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#excuse typos I am sick
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I am so excited! I finished one of my zine pieces (it is a continuation of a Prussia/Prussia fic universe that my friend and I have been Rping for over 6 years) and I’m starting in on my other zine piece focusing on Sailor Moon, kawaii culture, and nyo!Japan! In the coming weeks, I’ll post little bits here and there of my Pru/Pru fic. And link to the first one I did that my partner got to read first and add anything I may have missed in the characterization of their Prussia!
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starrystevie · 11 months
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Happy (early) birthday Bee!! Let’s roll for steddie… shop au… 80’s? Full reign on everything else you wanna go for 💕
thank you thank you!! so this may be a stretch for a shop au but i thought it was kind of fitting for a little bit of pre-s4 steddie. hope you like it! <3
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ship: steddie | trope: shop au | era: 1980s | length: 300-500
eddie can think of at least a million other places he'd rather be than at work. work meant screaming kids and bitchy moms and douchebag lifeguards that took advantage of the one-free-snack-a-day rule. his uniform is polyester, scratchy and hot in the indiana summer heat and the breeze from the fan in the corner of the concession stand doesn't help much. "munson!" and then there's also the added problem of having to work with his lifetime crush, steve harrington. eddie rolls his eyes and lets his hands fall onto his hips as steve rounds the corner. he's dripping wet and it's not in that wet dog kind of way, more in the way that he looks like he belongs on those smutty books the mom book club brings to the pool. he flicks his hair out of his face, smile creasing up his cheeks, and eddie forces himself to look away so he won't blush too hard. "you better put on some sunscreen, dude," steve says as he skids to a stop in front of the stand. his arms cross over his chest and eddie lets himself have one peak at the motion before looking away once more. "you look a little sun burnt on your face…" as steve leans over the counter to peer closer, eddie runs a hand over his face and does a dramatic spin to grab the hot dog tongs off the back counter. when he spins back around, he sees steve with his eyebrows furrowed, drops of overly chlorinated water dripping off of his sun-kissed skin and glistening in the golden sunshine and he watches as one drop traces through his chest hair and lower and- "you dehydrated or something?" steve's voice sounds gentle, like he genuinely wants to know if eddie is getting enough water and if he's being honest, no he isn't. he could melt at the sound of steve's voice, at the way his eyes flick over eddie like he's looking for something wrong, at the way he always stops by right when he knows eddie's going on break so they can take a smoke break together behind the tool shed. "i'm fine," eddie barks out, startling steve and tina who's working the soft serve machine. "you ready?" steve grins and takes the hot dog eddie offers to him with practiced ease, sliding by the condiment stand to get a packet of ketchup that they both know eddie will give him grief over. the walk to the shed is quiet as usual. it's not until they've both lit up and started in on their hot dogs that steve breaks the silence. "what are you gonna do once summer's over?" he asks, voice muffled with a massive bite of hot dog. eddie shrugs and is about to give steve shit for talking with his mouth full but then looks up and sees it. there's a drop of ketchup on steve's cheek and he doesn't think, doesn't process what he's doing, before his hand shoots up and wipes it away with a gentle finger. "oh." steve sounds as surprised as eddie feels. they both look between each other's face and eddie's finger which is still halfway in the air covered in ketchup. it's steve's turn to blush, pink flushing up from his chest to the tips of his ears and eddie smirks at him in return. "better be careful, steve," he taunts, and in a daring move he won't be able to do again, rubs the ketchup onto the bottom of steve's trunks. "looks like you're getting a little sunburnt if that blush is anything to go off of." steve scowls and puffs a little too harshly at his cigarette as eddie cackles. maybe eddie doesn't hate working there as much as he thought he did, not if it means seeing steve harrington blush.
roll for prompts: accepting!
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yooniesim · 1 year
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Only reinstalled the hell app to post this bc I didn't have enough time to say everything I wanted to in my last posts. I'm not checking notifs or messages. I haven't seen anything posted on the last few posts, so if anyone is waiting for a specific response, you won't get one for a while. I'm done posting seriously or talking about anything until I heal and my family is better. I wish you all the best. Thank you to all the friends I've made here, everyone that treated me kindly, my great anons that kept me informed (and humble 🤡), and the talented people keeping this community going.
To people like Sara, Ki, Viper, Nes, Api, Wolfgang, Weepy, Blue, Moon, Twink, Van, and many many more- you made my time here great & regardless of anything that's happened now I still appreciate you and all you did to support me when I was hurt. To all the server members in general and my followers- I'm sorry for the pain or loneliness anyone has experienced from me not being able to be here to handle this issue. As well as to anyone that felt alienated or uncomfortable as black members of the server; being black myself, I should've been more aware and never allowed that to happen to you. Some of the members that expressed this, I considered close friends, which means I should have noticed even quicker and didn't. And when I was informed, I was too overwhelmed to do what I needed to reassure and protect you. Dollie/Corpsetrait may not be in the server any longer, but rot was there when the right choice would've been to remove rot until I had time to investigate all the claims, at the very least. That's what I've done now- too little too late. I know I could've done better, especially for my friends' sake and the server's, and I'll learn from that to make a better environment when I return. Make sure you keep all those receipts for me to put in my thinkpiece then- it's in the works, don't worry.
Finally, to all the people I disagreed with and shit talked in the past- no hard feelings. Keep fuckin' it up and I'll see you next time. ✌
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selfishdoll · 7 months
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❛ IM SORRY...❜
Oh, tell me what you're willing to do? | Kiss it, kiss it better, baby ⁺ 𓂋 𓈒 ♡ KISS IT BETTER
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ཐིཋྀ ⊹ 𓈒 SUMMARY.
you’re sick of choso being late for dates.. unfortunately he knows the perfect way to make it all better.
ཐིཋྀ ⊹ 𓈒 CONTENT WARNING.
mdni, reader is petty fr <3, oral (fem receiving), overstimulation, groveling choso (lowkey), fingering, multiple orgasms, pet names, praise, etc.
ཐིཋྀ ⊹ 𓈒 NOTE.
on my munch choso agenda & he seems like the type to eat pussy to make it up to you. unedited, please excuse typos & grammar mistakes.
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He was late. Again. For the third time. Your blood boiled within you, ass planted on your couch when it should be in your boyfriend’s car; on the way to your favorite restaurant. But no, Kamo Choso decided to ignore his alarm, and your many texts plus phone calls; to only answer them about thirty minutes after the time you two were supposed to be there.
Despite how remorseful he was on the phone, you were still a bit pissed; something he sensed easily.
With a soft grumble to yourself you rose from the couch, padding over to your bedroom. Your good mood was gone, you wanted nothing more than to lay in bed and watch some tv. Nothing Choso did would fix his mistake this time.
Entering the bedroom you sat at your vanity, beginning to remove your jewerly. First your rings, bracelet, and whilst working on your necklace you heard your front door open; causing your eyes to roll.
“(Y/N)?” Choso called, fiddling with his keys for a moment, shoulders faltering when you didn’t reply. Yeah, he knew he screwed up bad. Taking a breath he kicked his shoes off, waltzing over to your bedroom and peeking in to see you wiping your mascara away with a wipe. “I’m sorry for being late, we can still go.”
You didn’t answer, not even bothering to look at him as you continued to wipe away the minor makeup. Choso leaned against your doorframe, lips pressed into a thin line as he attempted to search for the words to change your mind. You were always so stubborn when you got like this, something he found cute until it was directed at him.
His thoughts trailed away the moment he heard your chair push out, watching you stand and waltz over to your closet; refusing to acknowledge him. You searched through your clothes for a moment before settling on a simple nightgown, moving backwards to your bed and sitting down. You leaned over, attempting to unclasp the anklet you wore, grumbling when it proved difficult given your nails. Finally fed up you sat up, extending your leg to Choso.
“Finally acknowledging me?”
“Just take off my anklet.” You mumbled, glancing away from him. The man gave a soft sound of disbelief mixed with amusement, moving closer and grabbing your leg. He pressed it against his chest, fingers fiddling with the gold plated jewelry of his name for a moment before his fingers trailed across your skin.
“You know I didn’t mean to oversleep.”
“Mhm.”
“And I’m really sorry too.” Choso claimed, watching your cross your arms and slowly nod. The man smiled a bit, leaning down to press a kiss to your ankle, feeling you twitch. That was enough motivation, lowering the kisses until they hit your inner thigh, watching you finally glance at him. “Choso..” You spoke, attempting to pull your leg away, only for his grip to tighten on your ankle. Your breath hitched as his free hand began to push your dress up to your stomach, lowering until he rested on his knees. “Choso.” You called out again, hissing the moment you felt his lips press against your covered slit.
“Lemme make it up to you princess. Show you how sorry I really am.”
Choso’s fingers caught on the band of your panties, pulling them down and off your body, hands grabbing the inside of your thighs to spread you wider. The man wasted no time in driving his thick tongue up your slit, fingers digging into your flesh to assure you didn’t move an inch. Lapping at your sex, shifting between teasing your entrance and tracing your sensitive bud; continuing to grip you with each twitch of your thighs.
Your resolve was melting away, struggling to keep your moans at bay. You wanted to be mad at him, even if it was an honest mistake. You wanted to be petty and ignore him. But, he was just so damn good with his tongue. A messy eater that left you shaking and trembling with each careful swipe of his wicked muscle. You bit your palm, legs closing around his head as your eyes pinched close; widening the moment two fingers entered you, curling against your spongy walls. Your hand flew to his hair, his messy black tresses being pulled in a tight grip.
“Choso—!”
“There it is..” The man murmured, pulling back from your cunt; thumb quickly replacing his tongue on your clit. His digits thrusted and scissored inside you, furiously rubbing circles on the bud— all while his heavy lidded eyes stared up at you. “That’s it.. Not as mad as you were before, huh?”
You whimpered as his fingers went deeper, all the way down to the knuckle as wet squelches erupted from between your legs. You wanted to defend your case, maybe curse him out too— instead you could only moan and shake, losing yourself in the pleasurable apology.
Choso gave a knowing smile, enjoying the way your previously irritated expression melted into nothing but pure ecstasy. He would give a proper apology later but now, this would do.
“Can’t even speak.. that’s okay, she’s talking enough for you.” The man spoke, removing his thumb to go right back to sucking and lapping at your swollen button; unfazed as your thighs continued to close around his head. Your hips rose, grinding into his face as the band in your stomach tightened and tightened.
His name fell from your lips in a dazed mantra, eyes glazed over before you broke; a high pitched cry escaping you as you came— tainting his face in your mess. Your legs shook, greedily sucking up air as you attempted to come down from the high; all while he continued to suck and thrust his fingers inside you.
Soon enough the sensitivity became too much, hand sliding from his hair to push at his forehead— whining as the pleasure teetered on painful. Choso didn’t let up however, quickening his fingers all while sucking your poor bud raw. Tears of overstimulation trailed down your hot cheeks, head twisting back and forth as you tried to somehow run from the pleasure. You only got an inch away before he was releasing your thigh to instead lay his heavy arm across your lower stomach; holding you there.
“Cho—Choso.. please fuck—! I forgive you.. fuck I can’t—“ Whimpers escaped you, the pushes against his forehead becoming weak as your hips rose into his face. Your were making such a mess of yourself, him, and your blankets; something you couldn’t give a damn about at the moment.
Your stomach clenched harder than before, both hands gripping his hair as your back arched; his name exiting your throat incoherently, creaming all over his face and fingers.
You sniffled and breathed heavy, blurry eyes watching Choso slowly pull away from you after lapping all your juices up. He crawled over your tired body, fingers finding your cheeks to turn you, capturing your lips in a nasty, wet kiss. Your hand lazily grasped his arm, blinking heavily, hissing when his thigh brushed between your legs.
“Hurts, Choso..” You spoke softly, pulling back to breathe. The man chuckled at your words, leaning down to kiss your wet cheek.
“I know. I’ll be gentle next time.” A lie. One you both knew.
His strong arms reached under you, pulling you into him as he laid on his side. “I am really sorry for sleeping through my alarm, I know how much you wanted to go.”
You shook your head slowly, smiling at your lover tenderly. “No. You worked the night shift, I have to be a little more understanding.” You spoke, fingers trailing his arm to which Choso smiled back. The two of you shared another sweet kiss, hands brushing across the other’s form.
“How about we order in?”
“Sounds perfect.”
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manicrouge · 4 months
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Inundate
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[𝙰𝚄: 𝙶𝚞𝚊𝚛𝚍!𝚂𝚒𝚖𝚘𝚗 𝚁𝚒𝚕𝚎𝚢 𝚡 𝚂𝚒𝚛𝚎𝚗!𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛] || 𝙿𝚕𝚊𝚢𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝
[𝙳𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝙿𝚘𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚍]: 05/01/24
[𝙰𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝]: Sorry is the siren whose selfishness results in carnage.
[𝙲𝚠]: gore, murder, blood, body horror, angst, character deaths (both major and minor), hurt/comfort, smut, possessive!simon, inexperienced!reader, creampie, hurt and NO COMFORT, mention of the loss of a parent.
[𝚆𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝙲𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝]: 18,536
[𝙰/𝙽]: Since so many people liked the first part (ty for ur support btw i am blown away by all the love ive been getting... it's enough to make a grown woman cry) HERE'S PART TWO!!! I hope it's just as entertaining as the first part and a good continuation to the story, although if you dislike it, just pretend this part never happened. Also this took so long because between writing this I have been watching the cat in the hat (best movie of all time btw).
I had a lot of fun writing this and can't wait for more alt aus !! I think the next think i have planned has something to do with everyones favourite ghost so... keep an eye out for that :3
(Pls ignore any typos I am very tired and really wanted to get this done so if I have made any I do apologise)
Comments are always appreciated !!
If you haven't already read it, I advise you read 𝙿𝚊𝚛𝚝 𝙾𝚗𝚎 !!
Please don't post my work anywhere else without my permission !!
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There is something in the water.
There's something looking at him. He can sense it, he can feel it, and the feeling of whatever it is makes his blood run cold. Words have been leaving his mouth as he stands upon the ship, his eyes blood red at the very belief that something is there.
Leaning over, he watches as the ship caves into the waves, the village in the distance growing further and further away, the sound of songs and cheers emitting from the belly of the vessel.
Perhaps he's just a little sea sick, that's his excuse for the creeping sense of dread which is climbing up his spine the further he looks into the water, searching for the same set of black eyes that had stared at him that night while he obeyed the Captains orders.
Nausea rumbles his stomach, he feels the urge to grip the side of the ship and expel his guts for he cannot escape the image of that siren. It's as though, even though she is dead and gone (somewhere no one knows), she is still there with him, under his nails, infecting him with a sickly guilt that has caused his pores to ooze, the skin on his lips to crack, and his sleepless eyes to remain bloodshot.
He is rotting from the inside out.
Despite months having gone by, his hands are still slicked with the blood of the bleeding siren. He's scrubbed and scrubbed, and still, the dark red tinge under his nails persists. His hair is wild, flecks of grey sparkling in the daylight as he brings his hands together in an attempt to quell them as they continue to shake.
They're not alone anymore.
They haven't been for a while, yet, they have been none the wiser to it until the discovery of that... thing.
Granted, he's unsure as to whether or not he is grateful for knowing what is in the depths of the sea, or if he would have preferred it to stay a secret.
There is something following the ship, he knows there is something following the ship, whether beside it or under it- it doesn't matter.
He's heard the stories, read too many books in the library to count, and even since the murder of the siren, there has been a different air in the village just as there is at sea. Something is displeased, they are displeased, he knows they are.
'Roland, are you seriously looking for one of those things again?'
A hand is placed in his movement and he jolts, yelping at the sudden contact, his hands wrapping around the beam he has been using to look over the ship. There's a scoff from the man standing behind him as he scratches his beard, looking him up and down before his hands settle on hips hip.
'For fucks sake kid,' he exclaims, shaking his head, 'you're making yourself with the thought of the fuckin' things- have you looked in the mirror recently?'
He’s choking on his words, his tongue seemingly too big for his mouth as he gargles out an incoherent mess. Quite frankly, he would have been better throwing up overboard; at least then man would get a proper response from him. His cheeks are red as he concludes he should keep his mouth shut.
'You should have stayed on land,' he sharply states, 'this is our land, they don't have a fucking leg to stand on out here, right?' asks the man, wrapping his arm around his shoulder, holding his hand out as he points towards the sea with a bright smile on his face. 'One of theirs washed up on our shore, and they didn't stand a fuckin' chance against us.'
Observing the land, he swallows hard at the sight of a small mound of rocks sitting in the distance, tensing in the grip of the man standing beside him.
'She was on land,' he chokes out, resting his forearm against the edge of the ship, resting his head against his arms. The fluid motion of the water slightly rocking the boat side to side worsens his sickness as he sits and attempts to focus on his breathing. 'And she only died 'cause Price fucked up.'
'She only lived for as long as she did because that fuckwit was acting on the orders of the Lord,' says the man beside him, smacking his hand against his back, rendering the other breathless as he heaves for a gasp of air. 'Do I need to go to the Captain and get this boat turned around,' he lowly asks, 'because you're lookin' to be more of a fuckin' burden than anything else.'
Straightening his posture, he lets go of the edge of the shift, rubbing his face with his hands, shaking his head.
Rubbing his eyes, he winces at the dull pain as he does so, 'no, no, you don't... jus' haven't been sleeping recently, that's all,' he explains, 'been worrying about this trip but... I need the money; it's been rough recently.'
'Then get your fucking act together,' snaps the man, 'can't have some stupid mer-freaks scaring you, hey? They've probably left these waters, anyway,' he shrugs, 'they're like spiders; they fear us more than we fear them, and the only thing you've got to be fearful is Donny seeing you in this state, yeah?'
'Yeah,' he nods, noting that they're growing closer and closer to the mound of rocks. 'Need the money for this job.'
'Don't we all,' laughs the man, 'I'm gonna go get a drink, you gonna join me?'
As he looks at the an, he pictures the hot room beneath the deck with one too many bodies crammed into there, all for the sake of getting their hands on some rum. His stomach is burning as bile bubbles. There is nothing worse his mind can conceive at this moment, it's simply a death wish to accept his generous offer.
'No, I'm gonna stay up here; feel a bit sick,' he confesses, 'cause of the long break of voyages.'
Placing both of his hands on his bloated belly, Mike rolls his eyes, letting out a chuckle, 'I will say, strange how trade has been quiet for the past few months, isn't it? Got a village full of hungry people here and they're expecting us to sustain ourselves? That hardly seems culpable.’
'Somethin' to do with the Lords guards. They have more power than good, they do,' snarls Roland, 'think it's okay to demand for cuts of the ships in the water, and for what?'
'To keep you safe it seems,' laughs the man, 'can't have you vomiting into the ocean and angering the big fish, right? Have the village under water in the matter of seconds if you spilled your guts overboard.'
His laughter continues while he keeps his eyes glued on the small island of rocks. Holding his breath, he narrows them as the sun glares down at hm, burning his flesh. Sweat tricks from off of his forehead, chapped lips smacking together as he begins to smile.
'Bet it has something to do with the freak with the skull mask on.... Say, Mike, you ever seen his face before?' he asks with a furrowed brow.
Reflecting for a moment, he rests his hand against his hip, tapping his foot as he looks past Roland, staring into the sea as he contemplates. Resting either elbow on the edge of the ship, he lazily slouches awaiting the answer.
'No, can't say I have, hasn't left the house with that stupid fuckin' thing since he became one of the guards... you reckon it's real?' he asks with a laugh.
'Yeah fuckin' right,' Roland laughs, 'tied to the back of his head with pieces of silk, you really think someone like that has the fuckin' balls t’ kill someone and wear their skull as a souvenir?'
Both of them pause, sharing a look with one another.
Then Mike begins to laugh, Roland not too far behind as the pair of them howl.
His sickness abandons him as the pair of them laugh together. Tilting his back, he keeps his eyes screwed shut as he lifts a leg up, unable soothe the joyous ache in his gut.
'Yeah fuckin' right,' Mike says, wiping his eyes with his chubby fingers, 'he's doin' arts and crafts at...'
His laughter quells.
Even his sharp gasps for air dissipate.
Roland continues to laugh, only, after a few moments of silence, he clears his throat, his breath clawing at the inside of his throat.
He finds the hairs on his arms stand up, the wrinkles on his sickly face appearing as his peeling lips come together while lifting his head to look at Mike.
The elder man is pale, staring blankly past him into the sea.
'What?' Roland slowly asks, staring at the man, a smile tugging at his lips.
Unmoved by his comment, he turns his head to look in the direction where the man is looking.
Sinking his teeth into his bottom lip, he holds his breath as his eyes scan over the area.
There's the depth of the sea, they have passed the rocks he's heard in many account from those who have survived the sirens.
There is nothing there but the sea and the sky.
'Got ya',' chuckles the man behind him, continuing to laugh in the same manner he was laughing in before, 'you really thought I was gonna say that there's a siren there, didn't you? Gotta get them off of your mind, son.'
‘I know,' Roland retorts, 'the skull faced freak really helped... like medicine he is, strange fellow, yet so good for the soul, eh?'
'Good for the soul, but not the wallet,' snorts the latter. 'Wouldn't even say he's medicine, you're givin' him too much credit by sayin' that.'
'Oh?' Roland says, 'then what do you suppose he is then?'
'A witches potion,' he answers.
'Even that seems too nice,' says the spotty man, 'a quacks remedy is more fitting I think.'
The pair of them begin to laugh again, the waves crashing either side of the boat, and with every second they grow further and further from the little pile of rocks, and he finds his aching muscles are soothed.
The bustling cheers of the sailor help to warm his heart and he begins to think that he can stomach some rum.
A drop wouldn't kill a man, that's for sure.
In fact, it'll probably work well to settle his stomach.
'I think I've had a change of heart on the invite,' he says with a smile, 'drop of rum never killed anyone, has it?' he continues on brightly as though he had not been moments away from emptying his guts all of the deck. 'Well, it hasn't yet, at least.'
'That's the spirit,' Mike grins, 'probably help you with that uneasy stomach of yours, know it helps with mine, at least,' he says so while patting his stomach, looking over his shoulder to towards the door beneath the top of the ship where the Captain stands.
The man doesn't even move to address Mike, keeping his eyes set right in front of him, his hat tilted slightly downwards to keep the sun out of his eyes.
Opening his mouth to respond, all air exudes from his lung as he feels an ice cold touch on his shoulder.
Slowly, he turns his head, looking down to the wet patch on his shirt. A short breath escapes him as he notes the webbed hand, nails as sharp as daggers digging through the fabric of his shirt.
'Gonna take more than a quacks remedy to fix your issues,' a soft voice whispers as the hand on his shoulder shifts, and with one fair slash, the skin on his throat is shred as he is pulled overboard.
A gargled scream escapes him.
Writhing against the strong hold, his eyes water as he gasps for air as his body is dragged under the current. Swallowing mouthfuls of blood and water, he chokes out babbled for them to come back, for them to stop as the ship charged through the seas.
Cruelly, the siren holding him keeps him above water as he chokes.
'Don't worry about them,' says the voice behind him, 'water's waitin' for them, a pretty song is too.'
With that, he cries out in agony as your nails are drove into his stomach, the flesh snapping as you drag your fingers through his stomach.
'You helped in her capture,' you seethe, 'you're lucky I haven't flooded the entire fucking town, but if I don't find the man who murdered her, you best believe that entire town is going to drown in the same water as you.'
'T- They'll...' he wretches out, the strength in his kicks calming as his eyes grow heavy, '...kill you,' he firmly states, gritting his teeth.
A loud laugh graces his ears as your grip on him loosens.
'Only if they can swim with a slit throat.'
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Blood washes off easily with water.
It's the nails it's difficult to remove it from, and he struggles with all his might as he stands at the edge of the shore, scraping his nails into the sand. It doesn't help at all, though, he still insists on doing so; it's the only time the stain of red is obscured.
The beach is bitter to him these days, and even though his mouth is protected from the elements as he keeps his balaclava over his mouth, he still feels a faint tingle on his mouth as he recalls the moment he spent here with you.
You're difficult to avoid, especially whenever he's passing the beach on patrol. Price has made a point to keep him away from it, placing him next to the Lords house during his patrols. He says it's to make it easier on him, so he's not as distracted while doing an important job.
When he's near the Lords house, his ears ring with the sound of your screaming and crying, and the blood under his nails grows darker.
There's a temptation whenever he's nearing the house; one cut to the throat and he would be dealt with.
As easy as that.
Truthfully, the old man has nothing to do with the issues going on within, but he's clamouring for someone to hate, for someone to blame. The old man made the orders, they could have just let her go, but they didn't.
And then you left with her.
In the morning after Serelia's burial, when he woke to an empty bed, his lungs turned to ice. It was unlike anything he had ever experienced, the feeling of utter despair as he found the pink dress he had bought for you gone along with yourself.
There was no residue of body heat on your side of the bed, he struggled to find anything to even prove you existed as he rushed around the house with wild eyes.
'Sweetheart?' he called, forcing the door to the bathroom open.
The light shined in from the window, though, there was nothing in there aside from the bloody frock he'd helped you remove the night before.
Picking it up off of the ground, he held it out in front of him looking at the drying blood in the fabric. He didn't know why he did it if anything, it only works to worsen his panic.
In the midst of public, eyes are everywhere... what if someone heard your confession to him? What if it was the same someone who hurt Serelia?
He dropped the dress promptly, his hand over his mouth as his face paled at the very thought of you being taken- of you meeting the same fate as the poor siren he'd buried. Only, in the memory, it was your face he was covering with the shabby old white sheet he found in the cabin, and it was your blood on that dress and not hers.
For the next few minutes, he spent them on his knees, gripping the edge of the toilet as he threw up what little he had in his stomach, ridding his body of the last moments he had spent with you.
After the remnants of the pastry he'd eaten before were in the toilet bowl, he suffered through a terrible burning in his throat as his face grew hot as he thought against all urges to throw up anymore. Yet, he failed, a mixture of stomach acid and spit landing in the bowl.
The smell was grotesque, yet, the taste of it was even worse.
His eyes were teary when he eventually forced himself off of the ground, rushing out of the room, quickly changing into his uniform, leaving the skull of his mask in his bedroom, tying the balaclava around his face before rushing out of the door.
People look at him with raised brows, finally able to see the top part of his face, yet, he doesn't care as he sprints through the village, his heart pounding against his chest, hoping that one of the women passing him is you.
The library is closed, you can't be there and he wants to scream as he holds the side of his head, his throat tightening up. How he longed to have the simple luxury of seeing you sat in the library again with a book on your lap. Though, as he peered through the glass of the small building, the space was simply a husk.
Heat climbed up his neck as he heaves out desperate breaths. His skin grew itchy and his blunt nails clawed at the flesh on his neck as he gulped hard attempting to chase after air, to find some form of peace to calm himself.
You left in silence, you left without a goodbye- surely you wouldn't have been so cruel to do so. You would have said something to him, left something for him to let you know that you were okay.
The missing dress is the only form of hope he had, though, the missing dress means nothing; someone could have taken that with you to make it look as though you left on your own accord and not someone else's.
The world is spinning as his breathing quickens, he can hardly make sense of anything around him and he finds himself growing more frustrated by the second. You could be anywhere, he hadn't let you out of his sight for more than a month, and the moment he sleeps with you beside him is the moment you disappear.
After the library, he checked the beach, yet it was clear, not a being in sight, nor a siren.
You were nowhere to be found.
The crashing waves and the grey sky swelled in his head rendering him speechless as he blinks back the tears, clenching his fists as he turned away from ocean, returning back to the village.
When he opened the door to the station, the first face he was greeted with was the both who Price had tasked with the mission of looking after Serelia.
The fool who was sloppy enough to leave her by herself.
'Mornin' Si', you want a tea?' Johnny asked, turning his attention away from Rhys standing beside him.
He doesn't care to respond to the man, instead, he grabbed the throat of the man beside him, slamming him against the wall with gritted teeth.
The man startled in his hold, letting out a loud gasp as Simon's fist around his neck tightens with the intent of only loosening when he felt the bone crunch in his fist.
'You fucking bastard!' he screamed.
Rhys doesn't dare move, weak wretches escaping him as he squirmed in his hold.
A hand grabs his shoulder, 'woah, woah, hey, Simon calm down!' Johnny exclaimed, 'you're gonna kill the fuckin' kid.'
'That' the whole point,' he snapped, 'you let that fuckin' siren die.'
'I- I didn't,' the man managed out.
'You left her alone and she was fucking murdered- this is your fault, Price put you up to it and you left her with no one there to protect her and she died.'
At that point, he could hear the blood in his veins, and had he not been forced off of him by Johnny and Price, he very well would have snapped the kids neck.
Rhys fell to the ground with a harsh gasp while Price stepped in front of him and Johnny kept hold his arms. When Simon stepped forward, Price placed his hand against his chest, shoving him backwards.
'Simon,' warned the man, 'bring it in, I've already got the death of that fucking siren on my case, I don't need another one to account for too.'
His eyes grew blurry as he looked at the man.
'What's wrong?' Johnny asked from behind him, 'whats happened?'
Everything folded in on itself, the cold morning, the absence of you and your dress, the bloody dress on the floor. Everything, every single thing he built with you collapsed, and he was unable to keep it all together as he ripped his arms from out of Johnny's hold.
Looking past Price, he pointed his finger in the direction of the brown-haired man on the floor, clenching his teeth, 'it's your fault she's fuckin' gone,' he seethes, 'all your fucking fault,' he mustered up before storming out the Station, blinking back tears as he returned home, knowing you weren't going to be there.
The beach is bitter now, but the memory is worse.
He doesn't know why he bothers to sit at the beach during the nighttime, perhaps it's in the hope that you'll reappear, or maybe the moon will send him a sign that you're safe somewhere her, and that the only part of you with Serelia is the skirt from the bloody frock he still has in his house.
It's peaceful at night, especially with the waves rolling in gently, and he imagines you're sitting on a rock somewhere, humming a sweet tune, causing trouble as you did so.
Anyone else would have been horrified with the confession, though, as he thinks about the damage that the people in the village have done to you, he wishes you'd flood the entire village and wipe it clean of all the scum in it.
At least then, even if he were to die in the flood, he'd die knowing that it was by your hand and no one else's.
And in his death, the man who he was held back from would also meet the same fate. That's all he's asking for.
Unsheathing the dagger in his belt, he drives it into the ground, dragging it through the grains of sand, taking his eyes from the sea to the deep line he's carved into the sand.
The throat of the Lord or Rhys would be better suited, though, he knows the fate awaiting him if he does something like that.
As he stares at the sand, the crunch of boots against the sand or the creak of a lantern behind him catching his attention though he doesn't turn his head; he knows the walking pattern well... he needs to get lighter on his feet if he's going to attempt to scare him.
'Thought I'd find ya 'ere, Lt,' says the man, walking beside him, not bothering to ask him if he can take a seat beside him. With a grunt, he lands on the ground, exhaling as he looks to the man sitting beside him. 'You've been comin' here since she left.'
'You spying on me?' Simon retorts.
'Seen you while on patrol, actually,' Johnny answers, 'difficult to miss, a big lump of coal you are,' he says with a chuckle, 'ya looked like you needed the company 'cause you've been keeping to yourself for months, and I know ye not typically a man of many words, but you've become a Ghost.'
He doesn't answer him, instead, he drivers his knife further into the sand.
'You gonna tell me what's actually going on, or are you gonna keep it a secret so no one can help you?' he asks, 'I've been thinking about the state of you the morning you nearly broke that kids neck, I've never seen you like that before.'
'You'll never see me like that again.'
'What did the death of that siren have to do with her leaving?'
His knuckles whiten around the knife.
'Kyle told us she was in a right state when Rhys got to the Station that morning. You forced him to keep everyone away from the cabin but the entire village heard her crying,' he explained, 'it was the talk of the town for days after.'
Looking at the man sitting beside him, he fights against the truth.
'The siren was what she was here for, wasn't she?' he asked.
Simon's breath gets caught in his throat.
'I've been goin' over it for weeks whenever I get a spare minute, the carry on out of her, her washing up on the shore out of the blue- not being able to remember the name of where her and her sister were goin' on that ship... none of that was true, was it?'
'No,' Simon answered, 'she told me when we found Serelia, we buried her and in the night she left... or someone took her,' he said.
'You think someone took her?'
