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#but i know for a lot of people its kind of gutting and im not unysmpathetic to that
nyankoizumi · 1 year
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how it feels to chew five stickmen.                           stimulate your senses
#avm#read this if you dare#this doesnt even come CLOSE to explaining everything goin on inside my head#but i guess i can note some stuff#firstly blue is such a little hater because he REALLY isnt cool with people who have hurt his friends#its like they get all older brother about it so thats why they still hate mango's guts#two a lot of the color gang consider red as a younger brother/just a sibling#and three the romantic relationships; purple might've sorta developed a crush on green but he doesnt know that#so he thinks of them as a friend and they dont wanna mess things up so to the friendzone they go#next endie and red have a thing for each other but endie is so dense about it and they dont see each other enough to go anywhere#so they stay friends for now but the others all know endie has a massive crush on red#and lastly vic has given mango the tittle of hot guy i wont shut up about except he doesnt know them so its a bit weird and parasocial#you know the drill#and all of these. arent fully canon in my mind it depends#im not one to genuinely believe in ships in canon unless stated otherwise by the media#maybe purple is the exception cus i see him doing that thing where someone your age shows you a pixel of kindness and you're head over heels#animation vs Minecraft#i actually reccomend doing this even if its not understandable too#its fun to think about#OH and green has a complicated relationship with mango because he isnt sure he's good for purple yet he has to prove himself#but he wont tell him that#on the other hand mango respects him as purple's friend#im not tagging all of these#avm ships#i guess
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misspickman · 4 months
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cassierose for the ship ask game !!
Ship It
What made you ship it? i liked them in tt03, which you know, is truly a feat considering how terribly that comic treats both of them. but their dynamic (angry homoeroticism) managed to be compelling still
What are your favorite things about the ship? i enjoy girl antagonism from time to time. i know were all sick of the trope that teen girls all hate each others guts but considering cassie has a pretty good relationship with all the other girls on her team(s) its fun to see her just go ugh i hate this one. this one can go. theyre just fun and bitchy and i think they should hatefuck about it. but beside that theres also so much potential there ! i think you know, if anyone writing that comic actually cared about cassie or rose or about their character development, it would have been interesting to see their relationship change over time instead of getting one issue where cassie implicitly calls rose family while protecting her, and then the next one she immediately she calls her a manipulative psychopath for no good reason bc they cant figure out how to make the team interesting without having some wildly antagonistic relationship that doesnt make sense if u think about it for a few seconds. theyre never going to be besties but it would have been nice to see them go from blind hate to an uneasy truce; they dont like each other but they do, unfortunately, care about each other, and lets see where we go from that. + itd be interesting to dig into cassies hypocrisy when it comes to hating rose
Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? i guess its that i would like them to grow past mindlessly despising each other ? this is not me criticizing anyone but i feel like a lot of takes on cassierose ive seen are that they should stay in the hatefucking no mushy business❌❌❌phase which is definitely fair and true to how they are in tt03. but i do have some issues with the way they were written in tt03 (particularly cassie) and would like to see their dynamic progress from that (see rant above)
#i guess the reason im personally more interested in them sort of working through it is bc cassie doesnt have. a good reason for hating rose#i dont think its ooc but a lot of it Is supposed to be bc shes either jealous of her bc of tim (??)or thinks rose sucks bc she killed peopl#which is. she was drugged and manipulated and i think most teen titans in the superhero business should be able to handle#that sort of a not black and white situation#and idk. be more understanding. i know rose isnt super nice but maybe calling her a manipulative bitch constantly isnt the way to go#theres fun antagonism and theres cassie being just needlessly awful to her (that convo she and tim have about rose)#and i do think theyll always be bitchy to each other but i would like to imagine cassie is more considerate than this#and would eventually recognize she was occasionally just being shitty ! it would make for an interesting story ! alas#i think cassierose going from hating each others guts as teens to adult coworkers who dont really hate each other anymore#bc theyve been through so much shit together#but need to keep up the appearances of hating each other bc god forbid they admit to being kind of friends. that would be fun. to me<3#ask#thank you. so sorry this got so long#youve given me an excuse to rant about cassierose so this is what u get<3#sorry that the question was what i like about the ship and i just bitched about how it could be better#i guess the answer is im intrigued by the potential. also i love lesbians
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omegalomania · 2 years
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hi!! just saw your post abt brendon and all the shit p!atd has covered up and i honestly feel so sick :// i have a question tho bc as much as i hate them now and wanna distance from them, i genuinely love some of their music but also i cant listen to it w/o being sick but i wanna enjoy the music solely yknow? dyou know how i could do that lol bc im gonna be sad if i can never listen to their songs the same way again
i cant say im an expert on any of this and it's hard because im of two minds. on one hand, yes, i love the idea of death of the author and reclaiming a work from a shitty person. on the other hand...i dont like the idea of continuing to validate that shitty persons work and maintain that persons relevance in the public eye, especially if it means that they get to coast off of that relevance and dodge consequences for their shit actions!
what muddies the issues so much with panic is that despite how much the marketing has pushed this idea...panic really isn't and never has been solely the brendon urie show. the band was started between two childhood friends (ryan ross and spencer smith). the band managed to exist because the original bassist, brent wilson, happened to know brendon urie and thought he could sing. the band got a record deal because ryan ross bothered pete wentz on livejournal enough times. panic at the disco got a career because pete wentz decided to take a chance on these kids from vegas and create an entire label to sign them. a fever you can't sweat out exists because of ryan ross and spencer smith as much as it does because of brendon urie. pretty odd exists because of jon walker and ryan ross and spencer smith as much as it does because of brendon urie. vices & virtues exists because of spencer smith and pete wentz and dallon weekes as much as it does because of brendon urie. too weird to live, too rare to die exists because of spencer smith and dallon weekes as much as it does because of brendon urie. death of a bachelor exists because of lolo as much as it does because of brendon urie. pray for the wicked exists because of brendon's 43 writers (yes, really, i counted, it has that many credited lmao) as much as it does because of the guy himself. all these records exist because of the producers and engineers that worked on them just as much as they do because of brendon urie, if not more so.
i don't want to downplay how many other hands have been involved in the machine of panic. brendon is not and never has been its sole engineer, no matter how much he's billed as the central creative mind. and i don't want to erase or dismiss how many other people contributed to that art because the one guy who owns the title now happens to be a garbage person, particularly since brendon didn't start the band to begin with! for however shit he was treated in the band, dallon has stated that he's still proud of a lot of the instrumentation and lyricism he put on too weird, and i want to still recognize a lot of that record as something i can admire.
for my part, i've still got a few panic albums on my ipod. i didn't...actually buy them because i was a broke college student when i got my hands on them lol so i didn't actually ever give the guy my money. and it's hard to listen to them now for the most part. i don't stream panic stuff, i don't give it views. if i listen to the older stuff, i do it on my own time and as isolated from statistics as possible. i don't support brendon voluntarily in any way and the only times i discuss him is to dunk on him mercilessly because he deserves it lol
i wish i had a better answer for you that could give you peace of mind, anon. the sad fact is that it's not a simple issue because the simplest part of the issue - that brendon urie is a sack of shit - is frustrated by the fact that he took ownership of a band that was never really his to begin with, and performs songs that he never actually wrote drawing from situations he never personally lived.
