#bloody tongue crew represent

[happyheidi]

#I love lemons #I eat one a day these days #I love sour things. citrus. YUM #bloody tongue crew represent #cottagecore #summer aesthetic #lemons #vegetables #nature #naturecore #warmcore

[istumpysk]

Operation Stumpy Re-Read

ADWD: Tyrion VIII (Chapter 33)

A huge man, taller than Ser Jorah and wide enough to make two of him, the priest wore scarlet robes embroidered at sleeve and hem and collar with orange satin flames. His skin was black as pitch, his hair as white as snow; the flames tattooed across his cheeks and brow yellow and orange. His iron staff was as tall as he was and crowned with a dragon's head; when he stamped its butt upon the deck, the dragon's maw spat crackling green flame.

Dark flame!

He's massive, and Daenerys shouldn't trust him? Looks like I have a new crush.

Green flames mixed with dragons sounds like fun.

+.+.+

His guardsmen, five slave warriors of the Fiery Hand, led the responses. They chanted in the tongue of Old Volantis, but Tyrion had heard the prayers enough to grasp the essence. Light our fire and protect us from the dark, blah blah, light our way and keep us toasty warm, the night is dark and full of terrors, save us from the scary things, and blah blah blah some more.

He finally made me laugh.

+.+.+

The Selaesori Qhoran was a wallowing tub of five hundred tons, with a deep hold, high castles fore and aft, and a single mast between. At her forecastle stood a grotesque figurehead, some worm-eaten wooden eminence with a constipated look and a scroll tucked up under one arm. Tyrion had never seen an uglier ship. 

Someone tell me who or what this figurehead represents.

+.+.+

Three of the mates and more than three-quarters of the crew were fervent worshipers of the Lord of Light. Tyrion was less certain about the captain, who always emerged for the evening prayers but took no other part in them. But Moqorro was the true master of the Selaesori Qhoran, at least for this voyage.

"Lord of Light, bless your slave Moqorro, and light his way in the dark places of the world," the red priest boomed. "And defend your righteous slave Benerro. Grant him courage. Grant him wisdom. Fill his heart with fire."

If this ship is the perfumed seneschal then religious fanaticism is what Daenerys needs to be cautious of. She wouldn't be warned about Moqorro or Tyrion twice.

+.+.+

And the sight of me can only be salt in her [Penny] wound. They hacked off her brother's head in the hope that it was mine, yet here I sit like some bloody gargoyle, offering empty consolations. If I were her, I'd want nothing more than to shove me into the sea.

Including for those who think Tyrion will drown.

+.+.+

The red priest rested by day but kept vigil through the dark hours, to tend his sacred flames so that the sun might return to them at dawn.

A religion for people who need a night light.

+.+.+

He was staring into the flickering flames, lost in some vision. Does he see days yet to come, as he claims? If so, that was a fearsome gift. 

I'd say curse.

+.+.+

"Someone told me that the night is dark and full of terrors. What do you see in those flames?"

"Dragons," Moqorro said in the Common Tongue of Westeros. He spoke it very well, with hardly a trace of accent. No doubt that was one reason the high priest Benerro had chosen him to bring the faith of R'hllor to Daenerys Targaryen. "Dragons old and young, true and false, bright and dark. And you. A small man with a big shadow, snarling in the midst of all."

That's considered fAegon evidence.

Dragons old and young: The youngins & Aemon? Bloodraven?

True and false: The real ones & Aegon? Jon? In a way Daenerys is also false.

Bright and dark: The good ones & Daenerys? Bloodraven?

And you. A small man with a big shadow, snarling in the midst of all:

When he opened the door, the light from within threw his shadow clear across the yard, and for just a moment Tyrion Lannister stood tall as a king. - Jon I, AGOT

x

"A shadow on the wall," Varys murmured, "yet shadows can kill. And ofttimes a very small man can cast a very large shadow." - Tyrion II, ACOK

x

"You are fighting shadows when you should be fighting the men who cast them," Daario went on. - Daenerys IV, ADWD

+.+.+

"Did you see how long it will take us to reach Meereen?"

"You are eager to behold the world's deliverer?"

I can't wait for these people to be in her inner circle. I'm giddy at the thought.

+.+.+

Tell me, was Selaesori Qhoran a triarch or a turtle?"

The red priest chuckled. "Neither. Qhoran is … not a ruler, but one who serves and counsels such, and helps conduct his business. You of Westeros might say steward or magister."

King's Hand? That amused him. "And selaesori?"

Moqorro touched his nose. "Imbued with a pleasant aroma. Fragrant, would you say? Flowery?"

"So Selaesori Qhoran means Stinky Steward, more or less?"

"Fragrant Steward, rather."

Tyrion gave a crooked grin. "I believe I will stay with Stinky. But I do thank you for the lesson."

Is it a misdirection, a clue, or simply the ship? You decide!

"No. Hear me, Daenerys Targaryen. The glass candles are burning. Soon comes the pale mare, and after her the others. Kraken and dark flame, lion and griffin, the sun's son and the mummer's dragon. Trust none of them. Remember the Undying. Beware the perfumed seneschal." - Daenerys II, ADWD

+.+.+

He found Mormont stretched out in the lower one, swaying slowly with the motion of the ship. "The girl finally poked her nose abovedecks," Tyrion told him. "One look at me and she scurried right back down below."

"You're not a pretty sight."

"Not all of us can be as comely as you. The girl is lost. It would not surprise me if the poor creature wasn't sneaking up to jump over the side and drown herself."

That's funny, he does the comely thing twice with these two.

Sometimes she would close her eyes and dream of him, but it was never Jorah Mormont she dreamed of; her lover was always younger and more comely, though his face remained a shifting shadow. - Daenerys II, ASOS

↓

Ser Jorah had never been what one might call a comely man. The brand had transformed his face into something frightening.

Tyrion grinned. "As long as I look prettier than you, I will be happy." - Tyrion XII, ADWD

+.+.+

Groat and Penny. The smallest coins, worth the least, and what's worse, they chose the names themselves. It left a bad taste in Tyrion's mouth. "By any name, she needs a friend."

Ser Jorah sat up in his hammock. "Befriend her, then. Marry her, for all I care."

[...]

"You were the one who insisted that we bring her."

"I said we could not abandon her in Volantis. That does not mean I want to fuck her. She wants me dead, have you forgotten? I'm the last person she's like to want as a friend."

Fantastic, we're giving Tyrion a vulnerable girl in need of rescuing. Vomit.

+.+.+

"You are a harmless creature, to be sure. Innocent as a lamb." Ser Jorah got to his feet. "The dwarf girl is your burden. Kiss her, kill her, or avoid her, as you like. It's naught to me." He shouldered past Tyrion and out of the cabin.

Twice exiled, and small wonder, Tyrion thought. I'd exile him too if I could. The man is cold, brooding, sullen, deaf to humor. And those are his good points. 

Let's wait and see if you're afforded that type of influence at the end.

+.+.+

Life aboard the Selaesori Qhoran was nothing if not tedious, Tyrion had found. The most exciting part of his day was pricking his toes and fingers with a knife.

This guy still fears greyscale, yet that didn't stop him from ejaculating inside a bed slave. I will never get over it.

+.+.+

And the nights were worse. Tyrion slept badly at the best of times, and this was far from that. Sleep meant dreams as like as not, and in his dreams the Sorrows waited, and a stony king with his father's face. 

Later in the chapter:

Gerion Lannister had set sail for Valyria when Tyrion was eighteen, intent on recovering the lost ancestral blade of House Lannister and any other treasures that might have survived the Doom. Tyrion had wanted desperately to go with them, but his lord father had dubbed the voyage a "fool's quest," and forbidden him to take part.

And perhaps he was not so wrong. Almost a decade had passed since the Laughing Lion headed out from Lannisport, and Gerion had never returned. The men Lord Tywin sent to seek after him had traced his course as far as Volantis, where half his crew had deserted him and he had bought slaves to replace them.

Many people believe the Shrouded Lord is Gerion Lannister. I'm not sure what the point of that would be, but okay.

+.+.+

Dark and deep and forbidding, beautiful in a chilly sort of way, but when he looked at it too long Tyrion found himself musing on how easy it would be to slip over the gunwale and drop down into that darkness. One very small splash, and the pathetic little tale that was his life would soon be done. But what if there is a hell and my father's waiting for me?

Including for those who think Tyrion will drown.

+.+.+

Her captain being an especially bookish man, she carried three—a collection of nautical poetry that went from bad to worse, a well-thumbed tome about the erotic adventures of a young slave girl in a Lysene pillow house, and the fourth and final volume of The Life of the Triarch Belicho, a famous Volantene patriot whose unbroken succession of conquests and triumphs ended rather abruptly when he was eaten by giants. 

Shoutout to @aegor-bamfsteel!

+.+.+

Then, for lack of any other books, he started reading them again. The slave girl's story was the worst written but the most engrossing

If that's a commentary on his own series, I'm going to die of laughter.

Her chapters are the worst written.

+.+.+

We went to Tyrosh first. My brother thought that would be far enough, but it wasn't. We knew a juggler there. For years and years he would juggle every day by the Fountain of the Drunken God. He was old, so his hands were not as deft as they had been, and sometimes he would drop his balls and chase them across the square, but the Tyroshi would laugh and throw him coins all the same. Then one morning we heard that his body had been found at the Temple of Trios. Trios has three heads, and there's a big statue of him beside the temple doors. The old man had been cut into three parts and pushed inside the threefold mouths of Trios. Only when the parts were sewn back together, his head was gone."

One time, the girl remembered, the Sailor's Wife had walked her rounds with her and told her tales of the city's stranger gods. "That is the house of the Great Shepherd. Three-headed Trios has that tower with three turrets. The first head devours the dying, and the reborn emerge from the third. I don't know what the middle head's supposed to do. - The Ugly Little Girl, ADWD

I feel like there's a hidden message here.

+.+.+

"He died for you. His blood is on your hands."

The accusation stung, coming so hard on the heels of Jorah Mormont's words. "His blood is on my sister's hands, and the hands of the brutes who killed him. My hands …" Tyrion turned them over, inspected them, coiled them into fists. "… my hands are crusted with old blood, aye. Call me kinslayer, and you won't be wrong. Kingslayer, I'll answer to that one as well. I have killed mothers, fathers, nephews, lovers, men and women, kings and whores. A singer once annoyed me, so I had the bastard stewed. But I have never killed a juggler, nor a dwarf, and I am not to blame for what happened to your bloody brother."

Most of that is true.

+.+.+

Tyrion remembered the storm he'd suffered crossing the narrow sea, the way the deck had jumped beneath his feet, the hideous creaking sounds the ship had made, the taste of wine and vomit. "No-Nose will stay up here." If the gods wanted him, he would sooner die by drowning than choking on his own vomit. 

Including for those who think Tyrion will drown.

Please make the Sailor's Wife a prophet! Do it.

+.+.+

The salt air lay still and heavy that morning, but the western sky was a fiery red, streaked with lowering clouds that glowed as bright as Lannister crimson.

[...]

Behind them black clouds piled one atop another against a blood-red sky. By midmorning they could see lightning flickering to the west, followed by the distant crash of thunder. The sea grew rougher, and dark waves rose up to smash against the hull of the Stinky Steward.

Is it the Doom of Valyria or the Doom of Daenerys?

+.+.+

Her teeth were crooked, which made her shy with her smiles, but she smiled now. "Did you truly cook a singer in a stew?"

"Who, me? No. I do not cook."

When Penny giggled, she sounded like the sweet young girl she was … seventeen, eighteen, no more than nineteen. "What did he do, this singer?"

"He wrote a song about me." For she was his secret treasure, she was his shame and his bliss. And a chain and a keep are nothing, compared to a woman's kiss. It was queer how quick the words came back to him. Perhaps they had never left him. Hands of gold are always cold, but a woman's hands are warm.

If Wyman Manderly is destined to die for forcing cannibalism on others, why isn't Tyrion?

+.+.+

"It was Father's idea to do the tilts. He even trained the first pig, but by then he was too sick to ride her, so Oppo took his place. I always rode the dog. We performed for the Sealord of Braavos once, and he laughed so hard that afterward he gave each of us a … a grand gift."

Dot, dot, dot. That's strange.

Braavos is synonymous with a certain type of gift.

Women bring life into the world. We bring the gift of death. No one can do both. - Arya II, AFFC

x

That very night he chose the most wretched of the slaves, the one who had prayed most earnestly for release, and freed him from his bondage. The first gift had been given. - Arya II, AFFC

x

"Give a certain man a certain gift. Can you do that?" - The Ugly Little Girl, ADWD

Did Penny have someone killed? Lol.

What else could it be, a coin?

+.+.+

"Is that where my sister found you? In Braavos?"

"Your sister?" The girl looked lost.

"Queen Cersei."

Penny shook her head. "She never … it was a man who came to us, in Pentos. Osmund. No, Oswald. Something like that. Oppo met with him, not me. Oppo made all of our arrangements. My brother always knew what to do, where we should go next."

He's so meta in this chapter. That was George poking fun at himself.

Oswald Kettleblack was the first to laugh. - Tyrion X, ASOS

x

"There's your poisoner," suggested Ser Oswald Kettleblack with a sly grin. - Jaime VIII, ASOS

There is no Oswald Kettleblack.

None of this matters. Tyrion could have been told it was Littlefinger's idea and he still wouldn't have done anything about it.

+.+.+

That same night, she came right out and asked him if he would like to tilt with her. "No," he answered. Only later did it occur to him that perhaps tilt did not mean tilt. His answer would still have been no, but he might not have been so brusque.

Nooo Penny.

+.+.+

One of the mates was on the sterncastle, and amidships Moqorro sat by his brazier, where a few small flames still danced amongst the embers.

Only the brightest stars were visible, all to the west. A dull red glow lit the sky to the northeast, the color of a blood bruise. Tyrion had never seen a bigger moon. Monstrous, swollen, it looked as if it had swallowed the sun and woken with a fever. Its twin, floating on the sea beyond the ship, shimmered red with every wave. "What hour is this?" he asked Moqorro. "That cannot be sunrise unless the east has moved. Why is the sky red?"

"The sky is always red above Valyria, Hugor Hill."

A cold chill went down his back.

A lot of people believe this is pointing to Mirri Maz Duur's words.

"When will he be as he was?" Dany demanded.

"When the sun rises in the west and sets in the east," said Mirri Maz Duur. "When the seas go dry and mountains blow in the wind like leaves. When your womb quickens again, and you bear a living child. Then he will return, and not before." - Daenerys IX, AGOT

That was not a prophecy, that was a fuck you.

And I don't think it has anything to do with the following either.

"To go north, you must journey south. To reach the west, you must go east. To go forward you must go back, and to touch the light you must pass beneath the shadow." - Daenerys III, ACOK.

+.+.+

Valyria. It was written that on the day of Doom every hill for five hundred miles had split asunder to fill the air with ash and smoke and fire, blazes so hot and hungry that even the dragons in the sky were engulfed and consumed. Great rents had opened in the earth, swallowing palaces, temples, entire towns. Lakes boiled or turned to acid, mountains burst, fiery fountains spewed molten rock a thousand feet into the air, red clouds rained down dragonglass and the black blood of demons, and to the north the ground splintered and collapsed and fell in on itself and an angry sea came rushing in. The proudest city in all the world was gone in an instant, its fabled empire vanished in a day, the Lands of the Long Summer scorched and drowned and blighted.

An empire built on blood and fire. The Valyrians reaped the seed they had sown.

What lesson can I pull from this?

+.+.+

"Our captain would prefer to be fifty leagues farther out to sea, well away from that accursed shore, but I have commanded him to steer the shortest course. Others seek Daenerys too."

Griff, with his young prince. Could all that talk of the Golden Company sailing west have been a feint? Tyrion considered saying something, then thought better. It seemed to him that the prophecy that drove the red priests had room for just one hero. A second Targaryen would only serve to confuse them. "Have you seen these others in your fires?" he asked, warily.

"Only their shadows," Moqorro said. "One most of all. A tall and twisted thing with one black eye and ten long arms, sailing on a sea of blood."

A second Targaryen would only serve to confuse them.

Just you wait!

Final thoughts:

Imagine Daenerys is on the verge of going full berserk and it's Penny or her memory that convinces Tyrion humanity is worth fighting for.

I will gag.

43 down, 6 to go. :(

-> return to menu <-

#operation stumpy re-read #adwd #tyrion viii

[hstyleshoney]

Luck On Tour

A/N: Soo, this is my little thing for @oh-honey-styles​ HSFICSLAM 2 challenge. I’ve been struggling to write something for a while now and this kind of just caught my attention because it seemed like fun. It’s nothing too serious or fancy. Just a little bit of fun. If one person enjoys it then I’m happy, bc I just had a good time writing again. 

Let me know your thoughts, it would mean a lot!!! xx 

WC: 2.7K // a cheesy story about good luck charms and love 

“You’re jealous aren’t you?”

“What?” 

You blinked and turned around to glance at Charlotte who was looking at you with a smug smile. She raised her eyebrows knowingly and nodded her head in the direction you had just been glaring.

“I told you this was gonna happen.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you told her, taking a deep breath, before forcing a strangled laugh from your chest. “Why would I be jealous?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Charlotte hummed and tapped her chin, pretending to be deep in thought before continuing. “Maybe because you two have been sleeping together for a couple of weeks now and you won’t admit it’s more than a ‘friends with benefits’ type of thing.”

You opened your mouth to tell her she was wrong, but Charlotte stopped you by putting her hand up and adding; “And now you’ve been glaring at poor Rosie for the last ten minutes for doing his hair - which, you know, is her job.”  

“I have not.”

“Sure,” she chuckled mockingly and pressed her lips together to stop herself from grinning. “If you say so.”

Instead of replying you turned around to look at Harry again. He sat across the room from you, getting ready for the last and final show of his tour, with Rosie standing in front of him. Your eyes went to her hands as she ran her fingers through his brown hair and twirled his locks around her fingers to give him a little more definition.

And you had no reason to be jealous - but maybe you were? Just a little bit. Just the tiniest little bit jealous.

Because you now knew just how soft his hair was and that morning you had been the one to soothingly run your hands through it as he rested his head on your chest, cuddling up to you and holding you close.

Still, you really shouldn’t be jealous, because Rosie was only doing her job as his hairstylist and there was absolutely no reason for you to be jealous. None. Nada. Zero.

But then there was also that interviewer who, in your opinion, sat way too close to him and touched his arm a little too often. Laughing and flirting with him like no one else was around. It left a sour taste in your mouth, although you would never admit that outloud. Especially not to Charlotte.

It was only supposed to be a bit of fun. It was never supposed to get to this point. You were only supposed to be the tour photographer. Harry had liked the pictures you had taken of him during one of his Jingle Bell Ball performances a while back. And when his regular photographer wasn’t able to join him on the North American part of his tour, due to a conflict in her schedule, his team reached out and asked if you were available.

You were.

So a couple weeks later you were on a plane, traveling across the Atlantic, and ended up befriending one of the world's biggest pop stars.

How you ended up naked in his bed after the show in Chicago was still something you were trying to figure out.

It kind of just... happened.

One of the crew members had turned 40 and Harry had arranged a big birthday party for him after the show. You weren’t supposed to be working but you couldn’t stop yourself from pulling out your camera, the moment was there and you wanted to capture everyone's good spirits. Harry came up to you, a plate of cake in one hand and a drink in the other, forcing you to take it from him and telling you to put the camera away and have some fun.

One drink turned into another, and another turned into a third, and the third turned into a shot of tequila. It was all just downhill from there.

As the night went on you found yourself being drawn closer to Harry and when his fingers danced across the skin on your thigh you knew there was no going back. An hour later you stumbled into his hotel room, and his hands and lips were all over you as you ripped his shirt from his body before the door was even fully closed behind you.

The next morning you woke up with a raging headache and a belly full of regret because it was terribly unprofessional of you to sleep with the artist you were supposed to be working for. You were sure you were going to be told to pack your bags and go back home.

Of course that didn’t happen and Harry was nothing but sweet. He ordered both of you breakfast and let you sleep off your hangover in his bed while he got himself ready for the day.

Then it kind of just became a thing, because life on the road could be a little lonely and your pink vibrator wasn’t always enough.

It didn't bring you the same warmth Harry did.

And he didn’t seem to mind sharing a bed with you either, even if he sometimes complained about your cold toes rubbing against his legs.

So, really, who were you to say no?

But perhaps you should’ve because now the tour was coming to an end and you had no idea where the two of you stood and the uncertainty of it all was making you jealous of his hairstylist touching him - not ideal.

Which was why you decided to remove yourself from the situation and went to get your camera ready instead. You found yourself a quiet spot in a small corner next to the stage and tried to ignore the immature thoughts about Harry and Rosie running through your mind.

You shouldn't be jealous. It was stupid. Besides you and Harry weren’t anything exclusive. Sure, he made your heart beat twice as fast and made you feel things you had only ever read about in novels before, but you hadn’t told him any of that yet.

And you weren’t really sure how to tell him any of that. 

Should you even tell him?

Telling him would make it real and what if he didn’t feel the same... that would certainly be the end of whatever was going on between the two of you. 

But it was possible that the end of the tour also represented the end of the two of you, so, maybe you didn’t even have anything to lose by telling him?

You groaned to yourself and ran a hand over your face in frustration, eyes squeezed shut as you tried to drown out your thoughts with the sound from all the screaming fans in the already full-packed arena. The anticipation was high and usually it made your whole body itch with excitement as well, there was just so much love and adoration going around for one person. It was impossible to not be part of it, but tonight it only made your belly twist with anxiety.

You were going to miss it. The loud crowds. The anticipation. The joy radiating off of everyone in the arenas. The ringing in your ears as you got into bed hours later. The sparkle in Harry’s eyes as he looked through the pictures you’d taken and saw the happy faces of his fans.

You were going to miss him. Harry.

It was one of the reasons you hadn’t asked him how he felt about the two of you. If he turned around and said that your late night rendezvous was only a bit of fun while you were on the road... Well, it was something you weren’t ready to hear just yet.

Fuck.

It was also at that exact moment that Harry decided to show up, only a couple minutes before he was due to go out on stage.

“There you are,” he called out when he spotted you, your green trousers and matching striped blazer making you stand out from your little hideout in the dark corner. You watched as he said something to Jeff before making his way over to you. “Been lookin’ for ya for bloody ages - thought I’d have to go on stage without a goodluck from my little ladybug.”

You tried your best to ignore the way your whole body tingled from his little nickname for you; a nickname that started after he noticed the small little ladybug ring you always wore on your right index finger. You had had it since you were twelve and you just couldn’t get rid of it. Ever since you first saw it in the small thrift shop in your hometown it had been your good luck charm.

And once Harry asked about it and learned that you wore it every single day for good luck, he decided it was also the reason why the North American tour had been going so well and didn’t go on stage before you had wished him a good show.

“Well, here I am.”

Harry frowned and stopped in his tracks. You couldn’t look at him, the high waisted trousers and sparkling suit jacket he was wearing made your already racing heart beat even faster.

“Is everything alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just getting ready,”  you muttered and nodded down to the camera in your hands. You didn’t mean to sound so bitter but the words fell from your lips before you could stop yourself. “Are you all set for the last show then? Maybe you should go find Rosie again to make sure the hair is good.”

You regretted it as soon as you said it, your cheeks turning hot as the last phrase slipped from your tongue.

That was stupid.

His eyes burned through your skin and you knew there was no way he was going to let your snide little remark go. Stupid stupid stupid.

For a moment you contemplated just making a run for it so you could hide in the lively crowd for the whole show and then simply just disappear into the night, so you wouldn’t ever have to look Harry Styles in the eyes ever again.

But something stopped you.

A low, almost inaudible, chuckle fell from the man in front of you and you glanced up at him just as his lips curled into a small smirk, his dimple appearing on his cheek, and you felt your face grow even hotter. “Don’t look at me like that.” 

Harry held his hands up innocently.

“I’m not looking at you in any way,” he said, still smirking, and let his tongue poke out to lick his pink lips.

“Yes, you are! I don’t like that-” you started and waved your finger at him, “Whatever it is you're doing with your face.”

“Are you jealous?” Harry asked, ignoring your frustrated little stomp, and took a step closer to you.

“What? No, don’t be ridiculous,” you said, taking a shaky breath and a step backwards away from him, making both of you disappear in the shadows of the dark corner where you had previously been hiding as he followed and continued to come closer.

“You are, aren’t you?”

“I’m not.”

“It’s fine if you are.”

“You really need to stop or I’ll only snap pictures of you from your worst angles tonight.”

Not that he really had any bad angles but that was beside the point. It was absolutely infuriating how he could see right through you so easily.

Harry laughed and took one final step forward, trapping you between his body and the wall. His familiar perfume washed over you and you wanted to bathe in it forever. He always smelled so damn good, and for a moment you forgot about your childish behavior from a couple seconds ago and let yourself get lost in the green of his eyes

“You know you have nothing to be jealous of, right?” Harry told you and reached out to push a strand of your hair away from your face. His fingers gently brushed across the apple of your cheek, making your heart flutter and head fuzzy. He was no longer smirking at you but his lips were still turned upwards. Instead of the smug smirk he was now looking down at you with a soft smile - the same smile you had gotten so used to seeing first thing in the morning, and you were sure you wouldn’t mind if you got to see it every morning for the rest of your life.

“Do I?” you breathed out nervously. 

“Well, when we’re back in London I'm gonna make sure to finally take you on a proper date and-”

“What?”

You didn’t mean to cut him off. It just took you completely off guard and the words fell from your lips before you could think twice about it. “You want to take me out on a date in London?”

That caught him a little off guard.

“Oh,” Harry faltered a little and scratched the back of his neck. For the first time there was a hint of nervousness across his otherwise confident features. “I kind of just assumed we would, eh, we don’t have to- I mean if you, um- if you don’t- I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed you wanted to continue things back home.”

And you probably really should’ve said something then, but you were at a loss for words. It was the first time either of you had ever mentioned something about seeing each other after the tour was done. You finally had an answer to the question that had swirled around in your head for days and had created the uncertainty and jealousy in the first place. Just like that.

You had spent all day trying to decide whether you should tell him your feelings for him had changed and admit you wanted to see him more, and there he was -- already planning for your first official date.

You really needed to say something.

But someone else beat you to it.

“H!” It was Jeff. ���You’ve got less than a minute until you have to get on stage, c’mon!”

Harry turned around and gave his friend a thumbs up, to let him know he had heard him, before he looked down at you again.

“Alright, duty calls I guess,” he said and gave you a small smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Again, I’m sorry.”

And you knew you had to say something because you couldn’t let him do his final show thinking you didn’t actually want to continue seeing him. Especially when it was the opposite of what you wanted.

“Wait,” you burst out and reached for his hand to stop him from leaving. “I do. I do want to see you.”

Harry’s dimple made another appearance and there was so much more you wanted to say to him. You wanted to tell him how thankful you were to have met him. How happy he made you. How safe you felt in his company. How you could always be yourself around him. How he actually had no right to complain about your cold feet because his own were even colder.

But Jeff beat you again.

“Harry!” He shouted. “Get your ass over here!”

“We probably shouldn’t talk about this right now,” Harry chuckled and pulled you a little closer, his hand still in yours.

“Probably not,” you mumbled and watched as Harry ran his fingers over your dainty little ladybug ring, before lifting your hand to his mouth and pressing a soft kiss to it. His warm lips lingered for a couple seconds on your skin and you could have melted into a puddle right there and then.

“Wish me luck then,” he smiled, his lips still brushing against the skin on top of your hand.  

“You don’t need it.”

“Shhh, don’t ruin it now,” he shushed and shook his head lightly. “S’the last show. I need my ladybug luck.”

“If you need your ladybug luck,” you began quietly and pulled your hand away from his. Harry pouted and reached for your hand to have the little ladybug on your ring between you again, but you were quicker and put your arm around his waist. “Why haven’t you kissed me yet?”

A grin broke out across his face and he didn’t waste any time before pressing his lips to yours in a soft kiss that filled your belly with butterflies. Warmth consumed your whole body as you leaned into the kiss and Harry smiled against your lips. You really could’ve stayed in that moment forever.

“Harry!”

Jeff called his name again.

Harry let out an excessive sigh as he broke your kiss and leaned his forehead against yours. His breath warm on your face and as he pressed his lips to yours again in a short peck you realised you were still smiling as well. 

Then he was off to do his final show. 

And despite the thousands of ear piercing screams that filled the arena as he entered the stage the sweet little “Good luck” you shouted after him was the loudest one. 

.

<3 

#HSFICSLAM #Harry Styles fanfiction #Harry Styles fanfic #Harry Styles writing #harry styles x reader #Harry Styles concept #Harry Styles blurb #Harry Styles Drabble

[let-it-raines]

Playing the Waiting Game

For years, Emma was told to stay away from pirates and others who did not uphold the integrity of the crown she was raised to represent. Emma was never particularly good at listening, however, and while she can still hear the words of her parents in the recesses of her mind, there’s a louder voice that keeps calling her to one particular pirate captain.

rating: a soft m

found on ao3 | here | 

-/-

Birdsong rings out from above her, wings whipping through trees and rustling the leaves, and Emma uses the sounds to keep her own footsteps quiet. There are too many leaves and stray branches scattered on the forest floor, and while she doubts there is anyone else out here when most everyone has work to attend to, she still likes to keep her presence quiet. She’s old enough to know that she’s never truly alone, and lately there seems to be some kind of danger around every corner.

Or, at least, that’s what her father was always telling her.

She was brought up with these never-ending senses of freedom and adventure and hope, and while remnants of those three remain in some of her choices, there are voices in the back of her mind reminding her to be careful with her actions.

And with her heart.

One of those voices is her father. The other is very clearly her mother.

Right now, she’d rather not hear from either of them for once.

After a few minutes of wandering, she finally finds the spot for which she was searching. Beyond the trees but before the cliffs, Emma walks upon a spring with water babbling and then rushing away as it travels to the ocean. It is not salty like the water of the sea, isn’t constantly filled with fisherman and Naval officers and the occasional pirate ship , and she seeks the peace of it and how refreshing it is to bathe without having to listen to the commotion that’s always taking place in the tavern. Emma will be forever thankful for Granny and Ruby for giving her a room and work with good pay, but the simplicity and lawlessness of the place is not what she’s accustomed to.

Well, it is now.

Looking around once more, Emma decides there is no one around, and she shrugs off her cape before working around the buttons at the back of her dress. She doesn’t have on a corset today, can’t be forced into one unless she’s trying to earn more coin at the tavern or at the docks when she sells jewelry with Ruby, but undressing still brings her a sense of freedom and a lightness that couldn’t be found for many years.

“That’s the ability to breathe,” Granny always says. “Men take it for granted because they can wear whatever they damn well please, while we have to wear torture devices to keep our waists trim and our breasts high. Bloody ridiculous.”

When Emma’s toes sink into the water, it’s chilled. The month is not yet March, but it’s a particularly sunny day. Emma assumed the waters would be fine, and after a few minutes of shivering, they are. The Summer Isles are never too cold. Misthaven used to freeze every year, frost and snow covering all of the land, and while Emma does miss the snow, she at least doesn’t have to worry about losing her toes to frostbite.

Humming to herself, Emma takes her hair out of its plaits and then wades beneath the water, letting every inch of her long, golden hair soak, before she swims to the shore and reaches over for the lotions she brought with her. This one smells of lavender, and while she knows that Ruby is not fond of the thought of becoming someone’s wife, Emma selfishly wonders if Ruby might marry Graham so that he can continue to bring soaps and lotions to the tavern.

Then again, Emma is sure she could procure these all on her own. She has some coin stashed away, could sell some of her finer dresses and jewels that she managed to bring with her, but doing that seems like erasing her parents.

Their voices pop back up again, such hope and optimism there, and she pushes them away.

Not today, not today, not today.

“If it isn’t Ms. Swan lazing about in the spring.”

Emma’s eyes spring open, and she sinks further into the water while her heart beats an erratic pace. What the hell is he doing here? How did he find her here? How did she not hear him walk over the crunch of the leaves on the ground?

“What are you doing here?” Emma finally manages to ask. He smirks, eyes looking downward, and she crosses her arms over her chest to cover her breasts.  

“Well, I was going to endeavor to take a proper bath without being hounded by my crew, but it seems someone is occupying the spring. You’re making a mighty fine show of it, lass.” He raises his hands. “On my honor, I have seen nothing below those delicate shoulders of yours. Wouldn’t be proper.”

Emma rolls her eyes and starts floating toward her things while keeping an eye on him. He’s in nothing but his leathers and a long, dark shirt today that is open enough that it barely covers any of his chest. That’s not unusual, though, and she finds that her eyes linger at the dark patches of hair covering the strong muscle before they move up to the multitude of silver chains around his neck. Finally, though, they settle on the sharp, stubble-covered jaw and the white teeth showing in a smile that always makes her skin pebble up in gooseflesh.

One part of her wants to say that’s in a good way while the other is not so sure.

“Killian Jones, since when are you proper?”

He scoffs and places his hand on his chest, affronted. “I am always a gentleman, milady.”

“If you’re so much of a gentleman, why don’t you turn around and allow me to get dressed.”

“As you wish.”

“And don’t think I’m taking my eyes off of you for a second.”

He twists around and winks, the bastard. “I would despair if you did, but I promise to keep my eyes off of you, which is such a bloody shame.”

She has to bite her tongue. She doesn’t know if it’s to keep from laughing or scolding him, and since she seems to be at war with herself so much, she decides to keep her own mouth shut as she climbs out of the spring and moves to her clothes, pulling her shift down over her before dressing in more complete layers. The clothes cling to her wet skin, and her hair will take ages to brush through, but at least she’s no longer exposed to the elements and to Jones.  

She’s not a prude. Really, many around the village would call her a whore because she’s been in a man’s bed before marriage, but she’s not particularly interested in societal norms anymore. But she doesn’t have much of an interest in Killian Jones seeing her in the nude if it’s not on her terms.

Ruby would cheer her on for that thought. Granny would likely tell her to watch herself.

“You can turn around now.”

He makes a show of it, slowly turning and sauntering toward her, and when he’s standing but a few feet away, she gets a glimpse at overly blue eyes that she could swear he managed to steal from the sea.

“You cut quite the figure in that dress, Swan.”

“I’m not wearing a corset.” “I think it is apparent that you need not wear one.”

Emma rolls her eyes and reaches up to start braiding her hair. “So, when did you return to the Isles?”

“A few hours ago. I was planning on bringing the men to the tavern tonight. We had a successful voyage. Figured we all deserved a celebratory drink.” “There are other taverns.”

“Ah, but none with bar wenches as pretty as you.”

This time Emma can’t hold back her laughter, and even with her head tilted back to the sunlight, she knows that he’s smiling.

“I am not a bar wench, and you are not courting me.”

“Why ever not, love?” he asks with a wink. Even then, though, he steps closer to her, and she allows him to place his hand and his hook on her hip. This isn’t unfamiliar territory for them, and she knows herself enough to know that one day she’ll cave. Is it really caving when it’s what she wants? “I could court you. Believe it or not, I was taught how to properly court a woman. I simply believe my way is more thrilling.” “That’s because your way involves rum and sex.” “You forget the gambling.” Emma scoffs, and Killian leans in closer, dipping his head to her neck so that she can feel the softness of his lips and the slight scratch of his beard move against the sensitive cords of her neck.

Fuck, that feels good.

To think that at one time she would have never dared to utter that phrase nearly makes her giggle.

“How could I – however could I forget the gambling?” “Maybe you were distracted,” he teases as his teeth gently bite down before pulling away. Emma gasps before she can stop herself, and Killian’s chuckle is warm against her skin. “I have been told I can be a distracting man.”

“In your dreams.”

“Ah, well, you are indeed in my dreams.”

She allows him to trail his lips against her skin for a few minutes, letting the pleasure rumble over her and settle deep in her belly, but then the voices are back, telling her that she’s better than a pirate, that this isn’t proper.

She never did care much about proper. Why would she now?

“I’ll see you tonight,” Emma whispers as she pulls herself away, heart thumping. Killian’s cheeks are red, his chest heaving, and she knows if she looked down, his trousers would be tight. “I’ll find time to play cards with you, and you can tell me about your journey.”

“Your heart’s desire, Swan.”

And then she’s gathering all of her things and quickly moving away. By the time she’s out of the woods and back inside the perimeters of the village, she smells wood and salt, and she can’t decide if that is from the town or if it’s from Killian.

It’s been months since he’s been back. She doesn’t remember exactly when he left, but she always knows when the Jolly Roger is docked here. The tavern is usually the home to travelers and fisherman, but every few months, each bench and bed are filled with pirates. They may bring in a different type of man, but whenever they leave, Emma’s coin purse is always full from tips and Granny can afford to buy whatever materials she needs for upkeep.

They are all surprisingly well-behaved, but really, if one knows the captain, one knows that isn’t all that surprising at all. The man likes his rum and his card games, mostly because he keeps weighted dice and extra cards up his sleeve, and while a brawl or two does break out, it’s not what Emma thought to expect from a pirate.

“Pirates are no good, sweetheart,” her father once said as he paced back and forth in the library. “They come to our land and they plunder. They have been known to take women and ruin families. They threaten lives for gold. What could possibly be good about a pirate?”

What could be good about a pirate?

A part of her knows, but it’s her parents’ voices and their memory that keeps her from fully falling into finding out.

When she gets back to the tavern, Ruby is sitting in the corner on a bench with Graham, the two of them laughing at some private joke, and they don’t pay any attention to her as she sulks through and slips behind the bar and back into the kitchen where Granny is chopping up a few vegetables while water simmers over the fire.

“We’re going to be busy tonight,” Emma casually tells her, grabbing an apple. “I would get out the rum and whiskey.” Granny turns back to her and rises her brows. “How do you know that?” “I’ve heard a rumor the Jolly Roger is back.”

Granny puts her knife down and places her hands on her hips. “Did you hear a rumor, or have you seen that captain of yours already?”

Emma bites into the apple, and juices run down her face. “He is not mine.”

“Maybe not, but he’s sweet on you.” “And why is that a problem? Graham is being sweet on Ruby out there.”

“Graham is a respectable man.”

Emma opens her mouth to say that she knows for a fact that Graham isn’t quite as respectable with Ruby as Grammy thinks he is, but instead she takes another bite of her apple.

“Look,” Granny sighs, picking up her knife to cut her vegetables again, “you are a mature woman, and you are not my kin. But you also came here five years ago with a chest of expensive goods and not a lick of sense for how to live, so you cannot blame me for caring for you. That man is a sight for sore eyes, and if you want him to warm your bed over the next few weeks, I will not attempt to stop you. When he leaves, however, and he will leave, I don’t want to hear a word of melancholy out of you. Now help me cook dinner and then we’ll prepare for tonight, aye?”

Her parents would definitely be fond of Granny.

Emma helps cook and clean and knead the dough for the bread they’ll bake in the morning, and by the time the night falls and the tavern is lit by nothing more than candle and lantern light, every bench and barstool is full with the excess men leaning against walls and sitting on open window sills that allow the night breeze to waft in. None of them have had a moment to sit down or take a breath from constantly refilling drinks and serving food, and Emma’s feet are starting to ache from constantly standing. She should have had more time to soak them today during her bath, but there’s obviously something to be said about best laid plans being spoiled.

“You have an admirer,” Ruby tells her, nudging her shoulder. “I don’t think he’s been able to keep his eyes off of you all night.” “Yeah, well, we both know I’m his type. Look at all of the women surrounding him. He could easily pretend any of them are me.”

There’s a heaviness in the pit of Emma’s stomach when she looks over at Killian, at the way he commands his table with whatever tale he’s weaving and how the women bat their eyelashes at him and run their fingers over his shoulders.

“You are blind if you think any of them hold a candle to you, my dear. Why don’t you go talk to him, play a round of cards? It’s slowing down. If I need you, I can easily get you.”

“I don’t know, Rubes.”