'She was screamin' for the entire fuckin' village to hear, Johnny,' he snaps, letting go of the knife as he turns his attention back towards the ocean, 'anyone coulda heard her, including whoever killed Serelia. And I just keep goin' over it.'
He knows he'd never be able to forgive himself if such was confirmed, for what kind of protector would he be if he couldn't have stopped that monster from getting to you?
'What if she just... went back to the water?' he asks, 'that's where she belongs anyway, right? If she got a hold of the girl, she would have went back with her anyway.'
'She didn't say goodbye,' Simon utters.
'Maybe she didn't say goodbye because she knew you wouldn't be able to go,' he shrugs, 'if she woke you in the middle of the night and told you she had to go back home, would you have let her go?'
As he looks out onto the water, he contemplates his question, thinking back to the very night he lost you. He recalls the pair of you lying his bed, how you mumbled one last 'I love you' to him before leaving. Only, this time, you didn't leave without telling him. Instead, you look him dead in the eyes and tell him that you have to go.
Even debating the scenario in his head causes his heart to hurt.
'No...' he begins, his eyes narrowing as he keeps his eyes trained on the water.
It's difficult to see in the darkness, though, the light from the moon against the water highlights something bobbing closer and closer to the shore. Raising to his feet, Johnny looks up at him.
'You see that?' he asks, motioning over to the water.
The blob in the sea dips and raises with each wave rolling in, though with his mask and tired eyes, he's unsure if he's seeing something because it's there, or if his imagination is simply willing it to be sign he has been craving for the past couple of months.
'Aye,' he says, raising to his feet.
The pair stand idly staring at the bobbing blob.
'Whatever it is, it isn't alive,' says Johnny, watching as the man beside him shrugs off his cloak, untying the ribbon of his mask and pulling the balaclava off of his face, allowing it all to fall to the floor.
'Keep an eye on it for me, won't you?' Simon asks, looking over his shoulder, not bothering to wait for a response as he rushes into the water, heading directly towards the mysterious mass in the water.
Wading through the water, his pants grow heavier as his boots fill with water, though, he's uncaring as the water reaches his waist. The closer her gets to the body, the darker he finds the water grows.
'You know what it is yet?' calls the man on the shore.
Squinting, he reaches his hand out, placing his hand against the strange mass, pulling it over so he can see what it is.
Hollowed out eyes stare back at him, the sockets devoid of eye balls as he stares at the corpse a float in the water. It's intestines brush against his knee as though they have a life of their own.
The sight is brutal and in the darkness, he can't quite make out the feature of who the body is.
Grabbing the corpse under its armpits, he turns his head back to shore to see Johnny waiting with eager eyes to see what has been uncovered.
'It's a dead body!' Simon says with a grunt as he pulls the body through the water, leaving a trail of blood behind him as he drags it with him.
From behind him there's a slosh of water, the stammering breaths of the man appearing right beside him as he gawks at the corpse. He doesn't say anything, quite reserved for a man who is looking death in the eyes. Instead, he grabs its arm, helping Simon pull it to shore.
The heels of the corpse dig into the sand as he's pulled back to shore, the pair of them dropping him with a huff. Their clothes drip against the land as Johnny grabs the lantern he left beside Simon's masks and cloak, holding it over the body so the pair of them can grasp what it is they're dealing with.
The torso of the corpse is naked, the flesh of its stomach looking as though some sort of wild animal had gotten its hands on him. Only, its the intent of the cuts that tells him otherwise, his throat hangs open, exposing the top of his spine and vocal cords, loose flaps of skin blowing in the wind as the corpse leaks sea water and blood onto the sand.
As Simon moves his eyes up, he lets out a brittle exhale.
'This is one of the fellas who left on the ship today,' Johnny comments, looking to Simon who simply keeps his eyes glued to the chest of the man. 'Roland...' his words trail as he rips his eyes from off of the corpses face, all to see the very thing that Simon is staring at.
Johnny gulps.
'Your girl capable of doing that?' he says with a raised eyebrow.
In the bloody mess of the man, he finds exactly what he has been hoping to fine since he woke up that morning to find you were gone.
Of course, it could have been a shark attack- something other than the work of your hand, only, the confirmation of life is etched into the body as though it's a stone tablet or a tombstone.
Carved into the chest of the dead man is the word 'murderer'.
Simon smiles at the sight of the corpse, looking out onto the water.
'That's her,' he breathes, looking towards the moon, 'she's alive.'
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
The thing is, with humans at least, they're fragile when it comes to pain.
When something seems out of the ordinary, they're inclined to shit themselves and become a crying blubbering mess, begging for mercy as though it is them who are innocent when they acted with the intent of taking another's life.
Even the strongest man cowers when they're forced to encounter something unknown, and you rejoice as you blood at the bloody man on his knees before you.
The curse of the moon never truly left you, still tied to the humans upon leaving the water, and while you have a prolific distaste for you can no longer join the sirens upon the rocks, it works well when the ship is driven into rocks and one of the men manage to scramble to the shore.
He thinks he's safe until you walk from out of the water.
The tides turn and the small smirk on his face disappears as he realises you do indeed have legs and can walk right up to him. Either way, he's a fool to possess such smugness, a song from the water would have drove him right back to you anyway.
'P- Please, please, please, I- I'm sorry, what do you want? I'll give you whatever you want, you want money?' he chokes out, holding his hands out in front of him.
The blood of his friend you plucked from off of the ship mingles with the sea water as he trembles in the cool breeze.
Some dry patches even stick to him, a clump of congealed blood sticking to one of his eyebrows. Trebling hands dig into his pockets as he holds out a handful of golden coins.
You think of Simon briefly, smiling to yourself as you recall the soup you attempted to made with the golden coins he had given you. How you basked in the light of his home eating the slop in the bowl, but none of that mattered because the pair of you had each other.
And then your mind falls to the dress he gifted you.
The dress you left on the bathroom floor, the dress you ripped to leave a piece of yourself with Serelia, the dress stained with her blood.
Raising your hand, you slap the money out of his hands, the coins landing with a hollow thud onto the sand of the a small cove. 'I don't want your money,' you snap, grabbing his shirt, pulling him to you with gritted teeth. 'I want you to answer my question, and if you dance around it, I'll cut you from gut to gullet and let the sharks eat the rest of you body.'
'Of course, o- of course, anything, I'll tell you anything you want to know,' shudders the man, tears flowing freely down his wrinkled face.
Edging closer to him, your face is right in front of his, you can smell the booze on his breath as he sniffles, looking at you doe eyes.
'Who killed the siren you captured?'
He looks at you, opening his mouth as he stumbles and trips over the words leaving his mouth. All attempts to form words are lost to the panic he works himself into as he attempts to think of an answer which will satisfy you, yet keep whoever is guilty safe.
Your grip grows tighter on his hair.
'I- I don't know, I don't know, I'm sorry,' he sobs, 'please- please—'
Shoving him back onto the ground, you turn away from him, clenching your fists.
'Bull-fucking-shit.'
His sobs simmer as you look back to the water, taking a moment to contemplate his response. And, you find that you don't like what he has to say, in fact, you fucking despise it because you know for a fact he is full of shit.
Turning sharply on your heel, you look at the man, taking a breath before bringing your hand across his face. He falls with a huff, his face pressing against the sand as he lets out another pitiful cry.
'Wrong answer, try again,' you demand, leaning over, grabbing a fistful of his greasy hair, pulling his head up. Your breath ghosts his ear as you speak through clenched teeth, 'who killed the siren?'
'I- I heard whispers around the village!' he blurts, 'they said that whoever it was was smart and no one suspects them of it... b- but I know it wasn't the man you murdered.'
You let go of his hair.
The only people who knew where Serelia was were the Guards of the village and you know Simon would never have done something so brutal. Price cares too much about his duty to do something so horrible, even though to him, you're sure her death was much more of an inconvenience then it was a heartbreak.
Your mind aches as you go down to Johnny and Gaz. Why would they do something so cruel? As much as you despise their kind, you struggle to see why they would bring harm to her. It wouldn't make sense- even Gaz told you he would have freed her if their hands were
And then your heart stops.
Confirmation is the one thing you have longed for since returning to the sea, the one thing your sisters have wanted for the longest time. You looks at you with wide eyes, stammering out whispers as you release your hold on him.
The entire time you thought she was safe, she was in the hands of her murderer.
Your self indulgence and brief romance cost her her life.
Placing your hand against your forehead, you pace back and forwards in front of the man.
'The boy who Price hired to make sure she was safe,' you mumble to yourself, wiping your face with your hand. How could you have been so blind? Word never got out about her being anywhere, he never went home that night... he disappeared and Gaz couldn't find him that morning.
He was getting rid of the evidence of his crime and he succeeded.
Walking down the sand, you ignore the calls of the man as you return to the water. There's nothing around, no land, no safety, simply just a small cove a lot of soldiers don't account for until it is, fortunately, too late.
'Hey! Hey! You can't leave me here!' screams the man as you walk further into the water. 'I'm going to die out here! There's nothing around here, please, I told you what you wanted, how some mercy.'
Stopping in your tracks, you exhale, peering over your shoulder.
'This is mercy,' you briefly answer before walking into the water, disappearing out of his view for good.
Even under the water his screams travel though you don't care to show any form of kindness as you move away.
He deserves his death for his attempted lie, and you also find anger bubbling for you know what you have to do because of his confession- something you have been escaping for a while.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
They work well on the side of the law, they stick to it as much as they can, though, when the pair of them shared a look while on the beach, they both knew what they had to do.
The breeze is gentle as the move the body further up the beach, occasionally turning their heads to look upwards in the direction for any sign of life as they do so.
Roland's intestines drag along the shore, his body leaking blood and water, leaving a gruesome trail behind the pair of them. Fortunately, the water will wash any trace of gore away and it will be as though he never existed in the first place.
'Why has she decided to pop up now?'
'First ship at sea for months,' he states, 'I'm surprised she hasn't tried to drag the entire village underwater with how torn she was.'
'What did you do with the girls body?' he asked, 'had Price choked up as he tried to explain to the Lord where the body disappeared off to, as far as he's concerned, there's no such thing as sirens cause he hasn't seen it with his own eyes.'
The old Lord is stubborn in his ways, that the pair of them know well enough not to bother questioning his reasonings. Upon his return, Simon recalls the look of upset when Price had to inform the man that they, as the guards of the village, failed at their duties. The body of the siren was nowhere to be seen, and he had to stand and watch as the Captain was subject to a brutal scolding, knowing well where the sirens body had disappeared off to.
It was unfair of him to do that, risking John's position all to keep the burial ground sacred and untouched, but he was still bruised and bleeding from the events that had taken place that night and the morning following.
All he can think about while standing in the room was the look on your face, how your bottom lip wobbled as you laid the fabric of your cherished dress upon the deceased girl, not bothering to consider your love for the item on your body, rather, the love you had for the woman lying in the ground.
Nothing was worth destroying that moment. Nothing.
'Buried it,' Simon answers, 'she's buried at the top of the cliff, just past the Lords house,' he says, setting the man down on the ground as they edge closer and closer to a small cove beneath the cliff, looking up at it.
'Lookin' over her home, ey?' Johnny asks with a small smile, 'her idea, I'm guessing.'
'It was mine, actually.'
'Didn't know y' were the sentimental type, Lt,' he comments with a smile, 'didn't know y' even had a heart.'
'I do,' Simon retorts.
'Really?'
'Yeah... a cold one.'
He doesn't miss the way the latter rolls his eyes.
'Wouldn't be sayin' that if she was here with you right now though, would ya?' he laughs, taking a breath before the pair of them continue to move the body. 'No, I can imagine y' now, all loved up. Thought of it makes me sick.'
Simon fights off the urge to scoff.
'Just say y' jealous, Johnny.'
'Oh, I am so jealous. I wish I had you to fall asleep to every night,' he whispers, his eyes moving from Simon to the body in their arms, 'cause, if that were the case, we'd be in bed right now, not carryin' a dead body, which your siren girlfriend mutilated, to hide it in a fuckin' cave,' he huffs, the darkness of the small cove swallowing the pair as they walked into it.
'These are typical activities for couples. We'd still be doin' it.'
Johnny doesn't bother to respond as the pair of them move further and further into the beast belly. 'Y' sure no kids gonna stumble across this corpse; he's gonna start to smell.'
'Tides rolling in tomorrow morning, not goin' back out until night,' Simon says, 'he'll be dragged back out to sea before anyone else gets to him.'
'Well, I hope y' right; if not, your girlfriends gonna be in a lot of trouble when the people in the village find out about this,' he says, finally relieving himself of the duty when he feels Simons hands slipping off of the body.
It lands in the wet sand of the cove with a wet splat, and the pair of them stare through the darkness, Johnny lifting his foot to find where exactly they placed the body.
'You think she's gonna come back?'
'Didn't dig her nails into him to for fun, Lt,' he answers, 'I reckon she'll show her face soon.'
Whether it is a few days, or even weeks, he doesn't care.
'I hope so.'
As long as you find your way back to him, the knowledge of you living is enough to soothe his weary eyes.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
The sisters of a siren are fierce and loyal, even when your tongue burns as you speak to them of the events which had happened during your time on land.
You suffered similar hardships to Serelia, at least, they're convinced you did.
So, as you address the group with blown eyes drawn to the surface, explaining your reasoning as to why you should tread the land, to go back into that village, you're hardly surprised when their looks change as they address you.
Motive is of importance and you wish to solve the case, to bring justice to the woman buried on the cliff edge.
But, selfishly, you're also wishing to bring justice to a man who you wronged.
'Return to land?' a voice barks, 'you will do no such thing; the last time one of us went on Land, her life was taken from her cruelly, I'm not allowing that to happen to you, not at all,' she continues.
You stare at her, looking around at the other disapproving faces which surround you. There's still a void where she would have sat and you feel your lips pulling down into a frown as you stare blankly at the space beside the woman who holds her pointer finger up at you.
'It's irresponsible, you'll get yourself killed if you do that.'
'I finally have confirmation of which human killed Serelia, Raithe,' you respond, rubbing your face as you turn your eyes from the empty space to the angered siren. 'I can kill him, I will kill him, but I need to be on land in order to do so.'
There's a brief silence between yourself and the ground and you feel your chest tightening as you observe all their faces. While stoic, you feel as though the sea is pressing all its weight down onto you in an unlawful attempt to drown you.
Though, in the eyes of unhappiness, you find that you would be thankful if the sea had such a mercy on you.
'I don't understand why we never lead the entire village into the sea,' another siren says, batting her blonde eyelashes as she looks at you, 'would've have gotten this over in a second. We kept our silence up in the first place because they never got as far as killing one of our own, but they captured her and held her as a prisoner- they held you as a prisoner too,' she continues, 'why are you showing them mercy? They deserve to drown for their crimes.'
You pale at the thought of committing such an act against the village.
'Because...' your words trail as you take a harsh breath, sinking further into the current, 'there are children in the village- that's not who we are.'
All of them raise their eyebrows in your direction and you feel small as they do so. Your shoulders touch the lobes of your ears as your entire body tenses.
'That not who you are, not anymore at least,' Raithe scoffs, narrowing her black eyes. 'You've gone soft.'
'No I haven't,' you refute, 'I- I just—'
'She's in love she is,' another speaks, pushing through the water, moving behind you to grab your shoulders. Pushing you closer to the group, her grip tightenings as she forces your neck to the side, the base of her nose ghosting your flesh as inhales your scent.
You freeze as she does so, the only saving thought being the fact that you haven't been held by Simon in months.
Her sharp nails press against the flesh on your stomach, her eyes narrowing as grabs your face, forcing you to look at her.
'Tainted, you are,' she says, 'look in her eyes, look how she moves, you're protecting the very humans that killed our sister,' she accuses, the looks on the others faces hardening in your direction.
'You don't want to go on land for revenge, you want to go and see whoever you were with during the time you were supposed to be searching for Serelia,' Raithe exclaims, 'you are just as much of a monster as those humans are, you wicked little witch!'
'No, no I'm not,' you quickly blurt.
'Then we flood the village; they're all guilty of murder because they helped take her in the first place,' answers the black-haired woman simply.
With beady eyes you look at her, and when a tight-lipped smile appears on her face, you feel the sudden urge to vomit.
You sense betrayal burning in their beings and have an overwhelming desperation to be away from them despite the ties of blood that keep you bound as sisters.
You're released from the hold of the siren behind you all for your face to be caught with the hand of Raithe. Keeping her webbed hand against your face, her grip tightens on you, nails digging into your cheeks as she grits her dagger-like teeth at you.
You squirm in an attempt to escape her hold, yet the only thing you achieve as you do such is forcing her nails deeper.
'You chose your side even before this meeting,' Raithe seethes, 'you chose it when you let Serelia die, you chose it when you lied to us because you are in love, Amalise is right,' she laughs, shaking her head. 'You love a human, how can you be so sure they wouldn't do what they did to you what their kind did to Serelia?'
'B- Because he isn't like that,' you cry, 'he isn't like that, he took care of me, he did everything he could to make me happy and he helped me bury Serelia.'
Your eyes grow wide as you realise the confession that accidentally slipped past your lips.
You don't miss the collective gasp, nor do you miss the feeling of Raithe's hold on you loosening, pulling away from you completely.
'You buried her?' Amalise asks, 'you buried her on land?' her tone raises as she clenches your fist.
'I couldn't have—'
You're struck with a razor sharp hand.
Her claws tear the flesh of your face as you're thrown through the current.
For a moment, you're much too dazed to realise what has happened until your grabbed by the throat.
'How fucking dare you!' Raithe screams, 'you lied to us a- and you buried her on land away from us so we cannot visit her? You are no siren, you are just as monstrous as those humans.'
Her fist tightens around your throat, specks of darkness appearing in your eyes as you attempt to pull her hand off of you. Your nails dig into her flesh, but she doesn't budge.
'You wish to be a human so bad, right? That's what you want, you're burdened by being one of us because if they knew, they would kill you because that's who they are.'
'N- No,' you choke out.
She edges closer to you.
'I don't believe you,' she utters, looking over her shoulder, 'I say she returns to the land, let her human have her,' she suggests, addressing the other sirens.
Much to your horror, they nod in agreement.
Raithe turns back to you, cocking her head to the side as she narrows her black eyes. 'You can be there to witness his death when we lead him to the sea,' she firmly says as you weakly writhe, blood pouring from the slash on your face, a tingling washing your entire body as your hands on her wrists falter and the world begins to grow dark.
'See if he still loves you with a ruined face.'
A final wretch escapes you before you're forced into darkness, leaving the world behind with the disapproving look of Raithe being the very last thing you see.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Patrol around the village these is quiet, and while he enjoys the silence most of the time, he can't help but hate the silence he's plagued with as he's walking around the dark streets.
No matter where he walks he can never escape the sound of the crashing waves. Typically, he enjoys the sound of the water, of the gulls squawking as he passes by the beach, only, ever since uncovering the body of that sailor, he's found the sound only takes him back to the leaking body parts and hollow eyes.
In his time he has seen a lot, yet, that truly takes the cake.
It's for a good cause, Simon knows the implications of the siren attacks and if word got out to the village folk, it will sure be difficult to fix. Their silence has been in their favour as he hardly hears mentions of Serelia in the village anymore, yet, he knows the fear is still there for a lot of people.
Like a criminal, while on patrol, he cannot help but return to the scene of the crime, watchful eyes looking over the shore in search for blots of blood.
It's difficult to know why he is doing so; as far as he's concerned, no one knows what the pair of them did, and truthfully, if someone does stumble across the body, he is fine.
No one suspects a guard, the protector of all.
Sea foam coats the bottom of his boots as he mindlessly wanders further down the beach, his tired eyes looking up towards the moon sitting in the sky. Despite the clouds blocking any stars from his view, the moon makes sure to make her presence known.
If he weren't so tired, maybe he'd acknowledge the red tinge marking her surface.
'Hey you,' a voice hisses.
He stops, snapping his head to look around, his forehead wrinkling as he spies a woman a few meters away from him sitting in the water.
Upon first glance, he straightens his posture, preparing to scold the woman for being so careless, walking out into the water alone in the dead of the night.
Then, the water around her shifts as she lifts her tail up from out of the wind, the moonlight catching the green tinge of her scales.
'Bloody hell,' he blurts out under his breath.
Before him lies a woman with thick, long black hair.
She kicks her tail up, resting her arms around the ground as she stares up at him with wide, black eyes, offering him the best smile she can muster. Her teeth are as sharp as knives and she trails her tongue over the points of them as she grins.
'Come closer,' she requests.
'Ye gonna kill me, lassie,' he responds, 'I know ave got a fun haircut, but am not that stupid.'
The woman scoffs.
'I'm asking you nicely,' she sharply states, 'walk away and you'll be right back in the water with the sound of a song, so I advise you do what I'm asking of you and come closer.'
She grows as cold as the wind as she stares at him, her brows furrowing as she looks in his direction.
Goosebumps form on his skin, and while his head is telling him to do anything else, he relents to her demands, slowly moving closer to her.
The water touches his boots as she sighs, pushing herself off of her stomach, rolling the water with a bright grin, lifting her head to look at the man with a giggle.
'Oh, you listen so well, who would have thought a human would be obedient,' she chuckles, allowing her webbed hands to fall above her head, merely missing the edge of his boots. 'I've got something for you,' she claims.
'A death sentence, perhaps?'
'There was a girl in this village a while back... few months ago now, looked as you did, with your legs and your gill-less necks, but she wasn't true to you, nor your people for she was a siren.'
His eyebrows raise upon her words, and she laughs harder.
'Oh so now I've got your interest now... I don't suppose you're the lover she had while she was on land, are you?'
'Nae.'
'Do you know of the man who she loved?'
'Aye, he's my friend,' he says with a nod, 'you know where she is?'
'I have her with me, some of my friends are keeping hold of her,' she explains, 'but... we've been having a talk, you see, and she no longer views the ocean as her home, nor does she view us as her sisters; she has been tainted by your kind.'
Her face contorts in a horrific manner as she pokes at the tips of his boots. Though, he doesn't move, knowing better than to sacrifice the happiness of Simon for the sake of his own safety.
The man needs this- he needs you back.
'I'm a woman of morality and I am not going to force her to stay where she doesn't want to be, and quite frankly, she is no longer one of our own- rather a traitor to her own kind,' she says, sitting up from off of the ground, looking out at the sea, 'so, you can have her, let her seek out the man who she loves.'
Everything she's saying seems too good to be true.
As he looks away from the woman, two more heads appear above the water, though they are that of shadows as they move forward. As the move closer and closer, the black-haired woman reaches out with greedy hands, and from out of the water, she plucks you, pulling you up the shore with a grunt.
In the moonlight, he catches the brutal gash on your face, how you tale shimmers in the moonlight before it melts into the sand, dissipating in a crude shimmer as you're pushed to him.
'What have y' done to her?' he asks, rushing towards your unconscious form, shrugging his jacket from off of his shoulders, using it to cover you.
'She isn't dead,' answers the black-haired woman, 'that would have been too kind,' she barks out a laugh, watching as Johnny takes you into his arms, staggering backwards from her. 'No need to fear us,' she gently coos, 'at least, not yet.'
He doesn't care to listen a second longer as he looks down to the deep wound across your face, rushing across the beach towards the steps which lead back into the village, the cackle of the siren booming.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Nighttime is quiet now.
Whenever he isn't working, he's only plagued with violent desires and ideas, tossing and turning on the sofa, curtains drawn so the moon cannot see him.
His feet hang off of the sofa, a dull ache in his spine as he lies in darkness, unable to sleep.
Tonight is particularly difficult as his heartbeat thumps against his chest and he finds himself tossing and turning at the very fact that, the night before, he got the confirmation he has been longing for for months.
You're alive.
Only, after a while of joy, he finds sadness lurks beneath the realisation as Johnny's point of you returning to the water very well may be true, meaning you left him willingly.
Your absence is cruel in that sense.
He's staring at his skull mask, slowly dozing off as the pounding sound of fists against his door tear him from his dazed state. They're eager, quick and desperate. If they knock any harder, they very well might knock the door down.
With a snarl on his face, he pulls back the thin sheet drawn over his body, marching up to the door. From beyond it, he hears pants for air, not missing a thick accent uttering, 'c'mon bonnie, you're fine, yeah?'
Immediately, he grabs the handle of the door, forcing it open with a hard pull.
The knocking stops as Johnny looks up at him with wild eyes, shoving past him with a body in his arms, rushing into the living room. For a moment, Simon keeps his eyes trained on the now empty spot where he was just standing, a short breath escaping him as he recalls the familiar colour of the hair.
Slowly, he closes the door, listening to the ragged breaths of the man, turning to him with his stomach in knots. He watches as you're placed down onto the couch, air escaping him as he notes the red stain in the mans white shirt as he turns his attention to him.
'It's her, Si',' he says.
Simon doesn't move.
'Some siren was sittin' on the beach, she gave her to me, said she'd betrayed her kind- that she's no better than us,' he explains, moving away from the sofa to the bookshelf, his hand patting along the wood in hopes of uncovering the box of matches he's spied a few times.
Moving over to the sofa, Simon reaches his hand out to you, resting it down on your shoulder. You're cold to the touch, the scent of sea water filling his nose as he hears the scrape of a match and the crackle of a wick.
An orange light is cast over your being as Johnny stands beside him with a candle in his hand.
From out of the darkness appears a crude claw-like mark on your cheek, blood dripping from the harsh gash down onto your bruised neck.
'What the fuck did they do to her?' he asks through gritted teeth, tearing at the fabric of his own shirt, kneeling down beside you, pressing the fabric against the cut on your face.
A noise escapes you when he does so, and he feels a heat bubbling in his stomach.
'You're okay, sweetheart,' he utters gently, keeping a firm pressure on the wound.
'I don't know,' Johnny answers, 'pulled her out of the water and gave 'er to me... said they don't want her anymore.'
Blood soaks into the fabric of his shirt as you stir.
A moan escapes your mouth, and as your eyes slowly open, you're aware of the agonising pain emitting from your cheek. Then follows the feeling of a familiar sofa, the sound of familiar voices and the warmth of a familiar hold.
Opening your eyes, you're greeted with the sight of Simon in the candle light.
Despite the bags under his eyes and the addition of a few pink scars on his face, he still looks as glorious as he did the night you left him.
'Simon?' you choke out at the sight of him.
You catch a shift in his eyes as he looks at you.
'I'm here, love,' he gently says, 'you're safe; I've got you.'
You can be there to witness his death when we lead him to the sea.
You hear her voice, her cruel tone, and the coldness of her words flood through your veins, fighting off any ounce of warmness from Simon's reassurances.
I shouldn't be here.
In the blink of an eye, you're sitting up and his hold is removed from off of your face as you scramble to the other side of the couch, wincing as a harsh dizziness floods your senses and the desire to vomit springs upon you.
'N- no, no, no,' you quickly say, lifting your head with narrow eyes, pulling the fabric of Johnny's coat against your bare body as you look at the two men with teary eyes. 'How... why, why am I here? How did you get me here?' you ask in a panicked tone.
Simon looks to Johnny and Johnny looks at you.
'There was a siren on the beach—'
'Who?' you snap, 'what colour was her hair?'
'Black... bonnie, are you okay? What happened?'
'I can't be here,' you ramble, 'they're gonna do something bad, they're gonna do it all because of me and- and I—'
You begin to cry.
'I can't be here, you've got to let me go,' you beg, attempting to raise to your feet, all for the dizziness to keep you down. 'Please, please!'
You feel as though the world is ending.
Unable to escape the horror of the words expressed, you fight against yourself and the urge to spill your guts all over the floor of the living room, your tears seeping into the wound on your face.
Simon moves closer to you, placing his hand against your knee, looking up at you with teary eyes.
Reaching out your hand, you rest it against his cheek as more tears flow freely, letting out a hiccup upon being graced with the warmth of his face.
'I'm sorry,' you cry.
Placing his hand over your own, he shushes you, 'we'll talk about it once you've told us what's happened, alright sweetheart?' he asks gently, 'what happened?'
His calmness in the face of horror is unnerving, and as you look in his eyes, you spy a darkness in his eyes. You wish to be in his arms, but your temper keeps you from fulfilling the urge as you press your trembling lips together, wincing as you swallow.
'They know,' you say, looking at Simon, 'they know about you,' you choke out, 't- they think I'm a traitor and they want you dead- they want to put the entire village to death for what happened to Serelia.'
His hold tightens on your hand.
'Why didn't you want the same as them?' Johnny asks, 'very well could have put the entire village under water if y' willed it.'
'Because there are people here who don't deserve to die,' you sniffle, 'there are innocent people here a- and it isn't fair to punish them for the violence of someone else's hand,' you explain, 'they're blinded by their rage, and if I were without experience, I would be too.'
You curse the part of you which still sympathises with the people who cast you out, though, you know enough to understand who the true villain is. Not the sirens, not the humans, rather, the ignorance of both sides refusing to see the perspective of the others.
And here you are, attempting to piece together a bridge.
The pair before you don't speak and you feel your heart beating quicker as you look into the eyes of the lover you abandoned many moons ago. You spy betrayal in his gaze, though his anger is not directed towards you.
'They're gonna lead the entire village underwater,' you breath, 'I don't know when they're going to do it and I don't know how to stop them when they finally do decide they want to do it,' you say, your eyes welling with tears.
'Oh love,' Simon exhales gently.
'We won't let anythin' happen, lass, y' have my word,' Johnny reassures.
You suppose he wants you to find comfort in his words, yet, his enthusiasm only works to bruise you further; you know there's nothing either of them can do, not against the call of a siren.
'I offered to go back on land,' you whisper, 'I told them I could do it; we finally got the name if the man who killed Serelia.'
'This have somethin' to do with the man y' massacred?' Johnny asks.
'I was following the ship because I recognised him,' you answer, recalling the tone he carried while talking about the man in front of you.
Even if he hadn't been responsible for helping in her capture, you still would have been taken from off of the boat.
'He was one of the people who carried Serelia off of the beach. He deserved what became of him.'
To regret would be to forgive, and you will never forgive a man who did something so terrible.
'We crashed the boat, all but one died, and I asked him if he knew who did it. He told me he didn't know who, but he had an idea of who did it; people around here know that whoever it was is close to the guard.'
Both Johnny and Simon share a look.
'Y' not saying you think it's one of us, are you?' Simon asks, to which you quickly shake your head.
'No, no, I know neither of you would do that- not even Kyle or Price would stoop that low... it's the one who was supposed to look after her, Si'. It was the one who told us she was dead that morning.'
The silence in the room is deafening.
Simon's hand moves away from yours as he slowly begins to stand up, his eyes falling back to the staircase. 'Rhys?' Johnny says, his eyes blown, 'he said he liked her.'
Your eyes stay on Simon's as he clenches his fists, the mellow look which has been on his face since he saw you melting off. Trailing his tongue across the inside of his mouth, you gulp thickly viewing his anger.
'I'm gonna fuckin' kill him,' he coldly says.
It's not a threat, rather, a promise.
Neither you or Johnny say anything, instead, the pair of you share a look before your eyes fall back to Simon who is already making his way out of the living room towards the staircase.
If you speak now, you fear the repercussions of stopping him from doing what he's set his mind on doing; while you never saw anything during your first time on land, you're not unknown to the truth of who he truly is.
'Simon,' you blurt out, unable to fight against your thoughts as you look up the stairs.
He stops in his tracks, heaving out a heavy breath before turning to you. You can hardly make him out in the dim light as he moves, devoid of all the light which makes his so ethereal.
Still, in the light or darkness, he's still the man who holds you heart.
'D- Don't act on that anger now,' you quietly say, 'the only way of saving the village from them is to give them what they want... if they want Rhys, they'll want him alive, and if they don't want me, then I'll stay here,' you say through a laboured breath.
Your heartaches at the thought of leaving your home, leaving the grave of your mother abandoned for all the others to swarm. But, if they so willingly cast you out, then, you suppose they were never truly family in the first place.
'Just... stay with me tonight, yeah?' you ask, 'don't want you to do something harsh when you're not thinking straight; he'll get what he deserves, just not tonight.'
You hear him shift as Johnny sets the lit candle down onto the stand beside the sofa. 'She's right, Lt, can't be doin' something that will keep you away from your bonnie; been away from each other long enough, hey?'
He moves away from the darkness, coming back into the light. You offer him a smile as he places his hand against your shoulder with a short nod. Placing your hand over his, you melt into his hold. Johnny looks at the pair of you with a smile on his face.