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thewhizzyhead · 9 months
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oki so when i first listened to olivia rodrigo's 'sour' 2 years ago, i was genuinely surprised by how much of the album resonated with me as a 17 year old having gone through similar feelings of hopelessly lost heartbreak and questions of self-worth in its various forms - like it really felt like a coming-of-age album of sorts made to and perhaps for 16-18 year olds and i really did like that! anyways imagine my fucking glee when 'vampire' and 'bad idea right?' released and showed thematically and sonically that "Oh shit this is for a much older audience than last time oh shit this one's for the college gurlies, this new album is for me"
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meiffel-tower · 2 years
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In yet another experience supporting my trust of my gut/intuition, my sister just sent me a picture of the card her husband gave her and I saw that he specifically wrote "you are super special to me" and yesterday I wrote "you're extremely special to me" in my own birthday message to her. Neither of us wrote a huge flowery paragraph, we both did just 2-3 short but genuine sentences. And like one of the things I've always liked about him is that i feel like we both love my sister in similar ways, and anyways yeah this was just a little thing that just validated my belief that we're similar in some ways lol (and my personal theory that I might end up with a guy with a personality/way of loving me similar to my sister's lmao)
I just think it's interesting how we're drawn to certain types of people and you can kind of feel it even before you really know them that well
#i really do believe in a kind of spiritual intuition#ever since i met one of my best friends in college and without even really talking i was like#'for some reason I feel like i could be friends with this girl'#and i was right and we got along really well and i still consider one of my best friends even though we don't talk that much anymore#bc i feel like we just click in a way thats not dependent on talking super frequently#and anyways this is why i really do not like dating apps and am not the best at casual dating#bc i guess im waiting for that feeling of 'i don't know how but i strongly suspect this is right' with a guy#bc ive had it before with friends and jobs and the decision to stay in VA rather try and find a job in GA like i originally planned#this is also why i go nuts for SJMs mate stuff hahahaha i just love it!!#i really do believe theres something more to life and some people peoples souls and spirits just immediately mesh in an unexplainable way#be it platonically or romantically or whatever#personal#txt#and i also know what its like to feel attracted to someone but also know deep deep down in your gut that its not quite right#or like what im looking for#and that time i ignored it because i wanted things to work out and i did love him and care about him a lot#but i got my heart broken in a long drawn out way#so not trying that again lol#i won't settle for less than an intuitive green light about a guy and if that means i never get married then so be it i guess#id rather be happy on my own with my other loved ones than be married to someone i dont believe in my soul with a right decision#as hippie dippy as that sounds lmao
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victorianbatman · 2 months
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More ATLA/LOK Incorrect quotes
GN reader, unless stated otherwise
Bolin, propping his feet on the table: So, I heard you like bad boys?
Y/n: What? No.
Bolin, taking his feet off the table: Oh thank God, that felt terrible.
-
Lin: Whats this?
Y/n, hugging her: Affection.
Lin: Disgusting.
Lin:…
Lin: Do it again.
-
Bolin: Wow, your legs look amazing in those pants!
Y/n: You should see me without them.
Bolin: Without.. legs?
-
Sokka: What did you make for Y/n?
Zuko, staring at the burnt food: Regret.
-
Korra, holding kettle: Coffee or tea?
Y/n: Tea.
Korra: Wrong! Its coffee.
-
Bolin, talking about y/n: My crush isn’t picking up on any of my hints.
Mako: What hints have you given them?
Bolin: I think about them.. a lot.
Bolin: And sometimes I think about talking to them.
-
Y/n: Mako?
Mako: What?
Y/n: Are you asleep?
Mako: Who the fuck did you think said ‘what’?
-
Y/n, waking up: Am I dead?
[Sees Asami next to them]
Y/n: Is this heaven?
Korra, bangs on door: Open up, fuckers its me Korra
Y/n, tearing up: I always knew I’d end up in hell.
-
Lin: Having trouble figuring out who knows Korra the best?
Asami: Its me!
Bolin: Its me!
Mako: Its me!
Y/n:..
Y/n: It’s probably not me.
-
Y/n: Time for plan G.
Mako: Wait- don’t you mean plan B?
Y/n: No we did plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over C because of some technical difficulties.
Asami: What about plan D?
Y/n: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.
Bolin: And plan E?
Y/n: Im hoping not to use it, I die in plan E.
Korra: I like plan E.
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Y/n: What the fuck? People actually tell their crushes they like them?
Mako: Well, what do you do?
Y/n: I die? Pfft- What kinda question..
-
Y/n: A mosquito tried to bite me and I slapped it and it died.
Y/n: Then I started thinking. It was just trying to get food.
Y/n: Like, what if I went to the fridge to get something to eat and it slammed the door on me and broke my neck?
Y/n: Howw would I feel?
Mako: Are you ok?
-
Bolin: What does ‘take out’ mean?
Mako: Food.
Asami: Dating.
Korra: Murder.
Y/n: IT COULD MEAN ALL THREE IF YOURE NOT A FUCKING COWARD!
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Korra: You’re a little obsessed with yourself aren’t you?
Y/n: Well if im not who else is gonna be?
-
[Y/n, throws bread at turtleducks]
Y/n: Do not forget this act of altruism. If I am ever in trouble, I expect you and your brethren to come to my aid. Do not forget.
-
Y/n: You’re the love of my life, I’d do anything for you.
Asami: I want you to take care of yourself and get enough sleep.
Y/n: Absolutely not.
-
Asami: My boyfriend is too tall to kiss, what should I do?
Korra: Punch him in the gut, then when he leans down kiss him.
Bolin: Tackle him
Y/n: Dump him, be with me.
Lin, passing by: Kick him in the shin.
Mako: Please don’t do any of those.
-
[Korra, sneaks into house at 2 am]
Mako, turns in swivel chair: Care to explain where you were?
Korra: Uhh.. I was out with Y/n.
Y/n, also turns around in another swivel chair: Care to- [chair wont stop turning] Mako- I cant stop the chair-
-
Bolin, after making Y/n mad: You wont hit me, I have witnesses.
Y/n: Mako. Asami. Turn around.
[Both Mako and Asmai turn around]
Bolin, scared: M-Mako? Asami?
-
Y/n: So whats Zukos type?
Sokka: Y/c eyes, kind, oblivious, good sense of humour, turtleduck lover.
Y/n: Damn, sounds kind of like me. Too bad we’re just friends though.
Sokka: Did I mention oblivious?
Y/n: Yeah why?
Sokka: Just making sure.
