorate our first night here."

You retrieved your camera from the boot and noticed Alice and Frank's car pulling in.

"Perfect timing!" you called to them, grinning. "Group photo."

Your friend's all piled in for the photograph. The girl’s gathered in the middle, Alice with Frank on one end and Lily on the other. James was pressed tiredly to Lily's side whilst Sirius had wrapped his arm around the exhausted boy's shoulder. Remus was begrudgingly pulled into the throng of women in the middle.

"Alright, guys. Say cheese," you said, raising your camera.

"Hey! It has a timer, doesn't it?" Lily protested.

"Set it up on the birdbath, love!" James called.

You rolled your eyes but did as they asked. With the camera ticking you rushed over to Sirius' side, who pushed you in between him and James and stretched his hand back over your shoulder. He smelled familiarly of his cologne.

"Big smiles!" Lily said loudly.

You smiled wide. The camera flashed brightly and then everyone was laughing and rubbing their eyes.

"Merlin, that's bright," Emma whined.

Remus patted her shoulder in sympathy and then walked off, leaving her blindsided. James sat down heavily on the grass and complained he'd never drive again, and he certainly wouldn't be helping get the things from the car. Lily sat down with him in solidarity. They both laughed roaringly at everybody else's indignation and refused to move until everyone had put their things away. You stayed outside, trying to catch photographs of the sky while it still looked so lovely. When James and Lily weren't looking you took a quick photo of their dark outlines in the grass, both their hair splayed around them, heads inclined toward each other, hands twined.

You finally walked over to the car to gather your things, gravel crunching under your canvas shoes. They’d already been taken in. You frowned and let yourself into the cottage. All the lights were on and Remus was talking very crossly from the landing upstairs.

“This is a holiday,” he was saying pointedly, “I will not be sharing a room with you, Pads. I won’t sleep.”

“I know I’m handsome but you don’t have to stay up and watch me,” Sirius sniffed. You stopped halfway up the stairs to listen to them argue.

“You snore! You know you do!”

Sirius winced. “A good friend would pretend not to notice.”

“A good friend would release me. Please, Pads.”

“I don’t know what you want me to do!”

“Sleep on the sofa?”

“You’re being an absolute wan-“

“Room with me,” you said easily, ascending the last few steps.

Remus frowned. “I wouldn’t force him on you, Y/N.”

“I snore too,” you said, shrugging. “Won’t notice.”

Having a room to yourself had been the one game of rock paper scissors you’d managed to win between the girls with no partners (as far as you could tell).

Sirius was looking at you strangely. You backtracked. “I mean, if that’s alright. I can get changed in the bathroom and I’m an excellent roommate, and-“

“It's alright. It’s brilliant, actually. Thanks, sweetheart.”

You smiled brightly. “That’s okay. Wouldn’t want poor Remus to suffer you.”

Sirius frowned. “What’s with everyone’s vendetta against me? Am I such a terrible roommate?”

“Yes,” James called from the bottom of the stairs. “God awful.”

“Right,” Sirius said solemnly, pulling his wand from his back pocket. James cringed backwards.

“Let’s not make any hasty decisions.”

“Trust me, I’ve been thinking about this one.”

You pointed Sirius’ wand up at the rafters and giggled madly when they turned a fluorescent yellow. "What happened to our no magic holiday?"

James squawked. “That would’ve gone garishly with my lovely skin,” he said, preening like a bird. Lily rolled her eyes and patted one of his lovely brown shoulders in mock comfort. “There there, babe.”

Sirius was half pouting at you. “He deserved that one.”

“He didn’t. You’re all cranky from driving. You’ll be besties again at breakfast.”

“Make that brunch,” James called.

Marlene called down something in response that you missed as Sirius shut the door behind you. Your room was big enough to fit two single beds with room to waltz between them, soft white bedding atop raglan furnishings set in a neutral tan room with an en suite bathroom, it was nicer than your room at home. You set your wand and camera down on the nightstand and sank into the marsh softness of the mattress, sighing.

Sirius did the same in his respective bed.

“You okay?” you asked him, peering over your shoulder at his languid form. He stretched his hands over his head, shoulder muscles moving underneath his graphic t-shirt. You bit your lip and watched him indulgently.

“Tired. Are you still feeling poorly?”

You shook your head. Though he didn’t turn to look you assumed he’d sensed it, as words didn’t pass between you again for a while.

“You really don’t mind rooming with me?”

You fiddled with your bracelet. It was a simple chain, gold-plated with a small piece of green jade at the centre. Sirius had gifted it to you for your birthday and you hadn’t taken it off since.

“I don’t mind.”

“It’ll be fun,” he decided.

“Like a sleepover,” you agreed.

“Exactly.”

Where had this awkward space come from? You suspected you were imagining it, so afraid of revealing your fondness for him that you were now hesitating to talk to him. You didn’t trust yourself sometimes to idle in his company. How maddening that a confession rooted itself at the front of your mouth, always waiting for you to get too close, to feel too loved.

I love you, I love you, I love you.

He turned toward you so sharply you spooked yourself, scared you’d said it out loud.

“Picture?”

“What?”

“Let’s take a picture. Me and you.”

Your smile crept up slowly at the corners. You shuffled across the bed to make space for him and he filled it, strands of his hair tickling your face as he settled. He grabbed your camera from the bedside table and struggled through its workings until it was green and ready to go, moaning about how you could possibly get along with such muggle-like contraptions. You knew he was grumbling for the sake of it and that in reality he liked your magic camera just as much as you did. It was brilliant, really, you could take loads of photos before it got full and with a simple spell you could look through them projected onto the wall like a small television.

Sirius turned the camera on your faces. You rested your cheek against his arm and smiled shyly, happy to see his handsome grin. You thanked god that you could veto whichever pictures you wanted because as long as Sirius was pressed up at your side smelling like sweetness and himself so sharply it made your heart ache, smiling like he wanted to be nowhere else, you’d look like a lovesick fool in every photograph.

The flash blinded you.

“Is there a setting that doesn’t jeopardise our eyesight?” Sirius inquired.

You buried your face in his arm and giggled.

“Stop hiding. We need a good one to look back on,” he said seriously.

“We take photos all the time,” you argued.

“Indulge me.”

The way he said it - you smiled with teeth and didn’t complain.

When you woke up Sirius was still asleep. You moved to lie on your side so you could watch him breathing, tracing the rising and falling line of his chest, the hair he'd left in your bobble the night before, his soft sleep shirt peeking out where the duvet had slipped in the night time.

You could hear the clinking of dishes and easy conversation echoing up the stairs, followed swiftly by the smell of frying bacon and eggs, the sweeter scent of pancakes hot on its tail.

Sirius made a sound in his sleep. You reached your hand out over the gap despite being yards too far to touch him, lining your hand up with his head and pretended you were smoothing the soft strands of ebony hair from his face, tucking it behind his ears. You'd kiss his forehead afterwards, breathe in the smell of his hair or tuck your face in the nook of his shoulder, slot yourself by his side like you belonged.

There was a sound of smashing glass and a shock of laughter that made you both flinch, rousing Sirius awake. You let your hand fall to hang over the side of the bed, fingers an inch from the hardwood floor.

He blinked the sleep from his eyes and stretched, turning flat on his back. You copied him, pulling the blankets up over your nose.

"Y/N," he said softly, words warped by a yawn, "you awake?"

"Yes," you whispered, aiming for casualness and missing by a mile.

You turned your head and he was looking at you with a happy, tired smile. You smiled back and then realised he couldn't see it.

"Do you want to shower?" he asked you.

"I showered after you fell asleep."

He sat up and hunched over, hair falling in his face, necklace slipping out from under his shirt to dangle in the space between his chest and his legs. It was a chain with a thumbnail sized circle of silver hanging from it. You suspected it was engraved but had never had reason to get a good look, and were too shy to ask.

He scratched his face, his two days stubble. His hands looked funny without a ring or two, you'd never seen them early enough in the morning to catch him without them.

You pushed the duvet down and stared at the ceiling as he got to his feet and scrounged through his bags for clean clothes and his towel. You'd already shoved your toiletries in the bathroom last night.

"You want to go eat?"

You shook your head. "I'll wait for you."

"I'll be fast."

"Take as long as you want."

You should not have said that, you realised, twenty minutes later with a rumbling stomach and Sirius nowhere to be seen. You'd whipped up to get changed in case he'd been as quick as he promised, worried he'd walk in on you starkers. Lily had pronounced the first proper day had to be a beach day, so you'd put on a bikini top and simple white t-shirt with short sleeves and a pair of shorts over your bikini bottoms.

You picked at the seams of your crisp denim shorts and wondered if you should be wearing a skirt, no doubt like Lily and Alice would be. Marlene was likely naked or close to it, Mary would wear a sundress, Dorcas did as she liked and Emma might show up in a hazmat suit.

You pouted and leapt to your feet, rushing for your bag. You'd packed a beach cover up and so you might as well wear it rather than feel insecure in your shorts. You unbuttoned them and pulled them off, kicked them under your bed for now.