'We'll sort out a plan in the morning about what we'll do,' Simon says, 'figure out how we're gonna get him to the sirens, and if they agree with the deal, then we'll offer him up and forget this entire thing ever happened.'
'Aye,' Johnny says with a firm nod, approaching the door, 'make sure y' get her cleaned up, I'll meet the pair of you at the bakery tomorrow,' he continues, pulling the door open, looking over his shoulder at the pair of you.
Simon nods his head. 'Affirmative.'
As the man disappears into the night, the door closes with a click, and for the first time in months, you're finally alone with the man. You don't miss the breath that escapes him, in fact, you grow cold at the sound as his hand leaves your shoulder.
'Si'—'
'Need to get you cleaned up,' he abruptly says, 'we can talk about everything once I know you're okay, yeah? You need to get cleaned up before anything, c'mon.'
Your teeth sink into your bottom lip and you fight against the urge to defy his request. Though, recalling the grey bags under his eyes, you find you're raising from where you're sitting. As he said, you can talk about it later, and for now, you find yourself thankful that he simply wants to enjoy your company.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
'I'm sorry,' you whisper as soon as your head hits the pillow. Oddly, as you watch the man move in the moonlight, it's difficult to even process the fact that you have been gone for so long.
Your hair is slightly damp your bath, and while the wound on your face feels as though it has its own heartbeat, the dressing covering it keeps it from weeping freely.
'I just didn't know what to do, and- and I was so angry with myself and I didn't trust—'
'Your hand was forced, love,' Simon utters, laying on is side to look at you. 'I just wish you would have woke me up or left me a note- something to let me know that you were okay.'
Your heart drops at the thought of the months of misery he has suffered through by your hand.
Even though to you it seemed necessary, you know better than to impose your own views onto the man who was left wandering where you had disappeared off to for months on end.
Your absence was necessary yet cruel.
'I know, I know I should have and I'm sorry for not saying something to you,' you respond, reaching your hand out to grab his much larger one. He grabs your hand, wrapping his fingers around yours with a sigh. 'I wish I never left.'
'You did what you thought was right in the moment an' I'd be a prick for telling you you were in the wrong for doin' it,' mumbles the man, 'y' had to figure stuff out. All that matters now is that you're back.'
'I won't be goin' anywhere anytime soon if you're planning on staying with me,' you say, 'could kick me to the streets for everything I've put you through; I wouldn't blame you for doing it.'
'Wouldn't ever dream about it, sweetheart,' he says.
You watch as he scoffs before moving towards you, letting go of your hand to grasp your waist, pulling you towards him.
Shuffling closer, you smile as you press your lips against you, a flurry of butterflies swirling in your stomach a you feel his hand on your waist tighten.
All the months of pain melt in the matter of moments as the pair of you hold each other. It's as though the pair of you have been apart for multiple lives, plagued with the memory of each other, until eventually meeting again in this life.
Tears pool in your eyes, your hand pressing against the side of his face, snaking around to tug at his hair as he bites down on your bottom lip.
A muffled moan escapes you, trailing off into a whine when he pulls away from you. A trail of saliva keeps the pair of you connected as your eyes flicker from his mouth back to his eyes.
'I've missed you so much,' you confess, blinking back the tears as he smiles at you. 'So fucking much- there hasn't been a day I haven't thought about you.'
His hand against your waist loosens as he moves his hand under the white shirt he dressed you in, moving between your thighs.
'Missed you too,' he confesses, his index finger brushing over your clothes cunt with a sigh. 'Wanna show you how much I've missed you,' he utters, pressing the tip of his finger into against your clit.
You comply with a kiss, a small giggle escaping you as he pulls you on top of him. Hands sliding down your waist, you begin to undress, all for one of his hands to catch your wrist. 'Keep it on, sweetheart,' he rasps, 'like seein' you in my clothes.'
Colour rushes to your cheeks as you nod your head, hands gripping the waistband of his underwear, pulling them down.
There's no need for anything, the desire to feel him inside you after so many months obscuring any other sense of yours.
You need him and he needs you.
Tugging down his underwear, goosebumps form on your skin when you hear him grunt as you pull them further down his thighs, freeing his cock from his boxers. You sit for a moment, jumping when you feel his hands squeeze your hips.
'Spit in your hand, love,' he instructs.
You feel his eyes on you as you scrunch your nose up at the request.
'What?'
'Listen to me and I'll help you, yeah?' he asks, 'now spit in your hand.'
Your entire face is warm as you hold your hand out in front of your, spitting into it. 'Good girl,' he breaths, 'now wrap your hand around my cock.'
Listening to him, you reach out, wrapping your hand around him. He hisses as you do so, and you pause upon seeing his reaction, fearful that you've done something wrong. 'That's right,' he utters, as precum pools at the top of your fist as you feel him twitch in your hold, 'no more your hand up and down f'r me, love, get me ready for that pretty little cunt of yours.'
A sinful sound emits as you begin to move your hand up and down his cock, your slick hand moving up and down with ease. You feel his thighs tense below you as you move a hand between your legs, your mouth turning dry from the wetness pooling in your underwear.
'That's desperate, princess?' Simon grunts with a smile on his face. You feel the urge to wipe it off of his face, though, you nod your head in agreement, knowing better than to deny something you so desperately want. 'Pull your panties to the side,' he instructs, 'not touchin' that pussy of yours; you're gonna come from my cock an' nothin' else,' he gruffly says.
Letting go of his cock, you do at he asks of you, a small yelp escaping you as he pulls your forward, his cock pressing against you folds as he sighs.
There's a temperament, a desire lingering to keep you on top, though, as he looks at you with your swollen lips and red face, he relents, moving you so you're lying on your bak with him over you.
'Got plenty of time for all that,' he utters, pressing his tip against your hole.
You clench around nothing, shifting beneath him as he presses his lips against yours.
It's different from the last time, you see something different in his eyes as he pushes into you, the delightful sting from many moons ago returning. Arching your back off of the bed, your whimper against his mouth.
'That's it,' he whispers, 'oh fuck.'
Your legs tighten around his waist, a few stray tears escaping from your eyes. It's a mixture of pain, pleasure, and joy. To be back in his arms after so much time a part is a gift in itself, for him to want you back is another. Your mind is racing as you sniffle, pressing another kiss against his mouth.
'Y' okay, yeah, princess? So good f'r me,' he grunts, slowly pulling out of you. More tears fall down your face as you nod your head, your eyes screwed shut as he thrusts back into you. Clicking his tongue, he pushes into you with another grunt, 'eyes on me, sweet girl,' he huffs, 'haven't waited months for you and your pretty little cunt for you to not look at me, have I?'
You open your eyes.
'That's it, there's my pretty girl.'
You clench around him upon hearing his words, legs trembling as he quickens the pace of his thrusts. The head of his cock presses against your cervix and your arms home to his back, nails digging into the flesh of his back.
'I- I've missed you,' you choke out, unable to account for any other emotion as he fucks into you.
You're crying at this point, the tears on the right side of your face soaking into the dressing as he continues to his all the right spots, stretching you out perfectly.
He's ruined you for anyone else, though it doesn't matter; you know you'll never need anyone else when you have him.
'Missed you too, love,' he states through clenched to teeth , 'missed waking up to you and seeing you, but you're not gonna go anywhere now, you're mine.'
'I am, I am,' you dumbly cry, 'no one else's, all yours forever and ever.' 'm sorry for ever leaving you.'
Keeping himself steady with one hand, he brings his other hand to grab your forearm, pulling one of your arms away from his back, taking it into his hold. Your legs tighten around his waist as a crude squelch sounds in the room, h
'Fuck,' you gasp, your hole tightening around him.
'That’s right, love,' he groans, his lips ghosting over your shoulder, his words were low and sickeningly needy, 'you’re so fucking tight,' he moans, resulting in a hiccuped moan escaping you.
Both of you greedily take whatever pleasure came from your messy movements, sweat dropping down your forehead as you tighten you hold on his hand, writhing below him as he continues to hit the spot which has you seeing stars.
'Gonna make sure I'm always here,' you whisper letting out another breathy moan.
Simon maintains a pleasurable pace, a crude slapping sounding in his bedroom, though neither of you care, and through stinging eyes and aching muscles, you admire him in the light of the moon, taking into account all the flaws on his face, the remnants of mistreatment and burdens, swearing to yourself you will never left another pale scar appear on his body for as long as the pair of you live.
'Not gonna let you leave me now, sweetheart,' he begins, staring down at you, his fringe wet with sweat, stray strands sticking to his forehead. 'Gonna keep you safe, fuck,' he schemes, a subconscious smile forming on your face, listening to him speak. 'Make sure y' never want for anything, only me.'
He growls such words with intent and possessiveness, and in the heat of the moment, you're convinced you need no one but him.
And as the tension in your stomach grows tighter, the brunet hit a spot which almost makes you scream, you drag your hand down his back, leaving lines of red behind as you do so. 'And you'll let me do all of that f'r you,' he chuckles.
'I would,' you whimper, 'fuck, I'm close, please,' you beg, as your thighs begin to tremble, you grip on his hand tightening as you press your head back against the pillow.
'Go on, sweetheart,' he says, 'cum for me.'
He winces slightly as he feels your nails press crescents into his skin, his pace growing messy and sporadic as he chases after his own release.
Squeezing your eyes shut, you let out a brittle sob as an orgasm rips through your body.
'Fuck, that's it, sweetheart' he moans, 'I love you,' he grunts out, pressing into your, your cunt against his pubic bone as his hands tremble.
You barely compute the words passing his lips, and in the daze of your release, you continue to cry as he fucks you despite you being overstimulated, a dark groan escaping from the back of his throat as you feel strings of cum paint your insides.
'I- I love you too, so much,' you sniffle, your head falling against the pillow in exhaustion, finding joy in his hold of you and the pleasure which has washed over your body, rendering all your sense his.
Little worries find you in the aftermath, the pair of you much too tired to discuss what can wait for you in the morning, and the only thing that matters to you in the wake of your orgasm is his body being pressed against yours as you slowly drift off knowing that, even if it is just for tonight, you're secure in his hold.
Here, you find a single moment is comparable to an eternity of touches.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
In the morning, you find yourself sitting outside of the bakery with the ugly green dress you grew to despise during your first time out of the shore, and as you sit beside Simon tugging at the skirt, you startle when he firmly tugs it down, placing his hand down on your thigh, over the skirt to keep in place.
He does so without even turning his attention to you, and even when you turn to offer him a brief look, he doesn't move, keeping his eyes trained on Johnny as he sips from his mug of tea.
'Kyle said he saw another one,' says the man with the mohawk, 'seems they're waiting near the shore for something to happen, or, they're planning on making their move a lot soon than we thought.'
Your face aches as you chew, gulping your pastry down before speaking. 'They wouldn't act so quickly,' you say, 'they want me to get a taste of this before they take it away; when Raithe is angry, she's unforgiving.'
'That's the lass I saw on the beach, right?' Johnny asks, 'the one with the black hair an' teeth as sharp as daggers.'
'Yeah, she's the one who did this to me,' you say, pointing towards the fingerprints around your neck and the clean dressing stuck to your face. Taking a bite out of your pastry, Simon leans further into the table, keeping his hand pressed firmly against your thigh.
'I've put him on patrol tonight,' he says quietly, 'we'll get him alone, call for them to have him and then that will be the end of it.'
'Y' really think it's gonna be that easy?' Johnny asks, 'they seem pretty pissed, don't think they'd really leave us alone that easily.'
'There's nothing else we can do,' you say, 'unless you wanna go into the water and pull them all out one by one and put a knife through their heads, that is.'
Simon's grip on your thigh tightens.
'Cut their tongue out and throw them back into the water if they try anythin',' he cooly states, 'can't sing then, become nothin' but a fish with claws, hardly a threat. They can suffer for all I care.'
Something stirs in your gut as he says so, and while you feel as though you need to keep the women you devoted your life to, you find yourself torn with the desire of seeing the man being so lethal- of seeing how far he would go to keep you safe.
'Sounds like a plan, Lt,' Johnny responds, 'this stayin' between us?'
'Affirmative,' Simon confirms, 'Gaz an' Price don't need to know about it 'cause it'll only cause more trouble if the Captain finds out about it; he won't let us do it.'
'Then we do it tonight, get rid of him and wipe our hands of him,' you say with a grin, 'about time that son of a bitch got what he deserves.'
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
In the midst of the night, you travel down the steps of the shore alone keeping your eyes peeled as you tread down the shore towards the sand. Your hands tremble in the breeze as you feet grace the sand, te rolling of the tide whispering for your return.
You stay unmoved by the moon and her red glow as you push forward towards the sea, holding your hand against your face as it aches.
All the smiling proved to be particularly poor for the placement of the mark on your face, though you push through the pain, you lips drawn together as you peer onto the surface of the water.
'I thought you'd return,' a voice calls.
You freeze.
As a wave washes up shore, the webbed hands of a woman appear, dragging her body out of the water. Her claws dig into the surface, her pointed ears twitching upon seeing you.
'You not bring your boyfriend with you?' she pouts, tilting her head to the side, 'would have been nice, y'know, meeting the family and stuff.'
'I'm not here to make small talk,' you sharply respond.
Raithe looks at you, raising her eyebrows as she looks at you.
'Oh?' she laughs, 'then please enlighten me.'
'I'm here to make a deal with you,' you breath, bringing your trembling hands together.
One shot or you've fucked it.
The woman's laughter booms along the sea as she rolls around on the ground, clapping her hands. 'Oh, you wanna make a deal with me now? It's a real shame what's become of you, y'know? If I didn't know any better, I'd say that boyfriend of yours has some explaining to do.'
Her comments cause your blood to boil, yet, you remain calm, looking her in the eyes. 'We have the boy who killed Serelia,' you say, clenching your fists, keeping your arms firmly placed against your side as the woman hums. 'We'll give you him and you can do what you please, forbid me the pleasure of getting to rip him to shreds for what he did to her and leave this village alone.'
'A generous offer you pose my lovely,' Raithe hums, pressing her finger against her plush bottom lip. 'You got anything else to sweeten the deal or is that it?'
'I'll never return to the ocean,' you say. 'I'll stay away, stay here on land. You can do what you please as long as it remains in the ocean and not beyond it; you know nature did not give us such a gift to act in the manner you intend to act concerning the people in this village.'
You step back from the shore, keeping the water from touching your feet.
'How is that fair?' Raithe asks, furrowing her eyebrows. 'You get to stay here and live out your life with the human you have foolishly devoted your life to while we're kept from Serelia because you buried her on land.'
'By staying here you are keeping me from the grave of my mother, Raithe,' you spit, "I know you're upset, but I have been punished enough. I'm giving you what you want- you want to kill the person who killed Serelia, don't you?'
Raithe's grin disappears from her face.
'You've been scheming so long you forget who the true murderer is. If I wanted to kill the person who killed Serelia, I would have slit your fucking throat,' she snaps, 'a human dealt the final blow but you are just as guilty for permitting it.'
'I was looking for her,' you blurt.
'If you were so committed to finding her, she would be here beside me right now, but she isn't; she's buried on the land, away from her home.'
'Simon helped me bury her on the clifftop!' you yell, chest raising and falling rapidly. 'She overlooking our home and it was him who came up with the idea in the first place- there are good humans—'
'Simon,' she repeats, 'slips off the tongue that name does.'
Your heart is pounding in your chest as you look at the wicked woman in the water. Her mocking grin renders you small, fragile, and you realise your mistake in mentioning the name of the man.
'I must see the man you speak of, see if he's a good match for you or if you could do better. Perhaps he would be a good friend for the water, hm?' she teased, bowing her head as another chuckle escapes her.
The crunch of sand alerts the pair of you, and as you look over your shoulder, you catch both Simon and Johnny walking along the shore, Rhys in the middle of them as he fights against their hold with his hands tied in front of him.
A delighted squeal escapes the woman lying in the sand as she catches sight of the tall man in the skull mask. 'Oh, I've seen you!' she exclaims, 'sitting on the beach a lot, hey? One might say you belong in the water with the amount of time you've spent here.'
'Shut it,' you snap, turning your attention to the three men standing behind you.
When your eyes meet with Rhys' you find you heart urges you to disobey the terms of your own deal, ripping him from the arms of the men, all to have the satisfaction of watching him crying and fight as he drowns in an inch of water.
Yet, even that isn't fitting for him.
His cries are muffled behind the gag in his mouth and Johnny does you the favour of pulling it out of his mouth. As he opens his mouth, he looks at you with wide eyes. 'I- I fuckin' knew it!" he exclaims, 'I knew I wasn't dreaming when I saw you run into the sea that night.'
'You killed Serelia,' you snap, crossing your arms over your chest.
'Didn't think it was that difficult to figure out,' he says, 'no one else knew where she was... well, not until you had your screaming and crying fit outside the cabin; that was a—'
He's stopped as Simon shoves him to the ground. He lands with a thud, all the air escaping his lung as he moans out in pain. Placing his boot on top of the mans head, his face is pressed into the wet sand as he turns to address the woman in the water.
'We got y' the one you want,' he sharply says, 'you take him and you leave.'
'Or?' the woman asks,.
'I cut your tongue out and feed it to the dogs in the village,' he snaps.
Rhys' cries are muffled as Raithe looks Simon in the eyes. Your eye twitches at the prolonged silence, though, when she whistles you find your nerves escaping you.
'A few months ago, you would have had his head for speaking to one of your own like that,' Raithe sneers looking at you, 'but love has your mind warped, my sweet urchin, yes it does,' she scoffs, her eyes narrowing as she turns her attention down towards the water. 'You have yourself a deal, Simon,' she says with a smile.
Relieving his boot from the head of the sobbing man on the ground, Rhys picks his head up, fat tears rolling down his face as he writhes on the ground, attempting to push himself up off of the ground. 'P- Please, I'm sorry,' he sobs, snot trailing down his upper lip as more heads appear from out of the water.
You're far from envious of his position when his shoulders are grabbed. Though, you long to be in the water for what is about to happen.
His screams are hoarse and rough as he's ripped from his home, and as you walk back to stand beside Johnny and Simon. Rhys claws and fights to stay on land as Raithe pulls him further and further towards the water.
Other webbed hands appear and the shrill shriek the man lets out is cut off by a hand covering his mouth as he's dragged into the water.
Upon his disappearance, you allow a breath to escape your mouth as you lean against Simon, rubbing your tired eyes. For months you have dreamt of this very moment, the moment the man who caused so much trouble is finally met with the punishment he deserves, and when his hand breaks the surface of the water again, you grin at the sight of the sea turning red, chunks of his clothing surfacing.
As savage as sharks are the sirens.
'It's done,' you mumble, turning away from the scene.
Simon looks down at you, 'you wanna go home?' he asks.
You nod your head, as the three of you begin to walk up the beach, your blood running cold as a familiar cackle catches your attention, though, you do not turn to address the woman. Instead, you catch Simon's hand in yours pushing further up the beach as Raithe calls out to the three of you.
'Lovely meeting ya, Simon! Hope to see you again some other time!'
His hold on your hand tightens just as it had done during the night before as you walk away from the sea with him by your side, never intending to let go of him ever again.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
It's as though you never left him, and every waking moment you spend with him is a blessing. How a human can be a home is a strange concept to you, though, its an oddity that you're fond of.
'Are you gonna eat your dinner or are you going to keep staring at me, sweetheart?' asks the man with a laugh.
Dropping your head, you look down at the plate of food you helped him prepare, your cheeks flushing with colour.
The wound left by your absence is but a wilting scab at this point, the skin beneath unmarked by the actions of your past for the pair of you have an understanding of you where your loyalties lie, and as you pick your head back up to look at him, you understand that your loyalties lie with one another.
'I don't know,' you mumble, 'difficult to take my eyes off of you.'
He grunts at your words, picking his fork up from the side of his plate. 'Your foods going to get cold,' he warns.
You pick your fork up, rolling your eyes, 'you're no fun.'
He lets out a short laugh, 'of course not, love. Got a job to stick to after all.'
'Not while you're with me you don't,' you say.
'Once a siren, always a siren,' he comments.
Setting your fork down, you grab a boiled potato off of your plate, throwing it at him. Unfortunately, he's aware of your plot and manages to duck of of the way before it hits him.
A small laugh escapes you as you're quick to push your chair out, raising to your feet as he does the same. A squeal escapes you are you rush out of the kitchen into the living room with him hot on your trail.
Sprinting up the steps to his bedroom, you shriek as he grabs you and pulls you against his chest. 'Let me gooooo,' you whine, writhing in his hold, 'it was an accident, it slipped out of my hand I was literally about to eat it!'
You land on the bed with a thud, continuing to laugh as he looms over you, his forehead pressed against yours as you look up at him with a bright smile on your face.
'You've got to believe me.'
'You picked it up and you threw it at me,' he answers back, 'I know y' clumsy, sweetheart, but fuck me, are you really that bad?' he asks, pressing his forehead against yours.
Bringing your hands up, you hold either side of his face, looking into his eyes with a sigh. 'I love you,' you say, abandoning the joke the pair of you were tangled in. His stoic expression shatters as he smiles down at you, placing a chaste kiss on your lips.
'I love you too,' he utters, before placing his lips back on yours.
In the safety of his arms and his home, you live in high spirits as you know, even when the four walls and the roof are not there to shelter you from a storm, the man with his lips against yours and a hand under your skirt will always be there for you whenever you need him.
Selfishly, you hope he's there forever and ever all for you and only you as you cherish every single part of him.
The regrets from your actions in the past remain on you in the form of the scar on your cheek, though, he sees you no different as he watches your naked body dripping with sweat in the confines of your bedroom, even when you're simply sitting in the library reading a book.
All the time his eyes are on you as though you're the only girl in the world and in return, he knows that you're eyes remain on him and only him.
'You're gonna be the death of me,' he breathes, as you shift, feeling his fingers pressed against your hole.
A smirk appears on your lips.
'Only if it's by your hand I die and no one else's.'
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
'Simon.'
In the dead of night he wakes to the faint sound of a whisper.
It's something calling for him, a song which shakes the very vibrations of his home, and as he opens his eyes, he captures you sleeping soundly beside him, though, he doesn't care for you as he pushes himself up and out of bed.
His headaches and he wobbles as he climbs from out of his bed. It's as though his body is on autopilot, permitting whatever strange force is pushing him to proceed with his usual routine as he gets up from out of bed.
He walks as though he's a monster, devoid of all consciousness, his limps sluggish and flimsy as he pulls on his clothes for work. You don't move and inwardly, he's unsure why he's doing so; the moon is out, full and round as she peers through the open window, and he knows it's still going to be a while before he has to leave for work.
Still, the urge pushes him to get ready for the day, and he reaches for the skull mask settled against the table near the window of his bedroom, tying it around his head.
You remain sleeping in bed as he moves downstairs, determined to find the noise which causes his head to pound. It feels as though someone is pressing their fingers into his head all to see which part of the brain bleeds the most.
The answer is all of it, though the voice continues to pick away at his skull with such persistence he's rendered aggravated as he walks through the door.
His entire body is on fire as he treads the streets he was walked so many times, though his feet drag against the roads of the silent village, arms firmly pressed against his sides as he presses on with tired eyes and a dry mouth.
The voice changes its tune, no longer calling his name, istead, speaking words.
'Foolish mortal men.'
In a conscious state he would be questioning the words addressed to him in such a manner, he would be questioning why he walks with the intent of making it to the water, and he would be returning back to his home with an ache in his chest for ever thinking of leaving you alone.
But he doesn't.
Instead, he drags his feet with determination coursing through his veins.
To the ocean he must go; the voice is calling him and he cannot fight against the words bouncing off of the streets of the village.
'Sinking into the watery depths of the...'
It grows tired as he edges closer to the water, the crashing of the water flooding his ears, coaxing his burning mind with a brief cure. t's not enough, however, his mouth is dry and his tongue burns, eyes longing for the fiery thirst to subside.
His entire body feels as though it's on fire, and the sea stares back at him, water washing up the shore as the arms of a human would when offering a friend a hug.
Something else is staring too.
'Sirens den.'
The voice is oh so soft, almost a whisper as he makes it onto the beach. The village seems so puny in comparison to the greatness of the vast ocean and he wonders why he ever bothered living on land when the ocean i right her at his fingertips.
Shrugging his cloak from off of his shoulders, he releases himself from the burden of the confines of that stupid cloak, the balaclava from around his mouth falling to the ground after.
It all feels so freeing, to fall under the command of the great sea, to see the beauty in the very thing he has despised for so long. Such an outlook is a blessing, he finds.
It's necessary. It's constant.
He is nothing in comparison of the ocean and her greatness.
No one is anything but flesh and bone existing in one place at one time while she is there, her arms wrapped around the entirety of the planet.
How foolish he has been.
'For a woman in the sea,'
He thinks of you and all you have done for him, how you have freed him, though he finds you and your existence pale in existence of te water which invites him in with open arms.
At first, you were difficult to deal with, untrusting.
But she isn't, she guides him and she's leading him to safety- to the place he belongs. Such a blessing she presents him with and everything you have done for him is nothing as she cools his burning flesh.
It's better than any orgasm he has reached while in bed with you, so inviting that he proceeds to walk into the water deeper. Nothing is enough, her presence is too little. He needs more of her to settle the dull ache in his head and he wades through the water with the intent of finding such.
'is never just a friend.'
The tune stops.
Suddenly, the sea is no longer in his favour and he's turned away with a cold rush of water covering him.
A sharp gasp escapes him as he looks around him, the water up to his waist, waves crashing against his bulky frame as he looks around with stinging eyes. His blood runs cold as he turns his attention back to the village. Then his eyes fall back onto the water.
He knows better than to trust the situation, wasting no time to turn away from the distant abyss of the water, pushing himself through the water all to make it back to land.
To make it back to you.
The depth of the water is relieved, sinking from his waist to mid thigh.
A grunt escapes him as a surge of agony hits him with the fierce intent of keeping him from getting home and he lands with a splash into the water as razor sharp nails are pulled from out of his his thigh.
'Unfaithful scum,' utters a voice as hands from all angles poke from out the water, grabbing him as he attempts to fight his way from out of their hold.
They're merciless as the hold him and keep him to the water while his heart and mind long to be back in bed beside you. He fights and fights, though in his drowsy state he's far too out of it to do anything.
'She's better off without you, Simon.'
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ☾ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
You awake in bed alone, a banging at the door ruining your brain. However, you don't let it distract you as you spend a moment looking at the empty spot in the bed with a frown.
It's miserable to wake without him in the morning as you have grown fond of spending time with him, lying in bed, drawing patterns on his bare chest, listening to his many stories, or simply just basking in the heat of him.
The bed is cold without him and you shiver as you push yourself up, scoffing at the manic knocks against the door. It's persistent, nearly urgent. You pick up the pace, wrapping Simon's shirt around you as you rush down the stairs to the front door.
Grabbing the handle you pull it open, 'about fuckin' time, Si', you're—'
'What?' you blurt out, looking at Johnny and Gaz standing at the door, 'he's at the station, isn't he?'
The pair of them look at each other before looking at you.
'Nae, lass,' Johnny says, his mouth falling as he looks at you. 'We've been looking for him.'
Your blood runs cold.
He's probably with the Lord or something, it wouldn't be the first time he's be asked for a favour by him.
'Where have you checked?' you ask, quickly slipping on your sandals.
'We've been up and down all the streets to his usual spots, we've even checked the Lords house and he hasn't seen him either... this isn't like him,' Kyle explains, 'he's committed to his job, he wouldn't just not show up and—'
'Have you checked the beach?' you blurt.
Both of them shake their heads and with that, you're running out of the house, rushing to towards the beach.
A wave of panic washes over you, and as you rush down the main street of the village with teary eyes, you feel as though you're rushing to Serelia all over again, only, this time, Simon isn't behind you to comfort you.
People blurt out curses as you push yourself through the crowds, bounding towards the beach just as you did when you returned all those months ago.
Your chest burns by the time you make it to the steps, and as you run down, you stop at the sight of a black mound on the shore. Gulping thickly, you rush towards the pile of fabric, reaching down to retrieve it with a trembling hand.
It's his cloak.
Tearing your eyes away from it, you look down the rest of the beach, dropping the fabric as you follow a scattered trail of belongings. You pass by his balaclava which has been covered in sand.
The wind beats against you, pushing your hair back as you fight for your breath. There are pieces of him covering the beach, just as Serelia's scales covered the floor in the room of that dingy little cabin.
All hope is crushed as, right beside the water you spy a small chunk of bone sitting in the sand. You don't wait as you rush towards the water, spying the shape of his skull mask sitting right before the mercy of the water.
It's as though you're in a nightmare you cannot wake from.
You can't breathe.
As the realisation hits you and the skull mask sitting on the shore stares back at you, you fall to your knees, your wide as you look out at the murky sea, falling onto your stomach at your fingertips ghost the skull sitting against the shore.
A jagged breath escapes you as you pull your hand away, unable to catch your breath as you fall backwards onto you bottom, hands pressed against the sand. Rushed steps appear behind you, though you don't budge, nor do you flinch as a firm hand is placed on your shoulder.
Johnny appears in front of you, his mouths muffled as a tear slips from your twitching eye, staring out into the water all to see Raithe staring at you in the distance, a wicked from forming on her face as she pulls a skull mask from out of the water, holding it up by the silk string he used to tie it around his head with.
Your eyes fall back to the skull sitting on the surface, you breathing quickening at you turn your head to the side, heaving as a cold numbness floods your sense. Your tremble as you force out a sob, your throat tightening.
The skull meters away from you is not his mask.
It's him.
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𝙼𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝
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TAGS: (If you would like to be added to the tag list let me know!) @forever-twenty-two-years-old @phantomreadsandreblogs @iizx7y
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200 notes · View notes
dior-roses · 4 months
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obsession, auston matthews
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ꨄ︎ pairing: stepbro!auston matthews x reader
ꨄ︎ summary: he's a man obsessed, his mind replays any and every interaction he's had the honor to have with you. because let's face it, in his mind, you are more than just his step-sister, you are a goddess in his eyes. and who is he to not steal something for his earnings?
ꨄ︎ requested: yes/no
ꨄ︎ warnings: obsessive behavior, kind of dark(?), mentions of smut (like barely any, in my eyes), stepcest (do not condone, in fact, am highly against it), auston's lowkey got a god complex, a hint of reader being innocent, implied age gap (reader is 18!)