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beiasluv · 1 year
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ok so i sent a request but im not sure if you got it bc it glitched for me
anywy its like the fic you did wherin reader and neteyam are twins and stuff and reader likes aonung and aonung likes her and stuff, and the main thing of the fic is that jake and neteyam (mostly jake) are protective of her like the "no boys until i die!" shi yk
anyway love your work xx
protective sullys
a/n: PLEASE, GUYS WE NEED JAKE’S DAD GIRL ERA PERIODT / i feel something’s not right in this fic, but i hope you guys still enjoy it 🤍
masterlist
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the day your family arrived at the metkayina clan was one of the most beautiful and hideous days in the history
you guys were met with judging eyes and snickers from the people, while some gave reassuring smiles. you don’t know who to trust or where to go, but you hoped for the best and put on a fake smile to calm your siblings down.
but, neteyam being neteyam, he knows you too well. he sensed a feeling of uneasiness in your gut and he can feel it too. i mean, what do they say about twins?
while tuk held on to neytiri and jake, neteyam wrapped his arm around your shoulder, rubbing gently along your marks, and whispering comforting words.
“it’s goin’ to be alright, y/n…, i know we can do it, sully sticks together, huh?” he was met with your snicker to his joke.
but…one particular eye caught your attention. the bluest and tender teal eyes amongst the crowd stared into your soul. you felt your legs trembling under his gaze, yet you stood tall. neteyam noticing him as well made an unwelcoming face toward the intruder’s view
“well, our daughter, tsireya, and son, ao’nung, will show you the way of our lives. treat them with respect and be kind to them, for they are like babies taking their first step,”
‘so…‘ao’nung’…huh?’
settling down in your marui wasn’t as easy as it was back home. the floors are bouncy, which tuk liked A LOT, and there is little to no privacy at all. you miss the pandora plants and leaves that provided shade and coverage.
anyways, life was starting to look better.
until someone had to ruin it again…that familiar eyes you know so well, yet to little. he was staring at you again.
the very first practice session your siblings and you received much unnecessary embarrassment from the metkayina’s teens
well, it would be fair to say that you received them the least. ao’nung is always coughing or changing the subject
“well, you know, freak, if you don’t have those five little fingers then-“
“ahem, where were we? oh, right, let’s go to the reefs over there, numnuts,” ao’nung pointed towards the sea with his real fingers. “last person’s a raw egg.”
without another word, he swam off into the sea. and unknowingly to you, a grownup teenager, you still fell for the stupid game every time. seeing your siblings beating you to dive into the ocean, you followed in quickly.
but it seemed like your attempts had been in vain. bubbles leaving your mouth, covering your views of the world around you. like heaven sent, his -yes you knew this color- teal marked hand clutched your body from drowning into the ocean floor, dragging you up to the surface.
“are you alright? i am sorry, so sorry,” he clutched your face in his arm. “are you hurt?” he grabbed hurriedly along your body checking for injuries.
“i- i am fine, no worries, thank you,” you smiled sheepishly.
“now, hold my shoulders, okay?” he guided you behind his back. “breath in…we’re going down,” you breathed your last air and your body was submerged underneath again.
while at the coral reef, he took an extra effort to stay close to you. neteyam caught on what was going on and he wasn’t happy about you being close to that teal freak. lo’ak definitely gave a side eye on ao’nung.
that simple act of kindness melted your heart by a little, even if you didn’t want to accept it.
to say that when jake heard the news of your possible death, he wasn’t the most friendly towards ao’nung. tonowari wasn’t the most glad either. (dads being homies vibe)
plus, the fight they had on the beach didn’t help the situation get any better.
“please! guys! stop!” you shouted as you ran up from the ocean, finding yourself with the sight of a tumbling ball of blue na’vis
your sight caught the eyes of one particular metkayina and a gulp in his throat. looking at your fresh of the water and hair sticking to your body he managed to croaked out, “hey…y- y/n.”
“neteyam! lo’ak! c’mon!” you insisted. without a second thought, you dragged them by their ears and kicked off a metkayina attacking their tails. “please, show us some respect and we’ll reciprocate them, sorry for them.”
you flicked your head back and turned away from them, making your way towards your marui. that sight caught one metkayina to get lost in his mind and a drool slipped down his lips. ‘man, he messed up real bad.’
but in the mist of the mess, the heart of the storm, was just a lover boy trying his best to retrieve his chance
jake and neteyam turned on their ultimate protective mode 110%
“never bother my sister, ever AGAIN. you hear that?” neteyam hissed against ao’nung’s face, adding extra effort to spat a saliva against his teal face.
jake would be so protective of you 😭
he would always remind you every morning like: “no boys until i die, understand?”
hugs you all the timeeee. when walking around the village, wrapping a hand around your shoulder is a must for him.
protecting you from the eyes of the boys is his first priority. (cuz, obviously, he knows what those boys thinks, because he was once like in their place 💀)
jake would always tell you to cover up 😭 (as if na’vi clothes provide any coverage-) but anyways, he’ll say like “wear a shawl over your shoulder, it’s hot outside.”
always asking where are you going and when are you gonna come back.
lying to jake about those stuff are useless, so you did what a good child would do: telling him that you are going to hang out with ao’nung
i am telling you that jake lost his MIND, “WHAT, Y/N, HONEY, NO, WITH HIM? WHY?”
but anyways, our consent king respected his baby’s decision and let you go, BUT was panicking so much.
“okay, honey, what did i tell you?”
“yes, dad, no kissing, no hugging, no mating, come back before sunset, and use the talkie-walkie if he does something weird,” you rolled your eyes. for sure you are not going to mate with some dude on a first date.
“you missed one…”
“no touching, right, dad, what do you expect us to do if we are not allowed to have physical contact, meditate?”
“right, then, meditation sounds nice, doesn’t it?”
“dad!”
neteyam would kill for you without a hesitation. scaring some creepy dudes? easy
he gives out the best bear hug for youuuu
loves to comfort his siblings, especially you
jake is not much of a difference. he is super protective of his kids and you especially. his prized possession and the apple of his eyes.
being his oldest daughter, requires lots of sacrifice but jake’s affection for you is all worth it.
anyways, GOOD LUCK ao’nung, you need that. passing through the death valley with two demons behind your trail is not easy 💀
every time he comes to pick you up, he is sweating like a DAWG
“hello, mr.sully, is erm…y/n here?”
“well, where do you expect her to be? did you made a proper plan? son…, my daughter is not an object you could just pick up whenever you are bored.”
“yes, sir, we agreed to go-“
“ao’nung!” you called as you walked out. “bye, dad, love ya,” a peck on the cheek for jake and you’re off the marui.
“bye, sweetheart,” a smile for you and a death glare for ao’nung, pretty basic.
neytiri to the rescue, guyssss. she definitely have a soft spot for boys, and boys like *ahem* jake ao’nung.
she sees his effort for you and tries to persuade jake into giving in. and jake will be like: “pLEASE, no.”
but changing someone as egotistical as ao’nung to become more humble isn’t the easiest job. every moment, hanging out together, it was as if you rubbed his ego down step by step.
ronal and tonowari were GLAD. “please, y/n, tell us how you do it” 💀
ao’nung became the sweetest boy for you 🥺 *neteyam staring behind*😈
today’s a great day to treat yourself! 🤍
@rosaryos / @bumblinbumblvee / @nyotamalfoy / @fangirl-2610 / @astablacksword / @lokisblueskin
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shigayokagayama · 1 year
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incomplete list of weird/interesting manga-anime discrepancies
-you know the bit where they break into the girls highschool in episode 2? yea thats chapter 56. spliced into the middle of chapter 4. its supposed to go before the bit with the ghost family as a lead up to the mogami arc with mob starting to consider evil spirits as just as much “people” as living humans are. all things considered its kind of weird how well it fits its anime placement
-ritsu in the manga gets introduced in the same chapter as teru. you dont see mobs family at all for the first few chapters. infact i dont think his parents appear until like. chapter 25????? every interaction you see between mob and any of his family is completely made up for the anime
-in the manga during the claw arc instead of reigen sending them away all the lackeys just stood there awkwardly during the fight w the scars fdnjksndkjgnd
-mogami arc got GUTTED my god. the part where the fake psychics tried to murder minori got removed, shinras role in the arc got reduced to basically nothing, they move mogamiland ritsu to a bridge like 50 feet away instead of having him walk right over mob, mob only gets beat up like twice, the cat lives, the boxcutter bit is totally removed, the fight with the spirits is made a lot more abstract and less graphic. like im glad this one took the hit instead of the separation arc bc i cant imagine that arc ever being effective as one episode but wow.