The bathroom door opened before you'd located the cover up. You looked up like a deer-in-headlights and Sirius was looking at you too, but he didn't look nearly so bashful. Obviously - there was no need. You were going to the beach and he was bound to see you in your bikini eventually, and still you felt naked as the day you were born.

You smiled fleetingly and crouched down to ruffle through your bags for the wrap skirt. It was plain and black, simple enough that you didn't feel as though it would garner much attention. You pulled it on and then found your sandals and put them on too.

Sirius hummed appraisingly. "You look nice."

"Thanks," you said warmly, cheeks heating, "you look nice too."

And he did, lean thighs showcased by a pair of dark swim shorts and a white cotton vest that hugged his chest keenly. You almost matched.

He'd tucked his necklace back under the fabric. Your bobble was loose around his wrist, hair curling and wet dripping on his maddening shoulders. He'd trimmed up his face but still had a shadow like he usually did. You wanted to run your hands over his face and feel the dark stubble under your fingers so instead you cleared your throat and whispered past him to the bathroom to freshen up.

You came out smelling much nicer and feeling cleaner, face all softened up by cleanser and moisturiser.

"You have sunscreen?" you asked him.

"Nah. Greek doesn't burn."

"Greek does get skin cancer," you said pointedly, pulling your shoulder purse open to check you had what you needed.

Sirius pushed the door open and held it for you, beaming down at you. "If I let you put it on me will you stop scowling?"

You relaxed your face. "I'm not scowling."

He'd tilted his head back and laughed at you all the way down the stairs.

James was at the stove, brown skin speckled by white powder. You laughed at the sheer amount of flour he'd managed to wipe up his own face.

He was on the defensive quickly. "Laugh it up! No pancakes for either of you," he said, pointing his spatula at you both. Sirius scoffed in indignation.

"Am I to be punished for everything she does?"

James nodded pensively. "Indeed."

Lily was sitting on the countertop near the sink. You sidled up to her side and opened a glass fronted cupboard to retrieve a glass to fill with water. She had a piece of toast in one hand and pushed your hair flat with the other.

"I love your skirt," she said.

Her's wasn't so different to your own, you thought, and then realised that was the joke. Her long legs were outfitted in a black wrap skirt that didn't so much hide her blue bikini as it accentuated it. She hadn't bothered with a shirt, which you applauded.

"Thanks, babe," she said.

"Such a pair of tits shouldn't ever be hidden. Ti's the true tragedy they must be encased at all," James agreed.

"What is this character you're doing?" Sirius spluttered. "You ridiculous man!"

"I doth not know what you mean."

You smiled to yourself and sat down next to Mary, who was looking pretty as a picture in her lilac sundress. She'd styled her twists into a half bun that showcased her pretty face, her dark skin glowing in the morning light. You felt a shoot of jealousy and then grimaced at yourself. There wasn't any need to be jealous - your friends were gorgeous and so were you.

Still, you found yourself ogling Mary's clear skin reverently.

"You're glowing," you complimented her, pulling a bowl of fresh fruit towards you, no doubt Mary's doing.

"Thank you! I got this new serum with almond oil that makes me really soft and dewy, and it smells really good too."

"Yeah?"

"Mm, from Boots. Oh, you want coffee?"

"No, thanks," you said at the same time as Sirius said, "You're a godsend, Mary."

Mary smiled brightly, lifting the pot of coffee towards his outstretched mug. "I know."

He sipped at his coffee with his hand on the back of your chair. You tried your best to ignore this and found yourself on ends anyways, wondering what the back of your head looked like.

He stole fruit from your plate and wouldn't back down, even when you started fighting back with your fork. You'd almost speared him when Marlene walked in with Dorcas looking dazed behind her, grinning. "We're ready."

"I'll grab Remus and then we'll go," James said, untying his apron. There was a naked square where it had been, and he looked down at it frowning. "After I change my shirt."

"Thanks for the pancakes," Emma called after him.

"You're welcome. At least somebody appreciates my efforts," James said from the bottom of the stairs.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Get a load of him. Makes breakfast and now he's Saint Lucy."

You smiled up at him. "He can be whatever he wants if he's making pancakes every morning. Though Saint James has a terrible ring to it."

Sirius wiped the corner of your mouth with the tip of his index finger. "Wasn't he beheaded?"

You shrugged, biting back a laugh. You didn't know why you were smiling so wide but Sirius was, and his beatific grin was contagious.

"I hope you aren't planning to execute my boyfriend," Lily said, jumping down from the countertop. Her red, smooth hair moved in a sheet behind her.

"Don't think of it as an execution, Lils."

"An exoneration," you suggested.

"A freeing."

James pushed into the kitchen with a knackered looking Remus at his side. "I've saved you so many pancakes, Moony, you wouldn't believe it. You'll be fed for days."

"Thank you, James," Remus said, rubbing a hand through his depressed hair.

"Eat up, darling boy," Sirius said loudly, "you look as though you're on the edge of death."

"I might have slept too well," he admitted sheepishly.

Sirius looked at him then and all his care melted into outrage. "Your hubris befalls you."

"Did we all decide to speak like this today or did I miss the memo?" you asked, more to yourself than anyone else.

"T'was not a decision! T'was a calling from the heavens," James piped in, looking much cleaner in his new vest and open button-up.

"T'was a twottish calling," Marlene said, laughing. This sent peels of laughter through the room and after a good chuckle, eventually everyone was smiling and ready to walk down to the beach.

Why you'd all waited to go together was a mystery, it was hardly a five minute walk down the path from the cottage cliffside before you were breaking out onto a gorgeous white stretch of sand kissing clear blue waves.

Sirius and James had carried the picnic basket between them. Lily had the cooler. You'd deigned to carry the blankets and towels and refused anyone's help, almost tripping over a piece of driftwood. You let the linens fall into the soft sand and felt the grains of it sink into your open sandals, wiggling your toes.

Your camera bounced at your chest as you traipsed over to the cooler, searching for something cold to hold against your head. It had been noon by the time everyone was ready to head out and so the sun was already making itself known, beating down on your shoulders.

"It's gorgeous," Lily said brightly.

"We'll have a bonfire tonight," James said.

Marlene laid a towel out and put her stereo, her prized possession, down on it carefully. She clicked a button and set the volume low, and the beach was suddenly alive with the hum of The Rolling Stones.

You and Lily spread the biggest blanket out away from where James had begun forming a rock circle for the barbecue and sat down on it with matching peaceable expressions, soon joined by Emmeline and Remus. Mary, Dorcus and Marlene set their towels up at the edge of the blanket and were quick to begin sunbathing.

Marlene was likely going to burn herself to a crisp trying to tan. Lily pulled the brim of her sunhat down and began slathering sunscreen over her pale legs, her stomach and chest.

"James!" she called, "come do my back, please?"

He perked up like an excited puppy. "Oh, Lilykins, you charmer."

"If I'd asked anyone else you would've sulked all day."

"Yes I would've. Now stay still, I need to get your beauty mark."

"Mole."

"Mole, whatever. Most marks on you are pretty, I get confused."

You looked down and made yourself busy covering your skin similarly in sunscreen, bringing your knees up to massage the cream into your legs and feet. You'd just managed to get your arms when a shadow was towering over you.

"What, Sirius?" you asked.

He smiled impishly. "You gonna get my back too?"

The comment made you giggle nervously. "In the event the sun could even reach your back then sure, I'd get you."

He crouched down. "You haven't rubbed it in properly. Let me," and he was touching your face, mouth so close you felt his exhales on your eyelashes. He spread the sunscreen with his thumb in a broad swipe across your cheek. "You don't think you're going overboard?"

"There's nothing overboard about protection."

"No glove, no love," he agreed under his breath.

You batted his hands away. "Grow up. Go help James make his firepit."

"Yes ma'am."

Later, you were wading through the shallows, full of barbecued foods and sparkling cider and trying not to get pushed over. The others had insisted on playing chicken and you were watching from a distance. Lily and James were the winning team, closely followed by Lily and Sirius when James got sand in his eyes.

Emmeline from atop Remus' shoulders pouted and called for justice. "Lily is obviously too good. We're never gonna win."

"Fuck you, Em! I'm at least half the team,” Sirius said, offended.

Remus tightened his hands on Emma's calves, who was wobbling as she shook her head. "The common denominator is Lily."

Lily was calling and laughing. "Quite right!"

"Sweetheart, I know you don't like chicken, but it's for a better cause, Sirius said, turning his determined gaze on you.

"Wha-" He bent down, ushering Lily off his shoulders, and you understood what he meant. "Sirius, no."

"Come on! I'll do your dishes all week."

He usually did them anyway.

"It'll make me sick."

"It won't!"

You began protesting again and he trudged towards you, big hands on your arms. He looked particularly handsome, damp and sun-kissed, eyes big with happiness and smiling like you were something good. "Get on my shoulders, Y/N."

"Fine. Just one,” you gave in, pulling your shirt off. You tossed it in the direction of your towel and set your begrudging eyes on his legs, sulking.