“Why not? He’s handsome, he’s got a sense of humor, and he’s only ever here for a few weeks at a time. I know you’re not interested in a commitment. What else could you want?”

“I want,” she starts, but then she realizes she doesn’t know what to say. “I don’t know.”

Ruby sighs and turns to Emma, placing her hands on her shoulders and squeezing until Emma looks directly in Ruby’s eyes. “I don’t know who exactly you were before you came here, but I know you’re not someone who lets the opinion of others stop her from having a little fun. So don’t listen to my Granny. She doesn’t know what she’s talking about. And don’t listen to whatever part of you says you can’t be with him because he’s a pirate. It’s just a job, Emma. It’s illegal in some places and not the most clean cut in others, but nearly everyone who walks through here is doing something that’s a little…crooked.” “That’s one way to put it.”

“Go,” Ruby insists with a shake of her head. “Have a good time tonight, and if you hate it, which you won’t, I will not bother you at all. I swear of it.” “I will hold you to your word.” “I know you will.” Ruby moves her hands from Emma’s shoulders and then loosens the laces on the front of her dress, exposing the tops of her breasts. Leave it to Ruby to do that. “Enjoy your night, and if you’re fortunate, your morning too.”

Emma rolls her eyes, but she listens…after she drinks a small glass of rum herself.

Killian isn’t paying her any attention as she shuffles through the tavern and moves to the back of the room where he’s sitting. He’s shuffling a deck of cards with his hand when she walks up while muttering something to the women ogling him, but he does finally look up when she learns over the table.

“What are you boys playing?”

He blinks, slowly, and his lips tick up to the right while his tongue flickers out, running over his bottom lip. It’s a look she’s seen before, but it’s not one she’s allowed herself to fully appreciate it.

That’s a damn shame.

“Smee,” Killian calls out, slamming the cards down, “come and take my place in the game.”

“But Captain – ”

“Smee – ”

“Aye, sir. I will gladly take over.”

“You didn’t have to do that,” Emma chuckles. “I would have played with you.” “You would have lost,” he whispers as he stands and gets nearer to her. “It was rigged.”

Emma clicks her tongue. “I should have known.”

“Later, though, I might shuffle a new deck, and I give you my word that I will not keep any cards up my sleeve.”

“I make no such promise myself.”

He chuckles and dips his head until his lips brush against the shell of her ear. “Would you like to come back to my ship for a nightcap?”

Emma gulps.

“I don’t believe I can leave Ruby and Granny here alone when we have all of your crew.”

“Pity that. Still, have a drink with me. I did promise to tell you about my journeys.”

“That you did.”

They settle at a table in the corner of the tavern beneath one of the few closed windows. Ruby brings them a pitcher of ale and two small glasses, and before she walks away, she winks and makes a gesture that Emma hopes Killian ignored.

Or maybe she hopes that he saw it.

Emma does not know what she wants, truly, but she pushes down those thoughts and then downs a pewter of ale while Killian begins weaving a tale of his adventures. She can tell that he’s leaving parts out, that he’s curating this for her ears, and she tries to piece together the parts he is not sharing. He went to Misthaven, and she wants to know more.

How is it doing?

Are the people happy?

What about the flowers? Were any blooming despite the month?

Is there still a large rock with her name engraved in it sitting on the shore?

But why would he know any of that? He didn’t make the voyage there to quench her curiosity. He went to make a deal with another pirate captain, something about them both coming across an abandoned ship full of goods. She didn’t know pirate captains made deals like that. She thought they simply killed and attacked for what they wanted.

Then again, she’s starting to realize that maybe she doesn’t know anything about him past the rumors and few bits and pieces he’s shared over the years.

And yet she so readily lets him run his lips across her skin and was fully ready to share his bed tonight.

Emma sucks in a deep breath and slowly lets it out. Her heart is far from calm, and she suddenly can’t get enough air.

“Love,” Killian says, his thumb on her chin as he turns her attention back to him. “Are you quite alright, lass?”

Emma nods and swallows before plastering a fake smile on her face as her hand moves from her lap up to Killian’s hook, tracing along the metal. He watches her movements, and she knows she’s distracted him.

“I have a confession to make." 

"I find most women do."

“I want to know how you got the hook. You hear so many stories…”

“And what have you heard?” “Nothing that I don’t want to hear from you.”

His brows pinch together, but then he softens them while his lips stretch and she has a view of his pretty white teeth. “An enemy took it from me because he believed I took something of his.”

“Something more important than a hand?”

“More important, aye.” Blue eyes glance away before he leans in closer, his hand pressing down on her thigh. “If we’re sharing secrets, would you like to tell me how you became so educated? Or why your attention on me has increased when I was speaking about Misthaven?”

“I’ve read about it is all,” she lies. “My parents taught me to read. I was fortunate.”

“And where are these parents now? Do they know you’re associating with dirty pirate captains?”

“You bathed earlier.”

Killian tilts his head back with a big, booming laugh, and half of the tavern looks their way before he can contain himself and look directly at her, his eyes piercing. “I bathe quite frequently, but I don’t believe I could win the approval of any woman’s parents. So, where are Mum and Dad, love? Do I have to worry about dear old father want to chop off my other hand?”

“No, no you don’t.” A sob catches in Emma’s throat, and this time she can’t swallow it down. “What’d you take from your enemy?”

“That isn’t important for you to know.” “I want to know.” “Well, it’s none of your bloody business!” He picks up the jug of ale and takes a large swig directly from it, his throat bobbing as he swallows. “I think I best let you get back to work, sweetheart. I’m suddenly not in a mood for a night cap.”

He moves his hand of her thigh and reaches into his pocket before tossing a small purse onto the table. “For your trouble. Have a good night, Swan.”

And then he stands and walks away, coat swishing behind him until he disappears out the tavern door and into the darkness of night.

-/-

When the crew of the Jolly Roger comes into the tavern the next night, Emma lets Ruby deal with the Captain’s table. She feels Killian’s eyes on her the entire night, and she knows they’re a darker shade of blue than they usually are.

‘Tis no matter. If he wants to push her and wants her to talk but she can’t ask him questions, then they’ll stay at this stalemate. He’ll be gone soon enough, and he’ll be nothing but a distant memory until he comes back.

If he comes back.

She doesn’t need to be sharing her bed with him anyhow. It would be momentary pleasure only to be left and disappointed again. If she wants someone to sleep next to at night with no connection, there are plenty of other men in the village. She doesn’t need him.

So Emma lets him come and go as he pleases, serves him when she has to, sells jewelry to his crew on the days she works at the docks, and he seems to be choosing to mind his own business as well.

Good.

Days pass before they turn into weeks, and the sting when Emma sees him has dissipated to nothing but the smallest of aches, and he seems to be coming into the tavern less and less. Ruby and Granny have both mentioned it, but Emma has brushed them off, not wanting or needing to explain any piece of her life to them no matter how good they’ve been to her.

She is allowed her own bits of privacy.

Tonight she is taking that privacy by sweeping the alley outside of the tavern while Ruby, Graham, and Granny work inside. It’s unsurprisingly busy tonight. With spring sweeping in, warm weather has come too, and it has allowed the ocean breeze to settle into the air, leaving a warm salt. There’s no need for cloaks and gloves and several pairs of stockings, and Emma longs for the summer even more now.

“Where are you taking me, Captain?” Emma hears a woman giggle, and she sinks back against the building, her heart pounding as loud as horse hooves. “Are we going to your ship?”

“I’m giving you your coin, you will tell my crew I had a nice time should the question arise, and then you may go and enjoy your night.”

“I’m afraid I don’t understand.”

“I’m not going to sleep with you, lass,” Killian mutters, his hook flashing in the moonlight. “Have a good night.” “Why don’t you want me to share your bed tonight?”

“My reasons are my own. Question them at your own peril.”

And then he turns and walks away, his boots crunching on the gravel.

Emma can’t quite believe what she’s just seen, and she swallows the ever-present lump in her throat before pushing off the wall and dropping the broom against the door. Her curiosity is going to get the best of her because instead of returning to her work, she follows the sound of Killian’s footsteps and then his shadow as he returns to his ship. She’s likely not welcome, but that doesn’t stop her from watching him bark at a cabin boy before he walks through the doors to his quarters.

She hesitates, lingering on her toes, and maybe she’s being dull tonight, but she quietly sneaks aboard the Jolly, making sure none of the remaining crew spot her, before she follows in Killian’s footsteps and opens the door that will lead her to his cabin.

“Jim, I said I was not to be disturbed!”

“My name is not Jim.”

There’s a clatter and a curse, and when Emma is able to climb off the ladder, she can see Killian picking up a stack of books, still muttering to himself.

At least he isn’t cursing at her. She would deserve it for having walked onto his ship without him knowing.

“What the bloody hell do you think you’re doing here?”

“Curiosity,” she admits, taking in the small room filled with books and a small table, as well as a bed that looks more comfortable than hers at the tavern. He seems to have quite the collection of small goods, and her mind betrays her again by wanting to know where exactly he acquired each of them. “Frustration also. I don’t understand you, Killian Jones.”

“Not many people do. Few know me well enough to, and I don’t have most people call me by my name. Most use my more colorful moniker.”

“I like Killian better.”

He huffs and picks up a pewter cup, placing it on the table next to what looks like a map. Are these his plans for his next adventure?

“What are you frustrated about, Swan? Have I done something else to offend you? Pushed you too much? Gotten under your skin? Or are you here to pester me about my past once more?”

Emma shrugs and sits down at the edge of his bed, running her finger across the blanket. “My parents always warned me about pirates, you know?”

“I imagine most did.” “They said you were all despicable and dangerous and that I should never trust any of you.”

“You shouldn’t.”

She hums, more unconvinced now than ever before. “But there’s this weird thing about you that makes me trust you despite everything in my head telling me not to. Would I be wise to assume that you haven’t been a pirate for your entire life? You noticed that I was educated. I have noticed the same of you. The Navy perhaps? But how does someone who was educated in the Navy become a pirate?”

“How does someone who knows proper grammar and etiquette start work in a tavern? How old are you, Swan?”

“How old are you?”

“Thirty-two as of next month.”

“Twenty-six for me. In October.”

Killian clicks his tongue, and she snaps her head up to look at him. He’s not smiling, but he’s pleased. She can see the mirth in his eyes and the way the corner of his mouth twitches.

“You know,” he sighs, pulling the chair out from under the table. It screeches against the floor and then groans when he sits down. “I heard a rather peculiar tale when I was in Misthaven.”

“Did you?”

“Aye. You see, Misthaven has been under a new ruling for the past few years. It seems the King and Queen were killed while sailing to visit the court in Arendelle. Since the law had not passed for a woman to be able to take the throne without a King, the deceased King’s brother took the throne. It seems the princess had been unwilling to marry her suitor and ran away. It takes a clever lass to avoid that many palace guards.”

Emma nods and picks at a thread in his blanket, pretending not to care too much for his story even as her heart explodes within her chest.

He knows.

She knows that he does, that there’s no way he wouldn’t have figured it out, and maybe she should run away, should try to find some kind shelter. There has to be a reward out for her, and Killian may want it.

But if he did, he would have taken her already? He’s been here for weeks. He would have had his opportunities.

“It’s said she had hair made of gold and eyes made of emeralds, but to me, it almost seems that her hair is the color of sunshine and her eyes are comparable to only the ocean on a summer day. Wouldn’t you agree?”

She finally looks up, her lips parted to refute his assumption, but she finds that the words die on her tongue. Instead, she decides to ask another question entirely.

“How long have you known?”

“Since the moment I heard the tale last October. It was your birthday. They have a celebration in the village square.”

“If you knew how I was educated, why did you pester me about it back in the tavern? How is it fair that you know so much about my life and yet I know none of yours?”

“’Tis not fair. Nothing about life is.” Killian stands from the chair, its legs scraping against the wood again. He shrugs off his coat, his shirt underneath clinging to his muscles before it loosens. She can see the way his shoulders heave, the way he’s taking deep breaths, and he’s still turned away from her when he starts speaking. “I have no interest in reliving my past, but I will tell you these truths for the sake of good form. I was in the Navy until I was eighteen. My brother was killed because of our corrupt king, and I turned to piracy. Sometime later I met a woman who was my first love, but her husband took issue with this. He took my hand and since she wasn’t interested in being with a broken man, she went back to her husband. Is that everything you need to know?”

“Killian – ”

“Don’t,” he sighs, turning around with his face buried in his hand. “I don’t tell any of that for sympathy. I share because I should have ages ago. I don’t enjoy being on unequal footing with a woman I fancy, so the moment I figured out your past, I should have shared mine. It’s only right.”

“Thinking you’re on unequal footing is inane. This is not a game.”

He drops his hand and smiles halfheartedly. “No, I suppose it’s not.”

Neither of them speak next, silence lingering in between the two of them, and she keeps waiting for Killian to break the silence and fill the cabin with words. He doesn’t. And the longer it goes on, the more she thinks that the air gets thicker, heavier even.

The more she wonders how she’s even breathing.

“If you enjoy being on equal footing,” Emma finally begins, standing from the bed and sauntering toward Killian until she’s standing directly under his gaze and can smell the leather from his clothes, “then I must admit that I fancy you as well.”

He blinks, and she knows that the corner of his lips tick up.

Good.

“Aye?”

“Aye,” she whispers before pushing up her toes to glide her lips over his.

Emma has felt Killian’s lips on her before, but never like this. It was always on her skin somewhere, sometimes brief, sometimes not, but she has never actually kissed him. She’s never felt how the softness of his mouth mixes with her own or how his beard would feel rough rubbing against her chin. She’s never felt the warm swipe of his tongue or the way that he knows how to push and pull, how to give and take, and how to keep the pace slow, almost reverent when she was fully intending for this to turn into something that would have a fire burning so brightly in her belly that the entire ship would burn down.

That fire is definitely there, warming her, but she thinks she might be able to contain it if this pace continues.

Then again, this isn’t what she was expecting, and the gentleness of it all might make her lose her footing more than if they were to strip out of their clothes right now.

Killian pulls back first, but he doesn’t stray far. His forehead rests against hers, and his thumb has moves from her hair to her chin, his thumb resting in the indent so that she can feel the roughness of his skin and the cool, smooth texture of the metal making up his ring.

“I imagine your parents wouldn’t be too fond of you kissing a pirate.”

“I imagine not, but at some point, I think they would come around.” She leans into him again, brushing her lips over his as she speaks. “Tell me more about Killian Jones, the man. I’d like to know him outside of the view of everyone in the tavern.” “I’m afraid you won’t find him to be as adventurous.”

“Try me.”

Killian chuckles, kissing her once more, this time quick and dirty and absolutely breath-taking, and for a moment, Emma almost tugs him back into her and pulls him down on the bed, but she’s not ready. Now she knows more about him, now she knows something past the physical frustration and the sexual desire, and she finds that she wants to talk to someone who knows about her past but isn’t trying to push her and pull her back into that life.

He’s got a past too, one as colorful and heart wrenching, and she craves knowing more of it.

If he’ll let her.

Killian nods and tells Emma to sit down. She settles on his bed, pulling her knees to her chest and watching as he pulls a series of leather-bound journals out of the ornate cabinet carved into the ship. He doesn’t say anything, simply sitting down on a wooden chair and flipping through the pages, reading a few words to himself, turning the page once again, and then he settles on a passage.

“Today, I set foot in Misthaven for the first time in over a decade. The journey here was full of calm, fall waters, and while a chill nips at my nose, I cannot deny how beautiful this kingdom is. Evergreen trees spread across the ground as far as they eye can see, but then, in the blink of an eye, there are vast stretches of white sand that link to the sea. It reminds me of when I was a boy, of the way my mother would take us to the beach before she died, and though I am here for work, I wonder of the possibility of staying here on a more permanent basis.”

Killian looks up to her, blue eyes cast in a hazy shade of gray, and she swears his cheeks may be shaded in pink.

“Though,” he continues, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips, “I would be remiss to say that if I do not return to the Isles, I’ll never seen Emma Swan again. She’s fiery, that lass, and while I was first attracted to the curves that make up her body, I find that she is the only one who is not afraid to challenge me. I fancy that about her, even when she is yelling at me, and it would be a lie to say that I do not enjoy riling her up. Her cheeks turn pink, her lips press into a firm line, and then she shows me her wit that is purely unmatched.”

“You write about me in your journal?”

He doesn’t look at her. Instead he run his tongue against his teeth and flips through a few pages.

“With the information I’ve gathered today, I believe Swan to be the lost princes of Misthaven. This seems ludicrous, but I cannot turn my mind off to keep from thinking of this. The timeline, the description, the portraits of her in the village, all piece together. It is not my place to be intrusive, and while many would say that means I’ve gone soft, I cannot help but assume that she has run for a reason. She suffered a great loss, and as someone who has experienced many of those, I understand the urge to run. I live this life because of it.”

Emma studied anatomy in her schoolings, knows where each organ is supposed to be located, but she would be damned right now if her heart isn’t in her stomach, beating faster than it ever has while her throat constricts. Killian has obviously skipped over several pages and paragraphs in his journal, has not told her more than he has told her, but what he has told her is enough.

They understand each other, and maybe beneath the physical attraction, that has been there all along.

“Would you like to meet me by the river tomorrow?” Emma whispers as the ship rocks below them.

“Aye, love, I think I would.”

Killian meets her by the river a half hour pass noon the next day. The sun is beaming down on them, a gentle breeze whistling between the trees, and while the two of them share more than they have in the past, it is still but a bird pecking at the shallows. That changes, however, as more days come to pass. During the day, the two of them meet by the river, exchanging slow, lingering kisses that sometimes stay that way and other times leaver her entire body flushing, and at night, he comes to the tavern. There, life is almost as normal as it always is. He sits at his preferred table with his crew, women often trying to gain his attention, and while they are always unsuccessful, there’s a feeling of being unsettled that comes with it.

He has a reputation to uphold, and really, who is she to ruin that for him?

Captain Hook is who the world knows.

Killian Jones is who she is getting to know.

And as the spring melts into summer, that is who she is falling for in a way that she never allowed herself to expect.  

“Swan,” Killian whispers against the back of her neck, his breath warm as it ghosts over the expanse of her bare skin.

She shifts back into him, dragging her foot along the warm skin of his calf as he presses into her so that she can feel the rise and fall of his chest and the hard planes of a sea-worn body.

“Mhm,” Emma mumbles, tugging on his hand that is lying flat against her stomach.

“I’m afraid I have some news to share with you.”

The words do not truly settle in her mind. Instead, they stay on the outskirts, waiting and wanting to get in and settle, but her sated body and tired mind don’t allow that.

“And what’s that?”

“I received a letter a few days prior from an old acquaintance who says he has news of my old king once more trying to get his hands on the poison that killed Liam. I cannot let that happen, my love. He could kill thousands, and my men are getting restless. They need to be back on the sea before I have mutiny on my hands.”

Emma blinks and swallows while her stomach swirls, the words Killian is saying finally settling in her mind.

He’s leaving.

That is what Killian is trying to tell her, and she so wishes that she could fall back asleep and not hear any of it.

She knew this would happen, but she had allowed herself to feel comfortable, content even.

Emma had allowed herself to feel love despite knowing that it can be gone in the blink of an eye.

After her parents’ deaths and after many of her courtships in her youth, Emma always believed love to be fleeting, but in actuality, it is not. It seems that it takes no time at all to fall in the kind of love that would take a lifetime to get past, and she has allowed herself to do just that.

Stupid, stupid girl.

Emma makes an attempt to steady her breathing, to someone convince Killian that she has fallen asleep once more, but she knows that he doesn’t believe her when his lips press against her shoulder once more.

“I am a pirate, my love,” he whispers into her skin. “Tis the life I have chosen, and for now, I cannot settle down in one place. In the future, I am open to every possibility, but for now, I must go. Would I be a fool to ask you to come with me? I can show you a way of the world that you did not get as a child, and if you want, we can venture to Misthaven under the cover of the night and cloaks of disguise so you can be home once more.”

Emma opens her eyes again and takes in the soft glow of the candles still burning and the moonlight shining through the windows, a mix of a golden and silver glow, and she allows herself to imagine what leaving her safe haven would be like.

What going home would feel like even if that place is no longer hers.

“But it is your choice,” he continues, each word vibrating against her skin. “Everything is up to you, and if you choose to stay, know that I will count down every minute until I can get back to you.”

Nodding, Emma squeezes Killian’s hand once more. “How much time do I have to make my decision?”

“I will not leave until you have.”

She does not know what to say or how to put her thoughts into words, and while they are pressed together so that she can feel every inch of him, that is not nearly enough. So she glides their hands downward and shifts her leg back, hooking it over Killian’s calf, and he easily takes the hint, slowly touching her in a way that has her heart racing as his lips trail along her back and her shoulder, breathing her in as she does the same to him. The ship rocks gently below them in a soothing motion that Emma has grown to love, and the slowness of the ocean sets the slowness of their pace.

A gradual building that goes higher and higher and higher with each deft movement of Killian’s hand.

But then his hand is replaced, and he slides into her in a long, slow motion, heat radiating across her skin as he fills her. It’s familiar by now, and while she will admit that it is not always thrilling, there are times like this where she cannot imagine any other feeling beside being joined with him in the early morning hours.

The pace stays the same, sometimes slowing when Emma twists her neck to capture Killian’s mouth with hers, and she lingers in living on the edge of falling over, wanting to be there but being content to wait. She’s never liked waiting for much, especially good things, but with Killian, she’s found that waiting is always with it.

Waiting for him to flirt with her, waiting for him to be honest about who he is, waiting for him to come to the tavern, waiting for him to share his past, waiting for him to turn up in the markets with her favorite dessert when she thought he was working, waiting for him to fall in love…

And the thing that always gets her is that yes, she has bided her time and waited for him in certain aspects, but she has not sat idle. She has done her job, has spent time with those closest to her, has done things that she’s wanted to do. So much of her life was controlled, and she’s not yet done with experiencing the freedom of being the only person who has any right to tell her what to do. She may have been raised to wait for a man because he makes the final decisions, but that is not the life she is living now.

Heaven knows, she has made Killian wait for her as well.

Likely far more than she has ever waited for him.

And he is not making any decisions for her. That is all up to her.

Now, though, as Killian’s hand inches to where they’re joined, his fingers working what can only be considered magic, she knows that she is no longer waiting to fall over the edge into the bliss that leaves her warm and sated almost every time.

They do not move afterward. They do not speak either. Instead, they stay pressed together under the blankets in Killian’s cabin, and when they are ready again, they once again join together. This time is not slow. It’s hard and fast, and Emma can scarcely breathe as she holds on in desperation knowing that this could be the last time for a long time.

If not forever.

She wakes not remembering having fallen asleep, and she immediately knows she’s not sharing the bed with anyone else. The mattress is not nearly warm enough for Killian to still be here. When she blinks open her eyes, she sees him standing next to his dresser. He’s not yet clothed, but she watches as a finishes attaching his brace for his hook and then slips on one of his shirts, this one long and billowy and the darkest shade of black she’s ever seen. He doesn’t button the top, leaving his chest on display, and she finds that she can’t look away from him as he tugs up his trousers and tucks in the blouse before putting on his necklaces and rings on. Emma has grown so used to seeing a variation of his clothing nearly every day, of watching him methodically get dressed and then sit down over his logs, the official ones, not the ones where he writes about her, that she cannot quite imagine the day where she is not here to witness these every day moments that are the most ordinary she has ever had.

After a life filled with extravagant and extraordinary, Emma imagines that the thrill that runs down her spine at the thought of having her own normal is greater than any thrill she’s ever possessed before.

“Ah, good morning, my love,” Killian sighs when he sees her. He tugs one last lace on his leathers before sauntering toward her and leaning down to kiss her. He tastes of mint already, and she finds herself smiling about it. “Should I call to the kitchen to get you breakfast, or will you be joining the crew there?”

“Where are you off to?”

“First, to eat,” he smiles, scratching behind his ear before brushing his hair off his forehead. “Then I have preparations to arrange before we depart. Tonight, though, I am all yours, however you want me.” “Captain, that is quite the dangerous position you’re giving me,” Emma laughs before letting the blankets fall around her as she stands and walks to the wardrobe to grab one of Killian’s shirts. “However I want you?”

“Anything for you, milady.”

Emma shakes her head and then turns back around to him, pressing up on her toes in order to wrap her arms around his neck and brush her lips over his mouth as she speaks. “I want to go with you.”

“Swan – ”

“Don’t protest,” she whispers as his hand and his hook settle at her hips. “You asked me, and I’m agreeing. I don’t know if I’ll want to go to Misthaven, but I do know that I am ready for a new adventure with you, whatever that may be.”

-/-

-/-

one-shot tag list (you can be added or removed with absolutely no problem): 

@mrtinski​ @klynn-stormz​ @jonirobinson64​ @snowbellewells​ @therealstartraveller776​ @thejollyroger-writer​ @sherifemma​ @shardminds​ @captainsjedi​ @galaxyzxstark​ @galadriel26​ @idristardis​ @karenfrommisthaven​ @teamhook​ @spartanguard​ @searchingwardrobes​ @itsfabianadocarmo​ @jamif​ @shireness-says​ @ultimiflos​ @nikkiemms​ @resident-of-storybrooke​ @onepunintendid​ @bluewildcatfanatic​ @killianswannn​ @carpedzem​ @captainkillianswanjones​ @mayquita​ @jennjenn615​ @onceuponaprincessworld​ @a-faekindagirl​ @scientificapricot​ @scarletslippers​ @xellewoods​ @ultraluckycatnd​ @stahlop​ @kmomof4​ @tiganasummertree​ @singersdd​ @tornadoamy​ @cluttermind​

#playing the waiting game #cs fic #cs ff #cs fanfic #captain swan fic #captain swan ff #captain swan fanfic #captain swan

[pyrrhesia]

FF14 Write - ‘Destruct’

In which Ysabet Sable puts her pride aside.

The forest canopy hummed with life. Songbirds boomed out their mating cries, the autumn-fall of leaves drifted to the floor, and underneath it all, the whispers of viera footfall glided unnoticed through the chaos. All that drew attention to them was the brewing argument between the three figures. Viera remained alike the other warmblooded races in a few aspects, not  least the fact that any trio of adolescents could immediately be carved into three archetypes: the brash one, the clever one, and the one who ensured the three would actually make it to adulthood. Even if they did not fit these roles alone, any group of three would slide into the same, time-honoured dynamics. The tallest one, Kjva, represented the first archetype; given this, it was an ill sign she was the one carrying the bow. "You're fretting for nothing, Thrjs. The beast is old and slow." "So let it die!" Thrjs argued. "If it represented a threat unaccosted, the hunters would act. You'll only to madden the beast." "And risk it preying on helpless foragers? What do you think, Mrdja?" The third of the crew shrugged. "I'm here, am I not?" "There, a vote of confidence!" "Besides, you'll need someone to pry you out of the thing's maw when it has you." Mrdja grinned. "This is a terrible idea, Kjva, and you are an idiot. But you are my idiot, and life would be dull without you." "Mrdja, you're as bad as her!" Thrjs despaired. "Sh!" Kjva gestured frantically to the others. "I've found the beast's tracks." Silence lasted almost a full second. "Don't sound so pleased with yourself," said Mrdja. "They're the size of tree-trunks." "Tracks as wide as trees, and we're going to follow it," said Thrjs, rolling her eyes. "Idiots the both of you." It did not take them long to catch up. The beast was slow, lumbering through the woods with all the grace of a light-drunk moth slamming into a window. It had uprooted a number of trees on its trail of carnage, and, judging by master tracker Kjva's evaluation of a massive haemorrhage in the middle of its path, had probably eaten recently. They found it in a clearing, outside a cave. A great, slavering canine creature, dragging a deer carcass in its maw. It dropped the carcass outside its lair, and a few pups came bounding out eagerly, worrying at the remnants. Mrdja marvelled. "The size of the thing... !" Its work done, the patriarch shifted over towards a maggot-ravaged corpse, a smaller mirror in duller colours. It licked it a couple of times - Thrjs gagged - before almost mournfully seeming to sit by its side. "A hyur arrow through its throat," Kjva said, softly. "That must be the mate. No wonder the beast went feral." Thrjs turned to her. "Well, master archer, I doubt even you could miss that thing. Care to take your mark? I promise to clap when it's over with." Kjva re-evaluated the task, and her bravado in relation to it. "Uh," she said. "What was that you were saying earlier about heroes, Kj?" Thrjs never could resist twisting a knife. "Let's just go--" She took the first step, tugging Kjva's sleeve, and stepped on a thin, dry branch which snapped underfoot. The beast turned, and reared up. The three of them stood petrified for a moment, before instinct took over. Kjva nocked and drew the arrow in a single fluid motion, but as the beast lumbered towards the three of them, her heart raced and threw off her aim as she let fly. The arrow sank into one of the pups, which whined and scattered into the woods. The beast bellowed a roar which shook the woods. The three young viera bolted, all thoughts of glory gone, the only thought on their mind getting back to Camoa, not daring to look behind them but hearing the thundering of paws, the trees in their way being bulldozed aside, and Mrdja stumbled on a rock and fell heavily on her ankle, cried out, shut her eyes and waited for death. There was a silken sound, and the rush of air overhead as a volley of arrows struck their mark, tearing through flesh. The beast gave out a final, defiant roar... before collapsing with what seemed almost like a sigh. Mrdja opened her eyes. Grim-faced figures slipped away from the shadows, surveying the scene. A familiar voice cut through. "Idiot!" shouted Irsa, Kjva's mentor, pushing through her companions to loom in the time-honoured 'I'm so glad you're alive but you are in so much shit' posture adopted by all adults at one time or another. Kjva bowed her head in shame. "We wanted to be of use to our people." "Be of use by staying alive, you stupid girl! Seven years I've taught you, barely even a start to your training, and you want to throw it all away? Selfish idiot!" There was just one course of action remaining to Kjva. She burst into tears. Irsa gritted her teeth, clenched her fists, performatively huffed before finally enveloping the girl in a hug. "Just don't scare me like that again..." Thrjs stepped forward, felt it was time to claim her credit points as The Good Influence. "I told her it was madness! I told them both, but Mrdja just kept egging her on, just because she wants to kiss her, everyone knows it--" Irsa glared at Thrjs. "Yet did you stop them? Or did you just want to crow over the bodies of your dead friends?" Thrjs looked stricken, but had no answer. But Mrdja was still dreadfully pale. "We committed a crime against the wood," she murmured, eyes locked on the corpse of the beast. Irsa cocked her head. "It was old, feral, without a mate. Its part in the cycle was over. It was not your role to end its life, but this in itself is no tragedy." From the cover of her arms, Kjva glared with sudden don't-you-dare hatred. It was too big a secret to keep, even for her sake. "Kjva's shot missed. She struck a pup." The other hunters glanced among each other. That was a different matter. "But..." Mrdja rallied. No, she could still fix all this! "I can make this right!" "Mrdja, no--" "No, I can! Ljda's taught me well! Let me make atonement, I beg you!" And she turned and slipped off into the woods before anyone could stop her.

It had not made it far from the cave. Mrdja followed the trail of blood until she found the pup, shivering and whimpering, coiled up under a tree. The shot had taken it through the shoulder and throat. Mrdja clicked her tongue. It was a grievous wound, and simply pulling the arrow free would push the pitiful creature over the edge. It struggled at first under her hands, but lacked the strength to resist. "Calm, now," she murmured. "It will be alright." Mrdja kneeled by the pup for hours as the sun set, ministering to its wounds, her fingers stroking its soft, downy fur and letting her meagre stores of aether seep into the wound. It whined softly as she broke off the broadleaf arrowhead, trying to prise it free as slowly and as gently as she could, not even noticing the pup lash out with its claws and tear a bloody score in her arm, her energy focused on mending its wounds as she went... before, at last, pulling the thing free. It mewled, wretchedly. Mrdja held it down firmly with one hand, fumbling for her poultice and bandages with the other. Her ministrations did not stop when it cried out one final time. They did not stop when it went still. "Mrdja." "I can still save it," she muttered. "Mrdja." Firmer, this time, and accompanied by a hand on her shoulder. Mrdja squirmed violently away from it, turning to face the new arrival as she still protectively clutched the pup in her hands. Her mentor stood, watching her impassively, leaning on an old, gnarled staff. "It's over, girl," she said, not unkind but certainly final. Mrdja pushed back, a rush of anger boiling over. "You don't believe in me? After seven years your student! Have I not shown you--" Ljda tutted. "Seven years my student and you still can't see its heart stopped minutes ago." Mrdja's mouth opened and shut, but the words wouldn't come. Ljda supplied them for her. "I know you did what you could. You found a dying creature that would have succumbed in minutes and drew its suffering over a matter of hours." "That isn't fair!" Mrdja said, the words sounding hollow the moment . "I... I tried everything I knew..." Ljda took a deep breath. "No. It wasn't fair to the poor creature that your pride blinded you to the truth." Mrdja blinked, her eyes damp. The weight in her hands felt so horribly light. "You should have said something," she said, thickly. "How long were you there? And you just let this happen?" The old viera smiled, sadly. "I will not always be there to guide you, you know. Not because I plan to die," she added, seeing her student look panicked. "Because of you. Already, I can see your eyes casting beyond the forest. I suspect there is an itch you cannot quite resolve in Camoa. So I must prepare you for the world, proud little Mrdja, and if you are to call yourself a healer, there are things you must know. What if I had told you, hm? Can you really say you would not think to yourself, you knew better than your Ljda? This way you know. Deep in your bones, I think." They buried the pup under the tree.

Several generations later, by Eorzean reckoning, the aftermath of battle proved no respite for Ysabet Sable. Her cuirass was dented a thousand ways, cuts on her cheek and thigh had scabbed over, and she was acutely aware she was fortunate to still be standing. More than anything she wanted to sit, or better, to sleep. To find some respite amidst the chaos. Yet she still had the privilege of her strength, and a way to make a difference. The indulgence of rest would cost lives that could still be snatched from the brink of death. "Hey! You!" Ysabet was not accustomed to being a 'hey you', but too tired to argue. Wearily, she looked over her shoulder, saw two partisans dragging a comrade between their shoulders. The man was unnaturally pale, his coat closed tight with a dark, sodden patch around his midriff. His head lolled, trying to put Ysabet in focus. He tried to speak. "Just rest, Garwyn," soothed the other partisan. "You'll be alright." "The fucking tree-shaggers are holding out on us!" fumed the first. "Talking about the will of the elements. How about our fucking will to string 'em up, eh? But I heard some say you were some kind of a witch!" "Hush," said Ysabet, firmly. She glanced at the man. She remembered, to her bones. This was no time for pride. "Lay him on the slab, then give me space." The Ala Mhigans rested Garwyn down. Ysabet did not need to open the coat to see the wound. The smell told her everything. "Leave us," she commanded. "You'll save him, right?" "I will do there is to be done. Go do what you can for some others." The tent-flap rustled as they stepped away. Ysabet hissed out a breath between her teeth, pinched her temple. She was so dry of energy, but even with a day's rest and three square meals there would be nothing to do but this. She placed two of her fingers on Garwyn's temple. His mouth opened, but could not shut, as failing eyes cast about looking for a focus. Ysabet leaned in close. "Just rest your eyes, now," she said, softly. "Your pain is too great to be borne. I will free you of its burden."

#FFxivWrite2021 #destruct #OC: ysabet sable #cw: animal death

[danddymaro]

A Dance Just For Two | PT.2

Previous : Just You

Word count : 2761

Pt. 2: Marshmallows

It was late by the time they had arrived home, actually a smidge past midnight.

So, of course, neither of the two would have expected to run into anyone. 

As far as (f/n) was aware of, Natasha was away on assignment.

 It was one she didn’t bother to disclose too much information on, which wasn't too much out of the ordinary because Nat never really revealed too much about where she was going, or what she’d do when she left.

It was always confidential, and everyone knew to not ask.

The redhead had left two days prior on a starless night, dressed in her form-fitting black uniform, leaving with nothing more than what was on her. 

And though she was strict about what she’d reveal about her missions, she did, however, offer a small smile, along with her goodbye as she usually did.

Clint Barton had long left, announcing his retirement with a tired and half-hearted smile following up the battle in Sokovia. Prioritizing his family was beyond anything else, and seeing the growing team, he decided it was a good moment to part ways.

And hell, (f/n) couldn't blame him, because if she had a family herself, she’d pick them over everything else in the world.

Bruce Banner was still MIA, his whereabouts being a mystery to everyone, and worry ensued for him.

He was a kind man with a heavy curse, one he had no control of, and the (h/c) haired young woman could only hope he found his way back soon, returning back home safe and sound. But for the moment, it seemed that he didn’t want to be found and it was clear as day.

It was also plainly obvious that his departure had its effect on a certain member, 

‘That’s probably why she keeps herself so busy now...’ (f/n) thought to herself with a touch of sadness.

Thor had also decided to part ways, his face filled with conflict as he bid his farewell, seeming to have too much on his mind to express.

Up to date, he hadn’t sent word back, and she wished there was a way to reach him, just to know if he was alright out there. (f/n) couldn’t even begin to imagine what things lay beyond the earth, what other threats the thunder god took care of alone. 

She could only hope that whatever dangers he encountered, they were no match for his might.

Wanda Maximoff had become an official member of the Avengers not long after the battle in Sokovia.

She grieved over the loss of her only kin, her hands empty as she realized she had nothing more left because everything she cared for had been there at her side until his final breath, bloodied on the battlefield.

However, Clint Barton assured her she had a place, that she could pull through because her young life was filled with promise. 

Every day since then, the young woman worked tirelessly to gain more control of her strange powers, learning ways to expand the manipulation of them she had access to.

Vision, who had also become a member after the events aided her, the two becoming a close pair soon after, an obvious attachment grown between them during the duration of time.

They went together like youth and inexperience, and in a sense, they represented the two sides perfectly.

The artificial being, though not requiring rest, would often partake in the falls of slumber, most often times around 10, finding it to be a reasonable hour, whereas Wanda was a toss between ten or three, with no real indicator to which she would lean to.

Either way, she stayed in her quarters, unbothered by the world outside.

Tony, of course, was someone else who stayed up late quite often, stuck in his laboratory doing things (f/n) would never come to understand because to put it plainly, she wasn't a whiz kid like he was. He stayed locked in the wide space, a dark roast of hot beverage chugged down excessively with frequency.

Heck, the man lived on coffee.

But she knew well enough it wasn't just the drink that had him up, it was much more that would haunt him, leaving him restless at night.

What was much more to leave him awake: Pepper’s absence.

What solace he’d find at her side at night went missing as she left.

“ A small business trip,” she said, to which everyone believed.

But then she didn’t return to the home, nor was she frequently shown at Stark's side like before.

She was still active as CEO of his company, something he’d never take from her, because all in all, she earned it. She was his successor despite any strain in their relationship, and (f/n) found it fitting.

(f/n) was close to Tony Stark, having grown a mutual fondness at first that grew into genuine feelings of love. And while she was certain they could speak about anything, Tony was someone that didn’t like bothering people with his own problems too.

Similar to her, he felt like a burden while opening his heart.

‘It would be nice if we could all just let go,’ She mused, ‘Let go of all the feelings that anchor us.’ She added, knowing that all of them had something that weighed them down.

Side glancing at the blonde beside her, (f/n) smiled softly, ‘ Would I be happier if I let you go?’ She wondered.

‘Or can I actually find a way to reach you, reaching happiness that way?’

The gentle warmth of the spacious room then spread all around her, smoothing her like a fluffy blanket, bringing her instant comfort, to the point of making a small moan of delight leave her to show her contentment.

Needless to say, it felt good to be home, and when she said that there was no place like home, she truly meant it. 

There truly was absolutely no place like the Avengers facility, and she would go so far as to admit that it was far better than the tower they had previously gathered within.

‘It’s perfect,’ she thought gleefully as a sweet, creamy scent wafted towards her, tickling her nose and making her mouth moist with desire for the teasing, traveling aroma, even if she wasn't quite sure what it was.