ꨄ︎ author's note: it's been so long since i've written anything and im so insecure in this so please love it! (give me validation). a self indulgent auston blurb (?) that came to mind when i saw this slutty little edit of him. please forgive me for any grammar mistakes to typos, for i wrote this while i was saying hello to my friend mary jane. much love to every one of you who decides to read this mess of a story, and shall we meet again!🤍
he should've felt disgusted with himself. his skin should be crawling with his current demeanor. the hairs in the back of his neck should be standing up straight when the idea briefed over his mind during the excruciating quiet family dinner that your parents force you guys to have nightly.
but he wasn't.
in fact, he was quite proud of himself, with how far he's gotten into this 'plan' of his. here he was, in the midst of the day while you were at school, attending your one out of only three classes you had to attend your senior year, standing in the middle of your bedroom.
he had taken the afternoon off, canceling his strength training, his excuse being that he was sick. along with his place of employment he texted you, the one thing that had been occupying his mind ever since he laid eyes on you. your parents having you guys meet, thus starting his obsession.
to their shock, neither of you were angry when your father announced that they had eloped. both of you sat across from the newly weds in a low light restaurant, with pristine christmas ornaments hanging from the ceiling. a little annoyed, maybe; at least you were. you never got the chance to ask him how he felt about the whole ordeal. but from what you could see, he was perfectly contempt with the major life change.
he shifts in your room, walking backwards until the back of his calfs hit the edge of you bed, causing him to plop down harshly with an anticipated huff. your pure vanilla sent traveled to his nostrils, and himself becoming encapsulated with only you. his hands laid stoic along the tops of his thighs, even though he wanted nothing more than to palm himself through his pants. he was already half hard, just by your scent.
his eyes lingered to your nightstand, a ghost of a smile tugging on his lips at just how perfectly girly it was. a picture of you laughing with your friends in your camp counselor shirt from the past summer, your forgotten airpods, which he thought about how irritated you were when you figured that out, a small pout on your lips. god, he wanted nothing more than to feel yours against his.
he would be happy if it was just on his cheek, as a thankful gesture.
as he admired your dimples through the glass of the picture frame, he could help but let curiosity get the best of him. that's how he got here in the first place, right? his eyes trailed down to the drawer that was painted a darker color than the rest of the dresser, to perfectly match the rest of your room.
he hoped one day he could see if your room truly matched you– light perfectly balanced with dark. he already knew the light part was too good to be true, with your big eyes that light up at the sight of him, but only enough that he would notice. the way you blush if he gets too close to you, not that he creeps you out or anything, but the fact that it was a man besides your dad that was this close to you. even if it was your step brother.
you didn't know why you felt this way around auston, you didn't know what made him different from any other boy you thought was pretty. bust auston was so, so, pretty that you couldn't help but redirect your eyes to your shoes when he caught your burning gaze. your skin burned from what seemed like hour from when he would place his hands on your waist to 'move you out of the way'. and it had only grown with time, with how nice he is to you and the names he calls you that he doesn't seem to do with anyone else. 'princess', 'baby', or even 'doll' when he's showing you how to swing a golf club, on those rare, rare, days when he could finally persuade you to come with him to the country club just down the street. he even bought you your own little golf girl outfit, all baby pink and white, to perfectly match the picture of you he has implemented into his mind.
and you had thought you were going to look ridiculous, and you did, until you saw the way he looked at you as you walked down stairs where he was waiting for you. a certain glint was in his eyes the entire day, and you couldn't help but squirm in the passengers seat as he was driving. trying to descreetly press your thighs together to at least try to ease the pressure and throbbing that was happening down there. you didn't know what caused the throbbing but it was so strange and unfamiliar that you couldn't help but sniffle lightly, suppressing a whine at how uncomfortable you felt. but you didn't completely hate it. especially not when auston was right next to you, his large frame blocking the street lights that passed by through his window, his side profile creating the perfect tattoo of a shadow on your face, one that you didn't want to go away.
of course he had noticed his little girl writhing around in the passenger seat of his car. her soft thighs pressing against each other, all supple and smooth from imperfections. he needed to be suffocated by them, the image he wanted to die from was your shaking body from all the pleasure he was causing you, tears streaming down your flushed cheeks as he sucked you clit in between his full lips.
he had completely forgotten he was in heaven, (your room), when he felt the pulse from his balls that he was about the cum, all from the thoughts of your innocence and his hand that found his hard on cock through his sweatpants. he didn't want to do that yet, not without the one thing that caused him to be here in the first place.
the most obvious place would be the dresser, so he head towards that area of your room, placed right next to your closet. and surprise, surprise! the top drawer just happened to be your underwear drawer. all filed with pale colored bras and panties, not that they were old, but because those were the colors you loved; all muted and quiet, instead of vibrant and loud. you was shocked you had some lace and he would've gone for those, but that's not what he was going for.
his mind craved something less out there and more reserved. something that he had seen tossed in the washer with his colored laundry load, a pair of your painted that were red with white little hearts scattered across the cotton material. a throaty groan came from his as he felt his cock twitch, being retrained by the boxers and pants he wore.
he could only imagine your ass being perfect covered in white little hearts, or even getting a glimpse of them as you sit down next to him on the couch in the living room after a long day at school. your school uniform only urging on his obsession– a short little navy blue pleaded skirt with thigh high socks, and the cutest little best he had ever seen. the way the thick knitted wool spread across the curves of your breasts.
god, he was nothing but a man obsessed.
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siampie · 3 months
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Risk and Reward||Chapter 1: When I Met You
Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 4.1k
Summary: You have a hard time settling into your new life but with new acquaintances and newfound friendships. You slowly find your footing.
Warnings/tags: 18+ contains smut (not sure, don’t know how to write it but I’ll try), angst, fluff, mutual pining, idiots in love, childhood trauma
A/N: So, this is a first for me. Please be indulgent. I am no stranger to writing fiction. I’ve done it before just not on this platform. Also, this is my first time writing in 2nd POV and for Matt Murdock. There isn’t much of him in this chapter but I hope the small bits I have is as close as it is to his character. I did what I always do before writing fiction, read other writers' work and see how they capture the character and watched videos or episodes to get a good feel of the character. So, I hope you will like it. Feedback is welcome. And just enjoy! Also English is not my first language.
Chapter List || Next Chapter
Masterlist || Join my tag list
Dividers by @cafekitsune
Song the title is referring to:
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You gave me a reason for my being
And I love what I’m feelin’
You gave me a meaning to my life
Yes, I’ve gone beyond existing
And it all began when I met you
“Another day, another week.” You whispered to yourself as you stepped in the building where you work. You smiled quickly at the receptionist before making your way to the elevator. After you made the big move across the states, you were lucky to land a job as a proofreader in a publishing house. It wasn’t your dream job but it was the next best thing.
For as far as you can remember, you have always been taking care of your family. Many expectations and responsibilities were put on your shoulders from a very young age. So, when your brother stepped in and decided to move your father in with him, you felt some relief. A load was being taken off of your shoulders. You loved your family. But over the years, you had started to resent them slightly. You resented your father for being sick. You resented him for taking out his bad moods on you. You resented your siblings because they get to live their lives. You resented them for leaving you behind in the dust. You knew you loved them but you resented them. And you didn’t want to hate them. So, you left.
You made the move to Hell’s Kitchen, six months ago and you had big plans. First of which, was to properly kickstart your life. You didn’t think it would be easy. You knew it would have been a challenge but you didn’t think it would be that hard. After six months, you thought you would have made some friends or at least some acquaintances. But shy as you were, and as cautious as you were, making friends did not come easy for you.
You dropped your bag on the ground next to your chair. And dropped your coat on the back of it. Your desk was already stacked with manuscripts that needed to be proofread. You always started your day the same, first you read your emails and answered the most important ones. Then came coffee and then came reading with a red pen. You were to review any typos that may have somehow slipped past the author and the copy editor. You were also to review for issues like kerning and stacking and whether the running head is consistent. Proofreading was the last step before publication. You knew it was an important step, so you did it thoroughly. And you did it well. At least, you thought you did. Your boss had not complained about your work so far. And you took it as a good sign.
One of your coworkers stopped by your desk and softly called your name. You looked up at her. You knew her, you had barely interacted with her a few days before. She had long, red hair, that you loved, and legs for days. Her name was Amelia. A few nights ago, as you were leaving after workhours, she was standing outside of the building. A cigarette between her lips as she was looking for something.
“Excuse me?” She stopped you. You turned to her. “Do you have a lighter?”
“Yeah.” You nodded quickly. Your best friend from high school, had convinced you to buy a pack of lighter once. Telling you that it was the best way to meet people and to make friends. More precisely to meet your future boyfriend. “There you go.” You handed her the lighter.
“Thanks.” She lit her cigarette before giving it back to you. She took a long drag at it. The tension in her shoulders dropped. “I needed that.”
“You’re welcome.” You smiled at her and turned to leave.
“You’re that new proofreader, aren’t you?” She asked you.
“Yeah.” And you gave her your name.
“That’s a pretty name.” She remarked. “I’m Amelia.”
“Nice to meet you.” Amelia was not a proofreader. She was an acquisitions editor. The one, literary agents would come to, to sell a book. The book landed in her hands first, and if they made it past her, they landed in yours last.
You stayed with her long after she finished her cigarette. You walked with her because it was dark out. And Hell’s Kitchen wasn’t the safest place to be after dark. And there was strength in numbers. Coincidentally, your flat and hers weren’t that far apart. So, you walked her home before going to yours.
After that, you had not seen or heard much of Amelia. You thought that was it. But there she was, talking to you.
“So, some of us are going to grab a drink after work and I thought that maybe you would love to join us?” She sat on your desk.
“It’s barely 9 and you’re already thinking about the end of the day.” You scoffed lightly.
“Well, I need something to look forward to.” Amelia laughed. “So, wanna come?”
Your default answer was ready to come out of your mouth. You were already making up excuses to not go. And then you stopped yourself. Why shouldn’t you go tonight? There was no one waiting for you at home. You had no obligations. It could be a fun night out; you could even make a few new friends. Might even start a new friendship with Amelia. After all, she came to seek you out. She wanted to invite you.
“Why?” You had not meant to ask this out loud.
“What?”
“Why invite me? We barely talked to each other? Why ask me?”
“You said you just moved here in Hell’s Kitchen, remember?” Amelia gave you a tight smile. And you nodded at her words. “I figured I do the nice thing and invite you to come with us. Since, you don’t really know anyone here.”
Now, you felt stupid. You could feel your neck and cheeks heat up with your embarrassment. Not everyone was going to hurt you. There were good people in the world, you had to remind yourself of that.
“Sorry.” You apologized quickly. “I—I would love to come.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” You nodded quickly.
“Good, I’ll come and get you when it’s time to go.”
You pressed your hands against your neck. If you could see yourself, you were sure there would be splotches of red all over it. Of course, you had to go and ask why? If “no” was your default answer most of the time, “why?” wasn’t too far behind. When your niece had first told you she loved you, your first answer wasn’t to say it back. It was to ask her why? And she had answered very sweetly: “Because you’re funny and you give the best hugs. And you always play with me.” And after that you never asked again. You only said it back. Because you did, you loved her very much.
You did not know why you did this. It was almost as though you did not believe that good things could happen to you. And if it did, it was not sincere. It was because someone wanted something from you and once, they got it. They’d leave you high and dry.
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As the end of your day was nearing. Your anxiety was starting to get the better of you. You dreaded the moment Amelia would come and pick you up. You had agreed to it earlier because you genuinely wanted to. But now, all you wanted, was to go home. Not because you were drained or overstimulated. No, because you simply did not feel like going anymore. You were hoping she would forget about you. Or at least, it would have been cancelled.
It wasn’t cancelled. And you couldn’t just bail on them. It was the first time, since you arrived in Hell’s Kitchen, that you had been invited to hang out. If you bailed on them now, you might not be invited ever again. So, you went. And who knows, you might have some fun.
“Josie’s.” You read out as you stopped in front of the bar with Amelia.
“Yeah, it’s a dive bar, really.” Amelia told you quickly. “But the drinks good enough.”
“Okay.”
She pulled you in after her. You both stopped at the bar to order your drinks and she then took you to their table. It was a small gathering. You recognized a few people, there was the receptionist; Clara. Then, there was another proofreader, you had interacted with. Barely. His name was Sebastian and some other people. You sat next to Amelia.
As soon as you sat down, they resumed their conversations. You were a silent observer. You laughed at their jokes. You listened intently to what they were saying. And you were really brief when they asked you questions about yourself. And redirected the attention on someone else as quickly as possible. You did not want the spotlight to be on you.
While your coworkers were conversing with one another, you couldn’t help but glanced around you. Your eyes travelled over the numerous patrons in the bar. Bikers, blue collar workers and some white-collar workers. They were many. The bar seemed to be quite successful.
And then your eyes landed on him.
Dark haired, with red tinted glasses and a cane. His plump lips were begging to be kissed, his jawline was to die for. His hair looked soft to the touch and you were itching to run your fingers through them. His shirt was so tight that it left nothing to the imagination. You could tell that he was well built underneath it. And his smile—oh, his smile was the most beautiful, you’ve ever laid eyes on. It lit up his whole face. Made him look younger. He looked perfect in every way.
You quickly darted your eyes away. You did not want to be caught staring. However, it was too late. Unbeknownst to you, Amelia had caught you looking.
“So, you look like you’re enjoying yourself.” Amelia said as she pulled you to the bar, to grab another drink.
“I am.” You nodded. “Thank you for inviting me.”
“No problem.” Amelia nudged your shoulder. “Would you want to do it again sometimes?”
“Yes, but can we space them out?”
“Oh, don’t worry about that.” She snorted. “It’s only when the urge strikes.” And she turned away from you. She looked over her shoulder briefly. “So, someone caught your eye.”
“What? No.” You answered quickly.
“That’s not what I saw.” She smirked at you. Josie pushed your beers towards you. “You kept staring at glasses over there.” She waved her hand towards perfect man.
“No, I did not.” You protested while pulling her hand down.
“Oh, come on!” Amelia insisted. “It’s not a crime. He’s pretty and you have eyes. It’s okay to stare a little.”
“Stop.”
“But you know what would be even better?”
“I’m going to regret this.” You rolled your eyes in annoyance. “What?”
“If you spoke to the guy. What’s the worst that could happen?”
“Rejection.” You simply answered.
“Well, rejection is part of the game.” She shrugged. You gave out a deep sigh, and put your chin in the palm of your hand. “You got nothing to lose and everything to gain.”
Nothing to lose? Easy for her to say. After all, she wasn’t the one who had her heart broken, so many times, that there was barely anything left of it. When it came to the matters of the heart, you did not think that the risks were worth it. Even if it was for a Pretty Boy.
Your eyes landed on him again, in spite of yourself. His eyes seemed to be on you and Amelia. Almost as though he was directly looking at you. But he was blind, right? That would be impossible.
“You’re staring again.” She teased you. And you turned back to the bar quickly.
“Drop it.” You told her sternly. “It’s not worth it.” Her eyebrows went into her hairline. “Plus, a guy like him would never go for a girl like me.”
“What? Beautiful and sweet?”
“I’m not beautiful. I’m not ugly but I’m not beautiful. I’m average at best.” You shook your head. “And I’m not sweet.”
Amelia looked at you baffled by your defensiveness over compliments. You acted as though she insulted you. She pushed your beer away from you.
“First, those were compliments and not insults. So, take them.” Amelia said. “And why would he go for someone else when he could go for you?”
“You’re being this nice to me over a lighter?”
“It’s not just about the lighter.” She told you. “You walked me home. You didn’t have to but you did. It was very kind and sweet. Thus, proving my point. You are sweet.”
“It was practical. My flat isn’t too far away from yours. And it was as much for your safety as it was for mine.” You shrugged. “It’s dangerous at night in Hell’s Kitchen.”
Amelia rolled her eyes and groaned in frustration. “You are going to take that compliment. I will beat it into you, if I have to.”
“That would be assault.”
“You thing you’re funny, uh?”
“I think I’m adorable.”
“Bitch, you’re testing my patience.” And that got a laugh out of you. She shook her head and laughed with you. “You really are annoying.”
“That’s more like it.” You grinned at her. “Want me to walk you home again?”
“Yeah,” She nodded and clinked her beer with yours. “We finish our drinks and then, we’re good to go.”
“Okay.”
She waved her finger at you. “But this conversation is not over.”
“What conversation?” You retorted, taking on a faux air of innocence.
Amelia glared at you which elicited a chuckle out of you. “Put a few drinks in you and you turn into a comedian. Who would have thought?”
“I could have mentioned it. Save you some time.”
“Do you need to have an answer to everything?”
“Should I answer that or--?”
“Oh, shut up.” And you snorted.
She raised her beer to her lips and toss it back. She gulped the rest of the bottle down and slammed it back onto the counter. Both of your empty bottles were left on the counter and you walked back to your small group of friends. On your way there, your eyes automatically found Pretty Boy, once again. Again, his gaze seemed to be on you and you dropped your eyes to the ground immediately. Feeling guilty that you were staring again, you let out a long sigh and muttered to yourself. “If he’s ever going for someone, it would be for Amelia.”
“There you go.” Amelia handed you your coat and bag. “What are you muttering to yourself again?”
“What do you mean again?” You asked stunned, blood rushing to your neck and cheeks. “You caught me doing that a lot?”
“You are not really trying to hide it.” Amelia shrugged. “So, what was it?”
“Nothing. It was nothing.” You pouted while you put on your coat.
“Was it about Pretty Boy?” She smirked at you.
“Oh, stop!” You said as sternly as possible with your lips jutted out in a pout. “It wasn’t about Pretty Boy.”
“Hmm,” She nodded smugly. “I’ll pretend I believe that.” She laced her arm with yours as you both exited the bar.
“He is really pretty.” You smiled shyly. Amelia’s shoulder nudged yours, as she giggled along with you.
“Next time, we see him. You’re talking to him.” You groaned at her words.
That night was the first time, you ever laid eyes on him. And you thought it would be the last time.
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What were the chances for you to stumble upon him in this city ever again? He could be living outside of the city. Or it was only chance that brought him there tonight. And this was a once in a lifetime chance to meet the love of your life. And you blew it.
“Shut up!” You groaned as you slapped your forehead. “I did not blow my chance because there wasn’t one to begin with.”
“Voices in your head?” Amelia put down the lighter next to you.
“They’re really loud today.” You shook your head. “And you don’t have to bring it back all the time. You can keep it.”
“I won’t have an excuse to come and see you. anymore”
“You don’t really need one.” You sighed.
“True.” She smirked. “Wanna go to Josie’s tonight?”
“What are we celebrating?” You retorted.
“Nothing.” Amelia shrugged. “I thought maybe we could blow off some steam.” She shrugged and sat down on your desk. “Seeing as those last two months were kinda crazy.”
“Yeah, they were.” You agreed. “I mean we are nearing the end of the season.”
As it were in the publishing world, books are published in a three-season cycle: Winter, Summer and Fall. Winter season came to a close by the end of April and the datelines were getting closer. For the last two months, you and your team had been working nonstop. You and the author of the book you were proofreading, were going back and forth about editing issues he had. And his anxieties regarding the matter were also affecting you. Under pressure and anxious, you and your coworkers had no time to go back out.
“I could use the break.” You leaned back in your chair. “And a couple of beers.”
“It’s a date.” Amelia got back on her feet. “Meet you by the reception desk.”
“Yeah, see you.”
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Amelia and you were on the sidewalk in front of Josie’s. She was smoking a cigarette before you both get in.
“Doesn’t it bother you?” Amelia asked you.
“I like the smell of it.” You shrugged.
She took another puff before she elbowed your side. You glared at her.  Her pointy elbow dug into your side painfully. “What’s that for?”
“It seems you’re in luck tonight.” She looked down at you. And with a jerk of her head, she indicated at something behind you.
You turned around and there he was. Tapping his cane on the sidewalk, holding the arm of a beautiful blonde. There was a man, blonde also, walking on his other side. Pretty Boy’s tie was loose around his neck and slightly crooked. A giant smile was on his face as the beautiful lady on his side threw her head back in laughter. You kept your eyes on their little group as they disappeared into the bar.
“Alright, tonight’s the night.” Amelia took a last puff out of her cigarette.
“What?” You turned to her confused.
“We agreed that next time we see him here, you would talk to him.”
“I did not agree to anything. You agreed with yourself.” You told her as she started to drag you toward the bar. “Amelia, stop!” You pulled your arm away from her.
“What are you so afraid of?” Amelia huffed in annoyance.
“Rejection. Humiliation. Mortification. Embarrassment.” You started to list out.
Sure, he was handsome. He was painfully handsome. And although, you had thought of his lips on yours, of his hands running through your hair as he whispered sweet nothings in your ear. Your hands flew to your ears at the thought. They warmed up as your blood rushed to them. You couldn’t do it. You couldn’t talk to him.
“I’m perfectly fine with watching him from afar.” You said quietly, dropping your hands. “Can we go somewhere else, please?” You crossed your arms over your chest, making yourself as small as possible.
She dropped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you into her side. “We already here, so we might as well go in.” You started pulling away from her. “I won’t make you do anything you don’t want to. Relax.” She pulled you back in and turned you towards the doors.
“Promise?” You put your pinky out.
“Promise.” She hooked her pinky with yours.
In most situations, you weren’t afraid to go after what you wanted. Of course, you had to pass it through a few people first. Just to make sure you were making the right decision. Especially, when it came to your job. But when it came to relationships—romantic ones, you never took the first step. You were always afraid that the people you wanted—you desired—wouldn’t want you back. Which explains your lack of experiences when it came to dating. And the disappointing sexual experiences you had.
You sat at the bar and ordered your beer. Amelia sat beside you but kept looking over her shoulder. You turned briefly to where she was looking. And surely enough, she was looking directly towards Pretty Boy and his friends. You sighed and turned back around.
“You promised, remember?” You told her. “Pinky promised. Those are sacred.”
“Yeah, I know.” She pouted and turned back around. “You’re going to regret it later.”
“Don’t I know it?” You exhaled deeply.
How many times have you let someone go before you were too afraid to speak? How much longer will you stay up at night wondering about what ifs? How much longer will you stand in the way of your own happiness? How much longer will you live in fear?
There was comfort in fear. It kept you on your toes. It told you where the edge was. It helped you survive. There was nothing wrong with fear. There were no broken hearts, no hurt feelings. It was safe.
And yet—you wished you could take that step. You knew you could. You’ve done it before. You left the comfort of your home. Of everything you’ve known to come here in Hell’s Kitchen. What was the worse that could happen in talking to him? Nothing, right? It was just talking. A simple conversation between two people. Or maybe, you would just give him your number. He could call you if he wanted to. If not—well, you would keep wondering why he didn’t call you. The thought of it was torture enough.
You glanced back over your shoulder at Pretty Boy. He was no longer sitting with his friends. His coat was still there on the back of his chair, but he was gone. You turned back to your drink, and sorrowfully starting to play with the condensation on your beer.
“What can I get you, Murdock?”
“Just another beer, Josie, thanks.”
You turned your eyes towards the voice. And there he was. So, much more handsome up close. His voice was nice and deep. Music to your ears. You turned your eyes away from him. Your heartbeat was now racing in your ribcage. You looked up at the ceiling, searching for some sort of answers.
“Hey, I’m gonna go out for a smoke.” Amelia announced slamming her bottle on the counter.
“I’ll come with you.” You squeaked out.
“You should definitely stay and enjoy yourself.” Amelia pulled her hair out of the collar of her coat. “I’ll be back in a moment. You should—you know strike up a conversation or two.” And she pointedly looked at the man by your side.
You gasped as she left. “You promised!” You called after her. “Pinky promised.”
“What did she promise?” Pretty Boy asked you. A grin plastered on his face.
You took a few minutes to answer, your eyes following Amelia’s exit out of the bar. And let out a breath. “To not make me do something I didn’t want to do.”
“And what was it? The thing you didn’t want to do.”
You couldn’t help the small grin that came onto your face before you answered. “Striking up a conversation with someone.”
“Ah.” He nodded. “Why not?”
“It’s kind of terrifying for me to—talk to people.” The blood was rushing to your chest, your heart was slamming against your ribcage.
“You’re talking to me now.” His voice seemed lower as he spoke.
You scoffed. “True. I am.”
“How does it feel?” His lips twitched up at the corners.
“Not as terrifying as I thought.”
He chuckled. And you smiled at the sound. “I’m Matt.” He extended his hand out to you.
You put your hand in his. Your breath hitched in your throat as your skin touched his. You cleared your throat before giving him your name.
“You have a pretty name.” He told you.
“You make it sound prettier.” You quipped back, feeling braver now. His eyebrows flew high on his forehead before he let out a laugh. You laughed along with him. “Nice to meet you, Matt.”
“Pleasure’s all mine.” He nodded, this boyish grin never leaving his face.
That was the night you officially met Matt Murdock. It wasn’t as daunting as you thought it would be. In fact, speaking with Matt came easy to you. His eyes were unseeing and yet, they were always on you. And for once in your life, you did not mind the attention.
You didn’t think anything life altering would come of it. If anything, you thought you were gaining another friend.
Little did you know…
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deathbyyoongx · 9 months
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everytime; chapter 5 — myg
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╭ chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, ...
╭ word count: 6.6k
╭ summary: Everyone knew Min Yoongi as the guy who wouldn't say no to a nice pair of tits. His cocky attitude and stunning looks made it hard for most girls to resist. And even though you would like to say you're not like the others in that aspect, you unfortunately happened to be his ex. But even though you despised his guts for the last 3 years or so, he somehow managed to find himself a way between your legs on one semi-drunk night.
╭ pairing: fuckboy!yoongi x ex!reader
╭ genre: smut, angst, bit of fluff, more smut
╭ warnings: enemies to fwb, dom!yoongi, sub!reader, jealous ex!jungkook, bestfriend!jimin, hate sex, yoongi has a degrading kink but so does yn, brat taming, hair pulling, spitting, slapping, hickeys, choking, unprotected sex (STAY SAFE GUYS!), creampie, praise kink, hand kink, possessive yoongi, sexual content ofc, mentions of drinking, ...
╭ author's note: this fic is inspired by the song everytime by ariana grande. I also recommend using the chrome extension InteractiveFics for a better reading experience ;)
I know it's been a while since I updated this fic, but when I tell you a lot happened with me this year, I really mean it lol. But hey, I'm back :) <3 I haven't reread this chapter, so there may be typos.
03/08/2023
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“Taehyung has been snoring the whole night, I can’t.” Jimin complained as he took another bite of his sandwich.
“I’m sorry I have a stuffy nose.” Taehyung pouted, his mouth still full of food.
Jungkook, Taehyung, and Jimin have been roommates ever since college. At first, they shared a place to cut the budget of their rent, but now they are just too lazy to search for something else. Even though, I think they enjoy living together and just use it as an excuse now.
Jimin took a sip of his drink. “Jungkook slept through the night though.”
Taehyung waited for you to add something to the conversation, but he noticed your absent mind ever since you guys lunched together. “You don’t seem excited to see us.” He frowned.
You snapped out of your thoughts, quickly shaking your head in disagreement. “I am just-“ You couldn’t find words to add.
“I see you recovered quickly from being sick.” Jimin said, lips curled into a smirk, making it very clear to you that he knew it was just bullshit.
Taehyung took a bite of his sandwich. “Yeah, I heard you were very sweaty.” He said innocently, not knowing the underlining truth behind Jimin’s comment.
“I…was indeed, yes.”
Jimin thought for a second, wondering if he should say what he was about to say. “I don’t want to be that guy, but you should really talk with Jungkook. The guy has been very on edge lately.”
Of course, Jungkook again. “It’s not my fault he’s like that.” Even though it felt like it was though. And the more you started to think about it, it really felt like your fault.
“Yeah, I know. But the least you could do is text him a ‘leave me alone’ instead of not responding at all.” Jimin explained. Ever since Hoseok’s party, You started to respond very drily or not even at all to Jungkook’s texts. You really had no good excuse as to why you’ve been so absent lately, especially since Jungkook knew your work schedule. ‘You’ve never been so busy, do you have a new hobby?’ Areone of the things he would ask you. Sometimes you just wanted to text him a quick and short ‘shut up’, but that would just add more fuel to the fire.
He had a point.
“I will.” Even though you said you would, you were still not sure if you’d actually do it. Jungkook had the habit to keep asking questions and you were not a great liar. And the more he’d ask, the more suspicious he’d get about what truly happened that night.
Taehyung noticed that there was a lot on your mind. “If you want to, you can come over to our place tonight. We’re going to watch that weird movie that Jin has been suggesting for the last few weeks.” He suggested, hoping it would get your mind off of things for a moment.
However, his question made the nerves kick in. “I-uhm can’t.” Clearing your throat as you said that, before taking a quick sip of your water.
Jimin narrowed his eyes, feeling a bit suspicious. “How come?”
Help me find the right excuse, someone. “I have uhm-plans.”
“Why are you stuttering so much?” Taehyung asked innocently as usual.
“With whom?” Jimin asked, but his gut feeling already knew with whom.
You just started to play with the leftover food on your plate, twirling it around with your finger like a toddler, not looking at either one of the boys. “Just…someone.” The silence after you denied to give any more information became a bit too unbearable for you. You sighed and looked up to look at them. “You’re not letting me leave until I tell you, huh?”
“Of course not.” They said in unison.
You hesitated for a sec. “Just don’t go around telling everyone, alright?”
“Come one y/n, we’re not teenagers anymore.” Jimin said to convince you.
“Okay…”It’s no big deal, right y/n? You’re just going out with your ex, nothing wrong with that. “I’m going out with Yoongi tonight.” The painful silence after that statement was killing you.
Shit.
“Wait…” Jimin said as his mind started to connect the dots. “So the guy you hooked up with the night of Hoseok’s party was Yoongi?!”
Taehyung almost choked on his drink. “They hooked up?!” He then thought for a second. “I’m surprised, but also, I’m not.”
“Are you guys going to get back together?” Jimin asked, almost sounding concerned. You low-key started to regret your confession.
What was your answer to this question? “No, I don’t think so-“ The question seemed to linger around your head. Were you? Was that what you wanted? Would Yoongi even want to get back together? I mean, the man can’t seem to keep it in his pants. Think about all those girls who probably have an unrequited crush on him, they would all pray for your downfall. And most importantly, Jia, how could you go back to work if she’d found out?
Confusion spread over Jimin’s face. “What do you mean you don’t think so?”
You were starting to get fed up with these questions which where you did not know the answers to yourself. “Look, Yoongi doesn’t seem to be interested in a relationship right now,” You say slightly annoyed. “Or so I’ve heard.” You noticed Taehyung and Jimin looking at you with a doubtful look. “And I can live with that.” You reassured.
“Can you though?” Taehyung asked a bit skeptical.
“Look if I get my heart broken it won’t be anyone’s fault but mine.” They noticed you started to get more and more defensive by the second.
“You’re out of your mind.” Jimin added.
A worried gaze started to appear on Taehyung’s face. “Does Jungkook know?”
“Of course he doesn’t.” You said defeated. “I’m not obligated to tell him.”
Taehyung and Jimin exchanged a worrisome glance at one another before turning back to you. “Look I get where you coming from, but he won’t take it that way.” Jimin explained.
“I know.” Ever since that night, a feeling of dread started to eat you up from the inside. You felt guilty, even though you shouldn’t. You told Jungkook multiple times you were just friends, but people continue to be protective about his feelings. But what about your feelings? “I’ll just…tell him myself. He needs to hear it from me you know.” You said defeated. Taehyung nodded in agreement, but Jimin just gave you an awkward smile, knowing this won’t end well.
What have I done to myself?
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Work stalled and the only thing you could focus on was the ticking sound of that dreadful clock. Yoongi was planning to pick you up from work after your shift, but the idea of Jia still walking around on the work floor made you nervous as hell. How were you going to explain to her that her casual fuckbuddy used to be your boyfriend and that ever since a few days ago, you started seeing him again? The more and more you started to think about this situation, the more fucked it seemed to be. The clock hit 5 ‘o clock, which meant it was your time to head home. You quickly checked if you missed anything on your to-do list before checking out. You quickly freshened up, and if anyone was watching you right now it looked like you were running late for something. But in reality, you just didn’t want anyone to see you looking like this. Because you hated to admit it, but you did pick your best outfit for tonight. You quickly fixed your makeup and walked out of the changing room.
To your surprise, Yoongi had been waiting inside the café for you. He was wearing a nice dark blue dress shirt and black trousers. Yoongi told you to wear something nice, but not overly formal, so you just chose a nice top in combination with a skirt. And when he noticed the effort you had put in for him, a sly smile appeared on his face. “You look good.”
Your cheeks were getting a bit flushed by his compliment. “Thanks.” You looked around a bit stressed as you walked up to Yoongi, making him frown his eyebrows, wondering why you were behaving so anxious. “Let’s go though.”
“You seem to be in a hurry, but not for the right reasons.” Yoongi said as if he could read your mind. “Worried Jia will see us, huh?”
You forced a smile as you linked your arm to Yoongi’s. “Let’s just go.” You repeated. Yoongi just scoffed but did as he was told since he didn’t want to piss you off already.
Your mission of nobody of work seeing you leave with Yoongi was successful, making you feel more at ease. Yoongi let you to his car and to your surprise it was a very nice one, coming from someone that doesn’t give two shits about cars. He opened the door for you, giving you a small smile as you hopped in. He closed the door and you didn’t know why, but your anxiety was getting the best of you. Who were you kidding, of course you knew. You were going on a date with your hot ex that everyone seemed to either want or hate.
You stepped into his car, but before starting the engine he turned to you, a small chuckle leaving his lips. “Relax, it’s just me.” He placed his hand on your thigh, slightly caressing it to ease the tension.
You expect your uneasiness to be that obvious. “I know, that’s the problem.” Why did I say that?
You thought Yoongi was going to snap back at you, but instead, he just smiled. “If it makes you feel any better, you’ve done this before.” He said in a joking manner in combination with a wink, making you smile as well as memories of your past relationship flooded through your mind.
Yoongi started the engine and began driving, and what I sight to see it was. Seeing him drive shouldn’t be that attractive, but here we are. The older he got, the more handsome he got. You still remembered that shy quiet guy from high school, one that was not capable of being such a player. But look at him now, he had grown into a man, and what kind of man…One that women can’t seem to get enough from.