"Good sport!" James cheered, flat on his back stoking the small fire.

Sirius led you out into the deeper water and knelt down so you could climb over his shoulders. Once seated he got to his feet, eliciting a terrified moan from you. You grasped onto his neck tightly with your face smashed into the back of his head.

His grip was unfailing on your thighs. "Relax… I won't let you fall."

You loosened your headlock incrementally.

"Good girl. How we feeling?"

You felt a shot of pleasure at his words, and then with horror recognised that your crotch was literally at his neck.

"Y/N?"

"Great. Good. Let's do this shit," you declared, hands precarious at his neck.

He laughed and turned you to face the others. "That's my girl."

Having defeated everyone who tried to beat you at chicken, you and Sirius were very obviously feeling closer to each other, and it was infuriating everybody.

"We get it! You're good at chicken! Shut the fuck up!" Remus complained, book flat on his chest to glare at Sirius, who had been lamenting your victory with his shoulder pressed to your shoulder.

"So bitter," Sirius said suavely, running his hand up Remus' sand crusted calf, "somebody sounds a little jealous, Remy-poo."

You crinkled your nose and shook the crisp packet in your hand, looking for a nice one. James leaned over your shoulder to grab a handful and you let him, smiling at your friend. He had Lily's head in his lap and looked as blissful as a man could look.

"I hope you aren't talking to me, Remus," you said, feigning hurt. Usually he could be tricked into being his softie self but he was really quite irritated by Sirius' gloating.

"Get fucked, Y/N."

You laid your head on Sirius' shoulder, your hand on his thigh. He dug through the crisps and offered you a flavorful looking one before stealing some for himself. You knew you were pushing it - this was bordering the platonic boundary - but, high on victory and your friendship, you couldn't help yourself from cuddling up to him.

He didn't seem to mind anyhow, making conversation overtop your head as easy as breathing. You stretched your arm out blindly searching for your camera until you found it, clipping the lense cover off. You clicked the camera on, zooming in on your leg against Sirius'.

"Nice legs."

"Testing," you told him, though you hadn't been.

You twisted around to take a photograph of Lily and James, who didn't protest, Remus with his head on Mary's thigh, who did. You got a wide shot of Frank, Alice, Dorcas, Marlene and Emma playing cards before zooming into Marlene, who was leaning back on one arm, a cigarette dangling between her teeth. She took a lazy drag and laid her hand of cards out flat. "Read 'em n weep, ladies."

Dorcas groaned. "Right, I'm done. Anyone else wanna watch a film?"

"My brains fried," Alice said, nodding.

"I want my pyjamas. And a shower. Not in that order," Lily said.

Soon everyone was getting to their feet and groaning. "I have sand in places sand shouldn't be," Emma said morosely, helping you gather the sheets.

"The boys'll stay for a kick about?" James said, looking between his mates.

"No cheating this time, Prongs," Remus started.

James held up his hands. "Scout's honour."

"You didn't get in scout's, mate. Brownie's honour, at best," Frank said.

A headlock ensued. Sirius jogged over to you with his rings in hand, "Have these for me?"

"Yeah, no problem."

"Sweet," he said, kissing you on the cheek. "Shan't be long. Quick, get back before the gnats come out!"

You looked at his rings in your hand, warm still, and felt heat rise to the tops of your ears. Lily threw an arm around your shoulder and you were off up the lane. Marl had already thrown the door open, letting in the summer breeze to break through the humid heat kept in the house while you were gone. Lily rushed upstairs to catch one of the showers, citing a deep rooted annoyance at the sand in her bikini top.

You went into the kitchen and put your purse and Sirius' rings down on the countertop and started putting things away, binning everyone's leftovers and setting the plates in the sink. You'd spelled away the crumbs and food and was about to get to the dishes, hot water running and sleeves pushed up when you realised you weren't wearing your bracelet.

Your heart skipped.

It took a moment to sink in. You looked at your blank wrist in bizarre confusion, turning your hand like it might be hiding. No such luck. You scoured your eyes over the kitchen and spotted no signs of it, hand moving up to push against your forehead.

You walked out the way you came and traced the hall, the porch. You ran up the stairs two at a time and burst into your room, nosing through your bags, then did the same in the bathroom. Your chest felt tight as you stood there, walls white and blinding.

You stumbled back into the bedroom and Sirius was in the doorway.

"What's wrong?" he asked instantly.

Your eyes darted to him and then back to your bedroom floor. "My bracelet. I can't find it."

"When'd you have it last?"

"This morning. Definitely before we went to the beach."

You paled.

"Doll, don't worry-" he started, worried by your expression. You moved past him before he could finish and fled down the stairs for your purse in the kitchen. You'd looked through it once, but it didn't make sense - maybe you'd taken it off to play chicken? Unlikely. You never took it off, not ever.

"D-" Sirius was again cut off by you, eyes widening as you tipped your purse out on the kitchen floor. You picked through the contents, despairing.

"It's not here," you murmured.

Sirius was by your side. "Have you summoned it?"

You shook your head, laughing bitterly, "I put anti-spellwork on it after James turned it into a snake."

Sirius laughed and then smarted, clearing his throat.

"Right. Sorry."

Your eyes filled with tears. You looked at the bright kitchen light and willed them away.

"Hey," he said softly, moving into your eyesight, "don't cry, bub. I'll get you a new one."

You blinked, moving your head left to right like the movement might stop the overwhelming emotion. "Sirius, I want that one."

He bit his lip, pulling his hair. "Alright. Get your shoes back on and we'll go look down on the beach, yeah?"

Sirius pulled his jacket on and pulled his wand out with a Lumos at the tip, eyes steadfast to the ground as you walked. "What's it look like?"

"Sirius-" you began, feeling a little hurt.

His smile came up on one side. "Kidding, kidding. Can't forget the damn thing if I tried. You've only worn it since we were seventeen."

You rolled your eyes, momentarily forgetting the task at hand. "You know any metal-detecting spells?"

"You'll be lucky, it's made of plastic."

You chuckled weakly.

He grabbed your shoulder, digging his thumb into your skin. "Hey, don't worry about it. We'll find it. And if we don't, I really will get you a new one."

"I - it's not like that. It's special. You gave it to me, you know? It's like," you cut yourself off.

"What?" he asked, grinning smugly.

You kicked sand under your shoe. You were almost at the beach now, the tide having moved far out. You only hoped your bracelet wasn't somewhere in the waves, never to be seen again.

"Y/N?"

"It's like my piece of you."

You peeked out the corner of your eye at his expression which had gone slack at your confession.

"Right. Right," he picked up his pace incrementally, "let's get digging. We'll shovel the whole beach if we have to."

And you did, looking through the hills of sand until the sky was darkening and the sun was a yellow beam across the ocean, a multicolour spectral that splashed up your skin and drenched you in pinks and orange.

Sirius was similarly sky stained and on his knees, digging around where you'd been sitting again.

"It's alright. Let's just go back."

Sirius shook his head. "I'm gonna find this bracelet, babe."

You hugged yourself.

"Seriously, Black, let's go home. It's pointless."

Sirius ignored you, crawling over to the firepit. "Oh," he said. And then, "Found it."

He held it up between pinched fingers. "Not so pointless, as it turns out."

You couldn't believe your luck - his luck - couldn't believe it was there to find. Sirius staggered to his feet, legs completely covered in sand. You almost threw yourself at him, pushing him back with the force of your hug, wrapping your arms around his waist and then pulling back to accept the bracelet. He wrapped his own arms around your neck, holding you.

You basically danced in his hold. You stole your arms back to put the bracelet back on.

"I have great taste," he said quietly, arms still at your neck.

You laughed, really laughed, felt your chest heave with the force of it, and then you lost any and all sense of reason, any self preservation, looking at Sirius' handsome face. He was looking down at you all homespun and glowing with the sunset at his back and you couldn’t have stopped yourself from kissing him if you tried.

It caught you both by surprise. He made a small sound in the back of his throat and stilled. You pulled away quickly, still laughing (albeit scared to death) and he brought one hand up to the back of your neck to bring you back in.

His kiss was warm. He tasted of fruit juice and…

"Have you been smoking?" you asked, mouth poised over his.

He stopped short, moving the hand that was cupping your neck to your cheek. His eyes were brilliant, pupils dilated.

"No?"

"I think you have. You know those things are going to kill y-"

He kissed you again. His lips were firm, pushing down with enough force to make you retreat a step. He followed, kissing and kissing. You broke it off to finish scolding him, heartbeat in your ears.

"You'll get cancer. Is that what you want?"

He shook his head in disbelief, hand smoothing the side of your face twice quick.

"Why are you so obsessed with my having cancer?"

"Because you purposefully take stupid risks and don't think about the consequences!"

"Fucking hell," he said, chuckling, eyebrows high.

His laugh was contagious - you were so tiffed with him and so happy about the bracelet and so hot where his arms were wrapped around you, burning at his bare hand on your face. You pecked the corner of his mouth and then the other. "Idiot," you breathed.

He caught you while your mouth was still open.