She couldn't pinpoint it, but it was somewhere there on the tip of her tongue, moreover, it made her feel giddy for some reason. 

And hidden in the background, being outshined by the visiting smell was a smokey wild cherry that was more recognizable and well known throughout the place.

The crisp “snip-snap” cracking sounds of the blazing fire in the room caught her attention, causing her to pull up a soft smile at the view, knowing that the lovely display was out again, spreading out warmth as well as the sweet, welcoming scent of Cherrywood.

‘Tony really outdoes himself.’ she thought to herself, gazing at the flames with fascination, watching the Amber-colored heat dance in mellow movements.

Though Stark might find improvement in the place, always running through the rest of the crew with new ideas, she thought the building in its entirety was just fine, perfect even.

She wasn't sure about everyone else, but that’s how she felt at least.

She felt that nothing needed to change as It felt like a true home, packed with people she loved.

Isn’t that what made home, well, home?

Love..?

As she swam in that thought, one particular man set himself off from the rest, just as he always did. 

Her (e/c) colored eyes peeked over to the said man to find him engrossed within the sight of the soothing fire, caught in thought, just as she had been a moment ago.

With sincere admittance, she'd have given anything to know what he was thinking, and what was much more, know if there was a part of his pondering that was about her.

The smile gracing his face as he watched the flames dance made her feel warm fuzz all over as she continued to observe him, the slightly dimmed lighting doing nothing but accenting the lovely edges of his features.

As if he wasn’t astonishingly handsome already.

“ looks real doesn’t it?” she commented, her voice sweet-sounding and soft as she airily spoke, making him turn his attention to her, snapping out of his light daze with her simple question.

 “I was just thinking that.” he said shaking his head. “ looks like someone lit a fire behind a glass window. And then the smell... it’s hard to believe it’s not real,” he added. “ Technology has gotten pretty crazy, I would have never imagined sitting down and warming up next to an imitation fireplace this realistic.” He admitted.

“I mean, yeah we had these, but not as convincing,” he explained.

“It's scary isn't it old man...” she said wiggling her fingers in front of him. “Technology is so scary,” she said adding tremor to her voice, continuing to giggle with glee as he stared at her flatly.

Raising an eyebrow at her with a teasing smirk growing, he waited for her to calm down more before speaking,

“ Oh...aren't you the one paranoid about that little movie?” he asked her, “ what was it...” he muttered to himself, humming, his right hand taking a light hold of his chin. “ Ah, Wall-e right? Robots are gonna take over the world and control it, right?” he asked her and she stopped laughing, piping down.

“ That was a kid's movie and you were paranoid about something like that, ” he said poking her cheek. “ So, I guess, technology is scary, ohhhh…” he said mimicking her earlier actions, taunting her with the same childish actions as she stared at him with a halfhearted glare.

“That wasn’t exactly it,” she told him.

Sure that little film gave her anxiety, but not for that very reason, 

“ Besides, if we're talking about that... I wasn't so far off…” she grumbled, referring to the incident with the ‘peacekeeper’ Ultron.

The entire ordeal had been a complete nightmare for her.

While, of course, Large, menacing, reptilian-like aliens would be something to fear, nothing really took the top off as much as psycho killer robots, but that was just her opinion.

She began to nibble on her left thumb’s nail as she recalled the event, all with a cold shiver.

“- Quit sucking your thumb,” Steve chided, chuckling as she instantly brought the entire hand down, her hand fisted to her side as she glared at him. 

“I wasn’t sucking on it!” she said with a short hiss as an exaggeration to the ‘s’ sound.

Ready to challenge her, Steve opened his mouth to speak, stopped by another masculine voice, 

“ Well, well, well, having fun alone you two?” Bucky said teasingly, finally catching the other two’s attention.

“Don't you two know how late it is?” he chided tisking, adding on a small chuckle.

His attention was trained over the counter as his back faced both (f/n) and Steve, not letting them see his true, troubled face.

“-Jealous?” Steve said raising a brow, quirking up a partial smile, mindlessly teasing his friend.

“Maybe…” Bucky huffed, “ I wasn't invited out after all.” Bucky replied bitterly.

“You know, my two friends decided to hang out without me.” he sighed, “ How could I not be?”

“ We were just out for a stroll,” (f/n) said rolling her eyes, “You're such a drama queen,” she added playfully.

In response, he hummed and turned around with two mugs of a hot beverage, pursing his lips as he looked off to the side, “I always have a comeback at hand,” he warned her, “ But being the grown-up here, I’ll keep them to myself,” he said while walking towards the two.

He then handed each of them their own cups, going back to retrieve his own.

Curious, she gazed down to see her kitty mug filled with hot cocoa, brimmed with small marshmallows.

With eagerness, she smelled the sweet aroma up close,

“ Oh, Hot cocoa ! “ she chirped joyously, giving the man a closed eye smile, absolutely joy-filled.

‘That’s what that smell was,’ She mused, 'It was right there,' She added, having been bothered by the fact that she couldn't name it off the bat, and by then feeling silly for not recognizing it.

Bucky’s smile broadened as he nodded while seeing her obvious excitement,

 “Yeah, I thought you guys would want some,” he told them. “ It's starting to get real chilly out there.” He pouted, not liking the cold.

He wasn't really a fan.

“Ohh, you even put the tiny marshmallows on it, “(f/n) muttered, “Whoa, A whole bunch of them,” she added with a grin, all while looking within the cup.

“Just how you like it, I remembered,” Bucky replied, watching her face bloom with happiness.

“Love you Buck, You’re the best,” she said looking up towards him in gratitude before she started to blow on her drink.

“ I only got two,” Steve said staring down at his hot chocolate, plainly glaring at it with a disappointed pout, because he couldn't help but feel robbed.

“There wasn't much to work with,” Bucky said shrugging, the words accompanied by a nervous laugh.

 “That’s all we had, I swear,” He added.

“Yeah, I bet,” Steve argued back flatly, “After you practically chucked the entire bag into (f/n)’s cup, you didn't have any left, right?” Steve replied with accusation.

(f/n)’s face heated up, taking a look at both cups with embarrassment.

“ I'm sorry Steve !” she said immediately. “ We can switch if you want,” she said frantically,

“Or I can just-”

Both men stared at her with amusement, Bucky being the first to laugh, shaking his head as he spoke,

“That’s cute,” he muttered.

“ Its alright doll, no need,” Steve said shaking his head. “I'm just teasing!” he exclaimed, calming her down. “Seriously,” he added.

 “ I wouldn't get so worked up over some marshmallows,” he assured her.

“And Besides, I know Bucky here made that especially for you,” he said smiling knowingly with a grin, denying taking any contents from the cup in her hands as he lifted up his free hand in a stopping motion.

“He likes to play favorites between the two of us. I’ve gotten used to it anyway,” he added.

“I’m sure he doesn’t,” (f/n) said sheepishly, not believing him.

“No, I do,” Barnes said with certainty, his upfront admittance making her keep her eyes down to her drink,

‘Oh Bucky,’ She thought with a smile, shaking her head at his response, not sure if he meant it, or said it just to be a tease.

After taking a sip, she looked back towards Bucky, her eyes full of gratitude and amusement,

“At least you made some for yourself, “ she said with relief to which he shook his head,

“Nah,” he replied, making her stop drinking.

“ You didn’t make some for yourself?" She asked him, and shaking his head again, he answered her, “Nah, but it's fine.” He said with a dismissive wave.

“But wait what’s that in your hand,” she asked, pointing her finger towards his cup.

“Water,” he replied, “ I only realized afterward that I only made enough for two, but again, it’s fine,” He assured her, putting it down on the closest surface to him.

“Oh Bucky,” she said sighing, walking closer to him and leaving Steve's side altogether.

She took one of his hands, the warm flesh one, raising it up to touch the steamy mug in her hand. She pressed it there beneath hers as she gave him a small smile. “ Here, “ she told him, her hold loosening to let him take hold of the drink.

“But It’s for you,” he reminded her, being quick to return it, doing the same as she had by holding her hand to the mug,

“Really,” he said sweetly, begging her with his eyes.

" Half and half ?" She suggested, not willing to let it go.

"That's the closest I'm getting to winning, huh?" He asked her with defeat, and nodding (f/n) agreed, "Pretty much," she said, having gone unbeaten up to date, getting the last say.

'Only because it's you.

Only because you're so sweet.

Only because I love you so damn much,' The dark-haired man thought with a soft smile.

Bucky caved, the three people enjoying the warm drink as they talked, letting the night take its course.

Next : Little Smooch

#bucky x reader x steve #steve x reader x bucky #MCU #mcu fanfic #Marvel MCU #MCU fanfiction #marvel #marvel crush #marvel cinematic universe #marvel fanfic #marvel fanfiction #Steve Rogers #steve #captain america steve rogers #steve rogers fanfiction #steve x reader #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x reader insert #captain america #captain america fanfic #captain america fanfiction #The Avengers #The avengers fanfiction #The Avengers fanfic #the avengers x reader #bucky #Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barns fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfiction

[captainkurosolaire]

金 LFRP - Captain Kuro Solaire (Updated 5/2/21)

NAME: Captain Kuro Solaire AGE: 37 (Appears 29) - (’Relic Cursed’ Immortal, not Invincible.) RACE: Seeker of the Sun, Miqo’te GENDER: Male SEXUALITY: Gynephilla, Dom MARITAL STATUS: Poly SERVER: Crystal

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE ––––

HAIR: A slick jet black texture, Kuro’s hair is majority of the time unkempt with downward spikes often cascading across sometimes when grown-out it’s placed in a bandana and combed on the sides. Under rare occurrences the length of his hair can be lower then his shoulders and without being straightened leaving a shaggy and feral look. Often sporting an accompanied goatee through more veteran experience and grizzly age has extended that further with a stubble to boot and long sideburns.

EYES: One eye is often left visible with an amber tint. (Typically while the other eye lays remained behind an eye-patch for a particular reason that is usually left in speculation to other onlookers.)

HEIGHT: 6 fulms, 0 ilms. 

BUILD: (Trains and adjusts his mass depending on situation or if injured.) Typically built like an ultimate fighter (ref) 

DISTINGUISHING MARKS: Scattered scars from a gash hidden underneath a leather collar from his first defeat and near end. To followed historical injuries to dragon claws swiped across his hip to rib nearing his chiseled abs, to lance wounds on his pec, bite-mark from a fanged creature adorned on his shoulder. Scratch marks from passion on his back. To matching fiendish talons shredding the opposing side of his rib-cage. With a gashed-cut draped across his right-eye. Lastly an X incision on his chest crossing over his upper-torso and halting near his shoulders to his pecs. -- Additionally donned the cheek scar of his first that he had cast away due to old insecurity and trauma which was resolved. He’s got a tattoo on his forearm of runic engravings with summoner lettering’s that seem to be serving as a seal. Compass on his left-hand to prevent him losing memories of being a sailor that points in all four-directions. The south-seas etched above crossing over his bicep. Behind his back is a Goldbrand Crest a forgotten ritual that has since been lost among the GB Crew as little carry it left but two-survivors. He’s often shirtless for all to see. (Gives him that unrestricted feeling Miqo’tes like plus has meaning to him.)

COMMON ACCESSORIES: Talisman across his neck that has several link-pearls attached to a string with a condor feather which represents ‘freedom’, the pearls mainly allow him to keep in-contact with crew-mates and a bundle of criminal orientated allies or business associates. A combat satchel attached to his belt that allows him quick accessibility and utility. Owns a signature tricorne hat that is leather matching his often outfit of black leather which serves to highlight his seen mysterious and imposing scoundrel aesthetic.

PERSONAL –––-

PROFESSION: Captain of the Goldbrand, navigation, commanding, claiming panties all over Eorzea and providing pleasure where others need the lesson or reminder. Along with a thief, smuggler, diplomat and a veteran sailor. He’s also a chaser of treasure from old relics to folktales passed on in Legends through very little evidence of the existences but scrolls & charts that he reads and plans out accordingly before attempting his plunder for fortune.

HOBBIES: Drinking, Ocarina, Women, Pleasure, More Pleasure, Even more Pleasure, Entertainment (Former Pleasure Dome worker as a Dancer and Escort.) Juggling, Acrobatics, Jury-rigging, Swimming, Teaching, Training, Mentor, Fighting, Fishing, Brawling, Working out. Exploring. Adventuring. Landing into dangerous situations.

LANGUAGES:  Fluent (Mostly) Eorzean, Xaelic, and Hingan, Pirate Tongue. (Working on venturing past his horizon to open trades and communications with beast-tribes for business escapades or other relationships.)

RESIDENCE: Ul’dah

FEARS: None. (Backstory behind that) He’s not immune to psychological attacks and is prone to them.

RELATIONSHIPS –––-

SPOUSES: Failed many.

CHILDREN: Bastard children all around who knows you might be one. He’s often out there being ever the man-whore and shameless about the fact.

PARENTS: Hoku Solaire (Father - Alive) - (PC) Rokeia Solaire (Mother - Deceased giving birth to Kuro Solaire)

SIBLINGS: Unknown but Father was a former Nunh of a branch in the Coeurl Tribe, there’s more room to make some. (Has ancestors in an upcoming arc been polishing.)

OTHER RELATIVES: Many unknown. Though Sol Akagane / Founding GB Captain Gark would be considered along with his OG Crew as Family in a more surrogate / adoption style way. Wild Crew.

PETS: Which kind you wondering?

TRAITS –––-

extroverted / introverted / in between

disorganized / organized / in between

close minded / open-minded / in between

calm / anxious / in between

disagreeable / agreeable / in between

cautious / reckless / in between

patient / impatient / in between

outspoken / reserved / in between

leader / follower / in between

empathetic / unemphatic / in between

optimistic / pessimistic / in between

traditional / modern / in between

hard-working / lazy / in between

cultured / un-cultured / in between

loyal / disloyal / in between

faithful / unfaithful / in between

ADDITIONAL INFORMATION –––-

SMOKING HABIT: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

DRUGS: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

ALCOHOL: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess

@mooglemeet @crystal-rp-ffxiv​ @balmungrp​ @ffxiv-crystal-rp​ @balmungroleplayers-blog​

HOOKS + OOCLY, I AM –––– (Below cut)

HOOKS –––-

◘  Mystical Journey - Meet Captain who’s rebuilding towards something on a scale higher than the skies that’s far beyond himself. Whether friendships forged, romantic, rival, or outright enemy. Open to plot about just anything whether one-shot, or slice of life. Each confrontation and connection is impactful and holds weight that determines and shapes him, his source of power by himself is extremely low but the wind and orbit of who he’s surrounded swells and creates upon him alongside them or with that fact, he may overcame the impossible multiple times, even his goal of deemed ultimus. He’s lustful, prideful, sinful. Though there’s good in his scoundrel ways and also freely can be interpreted as evil against the pure heart. From descendants to nearly wherever sea’s may touch he can be found voyaging too or from. Depending on the City-State there’s more mystery surrounding him due to him trying to remain under the radar but he’s also pretty brash, open, which can net him in infinite chaos and trouble. This dark and often cursed seemingly lifestyle he’s thrown under sometimes he also needs to be in the company of innocent and light, peaceful individuals. To remain humane and stay on track of him straying from being the problem. Many lives have died under his company, many lessons and time’s he’s ‘wrecked’’ the smallest and few encounters overall tally and aid him with building his compassionate side to see those people again. ◘  Scourges - The worst of the worst pirate crew’s. They command various levels of commandment, control, conquering all that is blue and water-bound. Each hold their own vendetta and thoughts on what being a pirate or their own treasure ‘sake’ they wish to lay ownership. Ongoing and tackling these threats with Captain holds mighty risk. (Subject to your comfort) In this case it can result in injuries, mental trauma, or many afflictions that may provide more experience to your character or layers. - There are no clear solutions on how to defeat, overcome, or maybe it’s just an encounter with a band of Crewmates from the varying Crews, that’ll overall build steps closer to final battles or all-out Warfare or cripple these Crew’s to make him able to defeat them with his Wild Crew. ◘  Ulterior - (Mystery/+18Dark ) - A cultist crew held from marshy swamped seas, polluted and tainted. They blur webs of confusion alongside deceit. Operating in the blends of guises that shadowy walk in public crowds they don’t distinguish themselves. The pressure of this arc will be dark, twisted, and every foreboding, never certain what’s reality. Vastly in concern, they’ve begun becoming more bold and manipulating brave pirate’s, adventures, would-be sea goers who get reported missing soon afterwards. Only to be converted and abducted into this Cultist crew as nearly every encounter with them as they eat and feast off your fears turn’s their targets into belief of a high power, a mad god under all fleshing skin. Visited during nightmares. ◘  OMONGA - (Bloody/Violent +18 Extremely Dark) - This Scourge crew is one of the most dangerous altogether. They’re primitive freaks, viking pirates of sorts. Who outright raid, pillage, slaughter anything that moves approaching their territory. A force unlike any other, a dominating and deathly, blight of a Giant who strike’s fear just mentioned by pirate’s of old, stays clear from him and often plays nice to prevent gaining his wrath or detection, better to submit. YORE of the Gorey Seas is their Captain who destructively holds gatekeeper and one force that Maelstrom even cannot overcome their brute waters as they stay stationary and defensive, he’s not too mobile beyond his ‘Nation’  but his crew are savages and they operate like the fiercest warmongers, also they’ve got berserkers. Used to be known wanted but after many bounty hunters and foolish adventurers tried taking his life and the failures stacked up, using the defeated and weak for soil for harvesting their crops, and even their own fleets could bypass their engineering he remained untouchable. Sort of a necessary bridge from one individual owning all the seas altogether. They’ve a whole hierarchy, torture system, culture, that is ultra barbaric. He’ll need additional power to help him have a chance to survive and maintain more importantly the lives of his Crew. This is his last chance to get it all right. (There’s more too but I’ll save them unless asked or somehow the other’s become dealt with or too full.) ◘  Wanted: Deadman - (Suspenseful / Thriller / Mystery) - Recently Captain had resurfaced from death making advancements and pursuits only identifiable as his motives. Maelstrom and other officials, detectives, could be working alongside a set of Law characters that I’ve created also trying to seize and capture him for not just a hefty bounty it’s an instant hanging to death and gallows if he’s caught this time. Or a huge payout. He’s stacked multiplied crimes of indecencies, broken peace, slandered Maelstrom, stolen, scammed, rebelled for Freedom, liberated and uncovered crimes against city-state laws, he’s an outright menace to society. Though Captain and his Crew are crafty and now alongside his First Crewmate are covering his tracks desperately to prevent him from being heard again. Though if Captain succeeds in claiming or ‘Goldbrand’’ regains recognition and infamy again over the high-seas whether by gaining influence, relics, or defeating Scourges and creating more noise. He’ll be even more on the run. His Crew are accessories so capturing them may be enough to draw him out or still provide information and payouts. If he’s noted to still be breathing a full on world bounty can be placed to only increase the odds stacked against his time. (Also wanted by Voidals and anything relating to a Scourge. His enemies are highly stacked but he’s got some incredible reach and allies, people he genuinely loves and cannot be anything without them.) ◘  Isle RP - (High Fantasy / Evolving) - Various Isle’s can be visited, linked and tether to a Crewmate’s personal quest. Or maybe Fables. Each Isle has its own unique dangers and is creatively open to any adapting once the base concept is thought out. I have multiple in mind. Some of them have treasures, others have temporary treasures once the threat on each Isle is dealt with the treasure may be spent. Those things might be non useful, so the experience and journey alone may be the only reward. Or surviving and wreckage etc can also occur, it's all open to free-form.

◘  Relic Hunt - (High Fantasy / Evolving ) - (Reference) - Captain’s crew and trade is being a professional treasure hunter diver. Searching and uncovering ancient tablets and thing’s long forgotten past time itself from allagan, mhachi, amdapori and other mythological natures. From Voidal Relics to the series of Deity Relic’s there remains ruins and dungeons, trials, labyrinths, that possess unique items with governed power imbued from primals, high aetherial beings, or prototypes to strange works of magic and science. Depending on the Relic often determines how desperately Captain seeks to net it under his awareness than allow another to uncover as rival band’s of Scourges and pirate crew also would chase for such and want to use it for dominion and nefarious reasonings. Sometimes they’ll already possess said Relic’s and be threats to battle for the property. Which in that case it’s plundering.time. Depending what Relic is conversed around it could be difficult puzzles, or trials, or something more tame to fetch. If another Historian or someone he believes would preserve the item, safer than within his stead, he’ll only aid in retrieving and less on acquiring. Better the relic stay’s far from his lurking dangers that already pursue his waters.

◘  Crew / No Crew - (Optional Addon) - Can choose whether you wish me to RP the other Crewmates and have them interact with your character / characters or bring multi-muses too. Each Crewmate or the main 13 have their own quests, narratives, their own motives of why they’re even following Captain, but they can betray, be broken, all them will act very realistic and lifelike, so they can be romanced etc too. Captain would go to world’s end for them. Make no mistake, this is his Last Crew and shot, he’s on the thinnest surface of water. Soon the mightiest tides will crash and collide against him and his Worldly Finder, his ship, if he’s unable to reign them or lead them to aid their own morale's then he’ll have no chance in getting to the end of his own quest, goal. Each scourge, relic, everything is an obstacle and aiming for something grand.

Alternatively, I can just RP Captain himself and vaguely mention anything else regarding. Might also gain allies, other crewmates, other things that’ll play parts depending on the arc.

Writing is my lifeblood I enjoy stories.

Overly chill and outspoken along with communication my prime focus. I human so I break down and have to recuperate my energy and health sometimes. Not into drama outside RP.

I Para-RP but do nearly ever format and style.

I’m open to plot within any genre.

24/7 Nerd. +18 year RP experience all around from LARPing, Dungeon Master /  Former event runner /  Former Owner / Leader for Discords and Linkshells / Tabletop Creator. There’s nothing I cannot do.

I’m CST. Though chronic-deteriorating health makes my hours rando. I prefer Discord RP. (Tumblr too sometimes if have an idea.) In-game I can be swayed. ◘  ~ This all long but trying to be communicative and thorough upfront. A necessary evil, I fear.

YOU CAN CONTACT ME VIA ––

Twitter - Captain Kuro Solaire

Tumblr - I try to follow everyone in FFXIV Community so should be able to DM me.

Discord: Kuro Solaire#0508

Ref Sheet

+18 F-list

#LFRP #Balmung #Crystal #Captain Kuro Solaire #Final Fantasy XIV #Writer #FFXIV #If want to rehash HMU

[lunnamars]

copycat

In the midst of all the suffering, in one last effort, her eyes met his and she smiled. A sweet smile she reserved only for him.

(and as a reader kindly told me, I should be putting a side note of my babies being kinda OOC. I'm okay with it in this story, but so all of you know)

It was her blood pouring out nonstop and what it represented that kept him from thinking rationally.

If there was one thing Zoro was proud of, it was his ability to analyze any situation and be able to stay calm on critical occasions. Just like this one.

The difference was that he was doing quite the opposite of what he was trained to do because it was her blood pouring out nonstop and what it represented that kept him from thinking rationally.

Zoro's hands were red and sticky from pressing the wound on Tashigi's back. The bright red blood, the strong smell of iron and the sound of every drop running down his hand and dripping on the floor were starting to make him sick, his stomach twisting as if his body wanted to throw out everything he ate or drank in the past forty-eight hours.

It was her blood pouring out nonstop and what it represented that kept him from thinking rationally.

Tashigi was already in a half-awake and half-sleepy state, but Zoro couldn't, under any circumstance, let her close her eyes. One hand continued to press the wound to her back and the other held her face. Now it was the bright red blood, the smell of iron, the sound of every drop dripping on the floor and her face dirty with the fresh blood that was in his hand that made him sick again, but she needed to pay attention, she needed to look at him.

“Oe, four-eyes, don't you fucking dare to die on me.”

The words were harsh, but the situation was critical and he was unable to stay calm. With every desperate step from Chopper, every weeping from Nami, every yell from Smoker, every gasp from Robin, every curse from Sanji was making the swordsman lose his fucking mind. With each passing minute, it was as if all those noises were slowly muffled and only Tashigi's shallow breathing remained.

Her eyes didn't seem to focus on anything and neither did his. He could only hear her whispering disconnected phrases and every time Zoro told her to not be stubborn at least once in her god damn life because if she kept talking, more blood would come out and God (or any divine entity that exists in this world) knows he was about to lose all sanity.

“I… hurt… Smoker-san… guys… I…”

“For the last time, just keep quiet, four eyes. I’m just asking that of you, damn it. Can you fucking do this just once?”

Zoro really didn't want to swear that much, but all of his brain efforts were focused only on making that woman not close her eyes and, at the same time, continue to stop the blood until Chopper managed to do something.

After getting out of her stupor, Robin also started using Hana Hana no Mi to help him with the task. Because he only has two hands and no one was stopping the blood that spurted from the wound in Tashigi's chest.

Zoro was never a religious man and he doesn't even believe in anything divine, but what he wouldn't give now for his prayers to be answered. Please don't let her die, please, please.

But how do you survive a sword through your chest?

He doesn't know anyone who has survived. But who knows, maybe Tashigi will be the first.

Tashigi. Honored captain, defender of justice, admirable swordsman, co-leader of the Navy revolution, war heroine, daughter of Wano, Kuina's older sister.

The woman who has no regard for her own life if it meant protecting others.

The woman who just sacrificed herself to save his life and his crew’s.

The woman he argued the day before and said so many bad things was now on her knees in front of him with a sword stuck in her chest and blood spurting everywhere.

Tashigi was losing consciousness and was losing fast.

“Hey, hey, hey, just keep looking at me, Tashigi.”

She did, but he could see that her eyelids were getting heavier and heavier.

Please don't let her die, please please.

The lips that he wanted to kiss so much but didn't have the courage now were stained red and heaven knows how he preferred it to be lipstick and not death. Every time she tried to say something, she ended up spitting blood and his face was already soaked, but Zoro couldn't, for anything in this world, care about it.

Robin released him from the task of stopping the bleeding and he managed to put both hands on Tashigi's face to force her to look at him. His hands were completely painted red and he hated to wear her blood - hands, arms, face, chest, everything. It didn't suit him well and he was really about to lose his fucking mind.

She blinked heavily but was managing to maintain eye contact and Zoro let himself be hopeful. Chopper ran around, trying incessantly to control the situation, but the swordsman could see how his little paws were shaking and how his eyes were red from crying.

If Chopper said there was no solution, it was because it was the end.

Please don't let her die, please please.

Not her, please, please.

There was so much he still wanted to say, she couldn't leave now. He wanted to say good things, not the bad things he spat on her face. Instead of saying that she would never be as good as her sister, he wanted to be able to say that she became so strong that she became his rival and that he was so proud of her that the feeling couldn’t fit in his own the chest; he wanted to say that she was an incredibly strong woman and that standing her ground after everything she had been through in life was admirable, but instead, he called her weak.

He vomited so many mean words because uncontrollable anger washed over him when she volunteered for a suicide mission. Wano's war was nearing its end, but they lost so many people in so many bloody battles. Zoro did not want to lose her. My God, not her.

Death, take someone bad, not her. She's too good. Please.

He hurt her. It was the first time that Tashigi didn’t argue back and Zoro found it very strange. But if that was what it took for her not to go out the door and return in a coffin, it would be worth it. She might hate him for the rest of her life, but she would hate him alive.

"After all, I thought you didn't think that way about me anymore. Too bad because I don't think the same about you anymore."

Zoro never saw such sadness overflow in her eyes as at that moment. Not even when she told her story to the Straw Hats - and that sadness was similar to what he saw so often on Robin's face. But what she expressed right after hearing his angry words was as if someone was putting a knife in the swordsman's heart and spinning. She knows that pain now.

“Oe, four-eyes, you're doing well. Just keep looking at me, okay? If you keep doing well, how about I let you train with Wado or Enma? You are now like a sword goddess here in Wano, right? They all obey you, so what do you think?”, Zoro knew he was being a blabbermouth, but he needed to keep her awake and maybe talking about swords could keep her focused on him.

“Sandai… don’t… obey me… you… only master…”

“I know. You found her for me, remember? Do you remember, Tashigi?”

The swordsman looked at Chopper out of the corner of his eye and saw the little reindeer crying copiously on Usopp's lap. Then, Zoro realized that he had no solution. That was the end.

His heart just stopped beating and he couldn't think of anything else. His mind was empty with just a white noise in the background.

No no no no no. Please don’t.

Zoro was sure that he must be looking like a maniac, with extremely wide eyes, frowns and a completely unformed smile. Smiling might make her endure a little longer, so he tried, but it was in vain.

Tashigi could no longer lift her head and Zoro could feel the life being drained from her. He held her face tightly as if that simple act could prevent her existence from leaving this world.

“C’mon, four-eyes. Hold on a little longer…“

“Ro… ronoa…”

“Come on, there's still so much for you to do-”

He felt someone's strong hand on his shoulder, but he felt no comfort at all. This person didn’t want to say that everything would be okay - the gesture was asking him to accept and let go.

No, no, no.

“Zoro. There's… there's nothing else we can do.”

Sanji's voice sounded as choked up as his. Zoro was sure that the cook was crying and then realized that the blood that was running down his face didn’t come from an injury. It was his own tears melting it.

Tashigi spat violently again and he understood that she wanted to say something.

“G-guys, I…“

Zoro already had a scold on the tip of his tongue, but Nami grabbed his arm. The girl bit her lip to keep from crying, but she was failing miserably. She sobbed desperately in the same way as Robin and Chopper. Sanji, Usopp, and Franky wept silently. Torao watched with a frightened expression, not knowing how to react and Smoker did the same.

Zoro didn't even want to think about Luffy's reaction when he found out.

Over the past few months, Tashigi has stood by the Straw Hat by Smoker's order to fight on behalf of the Navy revolutionaries for Wano - her home that has been denied to her for so many years. The captain was extremely suspicious at the beginning of the alliance, but Luffy always manages to unite any type of person and Tashigi was no exception. She fought alongside them and for them.

Her courage seemed to know no bounds.

That's probably why it didn't take long for the crew to fall in love with her and consider her one of them. And being considered part of the Straw Hats meant that she’d have all the treatment that anyone in the crew did. It meant that they would all protect her no matter what.

So where did they messed up so that Zoro was holding a nearly dead Tashigi in his arms?

“Guys… t-thanks for t-taking care… of a weakling like me…”

Zoro couldn't believe the words she had just said. She was dying and that was what she thought? How idiotic were they to make this woman so kind to think that until the last seconds of her life?

“No, Tashigi-chan!!! Y-you're not weak!! If it weren't for you, this war wouldn't be w-won!!”, Nami screamed and with eyes filled with tears.

“Y-y-you're our m-m-mate, Tashigi-chan!! I don't w-w-want you to go!”, Chopper cried like a baby and it was almost impossible to understand what he was talking about.

“Y-you are o-one of the m-most brave person I have ever m-met, Tashigi!!”, Robin's voice was completely choked.

They all gathered around her, hugging her and holding her tightly, trying to keep her there, with them. Everyone hoping for some miracle, anything that would make her not leave them.

Zoro continued to hold her face while everyone cried and sobbed hysterically. In the midst of all the suffering, in one last effort, her eyes met his and she smiled. A sweet smile she reserved only for him.

She whispered with great difficulty, but no one seemed to hear.

Zoro did.

“I-I… I re-really wanted… to be more… than… a  copycat for you… Zoro.”

The swordsman's eyes widened and his heart ached as if it was squirming inside his chest. But no, he wouldn't let it be that way. He had been a coward all these months, never admitting any feelings for her and always admiring her from afar as if the mere thought of getting close to her was wrong.

And now what he has left is a feeling of guilt and regret.

He could have lived so many things in the past few months, but he had been a coward.

He wouldn't be a coward now. She deserved much more than his cowardice.

Zoro leaned in and kissed her lips. Their foreheads touched and whispered in a shaky voice.

“You’re anything but a copycat to me.”

She was almost gone, he could feel it. He kissed her again.

“You are everything.”

She was crying silently, but couldn’t speak anymore. The only thing he had in those last moments was her smile.

"You too."

Zoro opened his mouth to speak, but the sparkle in Tashigi's eyes had already faded. He only held the shell where she lived and he never thought he’d feel so much pain in his life.

It was unbearable and suffocating.

Zoro howled and cried desperately along with his companions. He hadn't cried like that since Kuina's death and even so, now it was so much more. He didn't know how to stop and he didn't even know if he wanted to stop.

His head was heavy, his body ached, his chest looked like it was going to explode, he couldn't feel anything but suffering, but he was able to hear clearly when Luffy cried out Tashigi's name in anguish.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

“Zoro, her funeral is today. You coming?”, Sanji's voice was so hoarse that if it weren't for the years they spent together, he wouldn't have recognized the cook.

Zoro remained silent, his eyes fixed on the waves breaking lightly in the ocean. Probably a considerable amount of time had passed because Sanji spoke again cautiously.

“I think she’d like you to go.”

It had been three days since Tashigi's death and Zoro had entered a cycle of monstrous violence. No one survived against his swords and no one was able to stop him.

Not even his crew.

The captain's death raised indignation inside everyone's chest and even those who had given up fighting decided to step on the battlefield once again. The woman had become a symbol of resistance and neither Kaido nor Orochi would be able to contain the rebellion.

Because this war had taken a woman pure and just. There was no way to forgive that.

Since then, Zoro has survived on sake. He didn't eat, he didn't sleep, he didn't say anything, he just fought. Until Sanji decided to stop this rampant train of self-destruction before it was too late. The cook confronted him ("You're doing everything contrary to what she wanted!! She died to save us and you want to kill yourself!? Fuck you, Zoro!!") and this resulted in a nasty fight between them. Not even Luffy was able to intervene.

Sanji always had that collected manner about him, but he was also in a rage, just like Zoro. The swordsman noticed by the abrupt way he spoke and the bad words he used. But he also realized afterward that Sanji's real intention was to get him to expel all the accumulated anger before it grew to alarming levels. It was better for him to blow up on Sanji now than to blow up on the entire crew. They wouldn't stand a chance against Zoro's bloodlust. Then the cook withstood all the blows, returned all the attacks, sometimes allowed himself to be a punching bag and other times he just screamed at him. Sanji was trying to tire Zoro at all costs.

When neither of them could stand it anymore because of so many injuries, Zoro let out a cry so painful that Sanji ended up hugging him. He understood the swordsman's despair because Tashigi had become a great friend of the cook. The tiredness won and the two could only cry. Soon after, the two felt Luffy's embrace and tears and when they least realized it, the entire crew enveloped them in a huge hug.

Zoro didn't know how much time they stood there in that way because everything looked like a blur, but when he came down from his numb state, he noticed Sanji was holding out a large plate of food for him.

"Please, Zoro, eat. Things are going to get harder now because her death was a huge blow to us and we’re going to need you."

That was the day before. The two ate together and Zoro needed to thank him because Sanji had been, in fact, very patient and, despite suffering too, was willing to help him. Despite always bickering with each other, the swordsman knew that Sanji was a very valuable friend and one who understood him the most.

“I'll go.”

Sanji nodded and kept silent. After a while, he spoke again.

“They’ll grant her the maximum ranking. It should be Vice-Admiral, but they want her to be remembered as an Admiral.”

The cook lit his cigarette and after just one drag, Zoro snorted.

“As if she’d care about that shit.”

“Yeah.”

Tashigi never cared about ranks and Zoro knew that. The only thing that mattered to her was protecting people. For her and Smoker, ranks were just names to inflate empty people's ego.

“Come on, Zoro. Everyone must be waiting for us by now.”

“Yeah.”

Halfway he stopped and Sanji did too when he realized that Zoro wasn’t following him. He looked confused and his expression was one of inquiry.

“Sanji.”

Zoro noticed that the usual eye covered by the blonde bangs widened for a fraction of a second, but then he just nodded, telling him that he was paying attention.

“Thanks.”

Sanji smiled slightly and turned away, walking towards Sunny's exit again.

“Come on, moss head.”

.

.

.

.

.

.

The funeral was pompous, but it had great honor in the whole ceremony. Zoro couldn't say what it was, but he felt as if everyone present had a huge regard for Tashigi. Hiyori asked for the woman to be buried in her country of ancestry and the Navy granted the request. Luffy asked Smoker for him and Zoro to carry her coffin and the Vice-Admiral had no strength to deny it. Thus, Smoker, Rear-Admiral Hina, Luffy, and Zoro were the last to see Admiral Tashigi's face before she was delicately delivered to the soil.

Zoro was so numb that he didn't even feel his fingertips. Beside him, Nami and Robin were crying profusely - the first hugging Luffy as if her life depended on it and the second had the face hidden in Franky's neck. The two were the ones who became closest to Tashigi and Zoro could imagine the pain they felt for the loss of their friend.

He knew it well because he had lost a friend, a rival and the only woman he loved (and would love) in his entire life.

After the whole ceremony was over, Zoro waited patiently for everyone to say his last goodbye to Admiral in front of her tombstone so he could say some last words to her.

I don't know if there’s this afterlife shit, but if it does, I hope you’ll listen to me, Admiral Four-eyes.

All of the Straw Hats were gone and the last one in front of the tombstone was Smoker. Zoro decided to approach.

Smoker probably noticed the swordsman's presence but chose not to recognize it. The two remained in heavy silence and neither moved. Until suddenly, the marine looked at the sky and grunted.

“You know, that idiot was completely head over heels for a pirate.”

This caught Zoro's attention. Smoker lit only one cigar.

"She did some crazy shit because she said she needed to reach and overcome the damn pirate. She trained her finger to the bone and whenever I asked why he, she always replied that it was because he was the best swordsman she had ever met.”

Smoker took the cigar out of his mouth and held it between his fingers. Zoro bit his lip because he didn't want to collapse in front of the other man.

“She also told me once that he and his crew saved her and made her see how wrong we were.”

Zoro clenched his fists so hard that he was afraid of tearing his hand. Smoker continued.

“She said that this pirate was different. That the bastard and the crew were different and that she’d protect them at all costs.”

The Vice-Admiral continued to stare at the cigar in his hand.

“Tashigi usually had a bunch of imbeciles drooling over her, but she never gave them the time of day. She told Hina that although she hated the fact, she had already been swept off her feet in Loguetown.”

Zoro's shoulders were shaking and his eyes started to water. Smoker sniffed but the swordsman gave the marine privacy. He took the cigar and put it in the base of the tombstone. The pirate seemed to have lost his voice during the Vice Admiral's monologue, but now, in the silence, he seemed to find it again to make one last request.

“Smoker. Can I have Shigure?”

The man answered nothing, just took the sword from his back and handed it to Zoro. The swordsman held Shigure with both hands and for some reason, he could feel Tashigi. Now you’ll be with me, four-eyes. Smoker rubbed his face and turned to go. Before actually leaving, he seemed to hesitate, but stopped and put a hand on Zoro's left shoulder.

“Stay safe, boy.”

And with that, he headed for the exit of the cemetery, leaving Zoro with his chest hurting more than the healthy limit. He sat down, crossed one leg on top of the other, rested Shigure on his thighs and meditated, focusing only on the presence of Tashigi and the longing that suffocated him. He doesn't know how much time he spent there, in that position, with the wind blowing through his hair and swinging his three earrings, but meditation helped to calm his heart.

When his breathing seemed to ease, he decided to throw words at the wind.

“Seriously, how stupid I was… do you forgive me, Tashigi?”

Your sister was my friend, but you were… the most important woman to me.

Zoro looked at the sky and remembered the day when the two decided to have a truce and how Tashigi slept so close to him that she was able to warm him up in the cold night.

“Is there such a stupid thing as another life, Tashigi?”

Zoro covered his face with his left hand and swallowed all the misery.

“Can I meet you in another life?”

The swordsman fought bravely so that no tears would even come out, but judging by the sight that turned into a blur, he must have failed miserably.

“My dream is for you too now.”

Zoro decided to stay for a while, but he knew he was just delaying the final goodbye. Nothing would bring her back, but Shigure would stay with him forever. He even wondered whether his body would support the weight of yet another sword, but he would manage. Finally, with swollen eyes, he untied the black bandana he always carried on his arm and stuck it with a knife Tanto in the base of the headstone.