“Jimin and Taehyung were quite surprised when I told them we were going out tonight.” You said to break the silence.
Yoongi tilted his head in a slight surprise, his eyes still focused on the road. “You told them about us?” He almost didn’t believe it.
You rolled my eyes and chuckled. “It was hard not to. Especially after Jimin found out about the hickeys you had left on me.”
He proudly smiled at the thought of that. “My hard work shouldn’t go unnoticed.” He joked, making you smile at his stupid comment. “You seem to have covered them well though.” He added, noticing the lack of love bites on your neck, even though he knew they were still lingering.
You couldn’t help but pout as he said that. “Yeah, because of you I have to wake up earlier to cover them up with concealer.” You whined, making his heart melt by the way you said that.
“Cute.” He whispered under his breath. “I guess I’ll apologize for the inconvenience.” He said oddly formally, making you well aware he didn’t really mean it.
This was nice, you thought to yourself, but then your mind decided to ruin it for you again. Don’t feel special, he’s probably like this with all those other girls. Overthinking had become your specialty over the couple of years, especially when it was around the topic of ‘Min Yoongi.’ And now it had become a threat to fully enjoying your night. As you were staring out of the window, you started to notice the streets were getting oddly familiar. You narrowed your eyes as you carefully examined the buildings and street signs, trying your best to recognize why it all felt so familiar. But that’s when it hit you…
“Wait, are we…” You softly spoke, almost inaudible to Yoongi, but just loud enough for him to hear. However, he didn’t say anything and just started smiling at himself until you arrived. And that’s when your speculation got confirmed. A small restaurant hidden in the city, the outside covered with plants and fairy lights. “Oh my god, Yoongi.” It was the place where you had your first date.
Yoongi parked the car before he asked. “Don’t like it?” He was a bit unsure if this was the right move.
“No, I…do.” You were in awe as you looked a the place with wide eyes. “It is the same as how I remember it.” You smiled, turning to him, seeing his eyes were already on you. Shit. You were feeling those damn butterflies again.
“I’m glad you like it.”
As Yoongi and you stepped out of the car, you couldn’t help but get a little bit emotional about this place. Not only did you have your first date here, but many dates after that. You came so often that the boss started to recognize you every time you came, even stopping by sometimes to join in your conversations. A soft smile painted your face the more you thought of it, the feeling of nostalgia hugging you.
“Wait-“ Yoongi spoke before you walked in, gently pulling you in for a kiss. “Now we can go.”
This man…
The waitress outside greeted you with a bright smile as Yoongi asked if there was still a spot free for you two. She let you to a free table outside and you two happily sat down. “I don’t know why, but being here again is kind of weird.” You opened the menu, seeing nothing had changed from the last time you two ate here.
“I know right.” He chuckled, happy he had chosen this date idea. “Just pick whatever, I’ll pay.”
“It’s fine, Yoongi. I don’t care about these gender roles-”
“I don’t either, but I want to pay.”
You looked up from the menu for a second, noticing two piercing eyes looking at you. Your eyes widen, frozen in your current pose as your eyes met hers. Oh no…The woman quickly walked over to your table. Oh no…
“I thought I recognized you two! I haven’t seen you in ages, I thought you had moved to another city or something.” The old lady spoke with joy, almost sounding emotional at the sight of you. “It warms my heart you two are still together. How have you been?”
You moved your eyes over to Yoongi, not sure how to respond to this. However, he just smiled at her, ignoring the fact you were unsure what to do. “Yeah, we both were just so busy the last couple of years, plus we also wanted to save up some money to move out so that’s why. But luckily we finally found a free slot in our busy schedules to enjoy some time together again at our favorite place.”
You’ve never heard so much bullshit coming from someone’s mouth at once. However, Miss Kang was completely eating this up. “I’m happy to see you again. Can’t believe it’s been so long, you’ve really grown into adults, it’s making me slightly emotional even.” Were those tears in her eyes? “I’ll let you two be for now, enjoy the food!”
With a tilted head, you looked back to Yoongi, giving him a ‘what-was-that’ kind of look. He just shrugged his shoulders. “If you want to tell her the truth, go ahead. But then you’ll break a poor lady’s heart.” He said to toy with you, holding onto his chest as if his heart hurt.
“I don’t think I have the heart to do so.” I said, putting on my best act to sound emotional, making Yoongi chuckle.
Shockingly enough, there wasn’t a moment where you two fought or anything close to that. This was actually…really nice. But your mind knew its way to ruin it for you again. He better have not brought any other girls to this place…But then again, if he did, the owner wouldn’t have been so surprised to see us. Stop thinking! Just enjoy this for a second. You barely went out lately. It had just been work, work, and more work. Taking on more shifts you could actually handle. Jimin liked to tease you for it, saying you barely had any time for him and the boys. He then would follow up with a fake cry and dabbing away his fake tears.
The night flew by, and how darker the night got, the brighter the fairy lights shone. It seemed like a scene out of a movie, how romantic. After dinner, Yoongi invited you to his apartment, and not to do any funny business perse, he quickly added after suggesting that. So after him paying for your food, a car ride, and some more flirting, you two were standing in front of his apartment complex. You looked up at it in awe, seeing it must have cost a nice amount of money…
“You live…here?” You ask, almost in denial that this was where Yoongi lived.
He was searching for his keys as the two of you head inside. “What? I’ve been working hard.” He said nonchalantly as he noticed your wide eyes. And that’s when you realized…Yoongi didn’t live in an apartment, this was a penthouse. “Don’t forget, when you were still in college, I was starting to create a name for myself, so this just didn’t happen in one two three. And it’s not the biggest around, so no need to be so in shock.”
“But still!” You didn’t care if it wasn’t the biggest or the most luxurious, it was still something you could never afford with your café money. The two of you took the elevator to the seventh floor and you couldn’t hide your amazement at Yoongi’s living space. “No wonder girls like to spend the night with you.” You said without putting much thought behind it.
He just scoffed. “Are you saying my wonderful personality isn’t enough for them?”
You rolled your eyes and smirked. “I bet it is.”
Yoongi opened his front door, letting you into his penthouse. “Ladies first.” You stepped your first foot in and already were impressed by how nice it looked inside. It was decorated with a lot of dark and wood undertones, but you didn’t expect anything else from him. You awkwardly stood in his living room, waiting for him to say “Please, take a seat. Make yourself at home.” You carefully sat down on his sofa, watching Yoongi walk over to his liquor cabinet, and pour a drink both for him and you. He walked back to you with two glasses in his hand. “Drink up, It’ll help you loosen up.” He said as he handed over the alcoholic drink. “So tell me, how has y/n’s life been doing ever since she and Min Yoongi broke up.” Yoongi placed down the liquor bottle and placed himself next to you, nonchalantly putting his arms around your shoulders.
You couldn’t help but chuckle at his weird way of asking that. “Well-” You spoke “After graduating, I just continued working at the café. And to be honest, I really enjoy it there. I’ve even been considering opening one myself, but first I need to do some more research and save up some more money to do that.”
“So you tell me, all those nights you were busy studying instead of going out, were all for a bachelor you ended up not using?” He teased. “So all those nights you could’ve been spending the night with me-”
“Augh, shut up!” You interrupted.
Yoongi laughed before taking another sip from his drink. “I’m joking, getting a bachelor’s degree in the first place is really impressive. And I’m just happy you found something that you like doing.”
“Thank you.” You smile, circling your finger on the rim of the glass. “I see your music producing has gotten you far.”
Yoongi always stayed humble. “I just got lucky, it took me a while to get here.”
“I’m not surprised though, you always had talent. I think it was just a matter of time for you to be successful.” When you said that, you spoke from the heart. On Yoongi’s free days, he would spend the night at your dorm, making you listen to whatever draft he had worked on that day. You always loved it, no matter if it was a biased opinion or not. You just felt confident he was meant to be successful.
“Is that why you’re back?” He teased. “I always knew you were a gold digger.”
“Augh-“ You playfully sighed. “You know that’s not true.” You took another sip from your drink, noticing yourself getting more lightheaded. “Does that occur often? Girls just wanting you for your money?”
“No, this all just happened recently. They are always impressed though.” Another sip. “Besides, I don’t have enough to be someone’s sugar daddy, if that’s what you’re thinking about.”
“You’ve made yourself quite the subject around the girls I know.”
“Did I?” You smirked, not because he felt proud about being the number one topic in Jia’s friend group, but more out of sheer curiosity. “Tell me more.”
“Well, especially Jia. One time she was even telling me about how great the size of your dick was.” A sign of you getting more and more intoxicated by the minute, was the fact you started to say everything unfiltered. “It drove me nuts, especially because I could imagine every single detail she described.” You said with a look of disgust. “Oh, maybe I shouldn’t have said that.” You say, turning to Yoongi with wide eyes and your hand covering your mouth.
However, he found this rather amusing. “No, no, it’s fine. Please, continue.” He chuckled. “Didn’t expect I was such a hot topic.”
“She also told me some of her friends had done the deed with you. Can’t believe you.” You said with rolling eyes before emptying your glass. “They talk about you in a way that I could never imagine.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“They act as if you’re this sex god or something.” You say with a confused expression on your face. “I’ve heard them talk about you once and I never knew people could say such filthy things in one sitting. You really got them wrapped around your finger, I got to give you that.”
Yoongi just laughed, a bit embarrassed to be honest. He noticed your face getting redder by the minute, and not because you were embarrassed, but because of the alcohol. “Your mind probably thinks, fuck, not that bastard again.” He said jokingly, even though he knew there was some truth behind it.
You couldn’t help but laugh at his reaction. “Initially, it does.” Your smile faded into a softer one as you reminisce about the former version of Yoongi. “But then I think about how you were in high school. That sweet boy in the back of the class who was even too shy to ask me out.” The smile Yoongi noticed appearing on your face made him feel appreciated, since now he knew how you really thought about him whenever his name got mentioned. “I only started to think you were a bastard after we broke up the first time.”
Yoongi just scoffed as he took another sip of his drink. “That’s when it all went south.” He laughed. “I guess I’ll have to show you the best of me from now on.” He teased as he eyed down your glass, noticing the lack of liquor left in it. “Should I pour more for you?”
You happily nodded as you handed him your glass. “Yes please!” He just smiled as he went back to his cabinet to fill your glass for round two. You just studied Yoongi’s anatomy as he was pouring the drink. How his shirt accentuated his back muscles, how broad his shoulders became as he got older, or how beautiful his long black hair was. What a sight to be seen. Yoongi turned back around, handing back your drink as he sat down next to you, in the same position as before. He took another sip from his drink, something obviously gnawing on his conscious.
That’s when he decided to ask it. “How are things between you and Jungkook?”
You couldn’t help but feel a bit uneasy whenever Jungkook’s name got mentioned in conversations. Especially since you got together with Jungkook after the break up with Yoongi…“Good, we’re best friends now.” But you noticed the weird look Yoongi gave you after you gave your answer. “What?”
“Nothing.” He quickly said to shrug off any suspicion. “Why did you guys break up though?”
“Eh, it’s my turn to ask a question now” You didn’t want to keep talking about Jungkook anymore, especially when it came to Yoongi. Why would you want to be honest about your emotions?
Yoongi was a bit taken aback by your reaction. “Didn’t know we were taking turns. But all right, go ahead.”
You felt your heartbeat increase by the question that was lingering in your head. “How many other girls are you seeing beside me.”
Yoongi moved a bit closer to you. “Wouldn’t you like to know, huh?” He said he locked his eyes onto yours, noticing the seriousness on your face. “Well, that’s private.”
Your eyebrows frowned as he said that. “Private?!” You said baffled.
“Hmh? What? Aren’t you the one being secretive about us too?” He asked in the most unserious tone.
“fine”
He chuckled before emptying his glass as well. “Now, back to my former question. Why did you two break up?”
“Uhm.” The thing was, no matter how much alcohol you drank, there was no way in hell that you could tell him the real reason you broke up with Jungkook. Oh, I quickly discovered that he was just a rebound and that I was actually still in love with you. But when I wanted to get back together, you were already busy fucking half the girls of the town. So I just came to the conclusion we weren’t meant to be to start with. Yeah right. t“We just didn’t match.”
“That’s all?”
“Yup.”
Yoongi would’ve believed you if you said that statement in full confidence. But the mixture of you waiting too long to respond and saying your sentence with hesitation made it very clear to him that there was something you weren’t telling him. But he also knew he wasn’t going to get it out of you tonight. “Alright then.”
After your second glass, you realized you really shouldn’t have had another one. Because unsurprisingly enough, you couldn’t really handle alcohol that well. “Can you kiss me now though? I’ve been dying for you to give me another one but without much success.” You tried to say in your most seductive tone, but due to your drunkenness, it came out a bit funny.
“So needy all of a sudden, huh?”
“Hmh, kissy kiss please.” You pouted your lips like a fish as you leaned into Yoongi to plant one on him.
Yoongi frowned his brows as he suddenly backed away from you, a sinister smirk formed on his lips. “Wait, are you drunk already?” He said bewildered, not believing anyone could easily get that drunk.
You scoffed. “You’re a silly man with silly questions. I don’t think I am. Which means we can take this further, right tiger?” Stroking your index finger from his chest to just above his groin.
He shook his head in disbelief. “Alright, You’re drunk y/n”
“Maybe a little.”
“Well, I’m not, so there won’t be any funny business tonight.” You suddenly felt the touch of his hands around your wrist, holding your hand back from touching him any further.
“Heh!” You couldn’t believe it. “But you know I like to fuck when I’m drunk.”
Yoongi couldn’t help but smile out of embarrassment, not expecting you to have said that. Min Yoongi being a bit shy? “I know, but it’s weird when I’m sober.”
“But I’ve been dying to kiss you, touch you, fuck you.” You leaned in even closer to Yoongi, the distance between your faces being minimal, hoping this would reel him in.
But to your disappointment, it didn’t work. “I’m flattered, really, but don’t worry I won’t be going anywhere soon.”
You pouted, your heart aching from the idea that he didn’t want to touch you. How dare he. “Can we just hug then?”
“Hugging is fine.”
You quickly wrapped your arms around Yoongi, pressing your cheek against his chest, appreciating the softness of his shirt. You were listening to his heartbeat as if it were a lullaby. With every thump the relaxer you got. “I haven’t spoken to you for three years and it feels like yesterday we were together.” You mumbled.
“Weird huh?” He said softly.
Something in you wanted to tell him you missed him, but your little heart couldn’t get itself to do it. It would’ve made you too vulnerable and you didn’t want to ruin this moment to speak up about your complicated feelings for Yoongi. It could mean absolutely nothing to him, but you were just happy to be able to lay in his arms tonight. Cause after tonight, you knew he was just going to the next girl on his list. But the sudden feeling of his thumb caressing your arm as he held you made your eyes water. He wasn’t talking, just watching admiring you. The silence felt far from awkward. It was more comforting than something else.
You felt your eyelids getting heavy though. “Would you have a problem with me if I fell asleep right now?”
Yoongi chuckled, not surprised you were already going to crash. “Of course not”
“We’ll the chance of that happening is very high.” You mumbled. “Why do you smell so good.” You said it as if it was a bad thing. Which for you kind of was, because it made you crave for more of him. You looked up to him and when his eyes met yours, a smile appeared on your face out of reflex. “You’re so beautiful.”
The moment you said that, you saw Yoongi’s features soften up. His eyebrows turned into a pleading kind of expression, his eyes twinkling and his mouth slightly open. “Oh y/n…” He said as if his heart was hurting.
“What?”
He let out a defeated sigh as he tucked a strand of your hand behind your ear. “Nothing. I’m just happy to see you again.” You saw his pupils move from one place to another as he was examining your face like a work of art. “Maybe we should head to bed.”
“Ooh, we?” You teased, still trying to get him to do all those things he said he would over the phone.
“Come on.” He moved up from his seat, reaching his hand for you to take it, which you did in seconds, of course. He led you to his bedroom, seeing how luxurious it looked, making you even madder he didn’t want to do anything with you tonight. “I’ll give you my shirt to sleep in.” He walked over to his closet, grabbed a black shirt, and handed it to you.
You accepted it in full grace, happy to be wearing his clothes again. He used to do this as well when you came to his place three years ago. It almost felt like a privilege. “Turn around though.”
“Are you serious?” Yoongi said appalled, almost sounding offended. Not because he really wanted to see you naked or something, but rather because he had seen you naked multiple times, Hoseok’s party excluded. But he just guessed because it had been a long time, you had lost that comfort in him.
“Yes, this is very exclusive content!” You pouted. Yes, you knew Yoongi had already seen every little crevice of your body, but because of his abundance of experience, you became a bit insecure.  
“I’ll go ahead and brush my teeth already then.” He said, respecting your needs.
“Oh, I don’t have a toothbrush.”
“One night won’t ruin your dental hygiene.”
As Yoongi headed inside his bathroom, you quickly changed into his shirt. You were blushing to yourself, feeling rather proud to be able to wear his shirts. I hope no other girl has worn this. A moment later you were lying down on his bed, quickly realizing the sheets smelled like Yoongi. You really were on Cloud 9. After a few minutes, he came back wearing only a pair of briefs. Even though you’ve seen his chest multiple times, you still were too timid to look, making you turn your head to the side. “What’s the matter? First time seeing a bare-chested man?” He said sarcastically
“I’m feeling violated.”
He placed himself next to you, hovering over you. “Next time you’ll be drinking the weak stuff first and I’ll just drink the hard stuff myself, lightweight.” He gently grabbed your face and planted a kiss on your forehead. “Then we can get drunk at the same pace, how about that?”
You smiled, pulling him in for a kiss on the lips. “Sounds like a great idea.” This felt weird. This whole night felt weird. Not because of you or Yoongi in particular. But because it all felt like weird déjà vu. “Alright, goodnight y/n.” He said before turning off the light
“Goodnight Yoongi.” You rubbed your face against the pillow, creating a little malt to fit your face nicely to sleep in. The sudden feeling of his arm snaking around your waist almost made you cry. He pulled you a bit closer, feeling his heartbeat against your back. You smiled. Cause tonight, you were his and his only.
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“Don’t kiss me I have morning breath.” When you found yourself in Yoongi’s arms, and a painful headache, the next morning, you realized how bad of a combo you and alcohol are.
Yoongi chuckled before leaning in closer to you. “Like I care Besides, yesterday you were very persistent on me kissing you.” He teased with a smirk.
“I talk a bit too much when I’m tipsy.” You pouted as you felt Yoongi’s lips on your neck.
“Tipsy?” He teased.
“Shut up.” You sat up straight, stretching your body to wake yourself up. “I can’t stay long though, I have to be at work at 12.” Your heart was feeling sad you had to leave already.
Yoongi sat straight as well. “It’s fine, I have a meeting in the afternoon, so I couldn’t stay either,” He gently grabbed your chin, pulling you in for a kiss. “unfortunately.” Yoongi moved up from his bed, stretching at well. “Let me take a quick shower before I drop you off.”
However, you did not hear that last sentence Yoongi just said. Because Yoongi was indeed, a healthy man. And healthy men would occasionally get morning wood. It was not your fault it distracted you for a minute. You quickly moved your eyes away from his clothed erection and decided to keep your focus strictly on Yoongi’s face. “Sorry, what?”
Yoongi smirked at the sight of you being flustered. “I said I was going to take a quick shower, but it seems that you were a bit distracted.”
“Just go shower, please!”
Yoongi just shook his head in disbelief. “You’re a lot of talk when you’re drunk, but sober you’re such a pussy.” He said before closing the door behind him. During Yoongi’s shower, you put back on your own clothes as you heard the shower head running. You caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, noticing the rubbed-out mascara that made you look like a raccoon. You tried your best to tame your hair but without much luck. You heard a notification noise coming from somewhere, but it wasn’t from your phone. Curiosity got the best of you, so you quickly took a glimpse at the text Yoongi received.
[09:21] Eunha: Yoongi~ I hope tonight is still on. I haven’t heard from you yet so I’m getting worried ㅠㅠ
The urge to text her back yourself to tell you that he was busy with someone else, was immense. But you just bit your tongue and ignored it. It was the universe telling you that you were, indeed, not special. Being Yoongi’s one and only was too good to be true. You just sighed, laying back down and trying your best to get your mind out of the gutter. After a few minutes of waiting, Yoongi was done with his shower and decided to come out of the bathroom with just a towel around his waist. You really are testing me, aren’t you? You took a little peak, before covering your eyes with your arms, making Yoongi chuckle. “You can look you know? I don’t mind.”
“I feel more comfortable likes this.”
His lips left a little ‘tsk’ sound as he started to get dressed, telling you after a few minutes it was safe to open your eyes again. You sat up from the bed, smiling innocently at Yoongi as if you didn’t want him to rearrange your guts yesterday, but now you were chickening out. “y/n-” You hear Yoongi whisper, making you turn your body to him. You felt his hands creep onto your waist as he leaned in a bit. “Before we go, can I just…” He pulled your body closer to his, making you hold onto his shoulders as he gently pressed you against the door. You could feel his breath against your lips, waiting for a second before pressing his lips against yours, his lips slowly moving against yours. A rush of excitement went through your body by Yoongi’s sudden need for you. You could feel his hand squeezing your breast as if he had been waiting for the opportunity to do so, making you let out a small wince. His lips left yours and a grin painted his face. “Alright, let’s go.” You weren’t sure what just happened, or why he suddenly had the need to do that. You’d be lying if it didn’t leave you wanting more, but neither of you had the time for it anymore. Making you think he did this on purpose.
After the two of you left his apartment, he drove you back home, which didn’t take that long. Conveniently enough, his house was that far from yours. After holding the door for you again and walking up to your front door, you couldn’t believe this was already over. “Thanks for last night, I really had fun.” You said before opening the door.
“So did I.” He smiled before it turned into a slight grin. “Now that you stopped pretending you don’t want to see me, how about I come over to pick you up this Friday?”
Suddenly, the text from that girl named Eunha popped into your head, altering your answer. “I’ll think about it.” You said with a hint of sadness.
Yoongi leaned in closer, holding your waist for a second before planting another kiss on your lips. “Let me know, okay? See you soon y/n.” He smiled before letting go of you. You watch him drive off before heading into your home, leaning against the door as soon as it’s closed. But when you caught yourself being a little bit too smiley, you mentally slapped yourself out of it. Don’t do this to yourself No, you weren’t going to fall in love with him again. No matter how nice he would be to you. He was an upper-fuckboy and you should know better. You were just another one in his long contact list of girls. So tonight you made a promise to yourself. The moment you started to catch feelings for Yoongi, you would cut him out of your life.
Simple.
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Taglist; @flowerblu00, @brinda-9, @seokjinkismet, @sugainmybowl, @mxxxnshine
298 notes · View notes
shina913 · 11 months
Text
Nothing | KSJ
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Pairing: KSJ x Fem!Reader
Rating: 🔞M; NSFW
Genre: Established relationship; slice of life; fluff; smut
Warnings: dilf!Seokjin; cussing; fingering; quickie unprotected sex in a committed, monogamous relationship; creampie; soft-fluffy aftercare in the end.
Word count: 956 words
Summary: You can’t get laid while on vacation with your kids…or can you?
A/N: Believe it or not, this started off soft LMAO but...Idk what happened 🤡 Anyway, it's a random "missing Jin hours" night for me. And yayy I finally got to use this photo of Jin 😅 This is also unbeta’d so please excuse any typos or grammatical errors 😬
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It was a holiday weekend and your kids were finally out of school. You and Seokjin booked a little staycation to kick off your summer.
You can’t get laid while on vacation with your kids. It was a thought you both knew all too well. Still, you had to commend him for making an effort.
He went all out and booked a junior suite with an actual door that separates the bedroom from the sitting room. Your hotel room also came with a large couch that had a queen-sized sofa bed where the kids could sleep. He hoped that with the resort's family-friendly amenities, the kids would be thoroughly entertained and effectively drained of all their energy so they could sleep early, leaving some much-needed alone time for the both of you.
However, just as the kids were exhausted, you and Seokjin were too tired as well.
The following morning, you check your phone and see that it's just after 6 AM—Seokjin is still fast asleep. You slowly make your way to the door, quietly open it, and discover that both children are also sound asleep. Suddenly, you get an idea.
You smile to yourself, gently close the door, and lock it to ensure that you have some uninterrupted time. Then, you crawl back into bed and nudge Seokjin awake.
He opens his sleepy eyes to find you staring at him, your smile with a hint of mischief.
"Good morning," he mumbles mid-yawn and rubs his eyes.
"Hi. Want to have sex before the kids wake up?" you ask without hesitation.
It takes him a few beats to realize what you’re asking him. "Are you serious?" He frowns.
Your face falls; it wasn't the reaction you expected. "Oh--"
"What do you think?" he asks sarcastically. "When have I ever told you, 'No, I have a headache or my back hurts. It's too hot out or too cold. The kids wore me out today; My mom is sick; Diane is going through a divorce; My foot hurts, my hair hurts,'" he grumbles comically.
Sure, some of it is true, but you can't help but laugh at his ability to find humor in it.
"Baby, I don't need to be seduced. You’re my wife! All you've got to say is 'wanna fuck?'" he says at the end of his tirade.
You look at him pointedly and ask, "Okay, so...wanna fuck?"
He stares at you blankly for a second then rolls his eyes. "Yes, of course!" he says enthusiastically.
You suppress a giggle but fail as you watch him frantically push his boxers down and kicks them off. "Oh-oh…right now, huh?" You burst into laughter at his eagerness and take it as a cue to undress.
He begins to slide under the covers, parting your legs slightly so he could eat you out, but grab his shoulder to stop him.
“We don’t have time for that,” you caution him. “Besides, I’m already wet.”
He smirks playfully, sliding his fingers between your folds to double check. Your eyes roll to the back of your head as he pumps his fingers in and out of your entrance, taking a few moments to tease your clit.
“Jiiin…come onnn, please. Before Yuna starts banging on the door.” You could feel it in your bones. Every time you started fooling around at home, thinking your kids were sound asleep in their rooms, they would prove you wrong. Suddenly, you'd hear a little voice on the other side of the door, asking why it was locked. You could swear they had spider-senses or something.
“I just wanted a little taste,” he says before withdrawing his fingers to bring it up to his mouth to lick them clean.
Watching him drag his tongue to lap up your arousal turns you on to the point of no return. “Jin!” You whine, reminding him that you had a very small window of opportunity.
“Okay, okay,” he says gently before shifting his body to slot himself between your legs. “Ready for me?”
You nod and he braces himself. He sees you inhale sharply, and slides his length into your slick heat at the same time. As you exhale, the contact brings a different kind of high that electrifies you to the core.
You rock your hips to meet each thrust from him. Looking into your eyes, he tells you how beautiful you look and the way you're coming apart underneath him makes his cock harder. You pull his neck to bring his mouth down to yours, muffling your moans. He's hitting you exactly where you need him to.
Not a minute later, your back arches off the mattress as he swallows your orgasmic groans. He pounds into you, desperate to chase his own high. He buries his face into your shoulder as he empties himself into you.
You take a few seconds to nuzzle into each other, appreciating these rare but quiet moments where you can reconnect. It's a reminder that even though you have two children that take front and center nearly every waking day, your relationship will always take precedence.
"I don't hear them yet. Want to go get cleaned up first? I can go after you," he offers.
"Yeah," you answer, then give him a quick peck on the lips. You wince a little when he pulls out. You swiftly roll out of bed and dash into the bathroom for a shower.
After cleaning up, he pulls his boxers on and quietly unlocks the door, and leaves it ajar as if nothing happened. Just as he turns around to make the bed, your two children come barreling into the bedroom.
You laugh in the midst of rinsing off as you overhear them on the other side of the bathroom door, demanding breakfast.
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You’ve reached the end! Thank you so much for reading!
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Tagging:@internetjunkdrawer @itdoesntmatterwhy @yoongukie-ff @majamarantha
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sc0tters · 9 months
Text
The Last Hello | Mat Barzal
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summary: it’s been two months since you last saw Mat. but what happens when you are both in important roles in the event and Mat had been doing som personal evaluating.
request: yes/no
warnings: sad Mat, no real ending, slight use of strong language
word count:3.1k
authors note/ ending went to crap as I am tried so pls excuse any typos cause this wasn’t beta read. This is sort of a part two for The Last Goodbye, but I won’t make a series as this is the last part. both parts came be read separately but they make more sense in the way suggested (pt 1 then pt2). To the person who wanted Wedding Mat I didn’t know if you had a preference for whether or not he was the groom. So if I’ve gotten it majorly wrong just let me know and I’ll write you a new piece!
pt 1
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You wondered if you would have been seen as a bitch if you didn’t show up.
Sure you were the maid of honour, and sure you had said you could survive seeing Mat for a whole week again but that didn’t mean that you thought you could actually do it.
You hadn’t seen Mat in over two months after timing the pick-up of your stuff in his apartment whilst he was in New Jersey you were physically officially gone. It was the worst reality check that Mat could have ever come home to, the first sign was when your hat wasn’t on its hook by the door anymore and it only went down hill from there. The Canadian had contemplated all of the different ways to talk to you, he had called all of your friends and the ones who did pick up said you needed space. He even sat at your favourite coffee shop every morning for a week until one of the baristas who had seen the two of you in there plenty of times eventually told him that you started getting your coffees delivered to work and that’s why you hadn’t been in there.
It had been the hardest two and a half months of your life. When the islanders were knocked out of the cup you wanted to call him, when you saw a cat that reminded you of Marley. The ginger cat you snuck into your dorm and then had to give to Mat when your RA found out about him. That led to three happy years where you were proud cat parents before Marley got sick causing you two to have to put him to sleep, leading to a week of near none stop tears from you both. When you saw a couple at your favourite table at the local Korean BBQ place you wanted to tell him as it was an ongoing joke between the two of you. But your brain always told your heart to forget about it as there was no chance you were going to do that to yourself. Sure you regretted breaking up with him after you had some time to think about it, but you really never thought that he’d ever take you back. And besides with how things ended you knew that you missed the old Mat, not the current one who value love in the way that you did. Staying in New York was tough on your heart so you opted to moving further into the city where you were now in Rangers territory. Your one bedroom apartment was above this nice old lady who had three cats who all seemed to adore you. Felix the grey tabby cat made daily trips up the stairs to come say hello to you where he got his daily dose of cuddles from you. The best part about Margret though was that she knew nothing about hockey so you turned into an open good about your breakup with Mat.
It was refreshing being able to just vent to a totally outside party about it all “know you remember that if he gives you any shit you punch him okay,” Margaret’s words drew a laugh from your lips.
You loved how blunt she was “and then I’ll give him a second one and say it’s from you,” you nodded as you pulled her into a hug “thank you,” not only had she taken you to the airport but she had also convinced you to go to the wedding. Her words called you out for being a bad friend at the fact that you even considered not going just because of a boy. Whilst Mat was a little bit more than just some boy to you, you understood what she meant and were quick to book your flight to Kelowna just after that.
Sure you were disappointed that you weren’t going to make it to the bridal shower but you were swamped at work and Lenasia was just grateful that you could come to the wedding.
You and Mat had been asked to be the maid of honour and best man respectively as your friendship with the couple had gone on for years. It came as a shock when you announce that you and Mat had broken up but when both she and Ethan had confirmed with both of you that you were comfortable being around the other during the big day, wedding plans were quick to continue on.
After the long flight you thanked your taxi driver as you got out of the car “just when I thought you wouldn’t show up.” Ethan joked as he had seen your taxi pull into the street a minute ago from the kitchen window.
You let out a playful scoff “miss my Gracie Bear too much for that.” You pretty much stepped into the role of playful aunt whenever you saw his daughter. It was aided by the fact that she seemed to adore you “she’s just woken up from a nap,” he explained as he pulled you into a hug.
It felt weird for him as he had never heard your side of the break up from you. Sure Lenasia had relaid information onto him after you called her in tears one night, so he knew that you were just as broken as Mat was but it was tough not being able to say anything to either one of you about the other. The soon to be married couple wanted to meddle but they knew that it was best if they kept their noses out of it all “you better not be hiding my maid of honour E!” Lenasia called out causing you to giggle “where’s my beautiful bride?” You asked as you made your way into the cabin.
Your relationship with the girl has blossomed over the fact that your boyfriends played on the same team, when they went separate ways you still remained in touch never letting your friendship burn out.