You realised suddenly that you were kissing your best friend, your favourite person in the world, who you'd been half in love with since you met and more and more every day.

He was kissing you back. He was leading.

His tongue was in your mouth.

You pulled away to question him, planning on asking him what he was even doing, why was he kissing you back? He should've pushed you away, and why was his hand at your lower back? Why was he touching the naked skin there like you were something precious?

He broke the kiss and leaned his forehead on yours.

"Is it bad that I kind of like you calling me names?"

"It's terrible," you said, pushing up, mouth a millimetre from yours. When he leaned down so that your lips were touching, you hesitated coyly. "Anything else you like I should know about?"

He pushed his fingertips into your waist and smiled when you squirmed.

"Quite like your bikini," he murmured, kissing you chastely, "worse," he moved down to kiss your jawline, "I like what's underneath it."

You laughed in surprise. "That's the best you could come up with?"

"Careful," he said, punctuating the warning with a nip.

His fingers found the bow tying your bikini top shut. He tugged at one of the ties gently. Maybe he was waiting for your permission, or protest, or something, but you could only stand with your chest heaving with excitement and trepidation both. Slowly, he drew the tie open. The seconds stretched, you could barely look at him where he was unblinking, unflinching. It sprung undone, and his hands moved to the one at your neck. He was even slower the second time around, gaze heavy-lidded. Your faces were close enough that you were breathing in the others exhale, stealing air from his parted lips.

The fabric was slipping away, and suddenly Sirius was pressing you flat to his chest, hugging you tight. You frowned in confusion as he manhandled you to be where he'd been standing seconds ago, bare chest against his shirt. Frank and Alice were at the edge of the sand, holding hands. Alice gave you a knowing look.

"Wh- hi, guys!" you shouted, maybe too loudly.

"Sorry, we were coming for a walk! Didn't realise you were already down here!" Frank called, laden with innuendo.

Sirius had turned his head to laugh but was covering your naked chest by standing in your path. "That's alright, Y/N here was just cold. In fact…" he slipped his jacket off, stuffing your discarded bikini top deep into the pocket. He wrapped it around your shoulders and zipped it up, hands uncharacteristically shaky.

He stepped away from you casually. "We came to find her bracelet."

"D'you find it?" Alice asked curiously.

You pushed the sleeve of your borrowed jacket down and held your wrist up, "Sirius found it."

"Brill," Frank said.

“Yeah, we were just leaving,” you said. “Ssssssso, we’ll get out of your hair.”

You laughed and nodded, agreeing with him as Sirius steered you towards the couple and then past them. "See you in a bit, lovebirds," Sirius shouted over his shoulder.

The walk up to the house was clearly nervous.

"Thanks," you told him, embarrassed, "not sure how many people I can deal with seeing my tits before it's a problem."

"Don't mention it," he said. He didn't sound quite like himself. You bumped his shoulder with yours.

"Is… is everything okay?"

He came into himself a bit then, as if he were shaking off a layer of dust. "Can't believe Longbottom cockblocked me," he said, and winced. "Not that-"

"Who said he did?" you asked lowly.

He looked sideways at you and then down at his shoes. He smiled.

Sirius held his index finger against his lips, opening the front door to the Potter beach cottage as quietly as he could. You nodded, a picture in his jacket. Each time he remembered you were wearing nothing underneath he had to take a moment for himself and breathe a ragged inhale. He flicked his eyes to the evening sky before pushing open the door.

The floorboards were thankfully silent. The stairs didn't groan. He was halfway up with you flush to his back when James said, "Sirius?" from his room.

Sirius opened his mouth, unsure whether to answer. You shook your head despairingly.

He shut his mouth. You both stood silent on the stairs, staring at each other with his heart in his throat. James didn't call again, and so you finished creeping up the staircase and then across the landing. He ushered you into the room first and then followed behind, shutting the door. He stood there for a moment, listening.

When he turned back you were cleaning up the contents of your purse from the floor hurriedly. He peered down at you, the big light stretching his shadow and leaving you in darkness. You zipped your purse shut. Looking up at him from this angle, he could see a triangle of your chest. He offered his hand and you took it. Pulled to your feet you wobbled, wavered, looking at him like you wanted to touch him and weren't sure you were allowed.

He rested his hands on your shoulders in what he hoped was a placating gesture. Your smile was sweet and soft as he traversed down your sternum to fiddle with the zipper on his jacket, pulling it down an inch and then up half, down another inch.

"Sirius…" you whispered, reproach in your gaze.

He tilted his chin up proudly. "Sweetheart."

"Are you gonna mess with me all night?" you said, words tinged with anxiety. He laughed at your neediness.

"Maybe I will… I've been known to play with my food."

"Gonna eat me?"

"Gonna try," he affirmed, pulling the zip down steady.

You went to take the jacket off and he stopped you.

"Keep it on, won't you?" It didn't sound much like a question.

He didn't think about it - didn't second guess himself. He spread his palm flat over your breast and took your beaded nipple into his mouth, mouthing your breast in a heavy kiss. Your hand went to his hair so gently he almost felt sorry for being rough. Almost.

He moved to your other breast and felt his chest burn when you giggled breathlessly. He learned the curve of your waist under his calloused hand, kneading your softness.

He took your nipple between his teeth very gently and tugged. Although you made no sound, your hold in his hair tightened which told him everything he needed to know, abandoning your hip to pay special attention to your tits. He smiled at the goosebumps spreading over your body.

You made a sound like a hiccup. His dick jumped where it tented his shorts.

Determined to catch any similar sounds he returned to your perfect mouth, guiding your face to his. He pressed his other hand against his cock and prayed you didn't look down just yet.

You were eager and attentive, trying to get as close to him as you could, hands roving his chest. He walked you backwards into his bed, didn't think about the sand covering you both until it was ruining his sheets. He broke the kiss to retrieve his wand and you chased him. He allowed you a quick peck and then pulled his wand from his pocket, expunging the sand, locking the door and muffling the room from between your legs. Then he set aside the damned thing and pressed his knee between your thighs, pushing your head down into his pillow.

And how many times had he envisioned this?

You, warm and ethereal, laid out in his bed.

Himself, breathing fast and desperate and willing to do anything you wanted.

You pushed your cheek into his pillow shyly and grinned, squinting from how wide you were smiling. He smiled back, not as wide or openly, but hopefully enough.

"You sure you wanna do this?" he asked you quietly, running his hand over your hair.

"Mmm… you'll have to be more specific," you whispered, words so quiet he had to lean down to hear them.

He kissed your cheek, lingered there.

"Gonna make me say it?" he said. He was going for sexy, obviously, but with you affection tinged every word, had them rolling off of his tongue pleased and covered in sweetness like dark honey.

"I might do," you whispered, tone taking on a similar fond-sticky quality.

He ran his knuckle down from your temple to your jawline and then back up, touch soft. He flitted underneath your eye before flattening his hand to push his fingers underneath your ear, pad of his thumb poised over the very top of your cheekbone. He marvelled at how his hand fit perfectly in the space there like it had been made to rest against your skin.

"You're very quiet," you murmured, pupils wobbling.

"'M thinking," he murmured in turn, punctuating with a broad sweep of his thumb.

"'Bout what?"

His other hand smoothed over the soft flesh of your abdomen sinking down, down to the elastic of your bikini bottoms. They were tied in the same fashion as your top had been, and he delighted in the slow unravelling of the bows at each hip.

"'Bout how I'm gonna make a mess of you," he said, drawing a line down your now-bared centre. Your chest moved up sharply and didn't come back down until he'd found your entrance, already leaking slick. He spread wet up your front, circling your clit until your breath caught.

"There you are," he said, laughing.

"It's not funny," you protested breathlessly.

He pushed down a tad roughly, listening intently for your quiet moans. "It feels funny."

"That's my line."

He rolled his eyes, edging your entrance with the tip of his fingers. "Tell me if this feels funny, sweetheart."

He pushed his index finger past little resistance, already coated in your arousal and working more out of your warmth. You shuddered underneath him, reaching out to grab his hand for some comfort. He took your wrist in his other hand and held it away from your cunt. He checked your face to see how you were taking and felt a smugness like no other at the evident pleasure smudging your features, lips parted delicately and eyes shuttering closed with each thrust inward. He increased the pace and added his second finger, scissoring them inside you to spread you open.

He didn't intend on making you cum yet, really, having wanted to get you properly ready by murmuring sweet nothings and worse, promising things he wasn't sure he could give but was determined to try. "How's that feel, baby?"

"Good," you said shyly.

"Good? Just good?"

"Feels really good," you confirmed, panting at his uptick in speed and renewed pressure on your little bundle of nerves.

"Gonna make you feel so good," he promised, "gonna get you all messy, get you ready for my cock. That okay?"

"Yep," you said tightly.

Your legs were twitching - not a full shake but enough to tell exactly how it was going to go. He took his fingers from your cunt and pulled back further to push your knees up, spreading you wide in front of him. He used his left hand to stimulate your swollen clit and his right to finger fuck you in quick bursts.