-putting the “mob finding his family dead” thing at the end of the episode instead of in the middle of a chapter where it originally was was an objectively hilarious move
-rip the scene of teru outsmarting all three claw guys and saying “say old man have you ever been tortured before” unfortunately all scenes of teru being competent are not plot relevant and must die. also teru can make shadow clones
-hey remember those weird satellite people in claw keeping the viewer updated on where all the characters were in that infinite arc?
-mob with a gun.
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-mob getting briefly knocked out while fighting toichiro and dimple possessing him then getting kicked out was replaced w toichiro just throwing him out the window or somethhing???
-toichiro saying that he only kept the super five around as spare batteries and draining serizawas power getting cut was a personal affront to me
-every single emotion mob cycled through in the anime got a 100% meter. the kid was super emotionally unstable in that fight
-that old man whos house they went to whos wraith made everyone asleep that they exorcised? yea they anime team made that up. they never went to his house in the manga, he just went to spirits and such for a shoulder massage
-manga reigen got 0 money for helping the yokai dude. it wasnt on the table. also most of the stuff he was saying was lifted from a video game serizawa played which he pointed out. also serizawa thought getting arrested was a type of spell
-takenakas general meanness was significantly toned down manga takenaka was a huge bitch
-in general the alien arc was a lot funnier in the manga? like the scene where reigen crashes they had reached a dead end on an extremely narrow path and were driving in reverse while tome and takenaka were screaming at each other in the back and inukawa was 5 seconds from snapping and killing everyone in the car. these might be my favorite pages in the entire manga they as so fucking funny
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-originally when tome said she wouldnt keep climbing reigen suggested mob carry her with telekinesis (which horrified her) and mob said he was too motion sick to use his powers (obvious lie) but could carry her instead which got her to get up
-mezato asking mob to sign a t shirt for the psycho helmet cult in exchange for relationship advice got cut
-i cry every day that the sequence of ???% waking up didnt get animated it set a very different tone than the anime did. the anime was like. slow build up of dread. the manga was immediately bone deep horror i was literally sitting in my room yelling “WHAT???” over and over again at my computer as i clicked through it
-shigeo and mob conversation cut down significantly, all the references to the body improvement club being mob making a new self rather than embracing who he really is and being scared that all the friends hes made wouldnt like the real him removed </3
-the scene where reigen takes his shoes off is made a lot less somber and depressing. it feels less like “oh he knows hes going to die” and more like. triumphant? in the anime
-100% shigeo kageyama is an anime addition they added specifically to ruin my “the first time we see mob 100% is to fight dimple and the last time is to stop himself from fighting dimple” observation
-anime teru generally seems like hes in a better place than manga teru? manga teru seems very melancholy and like he doesn’t really know what to do with his life or his place in the world (which seems to put shigeo off) but anime teru is like wanna go shopping ^_^ *sips tea happily*
-manga shigeo deliberately threw the cake directly in reigens face and my fury over them making this ambiguous will last until i am dead
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plutonianeris · 1 year
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pick a pile: how you secretly intimidate others ⛓𓌹*♰*𓌺⛓
this is a general reading & for entertainment purposes only, take what resonates and leave what doesn't. scroll through the images & choose based on your inner guidance and gut feeling. ⛓️
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♱☾pile one☽
“don’t call me baby! im not your baby!”
you intimidate others with your individuality. There’s something about you that’s very weird or kind of quirky. not in the “oh im not like other gwurls 🤪” cringey way. but rather you’re kind of blunt even when you don’t mean to be other people might think that what you say is too harsh or direct. This seems to be some thing that might throw off men as well but at the same time it’s also make some desire you. That free spirit can be seen as something that other people want in their life but it’s not always with the best intentions. It’s kind of like they want you to fulfill something for them. Kind of like to conquer you in a way. But it seems like that literally never happens because instead, you’re literally a tower moment for other people in their lives.
Just by being you, you unconsciously force other people to reflect on certain things in their life. you guys people specifically to reflect on their insecurities, and also their childhood. You could find that people, especially women project onto you. they could look at you and mumble under their breath or too each other like “what the fuck is their problem” or talk about how you think you “know it all”
it seems like people are just really intimidated by your knowledge and what you have to share with other people. you might have some Aquarius placements. Whether what you share with others is topics about religion or spirituality or “taboo” subjects, other people could be thrown off by your words, while at the same time secretly want to hear more.
this pile, gave off a lot of scorpio and/or aries and/ or libra & taurus energy and 8th house/ pluto aspects energy. when I asked about qualities people associate with you I got “ regeneration, suspicion, passion, beautiful, art, experimentation, intelligent, creativity, wisdom.” 🕯️
🕸️𓆩♡𓆪🕸️ tip jar 🕸️𓆩♡𓆪🕸️
♱☾pile two☽
“no, I’m killing boys.”
people are secretly intimidated by the way you can rise from the ashes and transform completely after going through super traumatic shit. The way you seem to be able to recover from stuff that can be straight out of someone’s nightmare and manage to come out on top is inspiring but also it makes other people feel insecure. pile two, other people seem to think that you somehow just “get lucky” when something really good happens to you. People might think that you didn’t have to work that hard for it. They could secretly send you evil eye and think oh I wish that would’ve happened to me instead..
shit I’m not gonna lie I feel in awe and a little shook reading these cards describing your energy. you are literally an alchemist. You transform everything you touch and you transform after every experience with a lot of grace and harmony. lmfaoo the quote from “what? like its hard” from legally blonde popped up. The thing is that it actually is hard but you’ve been doing it for so long. There’s no other way for you to really function. You manage to continuously strengthen your spirituality over and over again.
and there’s a certain element of privacy that you also keep when it comes to your home life and the space you live in and also in regards to what you’re even thinking. It kind of leaves people in constant speculation of who you are what you actually do or where you even live. but this privacy seems necessary to you, sacred to you actually. Your personality, ego, and the way you view yourself are in a constant state of fluctuation. But never in a way that ends up being super detrimental to you. even when you “mess up” you learn something and get better.
you are someone that is very strong and I don’t wanna say that like in a corny “omg ur saiuuir strong u went through so much :(“ pity way. I literally mean just a very unique kind of perseverance within your spirit where time after time you just can’t be knocked down. And other people wonder about that, but they’re not even close to being able to dissect it & that intimidates them.