Mat thought he was dreaming when he saw you walk in, the way you hugged Lenasia placing a kiss on her cheek before you picked up Gracie and proceeded to smother her in kisses eliciting a high pitched giggle from the baby. You looked good, there was no doubt about it. You had cut your hair and had even gotten those highlights that you had been contemplating on for like four years.
When the Canadian locked eyes with you everyone seemed to notice it. Even Gracie did as she made a little noise of complaint that she wasn’t your center of attention. Not wanting to be weird you let your face form a soft smile “why don’t I show you to your room,” Lenasia offered as she motioned to you to follow her.
Ethan watched as the three of you left as you still had Gracie in your arms “you okay bro?” He asked as he tapped Mats arm. That was the weirdest thing he had like ever seen the boy so “yeah,” the Islanders player nodded as he thought he was going to throw up. The idea of seeing you again was something that he once looked forward to, still desperate to get back with you Mat hadn’t accepted the fact that you two had broken up. Actually seeing you felt like a whole different territory.
A wave of nerves came over you as you guys walked past more bedrooms “since my cousin decided to come you have two options, there is a bed in Gracie’s room or-” Lenasia sent you an apologetic look as she felt bad for the situation you had been put into “it looks like we’re roomies.” You had cut her off because you knew the second option involved Mat, she hadn’t given any signs to indicate that matter but somehow in your heart you knew that he was apart of the unsaid statement.
You looked down to the clothes you were wearing and realised that you were in need of a change “I’ll let you take her whilst I go freshen up?” You asked as you held Gracie out for her mother to grab.
The first real moment of silence you got came and hit you like a truck. With the amount of unknown girls that were there you were glad that none of them were Mats date. Sure it didn’t mean that he was single, but it meant you didn’t have to watch him get all cozy with another girl.
Your body practically collapsed onto the bed as you were in need of a nap. The eight hour plane ride was finally catching up to you. But just as you were about to doze off into a peaceful slumber you heard that ever so familiar laugh “you look like you’ve just died,” Mat pointed out as he leaned against the frame of your door.
You rolled onto your side to look at him “been a long day,” you confessed as you had been up since five in the morning due to nerves.
What surprised you the most was the way Mat walked into the room and sat in the little arm chair that faced your bed. He wanted to talk but the words were not things that he could find “how were the parties?” You asked as you propped your head up by your hands.
It actually hurt Mat that you hadn’t asked him about himself and he meant that in the least conceited way possible. Maybe it was the fault of his brain or his heart but he truly thought that you could have at least asked how he was “they both went down successfully.” He nodded as he rubbed his chin feeling the stubble that was being to grow through.
You always loved it when Mat had a beard, it was a tradition at one point that if the Islanders made it into the playoffs that he’d let his beard grow for the duration of the teams time in the playoffs.
It might have sounded absurd but the action from the boy made your thighs clench “thanks for picking up my slack when I was gone.” You yawned as you smiled at him.
The Canadian watched as you rested your head on the soft padding that was your duvet “I’ll let you get some sleep,” his voice was soft as he pulled your blanket over you.
The way you mumbled a small thank you before you shut your eyes warmed Mats heart “I love you,” he whispered making sure that you were all tucked in before he left you.
So what he didn’t hear was how you said the same words back just as he walked out of your bedroom letting your sleep consume you.
Your love for Gracie was seriously being question by the way she continued to babble whilst the two of you were meant to be asleep “Gracie Bear please so me a real one and just go to sleep,” you pleaded as you knew that you were going to have to be awake early tomorrow for the long and hectic day that stood ahead.
When your requests went ignored you let out a sigh running your fingers through your hair. You really didn’t want to have to do it but if you wanted any chance of a solid night of sleep then you clearly had no choice.
So you muttered things to yourself as you grabbed your phone charger before you left your room making sure to kiss Gracie’s head on your way out. The way to Mats room was short, Lenasia had shown you where it was just in case you needed it. The thing that took the most time was mustering up the courage to actually knock on that door, it took three soft knocks on the door before Mat shuffled out of bed and opened the door.
Due to the height difference you were met with his chest “what’s up?” He asked as he let out a yawn surprised to see you there.
You rocked on the balls of your feet “can I sleep in here tonight?” You cocked your head hoping he’d say yes “Gracie won’t stop talking.” You added as you rubbed your eyes.
The boy laughed “sure,” he nodded as he motioned to you to come in.
The sight of his room made your heart feel at ease. The two single beds had the left one untouched and the right was where he clearly slept. He never used to have a side of the bed where he slept but when he learnt that you took the left side his only option was to become a right side sleeper.
You sat on what was now your bed as you just stared at the roof. It wasn’t often that you experienced being left speechless given that you were talkative by nature “I’m sorry,” Mat blurted out causing you to lift your head as you looked at him.
When he saw that you were confused he had to continue “for everything I did.” He shoved his hands into his sweatpants as he sat on his own bed.
All you could do was nod “you didn’t so anything wrong Mat.” You sighed as it was the truth. If he had yelled at you or cheated on you it would have made the end of your relationship not feel as forced.
Mat had spent the last few months reflecting “I’m sorry for what I didn’t do then,” he knew that it probably sounded better as your main reason what you had shared for breaking up was the fact that he no longer showed you love.
A smile formed on your lips “thank you,” was all that you could get out as you fiddled with the necklace around your neck.
You felt bare without your M necklace so once you gave it back to him you were quick to get a replacement chain as you needed something on your neck “we should probably go to sleep,” the hockey player announced as he looked at the digital alarm clock that sat on the table between you.
Mat simply hoped that the silence in the dark would give him more time to wrack his brain for things to say to you. Somehow he had all the time in the world whilst having none of the words.
A sigh fell from your lips “goodnight Mat,” you mumbled as you rolled over to let the sleep consume you.
Surprisingly the wedding was going really well. The ceremony was beautiful, you walked out to see Mat and swore you were going to cry but you kept it in because you knew that you’d wind up crying later.
Which was totally true, your tears struck in the middle of the couples speeches. Thankfully for you though you were sat next to Mat after two of the bridesmaids that were sat on either side of you wanted to sit next to each other. The Canadian noticed the sniffle you had as the tears welled up in your eyes, he was quick to lock his hand with yours “you okay?” He murmured into your ear as he shot you a concerned look.
You nodded as you raised your fingers to your face making sure to catch the tears that fell before they ruined your makeup “yeah,” you sighed “that was just really cute.” your confession caused him to chuckle. It hurt you both though because deep down inside as you listened to Ethan make his undying love speech to Lenasia, you both thought about Mat being in his shoes and you being in Lenasias. Your wedding although as hypothetical as it was, it was still something that both of you had thought out in depth having conversations and everything. The type of venue all the way down to the cake had been decided on. Mat would never intend on telling you this but he’s even had your engagement ring ready to go for the last ten months.
He was meant to propose on your big Valentine’s Day bash but with his injury that trip got canceled and so did your proposal.
The air between you two felt dense as people began to separate as they made their ways to the dance floor.
You decided to stay back was you had Gracie on your lap and as a result Mat stayed with you.
It wasn’t something that you expected him to do but nevertheless you appreciated it “she likes your bracelet,” the Canadian pointed out as he smiled.
Gracie made a string of noises before she looked up at the girl “she likes the fact that it’s shiny,” you explained shaking your head as you made funny faces at the girl.
Mat always knew that you were going to be a great mother “always thought you’d be like that to our kids.” He let his filter disappear as it caused your eyes to go wide “our?” You repeated as you hoped you had done so indeed.
You smiled as he nodded “we’d have a girl and a boy.” You had both agreed that you would have a minimum of two children as you both grew up with siblings and felt like if you were to have a child that they should do the same.
This rush of the feeling of content waved through your body “I want you to ask me again.” After only getting two hours of sleep due to the fact that he had been racking his brain for what to say, he had finally come up with the perfect answer.
Despite the not contact for two months, you knew exactly what he was talking about. “Do you love me?” You asked as you took a deep breath.
Whilst you knew that his answer was more than likely yes or else he wouldn’t have told you to ask him, you still felt like his answer might have been like his previous one.
Mat turned his chair so that he could face you “I love you so much that you’re the first thing that I want to see when I wake up and the last thing I want to think of when I go to sleep.” Your heart practically melted at the confession “you are my life, my happy and my world all in one, so I’m sorry I made you feel less than.” Usually be would have stopped with the first co session. Doing things like the second one were meant to be for massive moments.
And a massive moment is what this was.
Your Mat was officially back.
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justanamesstuff · 11 months
Text
All I Need
Chapter 10 (the final chapter)
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A/N: I want to thank all of you for supporting this fic so much since the start. Nothing would've the same without you, without your comments, wishes, excitement, encouragement, EVERYTHING. All of you that read it are a substantial part of 'All I Need' and I'll be forever grateful for it. I hope you like the end...have a happy reading, guys!!! 😘😘
Warnings: fluff, angst, swearing, smut (MINORS DON'T INTERACT!!!), baby in hospital, sickness, typos.
Word count: 9.8 K
Blog MASTERLIST
1 month later
Finally, the dynamic around the house came to a normal one. 
When Matty wasn’t away for a few days during the weeks doing shows –here and there– around the UK, he was at home with his girls. Amelia was stoic to have daddy’s time and attention. 
Y/n love to watch them play around the house, Matty was making his life purpose to play with his daughter when he had the time. Y/n would never admit it, but sometimes she sneaked behind the door after excusing herself to do some chores. Matty and Amelia were so engrossed into the game to notice that mommy was watching them like if it was a play. 
It was sweet to watch him when Amelia asked –as best as she could– Matty to play princesses. Over all, it was funny when she tried to make him fit into one of her tiny dresses. Matty was only able to fit his arms, and not even all the way. Whatever would make Amelia happy, her dad was ready to do. 
All of their games were fun to watch: from tea parties to being pirates. 
Y/n wanted to be as creative as he was, although her way to spend time with Amelia have to do more with watching films and spending hours without end drawing, or painting with their hands. 
Amelia and Y/n were in the middle of one of their’s mommy and daughter time before nap time watching ‘A Bug’s Life’, Amelia was getting a bit sleepy already. When, suddenly, Y/n felt a strange wave of heat brushed over her body. She got scared for a minute. Y/n stayed still, trying to find what was wrong inside her.
Trying not to startle her daughter, she managed to run towards the downstairs bathroom. All the content inside her stomach was flushed down the toilet a couple of minutes later. Y/n pushed the button, raising her hand as best as she could. Feeling tired after the sudden actions, she rested her forehead on the toilet for a second. 
Y/n tried to pick herself from the floor as best as she could. Once on her feet, she had a look at the bathroom mirror. The mirror's reflection showed a very pale woman. Y/n washed her face, hands, and teeth. 
Once again, beside Amelia, Y/n stared at her calmed face deep into sleep. She would let her sleep her nap on the couch. The spiral inside her head, ignoring the film, focusing on what was happening to her body.
If she was honest with herself, she hadn't kept her medical records really updated. What if…?
Y/n shook her head, trying not to think about the worst possible scenarios. Even when her mind kept pushing to think about how Amelia was going to lose her mother, and how Matty would manage being a single father. ‘It’s only a stomach bug’, Y/n thought for herself. Adding a mental note to book a visit with her doctor.
******************************************
Y/n stirred when a hand brushed the apple of her check. Her first instinct was to look after Amelia, she was on the floor playing with blocks of different colours. Y/n felt relieved, resting again on the cushions, closing her eyes. 
“So, am I invisible or what?” Matty asked from her side, surprising her. 
Matty was supposed to arrived two days later, even though he was there and that was what only mattered for Y/n. 
She opened her eyes wide, focusing on his form, “What the f-” Y/n couldn’t help to launch her body to be closer to him. Matty huffed, feeling her body on top of his. “You are home early!” Y/n shouted on his ear. The singer laughed about it, rounding her with his arms. 
Matty looked tired, although there was something about his hair –it was shorter, there were still long curls to ran her hands through– and his casual outfit –something rare on him–, that made Y/n felt feral about him. Nothing that she would tell him. 
“Hello to you too, baby.” Matty joked, happily, touching the width of her back. She was wearing the –his– blue hoodie, and his heart couldn’t help to skip a bit about her wearing his clothes. 
“Hi, Matty.” Y/n said more shyly this time, staring at his eyes. He was directly staring at her, making Y/n feel a chaotic mix of warm feelings inside her.
Matty let his right hand make its way towards the back of her head, “Come here.” he pushed her face closer to his, gently. Matty left a chaste kiss on Y/n’s lips. “Agh, I missed you.” he mumbled in them.
Y/n pushed back a little, “You went away for three days…” she pestered him. 
“Haven’t you missed me?” 
She faked thinking about it, “Mmm, I think I’ve noticed I didn’t have my personal heating at night.”
“Oh, am I an object for you now?” Matty continued inquiring her. Y/n felt his touch everywhere, being hyperconscious of him closer to her body. 
Y/n brushed her hair back, “What else then?”
Matty pouted visibly,  “Meany.”
“Stop crying, Healy.” Y/n pecked his lips sweetly, letting her lips detached from his slowly and painfully sexy for him. 
“And do what?” he replied suggestively, pushing Y/n’s body closer.
During the past month, the tension was raising, although neither of them dared to do something significantly about it. Matty and Y/n, both, were terrified about the idea of scaring away the other. Even though, they thought about being tangled with the other a lot.
Y/n rounded his shoulders, “Kiss me.” she said, directly.
Matty smiled wide. “My pleasure.”
Y/n tried to keep the kiss PG rated, because Amelia was around. It was hard when Matty was kissing her like they haven’t seen each other for years. She sighted loud. 
The sound, coming from her mother’s mouth, startled Amelia. The little girl paddled towards her parents.
“Mommy, mommy.” she tried to gain her mother’s attention, making grabby hands.
Y/n picked Amelia up, leaving her between their bodies. Matty groaned when Y/n moved far from his embrace, although having his daughter close made him happy.
“The Healy’s are needy people.” Y/n teased Matty. 
“Daddy!” she chanted, falling on her bum resting her back on Y/n’s side, even though she stared at her father with admiration. 
Matty rolled his eyes at Y/n, “As if you aren’t needy from time to time.”
“‘m not.” she defended herself, brushing back Amelia’s hair with only her hands.
“Do you want to be one?” 
Y/n knew what Matty was referring to, although she preferred to joke about it. “A needy person?”
“Aren’t we all a little bit needy?” Matty got distracted by the topic for a second. “But- No, I mean the other…don’t you-” he tried to continue his idea, getting mixed up with the words because he was scary of her reaction to it.
Y/n chuckled softly. It wasn’t common for Matty to be that shy, so she was going to take advantage of the moment, “What?” she asked, sporting a big smile.
“Forget it.” he muttered, stubborn. Matty changed his attention from Y/n to Amelia, leaning forward to be face to face at her high. “Mommy is being mean with daddy.” he informed her, pouting visibly. Amelia’s smile disappeared seeing his daddy looking sad, Matty opened his arms instructing her –silently– to be closer to him. She obeyed. “I need kisses.” Amelia planted a few open-mouthed kisses on his cheek. Matty didn’t want her to grow up any more. His little baby was perfect. 
“No! Tell me!” Y/n interrupted the little moment between father and daughter, continuing with the discussion.
“No, you don’t want. I get it. Fine.” Matty said, offended.
Y/n snorted, his frown wrinkling his forehead and the still lingering pout made him look so cute. “You never really asked!” she protested.
“You implied it.” Matty narrowed his eyes.
“Daddy!” Amelia called him. Matty looked down at her.
“Mel-mel!” he repeated her tone.
Y/n couldn’t stop smiling. She mischievous said, “I do want.”
“Stop.” Matty’s cheeks turning crimson with the implication of her words.
“Matty!”
“What?”
“Ask me!”
He was going to keep his front steady until the last consequences, “I don’t want any more.” It was his time to teased her a little. Tango is danced by two. 
“Baby.” Y/n started whining.
The singer tried with all his force to prevent the smile creping from the corner of his lips. “Fine.” Matty rolled his eyes at her. He waited a few seconds, extending the moment to make it more dramatic, then he asked,  “Do you want to be a Healy?”
Y/n made direct eye contact with him. “You’ll have to get down on one knee to find out.” 
“Fuck you!” Matty spat.
Y/n scolded him right away from it, “Matthew!” looking at Amelia staring at her parent's talk.
“Sorry, my love.” Matty kissed Amelia’s head.
“I love you”  Y/n said, still grinning from ear to ear.
“Oh, you’re in a mood today.” Matty stated.
“So, you don’t love me? Okay, perfect.” Y/n faked being angry. Sometimes it was fun for her to joke with him. Y/n knew that Matty was down for that kind of silly games with her. “I’m going to cook Amelia’s dinner.” she let her words linger in the air, not glancing at her daughter and father. Which obviously pissed Matty.
He started to protest from the couch, “Y/n, you started-”
“No, I get it, Matty!” she answered from the kitchen, gathering the ingredients she needed. “With all this models and beautiful girls surrounding you-” 
Matty stopped her abruptly, “Y/n-”
She continued to rant, without acknowledging his presence,  “I can see why you don’t love me any more. Three days away-”
Even with Amelia in his arms, Matty took Y/n by the arm, flushing her body to his. He shut her words with a strong kiss, making her feel weak on the knees. Y/n was the first one to break the kiss because she starts laughing nervously directly on his lips.
Matty pushed back a few centimetres to glance at her eyes, saying, “I love you, you’re the love of my life.” 
“Oh, really?” Y/n couldn’t drop the teasing, if she did, she feared she would fell to the floor. He made her weak like no one else. 
“Yes!” Matty was growing desperate with her.
“What about your daughter?” Amelia was resting her head on Matty’s shoulder, enjoying the warmth his body provided. 
“Our daughter. Half you…besides, that’s another universe of love…” Matty spoke messily, he wanted Y/n to know how deep he had fallen for her and how much she really meant to him.
“Right.” Y/n pattered his chest softly.
“I love you.” Matty sentenced in a very serious tone. 
Y/n looked at his eyes, “I love you, ratty.” 
Matty groaned loud, “Agh!” Y/n hide her head on his neck, kissing the skin there while she enjoyed his scent. 
***********************************
Late at night, Matty made himself comfortable in Y/n’s bed, behind her. He knew she wasn’t still asleep, even though the lights were off, and they were ready to drift.
The singer sneaked his arms, one under her neck and his right hand touching slowly her waist. His fingers made a loving path on her skin, until his hand rested with the palm open on her belly. Matty felt how Y/n’s body stiffened.
He tried not to look too much into it, feeling better when Y/n relaxed under his touch. Matty drifted minutes later.
—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Two days later
Right after Matty left for the gym, Grace showed up at the door as if she could sense when he wasn’t there. Y/n found that funny. 
Her best friend was nursing a cup of tea, enjoying the rare sunny day with Y/n and Amelia. The little girl took advantage of the day to explore the garden. From time to time she went from picking flowers, to kicking a ball –showing the Manchester United’ logo– long forgotten outside. 
“Fill me in.” Grace moved beside Y/n who was staring at her daughter to make sure she was alright. 
“About?”
“About you and the rat.” Grace said as if it was obvious. 
Y/n chuckled, “Are you ever going to stop calling him that?”
“Never.”
“Right.”
“So?”
“There isn’t much. We’re okay.” Y/n glanced down at her almost empty cup. 
“Are you trying for a baby yet?” Grace grinned behind the poetry, hiding it from Y/n. Amelia’s mother glanced at Grace with her eyes blanked. 
“We haven’t-”
“Why?”
Y/n tried to give Grace an explanation when she didn’t even have one. “We are taking things easy this time.”
“Oh, come on…you sleep together! Same bed! Are you still sleeping on the same bed, right?” Grace pushed her body closer to Y/n.
“Yes.”
“Then?”
“I don’t know, Grace!” Y/n shouted, frustrated.
Y/n’s friend held her hands up, showing her innocence…or trying. Y/n shook her head from side to side rapidly, trying to stop thinking about the matter for a second.
“Do you want to?” Grace asked the million question.
“Of course!” Y/n exclaimed way too quickly for her liking, so her hand went straightly to her mouth. Grace fell backwards on the outside couch, laughing very loudly. 
“Whore.” she moved her arms on the air, as she was envisioning a sign with the word. 
“Grace!” Y/n scolded her friend. It was a difficult mission as a parent to keep her away from the swearing.
“Sorry, mel-mel.” she shouted. “Mommy is needy!” Amelia came closer, titling her head, trying to understand her godmother’s words.
“Oh my god, Grace!” 
The little girl got distracted quickly by a bunch of butterflies around a bunch of flowers. She ran towards them. 
Grace went to ask, “Have you tried-”
“No.” Y/n interrupted her.
“Y/n!” Grace protested. “Are you going for a monk's lifestyle or what? He’s your boyfriend!” she pushed her body up again.
“Is he?” Y/n asked, making a weird face expression.
“I don’t know. Is he?”
“Maybe?”
“I swear…two idiots in love.” Grace affirmed, falling back once more. “Don’t be like your parents, Ames!” she screamed. 
“Thank you, Grace!”
“Hear me out, put some nice outfit…go on a date, and- you know!” Grace encouraged Y/n, knowing that from time to time her friend needed a little push to do the things she was excited about.
“What if he doesn’t want?” Y/n bit her nails, nervously.
“Bet you, a hundred quid, he’s going to say yes!” Grace sat back up. “Call him.”
Matty made his appearance, startling them, “Call who?”
“Fucking hell!” Grace cried out, making Y/n rolled her eyes at her. “Why you always do that, Healy?” she spat at him. 
Once Amelia’s sight fell on Matty’s form, she ran towards him, colliding with his legs. The frontman picked her up, kissing the crown of her head.
“Do what?” he asked.
“Come out of the blue, scaring the heck out of me!” Grace continued, meanwhile, Matty went to kiss Y/n openly in the mouth. Y/n’s friend inevitable grinned at them. 
Matty felt Grace’s staring, “What now?” he asked, not moving too far from Y/n’s side.
“Tell him, Y/n/n!” she chose to ignore his question, encouraging Y/n once again to ask him out.
“I hate you.” Y/n mumbled.
“Oh, no! You’re going to thank me later.” Grace winked at her.
“Tell me what?” Matty took a sit beside Y/n, leaving Amelia on the floor. He was scared of the two women conversations.
Y/n turned her body away from Grace, closer to Matty’s. She dared to ask him, “Do you want to go out?” with a lack of interest. 
Matty stared at her face. “Sure, don’t make it sound so fun, Y/n!” Grace screamed from between her hands, amplifying her voice, making Matty laughed.
“Are you asking me on a date, Y/n?” Matty combed her hair back, staring at her eyes and then her lips, making Y/n blush. 
“Yes?”
“I agree with the menace here.” Matty pointed, with a movement of his head, in Grace’s direction. “Ask me properly.”
Y/n closed her eyes for a moment, trying to ignore the embarrassment. “Do you want to go out with me, Matty?” she finally inquired.
“Yes.” Matty replied without skipping a bit.
“Told ya!” Grace pushed herself from the couch, jumping as a signal of victory. “Give me my money!” she extended her hand towards Y/n.
Matty stared at the pair of friends, “Excuse me?”
“I never agreed to that, Grace!” Y/n glanced at her best friend, offended. 
Grace fought back, “You considered it!” 
Y/n chose to ignore her, returning her attention to Matty.
“Tonight works for you?” he didn’t wait to ask. 
She wiggled her eyebrows, “Someone’s eager, Healy?”
“About a date with my girlfriend? Always.”
“Oh, girlfriend!” Grace teased her specially. 
“I hate her.” Y/n whispered for Matty, although Grace heard it.
“You don’t! And thank me because you’re going to get some because I’ll look after your daughter.”
“We can ask Denise…”
“Actually, no,” Matty scratched the back of his head. “She was doing some shit today.” 
“See?” Grace felt like she won the competition. 
Y/n’s friend was beyond happy for her friend, she couldn’t help to feel like the victory was more about that than anything personal.
*****************************************
Y/n walked down the stairs. Matty was waiting at the bottom of the stairs, looking extremely handsome from Y/n’s perspective. 
Even though she was the one to ask him out, he was in charge of picking the place. Matty only instructed her to dress comfy, a fancy restaurant wasn’t the option. 
Matty was wearing cream white trousers, a black t-shirt showing a simple design and on his feet a pair of black and white sneakers. It was so simple, although he pulled it off perfectly. Y/n, on the other hand, wore a black skirt –showing her legs–, a white plain shirt and Matty’s flannel on top. She carried a jean jacket on her arm, just in case the night was too cold. 
“That’s my flannel?” Matty asked first. 
“Maybe?” Y/n worried he might hate her from stealing it. “You left it in my bedroom…I can chang-”
The frontman took a few steps, stopping under the one Y/n was standing. He took her hand on his, leaving a kiss on it.“You look beautiful, baby.” 
“Because I’m wearing your clothes?” Y/n teased him. 
“Because you are beautiful and my wardrobe suits you.” he winked up at her. 
Y/n faked coughing, saying, “Territorial.”
“Ready?”
“Yes! Scared because I don’t know where are we going.” Y/n admitted, walking all the way down the stairs without letting his hand go. 
“You’ll see.” Matty replied, cryptic. 
“I’m going to say bye to Amelia, and then I’m ready.” Y/n told him, when they reached the floor. 
Grace was in the kitchen with Amelia. The little girl standing on a high bench made for her, so she can actually see when they cook or do something on the counter. 
“Oh, you look hot!” Y/n’s friend complemented her when Y/n entered the room.
“Thanks!” she said, lifting Amelia to hug her. “Are you going to have fun with Grace?”
“Yes.” Amelia giggled, hugging Y/n. 
Grace analysed her outfit, “That’s Matty’s…?” 
“Yes.”
“Sexy!” 
“Stop, Grace.” Y/n shut her. “Okay, bye mel-mel.” 
“Bye.” Amelia answered in her cute voice..
“Mommy loves you so” Y/n kissed her cheek soundly. “so, so, so” she continued, leaving kisses “much!” making her daughter chuckled and trying to hide from it. 
“Ove you, mommy!” she said back.
After the cute moment, Y/n left her again on the bench. 
She went to hug Grace from behind, “Behave!” she instructed.
“Off course not!” Grace snorted. “Have fun! I’m happy for you guys.” she truthfully said.
“I love you.”
“Stop with the goodbyes…you’re not going to die, you’re going on a date!”
For a moment, Y/n’s mind couldn’t help to go directly to the multiple times she had been sick during the past weeks. Again, she had forgotten to book an appointment with her doctor. She would do it the next day.
“Say it back, grace!” Y/n urged her.
“Fine.” she whipped her hands. “I adore your crazy ass!” Grace admitted. 
Y/n left a last kiss on her cheek, shouting a quick, “Bye!” running down the hall to meet Matty.
*************************************
Y/n got confused when Matty stopped the car in front of the studio. Her sight went from the iconic door to Matty’s face. He was making sure everything turned off. The singer wasn’t aware of her staring. 
“Are you going to work?” Y/n decided to be frontal about her doubts.
“No.” Matty chuckled. “This is all about you, us…” he said, taking her hand.
“Explain to me why we are the studio then…”
Matty leaned forward, kissing her softly. “You have to wait, baby.” he recommended her, leaving the car. 
Y/n saw him round the vehicle, going to open the boot. Matty closed it with a big sound, at the same time he carried a basket on his hand. She didn’t recall him putting it there when they got in the car. 
Matty made signals for her to follow him. Y/n did, hearing the sound of the security system being turned on by him.
“What that’s for?” 
“Y/n, I’m going to cover your eyes with something if you keep trying to guess.” Matty warned her.
“Kinky.” she cheekily said. Matty’s mouth opened and closed repeatedly, shocked with her words. Speechless, she left him. “This is not fair. I asked you out!” Y/n whined.
“I was faster to make a plan!” Matty offered her his hand, which Y/n took it happily.
Hand in hand, Matty conducted Y/n through all the halls and door the studio had until the last one appeared in front of them. The one leading towards the rooftop. 
“You’re crazy!” Y/n turned to tell Matty, after taking a look at the big blanket on the floor surrounded by cushions and fairy lights. She couldn’t believe he did all of that in record time for her.
“George is going to make me pay for this…forever.” Matty admitted, letting go of her hand to left the basket in the middle of the blanket.
Matty stood there, staring at her, looking around. Her eyes full of something that Matty hoped it was because of him and only him. 
“Do you hate it?” he nervously asked her.
Y/n returned her sight to him. It felt like a dream come true. “I love it, Matty!” Y/n moved faster to hug him tight. She was hoping it wasn’t only a dream. 
“Let’s eat then.” Matty shook her playfully. 
They spend a nice evening eating all the delicious food —Matty admitted that Grace helped him, detail that surprised Y/n–, chatting about everything —included their sunshine baby– and stealing kisses meanwhile the sun settle down behind them.
******************************
Y/n fell with a thud on the studio’s couch, bringing Matty down to rest on top of her. She held his head between her hands, kissing him, letting him know her intentions. 
Matty broke it, supporting his weigh on his arms. His short t-shirt exposing his strong arms, making her mouth watered at the sight. Y/n pushed her hips up to meet his, founding his hard on. 
“Fuck, love.” Matty hissed. “You deserve better than a quickie at the couch-” his words were interrupted by Y/n’s actions, letting her hand wandered down his body. She rested her right hand on his crouch, driving him insane. 
“Matty, I need you. I don’t care where.” she told him, staring at his face. His eyes were closed, enjoying her touch where he craved her the most; his lips parted, showing how moisturized his mouth was.
“I missed this so much.” Matty breathed out, bucking his hips forwards.
“Have you been thinking about me, baby?” Y/n squeezed his cock, making him drop a heavenly amount of moans from his mouth. Matty couldn’t care less if the neighbours could hear him.
“You don’t even want to know.” he managed to say through clenched teeth.
“Oh, I do want, my love.”
“Fuck.” Matty gained back some of his composure, tracing a path from her left knee towards her core under the skirt that droved him crazy through the whole evening. “You’re so ready for me.” Matty felt the wetness damping her lacy underwear. He needed to be inside her sooner, or he would explode inside his trousers. 
“Since we left home.” Y/n admitted, fighting with his zip. 
Matty got rid of his shirt, muttering a low and raspy, “Y/n.”
On a quick rush, Matty pushed his trousers and boxers down enough to have his dick out of them. Y/n stared at his form, feeling extremely hot. She couldn’t rip her sight from him, while she pushed her shirt up, revealing her breasts. 
Matty palmed himself, glancing at his favourite part of her. He didn’t want to wait any more. 
Y/n moved her panties to the side, silently telling him to penetrate her. Her wishes were his command, so he did. 
Matty let his body fell forward until their foreheads were touching. Y/n couldn’t even gasp out loud, feeling how he was slowly entering her. 
Once his tip touched her special spot, Matty took notice of her tight grip on him. He let his hands wandered towards her boobs, trying to patently wait for her to be comfortable enough. His blood was pumping hard in the veins all over his body, and her scent was infecting his senses. 
Y/n tried to breathe in and out, getting used to his girth –again–. 
“Please, Matty. Move!” she begged him.
With a wet sound, Matty let go the nipple he was sucking, replacing his mouth with his hand once more. He was obsessed with her breasts, he could spend an entire day just sucking and nibbling her nipples. 
“Are you sure?” he checked with her. 
“Please.” Y/n arched her body, pushing her boob further into his touch. 
Matty started moving slowly, keeping his eyes on her face, just to be sure she was alright. Y/n had her eyes closed, losing herself in the sinful pleasures he was driving from her. 
The singer protested against it, “Y/n!” he suddenly said, making her open her eyes as far as she could. 
“Mhm.” she replied to the call. 
“Eyes on me, baby.” Matty ordered her, retracting almost all the way out. Y/n whined. “Shush, be a good girl for me.”
“Mhm.” Y/n changed the intonation, trying to say she was. The words didn’t come to her mind. 
“Are you a good-” Matty stopped the words from coming out, when he pushed all the way in. “Are you a good girl for me, baby?” he fully asked this time.
“Mhm.” 
“Words, Y/n.” required taking her face on one of his hands, tight but without hurting her. 
Y/n looked at him through half opened eyes. “Yes!” she told him, feeling how he moved in and out more eagerly. “I’m…I’m!” she chanted. “Please!”
“Are you close?” Matty let go of her face, burring his on her neck.  Y/n let her legs round his middle. 
“So close!” she informed him. “Faster, Matty!” Y/n implored him.