It was wonderful to watch, your face swimming in pleasure and your eyes getting all wet and glassy, too timid to meet his gaze.

"Hey, pretty girl," he said, forcing you to look at him, "hey, baby. You look so fucking cute, yeah? Don't you?"

Your eyebrows creased, distracted by his attentions on your sensitive cunt.

"Tell me how you look," he ordered.

"Sirius…"

"Go on, tell me how good you look. I'll reward you, I promise."

You shook your head.

"You won't?" he paused attending your clit and took big, slow strokes, curling his fingers to drag down your walls. Your thighs wobbled.

"Just tell me, baby," he said, voice faux pleading, "tell me all about how you look and I'll make you cum."

You whimpered at the unfairness of it all and he felt a little sorry for you, but not enough to let you out of the deal.

"I look… nice." You bought into his game.

He grinned proudly, pressing his thumb back against your clit as though he might begin again, but didn't.

"C'mon, you can do better than that."

"I look cute."

He nodded appraisingly and started slow circles. "And what else?"

You stuttered over your words, stubborn in your own diffidence but desperate. "I look pretty."

"Pretty," he hummed like he was chewing it over. "You're more than pretty. Gonna look so fucking beautiful all covered in my cum too, baby, I promise you."

He was trying to relax himself as much as he was you. Trying to convince himself that fucking his best friend that he loved, loved unthinkingly as the pumping of blood in his veins, the thrumming of his magic beneath his skin, was the right path. And what did people say? Sometimes the easiest path was the path of least resistance? He couldn't resist you, he knew that much. So, selfishly, he made you cum. Selfishly, he cooed as you moaned. Selfishly, he spread his hand across your trembling tummy. Maybe it was the wrong decision, but Sirius Black fancied himself a selfish man, and so he was going to fuck you silly, should you allow him.

You were recuperating, blinking bashfully, wetting your bitten lips. He leaned over you to push his hands behind your shoulders and lift you into a sitting position, stealing a quick kiss. When he broke it you looked dazed as ever.

"You okay?" he asked.

Your dazed expression cleared with his voice. You nodded, catching your breath with your hand pressed to your cunt. He laughed madly when you touched yourself and jumped, ticklish.

You glared at him.

"Don't be like that," he chastised, taking both of your hands into his, tugging your arms towards him.

You squeezed his fingers likely without thought and climbed up onto your knees, almost as tall as him, "I'm not being like anything," you said, climbing up into his lap, wet pussy sliding against his aching, clothed cock, knees either side of his thighs.

He pulled your arms around his neck to relieve his hands and push down his shorts, freeing his cock. He pumped, feeling your arms tighten as you spotted his length.

"Ah," you said weakly.

"You ready?" he asked, guiding his cock underneath you to tease your hole, gathering wetness to palm over his length.

You didn't answer, instead lowering yourself onto his cock slowly. He kissed your shoulder, tasted the salt of the sea on your skin as you stretched around him, gasps like a sweet song in his ears. Hands on your hips to alleviate the effort it took for you to hold yourself upright, he steered you up and down until you were confident enough to do it yourself. You were slow, and he wouldn't rush you, but fuck if he didn't want to lay you out flat and ruin you, pound into you until you were a wet-eyed mess. Still, you worked his cock, moaning as the stretch turned to indiscriminate pleasure.

He grabbed your neck, not rough enough to hurt but certainly not gently, straightening your head up to meet his gaze, though the sight of you watching his cock spread you open was tantalising, mouth a small o-shape.

"Taking me so well," he praised.

You tried not to show how his words affected you. He was determined to make you, fucking up into you as you came down, relishing in the startled delight clouding your face.

"How's my pretty girl feeling?" He followed your hips with his own, dragging his cock against your walls. "How's my pretty pussy, all full?"

You looked like you might burst into tears and dug your face into the side of his neck, tightening your arms. He took this in stride and kissed the top of your head before grabbing a hold of your hips and fucking fast into your heat, moaning at the feeling of your cunt contracting around his throbbing dick.

"Yeah, you know, don't you? This cunt," he said into your hair, "this cunt's all mine now."

You'd gone so quiet he worried for a split second he'd gone too far, until he felt your lips at his neck, mouthing. He didn't have to see you to know what you'd said soundlessly.

All yours.

His fault for goading you, he realised, groaning so raggedly he felt his chest burn. He fucked up into you until he thought even a muffliato wasn't enough enough cover the sounds you were making, unrestrained and half-sobbing in his lap.

He slowed, let you drop so you were seated with his cock inside you as deep as it could go, which was a different agony, and pulled your face from the crook of his neck.

"Awww," he sympathised, rolling his hips as he wiped the tears from your face. "You're okay."

You nodded, bringing a hand up to wipe your face yourself, hands half covered by the sleeve of his jacket.

"It's not too much, is it?" he asked, bringing his hand to the small of your back, pushing leather into your skin and leaning back to really focus on finding your sweet spot.

You pouted jokingly as if to say what do you think? and then laughed, the movement prompting little flecks of water to jump off of your lashes. It was a sight he thought he would remember for the rest of his life, your pleasure driven tears and your cock drunk laugh, tits half sheltered by his old leather jacket.

You took his leaning back as an opportunity, spreading your fingers against the trail of hair at the bottom of his stomach to encourage his back flat onto the mattress. He laid down curiously, head close enough to the edge of the bed that his hair draped over the end. You anchored yourself to his tummy and didn't ride him so much as you squirmed, the head of his cock rubbing against your sweet spot, goosebumps breaking out across your body. You whined, pleading sounds that had him probing your clit, searching for your second climax. You protested his actions, grabbing his wrist and holding it to his breastbone, leaning down so your cunt was flush with his crotch, pelvis' sliding into one another bruisingly as you grinded, faces inching closer and closer as the sensation weakened your resolve to be in charge. He felt his own resolve weakening in turn.

Escaping your clutches he pulled your chest flush to his with only the head of his dick inside you, to which you grumbled, rocking down. He frowned himself and wrapped one arm under your armpit and over your shoulder blades, the other across your back.

"Don't do me in," he blurted, steadying your movements.

You raised your eyebrows at his panic amusedly. "You gonna cum in me, lover?" you asked teasingly.

He kissed the skin left of your mouth, strokes haltingly slow. "Don't do me in," he restated, softer. "Please."

Your lips parted as he dug into your soft spot, mouthing your cheek before tucking you into his front, hugging you tenderly as he opened you up slowly with his cock. He sped up, testing what he could handle and savouring your keens.

The sound of your whimpering was his last straw, pulling out of you quickly, cock throbbing in his hand. You searched for his mouth and kissed him, once and then twice, chaste and slow and loving kisses that made him want to serve you up starlight on a silver platter.

Then you climbed off of him. He let you go reluctantly, watching as you settled in a W-shape near his pillows, breathing hard and neatening up his jacket so your tits were fully out.

"Do your worst," you told him.

He blinked, pushing up onto his elbows, cock twitching at the skin under his belly button.

"What?"

"'Gonna look beautiful covered in my cum,'" you quoted him, something bright in your eyes.

He crawled over to your quivering body, hand already milking his cock. He kneeled so he was hovering over you and you leaned back into his pillows, sweaty and rugged. He thought you looked the prettiest he'd ever seen you, hands tugging roughly at his cock, lubed by your slick.

"You're beautiful," you whispered gingerly, eyes skipping up his chest to alight on his mouth, his nose, his eyes. You smiled, eyes heavy.

He came down your front, pearlescence dripping down the swollen curve of your breasts and gathering at the slade of your chest, white rivulets that shone in the golden sundown. He'd barely finished when he was kissing you passionately, trying to convey his thoughts with his rough hand on your silken face, his undue mouth, trying to push the depths of his devotion into his soothing fingertips beneath your eye.

He broke the kiss begrudgingly, struck with an idea.

"Where's your camera?" he asked, forehead resting on yours.

"Huh?"

"Let me take a picture of you like this."

You didn't need much convincing, a beatific beam dancing across your kiss red lips. He scrubbed his hand down your cheek before he hastily pulled his shorts up and retrieved the camera from where you pointed, messing with buttons he didn't hope to understand until the camera was blinking and aimed at your smiling face. He zoomed out just enough to catch his jacket and your messy chest in the photograph.

"Pretty," he said, more to himself than you. Your chest heaved with his praise. "Say cheese, lovely girl."

You shot up a peace sign and he chuckled so suddenly he thought he'd never breathe right again.

thank you for reading!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

read part two here

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kirascottage · 3 years

Note

im awful at sending requests BUT james potter & reader playing quidditch, reader actually wins the game but gives james a reward nonetheless😋

good girls get rewards

james potter x f. reader

summary: james goes down on you after you win a quidditch match.

word count: 1.7k

warnings: slytherin!reader, past rivals to lovers mention, established relationship, dom/sub relations, pet names (baby, good girl), praise, fem!receiving oral, swearing, kissing, mentions of drugs and alcohol, hickeys/marking

gia’s notes; so u see i’m actually dumb and i misread this so james goes down on the reader rather than vice versa 😭😭

And there the rivalry had begun, pursued and come to sufficient rest. The Quidditch pitch. A regular Thursday afternoon with the sun hanging lazily in the unclouded sky whilst variations of florescent’s scorned the air quick enough to give students cheering whiplash. Emerald and Scarlet hues circled each other as if it was an active predator and its preferred prey.