He got up and headed for the exit. Life needed to go on and it's not like he was going to forget about her. He didn't even know how it would be possible to forget her.

Me too, four-eyes. Since Loguetown.

This time, I wanted to go full angst because I woke up in that vibe hahaha and this fic is test for me to train that style. So if anything feels out of place, I apologize.

Again: everything happens after Punk Hazard, but with headcanons related to the current canonical arc.

A quick reminder that English is not my first language, so forgive me for any mistakes.

#zoro x tashigi #zotash #roronoa zoro #tashigi #opfanfic #fanfiction

[flipthescreen]

I figured I’d write down the full story of Galactis properly so here is it (part 1)

Born towards the end of the first great galactic war, Ja’ Ko was Born to a Notorious sith lord known as Darth Mayhem, who was renound among her peers for her powerbase and power, and an unnamed sith lord. Naturally it wouldn’t take long for the childs affinity with the force to take shape, thanks to his mother he was able to stay out of the sith Academy on korriban until she deemed him ready. During his childhood Darth Mayhem wouldn’t let her son out of her sight, thought he will never admit he has any memory of it as the 2 didn’t actually speak much, being left to his own devices he would try to copy what his mother and her apprentices did with the force, eventually being able to throw soldiers long distances by the time he was 12. Entering into his teen years Darth Mayhem moved him back to her estate on ziost in a bid to stop her main rival, Darth Malgus, from finding out about him and trying to use him as some kind of bargaining chip against her forces and herself. During this time he would find himself messing with the guard droids around the estate whenever he wasn’t trying to copy the various apprentices and loyal sith that also lived at the estate, and due to his aggressive, distant and child like nature a lot of people considered him a nuisance, one of which tried to rat out his existence to Malgus before imperial intelligence stopped him. Eventually at the sith academy overseer tremel was under pressure and threat to find someone to outmatch Vemrin, who was becoming a threat to his continued existence, eventually hearing about Darth Mayhem’s son from one of her apprentices. Running out of options Tremel approached the dark lord about the prospect of her son going through the trials the become sith, now Darth Mayhem had always planned to send him to the academy before he became an adult in order to make sure he excelled when he became sith. After the situation at the Academy with Vemrin being explained to her she begrudgingly allowed her son to be put through to trials, but not before warning Tremel that if Ja’ Ko died she would do much worse than whatever  Vemrin would do to him. Ja’ Ko, now taking on the name of Galactis to represent his desire to be known across the galaxy, soon arrived on Korriban going through the trials, and it didn’t take long for Darth Baras to know of his presence, he may have been unaware for a little longer regardless of Galactis’ actions due to his massive ego and Vemrin’s sudden distaste for basically everyone now. Baras sent Galactis on very unorthodox tasks around Korriban, in order to test his skill against the other powerful acolytes, over the next few days. Galactis eventually became very popular among acolytes who had been pushed around by Vemrin, which was nearly everyone. around this time Vemrin’s girlfriend was finally getting fed up with his shit and decided she wanted to spite him, and approached Galactis and after explaining her own issues with Vemrin and Galactis egar to always get one over on him, and eventually Vemrins Girlfriend cheated on him with Galactis, and Vemrin found out quickly enough and was pissed, only fueling Galactis’ ego with the ability to get under his rivals skin. soon enough Galactis and Vemrin were sent on their final trial, to enter the tomb of Naga sadow and claim a lightsaber in order to become Baras’ apprentice, at this time Galactis had been given the option to have a twi’lek prisoner, vette, help him find where the lightsaber was hidden, whilst in the tombs Galactis’ forcibly removed the shock collar on his companion, his reason being that his own mother didn’t like the idea of owning slaves, as in her words “A slaves loyalty is never guaranteed, a free being serves far more loyally than one that isn’t” and Galactis was just raised in that way. Eventually making their way into the tomb of where the lightsaber Galactis sought was kept they found Vemrin to be tailing them, who Galactis quickly disposed of because Vemrin would not shut up even when he was outmatched. Returning to Baras succesful Galactis was apointed his apprentice and given ownership of Vette, which he quickly renounced, this caught his master’s curiosity. (Baras knew Darth Mayhem had a child due to his close ties with the Dark council but was never aware of their identity) However despite not owning her, on Carrick station Galactis asked her to join him too Dromund kaas, his motivation at the time being an attempt to start up his own power base at the time, vette agreed to the offer as despite not really wanting to hang around a sith, Galactis was her only way of staying safe among the empire’s anti-alien policies. Upon arriving on Dromund kaas Galactis decided to take advantage of his mothers name and introduced himself as “Galactis Mayhem” at Kaas city in order to get passed certain restrictions and get some armour tailored for himself and Vette. Once meeting up with Baras in his office he was sent on a variety of tasks, dealing with a slave revlolt, orchestating an attack against the rogue sith lord Gratham, going as far as to kill him and eventually ventured into the dark temple to help Baras get infomation out of a republic agent. The agent revealed infomation regarding Baras’ personal enemy, Jedi Master Nomen karr, and his new padawan who posed a threat to baras’ agents spread across the republic and galaxy. Without a name or anymore infomation on Nomen Karr and his padawan, Baras sent Galactis and vette to choke out his agents at risk of being exposed, first sending them to balmora to meet up with one of his most loyal servants, Malivai Quinn. With Quinn’s help the 2 dispossed of the first of Baras’ agents with ease and took care of a jedi spy who was on her way to inform Nomen Karr that his padawan was at risk, Baras deemed that his apprentice would need more than quick thinking and power to deal with Nomen Karr, and his own plans to expose Baras, and thus reassigned Quinn to Galactis’ crew. The next stop was Nar Shaddaa to stop an agent under the protection of a sith lord called Rathari, with the help of another one of Baras’ loyal servants, Halidrell Setsyn, Galactis located a quarry with repblic soldiers, right before he took his strike at the soldiers, Quinn stopped him advising to spare the soldiers in order to receive help in a fight against Rathari, to Galactis’ surprise, Quinn’s idea worked, this began giving him some power hungry ideas about his confrontation with Rathari. After besting Rathari in combat, Rathari struck down the agent Galactis was sent to kill, at first he was upset Galactis didn’t take the agent’s life, but the idea to have a reputable sith Lord in his arsenal quickly changed his mood, in exchange for his loyalty, Galactis spared Rathari’s life, Rathari, respecting his power and in no position to try anything, agreed to his terms, warning Galactis of Baras’ history with his apprentices before departing. After taking a moment to breath Baras contacted Galactis and his crew informing them to head to tatooine and seek out a jedi master who could reveal important infomation on the padawan that was causing such a threat to his plans, Galactis suggested the idea of trying to turn the padawan to the dark side instead of destroying them, this caused Baras to point out that Vette and Quinn were growing on Galactis too much and he should bite his tongue when making a suggestion like that before hanging up, this comment pissed Galactis off a lot and he headed out to tatooine feeling very angry. At one point on Tatooine Galactis was forced to view his light side reflection, and struck it down, denouncing the light side of the force, claiming sith or not that the galaxy would fear his power. Upon finding the Jedi master he sought out, he was able to get a name before striking them, and the jedi knight with them down, Jaesa willsaam. After informing Baras of the name, he tracked down her parents to Alderaan, but before Galactis could make it there he had to deal with a republic ship that had been evesdropping on him for Nomen Karr, who had been made aware they were closing in on reaching his padawan, however to his disappointment, Galactis could not confront Karr face to face and left the ship with it’s crew massacred, feeling even more angry than he had been on tatooine. On Alderaan Galactis hunted down Jaesa Willsaam’s parents and killed them off, with no further leads he returned to his ship to relax for once.

And for about 5 minutes he came up with the idea of learning how to cook for himself and right before he was about to try making a pizza the ships holocom began beeping, letting the pizza stay in the oven to answer it, and to his surprise he wasn’t about to be speaking with his master, but rather, Jaesa Willsaam offered a meeting between the 2 in an attempt to stop his rampage across the galaxy, however he left quinn and vette to organize a location because he set his pizza on fire. At the meeting Galactis found out that his luck was not turning out to be very good, as instead of finding Jaesa Willsaam was 2 jedi knights, stationed there after Nomen Karr found out about Jaesa’s plan to meet Galactis, which he promptly murdered. Back on his ship Baras called informing that Nomen Karr had challenged him to a duel to the death on Hutta, Baras took a “cowardly move” as Galactis put it, by sending him instead of going himself. However in yet another idea to expand his power base he could go against Baras’ wishes and turn Jaesa to the dark side. Upon meeting Nomen Karr things went down less than plesant, Nomen Karr became infuriated that Baras didn’t show up himself and with the experience to outmatch Galactis’ raw power, beat the apprentice to a bloody pulp, prepared to kill him in order to force Baras’ hand, however Karr made a mistake and began to monologue about what would happen to the empire once Baras’ network was exposed, and gave Galactis the chance to get back up and knock Nomen Karr out, some soldiers sent by Baras soon showed up to tie up Karr and heal Galactis in preparation for Jaesa’s arrival. After about an hour she did and felt saw Nomen karr’s true self, and began begging Galactis to explain what had happened, which he did, explaining Karr didn’t uphold his jedi code and nearly killed him (to this day Jaesa is the only person who knows this happened) and convinced her the only way to stop jedi from lying through their teeth to the galaxy was to join him, ultimately turning her to the dark side, however he realised he may have made a mistake the second she beheaded Nomen Karr the second he tried to convince Jaesa not to join Galactis. Baras finally took note of his apprentices skill and power despite his oddities and behaviour and made him a sith lord allowing Jaesa to become his apprentice, however Galactis was not prepared by any means to train Jaesa, who, without the restrictions of the jedi code turned out to be a handful, however Galactis saw a lot of himself in her so he let her behaviour slide. One day on Carrick station he was approached by a droid, claiming it had an important transmission for him, Galactis agreed to hear things out and was greeted by a holo of Darth Malgus, who luckily didn’t know who Galactis was outside of being the sith who defeated Nomen Karr, inviting Galactis to help find someone known as the emperors jedi prisoner and to meet with a moff, the champion of the great hunt, Lord Kallig and his Dashade, Khem Val and an agent from imperial intelligence to infiltrate a republic capital ship and take control of it, which they did. Afterwards they were sent to a place called the foundry to take care of the escaped prisoner, finding droids commanded by a unique droid that called itself HK-47, the 5 made quick work, of it, the agent from intelligence, Cipher 9, began going through files to find out who this prisoner was, the only name he could find was Revan, this peaking the attention of the 2 other sith Lords who said they had heard that name from a cult on dromund kaas, The bounty hunter and Galactis had no clue what they were on about of course, eventually the 5 became face to face with Revan himself, Galactis, not a fan of monologues made a pre-emptive strike and was sent flying backwards, and Revan continued his monologue, and the 5 engaged the mad jedi master in combat eventually however they weren’t sure if he died or not as he disappeared in a blinding light. Revan had certainly left a bad taste in Galactis’ mouth, returning to his ship he explained what had happened to his crew members, which prompted Quinn to start lecturing everyone about imperial history (end of part 1)

#swtor sith warrior #my swtor #swtor #swtor headcanon #sith warrior #jaesa willsaam #malavai quinn #vette #darth baras #darth malgus #swtor toons

[cinematicwasteland]

1968's seminal zombie film, Night of the Living Dead, is hailed as the groundbreaking arrival of its director, George Romero. Somewhat lost in the shuffle, however, is the film's co-writer, John Russo, who ended up retaining the rights to produce further "Living Dead" works, the first of which was a 1977 novel entitled Return of the Living Dead. Russo and producer Tom Fox then turned their attention to adapting the novel for the screen, bringing in Alien screenwriter Dan O'Bannon to write the screenplay and eventually direct the film. Featuring slapstick humor, awesome gore, and a wild cast of characters, Return of the Living Dead would become one of the greatest zombie films of all time.

It dispenses the low-key, creepy tone of its predecessor, and instead trades it in for gore, shocks, humor, and, most of all, pure entertainment. The film is tongue in cheek from the opening title card that informs us that "the events portrayed in this film are all true," and that "the names are real names of real people and real organizations." Don't expect any socio-political commentary or musings on paranoia here. Instead, expect a masterful blend of horror and comedy that's among the best the genre has to offer. That said, I'll go so far as to say Return of the Living Dead is just as vital and important to the zombie sub-genre as Romero's classic, if only because it shows that the undead can very much be a source of humor. Furthermore, the film has even influenced our perception of zombies, particularly their hunger for brains, which they vocalize at every turn. Plus, anyone who rues the rise of fast-moving, running zombies clearly wasn't paying attention to the frenzied undead here. While it seems Return of the Living Dead is generally hailed as a fine zombie film, it never seems to get enough credit for doing something different with the sub-genre in this respect.

Of course, it's never good enough to do simply do something different if the execution is lacking. That definitely isn't the case here, however, as the film is top notch all the way around. O'Bannon's direction is slick and stylish, and the film is never lacking for atmosphere. Furthermore, the film has a rich color palette and is full of ghoulish images. O'Bannon and crew truly made the most of the film's budget, as it's a classy looking production all the way around. It's a far cry from the guerrilla, low-budget look of Romero's film, but the polished look is appropriate for the Return of the Living Dead. Most importantly, however, is the fact that the humor here is just spot-on. Ranging from sight-gags to side-spilling verbal interactions, the film never fails to make audiences laugh as these characters are put through pure hell.

Said characters are the glue that holds the film together. In fact, the film sort of represents a personal “Hall of Fame”, as it's filled with some great genre actors, including Thom Mathews, Miguel Núñez, Linnea Quigley, and Clu Gulager. While Quigley's assets and her graveyard strip-dance are the film's infamous show-stealer, I've always enjoyed Núñez's character, Spider. Though he seems to be the token tough-guy ethnicity, Núñez is able to bring a dimension of sympathy and charisma to the character. While some of the group is otherwise zombie-fodder, it's such a fun group as a whole to spend some time with, as there's great chemistry even between the older cast members and the younger ones.

However, the biggest show-stealer is Clu Gulager, who is also infamous for his portrayal of the indomitable Ken Walsh in Nightmare on Elm Street 2. Gulager's character Burt almost feels like an extension of Ken Walsh, as he brings the sort of no-nonsense incredulity to the character. Gulager absolutely leaves me in stitches as he attempts to maneuver around all the absurdity with a straight face, and I certainly can't get enough of him calling everyone "buddy-boy" at every opportunity. Truly one of the most underrated characters and performances in horror history. Speaking of chemistry, Gulager, James Karen and Don Calfa play off of each other wonderfully, particularly in an early scene highlighted by Burt's awkward revelation that he needs his mortician friend to dispose of an undead body that he's hacked to pieces.

Despite all the comedy, Return of the Living Dead also succeeds as a horror film, as it's filled with some outstanding and gruesome effects. The film has some nice splatter elements, particularly when the zombies are feasting on their favorite delicacy. This one is truly one of the landmark "splat-stick" horror films, as it's a gloriously bloody romp that will leave weaker stomachs a bit squeamish. The zombie effects themselves are also among the craziest ever seen, as the film offers up a variety of ghouls in all shapes and sizes. Even the animatronic zombies are very lifelike and interact with the human cast in a believable manner. One of these zombies represents the film's signature character, the “Tarman”, a hideous, slimy, decrepit zombie that terrorizes the cast to the bitter end.

Perhaps the most unsung aspect of the film are the 1980′s themselves. Though the film is just as timeless and entertaining 30 years after its release, it's also so firmly rooted in an 80’s milieu, particularly its punk aesthetic and soundtrack. If one were to make a short list of definitive 80’s classics, this one would certainly make the list, and it's all the more charming for it

#return of the living dead #1985 #80's #horror #horror cinema #zombies #gore

[masha-russia]

What are your thoughts on Mirri Maz Duur's prophecy about Dany? I read a theory that ends with Dany's death and... no. Please tell me something Dany-friendly 😂

I don’t believe that Mirri Maz Duur was making a prophecy per se, but that she wanted to hurt Daenerys with her words.  

“When will he be as he was?” Dany demanded.

“When the sun rises in the west and sets in the east,” said Mirri Maz Duur. “When the seas go dry and mountains blow in the wind like leaves. When your womb quickens again, and you bear a living child. Then he will return, and not before.”

Mirri Maz Duur wanted to say “never” in a poetic way, to say that Drogo’s return is as impossible as the sun rising in the West or as mountains “blowing like leaves”. And the part about Daenerys’ womb was a cruel addition, to rub salt in her wounds. A popular theory is that some of Mirri Maz Duur’s statements did actually become true, in an indirect way -> the sun that rose in the West and set in the East was Quentyn Martell (Martell’s banner is a sun), the mountain that blew in the wind was either Gregor Clegane who died or the pyramid in Meereen which crumbled because of Viserion and Rhaegal. The “living child” of Daenerys didn’t happen yet, but it’s possible that Dany had a miscarriage in her last chapter of A Dance with Dragons, so her womb did quicken (now thanks to the show we know she’ll have a child with Jon, and a living one, cause I see no point for GRRM to make his main female character pregnant with the child of his main male character only for this child to be miscarried or a stillborn). As for Drogo returning, it could be either Drogon (named after Khal Drogo) who returned to her , or the strength of the Khalasar returning to her in Winds of Winter, since she is the Stallion who Mounts the World. Or something else that we don’t know about yet - we have to wait and see. Whatever the correct interpretation, by all means Daenerys isn’t dying because of Mirri Maz Duur words. She may die while fighting against the Others, and sacrifice herself to save the world, but this part of her journey wasn’t “foretold” by Mirri Maz Duur.

I can tell you a lot of Daenerys-friendly stuff :D For example, did you know that her story from A Game of Thrones was published separately in a Science Fiction magazine, one month before the novel itself was first published, as a stand-alone story intitulated “Blood of the Dragon”, and that it won the Hugo Award for best novella? The first Award George received for ASOIAF was for Daenerys’ AGOT story :) George also published her A Storm of Swords story separately in the same magazine, intitulated “Path of the Dragon”. She is the only character to have that honor :) The only other publication released as a stand alone is the collection of Greyjoy chapters from A Feast for Crows (Aeron, Asha, Victarion).

Or do you remember when Tyrion described Daenerys as being “above all a rescuer”? Well in the same book Daenerys saves Tyrion’s life, by forbidding Hizdahr and the pit masters to loose lions on him in the fighting pit as they intended. So it was a nice foreshadowing in the narative and a sort of self-fulfilling comment on Tyrion’s part. He called Daenerys a rescuer, and she rescued him ^^

Or, Daenerys is the character from ASOIAF with the most artworks :D None of the other characters come close to the number of arts she has. She is meant to be drawn - a beautiful girl with fantasy features (Daenerys is the only character among theprincipal characters who has fantasy features!) who happens to be a main character, who has dragons and armies and a good heart. She is very marketable for artists! So rejoice, you can browse the net for hours in search of artworks dedicated to her :)

This quote: “She loved the sea. She liked the sharp salty smell of the air, and the vastness of horizons bounded only by a vault of azure sky above. It made her feel small, but free as well. She liked the dolphins that sometimes swam along beside Balerion, slicing through the waves like silvery spears, and the flying fish they glimpsed now and again. She even liked the sailors, with all their songs and stories. Once on a voyage to Braavos, as she’d watched the crew wrestle down a great green sail in a rising gale, she had even thought how fine it would be to be a sailor.”

Or this one: “Strong Belwas is hurt.” His stomach was red with the blood sheeting down from the meaty gash beneath his breasts.“It is nothing. I let each man cut me once, before I kill him.” He slapped his bloody belly. “Count the cuts and you will know how many Strong Belwas has slain.” But Dany had lost Khal Drogo to a similar wound, and she was not willing to let it go untreated. She sent Missandei to find a certain Yunkish freedman renowned for his skill in the healing arts. Belwas howled and complained, but Dany scolded him and called him a big bald baby until he let the healer stanch the wound with vinegar, sew it shut, and bind his chest with strips of linen soaked in fire wine. Only then did she lead her captains and commanders inside her pavilion for their council.”

Daenerys is a quick study (for example she quickly learned how to count the number of men on a battlefield, became an excellent horserider in a short period of time …), a polyglot (speaking fluently Valyrian, the Dothraki, and the Common Tongue, as well as pretty much all the Valyrian dialects of Free Cities), and a bookworm (“Bring me the book I was reading last night.” She wanted to lose herself in the words, in other times and other places. The fat leather-bound volume was full of songs and stories from the Seven Kingdoms. Children’s stories, if truth be told; too simple and fanciful to be true history. All the heroes were tall and handsome, and you could tell the traitors by their shifty eyes. Yet she loved them all the same.”)

She went to help the sick people who were suffering from an epidemic diseaseoutside of Meereen although everyone was against the idea: “Go if you wish, ser. I will not detain you. I will not detain any of you.” Dany vaulted down from the horse. “I cannot heal them, but I can show them that their Mother cares.” Jhogo sucked in his breath. “Khaleesi, no.” The bell in his braid rang softly as he dismounted. “You must not get any closer. Do not let them touch you! Do not!” Dany walked right past him.”

One night she went to sleep beneath the stars on the grass of her terrace, because she couldn’t fall asleep in her bed: “The pale pink light of dawn found her still out on her terrace, asleep upon the grass beneath a blanket of fine dew.” I love this small passage because of its softness (blanket of dew is a beautiful imagery, I want an art of this scene). It also shows her connection with nature, and her desire for simple things. Daenerys doesn’t need or want luxury, she is not a worldly person. She had her pyramid and and all the riches the city could offer but instead she felt more comfortable sleeping on grass. This passage came directly after Dany thought that Meereen could never be her home too. I think it’s symbolic - Daenerys wants a simple, peaceful home, and the grass here represents that.  

I love her :)

#Daenerys Targaryen #Mirri Maz Duur #gotdaenerystargaryen #asoiaf meta #asoiaf #text post #minemeta #Anonymous

[celluloidmusings]

In the End, More of the Same

2 out of 5 Stars (because I’m in a good mood)

Anyone who’s read the Robert B. Parker novels about the lovably honorable private investigator, Spenser (with an “s”), will likely suffer irreversible dismay within the first few seconds of Spenser Confidential, Netflix’s shameless misappropriation of the private eye’s namesake. That’s because the latter bears no resemblance to the former.

First off, Parker’s Spenser (with an “s,” in case you’ve forgotten), a former California state trooper turned private investigator, never went to prison. He also never wandered the streets of Boston without any means of gainful employment, which Wahlberg’s character seems to have no trouble in doing. Moreover, Spenser in Netflix world is a crass, knuckle-dragging buffoon, in stark contrast to the Spenser in Parker world, who is cerebral, mild-mannered, honorable. The decision to diverge so completely and unequivocally from the seminal character is both baffling and exasperating. But in all fairness, it is a movie, and unless you’re willing to overlook such trivialities, you’ll likely never fully appreciate the rest of the film’s abject absurdity.

The story opens with Wahlberg recounting in his customary leaden monotone the events that have resulted in his five-year incarceration—a spontaneous beat down of his former boss, Captain Boylan (Michael Gaston), an abusive, corrupt cop who has finally gotten on our antihero’s last evanescent nerve. We then cut to a bespectacled Spenser, clearly wiser for his suffering, sitting in prison, surrounded by fellow ne’er-do-wells whose intentions are as hard to read as the permanent scowls on their faces. A predictable confrontation erupts—because, as we all know, no one likes cops, even bad ones, in prison—leaving Spenser, bloodied and sporting a shank in the kidney, none the worse for the wear (must be the sun salutations he’s been doing in his cell each morning).

Upon his release, he’s harried by cops who clearly have difficulty scaling the Big Blue Wall, and decides his best option is to leave Boston altogether and move to Arizona, where his plans include driving a big rig and contemplating sunsets. But before that can happen—insert totally unexpected plot complication—Spenser becomes embroiled in the sudden murders of his old boss and a young officer working in some vague capacity as an informant for the FBI. The plot thickens like molasses.

Having recently been released from prison for assaulting his superior and subsequently threatened by the entire Boston police department, Spenser decides to put his ambitions to become a truck driver on hold and remain in the city where virtually everyone hates his guts. Naturally. He recruits his former boxing coach, Henry, played by veteran actor Alan Arkin, along with an up-and-coming fighter named Hawk, portrayed with suitable reserve by relative newcomer Winston Duke as a character whose reluctance to get involved in a serious police matter represents the sole instance of common sense in the entire film (spoiler: it doesn’t last). On the periphery, though never out of view, is ex-girlfriend Cilly (played with exuberant abandon by IIiza Schlesinger), an acerbic-tongued bombshell whose life as the long-suffering girl of a guy who can’t control his temper has been derailed. Exactly what that life is is anyone’s guess, though it appears to involve lots of dogs.

Her anger at Spenser is manifest, evinced by an incessant string of insults and a quick romp in the men’s room. Perhaps the writers (Sean O’Keefe and Brian Helgeland) are trying to tell us something profound here about the nature of forgiveness, or horniness, or some such nonsense, or, more likely, simply straddling us with yet another limpid sex scene in the time-honored tradition of Hollywood gratuitous sex. Either way, it’s hardly enough to rescue this disaster of a film from its own folly.

What ensues is a farcical dramedy in the tradition of such memorable gems as Bad Boys, Starsky and Hutch, Tango and Cash, and The Other Guys, another Wahlberg buddy film. The movie’s premise, and, we must assume, its raison d’etre, rests on a highly convoluted, plodding plot involving drug traffickers, mobsters, and of course dirty cops, all looking to get their honest share of the profits from a new casino set to be installed at an old, abandoned dog track known as Wonderland (the title of the Spenser novel by Ace Atkins). The obvious culpability of Spenser’s former partner, Driscoll (played by Bokeem Woodbine), is one of the film’s more subtle attributes, though one can hardly fault screenwriters O’Keefe (Lair, Pursuit Force) and Helgeland (Man on Fire, 42, L.A. Confidential) for including a stereotypical villain in an otherwise stereotypical film. As for Wahlberg, whose acting chops are on prominent display in such worthy films as The Fighter, Invincible, and Boogie Nights, his rote performance here is what we have come to expect from a seemingly overweening infatuation with silly, mindless entertainment: emotionless dialogue, shirtless posturing, and clumsily executed stunts. One wonders if this reflects Wahlberg’s own aesthetic tastes or a dismal lack of quality scripts. Perhaps both.

Despite an experienced and capable ensemble of cast and crew, Spenser Confidential ultimately fails as even a marginally entertaining brand of pure escapism. It does, however, remind us of a nearly universal truth: books are typically better than the movies they inspire, however obliquely. As a book lover myself, might I suggest you skip this hackneyed tale and visit your local library instead and check out a few of Robert Parker’s novels. They’re well worth the trip and, if nothing else, will spare you 111 minutes of wondering why you’re still watching a movie as pointless as this one.

[spooky-ghostwriter]

Dressed to Kill - Chapter Nine

<– Previous Chapter

Next Chapter –>

Tsukiko parted the curtains of her trailer window. It had been a full day's drive around Lake Erie. All of the driving had been done by non-performer employees – particularly those with the drivers' licenses that Tsukiko herself lacked – so from her perspective, it had been a fairly uneventful period. Still, despite not having any of the stress that she imagined came with driving around trailers full of ghost lions and elephants, she was happy to see that they'd arrived at their destination.

Tsukiko hadn't considered it at first, but in retrospect, it had been incredibly obvious – circus performers' trailers were not large. Her new bed was smaller than she was used to and even it took up a good third of her available space.

Still, her trailer had felt empty. Her bedroom at her parents' house had had Gary's enclosure as a centerpiece, but now Tsukiko's snake was in the care of Pierre and his crew. The props and costumes that had once littered her room's floor were now in storage somewhere. Tsukiko had to admit, they were likely more organized than she'd ever kept them.

And so, Tsukiko's trailer contained only a bed and a mini-fridge; both of which were already in the trailer when she'd walked in. She made a mental note to see how Galen was using his trailer's space and copy it.

As she sat on her bed, imagining the walls covered in posters, there was a knock at the door.

Oh, speak of the devil, Tsukiko thought.

She pushed open the door. As the thought was still on her mind, she greeted her visitor with a question. “Hey Galen, would it be weird to put a picture of Gary on my wall?”

Vercingetorix blinked.

“Oh, you're not Galen,” Tsukiko realized.

“Indeed I am not,” Vercingetorix confirmed. “Gary is your snake, right?”

“...Yes,” Tsukiko admitted.

“You're free to do whatever you want with your trailer, as long as we can still move it from city to city,” Vercingetorix explained. “Most performers here decorate their trailers with mementos from their favourite or most important shows.”

Suddenly remembering the reason he was there, Vercingetorix opened the briefcase he was holding. It was the very same metal briefcase that Vercingetorix had held the Tank Top in. For a moment, Tsukiko was breathless – she imagined the wonders of a second Religalia that Vercingetorix might give to her.

“I have the schedule for this week's shows.” Vercingetorix passed a stapled set of papers to Tsukiko. “You'll be performing one show a day.”

“O-okay...”

“Is something the matter?” Vercingetorix asked. “If you're worried about having fewer shows than the other performers, that's just because you're new. Once you're used to the routine, we'll bring you up to an alternating schedule of two shows one day, one show the next.”

“No, it's not that,” Tsukiko tossed the schedule onto her bed. “It's just that...” She scratched the back of her head, trying to word her question appropriately. “Is the schedule really the most important thing right now?”

“Of course!” Vercingetorix said, sounding affronted. “One cannot have a circus without some semblance of order.”

“What about the plant monsters?”

“Dryads.”

“Whatever. What are we doing about them?”

“It's a little cool for dryads this morning,” Vercingetorix said, looking up to the overcast. “I don't think they'll be a problem.”

“You don't think – ” Tsukiko stammered. She sighed. “Okay. Fine. I don't want to fight any plant monsters anyway. But can you at least show me the other Religalia?”

Vercingetorix nodded to himself. “I suppose. Meet me at Stage 1 during Pierre's show. I'll make some time.”

Stage 1 was the largest of the four. The tent around it stood almost 40 feet in the air; it was the beacon that attracted people to the circus as a whole. Two towers of scaffolding held the tent in place, with a large 'Alesia Circus' logo between them. The stage covered most of the available space, with seating for over 700. Tsukiko would have loved to watch Pierre lead his ghost lions around – or, for that matter, to perform on the stage herself. Instead, she stood backstage, awaiting Vercingetorix.

Still, even if the sights and sounds eluded her, the smells and tastes were up for grabs. Tsukiko passed the time by shoveling caramel corn into her mouth as fast as her unfortunate need to chew and swallow would allow.

Finally, a few handfuls into her third bag, Vercingetorix stepped out of the Stage 1 tent.

“Ah, there you are,” Vercingetorix said, noticing her.

Tsukiko swallowed two cheeks' worth of caramel corn.

“Free circus food is one of the greatest perks of working here, wouldn't you say?” Vercingetorix asked.

“This is the best caramel corn I've ever eaten!” Tsukiko said, pointing ecstatically at the few kernels remaining. “What's your secret?”

“It's not something that should be disclosed to the public,” Vercingetorix said, his voice suddenly low and ominous. “But, sufficed to say, dryads come in many shapes and sizes.”

Tsukiko pictured five ears of corn stacking together to create a behemoth, just as the pumpkins had. With no emotion on her face, she dropped her current handful of kernels back into the bag.

“I'm joking,” Vercingetorix said with a smirk. “I don't know what the secret is. And, just like I won't ask how you perform any of your magic tricks, I won't ask our chef how he makes his caramel corn.”

Tsukiko tentatively ate another kernel, but her eyes narrowed in a suspicious glare.

“Now, onto the Religalia,” Vercingetorix said, unlocking his briefcase.

A shiver of eagerness crept up Tsukiko's entire body. The Tank Top had caught her attention even before it transformed into a mobile cannon. She remembered the strange allure it had; some glimmer of specialness emanating from every stitch.

As Vercingetorix reached into the briefcase, she stared at it in anticipation. Finally, he pulled out his hand.

Tsukiko felt her eyes widen.

Vercingetorix held a woolen sweater. It was a garish pink, with a needlessly bright yellow 'J' knitted on the chest. On its sleeves were flame designs that graduated from the same yellow of the 'J' to a bloody crimson.

It was hideous.

“This is the Jumper,” Vercingetorix introduced. “The second Religalia I'd like you to try.”

Tsukiko said nothing, and decided it best to hide her expressions behind a final handful of caramel corn.

“Now,” Vercingetorix continued, oblivious to Tsukiko's pained reaction. “To truly master a Religalia, you must be able to believe in it, no matter how impossible its abilities seem. Think of it like an actor being fully immersed in their role. To get the greatest performance, the actor must believe that they are the character they are trying to represent.”

“Are you sure? I had no idea what the Tank Top would do.”

“Precisely,” said Vercingetorix. “At the moment you activated the Tank Top, your mind was full of desperation, not doubt. You didn't know what the Tank Top would do, but you believed it would do something to save yourself, Galen, and your audience. And no matter how impossible that sounds, you believed it.”

Once again, Tsukiko didn't know how to respond to this. What he said was true, but she couldn't help but feel that he was calling her naive.

“I truly respect that conviction in the impossible,” said Vercingetorix. “The Tank Top is, in fact, one of the hardest Religalia to master. Most people don't believe it can transform into a tank.”

“Even after they see it happen?” Tsukiko asked.

“One's eyes can be deceived. You, of all people, should know that.”

“Well sure, but after fighting living pumpkins, what else is there for people to think is impossible?” Tsukiko asked.

“That is exactly the attitude I was hoping for from you,” said Vercingetorix. He passed Tsukiko the ugly sweater. “That's why I'm not going to try to trick you with this Religalia. I will tell you exactly what the Jumper does, and hopefully, you won't doubt it for an instant.”

Tsukiko turned the garment over in her hands. The back side had another knitted fireball and was no less ugly than the front.

“Try me.”

Galen made his way through the field reserved for Pierre's animals. An L-shaped tent lined one corner, housing the enclosures of a few small animals. As he passed through it, he stopped at the tank that now housed Gary. The snake was coiled under a hollowed rock, but he poked his head out as Galen approached. Gary flicked his tongue up in greeting.

“Hey, buddy,” Galen said softly. “Sorry, I don't have time to play right now. I have to help wash the elephant.”

He was relatively sure that Gary didn't understand what he said, but the python seemed to relax and stretched itself out under its heat lamp.

Along the way, Galen rested his arms on the railing surrounding Pierre's alligator pit. Some shows involved Pierre or an assistant sticking their head in the largest alligator's open jaws. Now, the three of them looked no more dangerous than Gary. In fact, they were stretched out under a bright heat lamp just as Gary was.

Before he could enjoy the view too much, a monkey jumped onto him and grabbed the back of his head. Galen recoiled as the monkey began to howl; he wondered just how much force he could use to remove it without causing it any harm.

While flailing, Galen turned; Pierre was standing a few feet behind him.

Pierre snapped his fingers; the monkey bounced off Galen's head and ran up to sit on Pierre's shoulders.

“Th-thanks,” Galen said, breathlessly. “I don't know what got into that monkey.”

“I told him to do zat,” Pierre said. “You are supposed to be washing ze elephant. Now move!”

Galen muttered some vague apology and ran off.

Betsy the elephant didn't appear to have noticed Galen's lateness. She had a large, fenced-off field to herself, and was frolicking around enjoying the free space while she could. She toyed with a tree branch, swinging it across the autumn leaves on the ground as if raking.

A senior stagehand, by the name of Jeffery, waved both the elephant and Galen onto a raised platform. It was a simple basin that had nothing more than a drain in it, but it was large enough for Betsy to lie down and stretch. Galen and his elder took turns spraying the beast with hoses connected to some water system Galen didn't yet understand.

“You're late, Mark,” said Jeffery, watching Betsy play in what was rapidly becoming mud.

“Sorry about that – ”

“Ah, don't worry about it,” The large, bearded man said cheerfully. Galen mused that, if it weren't for Jeffery's harsh Boston accent, he would have made a perfect Santa Claus. “Did Pierre hit you with the monkey?”

Galen nodded. His boss laughed.

“It's fine. Just don't mistreat any of the animals and he'll warm up to you eventually.”

Galen looked past Betsy to the pen that housed the ghost lions and beyond even that back to the alligator. “I was sort of worried when I heard how many animals were kept here. But it looks like they're all taken care of properly.”

“Of course. Y'know, Pierre is the only reason we're allowed to have an elephant in the first place.”

“Oh?” Galen asked, deciding that continuing the small talk would improve what seemed to be a good first impression.

“Yeah. Pierre started as an exotic vet, then a zookeeper,” said Jeffery. “By the time he joined the circus, he had so many licenses that he can keep any animal he wants. Including some that aren't even supposed to exist.”

“Like ghost lions?”

“Like ghost lions.”

The two of them continued to wash and admire the elephant for a few minutes. Then, Galen saw something out of the corner of his eye.

“Jeff...” Galen said. “How many monkeys does the circus have?”

“Just one. Why?”

Galen now looked in the direction of Stage 1. It was hard to tell from a distance, but it looked like a humanoid figure standing on the 'Alesia Circus' sign.

“Well I'll be,” Jeff said, shading his eyes with his hand. “That's no monkey! That's a person.”

“One of our guys?”

“Must be! But they're supposed to use the crane to take that thing down.” He took the hose from Galen. “I'll finish up here. Go check out what's happening and radio Vercingetorix if there's an issue.”

Galen tapped the walkie-talkie on his belt.

“Got it.”

It was a jog of annoyance that drove Galen across the field to Stage 1. He wondered how someone had even managed to climb the tent, let alone why. It should have taken the crew's cherry-picker to even reach the scaffolding.

Whoever it was, Galen was sure it must have been some determined idiot.

He approached the base of the tent. Galen and the climber were still separated by the entire height of the tent, but they were close enough for him to recognize the climber's long, black hair flowing in the breeze.

“Oh goddammit it's Tsuki,” Galen muttered.

“Hey Galen!” Tsukiko cried from above.

“What are you doing up there?!” Galen demanded. “And how – ”

“Check it out!” Tsukiko said gleefully. She let go of the scaffolding tower and bent her legs.

“No, don't – ”

It was too late. Tsukiko leapt off of the sign. She flew a surprising height before clearing the ten. Then, gravity remembered its place and she began to fall.

Galen's instincts took hold. It was clear where Tsukiko would impact the ground. He sprinted to that spot as fast as he could manage.

As he and Tsukiko both sped towards the point of impact, he heard Tsukiko scream something.

Galen stretched out his arms. He hadn't had time to think about whether or not this would help and, in hindsight, he would realize that it wouldn't.

One loud, painful crash later, Tsukiko and Galen were a collapsed heap.

For a moment, both were silent.

“Why did you catch me?” Tsukiko asked.

“What kind of question is that?”

“No, seriously. Why did you catch me?!” Tsukiko demanded, managing to get herself onto all fours. “You're no softer than the ground!”

“I had to do something,” Galen said, struggling to his feet. “Why did you jump?!”

“Because of this!” Tsukiko stood up fully, then tugged the bottom edge of her fiery pink sweater. “It's the Jumper!”

“It's ugly!”

“I know. But it lets me jump super high. And then not die when I hit the ground.”

“You could've told me that.”

“Believe me, if I knew you were going to try to Superman me, I would've!” Tsukiko rubbed her neck. “I think it only works properly if I land on my feet. And it doesn't protect you at all!”

“You don't say.” Galen muttered, rotating his wrists to ensure they still worked. While doing so, he took a long look at his left hand.

“Hey, Tsuki?” He asked.

“Yeah?”

“Does my pinkie look all right to you?”

Tsukiko looked at Galen's left pinkie. The finger itself looked fine. The angle it was sticking out of his hand did not.

Tsukiko let out a short terrified scream.

“Yeah that's what I thought,” Galen said. “It's just that it doesn't hurt, so I was – ”

Tsukiko released a second, completely identical, scream.