Matty did as he was being told. Founding a good rhythm that worked for both of them. 
Y/n tried to keep her eyes fully opened when Matty returned to stared at her eyes. Their faces closer than ever, while their bodies moved in unison. 
“Matty-” she whimpered softly.
“I know, I know.” 
“I’m cl-”
“Come for me, baby.” he allowed her. 
Matty’s worked like magic over her tired body. Y/n came undone, feeling herself creamed all over Matty’s cock. Her pussy squeezing tight around him was what brought Matty to his own orgasm, pushing sloppily inside her cunt. 
Y/n wait until his released was done, touching his muscular back with all the love she had more him. Matty let his weight fell on her. 
“It’s never this good with someone else.” Matty, drunk of his orgasm, let it slip through his lips.
“Are you thinking about other girls when you’re still inside me, Healy?” Y/n tried to joke.
“What? No.” he mumbled on her skin. “I’m saying-”
“I know, baby. I know.” Y/n left a kiss on his sweaty forehead, making him sighed. 
**************
Y/n woke up, coming into the realization that they fell asleep on the couch after Matty pulled out of her. She couldn’t think too much about it because a new wave of sickness took over her. 
As gentle as she could, Y/n got out from Matty’s embrace and ran towards the bathroom. Being thankful there wasn’t a single soul at the studio, since she was fully naked. Minutes after, Y/n launched towards the toilet, emptying her stomach.
Y/n tried to be cool about it, rinsing her mouth and washing her face with cold water.
When she returned to Matty’s side, the singer woke up. 
“Y/n?”
Y/n sat on the edge of the couch, feeling how Matty extended his arms to touched her. “Hey,” she let her hand ran through his curls. “We should get back home.”
“Are you okay?” Matty glanced up at her face.
“Yes, something I eat must’ve irritated my stomach.” she told him, touching the area.
Matty let his hand rest on top of hers, pushing his body up. “Baby-” he caressed the skin of her hand. 
“I’m okay.” Y/n calmed his worries, touching his face. Matty went to kiss her, but she stopped him, “Don’t…” Y/n let her fingertips touch his soft and pinky lips. 
“Why?” Matty dissented.
“What if I have a virus or something?”
“Then we’re going to have it…” the frontman took her hand on his, placing it where his ‘true love’ tattoo was. “I’m not going to stop kissing you only for a bug.” he scoffed. 
“Matty…”
“You sure you’re okay?” his worries taking over again.
“Yes, but can we go home?” 
“Of course, my love.” Matty left a kiss on the corner of her mouth, partially respecting her point.
—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Weeks later
Y/n and Grace were in the living room watching Amelia stare with all the love inside her little body at the little animals on the screen. She was obsessed with PAW Patrol currently, and  she constantly asked for it.
Matty had been away for the whole week until that point. Grace was trying her best to distract Y/n because she noticed something was off, and her best friend wasn’t having a great time. Hence why Grace and Y/n were discussing which one of the boys was each of the dogs.
“That’s Matty!” Grace shouted.
“Of course not! Marshall is clearly George…he’s ready to extinguish Matty’s fires.” Y/n knew she had won the battle. 
Grace folded her arms, knowing she had lost the battle. “You’re so wrong.” 
Y/n laughed at her childish behaviour, reaching for her phone. Out of instinct, she opened Instagram, bumping into news about her boyfriend. A new article.
“Fuck, not again!” Y/n rolling her eyes at the article. 
That took Grace’s attention, “What?”
“Look.” Y/n let her have the phone to read the headline. 
‘Close source: Matty (Healy) is after a worldwide model.’  
“They never give up!” 
“Never.”
Grace returned the phone to its owner, when the device started ringing, showing Matty’s contact information.
Y/n answered calmly, “Hello?”
“Darlin’, I swear it’s not-” Matty rushed his words, trying to explain Y/n all he knew. 
Y/n cut him, “I know, baby.”
“I don’t know where this came from, and Jamie is talking with the journalist-” she could picture him, walking around his hotel room, tugging his curls anxiously. 
“Matty?” Y/n interrupted him again, trying to be as sweet and calm as possible. 
Although, he continued with his ranting. “Meet her once in my life, and it was years ago, I don’t even have her phone num-”
“Matty!” Y/n shouted sternly, walking away from Grace and Amelia. 
“What?”
“I’m not making the same mistake twice. I believe you.”
“You do?” her heart warming with his disbelief. The urge to have him close was strong.
“Yes, my love.”
“I can ask Jamie to talk with you if you need.” Matty offered, still not fully taking in that she believed his words.
“I don’t. I trust you, boyfriend.” 
“Thank god, baby.” Matty breathe easier. “Going through that shit again- I can’t even think about it.”
“Hey, hey…we’re okay.”
“Okay.”
“I love you.”
“I love you so much.”
“I know.” Y/n chuckled, feeling like a teenager. “When are you coming home again?”
“Tomorrow afternoon.” Matty complained about it, feeling like he had to wait years and not only hours to be home again.
“Perfect.”
A chaotic and repeatedly sound knocking on Matty’s door reached Y/n’s ear. 
“I gotta go now.” Matty informed her. 
“Okay, bye…I love you.”
“Bye, love you so much more.” Matty’s voice broke at the end. He wasn’t going to waste a single day without showering in his love.
“Bye, bye.”
Y/n held her phone, staring at the kitchen floor with a smile bigger than her face. Grace came from behind, startling her a little.
“I feel so single right now.” she protested.
Y/n felt a laugh coming from the depth of her stomach, shaking her body entirely. “Shut up!” 
“Maybe I like hi-” Grace commenced to joke about Matty, when her head turned around like a whip. “Y/n?” she called her, desperate.
“What?” Y/n answered without looking.
Amelia had starting puking on the living room’s floor. Grace rushed to her side when her body fought the surprise. 
“Y/n!” Grace tried again, being careful to not scream too loud to scare Amelia.
Y/n ran to them, moving Grace from the middle. She went to held Amelia, rubbing her back, trying to not freak out looking at the mess in the floor. 
After a few minutes, Amelia stopped. She looked down at the weird mass there, her eyes watering when panic stroked her little body. The little girl turned around crying with all the force she had left, going to hide on Y/n’s chest. She took her in right again.
“It’s okay, baby.” Amelia’s cries raised, breaking Grace and Y/n’s heart. “I know, I know. Mommy’s here.” Y/n rocked her softly, rubbing her back to sooth her.
“What’s wrong with mel?” Grace dared to ask.
“Maybe she ate something. I’ve been like this for a few weeks now. I’m starting to get worried about it.” Y/n admitted, not fully thinking about the words she was letting out, too focused on her daughter.
“Nausea?”
“No, no…only puking from time to time.”
An idea grew inside Grace’s mind, making her open her eyes wide. 
“Y/n.” she started.
“It’s probably some stomach virus-” 
Grace interrupted her, “Y/n!” 
Amelia’s mother, still holding the crying and scared baby, turned her head to look at Grace. 
“Excuse the formalities,” Grace excused herself. “Since when you haven’t had your period?” 
Y/n perfectly knew for what Grace was aiming.
“What? No, it’s not-”
“Y/n! Shut up and think!”
“I can’t remember!”
“More than a week? Two?” Grace counted with her fingers.
“More than a month and a half…” Y/n felt her cheeks hot.
“Fucking hell!” Grace shouted, making Amelia cry harder. Y/n stared at Amelia’s godmother, angry. “Sorry, sorry, baby.” Grace went to touch the little girl’s cheeks. “Y/n, you need to do a pregna-”
Y/n shushed her, “Don’t say it!”
“I’m going to drop by the shops and be right back.” Grace stood up, Y/n tried to stop her, but with Amelia in that state she had a priority. 
“Grace!”
“It’s fine, it’s fine…but you need to get rid of the doubt!” Y/n friend said, disappearing.
***************************
Y/n tried to occupy her mind and her hands with something else while Grace was out. 
After her daughter calmed down a little, she took her up to bathe her and change her clothes, since some vomit fell on her shirt. Y/n sang softly for her a little anthem that Matty came up for his daughter and only her. With it, she sensed Amelia relax, and even enjoy the bath time. Y/n managed to even brushed her teeth properly without a single tantrum.
Y/n let Amelia rest on the couch, keeping her body closer. They were watching a new episode of PAW Patrol, when Y/n’s hand rested partly on her forehead and crown of her head. The area was warm, way too warm. Y/n readjusted it to feel her forehead only. Amelia had a fever going on. Her mother kissed her head, deciding she was going to wait to see if it was related with her being sick earlier or not. 
Grace stumbled, out of breath, into the room, holding a brown bag. “Okay, here.” she extended the bag. When her sight fell on Y/n’s face, she asked, “Did she vomit again?”
“No…but I think she’s the flu or something.” Y/n let her know, without ripping her eyes from Amelia. 
 “I’ll stay with Mel…shout if you need help.” Grace rushed her to move, making signals with her hands. 
“Fine.”
Y/n took the bag on her hand without speaking one more word. She walked the short way to the bathroom, feeling like her feet weight like concrete. 
It wasn’t her first time taking one of those tests, so the process was quicker than expected. Even though the worries clouding her mind took all of her attention. Y/n couldn’t recall detail by detail what she had been doing for a few minutes.  
She let the sticks in the bathroom, setting the alarm to wait the minutes the instructions put. 
“So?” Grace asked right away.
Y/n took a seat at the other end of the couch, “Have to wait.”
“Okay.” her friend stared at her to then returned to the screen.
Y/n started tapping her feet on the floor, driving Grace crazy. 
“Stop that!”
“I can’t help it.” Y/n pushed her body forward, resting her elbows on her knees, rubbing her face way too harsh. 
“At least-” Grace started to talk when the timer went off.
“Can’t do it.” Y/n stood on her feet, walking from side to side. Luckily, Amelia had fallen asleep. 
“What?”
“Look for me.” Y/n begged.
“Fine.” Grace agreed to it. She moved, letting Amelia rest on the couch, and going to the bathroom. 
Y/n’s eyes fell on her daughter. The possibility of another beautiful baby like her, even a boy, made her heart fluttered. 
Grace didn’t spend a long time in the bathroom, returning with the sticks on her hand.
“Tell me.” Y/n hurried her friend.
“Haven’t seen them.”
“Then look!”
“Okay, first one…” Grace recounted what she was reading.
“Aha.”
“Negative.” Y/n’s friend said without imprinting an emotion to her words.
Y/n felt a wave of disappointment. “Mhm.” she swallowed thick.
“Second.”
Y/n didn’t speak, feeling a wave of sickness creeping her throat. She tried to keep it under control.
“Positive.”
“You have to be kidding me!” Y/n exclaimed, giggling.
“‘m not.”
“And the last one?”
“Inconsistent.” Grace told Y/n, looking directly to her eyes. She saw how Y/n’s smile fell from her face, turning to a worried expression. 
“So I might be?”
“Or maybe not.”
“Shit.” Y/n let her face fell on her hands. Thinking hard about it all.
“You need to do the blood test.” Grace stated.
“Since when you know so much about pregnancies?”
“Since my best friend had a baby, do you remember how it was with Amelia?”
“Yes.”
“Well, I did my research.”
“I’m going to call the clinic.” Y/n reached for her phone and midway stopped.“Grace, what if I am…what Matty is going to think?” she worried. 
“I don’t know, but I bet he’s going to be okay with it.” Grace took her hands between hers. 
“And if he’s not…what would I do?”
“Y/n, first thing first…call the doctor, do the test.” 
Y/n did as she was being told, booking an appointment for the next day. She needed to know and quick. 
—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The next day
Y/n opened the front door for Matty, holding Amelia, who refused to be away from mommy. Even the night before, Y/n resolved for them to sleep together –on Y/n’s bed– after Amelia refused to sleep in her crib. She made her point, crying for an entire hour. 
Matty had his hands full when he made his way inside the house.
“Hello.” he sang, especially for his daughter.
“Hi.” Y/n answered for both of them. Her sight going to Amelia’s face, “Say hi to daddy.” she encouraged her.
“Daddy.” Amelia shortly spoke, rubbing her eye, resting her head on Y/n’s shoulder.
Matty noticed something was clearly off, “What’s wrong, baby?” he dropped everything he was carrying, without minding the mess, going to check on Amelia. 
“She’s a bit sick.” Y/n filled him in Amelia’s current state. 
Matty brushed her curls back, approaching his face to hers. He wanted to take away whatever was bothering her little body and suffer himself instead of his baby.
“Oh, no! Come here.” he didn’t hesitate to take Amelia. “We’re cuddling until mel-mel gets better.” he adjusted her on his side, walking towards the living room.
Y/n followed behind them, sharing a silent look with Matty when he turned around to check she was in fact walking behind them.
******************************
“Matty?”
“Yes, baby?”
“I have to head out for a couple of hours…can you look after Mel?” Y/n asked for the favour. 
“Yes, ‘course!” he looked at the exhausted baby. Amelia had been drifting in and out of sleep, being interrupted by Matty or Y/n to drink water or check her temperature.
“I’ll be right back. Whatever happens, you call me, okay?” Y/n didn’t entirely want to leave when Amelia was that sick, although she needed to know what was going on inside her own body.
“Sure.”
Matty stared at Y/n, who leaned down kissing Amelia, being careful not to wake her. “Bye, sweet cheeks. I love you” 
“Mhm.” Amelia groaned on Matty's shoulder, without waking up.
“Bye.” Y/n pecked Matty quickly. 
Y/n left so suddenly that Matty wasn’t able to reply to her goodbye, and his mind started running in circles about what was happening to her. 
***************************************************************
Hours passed, Amelia was getting hotter and hotter. She whined constantly for half an hour, and Matty was unsure about his options. He tried to google but desist from it since nothing made sense online. 
He was worried and Y/n wasn’t coming home. The frontman send her a bunch of texts, but she wasn’t seeing them. 
When Amelia barely managed to open her eyes and her forehead burned his hand, he decided to start calling Y/n.
“Y/n, pick up, pick up.” he whispered, not leaving Amelia’s side. 
He stopped hearing the characteristic tone calling, to the robotic voice saying: ‘the line is out of…’. Matty cut it, staring at his screen. 
“Fucking hell, where’s she?” he said, annoyed, going to call her again.
He tried multiple times, checking Amelia between tries. The same answer over and over again. Matty wasn’t going to quit until Y/n’s voice came from the other end of the line.
“Please, baby.”
One, two, three tones…
“Hi, Matty.” Y/n picked up.
“Finally! Where the fuck are you?” he shouted at her.
Y/n’s voice shaking from fear, she pictured the worst, “What’s wrong?”
“Where are you?”
“Stop replying with questions! What’s going on? Amelia”
“Amelia is boiling, Y/n. She’s whining, and I don’t know how- I’ve tried everything. Nothing is working.” 
“Did you take her temperature?”
“Yes, Y/n. She’s almost at 40º C”
“For how long?”
“‘Fuck I know. I’ve been trying to bring it down, it’s impossible…and calling you- I’m going to take her to the ER.” he concluded.
“Okay, I’ll meet you there.” Y/n agreed silently that it was the best option.
“Where are you?”
“Um-”
“Y/n?”
“Which hospital are you going to take her?”
“The closest one.” Matty let Y/n know, going to pick his wallet and jacket. 
Y/n decided to be frontal about it, “I’m here.”
Matty stopped death in his tracks. “Y/n, please. What the fuck?”
“I’m okay, I’m okay.” she quickly reassured him.
“You almost gave me a heart attack!”
“I’m sorry, I’ll explain, okay? Just bring Amelia to the ER. I’ll be there.” He needed to be hurry up. 
“Okay, okay.”
“Bye.”
“Bye. I love you.”
“Love you, please hurry!” Y/n said before the line cut.
—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Y/n was at the front desk, talking with two nurses, when Matty rushed in holding Amelia.
“Them!” Y/n said to the older woman, signalling with her fingers to father and daughter.
The youngest one walked closer to Matty, ready to take Amelia in her arms. When he didn’t move a muscle, the woman ordered, “Let me carry her.” with a calmed voice as if she went through situations like those a hundred of times.
“No.” Matty refused, making the people –waiting in the waiting room– to look at him. 
“Matty-” Y/n tried.
Matty stared at the nurse, saying, “Let me know where I have to take her.”
“Sir, we need to check her.”
Y/n went to stand beside Matty, touching his back. “It’s okay, she’s going to be okay.” Y/n tried to keep the calm.
Matty stared at Y/n. After an eye battle, he let the nurse take Amelia. They followed her to a room. 
“Stand there.” she instructed for the parents.
Y/n took his hand, squeezing it hard. They were too focused on Amelia laying at the emergency room’s bed to notice the doctor coming to check their daughter.
“Daddy.” Amelia moved her head, raving from the fever. Matty’s instinct was to be close to her, going to stand beside the rudimentary bed. 
“Sir, please stay back!” the doctor instructed him.
“Let me hold her hand.” Matty implored.
The doctor stared at the singer, thinking how to say no, when Amelia screamed again, breaking the silence of the room, “Daddy!” Matty didn’t wait for the man’s reply. His daughter was calling him.
“Okay, but stay out of the way, so we can work.” The doctor defeated by the parent. 
“Mhm.” Matty don’t even thank her, holding Amelia’s hand and brushing her wet curls back. Y/n tried to keep her tears at bay, her heart swelling for her baby girl. “We’re here, mel-mel. Mommy and daddy are here with you.” Matty whispered only for her. 
After a while, the doctor looked between Matty and Y/n. Choosing to talk with her. 
“Are you her mother?” she inquired. 
“Yes.”
“We need to take her to the operating room right away.”
Y/n felt how her blood disappeared from her head, going directly to her feet. She held a chair beside her, preventing from falling down.“What’s going on?”
“Her appendix has exploded, or it’s about to do it. We need to operate with urgency because it can cause irreversible-”
Y/n abruptly interrupted her, “Don’t tell me. Just do it, help her, please!” she pleaded desperate.
The doctor nodded with her head, deciding to keep her silence. She shared a look with the nurse, who went to give Amelia a painkiller.
“Sir, you need to move now.” 
“Matty-” Y/n called him.
“What are you going to do with her?”
“They need to intervene her, Matty.” Y/n explained.
The nurse tenderly instructed them, “Please, go to the waiting room. I’ll keep you guys updated, I promise.” she said more for Y/n than Matty.
“Thank you.” Y/n thanked her.
Matty and Y/n saw how they took Amelia away.
********************************************
Waiting room
Y/n studied the people around the waiting room. She needed something to focus while waiting. The nurse appeared –as she promised– from time to time saying everything was okay, but they still were working. 
“Here.” Matty offered Y/n a coffee, arriving after visiting the hospital’s buffet. 
Y/n rejected, “No, thank you.”
“Y/n, you need to drink or eat something.” Matty took a seat beside her, placing her arm around her shoulders. 
“I know, but-”
“‘m also scared althoug-”
“Matty, it’s not that.” she stopped him. “I’m 100% sure everything is going to be fine. Amelia is going to be fine.” 
“Yes.” Matty bobbed his head. “What’s then?”
Y/n kept her silence, returning to look around the room. Matty didn’t push her, although his mind instantly went to his principal worry before Amelia got worse. 
“Why were you here? Are you okay?” he took a sip of his coffee, oblivious to Y/n’s next announcement. 
“I-” she started, worried of his reaction. The words getting stucked on her throat.
“Y/n-” Matty took his arm away from her body, turning to the side to fully stared at her face. Trying to find the answers he was craving. 
“Remember how I’ve been feeling sick from a time to now?�� Y/n asked, without hesitation this time. Her sight falling on a little boy running around his father. 
“I do.”
“Amelia puked yesterday, and I told Grace that we probably caught something…which now I’m sure it wasn’t that-”
Matty wanted to skip the extra details, so he interrupted her rant,“Y/n!”
“Be patient!” Y/n took his hand on hers. “So, Grace suggested something I really didn’t think about…”
“What?”
“When I had my last period.”
“Okay?” Matty continued to look at her puzzled. 
“I couldn’t remember.”
The realization of her words hitting him, “Y/n-”
“That’s not everything. She brought pre-... tests for me to do.” 
“Baby-” Y/n ignored him
She continued, “One negative-” 
“Shit.”
“One positive.”
“And the other?” Matty touched her chin gently, forcing Y/n to look directly into his eyes.
“Doubtful.”
“That’s why you came here.” Matty concluded.
“Exactly.”
He waited for her so say more, so when she didn’t, he added, “And?”
“Please, don’t be mad at me. It’s fine if you don’t-”
“Y/n, are you pregnant?” Matty breathed out.
“I can’t drink that” she pointed towards his coffee. “For 9 months…or more. Do the maths, Matty.” she gifted him a smile.
“Never been the smartest. Please, say it.” Matty mumbled.
“We’re going to have another baby, Matty.” Y/n felt the tears on the corner of her eyes. Matty started crying silently. 
“Oh my god!” Matty directly placed a hand on her belly. “How long?” she dried his tears falling through his cheeks. 
“Doctor says I’m almost at 11 weeks…which is almost 3 months in.” Y/n shared with him. The news better sweet with the place and the situation they were surrounded by.
“Mel is going to be a big sister.” Matty stated, not tearing his sight and his hand from Y/n’s belly. 
“Mhm.” Y/n couldn’t help to keep crying.
“I need to hold her for a week after this.”
“She’s going to love that.” 
Y/n was interrupted by the doctor calling after them, “Healy?”
“Yes!” Y/n and Matty stood from their seats, rushing to meet her. 
The doctor instructed, “Follow me”
They indeed followed her though halls and stairs, finally stopping at a hospital room. The light inside was dimmed, Y/n and Matty gasped when they saw Amelia sleeping on the bed. 
“She’s under the effect of the anaesthesia.” The doctor informed Amelia’s parents. “Probably going to wake up soon. Amelia’s going to be scared of the effect, probably, so be patient. When she does wake up, touch the red button and the nurse is going to check on her.” she finished.
“Is she alright now?” Matty asked her.
“Yes, she’s out of risk…if you waited a few hours-” She stopped talking, they fully understand.
“Oh my god!” Y/n touched her chest, where her heart was.
“You did right.” she reassured them.
“Thank you, doc.” Matty held his hand towards her, she politely took it, shaking it shortly. 
“I’ll see you guys tomorrow morning.”
“Good night” 
She got lost between the halls connecting all the rooms. Matty and Y/n went directly to stand beside Amelia.
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Three days later
Amelia was recovering as expected. She was tired of being away from her house, even though Y/n and Matty tried to ease it for her. They brought her favourite toys from home and even all her favourite people –the guys, Tim, and Susanne– called her. Grace and Denise dropped by right away when they found out Amelia was in the hospital. 
They knew it was the last hour for them in that room. Amelia was ready to be back home, as well as her parents. 
Grace came in meanwhile Matty was putting on display a play for Amelia. He wanted to distract her and made her laugh to make the hour to pass quicker than it felt. Y/n was in the bathroom since she reportedly to have to pee even more than before. 
“Hello!” Amelia’s godmother shouted from the door holding balloons in her hand.
“Ace!” Amelia changed her focus of attention from her father to Grace.
Matty wasn’t happy about it, “Crushing my play…thank you, Grace!”
“Shush.” she dismissed him, going to Amelia. “This is for you, mel-mel!” Grace let her hold the threats holding the balloons. Amelia laughed watching them bounce on the air.
“How are you?” Grace checked on the little girl.
“She’s better.” Matty answered for her.
Grace turns to look at him. “Was talking with my god-daughter.” she rolled her eyes at him.
Matty went to say something; but Y/n interrupted, returning to the room. “You guys are never going to drop it?”
“Never.” they say in unison. 
Y/n shook her head. Matty walked closer to his girlfriend. Amelia’s mother felt his arms sneak around her, touching her belly. It was a habit he had when she was pregnant with Amelia. Matty was bringing it back now. 
Matty kissed the side of her face, when Grace interrupted their moment.
“Oh my god!” Y/n stared at her friend, knowing. 
Y/n moved away from Matty. “What?” she asked, faking being oblivious about her surprise. She knew Grace knew.
“You are?” 
“What?” Matty interfered. 
“She knows.” Y/n silently said it was okay to share the news with Grace.  
Grace started crying. “Oh my god!” she went to engulf Y/n in a hug, pushing Matty away from them, “Go away you”
“Hey!” he protested. “I’m the father!”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Grace brushed him off, making Y/n laugh.
Matty returned to Amelia’s side, half whispering, half shouting, “Your godmother is crazy.” 
“And I was starting to like you…” Grace warned him. 
“Really?”
“Don’t steal the moment!” she shouted from Y/n’s shoulder. “I can’t believe you’re going to have another baby!”
“Who’s having another baby?” Denise showed up at the hospital door. Grace and Y/n break the hug, smiling at Matty’s mother. 
“Grace and his big mouth!” Matty groaned. “Hi, mom.”
“Nana!” Amelia clapped for her.
“Hi, sweets! How’s my favourite grandchild?”
“Well, she’s not going to be the only one now…” Grace muttered.
“Grace!” Y/n and Matty yelled at the same time from opposite sides of the room. 
“What?” Grace made her shoulders move up and down, innocent. “If I know, you have to tell your mom, Matthew!”
“Tell me what?” Denise said.
Matty and Y/n shared a look. Y/n bowed her head, instructing Matty to just tell his mother. “Y/n is pregnant”
“Are you the father?” Grace and Y/n burst into a fit of laughter at Denise’s antics. 
“Denise!” Matty scolded her. “Of course I’m the father!”
“Are you sure?” his mother teased him.
“Learn from your mom how to be cool, Matty!” Grace suggested him. 
Matty ignored his comment, replying to his mother, “I am sure.” 
“Really?”
Y/n approached him, resting her hand on his back,  “Don’t say it too loud, Denise. Or some tabloid is going to pick it up.” she tried to redirect the conversation.
“Jokes aside, I’m so happy for you!” Denise admitted, drying tears from her eyes. “You’re going to be a big sister, Ames!” Amelia’s grandmother shouted, making her titled her head without understanding what she was saying
“We haven’t had the chat…” Matty said.
“Oh, okay!”
Before they can continue, the doctor came in. 
“Okay, time to leave, Amelia Healy!” she smiled warmly to Amelia.” I’ll ask the family to wait outside, except the parents.” 
Grace and Denise left right after, respecting the protocol.  
“Please, sign this while I check her one more time.” she gave Y/n a paper to put her sign in, allowing Amelia to leave the hospital.
When all the check-ups are done, the doctor informed the little girl, “Now it’s official, Amelia. You can go home with mommy and daddy!” The little girl clapping, making the rest of the presents laugh.
*******************************************************
Time to return home…
Matty placed Amelia gently on the special car chair for her, making sure not to mess with the bandage on her belly. 
Y/n watched her boyfriend —father of her children, and love of her life—, jog around the car coming to the driver's seat.
When Matty drove out of the car park, Y/n turned the radio on. A very familiar chords reached their ears. ‘All I Need to Hear’ was on the radio. 
Y/n grinned big, feeling how Matty took her hand to left it on his tight. During the journey, Matty’s hand travelled from the stare wheel to Y/n’s belly. 
She admired the side of his face, turning after to make sure Amelia was alright. The little girl fell asleep with the car’s movement. Y/n returned to look at the love of her life, feeling like the future was with them together in it. The four of them and all the people that witness Y/n and Matty’s love story. 
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bookofmirth · 3 months
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Did you like cc3 or love? Neither?
oh hello, why don't you pull up a chair because I have finished this book and I have Thoughts. I was thinking for a good chunk of this book that I would give it 2 stars. I still might. It depends on how it sits with me over the next couple of weeks. I ended up giving it 3 because I did enjoy some parts.
I will start with the more positive thoughts.
I am glad that the crossover was limited. One of my fears was that the series be unavoidably intertwined from here on out, so that pleases me.
I really did like seeing how Nesta has grown, her friendship with Azriel, and seeing more interesting things with his powers! That was really neat.
I did laugh out loud a couple of times, at points where I was supposed to laugh out loud. I think Tharion is dumb as hell but he made me chuckle.
The scene with Ithan and Sabine towards the end was good, I was like Gordon Ramsay, finally, some delicious fucking consequences.
Ummm... I like Ruhn and Lidia still. They had some silly moments, but overall they are the only characters in this book that I still have a shred of respect for. Maybe Perry and Sathia. Everyone else is on thin fucking ice.
Shout out to the one (1) line Bryce said that I liked: “I’m sick and tired of people using 'girl' as an insult.”
Unfortunately, the list of things I didn't like is far longer. I'm actually going to put it under the cut if people don't want their enjoyment spoiled or simply don't care.
In my opinion, sjm is a good storyteller, and an okay writer. This book really, really highlighted that for me. The plotting was a mess, I was constantly going back a page because I was confused about what was going on, there were weird inconsistencies that only made sense if you stepped back from the book and thought "well, the author needed that to happen, I guess."
There were some typos and word choice errors that should have been caught - "every muscle in Bryce's body went taught" and then a missing quotation mark (But it was Aidas who answered, pride flaring on his face. Apollion slew her with his Helfire when she attacked him—he pulled her burning heart from her chest and ate it.”). Not to mention the 255 "could have sworns" and 50-something "as if". I noticed a few similar phrases to this. If I'm feeling spicy one day maybe I will go back and find them.
The number of times she says "by whatever power" or "somehow" in a book where she has spent a lot of time explaining the power, and we should know what the "somehow" is???
Who in the ever loving fuck thinks that splitting up two tense scenes by cutting them into bite sized pieces and then interspersing them together is a good idea???
There were multiple times when I laughed out loud at scenes that were not meant to be funny, because they just seemed so dumb. Like... Ithan "accidentally" beheading Sigrid. Excuse me?? lmao (I edited this one because in my annoyance I misrepresented that a bit)
The tone was so, so off. That was a big source of my inappropriate laughing. Like, Hunt thanking Urd that he had such a loyal, fierce badass mate. Or a chapter starting with Ruhn saying "nah". I think this is because the genre could not decided what it wanted to be. SJM was still writing like this was high fantasy, but then used the word "like" in the way that I use the word "like". I do get that this is urban fantasy and she tried to smush it with a high fantasy (a high fantasy with very little world building, but still), but I really do not think that this genre serves sjm's style of storytelling. At all.
Dear powers that be in whatever heaven that exists, please stop letting sjm describe every single character as the most strongest beautiful fiercest loyal badass tough unflenching etc etc etc. I fucking beg. One of the big reasons that I dislike pretty much every character in this series is that they ALL HAVE THE SAME PERSONALITY.
Bryce is annoying as hell. I could write a whole essay on her but she is easily my least favorite sjm character EVER.
I am bitter at feeling like I needed to read this book when, after hosab, I would have given up on this series if not for the crossover.
The crossover really did feel like a "teehee I can do this because I want to" with very, very little thought as to how it would actually make sense. A crossover like this should NOT be done by someone who doesn't outline, and who pantses their writing. Pantsing is fine in itself! Pantsers should be barred from writing this kind of book.
Hunt's dick is too big for his underwear.
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winterandwords · 7 months
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For the writers living with chronic illness and physical disability
I'm going to get into writing and posting this while my brain is still half asleep and before I change my mind because it feels too personal and I don't do that online. Please excuse any typos.
Comments on a recent post of mine about wanting to write but not being able to got me thinking. I'm chronically ill and physically disabled. I have been for most of my adult life (I'm 42 now). It's been progressing slowly throughout that time and more rapidly over the last few years. It is what it is.
I don't talk about it in detail on the internet because it's impossible for me (not saying other people can't do this) to accurately represent the full experience in a way I feel comfortable with while still engaging enjoyably with an interest-based community, which is what I'd rather be doing here.
Also, people get fucking weird about it. I have no patience for *pat on the head* "well done for existing" consolation-prize pity bullshit or inspirational cripple bullshit. Equally, I have no patience for being dragged into a who-has-it-worse competition that I'm never going to take part in because I don't see the world that way or a what-about-me-ism-fuelled derailment session.
This shit is complicated. I'm on Tumblr to write and to talk about writing. But if I'm also quietly dealing with all that other stuff alongside making up some guys (gender non-specific) in my head and putting them in situations, I know some of you are too.
And you know what? It's hard. I know it is. We live in an inaccessible world and so many parts of that world and so many people in it can be brutally hostile towards chronic illness and physical disability in ways that still shake me to my core when I encounter them. It no longer surprises me, but it still fucks me up on the regular.