Your visage was tainted with blurs of colour as your rear sat upon the uncomfortable length of ebony wood, your attention should have been diverted on the aged Quaffle in Dorcas Meadowes palm merely awaiting an intervention as she had passed it to James, but with no prevail as your distraction hovered just meters away.

James was your distraction.

No time to adjust his optics, James had done a complete double-take close to the hoop where a shot was in order; but Slytherin’s had played quite differently than Gryffindors, Regulus Black caught the opportunity as well as the Quaffle earning an extra ten points to Slytherin.

Dorcas scowled as Marlene Mckinnon had flashed the ivory pigments in her eyes from annoyance of the boy but nevertheless, continued the match beating away Bludgers from her teammates.

Marius Pucey was the most intelligent of the bunch, a cluster of gold flashing in front of his irises, any distraction of his girlfriend Annalise cheering for him in the crowd was all a retaining blur as William Mclgaggen had been foolish enough to shoot a wave at two Gryffindor girls in the bleachers, rather than paying attention to the hovering golden ball that usually got on everyone’s last nerve.

With a quick grasp at the chromatic sphere, Marius had flung his arm into the air as a sign of victory as Slytherin had won the game against Gryffindor. Most Gryffindor’s flew down to the viridescent field with a permanent scowl twisted on their faces. The Gryffindor Chaser had a simpering look etched across his features as he strut closer to the Emerald team.

“James Potter—“ You flung your hand in front of his abdomen, eagerly awaiting a congratulatory handshake. “—Good game.” He chuckled at your formalities, grasping at your hand and gently bobbing it a few times before your legs suddenly were surprisingly hauled closer to the brunet.

His abdomen adjacent to yours, any gap between you almost ridden. He whispered lowly as his teammates had made their way back to the locker room, “You did win after all and good girls deserve rewards, don’t they?” The fan of his ragged breath against your ear had the muscle in your chest palpitating feverishly before any contact with him was diminished and his body was slowly strutting away leaving you with a wink.

“Fuck me.” With a quick whisper under your breath in anticipation, your calves quickly tugged their way to the castle in an effort to catch up with the rest of the Slytherins as the celebration was quick to begin.

Strutting down the elder stairs of the common room, flashing Emerald strobe lights had taken effect and the common room had begun to fill with students from the remaining houses. It would’ve been completely inaccurate to admit a Slytherin party was dreadful to participate in.

The two eldest Slytherins had always whispered a Muffilato charm earlier in the day, and the wealthiest of the Slytherin house had displayed out the Firewhisky and whatever herb they had exchanged from a Hufflepuff on various tables usually utilized for academic purposes.

Soon, Ravenclaws, Hufflepuffs even Gryffindors had begun to enjoy themselves, and the infamous Gryffindor Chaser had made his grand appearance.

James’ lips quirked up with a mischievous glint in his eye, his Slytherin basking in her win amongst classmates. It was no secret to the school of the outer-house relationship as Snape had caught you exchanging spit in the Corridor one memorable evening as he was typically doing Prefect rounds.

Still, they dwelled as to how a Slytherin and a Gryffindor could adequately maintain a healthy and non-competitive relationship.

Your vocal cords collided in a successful attempt to clear your throat, excusing yourself from Theresa Zabini and forging a path towards the portrait hole where James had remained with one of his legs propped behind the other and his arms curled into one another.

“Staring? Y’know it’s rude to stare.” Your familiar voice came out in a dramatic chastise as your words were portrayed as strict like a mother disciplining her child. He chuckled at the comment with a vertical shake in his head, the tendrils clung to his cranium inevitably following as he moved.

“What can I say, beautiful girls, they do things to me.”

“Oh, so there’s multiple now?” He laughed at your ridiculing comment as well as the humorous glow formulating in your features, his hands extending out from his crossed arms and his palms filled with the curvature of your waist. His head tilting in derision as your heaving breaths had heavily increased by the proximity. “I believe it was claimed that you had a reward for me.”

His teeth flashed at your recollection, his tongue poking through his cheek as his eyes steering left before his Cerulean blue was boring into your irises. “Rewards requiring leaving. You sure you wanna leave yet? You’ve barely basked in the win.”

Your eyebrow quirked for a moment and your hands curled around his shoulders, deliberating in your mind before providing him an answer. “Don’t really care about the recognition, to be honest.” You shook your head similarly how he did moments before, his face comforting in confusion when you withdrew your body from his, diminishing all contact before extending your hand out.

“So, take me to where I await, James.” The baritone of his chuckle overpowering your own as his hand engulfed your palm, steering through the intoxicated students till you were met with the clean sight of your dormitory.

“Not really sure if I’m daft, but I don’t see anything.” With a confused chuckle, your eyes drift around the room seeing as it was in the identical condition you had left it in prior. “You don’t see need to see it.” His hand hauling you into the darkroom, only lit by the Lincoln green fireplace situated in the middle of the wall; the recurrent perks of being a Prefect.

His tongue peeking out from his lips to dampen the flesh beneath it before the caps of his teeth had pulled at the plump cushion.

He physically manipulated you in any way you earnestly desired, his psyche formulating on how to pleasure you next. Your legs now perched on the coverlet and your hands curved around your knees anticipating his next move. “And you already know what to do, good girl, baby.” He praised.

A searing warmth came to compose in your cheeks, something no doubt James could decipher as his hands now cupped the flesh. You leaned in his calloused palms, his knees creating indentations on the Pearl coverlet as you looked ascent into his deliberating features.

The cushion of his lips diverged against your own, instantly recognizing the faux taste of strawberry on his tongue as your teeth clashed till you were completely submissive to the boy.

An audible noise of surprise rang through his eardrums, seeing as your spine was adjacent to the bedspread with the flimsy material of your Onyx skirt was hiked near your hips. His fingers danced around the cerise sheet of lace clad to your navel, his fingers completely abandoning the Onyx fabric to the floor.

“James,” Your voice came out in a gasp when the pad of his thumb came in contact with the dampening material, a cause of friction erupting as his fingers began to rid you of frail material. “My good girl. All ready for me, are you?” His inquiry rather a ridicule at your arousal, rather than a question, nonetheless you nodded rapidly leaving James with a raised brow.

He wanted more.

“Yes! All—” You paused with an anticipating gulp trapped in your throat, “—All for you.” He was satisfied with your faint respondence. Manipulating your limbs in his grasp, he gently pried open your legs as his chest hovered above the bed beneath your thighs. His nimble fingers gliding through your folds, emitting a slight gasp at the contact. “So sensitive.” He murmured to himself with a satisfied grin at the slight frolic in your body, his tendrils dancing across your viewpoint whilst the flexed tendon of your thighs had been lazily thrown over the rippling muscles of his shoulders.

His tongue came into junction with the swollen bud, circling the soft lingua around your clit. His face in close proximity with your cunt, a smile on his lips pressed into your flesh causing varying trails of fire to glide through your bloodstream. In retaliation, your deft fingers carded through his locks at his decree of pleasure for you. His lips paused and the narrow tip of his nose prodded at the smooth flesh of your inner thigh.

James’ lips began closing around the skin, suckling small auburn and vermillion hues into your skin. His lips turned back to your cunt after imprinting various pigmentations on the complexion of your skin, his marks.

“James, please. More—” Your lips releasing languid moans as the leisure pleasure was persuading you into lethargy.

His lips returning his proper attention to your swollen button, his tongue slow, on a sensual endeavour for your evident pleasure. James’ tongue exploring the barren depths of your cunt like it was an implorable mission.

The breathily whimpers escaping your trachea never ceased, your lungs only inflating causing a releasing string of moans to depart radically from your lips as his teeth nipped at your swollen bud. His lips continuing with his lewd fantasy, the adamant shake in your nearing release was prominent against the flexing muscles in his backside clad in an Ivory T-Shirt.

“Doing so well for me, love.” The coarse baritone vibrated against your swollen flesh only etching you further, the only audible response offered was a husked moan.

After a few more flicks of his tongue electricity was wrapping around your spine in a secure hold, an explosion of shockwaves broiling in your abdomen as he worked you off with his tongue. The only physical attribute you could contribute to was tugging at his brunet locks as your visage bleared into a drunken euphoria.

James had crawled over the depths of your torso, his Cerulean irises drinking in your dilated pupils and breathless state. “My good girl, did so well f’me.” He eulogized, instantly recognizing your lethargic nod. “Your good girl, Jamie.”

taglist: @miiamour @shadesofvelma @acosmis-t @emmaev @lesbiansammyy @kaqua @bugswrld @anything-forourmoony @zzzfour @sprucewoodlover

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steelycunt · 2 years

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Number 3 for the mini fic if you’re interested!

hi! sooo sorry anon i fucking SUCK but i am finishing these now!! and to make up for it this accidentally became over 1k long, so!! here u are im sorry im sorry <3

3. things you said too quietly

“Right!” Marlene calls. Her sing-song voice tumbles in from the living room, splitting through a shimmering haze of cigarette smoke and sweet, liquor-soaked breath: “Not long now, everyone!”