One of the two screams managed to attract Vercingetorix, who sauntered over from the far side of the tent. He looked at Tsukiko's pained expression, then to Galen's more stoic, confused expression. Finally, he noticed Galen's sideways finger.

“Well,” said the manager. “I think it's time to introduce you to the next Religalia. It heals injuries.”

Vercingetorix led Tsukiko, Galen and Galen's dislocated finger to a trailer, very similar to the one Tsukiko had began her day in.

It even had an identical insignia on the front – a stylized top hat and magic wand.

“This where you keep the Religalia?” Tsukiko asked.

“It is.”

“I was expecting something more... I dunno, magical,” Tsukiko said. “Like a wormhole to an alternate dimension where tanks and clothing are one and the same.”

“That is a very healthy imagination you have,” said Vercingetorix. “One moment.”

He stepped into the trailer, closing the door behind him.

“How's the finger?” Tsukiko asked Galen.

“Still sideways. And it still doesn't hurt.” Galen said. In curiosity, he poked it with the index finger of his other hand. In an instant, his face contorted in pain.

“That looked like a bad idea,” Tsukiko said, wincing.

“It was,” Galen said quietly. “It really was.”

In the moment Vercingetorix promised, he emerged from the trailer. He held a pair of red, sparkling shoes. Their hue and sheer size of the heel made Tsukiko think of something Stiletto the knife thrower would wear.

“These,” said Vercingetorix. “Are the High Heals.”

“Of course it's a pun. Sure. How do they work?” Tsukiko asked, taking the shoes. “Do I wear them, or does Galen?”

“You do.”

“Darn,” Tsukiko said, kicking off her current footwear. “The other way would have been way funnier.”

Galen gave her an annoyed look, no doubt exacerbated by the pain in his hand.

“Now, place your hands around Galen's injury like so.” Vercingetorix extended his index fingers and thumbs, tracing a diamond. “You can heal as big of a wound as you need to by spreading your hands further.”

“You should have shown me this one first!” Tsukiko said. She placed her hands as Vercingetorix showed her, ensuring that Galen's distorted pinkie was in the middle of her hand formation. “Now, I just need to believe that it will heal Galen, despite how impossible it seems?”

“You have to click the back of your heels together to activate it, but yes, that is what you must believe.”

Tsukiko closed her eyes and cleared her mind. She concentrated on her breathing, and nothing but the idea that Galen's finger would be repaired. Then, she clicked her heels.

She felt a slight shifting in her footwear, as she had with the Tank Top. She opened her eyes slightly to allow herself a brief glance at her feet. Wires emerged from the High Heals' lining. They slithered down around her ankle and conglomerated on the shoes' toe box. In seconds, each shoe had a shining silver cross on Tsukiko's toes.

“This is incredible,” Galen said. He watched in awe as his finger twisted back into place. In an instant, his finger was back to normal. He curled and extended it a few times, without any pain. “You need to tell hospitals about this!”

“We can't do that,” Vercingetorix said solemnly.

“Why not?” Tsukiko asked. “You can't just keep something like this locked up in a trailer!”

“No one knows how to make another set of High Heals,” Vercingetorix explained. “I'm sure you understand that dissecting a pair of shoes looking for some miracle cure would only risk damaging the Religalia.”

“Have you studied them at all?” Galen asked.

“Of course, but all we have learned are that they have some limitations.” Vercingetorix held up fingers as he listed, “Number one – they cannot cure diseases, even the mildest stomachache. Number two – they cannot heal injuries that are too old. We're not sure what the cutoff is, but it seems that injuries that the body has already begun to heal of its own accord are unaffected by the High Heals' power. Number three – they cannot replenish blood. They will fix the damaged tissue and prevent further blood loss, but someone who has lost too much blood already will still die. And, of course, number four – they cannot bring someone back from death.”

“The shoes are still pretty far above modern medicine,” Galen said, still enchanted by his working finger. “I still think you need to take them to a hospital.”

“And tell them what? That a circus has magic footwear that can mend broken bones?” Vercingetorix asked. “In the past, we did take the shoes around hospitals. Unfortunately, the surgeons thought we had planted fake injured victims as a publicity stunt. Quite a frustrating affair.”

Vercingetorix shook his head.

“You're welcome to try, whenever we're set up close enough to a hospital,” He said. “Just don't be late for your shows. Hospitals have doctors that can help patients without you, but we need you here for your magic shows.”

“Believe me, I won't be late,” Tsukiko promised. “In fact... I think I'm going to go get ready for the next show.”

She looked back at Galen.

“Come find me when you're done washing elephants or whatever!” She said cheerfully. Then she departed, bouncing dozens of feet into the air. After a few leaps across the field, she vanished completely out of sight.

Galen watched her depart, then sighed, staring at his finger.

“Is something troubling you, Galen?” Vercingetorix asked. “Your finger is back to normal, isn't it?”

“It's completely fine,” said Galen, wiggling it to make sure.

“Then what's the matter?”

Galen leaned against the banister of the trailer's stairs. He looked across the field, and in the distance, he saw a shape that looked distinctly like Tsukiko leaping a few dozen feet into the air.

“Tsukiko and I are partners,” Galen said. “She's said it before – that her magic shows wouldn't be as good without me. It really meant a lot to me to hear that.”

“Oh?”

“Do you ever feel jealous of the circus performers?” Galen asked. “Well, maybe jealous isn't the right word, but – ”

Vercingetorix nodded before Galen could even think of a way to reword his question.

“The performers are truly something special,” said Vercingetorix. “They do things that no one else can possibly comprehend. Myself and the crewmembers, we tend to sit on the sidelines and watch the magic. We are, to be blunt, ordinary people. However close we are to them, it can feel like we're worlds apart.”

“Yeah. I know what you mean,” Galen said. “But I wasn't always so far away, you know? Tsukiko and I were... eight, I think, when we met. Even then, she could do card tricks and sleight of hand. But I understood all of that. I only learned the tricks I needed to do, and even then I was never as good at them as she was, but it was always possible.”

Vercingetorix continued to nod.

“Now there are all these Religalia in the mix,” Galen continued. “And now she's jumping fifty feet in the air and healing my broken finger and...”

“And turning into a tank.”

“Especially turning into a tank! How's an ordinary person like me supposed to keep up?”

“Tell me, Galen,” said Vercingetorix. “Why did you decide to be Tsukiko's partner in magic? And why did she decide she wanted you over anyone else?”

Galen shook his head.

“I can't answer the second one. I mean, I don't get stage fright and we can bounce jokes off each other. Maybe that's all it is.”

“Well then, what about the first question? Why did you get into stage magic with Tsukiko?”

Galen paused. He had thought this would be the simpler question to answer, but he had to think back to each and every magic show he'd been a part of to find his answer.

“It's fun,” Galen said simply, a faint smile on his face. “I wouldn't have thought of doing it if it weren't for Tsukiko, but it really is fun. Tsukiko once tried to describe it as showing people impossible, amazing things, and letting them forget how boring reality is. I thought it was silly at the time she said that, but I guess that's really what we do.”

“And now she's doing what even you think is impossible.”

“Yeah. It's like I'm just an audience member now.”

“The thing is, Galen, the things Tsukiko does now are feel as impossible to her as they look to you. It's her conviction that makes it possible.”

“And the Religalia.”

“Well, here's a much simpler question,” said Vercingetorix. “Do you have the same conviction as Tsukiko? If you were to wear a Religalia, do you think you could make it respond to you?”

Galen turned to look at Vercingetorix, eyes wide.

“Are you asking what I think you're asking?”

Vercingetorix smiled.

“There are a couple Religalia left,” Vercingetorix said. “Two of them even have the dubious tradition of being worn by the magician's assistant as opposed to the magician herself.”

Galen paused.

“Why didn't you start off by telling me that?”

“I was curious,” Vercingetorix said with a shrug. “I wondered if your thoughts were the same as those of their previous owner.”

“Oh? Who was their previous owner?”

Vercingetorix scratched his chin. It was a contemplative reply when he said, “The man gave up his magician's assistant ways many years ago. And considering how he, like you, tended to give the fame to the magician herself, I think he may prefer to remain anonymous for the time being.”

“Doesn't sound exactly like me, then,” Galen said. With a grin, he added, “I told Tsuki I'd steal her show at some point.”

Vercingetorix laughed. “Let's see how well that translates into a conviction in the impossible, shall we?”

#dressed to kill #tsukiko #original fiction

[talhaghafoor2019-blog]

Best Music Videos of the 21st Century: Billboard Critics Pick 100

At the dawn of the 21st century, the music video was in a boom period: The TRL era was still at its zenith, CDs were flying out of the stores, budgets for music videos were still regularly in the seven-digit range, and MTV was the place you turned to in order to see the latest clips from pop's best and brightest.

Flash forward to 2018, and none of those things are true anymore. Album sales have been depleted by the rise of downloading and then streaming, MTV has been supplanted by the Internet as the video's primary home, and attempts to reboot TRL only prove how different times are now than when Backstreet and Britney ruled the world. But with all that's changed, the music video still reigns paramount in the pop world, as a conversation-starter, as a starmaker, as a cementer of legacy. Though the ways we consume music videos in 2018 would've been almost unthinkable at century's start, the impact they have on our lives and pop culture remains relatively similar. 

But of course, it's been an interesting ride for the music video to get to this point: From the tail end of MTV's peak to the introduction of YouTube and the minting of the viral star to the rise of social media and the countless different forms the video can now take in 2018. This week, Billboard is reflecting on the evolution of the music video with a week's worth of content about the form's past, present and future -- starting, today, with a list of our staff picks for the 100 greatest music videos of the century so far, essentially telling the story of the form during its middle-age period, and a potential crisis ultimately averted. 

See our staff favorites below, with a YouTube playlist of all available clips at the bottom, and get lost in the recent greatest hits of an artform that continues to be among popular culture's most vital.

100. Fall Out Boy, "Sugar We're Goin Down" (dir. Matt Lenski, 2005)

From Under the Cork Tree’s lead single was much of the world’s introduction to these former hardcore punks from the Chicago burbs, and for their first video with a big ol’ Island Records budget, they indulged their mission statement: a full-on underdog’s folk tale. Our small town teenaged protagonist is a sort of Napoleon Dynamite with -- get this! -- deer-like antlers, an effective stand-in for just about any condition that could have left a young Fall Out Boy feeling socially alienated. His love interest’s shotgun-wielding father doesn’t approve, but in the end, let’s just say he’s behooved to sympathize. -- CHRIS PAYNE

The video for Shakira’s first English-language hit is not her most seen; those honor belong to the Maluma-featuring “Chantaje" and World Cup anthem “Waka Waka (This Time for Africa)," both with around two billion YouTube views. But “Whenever, Wherever” was the video that introduced Shakira’s swiveling hips to the world, as well as her “small and humble” breasts. The minimalist production, which memorably featured Shakira dancing alone without props, musicians or other dancers, was enough to catapult her to international stardom. -- LEILA COBO

Ana Matronic, Jake Shears, and the rest of the crew served up a brilliant DIY instructional dance video for their unlikely viral hit, which became their third No. 1 hit on the U.S. Dance Club Songs chart in 2012. The smartly staged and creatively choreographed one-take clip is as unpolished, campy, and full of energy as the Scissors themselves. -- PATRICK CROWLEY

The room full of glasses of water gently quaking to the bass drum heartbeat of "Rolling in the Deep," like Jurassic Park to the tenth power, was appropriately foreboding for what Adele's 21 ended up being, a commercial behemoth the likes of which was supposed to have long gone extinct. It all starts here: Director Sam Brown capturing the once-in-a-generation vocalist at simultaneously her most vulnerable and her most powerful, unclear if the wreckage surrounding her is representative of her internal turmoil, or a direct result of it. -- ANDREW UNTERBERGER​

96. Frank Ocean, "Pyramids" (dir. Nabil Elderkin, 2012)

Opening with color bars, liquor shots, and gun blasts, this Nabil-directed 8-minute odyssey follows a zonked-out Frank Ocean as he zips across the desert on a motorcycle, giggles his way through a strip club, and runs into John Mayer in the middle of nowhere for a woozy, bluesy guitar solo. Landing somewhere between Lost Highway and Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, "Pyramids" is a dusty, neon-drenched vision quest that's hard to shake. – JOE LYNCH

Music videos can sometimes feel unimaginative when they simply translate a song’s lyrics into a four-minute clip, but for the Avalanches’ “Frontier Psychiatrist,” the literal approach also happened to be the wildest one. The Australian electronic group’s mishmash of vocal samples is acted out as theater, with dueling therapists, chattering dentures, an old guy with a turtle body, and a ghost chorus comprising a visual representation both surreal and enduring. -- JASON LIPSHUTZ

94. Ariana Grande feat. Zedd, "Break Free" (dir. Chris Marrs Piliero, 2014)

“Brace yourself for something so fantastically fantastical that you’ll soil yourself from intergalactic excitement" reads part of the tongue-in-cheek Star Wars-style scroll that introduces Ariana Grande’s video for “Break Free." The stakes in this outer space-based video are as high as Grande’s ponytail, as she uses her blaster to shoot down guards and free prisoners. But wait! Ari herself has been taken captive! Will she... break free?! Yes, and then she will board a spaceship where Zedd is both captain and DJ. Phew. -- CHRISTINE WERTHMAN

The video for Aaliyah’s sinuous “Rock the Boat” might have easily gone down as just one of the many examples of the beloved singer’s preternatural cool and low-key sex appeal, featuring Aaliyah leading an all-female ensemble in understatedly sexy moves mirroring the song’s hypnotic, undulating melody. But it’s impossible to watch without feeling a deep pang of sadness: Directly after filming this video, Aaliyah and eight others were killed in a plane crash over the Bahamas. “Rock the Boat” begins with an in memoriam of sorts, and as the video starts, Aaliyah walks on a deserted beach beneath a sky so beatifically sunlit, it could very well be heaven. The video ends with a gorgeous shot of her swimming alone, trailed by billowy silk, toward a surface that seems contiguous with the clouds. In between, we’re reminded of an artist who was an effortlessly entrancing dancer and singer, a happy young woman with so much ahead of her -- before she floats off to somewhere else. -- REBECCA MILZOFF

92. Girls' Generation, "Gee" (dir. Cho Soo-hyun,  2009)

One of the biggest K-pop hits ever, Girls’ Generation’s saccharine electro-pop anthem “Gee” was key to making the nonet one of South Korea’s biggest pop acts, largely thanks to its video’s living mannequins, viral “crab” dance, and  brightly hued outfits. The success of it led to the group releasing further videos that rank among K-pop’s all-time most recognizable, including “Genie” and “I Got A Boy,” but nothing will ever replace this 2009 music video for its critical spot in the genre's history. -- TAMAR HERMAN

It would have been understandably tempting to make a video that interpreted the song as literally as songwriter Lori McKenna intended: As a message to her children. But instead, the clip -- with assistance from OWN’s series Belief (thanks, Oprah!) and McGraw’s understated delivery -- turns the tune into a grander prayer that celebrates our universal humanity and diversity through scenes of people from all ethnicities and religions. -- MELINDA NEWMAN

90. Marina & The DIamonds, "How to Be a Heartbreaker" (dir. Marc & Ish, 2012)

Six years ago, Marina Diamandis gave us a video with six showering Calvin Klein models juxtaposed with a clothed woman, gloriously flipping what is unfortunately still the modern standard. (Each guy is wearing a Speedo, mind you.) As she sings about her guide to breaking you-know-whats, Marina alternates between cozying up to different gentlemen, dancing in the shower, and presenting a severed, bloodied mannequin head on a platter to the camera. It’s hard to know who you’re supposed to be drooling over in this visual -- Marina, or the male models? -- and that’s the whole point. -- GAB GINSBERG

Mitski’s songwriting is often spiked with a dark, sharp sense of humor. The visual for her shrugging, contemplative Puberty 2 single “Your Best American Girl,” directed by longtime collaborator Zia Anger, brings that wit to the forefront, trapping the Japanese-American artist in a love triangle with an all-too-familiar cute white hipster and his Coachella-ready girlfriend as the song’s lyrics muse on cultural clashes and ethnic identity. It’s hard not to roll your eyes as the couple cuddles naked under an American flag (seriously, guys?), leaving our heroine to make out with her own hand like a lovesick middle-schooler, channeling rage into electric guitar. Not too much subtlety here, but the video’s almost uncomfortably on-the-nose references are exactly what make it so brilliant, with just the right dose of funny. -- TATIANA CIRISANO

Kanye West would be the first to tell you he’s more than just an artist -- he’s an innovator, on the same intellectual playing field as Walt Disney and Steve Jobs. And when it comes to visual manifestations of or companion pieces to his music, well, he’s not always totally wrong. The video for “Flashing Lights” isn’t as dazzling or frenzied as videos for hits like “Gold Digger” and “All of the Lights,” but the tension between the thump of the song and the slow-mo, one-shot portrait of a beautiful woman committing heinous acts of violence makes the clip as unsettlingly hypnotic as the trance-like intonation of its chorus. -- STEVEN J. HOROWITZ

87. David Bowie, "Lazarus" (dir. Johan Renck, 2016)

Shortly after David Bowie succumbed to liver cancer on Jan. 10, 2016, his longtime producer and friend Tony Visconti wrote in a Facebook tribute, “His death was not different from his life – a work of Art.”  He most certainly was referring to “Blackstar” and “Lazarus,” the haunting and bleak final two music videos that the legend left behind. Both are rich with references to Bowie canon -- Major Tom, Station to Station -- and optimally should be seen in tandem. But “Lazarus” delivers the bigger gut punch because it is Bowie’s acknowledgement that he is not long for this earth, a video cut with scenes of the gaunt artist writhing on what could be his deathbed, his head wrapped in a bandage with buttons for eyes. Watch the video, then venturedown the rabbit hole of Bowie-ologists deconstructing the video’s meaning: The Starman may have left the building, but he did so in a way that insures his artistic immortality. -- FRANK DIGIACOMO

"Lazy Sunday" has the distinction of being the only video on this list to originate from television -- the historic first official Digital Short on SNL, preceding future classics like "I'm On A Boat" and "Dick in a Box," and setting the template for the first wave of YouTube viral videos. "Lazy Sunday" lives on in infamy because of the sheer ridiculousness of their investment in the song's mundanity: Andy Samberg and Chris Parnell rap about going to see The Chronicles of Narnia, but not before "macking on some cupcakes" from Magnolia Bakery and shouting out answers to movie theater Matthew Perry trivia. Part of the video's allure is its low-production quality -- it looks like it was shot by high schoolers in an afternoon -- going to show that you don't need a million-dollar budget to make a classic music video. Perhaps all you need is a camcorder and smartly dumb lyrics. -- XANDER ZELLNER

Grimes made all our cyberpunk dreams come true with the “Kill v. Maim” video. The singer previously explained that the song’s inspiration was for a fictional movie that was “a mixture of Godfather and Twilight,” but the video itself transports the viewer into a wild post-apocalyptic world: Imagine if Final Fantasy took place in the Mad Max universe... but was also shot in Harajuku in the ‘90s. And what better way to end this giddy mix of cult-film homages than with an ode to Blade’s bloody rave scene? -- BIANCA GRACIE

It's as vivid a straightforward rendering of song narrative as 21st-century music video has produced, with Alicia Keys and fictional love interest Mos Def acting out Keys' Songs in A Minor melodrama as a brilliant blur of fantasy and reality. Director Chris Robinson's sumptuous New York visuals make the theatrics pop with both pleasing familiarity and near-uncomfortable intimacy, lifting you into Keys' daydream -- right up to the crushing ending, when it turns out that Mos never will know just how different she looks outside of her work clothes. -- A.U.

Residente -- and prior to him, Calle 13 -- has long been known for his gritty, graphic, often violent video material. But his softer, romantic side is even more compelling, and the second video from his 2017 self-titled solo outing is drenched in love, the kind that sends shivers down your spine. Filmed in Paris' iconic Crémerie-Restaurant Polidor bistro and starring Charlotte Le Bon and Edgar Ramirez, "Descencuentro" (directed by Residente himself) is a mini-film about a man and a woman whose inevitable encounter inside the restaurant is delayed by a string of happenstance that goes from accidental to comical. “I wanted to stay away from clichés, but stay close to hope, to what motivates you to keep on trying in the midst of so many setbacks,” Residente told Billboard. The end result is breathtakingly (and unexpectedly) lovely. -- L.C.

If a music video can leave you with one indelible image, it’s done good work. The video for “Papi Pacify" is one of the most erotic clips in recent memory, opening with a silent shot of a tall, brawny man with one hand around twigs' throat and the other curling at her mouth. “It’s meant to ask questions of the viewer,” co-director Tom Beard told The Guardian. “Who’s got the control in this relationship? Who’s got the power?” There’s no unbraiding the sexual charge from the discomfort, just as there’s no forgetting the shot at 2:23, when twigs holds your gaze as the man takes his fingers from her mouth and pulls her into his chest as she continues to stare, looking nothing if not serene. -- ROSS SCARANO

81. A$AP Rocky, "Peso" (dir. Abteen Bagheri, 2010)

The low-budget street video, shot in the artist’s neighborhood, is a hip-hop staple, and one of the best 21st century entries in the genre drops you in Harlem for an annunciation. Is there a more invigorating entrance in contemporary rap than Rocky busting through a sticker-covered bodega door wearing a black baseball cap that reads FUNERAL, while rapping, “I be that pretty motherfucker”? The money spent shows up in the form of Rick Owens, Raf Simons and Supreme, but the swag is priceless. -- R.S.

80. Miley Cyrus, "We Can't Stop" (dir. Diane Martel, 2013)

There’s tiptoeing into a new era, and then there’s diving in headfirst: Following her underperforming Can’t Be Tamed album, Miley Cyrus chose the latter in 2013, reinventing herself in the first video from the Bangerz campaign and boldly kickstarting her adult career. The “We Can’t Stop” video features a house party full of debauchery and twerking, but for all of the hip-hop excess Cyrus was clearly cribbing from, Diane Martel's clip also provides several uniquely off-kilter set pieces, from the giant-teddy-bear-backpack dance sequence to the game of kick-the-french-fry-skull. -- J. Lipshutz

79. Madonna, "Hung Up" (dir. Johan Renck, 2006)

Faced with relationship trouble, a pop queen doesn’t cry it out -- she dances it out. Madonna’s ‘80s-infused video for the ABBA-borrowing Confessions On A Dance Floor smash “Hung Up” turns the star’s sweaty, solo aerobics workout into a therapy session where all you need to squelch anxiety is a pink leotard and a boombox. The visual only gets better as it expands to scenes resembling a Los Angeles street corner, a subway car, and a Chinese restaurant, where crowds of all ages, races, and ethnicities erupt into fiery dance battles of their own. Meant as a tribute to John Travolta’s ubiquitous dance roles in film, the whole thing ends (how else?) with Madonna breaking it down on an arcade Dance Dance Revolution machine -- not bad for a star who broke several bones in a horseback-riding accident just weeks before shooting. -- T.C.

These days, it might be hard for many viewers to get past the first word of the title when watching the video for Toby Keith's highest-charting, least-resistible Hot 100 hit, especially considering the cameo-strewn close featuring fellow Red-alligned rocker Ted Nugent, among others. But the 2011 clip is such a clever and pure distillation of the forever unpartisan joys of filling your cup, lifting it up and proceeding to parrr-tayyyyyy that it'll make you seethe with nostalgia for a time, perhaps only imagined, when a superior brand of kegger supplies was all you needed to reach across the aisle for. -- A.U.

Behold one of the few instances in which a music video helped launch a relatively unknown act to No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100. Gotye's haunting "Somebody That I Used to Know" visual shows the frontman and duet partner Kimbra naked in front of a blank backdrop, then slowly painted over via stop-motion animation, a living artifact of what used to be a relationship. The design, inspired by an actual work done by Gotye's father, Frank De Backer, took 23 hours and helped the video surpass the 1 billion-views mark on YouTube. -- X.Z.

ANOHNI’s 2016 solo debut Hopelessness combined dazzling experimental pop with the sort of radical social activism most prominent musicians are too timid to approach. For this Hudson Mohawke- and Oneohtrix Point Never-produced song, ANOHNI sings from the perspective of a nine year-old Afghani girl whose family has just been killed by a drone bomb, her despair sending her atop a mountain to demand she be taken next. In the gripping, exquisitely produced video (bankrolled by Apple in a move ANOHNI later regretted), a teary-eyed Naomi Campbell gives a sublime performance, lip-synching and tantalizingly dancing along to the this glistening dirge while a team of dancers contorts around her.  -- C.P.

75. Kendrick Lamar, "i" (dir. Alexandre Moors, 2014)

If this video had come out even two years later, the dance that Kendrick rolls out throughout the visual might have spawned enough challenge/meme copies to send it all the way to the top of the charts, rather than the mere No. 39 it topped out at on the Hot 100. As it stands, the video is a clever nod to both the song's influences -- sampled artist Ronald Isley is in on the party throughout, while George Clinton makes a nonchalant cameo reading a copy of his own autobiography outside a club -- and to the darker forces underlying the song's self-love ethos. -- DAN RYS

74. Dua Lipa, "New Rules" (dir. Henry Scholfield, 2017)

Some new new rules: 1. Launch a thousand Pinterest boards with a beachy pastel color scheme and an enviable hotel slumber party. 2. Take unlikely inspiration from the animal kingdom with head-bobbing choreography meant to evoke the fidgety movements of a pack of flamingos. (No, really!) 3. Embrace the storytelling power of repetition for a dance routine whose third-act twist still delights as much as it did the first time. Follow those steps, and you'll earn admission to YouTube’s billion-views club — and maybe fast-track yourself to a level of international superstardom that half a dozen prior singles couldn’t snag. -- NOLAN FEENEY

73. Janelle Monáe feat. Big Boi, "Tightrope" (dir. Wendy Morgan, 2010)

To those who are just discovering the genius of Janelle Monae with her Dirty Computer rollout: Where have you been? From her futuristic "Many Moons" video to her uncomfortably direct "Cold War" clip, Monáe has consistently delivered on the visuals. "Tightrope" showcases Monae's swagger-for-days as she gyrates through an insane asylum, rocking her early-career androgynous style and delivering some impressive soft-shoe. -- P.C.

72. Sum 41, "Fat Lip" (dir. Marc Klasfeld, 2001)

From its opening beatbox freestyle to its closing tongue wag, "Fat Lip" couldn't have been a better encapsulation of the pop-punk '00s if it had been directed by a sentient Hot Topic bracelet: It's all shaved heads, half-pipes, convenience stores, and four-star frosted tips, as the snottiest bunch of snots that ever snotted perform from a literal pit of dirt. For extra flat-sole kicks, check the hair-metal-homaging "Pain for Pleasure" outro that often played with "Fat Lip" on MTV, proving that adolescent rawk brattiness knows no generation gap. -- A.U.

No music video director works sleight-of-film better than Michel Gondry, the guy who turned a countryside train voyage into Chemical Brothers sheet music or a theatrical Björk drama into a cinematic matryoshka doll. But his greatest cinematic achievement may remain Kylie Minogue's four-lap trek around the streets of Paris, with Kylie and her universe's neighbors somehow layering on top of themselves each time she passes Go. It's a marvel that remains magical 16 years later -- though one that might make you reticent to accept her titular invitation, since it seems like her World barely has room for one of you, let alone four. -- A.U.

70. Ozuna, "Se Preparo" (dir. Nuno Gomes, 2017)

Ozuna is Latin music’s current master of the video universe: The Puerto Rican reggaeton/trap star has so many great videos to his name, it’s hard to settle on a favorite. But “Se Preparo,” with its mix of whimsy and edge, is as fun as the song is compelling. Directed by Venezuelan video master Nuno Gomez, who delights in storytelling, it sets the stage for the wronged girl, who, to forget her boyfriend’s infidelities, preps for a night on the town with the girls. Except it’s actually an elaborate ruse to get even -- one that keeps you watching till the hilarious end. -- L.C.

A theme of Jay's work of late has been taking stereotypes and tropes about the black community and forcing them right in front of his audience's faces. Seldom has that ever been more clear than in the "O.J." video, which lifts its inspiration from a set of racist Looney Tunes cartoons from the '40s, casting himself and others in blackface and hammering home the message of the song's lyrics through the visual. It's among the best examples of this in his catalog. -- D.R.

68. Kesha, "Blow" (dir. Chris Marrs Piliero, 2010)

"She was adamant you can't back away from the crazy" was how director Chris Marrs Piliero summarized the Artist Formerly Known as K-Money's approach to the "Blow" video, which sounds about right: Lasers, unicorns, muenster cheese, no-soap-radio jokes, a pre-meme James Van der Beek, and a whole lot of glitter (natch) combine in the "Blow" video for a visual of singular early-'10s lunacy. That the era's cheekiest director and most game pop star only worked together once remains a bummer, but their sole collab remains a slice of pure lactose gold. -- A.U.

“Blood, Sweat & Tears” is the thesis for BTS as a K-pop group whose work is rich for interpretation. The grab-bag of high-art references makes this music video ripe for fan theories. Cut to a museum filled with European Renaissance replications: Michelangelo’s Pietà explodes! Van Goghian sky swirls abound! V jumps off a balcony in front of a painting of the fallen Icarus! Amid this lavish portrait of BTS at the height of their game, one thing is clear: the septet makes K-pop for the thinking fan. -- CAITLIN KELLEY

66. Ludacris feat. Shawnna, "Stand Up" (dir. Dave Meyers, 2003)

The clip for Luda's first Billboard Hot 100 No. 1 is more bizarre than it has any right to be. A kiss from 'Cris makes a woman's ass expand to cartoonish size, after which Luda puts on a Sideshow Bob-sized sneaker to start stomping the dancefloor and bring the house down (literally). At the end of the video, Luda and Shawnna's faces are superimposed onto baby bodies, and we're treated to Baby Luda dancing Ally McBeal-style, before an unlucky woman changes his soiled diaper. Why? Who knows! But when he moved in 2003, we followed, just like that. -- J. Lynch

65. Red Hot Chili Peppers, "Californication" (dir. Jonathan Dayton & Valerie Faris, 2000)

The Red Hot Chili Peppers' video for "Californication" features the quartet navigating everything from the Hollywood Walk of Fame and movie studios to San Francisco and the Sierra Nevada Mountains -- only as avatars of themselves in an imaginary video game, racking up high scores and eventually meeting at the center of the earth. As fun as the stunning and innovative visuals are, it's the juxtaposition with the song's melancholy lyrics that still lingers well after it's Game Over. -- DENISE WARNER

Most everything seems a whole lot more fun in the crazy-colorful, twisted realm of Missy music videos: Even the gossip-fueled, bully-ridden hallways of high school. Back in a pre-social-media 2002, Elliott heard all the whispers about her recent and somewhat drastic weight loss, her sexual orientation, and more, so she channeled her frustration into an eminently danceable track and classic video. Ludacris and Ms. Jade make stellar guest appearances; Tweet, Eve, and Trina keep score as the coolest clique ever in the cafeteria scenes; even Darryl “DMC” McDaniels shows up for a late cameo as a school bus driver.  But then there’s the real stars of the video -- three little girls with better moves than most grown-ups (including now-pro Alyson Stoner), and a closing image that might be Elliott’s most brilliant touch of all: a mural depicting the late Aaliyah, Lisa “Left Eye” Lopez, and Jam Master Jay, reminding her audience that, just maybe, the industry could focus on more important things than gossip, folks. -- R.M.

63. Ciara, "Promise" (dir. Diane Martel, 2006)

Ciara has spent much of her videography trying to defy gravity — consider the Matrix-style back-bend she first debuted with “Goodies” and later honed in clips like “Gimme Dat” and “Like a Boy.” But with a little movie magic, Ciara actually pulled it off for 2006’s “Promise,” turning a microphone stand into a worthy dance partner through a G-rated pole workout that shook its butt in the face of laws of physics. Ciara’s legacy as an artist is as much about her dancing as it is her music, and “Promise,” with its magic mic and the sheer athleticism of Ciara’s hypnotic hip rolls, is the most entertaining distillation of all her talents. -- N.F.

Dougal Wilson directed this single-shot video in which Natasha Khan takes a late-night bike ride with some of her best pals, a foreboding brood of hoodie-wearing guys in creepy animal masks, a la Donnie Darko’s Frank. According to a 2009 interview, Khan wanted the director to model the video after films like E.T.,The Goonies, The Karate Kid, and even the aforementioned Gyllenhaal cult classic, movies that she dubbed “hoodie movies,” because they featured boys wearing hoodies and riding bikes, “a symbolic reference to breaking out of their suburban trappings and going on this journey of self-discovery." Wilson nails the sentiment, only this journey comes with more sick bike tricks. -- C.W.

A year before labeling herself a savage, Rihanna had already proved she was the baddest gal in town with 2015’s “Bitch Better Have My Money” video. The murderous affair, co-directed by the singer and Megaforce, is a menacing “don't fuck with me” message to her real-life former accountant, portrayed here by Hannibal's Mads Mikkelsen. Rihanna and her badass female sidekicks play the stars of their own revenge fantasy film as they torture his rich white wife, and the final scene is nothing short of chilling, with a blood-soaked Rihanna lighting up a joint while resting in a trunk full of cash. -- B.G.

60. Justice, "D.A.N.C.E." (dir. Jonas & Francois, 2007)

Who knew that the video for a song called “D.A.N.C.E.” could be built around two guys… walking… for the entire video… and still be a huge win? Justice’s Gaspard Augé and Xavier de Rosnay stroll through the duo's most popular clip as their t-shirts morph into mesmerizing pop-art displays, capturing the crossover hit’s effervescence through a series of slogans and cartoons. “D.A.N.C.E.” was nominated for video of the year at the 2007 MTV VMAs, turning Justice into dance headliners (pun intended) years before EDM took over every American festival. -- J. Lipshutz

In one continuous three-and-a-half minute shot, Robyn manages to hold your attention in the music video for "Call Your Girlfriend." The video simply shows Robyn dancing and singing in an empty soundstage, wearing a furry top and looking like her own heart has just been shattered, but it feels impossible to look away. The clip was often parodied and recreated after its release, most notably by former SNL cast member Taran Killam, in which he filmed a near-perfect recreation of the video in the show's writers room at 4:00 a.m. -- X.Z.

58. Christina Aguilera, "Beautiful" (dir. Jonas Åkerlund, 2002)

Christina Aguilera eloquently touches on insecurity in the Jonas Åkerlund-directed “Beautiful," as the dark-lit scenes underscore the decimation that occurs when someone is ostracized for being less than perfect: too fat or skinny, ugly, gay. Alone in a sparsely furnished room, Aguilera zeroes in on songwriter/producer Linda Perry’s affirmation that everyone is beautiful, no matter what people say. “Words can’t bring me down,” she sings as the video’s characters conquer their insecurities: one woman bashes in her mirror, another tosses beauty magazines into a fireplace while a gay couple publicly kiss and hold hands. The video won a GLAAD Media Award for its positive portrayal of gay and transgender individuals. -- GAIL MITCHELL

In the pantheon of music videos capturing some sort of ceremonial celebration, UGK’s “Int’l Players’ Anthem” stands as one of the all-time best. The absurdity of it the clip -- including André 3000 in a kilt, a wedding party that counts Lukas Haas, and some of the best wedding outfits of all time (including Pimp C in head-to-toe white fur) -- is nothing compared to how seamlessly the video captures the ebullience of the accompanying song. -- S.J.H.

56. Beyoncé, "7/11" (dir. Beyoncé, 2014)

As we all know in 2018, The Carters love a production -- but travel back with us to a Friday night in November 2014, when Beyoncé proved that she could go low-budget and still make a high-quality music video. The grainy, iPhone-looking footage of “7/11” features Beyoncé and her dancers goofing off in their underwear in various hotel-room settings. They twerk. They drink from red plastic cups. They turn hair dryers into props. Beyoncé uses someone’s butt as a surface for throwing dice. Quick-cut edits and scene jumps give the video a playful, frenetic energy, while choreography and costume changes make it pro without being overly polished. It’s safe to assume that the peak into this informal world is highly curated, but “7/11” has the intimacy of a selfie: Even though it doesn’t look like anything you've actually ever shot on your phone. -- C.W.

55. Justin Bieber, "Sorry" (dir. Parris Goebel, 2015)

The Bieb brought choreography -- and women -- to the forefront of his "Sorry" visual, with the singer enlisting New Zealand’s all-female troupe ReQuest Dance Crew to bring his upbeat Purpose chart-topper to life. The colorful visual immediately racked up millions of views, with the wildly funky outfits inspiring Halloween costumes (just one week after the vid’s Oct. 22, 2015 release) and the ReQuest girls' impressive moves sparking plenty of twerk-filled tributes across the Internet. Nearly three billion views later, “Sorry” proved that the heartthrob doesn’t even need to make an appearance to make one of his videos special. -- TAYLOR WEATHERBY

54. Iggy Azalea feat. Charli XCX, "Fancy" (dir. Director X, 2014)

For Iggy Azalea’s biggest pop moment, the ‘90s throwback love of the 2010s was in full swing, with the Australian rapper and her hook-slinging co-star traveling back to the set of classic teen comedy Clueless. Iconic scenes -- the classroom debate, the house party, the near-car crash on the freeway --  are reproduced with no-expense-spared flair, the cinematic set design and hordes of in-costume extras vaulting this 2014 good-life anthem straight into 1995 and all its plaid-clad pizzaz. Millennial Mean Girls babies nodding to their era’s spiritual forerunner — it’s game recognizing game in a music video that should similarly endure. -- C.P.

53. Bruno Mars & Cardi B, "Finesse" (Remix) (dir. Bruno Mars & Florent Dechard, 2018)

Everyone loves a good dose of nostalgia, and Bruno Mars served up a giant splatter-painted platter of it with his “Finesse” video. Recruiting Cardi B for a remix of the high-energy 24K Magic track, Mars emphasized the song's punchy ‘90s-style hip-hop beat with an homage to the era’s sketch-comedy classic In Living Color, using smooth moves and neon outfits to create an awesome spitting-image tribute. And the shout-outs were reciprocated: “Finesse” immediately drew praise from show stars Damon, Marlon, and Kim Wayans, and even sparked a reaction out of Jennifer Lopez, who got her start dancing as a Fly Girl on the show. Just as ILC was a cultural moment of the ‘90s, “Finesse” helped Bruno Mars and Cardi B solidify their place as icons of 2018. -- T.W.

A pivotal video in Taylor Swift's pop mythology, "You Belong With Me" saw the burgeoning superstar still playing the underdog, whose cartoonish glasses, school-pride wardrobes, and goofy dance moves made her the idol (and/or go-to Halloween costume) for a generation of unsatisfied overachievers. But don't forget she plays the bad girl in the video, too, and with equal aplomb; listen closely as she marks her territory with the boy next door in her red convertible, and you can hear the snakes from the Reputation Tour hissing impatiently in the distance. -- A.U.

All of Lana Del Rey’s music videos are cinematic -- it’s kind of her thing -- but “National Anthem” has a movie-quality plot to boot. Del Rey stars first as Marilyn Monroe in a reimagined staging of the icon’s 1962 performance of "Happy Birthday, Mr. President," then as Jackie Kennedy alongside A$AP Rocky’s suave, handsy JFK. Through Del Rey’s eyes, we see familial scenes unfold between one of the most fascinating couples in American history, culminating in a re-enactment of the Kennedy assassination. When Del Rey’s castle crumbles, you feel it in your chest, too, and her monologue at the end never fails to bring chills. -- G.G.

50. The Diplomats, "Dipset Anthem" (dir. N/A, 2003)

Twenty-plus Harlemites in their baggy, early-2000s best rocking at canted angles away from the camera, arranged on courtyard steps -- this is a movement. This is what power looks like. This is what’s really good. That image primes you for Juelz Santana’s opening line: Today is a new day. And if you haven’t got the message, the beat shifts midway through the video into the magisterial “I Really Mean It” to drop an immaculate Cam’ron into your living room, stepping out of an Escalade in custom pink Dipset Timbs. Truly, did we dream this? -- R.S.