You could be someone that has a lot of 12th house or fourth house placements, as well as Jupiter, Sagittarius, or Pluto prominent in the chart. when I asked about qualities/ words that people associate with you, I got “independent, knowledgeable, transformation, roots, subconscious, potential, hope” 🔐
🕸️𓆩♡𓆪🕸️ tip jar 🕸️𓆩♡𓆪🕸️
♱☾pile three☽
“how do you feel about yourself now stupid motherfucker? you couldve had some pussy.”
people are secretly intimidated by the way you run shit. You have a very straightforward and innovative, and out of the box solution for many of the obstacles you face in life. Similar to pile 2 there is resentment in response to the way you succeed. But when it comes to you it’s more because of the way you do things. people might think “oh it’s not fair that they did it that way and won..” but in reality, you have a unique power being able to bounce back really fast from shit. you don’t mind being someone brand new every single day or changing your habits or routines, or the way you connect with people were your resources very quickly.
In fact, you’re constantly flowing in these spaces of rebirth and attatchment and security. and that intimidate people because they wonder well how is it possible that you’re changing your character and your appearance and your own self all the time and YOU dont care if people label it as a fake or weird. Like I’m not gonna lie this piles giving off someone who has such a range of random aesthetics that ppl r like seeing u as someone who dresses up or is wearing a costume when in reality you just feel transformed by your experiences so frequently.
its giving “im not the person who i was yesterday” so don’t try it today energy. it intimidates people that you’re not ashamed of changing your mind and being like “ well actually I used to like that and now I don’t like it anymore, so can you please respect the boundaries I set up now.”
you TRUST yourself. and not only does that intimidate people but it also makes them MAD. chiron aka trauma, wounds, healing, pain etc popped up, so it doesn’t mean that all your life you had this confidence or ability to listen to yourself and your intuition. If anything you suffered a lot and had a period of time (especially in childhood) were you were taught to not listen to yourself or your intuition. where you were told that if you showed leadership and willpower, and if you used your anger and embraces your anger, that bad things would happen.
But then, finally, you did and you realized that you get so much more from life when you show people how to treat you from the start. And other people want to be able to do that. And you securely inspire them to do that but it’s also a mixture of envy as well thats included in those feelings toward you. oh well. protect your peace! you could be someone that has aries, first house, 8th house and 2nd house placements. 888 also popped up if that has any significance to you. when I asked about qualities/ words that people associate with you, I got “secure, possessive, leader, warrior, loyal.”⚖️
🕸️𓆩♡𓆪🕸️ tip jar 🕸️𓆩♡𓆪🕸️
© plutonianeris 🕷
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mako-neexu · 23 days
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all guda related stuff in mahoyo collab
summoning as a highly complicated magecraft -> highly intact sense of self, magical energy, magical crest, sheer willpower........you who is light and equally dark....
casual comments/banter to the people they trust
guda getting shocked of all things at a talking bird www
gudako -> young girl that likes to jog every morning
gudao -> brat that likes small time candy store sweets
UGH the further emphasis on Servants being familiars that no one - not anyone should just use (exceptional...)
stressing the role of a 'Master'
'I also make mistakes a lot'
"I still don't see what's so special about summoning."
guda screams during summons? lmao kind of reminds me of mash with lord camelot
the way guda just refers to other people as 'that another human' www (i know 'person' is more accurate but to me it sounds like an alien in disguise calling someone as 'fellow human' ww)
Of COURSE guda knows how to stop their own pulse
disbelief. perhaps gut feeling. guda's perception of death to others. (i guess in the face of unnatural they would doubt it. but considering Id chapter, it would depend on the person and how theyre closest to?)
'more like tobimaru' 'more like soujyuurou' getting angry on behalf of someone without letting it show as well... i Understand.
THE TOPIC OF AGING KILLS ME. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU ARE HESITANT????? dont yokuwakaranaina ME????
Don't face world-ending disasters alone
IM CRYING OH MY GOD IM NOT WELL "did you sleep well?" "i slept peacefully because the night was quiet and nice" AUGH GUDAAAAA😭
probably nothing of note but additional descriptor to guda is that they look like a college student as compared to previous descriptions of being 'high school student'.......
not being good at horror stories 🥹 reminds me of summer 5...
(unwell) i forget about guda's tactical prowess sometimes (lies) + guda's mention of the looking glass reminds me of berkercas valentines...
Subtle but gudao's reaction to beating down kashin is 'exhausted or relieved' meanwhile for dako she has the 'doubt' in her dialogue
subtle again but theres a hesitance to guda when asked about what the future looked like. but their second option is saying "eh there arent any flying cars anyways"
ahh okay now i know the crypto stuff guda said. its from gudao. is this MHX's influence lmao. gudao youre advertising crypto seriously? ww
guda casually joking about the times they astral project out of their body likes its nothing and mash is not normal either of course and treats it as regular occurrences. well, its regular but for a normal average person in the 21st century, it certainly isnt ww
GUDA ONCE AGAIN PROVING that despite being 'camera' for us players, they actively hide information and i am not over that fact. (knowing who the culprit is before most of the rest-)
guda not hesitating at ALL to rayshift back to 1999 where the end of the world was supposed to happen www
Ah!! To encourage kinomi in confessing, guda confessed their own out in the open!!!