A swell of glittering, slurred cheers rear up to meet her, previously scattered conversations mingling into one, toothy roar of noise. “NINETEEN SEVENTY-FUCKIN’-NINE!” somebody else shrieks back. Everybody sounds strangled, strangely desperate; you’d think the world was ending at midnight, fireworks biting at the sky like asteroids.

Bottles of spirits clutter the kitchen countertops, half-full and garishly colourful. They remind Sirius of a menagerie of exotic birds, though that might just be because he’s vaguely drunk, himself. Either way, he grins, nudges his elbow into Remus’ side. Bony, scrawny thing he is.

“Hear that, Moons?” he drawls. “Nineteen seventy-fuckin’-nine.”

Remus smiles, lopsided. A scabbed-over scar on his cheek is warped by the pit of his dimple. “Mm, quite. I’m impressed that anyone’s still sober enough to keep track.”

Elsewhere, as though in rebuttal, Gudbuy T’Jane is cranked up to ever more obnoxious levels. Remus’ lovely, large nose screws up a little, and—maybe Sirius is more than vaguely drunk, actually, considering the sharp, crackling lurch in his stomach. He wets his lips. I say, Slade yell hoarsely, you’re so young! You’re so young!

Sirius flicks his hair back. When he tips his head back down, the kitchen appears slightly skewed. His mouth feels tacky, gritty with sugar. He asks Remus, “any predictions for the year, then?”

A girl wearing green platform heels stumbles into the kitchen. She snatches up a tall bottle of vivid blue something-or-other, her iridescent nail polish flashing, and then marches back into the sweaty buzz of Marlene and Dorcas’ living room with all the determination of a soldier returning to battle.

They both watch her leave, and then Remus looks back at him, considering his earlier question. “Well. Judging from the strikes,” he says, “I predict that the muggles might get rid of Callaghan, actually.”

“Ah, right.” Sirius nods. “Yeah, that was my fault, I should’ve clarified—I meant, you know, do you have any predictions about things that are interesting, Moons?”

Remus rolls his eyes: “not all of us only read newspapers for the crossword, Padfoot. Did you know? There’s this whole section, see—after the nice shapes and colours—where people write all about the current goings-on—the news, if you will—”

“Oh, fuck, alright. Alright, you prick.” Sirius shakes his head, feigning exasperation. “How about—I predict that you’ll still be an intolerable git in seventy-nine, hm?”

Remus shrugs, folds his arms over his dubiously orange jumper (tonight, he’s paired it with faded stone-grey corduroys; is there any chance at all, Moons, Sirius had teased, that your new year’s resolution is to burn the contents of your wardrobe?). “The odds do look good,” he admits.

They both snicker quietly at that, arms pressed against each other as they stand side by side. Sirius flicks his tongue over his lip ring. There’s a smear of glitter beneath Remus’ ear, left over from hugging Lily at the start of the night. It looks entirely absurd, there, against his freckles and his wool and his dusty brown curls.

If the world really were ending, Sirius thinks, he’d probably still want to be here, right now, in the kitchen.

Wordlessly, Remus bumps his hand against Sirius’, fingers fumbling clumsily over his palm. In seventh year, Sirius’ Muggle Studies professor explained what a good conductor of electricity the human body is—something to do with water content, or whatever it was. Point is, in this moment, Sirius is quite sure he believes it, is quite sure he can feel the current climbing frantically up the length of his arm.

Remus shifts so that they’re facing each other, though his eyes stay fixed somewhere around Sirius’ bare collarbone, blinking quickly. Sirius frowns, catches himself, which is strange, since he hadn’t tripped in the first place. In the living room, the party shouts, “five!”

“Listen, Sirius, I need to—” Remus’ voice is very close. He swallows, and his throat jerks. The sterile, glaring kitchen lights make him look delicate, and jittery; they press bleach-white fingers into the sides of Sirius’ skull, prodding around for the start of a headache. “Four!”

The sight of Remus like this, so obviously, inexplicably nervous, is probably the only thing in the world that’d give Sirius the confidence to take his hand properly, squeeze it. “You alright, Remus?”

“Three!”

And Remus mumbles, “yeah,”, but he’s tapping his thumb erratically against the jutting bone of Sirius’ wrist, “yeah, I just—shit—don’t know why I thought this was—”

“Two!”

“—A good idea, but I s’pose I’m saying it now, so—”

“One!”

“—Sirius, I think I’m in lo—”

“HAPPY NEW YEAR, YOU TOSSERS!”

Just like that: the rest of Remus’ confession—whatever it is, whatever Sirius is desperate to believe it was going to be—is trampled by James’ shout; he barrels into Sirius, brakes cut, elbow sending a bottle of Advocaat hurtling towards the linoleum. Remus jumps backwards to avoid the wreckage—either the yellow puddle of glass shards and liqueur, or the tangled, eight-limbed, six-eyed Potter-Black monster—and has to wrench his hand from Sirius’ grasp in the process.

“Happy New Year!” James cries again, just to drive the message home. His eyes are bright and wide beneath his smudged lenses, gleefully oblivious to the Advocaat spattered thickly up the kitchen cabinets. He jostles Sirius, arm hurled around his shoulders. “Seven—seventy-nine, boys! Right fuckin’ on, hey! Hey!”

“Steady on, Prongs, you pillock.” Sirius steers James away, propping him up against the fridge as he hums a loud, loose rendition of Auld Lang Syne to himself. “Oh, thank fuck Evans’ is the one who’s got to sort you out now…”

“I ought to go and find her,” Remus agrees. In the chaos of James’ entrance, Sirius had forgotten what he’d interrupted, until now. He spins wildly as Remus weaves his way towards the doorway, slouching. His head is lowered.

Abandoning James, Sirius starts after him: “Moons, no, wait! Hang on, you didn’t—” he snags the sleeve of Remus’ jumper, tugs. Remus’ cheeks are pink, though he’s barely had anything to drink at all.

“Hang on, you didn’t, uh…I didn’t hear that last part. I didn’t—what were you about to say, before?”

“Huh?” Remus rubs a hand over the back of his neck, his gaze still evasive. “Oh—you didn’t…you didn’t hear,” he repeats, quiet, seemingly more to himself. His face relaxes. “You didn’t hear. Er, it was—nothing.”

Behind them, James stops humming in order to make a wet retching sound. Sirius does not dare turn around to look. Remus smiles: it’s weak, and there’s no dimple this time.

“It was just—Happy New Year, Sirius,” he says softly. “That’s…that’s all I wanted to say.”

#r/s #give it up for JAMES POTTER! COCKBLOCK OF THE CENTURY EVERYONE! mwah my sweet boy he knows not what he does xx #also! who says studying politics is useless! it provides invaluable historical political context for fanfiction writing!!#my fic #ask game #ridi drabbles

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fruitcoops · 3 years

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Hey Eve how are you doing I hope you're having a good day. Could you possibly if you want to make a fic like after the disownment fic and there's an interview with Sirius, Remus or (or the lions) on how they felt and there reactions and stuff only if you want to ofc I hope you are having a good day

This isn't a social media fic, but it does include include this prompt and was combined with an ask for Sirius having a hard time in the wake of a breakdown because he was doing so well before. Please pay attention to the TWs and let me know if I missed any. SW credit goes to @lumosinlove <3

TW child abuse (past), angst, past trauma, mentions of going to therapy, and feeling overwhelmed

The studio cameras hadn’t seemed scary in a long, long time. Sirius stared at the white floor, toying with his ring and trying not to run screaming from the building; this is for them, he reminded himself. For everyone like me who never had someone speak up for them. The metal folding chair was cold under him.

“Sirius?” There was no hint of teasing in Marlene’s voice. “Are you ready?”

He had already saved himself and Regulus. Now it was time for the rest of them. “Oui.”

“Rolling in three, two, one…”

“My name is Sirius Black,” he said, channeling all the strength and control he could manage into his voice as he straightened up. “I’m 27 years old, the center and captain for the Gryffindor Lions hockey team, and a Stanley Cup champion.” He took a breath. “And I grew up in an abusive home. Last week, my biological parents officially disowned me for refusing to go back into the closet and under their control. It wasn’t dramatic. There was no media present. There was a lot of paperwork.

“But I’m not here to talk about that.” He swallowed, and felt some of his confidence return. Behind the camera, Marlene gave him an encouraging look with a shine in her eyes. “I’m here to talk to everyone else in my situation and let you know that you’re not alone. You can get out of there, and you can be the freest version of yourself. For the next month, 1/12 of all proceeds from Lions tickets will go to charities supporting abuse survivors and those currently living in abusive situations. My story is not the only one. We can make a difference.”