One of the most memorable and instantly accessible tracks in Snoop's extensive oeuvre got a similarly delectable video to match, shot in black and white on a blinding background with Pharrell supportively in tow as his head-nodding sidekick. The video's sleek and casually surreal aesthetic was as ubiquitous at the time as the song itself, and now 15 years later it remains a blast to re-watch, particularly for its cameos by the similarly-ageless Pusha T, Chad Hugo, and Lauren London, not to mention Snoop's young sons at the time. -- D.R.

Orange Caramel have never been bound by K-pop conventions, and “My Copycat” represents the pinnacle of the trio’s out-of-the-box thinking with its interactive game. The full visual experience requires repeat viewings to scope out all of the Easter eggs hidden in each frame, as the sweeping Where’s Waldo shots turn a simple concept into a grandiose design. So this is what Orange Caramel meant when they sang, “Play games with my heart tonight.” -- C.K.

47. Drake feat. Lil Wayne, "HYFR (Hell Ya Fucking Right)" (dir. Director X, 2012)

More than any of us Jewish kids would have ever dared daydream about during Hebrew School: the biggest rapper in the world documenting his own adult Bar Mitzvah, replete with the requisite torah reading, hora dancing, and ever so many popped bottles of Manischewitz. Did three-and-a-half minutes of Drake and Lil Wayne going HAM -- err, going smoked salmon -- on the former's special day do more to get kids to their local congregations on Saturday morning than every rabbinical sermon this century combined? Impossible to say for sure, but chances are the JTS wouldn't wanna see the box score of that showdown. -- A.U.

46. Christina Aguilera, Lil' Kim, Mya & Pink, "Lady Marmalade" (dir. Paul Hunter, 2001)

This clip from the Moulin Rouge soundtrack was more than a music video; it was a pop culture event. And while several groups of lady titans have recently tried to recreate the magic (see: "Girls" and "Bang Bang," to name a few), none have come close to conjuring up the spectacle that was "Lady Marmalade." With Mya's hyper-feminine feathers, Pink's rocker-chic top hat (a possible nod to Slash?), Kim's blinged-out statement necklace, and Xtina's ginormous, crimped mane, the video let each soul sister showcase their own personality without stealing the attention from the ensemble. -- P.C.

45. Tierra Whack, "Whack World" (dir. Thibaut Duverneix and Mathieu Leger, 2018)

Philly rapper Tierra Whack’s 15-track, 15-minute debut is the perfect example of what a full-length visual can, and more importantly should, do for an audio body of work. She delivered a multi-part video so striking it demands attention be paid to the music, and vice versa. Each colorful and often jarring clip -- one (literal) minute she’s getting a manicure with a brutally busted face, and the next she's kicking back in a pet cemetery --  shows the ingenuity of an artist unfamiliar with boundaries. Let’s hope she never finds them. -- LYNDSEY HAVENS

This 2015 remake of Vives’ original video and recording from 1995 is an achingly beautiful love letter to Vives’ native Colombia, where he enlisted help from multiple fellow Colombian stars -- including Fanny Lu, Fonesca and Maluma, each hailing from a different region in the country -- for a stunning, sweeping trip through his homeland. Meanwhile, the evocative lyrics and melancholy, yet danceable melody, bring to mind memories of Gabriel García Marquez. -- L.C.

43. Johnny Cash, "Hurt" (dir. Mark Romanek, 2003)

Whether you knew that country Jesus was knocking on heaven’s door in 2002 or not, this 2003 Mark Romanek masterpiece hits like a slow-motion mule kick to the gut. With his Mt. Rushmore face ravaged by time and hard living, Cash plucks a black guitar in a baroque living room overstuffed with the junk of life, as a montage of snapshots from his younger, hell raisin' years flash across the screen. The devastating, funereal cover of Nine Inch Nails' '90s hit about decay oozes over the unshakable image of a frail Cash pouring out wine at a Last Supper and quick-cuts of Jesus being nailed to the cross. If this final reckoning doesn’t give you shivers, maybe you’re already dead inside. -- GIL KAUFMAN

Intended as his pre-retirement swan song, JAY-Z’s 2003 opus The Black Album gave fans several striking visuals, from “Change Clothes” to “Dirt Off My Shoulders.” But Hovito’s most visceral clip came when he and director Mark Romanek conjured up the black and white video for “99 Problems.” With "Problems" producer Rick Rubin riding shotgun, Jay masterfully illustrates his volatile relationships with the New York streets, the boys in blue and, ultimately, his own demise, as he is violently gunned down at the end of the video. Though Hov never really “faded to black” and continued to release more albums, the video for “99 Problems” had every rap fan petrified at the sheer thought of losing the culture’s most revered hero. Luckily for us, Superman is still taking out rap villains for a living. -- CARL LAMARRE

“Dude, you wanna crash the mall?” 

--Avril Lavigne, in the first ten seconds of her first music video for her first single

Can you and your skateboarding friends/bandmates who look like a generic-brand Sum 41 (Sum 31?) really “crash” a mall if it’s daytime and already open? The premise is shaky, but whatever: From her first moment on MTV screens, Avril Lavigne established her extraordinary brand of PG-13 coming-of-age tomfoolery with a music video that’s almost too 2002 to function. The ties! The food court! The Jackass-style stunts! Life gets complicated when your friend starts getting all two-faced and trying on NFL jerseys and jewelry store bling, but finally, suburban early-'00s teens had their keeping-it-real heroine. -- C.P.

40. Lady Gaga, "Paparazzi" (dir. Jonas Àkerlund, 2009)

With the music video running double the length of the song, Gaga's Jonas Åkerlund-directed "Paparazzi" covers a lot of ground: Attempted murder by Alexander Skarsgård, the successful murder of Alexander Skarsgård, old movie homages, Mickey Mouse-esque flip-up glasses, and some of the fiercest looks from Stefani's early avant-dance diva days. The image of crutch-bound Gaga staggering across a purple carpet like Evil Robot Maria from Metropolis -- while her dapper backup dancers vogue behind her -- made it clear that unlike most pop stars on the planet, Gaga was here to get weird. And in 2009, we devoured it like the fame-obsessed monsters she was sending up. -- J. Lynch

39. Kanye West feat. Pusha T, "Runaway" (dir. Kanye West, 2010)

More short film than music video, the genius of "Runaway" comes from its stark simplicity, and the meaning seemingly imbued within it. After the solo repetitive piano note that opens the song summons a troupe of black-clad ballet dancers, West begins to deliver each line with an increasing look of urgency and desperation on his face, ultimately climbing on top of the white piano before giving way to Pusha T's verse and the dancers' graceful stoicism. After building the song to its highest intensity with almost Christlike posture, West then cedes the floor to a ballet showcase as the song's coda wrenches to its conclusion, ultimately ending with the rapper placing hand over heart, somber in one of the most quintessential images of his career. -- D.R.

Ah, “Hollaback Girl:” a video that contains multitudes. This is prime Love.Angel.Music.Baby content, which means the Harajuku Girls -- Stefani’s “super kawaii” but disturbingly silent Japanese girl squad -- are front and center, riding through Van Nuys and Reseda in an Impala behind fearless leader Gwen, twerking, and (quietly) helping her spell “bananas.” The minimalist-meets-marching band sound, courtesy of the Neptunes, is in nearly every frame -- along with Pharrell himself, blessing Stefani with a brief cameo and his ineffable brand of cool. But this video, in the end, is really all about Stefani and the charming ball of contradictions she has increasingly revealed herself to be: a magnetic-enough presence to make us consider her motives, and then abandon any semblance of logical thought to scream “This shit is bananas!” at the top of our lungs. -- R.M.

37. Nicki Minaj, "Anaconda" (dir. Colin Tilley, 2014)

The Sir Mix-a-Lot sample "Anaconda" is built around may have been met with a collective eye roll for its obviousness, but Minaj fully redeemed herself by pairing it with her most memorable visual to date. Between a bikini-clad aerobics session and an unforgettable lap dance (one that Minaj bragged left guest-star recipient Drake, ahem, "excited like hell"), the colorful clip solidified Minaj's superstar status, helping "Anaconda" slither to No. 2 on the Billboard Hot 100, still the rapper's highest peak yet. -- P.C.

36. Rihanna feat. JAY-Z, "Umbrella" (dir. Chris Applebaum, 2007)

A waterfall of sparks, umbrella-based choreography and -- best of all -- an iconic silvered silhouette of one of the biggest pop stars both then and now makes the recipe for this timeless video. It’s the perfect blend of sexy, playful, and artistic -- risqué without being raunchy, thematic without being tacky. But the video’s biggest feat of all is proving that, even if only for Rihanna, it is possible to look that good with an umbrella. -- L.H.

Starring a blonde Lauren Holly as the badass Mary Ann, pre-30 Rock Jane Krakowski as the helpless Wanda, and NYPD Blue star Dennis Franz (outfitted in a purposefully terrible wig) as the title villain, "Goodbye Earl" is a delightfully campy and colorful video from the Dixie Chicks about "the best of friends" who poison the titular character after he beats up Wanda. It's a tale that highlights the power of the female bond, without making light of its serious subject matter. Yes, "Earl had to die," but the clip shows us just how sweet revenge can be -- and by video's end, even a zombified Earl has joined in on the hoedown. -- D.W.

Like the song itself, the 2002 music video for “Without Me” is a fragmentation grenade of rapid-fire images designed to level Eminem’s critics -- most of which he plays in the video himself. The rapper uses battery cables to fry a quasi-mechanical Dick Cheney lookalike and flips off his mother Debbie (Em in a blond metal wig, natch) as she appears on a When Sons Go Bad talk show. And Shady Records lieutenant Obie Trice, in a cameo, body slams Em-as-Moby, who called Shady’s music homophobic and misogynistic. But the real thrill of this clip is watching Shady and partner-in-crime Dr. Dre dressed, respectively, as comic-book characters Robin and Blade, head-bouncing with abandon as they rush to save a minor from purchasing a copy of The Eminem Show, which carries a Parental Advisory sticker. -- F.D.

Think of another outfit that’s had such decades-long legs. Everyone who's seen this spacey Nigel Dick-directed mini-space epic -- the follow-up to the equally one-of-a-kind “… Baby One More Time” -- can instantly picture Brit’s second-skin red pleather catsuit (which was her idea, as was the concept of dancing on Mars). The whole experience is a crash course in Britney 101: seductive, if a bit wooden, group dancing; hard-core eye contact with the camera; requisite bare mid-riff squirming; and a silly comedic bit, all of which remain key parts of the star's rust-free brand blueprint to this day. -- G.K.

32. Tyler, the Creator, "Yonkers" (dir. Wolf Haley, 2011)

Tyler, the Creator had a vision: “‘I’m sitting on a chair rapping, I’m playing with a bug, I eat it, I throw it up, my eyes go black, and I hang myself.’ That was his treatment,” explained director Anthony Mandler (Beyoncé’s “Get Me Bodied,” Rihanna’s “Man Down”) in a 2011 interview. Mandler, along with director of photography Luis “Panch” Perez, gave Tyler the guidance and equipment he needed to self-direct the black-and-white, tilt-shifted video for “Yonkers." In the breakout clip, Tyler does exactly what he outlined: He sits in a chair, lets a giant cockroach crawl over his hands, appears to take a bite, pukes, blacks out his eyes, and hangs himself. Effective enough to make stomachs the world over turn -- and earn Tyler one of the all-time least-likely nods for a Video of the Year VMA. -- C.W.

Fittingly, one of the century’s most beloved No. 1 hits arrived with a timeless visual. Carly Rae flips the male gaze of voyeuristic videos past and becomes the behind-the-blinds observer snooping on a backyard hottie, her giddy enthusiasm matching the lyrical tone perfectly. She’s fanning herself from the heat of the shirtless car-washing hunk a little too vigorously, fantasizing herself into the cover of the kitschy romance novel that’s sitting on her coffee table. She eventually musters the courage to make it out of the living room and into the steamy driveway scene, where the iconic “here’s my number” exchange leads to one similarly expectation-subverting final plot twist. -- C.P.

30. Fountains of Wayne, "Stacy's Mom" (dir. Chris Applebaum, 2003)

"We looked at a lot of treatments and some directors were trying to be kind of arty and subtle with it, but Chris Applebaum went completely for the jugular,” Fountains of Wayne guitarist Adam Schlesinger said of the Applebaum-directed “Stacy’s Mom” clip in a 2004 interview. In retrospect, there was no better approach for the surprise pop smash: the broad, brightly colored comedy here -- driven by model Rachel Hunter in the titular role -- accentuates the song’s storytelling while mixing in some fantasy elements and highly appropriate Ric Ocasek references. Special kudos to Shane Habouca as the teen protagonist, so nimbly capturing the weird, confusing wonder that is male puberty. -- J. Lipshutz

29. Luis Fonsi & Daddy Yankee, "Despacito" (dir. Carlos Peréz, 2017)

The most-watched video in YouTube history, directed by Carlos Perez, is an unabashed celebration of all things Latin, from the opening guitars and the vistas of Puerto Rico to the brightly painted homes of La Perla with their religious icons and chickens on the porch. And finally, there’s the dancing. Clichéd? Maybe, but totally real, and so expertly realized, we couldn’t help but watch. Ultimately, 5.3 billion viewers can’t be wrong. -- L.C.

You can ask Kendrick Lamar, and he'll tell you that one of his early inspirations was Missy Elliott. In the late '90s and early 2000s, Elliott bloomed into a music video savant because of her audacious attempts to do the impossible in under five minutes. In '01, Elliott wiped the competition with her Dave Meyers-shot visual for "Get Ur Freak On." The funky track included a starry cast, with appearances by Ludacris, Busta Rhymes, and Eve. Meanwhile, Missy rhymes inside of an underground sewer, glides on top of a chandelier -- and just when you thought the fun was over -- she even sneaks in a quick verse from her Miss E LP highlight "Lick Shots" to restart the party all over again. -- C.L.

27. Charli XCX, "Boys" (dir. Charli XCX & Sarah McColgan, 2017)

If you came for “Boys,” it’s boys you’ll find in this genius self-directed visual by Charli XCX -- approximately 60 of them, in fact, from Diplo bench-pressing puppies and Joe Jonas seductively feasting on pancakes to Charlie Puth hosting a car wash. Did we mention the whole thing is bathed in millennial pink? The idea, Charli told BBC Radio 1, was to reverse traditional music video gender roles, making dudes do “all the sexy things that girls usually do in videos.” Whip-smart, thought-provoking, and fun as hell -- not to mention providing fans with enough GIFs to last a Twitter lifetime -- “Boys” set the Internet into mayhem, and left it with a message. -- T.C.

26. Christina Aguilera feat. Redman, "Dirrty" (dir. David LaChapelle, 2002)

In the world of pop divadom, frequent reinvention isn’t just a choice, it’s practically a rule. But back in 2002, Christina Aguilera, loathful of her prefab pop princess persona, committed to one of the most explosive image resets in history with a red thong, a pair of chaps, and a dance move that would come to be known as “the slut drop.” You can only imagine the kind of language her critics used against her, and, indeed, there was plenty of outrage, vitriol, and mean-spirited mocking flung her way. Still, Aguilera seemed to weather the attention like a pro, and outlets that gave the young singer a chance to explain herself were treated to a brief lesson in sexual agency that was years beyond the general public’s understanding back then: “I may have been the naked-ass girl in the video,” she told Blender in 2003, "but if you at it carefully, I’m also at the forefront. I’m not just some lame chick in a rap video; I’m in the power position.” Guess Bionic wasn’t her only work ahead of its time. -- N.F.

What better way to play up the youthful sensation of a first love than with LEGOs, a classic toy for a classic rock song. The toy of choice works in a surprising way here, as the figurines capture the similarly unclear mindset of a boy so confused by love he believes “the two sides of my brain need to have a meeting.” But, most impressive of all is how the video turns something seemingly so simple into something much more complex -- reportedly, the video was shot frame by frame, requiring the LEGOs to be rebuilt each time -- a situation that anyone who has ever fallen in love is likely all too familiar with. -- L.H.

There’s a long and tired history of Justin Timberlake using Britney Spears as a punch line, and, sure, the concept of of a disgruntled ex breaking into his former girlfriend’s house and lurking menacingly while she showers hasn’t aged well. But the kind of pettiness on display in the captivating “Cry Me a River” is an extinct breed: a revenge fantasy that doesn’t bother with plausible deniability or subtle shady references, and instead lets its darkest impulses curdle in the open for all to see. It wasn’t pretty, but it swung big -- and everyone grabbed the popcorn and gave in to the twisted voyeurism of it all. -- N.F.

A bold, candy-colored cornucopia of delectable delights from start to finish, the 2010 Mathew Cullen-directed clip features Perry -- sometimes covered only in strategically placed cotton candy, other times in a whipped-cream exploding bra, and always in a day-glo wig -- as a pawn in Snoop Dogg’s Queens of Candyfornia board game, though of course she escapes Snoop's clutches to lead a dance party on the beach. The only way the video would be better were if it were actually edible, especially Snoop Dogg’s army of bird-flipping gummy bears. -- M.N.

M.I.A. and director Romain Gavras had already proven that they could make an unforgettable video with 2010’s highly controversial “Born Free" -- and two years later, they did it again with “Bad Girls.” Shot in Morocco, the video depicts Saudi drifting, where cars ride on their sides on only two wheels. Scenes of stunt men and women sitting on the outside of the tilted rides are juxtaposed with shots of M.I.A. and a glam posse of women covered in animal prints and metallic fabrics. Not one to be a bystander, M.I.A. even gets in on the drifting action, as she’s filmed lounging on the passenger door of a white BMW, filing her nails as the car cruises along sideways. How could the duo top that? “The next video needs to be shot on the moon,” Gavras mused in a behind-the-scenes video. “With hookers.”   

This is a boy band video with a complex dramatic setup: We open in a dimly lit vaudeville theater, where the boys of *NSYNC hang from strings, manipulated from above by a diabolical but very pretty lady, who then cuts each of said strings to set one beautifully-coiffed *NSYNC member at a time on his very own mini-action adventure, racing cars through the desert or running across the top of a locomotive, Bond-style. But let’s be honest: That’s not what we’re here for. We’re here to see baby-faced J.T. mean mug for the camera! We’re here to see J.C. torturously belt his “Byyyyye baaaaby!” ad-lib. And above all, we are here to see the dance moves --- the steps that would go on to be repeated at countless school dances and house parties, and that will certainly go down in music video history as some of the most classic choreography ever captured. Even if they were doing it in some sort of intergalactic vacuum, as *NSYNC appear to be in the “Bye Bye Bye” video, it was impossible to look away -- and easy to imagine, as we followed those moves in our living rooms, that we could transcend the screen and live in their magical world, too. -- R.M.

20. OK Go, "Here It Goes Again" (dir. Trish Sie, 2006)

In 2006, long before Kim Kardashian broke the Internet, this Chicago band went viral with what is otherwise known as “the treadmill video,” a self-choreographed DIY affair -- with the help of lead singer Damian Kulash’s sister Trish Sie, who was working as a ballroom dancer at the time. The clip features the band executing a series of (mostly) precision dance moves on six moving treadmills, and if you’ve ever fallen off one of those things, the video is as thrilling as it is entertaining, helping it rack up a reported 900,000 views in a single day. It wasn’t the first ambitious video the group had recorded -- see 2002's “C-C-C-Cinnamon Lips” -- nor would it be the last, as the band would only scale up with subsequent visuals, most recently culminating in 2016's “Upside Down & Inside Out,” shot in a plane that simulated zero gravity. How they’ll top that one remains to be seen, but we'll probably find out soon enough. -- F.D.

19. Miley Cyrus, "Wrecking Ball" (dir. Terry Richardson, 2013)

“Wrecking Ball” was not the lead single for the all-grown-up coming-out party that was Miley Cyrus' Bangerz, but nothing from that era, not even her controversial MTV Video Music Awards performance, forced viewers to recognize Cyrus on her own terms more than this Terry Richardson-directed clip. In it, Cyrus doesn’t push buttons -- she, well, uses a sturdy tool often found at constructions sites to smash them, doing whatever she can to inspire feeling, any feeling, in those watching. There’s the raw play for emotion with the tearful close-ups, which Cyrus has said were meant to evoke Sinead O’Connor’s “Nothing Compares 2 U." And then there’s the more polarizing attention-grabs -- Cyrus licking a sledgehammer, appearing naked atop the title object as it swings around. Cyrus did whatever she could to get a reaction, and she didn’t care what kind she got as long as people were looking. “I think people are going to hate it,” she told Rolling Stone at the time, “and then when we get to the bridge, they’re gonna have a little tear and be like, ‘Fuck you!’ … It’s something that people are not gonna forget.” -- N.F.

18. Sia, "Chandelier" (dir. Sia & Daniel Askill)

Ever the elusive star, Sia opted to sit out the videos for 2014’s 1000 Forms of Fear. It yielded some of the most exhilarating visuals of the time, with a notable assist from then-pre-teen dancer Maddie Ziegler, then known for starring on Lifetime’s Dance Moms. Clad in a white, tight-cropped wig that resembles Sia’s signature coif, Ziegler stepped in for three of the videos from the set, most notably “Chandelier,” a clip with over 1.5 billion YouTube views, which tracks her as she dances through a dilapidated apartment, breathing life into the drab and mundane surroundings around her -- and making a star out of its absent singer. -- S.J.H.

17. My Chemical Romance, "Helena" (dir. Marc Webb, 2005)

It wasn't supposed to rain on set, but of course it did: My Chemical Romance and Marc Webb brought the emo downpour for "Helena," and the elements simply responded in turn. One ofthree brilliant video collaborations between band and director for MCR's starmaking Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge album, "Helena" was both the simplest and the most affecting: Its balletic funeral proceeding made for the best high-concept rock melodarama since Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris were doing feature-film dry runs with Smashing Pumpkins a decade earlier. But for all the elaborate choreography and staging, the most indelible moment remains the curl of lead singer Gerard Way's lower lip as he sings the final tearjerking chorus -- a reminder that the song was inspired by Gerard and bassist brother Mikey's late grandmother, and thus the video held far more weight than just the prop coffin they were carrying. -- A.U.

16. Drake, "Hotline Bling" (dir. Director X, 2014)

The dorky dad moves, the Sean Paul references, the pastel lighting reminiscent of artist James Turrell, the slightly passive-aggressive lyrics, the D.R.A.M. "Cha Cha” controversy, the parodies, the endless memes! There was no way that anyone could escape the pop culture phenomenon that was Drake’s “Hotline Bling” video. Helmed by Director X, the video catches you off guard by beginning with a bunch of Drizzy-approved women working at -- what else -- a call center. As the camera zooms into the water cooler just 20 seconds in, the dancing that sparked a thousand GIFs begins. No matter how hard you try to look away, Drake keeps you lured in with every corny salsa step, cell phone-imitating hand wiggle, and agonized facial expression. Being the cultural mastermind that he is, Drake had to have predicted the video’s outcome. And somehow that makes it all the more brilliant. -- B.G.

15. Kendrick Lamar, "HUMBLE." (dir. Dave Meyers & The Little Homies, 2017)

Kendrick Lamar’s Grammy-winning video for “Humble” is a lesson in irony: While the song is a finger-wagging anthem about modesty, the video itself is overflowing with wealth -- both physical and metaphorical. Opening with Pope Lamar in a vacant church, the video rapidly shifts through scenes of the rapper playfully toying with a money machine, enjoying Grey Poupon, and teeing off atop a car’s roof. But the more memorable parts highlight black-centric symbolism. With Lamar recreating Leonardo da Vinci's The Last Supper with all black men and and a woman fearlessly displaying her stretch marks, the video becomes yet another celebration of the culture in the rapper’s visual armory. -- B.G.

14. Lady Gaga feat. Beyoncé, "Telephone" (dir. Jonas Åkerlund, 2010)

What happens when you pair up two of the most influential female pop stars in recent history for a music video? That would be “Telephone,” the gloriously ridiculous, nine-and-a-half-minute spectacle from director Jonas Åkerlund that involves a women’s prison, Beyoncé (ahem, “Honeybee”) feeding Lady Gaga a pastry, a murder at a diner, a poison sandwich-making tutorial, Quentin Tarantino references aplenty, and a dance sequence that has spawned dozens of YouTube tutorials. If all that’s not enough to make “Telephone” an instant classic, consider that the video is actually a continuation of Gaga’s “Paparazzi” video from the year prior, with the same director -- which ends with Gaga in the can -- and let your mind be blown. Could a third installment be in our future? We can only hope. -- T.C.

13. Taylor Swift, "Blank Space" (dir. Joseph Kahn, 2015)

After years of receiving criticism for writing songs about her exes, Taylor Swift stuck it to the haters with a visual portrayal of just how “insane” she seems to former suitors and critics alike. The result is the singer’s best video to date, as “Blank Space" makes a mockery of the crazy-ex persona while entrancing viewers with imagery that’s both fanciful and harrowing. The video sets up a classic romance with a handsome guy, a breathtaking mansion, stunning gowns, and white horses (plus a cameo from her celebrity cat Olivia Benson), turning the seemingly perfect relationship on its head once infidelity and jealousy strike. Swift’s acting is brilliant as she takes a knife to painted portraits of her beau, chops up his clothes, and sings with mascara streaming down her face — almost making it believable that she’s as crazy as naysayers make her out to be. Whether you think she loves the drama or it loves her, Taylor Swift always makes sure her videos tell a story, and “Blank Space” could be its own damn novel. -- T.W.

12. PSY, "Gangnam Style" (dir. Cho Soo-Hyun, 2012)

It's hard to believe that it's been over half a decade since the satirical dance track "Gangnam Style" took the world by storm to become the first-ever video to be viewed over 1 billion times. With its over-the-top antics aimed at mocking the denizens of Seoul's Gangnam neighborhood, numerous cameos from local comedians and pop stars, and its easy-to-learn equine choreography, PSY’s video became a surprise global sensation that turned all eyes to South Korea’s music industry. Though it’s no longer the world’s most-viewed music video, the legacy of “Gangnam Style” remains. -- T.H.

11. JAY-Z & Kanye West, "Otis" (dir. Spike Jonze, 2011)

What part of 2011's impossibly joyful video for "Otis" feels the least likely in 2018? That it had a world premiere on MTV (like, MTV the cable TV channel) with a rebroadcast on MTV2 a couple hours later? That the most controversial thing about it -- the thing that necessitated a disclaimer at the end -- was that the needless deconstruction of the vehicle used for the clip's joyriding would be seen as financially irresponsible? That the big celebrity cameo comes from a silent Aziz Ansari? That Kanye appears to be having an absolute blast? That Jay and Kanye act like they genuinely love each other? Or is it that there's a gigantic American flag plastered on the wall behind the duo, with no message seemingly attached to it except to ask, "How could you not love a country where we get to do shit like this?" At the time, the point felt like a strong one. -- A.U.

10. Childish Gambino, "This Is America" (dir. Hiro Murai, 2018)

We get the music videos we want, but also sometimes the ones we need. Amid racial strife stirred up by a president who blames “both sides” and endless uniformed violence against minority men and women came actor/rapper Donald Glover’s funky, neck-snapping surprise statement. As Gambino, Glover -- dressed in Confederate Army grey pants and no shirt in a possible nod to Afrofunk godhead/provocateur Fela Kuti -- busts hip-cracking African Gwara Gwara dance moves while shooting a hooded black man and striking a pose straight outta Jim Crow imagery. Yes, it’s a lot. Released as Glover rebooted intergalactic schemer Lando Calrissian in Disney’s Solo, the sight of the Atlanta star grabbing his suddenly global platform and gunning down a church choir with a machine gun (à la the Charleston church massacre) then sprinting away from the Sunken Place tells you everything about the current state of the nation. -- G.K.

9. Fatboy Slim, "Weapon of Choice" (dir. Spike Jonze, 2000)

"Weapon of Choice" predicted the viral video as well as any other clip released in the pre-YouTube era, down to the fact that a lot of the people who remember the video probably couldn't name who its song was by: Undoubtedly, at least half of the clip's Internet traffic comes from "Christopher Walken hotel dancing" searches. "Choice" was a good song but a sensational video, one that brings the aforementioned four-word concept to such improbable three-dimensional life that it remains compulsively watchable even after the 57th time you're seeing the guy who played Max Shreck doing the hands-in-pockets shimmy. The key? Those beginning and closing shots of a silent, still Walken seated in deep contemplation, with only the whirring sounds of hotel maintenance showing signs of life around him, as existentially haunting as anything Beckett ever staged. -- A.U.

8. Beyoncé, "Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)" (dir. Jake Nava, 2008)

Kanye West nearly committed career suicide when he crashed the MTV VMAs stage in 2010 to interrupt Taylor Swift’s acceptance speech for Best Female Video: “I’ma let you finish,” he infamously commented, “but Beyonce had one of the best videos of all time!” He wasn't wrong, though -- directed by Jake Nava, the stunning, breathless visuals for “Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)” marked a turning point in Beyoncé’s career: She had proven herself so talented, so enrapturing, that all you really needed to pull off a milestone video was to simply train the camera on her in an empty room and let her handle the rest. The resulting clip is an unstoppable assailing of the senses: Bey, clad in an over-the-shoulder leotard, is joined by two backup dancers, all in heels, hitting a for-experts dance routine and making it look simple. As the background gradient shifts colors and the cameras circle her, she never breaks focus for even a split second, keeping the energy on full throttle. It’s no wonder West put his name and rep on the line for the sake of the video -- Beyoncé earned it. -- S.J.H.

7. Britney Spears, "Toxic" (dir. Joseph Kahn, 2004)

Britney Spears gifted the 21st century with a number of indelible looks, and the "Toxic" video boasts an embarrassment of them: Britney the Mile High Club-bound stewardess whose kiss turns a schlubby passenger into a stunning model; Britney the laser-tripping secret agent with fire engine-red hair; and of course, Britney in the buff, covered in diamonds and writhing around the floor like the Bond Girl to end all Bond Girls. Whether prancing down the aisle of an airplane or poisoning her boyfriend (five years before "Paparazzi") and jumping off a balcony into the night, "Toxic" Britney wiped clean the schoolgirl imagery and set the tone for the next 15 years of her career: Breathtaking, flawlessly executed camp that was closer to drag culture than fashion week. -- J. Lynch

6. Rihanna & Calvin Harris, "We Found Love" (dir. Melina Matsoukas, 2011)

Anyone who wondered if pop stars had lost their ability to excite, to surprise, to unnerve with their music videos had to feel the "We Found Love" clip like a bolt of lightning to the chest. Melina Matsoukas' dizzying visual for Rihanna's career-recalibrating smash Calvin Harris collab was a tale of a toxic relationship starring RiRi and a pouty, peroxide-blond gentleman who looks a lot like oh-take-a-guess, edited like a light-speed four-minute relationship montage that recreates the shock all music videos must've delivered to fans of classic Hollywood back in '81. Like Trainspotting, what makes "We Found Love" really frightening is how palpably electric the highs are, enough to make it plausible that its star would do what it took to feed her addiction initially. But that doesn't mean you don't still breathe a sigh of relief when she decides to choose life at the end instead. -- A.U.

5. OutKast, "Hey Ya!" (dir. Bryan Barber, 2003)

Coming up on the 15th anniversary of its release, “Hey Ya!” remains an infectious slice of pop culture -- as does its video. A twist on the Beatles’ own era-defining appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show in 1964, “Hey Ya!” finds OutKast turning the British Invasion on its ear, complete with black & white footage, a screaming female audience, a black family viewing the momentous TV performance at home, and Ryan Phillippe in the guise of host Sullivan. Speaking of guises, Big Boi acts as the band manager, while André 3000 portrays all eight band members, including background group The Love Haters -- all garbed in eye-catching green finery. During the two-day shoot in Los Angeles, André reportedly performed “Hey Ya!” 23 times. Beyond introducing the phrase “shake it like a Polaroid picture” into the pop lexicon, OutKast also single-handedly revitalized the camera company’s public image. The Bryan Barber-directed video later won a bevy of awards, including video of the year at the 2004 MTV Video Music Awards. -- G.M.

4. Beyoncé, "Formation" (dir. Melina Matsoukas, 2016)

Beyoncé stopped the world for the umpteenth time when she dropped the explosive song and video for “Formation," just a day before performing the anthem at Super Bowl 50. Frequent collaborator Melina Matsoukas may have shot the video in Los Angeles, but every second is deeply rooted in Louisiana and its Creole background -- the ancestral origin of Beyoncé’s mother, Tina Knowles Lawson. The historical references are overwhelming: the Antebellum-style houses, Beyoncé’s Victorian hoop skirts and petticoats, the now-legendary wide-brimmed hat suitable for American Horror Story: Coven, Blue Ivy happily rocking her fluffy afro, the singer being submerged underwater while on top of a police car as a nod to Hurricane Katrina , the inclusion of New Orleans stars Big Freedia and the late Messy Mya. At one point in the video, a young boy is seen dancing in front of a line of gun-clad officers, who respond by putting their hands up. In a time where racial tensions were climbing to new, uncomfortable heights, “Formation” served as an active reminder that black people could not be silenced. To top it all off, the “Formation” video dropped just a few months before the singer’s second Super Bowl halftime performance, which further shoved its socio-political message in the face of America. -- B.G.

3. D'Angelo, "Untitled (How Does It Feel?)" (dir. Paul Hunter, 2000)

Naked as the day he was born, save for a gold chain and bracelet, D’Angelo is the entirety of the simple, single-take video for “Untitled.” The song asks how does it feel. and the video attempts to answer what it looks like, and it does so with such candor that the song and video have become inseparable. You see parts of this man’s body move, tense, and ripple in ways that must’ve been previously only available to his romantic partners. From the vantage of 2018, the self-scrutinizing gloom that it cast on his career, the way it fueled his performance anxiety as fans showed up to the post-video tour dates expecting total access to Adonis each night, feels safely in the rearview. D’Angelo returned in 2014 with Black Messiah and toured successfully after its release, allowing us to once again to just admire the physicality and emotion of one of the greatest sex jams ever made. -- R.S.

2. Missy Elliott, "Work It" (dir. Dave Meyers, 2002)

While most of her contemporaries settled for music videos that made them look tough or sexy, Missy Elliott got strange with hers, and "Work It" is a perfect distillation of her idiosyncratic vision of warped world. From upside-down dance moves on a post-apocalyptic playground to Missy swallowing a Lamborghini whole and donning a dunce cap for the deliciously goofy "why you act dumb?" segment, Elliott pushed imagery into the mainstream that most rappers, rockers, and pop stars wouldn't dare go near in an era before being "weird" or "nerdy" had cultural cache. Sure, someone else might have a Prince parody or a split-second Halle Berry cameo in their clip, but would they also have a U.S. Marine mouthing "give you some-some-some of this Cinnabun" or the lead artist lip-syncing to camera while bees swarm their face? Like its forward-thinking Under Construction parent album, Missy's "Work It" video made it clear that what was normal was boring, and the future belonged to those who weren't afraid to defy expectations, conventions, and even gravity on occasion. -- J. Lynch

1. Lady Gaga, "Bad Romance" (dir. Francis Lawrence, 2009)

By the time she crawled out of your mom’s Volvo roof box to deliver her first rah-rah-rahs, Lady Gaga had already hosted a poolside orgy, transformed the subway into her debaucherous lair, and sought poisonous revenge on Alexander Skarsgård for throwing her off the edge of a castle. Her ideas were big; her budgets were catching up. But the video for “Bad Romance,” the lead single from 2009’s The Fame Monster, went beyond the kind of spectacle that rising superstars like her had the resources to pull off. It offered a glimpse into an entire cinematic world that thrilled and disturbed in equal measure, expanding the possibilities of what a music video could achieve -- and challenging other stars to step their game up at the same time.

“Bad Romance” features some of her most gorgeous music-video looks -- as silly as it seems now in the post-Joanne era, the video was praised by some critics for the “stripped-down” and “normal” makeup on display -- as well as her most unsettling. The white crowned bodysuits look like Max from Where the Wild Things Are hit up a fetish club. The bathtub-bound Gaga with CGI-enlarged eyes beckoned to the uncanny valley. And despite all the glossy, sterile exteriors abound, an element of body horror lurks underneath the surface, from shots that linger over dancers’ exaggerated bony spines to the emaciated Gaga-monster hiding in a cage during the second verse. Pause the video at any moment and you’ll probably find yourself starting at something worth dissecting; even the briefest scenes and cutaways -- Gaga suspended in a cloud of diamonds, Gaga covering her face with razor-blade sunglasses, Gaga stomping around in alienesque Alexander McQueen heels -- could have sustained their own storylines as standalone videos.

Those mini-moments were mostly in service of a bigger story, one in which Gaga gets kidnapped and drugged by models, sold into some kind of sexual slavery via an ominous pack of Russian men, and eventually enacts a fiery revenge plot. Considering how “Bad Romance” cemented the branding and iconography of her “Little Monster” fanbase -- witness the birth of the monster claw! -- it’s a little ironic that Gaga has described the video’s plot as an allegory about the entertainment industry, one that asks viewers to examine their relationship to their idols, what they ask of them, and at what cost they get it.

Of course, Lady Gaga would go on to make more elaborate music videos than “Bad Romance” -- the mini-movie that was “Telephone,” the space opera that was “Born This Way,” each weaving in social commentary in both obvious and subtle ways. But more than providing any one look, dance move, or message, "Bad Romance" was a supernova reminder that there was still so much room to push the art form -- and that no one was more game to lead the charge than the free bitch herself, baby. It’s fitting that the video ends with the singer torching the place and everything in her path, lying among the embers and shooting sparks out of her pyro-bra. With “Bad Romance,” she took the old standard for great music videos and set it aflame, then got to work building a new one. -- N.F.

This content was originally published here.

[thomasgmcelwain]

Genesis 35

Genesis 35

1 Said Ælohim  to Jacob, "Now

Get up, go up to Bethel and

Live there, and make an altar how

To worship there by My command,

El, El God, who appeared to you

When you fled without friend or crew

From the wrath and the angry face

Of brother Esau to this place."

When it is to the purpose of my profit

Or my safety, I find no way to scoff at

The claim that You, Beloved, give me advice

To do whatever I myself think nice.

When Jacob thought the people's vengeance came

Too close, he had a vision to his shame

That drove him out and helped him save his face.

"Oh no, it's not for fear I leave this place

Nor shame my sons are murderers by band.

I got a vision from the dear Lord God,

And that's the only reason I take rod

In hand and head toward the Río Grande."

Beloved, when I obey let there be no

Advantage in my going when I go.

2 And Jacob said to his household

And to all with him, "Now, be bold,

Put away the foreign gods that

Are with you, enter dyeing vat

And purify yourselves, and change

Your garments, that is nothing strange.

3 "Then let us get up and go up

To Bethel, and I shall lift cup

Of sacrifice and I shall make

An altar there to El God El,

Who answered me, and for my sake,

In the day of my heavenly spell,

And my distress and He has been

With me on the way that I'm in."

It was not just Rachel his wife that had

Those foreign gods. Jacob was not that bad.

It was the passel of Shechemite herd

Of womenfolk and children, in a word,

The widowed and the orphaned by the hand

Of Jacob's sons, who followed the command

Of foreign gods, fat, breasted terra cotta

Baked figurines to help the crops or ought to.

If Jacob's sons are bloody men, the man

Himself turns all to missions when he can.

He set the pattern for the world to come,

Since blood and theft are missionaries' sum.

Beloved, speak to each human heart direct,

Make missions a redundance to reject.

4 So they gave Jacob all the gods

The foreign gods of sods and clods

In their hands, and the earrings which

Were in their ears, and Jacob hid

Them under a tree without hitch,

The terebinth by Shechem's mid.

5 And they journeyed, and they went on,

Ælohim's terror was upon

The cities that were all around,

Not to run Jacob's in the ground.

Why earrings too? The Torah makes such rings

As put in ear with awl shot through the things

To show eternal servantship and true.