A bakery with the one they love / A wish to reach the South Pole
You may not be able to have all of your dreams, your nights be peaceful, but I hope that you will still be rewarded at the end of your journey 😭
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jgracie · 2 months
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ELECTRIC TOUCH . . . cabin one headcannons
masterlist | rules
warnings zeus (sorry)
an im gonna be doing these for all the cabins cz i have a lot of ideas in my head LOL but in order of numbers so sorry hecate kids
on the radio electric touch (taylor swift), thunder (imagine dragons), she’s thunderstorms (arctic monkeys), skyfall (adele)
In my head, there are two types of Zeus demigods: lightning and thunder 
‘Lightning’ are the ones with (literally LOL) electrifying personalities, representing the Zeus a lot of their parents probably fell for. They’re fun loving party animals and are down for almost anything. Not to the extent of a Hermes or Dionysus kid, but definitely up there 
‘Thunder’ are quiet and level-headed, showing more of the ‘ruler of the Gods’ side of their father. They have a royal-esque aura to them and carry themselves with confidence and pride. Despite not doing too much to frighten others and mostly keeping to themselves, people still know to stay respectful and that they’re a force to be reckoned with 
The two seem like polar opposites most of the time and have people questioning how the same God could create such different kids, but they actually have a lot in common
The main trait all Zeus kids share is an extreme calling to leadership. Just like how their father saved all his elder siblings from their father’s stomach and became their king, they feel the need to be in charge and make sure everyone’s okay
They are also incredibly good at it. Zeus kids are always the people to go to when you need a pep talk or some words of motivation. Even the ones who perceive themselves as more pessimistic have it in them
A lot of people believe Zeus kids have a minor form of charmspeak because of how good it is, but they don’t
When they’re leading a cause they’re excited about, or if they just have a lot of energy in general, their energy tends to rub off on others like static. Once one person gets it, it's passed along and all of a sudden everyone’s hyped
While their leadership is a good trait to have, it can become obsessive and unhealthy, turning into perfectionism as they want to control every aspect of their life. A severe need for control in all aspects of life is a common fatal flaw for Zeus kids
All of Zeus’ kids could have the ability to fly, but they have to actively try in order for it to happen. If they’re afraid of heights (like Thalia), it just won’t
They can also jump really high. They say it comes naturally, but in reality they just use the air to propel themselves up LOL
The main power associated with Zeus kids is, of course, electrokinesis. They all have it, but it takes them a while to be able to fully control it and harness it to its full potential. They can usually summon lightning no matter the weather conditions, but it tends to be more powerful the more clouds there are in the sky 
Multiple Zeus kids could also create a chain-reaction of sorts with their lightning powers (kind of like that one Pikachu scene in the og Pokemon)
Since metal is a good conductor of electricity, I’m gonna make an assumption and say so are celestial bronze and imperial gold (I know gold is really low on the reactivity series but shh), which means Zeus kids could just wield a weapon of pure lightning if they were in the mood
Some of them have control over clouds/can create clouds. Obviously not to the extent of their father’s powers (like how he made a whole fake Hera out of clouds), but they could use clouds to obstruct people’s vision and make fun shapes for little kids 
Zeus’ children also have an EXTREMELY ACCURATE gut feeling. Extremely accurate in caps because it's that good. Theirs is the only one that could rival Apollo’s kids. Somehow they just know everything
If you asked a child of Zeus what it’s like, they’ll say something along the lines of some random voice randomly appearing in their head and telling them something
It sounds kind of creepy, but it's not. They could just be staring at two people they’ve never met and immediately think, “she’s gonna confess this afternoon,” or something. This ability is especially powerful with the weather. They always know deep down what the weather will be like as soon as they wake up
The sky could be dark grey with thunder rumbling in the background and, as long as a Zeus kid says it won't rain that day, you wouldn’t need an umbrella. This is an ability that becomes pretty handy during quests
Very scary when they’re mad. Ares kids are scared of them when they’re mad. They go quiet and grunt a, “I’m fine,” if you ask them if they’re okay but you can tell they’re angry from the way their eyes seem to get darker and people’s hairs stand on end when they pass by them
#1 grudge holders and believers in payback. Especially if someone hurts the people they love. A lot of their lives were negatively affected by their father’s carelessness towards people he claimed he loved, so they vow to never do the same
If you genuinely believe a Zeus kid has let you off the hook after you did something to upset them, you’re so wrong and I’m scared for you
Anyways love you Zeuserinas please take care and remember you don’t have to be perfect all the time & its okay to rest every once in a while
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wimble-warcrime · 3 months
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Ooh can I request how you think kid and killer would show their interest in you? Basically their way of courting you/beginning of a relationship. Together or separate, whatever you feel like 🖤🖤
hi anon, thanks for the ask! i'd be happy to do both :)
im a big fan of the concept of courting in general (to many period drama influences) so some of these may seem weird or ooc
kidd-
different from killer, who would take a more traditional approach to courting/wooing a potential partner, kidd's approach is more... chaotic... we'll say
we all know that this tulip head has the emotional range of a teaspoon, and therefore struggles with expressing any emotion other than rage and pride, so be prepared for a whirlwind of whiplash
he doesn't know what he wants, you don't know what he wants
killer knows what he wants, but won't be at all helpful in this case
while he will staunchly deny this until the day he dies, kidd's love language is acts of service (beating the shit out of people for you), gift giving (making you things to beat the shit out of people) and quality time (discussing in depth on how to beat the shit out of people)
expect a lot of shiny things, handmade metal contraptions, and requests for you to just sit with him (he tells you he needs someone to hold something for him, or shine the light at a particular angle, but we all know he just wants to be around you)
he fails miserably at any attempts of flirtation
the first time you cackle at him for his terrible pick-up lines, he shuts himself away for a few days. the second time, (with killer's guidance) he realizes that making you laugh would be great way to warm up to each other.
it becomes a witty back-and-forth of banter and cheesy pick-up lines, and a solid friendship is formed. you talk about whatever, he gives his (sadistic) input, he rambles on about his latest invention (probably a weapon) and you give your feedback
you don't know that each of these conversations are pertaining to the same creation, he's (very secretly, and quite skillfully (to killer's surprise)) getting your input, because he's making it for you.
it's months in the making, he probably started right after your first lengthy discussion about preferred weapon types or something like that.
i'd like to think that for kidd, it's obsession at first insult with him, so you'd probably be relatively new to the crew. he wouldn't last long enough to have known (and liked you) for years, no patience with dis man
he gets talkative when he drinks, so i guarantee you the first time he gets like black out drunk around you, he spills his guts. its an unspoked rule amongst the crew, that any 'gushy' feelings that come from that captain while he is inebriated, are not to ever EVER be brought up afterwards.
so you kind of just. sit there. thinking abt the fact that this angry tulip man like you. and wont admit it to your face.
after the first emotional moment TM you guys share, things start to pick up. you are witness to a softer side of the one-dimensional captain, and quite like it.
start seeking those out more. he won't, but the best progress is one made in emotional vulnerability. (dr. wimble advice corner approved)
he cant take a hint, so dont bother dropping any. if you wanna go forward, say something. kidd cannot read (alegedly), let alone between the lines. your best bet is to whip out your tits (gn) in front of him.
i will die on this hill, kidd is firmly a boob guy, dont try to change my mind. he lov em
there is no "so, should we date now?" phase with this guy, he just skips right to the "fucking them with the lights on" phase. a hot and heavy encounter later, and he has firmly planted himself at your side, no takes-backsies~~
you wake up the morning after hovered in hickeys and bite marks, and EVERYONE know your his now. he wont say it, but you are.
killer-
killer on the other hand, is a traditionalist, an 'el hopaness romtic' if ya know what im sayin
he will woo the pants right off you, season two anthony bridgerton wet shirt scene style (iykyk)
you probably aren't new to the crew, kil strikes me as the kinda guy who doesn't know he likes someone until it's too late. like man's good at self reflection and all, but it takes TIME to get to him, so there is no 'love at first fisticuffs' with him.
it starts with friendship (demi killer till the day i die), you two are like each others bestfriends. no one tops kidd (ehehe) for this guy, but you can tie
it's the little things at first, and more one-sided at the beginning (on your end), like complimenting his cooking, offering to help with dishes
maybe you buy him some hair stuff, he did mention that he was running out, off handedly. or, you sharpen up his knives for him while he's away
Killer's love language is also acts of service, more so on the receiving end tho, but he likes to give gifts. he'll cook for you, personally
like one meal just for you type thing. he says he wants you to try out a new recipe of his, but really, he just made you a nice meal, and cant say it to your face.
you two act like a couple already, but both deny it, saying youre just 'really good friends'
he first really realises that he likes you, seriously likes (maybe love) you when you get injured. and not like, oh little scratch, but like, almost died injured.
a foe has never been downed faster, than when killer heard your scream of pain and terror from across the battle field, and fucking flew across to get to you.