----------------

Sirius laid on his back on the lobby couch, letting “Radio Gaga” thump in his ears and drown out the tremors in his body. He had never said it publicly before—as far as the rest of the hockey world knew, his family was only rumored to be strict. He had been hesitant to do the video at first despite the tsunami of questions flooding their social media, and it wasn’t until Marlene suggested the charity aspect that he agreed.

Sirius didn’t like press. He liked it even less when it was poking around in his past, and when he had to support it.

The song ended and he paused the music, listening to his own breathing and steady pulse. You’re okay. You’re done. You made it through. He didn’t feel okay.

“—proud of him,” someone was saying inside the studio. Remus. “It was a complicated and painful thing to work through, but he never wavered from what he wanted and what was best for him.”

Six of his other teammates would speak, supporting the charity with a quick mention of their own feelings in case any assholes on the internet got bright ideas about speaking for them and their feelings on Sirius’ disownment. It was insane what people thought they found by digging through interviews.

“Hey, baby.” Sirius opened his eyes; above him, Remus was leaning over the armrest of the couch with a tired smile. He kissed Sirius’ forehead, then his nose, then his lips. “Ready to go home?”

“Don’t we have to stay until the end?”

“Marlene said she had everything she needed from us.”

Sirius blew out a slow breath and stood, wrapping his arms around Remus on instinct. “This feels like it’s going to go badly.”

“I don’t think it will,” Remus said quietly, rubbing up and down his spine. “I think it’s going to help a lot of people, and I hope it means we stop getting nosy comments now that you’ve answered the big questions and made it clear that’s the end.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

They walked to the car in relative silence, hand-in-hand; Remus took the keys without a word, and relief washed over Sirius in a cool breeze. He didn’t feel grounded enough to drive safely. At the moment, he wasn’t sure he ever would. The whole world was hazy outside the passenger window, blurring the city he loved so much into smudges of colors—Remus was a presence next to him, but what Sirius wanted more than anything was some hot chocolate and a long, long nap.

“I don’t feel good,” he said, hardly above a whisper.

Remus glanced at him out of the corner of his eye as he drove. “Do I need to pull over?”

“No, I just…” He sighed. “I thought I would feel better after getting this off my chest and helping people. I feel bad.”

“Can you eat?” He nodded. “I’ll make some soup when we get home if you want to lay down for a bit.”

Sirius’ eyes burned. “Sounds good.”

“Hey, baby, it’s okay,” Remus soothed, reaching one hand down to close around the one Sirius kept on his thigh as Sirius sniffled and shook with the effort of keeping in his tears. “It’s okay. You can call Marlene and ask her not to publish the video. That’s in your rights, you don’t have to—”

“No,” Sirius choked out, wiping his tears away with the back of his wrist. “It has to happen. People have to know that they can help. I—I just—I don’t know how to feel and so everything is happening at once.”

Nobody had taught Sirius how to handle Feelings-with-a-capital-f until Dumo; suddenly, he felt like all that hard work was being undone in one fell swoop. He kept ahold of Remus’ hand and let the tears slide down his cheeks as he breathed through it, keeping both feet firmly planted in some semblance of control. Remus parked the car and turned to him without unbuckling his seatbelt. “Do you want to go inside, or should we drive for a bit?”

“I really want to go to bed.”

“How can I help?” Remus laced their fingers together again and Sirius squeezed his eyes shut. “You really don’t seem alright, love.”

“I’m not, and I don’t know how to fix it.” The words were broken glass in his throat. “I was doing so good. I don’t know how to go back.”

“Oh, baby,” Remus murmured, taking his seatbelt off to kiss Sirius’ temple. “Let’s go inside, yeah? You’ll be more comfortable there.”

Sirius nodded mutely, still pressing his lips together to stifle any sounds that tried to come out. It always seemed like when he started to cry, he couldn’t stop—whether that was a function of never crying for the majority of his life, he didn’t know, but it always felt horrible. No mistakes, his mother had told him. The video felt like a mistake. Still, he knew he couldn’t ask them to take it down. There were people that needed help, and he couldn’t let his childhood hide in the shadows anymore.

Remus turned as if to hug him when the door closed behind them, but Sirius slipped past and headed straight for the stairs. Sweatpants, hoodie, soup, blanket, talk. Talk, talk, talk until you can’t stop. Then sleep. He heard Remus moving around in the kitchen as he stripped down and dug his softest sweatpants out of the drawer, followed by Remus’ most worn-down and oversized Wisconsin hoodie that he always wore when he didn’t feel well. Sirius buried his nose in the neckline and inhaled deeply; the familiar scent soothed the rush of blood in his ears.

He didn’t bother with socks and made a beeline for the couch, wrapping himself in the afghan blanket one of Hope’s friends had crocheted for their wedding. Hope had kept it in the Lupin house so she wouldn’t forget to bring it with her, and it smelled like them, too. It smelled like safety and a happy house and healthy childhoods.

Another tear slipped out when Remus set down some water and the soup—Campbell’s chicken noodle, can’t go wrong—and Sirius curled up against the armrest to make room. “I need to talk to you,” he said. “I need to talk to you.”

The cushions dipped as Remus sat next to him and crossed his legs. “About what?”

“Everything.” His voice broke. “The way I grew up, everything about it. I—Re, I never lied to you, I promise. I just didn’t talk about it because I didn’t want to scare you, but I have to be honest with you.”

“…alright.”

Sirius took a shaky breath; his mouth was dry, and salty at the edges. “My parents—my parents hit me when I wasn’t good enough, and nothing was ever good enough unless I could do it again, and again, and again—”

“Sirius—”

“—and I thought everyone on my team didn’t get dinner if they didn’t get a goal and—”

“Stop—”

“—and Regulus and I, it was like we couldn’t breathe in that house with them scripting every move—”

“Sirius.” Remus’ hand covered his mouth and Sirius closed his eyes as a sob ripped free, but didn’t fight it. “Sirius, stop, please.”

“I have to tell you,” he said hoarsely, trembling from head to toe. “I have to be honest with you.”

“I love you, and I’m glad you can talk to me, but I’m not the person you have to tell.” Remus’ voice was thick with tears. “Being honest with me doesn’t mean telling me every detail, please, please don’t do that.”

“I couldn’t make mistakes,” he blubbered, leaning into Remus. “What kind of fucking freak tells a child they can’t make mistakes?”

Remus shushed him softly, running a hand through the hair at the nape of his neck as he went boneless into Remus’ chest. He could feel the hitching breaths under his face and regret reared up, but he felt so empty. There was so much more he could tell Remus and nothing he could say. “I love you,” Remus began, sniffling slightly. “I love you so much, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Because I love you, I’m going to tell you that I am not the person you need to tell all this to right now. You should talk to someone who knows how to help, like Heather.”

“I’m sorry,” Sirius whispered.

“No, I understand.” A kiss pressed against the top of his head. “And I’m not upset at you. Both our emotions are running really high. I just—this isn’t blaming you or to make you feel bad, but it hurts to hear all the horrible things that happened to you. I already wish I could have stopped it before it happened, but hearing you say it is a lot worse than thinking about it and I wasn’t ready to hear everything.”

“That’s not everything.”

“I know.” Remus’ voice cracked. “I know, and that’s the worst part. This video was a bad idea, I should call—”

“No, no, don’t do that.” Sirius caught his wrist as he reached for the phone. “The video isn’t the problem. It will help people. It’s just hard for me to talk about it without getting overwhelmed.”

Remus hesitated, but left the phone alone and hugged Sirius close again. “I’m here.”

“I know.”

“And I’m not gonna leave.” His chest rose and fell. “But—but if you need to tell me things, not just today, please give me fair warning first.”

“I will,” Sirius promised. They sat quietly for a moment before he sat up and pulled the soup bowl into his lap, letting the steam roll over his face. “Mon dieu, I was doing so good before this. It’s been the best two years and now…”

“Now it’s going to be better,” Remus filled in when he trailed off. A slender hand tucked his hair behind his ear. “It’s going to be better, Sirius. For you, and for lots of other people that you’re helping. But this is the hard part.”

“This is the really, really hard part,” he agreed, taking a sip of broth. It was the perfect temperature. “Thank you.”

“It’s just soup.”

“No, for everything. Everything you’ve done for me.” he rested his head on Remus’ shoulder, then left a lingering kiss on his cheek. “I love you more than I can say.”

A wry smile tilted the side of Remus’ mouth up. “In English or French?”

“Both,” Sirius half-laughed. “Both, I promise. I’m going to finish this, and then can we take a nap?”

“That sounds perfect. Make sure to drink your water, too.”

It would not be an easy evening, or an easy night, or an easy anything when the video came out. But he would work through it, and he would remember what he had learned from his family and his friends to move past the roadblocks his childhood always created. He would call Regulus, they would cry together, and they would be okay. He would be okay.

#sirius black #remus lupin #coops #marlene mckinnon #vaincre #sweater weather #my fic #fanfic #interview #lumosinlove #disownment #child abuse #overwhelmed #hurt/ comfort #angst

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