That's why the celibates do what they do.

It seems these earrings with their weight in gold

Convinced their wearers that the gods of old,

Whose bodies and flesh made of gold repair

To modern wearers, come in state and fair

To perch below the ears in those things made

Of divine bodies pounded, plied and stayed.

Who seek the gold seek idols under trees

That are of no worth other than to please.

Give me, Beloved, such pleasure in the fading

Of flowers more gold than those in ears parading.

6 So Jacob came to Luz (that is,

Bethel), in Canaan's land, and his

People with him and all they'd found.

7 He built an altar there and called

The place El Bethel, there installed,

Because there Ælohim appeared

To him when he fled and he feared

Before his brother, and appalled.

8 Now Deborah, Rebekah's nurse,

Died, and was buried for the worse

Below Bethel beneath a tree,

The terebinth. So came to be

Its name Allon Bachuth, which see,

Means oak of weeping, such a curse.

Now Deborah, Beloved, is hardly known,

Except by her great namesake who was shown

To be among the greatest women prophets.

Poor Deborah was not one with great profits,

A wet-nurse, she had her own family

That trailed to Luz behind her hopefully,

A son perhaps or daughter and their own

Offspring, the nameless servants there to groan

And weep at loss of mother and grandmother.

Of all the women in Jacob's life she

Was probably better than any other.

She no doubt took loved Joseph from the womb,

And cared for him and loved him in the bloom

Of her own grandsons. Blessed may Deborah be!

9 Then Ælohim appeared again

To our dear Jacob, when he came

From Padan Aram with his men,

And blessed him for what he became.

10 And Ælohim said to him, "Your

Name is Jacob, your name no more

Shall be called Jacob for your fame,

But Israel shall be your name." So

He called his name Israel. 11 Also

Ælohim said to him, "I am

El El God Almighty, no sham.

Be fruitful, multiply, a nation

And company of nations shall

Proceed from you, and your location,

And kings from you perpetual.

12 "The land which I gave Abraham

And Isaac I give you, I am

Giving to your descendants too

This very land come after you."

13 Then Ælohim went up from him

In the place where He talked with him.

14 So Jacob set up there a pillar

In the place where He talked with him,

A pillar of stone as instiller

Of memory, and he poured drink

Offering on it, and oil to sink.

15 And Jacob called the name of it

Bethel, where Ælohim spoke fit.

Just here is where you made, Beloved, mistake.

You set aside this land for Abram's sake.

And now You seem to give it all to one,

To Jacob, who is not the only son.

No doubt it's Your intention to affirm

His right after his absence from the firm.

But just see what an impasse came between

Ishmael's children and Jacob's. Intervene!

To Abraham You give the broadest stretch

From Nile to Euphrates, both corn and vetch.

To Jacob You give lesser room below,

A pillar and a stone, but more to show,

A ladder reaching up to heaven above,

An offering and its oil, a gift of love.

16 Then they journeyed from Bethel down

To not far from Ephrath, the town,

And Rachel laboured in childbirth,

And had hard labour on the earth.

17 Now it happened, when she was in

Hard labour and harsh discipline,

The midwife said to her, "Don't fear,

Your second son too shall appear."

18 And so it was, with soul departing

(For she died from the birth-sting smarting),

That she called his name Ben-Oni,

But father called him Benjamin.

19 So Rachel died and was buried

On the way to Ephrath (but read

Bethlehem). 20 And Jacob set up

A pillar on her grave no tup

Might overturn, and to this day

Rachel's grave's pillar's in the way.

Son of my sorrow ought to be the name

Since that was the last wish, his mother's claim.

But Jacob wanted to be positive

And this was his chance to have his own way

As well as superciliously to give

A name for one he would be proud to say

On any Canaanitish market day.

Son of my sorrow would remember blame

As well as call to mind the shoddy game

That Jacob always played, and to his shame,

With kith and kin. Despite his machinations,

Beloved, You blessed him in all his relations

And in his tackle and his gear. Bless me,

Beloved, as him and for eternity.

21 Then Israel journeyed, pitched his tent

Beyond Eder's tower. 22 As it went,

When Israel lived in that land, that

Reuben lay with Bilhah, the rat,

She was his father's concubine,

And Israel heard the libertine.

The Hebrew text, at least applied by note

And music mark the Massoretics wrote,

Cannot be read, at least not cantillated,

To understand. The text is separated

Into three halves, which does not lend support

To mathematically accurate report.

Three halves are one too many, to be sure,

And that may be the meaning in the pure.

Reuben was one too many in the bed,

Which was true and a hard thing to be said.

And so the cantillating tongue is tripped

On triple halves confounding one verse sipped.

Beloved, let there be no halves, no, nor thirds,

But only One, You only and Your words.

Now the sons of Jacob were twelve.

23 Their names were, we can dig and delve:

The sons of Leah were Reuben,

Jacob's firstborn, and Simeon,

Levi, Judah, Issachar, and

Zebulon. 24 The sons of Rachel

Were Joseph and last Benjamin.

25 The sons of Bilhah, on command

To Rachel, were Dan and as well

Naphtali. 26 And then Zilpah's sons,

Leah's maidservant, were the ones

Named Gad and Asher. These were all

The sons of Jacob great and small

Born to him in Padan Aram,

All descendants of Abraham.

The names of the twelve sons are so arranged

To represent the twelve steps never changed

In entering the palace and the city,

The temple of the holy and the witty.

The names of Ishmael's twelve had set the pace,

And here the twelve of Jacob join the race.

Each slot in human searching for divine

Is captured in one word each for the sign.

Behold a son begins the traveller's toil

Until he reach the blessedness and soil

Of Asher in the gate of earth and see

That all the gates return eternally

Upon the bright slopes of reality.

Beloved, anoint all twelve names with Your oil.

27 Then Jacob came to his father

Isaac at Mamre, or rather

Kirjath Arba (that is, Hebron),

Where Abraham had lived with son

Isaac. 28 Now Isaac's lifespan was

One hundred eighty years, 29 because

Isaac breathed his last and he died,

Was gathered to his people's side,

Well aged. His sons like seraphim,

Esau and Jacob, buried him.

#The Beloved and I

[getyourgossip0-blog]

The 100 Greatest Music Videos of the 21st Century: Critics' Picks

New Post has been published on https://getyourgossip.xyz/the-100-greatest-music-videos-of-the-21st-century-critics-picks/

The 100 Greatest Music Videos of the 21st Century: Critics' Picks

At the dawn of the 21st century, the music video was in a boom period: The TRL era was still at its zenith, CDs were flying out of the stores, budgets for music videos were still regularly in the seven-digit range, and MTV was the place you turned to in order to see the latest clips from pop’s best and brightest.

Flash forward to 2018, and none of those things are true anymore. Album sales have been depleted by the rise of downloading and then streaming, MTV has been supplanted by the Internet as the video’s primary home, and attempts to reboot TRL only prove how different times are now than when Backstreet and Britney ruled the world. But with all that’s changed, the music video still reigns paramount in the pop world, as a conversation-starter, as a starmaker, as a cementer of legacy. Though the ways we consume music videos in 2018 would’ve been almost unthinkable at century’s start, the impact they have on our lives and pop culture remains relatively similar. 

But of course, it’s been an interesting ride for the music video to get to this point: From the tail end of MTV’s peak to the introduction of YouTube and the minting of the viral star to the rise of social media and the countless different forms the video can now take in 2018. This week, Billboard is reflecting on the evolution of the music video with a week’s worth of content about the form’s past, present and future — starting, today, with a list of our staff picks for the 100 greatest music videos of the century so far, essentially telling the story of the form during its middle-age period, and a potential crisis ultimately averted. 

See our staff favorites below, with a YouTube playlist of all available clips at the bottom, and get lost in the recent greatest hits of an artform that continues to be among popular culture’s most vital.

100. Fall Out Boy, “Sugar We’re Goin Down” (dir. Matt Lenski, 2005)

[embedded content]

From Under the Cork Tree’s lead single was much of the world’s introduction to these former hardcore punks from the Chicago burbs, and for their first video with a big ol’ Island Records budget, they indulged their mission statement: a full-on underdog’s folk tale. Our small town teenaged protagonist is a sort of Napoleon Dynamite with — get this! — deer-like antlers, an effective stand-in for just about any condition that could have left a young Fall Out Boy feeling socially alienated. His love interest’s shotgun-wielding father doesn’t approve, but in the end, let’s just say he’s behooved to sympathize. — CHRIS PAYNE

99. Shakira, “Whenever, Wherever” (dir. Francis Lawrence, 2001)

The video for Shakira’s first English-language hit is not her most seen; those honor belong to the Maluma-featuring “Chantaje” and World Cup anthem “Waka Waka (This Time for Africa),” both with around two billion YouTube views. But “Whenever, Wherever” was the video that introduced Shakira’s swiveling hips to the world, as well as her “small and humble” breasts. The minimalist production, which memorably featured Shakira dancing alone without props, musicians or other dancers, was enough to catapult her to international stardom. — LEILA COBO

98. Scissor Sisters, “Let’s Have a Kiki” (dir. Vern Moen, 2012)

Ana Matronic, Jake Shears, and the rest of the crew served up a brilliant DIY instructional dance video for their unlikely viral hit, which became their third No. 1 hit on the U.S. Dance Club Songs chart in 2012. The smartly staged and creatively choreographed one-take clip is as unpolished, campy, and full of energy as the Scissors themselves. — PATRICK CROWLEY

97. Adele, “Rolling in the Deep” (dir. Sam Brown, 2010)

The room full of glasses of water gently quaking to the bass drum heartbeat of “Rolling in the Deep,” like Jurassic Park to the tenth power, was appropriately foreboding for what Adele’s 21 ended up being, a commercial behemoth the likes of which was supposed to have long gone extinct. It all starts here: Director Sam Brown capturing the once-in-a-generation vocalist at simultaneously her most vulnerable and her most powerful, unclear if the wreckage surrounding her is representative of her internal turmoil, or a direct result of it. — ANDREW UNTERBERGER​

96. Frank Ocean, “Pyramids” (dir. Nabil Elderkin, 2012)

Opening with color bars, liquor shots, and gun blasts, this Nabil-directed 8-minute odyssey follows a zonked-out Frank Ocean as he zips across the desert on a motorcycle, giggles his way through a strip club, and runs into John Mayer in the middle of nowhere for a woozy, bluesy guitar solo. Landing somewhere between Lost Highway and Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, “Pyramids” is a dusty, neon-drenched vision quest that’s hard to shake. – JOE LYNCH

95. The Avalanches, “Frontier Psychiatrist” (dir. Tom Kuntz & Mike Maguire, 2000)

Music videos can sometimes feel unimaginative when they simply translate a song’s lyrics into a four-minute clip, but for the Avalanches’ “Frontier Psychiatrist,” the literal approach also happened to be the wildest one. The Australian electronic group’s mishmash of vocal samples is acted out as theater, with dueling therapists, chattering dentures, an old guy with a turtle body, and a ghost chorus comprising a visual representation both surreal and enduring. — JASON LIPSHUTZ

94. Ariana Grande feat. Zedd, “Break Free” (dir. Chris Marrs Piliero, 2014)

“Brace yourself for something so fantastically fantastical that you’ll soil yourself from intergalactic excitement” reads part of the tongue-in-cheek Star Wars-style scroll that introduces Ariana Grande’s video for “Break Free.” The stakes in this outer space-based video are as high as Grande’s ponytail, as she uses her blaster to shoot down guards and free prisoners. But wait! Ari herself has been taken captive! Will she… break free?! Yes, and then she will board a spaceship where Zedd is both captain and DJ. Phew. — CHRISTINE WERTHMAN

93. Aaliyah, “Rock the Boat” (dir. Hype Williams, 2001)

The video for Aaliyah’s sinuous “Rock the Boat” might have easily gone down as just one of the many examples of the beloved singer’s preternatural cool and low-key sex appeal, featuring Aaliyah leading an all-female ensemble in understatedly sexy moves mirroring the song’s hypnotic, undulating melody. But it’s impossible to watch without feeling a deep pang of sadness: Directly after filming this video, Aaliyah and eight others were killed in a plane crash over the Bahamas. “Rock the Boat” begins with an in memoriam of sorts, and as the video starts, Aaliyah walks on a deserted beach beneath a sky so beatifically sunlit, it could very well be heaven. The video ends with a gorgeous shot of her swimming alone, trailed by billowy silk, toward a surface that seems contiguous with the clouds. In between, we’re reminded of an artist who was an effortlessly entrancing dancer and singer, a happy young woman with so much ahead of her — before she floats off to somewhere else. — REBECCA MILZOFF

92. Girls’ Generation, “Gee” (dir. Cho Soo-hyun,  2009)

One of the biggest K-pop hits ever, Girls’ Generation’s saccharine electro-pop anthem “Gee” was key to making the nonet one of South Korea’s biggest pop acts, largely thanks to its video’s living mannequins, viral “crab” dance, and  brightly hued outfits. The success of it led to the group releasing further videos that rank among K-pop’s all-time most recognizable, including “Genie” and “I Got A Boy,” but nothing will ever replace this 2009 music video for its critical spot in the genre’s history. — TAMAR HERMAN

91. Tim McGraw, “Humble and Kind” (dir. Wes Edwards, 2016)

It would have been understandably tempting to make a video that interpreted the song as literally as songwriter Lori McKenna intended: As a message to her children. But instead, the clip — with assistance from OWN’s series Belief (thanks, Oprah!) and McGraw’s understated delivery — turns the tune into a grander prayer that celebrates our universal humanity and diversity through scenes of people from all ethnicities and religions. — MELINDA NEWMAN

90. Marina & The DIamonds, “How to Be a Heartbreaker” (dir. Marc & Ish, 2012)

[embedded content]

Six years ago, Marina Diamandis gave us a video with six showering Calvin Klein models juxtaposed with a clothed woman, gloriously flipping what is unfortunately still the modern standard. (Each guy is wearing a Speedo, mind you.) As she sings about her guide to breaking you-know-whats, Marina alternates between cozying up to different gentlemen, dancing in the shower, and presenting a severed, bloodied mannequin head on a platter to the camera. It’s hard to know who you’re supposed to be drooling over in this visual — Marina, or the male models? — and that’s the whole point. — GAB GINSBERG

89. Mitski, “Your Best American Girl” (dir. Zia Anger, 2016)

Mitski’s songwriting is often spiked with a dark, sharp sense of humor. The visual for her shrugging, contemplative Puberty 2 single “Your Best American Girl,” directed by longtime collaborator Zia Anger, brings that wit to the forefront, trapping the Japanese-American artist in a love triangle with an all-too-familiar cute white hipster and his Coachella-ready girlfriend as the song’s lyrics muse on cultural clashes and ethnic identity. It’s hard not to roll your eyes as the couple cuddles naked under an American flag (seriously, guys?), leaving our heroine to make out with her own hand like a lovesick middle-schooler, channeling rage into electric guitar. Not too much subtlety here, but the video’s almost uncomfortably on-the-nose references are exactly what make it so brilliant, with just the right dose of funny. — TATIANA CIRISANO

88. Kanye West feat. Dwele, “Flashing Lights” (dir. Spike Jonze, 2007)

Kanye West would be the first to tell you he’s more than just an artist — he’s an innovator, on the same intellectual playing field as Walt Disney and Steve Jobs. And when it comes to visual manifestations of or companion pieces to his music, well, he’s not always totally wrong. The video for “Flashing Lights” isn’t as dazzling or frenzied as videos for hits like “Gold Digger” and “All of the Lights,” but the tension between the thump of the song and the slow-mo, one-shot portrait of a beautiful woman committing heinous acts of violence makes the clip as unsettlingly hypnotic as the trance-like intonation of its chorus. — STEVEN J. HOROWITZ

87. David Bowie, “Lazarus” (dir. Johan Renck, 2016)

Shortly after David Bowie succumbed to liver cancer on Jan. 10, 2016, his longtime producer and friend Tony Visconti wrote in a Facebook tribute, “His death was not different from his life – a work of Art.”  He most certainly was referring to “Blackstar” and “Lazarus,” the haunting and bleak final two music videos that the legend left behind. Both are rich with references to Bowie canon — Major Tom, Station to Station — and optimally should be seen in tandem. But “Lazarus” delivers the bigger gut punch because it is Bowie’s acknowledgement that he is not long for this earth, a video cut with scenes of the gaunt artist writhing on what could be his deathbed, his head wrapped in a bandage with buttons for eyes. Watch the video, then venture down the rabbit hole of Bowie-ologists deconstructing the video’s meaning: The Starman may have left the building, but he did so in a way that insures his artistic immortality. — FRANK DIGIACOMO

86. The Lonely Island, “Lazy Sunday” (dir. Akiva Schaffer, 2005)

“Lazy Sunday” has the distinction of being the only video on this list to originate from television — the historic first official Digital Short on SNL, preceding future classics like “I’m On A Boat” and “Dick in a Box,” and setting the template for the first wave of YouTube viral videos. “Lazy Sunday” lives on in infamy because of the sheer ridiculousness of their investment in the song’s mundanity: Andy Samberg and Chris Parnell rap about going to see The Chronicles of Narnia, but not before “macking on some cupcakes” from Magnolia Bakery and shouting out answers to movie theater Matthew Perry trivia. Part of the video’s allure is its low-production quality — it looks like it was shot by high schoolers in an afternoon — going to show that you don’t need a million-dollar budget to make a classic music video. Perhaps all you need is a camcorder and smartly dumb lyrics. — XANDER ZELLNER

85. Grimes, “Kill v. Maim” (dir. Claire Boucher & Mac Boucher, 2016)

Grimes made all our cyberpunk dreams come true with the “Kill v. Maim” video. The singer previously explained that the song’s inspiration was for a fictional movie that was “a mixture of Godfather and Twilight,” but the video itself transports the viewer into a wild post-apocalyptic world: Imagine if Final Fantasy took place in the Mad Max universe… but was also shot in Harajuku in the ‘90s. And what better way to end this giddy mix of cult-film homages than with an ode to Blade’s bloody rave scene? — BIANCA GRACIE

84. Alicia Keys, “You Don’t Know My Name” (dir. Chris Robinson, 2003)

It’s as vivid a straightforward rendering of song narrative as 21st-century music video has produced, with Alicia Keys and fictional love interest Mos Def acting out Keys’ Songs in A Minor melodrama as a brilliant blur of fantasy and reality. Director Chris Robinson’s sumptuous New York visuals make the theatrics pop with both pleasing familiarity and near-uncomfortable intimacy, lifting you into Keys’ daydream — right up to the crushing ending, when it turns out that Mos never will know just how different she looks outside of her work clothes. — A.U.

83. Residente, “Descencuentro” (dir. Residente, 2017)

Residente — and prior to him, Calle 13 — has long been known for his gritty, graphic, often violent video material. But his softer, romantic side is even more compelling, and the second video from his 2017 self-titled solo outing is drenched in love, the kind that sends shivers down your spine. Filmed in Paris’ iconic Crémerie-Restaurant Polidor bistro and starring Charlotte Le Bon and Edgar Ramirez, “Descencuentro” (directed by Residente himself) is a mini-film about a man and a woman whose inevitable encounter inside the restaurant is delayed by a string of happenstance that goes from accidental to comical. “I wanted to stay away from clichés, but stay close to hope, to what motivates you to keep on trying in the midst of so many setbacks,” Residente told Billboard. The end result is breathtakingly (and unexpectedly) lovely. — L.C.

82. FKA twigs, “Papi Pacify” (dir. Tom Beard & FKA twigs, 2013)

If a music video can leave you with one indelible image, it’s done good work. The video for “Papi Pacify” is one of the most erotic clips in recent memory, opening with a silent shot of a tall, brawny man with one hand around twigs’ throat and the other curling at her mouth. “It’s meant to ask questions of the viewer,” co-director Tom Beard told The Guardian. “Who’s got the control in this relationship? Who’s got the power?” There’s no unbraiding the sexual charge from the discomfort, just as there’s no forgetting the shot at 2:23, when twigs holds your gaze as the man takes his fingers from her mouth and pulls her into his chest as she continues to stare, looking nothing if not serene. — ROSS SCARANO

81. A$AP Rocky, “Peso” (dir. Abteen Bagheri, 2010)

The low-budget street video, shot in the artist’s neighborhood, is a hip-hop staple, and one of the best 21st century entries in the genre drops you in Harlem for an annunciation. Is there a more invigorating entrance in contemporary rap than Rocky busting through a sticker-covered bodega door wearing a black baseball cap that reads FUNERAL, while rapping, “I be that pretty motherfucker”? The money spent shows up in the form of Rick Owens, Raf Simons and Supreme, but the swag is priceless. — R.S.

80. Miley Cyrus, “We Can’t Stop” (dir. Diane Martel, 2013)

[embedded content]

There’s tiptoeing into a new era, and then there’s diving in headfirst: Following her underperforming Can’t Be Tamed album, Miley Cyrus chose the latter in 2013, reinventing herself in the first video from the Bangerz campaign and boldly kickstarting her adult career. The “We Can’t Stop” video features a house party full of debauchery and twerking, but for all of the hip-hop excess Cyrus was clearly cribbing from, Diane Martel’s clip also provides several uniquely off-kilter set pieces, from the giant-teddy-bear-backpack dance sequence to the game of kick-the-french-fry-skull. — J. Lipshutz

79. Madonna, “Hung Up” (dir. Johan Renck, 2006)

Faced with relationship trouble, a pop queen doesn’t cry it out — she dances it out. Madonna’s ‘80s-infused video for the ABBA-borrowing Confessions On A Dance Floor smash “Hung Up” turns the star’s sweaty, solo aerobics workout into a therapy session where all you need to squelch anxiety is a pink leotard and a boombox. The visual only gets better as it expands to scenes resembling a Los Angeles street corner, a subway car, and a Chinese restaurant, where crowds of all ages, races, and ethnicities erupt into fiery dance battles of their own. Meant as a tribute to John Travolta’s ubiquitous dance roles in film, the whole thing ends (how else?) with Madonna breaking it down on an arcade Dance Dance Revolution machine — not bad for a star who broke several bones in a horseback-riding accident just weeks before shooting. — T.C.

78. Toby Keith, “Red Solo Cup” (dir. Michael Salomon, 2011)

These days, it might be hard for many viewers to get past the first word of the title when watching the video for Toby Keith’s highest-charting, least-resistible Hot 100 hit, especially considering the cameo-strewn close featuring fellow Red-alligned rocker Ted Nugent, among others. But the 2011 clip is such a clever and pure distillation of the forever unpartisan joys of filling your cup, lifting it up and proceeding to parrr-tayyyyyy that it’ll make you seethe with nostalgia for a time, perhaps only imagined, when a superior brand of kegger supplies was all you needed to reach across the aisle for. — A.U.

77. Gotye feat. Kimbra, “Somebody That I Used to Know” (dir. Natasha Pincus, 2011)

Behold one of the few instances in which a music video helped launch a relatively unknown act to No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100. Gotye’s haunting “Somebody That I Used to Know” visual shows the frontman and duet partner Kimbra naked in front of a blank backdrop, then slowly painted over via stop-motion animation, a living artifact of what used to be a relationship. The design, inspired by an actual work done by Gotye’s father, Frank De Backer, took 23 hours and helped the video surpass the 1 billion-views mark on YouTube. — X.Z.

76. ANOHNI, “Drone Bomb Me” (dir. Nabil Elderkin, 2016)

ANOHNI’s 2016 solo debut Hopelessness combined dazzling experimental pop with the sort of radical social activism most prominent musicians are too timid to approach. For this Hudson Mohawke- and Oneohtrix Point Never-produced song, ANOHNI sings from the perspective of a nine year-old Afghani girl whose family has just been killed by a drone bomb, her despair sending her atop a mountain to demand she be taken next. In the gripping, exquisitely produced video (bankrolled by Apple in a move ANOHNI later regretted), a teary-eyed Naomi Campbell gives a sublime performance, lip-synching and tantalizingly dancing along to the this glistening dirge while a team of dancers contorts around her.  — C.P.

75. Kendrick Lamar, “i” (dir. Alexandre Moors, 2014)

If this video had come out even two years later, the dance that Kendrick rolls out throughout the visual might have spawned enough challenge/meme copies to send it all the way to the top of the charts, rather than the mere No. 39 it topped out at on the Hot 100. As it stands, the video is a clever nod to both the song’s influences — sampled artist Ronald Isley is in on the party throughout, while George Clinton makes a nonchalant cameo reading a copy of his own autobiography outside a club — and to the darker forces underlying the song’s self-love ethos. — DAN RYS

74. Dua Lipa, “New Rules” (dir. Henry Scholfield, 2017)

Some new new rules: 1. Launch a thousand Pinterest boards with a beachy pastel color scheme and an enviable hotel slumber party. 2. Take unlikely inspiration from the animal kingdom with head-bobbing choreography meant to evoke the fidgety movements of a pack of flamingos. (No, really!) 3. Embrace the storytelling power of repetition for a dance routine whose third-act twist still delights as much as it did the first time. Follow those steps, and you’ll earn admission to YouTube’s billion-views club — and maybe fast-track yourself to a level of international superstardom that half a dozen prior singles couldn’t snag. — NOLAN FEENEY

73. Janelle Monáe feat. Big Boi, “Tightrope” (dir. Wendy Morgan, 2010)

To those who are just discovering the genius of Janelle Monae with her Dirty Computer rollout: Where have you been? From her futuristic “Many Moons” video to her uncomfortably direct “Cold War” clip, Monáe has consistently delivered on the visuals. “Tightrope” showcases Monae’s swagger-for-days as she gyrates through an insane asylum, rocking her early-career androgynous style and delivering some impressive soft-shoe. — P.C.

72. Sum 41, “Fat Lip” (dir. Marc Klasfeld, 2001)

From its opening beatbox freestyle to its closing tongue wag, “Fat Lip” couldn’t have been a better encapsulation of the pop-punk ’00s if it had been directed by a sentient Hot Topic bracelet: It’s all shaved heads, half-pipes, convenience stores, and four-star frosted tips, as the snottiest bunch of snots that ever snotted perform from a literal pit of dirt. For extra flat-sole kicks, check the hair-metal-homaging “Pain for Pleasure” outro that often played with “Fat Lip” on MTV, proving that adolescent rawk brattiness knows no generation gap. — A.U.

71. Kylie Minogue, “Come Into My World” (dir. Michel Gondry, 2002)

No music video director works sleight-of-film better than Michel Gondry, the guy who turned a countryside train voyage into Chemical Brothers sheet music or a theatrical Björk drama into a cinematic matryoshka doll. But his greatest cinematic achievement may remain Kylie Minogue’s four-lap trek around the streets of Paris, with Kylie and her universe’s neighbors somehow layering on top of themselves each time she passes Go. It’s a marvel that remains magical 16 years later — though one that might make you reticent to accept her titular invitation, since it seems like her World barely has room for one of you, let alone four. — A.U.

70. Ozuna, “Se Preparo” (dir. Nuno Gomes, 2017)

[embedded content]

Ozuna is Latin music’s current master of the video universe: The Puerto Rican reggaeton/trap star has so many great videos to his name, it’s hard to settle on a favorite. But “Se Preparo,” with its mix of whimsy and edge, is as fun as the song is compelling. Directed by Venezuelan video master Nuno Gomez, who delights in storytelling, it sets the stage for the wronged girl, who, to forget her boyfriend’s infidelities, preps for a night on the town with the girls. Except it’s actually an elaborate ruse to get even — one that keeps you watching till the hilarious end. — L.C.

69. JAY-Z, “The Story of O.J.” (dir. JAY-Z & Mark Romanek, 2017)

A theme of Jay’s work of late has been taking stereotypes and tropes about the black community and forcing them right in front of his audience’s faces. Seldom has that ever been more clear than in the “O.J.” video, which lifts its inspiration from a set of racist Looney Tunes cartoons from the ’40s, casting himself and others in blackface and hammering home the message of the song’s lyrics through the visual. It’s among the best examples of this in his catalog. — D.R.

68. Kesha, “Blow” (dir. Chris Marrs Piliero, 2010)

“She was adamant you can’t back away from the crazy” was how director Chris Marrs Piliero summarized the Artist Formerly Known as K-Money’s approach to the “Blow” video, which sounds about right: Lasers, unicorns, muenster cheese, no-soap-radio jokes, a pre-meme James Van der Beek, and a whole lot of glitter (natch) combine in the “Blow” video for a visual of singular early-’10s lunacy. That the era’s cheekiest director and most game pop star only worked together once remains a bummer, but their sole collab remains a slice of pure lactose gold. — A.U.

67. BTS, “Blood, Sweat & Tears” (dir. Choi Yongseok & Ko Yoojeong, 2016)

“Blood, Sweat & Tears” is the thesis for BTS as a K-pop group whose work is rich for interpretation. The grab-bag of high-art references makes this music video ripe for fan theories. Cut to a museum filled with European Renaissance replications: Michelangelo’s Pietà explodes! Van Goghian sky swirls abound! V jumps off a balcony in front of a painting of the fallen Icarus! Amid this lavish portrait of BTS at the height of their game, one thing is clear: the septet makes K-pop for the thinking fan. — CAITLIN KELLEY

66. Ludacris feat. Shawnna, “Stand Up” (dir. Dave Meyers, 2003)

The clip for Luda’s first Billboard Hot 100 No. 1 is more bizarre than it has any right to be. A kiss from ‘Cris makes a woman’s ass expand to cartoonish size, after which Luda puts on a Sideshow Bob-sized sneaker to start stomping the dancefloor and bring the house down (literally). At the end of the video, Luda and Shawnna’s faces are superimposed onto baby bodies, and we’re treated to Baby Luda dancing Ally McBeal-style, before an unlucky woman changes his soiled diaper. Why? Who knows! But when he moved in 2003, we followed, just like that. — J. Lynch

65. Red Hot Chili Peppers, “Californication” (dir. Jonathan Dayton & Valerie Faris, 2000)

The Red Hot Chili Peppers’ video for “Californication” features the quartet navigating everything from the Hollywood Walk of Fame and movie studios to San Francisco and the Sierra Nevada Mountains — only as avatars of themselves in an imaginary video game, racking up high scores and eventually meeting at the center of the earth. As fun as the stunning and innovative visuals are, it’s the juxtaposition with the song’s melancholy lyrics that still lingers well after it’s Game Over. — DENISE WARNER

64. Missy Elliott, “Gossip Folks” (dir. Dave Meyers, 2002)

Most everything seems a whole lot more fun in the crazy-colorful, twisted realm of Missy music videos: Even the gossip-fueled, bully-ridden hallways of high school. Back in a pre-social-media 2002, Elliott heard all the whispers about her recent and somewhat drastic weight loss, her sexual orientation, and more, so she channeled her frustration into an eminently danceable track and classic video. Ludacris and Ms. Jade make stellar guest appearances; Tweet, Eve, and Trina keep score as the coolest clique ever in the cafeteria scenes; even Darryl “DMC” McDaniels shows up for a late cameo as a school bus driver.  But then there’s the real stars of the video — three little girls with better moves than most grown-ups (including now-pro Alyson Stoner), and a closing image that might be Elliott’s most brilliant touch of all: a mural depicting the late Aaliyah, Lisa “Left Eye” Lopez, and Jam Master Jay, reminding her audience that, just maybe, the industry could focus on more important things than gossip, folks. — R.M.

63. Ciara, “Promise” (dir. Diane Martel, 2006)

Ciara has spent much of her videography trying to defy gravity — consider the Matrix-style back-bend she first debuted with “Goodies” and later honed in clips like “Gimme Dat” and “Like a Boy.” But with a little movie magic, Ciara actually pulled it off for 2006’s “Promise,” turning a microphone stand into a worthy dance partner through a G-rated pole workout that shook its butt in the face of laws of physics. Ciara’s legacy as an artist is as much about her dancing as it is her music, and “Promise,” with its magic mic and the sheer athleticism of Ciara’s hypnotic hip rolls, is the most entertaining distillation of all her talents. — N.F.

62. Bat for Lashes, “What’s a Girl to Do” (dir. Dougal Wilson, 2006)

Dougal Wilson directed this single-shot video in which Natasha Khan takes a late-night bike ride with some of her best pals, a foreboding brood of hoodie-wearing guys in creepy animal masks, a la Donnie Darko’s Frank. According to a 2009 interview, Khan wanted the director to model the video after films like E.T., The Goonies, The Karate Kid, and even the aforementioned Gyllenhaal cult classic, movies that she dubbed “hoodie movies,” because they featured boys wearing hoodies and riding bikes, “a symbolic reference to breaking out of their suburban trappings and going on this journey of self-discovery.” Wilson nails the sentiment, only this journey comes with more sick bike tricks. — C.W.

61. Rihanna, “Bitch Better Have My Money” (dir. Rihanna & Megaforce, 2015)

A year before labeling herself a savage, Rihanna had already proved she was the baddest gal in town with 2015’s “Bitch Better Have My Money” video. The murderous affair, co-directed by the singer and Megaforce, is a menacing “don’t fuck with me” message to her real-life former accountant, portrayed here by Hannibal‘s Mads Mikkelsen. Rihanna and her badass female sidekicks play the stars of their own revenge fantasy film as they torture his rich white wife, and the final scene is nothing short of chilling, with a blood-soaked Rihanna lighting up a joint while resting in a trunk full of cash. — B.G.

60. Justice, “D.A.N.C.E.” (dir. Jonas & Francois, 2007)

[embedded content]

Who knew that the video for a song called “D.A.N.C.E.” could be built around two guys… walking… for the entire video… and still be a huge win? Justice’s Gaspard Augé and Xavier de Rosnay stroll through the duo’s most popular clip as their t-shirts morph into mesmerizing pop-art displays, capturing the crossover hit’s effervescence through a series of slogans and cartoons. “D.A.N.C.E.” was nominated for video of the year at the 2007 MTV VMAs, turning Justice into dance headliners (pun intended) years before EDM took over every American festival. — J. Lipshutz

59. Robyn, “Call Your Girlfriend” (dir. Max Vitali, 2011)

In one continuous three-and-a-half minute shot, Robyn manages to hold your attention in the music video for “Call Your Girlfriend.” The video simply shows Robyn dancing and singing in an empty soundstage, wearing a furry top and looking like her own heart has just been shattered, but it feels impossible to look away. The clip was often parodied and recreated after its release, most notably by former SNL cast member Taran Killam, in which he filmed a near-perfect recreation of the video in the show’s writers room at 4:00 a.m. — X.Z.

58. Christina Aguilera, “Beautiful” (dir. Jonas Åkerlund, 2002)

Christina Aguilera eloquently touches on insecurity in the Jonas Åkerlund-directed “Beautiful,” as the dark-lit scenes underscore the decimation that occurs when someone is ostracized for being less than perfect: too fat or skinny, ugly, gay. Alone in a sparsely furnished room, Aguilera zeroes in on songwriter/producer Linda Perry’s affirmation that everyone is beautiful, no matter what people say. “Words can’t bring me down,” she sings as the video’s characters conquer their insecurities: one woman bashes in her mirror, another tosses beauty magazines into a fireplace while a gay couple publicly kiss and hold hands. The video won a GLAAD Media Award for its positive portrayal of gay and transgender individuals. — GAIL MITCHELL

57. UGK feat. OutKast, “International Players Anthem (I Choose You)” (dir. Bryan Barber, 2007)

In the pantheon of music videos capturing some sort of ceremonial celebration, UGK’s “Int’l Players’ Anthem” stands as one of the all-time best. The absurdity of it the clip — including André 3000 in a kilt, a wedding party that counts Lukas Haas, and some of the best wedding outfits of all time (including Pimp C in head-to-toe white fur) — is nothing compared to how seamlessly the video captures the ebullience of the accompanying song. — S.J.H.

56. Beyoncé, “7/11” (dir. Beyoncé, 2014)

As we all know in 2018, The Carters love a production — but travel back with us to a Friday night in November 2014, when Beyoncé proved that she could go low-budget and still make a high-quality music video. The grainy, iPhone-looking footage of “7/11” features Beyoncé and her dancers goofing off in their underwear in various hotel-room settings. They twerk. They drink from red plastic cups. They turn hair dryers into props. Beyoncé uses someone’s butt as a surface for throwing dice. Quick-cut edits and scene jumps give the video a playful, frenetic energy, while choreography and costume changes make it pro without being overly polished. It’s safe to assume that the peak into this informal world is highly curated, but “7/11” has the intimacy of a selfie: Even though it doesn’t look like anything you’ve actually ever shot on your phone. — C.W.

55. Justin Bieber, “Sorry” (dir. Parris Goebel, 2015)

The Bieb brought choreography — and women — to the forefront of his “Sorry” visual, with the singer enlisting New Zealand’s all-female troupe ReQuest Dance Crew to bring his upbeat Purpose chart-topper to life. The colorful visual immediately racked up millions of views, with the wildly funky outfits inspiring Halloween costumes (just one week after the vid’s Oct. 22, 2015 release) and the ReQuest girls’ impressive moves sparking plenty of twerk-filled tributes across the Internet. Nearly three billion views later, “Sorry” proved that the heartthrob doesn’t even need to make an appearance to make one of his videos special. — TAYLOR WEATHERBY

54. Iggy Azalea feat. Charli XCX, “Fancy” (dir. Director X, 2014)

For Iggy Azalea’s biggest pop moment, the ‘90s throwback love of the 2010s was in full swing, with the Australian rapper and her hook-slinging co-star traveling back to the set of classic teen comedy Clueless. Iconic scenes — the classroom debate, the house party, the near-car crash on the freeway —  are reproduced with no-expense-spared flair, the cinematic set design and hordes of in-costume extras vaulting this 2014 good-life anthem straight into 1995 and all its plaid-clad pizzaz. Millennial Mean Girls babies nodding to their era’s spiritual forerunner — it’s game recognizing game in a music video that should similarly endure. — C.P.

53. Bruno Mars & Cardi B, “Finesse” (Remix) (dir. Bruno Mars & Florent Dechard, 2018)

Everyone loves a good dose of nostalgia, and Bruno Mars served up a giant splatter-painted platter of it with his “Finesse” video. Recruiting Cardi B for a remix of the high-energy 24K Magic track, Mars emphasized the song’s punchy ‘90s-style hip-hop beat with an homage to the era’s sketch-comedy classic In Living Color, using smooth moves and neon outfits to create an awesome spitting-image tribute. And the shout-outs were reciprocated: “Finesse” immediately drew praise from show stars Damon, Marlon, and Kim Wayans, and even sparked a reaction out of Jennifer Lopez, who got her start dancing as a Fly Girl on the show. Just as ILC was a cultural moment of the ‘90s, “Finesse” helped Bruno Mars and Cardi B solidify their place as icons of 2018. — T.W.

52. Taylor Swift, “You Belong With Me” (dir. Roman White, 2009)

A pivotal video in Taylor Swift’s pop mythology, “You Belong With Me” saw the burgeoning superstar still playing the underdog, whose cartoonish glasses, school-pride wardrobes, and goofy dance moves made her the idol (and/or go-to Halloween costume) for a generation of unsatisfied overachievers. But don’t forget she plays the bad girl in the video, too, and with equal aplomb; listen closely as she marks her territory with the boy next door in her red convertible, and you can hear the snakes from the Reputation Tour hissing impatiently in the distance. — A.U.

51. Lana Del Rey, “National Anthem” (dir. Anthony Mandler, 2012)

All of Lana Del Rey’s music videos are cinematic — it’s kind of her thing — but “National Anthem” has a movie-quality plot to boot. Del Rey stars first as Marilyn Monroe in a reimagined staging of the icon’s 1962 performance of “Happy Birthday, Mr. President,” then as Jackie Kennedy alongside A$AP Rocky’s suave, handsy JFK. Through Del Rey’s eyes, we see familial scenes unfold between one of the most fascinating couples in American history, culminating in a re-enactment of the Kennedy assassination. When Del Rey’s castle crumbles, you feel it in your chest, too, and her monologue at the end never fails to bring chills. — G.G.