But listen. YOU ARE CREATING. You're doing something huge and worthy and valuable and fucking difficult. You're carrying the weight of all that other shit and YOU ARE STILL CREATING. It might take you longer than you'd like and you might be doing it in ways that are far from ideal, but you are still doing it.
You might feel excluded from communities and events and conversations, not necessarily because anyone is intentionally excluding you, but because you have no option other than to do the sick-person version of things and it's impossible not to feel like you're on the outside looking in sometimes when that's your experience.
The point of all this is that I want you to know with my whole heart that YOU ARE SEEN. Your strength and your determination and your sadness and your rage and your pain and your more-able days and your rock-bottom days are all seen.
Your challenges and your messiness and your perfectionism and your complexity and your dichotomies and the unrealistic standards and demands you have internalised from existing in an ableist society are witnessed and felt, widely and deeply, and with a solidarity unshakable enough to hang bridges from.
I'm not going to tell you that you're good enough, because it should go without saying. I am going to tell you that you're not alone, because that does need to be said. You are so much more than a conditionally-acceptable exception and you deserve to reach and exist beyond the boundaries of the small boxes you get shoved into without your consent or permission. YOU ARE SO MUCH MORE.
Alright? Alright. Keep going 💜
In case this gains any sort of traction and people start replying to it or reblogging it, I want to make something very clear. I am also neurodivergent. That is not what this post is about. I also have lifelong experience of mental illness and trauma. That is not what this post is about. This post is about chronic illness and physical disability and it's for people who are living with those specific things, whether or not they're also living with the other things.
So, in the most loving way, if you have something to say that isn't about that, this isn't the place to say it. Thanks.
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hypnosiacon · 4 days
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hi im not the hate anon but um im not sure what your main is ? but i wanted to ask how a "non disordered" system would work , especially while still being traumagenic ? /genq
im not trying to be rude or start shit im just genuinely trying to understand 😭
In our pinned there's two vlogs we tagged as "we follow from". The whisper-overseer is our go-to, the other one is for mogai related stuff, so it isn't active. I also am going to present some links which lead to reblogs on my main.
Anyway, back to business. I am warning that I struggle with words in general and I am pretty sick, so if there are typos or any other mistakes - that's normal. Excuse me while i type every way of being a system on general. I touch all parts just to make sure.
First, I'll present the fact that recent diagnostic documentation says that having multiple personality states is not a red flag of OSDDID, as it can present itself in a spiritual practice as example. This post (link) has resources that touches non-OSDDID plurality, although they can be outdated.
Second, disorders often have symptoms similar to the other. Psychosis ans Shizo-spec can manifest it's symptoms as a plural system, be it delusions (that may or may not end up being or becoming a fact) and hallucinations. Voice hallucinations can gain sentience and act as separate, rendering a person as a system (of course if they call themselves that). BPD also brings a whole lot of dissociation and identity disturbance similar to OSDDID, and even a pinch of psychosis. Not to mention a lot of disorders create a separation between a body and a mind, which can in general a form of dissociative division too. Remember how alters often split for a reason? There a consciousness can create a new identity specifically for masking. And some of them can even take a lot of them, as in NPD in search for attention. These are just adaptive ways, some of these disorders ARE traumagenic, so the plurality caused by them can also be.
Also, there's spirituality. A lot of non-Christian cultures have a belief about consciousness and identity being more than one, sometimes even infinite. Theres a Post (link) made by a DID system that discusses it and the problems with "part" language too. But from my perspective - I am Heathen, a Norse Heather to be exact. In practice in witchcraft people sometimes create their own spirit servants for specific tasks, ask spirits for assistance and so on and so forth, for example for coping too. These spirits can gain sentience and control over time. In Norse spirituality even every human has several parts, and, as we see in Odin and his ravens - an Astral form, at least one of them can even show itself in several distinct and divided parts.
Also, it just baffles me, how we can identify as animals and even objects and concepts and not believe in endogenic plurality? Alterhumanity in general encompasses both, and we all agree that identifying as a dog or a zombie can have a disordered origin (delusions for example), but it doesn't have to be. If our brain can create a new consciousness by itself, why can't we make one by ourselves? It doesn't have to be intense to the point of harmful dissociation. I was friends with THREE created systems, where two were intentional and one accidental due to roleplaying. What matters is that it wasn't something they could control after they gained a headmate or so. If they're roleplaying or faked, they would know, they would be able to control it, but they couldn't.
OSDDID doesn't have a copiright claim on plurality. Tulpamancy, Soulbonding and Daemonism all been there before, and they are types of plural experience too. And creators often claim, non-ironically, that they actually hear their characters. Something we shouldn't forget about. Roleplay for example can be a form of escapism until you realize that you can't control it.
And the last one - rqs are the bad apple of the whole community. They claim to have something they don't, when people without a disorder, be they endogenic or not, specifically say that they don't have OSDDID. Something we had to point out at numerous times. I am not claiming to have a serious disorder with traits such as amnesia and dissociation, I am claiming to have several people in our head, with which we can communicate and can't control. Even if I have OSDDID it changes only the fact of our symptoms, not the fact that we have headmates. Remember, headmates are only one, even if important, trait required for OSDDID diagnosis. It classified as a dissociative disorder, not a multiple identity disorder, and not a traumagenic disorder either.
Who I am to judge how people experience life? I had friends disordered and not. After you talk to people you realize that it doesn't matter. We're all quite similar anyway.
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generic-whumperz · 9 months
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Intro Post & Masterlist(s)
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THIS BLOG WILL CONTAIN ADULT CONTENT, VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED! 
Anything explicitly NSFW will be marked “Mature,” but still this isn’t really a kid-friendly space so minors please DNI!
Side blogs:
•@generic-whumper (SFW whumping) •@generic-throw-away-blog (random bs & some fandom stuff) •@generic-writing-tips (exactly as it sounds) •@generic-horror-slut (for just straight up horror and gore)
The Aid Masterlist (current WIP, 18+)
Other works can be found at the bottom of this post under “Story Stuff,” but there isn't much else because I'm focusing on The Aid for now.
Congratulations, you have stumbled upon another (generic) whump blog, hence the name! New whumper in town, made this blog Aug 2023, and just started writing. Currently just working on one story right now (yay hyperfixations), that is slowly consuming every waking thought. Help
Other blog info below the cut!
About me:
🔪I prefer to be anonymous on here, so just call me “Generic/Gen,” them/them, mid (quit lying to yourself) late-20’s.
🔪Dyslexic bitch & silly goose—please excuse typos, misspellings, and any grammatical errors! I don’t have an editor or beta reader, so cut me some slack; I re-read and edit as best as I can, but my brain be playin’ tricks on me, and shit falls through the cracks! Just manage your expectations is all I’m sayin’, I’m not a professional.
🔪I’m (unfortunately) an American and my obnoxious word choice will probably reflect that.
🔪I’m currently a full-time college student taking a fucking break! But still, any written works I choose to share will not be uploaded on a set schedule (I write slow, my brain only occasionally works, & I’m busy), I apologize in advance!    
🔪I run a queue- there I said it! I am shameless about it, and nah I won’t tag it.
🔪I’m not a professional writer nor am I going to school for an english degree. I write for funsies and this is mostly just a hobby for now.
🔪Lover of cryptids (Mothman fucks), paranormal enthusiast and certified Haunted™️. Weird shit WILL leak into my writing eventually. Don’t be surprised if a ghost or skin walker makes a cameo. It’s more fun this way, just go with the flow.
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What You’ll See Here: 
All types of Whump; I’m talking all of it bay-bee (detailed types below this section), including: polls, writings, prompts, tropes, scenarios, art, gifs, etc.
Reblogs-a-plenty
Really bad home grown memes 
Whumpy rambling coming straight from my delirious brain
My own sub-par short stories, ficlits, and maybe even an eventual series or two
My own mediocre art (eventually)
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Whump I fuck with (like a said, pretty much all of it!):
All gender & POC whump (including lady whump, lady whumpers, mixed gendered Whumpee & Whumper combos, etc. Errybody getting whumped ‘round here.)
APOCALYPSE
Hurt/comfort
Hurt/no comfort
No hurt/comfort
Physical, emotional, and mental (if there’s all three it’s a magical trifecta of hurt)
Sickfics (I HATE being sick so I get it)
Medical (totally have iatrophobia—I’m a wuss who’s terrified of doctors and hospitals—so once again, I gettt ittt)
Lab (this is like medical, but worse)
Pet (including WRU, BBU, etc.)
Dehumanization
Captivity (short & long term)
Multiple Whumpees, multiple Whumpers
All types of Whumpees, give me stoic, give me angsty, defiant, broken, cursed, conditioned, big, small, ALL OF IT
All types of Whumpers, but especially those creepy and intimate ones that make you want to rip your own skin off (look, I’m here actively seeking out to have a bad time—bad time=good time)
Caretakers in any and all form, my favorites are platonic or found-family caretakers, but if Whumpee just so happens to find their new boo-thang, love that for them just the same.
Recovery and caretaking
Gore and body horror
TORTURE
Chains, restrains, collars, rope—just tie that B down!
Fantasy, sci-fi, paranormal, supernatural, magic
Historical, present, future
Non-human (and human)
Cannibalism
Explicit stuff like non-con, dub-con, forced drugging, etc. I will always add TW’s and tags to my posts containing hardcore stuff and it will be marked ‘mature’!
 
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Whump I refuse to Touch with a 10-foot pole:
Anything explicit with minors
Furries (sorry, I just fucking CAN’T)
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Other Story Stuff & Random Things:
Subject X: BB217 Intro
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cupoftaae · 11 months
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Forever And A Day (KTH x READER) series ♡ sunrise in versailles (part 1) (chapter 13)
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Summary: your lifelong friend is forced to face his true feelings for you once he breaks the number one rule of becoming friends with benefits: dont fall in love. He knows he loves you, but you on the other hand need more convincing of the most important thing: the right decision.
Genre: fwb. Roommates, friends to idiots to lovers, fluff, angst, smut, the whole 9 yards tbh.
Pairing: taehyung x female!reader
rating: 18+ (minors dni!!!)
word count- 6k ish
warnings- swearing, angst, some kissing, theres an argument whoops. mentions of pregnancy. fluff.
a/n- Hey m'loves, sorry for the late chapter, I hope you enjoy!!! (excuse any typos, have not spell checked!!!)
"what...?"
You tried your best to offer a small smile at the camera, taehyungs parents looked back at you through the screen with confused and angered faces.
"we are gonna have a baby" taehyung declared again, his hand coming down and out of frame to grasp yours, giving a reassuring squeeze.
Taehyungs mother looked more than upset, devastated was more the correct and fit term, while his father just seemed disappointed.
"You told us you werent together" she spoke up, her hand over her mouth as she exchanged glances with her husband.
"funny how things happen, huh?" tae chuckled nervously, this time you squeezed his hand.
"are you sure you are the father?" his dad added, making your chest pang with pain at the accusation that you were the type to sleep around so carelessly.
"You dont need to cover for her" his mom spoke
"I know he is the father, im not stupid, thank you. How dare you ask that?" you spit, feeling guilty at your outburst, but mad at his parents for even going there. "look..it wasnt our plan. Some things....occurred...and we cant change them, all we wanted to do was tell you guys and its up to you to support us or not, either way...its happening, and im sorry if you dont like it" you mumble, taehyung softly nodding and smiling, proud of you sticking up for yourself.
Taehyungs mother simply scoffed, her hand wiping her tear that had fallen.
wow. she really wasnt happy about this, about you.
"we taught you better than this, and y/n I know your mom taught you better too....you know how things are supposed to be done. You get your career started, you marry, then children." his father cleared his throat
"we dont need to do things in order, you know" taehyung spoke against his dads words, "we have a plan...I think we will be alright"
You smile at your boyfriend, hand rubbing his back. "Yeah...." you whisper, "and besides...my parents had me before marriage, they were younger than taehyung and I when they got pregnant" you try to point out.
His mom glares down at you through the laptop screen, "yeah and how did that work out for them? wheres your dad now? hm? exactly."
Your face falls at her words, you didnt even have anything to argue back, a sick feeling falling over you.
"mom..." taehyung warns, his eyes darting to make sure you were ok.
"why would you bring up such a thing?" you whisper
She shrugged, "because its life, and things dont always go as planned. I wanted my son to be an established business man by now but no, you've tied him down to the ground again."
You watched, feeling numb, as she spoke more
"we had a feeling you two would end up together, but not like this...no no...not like this"
With that, you looked at taehyung before looking back at the screen.
"I think we are done here" you were quick to hit the disconnect call button on your laptop, standing up immediately as you ran upstairs.
"y/n!" taehyung closed the computer, standing up to follow you.
Once you were inside your bedroom, you wrapped your arms around your stomach, pacing the carpet. Taehyung abruptly walked in "baby..."
"why would she say that to me? why would she go there?" you cry softly, questioning how his own mother could be so cruel.
"I am so sorry my love" he is quick to wrap you in his arms.
Your hands held him tightly as you tried to calm your breathing.
"im terrified to tell my mom now" you whisper
"something tells me she will be a little kinder..." taehyung chuckled softly.
You moved to sit on the bed, suddenly feeling uncomfortable given you were still in your work outfit from this morning. You were a bit stressed at all the sudden life changes, and the least you wanted was some compassion. You will never understand how such cruel people could birth and raise someone as loving as taehyung.
"Im sorry" you lay back, eyes on the ceiling.
"for..?" he climbed next to you, laying on his side as his hand crawled up to your stomach.
"all of this mess...your parents..."
"baby thats not your fault...screw their opinion...I have my girl, and if its just you and me in the end, im alright with that. you know why?" he mumbled softly
"why?"
"because we've already made it this far, look at how good we are doing, hm? I love you, and im proud of you....please dont listen to my mother or father, their words mean nothing. Focus on us, on you and me okay?"
You gently nod, holding his hand as he kissed your cheek. You both laid in the comforting silence of the room for a bit, before taehyungs voice brought you out of your trance. "lets take a bath"
-
The next morning you were up and at work early, checking attendance for the young children at the daycare center.
You and taehyung both agreed to hold off on disclosing the information with your mom for a few days until it felt right to do so, however part of you wanted it over with. You were about 3 months along, and it felt like things were passing quickly.
"Daniel?" you called out gently, looking around the room to find the small hand raising up to your attention.
You checked off his name before finishing the list, handing it to the main teacher.
The children were adorable, there wasn't many, only 8....5 girls and 3 boys. Though its only been a few days of work, most have warmed up to you just fine. One even trusted you to watch over their stuffed animal during recess time (thats a big responsibility)
The group was mainly produced to watch over little kids who's parents worked all day, which, you hate to admit, but made you feel a bit sad.
Children need full time attention and care, and you questioned if you would ever hand your child away to some strangers for hours, days, weeks at a time. It was crazy now that you had this wild perspective.
During your lunch break, you sat down in one of the empty classes to facetime taehyung, who answered after a few rings.
"hello?" his groggy voice came through, the screen showing the ceiling.
"aw sleepyhead, did I wake you from your nap?" you giggled, speaking sarcastically as you watched for his face.
"mm" he finally looked over his phone, a soft smile apparent, "hi baby...hows work?"
"its good actually....im not as nauseous as I was when I woke up, thank God"
"thats good."
you nod, smiling as you bit into your protein bar as you slowly sunk into your desk chair more. "how are you?"
"im good" he smiled, "I fixed the drain"
"woo!" you giggled
"I know..." taehyung yawned, rolling over and out of bed. "It doesnt make that weird noise anymore, see?" he pointed the camera down to the sink, the water flushing through normally
"good job, thank you" you smiled at your phone
"Oh and also...um, my mom called me again after you left."
"oh....?"
"yeah, I think me explaining things sort of helped her, she still isnt happy but she takes back her comment."
You sigh, "well im still upset about it"
"and you have every right to be, im just saying....she knows she was wrong"
You nod, crumpling the wrapper in your hand.
"and of course, I told her that we haven't told your mom yet, so no contact. She promised she wouldn't say anything" he mumbled
"well...thats good" you smile blankly, "maybe we should tell her tonight? I dont know..." you sigh "im so nervous"
Taehyung looks back to the phone, offering you a sympathetic smile. "angel...I know its scary but we cant not tell her...we need any support we can get"
"i know" you nod, defeated as you look at the clock. "okay honey...I gotta go, ill be home at 3, okay?"
"okay baby, love you" he smiles gently, waving goodbye before disconnecting the call.
You sigh, putting your phone into your jean pocket as you make your way back into the classroom.
"Ah, Kenji is feeling a little bit under the weather right now, I am going to direct you to sit with him for a bit while I begin the next activity?" the main teacher came up behind you, pointing you in the direction of a young boy sitting at an empty table in the back, his hidden face in his arms.
"is he feeling ill?" you question, sympathetically eying the small boy
"no..." she shook her head, whispering, "he told me his parents had been fighting all morning"
your heart pangs deeply in your chest, the surge of the feelings you felt at your own parents fighting resurfacing, you knew what it felt like to have drama at home and then be forced to go to school or work and act like nothing happened, despite being upset.
You nodded sadly and quietly made your way to the back of the room, pulling the stool out from beside him and sitting. "Kenji, you alright bud? whats going on?" you gently rub his back, trying to get him to lift his head up.
"mm..im okay" the tiny voice squeaked
"you know...its okay if you arent" you whispered, leaning your head into your palm. "do you wanna talk about whats going on? you dont have to, but sometimes it feels better to let it out, especially if you dont always get the chance to." you try to course him along, not wanting to pry but rather wanting to provide relief.
With this, Kenji slowly lifted his head, cheeks red in embarrassment as slight tears watered his eyes. "I dont wanna talk" he said apologetically
You frowned for a moment before composing your teacher-like empathy, "thats okay, but is it alright if I sit here with you?"
He nodded, putting his head back down as he leaned closer to you, the only thing you could possibly do was rub his back for a bit longer before grabbing the nearby crayons and paper.
"you wanna draw?"
He nodded, silently as his chubby hand grabbed a crayon. "'dont know what to draw"
You giggled, "well....do you have any pets?"
He nodded enthusiastically, almost as if the mention of his pet was able to pull him out of his behavior.
"really?" you smiled widely "what kind of pet do you have?"
He grinned, his smile missing many teeth, "I have a cat! her name is chibi!"
You laughed, "chibi, small in japanese, is chibi really tiny?"
"yes, she this big" he reaches his hands out to show you the exact measurements.
"wow! that is tiny, you should draw her for me, i'll hang it up on my fridge at my house" you giggle
"really??" he widened his eyes, grabbing the paper as he furiously began to draw, you were happy to take his mind off whatever home troubles were burdening him.
He, at least for that moment, completely forgot about his sulking, and the way he drew quickly told you that.
"I have a pet fish, yknow" you smile, watching him draw.
"ooo!!"
"mhm, his name is Hae" you nod, "hes a tiny yellow fish"
"hae is a funny name" he blurts, smiling as you show him a photo of your pet.
"its Korean for sun, like in the sky" you add, knowing that Kenji isnt super familiar with the Korean language. "My boyfriend bought him one day and now he has this huge tank, we even put a little spongebob figure in there. Do you like spongebob?"
He giggled, "yeah, maybe hae and Chibi can be friends"
you grin, "Oh that would be lovely huh?"
He held up his picture before immediately putting it down "wait!" he grabbed the yellow crayon and began to add a small touch to the corner of the page, turning it around and waiting for your approval.
"did you draw hae and chibi?" you spoke, your hands holding his smaller one.
"mhm!!"
"oh my! this is beautiful Kenji, thank you bubs! i'll make sure to show this to Hae so he knows his new best friend"
Kenji beamed in confidence, writing his name on the page before gifting it to you.
"thank you!" you spoke, kenji gently hugging you before the main teacher made her way over.
"hows everyone?" she cheered, glancing at you
"we're good, right kenji?"
He happily nodded
"your daddy is here to pick you up, but make sure you hold Miss.Y/n's hand out to the front okay?"
You gently take kenji and make your way down the stairs to the parent pick up spot, you kneel down. "do you see your daddy?"
The smaller boy eagerly looks around, scanning the tall adults for the familiar face, "oh hes here!!" he jumps up and down, dragging you over to the man standing against the wall on his phone.
"daddy!!!" Kenji runs and clings to his fathers leg, his dad laughing and picking him up. "this is Miss.Y/N!!"
the fathers eyes drag up to you, offering a greeting smile. "hello" he bowed his head politely, "Min Yoongi" His hand reached out for yours
You shook it, smiling back "nice to meet you, Kenji had a fun day, make sure he tells you all about it"
He chuckled softly, his arms squeezing the small boy in his hold. "oh yeah?"
Kenji nodded, "I told her about Chibi"
"oh yeah, chibi, our fat cat" Yoongi teased
"shes tiny!!"
"not anymore"
You couldnt help but giggle at the adorable interaction, "well make sure you say hi to her for me, yeah?"
Kenji nodded, standing to his feet as he took his dads hands. "well i'll be seeing you around then" yoongi grinned, watching you say your goodbyes to Kenji
"yep, i'll be here tomorrow" you giggled, waving the two off before helping attend to a few other students.
Min Yoongi couldnt help but notice how gentle you were with his son, it made his heart happy that he could be at a safe place during the day instead of having to witness the downfall of him and his mothers marriage.
He also took in your appearance, noting how beautiful you were, but the thoughts quickly disappeared as his son begging to leave for ice cream.
-
You texted Taehyung as you left work, your feet dragging you down the street as you avoided bumping into others
Me: taetae im free...want me to pick you up coffee? (3:06pm)
Tae<3: yes, thanjs my love (3:07pm)
You giggled at his typo as you looked up, turning your direction in the way of the store before you felt a hand on your back, gently asking for your attention
"um..hello?" you took your headphones off as you turned, your eyes widening as you took in the appearance of the man you haven't seen in quite some time.
"Y/n..." he looked upset, rough, and like he had not been taking care of himself, not that he ever really did anyways.
"kaito?" you scoffed, looking around as if this was some joke
"please, im sorry, I dont mean to interrupt you and I know i'm the last person you want to see right now but I just ...I need to talk with you" he exhaled, hands defenseless as they fell openly to his sides, his venerability at show.
Your eyes glared over him before you took a breath, deciding that the risk factor here was low.
"what?"
He swallowed, looking down at you sadly. "are you pregnant?"
Your breath caught in your throat.
Yup. he knows.
Trying to figure out what to respond was hard, the pause and lack of defense was probably enough to answer his question. "I...."
"I saw...taehyung..." he said his name as if it was venom, hard to pronounce, "a-and I know you guys are kinda...whatever. I just want to know....are you? is it...is it mine?"
Throughout everything that has been clouding your mind, you haven't had a moment to sit down and realize the possibility that the child could realistically be either Taehyung or Kaito's.
You rarely were intimate with your ex, but the slight chance was still there, and the fact you never realized it until now only adds another problem onto your already spilling over plate.
He took in your panicked state, speaking up "if it is, im....not mad, I just want to know. I know you hate me and you deserve to, but-"
"yeah"
"yeah what?"
"I am...pregnant" you whisper, "please dont tell anyone?"
his eyes fell low, his expression turning soft. You aren't used to seeing Kaito like this, his kind side..
"Its Taehyung's" you gulp out, because hell, even if it is Kaitos, in no way would you want him back in your life. Not after what he said, what he did. He could swear up and down that he's changed but it wont matter to your opinion or baby, at the end of the day, taehyung would be the father....biological or not.
With a sigh, he covered his face "im not gonna tell anyone....I just...I miss you, and I wish that I was the one with you during this and-"
"you dont deserve to be the one, Kaito." you spit, growing uncomfortable. "annie, chae and dahyun all abandon me over your words, over your actions...I was the one who was painted out to be the bad guy...and not once did you come to my defense!"
He nodded sadly "I know...I know"
"you fucking blame taehyung but hes been the only one there for me through it all, hes the only one I have!" you choke out, turning around in frustration "fuck...the nerve you have to do this to me right now"
"are you sure its Taehyung's?" he whispered, not in a rude way, more so in a last attempt to get you to talk with him
"stop with that!"
"If its mine I want to be there, I want to help out, even if you hate me, y/n" his face read regret and desperation
"as if I would ever let you close to me or my family again...the audacity you have is beyond anything ive ever seen....its never gonna happen, you treated me like shit over and over again, nothing will change, Kaito, and ive moved on. You need to as well...." you spoke before brushing past him
Kaito looked up at the sky with dreadful eyes, not able to watch you walk away from him again. He regretted his actions everyday, and just wanted 5 minutes to explain exactly what has been going on during the past few weeks. He wanted to explain that it was all Annie, that she was the one who spread rumors, she was the one who turned your friends against you, he wanted so badly to sit and apologize for anything hes ever done, and tell you that hes trying to change for real this time....but now the only thing he can do is store his thoughts away, as you leave again.
-
"I think we just need to say fuck it and go to Paris"
Taehyung looked away from his hands as he hung up new curtains you bought, the ladder he stood on shaking as he turned to you. "hm?"
"I think we should just go, I really need to get out of Busan"
He smiled gently, eyes returning to his task "I thought we agreed to go in a few weeks, that way you can visit your mom after words during vacation time"
"we should go now, I dont really care anymore"
He frowned a bit at your tone, "whats the urgency, baby? everything okay?" he stepped down the ladder.
You swallowed, "everything is fine, I just need a vacation, and I think its good to just...go"
He nodded slowly, trying not to pry into your sudden desire to leave, "okay...um, we can do that. I'll call them..." he smiled, "what about your mom? thought you wanted to tell-"
"it can wait"
"are you sure youre okay Y/N?"
you sigh, laying into his chest as you hug him, "I just want to be away and alone with you, stressed." you mumble, deciding against getting into the whole kaito thing, knowing he would blow it out of proportion.
Taehyung rubbed your back "ahh...okay....well how do you feel if I move the trip to Monday?"
"i'll let work know"
-
"here"
Taehyung handed you a cold cloth that he had dampened in the airplane bathroom, allowing you to put it on your neck.
Given that there has been time between your last airplane experience to now, you were more prepared on what to do when you felt sick.
"thank you" you mumbled, closing your eyes "how much longer?"
"6 hours baby" Taehyung spoke sadly, looking back at you, your face was pale and clammy.
"mm...damnit"
"I know but just sleep, i'll be here, okay? breath through it" his gentle smile brought you to feel even a little safer.
The flight was long, and bothersome. When you werent on the verge of puking, you tried to sleep, but the seat was too uncomfortable so you tried to lean up against Taehyung, who was moving too much, so you decided to just lay back and count the minutes until this hell ride was over.
The only safe thought was that soon you and taehyung would be alone, entirely, in Paris. The most romantic place...pretty much ever.
You did your best to ignore the whiney nagging voice in the back of your head reminding you about what Kaito said, and how the baby could possibly be his. You wanted to discuss with your boyfriend, which would have been the right thing to do of course, but the way Taehyungs eyes light up when you talk or even slightly mention the pregnancy in anyway, makes you feel like a knife was throw directly into your heart. You cant break him, its okay to lie in some instances, right?
Besides, you were 99.9% positive it was taehyung's anyway, considering there was only a few times you and Kaito ever did it, and only once without secure protection. Chances here are, youre worrying about nothing.
This trip will be nothing but relaxing, a week away from all the shit in both of your lives.
The last time you and Taehyung went to Paris was a few summers ago, it was before the whole friends with benefits and emotionally constipated feelings arose, so this time around will be like an incredibly new experience.
Once the plane ride did finally come to a stop, Taehyung helped gather your luggage as you made your way to the center of the airport arrival gate.
"The taxi guy told me he would pick us up around 6:25pm, we have a few minutes, lets grab something to eat....you didnt eat on the plane"
You smiled, pulling your bag behind you, "because the food was gross, and I felt awful"
"are you feeling better now?"
"a little...I just need to sit and drink water"
He made sure to allow you time to relax as you felt your nausea slip away
Once you both got in the taxi, you eagerly looked out the window to admire the beautiful city that is Paris, the way everyone dressed, the beautiful agriculture, Busan had its perks...but Paris was such a different experience.
"im glad we're here" taehyung whispered, kissing your shoulder as he reached for your hand
"me too" you grinned softly, leaning forward to press a quick kiss to his lips "thank you for taking me"
"I wouldn't know who else to take, your my only one." he whispered, squeezing your hand
It was late in the evening, but the sun was just starting to set once you both arrived to your hotel
"oh this is beautiful" you spoke as you stood out of the car, admiring how fancy everything seemed.
"wait until you walk in"
your boyfriend assisted you with getting the bags out, putting them on a small wheeler as you began to lead inside the building.
A cool breeze hit you once you entered the lobby, an overwhelming aroma of cleanliness and bakery foods filled you, making you turn to taehyung "wow..."
"yeah...." he smiled, eyes looking everywhere, "lets check in, I wanna see our room"
-
The room that was arranged origanally just for Taehyung, included a king sized bed, a large flat screen tv, a mini fridge, and.....a terrace with chairs.
"this is so fucking cool!!" you giggled, running around the spacious area before collapsing on the bed
"this is so exciting, look!!" he ran to the terrace, admiring the view of the now dark city, lights shining everywhere.
You had gotten up to follow, a smile creeping onto your face as you hugged him from behind. "I love you"
He turned his body to face you, arms grabbing your waist before pressing a delicate kiss to your lips "I love you" his forehead was pressed to yours as he gently swayed, the music from the cafe below was loud enough to hear from outside, adding to such a perfect moment.
"this is gonna be a fun trip"
"I agree....lets just not worry about anything, just you and me" you whisper, hands cupping his face
"just you and me, thats easy" Taehyung chuckled, spinning you around before teasingly dipping you over, kissing you again
"how romantic" you giggled, holding onto him
"mhm I try" he led you back into the room "we can unpack in the morning while we have breakfast, I plan to go museum searching tomorrow anyways"
"that sounds fun...let me at least unpack an outfit so I know what to wear" you ran to your suitcase, eyeing some dresses and taking them out as taehyung laid on the giant bed, eyes looking at the french tv guide.
You held a fluffy white dress up to you in the mirror, tilting your head as you decided if it was a good choice or not. Taehyung looked over and smiled, "thats cute, baby"
"is it?" you look over, "I tried it on before we left....its okay, its kinda tight around my stomach and you can kinda see the bump at this point."
Taehyung stood to stand behind you, arms hugging you as you shared a gaze in the mirror. "my beautiful girl" his lips reached your neck "why wouldnt you want to show it off? youre sexy" he teased, gently squeezing your butt as you sighed
"ahh! stop" you jokingly scolded, folding the dress "I guess i'll wear it...its supposed to be really hot tomorrow" you tossed the clothing down on top of your suite case as you turned to look at your boyfriend "what are you doing?"
He scrolled through his phone, tapping something before a gentle jazzed tune emitted throughout the room, you raised an eyebrow as he set the device down.
"dance with me"
"no" you giggled, turning as his arm gently grabbed yours
"please, baby, just for a little" he smiled, voice low and quiet as you fell against his chest. "you look so beautiful...wanna enjoy every moment I have with you"
You blush, closing your eyes as he sways a bit to the music "i look dirty...I am dirty, we just had a 12 hour flight"
"you're always beautiful, and we can take a shower after this"
"so you admit it, I stink" you giggle
He sighed, pulling away to look you in the eye "no, im just saying we can clean up after, stop questioning everything and just let me love you right now and always" he smirked
"mmkay...." you smiled, hiding your face before swaying again
The room was dim, and you had to admit, you were more at peace in this moment than you had been in the past month.
"love you...so much" his hands grazed your back as he spoke against the top of your head.
"Love you more" you whispered, tightening your grip on him.
For a split second you felt guilt, guilt because you forgot that you were pregnant, and it wasnt just the two of you...and you will never have time like this alone again...and somewhere deep down you feel sad about that.
As if he knows your mind is wandering, he leads you to the bed and sits down, pulling you to his lap. "do you wanna sleep before we order dinner?" he asked, hands combing through your hair
"yeah.."
he pulled you down to lay on his chest, between his legs. The rather loud sound of his heartbeat allowed you to melt into his touch.
You couldn't help but imagine as you closed your eyes, that is was just you and taehyung....and you had done things the right way....just you, and your boyfriend together on a trip.
The thought was rude, and selfish, but it didnt stop you from thinking it.
Life would change, and you knew you needed to start taking advantage of these moments now, before youre mom and hes dad.
right now?
you're Y/N and Taehyung.
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