it's obvious to anyone that mans got it badd. he doesnt leave your side until youre concious again and the promptly blows up you for being dumb and reckless and almost getting killed. its a nasty fight, one that shatters your friendship. no one expected anything like that from him. probably the most anyone has ever heard from him in one go
he is just worried, but cant tell you that he loves you, without fully knowing how you feel back. not a guy who readily takes risks like that.
it's a few weeks before he's talking to you again, afraid that he astronomically fudged it by his little outburst. the exchanges are clipped, (you, who had been pining hard for him for like ever) and you're positively sure he hates your guts (he doesnt he just scared)
he avoids you, trying to put as much distance between you two as physically possible, trying to get rid of his feelings for you. but the you go and get yourself hurt. again
it was an accident this time, he saw it happen. like slow motion, the knife you were holding was bumped out of your hand by someone backing into you, it fell, cutting your hand open, before notching itself into the flood
he blows up at the person responsible, before dragging you to the medbay to patch you up. all the while, muttering about how clumsy you are, how much of a danger magnet you seem to be.
its at that moment you know how he feels. it's not said outright, but the care he takes with you, treating you like you're glass
you lean down to kiss his mask. just a small pec, an utterance of a 'thank you' whispered after
but
his heart is beating like a wild mustang, and he freezes. he makes sure your affection wasn't just because you were grateful (after he starts working again)
your reassurance is like cupids arrow for his heart. you like him, have liked him for a while
nothing really changes between your dynamic after that, at least from the outside. really, you've started to be more physically affectionate behind closed doors.
it's a huge step when he takes his mask of around you. the lights are off, and you can't see his face, but he lets you touch it. huge step in your relationship
he's still a baddie, violent and unhinged, (to keep up appearances), but when no ones looking, he'll love on you
this feels kinda rushed ngl, but alas, when is it not? anywayz anon, hope you like it! iv'e already done poly! kidkiller here, i hope you enjoy :)
btw my requests are open, but im still in college, so be mindful if it takes me a hot minute to reply to them
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zeldasnotes · 1 month
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Have you seen the news about Sydney Sweeney and the producer that calling her ugly. Do you think its because Sydney have Lilith in 10th house that she attracting haters?
Hi! Yes I saw it and was like damn thats harsh! I think Sydney having both a prominent Lilith and A LOT of scorpio she will get strong reactions from people but in this case I had to look at their synastry because its not often a woman in Hollywood comes out to say publicly that another woman in Hollywood isnt pretty. Like girlie this is 2024.
Im also not the kind of person to think that everytime someone talks shit about someone they have to be envious of that person but in this case Im certain its envy based on their synastry. I think its a strong dislike and envy coming from Carol bc their synastry is kinda bad.
• Asteroid Zavist(7440) is the asteroid of envy and Carols Zavist is smack on Sydneys Ascendant. So she is most likely envious of her appearance.
• Carols Saturn, Toro(asteroid of bullying and Lilith are all 3 conjunct Sydneys Venus so she got a lot to say about Sydneys beauty. And we all know that Saturn likes to criticise. With Carols Lilith conjunct Sydneys Venus we can see that Sydney reminds Carols subconscious of female rivalry, beauty, sex etc. Sydneys whole look is like a punch in the gut for Carol. (Tyra Banks and Naomi Campbell have the same aspect in synastry and we have all seen Tyras obsession with Naomi lol.)
• Carols Mars in Sydneys 2nd house. This aspect leads to a very aggressive envy from the Mars person towards the 2nd house person. Ive seen this a lot irl.
• Carols Chiron conjunct Sydneys Moon. This one is common in the charts of people who hage eachother. This is a strooong sense of opening a wound in Carol. Its in Capricorn and I think it has a lot to do with the reason Sydney have been blowing up the way she has while Carol worked for her career.
• Carols Venus in Sydneys 10th house. Sydney have the public image that Carol might envy or feel like Sydney got it too easy.
• Carol have Moon Square Mars in her own natal chart so she probably struggles with feelings of anger and competetiveness in general. + her Mercury being conjunct Pluto makes her a little too blunt.
CAROL ON THE OUTSIDE, SYDNEY ON THE INSIDE:
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hana-no-seiiki · 1 year
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Idk if this is a request or something but I just wanted to get it out there before I forget it. How would the batfam react to a batsis coming from the last of us universe?( the last of us is a zombie apocalypse type game.) How would they react to all of batsis PTSD from being born in a world over ran by zombie’s and learning to survive at a young age. How would they help them? How would they react if they ever were transported to there(batsis) world?
Sorry for this random ask I just wanted to get this out there before I forget about it. Anyway hope you have a great week!
SOFT YANDERE BATFAM x THE LAST OF US! READER BRAINROT
Recently had a TLOU brainrot (at this point it’s more of a heartrot with how devastating the story is eugh) so this came at a perfect timing. I’m guessing batsib (I’ll make it gn I hope you don’t mind anon) has a similar life to elle if they’re not just elle entirely.
I think Batsib would have to be close to the boys before they eventually spill their guts (aka their severe trauma out).
Like when they’re at least 60% there on the yan scale of things.
They see signs like you being hella adamant on the boys at least trying to fix their relationship with Bruce since you know the most out of everyone how it feels to lose a father figure.
You’re the closest with Jason purely because you both have baggage, and luckily you like to talk about it and sort it out.
Your whole life had been the apocalypse so going to Gotham and seeing everything in its prime fascinated you. When the Batfam first took you in due to your status as an anomaly, it took very little to impress you.
But it also took a lot to terrify you.
If we’re going full on Ellie! Reader here then them (batfam) seeing that huge bite mark on your arms, presumably after you’ve dumped info on your past and your reality, almost turned them feral.
It was that moment they decided to never let you go back.
You’re allowed to join them with their vigilante activities as long as you were under strict surveillance.
Bruce is kind of off-put by your nonchalance when it comes to beating up people to a pulp. He had to jump in and stop you from completely killing a dude.
Jason on the other hand approves. Definitely eggs you on.
The rest of the boys, as is my headcannon with any violent MC, get turned on when they see you covered in blood.
In summary, they definitely cherish you more. The spoiling is dialed up to eleven. And since you didn’t know much of the world prior to its apocalypse state, they wouldn’t lock you up like in most cases and instead bring you to explore as much as you’d like.
There is a sick part of them that enjoys your PTSD and how dependent (and distrusting of others) you can be because of it. So unless it gets really bad where you can’t get sleep at all I can see them just not trying to get help for you.
ON THE MORE WHOLESOME SIDE:
I am now imagining reader going to a museum with them all and just climbing the fossil in front of like dozens of people while screaming “LOOK AT ME I’M ON A MOTHERFUCKING DINOSAURRRR!”
Bruce definitely had to pay a lot for that
and all the younger ones + Dick cause he’s Dick throwing fedora hats on all the dinos??? please im on my knees that’s too cute augh-
If they were ever transported in your world, it’d definitely be the other way around. Say you aren’t like Ellie and are completely susceptible to the infection- oof you might as well just be in jail.
They’ll disinfect everything. Masks 24/7. Generally just extremely careful as to not get infected or infect you in any shape or form.