50. The Diplomats, “Dipset Anthem” (dir. N/A, 2003)

[embedded content]

Twenty-plus Harlemites in their baggy, early-2000s best rocking at canted angles away from the camera, arranged on courtyard steps — this is a movement. This is what power looks like. This is what’s really good. That image primes you for Juelz Santana’s opening line: Today is a new day. And if you haven’t got the message, the beat shifts midway through the video into the magisterial “I Really Mean It” to drop an immaculate Cam’ron into your living room, stepping out of an Escalade in custom pink Dipset Timbs. Truly, did we dream this? — R.S.

49. Snoop Dogg feat. Pharrell, “Drop It Like It’s Hot” (dir. Paul Hunter, 2004)

One of the most memorable and instantly accessible tracks in Snoop’s extensive oeuvre got a similarly delectable video to match, shot in black and white on a blinding background with Pharrell supportively in tow as his head-nodding sidekick. The video’s sleek and casually surreal aesthetic was as ubiquitous at the time as the song itself, and now 15 years later it remains a blast to re-watch, particularly for its cameos by the similarly-ageless Pusha T, Chad Hugo, and Lauren London, not to mention Snoop’s young sons at the time. — D.R.

48. Orange Caramel, “My Copycat” (dir. Digipedi, 2014)

Orange Caramel have never been bound by K-pop conventions, and “My Copycat” represents the pinnacle of the trio’s out-of-the-box thinking with its interactive game. The full visual experience requires repeat viewings to scope out all of the Easter eggs hidden in each frame, as the sweeping Where’s Waldo shots turn a simple concept into a grandiose design. So this is what Orange Caramel meant when they sang, “Play games with my heart tonight.” — C.K.

47. Drake feat. Lil Wayne, “HYFR (Hell Ya Fucking Right)” (dir. Director X, 2012)

More than any of us Jewish kids would have ever dared daydream about during Hebrew School: the biggest rapper in the world documenting his own adult Bar Mitzvah, replete with the requisite torah reading, hora dancing, and ever so many popped bottles of Manischewitz. Did three-and-a-half minutes of Drake and Lil Wayne going HAM — err, going smoked salmon — on the former’s special day do more to get kids to their local congregations on Saturday morning than every rabbinical sermon this century combined? Impossible to say for sure, but chances are the JTS wouldn’t wanna see the box score of that showdown. — A.U.

46. Christina Aguilera, Lil’ Kim, Mya & Pink, “Lady Marmalade” (dir. Paul Hunter, 2001)

This clip from the Moulin Rouge soundtrack was more than a music video; it was a pop culture event. And while several groups of lady titans have recently tried to recreate the magic (see: “Girls” and “Bang Bang,” to name a few), none have come close to conjuring up the spectacle that was “Lady Marmalade.” With Mya’s hyper-feminine feathers, Pink’s rocker-chic top hat (a possible nod to Slash?), Kim’s blinged-out statement necklace, and Xtina’s ginormous, crimped mane, the video let each soul sister showcase their own personality without stealing the attention from the ensemble. — P.C.

45. Tierra Whack, “Whack World” (dir. Thibaut Duverneix and Mathieu Leger, 2018)

Philly rapper Tierra Whack’s 15-track, 15-minute debut is the perfect example of what a full-length visual can, and more importantly should, do for an audio body of work. She delivered a multi-part video so striking it demands attention be paid to the music, and vice versa. Each colorful and often jarring clip — one (literal) minute she’s getting a manicure with a brutally busted face, and the next she’s kicking back in a pet cemetery —  shows the ingenuity of an artist unfamiliar with boundaries. Let’s hope she never finds them. — LYNDSEY HAVENS

44. Carlos Vives, “La Tierra del Olvido” (dir. Carlos Vives, 2015)

This 2015 remake of Vives’ original video and recording from 1995 is an achingly beautiful love letter to Vives’ native Colombia, where he enlisted help from multiple fellow Colombian stars — including Fanny Lu, Fonesca and Maluma, each hailing from a different region in the country — for a stunning, sweeping trip through his homeland. Meanwhile, the evocative lyrics and melancholy, yet danceable melody, bring to mind memories of Gabriel García Marquez. — L.C.

43. Johnny Cash, “Hurt” (dir. Mark Romanek, 2003)

Whether you knew that country Jesus was knocking on heaven’s door in 2002 or not, this 2003 Mark Romanek masterpiece hits like a slow-motion mule kick to the gut. With his Mt. Rushmore face ravaged by time and hard living, Cash plucks a black guitar in a baroque living room overstuffed with the junk of life, as a montage of snapshots from his younger, hell raisin’ years flash across the screen. The devastating, funereal cover of Nine Inch Nails’ ’90s hit about decay oozes over the unshakable image of a frail Cash pouring out wine at a Last Supper and quick-cuts of Jesus being nailed to the cross. If this final reckoning doesn’t give you shivers, maybe you’re already dead inside. — GIL KAUFMAN

42. JAY-Z, “99 Problems” (dir. Mark Romanek, 2004)

Intended as his pre-retirement swan song, JAY-Z’s 2003 opus The Black Album gave fans several striking visuals, from “Change Clothes” to “Dirt Off My Shoulders.” But Hovito’s most visceral clip came when he and director Mark Romanek conjured up the black and white video for “99 Problems.” With “Problems” producer Rick Rubin riding shotgun, Jay masterfully illustrates his volatile relationships with the New York streets, the boys in blue and, ultimately, his own demise, as he is violently gunned down at the end of the video. Though Hov never really “faded to black” and continued to release more albums, the video for “99 Problems” had every rap fan petrified at the sheer thought of losing the culture’s most revered hero. Luckily for us, Superman is still taking out rap villains for a living. — CARL LAMARRE

41. Avril Lavigne, “Complicated” (dir. The Malloys, 2002)

“Dude, you wanna crash the mall?” 

–Avril Lavigne, in the first ten seconds of her first music video for her first single

Can you and your skateboarding friends/bandmates who look like a generic-brand Sum 41 (Sum 31?) really “crash” a mall if it’s daytime and already open? The premise is shaky, but whatever: From her first moment on MTV screens, Avril Lavigne established her extraordinary brand of PG-13 coming-of-age tomfoolery with a music video that’s almost too 2002 to function. The ties! The food court! The Jackass-style stunts! Life gets complicated when your friend starts getting all two-faced and trying on NFL jerseys and jewelry store bling, but finally, suburban early-’00s teens had their keeping-it-real heroine. — C.P.

40. Lady Gaga, “Paparazzi” (dir. Jonas Àkerlund, 2009)

[embedded content]

With the music video running double the length of the song, Gaga’s Jonas Åkerlund-directed “Paparazzi” covers a lot of ground: Attempted murder by Alexander Skarsgård, the successful murder of Alexander Skarsgård, old movie homages, Mickey Mouse-esque flip-up glasses, and some of the fiercest looks from Stefani’s early avant-dance diva days. The image of crutch-bound Gaga staggering across a purple carpet like Evil Robot Maria from Metropolis — while her dapper backup dancers vogue behind her — made it clear that unlike most pop stars on the planet, Gaga was here to get weird. And in 2009, we devoured it like the fame-obsessed monsters she was sending up. — J. Lynch

39. Kanye West feat. Pusha T, “Runaway” (dir. Kanye West, 2010)

More short film than music video, the genius of “Runaway” comes from its stark simplicity, and the meaning seemingly imbued within it. After the solo repetitive piano note that opens the song summons a troupe of black-clad ballet dancers, West begins to deliver each line with an increasing look of urgency and desperation on his face, ultimately climbing on top of the white piano before giving way to Pusha T’s verse and the dancers’ graceful stoicism. After building the song to its highest intensity with almost Christlike posture, West then cedes the floor to a ballet showcase as the song’s coda wrenches to its conclusion, ultimately ending with the rapper placing hand over heart, somber in one of the most quintessential images of his career. — D.R.

38. Gwen Stefani, “Hollaback Girl” (dir. Paul Hunter, 2005)

Ah, “Hollaback Girl:” a video that contains multitudes. This is prime Love.Angel.Music.Baby content, which means the Harajuku Girls — Stefani’s “super kawaii” but disturbingly silent Japanese girl squad — are front and center, riding through Van Nuys and Reseda in an Impala behind fearless leader Gwen, twerking, and (quietly) helping her spell “bananas.” The minimalist-meets-marching band sound, courtesy of the Neptunes, is in nearly every frame — along with Pharrell himself, blessing Stefani with a brief cameo and his ineffable brand of cool. But this video, in the end, is really all about Stefani and the charming ball of contradictions she has increasingly revealed herself to be: a magnetic-enough presence to make us consider her motives, and then abandon any semblance of logical thought to scream “This shit is bananas!” at the top of our lungs. — R.M.

37. Nicki Minaj, “Anaconda” (dir. Colin Tilley, 2014)

The Sir Mix-a-Lot sample “Anaconda” is built around may have been met with a collective eye roll for its obviousness, but Minaj fully redeemed herself by pairing it with her most memorable visual to date. Between a bikini-clad aerobics session and an unforgettable lap dance (one that Minaj bragged left guest-star recipient Drake, ahem, “excited like hell”), the colorful clip solidified Minaj’s superstar status, helping “Anaconda” slither to No. 2 on the Billboard Hot 100, still the rapper’s highest peak yet. — P.C.

36. Rihanna feat. JAY-Z, “Umbrella” (dir. Chris Applebaum, 2007)

A waterfall of sparks, umbrella-based choreography and — best of all — an iconic silvered silhouette of one of the biggest pop stars both then and now makes the recipe for this timeless video. It’s the perfect blend of sexy, playful, and artistic — risqué without being raunchy, thematic without being tacky. But the video’s biggest feat of all is proving that, even if only for Rihanna, it is possible to look that good with an umbrella. — L.H.

35. Dixie Chicks, “Goodbye Earl” (dir. Evan Bernard, 2000)

Starring a blonde Lauren Holly as the badass Mary Ann, pre-30 Rock Jane Krakowski as the helpless Wanda, and NYPD Blue star Dennis Franz (outfitted in a purposefully terrible wig) as the title villain, “Goodbye Earl” is a delightfully campy and colorful video from the Dixie Chicks about “the best of friends” who poison the titular character after he beats up Wanda. It’s a tale that highlights the power of the female bond, without making light of its serious subject matter. Yes, “Earl had to die,” but the clip shows us just how sweet revenge can be — and by video’s end, even a zombified Earl has joined in on the hoedown. — D.W.

34. Eminem, “Without Me” (dir. Joseph Kahn, 2002)

Like the song itself, the 2002 music video for “Without Me” is a fragmentation grenade of rapid-fire images designed to level Eminem’s critics — most of which he plays in the video himself. The rapper uses battery cables to fry a quasi-mechanical Dick Cheney lookalike and flips off his mother Debbie (Em in a blond metal wig, natch) as she appears on a When Sons Go Bad talk show. And Shady Records lieutenant Obie Trice, in a cameo, body slams Em-as-Moby, who called Shady’s music homophobic and misogynistic. But the real thrill of this clip is watching Shady and partner-in-crime Dr. Dre dressed, respectively, as comic-book characters Robin and Blade, head-bouncing with abandon as they rush to save a minor from purchasing a copy of The Eminem Show, which carries a Parental Advisory sticker. — F.D.

33. Britney Spears, “Oops!… I Did It Again” (dir. Nigel Dick, 2000)

Think of another outfit that’s had such decades-long legs. Everyone who’s seen this spacey Nigel Dick-directed mini-space epic — the follow-up to the equally one-of-a-kind “… Baby One More Time” — can instantly picture Brit’s second-skin red pleather catsuit (which was her idea, as was the concept of dancing on Mars). The whole experience is a crash course in Britney 101: seductive, if a bit wooden, group dancing; hard-core eye contact with the camera; requisite bare mid-riff squirming; and a silly comedic bit, all of which remain key parts of the star’s rust-free brand blueprint to this day. — G.K.

32. Tyler, the Creator, “Yonkers” (dir. Wolf Haley, 2011)

Tyler, the Creator had a vision: “‘I’m sitting on a chair rapping, I’m playing with a bug, I eat it, I throw it up, my eyes go black, and I hang myself.’ That was his treatment,” explained director Anthony Mandler (Beyoncé’s “Get Me Bodied,” Rihanna’s “Man Down”) in a 2011 interview. Mandler, along with director of photography Luis “Panch” Perez, gave Tyler the guidance and equipment he needed to self-direct the black-and-white, tilt-shifted video for “Yonkers.” In the breakout clip, Tyler does exactly what he outlined: He sits in a chair, lets a giant cockroach crawl over his hands, appears to take a bite, pukes, blacks out his eyes, and hangs himself. Effective enough to make stomachs the world over turn — and earn Tyler one of the all-time least-likely nods for a Video of the Year VMA. — C.W.

31. Carly Rae Jepsen, “Call Me Maybe” (dir. Ben Knechtel, 2012)

Fittingly, one of the century’s most beloved No. 1 hits arrived with a timeless visual. Carly Rae flips the male gaze of voyeuristic videos past and becomes the behind-the-blinds observer snooping on a backyard hottie, her giddy enthusiasm matching the lyrical tone perfectly. She’s fanning herself from the heat of the shirtless car-washing hunk a little too vigorously, fantasizing herself into the cover of the kitschy romance novel that’s sitting on her coffee table. She eventually musters the courage to make it out of the living room and into the steamy driveway scene, where the iconic “here’s my number” exchange leads to one similarly expectation-subverting final plot twist. — C.P.

30. Fountains of Wayne, “Stacy’s Mom” (dir. Chris Applebaum, 2003)

[embedded content]

“We looked at a lot of treatments and some directors were trying to be kind of arty and subtle with it, but Chris Applebaum went completely for the jugular,” Fountains of Wayne guitarist Adam Schlesinger said of the Applebaum-directed “Stacy’s Mom” clip in a 2004 interview. In retrospect, there was no better approach for the surprise pop smash: the broad, brightly colored comedy here — driven by model Rachel Hunter in the titular role — accentuates the song’s storytelling while mixing in some fantasy elements and highly appropriate Ric Ocasek references. Special kudos to Shane Habouca as the teen protagonist, so nimbly capturing the weird, confusing wonder that is male puberty. — J. Lipshutz

29. Luis Fonsi & Daddy Yankee, “Despacito” (dir. Carlos Peréz, 2017)

The most-watched video in YouTube history, directed by Carlos Perez, is an unabashed celebration of all things Latin, from the opening guitars and the vistas of Puerto Rico to the brightly painted homes of La Perla with their religious icons and chickens on the porch. And finally, there’s the dancing. Clichéd? Maybe, but totally real, and so expertly realized, we couldn’t help but watch. Ultimately, 5.3 billion viewers can’t be wrong. — L.C.

28. Missy Elliott, “Get Ur Freak On” (dir. Dave Meyers, 2001)

You can ask Kendrick Lamar, and he’ll tell you that one of his early inspirations was Missy Elliott. In the late ’90s and early 2000s, Elliott bloomed into a music video savant because of her audacious attempts to do the impossible in under five minutes. In ’01, Elliott wiped the competition with her Dave Meyers-shot visual for “Get Ur Freak On.” The funky track included a starry cast, with appearances by Ludacris, Busta Rhymes, and Eve. Meanwhile, Missy rhymes inside of an underground sewer, glides on top of a chandelier — and just when you thought the fun was over — she even sneaks in a quick verse from her Miss E LP highlight “Lick Shots” to restart the party all over again. — C.L.

27. Charli XCX, “Boys” (dir. Charli XCX & Sarah McColgan, 2017)

If you came for “Boys,” it’s boys you’ll find in this genius self-directed visual by Charli XCX — approximately 60 of them, in fact, from Diplo bench-pressing puppies and Joe Jonas seductively feasting on pancakes to Charlie Puth hosting a car wash. Did we mention the whole thing is bathed in millennial pink? The idea, Charli told BBC Radio 1, was to reverse traditional music video gender roles, making dudes do “all the sexy things that girls usually do in videos.” Whip-smart, thought-provoking, and fun as hell — not to mention providing fans with enough GIFs to last a Twitter lifetime — “Boys” set the Internet into mayhem, and left it with a message. — T.C.

26. Christina Aguilera feat. Redman, “Dirrty” (dir. David LaChapelle, 2002)

In the world of pop divadom, frequent reinvention isn’t just a choice, it’s practically a rule. But back in 2002, Christina Aguilera, loathful of her prefab pop princess persona, committed to one of the most explosive image resets in history with a red thong, a pair of chaps, and a dance move that would come to be known as “the slut drop.” You can only imagine the kind of language her critics used against her, and, indeed, there was plenty of outrage, vitriol, and mean-spirited mocking flung her way. Still, Aguilera seemed to weather the attention like a pro, and outlets that gave the young singer a chance to explain herself were treated to a brief lesson in sexual agency that was years beyond the general public’s understanding back then: “I may have been the naked-ass girl in the video,” she told Blender in 2003, “but if you at it carefully, I’m also at the forefront. I’m not just some lame chick in a rap video; I’m in the power position.” Guess Bionic wasn’t her only work ahead of its time. — N.F.

25. The White Stripes, “Fell in Love With a Girl” (dir. Michel Gondry, 2002)

What better way to play up the youthful sensation of a first love than with LEGOs, a classic toy for a classic rock song. The toy of choice works in a surprising way here, as the figurines capture the similarly unclear mindset of a boy so confused by love he believes “the two sides of my brain need to have a meeting.” But, most impressive of all is how the video turns something seemingly so simple into something much more complex — reportedly, the video was shot frame by frame, requiring the LEGOs to be rebuilt each time — a situation that anyone who has ever fallen in love is likely all too familiar with. — L.H.

24. Justin Timberlake, “Cry Me a River” (dir. Francis Lawrence, 2003)

There’s a long and tired history of Justin Timberlake using Britney Spears as a punch line, and, sure, the concept of of a disgruntled ex breaking into his former girlfriend’s house and lurking menacingly while she showers hasn’t aged well. But the kind of pettiness on display in the captivating “Cry Me a River” is an extinct breed: a revenge fantasy that doesn’t bother with plausible deniability or subtle shady references, and instead lets its darkest impulses curdle in the open for all to see. It wasn’t pretty, but it swung big — and everyone grabbed the popcorn and gave in to the twisted voyeurism of it all. — N.F.

23. Katy Perry feat. Snoop Dogg, “California Gurls” (dir. Matthew Cullen, 2010)

A bold, candy-colored cornucopia of delectable delights from start to finish, the 2010 Mathew Cullen-directed clip features Perry — sometimes covered only in strategically placed cotton candy, other times in a whipped-cream exploding bra, and always in a day-glo wig — as a pawn in Snoop Dogg’s Queens of Candyfornia board game, though of course she escapes Snoop’s clutches to lead a dance party on the beach. The only way the video would be better were if it were actually edible, especially Snoop Dogg’s army of bird-flipping gummy bears. — M.N.

22. M.I.A., “Bad Girls” (dir. Romain Gavras, 2012)

M.I.A. and director Romain Gavras had already proven that they could make an unforgettable video with 2010’s highly controversial “Born Free” — and two years later, they did it again with “Bad Girls.” Shot in Morocco, the video depicts Saudi drifting, where cars ride on their sides on only two wheels. Scenes of stunt men and women sitting on the outside of the tilted rides are juxtaposed with shots of M.I.A. and a glam posse of women covered in animal prints and metallic fabrics. Not one to be a bystander, M.I.A. even gets in on the drifting action, as she’s filmed lounging on the passenger door of a white BMW, filing her nails as the car cruises along sideways. How could the duo top that? “The next video needs to be shot on the moon,” Gavras mused in a behind-the-scenes video. “With hookers.”   

21. *NSYNC, “Bye Bye Bye” (dir. Wayne Isham, 2000)

This is a boy band video with a complex dramatic setup: We open in a dimly lit vaudeville theater, where the boys of *NSYNC hang from strings, manipulated from above by a diabolical but very pretty lady, who then cuts each of said strings to set one beautifully-coiffed *NSYNC member at a time on his very own mini-action adventure, racing cars through the desert or running across the top of a locomotive, Bond-style. But let’s be honest: That’s not what we’re here for. We’re here to see baby-faced J.T. mean mug for the camera! We’re here to see J.C. torturously belt his “Byyyyye baaaaby!” ad-lib. And above all, we are here to see the dance moves — the steps that would go on to be repeated at countless school dances and house parties, and that will certainly go down in music video history as some of the most classic choreography ever captured. Even if they were doing it in some sort of intergalactic vacuum, as *NSYNC appear to be in the “Bye Bye Bye” video, it was impossible to look away — and easy to imagine, as we followed those moves in our living rooms, that we could transcend the screen and live in their magical world, too. — R.M.

20. OK Go, “Here It Goes Again” (dir. Trish Sie, 2006)

[embedded content]

In 2006, long before Kim Kardashian broke the Internet, this Chicago band went viral with what is otherwise known as “the treadmill video,” a self-choreographed DIY affair — with the help of lead singer Damian Kulash’s sister Trish Sie, who was working as a ballroom dancer at the time. The clip features the band executing a series of (mostly) precision dance moves on six moving treadmills, and if you’ve ever fallen off one of those things, the video is as thrilling as it is entertaining, helping it rack up a reported 900,000 views in a single day. It wasn’t the first ambitious video the group had recorded — see 2002’s “C-C-C-Cinnamon Lips” — nor would it be the last, as the band would only scale up with subsequent visuals, most recently culminating in 2016’s “Upside Down & Inside Out,” shot in a plane that simulated zero gravity. How they’ll top that one remains to be seen, but we’ll probably find out soon enough. — F.D.

19. Miley Cyrus, “Wrecking Ball” (dir. Terry Richardson, 2013)

[embedded content]

“Wrecking Ball” was not the lead single for the all-grown-up coming-out party that was Miley Cyrus’ Bangerz, but nothing from that era, not even her controversial MTV Video Music Awards performance, forced viewers to recognize Cyrus on her own terms more than this Terry Richardson-directed clip. In it, Cyrus doesn’t push buttons — she, well, uses a sturdy tool often found at constructions sites to smash them, doing whatever she can to inspire feeling, any feeling, in those watching. There’s the raw play for emotion with the tearful close-ups, which Cyrus has said were meant to evoke Sinead O’Connor’s “Nothing Compares 2 U.” And then there’s the more polarizing attention-grabs — Cyrus licking a sledgehammer, appearing naked atop the title object as it swings around. Cyrus did whatever she could to get a reaction, and she didn’t care what kind she got as long as people were looking. “I think people are going to hate it,” she told Rolling Stone at the time, “and then when we get to the bridge, they’re gonna have a little tear and be like, ‘Fuck you!’ … It’s something that people are not gonna forget.” — N.F.

18. Sia, “Chandelier” (dir. Sia & Daniel Askill)

[embedded content]

Ever the elusive star, Sia opted to sit out the videos for 2014’s 1000 Forms of Fear. It yielded some of the most exhilarating visuals of the time, with a notable assist from then-pre-teen dancer Maddie Ziegler, then known for starring on Lifetime’s Dance Moms. Clad in a white, tight-cropped wig that resembles Sia’s signature coif, Ziegler stepped in for three of the videos from the set, most notably “Chandelier,” a clip with over 1.5 billion YouTube views, which tracks her as she dances through a dilapidated apartment, breathing life into the drab and mundane surroundings around her — and making a star out of its absent singer. — S.J.H.

17. My Chemical Romance, “Helena” (dir. Marc Webb, 2005)

[embedded content]

It wasn’t supposed to rain on set, but of course it did: My Chemical Romance and Marc Webb brought the emo downpour for “Helena,” and the elements simply responded in turn. One of three brilliant video collaborations between band and director for MCR’s starmaking Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge album, “Helena” was both the simplest and the most affecting: Its balletic funeral proceeding made for the best high-concept rock melodarama since Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris were doing feature-film dry runs with Smashing Pumpkins a decade earlier. But for all the elaborate choreography and staging, the most indelible moment remains the curl of lead singer Gerard Way’s lower lip as he sings the final tearjerking chorus — a reminder that the song was inspired by Gerard and bassist brother Mikey’s late grandmother, and thus the video held far more weight than just the prop coffin they were carrying. — A.U.

16. Drake, “Hotline Bling” (dir. Director X, 2014)

[embedded content]

The dorky dad moves, the Sean Paul references, the pastel lighting reminiscent of artist James Turrell, the slightly passive-aggressive lyrics, the D.R.A.M. “Cha Cha” controversy, the parodies, the endless memes! There was no way that anyone could escape the pop culture phenomenon that was Drake’s “Hotline Bling” video. Helmed by Director X, the video catches you off guard by beginning with a bunch of Drizzy-approved women working at — what else — a call center. As the camera zooms into the water cooler just 20 seconds in, the dancing that sparked a thousand GIFs begins. No matter how hard you try to look away, Drake keeps you lured in with every corny salsa step, cell phone-imitating hand wiggle, and agonized facial expression. Being the cultural mastermind that he is, Drake had to have predicted the video’s outcome. And somehow that makes it all the more brilliant. — B.G.

15. Kendrick Lamar, “HUMBLE.” (dir. Dave Meyers & The Little Homies, 2017)

[embedded content]

Kendrick Lamar’s Grammy-winning video for “Humble” is a lesson in irony: While the song is a finger-wagging anthem about modesty, the video itself is overflowing with wealth — both physical and metaphorical. Opening with Pope Lamar in a vacant church, the video rapidly shifts through scenes of the rapper playfully toying with a money machine, enjoying Grey Poupon, and teeing off atop a car’s roof. But the more memorable parts highlight black-centric symbolism. With Lamar recreating Leonardo da Vinci’s The Last Supper with all black men and and a woman fearlessly displaying her stretch marks, the video becomes yet another celebration of the culture in the rapper’s visual armory. — B.G.

14. Lady Gaga feat. Beyoncé, “Telephone” (dir. Jonas Åkerlund, 2010)

[embedded content]

What happens when you pair up two of the most influential female pop stars in recent history for a music video? That would be “Telephone,” the gloriously ridiculous, nine-and-a-half-minute spectacle from director Jonas Åkerlund that involves a women’s prison, Beyoncé (ahem, “Honeybee”) feeding Lady Gaga a pastry, a murder at a diner, a poison sandwich-making tutorial, Quentin Tarantino references aplenty, and a dance sequence that has spawned dozens of YouTube tutorials. If all that’s not enough to make “Telephone” an instant classic, consider that the video is actually a continuation of Gaga’s “Paparazzi” video from the year prior, with the same director — which ends with Gaga in the can — and let your mind be blown. Could a third installment be in our future? We can only hope. — T.C.

13. Taylor Swift, “Blank Space” (dir. Joseph Kahn, 2015)

[embedded content]

After years of receiving criticism for writing songs about her exes, Taylor Swift stuck it to the haters with a visual portrayal of just how “insane” she seems to former suitors and critics alike. The result is the singer’s best video to date, as “Blank Space” makes a mockery of the crazy-ex persona while entrancing viewers with imagery that’s both fanciful and harrowing. The video sets up a classic romance with a handsome guy, a breathtaking mansion, stunning gowns, and white horses (plus a cameo from her celebrity cat Olivia Benson), turning the seemingly perfect relationship on its head once infidelity and jealousy strike. Swift’s acting is brilliant as she takes a knife to painted portraits of her beau, chops up his clothes, and sings with mascara streaming down her face — almost making it believable that she’s as crazy as naysayers make her out to be. Whether you think she loves the drama or it loves her, Taylor Swift always makes sure her videos tell a story, and “Blank Space” could be its own damn novel. — T.W.

12. PSY, “Gangnam Style” (dir. Cho Soo-Hyun, 2012)

[embedded content]

It’s hard to believe that it’s been over half a decade since the satirical dance track “Gangnam Style” took the world by storm to become the first-ever video to be viewed over 1 billion times. With its over-the-top antics aimed at mocking the denizens of Seoul’s Gangnam neighborhood, numerous cameos from local comedians and pop stars, and its easy-to-learn equine choreography, PSY’s video became a surprise global sensation that turned all eyes to South Korea’s music industry. Though it’s no longer the world’s most-viewed music video, the legacy of “Gangnam Style” remains. — T.H.

11. JAY-Z & Kanye West, “Otis” (dir. Spike Jonze, 2011)

[embedded content]

What part of 2011’s impossibly joyful video for “Otis” feels the least likely in 2018? That it had a world premiere on MTV (like, MTV the cable TV channel) with a rebroadcast on MTV2 a couple hours later? That the most controversial thing about it — the thing that necessitated a disclaimer at the end — was that the needless deconstruction of the vehicle used for the clip’s joyriding would be seen as financially irresponsible? That the big celebrity cameo comes from a silent Aziz Ansari? That Kanye appears to be having an absolute blast? That Jay and Kanye act like they genuinely love each other? Or is it that there’s a gigantic American flag plastered on the wall behind the duo, with no message seemingly attached to it except to ask, “How could you not love a country where we get to do shit like this?” At the time, the point felt like a strong one. — A.U.

10. Childish Gambino, “This Is America” (dir. Hiro Murai, 2018)

[embedded content]

We get the music videos we want, but also sometimes the ones we need. Amid racial strife stirred up by a president who blames “both sides” and endless uniformed violence against minority men and women came actor/rapper Donald Glover’s funky, neck-snapping surprise statement. As Gambino, Glover — dressed in Confederate Army grey pants and no shirt in a possible nod to Afrofunk godhead/provocateur Fela Kuti — busts hip-cracking African Gwara Gwara dance moves while shooting a hooded black man and striking a pose straight outta Jim Crow imagery. Yes, it’s a lot. Released as Glover rebooted intergalactic schemer Lando Calrissian in Disney’s Solo, the sight of the Atlanta star grabbing his suddenly global platform and gunning down a church choir with a machine gun (à la the Charleston church massacre) then sprinting away from the Sunken Place tells you everything about the current state of the nation. — G.K.

9. Fatboy Slim, “Weapon of Choice” (dir. Spike Jonze, 2000)

[embedded content]

“Weapon of Choice” predicted the viral video as well as any other clip released in the pre-YouTube era, down to the fact that a lot of the people who remember the video probably couldn’t name who its song was by: Undoubtedly, at least half of the clip’s Internet traffic comes from “Christopher Walken hotel dancing” searches. “Choice” was a good song but a sensational video, one that brings the aforementioned four-word concept to such improbable three-dimensional life that it remains compulsively watchable even after the 57th time you’re seeing the guy who played Max Shreck doing the hands-in-pockets shimmy. The key? Those beginning and closing shots of a silent, still Walken seated in deep contemplation, with only the whirring sounds of hotel maintenance showing signs of life around him, as existentially haunting as anything Beckett ever staged. — A.U.

8. Beyoncé, “Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)” (dir. Jake Nava, 2008)

[embedded content]

Kanye West nearly committed career suicide when he crashed the MTV VMAs stage in 2010 to interrupt Taylor Swift’s acceptance speech for Best Female Video: “I’ma let you finish,” he infamously commented, “but Beyonce had one of the best videos of all time!” He wasn’t wrong, though — directed by Jake Nava, the stunning, breathless visuals for “Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)” marked a turning point in Beyoncé’s career: She had proven herself so talented, so enrapturing, that all you really needed to pull off a milestone video was to simply train the camera on her in an empty room and let her handle the rest. The resulting clip is an unstoppable assailing of the senses: Bey, clad in an over-the-shoulder leotard, is joined by two backup dancers, all in heels, hitting a for-experts dance routine and making it look simple. As the background gradient shifts colors and the cameras circle her, she never breaks focus for even a split second, keeping the energy on full throttle. It’s no wonder West put his name and rep on the line for the sake of the video — Beyoncé earned it. — S.J.H.

7. Britney Spears, “Toxic” (dir. Joseph Kahn, 2004)

[embedded content]

Britney Spears gifted the 21st century with a number of indelible looks, and the “Toxic” video boasts an embarrassment of them: Britney the Mile High Club-bound stewardess whose kiss turns a schlubby passenger into a stunning model; Britney the laser-tripping secret agent with fire engine-red hair; and of course, Britney in the buff, covered in diamonds and writhing around the floor like the Bond Girl to end all Bond Girls. Whether prancing down the aisle of an airplane or poisoning her boyfriend (five years before “Paparazzi”) and jumping off a balcony into the night, “Toxic” Britney wiped clean the schoolgirl imagery and set the tone for the next 15 years of her career: Breathtaking, flawlessly executed camp that was closer to drag culture than fashion week. — J. Lynch

6. Rihanna & Calvin Harris, “We Found Love” (dir. Melina Matsoukas, 2011)

[embedded content]

Anyone who wondered if pop stars had lost their ability to excite, to surprise, to unnerve with their music videos had to feel the “We Found Love” clip like a bolt of lightning to the chest. Melina Matsoukas’ dizzying visual for Rihanna’s career-recalibrating smash Calvin Harris collab was a tale of a toxic relationship starring RiRi and a pouty, peroxide-blond gentleman who looks a lot like oh-take-a-guess, edited like a light-speed four-minute relationship montage that recreates the shock all music videos must’ve delivered to fans of classic Hollywood back in ’81. Like Trainspotting, what makes “We Found Love” really frightening is how palpably electric the highs are, enough to make it plausible that its star would do what it took to feed her addiction initially. But that doesn’t mean you don’t still breathe a sigh of relief when she decides to choose life at the end instead. — A.U.

5. OutKast, “Hey Ya!” (dir. Bryan Barber, 2003)

[embedded content]

Coming up on the 15th anniversary of its release, “Hey Ya!” remains an infectious slice of pop culture — as does its video. A twist on the Beatles’ own era-defining appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show in 1964, “Hey Ya!” finds OutKast turning the British Invasion on its ear, complete with black & white footage, a screaming female audience, a black family viewing the momentous TV performance at home, and Ryan Phillippe in the guise of host Sullivan. Speaking of guises, Big Boi acts as the band manager, while André 3000 portrays all eight band members, including background group The Love Haters — all garbed in eye-catching green finery. During the two-day shoot in Los Angeles, André reportedly performed “Hey Ya!” 23 times. Beyond introducing the phrase “shake it like a Polaroid picture” into the pop lexicon, OutKast also single-handedly revitalized the camera company’s public image. The Bryan Barber-directed video later won a bevy of awards, including video of the year at the 2004 MTV Video Music Awards. — G.M.

4. Beyoncé, “Formation” (dir. Melina Matsoukas, 2016)

[embedded content]

Beyoncé stopped the world for the umpteenth time when she dropped the explosive song and video for “Formation,” just a day before performing the anthem at Super Bowl 50. Frequent collaborator Melina Matsoukas may have shot the video in Los Angeles, but every second is deeply rooted in Louisiana and its Creole background — the ancestral origin of Beyoncé’s mother, Tina Knowles Lawson. The historical references are overwhelming: the Antebellum-style houses, Beyoncé’s Victorian hoop skirts and petticoats, the now-legendary wide-brimmed hat suitable for American Horror Story: Coven, Blue Ivy happily rocking her fluffy afro, the singer being submerged underwater while on top of a police car as a nod to Hurricane Katrina , the inclusion of New Orleans stars Big Freedia and the late Messy Mya. At one point in the video, a young boy is seen dancing in front of a line of gun-clad officers, who respond by putting their hands up. In a time where racial tensions were climbing to new, uncomfortable heights, “Formation” served as an active reminder that black people could not be silenced. To top it all off, the “Formation” video dropped just a few months before the singer’s second Super Bowl halftime performance, which further shoved its socio-political message in the face of America. — B.G.

3. D’Angelo, “Untitled (How Does It Feel?)” (dir. Paul Hunter, 2000)

[embedded content]

Naked as the day he was born, save for a gold chain and bracelet, D’Angelo is the entirety of the simple, single-take video for “Untitled.” The song asks how does it feel. and the video attempts to answer what it looks like, and it does so with such candor that the song and video have become inseparable. You see parts of this man’s body move, tense, and ripple in ways that must’ve been previously only available to his romantic partners. From the vantage of 2018, the self-scrutinizing gloom that it cast on his career, the way it fueled his performance anxiety as fans showed up to the post-video tour dates expecting total access to Adonis each night, feels safely in the rearview. D’Angelo returned in 2014 with Black Messiah and toured successfully after its release, allowing us to once again to just admire the physicality and emotion of one of the greatest sex jams ever made. — R.S.

2. Missy Elliott, “Work It” (dir. Dave Meyers, 2002)

[embedded content]

While most of her contemporaries settled for music videos that made them look tough or sexy, Missy Elliott got strange with hers, and “Work It” is a perfect distillation of her idiosyncratic vision of warped world. From upside-down dance moves on a post-apocalyptic playground to Missy swallowing a Lamborghini whole and donning a dunce cap for the deliciously goofy “why you act dumb?” segment, Elliott pushed imagery into the mainstream that most rappers, rockers, and pop stars wouldn’t dare go near in an era before being “weird” or “nerdy” had cultural cache. Sure, someone else might have a Prince parody or a split-second Halle Berry cameo in their clip, but would they also have a U.S. Marine mouthing “give you some-some-some of this Cinnabun” or the lead artist lip-syncing to camera while bees swarm their face? Like its forward-thinking Under Construction parent album, Missy’s “Work It” video made it clear that what was normal was boring, and the future belonged to those who weren’t afraid to defy expectations, conventions, and even gravity on occasion. — J. Lynch

1. Lady Gaga, “Bad Romance” (dir. Francis Lawrence, 2009)

[embedded content]

By the time she crawled out of your mom’s Volvo roof box to deliver her first rah-rah-rahs, Lady Gaga had already hosted a poolside orgy, transformed the subway into her debaucherous lair, and sought poisonous revenge on Alexander Skarsgård for throwing her off the edge of a castle. Her ideas were big; her budgets were catching up. But the video for “Bad Romance,” the lead single from 2009’s The Fame Monster, went beyond the kind of spectacle that rising superstars like her had the resources to pull off. It offered a glimpse into an entire cinematic world that thrilled and disturbed in equal measure, expanding the possibilities of what a music video could achieve — and challenging other stars to step their game up at the same time.

“Bad Romance” features some of her most gorgeous music-video looks — as silly as it seems now in the post-Joanne era, the video was praised by some critics for the “stripped-down” and “normal” makeup on display — as well as her most unsettling. The white crowned bodysuits look like Max from Where the Wild Things Are hit up a fetish club. The bathtub-bound Gaga with CGI-enlarged eyes beckoned to the uncanny valley. And despite all the glossy, sterile exteriors abound, an element of body horror lurks underneath the surface, from shots that linger over dancers’ exaggerated bony spines to the emaciated Gaga-monster hiding in a cage during the second verse. Pause the video at any moment and you’ll probably find yourself starting at something worth dissecting; even the briefest scenes and cutaways — Gaga suspended in a cloud of diamonds, Gaga covering her face with razor-blade sunglasses, Gaga stomping around in alienesque Alexander McQueen heels — could have sustained their own storylines as standalone videos.

Those mini-moments were mostly in service of a bigger story, one in which Gaga gets kidnapped and drugged by models, sold into some kind of sexual slavery via an ominous pack of Russian men, and eventually enacts a fiery revenge plot. Considering how “Bad Romance” cemented the branding and iconography of her “Little Monster” fanbase — witness the birth of the monster claw! — it’s a little ironic that Gaga has described the video’s plot as an allegory about the entertainment industry, one that asks viewers to examine their relationship to their idols, what they ask of them, and at what cost they get it.

Of course, Lady Gaga would go on to make more elaborate music videos than “Bad Romance” — the mini-movie that was “Telephone,” the space opera that was “Born This Way,” each weaving in social commentary in both obvious and subtle ways. But more than providing any one look, dance move, or message, “Bad Romance” was a supernova reminder that there was still so much room to push the art form — and that no one was more game to lead the charge than the free bitch herself, baby. It’s fitting that the video ends with the singer torching the place and everything in her path, lying among the embers and shooting sparks out of her pyro-bra. With “Bad Romance,” she took the old standard for great music videos and set it aflame, then got to work building a new one. — N.F.

[embedded content]