Tim has already researched on fungal infections so you bet he’s ready. Wouldn’t be surprised if he single-handedly ends the apocalypse with how thorough he was. Him, Dick, and Alfred focus more on taking care of you.
Jason and Damian are more with survival and the annihilation of anything that may be dangerous to you within the vicinity. May it be zombies, thieves, the military and what not.
Bruce is probably tinkering on more equipment and helping Tim with actually getting rid of the fungi. The former will definitely use his charm and looks to get more supplies.
In short, these dudes have everything on lockdown.
You’ll wish you didn’t come back to your original world.
A.N. I hope this was to your liking anon!
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aita for not telling someone i know he’s being bullied?
⚠️ mentions of cancer + a suicide attempt
everyone mentioned here is in their 20s, with the youngest being 21 and the oldest being 28. none of the names used here are anyone��s actual names.
this is kind of a long story with a lot of moving parts and i can’t get into ALL of it so im trying to section JUST this off. basically i’ve had a group of friends for awhile. we met in a larger server and its a pretty big circle, so there is interpersonal drama aplenty. i stepped away from the bigger server and mainly maintained contact with 5-7 friends id made through a personal server and dm conversations.
one of the people in that server, erin (she/they) dm’d me to tell me they had to leave said personal server because they’d had a bit of an incident with 3 of the other members. they ended up telling me that they and the other 3 members had a group chat where they’d regularly talk shit about another person we know, bryce (he/him). apparently they all took something he said months ago WILDLY out of context to claim he’s a transmisogynist and therefore its fine that they bully him (this guy isn’t someone i’ve talked to very much since leaving but i do know him and we are on good terms. he can be a bit difficult to maintain conversations with but he very much is not a transmisogynist. also none of the people in this gc are transfem). like, they conspire in this group chat ways to make him feel bad. erin showed me some screenshots. its pretty textbook highschool mean girls behavior.
erin was also in this group chat and finally got fed up with them all and told them they need to stop trying to justify their actions. its pretty obvious bryce is not the bigot they’re saying he is and they’re just using that as an excuse to be cruel. the people in the group chat did not take that well so erin left and has also left any mutual servers they’re in with them.
she only told me all this because i offered to let her vent, but now im in kind of a rough spot morally. i think the correct thing to do here would be to let bryce know, but im being. kind of a coward about it.
this all may sound like im just throwing myself a pity party, but i am in a very, very bad spot right now. like i said, there was a ton of interpersonal drama in this group and i’ve been in the center of it before. it took a massive toll on me. so im not keen to get involved in drama in general, but also, mainly. i lost my best friend (minze, she/her) to cancer at the start of this year. i’ve known her since childhood and i’ve barely been able to function without her. we lived together. i still take care of her cat. we had the same birthday, and its coming up in a little over a week. i’ve been absolutely gutted knowing this is the first birthday ill spend without her in over a decade. i tried to kill myself a couple of weeks ago because i couldn’t bear the thought of it. i failed, obviously. and im fine at the moment but im definitely not perfectly well and im barely hanging on by a thread
i left the larger group because i couldn’t stand to be involved with everything going on. if i tell bryce about this group chat, i will be getting involved again. i dont think they know i know about it at this point but the only people who could tell him would be me and erin. even if i did it anonymously or asked him not to tell it would be incredibly easy to trace back to me. while im appalled to know my friends have been so viciously cruel to someone for no reason, since losing minze these people have been my only support network. they all knew minze, too. they’re some of the only people i can share memories of her with. i dont think i could process this grief alone
i know i need better friends but i don’t have them right now. i’ve sort of already got a strained relationship with some of them and i worry this could be the last straw and id just… lose them abruptly. and i know if that happened id put myself at risk again, because id be just as heavily suicidal but now with no one to confide in about it
bryce deserves to know. its the right thing to do, but it would cause me a dangerous amount of mental strain. but even though i say i don’t want to get involved i do feel, on some level, like i probably got involved the second i let erin even tell me about this. so i feel like im being a whiny dickhead and just making excuses but im just. im not willing to put myself through this again. not right now. aita?
What are these acronyms?
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ao3commentoftheday · 2 years
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i find myself lately frustrated with my writing; it feels like nothing i am producing is right....im not liking any of it, and its frustrating and sad because i used to really like it but dont know where stuff went wrong. im trying to take a break but its hard because trying to fill the times where im usually writing with something else makes me feel empty :/
I'm sorry you're going through all of this, anon. This feels like a lot to deal with.
In a situation like this, it can be helpful to look at each piece of the puzzle and see which one you're able to deal with right now and which ones you'll need to come back to later when you're up to it.
You're frustrated because it feels like nothing you're creating is right. The key here is figuring out what's wrong with it. Is it a story that you're not interested in anymore? Is there a plot point that you wrote out that you don't like anymore but it feels like a lot of work to go back and revise the story to take it out? Are characters feeling "off" in some way? Does it feel like it's missing something and you can't figure out what? Depending on your answers, the way to resolve this might be putting the story aside. But it might also be abandoning the story altogether or gutting it fairly significantly in order to keep the parts that you do like in order to get rid of the stuff that you don't.
You used to like it and you don't know where it went wrong. It might be that plot point issue I mentioned above, or it could be another factor. How are you feeling about the fandom in general? About your life external to fandom? Unhappiness in other areas of our lives can cause frustration in the places where we used to find happiness. Are you feeling sadness, frustration, and discontent about other things you used to enjoy? Do you have stresses in your life that might be affecting you? This one might require you to talk to someone about what's going on.
You're trying to take a break but it's hard. Fandom is a wonderful community full of joy and giving. But it's also a community where we can sometimes pressure ourselves too much. Sometimes taking a break can feel like you'll lose your audience - like they'll forget you when you're gone. Sometimes taking a break can make you feel guilty because all you can think about are the people who are waiting on the next story or the next chapter. When you're tired and frustrated and sad, you need to stop thinking about others and start focusing on yourself. There's no shame in needing a rest. Everyone does sometimes. And as for losing your audience, a lot of them will still be there when you return and the ones who left might be replaced by new people who will just be discovering your art.
You feel empty when you're not writing, so you can't think of another way to fill your time. What parts of writing fill you up? What about it gives you energy or inspiration or happiness? Is it the moments where you're imagining? The moments when you're crafting sentences? Is it the moments when you're talking to a friend about the next plot point or cackling over how people will react to your cliffhanger? Is it seeing kudos and comments come into your inbox? Seeing your fic get talked about on tumblr? Depending on what parts of writing satisfy a need inside of you, the way you fill that time will differ. If you need the creative outlet, doing something else creative like painting or baking or gardening etc. might help. If it's the parts surrounding friendships, then spending time doing things with people you care about might help. If it's about the attention you get from your fellow fans, look into some kind of performance outlet - either in person or via social media. Figure out what you need first and it'll be that much easier to get it.
You might only have to look at one of these items. You might need to consider them all. Either way, you can't really solve the problem until you figure out what it actually is.
It's been a long time since you sent this in, anon, and i'm so sorry for the delay. I hope you're in a better mental place now and that you're found your way to whatever your next joyful moment might be.
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